#but was also procrastinating since summaries are a lot of work lol

[japaneseadventures]

Tsuda Kenjiro - Nichiyoubi no Hatsumimi Gaku 2024.03.10

Highlights/Anecdotes of this episode:

Tsudaken tries to do the narration for his own guest appearance and dies of embarrassment

He blanked out and forgot his lines when he tried to act for the first time in a long while

Clips of his many major and minor TV drama appearances over the years were shown

His role in The Last Man made him trend worldwide on Twitter

Tsuda shared why he started acting and voice acting

He went on a 1-week holiday trip to Prague and got recognized by overseas Jujutsu Kaisen fans 5 times.

Nakajima Kento talked about how he admired Kaiba Seto from Yu-Gi-Oh. He told Tsuda about it when they worked together. On Kento's birthday, Tsuda sent him a personalized voice message, saying one of the most famous lines in Yu-Gi-Oh.

Tsuda played Inui Sadaharu in Prince of Tennis (PoT) and it changed his life dramatically. PoT was at the forefront of the "ikemen" boom at the time, and he could finally quit doing part-time jobs.

Kazama Shunsuke, who voice acted as the main character for Yu-Gi-Oh, talks about how close the two of them were in that series even though they were playing as each other's rivals. They were both newbies to the voice acting industry with no other jobs at the time, so they hung out a lot as they waited for their call time.

Kazama is particularly smug at being aware of Tsuda's charm a lot earlier than most people, and he wants everybody to know that, lol

Tsuda shares how the cast and staff from the TV drama Saiai are really passionate about the drama. Same goes from the staff of Jujutsu Kaisen.

Namikawa Daisuke shares some anecdotes about Tsuda. Sometimes tsuda texts him about eating out together, but then leaves him on read when Namikawa asks when he's free.

Tsuda talks about his latest movie, where he plays as a villain for the first time.

Tsudaken talks about his kids (!!) His daughter in particular is a bit eccentric, just like Tsuda (That's Tsuda and the TV Show host's words not mine lol)

A more detailed summary of the episode under the read more:

On his TV drama/ Movie Discography:

Tsuda talked about experience acting in the hit TV drama Saiai. On his first day filming, he forgot his lines. It's been 12 years since he last played as a recurring character in a TV show, and for his first scene, he had to do a long presentation in front of 30 people. All he could think was that there were a lot of people, and then his mind went blank.

Some notable TV drama appearances of Tsuda:

- Played as a host in Ikebukuro West Gate Park (2000) in his 20s for 21 seconds - A guy hitting on the main character (Inoue Mao) in Hana Yori Dango in his 30s (2005) for 30 seconds ("Ooh, I got more screentime") - A doctor in Jin (2009) for 24 seconds ("Aww, I had less screentime lol.").

In 2023, he trended worldwide on X/Twitter as an actor for his impactful scene in the drama The Last Man. When Tsuda turned up in the second episode, his acting was a popular topic on social media.

He adlibbed in the last scene of Last Man. Came up with 30 versions for that scene, and settled on "Shintaro, are you hungry?" Figured a parent would be worrying about whether his kid is feeling hungry, cold or hot.

On his acting:

Originally was aiming to be an actor, not a voice actor.

When he started acting, he was able to let all his dark emotions out using the lines he had to act out. These were feelings such as "hating people", and "hate towards society". It was the first outlet he found for those feelings, and he found that very fun. He was able to bring out his real self when he acted. Because of that experience, he couldn't give up acting.

Unfortunately, money was tight at the time and his electricity and gas would get cut off. It even came to a point when even his water would get cut off. He kept on failing in auditions, so even if he's been practicing on his acting, he didn't really have a chance to show it to others.

For him, the most painful thing about it all was that he was an absolute nobody. He had no proof that he's actually alive. But he overcame that difficulty because he was obstinate-- He believes that this is where his strength lies. He keeps doing things until he's satisfied with it.

On his voice acting career:

Voice acting was what gave him an opportunity to link with the world of expressing himself.

Says Nanami Kento is a wonderful role to play. That Jujutsu Kaisen's influence is amazing.

During the New Year's holidays, he went on a holiday trip abroad. While he was sightseeing, a foreigner would call out, "Mr. Tsuda?" He said yes, all the while taken aback since he was in Prague. They asked for a photo and a signature. In the one week that he stayed there, it happened 5 times.

When he asked them how they knew him, everyone answered Jujutsu Kaisen. "Nanami, Nanami." He really didn't expect it to be so popular abroad. It made him feel the power of Japanese anime.

While he was struggling with acting, he was invited to an audition for voice acting and he accepted the invitation with no hesitation. At age 25, he debuted as a voice actor for the anime H2.

At age 29 was his fateful encounter with the series Yu-gi-oh Duel Monsters (2000) where he played Kaiba Seto.

Nakajima Kento says his idol in life is Kaiba Seto. It was also thanks to Tsuda's acting that Kento admired Kaiba, and he told Tsuda exactly that when Tsuda did the narration for Kento's movie show. On Kento's 27th birthday, he got a voice message from Tsuda, saying "It's 27-year-old Nakajima Kento's turn! Draw!!" Kento was ecstatic. He thinks Tsuda is really cool.

A year after Yu-Gi-oh, he played Inui Sadaharu from Prince of Tennis. The Ikemen (Hot Guys) boom was rising at the time, and Prince of Tennis was at the forefront of this trend. It changed his life dramatically. He was finally able to quit doing part-time jobs. At around 31 years old. He always felt like he was walking a fine line, so it was a relief to have a stable livelihood.

Anecdotes from Kazama Shunsuke, voice actor of Yugi Moto from Yu-Gi-Oh

Both Tsuda and Kazama Shunsuke, who played the main character of Yu-gi-oh, were newbies at voice acting when they did Yu-gi-oh. Tsuda was still new to voice acting at the time, while Kazama had never done it before. Although they were playing as each other's rivals, they became close since they were both newbies.

They both didn't have any other work to do, so they had a lot of time on their hands. Kazama would contact Tsuda and ask if he came to work early, and Tsuda would reply, "I'm free right now so I'm lurking nearby." And they'd have tea together. We'd talk about what we could do to be good at voice acting like other VAs.

Kazama talked about how worried he was about Tsuda. When he laughs, Tsuda does it in 3 levels of increasing laughter. At times, he'd even do 5 levels, since the animation would also have 5 different clips as the power of his laughter increases. The 3rd level would be his usual laughter, so Kazama thought Tsuda's blood vessels would burst going beyond that lol

Kazama says he's super happy that Tsuda got to have a lot of regular acting and voice acting jobs. But Kazama just wants people to know that he's been aware of Tsuda's charm for more than 20 years now. A lot earlier than most people have lmao.

On what went on behind of the scenes of a popular scene in JJK:

Says there's a particular scene that highlights Nanami. He wondered how he'd do it, since that scene was originally in the manga. The producer told him what the mangaka said was Nanami's feelings during that scene, but Tsuda and the staff are free to play it out as they like. The director also told Tsuda to do it the way Tsuda thinks it should be acted. Leave no regrets. Like in the making of the drama Saiai, Tsuda feels that hit series like Jujutsu Kaisen are made with a lot of love from the staff, and this love is reflected in the tiny details. He believes that viewers could really tell from that.

Anecdotes from Namikawa Daisuke, who he's voice acted with in a number of works

Namikawa Daisuke says Tsuda's acting method is something unique to Tsuda. It can't be learned.

Namikawa describes Tsuda as a sloth with a nice voice. Tsuda: LOL. Say something nicer!

Tsuda would just contact him whenever, going, "I want to eat soon."

Namikawa: I'm not your mom!! When I text back, "When are you available?" He doesn't reply. He probably isn't feeling up to it right then. Staff: How long do you have to wait for a reply? Namikawa: At the latest, he leaves me on read.

In his latest movie My Home Hero, it is Tsuda's first time playing a villain. Said he had fun doing it. He was asked to make the character very quirky, which really pleased him as an actor. Sasaki Kuranosuke would make pleased faces due to the littlest things Tsuda would do, and it really pleases Tsuda in return.

On his family

Tsuda has 2 kids, a daughter in middle school and a son in grade school. It was his first time talking about his children in a show. Says no one ever asked, so he never had an opportunity to talk about it.

During holidays, Tsuda never answer work calls from his manager. He wants his day offs to be dedicated to playing with his children.

Wakako-san was just fangirling over Tsuda this whole episode lol "Ah, so cute!"

Tsuda talks about how his children won't speak with him if they haven't seen each other for a long period of time, and it makes him feel lonely.

His kids watch anime, and some of them are ones he's in. When he mentions this to his children, they're like, "I know." But they never try to talk to him about it. Tsuda: Why??

His kids love Detective Conan, and Tsuda actually is in the latest movie. (The host, Hayashi Osamu, uses this opportunity to flex and share that he's appeared in a Conon work before too LOL)

Tsuda says his daughter is a bit eccentric like him. When he asked her what she'd like for her birthday, she asked for a biwa (musical instrument), leaving him very baffled. In the previous years, she asked for a pocket watch, ship in a bottle, kemari (ball from a sport back in ancient Japan) Tsuda: Huh…

Tsuda says that now that the borders between countries are dissolving thanks to the internet and social media, he wants them to strengthen their identity as a Japanese person who lived in Japan by attending lessons for Nohgaku (a traditional style of Japanese theater).

Says experiencing something is also remembering what's tough. How there's a disparity with your imagination and experience. For example, we all know that getting scalded is hot. But actually getting scalded is hotter than you would have imagined.

Tsuda talked about he wasn't an elite. If anything, acting may be the thing he's worst at. But he believes life has consolation matches. (Meaning, even if you fail once doesn't mean you're completely out of the running) Being an early bloomer isn't everything.

[mxltifxnd0m]

cereal-lized ✫ winchesters

summary: a morning after a rough hunt

pairings: dean winchester x gn! reader, sam winchester x gn! reader, platonic! dean winchester x reader, implied sam winchester x reader

requested: yes/no: by anon! thank you for requesting this, i hope this is what you envisioned :)

words: 745

warnings: no use of 'y/n', smidge of angst, fluff, none really

a/n: thank you again to the anon that requested this! also i couldn't resist having sam and the reader together since they're besties with dean 🤭. also sorry for the bad pun for the title, i couldn't resist lol

𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵

You managed to pull yourself out of bed this morning, detangling yourself from the arms that were wrapped around you. You trudged through the halls of the bunker to get to the kitchen, where you found Dean in his 'dead man' robe, sitting at the table. He was practically slumped over his bowl of cereal, his head in his hand as he chewed slowly, staring at the wall blankly.

The hunt for the three of you was a rough one, not only on your bodies but also on your minds. You never liked going on hunts when they involved kids, and you guys had to deal with changelings. It took you guys a lot longer than it should have to try to find where the mother changeling had the kids, and by the time you guys found and killed the thing, it had fed on over half of the kids it took.

It hit the three of you hard as the drive back to the bunker was dead silent. No music, no conversation. Just the rumblings of the Impala and the low noises of breathing coming from you, Dean, and Sam.

Your sock-clad feet led you to the shelves that held the tableware, and you grabbed a bowl, then looked in the silverware drawer to grab a spoon before sitting across from Dean and pouring cereal and milk into it.

Usually, whoever got up first in the bunker would make breakfast for the three of you, but it was always either you or Dean since Sam would go on his morning runs and come back after you had just finished cooking breakfast. But this morning was different for obvious reasons. Sam didn't go on his morning run, and Dean made cereal instead of the typical eggs, bacon, and toast he would make for the three of you.

Dean made eye contact with you as he chewed his food lazily and nodded at you in acknowledgment.

"Morning." You rasped out before diving into your breakfast. You usually had an appetite in the mornings but you were not feeling it this morning. Regardless, you still need to eat something and cereal was your safest bet.

The two of you ate in comfortable silence, content with just being in each other's presence as your spoons clinked against the porcelain of the bowls the two of you ate out of. You and Dean found solace in each other's company, whether it be in silence or the random conversations the two of you would have when avoiding research for a hunt. Sam would complain when the two of you would procrastinate and tell you two to shut up (even though you saw the slight smile on his face when you and Dean would get into petty arguments).

You had a good rapport with the eldest Winchester, being able to match his stubbornness and sarcastic responses with your quick wit and level-headedness when it came to tense hunts you guys would be working. You eventually broke through his tough exterior and became each other's best friends. He was able to confide in you in ways that he couldn't with his brother.

A couple of minutes had passed before Sam made his way into the kitchen, still in the sweatpants and black t-shirt he wore to bed, and went over to the fridge to grab a water bottle.

"Morning." Sam greeted the two of you as he closed the refrigerator door.

Dean mumbled something that sounded like 'morning,' but you couldn't tell because his mouth was full. You heard Sam bustling about the kitchen behind you before sitting down beside you with a bowl and spoon and planting a kiss on your head as he did.

You smiled at him before going back and eating your cereal slowly. At this point, the cereal was kinda soggy, but you didn't mind.

Dean grunted something, sleep still riddling his features as he shoved his bowl towards Sam, a couple of spoonfuls left in his bowl.

Sam's eyebrows pinched in confusion as he looked at his brother.

"Have the rest. I'm done." Dean said before getting up, his robe swishing behind him as he padded out of the kitchen and down the hall.

You and Sam stared at the doorway that Dean left through, puzzled. You shrugged it off before going back to your now very soggy cereal. Meanwhile, Sam scoffed and shook his head before grabbing the cereal and pouring it into his bowl.

[cherryobx]

Hey!! I saw that you are taking requests (I also want to procrastinate studying, lol), so I thought I would request a Rafe oneshot where maybe he is helping his girlfriend move into her dorm and a bunch of frat guys start hitting on her and asking if she needs help and he gets all territorial and jealous? Just some cute fluff? Please and thank you, lovely!!!

Move-in day || R. C.

summary: Rafe helps you move in to your dorm but becomes territorial when a guy doesn't get the hint.

word count: 1.3k

a/n: i'm not sure i like this one but bare with me i haven't written anything in more then a year so, thank you sm for the request!!! i love how all of you are supporting my procrastination and/or procrastinating yourself haha

warnings: some guy

You unlock the door, revealing your dorm room. It’s very basic and bland but you can’t wait to start decorating it to make it feel more like home and a safe space for you to relax in. There are two single beds on each side of the room. Also two closets and tables for you and your roommate who hadn’t moved in yet. Your roommate was assigned to you by the school since you didn’t have any friends or acquaintances that were also going to this college. You’d much rather share a room with someone you know but it is what it is.

You choose a side of the room and sit on the edge of your new bed, looking around the room and taking everything in. You can’t believe you’re actually here. After all the hard work and applying to many different colleges, you got into your dream school. You’d only dreamed about this place in your head and now you’re physically here.

You then leave the room and on your way outside you dial Rafe who dropped you off and then went to find a good parking spot near the housing. 

“Yeah?” he answers the call.

“Where are you?”

He describes where he parked his car and directs you to him. You already see him from across the parking lot and give him a wave, which he returns with a big smile and a wave of his own.

The trunk of his car is popped open and he’s already stacking boxes into the carts provided by the school.

“How was it?” he asks as soon as you reach him, referring to the room. 

“Pretty okay.” You shrug and grab a few bags from the back seat, slinging them over your shoulders. Then you manage to grab a box of your books as well. It’s heavy but the room is not that far away.

“Are you sure you can carry that much?” he calls after you.

“It’s rude to call your girlfriend weak, Rafe.”

“I’m not calling you weak!” he defends himself.

“Yeah, right,” you laugh. “Third floor, 5th door on the right.”

You leave him unloading the car in the parking lot while you make your way back to the building. On the way to the third floor, you bump into some guys on the staircase. 

“Hey! Need any help with that?” one of them asks, hands already outstretched. Since your shoulders are already hurting because of the weight of the stuff you’re carrying, you accept his help. What were you thinking taking the stairs? The elevator was right there.

He takes the box from your hands and lets out a grunt. “Damn, that’s heavy! What’s in here?” he starts making his way up the stairs and you follow, adjusting the straps of the duffle bags on your shoulders. The dude’s friends follow you two, whispering something unintelligible behind your back but they’re too quiet to make out what they’re actually saying.

“My books.”

The guy chuckles and asks where your room is. You tell him and soon enough you reach the third floor. He pushes open the door leading to the third floor dorms and holds it open for you while you scramble past him to your door. You fish out the key from the pocket of your pants and open the door. 

“You can just put it on the table.” I let the guy into my room while his friends linger in the doorway.

Thanking him, you throw the bags on your bed. He places the box gently on the table and then turns to you. “What’s your name?”

“Y/N.” You give him an awkward but polite smile, hoping he’d get the hint and leave now but he leans against the desk, crossing his arms on his chest instead. He looks like he’s not planning to go anywhere.

“You wanna come to a party tonight, Y/N? Bunch of upperclassmen are throwing a little party for the freshmen. You could be my date.”

You stare at him, eyes wide. “Uhmm, thank you for the invite but no. I have a lot to unpack and-”

“Oh come on!” he interrupts. “We could have fun and get to know each other. And drink.”

“No, thank you. I appreciate your help and all but I think you should go now.”

“Don’t be like that! You haven’t even given me a chance.”

“You will not get a chance either way. I have a boyfriend.” 

“So? You’re in college now, let loose. He doesn’t have to know. ”

Meanwhile Rafe has finally made it to the third floor with the two carts full of your belongings. He pushes them out of the elevator and towards your room. Already from the elevator he can see two guys standing at your door, which he finds very suspicious. He faintly hears the conversation going on in your room and his blood starts to boil. When the two guys standing there notice him arriving, they scurry off and Rafe scoffs before entering your room.

“Know what?”

The guy leaning on your desk is startled and he stands up, not so cocky anymore. “Uhh…”

Rafe now stands between you and the guy whose name you don’t even know. He straightens his back and stares him down with that mean look he has but which he has never used on you. The other guy is obviously intimidated by him since Rafe is basically towering over his shorter frame.

“She said no. She has a boyfriend. So I suggest you leave before I punch you in the face so hard no girl will even look in your direction ever again,” Rafe growls.

“Whatever she’s not worth it anyways.” The guy shrugs and turns to leave. Rafe’s fists are clenched by his side and he looks like he’s about to strike when you place your hand on his back, making him look at you over his shoulder.

