#but with the added bonus of medically-related anxiety

[copperbadge]

So the ADHD Handbook post struck a chord with a lot of people...

I don't think I have it in me to write the book I suggested, mainly because most of what I want to write about is variable by situation. I can't actually offer a magic formula for getting a good assessment, all I would be able to do is say "Here are the warning signs, here's my personal story, shit's just rough". Which I could do but it'd be basically an entire book of "shrug emoji". The best possible way would probably be to offer it as a workbook, like "Here is a page for you to record every communication with the clinic doing your testing. Here is a page for you to write down possible other approaches to getting your medication if the pharmacy is out." etc.

I do think I might write it as a novel of some kind. Possibly even a novel about someone writing a handbook, I haven't decided. I had a dream last night about the book, in which I saw a woman watching a revolution taking place in the distance, thinking, "This is not what I intended when I set out to write a self-help book." Baller way to start a novel, honestly.

Anyway there were several suggestions for books in the notes, so I thought I'd compile those here. I have read none of these, so I can't vouch for their contents, but I'm including what my readers said about them.

@blogquantumreality linked to How To ADHD by Jessica McCabe, who is a well-known ADHD youtuber (I haven't found her videos super helpful but they're also not aimed at me). @knitsinweirdplaces added "The last section of the How to ADHD book is literally called 'how to change the world' and exactly points out we can advocate for a more disability friendly world that traumatizes ADHDer less in the first place. It's the only book I've read that hits the balance of 'your brain has immutable challenges' and 'these strats may help' right. Bonus, it is inclusive of people who use adhd meds and those who don't/can't."

@theindefinitearticle mentioned "I read how to keep house while drowning recently and it's been much more practical for me in terms of actual usable advice." This book has also come up numerous times during National Clean Your Home Month as a helpful guide to cleaning.

@buginateacup said "The year I met my brain is the only one I've read that actually felt like it was making useful suggestions for living with ADHD."

@cabloom said "iampayingattention on Instagram wrote How Not To Fit In."

@grison-in-space said "Do you have any idea how over the top excited I was when I found I Overcame My Autism and All I Got Was This Lousy Anxiety Disorder?"

@doubleminorforroughing wrote "Please read Devon Price. He wants to tear it all down and I love it." I will add that I don't think I've read Laziness Does Not Exist but I have read Price's shortform work extensively and I think he's been very influential in rethinking how we frame laziness and productivity in relation to both work and neurodivergence, so I can second the recommendation.

[2hoothoots]

So I was going through your blog (again) and found some of your stuff mentions fsau Raz having ADHD, as somebody with adhd I’m intrigued, may I have some of those headcanons (canons??) related to that? Also, I would give “a penny for your thoughts” but I’m out of pennies, so here’s various images of a drawing of ur blorbo I put next to my animals, note that a rock had to be added in one picture to keep him from flying away (BONUS: his now permanent place with the wifi guardian frog)

NOTHING brings me more joy than seeing physical drawings of these guys, like, out and about. in situations. thank you for this gift, and ALSO for the great ask because it's a perfect chance to ramble

so first of all, canon Raz having ADHD is very real to me. he's constantly fidgeting and moving around, getting distracted by sidequests and scavenger hunt objectives, always talking to himself out loud, gotta write everything down so he remembers it because there's so much to DO!, running away from home because his dad yelled at him one time and now Raz assumes he must hate him forever... i could go on, but i think there's a lot of room for interpretation there!

in my headcanon, he never got diagnosed as a kid. maybe there were some notes about it in his reports each year, sure - but a little hyperactivity and distractability never seemed to slow him down. he excelled in lessons and on missions, and when he was with his family their performances gave him something to focus that energy into. it was only really when he turned 18 and graduated to a full agent that the cracks started to show.

because there's a big difference between the responsibilities you have as a minor, and the responsibilities you have as an 18-year-old living away from home! one who's expected to cook and clean for themselves, and take care of adult life stuff, and also work the 9-to-5 office job he's just graduated into that involves sitting in front of a computer and write reports all day.

short-term, he found he could get himself to power through a deadline with energy drinks and psi-pops (a lot of psi-pops...)

long-term, something had to give. he was working himself to exhaustion, constantly stressed, swinging between days spent staring at his computer screen doing nothing and all-nighters desperately trying to finish his paperwork before the deadline. it just didn't make any sense to him. he'd finally started his job as a Psychonaut, he was living independently like he'd always dreamed, he'd gotten top surgery after planning it for so long. he should have everything he ever wanted. why wasn't he happy?

following a deep post-surgical depression, about a month before his 19th birthday Raz was living out of his car, couch-surfing or sleeping in his office. he got kicked out of his apartment after falling behind on bills and rent. it wasn't that he didn't have the money, it was all just too much for him to stay on top of.

he'd probably have stayed in that misery hole for a lot longer if Frazie hadn't marched into his life and demanded he let her help him move into a new place, or she was telling mom that he was homeless. together, they sorted through all of his possessions from the last place - everything that had been hastily shoved in his car, or tossed in a box in his office, piled in a heap that was giving him anxiety even looking at it.

things do get better for him from there.

when he eventually explains things to Hollis, she gently suggests that he should get a roommate. he ends up moving in with Phoebe, and they become pretty good friends after a couple months! something about having another person around to help do the chores and wash the dishes and share the space helps, even if it takes him a while to admit it.

he gets his ADHD diagnosis, and finding the exact right medication and dose is a journey he's still on years later - but they're a huge help in getting him to actually knuckle down and finish his work on time. and the whole thing ends up being a chance for him to take a step back and really think about what he wants to do with his life. he'd always assumed that being a Psychonaut was his dream, but he'd never really reckoned with what that dream would look like before.

in the end, he sticks with it, but also decides to follow Lili's example in branching out. he applies to study a part-time Bachelor's in Psychology on a remote course, and gets accepted. juggling missions and paperwork and study and relationships (because the whole thing made him realise he also wasn't setting aside any time for himself, and wow, dating is a thing) is a lot - but he manages to figure it out, day by day.

(Lili comes back to the Psychonauts after graduating. she and Raz have both changed a lot over those four years, but on their first mission together they hit it off like a house on fire - and the rest is history!)

[honeysuckleharringtons]

Part One: "Double Shot" ~ S. Harrington

Summary: (Then) In the small town of Hawkins, Indiana lies the Byers family, a family of four who might just be gaining a fifth member of the family. — (Now) Brew and Me, known for its punny motto and delicious coffee, might soon be known for bringing people together in unexpected ways.

Pairing: Nurse!Steve Harrington x Fem!Byers!Reader

Word Count: 1,808

Content Warning: teen pregnancy, small mention of abortion, vomit/morning sickness talk, mild swearing, mentions of food, mentions of medical-related things (not detailed, just mentioned), lmk if i missed anything!

Extra Notes: thank you to @dungeons-are-too-cold and @heartshapedhargrove for constantly listening to me talk about this series, i love y'all sm

Originally Written: 10/16/2023

honeysuckleharringtons' masterlist can be found here!

'brew and me' series masterlist can be found here!

[ Then, June of 1987 ]

Hawkins was a quaint little town, just about an hour and a half outside of Indianapolis. Hop on the interstate and drive northwest for a while, and soon enough, you'd be met with luscious sugar maples and winding back roads into a small town filled with big families. That's where you'd find the Byers', a family of four who lived near the outskirts. But for the four of them, things were about to change in a very big way.

"It's okay," you whispered to yourself, a gentle reminder that, quite frankly, you were having a hard time believing. "It's just a little pregnancy test. It can't hurt you."

The test itself might not have been capable of inflicting pain on you, but whatever results it bore to you a half hour later might. The visionary knife in your gut twisted at the thought of the test lighting up with a positive. You willed yourself not to think of it, afraid of somehow speaking it into existence despite the words not leaving your mouth.

A knock rapped against the bathroom door, startling you from your current train of thought. "Honey," Joyce called on the other side, "dinner's almost finished."

"Yeah, Mom," you managed to stutter out, attempting to mask the anxiety coursing through you. "I'm just gonna shower and then I'll be out."

You felt slightly bad that you'd be wasting all the available hot water for the next half hour, but you couldn't risk someone coming in and finding the test. The distraction a shower would bring you would be an added bonus.

As soon as your mother’s footsteps receded down the hardwood hallway, you got to work. After looking over the instructions at least five times and then managing to open the wrapper with trembling fingers, you finished the test. A couple nervous breaths exited your lips as you placed the stick on the counter, then promptly hopped in the shower. Attempting to wash away all the messiness of the day—but not the messiness of your thoughts—you let the water cascade down your body, the warmth of it lacking its usual sense of comfort.

As your fingers combed shampoo through your hair, thoughts ran rampant through your mind. Y/N Byers, a mother. Even if the title made you a bit hesitant, at least it would finally give your boyfriend a reason to grow the hell up, right? You loved him, truly, but that boy certainly needed a reality check.

You forced yourself to look at the upside of things. For one, you'd had plenty of training. Between your younger brother and babysitting throughout your teen years, you definitely knew enough to at least get by. Your current gig as a day-camp counselor at The Peony, the local country club, was just the cherry on top. For two… were there any more positives of this?

While you wanted to see a good side to the situation, you couldn't help but consider the possibilities of getting kicked out of the house, being forced to break up with your boyfriend, and the decision of even keeping the baby or not. Your stomach twisted at the thought of being homeless and your baby being fatherless. A wave of nausea hit you so hard you were nearly puking in the shower, a pain so horrid that morning sickness could surely never compare.

You rushed out of the shower, not even bothering to grab a towel before emptying what little was left in your stomach into the toilet. Your eyes glared up at the test on the counter as you wiped off your chin with a piece of toilet paper. It was almost funny, you thought, that a tiny white stick could be holding the answer to your future.

Forcing yourself up from the cold tiles under your knees, you managed to reach the shower and finish the rest of your nightly routine. Your hands shook as you gripped the nob, wondering if this would be the last shower you took before your final step into womanhood.

You had to remind yourself how to breathe as you reached for the test, giving yourself one last look in the mirror. Your skin was some shade of pale green, nausea coursing through you as naturally as the blood in your veins. Here goes nothing.

Blue. The test lit up the brightest shade of blue. It might as well have been screaming, "You're pregnant, dumbass!"

The test fell from your hands and into the sink, the device practically staring at you. Another wave of nausea hit you, forcing you to sit down on the cold and wet edge of the tub. As your exhausted hand ran through your hair, you sifted through the millions of thoughts fighting for your attention.

Another soft knock sounded against the door, one of your brothers reminding you that dinner was finished. Maybe you answered, "I'll be out in a minute," or maybe you didn't manage to say anything at all. You really weren't sure because all the blood in your body rushed straight to your ears to the point where you couldn't even hear yourself breathing anymore. Maybe you'd passed out and this was all a strange fever dream. You really, truly, didn't know.

In fact, in the midst of your internal battle, there was really only one thing you were positive about: you had no idea what the hell you were going to do.

[ Now, November of 1991 ]

"Welcome to Brew and Me, where our motto is- Oh, it's you." You sighed heavily as you registered who was standing on the other side of the counter.

Steve just stared at you with his eyebrow raised. "I'm not sure I'm familiar with your motto. Can you remind me again, miss?"

Your eyes nearly rolled out onto the counter. "The usual?" you asked reluctantly, hands on your hips as you all but challenged his request.

He pushed his wire-frame glasses up the bridge of his nose, a hand landing on his hip in rebuttal. You'd never seen another human being as joyful as Steve was when he got the opportunity to mock you. "That's not the motto," he reminded you in a sing-song tone.

All interest in fighting left your body, finally giving in to his wish. "It's always a brew-tiful day for coffee," you forced out.

His lips turned downward into the cutest pout, and your heart swooned at the sight. "You should really work on how you express-o yourself. That was just sad."

Steve knew his slip of the tongue would make your blood boil, and his pout quickly turned to a smirk as he watched annoyance wash over your face. "The word is espresso, and I'll have you know that I have been considered one of the happiest coworkers here so take that."

He snickered at your sad attempt at a fight. "I find that incredibly hard to believe," he countered. "To answer your previous question, yes, I'd like my usual. Double shot tonight."

A flash of sympathy appeared on your face. You knew all too well what he was in for. "Long night?"

"Exam in the morning, clinical tonight."

You gave him a sympathetic smile before turning to your coworker to bark out his order. "Hazelnut Americano with double shots for John Lennon!"

"Someday," he said, his eyes narrowing in on you as you struggled to hold in your laugh, "you're gonna realize that these glasses are one of my best features. And then, you will finally agree to that date with me."

You just shook your head, waving him off toward his favorite table in the house. A small smile crept its way to your lips, but you did your best to hide it. Your heart went aflutter at even the simplest of actions from him.

Steve Harrington could be described as the most attractive man alive, but just as easily be described as the most stubborn one in the same breath. Sure, he had beautiful, tousled brown hair and hazel eyes that you could get lost in if he'd allow it. Add in the way he looked in his uniform slate-gray scrubs and you were done for. But on the opposite hand, Steve also didn't know how to take no for an answer. Still, you found it quite endearing that three months in, he was still very interested in that date he brought up every time he came into your little coffee shop.

The devil on your shoulder practically begged you to say yes—yes to Steve, yes to the whole nine yards that came along with dating him, all of it. But the idea of actually saying it? Well, to be frank, it scared you more than anything in the whole world. Still, you couldn't help but wonder what it might be like if you ever did accept. His hair fixed up the right way, scrubs traded in for slacks and a nice sweater… your heart flipped at the thought.

That was when that devil sitting on your shoulder decided to do the most devious thing. You didn't really believe in 'out of body' experiences, but it was the only logical explanation to why your feet had carried you over to his table all on their own.

You'd never have the courage to say what was coming out of your mouth, but your little demon friend surely did. "Tell you what, doc?" you started, leaning down and narrowing your eyes at him. "When you successfully guess my favorite thing on the whole menu—without help from any of my coworkers, classmates, or professors—then we'll talk."

Steve just stared at you, mouth agape, for the remainder of the time it took one of your fellow baristas to whip up his coffee. Some mix of shock and fear of disappointment sat on his face for so long that you headed back to the counter, grabbing his coffee and a sympathy cookie from the display while you waited for him to come back to life. When he still didn't respond, you did the only thing left—say the motto and continue on with your work.

"Have a brew-tiful day, friend," you said, much more enthusiastically than earlier. You glanced down at your watch, noticing it was almost time for your break. You were tempted to sit at his table just to see how long it would take him to form another coherent sentence.

Finally, he spoke again, slowly coming out of his dazed state. "You…" he hesitated, possibly trying to think up an intelligible string of words from that dictionary he always carried with him for no apparent reason. "You said yes…"

"I did," you confirmed. "And I hate to rush off, but I have to take my break."

"You said yes," he repeated, pure shock coming over him. "Huh. I guess it really is a brew-tiful day."

AAAHHH, MY BABY IS OUT INTO THE WORLD 🥹

I don't think anyone understands how happy I am for you guys to finally get this series. Like, I have been shaking in my boots, waiting to post this for you guys and now you have it!!! 🥹

Thank you so very much to Georgia (tagged in the extra notes at the top) for listening to me talk about this series sm and for helping me brainstorm so many lil things for this series. I love you so very much, my bestie 💞

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed and I can't wait to see you guys back here for part three next weekend! 🫶🏻

-> taglist: @dungeons-are-too-cold @ducky-died-inside @awkotaco24 @liberhoe @princesseddie @aftermidnightwriting @manuosorioh @esoltis280

[screen-universe-official-thingie]

Plague Doctor Cindy!

Hi, I drew this concept art sheet thing shortly after drawing the Butcher!Aurora art and I took a break after that. Sorry I didn't post this one immediately.

Edit: Some close ups and extra commentary have been added

Rambling below (TW: medical subject matter like diseases and surgery, death, delusions, and cannibalism)

Meta wise, she started out as a mad scientist for the sake of being a mad scientist by listening to Novocaine by Cree-P and GHOST, and Black Box Warrior-OKULTRA by Will Wood. I just imagined Cinderella going too hard or harsh on Lady Tremaine, her patient/ser-worker/co-star, with her research, experiments, and surgeries out of frustration, stress, and madness. Hell, I would not be surprised if she tried lobotomy at some point during her side jig/job as a doctor.

But ever since I listened to Butcher Vanity by Vane and Flavour Foley, Cinderella later grew to be more than just a plain old mad doctor as I revisited her Screen Universe para concept and explore what her deal is. From why exactly did she fall into this path, to her relationships with the characters related or relevant to her story. She became another tragic character. This time, someone who developed an obsession with finding a cure for the prions after it "ate up" her once villain co-worker friend with in-character or canon compliant delusions.

