#but they were also canonically very nice to theon and happy to see him

[transassdemon]

I saw this dog on tiktok a few times and smh every time i am like. Imagine Ramsay's dogs are like this. Like, when they are not currently chasing you, he points at them like "look at my loyal hounds, these bloodthirsty killers", and ofc they are, but you just see a dog called Jenny who looks at you with this awkward smile.

[hell-heron]

Babe! I know it's been like....a while since you posted that director's cut meme, but since I'm only now getting to reblogging it, can I ask you to talk about No Love, No Glory, pls? :)

Sigh... I am always happy to unfortunately. Here is the unfortunate piece of writing in question!

So, this was written for you for LBD and the process for picking out the ship was pretty much "can't possibly do Throbb" performance anxiety, but I have to say now I really enjoy Tris/Theon as a ship. This all started with a lot of logistical triangulations and reading the tea leaves to figure out whether Tris could be one of the three unspecified Botley sent to the stony shore with him before deciding that fuck that, canon divergence it is.

I think it works a lot better with him having been sent there by Asha bc now there's this sort of parallel between Theon's relationship with Robb, and the fact he's kinda ambiguous if Asha sent Tris to Winterfell as a loyal reliable guy she trusts to save her brother, or just to get rid of the pining nuisance. But at the same time Tris is not perturbed by the power dynamics and accepts them and that's super infuriating to Theon. They have this dynamic of childhood-friends-but-not-all-that-close to bickering to lovers which is hellish to him because Tris is sort of a reminder of his life on the Islands as a child that it's just been made clear to him he can't go back to. And there's also an element of it being infuriating that he's... kind of a foil to what he remembers and sees of the Islands, since he remembers him as a nice boy and Good Big Brother from a more functional and openminded family (not that most ironborn families aren't, compared to the Greyjoys) and now he's still loyal, nice, and most outrageously he's arguably softer than Theon but doesn't get a comparable shunning because people are used to him. So he's kind of a reminder of how things could have gone differently but also of how he could have done things differently, and on the top of everything he's hot and calls him "prince Theon" without needing to be forced at knifepoint and it's a very intoxicating combination lol.

Regarding the Botley family headcanons I always felt that Sargon and Lucimore were salt sons or it would feel weird to emphasize that they're Sawane's half-brothers when they're all barely mentioned characters. Likely old Maron Botley is as well since neither he nor none of his grown kids have their own ship - this paired with Tris having 5 siblings makes me think the Botleys are just a really horny family, which is definitely helpful here lol. I hate to think people would be assholes to Wex but the fact they didn't bother to teach him to read and write makes it likely, and I like the idea of Tris being very fond of his little bastard cousin. Tris' mom being a Farwynd is functional to the fact I think the existence of Ironborn wargs is cool as hell, I also later considered she might be a mainland bride from Quellon's scheming era given that many of the kids have Riverlands names, but my alternative route of making her a Frey for comedy didn't work out bc the family tree is so well documented so it just wasn't worth it.

The title comes from Happy ending by Mika because I breathe and drink cringe

[angel-deux-writes]

Now that Honor Compels Me is finally done, I wanted to do a round-up of all the things I remember that made me say “I feel like I need to tell someone what almost happened here” or “I should probably explain this later lol”, along with my reasons for cutting the last few chapters/what would have happened in them. It’s prob going to be very long, which I apologize for, but I’ll bold the headings so that you can skip to the parts you’re interested in!

I’ll reblog it and add more as I think of them, but for now: 

Dark Dany: VERY originally, like way back in the OG plotline from 2017, Dany was an antagonist, and Margaery Tyrell was Robb’s queen. Dany would have died fighting Cersei in Kings Landing, with the same result (Cersei was ALWAYS going to go out by wildfire lmao). I changed it both because a) it seemed like too many Conveniently Alive people for one story and b) after the shitty ending Dany got, I decided I would try my hand at writing a Dany I could actually root for! For years I’ve been a big proponent/fan of the idea that Dany is eventually going to be an antagonist in the books, but the way it was handled in the show was so irredeemably stupid (gassing her up and gaslighting/scolding her fans later who didn’t see it coming, making her switch at the drop of a hat for the majority of the general audience just for the sake of a twist, etc). I ended up really loving the version of Dany I created. I tried not to soften her TOO much, which is why I had her wrestle with herself even up to the very end (like thinking “I won” after the explosion in Kings Landing and hating herself for it). I didn’t want all the flaws that make me not support canon Dany to disappear just because I started to like her! I do think that writing this story made me like Dany more overall. I still don’t support her canon actions, and I also probably won’t in the books, but I came to find her more compelling as I wrote her. I’m a lot less afraid to write her now than I have been in the past, though I’ll continue to add warnings to all my stories that feature Dark Dany, bc yall Dany stans have been through enough. 

More Death: At various points Dany, Theon, Bran, and Arya were going to die. 

Dany was already pointed out. 

I had Theon die in the Long Night in the plot outline just out of laziness/in keeping with canon, until I remembered that Redemption = Death is stupid and I wasn’t gonna do it. 

Bran was going to die after warging into Drogon and being caught in the explosion of the Red Keep. That actually stayed in until a few weeks ago! I told a bunch of people that Bran was going to die! It was the plan all along! And then I realized that “somebody has to die” was a shitty way of looking at it, and I changed it. I think a lot of this process of changing things was me trying to write what I thought people wanted vs what story I actually wanted to tell. Sure it’s a little fairy tale ending this way, but it’s my story, and who cares? Happy endings are nice. Fuck off. 

Arya...I probably wouldn’t have ever actually gone through with it, because I am a coward, but there was an idea of a VERY heavy-handed “revenge is bad” message with Arya where Arya was much more savage and instead of turning back into Arya, she was turning farther and farther away from her. She couldn’t reconcile with the Lannisters, she rejected her bonds with her family. In the end she would be unable to let go of her list, would refuse to grow and change and realize that she had other things to live for, and she would have set off one of Qyburn’s traps in the Red Keep, igniting the whole thing, killing Drogon and Rhaegal (and Bran) and leading to the deaths of thousands. AGAIN I was like “that’s too dark” and scrapped the idea, but it was definitely toyed with. I love Arya as a character, so this plotline for her would have definitely been more a reaction to fans of her who seem to want her to hold on to that vengeful seed inside of her. 

Prophecies: Listen, I do not give a fuck about any prophecies. I really don’t. Every fantasy universe has some kind of involved backstory that some fans love to get mired in, but I am not one of those fans. Still, I tried to deliver on two of them lmao. 

