#but this shit ATE
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best. mark rap. EVER.
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pov your leg gives out randomly throughout the day
#my art#fishfingersandscarves#arcane#viktor arcane#jayvik sorta if u look at it sideways#doodle#as a cane user it is my gd given right to project my shit onto viktor arcane especially since this happened yesterday and i almost ate shit
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i’m sorry boss I can’t come into work tomorrow they’ve identified the remains of a doomed polar explorer
#they’ve found?????? James fitzjames?????????? holy shit?????????#they’ve found him???????????????#and they ate him?????#I need to lie down#link to article in replies#the terror#the Franklin expedition
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mel after she pops up with a cooler design and cool ass powers and kills her mom. Only to discover her man absconded w his man into the ether
#arcane#mel arcane#i love mel medarda so much#i hope she pops out w a big ass butch in the spinoff#she deserves to get her shit ate expeditiously#shes going to be stressed too so#jayvik
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Tim walking into the dining room: Oh B, i just realized, happy 5 years sober, I am really proud of you.
Bruce, small smile and sipping his tea: Thank you Tim.
Dick, looking up confused from his bowl of cereal: What? Sober? Weren't you drinking last night at the gala?
Bruce, brows furrowed: Not from alcohol, Chum.
Tim, after downing his cup of coffee: Damn you didn't know? It was cocain. B was on that booger sugar.
Bruce, making a face: Please, never call it that again.
Dick, after his brain rebooted: You...you did cocain?
Bruce sighing :Yes I did...I though you knew.
Dick, abandoning his bowl of cereal: No, no I very much didn't! How did you...like get into that?
Tim: Dick take it down a notch, please? Bruce has been clean for years.
Bruce, shaking his head: It's fine Tim, I should have been more up front with this to the others.
Dick, with his head tilted and still a bit upset: Others? You mean only Tim knew?
Bruce, nodding: He caught me taking a key from one of Penguins supply when he was Robin and forced me to confess, I went to rehab a week later.
Dick, sitting back down in a stupor: Wait...You mean the thing when you were gone for like a few months? I thought you were on a deep space mission with the league! Hell, Uncle Clark even said so!
Bruce, wincing: Y-Yes...I was in a treatment center in Sweden...Tim found them and signed me up without telling me, and had Clark take me there...
Bruce side eyeing Tim: Took my Kryptonite before doing so...and my stash.
Tim, unapologetic, shrugging: Mom used the same place when she was getting off of Quaaludes.
Bruce, shrunching his nose: Never did like downers, made it harder to think.
Dick, having a mental breakdown: So you just...did drugs? For like a while? When did this even start?
Bruce, silent for a while, moving his breakfast around for a moment: It started when I was about...16? When I was in the club scene for a bit I got wild, taking pills and such that I didn't need, it was the 80s, blow was all the rage with the youth in higher circles and...well one thing lead to another and I got hooked.
Dick, holding his head in his hands: Oh my God...Wait.. Were you actively doing drugs when you adopted me???
Bruce, groaning: Yes...Didn't it ever seem strange that sometimes I was very lively and then suddenly was practically dead an hour later before getting back to lively?
Dick, horror coming across his face: Oh my God the signs...
Tim, chuckling: B was a God damn drug fiend, practically snorted half of Columbia.
Bruce, looking scandalized: Tim! I was not that bad...
Tim staring at Bruce:
Bruce staring back:
Bruce, sighing: Fine yes it was that bad.
Dick: uninhorant screeching
Bruce, tsking: I quit a few years after taking you in Chum, I only relapsed when Jason...temporarily passed...and that was only for at most a year, Tim found me out, sent me to rehab and while I have had a few scares, I have been sober for years.
Dick: Happy for you, really but holy fuck.
Tim, snorting: It wasn't the first time I caught you B, imagine little old 10 year old me following Batman and Robin and stumbling across the Dark Knight of Gotham doing a line on a gargoyle while Robin beat the shit out of the dealers below.
Dick, agape: Really Bruce? Do you even remember that?
Bruce, Blushing: i...may have done that more than once...
Dick, crying on the inside: BRUCE?!
Jason, walking in with a smoothie: Oh what are we yelling at B for? I want in.
Dick, wildly pointing at Bruce: BATMAN DID COCAIN.
Jason, slowly taking a drag from his smoothie, before turning to Bruce: w h a t?
Bruce, hiding his face in his hands, sullenly: I trained you all better than this. Yes I did drugs, I am 5 years sober.
Jason, softly putting his smoothie down before walking over to Bruce and patting his shoulder: Proud of you for that, like actually good job, holy shit that is hard. But also WHAT THE FUCK.
Bruce, sighing hard: I thought you all knew...
Jason flopping down in a chair, counting on his fingers: Wait a God damn minute, you got on my case for smoking while doing cocain!
Bruce, dead panned: it's a gate way to much harder things.
Jason, squinting: Who are you D.A.R.E?
Tim, cackling: he was! Did a whole speech about it! Full Batman regalia and was talking about how weed is bad!
Bruce glaring lightly at Tim: It is! It can cause lung damage, a build up of black tar in the lungs and can dull your mind when you are in a tike of crisis!
Jason, rolling his eyes: B, Shut the fuck up you did cocain.
Bruce, sighing yet again: You really are not letting that go are you...
Tim, sipping his coffee: Think of it like this, there is a reason B was able to get back to fighting like a week after Bane broke his back.
