#but trust me there's a specific reason for it
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And recognising that some jokes enforce the status quo means recognising that jokes arent harmless. Like suicide jokes, one occasionally can be funny or cathartic, but making them constantly changes how you think and hurts you.
I had this experience as a teenage girl, in a way I honestly suspect mightve tipped over into clinical paranoia but we cant diagnose these things in hindsight. Everyone in their various protective ways said "you are female, men are dangerous". "Men only want one thing. Cover up, dont walk alone at night even just down the street.". I became wary of my teachers. I thought any man walking down the street behind me was likely to rape or murder me. I became uncomfortable around family members who have never shown a single red flag. I also didnt have any guy friends. I got into womens venting facebook groups and I thought I was being careful, I thought I was being a good feminist. I thought everyone lived this way because thats what people kept saying.
Thats not healthy precaution. Thats not reasonable wariness. It was abject terror. And it was leagues out of proportion with any kind of helpful guardedness. Panic works in very specific situations, and long term living your life is not one of those situations. Long term anger and bitterness doesnt serve you well, even if its justified. Maybe especially if its justified.
The goal always has to be healing. Accurate threat assessment and logical steps taken toward safety with a couple backup plans. Im not saying get into a car with a guy you just met, or meet someone from the internet far away from other people. Im not saying love your oppressor. Just that once you add up all men and all cishets and all abled people and all white people etc etc thats most of the worlds population, and if you refuse to engage with them ir cannot civilly engage with them, youre cutting yourself off from multitudes of opportunities, and many many good people who are doing the work, who's hearts are in the right place, who can help you, who you can even befriend or love if that happens to be. You go out and you take and reasonable precautions, you trust your mind and your gut, and at the end of the day you go home to your ease and safety.
It is not justice or activism to be terrified. It is not ignoring or allowing oppression, to work towards healing from your trauma. If anything, healing is the best way to personally fight oppression. "Dont let them get to you" but with actual coping strategies instead of repression.
Anger is part of the process. Make bitter jokes. But make it part of the process of healing, not of everyday wallowing. And of course when its ongoing its going to be painful. Pain, like fear, is a warning of danger. Just make sure your logically verifying who specifically is a danger what circumstances are a danger, and what is only fear and bitterness holding you down.
i see "men bad" jokes as very similar to suicide jokes. like making them every once in a while isn't the worst thing, but if you Keep making them constantly. it DOES shape how you start thinking and you WILL become a more unpleasant and bitter person and also make people around you uncomfortable. and sometimes you just gotta choose to not make or engage with certain jokes, even if they are amusing to you, because its just not who you wanna be
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(not so) secret santa | jww
(where you think you're surprising your office crush and he's the one that surprises you)
pairing: wonwoo x reader genre: office!au/coworkers | straight fluff rating: e is for everyone (but this blog is still 18+) word count: ~1.8k warnings: mentions of eating/drinking? and an office holiday gift exchange, that's it
note: merry christmas @highvern! i just thought that you deserved a little treat since you worked so hard on the secret santa collab for @camandemstudios đ special thank you to @ugh-yoongi for the office crush concept and the recipe idea. also thank you to @gyuswhore for some brainstorming. i tried to keep to the collab guidelines but it's fine because it's not technically part of it. love you cam!
âHao I need your help,â you say quietly to your work bestie.Â
Despite the hush of your voice, it seems to carry more than it should. Or maybe thatâs just your nerves over what youâre about to ask. Minghao turns away from what heâs working on and raises one of his perfectly manicured eyebrows at you. Heâs really got that down and you hate him a little for it.
âWhat could you possibly need now?â he asks with a sigh.
âItâs about the office gift swap,â you say, quieter still this time.Â
âNeed a little pointer? Maybe some fashion advice?â he asks sympathetically and you swat at him. That makes him crack a smile where nothing else has.
âNo, I need to trade,â you say.
This happens every year in the office. The picks are random and nobody is supposed to know. But, inevitably, several people end up swapping for a variety of reasons. Sometimes theyâre looking for a specific person. Sometimes they have a present in mind and their current person wonât like it. It could be anything. This year, youâre the one thatâs looking to swap and youâre kind of hoping your bestie wonât ask you exactly why.Â
âWho do you have?â he asks, which is a little surprising that heâs not asking who you want.Â
âMina,â you say immediately. He might be a complete pain in the ass, but you know that you can trust him. Nobody knows more about whatâs going on in the office than him and nobody keeps their mouth shut tighter.Â
Without another word, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper that you recognize as the slips for the gift swap. One hand holds the paper out to you while the other opens for you to deposit your own paper in it. Youâre just confused looking at him because you havenât said anything other than who you have.
âI donât think you get it, I wantâŚâ you start and he cuts you out.
âJust take the paper and then see if you still need to say anything to me,â he says.
Itâs unusual, even for him, yet you do as he says. You deposit the slip with Minaâs name on it into his hand and take his piece of paper. When you open it, somehow everything makes more sense. Kind of, at least. Itâs the person you were actually hoping to get.Â
âHow did youâŚâ you ask, trailing off at the end.
âYouâre not that subtle,â he says with his own version of an affectionate smile.Â
âThanks, Hao. I owe you!â you say in a low voice.
âIâll add it to your tab,â he says and turns back to his work.
The best part about the gift swap at your work is that itâs up to each person how they handle giving their gift. Thereâs no big party where everyone has to swap in front of everyone else. Itâs a little non-traditional, but also helpful for people that are a little more introverted. Some people expressed it being easier to just leave the personâs gift at their desk instead of going through some whole big thing.Â
That suits you just fine. It gives you the opportunity to plan something a little more personal to exchange your gift. Which is how you end up at lunch on a day off with one of your coworkers and feeling a little awkward about the whole thing. You try to tell yourself that youâre confident and he is just a man. But, you also have the fattest crush on him and it makes you a little stupid. (A lot stupid, actually, but thatâs your own business.)Â
Wonwoo comes walking in looking the coziest youâve ever seen him. It makes you very glad that you got to the restaurant first because this is worth it. The smile on his face when he notices you is soft and it makes your heart skip a beat. He pushes up his glasses and shakes some snowflakes out of his hair. By the time heâs at the table, heâs removing his jacket to reveal a soft sweater. You take a minute to remind yourself that heâs just a man before putting the smile on your face. Whatâs even better, you donât say anything stupid.
He lets you make it through ordering before he brings up the obvious. âIâm happy you asked me to lunch, but I was a bit surprised.âÂ
You try to play it off and shrug a bit. âWe havenât gone out to lunch in a while like this and sometimes it feels like we have to rush during work. I just figuredâŚâÂ
âWhy not ask me out to lunch to give me my Secret Santa gift?â he asks knowingly. You, being the coolest person in the world, choke on the sip of your drink that you take.
âWhat?â
âI was sure that Minghao had me because he was asking questions about gaming stuff and then Mina told me about the beautiful scarf that he got her.â
âAnd that means you think that I have you?â Youâre not really sure you follow his logic even if he is right.
Wonwoo only shrugs. âHeâs your best friend. I thought he was asking for you. Or maybe he had me and trade.âÂ
âHe did have you, but I wanted to switch,â you admit for some reason completely unknown to you.Â
âYou did?â This seems to catch him off guard considering he seems two steps ahead.
Since he wants to bring it up now, you figure that you might as well give him his present. You pull the box out of your bag and hand it over to him. He eyes it for a second before reaching out to take it. His face looks adorably perplexed when he lifts it.
âThis doesnât feel like something gaming related,â he says finally.
You huff out with an eye roll. âWhy donât you just open it?âÂ
He looks amused at your tone and goes to work at opening the paper. He takes a very different approach to you and unwraps it gently instead of pulling it all off. But then, his eyes go a little wide at the gift. Itâs hard to read, at least for a moment. Does he like it? Did you do too much? Are you being too obvious?
âHow did youâŚ?â His eyes are filled with affection. Like nobody has ever given him something like this and it catches you off guard.Â
âDo you like it?â you ask, a little unsure. Mostly just to fill the space.
âI love it. How did you find it?â he asks.Â
âI love fragrances and there are a few small shops that I go to. Itâs kind of a hassle because you have to search through the shops, but thatâs fun for me. I overheard you telling Hao that you couldnât find this one anywhere,â you say like itâs nothing.Â
âAnd then you traded to get me just to give it to me?â he asks.Â
âI just thoughtâŚâ you start and he shakes his head. âActually, hang on a second. I have to run out to my car and Iâll be right back,â he says.
Wonwoo is up from the table before you can even react to what heâs saying. Even though you know this is just how his brain works, it takes a second for your heart to catch up with that knowledge. It still feels weird to be sitting there by yourself when the server comes back with food, though. When he turns back up, his cheeks are a little rosy from the trip outside and you canât miss that heâs holding a larger box.Â
âIâm sorry to run out. I just didnât want to bring this in if it was really just a lunch,â he says and that doesnât really explain anything.
âDid you get me in for the gift exchange too?â you ask, confused.Â
For the first time, he looks a little shy. He looks down for a second like heâs preparing himself. âNo, I just really wanted to get you a present. Open it, please.âÂ
Youâre skeptical because itâs kind of big and clunky. And, on top of that, youâre confused about why he felt like he should get you a present when youâre not really that close. Or not as close as youâd like to be. When you tear off the wrapping paper, your first reaction is to laugh. Thereâs a cute little popcorn maker with a container of kernels along with it. But what really catches your eye is the seemingly homemade mustard to go along with it. It probably looks like the weirdest gift to anyone else. To you, though, itâs perfect.Â
âHow on Earth did you come up with this?â you ask through a laugh.
âYou hate it,â he says looking a little dejected.Â
âNo, no, no,â you assure him and calm back down. âNo, itâs perfect. But, Iâve had people give me such a hard time about popcorn dipped in mustard so I canât imagine you just thought of it.â
âI actually talked to Minghao about what you might like,â he says sheepishly and your eyes go wide.Â
Leave it to your traitorous bestie to know that your crush had something like this planned and not even tell you. Of course heâs just sitting there like a little matchmaker. âThat little shit. When did you ask him?â
âBefore we picked people for the gift swap. I didnât even think of trying to switch for you,â he says. âIt seemed like a good way to say that I kind of like you, especially since you traded to get me.âÂ
Thereâs something so matter-of-fact about the way he says it. Like itâs just another thing to say. The weather has been really cold. The food is amazing. Work is a pain. Oh, and by the way, I like you. Wait a minute. Your brain finally catches up to what Wonwoo said. It must be clear on your face, too, because he looks amused.Â
âDid you say you kind of like me?â you ask and that actually makes him laugh.Â
âWhy else would I get a recipe for homemade mustard from Minghao just to surprise you for Christmas?â he asks like that should all be obvious.
âYou made it yourself?â
âI had a little bit of help from my roommate because heâs much better in the kitchen, but itâs still homemade,â he says.Â
âI cannot believe Hao set this all up. Youâre over here planning a whole ass present for me and Minghao is letting me stress over whether or not youâre going to like the present I got. And making fun of me for having a crush while youâre over here making me mustard from scratch.â
âIs that really how youâre going to tell me that you like me too?â he asks, impossibly amused by your grumbling.Â
âCan we have a do over?â you ask and he smiles at you.