Azor Ahai ended up being Jaime, with Ice/Oathkeeper and Maiden’s Heart being Lightbringer. Originally, I had Brienne killing the Night King, without any thought to the prophecy at all, but that was another case of “people will like it if Brienne kills the Night King” and I realized that I would like it better if it was Jaime. I’m not sure how it checks out literally, but I figured it worked with a) tempering in water = splitting Ice. b) heart of a lion = Jaime’s change of heart after the Highgarden Battle. c) Nissa Nissa = Brienne’s “maiden’s heart” breaking during the Highgarden Battle. It was Brienne who did the stabbing, but it was Jaime who made it happen, so I figured that made sense. I made sure to mention Brienne’s tears and all the smoke when Jaime was wounded, so he could be “reborn amidst salt and smoke” or whatever, and I had Bran mention a rebirth for him in the next chapter. Which was maybe a little on the nose, but IDK GUYS I FEEL LIKE IT CHECKS OUT! 

I know the show never dove into the Valonqar prophecy at all, and I think we all know that I absolutely HATE the idea of Jaime being the Valonqar, so I would rather not think about it AT ALL. But Bran AND Rhaegal were both kind of responsible for Cersei’s death in the end, so take your pick of which Little Brother actually did the deed! 

Deleted Chapters: I promise you, you are not missing anything with these deleted chapters. They were always messy, and no matter how many times I edited them, they felt too forced and “now let me explain the ending”. 

Sansa: Sansa’s chapter followed Jaime’s and was primarily about her going to Robb and Dany and the three of them talking about the future of Westeros. The Dany/Robb conversation about it was originally absent--the last Robb chapter was added to fill in the gaps when I deleted this and the other chapters--so this would have been the first time it was discussed. It then would have had a time jump and a wedding scene, which I could never make work! It was such a jarring time jump in the middle of a chapter, and I didn’t think the wedding was particularly exciting to write about lmao. 

Tyrion: Tyrion’s chapter would have been Dany being crowned and announcing to everyone that she and her people are going to be dismantling the monarchy and setting up a new government. I think I had her give a period of a few years in which she and Robb would rule, but they were going to be transitioning governments in that time. Kind of the same idea as in What a King Should Look Like. Bronn also showed up, DID in fact get a minor holdfast, and was mocked by both Lannisters for bowing out before he could have earned himself a better one. Olenna found some bastard daughter to legitimize and continue her house.

Brienne: Brienne’s arc was a lot more drawn out in the original draft, and I ended up editing it a few times and making it shorter. VERY originally, this chapter would have been her wedding with Jaime, at which she has the “wow he actually loves me, huh?” realization. Which I thought was funny as I plotted it out, but in execution it wasn’t as good as I wanted it to be, so I moved the realization to an earlier chapter. The original was also going to be Jaime giving up his name entirely, and Brienne cloaking him, but as we have discussed before, I am in fact a coward, so I just deleted the whole chapter lmao. In all seriousness, at this point the endings just felt like Return of the King, and Into the West was actually the chosen song for this chapter, because I knew even as I was writing it that I was doing Too Much lmao. 

Robb: Robb’s last chapter was essentially just a total wrap up chapter. Just Robb and Dany being sappy, Robb being happy he was still alive, and the two of them planning the future. They were at Riverrun for this part, i’m pretty sure, or it might have been Dragonstone? I had trouble even filling this chapter with enough words for it to be a full chapter, because it was basically just an epilogue. As the story progressed, this chapter felt more and more like I was just performing to the “Robb’s Alive” crowd, which I didn’t particularly want to do, because Robb being alive was always a feature, not the focus, of this story. 

That’s all the stuff I can think of for now! If anyone has any particular questions you can message me or inbox me about them and I’d be happy to talk about it! 

[goldenreign]

@wratheart​ / @godbanes​ said: cleoquin for the ship meme

Who’s more dominant: I feel like they switch, but also Tarquin

Who’s the cuddler: Tarquin 🥺

Who’s the big spoon/little spoon: Cleo is usually the big spoon because wings get in the way of being the little spoon, but also because she likes to hold Tarquin

What’s their favorite non-sexual activity: Sailing, or just any quality time they get to spend together

Who uses all the hot water: Definitely Cleo

Most trivial thing they fight over: Which romance novel is best && which couple is best in the novel/the tv shows they watch

Who does most of the cleaning: They both leave things around until it’s to the point where it obviously needs to be done and then they finally force themselves to do it

What has a season pass on their dvr/Who controls the netflix queue: They’re both hopeless romantics, so they do love some Vampire Diaries and Grey’s Anatomy

Who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working: I genuinely love that neither of them would be okay with it being cold in the house so it would become their number one priority. Although I could see Cleo calling first because Tarquin might just use it as an excuse to get more cuddles than usual and even though she’s happy to oblige, she’d still want the heat working

Who leaves their stuff around: I can see them both doing this, getting more distracted by being together, working, etc.

Who remembers to buy the milk: Whoever opens the milk to find it expired first

Who remembers anniversaries: They both do

Who cooks normally: They get takeout a lot, but when they do cook it’s usually together. Or one of them might make the other dinner as a nice surprise.

How often do they fight: Not very often, so when they do it’s serious

What do they do when they’re away from each other: Write each other love letters. Cleo will even write poems. 

Nicknames for each other: My love / my peace / my light / my happiness / my joy. The sappier, the better.

Who is more likely to pay for dinner: They trade

Who steals the covers at night: Probably Cleo

What would they get each other for gifts: Experiences / trips that they can go on together. Instead of something tangible or a trinket, they might get tickets to go see a show together or will take time off working to just go do something together

Who kissed who first: Cleo kissed Tarquin first because he respected her need to grieve the loss of her family and Theon before being ready for their relationship and he didn’t want to push her... Eventually she gets sick of waiting.

Who made the first move: Cleo was the first to kiss him, but their relationship was always very mutual. 

Who remembers things: They both do, even when sometimes they wish they could forget; but when they’re wishing they could forget, they remind one another that they’re there for them.

Who started the relationship: They are friends to lovers, so I would say they both did

Who cusses more: Whoever happens to be angriest at any given time

What would they do if the other one was hurt: They are not going to stand idly by and let anything come between them. If it comes down to it, they will fight whoever they have to in order to stay together. If Tarquin was hurt, Cleo would not be prone to show mercy to those who hurt him, and I feel like the same is true in reverse. Cleo would heal Tarquin, of course, but that doesn’t mean she would easily let go of the outrage she would feel at him being harmed in the first place. She’s quite tempermental when provoked. 

