#but they were never meant to replace the hamsters

[magratpudifoot]

Also chiming in on the pro-hamster side! Honestly, I am pro-all fuzzy sweet rodent babies, but I had syrian hamsters for 20 years, and it would have been almost 30 years of hamsters by now if my partner weren't a cat person.

I've had affectionate hamsters, I've had angry little antisocial divas, I've had hamsters that didn't care about anything but escaping. I had one who would sit completely still next to me and listen to audiobooks while I worked (he had favorite narrators).

I have been bitten many, many times...but 1) I started keeping them when I was in elementary school and *deserved* to be bitten because almost no one makes sure 8 year olds are taught how to respect the personal space of a hamster before they hand the poor critters over, and 2) my horrible demon cat sinks her teeth into me at least twice a day (she is my precious kitter, but she is THE WORST), so I've racked up WAY more cat bites in 7 years than hamster bites in the previous 20.

Anyway, I want to shake Huck's perfect little paw and pet him between those amazing ears <3

Hamsters baffle me. I don't think we keep them in Australia (I've never seen one in meatspace) and they make no sense to me as pets. Everything I've learned about them makes them seem like a shittier discount version of a pet rat.

[hasufin]

Consigned to memory

You know, it's kind of wild what's been, and lost, online.

And yes, I know about The Internet Archive. It's a wonderful tool and I'm glad it exists. But it's not, you know, complete. It's a privately funded effort by some very dedicated people, but it's not a complete snapshot of any particular point in our cultural history.

So once in a while I think about resources I once had, or just random things I wonder about.

I recall walking by where someone had painted "Cheetah Corner" with a URL in San Francisco. It was just a webcam looking out a window on that intersection, with a big statue of a cheetah in the foreground. No idea what happened to that.

For a long time there was just this one Japanese-English translator online. It wasn't smart the way they are now, but you could put in a word and it would find you a variety of words with a little bit of context as to what each one meant, because there are no direct translations.

I recall entire webcomics just gone - abandoned by their creators, unindexed and unavailable.

I remember End of Innocence and Project Rose Signet, fan works to make English-language transcriptions of the anime Shoujo Kakumei Utena.

And, hell, just try to find HamsterDamned, or even the original Hamster Dance.

Now, most of these things were running on some university's server, or just in a static IP provided to a dorm room. So I get why they're gone. But it feels like nothing really replaced them. TPTB figured out how to commercialize the web, which was the goal, you know? To get everyone to embrace the new technology. But they didn't join us, they colonized, and now there just doesn't seem to be a space for these quirky little labors of love anymore. If it can't sell banner ads, it doesn't exist.

So now I'm thinking about how I'm never going to listen to that unhinged audioplay someone made in '99 which I never got around to downloading, and it's surely on someone's computer but it's not online anymore, and all we have left are Tiktoks which end up deleted because they're interesting but never cross the line into sufficiently profitable to become a business.

[innertragedywerewolf]

Face Swapping with PTool: Because Why Not Replace Your Boss with a Hamster?

In the vast, wild west of digital tomfoolery, there exists an art form that's as practical as it is perplexing: the art of face swapping. Enter thePTool AI Face Swap online free tool—yes, the one that goes by PTool, no need to get fancy here—and suddenly, the world is your oyster, or at least your Photoshop canvas. You've probably asked yourself, "What's the point?" Well, my friend, I'm here to tell you it's about time you indulged in the deeply satisfying, if slightly sinister, pleasure of replacing faces with, well, anything.

Imagine this: You're scrolling through your vacation photos, a documented history of sunburns and ill-advised hats. Suddenly, a dastardly idea strikes. Why not swap your own visage with that of a more photogenic travel companion? Enter Deepswap, a term that, when whispered in the right crowd, triggers a conniption of joy. It's the process of swapping out your mug with another, a process that can change the most banal of selfies into a piece of performance art that would make Banksy reconsider his entire career.

Let's get down to brass tacks. Have you ever looked at your reflection and thought, "You know what this face needs? The spunk of a gerbil"? No? Well, maybe you haven't been using PTool correctly. It's simple, really. Upload a photo, select a face, choose a new face—or an animal, or an inanimate object—and voilà, you're a new person. Or at least, you appear to be. I've seen some faces swapped with such finesse that I'd bet my last Bitcoin that those pixels were never meant tofraternize.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating for a life of deception. But where's the harm in a little fun? It's not like you're going to run for office with a swapped face. Yet, the technology is so seamless that I've had to do a double-take more than once, questioning the very fabric of reality. Is that who I think it is, or is it just a clever PTool trick? Deepswap has made us question everything, even our own selfies.

But what's the real allure here? Is it the thrill of change, the laughter that ensues when you show your friends your new "face"? Or is it something darker? A peek into the kind of world where identity is so malleable that we can become anyone—or anything—we desire? I'll let you ponder that while you swap your face with apug.

Let's talk NSFW mode for a moment. Because if there's one thing more entertaining than a well-executed face swap, it's an NSFW face swap. Remember, kids, if the image is allowed to be used, you can let your imagination run wild. Swap your face with a celebrity, a historical figure, or my personal favorite, a deepfake of yourself as the lead in a popular sitcom. It's like being famous without any of the hassle of actually doing anything.

Now, here's a question that's been lingering on my mind like a bad batch of lutefisk: What does it say about us that we find such joy in this? Are we celebrating the versatility of technology, or are we running away from our own reflections? Are we trying to connect, or are we just lost in the maze of our own narcissism? I'm not here to judge, folks. I'm just here to swap faces and ponder the existential dread that comes with it.

I've tried it all. From swapping my face with my dog (who, by the way, now looks more human than I do) to swapping my face with my boss (who, to be fair, now looks more competent than he did). It's all in good fun, right? It's the digital equivalent of a practical joke—harmless, yet delightfully subversive. And thanks to PTool and the wonders of Deepswap, the possibilities are endless.

So, the next time you're feeling a little too comfortable in your own skin, remember there's a whole world of face swapping out there just waiting for you. Hug the absurdity, delve into into the surreal, and swap your face with something entirely unexpected. After all, who needs a mirror when you've got PTool?

[what-if-nct]

Tagged by @jonghyuns-husband, thank you for tagging me!!!

•what was your ultimate bias doing at the exact moment they became your ult?

Yixing was crying right after EXO won their first win. That made my heart melt into a puddle.

•if you were stranded on an island, which idol would you want to be stranded with, and which one would you wanna toss back into the ocean?

I want to be stranded with Kyungsoo I feel like he'd know what to do and have everything under control I just know he has survival skills. Baekhyun's getting tossed into the ocean, he'll be as useless as me but more annoying.

•name the kpop song you go to when a non-kpop friend hands you the aux.

Double Knot, you can never go wrong with Double Knot.

•alternatively, if you’ve had aux privileges revoked due to kpop, name the song that took away your right to have the aux.

Cat & Dog - TXT, I'm already on thin ice for playing 21st Century Vampire by huddy. If I play Cat & Dog I'm getting kicked out of the car. As much as I love Cat & Dog, I just know. I just know. I'd play Sticker before i play Cat & Dog in the presence of a non kpop fan.

•if your bias hadn’t debuted in their group, what other group could you see them being in (and why)?

Exo cause Johnny was almost in exo, it's the only choice.

•what’s the funniest thing your ult has ever done?

When Yixing completely lost his mind when all of those birds were tormenting that poor man. He just gave his sanity up. When Johnny drove off without Mark and Doyoung. And When Bangchan lost his sanity over spicy ramen, he was just fighting for his life.

•have you ever been biaswrecked into having more than one bias? if so, who was it, and who are your current biases in that group?

Hell yeah, I have like 30 biases. Half of that is my nct biases alone.

Exo: Yixing, Chanyeol, Kyungsoo and (reluctantly) Baekhyun,

NCT: Johnny, Yuta, Jungwoo, Hendery, Xiaojun, Jaemin and Shotaro.

Stray Kids: Bangchan, Hyunjin, & Felix,

TXT: Yeonjun, Huenging Kai, & Beomgyu.

•name an idol collaboration you would love to see that hasn’t happened yet.

NCT x Doja Cat, I don't know if this what it meant. But I would pay to see NCT x Doja because their music sounds so good together and I need it, gimme.

•what’s one trait in particular that you share with a bias? i.e same laugh, same starbucks order, etc.

Yixing: Spaciness, Yixing can be really spacey and need to be snapped back or he's just not really paying attention. And I don't know what's going on 80% of the time.

•describe your worst date ever but replace the name of your date with your biaswrecker.

Oh god okay. So Jeno picked me and the first thing he said was I was bigger then he thought I would be then continued to apologize the entire drive when he saw it made me sad. Then Jeno was telling me how he actually had a girlfriend and he was cheating on her because she was cheating on him. And also about how he did a lot of different drugs so his mind was a little messed up. After we got dinner and we were just hanging out Jeno started to cry while I went down on him so I told him we didn't have to do anything and Jeno spent the rest of the time talking about his girlfriend till he took me home.

•if your favorite kpop song was a flavor, what would it taste like?

My all time favorite kpop song? I have to say it's Heart Attack and Lotto - Exo Heart Attack's flavor is lemon-lime. I can't explain it's just lemon-lime. like a bottle of sprite. Lotto, is Pink Lemonade with batteries in it, no i will not elaborate.

•what group would you most want to play cards against humanity with?

Stray kids, Chan Struggling, Seungmin being completely out of pocket, all of the screaming and laughing perfect.

•name a random animal off the top of your head. what idol do you associate with this animal?

Hamster, and yes Jisung but also Shotaro, he also looks like a cute little hamster with those cheeks.

•what’s the last comeback you stayed up all night for?

Dude, Boy In Luv - BTS and that was a long time ago, it was the last time i was able to do that I was like 20 , being an actual adult made me slow down as a kpop fan. I didn't get fully back into kpop till the end of 2018.

•and finally, what’s one song in your kpop playlist that you would totally lose your mind over if it came on in a grocery store?

Wolf - EXO, Love Talk - Wayv, Wolf Gang - Stray Kids, like absolutely feral. especially if Wolfgang comes after wolf

I tag: @karetahana @hopeticket @farraige25 @melingie @theficblog

@hyuckieslove @violetwinters @morningsunandnightsky and anyone who wants to do it.

Also sorry if i tagged you twice already.

[what-yadoking-likes]

I have made a list of my favourite arts I made this year.

January: hamster painting. Made in protest at the Hong Kong government's decision to cull over 2200 hamsters in an attempt to contain a possible hamster-to-human transmission of covid-19.

February: a tiger to commemorate the Year of the Tiger. As one of my student's famously wrote about tigers, "Him head have wong" (the markings on a tiger's head, apparently, resemble the character 'wong', meaning 'king').

March: a portrait of Hong Kong Dog Rescue dog Miss Piggie, & a bisexual colour palette Guan Yin, inspired by the multicoloured Buddhist statues seen during a day trip to Peng Chau. Guanny has always been a role model to me of sorts. I miss my altar to her - all being well, she will be reunited with me in January 2023.

April: macaque portrait (based off a photo in mine & partner's SD card taken at Kam Shan country park, AKA Monkey Hill), & a psychedelic cat.

With the cat, I wanted to experiment with unusual colours for an everyday subject. I like how it turned out.

May & June: no art was made at this time that I want to share. May was also the month I got kicked out of Hong Kong. I have wanted to create something to capture what Hong Kong meant to me, but it is a huge undertaking & have not yet been able to come up with a concept that does it justice - perhaps I never will.

July: my portrait of Jacket from Hotline Miami. I raced through this game & its sequel as a means of dealing with my loneliness & frustrations at being kicked out of HK. It gave me a sense of control in my life when I felt very unsafe, unstable & depressed. I replaced one eye with a bird's foot trefoil flower, which represents revenge, in the opposite eye to where Beard's glasses break in the art for Hotline Miami 2.

August: didn't make anything I liked. This month I moved out of my sister's place & into my own flat where my partner (who had also left HK) & I were reunited.

September: cat gazing at the moon, & an Autumnal vibes painting. I was exploring my witchy spooky side upon returning to England, because I realised that I had nothing to gain from continuing to not explore that side of myself. I also realised Autumn was approaching & I was excited af about seeing the leaves change colour for the 1st time in years.

October: portrait of a distinguished gentleman, & an Autumnal chalk pastels scene. Both of these were part of the projects for my art class - I would end up exhibiting both of these pieces in the end of semester exhibition held in the run-up to Xmas.

[thefanficmonster]

I may or may not have just sent the 3 word challenge in my real account instead of anon... I'm sorry. Please don't answer there. :)

When you post, post answering here please.

Again, much love,

📚🌻

Don't worry dear! Your identity shall remain a secret 🥰 Here's yet another fic with my Resident Evil OC: Gwen Winters (she’s an adult guys, don’t worry. However this is still an Older Man/Younger Woman relationship)

The words dear  📚🌻 Anon gave me in their previous ask were: Unruly, endurable and system. Please enjoy!

What happens in the gym....

Pairing: Chris Redfield x Female OC

Warnings: Swearing, Spoiler Free 😊

Genre: Angsty Romance

“Sure, throw me in the fire like you always do, Leon!“ Chris snaps, clenching his fists tightly as he glares at his best friend while the two stand in the dimly lit gym.