Some close ups

The other state was meant to say production as well, but I'm too lazy to fix the typo now

Cindy with the Bok-su pose is slightly cursed ngl, but it keeps living in my head rent free. The fact that they're both doctors doesn't make it any better ToT

Eldritch Cinderelly (the note says healthy because their true forms's color and brightness changes if they get certain health conditions. In this one, she should have been a bit dimmer and grayer due to the Discontinuation Rot)

Herbs and spices stuffed in the beak like a true plague doctor. Though, Cindy does this for different reasons. Instead of the original reasoning where the herbs will ward off the plague, she does this to replace the smell of burning and rotting flesh with as much fragrance as possible. It also puts her at ease

Stolen Ideas Inspo :>

How it'd look like under her apron/dress thing

Goggles stuff for eye protection

Eyes. Eye eyeballed (eh? eh?) her eye color because I can not find a good proper close up of her face and eyes in the official material and the coloring in the og movie looks a bit inconsistent at times.

Screen shots from the ID server itself again of course

OKULTRA cranking up the mad doctor inspiration (ft. Novocaine starting the whole thing prior to listing to OKULTRA)

I think this one is still pre-butcher vanity arc

meme

Typical Disney para behaviour

more Cinderella angst lore because yes

A shit ton of other paras have not so healthy relationships with their characters at this point. They include, but not limited to some Pokemon characters, and SpongeBob.

Health anxiety go brrrr

This is from when Butcher Vanity arc or obsession hit around. It expanded her lore and everything. It was a game changer for this specific para tbh. I think this is about four months after posting the past Cindy rambles shown in the previous screenshots

Ok, this one is from an ID adjacent server, but I feel like this is still a bit relevant to the whole thing

(Also from the ID adjacent server) Ok, this one is kinda complicated since I mentioned another para who had something to do with a different Disney centered subplot that somehow affected the plot and lore of the entire paracosm. Basically, Snow White helped one of her ser-workers to found a cult and... everything went downhill and batshit insane from there. Ruined or fucked over the entire government and all... you may either dig through my casual account for the answer or ask through the Screen Universe blog about it.

Bonus: A joke relevant to the whole Cinderella x Sleeping Beauty ft. prion plague debacle arc/subplot (I found this god damn image from Pinterest and I captioned it as "Cinderella and Aurora")

TLDR: 1950 Disney princess becomes a mad plague doctor, grows into another tragic para, becomes vegan as a trauma response, loses her villain patient to the plague's delusions, goes off into a deep end after burning said patient, despises cannibals, and turns into their world's equivalent to a veteran in a "has seen the origins of modern day problems and the horrors of war" way but the war is the plague from the distant past.

[sweatytyphoondinosaur]

Home Remedies for Dog Biting Tail: Natural Solutions to Stop the Habit

🐾 Is your furry friend caught in a tail-chasing frenzy? Discover natural solutions to stop your dog from biting their tail! 🐶

Welcome to Natural Home Remedies, where we explore gentle, effective ways to care for your pets. Today, we're diving into a common canine conundrum: dogs biting their tails. This behavior can be frustrating for pet owners and uncomfortable for our four-legged companions. Let's wag away those worries with some tried-and-true home remedies!

Understanding the Issue

Before we fetch our solutions, it's important to understand why dogs might engage in tail-biting behavior. Common causes include:

Allergies and Skin Irritations: Itchy skin can drive dogs to nibble their tails. Parasites: Fleas, ticks, or mites might be the culprits behind the biting. Anxiety or Boredom: Sometimes, tail-chasing is a sign of stress or lack of stimulation. Injury or Pain: Your dog may be responding to discomfort in their tail or hindquarters.

Natural Home Remedies to the Rescue! 🌿

1. Soothing Oatmeal Bath 🛁

An oatmeal bath can provide relief for itchy skin. Blend a cup of plain, unflavored oatmeal into a fine powder and mix it into warm bathwater. Let your dog soak for 10-15 minutes, then rinse and dry thoroughly.

2. Coconut Oil Magic ✨

Coconut oil has natural anti-inflammatory and antimicrobial properties. Gently massage a small amount onto your dog's tail area. Not only will it moisturize the skin, but it may also deter parasites.

3. Apple Cider Vinegar Spray 🍎

Create a 50/50 mixture of apple cider vinegar and water in a spray bottle. Apply this solution to your dog's tail area to help balance pH and soothe irritated skin. Avoid using on open wounds or raw skin.

4. Chamomile Tea Compress 🍵

Brew a strong chamomile tea, let it cool, and apply it to your dog's tail with a clean cloth. The natural anti-inflammatory properties of chamomile can help reduce itching and irritation.

5. Distraction Techniques 🎾

Sometimes, the best remedy is prevention. Engage your dog in interactive play or provide puzzle toys to keep their mind occupied and reduce stress-related tail-biting.

6. Essential Oil Blend (With Caution!) 🌺

Mix a few drops of lavender essential oil with a carrier oil like coconut oil. Apply sparingly to your dog's collar, never directly on the skin. The calming scent may help reduce anxiety-related tail-biting. Always consult your vet before using essential oils on pets.

7. Dietary Supplements 🥩

Adding omega-3 fatty acids to your dog's diet can improve skin health and reduce inflammation. Consider fish oil supplements or adding small amounts of fish to their meals, after consulting with your veterinarian.

When to Seek Professional Help

While these home remedies can be effective, it's crucial to know when to consult a veterinarian. If the tail-biting persists, worsens, or is accompanied by other symptoms, it's time for a professional check-up. Your vet can rule out underlying medical conditions and provide targeted treatment if needed.

Tail-End Thoughts 🐕

Remember, every dog is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Be patient and consistent with your chosen remedies, and always prioritize your pet's comfort and well-being.

By incorporating these natural home remedies into your pet care routine, you can help your furry friend find relief from tail-biting behavior. With a little love, attention, and these gentle solutions, you'll have your pup wagging their tail happily in no time!

Don't forget to subscribe to Natural Home Remedies for more pet care tips and tricks. We're here to help you keep your four-legged family members healthy and happy, naturally! 🐾💚

Bonus Tip: DIY Calming Spray 🌸

Create a homemade calming spray by mixing 1 cup of water with 5 drops of lavender essential oil and 5 drops of chamomile essential oil in a spray bottle. Lightly mist your dog's bedding or the air around them (avoiding direct contact with their skin) to create a soothing environment that may help reduce stress-related tail-biting.

Remember, a happy tail means a happy dog! Keep those tails wagging and stay tuned for more natural remedies from Natural Home Remedies! 🐶💕

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[blogsonayurveda]

6 Simple ways to get rid of Covid Brain Fog

Understanding Brain Fog and 6 Simple ways to get rid of brain fog

You know how you get that sensation of disorientation, forgetfulness, and lack of attention every now and then? Although "brain fog" is not a medical word, it is a frequent feeling that many individuals experience. However, despite the fact that it is common, brain fog is far from normal. In truth, it is completely preventable and treated. Let’s understand the primary reasons for brain fog and what you can do to get rid of that fuzzy sensation for good.

What Exactly Is Brain Fog?

When you feel foggy, unfocused, disorganized, and unable to think clearly, your brain is delivering a vital signal that there is an imbalance in your life that needs to be addressed. It impairs your capacity to think and may make it difficult to express yourself verbally.

Brain Fog Causes

The causes of brain fog are often classified as either lifestyle-related or a side effect of a medical illness or medicine. The following are some of the most common causes of brain fog. Brain fog is a typical symptom of:

Hormonal alterations caused by persistent stress

Depression

Poor diet

Dehydration

Specific meds (such as those for anxiety and depression)

Other health problems or infections

In fact, according to a 2021 study, 7% of those on long-term COVID-19 had cognitive fog. According to MacKinnon, there is no one-size-fits-all treatment for brain fog because there are so many diverse components involved.

If your brain fog is interfering with your daily routine or making it difficult to do daily duties, you should consult a healthcare specialist. However, if all you're feeling is a little foggy, it could be worth it to experiment with a few lifestyle modifications. Here are a few ways to eliminate your brain fog once and for all along with a bonus ayurvedic medicine for immunity

Take a genuine break

Have you ever felt that you couldn't concentrate on a job no matter how hard you tried? According to research, the solution isn't to try harder. It might be advisable to take a break for a while.

According to 2016 research, taking a break from an activity may significantly increase your performance, attention, and level of self-control. However, not all mental breaks are made equal. According to one 2019 study, reaching for a cell phone does not help the brain to recharge as well as other forms of relaxation. Try the following to give your brain a more efficient break:

According to a 2018 study, only a few attentive minutes can improve focus.

Making a phone call to a friend or loved one. According to 2020 research, social interaction increases brain function.

Taking a power nap. According to a 2017 study, naps may improve memory retention and cognition, particularly in young adults.

Trying something creative. Painting, writing, colouring, dancing, cooking, or baking are some examples. According to 2018 research, creativity is a worthy adversary against stress.

Going outside. Nature has been shown in several studies to be a beneficial booster of mental health.

Eat (and drink) to feel better

While treats like sweets and chips might give an instant mental boost, eating a well-balanced diet can help you perform more consistently throughout the day. You are not required to make drastic adjustments straight immediately. Instead of eliminating "unhealthy" foods from your diet, begin by adding nutritious foods to your meals and snacks. Because scientists think that your body absorbs vitamins more efficiently from food sources than supplements, eating a well-balanced diet is the greatest method to boost your immune system.

Antioxidant-rich foods, such as blueberries, oranges, and almonds, can lower oxidative stress in the body, which can benefit the brain and body. Fish is another good source of nutrients for the brain. According to scientists, fish is strong in omega-3 fatty acids, which have been linked to decreased risks of cognitive deterioration. It's also critical to remain hydrated. Keep in mind that the brain is around 75% water! In fact, a 2021 study showed that dehydration might impair cognition and emotions. A decent rule of thumb is to drink enough water to ensure that your urine is clear or light yellow.

Sleep should be prioritized

We've all recognised the connection between sleep and exhaustion, but sleep deprivation has far-reaching consequences for the brain and body. Sleep deprivation impairs your capacity to make decisions, solve issues, and manage your emotions. Furthermore, sleep loss, according to experts, might raise your chance of chronic health problems such as high blood pressure, obesity, and heart disease. Make sleep a priority by implementing the following basic lifestyle changes:

If you can, go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, including on weekends.

Wind down at least 1 hour before bed by turning off your devices, which, according to a 2018 study, is related to a greater prevalence of insomnia and shorter sleep duration.

Avoid tobacco and coffee, both of which are stimulants that can disrupt sleep.

If required, use blackout shades to keep your space dark. To hide street or home noises, utilise a sleep sound machine.

Keep moving!

You may have heard someone compare your brain to a computer, but the fact is far more complex. Your brain and body are inextricably linked. So, if your mind is racing, it may be beneficial to begin moving. Researchers have linked a wide range of workouts to increased brain function. According to a 2016 study, exercise increases the production of proteins in the brain that improves brain function and lessens instances of anxiety and despair.

According to 2015 research, exercise may help with chronic pain and exhaustion. However, a 2021 study shows that it might also divert us from distressing thoughts, while a 2017 study highlights that it can assist in emotional control following a traumatic event. While the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) suggests 30 minutes of exercise every day, any movement counts.

Here are a few ideas for activities:

Walking. According to a 2018 study, even 10 minutes might improve mood.

Yoga. It has been shown in studies, such as one from 2019 in Iran, to alleviate stress, anxiety, and sadness.

Exercising at a high intensity. According to a 2021 study review, it has been found to increase cognitive performance.

Stretching. According to 2019 research, it may help with insomnia.

Gardening. A 2017 study found that gardening helps alleviate anxiety and sadness while also increasing life happiness. Furthermore, growing your own fresh veggies is both fulfilling and tasty.

Limit your intake of coffee and alcohol

We live in a world where coffee and alcohol are socially acceptable, especially in moderation. However, when it comes to these two chemicals, it's critical to analyze the gap between our perception of "moderation" and what science really says.

Caffeine, especially if you are caffeine sensitive, can induce jitters, headaches, sleeplessness, upset stomach, and a fast heart rate. As a result, the Food and Drug Administration advises no more than 400 mg of caffeine per day or 4 to 5 cups. Furthermore, in 2021 research, Chronic alcohol consumption has been linked to increased inflammation in the brain and body, according to a 2019 study that concluded that it may lead to greater cognitive deficits and neurological problems.

Supplements: Ayurvedic medicine for a strong immune system

To support, safeguard, and strengthen your immune system throughout the cold and flu season, natural vitamins can be quite helpful. Since Covid, people have been seeking all-natural solutions to increase immunity and to start antiviral medication as soon as possible to avoid unwanted outcomes. CelWel acts as an ayurvedic immunity booster drop and supports its recovery as well as treats the signs of fatigue, Long Covid, and other conditions. It is being used as brain fog ayurvedic medicine as it uses the strength of molecular signalling and the therapeutic properties of Guduchi to help patients recover more quickly from conditions including chronic weariness, exhaustion, breathing issues, fever, and a number of other related illnesses.

[yanderemommabean]

This is more of a really long ramble than a request but I kinda want to share this (if just to get it off my mind) (also, I’ve never submitted an ask before so I don’t know if I’m doing it right.)

I have this yandere therapist character that I thought up as like a comfort. He acts perfect but doesn’t really care about his patients, sits through the session, does his job, ends exactly as the sessions hour is up and is overall bored with the work. (For some background this man did psychology and became a doctor purely because it made him come across as more trustworthy and so he could manipulate people better.)

He is a lot like lee but is much more psychological in his torture. Picks out a victim, anyone who he sees as deplorable, makes them trust him and then uses them to “expand his grasp on the human mind” through various tests.

He seems very understanding/ kind and is overall a great therapist but rarely actually feels empathy or sympathy to his patients (or anyone for that matter) and definitely feels superior to most of his coworkers. Virtually nothing is hard or challenging to him and he isn’t interested in anything but his experiments.

(Through some way or another) he gets a new patient. (I honestly base why they are there after me so heavy anxiety, depression adhd autism ect. but it can be whatever people relate most to)

After about a month and a half (4-6 sessions) he starts to get so intrigued by this patient that they are all he can think about-consuming every conscious and subconscious thought. he realises that during those sessions with them he never once got bored and actually felt like he cared for them.

Of course this patient ends up being his darling and he’s a yandere so his love is very intense. He goes above and beyond for this patient. And his excuse to keep it professional is basically “I care about all of my patients, please don’t worry about being a bother, these sessions are our your time.”

Darling is tired? - “Well I have some blankets somewhere here, if you wish you can sleep on the couch in here. I’d be happy to hold you if you wish my love , touch therapy is a very useful tool!”

The session runs over? - “ah, I suppose I should’ve make better note of the time. Hm? Oh please don’t apologise, my poor time management is not your fault whatsoever. Besides, it seemed like you needed a longer session today anyway” (This man has never struggled with poor time management, he knew the second the hour was up)

He’s basically thinks everyone else but them doesn’t matter at all. And whilst he acts kind to everyone his darling is practically the only one he’s not immediately annoyed by. Like he can go from thinking about how to mentally break one of his experiments in the worst way to “They looked so nice today in that outfit, I bet their skin is so soft. I can’t wait till they only depend on me.” Just completely subdued by this patient.

And of course he has the normal yandere traits, stalking them, going through private medical files, ect. But he has the added bonus of being someone trustworthy,as he is literally his darlings therapist.

Any chance he can get to be around them he takes. Ups their sessions from every two weeks to each week, saying that he thought they needed more support. He’s even a little more kind to his experiments after a session with them sometimes. That is unless they reveal or talk about something traumatic, at which point he’s much worse to the experiments- with the new motivation of ridding the world from degenerates to keep them safe.

And I love your writing so I can’t stop thinking about a student darling with this who takes some form of science and Dexter’s class and so constantly interacts with the therapist (I don’t really have a name yet,) Dexter and also has dr.lee on their medical team.

(I’ll probably put a part 2 in the ask box exploring that) You don’t have to respond to this I just wanted to write about it.

(PS I hope things start going better for you aswell and remember to take time for just yourself, when you can)

I really love this, the way you made the character, how he feels about himself versus others until he meets his darling (with a good time window for the feelings to deepen and begin!)

I love this, and would love if you felt comfortable to send more! I think it’s tasteful and very well thought out, better than mine for sure!

Feel free to send more bean!

-Mommabean

[daydrinkinginvestigator]

Hey, private investigator right here. Professional snoop.... professionally.

tw: alcoholism, mental health things (depression, ptsd), parental/family death, car accidents, manipulation, abuse mentions.