âAs many as you want.âÂ
i hope you like it and that you're surprised!
#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo imagines#wonwoo x reader#wonwoo x you#seventeen fluff#svt fluff#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#seventeen x reader#seventeen x you#svt x reader#svt x you#wonwoo scenarios#seventeen scenarios#svt scenarios#thediamondlifenetwork#svthub#kvanity#wonwoo fanfic#seventeen fanfic#svt fanfic
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Under the mistletoe
Pairing: Yang Jeongin Ă Gn!reader
Genre: fluff, friends to lovers
Warnings: reader is lowkey oblivious but not really, that's it?
A/n: so this is my Christmas post đââď¸
Daily click
"Questions can be saved for later, just follow me" with that, you had absolutely no chance to talk back as he was already walking away, expecting you to actually follow him.
You were at the boys' Christmas party, celebrating the holiday with your closest friends - including Jeongin - but this specific person seemed to have other plans. Ever since he laid his eyes on you, he had been trying to get you to talk to him alone and, preferably, outside. Now, he was succeeding.
"What are we going to do on the balcony?" you asked, trying to keep up with his pace "It's freezing out there."
"I said no questions for now. Just trust me, okay?"
Once again you weren't able to respond, as he was already opening the door for you: "after you."
And so you did. Outside, it was in fact cold, snow slowly falling down. When you looked at Jeongin you expected to see him either shivering because of the weather or with a mischievous grin, that would explain the reason as to why you're far from the party. However, you notice him nervous.
That's odd.
"Jeongin? Are you okay?"
He seems to be lost in thought, his gaze nowhere near where you were, looking up instead.
"Yeah, yeah." Basically a synonym to no.
"Are we here for a reason...? You seem to be a little-"
"Oh yes, actually" he replied rather quickly, walking to the spot he was looking at before "Come here, there's something I want to show you."
You followed his lead, getting closer to the view. Though he wasn't looking ahead, so you didn't know if that was what he truly wanted to show you, you couldn't help but be awestruck. You had seen that scenario a few times before, every time you visited the boys' dorm, but never had it felt so magical.
"Is that what you wanted to show me?" You slowly look at him, your eyes not wanting to leave the beautiful sight ahead of you "it's beautiful."
"I mean, that as well." He looked up quickly, and you almost didn't realise this small gesture "but there was this other thing..."
As his voice died out, you looked above only to finally notice what this all was about:
"The mistletoe" you smiled. He was waiting for you to see it. You look at him, his eyes not exactly meeting yours just yet "What? You brought me here and aren't even going to kiss me?"
With this last statement he finally looked at you, a bit of excitement and hope shining on his eyes. Your smile didn't seem to falter anytime soon, as it was growing even more with his reaction.
"Can I?" he quietly said, afraid of doing anything that could ruin the moment.
You smile, barely believing it. You had been waiting ages for something like this: any opportunity, any moment that would give you the chance of becoming something more with Jeongin. And then he, during the holiday season, simply makes a whole plan to give you that chance.
It was adorable, to be honest. How he was so determined to bring you under the mistletoe, but still let you silently know that whatever you wanna do from now on is up to you. He's letting you choose. And no matter when, either on Christmas or on any other normal day, you would always choose him. And so you did:
"We cannot break a tradition, can we?"
Masterlist I you'll probably like: Christmas with skz
Reminder this is just fiction!! I'm not trying to portray real life and you shouldn't believe that this is how the member actually is. This is just for the vibe and the delulu!
Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @dandelions-143 @sleepyleeji @jinnie-ret @sheraayasherrecs @rockstarkkami @urlocalmultigroupfan (couldn't tag in bold)
Divider by: @enchanthings-a | Images 1, 2 and 3
#celi drabbles#stray kids x reader#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x you#stray kids fluff#stray kids imagines#stray kids drabbles#stray kids fics#skz fluff#skz fic#skz x reader#skz x you#skz x y/n#skz drabbles#skz scenarios#skz soft hours#skz soft thoughts#yang jeongin#i.n fluff#i.n x reader#i.n x you#i.n imagines#i.n scenarios#i.n x y/n#i.n drabbles#i.n fic#stray kids#skz#i.n#jeongin fluff
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Adding onto my last post, Imma make an Edenâs Garden prediction on who I think may survive or die, or at least seems to be more likely to die to ME.
Spoilers Ahead for Project Edenâs Garden btw! If you havenât played it, please do, itâs FREE RN
If youâre still here, here we go!
Damon Maitsu - Survives (Protagonist clause, heâs gonna be hella traumatized though). Dude still has a whole character arc to go through, he still has trust issues to get rid of.
Ingrid Grimwall - Probably Dead. Look I love this lady with my whole chest. Her passion and charm hit me like a train and as a southern woman myself, I love her accent. But. Her death would hit like a truck and that is exactly what Danganronpa thrives in doing. Especially considering her death would cause the group to lose a pillar of emotional support, and would devastate a certain little matchmaker. Speaking of which.
Toshiko Kayura - Survives. Sheâs gonna get some character development related to Diana or Ingrid, especially if one of them dies (looking at Ingrid specifically). Ingrid dying would fuck this girl UP, which is why I think itâs going to happen. They have been setting up these two having a mother daughter relationship early on. I donât see this girl as a murderer, but I can see her filling a similar role to Aoiâs. Specifically how Aoi was acting during the Sakura trial, hiding evidence cause she blames other people and herself for the death of someone she cares about. I canât see her dying though, sheâs too young. Thatâs a baby. Then again, this isnât the main Danganronpa world, so I could be wrong. Absolutely off topic, but I think thereâs a reason sheâs hiding her face. Not a bad one mind you, she strikes me as someone who would try to hide things she doesnât like about herself in an attempt to seem more mature or lady like. Maybe she still has braces and is embarrassed about it.
Jean DeLamer - Solid fifty fifty. I straight up donât know, I could see this going one of two ways. One, he survives to the end (in which case, awesome, heâs honestly one of my favorites in this game). Two he dies in a sacrificial manner to save the rest of the group, as they have become his new crew in a sense. In which case, Iâm sad and my heart is in tatters. He gives off big Nekomaru or Gundham vibes in his role in the group. Regardless, I see him as a big source of reliability and moral support for the group going forward. I can also see him taking up more of a leadership role going forward. Maybe he helps out Diana in her attempts to unite the students.
Ulysses Wilhelm - Dead. That bit about him not being able to smell strikes me as a Chekhovâs gun that has yet to be fired. I can practically taste the metal. I could see him being either a murder victim or a murderer. Regardless of which, it will likely involve Wenona in some way, as those two have been maintaining a positive relationship. I can see them conspiring with each other, or betraying each other. Either way, dramaaaa~
Jett Dawson - Dead. 100%. I do not see his ass surviving. Sorry Jett enjoyers. The fact that we donât know what his face looks like also feels like a Chekhovâs gun. Maybe itâs connected to Tozu and Mara, or maybe itâs connected to another student (looking at Mark). Maybe someone impersonates him, or the other way around.
Mark âMayhemâ Berskii - Dead. I could see him being a murder victim or murderer tbh. I think it may depend on what happens with Jett, as those two have been linked together, much to Markâs initial chagrin (The shippers are gonna sob I just know it). Thereâs a darkness in that boyâs soul, and it specifically mentioned that Mark specializes in remixing songs and voices. I could see a scenario where he takes the recorded voices of his fellow students and uses them to create confusion, maybe make people think that a person is in a specific place when they are not, or cause confusion as to whether or not a person is alive or dead at a specific time. Maybe he kills Jett, would that be fucked up or what :D?
Desmond Hall - Fifty fifty, but I think he Survives. Heâs more likely to in my head, but if he does die, heâs the murder victim. From what we know about his personality, I think heâs less likely to try and kill anybody in comparison to some of the other characters. Heâs got a very low key personality, and even though his talent is the most connected to killing out of the whole cast, I actually think he is probably one of the people who is least likely to do so. Dude is a killer shot, but heâs no killer.
Wenona - Fifty fifty, leaning more towards 25-75 in favor of death. She COULD survive, but I think itâs more likely for her to die tbh. Sheâs been one of the people who has been the most vocal about waiting for rescue, but sheâs also a billionaire. And you donât get that much money without being willing to take advantage of, manipulate, and hurt people. Sheâs definitely going to be an antagonist in a future chapter, aided by Ulysses. Sheâs also going to have some sort of conflict with Cassidy, as they have been setting up this bad blood between the two since Cassidyâs intro. She strikes me as someone who could play a similar role to Byakuya or Celestia, especially if she finds out that help might not be coming. Or if her company is on the line. Cuz we still donât know what the situation is like outside of the Academy. Also, murder is just as much of a girlboss move as it is an immoral one.
Eloise Taulner - Dead. I donât know enough about her to say for sure, but I think she could be the murder victim or murderer. If itâs the latter, good for her ig. Girl slays, or I guess stabs would be more applicable.
Cassidy Amber - Survives. I think sheâs more likely to survive than die. Girl is feisty, and the survivor groups usually have some upbeat and optimistic. If she dies however, she dies mid game. I could see her plotting to murder Wenona, or getting into a confrontation with her due to her status as a morally bankrupt billionaire. I donât want her to die, I like her dynamics with a lot of the other characters, but I could see it happening.
Grace Madison - Dead. I would wager she might die within the next chapter or two. Her primary connection as a character was to Wolfgang, and heâs gone, soooo, yeah. Something is definitely up with her thatâs going to get addressed next chapter regardless. For one, we still donât know why she was so adamant about nobody going into Wolfgangâs room at the time of his death. It could be because she was just embarrassed about people discovering and questioning her about her relationship with Wolfgang, but I think there could be more to the story. Thereâs secrets in each students room, but we donât know what secrets could be contained in Wolfgangâs room. But Grace might. Whatâs more, her behavior after Evaâs execution peaked my interest. Sheâs uncharacteristically silent, not saying anything, even when someone says something that would typically elicit a violent reaction from her. I think sheâs conflicted about Eva now, cause Grace definitely despised Eva, but after watching her death, in all its horror? I think even she feels like it was too cruel. She might act a bit more toned down and less angry going forward. Additionally, during Dianaâs speech, she doesnât insult Diana or say anything. Wenona is the only one to really insult Diana, while the rest of the group just kinda try not to acknowledge it. Either Grace is still in shock, or maybe she was actually kinda moved by Dianaâs gesture to try to honor Wolfgangâs memory? Maybe sheâll help her, who knows. Would be interesting to say the least.
Okay, these last two are really hard. Figures, they have the most interesting relationships and dynamics with Damon, our protagonist. I can see this going in a lot of different ways, and they are all interesting.
Kai Monteago - Okay, hear me out. Kai strikes me as someone with confidence issues in spite of being an influencer. He underestimates himself, and that lack of confidence combined with his cowardice leads to him wanting to leave stuff like the investigations and the trials to other people. But I also think he wants people around him. The guy craves genuine connection, and he seems to have found the beginnings of that in Damon. He latched onto him like a butterfly to a flower, and I canât see him letting go anytime soon.