“Chris, you’re a BSAA captain, for the love of God! You should know better than to complain about something as little as this!“ Leon, while significantly calmer tone and demeanor-wise, is glaring daggers of his own.

“Why me, damn it?! And why her?!“ Chris is not done with his attempts to get out of the situation Leon’s trying to land him in and his partner’s honestly done with it.

“And why not?! You see the same potential I see, why would it be so hard to train her? She’s a quick learner, she’s disciplined when she wants to be and she’s already skilled to a certain degree. You’ve made soldiers out of total wimps before, why is she such a hassle to you?!“

“Because she’s disciplined when she wants to be and I guarantee she won’t want to when she’s around me. She’s unruly, selfish, arrogant and a Chris-phobe. I’m telling you, she hates me!“

It’s about time Leon’s had enough of this conversation. To be honest, he was done with it as soon as it started but he stayed, thinking he’d be able to change Chris’ mind but seeing as how this is a hopeless case, he’s just been wasting his time. “Does she? Or are you projecting your hate for her onto her?” Slinging his duffel bag containing his training gear over his shoulder, Leon finally makes that realization that these are ten minutes of his life he’ll never get back and storms out of the gym without another word.

Chris doesn’t attempt to stop him, in fact, he’s relieved he left. He sighs, silently hating himself for all the shit he said and how he meant none of it. It was all hard bullshit and he doesn’t know whether to be thankful or disappointed that Leon didn’t realize. Either way, he’s been cleared of possible suspicion, even if training the newest BSAA rookie still remains as his task.

Gwen Winters, she’s such a fucking handful. One cannot tell if it’s because she’s angry with the world, angry with herself or just straight up picked up on the habits of the family that took her in when she was rescued from Raccoon City where she was held as an experiment hamster. A chemistry project basically. Ethan and Mia were recovering from the events back in Louisiana at the time, still probably are, that is not some shit you get over, so they thought having another person in the house would help them. And help Gwen did. See, Gwen isn’t a handful with everyone. In fact, she’s a real sweetheart and Chris knows it too, despite his bogus claims. He knows she’s got a heart and soul of gold and is built with the will of a BSAA soldier already. All she needs is a bit better fighting skills and she’s good to go. 

He sees how she acts with everyone around him. She’s been quick to make friends with Jill and his sister Claire and she’s even got Leon’s liking and trust which is hella hard to get, especially after all the shit with Ada. She’s overall a super sweet and lovely girl, even with him from time to time. He’s seen her welcoming, friendly smiles whenever he stops by the Winters’ home. He’s heard her laugh at the jokes he rarely cracks.

Then why does she act like she hates him so often? And why does he claim he hates her?

Chris is snapped back to reality by the sound of rough impact. It’s a very distinct noise, one he places immediately: the sound of fists hitting a punching bag. It’s the middle of the night, almost midnight actually, and knowing how lazy the soldiers on his team are, he can only assume it’s either his sister or Jill, given that Leon just left. However, they’ve had people sneak in to train for free before, so it’d be for the best if he went to check who was releasing some pent up energy on the poor punching bag. Judging by the intensity of the punches being thrown, sounds like the person might be angry as well.

And they have every right to be. Because they are Gwen.

Chris’ face goes a bit red at the sight of the infuriated rookie giving the punching bag her all, punishing it the way she’d want to do to her superior she just heard call her all the names she hates being referred by.

“Winters I-“

“Unruly?“ Punch “Selfish?” Punch “Arrogant?” Punch

She stills herself, sighing and wiping the droplets of sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand, “You say all that and expect me not to be a Chris-phobe?” She lets out a bitter laugh, rolling her shoulders before continuing her wrath over the piece of equipment she’s threatening to destroy. She hasn’t spared him a single look yet, something he’s rather grateful for because the last thing he wants to see is whatever her gaze is hiding right now. “I’ll talk to Leon.” She says, her voice leveled and breathy, far from the pissed off tone she was just using. This calmness is a lot scarier though. “I’ll tell him I don’t want you to be my trainer. To be perfectly clear, I never wanted you to train me in the first place. I’m just not the type to complain, you know. I’m not picky. Beggers can’t be choosers. I take what I can get. And you were all I was offered, but...” she trails off, delivering a particularly hard punch, “It’s not gonna work. I may not be picky, but I know when to draw the line. I know when I deserve better.”

“Kid, you really have no idea what the case really is here.“ He attempts desperately, taunted by the thought of acting on his instincts and approaching her even if that means being the recipient of one of those hard punches.

“You know, I’m strong. I’m skilled. I can hold my own in a fight quite nicely. I’m endurable. I’m not afraid to work my ass off and sweat and pant like a dog after workouts. There’s not a line I wouldn’t cross, but you still choose to make me feel lesser than any soldier you’ve ever come across, that’s really lovely of you, Captain Redfield.“

“Winters, please...“

“It’s ok, I won’t tell Ethan and Mia. I’m sure they’ll send you to hell over it. I’m not petty like that.“

He’s had enough. He’s had enough of hearing that hurt tone in her voice. He’s done hearing these words she’s so certain are true but aren’t. He’s done lying to her and to himself. Before he can even think twice about it, he grabs her by the arms gently but firmly, turning her to face him despite her hostile attempts to free herself from his hold like a wild animal caught in a trap. He’s surprised when she relaxes, probably seeing that as a quicker way out of the situation rather than struggling though if she tried to free herself any longer he would’ve probably let her go.

“Fucking hell, Gwen, listen to me.“ He looks her dead in the eyes, catching onto the spark of shock created by his use of her first name. But he also sees something else, something that looks dangerously a lot like tears. He knows she won’t cry, especially not in front of him, but knowing that he’s the cause behind the welling of those crystal droplets in her always shiny, always smiling eyes breaks him. When she doesn’t look away nor protest, he continues, “I can’t be your captain. I can’t be your trainer. I can’t be any of that. I’m a strictly professional man, and it’d be highly unprofessional of me to take you in as my soldier.”

“But why?“ She’s fully aware she sounds like a whiny kid - exactly how she thinks he envisions her sometimes - but she couldn’t care less. She wants and needs answers. She knows she won’t be able to fall asleep or keep coming back to the training center if she doesn’t get them.

It’s blatantly clear this is far from easy for Chris. His first instinct is to look away, let go of her, run away like he always does - not that she’d let him do such a thing but still. He’s finds the words impossible to spit out yet he oh so desperately feels the need to get them out of his system. And so, he gathers all the strength within him and finally forces himself to say it.

“Because a captain isn’t supposed to look at a soldier the way I look at you.“

Sure, it sounds cryptic as heck but he has no doubt she’ll catch on. Gwen is a smart and sharp girl, among many other things. She confirms this when barely three seconds after he’s said it, he notices her eyes widening

“Sir, I-“

“Don’t.“ He says simply, a small, regretful smile playing across his lips as his hand slides down her arm to take hold of hers, “I just admitted my dirtiest secret to you and you are still gonna remind me how unprofessional I am by using my title, Kid?“

She purses her lips, the shock momentarily replaced by her signature mild glare, “Well, you just admitted your biggest secret to me and yet you still choose to call me ‘Kid’, huh?”

He chuckles, letting his other hand repeat the movements of the first, “Sorry, force of habit.” His thumbs brush against her knuckles briefly as his head falls, his gaze fixating on where their bodies are connected, “You know, I didn’t tell you this to get myself any pity or anything. I just wanted you to understand and....wanted to get it off my chest. Ethan will kill me if he finds out, won’t he?” He suddenly asks, regaining the courage to look up at her once again.

She giggles, “Who says he’s gonna find out?”

Chris bites the inside of his cheek, shaking his head, “You’re right, there’s nothing really to find out abo-”

Gwen has never been a chatter nor can she tolerate when people beat around the bush so she’s quick to cut them off sometimes, no matter how rude that may seem or sound. However, just to clarify, her chosen method of cutting a person off isn’t always kissing them. Just saying - this is a special situation requiring special methods.

Taken aback by the sudden feeling of her lips on his, Chris’ eyes close automatically but not even a second later he responds to the kiss properly: wrapping his arms around Gwen’s waist as her hands travel up to cup his face. The kiss is short - too short if either of them is to be asked - but it’s worth all the words they didn’t say despite wanting to.

When they pull away, Gwen gives him a mischievous smile, “Now he could find out about that and then shit would go south. That’d suck, wouldn’t it Chris?“

He’s only ever heard her say his name twice, once in passing conversation with Claire and once earlier when she paraphrased his term ‘Chris-phobe’, both time spoken with some dose of dislike he now realizes was a cover-up all along. Turns out the two are a lot more alike than they initially thought. Regardless, hearing her say his name with fondness instead of bitterness makes his heart flutter, his body yearn to have her closer, his lips wanting to be in contact with hers again. But he’s a patient and self-controlled man, he’s nothing if not willpower sculpted in a human body, so he keeps his distance, waiting for her to pick the moves, waiting for her to make the decisions just like she’s his captain.

“Big time.“ He manages to say, voice coarse all of a sudden, barely able to leave his throat. “So it stays here, right?”

She giggles again, bringing her lips within an inch or two away from his, taunting him, threatening to break his self-control, “What happens in the gym stays in the gym, Redfield.”

Golden rules of discretion, ones he mustn’t break ever. Especially not when his captain - Captain Gwen Winters - holds so much power over him.

[doberbutts]

A lot of pet store rodents have parasites too. Dewormer can cause issues with fetuses, and bad breeders don't want to pause a breeding to give dewormer. The babies pick it up from their mother, and the cycle continues.

Plus add in how many small pets like that never go to the vet because their illnesses are never noticed or they're considered disposable pets. My vet was super happy I monitored my hamster's behavior and activity levels and made an effort to social him, especially because he said the breed I picked tends to be super stand offish and bitey. Which, is fair when you weight less than a croissant and people constantly scoop you up all the time.

(Plus I'm not gonna lie, I do take a smidgen of pride in my vet praising me for my pets always being very well behaved when I take them in)

I feel really bad for the rats sold in stores, since they're often going from what amounts to a drawer to a tiny tank environment overcrowded with zero enrichment to often a solitary existence in the equivalent of a rat-sized closet. My rats were livestock meant for my snakes, but they had a far better existence than what a lot of pet rats sold in pet stores get. And at least their deaths came quickly and painlessly, not choking on URIs or shitting out parasites alone with no care and no companions until they died and their owner replaced them with another one.

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

𝐴𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑧: 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝐺𝑒𝑡 𝐴 𝑃𝑒𝑡 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝐻𝑒'𝑠 𝐽𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑠

❥𝓚𝓲𝓶 𝓗𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓳𝓸𝓸𝓷𝓰

Feeling bad for not being able to keep you company because he spent most of his time in the recording studio, Hongjoong decided it would be cute to get you a pet.

So on a free day, you went to the pet store and looked at all the animals.

From the beginning, you both knew you wanted a pet on the more 'exotic' side of things.

That's how you ended up taking home 2 sugar gliders.

You named them Mocha and Latte, cause they reminded you of coffee.

At first, it was difficult cause sugar gliders are nocturnal, so either they were bustling in their cage, waking you up.

Or you were pouty cause you couldn't play with them during the day.

"Have fun with them!" Hongjoong would tell you before leaving.

And you'd always respond "Yeah right".

Your sleep schedule changed because of them though.

You started staying up at odd hours of the night just to play with them.

Of course, that meant you'd sleep in till almost noon the next day.

Meaning now Hongjoong was seeing, or at least, spending less time with you.

And he was pouting.

Pouting cause he got home early but you're sleeping and can't hang out with him.

Pouting cause he wants to fall asleep next to you and cuddle you but you're too busy playing with the Mocha and Latte.

So you looked over at him, sitting up with the tiniest pout on his face.

"What?" You asked.

He whined cutely. "You're not interested in me anymore!"

You simply snorted at how cute he was when he was jealous.

You put the gliders back in their cage and settled next to your boyfriend.

"Maybe now you'll understand how I felt when you'd leave me alone for the whole day. "

Hongjoong looked at you and realized you were right.

He couldn't really complain, he got you the pets specifically cause of that reason. But still....

"That didn't mean replace me completely!"

❥𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓴 𝓢𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝔀𝓪

Seonghwa agreed to get a pet with you so you'd have someone while he was gone.

He knew you tended to get lonely while he was on tour, so maybe a pet would be nice.

"But please let's get something that won't make too much mess."

So you took his OCD into account.

That's how you ended up with Pepe, a cute green and red parrot.

He actually didn't talk at first, he was a little shy.

But after a while, he started saying words here and there.

That's when you decided to teach him a few phrases yourself.

"The possibilities are endless. I will teach him the entire dictionary."

Seonghwa just shrugged, not really paying attention.

"Ok you have fun with that. But he's a parrot, I doubt he's that smart."

Pepe was indeed smart, incredibly smart.

And if you rewarded him with crackers or berries, he learned even faster.

You spent any second free you had with him.

Literally, you got out a dictionary and made him learn at least 5 new words each day.

Surprisingly, he learned more by watching you communicate with Seonghwa, picking up phrases you used.

That's when a funny moment happened.

Seonghwa was mad that you no longer hung out with him.

And the few times you talked, you just went on and on about how smart the parrot was.

Scowling he blew up one day.

"All you ever talk about is that stupid old bird!"

Pepe, hearing some of his words, suddenly blurted out.

"Stupid angry bird Seonghwa! Stupid angry bird Seonghwa!"