CHARACTER NAME/ALIAS: Jessica Jones. She was Jewel once upon a time,  but now it’s just Jessica FACECLAIM: Emmy Rossum AFFILIATIONS: None, at the moment. Previously the Defenders AGE (physical age as well, if different): 35 SPECIES (human, metahuman, alien, etc): Meta human IS YOUR CHARACTER’S IDENTITY SECRET OR PUBLIC?: Public IF SECRET, OR YOUR CHARACTER IS A CIVILIAN, DO THEY HAVE A CIVILIAN OCCUPATION? She’s a private investigator, working from a one-woman investigation firm: Alias Investigations DOES YOUR CHARACTER LIVE IN THE MOUSEHOLE? IF SO, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? That’s a nope DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM:

+ INDEPENDENT: Jessica Jones takes care of Jessica Jones, come hell or high water. She’s highly resourceful and quick on her feet, all of which have been useful in terms of her survival. Her entire drive is how to keep the lights on and how to get her next drink, and she’ll really do whatever it takes to make that happen. She doesn’t look for hand-outs, believes in earning her keep and makes damn sure she can take care of herself.

+ OBSERVANT & EFFECTIVE: Jessica might not necessarily be the best investigator out there, but she likes to think she’s effective and a damn good one. She’s ever-aware of her surroundings, even when off the clock (probably part of being a New Yorker, it’s hard wired in her brain at this point).  She’s always got eyes on, is always aware of how many exits and windows and whatever the fuck else are in a given space. She doesn’t like going into situations blind, and is damn good at the leg work to make sure that she doesn’t. She’s highly intelligent, though her smarts are more street smarts than book smarts.

+ HARD EXTERIOR SOFT AND SQUISHY INTERIOR: Jessica wishes she didn’t care. Really, her life would be so much fucking easier if she didn’t care. She could just move on along, ignore the world in crisis, smoke a cigarette and just enjoy the day...but that unfortunately isn’t the case. Jessica has a big ol’ heart and a conscience she wishes she didn’t have. She cares a lot, and it shows more often than she’d like. She’s full of compassion, even if it’s buried deep under all the sarcasm and hidden behind a scrappy exterior.

- BLUNT: Jessica does not mince words for anything: not for the sake of someone’s feelings, not to be politically correct, not for posterity, not for jack shit. She has no filter and is quite literally INCAPABLE of keeping her mouth shut. Jessica says what she wants when she wants to, socially acceptable or not be damned.

- SHORT FUSED & ERRATIC: Jessica is unpredictable in just about every sense of the word. Her behavior, her lifestyle, her day-to-day interactions and patterns...Jessica follows no rhyme or reason. Most of it is mood-dependent, but that’s horribly unpredictable as well. She’s also temperamental with a fuse shorter than a matchstick: she’s 0 to 100. Sometimes it goes right back to zero, sometimes it doesn’t. Gotta keep up with the unpredictable, it’s part of her brand.

- BURNT OUT: Jessica is tired. She’s burnt out on the hero thing, and has become horribly jaded on all of that. She drinks as a means to cope with all of the shit she’s dealing with, drinks so that she can sleep and then sleeps until her phone rings to wake her up with the next job. She’s exhausted, though trucking on best she can, whatever that means. POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Superhuman strength (she’s shown the ability to lift 4-5 tons), limited flight capabilities, accelerated healing and durability. WEAKNESSES: She isn’t indestructible by any means. Jessica is still vulnerable to bullets and to other assorted injuries; she might heal fast, but she’s still on the human side of meta human. Jessica also suffers from PTSD, though it is officially undiagnosed and she self-medicates.. She’s an alcoholic and has depressive tendencies and has an overall horrible self-image. IC PORTION; DETAILS — WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA? Karen Page. Karen contacted Jessica, and Jessica found herself cursing her conscience as she packed a suitcase and booked a ticket for...Sokovia? But maybe she could make a vacation around it. See the sights. Drink the booze. Learn the swear words. New York has been *fucked* lately anyway, she could use some fresh air and a break from the shitshow. DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT? Fuck the accords PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER:

Jessica Jones does not drive. She is an expert on public transport, knows the maps of buses and trains and subways in Manhattan like the back of her hand, and also really likes to just walk. She avoids cars in general if she can, and never even tried to get her license.

Despite not being anything remotely close to religious, Jessica almost always wears a cross. It belonged to her mother, and Jessica hasn’t taken it off in years. It’s a nervous habit to fiddle with it, and it’s Jessica’s ultimate comfort item.

She has a few compulsions relating to her anxiety and PTSD that follow her no matter where she goes. She does many things in threes: checking doors, turning on lights, setting alarms, so on and so forth. She taps her foot and drums her fingers, she’s always in constant motion.

Jessica always has a flask on her. Always. It generally gets refilled halfway through the day, but that’s irrelevant. The particular flask she always carries belonged to her father (technically, it had belonged to her grandfather first, but the sentimental aspect for Jessica is absolutely with her father). She always keeps it close, sometimes even sleeps with it, and tries to ignore the fact that he would be sorely disappointed with just how much use the damn thing got.

CHARACTER BIO — Buckle up, kids; we’re in for one wild fuckin’ ride.

(No, really. Buckle up. The downward spiral of Jessica’s life absolutely started with a car accident, so wear your fucking seatbelts.)

Jessica Jones was once Jessica Campbell. Her childhood was nothing to talk about, nothing extraordinary. She was more of the quiet type (believe it or not), kept to herself. She wasn’t athletic, wasn’t artistic, wasn’t particularly gifted when it came to her grades: she just kind of rolled with the current, and was nothing (well, no one) particularly interesting. She had a younger brother that pissed her off and once put a frog in her bed, loved her parents, went to church on Sunday to appease her mom (her dad always snuck her M&M’s when she behaved). A normal life, if a boring one. That changed, though, when Jessica was fifteen years old.

It was on a family road trip when her father accidentally steered their family car into traffic, colliding with a military humvee. Her father, mother and brother were killed on impact. But Jessica...Jessica had a canister of experimental, super-fucking-high-level-shit land in her lap that had crashed through the minivan’s windshield.

And to think, she’d been bitching about how Disney World was lame and for little kids. Disney World sounded like a goddamn dream compared to this.

It didn’t look good, not for a while. The accident (and the exposure to whatever the hell was in that canister) left Jessica in a coma for several months. Waking up was a big ol’ shock for the doctors that had been taking care of her, but Jessica was a fighter and apparently damn good at beating the odds. Jessica was released from the hospital once she had fully recovered from her injuries, though she no longer had a home to go to. Jessica was released to the Moore House for Wayward Children. Jessica spent much of her time there withdrawn and angry, struggling with trying to figure out how to cope with her parents death. Before long, she was adopted by the Jones family, from her old neighborhood. Mrs. Jones had lost her own family at a young age, and felt for Jessica.

Jessica felt like a freak, back at her old high school, and was referred to as “Coma Girl” by her peers. She was angry, explosively so, and being plopped right back into some semblance of her old life was insulting and laughable. It was at this time that Jessica began to discover her powers - accidentally taking off in flight when trying to run away from school. Soon, Jessica accidentally defeated Scorpion and discovered she had super strength. The gears began turning in her head as Jessica struggled to look for a silver lining, something positive to come out of this tragedy. Super powers seemed to make the list.

Jessica took on the alias ‘Jewel’ and began to work under the radar in New York, going after dirtbags and muggers and whatever other criminals she could get her hands on. She dyed her hair bright pink, threw together a flashy costume, though did not bother to hide her face and therefore her identity. She learned the extent of her powers (and her advanced healing, which was an added bonus since she was going to be doing the hero shtick) and experimented with what she was capable of.

It was during her time as Jewel that Jessica stumbled upon the Purple Man. Zebediah Killgrave would hold Jessica hostage using his pheromone powers for eight months. During this time, Jessica was fully under his thumb and controlled by him; she was also subjected to physical and mental abuse, largely as a way for Killgrave to take out his fury over his losses (particularly to Daredevil). When Killgrave had had enough of Daredevil, he sent Jessica on mission to kill him. Jessica was still under his mind control, though the further she got from him, the weaker the hold was. She broke his hold on her before she reached him, and fled.

Jessica was briefly taken in by S.H.I.E.L.D., where Nick Fury wanted Jessica to work as a liaison for the Avengers. Jessica did not even consider the offer. After her time with Killgrave, she wanted nothing to do with the hero life and felt that she herself was not a hero after the things she’d done while under Killgrave’s control. She was entirely disinterested in being involved with anything related to being a super hero. She decided that Jewel would be no more.

Jessica returned to New York and became a licensed private investigator. She opened her own firm, Alias Investigations, which she ran out of her apartment. It was a one-woman investigation team, Jessica being the only employee, but the LLC and business model helped when it came to liability, y’know? Her street smarts and keen observation skills came in handy with her now-chosen career path, and Jessica found that she enjoyed it. Her methods might be..unconventional and she might get herself into some sticky situations, but she always got the job done.

Overall, the job mostly involved tailing cheating spouses, trust fund kids, things of the like: jobs that paid well but didn’t necessarily take a whole lot of brain power. The drinking began shortly after her arrival back to New York, and soon turned to excess. Jessica struggled with dreams and flashes of her parents, of the Purple Man, and was desperate not to feel any of it. The booze helped, made her feel something closer to numb, but it steadily took more and more to get the job done. That didn’t stop her, to be clear: no, she just bought cheaper booze in higher volumes to get the job done.

Her work as a private investigator slowly dragged her back into the hero world, sometimes kicking and screaming. After all, she’d never hid her face so it was pretty fuckin’ easy to figure out that Jessica Jones used to be Jewel and had been a part of this world for a time. She didn’t turn away the cases that had to do with the hero sort, even if she initially wanted to: the money was still green, still paid the bills, and Jessica had this weird sense of obligation to take them that she couldn’t quite explain (and that made her nauseous, but that’s not really relevant). Similarly, this was how Jessica found herself patrolling New York with the other Defenders: that nagging conscience just couldn’t be quiet, even when she begged it to be, even when she tried to drown it (literally, with vodka) and squash it down.

The Accords made things more complicated, and Jessica wasn’t a big fan of complicated. She swore off the hero shit this time for good; she would stay uninvolved, keep her nose out of it, because she didn’t need the ISA on her ass. Jessica continued to work through Alias, continued to do her investigation thing, and business was booming as always. Naturally that for good wasn’t actually for good and she found herself dragged back in from time to time, but you know, she’d only made that promise to herself so no one else really knew about it anyway.

EXTRAS — Sin: Gluttony, Sloth, Pride Hogwarts House: Zodiac: Taurus Myers Briggs: ISTP

[puttingherinhistory]

December 27, 2015 by Suzannah Weiss

I was young when I came to discover masturbation, and I had orgasms long before I knew what they were.

Nothing about it seemed complicated. I just rubbed “down there” for a few minutes, and it happened. But later, magazines, comedy routines, and sitcoms taught me that my body – and vaginas in general – were mysterious and complex, often too complex for those without them to figure out.

Confirming what I’d been taught, orgasms weren’t as simple with partners as they were by myself. This is to be expected to some extent. There’s a learning curve when you’re getting to know someone new. But what confused me was that not everyone seemed eager to learn.

“Sorry,” I (unnecessarily) apologized to a partner for taking what I thought was too long.

“It’s okay. I know it’s harder for girls,” he said – and then stopped.

Compounding the lack of effort I encountered from some (though not all) partners, it became harder for me to orgasm when I started SSRI antidepressants. When I told my doctor, she said, “Oh, that’s hard for a lot of women anyway.”

I knew my body long and well enough to know being a woman wasn’t to blame, but others didn’t share my view that the problem was fixable. I grew hesitant to bring it up with partners out of fear that asking them to perform the supposedly impossible feat of getting a woman off was too demanding.

Orgasm doesn’t have to be the focus of sex, but if a woman wants one, she should have as much of a right to request it as anyone else does.

When people say that women’s bodies are more difficult – and these generalizations typically refer to cis women and are accompanied by rants about how complicated vaginas are – they teach cis women that an orgasm is too tall an order.

Trans women also have a slew of sexual stigmas attached to them, which Kai Cheng Thom describes here, though they’re beyond the scope of this article. In addition, though most research on orgasm inequity has studied cis women, trans and non-binary people with vaginas may relate to the frustrations of being taught their genitals are impossible to decode, too.

The view that cis women are hard to please maintains what sociologists call the orgasm gap, in which men have three orgasms for every one a woman enjoys, and 57% of women orgasm during all or most of their sexual encounters, but 95% say their partners do.

These statistics may appear to confirm the stereotype that women’s bodies are more complicated, but there are other forces at work.

As sociologist Lisa Wade points out, the orgasm gap is conditional. Lesbians report orgasming 74.7% of the time, only 10 percentage points lower than gay men. In addition, women take under four minutes on average to masturbate to orgasm.

If these statistics don’t convince you that there’s more to the orgasm gap than biology, here are twelve cultural factors that contribute to it.

1. People Believe Women Are Less Sexual

Women, the story goes, aren’t that into sex.

They may enjoy it, but they do it partially in exchange for validation, commitment, or financial support, popular wisdom says. As long as a woman is getting one of those things, she doesn’t need much out of the sex itself.

To the contrary, a lot of research and lived experiences indicate that women are as capable of wanting and enjoying sex as men.

Until we acknowledge this, we won’t prioritize making sex as enjoyable as possible for women because we’ll believe sexual pleasure isn’t as important to them.

It may not be because women themselves may buy into myths about their gender, neglecting their desires because they’re not supposed to have them. If they do, they and their partners miss out on balanced sexual interactions, not to mention fun.

2. Pornography Privileges Male Pleasure

Most people who have watched porn videos know they typically culminate with a “money shot” in which the man comes, and then the scene ends. Most woman-focused orgasms depicted in porn are merely incidental events on the path to a man’s pleasure.

Additionally, most mainstream porn scenes feel incomplete without blow jobs, while cunnilingus is less common.

All in all, the message is clear: It’s imperative that a man gets off, and if a woman manages to in the process, props to him, but it’s just an added bonus.

3. The Myth of ‘Blue Balls’ Persists

Blue balls, according to Urban Dictionary, is “the excrutiating [sic] pain a man receives when his balls swell to the size of coconuts because of lack of sex, unfinished bjs, and just not cummin when he knows he should.”

The entitlement reflected in this description is characteristic of most uses of the term “blue balls.” While vasocongestion, the accumulation of blood flow to the genitals, can occasionally cause mild pain in people with any genitals, this is not what men are usually referring to when they complain about blue balls. And whether they’re experiencing this or just sexual frustration, it’s never anyone else’s duty to relieve it.

Even though most women know no medical condition results from an erection that doesn’t lead to an orgasm, many of us feel guilty for not providing one. So, in addition to some men’s lack of effort to pleasure women, the pressure many women feel to pleasure men maintains the orgasm gap.

4. There’s More Information in the Media About Pleasing Cis Men Than Women

As a teenager, my secret guilty pleasure was buying copies of Cosmo from the drugstore and hiding them under my pillow to read at night.

I read all their sex articles just because I found anything sex-related titillating, but along the way, I learned all about different tricks to please men – and cis men, specifically. By the time I encountered a real-life penis, I already knew all the basic tricks in the book, plus some out-there ones my dude friends urged me not to try.

I don’t know what most teenage boys’ secret reading material was, but there aren’t many mainstream men’s magazines as obsessed with pleasing women as women’s are with pleasing men. If anything, I’ve heard it’s common for boys to sneak glimpses of Playboy, which is also geared toward pleasing men.

Maybe this explains why 25% of men and 30% of women can’t locate the clitoris on a diagram.

Amid all the advice we read about different ways to hold and touch a penis, many remain in the dark about vulvas and vaginas.

5. Hookup Culture Privileges Male Pleasure

“I will do everything in my power to, like whoever I’m with, to get [him] off,” one woman said in a study by Elizabeth Armstrong on college hookups. But when it came to their own pleasure, women held different expectations.

“The guy kind of expects to get off, while the girl doesn’t expect anything,” a woman in another study by Lisa Wade said.

Accordingly, one man in Armstrong’s study boasted, “I’m all about making her orgasm,” but when asked to clarify the word “her,” he added, “Girlfriend her. In a hookup her, I don’t give a shit.” Perhaps he sensed that women don’t expect much from their hookups.

Statistics about women’s orgasms reflect these attitudes.

The ratio of men’s and women’s orgasms is 3.1:1 for first-time hookups, but only 1.25:1 for relationships.

For whatever reason, hookup culture appears to have embraced the message espoused by the media that women’s orgasms are optional, while men’s are obligatory.

6. Sex Education Doesn’t Teach Us About Pleasure, Especially Female Pleasure

Like many schools in the US, mine only had a couple of days a year dedicated to sex education in middle and high school. During the initial classes on puberty, the portion about women was on periods and the portion about men was on erections, ejaculation, and wet dreams.

