#but there are real parallels there that are quite beautiful

[lesbianelsas]

"I think Rhaenyra is primarily motivated by a deep desire to be known and seen." (x)

"She definitely yearns for the old physical intimacy that they shared. It’s different from what she shares with her current husband and her children. A different form of contact." (x)

"I feel like Rhaenyra is a character who really, really struggles as an autonomous agent. She actually requires at least one person to make an ultimate act of devotion in order for her to find confidence and independence." (x)

"Honestly, I think initially there was just such a desire to connect. I think what you see initially is intimacy, and an intimacy that Rhaenyra shares so rarely." (x)

_

Bonus:

[hibiscuskissesss]

Is it Too Much to Ask

*ೃ༄

Malleus Draconia x Reader

“Stay close to me, child of man.” Malleus spoke tenderly, his body unimaginably close to yours.

You could feel his chest rising and falling with each breath, the moonlight illuminating his features like a delicate candlelight.

“I wouldn’t want you getting wet on my account.”

The umbrella overhead loomed over the both of you, ensuring protection from the rain.

━。゜✿ฺ✿ฺ゜。━

Days prior, while walking between classes, Malleus had mentioned his club and the disappointing lack of members in it.

“Maybe I have just not advertised it enough around the campus. I’ll just have to make more posters.”

Your heart clenched at his words, knowing the real reason why Malleus was the sole member- everyone else was too intimidated by his presence to even dare joining.

“Maybe I could join you next time you go out.” you offered, seeing his face light up in return.

“I would not be opposed to the idea.” He smiled downwards at the ground, obviously pleased. “We have a meeting in two days. Please meet me in the mirror room when the day comes.”

━。゜✿ฺ✿ฺ゜。━

The days passed and now you were here, standing ever so closely to Malleus.

“Gargoyles are the best when viewed during rainfall. I apologize for only having a single umbrella, Child of man. Pay it no mind.”

Despite his words, that was easier said than done in this situation.

He pointed upwards, his face bright as he smiled at the stone creature. “Do you see that one? While many view them as grotesque, gargoyles are actually positive in many ways. They prevent the erosion of the mortar on the structures they are built on, along with warding off evil spirits from entering. It’s quite fascinating, no?”

The nighttime’s luminescent sky bathed Malleus’ features, his fair skin paralleling that of the moon’s creamy color. Dark, silky strands of hair bordered his face, acting like a frame to an unthinkably beautiful painting.

His ever-present undeniable excitement was infectious, causing you to smile in return. “That actually is pretty interesting,” you admitted “but how do they make the evil stuff go away? Their appearance doesn’t seem like the type of thing that would do that.”

You looked up at the monster, being unable to argue against its scary look. Wouldn’t something more… *angelic* keep away evil? It looked kind of evil itself, if you were being honest.

Malleus responded immediately, continuing his explanation. “Well, that is exactly why their likeliness is presented in such a jarring way. They make malicious entities afraid of entering the establishment they’re guarding.”

You nodded, surprised by his vast knowledge in the subject matter. “You really know your way around this stuff, Malleus. It’s impressive.”

“You flatter me, Child of Man. It is something that has always been dear to me, so I aspire to be knowledgeable on the matter.”

━。゜✿ฺ✿ฺ゜。━

After a few more minutes of walking around and stopping to remark about a multitude of facts about the gargoyles, the rain began to pour down in an increasingly heavy rate. Only guarded by a single umbrella, the two of you found shelter under an entrance to one of the nearby buildings.

“I apologize again for only possessing one umbrella. I never had the need for multiple, so I did not have more than one.” Malleus apologized again, clearly feeling guilty that the rainfall was postponing your excursion further.

“It’s no problem- we probably would’ve had to stop either way. It’s raining too hard.” you assured him, watching his expression soften only slightly.

“I can at least do this for you.”

You watched as he slid off his raincoat, putting it over your shoulders. While not having a jacket of your own, due to Crowley’s slim budget, you couldn’t help but feel selfish taking his.

“You don’t have to- I’m fine, Malleus, really. I’d rather you be warm.”

Despite your words, you couldn’t deny how nice it felt wearing his raincoat, being insulated to keep in your heat from the cold rain.

“Don’t fret it. I feel better knowing you won’t be sick the next day just because of me.” he smiled, looking out to the grey sky. “If the rain does not clear soon, I will escort you home. It is the least I can do.”

His gaze is firm and direct, clearly telling of his sadness from the sightseeing trip being ended so abruptly.

“Malleus, you know, you can still tell me some facts. I don’t necessarily have to *see* the gargoyles to hear about them.”

Your solution lit up something in his mind, causing him to nod. “I suppose you are right- seeing them is just an added benefit that we cannot posses any further tonight.”

Together, you sat side by side on the stairs of the building, making sure he knew you were listening and attentive while he was talking.

・゜゜・．.・゜゜・・゜゜・．.・゜゜・・゜゜・

The night grew longer as Malleus continued to remark on his extensive knowledge about the stone figures, eventually lulling you into a slumber.

While you had not meant to fall asleep, the sight of your head leaning against his shoulder was an endearing sight to say the least.

He picked you up in his arms, the raincoat covering you like a blanket. A flash of green light surrounded the two of you before the Ramshackle dorm appeared in sight.

Carefully opening up the door to let himself inside, he guided himself to your bedroom before placing you down and enveloping you in a warm blanket.

He leaned down, a gentle kiss pressed to your forehead.

“Thank you for treating me tonight with your company, Child of Man. It was something better than anything I could’ve asked for.”

His hand trailed down the side of your face, ever so gently touching it.

“You’re more beautiful than any sculpture I have ever laid my eyes upon.”

Just as suddenly as he had appeared, he vanished with another flash of light, leaving you oblivious and at ease in the comfort of your mattress.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

[thesirencult]

How Does Your Crush See You

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PILE 1

Your crush sees you as someone giving, forgiving, abundant and grounded. They might find you "too practical" at times, as you are someone who is mostly focused on work/education.

Your person is probably someone you've met through family or is a close family friend. They see you as part of their extended family. This screams "childhood friends to lovers".

I believe that you are aware about their feelings and thoughts about you. Whatever your intuition says, that's it! A few of you have caught this person staring or their hand lingered for too long on your waist. These are clear signs there is something there. If they look indifferent and nonchalant then they do not view you romantically.

For those of you wondering "are those signs they like me?" yes, they are! Your relationship though is making this person feel burdened.

They would love to be with you but are afraid a confession will mess up everything between you. They also might have a few issues in their life right now and they don't want to bring you any drama.

The same might apply to you. Right now you are busy and have other things on your plate, that's what they think about you right now.