“Drop it.” Rafe takes a deep breath and you feel his shoulders relax under your touch.

The guy lets out a scoff as he leaves but Rafe’s eyes remain on you. “Are you okay?” he asks, worry laced in his voice as he turns to face you, hands now on your shoulders.

“I’m fine. He just helped me with my books and he got the wrong idea.”

“A very wrong one at that. I was so close to punching him in his stupid face for even talking to you in the first place.”

You place your hand on his chest, feeling his heart beat under your palm. “You can’t stop every guy from talking to me. You’re not even here most of the time.”

“Watch me.”

“Rafe.”

He rolls his eyes.

“I’m serious. But he was a jerk anyway. I go for non-jerk guys.” Your lips are turned into a slight smirk.

“Do you now?”

“Yeah.”

“Am I not a jerk?” he asks, hands sliding down to your hips, pulling you flush against him.

“Oh, you definitely are, but just not to me.”

“I’d never be a jerk to you. You know that, baby. But you’re mine. I can’t stand the thought of guys like him talking to you.” He lets out a frustrated sigh.

“I know but I can handle myself.”

“I know you do.” But the next time he visits, he hands you a little box which contains a necklace with his name so everyone knows you’re taken.

[ecofinisher]

Ecofinisher's crediting list for the "Ecofinisher 2.0 Sims 4 Game File"

About two months ago I think, I was thinking about wanting to do another save file again on Sims 4, but I didn’t know when exactly. During a procrastination moment I got into with fanfic writing, I took a small break and did other things, got from a work friend a couple of notebooks since she knows I love to write and I wrote down something I dreamt once wondering if it could be turned into a plot…..then as it was actually something for Sims, I thought about writing it down as a family summary. Around that week, I gathered more ideas and noticed down, what I had in mind to do. From an instruction video, I read the many variations people used in their save files and I decided to use the content only from the gallery. Content made by other Simmers. There are a few families out there, that I still created or downloaded from my starter-times in the game, because it wasn’t enough or I didn’t have any family in mind to fit the plot.

Notes:

- This save file contains objects and clothings from the following pack: Get To Work, Cats and Dogs, Werewolves, My first pet (Free/UTB free) and Holiday Celebration (Free/UTB free).

-The following worlds were used in the save file: Willow Creek, Oasis Springs, Newcrest, Magnolia Promenade, Brindelton Bay (1 new lot, the rest remains the same), Moonwood Hill. (1 new family is located there)

-The game should be free from any CC. There’s a possibility, that it could have something I have missed.

- I recently installed MasterController and some things I have fixed with it, rather than manually. *coughs* career.promote-cheats….you know, that way.

Moving on, here is the link, and it's packed inside a ZIP-file with a PDF file of all the buildings I screenshotted straight from the gallery with the original creator's name. The screenshots were too many for this single post only and it would be annoying to make more posts solely for that. The PDF file consists of 30 pages, but most of the sheets are just screenshots and the family that lives in it.

On the rest of this post, I have the crediting list for the households I downloaded from the Gallery. Go under the cut to check the screenshots out.

Link via Sims File Share

Click down here:

Households

The Alto family. The red-marked is the original one from the gallery from user gemz123. The one you'll find in my game has base-game content only. I only have the mentioned packs above and tried to stay closer to the original.

The Alvi-McIrish household. (McIrish are based on the mother-daughter duo from Ts3's Single Moms household and the Alvi are the ones with the single divorcee Dad from Sunset Valley) I had the Alvi's saved a long time ago in my gallery and I couldn't track back the right creator. I assume it was hestiah23. I only remember redesigning their clothes back then. McIrish as seen in the red square was made by gemz123.

From gemz123 I have gotten her parents. As far as I know, the user hasn't made its own version of Blair as far as I know. So my current favorite version of Blair is from this user mentioned in the image. (Oh I also took screenshots to facilitate for everyone, when looking for those versions on the gallery.

Taken from my other save file I shared back in 2023. Here you see hestiah23, the original creator and the clothing were put into owned games to prevent them from being "naked" (Oh and Judy's a scientist, lol I forgot about that)

The Goode and Bad household from Twinbrook. Ah from the last sales I bought Ambitions and played with them. (It was the only family I was familiar with 😂Wish I had got the game earlier)

Where are my former PSP gamers at? Do you all remember Annie Howell, the bar girl? I remembered her existence and had to add her in the game as well, knowing that she was a werewolf in the game and I had the pack as well! TengGong had made a great Sims 4-version of them. If you own said packs, you're definitely going to enjoy having them in your game. I had to go with what I had and follow somehow the PSP design.

I had a different plot for them, but changed at a later point. I was meant to focus on either Kaylynn or Parker, but ended up getting the idea to make Iliana "the main character" Iliana being the workaholic we know suddenly finding herself lost and needing to find her way back to reality. The Langeraks and Zelda are shared separatly, but were made by the same user. Also gemz123. The dog is from the user rnr1975 and is the house dog of Iliana and served as her therapy dog during her low days. I picked a Leonberger, which only exist in the gallery by other users as the game didn't own one in the breeds list.

The Jones-Brown family. Also from Twinbrook. They're not part of the plan, they are homeless. I thought about adding Jenni, because of the summary of the Goode and Bad household.

Yeah, I gave Mortimer parents in the game. They're also from the gallery, just one of the two happens to be dead now. - They also are dressed differently in the game. Very hideous, sadly :/ If you got the packs above, you'll get this look as DolphinSimmer13 made 😍

The Ritchi household. (In other names "The Megamind household)

They were both variations of them alone or together already. I preferred these two versions from two different users and set them together in the game. Roxanne doesn't need a lot of packs and Megamind is base game, so you wouldn't have a problem, when downloading them from the gallery.

The Sekemotos - OK, in the game they live separately. Yumi lives in a smaller house in Newcrest and Leighton is located in Oasis Springs with his toddler Sam. Everyone's favorite "legacy daddy" lives just like in the OG Sims 3 as a single Dad, just he might be interested in someone in this new town. If something is going to happen between them in the future.....it's up to you.

The Ursine household - Like girl, screw Jared Frio and everything, that happened in Sunset Valley. Take your daughter to a new place and raise her on you own. You have seen in life more men and women were doing the same with their kids and it's possible. Also from gemz123 - Simmers, seriously all his Sims 3-inspired Sims look so close to the original. This user so far has impressed me with how detailed the results were.

The Wainwrights - Owning the Get to Work park, they deserved to make an appearance somewhere in the game as well. "Eco, what idea did you even have for them? People barely know them?"

I stuck with the same plot as in Sims 3, just it progressed here 😂 I had read recently, that Oasis Springs is basically Strangetown, so....military, science freaks, weird shit.....why not?

Ok Ignore the name there, I had to remove their original kids from the save file and that was just my "emergency save name" - Just in case I save households during CAS, because you know.....freezes, crashes and mostly at the wrong moment. Luckily nothing has ever happened to me in the past weeks, but you never know. (As an avid fanfic writer I learned to press CTRL-S every 10 seconds to avoid trouble 😭)

They live separately in the game. Thornton had an affair with Jamie, while being married to Morgana. Both women figured it out and broke his heart and became friends. What happened next? Guess, who fulfilled Morgana's deepest desires? 😏

The Mysterious guys! People might look at the bio and wonder.....hmm they seem familiar, others would be.....some weird-ass looking Sims.....then you enter the game and notice one or two other Sims and realize......THOSE ARE FAMOUS SOCCER PLAYERS! I picked the ones, that went into my head first. (Of course, Messi and Ronaldo would be part of it xD Kinda obvious) They're also from different users, so I'm sharing all Sims separately and adding the RL picture of the players.

Yassine Bounou, created by Simmer Ruit43

Based on: Yassine Bounou a.k.a Bono - Morocco's goalkeeper

Erling Haaland, created by ENTjungferer

Based on: Erling Braut Håland - Norwegian Soccer Player

Kylian Mbappé, created by maudhuy

Based on: Kylian Mbappé - French Soccer player

Cristiano Ronaldo, created by maudhuy

Based on: Cristiano Ronaldo - Portuguese Soccer player

Lionel Messi, created by maudhuy

Based on Lionel Messi - An Argentinian Soccer player

Kasper Schmeichel, created by SafiyaStinker

Based on: Kasper Schmeichel - A Danish goalkeeper

[sociallyawkward--fics]

HEY BACK AGAIN. idk how long its been cuz mobile is trash but me n my friend were talking abt how we were in a lot of the same fandom spaces as kids. Sanders sides being one of them. n i was like..... Long shot but do u know sociallyawkward--fics.. n at first they were like no i dont think so.. but then they looked u up n went OH MY GOD YEA??? ill send u a screenshot off anon but i told them we were friends n they said it was like finding out i knew a celebrity LMAO -H (ironic considering theyre prob more popular on ao3 than u😭 they briefly turned back into a 12yo fanboy)

its still so crazy to me ive known u for so long n met him like 3-4 years ago worlds collide ..... Also u can post this though im off anon if u want idc -H

ALSO. since im here. idk if i ever told u my age but when i sent my first ask to u i was probably 11. maybe 10 even. im turning 18 in a couple months now. its hard to bring myself to read some of the asks (ok most of the asks) i sent u over the years bc i was an incredibly anxious and awkward autistic kid. But u always treated me with so much love hahakjs at the time i was rly struggling n had very few friends n AS MUCH AS IT MAKES ME CRINGE TO LOOK BACK ON u were honestly the only older person i could talk to n it rly meant a lot lol. im so much more confident n comfortable in myself than i was all those years ago n ik i dont send u asks nearly as frequently anymore but tbh even if eventually its only once every few years ill always think back on u so fondly n gratefully. Neway i literally hate being sappy so ill shut up here but yeah. Thanks n such -H

ALSO IDK IF UR ACTIVE ON AMY SOCIAL MEDIA RLY?? BUT IF U R I CAN GIVE U SOME OF MY SOCIALS mostly i just tweet abt my day occasionally on twitter but i also have a sideblog where i post art. just thinking that maybe then i wouldnt have to be like 'and heres a quick summary of the past 8 months' n u could check up on me whenever instead of only seeing me when i send asks😭 -H (its also so less formal cuz when i send in asks u Gotta respond whereas if i post 'just ate a kickass burger' u can just. Like it. idk idc either way but lmk ^__^)

-----------------------------------

I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ANSWER THESE FOR MONTHS SINCE I'VE BEEN USING TUMBLR AGAIN AND MY LACK OF OBJECT PERMANENCE HAD ME KEEP FORGETTING I AM SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭

dkjfhkdhf omg that is so wild that you have a friend who also knows about me dkjfhdsf Sanders Sides (back when it was waaaaay smaller of a fandom lol) was the first (and tbh only, really) fandom where i had any real level of "popularity" as a fic writer, and i fed off that high for SO LONG lol -- hearing that people were obsessed with my work, both then and now after the fact, is genuinely so surreal dfkjhdjkfh like. i am just Here, i am just Some Dude who wrote some words that got them weirdly popular at 17-18 dkjsfhdkjfh (also cuz i try to gather all your asks into one post, you continue to remain anonymous just cuz i copy-pasted them into the post in the same order they were received lol)

Dude it is CRAZY that you are almost 18 (or, by the time i am finally managing to answer this with my Bad Brain Powers procrastinating it so long, already 18) -- I looked back and I was 18 when you sent your first ever ask to me dkjfhdf that's so wild. I am so honored that you saw me as an older person you could come and talk to, even if it was just through anonymous tumblr asks for the past 6+ years lol. I always think of you fondly too, and I am so proud of you for the way you've grown up and grown into your confidence

ALSO YOU CAN TOTALLY SEND ME YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA djfdjdsjkf you can absolutely send me any of your socials!!! I know your main blog because you've sent some asks without it (have I ever remembered to follow it??? I meant to but I can't remember, this is also a Brain Forget-y Accidental Procrastination thing), but I would LOVE to see your art sideblog and def feel free to send me your twitter!! I have not opened my twitter in like. 3 months, because i was having Unhealthy Habits so i tucked the app into a pocket out of site and stopped using it for a while, but I am doing better now and would definitely open it back up more often again to see what you were up to

Also!!! You can always feel free to DM me on any of my blogs/sideblogs here on tumblr, too! You don't have to wait to send an ask (though I love receiving asks from you, don't ever feel like you have to stop even if we connect elsewhere!), you can always DM me on any of my blogs (or on any other socials we may exchange, too!)

[rayofsunas]

s/o is half-human, half-cat.

A/n: back to requests for a bit and as of rn requests are closed! they'll be open again when I finish all of them, I currently have 20 to do. ALSO, sorry for this being really late to the anon who requested this, I've been procrastinating + busy. I also hope you don't mind that I did Childe's s/o male and added Scaramouche and Xiao (Fem and Gn respectively). I added a bit of everything so everyone can hopefully read it/feel included (if this doesn't make sense cause I'm dumb, check the pairings lol). I've never written anything like this so I'm so sorry if this makes zero sense ;-; anyways, have a great day everyone! <333

Summary: s/o is half-human, half-cat.

Parings: Childe/Male! Reader, Scaramouche/Fem! Reader, Xiao/Gn! Reader

Warnings: fluff, swearing, nsfw (18+, implied, mating/heat)

Word count: 1.1k

Childe

mannnn, Childe has never seen a boy as attractive as you

EARS, TAIL AND ALL

omg, Childe thinks you're the cutest

like your soft kitty ears are just so cute

and he loves to tease you so he's going to pinch and pull at them a lot

if you're frustrating him and he isn't challenging you to fight (lmao he would) he's going to tug on your ears, because he knows it bothers you, especially if he's doing it roughly

your tail though is a different story

he's so fascinated with all of your cat-like features, but one thing he loves is your tail

it's not too fluffy, but it's fluffy enough that it's still adorable

you have a long tail too, and you wrap it around his

and like a male cat, you're going to mark EVERYTHING

you're still human, yes, but you still have cat-like features and habits

so sometimes, he finds that you'll come up to him and mark him

male cats pee to mark their territory, but you don't do that since you are still human (that's gross ngl), you'll just constantly rub against him, especially up near his neck

your scent is much stronger than a female cats, so it's much more pungent

and guess what? Childe doesn't mind it, he likes the smell. plus, it keeps other hybrids away (not that there's a lot, but you know)

he would mark you too, in his own way

he's not half cat, so he doesn't really leave a scent on you unless it's some type of fragrance he uses

all in all though,

and he has a lot of questions for you too, like how did this happen? are/were your parent's cats too?

tbh, you're going to get a lot of stares, lets be real

and people think you're a freak but he's always there to keep you safe if needed

"Leave my boyfriend alone, asshole, unless you'll face my wrath!" says it teasingly and it comes off sweetly innocent, his usual teasing tone, but he means it deep down

Scaramouche

he thinks you're very weird at first, like wth

why do you have cat ears and is that a tail at your rear end he sees?!?!

he's never seen a girl like you EVER and he's seen so many strange, questionable things

he's never met Diona before, so he just thinks you're odd, but hybrids like yourself these days are more common than he thinks

he also doesn't understand how this was even possible?!?!

like how tf does one even become half-cat, half-human?

nonetheless, he still finds you attractive, like wOw you're hot af

you're still a cat tho, so like I said before you have cat-like traits and such

for example marking your territory and mating

you like to mark him (he says he doesn't like it, but he's a fucking liar and we know this)

when you mark your territory, you lick his face/neck and he genuinely hates this ngl

it's the one thing he can't stand

even during intimate moments

he's like "don't lick me you brat."

but it's only natural, you need to do it

when it comes to mating that's an entirely different story

you're still human, so if you were to fall pregnant, you wouldn't carry a huge litter of kittens like if you were reproducing with a male cat hybrid

so, you would probably only have one baby at a time (the most being two; twins) but the second one is unlikely

you kind of miss the whole multiple children and big litter thing :(

Scaramouche's glad though, because he doesn't like children one bit

he's glad and doesn't hide it, big-mouthed bitch-

also, you go into heat during random seasons which kinda SUCKS for him

like, you wanna pounce him a lot when that happens whew chill

his favorite feature of yours is your ears, never admits it, he's a secret lover but he knows that you like them scratched

If you leave me alone while I do my work, I'll consider scratching your ears, hmm? How does that sound?

you're pestering him, he'll use the "I'll scratch/won't scratch your ears" card, and you will act accordingly

and you know what?

you're his weirdo, but if anyone else calls you that, he's taking it as an insult and disposing killing them immediately

no one gets to call you weird, except him

he's a bully but I love him

Xiao

pretty boy is confused on how you became to be a cat-human mix, but he doesn't mind as much as you'd think

if you're afraid he'd be indifferent towards you, trust me he's not

sure he thinks you're peculiar, but you're unique as well, more unique than any other human he's come across

and it doesn't change his love for you

plus, he thinks you're so cute :)

your ears are an added bonus that contributes to the cuteness

so fluffy, and soft and AAJDDBEHI

he blushes every time he lays his eyes on you, 'cause you're just that cute

he's going to refer to you as his "cute little neko" omg so cuteeee

he doesn't understand your biological nature, but he'll definitely try too

like if you mate, or are in heat, etc. he's trying his best to grasp those concepts

he's already touch starved so good luck (he's trying for the one-hundredth time!)

but if you explain everything to him, he'll get the idea(s) quickly

and he's not going to judge you at all. I feel like this goes against his characteristics because let's be real, he's a small judgy bb boy adepti and I feel like he already has assumptions about people/motives so yeah ANYWAYS

if you love your tail played with he'll often play with your tail lol, there's not much to say or deny about this

he will do it if asked, he'll do it without being asked, he just likes playing with your tail

he's not going to openly admit how cute he thinks you are or be so open about it that everyone knows how he feels about you, but you know and that's fine. that's all that matters to you

he will not tolerate people making fun of you, not at all

"what does their appearance have to do with you, small fry?"

like don't try to make fun of his s/o, he's not having none of it

he'll protect you to the ends of time ALWAYS

3.15.21, rayofsunas

[ratsoh-writes]

I totally forgot about this!! ugh

Summary: I consider myself a person who is both childish and can be a totally level headed adult at the same time. I am that extrovert person who has social skills but somethimes lacks self confidence and has problems with being assertive, which, btw, I am working on that. I can be, to surprise to no one in the discord, very dirty minded from time to time and I also crack very veeeeery bad jokes, I do that more when I am with my family or very closest friends. Speaking of friendship, I like to have a very little social circle, I struggle to remember that I have to initiate conversations and keep talking to my friends since the pandemic started, but I am getting better at that now. I also forgive easily and don't hold grudges very long (my record is two days lol), and I don't mind lending a hand when I can, as long as I can do it, I will. Standing up for myself is something that I am working on, and I am getting better at it :)

When it comes to negative aspects of myself, I would say my procrastination, that has cost me many good grades, I also struggle to remember important dates and events, keeping a rutine is another thing that is hard for me. I normaly process negative emotion very quickly except when is frustration, I used to self harm myself when I was frustrated, now I just... cry. Managing my time is something I am not good at, also.