Because of that, I see Kai filling the role that people initially thought Eva was going to fill. Kai will be Damonâs Assistant character, his support. The role of an influencer is one that involves the manipulation of people, be it to follow them on instagram, to buy their products, or simply to listen to them. Damon can argue and debate all day, and heâs good at it, but Kai I think will aid in getting people to listen to his points, and could even manipulate people to uncover lies or get them to confess. This will increase his confidence in his own abilities as a result. Kai is not as dumb as he seems to think he is, and I think heâll learn that in the arcs going forward. He may also kiss Damon on the mouth, but only time will tell. I hope they do tbh.
Because of this, Kai is mostly safe. If he dies, he dies late game and it mentally destroys Damon, or helps further his character development. Otherwise he survives until the end. And honestly, I think thereâs a pretty good chance that the latter option will occur. Regardless, Kai is going to play a crucial role in Damonâs arc. I could see him being one of the catalysts for Damon actually trusting people in this game, after his trust was so broken up by Evaâs murder plot.
Diana Venicia - First of all, she is not gonna be a murderer. Girly was framed last trial, they arenât gonna pull that shit twice. Plus it was established that she couldnât bring herself to pull the trigger on Wolfgang, even though her life was actively in danger and he ATTACKED her. If, IF, she becomes a blackened, it is purely by accident or she didnât intend to kill (maybe smth similar to Chiaki where her actions led to the murder unintentionally, but she never intended to kill). Even then, I think the chances of that situation happening are veryyy low.
I think she is going to serve as a foil to Damon in the trials to come, kinda like an antagonist. As an antagonist isnât someone who is necessarily evil. They either serve as foils to the protagonist or prevent them from reaching their goals. She wonât obstruct or prevent Damon from reaching his goals, as they both want to go home and get out of the killing game. Rather, sheâll be an antagonist in the moral or metaphorical sense, and I think sheâll be more vocal and try to take a leader position in an attempt to emulate Wolfgang. Her trusting and open nature clashes with Damonâs closed off and suspicious demeanor, and thatâs going to play a role in the trials going forward. I can also see her finding allies in her attempting to unite the students in Toshiko, Jean, and possibly Jett, Cassidy, and maybe Grace.
Iâve seen some people saying she will die come Chapter 2. While I see the reasoning behind that. I donât think that will be the case. If she dies, itâll be late into the game, maybe come Trial 4 or 5. I could also see her surviving, but itâs too soon to tell. She either dies late game or survives the whole thing, like Kai. Thatâs my take anyway. Still, the poor bubblegum girl. The horrors are just beginning for her I think.
Wolfgang and Eva: lol they dead as hell. Rigor mortis is already setting in. Theyâre extra crispy.
In Summary:
Potential Survivors (most to least likely in my head) - Damon, Kai, Diana, Toshiko, Desmond, Cassidy, Jean
As for who may be next to die in chapter two, my moneyâs on Grace, Ulysses, or Eloise.
#project edens garden#project eden's garden#damon maitsu#kai monteago#diana venicia#the trio of all time
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Further, let me add that the points of OP are very valid on this regard. I have seen some chigmas justify rape by this logic and saying that men should stop supporting women victims of all this because some of them were justifying Atul's wife.
Like they did not see how many women supported this cause, as much as the men. It's just an excuse to vent out the internalised misogyny.
I've said it multiple times and I'll say it again, the reason that movement for men have never really caught traction in India is simply because that to a lot of sigma males make them about hating women then doing anything for men suffering.
That is made very evident when tweets and insta comments and even news interviews of this kind came up. They hate women, because they do not see women as equals. They are either objects of use or something they have to conquer. Atul Subhash is just an excuse and not a very real person.
The discourse on alimony is bullshit in a very particular way that it clearly disregards women who were homemakers or earned marginally before separation. If she cannot sustain herself, then of course her once husband, who she was dependent on her survival for, should do it. This is a desperate situation afterall.
At the sane time, if the wife earns a satiate or even higher income than him, I do not see the point of him giving alimony. Why would a man have to pay for a woman who is legally unrelated to him and not dependent on him for survival since past or even now? What right us she exercising on income of a man who isn't longer hers?
I personally see this as very embarrassing and demeaning to rely on a man with whom a relationship of love and trust has ended, when you are a well earning woman. Pretty anti feminist from what I see.
Furthermore, let me tell you as a law student, that the guy tweeting about laws favouring women was very right.
Alimony always has to be rational. Supreme Court and various HCs have laid that down several times that you can only have a Reasonable amount as a wife and that a husband cannot be squeezed out of every penny, or even most of his income because surprise surprise, he has the right to his earnings. We do not see that being followed here.
How many laws have you seen about male sexual assault? About male DV victims even though they are 1/3rd of all victims? None I'm sure. Wanna know why?
When the JC Verma Comittee in 2013 came up with more stringent laws regarding rape, they added the recommendation to make rape a gender neutral offence. That recommendation never became anything concrete because feminist groups protested heavily to keep rape gender specific.
There were certain women who rallied to keep men outside the scope of justice in something as heinous as rape, and they were priortised over literal rape victims. So yes, law is pretty gender biased in India.
Western nations recognise that men can be victims to DV and SA, we on the other hand don't.
Also, he is right about laws being misused. In my internships I came across this basic template of DV cases that so many fake cases seem to be using. How do I know those were fake? Because the police investigation following the reports proved that they were without evidence and some actually had counter evidence.
Crime against women are pretty under reported in India. This is again because of what the tweet said; societal pressure on women. A majority of DV cases are not reported (as many as 80%+). It is suspected that as many as 90%+ cases of rape are under reported because women are pressurise, ostracized and labelled impure for being raped or not cohabiting with her husband who is abusive. They want her to keep it hush hush because it all comes down to her virginity and sexuality.
Accept it or not, those numbers speak for themselves and we know why it happens, because a majority of backward and even some "developed" Indians have their minds in gutter when it comes to women.
But but but, if you look at the stats, the number of cases reported of rape and DV are pretty decent. Why is that?
Well, that is because roughly half of them are fake. It can be more than half sometimes, sometimes less, but that is the rough estimate.
Who do you think are making up these numbers when some people cannot even register real cases? Again, that guy is right. Women who are privileged enough to not be judged, or do not care of it due to the intense hatred for their in laws. Many a times their families are in on their malpractices.
These people are the reason so many innocent men and their families are traumatized for life, and why so many innocent women, especially those who come from upper class/urban families or those considered "modern" are not believed.
That guy is spot on in everything he said.
Finally, lets not put the specifics of the Atul case aside. Nobody should be allowed to be ignorant of Atul case when it comes to this discourse. Because that shows you the limitations of alimony need to be laid, and brings out the reality of the fact that law and courts do in fact prefer women and that this fact is misused to squeeze men at the brink of death and sometimes beyond.
An Indian man recently committed suicide because of a demand of alimony from his wife who wanted to divorce him. But the specifics of the case and the demand of alimony being valid aside, the common reaction of the Indian man has been insane and I wanted to share some of it here. I need feminists here to please read this and spread this around.
For context: dowry is (mostly) a Hindu Indian system in marriage whereby the brideâs family gives a certain amount of material possessions as a âgiftâ to the bridegroomâs family. In India, even now, marriage is explicitly or implicitly considered âmarriage of two familiesâ rather than âmarriage of two individualsâ. But dowry deaths often result from the in-laws perceiving the dowry to be less or it not existing because the woman is poorer or easy to exploit. In many cases, the in-laws burn the woman or severely abuse her until she commits suicide. There are laws protecting against this, but sometimes many cases arenât reported, and many do not receive adequate punishments (a similar case with rape)
How do Indian men react to this information? With the idea that Indian laws favour women. How interesting. They believe that a woman can use these laws to ruin any family or man. Besides the whole fake case fallacy, this also shows just how wilfully ignorant or straight up evil these men are.
Moving on to the reactions
Exhibit A:
Here, khap panchayat usually means a certain casteâs âpanchayatâ (a rural governance body) that is not recognized under Indian law. It continues, in many cases, to protect caste-based discrimination and misogynist practices
You might think these men are just reactionary so it doesnât matter. But this is unironically how many Indian men think, and it is abundantly clear they act on it or intend to do so
Exhibit B:
âPooja paathâ basically means saying a Hindu prayer everyday with (usually) a small temple in your home. In other words, this man believes men must force their wives to become religious. Because a good Hindu woman would supposedly never fight for her rights
âKutaiâ means beating.
The photo is actor Ranbir Kapoor in the Bollywood movie, Animal, which is essentially a misogyny manifesto at this point and highly acclaimed by Indian men despite its extremely low IQ reactionary content
As per the latest reports I could find, 30% of Indian women face domestic violence at the hands of their husbands or in-laws. But there is always an underrepresentation of the facts of rape and domestic violence rates in India. A large part is because much of it goes unreported. I can attest to this as someone who has heard of at least 3 such cases of extreme domestic violence where no action was taken purposefully. Additionally, the last report I remember reading mentioned at least 82% Indian men have raised a hand at their wives. I think that should tell you everything about an actual possible domestic violence rate.
Exhibit C:
The man who still likely has female friends and a girlfriend. Or his liberal sister following his account. Inside group chats and their own circles, we are all aware of how awfully these men talk about women. But on the outside, some trying to appear more friendly to women try giving placating statements like these. This is, as should be obvious, factually incorrect. There is not a single country in this world that favours women in law in a way that they are more privileged than men. Equity as a principle demands that the oppressed be given laws that seem to be privileging them, but in reality are an attempt to put them at least at the same functioning position as the oppressor group. This is basic liberal politics and an average man in India does not even understand this
I donât have much words anymore. The Indian feminist movement is extremely weak and fragile. It is as liberal and as divided as you can get. We are not equipped to fight with this the way Korean women have been strong enough to. Iâm not sure what can save my Indian sisters, but I want more people around the world to at least understand the sheer depravity of Indian men. We have to deal with this dehumanisation on a daily basis, on top of the threat of being raped and mutilated, or burned by our in-laws if weâre married off. There is a reason why Amnesty once called India the worst country to be a woman, despite all the opposition to this mere idea.
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Lmao remember months ago I asked for q&a suggestions for my Sam and Valerie podcast brainrot and then never did anything? Itâs bc I only got to like two and then left this in my drafts. Iâve decided itâs fine. merry crisis and happy hanukkah
â
Graveyard Gals Episode 15: Q&A Special Just for You
âWelcome. Iâm Sam.â
âIâm Val.â
âWeâre not friends.â
âWe have exactly one thing in common and thatâs that we are always down to record us arguing for an hour.â
âBecause you guys like it for some reason?â
âYeah, whatâs wrong with you?â
âAnyway,â Sam leaned back in her chair, adjusting her headphones, âif youâre still here after we insulted you, then please congratulate us for making fifteen episodes.â
âShe needs constant validation,â Valerie said, smirking at the flash of anger that shot through Samâs eyes as a result.