All in all, this pile will apply to you if your crush is someone close to you or your family or a coworker who might have taken you under their wing. Sidenote: This person knows you personally so they have a pretty clear image of who you are. Take care xoxo S...

PILE 2

TW: Mention of anxiety, depression and struggle.

Your crush sees you through a blurry lens, for them, nothing is clear about you. You confuse them. If I had to write a short story about you two, it would be titled "The Girl On The Train", you doing a daily activity and they are there too, staring at you from afar, waiting for you to turn and look at them, locating them and as your eyes lock, you know this person lives their life parallel with yours, always there but never touching. Your soundtrack would have been "Poison Tree by Grouper" and "Limerance by Yves Tumor".

This person, based on the feeling I get from these two songs and their overall energy, is someone who feels like they are screaming while being underwater. They need someone who will see the real them, behind the facade. They might struggle with anxiety and depression and they can tell you have a similar vibe to them. There is something about you, they can't put their finger on it. You are like a ghost to them and they are the only ones who have the magical ability to look at you and admire your beauty. They are not doing it in a creepy way though, they are sweet. They also feel quite sad cause they don't know how to approach you.

In their mind they believe you two would have amazing, deep, heartfelt conversations, no judging involved, just two open arms and lots of crying. They are soft in their core and for some reason they believe you would be able to heal them. They fantasize about touching your hair or kissing your face and wiping away tears.

The 10 of Cups also came out though, so I would say they find you very sweet, someone they would love to have as a soulmate, but they think they do not deserve someon as pure and beautiful inside and out. You are their sweet escape and they would love to get lost in your own world. It's like you are underwater and they want to come in with you, even if they drown. This person believes that love can only be felt in the darkness, the quiet, the 3AM when everyone is sleeping or partying but you are together, sitting in silence and staring into eachother's souls.

PILE 3

Pink Matter by Frank Ocean (Slowed...)

BIttersuit by Billie Eilish

This person, ahhhh, your crush is the epitome of a "soft boi" on the inside. They might not look like someone soft or particularly sweet but their eyes, aww, they make you melt! Their exterior makes you wonder "why am I attracted to them? this is wrong!" This person is meant to teach how to fall in love, crazily and with no logical explanation. You are someone who knows how to love but not how to fall in love.

You have the hierophant/ high priestess energy. For them you are way above their level. You are on a different plane, interstellar. Untouchable. You are the keeper of the sacred and that p/d is sacred, damn! In the song above, the man comes to the conclusion that women's bodies are not just vessels for men to fill or for babies to be made, they are sacred. He talks about his lover like a goddess. If you have already slept with this person you have DESTROYED them for others, or if you sleep with them at some point, it's over, you are a Goddess and they have been a lucky mortal that got to touch you.

Also, if you are curvy/thick they actually love that. In the song there is a lyric about "models are for modelling thick girls are for cuddling". I want to say that this person might be a bit toxic when it comes to those stereotypes. They might follow a lot of instagram models who fit the beauty standard, or you know that their previous gf looked like a model yet they don't consider them "marriage material". Like, this person can have bad habits (smoking, drinking, driving fast, p*rn) and this is driving you insane, because they are not your type, but what I'm seeing is that this person is at a point in their lives that they have started reconsidering their actions and you will play a big part in that.

This person is not that experienced in love. They are experienced when it comes to matters of the flesh but once they are in love they turn to jello. They think about you particularly when they get h*gh. They had a revelation about you while being stoned or in a dream. They find you very beautiful and if you walked up to them and told them you want to lose excessive amounts of weight or you don't feel beautiful they would be SHOOK! They are like "why change perfection?" OH, they are also telling me, tell them to not listen to their bad thoughts" and they want to tell you they know that what they think about you doesn't align with how you view yourself. You think you are a goblin and they see you as an Aphrodite/Cleopatra.

They know you are traditional and serious, wise and calm and they want some of that. They want a spiritual person by their side and someone who will look deeper. They are well aware that you are an unlikely match. The chances they get with you are veryyyy slim. I'm hearing "I don't have a chance, but I'll try."

Wow, don't get scared if they approach and do not reject them. They have a huge heart. Also, the miss your presence if they haven't seen you in a while. They have a crush on you and their friends make fun of them, because it started in a joking manner, they might see you in passing. As an example, they might ride a mototrcycle and they see you almost everyday passing by the park or the beach and they tell their friends "Oh I saw my girl yesterday. She's so hot. There is somthing about her" and now they've been telling them "Have you guys seen my wife? I haven't seen her in a week." Their friends think they are joking but they truly miss you !

[harocat]

Why Inuyasha fans should watch hit Chinese fantasy drama Love Game in Eastern Fantasy.

This wonderful art was created by Sparky! You can find her twt account here, and if you're interested in commissioning something yourself, her vgen account here.

I promised I'd make this post, and I also promised I'd commission some chibis of the lead pairs from both shows swapping outfits as to entice you, so here we go. If the adorable art isn't enough to convince you, read this way!

Love Game in Eastern Fantasy is a 2024 Chinese fantasy drama starring Esther Yu and Ding Yuxi. It's thirty-two episodes long. The show has been a big hit in China due to its charming storyline, hilarious meta-humor, strong performances, beautiful costumes and sets, and well crafted characters. Let me get this out of the way first; yes, that is the English title of the series, and yes it's a pretty bad and unappealing sounding title. It's not uncommon for English titles of Chinese dramas to be kind of terrible. I promise it does not reflect the quality of the series itself. The original Chinese title is 永夜星河 (Yong Ye Xing He: Eternal Night of Starry River). This, although pretty, doesn't have much to do with the series either. For the rest of the post, I will be abbreviating the title to LGIEF.

Let's start with an introduction of our lead characters, then we'll go into why I think Inuyasha fans specifically will enjoy this series, although it should become quite obvious along the way.

Ling Miaomiao

Funny, compassionate, and clever, Ling Miaomiao is a young woman from the twenty-first century who is transmigrated out of her boring every day work life and into the novel Catching Demons. Once inside, she retains her memories of the real world and is given two main tasks by 'the system', the mysterious force that governs her stay in this parallel world; the first one is to stop the catastrophe of heaven, a potentially world ending event, and the second... is to make the second male lead of the original novel, a standoffish, suspicious young man named Mu Sheng, fall in love with her.

The problem is that she hasn't been transmigrated as Ling Miaomiao, but is instead in the body of the character of Lin Yu, the second female lead of the original novel, as well as an antagonist. Well, Ling Miaomiao doesn't have it in her to be a villain, and besides how can she capture the affection of Mu Sheng that way? It turns out that the best way to do so is by being herself. But of course, as goes in these stories, she didn't expect to fall in love along the way.