He repeated what he often heard you mutter behind his back whenever Seonghwa made you mad.

"Stupid what?!" Seonghwa's eyes nearly popped out of his face while you just laughed at him.

❥𝓙𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓾𝓷𝓱𝓸

Yunho couldn't wait for you two to get the puppy you adopted.

He was super excited at the thought that you two would officially become parents.

So when your Welsh Corgi finally arrived, he was over the moon.

"I'm going to name you Peanut and we're going to spend so much time together!"

Meanwhile you stood behind him like "I'm his owner too! Don't I get a say?!"

Yunho and you spent so much time with the puppy.

He was a very active puppy, and at times you had to definitely scold him.

Cause he liked to chew the furniture, especially the legs of your kitchen chairs.

Yeah, one time it was so chewed up, the chair ended up breaking while you were sitting on it.

It was too much for you, you considered taking the dog back.

"No please don't! He's only a baby and doesn't know better!"

Yunho insisted he'd train him better.

That was bullshit cause he ended up having to go on tour for 6 months, leaving you to raise Peanut as a single mother for half a year.

You sighed. "Might as well get used to it."

You were amazed that without Yunho interfering, Peanut behaved a lot better and you were able to train him.

So you became even closer to him.

Soon he became your baby that you loved to pamper and cuddle with.

Yes, Peanut ended up sleeping with you in your bed.

When Yunho came back, not only was he surprised that Peanut didn't recognize him...

But Peanut actually barked at him whenever he got close to you.

"I'm just trying to give my girl/boyfriend a hug!"

And when you two were getting ready to go to bed, Yunho couldn't even join you in bed

Cause Peanut was already cuddled up next to you.

So Yunho stood there with the saddest look on his face.

"Did this dog seriously just stole my place?"

❥𝓚𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓮𝓸𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓰

Yeosang layed down on the couch, hoping to relax from an intense day of dance practice.

He closed his eyes, already feeling like he was going to sleep anytime soon.

He felt something tickle him on his nose and he giggled, not bothering to open his eyes.

"Baby, not right now. I'm tired. Let me rest first. Then I'll give you some cuddles and kisses."

He then felt nibbling on his nose which made him raise an eyebrow.

"What are you- Holy shit!"

He fell out of the couch after he opened his eyes and saw two large beady eyes, that were definitely not yours, staring straight into his soul.

"Yeosang? Are you ok?" You asked stepping out of your room.

"Something just tried to eat me! Do you think I'm ok?!" He exclaimed.

You looked at him on the floor and saw what was the cause.

"There you are Cookie! I've been looking all over for you."

Yeosang just watched as you picked up the rabbit that he deemed menacing.

"I'm sorry, but I don't recall you having a pet?"

"Nope, but I saw him while I was shopping for groceries and thought why not? And what do you mean my pet? He's also gonna be yours"

"Uhhh come again?"

It's not that Yeosang didn't want Cookie around.

But he found him rather bothersome, especially since he liked to hide in corners and jump on his ankles.

Sometimes he'd even let out a cry of pain cause Cookie likes to bite his feet.

And through all this bullshit, you never take his side.

You're always taking that damned rabbit's side.

"Honestly, what's so great about him? I have big sparkly eyes too! And I can eat lettuce cutely. Watch."

And Yeosang legit grabbed a piece of lettuce and ate it like an actual rabbit.

Meanwhile you just cringed.

"Please don't get jealous, it doesn't suit you and please don't ever do that again."

Yeosang let the remaining lettuce fall to the ground, just like his will to compete with the big eared furry.

❥𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓢𝓪𝓷

When you told San you were planning on getting a sibling for Byeol, he was expecting another cat.

He just stood there staring at the long nosed, long eared whiskered animal on the floor.

He pointed at it. "What is that?"

"That's Tiny!" You exclaimed happily.

"It's not a cat?" He asked rather confused.

"I know! It's a fennec fox! Isn't he adorable too?!" You were just so happy.

San was wondering if it was even legal to keep it as a pet.

Spoiler: it was.

San did think Tiny was cute and he didn't really seem to be vicious, despite it being an exotic animal.

Tiny was actually very sociable and active.

Unlike Byeol, Tiny needed you to play with him almost every 2 hours or it'd get bored.

And when he get bored, he'd start snarling and eventually growling if you didn't pay attention to him.

It freaked San out the first time he heard him snarl.

"What the fuck kind of demon possessed you?!" He shouted, causing Tiny to become more agitated

You quickly ran in, with a rubber bouncy ball in your hand.

"Hey it's ok! I'm here! Now go fetch!" You said as you threw the ball to the other side of the room.

Tiny immediately ran for it and spent a good amount of time searching for it.

"That thing is possessed!" San told you.

"You get possessed when you're on stage. Tiny is just bored and wants attention." You explained.

"I want your attention but you don't see me growling at you."

You rolled your eyes. "No. You just get whiny and fussy."

San scoffed and walked away to the couch, glaring as you played with the fox.

Looking over, he saw Byeol laying next to him, just staring.

He smiled. "Hey babygirl, wanna play with me and make Y/N jealous instead?"

Byeol simply stood up and walked to another part of the room, leaving San all sad on the couch, feeling lonely.

❥𝓢𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓲

"Mingi, I want you to meet Coco!"

You held up the brown ferret against Mingi's face.

Being the scaredy cat he was, Mingi backed away immediately at the sight of the unusual pet.

"Relax! He's not going to eat you! You big baby." You said

"What kind of rodent is that?" He asked, inspecting the creature.

"He's a ferret! Think of him as a long and stretched out hamster." You explained as you cooed at the cutie pet.

"Well if he makes you happy, I guess ok."

He did make you happy. You had never had a pet of your own, so obviously you doted on Coco as if he was your whole world.

Your social media now was filled with pictures and videos of the ferret.

"Coco, look at the camera! I need that Instagram pic!"

Seeing your social media bombarded with nothing but the ferret made Mingi upset.

Before you used to post only pictures of him.

Now.....a long rat has invaded your relationship.

Or at least that's what he thought.

"You pay more attention to that rat than me!" He huffed.

"He's not a rat! He's a ferret!" You shouted.

Finally getting fed up, Mingi took away the ferret from you and told it to run along.

He then pulled you into the couch and wrapped his long limbs around you.

"We haven't cuddled in a long time. I want at least 20 minutes of your undivided attention each day."

You smiled and petted his hair. You couldn't blame him for feeling neglected. It had been a while.

You turned around and began kissing his face.

His frown suddenly turned into a smile and he was happy again.....

Until Coco climbed into the couch and popped out from between your bodies.

"Oh my god! You had them all day! I've only had them for 2 minutes you cockblocker!"

You started laughing at his reaction and quickly put Coco on the ground before anything else happened.

❥𝓙𝓾𝓷𝓰 𝓦𝓸𝓸𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓰

"Babe! I'm finally home!"

Wooyoung sprinted from the couch, running up to you and wanting to see you open the portable cage you held.

"Is it here already?! Tell me is it a boy or girl?! What breed is it?!"

He was jumping for joy since he knew you decided to go buy a pet.

He immediately thought you meant a dog. He loves dogs and just wanted to start playing with it.

"Wooyoung, this is Ginger! Our new baby!" You said as you held up a tabby orange cat.

Wooyoung suddenly stopped jumping and stared at the cat for a long time.

Then he looked at you with an 'are you kidding me' expression.

"It's a cat." "No way! Really?! If you don't tell me, I wouldn't notice!" You replied sarcastically.

Wooyoung stomped his foot. "I thought you'd get a dog!"

"What? No! You know I'm a cat person."

Wooyoung clutched his chest at what you said, gasping dramatically

"I don't know you anymore! You're not my girlfriend/boyfriend! They've been replaced by some maniac cat person!"

You just rolled your eyes and decided to enjoy your new pet.

You just loved Ginger. She was so calm, so serene, well behaved and obedient.

She also seemed to know when you were stressed or feeling down since she'd then climb on your lap and nuzzle herself to your body, purring softly.

She melted your heart and you did not regret adopting her.

Wooyoung on the other hand did not like her, and started disliking her more since Ginger never listened to him.

He didn't realize she could sense his animosity and therefore proceeded to avoid him.

"Seriously what does Y/N see in you? You don't fetch, can't do tricks and you certainly don't guard the house. What are you good for?"

Ginger just continued lying on the couch, ignoring him.

"Hey don't ignore me you little butter ball!" He said as he tried moving her.

But before he could even touch her, she began hissing at him, daring him to come closer.

"What are you doing to my baby?!" You screeched from the kitchen.

"I didn't do anything!" He then turned and pointed a finger to the cat."You know... for a pussycat, you sure are one hell of a bitch!"

❥𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓙𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝓸

Jongho had been getting really tired of the pet raccoon you decided to get.

First of all, he kept coming to your house, making a mess outside cause it kept looking through your trash can.

Of course being the softie you were, you kept leaving food out for it.

So naturally it came coming back for more and practically lived outside your house.

"I told you if you kept doing that she'd end up staying." Jongho reminded you.

"It's actually a he. He's a boy." You corrected him.

"Geez. You already know that much, why not just bring him inside and just make him your official pet?" He said that sarcastically but wasn't expecting you to take it seriously.

"Ok!" You then went outside to bring it in.

"Wait! I wasn't being serious! It's a wild animal and could have rabies!"

Despite his protests, you ended up keeping him, taking him to the vet to get him vaccinated and checked on.

That's how Bandit was now a part of your life.

And true to his name, he stole your heart.

He was so adorable and fluffy and you just loved cuddling him.

It certainly felt nice since Jongho rarely cuddled with you, so of course you seeked affection from your raccoon.

Bandit was also pretty mischievous, but you didn't mind. You just kept thinking he was absolutely adorable.

Jongho on the other hand was having his patience tested every day by Bandit.

He'd often find his socks ripped or missing and he had a pretty good idea who it was.

He finally caught him red handed tearing apart his last pair of black socks.

"That's it! You're dead I tell you! Dead! Square up! I ain't afraid! I will fight you!"

Jongho actually began taking off his jacket and holding up his fists.

Bandit also began snarling and arched his back in a fighting position.

You walked in just in time to stop Jongho or Bandit from launching at each other.

"What is wrong with you?! Were you seriously about to go Jack Jack on a raccoon?!"

"He started it! Beneath that mask, he's evil!"

You decided to just keep them away from each other before you end up with animal control on your front door.

Gifs not mine, credit goes to their respective owners.

[lilallama]

How would hybrid BTS react to hybrid bunny y/n? How would owner Y/n react to seeing theirselves as a bunny? I bet that would be confusing because Jennie is just as confused.

[I hope this was what you meant, honey ^^. 💕🍑]

While the sun shone down upon the perfectly trimmed bushes in midst of the Kim family's garden, seven Hybrids were impatiently waiting for their owner to return. All were seated at the beautifully decorated white table and chairs, Jeongguk stomping rapidly with his foot while Jimin munched on the biscuits set on the table. Everyone snapped around when they heard someone open the big door that leads to the garden. When they saw Y/n's head peak out they hurried over, Hoseok jumping on them with Taehyung scolding him for being careless. Namjoon hurriedly made the move to tear the Guinea Pig away but stopped in his tracks. "Wait.. You don't.." Yoongi, who had stayed seated at the table, eyed the "Y/n-Imposta" with suspicion. "That's no- YOU'RE NOT Y/N!" Jeongguk yelled and dragged Hoseok away. Jimin started screeching and running around, Jeongguk shouted at the other bunny Hybrid while Taehyung viewed them in confusion. The small Hybrid covered their ears, curled up and teared up.

"What's going on here?" Y/n, the REAL one, walked towards them with a stern expression. Jennie followed her, once her eyes rested on her Hybrid cowering on the floor she threw the boys a glare. "Which one of you dared make my little bunny cry?" The aggression in her voice made the Hybrid shake and huddle together. "Jennie, please, I'm very sorry. But don't be angry at them,.. yet." The momentarily relief on the Hybrids faces was suddenly washed away and replaced with a mix of concern, fear and guilt. "B-but Y/nie~ Look at that!" The hamster pointed at the bunny, "It copied you!" "What're you talking about, Jimin?"

Everything went silent as the bunny slowly looked up, whiping their tears away. She looked exactly like Y/n but with big fluffy ears attached to her scalp and a fluff ball over their bum. "W-what..?" As they looked around with innocence, Y/n and Jennie locked eyes. "I- Why- Why does your Hybrid look uncannily like me?" Jennie responded with her hand over her mouth, "I didn't realise, my goodness.."

The Hybrids will never trust bunny Hybrid Y/n because they are "copying Y/n". But they will eventually learn not to exclude them like a bunch of ten year old in an all-boys club.

If you enjoyed reading my work, please consider reblogging it. Thank you for reading

[ask-the-clergy-bc]

I think this is okay to ask...but how do you think the papa’s would react to their s/o or friend losing a pet? (im sorry if this is weird i just lost my hamster so its been on my mind)

I’m so sorry about your little friend :( Losing a pet is never fun! Much love to you!! 

I’m going with the reader being an S/O, as you would get more of a personal response from the Papas than if you were just a friend or a casual acquaintance. 

