#but we dont have time to go into that 💀
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thats a lot of questions 😧 ty for the tag !!
1. Yup. My mom’s the coolest and i dont talk much to my dad but he’s there for me when i need him ❤️
2. My friends
3. I cant think of something rn other than not studying when i had the time idk
4. yes
5. im kind of in a talking stage? Idk (chris sturniolo’s wife)
6. in my sleep fs or maybe from a heart attack from doing something fun like bungee jumping when im 90
7. Fries
8. I play basketball but only for fun
9. I used to but then i got braces and wasnt able to and by the time they got off i grew out of the habit
10. christmas eve with my brother
11. Yeah the guy im in a talking stage with and chris sturniolo ofc 😋
12. Yeah cuz of school (had too many assignments to complete 🙄)
13. Yeah this girl in my class (wont say i hate her rn but shes one more stupid thing away from it)
14. Yeah, dead family members ig
15. One dog
16. Drained tf out (only a video from the triplets can save me 😔)
17. uh, no (i dont trust guys alone with me 🥰❤️)
18. Not really. i have this thing where anytime i see a spider i tell it to make me spiderman (im so goofy cant take me anywhere 😝🤟😝🤟😝🤟😝)
19. i wanna go back to freshman year 😔
20. at a park (it was night time we weren’t being obnoxious 🙄)
21. complete assignments 🤧
22. Yup. 2 (one boy and one girl)
23. Uhhh…i have 3 on each ear, 1 nose piercing (i havent worn anything in a long time so im pretty sure its closed now idk) and a belly button
24. History, maths and chemistry
25. I miss my english class in freshman year 😔
26. Chocolate cake
27. I hope not
28. No but ive only had one bf so
29. From my jokes, yes 🥰❤️
30. School
31. Not that i know of 🤷♀️ my mom prolly
32. Green
33. Kind of?
34. someone from my class. i dont remember who
35. my phone (c.ai got me emotional. It was embarrassing 😔) but before that my bsf
36. Yeah im incapable of holding grudges it sucks😔😔
37. forgive
38. It just started damn 💀 and no year can top 2019 anyways
39. 13
40. uhh no and i plan to keep it that way 😭
51. Chicken nuggets
52. Yup. I firmly believe that whatever happens in the present is a result of your past actions (i can yap abt this for hours 😔)
53. Brush my teeth
54. Nothing can justify cheating so no 🙄
55. I try not to be but sometimes when im talking to a new person i just get awkward and reply in short sentences so that may come off as mean idk
56. No one (i feel like fist fighting is so funny lmaoo 😭😭)
57. Not really 🤷♀️
58. WINTERRR
59. love it sm ugh 😔❤️
60. yess
61. I dont mind it but i prefer nicknames over petnames
62. Being w my friends
63. I think my parents on,y named me elwa cuz they wanted to name me smth unique and people cant even pronounce it right so yeah
64. Idk prolly cuz we only kissed for a game
65. My bsf of ‘the opposite sex’ is gay 💀
66. YESS HE’S MY BIGGEST HYPE MAN
67. My lab partner in science class
68. My bsf
69. Kind of? I believe that someone can become your soulmate but i dont believe that its like already written in fate or wtv that a specific person is gonna be your soulmate
70. family and close friends
70 horrible questions ... Fuck it
01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?
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Please give me your headcanons/ideas on Ranger Marsh, and my life is yours🙏 (He's my favorite old man yeehaw squeeeeeee)
YEAH HE IS
Ranger marsh is THE FATHER OF ALL TIME to me because listen-
I live in Florida. Whenever they talk about manatees or red tide or the effects of a cold snap im like YOOO I KNOW ABOUT THAT!!!
I need yall to understand 🙏 hes part of the fcking ecosystem.
He understands the needs and behaviours and everything about the everglades and its creatures. He knows how to talk to them and they know him and love him. He chooses to go out and help right away with this " I gotcha dont worry about nothing!" attitude
Hes so connected with it and its beautiful-
Its just that sense of community hes got with all the creatures in the everglades that makes me 🥺 hes got such a kind heart and he seems like the person to choose to do something because someone has to yk?