Hobbies: Watching movies, cartoons and some series. I like baking chocomilk cookies (only those type of cookies). I am one of those people that watches a little bit of everything, science chanels, funy animal videos, ASMR, how to make xyz thing. I also like to draw and read (I want to make a comic, but again, procrastination)

Pet peeves: Not many things bother me, I guess... not closing the door when the ac is on, no taking a no for an asnwer, not respecting boundaries

Deal breakers: Lack of comunication, not respecting boundaries, people who act like jerks to retail workers, chidren, babies, animals and the elderl, lack of respect for things people enjoy doing and do no harm to others or the person enjoying it. People who refuse to change their bad behavior and make it everyone else's problem, people who cheat on relationships (I can forgive cheating once and being sorry about it, but if they cheat again, then is over)

My values: Family, responsability, self love

Optional: I dunno, I have four turtles, so, it would be nice to have someone that wants to help me raise them.

Oh I have just the guy!

I’m matching you with….

Basil! (Horrorswap papyrus)

What attracts basil to you is your down to earth personality. You’re practical, social, and all around pleasant to be with. He sees a safe barrier in you and feels like he can step out of his shell more with you by his side. On the other hand, you also aren’t afraid to be silly too. It’s endearing.

One thing about basil is that when he’s dating someone, he is verbal. It’s just with new people that he struggles to speak so much. He’s not the loudest monster, but he certainly isn’t unopinionated. He has his own views and isn’t afraid to voice it to his SO

Basil likes animals a whole lot (except deer) and will totally be happy to help with the turtles. Or adopt a few more animals to go with. Maybe some fish and bunnies. Oh! How about a dog? No cats though. He’s allergic

A fun fact about basil; he’s not on the virgin squad, so while he’s easy to fluster in public, at home he can flirt back just fine as long as it’s just you two ;). He’s been there and has some experience with that

[shoutaaizawas]

hii :) can i request shoto with either a college au or fake dating au with the prompt “kiss me again” FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF (nfsw if it flows and ONLY if you want) please

thank you for the request! i always forget how much i like writing todoroki. im sorry but i don’t do nsfw but please take my offering of a kissing scene haha

↳ todoroki shoto x reader → ❝all-nighter❞

event: au!prompts summary: you never expected to become friends with shoto todoroki but when you need to share a book for a project due in the morning you end up bonding. word count: 1,939 tags/warnings: fluff, incident with a creepy guy at a party, comfort, first kiss a/n: i don’t know what college is like bear with me. thanks to @lilli-chae for the college insight. also im giving myself a reward for writing and posting before ten at night lol

Todoroki Shoto was the last person you ever expected to befriend. He was a rich boy from a rich family and those were people you usually tried to steer clear of. He was always silent, if someone asked you what he sounded like you wouldn’t be able to answer them. And he always stared, it wasn’t in a creepy way like some guys but it still unsettled you. You had a few classes with him but had only heard a few words from him.

The first time you ran into him he was lost on campus. It was oddly endearing, the sight of him standing there looking around confused. You asked him where he was going and it happened to be the same class as you. He hadn’t said much except for a ‘thank you’ once you reached the class.

It wasn’t until one night at the library that you started to see him differently. You had a project due the next day. Had you received it weeks ago? Yes, but in your defense, you had a lot of other projects. Okay, maybe you had procrastinated too much. It was late and you needed a specific textbook for the assignment. With your ice coffee in hand, you made your way to the library ready to pull an all-nighter.

As you reached for the book you were already so exhausted you hadn’t realized that someone else was reaching for it at the same time.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” You said looking up only to see Todoroki.

“Sorry.” He said, looking sheepish.

“I’ll grab another copy-” As you looked at the shelf you realized there was only one. “Oh.”

“My project is due tomorrow, otherwise I would offer to use it after you.” He said.

“Mine too.” You said. “We could share it if you don’t mind.”

“That seems like the best option.” He agreed.

The two of you set up at a table big enough for both of you to spread out. It turns out you had the same topic for the same class.

“So do you procrastinate a lot too?” You said trying to break the ice with some humor.

“Not normally.” He said but didn’t elaborate.

“I wish I could say the same but this happens to me more than I’d like to admit.” You said. “You can use it first, I have to get it started before I need the information.”

Shoto nodded and took the book before getting to work.

It was surprising how likable Shoto was once he opened up. He was a bit stiff and awkward but he was really funny and very considerate. You felt bad judging him on his family status. He was nothing like the rich brats you had encountered in the past.

The two of you would take breaks, you would offer him snacks, and most likely due to the sleep exhaustion, you shared a lot of personal stories. His family was something else. The more you got to know him all the pieces of who he was fit together.

The last thing you expected was to wake up with your head on his shoulder in the library the next morning.

“Shoto.” You said nudging him awake. You looked at your phone, you had less than ten minutes to get to class for your presentations. “Wake up we have to hurry.” You said.

Shoto’s different colored eyes opened and looked at you in confusion before he realizes where he was.

The two of you quickly scrambled to pick up all of your stuff and run to class. Thankfully everything had been pretty much done before you fell asleep but you were upset you wouldn’t be able to grab a coffee to wake you up before class.

Since that night you considered Shoto a friend. You would study together sometimes and grab a coffee or lunch between classes. You found yourself confiding in him and he did the same with you.

“When did you and our school’s prettiest boy become best friends?” Your friend Mina asked.

“I think best friend is a bit strong, we just barely started hanging out.” You said.

“Well, best friend was me going easy on the teasing. The real question is when did you capture his icy heart?” Mina teased.

“Wow, okay. There has been no capturing of icy hearts.” You defended as your face heated up. Sure, Shoto was handsome and you liked his personality a lot but that didn’t mean you had a crush on him and you knew there was no way he would have a crush on you.

“Have you seen the way he looks at you?” She questioned.

“Yeah, he looks at me like he does everyone else.” You said.

“If that’s what you want to tell yourself,” Mina said throwing her hands up.

“It is what I’ll be telling myself.”

You did your best to push Mina’s words away but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t try to sneak glances at the way Shoto looked at you. Was his gaze softer when he looked at you? It had to just be your mind making it up.

It was a Friday night and that meant parties. Normally you were more of a stay at home and play video games and eat snacks kind of person but your friends wanted to go out and it had been a while so you agreed.

You ended up at a party on campus, it felt like almost everyone from school was there. You found yourself looking for one person in particular but you couldn’t spot him. Your heart sank a little bit, one of your motivations for going out was the hope that you would see Shoto.

You hadn’t meant to drink that much, you really didn’t have that many drinks but your tolerance wasn’t the greatest. You were having a good time, dancing with your friends. That was until some guy grabbed at you. Instinctually you hit him across the face gaining most people’s attention.

“Did he touch you?” A familiar voice said, your classmate Bakugou stood at your side in an instant with an intimidating glare. He was a bit over the top but underneath it all, he was a nice guy. Mina hung out with his group a lot and you had tagged along at times.

“Yeah.” You nodded. You didn’t have to say another word before Bakugou was dragging him out of the party, his friends Kirishima, Denki, and Sero following along. Mina rushed to your side pulling you out of the party in the opposite direction.

“Are you good?” She asked.

It was nice, the cool air of the night. Your head had been spinning but the ordeal had sobered you up a lot.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You told her.

“What happened?” A concerned voice interrupted. Shoto approached with concern on his face.

Mina explained what had happened and you saw an anger in Shoto you hadn’t seen before. He moved to the direction he assumed Bakugou had taken the man but you grabbed his arm.

“Can you get me out of here?” You asked him. You didn’t want him getting involved, this had been bad enough. You just wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened.

“Of course.” He said before looking to Mina. She nodded and Shoto placed his had between your shoulder blades and guided you away. “Are you hungry?”

“I could eat.” You answered.

The two of you ended up in a 24/7 diner not too far away. Sitting down in a booth under the fluorescent lights you already felt better just being in Shoto’s presence.

It was quiet. You ordered water and chicken strips. You weren’t sure what to say, you didn’t want to talk about what had happened and Shoto seemed upset.

“I should have been there sooner.” He finally said. “My father called me, held me up.”

Was he blaming himself for not being there?

“Shoto, it’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault. I’m just happy that I got to see you tonight and to be honest hanging out here is a lot better than at that loud house.”

Shoto sighed but his expression softened.

“I’m glad I’m getting to spend time with you too.” He said.

After that the mood was more relaxed, you talked about different things and laughed at Shoto’s jokes. Once you were done eating Shoto paid for your food, refusing to let you do so before he walked you back to the dorm you shared with Mina.  

“Do you want to stay for a bit?” You asked.

“Aren’t you tired?” He asked.

“I don’t want to be alone.” You admitted quietly.

Shoto walked in without a word. You sat on your bed opening up your laptop putting on something to watch before placing it on the table beside your bed. Shoto hesitantly joined you, sitting beside you leaving some space.

In retrospect you probably had a little leftover liquid courage from your drinks earlier when you scooted over closer to him, your leg pressed against his. Or maybe you just needed the comfort of having someone you trust close.

It was nice. The sound of Shoto’s soft breathes, the warmth that came from him, the way his arm brushed against yours. It was all comforting and helped the tenseness in your body melt away.

Before you could stop yourself you rested your head against his shoulder, you tensed for a moment waiting for a reaction but Shoto said nothing. A few moments later you were shocked when he took your hand in his softly. You couldn’t stop yourself from looking up at him. His soft gaze was already on you.

It felt unavoidable, unstoppable, the need to lean up and press your lips against his. At that moment you didn’t think of any consequences the action could have. It just felt right. Shoto didn’t pull back, rather he leaned forward meeting you halfway. His right hand cupped your cheek, you felt so small in his grip. His left hand moved to your waist pulling you closer.

After a moment you pulled back to take a breath.

“Kiss me again,” Shoto said. You smiled at him and leaned in again. You adjusted yourself so you could wrap your arms around him, holding him close. It felt unreal. How could things change so quickly in one moment? In one second Shoto was your friend who you may or may not have a crush on and in the next you were kissing him wondering how you could ever lie to yourself.

How could you not like Shoto? He was so good to you, so interesting in every way. Every day your thoughts drifted to him whether you tried to stop them or not. You couldn’t get him out of your head. When you saw a cute dog you thought ‘I bet Shoto would like to see this dog.’ When you ate at a new place you thought ‘I think Shoto would like the food here.’

How had you convinced yourself you didn’t like him?

“I really like you.” You said pulling back again but keeping your hold on each other.

“I really like you too.” He whispered against your lips, looking deeply into your eyes. “Go on a date with me. Please.”

“How can I say no?” You smiled before kissing him again.

“Hey, how are you doing?” Mina’s voice filled your dorm room as the door opened. You and Shoto froze as Mina stared. “Nevermind, looks like you’re doing great.” She said before shutting the door and leaving.

“I’m never gonna hear the end of it from her.” You sighed.

[renjunfromthestars]

more than

Pairing: Mark + reader, Bestfriend! Mark, Childhood friend!Mark

Genre: Fluff, angst, honestly a little bit of crack LOL

Song recs: Best friend + Untitled + Waiting Room (Rex Orange County), Sofia (Clario)

Warnings: Mild swearing and mentions of alcohol

Word Count: 7.0k (my longest fic yet, wow!)

Summary: You’ve known Mark for all your life, and it only takes one drunken night (plus a little intervention with Haehcan) to think that you wouldn’t mind getting to know him a little better...

Notes: The fact that I actually had the patience to sit down and to write something above 3k words,,,,absolutely astounding, amazing, unique, never been seen before…. Mark is a little awk and always works so hard (poor bby), so imagining him as a super stressed pre-med major and oblivious best friend absolutely wrecks me thank you goodbye

----

When you first meet Mark, you’re eight years old, and it’s at church. He’s dressed in his Sunday best: a light blue button up, khakis, and shiny dress shoes. He looks stiff as your mother introduces you two, with his shirt buttoned all the way to the collar.

It’s not that you dislike him, but you think he might dislike you, with the way he avoids eye contact, eyes tracing the floor, your shoes—anywhere but your face.

You see panic flash through his eyes when his mom gently pushes him towards you, telling him to take you inside and reserve a spot in the pews while she catches up with your mom. 

He shuffles awkwardly, and wordlessly, you follow him into the building.

The pews are almost empty, with the bulk of them being filled in the front by the old people that usually have nothing better to do on their Sunday mornings. Although your local church is on the smaller side, it feels unusually large with rows of empty pews, almost eerie. You shudder at shadows the walls make with the stained glass, and hurry to your usual spot towards the middle.

If Mark notices your apprehension, he doesn’t say anything. He’s oblivious, actually, not noticing your absence until he’s almost at the end of the rows. When you see him stop and search for you frantically, you stifle a laugh. 

He eventually finds you, and after shuffling awkwardly between the pews, makes his way to you. 

“This is kinda far, isn’t it?” he murmurs.

“Huh?”

“I mean,” he stammers. “I usually sit closer to the front. ”

You peer at him from the side. “You actually want to pay attention?”

He scratches the back of his head. “Well yeah, isn’t that the point?”

“I guess,” you say, looking at the ceiling. With the sprawling arches and patterns, the designs are pretty, you think. 

“You should at least try, it’s kinda interesting,” when you turn your head to look at him he turns away. “Only if you want to, of course.” he adds, fidgeting with his hands.

When you tell him that maybe you will, you see him crack a small smile.

It becomes a routine, almost every Sunday, with you and Mark sitting next to each other.  Whether it’s closer to the front or the back, it’s a whole debate. You usually give in, because when you walk in, Mark is already waiting for you in the front. 

….

“Do you still go to Church?”

You’re laying on a green bean bag in Mark’s dorm room, procrastinating on the midterm paper you were supposed to get started on, well, a week ago. 

You think for a second, hand raised to rub your chin, just to tease him. “What’s church?”

“C'mon dude, are you serious?”

“Barely,” you say, standing up to move to sit on his bed. “You should really get a new bean bag, it’s kinda deflated.”

Mark ignoring you, reaches over from his desk to fluff up the bean bag. “It’s because you sit on it so much.” 

“Are you calling me fat?” and before he can defend himself you finally answer him, “I stopped going in like, middle school. It would be hard even if I wanted to, to find a whole new congregation, and I’m just busy. Also, it’s so boring, I could cry.”

Mark perks up. “Not if you go with me.”

You groan dramatically, and Mark chuckles. 

“Good to know that you haven’t changed since you were eight.”

It’s just your view on church, that hasn’t changed since you were eight. First thing things first, you were 19 now, going on twenty. You’re in University now, your second year. It’s been a blur assignments, partying, coffee and term papers- you don’t have time to think about anything else right now. Except maybe actually starting your paper but-

Mark interrupts you midthought, breaking the silence. “Are you still with that guy?”

“Huh? Who? Yuta?”

“Yeah,” Mark responds sheepishly, avoiding eye contact.

You roll your eyes. “No, we haven’t been together for a while. It wasn’t that important so I forgot to tell you.”

You can tell he's surprised about how unusually calm you are for talking about your first serious breakup, but he doesn’t say anything, instead just scratching the back of his head awkwardly in typical Mark fashion. “He was an asshole anyway,” Mark murmurs.

“What did you say?” you ask, acting shocked. “Mark Lee? Talking shit?”

Mark, embarrassed, refuses to repeat it. 

“I’m just saying, he wasn’t the right person for you.” he protests.

“As opposed to who? God himself?”

“I can think of a few,” he sighs, but you aren’t paying attention, instead laughing your ass off on his bed.

“You’re insufferable,” he says, standing up to open the door. “C’mon let’s go, I’m hungry. I know you’re not starting that paper anytime soon.”

…

It’s a routine, seeing Mark on Monday afternoons for lunch. Not Friday, because you were busy getting wasted, and consequently not Saturday, because you were too hungover. Not Sunday, because Mark had church, and you, well, were busy praying to God that you would be able to finish all the work you’d neglected over the weekend as a result. 

“I still don’t understand why you choose the worst day of the week for this,”  you say over your Kale caesar salad, pushing the leaves around aggressively. The University had a lot of healthy options, which you were grateful for. Grateful for you were not, were for the student loans you had to pay off every month, the exorbitant amount you partially owed to all the local and expensive organic produce the meal plan featured for the sake of being sustainable and health conscious.You could really give a rat’s ass about whether your salad was organic or not; if your weekends said anything about you, no amount of kale could help you (or your liver).

“It wasn’t really up to me,” Mark points out. “Maybe if you weren’t too busy being-”

“Ta ta ta,” you tsk, waving a finger around. “I, unlike you, actually have a social life.”

Mark frowns. “I have a social life.” 

Mark definitely had a social life. He was popular, even. As popular as you can be, being a preoccupied Pre-med with perfect grades. Mark is likeable. It’s not like he doesn’t have the opportunity to go on weekends if wanted to, he just chooses not to, deciding to slave away at biological functions, orbitals, and lab results instead. Even now, as he takes his glasses off to clean them, you notice the imprint they leave on his face from how long they’ve been sitting on his face, and doesn’t take you long to find the dark circles that grace the skin under his eyes: he’s exhausted.

You frown too. “You should really get out more Mark. You seem stressed.”

Mark gives you a small smile after putting his glasses back on, and then resumes typing on his laptop. “I don’t know how going out would make me less stressed,” he says, distracted. “I would only be more stressed, knowing the work I have to do.”

“Yeah, but you're pretty organized.” You point your fork at him accusingly, kale falling to the side. “Don’t you usually finish things early too?”

“Yeah, I do.” he admits,  and before you can press onwards you’re interrupted by a girl you recognize to be his lab partner.