Minor trigger warning for Animal/Pet Death

Papas When Their S/O Loses a Pet

Papa Nihil: Definitely has the most typical dad reaction to the lose of your pet. Offers to help bury/flush/scatter ashes of your pet so you don’t have to do it alone. He’s never been good with helping those when they lose an animal, as it’s a different way to console someone than it would be losing another person. But Nihil knows what it’s like. He once had a beloved pet Tiger that had to be put down. He remembers his own heart break at losing her and knows you must feel the same way. Chances are, Nihil is a bit tone deaf about it and presents you with a fine painting of your pet in remembrance to them! Just something he thinks would make you smile, since he got a painting to remember his tiger! If that doesn’t work he’ll take you to the nearest breeder to adopt another pet. 

Papa I: While he is not the most sentimental person on the planet, he understands the importance of it. Especially with the lose of such a beloved companion as your pet. Initially Papa just supports you when you are hit with the loss for the first couple of days. After, he might ask if you would like to do some small memorials or make mementos of your pet. If you lost an animal like a cat or a dog and had their ashes, he might offer to let you plant them in a spot of his garden. Or he would surprise you with a framed picture you can keep next to their urn. Something that would make you smile and remember your companion fondly. 

Papa II: While Papa is not the most visibly upset, he does feel awful that you are so hurt. He might not have been as close to your animal, but he knows how much your little friend meant to you and your life. Papa goes out of his way to track down an animal that looks almost exactly like the pet you lost- preferably one that is still young and growing. So don’t be surprised if you lost your fluffy white bunny only to wake up one day to a small fluffy bunny in the living room! Papa knows it can’t replace the love but it’s the only thing he can think to do to make you feel better other than just sit there and do nothing. 

Papa III: Absolutely hates to see how heartbroken and devastated you are. Chances are, though he does not grieve as hard, it hit him in the heart too. Your pet was an important part of your life and therefore, an important part of his. Papa loved to bond with your companion. He would hold you and do whatever he could to make the passing easier on you, no matter how big or how small. But he might be eager to take you to get a new pet when you are feeling a bit better about it. In his mind, this is the perfect opportunity to open your heart to another animal who needs a good home! You have to be careful because he might pick out the animal for you! 

Papa IV/Cardinal Copia: Takes it the hardest as he has the most sympathy. He knows what it’s like to lose a precious pet. Copia’s reputations proceeds him when it comes to animals. Though his own feelings are conflicted about his reputation, he does have a love and respect for rats. He’s kept quite a few as personal pets in various times of his life. And truth be told, they don’t live long. So he completely understands the utter heart break when yours crosses the rainbow bridge. He’ll hug you and stay with you as you grieve, just letting you get all of the icky feelings out. Copia would also assure you that you gave your companion the best life they could have possibly asked for. When the time was right he would offer to take you to get a new pet if you so wished! 

[writeyouin]

Swerve X Reader – Changes - Chapter 6

Chapter 6 – The Arena

A/N – I finally came back to this, my poor abandoned baby.  As usual, a special thanks to @rocksinmuffin​​ without whom, this story wouldn’t exist.

Warnings – Minor suicide mention.

Rating – T

“That is the cruellest thing I have ever seen you do,” Swerve glowered at you.

“It had to be done. There was nothing else for it,” You replied nonchalantly.

“RODNEY DID NOTHING WRONG.”

“He existed.”

“SO YOU JUST KICKED HIM OUT FOR EXISTING?”

“Look, you get to choose your Animal Crossing villagers, and I get to choose mine.”

“Abuse them, more like,” Swerve pouted.

“Fine, do you want to play on the switch and adopt an ugly-ass hamster who does nothing but bitch all day?” You asked, holding the console out to Swerve.

He took it from you, placing it on the tallest shelf in the hab-suite, “You can have this back when you learn kindness, you monster.”

“… That’s just mean,” You said, looking despondently at the shelf which was labelled No Man’s land. Beside the switch was a copy of Harry Potter which had been removed from you until you could read it without yelling at Snape every time you saw his name, and several pictures of Getaway which you had scrawled insults on; Swerve wasn’t punishing you for those, he just liked admiring them every now and then while you worked on new insults to scribble.

“Okay, fine, you can have it back right now, if you say that hamsters are cute,” Swerve grinned.

“Clearly, you’ve never seen one in real life. They work for the devil and steal people’s souls. I’m ninety percent sure that they also have armies ready to-”

Pain wracked your body and you woke up screaming to find your captors prodding you with weapons akin to cattle prods but much larger and stronger. It was the same creatures that had captured you.

“WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?” You yelled through the pain.

The humanoids didn’t reply, staying eerily silent; you wondered whether they were even capable of communication in a way that you might understand.

“All right, that’s enough… For now,” A human called, stepping forward, looking completely out of place among the others.

Your captors backed away, leaving you alone with the human on the opposite side of the cell. You glared at the woman, who couldn’t have been older than thirty. She wore acidic green armour that bore a symbol of a decapitated robotic head with wires and cables sticking out from the neck; the ensemble made you nervous.

“So… You’re our newest contestant. How dull,” She commented boredly, examining you.

“Contestant? What do you mean?” You asked fearfully.

Once again, you were left without a reply as the woman pulled out a dictation machine and began talking into it as if you weren’t there. “Subject is of questionable build. A Minibot. No definable insignia – probably a NAIL. Presumably no fighting skill of which to speak. No weapon attachments that can be seen. One noticeable draw to the crowds is that it’s a female – a rarity in itself.”

“Oh my God, are you- Fuck, are you putting me in the hunger games?” You demanded incredulously.

“The bot uses organic terms in communication. It’s possible that it has spent much of its time around organic communities rather than with its own kind.”

Although you knew you could argue that you weren’t originally a Cybertronian, you decided that it probably wouldn’t get you very far with your captor; she was clearly only interested in her job, whatever that was. You doubted that you would get anywhere talking to her.

“So that’s it? You’re going to put me into an arena to fight? Did I get it right? Hey! HEY, I’M TALKING TO YOU. YEAH, BITCH WITH THE BAD HAIR, YOU!”

The childish attempt at an insult earned you a bemused glance, and the woman paused the dictation machine.

“You ought to mind your manners, or you’ll be in a much worse condition before the fight, and that will only bore the spectators,” She warned you.

“I’ll behave, if you at least tell me your name. I’d like to know who I’m insulting.”

Your roguish attitude earned a sadistic smile; it wasn’t every-day that your captor met a Cybertronian with any spirit left, “Lady Ouida.”

“Stupid name,��� You murmured, mostly to hide your fear. “So I’m right about this being a colosseum of sorts?”

“Yes. You are to fight in the arena.”

“And if I win, I go free?”

“No. If you win, we kill you anyway. The people are out for Cybertronian blood after all.”

“Wow… That’s so fucking stupid. Like for real, did you take this out of a book? It’s not very creative is it? How many movies have you seen where the hero is thrown into a death ring to battle? Plus, there’s not going to be much of a fight. I mean, look at me. My arms are all fucked up from your bodyguards, I’m clearly not a fighter, and I’m like only three feet taller than you. Factor in multiple opponents and you get a five-minute fight, tops which will mostly be me running for my life.”

“You don’t seem too concerned with your fate.”

“Bitch, I am terrified, but I’ve seen death and been dragged back from it. I have defined the meaning of an out of body experience. Right now, I am competing with forces that you cannot even imagine in a brain that was not meant for me. In other words, there is nothing you can do that is worse than what I’ve been dealing with for the last forty-eight hours so GET FUCKED.”

The words PERSONALITY MALFUNCTION appeared on your visor, and you knew they were true. In your human form, you tended to avoid confrontation where you could. However, faced with the prospect of unavoidable death, it didn’t seem to matter anymore. There were only two options left for you anyway. Die in an arena, or wait for the Lost Light to come to your rescue. As you stared into the grinning face of Lady Ouida who had developed a sudden interest in you, you hoped it was the latter.

Chromedome sat miserably in the brig, having been put there for attempting to forcibly alter Swerve’s memory banks with mnemosurgery. He had lost count of how many times he had been in that exact scenario, where mnemosurgery was the only way forward, but nobody else would see it that way. How many times had Rewind refused to talk to him because of it? How often had he been forced to alter Rewind’s memory afterwards so he wouldn’t leave him? Chromedome held his head in his servos, thinking of Rewind. He wouldn’t believe it if Chromedome said it was all for Swerve. So what if mnemosurgery felt good, as long as it helped people it wasn’t that bad. Sure there were risks, but there were risks to all sorts of things that people did anyway.

With nothing else to do but think of his failure, Chromedome waited despondently in his cell, with the faintest of hopes that Rewind might deign to visit him, even if it was just to yell.

Ultra Magnus watched the security footage stoically from the computer panel in his office. As well as Chromedome, he was also watching Swerve, who had been restrained for his own safety and was sobbing loudly, screaming your name, and Whirl who was in the med-bay, awaiting yet another energon transfusion. Of the three, Whirl worried Ultra Magnus the most; he was not taking well to Ratchet’s surgery. He had damaged one of his internal components beyond repair and it was now up to Perceptor to create a suitable replacement. The replacement would undoubtedly need constant maintenance for the rest of Whirl’s life if he survived, but it was the only way forward.

Ultra Magnus looked up as the door flew open, and Rodimus came barging in.

“THIS IS A DISASTER!” Rodimus roared.

For once, Ultra Magnus didn’t have the spark to placate Rodimus; he was right, everything was going disastrously.

“WHIRL IS DYING. CHROMEDOME IS ALL KINDS OF MESSED UP. REWIND BLAMES ME FOR WHATEVER REASON. SWERVE IS SUICIDAL AND (Y/N) IS MISSING. Please tell me you have something that might help fix this mess?”

“I do not,” Ultra Magnus replied quietly. He had never felt like such a failure. Under his watch, everything had gone wrong. The Magnus armour was getting heavier every day; he didn’t deserve to wear it.

“FRAG! WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO? SHE COULD BE IN DANGER. THE ROD POD’S TRACKING SYSTEM IS FRAGGED. THE CREW ARE FURIOUS. THEY HAVEN’T BEEN THIS MAD SINCE-”

“OUT OF THE WAY, COMING THROUGH,” Nightbeat’s voice called in the corridor as he weaved through the few bots out there and made his way into the office with Megatron close behind him.

“Rodimus. Ultra Magnus,” Megatron greeted professionally, before gesturing for Nightbeat to take over.

“I FOUND (Y/N),” Nightbeat began ecstatically, completely missing the sombre atmosphere.

“What? How?” Rodimus asked, dumbfounded.

“I watched the Rod-Pod’s ejection from the bay and followed it through the security cameras. After that, it was simply a matter of predicting several plausible trajectory’s considering that (Y/N) isn’t a pilot-”

Rodimus waved his arms, “Forget I asked. Just tell me where she is.”

Nightbeat ignored his disappointment that the big reveal had been ruined; it had taken a lot of work for him to covertly listen to all the radio stations where you might have landed and then locate you from that. “She’s on a privately owned planet called The Arena.”

“The… The Arena?”

Megatron nodded solemnly, “Yes. My research tells me that they capture stray Cybertronians and-”

“Don’t tell me. They put them in the arena ‘cos they think that’s creative… Primus, that’s annoying. All right, plan time. We change course, go to The Arena, break in, rescue (Y/N) and make everything go back to normal. Any questions?”

Megatron took a moment to consider the plan, “How-”

“No? Great. Then let’s go. We’ve got work to do.” Rodimus transformed and drove out of the office to head to Brainstorm’s lab. He had brushed it off with his usual casual demeanour but just like everyone else, he was furious that anyone would want to hurt you. If he was going to rescue you, he would need weapons; the morally-grey kind that Brainstorm made.

Swerve sniffled, feeling pathetic as coolant that he couldn’t wipe away under his constraints dripped down his front. Yet another failed suicide attempt to go on his record; he couldn’t even do that right. He remembered the last time he had done something so drastic, when you had come to save him from himself; you had probably only married him out of pity. Despite the depressing thought, Swerve found himself unable to believe it. You had married him because for some reason that he didn’t understand, you loved him. The two of you had spent one year married and it had been the best year of Swerve’s life. When you brought up the idea of sparklings on your anniversary, Swerve couldn’t believe that life could be any better, and now after all of that you were gone.

Although Swerve longed to wallow in self-pity, he couldn’t help thinking of Chromedome. It seemed that his last conversation was finally sinking into Swerve’s processor. What was it he had said exactly? Swerve vented air through his systems, calming himself so he could isolate the memory file.

“YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT (Y/N)!”

While it was true that Chromedome could have just said that to stop Swerve from ending his life, there was also a slim possibility that Chromedome really did have new information about you.

Swerve kept replaying the memory’s audio, listening for the truth. As a bartender, he liked to believe he was good at separating lies from the truth, but when the other bots were sober, he wasn’t very good at it.

“(Y/N)…” Swerve whispered your name, wondering what he might not know about you as of that moment.

What if you had come back and he was wallowing in his cell, too wrapped up in himself to know about it? It wasn’t possible. If you were back, it didn’t matter what state Swerve was in; he would have been taken to you. Unless…

Swerve struggled to sit up, his processor racing with endless possibilities pertaining to your fate. What if he hadn’t been taken to you because your new body was failing? What if you were dying and Swerve wasn’t there? What if he was the only one that could help you?

Unbalanced as he was, Swerve managed to stand up. He started kicking at the door, yelling as loud as he could.

“HEY! GET ME OUT OF HERE! TAKE ME TO MY WIFE! TELL ME WHERE (Y/N) IS!”