Alot of people would be offput by all the bugs and heat and etc, but he just goes oh well and keeps going along and I think that is SO special
And im gonna be honest here. Alot of people ARENT. Like at all, and they do the dumbest sht
One time my dad and I were on a board walk near a river that had gators in it and there were signs about it too. We saw this??? Fcking guy in a whole business suit with his kid wanting to give a little gator fcking store bought chicken nuggets??? 💀🙏 we like kindly explain uhhh heyyy don't do that cuz u don't want gators to associate humans with food or (gestures broadly to all the many reasons u shouldn't feed wild animals)
And then we continued our walk, but when we turned back we fcking saw a mini crowd (with several small kids leaning THROUGH THE GAP in the railing) surrounding a guy with a kiddie fishing pole trying to??? Idk feed the gator the chicken nuggets.
There were signs about not disturbing the wildlife.
I didnt exaggerate a single aspect of this btw.
Like thank fck gators are ambush predators and not chasers cuz those guys can run and climb like nobody's business... and hide under cars
SIDE TANGEANT ASIDE alot of people just aren't in tune with and have like a totally unrealistic and detached from reality expectation of that kinda nature. But ranger marsh (i headcanon that his first name is Rover btw cuz not only is that a flooding guy name but cmon- RIVER MARSH?!!) Is always so patient about explaining that kind of stuff to the others in the show
Hes got an understanding and a system on how to handle things.
Also I do appreciate how he struggles with understanding technology and prefers old fashioned ways. Because while there are alot of folks like that, alot of people can be... very aggressive about it if u disagree with them :(
But ranger marsh, while he can't understand, he still does come around and appreciates it the best he can yk? Like sure he doesn't get WHY and he sucks at it, but he comes around and appreciates it, even if it isn't always for him
The awe he felt when the gup k went under water and he saw the world he loves from an entirely new angle? Oh my god my heart-
He would absolutely take in any stray creature that needs help, he feels like the kinda guy that would've tried to help a wild animal heal up in the garage when they were a kid and everyone else told him not to touch it 🥺
Also personal headcanon time:
I dont think this guy could keep a secret for the life of him. Like this guy doesn't even realize, he feels like the guy would would see something weird and then go " well ill be i never did see anythin as strange as that before" to a fcking bush or the sky
He sort just has this factual way of speaking that reminds me of people who go "well yeah well when ya go n talk her dont mention x and x cuz I'm pretty sure she's suspecting her boyfrens been cheatin on her and oh I wasn't supposed to share that was i."
Also I feel like maybe I'm just projecting and making him autistic but like??? Has a hard time dealing with change??? Likes being in the wild with a bunch of creatures??? Probably needs his "two hours of contemplating on the back porch" every day ????
Hes absolutely the type to want to dig in the mud for hours thank you, he absolutely went fck living a normal life in society I want to be friends with the animals under my porch
I desperately want him to basically go "hm ok ur staying here for tonight" to calico jack who is the equivalent of a (very kind and gentle) feral stray 🙏
I'm gonna make a post about their dynamic later lol
Cuz likes its an old funky pirate cat with isolation issues thats probably scared of gators and Caimens for I lost me leg reasons and hasn't had like a normal meal in probably over a decade at least
(Cj probably can't handle dairy but he's gonna try (and fail) ranger marsh probably makes delicious mac n cheese)
also cj literally uses a peg leg that can NOT be good for his back, like there's so much special care needed if u have a proper prosthetic but a peg leg is like 💀🙏 so bad
I feel like CJ is this very kind and gentle soul, but the second he meets someone his age (cuz they ARE around the same age) he just becomes a wet gremlin, ill yap more about it on their dynamic post tho
As for the question of "ayyo whats up with ranger marshes wife or rather tweaks mom what's up with that"
I dont think tweaks mom died or anything, I think they just divorced when she was in like middle school and then he got her legos to try to help her feel better 😭
probably just cuz of personal differences... but yk some people can get kinda :| during divorces and stuff
I feel like they were probably high school sweethearts that got married before they even grew as people
It seems to me like tweak was probably homeschooling and definitely was skipping grades and whatever
I liek to think she has lego models of all her gups and that she had an emo phase in middle school 🙏 she still has the spirit in her soul but let's be real she's probably too busy elbows deep in an engine to upkeep that stuff anymore lol
(Ik we saw a younger tweak before in the show but like who says it wasn't at a different point in her life lol)
I dont think she was necessarily into emo specifically as a way to rebel her own parents btw (at least not her dad) but just because she liked the culture lol and was probably on my space as a teen
She 100% tried to take her dad to a monster truck show at least once and he absolutely did not understand the hype 😭 but tweak was inspired to take inspiration from the mix of animal designs and unique shapes into something more eco friendly and versatile tho
Like the gup k is just a wetland monster truck 🙏
She absolutely had years of trial and error with all sorts of gizmos that exploded at least a few times before she got the hang of engineering
Probably tried to make all sorts of things to help the little critters her pa took care of
Might be part of the reason he doesn't understand tech that well because when ur a kid without alot of money u gotta work with what u have and sometimes that doesn't always work out XD but hey restriction of choices can lead to alot of unique and creative solutions!