Goggles in hand, you can see the marks they leave around her eye area, but she’s somehow still annoyingly beautiful, with her glossy straight hair and long eyelashes, but that’s not why you dislike her. She might be the most stuck up girl you’ve ever met. 

“Did you do the calculations yet?” she says, turning to Mark. ignoring you. It’s only when you cough in your seat that she turns to you. “And hello, (y/n).” An afterthought.

“Hello Yebin,” You give her a wry smile. “How's the lab?”

“The usual.” she glances at Mark, who seems to be doing some finishing touches on said calculations. “How’s Chem 2?”

Boy, does she really grind your gears. 

“It was fine, I actually placed out because I took it in high school.” Not to mention, it was a class for freshmen, and you were in fact, now a sophomore. 

Before she can say anything back, Mark claps his hands in celebration. “Done! Sorry it took me so long, I just had to double check some things.”

“It’s no problem,” and with the way her voice drips with a sickly sweetness, you want to gag. It’s so painfully obvious. “Are you still down for tomorrow?”

Poor Mark, always oblivious, stops typing on his laptop and looks up in confusion.  “Huh?”

You silently laugh at the expression Yebin makes when she realizes Mark has no idea what she’s talking about. “For our study session? The MCAT is just months away.”she reminds him.

Mark remembers. “Oh yeah, about that, I was thinking we could also invite-”

“Great!” she chirps, “See you tomorrow!” and with a flash of her white lab coat, she's gone. 

Mark scratches the back of his head. “I guess she had somewhere to be.”

You roll your eyes for what it seems like the 100th time this week, anymore and they might be permanently stuck to the back of your head. “She definitely likes you.”

“Who? Yebin? No way.” 

“Yes, Yebin, and yes way.” You fling a walnut from your salad over to his side, and he cringes.

“What is your problem?” he grumbles, and resumes typing on his laptop.

You drop the subject, because you know any talk on girls is completely lost on him. As you set aside your salad, you peer over at Mark, palm supporting your face. He’s focused, eyebrows slightly furrowed, with his lips mouthing over silently whatever science journal he was reading on his computer screen.

Mark has always been good looking, you think. You don’t know why you’ve never really noticed it before. His nose bridge gently slopes over his face, and his jawline is sharp, having lost his baby cheeks years ago. He works out often too, although he barely talks about it (maybe out of fear you’d tease him for being a gym bro). And with the way he’s so adorably awkward,  It’s no surprise really, that every girl friend that you’ve met of his seems to be completely smitten. 

Shaking your head, you snap out of it. It’s dangerous to think of Mark that way, you think. You’ve known him too long.

“My problem? I think you’re the one with the problem here. I’m surprised your hair isn't completely gray by now.”

Mark ignores you, probably mad at the fact you tried to start world food war three with him with a walnut.

“Hey.” you flick at his forehead to get his attention, and he flinches. 

“There’s a party this weekend at Johnny’s fraternity, you should come.” Johnny, being both your long time mutual friend (who’s demeanor is way too nice to fit the stereotypical frat boy image, really) who has since stopped asking Mark out of respect for his “med school grind”. 

“I’m already planning on it,” he responds, and you’re surprised. 

“Since when do you actually accept party invitations?”

“Since yesterday, because I’m tired of Haechan bothering me about it.”

You silently cheer, of course, you expect nothing else from Haechan.

…

“I never knew it was so hard to get booze.”

“It’s not hard if you’re 21.”

Scoffing, you turn your head to face the boy across from you. As if he can feel the burn of your gaze on his forehead, Haechan stops typing on his Macbook and lifts his eyes to meet yours. 

“No shit Sherlock, but last time I checked, we both weren’t 21.”

The sun had set a half an hour ago, and despite having spent the whole afternoon together, you and Haechan have had yet to come up with a way to secure the drinks you promised your friends for tonight’s pregame. With both of you being certified schemers representing your respective friends, you guess it wasn’t that big of surprise that the responsibility was left on both your shoulders. It beat scavenging alone, and spending time with Haechan wasn’t so bad either, when you two weren’t trying to kill each other. 

It was already late, and Haechan had deemed Ubering to the nearest packer store that sold Soju (the sweet sweet liquid of choice) was too much work. You on the other hand, had dismissed that option for a completely different reason. The issue in question was the flimsy, borderline pathetic excuse for a fake ID Haechan planned to use at the packer store. 

“Hey it works!” he protested. “You just act like you’re already legal and they don’t even card you. Easy.”

You roll your eyes as Haechan theatrically reenacts his last trip to the packer store.

“I asked him how he was doing, and he told me school sucks. I say to him, ‘Tell me about it,  thank god this is my last year!” and as if to emphasize his next point, he flicks his wrist in the air, ID snuggled between his index and middle finger. “And I was on my way. No issue at all.”

“That’s because he didn’t even see your fake I.D stupid. He would’ve called you out on your bullshit in an instant.”

Out of all the different options available, you could not fathom why he chose his fake ID to show that from all the places in this world, he was from freaking Hong Kong. There were fifty states to choose from, other English speaking countries, and he chose to pose as an  international student on a student visa. He could most definitely look the part, but after looking at the ID he proudly slaps on the common room lounge desk, you deadpan. The yellowish tint to the card was way too suspicious to be taken seriously.

“I wish we could just ask Mark,” you sigh, and Haechan looks at you like you’re stupid.

“He’s 20, ya dimwit.”

“I know, that’s why I said I wish. You have serious hearing problems.”

Haechan stops typing on his laptop to shoot you an especially heated glare, and you’re reminded again why he’s #2 on your fight list, right above Yebin. First place was taken by the girl you almost actually fought at that one University party a town over, wherever she is you hope she’s having a terrible day.

“If it were not for the rules of this land, you’d be dead right now Haechan.” 

Haechan places his head in his palms, and flutters his eyelashes disgustingly. 

“But you love me.”

“Yes, as much as Mark loves social events. Speaking of Mark, how on earth did you get him to leave his cave?”

“It didn’t take much,” and before you can call him out for lying, he shushes you.

“Okay, maybe a few days of nonstop begging.” Haechan says as his eyes dart across the laptop screen. You raise your eyebrow. “And I might have threatened to release pictures from the photoshoot his mom made him take when he was younger.”

“I expected nothing less from your evil, evil, mind.”

He scoffs. “Hardly. Just resourceful.”

Resourceful he is, because Haechan is the one who ends up finding a plug for the alcohol that night. 

…

A can of four loko, a bottle of soju, and a few shots later, you should be hammered, wasted even. But after 14 months, 2 weeks, and 5 days into college, your tolerance is pretty high, so you’re really just plain drunk. Even so, you’re a little messy (no surprise). You’re not in a state to be trusted with any errands, so you don’t understand why Haechan asks you to pick up Mark along the way to Johnny’s fraternity. 

“Why do I have to do it?” you whine, putting your hand over your forehead, and Haechan only laughs at your dramatic display of despair. 

“Because Johnny messaged me that Mark isn’t there, and there’s no way in hell I’m letting him flake on me this time. ”

You point a finger at him, and he stifles a snort when you’re off by a couple inches. “Letting him flake on me, me, me as in you! It’s not my problem.”

But there’s no use in arguing with Haechan, and you know it. That’s why you find yourself stomping your way up the second floor of Mark’s dormitory like you’re in elementary school again, having just been scolded by your mom and being forced back into your room.

You knock at his door impatiently, and it feels like forever until you hear some shuffling, and see the door knob twist open. To be honest, it’s probably just a few seconds, but time is different when you’re intoxicated.

Before you even see him, it smells faintly of  shampoo and detergent, so you’re not surprised when he opens the door and you see his hair is still half wet from the shower. He’s definitely party ready, and when you mean party ready, he’s wearing the same loose black tee and grey joggers he wears to sleep. His socks don’t match and you try not to laugh, because it would be a bad look for you, to show up intoxicated, and apparently crazy. 

“Oh (y/n), what are you doing here? Oh shit is today Friday? I totally forgot, Haechan is going to kill me-'' He looks at you and then pauses, scrunching up his nose. “Have you been drinking?”

“No.” you say sarcastically, but it definitely falls short of Mark because he looks at you like he does not believe you. Good, because he shouldn’t.

He sighs, and ushers you in his room. It’s dark, with the only light emitting from the little steel lamp on his desk, which is covered with his notes, pencils, a textbook, and some highlighters. When you finally make your way to his bed (with difficulty) he sighs again, and you silently scold yourself for having that mini drinking contest with Haechan. If you thought you could handle your alcohol well, Haechan was an absolute monster. 

You nearly screech when Mark flashes a mini flashlight in your face, and he tells you to calm down before someone thinks he’s committing murder. He holds your face still with his index finger resting on your cheek and his thumb lifting your chin. You try your best not to squint when he tells you to, instead focusing on his face. He’s so close, you can feel his warm breath on your face. If you weren’t already so flushed from drinking, you suspect you’d look beet red now. 

“Well, your pupils still dilate normally, so I don’t think you have alcohol poisoning-”

The world is moving a little, so you plop backwards on his bed— albeit a little harder than expected because he rushes over to you and looks concerned. 

“-but I don’t think that’s the problem here.” he finishes. 

Your eyes are closed, mainly because his bed is really comfy. “I’m here to pick you up.” and as if to emphasize your point, you wildly start pointing in all directions, hoping it would land on him. 

You open your eyes when you feel him grab your finger and turn it thirty degrees to the left, just  stopping at his chest. Your sense of direction must be really bad, because it turns out you were pointing at nothing. 

“I don’t think we’re going anywhere for awhile”

“Noooooo” you wail, and Mark lets go of your hand to sit back down on his desk, and unsurprisingly, begins reading his textbook again. How he is able to focus with you in the background, you don’t know, but it must have taken years of practice.

At this point, you decide to take matters into your own hands. You shove yourself off the bed and grab his arms from behind him. His roller chair scoots a few inches before he stops it.

“You’re not exactly making great case for yourself here”

“Stop making excuses!” 

You aim straight towards the armpits, and you’re confused at the lack of reaction, so you reach over to squeeze his knee. Almost immediately, he crumples over, almost falling off the chair. 

“Can you-” he says mid laugh, “please” he gasps, “Stop that!”

You respond by attacking his other knee, and it’s over. He falls off his chair and you go down with him. The difference is that he recovers quickly, and starts tickling you back in revenge. 

You’re sensitive, so it feels like you’re dying. You try to use his arm as leverage to push yourself up, but next thing you know he’s toppeling over you. You close your eyes and wait for your head to kiss the cold hard floor but it never comes, because Mark's hand cradles your head, breaking the fall.

When you open your eyes, he’s closer than ever before, noses touching. Lips a mere centimetres away and in a weird embrace, you resist the urge to close the distance. 

Mark has always been good looking, especially now, so close to you. You don’t know why you’ve never noticed it before.

When he pulls away he’s flustered, and for the first time, so are you. 

It’s an awkward silence, with you still on the floor as he stands up, rubbing the dusk from his knees. He scratches the back of his head and offers you a hand 

“Let’s head out,” he says.

“Yeah, let’s.” you echo. 

…

Although Haechan berates you for being more than a little late to the party, he’s overjoyed that you somehow managed to show up with Mark. Not that he didn’t have faith in you anyways, he tells you. It’s just that Mark is married to his Biology textbook, and she runs a tight ship. By the time you reached the frat with Mark, you’ve sobered up enough to enjoy yourself normally, 

It’s when you wake up in the morning, that you’re not okay. It’s not okay, because you dreamt of Mark, and that’s weird, because you and Mark were just friends, right? And you always will be. 

It’s not a big deal because friends dream of friends. Dreams are a product of your own desires environment, you tell yourself, it’s perfectly normal because you spend so much time with him.

What is not normal, is when you see Mark the following Monday, and are worried about it. You’re nervous the whole time, and it gets worse when you slide the little watermelon filled tupperware container across the table in apology for last Friday. He likes his watermelon cut up into little cubes, you remembered (why do you remember?), and you avoid his eyes, pushing a stray piece of hair behind your face. 

Mark, oblivious as usual, doesn’t really notice anything until 10 minutes in, as if your lack of rambling surprises him. Munching on the cubes, he asks if you’re okay.

“Yeah, I am.”

No you are not. You are utterly fucked. 

…

“But you need to promise me you won’t judge or make fun of me for it”

“Just say it already, Jesus.”

“It’s just so embarrassing.”

“Oh my god, are you in love with me?”

“No!” 

When placing your hands in your face, Haechan grants mercy on you, patting you on the back instead of teasing you further.

“I don’t know what else could be so important that you need to talk to me in person. Unless…. it’s about Mark?”

His hands stop soothingly rubbing your back and instead starts slapping it, waiting for you to laugh along with him. When he doesn’t get a response he gasps. Turning his head sideways to face you, he pries your fingers apart.

“No fucking way.”

“Right?” you moan.

“I was just joking, but I can’t say I didn’t expect it.”

You remove your hands from your face and look at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Like, you’ve known each other forever. You spend a lot of time together too. Someone was bound to catch feelings eventually.”

You don’t respond, instead choosing to sulk.

“You know I’m right. You just don’t want to admit it because you’re the loser in this situation.”

Right he is, because you’ve been avoiding Mark for the past few weeks like the plague. You’ve told him that you’ve been busy with your final term paper (you’re not, you’re an engineering major why would you have one?), and although he was a little confused, he was probably also a little thankful because the MCAT was only a month away. 

As you tell him about your plight, Haechan listens thoughtfully, “mhming” and “ahh-ing” at all the right places.

“I don’t see how ignoring him helps you at all. I would say to just talk to him about it, but it’s Mark, he probably hasn’t thought about you that way at all.”

“Thanks,” you grumble. “So I’m basically one of the boys.”

“No really, mans might as well be the anemone from Nemo, I’ve never seen him interested in anyone.” Haechan sighs. “This is a tough one.”

“I’m sure I’ll think of something, but I might have to get creative.”

“I’d like to see you try Hyuck.”

…

It’s 9pm Sunday night, and there’s a knock on your door. It’s strange you think, because it’s a Sunday, and it’s a little late to be doing anything.

When you open the door, there he is, Mark Lee in all his 5’9’ glory, with a little bag in hand, in it your favorite milk tea. 

“It’s Sunday.” you say, intelligently. 

Mark just chuckles. “Yes it is, and your point?”

You step aside so he can walk in, and you’re embarrassed at your current state. For once, you’ve finished your assignments early, so you’ve spent the past four hours in your pajamas watching K-dramas and snacking on honey chips. You must look like a bum.

Mark on the other hand, always looks good, even in some old dress slacks, and an old t-shirt with some holes in it. He smells faintly of antiseptic, so he must have just come from a volunteering shift at the hospital. 

“It’s nice of you to drop by,” you poke the straw into the bubble tea. “And thank you for the bubble tea.”

“You’ve been busy recently so I figured you’d need it for the caffeine content, but it’s not like you sleep anyway.” he jokes. “How’s the term paper going?”

“The term paper? Oh right, the term paper. It’s alright,” you lie. “Just a couple of pages left. Beats having to take the MCAT though.”

Mark looks tired, with his hair slightly overgrown and his dark circles hallower than usual. You feel bad—he has a habit of overworking himself; you’re usually there to check on him but lately you haven’t, and he’s kind and thoughtfull enough to bring you something because he thinks you’re stressed.

“Yeah tell me about it,” Mark takes a seat next to you on your bed, head hitting the wall with a soft thump. “It’s going to be all over next week though, I can’t wait. I’ve missed you though.”

Busy silently cursing at yourself for the way your heart flutters at his admission, you forget to respond. Mark frowns, places his hand on your thigh in an attempt to soothe you, and it has the opposite effect—you think you might go into cardiac arrest. 

“Is something wrong?”

“N-no.” you stammer. “Just stressed. ”

Mark makes things worse by leaning in closer, gently placing the back of his hand on your forehead. “You’re kinda hot.”

“I am?”

“Yeah, like I think you may be running a fever.”

He hops off the bed, and rummages around in his little black bag, and pulls out a thermometer. He places a little sleeve on the end, and motions for you to open your mouth. When it beeps, he takes it out of your mouth and looks at the result.

“Your temperature is fine, but you should rest. I’ll see you soon okay?” He pats your head. “Take it easy, I know you’ll do great.”

…

You might not have a term paper, but what you do have is a physics final. 

The desk area is littered with eraser dust, crumpled paper, and half filled styrofoam cups of coffee that have since gotten stale. You swear to god that Physics was a subject meant to torture, not enrich the lives of college students. At this rate, you were seriously debating dropping out to become a stripper. 

Haechan, not sensing your dismay, disrupts your plans to drop out by telling you something that puts a damper on the rest of your day, as if Physics wasn’t doing that already.

“Have you noticed that Mark’s been hanging out a lot with that one girl lately? What’s her name? So-bin, Yee-ben, Ben 10, ”

“Yebin,” you snap. “And don’t ever disrespect Ben 10 like that again. ”

Haechan lifts his hands up, “ I agree she’s a total bitch, but man is she hot.”

“Aren’t you supposed to make me feel better, not worse?” 

Haechan’s face softens and for once in his life, looks a little sorry. “All I’m saying is if you don’t do something soon, someone might do it for you. I overheard her saying something about her and Mark going to spring fling together.”

He’s not wrong, but Mark, at Spring fling? At a Darty? Willingly? His idea of a good time was studying.

“You’re kidding,” you scoff.  “As if he’d be caught dead at something like that.”

“I don’t know (y/n). He doesn’t really have much else to do now that the MCAT is over.”

Right, the MCAT. He took it last week. You mentally slap yourself for not asking how it went. 

“Speak of the devil.” Haechan says quietly, motioning behind you.

There she is through the glass, Yebin, pulling a seat next to Mark, not before sneaking up behind him and planting a fat kiss right on his cheek.

…

Maybe if this were a movie, you’d cry all weekend and he’d make it up to you; But this is real life, so you secretly cry for a week and sulk for the rest of the month, blaming your puffy eyes on seasonal allergies (In real life, Mark can’t make it up to you because he did nothing wrong. He’s also not even aware that you like him, but that’s besides the point).

Despite Haechan’s attempt to convince you that it could’ve been just a friendly kiss, a greeting kiss, a whatever kiss, you insist that you’re done with your little crush, that it had shriveled up and died. Although not so convinced, Haechan drops the subject all together and instead resorts to comforting you in his own way, which mainly just consists of making fun of you about other things.

