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idontplaytrack · 27 days ago

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You're the best of me

Janis ‘Imi’ike x Regina George

Warnings: fluff, mentions to age regression + Regina & Janis’ past

Part 2 of ‘Save Me(I’m fine)’

“I wish we could re-write the end There's a couple of things we left unsaid

You were in my arms, the world disappeared But tell me now through the tears

If I were to die, would you lay next to me? If these are my last words then baby, you're the best of me.”

“Hey, you!” Janis smiled brightly at the sight of the blonde.

“Hi, babe.” Regina mirrors the artist’s smile, pulling her in by the waist to give her a kiss.

“Hi, Janis.” Gretchen and Karen greet in unison. Gretchen arranged the books and things in her locker and shut the door. “How was your weekend?” Gretchen asked as they all began walking toward their homerooms. “Uh, not too interesting. We went to the mall, but then she got back pain again so Sunday was just…chill.”

“Oh. Is it any better?”

“I can walk around now.” Regina shrugged, “Which is great because otherwise I’d be home and stuck to my bed.”

“Did you take the pills though? They help right?” Karen glanced at the blonde.

“I did.” Regina answered, brows raised for a beat, “They barely take the edge off honestly. But I get by.”

“Don’t you have the one that’s very strong?” Gretchen asked, confused.

“I feel too out of it with that one. Hate how I feel all nauseous and groggy.”

The first half of the day went by in a breeze. Why? Regina and Janis were both looking forward to each class because they were counting down to the ones where they got to see each other. Funny how they used to dread those because of what happened, but things were different now. But so great. They were back to how they were meant to be like. Best friends— more than that, actually.

When lunch rolled around, Regina immediately made a beeline for the lunch queue. She was feeling pretty hungry, now that her pain’s been at bay for the last few hours thanks to her medication. Janis was right behind her, then Karen and Gretchen. Damian spotted them standing together in line and squinted at them.

“What are you looking at?” Janis laughs as she walked up to Damian and set her tray down.

“At you, standing right behind Regina.” Damian stabs his food with the fork, eating a mouthful.

“I told you, we talked everything out.” Janis explained, “We’re fine now.”

“Really? You were serious.”

“Dude, come on. I’ve no use lying to you.” Janis sighs, “Seriously. We’re— fine…”

“M’kay.” Damian shrugs, brow raised in suspicion. “But I mean, she hurt you terribly, my friend.”

“Sure. It’s happened already and nothing’s going to change that fact, but we grew up. We really just talked about every single thing that went wrong, why it bothered me so much, or why she did what she did…you know? Most importantly, she apologised and I know she’s not going to do that again.”

“If you say so.” Damian nodded, still a little unconvinced but he wasn’t going to complain, seeing how happy she was now.

“Damian. I’m okay.” Janis assured, “More than okay. She doesn’t hate my guts anymore, and I don’t hate her.”

“I heard you.” Damian shrugs, “Just trying to process it all. Also— I have not hung out with you at all after school for the last two weeks.”

“Art.” Janis answered simply, shoving a mouthful of mashed potatoes into her mouth to avoid the question. “You…wanna hang out today? How about we go grab a drink or something at our usual place after school?”

“I would love that. Though I hope you’re not stressing yourself out with the artwork. You need to chill out sometimes and take a break, girl.”

“Well, I do my best.” Janis shrugs, “Sometimes I just…forget to eat.”

“Or drink, or sleep. Or even just stand up and walk around a little.” Damian teased. “Janis, seriously. You worry me sometimes.”

“You love me.” Janis guffaws.

“I do. Which is why I’m worried about you sometimes. Take care of yourself.”

“It’s not that easy, you know.”

“I know that, hun. That’s what I’m here for. Talk to me, don’t just keep things to yourself if you need to talk about it.”

“And I appreciate you so much for that. But some days are just gonna be harder no matter what.”

Janis had to admit, it was hard as shit trying to keep a secret like that from Damian. A secret like being in a relationship with someone who hated her guts. She could never really let him know the details of the conversation they had yet, of course. She didn’t feel ready to— it was a major thing despite the fact that Damian was her best friend. Not that she didn’t trust him, she did. She really, really did. The past two weeks have just been a whirlwind. Janis needed to absolutely calm down before she took the next steps.

Meanwhile, Regina spent the last three minutes staring at her keyboard before sending these:

————

School let out at 2:50, Janis and Damian went to hang out as established. Their whole way to their usual coffee house, Janis was having an internal debate on whether or not to tell Damian. While waiting for their drinks and snacks, Janis played with her phone in her hand. Then, she decided to do something about that burning question. Janis texted Regina to ask if she could tell Damian about them.

Once they were settled in at their table, Janis cleared her throat, “Hey, Damian?”

“What’s up?” He asks, taking a sip of his drink.

“So, about Regina, and me…” Janis began, “Two weeks ago, we talked everything out because somehow I was at her house— for a completely unexpected, unrelated reason. But anyway, we worked through the middle school stuff and got back into contact. And um, last week, we decided to start going out. Because really we’ve had feelings for each other since back then and we’ve finally both come to terms with our sexuality and such.”

Damian was looking right at her, but then his expression was indescribable. “Uh…” Was all that came out of his mouth.

“Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad.” Came a strained reply from her best friend, “Really. Just processing what you said.”

The pair sat in silence for roughly two minutes before Damian broke it, “First of all, good for you. Finally off the market.”

Janis chuckles in relief.

“Second, I’m very happy you and Regina are on good terms now— obviously. But I have some questions.”

Janis nodded, “Of course. Ask away.”

“How did you end up at her house?”

“Gretchen called and said Regina wanted me there, turns out she wanted to talk.” Janis answered. That wasn’t the full truth— the reason for her initial visit wasn’t because Regina wanted to talk, it was because Regina was regressed. That was something way more personal so Janis wasn’t going to just share that on a whim. “I was scared…hesitant but I’m glad I went because things are so much better now.”

Damian hums, “Okay. Will you tell me though if anything happens, please? I just— want you to be safe, Janis. You know me, I know what went down. So I’m still going to be protective of you for awhile. Until I see that I can fully trust her with you.”

“That’s fair.” Janis nods, “Speaking of, I’m seeing her at five later.”

“Well, have a good time.” Damian smiled. “I’m happy you’re happy, yeah?”

“I know, and thanks for being cool with it.”

“Only because I trust you.” Damian laughs.

————

Right before the best friends got up to leave, Janis gets a call from Regina. “Hey, what’s going on?”

“Um, I feel a lil funny.” The laugh that came from the other girl was almost childlike. There was some yelling in the background— probably June getting mad at Kylie or their Dad.

“Okay, well, I’m on my way. Just stay in your room.” Janis furrowed her brows together in thought, “Lock the door.”

“Is she okay?”

“Sure hope so.” Janis shoves her phone into her pocket.

Janis made her way to the blonde’s house immediately after saying goodbye to Damian. Once she got there, the house was already quiet. June lets her in, shocked but happy to see her. “Is everything alright?” It was about 4:45 in the afternoon.

“Yeah, but Kylie got suspended for hitting someone so there was a little bit of yelling going on. But we figured it out, the other kid started it. We’re good now. You’re here for Regina?”

Janis nodded, brows raised briefly, “Yep.”

“She’s up in her room.”

“Sure. Thanks.” With that, Janis quietly trudged upstairs. Knocking on the bedroom door, she was swiftly let inside.

“They’re fine, Reg.” Janis assured, “It’s just something that happened at school. They worked it out.”

Regina shrugs, sitting at her desk. Janis asks, walking over, “So…what are we doing?”

“I’m colouring.” Regina answered simply, back facing Janis.

Janis drags an ottoman to the desk and sat down with her like that. “Hey.” Janis tapped her arm to get attention.

Regina glanced at the artist, not saying anything.

“How’re you feeling?” Janis asks, her palm purposefully on Regina’s lower back.

“It hurts. A little.” Regina seems to catch her drift.

“Did you take Advil?”

“No.”

Janis chewed on her lower lip, worried, “Anything?”

“Red box. Tylenol?” Regina squints, putting the yellow colour pencil down.

“Okay, that’s good.” Janis licked her lips, eyes panning over to look at what Regina was colouring. Janis just watched, keeping her hand on Regina’s back, gliding it up and down calmingly.

“Reg. Do you want a snack?” Janis asked after a few minutes.

“Yes, please.”

“Alright.” Janis stood up, pressing a kiss to the top of Regina’s head, “I’ll be right back.” Janis made her way to the kitchen, where she grabbed a melamine plate from the cupboard with a bit of a struggle. It was a little strange for the Georges to even have a melamine plate since neither Kylie nor Regina used those anymore— usually. So she figured it must’ve been Regina’s. For instances where she was regressed. Yeah, it was hers. It was a Barbie plate. Setting that down on the counter, Janis went over to the pantry to grab the bag of Goldfish crackers. They only had Cheddar flavoured ones this time, unfortunately. Then, Janis found herself rummaging through the fridge for some fruit. She settles on some strawberries, Regina’s favourite. Janis washed them and placed them on the plate too. Finally, she grabs two water bottles quickly before shutting the fridge and heading back upstairs.

“Here.” Janis set the plate down, opening a bottle of water for her too.

Regina chuckles, “Thanks, jellybean.”

“You’re welcome.” Janis smiled, sitting down on the ottoman again after handing Regina the bottle. After that, they sit in relative silence again. It was a comfortable one, though. Janis was glad it felt that way, that it felt like what she knew. They shared the snacks, and Janis asked her a question every now and then, that was related to her current activity or other fun, simple things. Janis certainly wasn’t going to talk about school and other ‘grown up’ responsibilities while Regina was regressed. Regina regresses for a reason— she wants to destress, she wants to focus less on her current ‘big’ life and find some escape and comfort at an age where she felt that way. Where she felt safe, and thoroughly happy, and worry-free.

“Jan?”

“Yep?”

“Can you stay with me tonight?” Regina asked hesitantly.

“Of course I can.” Janis agreed in a heartbeat, “I'll stay over tonight.”

Regina beamed, “Yay, thanks. Do you wanna watch a movie?”

“Sure, yeah. You don’t want to colour anymore?” “Nope.” Regina decided then headed over to her bed, but not before pulling Janis up. Janis took the snack plate over and put it down in between the both of them while Regina looked through Disney+ for what to watch. Her choice? Beauty and the Beast. Janis expected it— it was Regina’s favourite. She just hasn’t seen it in awhile, so a wave of nostalgia hit her pretty hard. The taller girl snuggled against Janis soon after. Janis didn’t even question it even though she was a little shocked by the sudden affection. Janis took a peek at her, snickering to herself. “What?” Regina asked, similarly wanting to laugh.

“Nothing, just looking to make sure you’re fine.” Janis lied poorly. Not that Regina could tell right now. “I’m okay.” Regina laughs, amused, “Watch the movie. I just wanna snuggle.”

“I am, I am.” Janis exhales, grabbing a strawberry from the plate, “We can snuggle all night if that’s what you want.”

“Really?” She gasped softly.

“Yes, Reg, Really.”

Nothing’s changed after all. They were back to how they were, and who they were— their masks have been shed since the long overdue conversation and they wouldn’t have it any other way.

🏷️Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartandstuff @reneesghostinthelivingroom @pda128

💭A/N:

I know, this took awhile. I’m sorryyyy😬 here it is, though. Hope you enjoyed 🫶🏼✨

#auli’i cravalho #renee rapp #janis ‘imi’ike #regina george #janis ‘imi’ike x regina george #rejanis #mean girls 2024 #mgmm fics #wlw #queer fiction #lgbtqia #lesbian #requested fic #character x character #post-canon #Spotify

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sorencd · 10 months ago

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hellooo can you write a fic about todd comforting reader after a fight w her parents please? thank youu

ARMS TONITE— i fellll in your arms toniighhtt

todd x reader drabble , idk how long this is , angst/fluff , im like so sorry this took so long tho lol

todd was always the person you’d run to when you know you couldn’t keep the tears in anymore. sometimes, when you’re having a bad day, a hug from him was all it took for you to have a smile on your face again. a gentle squeeze of reassurance from him was all you needed to gain a bit more confidence in whatever problem you were facing. his glance, always full of love, was all you needed to get throughout the day.

and today, you needed all of it at once. your hands, resting behind his back, squeezed and gripped his sweater as you poured your heart out. tears that had sorrow and disdain laced in them fell on the soft fabric beneath your chin, painting it with wet patches, but it was never a problem for todd.

“i just don’t understand, n-no matter how many times i tell them i’m not comfortable yet when it comes to talking to them about how i feel, they always take it as a sign to be offended?” you furrowed your eyebrows, furiously wiping your tears away in a moment of anger.

“they’re just so… hard sometimes, but i love them so much, i love them too much. i love them to the point that they could scream at me like i’m some annoying bothersome street dog and i’d still look at them with love.”

now you were full on crying, snot and everything. and todd just held you, in his arms, in his warm comfort, just being there for you. he understood where you were coming from. and he wanted you to know he’s there, listening. he rubbed circles on your back and gave you time to speak your mind, todd knew how much unsaid feelings and emotions you were bottling up.

“and it always hurts. that every time i have to conform to what they said and agree that they’re right. and they have this… talent. the ability to move on like it was nothing to them so i’m forced to just do the same. it’s tiring, you know?”

your voice was so small, barely even above a whisper. you were amazed at yourself for being able to form a coherent sentence with your choked sobs. and it hurt todd. it pained him— seeing you cry, seeing your face so full of dejection, cheeks all red and tear-stained, eyes puffy from relentlessly crying and a vice-grip on his back.

“yeah… parents are sometimes too much. i-i sometimes too just wanna run away from it all, not have some dumb responsibility looming behind me or-or when i’m mad at them too for getting shouted at because of the littlest things. i understand where you’re coming from, (y/n).”

you parted from where your face hid on the crook of his neck begrudgingly and rubbed the back of your hand against your eye, trying to wipe off the tears as todd pushed away and stray hair that was blocking your vision.

“thanks for listening, todd.”

“of course, i’ll always listen, i’ll sound like a broken record at this point, but i’m so glad that i’m one of the trusted people you tell all of this to-“

“the only person i tell all of this to.”

he softly laughed, “the only person you tell all of this to, and i just want you to know, i’ll always be here for you, okay? even if i’m… fighting off charlie or on the other side of the world, i’ll always find a way to be here, to wipe your face dry and make you smile.”

“you’re really so sappy sometimes. will you ever not be?”

“i love you too, (y/n).”

#todd anderson x reader #todd anderson #dead poets society x reader

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allwaswell16 · 2 years ago

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All the One Direction fics I read and enjoyed in April 2023. You can listen to my podcast to hear me talk about each of these fics as well as an overview of what was posted on ao3 including the fics on this month’s fic roundup which you can find here! Please let the writers know if you liked the fics by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

Fanfictional Podcast #49 | ko-fi | fic recs

—Louis/Harry—

🪷 Higher, Further, Faster by hazzahtomlinson / @itsnotreal

(NR, 31k, uni au) Or the one where Harry decides to go to college regardless of what his team warns him about and has to face the consequences, some of which aren’t so terrible after all.

🪷 I'm Weaker Without You by The_Halcyonic_Lachesist / @chai-hat-tea

(T, 20k, Regency au) Alpha Lord Louis Tomlinson is a rake who refuses to settle down. Will he settle down for the Society's most talked about Omega?

🪷 they say looks can kill (and i might try) by LiveLaughLoveLarry / @loveislarryislove

(M, 18k, superhero au) Now he walks those same streets as Rogue, a vigilante who makes his own justice - and he's making damn sure that justice is coming for CowellCorp too.

🪷 Wanna play you like a game, boy (what's the thrill of the same toy?) by thebreadvan / @thebreadvansstuff

(E, 10k, dom/sub) Louis is Harry's boss, and Harry has a humiliation kink.

🪷 Unraveling by D1ona30

(E, 10k, roommates) He thought over the past few weeks, how he’d just known at certain times what Louis had been thinking or feeling, needing or wanting and it didn’t make sense to him. Until he had the wild thought, “Can I read Louis's mind?”

🪷 to be a better man by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain

(E, 9k, cheating au) “But if you’re so concerned, go see what he wants. Make him happy enough to leave me alone, eh? Since you’re so worried.”

🪷 Maid in the A.M. by @lainy122

(E, 9k, famous/not famous) “You’re not supposed to be here.” The lad frowned at him.“Sorry,” Harry said automatically. Which, wait. No, that wasn’t right. “Um, actually, I sort of live here?”

🪷 Read you like a book by becka / @realmenwearpuppypants

(E, 8k, canon) Louis realises Harry can read his mind. He'll do anything to make Harry admit it.

🪷 Warm Chilling by Larry_you_know / @larryyouknow

(G, 7k, countryside) Louis moves into a cosy cottage in the English countryside with his dog Clifford to look after his great-aunt's animals.

🪷 Somethin' Old and Red by nonsensedarling / @absoloutenonsense

(NR, 5k, vampire au) There was a ritual with these things. He’d pour a splash into a wine glass —his favourite little joke was telling humans he loved a nice glass of red every now and again— then sat down in his living room and listened to music while he drank.

🪷 out of time by missinglockets

(G, 5k, canon) Louis finishes his cigarette, contemplating what to say to Harry. They don’t do this anymore. He doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into.

🪷 Things Unsaid by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(G, 4k, soulmate au) where you have a tattoo of the first thought your soulmate has when they see you

🪷 Harry Styles Plays with Kittens While Answering Questions by @sadaveniren

(T, 4k, hybrids au) Louis runs a Youtube channel and Harry is his celebrity guest

🪷 Unplant by @hellolovers13

(M, 4k, neighbors) Louis should've looked where he was going, then he wouldn't have to desperately try to save a little flower now.

🪷 lucky once, could be lucky again by @jaerie

(E, 2k, a/b/o) Louis has been letting the rich and famous knot him for cash since he found himself walking out on the lavish lifestyle of his rockstar future mate.

🪷 Baby you're a little mind reader by larrycaring / @mystupidamours

(G, 2k, uni au) Person A is thinking inappropriate thoughts, suddenly panics and thinks: “If you’re a mind reader, cough right now.” Person B: *coughs*

🪷 ready for a war by @nouies

(E, 1k, pwp) Harry was so close to getting caught, and it was all on that stupidly pretty cocktail waiter.

—Rare Pairs—

🪷 for your eyes only by @muldxr

(M, 9k, Harry/James Bond) While on a dangerous mission, 007 reunites with an old flame.

🪷 Come get your man by Lhhome / @lhhomefics

(T, 3k, Niall/Harry/Lewis Capaldi/Shawn Mendes) “Oh that well its a funny story, I was drunk and it was like four in the morning or something and i sent him something that i don't even remember but it was one of those messages that disappear so I couldn’t even find out what I sent him and he refuses to tell me so honestly I am excusing myself from the narrative, it's all on him” Lewis explains.

#28th appreciation #trackinghappily #trackinghome #tracksintheam #1dficvillage #1dsource #hltracks #ficrec

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danses-with-dogmeat · 1 year ago

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Day 15 -- Gary(s)

The (nsfw) details for Kinktober 2023, Day 15 are just below the cut!

Minors, please don’t interact.

Cloning/Selfcest with Gary x Gary

Please give this one a chance, it really may surprise you 👀. That's all I'm gonna say.

Here is the link to my Kinktober 2023 Event List so you can stay up-to-date, or re-visit these works as you please.

Included: Selfcest, semi-public sex, clones, forbidden love, undressing, kissing, light dom/sub dynamics, anal fingering, gay sex, hand job, anal creampie, aftercare.

Words: 3k

“Seven.” Gary 12 whispered from his shaded alcove, his grip tight enough on the wall beside him that it turned his knuckles white, made the veins across his hands ache. “Seven, it’s me. Please, turn around.”

“I know it’s you.” His voice was flat as he kept his body turned away, facing out towards the atrium, towards the crowd of look-alikes in matching blue jumpsuits below.

“Seven, please, I just wanna talk.”

“I can’t, Twelve. You know that.”

Twelve’s teeth gritted together painfully, and a heat began to sear his eyes as his counterpart kept his back to him, as his voice never lost its apathetic quality, only gained a pinch of malice.

“Why? Because of what One said?”

“Obviously.” The vault guard hissed, turning his head to Twelve only for a moment, before properly resuming his statuesque posture facing towards the crowd below.

“What does it matter? We knew it was wrong before, knew he’d never have allowed–”

“Enough, Twelve.” Gary Seven finally broke, lashing his rigid form around to face his partner as he spoke with a quiet cruelty. “Either join the rest of the crowd below for the evening address, or go back to your room.”