Already, our bodies were associated with making babies, while boys’ were associated with sexual arousal and pleasure.

Later on, we learned how to use a condom – along with how to complete a very normative sequence of events. You put it on, we were told, and then you have intercourse, and then someone ejaculates, and then you pull out and take it off. Men’s orgasms, but not women’s, were built into our safer sex lesson.

Nobody said “then you stop whenever you feel like it” or “your partner may need you to pull out” (because, contrary to what we see in porn, not every woman is multi-orgasmic and many have a refractory period, so we can’t all comfortably keep going until our partner wants to stop).

This is one sneaky way we learn to prioritize men’s pleasure without ever really learning about pleasure at all.

7. Self-Evaluative Thoughts Can Disrupt Women’s Arousal Process

Due to the emphasis on women’s appearances in mainstream porn and throughout the media, women learn to picture themselves during sex.

“How does my stomach look from this angle,” “Does my face look sexy or silly in this expression,” and “Would it be sexier if I made more noise?” are a few thoughts that have distracted me in the bedroom.

And I don’t think I’m alone: 32% of women say that when they don’t orgasm, it’s often because they’re stuck in their heads or focused on their looks.

Orgasm itself can become a source of performance anxiety.

Because the women’s orgasms are dramatized in porn and the media, with exaggerated moans and calculated facial expressions, some women feel so much pressure that fear of not coming keeps them from coming. This pressure can also lead women to fake orgasms instead of sticking it out for a real one.

Once again, women’s magazines don’t help.

Cosmo even provides a guide on “how to look even hotter naked.” Though “even” implies the reader looks hot already, the pre-bedroom workout routine and self-tanner application tips make it clear we don’t look as hot as we could – and even if we do, the focus is still on our partner’s pleasure, not what we see or feel.

Thoughts about partners’ perceptions place women outside their bodies, looking in, rather than inside them, feeling the sensations the sexual activity is causing. It’s hard to have an orgasm when you’re not even thinking sexual thoughts.

8. Sexual Trauma Can Impede Arousal and Orgasm

It’s extremely common for women to experience sexual trauma within their lifetimes. One out of six women has been the victim of attempted or completed rape.

According to sex therapist Vanessa Marin, this trauma can have lasting effects on one’s sex life.

“Sexual assault can rob your enjoyment of sex and can make any type of intimacy feel scary,” she said. “Some survivors experience feelings of disconnect or dissociation when they’re having sex. Others can easily get triggered by being touched in certain places or in specific ways.”

Marin recommends that survivors seek out therapy or a support group so they don’t have to deal with the effects of their pasts alone.

In the short-term, Marin has written that reminding yourself you’re with your partner, not the person who assaulted you, can quell trauma-related sexual problems. “Of course your brain knows that it’s [them], but this exercise can help the more subconscious parts of your psyche start to relax,” she writes.

Other emotions women disproportionately experience around sex, such as guilt and shame, may also lead to anorgasmia.

9. More Women Than Men Are on Antidepressants

SSRI antidepressants, like Prozac and Zoloft, can cause anorgasmia. This side effect isn’t gender-specific, but antidepressants themselves are.

Between 2001 and 2010, 25% of American women (but only 15% of men) had been prescribed medication for mental health conditions.

This may occur because women are more likely to suffer from anxiety and depression, both frequently treated with SSRIs, the medication class most commonly known to cause anorgasmia. There are many theories as to why, but one possible source of this difference is societal misogyny.

As Ally Boghun writes of her anxiety, “A lot of the stressors that impact me the most are actually stressors put upon women by society to look and act in certain ways.” In addition, women are more likely to seek therapy, since toxic standards of masculinity deter men from discussing their emotions.

This is one case where the orgasm gap may be related to biological differences, but the sources of these differences are still societal.

10. Women Are Discouraged from Asking for What They Want

Women are taught to accommodate others’ wishes and put their own on the back burner, to be pleasant and polite and grateful and not ask for more, whether that’s food, payment, or sexual pleasure.

To bring back Armstrong’s research, one woman said she didn’t have the “right” to request an orgasm and “felt kind of guilty almost, like I felt like I was kind of subjecting [guys] to something they didn’t want to do and I felt bad about it.”

I can relate: I’ve said “sorry” many times for requesting or giving myself the stimulation I wanted, for taking what I thought was too much time, and for receiving pleasure without immediately returning it.

The same fear that keeps women from voicing their opinions in work meetings or negotiating salaries also keeps us from speaking up in bed.

But until we can “lean in” without bumping into hostility, women can’t singlehandedly solve this problem in any domain. It’s also up to our partners, coworkers, and others to make it clear they want to hear and accommodate our wishes.

11. The Normative Definition of Sex Isn’t Optimal for Many Women’s Orgasms

When someone says “sex,” most people think of penis-in-vagina intercourse, even though it means many different things to different people.

For example, some couples may see oral sex as sex. Some may also put oral or manual sex on the same level as penetrative sex, but this is still not the norm.

When someone talks about losing their virginity, for instance, we usually assume they’re talking about the first time they had penis-in-vagina intercourse.

This assumption can be problematic for women who get off more easily through other activities.

In one survey, 20% of women said they seldom or never had orgasms during intercourse. Only 25% said they consistently do. In another, 38% said that when they don’t orgasm, a common obstacle is “not enough clitoral stimulation.”

Since penetrative sex often doesn’t directly stimulate the clitoris, this could explain why other types of sex – or clitoral stimulation during intercourse, which women considered the most common way they got off with a partner – may be more optimal.

When we consider the activities that often help women reach orgasm as warmup or extra, we deprioritize women’s pleasure.

12. People Think the Orgasm Gap Is Biological

Orgasm inequity is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

When men believe women’s bodies are an impossible puzzle, they don’t try to solve it. Neither do women who are taught their own pleasure is inaccessible.

That’s why it’s important we acknowledge all the societal factors that contribute to this discrepancy. Genetics can’t be fixed, but a lot of these problems can, which means that closing the orgasm gap is possible.

***

If you’re a woman having trouble orgasming, it’s likely not you. It may not be the result of any carelessness on your partner’s part either. You may just need to talk about it, challenge the myths you’ve learned about sexuality, and, if necessary, seek help for any psychological or medical conditions that could be contributing to the problem.

Or maybe it’s not a problem at all. Maybe orgasming isn’t important to you, and that’s your choice as well. But if it is something you would like, you have the same right to ask for it as your partner. If he expects orgasms from you, he shouldn’t mind you wanting one.

It’s not too much to ask, and your anatomy isn’t too complicated. The only thing that’s complicated is the toxic set of messages we’re taught about sexuality. But that’s not on you or your body.

[neverheardnothing]

rewatching joe iconis and family lincoln center performance at 4 am instead of packing or sleeping just to feel something and i have so FEW and so MANY thoughts and yall are gonna hear em all. no i will not put this under a cut. im going to be an absolute bastard about this.

i love the story joe tells about why he's singing mitb as the first song so much. like. the spite of it all. the defiance of it all. the pride of it all. the dig it or fuck off and disappear of it all. the joe iconis of it all. 

“i know exactly the song im going to sing as my first song at the american songbook series.” i love that he highlights the fact that this is the american songbook series.

then immediately jumping right into broadway here i come with molly hager, the other song he is most known for!!!

every time i think about this performance i think about how this was the first (?) time this song was performed by them since the closing of bmc.

and then lance rubin comes up to sing try again. which is the only time that i know of that anyone but joe has sung this song.

i remember a remark made during watching it live that having someone else sing the song made it seem so clearly more about joe and his career. but also having lance sing it immediately makes me think of bbh closing early which yeah is part of joe’s career but also lance’s.

and also the line “if you’re an actor and another actor gets the part you auditioned for” reminds me of how lance found the auditioning process of acting and the whole [not acting part] of an acting career to be terrible which is why he quit to then become an author and the juxtaposition of him singing try again is Something. but also he DID try again he is just applying his efforts to a different creative field and it’s working out great for him. good for lance rubin.

lol i haven’t even talked about the actual performance aspect of this song anyways it’s very different from the two versions ive seen of joe doing it. he plays it a lot more comical. i love it.

sidenote not specific about this performance, but i love love LOVE the line and the music at “use the stairs, walk to the street. see the people, feel the heat, and apply yourself again.”

and also the line “when they cast you out to sea, there’s a lifeboat manned by me called try and try again” will never not make me think of bsol/last on land and bonus lance was also in that show! it just keeps circling around.

everything about these past 3 songs performed at this venue in this set list order in this moment at joe’s career is honestly so wonderful. like you had a songs about an anxiety attack, a suicide/loss of self in success, and repeated failures before this song all sung by individuals. two of these songs were written at points where joe felt frustrated/sad with his career. one written in the aftermath of specific frustration about the first closing of be more chill. one an actual song from bmc. like what a SETLIST for your first three songs! fucking michael in the bathroom, broadway here i come, and try again. truly something.

THE WHISKEY SONG!! i love hearing joe sing so much. while i think we can all agree he’s not the most skilled singer there’s something special about hearing a composer perform their own work. he adds like 3 levels of charm to make up for lack of singing skills lol. just a very charismatic guy.

lance rubin back on tamborine for the next bit of the song and he’s like laughing through it. not completely sure what he’s laughing about honestly but this Is a comedic song (after 3 real downers of songs) and also joe was playing it up.

jared weiss down on the floor with his guitar playing along. that’s its own bullet point.

audience cheering as more family members start coming on stage! i love that the band is getting cheers. love that!!!

the camera isn’t on him but from the audio, nick blaemire is presumably running around giving high fives to people in the audience.

i can’t exactly tell with the camera angle and the lighting but i think that more family members get up from different seats in the audience or at least enter in the back and walk through the audience to get to the stage during this instrumental break. reminds me of how joe loves theater that physically touches you. giving you high fives in this case.

love liz lark brown. she plays it pretty like. frenetic and frazzled. love it.

amara, badia, danielle, will, and nick are just chillin sitting on the steps of the stage. 100% contributes to the vibe of this song. top fuckin notch.

SOMEONE screams AH during the drunk part of the song and i cannot figure out who but it gives me so much life.

jared pulling lance down to the floor with him.

jason going “man.... this place is a dump” like i LOVE the irreverence.

everyone actually getting back up and also converging On the stage during the (kind of) acapella break.

and now your whole gang is up on the stage at the fancy ass appel room singing your what sounds like a mostly upbeat fun song but is actually about self medication with alcohol and it’s a fucking jam. i love the 3 solo songs and then bringing in everyone for a big group number.

sidenote not about this specific performance: the lyrics “i’ll pour some more and then—AND THEN?—i’ll pass out and then—AND THEN!” the and thens were not on the things to ruin album and i wonder why not ALL the time. was it just deemed extraneous? or was this an innovation after the album was recorded?

i love that you can see the band singing along.

yesterdays / i can’t relate. i love this song i fucking love it. i love the synthy keyboard that was an active choice made. which means that joe is not the one accompanying jared in this song.

jared: i hate today. joe: *snorts in the background*

“i like music you can hold” -> old records black suits, susannah’s obsession with music which was of course in vinyl format back then

will once said hearing lgw was very exciting because he’s first and foremost a fan of joe’s so he was hearing a new joe song for the first time and the world got just a bit larger and i think about that quote a lot in relation to this song because i was like Oh i Get What He Means now because this is the first new joe song i heard since like getting into his work and i felt that world getting a bit bigger.

jared’s monotone chorus on top of the girls underneath is so good. it’s so fucking good i cannot.

liz lark brown velociraptor fuckin classic. specifically in this performance the weird ass electric guitar noise at “there’s a dinosaur” is SO good. i love it.

i know people say Trans Vibes from next song (jeff) but this song also gives me trans vibes. i think joe inadvertently writes stuff trans people relate to because of his propensity to write for People Who Are Different.

people cheering as will takes off his jacket hell yeah.

i am way more used to the jeremy morse version of this song and really consider it more his so it’s so fun to hear will sing it.

i love the canon of the “oh”s so much.

after will sings “i go to the window looking out and what do i see? myself just staring back at me.” and someone in the audience AUDIBLY goes “oh.” like what a MOMENT. way more subtle than when someone screamed “WHAT” at the “naked korean girl” reveal during the pipe night performance but on the same tier of Great Audience Reactions.

smooth fuckin gliss bro i love it. arms out by side. i love it.

Classic Jason Sweettooth Williams Singing Helen. but this time they added like some REAL like. oh god i have no idea how to describe it. electric crunchy electric guitar noises. and it’s so good.

i havent mentioned this yet but in the background of every song people who are not in it or are backup vocals are just sitting and jamming along and it’s so nice because me fuckin too.

honest to god just have to give a timestamp for this but bullet point for whatever the fuck eric is doing in the background here.

will and katrina circling each other singing directly into each other’s faces. so good.

the Unexpected dynamic change and following crescendo i am Living.

katrina rose dideriksen riffing up top. yes. YES.

joe starting to play helen sharp and then forgetting part of his introduction to the song is so good.

the inevitable laughter at any performance of this song at “it is not lost on me you’re all here at my show”

i know nothing about the movie death becomes her so i honestly always just think about joe when this song gets performed. also thinking about how in the youtube premiere of this song, joe was talking about how lauren was shouting out the names of all the musical theater composers joe is jealous of.

right place/wrong time. i read a bsol review a while ago about how katrina rose dideriksen was underutilized and gotta say i Agree holy Shit let her sing More.

i also remember how joe once said this song felt the most personal to him and that he cried when writing it

police siren piano.

the first time in this entire song they sing in sync is at the line “i wonder if his/her life is just like mine” and i just start screaming.

when eric and katrina turn to each other for the first time and start singing At each other!!!!!!!!!!!

honey! thinking about jen ash tep talking about how Each performance of this song gets Wilder and Wilder.

love it when nick just gets off the stage and starts singing to people in the audience. apparently one of the people was will’s mom lol.

ACAPELLA BREAK!!!!!! joe just fully gets up from piano and starts WILDLY clapping along!!!!

woman of a certain age! i remember when the live show happened the album had not come out yet and then when the yt premiere of it happened it Had been out for a week or so.

piano note elevator bell

the electric guitar is doing some fucking weird ass things in this song and i am living so fucking much for it.

the riffs badia does are so fucking incredible i immediately paused this video to go and watch her sing big fat ruby again just because i wanted more badia content.

the story behind old flame is so good and joe waiting until the last fuckin moment to give her the song is so fuckin funny.

i love love love these types of joe songs that are like 7 minute long story epics like right place/wrong time and the actress and ammonia and old flame.

“the best way to get past the past is to shoot it in the head” and then the audience cheers and i fucking love it. my commentary is getting shorter. it’s 6 am and i’m tired can you tell. i also just had a lot of thoughts about this early on and less thoughts about later on.

revolution song. the deep ass fucking electric bass is So good i Will go apeshit. like honestly that might be my favorite smaller detail of this song. like i imagine if i were in the room it might be loud and deep enough that i could feel it In my chest. like you can Feel the revolution coming.

i love the faster tempo revolution song has in the cabaret version.

i also love the cabaret specific lines of “evolution in the institution”

joey is a punk rocker was honestly not ever on the list of songs i thought would get performed here but im so glad that they did. like the obvious choice would have been veins for annie golden but they went this route. obsessed with this choice. obsessed with the fact that amphibian replaced this song as the act 2 opener. obsessed that annie is the one singing this.

i am never not screaming about wave and yall know this. just throwback to me losing it in the tags in a reblog of picture of the wave passage going on about how it really does mirror joe’s career and bmc specifically. and again this song being performed for the first (?) time since bmc closed makes the “so today on a hill in las vegas” and onward part SO fucking sad i literally just started crying. the entire song being in past tense up until that part. i will just go die now.

will in the yt premiere talking about texting the line “our energy would simply prevail” in the leadup to bmc coming back.

find the bastard. for some reason when this happened live i thought it was gonna be outlaw that was performed. 

i swear to god it is literally physically impossible for me not to AT LEAST mouth along to “what’s your name, what’s your name” during this song

NAMES ARE FOR ACCOUNTANTS.

MY NAME IS AWFUL LONG AS IT’S THE LYRICS OF THIS SONG.

the goodbye song. it’s never not sad. i love love love that this song is the final song every concert. i also love the recent lore of finding out that penny dreadfuls was the encore song at concerts before they became too long and it had to get cut.

finally gonna mention the background car lights. what a beautiful backdrop.

also since im always on my wrol bullshit i love how fucking clearly you can hear him at the end

accelerando accelerando accelerando. insert [joe iconis peaked when he wrote the accelerando in the goodbye song post of mine].

katrina singing an octave up is always SO fucking impressive i am so impressed by her voice she is so fucking good i love her so much

the bows are so fucking sweet i love them.

goodnight it’s 7 am.