Mark is a touchy subject, and you’re still avoiding him. Why? You don’t really know. You know it’s not fair to Mark, who is probably very hurt and confused at your lack of communication. Nonetheless, he doesn’t question it, and is so infuriatingly mature with his emotions that you suspect that he even respects it, because he stops texting you after a while. 

You feel bad about stonewalling him, leaving him in the dark, but really, what would you say to him? 

“Sorry-I-haven’t-been-talking-to-you-it’s-just-that-I’m-in-love-with-you-and-I’m-butthurt-that-you-have-a-girlfriend-of-course-it’s-not-really-your-fault-but-”

You shudder at the thought, because it’s just plain embarrassing. 

But really, you’re not the best at expressing your emotions—you’ve never been. Frankly, you’re tired of expressing your emotions because it never got you anywhere. Not with your mom, not with your dad, and definitely not with Yuta, who you dated for a year and half a year just to dump you like you were nothing. 

It’s not worth it, to put your emotions on the line for anyone, not anymore. You locked your heart away a long time ago, and you were a fool to let it come out last time, and you like to think you learn from your mistakes.

At least, that’s what you think, until you return home one Sunday night from the library and see a little cup of your favorite milk tea at the door, with a straw neatly balanced on the top. 

…

When spring fling rolls around, you still haven’t spoken to Mark, and if your friends catch on, they don't mention it. They know by now that you prefer to deal with things alone, to digest them for what they are and then promptly moving on—you know, like processing a death. 

It doesn’t really matter, you think. You and Mark have always been friends, and will always be friends. Nothing more, nothing less. And when you get over yourself, things will be fine. 

But really, how can it be fine when your whole world stops every time Mark looks at you?

You try not to dwell on it, even now weeks later. You’re busy getting ready to go out, blotting your lipstick on some tissue paper in your friend Yuna’s bathroom. 

“(y/n), you look amazing.”

When you turn to look at yourself in the mirror she’s right; The mascara you put on your lashes really brings out the color of your eyes, and your skin (thanks to Yuna’s highlighter compact) is literally glowing. You feel really pretty.

You turn to smile at her. “Thanks to you.” you tell her, and she gets bashful, pushing you out of the seat and ushering you out the door. You make it down stairs no problem, but she calls you as soon as you walk out the door.

“Yes, I have blotting papers with me, and no, I am not dating Haechan I’ve told you thousands of times-”

“What about me?” 

You turn around to find Haechan leaning against the dormitory wall, already waiting. 

Embarrassed, you tell her you need to go and hang up the phone. 

“How long have you been standing here? Hopefully not too long.” You apologize, but he assures you it’s all right.  

“Are you sure your friends are fine with you leaving them early to go with me?”

“Yes Haechan, they’re just happy that I have someone to go with.” you sigh. “Almost too happy.” 

He laughs, after looking at you, he pauses. “You look nice.”

“You do too, Hyuck.”

If you didn’t know any better, you would say he seems embarrassed at your compliment. 

When you walk into the venue, you’re not surprised at how spacious it is. You’re used to your school going all out, from the kale salads and now, spring fling. They might as well call it spring semi-formal, because everyone is dressed their best. 

You see Johnny at the end of the punch table, and he waves, motioning for you two to join him. 

“And my favorite couple,” he greets you two, and you almost smack him upside down the head. 

“Relax, I’m just kidding.” and he leans in for a hug. “How are you (y/n), I haven’t seen you in a second.” 

“I’m good, just been super busy. You were so right, Professor Kim has been really keeping me on my toes in Physics 430,” you laugh. “Every time I walk into the classroom I can feel my life flash through my very eyes.”

He laughs, and you all laugh with him. Johnny tends to have that kind of effect on people.

“How’s Mark?” he asks, and you cringe. “It’s been a while.”

You laugh nervously  “ I haven’t seen him in a while either.”

“Oh really. Don’t you see each other every week?”

“Well we used to,” you panic. “Just not anymore because, you know, I-”

“Because you’ve been so busy,” Haechan finishes.

Johnny gives you two a strange look but continues talking anyway.

“Well that’s life. Poor boy’s been studying for the MCAT like his rent is due tomorrow.”

“More like everyday.” Haechan snickers. 

Johnny doesn’t hesitate to flame Haechan for his insolence, and begins teasing him for almost failing Calc II (Calc II was kind of hard you admit but that is an admission that will die with you), meanwhile, you’re whisked away by Yuna and her entourage. You glance at Johnny and Haechan, who bid you farewell with a nod of their heads.

It’s fun, you’re having a great time dancing, and eating mini hot dogs on a toothpick (you guess your university had to cut corners somewhere). When Roxanne plays, you and Yuna go wild, nearly knocking over a waiter over with a silver tray. You have so much fun, that you forget that Mark Lee exists until you make eye contact across the floor. 

It's no surprise that he’s with Yebin, who looks annoyingly prettier than usual, with her makeup all done and satin dress. She’s pulling him in the opposite direction, but Mark seems to pay no mind, instead staying in place, looking at you. A moment passes, and you see him excusing himself. When he begins to head your direction. You panic. 

Before you can even react, you feel an arm wrap around your waist, pulling you close. When you finally turn to see who it is, you’re nose to nose with none other than Haechan.

“What are you doing?” 

“Just go along with it,” Haechan whispers through his teeth. Your hands are pressed against his chest, and he grabs one of your arms, placing it around his neck.

“Go along with what? Have you lost your mind-” 

Before you can finish your sentence, his lips press against yours and your mind goes blank. He tastes like peppermint and aftershave, with his lips soft in the center and just a little chapped around the edges.  

When you two finally part, Mark is nowhere to be found, and you don’t know how to feel. 

“Haechan I-” you stammer. “I need to go.” 

You hurry off, and he doesn’t follow you. 

…

When you’re outside, it’s  cold; the air is brisk and definitely doesn’t help steady your breathing, it only makes it harder. It’s a lot to process, Mark, Yebin, Haechan. It’s a lot, and you feel like you’re in emotional overdrive, with all the feelings you’ve been trying to keep in for the past few months coming back to bite you.

You sit down at the edge of the fountain outside the venue, and you nearly get soaked. It misses you by mere inches, with the ceramic fish looking at you almost mockingly. You don’t care, with all the thoughts running through your head right now, you think you might go insane. 

You don’t know how long you’ve been sitting there at the fountain when you feel something wrap around you, warm like it was just taken out of the dryer. It smells familiar, like cologne and faintly of antiseptic—it smells like Mark.

You don’t look at him when he sits down next to you, legs open, hands crossed. And he doesn’t look at you. It’s radio silent.

“So you and Haechan, huh.”

“So you and Yebin.” you echo. 

Mark looks at you for the first time, confused. “What are you talking about?”

“You know what I mean.”

“Oh that.” He shuffles awkwardly. “I don’t really like her like that.”

Your head raises in surprise, and you face each other for the first time in months.

“I thought you guys had a thing.”

Mark scratches the back of his head. “Well we do, but it’s just in her head” he says, and you can’t help but laugh. “She came onto me last week, so I finally set things straight.” Noticing your reaction, he just shakes his head. 

 “I don’t think it worked though,” he adds.

“I would think, you’ve always been too nice for your own good.” 

“I just didn’t want to hurt her feelings, you know?” he murmurs. “I feel terrible.”

“You’re not a terrible person just because you don’t like someone back.”

“Maybe not, but I believe not wanting you and Haechan to be together does.”

It takes a moment for his words to register within you, and even after you process them, you’re not sure what to say.

“We don’t like each other like that.” you interrupt him.

Mark looks visibly confused. “Then you and Haechan aren’t??” his voice falters.

“No more than you and Yebin. I promise you it’s not what it seems like.” you tell him and it finally clicks. You’d have to thank the idiot later. Right after you slap him.

Mark doesn’t question it, not even when you start crying. You don’t question it either, unsure of why you’re crying. 

“You’re so stupid,” you sniffle. “I’ve liked you for so fucking long.” 

Mark pulls out his pocket square to gently wipe the tears from your face, and places his hand on top of yours. 

“You’re ridiculous, you know that? You could have just said something.” his says softly

“I didn’t want to ruin anything. We’ve always just been friends.”

“I think we’ve always been just more than that.” he says, leaning in, hands cup your face gently. 

 “Just took some of us a little longer to realize.”

....

“That was very nice of you,” Johnny says. 

“Yeah. Very nice.” Haechan echos. 

“How long has it been, that you’ve liked her for? Three years?”

“Two going on three.” 

Johnny lets out a low whistle, and looks down at the younger boy worriedly. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

Haechan glances at you and Mark through the glass, outside the venue. With Mark whispering in your ear and you laughing, you seem so happy; happier than you’ve ever been with him.

“Yeah, I am. More than okay.”

[washymylifeaway]

MatsuHana fanfic recs

HI LOVES :D MatsuHana is one of my FAVORITE ships and I always love reading their fics! I’m procrastinating my other wips rn, so that do be why this is coming out rn LOL. Also that ask really made me get onto writing this, so anon thank you for sending it in LOL. There are some with VERY sensitive topics and they’re very BOLD, but I hope you all are safe while going through this list <3 (also matsuhana leans more to lots of drinking, spicy smut scenes, and teenage boy humor (like d*ck jokes and sexual innuendos) and sometimes I don’t remember to warn for that, so again CAUTION)

As always, pls check WARNINGS, TAGS, and SUMMARIES for fics before reading and make sure you’re taking care of yourselves (since mental health is key!) Stay healthy loves <3

CP:

plus one by orphan_account (G) 6.1k // this fic made me feel so warm and fuzzy inside LOL. It’s also hilarious and is definitely worth a read! When will I get to share a heart shaped bed with someone :( But I really love it when they just go with the flow of things, and other people are like,,, aren’t you already dating? BUT THEY’RE LIKE UMMM NO? HSAKJSH.

rated m for by orphan_account (T) 10.7k // I love this fic it made me laugh so much throughout the whole thing! The vibes in this fic are immaculate and give me life (we love a good reunion with mystery writers), it is SO good! That’s why you should never leave/stop listening prematurely (@ iwa when he was a single dad fic). 

This gets annoying fast, Makki by Ink_stained_quills (G) 2.3k // IM IN LOVE WITH THIS FIC PLS I COULD NOT STOP CRYING TEARS OF LAUGHTER. This AU needs more fics PLEASE. It was SO freakin’ funny and the other teams KILLED ME. Like how they all approached the problem differently and how some of them (KUROO) asked for help LOL. Please this is so freaking funny go read it.

quidditch gloves, parchment, and custard cream by h_lovely (T) 12.4k // THIS IS SO GOOD, I love this fic. It really takes you through the emotions, and I love all the development in it!!!! Their relationship with one another (but only as homies right? ofc ofc), and even their families loving the other, this fic is so good! Read it even if you don’t like slow burn, you won’t even notice <3333

call me maybe by totooru (T) 33.6k // okay yea another (semi) chat fic,,, fight me. MatsuHana are just funny in general but throw some other characters (like Kuroo) into it and it turns into a comedy show. But the main point of this fic was like the near miss meetings and I think that the misunderstanding were hilarious (as much as I hate misunderstandings LOL).

Magical Mishaps and How to Deal by plumtrees (M) 10.9k // I lost this fic once and I searched for it FOR THE LONGEST TIME. But that’s cause I wanted to reread this masterpiece. IT’S SO FUNNY AND CUTE AND DOMESTIC AND UGH. Also the small angst made me SO SAD. But the ENDING? THE KISSES AHHHHHHH. (I’m yelling a lot BUT that’s cause I really love this fic <3333)

hang out fall in love by carafin (T) 8.6k // I love the Makki hates Mattsun initially but then falls for the irresistible charm he posses trope. It might be my favorite trope for MatsuHana specifically LOL. Like I really love this fic and it has MAGIC. It’s like a magical version of the VA one LOL. But like no radio shows or reunited best friends in this one :(

THESE ARE VERY ANGST!!!!!!!

boiled frogs by reginagalaxia (E) 91.5k // is it possible to hate a character this much? I never realized how much hate/rage I had in me. Really. Like. Imma boutta fight this MF LIKE SQUARE UP. The way I tried to manifest a fake characters death like,,,, Anyway. If my RAGE doesn’t explain how good of a freakin writer they are, then idk what will. PLEASE READ THE TAGS AND WARNINGS, THERE ARE VERY SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!

Even Though it All Went Wrong by plumtrees (T) 9.2k // THIS IS THE REASON THIS POST CAME TO BE. I love this fic with all my heart (or what’s left of it). Like LOVE as in, this fic really broke me beyond just breaking me. Like. When Oikawa says what he says to Mattsun after the thing (you’re sorry __ _____ __ ____) and the Iwa right after (we know __’__ ___ ______ to make you ____ __ ____) (if you’re wondering wtf I’m putting here, just ctrl F you’re sorry and you’ll see), you cannot believe how hard that hit. GOD. (I am okay if you’re wondering :’)) This is my #1 favorite angst fic of all time and if you are okay mentally and have read the tags and warnings and are fine with them, then please read it. PLEASE READ THE TAGS AND WARNINGS, THERE ARE VERY SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!

The Truth Comes Out by Your_Friendly_Neighborhood_Pigeon (T) 10.2k // this made me so sad and empty after I read it. Like I just sat there being like wtf did I just read I’m sad now. Again read the tags, there is a suicide attempt but there’s also some cheating in this one. This one also ends happy. PLEASE READ THE TAGS AND WARNINGS, THERE ARE VERY SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!

New:

kiyala // this writer has a LOT of fluffy MatsuHana and I really love their works! It’s just all (for the most part) really cute and there’s a lotta blurred lines and boundaries that get cleared up (they define what their relationship is but with ~love~) in their fics :) My fav? Making Sense by kiyala (T) 1.5k // it’s very cute and I am one who loves when things just fall into place :D

tookumade // this writer has some of MY FAVORITE MatsuHana fics in it and I’m kinda really sad I don’t get to ramble on about them here :( (dw I will elsewhere LOL) If I had to choose, I would say Remind Me by tookumade (T) 28.6k and Zenith, Nadir by tookumade (T) 10.7k were my absolute favorites, but I cannot choose between them so don’t make me.

plumtrees // I LOVE THIS WRITER OMG. Again, someone who has written my all time FAVORITE fics (did I mention OF ALL TIME?) and I’ve obsessively read some of them too many times :’) Because I already recommended my other faves above, Captured Light by plumtrees (T) 3.5k will be my acting favorite rn. It’s really cute and depicts some really sweet moments between MatsuHana too!

h_lovely // this writer has SO MANY GOOD FICS! I really love their series and their getting together fics are all SO GOOD UGH. I recommended my favorite teen one above, but the other ones I loved are explicit so just check out this writer in general LOL. (I REALLY love mirror flower, water moon, it’s my favorite but it’s E cause some smexy scene happen, but it’s really SO good omfg. Also the roses series IS AMAZING as well!!!!)

cream puffs and carnations; by crossbelladonna (series) 11.6k // AU SERIES!!! I love the AU’s in this series and I really liked the prompts they chose for this MatsuHana week :D My favorite from this series might’ve been there he is again by crossbelladonna (T) 1.6k cause a) I love the mattsun hc in this (for his appearance) and b) IT’S CUTE :D I definitely related to Makki and his not very subtle crushing, and also I like the IwaOi + Makki as friends trope (and then they meet Mattsun), if you couldn’t tell yet LOL.

on the anatomy of crushes by carafin (T) 2.3k // (kinda cp but not LOL) it’s very short and cute and I love it a lot LOL. I love medical AU’s (even though it’s very back burner LOL), but also, like Mattsun saves the day is the move. Like the dedication he has even going on the bus? Especially for a guy? Amazing. I could never :’)

Parallel Lines by orphan_account (T) 16.3k // IN LOVE WITH THIS FIC LIVES IN MY MIND RENT FREE CONSTANTLY. I hate math. Just putting that out here. And while it’s a math fic, IT? IS? SO? GOOD???? And like I love it when characters are smart, like I love intelligent characters so like this was just ajndf. (also same Mattsun, I am allergic to normal math.) 

live it up, drink it in by punybastard (T) 2.1k // GAH this one! This is a pretty iconic fic in MatsuHana hell (in my personal opinion) and if I didn’t have that two fic limit on my staple fics, this would be there. I really loved the ending of it (v cute and v well done), but also the small side stories that were inserted made it all the more entertaining :D (aka the volleyball) But they are drinking underage, so if you’re not about that BE WARNED.

it's cold out here by bishounen_curious (M) 8.6k // PLEASE I LOVE THIS FIC. YES READ YESYESYES READ. OKAY FIRST check tags and warnings, there’s a lot going on in this fic. Like don’t be stupid like them, drinking underage, and don’t do drugs not a good idea very very bad. Aside from that, I am in love with sad sad sad Makki (along with stupid IwaOi) and him being a sad drunk made me ajhkjdfs. Just read it and feel the akfnakjs with me LMFAO.

poolside by tothemoon (T) 4.1k // I’m starting this out with I LOVE the ending and I REALLY LOVE the way this confession panned out. It’s such a great concept and it made me ajhfldshf inside!!! Also, recursive endings are some of my favorites (if you couldn’t already tell LOL), and I think it really makes something so nostalgic and adds depth to a fic.

The Courage of Stars by FairyLights101 (T) 7.1k // AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THIS FIC YES!!!! OKAY TW CANCER THERE’S CANCER IN THIS NO DEATH JUST PAIN and chemo (which basically is pain). Some controversy, but the angst part of me wanted him to die DONT GET ME WRONG, I’m glad he lived, but like imagine. I really love this fic, and his efforts in the bucket list were admirable :’)

we could be the greatest team by anyadisee (T) 5.7k // it’s my crack fic :D Yes, this is just Seijoh messing around, boys being boys, relationships being compared with other relationships. No pining, just me with my established relationships (and Iwa fanclubs cause those are a thing. ALWAYS).

Wet Your Whistle by darkmagicalgirl (E) 5.4k // SMUT ALERT okay but like while it’s a major plot point (lmfao I can’t believe myself), the storyline itself is good. Also, I’m all here for bartender Makki and tattoo Makki and not subtle at all Makki and basically everything Makki. I like banter and stupidity okay?