Who is the dirty talker: Tarquin is a walking innuendo, but in a sweet way. Especially when he makes comments in public or whispers something in her ear, Cleo will blush furiously, even when she’s bantering back and forth with him.

A head canon: Specifically in their ACOTAR verse, similar to how it would be considered inappropriate to touch an Illyrian’s wings, it is considered a violation to touch a Peregyn’s wings without consent. Before under the mountain, Cleo had only ever let Emilia touch her wings when they needed tending. Occasionally feathers come loose or something might get caught in them and be quite irritating. After Emilia’s death, Cleo suffered through learning to care for her wings by herself because she didn’t trust anyone else enough to help her. A few days after accepting the mating bond with Tarquin, she got quite a bit of dirt and sand in her feathers on a visit from a particularly spontaneous coupling on the private beach. When they were dressed, Tarquin noted Cleo straining her arms to reach behind her and furiously flapping her wings in a rather hilarious display to try and shake the coarse material out, especially of the sensitive area where her wings connected to her back and the feathers are softer, more downy. After a few moments of futile effort, she finally, hesitantly, asks for his help. It’s the first time she’s allowed anyone to touch them willingly apart from Emilia, and from then on he’s the first one she’ll go to when she needs help with them.

[fedonciadale]

The last Starks - what I liked and what I didn’t like

Well, I certainly thought this episode was better than episode 3 (but that is not a very high standard).

I mean this episode had Cersei, one thing to add on the plus side. Lena is a delight and her red dress was a joy to behold in all these drab grey colours. In King’s Landing we get colour again. There is that! But still no Jon PoV. In general I fear we get Political Jon, but it will be Winterhell 2.0. We will be left in the dark forever when the Starks decided to play as a pack.

More under the cut!

I liked the funeral, it was nice to see the fallen get credit. Sansa giving a Stark pin to Theon as a last goodbye was a nice touch and Jon giving his speech made us remember why people flock to his cause. It was nice with just the right touch of pathos.

I also liked the feast, in general. People happy that they are alive, Jon finally laughing (with Tormund and actually looking at Sansa). I actually fought the Lannisters playing the drinking game with Brienne was funny (until Tyrion had to ask Brienne if she was a virgin. Damn him! How could anyone hurt Brienne!).

I really felt for Sansa, her jealousy and her dislike for Dany were obvious, but Dany was also jealous of all the comraderie and nothing left for her. Emilia really did a good job there. Dany is jealous of Sansa as well, but she is actualla a bit better at hiding it.

Gendry becoming Lords of Storm’s End. That certainly was a surprise. I wish Gendry all the best in the world, but it didn’t make any sense for me. Why would she legitimize the usurper’s bastard? I guess she wanted to show that she can be generous, and Gendry is probably no threat, because he is not cunning enough, but still.... Maybe Dany wanted to frighten Sansa, dangling a legitimization for Jon before her nose? I honestly had a problem with this. It might mean that Gendry could become a contender for the Iron Throne (but I feel that would be a red herring).

And what an episode for shippers this was! D&D must have managed to piss off every major ship in GoT in this episode (which is kind of funny). Gendry made a really nice offer of marriage and even knelt - a kneeling that was motivated by affection and in juxtapostion to Jon’s kneeling later. I knew Arya would not accept, but I still have hope for these two. Maybe when Arya has found closure she can be the super cool Lady of Storm’s End that will be the talk of generations?

So, then we had Braime and Braime sex! I liked that, it was sweet. Jaime was so obvious and so nervous and Brienne was sooo brave. She was frightenend and yet she trusted Jaime enough to actually undress. I just fear that this means that one of them will die.

Then there was Sansa and the Hound. I’ve never liked this ship, I only sort of liked the scene, because they really went there. D&D meticulously shoot down every serious or semi-serious Sansa ship there is (and I’m gloating, because I don’t like any of these ships in canon), showing her to be jealous at the same time and very obviously in love with Jon (and tortured about it). But did they really have to let the Hound say, that Sansa was “broken in”. That was so yikes and so “male writing”..... Bleh....

And than the Jon/Dany scene. Seriously, how anyone can ship these two after watching that, I cannot understand. Jon was drunk, but Dany invaded his room and personal space anyway. She told him he loves him, and like the obedient lapdog he is, he started to do his duty and kiss and undress her (while still not declaring his love), until he somehow came to his senses, remembering what stood between them. For Dany it is all about her (her claim - which is not really hers). Again like in the dragonriding scene where she taunted him to risk his life, in this love triangle she shows herself to be the toxic girlfriend. No word about his identity crisis, no declaration he does to make her feel secure ever seems to help. Not bending the knee, not anything. She pushes her own needs and wishes on him, not once stopping to ask how he feels, demanding/ordering that he doesn’t tell Arya and Sansa about RLJ. This is not love, this is greed to possess. Jon looked miserable as hell through the whole scene and it still gets worse for him.

Then they plan for the next war.... Sansa makes some valid points, but Dany just sees someone who contradicts her and comes into the way of her plans and she lashes out. Nobody backs up reasonable Sansa, showing once more that she is the only one with braincells left. Jon’s whole body language was crying submissive and he might have cut off Sansa to hasten Dany’s departure from Winterfell (and thus put Sansa out of danger), But honestly, if nobody ever talks up to Dany it is no surprise that she becomes a tyrant.... I love the murderous glare Arya shot at Dany. I also love that Sansa feels that safe in Jon’s presence that she still speaks her mind, even though a dangerous volatile queen is also there.

Then we finally have a Stark chat, with some very interesting dialogue. Jon decides to let Arya and Sansa in on the secret (after Dany ordered him not to do it!), but he left a loophole, letting Bran tell everything. He even left a loophole for Sansa and Arya because they swore to keep secret what he would tell them (only for Jon not to tell them). I don’t know if he left that loophole on purpose, but Sansa uses it.

Arya sort of showed herself to be understanding of Jon bringing Dany. I guess she could see that Jon had good intentions and wanted to soften the blow that she told him that none of his siblings wants or trusts Dany, althought I would say that Sansa’s outcry: “Arya killed the Night King” is valid as well. The dragons didn’t do shit anyway and without Dany the Wall would not have fallen. But they robbed, robbed, robbed us!  But that they cut the RLJ reveal has me convinced that they are indeed pulling a “Winterhell 2.0.” I’m not sure about Jon, but Sansa and Arya certainly planned something, maybe even Bran, although you can never say with Bran. But that cut sealed it for me. We’re going to get the Starks pulling down Dany and Cersei. I just wish they would do it in a way that would make us actually root for the Starks instead of being so secretive so that the GA will just say:

Anyway, Arya makes her way to King’s Landing on unfinished business (killing Cersei?) as does the Hound. We probably will get Cleganebowl (which I hate....). I think this is misleading, and Arya actually plans on killing Dany.....