Miaomiao is, in addition to having one of the best wardrobes I've ever seen, so charming, so cute, so amusing, and such a sunshine of a character. She's not pliant. She sticks to her guns and doesn't take shit, but she's also kind, tolerant, accepting, and borderline fearless at times. Esther Yu has wonderful comic timing. She is a delight.

Mu Sheng

Courtesy name 'Ziqi', and what I'll be referring to him as in this post. Ziqi is the second male lead in the novel Catching Demons and the adopted younger brother of the novel's protagonist, Mu Yao. He's very close to his sister, and his self esteem is debilitatingly low, to the point he sees protecting her as the only reason for his existence. In the original novel, he becomes an antagonist at a later point.

Ziqi and his sister, Mu Yao, are demon catchers. They're both powerful cultivators (magic users) and warriors. Her family (and his adopted family--- sort of) were all killed by a powerful demon called the Resentful Woman about a decade before, and Mu Yao is on a quest to find her and defeat her, with Ziqi tagging along. But Ziqi has a secret, and it's one that he is terrified of his sister, who abhors demons, finding out. He is half demon himself. A gold ribbon he wears in his hair at all times protects him, keeping his true identity hidden unless it's removed.

He loathes his heritage and sees it as shameful-- until Ling Miaomiao comes along. Ziqi is brusque, angry, and bitter. He has a front of bravado, but is DEEPLY insecure. He starts out very rude. He's love starved but shirks away from love. He's jaded, but extremely innocent. He's a tsundere (even described as such in official material, which I found funny). His actor pulls off the best sad kitten eyes any man ever has, and your heart will break for him.

To clarify, although in the original novel Catching Demons, Ziqi and Miaomiao are not the leads, in the drama Love Game in Eastern Fantasy, they 300% are! This is a story about what happens when the second leads... become the leads.

Other Major Characters

Mu Yao- Ziqi's adopted older sister. He is extremely close to and protective of her, but her hatred of demons due to her past makes it so revealing his secret seems impossible. Mu Yao is a demon catcher from the famous Mu clan, which has been the most prominent demon catching clan for nine hundred years. She is friendly and no-nonsense, and as the story continues, she grows and matures in her views. She is very close to Ling Miaomiao, and she is in love with the original male lead of the novel, Liu Fuyi.

Liu Fuyi- The original male lead of the novel. He starts out quite 'wooden', which I think is deliberate because Ling Miaomiao even commented on him being a badly written character as she read the original novel. However, as the story goes on and he becomes more of a real person, he fills out and ends up likable. Stalwart, calm, and noble, he is in love with Mu Yao but dares not say it. He has a more nuanced, less prejudiced view of demons than Mu Yao does.

Cuicui- The last member of our group of demon catching travelers. Cuicui is a young bamboo demon who quickly bonds with Ling Miaomiao, sneaking along by turning himself into a bamboo hair pin she wears. He is very Shippou in that he adores LMM and bickers with Ziqi, but I actually do like him a lot better than his Inuyasha counterpart. He's quite useful, and he forms a pretty sweet bond with Ziqi over time. I have read that Cuicui is not ever gendered in the original dialogue, but as I'm unsure of this, I defaulted to the gender of his actor (who is a total cutiepie btw).

You can very much see even from here how the main cast really fills those Inuyasha roles! Together, they are the Four Bamboo Masters.

(Actual art of the Four Bamboo Masters+Cuicui by artist extraordinaire Ling Miaomiao)

The World

The universe of Catching Demons is a fantasy ancient China filled with yao which is the Mandarin Chinese word for demons of the variety featured in the series. If you understand youkai, you somewhat understand yao.

Japanese "yokai" is the Japanese transliteration or pronunciation of the Chinese term "yaoguai" and involves similarly strange creatures, with both languages using the same Chinese characters to describe them. ( x )

Yao in this world are for the most part, morally neutral, but are generally viewed as evil by humans. Those that are evil often ended up going that direction because of humanity's actions toward them. They can form from aspects of nature; bamboo, foxes, water, cats, birds, etc. There are also object based yao based on mirrors, paintbrushes, etc. Inuyasha fans will definitely see some similarities in the folklore between the series.

As with many high budget Chinese dramas, the settings are beautiful and atmospheric, capturing both the gorgeous architecture, clothing, etc. of a fantasy ancient China, as well as the nature and magic of this specific world. The effects are quality for a tv production, and the costumes, makeup, and wigs are next level. There's so much rich detail in them. Ling Miaomiao's hair ornaments alone deserve an entire post praising them.

Since this is also a transmigration story, the mechanics of 'the system' often come into play. This results in some of the best humor in the series. Ling Miaomiao's battle with the system is hilarious and clever. It's rendered as if it is a video game, with LMM in the early episodes 'dying' and having to respawn... many, many times. In order to clear her mission, Ling Miaomiao must get Mu Sheng to 100% favorability toward her, which is calculated adorably by little mushroom shaped demons.

One of the biggest appeals of the series is Miaomiao's modern mind set in this ancient world, and the fact that since she believes this to be just a novel at first, she is hysterically meta, often commenting on the quality of the story and well...

The Love Story

This love story is like crack to Inuyasha/Kagome fans (aka me). You should have gotten the vibe of the obvious character similarities from above, but their romance plays with so many of the tropes that made InuKag great and pulls them off so well. It doesn't feel like a rehash, it just happens to use similar tropes to great impact.

Look, this scene is spoiler-y for episode eleven, but I just think that if anything is going to sell you on this show, it's probably going to be this scene, so watch it.

In it, Ziqi has been forced to remove his hair ribbon to battle a demon, because he's not near strong enough without doing so. The rest is self explanatory from the video.

This is a really gentle love story. It has a lot of what I love about InuKag, which is a casual intimacy, a soft, sometimes unspoken affection, and a chemistry between the characters that speaks of a deep connection that goes far beyond just their romantic attraction. These are two people that click, and it's beautiful to watch the way they impact each other. It's about support, belief, trust, and acceptance. They start off very much on the wrong foot, as our intrepid lovers in IY do, but when they come together, it's all of that and more, plus a level of playful bickering.

I, Mu Ziqi, swear to the heavens that if I lose you somehow, I'll come back to find you. No matter how far it is, no matter how hard it is, I will bring you back.

And I am not the only one who has noticed the similarities to Inuyasha:

1, 2

Plus all the likes and reblogs on this post.

What else does the show have to offer?

