#but yeah this was a little update on me and as usual im losing my mind over bin <3 thanks for tuning in and tune in next time for more

[pansy-picnics]

Hiya!

I’m curious, what do you think uknighted dream would argue about and how would they apologise to each other?

Cause I personally think Cass hates apologising, Eugene’s not used to it, and Rapunzel according to the show can do no wrong!

Oh, and if you don’t mind me asking, are you planning on updating Children of the moon soon? Sorry, it’s just one of my favourite fics for this ship!

Thank you x

God ive been so bad about that fic i swear i have so many ideas for it but this year has been SOOO busy for me 😭😭 most of my free time has been dedicated to drawing and playing games cuz writing doesn’t come as naturally to me ngl….BUT SOON ENOUGH I WILL LOCK IN I PROMISE!!!! its been crossing my mind a lot more recently snd ive started a little bit of the next chapter…Ur guys’ support means the world to me im so happy to know people enjoy it as much as i do 🥹 and i desperately wish i had more time to dedicate to all my projects

as for your first question though….LMAO yeah the show did rapunzel DIRTY….Honestly it really depends for me, but i think you’re definitely right about cass and eugene. and rapunzel definitely struggles i think to apologize Genuinely, because she can get really overwhelmed with her guilt and anxiety to the point that she loses sight of the actual problem. its kind of a rough spot for all of them

I honestly haven’t thought abt it a lot so idk if i know what they’d fight about Specifically, but what i can come up with off the top of my head is ummm

rapunzel is a chronic Fixer. whenever someone expresses a problem to her shes quicker to try and “solve” it than she is to just. Listen because she kind of has grown up with the idea that everything is Her fault and She needs to fix everything. I think cass and eugene can end up feeling really unheard because of this. Usually it’s just something they can quickly talk through but when put on top of other conflicts it exacerbates things a LOT.

Raps, cass and eugene can all be INCREDIBLY stubborn and set in their ways and they sometimes struggle to hear each other out. rapunzel i think has her moments, but generally she isn’t too bad about it; eugene has a temper and he can be VERY petty but i think unless he REALLY has a reason to hold a grudge against you, he usually just needs about a week to cool down- but Queen of Anxious Attachment Cassandra Tangled (tm) can end up going AGES holding a grudge and just refusing to check in with anyone. as you probably can imagine it does not go well

i think bc rapunzel has such a strong belief that love is transactional she sometimes gets trapped in a cycle where she basically attempts to min-max her time with eugene and cass respectively because she worries if she isn’t spending “equal” amounts of time with them then it means she must not love them enough. as you might imagine this causes a lot more harm than good….

cass is REALLY REALLY bad at asking for help and being vulnerable and especially admitting when someone does something that hurts her. i think this causes a LOT of really stupid miscommunications between them. eugene or rapunzel are both usually able to talk her through it depending on who shes upset at…and it really helps to have a third party there who she trusts because otherwise it could easily just spiral out of control and cause her to grow bitter and distant (As seen in canon LOL)

Ummm….To be completely honest i cant really see a lot of situations where cass and eugene like, Genuinely fight after they get with rapunzel. they obviously still bicker a lot but like, frankly after they’ve both figured their shit out i just don’t think they have much of a reason to fight anymore. Their whole rivalry has always been really childish and most of the more serious stressors have already been taken care of by the time the series ends. i think most of their fights are just over stupid shit and get resolved within the hour. i think they’d have to both go through a MAJOR traumatic event to actually get as bad as they were in season 1 again LMAOOO

How they apologize definitely depends a lot on the situation (go figure) but i genuinely dont think they get into Big fights very often…so when it does happen it takes a toll on all of them.

eugene i imagine is a little extra but sincere. doesn’t do Too much because he doesn’t want to overwhelm the girls, but probably just picks a quiet night and orders takeout or makes a small dinner to talk over. sometimes it can take eugene a while to realize when he’s fucked up but when he DOES realize it, it hits him like a TRUCK and he IMMEDIATELY jumps to do everything in his power to rectify it. he’s a big softie <3

cass is a lot more prideful than raps and eugene whether she realizes it or not, so its a lot harder for her to admit her faults, even when she knows she was wrong. she doesn’t like to make a big deal of when she apologizes because it’s really embarrassing for her. she’s the kind of person to send the apology text to the group chat and have to like physically put her phone down and start pacing around the room. To me.

rapunzel, like i said struggles to genuinely apologize because her anxiety and guilt can just become so overwhelming….she usually has to spend a bit of time away before shes ready to Really talk things out. When she is she definitely shows it quietly but clearly, she writes little notes with a paper bouquet and leaves them around where the other two will find them. they leave her little notes back and let her come to them when she’s ready.

admittedly i’m Not good with thinking of character conflicts off the top of my head, they have to come to me in Visions, and i just don’t end up thinking about a lot of ukd conflicts so hopefully this is okay LOL…..I would love to hear other ppls thoughts….. :3

[last-c2usade]

ABOUT

Mun's name is Mal! 22. Pronouns are he/him. only. Copying my bestie's profile to a T btw so if you recognize this yeah. you recognize it.

FIRST! 18+ ONLY PLEASE AND THANK YOU

so some facts!

i'm in psychology and i have an issue where i really enjoy writing my characters super realistically and i'll be a nuisance about their psychology and reasoning for why they do what they do

i love shitty fictional people. i mean it. the shittier the better. be wary of this. when i mean shitty i mean SHITTY terrible awful people

im EXTREMELY good at forgetting to keep up with shit. i dont even read webcomics anymore coz if shit takes too long to update i lose interest. if this blog dies its coz i forgor

i try to be friendly and nice! you can talk to me about movies and writing and psychology. i'll try not to infodump on you but um. if allowed i WILL

please for the love of god, i appreciate you, i empathize, etc, but do not traumadump on me without asking. i will feel too bad to say stop/no bc i dont know you well enough to tell you know and i WILL ghost you

Main guy here is S. Adamantine! He prefers you call him that. Alien, ex-member of the court. Has a huge ego he's trying to work on. Extremely patient, clingy, a little neurotic (I say this as lovingly as possible. it's true tho. he's like me. we're both fucked in the head). Loves books! Loves bikes and mechanics (don't mention it's a lowblood thing or he'll Have you), kinda' shy! Awkward as fuck.

pronouns are HE/HIM only

>types like this! usually with p2ope2 g2amma2. likes to think his qui2k is a sign of cultu2ed thinking<

Rules and Things to keep in mind!

tags are! #((ooc for ooc stuff, #>pix< for ic pictures, #logs. for written stuff, and #>dia2y< for any talk posts mars makes ic

i tag for tws/anything general i might find sus but thats about it other than the above!

if you wanna' talk about anything, message me on @theymakemedreamyourdreams ! you can also ask for my discord

open for shipping! though he's a little iffy on romance. ping me n we can discuss!

open for anyone! you MUST BE 18+ tho

can also dm this account for ic dms!

dont think i wanna' do m!as! but feel free to ask and i'll see!

gifts are ok! welcome even

nsfw comments allowed!!

both ocs and canon for any fandom is okay! keep in mind, he's troll and WILL be mean towards aliens

keep ooc and ic SEPARATE! i dont condone any of the sus shit my guys may be up to btw! ada is a little more well-behaved, but his opinions do not reflect mine.

open for plot! i like plotting. i also like rps. i may forget about them. or lose interest. but schemes are always welcome! (i may be picky)

ada is kinky as shit. he can get REALLY nsfw if you let him. fair warning

i LOVE dark plots and dark shit. and realistically terrible people. i love serial killers and nsfw shit and guns and fictional gun violence a lot of dark stuff. and angst. just fair warning!

lemme know if you want certain things tagged!

feel free to remind me about open threads / plots / etc! i am prone to ghosting if i lose interest tho

feel free to lemme know if im doing something unintentionally incorrect btw! i may be unaware of shit

i block deliberately. if something makes me uncomfortable and i feel left out of shit or whatever, i'll block to keep myself contained! i dont want anything to do with drama!!

i like to say swear words like fuck shit cunt piss bitch. adamantine does too

[gayspock]

ok im into generations

right so i wasnt sute about this one bc ok as ive said im not a huge tng fan + combine that with what ive heard about kirk in this one im kinda really scared 3:

also update: we got to order indian which my family usually arent onboard with but... :3 idc... im enjoying it yammy yammyyyyyyy

CAN I ALSO SAY. IM THE FUNNIEST BITCH EVER FOR WATCHING TREK TO STOP BIRTHDAY BLUES AND IT JUST MAKING ME EMO AS HELL ANYWAYS

hi oh MY GOD SHES SO PRRTTY OHHHH MY GODDDD HIII DEMORA HIII GIRLLIEEEE

also god ... this one makes me emo FUCK OFF THE END OF UNDISCOVERED CPUNTRY MADE ME FUCKING EMO GOD FUCKING HELL

god seriously though im trying not to be emo im meant to be watching these to not be emo but it does make me sad sometimes even watching stories like these thinking about where im gonna be if i make it to my 60s onwards like kirk + knowing i wont even have enterprise moments to look back on something something i never lived instead there was just a sad little hollow existence ... you guysknow what i mean. i wish i could be in the stars forever....

also it is funny how like so many of the trek movies are about how washed up kirk is its so fucking funny like we've been doing this bit since motion picture LOL

A

ALSO WAIT

HANG ON

CONNOR?

CONNOR JUMPSCARE CONNOR ROY JUMPSCARE

fucking connor typica- TIM RUSS?

if theres one thing about tim russ is that he'll be in a star trek showw or movie it doesnt even matter any more-

hi guinan . what the dickens.

also guys i ate too much food tummy hurt

also woag... 78 years later

ALSO YOU GUYS ARE ALL TAKING THE MICK LIKE "DONT TELL ME TUESDAY" WELL CAPTAIN CONNOR ROY DIDNT WANNA GO AFTER THEM KNOWING WHAT HE KNEW ABOUT THE SHIP YOU GUYS JUST BUGGERED OFF

come on kirk lets go girlie

the enterrprise is seriously like the pear wiggler

uhm

uhm

ehrm

NO SERIOUSLY IMAGINE BEING SCOTTY HERE ANDTHEY JUST LOSE KIRK

OH GOD IMAGINE BEING CAPTAIN CONNOR ROY. sorry i dont remember his seriouss name

oh fucking hell oh god WHY DID YOU GUYS DO THIS. JESUS FU CKING CHRIST. THIS IS SUCH A HARROWING END I... GOOD FUCKING HEAVENS . LIKE EVN THOUGH I KNOW HES SOMEHOW OKAY I CANT FATHOM IT FOR EVERYONE ELSE. JESUS.

HI WORF

HI RIKER

HI GEORDI

HI TROI

HI CRUSHER

HI DATA

.... hi picard. i guess. 😒

SORRY I FORGOT SHIT I ACTUALLY DO MISS THEM.

also god everyone can we be hoenst i did start to not like data as much not so much because of the show but basically just existing in fan space kind of really started to ruin him as a character for me but i will be honest him pushing bevs into the water and everyone being mad bc he just tried to match their energy yeah okay i feel that data sniff okay

ALSO PICARD SNAPPING. I LIKE IT WHEN HES A CUNT FRANKLY. I HATE IT WHENEVER THEY TRY TO MIDDLE GROUND IT WITH HIM. LOSER BEHAVIOUR. HES BEST WHEN HES FUCKING HORRIBLE TO PEOPLE AND I STAND BY THAT NO ON ELSE GETS ME

so is this where they find kirk

you know whats fucked up is spock is still alive somewhere ... ugh thatbreaks my heart SORRY. [looks shy] LIKE ... I ASSUME KIRK DIES BEFORE THE END OF THE MOVIE SO THEY NEVER MEET AGAIN FUCKING FINE DOES ANYONE TELL HIM WHAT HAPPENED THOUGH I'M- im going to kill myself

fucking hell though imagine if you pulled

YAAAYYY SPOOIT HI SPOT HIS PSOT BABY HIII SPOT HIIII SPOT HI BABY HI SPOTHIS SPOT

FUCK OFF

BRING SPOT BACK

CAN WE GET A SPOT CAM

i'll kms

oh god fucking- I FORGOT EMOTION CHIP WAS IN THIS FUCKING MOVIE. KILL YOUTSELVES. I HATE THIS. ITS BEYOND THE WORST FUCKIGN FECISION YVOEU EVE SORRY IM SEEING RED THIS IS WEHY I SHOULDTA HEV WATHCE ok breathe im breathing im normal im in and out breathing

he doesnt keep it thoughdoes he like

ugh

i feel like there is a way to do the emotion chip imagine if theyused it as a metaphor forlike.. masking, maybe and it really just made it all the worse for him and he rejected it bc he- YOU KNOW HES HAD EMOTIONS ALL ALONG THEYRE JUST NO THTE SAME AS YOURS ... I HATE MY LIFE I HATE ALL OF- BONG

me: gosh golly i mean how can i articulate my emotions regarding the emotion chip

also this cunt soran is just dickin about innit also do i just recognise him ta clockwork orange posters (has never seen the actual movie) where else have i seen him has he just got a face on him or what

NO DATA IS SO REAL FOR THIS WHO DOESNT REMEMBER SOMETHING 10 BILLION YEARS AGO AND HAVE A RIGHT GIGGLE

also you'd think regarding the data chip there'd be more of a fuss about him sticking it in considering what occurred to lore

GOD

THE WAY GEORDI DOESNT EVEN FIND HIM FUNNY. CLASSIC. AS IT SHOULD BE. THATS NOT OUR DATA IS IT NOW.

thatbing said im also a little sad like hes just learnt humour ITS RATHER NOVEL TO HIM . SORRY IF THAT MAKES ME SICK TO DEFEND IT.

okay there we go a complicat- JESUS THAT SUBTLE EFFECT ON HIS MOUTH THAT WAS SCARY DONTDO THAT EEEK HEAVENS

OH GOOD HEAVENS

THIS TIME IN: DATA LEARNS WHAT FEAR IS

THATS SO FUNNY SORRY i shouldnt laugh

eek.

you know what thats also funny to think about how like picard and such would have like super HD pics of them as kids do you know what i mean because when i see older people i think god theres only shitty pics of you when you were little bc cameras wont commonpla-

uhm

sorry picard is crying

i feel uncomfortable

dont fucking do that im a capricorn i w

oh jesus what the fuck . oh good fucking heavens i . I FUCKING HELL CAN I SAY IF I WAS A COUNSELOR LIKE TROI I'D KILL MYSELF A MILLION TIMES IM SO UNCOMFORTABL PLEASE FUCKING HELP ME

OH DEAR LORD

"the closest i'd get to having a child of my own" wyou've got some juice in you old man come on get fucking then

UGH OF COURSE PICARD HAS SOME FUCKING GRANDIOSE FUCKING FAMILY LINE. WHY. i thought it made more sense him being a smalltown little farmer or whatever. ANYWAY HE SHOULD BE LIKE ME. MY GRANDAD DROVE LORRIES FOR ASDA.

anyway what i was sayinh oh yes the pictures its strange i guess thinking about them being so farin the future sometimes when it comes to little things

what i will say is the second a klingon woman shows up with brilliant cleavage im like on my knees begging and i dont even know what for half the time im just like [whining noise] .. uhm. god i hope people dont read these lbs anyways

can we be nice to geordi for once- MORE NORMALYOU'LL END UP ON YOUR ASS CUNT

YEESH

CUNTYOU KLNOW WHATS ABNORMAL IS YOUR FUCKING HAIRLINE ITS GIVING JEFF WINGER FROM COMMUNITY sorry

GEORDI IS MY BEST FUCKING FRIEND

if i was data and i was feeling emotions for the first time i'd be crying throwing up being sick gaspig for geordi. i know this because im doing it anyways and im not even involved really

OKAY NO YEAH

YEAH ME TOO

I'D BE LIKE KMS JUST DO IT I HATE THIS SO ME BESTIE

PICARD

PICARD LET HIM FUCKING GO BEDDY BYES AREGHGHHH

also again me watching trek movies to escape my existential dread but good heavens every single time they get super existential wrt time and whatnot STOP IT. QUIT IT OUT

"the only engineer in starfleet that doesnt go to engineering" HELP LEA HIM AL-GJA0-GKAGKS[DGOSD[GOSDG

I JUST. LOVE. SCANNING FOR LIFE FORMS

ok his cute little doo doo doo okay

THESE KLINGON WOMAN SO HOT

god it wouldnt be a star trek movie if we didnt blow the shit out of the enterprise

dont get me wrong her hair is gorgeous still but ugh i wish troi got to have her little curlie whirlies

i need the klingon woman to

sorry

stop sentence

im

theyve exploded now so i'll behave

also we're like an hour in and kirk hasnt reappeared which makes this hysterically funny if theyre going to have him pop up again for 0,2 seconds and then axe him like jesus christ way to kill him off thats so funny like is any of this worth it im bewildered

TBY THE WAY THE ENTERPRISE CRASHING IS SO FUNNY BECAUSE I SWEAR DOWN THEYVE REUSED THE SAME FOOTAGE OF IT CRASHING AND THEN CUTTING INTO ALL THE DRAMA ON THE SHIP ITSELF BUT LIKE, DOES IT MAKE SENSE THE FOOTAGE OF THE SHIP ITSELF ON THE EXTERIOR VIEW WILL BE LOOPING ITS POSITION HELP

also i said it earlier but i cant tell if soran(?) actually does look like jeff rom community or if im just focussing on the hairline am i crazy

HANG ON I WENT TO GOOGLE TO SEE IF ANYONE ELSE THOUGHT IT AND THE CUNT WAS IN COMMUNITY WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ON ABOUT

WHEN

I MEAN GRANTED IM TALKING MORESO ABOUT THE RESEMLANCE WITH HIM IN THIS MOVIE RATHER THAN HIM BEING OLDERHANG ON7

CAPTAIN picard waking up in - oh my god............. this is scary

NO THIS IS SCARY IM TERRIFIED

DONT DO THAT

ITHIS IS SCARTY

IM SCARED OF CHILDREN LOVING THEIR FATHERS

whos his wifey okay

generic woman thats so funny . kill yourself beverly crusher

rene ... sorry its so easy to forget picard is literally FRENCH with a BRITISH accent. double homicide. christ

hi guinan

also okay lets talk more about this movie. gusy lets talk about this movie.