Swerve didn’t pay much heed to what he was saying. All he cared about was getting to you, no matter what it took.

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[asongeverlasting]

Happy Holidays @adrienettes-hamster!! I was your backup gifter for @mlsecretsanta this year! I hope you enjoy this platonic Ladynoir bonding :)

Many thanks to @strangerahne for beta-reading! 

Laughing in the Starlight

read on AO3

Marinete had known this was a bad idea the first time he suggested it, but that meant nothing. Even with all the luck in the world, she could never hold out against his kitty eyes and impassioned pleas for very long. One would think she'd have some sort of immunity, after babysitting Manon for so long, but no dice. It was almost as if his kitty eyes were magically augmented or something. No ordinary human should be able to expand their pupils that wide. It was just ridiculous. (Utterly ridiculous, her internal monologue supplied unhelpfully.)

And really, it was just a game of Truth or Dare. As Chat Noir helpfully pointed out the third time he tried persuading her to play, if she was really worried about secret identity things, nothing was stopping her from just choosing dare every time. Eventually, after two weeks straight of him bugging her during patrol, she gave in. Sort of. 

Her acquiescence was accompanied by a number of ground rules designed to safeguard their identities and avoid injuries (practically a necessity when pitting two teenage superheroes against each other in a game designed to embarrass). She also added three vetoes apiece, just in case. Going into the game, Ladybug felt confident that she was prepared for anything, because her rules accounted for every possible awkward situation — and they would have, were her opponent anyone but Chat. Right now, sitting on an isolated rooftop three rounds into the game, she knew she'd made a mistake. Nothing could have prepared her for what he was throwing her way.

“Okay, so, imagine you were suddenly turned into a peach pit that was inside of a ripe peach and on a tree, and then the peach fell off the tree, sprouted, and you grew out of it back to the body you were before turning into the peach pit. Then imagine all this happened in the span of twenty minutes. What would be the first thing you did after all this happened?"

Her brain refused to compute. “Sorry, what?”

Chat just smiled earnestly at her, eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Did- did someone turn me into the peach pit?” she stammered, totally taken aback.

“Take it however you want, I just want an answer to my question.” Chat seemed shockingly normal for someone who had just spouted the most ridiculously out-there question she'd ever heard. Did these sorts of thoughts just exist in his brain?

How did one even begin to handle such a situation? But then again, stranger akumas had happened. “I guess I’d… first try to figure out how I’d been turned into a peach in the first place—“

“Peach pit, you mean,” he prompted, leaning forward.

“Yeah, that.” She rolled her eyes. “I’d probably also grab another peach off the tree to use as a weapon if I needed it. Oh wait, are the other peaches also people?”

His grin grew even wider before he responded. “That’s for me to know and you to never find out”

She shot him a frosty glare and responded, deadpan, “Horrible.”

“So….. what would you do?” he asked, genuinely curious now.

“Hmm. Probably... pull a peach off the tree so I have something to throw, look for the culprit - which was probably an akuma, honestly - and if I find no one, then get to high ground and keep looking. Oh, and before I leave, toss the peach at you like so.” She picked up a small pebble from the rooftop beside her and threw it at Chat, who yelped and turned away.

“Hey, what was that for?" Chat pouted.

Ladybug winked. "That's for me to know and you to never find out."

"Ah-hah-hah I see what you did there," he said, shooting finger guns at her. "Very clever. Now, I believe it's your turn again, Milady. I hope you come up with something interesting." He quirked a brow in challenge.

"Alright Kitty-Cat, truth..." She paused dramatically. "Or dare?"

"Dare, if you please."

"Hmm…" she mused, glancing around for inspiration. An idea came when her eyes landed on a house with two chimneys, about eight feet apart from one another. "Oh! Okay, I got it. Stick your baton between those two chimneys over there, grab it, then swing and flip yourself onto it, landing on your feet. Dramatic dismount for bonus points."

The spark of excitement in Chat's eyes had grown with every word she spoke. As soon as she finished laying down the challenge, he leapt up gracefully and bounded over to the designated rooftop, Ladybug following close behind.

Unsurprisingly, he executed the sequence perfectly, swinging around his baton like a gymnast on the uneven bars before landing on it, striking a pose, and backflipping off, all with the grace of a jungle cat. 

She applauded as he put his baton away and sauntered over to where she now sat.

He gave a courtly bow before sitting down opposite her. "Only the best for the lady! My turn now, so choose your poison."

"Umm… I think I'll mix it up a bit with a dare."

"Okay, I dare you to…" Chat began slowly, "pick up the pointiest rock you can find, show it to me for approval, and then hold it in one of your armpits for the next two questions. Oh, and if you drop it at any point, the question count resets."

Ladybug shot him a dirty look before searching around for an appropriate rock. She picked up two, showed them both to Chat for inspection, and then unceremoniously stuck the chosen one under her left arm, taking care not to press too tight. "My turn now. Pick."

"Sheesh, someone's prickly! Something jabbing at you?" Chat snickered at the growl she let loose when his pun registered. "Truth! I pick truth."

She thought for a minute before speaking. "You claim that you're just a human with weird cat traits instead of the cat I'm convinced you are. Now, if I were right and you were an actual cat, what weirdly human trait would you have?"

Chat furrowed his brow in contemplation. "There's so many options to choose from! If I had to pick one… I'd probably make human sounds, either so my meows would sound like a real person making them, or so I'd scare the real humans in the house by saying 'hewwo' or something"

"An agent of chaos! Now, that sounds just like you. And I know better than anyone how much you hate not making human sounds," she chuckled.

He tried to mock pout, but couldn't hide his smile. "Okay, okay, my turn again. Truth or dare?"

"Ugh, I don't want to move with this thing under my arm. Truth."

With a soft laugh, Chat responded, "Well, now I know how to get you to answer my questions! Okay, okay, don't hurt me!" he exclaimed, raising a placating hand when he saw her glare turn threatening. "My question for you is… what name would you want to have, if your name wasn't what it is? And don't say this is against the rules, you could even give me your real name and I'd have no idea, so there's no way I can use this to ferret out your secret identity."

"Uhh…" She tilted her head to one side as she considered her options. "I'm not sure… maybe Celeste, or Isabelle? Or… Oh! I've always been partial to the name Bridgette, so I'd probably pick that."

"Bridgette, huh? I bet you'd have gotten along with one of my good friends. She's incredibly sweet and caring, like you. And her name sort of rhymes with your fake one! And she—" he cut his speech short, noticing that he was heading off on a tangent. "Anyway, spoilers aside, she's pretty great."

"Seems like Kitty might have a crush, hmmm? I hope this girl is worth your affections," teased Ladybug. "Must be something special if she's caught the eye of the great Chat Noir."

"Oh no, no crush! I only have eyes for you! I mean really, for yonder Tour Eiffel is the east, and you are my sun. This girl is… just a very good friend." The look on her face made it seem like she was intent on pursuing this line of teasing, so he hurriedly went on. "Also, I pick dare, and your rock dare is finished. You can drop the pebble now."

"Very smooth, Kitty," she said sarcastically, releasing the stone, "but moving onto the next turn might not save you. I can still dare you to answer a truthful question, don't you forget."

Chat's eyes widened briefly in shock before his expression morphed into his patented kitty pout — peeking out from beneath his lashes, pupils blown wide and shining, lower lip stuck out and quivering, head tilted to the side just so. "You wouldn't do that to me, would you? That would be so mean!"

She narrowed her eyes and met his pleading gaze with a stony stare of her own for a few moments, but then broke away with an exasperated sigh. "Fine, I'll play nice. But one of these days I'm gonna figure out how to defeat your pout, and then you'll be in for some serious trouble," she warned, waggling a finger at him. "Okay, your dare is to… sing about a minute of a song, but replace every fifth word with the word croissant. And I have to approve your choice before you start singing! Also, if you start laughing, you have to start again. Think you can handle it?"

"I'm all over it! Just give me a minute to think up the perfect tune to serenade you with!" he proclaimed confidently.

"No problem, just as long as there's no cat-erwauling," she said with a smirk.

He froze. "Wait, was that a pun?" 

She looked at him, a sly smile playing at the corners of her lips, but did not reply.

"Not gonna admit it, huh? That's fine. I think I have just the song for you. Go ahead and stop me if you don't approve." He stood and bowed like a maestro walking onstage for a piano recital. "Now, just sit back, relax, and enjoy the show, milady."

With that, he began humming and plucking at an imaginary… cello? Bass? Some sort of large string instrument. He opened his mouth, and sang (in a surprisingly smooth tenor), "I've got a gal croissant always late, any time croissant got a date. But I croissant her, I've gotta ask her, croissant you is or is croissant ain't my babyy?" His voice wavered with suppressed laughter by the third croissant, but he pressed on, counting out words on his fingers as he mimed plucking the strings. Ladybug had no such luck holding back her giggles and had to bite down on her own hand to smother some of the noise. "Maybe baby's croissant somebody new... or is my croissant still my baby truuuue?"

Chat finished the chorus with a flourish on his imaginary instrument before promptly dissolving into peals of laughter and plopping down in a heap next to his partner. They both just sat there chuckling for a while, trying very hard not to look at each other — for every time they calmed down slightly and their eyes met, they burst into laughter and had to start the process all over again. Eventually, they managed to regain control of themselves and quiet down. Tired now, they laid down on their backs, heads beside one another, feet stretched in opposite directions, and looked up at the few stars visible in Paris's night sky. For several minutes, neither of them made a sound.

"Wow," Ladybug breathed, breaking the silence, "what a view. I could just lay here all night."

Chat hummed in agreement. After a few moments, he shifted and turned his head slightly so he could see her profile. "Hey Ladybug," he said softly. She turned to look at him. "Truth or dare?"

She smiled. "Truth," she answered, just as softly.

"If you were playing Max's akuma game, but with Disney/Pixar characters, and the computer chose Hawkmoth, which character would you pit against him?" When she didn't speak for a few moments, he continued, "Take your time, it's a very important decision."

Ladybug pondered her options for a minute or two, weighing the pros and cons of various animated characters. All of a sudden, inspiration struck, and she let out a quiet giggle at her stroke of genius. "Oh, I have the perfect idea: the Pixar lamp." And she turned to him expectantly, amusement and pride evident in her expression.

Forehead wrinkled in confusion, he said, "I don't get it. Explain?"

She propped herself up on an elbow so she could see him better. "Okay, um… look at it this way. He calls himself Hawkmoth, which is a species of moth, right?" 

He nodded. 

She went on, "And moths are attracted to light and heat, to the point that they sometimes act drunk around things like lightbulbs and small flames." 

Another nod. 

"Plus, take into account the fact that you and I have some traits from our namesakes — you purr and I snack on flowers." 

A rueful chuckle accompanied the next nod. 

"So, it makes sense that Hawkmoth might be attracted to lamps. But then, the coup de graçe: do you remember what the Pixar lamp does?"

"It… hops?" Comprehension dawned. "Oh!" he exclaimed. "I get it." He started to laugh again, softly at first, then louder.

Ladybug laughed along with him, trying to speak through her mirth. "So... hahaha... I'm just imagining *snort* Hawkmoth... heeheehee... trying to chase the lamp around, while this… sentient lamp... *giggle*… just keeps trying to bonk him and jump on his head!" She pressed a hand to her stomach, laughing until it was difficult to breathe. "We wouldn't even be needed anymore!"

At this, Chat laughed so hard that his voice was no longer audible, and he just lay there, shaking and gasping for air. Finally, he caught his breath enough to gesture wildly and choke out, "Milady, you're a genius! Hawkmoth would totally just be running around like… *snicker*… 'LAMPY! Let me love you!' and the lamp would be like *BONK* and then… bahaha… they'd be together forever! *snort* Honestly, this is more of a ship than a fight!" His arms dropped back to his stomach as he fell into another fit of laughter.

The two of them laughed and laughed until their stomachs ached and tears streamed from their eyes, and the sounds of their voices echoed across the Parisian skyline. When they'd nearly laughed themselves hoarse, a sense of peace stole over them, and their minds and voices grew quiet and calm once more. They continued to lay there for several minutes, soaking in the comfortable silence, feeling — for once — completely in tune with the world around them.

"Hey, Chat?" Ladybug murmured.

"Hmm?"

"I'm glad you're my partner. There's no one I'd rather be here with than you."

He smiled and gently touched his head to hers. "You and me, Milady. Forever."

Hawkmoth and the rest of the world could wait. 

Right here, right now? 

This moment was theirs alone.

[rvmmm21]

. you’re a monster .

summary : “what will you do when you’re knocked out in an alleyway and wake up tied to a bed. what next, hm?” the demon’s question rings in her head the entire time she’s being pleasured beyond comprehension. Kang Seulgi begs and pleads, and she reluctantly finds the answer.

small note : forgive the appalling pacing. sorry if i misinterpreted this and it was meant to be soft-ish, but when i saw monster i just went oh cool HARD-ish. also never thought i’d write seulrene but hey! first! i’m so sorry to all the seulgi stans out there, i know she’s soft but i... i saw ‘monster themed’ and i went :o i will softly make it up to you if i get another seulgi ask, i promise! also soft seul stans pls don’t read this if... um you’re not comfy with the concept. it’s hardcore.