“I’ll happily go back there, if you would just come with me.” Twelve spoke up, holding his ground against his hardened adversary, his body equally solid, even as his voice softened and waivered between words. “We need to talk about this. A-about us. I've put this off as long as I can, but--”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Seven couldn’t look him in the eye, his gaze planted at his partner’s chest as he lied through his teeth.

“I-if you believe that… Then you’re a bigger fool than all the others down there.” Twelve could see the way Seven clenched his jaw, prepared to refute him.

“Look at them, Seven. Brainless One worshippers. Like he’s any better than any of us. We’re the same. And more than that–”

“Keep your voice down, Twelve, if someone heard you, I…”

“More than that,” He continued, taking a step closer so he could lower his voice, so he could almost brush his chest against his partner’s. “We’re human, Seven. What we had? We need this. Don't let it become a memory.”

“I…” Seven’s nostrils flared as he released a sigh.

I’ve got him. Twelve’s lips very nearly curled into an optimistic grin at the realization, as he saw an uninvited hint of sadness shining in his partner’s eyes.

A regret at leaving things the way he had. Leaving everything unsaid, unfinished.

“...I don’t want to have to arrest you.”

And then it was gone, and that hard voice, those set brows and lifeless eyes returned, and Twelve’s breath caught in his throat from the pain of it.

He couldn’t move, even as Seven began to turn away from him again, to go back to his post.

“I won’t care if you do.” Twelve whispered, pursuing him. “At least then… I’d get to see you. Even from behind a cell. Even if you don’t feel this way anymore, I… I can’t pretend like it– what we had– didn’t happen. I’m not… Not like you that way, Seven.”

It was a long moment of silence before anything happened. So long, that Gary One had stepped out onto the balcony and began his address to the field of copies below. The sound of his voice was tiresome, a hum of monotonous echoes that droned through the steel walls, never quite meeting Twelve’s ears. Finally though, Seven turned around to face him, and even more, he stepped far enough into the alcove that no one could see. No one but Twelve, as he-- in turn-- was backed into the darkness.

“I can never forget…”

The guard’s hand was softer than it had any right to be, as he brushed the pads of his fingers over Twelve’s cheek.

“Like you said, we’re the same.” Both hands were there now, gently holding either side of Twelve’s face, as they peered into each other’s matching eyes. “And like you…”

Seven’s voice faded, and only his gaze remained, only his hands upon his partner’s face, only that small, insignificant space between their bodies that cried to be filled.

“Shit, I need this.”

Suddenly, firm hands fell to his shoulders and pushed Twelve back further into the dark storage alcove, and their mirrored lips crashed together with an aggressive passion. Twelve’s hands flew to Seven’s waist in response, hauling their forms closer, until they might meld back together where they’d begun. Where they belonged.

“One controls everything.” Seven growled into his partner, his own hands roaming Twelve’s body hungrily, as though he didn’t know every nook and cranny by memory, as though he was discovering their bodies for the first time. “Our jobs, our energy, our food, water…”

Twelve let out a whine as his partner scraped his teeth over his bottom lip.

“He can’t take this from us. Can’t control this.”

Twelve could only frantically nod his agreement, his fingers holding onto his partner’s waist in a death grip as Seven’s own grasping hands set upon Twelve’s vault suit zipper, swiftly tugging it downwards and exposing his chest to the cool, stale air.

His breath hissed between his lips as Twelve sucked in a gasp at the feeling, flushing at the way he felt his nipples harden in response to the drastic change in temperature.

“Seven–” Twelve whined out, as quietly as he could manage.

“I know, love.” With a series of quick, rough movements, Seven had his partner’s arms out of his sleeves, and was hauling the suit down to his hip bones. “Just try and keep quiet for me.”

With that, Seven’s touch became more gentle, as he slowly turned his partner away from him, and Twelve instinctively braced his hands against the cool, steel wall in front of him. Seven’s breath was hot against his neck, making the little hairs there stand on end as he began to trail heated kisses down the line of his bare spine. The vaultie’s back arched at the feeling, and he had to bite into his lip to follow his partner’s direction.

Quiet. Right. More important now than ever before…

Suddenly, Twelve was distinctly aware of the massive crowd of copies just down below, the guards that would be patrolling on their level, and above that…

One can’t see us from his vantage point, I made sure of that ahead of time…

Still though, the thought brought him no solace as he felt goosebumps crawl up his spine. And then Seven’s hands were on him, distracting his troubled mind from all that wasn’t him. Seven’s touch was becoming rough again, needy, and Twelve felt his heartbeat pick up in his chest as his partner’s hand trailed down his torso to his naval.

He sucked in a breath, waiting for the steady touch to reach his quickly hardening cock, but then… it stopped. Right below his belly button, Seven’s hand ceased, and merely tugged backwards, pulling Twelve’s body into a further bent-over position against the wall.

He felt his erection throb in anticipation from where it stood stiff between his legs, and spread his feet further apart to invite his partner in.

A pleased hum sounded from the man behind him, and next Twelve knew, one hand was smoothing over his ass and slowly sliding in between to tease at the puckered entrance he found there.

Twelve let his head fall back, and despite himself, a pleasured little groan left his throat without permission.

“Shh, you have to keep quiet, love. If you want this–”

“I do.” Twelve couldn’t help but interrupt, thrusting his hips backwards and into the feel of his partner’s prodding fingers.

“If you want this,” The hand on his stomach vanished, and reappeared on the back of his neck, whispering a threat that made Twelve’s cock leak into his vault suit. “You have to listen to me. And be very, very quiet. Do you understand me, Twelve?”

“Yes–” He tried, and Seven’s grip tightened.

Instead of finishing his verbal confirmation, the clone nodded, and the pressure on his neck released.

“Good.” Seven whispered, his voice low and rough with building arousal.

A particularly explorative prod of his fingers had Twelve gripping the wall in front of him with white knuckles, and a sudden thought sparked in his mind with the pain of it.

“W-wait, Seven. We don’t have any–”

“Shh, you think that I didn’t think of that, pet?” Seven’s hand stroked soothingly over his ass, and then the touch, and his partner’s presence behind him, vanished altogether. “We’re in a supply closet.”

A zipper sounded behind him, and then an adjusting of fabric.

“One that I happen to know quite well, in fact.”

Then a cap being undone, and the sound of skin rubbing on skin.

Twelve’s cock felt like an atomic core, hot and ready to explode with the right kind of motivation, his belly like a furnace, his legs shaking with wanton expectancy.

“Don’t you trust me?” Seven’s presence returned behind him, and Twelve couldn’t help but lean back towards him.

“Always, Seven.” He whispered, and in his mind's eye, saw that familiar smile upon his partner’s face in response.

It was instant, the feeling of racking pleasure sending strikes of lighting through his body, as Seven’s deliciously slick fingers met his skin. One hand returned to its place between his ass cheeks, massaging the oil into him in undulating movements until the steady press of two fingers began their intrusion of him. The other hand went directly to Twelve’s cock now, pulling it from his suit's confines and smoothing the oil down the length of his shaft in languid strokes.

Twelve could swear he tasted blood on his tongue, as he tried, very nearly in vain, to keep his pleasured sounds at bay.

The spread of Seven’s fingers in him had his stomach muscles clenching, his brows furrowing in pleasure as he felt his entrance widen to accommodate his partner-- hell, to welcome him.

Welcome him back.

Twelve felt the start of tears prick his eyes at the thought of it, at more than just the overwhelming feeling of Seven opening him up.

He hadn’t lost his partner. One hadn’t taken Seven away from him, like Twelve had feared. Like he always feared. Even in the beginning; the confusing feelings, the curious touches, the coy smiles… No one knew how far it was going to come, least of all Twelve, and he remembered being scared shitless, even as his heart swelled with a newfound affection, with love for the first time.

And now? Now, he couldn’t imagine his life any other way.

Without Seven, what was there in this frigid, steel prison?

Only stagnant tedium, a lulling absence of life, of mind, of feeling.

This… what he had with Seven, it was a startling antithesis to such a dismal existence.

“Fuck, I missed you.” Seven put Twelve’s thoughts to words at the feeling of him wrapping warmly around his pulsing fingers. “I can’t wait…”

“Don’t, then.” Twelve practically pleaded. “Seven… I want you.”

“Just a moment more.” The guard growled out, clearly as unenthusiastic about the idea of holding back as Twelve was.

Though he hated to wait, there was definite gratitude radiating through him as Seven pressed his digits in to the knuckle, and began thrusting them in earnest. The soft pads of his fingers scraped against Twelve’s insides, the oil easing the way and creating a delicious friction that had him panting against the metal wall he was braced against. His breath fogged the cold surface with each push into him, with each scissoring spread of his partner’s digits, and Twelve nearly bit through his tongue with the effort of holding in his moans.

“That’s it…” Seven breathed into his ear. His stroking had slowed over Twelve’s cock, but still, he felt hard as steel as his partner’s hand pulled away. Seven’s fingers eased out of him at the same moment, forcing out an unstifled gasp with the sudden empty feeling.

It was time.

Twelve’s legs were shaking.

Both of Seven’s hands set upon his partner in a new place, spreading his ass cheeks and acting as a pathway for his own aching cock to enter. The pressure increased, as the leaking tip of Seven’s member rested against his entrance teasingly, spreading more of the oil there before, slowly, he began to press inside.

The feeling of relief was instant, overwhelming, and Twelve would’ve surely collapsed to the cold ground, if not for one of Seven’s hands reaching to grasp at his stomach, keeping him in place as his cock surged forward, and then came to a halt within him. Seven’s hips were pressed firmly to Twelve’s ass, holding there, fully sheathed, as they both panted through their shared pleasure.

“Alright?”

Twelve nodded to him vigorously, and for emphasis, placed one of his hands over Seven’s where it rested upon his stomach.

“Good.”

The word was punctuated with a shallow thrust of his partner’s hips against him, before he truly began to ease out, leaving only the tip nestled inside. Seven held there a moment, until he felt Twelve clench his walls wantonly around him, urging him to continue, and then, steadily, he plunged forward again.

Twelve couldn’t help the groan that left him, especially when Seven’s free hand delved back between his thighs to take his cock in hand. His partner stroked him in time with his languid thrusts, sending bursts of searing bliss all throughout his body from the warmth, the delicious stretch, the friction. Already, Seven could feel the way his partner’s walls gripped him periodically, the way Twelve’s cock throbbed and wept pre-cum onto the polished floor between his legs as his pace grew more hastened.

“S-say this isn’t the end.” Twelve’s weak voice cut through the charged, forced silence, and Seven paused his movements.

“What?”

“Tell me, please, that after this, things won’t go back.” Twelve’s voice shook, his head hanging low between his hunched shoulders as he pleaded with his partner. “We won’t be just… other Garies to each other, l-like we were pretending to be after One’s speech.”

“No, Twelve.”

Warmth spread through him as Seven pressed himself inside fully, his hand on his hip coming up to caress Twelve’s chest in an all-encompassing embrace. A kiss pressed to one shoulder before suddenly, Seven pulled away.

Twelve’s breath left him as his partner did, his eyes wide at the sudden shift of feeling, of absence, and then he was turning, following Seven’s guiding hands as they turned him so they were facing one another. Once there, Seven eased him to lean back against the wall, taking one of Twelve’s legs in hand and hiking it up to brace over his elbow, spreading him. The other hand went down to grip his cock, as Seven nudged the reddened tip to Twelve’s entrance once more, before plunging back inside.

Twelve felt himself mold to his partner’s familiar shape instantly, releasing another gasp as Seven delved deeper than before in their new position.

“It’s never going to be like that again. You… were right. One is a tyrant, and he…”

A grunt interrupted him as Seven picked up his movements, thrusting more wildly than before as his fury surged through his body, becoming noticeable in his intense eyes as they stayed locked to Twelve’s.

“I don’t care what it takes.” He punctuated each word with another buck of his hips, filling Twelve to bursting on every rapid stroke. He could feel the pressure in his own cock building to unbearable new heights as he gripped Seven’s shoulders until his fingernails were bound to leave scarlet marks in their wake.

“Even if it topples the whole vault, if it takes all-out war between us, you have my word, Twelve, that I’ll never allow us to become strangers again.”

Twelve was fighting to hold back his whines as his partner jostled him, as his cock was rubbed between their heaving torsos until it finally couldn’t hold back, and Twelve burst out his release onto his stomach.

Seven's hand pressed to his mouth instantly, muffling the sounds that did manage to escape his throat, as he continued his onslaught. He was close though, Twelve could see it in his expression, that desperation, that intensity, that passion that One had almost managed to sever him from forever.

But the Overseer never could win out, when it came to Seven and Twelve. It was truer now than ever before.

“Never. Again.” Seven thrust forward a final time, stilling then, as he spilled his seed deep inside his partner. His hips pulsed with every burst, and Twelve held on tightly to his shoulders as Seven rode out his climax with his body snug against him.

He ended, panting into the crook of Twelve’s shoulder as he stroked over the back of his neck soothingly. Finally, that pent-up rage, the frustration, the culmination of fear and stress and anger all seemed to drain out of their bodies, leaving them light and tingly with the newfound deliverance at each other’s hands.

Quietly, Seven listened to the commotion down in the atrium, his ears searching for any sign that they might’ve been heard, might’ve been caught.

When he deemed it safe, Seven finally made to pull back, and Twelve’s firm grip on him eased. He nearly collapsed to the ground without his partner's support, but managed to stay upright against the wall as Seven reached for a rag stored in a cubby beside them.

With tender hands, he cleaned them both of spend and pulled their respective vault suits back into place.

Twelve was still flushed, his hair disheveled slightly, and Seven had sweat dripping from his forehead, but otherwise, they were both back to their nondescript selves.

“He can’t separate us.” Seven whispered finally before they could leave the alcove and return to their ruse, their illusion of unfamiliarity. His voice was dark, determined, and sharp as a razor as his eyes stayed locked to Twelve's. “And if he tries to… I’ll kill him.”

#fallout #fallout 3 #fallout npc #fallout 3 npcs #fallout 3 companions #gary fo3 #gary x gary #fallout gary #this isn't a crack fic i swear #pls read it #the garys deserve some love #dwd.nsfw #kinktober 2023 #kinktober

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willshipanything-blog · 2 years ago

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Rules of the Game- Chapter 15

New chapter for your weekend reading!

Find the whole chapter index here.

Or, read on AO3 if you prefer. (Detailed tags there)

MINORS DNI!

Chapter 15- Ghosts

“Hey, dove, wanna come give me a hand with some things?” Al’s head had peeked around the metal door of the basement, and you nodded brightly, throwing the blanket from your legs. You folded down the corner of the page of Northanger Abbey to keep your place, even though you’d read it cover-to-cover twice now (you really needed to ask for some more reading material soon).

It had only been a few hours since he’d given you breakfast down here, meaning he probably had a day off work. You liked those days; it meant less time spent alone to wander in the labyrinth of your own mind. And more time with Al, of course. He had been letting you up more frequently, and not just when he left the door open for a game of Naughty Girl (though he had done that since, too- the fading handprints on your bottom and thighs evidence of your purposeful misbehaviors. The warm, hazy memory of it would last longer than the red marks). No, he had allowed you to venture upstairs for other reasons, too. Mostly into the kitchen, where he would feed you breakfast or just talk to you- with Al asking most of the questions, still reluctant to open up completely. It all felt like forward progress in your relationship- though you still hadn’t been able to say what that relationship even was. You were convinced it would remain a nameless, intangible concept. Like saying it aloud would mar it, make it feel wrong, which of course it was. Leaving it unsaid meant not having to admit this.

You reached the door and instinctively took the expectant hand that was held out. Not that Al was dragging you by the wrist forcefully anymore. But allowing him to lead meant less culpability in your compliance. You squeezed his hand tight, and his blue eyes smiled down at you through the pale horned mask, though his warm smile was on full display. It matched your own.

In the kitchen, Al nodded towards a couple of brown paper bags sitting on the breakfast table.

“Put those away for me, and I’ll whip you up a snack.” You could smell the coffee brewing already and saw Al take out a small blade from the knife rack. A fleeting image of his switchblade that he kept in his back pocket rippled through your mind, but you supposed he no longer kept it on hand, right? Aside from this short-lived, baseless worry, it felt like a (relatively) normal morning, though Al seemed jittery and excitable. You mused as you began to unpack the bags: had he a surprise game in store for you, or had he just drunk a whole pot of coffee already? You unloaded the bags. Milk, Wonder Bread, Kraft mac and cheese, a bunch of frozen TV dinners, two whole cartons of eggs; he really wasn’t much of a cook, huh?

“Al, I could make dinner sometime, if you’d like?” you suggested as you stocked the refrigerator and kitchen cabinets with the groceries. Since your first breakfast together in this very room, you’d felt more at ease with talking freely. On these occasions, there were no tricksy games, you weren’t obliged to follow any orders, the only intimacies were a couple of soft kisses or held waists. If someone were to look through the kitchen window, it was a picture of marital bliss (albeit with a barely-dressed wife half her husband’s age). You figured it was as normal as your life might ever be again, though admittedly the word ‘normal’ didn’t hold much meaning anymore.

“Aw, you don’t have to do that for me, dove.” He said, looking up at you across the kitchen as he slowly peeled a lush red apple. The crimson skin had spiraled in one long corkscrew from the fruit before he severed it, tossing it on the counter and beginning to cut out slices. Having finished putting away the groceries, you walked towards Al.

“No, I’d like to. If that’s ok. I could write you a list of things you’d need-” you were cut off by Al holding a slice of apple mid-air, sitting atop the knife. You leaned forward to his request, sliding it carefully from the blade, your bottom teeth scraping across the metal. It was sweet, though that hint of danger laced the fruit with a bitter aftertaste. Had you said the wrong thing?

“You know what dove? Sure. We’ll do dinner soon,” That captivating smile broke across his face before he concluded his thought:

“It’s a date.” He popped a slice of apple into his own mouth as you looked on, completely beguiled in that moment, absorbed in implausible fantasies of Al pouring wine over a candlelit dinner for two. Al ushered you to the breakfast table, cleaving these thoughts from your head. You were privately amused; who’d have thought the only thing to sever you from thoughts of Al would be Al?

Perching yourself on one of the stools at the breakfast bar, Al served you a plate of fresh-cut apple slices and you dug in enthusiastically, though you noticed Al seemed to be hopping from one foot to another, and rubbing his thumbs and fingers together. His little tic.

“What?” you joked, tickled by his nervousness.

“I’ve got a surprise for you. I want you to guess what it is.”

A million ideas darted in your head. It was something nice, clearly, from how excited and nervous Al was. If it was a dark game, he’d be much cooler, his eyes black with that lustful hunger.

“Is it… candy?” Your voice was playful, flirtatious.

“Not food. Guess again.”

“Um, a sweater?” Something that could have been useful, but it seemed unlikely Al would prefer your body covered up.

“One more try.” His impish voice floated in the air as he walked behind you, his fingers playing along your shoulder and back. You wondered just how brazen you could be when Al was in such a spirited disposition.

“Is it… the combination to that bike lock?” Your heart raced; why the fuck did you even say that? Al’s hand stopped on your back, before his face leaned down next to yours.

“My, my, what an insolent little thing.” His hot breath huffed in your ear, sending a quiver through you, though you sensed he was enjoying your display of impudence. You’d clocked him right; you were getting better at reading him it seemed. As quickly as that bestial voice came, the playful one reappeared.

“No, silly!” He chided gleefully, placing the surprise on the tabletop, as if from nowhere. Like magic. “Books!”

“Oh!” You looked down at the pile on the breakfast bar, as Al slid onto the stool next to you, sitting sideways so his knees pressed into your thigh. You glanced his way and smiled, a genuine smile at his thoughtfulness. You perused the slim tomes, noticing the stickers on the spine.

“Mm-hmm. I had to sign up for a card and everything. Boy, was that librarian lady scary!” You knew straight away that he was referring to Ms. Rutherford, and laughed at the mental picture of Al being shushed and scolded by the old battleax.

“You went to the library for me?”

“I had a couple recommendations. I hope they’re ok dove.”

“Did you pick these out Al?” You were fairly impressed with the selection: The Great Gatsby, The Lord of the Flies, and The Bell Jar. You’d enjoyed the first two in high school, and the latter was one of your favorites. You absentmindedly began to eat your apple slices as you browsed the covers and blurbs of the books.

“Mmm.” You concurred through a mouthful of fruit, flipping through the pages of Lord of the Flies. “Yeah, I love reading most genres, but I know I’ll like-”

You stopped. The book was open at the very front, the first page frozen midair between your thumb and forefinger. The bite of apple in your mouth turned suddenly bitter. On the inside cover was the little card that had the names and dates of people who’d borrowed the books previously, meticulously curated by Ms. Rutherford. You’d glanced at a name that froze you in your tracks.