[singingvio]

So on the headcanon list I just posted I talked about Vio possibly having ADHD and being distracted easily, and because I’m ADHD myself and relate to Vio’s character a lot, I want to talk about that more.

First, a lecture on what exactly ADHD is and how it works because some people just interpret it as ‘LOL I have an attention span of a millisecond who wants ice cream’ and that’s actually incorrect and it kind of pisses me off, then, after that, more headcanon stuff! :D

(I am not knowledgeable about this in a medical sense by any means, but I DO have a pretty bad case of ADHD so I still know exactly what I’m talking about)

First of all, in case you didn’t know, ADHD stands for Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. In non-fancy words, this means Okay Let’s Take Notes Oh My Gosh It’s A Butterfly Let’s Catch It, or A Bit Too Hyper And I Probably Shouldn’t Have A Lot Of Sugar, but there’s more than just that.

There are three major types of ADHD:

ADHD, combined type - This one is the most common type. I have this version of ADHD, and I know the most about it. This means you have trouble paying attention and get easily distracted, and you’re probably hyper or impulsive. This hyperactivity can sometimes last for a very long time, or a very short time. For me, I can be really tired and suddenly want to run a marathon, and then just go to sleep. Or, I can wake up really excited for absolutely nothing and stay that way for almost the whole day. The attention thing you actually can’t fix easily without medication, unlike people with a short attention span who don’t have ADHD. I’ve tried paying attention, and unless I hyperfocus on something (like right now, actually), I CANNOT pay attention for longer than a few minutes. I take medication every morning so my attention span is longer, but that’s really all I can do.

ADHD, impulsive/hyperactive type - This form of ADHD is only hyperactivity. It’s the least common and people with this type of ADHD are energized and can be impulsive or extremely hyper, but this has no affect on their attention span or distractibility. This type still can get distracted, but it’s much harder and they also can’t get into hyperfocus as much as the other two types.

ADHD, inattentive and distractible type - This type is kind of in the middle of how common it is, and it makes it harder to pay attention and you’re easily distractable, and it’s easier to go into hyperfocus (though honestly, I do not reccommend it, you forget to eat and everything). This doesn’t come with being hyper, easily energized, or impulsive, though again, you can still be so without being an ADHD combined type.

We still don’t know how ADHD is caused, but it’s probably genetic. It’s a brain-based biological disorder. Here’s where I get sciency because I had to look this up from multiple sources, so buckle your seatbelts.

People with ADHD have low dopamine levels. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter, a type of brain chemical, and can be found using positron emission tomography, or brain-scans. Brain metabolism in people, especially children, with ADHD is shown to be lower in parts of the brain controlling attention, social judgment (we’ll talk about that later), and movement.

Only 4 to 12 percent of children are actually diagnosed with ADHD, and interesting fact, boys are 2-3 times more likely to have hyperactive/combined ADHD than girls. This isn’t important, just a fun fact I guess.

Let’s move on to symptoms of ADHD!

For inattention:

1 - short attention span for age group

2 - difficulty listening to others

3 - hard time remembering details

4 - easily distractable

5 - forgetful often

6 - poor organization

7 - poor study skills

(I’ve got symptoms 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, AND 7.)

For impulsivity/hyperactivity:

1 - Often interrupts others

2 - Not a lot of patience

3 - Tends to blurt out answers

4 - Takes risks and doesn’t think before acting

5 - Has a hard time staying still

6 - Can’t be in one place for long

7 - Fidgets excessively

8 - talks a lot

9 - has hard time engaging in quiet activities

10 - Forgetfulness

11 - Has a hard time staying on tasks and often leaves works uncompleted.

(I’ve got symptoms 1, 2, 4 (the second part), 5, 6, 7, 8, 10, and 11.)

Also, as an added bonus, if you take medication for treatment, you also might experience symptoms of:

1 - insomnia

2 - decreased appetite

3 - stomachaches

4 - headaches

5 - jitteriness

6 - increased hyperactive behavior after the medication wears off.

Also just so you know a lot of people I know with ADHD get in trouble a lot for not paying attention so there’s that! (You don’t know HOW many times I’ve gotten detention for completely forgetting about homework, projects, or just not paying attention)

People with ADHD can also often be diagnosed with anxiety or depression, since dealing with it can be really stressful or make it feel too hard to deal with. (I’ve got anxiety, so I know exactly what this feels like, it’s difficult).

NOW, on to what I think Vio has!

I think Vio has ADHD, combined type, though the attention defecity shows more than the hyperactivity. The hyperactivity just doesn’t seem to match up with his character, as he doesn’t seem to get worked up that much at all. Sometimes when he’s stressed or under pressure, but even then not often. Still, he probably has combined type.

Also, the symptoms I’ve found he shows in the manga are as follows:

Inattention symptoms 1, 2, and 4. However, my personal headcanons also show him having symptoms 3, 6, and 7. I think he’d have a pretty good memory, but not a very sharp one, having a hard time remembering details like the order things happened or the time, but still having a good enough memory that he can rely on it when he needs to without much trouble. I also headcanon that time runs away from him often like me. Time flies with little to no prompting, as the saying goes. ^^

He also has impuslivity/hyperactivity symptoms 1, 3, and 8, though I also headcanon him to have symptoms 5, 6, and 7 as well. He’d probably have a hard time keeping himself from blurting out information, and as a coping mechanism he’s probably try to keep all his thoughts to himself, which explains why he doesn’t talk much to others in the manga. This isn’t a very good coping mechanism, by the way, keeping it all bottled up is just begging for disaster, and I should know.

As for treatment? He probably doesn’t know he has ADHD and just thinks everyone has the same problems he does and is just better at concealing them. When he finds out, either by research or being diagnosed by someone else, he’d probably be shocked.

“Wait, are you saying not everyone has trouble paying attention, staying focused, or sitting still, and even if they do it’s not even that bad? What?”

He’d also probably talk down to himself at some points after that because Vio I feel aims for perfection often, and having a mental disorder would be hard on him since it’s a sign he’s not perfect, which of course he isn’t duh.

After he finds out, he might take medication but mostly rely on therapy. Not an actual therapist, but talking to others about his problems would probably help him more than the medication and dealing with it on his own.

So, yeah! AND NOW, THE THING YOU’VE ALL PROBABLY BEEN TELLING ME TO LIST, HEADCANONS!

- Vio talks to Shadow and Blue the most about having ADHD, since they both might also have it and also they’re easy to talk to once you get to know them.

- He’s one of the types who goes into hyperfocus a noticeable amount. Not so often it’s a big problem, but you might see him at 2 AM furiously writing something down, and then at noon he’ll pass out from exhaustion because it turns out he wasn’t able to fall asleep because he suddenly Had To Do The Thing Right That Second And Couldn’t Stop.

- He’s also the type to get lost in space a lot thinking and you might mistake for sleeping if you can’t see his face. It’s not the same as hyperfocus, but it’s just as hard to get out of when I do it myself.

- He derails the conversation topic unintentionally and as a result tries not to start up conversations. By derailing the topic, I mean you’re talking about your favorite sweets and he’ll suddenly say something about the history of chocolate which will connect to the history of some other food he likes that suddenly turns into Did You Know Water Can Be A Torture Device and then suddenly you’re talking about different torture techniques that are really weird. Candy-->Torture that’s just how it goes sometimes.

- That One Kid Who People Don’t Know How To Talk To Because Their Interests Are Really Uncommon.

- He’s an... okay... notetaker, but try to read the notes and you’re ready to lose that game. His handwriting is terrible because he tries to write everything down before he forgets, which results in sloppiness.

- The medication side-effects he has are effects 1, 2, and 4, but mainly 1 because honestly it’s practically canon in this fandom that Vio has the hardest time sleeping out of the Links.

Most of these headcanons, actually, this entire post, might be me self-projecting but nevertheless I think Vio having ADHD really fits his character and I want to see more ADHD Vio stuff in this fandom because I really like the headcanon.

[shishirgupta]

8 Natural Ways to Get Relief from Arthritis Pain

Did you know? Nearly 180 million people in India have arthritis. And it is more common than diabetes, AIDS, and cancer. 

 If you are one of those arthritis patients, no one can tell better than you the experience of living with this life disturbing health condition. You have to go through sheer discomfort caused by joint pain and swelling, making you limits your mobility.

 It also leads to physical weakness, tiredness, and trouble sleeping. All these symptoms affect your routine life and overall wellbeing. 

 While there are many medications to ease pain and stiffness from arthritis, there are many natural ways to manage the symptoms. This way, you can minimize the occurrence of the discomfort caused by arthritis. Here are some proven ways to deal with your arthritis naturally. 

 Do Exercise:

 Doing exercise is one of the recommended ways to manage arthritis pain. But how it is possible to do exercise when arthritis pain stops yours from doing any physical activity? 

 Here you need to do only low impact workouts. 

 One of the key reasons for doing exercise is that it helps lose weight. Losing extra weight can minimize the burden on the joints, allowing them to heal and strengthen. Other benefits of doing the workout for arthritis are…

  Increasing the     body’s anti-inflammatory and pain-relieving abilities.

Releasing     “happy hormones” such as endorphins to improve your mood and minimize the     emotional effects of arthritis. 

Improving your     range of motion

Reducing the     risk of developing heart disease and diabetes arthritis patients often     face. 

 And even a light movement can work. The better workouts for arthritis patients are those who build strength and muscles around the joints, minimizing the risk of further damage. Some best low impact workouts for arthritis are yoga, walking and swimming. 

But avoid intense workouts like running. 

Try Acupuncture:

 In acupuncture, the human body is believed to store energy life force known as Qi, which gets restricted or blocked to specific points across the body. Acupuncture aims to open up these blockages by inserting needles to let your energy flow across the body. Don’t worry.

 Acupuncture needles don’t hurt as they create only tingling sensations. 

 While the science might not accept acupuncture as a general treatment, several studies have found that it can relieve pain associated with arthritis. Many patients who opt for acupuncture reported positive effects, including pain relief, improved sleep quality and tiredness. 

 Make sure to choose a reputed acupuncture specialist. 

 Perform Meditation:

 Relaxation is important to cope with diseases like arthritis, as stress triggers an inflammatory reaction in the body. Deep breathing, meditation and relaxation techniques can be useful in this scenario. Meditation minimizes your inflammation levels which in turn decreases tension, reducing pain.

            Moreover, mindfulness meditation can help people deal with chronic illness by improving emotional and mental health. It is a great tool to reduce anxiety, minimize depression and increase good sleep. All of these advantages can help people with arthritis improve their quality of life and make their condition less painful. 

 According to one study, even performing meditation for a few minutes a day can help decrease stress and pain response. While you can learn meditation with an experienced trainer, there are many meditation apps to practice this technique. 

 Get a Massage:

 Massage therapy is a safe and relaxing way to manage arthritis pain. There are many techniques used by a “massage expert” to work over your tissues and muscles, leading to deep relaxation. Gentle massage also improves blood circulation across your tissues, joints and muscles. With improved blood flow, your joints can get essential nutrients and oxygen to heal. As an added bonus, massage releases several “feel good” hormones to improve mood and reduce anxiety. 

 Regular massage therapy can lead to wellness and less stress, which is essential for arthritis patients. Self-massage and massage equipment can also help you get deep relaxation. 

 Hot and Cold Therapy:

 Arthritis patients can also use hot and cold therapy to manage their pain. These are simple yet effective ways to get relief from arthritis pain. 

Hot therapy can warm up the sore muscles and joints. A hot water bottle or a heating pad can be used to warm up and relax stiff joints. Or you can take a warm bath or hot shower, especially in the morning when arthritis symptoms are active. 

 Cold therapy is equally useful when it comes to easing swelling and inflammation. You can use a gel ice pack on the inflamed joints. But don’t apply it on the bare skin. A cold pack can numb the area and minimize the sensation of pain. You can use both hot and cold therapies to find out which is best for you. You can use a hot or cold compress for 2-3 times a day for up to 20 minutes per session. However, the temperature shouldn’t be extreme as it can hurt the skin. 

 Take Care of Your Diet:

 Diet can play an important role in arthritis symptoms management. According to one study, diet and workout can lower inflammation in arthritis. This study shows the relation between diet, inflammation and weight loss. People with arthritis can experience fewer inflammatory symptoms by controlling their weight via diet and workout. 

 Diet also leads to other benefits for arthritis. Like a workout, a proper diet can minimize your risk to develop chronic diseases that commonly develop with arthritis. A healthy diet also provides important nutrients to your bones, muscles and organs. A diet rich in omega-three fatty acids can minimize inflammation and disease activity. 

  Take Herbal Supplements:

 Some herbal supplements have been found efficient to minimize joint pain. Some of these are ginkgo, stinging nettle, thunder god vine, and devil’s claw. Certain herbs are said to include anti-inflammatory properties that can help manage the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis (RA) and osteoarthritis (OA). 

 Aloe vera is one of the popular herbs used as alternative medicine and is available in many forms such as powder, gels and pills. It is known for its healing power and anti-inflammatory properties. Cat’s claw is another anti-inflammatory herb that may minimize swelling in arthritis. It has been a traditional remedy to treat inflammation and boost the immune system. 

Make sure to talk to your doctor before taking any supplement. 

 Use Oils:

 Certain oils can help minimize inflammatory conditions associated with rheumatoid arthritis. For example, turmeric essential oil has been found useful in relieving the symptoms of arthritis. Thanks to its compound known as curcumin that checks the molecule responsible for triggering inflammation. Likewise, ginger oil is an effective remedy in minimizing joint pain and inflammation.

 It is equipped with the chemicals that turn into anti-inflammatory agents to deal with the symptoms of arthritis. 

 Lavender is also useful oil. According to one study, a mix of 5% lavender and some amount of almond oil can help in pain relief in arthritis. Eucalyptus is rich in pain-relieving compounds and anti-inflammatory effects. When applied topically on the skin, it reduces muscles pain, soreness and swelling. 

 Myrrh oil has anti-rheumatic properties and reduces the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis. It is often mixed with other essential oil such as frankincense for better results. 

 So these are some best ways to manage your arthritis pain naturally. What do you think? Let us know by commenting below!  

[yogaadvise]

Yoga for Insomnia

Each evening, an approximated 20 million people in the USA struggle to sleep-- troubled rest, insufficient sleep, or the lack of ability to even go to sleep (sleeping disorders). Sleep problems describes a continuous, ongoing inability to go to sleep at a routine time. People who deal with sleeplessness may have issues sleeping, feel irritable, really feel distressed concerning rest quality, and may obtain one great evening's sleep for several evenings of hard sleep.

Without adequate sleep, your body can experience physical and also psychological side results. Sleeping disorders can be caused by a blend of way of living as well as clinical conditions. For some people, insomnia is triggered by psychological tensions, like: stress and anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, or emotional injury. The lack of ability to drop asleep can additionally be lifestyle-related: diet regimen, medicines, family members background of insomnia, bad rest hygiene, or inadequate sleep top quality when you lastly do drop asleep. Due to this battle, nearly 4% of grownups rely on prescription-strength sleeping aids to drop asleep.

Not obtaining sufficient rest can create major health and wellness dangers. Poor sleep quality is associated with enhanced threat in heart condition, diabetic issues, stroke, and also hypertension, in addition to clinical depression, anxiety, and also poor cognitive function.

Using a yoga exercise routine for better rest: Many root causes of insomnia are lack of ability to kick back and also quiet the mind. By creating a nighttime yoga routine, you can grow relaxation at established nightly times. Researchers at Harvard Medical College located that a nightly yoga method boosted clients':

Sleep quality

Sleep efficiency

And total time asleep

While likewise helping the participants drop off to sleep much faster and with less sleep interruptions throughout the night.

A every night yoga exercise technique can calm the central nervous system (CNS), relieving stress and anxiety and also stress and anxiety. An every night yoga exercise technique additionally aids reduced high blood pressure, reduces muscle inflammation, and promotes physical relaxation.

Restorative yoga is a sort of yoga exercise that should be made use of in this sort of technique. It urges making use of props (cushions, obstructs, towels, or walls) to assist in achieving complete relaxation and remainder. An every night corrective technique integrates great deals of gentle spins (to purify), seated ahead folds (to lower high blood pressure), mild backbends (tranquility the nerves), and also heart-openers (open, loosen up, and recover psychological health). When coupled with reflection and breathing workouts, a restorative technique can assist relax the mind as well as prepare the body for bed.

How to establish a nightly yoga exercise routine

To reward sleep problems, established a nightly yoga exercise regimen. This need to become part of a normal method: see to it you do this every night, around the same time, before bed.