[seulrene - demon!irene x human!seulgi]

tw : NONcon, overstimulation, light bondage, and the flippant overuse of the word ‘no’.

...

She tries to roll over in an attempt to relieve that dull ache in her shoulders, but to her dampened shock, finds she can do nothing more than shift about a millimetre away before being pulled back down. Numbness gives way to an accelerated heart-rate as she realises her predicament; with both wrists and ankles securely bound to a cold, metallic bed frame, she’s completely immobile. She gives an experimental tug to find that: the bedposts are dreadfully sturdy, and her binds are surprisingly soft and velvety. Like royal silk, she thinks, but in this light, or lack thereof, it’s impossible to tell.

O-Oh my god what’s happened? Where… where the heck am I?

The air is thick and heavy, but that’s not why Kang Seulgi is choking.

“How lovely. It’s been a while since I’ve had a human.”

The words smoothly puncture her focus; nonchalant and detached. It matches the smile playing on the blood-red lips she can just about see through the fog in her vision. That stare, those eyes; horribly searching, dark and sharp enough to pierce. And it pierces her to the point where it feels like she isn’t wearing any –

Wait. Where are her clothes? Any of them?

She’s stark naked. And it’s a shocking revelation, but the dipping of the mattress on either side really doesn’t grant any time to ponder. A shiver runs through her when two smooth hands start to explore her body without her permission; squeezing her, violating her. She realises just how unforgiving the restraints are when she instinctually struggles, kicks, does whatever to try to get them to stop. But the weight straddling her remains unmovable, and it just mocks her panicked writhing with a laugh like she’s never heard before. It’s undeniably a woman’s, but there’s something about it that makes Seulgi squint maladjusted eyes to sharpen the edges of the silhouette above her. Despite the intrusive groping, it’s slowly taking shape; it is a woman. And she’s drop-dead gorgeous, unfortunately. With long, pin-straight black hair, milky white skin, a deadly scarlet smirk and… when her top lip curls up just right… oh god… are those… does she see fangs?!

That not-so-subtle detail is enough to force the girl out of stunned silence.

A terrified shriek is followed by a breathless – “W-Who – what are you?!”

The hands stop. Everything does, for a while. And then there’s another laugh before her apparent captor ever so gracefully introduces herself.

“Sweetie, you don’t know me. Nor I you, for that matter…” her voice drips like molten lava, bright and scorching all the same, “… but that’s what we’re here for, isn’t it?”

Her response is overtaken by an almost dry heave when the demon woman above her sounds like she’s lecturing a rebellious 16-year-old.

“Pft, mortals,” she scoffs absentmindedly, rolling her eyes as if the human race is the most bewildering thing she’s ever come across. That’s before her tone turns into something sinister. “Living with your little blinkers on, walking home well past sundown, all alone and vulnerable. Never thinking about what happens if you catch someone’s eye… if you’re too adorable to resist? What will you do when you’re knocked out in an alleyway and wake up tied to a bed? What next, huh?”

The irony isn’t lost on Seulgi, and the gentle caress on her cheek does little to settle her terror.

“But lucky for me, humans don’t think like that, do they?”

“… y-you’re a – a m-monster…” Seulgi spits, trying to sound bigger than she currently feels. But it sounds more like a shaky whisper than an accusation, and it only succeeds in stretching that soul-eating grin wider than she’d ever thought possible.

A sinister, throaty laugh takes a rake down her ears and sends an uncomfortable chill prickling across her skin. “Oh, we haven’t even begun yet, darling… why don’t you save those lovely little nicknames for when you really need them, hm? Tell you what, you can call me Joohyun for now.”

The demon taps her on the nose in fake reward.

Seulgi isn’t even aware she’s squirming until she feels a cold hand clamp down on her left knee and shove it flat on the mattress with a dark chuckle. “Now, now, I’d conserve that energy if i were you… trust me, it’ll be gone before you know it.”

“… n-no! … get… get me out, let me go!” Seulgi screams, using all her strength to yank at the material keeping her captive.

Something in her hamster-beating heart drops with all her hopes when a pair of lips plant themselves on her cheek, ignoring the way she reels back in horror. “Run that pretty mouth all you want,” Joohyun sneers, eyes trailing downwards “... your body seems to know what it wants.”

What on earth does that mean? Seulgi is twisting around now, but Joohyun takes hold of her hips, pinning her down despite her futile attempts at freedom.

And then she finds the answer to her question.

The depravity of the situation weighs on her all at once when two fingers drag along the length of her slit, making her flinch. She sees them held up in front of her face, all slick coated. Just from that. When her mind goes blank, it shows. Enough for Joohyun’s determination to skyrocket and for long fingers to find their way back to the girl’s dripping entrance, teasing their way in slowly, curling them upwards. The look in her eyes, now the colour of glowing ember, as Seulgi’s body is forcibly provoked is almost playful.

Oh my gosh why… why does it feel like that… why does it feel… good. Of course, that’s something Seulgi is fully intent on keeping to herself, but she’s clearly not having much luck. Not while she’s rolling her eyes back, not while she’s failing to conceal those increasingly desperate sounding pants leaving lips she can’t seem to keep together… much like her legs. Joohyun just teases her some more, smiling at how painfully obvious it is that her little human is trying her hardest to convince herself she doesn’t want this.

She breaks sooner than expected.

Seulgi finds herself bucking up against it before she can stop, spreading further open so Joohyun’s warm, eager tongue has access to her sensitive clit, pressing on it, sucking it, just driving her insane. She’s grinding against the mouth as much as her binds will allow, thighs trembling violently with strain, but ugh – it’s worth every tremor.

“… wait – ah! Oh gosh! I –” The pressure on her clit increases to where it drives a keening whine from her throat, locking all her muscles in place as Joohyun draws out the first orgasm of the night.

The human barely has time to recover from the initial wave of orgasmic bliss before the demon is lazily undressing, only enough to reveal the textured length between her legs. Seulgi cranes her neck up, eyes instantly bulging at the latex. It’s somewhat hilarious that this… demon of a woman in all her hellish majesty has to brandish a fake cock. A small part of her wants to laugh at – oh god but she can’t – she can’t even think without moaning when said fake cock buries itself into her. It bottoms out with such ease it pulls out a painfully choked sob instead of any snide remark about the ability to ‘pound her into submission without the use of a strap-on’.

No. What is she doing? No, no, no... this is far too much to handle.

The darkness spins above her, as stupid as it sounds, it does. And that’s all she can stare up into. It’s dizzying, but she’s already tried looking down, and let’s just say the nauseating spin is much less… intense.

She’s so wet, Joohyun has no problem starting hard and fast, fucking her deep into the mattress, pushing past the initial squeeze of her walls and pounding into her with nothing less than pure animalistic force. And the human beneath her seems to be enjoying it too. Joohyun knows if her precious little human could see what she looks like taking her cock so well, she’ll flush a shade even pinker than the rose quartz blush trailing up her neck right now.

Poor Seulgi cries out, desperately trying to bring her knees together, but Joohyun catches them, keeping her spread with a demonic strength she can only dream of challenging. She knows she’s found her clit when she’s rewarded with a sharp hiss, and it only takes a couple of brisk taps on it before Seulgi’s walls are clenching down. She’s torn between screaming for it to stop, and ask - no, begging to let her cum again.

It’s horribly humiliating to consider, but she has to wonder whether it’s her begging or her crying that drives the demon harder.

“… J-Joohyun! I’m…” – but that’s all she gets out before she’s turning away to sink her teeth into her shoulder in the hopes of dulling the devastatingly intense sensation of multiple orgasms.

Sweet baby, Joohyun thinks as she watches her thrash and tremble and then go almost completely limp, my sweet little human, so breakable and so, so overwhelmed. She just smiles at Seulgi’s gasp when she swiftly replaces the sensation of the strap with those familiar fingers.

“… no, please… no – no more…”

It’s so much more fun having her humans ungagged, free to beg to their little hearts’ content. Because she adores hearing pitiful pleas dissolve into pained whimpering with a flick of her tongue or just a little more pressure behind her thumb. Joohyun finds it the funniest thing to watch human instincts in action; knowing it’s pointless, but still wasting their breath trying to reason with the cause of their suffering. The knowledge that her victim is too drained to fight back is an absolute blessing. The power she possesses is immeasurable and downright thrilling.

“… oh please, please Joohyun – don’t make – ah! –  not… not again, I – I can’t, please…”

But she’s helpless and she doesn’t get to decide when she stops, if she’ll ever. That’s up to Joohyun. And what Joohyun wants to do is keep fucking her well past her breaking point, she wants to keep teasing her overstimulated clit, she wants to torture her for as long as she can, either until she gets bored or the human passes out.

And she’s proud to admit, those struggles are definitely weaker than before.

Delirious Seulgi doesn’t even notice the fingers pumping in and out of her speeding up over the sound of her moans, increasing in frequency. This is about to be her… what, her fifth? Eighth? God, she doesn’t know… nor can she find the head space to care, really. Her mind is so blissed out from how rapidly she’s being fucked, to the relentless sucking on her sore, swollen clit, that she’s barely even aware she’s tipping over the edge.

Joohyun wears an evilly triumphant grin as she does. “That’s it, give it to me. My sweet little mortal.”

Still, Seulgi manages to rasp a weak – “… m-monster…” before she does, trying her best to put some bite behind the word. But it’s almost impossible to when she’s torn apart yet again, jerking and twitching as Joohyun’s mouth cruelly steals another orgasm from her. There can be no venom behind those adorable, breathless whimpers that grow quieter and quieter until there’s no more resistance. None at all.

Poor thing, she didn’t even know that would be her last one.

Soft breathing, tear-stained cheeks and eyes rolled back in her skull; Joohyun observes her wreck of a human, beautiful and unconscious because of her. She can’t even put a pretty name to an even prettier face yet, but she’s not worried in the slightest.

They have plenty of time for that.

[aliypop]

To The One Before

word count:  1,697

Warning: Mentions of panic attack

A/N : Heres a bit of backstory to my character I hope you guys Enjoy it!

"Family isn't who you're born with: it's who you'd die for."   Alexandra Morgan was 13 when she first heard that phrase from her best friend, Ray Stantz, "My family is like a tornado, Ray..." she sighed, taking a bite of Ray's Hershey bar. Ray knew what it was like to have parents who were perfectionists, after all: he was the product of a housewife and a doctor. "One day, I'm going to leave that house, and I'll never come back!" she laughed standing, on top of the hood. 

 "You don't mean that do you?"

"With my whole heart..." she smiled, sitting back down with him. Ray smiled back, saddened by the fact that she would say such a thing. "But what about me.. And.. and our ghost club!" he asked as Alexandra kept ranting on about her plan to leave home. 

"I couldn't forget my best friend." she took him by the hand and squeezed it,

 "Beside's, who's gonna protect you from Carl.." her thick glasses-covered eyes looked at him, 

"Well, promise me this, Alexandra..." he handed her a stay puft marshmallow. "That we'll always be friends even in college." 

"Why college?" she examined the marshmallow poking at the sugary treat. "Because... why not!"

"No talking to boys or looking at them, and if you do- " Dennis, Alexandra's, father was as nervous as most dads were when dropping their daughters off to college, but he wasn't as nervous as her mother, 

" If you get homesick, you can always call, and you know we're only 45 minutes away, and I got you one of those calculator things and!" 

"JEAN, you're scaring the girl! Dennis sighed, "What we're trying to say is strive for perfection ... anything less and.." 

"You'll pull me right out of this science jazz..." she sighed: ever since Alexandra had been little, her father never understood her passion for physics and doing experiments. He always knew that women got their brains from the pantry, not books, but Alexandra was different. When most girls played with easy bake ovens, she made nuclear reactors using antennas from their old tv set and jumper cables. Her inspiration came from some kid in Ohio who made one using chicken dung. "That's my girl... and remember.." 

"No boys," she sighed pushing, her glasses up, "As if any will ever like me.." she sassed. 

"That's not true, sweetheart," Jean said, lifting her daughter's chin. 

"Mother, must I remind you I went to prom with Ray!"

"And you two were a lovely pair." 

 Alexandra sat in her dorm, isolated from the rest of the world, which was how she liked it. A book in her hand and a pencil in another, she was ready to finish the first semester of work. As she listened to the radio, she began singing along with the Jackson 5. Ray, however, was wandering around with his new best friend, Peter Venkman, a Missouri native with the charm of a con man. Both Ray and Peter had been walking by the dorms in which the two had been talking about Atlantis. 

"It was just my imagination, running away with me. " a voice sang as the two were slowly approaching the women's dormitory.

  "Alexandra..." Ray gasped, running towards the sound of her voice. 

"Ray?!" she poked her head out from the door: as she saw the two men standing there, she couldn't take her eyes off of "This is Peter Venkman he's my.." 

"Friend replacing me already, aren't cha." she joked as she invited the two inside. There had already been notes on her wall as well as books on her floor. "I see you got busy..." Peter remarked, looking at the way her eyes sparkled through her glasses and how her lips curled. "Didn't class just start.." he thought to himself as Ray read behind her theories of time travel. 

" Because I know you didn't mean that in an innocuous way, I'll respond with Yes," she turned to look at him as her heart nearly skipped a beat, 

"Nerd much?" Peter whispered as Ray turned around in shock, he knew that that was a phrase that Alex never enjoyed hearing.