I don't really want to go further into spoilers, but I love the themes of this story. It's about learning to love yourself, trust, and compassion of course, but it also ends up being a super uplifting commentary on the power of storytelling, memory, the impact fiction can have on us, the way love is laced into everything we create, and the power simple acts of kindness can have. The value of this series goes far beyond just being similar to Inuyasha, although that's definitely a plus.

Famous last words from early series Ling Miaomiao. Girl, you have no idea.

Does it have a happy ending?

Yes. I will leave it at that.

But I've never watched a Chinese drama...

This is a great place to start. There's little to nothing that should confuse you as a first time watcher. It's a perfect introduction.

Where can I watch it?

Luckily, unlike a lot of Cdramas, LGIEF is extremely accessible and available on several streaming sites. It's on Netflix, Viki, Youtube (up to ep twenty-three), and WeTV. If you have a Netflix account, it's there right now!! Audio is Mandarin Chinese of course, but subtitles are available in several languages.

If you do watch it, let me know! And make sure to share this post of course.

I watched LGIEF and I loved it (of course). What should I watch next?

Here's a few Chinese dramas that are readily available streaming, that I think LGIEF fans would enjoy:

Love Between Fairy and Devil (thirty-six episodes, streaming on Netflix, Viki, and IQIYI): When a low-ranked fairy accidentally resurrects a powerful demon, their fates become cosmically entangled as the world is thrown into turmoil.

For me, not just my favorite fantasy drama of all time, but my favorite drama period. Like LGIEF, this drama stars Esther Yu in the role of the heroine. One of the screenwriters is also the same as LGIEF, and much of the production team is similar.

This is a gorgeous story of the redemptive power of love of all kinds, of breaking the cycle of war, and of defying fate no matter the cost. A fantastic cast, stunning costumes, and the best soundtrack ever. If you're like me and are wary of the 'good girl changes the bad boy' trope, don't be. Dongfang Qingcang (the male lead) is an amazing character; he's deep and layered and complex, and he is never actually a villain. His trauma is convincing, and everything about him is so, so good. Xiao Lanhua is the heroine. Her character arc is so lovingly done. The two leads don't change for each other, they change because of each other. It's simultaneously one of the funniest dramas I've ever seen and devastatingly heartbreaking. You will laugh, you will cry. Happy ending though, I promise.

The Romance of Tiger and Rose (twenty-four episodes, streaming on Amazon Prime, WeTV, and Viki): A young screenwriter falls ill while working on a script and wakes up as one of her characters.

Confession that I am still working on watching this one, but it's quite popular and the first episodes are charming. It's mainly on here because it stars Ding Yuxi (Ziqi) as the love interest in another transmigration story. It's also not as long as a lot of other dramas, so it's a bit less of a commitment. It's a well known drama that is highly rated in most places.

Destined (forty episodes, streaming on IQIYI): Liu Yuru has suffered in her family; her only hope is to marry her crush, but fateful events force her to marry a rumored playboy from a rich family.

This is not the most appealing summary, but I promise it's misleading. This show is good. The main couple is ride or die, and they become best friends long before they become a couple. The heroine is extremely smart, capable, and business savvy. The hero is charming, funny, and so charismatic. It's the most fun you will ever have watching people do business (I kid; there is business, but there is so much more to the plot). The supporting cast is fantastic, and the relationships!! Wonderful friendships between women, wonderful friendships between men, and wonderful platonic friendships between men and women. SUPER good at subverting tropes. This is a costume drama, not a fantasy, but you won't miss the magic. Oh and did I mention this is by the screenwriter behind LGIEF and LBFAD?

Love You Seven Times (thirty-eight episodes, streaming on IQIYI): It tells the story of Xiang Yun, a fairy from Marriage Pavilion who becomes entangled with the ancient God of War, Chu Kong. Because of this encounter, they must go through tribulations in the human world seven times.

Stars Ding Yuxi (Ziqi) in the role of the hero. An ultimately flawed, but still fun fantasy drama. Gorgeous costumes, wigs, sets, etc., and a lot of heart. Don't expect writing as slick as some of the other dramas here, but do expect to enjoy yourself watching these two immortals discover each other while fumbling throughout seven very different lifetimes. Each lifetime has its own very unique vibes and aesthetic, and seeing how they all pan out if half the fun. Plus, if you like Inuyasha, you absolutely must see the arc where Chu Kong becomes a cat demon.

Moonlight (thirty-six episodes, streaming on Amazon Prime, Viki, IQIYI): After graduating university with a major in financing, Chu Li successfully enters her dream company, Yuan Yue Publishing House. There she meets author Zhou Chuan, who is said to be gentle as a jade when he's really not.

I can’t believe I forgot this at first! I haven’t seen it yet, but it’s a previous collaboration between Esther Yu and Ding Yuxi from 2021. If you enjoy their chemistry and the way they play off each other in LGIEF, you may want to check it out. It’s a modern romance drama, which isn’t as much my thing, but it’s deeply loved by a lot of drama fans and has great reviews.

[beifong-brainrot]

I do find it annoying how a lot of Zutara fans tweak the character's stories, personalities and even the timelines to suit their own needs.

Once again, there's nothing wrong with fanon and headcanons, however if looking through the lense of canon, you're objectively wrong.

I ended up stumbling on a post from a Zutara shipper. (At this point I'm regretfully considering not following the tags for Zuko or Katara because I get way too much Zutara content lol) I'm not replying directly to her because I don't want this to turn into an argument, and I know she doesn't take criticism very well.

Ok, So let's break this down.

The character who was first out of the group to trust Zuko?

I'm quite sure this is referring to the scene in Ba Sing Se's caves. And yes, that is a very important scene. I think it's a very important scene preceeding Zuko's 'relapse'. It shows how he's matured during his time in Ba Sing Se and therefore it serves to add to our dismay when he joins Azula. I adore the fact that Zuko's journey to redemption is not linear, it certainly adds a lot to the character and shows us how his trauma affected him.

It's also a horrific moment for Katara. To have her worldview on Zuko and firebenders as a whole challenged, and then for it to go blowing up in her face. It rips open old wounds of her childhood. It refreshes her resentment of Zuko and the Fire Nation as a whole. It parallels the death of her mother when Aang dies due to Azula's lighting and she is unable to do anything about it. It places her back in that spot of helplessness. Even though she's grown up, even though she's a master waterbender, she still comes a hair's breadth to losing one of the most important people in her life.

No wonder she hated Zuko so much after this.

It's an important moment for both characters, but I wouldn't say it is that in a romantic sense. It's a sweet, hopeful moment that then turns absolutely horrific and visceral for both parties.

I could argue that there are other characters who could be given the title of 'first to trust Zuko'. Funnily, Appa being one of them lol.