Griffin Stagg.

No. No no no. Not here. Not now.

Al must have sensed how white you’d turned, and the book was taken from your shaking hands.

Things had been going so well, so nice. And now this- a visceral, sickening reminder of who the man sat in front of you really was. You looked up in repulsion at Al. You'd almost stopped seeing him as the Grabber. The name on the library punch card had been forever erased by him, an inky phantom all that remained of Griffin Stagg. How easily you’d forgotten the evil lurking behind that charming smile and those earnest eyes. Al was the façade- the Grabber was his undeniable true self- wasn’t he? Unable to process the gutting reminder laid out in front of you, you bolted for the basement- where else could you go? If he called after you it went unheard, your dizzying thoughts screaming internally. You slammed the wooden door, thundered down the stairs and pulled the metal door closed with a clang. You don’t know how, but you made it to the mattress and under the blanket before breaking out into a howling cry, each breath choking you, each second bringing a fresh, haunting realization of the things you’d done with that…monster.

It wasn’t long until you heard the door opening, footsteps walking towards where you lay sobbing into a tear-stained pillow.

“Y/N. I’m- I’m sorry about the book.”

You remained curled on your side, stifling your cries and choosing to ignore the deep voice coming from above you. The blanket slid from you, pulled away and lost.

“Y/N. Look at me. You know I never meant that to happen.”

You remained obstinately mute aside from your choked tears. You didn’t care what excuses he had; he couldn’t change the things he’d done. A hand touched your shoulder and you recoiled, your emotions flaring into anger.

“Leave me alone.” You spoke coldy. It should have been a loud enough warning- you were clear in your speech; you had no intention of accepting his apology: what could possibly come close to atoning for the sins he’d committed?

Oblivious hands gripped your shoulder in an attempt to turn you towards him. Did he want your sympathy? Your forgiveness? He deserved nothing, and his pursuit of these things made you sick with rage.

“Don’t FUCKING touch me!” You sprung from the bed to face him, a few paces away from where he stood. He looked surprised, troubled, which angered you even more. Was he so stupid he couldn’t see how this had affected you? Could he not imagine the painful memories this had unearthed inside you? How dare he be the one feeling upset? You glowered at him through your watery eyes, and felt every inch of your face contorting with contempt.

“Let’s not do this right now, dove.” Al’s dangerous tone insinuated that continuing this behavior wouldn’t end well. You didn’t know exactly what the consequences of your outburst would be, but at this point you’d gone past caring. You were seething.

“Or what, you gonna do to me what you did to Griffin?” That about did it. Just like your last argument in this room, he barged at you, slamming your back into the solid stone wall. You expected it, though your smaller frame could do nothing to stop his almost inhuman strength as he pinned you between the concrete and his own weight.

A large hand reached for your neck, crushing your windpipe beneath strong fingers. You were unsure if you’d be alive to see the marks bruise purple and black along your neck. A thought flitted through your mind: is he going to beat you, or will he fuck you instead- is this a turn on for him, seeing you at his mercy, crying and shouting and completely broken?

“You know that’s not what I want, little thing.” Unable to retort due to the constriction in your throat, you clawed uselessly at his hand around your neck. He continued, your frantic struggling barely interrupting his speech. “You know I want you right here with me,” he growled in your ear, moving his head close, his body pressing you breathlessly against the wall.

“Or are you forgetting who you belong to, Y/N?” The hand that wasn’t wrapped around your throat pulled your shirt down and traced along the white-hot scar. It was fainter than ever, but the wound he had inflicted would remain embedded in your skin forever. AL. Marking you as eternally his. But this beast in front of you wasn’t Al. It was the Grabber.

You’d settled on staying with Al, not fighting or trying to escape. You hadn’t made the same promise to the Grabber. Removing a hand that had been scrabbling for release, you instead spread your palm wide, and swiped at his face. Your long nails clawed into the skin of his cheek and jaw, and he reeled from the unexpected attack, screaming wildly, though his hand stuck secure at your neck. He turned his head to face you once more, thin lacerations down his face contrasting against his white skin.

“Oh dove,” he uttered huskily “You really shouldn't have done that.” He smiled before his next attack, knowing how hopelessly outmatched you were.

He delivered a succession of hard slaps to your face, batting away any feeble attempts at retaliation your now weakened body tried to muster. Your cheek was burning in pain, with the Grabber only relenting to fire a final blow, releasing your neck as his fist flew towards your reddened cheek. You fell on the floor in a crumpled pile. He hadn’t been this violent since your escape attempt. Pain was becoming a gratifying game for you, but this wasn’t Naughty Girl; right now this was uncontrollable rage, untethered violence. There was no pleasure mixed with the pain he was inflicting right now.

The clank of the belt buckle forced you to look up at the creature standing in front of you. It wasn’t Al, this was the maniac who’d taken you away from your previous life. He was just missing the top hat and black balloons, but he was the same psychotic monster. Out of other options, you dashed for the door, but he caught you easily by the arm, swinging you back into the room. You were thrown to the floor, your bare legs scraping dirt and grit and remnants of broken glass as you skidded along the ground.

“You know how I feel about leaving without permission, Y/N.” His voice seeped in danger and fury, red mist blinding him to the damage he was inflicting. He whipped his belt from their loops, beginning to wrap it around a fist.

You screamed back just as loudly, your voice tremulous but no less emboldened by rage:

“I don’t know shit! I don’t know who you are anymore. You don’t know who you are either. You’re not Al… not the man…I thought you were!” Speaking his name, the name of the man you’d developed complex, vile feelings for, reduced you to pathetic tears, and you broke down sobbing. Wiping your face with your hand, you noticed the gold band enclosed around your finger. The one thing you had felt sure about was that his promise would remain unbroken. That promise lay in tatters, meaningless now. He crept closer, ready for the next round, the tormenting lashes approaching.

You yanked the ring from your finger; it was truly worthless.

“You haven’t kept your fucking promise! Did it all mean nothing to you, did I mean nothing?”

You screamed these words through your frenetic wails, and threw the ring in his direction. It landed by his feet, and he stopped dead. You hunched on the floor, head cradled in your arms, past caring what he would do next. You heard only your own violent weeping for a moment, the expectant lashes never reaching your skin. Looking up, you saw him staring at you, belt limp by his side, now holding his ring in his other hand. You couldn’t be sure, but you sensed his eyes were as tearful as yours behind the mask. His mouth trembled; he opened it to speak before abandoning the task. He left silently. The only sound beside your cries was the thud and click as the door locked behind him.

You sunk your head back into your arms, trying to block out the light. You were unable to block out your intrusive thoughts. You wanted to cry, to scream, to vomit, mostly to forget. But all you could do was think. Your thoughts were far more painful than any injury he had just dealt.

This wasn’t fair. Why did you have to remember the things he’d done? This whole thing was working because you forced yourself to forget about it all, let go of the past in blissful unawareness. You had stopped using the kidnapper’s nickname- it was just Al. Al, who made you breakfast and made you feel wanted, made you feel things you’d never felt before. Al who had kept his promise to take care of you. His little games, his gentle hands and his obscene perversions which you had come to crave. You could live with those, embrace them, take pleasure in them. But the spiteful reminder of the Grabber’s innate evil within the pages of that book, the truly heinous things he’d done, the small lives he’d extinguished- it was all too much.

That thing upstairs wasn’t Al. He was a kidnapper, a murderer, a (it sickened your stomach to think the word) rapist. It was true though: how could it not be? How was your ‘relationship’ ever anything but violating and wrong? You were his captive, his possession. But you had wanted some of those things, hadn’t you? Or had he just made you think that? It hurt more to be reminded of what he was than it ever had been to learn the fact, face it for the first time.

You were more upset that you’d remembered the Grabber’s atrocities than you were about the acts themselves. Your implicitness in the fabrication of normality, your purposeful forgetfulness- did these things make you a monster too?

Everything is ruined. It’s all fucked up. Of course she wouldn’t forget, how could she ever forget the things the Grabber had done? Al spied the damned book on the table, picking it up and shredding it to pieces with his bare hands. The book wasn’t to blame, really. Eventually, she would have remembered something, a trigger to remind her of his past, an image in her mind of the crimes he’s committed.

She said that even he had lost a sense of himself, and he supposed she was right, the clever little thing. Was he still the Grabber? To her, who had looked at him with such hatred and disgust, he was. But he hadn’t done that in a long time, and wasn’t planning on it again. He didn’t need Naughty Boy, didn’t need to live out his childhood suffering. She was here, and things were better. Or at least, had been better.

Why did he react like that? He hadn't acted on those urges in an age, and had only released his lust for pain when she wanted him to, when he gave her the choice to go upstairs and play that game. He shrank in horror at what he’d done to her. He had sworn never to hurt her like that again, to never go too far in inflicting his sadistic compulsions. He had broken his one promise.

But I can't let her go. Y/N is mine, my precious dove. Al held the ring up in the midday light before heading to the living room, slumping into his chair. He placed the ring in front of the photo frame, the one of him and Max from eons ago. He truly does fuck up everything. It wasn’t fair- he’d been trying hadn’t he? As he sobbed quietly, he determined his next move.

No more games for a while. He needs to care for her. He needs to just be Al for a while. Even if she never sees him as that again.

#the black phone #black phone fanfic #the grabber x reader #the grabber #albert shaw x reader #the grabber x you #albert shaw #first fic

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osamustar · 3 years ago

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High School Sweetheart

Part two

Previous - Next

No trigger warnings provided.

Sexual content.

Female reader.

You were zoned out in the passenger seat of Michael’s car, imagining the two of you having the most nasty, disrespectful sex you could possibly think of. You jumped, feeling Michael’s hand on your thigh. “You okay over there? You’re going cross eyed.” You smacked his arm, glaring at him. “Some things are better left unsaid you asshole.” “What? It’s cute.” He smiled, keeping his eyes on the road. “What’re you thinking about? You seemed really into it.” “Nothing…” “Oh really? You’re pretty flustered right now I don’t think nothi—“ “Shut up, Michael!”

You’ve been with Michael for five years and telling him that you thought about him railing you every five minutes never got any easier. It was embarrassing. Michael confidently talked about what he thought about with you all the time. Usually he would just blurt things out. Fault of his ADHD. “Dude… So earlier—“ “Dude.” You mocked him, smiling out the window. “Shut up, damn… I don’t even wanna say it anymore…” He pouted. “Aww did I upset the baby?” You pinched his cheek, quickly pulling away as he turned his head to nip your hand. He smiled, “you’re an asshole, but I love you.” He sighed, turning into Carrie’s driveway where Billy’s truck was parked.

Michael got out and rushed to the other side before you could open the door yourself, opening it for you. “M’lady.” He bowed, putting his hand out for you to grab. You giggled, taking ahold of his hand as he helped you out. You looked up at her house in awe. It was massive, all white, with giant pillars holding up the ceiling. “Someone has a rich daddy…” Michael mumbled, walking up to the door with his arm wrapped around your waist. Michael wore his same outfit from earlier, but you had changed into a small dress and pumps after Michael ran by your house.

Michael banged on the door, the door almost immediately opening. Jason stood behind the door, awkwardly waving. Out of the group you liked Jason best. He was the sweetest one, only wanting to make people happy. “Hi Jason, How are you doing?” You smiled as he let the two of you in. “I-I’m good… We just got done setting up all the tables outside.” He looked down at the ground. He always had a hard time maintaining eye contact, and interacting with people. He tried his best though to fit in. Michael wrapped an arm around Jason, shaking him a bit as he squeezed him. “We’re gonna have a good time tonight, alright? You let me know if anyone messes with you.” He rubbed his knuckles into Jason’s head. Jason smiled, nodding. “Jason! Where the hell are you?!” Billy screamed from across the house. “I-I gotta go…” Jason scurried off. Michael sighed, “Jason’s autistic… I’m not sure if I ever told you that. We all look out for him, and I hope you will too. There’s usually no issues as long as us boys are around, but if you see him wondering off and encountering some problems, you let us know, alright?” Michael looked down at you with a very stern look. You nodded, smiling solemnly, “Jason’s a sweet boy, I’ve always looked out for him…” “Exactly. No one hurts my boy.”

——————————————————————————

“Is this what you were imagining earlier, baby? Me treating you like an object… Using you like a little fuck toy?” The two of you had snuck off upstairs into one of the vacant guest bedrooms. More like one of you, Michael, drug you up here. Michael grabbed a fistful of your hair, tugging your head back, exposing your neck. Michael hummed softly into your ear, licking your lobe. He groaned as he thrusted into you, smacking your ass. He shoved you back into the mattress to hold your hips, squeezing your thickness. Cute little giggles left him as he destroyed you, leaving you a drooling, whimpering mess.

Michael flipped you over, slipping himself back into you. His hand clasped around your neck, smiling down at you when he saw how defeated you looked. “M-Michael we should really get back before—“ “Shh, baby… They already know with your loud mouth.” Your face darkened, feeling incredibly embarrassed. Michael slammed into you, bringing out a loud breathy moan from inside of you. “You sound so pretty, baby…” He whispered, his hand squeezing around your throat. You whine softly, bucking your hips. “How could you possibly want more? I’m doing my best here…” He mumbled, grabbing onto your hips to thrust into you better. “Mi—chael” You stuttered with each of his thrusts. You bounced against him, hands clenching the bed covers.

“Michael! We need you down here!” Billy yelled from downstairs. “Goddamnit…” Michael cursed, quickening his pace. If he didn’t finish, he was going to get you to, that’s for sure. He never left you unsatisfied. He leaned down to your ear, his fingers rubbing against your clit. “Cum for me, baby… Don’t want to keep them waiting…” He purred. You whined, turning to face him. You grabbed his face, kissing him. Michael closed his eyes, his hand caressing your cheek. Your hips bucked against his fingers, moaning into the kiss.

Michael successfully got you to cum, and even got himself to as well. Win, win. However, you were a complete mess. Your mascara was bleeding down your cheeks, and your lipstick was smeared. “Michael… I didn’t bring a bag to fix this…” You sigh, staring at yourself in the mirror. Michael zoned out staring at you, finding it hot how he managed to create such a masterpiece. “Michael!” You hit him, knocking him out of it. “What?” “I’m not going out there looking like this!” You hissed, “Go find some of Carrie’s makeup for me…” “Why me?!” “Because this is your fault!” “Fine… I’ll be right back…” He sighed, walking off. You roll your eyes, rubbing some soap in your hands until it got bubbly, washing off your face until it was bare.

Michael came back with an assortment of items. Most of it wasn’t even makeup. “God… Um… Okay, yeah… Thank you…” You grabbed the mascara from his hands, and a peachy colored lipstick. You would’ve used her concealer to hide some of the spots you wanted to cover, but you guys weren’t the same skin tone. “You look beautiful, just go without makeup…” Michael assured. “It’s a party, I can’t go without!” You retorted, shoving the items back into his hands to take back. “Jeez, okay Miss grumpy pants.” He mumbled, walking back to Carrie’s bedroom.

——————————————————————————

You and Carrie developed a nice conversation together as the boys set up everything for her. “I had Michael sneak into your room to borrow some of your makeup, I hope that’s okay…” “Oh no worries! I totally get it. I just pray you guys didn’t do it in my parents bedroom.” “We made sure it was vacant… Nothing was in the drawers so.” “Oh, perfect. Thank god… Im pretty sure I locked their room just in case, so there was no getting in there anyways. I’m glad you came! I don’t have to hang by myself. These boys don’t do anything but make fun of me…” She sighed. “We love you though.” Freddy smiled, patting Carrie’s back as he drank from his cup. Freddy wore his usual red and green striped sweater. “Oh whatever.” Carrie rolled her eyes. You giggled, looking around the yard for Michael. “Where did Michael go?” You asked. “Oh he went to get the kegs.” Freddy replied. “Oh… Uh, when will people start showing up?” You felt weird without Michael around, you never hung around his friend’s without him. “Probably in the next five minutes.” Billy came walking over, blatantly drunk already. He giggled, ruffling Carrie’s hair. “Billy you asshole!” Carrie cried out, getting up and running after him.

Freddy took a seat in front of you, looking rather serious. He leaned in close to you, “Don’t worry about Michael tonight alright? We’ll try to keep him under control to the best of our ability. I don’t think anyone wants to see a dead body tonight.” He sighed. You were taken back by his words, not expecting him to bring it up. “Um… Yeah, thank you. He’s um… Not exactly remorseful over last night.” “Yeah we’ve noticed over the past few fights he’s been in. I don’t think he’s fighting for you anymore. It’s something… Darker.” You already knew, but it still brought up fear inside of you. “Why do you think this is happening..?” You whispered. “It’s always been in him. He killed his sister when he was just six years old but attorneys covered it up and sent him right back home.” What..? You thought his sister was alive. “She’s… She’s dead? Michael told me she—“ “Yeah, he tells everyone that she’s at her “boyfriend’s house” and she’s in college so she’s never home… I mean, anythings better than telling people you killed your sister.” Freddy shrugged. “I guess he doesn’t thrust me like I thought he did…” You look down, saddened by the news you received. “It’s not that he doesn’t trust you, he’s just scared of what you’ll think of him. Though after last night, I’m not sure if that’s true anymore. He’s acting it off like it was the usual.” Freddy sighed, rubbing his head. “I’m sorry, Y/N. We’re going to try our best to help him. You just need to be as supportive as you can. He needs it.” Freddy placed his hand on top of yours, “I don’t know what would happen if he didn’t have you, Y/N. A lot more people would be gone from this world, that’s for sure.” He rubbed your hand with his thumb, and stood up. “I gotta go let people in since these dumb fucks are too busy.” Freddy sighed, leaving you alone at the table. You stared at your hands, wondering if Michael had lied to you about anything else.

“The beer is here!” Michael shouted, holding two giant kegs in each arm, “Carrie! Where do you want these at?” “Oh! Just set them over there on that table.” Carrie pointed to the table next to you. Michael walked over, setting them down. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders, kissing your neck gently from behind you. “What’s wrong, baby? Why the sad face?” He continued to kiss your face, rocking you back and forth. “I’m okay. Just thinking.” You smile, turning your head to peck his cheek. “Want something to drink? There’s about everything you could think of.” Michael massaged your shoulders. “No… I’m not going to drink tonight. Someone has to drive us home.” You giggled softly, placing your hands atop his. “You sure? I can play the sober one tonight if you wanna—“ “No… Every time I get drunk I get super emotional and horny. No one wants to see that.” “I do…” Michael mumbled.

The place filled up quickly until there was barely any room to walk around. You stayed at the same table with Michael and his friends. Jason held his cup close, keeping his head down. Freddy had a look of concern on his face as he eyed down everyone at the party, and Billy just sat there flirting with every girl that walked by. Michael had his arm wrapped around your shoulders, drinking the pack of Modelo he brought for himself. He had already gone through four.

“Michael, slow down…” You whisper in his ear, rubbing his back. “I’m fine, baby. I can handle myself.” He kissed the top of your head. “Last time you got drunk you killed someone…” You mumbled. “It won’t happen again.” Michael replied, staring off at everyone in the yard. Somehow you knew he was lying. Freddy knew it too, giving you his same concerned look he’s had for the past hour. Michael’s eyes were dark, looking for his next victim. You saw how his jaw clenched, his teeth grinding in anticipation.

“Michael… Let’s go inside. We can play beer pong.” You nudged his side gently, standing up. “I wanna stay out here.” He replied, not moving from his spot. You sighed, knowing you cant force him. You sat back down, looking over at Freddy. Freddy had his eyes on Michael, wondering what he was going to have to do in a few minutes when Michael decided on his victim. “I’m gonna go get more to drink…” Jason stood up from his seat, walking over to the sodas. Jason never drank, he respected his mother too much, and that was totally fine. Nothing wrong with that. However others thought differently.

You ran your fingers through Michael’s hair, leaning into him. Everyone had quieted down after some bickering came up. Everyone crowded around the area where the sodas were. “Oh fuck…” Freddy hissed, jumping out from his chair, running into the crowd. Michael’s head whipped around, realizing Jason was in trouble. He took off after Freddy, squeezing himself in between people, and shoving some. You and Billy looked at each other in confusion, standing up to see what was going on. Three boys surrounded Jason, one too close for comfort. “What the fuck are you gonna do, freak?” He smiled, pushing himself into Jason.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Michael pushed himself up front, walking over to the situation. The boy pressed up against Jason backed away to look up at Michael properly. “This retard bumped into me!” The boy referred to Jason. “Okay? Why’s that such a big deal? I think your ego is a bit too big for that frail body of yours.” Michael chuckled, pulling Jason behind him. “Frail? Who do you think you’re talking to?” He glared, rolling up his sleeves. Your eyes widened, running into the crowd, pushing people out of the way, whispering quiet apologies as you moseyed on through. “Michael! Don’t do this…” You whispered with pleading eyes. The boy’s eyes lit up when he saw you, a big smile growing on his face. His eyes flicked back to Michael, “this your girl? I feel bad… She’d look a lot better with me.” He snickered.