"I prefer to say an intellectual, but perhaps you wouldn't understand." she scoffed. "I beg to differ."Peter walked towards Alexandra, as he got closer towards her,

 "You're just a know it all.." he smirked, "Or a narcissist .." he said in a whisper, looking down at her lips. Alexandra laughed, noticing how close they were. She had never in her life been this close to anyone, especially a man such as Venkman. 

 "My father warned me to stay away from boys, you know.." 

" Well, I don't see your old man around..." he pulled her close to him as the heat from her face radiated fog from her glasses.

 " I'll pick you up, say 8 pm." 

"Should I bring my books?" 

"Sure, but I doubt you'll need them." he winked. 

As years passed and Ray and Peter grew closer as friends, so did Alexandra and Peter. It was a cold New York December morning, and sitting by the window wearing one of Peters shirts was Alexandra. Hot tears streamed down her face as she held her term papers in hand. In all her academic life, she had never gotten a D: her world was crumbling, "Hey, it's three in the morning.." Peter then looked at the half-empty bottle of brandy that he and Ray usually would split. 

"Do I need to wake Ray..."  

Alexandra shook her head, unresponsive to his question. "Wanna tell me about it.." he then asked, sitting in front of her. "I'm going to fail.." she repeated in heavy breaths, her hands nearly pulling at her thick curls. Peter had semi-studied this behavior before but to see it happen in person terrified him. "Breathe." he held her hand, Alexandra nodded, as she only breathed faster, nearly hyperventilating. "That's not what I meant, but breathing is breathing..." he mumbled. As the sun began to shine, the two were eating pizza and talking about their families. 

 "Try having a father who is not even proud about his son going to college. 

"Try being a music prodigy by age six and science prodigy at 9." she laughed, "I have so many expectations set on me and..." she looked at Peter, who gave her a look she knew too well. Peter, although now a part of the parapsychology world he still was great in psychology. "You did it again.." 

"I don't know what you mean.." he smirked. 

"Oh, I could just!" she stood up, falling into his arms. "Kiss me.." he suggested, kissing her lips ever so sweetly. There were days when Peter was a gentleman, sweet and caring, but there were days when Alexandra would throw curses his way and wish she'd never see him again, days where she'd cry in Ray's arms, and all he could say was " Peter didn't mean it this time did he..." he asked watching her stuff her face with pizza and ice cream. "We broke up again.." she cried, "Because I got offered to teach at the university.."  

"That's good!" Ray smiled, "I mean, it's what you've always wanted, right?" he then stopped talking. It was true that Alexandra wanted to teach quantum physics and engineering, but to see Peter move on so fast when she told him the news only made it worse. 

 As time went on and Alexandra had gotten adjusted to her new life as a professor, her date life only sunk worse. 

"Alright, class, I'm Dr. Morgan today we'll be talking about the theory of Relativity.." Alexandra turned towards her class in which she heard the protest of groans. The year was 1984, Alexandra: was 31 years old and living in Manhattan. " I assume you took Dr. Spengler's theory class, or else you wouldn't be in mine." she glared at a few students over her glasses. To say that Alexandra's quantum physics and engineering classes were easy was an understatement.

 From her labs to her assignments, there was nothing easy about her not since, "Can I help you, Dr. Venkman.." she glared at him, nearly wanting to set him on fire. "Just looking for a few students who'd want to do a few paid experiments," he smirked. When paid was involved, it meant Venkman rather than the students. "Make it quick, Venkman.. " she rolled her eyes. As her lecture progressed, she noticed a pair of eyes staring at her, they were stern, a bit cynical, and they were listening to her rant about the theory of being in a paradox. 

"So if you were to see yourself uh.. " she kept looking at him as her mind went blank, and her heart nearly pounding. "You could ruin the structure of the world." the voice in the back responded.

Sitting at her desk as her students left, Alexandra took it upon herself to stay behind and work on her UPC or more so known as an ecto camera. As she heard heavy footsteps run past her classroom, she knew that it was

 " Ray?" 

"We got one!" he shouted, ushering her to follow him.

"Is it a 1 or 5?" she asked him, following him around to their lab. 

"She wasn't very friendly..." 

"So a five it i-" she stood in front of their door, watching as the dean removed their gear from their lab space. "Well, that's unfortunate ..." she whispered under her breath, looking up at the man who was in her class earlier. 

"What am I supposed to tell my mother.." he mumbled. 

"What are we going to do now!" 

" I say drill a hole through Peter's head.." Alexandra said under her breath as Egon smiled, "So you're a fan of trepanation too." he asked as both Peter and Ray tried to get her to switch the subject. "I always say that if done right, could cure a disease if done wrong, a lobotomy or death. " she shrugged her shoulders, "Although I wouldn't advise it on a hamster," she added. 

"Why's that?" 

"Makes them go crazy..." she laughed, looking at him, "I'm Dr. Alexandra Morgan." 

"Dr. Egon Spengler."

[thewritewolf]

Stop, Rewind, Romance

Aspik has finally done it, the highest point of his superhero career - asking Ladybug out on a date! Now he just has to make sure that nothing goes wrong...

@adrienaugust

Enjoy!

Read on Ao3

There wasn’t much left for Aspik to do but fuss over the details while he waited for Ladybug to show up. As he made sure the roses were in just the right position and all the candles were lit, he couldn’t help but marvel that she had actually said yes.

Was it because he had worn her down so much as Chat Noir?

Maybe the black cat miraculous was bad luck? That would explain that when Plagg got sick and had to get healed by the current Guardian, his love life immediately improved. Well, it improved once Ladybug, looking for a new, temporary, partner to replace Chat Noir had knocked on Adrien’s window with the Snake miraculous.

Of course, he hadn’t been bold enough to ask her out then and there. The mask gave him an extra boost in confidence that he just didn’t have when he was a civilian. But after a few akumas… getting used to the Snake miraculous all over again… She held out her fist for him to bump and it slipped out.

She ran away with a panicked screech, but by patrol that night she hugged him and said yes. His lips quirked up at the memory. He got the distinct feeling that the hug was to keep her from running off again, which helped ease his worries a little. It meant that he wasn’t the only one feeling nervous about tonight.

“Just about ready?”

Startled, Aspik fumbled the lighter and watched it slide into the alley below. He groaned and turned around to see Ladybug looking adorably bashful as she covered her mouth in embarrassment.

“S-sorry. I didn’t… I wasn’t trying to scare you.”

He gave her a small smile. “Don’t worry, I was wrapped up in my own head. I was probably going to get startled no matter what.” He let out a defeated sigh and spared one last glance toward the alley.

“I see you dressed up for the occasion.”

Aspik looked back at Ladybug, whose eyes sparkled beautifully with mirth as she looked at his neck. He smirked and stood up straight.

“You like my bow tie?” He tugged at the ends of the high-class black piece. “I thought I’d better go all the way for this…” His nerve suddenly abandoned him and his mouth went dry. “...this d-date.”

Her face flushed red, but she smiled all the same. Her eyes tracked over the scene he’d made.

“I can see that.” She grabbed one of the roses and held it to her nose, breathing in deep. “You really did go overboard, didn’t you?”

“Well… you’re worth it, after all.” He pulled out her seat. “Shall we get started?”

Still blushing, but smiling confidently, the twinkle of good humor in her eye, she nodded.

“Let’s.”

Unbeknownst to her, as he made a big show of sitting down, he slid the timer on his bracelet up. This was going to be the best date he could make it, even if he had to try it over and over and over again.

-------------

Aspik held his hands up as if to defend himself, eyes wide as he looked at the looming anger of Ladybug across the table from him.

“I just meant-”

“What?” Ladybug said, leaning forward and narrowing her eyes at him. “What exactly did you mean by saying Chat Noir was useless?”

Desperately trying to get a hold of the situation, Aspik tried to cut in. “I didn’t mean it like-”

“He’s my partner!” She wasn’t letting him get so much as a sentence in. “I’m not going to sit here and listen to you bad mouth him like that.” Ladybug leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms angrily as she stayed out at the horizon. “Remember you’re only here temporarily. I’d have him back in a heartbeat if I could, but he still needs… rest.”

“I…” Aspik reached out, only to stop in the middle and set his hand down with a sigh.

The date had been going so well! On the one hand he really was touched that he as Chat Noir meant so much to her, but it was also hard to explain he didn’t have a grudge against… himself. But he couldn’t really explain that without bringing up that he was Chat Noir. Then again, she’d probably still be upset even if she knew he was talking about himself.

Well… that’s why he had Second Chance, at least. To keep his stupid mouth from ruining things for him.

Time for another shot at the perfect date with Ladybug!

-----------------

“So, um… yeah.” He finished lamely. “That’s why I’m pretty tired today.”

Ladybug shook her head in disbelief. “I knew you had a busy schedule, but… that just sounds awful. I can’t believe they have been running you ragged like this. And that’s on top of school stuff! Not to mention the superheroics.”

“N-no! That’s fine. Trust me, I’m used to it. Being a superhero is great.”

“But you shouldn’t be used to it. That’s the problem.” She sighed sadly. “I’m sorry I added to your workload. I understand getting swamped with work thanks to the miraculous.”

Aspik wanted to scream. Why did he feel like he needed to respond to her playful teasing about the rings around his eyes with the truth? Wouldn’t it have been fine if he had just said something sweet like ‘I was up all night thinking about you’?

But no, he didn’t do that. Instead he brought up his busy schedule, his not-great home life, and his absent father. Which all brought the mood down. Where once she had been laughing and joking with him, now her eyes only held pity for him. It wasn’t exactly a good place for a first date to be.

At least, he thought so. He’d never been on a real date before so this was all new territory to him. Still, he was pretty sure that he wanted his date to be one solid mass of fun and joy and happiness, untarnished by even a single moment of bad feelings. As much as he didn’t want to, he needed to reset if this was going to be the perfect date that he knew Ladybug deserved.

------------

As he explored so many avenues of conversation with Ladybug, Aspik felt like he was in one of his dating sims again. And not just the weird one that was made of like six different versions of himself, from civilian form to his hero personas.

The analogy helped him get through attempt after attempt. After all, the golden ending for all those dating sims required a ton of work. And for Ladybug? He was willing to put in all the work that he possibly could to pull it off.

It would help if he didn’t spill juice on his date.

Aspik hovered over her, holding a towel but unable to move at all since actually helping her would require patting down her lap with the towel. Which felt like something out of a much less innocent dating sim.

Thankfully after a couple moments, Ladybug cut the Gordian Knot by taking the towel from him. He slinked back to his seat and set his head on the table in shame. He groaned frustratedly.

“Aspik, it’s not that bad…” Ladybug chuckled, a little nervously. “I mean you should see me out of the suit. I’m a clumsy mess.”

Aspik shook his head. Ladybug was very sweet, telling blatant lies like that to make him feel better, but it was clear that this was another failed timeline. Time for attempt number… well, he wasn’t completely sure any more.

-----------------

Finally!

No spilling, no bad taste jokes, no accidentally bringing down the mood.

Just her and him, having fun, talking and joking. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but honestly he didn’t even care anymore. The fact that they were even heroes had left his head and all that really mattered was that she was an amazing girl and he was lucky enough to be spending the evening chatting with her.

As they stood up, about to part ways for the evening, Aspik took her gently by the hand.

“Thanks for going out with me.” He chuckled as he glanced around the rooftop. “Literally!”

She giggled. “N-no problem. I had a great time.”

He rubbed the back of his neck and looked down bashfully. “So what would you say to…” He glanced up at her with a nervous smile. “...another date?”

She blinked in surprise. “Oh! I, um-”

“Before you answer!” He held up both hands. “I just want to say that I really enjoyed our time together tonight. You’re just… amazing. You’re kind and sweet and smart. Not to mention beautiful! I mean… wow.” All the breath left him at once as he looked at her. “I just really… I like you. A lot.”

A blush spread across her face. “That’s- I-”

Her mouth opened and closed a few times, but no words came out. It started to worry Aspik, who shifted from one foot to the other, suddenly second guessing everything he had just said. Had he come on too strong? This was only the first date after all. He had only barely managed to refrain from mentioning their eventual marriage and getting a cat and hamster.

Reflexively, his hand went to the bracelet and he pulled back the slider…

...only for nothing to happen.

He glanced down at the bracelet in surprise and realized that his window of Second Chance had closed. Like it or not, this was the timeline he was stuck in.

“Wait a minute.” His attention was drawn back to Ladybug, who was looking suspiciously between him and his bracelet. “Have you been using your powers on this date?”

“Um…” Without a safety net, Aspik’s nervousness shot through the roof. He defaulted to the truth and squeaked out, “Yes?”

Ladybug put a hand to her face and for a moment he was worried she was going to be upset with him. But then, when she lowered her hand, he realized she was smiling.

“I should’ve guessed that might happen.” Ladybug shook her head and rolled her eyes playfully.

“So you aren’t… mad?”

“No, it's honestly endearing. I’m flattered you tried so hard, but don’t do it again, okay? I like our dates, flaws and all. Speaking of.” She narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms. “How many tries did you go through?”

“Um…” Aspik did some quick math in his head. “...Twenty three? I think?”

“Well,” she said, moving her hands to her hips. “It looks like you’ve robbed me of around twenty three dates then. Which means you owe me that many more. Sound like a deal?”

He blinked in surprise before grinning. “As you wish, my lady.”