"but these are all mine" is such a hysterically funny way to think of your kids

PA PA. HELP ME BUILD MY CARSTLE. PA PA FANK YOU FOR THE DOLLS. SHE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL. GOD PICARD IM SORRY BUT I CANT COPE WITH YOUR KIDS victorian ASS CHILDREN AND YOU DONT EVEN GIVE A RATS ASS ABOUT YOUR WIFE . FUCKING HLL PICARD. TRUE MIRROR OF YOUR PSYCHE

NOW KIRK FINALLY REAPPEARS WHAT IS HE JUST.... CHOPPING WOOD THIS IS SO FUNNY

aww he has a doggy and a clock with bones and-

HELP OF COURSE THEY GAVE JAMES A RANDOM WOMAN TOO THIS IS SO FUNNY ANTONIA WHO THE HELL IS ANTONIA GOD BLESS US ALL ITS SO FUNNY AS IF

i love kirk im sorry i stand by it when he just fucking has a new woman every fucking day of the week why not .. have fun

THIS IS SO FUNN Y I DONT KNOW WHY I ASSUMED KIRK WOULD HAVE A BIGGER ROLE IN THIS GOD BLESS

"youre a starfleet officer. you have a duty." I MEAN HE WAS LIKE... LITERALLY KIND OF RETIRING MAN IN FAIRNESS.

why are they bonding over their lack of families . lonely middleaged men well. theres a solution like well

maybe boost . sorry not boost. "boost". i mean but the ghosts that boost reported. were right. and they should just have gay sex here to solve their problems . fill the holes in your hearts and the holes well i didnt say that who said that

AGAIN i guess they didnt want to isolate the audiences or whatever but god wouldnt it just . i dont know work better if you even chose carol and david or something like FUCKING ANTONIA. HELP. AND IS ANTONIA IN THE ROOM RIGHT NOW

OH MY GOD

HORSEGIRLS

STAR TREK EQUESTRIA NEW SERIES CALLED IT

I LOVE IT HEN MEN ARE HORSEGIRLS

aww the horsies love e- GUYS THE HORSIES LOVE EACH OTHER AND I WAS ABOUT TO GET WEEPY THINKING-

OKAY SO MY THOUGHT PROCESS JUST NOW WAS WAHH THE HORSES ARENT REAL THEYRE IN THE NEXUS > BUT OH GOD EVEN IF THEY WERENT THE HORSES ARENT REAL ITS A MOVIE > BUT WAIT OH MY GOD THE HORSES ARE REAL ACTUALLY IN REAL LIFE THEYRE NOT JUST A PROJECTION > OH FUCKING GOD THESE HORSES ARE PROBABLY LONG DEAD

SORRY

"dont let them do anything stay there" KIRK YOU ARE THE REASON THEYRE FUCKING WHEELING PATRICK STRWART AROUND FOR A THIRD SEASON IN 2023 YOU FUCKING MENACE

THANK GOD YOU MENTION SPOCK

sorry

PICARD ARE YOU EVEN GOING TO MENTION SPOCK IS STILL ALIVE AND THAT YOURE BESTIES WITH HIS LATE FATHER

and bones could be too i dont know he was alive in ep 1 of tng but frankly well yeah

WOAHHH HI KIRK

HES JAMES T KIRK. BITCH

so is james t kirk literally going to die HERE now because thats so funny imagine that youre stuck in limbo for 80 years and then you get out and instantly eat shit i mean theres a way to do that gracefully i think but this obviously well

SORRY I FEEL LIKE IM GOING INTO THIS WITH A PRECONCIEVEDNOTION ARENT I BUT ITS HARD NOT TO

also why do so many of kirks lines sound... whats the word? recorded and added back in later?i forget the term but it sou-

e

DID KIRK

STRAIGHT UP JUST

IN .2 SECONDS

I DONT KNOW WHY I

I EXPECTED LIKE SOME FANFARE DID HE JUST

HI IS KIRK DEAD DID I EVEN

CAN I PROCESS THAT KIRK IS DEAD? AM I ALLOWED TO?

HEY GUYS?

BLOW UP. BITCH. 4JESUS OKAY SO NOW WE

OKAY SO KIRKIS LIKE FUCKING

RIGHT FINE JESUS OK........

"IT WAS FUN. <3" #DIES

god how are we... are we just burying him here, too? like good lord i dont know what i expected cant we... i dont know. christ . it feels so messed up to see kirk die and have a moment with PICARD sbeing the only person just standing over his grave and for him-

SORRY I MEAN THIS IS IRONIC BECAUSE KIRK WAS ALSO A CRIMINAL ABOUT THIS BUT I DONT TAKE AS MUCH OFFENCE WITH TOS BECAUSE THATS JUSRT SORT OF TOS YOU KNOW BUT IM STILL VERY GRUMPY About picard in general + how hes used within tng anyways god i

data....?

SPOT?

SPOT ARE YOU OKAY

THANK GOD THANK FUCKING GOD

OH THANK FUCKING GOD OH CHRIST IM GOING TO CRY NO SHUT UP. THIS CAT IS FIGHTING FOT ITS LIFE

i will also say going back its always so funny how they do that bit with like ahhh damn the starfleet officers cant have families bc im sure theyve touched upon it with riker too but also like. thats just what makes sisko the fucking best isntit . HAHAHAAHHAHAAH., GOT EM

thanks riker. swing your big dick aaround

also can i be honest i didnt care about enterprise d being destroyed. smirk. there i said it. i wept in search for spock i will say i will profess to that but that was like real thi wasn stop imr emeebring

MOVIE OVER?

[pwblogarchive]

April 2004

April 1, 2004

“hey heartbreaker, you'll never work in this town again”

I think someone is impersonating me online. Could be a joke. But if you talk to someone online and they say they are me, they aren't. I don't talk to anyone online. Texas is fun. We got some sick clandestine hoodies. They've got bats on the hoods and all. Sidenote: I love nickplan. Sorry my words don't have the same weight they usually have right now. Usually they feel stuck in my throat, today it feels okay inside my skin. Oh yeah chicagoland. We want to roadtest some of our new songs so we will be playing around unannounced on shows at really small venues in the next few months. If you snooze you lose. You never know what show we may play.

April 4, 2004

“we love life”

Texas was sex. Dallas being the most amazing. Its hot down here. We played with a band called DV8, this really young band (13-15). They were rad. The bassists bass was bigger than him. Me some rad kids in arkansas, they were starry-eyed and made me tongue-tied. I've been writing a lot lately. All my old charms and curses are back in full swing. I can't wait to get home. Well take these hearts and rename them dangerous and invincible. Well make them too hard to break.

Peterpan

April 7, 2004

“a man-made monster with every human emotion (clandestine explained 1)”

So a lot of people have been asking us about these hoodies and shirt with bats on them. It is not a clothing company. It is not a new band. When I was younger I had this same nightmare over and over again- so my friend tim biedron and I made a story of it (www.timbiedron.com to check out his art). The story is finished and we are waiting on some of the illustration. You may love it or hate it but its something that was stuck inside my head for a long time. We will be selling shirts and skatedecks online soon (www.clandestineindustries.com) and the story will be available this summer. Take the time to check it out if you get a chance.

Love peter

April 10, 2004

“ice age, heat wave cant complain”

i really like the new modest mouse cd. it's called good news for people who love bad news. purchase it.

April 11, 2004

“the moon has one third less gravity than your earth, i don't know if you can comprehend that”

im home. i love aqua teen hunger force. its hilarious. i wanted to let everyone know that if you haven't heard the point id suggest checking them out. a good mix of core and punk rock type stuff. i really really enjoy the hell out of them. www.thepointrock.com

still listening to modest mouse. still think you should get it. being home is nice. im full of food and really clean and im wearing my hood up. im way tired.

April 11, 2004

“I want to sleep on portraits painted as perfect as you”

Thanks for fun on tour. For the record for those in freeport- we had a little bit of fun with you. I will not ever drink. Its not my thing. So if you think there was more than water in that beer bottle, I have a bridge you might wanna buy too.

April 12, 2004

in response to a post on our messageboard, i want to say that i eat only cocoa crispies. i dont dig any other cereals.

April 14, 2004

“in case you're keeping score”

Being in a band is the ultimate friendship ruiner. Went to two shows tonight. In addition to all the smoke got to hang with: akas, beautiful mistake, dld, apo, senses fail and rufio. Being in a band is the best friendship maker. I am getting this awesome bass custom made, black with a red pick guard, no knobs, wired "on". I think it got me weird, so I dyed my hair red and black. Its sex or maybe not. I have 80 pages of lyrics to wade through. New songs soon. New love soon. Style update: I'm only gonna wear little polo tees with the collars up from now on. The clandestine webstore is almost up. I want to get "mom" tattoo for mothers day.

Peter

April 14, 2004

i just wanted to welcome the academy to the family. it's cool cause i've seen these guys go from the beginning and now we're here....

- petey

April 15, 2004

“who dares wins.”

i have been having such a rad time at home. but i must admit i haven't gotten used to sleeping with out hearing my friends breathing in hotel rooms. my bed doesn't feel the same. we leave again today. i am excited to see old friends. i am excited to see some bands too. the full clandestine website is going to launch on april 22 at www.clandestineindustries.com - we'll have some gear at the next couple of shows.

i was gonna post some pictures of my experiments with shaving and hair dye here. but i don't know how so go on over to: www.fueledbyramen.com/journal to see em.

love peterlewiskingstonwentz

i've found that liars always sing the loudest. heart in mouth, ego on sleeve. you've always got the right girl and the right line. i swear to god, take this mic and cross my heart and hope you die. i'm singing this one just flat of the key of love. liars always sing the loudest. the act is getting old but i'm sure all the fools will follow like vermin down the hole.

April 15, 2004

hey jerks. i got bored and dyed my hair red and black- oooh scary. when i am home i only wear sweatpants and don't shave. here's a look into the life of a loser:

make me say ugh nahnahnahnah

[image here]

there's that quarterback smile we all hate 

[image here]

born to lose 

[image here]

pretty emo bro, you could use this one to score on live journal 

[image here]

and here's the after shaved and ready to do some stagedives. new jersey or bust. 

[image here]

this may in fact be photo evidence that i am gay 

[image here]

now that we have that out of the way. the full clandestine site should launch on april 22. we'll be selling some gear at skateandsurf and at a couple of these shows on the way out. tour never ends. for real go and listen to my friend ben's band, it's called Not Enough Gold. they smoke. our tour this summer is gonna be called "believers never die" get into it. sorry for all the pictures, this ain't my space biatch, send me some.

1 2 3 L U V!

- petey

April 26, 2004

so much has been going on. my head has been moving too fast, i can't catch up. clandestineindustries.com is up.

i've got a picture from skate and surf in new jersey. we will have more soon, excuse the quality. you can see how insane this room was.

[image here]

- petey

[blackvail22]

9/22/23 — 1:20am

i hate wanting to be productive in the middle of the night. i was tired all day tdy, and now i just want to do something productive. no!!! i work earlier than usual tomorrow!!!!

im doing my skincare now... i wore makeup tdy so i have no choice but to do it 🤯

im tired still but i dont want to sleep. i feel like i havent been productive enough tdy even though i went to 3 different appointments and within the 2 hours before work i cleaned my bathroom sink (that was incredibly disgusting, i am not exaggerating. no one has cleaned it in like a little over a year. my dad shaves his face there whenever it gets like 5 inches long and doesnt clean the hair out of the sink/on the counter. its gross.), made ramen (it wasnt v good).... at work i walked around almost the whole 6 hours. my feet hurt so!! bad!! after i work. it happens every time. it doesnt help that when i fell down my stairs, my "sprained" foot didnt heal properly. i also hurt my hand at work and have not seen a doctor .... im ngl im like a mess and if i tell anyone abt this theyll tell me its because im fat and need to lose weight WE GET IT. I KNOW. IM TRYING, AND JUST BECAUSE I AM DOESNT MEAN THAT I CANT HAVE SMTH WRONG WITH ME?????

anyways

im tired. like mentally and physically. i had counseling tdy and i told her everything and the time still wasnt full. she shared some things abt her life recently... still didnt fill the time. she didnt respond much at all, but she's grieving, so i understand

im not telling anyone except u and my digital diary about my situation with my ex... i need to stop complaining to people abt him and making it everyones problem when its really my fault i keep letting him back in my life. its bad! ive literally had dreams where he did that *thing* but like in an extremely worse way, and i told myself that i just had to live with it, that i have to get used to it. and, i mean, i guess i do... if i can *** ***** then he can do whatever.

im not even with him... just flirting heavily. he picks up on it, i think so, anyway....

im tired

i saw that u updated ur music playlist you sent to me recently ! so heres a song for u in return

2:51am

idk why it pisses me off so bad but when b says shes ugly it makes me so angry. "why cant i be like the pretty girls?" she is the definition of a pretty girl... she may not see it because people were mean to her growing up but its like... ive cried SO much because of how pretty she is. my parents call her the pretty girl, people at school say shes pretty all the time... it just makes me so upset that someone as pretty as her cant see it. and i wish she could, honestly.

and i hate that this makes me so angry. i have so much envy that it rips me apart every second of the day, and i hate it!!!!! im the fat, ugly friend, and i always felt bad for her being friends with me. she says that im one of the prettiest ppl she knows.... if that were true, would she have deleted all the photos of me off of her phone? who knows. and the fact that people compliment her all the time at school and in public should say A LOT about how pretty she is. it happens all the time! and i mean all the time. maybe she doesnt think it was genuine or she forgets? idk... i think the last time a stranger complimented my appearance was a year and a half ago at a taco bell drive thru. the last time i was called pretty (besides when my mom says it) was at leastt 6 months ago. im like distraught because she is literally so beautiful fuck

this is going to make me cry myself to sleep because i cant say any of this to her because this is really just unhealthy of me, like the envy and making me seem like the victim. it just makes me so upset that everyone thinks shes pretty but herself

yeah im def crying myself to sleep gn i work in 11hrs which sounds like a long time from now but i havent slept yet lol

3:16am

ok i lied i messaged her and said "i saw you commented "i wish i was one of the pretty girls" on a tiktok, and i really need you to know that you are the pretty girl. youre so incredibly beautiful not only on the outside but the inside too... it can be rare to find someone like that. i hope youre able to see yourself through my eyes someday and see yourself for what you truly are—beautiful"

i hope it doesnt come off weird

ok i cried and messaged her i should rlly just sleep now

[ne0nlightzz]

CW: oddly aggressive self-directed criticism cuz im a dumbass with temper issues and lack of responsibility regarding my writing? also just a ranty rant cuz im kinda stressed out over random shitz- idk if this needs cw but here we go- also does this count as a progress update? again i dunno-

so i should be writing or at least working on requests- but after writing a whole chapter 5 of DFTS [the creepypasta x ftm!reader ive been writing] to the point that only touch ups, editing and double checking for major grammar/spelling errors was needed but then deciding i didn't like how it was written and felt it was a bit to cliché i went and deleted nearly the whole chapter [when it wasn't exactly that bad nor did it mess with/alter the plot that much and was fine since its just a filler chapter anyway] and decided to basically start from scratch.

normally this isn't that big of a deal, ive done it plenty of times with this story because not only do i want others to like it and enjoy the story, i also want to personally like it and enjoy writing the story, so again not really that big of a deal right? yeah that would be if i didn't procrastinate and put it off for like FOUR+ FREAKIN MONTHS- ive been working on that part little by little for like over four months because i went through a writer's block n health issues and family issues and setbacks cuz my life is just a total shitshow but i just deleted four+ months of on and off work cuz i didn't like it- AND IM SUPPOSED TO POST MONTHLY- and ykw i don't have time for a dumb lil personal dislike of a mostly decent FILLER CHAPTER- [not even a super important chapter!!] cuz i have school shit to do and requests to write and a deadline for the next part of another story ive been writing [that i have to get written, edited and posted before october cuz once its october it'll be a year since i update and whenever i update a year later i always lose hope for the story-].

i lost where i was going with this rant but im highly considering closing requests until i can get what is in my inbox written and posted along with at least one of my other works updated- i dunno i might just go try to figure out how to scene kid/emo-fy my furby and see if thats less stressful- [i say as i got mad paint a shelf last week- even simple projects are driving me insane and aren't going well- n imma stop ranting now cuz omfg why did i type so much- ALSO REQS ARENT ACTUALLY CLOSED- IF I CLOSE REQS I WILL MAKE THAT ITS OWN POST-]

[btw nothing negative or anything towards anyone whos sent reqs, i love getting them n they make me happy and usually help motivate me! im just stressed with myself for procrastinating so much with writing and pushing it all off for so long and also for not trying to push through that writers block sooner- also just with school cuz i skipped out over the summer which was supposed to be used as time for me to catch up and also just stressed and angry as my shitshow of a life for never calming down or giving me or my family a break, like i haven't solidly worked on a hobby and enjoyed it in a while- mk imma stop the dumb rant again cuz i need to stop and go calm the hell down and take my focus off of writing n all for a lil bit-]

[softbinu]

hello i’m in a very moonbin mood <3 i’m going through my bin feels <3 i love bin <3 i’m perhaps crying <3 he !! <3 i love he <3 !!!!!!

[aizawaorkuroo]

Seek the Light

Ship: Ukai Keishin x f!reader

Rated: Explicit

Word Count: 8.4K

Summary: Back home after losing your job, you wander into a convenience store not realizing you would see a familiar face.

Warnings: Young Ukai’s a bitch, Language, Biting, Vaginal Fingering, Size Kink (I know this man has a bick dick I know he does), Overstimulation, Creampie, Unprotected Sex, Dom!Ukai

AN: first haikyuu fic haha and first time writing ukai so im still figuring it out! This one got away from me gsfda and the conflict resolved easily cause its my fic and i make the rules tgerfw

________________________

The dipping summer sun casts shadows across the buildings, while painting the clouds a pretty gold. Memories of childhood and youth flood into you, creating a fondness in your heart. Yes, Miyagi was nice. It would be nicer if you didn’t have to move back home after losing your job in Tokyo. You can tell yourself it’s temporary all you want, but it’s embarrassing. Failing is embarrassing.

You sigh, realizing you should probably head back home before it gets too dark. Despite the setting sun, the air has yet to cool off, and you find that your walk has left your throat parched. You glance around, smiling as you spot a convenience store. Nice.

You smile as the air conditioning hits your skin. You make a beeline for a bottled tea, already excited for the refreshing taste. You hum happily as your eyes tilt up to the man behind the register. His eyes are glued to an issue of something, and a cigarette dangles from his lips. Ukai Keishin.

You feel your heart stutter as you watch your best friend from high school read. His hair is long and blonde now, and it just makes sense. He’s handsome, you realize. You always thought he was cute in high school, but he’s a man now.

“No fucking way,” you breathe out, drawing the gaze of the man sitting behind the counter. His eyes widen, recognition clear as day in them.

“Y/N?” His voice is unusually quiet, and his eyes bore into yours, as if you would disappear again if he looked away. Guilt swells uncomfortably in your stomach. You hadn’t talked to him in years. You moved away, and you lost touch with your high school friends, including him. Especially him. He slowly stands to look at you, putting what he was reading down and shoving his cigarette into an ashtray.

Yes, you had been gone for awhile, and yes, the two of you hadn’t talked. But you were both here now, and a second chance has been given to you, wrapped up like a present in the form of a stunned employee at a convenience store.

“Ukai! I forgot this was your mom’s place!” you yell excitedly, rushing behind the counter to trap him in a tight hug. He huffs against you, tensing, before awkwardly wrapping his arms around you.

“What the hell are you doing here?” His words stir something hot and sticky in you, and you push away from him, sheepishly smiling.

“I lost my job and couldn’t find another one in time, and uh, here I am.” Your nose scrunches up at the thought of your tiny, Tokyo apartment that you would never return to.

“No shit, huh? Are you back with your parents?” Your shoulders sag and you nod, pursing your lips.

“Yea, but what have you been up to?” you ask, eager to learn more about your old friend.

“Y’know, working here, hanging out with Shimada and Takinoue. I’ve also been coaching Karasuno’s volleyball team. They’ll sometimes stop by.”

“Oh that’s absolutely perfect,” you laugh. “My volleyball boys never grew up, huh?” He rolls his eyes at you, crossing his arms in feigned annoyance. You hold your hands up in peace, trying to suppress the giggle that’s bubbling in your chest.

“Well, you clearly grew up,” you offer, letting your eyes trail over him. His eyes widen again, and a faint blush covers his cheeks, so soft you almost don’t notice it. “But you’re still reading the same shit.” He lightly punches your arm, and you stick your tongue out at him.