“Hey man I don’t think you wanna say that… That’s Michael Myers…” One of his friends whispered to him. “So what? All of those stories are bullshit.” He replied. Michael looked like he was about to rip his head off. “Baby, let’s go before you hurt someone…” You grabbed Michael’s arm, trying to pull him away from the area. “What’s this pretty thing doing? You trying to save me? I can handle myself.” He smiled, rubbing his hands together as he eyed you up and down. Michael was fuming at this point. You glared at him, “you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.” You spat, squeezing Michael’s arm. Billy and Freddy forced themselves out of the crowd, pulling Michael out of the circle. Michael didn’t fight back, and went with them, knowing he would damn well kill that boy if they didn’t.

You watched Michael get pulled away, saddened. You didn’t understand why there were people like this who caused fights. You jumped a bit when you felt a hand slither around your waist, getting pulled close to the boy’s body. “My name’s Travis… You must be Y/N huh? I’m sorry your little boy toy over there has anger issues… Poor thing. Have to treat him like a child.” He laughed. You shoved him off of you, grimacing at the feeling he left on you. You heard people gasp, and suddenly Michael burst through the wall of people, grabbing onto Travis’ shoulders, forcefully pinning him to the ground. “Let us through!” You heard Freddy’s voice scream from behind the wall. Your eyes widened, feeling yourself lock up at the sight of Michael’s fist colliding with the boy’s face.

Michael was straddling his torso, pummeling his face. All you could see was blood. Your vision was blurry with the color red. You felt like you couldn’t move a muscle, your entire body in shock. Everyone was rooting for Michael, chanting. However, once they realized Travis was no longer moving they quickly shut up. Everything was growing dark. You saw bright white sparks around you, the black spots clouding your vision. You fell backwards, and everything went black.

——————————————————————————

Your eyes fluttered open, wincing at the bright lights above you. “Hey! She’s awake!” You heard Billy’s voice shout. Someone grabbed your hand, squeezing it. You looked at your side to see Jason smiling at you, holding your hand. You smiled back, quickly met by a piercing pain in your head. You groaned, grabbing your head. “Man! Get her some more morphine, doc!” Billy continued to ramble on about how shitty the doctor was. Where were you? The hospital? Why were you here? “Hey… You feeling alright?” Freddy looked down at you, brushing your hair out of your face. “Where am I?” You grunt, lowering your hands. “The hospital… You passed out and hit your head pretty hard last night.” “Last night? How long have I been out?!” You gasp. “Not sure, I wasn’t counting…” Freddy rubbed the back of his head. You felt an instant ease as one of the nurses gave you more morphine. “Thank you…” You mumbled. “Thank god someone around here does their job…” Billy sat down next to Jason, continuing to complain.

“Where’s Michael..?” You expected him to be here. After all you were in the hospital… Your boyfriend should be here, not his friends. “He’s uh… He’s in custody.” Freddy chuckled. Your eyes widened, “what?” Your voice dropped low. “We haven’t heard the status on that kid Travis yet but he wasn’t moving after Michael had his way with him… Me and Billy tried so hard to get in there and stop it but people kept us out. Apparently a neighbor called the police for a noise complaint… Michael got taken in. He’s in a lot of trouble, Y/N… We’re not sure if he’s coming out of this.” Freddy explained. You felt yourself tear up. Michael just turned twenty. He wasn’t a minor. He couldn’t just slip out of the cop’s grasp. If that kid is dead, Michael may never see the light of day again.

#michael myers #halloween #halloween kills #slashers #michael myers x reader #slashers x reader #headcannons #imagines #michael myers x reader smut #slashers x reader smut

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the-winter-spider · 3 years ago

Text

Marry me: Part 1 | B. Barnes

Warnings: angst

Word Count: 2.5k

Revised Version

Inspired by Marry Me by Thomas Rhett

“Buck?” Steve knocked lightly on the door before turning the knob, pushing it open. “You ready?”

Bucky stood in front of the mirror, smoothing his black suit and straightening his tie. He plastered on a smile—one he knew Steve could see right through, but Steve wouldn’t say anything. “Ready.”

They made their way from their hotel rooms down to where the ceremony was being held. The soft murmur of guests filled the air as Bucky and Steve joined Clint and Bruce in the front row. The rest of the team sat behind them, the absence of the girls and Tony barely registering in Bucky’s mind.

He took a shaky breath as the music started, a familiar tune that made his chest tighten. Everyone stood up, and he felt Steve’s reassuring hand squeeze his shoulder. But the gesture only intensified the ache inside him.

Bucky had always known how much you dreamed of a wedding. You’d talked about it often, your eyes lighting up with every detail. Back then, he couldn’t imagine anyone else up there beside you. It was supposed to be him—holding your hand, promising forever.

But instead, here he was, watching someone else stand where he thought he’d be.Bucky’s vision blurred as memories flooded back. All the what-ifs and could-have-beens weighed heavy on his heart, but he forced himself to stay composed. For Steve, for the team—for the part of him that still believed he had to be strong.

—

“Do you ever wanna get married?”

Bucky’s eyes met hers, a shadow of the man he once was flickering behind them. “I always did, back in the ’40s. But after everything… I don’t know if I deserve it anymore.”

She scoffed, shaking her head. “Buck, if anyone deserves a happy ending, it’s you.”

A faint smile tugged at his lips, more melancholy than anything. “Do you?”

“Of course. I’ve had it planned out for, well, forever.” There was a spark of joy in her eyes as she spoke, the kind he hadn’t seen in a long time. But it dimmed slightly as she continued, her voice tinged with doubt. “But who would want to marry someone with this kind of lifestyle?”

I would marry you right here and now, Bucky thought, the words burning on the tip of his tongue. But he didn’t say them. Instead, he squeezed her hand gently, forcing a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “The right person will, doll.”

He wished she could see what he couldn’t bring himself to say. He willed his eyes to convey everything his voice couldn’t—how much she meant to him, how much he wanted that future with her. But either the stars above weren’t shining bright enough, or maybe, just maybe, she didn’t feel the same way.

The silence between them stretched out, filled with all the things left unsaid. And as they lay under the night sky, Bucky couldn’t help but wonder if he’d ever find the courage to tell her how he really felt, or if it was already too late.

—

First, Sharon walked down the aisle, followed by Wanda, and finally Natasha. With each step they took, Bucky’s heart pounded harder. Every second that passed felt like sand slipping through an hourglass, and with it, the future he once dreamed of was slipping away too. A future that, if not with you, he didn’t want at all.

Then Morgan appeared, skipping her way down the aisle, tossing magnolia petals with a childlike joy. Bucky’s breath hitched as he recognized the flower—your favourite. You’d told him that once, on your tenth mission together. It was a small detail, a fleeting conversation, but he never forgot. Just like he could never forget the way you looked at him when you talked about the things you loved, the way your eyes sparkled with life.

As the petals floated to the ground, Bucky felt the weight of what was about to happen crush him. He’d imagined this moment so many times before, but it was always you walking toward him, not away. The thought of you slipping through his fingers, of losing every chance to tell you how he truly felt, twisted in his chest like a knife.

But this was the reality he faced. A reality where his unspoken words and hidden feelings had brought him here, to this moment of silent regret. And as the music swelled and the guests turned to watch the bride appear, Bucky could only stand there, hands clenched at his sides, heart breaking in a way that no battle or mission had ever managed to do.

—

“Awesome knife action out there, Barnes,” you praised him with a grin. “You’ve gotta show me a thing or two when we get back.”

He nodded, feeling his palms grow sweaty, though not from the adrenaline of the mission. “Anytime, doll.”

The two of you continued your walk back to the quinjet in comfortable silence, the sound of crunching grass beneath your boots the only noise around. But inside, Bucky’s thoughts were anything but quiet. He was caught in an internal battle over his growing feelings for you, trying to figure out how to navigate the tightrope between camaraderie and something more.

Suddenly, your voice broke through his thoughts, startling him. “No fucking way!”

“What? What’s wrong?” he asked, eyes scanning the area for any threats. But when he looked down, he found you kneeling on the ground, a look of pure wonder on your face. The tension drained from his body, replaced by curiosity.

You looked up at him, your eyes wide and shining with that unmistakable glimmer of excitement he’d come to adore. “Magnolias,” you whispered, almost reverently.

“What?”

You laughed, the sound warm and infectious. “They’re my favourite flower.”

Bucky hesitated for a moment before dropping to his knees beside you, his eyes following yours to the delicate blooms. Before now, he would have just passed them by, nothing more than pretty flowers in a field. But hearing they were your favourite made them different—special. They weren’t just flowers anymore; they were a piece of you, another little detail he’d treasure.

For a moment, neither of you spoke. Bucky couldn’t help but wonder how something so simple could make you so happy. He wanted to memorise every part of this moment—the way your eyes lit up, the soft smile playing on your lips, the sound of your laughter. It was these small moments, these fleeting glimpses into your world, that made him fall harder for you every day.

“I’ll remember that,” he finally said, his voice softer than usual.

“Remember what?”

“That magnolias are your favourite.” He glanced at you, trying to keep his tone light. “Maybe I’ll surprise you with some, someday.”

Your smile grew, and for a second, Bucky allowed himself to believe that maybe, just maybe, you could see what he was trying so hard to hide.

As you both stood up to continue toward the quinjet, Bucky knew that from this day forward, every time he saw a magnolia, he’d think of you—and how he wished he could be more than just your teammate.

—

He swallowed the lump in his throat, nearly choking on it when he heard Steve’s shallow gasp beside him. Reluctantly, Bucky dragged his gaze to where everyone’s eyes were now fixed. He already knew you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen, but this—this was different. Watching you walk down that aisle in that white dress was like a punch to the gut. It was everything he feared and everything he tried to prepare himself for, yet it still shattered what was left of his broken heart into pieces too small to ever be put back together.

His breath hitched when Tony shook the hand of the man you were marrying—the man Bucky always thought would be him, should have been him. The world seemed to tilt on its axis, everything moving in slow motion as Tony took a stand next to Bucky. He leaned in close, his voice barely above a whisper. “I thought it was gonna be you.”

Bucky’s heart seized in his chest. What?

The walls felt like they were closing in on him, even though there were none. They were outside, the sun shining down on a perfect day that contrasted so cruelly with the storm raging inside him. Panic clawed at his insides, and he desperately looked anywhere but the altar—anywhere but at you, standing there in the place he always dreamed you’d be with him.

His frantic gaze locked onto Natasha’s across the way. She furrowed her brow, her eyes filled with sadness as she looked at him. She knew. She knew how you felt about him, and she knew how he felt about you. But she’d promised you she wouldn’t meddle, no matter how much she wanted to. She kept that promise, even now, though it was clear how much it pained her to see this unfold.

But all Bucky could think was that it was too late. Too late to change anything, too late to tell you the truth. He was losing you forever, and the worst part was knowing that he never even fought for the chance to make you his.

As the ceremony began, Bucky stood there, trying to hold himself together, knowing that with each word spoken, he was watching his last chance at happiness slip away.

—

“Just tell him, Y/N. I can’t take this anymore,” Natasha said, exasperation clear in her voice.

You shook your head quickly, panic flashing in your eyes. “No, Nat. We’re just friends, that’s all we’ll ever be. He doesn’t feel the same way, trust me.”

Natasha groaned, rolling her eyes dramatically. “You are impossible. We fought literal aliens last month, and you won’t walk across the hall to tell your best friend that you’re in love with him?”

You gave her a cheeky smile, trying to deflect. “Exactly… If it’s meant to be, it’ll be.”

Natasha made a gagging noise, sticking her finger in her mouth. “That’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said.”

You laughed, but the sound was strained. The truth was, you were terrified. Telling Bucky how you felt could change everything, and the thought of losing him—even as just a friend—was too much to bear. So, you hid behind your optimism, hoping that one day, things would fall into place on their own.

“Promise me you won’t meddle, Nat. Please,” you said, your voice softening as you met her gaze.

Natasha sighed, her frustration giving way to a reluctant smile. “Yeah, yeah, I promise. But for the record, you’re both idiots.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, even as a pang of guilt twisted in your chest. Deep down, you knew Natasha was right. But for now, you’d cling to the hope that if it was meant to be, it really would be.

—

He loosened his tie, hoping it would help him breathe, but it did little to ease the tightness in his chest. How was it that this moment felt like it was speeding by, yet dragging on forever? His eyes finally landed on you, standing just a few feet away, your hands in his. Some agent from three floors down—a guy Bucky barely knew. He should have been happy for you, but all he could think was that you were too good for him, too good for anyone.

When you first told Bucky about him, he never imagined it would turn into anything serious. He doesn’t know why he thought that—any guy would be lucky just to spend time with you. But Bucky, in his foolishness, convinced himself that it was just a fling, something that would fizzle out after a few dates. He’d been so sure that eventually, you’d realise you were meant to be with him.

But that never happened. Instead, Bucky let the days turn into months, and the months into years, all while you moved on with your life. He was stupid to think you’d wait three years for him to man up and tell you how he felt. And now, here you were, marrying someone else—someone who hadn’t hesitated to show you that you were worth it.

It hit him then, harder than any punch he’d ever taken, that you deserved better. Better than waiting for a man who couldn’t find the courage to say what he really felt. Better than wasting your time on someone like him. Bucky’s chest tightened again, the realisation crushing. You shouldn’t have had to wait, and now it was too late. Girls like you should never be kept waiting.

And as you stood there, a vision of everything Bucky had ever wanted but never believed he deserved, he knew he’d carry the weight of this regret for the rest of his life.

—

“I met someone.”

Bucky’s hand froze mid-air, the fork slipping from his grasp and clattering onto his plate, the sound echoing through the kitchen. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” you said with a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “His name’s Dean. He’s an agent three floors down.”

Bucky forced a casual bite of his garlic bread, swallowing hard to push down the wave of emotions threatening to surface. “Three floors? Didn’t know we associated with agents that low.”

You laughed, reaching across the table to give his shoulder a playful shove. “Ha ha, James. Very funny.” You twirled your pasta around your fork, your smile growing softer. “I think you’d like him.”

“What makes you say that, doll?”

“He’s a lot like you.”

Bucky’s chest tightened at your words. He wished he was the man you were talking about, the one who could make you smile like that. But instead, he could only nod, hiding the ache behind a thin veil of indifference.

And as you took another bite, you tried to ignore the pang of regret deep down, wishing that the man you were talking about was Bucky.

—

He watched your lips move, but the words were lost to him. All he could hear was the relentless thumping of his heart and the rushing of blood in his ears. It wasn’t until your eyes found him that everything snapped back into focus, the sound of the world crashing in around him.

Your future husband was reciting his vows, but you were staring at Bucky, and he was staring right back. He swore he saw your bottom lip tremble before you looked away, laughing at something Dean said.

“Do you, Dean, take Y/N to be your wife?”

“I do.”

Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

“Do you, Y/N, take Dean to be your husband?”

You paused, your voice caught in your throat. Bucky could see you struggling, the hesitation clear in your eyes. Dean squeezed your hand gently, ready to place the ring on your finger and seal your future together. But your gaze drifted back to Bucky, and the silence that followed was deafening.

The officiant cleared his throat, trying to break the tension. “Do you, Y/N, take Dean to be your husband?”

“I—”

#bucky barnes #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky banres x y/n #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x stark!reader #marvel fanfiction #Spotify #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barns x reader #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barns x y/n #bucky barnes x reader angst #fluffy bucky barnes x reader

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jekde04 · 3 years ago

Text

Of Sudden Rains and Lasting Promises

Pairing: Gruvia (Gray Fullbuster & Juvia Lockser) Fandom: Fairy Tail Genre: Romance Word Count: 2,254 words Summary: She had been fairly good at controlling the rain and not letting her emotions influence it too much. But there were a couple of instances in the past that it went out of hand–and it always involved one person. Just like how it did now. Prompt: Tears (Day 4 of Gruvia Week 2021, but I'm so late I don't want to tag it as such anymore lol) Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 You may also read it on FanFiction.net and AO3! Check out my master list for other Gruvia fics. Tag list (I'm so sorry I totally forgot to tag you in my last few fics!): @shampooneko @fbflame94 @juviaafullbuster @unvalley @gruviaftw11 (Wanna be tagged, lemme know)

She didn't mean to make it rain. But thank heavens it was just a drizzle.

It had been a while since it last happened. She had been fairly good at controlling the rain and not letting her emotions influence it too much. But there were a couple of instances in the past that it went out of hand–and it always involved one person.

Just like how it did now.

Juvia wiped the thin streaks of rain pelting her face. She decided to sit on the park bench right under a big oak tree, but the rain must be getting stronger now because the thick canopy of leaves had become inadequate to protect her. She heard a man curse and remark how annoying the sudden rain was as he hastened to pack up the magazines and newspapers he was selling.

She was the gloomy rain woman once again.

"You shouldn't be out under the rain like that."

A hand holding a familiar pink umbrella appeared beside her, shielding her from the worsening downpour. She didn't need to look to know who it was.

"How did Gray-sama get Juvia's umbrella?"

"You left it in the guild, so I borrowed it for myself," Gray said as he moved to sit beside her, all the while not letting the shade of the umbrella leave her head. He moved his damp bangs away from his eyes and ruffled his hair to shake the droplets off.

"Gray-sama can use Juvia's umbrella. No need to ask Juvia," she muttered. She could feel Gray inching closer to her to make sure they're both under the umbrella, their arms and legs touching.

"I know. I just happened to see you here, and it's kinda unfair to keep the umbrella for myself while the owner is getting drenched."

Juvia looked at him, his chiseled profile matching the perpetual frown on his face. She already knew how handsome he was, yet her heart still beat fast every time she looked at him.

But she also couldn't help that sinking feeling in her chest when she remembered what she overheard earlier. She sighed.

"You okay?" he asked her.

"Hmm-mmm," Juvia answered. She wondered if she should ask him or just let him broach the subject. Finally, she decided to just stay in comfortable silence as the rain poured in a steady rhythm.

"Juvia?"

"Yes?"

"There's something I've been meaning to tell you."

There it is, she thought, but she didn't dare hope. It could be something else.

"Juvia is listening."

A long pause, with nothing but the incessant downpour and the few people out and about being all that they could hear.

"I'm going on a quest with my team." When Juvia didn't say anything, he continued, "It's gonna take a while."

Really, it shouldn't hurt like this. Mages like them go on quests all the time.

But this one was different, she knew.

"Juvia knows. Everyone was talking about it at the guild." She looked at him while he continued to stare straight ahead as if counting each drop of rain. "You're doing Gildarts-san's failed quest, right? The one that hasn't been solved for 100 years."

"Yes."

What was a previously light shower started to transform into heavier rain, bigger drops falling from the sky and making plop-plop noises on the umbrella shielding them. She could feel drops hitting the right side of her body, and she knew that it would only be a matter of time before the wetness would start to seep through her thick clothes.

She felt Gray squeeze closer to her and reposition the umbrella to cover her entire body. Glancing at him, she noticed that half of his body was getting drenched by the sudden heavy downpour.

"Gray-sama, you're getting wet," she said as she moved even closer to him, grabbing the umbrella and trying to cover him better.

"Don't worry about me," he told her, moving his arm around her shoulders so that they could fit under the umbrella better. The sudden warm sensation as Gray practically embraced her lit Juvia's pale cheeks with a pink tinge, but she couldn't bring herself to say more to him.

After a few beats, he said, "I'm sorry you had to hear it from other people. I was planning to tell you, you know."

Despite the dark clouds in the sky and her heart, Juvia couldn't help but smile. At least Gray wasn't planning to just leave her in the dark this time, like what he did when he disappeared without a trace for six months. The thought of it made tears well in her eyes, and she hastily wiped them with the back of her hand, lest the rain worsened.

Gray looked at her, concern written all over his face. "Hey, you can say no if you don't want me to leave."

At this, Juvia looked at him, her eyes wide. "What?"

"If you're not fine with it, I won't go."

"Is Gray-sama asking Juvia's permission to go on a mission?" she asked, not believing what she was hearing.