Anyway, Sansa uses the loophole Jon left her and tells Tyrion about RLJ, after making sure that Tyrion is indeed uncomfortable with Dany. It is interesting. Tyrion really did a “the lady doeth protest too much” this episode. He is clearly not on board of the MS Dany any longer (not with his whole heart) and it made me wonder, if Tyrion actually jumping ship at the end of the episode is a hint. Sansa clearly wants Jon home at Winterfell. I don’t think she wants Jon on the throne, she just wants Dany gone (which considering that Dany threatened her life several times is legit) and Jon safe. She shrewdly realises that Jon as son of Rhaegar will never be safe. Her jelousy might tinge her comprehension somewhat but I think she came to the right conclusion. Jon is a hostage and he is in danger. I hope she actually manages to help him next episode.

Jon is still miserable as fuck as he says his goodbyes. I mean he is that much in an identity crisis, that he gives Ghost to Tormund. That is the only scene that had me really worried, because of the very old/new leaks that Jon might end in exile beyond the wall. I don’t really believe it, it cold be a red herring, but it was only one hint, while we had several Jon as king hints (which was a bit too much for me actually, it made me worried that he might actually not become king). It would make his journey rather ridiculous and Sansa’s as well, but I don’t trust anything or anybody right now.

I do think it is interesting that Sansa has had closure with all her ships and now so visibly wants Jon at her side in Winterfell. It hurts to see that. And if she ends up alone and miserable, her journey would make no sense as well.

GRRM promised us a bittersweet ending, and there is no bittersweet in all the Starks being alone and miserable at the end...

Jaime, after being very happy for about a day or so, left Brienne, but not to fight for Cersei as he insinuated, but to kill her. I am quite sure. He just didn’t want Brienne to follow him and he expects to die and doesn’t want her to mourn him. I think this is an interesting Jon and Jonsa parallel. Jaime killed a mad queen and might have to kill his lover and sister, while Jon, Jaime’s foil might have to kill a mad queen and his former lover/aunt. I still hope, there will be a twist though, that neither has to do the deed. At least Dany could be good for something and off Cersei before Jaime has to try. We also have now three persons on the way to King’s Landing on an assasination mission. To me that screams “plot twist”.

Anyway, the rest of the episode was rather forseeable... Dany’s tired troops ran into Euron’s trap - honestly how could he pull the same trick twice? . Rhaegal dies (one more dragon down, could have died more meaningful last episode, but I’m not invested anyway), but o.k..... Varys and Tyrion talk Dany out of attacking King’s Landing straigt off - they remind her that killing thousands of innocent and burning cities to the ground is not a good look again - , but it all goes to hell when Cersei kills Missandei - which we’ll see next episode.

Well, I have severals and severe issues with this. 1) What is Cersei’s agenda? Provoking Dany to burn down the Red Keep with all the innocent lives so that she will look better? Does she hope she’ll take the dragon out of the sky with her armada of ballistas? 2) Dany was already pissed because of Rhaegal. There was no need to kill Missandei of! She just wanted a quiet life with GW for fuck’s sake 3) I really was uncomfortable that her last words were not for GW whom she loves, but for Dany, her ‘mistress’. Yikes. 4) The negotiations were superfluous as fuck. I could have told them beforehand that negotiations where both sides demand unconditional surrender just do not work.

Varys plots. He definitely jumped ship. And I stan him. He knows what the smallfolk wants (food!).

Also, Emilia really shines this season. She makes a very good job of portraying DarkDany.

All in all, many interesting things - and as always with D&D some very very cringeworthy things - but Jon not confiding in anyone is immensely frustrating. We are still at these ambiguous stuff.... I mean the fact that he still hasn’t said, that he loves Dany is good, but he is so trapped, that he can’t find his way out. You know, if they wanted to go for Jon€rys romance we would have it by now, but to get cut out of all the STark’s PoV (safe perhaps Sansa) is not very satisfying storytelling.

I think it is interesting that they sort of sunk all the ships in this episode. I think that does bode well for Jonsa, the juxtapositions of Gendrya and Braime with Jon€rys were very interesting, and are probably worth another post.

They are out in the open with Sansa now.  Antis are screaming that she broke her oath, but I don’t see it that way. Sansa fights for Jon, this is a good fight and I really, really hope that she’ll be successful in the game. She had some good teachers after all.

Ah, and that Sansa told Jaime, that she regrets that she won’t see Cersei’s execution led me to believe that she will see it after all.

So, just my thoughts. I still think the trajectory of the story goes where we predicted it to go. It’s just no very well done. And Winterhell 2.0. raised its ugly head....

[winterisfinallyhere]

Game of Thrones 8x02 review

So second re-watch and a little bit of calming down I have slightly better feels for the episode. 

We got some really amazing Bramie moments, Gendry is officially canon!, Dany in a sort of weird way confirmed Political Jon for us and the whole episode kind of showcased everyone connecting with people, with their family. Well everyone but Dany. The Theon + Sansa reunion was super sweet and while I did a momentary freak-out that dxd were going to go for that, I really don’t see why on the second watch. Sansa and Theon are war buddies of sort. Of course they’re gonna be happy to see each other. 

And as it turned out the title was not The Rightful Queen but A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms - which I love! 

That’s actually what I’m going to talk about first this time around! All the things I loved best. Because I feel what I actually enjoyed got kind of lost in my initial thoughts share because I just got so super frustrated by the last-ish scene with DanyxJon.

So the Amazing bits!

First was, of course, the whole Jamie x Brienne interaction from the first one when she defends him in the great hall, him watching her instead of listening to Tyrion and then him asking to fight with her. Then when he knights her. It’s really the best and it’s super amazing and heartbreaking at the same time.

It’s so beautiful and almost better than a freaking wedding and just the more of my babies I see, the more I want them! GIMME GIMME! Seriously, please, let this have a Disney HEA ending! I want Saphire lion cubs running around on Tarth.