“Anyways, the four of us should get dinner sometime.” You cock your head to the side, trying to gauge his reaction. He snorts and rolls his eyes at you, but there’s a small smile on his face. That's promising, you muse to yourself.

“Yea, that sounds good. And I’m sure Shimada and Takinoue will say yes. I can text you when we’re able to.” He pauses, and his eyes drop to the ground. Your stomach twists into knots as he awkwardly rubs the back of his neck. “Is your number still the same?” It’s an innocent question, and yet you feel like the floor has dropped from beneath you, leaving you unbalanced.

“Uh, yeah,” you murmur, feeling guilty when he nods and presses his lips into a thin line.

“It was good seeing you, Y/N. I’ll text you.” You nod, slowly backing up to the door. You give him a small wave before pushing the door open, stepping back out into the warm air. Your body moves on autopilot while your brain goes into overdrive as you ponder how you can properly mend the bridge between you two.

It’s only when you’re halfway home that you realize you forgot your tea.

________________________

When Ukai texts you, you can’t help but to cringe at the past messages that were left unanswered. Random little texts, asking about your day, how’s Tokyo, updating you on everyone back home. You had meant to answer them, but you just couldn’t. You could pinpoint the moment you stopped answering his messages, and you shudder, remembering how harsh he had sounded over the phone. Not that you had been any kinder. After that night, his texts trickled in slower and slower, until they ended completely.

You inhale sharply, closing your eyes. But you’re back now, and he’s texting you again. You blink your eyes open, rereading his message.

Hey! How does Saturday at 8 work?

Taking a shaky breath you quickly type out a response that you hope isn’t too eager.

That sounds great! Is that one place with the great hiyashi chuka place still open?

The four of you used to eat there in the summertime, feasting on cold ramen and an assortment of toppings. Takinoue used to flirt with the waitress, who remained unimpressed throughout the years. You smile fondly at the memory, excited to see everyone again. Your phone vibrates, pulling you from your thoughts.

Yea and it’s still the only hiyashi chuka place in town

You hum at his message, thinking of how long the four of you used to wait while the summer sun blazed down, and sometimes Kimi would go with you. She had a massive crush on Shimada, one that left her helpless to your and Takinoue’s teasing. Your phone buzzes again, and you look down, slightly surprised at the second message.

I’m excited to see you again.

That was promising indeed.

And yet you can’t help the way butterflies terrorize your stomach as you stand outside the old restaurant. Part of you wants to turn around and walk home; another part of you wants to throw up. You inhale sharply, steeling yourself, and you walk through the door.

It’s just like you remember, and you feel more at ease. You know this place, and these are your friends. There was no reason to worry. But still…

Your eyes flash across the room, before zeroing in on your usual table. You grin widely at Takinoue who is waving you down. Shimada sits next to him, smiling softly as you approach. Immediately, Takinoue gives you a bear hug, making you giggle.

“It’s been way too long,” he whines before letting you go. Shimada rolls his eyes, offering you a small wave. You slip into the empty seat next to Ukai, greeting him quietly. He nods, a small smirk tugging at his lips. The nerves that had been eating away at you dissipate immediately. The conversation flows easy, as if you never left. And when the hiyashi chuka is brought out, your mouth waters just like it used to.

“I’m telling you, it’s not as good anywhere else,” you bemoan. Shimada laughs at that, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“I think that’s nostalgia talking.” You stick your tongue out before shoveling noodles back into your mouth. Ukai snorts, before taking a sip of his beer. Something warm and soft builds up in your heart, spilling out into your entire body.

Happily full of noodles, you settle back against your chair, trying to ignore the way Ukai’s arm rests against the back of your chair. His touch is feather light, but the warmth seeps into you. You missed this, you missed this, you missed him.

When the four of you are standing outside, you shift on your feet, not wanting to have to say goodbye again.

“We should get drinks sometime,” you say to no one in particular. Takinoue slings an arm over your shoulder and his grin is so wide that alone almost makes you laugh.

“Ah yeah! Now you’re talking, Y/N!”

“That is something we can all do together now,” Ukai mumbles, fishing out a cigarette and a lighter from his pocket.

“Then it’s settled,” you chirp happily, “We’ll meet up for drinks next weekend, if that’s okay with you guys.” Ukai’s eyebrows pinch together in thought, and he slowly nods.

“That should work.” You pull away from Takinoue, choosing to wrap an arm around Ukai’s waist, and pulling yourself flush against him.

“Perfect! It’ll be nice to get out of the house before I move into my new apartment.” Ukai rolls his eyes, but drapes his arm across your shoulders anyways. You try not to notice the way his thumb lightly strokes your arm.

________________________

The lights in the bar are dim, and you’re sipping on a lemon sour, nestled into the booth next to Ukai. Beers litter the table, as well as small dishes of food, and some shots you all have yet to drink. Takinoue’s cackle barrels through the air as you offer up another idea.

“No, I’m serious! We could all get dinner! I’m sure my parents would be happy to see you guys again.” Ukai scoffs, crossing his arms and fixing you with a pointed look.

“Please, your parents hate us,” he grumbles. A laugh bubbles through you, and you shake your head.

“They did not!” you promise, but your words sound hollow even to yourself.

Takinoue’s eyebrow quirks up in disbelief. Your lips twist into a grimace, memories of your parents looking tired whenever the boys dropped you off at home. “Okay, maybe they did, but ONLY when my grades would start slipping.” Shimada nods at your words.

“Yea, that sounds right,” he says solemnly. You pout at his calm and unsurprised tone.

“I promise they loved you guys. Just like I know your granddad loved me,” you giggle, poking at Ukai’s side. He rolls his eyes, and he downs his shot.

“Please, like that man likes anyone,” he grumbles. You stick your tongue out at him, and punch his arm lightly.

“Alright, but I got you through high school, so he has to like me” you counter, mouth twisting into a smirk. Ukai glares at you, memories of late night study sessions, and rushed homework help before class flood his mind. His shoulders sag, and he lets out a sigh.

“That’s fair I guess. Gotta piss. I’ll be back.” He pushes out of the booth, leaving you with Takinoue and Shimada. Shimada smiles softly, before fixing his gaze on you.

“Kimi was in Tokyo too, right? Have you seen her at all?” he asks. You grin, taking a sip of your drink.

“Yea, we actually got lunch the day before I moved.” You pause, eyeing him carefully before continuing. “Shimada, did you know she had the biggest crush on you in high school?” He blushes a bright crimson, choking on his drink as Takinoue cackles.

“Yea, dumbass. It was obvious.” Shimada glares at him, nursing his beer.

“Well, I clearly didn’t know. And no one thought to tell me?” You shrugged, shooting him an apologetic smile. Takinoue punches him arm affectionately, before his eyes settle on you, full of humor and mirth.

“Speaking of crushes, I was wondering how Ukai would be since you got back,” Takinoue laughs.

“What?” Despite the drinks you’ve had, you feel sober, something cold slinking down your back.

“He was head over heels for you back in the day,” Takinoue’s laughs die down, but he doesn’t seem to notice the way you freeze. Shimada, on the other hand, does, and he cocks his head to the side, monitoring your response.

You sputter, words locked in your throat. What they hopefully don’t know is that you had a massive crush on him too, and it’s only resurfaced violently since seeing him again. Even after what had happened. And yet that cold feeling heats up into something syrupy in the pit of your stomach.

“Well that’s news to me,” you say softly. “Guess I fucked it all up, huh?” Shimada and Takinoue exchange a glance, and you’re sure one of them is gonna say something, but when Ukai slips back into the booth that door shuts, locking their words on the other side.

“What’d you fuck up?” he asks, taking a swig of the beer he had left on the table.

“Ah you know, the usual. My life in Tokyo. And now I’m back with my parents. I did find a job though.” Shimada’s brows furrow, but he says nothing. Ukai hums, his thigh jostling against yours.

“Aren't you at your new place yet?” Your face twists in annoyance, and your head hits the back of the booth.

“I’m gonna have to stay with my parents for a few more days because a pipe apparently burst in my apartment. But I’m going to lose it. I can’t live with them anymore. Not at my age…” you trail off, lost in your thoughts.

“Stay with me. Until you can move in.” 

Ukai’s voice cuts through the noisy bar, and you open your mouth stupidly, no words coming out. He stares back at you, making the butterflies that had been dormant for awhile snap back to life inside of you. He scratches at the side of his face, making pathetic attempts to backtrack. “I mean you don’t have to, and I won’t be there for a bit cause of training camp-”

“No, that sounds good.” You nod at him, an easy smile spreading across your face. “Yea, that sounds good.” His eyes lock onto yours, something dark and undefinable in them. Neither of you notice the coy look Shimada and Takinoue share.

________________________

The hot water streams around you, and you shut your eyes, relishing the way it feels on your skin. You had a long day at your new job, and the approaching weekend was the only thing keeping you going. Well, that and the fact that you were currently in Ukai’s shower.

He had been kind enough to offer you a place to stay, and already your thoughts are starting to drift to darker places. You had harbored a crush on him when you were younger, but you haven’t seen him in years. And yet the way he looked at you made your stomach drop.

You turn the water off, the cold air plucking at your skin and making you shiver. You wrap a towel around yourself, and dry off quickly, trying to forget about the ache in between your legs. It doesn’t work, but you pull on a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt anyways. You could at least pretend it worked.

Ukai’s apartment was exactly what you expected. The walls were littered with posters, books lay all over the ground, and there was a volleyball by the TV. He had rubbed the back of his neck, almost embarrassed when you first got there.

“It’s, uh, not much. Probably should’ve thought about that before I offered, but make yourself at home,” he mutters.

You had reassured him it was more than enough. You were just grateful to be out of your parents' house. You pad over to his spot near the tv, kneeling next to him. He eyes you from his peripheral, not looking directly at you. Nonetheless, it makes you shiver.

“Where should I sleep?” you ask, playing with the hem of his shirt. He nods his head back to the bed, and you flush.

“I can’t take your bed,” you sputter, stomach flipping. He rolls his eyes, a sharp smirk pulling at his lips.

“I gotta leave in the middle of the fucking night for training camp, remember? Take the bed.” His tone leaves no room for any argument, and you nod shyly, before shuffling over to his bed. He refocuses on the game he was watching as you pull the covers around you.

But you can’t sleep. Not when Ukai is so close to you. You flip onto your stomach and huff. He glances at you from over his shoulder and rolls his eyes. He shifts to the side, allowing you to watch the game from your vantage point.

You recognize the Karasuno uniforms, and something syrupy and nostalgic floods your veins. This must be the new team. The two of you stay quiet, the two of you lost in your own thoughts.

It’s only when the noise from the TV stops that you’re jolted back to reality. Ukai’s hand grips the remote tightly, face screwed up unpleasantly.

“Why did you stop talking to me?”

The words ring around his apartment, crystalizing into the air, becoming frigid and uncomfortable. You squeeze your eyes shut, letting your head rest against his pillow. When you open them again, he’s turned towards you, brows pinched and mouth twisted into a grimace.

“I didn’t-” you cut yourself off, pushing yourself up to your knees. “I didn’t mean to.” You hold a hand up to him, stopping his oncoming argument. “I wanted to, and I wanted to pretend like everything was okay, but how could I?” His frown deepens, but he stays silent, memories seeping uncomfortably into the air.

“Keishin,” you hissed into the phone. “Let it go.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? How could you be so stupid?” Your stomach drops at his words, but more than anything, you’re upset.

“I am not the stupid one. I’m the one who made it out of Miyagi. I’m the one who’s going to college.” You hear him inhale sharply, and you can practically imagine the way his eyes are narrowed right now.

“Right, right, right. And you’re also the one who’s sleeping with some asshole, who is way too old for you, and he’s just gonna forget you once he’s bored! If that’s not what a stupid little girl does, you tell me what it is! I’m trying to watch out for you!” he practically yells. You feel the oncoming tears sting the back of your eyes, but there’s something red-hot pushing you forward.

“Fuck you, Ukai. I actually found someone who likes me for once, you have to ruin it. I’m not a kid. You don’t know shit about my life here, and you hate it. If you cared so much, you could’ve asked me to stay. Fuck you.” He swears angrily at you, before the line drops. You stare at your phone, waves of nausea passing over you.

A week later he sends you a text, complaining about his grandfather, and telling you about something stupid Takinoue did. You couldn’t bring yourself to respond. His texts eventually slowed down, until he didn’t text you at all.

You shudder slightly at the memory, letting your eyes drop to the floor.

“You acted like nothing had happened, but I was still mad, and by the time I had calmed down, I thought you would hate me for not talking to you.” You wrap your arms around yourself, chewing on your lip. “And you were right by the way, about that guy,” you spit out. “The second someone prettier came along, he dropped me.”

When you flick your eyes up, Ukai’s jaw is tense, his brows furrowed. You dig your nails into your arm, inhaling sharply.

“Fuck, I wish I had been wrong,” he seethes. Your eyes widen, not expecting him to say that. In all honesty, you weren’t sure what you had expected him to say. “You deserve the world, Y/N. More than that piece of shit. More than Miyagi.” His words are colored with bitterness that makes your stomach curdle.

“That’s why I could never ask you to stay. You were supposed to get out of here.” Ukai’s gaze bores into you, the intensity of it giving you whiplash. Your heart melts at his words, and you can’t help but to feel regret for not trying to work things out back in the day.

“And I ended up back here anyways,” you mutter.

“Well, Miyagi has some perks,” he laughs, an easy smirk tugging at his mouth. You cock your head to the side, snorting in disbelief.

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“It’s got you now,” Ukai says lazily, while stretching his arms above his head.

Your heart swells in your chest, and you lunge towards him, wrapping your arms around him. He’s tense beneath you, but relaxes under your soft touches.

“I missed you, Kei,” you say gently. His arms drop to hold you to him, eyes closing as he basks in your attention.

“I’m sorry for what happened, and I’m sorry I tried to pretend like nothing happened. I’m pissed that you weren’t in my life, but that was my fault. And now that you’re here...don’t think you’re escaping that easy again.” You nod, and something hot stings the back of your eyes.

“I’m not,” you say gently. “I’m not gonna disappear again. I promise. You’re my best friend, Keishin. I missed you.”

“Okay. Now get some sleep.” His arms loosen around you, and you slump away from him. As you shift back into the bed, Ukai faces the TV, playing it and lowering the volume until it’s just white noise to your sleepy mind. With that, you lie down again, letting your eyes shut and the warmth of sleep overtake you.

Ukai is drawn back into the game, but your words linger in the air. You’re my best friend, Keishin. I missed you. He glances back at you, bitterness eating away at his stomach. He wants to be more than just your best friend. 

He fixes his gaze on the TV, trying to shove those thoughts somewhere deep and dark. Eventually, when he looks at the time, he scowls realizing he’s gotta head out now. Letting out a sigh, he turns to face you again.

His heart tugs at how you’re curled up in his bed so sweetly. Guilt settles in his stomach at the thought of waking you at this hour, but he had to make sure you would be okay. His hand hovers above your shoulder, and he watches the steady rise and fall of your chest. You belong here. With him. He shakes his head, banishing the thought. Ukai gently shakes you, watching as you rub your eyes and blink sluggishly at him.

“Sorry to wake you, but I’m heading out for the camp now. The keys are on the counter. Stay as long as you need to, just make sure to lock up.” You hum at his words, nestling back into his pillow and shutting your eyes.

“Okay, Keishin. Love you. Have fun,” you murmur, before drifting back to sleep. He inhales sharply, eyes boring into your sleeping face. He scoffs to himself, shaking his head. You probably wouldn’t even remember you said that when you woke up. And yet…

Ukai shifts on his knees closer to your sleeping form. He ducks down, letting his lips hover over your forehead. He gently kisses your temple, while simultaneously trying to squash the warm feelings that flow through him. He pulls away quickly, the small peck only lasting a second or two, but his lips burn now, and all he wants to do is curl around you and hold you in his arms.

The thought rushes through him like cold water, and he straightens away from you, trying to ignore the way his heart thuds. Ukai’s lips twist into a frown, and he rises, grabbing his bag and quietly walking out the door.

________________________

The next few days are quiet as you go to work. It feels weird to stay at Ukai’s by yourself, but you have to admit that a weight has been lifted since the first night. It was like you could finally move forward in your friendship, the guilt evaporating and letting you fall back into a normal crush.

The evening you’re able to move into your apartment, it’s windier than you thought it would be. You didn’t mean to steal one of his hoodies, but you know he has a few pairs of the orange one. You had seen them in his closet. You slip the orange hoodie on, clutching the fabric to you. It’s warm, enough to protect you from the unusually powerful wind. You shut your eyes and take a deep breath; it smells like him. The thought makes you shudder.

You keep the hoodie on, promising to leave it in Ukai's apartment when you make your last trip in between. But when the moment comes, you can’t bring yourself to take the garment off. When you slip into bed in an unfamiliar place that night, his hoodie brings you comfort. As your eyes shut, you promised that you would return it the next day, when he texted you for his key.

Except you didn’t. You held onto his hoodie for two weeks. By the time you return it, it has already stopped smelling like him. And now, Ukai’s blinking at you from the doorframe of his apartment, confusion pulling at his eyebrows.

His hair is wet, hanging limply against his head, his normal headband nowhere to be seen. A towel hangs around his neck, and there’s an unlit cigarette in between his lips. You blink up at him blankly, trying to resist the urge to run your fingers through his hair.

“Y/N, what are you doing here?” He cocks his head to the side, eyes trailing over your face curiously.

“I, um, came to drop this off.” You hold his hoodie to your chest, clutching it tightly in your hands. “But I probably should’ve told you I was coming.” His gaze is glued to the garment your holding, and the silence hangs in between you. Ukai flicks his eyes back to yours, something deep and dark brewing in them. You shift nervously under his gaze, opening your mouth as you hesitantly explain yourself.

“I borrowed it. When I was staying here. Just took me a while to drop it back off,” you mumble, feeling embarrassed.

“Keep it.” His voice is warm and steady in the air, making your spine tingle. Your hands drop from your chest, hoodie still clenched tightly.

“Oh. Okay.” Your mouth feels heavy, the words sticking to your tongue like molasses. “I guess I’ll head home. Thanks.” You start to turn away, when his hand shoots out, latching onto your wrist.

“You just got here.” His touch stings you, burning into your skin in a way that makes you crave more. You slowly, and weakly, you nod at him, letting him guide you inside his apartment.

“So you borrowed my hoodie, huh?” He smirks at you, eyes gleaming at the way you nervously sit at the edge of his futon.

“Yea, I was running out the door and it was colder than I thought, so I just grabbed it.” Your hands grip the fabric tightly, before you put the hoodie on the bed next to you. Ukai cocks his head to the side, his sharp smirk never leaving his face. “But it took me a while to return because, well…” He flops down onto the ground in front of you, resting his chin in his hand.

“Because it smelled like you,” you mumble, feeling butterflies slip into your veins. Ukai’s eyes widen for a split second, and he plucks the unlit cigarette from his mouth, throwing it to the side.

“Huh, no shit.” His words are colored in disbelief, but his gaze is unwavering, sending a small shiver down your spine. He shifts forward, pushing into your personal space until his face is right in front of yours.

“If I’m reading this wrong, you gotta let me know.” The frail dam that had been holding your emotions in place splinters, leaving your mind reeling. But one thing was sure: it was impossible to deny how you felt.

“You’re not,” you manage to sputter out. “You’re not reading it wrong.” He hums in satisfaction, eyes trailing over your face.