But other characters trusting Zuko dovetails nicely into the next point.

The character who emotionally connects to Zuko?

Well, technically, I'd argue that most members of the Gaang connect emotionally on one level or another with him?

But I'd argue that Aang is the person Zuko connected with the most. Aang is Zuko's parallel. Aang is the first person to reach out to Zuko. Aang is the person who showed mercy to Zuko, multiple times. Aang is the person who valued Zuko's life, the life of someone whose whole life goal is to capture him.

This was also an incredibly important moment to Zuko. This is the thing he brings up when trying to convince the Gaang to let him join.

Zuko: Why aren't you saying anything? You once said you thought we could be friends. You know I have good in me.

The character Zuko feels safest letting his guard down around?

It's Mai. Love her or hate her, her relationship with Zuko is incredibly important to him. Maiko isn't my favourite Zuko ship, in full honesty. But even platonically, Mai and Zuko are one another's reprieve from their respective shitty lives.

People often talk about Katara touching Zuko's scar while discussing healing his scar, however one could argue that she did so as a medical examination. Mai touching Zuko's scar is a casual thing, neither of them really make a big deal of it and that's the beauty of it.

I'm mainly talking out of my own personal experience, as someone with a huge amount of burn scars, but there is a world of difference between someone inspecting my scars like Katara did and simply accepting them as a part of me, like Mai does for Zuko.

With Mai, Zuko isn't the scarred banished prince, Ozai's son or Azula's brother. He's just Zuko. And they speak freely with one another, arguing like real people do. Often, being comfortable having arguments is actually a sign of being comfortable with one another.

The character who helps Zuko heal from his trauma?

Once again, this is a bit of a flawed question. By the end of the show, Zuko isn't even fully healed, in my opinion. He has made leaps and bounds on the road to recovery, but when he will truly heal if ever is yet to be seen.

Zuko's journey to recovery includes plenty of people. This includes Iroh, Aang, Song and Jin. People who show him the error of his coping mechanism. Who challenge his worldview, who coax him out of the his shell of pain and anger.

The character known for showing most compassion to others?

Yes, Katara's compassion is a huge part of her character. Her need to help and protect those who cannot do that for themselves cannot be understated.

But Aang's compassion for others and all beings is just as great, if not greater than Katara's. Compassion and nonviolence are huge parts of his culture and his own philosophy.

Aang: Wait, we can't just leave him here. Sokka: Sure we can. Let's go. Aang :No, if we leave him he'll die. Aang airbends himself off Appa and retrieves Zuko, bringing him to Appa. Sokka: [Sarcastically.] Yeah, this makes a lot of sense. Let's bring the guy who's constantly trying to kill us.

Friendly reminder that Aang could've absolutely wrecked Ozai, but held back because his own moral compass was so powerful. Hell, he was friendly and nice to Azula, the woman who literally killed him.

This is why Aang and Katara work so well together. They're both incredibly compassionate people who will immediately jump in to help others in need. Like they did during the Painted Lady, destroying the factiry together.

The character who primarily bears the burden of having to step up into a parental role?

I think "parental role" is an incredibly vague term. There's a lot of things that go into a "parental role". Katara plays a stereotypically "maternal" role, while someone who plays a "paternal" one would probably be Sokka.

Katara deals with very "homemaking" tasks like sewing and cooking, etc. And Sokka often takes on the role of leader, hunter, gatherer and also protector, despite being a nonbender.

This coincides nicely with their core childhood traumas. The loss of Katara's mother impacted her greatly, leading her to have to step up into a motherly role. While Sokka was clearly heavily traumatised by his father departing and the crushing responsibility of having to care for his entire village.

Sexism also probably played a part in this dichotomy.

The character who represses their emotions to be strong for others?

I'd argue that this could apply to all the members of the Gaang in some capacity.

Aang's pain is something most of us will never experience and cannot hope to understand. The complete horrific destruction of his culture and home followed him through the entire show. He was entitled to his grief and rage, yet he supressed it. We see during Appa's kidnapping, how easy it would be for Aang to rage, to let himself be destructive. And yet, he wakes up every day and chooses to smile and goof off, because his friends need someone to remind them how to be children.

Sokka puts on a very impressive bravado, despite having a lot of insecurities. However, as the oldest member of the Gaang (pre Zuko) he puts on a facade of the confident and unbothered older brother. Even if he's the butt of almost every joke, he still keeps that demeanour up, letting it slip only a few times.

I'd actually argue that Toph is the person whom this label fits best. While we know Toph as witty, callous and strong, we have to remember that she kept up the facade of her parents' good, helpless little blind girl for no reason other than her mother and father's comfort. She actually hides a lot of her hurt, covering it up with a prickly exterior.

I want to do longer think pieces about Toph and Katara so apologies if this isn't complete.

I'm actually baffled by the idea of Katara repressing her emotions. She's actually quite straightforward and open about her feelings. She yells and feels a lot of emotions and lets them be heard. She gets angry and sad. She's actually kinda bitchy sometimes and that's honestly why I love her so much.

The whole inciting incident of the show was her getting so pissed off she somehow pulls a giant iceberg from the bottom of the sea.

She is anything but repressed.

She is angry.

She's angry at the fire nation, at Sokka, at her father, at men, and with good right to be so.

This is what makes her an amazing character and one who broke the mould of a lot of female characters at the time. Her anger and unrestrained emotions rang true with a lot of watchers at the time. I'm not sure why this is being taken away from her rather than celebrated.

I reiterate the point I made at the beginning of this post: there is nothing wrong with headcanons and fanon interpretations for one's enjoyment. I do find it a bit odd when it changes a character too much (because then, why not just create an oc?) but it's all in good fun. However, you shouldn't push that onto other people and how they perceive canon and you certainly shouldn't use it to take away from other characters. It's a very unfair way of entering discourse.