Even with these happy dreams in my heart, I got the terrible feeling that Brienne is going to die. No one gets to be truly happy in GoT without paying a price. Then again, usually that happiness comes at the expense of someone else, which this do not. So a bit of hope there...

The Sansa + Dany  (+ Theon) scene

Ohh goodness, this was hands down my favorite none Bramie scene. 

Dany x Sansa chat one-on-one was something on my special wishlist I kind of didn’t even think we’d get. But here we did! And boy was it amaze balls! Dany gets straight to the point with the fact that it’s Jon is a big part of why they’re not BFFs (which they could never be, but moving on) and Sansa twists that around so Dany actually kind of point out it’s her that’s change and done for Jon, not the other way around. Which totally changes Sansa’s tune and we even get a sort of apology. 

Then she asks the big question

 and we see Dany’s reaction (not good) 

(also that D’s had time to paint her nails. very nice.)

Then we get this scene

Theon comes in, knees for Dany, tells them why he’s there and then asks to fight for Sansa. Because he’s here for her, for the Starks, not for Dany.

And it shows on D’s face that she’s not pleased. Not only that, but she’s a little bit jealous and also confused. Because of this history, this bond, is something she totally lacks. She has no connections, no true family. She has followers for sure. She has Jorah who has been with her for so long. But even he has always been her subject. Sansa and Theon love each other as equals because of their shared past and trauma. And he wants to fight for her and the Starks because of that. Because of love and family. That is what Dany lacks. Always have. It’s really very sad when you think about it.

Now on to the Dislike(s)

If any of you caught my first thoughts review, you’ll remember it was basically me bashing Jon Snow for being an idiot for telling Dany who he “really” is. Which I still stand-by. No matter if you’re indifferent to ships, a Jonsa or a Jonerys fan this sucked as a reveal.

Really! Don’t believe me?

If you’re indifferent you’ll be pissed because he just kind of tells her. No drama, no build up, no her overhearing or anything. We don’t get enough time for either one of their emotions to properly show (because we freaking keep getting interrupted every time Dany is talking to someone).

If you’re a Jonsa, this sucked because he told her at all. It’s a real stupid move even if there is another motive. It also sucked because he’s telling Dany rather than Sansa.

If your heart beats for Jon x Dany, this sucked as reveal because this was not the time! They’re about to possibly die. All over people have been telling their loved one that they should go and be safe in the crypt (even though why they think the crypts full of old dead people would be safe, I do not know). But there is none of that. Instead, we get a reveal D & J are related and the first thing she does is suggest it’s not true and then point out he’s the last male heir and got a claim to the iron throne.

I think the only people that liked this is the anti-Jonery and anti-Jonsa folks who also don’t care about Jon being in character. Or anything making sense. So no one?

Basically, this scene sucked and makes very little sense.

Unless you’re going for Max Drama. Which I guess dxd are doing. So I’m just going to go with it and see where it takes us. It’s pretty clear Dany and Jon are worried about different things and it’s going to be interesting to see it play out. I’m assuming it’s all leading us towards Targbowl / Dance of Dragons 0.2 and as long as that happens, I guess I can forgive the weirdness of this actually going down.

Overall...

this episode flowed better than the last one. It was still a little bit too much of “reunions, talking and being broody while waiting for the army of the dead to show up”. Seriously not sure we needed two episodes of that but just like with the Jon + Dany crypt scene I’m gonna try to just trust that dxd put them in there for a freaking reason.

My wish for next weeks episode is that they just get rid of the Night King fast. I don’t want 1 h 20 minutes of battle. I want them to just kill him, all the wights fall down and die (again?) and it’s like “wow, that was easier than expected” and for like two minutes it's all smiling until the real politics of WTF happens now start. Especially with Dany knowing who Jon really is!

That’s really all I care about, not the stupid WW war.

At this point, I don’t even care what they want. I just want them gone so we can get on with actual interesting plotlines. Like who sits on the iron throne, how do we feed everyone, how do we get Cersei her elephants, how do we deal with the dragons, northern independence and who is telling Sam his family was roasted alive Those questions are the questions I actually want answers to.

[raviposting]

All of the Starklings

Oh man okay lol

Robb: 

How I feel about this character Honestly my answer for every Starkling is that I love them sm haha. Robb was actually my favorite Starkling after Sansa doe!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character Theon (which was a SURPRISE it took the fandom + my headcanons for me to ship them), and kind of Talisa, and then I crackship him with Margaery but to be completely honest that one is just because they would look good and their ship name is Robbaery which I mean..best ship name ever. 

My non-romantic OTP for this character Him and Sansa! I feel like out of all the Starkling dynamics his and hers would have been my favorite for them both!! 

My unpopular opinion about this character Hm I’ve seen some other Sansa & Arya fans say that he didn’t really care about them because he wouldn’t trade for them when Cersei demanded it but? I think he was thinking as a ruler and realized that if he agreed to it, his sisters probably wouldn’t have been returned anyway (and that he had heard nothing about Arya and knew she wasn’t actually part of the deal even though it was said she was). Like, it sounded harsh but I think he really was trying to protect them and win. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. I WISH HE HAD LIVED AND GOT TO ARYA UGH 

Jon:

How I feel about this character He’s a dumbass emo but I love this goth

All the people I ship romantically with this character YGRITTE, Gendry (kinda), and maybe Satin and Val bc the gifsets with them are?? Really nice?? Even though I never shipped them in-book? 

My non-romantic OTP for this character HIM AND THE REST OF HIS SIBLINGS ESP SANSA & ARYA WOW but okay one that’s not family I’d say would be Tormund! I think they’re wonderful friends and I love watching them together. 

My unpopular opinion about this character Uhhhhh. I don’t hate it if he rules or anything? But also just let him rest. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. I wish he didn’t bang his aunt lmao 

Sansa:

How I feel about this character LOVE OF MY LIFE I love and relate to her so much and as I’m growing up I think now I don’t relate to her as much but I still love and am protective of her character 

All the people I ship romantically with this character Margaery (they deserved everything!!!!), Theon, and Podrick. Her and Harry could be fine too I guess 

My non-romantic OTP for this character Okay from here on out I’m going to avoid starkling dynamics lmao so uh. Her and Tyrion. They were both forced into a horrible situation but managed to have a cordial dynamic and I think that they truly care and know one another and it was just very sweet. 

My unpopular opinion about this character Ughhhh if I see one more person still blaming her for things that happened in s1 I will scream she was a child pls stop 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. Hm. My main goal for the Starklings is that they are all happy and safe so as long as that happens I’m good, but I kind of wish we got the Queen in the North with Sansa? But hey, maybe they’ll do that later idk 

Arya: 

How I feel about this character My daughter!!!! My bamf daughter!!! 