Ukai surges forward, and his lips are warm and rough against yours, and he steals your breath away immediately. A hand gently holds your face to his, the other wrapped around your waist, pulling you against him. Tentatively, you twist your fingers into his hair, and he groans against you. He pulls away from your lips, leaving you chasing after him. He pants against you, eyes dark and unreadable.

“Been wanting to do this for years,” he mutters, looking at you intensely.

“What took you so long?” He rolls his eyes, leaving sharp kisses down your neck.

“Too scared that I would push you away, and I did that anyways.” You pout at his words, tugging him up by his hair.

“I’m not going away again, and there’s nothing you could do to make me” you murmur, leaning forward to kiss him. His tongue prods at your lips, and you open your mouth obediently, letting him explore. Ukai’s hands are warm on your waist, squeezing the flesh that’s there. He pulls you onto his lap, shifting his legs under you so you’re flush against him.

“You good?” you ask in between kisses, scratching his scalp. His hips rock against you, and he pulls back to smirk at you.

“I’m more than good, baby.” Grinning, you meet his mouth again, letting your hips grind against him. His warm hands wander up and down your body, setting your skin on fire. They rest on your waist under your shirt, and his fingers tap at the flesh there. You hum happily, before leaning away and pulling off your shirt and tossing it behind you. Ukai freezes, eyes hungrily taking in the newly exposed skin. You flush as his hands start to trail upwards, ghosting over your skin.

You dip forward to kiss him again, and his hands reach around to fumble with your bra. You smile against his lips as he struggles, but the second it’s off, his hands are kneading your breasts.

“What are you smiling about?” he mutters against your lips, before pinching one of your nipples. You pull back and inhale sharply, biting your lip before tugging at his shirt.

“Not fair that yours is still on, Keishin,” you whine. He rolls his eyes, and pushes you off of his lap, letting you fall against the futon. Ukai strips quickly, a sharp grin on his face making you flush. He crawls forward, caging you in between his arms. His hips settle in between your thighs, and you can feel his erection through his boxers.

When he looks at you, his hair flops down. You lift your hand, running your fingers through it. He leans into your touch, grinning before bending down to kiss you. His lips are warm against you, and he doesn’t waste any time, attacking your jawline and neck with sharp, biting kisses. You card your hands through his hair, eyes fluttering shut. His kisses switch into something more intense, and you gasp, eyes fluttering open as small bites litter your neck.

“Ukai,” you moan, fingers tightening in his hair. He leaves little marks until he reaches your chest. His tongue swirls around a nipple, fingers pinching the other. The small sparks of pleasure go straight to your pussy, and your hips shift underneath Ukai, making him groan.

His mouth is hot and relentless on you, and your nipples ache from the attention. His teeth lightly bite down on your breast, not hard enough to leave a mark, but enough to make your eyes fly open.

“Keishin!” you squeal. He chuckles before letting his tongue run over were he just bit.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, not really meaning it, and he continues his path down. When he reaches the waist of your shorts, his eyes find yours, waiting. Biting the inside of your cheek, you shift your hips up, and Ukai grips the fabric, tugging down both your shorts and your underwear. His eyes focus on your exposed pussy, making note of how it’s already wet.

“Quit staring,” you complain, embarrassment flooding your system. He smirks down at you, using his finger to trail up and down your already soaking slit.

“So pretty and wet…” he mumbles. Your hips squirm underneath him, and his finger travels to circle your sensitive clit. You whine at the jolts of pleasure, making him smirk. His finger dips down, and he pushes it in gently. He thumbs at your clit, eyes flicking in between your face and your greedy pussy. Your tug at his hair, rotating your hips in time with his gentle thrusts.

“Keishin, more please,” you whine, making him chuckle. He slips another finger in, stretching you out. Your hands leave his hair to pinch at your nipples. Ukai’s head dips down to lightly bite the inside of your thigh, making you jolt. When he pushes in a third finger, you moan loudly, throwing your head back against the pillow. Something white-hot and foreboding pokes at the edges of your mind, threatening to spill over.

“I’m gonna cum, Kei,” you warn, eyes fluttering shut. His fingers curl inside of you, thumb still relentless on your clit.

“Open your eyes, Y/N.” His voice leaves no room for any argument, and you force them to open, watching as his fingers continue to pump into you. “Cum for me, baby.” He leans down again, eyes fixed on yours, and he bites the inside of your other thigh, and the pain combines with the pleasure, catapulting you over the edge.

You writhe and thrash against him, hips bucking up against his fingers. Ukai’s laugh fills the room, and he continues to move his fingers, letting you ride out your orgasm. When he finally pulls his hand away, you whimper from the loss. He presses a kiss to your hip before flipping you over.

You hear him shuffle, and you glance over your shoulder and see him kneeling behind you, boxers finally off. Excitement and arousal pool inside of you, and you squirm as his hands massage your ass.

“You’re big,” you murmur, making him laugh. He’s thick and long enough that you know it’ll feel good. But even then, you can’t help but wonder if he’ll actually fit. You flush facing forward again, but he leans down to press kisses to your spine.

“You good to keep going?” he asks in between each peck. You nod, letting your fingers dig into the sheets by your head.

“I’ve been thinking about this for years,” he groans, making you flush. His fingers dig into your ass, massaging the flesh. You squirm underneath him, feeling yourself get wetter under his touch. Ukai runs the head of his cock up and down your slit, and you inhale sharply, overcome with the desire to see his face.

“Wait!” you cry out, throwing an arm back to grab his arm. Immediately, he pulls away from you and freezes.

“What’s wrong are you okay? Do you wanna stop?” Panic colors his voice, and you shake your head before rolling over onto you back.

“I, uh, I just wanted to see you,” you mumble, feeling shy. Ukai barks out a laugh and smirks down at you, one of his hands moving to stroke your thigh affectionately.

“Fair enough. There’s always next time.” His predatory grin makes your cunt clench, and you reach up, gesturing for him to lean down. He cocks his head to the side, hair tilting with it.

“What is it you want?” You flush, letting your gaze go past his shoulder.

“A kiss.” His eyes light up, and he leans down, letting his lips ghost against yours. You push up, meeting his lips, and he chuckles. Ukai ruts his hips against you, letting his cock slide in between your soaking folds.

“Keishin, quit teasing me,” you whine. He rolls his eyes before pushing away, resting on his knees.

“Wanna watch your little pussy try to take me,” he explains, letting the head of his cock gently push into you. Your face contorts at the breach, and you wring your hands in the sheets. He whispers sweet words, eyes glued to your flutter pussy. He slowly rocks his hips forward, watching as he sinks in another inch.

You let out a choked moan, his slow movements emphasizing his size. His eyes snap up to your face, letting his hands squeeze your waist.

“Your sweet little cunt feels so good already,” he groans. Your hands tug at the sheets as you try not to squirm. But it feels nearly impossible with how red-hot his cock feels inside of you.

You preen under Ukai’s attention, his hands massaging your flesh as your pussy tries to relax around his thick length.

“So hot and tight.” His words shake as his eyes trail down your body to watch your pussy split around him as he inches in.

“You’re too big,” you keen, tears prickling in the corners of your eyes at the intense stretch, and nonetheless, the thought adds fuel to the fire in your belly, and your pussy clenches down harder on his cock. His thumb strokes delicate circles into your hip, and he smirks down at you.

“Yea, and the thought has you squeezing around my cock, huh? That’s pretty messed up.” You flush at his words, embarrassment coursing through your veins. You turn your head to the side, wanting to escape his intense gaze. Keishin leans forward, rocking his hips and pushing his cock slowly into you until he bottoms out. You let out a pathetic whine, covering your face with your hands

“Don’t get shy now, baby,” he coos, batting at your hands, which flop above your head. “I think it’s cute how tight you are around me. I’m just too big? Is that it, baby?” You moan, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him towards you. He chuckles as you bury face into the crook of his neck. Tentatively, Ukai slowly pulls out, every ridge and vein dragging deliciously against your walls. When he pushes back in, you groan against his skin, and your hands travel up and down the smooth expanse of his back, your nails leaving red lines.

His hand snakes in-between the two of you, and a calloused finger expertly traces patterns onto your clit. You moan loudly, and your body writhes against him. Ukai pulls away from you, and a cruel grin sprawls out onto his face.

“Are you gonna cum? Already?” You nod, pathetically bucking your hips against him still. “We’ve barely started,” he taunts.

“I can’t help it,” you choke out, nerves feeling overwhelmed by sensations. He hums at your words, licking his lips as he eyes your body.

“Okay. It’s okay. Do you wanna be good for me?” he gently asks. You squirm beneath him, hands gripping his biceps, and you nod your head.

“I wanna be good for you, Keishin,” you cry out, the walls of your cunt fluttering around his thick cock. “I’ll be good for you.” His smirk slips into a softer smiler, and he leans forward, grinding his cock into you, and leaving sharp kisses against your neck.

“Then cum for me,” he murmurs against your neck, before shifting to lightly bite your shoulder. Your eyes squeeze shut, and you cant your hips against him, pussy fluttering around him. You grip his biceps tightly, orgasm overwhelming you.

“That’s it. Creaming so pretty on my dick,” Ukai whispers, watching your face contort in pleasure. He ruts into you, fingers still expertly teasing your clit, in an attempt to draw out your orgasm. Your eyes crack open, small tears leaking from your eyes.

“It’s too much, Kei,” you squeal, nails digging into his biceps as you try to squirm away from him. He tuts lightly at you, his hot tongue swiping along the delicate bite mark that’s on your shoulder.

“I thought you wanted to be good for me,” he rumbles. You nod, letting your eyes shut again. The fingers that were tortuously circling your clit slip away to pinch you’re inner thigh. “Look at me, baby.” You pry your eyes open and pant against him. His clever fingers continue their ministrations, and his hips grind deeper into you, making your brain feel foggy and warm.

“I wanna be good,” you mumble, hands leaving his biceps to tangle themselves into his hair. Ukai makes an approving sound, and he kisses your cheek.

“Cum. Again.” A pathetic cry tears itself from your throat, and you focus on the intense pleasure you’re feeling. Ukai leans down, littering your chest with little sharp bites that make you keen. Your brows pinch at the intense pleasure, hips grinding against him. You’re already close again, and you tug at his hair, urging him to kiss you again. His lips eagerly find yours, and you feel him smile against you. You’re so close to falling over that edge again. Your cunt is absolutely drenched, and the erotic squelching makes you flush.

Ukai’s tongue prods at your lips, and you obediently open your mouth, letting him in. It’s sloppy and desperate, and it’s perfect. His fingers dig into your clit, pinching it, and you are flung into the stratosphere, stars popping into your vision. You gush around his cock, and he groans against your lips.

Your thighs twitch, and your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him close to you, urging him to still. He complies, peppering your face with kisses as you come back to earth.

“So pretty,” he whispers against you. You card your fingers through his hair as you try to catch your breath.

“Oh my god, Keishin.” Your voice wavers, and you're embarrassed by how hoarse you sound.

“Want me to stop?” You shake your head desperately at his question, and your legs tighten around him.

“No. I just need a second.” He chuckles watching as your screws up. “I didn’t think I was that sensitive,” you sigh. You unlace your fingers from his hair, wiping at the sweat that’s on your neck.

Ukai smirks at you as he shifts to kneel.  His warm hands gripping your waist, keeping you flushed against him. You whine at the movement, pussy tightening around him. His eyes trail over where he enters you, admiring how you’re spread out for him.

“Or, maybe my dick’s too big for you,” he taunts, no real malice behind his words. You squeak at his words, feeling embarrassed and warm.  “Yea, that’s it,” he continues, fondly looking at your messy cunt. “You’re so sensitive cause it barely fits in your cunt,” he coos.

“Oh my god,” you murmur, lazily wrapping your legs around him. He lets out a laugh, one that resounds through the apartment, and you smile at him, something syrupy running through your head. “And I think-“

You cut yourself off, nerves overtaking you. His head cocks to the side, and his thumb strokes your waist in a reassuring manner.

“I’m balls deep in you. Don’t get shy on me now,” he says gently, his soft tone colliding with his crude words.

“You’re so vulgar, Keishin.” You roll your eyes at him, a soft smile creeping onto your face. “It could be that,” you say, not wanting to repeat his words, “but I also think I may be sensitive cause it’s you.”

Your voice is soft, and you watch as Ukai practically melts. His arms wrap around you, pulling you against his chest. You moan as your weight settles on him, increasing the pressure from his cock.

“Are you being serious right now?” His voice rumbles through you, and you bite your lip and nod. You press a palm to his cheek, relishing in the way he leans into it.

“There’s no one for me but you, Keishin.” Ukai kicks his legs out behind you, letting you get more comfortable on his lap. His arms wrap around you, holding you close to him, and he buries his face into your neck. His hips buck up into you, making you squeal.

“Gonna fuck you so good. You’re never gonna be able to think about anyone but me inside this pussy.” He punctuates his words with a thrust, and your nails dig into his back. You rock your hips against him, as he sprinkles kisses against your neck.

“Ever since,” you pant, “ ever since I got back, all I’ve thought about is you. I missed you so much.” He moans into your neck, and his sweet kisses turn into little bites, nipping at the sensitive skin there.

“Did you touch yourself? Thinking about my fat cock pushing into you?” he mutters in between nips. Your brows pinch together and you nod as your exhausted pussy flutters again.

“Yes! But all I wanted was you!” Ukais teeth clamp down on your neck, not hard enough to break skin, but it stings. You squeal as he roughly changes positions again, forcing you on your back again, legs wrapped tightly around him.

His pace is relentless, pounding into you. Your fingers claw down his back, and his hands squeeze your hips.

“It’s too much, Kei,” you cry out, eyes squeezing shut. Ukai presses a searing kiss to your lips, thumb digging into your side.

“Please, baby. Give me one more. Cum for me one more time,” he mumbles into your lips. You nod against him, blinking through the tears. “Good. Just let me fuck you like this.”

His cock drives deep in you, making you keen. Your hands travel up to his hair, tangling into it, and tugging at the strands. He feels everywhere, his presence is overwhelming, hot and heavy. His hips rut into you, lips peppering your face with small kisses. Your cunts already oversensitive can feel your orgasm approaching.

“I’m close, Kei,” you choke out, pussy gushing around his cock. You flush at the lewd noises, but he just moans nuzzling his face into your neck.

“Give it to me. Wanna feel your little pussy squeeze around me.” You hold him to your neck, hips bucking into him. Ukai’s hand snakes down in between the two of you, and his fingers rub intense circles on your clit. Your eyes squeeze shut, as the building pleasure finally reaches its peak.

“Just like that, baby. Cum around my cock.” You writhe beneath him, your hands traveling to claw down his back. Your hot cunt grips him tight, legs tightening around his waist. “Just like that,” he groans, before his teeth sink into the base of your shoulder. You moan his name loudly, loud enough that you would be embarrassed later, but for not you don’t care. All you can focus on is the white-hot pleasure that’s coursing through your system.

Ukai’s thrusts don’t stop, plowing into you and prolonging your orgasm. He pulls his hand away from your clit, and he slips his arms in between your back and the bed, holding you tightly. You whine as you feel his hips begin to lose their pace, thrusts no longer steady. Your legs squeeze around him, keeping him close to you.

“Cum inside, please I need it,” you beg. He pulls away from your neck, eyebrows creasing in concern. “I’m on the pill. It’s safe, I promise. Please Kei, I need you to fill me, please, please, please.”

“Alright, baby. I’ll give you what you want.” His head drops back to the crook of your neck, as he stutters against you, hot spurts of cum flooding your pussy. He falls against you, before rolling onto his side, keeping you tight against him. His cock is still lodged within you, and you whine at the movement. Sweet kisses litter your face and neck, and you blink blearily at him. He slowly pulls out of you, grunting at the way your pussy flutters. You grimace as his cum drips out of your abused cunt.

“Gotta get you cleaned up,” he mumbles, before standing up and disappearing to the bathroom. You flop onto your back, trying to catch your breath. When Ukai returns, he kneels in between your shaky legs, and ever so carefully, he takes care of you. There’s something unusually soft in his actions, soft enough to make your heart squeeze. He also gets you a glass of water, which you gulp down. He lights a cigarette, as he watches your eyes start to clear up.

“Keishin, you’re kind of nasty,” you mumble, stretching your arms out above your head. His laugh rumbles through the air, as he takes a drag. He eyes you greedily, as if he’s going to eat you alive.

“This was nothing. There’s so much I wanna do to you.” His voice is low, heavy with exhaustion. “But for now I just want to hold you.”

“Well that can be arranged,” you tease, lying back on the bed. Ukai chuckles, putting out his cigarette and crawling forward to wrap his arms around you. You sigh in contentment, letting your eyes shut.

“I missed you,” he mutters, and you smile against him.

“I missed you too, Keishin.” Sleep tugs at your brain, luring it to a deep rest.

“Did you mean it? What you said?” His voice is unusually quiet, delicately piercing the air. His thumb gently strokes your arm. Your eyes flutter open, and your brows pinch as you try to recall what you had said.

“About what?” you ask, trying to stifle a yawn.

“What you said? About you and me?”

Oh.

Oh.

You smile at him, leaning in to press a chaste kiss to his lips. When you pull away, you lean your forehead against his and you smile.

“The only person for me is you, Keishin. It’s always been you.” He hums happily before he pulls you against him.

“Good. Cause I was serious. I’m not letting you go again.” You shut your eyes and nuzzle into him, taking comfort in the way his arms wrap around you. And it’s in those arms that you embrace the most peaceful sleep you’ve had in years.✨

[girlindelusionn]

finally finished himym!! hated the finale (of course) so here's another "most likely to" but much longer to help me cope (negate, why lie to you) with how the most awesome couple ended

(also this probably has a million mistakes but im too lazy to do something about it, having to write in english is hard man, so please ignore it:D)

most likely to: swarkles version :)

Who spends almost all their money on the other?

barney, definitely. he's not exactly the best at actually coming up with gifts so sometimes for birthdays or stuff like that he just takes her to the mall and lets her pick whatever she wants (he also makes fun of her the whole time, but i don't think it's necessary to clarify that)

Which one drives the car and which one gives them directions?

barney doesn't know how to drive and is generally better with technology, so robin drives and he gives directions and prevents her fights with the gps to get really violent

also robin is a REALLY violent driver, she doesn't go really fast but if anyone has the audacity to get in her way shes going to definitely roast the fuck out of them

"oh i know you're not honking at me… LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT, IM GOING TO MAKE THE TURN WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? YOU WANT ME TO FLY OVER YOU? GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND LET ME GET IN THE FUCKING L– there you go, thanks!..."