[kalied0skull]

“ front and center, girly! ”

— “ yeah, I'm hearin'! ”

now playing: Hey Cowgirl — Mac Demarco ♪

★ ramble & extras under the cut !

it was only a matter of time until i got my grubby hands on cowgirl curtis, i have been running around grabbing EVERRYYY SINGLEEE trans headcanon and absolutely eating that shit UP!!!

shout out to @trevination & @broareweabouttoviberightnow because when scrambling around for ideas to draw her I've discovered that she is your guys' collective daughter and it feels only right to show her to you (so sorry for the @'s I'm not prone to tagging people but i take it you both wouldn't mind much 💀)

this is my little take on cowgirl! and AAAUGHHHH I LOVE HERRRRR I DOOOOO!!!! i am holding her so gently in my hands and brushing her hair with a tiny little comb ,, she's my gal. ..

soemthing about transfem curtis brothers makes my heart go wah, i love them really i do they're so lovely to me

I don't have many headcanons of cowgirl at the moment, but i am obsessed with the idea of calling her "girly" (thankyou to my memaw, who uses girly and inspired the idea) — like... pony / girly? the parallels... okay whatever I'm shutting up i promise /j+silly

anyways, whilst trying to make up a little design for her, i got a bit sidetracked and made this drawing of ponyboy and cowgirl sharing a cigarette and having a real short talk

the specific ponyboy i have there IS post-story, his bleached and overgrown hair making a weird appearance in the drawing. i dunno, i like to imagine post-canon pb would have a way more enamored response to cowgirl compared to pre or during.

he's really in love with the girl he becomes in another universe, even if it might not be him. he still loves her no matter what, and i think that's really neat :D

my favorite little detail of cowgirl has to be the little designs i put on her clothes, something tells me she is a girl who is in LOVE with embroidery. i think it might be one of the things she picked up when transitioning, because you always have to be a little punk in terms of being transgender in my opinion — and i take cowgirl to be quite crafty :3c

i just think she'd fawn over tiny flowers and spirals all over her stuff, because "they are so cute n' simple, right?! but they're so complex and cool!" and awawawahhh... she just likes her details in my eyes

anyways i really really REALLY enjoyed making this drawing, mostly digital though – the traditional sketch was a hit of a process, i accidentally made her too tall at some point and was like "??? nuh uh" 💀 but she's beautiful and she's such a doll and wahhh my babyy...

i hope all the transfem pb fans out there can appreciate another addition to the gallery, I'd also like to shout out GLORBIEZ' ART !!! who also inspired me very heavily to make my own version!

please please please go look at it glorbiez is an amazing artist and i really love their take on cowgirl /BEGGING, DESPERATE (/silly)

who am i if not to jump on a trend with a very niche headcanon amirite ;3

[cirphu]

Timelines, Jewelry, and Sex? Oh My!

Despite all efforts to keep myself from constantly overanalyzing love scenes on this site, here I am once again. And this time I've brought three (3) of them!

It was honestly inevitable because in a series like this where sex quite literally drives the plot, these scenes are necessary to understanding the story and characters, and in turn must be discussed. That said, walk with me lovelies. We have a lot to cover. Theories and takeaways are in blue, and questions and discourse are welcome.

Great and Tyme's love scene was so beautiful and truly a joy to witness which is why it pains me to say that it was not real. At this point, we can all agree that there are multiple timelines in play. That's why I think their love scene and the moments that lead up to it were what Great wishes their relationship was like if he had made all the right choices and met Tyme under different circumstances.

I think their relationship started with a one-night stand possibly initiated by Tyme to get closer to Great and his family.

Now before I attempt to provide evidence to support my thesis, I need to point out one thing about the timelines—they are parallel. Great's first 4-minute out of body experience establishes that point.

Sure, going back in time allows him to make a different, often better choice, but the timeline in which he made his initial choice continues.

That is why we see him wake from the "nightmare" of seeing Manee lying dead on the ground after he hits her and drives off. That timeline is still in motion and part of him has experienced and is still experiencing it.

The notion of parallel timelines is further supported by the final scene in episode 4 where we see two timelines seemingly collide as Dome returns home in one and is dead in another.

I highly recommend reading this post by @becauseimanicequeen which has an extraordinary breakdown of possible timelines and the differences between them.

Taking what we've seen so far into account, my theory is that each 4-minute jump creates a new timeline or a new branch in an existing timeline that later merges back into it's parent timeline while all events and memories remain intact. Lukwa provides a bit of insight on this during her interview with Dr. Den:

What I plan to discuss in this post is based on the premise that there at least 4 timelines in play for Great-Tyme's part of the story:

Great hits Manee and drives off → has his first 4-minute jump (4MJ) → a new timeline is created; this one continues with memories intact → ?

Great hits Manee, stays, and calls for help → visits her at the hospital and delivers flowers to her room where they talk for a bit → bumps into Tyme and tries to leave, but ends up having a 4MJ → a new timeline is created; this one continues w/ memories intact → ?

Great leaves the flowers he brought for Manee at the nurse's station → first instance of seeing visions of he and Tyme having sex on 2 different occasions → bumps into Tyme, says sorry, and helps him pick up the papers → Title kills Dome and Great has a 4MJ → a new timeline is created; this one continues w/ memories intact → (this is where Tonkla and Win would come in, but they're not my focus atm) → ?

Great saves Dome and takes him to the hospital → Tyme sutures his wound; Great recalls visions of him riding Tyme → Tyme saves him from being choked out/killed by Title in the garage → Tyme brings Great his favorite iced tea and is rejected when he asks Great out → Great has a 4MJ, explains what's been going on to Tyme and asks him out → claw machine date at the mall and almost kiss in the car (interspersed with another round of visions of his other self and Tyme from T2 sleeping together; I'll explain later) → Tyme attacks Korn looking for answers about Nan's whereabouts → Great confronts Tyme at the hospital → has a second 4MJ and promises to help find Nan → Great finds Nan, but hesitates and fails to save her → has a third 4MJ, manages to save Nan, and escapes with Tyme's help → they quickly drop Nan off at the hospital and skip town → sleep together

Since Great has had three 4MJs in T4 (the current timeline), it is plausible that 3 additional timelines may have been created but I don't think that's the case because (1) four is a thematic number in the series and (2) T4 is the timeline that offers the most continuity in sequence of events.

It's also interesting to note that Great's 4MJs have become more frequent and life-threatening which could mean that he's on the right track and/or nearing the end.

That aside, the timeline I want to focus on is T2, which is where I think one of their sexual encounters takes place. Let's take a look at the timeline as if Great's 4MJ does not occur:

Great hits Manee, stays with her, and calls for help

Great visits Manee at the hospital and delivers flowers to her room where they talk for a bit

Great, unnerved by his conversation with Manee, bumps into Tyme and leaves

Great meets Tyme at a bar and they end up having a one-night stand

This scene was the sole catalyst for this post because Great seems to be wearing the same outfit he had on when he visited Manee at the hospital—jewelry and all.

Our rich boy may like wearing black and white, but he is not one for repeating outfits.

While chatting at the bar, they're conversation indicates that they remember bumping into each other at the hospital. However, unlike in T3 and T4, they don't seem to know each other beyond that. It's possible that Tyme may have some info on Great because he is investigating his family, but they're essentially strangers both to us and each other. This Dr. Tyme (T2) is not the rizz-less one we know and love from T4 because he manages to charm his way into spending the night with Great (this is speculation; Great very well could have done the charming and Tyme got lucky). How do we know this? Great's visions from the first time he bumped into Tyme at the hospital (T3) and the almost-kiss in the car (T4) show us what happens next.