Gray blushed and looked away from her. He shrugged. "Maybe."

"But why?"

"Well, you are..." Gray swallowed, as if a thick lump had formed in his throat. "You are... my… my friend. And what you think is important to me."

She should have been sad to be called just a "friend," but for some reason, Juvia felt warmth spread in her chest. Gray wasn't particularly good with his words, but he always made up for it in his actions.

And now, he was actually considering her feelings. Ready to throw away the chance to go on a once-in-a-lifetime quest if she said so.

"Does Gray-sama want to go?"

His brows creased in thought, and it took him a moment before he answered. "Yeah, I think so. There's a part of me that wants to stay, but a bigger part of me wants to get stronger."

Juvia furrowed her brows as she looked up at him. "But Gray-sama is already very strong. Juvia knows she says this a lot, but you really are one of the strongest mages she knows."

"I'm not planning to be the strongest out there," he said. "I just want to be strong enough to protect the people that matter to me."

Juvia rolled her eyes. "Everyone at Fairy Tail can protect themselves. You have nothing to worry about."

"I'm not talking about Fairy Tail," Gray answered, his gaze darting once again to the empty rain-drenched street. She may just have imagined it, but she thought she saw his cheeks darken as he tightened his grip on her shoulder.

"There is... someone... I cherish. Someone I almost lost before. I don't want that to happen again. I want to be strong, so I can keep her safe."

It was so unusual for Gray to talk about his feelings that it left Juvia dumbfounded. Of course, she didn't want to assume or make Gray uncomfortable, but…

What the hell. He was leaving soon, and she had to let him know how much he mattered to her. One more time.

"Juvia is sure that whoever that someone is, she already thinks Gray-sama is wonderful and more than enough," she said. And in a lower voice, she added, "And she believes that her love for him won't change whether he's the strongest mage on Earthland or just an ordinary man without powers. Because she loves him just the way he is right now."

She sneaked a peek at Gray, whose eyes she couldn't see behind his bangs, but his cheeks had definitely turned a dark shade of red. And maybe it was just her imagination again, but was that a shadow of a smile appearing on his face?

The rain was finally letting up, the dark clouds gradually going away. Yet the two of them remained huddled under Juvia's umbrella. Gray started to subconsciously play with the tips of her hair, curling and uncurling them on his fingers. Not that she minded, though.

"I know that. After all, she's the kindest person I know," Gray said. "That is why I want to be the best version of myself. For her. I don't want to be anything less because she deserves only the best."

Juvia could feel the heat rising to her cheeks, but she fought it and willed herself not to boil or turn into a puddle. The dark clouds were all gone now, replaced by the sun's rays taking a peek from the clouds and giving an ethereal sheen to their surroundings.

"Gray-sama is so sweet. Whoever she is, she's one lucky girl."

"Trust me, I'm luckier," Gray said, grinning at her. Then, realizing that the rain had stopped and the sun was out, he closed the umbrella and stood up, stretching his hand for Juvia to grab.

"I guess someone's feeling less sad now?" he asked, and Juvia blushed.

She took Gray's hand, and he intertwined their fingers as they started walking towards Fairy Hills. "How did Gray-sama know?"

"Let's just say I also have a Juvia-radar that tells me when you need a bit of cheering up," Gray told her, and Juvia couldn't help the swarm of butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

Maybe it was due to their interlocked hands and the way his thumb mindlessly caressed her knuckles. Or perhaps the fact that he was walking her home, though he had been doing that for quite some time now. Or maybe it was because of how well he knew her–and actually cared about her.

It was all of the things he had said and done… and even all the unsaid ones that brought unparalleled joy in her heart. Because she felt… no, she knew that she was loved. Deeply and completely.

But she had to ask him one more thing.

"Gray-sama?'

"Hmm?"

"Can you promise... that certain someone... one thing?"

"What is it?"

"Promise her you'll come back."

Gray chuckled. "Of course. I promise I'll come back home to her, no matter what. I will come back as a man worthy of her love. "

She squeezed his hand, and he squeezed back, and they continued walking hand-in-hand, no words needed.

They were at the gate of Fairy Hills when Gray spoke again.

"Juvia?"

"Yes, Gray-sama?"

He had stopped walking and faced her. "Wait for me, will you?"

A bright blush bloomed on her cheeks. Gray had always been indirect with her, yet here he was, asking her (and not a certain someone) to wait for him.

As if there would be any other answer.

"Always, Gray-sama."

And, in a moment of boldness, she tiptoed and kissed him on the cheek, her lips lingering for a second before letting him go. She caught sight of his reddened cheeks before he turned his face away and awkwardly patted her head with his free hand.

"We won't be leaving until the end of the week, so, um... would you like to... spend some time with me?"

Juvia's eyes sparkled. "Is Gray-sama asking Juvia out on a–"

"Not a date!" Gray quickly interrupted. "Just, um, hanging out with each other since I'm going away and we're not going to see each other for a long time."

Juvia smiled knowingly. Nothing would change her mind that Gray was asking her out on a date, but of course, she would let him believe that they were just "hanging out" if that was what he wanted.

"Let Juvia think." She crossed her arms over her chest and tapped a finger on her chin. "Hmm, Juvia wants to eat caramade franks, go fishing–"

"You wanna go fishing? We can do that."

"Really? Juvia's so happy! She was told it's always raining around her, so she can't be taken fishing or camping or–"

"Who said that? That's a load of crap," Gray said, irritated. "Tell me and I'll punch his brains out."

Juvia placed a hand on his arm. "Not important, Gray-sama." She smiled and added, "Tomorrow, then?"

Gray nodded. And before she knew what was happening, she felt Gray pulling her body close to him, her hat yanked away from her head, and Gray's lips suddenly on her forehead. Her hands landed on his bare chest, and she could feel his heartbeat thumping loudly, probably as strong as the beating of her heart at the moment.

It ended as fast as it happened, and she found herself being pushed away by a flustered Gray, mumbling, "See you tomorrow!" As he hurriedly walked away from her, Juvia finally broke from her trance and had enough sense to shout, "Gray-sama, your clothes!"

"Crap!"

Juvia giggled as Gray picked up his discarded clothes and started wearing them, still a bit of pink coloring his cheeks. When he was done, he hastily waved goodbye to her and shouted, "Tomorrow!"

She watched his retreating form until he was no longer within her line of sight. Her heart ached a bit, knowing that he was going away soon, but it swelled with the promise that he would eventually come home to her–a better, stronger, and more confident man.

How that was even possible, she didn't know, as he was already perfect in her eyes. But she also hadn't imagined that she could even love him more, yet here she was, finding herself loving him a little bit more each day as he ever-so-slowly let her into his melting heart.

Clutching her hat to her heart, she entered Fairy Hills.

A/N: I'm still writing Gruvia Week fics? You bet I am! It would be a waste if I don't flesh out those drafts I did before, right? Thank you for still reading my fics. I appreciate them a lot and you inspire me to keep writing. Btw, the fishing thing is a reference to the FT 100 YQ chapter 11 cover. And also to what Bora said to Juvia once. :)

#gruvia #gruvia fanfic #gruvia fanfiction #gray x juvia #gray fullbuster #juvia lockser #fairy tail

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suchalonelysunflower · 4 years ago

Text

Babylon (l.h)

End Up Here -Part 5

Pairing: Luke Hemmings x 5sos! Fem! Reader

Summary: A lot has happened and too many things were left unsaid. Even after a month they still find ways to be in each others mind.

Warnings: Angst and smut. Mentions of vioence, physical abuse, mental abuse, sexual abuse, harassment, cheating, fighting, sexism, frustrations, alcohol. Language and some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word count : 10.1 k

Author’s Note: I cried a lot writing this, so I’m sorry. Final Part coming up March 16th! Remember that Reblogs, Feedback, Comments and Likes are very important! You have no idea how much they help me ❤️ Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🦋🌻✨

My Materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

Series Materialist || part 1 || part 2 || part 3 || part 4

Liked by banksmadden, 5soslover55 and 1,750,316 others

yn5sos how did I end up here?

View all 55,432 comments

ashtonirwin who’s there with you?

hater7 pathetic

ynfan2 LEAVE HER ALONE PLEASE

5sosfan9 this is so irresponsible. I thought you were better.

↪️ yn5sos me too

“OUT OF CONTROL: Singer Y/N L/N seeing partying once again after the concert. L/N was last seen with a crowd of people, none of which were her bandmates”

“Sensitive, are we? On their last concert, Y/N L/N from the band 5 Seconds of Summer was caught running away from the stage mid-show, leaving her poor bandmates Calum Hood and Michael Clifford to finish the song for her. L/N came back minutes later to finish the show. Videos show the singer crying along to the love songs”

“5SOS BREAKING UP? SINGER Y/N L/N GOING M.I.A ON BAND’S SOCIAL MEDIA LEAVES FANS CONFUSED AND WORRIED”

“Y/N?!” Ashton kept banging at the door. His patience ran thin as the girl refused to answer “Y/N! C’mon!”

“She’s still not answering?” A voice called behind him.

Calum and Michael were already dressed up, ready for another day of interviews in a foreign language. Ashton assumed that the girls were already downstairs waiting for them.

The older man shook his head, frustration clear on his face as he kept banging on the door like it was his drums.

“Y/N, I will break down the door if you don’t open it!”

It wasn’t an empty promise. They could pay the hotel after but he’d be damned if something happens to Y/N.

She hasn’t been herself since Luke left. When they came back from doing promo that day they were met with the news of him leaving. Y/N didn’t leave her room that whole day.

They were mad, furious even, with Luke. All the things they warned him about were thrown down the drain. They told them not to believe the media and to talk to Y/N but he did none of those things, he only made it worse for all of them, especially the girl who was now spending half the tour absent-minded over heartbreak.

She told them several times that she was fine “I asked him to leave” She would say. But they know better than to believe her right away when she says those stuff, not after that night when she told them the truth about Madden. They swore never to make that mistake again, but history was repeating itself! Only this time it was ten times worse.

Y/N would go out every night after the show, no matter in which part of the world they found themselves in. She was determined to drown herself in alcohol rather than self-pity. They tried to spot her several times but she wouldn’t listen, so they agreed that at least one of them would accompany her whenever she went out just to make sure that she is safe and that she doesn’t go too far.

Last night, however, it was Michael’s turn but Beth felt sick so he couldn't go. He texted Calum, but he was already asleep so he didn’t see the message. Ashton was out with Dani for a date night and when he came back he found Michael in the lobby asking for some medicine for Beth’s stomach and when Calum answered their call with a sleepy voice they realized that Y/N was alone.

And now she wouldn’t answer the door.

“Y/N, I swear to God!”

“Why do you gotta bring the lord into this?”

The three men turned around and found Y/N standing next to them. Her hair was messy and her makeup was smudged, but his eyes remained empty as she looked at them quizzically.

“Were you already downstairs this whole time?!” Ashton asked, raising his voice. Y/N cringed as she shushed him.

“Ugh, could you talk any louder? My head is killing me”

Calum looked at his friend up and down, realizing what was happening “You just came back, didn’t you?”

All three of them turned their heads to her, unable to believe what was in front of them. This wasn’t the Y/N they knew. She was never like this, ever.

Y/N rolled her eyes at the sad, angry, and pitiful looks of her friends. She didn’t need to answer what was obvious.

“Where were you all this time?” Michael asked “We were worried sick”

“Wow, thanks dad,” She said with sarcasm, walking towards her door as she tried to find her key somewhere along with her pockets “I was at the bar. Did you know they open 24 hs? There’s no such thing as the last call here! I love this country”

She let out a little squeal of joy when she finally found her key, pushing Ashton out of the way with the side of her body as she inserted it on the lock.

“We have an interview in 30 minutes!” He reminded her.

“Yeah, your girl told me that downstairs” She answered before she started to close the door “Have fun with that”

But before she could close it completely, Ashton’s foot got in the way.

“You can’t keep doing this, Y/N,” He said with a serious tone, ignoring the pain of the door hitting his foot, still trying to close on him.

Y/N pushed a little harder “I want to sleep, Ashton. Good night”

“No! Goddammit, Y/N. This has gone too far!”

She opened the door, making Ashton trip, and almost fell to the floor in front of her. She was beyond pissed as she began to talk.

“No! Everything has already gone too far, I’m just catching up!” She spat loudly, making the boys look at her in surprise “Madden went too far, the media went too far, the industry went too far and Luke went too far. And I let them crash into me like I’m just a bystander, waiting to pick up the pieces they left of me! So excuse me for finally doing whatever they thought I did. Forgive me for catching up to this fucked up world and finally live up to their false expectations! But I’m not allowed to break down, not right now and probably not ever! So I will keep running. Maybe that way, if I catch up, they’ll leave me the fuck alone” Her eyes filled with tears as she spoke, but she will not cry in front of them. Not anymore “So, good fucking night”

Ashton closed his eyes when he felt the wind of the door slamming inches away from his face. He raised his hand to knock again, but soon he let it fall with a sigh.

He turned around to face the guys and they all had the same hurt expression, not because she hurt them, but because she was hurting herself. They all thought she was doing it unconsciously, but now it was rather obvious that she knew exactly what she was doing.

Y/N is destroying herself because there’s almost nothing left of her. So she’s speeding up the process.

“We can’t leave her like that” Michael said in a whisper, none of them were looking at the door right now, all their eyes were set on the floor as they contemplated their options.

“Well, she doesn’t want to see us. That’s for fucking sure” Calum murmured.

The three men stood in silence in the hallway. Breathing heavily from time to time as their minds tried to find a way to reach out to Y/N before it was too late.

“We have to do something” Michael broke the silence again, fidgeting with his fingers as he met the worried eyes of his two best friends “The fans are already saying that she’s going to leave the band and-“

“No,” Ashton interrupted him, clenching his jaw as the headlines of the articles ran through his mind “We are not letting that happen”

“But what if she wants to?”

“Then that’s not our Y/N/N,” He said “And I refuse to lose her this way or in any way, for that matter”

After a few minutes, it was clear that Y/N was not coming out of her room any time soon. So the boys had to get downstairs to get to the interviews, already thinking about excuses to justify her absence once again.

They wanted to stay with her, but management was already being too hard on them as it is, and they didn’t want Y/N to pay the consequences if they didn’t show up to at least one promo interview. So they had no choice but to leave her alone in her room.

Once the elevator doors opened, the three of them were met with the worried eyes of their girlfriends who quickly met up with them halfway.

“How is she doing? She didn’t speak to us when she came through the doors” Bethany explained as she stood next to Michael, grabbing his hand in comfort.

Ashton just shook his head.

“We talked,” Kat said with a sigh “We decided that we are staying here with her”

“What?”

“You’ll be fine in the interviews without us, but she needs someone. Even if we just wait for her in the lobby all day. Someone needs to check up on her” Kat continued.

“She’s lonely,” Danielle followed, “Even if she doesn’t want to admit it. She’s hurting too much for words to even describe”

The boys knew they were right. Even if Y/N doesn’t want to, they will still be there for her every step of the way. They were not going to leave her to drown.

“Thank you,” Ashton said, truthfully “But there’s gotta be something else we could do for her… just standing by and keeping an eye on her while she wastes away is just…”

He couldn’t finish the sentence, he didn’t need to. They all knew what he was referring to; that damn feeling of helplessness and hopelessness.

“We’ll figure something out,” Calum said confidently “We are not going to give up on her”

There was nothing much to do back in L.A. as Luke found out when he stepped out of the plane almost a month ago. His life has completely changed since he met her and now… Now she was gone and he was left with nothing.

It was his own fault, that’s what he reminded himself every single day since the morning Y/N asked him to leave. He acted on emotions rather than with reason, angry with the world that allowed him to get close to her just to rip her out of his hands the moment he realized his mistakes. He should’ve listened, should’ve fought, should’ve stayed. He should’ve done a lot of things and now he doesn’t even have the chance to fix it.

He hasn’t checked anything about Y/N since he came back. No articles, no tweets, no posts… nothing. He feels as if he didn’t have the right anymore. He never had the right to do it from the beginning, not without letting them fill his brains with lies that eventually left him in pieces.

How could he? How could he let all those things get to him? Everyone told him to ignore them, not to believe the lies that were written for the clicks and the gossip. He knew the truth, he lived with it, and yet, he had turned on her the second it had become too much.

Y/N was a private person and Luke could never understand why. Why if she was so private with her life did every news article write about her? They were all lies. And if he had at least an ounce of decency he would’ve realized that sooner and stand by her side instead of siding with the media. Yet, those thoughts were sticking with him at the back of his head, haunting him even in his sleep.

How easy it was for him to turn away from her. How easy it was for him to leave her. But how hard it was to ignore the love he feels for her, knowing that she won’t take him back and with good reason. Y/N deserves better, in every way, shape, or form. She was such a bright light in such a dark world, and he just hopes she will be strong enough to see it someday, even if he’s not by her side anymore.

God, he was just a fucking idiot.

And now, as he walked past the coffee shop where they first met while he fought the urge to cry again, he was willing to beat himself up for it. For losing the only person he cared about just because he wasn’t brave enough to fight for her as he should’ve. There wasn’t anything that didn’t remind him of Y/N, nothing he could do to shake the self-inflicted pain he caused, so he thought better than to let it consume him.

Luke sat on an empty bench near the campus, his classes didn’t start until a month from today but he longed for some kind of distraction. Once he settled, he took out his notebook and started writing. He doesn’t write about love anymore, rather he wrote about the loss of it while still mourning it fresh on the flesh. Finally understanding what Ashton meant when he said that heartbreak breaks you, and, for a moment, he thought about how she might feel at this moment; if she, at least once, thought of him with something wasn’t hate.

He spent hours sitting outdoors, writing as if his time were to end at any moment. He wrote letters of forgiveness, poems of grief, and free thoughts of the guilt he was feeling. He didn’t mention her, but they were all about and for her. For his Y/N who was now a world away and who he will not call his ever again.

It must’ve been late when his phone started to ring; the streetlights were starting to lit up the pavement as the sun started to set, leaving soft shades of pink and purple to cover up the sky. He didn’t know the number, so he let it ring thinking it might be just one company trying to sell him something he didn’t need.

But the unknown caller was relentless; calling and calling until Luke decided to answer after the fourth time.

“Hello?” He said, annoyed by the interruption. He didn’t want to talk to anyone; not like he had anyone to talk to, after all.

“You fucker” The voice at the other end said. Luke froze when he recognized it.

“A-Ashton?”

“Were you expecting the fucking queen?” He sounded angry and even through the phone he left Luke completely intimidated as he sunk into his seat.

“How - Whose number is this?” Luke asked, knowing he had all their numbers saved in his phone.

“Would you have answered if you saw my name on the screen?” He wouldn’t, they both know it. But at the same time…

“Why are you calling me?” He finally muttered, his head wrapped around the only reason Ashton, out of all people, would be calling him. He knew it was not to catch up “Is Y/N okay?! Did something happen to her?!”

Something must be terribly wrong if Ashton was calling him. That man was very protective over his best friend and Luke was sure he would’ve killed him if he found him the day where he yelled at her, knowing that Y/N must’ve told him everything. He knew Y/N was not going to forgive him and neither will the boys for that matter. That day he lost more than just his girl.

Ashton laughed without any kind of humor “No, she’s not. Of course, she’s not! You happened to her, mate. I don’t know what the fuck you did but she hasn’t been the same since you left.”

Luke’s eyes widened “She didn’t tell you?”

If he thought about it, it really wasn’t that surprising. Y/N never talked about her problems with him, but the boys always knew everything, them being the only people she knew she could trust with her whole heart. Luke had always been jealous of that, but once he found out the truth of why she kept some things for herself he understood why she could only trust her bandmates with it. He immediately thought that she would tell them everything, every word he said and the hateful words he wrote, but she didn’t and that could not mean anything good.

“She told us enough. That you believed the lies of her and Madden and didn’t let her explain before you lashed out and she asked you to leave. Not a single detail about it, only that you were gone and were not coming back. I guess she didn’t want us to kick your ass, but Luke, you better be certain that-”

“I know!” Luke said with a sigh “I deserve it”

“Dude, what the fuck did you do to her?”

How could he tell him? How could he mutter the courage to tell one of his best friends how he absolutely fucked up? Ashton would hate him, with every reason in the world he should hate him. Luke just hoped that he didn’t.

He, Calum, and Michael were the only friends he knew since he met Y/N. They took him in, welcomed him into the group with gritted teeth with the only condition to never hurt their friend. And after a year of being friends, he broke not only Y/N’s trust but theirs as well. And the fact that Y/N didn’t tell them what he’d done seemed cruel because now he had to. Breaking more hearts than their own.