Which one gives the other a piggyback ride when they're tired?

barney to robin, one of the "corny couple" million things he swore he wasn't going to do. but then robin simply looks at him with a sad face, explaining how much her feet hurt and he can't say no

Who is the most affectionate?

barney, actually

it's surprising, cause he's always been someone who likes his space but there's times, mostly in private, when he just can't keep his hands to himself. and you would think it's purely sexual but no, in the contrary, most times it's just a hand in her hair or her back, or demanding hugs and cuddles

Who falls asleep in the other's lap and who carries them to bed?

trick question! barney is who carries robin to bed, but she falls asleep in his shoulder

and he is the one who falls asleep in robin's lap, with her running her hands through his hair

Who wakes up first?

neither of them is a morning person, but usually robin works out in mornings so her. on weekends they stay in bed as long as they can

Who apologizes first after an argument?

they're both stubborn as hell so they schedule apologizes and take turns on doing it

Who is the nerd?

both of them, in different aspects. like robin likes math to the point of doing problems and equations for fun ??? and well, barney is a huge star wars, lord of the rings, that kinda books, nerd

i like to think that they have harry potter in common, they've read all the books, make marathons with the movies, they even went to the universal park! and had a lot of fun there (of course they've never told the guys that)

Who makes the other one laugh the most?

barney, he knows robin cant be mad and laughing at the same time and he uses it as an advantage

Who sleep talks?

robin 🥺

Who hogs the blankets at night?

also robin, but barney doesn't care

Who is the neat freak?

neither of them, but they manage to keep the place decent

Who likes to surprise the other with random gifts?

barney! single flowers, tiny chocolates, etc

Who buys the healthy food in the house?

robin, but it's mostly barney who does the actual cooking

Who has better music taste?

robin 😎

Who takes care of the spiders?

they do it together as a team, and if that doesn't work (aka if the spider is slightly bigger than average) they just go whining to marshall and he fixes it

Who uses more nicknames?

barney is mostly sweetie but after the wedding robin is kinda obsessed with the word husband

"so how's the most handsome husband, huh?"

"did you buyed the milk I texted you for, husband?"

"hi, husband!!"

robin is babe or sometimes honey, and after the wedding barney keeps calling her his "ex-girlfriend" (don't tell anyone, but he also LOVES the term wife, he can't comprehend how is he so lucky to have her as his wife)

(update after actually finishing the show: r-train and b-nasty!!!)

Who's the little spoon?

first year of dating? robin

after that is barney, you can't change my mind

Who suggests scary movies for film night?

robin!! but they both like them

Who gets jealous more often?

both, barney is less dissimulated about it

Who brings up kids first?

no of them, lol

Who borrows who's clothes more?

robin, she has stole the few hoodies he had and sometimes for sexy times likes using his ties

barney secretly uses some of her giganteus t shirts (he makes fun of her for buying them but he's actually glad she does) for sleep when she's away for the night

...they smell like her, okay? leave him alone

(also he loves when she uses his underwear and sometimes the only way to convince her to do it is doing the same himself, so he has wore panties)

(don't tell ted)

(please)

Who cries more during sad movies?

barney, is hard for robin to cry for movies, also he loves villains and they hardly have a happy ending so...

Who falls asleep on the other more?

robin, she falls asleep very easily

Who says I love you more?

barney :)

Who initiates kisses more?

also blondie, again he's a little obsessed with his wife

Who initiates hugs more?

robin this time

Who takes more pictures of the other?

robin, for sure. at first it was cause she wanted that bad picture of him, but then his husband is really cute with his sleepy eyes and the sun on his face, or looks so excited to watch the next episode of some lame show, or he's bringing her breakfast at bed with a big smile or looks a little too good with his new suit and she can't help but take her phone out and snap a pic of him

Who leaves notes for the other one around the house?

barney, at first it was to annoy her, like writing "you lost the game!!" at random places (i'm sorry lmao, i just realized i made you lose too, lol) or "sorry, babe! i ate it all last night" at the empty wrappers of candy in the fridge

but then one day barney found one in a coffee mug:

"wow, you didn't put much imagination in hiding this one, didn't you?" he said, his girlfriend was in the bedroom finishing to get ready for work.

"read it!!" she shot back, a little… nervous?

"i love you", the note said.

"scherbatsky?"

"yeah...?"

"come here"

"what's up?" she finally showed up to the living room, looking all tiny and scared

"love you too, loser"

Who gets drunk faster?

barney? i don't know, they both handle scotch pretty well, so i'm guessing it takes a while for them to get drunk

Who gets hit on more by strangers?

robin, but she couldn't care less

Who makes food for the house more often?

barney, he's a surprisingly good cook

[rosiehufflepuff]

☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑

𝓦𝓮𝓫 𝓸𝓯 𝓮𝓶𝓸𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼

🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️🍑☁️

Summary : Draco emotions is getting the best of him , as you and Harry are paired for astronomy project , causing a big hit in your friendship not only that but also causing you to ask why he was jealous when you are only friends and how he is trying to control who you can have as friends and who you can’t have as you call out his toxic behaviour and Draco discovers his emotions .

Draco X Fem Reader

Warning : jealousy . Possessive Draco , Insecure Draco , Harry and Draco rivalry , Angst , and too much FLUFF

House : Hufflepuff

Year : fifth

Link of the casual outfit : https://drive.google.com/file/d/1eMCrdnjLtSN-6Xjysfvffq4HzeX-rJk_/view?usp=drivesdk

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Draco watched as his anger was getting too big that he felt that his body couldn’t contain it anymore , usually Draco could keep a straight face whatever any emotion he felt but at this moment he couldn’t , you were smiling at Potter being all friendly and such , leading his blood to boil , you were extremely friendly with the annoying Gryffindor!! Yes , he get it , Hufflepuff and all , being nice is the nature , that what made him attached to you in first place , but you were talking and being kind To HIS ENEMY ! You shouldn’t even be talking to him !! In first place !! You were his friend ! HIS !!! You should only talk to him not his enemies !!

“ hoho wow ... we are finally seeing emotions on malfoy face “ Theo couldn’t help but comment with a smug smirk as he earns a harsh scowl from the icy blonde boy “ shut it Nott or I swear the next thing that you will see is my shoes squishing your eyes “ “ he is right though Malfoy , your face is literally changing colours , expression , and literally your eyes are stuck on them ! “ Blaise commented more like stating fact ” that is true also !! , draco do you know what we are doing for this project ? ” pansy gave a questionable look to the pale boy, resulting in draco to run his hand in his hair as he breaths heavily , getting up from his chair “ since you all being Nosy Fucking Twats and it seems like you have plenty of time to blab why don’t you all continue on the project , yeah ? “ with that draco left with glare as he walked out of the library to cool off “ he got it so bad ......” Theo commented with a smirk “ yes completely ” earning an agreement from both Slytherins .

Draco went out , breathing deeply the fresh air , you were his friend and his hate for Harry was no secret for you and you were a Hufflepuff and that was no secret for Draco , he knows ‘ the moral code of the Hufflepuffs’ and how strong did you hold into them .

However what irritated and concerned Draco was you and Potter were friends. Before..... You and him even talked , he is fully aware of Potter ideas about slytherin and him....which leaded to a fear of losing you to him......

Does he trust your judgement? ...........of course he does , does he trust Potter ? Dear Salazar NO .... and that what worries him ... also the idea of you and Harry leaves a sour taste in his mouth , a strong one .

you were quite attractive and you had a decent personality And of course what will make the Gryffindor happier than making the slytherin ‘s life miserable!......... by taking you away from him and as much as he despised it, you and Potter are quite fitted for each other ......but no way in the name of Merlin ’s Bread he would give you to him!!

The slytherin prince now knew for sure that universe actually hated his guts cause just in this moment you and Potter walked out , you , smiling as harry is pointing out the stars while you are carrying a sketch book with your quil as you both admired the dark night sky .

Draco didn’t know what is the assignment was nor he cared about it in this moment , all he cared about was to hear what you and Potter talked about , as the way to do that was neither of you can see him . Causing him to blend with the darkness of the trees shadows

“ and you see here , two days from now we will see Jupiter's movement ! “ Harry explained excitingly causing you to smile “ yes i know !! However ........ I feel it would be hard to see from the astronomy tower as all fifth year students would be there for it ...... do you think we would able to glance it , write the essay and fill the star chart ......? “ you couldn’t help but voice your concerned leading Harry to think for a moment

“ Gryffindor tower !!” “ excuse me ........I meant ......say again..........? “ “ we can see it from the Gryffindor tower !!” “ wait really ??” “ yes , most of students won’t think of this “ “ well I’m sure Hermione did think of that “ you said while giggling a little , making Harry himself chuckle “ of course she would “ he said it , rolling his eyes jokingly as he continued “ we can of course go there .......if you have n-no problem I mean ........” “ of course ! Why would I have a problem in Helga ‘s name ? “ you said giving the chosen boy a big smile , making him grin himself “ excellent ! Meet me in front of the fat lady portrait !” ” you got yourself a deal potter ” you said seriously, resulting in him to chuckle ” beautiful deal I would say ” ” well that was smooth ” you said as you gave the boy in glasses a playful look ” really? I thought it was little sap ” yes kinda but still smooth ” ” ouch well I better go before I say more sappy stuff yeah? See ya tomorrow ” ” see ya!!” you both parted ways, not noticing the hidden boiling fire in the very dark.

Draco was furious and angry, he flirted with you AND YOU FLIRTED BACK !! HE ASKED YOU ON A DATE AND YOU ACCPET IT !! that is a project NOT A CHANCE FOR POTTER TO SNOG YOU !!!

He didn’t like what he saw , in fact, it resulted in leaving a huge fury to swallow his body , to him , it was you choosing Potter over him and it left a wound in the pale boy ‘s heart , like everyone else they would .... he didn’t know why it was hurting , .... it felt like you are leaving him behind .....and replacing him with what people always say, is better than him ........ Draco couldn’t control his emotions anymore resulting in him to run to the slytherin dungeon to be alone with his thoughts , he is not gonna give Potter what he always wanted .... which is a breakdown .

🌻————————-🌻

After two days passed , it was the weekend and Merlin , you didn’t wanna to wake up after a whole week the last day always seemed to be so hard but you needed to get up , no matter what , cause no one would Attend it for you .

An annoyed groan slips from your mouth as you jump out of the bed stretching and getting yourself into your yellow and black uniform , last day but one of the busiest , you have heavy school day not forgetting of course the meeting with Harry. However you were quite excited , you are gonna see the Jupiter movement clearly also you never saw the Gryffindor tower from inside so yes , maybe it will be a good day after all.

Walking out to your first class which was herbology a subject you completely adored , being with professor sprout cheerful personality and voice , some people fainting causing a giggle here and there , the whispers of the plants and finally , A current slytherin shared this class with you and being with him made the hardest things bearable , one of these is Snape class of course , with his help and quiet jokes he made you like it a little ,

Giggling at some old jokes Draco did through the classes you shared , you notice that you arrived to the green house .

You stood inside of the green house with Fanged Geranium sitting on the table showing her teeth in front Of you , as you hear the head of your house talking about the quality of it and how to deal with it , your eyes wondered to check on Draco .

You didn’t see him since you entered , you knew draco likes the green house , even though he would never admit it to the world , you saw the twinkle in his eyes when he is looking to the plants however he was no where in the sight ,

it is like the sky heard you or something and wanted to prove you wrong cause suddenly the door of green house opened quietly , revealing the white haired boy , walking as he bows to the older hufflepuff “oh good dear Helga ..... you are so late Mr.Malfoy !!!” “Im very knowledgeable about that Mrs sprout and I give you my apologies....” the older teacher couldn’t help but sigh “ fine , go take your plant next to Miss L/N .....please miss L/N ....update Mr. Malfoy about the topic ....For the rest , please work on your plants carefully ! I don’t wanna accidents !!! Not again !!!!! “

Even thought he looked perfectly put together , the slytherin ‘s face was looking yellowish , was he sick ? , thinking again - you never saw him yesterday at all ... was something going on ....? However you knew he didn’t like to be pressed for stuff so you just watch him as he took his place next to you ...

you give him the warmest comforting smile “ Draco good morning dear .......did you sleep well “ a nod , you get only a nod from the boy so you try to keep the conversation going “ well ... today we are assigned the plant of Fanged Geranium and we need - “ I actually know about it....... I read about it in a book before , you don’t need to waste your energy yeah? “ like that he cuts you off sharply and for some reason he seemed distance , you were weirded out by that kind of behavior but you thought maybe that is his morning attitude which eventually would disappear ...so you both continued to work in silence .

Soon the class ended , you hear Draco sigh as he walks away to his Slytherin friends , ignoring you completely which weirded you out , he never did that he would at least wave or something or make sure his hand brushed yours giving you a smirk ...his new behavior was weird ....you decided to let it to be , till it is lunch time for you both, -to give him a breath of time- , you will make sure to catch him and ask him about his act .

🌻————————🌻

Moving from class to class to class you were half done with the day ......finally Merlin ..........you were getting tired from all these classes as now you have the chance to eat for first time in the day as you skipped the frost meal in exchange of sleeping more , cause Dear Helga....... you were almost dead tired from the whole week and you needed these extra hours .

As you were running from the class , ready for the feast that will be served to your groaning stomach , you got faced by the crowded halls .

Trying to make your way through , you pumped into the slytherin prince, however before you open your mouth , he looked to you in the eyes then just walked away without of course forgetting to pump his shoulder into yours .........saying you were surprised would be underestimating .....what was this all about ...why he is being like that ....you were best friends ......well .....he was your best friend at least.......you were confused and somehow getting an anxious feelings in you Body . That you forget that you froze in mid of hallway till someone told you to move ,resulting into you falling back to the reality , shoving all bad feelings into the back of your head , you start to move to the grand hall .

You sat in the grand hall , Eating your food .......well..........trying , you don’t know what happened but somehow the food didn’t taste as amazing as you imagined or maybe you just lost your appetite, either how, you just ate the food cause your body was in desperate need of energy recharge and the least you need is to faint and let Harry do the work , he was your close friend and that wasn’t fair to anyone in first place .

While eating you glanced The Malfoy Boy , Getting up after finishing his food and going outside , you jump on your feet as fast as you can walking in hurry to catch up to him , as soon as you did , you both were in the halls . “ draco “ you called , no answer “ draco , it is rude to not answer me ! Stop being a child and talk to me “ these words made the pale boy stop in his heels and turn to face you with cold gaze “ wanna talk ? Sure let s talk then ! ”

You took a deep breath to calm your soaring Anger ...someone needed to be the grown up now “ why are you behaving like that !!! What is this all about !!!” “Oh you recall fully what is this all about ....!” You were stunned......... what did you do you? “ what do you mean?” “ well you know what ....forget it !!” “ you know you are not communicating right now !!! I wanna comprehend what is it !” “ oh if I’m not communicating well then why don’t you go to Potter, I’m sure he will fulfill this for you better !”

So this what all of this about ......... with this foolish rivalry!!!...“ draco you totally realize that he is a friend !! Yes, you both are not in best terms but he is still my friend !!” “ yes, but witch !!! being in good terms with him doesn’t mean , being flirtatiousness and snogging him in the gryfindor tower !!! “ “ you were spying on me !!!!” You were sick....you are feeling sick from how the Slytherin boy felt so entitled to spy on you , and question you !!!who does he think Himself is! “ I wasn’t spying , you were the ones who were in public“ “ but you chose to hear it!You were spying !!!” ”Well even if I did !! I was protecting you !! I DONT TRUST HIM “ “ well right now It is you who I don’t trust !!! ....this is not protection THIS YOU TRYING TO CONTROL MY LIFE !! IN WHAT ENTITLEMENT DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN TO FEEL LIKE THAT IS YOUR RIGHT !! IM NOT SOMETHING TO BE OWNED !! I DESERVE RESPECT ! “ you quieted for a moment to take a breath from the pervious outburst before continuing “ And from this sorry .....but I don’t see that you have that for me and I don’t think I would like to be friends anymore “ Draco eyes widened at this for a second almost missing it out before his straight cold look came back “ fine as you wish “ with that he walked away , leaving you behind with tears dripping out of your eyes .

Draco rushed through the halls to reach his perfect room fast , he felt chocked by all crowds that started to fill the halls , he felt the tears already were about to come out and the last thing he needed was the whole school to witness Draco Malfoy crying about a girl that he doesn’t comprehend what he feel about her and hurt him , barely reaching the slytherin common room without breaking down . The slytherin boy shuttered the password out of his lips ,hurrying to his perfect bedroom ignoring the glances that he was getting from his house mates , locking the door as he finally let all his emotions out in the loneliness of his room not attending the rest of the day .

🌻----------------🌻

You were getting ready to meet Harry for astronomy project , trying to hold all the emotions inside, like you did for the rest of the day after the dilemma with Draco , you didn’t see him after and that was better for you , you didn’t know how will you react , you trusted him but he has no respect for you , he was acting like you are his doll not his equal .....he didn’t trust you , you felt so small and disrespected , you wanted to cry not cause of him no but cause you feel you trusted someone one who didn’t see you for who you are but saw your as object but you won’t let someone who thought like that stop your life , you looked at yourself noticing your outfit : a lacy off white blouse with lantern sleeves with Peter Pan collar . blue straight ankle length jeans and beige ankle boots ,

breathing a deep breath , you look put together and that is what you wanted , you didn't want anyone to notice your mood and the tears that slipped here and there , the last thing you need to hear ‘are you okay ‘ , cause you knew for sure these words will make you cry , and you don’t wanna to explain to Harry The Who stupidity of situation and causing more drama .

Rushing out of the warm dorm of the Hufflepuff common room to the halls as you walked fast to read the fat lady portrait praying to helga in her grave to not make you face to face with the slytherin boy , as you reach the painting you took a deep breath, Causing a look from the lady in painting , you felt for a second like you almost forgot to breath from how anxious you were till you feel a hand on your shoulder , causing you to turn , you see the brown haired boy with his famous smile as if it is contiguous you smiled without feeling “ did I make you wait for long?” “ oh no no no not at all !! I just came here ! “ “ so ummm shall we ?” You nod with a smile , the gryffindor muttered the password of the week , showing a grand hole as entrance, you both crawl inside of the Gryffindor room , taking the whole inside of you, the room was warm and cozy just missing some plants and It would be a copy of your own house room somehow that was calming .

The chosen boy was correct, not many people was there and of course Hermione was there with some Ravenclaw and Ron causing you to giggle a bit without feeling it , knowing what this was about Harry himself let an airy laugh “ yes yes you were correct ....now stop , she is giving us looks!! “ the boy whispered trying to hold his laughter , indeed the girl was giving you look like you both are crazy or something , as you both failed to hold your laughter , but it was quite humorous for some reason , some gryfindors were there with their groups but it was so few That you can count them on your fingers .

Both of you and Harry settled down close to the window , talking as you admired the stars, trying to fill the chart and waiting to see Jupiter movement “ god when the bloody hell will it show “ you couldn’t help but giggle as you hear Ron hearing him resulting to get a hit from Hermione “ he is right though Harry we have been waiting for long “ you said as you stretched your legs that almost were falling off from having them in same position for long “ “I think it will show soon ....” “ SHH it is happening !!” Hermione screamed on top of her lungs causing Ron to roll his eyes .

you watched......... memorised by the whole thing , it was marvellous thing ... all this beauty happening by nature ...nature amazed you with everything it provided and how beautifully it is done , you for sure won’t forget that ....

🌻----------------🌻

After long time of writing the essay , giggling at Ron foolishness , joking around , and helping each other in that pain in the arse assignment.... Yet it was somehow fun, painful work but fun .

later it was done ,Harry walked you to the painting and after huge back and forth, you convinced him that you would be fine going back to your room and nothing to be worried about.

you are now enjoying your walk to the hufflepuff common room , feeling the cold air and the soundlessness, cooling you, ......finally the weekend , done with the deadly assignment , sighing deeply , you realised you reached the entry , you play the rhythm to enter , ready to be welcomed by the talking plants and the warm room ,

This positivity get demolished by seeing a curtain blonde head youth sitting in front of the entry like a dog scolded by his owner , as soon as he sees you , he is quick on his feet , fixing his hair by running a hand in it

“ you are here .....y/n .....” “ ..........Malfoy ......” “ please don’t call me that ......” “ why it is your name , eh ? “ “y/n .........please......... don’t ........” you raise an eyebrow to him questionably , knowing your slient question, you see his face going from emotion to emotion to emotion as he tried to open his mouth to speak “I-I-I apologize for my foolishness and you are fully ........correct .....the way I behaved ...............childish was the way I acted ......I apologize again ......” draco sharp grey eyes was staring hard into your soul trying to read your face , try to see if you hated him or does he has any chance with your forgiveness .