[gabriel-agreste-has-no-rights]

Rating: G

Summary: Luka's replaced his broken guitar with a kazoo. Marinette realizes just how important that guitar was to their burgeoning relationship....Maybe she should've made sure no one was around before she ranted about that to Tikki.(Set during/after the end of Miracle Queen)

Word Count: 2569 | Chapter 1/2

Notes: No Luka bashing is intended with this fic, but it is lovesquare endgame Disclaimer: I love kazoos and if someone tried to woo me with a kazoo I would probably swoon. Rip to Marinette but I’m different Disclaimer 2: I didn't come up with the idea for kazooka, @bugaboo-n-bananoir did in this post ). sorry for all the shoutouts lately bud lol you're just an inspiration Special thanks to @botherkupo for betareading!

XXX

“Are you okay?”  Luka asked when Marinette returned from getting ice cream.

It took some effort to pry her gaze away from where Adrien and Kagami were sharing at the other end of the ledge, but she promised herself she wouldn’t be jealous.  

...Or at least, she wouldn’t show it this time.  Both of them were her friends, and they deserved to be happy with each other.  

Did that mean she was okay?  No, not really.  But she didn’t really want to get into that, especially since Luka had already seen her so vulnerable last time.

“So, uh… where’s your guitar?”  she asked instead.

“Oh.”  Luka blinked, as if surprised his instrument wasn’t there either.  “Remember the last time I saw you?  When you were… crying in the street?”

She’d really been hoping he forgot about that.  It definitely wasn’t her most awkward moment, but Adrien at least tended to ignore the worst of hers.  He hadn’t even breathed a word about the whole constipation incident.

But comparing Luka and Adrien wasn’t fair to either of them.  

She shook her head.  “Um, what about it?”

“I dropped my bike when I went to hug you.  My guitar fell out of the basket and… yeah.”  He moved his hands as if to strum a chord, only to slump when they just stroked the air.

“Oh, Luka, I’m so sorry.”  She winced.  She knew his guitar was basically an extension of himself; she hadn’t intended for him to sacrifice it for her.  Was she really that important to him?

“It’s alright.  I’ve almost saved up for a new one.”  He shrugged.

She couldn’t tell if he was actually alright or if he was just faking.  “Well, I’m still sorry.”

“It really is alright.  You’re the music that’s been playing for me since we met, anyway.”

She blushed and looked away.  Luka had always been more forward, but she really didn’t know how she felt about his love confessions, especially considering…

No, she wasn’t going to glance back towards Adrien.  (Not that she could do that subtly, with all their classmates packed between them.)

But the point was, she couldn’t return Luka’s confession while her heart still hung somewhere in the balance.  She could try to move on—she should try to move on—but no matter what Luka said, she didn’t want him to feel stuck as a second choice.

“Well, um… thanks, I guess.” 

She took a bite of her raspberry ice cream to fill the awkward silence.  Normally his guitar did that.  Ivan’s hand drum sort of helped, but it was too far away (and too sporadic) for her to pretend she was focused on his music.

“I guess you can’t play that song for me now,” she added when he didn’t speak up.  It was too bad, because she thought she might actually want to hear it, if only to give them something to connect over.

Had she really listened to his music that often?  It was painfully obvious now that his guitar was absent.

“Were you ready to hear it?”  Hhe asked.  “I still can, if you’d like.”

Her head tilted, her eyebrows scrunching together.  “But you don’t have your guitar.  Unless you’re going to borrow Ivan’s drum.”

He chuckled a little at that.  “I’ve got something else.”

His hand reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out…

“Is that a kazoo?”  

Was this a joke?  Was he playing a joke on her?  He’d never shown that much of a sense of humor before.  If Juleka hadn’t been in the middle of the group sharing ice cream with Rose, Marinette would’ve flagged her down for help.

“Yep.  Juleka got it for me as a replacement present, you know, until I can pay for my new guitar.”

“Oh.”  She forced a grin.  “That’s… sweet of her.”

So no help from Juleka then.  Maybe this wasn’t such a big deal.  Maybe Luka would be an amazing kazoo player, and sweep her off her feet with his buzzing melody and help her forget all about Adrien and— 

Yeah, even her normally-vivid daydream couldn’t paint that picture.

“It really is.  She’s the best.”  He smiled.  She hadn’t heard him talk about Juleka often, honestly.  It was a little weird to remember that he was her friend’s older brother, but Juleka hadn’t seemed to mind Luka showing an interest in her.  

Well, unless the kazoo was more of a warning than a present.  But that was branching into conspiracy theory territory.

“Are you going to play it, then?”  she asked before she could lose her nerve.  Maybe hearing the melody, even if just on the kazoo, would give her the answers her heart was looking for.

“Right.”  He nodded and raised the blue piece of plastic to his lips.

She didn’t wince at the first high-pitched buzz.  She might have just… cringed a little.  Kazoos weren’t really meant to be played at close distance—at least that’s what she assumed, because could anyone really want to unironically listen to that?

The melody was… hard to pick out with all the screeching.  She tried to smile through it—he’d written this for her, and it wasn’t really meant to be played on the kazoo—but then Marc and Nathaniel looked up in shock-slash-horror, and Mylene just about fumbled her ice cream into the river, and Juleka let out an uncharacteristically loud cackle.

Luka’s playing petered out with a sad doot doot.  He still looked up at her expectantly.

And because he was staring at her, of course the rest of their group did too.  Including Adrien, the green mint of his ice cream still staining his lower lip.

“Um… that was…” Marinette’s face burned as she sprung to her feet.  “W-well!  Look at that I have to go—buy a birthday present for my grandpa’s mouse!”  Wait, had she used that one before?  It didn’t matter, her legs were already wooshing her away, leaving only the cherry from the top of her ice cream behind.

She hurriedly shoved the rest of her ice cream into her mouth to cool her burning face.  That was… probably an overreaction.  Luka had just tried to play her a song.  It wasn’t her that everyone else was laughing at.

A horrible feeling settled in the pit of her stomach, and she was pretty sure it wasn’t just the odd mix of raspberry and cotton candy ice cream.  She should’ve stayed to cheer him up, right?  

“Tikki, what’s wrong with me?”  She groaned, dropping her forehead against the side of the alley.  “Why did I run away like that?  I probably made Luka hate me!”

The kwami flew out from her purse.  “I don’t think he can hate you, Marinette.  He still liked you even when he knew you were in love with Adrien.”

“For some reason.”  She sighed.

“Do you want him to like you?”  Tikki prodded gently.

“I don’t… I don’t know.”  She bonked her head against the wall again. Ow.  “He likes me, and he’s nice, and we… have absolutely nothing in common.”

There.  She admitted it.  They both liked Jagged Stone, but lots of people liked Jagged Stone.

(Adrien liked Jagged Stone.  He’d asked for her autograph, and she’d just about melted.)

What she felt with Luka was nothing like that.  It was nervous usually, until he started playing his guitar.  The chords, if simple, were still soothing.

“Did I just think he made me comfortable because he played the guitar?  Am I really that shallow?”

“Of course you aren’t.”  Tikki rubbed her cheek to hers.  “A boy liked you, and it sounds like you liked him at least a little bit.  Even if it was mostly because he played guitar.”

Marinette groaned.

“But now he plays the kazoo and I don’t want to hear his song!  And I really can’t think of anything else we have to talk about.  And I won’t go on dates with him and move on from Adrien and I’ll end up old and alone with a tarantula instead of a hamster and—”

“Marinette, you know that’s not going to happen.”  Tikki patted her face again.  “There are plenty of other boys besides Adrien and Luka.  And you don’t have to move on with a boy.  You have plenty of time to just be you.  Maybe that’s for the best, with you being the guardian now.”

“Don’t remind me.”  She squeezed her eyes shut.  She wished she had someone to rely on as the guardian.  Luka had been there that one time when she couldn’t take it anymore, but she couldn’t actually tell him anything.  If only she could talk to…

“Chat Noir,” she whispered, eyes going wide.

“What?”  

She paced back and forth across the width of the alley.  “I want to talk to Chat.  I can do that now, can’t I?  I’m the guardian.  No, but Master Fu did what he did for a reason.  I can’t go sharing important secrets.  But if Fu did tell us more maybe we could’ve protected him better.”

“Um, Marinette—” 

“Either way he’s gone and I don’t know what to do, Tikki!  He didn’t finish teaching me everything and here I am worried because of a boy playing the kazoo!”

She spun, breaths coming too quickly, hoping to hear Tikki’s words of wisdom to help her calm down.

Instead, she came face to face with Adrien.  Adrien, whose eyes were practically bugging out of his head.  A cute smear of ice cream still clung to his parted lips.  That was easier to focus on than the fact that he’d almost certainly heard every word she said to Tikki.

His mouth opened and closed again.  “Uh.”

“Oh no.”

“You’re…!”

“No, no, of course I’m not!”  She waved her arms frantically.  Tikki’d had the sense to dive back into her purse, but the damage was already done.

“You’re Ladybug,” he breathed.  “It’s you.  Of course it’s you.”

Tears pricked her eyes.  One day into being the guardian, and she’d already let someone figure out her secret identity!  And it was Adrien, and while she thought he could keep a secret, she couldn’t ignore the incident with the beret, and if he told anyone and that awful future happened— 

“Marinette, hey, hey, it’s alright.”  He stepped towards her, too close, not close enough.  “I’m not going to tell anyone.  I swear.  I—I didn’t mean to.  I just wanted to make sure you were okay, and then I heard and I can’t unhear and—please don’t be mad.”

He looked down at her with such a distraught expression, she couldn’t imagine him ever breaking that oath.

“I’m not mad at you, Adrien.”  She bit her lip and looked down, afraid she might actually start crying if she had to see his pain any longer.  Which was ridiculous, because it was her identity that was compromised.  “You were just trying to help, and—and it’s my fault for not being careful enough.”

Her voice choked.  His arm reached towards her, hesitated, fell back to his side.  Of course he wouldn’t pull her into the hug that she craved.  He was dating Kagami now; it was surprising enough that he’d left her just to come make sure she was alright.  He really was a wonderful friend.

Maybe that was all she needed right now.

“It’s not your fault, my—Marinette.”  He swallowed.  “It could’ve happened to either of us.”

“Yes, but it’s not a big deal if someone finds out you once used the snake miraculous.  Nearly all of the other heroes were compromised yesterday, anyway.”

Her fault again.  She was back to square one, just her and Chat Noir against the world… and possibly Adrien too.  He hadn’t been revealed yesterday.  Maybe it would be worth it to give him a miraculous again?

He laughed awkwardly.  “Yeah. Of course.”

“So… yeah.”  She nodded.  “I’m just going to.  Go home now.”

Where she could cry in peace and Tikki could lecture her and she could find someone else to pass off the miracle box to because clearly she wasn’t ready, only there was no one else who could possibly do it except maybe Chat Noir, and he didn’t deserve that kind of pressure either, and— 

“Marinette, wait.”  

This time Adrien did grab her hand.  She did her best to control her flush.

“I know you didn’t want me to know, but… I’m still your friend, okay?  You can tell me anything.  Especially now, if you need someone to lean on…”

She did.  Oh, she did, and any other day she would leap headfirst into that offer.

But all she could think of now was Adrien smiling softly as he wiped ice cream from Kagami’s cheek.  It wasn’t like he couldn’t still be her friend when he was dating someone else, but she wasn’t sure her heart could take trusting him with all of her secrets except the one she’d actually wanted to tell.

She loved him.  Even now, knowing he had just become a threat to her identity, she loved him.

And it was too late to say it.

“Thank you, but I’d actually rather talk to Chat Noir right now.  I hope you’ll understand.”

He blinked and opened his mouth before shaking his head.  “Right.  Of course.  I’m glad you trust him.”

“I do.”  She looked towards the sliver of sky above the alley as hope blossomed in her.  She did trust Chat.  He would be able to help her through this, just like he’d supported her during Miracle Queen’s short reign.  “I wish he’d been the first to know my identity, but if anyone else had to… I’m glad it’s you, you know.  I lo—I trust you too.”

Really?  Now she almost said it?  He didn’t seem to notice, though.  His expression softened into a smile.

“Thank you, Marinette.  That means a lot to me.”

She smiled back, palm braced against the alley wall to make up for the weakness in her knees.

“Oh, um—is Luka alright?”  She barely remembered to ask.  It was probably the least of her worries, but it was still worth checking.  “I didn’t mean to hurt his feelings.  The whole kazoo thing was just—I was so embarrassed and I ran away without thinking.  He was just trying to be nice, and I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I didn’t like it.”

“You never seemed to have a problem telling that to Chat Noir,” he said.  Was that a hint of… jealousy she detected in his voice?  No way; she had to be imagining that.

“That’s because I know Chat Noir.  He knows I don’t return his feelings…”  she trailed off, blinking at the ground.

Chat had been the first person she wanted to talk to when she was upset.  The one who always supported her, who knew all her weaknesses and flaws and still looked at her like she’d hung the moon in the sky.  Who wouldn’t hesitate to risk everything for her, who trusted her even when she was wrong but was always, always there to make things right.  

He was the one who called her his Lady.  He was the one whose hug felt like home.  

“Marinette?”  Adrien asked.

“Oh,” she breathed.

“Oh?”

She looked up and met his eyes, and before she knew it, she was confessing to the wrong crush.

“I think I’m in love with Chat Noir.”