[obnoxious clucking noises] by parenthetic (renaissance) (T) 3.4k // some more crack fic for you <3333 Literally, just idiots being idiots. That’s the fic. LMFAO but seriously, I would like to participate as well,,,,, I have yet to lose a game of gay chicken cause of my lack of fear akdjaslk.

that's what you get (for waking up in vegas) by skittidyne (T) 4.2k // THIS IS SO FUNNY. I love Elvis cause he’s always officiating marriages in my fics LMFAO. But also IwaOi in this added some real nice comedy, and overall another crack fic but I really liked this one (AGAIN LMFAO).

A Bouquet of Flours by guyfierimpreg (G) 5.2k // first I want to know how they got the flour to scream, I just can’t figure it out so if anyone would like to send me pictures that’d be great. Second, they would do this bs and this is all canon. I said what I said, and I don’t take criticism. Like, matsuhana best parents proven by the magical mishaps fic (LMAO).

texting (with a capital S) by parenthetic (renaissance) (M) 2.1k // okay I just wanted to say that the accuracy in the math stuff being mentioned makes me feel like this writer was in calc ab or something and that’s trauma right there. Anyways, it’s a texting fic kinda sorta getting together kinda sorta not? Idk how to explain it, but it was funny and then smut LMFOAJIAHFSJS (the derail was just like IwaOi in gay chicken, someone call the police LMFAO).

nebulas by tothemoon (T) 10.8k // I like the casualness of it. Like the confession was just so casual (smooth Mattsun) and like the progression was GOOD. Like, it’s a very poetic fic and there’s lots of thinking of deeper meaning, but its still got some comedy sprinkled throughout. I really loved the flow of it!!!!

my heart beats for contract law by orphan_account (T) 4.4k // I too would have a breakdown over school (me pretending like I haven’t already done that ahaha), but I really love so many things about this fic! Everything was just so ajsdfljdsn and I really love the 3 part plan Mattsun comes up with :DDDD (esp pt 3). Also, to propose while having an emotional breakdown at 3am in a McDonalds drive through. A mf dream.

Reflex by hiuythn (T) 2.3k // PLEASE IF THEY DIDN’T MEET AT HS THIS WOULD BE CANON ASF. You cannot tell me you don’t think this would not be cannon asf. They would meet like this. Also poor Teuchi stuck in the middle of all of this. I haven’t watched naruto, but it doesn’t really matter. What matters is random emotional sexual bonding over something. That is important. (THE ENDING AJKFHKJ)

You're in Pink (and I'm in blue) by Hyeyu (T) 4.4k // whooooo Hanahaki whooo anyway, despite how it seems, I like the hanahaki trope. I don’t fully understand it sometimes (most of the time tbh), but it adds some nice angst and desperate confessions, and I do appreciate those :D Honestly, I really liked the way this fic panned out, and I felt really bad for Iwa LOL.

stranger things by tinypersonhotel (G) 10.2k // I really like this one :D:D:D I love Makki + Oikawa friendship and they’re really the best to each other :’) The ending was satisfying, and the PLOT omg. It was SO good. I feel like I say this a lot though LOL, but I’m just really into fics with good plot progression (or else I don’t read them OOPS).

something of a disaster by latenights (T) 1.4k // chaos ahahhaha. Another crack fic? I hope no one is surprised LOL. It’s just a really short and simple, cute getting together fic with a LOT of insults LOL. I love this one in particular, “Tooru’s dinner special”.

snakes, meth labs and something like love by orphan_account (G) 3.6k // THE ROOMMATE AD PLEASE. I honestly would never think Oikawa would get a snake, but that doesn’t matter LOL. This was me indulging myself in the makki IwaOi best friends and mattsun stranger agenda but it’s a great agenda okay? It’s a good fic and there’s a microwaved fish :D

Lemonade by carriecmoney (T) 4.1k // okay once again, responsible drinking and don’t drink underage bad idea smh. But MatsuHana just making out where they want? I could see that. Yeah. Anyway, as much as public make out seshes make me *gag* feel embarrassed, what made me feel more *gag* embarrassed was the fact that the girls? just? stood? there? Like why are you watching this. Is that just me? I feel like they should’ve left smh.

surprise, surprise by airblends (T) 7.6k // some more pining and dancing around the issue whoooo. As much as I hate them not getting to the point (almost as much as I hate misunderstandings), it was a great fic. This is nosebleed c*ck block (idk if I needed to censor that but I did fight me).

A God for Every Season by timkons (T) 18.4k // I love the Hades and Persephone trope! Okay, I just love mythology leave me be, but anyway I really love a lot of this fic. Like how Mattsun thinks it’s a little brighter with Makki? CUTE I LOVE. But also, the fish funeral is ridiculous but also very on brand for Oikawa. And some BokuKuroo (idk is that their ship) in here as well :DDD

The Best/Worst Places to Cry in the City by AngryKitten (T) 4.4k // literally it is the title. Just you know, looking for the best place to cry in the city,,,, I’d like to say, don’t cat call people cause we’re not about that here. Even if it worked out for them, just don’t do it :/ Also don’t follow strangers. I feel like that’s a given but jic ya know?

this isn't exactly how i thought i'd be spending my adult years by jadedpearl (NR) 7.5k // okay petty Makki is yes and so is my Makki + IwaOi agenda LOL. (I’m thriving here can’t you tell? Yes regular skype/phone calls constantly) Anyway, blackouts and sickness really be here getting people together. (I’m asking nicely, nike.) And Makki is smooth with his words. (SHORTER MEN MADE ME LAUGH)

chocolate by tellalie (T) 3.6k // the dedication in this fic was amazing. Like making a whole a cake? Someone go do that for me. (For mankind.) Fake dating is really something else, but fake dating to out gag your best friends? Seems like I need to step up my game (but no seriously, my best friends are PDA monsters I hate it here). Also practice confessions are wack.

FINALLY I MADE IT. You don’t know how many times I almost gave up on finishing LMFAO. Is this my longest list? Idk. But I just know that I would’ve finished faster if I didn’t end up rereading almost every fic on this list LMFAO. Like no seriously I almost had to make a post saying this wouldn’t be coming out cause I got distracted by one of the longer fics (I’m blaming Mirror Flower, Water Moon specifically). But I hope you enjoyed this, and once again go thank that anon for spurring me into finishing this list LMFAO (am I a horse? Yea, probably but if one thing, I’m not sturdy).

[quasar-concept]

Writeblr Introduction!

Hi friends! I’m new to writeblr, and thought I would make a post to a) introduce myself and b) find some new blogs to follow!

Just a quick disclaimer: this blog isn’t strictly for my writing, but everything will be clearly tagged. #persea writes things and #book babble are the ones for writing and books

About me ~~~

Name: Persea

Pronouns: they/them

Star sign, despite not really being into astrology: Libra ☾ Libra ☀ Aries ↑

Fast Facts:

I play the drums (6 years and counting)

I love jazz music

I follow the Carolina Hurricanes (NHL) despite never having been to either Carolina

I also love rock and alt music

I’m a huge thespian

I follow the Panasonic Panthers (JVA), and have, actually, been to Osaka

I’m a nerd who knows lots of random space things :D

About my writing ~~~

I often write a lot of fanficiton, which you can read over on Archive of Our Own, some of which I really like, and none of which is edited lol.

I like to write sci-fi and fantasy, and I often put a lot of world building into my writing. This is half a measure of procrastination, and half because I really enjoy it.

My writing style has changed so much since I started writing in year 6 (thankfully!) and it’s really awesome to see how it’s developed and changed. I used to really, really enjoy writing in the first person (and was sort of meh about it in reading) but now all of my work is in third person. I like snarky, all-knowing narrators. My dialogue used to be clunky and unnatural to the point of being distracting, and just yucky in general, but I feel like it’s improved a lot over the years.

Unfortunately for me, I’m not just a busy person, but a relatively slow writer. I usually write in bursts of no more than 600 words, and then get distracted.

Current Projects ~~~

At risk of sounding cliche, I’ve written some basic summaries for my WIPs

DAMN MY BLOOD | novel | fantasy

While preparing of expedition, the first prince of a matriarchal kingdom is kidnapped by pirates, including the guy he hooked up with, despite promising his sister he wouldn’t.

Things are more complex than they seem as Darius unravels a convoluted plot to restore the pirate’s lost treasure.

PARALLAX | novel | science fiction

a rewrite of my very first, generously-termed novella

A covert group of specialised undercover agents join a growing rebellion against the ruling government. They uncover a shocking plot that derails their plans, and in the midst of the fighting they receive orders that may put the group in even more danger than simply being behind enemy lines.

Come and chat with me! ~~~

Feel free to send me asks and tag me in things! I like answering questions and talking to people about stuff! I’m just Australian, I don’t bite, I promise //jk, lh

[hatsukeii]

I just squealed in my living room because I got a songfic idea and I AHHHHHHHH my mom thinks I have a problem lmao sorry madre

I’m gonna make it up to you with some pure fluff.

No angst, no mental issues, no tragic event, just fluff.

And it’s also not a request because I’ll do those later lol procrastination

And for once I’m giving you a non depressed Tsukishima so cherish the moment while it lasts because depressed Tsukishima is gonna be back

Frozen// Tsukishima Kei x Reader

Word count: 2000+

Warnings: Mild to no swearing

Summary: It’s fluff hours

Your entire body feels hot, as if everything inside of you is burning up. Your nose is tinted red as a blush spreads through your cheeks, a snowflake floating down and landing on the tip of it. Thank god it’s pitch black at night, or you would just dig a hole and crawl into it out of embarrassment. The coat that is draped around you only adds to the effect, warming your body up like a radiation heater. It’s a pretty big coat, considering the fact that it belongs to someone who’s a whole foot taller than you. You hug yourself under the thick fabric, taking in the scent as you snuggled into it. It’s snowing like crazy in the empty streets of Miyagi, and the only thing keeping you somewhat warm is this huge ass trench coat that Tsukishima was nice enough to borrow to you. “Dude, are we there yet? It’s cold as hell out here. I came to sketch flowers, not let you haul my frozen body back home as a statue.” You scoff, letting out a dry chuckle. “No one asked you to give me your coat. And just hold on, we’re almost there. Just take your coat back, I don’t want you getting sick.” The blond rolls his eyes, his face breaking into that iconic shit eating smirk. “You look like you’re getting pretty comfy with it.” “Shut up! I’m trying to be nice over here!” Tsukshima’s fingers fiddle with each other in his pant pockets. Just a few minutes ago, when he saw you start shivering, he didn’t hesitate to take his thick coat off and throw it at you. He would rather die than admit it, but he felt like a million butterflies hatched from his stomach, and made their way all the way up to his chest as well. Under the dim moonlight, if you pay enough attention, you should be able to notice the beet red in the tips of his ears. Although it’s negative two degrees out, he only feels slightly colder than usual. He’s wearing about three layers, not including the coat he gave you. A tight fitting long sleeved shirt, a slightly thicker shirt, and a wool sweater is enough to keep him warm. In addition to that, he’s also extremely flustered, his entire body tingling with warmth. He’s trying his best to flirt with you, teasing you and poking fun at your tiny figure who is now making sweater paws with his coat. His heart is thumping so wildly that he’s somewhat nervous about you being able to hear it. In his bag, a camera, a notebook, his phone, and his pencil case make occasional shuffling noises. Maybe that’s why you can’t hear the drums hammering in his chest, threatening to reveal themselves.

“Right ahead, they start blooming right under that bridge.” You point to a wooden bridge, a field of moon flowers starting to bloom in the pitch black night. The moon reflects off their surfaces, letting them illuminate the area around them a beautiful hue of maya blue. Tsukishima’s eyes sparkle in the moonlight as he stares at the flowers in awe. “Wow, they’re really pretty.” You chuckle, glancing back at him cheekily. “I told you, they look awesome don’t they?” The blond ignores you, completely mesmerised by the blooming moon flowers as he wanders onto the bridge, you trailing closely behind him. He grabs his bag, and sits down, back pressing against the railing. You take a seat next to him, hugging yourself in his coat. He reaches into the relatively large laptop bag, pulling out a camera case. You watch him fiddle with the settings, more so observing his face more than anything else. You watch as his eyes squint slightly as he tries toggling a knob, before bringing the camera up to his face and testing it out, before pouting slightly, continuing his toggling. Finally, he stands up, walking to the edge of the bridge as he snaps a photo of the moon flowers. He walks back to where you are, plopping down next to you as he pulls the picture up, blowing some snowflakes off of the camera. His lips curl up into a rare smile as he stares at the photo. “Nice.” You try your best to stay calm, but deep down inside, you’re about to squeal like a crazy fangirl. You didn’t think he could get any more handsome, but Tsukishima Kei looks like a whole ass god in front of you right now, the cold hues of the night complimenting his looks perfectly as tiny snowflakes make their way onto his lashes. The peaceful smile on his face is soon replaced by a sly smirk. “Enjoying the view or something?” If you knew better, you should’ve been able to tell how much he enjoyed the fact that you were staring at him. He doesn’t care if it’s just some random person that admires him, but when it comes to you, everything matters. You snap out of your tiny trance, going beet red. “I just dozed off with my eyes open, don’t get cocky idiot.” The boy chuckles, pulling his pencil case and notebook out of the bag. He takes a look at the photo, before starting to sketch. You sit there, not knowing what to do. Here you are, alone with the person you’ve liked for a solid two years, sitting in peaceful silence as he sketches moon flowers. This is everything you could possibly ask for, except you’re terrified to say anything. You hold your words back, not wanting to jeopardise the close friendship you managed to form with the cold middle blocker. You rack your brains, desperately trying to think of a way to interact with him.

“Hey Tsukki?”

The blond glances at you, pencil still in hand.

“Yeah?”

“It’s sad boy hours, wanna rant?”

He leads his eyes back to the semi-completed sketch, continuing to swipe tiny strokes on the paper.

“You want me to start?”

You nod, hugging yourself tighter.

Tsukishima sighs, glancing at you once more, before looking down. He contemplates his options. Should he rant about a real issue that had been bothering him forever, or a random thing that happened during school? He weighed the options, comparing the stakes.

“Sad boy hours are the best. I get to rant to you as much as I can. I’m gonna get it out there and just tell you this. There’s this girl that I like a lot.”

Your heart drops, but you play it off and wiggle your eyebrows at him.

“Ooooh Tsukishima salt lord Kei has a cruuuuuush~”

The blond rolls his eyes, feeling his cheeks go warm.

“Shut up and let me talk shortie. There’s this girl I really like, but I can’t tell her anything because if I do she might stop being friends with me. I can’t afford to let that happen, so I stay silent, but it hurts knowing that someone else can swoop in and take her any day. I- damn, she’s just amazing. It’s hard not knowing what she thinks about me. She might hate me, or she might like me back. I wouldn’t know until I ask, but I’m too scared to do that. It’s been bothering me since last year and quite frankly it won’t get out of my head.” He goes silent, waiting for your response.

“Dude, same. I feel you. I’ve liked someone for years, and yet I still haven’t confessed to him. Honestly it bothers me too, but I don’t know what to do myself. I can give you advice, but I won’t act on it because I don’t know how to. The risk is too high and I can’t lose another close friend.” You stop, playing with the hem of the thick coat as wind blows around you two.

“What do you think I should do then?”

You huff out, a puff of steam coming out from your mouth.

“You should totally just tell her. She would understand if she was a real friend. If your feelings end up unrequited and she stops being friends with you because of that then it’s just immature. To be honest she probably likes you too, I mean who wouldn’t? You’re literally top tier boyfriend material, there’s no way she hasn’t fallen for you yet.” Pointing at him, you wave your index finger in circles around him, hyping him up. Although you’re slightly disheartened by the fact that Tsukishima already likes somebody, you’re still determined to help him get to whoever this girl is. As long as he’s happy, your issues can wait.

The blond chuckles dryly, his mind racing.

“It’s not that easy you know. Are you sure this is gonna work?”

You slyly smile, nodding your head furiously. You’re all here for Tsukishima confessing to the girl of his dreams even if it hur-

“It’s you.”

Wait what?

Your mind goes blank for a second, trying to process the words that just came out of his mouth. His statement echoes through your head loud and clear. Your mouth slowly drops, hanging open as it curls up into a wide smile. You start to laugh until you grab your stomach and double over. Tsukishima stares at you in confusion. “What?” You wipe the tears in your eyes, continuing to laugh your ass off while you shake your head. “No way, there’s no way you like me. Never in a million years. Dude stop joking around and call your crush, I wanna see her reaction! Plus, I’m not good enough for you, you’re literally the definition of perfecti-”

You shut up as you feel a pair of lips on yours, and a hand pulling your chin in. You gasp in surprise, not knowing how to react. It’s like you’re suddenly hypersensitive to everything around you. The glow of the flowers seem more vibrant than when you first got here. The wind felt colder than it should have. The moon is blindingly bright, like a flashlight in a cave, illuminating everything. You can feel every single snowflake that lands on you, tingling your skin. Feeling the grip on your chin that loosened, you pull away slightly, eyes agape and face dusted red as you stare back at Tsukishima’s eyes. Those goddamn eyes that get you every time. His permanent frown is now a tiny, but slightly melancholy grin. 

“Does that prove it?”

You don’t know what to say. Your composure is completely broken. The thumping of your heart is heavy and you can’t hear anything apart from that. Your face is completely red, warming you up better that his coat ever can. You try your best to make a clear sentence. “Kei I- I wa- Tha-” Giving up, you do the only thing you can think of to show him how you feel. Grabbing his sweater, you pull him into another kiss, this time squeezing your eyes shut as you appreciate the moment. You know that the moon flowers are still blooming, the snow is still falling, but you don’t care. All you want is for time to be frozen for this. You wish for this moment to last forever, although you know it’s impossible. Just you, and Tsukishima, pouring out your feelings for each other in a field of glowing flowers and silence in the darkness of the night. His hands find their way to your cheeks, cupping them tenderly as he smiles. This is the best he’s ever felt in a really, really long time. It’s as if a weight had been removed from his chest. He no longer has to hide his emotions. This is enough to show him everything. His notebook lays next to him, the pencil rolling off of it and onto the bridge. The half finished two page drawing is made visible by the moonlight, and it isn’t just a drawing of the flowers.