You close your eyes breathing heavily for a second , you didn’t want to look into his eyes , you saw how swollen his bloody shot eyes were and he looked miserable however though some parts of you wanted to forgive the boy, you weren’t satisfied “draco .......the reason of your -“ “ I respect you ........way more than the words can tell .....and you totally deserve to know why this behavior..............it is not cause .....I don’t respect you no ..................it is cause some stupid silly emotions that let......me act like that -“ “ jealousy “

Gulping hard at the name of the emotion , Draco never felt jealous ever !! He is a Malfoy people felt jealous from him not the opposite what he wanted he got it , so this was a hard pill to swallow to him “ ...yes and had some fears.......... about potter.........and his thought about me ....resulting you .............to ........stop being with me ................. “ you held draco hands , finally realizing his feelings And for first time you see a rosiness tint on his cheeks , draco wasn’t very touching persona ....as he was so tense about it but he was used to it from you, later two years from knowing you nevertheless, he never flushed , he was accepting, awkwardly though , but no blushing , yet in his state you won’t point it out , it was already hard for him opening up and you appreciated and you wanna be comforting as you can as you try to calm his creeping anxiety . “ Draco I would never replace or leave cause someone opinion ever !! You mean so much to me !! I can’t imagine you out of my life ....you are very important and unreplaceable to me and thank you for apologising “ you say as you hug him , causing his body to go tense before warping his shaking arms around before squeezing you tightly as he bury his face in your shoulder , your run your hand in his soft messy hair as you hear him speak softly “ I discovered a new emotion also ....” “hmm ?” ..........Love..............”

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I don't know if there is going to be part two!! But I hope you all like this

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 19]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, powerbottom!seungcheol, brat!seungcheol, dom!reader, restraints(handcuffs), sex toys, dirty talk, degradation, dumbificiation, spitplay, yall the way i be using DDD like i’m guy fieri in this bitch ☠️ dkjfhdskh Also, merry christmas if you celebrate it!! Happy holidays!! Be safe, enjoy your day~💕 I’d say this is my gift to yall but I update every friday, I just so happen to be uploading on christmas LOL Although, Cherry Bomb has been a gift to write 🥺!! One more chapter after this, I can’t believe it... But also first chapter of DD next week 😳 Hehe~ as always, inbox roundup this weekend! Enjoy ch 19 and have a great weekend everyone!! ❤️🍒💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - x

“Hyung… Are you… Okay?”

Seungcheol drops the set of skates in his hold; eye twitching when he turns to face both Seokmin and Jeongguk who stare back at him with a concerned gaze. “You haven’t moved from this spot in the last 15 minutes, Jeongguk was starting to get worried… And honestly, me too. You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Or three.”

“I, uh, yeah, I’m good.” Seungcheol laughs it off, shaking his head and letting out a deep breath he didn’t realize he was holding in. “It’s just… Well, I don’t wanna spoil anything but I’m just nervous for tonight.” He bites his bottom lip, remembering when you’d posted the notice to your homepage that basically sealed in the plans you had for him and really, what he had in store for you too.

The two younger males share a look, eyebrows raised. “Whatever’s got you this nervous must be good ‘cause you literally just zoned out and turned into a mannequin for 15 minutes. It was weird!” Jeongguk laughs; half in nervousness for Seungcheol and half in amusement. “Me and Seokmin snapped a few pics too. For posterity.”

Seungcheol rolls his eyes before he picks up the pair of skates again, “Okay, okay, enough with the teasing. Get back to work before Namjoon-hyung sees us all over here!”

“We could say the same to you!”

“Interesting setup…” Seungcheol mutters, eyes glossing over the vibrator, pink fuzzy handcuffs, and cockring that are neatly lined up on the bed. “Should I be concerned that this looks a little too normal?”

You laugh under your breath as you readjust your bra strap one last time before easing onto the bed yourself; patting the spot next to you. “Nah, trust me, it’s not gonna be that crazy. Now c’mere, we only have 10 minutes ‘til we need to start and you’re just standing there fidgeting like we’re about to fuck for the first time ever.”

“Damn, we should’ve done a show with a corruption kink or something.”

“Hey, it’s never too late!”

artist8hao: this looks relatively normal considering the notice

kitty_junjun has donated $75

gc__koo: yea… and considering how i found hyung earlier

alphagyu97: ???

alphagyu97: wdym

gc__koo: mans was a statue 

xcaliburDK: yea it was weird, it was like he was possessed 

sleepy_wonu: wait u work with him too??

therealchan99: wait is that why u almost quit?

xcaliburDK: can we not talk about me right now thank u

universe_WZ has donated $75

angelhan has donated $100

artist8hao has donated $50

“Well! Aren’t you all a lively bunch tonight!” You giggle softly, wrapping an arm around one of Seungcheol’s as he tenses up under your touch. “Seungcheol’s so tense tonight! Can we get some words of encouragement for him before we start~”

gc__koo: ayyyy my man its gonna be ok

hoshi_tiger_xx: think of it this way, any of us would pay to be in your position rn

tangerine_kwan: l i t e r a l l y

chwenon: its not like ur getting pegged 

chwenon: right

Seungcheol’s cheeks bloom a bright pink, wide eyes meeting yours as you laugh loudly. “Wait, is that what the vibrator is for ��cause I--”

“No, no, no! Seungcheol’s not getting pegged tonight, okay?” Grinning, you ease off the bed and make your way towards the nightstand as Seungcheol watches you from behind.

You grab the item, smiling as you hide it from Seungcheol’s view for a little while longer.

“See, when we, really just I, decided to do this back to back camshow for the last time, I really wanted to try something new, y’know? But nothing too far out there ‘cause I didn’t wanna push our boundaries too much.” You move your hand, flashing the object in front of Seungcheol’s face as he raises an eyebrow.

“A gopro?”

Nodding, you show it to the camera, “Mmhmm~ The quality is gonna go down a bit but I think it’ll be okay! It’ll be worth it~” You set it down next to the array of toys, winking at the camera before settling in next to Seungcheol again.

You lean into his side, grabbing his arm and putting it on your inner thigh as you moan. “Thought that they’d like a new view of us, y’know? Instead of just the static view that we usually have. Now you can film me riding your cock and get a good view of it for the camera~” Seungcheol smirks as he drags his hand up your thigh; fingertips grazing against your panties as you mewl.

“So that’s the game you wanna play tonight, huh, baby? You wanna film each other up close and personal for everyone to see?”

He can feel his cock twitch in his sweats, already eager to see where this went.

“Well…” You bite the inside of your cheek, face hot as you pry his hand off of you. “Actually, I want you up by the headboard while I set up this gopro. Think you can shimmy up there, ‘Cheol?”

The male nods slowly, shuffling towards the headboard as you turn to the camera. “The stream’s probably gonna cut out for a sec while I set this up but please be patient with me, okay?” Winking, you quickly set up the gopro before cutting out the stream to fiddle with the settings and changing it so that the stream was coming from the gopro instead.

“Ah, good! It works!” You make sure everyone can see you from the smaller device before you’re rejoining Seungcheol on the bed; eyes twinkling with mischief as you hand the gopro to him before reaching for the toys you’d laid out.

chwenon: im rly curious about this

universe_WZ: i know, same

alphagyu97: fuck the angles we’re about to get with this for future shows tho

hoshi_tiger_xx: oh hell yeah

Seungcheol holds onto the gopro, making sure to film you as you hold the vibrator in your hand. “Let’s start with this first, huh?” You don’t waste a second before you’re turning the toy on and pressing it against his clothed cock.

“Oh, s-shit!” He almost loses his grip on the small camera when his body threatens to double over at the vibrations that quickly have shivers running up his spine. “Oh fuck, that’s---that’s so s-strong!” Seungcheol’s hips cant up, grinding against the vibrations when he realizes how good it actually feels.

“Strong? It’s only the lowest setting, baby. Is your cock that sensitive?” You smile; voice laced with a teasing lilt and the pieces start to fall for Seungcheol when you seem to spit his own words back at him.

“That’s h-how it’s gonna be, huh?” He grits out, jaw clenched when you raise the setting to the second highest. “F-fuck, you---”

“What? We’re playing like I wanna tonight, right, ‘Cheollie?” Licking your lips, you lean in close to the camera before your lust filled eyes meet his.

“And tonight, you’re just my dumb little fucktoy that I get to play with, aren’t you?”

Seungcheol tugs against the fuzzy pink handcuffs that keep him bound to the headboard; gritting his teeth when you turn off the toy for the third time.

“Ah, ah, ah, don’t move around too much, Seungcheol. Dumb little fucktoys should be good and stay still, right?”

“Right.” Muttering, he watches as you bring the camera closer to his cock again, filming the vibrator that you tap against the cock head; both covered in precum.

“Your cock is already so hard~ God you’re so fuckin’ easy~” You squirm a little from where you straddle his thighs; already wanting to sit on his cock but also knowing you still wanted to play with him a little longer while you had him underneath you.

angelhan: goddamn she’s so fucking hot when shes the dom???

therealchan99: the way i would pay her to choke me and spit in my mouth

alphagyu97: she could put me on a leash and i’d bark without question

You turn on the toy again, pressing it against his cock as he groans and thrusts his hips up. “Ah! We should use the last toy, before you end up cumming without my permission.” Seungcheol lets out a choked sob at the way you sound so cheery, eyes looking up towards the ceiling while you set the vibrator down in favor of the cockring.

Wrapping a hand around his cock, you work you hand up and down as you smear the precum down his shaft. “Hmm~ Bet you’d cum right now if I just sucked you off, huh?”

“Dunno, why don’t you sink your pretty ‘lil mouth down on me and find out?” He snarkily replies.

You shoot him an angelic smile; one that makes him realize he really shouldn’t have said anything when you hurriedly ease the cockring down until it sits at the base of his cock. Grabbing the vibrator again, you turn it onto its highest setting before bringing it back to his cock and holding it parallel to his shaft. “You’re so mouthy~ You should really be careful with that~”

Seungcheol lets out a sharp, shaky breath; eyes wider than saucers when he feels his abdomen tightening and the pleasure rapidly building up in his body. “W-wait, but---but, ah, h-hold on, it--it feels like I’m g-gonna cum!” He tugs against his restraints as his entire body squirms and thrashes against the bed at the sensations that flood his body.

“Ah, you really are so fuckin’ easy for me, Seungcheol~”

A weird feeling washes over Seungcheol when he feels his cock twitching; mouth open in stuttered breaths as his eyebrows furrow. It felt like an orgasm, but at this point, he can’t even tell. “Wh--what?” He lets out a drawn out groan, throwing his head back against the pillows just as you shut the toy off and toss it to the side.

“I think you just experienced your first dry orgasm, huh? Not so fun being on the other side, is it? Being played with~” You laugh teasingly, readjusting yourself until you’re grinding down onto his cock. instead. “Mmh, I’m gonna use your cock and I’m gonna make myself cum and you can’t do anything about it~ Just my own personal fucktoy watching me get off~”

You take the gopro and set it down right on Seungcheol’s chest, “Don’t move, or else.” He nods once shakily, watching as you lift yourself up and position his cock right at your soaking entrance. 

The two of you share a moan once you finally start to sink down onto his cock but Seungcheol knows he won’t actually be able to cum anytime soon.

chwenon: they rly said VIEWS on this one

gc__koo: honestly, i aint even tryna get off i just like watching knowing hyung is lowkey suffering

gc__koo has donated $100

gc__koo: its like a reward

kitty_junjun: he’ll be lucky if he even gets to cum again lbr

sleepy_wonu: oh how the tables have turned huh?

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

tangerine_kwan: wait but…

tangerine_kwan: if today was her idea and tomorrow is his…

chwenon: uh oh

artist8hao: oh i didnt even think about that

artist8hao has donated $100

artist8hao: for the aftercare funds  

kitty_junjun: dont be too hard on her!!

kitty_junjun: also breakfast on me when ur not too tired

You start bouncing in his lap, loud moans on your lips when his cock curves perfectly into your g-spot.

“Oh, fuh--fuck, your cock is so g-good! Fuckin’ hits me so, hah, d-deep!”

Seungcheol can’t do anything but grit his teeth and let you alternate between bouncing on his lap and swiveling your hips atop his own; jaw clenched tight. “Y-yeah? Your so-called sex toy fucks you g-good? I don’t even have to, ah, do anything, all I have to do is lay here and you’d cum, huh?” He smirks up at you, convincing himself he’s one-upped you when you pout and halt your movements.

He lets out a soft groan when you clench around him and you’re quick to grab the gopro still sitting on his chest before turning the camera towards him.

“Such a bold mouth you’ve got. But don’t forget, you’re the one handcuffed to the bed and you’ve got a cockring on, baby~ I can give you more dry orgasms if you’d like?” You lick your lips, “Be a good little fucktoy and open your mouth for me.”

Seungcheol narrows his eyes before obeying, lips parting hesitantly. “Now, stick your tongue out.” You turn the camera and hold it from the side; filming yourself as you let a glob of spit fall from your lips, directly onto Seungcheol’s waiting tongue.

A shiver runs up his spine when he draws his tongue back in to swallow the saliva, hazy eyes staring back up at you when he parts his lips to show you that he’s swallowed it all down.

“See? You can be so obedient. You just choose to be a brat.”

“Where’s the fun if I make it easy for you? And it’s cute watching you trying to dom me when we both know how much you like being under me.”

You resume your movements, swiveling your hips as you set the gopro back down onto his chest. “Ah, all the things I could do to you right now, ‘Cheol~ We should do this again so I can try some wax play on you… Or, hah, m-maybe even ice play? Since your body is so fuckin’ sensitive. Bet you’d be so fuckin’ cute cumming over and over and whining when the overstimulation starts to bite~”

It only takes a second for Seungcheol to mentally say ‘screw it’ before he uses all his strength to plant his feet down onto the bed and start thrusting up into you. Your body jerks on top of him, surprised noises spilling from your lips at the strength he exerts in his frustration.

“My body’s sensitive? You take one look at me and your panties are fuckin’ soaked.” Seungcheol scoffs, watching as you grab the gopro and set it to the side before it topples off of him. “I might be your dumb little fucktoy today but you’re mine too. My dumb ‘lil cocksleeve that only knows how to beg me for cock. Your pussy was made for me, baby. Don’t forget that.”

The pleasure builds inside your body as you meet his thrusts and for a second, you contemplate taking off the handcuffs and the cockring, but instead deciding to keep them on. Unless he begged.

“Fuck, S--Seungcheol, ‘m g-gonna cum~” You reach down, fingertips on your clit as you hurry to throw yourself over the edge of an orgasm. “That’s right, cum on my cock like the desperate ‘lil cock hungry girl you are.” He growls in frustration; wanting to cum but knowing he wouldn’t be able to unless you took the cockring off.

“Oh god, Seungcheol!”

Your walls flutter around his cock and he lets out a garbled moan at how good you feel when you cum; exhaling harshly at the frustration of not being able to cum with you. “That’s right, bet it feels good with my cock inside your tight ‘lil cunt, huh?”

He halts his movements just as you opt to grind down on him, fingertips still rubbing and pinching at your clit as you ride out your high. “Mmh, bet you wanna cum too, don’t you, ‘Cheol? Wanna, ngh, fill my p-pussy up with your cum like you always do~ But do you even deserve it? Or should I leave you here and let you cool down?”

alphagyu97: the energy we’ve created in the studio tonight

xcaliburDK: i know, holy shit

angelhan: i feel like i'm actually scared for this man im ngl

alphagyu97: if she lets u cum ur a lucky man

You let out a sultry moan; body filled with warmth as the last bits of your orgasm wash over you. “You’ve been so mouthy and bratty but I wanna feel you cum too, so I’ll be nice tonight~”

Smart move, he thinks.

Raising yourself off of his cock, you let out a whimper at the emptiness you feel; pussy clenching around emptiness as you settle back down onto his thighs that are slick with your wetness. “Mmh… On second thought… Why don’t you beg a little? Lemme hear how much you wanna cum~”

He feels his cock twitch and realizes you won’t make this any easier. “Fuck, okay, p-please.... Please take the cockring off so I can cum… I--I wanna cum inside your pretty ‘lil cunt, fuck, I don’t even care if you just jerk me off just---just please take it off! I’ll t-take it easy on you tomorrow, I s-swear!” Seungcheol almost accidentally spoils his ideas for his planned camshow and he quickly bites his bottom lip before he accidentally says too much.

“That was weak but it’s okay. Dumb fucktoys don’t need to think much, do they? Only good for being used like a toy~”  You pout mockingly at him before you’re easing the cockring off of him and Seungcheol lets out a guttural moan when you immediately wrap a hand around his cock and start jerking him off.

“You weren’t very nice with your words tonight so you’ll cum with just my hand.”

“Fu--fuck, that’s fine, just let m-me cum, please!”  You work your hand up and down his shaft, giggling when you already feel his cock throbbing in your hand when you run your hand from the base to the tip.

“Cum for me, Seungcheol~”

He lets out a small whine, eyes clamped shut when he finally cums and for the first time in his life, he feels himself momentarily black out with how hard his orgasm hits him. Ropes of cum hit his chest as you work him through it, alternating the tightness of your grip on his cock as he whines and moans in return.

“Ah, you’re cumming so much this time~ You’re making such a mess!” You tease.

Seungcheol can barely hear a word you say through the ringing in his ears once his orgasm starts to ebb away and he feels himself slump against the bed as he catches his breath.

His chest rises and falls in deep breaths and he feels you leaning over him to undo the handcuffs; tired sighs on his lips as he tries to focus on you through bleary eyes. He can feel his entire body twitching and he swears his arms have. gone numb from being handcuffed to the headboard. “You’re gonna get it tomorrow, I swear…” He mutters, no real threat to his tired words. 

“Hey, you said you were gonna take it easy on me tomorrow!”

“Yeah, well...” 

tangerine_kwan: yo im excited to see the sequel to this

gc__koo: i have some… ideas

gc__koo: things r falling into place

gc__koo: my brain is expanding

hoshi_tiger_xx: i feel like its gonna be intense lol

xcaliburDK: knowing hyung…

xcaliburDK has donated $100

xcaliburDK: if u call into work on monday i wont even question it

“Here, you need to drink this, ‘Cheol!”

The said male groans as he tugs a pillow into his arms, already on the brink of sleeping when you finally end your camshow. “But ‘m tired…” He whines. “Can’t we just go to bed and clean up in the morning? The cum on my chest is already dried, it won’t get on the sheets.” You roll your eyes in return, sitting next to him on the bed.  

“Oh, so now you’re being a big baby? I’m just trying to get you to drink some water and we need to get you at least a little cleaned up for bed. You can’t go to bed like this, y’know. And anyway, we need to be in top condition for tomorrow show too. We gotta get cleaned up and eat a little something.” You laugh under your breath, shaking your head as he only whines harder. 

“C’mon, I always do it for you, right?”

He nods only once before he’s sitting up tiredly; a shaky hand reaching for the glass of water you hold out to him. You immediately take notice of the slight redness around his wrists, pouting as you help him finish the glass before setting it down onto the nightstand.