âThis will also be our last episode, she will be dead after recording.â
âGotta film that sweet sweet content before I beat your ass in a back alley, I see,â Valerie replied, âanywayâto celebrate our fifteenth and perhaps final episode, we have gathered some of your most burning questions from the comment sectionââ
âOur friends did, for impartiality,â Sam clarified, âTucker and Danny picked mine, Star chose for Valerie, and as I say it out loud I think that I, at leas, may have made a mistake.â
âWeâll see,â Val said. She scrolled through her phone, finding the google doc her friend had crafted for herâit was a spreadsheet, really, Star couldnât resist an opportunity to make a spreadsheetâfor her first question. âOkay, firstâugh.â
âRead it. You have to.â
âJesusâBokChoyJoy23 asks âwhen are you actually going to do local ghost smash or pass?ââ Valerie waited for Samâs cackling to die down before continuing, making direct eye contact with her camera, âYouâre actually one of many to ask. One of so many. And I donât regret to inform you that that is something Manson says to piss me off.â
âWhen thereâs a lullâwe canât have lulls,â Sam interjected, âand can I say? Bold of you to assume I wonât do it.â
âWeâre moving on.â
âFor now. Put a pin in itâbut we have something way more important to address: SailorGoonâfantastic username, no notesâasks âdo you think the genie ghost would help me with my gender transition?â Oh. Oh SailorGoon.â
âSailorGoon, look at me,â Valerie said sternly, and stared unblinkingly into her own face cam, âor if youâre listening just pay close attentionâdo not ask Desiree for anything. Nothing. I donât care if you just need a pen. No.â
âPlease seek out other resources,â Sam retreated to her phone for a moment, âIâm actually gonnaâsomeone I follow actually has a linktree specifically for stuff like that, Iâm gonna repost it to our accountâby the time you see this itâll be posted. Weâre in the past.â
âYouâre in the future, youâre living your best life in likeâŚâ
âIn your best gender.â
âYesâand youâre not trusting genies.â
âOr like justâŚnot Desiree.â
âAre you gonna âhashtag NotAllGeniesâ me here Manson?â
âWould it make you mad?â
âLivid.â
âThen Iâm making a graphic, itâs gonna goâŚâ Sam traced her finger across an empty space in front of her, âright along here. Hashtag NotAllGenies.â
#danny phantom#sam manson#valerie gray#podcast girlies#I wanna play with this again#my drafts are so full of half finished ramblings#youâd really be surprised considering the drivel I openly hit âpostâ on#Desiree
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Since it's once again the 24th, here comes the annual reminder from me that Kingdom Come AKA the so called BBC MERLIN'S Canonical Season 6 is actually anything but canon and was made by fans.
BBC Merlin doesn't have a Season 6
And every year people tell me "I don't think that anyone actually believes that Kingdom Come is canon" and every year I cry because no, no a lot of people do. Maybe not on Tumblr but everywhere else you always see comment threads that go a little something like this:
"omg the ending was so sad why did the writers do that?đđ"
"don't worry! The writers actually wrote the script for Season 6 that later got cancelled, but it's online you can read it!!"
"I DIDN'T KNOW THAT THANK YOU SO MUCH"
Ahhhhhhhh
And I also make these posts for all the new, wonderful fans that don't know the whole story, who may stumble upon the Kingdom Come blog and read "the canonical ending of the show" or whatever lie the people who made it wrote and believe it to be the case. Because why wouldn't you? It's says it is! BUT IT ISN'T!!
Why am I so pressed about it?
I mean I ain't going to lie the main reason is because I don't like it and think it is a great example of character assassination and disregard of what the original show wanted to share with the finale.
But I mean there are many fanfics (and kingdom come IS a fanfic) that I think are just as bad if not worse. Why don't I also complain about them? Because it isn't my place! I can criticise some tropes but you'll never see me directly attacking a specific fic by name! It's a story someone made for free just because they like writing.
But since these creators clearly believe that their work is somehow superior and has more value than other fics, I will treat it as such! And if you wanted it to be canon so bad I will criticise it like I do with the actual show. And trust me, as much as I adore BBC Merlin I am not blind to its flaws, and I am very critical about them on here.
So yeah. I think it sucks that a lot of fans believe that's the actual ending! Even if you liked it (and so didn't think that the show ended horribly with all its morals squashed) I don't think it's right that you fell for a lie. I had conversations with people who loved it and think of it as their personal season 6 while knowing it isn't canon. And that's wonderful! But you should know the truth.
So let me repeat this one last time
BBC Merlin has no canonical season 6
I feel like I was a lot harsher and aggressive this time around. I think it's because I lost a close family member just this month, and with Christmas so close my nerves are frayed.
But my goal is to make so many of these posts that when you look Kingdom Come up you find them before the actual blog lol. So anyone reading will know not to trust what the blog says.
And to make it clear. Hidden in their posts they do say it is fanmade. But you have to look for it, and if you just want to read you won't see it.
Plus the way they make it sound, the script they sent to BBC (btw... DON'T SEND YOUR FICS TO WRITERS FFS) was actually accepted lmao. And the only issue was the actors didn't want to come back.
Sure babe, sure. That's how shows work.
Damn I'm so salty today.
Again I wouldn't talk about other fics this way, I swear.
Now go read And like the cycle of the year we begin again. Or the Change Trilogy. Both very different, but very long and amazing possible Season 6s
#i speak#merlin#merthur#bbc merlin#arthur#bbc merthur#merlin fandom#merlin fanfiction#arthur pendragon#diamond of the day#kingdom come#merlin season 6#merlin kingdom come#merlin finale#merlin anniversary#own post#and like the cycle of the year we begin again#altcotywba#the change trilogy
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Epic: The Musical X Life Series AU (this is just a list of who would be who, because your girl canât draw to save a life)
It started with a â wow I can kinda see life series Lizzie and Joel singing a Penelope and Ody song in the life seriesâ and now I have a new AU that I canât draw because I dropped art and resigned myself to make animatics in my head instead.
(Take a shot every time I use vibes as reasoning and every time you think Iâm coping over the end of wild life and epic)
Odysseus = Joel
It just fits, also I thought of Joel and Lizzie when thinking about Penelope and Ody so here we are. Also I want Joel to have his beard from last life start to grow over the course of the musical.
after jimmy (polites) dies, instead of wearing his tie around his head, we wears one of Jimmyâs canary feathers.
Penelope = LizzieÂ
I mean if Joel is Ody, it just makes sense. Also idk the characters feel similar (according to my brain, which usually canât be trusted).
Zeus = BigB
vibes. Pure vibes. Also I liked the BigB watcher theory and it just works here so give him watcher wings and eyes for this. Oh and in the horse and the infant make him talk to Joel using a jack-o-lantern that appears and disappears and Joel moves around.
Eurylochus = Grian
bad boys. Thatâs it, thatâs the reasoning. Could see him singing luck runs out cuz of watcher lore (TM)
Polites = Jimmy
bad boys and tell me you canât imagine life series Jimmy singing open  arms.
Athena = Gem
Itâs just perfect. Also gem and Joel duo in wild life. Also warrior gem.
Aeolus = Skizz
Skizz has the whole angel thing going on and angels are in the sky. My logic and reasoning is amazing guys.
Poseidon = Etho
Theyâre obsessed with each other in every universe. Also I had Etho as Zeus at some point but then I remembered Poseidon existed.
Circe = PearlÂ
Specifically red life Pearl with her Cloke. Sheâs gotta have the Cloke guys think of the vibes, give Pearl magic.
Hermes = Bdubs
Life series Bdubs and hermes are the same person. The vibes are there and they are strong.
Tiresias = Scar
specifically last life scar. There is a mysterious wind that follows him around that makes the Cloke flow dramatically behind him.
Telemachus = Martyn
Idk what my reasoning here is I think itâs just vibes again. Also I want to see Martyn fight ren.
Antinous = Ren
I wanted to see Martyn fight ren. Also specifically 3rd life red life Ren for the design.
Calypso = JimmyÂ
itâs just Jimmy again except like genderbent. It would be funny.
Apollo = Scott
purely vibes.
Hephaestus = Mumbo
red stone man do red stone.
Aphrodite = Impulse
again, purely vibes.
Ares = Tango
mostly just wanted to see tango and gem sword fight.
Hera = Cleo
both of them are queens.
#epic the musical#life series#trafficblr#3rd life#last life#double life#limited life#secret life#wild life#Ithaca saga#I mean if somebody wants to make art#I wont stop you#Wink wink nudge nudge
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I think one of the reasons to why I love wangxian so much (compared to other danmei couples) is the way the conflict is never about them specifically, sure they briefly argue over a horrible misunderstanding during wwxs yllz days But, that's not the problem! That's not the issue of why they cannot get together, they both never (intentionally) hurt each other, they trust each other during the yi city arc lwj trusts wwx enough to know he can fight off xue yang, wwx trusts lwj enough to know he'll be fine in a fight!
And that's just so refreshing, no shade to other danmeis but, from the handful that I've read, The couple straight up detesting each other initially, or just a general mistrust between the couple and downplay of a supposedly strong characters power never being displayed bugs me, do I hate those tropes? Nope I'd be a hypocrite if I said I did!
I see a lot of ppl say "Mdzs is overrated" in the danmei community and yk what? It's overrated for a reason!! (Note: These are my personal opinions and not some claim that "mdzs is the superior novel" I've enjoyed other danmeis much more than mdzs, these are just small compliments to mdzs)
#the grandmaster of demonic cultivation#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#the grandmaster of diabolism#mo dao zu shi#mdzs#mdzs novel#mxtx
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What Lies Behind / What Lies Ahead, Episode 3
This episode takes place entirely inside Mizuki's room. She can't stop thinking about N25 almost learning her secret during the encounter with An, even though Mizuki feels confident that they'd accept her as she is. A part of her is still scared that if things do change, she would lose the one good thing in her life.
We learn here why An knows Mizuki's secret. Mizuki confided her secret to some of her high school classmates, which would certainly have included An, who goes out of her way to make Mizuki feel accepted for her secret. The other classmates were less kind. It'll come up later in this episode as a painful flashback.
While An and Mizuki are classmates, Toya and Akito are in another class, and Mizuki doesn't know whether they know her secret. But, she is sure that neither of them would mistreat her if they did know.
We also catch a glimpse of how well Mizuki passes and believes that she passes. While we already have the evidence of her seamlessly passing to the members of N25, Kanade and Ena don't get out much, and Mafuyu lives her public life in a daze, so they wouldn't be the best judge of how well she actually passes. Mizuki implies here that the only reason anyone in Kamiyama High School knows her secret is because she confided it in those few classmates herself, that that's the reason it's 'out there.'
Mizuki realizes the reason for her fear is specifically N25 learning her secret.
There's a sequence where Mizuki imagines herself telling them. It happens in SEKAI and each of them are understanding; Mizuki is confident that her friends would be accepting of her. However, Mizuki has been confident that people would be accepting before, and while An very much was, she may have been the only one. Mizuki gets hit by a painful flashback here of one of those classmates rejecting her.
I believe this flashback is from when Mizuki had told her high school classmates, rather than from anything in middle school. The episode opens with her drawing attention to having told some of her classmates her secret, so it was something she was already thinking about, and it sneaks up on her.
Mizuki knows in her heart that even if she trusted the wrong people in high school and it led to them spreading cruel rumors about her, even if she's been burned that way, that her trust in her friends in N25 is not misplaced. All the same, she worries about what'll happen if she's wrong, with the implication being that she'll want to disappear again.
Mizuki reflects on what her transness means to herself. It isn't something she feels she has to prove to someone or convince them is a part of her, it simply is. It's just a part of knowing who she is.
They need to know about me.
Because that's just who I am.
And that's a big part of why she feels guilty for hiding it; she's hiding something that's just a part of knowing who she is, from people she cares about. It feels duplicitous to her.