Bruce, pursing his lips,: Not the time Tim.
Tim, grinning evilly: Oh no, it is very much the time, I have been waiting till the others knew...I have so many blackmail stories....and pictures
Bruce, a look of true fear on his face: Oh God no...
#batfam#batman#jason todd#tim drake#bruce wayne#dick grayson#bruce did so many drugs#out of character.#so fucking ooc#cocain batman is my pride and joy#that man needed to be high as balls to do the shit he does#also thr imagine of Bruce just doing a line ofg a gargoyle is hilarious to me#bruce was a wild child during the 80s#he did at least a little drugs#he and harvey once ate shrooms and had a whole trip thinking they were jellyfish#coke fiend batman can sniff the air and know what the criminals were cooking
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#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayvik#arcane#arcane season 2#text posts#Viktor grabbing Jayce’s hand: If I eat shit You eat shit. Equality.#Jayce: We’re both disabled Viktor…#Viktor: hush Jayce#Viktor grabbing Jayce’s hand: /Our/ possible serious injury because we ate shit#they’re t4t to me btw#I love you Jayce Talis the canonical necromancer that you are#in my heart Jayce is the cook#I just know that that’s one of his love languages
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this will be living in my head rent free from now on
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Can you imagine those fucking trillionaires waking up from cryo in their fancy ships, finding out it's been 10,000 years, all happy and smug cause everything must be fixed now, that annoying cult leader is long dead, they can go back to earth and re-build society in their image while living in luxury ect ect
Only to find the galaxy in disaster mode, billions of refugees on displaced planets because their planets died, giant creepy beasts eating entire worlds, crazy death wizard people ruling most of the galaxy. All lead by the Supreme Emperor Necrolord Prime God whatever. Who is that annoying cult leader. Who HATES YOU.
#i know i think they wouldve woken up#and died by now#im not sure#but it would be funny#can you imagine that shit#this one guy hated you so much he ate the solar system and became god#nona the ninth#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#the locked tomb#tlt#the locked tomb spoilers#spoilers#john gaius#jod
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Got the brace off my ankle from the moose incident in October, had two weeks of normal mobility...
And sprained the fuck out of the other one .
#yard gate blew open and dogs got out#i panicked and ate shit on the concrete patio#they immediately came running when i started screaming tho#theyre fine#i am extremely ouchy
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Actually the worst part about having sex with Ghost is that once you get used to his fingers you can't come without them, and every time you text him he just goes, "need it again already, huh?"
#cod x reader#x reader#simon ghost riley#ghost mw2#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon riley#ghost call of duty#ghost cod#i absolutely ate shit on the garage staors going into for just now#and someone saw#and they were genuinely concerned if i was ok#honestly just glad i didnt break my nose on the concrete
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RIP Maria Thorpe you would’ve loved Chappell Roan
#assassin’s creed#maria thorpe#altaïr ibn la'ahad#ac1#chappell roan#shitpost#did y’all see the VMA performance#ate that shit up fr fr#she even had a crossbow which is what kills you in that mission if Maria doesn’t kill you herself#love to see it#I think I’m funny okay#I just need you guys to pretend
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Day 16: Forbidden (frosting)
#inktobertale2024#actually forbidden frosting#HAVE YOU SEEN HEAVY TEXTURE ACRYLIC PAINT?????#THAT STUFF LOOKS LIKE FROSTING#like no joke id eat that by accident if it didnt smell like paint#look it up#look up heavy texture acrylic paint and tell me you wouldnt eat that#its impossible#i think ink would eat the shit outta that no lie#hed stash tubs of it around his house so he has easy access to a quick snack#imagine if error came in and saw a sandwich with brown acrylic spread on bread#and he was hungry so he quickly ate it and spat it out after the paint taste hit him#brown acrylic paint looks like nutella#anyway im done yapping#ink sans#traditional#digitally colored and edited tho#lineart done with a dip pen
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Pray for him chat 🙏 I don’t think he can do it
Commission for @bitbot360 !
#mf pogo stick 😭#Funfact I only tried to use one of these one time#I too- ate shit#tadc#the amazing digital circus#kinger#tadc kinger
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give up on yourself, and you give up on the world
#says the guy who most likely killed himself#twewy#my art#doodles#kiryu joshua#the world ends with you#gave up on himself and the living world….better in the UG#then gave up on himself ever changing and wanting to destroy shibuya….#bro u r like the LAST person allowed to say that#my insane cope interpretation is at the end#his opinion of shibuya changes but not his opinion of himself. he thinks neku could do better#neku doing a 180 and trusting joshua soooo much shows joshua he could change even a little bit#theres hope for his change and thus shibuya changes with him#anyway! crazy shit for a suicidal guy to say#PLEASE CLICK FOR QUALITY. holy shit. tumblr ate it
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I mowed him sorry (← guy who thinks buzzed heads are handsome)
#one piece#roronoa zoro#baseball player-lookin head.....#descriptions in alt text#was talking with a friend about this and we decided ace went thru a stage of hating hair cuts/brushing as a kid#so when it got too tangled dadan would just shave it all off for him bc it was less uncomfortable in the long run#and luffy now has a cain instinct to slap the shit out of any bald head he sees#which is bad bc now he's a million times stronger so zoro nearly got OHKO'd#don't worry he ate a handful of walnuts and recovered (they're good for the brain)
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i have a lot of art i owe but i havent posted (art) in a bit
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