“Your wrists got so red from the handcuffs, ‘Cheol… You should’ve said something if it hurt, I would’ve taken them off…”

Seungcheol grins at you, eyes unfocused with sleepiness. “Who said it hurt? I didn’t even feel that in comparison to that horrible dry orgasm you made me experience. God, it was like… Like when you have a dream but it feels real until you try to grab for something and realize you can’t?”

The two of you share a laugh as you help Seungcheol off of the bed so that the two of you could properly get cleaned up before he flopped back down onto the sheets.

“Yeah? Trust me, that wasn't even the worst I could’ve done! You’re lucky I took it easy for my first time!”  

[guksauce]

Hiiii, I see that your still taking requests can i get a drabble /one shot of dom!Jk coming home from tour and being extremely eager to have “i missed you sex” since y/n has been teasing while he was away lol. smut and fluff i guess. Btw i love your blog and hope you are taking care of yourself 💜💜💜💜

♡OML HELLO LOML♡

♡- First I just want to say, thank you so much! It means everything to me that you’ve stuck around for my lack of posts and updates on any of the things I’ve promised to write haha I appreciate the love you continue to give, and I hope to keep making this a space where you can stay with no worries!

♡- Second: If I’m being quite honest, I’ve never written true smut before so forgive me if this stayed a little on the fluff side even when I felt like I was getting down and dirty haha It’s simple and straight forward I feel like, but I hope this is still what you wanted, Anon, even if it isn’t perfect. IM ALSO SORRY THIS TOOK ME 885583838 YEARS TO WRITE. I wanted to make sure I did it right and tastefully. I appreciate your patience!

————————

♡ Pairing: Dom!JJK x Y/n Oneshot

♡ Rating: R/NSFW

♡ Warnings: Lowkey Smut, JK being lustfully aggressive with his babe, tiny Bam cameo 👀.

♡ Word Count: (1,973)

♡ Author: @guksauce

—Don’t Say a Word—

♡ You can feel him. You can hear the gush of your own blood in your ears with every second that passes between your thoughts of him. Too many cups of coffee had passed without him. Too many walks along the river without him. Far, far too many nights in the bed you should be sharing together without him; all of them excruciating absences. So, if that door doesn't swing open in the next five minutes, you’re /going/ to explode. Even when he is home you can’t even let him be at practice for any more than a couple of hours before you go crazy missing him. Loving your best friend and being able to enjoy their company the way you enjoy his, it’s irreplaceable. And almost against your will, you find yourself becoming a stranger to yourself because you realize you don't know who you are without them. Imagine losing your epic love to a 4 month long tour.

There’s a lot that you could say about Jeon Jungkook. About his demeanor. His passion. His talents. His looks. God, don't even get you started on those looks. The ones that make your jaw drop painfully to the floor the moment they walk into anywhere ever? Yup. The ones that make you re-envision the Prince that comes to save you from your tower? Mhmm. The ones that, even though you're sure the ground beneath your feet is level and sturdy, it still shakes violently beneath you when you catch that first glimpse? Yeah, you know the ones. /Those/ looks.

Ugh, and his passions. His passions are simple. Profound but so humble. All of it drizzled in a sparkling glaze of love. In his own personal way, Love oozed out of him and laced together with every aspect of his life. His fans, his music. But especially when it comes to you.

Night after night passed, but never without a facetime. Every chance you could get, you’d make it your life's work to do anything to melt away his stresses of the day. You’d spam his phone every day with photos of you going about your daily activities and he’d make fun of how strands of your hair were in places he’d usually move them away from. You’d send him videos of Bam and yourself showing the other dogs at the park how it's done and Jungkook would all but cry telling you how much he missed you both. But on days like today, you'd adorn yourself in silken gifts and strings of diamonds and pearls he’d given you over the years, and delicately drape yourself onto the plush cushions of the couch. Your hands would find the places you knew he couldn't resist and send them to him in snapshots of lustful movements.

Videos you knew would make him twitch painfully in his jeans came in waves during the long months. But when it was time for him to come home, that's when his own videos would fly in. For all the teasing you’d done during his absence, you knew you were in BIG trouble when he'd get frustrated and promise you that he was going to “break my little slut in half when I get home.”

And so, you wait impatiently in your home. Nervously. You watched the hands on the clock hanging in the hallway with pleasurably terrified eyes tik monotonously in a circle. Another ping sounded on your phone, signifying a text that read “Don’t move a fucking muscle, pretty baby. I’m pulling in now.”

‘Slam!’ Your whole body jumps, a skittering of goosebumps prickling every inch of your skin as the door of his car shuts. The blood still gushing through your system drowns you and dots begin to cloud your vision. You want to smile but you’re almost afraid of what he’ll say if he sees it. You can hear him in your mind saying “As if you think you’re going to get away with this.”. His footsteps approach and his fingers force the door open and-

“Get up. Turn around. And don’t say a word.” Oh, fuck. In all of his glory, he stands stoic and mountainous as his bags fall around him to the floor and the door slams behind him. He might as well be glowing; a power radiating from the core of his soul with a force so potent it snaps you back to reality. His eyes are sharp and so deeply darkened, the absolute need pooled in the pitch black abyss of his irises. And then your King stalks towards you as you rise to your feet, ready to demolish your entire being.

“Baby, I-” In your mind you beg anyone who might be listening to please just let you tell Jungkook how much you love him in a way that seems good enough because you just can't seem to find words worthy of the meaning it holds. But he’s there already, jet black boots pounding the ground in his last steps, and you haven't turned around yet. Fingers find your throat as he spins your body away from him, turning the words about to spill from your lips into gargled moans.

“Didn’t I just say to turn around and not say a word? Hm?” He whispers in your ear, breath hot against the apple of your cheek as he bites at the flesh just under your diamond studded ear. His free hand dips and rises in and out of the winding curves of your body. The touch, albeit smooth and loving, sizzles your skin as he drags it down to the inside of your thigh and hooks his thumb into the hem of your black lace underwear, taking them with it. Its everything you can do not to just let everything go and lose yourself to an endless stream of pleasure filled cries. Every single miniscule detail of what he does coaxes out another gargled whimper, another knee buckling shiver down your spine.

“Mmm. Yes, sir.” You mumble out through his hold on your neck. He’s quick to reward you with a small bite to the curve of your neck where it meets your shoulder. Goosebumps dance quickly along every inch of your body as he sings a song into your skin that only your body knows. Fingers are everywhere; cupping your ass and snaking under your already disheveled shirt and god is it hard to breathe in here.

“That’s my baby.” Jungkook whispers and steals your hands from the home they’d made in his hair and grips both of your wrists in his one caring hand behind your back. The other spins you away from him and he can’t help but stop and admire the way your chest rises and falls for him, how your breath trembles and spills out from your lips, all of you excitedly and patiently awaiting him both to come home and to make you feel alive. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, my love.” You reply without a single beat of hesitation and the growl that rumbles throughout his body and erupts darkly from his throat forces a pitiful moan and your knees to buckle underneath you. Soon your cotton shirt is pulled high over your chest as he walks you both to the kitchen, Jungkooks loving bites taking on a pain that rewards him the sound of your soft mews as he bends you over the dining table, shoving plates and delicately folded napkins into the chairs.

You’re positive he’s about to split you when he runs the tips of his fingers down your spine making you struggle against the grip still tight around your wrists. That is, until he pauses, spotting a dark area forming on your bottoms. He drops to his knees, hands shaping the roundness of your cute little ass before hooking his fingers in the belt loops pulling them down where they pool around your ankles. And there he finds the mess you’ve created. With his free hand, Jungkook smacks the thickness of your ass and catches it in his grasp, giving it a good wiggle. You’re frothy; dripping your thick slick down between your thighs as he peels away your underwear. He leans closer, running the flat of his tongue over your hot core, collecting every drop of your sugary pleasure. A gasp consumes you, all four months without him making your body quiver, a string of soft obscenities flying from your mouth as you try to grind against the warmth of his tongue.

“Ah, ah, ah. You know better than that, baby.” Now you’ve done it, y/n. With one fell swoop, he spanks hard as your ass, the skin glowing red under his hand as he lines himself up with your hole, hard and already leaking.

“FUCK!” You moan out as he pushes every inch of his mass inside you with no warning or time to adjust to his size until he pulls all the way out, your hole oozing and clenching as he tangles a hand in your hair and pulls. He wastes no time slipping himself back into you with an unrelenting force that almost makes you both chuckle as the table moves an inch across the floor. But this time he doesn’t stop, smashing into you with four months worth of energy and it’s everything you can do not to just scream.

“Tell me how it feels, pretty baby.” He huffs out, drowning in love with the way you bounce yourself right back into him, eager to get every last inch, on the precipice of begging for more.

“You fuck me so good. No one loves me more than you, better than you!” You whimper out between his thrusts. He pauses, hearing your words, and releases your wrists, finding your neck instead, where he curls his fingers around your throat and lifts you up to stand. Inside you, his mass throbs in time with your heartbeat, unsteady and fast. You reach back to drag a longing touch over his hip and it changes his whole demeanor.

Pulling out of you, Jungkook let’s you rest for a moment as he turns you back to him. His eyes trace the features of your face as if he’s seeing them for the first time all over again, and with a feather light touch, presses his lips to yours and kisses you like it’s the last time he’ll ever see you. It’s slow and precise and you can’t help but step closer and loop your arms around his neck. Scooping you up in his arms, he walks you to the wall and adjusts you until your thighs rest in his arms. Kisses shower your chest, your neck, your lips as he slips himself back into you, the pressure so intense that your kisses break, the delicacy of kisses impossible to focus on when you’re both so close it hurts. His pace stays agonizingly slow. Long, perfect strokes that make his eyes droop in an angelic way makes you clench around him tight enough to elicit a low groan from the very depth of his soul as he rests his head against your chest. You curl your hands in his hair, peppering soft kisses to the top of his head between rhythmic moans.

You can’t take it anymore regardless of how much you never want it to end. You’re going to burst, literally. You can feel yourself giving way around him, dripping your frothy juices onto the floor beneath you. Jungkooks panting now, legs quivering and the muscles in his arms tightening as he whispers a gentle “I love you” into what little space there was between you.

“I love you too.” You promised as you both released, both shaking messes as he thrust 3 last, hard pumps of his love inside you, filling you to the brim.

[nyan-koii]

Hashira ft. Sabito as genshin impact players

aunotes : Bad grammar ahead! I didnt proofread it so be aware of brain damage. plus i initially wrote it at the 1.6 update

PART 1 : T.Muichiro, R.Kyojuro, K.Shinobu, S.Sanemi, U.Tengen 

Muichiro : he probably would be uninterested at first. He's more to first person shooting game or anything other than this concept of farming or investing. So that's why when he saw yuichirou banging his fist on his desk, trying to get his fav character, he would simply just watch

"Fck this game, i've had enough,"

"But you havent finish your wishing things yet,"

Stares. "How about you give it a try mui. You might get the character i want,"

"You sure about that? You might get angry at me," "better than nothing. Now go go, get em you donkey,"

His first ten pulls on the game brings out a light we all want to see

"Eh is tha-" "AAAA A FUCKING 5 STAR FCK FCKFCK,"

Apparently, it was one of the luckiest wish yuichiro had ever seen so far

"OHMYFUCK, you GOT A GODDAMN KLEE, QIQI AND SUCROSE WTFF???"

"I think i get your fav character?"

"Yeahh!! More than that to be honest. I want klee but you brought me two more person," sniffles and cries "you're really lucky mui. You should try and play the game,"

"It's probably the system. I doubt im that lucky tho,"

Nah, he really is lucky. Apparently he wished for his friends and got what they all really wanted for so long

"Thank you for getting me the aquila favonia, muichiro,"

"It's nothing really. I just simply press the button. It might be the system that's giving you the thing you want when i wish,"

"But still, even if i were to wish, i can get really scared and paranoid over it,"

"That's bad. You shouldnt invest yourself that much in the game tanjiro. It's just a game,"

"Ehehehe, i guess so. But you're really good at it muichiro! If you download it, we can play together :D!"

!!!!

It took the word "play together" to get muichiro down on his knee for that game. Usually the idea of playing with your friends is not that interesting. So when tanjiro said that, you bet he's going to play it

Type of player

Extremely lucky it's not even real. He got a five star on the beginner's banner

Fast farming. He probably will complete all the quest and become an endgame player within one month

"I just wanted to play with tanjiro..." bashfully

He's really good with whatever he's doing. Attack combo, dodging, elemental reaction and all sorts of stuff. If he invest more of his time on artifacts, he would probably even one shot it!!

He's very lucky. Very

Kyojuro : he wouldnt even know the existence of this game. Well, he took a glimpse of it one day and boom, heart stolen. Maybe it was the fiery burning passion in bennett that made him play the game.

'oh wow!! What a determined young boy! Even though he has a very bad luck he still keep pushing forward! Amazing!!'

'I want to be like him'

Kyojuro's the type of player to read and pay attention to every single lore of his fav character. Bennett, oh my how he wish he could've had bennett in his team. Every wishes he made would make him a c6 bennett main if only barbara wont stop coming home

"I really like you barbara but i dont want you!! Thank you for the c6 though!! I promise to use you in the future but just-" he prepares to wish

"not NOW!!" Clicks

The highest con of bennett he had ever gotten is probably c1. One day the paimon's bargain shop offered bennett as their monthly character. Kyojuro had never been so excited over a game before. He usually perks up over academics and not this kind of thing. But it's bennett, the character he admires the most.

Unfortunately he couldnt get it due to low currency. He had never feel so sad in his life.

"I shall not give up. Dont worry, i will be a c6 bennett main!!!"

He will be a c6 bennett haver!!

Type of player :

Carefully reads every stories and listens to their lines attentively. He finds it amazing how the company spent their everything on this game. It amazes him. From the stories, lores and lines, he truly appreciates it.

Balance his team pretty well. He mains bennett so he doesnt need that much of a healer in his team.

Enjoys bennett's hangout very much!! He tried to not get him killed by the dungeon's trap but ended up having to sacrifice him which ultimately ends the route. He had never felt so down and guilty before.

Not much of a damage dealer. He prefers to play it in normal mode and doesnt care that much about one shotting monster.

He feeds his character three meals a day!! If only there's a sleep option, he would be sending bennett to sleep first before the rest.

Everyone loves his teapot

Shinobu : found the game while she's scrolling through the app store out of boredom. Initially she played it on her phone but due to the fps and a really bad ping, so bad that douma wouldnt find her interesting anymore, she finally downloaded the game on her pc where things has starting to get real

"Ara, shinobu chan, it's lunch time already. Come downstairs please,"

"Sis give me five more minutes, JUST FIVE PLEASE I NEED TO KICK CHILDE's ASS,"

"he's not going anywhere sweetie,"

"yEAHH BUT MY BP IS,"

'Bp?'

"DIE DIE DIE!!" Aggresive clicking intensifies

"Shinobu chan dont hurt the keyboard that much!!"

She got lucky on the beginner's banner too and pulled a 5 star along with bennett and noelle. Who's the 5 star? Diluc Ragnvindr in all of his glory. Shinobu benched him sadly. She prefers sword over any other weapon

"I mean he's cool i guess but i just really dont get that 'WOAHHH COOL' vibe from him you know?"

"then give your diluc to me! I really want him so bad shinobu chan!"

Deep sighs "yeah sure. You can have my c2 diluc mitsuri..."

Loses 50/50 to diluc everytime everyone would think she either is lucky or cursed by the amount of that man greeting him on the screen. She still bench him though, sadly

"Im begging you, give me jEANN THE GRANDMASTER I NEED HEALER iN MY PARTY TO DO ABYSS

Type of player :

Suffers a lot in the abyss because she just want the primos which is a valid reason to do because that's the only thing that keeps her going

She's a sword character main. She'll properly build every character as either support or dps. The support would be kaeya and bennett, and her main dps ayaka

Ayaka main btw

Honestly at some point she wanted to quit the game because of how tiring it is but then inazuma came out

Fragile resin = 0

Resin = 160/160 happens once in a blue moon

"i should probably control myself with the amount of resin i've used,"

"But i cant,"

Hates domain but always can be seen playing in there

Only coops if mitsuri is there

"So that someone can calm me down,"

"That's not a really good reason shinobu chan,"

Sanemi : dude probably know the game through obanai. He watched the latter play and finds it interesting on how high the numbers he dealt. He loves challenges so a game like genshin impact would probably satisfy his need.

"Obanai, are you hearing this shit?"

"What is it sanemi, im busy doing this event,"

"That loser giyuu is also playing the game,"

"Oh yeah i know,"

"YOU KNOW? WHY YOU DIDNT TELL ME??"

"i just know right after you told me,"

"...."

Sanemi's a meta but a mediocre one. He's meta but he doesnt show it that much. Probably buys welkin once in every three months or when he really needs it same goes with battle pass too. Honestly, he really just use his money when he really needs something

"Donno if my allowance can buy me a welkin so i'll probably skip,"

"But the next banner is zhongli's,"

"....."

"Ah fuck it," buys

My man cant dodge after he got zhongli. Its very painful because he used to studies the enemies movement in the early game so that he can utilizes it on the team but zhongli's shield is so tank he forgot that dodging exists

"Im gonna kill you and you and you hhahaahhaah just you wait im gonna shred all of yo- oh shit zhongli's shield. puT IT BACK PUT IT BACK ON,"

That one event where zhongli's shield plays an important role in the domain? Yeah, he felt like a god at that time. Even got his c2 on his rerun. Sanemi just really like zhongli because it kinda reminds him of himejima. Calm and wise and strong too. He looks up on that kind of person

"Zhongli sama, im in debt for all of your hard work protecting my team," bows and wipes tears

Type of player :

Spends a little money on the game to get what he wants

Zhongli main

Is that one player that has hoards of food but doesnt even use it

"Why need healer when you have zhongli's shield,"

Compare to kyojuro, he doesnt even touch the teapot because he finds it ridiculous and bothersome to create and design everything in it

Loves one shotting bosses and compares it to giyuu. He ask for advices from obanai regarding team build supports and stuffs

Doesnt do character's story quest. The key is full every single time. He unlocks it but leaves the quest like that.

"Ah shit, i accidentally activate the quest,"

His friend list only has obanai in it. Whenever people sent him friend request, he wouldnt hesitate, more like wouldnt care to accept it

They either have to coop in obanai's world or his world and after that, unfriend immediately

Says thank you after coop because he has manners and then completely disappears

"Zhongli main forever,"

Tengen : played since 1.0 this madlad has been staying loyal to the game ever since. Quite huge amount of money he spend on this game to be honest but he never gets broke by it. You can see his regular donation to the game by purchasing welkin and battle pass and some genesis crystal too. He's loaded with money, he didnt know what to do with it.

Uzui also plays honkai impact and guns girl Z so when he saw the unknown god at the intro , he was not surprised.

"Oh we have to pick between the siblings? Cool cool co- oh hi kiana,"

"Thats so herrscher of void hahahahah,"

Although he is a loyal fan to MihoYo games, he lost his composure when he saw the 1st genshin anniversary reward because what was that. Imagine getting billions of money and they give us this? Tengen cant believe this shit

"Oh god wtf was that reward, i have to draw to get a welkin and some primos?? aND I ALSO HAVE TO BE LUCKY? WHAT-"

"WHERE'S MY FREE MONA,"

In need of mona. He needs mona so bad he literally spent his money on standard banner to get mona but always ends up with qiqi. Not that he's complaining but he just wants the astrologist to complete the support team

"GOD QIQI YOU AGAIN? WTF WFF WTF-" converts genesis crystal to primigems

"Tengen, you should control yourself!"