Great-Tyme are seen holding hands as they enter Great's condo. I will admit that this is quite familiar behavior for people who've essentially just met, but holding hands with your one-night stand is entirely possible. That aside, if you look closely you'll notice that Tyme is wearing a silver paperclip bracelet and Great is wearing his favored watch.

These are the same pieces of jewelry that they're wearing when Tyme kisses Great's chest on the pool table ... which is insane choice of a flat surface to start a romp on when the bed is literally a few feet away, but I get it. Where else would one serve a full-course meal if not on a table?

Anyway~ Tyme is also wearing a necklace which will be of note in a sec, but what I find interesting is the stark difference in this Tyme's gaze and demeanor in comparison to the one in episode 4. He appears to be more confident and decisive.

A man on a mission and who knows exactly what he's doing. That said, if we ever get the entirety of this scene, I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't kiss Great on the lips because there seems to be an emotional distance between them that is not present in the love scene we saw in episode 4.

Now back to Tyme's necklace. He appears to be wearing it in another scene from the trailer where he's standing next to Great's window so it's safe to assume that it's the same day.

I can't decide whether his gaze is menacing or not, but he is holding a rag and something black and shiny that looks like a switchblade a phone so we'll just have to wait and see.

So far we've looked at 2 of the 3 Great-Tyme love scenes shown in the trailer. The third, which also takes place in Great's condo, is one that also gives me pause because once again, Tyme's gaze is different.

Something about the way he looks at Great does not read as the Tyme we've been seeing over the last 4 episodes.

But what's most notable to me in this love scene is that neither of them is wearing any jewelry. Great doesn't wear jewelry at home, so not having any jewelry on in this scene isn't out of the ordinary. Tyme on the other hand, is NEVER without his smartwatch. And as I'm writing this, I've realized that we've never seen any indication of what time it is when Tyme is alone. The only instance we've seen a clock in direct relation to Tyme is on his phone when he exchanged numbers with Great at the skatepark.

So, is any of what we've seen so far real?

Yes and no. The only thing that has been real and consistent throughout Great-Tyme's storyline is the certainty of death; impending or otherwise. And because of that, neither Great's nor Tyme's perspectives are reliable.

It may feel like we are getting the full picture, but there is always something missing in between.

If you've made it this far, thanks for reading. Now off to episode 5 to see how wrong I am XD

[crustyfloor]

Link to the translated Q&A Vivinos and Qmeng had recently.

....Guess that means it'll be very long (hopefully) and very good? honestly just scared for what round 7 will bring, it's probably gonna be the last round in the series, and with all the tension buildup this'll be stressful i assume

Yeah, Luka was set to be a popular figure from the jump, there was no way his trick with the Sua imitation was more than just a power trip (Or just a genuine mental break on Mizi's part). because either way with the way Mizi was holding herself up during round 5, she stood 0 chance against him.

Luka, just like the others doesn't actually have real control over his position in Alien stage. So in order to set that boundary for himself and others he uses his presence and the stage because, in any other context, he is simply just a tool and a frail (old) man. (And he has in-universe stans how beautiful)

More Luka lore please vivinos....

Kinda glad this got changed, because imagine this cute guy gradually turning into the Ivan we know now and then doing the shit he did in round 6? then doing the dream face reveal showing that he never truly changed, he just had a mask on. that shit would be 10x more devastating (even though the way it is now is just as devastating) Ivan and Luka twins (scary stuff but quite intriguing, even now they're still quite similar in some ways)

Augh...it is true though. Aliens and humans are just far to vast in traits to relate to each other on such a level, this reminds me of Mizi and Guardian Shine. Guardian Shine might've been the only guardian shown in the alien stage cast to actually be kind. She even seemed to be crying when she had to send Mizi away to go to Anakt(?). I find it kinda sweet though, that the ones who do actually care really show it and try even if they can't understand their pets that well.

But I also like the more grim side to it, because when you don't understand something specifically another being in this case you're less likely to have sympathy for it. Humans and Aliens don't have any relatable traits so whatever these aliens do to the humans whether for self-pleasure or such. And lab-mice? that confirms lab-rat theory. Alien stage crew were all just succesful experiments and the bad batch are kept behind for further testing i theorize. but its still pretty vague so we'll see. hopefully things get more grim ((

......What are you hiding Vivinos. (she rlly said do your homework....okay mum...i will catch you...)

A story about the death of close loved ones and how that can affect characters who are alive in the long run. im gonna throw up.

(NOT AGAIN WITH THE DEAD WIFE PARALLEL MIZI IS NOT HIS WIFE-)

"Ivan is the perfect man" 😭 I love the details of round 6 clothing so much, even I got that superior or dominating aura from Ivan when I first saw him in round 6 (💀) there wasn't really much to his outfit but the way he carried himself in it kinda just gave off that idea that he's the one in control here. but gradually, we can see that facade fade as he got more into his feelings the more he sang and sunk down to a level where he was most natural. eugh.....

[petrov88]

Kathir was a handsome young man living in the bustling city of Mumbai. He had always been popular among girls, but deep down, he felt something missing - an unexplainable yearning for men that he couldn't quite put into words.One day, on a whim, Kathir decided to get a bold new haircut at a trendy salon. The stylist convinced him to try a messy, asymmetrical look with choppy layers that framed his face. As Kathir gazed at his reflection, he noticed a certain allure to this edgier version of himself.On the subway ride home, Kathir caught the eye of a pierced and tattooed man sitting across from him. Their gazes locked, and Kathir felt a jolt of electricity course through his body.

The stranger flashed a charming smile, revealing a silver stud glinting in his left eyebrow. Kathir found himself captivated by the mysterious man's rugged beauty. As the train lurched forward, the stranger stood up and approached Kathir.Hey there, cute haircut, he said, his voice low and smooth like honey. I'm Raja.Kathir's heart raced as he shook Raja's hand, feeling the warmth of his touch. Thanks... I just got it done, he replied, trying to sound casual despite the butterflies in his stomach.Raja leaned in closer, his breath tickling Kathir's ear. You know, that style really suits you. Makes your eyes pop even more. He paused, then added, And those lips... perfect for kissing.