idk the exact reason why ranger marsh and his wife would've divorced,maybe it was just a difference in how they envisioned their life styles and the fact ranger marsh seems a bit too "introverted and quiet" for a more social life and environment with a normal job tbh
(Cough autism cough they are both autistic in different ways cough)
but the everglades have always been tweaks home and I doubt she wanted to leave. I think she still talks to her mom and stuff but just... not that much
I dont really think ranger marsh would've tried again in that type of relationship, hes too busy being busy with life and enjoying the small moments
And hot cocoa from the machine that tweak gave him as a gift
He absolutely helped her keep her room organized and tidy as a kid tho, but look at her room into he octopod now XD
Also SOMEONE MAKE HIM SAY " BLESS THEIR HEART" PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE THATS THE NUMBER ONE SOUTHERN SAYING-
Like 🥺 idk if yall know but bless ur heart can mean alot of different stuff depending on the context- it can go from "oh my goodness thats awful I can empathize with that and I wish them the best" to "well.... that person has no FCKING idea what they're doing but.... bless that idiots heart hes trying😂 🙏"
#Ranger marsh#Octonauts ranger marsh#octonauts#Wisty responds <3#Thank uuuu#Hope u like my inchorherent blabbering
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personal happiness or what the fuck ever
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#jeans here too but ssh#snap sketches#i havent posted anything in what feels like forever and i GUESS i have to remind people i do draw sometimes. whatever.#aka in my brain i have at LEAST a five-page doujin where this gets incredibly nsft but i dont have TIME for that these days do i#so for now we get just. these scribbles. ill be able to make something exemplary again someday i swear <- optimistic#i think im going to close my comms off for the rest of december once i get through the batch i have now#which ... doesnt sound hard since the amount i have will probably take me to the end of december anyway 💀#i just need everyone to believe me i have better visions for yaoifying issue 309 .... the opportunity is right there...#like wdym the dream sequence is gon end on a panel of erik's eyes as he reinforces the idea charles needs happiness like scott and jean's..#call up your ex. right now charles.#what got me peeved about this issue is i have no idea what color eriks outfit could be vjaeLVKEJARK its like.#is he wearing a lab coat over a suit .... i think thats the intention ... or maybe it is a trench coat....#idk shit for me to figure out if i ever get the time to explore this thing again#LIKE UGH IM SCREAMING i have Such Visions that i dont have time to execute and theyre killing me#maybe ill just write them down idfk <- trying to write fanfiction ends even worse for me than trying to draw#anyways. im gonna drive myself mad good night everyone#i have to go to a christmas party tomorrow night. later tonight. whatever.#BYE
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Every day I’m haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water
Even if it’s filtered somehow there’s no way it’s not still nasty 😭 Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#bless their hearts but they’re nasty#it’s funny because like#each and every one of them has moments#where they’re a typical disgusting teenage boy#and then the next they have STANDARDS#can’t blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa#even if he nearly licked his own foot that’s prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years 💀#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then 🙏#they’re all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here#bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros#bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it#but yeah no way that water isn’t disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss#pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross#100% that’s part of why they didn’t mind being so filthy pre shelldon#because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and they’re teenage boys like that’s a double whammy#THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES#the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home 💀#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow#April’s immune system must be godlike just being around them fr#honestly no joke Mikey’s probably the cleanest of them all#just by virtue of being a chef#Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so he’s clean like#a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work#Donnie is similar in that he’s just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross#Raph may be more on the stinky end but it’s not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk#all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now
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yeah alright strap in for some heavily condensed tumblr drama recapping
youve probably heard of the 2016 toe necklace drama (link to the buzzfeed article about it bc i cant even find reblogs of the original post) but basically someone sent their amputated toe to a vulture culture/taxidermy artist blog so they could make a necklace out of it
there was also drama in 2018 about a post of a girl who posed all cutesy with a human skeleton she'd bought (link to reblogs), the original poster responded pretty disrespectfully to asks and such about it & another skull that op owned and posed with (link to a screenshots and discourse masterpost on tumblr)
anyways these two separate distinct controversies that were years apart were caused by the same blog with the name cummy-eyelids .