"SHUT UP KYOJURO, IM GONNA WASTE MY MONEY TILL I GET HER,"

"yeah but my f2p ass is hurting with how many bennett cons you got," droops

Tengen sees potential in every character. Everyone has their weakness and strength so when kokomi comes out, he diss her at first but then realize maybe its a new way for a character. Adds the uniqueness if he may say so.

"Meh i dont care honestly. You guys should pull whoever you find nice or beautiful. Like me ;)"

"Who do you main uzui?"

"Beidou,"

Type of player

Spoils the storylines, lores, leaks A LOT THE REST HAVE TO BLOCK HIM ON SOCIAL MEDIA

Speed runs the game and has become an endgame player ever since but he still does his daily commission and helps people with domains and stuffs

R5 every battle pass weapon

Fights azhdaha for fun and to test out his characters rather than ruin guards and stuff

Mona wanter

Puts traveller as the pfp and doesnt display any showcase of his characters and namecards. You can only see his achievements and spiral abyss ( 12-3 ). Says its for fun and mystery

Throws a lot of pickup lines and roleplays a lot. Spams your chatbox messages with stickers and censored stuffs

Probably steals your ores and exotic things like violetgrass, qingxin and silk flowers

Screams in the chatbox whenever he saw Mona until Kyojuro had to calm him down

Changes signature every single time and sometimes put spoilers in it

In every survey he would complain "MihoYo where the fuck is my Mona,"

Doesnt heals his characters

[fizzingwizard]

personal life stuff venting etc (also tmi menstruation warning)

I'm feeling ok now, but the weekend was weird.

It's been very busy at work. Like, nonstop busy, no time to sit down, no time for a break. Mostly due to people being out sick and no subs. The rest of us have to pick up the slack, etc. It's gotten worse, though, because we have had days that we literally couldn't make ratio. We are just sending teachers to different rooms during the most difficult times and dealing with the ratio being off at quieter periods... It's so difficult to get crafts and stuff done this way. Usually this is my favorite time of the school year, my kids are as grown up as they'll get, and we can have so much fun. It's still fun, but mostly it's me and my co-teachers moving frantically from one thing to another. A lot of it is due to covid, of course. Just gotta hustle.

anyway. I really wanted to be on time updating Fox this weekend, and I wanted to finish my Valentines fic too. But Idk, I was in such a weird headspace. I just hate everything I make sometimes. But when I get that way and I don't write, I tend to lose momentum. It's happened a ton in the past. So this year I made a resolution to push through with writing projects even if they suck. So that's what I did, and I finished the chapter of Fox and I finished the Valentine's fic, and I wrote the majority of both of them over the space of two days. (Which I'm sure the amount of typos can attest to :P)

But I am not in love with the new chapter, even though it's one I was really looking forward to. It just feels off. And then the Valentine's day fic. I almost deleted it four or five times. Like, "closed the document and started to drag it to the trash bin" deleted it. The whole time I was writing it I was like really?? why is this what I'm writing?? it's not that I think it's so terribly awful, but kind of uninspired.

And then I wondered... could I be about to have my period? Bc I had expected it a whole week ago and it didn't come, but I'm often a little irregular so. Idk if I can blame my weird feelings while writing on hormones, but I just felt extra irritable, extra impatient the whole time, it was really frustrating. And then this morning I was indeed sucker-punched by my period. Which doubly sucked because today was HORRIBLE in terms of getting any down time at work xP I was in so much pain. In activity time I just said to my coworker "Let's have all sixteen of them sit down at the table and do coloring pages" (which works now that they have the attention span to sit there for a while lol). We were supposed to paint our solar systems but TOO BAD, Fizz's uterus has mutinied, she needs to freaking sit down for five min without getting up because someone dropped a spoon or bumped their head or needs to go to the toilet right this very second yadda yadda

also this weekend i got to video chat with both my parents at the same time. and boy that was weird. not gonna go into it right. but since the divorce any time we talk separately it feels bad. but they were hanging out together for the superbowl and it felt the same as when i was a kid. actually im tearing up now typing this. during the call i kept thinking how their divorce completely upended how i felt about marriage and relationships, and now seeing them together with things seeming so much the same even though they're so different is freaking me out all over again in a different way. thats neither here nor there but may also have been a factor in why my weekend was weird. by the way yeah im an adult and im behaving like a petulant kids re: my parents' divorce. i know i know.

anyway so I do think maybe hormones were part of it. but im also just generally feeling bad about writing lately. maybe its just that i hadnt done it for a good while, and when i finally got back into it was like a honeymoon period, and now im like wait this is supposed to be fun little escapism. i literally had to bargain with myself back in june when i posted my first fic in ages that i was going to write whatever i wanted, regardless of what other people thought of it, even if it was massively unpopular. i was going to be one hardass mofo who didnt give a shit. welp. unfortunately im still me lol. i know i can just rewrite the bits of those fics i dont like, im just frustrated that right now, i go in to edit and cant think of anything, its like my heads in a fog. words? i know some? haha. gonna keep blaming it on hormones tho.

this is just a vent post so no one take it too seriously. also i know these whiny posts about extremely small problems sound self-centered and are annoying so sorry about that. if i were smart id delete every post in my personal tag. i wont say im never self-centered but makes me feel better to write it down, and putting it on my blog so it's "out there" even if not a single person reads it (i dont really want anyone to, lol) makes it feel less locked away than just writing something private, if that makes sense.

as always im also absolutely swimming in blessings to the point that its seriously ridiculous i feel sad at all. but that's life. anyway i will get over it, probably by next week, lol

just noticed i stopped capitalizing things halfway thru haha

[vaguely-concerned]

The Mandalorian Chapter 12 Reactions: Mando goes on a self care sidequest with friends and now the Razor Crest can fly again

- before we talk about ANYTHING else I have to mention once again: 

shut UP they have a statue for IG-11 in the town square!!!!! right outside the school like he’s guarding it!!! I am  c r y i n g

- that opening scene was Everything; I have had exactly this type of conversation with my dad so many times when I was a kid and he was fixing up our about-to-fall-apart house (though he’s an electrician so he wouldn’t have let me within fifteen kilometers of anything electrical that was still powered lol. it’s okay tho let’s just assume that star wars tech has extra fail safes for these things that we don’t, the baby is clearly fine)  

callout post for Din Djarin: does not own furniture, literally sits on a crate in the middle of the cargo hold to eat dinner, has presumably been living like this for decades, help him 

them sipping soup perfectly in sync 😭😭😭 (for some reason I find it so funny that din lifts up and then lowers the helmet for every mouthful fsaldkfhjsadfh it’s such a... I almost want to say dainty? way of doing it and my heart is full of so much affection)   

I wonder if they’ve been eating together like this for a while or if it’s din doing just a tiny bit of testing his boundaries now that he knows there are different schools of thought on the helmet thing to see how he feels about it? the baby is extremely curious, but that could also be because he’s seen people take the  helmet off completely now and made the connection that presumably his dad has a face above the chin under there too lol 

-

grandpa greef... things I didn’t know I needed but am delighted to get

the way the mando music goes soft and relaxed and almost playful when din spots greef and cara? fcking kills me ludwig göranson going for my throat once again

 - 

“hmmm why isn’t this working... the puppy eyes usually work on dad eventually this is unprecedented & concerning” 

a baby committing baby crimes through the force and getting away with it mostly scot-free... delightful, wonderful in every way    

‘batuu!’ ;_________; baby has a word for food?

- 

din’s Dad Instincts kicking in... I’m emotional over how casually protective he is with things like this, and that he showed signs of it even before meeting the baby (he’s also the last one to stay behind on the platform to make sure the rest of them make it out safely before they start running.... your honor im love this man more than anything he is Dad)

that soft steady protective-but-not-possessive masculinity baBEY 

- I am entranced by the difference between din’s fighting style in the last episode -- when he was continually on the back foot and out of sync with the people he fought with -- and in this episode, where he’s back in one man army mode. (he does take on sort of a protective role when he fights with friends -- he’s not quite fighting with them all the time he’s more like a shepherding dog circling them and making sure they’re okay lol) turns out he fights much better with -- for! -- people he actually trusts and knows and likes and who aren’t manipulating him huh :)   

- the mythrol dude says in the first episode that he’s a ‘fledgling’, and it makes everything about him so much funnier when you assume he’s his species equivalent of a teenager/twentysomething fsdfsdjkfhsd (he oh so 100% sold din out at the beginning there tho :( the most charitable interpretation is that he didn’t quite know the scope of it -- he did seem just as surprised as the rest of them that gideon isn’t dead, so maybe he thought that weird alien mechanic dude wanted to know about the crest for more mundanely nefarious reasons?)

they are kind of shitty towards him tho I feel a bit bad for him haha 

- at least din knows moff gideon is still alive now and can take appropriate precautions as far as possible? on the other hand he doesn’t know about the tracker and I am so scared help  

- man I wish gina carano wasn’t such a godawful person so I could appreciate cara dune’s overarms and interesting character development in peace but as it stands... yeah 

- @ all the people whining about when we get to ahsoka... meet me in the ring for dishonorable combat I am smol and sort of skinny these days but I have decades of pent up rage and no compunctions about fighting dirty on my side lol 

listen... I love ahsoka as much as the next person, but we already have two shows’ worth of content for her. just let me have my thirty minutes a week of slice of life dad and baby nonsense without it being overshadowed by Plot and more established characters okay (and also if the rumours are right about who is going to play her... double  y e a h  that’s going to be fun to navigate emotionally :/)    

- I actually really liked that they went back to nevarro to answer some old questions (where did those empire dudes even come from?? what’s going on with pershing and why am I so weirdly happy to see him again when clearly he is bad news??? what do they need the baby for exactly? how are cara and greef but mostly greef now sadly doing?) and update that whole storyline a bit, while opening even more questions. also stop midichlorian-counting yodito’s blood you fucking creeps

the (likely) midichlorian mention didn’t bother me that much because this show already thrives on the tension between the mythic and mystical and the weirdly mundane and realistic, it’s the one star wars thing I trust to handle the Force the same way without losing the magic of it

- seeing the armorer’s forge like that was honestly upsetting to me haha, I know the forge isn’t what makes her what she is but still 

-

greef karga is a huge bitch and I like him so much

I do like greef’s character growth, though -- it feels a bit like some older and more idealistic (well comparatively) part of him has finally gotten out from under the empire’s boot and restored itself, it’s sweet. he’s doing administrative things that have the whole town blooming! there are plants and living things thriving there now! he wants to establish a safe trading hub!

- f for this poor harried new republic officer, captain carson teva, who along with trapper wolf is apparently responsible for policing the entire outer rim haha

I like the complicated tension between him and the other characters here -- both sides have very good reasons to hold the points of view they do and it’s easy to see why it’s so hard for them to work together but at least this guy is trying to be fair about it     

- the way they all immediately agreed when din went straight into ‘get. baby. NOW everything else is secondary’ dad mode and let him go off on his own even tho he would probably have been real useful to have around T______T friendshipppp 

baby FINALLY strapped in securely I gave a little shout of triumph haha

the way he was like ‘free cookies! (everything’s free if you steal it #baby yoda life hacks) helping dad with stuff! high speed dog fights! BEST! DAY! EVER!’ through the whole scene right up until he was finally sick but it’s okay because dad is here and will fix it even while he’s driving... don’t even look at me I can’t 

- din being in a much more stable and happy place after going to friends for help (and the way it’s reflected in his ship! my theory still stands strong haha)....... mngh im not crying give this man some community he so clearly needs it 

[bangtanloverboys]

part 30 // happy circumstance

series: good bad choices

pairing - stoner!yoongi x good girl!reader

genre - fluff

word count - 1.6k

warning - nothing

author’s note - im so so so so so sorry for not updating for a while, classes got busy. but i’m back! new part! let me know what you guys think!!

“Y/N, you’ve been in there for 15 minutes. You doing alright?” You heard Yoongi through the bathroom door you’ve locked yourself in.

“Al-almost!” You responded as you turned on the sink to splash water in your face for the fifth time. You’ve been trying your best to mentally prepare yourself for what was going to happen, for talking with Namjoon finally about his actions and how he’s made you feel the past several weeks. Taking a deep breath, you stared yourself down in the mirror. Gathering the small bit of courage you had tucked away, you shut the water and opened the door. “Ready.”

“You sure?” Yoongi questioned, no doubt sensing your anxieties as his hand moved to grasp yours. 

“Yeah, just nervous I suppose.” 

“Okay, remember that you agreed to talk to him. You made no promises to let him back into your life.” He gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, “This is going to help.”

You nodded, his words echoing in your head as he started leading you down the hall towards the front door. You agreed to meet Namjoon at a cafe not far from your apartment, so you and Yoongi decided on walking there. Usually you like the silence of walking around with Yoongi, giving you peace of mind and not having to fill it with small talk. But the quiet only made your nerves stand more on edge. 

When you got to the doors of the cafe, you could see Namjoon through the glass, anxiously checking his phone. It was your first time seeing him in person in a while, he looked practically the same yet something was off about him. His clothes looked rumpled and he was antsy, his hand tapping on the table. You swear you could hear the tip tip tip of his fingernail against the wood. 

Wrapping your hand around the handle of the door, you pulled it open, warm air of the coffee shop enveloping you as you walked in. Immediately, Namjoon met your eyes and frantically got to his feet. He gave you a stiff smile before waving his hand to beckon you closer. You couldn’t move though, you tried to move but it felt like you were glued to the spot on the floor. The mere sight of Namjoon has you frozen, you wanted to turn on your heels and walk right out the door. You couldn’t do this. It was better to leave things alone and over time the pain of losing your oldest friend will fade. Right? 

However, you felt your hand receive a gentle squeeze as Yoongi leaned down to whisper in your ear, “You’re going to be alright, you can do this.” Your head whipped around to face him, and he was giving you a small smile as he nodded his head in Namjoon’s direction. “Come on.”

You meet Namjoon’s eyes again and you see a twinge of fear. He must’ve been hurting as much as you had. With a sigh, you made your way toward him, Yoongi following a step behind. 

“H-Hey, Y/N.” Namjoon moved to hug you, but before he could even wrap his arms around you, you stopped him. 

“We’re here to talk,” you reminded him. You may not admit it, but you really did want to hug him at that moment. But the thought of hugging him and acting like nothing had happened wasn’t the way this was supposed to go. You needed to get straight to the point.

“Right,” his arms fell back to his sides, “please. Sit.” He gestured down to the two seats opposite of him. Yoongi pulled out your chair to help seat you, before sitting down beside you. The three of you sat in awkward silence, save for the continuous buzzing of the coffee shop surrounding you. “So, uh, you must be Yoongi.” Namjoon said, breaking the silence and reaching his hand over the table towards your boyfriend.

“Yeah,” he met Namjoon’s hand, shaking it firmly. “I wish we could’ve met under a better circumstance.” He quipped as he pulled back, your eyes quickly darted towards Namjoon who seemed to have been put off by the statement. 

“I- Right,” his head fell to look down at his lap. “I would like to apologize for that.” He started, “Despite the fact we’ve never met, I judged you harshly and said a few rude things to you. I’m sorry.”

“But why, Namjoon?” You questioned, now the attention of both of them is on you. “I went over every little thing I said about him and you- you just hated him. Even for things I told you were my decisions, you blamed him.” As you went on, Namjoon said nothing. He didn’t try to speak over you, or interject, he let you say your part before opening his mouth again.

“Y/N,” he sighed, “I know.”

Underneath the table, your hand went to grab Yoongi’s. His statement scared you, he knew what he was doing? You held your breath as he continued. 

“At first, it was with genuine concern. When he answered your phone that night and then you saying you smoked. . . I’ll admit the worst case scenario came to mind,” he shifted awkwardly in his seat, avoiding looking at Yoongi in the eyes. Yoongi however, remained calm and didn’t say a word, letting him go on. “I thought it was just going to be a one time thing though, that you’d be over it and never see him again. But it didn’t and the more you hung out with him, I-I got jealous.”

“Jealous?” You furrowed your brows as you tried to meet his gaze, but he looked away. “What would you have to be jealous of? You’re my friend, I don’t- Oh.” You couldn’t believe how you missed it, how obvious it almost seemed now. The way he jumped at any moment to your side whenever you asked, the vague tweets, it all made sense. “Namjoon, I-”

“Don’t.” He stopped you, finally meeting your eyes. “Don’t say anything. It was wrong of me to take my jealousy out on you. I said a bunch of things I didn’t mean because I let my feelings get the best of me. I know it’s not a real excuse, but I’m sorry. I truly am. To both of you, I hope you both can forgive me. But I understand if you don’t.” Namjoon finished, bowing his head. 

You glanced over to Yoongi, unsure of what to say. When he met your gaze, he gave your hand a reaffirming squeeze. Reminding you of what he had been telling you all this time, no promises were made or have to be made today. 

“Joon,” you watched as his eyes flashed at his nickname. “I forgive you but I can’t promise that I’ll let you back, at least not yet. But thank you for the apology.” A tight smile formed on his lips as he nodded his head in understanding. 

“Namjoon,” his attention turned to Yoongi, who spoke at last. “We got off on the wrong foot, but I think you’re alright. I hope we can get to know each other properly, if time allows it.” His hand reached out to Namjoon’s across the table for another handshake. He was a bit in awe for a second, but he took his hand and returned it. 

“Thank you,” he smiled as Yoongi released his hand. The three of you sat there for a moment longer, sitting in silence before the air around them began to feel awkward. “I uh,” he coughed as he gathered his few things as he stood, “I should go. Got an exam to study for.”

“Oh, yeah. Good luck!” You responded as he bade you two goodbye. Soon enough, he was out of the cafe leaving you and Yoongi alone at the table. “Wow, that was. . . unexpected.” You confessed.

“Which part? Because I found him apologizing to me, unexpected.” He replied as he relaxed more into his chair, now that the awkward tension in the air was gone.

“Him liking me, that’s just- I never thought he liked me like that.”

“I noticed.”

“You what?!” His admission took you off guard. “H-How? You never met him, or talked to him before?” You questioned him as he chuckled at your reaction. 

“I mean, I had a suspicion. Him getting mad at you for going out with me, for starters.” He explained, his eyes trained on your still locked hands. “He also blurted it out when I texted him-”

“You texted him? Why?” You felt your face begin to burn red with embarrassment, did Namjoon think you sent your boyfriend after him to leave you alone? Is that why the messages suddenly stopped?

“Don’t worry,” he met your eyes with his loving gaze, “I made sure that he knew it was coming from me, not you. All I said was how he doesn’t know me or my intentions with you, and that if he cared about you, he'd let you come to him.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because I noticed that clearly what happened between you two still affected you, I don’t like seeing you upset.” He shrugged. “Plus, I figured since I’m the cause of all this I had to do my part in cleaning it up.”

“No, no, Yoongi, it’s not your fault at all.” You turned to grab his other hand and squeezed it gently. “Every choice I made was mine, you just happened to be uh- a happy circumstance?”

“A happy circumstance?” He raised his eyebrows at the statement, not believing you at all. “I thought I was more than that, alright.” 

He began to feign getting up, “Hey!” You pulled him back down by his hands. He looked back at you with a smile pulling at his lips. The sight had you giggling in return you leaned forward to press a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you.” 

“Anytime, angel. Anytime.”

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