In the end, she isolates herself again in her self-defeating narrative that she has to face the world alone, that she is the sort of person that the world can't allow to be herself. Mizuki doesn't sleep at all that night.
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Mishima and Akechi act as unexpected but interesting foils, for sure, and there's a number of things to talk about in that regard, but there's one little thing I come back to time and again, and that's their names.
Specifically, how both are called their family names instead of their given names. It's a detail I didn't pick up on at first, but once I did, I've never truly stopped thinking about it.
For Akechi, it's not really a surprise from any angle. At first, he's pretty much a public-facing stranger even after talking to him some, and by the time he joins the Thieves, he's blackmailing them and the Thieves are aware he's fully planning on betraying them. Any distance Akechi keeps, familiarity he refuses, makes perfect sense in the context of his character, and it doesn't need any real explanation because of that.
Mishima, on the other hand... There's definitely a strange sort of distance he puts between himself and Joker, deliberately keeping himself at an arm's length despite being so desperate for connection, and it's really interesting to think about. Early on it's probably at least partially idol-worship and such, sure, and not changing the name used to refer to a character likely helps avoid any confusion, but still... If Mishima had just been referred to as 'Yuuki', no one really would've batted an eye. There's seemingly no reason for it. We even know Shiho more by her given name, even if it's primarily because we know her through Ann, her best friend.
It just makes me think so much about how both of these characters are so isolated by their own choosing to varying degrees. And even at the end of the game, even if you max their confidants and such, that distance is still there.
Both view Joker as an ally, someone to be trusted, perhaps, but do either every truly think of him as a friend? Akechi's reasons and motivations are all too obvious, but Mishima's are hidden, kept apart, and it kinda drives home how little we know about Mishima in the end. He's one of the Thieves' greatest supporters and assets, but he's also almost meaningless.
Akechi is the famous person put on a pedestal, the broken and isolated child already too far down the path of self-destruction with no intent of turning back, the one you learn so much about but are ultimately helpless to truly save in the ways you might want to.
Mishima is... Nothing. He's no one. You don't know anything about him that anyone else doesn't already know. Even when facing his Shadow, you don't get to learn anything new, you don't see the true depths of his heart. And even that fact is so very easy to overlook.
#Persona 5#Akeshima#Mishima Yuuki#God I am so fucking fixated on how we know jack shit about Mishima in the end#We don't even get to see what form his shadow takes in a fight!!! Somethign that could give us hints to the deptsh of his heart!!!!!!#We get NOTHING and it's fucking fascinating
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Even Dmitri's aggression now felt different, more cornered rather than blustery. Gwyn frowned, a small pout that was more displeased by the slave's obvious discomfort than the sith's own thwarted lust. He'd always been that way, too unsettled by unhappiness to ever let it lie. Gwyn wound around the sofa again, trailing his hand along the back. "I told you I wouldn't make you do anything you didn't want, didn't I?" He said gently, already reading out the first threads of soothing persuasion without any specific order attached. Perhaps there was a little bit of the sith's sleep magic in it too, the lightest dusting to counterbalance Dmitri's anxiety with something calm and content.
"Trust me," Gwyn let the wolf see his reflection first, smiling gently, his green eyes warm and lively as they met Dmitri's in the mirror even as the compulsion drifted over the words, "I can't lie to you. I have no reason to want to. I'll take care of you in here." He sidled up next to him at the vanity, scrunching his nose up playfully at the slave, still tall in the borrowed heels. "We don't have to have any more fun. But the least you could do is help me clean up, don't you think?"
Dmitri had tumbled entirely out of the scene. Like any good dominant, he knew the scene needed to be over the moment he lost control of where it was going. He didn't know Gwyn, couldn't trust him not to step over the line he'd been toying with. Dmitri had known people like that before, in the clubs and dungeons, that would make a great show of asking and have no qualms whatsoever about ignoring the answer. There was something in Gwyn that reminded him of men he'd physically flung out of the venue by the scruff of their neck. With the collar on he couldn't do it. With the collar on he was helpless.
"I don't know you," Dmitri snarled, falling back into his aggressive, defensive persona, lacking any charm or swagger. He could barely look at Gwyn, who insisted on reminding him of his own powerlessness, kept turning his gaze back to his reflection in the mirror, instead, touching up his eyeliner with a saliva-damp finger. "How I know you not going to make me like it?"
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A Court of Shadows and Blood Chapter 3
The hallways are carved out of pale stone, lined on either side by torches. No shadowy spots to hide. It's a wide open space, but she barely has the chance to appreciate the details. The eery silence that reigns in there is only interupted by the echo of her hurried steps as she runs.
She doesnât know where sheâs going. Every hallway looks the same. Sheâs taken several turns already, but canât, for the life of her, figure out where she is.
But thereâs no other option. She has to keep running and hope she finds a way outâor else stay locked up until the monster tires of her and ends her life. Especially now that sheâs given him very good reasons to do so.
Nothing has gone as it should since she left for the Wall. Nesta thought that embarking on a life-threatening journey to rescue Feyre was the craziest thing sheâd ever do.
Until she was captured by a Fae made of deadly shadows and locked in his opulent room. Until she tried to strangle that same Fae with her bare hands. Until she chained him to his own bed with the very metal that had once been locked around her ankle.
Nesta isnât naĂŻve enough to believe it will hold him down forever. Heâs an ancient being, filled with power. She doesnât know how, but she can feel itâperhaps the same way she can see through spells.
'Have you ever witnessed something really strange that you had no explanation for, but no one else noticed? Things that just didn't make sense in your mind?'
He obviously knows the reason. It unsettles her deeply that heâs aware of some hidden part of herself, something she doesnât even fully understand. For someone to know you like that is dangerous. She learnt that the hard way, long ago.
She skids around a corner, nearly slipping as she pushes forward, her pulse drumming louder than her footsteps. The torches flicker as she passes, shadows trailing her like phantoms.
She thinks of Feyre, her sisterâs face flashing in her mind, and she clenches her fists, gritting her teeth. Nesta will get out of this wretched place and find her, somehow. She will drag her back home, away from these monsters and this godforsaken land.
That thought pushes her fear down and drives her forward. The iron poker burns her hands as she grips it harderâitâs the only weapon she could find in that room. Sheâs been planning her escape ever since those hellish shadowy creatures spawned in the room and dragged her from the bed.
She had no way of knowing what time it was, only that sheâd been sleeping shortly before they arrived. Sheâd dreamed of Feyre, of Elain, and for a moment, all was well. Then the dream twisted into a nightmare of black claws pinning her to the bed by her throat, choking her slowly as they dug into her skin. A pair of violet eyes stared at her with cruel amusement while blood trickled down her neck. She tried to move, but her body wouldnât respond. It was all pain, darkness, pure agony.
She woke up drenched in sweat, gasping for air. Her eyes took in the room, fixing on the orange flames crackling in the fireplace. She buried her face in her hands and, for the first time since sheâd left, she sobbed.
She had already stopped by the time those Fae materialized in front of her, her eyes still red and puffy. They were made of shadows and floated around the room, their features barely discernable, save for their loose, flowing cobweb gowns. They didn't say a word even when they reached for her. She tried to fight them off, get their cold inhuman hands off her, but to no avail. The grip around her forearms remained firm.
She knew exactly who had sent them. Shadows were obviously his domain. One of them crouched down, tugged at the chain a couple of times, and unlocked it, freeing her ankle from its weight. The relief was short-lived, though, as they dragged her across the room and into a nondescript chamber, where they stripped her bare and bathed her roughly.
The sensation of hands tearing away her clothes and touching her skin stirred panic and fury, making her lash out in an attempt to push them off. But it was useless. The two shadows forced her to stay still in the tub as they scrubbed her. Then they wrapped her in a thin robe and, to her confusion, began to paint her face and brush her hair.
Their brushes were cold and tickling, their shadowy grips firm whenever she squirmed. They didnât speak, offering no explanation for their actionsâthough Nesta had no doubt it was yet another sick game of that bastard.
When they were finished, she hardly recognized her reflection. She looked regal, reminiscent of the noble girl sheâd once been. Her face was artfully decorated with cosmetics that subtly enhanced her features, just enough to suit a ladyâs propriety.
The shadows didnât stop there, of course. They seized her again, wrapping her in a dress. It was tight around her torso and flowed loosely toward the ground, cascading over her legs like a sea of stars. The design was unlike anything sheâd ever wornâor would have if she had a choice.
"Whatâs this? Why are youâŚ?" But before she could finish, they dragged her back to the bed, locked the chain around her ankle once more, and vanished as soon as they did so.
She was alone again, processing what had just happened. In their absence, she could feel the nightmare flooding backâthe suffocation, the pain, the raw terror as she was killed, again and again. Those violet eyes full of evil.
Nesta decided she couldnât stay there any longer, trapped as a plaything for these faeries, awaiting her inevitable demise at their hands. She would not let that nightmare become her reality.
Hit with a surge of determination and desperation, Nesta grabbed the metal chain with both hands and began pulling at it repeatedly. Her hands ached, her ankle throbbed, but she didnât stop. She ignored everything but the relentless clink of the metal as she tried to tear it free, focusing on the sound it made when she tugged at certain angles.
Finally, the cold air hit the raw skin of her ankle, and the chain fell to the ground. She almost sobbed again.
But she wasnât done. Carefully, she set one foot on the floor, testing her strength. Her eyes shifted to the poker by the fireplace, lying close enough to the flames to sear anyoneâs skin if touched on the wrong side. Faeries have skin, too, after all. And it's not so much different from human's, if her experience with her hands around someone's throat were anything to go by.
She began to formulate her plan right there. It was very risky, downright suicidal, but at that point she was ready to try anything for her freedom. So she returned to the bed, hid the chain under the skirt and waited for him.
She still can't believe it worked.
Another turn. Her lungs burn, and the air feels thicker, heavier, with each step. Sheâs in a maze meant to ensnare her, to lead her back to where she started, drive her to insanity. Her thoughts race, searching for any sense of direction, any logic in this place.
But nothing about it makes sense. Seems to be the rule of the faerie world.
She rounds another corner and stops dead. Ahead, two guards are stationed at the end of the hall, clad in dark armor that reflects none of the torchlight. They haven't seen her yet, too engrossed in their conversation.
Nesta takes a step back and presses her back against the wall beneath it, concealing her body with the shadows. Sucking in deep breaths behind her mouth, she glances back down the corridor. They're still there, seemingly unaware of her presence.
She wonders how it works. Don't faeries smell humans from miles away? That's the only explanation on how her captor found her the way he did. And she knows by what he said that he could, in fact, smell her like a piece of meat. But these guards haven't so much as glanced in her direction. ÂżMaybe not all faeries can sense humans?
She tries to make out pieces of what they're talking about. Their voices are the only sound in the hallway, so it's easy for her to listen. Perhap she can hear something useful, a hint to leave this place.
"...to leave. He's...bad mood."
"...prick. Almost worse...other."
"Waiting...company."
They chuckle. A sound so unnerving it makes her skin crawl.
"Vanserra...most dangerous."
Vanserra. A name. It means nothing to her, but they way they say it carries a certain air of authority. Whoever it is, it's someone they have to obey.
Her mind is running through multiple possibilities, strategies to proceed. She has to act now. Every minute she spends here without moving is more time for that monster to find her. She's not that foolish to think the iron poker in her hand will stop him.