All the people I ship romantically with this character Gendry and that’s it lol. I’ve seen the crackship of her with Young Griff and I mean? Sure? Why not? But the only one I actually ship is Gendrya. 

My non-romantic OTP for this character I mean, her and Jon lmao but I said I wasn’t doing that S O  her and her whole squad tbh. Hot Pie, even Gendry, Sandor, and oh my lord but especially Jaqen. 

My unpopular opinion about this character While I very much cheered when Arya decided to go home, I would not have minded her being No One for like. A season or so. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. That we had gotten better writing for her and Sansa with them deciding to fool Baelish.

Bran: 

How I feel about this character D&D don’t know how to write him but I love my son!!!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character Jojen!

My non-romantic OTP for this character Him and Hodor :’( Also I love his dynamic with Meera 

My unpopular opinion about this character Bran’s storyline isn’t boring, D&D just don’t know how to write his character or any internalized thoughts character!!!!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. I wish we got to see his whole training instead of you know! Being cut from an entire season!!!!!!

Rickon: 

How I feel about this character SWEETIE PIE WHO DESERVES THE WORLD!!!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character Uhh no one really but I’ve seen people ship him with Shireen which I mean I can get with that so why not 

My non-romantic OTP for this character Him and Osha!!! 

My unpopular opinion about this character He deserved to have his own part of his story told!! I know it’s not bc he’s so young but still!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. oh yoU KNOW THAT HE DIDN’T GET AN ARROW IN HIS CHEST

Send me a character!

[blenderbender1811]

The Iron Queen: On Alannys Harlaw

There’s some high quality meta going around about lots of under appreciated women in ASOIAF who we just don’t know much about. Take literally anything written about Joanna Lannister ever by @joannalannister for instance. There’s not a whole lot to go on about Alannys Harlaw though. We don’t have much to go on - Theon rarely thinks about her and even Asha doesn’t talk much about her relationship with Alannys. But from what little we do know (and some good old fashioned head canon), here is my picture on what she was like and how her life turned out. Trigger warnings for discussions of physical abuse, including spousal abuse.

- She, her brother, and her sister got along but weren’t particularly close. That is to say - they enjoyed each other’s company and cared about each other, but they weren’t exactly the best of friends. Rodrik seems to spend most of his time talking about her when he wants to convince Asha not to go to the kingsmoot and Gwynesse mostly talks about her rights to Ten Towers. 

- I think @goodqueenaly is right when she suggests Alannys was married off to Balon because Quellon hoped Rodrik’s sister would be able to bring more progressive ideas into their marriage (and hopefully be on board with his reforms) (And PS - if you’re not following her, do. She ALSO writes great meta about under appreciated ladies). I also tend to think she and Balon were married rather young since during the Greyjoy Rebellion they had two sons who seemed to be grown men when they died. Westeros considers a grown man at 16 so I’m going to say Rodrik was 17 and Maron was 16. So let’s say Alannys and Balon were married at 17, the same year Balon became captain of a longship, that’s a nice milestone.

- I don’t think Quellon’s plan worked. I think Alannys was squarely in Balon’s corner in the Ironborn culture war. For both political reasons (if Balon becomes a king, she’d be a queen and their children would be princes and princesses) and personal reasons (I suspect the Old Way spoke more to the strong and proud Alannys - perhaps not as much as it did to Balon, but more than Quellon’s ideas did). I don’t see Alannys as anywhere near as bookish and interested in greenland thoughts as her brother. Quellon probably ended up sorely disappointed - as did Alannys when she realized why Quellon arranged their match. 

- From the scant descriptions we have of Alannys, we get ‘strong’, ‘proud’ and ‘fierce’ with ‘laughter in her eyes’. I think a lot of posts about Alannys focus on what she is now - a woman brokenhearted over the loss of her children, and that is fair. But there’s more to Alannys than that. This is the woman who ‘raised Asha to be bold’. I think Asha’s probably bolder than Alannys was, since Theon never thinks of her the way Asha did, but I do think she was more headstrong than the traditional Westerosi ideal lady. I see Alannys as someone who didn’t do things halfway. If she was happy, she was happy. If she was angry, she was angry. 

- Her and Balon’s relationship was tumultuous to say the very barest minimum. When things were good, they were good. I’m not sure I’d go so far as to say they were ever really in love, but I do think they were more or less on the same page and capable of enjoying each other’s company. But when things were bad, they were BAD. I imagine Balon got into quite a few furious arguments with his family (his dad, his stepmom, Euron, Aeron and Urri when they were being Aeron and Urri) and his wife was no exception. For her part, Alannys gave as good as she got - she was stubborn, fierce, and bold, you could not yell at her without her yelling back. There were days she would have killed him in his sleep and happily faced execution for it, and I do think there were days where one or the other laid hands on their spouse. So, yes, their relationship, much like a lot of Balon’s, was a big mess. I do think she cared at least a little about him when he died though - enough that she was convinced it was murder and would tell anyone who asked about it, even on days where she wasn’t as lucid. 

- I think she got along with Aeron (and probably Urrigon) and Victarion, just because I don’t see them fighting a lot (and Aeron doesn’t seem to harbour her any ill will when he tells Theon she’s at Ten Towers). She probably rolled her eyes at Aeron and Urri’s antics when they were younger and let Balon deal with it. They’re not HER little brothers making fools of herself. Euron on the other hand....I think most people could tell he was weird and off and I don’t think Alannys was an exception (though obviously nobody knew how bad he was until later, obviously, except Aeron). She probably kept her distance from him.

- As for Quellon, I don’t think she particularly hated him, but his obvious disappointment in her lack of support for his reforms probably kept them from warming up to each other. I don’t think they got along and so Alannys kept her children at a distance as well (which is why Theon and Asha never think much about their Grandfather). The person I think she REALLY disdained was his Piper wife. I can’t imagine the new Lady Greyjoy much enjoyed Pyke. It’s cold, bleak, and broke, especially compared to Pinkmaiden. I can see Alannys, a woman of relative action, growing annoyed VERY quickly. She probably kept her children away from her too and quietly (or not so quietly) was pleased when Balon ascended to his seat and his Piper stepmother fell from favour.

- I think Alannys loved all her children, but Theon was the one she was the closest too. He was her youngest, her baby boy, and he was so shy. I’m sure she was probably involved in raising her older two to be raiders, but Theon was only just learning when he was taken away and so she probably figured he’d grow out of his shyness. 