Practice in a dark or calming room. The lights don't need to be off, yet try to dim the lights preferably. Outside light hints, electronics, and also intense lights in your resting setting can cause way too much excitement prior to bed, and also can magnify insomnia.

Turn off your electronics, as well as rather attempt lighting your space with candles. Some experts advise using aromatherapy and also quiet, peaceful songs during this method time. This can advertise psychological relaxation as well as prepare your mind for bed, as high as your body.

Using Props: Do not hesitate to utilize props such as: cushions, towels, pillows, or blankets to support these poses and also promote relaxation.

During the technique, concentrate on balanced, deep breathing. Attempt to include these 8 poses:

8 Poses to Combat Insomnia

Salamba Balanasana-- Kid's Pose

How it works to promote sleep: This is a real resting pose that promotes leisure and peace, while soothing stress in the back, shoulders, neck, and also hips.

Try it: Stay up easily on your heels, then roll your torso forward, bringing your head to hinge on the floor or a pillow before you. Reduced your upper body to the flooring, concentrating on extending your arms as well as feeling the weight of your shoulders kick back. Hold the pose for 3-5 minutes, concentrating on deep breaths and softness.

Bonus: Extended puppy pose.

Supta Matsyendrasana-- Supine Spin Pose

How it works to promote sleep: Gentle spinal spins are made use of to help detox and also clean the body organs. This pose relieves bloating as well as gas while boosting circulation.

Try it: Lie on your back with your knees bent, feet level on the floor. Delicately roll your knees to the best side, keeping your shoulders pressed down towards the ground. Transform your head to the left, as well as press your knees with your ideal hand to deepen this stretch. Repeat on the various other side.

Viparita Karani-- Upper Hands The Wall surface Pose

How it works to promote sleep: This restorative posture is a vital stress reducer, and also is an easy inversion that relieves stress frustrations, stress and anxiety, and sleeplessness. When held for at the very least 5 mins (10-15 is chosen), this position delicately extends the lower back, upper body, legs, and shoulders, while reducing worn out, throbbing feet. The mild inversion eliminates anxiousness and also soothes the mind before bed.

Try it: For this present, you will need a wall as your overview. Start in a seated placement, 5-6 inches far from the wall. Swing your boosts onto the wall surface, with your shoulders and also head hing on the floor. Ideally, run your sit bones against the wall surface, so that your legs remain in a 90-degree angle with your hips. (For limited hamstrings, maintain your sit bones a couple of inches away from the wall, working closer as you gain versatility.) Maintain your upper body long, as well as enable your feet to push right into the wall surface. Keep your legs firm enough to hold them in place, however allow them to loosen up. Breathe deeply as gravity draws the weight from your legs toward the floor. Hold for 5-15 minutes.

Marjaryasana — Cat/Cow Pose

How it works to promote sleep: With each other, these 2 poses ease tension in the back, shoulders, and also low back. They additionally extend the back as well as open the breast, motivating a deep breath and psychological relaxation.

Try it: Beginning on your hands and also knees, with your wrists directly under your shoulders, knees are under your hips, and your legs hips'- width apart. Begin by relocating into Cow Pose: inhale as you drop your stomach toward your floor covering, lifting your head and breast, and gazing approximately the ceiling. Attempt not to pinch your back, however let it extend as you drop your stomach toward the floor.

Then, exhale as you attract your stomach to your spinal column, rounding your back towards the ceiling. Think about a pet cat extending its back: rounding the top back, and also launching the crown of your head toward the floor. Inhale as you return right into Cow present, and repeat this sequence 5-20 times.

Adho Mukha Sukhasana-- Easy Forward Bend Pose

How it works to promote sleep: The basic seated Sukhasana translates to very easy, comfy, or happy present. Adding an easy forward fold makes this soothing, relaxing, and restorative, by extending the back, shoulders, hips, knees, and ankle joints. The forward fold reduces stress and anxiety, excellent for a nightly routine.

Try it: Start in Easy Pose (Sukhasana), sitting cross-legged on the floor with a high, but loosened up upper body. With an inhale, reach both arms up overhead. Exhale and slowly bow forward, relaxing your arms, hands, and also temple on the floor covering. If your forehead can't touch the mat, attempt resting your head on your hands or a pillow, for included support. If your hips are also limited, attempt resting on a covering or boost block. Hold for up to 5 minutes.

Halasana — Plow Pose

How it works to promote sleep: Inversions stimulate the stomach organs and anxious systems, while decreasing anxiety as well as tiredness. This position soothes the brain, stimulates the stomach organs as well as thyroid gland, while offering a deep stretch in the shoulders, and also spine.

Try it: Begin lying level on the mat. Exhale as you press your arms into the flooring as you push your feet far from the flooring, delicately attracting the upper legs into your front upper body. Assistance your hips, as you would in supported shoulder-stand, as you slowly decrease your toes to the flooring past your head. Keep your torso vertical to the flooring, legs prolonged. You can support your pelvis or stretch the arms behind you on the flooring. For those new to shoulder-stands, you can relax your shoulders on a towel or covering. Hold for 1-5 minutess.

Supta Baddha Konasana-- Lying Butterfly (Bound Angle) Pose

How it works to promote sleep: Due to the fact that we hold so much of our everyday anxiety in our hips, this pose is a terrific method to on the surface revolve the hips and launch that tension. This extends the hips and also back, unwinds the shoulders, and also relieves the mind. A covering or prop can be made use of to make this a gentle heart-opener, as well.

Try it: Begin existing flat on the floor covering. Delicately bring the soles of your feet with each other, opening your knees to the sides. Position your arms on the flooring at your sides, hands dealing with up. Remain right here for up to 10 minutes, enabling gravity to kick back the hips as well as draw them to the floor. You can additionally begin in a seated placement, with a blanket behind you. Reduced your upper body carefully to the flooring as well as attract your feet with each other. Maintain your hands at your sides, palms dealing with up.

Savasana — Corpse Pose

How it works to promote sleep: This posture is typically utilized to wrap up yoga exercise courses because it is both corrective and also meditative. Therefore, it is optimal in a going to bed ritual for better rest. Remains pose decreases high blood pressure and also heart rate, stretches the arm or legs, and also straightens the back. This position likewise reduces muscular tissue tension, promoting leisure prior to bed.

Try it: Lie on your back with your legs directly and arms out at your sides, palms encountering up. Functioning from your toes up to the crown of your head, focus on launching stress in every part of your body. Let your breath take place naturally as you allow the weight of your body be up to the flooring, knowingly relaxing your legs, arms, upper body, and face.

Breathing and Meditation

Because our breath is so closely tied to our feelings as well as health, attempt consisting of assisted breathing workouts during your every night routine. This relaxes the mind, steadies the heart, as well as promotes relaxation.

- Left-nostril breathing, called Sura Bhedana, or "moon-piercing breath," is a strategy in hatha yoga exercise to calm the brain as well as body. Take 3-5 breaths to promote relaxation.

- Meditation: Attempt incorporating a directed meditation into your nightly practice.

Bonus

Try these Vinyasa streams 10-30 mins prior to bed. These are series made to assist soothe the mind as well as relax for a relaxing evening's rest:

10-Minute Nighttime Yoga with Brett Larkin

20-Minute Yoga Exercise for Bedtime with Adriene

Bedtime Yoga with Cole Chance

Yoga to Aid You Rest with Catalina Moraga

Bedtime Yoga Exercise to Calmness Your Nerves with Tim Senesi

[sapphic-sustrai]

Team DMNO Bios: Norbert Beaumont.

Okay, it’s finally time to talk about the third member of Team DMNO my soft non-binary sweetheart, Norbert Beaumont! Once again if there are any errors, I will go back and fix them eventually. Since I’ve changed Norbert’s last name, I will go back to the previous two bios and make the necessary edits.

Previous DMNO Bios:

Douglas Craig.

Melanie Hertz.

I’m going to preface this bio with a warning. When talking about Norbert’s backstory, there will be mentions of abuse {nothing too in depth, but I still wanted to give a heads up}. If this makes you uncomfortable, then please don’t keep reading I will completely understand. If you’d like to keep reading, then just be aware of what will be brought up. That being said, more info will be underneath the cut!

Full Name: Norbert Félix Beaumont, née Berger. Has been using their mother’s last name ever since the divorce of their parents.

Alias: The Meek Marksman {they’ll get a new alias eventually}.

Nickname{s}: Bert {mostly used by everyone}, Norb {only used by Olwen}, Bertie {only used by Melanie}, Norbie {only used by Douglas}, Soldier {only used by their older brother Albert}, Sharp Shooter {only used by Albert}, Runt {only used by their father Herbert}, Sweetie-Pie {only used by their paternal grandmother Bertha}, Significant Otter {only used by Douglas when they start dating}.

Age: 18 {Vol. 1-3}.

Gender: Non-Binary {they use both They/Them & He/Him pronouns}.

Race: Mountain Lion Faunus, they have a pair of hind paws for feet.

D.O.B/Star Sign: September 7th/Virgo.

Romantic/Sexual Orientation: Homoromantic Asexual.

Handedness: Left-handed.

Complexion: Pale-white. 

Height: 5’5 {165cm}, they’ll eventually have a small growth spurt later on.

Weight: 120lbs {54kg}, they’ll put on a bit more weight later on.

Body Type: Rectangular body shape, average height, lanky, not a lot of muscle, medium length legs, small delicate hands.

Hairstyle{s}:

Burr cut, looks almost bald {Youth}.

Crew cut {Vol. 1-3}.

Hair Colour{s}: Dark Brown.

Eye Colour: Greyish-green. 

Aura Colour: Camouflage Green.

Emblem: A five-pointed star, made up of arrows, with a cross-hair in the middle. The star outline is black, the star itself is camouflage green, the cross-hair and the point/fletching of the arrows are army green.

Weapon{s}: Compound Piercer MP7.

The Compound Piercer MP7 {Maschinenpistole 7} is a Heckler & Koch MP7 & compound crossbow mix, with the sub-machine gun as the base mode.

When using the crossbow function, the limbs will jut out from the side of the gun with the strings attached.

The primary colours of the gun are metallic grey & silver. The limbs, the trigger, the magazine & the barrel of the gun are charcoal black. The string and the grips are black.

The sub-machine gun primarily fires out armour piercing high velocity rounds consisting of alloy plated steel jacket {DM21} projectiles. They contain various different types of dust; they have different effects depending on which dust type is being used. The crossbow fires out aluminum arrows and has dust stored in the tips.

The cross-hair has a couple of different modes which include, x-ray, inferred & night vision.

It comes with a couple of accessories which includes a suppressor for more quiet shots & a tactical flashlight. Both of these accessories are silver & black.

Norbert’s emblem is etched into the right side of the gun’s body.

Types of Dust Used: Norbert uses all kinds of dust, but their three favourites to use are Rock, Plant & Gravity dust. 

Other Equipment:

Military Pouches {Both are black and there’s one on each side of their belt. The one on the left is where they keep their dust crystals. The one on the right is where they keep their handheld telescope}.

Handheld Telescope {A small telescope that is typically used by the Atlesian Military’s soldiers that fits in the palm of their hand. It was given to them by their paternal grandmother Bertie as a present for their 10th birthday. It’s silver, with a black grip and the Atlas logo etched into the side in black}.

Gun Strap {It’s black, with a charcoal black shoulder pad. It’s attached to their weapon so that it’s at their side at all times when in combat.

Quiver {Where Norbert keeps their arrows and it’s attached to their gun strap. It’s silver, with a black lid}.

Gun Case {What they use to carry around their weapon when not in use. It has a hard metal casing which is silver, with a black handle and the interior padding is dark grey. It has their logo etched in on the lid}.

Fighting Style: Norbert usually prefers a, “run and gun”, style of fighting. They’re usually on the move, so that they can help out their teammates at any given moment. Their alternative approach is to try and find a spot to camp at, so that they can snipe from a safe distance.

Semblance: Flash Grenade - A semblance that allows the user to create a small aura-based stun grenade in the palm of their hand, which they can launch at the opposition. The targets will feel disoriented and stunned for a brief period of time. At the moment, Norbert can only target up to three targets at one time. Their semblance can also affect Grimm, with the added bonus of causing them to feel searing pain {almost as if their bodies are sizzling}.

Other Skills, Talents, etc…

Known for being highly intelligent.

An excellent strategist.

Has incredible planning & organization skills

Has good computer skills.

Well versed in all areas of science, but is mostly knowledgeable in the subjects of chemistry & robotics.

Vast knowledge on the Atlesian military thanks to their grandmother.

Current Affiliation: Atlas Academy.

Previous Affiliation: Mount Alsius Academy.

Place of Origin: Atlas. When living with their Father, they lived in an upper-class area near the mountains. After the divorce, their mother relocated them & their older brother Albert to the City of Atlas.

Current Occupation{s}: Student, Hunter-in-Training.

Team/Status: DMNO. Currently active, but will become inactive soon after the Fall of Beacon. Won’t be active again for quite some time.

Team Members: Douglas Craig, Melanie Hertz, themselves & Olwen Kunik.

Partner: Douglas Craig.

Team Role: Ranged flanker, support & team strategist.

Status: Alive.

Mental Health Issues: Generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, OCD {mostly with counting & arranging}, PTSD {due to the mental & emotional abuse from their father Herbert & their eldest brother Bertrand}, and panic disorder. They take medication for all of these and they also have a couple of coping mechanisms to help them when their symptoms get out of hand. 

Positive Qualities: Organized, hardworking, helpful, disciplined, modest, kind, gentle.

Neutral Qualities: Emotional, obedient, skeptical, soft, is a private person.

Negative Qualities: Anxious, indecisive, fussy, self-pitying, they are a worrier, has a hard time accepting reality {if something bad happens, they mentally shut down}, perfectionist.

Likes:

Tinkering with machinery {specifically anything to do with robotics}.

Doing chemical experiments.

Crossword/Sudoku puzzles.

Studying.

Cleaning/organizing their living space.

Solving their Rubik’s cube.

Early mornings.

Building model cars, planes & trains.

Playing Chess.

Dislikes:

Peanut Butter {they’re allergic}.

Tomatoes {they hate the taste of them and the texture}.

Untidy living spaces & filth in general.

Doesn’t like it when their personal space is invaded.

Hates it when people try to spook them in any sort of way.

Sleeping in {they like to get the most out of their day}.

Horror related media.

Favourite…?

Food: Pot roast, with mashed potatoes & mixed vegetables. They also love roast beef sandwiches on whole wheat bread.

Drink: Tea {especially earl grey, chamomile & sleepy time}.

Season/Weather: Spring/rainy days.

Colour: Army green & slate grey.

Animal: Ferrets & cats.

Movie Genre: Science fiction & historical period dramas.

Music Genre: classical, jazz & musical theatre.

Relationships:

Herbert Jr. Berger:

Relationship: Biological Father, distant, very bad.

Status: Alive.

Ambre Beaumont:

Relationship: Biological Mother, distant, strained.

Status: Alive.

Bertrand Berger:

Relationship: Biological Older Brother, by 10 years, distant, very bad.

Status: Alive.

Albert Beaumont:

Relationship: Biological Older Brother, by 6 years, good.

Status: Alive.

Bertha Gehring:

Relationship: Paternal Grandmother, good.

Status: Alive.

Herbert Sr. Berger:

Relationship: Paternal Grandfather, good.

Status: Deceased.

Melanie Hertz:

Relationship: Closest Friend, teammate, good.

Status: Alive.

Douglas Craig:

Relationship: Close friend, partner, crush.

Status: Alive.

Olwen Kunik:

Relationship: Close friend, teammate, good.

Status: Alive.

Team RWBY:

Relationship: Friends, good overall, gets along with Weiss the best, gets along with Ruby the least.

Status: Alive.

Team JNPR:

Relationship: Friends, good overall, gets along with Ren the best, gets along with Nora the least.

Status: Alive {Pyrrha’s alive in this AU}.

Winter Schnee:

Relationship: Friend, good, but they’re slightly scared of her.

Status: Alive.

Penny Polendina:

Relationship: Friends, good.

Status: Alive, then deceased, then rebuilt and brought back to life.

Ciel Soleil:

Relationship: Friends, good.

Status: Alive.

Early Life {Backstory}:

Norbert was born and raised in the Kingdom of Atlas.

They were raised in a prestigious & wealthy military family. For the first couple of years of their life, they lived with their father Herbert Berger, their mother Ambre Beaumont and their two older brothers Bertrand Berger & Albert Beaumont. They lived in a mansion located in a wealthy neighborhood near the mountains.