It’s you. He was drawing your expression when you saw the field of flowers, along with the blooming wonders in front of him.

The two of you stay in that position, lips connected, until you feel your lungs give out. Pulling away, you give out an audible gasp, giggling to yourself.

“Well that felt nice. You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that.”

The world might’ve still been spinning, and everyone might’ve still been sleeping soundly in bed, or they might’ve been doing whatever they were doing as the world moved on.

But just for a few moments, you swore that time was frozen for the two of you.

References:

Frozen by Sabrina Claudio

Lyrics from Frozen

A shit ton of weird flower searches on google

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Dm or comment if you want to be tagged!

Wow for once Tsukishima is happy on this blog lmaooo

Have fun reading this thing that I spent like hours on

[shinahbee]

Premonition of future events

Hello!

so I wasn’t going to post anything this week since i’m currently working on something for next week, but this has something to do with what I’m planning to post next week so i thought I would share my thoughts.

so as you may be aware if you have read my monthly favorites posts for a while that I have been delving into BL- yaoi manhwa/manga and have been recommending some in those favorites. one of which I have not discussed yet, mainly because I have been saving it for Feb favorites so look forward to that when it comes out!

and I have been following some of the manhwa creators twitter just to see upcoming projects and updates on the current manhwa I am reading, I follow the creator of this manhwa called “ pearl boy” on twitter and she drew something today that really interested me and I decided to break down the symbolism within the art piece. If you have not read this manhwa, none of this will make any sense to you, but i’ll explain it in detail next week when I finish my art.

I love symbolism and foreshadowing within a story and this picture she drew is just that, given the events leading up to this point and I really wanted to take this apart and see what I can come up with.

if you have read this than please bare with me, these are my thoughts only and how i interpret the art from the creator and has nothing to do with how she portrayed her art work, so just a disclaimer. I'm just doing this for fun.

i’ll link her twitter post here: 

https://twitter.com/inking_zoy/status/1363278273476579329

 and i’ll post the picture here, this is from her twitter so all rights belong to inking_zoy, the author/ artist of pearl boy

like i mentioned above, if you have not read the story then this will not make sense to any of you,but basically the guy in the left is named doshik, the guy in the middle is thier boss...i forgot his name..they both call him boss so we will keep it a that, the guy on the right is named Juha, so i’ll refer to them with these names. It is a little hard interpret this picture without knowing details about the story which is still not revealed yet, we see glimpses of the events through juha’s flash backs, so before that, the story starts off with doshik apparently running away from people looking for him cause he stole someones money and fled to the country side, he ended up having spent all his money and didn't even have any to buy food, he then stumbled across a seafood hot pot place and wanted to try eating and running, there in the shop was the owner “ boss” and juha who is working as a server and cook. the boss noticed him being weird and told juha to keep an eye on doshik cause he might bail from paying for his food, and that honestly was going to happen until juha confronted him and asked to payback with labor, it wasn't addressed as to what doshik did as a living before fleding to the country side but he did work at pub so i believe he was a host / sex worker or just a host that does sexual favors, so when juha told him to pay back the money he owed with his “ body” he thought he meant sex. There was a series of events both very terrible and unfortunate to serendipitous that happened between juha and dooshik in their entanglement with each other and with the “ boss “ as well. 

so it goes Boss ----> sexual abuse juha by making him work as a sex toy for old ugly bastards -----> juha has ability to produce pearls from his body...guess how. lol. i’m sorry this seems so absurd, but it is how the story goes, which the boss monopolizes him -----> juha can’t run away because he is scared and owes boss money ----> juha was about to be assaulted by the ugly bastards ---> doshik shows up and saves him a couple times and ends up working at the shop as a co worker---->  juha and doshik get to know each other after doshik saves him a couple times -----> juha asks doshik to have sex with him ( in order to produce pearls for debt payment) ----> doshik discovers juha’s ability but thought it was beads coming out of his body...LOL. he actually thought he had kidney stones and was genuinely concerned ----->  doshik had a pearl that he found at the beach earlier on and used it to compare to the bead that came out of juha and found out it as an actual pearl after getting it appraised by the bank person ----> juha met up with doshik and wanted to tell him he wanted to be sex partners cause he liked doing it with him ----> juha and boss confront each other and boss is angry he didn't show up meet his business partners that night that juha and doshik were together -----> juha says that he’s only going to pay it off by himself with his one partner, he didn't tell boss it was doshik, but i think he found out later. 

alright that seems good enough as to where we are right now, i hope my summary made sense for the most part. Now getting back to the drawing let’s take it apart, so there is a body of water that divides juha and doshik, with the boss being in the middle. The boss is holding juha tight and some people may interpret this as him having feelings for juha. I don’t think that is the case, the reason why i believe he is holding him and not letting go is because he wants to monopolize him for his self gain, not for the sake of feelings, but to make sure that he is the only person he will be able to turn to.  juha can produce pearls and he owes him money and he is using that to gain profit, that’s honestly all i see since his interactions with people strictly revolves around business deals, so once he found out that doshik might know of juha’s ability he began to come up with ways to remove them from each other, because he thinks if doshik knows the money that can come from the pearls he will use it to profit himself.

of course us as readers knows doshik is not like that and that he genuinely cares for juha. so Juha is separated by the boss holding on to him and it is symbolic to the events of his past being forced into a situation he can’t get out of. if you have watched any anime or drama , there is usually a scene where a person drowns, what do you think  happens then when you drown? the obvious, you can’t breathe, you get light headed, your consciousnesses slips away, you feel cold, your surrounded by nothing but silence and darkness the deeper you sink. The boss is like a rock pushing juha further down the abyss and drowning him essentially, he made a comment in the newest chapter saying that “ you can never get away from me no matter how hard you try”. which says a lot about his obsession towards juha. This probably made juha feel like he will always be alone and everything he did will always be hopeless. 🤬

But as we all know there’s always a person who comes and rescues a drowning person at the last second before they become unconscious, which is why in the drawing juha is not completely submerged in water and his face is still on the surface of the water. And as we see doshik is on the other side of that division and is symbolic of life and living, where as when you drown only death awaits you. Doshik is also affectionately kissing and holding juha’s hand as if to say “ i’m here for you, we will get through this together” and is the only thing that is keeping juha from letting everything go and drown in his situation. This can also be interpreted as doshik giving air to juha as well which makes sense in the context of drowning. You can also use light and darkness as symbolism to this piece as well, the light being the surface and doshik who appears on the other side and in contrast the boss being in darkness beneath the water. Need less to say there’s so much symbolism in this one picture and it made me want write how i interpret this from what i’ve read so far and how it relates to how this is portrayed. I also find it ironic that in the early chapters doshik did actually almost drown and it was juha that chased after him and got him out when he fell unconscious in the water...and this picture here makes me believe that doshik will in turn save juha from drowning in his sorrows in the upcoming continuation of the story.

well that’s all that I wanted to say, I hope what I wrote made sense and that you understood for the most part why i believe this is a premonition of whats to come. Most people who don’t know this story will just think its a picture of three dudes having a threesome and that is not it.lol. I’m curious as to how other people interpret this, i’ve read one so far and she had a similar analogy to how i interpreted the art, so i guess i’m not too far off. 

hopefully you all enjoyed reading this, it was fun for me, since I’m currently bleeding out of my ass and procrastinating doing other things and a little pissy from having certain stupid memes flooding my Instagram.  I hope you all are interested in reading pearl boy after this if you have not...obviously be over the age of 18 since it does deal with mature themes!

hope you enjoyed reading! give this a like if you want to see my fan art for this series next week!

see you all then.

sheena

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social media:

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Deviantart: she-be.deviantart.com

Instagram: shinb_art

Tumblr: shinahbee

[kpopisthereasonihavenolife]

genre: college au, teacher/student, dance instructor!hoseok, dance student! y/n, fluff 

warning(s)!!!: college stress (duh), y/n waited a couple years after high school before college for fiances, it’s not a college au unless someone works at a coffee shop lol, flirty hoseok, y/n might be a bit ditzy but in a cute way, y/n is also scared of storms 

w.count: 5.4k

summary: moving to Seoul, South Korea had been a dream of yours and when you found out that you got accept at one of the best universities, you couldn’t have been happier!  That is until you met your dance teacher.  He was handsome, but strict and he made you fall for him hard.  You never thought he would feel the same until you got locked up one rainy night. 

Series | One-shot | Two-shot | Drabble | [Rated: PG-13] 

a/n: this is my contribution to BangtanIDX Prompt Twist! I got @pjmsgalaxy​ prompt, so I hope she (and everyone else) enjoys it! Gotta be honest, I’m not sure if I’ve ever written a teacher/student fic  and i don’t read much of them dafdlskf, there’s a first time for everything LMAO  I hope I did alright asdlfjakj (I also very very sloppily proof read this, or i proofread half of it then got lazy uhoh) 

“Where did I-” you muttered to yourself as you dug through the fourth box in your newly moved into studio apartment.  You were a reigning champ of procrastination and now you were looking for your gym duffel to place all your dance equipment in.  

Not finding it in lucky box number four, you sighed and continued your quest to find the hideously amazing holographic duffel your mother had bought for you just before your move to Seoul.  “There you are!” You exclaimed as you saw a small patch of shining, colorful silver before you grabbed it and yanked it out.  Small trinkets and pens flew from the box in its rupture out of the cardboard prison.

It had been just two days since you had signed a lease for this single, tiny, cramped apartment in Seoul.  But, it was your best choice of living because who would’ve thought that Seoul’s living expenses were through the roof.  It would do, however; since you were finally getting ready to enroll in Hanyang University in their department of dance. Part of your subconscious wasn’t able to comprehend the fact that you managed to get into a private university in Seoul, but nonetheless there you were.  

You sat on your floor, boxes all around you with your holographic duffel with rainbow striped straps on your lap.  You sighed as you felt a small flutter of nerves in your chest.  

This was what you have wanted since you realized how much you loved dancing.  Graduating, majoring in dance, going to a prestigious school.  It was all so much more dazzling than you thought it’d be.  Of course, you had to take a couple years off of high school to save up enough money to even begin thinking about college tuition, but now here you were.  Two years of hard work finally paid off as you were enrolling into education once more. 

“Oh shoot,” you hissed as you placed the duffel aside and made for other boxes.  “I need to find my alarm clock. I know I just saw it,” you muttered more as you began to once again dig around.  Unpacking fully would need to wait- it was already 7 in the evening.  Unpacking your new home would be a tomorrow job and future you’s problem.  

It was bright and early the next day as you dragged yourself out of your messy, box filled apartment with a bag of books and folders and your duffel packed full with a water bottle, proper shoes and a change of clothes.  Along with your typical dance classes of ballet and choreography (or also called composition) courses, you would be taking your standard classes as well.  Dance history and theory for example.  Those were more sit down and take notes classes, so your standard textbook and spiral notebook were absolutely a must. 

Dressed with your jeans rolled to your calf and your shirt untucked, you walked to sit patiently at the public bus stop just in time to catch the 8 o’clock morning rounds.  Getting off with a handful of other college students, you almost halted at the university gates.  Those nerves thumping in your chest again before you pulled yourself together and finally took those first steps as a twenty-year-old college student. 

You entered the spacious dance studio your choreography class was held in as you gulped.  You had just changed into your leggings and sweater with your less than brilliant shoes with just enough grip left on the soles not to slide around.  

You ducked your head instinctively as you trotted to the back of the room. The mirrors across the studio tracked your every tiptoed step as some students were stretching. Some were doing warm ups, some doing small numbers of footwork, others just standing talking or keeping to themselves until the instructor came. You were of the latter group. Taking refuge up in a corner as you sat your duffel (that happened to stand out way too much among the others) behind you and took a seat.  

As you sat, you opened your legs in front of you and did small stretches just to occupy yourself until the class began. The lump in your throat made it damn near impossible to even try and talk to someone else even though you knew you’d be working and dancing with these people through your major years. 

As you were stretching forward to grab around your foot and feel the comfortable pull in your legs, you silently hoped that the instructor you ended up with wouldn’t be a complete nightmare.  You’ve seen and read one too many dramatic stories that involve over the top teachers who have the ‘perfect or failing’ mentality.  Of course, you knew that it was all for show and production in your books or on your television screen- but nonetheless, it was stressful to think about. 

You yelped when someone tapped your shoulder, getting your attention as you were previously too lost in thought about an over dramatic, middle-age crone with a permanent frown as your teacher- may as well imagine Lady Tremaine as the instructor of your nightmares. 

When you turned, ready to apologize you nervously chuckled as you saw the handsome red haired man sat beside you with a Puma bag beside him.  Wearing gym shorts and a jacket matching his duffel with worn out shoes, he pushed his hair out of the way of his sweat band around his head.  He smiled, waving at you. 

“First year, huh?” He asked gleefully as you just nodded before clearing your throat. 

“Oh, yeah.  I just enrolled. I feel a bit awkward since I’m older than the other freshman by a couple years.  Guess that's what I get for taking a couple years after highschool though, huh?” You joked back to the stranger as he sat and crossed his legs beside you. He nodded, closing his eyes in a face of understanding. 

“Makes since though.  This school isn’t cheap, for sure.” With another nod, he opened eyes when he grinned widely again at  you.  “Don’t worry about it,” he told you with a shoulder pat.  “You look young anyways. You’ll fit right in. We twenty-somethings’ need to stick together, huh?” He asked as you looked at him with a small sparkle in your eyes.  

“You’re in your twenties?” You gasped lightly. “Oh, jeez that was rude. Sorry,” you awkwardly brush off as you mentally screech into the void.  Thankfully, he just laughed at you- but seemed blissfully unoffended.  

“I’m definitely in my twenties,” he confirmed.  He looked at the watch on his wrist as he silently opened his mouth into an ‘o’ as he started to uncross his legs to stand.  He patted your back again. “Thanks for the chat, I’m a lot less anxious now,” he told you as he started moving away.  You looked back to your lap and let out a breath.  You smiled.  If anything- he was the one who worked your anxiety away.  

Your attention was grabbed when the studio door was shut and someone clapped from the front of the studio by the wall full of mirrors. Repeated students from previous years were soon sitting down and the freshmen were all sitting rigid- just as you were in your corner. 

At the front of the class was the same guy who was just talking to you.  Setting his duffel from his shoulder to his feet by the mirror wall on the floor. He turned and placed his hands on his hips as he looked around the room of 20 something students.  Some familiar, some not.  He just smiled at them all as a group. 

“I sure hope this is everyone,” he started speaking when the small murmuring of others died down to focus on him.  “I don’t take well to students being late, so make sure to remember that.  If you’re not here on time, I’m locking that door and you’re not getting in.” He addressed, pointing to the studio door that was firmly shut. “On with formalities then,” he clapped again as he moved to start pacing back and forth along the mirrors.  “As of today, some of you had never seen me before. Why? Well, because you're new of course.” He stopped in his paces before he turned to face the class sitting on the wooden floor. “I’m Jung Hoseok, and I’m this studio’s choreography instructor. Feel free to address me casually if you’d like.” 

You nearly threw your head against the wall you leaned back against.  You were just chatting it up and talking about age with your teacher?! He was one of very few people who really didn’t need to know your age.  Not to mention, the passing thought of thinking he was an attractive man suddenly felt taboo. You’ve heard of teachers and student’s hooking up, but only in stories! 

However, by the time the class ended many things were apparent to you.  One, this class wasn’t going to have a shortage of difficulty. Hoseok ran through the curriculum and all the points and class topics he wanted to hit and practice through the semesters.  

Two, you’d definitely need to start opening up to your classmates for group and duo projects or else you wouldn’t get very far into your college career. 

Lastly three, the way Hoseok acted and carried himself like another goofy highschooler who loved dancing more than a fish loves water made him undeniably attractive and maybe- just maybe- your hopeless romantic heart thudded under your hoodie. 

It was a week into your college course that you were already feeling tired from all the running back and forth between physical classes and sit down classes.  You felt like your legs were screaming, but eventually you knew you’d get used to it. 

You were walking as you packed your books into your bag. One thing that Hoseok made clear wasn’t a joke on the first day was his ‘locking the door if you’re late’ rule.  He ended up locking 3 students out of the studio on the second day and you made sure that if it was getting close to his classes start time, you were running and weaving past students in the halls and outside in the quad.  Rules be damned. 

You had just stepped out of the bathroom where you had locked yourself inside a stall to change into your sweats and tee from your jean shorts and sweater when you bumped into your aforementioned handsome dance instructor. 

Too busy trying to pry your water bottle out of your duffel mixed with trying to shove your wadded up clothes back into the same duffel and juggling your other class’ bag with books on your shoulder all met in the demise of your shoulder at your rammed into Hoseok’s. 

Your metal thermos hit the title in the most unmelodic sound known to man as you jolt and screech in a semi-panic all in an attempt to catch it.  Before you could shove your duffel behind you with your sweater hanging half out to reach for your fallen drink in it’s metal prison, Hoseok was already bent at the knees and picking it up instead. 

You took the chance to shove your stupid clothes into your duffel completely and zip it when Hoseok was ready to had you your thermos.  All while he just stifled a chuckle you could see building in his cheeks.  

“In a rush?” He teased, knowing full well his class started in under ten minutes.  You bit back the sarcastic reply on your tongue, reminding yourself that this was your teacher- not just another student you could afford to smart off to.  

“Well, I don’t want to be locked out, so,” you shrugged, unsure if your tone made you seem snippy. Hopefully not. 

“The day I have to lock you out of the studio for being late, maybe if you ask nicely, I’ll let it slide.” He teased as he placed your thermos into your palm.  “Let’s go if you’re heading that way.” 

“You’re walking with me?” 

“I don’t see why not,” he shrugged.  “I’m going to the same place and besides, I did say that we twenty-somethings need to stick together,” he joked in a lop-sided smile that pushed up one of his cheeks.  

“I wish you’d forget that I ever mentioned my age to you at all,” you groaned as he started walking and you tailed behind him until he slowed his pace to walk beside you.  You rushed into the studio in front of him to make sure you made it before him as you rushed to your designated corner before anyone could notice you walked with Hoseok to his class.  Properly tying your shoes, you rotated the ball of your worn dance shoes, listening to them squeak as they tried to grip the floors the best they could. 