“I fucked up, Ash” Luke muttered, rubbing his eyes with his fingertips as he crouched forward on the bench and placing his elbows on the top of his thighs, getting ready to face the consequences of his actions “I fucked up badly. I was just- You saw those articles, you saw those tweets and those photos. She never talked about him so I thought… What was I supposed to think? She had a reputation, and with the way, she acted the night before it all made sense to me. So I snapped”

“Luke, I swear to GOD if you touched her-”

“NO! God no, I would never!” Luke quickly stated, horrified at the thought of ever hitting her. He was not like that. He would never be like that “But the things I said to her… fuck, Ash. I threw everything in her face, called her a whore and a cheater without giving her a chance to explain herself. I was so fucking angry and she didn’t say a word. She took all of it in silence and I kept going, even when she begged me to stop I kept going... I didn’t know. You must know that I didn’t know what happened to her or her past with Madden. If I knew then I would’ve never-”

“But you did”

Ashton's words were simple, but they cut deeper than a knife through Luke’s heart. He never heard him sound so disappointed and angry. It reminded him of her and the last words she said to him.

“Luke, this girl has been through so much and you still went and dragged her through the mud just to hurt her”

“I didn’t want to-”

“Don’t fucking interrupt me” Ashton barked into the phone “You did. She gave you everything she could give and you threw it on her face like it was nothing without a chance to explain herself. And it’s not like she could run off, turn off her comments and go back to a normal life! I have never seen Y/N so broken since-” He stopped “What did she tell you?”

Luke knew he was referring to Madden. He remembers her face covered in tears, lips trembling and body shaking as she told him what happened in that relationship. He finally saw the hurt and scars that covered her soul.

“She told me what she could”

Ashton sighed “Then you must know that she would never go back to him,” He said, Luke could tell by his voice that he was hurting, too “He met her at a concert in our second world tour as a solo act. He is the son of a very famous producer and they hit it off right away. We didn’t know exactly when things turned for the worse, but we knew something was happening. She would cover herself more, never hanging out with us unless he was present, she wouldn’t eat in front of him or talk to any of us directly unless it was something about work and that still pissed him off. We all heard the rumors of him cheating on her, but she always dismissed them saying that he loved her and he would never do that. I still wonder what other things we didn’t know that she’s still processing.

It wasn’t until the night he almost killed her that we understood the severity of it. She came by my house while I and the others were hanging out. She was bleeding all over herself, her face was covered in blood just as her shirt and pants. It was terrifying; I don’t remember ever driving that far to the hospital, paying the nurses to keep quiet because she kept asking to keep it a secret. That bastard broke her nose and one of her ribs. She had bruises on her arms, stomach, eye, inner thighs, and legs and a cut over her eyebrow. She lost a lot of blood on her way to my house so Calum had to donate some of his because she needed a transfusion. She stayed in the hospital overnight; the next morning we filed a restraining order against Madden and she moved in with me that same day, promising herself and to us that she would never let someone do that again to her. We promise we would never let anything happen to her from that moment on”

Luke was shedding silent tears at Ashton’s story, all the things he imagined happened to her didn’t compare to the reality she suffered. And he only made it worse.

“She was never the same after that” Ashton continued “Until you came into the picture”

Ashton could hear Luke crying over the phone, his sniffs had given him away. But he knew he needed to hear this; he needed to know.

“We didn’t want you to get close to her, afraid you might hurt her the same way Madden did, but she insisted that you were different, that you were a good guy. And against our better judgment, we believed her. We never expected that little by little, we would get our Y/N/N back. She was smiling again, laughing and singing songs about the love we never thought she’d be able to sing again. It was so obvious that she loved you that we couldn't do anything about it but be happy for her, you brought her back to us.

I guess Madden saw that and didn’t like it, that’s why he came to see her that night. We don’t know much about what happened there or what he said to her, but she was shaking when she came back. All she said was that he cornered her, threatened her and called the paparazzi that worked for his father to take pictures of them, and since we were not in America, there was nothing the restraining order to do to help her”

“He did what?!” Luke shouted at the phone, fuming over the fact that that fucker decided to get close to her when she was vulnerable. He promised that if he ever saw him he’d kill him.

“Now you care about what happened?” Ashton asked in return, frustration lacing his voice at Luke’s sudden feeling of protection “Luke, she called you over ten times that day as she was breaking down in the green room. She asked us all if we could get ahold of you because the driver came back without you. She was so fucking scared and you weren’t there when she needed you by her side. So don’t you fucking dare get offended right now. It already happened and you weren’t there”

Ashton was right. Luke had no right to be furious at the moment, given that he was the one who abandoned her deliberately when he saw the pictures of her and her abuser. He had the excuse of ignorance, but that wasn’t enough. It never has, not it ever will be, because his girlfriend needed him at the time and he left her alone.

He cried into the phone, not caring if Ashton could listen or not. He was so fucking angry at himself, at Madden, at the world… He was supposed to protect her, he said he would and then he gave the final punch. He failed her because of his insecurities.

“I’m sorry” He cried, but Ashton was having none of that.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing for”

“She doesn’t want to-”

“Listen to me you shit” Ashton hissed into the phone “I don’t care what you think she wants. She is destroying herself over the fact that the last person she thought would hurt her left her because he chose to believe the lies of the media over his own girlfriend”

Luke’s heart broke all over again “She’s what?”

“Oh my god, how dense are you, dude? Now you decide to ignore the gossip?! She’s been going out all night, drinking herself to death and refusing help from any of us. She is slowly killing herself by killing her soul” He sounded worried, scared even, as he muttered the last words “We are losing her”

“Wh-what can I do?” Luke asked helplessly. Not being able to bear the thought of Y/N being gone.

“We booked you a flight. Figure it out and don’t make us regret it”

“Forgetting the lyrics again? Y/N L/N surely knows how to displease an audience”

“Y/N L/N MISSES YET ANOTHER INTERVIEW AFTER PAPARAZZI CAUGHT HER AT A PARTY THE NIGHT BEFORE”

“What is going on with YN?”

He arrived late to the hotel, having his flight delayed for a few hours, and the boys were already waiting for him in the lobby. Luke took a deep breath as he spotted them from afar, they were talking among them, concerned looks covering their expressions as they looked through their phone.

Luke walked up to them, mustering enough courage to say “Hi,”

The three men turned towards the blonde, Calum quickly walking up to him and punching him in the face, caught Luke by surprise as he backed up holding his nose and looking at Calum with widened, surprised eyes.

“That’s for hurting my best friend, you asshole!” He said, making the other guests look in their direction.

Luke hissed as he made sure he wasn’t bleeding “Thank you. I deserved that” He said, blinking twice “But to be honest I was expecting Ashton to deliver the blow”

“Calum won at rock, paper, scissors” Ashton shrugged “But that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. We still need to have a serious talk and I might punch you there”

Luke nodded, understanding that he did not only fail Y/N, but he also failed them. He promised them that he would take care of their best friend and they believed him. They even helped them get together and served as trust advisers for Luke about what it means to date a celebrity and yet he ignored every single one of them.

He might never get their trust back, but now they needed to focus on other things more important than that.

“Where is she?” He asked.

“Out,” Michael answered “The girls went with her. We don’t want her to be alone when she’s drunk”

They started walking towards the door, getting into the car that would take them to Y/N and the rest of the girls. “Do you know what you will say to her when you see her?” Calum asked.

“No,” Luke answered honestly “I guess I’ll know then”

“And you better not fuck it up again, Hemmings, or I swear it’s going to be the last thing you do”

The dance floor was crowded. People were dancing one against the other as the beats of the songs reverberated all over their bodies and started the flame of having just one night of fun. Among them it was Y/N, dancing in the corner with her friends and ignoring their concerned eyes as she moved freely thanks to the alcohol that was cursing through her veins. She knew she had to wake up soon, but she just wanted to keep living this dream every night instead of facing the nightmares that would come in the morning.

She missed how easy everything was before that night when the nightmare started. When she couldn’t find Luke in the crowd of their concert nor their bedroom late at night. Now she doesn’t even want to go to sleep, knowing that she won’t find him there ever again, all because she asked him to leave.

But he wanted to leave, even before she asked him he was already getting his stuff to leave her “cheating ass”, writing words that describe their relationship as toxic. Is that what it was? Were they toxic or just scared? She couldn’t tell the difference anymore, not after spending night after night trying to erase those words out of her mind, but they were already scared forever in her skin. She promised herself she would carry them as a battle wound, as proof that no matter what you do, you could never win when the whole world seems against you even when you have done nothing wrong… Unlike now.

She knew what she was doing, she knew she was disappointing a lot of people. She was disappointed in herself, too, but she couldn’t stop. The world was finally telling truths about her and it felt nice to at least have that. They denied her the truths for so long, feeding everyone lies that they would believe without hesitation or her explanation, just like Luke did, and now she was finally acting like people supposed she had. Now, at least she had control over that.

She wondered if Luke ever thinks about her. If he’s forgiven her for whatever he thinks she’s done or if he continues to read the articles and rejoice in the fact that he was right, even when he wasn’t, he was right. Maybe he’d be proud?

“Darling, are you alright?” She heard Bethany shout over the music. All the girls were looking at her. She didn’t realize she stopped dancing.

However, she just nodded “I’m going to get more drinks!” She said, faking a smile even though the girls could tell that she was crying. But she was so far out she couldn’t even feel the tears that rolled down her cheek.

Y/N gripped the marble countertop of the bar, trying to hold herself steady. She was thinking again, she didn’t want to think anymore. She ordered two shots of tequila and drowned them down before asking for two more. But before she could drown the fourth one, someone snatches the drink out of her hand.

“Heeey” She slurred “Don’t get between me and my- oh, hello!” She smiled happily at the stranger who took her drink from her “You look a lot like my ex-boyfriend”

Luke’s eyes widened at the word. She has never called him her boyfriend in front of people before. He glanced behind her and saw Michael, Ashton, and Calum already standing next to their girls, nodding encouragingly at him.

“Ex-boyfriend?” He asked, eyes meeting hers and noticing the glimmer of tears in them. But she kept on smiling and nodding before she started to pout.

“But shhhhh,” She said, laying her head on the counter, almost like she wanted to take a nap “It’s a secret. No one knows we’re together… or were together. They will never leave him alone if they find out”

“Who?”

Y/N looked to the sides, almost as if making sure no one was listening before she leaned into him and whispered “The media,” Then she started to giggle “If they found out I have a boyfriend then they will want to know everything about him! And poor Luke wouldn’t be able to handle that, he shouldn’t go through that”

Luke’s heart broke at the sight of the drunk girl sighing in the bar, holding her empty shot glass and sniffing every other word to stop the tears from falling.

“He doesn’t deserve that, the hate. He’s a good guy, a little shy and awkward, but he’s nice. But the media is cruel and a liar, and I don’t want him to feel baaaaad. How stupid it is that because I love someone they should get hated on, right? Hahaha, I just wanted to protect hiiiim, cause I love him sooo so much. I even protected him from my friends! You know?! I never told them what he did to me in case they wanted to keep their friendship going, Luke is a very shy guy and he loved them very muchhh, I couldn't take that from him"

“Even if he hurt you?” Luke’s words were careful and filled with pain. When the boys told him that she was getting drunk each night he never imagined her this far gone. He never imagined her this sad.

Y/N shook his head “I deserved to get, hic, hurt” She said between hiccups “He said I was a cheating whore monster liar, b-b-but I don’t blame himmmm. I’m sad but at least he doesn’t have to deal with me anymore and this BULLSHIT” She yelled, throwing her hands up to the sky. But then she started crying, sobbing as she tumbled backward before Luke caught her.

Luke was trying to contain his own tears as she sobbed into his embrace “I just want to tell him that I’m sorry I couldn’t protect him from myself” She cried “I wanted to be happy with him but we are both sad and toxic for each other. That’s what he said in his poem. I-I-I just w-want him to be ha-happy”

Luke cried as he held her, burying his face into her hair as both of their bodies trembled. Even when she had every right to hate him, she still wants to protect him. Something he should’ve done.

“I’m so sorry, my love” He cried, making Y/N look at him with worried, tearful eyes.

“Oh, don’t cry, stranger,” She said as she cupped his face and wiped his tears “I’m sad but you should be happy!”

“Why?”

“C-cause you’re not me”

Luke stared into her eyes, she was smiling while the tears kept falling. Even at her lowest, she tried to be strong for everyone around her, even the stranger she thought he was. He pressed his lips on a thin line and nodded, hugging her tighter as if he was trying to hold on to the last piece of her that didn’t show coldness to him before she remembers everything in the morning. At least he would hold her one more time.

Y/N didn’t understand much of what was happening but she returned the hug with the same energy, letting the stranger cry into her shoulder as she rubbed his back with her fingertips, wondering what Luke was doing right now. She decided that she didn’t want to know.

“I want to sleep,” She said after a minute of holding the man.

Luke pulled away from her, wiping his tears as he nodded “Then let’s get you to bed, my love”

She shook his head, pulling on his hand as he tried to walk them out of the club “But Luke won’t be there when I wake up”

All the wind was knocked out of his lungs, did she want him there? “I’ll be there,” He said.

“What?”

“He’ll be there. I promise”

Luke gave one last look at the group. They were all staring at him with worried and hopeful eyes, actually surprised that this didn’t end badly just yet. Luke nodded at them and pulled Y/N with him, the rest of the guys followed him into the car as they made their way back to the hotel.

Y/N slept all the way back, her head was placed in Luke’s shoulder as the blond kept staring at her, silent tears still dying on his cheek. The guilt was eating him alive; it was painful to see her this way, but at the same time he knew that she was at peace as she slept, letting the world fade for at least a few minutes before reality came crashing down.

When they reached the hotel, Luke carried her back into her room. He sat her down on the bed and started to take off her shoes as she lazily rubbed the tiredness from her eyes, suddenly waking up for a moment.

“Luke?” She asked. Luke raised his head and was met with her eyes already locked with his, a glaze of new tears adorned her pupils as she whispered “Am I dreaming right now?”

“No,” He answered, voice as soft as hers as he got up and placed a kiss on the top of her head “No, you’re not, darling”

“Good. I always hate to wake up without you there” She said, looking over her shoulder to the empty side where Luke used to sleep.

They both stayed quiet for the rest of the night. Luke took off her silk shirt and leather pants and helped her put on one of the big shirts she’s used to sleeping in. He wiped the makeup off her face and followed her nighttime routine without missing a step. When she was done, she curled up to her side and quickly fell into a deep slumber.

Luke stared at the girl, his heart aching for her as he saw how fragile she looked while she slept. He thought about all the things she said that night, how he never considered her side of the story before. How he just assumed that she was hiding him because she didn’t want people to find out she was taken when in reality she didn’t want people to hurt him the way they hurt her. The way he hurt her.

Tears started to pick up in his eyes again. He hated to cry but there was nothing else he could do at the moment. Everything became too much too fast and he didn’t know if he could fix it. So all he could do was cry for the girl he loves and the girl he lost, not knowing if she would ever come back to him.

“I’m sorry” He whispered in a quiet sob, getting into bed with her and holding her close “I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m sorry, my love” He kept murmuring into her hair until sleep claimed him as well.

The next morning Y/N wakes up in her hotel bed but she doesn’t know how she got there. She looks to her side but the bed is empty, yet she finds an aspirin and a bottle of water in her nightstand. She wonders who was the poor soul that had to go with her last night to make sure she doesn't end up drunk in a ditch, at least they succeeded.

Then she hears water running up in the bathroom and her heart sinks. Did she bring someone here last night? No, she wouldn’t do that. But she was very drunk… Oh my god, what did she do?

Luke could hear her shuffling in the bed as he brushed his teeth. “It is now or never,” He thought, but he didn’t know what he would find behind the door. She didn’t know him yesterday, but today was another story and Luke’s heart shrank at the thought of Y/N hating him for coming back, even if it was to apologize to her. He was terrified, but he was tired of running away.

As soon as he opened the door he was met with Y/N’s surprised gaze. The girl was quick to cover herself up, cheeks tinted red at the sight of her ex-boyfriend in her hotel room. She didn’t miss the flash of hurt that ran through his face when she did that.

“Luke…” She said in one breath, suddenly feeling self-conscious by his presence “What are you- Did we-?”

“No,” He answered quickly, stepping closer to the bed “No, we didn’t. You were drunk and I- You know I would never do that to you”

“I thought we didn’t know each other…”

Her words lingered in the air between them, creating a tension that could be cut with a knife. How fast did they become strangers when they used to know every single cardinal point of their bodies, every breath they took and what they meant, every sigh, every look… Now they were just two people in a room with so much to say but with no words coming out of either of their mouths.

Luke noticed how her eyes changed. While they were no longer filled with tears, they now laid emotionless in front of him, dull and empty as she stared at him.

“I did this to her,” He thought “I took the light of her eyes. It’s my fault”

She cleared her throat, breaking the silence as she spoke “Well, thank you for bringing me here last night. You can go now” She said, tearing her eyes away from him as she sat on her edge of the bed.

Luke stood still “No,”

“I’m asking you to leave” Y/N clarified, her voice growing stronger but still a bit sore.

“And I’m telling you I’m not going” He responded, taking tentative steps towards her “Something I should’ve done all those weeks ago”

He was standing in front of her in a matter of seconds; he crouched to meet her eyes but she quickly turned her face away “Y/N, please” He begged, his hand coming to rest on her cheek as his knuckles caressed her skin while the other one was placed on top of her hands, both intertwined with each other on top of her thighs “You could look at me yesterday, please don’t deny me at least that. Let me see you, my love”

But Y/N didn’t move, her face stayed turned to the side with her hair covering most of it. She couldn’t look at him, she just couldn’t. It was too hard, too painful. Luke sighed.

“Okay, it’s okay. You don’t have to, but at least listen to me, yeah? I just- I need you to listen, Y/N, please” He pleaded, placing both hands on top of hers “Y/N, I love you”

The knot in his throat became tighter as he noticed how the veins of her neck tensed and she started to grip her hands tighter. But she needed to hear this, and even though it hurt to see her like that, he continued.

“I love you. I love you. I love you” He said, voice breaking at the end, impossible to fight that choking feeling in his throat “I loved you since the moment I saw you. You were all dressed up in Calum‘s clothes and you had a pen in your hair, and I thought you were the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, but you were so nervous about trying to clean the coffee you spilled that you didn’t even notice I fell for you without knowing your name” He let out a tearful chuckle “I started to fall that day and I haven’t stopped, not even for a second. Y/N you are- You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I was an idiot for not seeing that. I don’t know what I have to do for you to forgive me, but I’ll do anything, my love. Anything to make it better. Cause I followed you blindly from the start, and I’m so sorry I let you down. I’m so, so fucking sorry that I let my insecurities come in our way. I love you, even then I never stopped loving you”

He could see how her chin started to tremble, she was trying to hold off the tears as much as him “I - I wish I could go back in time. I would’ve never said the things I said, I would’ve never doubted you or left without listening to what you had to say. I should’ve fought harder for you, but I was a coward. I still am, if I’m being honest, but I will not run away, Y/N. Not anymore. I know I will never deserve you, but I’ll do my best and try. Because you, my love, are the love of my life, the greatest love I have and - and I can’t -“

It became too much for him. He couldn’t say anything else without breaking down. But he wanted her to know how much she meant for him, how much he is willing to fight for her if she lets him. She needed to know how sorry he was and how much he still loves her. But the words got stuck in his throat. The poet was left speechless.

“Y/N you are so strong,” He finally said “So strong, my love. And I’m so fucking proud of everything you do, I always have and always will be” He brought her hands to his lips and started pressing kisses all over it while wetting them with his tears “I wish I could take back everything I said. All those words were said out of anger and jealousy, that is not how I see you at all. You are so beautiful, Y/N, inside and out. So kind, so smart, so giving… You are perfect. And I love you, I love you, I love yo-”

Suddenly his words were interrupted by her lips as she started kissing him. Y/N didn’t want to keep listening anymore so she did the only thing he could, the thing she wanted to do the most since she saw him come out of the bathroom.

Their hands flew to cup each other’s cheeks, keeping their faces as close as they could, feeling how their tears became one as they started to deepen the kiss. They rocked back and forward with the intensity of their energies colliding once again, it was everything they needed and more. Suddenly, Luke got up from the floor and brought Y/N along with her, pressing her against the wall as their lips never left each other.

“I love you” He breathed into her lips before kissing her again and again and again, already getting lost in the feeling of euphoria she brought to him “I love you”

She kept crying as their lips met, savoring every word, every praise that came from his mouth, trying hard to hold on to them as she felt her breath become short “I missed you” She cried into the kiss, pulling away to see his face.