- I think Asha’s always been closer to Balon than to Alannys, and I think Alannys has always had a sort of conflict regarding her daughter. She delighted in how bold Asha was and obviously wanted to encourage her, but at the same time she also knew she was ‘supposed’ to be teaching Asha how to be a lady. I think there were definite times when Asha was being stubborn and Alannys was torn on how to react - she ‘should’ be shaking her and ordering her to act like a lady, but all she wants to do is give her daughter a hug and say ‘good girl’. I think for the most part, she ‘looked the other way’ when her daughter was off doing things she ‘shouldn’t’ and then she’s shrug and say ‘Sorry, Lord Quellon, didn’t see it, couldn’t stop her’. And then go off and laugh at whatever Asha’d done.

- Speaking of Asha, I like to think she gets her snark from her mother. I think Alannys DEFINITELY sassed anybody who gave her a hard time, especially after she became the Lady of Pyke. 

- After the Rebellion was over and her boys were gone, I think she and Balon were both broken up in different ways. I think Balon drank a lot and was particularly vicious when any chance of a raid came up (say, in the Stepstones). Meanwhile, for a long time, Alannys was just...numb. She couldn’t let herself feel anything because once those floodgates opened, EVERYTHING hit her at once. That numbness is probably when she began sleepwalking and searching for her boys. Both of them were haunted by their sons, that was for sure. I think they probably TRIED to have another baby, since Alannys was desperate for another son, but it didn’t happen. So they tried fostering and that didn’t work (and oh dear Drowned God, they were UNAMUSED when their maester caught Tristifer with Asha). 

- Sure enough, once the floodgates were open, there was no shutting them up again. Alannys was completely desolated by the loss of her three boys. She got up looking for them, forgot they died, and even began mistaking people for them (and ow, I just had a very painful mental image of her mistaking Aeron for Rodrik). I tend to see her vacillating between fury and misery before she finally had a breakdown.

- Her sister had a similar breakdown after her husband died in the rebellion, so I’m wondering if Harlaws are predisposed to break down in reaction to grief? Her sister focused on wanting her rights back, and Alannys focused on her dead children. 

- I don’t think she left until recently, when she contracted her cough. She was growing weaker, so Rodrik suggested to Balon that the more comfortable Harlaw might be better for her than Pyke, so they shipped her off. She’s been doing better - her cough comes and goes, but she’s eating more and is sleeping through the night and has days where she’s more lucid than others.

[mdwatchestv]

Game of Thrones 7x07:  Look What You Made Me Do

And just like that it's over! This truncated season of seven episodes blew by as fast as a trip from Dragonstone to Eastwatch. I'm still not really sure why this season had to BE only seven episodes, I know the show is intensely expensive, but HBO has the money and why not shell out for three more episodes of their most popular property? Now faced with the prospect of a final season not hitting our little screens until 2019, I feel like a six episode finale is just not gonna cut it. I mean are we even going to make it two more years as a society? I would be super bummed if I had to leave this physical plane without having heard the final chords of the song of ice and fire. Although if the producers want to take the time to think very hard about writing and storytelling, I would not be adverse to that. Let's be real, while this season was full of spectacle, and had plenty to enjoy, the writing was just not up to the par of previous years. Drama that felt natural and earned was shelved in order to rush forward big "show stopping" moments such as Dany and Jon's meeting, ice dragon making, and this past episode's all hands on deck summit in the dragon pit.

Fan theories spiraled wildly out of control in correspondence with the increasingly erratic storytelling on screen. Instead of trying to predict the solution to a complex puzzle-plot, we are now in a time when literally anything can happen, including (but not limited to) Lannister lieutenant Ed Sheeran. Still, were we not entertained? There were absolutely moments this season that will go into the annals of GOT greatness: Arya's Walder Frey Face Swap Massacre, Olenna Tyrell's Final Fuck Off, Loot Train Battle  Dragon Destructo-Fest 2k17 to name a few. But the season's writing on a whole often veered into what felt like fan service (or straight up fanfiction). Game of Thrones isn't the first show to do this, but it is the first show to do it that up until this point has been famous for granting essentially the opposite of fan service. Oh you love this strong, glorious, perhaps ridiculously attractive, character? It would be a shame if something were to....happen...to them. But that being said this episode felt a bit more solid than it's immediate predecessor, and while they may not have completely stuck the landing, it was more of a point deduction for some hops rather than a horrifying leg break (did anyone else see that last Olympics? There is not a day that goes by I don't think about it.)

So our merry band of zombie hunters, as well as Brienne and Pod, have all assembled at King's Landing in order to persuade Cersei into a ceasefire. How much time has passed since the zombie capture? Days, weeks? Who knows. What's important is all of our favorites have assembled in a veritable class reunion. Pod is happy to see his old boss Tyrion still in one piece, Bronn is reunited with Pod, and Brienne and The Hound are downright chummy despite Brienne being under the impression she had murdered him during their previous encounter. Time really does heal all. But how much time? That's the true question. For once Jon is not the most popular princess at the party, he didn't fight in the Battle of the Blackwater, and he didn't co-parent a murderous pre-teen. Our group is escorted to the not-at-all-a-trap Dragon Pits where they await Cersei. Bronn and Pod peace out immediately because Bronn don't give a shit and also can't contractually be in the same room as Lena Headey. Ain't love grand.

Cersei is rolling deep (her crew includes Euron thank god), but her entrance is promptly upstaged by Dany flying in on Drogon. Before anything can happen, Euron interrupts the proceedings to call out Theon for, essentially, being a little bitch. It is glorious. Anyway the zombie is produced and runs right at Cersei, where exactly none of the people sworn to protect her do a single goddamn thing. Euron weighs the threat of millions of the undead versus the safety of his little island and peaces HARD. I absolutely loved this reaction and wish it had been genuine. Is Euron my favorite character? Unclear, but strong maybe.  Cersei says she will stand down if Jon promises to stay neutral. Jon I Can-Not-Tell-A-Lie Snow/Targaryen of course blabs that he already bent the knee to Dany. No one is impressed by this. Not only is Jon the least popular, he is now also the least liked.