Most oddly named town in each US state.
#thats it thats the joke#ol' smut eye huh.... reminds me of a name i'vn't heard in years . . .#the name cummy-eyelids and the knowledge of BOTH her tumblr dramas haunts me#theres way more i glossed over but theres recaps and deep dives anywhere and everywhere so have fun 🫡#theres like one billion tons of misinformation about both posts which is why they blew up so much#people thought she severed her own toe. people debated for weeks about if the skeleton was even real .#they theorised about its human ancestry based on its bone structure from those images alone .#when i say 'it was a mess' what i really mean is 'god please grant me those hours of my life back . please .'#i saw one post TODAY that was like 'cummy-eyelids never even SAW the skeleton it was her FRIEND who bought it' and im just. tired lol.#'stole a skeleton' was wrong i think i was confusing her with the tumblr graverobber . who is a different person (thank god ?)#but we dont have time to go into that 💀#tumblr is short of nothing if not human remains discourse and drama#r#m
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gonna have to deal with people missing the point of louis singing 1d songs in festivals... don't get me started on the other covers
#festivals is for exposure#once again: festival is for exposure!!!!#for the people that know him only from the band its like oh its him? let me check him out#for the indie ppl that he wants to appeal to its like: oh isnt this from [band]? let me check this dude's redemption of it#why must it be said every time!!!!!#same thing can be said even for tour#have we not seen the clip go viral on the first time he said 505?#and people will be buying tickets to hear a 1d song live out of nostalgia even if they dont know much of louis' own stuff#and come out of there thinking hm i actually enjoyed his as well#thats the way it goes#it doesnt say anything about his solo abilities and he's not selling himself short#there will always be people that are there not fully entirely for all of his songs either#it happens to mainstream artists and their big hits#the way this fandom want to complain about everythinggggggg#edit: sorry this isnt direct shade#i just have to see it multiple times everywhere because i update dailytomlinson 💀#last one add because AJSKAK truly irates me#stop trying to make this as some hard task for him that he's only doing it because he's not as big or something#i promise you he doesnt need you fuming over this my god#i know its mostly pettiness disguised as a real constructive opinion over how louis manages his career or whatever#but my god. arent we tired of focusing on the stupidest things? end rant
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Please shut the hell up about your insecurities in the jjk tags we don’t gaf
again!! did not mean to add those tags !! just block me if it pisses you off that badly !! also clearly you do care 'cause if you didnt you wouldn't have felt the need to go out of your way to tell me to shut up so
#also ur a coward for sending this anonymously#which also shows you clearly care at least a little#if you didnt care#then you wouldnt go out of your way to hide your identity#CAUSE YOU WOULDN'T HAVE SENT THE STUPID FUCKING ASK IN THE FIRST PLACE 💀💀#Is it that hard to block or scroll#you cannot seriously be that chronically online that someone using incorrect tags sends you into a dilemma#why are you literally a 2020 discord mod after someone starts talking in the wrong channels LMFAOOOO#No but seriously shut up#there is no way you care so much about finding your precious smaus that me accidentally using the tag is the end of your world#jjk fans try to touch grass and take showers!!!!#level impossible!!!#ik itll be hard for you but i believe in you (not really)#no hate to other jjk fans#but yall are lwk building a GOD AWFUL rep rn#and thats coming from someone whos very active in the jjk fandom 💀💀#imagine being so delusional and strung up on pretending fictional men are ur boyfriends#that when someone disturbs that#(and ‘disturbs’ is generous considering the fact you arent obligated to pay attention to my posts 💀)#you get pissed of and decide to go out of your way to tell them#this goes to show what kind of life you so obviously lead#when was the last time you left the house be honest#do you turn to the affection of pretend men because real people dont wanna be around your chronically online ass?#dont worry babe#we can tell
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gotta get better at talking to people