Their paternal grandmother Bertha Gehring was the previous general of the Atlesian Military, before General James Ironwood succeeded her. Her son Herbert would follow in this mother’s military footsteps and became a brigadier general. The eldest brother Bertrand is currently a captain and the 2nd oldest Albert is a member of the special operatives unit. Ambre on the other hand is a psychiatrist. She used to work at a clinic in Atlas, but she has since moved on to operating her own clinic for the last 7 years.

To the public, Norbert’s father was a stern but respected member of the military… that was known for making a few, “questionable decisions”. However, behind closed doors he was an absolute tyrant who ruled his household with an iron fist. He was downright cruel towards almost every single member of his family, except for Bertrand who he considered to be, “his favourite”. He would mistreat his wife and physically abuse/forget about his son Albert… but Norbert was the one that he targeted the most.

In Herbert’s household, he doesn’t tolerate weakness, which was why Norbert was often targeted by their father. Norbert was often emotionally & mentally abused because they were viewed to be a weakling in their father’s eyes. Everything was expected to be perfect and if Norbert couldn’t deliver, then they’d be punished. He also had no qualms with letting his eldest son Bertrand to invade Norbert’s personal space, stealing/destroying their things and even physically harm them. It’s because of their father & Bertrand that Norbert developed most of the mental health issues that they still deal with to this day.

However, there were three people who did support and love Norbert during their childhood. There was their mother, their other older brother Albert and their paternal grandmother. These three would often stick by Norbert and had to confront Herbert & Bertrand on several occasions.

Eventually Ambre had enough of her husband and how he treated her and the rest of the family. She, Norbert & Albert had to hide their Faunus heritage from the public and were never allowed to attend parties/social events… all because Herbert was ashamed of them. Finding out that he only wanted to marry her because of the perks and wealth that came with her last name was the final nail in the coffin. By the time Norbert was 10 years old, Ambre had filed for a divorce from her husband and it was one of the happiest days of Norbert’s life.

Ambre had custody over Norbert & Albert, which her now ex-husband was perfectly okay with. At this point in time Bertrand was already 20 years old and had firmly sided with his father, so Ambre gave up trying to have a relationship with her eldest son. Ambre moved herself and her children from the mountains to the city of Atlas for a new start. She was determined to start up her own psychiatric clinic, where she never had to hide who she was from anyone and do things her way. Eventually, Norbert’s grandmother Bertha came to live with the family to help out Ambre when things got busy.

Things were great for about a year after the divorce, unfortunately Ambre soon became a workaholic focusing more on her business than her family. With Albert off at combat school and soon preparing to attend Atlas Academy, Norbert only really had their grandmother Bertha around and they felt incredibly lonely.

They’ve always wanted to join the Atlesian Military ever since they were a young child. They’ve always wanted to make a difference and help the people of Remnant through their two greatest strengths support and science. They’ll mention that Albert & their grandma Bertha as two of their biggest inspirations for joining the military.

They first attended an elite combat school known as Mount Alsius Academy, named after what Atlas Academy used to be known as, Alsius. They mostly kept to themselves around this period of time because not a lot of people were interested in befriending them. They’re hoping that once they’re at Atlas, that maybe they’d finally meet some people that they could hopefully call their friends. They were both excited and nervous about attending Atlas, but they were ready for change and they were ready to make it happen.

Primary Attire {Youth}:

Button Up Shirt {white, with white buttons, long-sleeved, buttoned up all the way, except for the top button}.

Bowtie {black}.

Suit Vest {grey, with black buttons, buttoned up all the way}.

Suit Pants {grey, with black button & zipper}.

Leather Penny Loafers {black}.

Atlas Academy Uniform:

Norbert wears the standard Atlas Academy boy’s uniform.

Primary Attire {Vol. 1-3}:

Wool Felt Military Beret {black, with their emblem stitched into the brim, it was a present from their grandmother Bertha}.

Tactical Shirt {light grey, with arctic camouflage arms & neck, long-sleeved, fully zipped at the neck, has a Velcro pocket on each arm}.

Puffy Vest {black, with a silver zipper, ¾’s zipped up}.

Combat Gloves {black}.

Tactical Utility Belt {black, with a black plastic buckle, includes military pouches}.

Fatigue Pants {black, with the pantlegs tucked into their boots.

Wool Socks {grey}.

Tactical Military Boots {black, with black laces}.

Other Notes About Appearance:

They’ve been told that they have a, “baby face”. Douglas thinks that it’s cute.

Has short side-burns, they’re squared.

Doesn’t have any facial hair, usually likes to be clean shaven.

Doesn’t have any tattoos or piercings right now, but they’ve been considering getting a small tattoo and ear piercings at some point in the future.

They obtain a medium-sized scar on the bridge of their nose from the Fall of Beacon.

If They Had a Voice it Would Be: Justin Briner {Current}, Lara Woodhull {Youth}.

Misc. Trivia:

Norbert has excellent hand-eye coordination skills and Albert thinks that this is why they are quite the sharp shooter. Anything that involved shooting targets, Norbert would hit every single one.

They have a pet ferret named Scout. They have Scout registered as an emotional support animal and they help Norbert whenever they’re having an anxiety & panic attacks. They also have a pet British Shorthair cat named Eleanor at home and they usually stick around their grandmother these days.

Norbert has been playing the piano since they were 3 years old and they’re quite good at it. Sometimes they’ll play alongside Melanie who’ll jam out on the guitar. Douglas wants Norbert to give him a piano lesson at some point.

Many have noticed that Norbert is the type that, “talks with their hands”. They often make elaborate hand gestures when speaking to someone.

They have atychiphobia {a fear of failure}.

They always write in cursive; it’s been like this ever since learning how to do so at the age of 9.

That’s all that I have for Norbert right now! I may have been a bit late posting this and I’m sorry about that! Any comments or critiques would be greatly appreciated and my askbox is always open! I’m going to try to get the last member of DMNO Olwen’s bio out by next weekend! 

[theheartofpenelope]

SIMPLE THINGS - Chapter three

Chapter three - excerpt : No. Not butterflies. Never butterflies. Fireflies! It would seem the little leftover rascal had found a friend. Two little beetles together, having fun and carefully shedding some light on her forlorn heart. Their fluttering however barely noticeable - still, there they were. And they did manage to somehow manifest themselves more clearly when Charlotte finally set foot in the lobby at the established hour. 'Nasty little buggers'.

Tag list: @winterisakiller, @devikafernando, @scorpionchild81, @messy-insomniac-bookgirl, @smutsausage, @hiddlesbitch1 @noplacelikehome77 @wolfsmom1 @meh1217 @dina-bln @lilaeye39 @tinchentitri @fairlightswiftly @nonsensicalobsessions @wolfsmom1

Author’s Notes/Warnings: Not beta’d. And thank you in advance for feedback - would love to know what you think...

Also on AO3 through this link

Bonus: click here for the pinterest moodboard (always updated)

Chapter three

London - Day twelve

Oh, curse those nervous jitters… Charlotte looked up from the desk and scanned the spectators in the conference room. They lied about those bright lights, she thought, they don’t completely black out the audience. Damn it.

She exhaled quietly and took a drink from her glass of water while the power point-presentation was started up for her. She could do this. There was no doubt. She repeated it in her mind like a mantra. Her mind would surely come around soon, however her stomach was in knots.

God, I have to find a way around this soon. Very soon. Close your eyes Charlie, take a deep breath.

Charlotte would hear the spectators shuffling in their seats, the subtle buzz of people talking and flipping through their syllabi while they waited…. It was always the same story. That same petrifying and paralysing stage fright that kept on haunting her, wherever she would go. The absolute horror of getting that first sentence out there… but then, once she was past that, she would be on a roll. She knèw it. If only she could get at that point easier or faster somehow.

So Charlotte tried reminding herself some of the reassuring words friends and family had spoken to her to break her anxiety. Her brother’s “imagine the crowd in their kinkiest underwear!” never ceased to make her smirk just a little bit. But today, it was Tom’s “you’re passionate about your work. You’ll be fine,” that suddenly echoed through her mind. It brought a slight smile to her face and gave her that much-needed boost of confidence she was looking for.

And on that high, Charlotte confidently launched her theories on medical assistance with end of life decisions from her professional yet controversial point of view. Ready to take on the world. Preferably by storm. The feedback after her presentation was larger than she had expected and made for an interested debate in the auditorium as well as captivating conversations during the ensuing lunch break.

When the colloquium concluded for the day, Charlotte felt both satisfied and exhausted. As she walked back to her hotel room all she really longed for was a hot bath and a good book in that pristine air-conditioned hotel room. She was however surprised at the fact that the hotel manager, while handing her back her room key, informed her a message had been left for her at the front desk.

A wave of worry rippled through her, and a monster like claw clenched itself around anxious heart. She feared at first that some emergency had occurred family-wise, but then surely they would have tried calling her cell phone? They knew she kept the device close to her at all times. Surely, they would have rang,… wouldn’t they?

While she questioned the manager if he was absolutely sure, he spelled her name to which she could only nod affirmatively.

Maybe it was a work-related issue? An urgent case-file perhaps? My god, please not now, she wished. It was as if, after the debate all energy had escaped her body.

She longed for her home, her living room, where she could curl up in her favourite nook of the sofa with a good book and some lounge music playing in the background.

A large yellow manila envelope was handed to her. It weighed light in her hands. It couldn’t hold more than one page, she concluded, so hardly a professional emergency. Her mind worriedly drifted back to her family, the monster claw tightened his grip around her heart. Good news rarely came in tiny packages…

Charlotte opened the envelope in the elevator. She had no patience. It was somewhat of a problem, but on a professional level it was one of her best traits. On the beautiful hotel stationary a message was typed out. Apparently a phone call had come in, requesting her. The message was short and to the point, and with a sigh of relief her lips curved into a smile as her eyes scanned the narrative.

I hope your day went well. You’re very kindly invited to a small gathering of people tonight. It’s Ben’s birthday -  so you can’t really say no. Meet me in the lobby at 6.30 PM. Dress casually; it’s an outside event. Greetings from Tom.

Her unfounded agony quickly made way for butterflies. No. Not butterflies. Never butterflies. Fireflies! It would seem the little leftover rascal had found a friend. Two little beetles together, having fun and carefully shedding some light on her forlorn heart. Their fluttering however barely noticeable - still, there they were. And they did manage to somehow manifest themselves more clearly when Charlotte finally set foot in the lobby at the established hour. Nasty little buggers.

Her choice of attire earned her that first broad smile of his. Talk about an icebreaker.

“M’lady,” Tom unfolded himself from his seat and gave her a polite nod accompanied with a gentle wink. “Good sir,” Charlotte beamed at the elegant appearance in front of her, “will this do?” “You look lovely darling,” he kissed her on the cheek. There was that wonderful scent again. His beard softly brushed against her cheek, “I’m pleased you made it.” “Well you didn’t exactly give me the chance to say no, did you?” she impishly reprimanded. “It’s all Benedict really. He requested your presence for his birthday. I have nothing to do with it.” “No, you’re just the innocent messenger,” Charlotte teased. “Quite right,” he added with a proud nod, “we – I mean he thought you might appreciate the warmth of company, rather than a lonely hotel room.” “How very considerate of,” she paused calculatedly, “him,”

A mischievous grin followed as he offered her his arm, “let’s go, shall we?”

After that successful lecture she was oozing with confidence. She felt quite bold and adventurous all of a sudden. But Charlotte also had a lousy sense of direction and once in Tom’s car she internally fretted whether this was a good idea or not. Where was she headed? Was he a good driver? The control freak in her fought for supremacy, whereas her tired mind looked forward to an evening of mystery and was more than eager to surrender herself to whatever surprises that might cross her path in the course of the evening. Charlotte wriggled in her seat and it didn’t go by unnoticed.

“Are you alright darling?” he queried humorously. “Yes,” she nodded before adding with a kind-hearted laugh, “actually no. You drive on the other side of the road for starters.”

There was that second broad smile of the night.

“Also,” she puffed out a short exhale, “I’m suddenly very aware that I am putting my life in your hands here.” He glanced over at the young woman next to him and nodded in earnest now, “I am aware.” “Be careful with it?” it sounded more flirtatious than she had intended. But it was immediately rewarded with a lopsided smile of his and his heartfelt word. “I promise that you will not regret having put your trust in me…”

2.  

When the front door swung open, it revealed a very happy birthday boy. Benedict was obviously in tremendous good spirits and cheerfully he guided his guests into his home. As they exchanged pleasantries, he watched his friend guide his ‘plus one’ for the evening inside. And it occured to him then and there that it really was a delightful thing to see.

Tom had run this particular idea past Benedict earlier that day. He’d mentioned having spent the previous night out and about with Charlotte and just felt like maybe, surely, it would a fitting thing to invite her to this little get-together. ‘So she could spend an evening in pleasant company rather than in a lonely hotel room. You know just to reciprocate that informal BBQ-event from earlier that month’. However, Tom was not the one throwing the party.

It had taken Benedict no consideration at all to agree with Tom’s idea. Finally, he teased, you’re bringing a ‘plus one’ for a change… Tom had chuckled and rolled his eyes at this. ‘No, no, none of that. She’s pleasant company, it’s the right thing to do and that was that.’

But, in secret, he did look forward to spending some more time with her. Her and her warm laugh, her perceptive humour and quick wit. He wanted to know how her lecture had been, had it been well received? Was she happy about her day, what were her further plans, what was that book again she’d labelled a must-read for him the previous night… He felt as though there were more questions to ask, more stories to be shared. All purely platonic of course.

Tom still kicked himself a bit for having acted so forward earlier that month. And he was quite hesitant about meeting her again in the Theatre the night before. All ‘should he or shouldn’t he’. Should he ignore that anything had ever happened between them earlier on, or should he offer - another - apology about it? All this apprehension on his part had instantly vanished though the moment he’d set his eyes on her again in the Theatre yesterday. It had been lovely to see her again, to talk to her again. And he quickly concluded that the past was merely water under the bridge. She didn’t seem to be hung-up on it. So neither should he. He was only hung up on her. But… pure platonically. Of course.

Because Tom was far too rational to believe in silly, trivial things such as love at first sight. His mind didn’t deem it possible. You just cànnot fall in love with someone you don’t know. However he did accept there was something like ‘lust at first sight’. And that had to be what it was. It was the only explanation for what had occurred twelve days ago. That and alcohol. After all, the facts were the facts. He’d spend weeks on end travelling around the globe, suffering jet lag after jet lag, answering all the same questions all over again. (Although creatively repackaged by every single interviewer or talk show host, bless them.)

And while it was unquestionably exciting to launch the new movie, beyond pleasing to finally be able to reward all fans for their relentless support and anxiously await their reactions, at the end of the day - in whatever time zone he was residing-  Tom was exhausted, lonesome and yearning for home, his home, his dog, his family. Full stop.

That night at ComiCon was the early prelude to his 8 week-hiatus. He’d let go of everything and was enchanted with conversations that for once did not centre around his work. He might have had a gin tonic too many, that was true. But he did enjoy the fact his mind was allowed to roam free for a while. Charlotte had asked the right questions, said the right things, she was a breath of fresh air and he –foolishly- took it.

Tom snapped out of his thoughts when he’d heard Benedict mentioning his wife Sophie was just putting their 2 children to bed. A pang of remorse went through him; there was an anecdote he had promised to share with them that evening and now it was too late. His remorse must have been showing, because Benedict was quick to suggest Tom could – if he wanted to - just run up very-very quickly to say goodnight and share whatever his kids had been going on and on about that afternoon. ‘Just don’t wind them up too much‘, Benedict warned in a true paternal style.

Though relieved, Tom’s attention momentarily drifted back to Charlotte. He couldn’t just leave her there all alone, now could he? That would be bad form on him towards his ‘plus one’. But Benedict – bless his heart – had already quipped that he would make sure to introduce Charlotte to the rest of the group in the meantime. He’d offered her his arm, which she did not hesitate to accept, and with a soft chuckle Charlotte urged Tom to go ahead and visit the children before Benedict galantly led her the way to the garden.

3. The sight immediately took Charlotte’s breath away. The heat in London was unbearable. Even at night the temperatures hardly dropped. The sight of a peaceful garden party under a canopy of trees brought joy to her heart. Forget that bath and that book. Air-conditioning or not. Here a person could breathe and come back to earth again…

The guests consisted of a small group of people, mostly Benedict’s closest friends from college days. And as promised, Charlotte was kindly introduced to the group, who was very welcoming towards her. She was seated on a picnic bench at a picture perfect table. A genuine and spontaneous debate ensued when Charlotte answered toward the reason of her stay in the city. Frankly, she’d gotten quite used to the level of controversy end of life-matters created and she readily met all opinions that bounced onto her - both pro and contra her reasoning - with diplomacy, tact and humour.