Suddenly, the guards begin to move towards her and Nesta's blood runs cold. She turns, sprinting down another passageway, uncaring that they surely heard her now.
Sheâs running blind again, every hallway an endless stretch of pale stone and torchlight. Her mind flits back to the Fae chained in his bed, his rage as he realized what sheâd done. Sheâs not sure if sheâs more terrified of his revenge or the despair of knowing she might never escape this place. That it was all for nothing.
The hall narrows, and ahead, she catches a dim glimmer. She sprints toward it, pressing her hands against the wall. There's a slight fissure in the rock, opening onto a crudely carved, dark subterranean passageway. It's large enough for one person to squeeze throughâso jagged and rough that it's obviously not used often.
Itâs deathly silent, with a faint, warm breeze whistling through. The sound of footsteps and angry shouts approaching spurs her into action; she squeezes herself into a narrow opening, holding her breath to fit. She remains perfectly still as the guards pass her hiding spot. When their footsteps fade, she moves on. The iron rod scrapes against the stone, and she almost feels sorry for the high-quality fabric of the dress getting ruined. Almost.
The passageway narrows, forcing her to suck in her stomach to keep moving. The smell of burning wood reaches her nose, and distant soundsâvoicesâgrow clearer. Light seeps through cracks in the stone, giving her glimpses of the other side.
Bedrooms. This passageway connects to other faeâs bedrooms. She wants to scream.
Nesta closes her eyes for a moment, steeling herself. She canât fall apart now. She's already here. Turning back is not an option anymore. And she has to find Feyre.
She keeps moving. The voices fade, and her body bumps into a solid wall. The smell of burning wood is stronger now, drifting from just beyond it.
She presses her hands against the wall, pushing with all her strength until it slides aside. A hidden door, then. As soon as she steps out, it closes behind her.
Before her it's a magnificent bedroom, entirely different from the one she was locked in, yet equally beautiful.
The color scheme is rich in golds and reds, with warm orange hues. Another king-sized bed stands at the center, adorned with exquisite bed linens embroidered in flame-like patterns. The posts are made of real gold, and the fire blazing in the enormous hearth beside it casts an ethereal glow across the room. A large, intricately carved wardrobe stands nearby, its surface adorned with thorny patterns. A small desk is cluttered with scattered papers and books, yet looks as expensive as everything else.
If Nesta were asked to describe it, sheâd say this room is made of fire and fury. It radiates a palpable power, as though the very walls are steeped in the essence of whoever resides here. The heat from the fire makes her skin prickle, and a strange, welcome warmth settles over her, seeping into her bones.
She walks around slowly, eyes scanning for exits. She notes a large set of double doors to her rightâlikely the main entranceâand a smaller, inconspicuous door to the left. Her heartbeat quickens, calculating the odds.
But then she hears faint footsteps, muffled but approaching. Her gaze darts to the wardrobe, and without another thought, she darts toward it, slipping inside just as the door swings open. She presses herself against the back of the wardrobe, the scent of polished wood and faintly spiced cologne surrounding her. Through the crack between the doors, she watches.
A figure steps inside, tall and imposing, dressed in an elegant jacket of scarlet and gold. His movements are fluid, controlled. His gaze sweeps over the room, his expression sharp and focused, as if he senses something amiss.
Nesta holds her breath, willing herself invisible. She grips the iron poker with both hands, ready to pounce.
The Fae moves to the bed, then over to the fireplace, seemingly lost in thought. His fingers trail along the desk, tracing patterns on the scattered papers. And then, he turns on his back and leaves. The sound of doors closing resonate in the room.
Nesta waits until she's sure he's gone. She steps out of the wardrobe carefully, glancing in both directions. Her heart pounds so hard she can feel it in her throat.
Standing in the middle of the room, she watches the flames flicker. Their light reflects off her dress, casting an orange glow that transforms the fabric into the hues of a sunset rather than a night sky. She likes it better.
Suddenly, the flames sink in size and she barely has time to react before she feels a strong hand grabbing her by the arm, grip iron-clad.
"Well, well" a voice low and silk-smooth drawls in her ear, breath hot against her skin. "What do we have here? A little bird who..."
Nesta doesn't even think it.
She whips around and swings the poker, the sharp, burning end aimed blindly at him.
The iron rod connects, glancing off his arm before he jerks back with a low, furious hiss. She stumbles, nearly losing her grip on the poker, but she doesnât let go. Instead, she takes a shaky step back, holding it between them like a weapon. Her pulse pounds like thunder, her gaze locked on the Fae.
The flames leap higher in the fireplace as he steadies himself, one hand cradling his injured arm. His face twists, not in pain but in something sharper, colderâa kind of restrained fury that makes her blood run cold.
"Quite the little fighter, arenât you?" he says, his voice low and dripping with dark amusement, though his eyes burn with ire. "I assume you're not the female I was expecting tonight."
He speaks in a unfamiliar accent, different from the other Fae man she knows. His voice is rich and deep in a way that would be attractive in an human man, but coming from someone like him, Nesta refuses to feel anything.
Just by looking at him she knows heâs of the same statusâor closeâto her captor. Heâs taller than any man sheâs ever met, with dark red hair perfectly cut over his nape and amber eyes that resemble two flaming orbs. He's dressed even more elegantly than the other bastard, and Nesta has the knowledge to see he has a refined taste and takes pride in his appearance.
Not to mention she can practically feel the power thrumming off him, as palpable as the fireâs warmth at her back. This is no ordinary faeâheâs one of the important kind. The masters.
And this is his bedroom.
Nesta feels the urge to scream again.
He huffs, releasing his injured arm, and she catches sight of a thin trail of blood trickling down his elegantly stitched sleeve. Itâs a dark shade of redâalmost blackâa stark reminder that heâs not human, but a monster.
She holds the iron rod between them, keeping it firmly pressed against his chest, though she knows itâs futile. The sharp end digs in, and he raises an eyebrow, glancing from the poker to her with a look of faint bewilderment.
"Who are you?" it takes everything within her to keep her voice steady.
He snorts. "I believe I should be the one asking that, birdie. This is my bedroom."
Nesta bites her lips, her pulse beating in her ears. He doesn't look threatening, but that doesn't mean he's safe. Yet there's something oddly comforting about this room, about its aura. She can't explain it, but it just feels alluring to her. Just like the man in front of her.
'Focus, you idiot. He's not a man. He's a predator.'
She straightens her spine, trying to appear taller and more confident than she truly feels. Sheâs no fighter, despite the iron rod clenched in her fingers. Her weapons have always been her wordsâand she doesn't know to what extent they're useful against faeries.
The fae draws a twisted grin, his fire eyes gleaming with menace.
"How interesting," he takes a step closer to her, the iron pressing further into his chest. "I wasn't aware the Night court kept human pets now."
The fury that flares up at being called "pet" dims in confusion as she processes his words. ÂżNight Court? Is that where that fae of shadows comes from?
The red-haired fae picks up on her shock instantly, his grin widening as if heâs uncovered something amusing and entirely to his advantage.
"Oh?" he drawls, a hint of mockery in his voice. "Donât tell me you didnât even know? You're dressed like one of them. A wonder we haven't heard of you." He says the last part more to himself, as though sheâs little more than a spectator to his thoughts.
Nesta grits her teeth, keeping her grip on the poker tight. "I donât care about that. I only want to leave."
The faeâs expression shifts, some trace of real interest sparking in his eyes, though his amusement remains. "Leave? And where exactly would you go, little mortal? This place isnât exactly known for its... hospitality to uninvited guests. Specially if they're humans. She has a...let's say strong dislike for your kind."
He lifts his fingers to trace the iron rod lightly, as though inspecting it. "Besides, did no one tell you itâs rather rude to wander into another maleâs chambers?" His tone drips with sarcasm, but Nesta catches the veiled threat in his words.
She truly has the worst luck in the world. Jumping from one sick bastard to another. ÂżWhen will this end?
Nestaâs pulse races. She can feel the power simmering just beneath his polished exterior, as potent as the fae sheâs managed to escape from. Her hand tightens on the rod as she meets his gaze defiantly. "You didnât answer my question. Who are you?"
For a moment, he simply stares at her, the smirk fading as he watches her face with sharp, unreadable eyes. Then, he inclines his head in a graceful bow.
"Call me Eris," he says, voice low and almost purring. "And you, little bird?"
Nesta hesitates. Giving her name to a Fae is a horrible idea, or so she's been taught. But she also thought iron could hurt them and she saw her captor holding it with his own hands to chain her. She's not sure what to do.
But he's given her something more than the other male has. So maybe she can allow herself to be a bit nice.
"I'll tell you if you let me out of here," she replies after a beat, keeping her chin high.
Erisâs smile returns, smug and unbelieving, as if heâs found something truly valuable. "Seriously?" he repeats, letting a short huff of amusement. "I just gave you mine. It's not fair I don't get to know yours."
Her eyes narrow. "You could be lying to me for all I know. Some knowledge is dangerous in the wrong hands."
He stares at her. The corner of his mouth twitches.
"I agree," he clasps his hands behind him, leaning forward. The end of the poker cutting slightly through his exquisite jacket. He doesn't seem to care. "So pray tell, why should I let you leave after telling you my name, mhm? It's dangerous knowledge, after all."
She tenses.
"What could I possibly do against you? I'm just a human."
He takes a step closer to her.
"A human dressed like a member of the Night court, who just intruded in my bedroom with a weapon. Forgive me for being a bit skeptical."
His gaze never leaves hers, and though Nesta tries to keep her stance steady, she feels herself shrinking back involuntarily. His body is on the way to her exit, but it dawns to her that, even if she managed to get pass him by some miracle, there could be more faes outside.
She doesn't have time to think that far ahead. She needs to act now.
The fire cracks behind her, the comforting smell of burning wood caressing her nose. She can do this.
"Please, I just want to go home." Fighting back hasnât worked so far, so maybe playing the role of a pitiful, scared human will "He kidnapped me, kept me locked in his room like a beast. I escaped by sheer miracle, but I know he's looking for me now."
His eyebrows rise briefly, a flicker of surprise crossing his features before it vanishes, replaced by an unimpressed stare. If Nesta wasn't so well versed in those same tactics, she would've missed it.
She knows Fae look down on her kind, see them as inferior beings. If she plays on that role, she might get the upper hand here.
Eris watches her, the flickering firelight casting his sharp features in a golden glow. His smirk fades and his eyes narrow slightly, as though heâs debating whether or not to believe her tale.
"How exactly did you escape? I know he wouldn't have let you go so easily. And there's no way you could've overpower him."
Shit. Heâs cornering her with that question. If she tells him the truthâthat she outwitted a powerful fae and chained him to the bedâthereâs a risk heâll see her as a genuine threat and act accordingly. Or worse, he wonât believe her at all. And hand her over to her captor.
Everything's been a risk since she got out of that room. She can't falter. Not now. Not when might be so close to freedom.
"When his servants came to dress me, they unlocked the chain, and forgot to lock it again when they left. I saw an opportunity. I grabbed the poker and ran away before he returned." she sighs. "I almost got caught by some guards, so I hid. That's how I ended up here."
He hums, looking at her in silence, as if pushing her to continue.