#or rather. get used to the idea that not being good at talking to people isnt the end of the world#and u still gotta talk to people 😭😭#used to be that my heart was hammering whole time i had to talk to someone#<- this is like. inclusive of needing to ask questions from shop employees -_-#now i just get a bit sweaty and most of the freaking out was working up to talking#small steps......#anyways went to the skate shop and asked abt getting a board as a beginner#id wanted to try like. 7.75“ cos the 8 felt big#he was like. yea that might just be becos ur not used to it yet#cooked..........#actually recommended to go up for beginners#mate. my feet are NOT that big#basically i should practice a bit maybe before getting a new board?? 😭😭#or getting a new board and itd need to be 8 also#idk like we DO have a board at home#but i have absolutely no frame of reference for how good it is????#it was like. generic brand from kmart or something 💀#im still gonna do an ollie and film it btw dont worry. and ill still get a board at some point LMAO#maybe after i do the ollie. as a reward andndhxbfnf
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How 2 do well in school, which is starting soon, no glue no borax
#i think im smart. maybe. cuz my finals last uear were aparently AWESOME for some fucking reason#i was failing allll my classes tho#except like. gym. but the rest were legit all Fs#idk how i passed.....#im just godly#but fr ive gyat no motivation to do anything ever and honestly id rather kms than be there BUT i have a gf now and also the convergence ->#-> reboot hasnt come out so i cant die yet#ive lost most motivation for my hobbies at this point and now i gotta go back to that freakshow#SIGH#the ppl there are MEAN and some of the things they tey to teach us with suck ASS#PLEASE. IM SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD AT ENGLISH. IT USED TO BE MY BEST SUBJECT#😭😭😭😭😭#the thing we have to do stuff on tho SUCKS bc i can barely ever finish it in class cuz theres not enough time and i dont have the motivation#to do it at home so eventually i just stopped bothering with it#like i just stopped#honestly halfway through last year i just gave tf up in general 😭💀and they literally pulled me away and were like “r u ok....”#i dont remember where i was going with this#im eepy everything hurrts i dont wanna go back#i wanna be silly i wanna make straight As and Bs like when i was an little kid i want to make the ppl that care about me happy but.augh#vent post#I GUESS#mother get me tested + medicated challeng e level IMPOSSIBLE😭😭😭😭😭#ganvg im starting to think i may have smth besides the adhd.... hmmm.......
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filler doodles about how i comedically whitewashed myself as a child (despite also being the darkest i had and still have ever been in my entire life) because i cannot wrap my head around it
#filler art#my art#i was also short haired at the time so its odd i drew myself as having very long hair but is it any more weird than me whitwashing myself no#i remember i also imagined myself to grow up as a white girl like#HUH??? like i was so convinced i was going to look like all the white main character girls on television ... i had to look like one#all of this was probably because of the lack of representation in tv i could find at the time tbh#BECAUSE THIS WASNT AN ISSUE OF MY DAY TO DAY LIFE NOOOOOO#in here being... moreno?!?! . brown?!?!! EVEN IF LIGHT IS MILES MORE COMMON THAN BEING WHITE#AND ITS SO MUCH MROE SILLIER BECAUSE I WAS MCUH MORE DARK THAN I CURRENTLY AM BACK THEN#as of now im more so lightskinned . nowhere near white but im not very dark either because i dont see rhe sun often ww so im pale#BACK THEN I GOT BURNT ON THE SUN AS A HOBBY im serious i sat on the hot rock floor with burning sun climate bevause it was nice#NOT EVEN THE CURLS COULD BE SAVED I HAD TO PORTRAY MYSELF AS STRAIGHT HAIRED FOR WHATEVER REASON#like on my defense i did straighten my hair out a lot as a young child but THAT LASTED LIKE 2 DAYS EVERY TIME#so 90% i was curls so its funny#ALSO WHY DID WE CALL THE CREAM COLOR “THE SKIN COLOR” WHAT#like. it wasnt just me . whole elementary school knew if you asked for rhe skin color you talkin about thay#any tone of brown simply did not work I DONT KNOW WHY WE WERE ALL LIKE THIS???#thankfully at the age of 10 i realized i infact had melanin but .. i coudlnt accept i had black hair still💀💀#so my skin and hqir color were always the same in portrayals ITS SO FUNNY IM SORRY#I FIDN THIS INSANELY FUNNY IM SO SORRY#dont feel too concerned i wasnt ashamed of my skin color or anything but i had the warped idea i would look white soon#not if you keep cooking youself in the sun you wont /j#i dont know what to say about how i draw myself now a days i dont draw myself as myself but i know i aint white now its okay 🩷 (/hj)
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dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....