Luke’s eyes were blown wide as he stared at her, their lips were pink as they tried to catch their breaths. He knocked his forehead against hers before kissing it lightly “Please, forgive me” He begged, holding her tight against his chest.

“Luke,” She whispered as she tugged on his shirt, making him look back at her “Kiss me”

He looked at her softly, his baby blue eyes saying more than he ever could as he caressed her cheek one more time before leaning down and trapping her lips with his. He had no rush because there was no other place he’d rather be, no other person he’d rather spend time with. Only her. Only his Y/N.

Her hands traveled tentatively under his shirt, softly caressing the skin of his back and his stomach as she parted her lips to grant him more access and control. Luke’s hand that was not cupping her cheek rounded around her waist, bringing her body closer to him with the need of feeling her, all of her.

“Y/N…” He groaned, tilting his head back when he felt her kiss along his jaw and neck.

“Please…” She murmured against his skin, sucking and kissing on the spot that she knew would make him shiver.

Luke pressed her against the wall with his body completely covering hers. He grabbed the back of her thighs and lifted her feet from the ground as she locked her legs around his waist. “Please,” She begged again, closing her lips around the shell of his ear and slightly biting into it. She could feel him getting hard as her hips moved forward, her core pressing against his hardening cock. She moaned softly into his ear “Please, Luke. Please”

The movement of her hips was all Luke needed to lose himself to her, thrusting right back at her and moaning at the friction of her soaked panties against his clothed erection. Her sound became more breathy and he knew she was getting close just by the friction alone, having spent too much time without this feeling.

“Y/N…” Luke groaned into her after a particularly hard trust “I-”

“I know” She breathed “I need it too,”

Without a second thought, Luke turned both of them around, still holding Y/N by the back of her thighs as he placed them back into the bed. Now it was his turn to kiss along her face, her lips, her neck… everywhere she would give him access to and would leave her breathing his name. His hands fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, taking it off completely in one swift move and occupying his hands by touching her breasts, massaging them softly as his lips closed against one of her nipples, tongue circling around the hard pebble until they were nice, erect and wet from his kiss only to do it again with the other one.

Y/N was a whimpering mess under him, her fingers tangling in his hair as he sucked on her sweet spot, kissing down her body until his lips found her wet panties. He kissed over her clothes bundle of nerves, making her moan and begged for more as he swiftly hooked his long fingers at either side of her hips and pulled them down, kissing along her thighs up and down and up again only to finish tongue deep into her hole, lapping at her arousal and moaning against her at the taste of her. He always found her exquisite.

Stars were playing behind her eyelids as she felt one finger inside her while Luke’s lips closed against her clit, sucking it lightly as he inserted another finger per her request, thrusting then inside and out as she chanted his name like a prayer when her walls clenched against them.

Luke licked her clean as her fingers played with his hair, relishing this intimate moment as a precious memory for the future. When he pushed himself up he noticed that there were a new set of tears rolling down her cheeks “Are you okay, love?” He asked, “Did I hurt you?”

She shook his head, looking up at him with teary eyes “I love you”

His eyes soften at her words, hands caressing the side of her face as he leaned in without thinking, kissing her tears away with such care, never wanting to see them again.

“Luke…” She whispered, kissing his chin “Luke, make love to me”

Blue eyes met Y/E/C, sharing all the love he had in them before leaning down again to trap her lips with his; tongues dancing together like it was the first time all over again where no other words were needed.

Y/N helped him out of his shirt and shorts, pumping his cock in her hands as he moaned in her ear how good it felt before lining it up with her entrance, quiet gasps leaving each other’s mouths as they felt the familiar stretch when he bottomed out.

Soft words and kisses were shared as Luke’s thrusts were slow and steady. It was silent, needy, passionate; it was everything they needed and more. Their hands explored the familiarity of their bodies, leaving faint marks as they enjoyed their shared pleasure.

“Please,” She begged against his lips, moaning as Luke started hitting her spot “Please, please, please, plea-”

Her orgasm came over her like a wave and Luke was entranced with her face as it contorted in extasis, helping him reach his climax as he cum inside her, painting her walls as his thrusts became sloppy.

They stayed like that for a while, kissing on top of each other as their bodies stayed connected in the most intimate way. But soon Luke had to get up, getting a wet cloth from the bathroom and cleaning her up, whispering sweet nothings to her as he did so.

He climbed into the bed next to her, pulling her closer against his chest as his back rested against the headboard, drawing circles in the soft spot of her back and resting his chin on the top of her head.

They must’ve fallen asleep after a while because when he opened his eyes again he felt Y/N crying into his chest.

“My love?” He asked, worry lacing his voice as he accommodated himself better so he could see her face. Y/N eyes were puffy and filled with tears as she struggled to contain a sob “What’s wrong?”

Y/N sniffed, voice breaking as she asked “You love me?”

Luke furrowed his eyebrows in confusion “What a stupid question,” He said as he started playing with your hair “Of course I love you”

“But what else?”

Her question confused him, even more, when he saw pure heartbreak spread along her face.

“What else what?”

“You love me and what else?” She repeated her question.

“What else is there?”

Luke’s answer made her lips tremble as a new set of tears filled her eyes. His heart fell to his stomach with her reaction, not knowing what he did to make her this upset “Baby, what’s wrong? Is love not enough?”

Y/N shook her head as she took a deep breath, trying to find enough voice and courage to say what she needed.

“I’m not perfect, Luke”

“I know,” He said, bringing his fingers to caress your cheek but you shook your head.

“No, you don’t know” She stated, tears rolling down her cheek “You still see me as something out of your reach, as something you don’t deserve because you hold me to such standards that is impossible for me to live up to your expectations. I will let you down, even without wanting to, I will. And- a-and I don’t think I’ll be able to stand that look in your eyes once I do. I can’t go through that again”

She cried softly for a while, trying to find the right words to say.

“Luke, I need you to listen to me very carefully and really think about what I’m asking for here, okay, love?” She said after collecting herself just enough. He nodded as he gave her his undivided attention “Luke, I love you. More than anyone in the world, I love you. I thought I would never say those words again but I can’t deny my feelings for you nor do I want to. I love you. But I also love my life”

Luke’s eyes were fixed on her as she spoke, nodding along to what she was saying. She took another deep breath before continuing.

“A life that is filled with concerts, traveling and recordings and parties and interviews… A life that I chose to follow my dreams and make them come true. A life I am not going to give up because it’s mine and I truly love it. But in this life, there are some bumps in the road. There will always be people trying to bring me down, sending hate to me and the ones I love, spreading rumors all around where sometimes you won’t be able to distinguish fiction from reality. With people trying to get to me, by flirting or abusing their power with threats. But I keep going, I deal with all of that because that’s just the way it is. I will go to an interview that might get twisted, I might go and get flirted on by a random stranger that works for publicity. I might have rumors of me dating people I haven’t even met! All of that without my consent or knowledge. But I agreed to this when I agreed to follow my dreams and I can’t help it when it happens and most of the time I can’t say anything about it even if it hurts.

And when that happens I need to know that you will trust me. Because I cannot possibly ask you to leave your dreams to follow mine, meaning that we won’t be together all the time like we’re used to. And I need to know that you will trust me when I’m away from you”

Luke stayed quiet, his mind running a thousand miles per hour at her words. Could he trust her? When they were together on tour, and even at home in L.A, the rumors about Y/N were strong, so much so that he didn’t know if they were true or not. And even though he knew her, he still wasn’t sure. He doubted her, more times than not he did which ended up in him losing her until last night. He trusted her now, but…

“I don’t know,” He answered honestly, feeling like the weight of his shoulders was being lifted as he spoke “I don’t trust my mind, not when it’s about you. Not really. I trust you here, right now but I can’t promise that my insecurities won’t get in the way, changing that for the future. But I can try, I’ll do my best-”

“What if your best is not enough, Luke?” She asked, sucking the air out of both of them.

“What?” He asked in return, voice small and soft.

She sighed, blinking through the tears “What if- What if it’s not enough? You love me, but you don’t trust me. I love you, but I’m scared you’re going to run away every time you hear something about me that could tint the image of me you have in your mind. I’m scared of that Y/N because I’m not her and I might never be able to compete with her. I wish I could tell you that everything will change for the better, that love will be enough. But if we can’t see a future now…”

“There might not be a future at all” Luke finished for her.

The truth hurt more than they could ever have imagined, but it was still the truth. Without trust, there is no love that could endure the passings of times, but they could try, couldn’t they?

“What now?” He asked after a moment of silence.

“Hold me?”

Luke opened his arms and Y/N nested into them, setting her head upon his chest and letting his heartbeat be the melody of her heartbreak. “I love you” She whispered into his skin.

“I love you, too”

“I might never stop loving you”

“You don’t have to”

She sighed “I know, that’s what scares me”

Luke nodded, even though she couldn't see him. He let his fingertips trace up and down her arms and back, serving as the only comfort he could give right now.

“Stay with me tonight?” She asked, tilting her head so she could look him in the eyes “Just one night the two of us where we can leave the world behind. Just us and for tonight that’s enough”

He smiled sadly “Morning will come eventually”

“And what will happen to us in the morning?”

Luke let out a sad sigh “I don’t know”

Tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @hoodhoran @flaneurcth @notinthesameguey @bubblegum18 @irwin-fletcher-ash @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @1980holland @wiiildflowerrr @myloverboyash @nicebasscalum @calumspupils @secretsicanthideanymore @the-ghost-of-ash @alltimesos @kingxnichole @givebuckyhisplumsnow @hufflehemm @wildflower98 @girl-toxxic

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creativeashproductions · 4 years ago

Text

Hiking Buddy // Charlie Gillespie

Summary: Once upon a time you could joke that quaratine bordom was the cause of the mass amount of 2020 pregnancies. Well you could until you found yourself in the same boat...or shall we say crib?? Go on the journey as Y/N reveals the pregnancy to Charlie and later their friends.

Warnings: Swearing, talk of vomiting, pregnancy, and fluff.

Words: 2.5k

Requested: Yes. Anon

A/N: Someone asked for dad!Charlie and I couldn’t resist.

Please ask to be tagged in my inbox because I can’t promise you will be through commenting on the posts!

I take requests as well!

Masterlist

Pulled from deep in your chest was a groan at the dizziness rushing from the bedroom into the bathroom. The tile floor cool to the touch as your body was flush on the bathroom floor recovering from the bout of sickness. The fortunate thing about the pandemic was that you had no obligations taking you out of the home. Sitting up, you sat back against the white porcelain tub grimacing at the bitter aftertaste of your date with the toilet.

Slowly you found your grounding enough to shakily stand on two feet to brush your teeth to get rid of the nasty aftertaste. Your eyes found the pale expression of your reflection fading as nausea faded as well.

“This is tainting naps for me.” You muttered under your breath, washing your hands before proceeding to splash your face.

Your social media had been flooded with many people in your personal life and celebrities announcing pregnancies. You and Charlie often made teasing remarks about if people were so bored. Guess you couldn’t joke about it anymore.

Your hand splayed across the bare skin under the band shirt hanging loose on your form with a small smile. It had been a hectic year getting married to Charlie while filming the first season of Julie and the Phantoms. The plan had been to wait a few years to enjoy your careers and marriage before children. Get more established in the film industry as a woman was necessary, but you couldn’t get mad. This child would be a gift.

“I’d appreciate if I don’t have gross cravings okay? I have to put up with your dad’s questionable food combinations. I may throw up looking at it.” You muttered smiling at the smooth skin you couldn’t wait to grow into a bump.

At the beginning of the pandemic, you, along with Charlie, had flown back to Canada. Living outside of city limits, Charlie was able to still hike and meet up with family in a safe condition. You grew more as a couple as well.

Turning the light off in the bathroom, you made your way to slip your faux fur lined grey and burgundy moccasins—the mid-afternoon sun shining through the windows of the bedroom giving a picturesque view of the forest. Charlie was more than likely in the home gym you had thrown together once arriving at the home.

“I have an idea a little one.” You spoke to the little life you carried inside your womb. After the positive pregnancy and your confirmation with the OB/GYN, you had ordered a few items.

First, it was baby-sized pair of hiking boots to go with a forest green, that matched Charlie’s eyes, onesie with black lettering. The lettering saying ‘And so the Adventure Begins’. The background had with trees and mountains. As nature enthusiasts, you thought it would be perfect.

The box had arrived early this morning when Charlie had been in the shower giving you time to hide it. Now you just had to mention you wanted to go hiking with him.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Charlie spoke, kissing your forehead as he walked into the home. His first instinct to grab a snack after his workout, “How was your nap?”

“Energized me. Hey, are you too tired to go on a short hike?” You questioned filling a glass with water to hand to him. His smile was thanks enough as he tugged you to sit in his lap.

“We haven’t gone on one in quite a while. What brought it on?” Charlie asked, wrapping his arms around to finish his protein bar. His chin coming to rest of your shoulder familiarly; you relaxed into his chest.

“It’s a nice day. We’ve been cooped up in the house for a while. Just wanna get out.” You replied heart doing a flutter when his arms wrapped around your midsection.

“Let me get a few things,” Charlie spoke gently, pushing you up to the job to the spare bedroom. The closet kept the supplies you used for hikes, like the first aid kit that he started bringing after you cut your knee once.

As he collected the items, you quickly changed into clothing acceptable for the hike and shoving the things into the backpack. Slipping it on, you met your husband at the front door lacing up your boots. Charlie lifted the house keys in his hands before he tugged you outside, excited for the escape. His hand never leaving yours, you found the well-used trail you had explored countless times.

“Are you feeling better?” Charlie asked, swinging your hands together, refusing to release his grip. His eyes glancing over to catch your expression.

“I think I was overtired.” You replied, keeping your eyes on the trail looking for the rock you wanted to use.

Charlie’s phone was pulled out to make a short video.

“Get yourself a partner that suggests a hike before you.” Charlie slowed to press a kiss to your flushed cheek, “No but seriously. I’m incredibly lucky to have someone like my wife here.”

“Oh, shush.” You snickered as he intentionally pulled you to a stop to press kisses all over your face. His grin and his love would melt the hearts of his followers. Charlie returned the phone to his pocket as he hummed the melody to Unsaid Emily.

“Be right back.” Charlie spoke, squeezing your hand as he jogged to the forest, “I drank too much coffee this morning!”

You couldn’t help the laugh at his blunt words and his typical caffeine intake, but it gave you the perfect opportunity. Using the limited time, you were quick to place the onesie on the rock with the baby hiking boots near the shoulder. You had forgone on asking for a sonogram picture so you could share that moment with Charlie.

“I always forget to pee before we leave the house. Good thing we live near nature.” Charlie spoke jogging closer to where you were hiding the items behind you.

“Do you think green or mine?” You asked, bringing an expression of confusion on your husband’s face. He stepped closer halting when you stepped to the side, “I think yours. I love your eyes.”

Charlie was frozen entirely at the surprise you had planted in his short absence. He didn’t even notice he had moved until the soft cotton of the onesie brushed his fingertips. With his attention solely on the boots, he hadn’t seen you had a stepped up a camera to catch his reaction.

“Are those…?”

“They won’t need the boots in our arms, but I thought we could match.” You continued shifting with the camera to catch his wonder-filled gaze. His expression melted your heart as he gently caressed the side of the boot from his crouched position.

“We’re-“

“-getting a new hiking buddy.” You finished beaming as Charlie lunged you swing you in his arms, “Okay Char. I’d prefer not throwing up again.”

Charlie stumbled back glancing around the area, “I love how you surprised me, but what if you had fallen? I can’t have my loves hurt.”

“Charlie. We’re on an easy trail, not Everest. I’m fine.” You deadpanned watching his cheeks flush at your response, “But I would like to get home. I’m so hungry.”

September 2020

Emma Roberts, Sasha Pieterse, Bindi Irwin, High School Music alumni Ashley Tisdale, and Hilary Duff were only a handful of celebrities welcoming babies. If hiding your marriage with Charlie was hard during filming, hiding the pregnancy was harder with your friends. Especially hitting seven months with a big bump concealed with camera angles.

You wanted to keep the news under wraps, so the media focused on the show, not your pregnancy at an early age. Of course, your friends were suspicious of Charlie’s posts and stories, not showing their favourite Gillespie. Carolynn knew just by the fullness of your face barely noticeable to the others.

“Oof.” You breathed wincing at the sharp kick to your ribs from Sprout. Charlie’s concerned gaze glancing over from his interview.

Swiftly rubbing the area, the kick happened your fingers returned to flip the page of the pregnancy book. You had grown used to the concern Charlie carried, he always had his phone fully charged on his hikes. Hikes you hadn’t taken since you surprised him with the little boots; it had been a disagreement, but you got where he was coming from.

“I’m fine, Charles.” You spoke, forcing him to turn his attention back to the closing interview. Once he turned the camera off, he rushed over to crouch in front of the couch, placing his hands on your stretched belly.

“Thought we had a deal Sprout.” He cooed caressing the band shirt covering your stretched skin, “Don’t hurt your mama.”

Your face twisted as the baby shifted, while you were enthralled by the fact you were carrying a child it felt like an alien. It was weird feeling something move inside and kick your damn inside like a fucking soccer ball.

“I can’t wait for the baby to be out.” You groaned, hiding the smile as Charlie’s lips pressed against your belly. You couldn’t wait to see him interact with his child.

“I say we name him Luke.” Charlie teased shifting you ahead so he could slide behind you in the usual position. His fingers immediately massaging your stiff shoulders and neck.

“I like Alex better. He’s the best Phantom.” You retorted reaching up to hold his hands, “Sensitive and his sarcasm? Immaculate.”

“We can table the options at a later time.” Charlie quickly replied chuckling as you moved position once more to rest against his chest. His fingers finding their way into your silky hair, pregnancy hormones had sped up hair growth.

“Hey-“ Your words fractured as your phone buzzed with a FaceTime request from Jeremy. Charlie quickly answered with a snicker as your response was cut off.

Jeremy’s eyes narrowed at the sight of you two on your couch, “My wife and I had drinks with our family. Carolynn slipped and told me something interesting.”

You and your husband froze as Carolynn sheepishly joined her husband in their white bedroom with a quick apology. Guess the cat was out of the bag.

“You guys are having a kid?” Jeremy asked, taking in the two actors he had quickly become good friends with during filming. His mind recalling a moment at his wedding when you guys had disappeared for a good twenty minutes.

March 2020

The Shada wedding had been gorgeous and like a dream to see someone you saw as a brother find his other half. Your hand was kept tight in your husband’s sitting among Owen, Tori and Kenny himself. Owen had snuck himself and Tori wine while Kenny turned his eye to the underage drinking.

“Wanna take a walk?” Charlie murmured in your ear as Jeremy and Carolynn made their way around their guests. His hot breath sending a chill down your spine as his left hand came to rest on your thigh.

The romantic atmosphere with the wine you had had during dinner lowered your inhibitions that you and Charlie snuck to the less used bathroom. You two quickly gave evidence that wedding hookups were very real. You managed to sneak back into the reception where dancing was taking place; a perfect story to why you and Charlie were a little dishevelled.

“Hey!” Owen called seeing you two join him on the floor. The wine had blinded his view of the very obvious couple, Owen knew from catching you two what a quickie appearance looked like.

“I think you’ve had enough to drink Bud.” Charlie spoke to the teenager as Jeremy made his way over to his friends, “Congrats Jer!”

“Thanks, man! When will we get the Gillespie wedding we didn’t get?” Jeremy called over the music beaming when his new wife plastered herself to Jeremy.

“Maybe in the next year.” You retorted twirling in Charlie’s arms thanks to the dance lessons of boot camp.

“Oh my god. Little Gillespie was conceived at our wedding.” Jeremy spoke, leaning back to his wife, “You’d be due in November, right?”

Your cheeks burned as Jeremy and Carolynn put the pieces together swiftly, “Well can we keep this a secret until October? I don’t want to take attention away from the show.”

“You should tell the others.” Jeremy suggested squeezing his wife’s hand, “They might think Charlie kidnapped a baby otherwise.”

Agreeing to announce to your friends Charlie had set up a video hangout with Owen, Mads, Savannah, Jeremy and even Kenny. It was in the later evening with the hiking boots out of shot and your shirt and belly below the camera view.

“Hey, guys!” Charlie greeted his friends as everyone entered the video, “Insane how many fan edits there are!”

“So cool!” Mads beamed addressing Kenny, “Thanks for giving me the chance to be involved in the coolest project.”

“You did all the work.” Kenny waved it off, taking in the cast of one of his favourite projects to date. You all meshed together so perfectly even if your character was only recurring like Sav.