"Please, I beg you, let me go. My s...family need me. I must find them. I promise I won't tell anyone about this place. Ever. I just...let me go home."
As she talks, she realizes it's not an act anymore. Every word comes straight out of her heart, her raw emotions. She misses her home deeply, misses her sisters. She must save Feyre from that monster's claws and bring her back home. Her eyes grow misty against her will, but she's too weary to feel asshamed.
She only wants this nightmare to end.
The fae doesn't say anything. Not a sound comes out of him. Nesta doesn't dare to look at his face.
"Home, you say?" His voice drips with an emotion she can't identify. "You really think that's an option for you now? That's why you went through all that trouble? Sweet Mother, I forgot how blissfully unaware mortals are of everything around them." He looks away, his expression serious, contrasting greatly to how he's been acting until now. "And what, pray tell, is it you intend to do once youâre back in your quaint little life? Forget this ever happened? Forget this place? Him?" His tone lowers, his words taunting. "Do you truly believe a creature like him will let you escape unscathed?"
Nesta's blood freezes, her head throbbing. The grip around the iron rod begins to tremble.
"There must be a way, I know it..."
"Let's suppose I let you out of here. What then?" he interrupts her, insisting. Taking her apart. "Do you have any idea where you are right now? How to navigate this place? You don't. Bet you don't even know where the entrance is. You don't have a plan, am I right? Risked your sorry life for nothing."
Nesta moves before her common sense can't stop it. She swings the iron rod again, narrowly missing his side as he sidesteps.
Eris laughs, a sharp, delighted sound, even as he raises his hands in mock surrender. "Oh, you're fun. I like you."
"Shut up. You're a powerful fae, I can feel it. There has to be a way you can help me here. What do I have to do?"
Erisâs smile returns, smug and predatory, as if heâs found what he was looking for.
"Well, I can think of a few ways you can...persuade me to help."
Nesta already recognizes this tone, resisting the urge to roll her eyes and the shiver all through her back. Maybe she should try to aim for the head this time.
"Not that, you disgusting pervert." She grits her teeth.
Eris hums, his expression unreadable as he steps even closer, close enough now that the heat of his body mixes with the warmth of the fire behind her. "How brave of you to say that. Or just suicidal. I can't decide."
Nesta holds her ground, though her instincts scream at her to back away. She wonât cowerânot yet. She tilts her chin up, meeting his fiery gaze head-on. "I repeat. Iâm no threat to you. If you're not going to help me, then let me go, and you wonât have to deal with me ever again."
Eris laughs, low and rich, the sound reverberating through the room and her body. "You misunderstand, birdie. I donât 'have' to deal with you. Iâm choosing to."
His hand reaches out, catching her wrist with infuriating ease as he gently pulls the poker from her grip. He lets it clatter to the ground, his hand still wrapped around her wrist, firm but not painful. "And now Iâm wonderingâŚ" He leans in, close enough that she can feel the heat radiating off him. "Why the High Lord of the Night Court went to such lengths to dress you up like his prize, only to let you slip away."
Her pulse pounds in her ears, but she forces her voice steady. "Iâm no oneâs prize."
Erisâs lips twitch, his grip tightening just slightly. "No, youâre not. You're a pet." he murmurs. "But I think there's something more of you than that. And I really want to find out."
His free hand raises toward her face, and Nesta reacts without thinking. She stomps down on his foot with all her strength, yanking her wrist free as his grip loosens.
But before she can grab the iron rod again, his whole face changes. Itâs almost imperceptible, but she notices it, and it makes her wary.
He tilts his head to the side, as if listening to something outside. She watches him, his sudden change in behavior unsettling her enough to keep quiet. The faint tension in his posture, the way his eyes flicker toward the door, and the tilt of his head, as if straining to hear something beyond the thick walls. It sets her on edge.
Her heart pounds in her chest, the icy claws of unease curling around her spine. Whateverâor whoeverâhas his attention, it makes him pause. And that, more than anything, terrifies her.
A cold, horrifying though comes to her. ÂżCould it be him? Has he found her at last?
Suddenly, he turns his head at her with an intense stare. Something flicker in his eyes, and he's frowning. He looks at her as if he's conflicted. ÂżWhy?
He grabs her harshly by the arms, but not enough to hurt, and basically lifts her up in the air. She doesn't have time to protest before he presses a hand against the wall where she came from and...pushes it open like nothing. Like he does it regularly.
He shoves her inside and gives her a stern look of warning.
"Leave the way you came," he instructs, his tone firm but distracted. "Once you're out, keep your right hand pressed to the wall and follow it. Itâll take you where you need to go. Donât run, donât make a sound, and above all, avoid the shadows. Theyâre not safe." He turns his head to the door again in a pissed off gesture. "And one more thing."
He grabs her wrist, and Nesta feels the cool weight of something pressed into her palm. She looks down.
A knife. Crafted from gold and ash wood.
"That will hurt a Fae far more than burning iron," he says evenly. "Keep it with you at all times. Even a light touch of it will have them writhing in pain."
She can barely process what's happening. Everything feels too fast, his words too cryptic.
"Why are you doing this? What's going on?"
The glare he shoots her makes her breath hitch.
"He's here."
Her chest tightens as her heartbeat thunders painfully against her ribs, each beat like a desperate plea to escape.
"But... I donât understand. Why are you telling me this? Why are you helping me?"
He stares at her, his expression unreadable, though something flickers in his eyesâa shadow of emotion too fleeting to name.
"Weâre not close enough yet to share our secrets," he says, his smile sharp but empty, like a blade with no warmth behind it. "Now go, before I regret it and hand you over to him."
Her mind spins, a storm of unanswered questions she canât bring herself to voice. Her tongue feels heavy, her thoughts muddled.
But one thing is unmistakable: heâs helping her. For reasons she canât fathom, this Fae is offering her a chance. A lifeline. And he hasnât demanded anything in return.
Before she can say another word, he moves to push the wall closed.
"Pity. I didn't got your name in the end," he says, letting out a dramatic sigh. "Maybe next time."
It's so absurd she feels the urge to chuckle. For the first time since she was kidnapped. It's a miracle. Or a sign of insanity.
"Nesta."
"What?"
She locks eyes with him, her gaze unwavering as she stares into those amber depths, like molten fire swirling. Her own reflection in those fiery orbs.
"My name is Nesta."
He blinks.
"Nesta." He repeats, savouring the syllabes in a soft, low tone. "Be careful, Nesta. Everything can be trap here."
She grips the knife.
"Trust me, I know now" she replies. "Thank you. For doing this."
He chuckles.
"Don't thank me yet, birdie. After all, I'm sure we'll meet again."
The wall closes in her face before she can ask, leaving her alone in the darkness once more.
She battles with herself to get moving, her mind still reeling from everything that just transpired. Pressing her right hand firmly against the wall beside her, she begins to walk back on her steps.
Every step is deliberate, her movements slow and calculated, as she struggles to keep silent. Her breathing is shallow, her chest tight with the effort of not making a sound.
If that bastard truly is here, then thereâs a chanceâpretty big oneâthat she'll pass by him through this hidden passage, near the damn rooms.
The weight of the knife in her hand is both a comfort and a reminder of the dangers that lie ahead. Nesta moves cautiously, every small sound amplified in the thick silence surrounding her. Her heart hammers in her chest, a constant warning of how close she is to being discovered. The passage feels tighter now, the stone walls pressing in as if the space itself is conspiring to trap her.
As she walks, her mind races. Who was that fae, Eris? Why had he helped her? And why, despite the sharpness in his eyes and the veiled threat in his words, had he let her go instead of handing her over to the other? Surely it would've been easier for him, and spared him any trouble.
Her breath catches in her throat as a thought hits her like a cold waveâwas he playing her all along? Or was there something more to his intentions?
The wall beneath her fingers feels cold, unyielding, as if daring her to falter. She forces herself to ignore the creeping dread, pressing onward, trusting in the directions Eris had given her. The passage twists and turns, its walls narrowing at times, forcing her to squeeze through with minimal room to spare. She forces her thoughts back to the present. 'Focus. Get out of here. Find Feyre.'
The low murmur of voices reaches her ears just as she rounds a corner. Her stomach tightens. Theyâre closeâtoo close for her liking. She slows her pace, flattening herself against the wall as much as she can, holding her breath. Her eyes scan the shadows, looking for any sign of movement.
The voices grow louder, unmistakable now. Itâs him. The one sheâs been running from.
"Sorry, but I don't have the slighest idea what you're talking about," That's Eris. She recognizes that suave, arrogant tone. "Are you sure you're not just tired? I know she's been keeping you busy lately..."
"Spare me your bullshit, Vanserra," her tormentor growls, and Nesta's heart stops at how close he sounds. "I can smell her here. Where.Is.She?"
Hold on. Vanserra? Did he just call Eris 'Vanserra'?
'Vanserra...most dangerous.'
'...prick. Almost worse...other.'
'Waiting...company.'
ÂżWhat was it he said when he saw her?
'I assume you're not the female I was expecting tonight'
Her knees threaten to give out, her breath growing heavy and clawing at her chest. In her desesperation to escape from a monster, she jumped into another one. And made him bleed.
She truly, definitely, has the worst luck in this godsforsaken world.
But he also let her leave. Even gave her a weapon to defend herself against his kind, or so he claimed. So what's the truth here? Why are these creatures so dreadfully confusing?
"Who exactly is 'her'? I don't understand...Oh!" He chuckles mockingly, in that taunting way of this. "Are you hiding something from us, Rhys? It must be pretty important if our queen doesn't know yet."
"I'm warning you, Eris, I'm losing my patience here. Tell me where the fuck she is now, or you can say goodbye to you and your miserable family before tomorrow."
Her pulse quickens again. Itâs really himâher captor, the shadowed fae who had claimed her as his. His voice is unmistakable, even though heâs out of sight. Nestaâs stomach lurches with the realization that sheâs within inches of him, and the thought of what he might do if he catches her sends a shiver down her spine.
Keep moving, she tells herself. Donât stop. Ignore them.
But it's hard to do so when they're so close to her, specially the moment Eris replies.
"Keep my family out of our filthy mouth." It shocks her how deadly serious he sounds. How threatening. "They have nothing to do with your personal messes. If I were you, I'll be more worried about Amarantha finding out. I wonder what she'll think of her whore keeping an human pet under her nose, without her permission?
Whore? Amarantha?
Suddenly, there's a loud bang and she has to bite her lip to not scream.
Someone punched a wall, cracked a hole in it probably. She can hear some heavy breathing, but can't tell whose.
"I'm sick of your games, Vanserra." It's him. "I don't like when people tamper with my things. Tell me where you hid her, or I'll fucking slit your throat right here. How would your mother fare mourning another son?"
Nesta takes another step, but her foot catches on somethingâa loose stone, a crack in the floor. The faint sound is enough to make her freeze, her breath caught in her throat. The voices stop. The air becomes thick with tension, and the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. She closes her eyes, praying she hasnât been heard.
Seconds stretch into eternity.
Then, a faint shuffle of feet.
She presses herself further against the stone, her heart racing, praying to whatever gods might listen that sheâs not discovered. She waits, breath held, her fingers tightening around the golden knife. The faintest tremor runs through her as she imagines what would happen if the shadows, that dark fae that had haunted her every step, found her now.