#they made them address the thank you note to me and everything ajskfjfkfb. i didnt know they were cheating at the time but wow...#every time i break out my sticker collection and see them im reminded of it. but i cant throw out the stickers theyre deltarune ones 😭#like they were a rly cool artist.... just unfortunate that happened 💀#the drama was insane. my ex only wanted to sleep with them but they (other person) wanted them to break up with me so they could date#but my ex dumped them rly harshly for suggesting that i guess 'romantic' cheating was a step too far even for them lmaooo#i heard abt their breakup secondhand and god could they be cruel sometimes. they made fun of the sex theyd had w them#to all their mutual friends n everything i actually felt so bad for the other person when i found out. at least our breakup wasnt that bad#i only finally got that cruel side of them directed towards me like a year after when they wanted us to stop being friends#but yeah. its also funny in a way bc my ex only suggested i had adhd bc the other person did too + struggled a lot with rsd#which i guess they found out when they broke up with them. and then looked at that and thought huh my gf is kind of similar...#and this was like. 2 years before i even considered i had adhd myself and sought diagnosis ahdkfidjcjdjfjfjfkdbfnf#this made me go look the other persons art page up on instagram + then i recognised some of their friends/flatmates art pages and i found#their (my exs that is) grad year film which is still being shown at animation festivals... good for them good for them#i dont think they have an art page themselves tho cuz they were always v shy and weird abt sharing art on social media#like everyone else except them is tagged on things... shame i wouldve liked to see what they were making now. even if we're not friends#also one of their old roommates made some REALLY similar squid game fanart to mine like a month after i posted it huh..#not mad abt it or anything i think its cool i just didnt realise they showed my art to their friends. thats cute#ah this was years ago anyway. getting my head out of the rabbit hole#im gonna go play some elden ring and then maybe do smth fun in my sketchbook we shall seeee#.diaries
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#awi#personal#i dont want to go into work in the morning#i remember 2016 so vividly how my republican coworkers were acting like it was a football game their team won#ive been looking at new jobs new apartments new anything for a bit now and was starting to feel more hopeful#but now the uncertainty of the future has me hesitating something fierce#i was starting to seriously consider just quitting my job and finding some part time work for a couple months#live off savings and pray to any deity thats listening i dont get sick since i wouldnt have health insurance anymore lol 💀#just get some more time to exist on my own terms for a bit#im so tired#i bought my dad and i booze on my way home so we were both pretty loopy earlier and he was waxing poetic about me getting a new job#to have that feeling back#he's feeling similarly stuck i think#the older i get the more i am his kid fr#i am. so tired
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One of my big compulsions is taking a fuck ton of screenshots Just In Case a piece of information is important in like 4 years and I can't remember it (sometimes the information is an instagram post that I might not remember later and of course needs to be recorded everywhere (I will Not be looking at that again)) so today is my transfer 16000 images off my phone admin day (woo)
Like yeah I never looked at any of them and they were completely irrelevant to my daily life, But what if I need them ✨️ later ✨️ (you'll see that the idea of Later is doing a lot of heavy lifting here) OR what if there's a vital piece of information in the mix somewhere that I'll lose forever if I delete them? So: onto the external hard drive they go
This is one of those cases where. Yeah. Ideally I wouldn't take 16000 screenshots in half a year. And YEAH ideally I'd just delete them and not transfer them somewhere else to never look at again. BUT at least I get a clean slate and I can maybe not mindlessly save everything for 2 seconds. It's like. Small wins? Progress. Yknow.