You really needed a new pair soon. Your new job’s first paycheck will be used more for bills then it seemed, a new pair of shoes seemed to be in your future. As Hoseok started class and got everyone to their feet to work through some simple steps to get warmed up for a proper assignment on the horizon, you could help but once again admire his shift from friendly, giggly Hoseok who teased you in the hall to the strict and passionate dance instructor.  

“Y/n, could you run the register for just a couple more minutes?  Laura is running late, but she said she’s just around the corner stuck in that traffic jam.”  Your boss begged as you were about to clock out from your third day on the job.  It wasn’t too hard to learn the ropes since you knew how to work registers as well as you could recite the alphabet.  You just smiled, trying to wipe the crease out of her brows.  She was clearly hoping you wouldn’t say no. 

“I don’t mind,” you told her, her shoulder slackening. “I know the traffic sucks today. I can hang around a bit longer. I don’t have anything else to do tonight anyways.” With a promise to pay you for your overtime from your boss, you re-tied the apron around your waist and rushed back to the front where you joined the floundering staff already there.  “What can I help with?” You asked them as they rang up someone.  

“Just get me away from this thing,” they half whined in a weak laugh as you stepped up and began taking orders like you were programmed to do.  Working through customer after customer, you soon saw Laura rushing into the coffee shop when the bell above the door jingled.  She ran to you behind the counter.  Apologize for being late, you assure her to take her time and not to worry too much about it.  

You finally clocked out when you snagged a muffin from the display and made your way out around the counter. Your boss spoke to you for a moment across the display of pastries as Laura was already hard at work until closing hours.  You bit into your muffin as you heard someone call you.  Thinking it was a co-worker from the familiar ring it had, you turned immediately only to be met with none other than Hoseok.  

He came jogging up to you, a coffee in his hand. 

“Oh, Instructor Jung,” you greeted in shock.  He cringed as you addressed him so formally.  Almost everyone in your class had already reverted to calling him by name as he so kindly requested.  You were one of the very few stragglers who still addressed him so formally.  

“Instructor Jung? Really? That makes me sound like some old man who hates people,” he shivered.  “Just call me by name,” he told you.  Your boss tapped your shoulder, asking who this stranger with the round cute cheeks and healthy red hair was.  He took a sip of his coffee through the straw of his to-go cup. He reached his hand across the counter-top to your boss once he swallowed the caffeine.  “Jung Hoseok,” he introduced. “I actually teach Y/n’s dance choreography class in her major.” 

“Well, what a lucky girl she is,” your boss teased you with flickering eyebrows that rose and fell in quick motions. Your face bloomed as you wanted to throw the remains of your muffin at her. You were never so thankful you had so much self-restraint.  “I’ll see her tapping her feet or shuffling around in the back during her break, it’s pretty adorable.” Okay, maybe less self-restraint if she kept going. 

You cleared your throat, face hot as you were determined to escape.  “If you’re done teasing me, I’m going home now.” 

“But of course,” your boss mused.  “I’ll see you back in a couple days sweetheart,” she waved as she went back to her bossly duties of bosshood. 

“It was good seeing you-” 

“You're heading home, yeah? I’ll drive you,” Hoseok offered before you could properly attempt to depart. 

“What?” You asked in shock, nearly dropping the same muffin you wanted to throw just moments ago.  “Drive me? Oh, you don’t need to. I’ll just take the bus.” 

“Nonsense,” he told you, stepping beside you and nudging you with a friendly smile. “It’s cheaper this way.” That was true.  The word ‘cheaper’ was your favorite among the thousands in the words as a struggling college newby.  Ultimately, you ended up in the passenger seat of Hoseok’s jeep as he pulled off the curb and into the awful traffic that had previously made Laura so late to her shift.  “So, you dance at work huh?” He asked, his eyes set on the road as his fingers tapped at his steering wheel. 

“Oh god, please forget you ever heard her say that.” 

Hoseok broke into squawks of laughter that pulled at your own lips and the tension you had built up crumbled as you began to just talk.  You had even forgotten he was your instructor as you spoke to him like you were talking to a friend.  It wasn't until he was pulling up in front of your apartment building when that reality came back. 

“Get some rest tonight,” Hoseok told you before you stepped out of the jeep. “I’m gonna assign drills and dance routines tomorrow in class.” You blinked as you looked at him confused. 

“Why tell me this? Wouldn’t it have been better to wait to tell me with the rest of the class?” You asked as Hoseok just laughed lightly back to you, nudging  your thigh as you started climbing out of the jeep. 

“Have a good evening, Y/n,” he told  you, totally disregarding your previous questions, leaving you ever more confused.  You just nodded at him, now pursuing the topic any longer than you wanted to.  He watched to make sure you got up the set of outside stairs and unlocked your door before disappearing inside before he drove off. 

Just as he had told you, the next day he was assigning certain groups of students different routines or tasks to practice. Over the course of the next week you’d be free to practice your assignment given to you before delivering it to Hoseok. The concept of him not particularly instructing this project was to gauge the level of self-teaching.  He would supervise and give advice and tips if asked, but he would not be out right teaching just yet.  

You were among the group of people given a small little number running just shy of two minutes.  Focusing more on footwork and precision rather than graceful nimbleness.  A faster paced routine was something you felt wasn’t your strongest set of skills, but you enjoyed the feeling of learning nonetheless.  

You often spent your afternoons you didn’t have to work in the studio, or inside the practice rooms off the studio practicing. You had opened up to a few other students given the same routine and gotten their advice as you had given yours in return.  Hoseok had already told you a few times things you needed to keep in mind while practicing. 

This particular night, two weeks into the curriculum you had stayed just a bit too long practicing you had completely lost track of time.  In fact, you would've even stopped to notice the empty rooms and the darkening skies outside if it weren’t for the knocking at the practice room’s door.  

You had locked yourself inside one of the private, off studio’s to listen to the track assigned with your routine. Getting a feel for the beat and tapping to it for a rhythm balance over and over again made you lose track of time absolutely.  When there was a knock you just barely managed to hear over a small dip in the music track, you looked through the room door’s window to see Hoseok waving at you to come out. 

Discarding your headphones, you got up and unlocked the door. Opening it to see your instructor dressed not in his sweats and hoodies for practice, but in jeans and a tee- ready to go home for the day. He looked unfairly well dressed in casual wear.

His brow was dipped as he glanced outside just before he looked back to you in your lamp lit small room. He could hear the faint hums of your music from your headphones you left on the floor behind you. 

“Why are you still here, Y/n?” He asked. You blinked at him as if he was asking some asinine question. “Classes ended hours ago and that storm in the forecast is about to hit. You should get home,” he told you. You opened your eyes as you looked over his shoulder outside the window of the main studio. 

Indeed the skies were dark and sprinkled with raindrops of the future downpour.  How long had you been absorbed in your music? You ran back to your headphones and phone along with your bag and duffel as Hoseok moved to the front of the studio to wait at the door, but with a jiggle of the studio’s door, his face drained of color.  

A jiggle was worrisome, two was just as worrisome and three was completely worrisome with a tablespoon of panic. The door was jammed, the knob not turning and the door not budging even when Hoseok yanking or shoving on it.  

You had shut off the light in the private room, walking out into the lit studio where Hoseok was fiddling with the door.  You could hear the metal of the doorknob rattling under his palm echo in the empty dance room as you got to his side. You already feared what he was going to say when he turned to you with a tense expression. 

“Don’t tell me,” you spoke with a fallen face as he just let go of the doorknob. All routes of escape leading to utter failure.  Hoseok quickly cleared his throat as he looked around the empty room. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he spoke, his voice echoing in the large emptiness.  “Someone will make their rounds in the morning and get us out.  I have some granola bars in my bag we can eat and extra water bottles in my duffel.  We just have to tough it out for one night.” 

He tried making light of the situation to ease your tense shoulders.  He could understand though.  You were busy and lost track of time only to be told to leave by your teacher before some nasty weather hits.  Only to be now stuck in that same room he told you to leave with him.  You probably wanted to go home, take a bath and sleep in your bed. But, now you were forced to stick around in the studio until morning instead.  Talk about an impromptu and unwanted sleepover. 

However, it wasn’t the fact you had to stay in the studio that night that made you nervous.  It shockingly, it wasn’t fact you’d be sharing the space with your more than handsome dance teacher either.  It was the small rumbling you heard outside that made you anxious. 

The first ten minutes of your small sit down with Hoseok was rigid and uncomfortable for both parties.  You were nervous as you picked at your shirt’s loose threads and Hoseok was nervous because he felt like he was making you nervous.  The endless cycle of nerves was suffocating.  

“Sorry for the door,” Hoseok broke the nearly nauseating silence as he scratched behind his neck.  “I didn’t think it’d be busted. Someone must have slammed it shut and jammed it or something.” 

“It’s fine,” was your curt answer.  

Hoseok looked into the mirrors, watching your reflection- too afraid of freaking you out if he actually looked at you.  He cleared his throat.  “So, uh- how’s your routine coming?” He tried again. Maybe a different topic will result in different results. 

“It’s coming,” you shrugged. “Clearly I’m focusing on it too much,” you told him, motioning to the current situation. 

“At least you don’t work today, right?” Hoseok tried lifting the spirits in the room with a smile.  You cracked a smile back to him finally. 

“That’s-”

The sky shook with thunder, interrupting your voice as Hoseok looked outside the window.  The rain had begun as it pelted against the windows. You could hear the wind blow through the roof and along the window outside as it pushed the rain at an angle.  The instructor whistled. 

“That’s some nasty weather,” he muttered. When you didn’t respond in agreement, he looked back to you. He sat straighter when he saw you covering your ears with your palms.  “Y/n?” He called as you seemed to remember where you were as you lowered your hands immediately and placed them back on your lap.  You crossed your legs, bouncing one of them as the rain continued to hit the building and window and the thunder continued to roll. 

It was impossible for Hoseok not to see how jittery the weather got you.  He slowly scooched closer to your side after reaching for the previous mentioned granola snack he had with him.  He offers it to you, hoping to ease you.  You accept it, taking anything to keep your mind off the weather blaring outside like sirens in your head. 

“Not a storm lover, eh?” He asked, but as lightly as he could. He asked in the same way someone would cover a child with a satin blanket. It was soft and comforting the way he spoke. You shook your head as you bit into the grainy snack. “I don’t mind them so much, but I guess some people really can’t stand storms.” 

“‘Can’t help it,” you mumbled after you swallowed a bite.  “I’ve been scared of them since I was little and just never outgrew it.” 

Hoseok was soon rubbing your back as he sat next to you. You jumped every time thunder sounded and closed your eyes with a small yelp each time you caught a glimpse of lightning.  Luckily enough the storm didn’t have nearly the strength to blow out the power, so he wouldn’t need to comfort you in a black out at the very least. 

He was sitting beside you for nearly half an hour before he finally thought of something to keep your mind off the storm.  

“Y/n, dance with me,” he pitched into the empty room as he continued to rub your back.  You shot your head up to look at him, cheeks hot and mouth open in a small ‘huh?’. He just chuckled.  “We’re stuck in here anyways, so let’s dance to pass the time!” He told you he was already spinning to his feet before he grabbed your hands and started pulling you up and out of your cross-legged position. 

“You can’t be serious!” You squealed as he got you standing.  He ran over to the stereo system and hooked his phone up to it before setting a playlist.  Soon, music started pulsing through the speakers as you felt the vibrations of the bass through the floor into your bare feet after long abandoning your shoes and socks. 

He danced back to you as he grabbed your hands and started dragging you around as he laughed.  “Come on! It’ll be fun!” Pretty soon, he was twirling you around every which way he could before he actually started to properly dance.  You were reverting back to your dance brain as you started properly doing footwork and taking correct stances.  

What started as goofing off to keep your mind off the storm turned into a private study with Hoseok watching your practice the very dance that kept you here in the first place this evening. He had turned on the song assigned to you and the small group of people who were assigned the same thing as it looped over and over again. 

Drill after drill with different steps of advice and stance correction was more fun with Hoseok than you thought possible.  He would push on your back to fix your stance or twist your calf when you stepped so you wouldn’t trip.  He showed you how to dance certain parts as  you mirrored him.  

You both watched the reflections of yourselves dancing the same quick footwork number side by side over and over again. And each new drill came with bigger smiles and louder laughing.  You had actually forgotten about the storm outside over the sound of the music and Hoseok’s laughter. 

The storm had subsided well after midnight and you finally fell to the floor, ready for something close to a hardwood nap at nearly three am.  Hoseok fell next to you, still in a fit of giggles as you just breathed heavily.  

“I don't know if I’ve danced that much ever,” you panted as Hoseok rolled from his back to his stomach to look at you on your back staring at the ceiling. He rested his chin over his crossed arms on the floor as he looked at the side of your face.  He finally looked at him, feeling his stares and flinched when you looked into his eyes.  You couldn't bring yourself to look away now.  “Hoseok?” 

He smiled unconsciously bright at your casual calling. “You sound pretty saying my name,” he told you, making your face flush.  “You looked even prettier when you blush too,” he teased, kicking his feet up behind him like a five-year-old. You turned your head away from him finally as you looked back to the ceiling, not able to hide your red cheeks as he just kept admiring them.  “Hey, Y/n?” He called to which you just hummed, not trusting your voice. “Wanna go get some coffee in the morning with me?” 

You whipped your head back to look at him, seeing his smug smile on his head due to your deepening flushed skin.  You felt like you were on the brink of sweating, you were so flushed.  

“I- uh, huh?” 

“When we get freed from the practice room, let’s get coffee. I’ll cancel class so we can. I don’t want to have class after being locked in here all night anyway.” 

“I work in the afternoon though,” you lamely told him.  He just smiled away, unable to bring himself to feel upset about anything. 

“Then I’ll drop you off before work and then pick you up to take you home when you're done.” 

“That sounds like you’re trying to flirt with me.” 

“Y/n, I’m asking you on a date. Of course I’m flirting.” He deadpanned with a smirk as you shot up from laying down to sitting up.  You looked down at him laying on his stomach, that small smirk still painted on his lips as you turned away from him.  

“Well, I guess if you’re asking me,” you muttered. “I suppose I could go for some coffee,” you finished.  Hoseok had to suppress even more chuckles and teases at the sight of your smile he saw in the reflection of the studio’s mirrors when you accepted his offer.  

“Well then, I guess you better get to sleep.  We’ve got a date in the morning,” he chided as he shot up to his knees and palms, moved closer to just barely get into your line of sight to wink you. He crawled to his bag he used as a pillow as you lay across the room from him doing the same.  

How could you possibly get to sleep now? It didn’t matter, you reasoned; as you’d have coffee later to wake you up.

~END~

[userastarion]

are you currently working on any stories or fics?

i am!!! i have a few projects (but only a few that will For Sure be finished eventually 😅)

as of lately i’m working on a stevebucky amnesia fic (canon divergence, pre-civil war; steve gets bucky back before all bucky’s memories are as they should be and then steve loses all his own memories). lots of angst and rediscovering themselves together. (i reeeeeally hope it turns out well 😬)

the biggest undertaking i have is actually sci-fi novel! i always procrastinate on it, because i am nervous about making it great since hopefully i will be able to get it published eventually (and also it requires PLANNING ew), but it’s my baby. it started out as a collaborative story i was writing with my friend in high school and then we kind of dropped off and they very graciously handed me full ownership of the universe (i was always a bit more passionate about it and they knew that, lol)

it’s about cyborgs, a robot apocalypse, and two strangers who are forced to figure out how to form a relationship strong enough to keep the world from ending. basically. (deadly robots, dual protagonists, and a friendship formed while their lives are threatened that blossoms over the course of trying to save everyone else’s lives)

that’s a terrible summary but i have a pinterest board to help me brainstorm that explains (and spoils, though it’s a long way from finished) it a lot better 😂

[cragamiel]

Oh look, a WIP list

I’ve been wanting to make a list of all the things I’m working on for a while now, and after God knows how long procrastinating, I figured I should finally listen to the wise words of Shia LaBeouf and just do it

Aflame

Alyth, a young woman afflicted with a spell that allows her to heal her injuries through fire, just wants to find her missing sister. Her search is complicated, however, by brewing sectarian unrest, the lies of a man from a dying land, and the worst cousin ever.

Status: on hold until I figure out how to make my magic system make sense :')

Freedom Fighters of Zhenotema [working title]

Seno and Veralis are living under a fashy military dictatorship, land themselves in prison, and have to find a way to escape and free their peoples from the thumb of said fashy dictator. An attempt at enemies-to-friends-to-lovers that takes place in a Gulf Coast-esque fantasy world, so I won’t have to keep googling what snow is like.

Status: on hold for now until I read some leftist lit

Sandsong

Sometimes people begin to dream of a song in the desert. This song compels them to search for it, and none of them have ever come home. Ellary starts hearing the song on the worst day on her life, and journeys to find it with two others who want answers about this spell that’s taken their loved ones from them.

Status: finishing draft 3, begun for NaNo 23

Segaen

A lot of stories set in a large, loosely connected arc; mainly, they focus on the conflict between three shapeshifting races who have been at war pretty much since creation, and how this age-old conflict shapes the world and the people in it. Basically it’s a centuries-long order-chaos struggle.

Status: Brainstorming? Or more accurately, on hold for a bit, because it’s a massive, many-threaded, unwieldy project and I thought I knew what I was doing with it but then I realized actually I don’t, RIP

Spirit-Chosen (working title)

[An Upper Paleolithic fantasy YA friendship story] Vel and Heoren, best friends from childhood, are both gifted with the powers of spirits upon their coming of age, a great honor among their people. But as they struggle to pay the prices that come with their new abilities, a series of external threats descend upon their clan.

Status: researching, world-building, planning, etc. Basically it's percolating lol

The Pirate Ship Winter

[Gendrya Pirate AU] As the Westerosi Civil War finally begins to wind down, Gendry Waters, bastard son of King Robert, finds himself on the run from the new queen Cersei. He falls in with a pirate crew captained by a girl passing as a boy, known only as Arry.

Status: on indefinite hold, unfortunately... I’m definitely planning to go back to it, but it’s been a hot second and I need to reorganize my thoughts and also find my outline TTuTT

There are a couple chapters on Ao3, though I regret that I can make no promises as to when the next one will be up.

In other news, why are titles so hard? And also why are summaries so hard?’

Anyway--I’ll be updating this post as each project’s status changes.

Thanks for the read!