Brienne cements my theory she only made the trip to tje Landing o'Kings to act as Jaime's moral compass, and pleads with him that loyalty to houses is dumb in the face of the current threat. She's not wrong. Later on Cersei will call Jaime the stupidest Lannister, but surely it is Tyrion who proceeds to fall hook, line, and sinker for her hand-on-stomach motivated-by-concern-for-my-baby-change-of-heart routine. Did anyone truly think that Cersei would just...join up with the good guys? That is a "what if" fanfiction summary too ridiculous for even this season of the show to pursue. Cersei is the woman who blew up half her own damn city, she does not have time for Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen. Why risk her throne when the zombies will kill these silly children for her? Why risk anything when the Iron Bank subplot has resulted in a whole mercenary army in Essos? Actually speaking of Essos...why doesn't everybody just move over there? Why not just let the Night King HAVE Westeros if he wants it so bad. Like they said, the zombies can't swim and Essos doesn't seem to be physically connected to Westeros in any way. Look I'm just saying.

Back at Dragonstone, it's revealed that Theon actually was impressed by Jon's foolhardy declaration of loyalty. Theon's subplot this season has been understated, but honestly one of my favorites. While he hasn't had the flashiest part in recent seasons Alfie Allen has turned in a consistently subtle and poignant performance in this role. Over the course of the show Theon's journey has been about belonging and finding his worth. This was at times less than subtly symbolized by first his castration (literal/figurative/symbolic/etc) at the hands of Ramsay, and then even less subtly by his reclamation of said "manhood' this episode. But that aside his new side quest to rescue Yara is pleasingly cyclical as he stakes his loyalty to the one person who ever willingly and proudly claimed him as family. Also now that presumably Yara is tied to Euron, who is pivotal to claiming Cersei's mercenary army.... I'm just saying maybe Theon will be able to play the part of hero in the end after all.

Speaking of families coming back together, all is well in Westeros as the Stark Sestras team up to take down Lord Baelish once and for all. Look I am always happy when storylines end in positive female friendship, but I still can't help feeling frustrated with the way this was played out. It is unclear how much time is passing for any of the characters in the show, but at what point did Arya and Sansa realize they were being played? Were any of their public confrontations for show? Surely there would be no point to their private arguments, so at least some of their discord had to have been real. How much, if it at all, were they able to set up Littlefinger in return? Or did they just arrive at their conclusion moments before the mock trial? I admit as an audience member I was fooled, not by clever storytelling, but by total misdirection that robbed us of the satisfaction of seeing these two bright young women begin to think for themselves. Like so many scenes written this season this was another example of a satisfying punchline delivered at the cost of a seemingly reverse-engineered build up.

And as much as I have enjoyed Aidan Gillen's scheming, it was rewarding to see him dispatched at the hands of the women who he spent most of the series attempting to manipulate. Despite his claims otherwise, the only person Littlefinger has ever truly cared about is Littlefinger. Even though the path there was rocky, I look forward to Sansa and Arya's newfound alliance. Arya recognizing what Sansa has been through, and Sansa in turn telling Arya she was the strongest person she knew was a beautiful scene. Both girls have been wearing their hair in styles reminiscent of their parents, and seeing them take on the leadership roles of the previous Lord and Lady of Winterfell was a nice touch.

But not all the show's siblings are getting on, and after threatening Tyrion with death, Cersei is on a roll. Jaime is, for some reason, surprised that instead of keeping her word Cersei has no actual intention of zombie fighting. Jaime has had quite the arc this season, one that has driven him away (perhaps forever) from his twin, lover, and baby mama. As I wrote about previously, Jaime is the archetypal white knight. He is one of the few characters not motivated by greed or self-promotion, but rather a warped familial love.. While he has acted cruelly and cowardly in the past, he is not characteristically cruel or a coward. This season he has witnessed true horror in the form of fiery dragon death, the vengeful Olenna Tyrell, and the true depth of Cersei's darkness. He seems to finally realize that what he perceived as righteous action motivated by true love may have been in service to the wrong side. A Jaime Lannister unmoored from his familial duty is as compelling a wildcard as any, and it will be interesting to watch his journey continue to unfold hopefully in a Northerly direction.

Well, we've come to it. There's nothing left to talk about. Sam and Gilly arrive back at Winterfell just in time for Sam to have an exposition-off with the Three Eyed Arse-Face. Sam proceeds to take credit for Gilly's breaking news, and together with Bran's "vision power" the two explicitly spell out the true nature of Jon's identity. None of their revelations are a surprise to viewers of the show, beyond chiseling 'Aegon Taragaryen" into canon. No, the bigger surprise was that this narration was the voice over to Jon and Dany getting it on on her pleasure yacht. While we heard definitive proof that Dany is in fact Jon's Aunt, we watched their supple bootied bodies writhe around together. What emotion was I supposed to be feeling during this scene? I am honestly asking. Because the emotion I was feeling was void. The absence of feeling. "Jon needs to know." Yeah ya think Bran? With all that you can see you couldn't see that you should have told him this vital, life-altering information just a little bit earlier? Send a goddamn raven since they travel at the speed of light. Jesus Seven Hells Christ.

Also there were many happy romantic flashbacks of Rhaegar marrying Lyanna, but it's super fucked up that Rhaegar ditched his first wife and children to have a SECOND child name Aegon. Like what the fuck is that Rhaegar?? Granted the first Aegon (along with his sister and mother) were horribly murdered by the Mountain, so I guess it was good he decided to make a spare. Oh sorry Jimmy, I decided to have another son with my new wife, who I like more than Mommy, and his name is also going to be Jimmy. If family therapy existed in Westeros, we would probably be in a very different place politically.

Finally, finally we end for with the Night King's arrival at the wall. The new zombie ice dragon is locked and loaded and it BREATHES BLUE FIRE. The blue fire was pretty cool, and I eagerly await it's use in the dragon on dragon throw down that will inevitably occur next season.  With the power of blue fire the Wall crumbles into the sea, devastating and conclusive proof that wall's are never the answer (no matter how cool and icy they look). I have to wonder though, what was the plan for traversing the Wall without a dragon? The Night King couldn't have known one of the only three dragons in the world would fall into his clutches...what was the contingency plan? Doesn't matter, the Wall is down and I'm going to need a wellness check on Ginger Beard.

Well that's it friends, season seven! If our own nuclear winter hasn't come I'll see you back here in.....two years..... Miss ya!

Things I didn't get to:

Clegane-bowl pre-game?

Probably could have thought of some more derogatory things to say about Bran.

Cersei's fake out Stark-alliance fur-lined dress. 

What happened to Gendry?

MVP: You. You made it.

XO MD

P.S. if you want to talk to me on Twitter about incest and shitty Westerosi parenting I'm @marthadee.