Her breath escapes in a silent rush, and she forces herself to keep going, her movements fluid but swift. Just a little further. Just a little further. She has move away from them. Far enough to give her some advantage by the time he comes out to get her. Whatever farse Eris had been spouting to distract him is over with her mistake.
Her mind is racing as the path stretches ahead of herâthereâs no going back now. Sheâs committed herself to whatever happens next. The knife feels cold in her hand, despite having been there for quite a while now.
The voices resume, softer now, but she can no longer understand them. She takes it as a good sign.
The passage winds on, the flickering lights from the cracks that guided her earlier growing faint and distant. Nestaâs pulse thunders in her ears as she moves, every nerve in her body attuned to the faintest shift in sound or shadow. She keeps her right hand on the wall, gripping the knife in her left. Erisâs instructions echo in her mind: Follow the wall. Donât run. Donât make a sound. Avoid the shadows.
She tries not to think about how close she came to being caughtâor how the bastard wouldâve reacted if heâd seen her. His threats, his furyâit all feels like a dark storm closing in, and sheâs only barely staying ahead of it.
The air grows colder as she moves deeper into the passage, and she shivers despite herself. Her dress feels flimsy and useless against the chill. The fabric whispers against her legs as she walks, the only sound she allows herself to make.
She misses the fire and the wood from Eris' bedroom. She's going insane, no doubt, missing to be in a Fae's presence.
Nesta rounds another corner, her steps faltering as the walls widen slightly. The space feels different hereâemptier, less confining. She presses her hand more firmly against the stone, willing herself to keep going. She doesnât know where this path leads, but itâs better than staying where she was.
A faint, eerie hum creeps into her awareness. Itâs distant, almost like a melody carried on the wind, and she freezes. Her breathing stills as she listens, trying to pinpoint the sound. It doesnât seem like voices, nor does it belong to any creature she can identify. It's almost hypnotic...except she doesn't feel particularly drawn to it. More like weirded out, scared even. It wants to pull her attention, she knows, and she feels how it flies past her body. Her eyes squint around her, trying to see something.
Avoid the shadows, he said.
How is she supposed to avoid them if she's surrounded by them?
Nesta steps back instinctively, her grip tightening on the knife. She scans the dim passage, her eyes straining to see through the gloom. The hum grows louder, closer, and she realizes itâs not coming from one direction but all around her, as if the passage itself is alive and aware.
Her breath catches as a flicker of movement darts just beyond her visionâa shadow, but not her own. Her blood runs cold, and she takes another step back, pressing herself against the wall.
"Not safe," she whispers to herself, repeating his warning like a mantra. "Not safe. Not safe."
The hum crescendos, a low, thrumming sound that resonates in her chest, and the shadows seem to swell, stretching toward her. Panic claws at her throat, but Nesta forces herself to move, keeping her steps deliberate and quiet. She doesnât dare look back, doesnât dare think about what might be lurking just out of sight.
The wall beneath her hand feels warmer now, as though guiding her toward somethingâaway from the terrifying darkness. She follows it blindly, her focus narrowing to the rough texture beneath her fingertips and the steady rhythm of her steps.
Finally, she sees it: a faint glimmer of light ahead, spilling through the cracks of what looks like another possible exit. Relief floods her, but she doesnât let herself rush. Instead, she inches closer, every muscle coiled and ready to act if somethingâor someoneâappears.
When she reaches the door, she feels along its edges, noticing a soft breeze coming from the other side. Her fingers brush against a hidden latch, and she hesitates, glancing back over her shoulder. She can see the shadows writhe in the distance, alive and hungry, and she knows she has no choice.
Nesta pushes the latch, and the wall swings open, revealing a room bathed in warm light. She steps through, the wall closing shut behind her with a quiet click. The hum vanishes abruptly, leaving an oppressive silence in its wake.
Itâs a small, empty space, furnished only with a worn-out desk and an old chair, a few cushions tossed carelessly on the ground, and a dusty bookshelf leaning against the wall. The thick layer of dust suggests it hasnât been used in quite some timeâor that no one cares enough to clean it.
She hears nothing but her own breathing. No footsteps, no voices, no hums. The room feels abandoned.
For now, sheâs safe.
As if on cue, her knees give out, and she collapses to the ground. The knife slips from her grasp, clattering loudly against the floor beside her open hand. Her shoulders tremble as her vision blurs with unshed tears. The adrenaline that had kept her upright is gone, leaving her raw and vulnerable. Everythingâthe danger, the fear, the weight of survivalâcrashes over her all at once.
Nesta hugs herself tightly, pulling her legs to her chest and burying her face in her knees. For a moment, she lets herself break.
Now it's not the time, a voice eerily similar to her Mother's echoe in her head. Focus. Get out of here. Find Feyre.
Nesta takes a long, deep breath, looking up again. She casts a glance to the knife besides her and grabs it. She scans her surroundings again, making sure she didn't miss anything. The knife somehow comforts her, her heart going back to its normal rhythm as her finger traces the ashwood part.
She doesnât know what more dangers she'll have to face, but sheâll find a way out of this nightmareâback to her sisterâor die trying.
She's Nesta Archeron. And she won't break.
#acosab#acotar#acotar au#a court of shadows and blood#i had a struggle deciding where to end this chapter#but i think this is perfect for the next part#i had some doubts in this one but i think it turned out better than i expected#which it isn't much lmao#hope you all like it#still deciding if next chapter should be from rhysand's pov or nesta's#also notice how he haven't yet heard rhysand's name as such by any character? there's a reason for that that i have in mind#it's a struggle to not have anyone call him rhysand or rhys when talking to him#but trust me there's a specific reason for it#plot related#nesta is not a warrior like feyre so i try to show how differently she acts upon these situations#i don't know if i'm doing it right#anyway here goes nothing#rhysand#nesta archeron#pro nesta archeron#everything i write is pro nesta#rhysta#we need more of these two and i'm sick of waiting so i'm doing it myself#eris vanserra#surprise surprise#if you follow me you know i love this man too much#ofc he had to appear sooner or later#enjoy!!
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I like to think that Vulcans who come to understand that Humans just canât try to process emotions the same way as them, itâs just healthiest to let it out in harmless ways, decide that venting and stuff should be taken just as seriously as Vulcanâs meditation time, and will encourage the Humans around them to complain about whatâs upsetting them
People who are used to aloof Vulcans who avoid Humans at all cost running into one comforting a Human
â-and then they said my cheesecake was subpar, and they didnât even bring a dish!!!â
âThe purpose of this event was that every participant brings a food item of sorts, correct?â
âYeah!!â
âAnd they did not follow this rule while insulting dishes that were brought?â
âMostly just my dish but yeah >:(â
âHow illogicalâ
âThatâs what Iâm saying!!!â
#star trek#Vulcans#Humans#not based on a specific thing#but I used to know this annoying couple that were âfamily friendsâ#who would show up to potluck dinners and the like and would either bring nothing or bring something really just. out of left field?#like a bag of frozen chicken to a bbq#and then proceed to make sure they are first even if it was stated to let kids go first#would take HUGE amounts before anyone else got a chance to get a plate#and then make off with the leftovers again even if they were already claimed for#and it wasnât a food insecurity thing trust me I would never speak bad about a person getting food if that was even a remote chance#the adults who raised us knew them really well and weâd been to their house a ton of times#they were just dicks#and yeah. theyâd occasionally insult the food. while eating the MAJORITY of it.#it was so weird at their home they would go out of their way to get the healthiest options possible#you know the really bland tasteless expensive stuff that apparently was healthier#but then if they were visiting our house they would. eat all our unhealthy snacks.#that always pissed me off so much as a kid because we actually had a food insecurity thing going on#and also a variety of other reasons that are a bit too depressing to bring up on this post#but anyways weâd hardly ever get to have nice snacks#and this couple would just take them all??? even after weâd tell them repeatedly that it was ours and those snacks werenât gonna be#replaced#hated that couple#if youâre wondering why they were âfamily friendsâ itâs because the couple who raised us#(it feels weird to type it out like that but apparently legal guardians doesnât fit since they never finished petitioning đ)#liked having them around because it made them look like âsuch great Christianâsâ being nice to the people#that no one else wanted to be friends with#I always thought that was a really weird and fucked up reason to be friends with someone#this got long sorry đ
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i've had these scenarios written down since volo's debut in pokemon masters and i just really wanted to scribble them down and finally release them
#pokemon#volo#pokemon volo#pokemon jacq#n harmonia#pokemon rei#trainer rei#clai's art#trying to write n's specific brand of being mean is hard to me for some reason#in the initial idea i had him outright call volo stupid but i didnt know if that was too far so i just took it out BJFBFJF#but anyway volo being a historian who had to have studied many walks of life but has still come to the conclusion that the world is hopeless#jacq being someone who's very positive and sees the best in people even if they are very much not great to him (see: raifort)#finally realizing someone he knows is like. inexcusably horrible#n's situation wasn't even that different from volo's. both saw injustice in society and sought to change it#but even n. who hated humanity for what he thought they were all responsible for. didnt want humans to Die for what they did!!#and rei. rei was a scared kid who saw the very worst of volo firsthand. rei needed friends and one of them despised him in the end#isnt it soooo funny how volo thinks he's alone yet keeps pushing away all the people who want to connect with him :) i hate pla so much :)))#as another note too. perhaps the rei thing could end in two ways#satisfying good ending where it kicks off volo's realization that hey maybe people do trust me unconditionally#or no good bad ending where volo takes this as another betrayal. rei only liked him for his facade like everyone else so why does it matter#volo almost makes me feel as ill as n does. hate this stupid guy i shouldnt have bought pla for my birthday i should have gotten. p/kmin idk
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RULES OF BEING OTHERKIN #1
Being authentic and true to yourself is the only way you are 'supposed to be/act like' (insert entity). If anyone else disagrees it only tells you about them.
#going to start a small 'series' where I document stuff I learn that is otherkin specific. This is for myself as well as anyone who might#be struggling with things I used to/am working on(otherkin specific). hopefully this will reduce any mental pitfalls other otherkin may#fall into as they explore their identity and help out someone.#this 'rule' took a LONG time to fully understand and grasp. for the longest time I would consciously or subconsciously#think I was less Loki if I did or was something 'Loki would never do. until i realized I do exactly and experience exactly what Loki does#and experiences because...Im literally Loki. (talking about incarnations here). I felt pressured to be a certain way because 'Loki would#never (insert). being aroace is on of them. i tried to convince myself I wasn't aroace#and when I finally ran out of reasons i felt i was 'less Loki' because mythologically hes like the opposite. but Loki IS aroace. because#Im Loki. and Im aroace. so loki is SUPPOSED to be aroace because Im loki and im being exactly how loki is being. because im loki. being#myself. therefore being exactly like Loki. again - incarnation.#anyway....if anyone else struggles with this I hope this helps someone. its a really sucky place to be in honestly.#godkin#deitykin#alterhuman#otherkin#divinekin#nonhuman#alterbeing#therian#I think I will be learning a LOT more as I keep exploring and I will note down any 'rules' I learn - more like lessons but rules personally#sound more right for me. rules i will live by (yknow unless i find out im wrong but...im going to trust myself more and right now i feel#like this rule is true. so im using it as such unless i find out im wrong in future.
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