She wasn’t aware of Tom’s return until she felt his hand softly resting against her shoulder blade. “I see you’re blending in well,” he whispered softly as he took the seat to her side. “Kids went too sleep alright?” Benedict queried as he sweetly placed a kiss on his wife’s lips as she momentarily rested against the armrest of his chair. “Perfect,” Sophie replied, “Uncle Tom apparently reads the best bedtime-stories,” “I made a promise,” a timid laugh on his behalf, “and I don’t like to break my promises.” “Hmm, I’m amazed no one has made you a godfather yet,” Benedict’s wife pondered quietly. “Well, maybe now’s a better time than ever?” Benedict chuckled as he placed his hand on his wife’s stomach, “after this perfect birthday present ever.”

The table went dead quiet as the news of the pregnancy slowly sank in. If Charlotte hadn’t felt out of place before, she sure felt like it now. Within seconds congratulations were up in the air, friends kissed and hugged the expecting couple while a very confused yet proud Tom solemnly swore to take his duty as godfather very seriously.

Charlotte evidently made a point of congratulating both parents before turning to her side to extend her heartfelt wishes to a visibly affected Tom. Without thinking she enthusiastically planted a sweet kiss onto his cheek. She was the first and only one who did. It flattered him. It graced her.

The announcement was the joyous prelude of what turned out to be an easy-going and quite entertaining evening. Charlotte was delighted at how the friendliness of the company quickly enclosed her, how they were mindful of her in conversations and elaborated on some background details so she would be able to follow. Her eyes had darted from the group of friends to Tom on occasion. She particularly enjoyed how at times his words could make her feel as though she was the only one he was talking to.

She was introduced to some silly British party games and laughed profusely when the moment came for the real birthday celebration. Tom kindly narrated the usual order of their silly ritual and Charlotte rested her hand on his arm when she was stuck in a fit of giggles because of it.

Tom was thoughtful and attentive. At the slightest shiver he had draped his jacket over her shoulders before he offered to fetch the pashmina she’d left in his car.

Their interaction had a familiar feel to it. It just … worked. If she would have to put it into words, she would probably confess that he made her feel welcome and appreciated. She honestly never would have put any more rational thought into it. That is until Benedict’s wife struck up a conversation with her while Tom had sauntered off in search of Charlotte’s scarf.

The brunette leaned in a bit closer from across the table and exchanged a kind smile with Charlotte. “I see Tom’s taking good care of you,”

Linguistically it was a simple observation, but everybody knows that in between women a lot can be said through simple observations. Perhaps even more than we hold dearly. “Yes, he’s very considerate,” Charlotte agreed, after all it was true. “How long have you two been seeing each other?”

A loud cackle escaped from Charlotte’s throat. She wasn’t even aware she could cackle. She feverishly giggled the comment away, and hoped she didn’t turn beet red in the process. “No, no,” she shook her head, “believe me, no dates here… I’m just a ‘plus one’ for the evening – a pity invite if you will.”

But the expecting brunette simply smiled encouragingly under a knowing nod and continued as if Charlotte had never protested against her question. “Men like these are hard to come by…”

It was a beautiful and very fitting compliment towards Tom. He earned all credit in that department. He was handsome but not the in-your-face kind of way, he was attentive but also deliciously masculine. He was intelligent and hilariously funny when he wanted to be. And, though tipsy, he had proven to being a great kisser… Ok, ok, so he would be a catch. But Charlotte wasn’t really looking for anything. Right? Right.

”Believe me, Charlotte,” she nudged, “I know.” She caught Sophie secretively and not so secretively rewarding her doting husband with a wink. A testament of a deep and true love, it warmed Charlotte’s heart.

4.

If she had to be honest, Sophie’s words did resonate with her. Charlotte excused herself to go to the restroom, while in fact she just wanted to get away from the conversation. She let the cold water run over her wrists, checked her make-up in the mirror and sighed. Charlotte had wanted to blame the alcohol for giving someone courage to blurt out such a fictitious statement, but Sophie was undeniable sober because hello - pregnant?

Charlotte’s inner control freak had allowed her only one glass of champagne so she was indisputably lucid enough to see things for what they were. Her tireless mind kindly reminded her Tom hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol since his first and only glass of champagne, being the designated driver and all.

As Charlotte’s mind quickly recapped it concluded that Tom was just being charming and chivalrous. So definitely-maybe pregnancy hormones were plaguing Sophie. And possibly she was just joking, after all how good did Charlotte really know her?

But more, much more than this Charlotte was astonished why she was even given this silly remark so much thought. Why was she getting worked up over this? After all, she was going home the following day. She would never see Tom - or anyone else for that matter - again after this evening. As the realisation hit, her stomach dropped a bit.

Charlotte scolded herself and commanded herself to stop being so pubertal about it. Still deep in thought she strolled back out onto the patio, taking a moment to admire the scenery. A couple of women sat chatting at the table, in the backyard a small group of friends were quarrelling over a game of Kubb. It really was a lovely evening, she mused, and she owed it to herself to enjoy it more profusely.

"Hi,” his accustomed voice rang into her ear. With a smile Charlotte greeted Tom as he walked out of the house himself, “hi.” “Found it,” he held up her pashmina proudly as he walked up to her. He was tall; it made her thankful she’d opted to wear a reasonable height in pumps… “You look good,” Charlotte pondered.

Shit. Was that out loud?

“Better rested, I mean. You look… better rested.” Charlotte hastened to add and stumbled over her words. She laughed and shook her head; her hand carefully rubbing her forehead in the process, “oh I’m tripping over my words tonight, aren’t I?” “You’re tired,” Tom concluded amused. “I am,” she agreed, “I think I have more understanding for you and your travelling ways now. It seems so glamorous from afar, but …” “It does get under your skin, doesn’t it?” She nodded with a smile, “hmm.” “Allow me,” he offered. And though Charlotte chuckled and mentioned it was fine, Tom remained adamant in his intent to drape the refined accessory over her shoulders.

Perfect gentleman, see Sophie? A mere perfect gentleman.

“I can’t get over how beautiful this place is,” Charlotte mentioned while he dutifully unfolded the silky scarf, “such a quiet green oasis in the midst of the madness.”

“Mmm, it’s quite something, isn’t it? Sophie really has a knack for design and decorating… ” he added while frowning over which side was in and wish side was out.

“Thanks for bringing me here,” Charlotte smiled at the sight of Tom stubbornly struggling along, “that was very considerate of you. Thank you.” A humorous sigh escaped Charlotte’s lips and she shook her head in comical despair  “I keep repeating myself.”

“You do,” he answered softly, locking his eyes with hers momentarily, “but I don’t mind repeating you’re very welcome.”

He turned the pashmina in his hands around proudly, “I think I’ve got in now…” and with that draped it around her and over her shoulders.

Charlotte enjoyed the languid rhythm of their conversation. It contrasted so marvellously towards the hectic day that had left her drained. And the entertaining festivities in the evening had allowed her to release all the built-up adrenaline. Fatigue fell over her like a soft blanket and she supressed a yawn but held a chuckle when she saw him bunching up the material as he tried out some type of elegant knot. Her hands clasped over his, “no, no, not like that, no knots…”

“Christ I’m helpless at this, I’m afraid,” he admitted with a sigh as his eyes briefly locked with hers. “But such a beautiful summer night, isn’t it? Festivities, music in the air,"  he continued and gestured towards her, "pleasant company, …”

Charlotte’s mind short circuited for a moment when she caught him looking at her again. With sympathy. His look was honest and warm, his eyes mesmerizingly blue. She saw his tongue quickly dart over his lips as he breathed in, ready to speak on.

And though her heart thundered in her chest, she didn’t feel any warmer. Not one bit. Quite the contrary. An observable shiver ran across her spine.

“Are you all right darling? Are you cold, still?” Tom questioned apprehensively.

Charlotte - grateful for the diversion that allowed her to tear her eyes away from Tom at long last - shook her head, hoping it would chase away this sudden cloud of confusion that had started to enclose her. She pulled the pashmina higher and tighter over her shoulders, wishing she could curl up and hide in it altogether.

“No, just tired. I get cold when I’m tired,” she tilted her head, “It’s erm – it’s been a long day.”

“Oh! Right,” he remembered, his right hand flying to his head at his silly neglect.

“And I have a breakfast meeting tomorrow, …”

“Surely, no talks about death over breakfast already?”

“Well... yes. Basically,” Charlotte smiled apprehensively, “we’re a fun group, I tell you.”

“Shall I take you back to your hotel?” he voiced his concern.

“No, no, I don’t want to impose, I could get a taxi just as well…”

“I’ll have none of that,”

“I know, but I’m fine.”

“Even if you did - and you are most definitely not -” he interrupted her kindly, “I’d happy to oblige nonetheless. C’mon, let’s go.” And with that he ran his warm hand up and down her spine reassuringly, an effort to bring her warmth... but Charlotte only shivered once more.

[rachelsreviews13]

My Top 20 of 2018 (with 3 bonus songs) 1. “Jumpsuit” Twenty One Pilots – I was so excited when this song was released in the summer with news of an album in the fall. “Jumpsuit” is by far my favorite on Trench and I have loved it since my first listen. The heavy bass and Tyler’s screams at the end make this song amazing. Although this song did not become as big as I believe it should have, it defines the start of the Trench era and is my number one this year. 2. “Youngblood” 5 Seconds of Summer – This is another song that I absolutely loved on the first listen. The rhythm, the drums, the bass, the vocals; everything makes it catchy and creates a song that is easy to jam out to. “Youngblood” is a unique and well-written song that has to be second on my list. 3. “High Hopes” Panic! At the Disco – I have a trend with all these top songs that I loved on the first listen; yes, “High Hopes” is another one. This is a fun, upbeat song from Panic! At the Disco. Of course, Brendon Urie’s vocals are amazing. My favorite part is during the last chorus when everything in the background is quiet and then there’s a boom as the drums bring it all back in. All of these elements make it my number three in my Top 20. 4. “Natural” Imagine Dragons – Imagine Dragons never disappoint. They made another hit single this year with “Natural.” Dan Reynold’s growling vocals deliver this powerful song while the drums back him up. The lyrics and musicality put “Natural” high on the list for 2018. 5. “you should see me in a crown” Billie Eilish – I had heard of Billie Eilish in 2017 but didn’t take the time to listen to her music until the summer. I found I really enjoyed her music, but I absolutely love “you should see me in a crown.” This song has both heavy and soft moments placed perfectly with the lyrics. Thus, its placement is high on my list. 6. “In My Blood” Shawn Mendes – I was quite surprised when I heard this song from Shawn Mendes. I have enjoyed his previous singles, but I absolutely love this one. Mendes’ vocals deliver important, relatable lyrics. He describes the process of overcoming crushing anxiety with music that is both soft and powerful. I knew for a long time that this song would be in my Top 20, so here it finally is. 7. “Happier” Marshmello feat. Bastille – I have been enjoying Marshmello’s latest singles and have always loved Bastille, so I was excited to hear this collaboration and was not disappointed. Bastille’s Dan Smith brings wrenching vocals that help portray the story of loss told through the lyrics. The EDM creates an interesting contrast at times, thus making this a unique song deserving a place in the top half of my list. 8. “Pray for Me” The Weeknd and Kendrick Lamar – Do we all agree Black Panther was an amazing film this year? Can we also agree it had some pretty great music? “Pray for Me” is my personal favorite from the soundtrack. The Weeknd and Kendrick Lamar’s vocals and lyrics match the power of the tribal sounding background. This song has a one-of-a-kind sound that I must include it here. 9. “My My My!” Troye Sivan – Troye Sivan released a fantastic album with Bloom. “My My My!” was the first single and quickly set the tone. This song presents a fun dance beat as it tells about living life fully and loving wholeheartedly without fear. As one of my favorites of the year I had to have in this year’s Top 20. 10. “MANTRA” Bring Me the Horizon – This rock song brings many unique sounds to the eerie lyrics about starting a cult. Yet, the lyrics have a deeper meaning as singer Oli Sykes drew inspiration for the song by comparing a marriage to a two-man cult. The musicality and vocals alone make this alternative anthem close out the first half of my Top 20. 11. “Back to You” Selena Gomez –Selena Gomez released another catchy love song with “Back to You.” The music includes guitar and EDM sounds while Selena provides a range of vocals. This was one of my favorite pop songs this year, so I had to include it in this list. 12. “Head above Water” Avril Lavigne – She’s baaack! This song is quite different for Avril Lavigne, but it’s exactly what we needed to hear from her. Avril shows all her emotions with her vocals in this soft yet very powerful song. This song also has some personal connections for me, so I knew I had to have it in my Top 20. 13. “Without Me” Halsey – One of only two songs Halsey released this year, “Without Me” is a very real song about feeling betrayed after a failed relationship. Its musicality assists in perfectly presenting the songs sorrow and anger. As always, Halsey’s vocals also lift the song to new levels that make it deserving of a spot in this Top 20. 14. “TOOTIMETOOTIMETOOTIME” The 1975 – A Brief Inquiry into Online Relationships was another amazing album released in 2018. The 1975 made important commentary on the current social world which greatly revolves around online lives. “TOOTIMETOOTIMETOOTIME” is one of the most catchy and popular off the album. I knew I needed a 1975 song in this list and after much contemplation, I knew this had to be the one. 15. “Better Now” Post Malone – While Post Malone had other popular singles this year, “Better Now” has some of the most relatable lyrics. He uses the song to portray the feelings after a break up when you’re not over someone and you think they’re not over you. The covers of this song really helped me appreciate this song and even if I may have liked them more, I must credit the original in my 2018 list. 16. “Thunderclouds” Sia, Diplo, and Labrinth (LSD) – I seem to always love anything Sia is involved with. The LSD project is no exception. “Thunderclouds” was the most popular single from the project. That is clearly because of its relatable lyrics on relationships, very catchy beat, and fantastic vocals from Sia and Labrinth. Thus, I added it here. 17. “Might Not Like Me” Brynn Elliot – The first time I heard this on the radio I knew it would be a hit. It’s such a strong female empowerment song. “Might Not Like Me” is about how boys may feel too intimidated by a strong, smart woman. It can show girls everywhere that a breakup can be necessary if the dude just can’t handle your awesomeness. I always love songs like this, so it was a must for this list. 18. “Love Me Not” Whitney Woerz – I first heard a snippet of this song on a Spotify ad. I enjoyed the beat and catchy tune so much I saved the song to my Favorites. “Love Me Not” is a fun song to dance to, but I didn’t understand some of the meaning until watching the music video. The video shows that it’s about not caring if someone likes you or not, but instead just living life to the fullest. This song always got me happy when I heard it, so I made sure to include in my Top 20. 19. “Sick Boy” The Chainsmokers – This is probably my favorite Chainsmokers song ever. It has tones darker than their other radio singles like “Closer” and “Something Just Like This.” They give a political message about the East and West Coasts of America while also touching on effects of social media in the bridge. “Sick Boy” was an excellent song to start off 2018 and it needed to be present here. 20. “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” Mark Ronson feat. Miley Cyrus – Although it was released near the end of the year, this single from Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus is a perfect representation of 2018. The steady beat combined with Miley’s raspy vocals creates a somber song that still makes you want to dance through the heartbreak. Thus, this song concludes my Top 20 Songs of 2018. 21. (Bonus) “The Stigma (Boys Don’t Cry)” As It Is – This song made me question why in the world I had never listened to As It Is before. Now I’m a big fan of all their music. “The Stigma” begins a discussion on gender stereotypes by producing a song that presents softer tones in the beginning that abruptly build to louder, emotional tones. Patty Walters’ vocals are also superb. The whole combination requires me to acknowledge this song as a bonus in my list. 22. (Bonus) “Medication” YUNGBLUD – YUNGBLUD (aka Dominic Harrison) is another artist I found this year and absolutely fell in love with. I made a recommendation on this blog earlier in the year, so you can check that out to read more about why I’m a fan of him. “Medication” is my favorite song from him this year, so I made it my second bonus song. It discusses society’s consistent need to medicate those with mental illness, even if those medications create a false reality and suppressing their true self. 23. (Bonus) “Death of a Hero” Alec Benjamin – Alec Benjamin was the final artist I became a big fan of this year. While his main single is “Let Me Down Slowly”, “Death of a Hero” was the song that made me decide to check out the rest of his songs. I also made a review of him like I did with Yungblud, so you can also check that out. “Death of Hero” tells the story of someone realizing their idol is not as they appear to be. They are flawed like the rest of us, but that means they are not the hero they were imagined to be. This is one of Alec’s many powerful songs, so it is my last bonus song and officially ends my list for 2018.

I also made a Spotify playlist for this Top 20. You can check that out with the link below:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4NiNwD0KAKJ400v6brMNbk

Thanks for reading!