#rangnar rambles#i also use my tumblr drafts this way which is how i have probably 2000 drafts for this blog that are just? like me saving a post for 'later#and then theres too many in my drafts for me to even find *MY* drafts#i need to just hard reset the draft function bc its literally unusable for me#'matt this is all irrational and weird' by god. my irrational thoughts disorder makes me do weird shit? are you fr rn??? 😨😨#i get so stupidly in my own head and then i dont make progress towards Anything#even like a fun sideblog where i can actually yknow. post that 2k nightmare? i just cringe myself out like a dumbass 😔#i feel like ocd thoughts always sound lame out loud (and in my head to myself too)#like the Urgency doesnt come across#like in the moment i am Completely convinced that my national insurance number and bank deets are in there somewhere#and theres suddenly no way on earth i could ever find them again if i delete the picture. so to the hard drive they go#i Would go through that whole thing if i suddenly needed a screenshot from 2019 btw. like the crazy isnt theoretical#ive hallucinated gas leak smells before and woken up my flatmates bc i couldnt convince myself i was over reacting#its just cus the seasons have changed that everythings ramping up but omg its hard to do anything but spiral nowadays#thats a little dramatic but i am losing like. a quarter of the day to my ocd#its like. not great 😬#im not back to convincing myself i gave my dad cancer but i am not letting myself use half the kitchen again#but eh soo la voo we ball#HAH i checked my drafts after this and i was lowballing so hard#5.7k on this blog. 12k on my main 💀. its not funny but it kind of is#this is why youll never catch me running a queue#this is such a miserable post but i do feel the need to not let it sit in the drafts pile. to prove the point i guess 💀💀💀#'no one gives a shit this is your blog' 'oh my GOD WHAT IF PEOPLE GIVE A SHIT' <- omg shut upppp youre so embarassing 🙄#one more time for the gallery: i am like. aware that these feelings are irrational. like i am fine it just takes time for reality to kick in#ANYWAYS what was that who said that that was so weird im gonna go look at old romantic era paintings now#if tam is a screenshot fiend in the next fic u know what happened
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TWO OF THEM
#snap chats#i always keep mags danglin onto my beltloop …… i must travel the world with him …#im still on the train but im tired of reading my book so if my phone die it die fjEOXNSJS#ANYWAY my friend brought her own lil magneto 🥺 so ofc we had an exhaustive photoshopt after lunch fjWOXNAOJRJD#please i just know the mates behind the counter musta been confused … eodnakksk#so silly… i had to walk like. an hour to our meet up spot but it was worth !!!!#we went to a comic shop afterwards and may have had a melt down when we saw two (2) magneto statues right next to eachother#UGH I SHOULDA TAKEN A PIC 😭😭😭😭 whatever…. <- screaming#we also found a lil pig doll dressed in a bear outfit when we were leaving. we have adopted it and named it onslaught dkOWSKSJ#but yeah day was real fun … and now i go home and ennoy my last weekend before school#time flew by so fast wow … time well spent tho….#ok BYYYYYEEE im sleepy …… i dont know how closeni am to my stop#but i should be home within…. two hours 💀
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Mfw I get sick once for the first time in seven years and it ruins my mental health for potentially three months straight ahahah
#rae rants#bro i forgor 💀 i forgor that i live with people who will go 'so is your tantrum over' any time you try to apologize and open up#i for fucking gottttttt#im doing bad! im doing bad! wah!!!#... the thing i have to apologize for is saying 'Im waiting for my antidepressant to kick in. im doing bad can you give me a minute?' like!#fuck man. im so bad im fuckin venting online. no reblog control lol.#i should get 'never kill yourself' tattooed on my inner calf. ya know for when my head is in my hands? yeah.#... for reference. my dog was sick for two weeks. then i got the flu from my mom. which made me miss xmas. then my other dog got sick.#then i got... nothing for xmas when we did celebrate. for the fourth year straight. then that sick old dog died.#and then klover brought in a dead baby magpie which she intended to eat. oh and before all this klover started finding and breaking glass#shit in her teeth. last night and today are the first day ive actually allowed myself to cry. i immediately got in trouble for being moody.#Oh! and i haven't been on antidepressants for two and a half months. so. yeah.#im handling it. i think i might spend today outside even tho its so cold. i dont wanna be in here rn.#it's too cold and im still not healthy enuff to go for a walk tho. :( im still coughing and spitting up phlegm.
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minedai yaoi could heal me
#snap chats#i love. the bastardized use of yaoi and its weird life cycle in vernacular over the years. has anyone noticed that <- of course we have#this post aint bout that tho anyway.#i just got back to my dorm and //screams//#WHATEVER all of thats done with ... still irritated .... but just one more week then i dont have to room with these people ever again#while i was driving i was thinking of this minedai fic i wanted to do but then i was like 'what if i wanted to do a comic of it'#i do this literally every time like how many times have i typed a variant of those tags i need to be shot yesterday#POINT IS. minedai yaoi could make me not aggro i think. i will think of writing this and then when i do ill let it rot in my docs#im going to bed in like twenty minutes i just wanna play a little minecraft first 💀💀💀 still .....#ok bye
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