“Hey, Kenny can we get your opinion on something?” You asked, gaining everyone’s attention and excitement after only using texting with the group. Morning sickness and fatigue had depleted your desire to be physically seen.

Kenny nodded, leading you to grab the baby hiking boots, “Do you think these are adequate enough to run from the witches?”

It was utterly silent as Charlie raised the little plaque he had ordered. The plaque included the Hocus Pocus witches in front of a cream moon, faces featureless other than eyebrows and lips. The corner had a cobweb with a little spider and just under it said ‘Winnie, I smell…a child’ with the pregnancy test snug in the cut out. Your favourite was the ‘it’s just a bunch of hocus pocus’ under the test.

“No way!” Owen screamed as all hell broke loose with the others. Charlie beamed at the sheer excitement on their faces.

“You’re having a baby?” Kenny murmured with a smile at the touching announcement and acting being involved.

“Charlie suggested the Hocus Pocus theme because we may have kept it to ourselves and our family?” Your voice went up a few octaves as the truth broke free.

“You haven’t had the kid, right?” Mads questioned peering in the background behind you finding nothing.

“Hopefully we have our hiking buddy in November on the due date. I don’t want to overdue, this kid weighs a ton.” You moaned snuggling into Charlie’s side, “We defin-“

“Jer’s wedding.” Owen interrupted with narrowed eyes, “You disappeared and came back with-“

“-O there is a child present.” Sav joked getting Mads to scoff at her, but everyone made a face as they recalled your disappearing act.

“Oh, your house must be filled with gross food combos. I hope the baby gets Y/N’s looks and taste buds.” Mads called hanging up before Charlie could retort at her. His eyes rolled, but the smile told another story, but slowly each of their friends said their goodbyes.

“At least Owen won’t go spilling the news to anyone.” You snorted playing your hand on Charlie’s large one splayed across your tummy.

You had a lot to thank Kenny for too. Without being cast by him, you wouldn’t have met your friends which in turn would mean you wouldn’t have been at Jer’s wedding. That would have been tragic since his marriage is the sole reason you had a child due in two months.

Tag List (PLEASE SEND AN INBOX TO BE ADDED! I CANNOT GUARANTEE YOU WILL BE ON THE LIST VIA POST COMMENTS!)

@safehavenmuse @siennanoelle01 @whiterose291 @mell-bell @blackhood5sos @ficrecsideblog @ifilwtmfc @deadpoolgirl23 @crappy-unicorn @sunsetcurve-h @elioelioeli0 @lovesanimals @popcrone818 @lolychu @deepsleepnat @tenaciousperfectionunknown @aunicornmademedoit @just-a-writer-here @simp4reggie @parkeret @faithiebrock01 @overlyhypedup @differentsoulrascalsalad @aesthetic-lyss @versaceapa @carleywhittaker @lostgirl219 @itsalexx21 @elllaoo4 @merxxleighann @mediocremunge @fantomlovesjuke4ever @dpaccione @oswin05 @kaylinfayezink @aberette13 @faithie-brock-gillespie01 @eharvey0218 @overlyhypedup @benstormy @auriandthepussicats @sarcasticsagittarius1998 @whothefuckstolemykeds @siriuswvrld @princessvader15 @xoxbloodreinaxox @heimdoodle @joshy-obx @lovesanimals @oopsiedoopsie23 @am3l1a-24 @flying-solo-without-you @jaskiers-sweetkiss @lostrandomfangirln @must-be-a-weasley-92 @jatp-holland @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch @dxlanhxlland @dasexydevitt13 @ifilwtmfc @arianagrandes-things @kinda-really-lost @marinettepotterandplagg @ssprayberrythings @morgandamrose @thedarkqueenofavalon @zukoshonourr @crybabyddl @spooky-season-bitch @kcd15 @morganayennefertyrell @magnet-girl @all-in-fangirl

#charlie gillespie imagines #charlie gillespie x reader #julie and the phantoms imagines #luke patterson imagines #charlie gillespie fanfiction #caitsy and ash productions

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seasonofthegeek · 4 years ago

Text

The Question

I’m feeling things so let’s have twenty-somethings Ladybug and Chat Noir who haven’t seen each other in a few months because Ladybug decided to take a break from the hero thing to decide if it’s something she can keep doing after five or so years of giving it her all.

_____

"You're back. It's been a while."

Ladybug tried not to let her surprise at the neutral welcome color her expression. Transforming and swinging across the dark sky had been a spontaneous decision but when she'd caught sight of her former partner, it'd felt like it was meant to be.

Maybe she’d been wrong.

"It has," she agreed, voice slightly wavering. She cleared her throat and waffled her gloved hand in the air with a frown. "And, uh, I'm not actually sure if I'm back yet. Tonight was kind of a test run."

Chat Noir nodded without looking at her and walked closer to the roof edge, gazing down at the lights of the city.

"Sorry I haven't called or anything," she continued. The air between them felt too heavy to let silence settle. "I've been taking some time to try to decide, uh, some things, I guess."

"I remember." He finally did look at her and his guarded gaze made her ache in a way she couldn't quite place. His tail lashed behind him but otherwise he stood still, half turned to her.

"That's why you disappeared in the first place."

"I didn't disappear," she huffed, crossing her arms. "I haven't actually gone anywhere, Chat, and I told you I wasn't going to transform for a while so you would know not to expect me."

"You did," he conceded.

"And if I saw that you guys really needed me in a fight, I would've come," she argued, hearing the petulance leak into her tone. "But you've had it covered."

Chat Noir pursed his lips and looked away from her again. "Yep. Now it only takes a team of eight to do what you and I used to do."

"That's not fair."

"No, it's not." His jaw set in a hard line for a long moment and then his entire being visibly drooped. "I've missed you, Bugaboo," he said quietly. "Being out here isn't the same on my own."

"You're not on your own."

He shrugged. "Feels like I am."

He moved to the ledge and plopped down, long legs slinging out over the edge in what would have seemed like a death-defying move from anyone else. "Hawk Moth and Mayura are getting stronger."

"Sure seems like it." She settled down beside him, leaving an uncharacteristic amount of space between them. "I thought we were free of them."

"Guess they were just taking a break too." Chat Noir attempted a smile but it fell short. "Doesn't help that they aren't the only Big Bads anymore."

Ladybug swallowed hard and nodded. "It just feels so...don't you just..." She let out a frustrated grunt. "I'm tired; aren't you tired? We've been doing this for years and it's that same thing over and over and..." She trailed off again and shook her head, unable to find the right words.

"It shouldn't have been us," he said after a few minutes. "We were kids. There should've been someone else to do this. Adults, people who knew what they were signing up for," he muttered. "Someone else."

"Feels like a lifetime ago when we started this."

"It wasn't. Not really."

“I guess not. And now we're the adults."

"Terrifying, huh?" A siren sounded in the distance and Chat Noir shook his head. "I'm not on duty tonight. They'll call me if they need me."

Silence settled between them and while it was heavy it wasn't as awful as Ladybug feared. There had always been things left unsaid and there always would be; the things had just changed over the years.

It was really nice to be by his side again though.

"Being in charge suits you." She crossed her legs and tapped her heels against brick before kicking out. It felt good to be up so high, to feel the thrill of power.

"Yeah, right." His words held a bitter laugh. "I never know the right thing to do."

"That's not true." She scooted to the side, closing a bit of distance between them. "I've watched your interviews, you know. And I've seen the footage of you directing the team. You're doing great, Kitty."

He loosely clasped his hands over his knees and leaned dangerously forward. He looked back towards her, hair that had gotten just a little too long hiding his eyes. "You really don't know if you're coming back?"

She knew the question was coming.

She knew and she still didn't have an answer.

"Is it so bad to want a life away from this?" she asked instead. "I don't think I'm gonna get a degree at this point, but it'd be nice to know I had the option without a villain of the week wreaking havoc. I’m surprised we even graduated."

"I’m taking some classes and it sucks." He leaned back again and she saw the shadow of a smile flicker across his face. "My only saving grace has been that classes are online and my professors don’t seem to mind me turning in stuff late."

"That’s awesome. I’m proud of you."

He shrugged. “Not completely my choice, to be honest, but I made a deal with my dad. And who knows, maybe it’ll give me some idea of what I want to do with the rest of my life.”

She let that sink in before responding. “Do you think you want to keep being Chat indefinitely?”

“I like being me. I think it’d be hard to leave it behind. Definitely hard to lose Plagg.” He rubbed at his ring.

"Yeah, that’s been a bit of an issue for me too with Tikki. She’s family.”

He blew out a loud breath. “I get why you took a break. I can admit I’ve been mad about it, but...” His shoulders slumped. “I get it. I think I needed tonight to remind me how you felt.”

She reached across the small space still between them and took one of his clawed hands in hers. “You know I wasn’t leaving you, don’t you? That’s not what I meant this to be.”

“It kinda felt like it though.” He stared down at their hands. “We’ve been Chat Noir and Ladybug for half a decade. I didn’t want that to end.”

“Ladybug and Chat Noir,” she corrected with a teasing smile. “And it hasn’t ended; it’s just been...put on temporary hold.”

He tightened his hold on her hand. “I should tell you that I want you to do what makes you happy, but the selfish part of me really wants to talk you into coming back no matter what. I don’t wanna lose you. You’re just as much a part of me as being Chat Noir is.”

She let his tail wrapping around her waist guide her closer to his side so she could rest her head on his shoulder.

She’d missed him. Her heart had ached from a Chat Noir-sized hole she hadn’t even realized was there and as she sat on the roof ledge, looking over the twinkling lights of the city and feeling his warmth seep into her side, she felt like she could come back to this life.

But...

“I need more time,” she whispered. She felt him stiffen slightly at her side. She felt the crack of her admission skitter along the surface of her heart, and then an internal sigh of relief at the truth of it.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

#ladynoir #ladybug #chat noir #miraculous #kinda wanna turn this into something #kinda think it might be angsty #sides of the love square falling for each other #hmmmmmmmm

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 4 years ago

Text

Warm

Prompts: Um hi, I love your writing. Would you by any chance want to write a hurt/comfort piece where Janus returns from a meeting with the Light Sides and has a breakdown bc the Light Sides still don’t completely accept him after everything (not in an unsymp way, more in a suspicious-but-not-wanting-or-realizing-that-they-hurt-him-way) and Remus comforts him? Thank you lots (should you choose to write it :D) - anon

If your still up for prompts can you do remus helping to comfort janus after a busy day like he does stuff only dark sides would know that will help janus relax - whitehorsewolf

Thank you for the asks, babes!

Read on Ao3

Warnings: sympathetic dark bois

Pairings: can be dukeceit if you want, doesn’t have to be

Word Count: 1998

They’re not mean. They’re just cold.

Patton doesn’t insist that he’s evil and that they should never listen to him, that bar none, lying is wrong, and Thomas is a bad person for even thinking about it. Logan doesn’t throw barb after barb at him, pretending he doesn’t understand sarcasm and using it as an excuse to put down his intelligence. Virgil doesn’t make his life hell every time he dares open his mouth. Roman doesn’t loudly cut him off or glare at him or make fun of everything he says.

Patton is quiet, asking politely if Janus wouldn’t mind explaining a little more. Logan is clipped, smooth, dispassionate. Virgil never makes eye contact with him but backs him up, every single time. Roman apologizes when he misunderstands and offers solutions for Janus to consider.

They are considerate, they are careful, and Janus hates it.

They’re walking on eggshells now, not just with him, but with each other. They speak so carefully that every single word becomes a lie, a lie of omission. Janus’s mouth almost starts to bleed with how bitter it tastes.

They try. They do their best. And he does have to give them credit because they are trying. They’re trying so hard that it’s killing them. It’s killing him.

So much is going unsaid so they don’t accidentally hurt anyone else that they’re tearing themselves asunder.

Is this…what he wanted?

He certainly didn’t want it to be this cold.

Janus reaches his door with a groan, opening it and slipping inside. His fingers slide uselessly off the clasps at the front, unable to wrap around anything for long enough to undo the clasp, move the material, even work through the fabric of his gloves. The material saps the warmth from him the longer he can’t get it off, creating a strange warmth paradox where it’s the only thing that kept him standing in that frigid, frigid living room but now it’s wicking away every last speck of his own heat.

He hisses, his mouth still bone dry from the lies. He manages to get himself over to the heat lamp and bat clumsily at the base, searching desperately for the button to press and make all this cold, cold, cold go away. He misses.

He grits his teeth and tries again.

He summons up every last bit of willpower he has and tries again.

Finally, he hits the button and almost faints with relief. The warmth is there, it’s right there, he just has to…just has to get to it…it’s so close…it’s right there…

Snakes…snakes don’t do well in the…in the cold…it’s cold…it’s so cold…

It’s…so…cold…

…so…

…cold.

Janus falls to the floor, his hand outstretched for the warmth of the heat lamp.

Something bangs on his door.

Bang. Bang. Bang.

“Janny!”

Janus can’t summon up anything to move.

“Janny, open up, or I’m coming in.”

He…can’t…move…too…cold…

“Janny? Janny, you’re not supposed to be the one that’s scary down here.”

…cold…

The hinges almost fly off his door as Remus kicks it in. If he weren’t as he currently is, he’d be pissed. As of right now, he’s just…there…lying on the ground…out of the warmth.

“Jeez, Janny, you’d think that you…were…Jan?”

Remus’s voice turns from manic glee to concern in less than an instant. Before Janus can blink—snakes don’t have eyelids—Remus is there, next to him, crouched on the floor.

“What’re you doing over here, Jan,” Remus mutters, “and why are you colder than a polar bear’s butthole?”

“Re…mus…”

“Yeah, Jan, it’s me, let’s…alright, let’s get you into the heat, yeah?” Remus grunts and gets his arms under Janus.

Janus almost groans with how warm Remus feels, even through the thick cloak. Once the heat’s gone it’s gone, replaced quickly by the blazing light of the lamp. Unconsciously, Janus lets his head flop to the side, the scales starting to gleam in the amber glow.

“Alright, that’s better, now let’s just—alright, here we go—why am I the one uncomfortable right now, is this what it’s like for all of you? It’s awful…”

If Janus had speech right now, he’d be asking Remus what he was talking about. Instead, all he can do is hiss clumsily as Remus starts to peel the layers off of him. Why is Remus doing this? Is something wrong with him?

Oh, right, he’s cold.

A high-pitched whine splits the air. He doesn’t like it. He would rather it stopped, thank you very much. It hurts. Did they leave some electronics on or something? Can this stop now?

Now Remus is making a shushing noise, what—

—oh. Is it…

“Shh, shh, Jan-Jan, it’s okay, hey, uh-uh, Snakey, you look at me now, yeah?”

Warm. Warm hand on his face. He tries to blink—does he have eyelids now?—and Remus’s face swims into view.

He’s worried. Remus never looks worried. It softens as soon as Janus can focus on him.

“Hey, Snakey,” Remus murmurs, “you just stay here, yeah? Be a little snake puddle?”

The whine keeps going. If anything it gets higher.

“Shh, shh, shh,” Remus hushes, “if you do too much of that you’ll spread the cold back around you, you gotta be quiet for a little, yeah? I’m gonna get the rest of these off you, but you don’t have to worry.”

…he’s the one making that noise. Well, that’s embarrassing. He’s sure if he could he’d be blushing right now. But cold-blooded and all that…

“There you go, Snakey,” comes Remus’s soft voice as those warm hands go back to work, “just stay right here and bask in your heat lamp. I’m gonna help.”

Janus lets his eyes close as more things start to jostle him lightly. He feels the thick layers being pulled away, exposing more and more scales to the bright light. It’s warm. It’s warm. He sags to the ground and his hands begin to twitch.

A chuckle comes from somewhere above him.

“Jan-Jan,” Remus murmurs, much closer, “I’m gonna get your soft stuff to put on and your scale brush, yeah?”

Janus just hums.

“When you got speech back you’re gonna tell me what happened,” comes the soft mutter before Remus is gone, leaving Janus there in the warmth.

Is he…mad? No, not really. The others haven’t done anything wrong, per se, they’re trying their best and it’s…it’s not easy. None of this is easy. As a matter of fact, they’re doing quite well, all things considered. He’s not exactly blameless here, is he?

Is he sad? That they don’t like him? Yes, a little, but that’s…that’s also not really what’s going on.

He’s just tired.

And very, very cold.

“Hey,” Remus murmurs, having crouched back down, “hey, Snakey, you here with me?”

“Mm…”

“Good. Here,” he says, raising a metal straw to Janus’s mouth, “you gotta drink something. You’re not looking so good.”

Janus opens his mouth and immediately winces when he feels something creak. Remus curses softly and summons something else.

“Alright, Snakey, I’m gonna sit you up a little. Hey, hey,” he soothes when Janus whines again in protest, “you’re not going anywhere, but you gotta rinse your mouth out. Trust me.”

Janus lets Remus—he doesn’t have much of a say in this, he’s still far too cold, but he trusts Remus—sit him up and lean him against something, tilted so his mouth is over a bowl.

“Here,” Remus says, holding up another cup, “it’s just warm water. Try and rinse your mouth out a bit, huh?”

Janus does, obediently taking a small mouthful and spitting into the bowl. Well, he more just…opens his mouth and lets it fall. There’s blood. And it’s going everywhere because he can’t aim like this.

“Hey, uh-uh,” Remus murmurs when he mumbles an apology, “you do know who you’re talking to, right Snakey?”

“’S messy.”

“If you think these little things are messy then I haven’t been working in the common area enough. Shh, shh,” Remus chuckles when Janus immediately protests, “I’m kidding. Mostly.”

Janus just keeps washing his mouth until it runs clear and it’s not as bitter anymore. Remus sets the bowl aside and raises the first straw to his mouth again.

“It’s just warm water and honey, it’s not gonna do anything to you. I promise.”

“…sure?”

“I’m sure, Snakey,” Remus hums, holding Janus firmly with his warm, warm arms, “I wouldn’t pull anything when you’re like this.”

He wouldn’t, Janus knows, he’s just…very tired.

“There you go…” Remus gentles him back to the ground when he’s had his fill, picking up the dry brush and rubbing it carefully over one of his shoulders. “When was the last time you brushed your scales, Snakey?”

“…mm.”

“Oh, Jan-Jan…” Remus shakes his head and strokes the brush down his arm, patiently working across the scales. “There…that’s better.”

The brush’s stiff bristles slide neatly between the scales and clean out even the most stubborn of detritus. Remus works patiently around the rest of his non-scaled skin. The bristles are too rough when they’re not on the scales. It’s quiet, just the soft buzz of the lamp and the scrape, scrape, scrape of the brush. It’s warm.

“Snakey,” Remus murmurs after a while, “do you think you can roll over for me?”

“…must I?”

“You can talk again,” he chuckles, along with a gentle poke to his belly, “that’s good. And unless you don’t want me to get the other side, you gotta roll over.”

“…help.”

“I gotcha.” Remus gently works his hands under Janus’s side and lifts, carefully letting him rest on his stomach. “There…you can breathe okay, yeah?”

“Mm.”

“Good.” The brush returns, working slowly over and over the scales. “You wanna tell me what happened?”

“Nothing.”

Another gentle poke to his side. “Don’t lie to me, Snakey,” Remus chides, “you don’t let yourself get like this just because.”

“The others are just…just…mm.”

“I know, but still.”

Janus sighs. He tells Remus how the others were cold. Not unkind, just cold. Remus hums, switching the brush to his other hand.

“It’s gonna take them time, Jan-Jan.”

“I’m not angry.”

“But it’s still nice to hear, yeah?”

“…mm.”

Remus finishes with the brush and carefully sets it aside, rolling Janus back so he can look at his face. The warmth is starting to seep into his bones, sinking him further and further into the floor. Remus chuckles.

“You gonna fall asleep there, Snakey?”

“’S warm.”

“I know, that’s the point. You can sleep, that’s okay. Want me to stay?”

Janus reaches out blindly for Remus’s sleeve. Remus lets him pull him down into the shady spot outside the heat lamp, pulling Janus a little closer. He’s not as warm as the heat lamp.

“If you wanna go ahead and fall asleep there, you do that. I’m not gonna go anywhere.”

It’s quiet. It’s warm.

“You’re doing great, Jan,” Remus whispers, “this shit is fucking hard on everybody. It’s gonna be okay.”

A warm hand settles on his belly, rubbing gentle circles.

“You rest now,” comes the murmur, growing longer and lower as it slowly becomes the only thing Janus can hear, “rest, Snakey…you’re warm now.”

Warm…

“You’re gonna be okay.”

…warm…

“Everything’s gonna be okay.”

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