Kathir stumbled home in a daze, his mind reeling from the encounter with Raja. As he passed a street mirror, he froze in horror. There, reflected back at him, was a completely different person - his face now adorned with multiple piercings, each one glinting menacingly in the sunlight.Panic set in as Kathir frantically tried to wipe away the metal studs, but they remained stubbornly in place. His hands trembled as he approached the bathroom mirror, bracing himself for the worst.The image staring back was surreal yet undeniably real. Kathir's once pristine features were now marked by industrial-style piercings - a barbell through his nose, rings in his eyebrows, and even a hoop in his lower lip.

Kathir's shock turned to disbelief as he stepped inside his apartment. Everything seemed to have shifted, as if he'd entered a parallel universe. His wardrobe, once filled with crisp business attire, now held a rainbow of vibrant clothing - neon tank tops, tight jeans, and even a few skirts.In the center of the room, his tailored suit hung on a rack, but instead of its usual charcoal gray, it was a hot pink number with flashy gold buttons. Kathir's eyes widened as he picked it up, the fabric surprisingly soft against his skin.As he explored further, he discovered his dresser drawers had been raided, their contents replaced with an array of colorful accessories - chunky belts, studded chokers, and enough eyeliner to paint a small town. Even his bedding had transformed, now sporting a playful print of cartoon characters in various states of undress.

Overwhelmed, Kathir collapsed onto his newly reupholstered bed, the plush velvet enveloping him like a sensual embrace. He buried his face in the pillows, inhaling deeply, and was surprised to detect a faint scent of musk and leather.As he lay there, Kathir began to notice subtle changes within himself. His senses felt heightened, and his skin tingled with an unfamiliar heat. He became acutely aware of the piercings adorning his face, the metal cool against his flushed cheeks.Suddenly, a wave of arousal washed over him, leaving him breathless and hardening beneath his pants. Kathir's mind raced, trying to comprehend what was happening to his body and his desires. He reached down to adjust himself, his fingers brushing against the growing bulge, when a knock at the door shattered the intimate moment.

Kathir groaned in frustration, not wanting to be disturbed in his state of confusion and arousal. But the persistent knocking continued, growing louder and more insistent.With a heavy sigh, he reluctantly made his way to the door, adjusting his disheveled appearance as best he could. When he opened it, he was greeted by the same pierced and tattooed man from the subway, Raja, standing in the hallway with a mischievous grin.Well, well, looks like someone's embracing their inner rebel, Raja teased, his gaze roaming over Kathir's altered appearance. I must say, the makeover suits you. Though I think we're just getting started...Before Kathir could respond, Raja slipped past him into the apartment, his presence filling the space with an electric energy.

Kathir watched in amazement as Raja sauntered into his living room, his own outfit shifting before Kathir's eyes. The tight black jeans and band tee disappeared, replaced by a snug pink button-down shirt that hugged Raja's muscular frame.The shirt was a vibrant fuchsia hue, adorned with tiny white polka dots that seemed to dance across the fabric. It was a far cry from Raja's previous attire, yet somehow, he pulled it off with effortless charm.Raja caught Kathir's gaze and smirked, clearly enjoying the effect his new look had on the flustered young man. He sauntered closer, the scent of his cologne mingling with the heady aroma of Kathir's own arousal.So, what do you think? Raja asked, spinning around to show off the shirt from every angle. Like it?

Kathir swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry as he took in the sight of Raja's provocative display. The pink shirt accentuated the man's broad shoulders and chiseled chest, making Kathir's pulse race with a mix of excitement and trepidation.I... uh... it looks great on you, Kathir managed to stammer, his eyes darting between Raja's face and the tantalizing expanse of skin revealed by the shirt's open collar.Raja chuckled, the sound low and husky. Glad you approve, he purred, closing the distance between them until they were mere inches apart. You know, I've always had a thing for pretty boys in pink. And you, my dear Kathir, are looking particularly delicious today.

Kathir's breath hitched as Raja's warm breath ghosted over his ear, sending shivers down his spine. He could feel the heat radiating off the other man's body, mixing with his own feverish desire.I... I don't understand what's happening to me, Kathir admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. These changes, these feelings... they're so intense, so overwhelming.Raja's hand came up to cup Kathir's cheek, his thumb stroking gently over the metal stud in his lower lip. Maybe that's because you're finally embracing your true self, he suggested, his eyes gleaming with a knowing intensity. Let go of your inhibitions, Kathir. Allow yourself to explore these newfound cravings.

Kathir's resolve crumbled under Raja's tender touch and persuasive words. With a shaky nod, he surrendered to the intoxicating sensations coursing through his veins.I want to, he breathed, his voice thick with longing. I want to experience everything, to discover who I really am.Raja's smile was triumphant as he leaned in, his lips hovering tantalizingly close to Kathir's. Then let's start with a kiss, shall we?Without waiting for a response, Raja claimed Kathir's mouth in a searing, passionate embrace. His tongue delved past Kathir's parted lips, exploring the warm depths of his mouth with confident strokes. Kathir moaned softly, melting into the kiss as his body responded eagerly to the stimulation.

[danlous]

"Armand is Alice and Daniel's wife/s and kids aren't real" has become a popular fan theory (even Luke Brandon Field said he liked it!) but i'd be surprised if it was right. I think it's definitely possible that Devil's Minion will be adapted in the show (though probably not exactly like in the books), but i personally think this whole imaginary family thing would be a poor way to handle the storyline for a variety of reasons. I think a twist like that would probably come across convoluted and (as Daniel might say) like something from a telenovela.

We see children's toys in Daniel's house and he's public figure who many people know with an autobiography and everything. Creating decades worth of false memories for Daniel and somehow also maintaining that imaginary life story for decades wouldn't be enough, Armand or whoever did it would also realistically have to have an absurd level of control over the physical world, public records and many other people's minds to sustain an illusion like that. I also frankly think it would be difficult to avoid having some sexist and biphobic undertones to the idea that Daniel's relationships with women were unreal and meaningless and only his relationship with a man matters.

However, the most important reason why i think Daniel's wives and children should be real is that they make him a richer, more nuanced character and are actually central to understanding him and his motives. He has lived a full and complex life that has been influenced and to some extent defined by his encounters with vampires, but those vampires still weren't his whole life. I think it's more interesting to see Daniel's human life and his relationship with Armand and Louis as something connected and overlapping that both affect each other. We actually learn quite a lot about Daniel from what he says about his partners and children.

This scene - as well as how Alice in general is discussed - reminded many people of how Daniel in the books talks about Armand, such as this famous passage:

Parallels between Daniel's relationships with Alice and Armand in the books are obvious but i think they're just that, parallels. Both the sweet little scene where Daniel is talking about Alice's eyebrows and the book scene where he's talking about loving Armand not despite but because he's a monster reflect in different ways who Daniel is as a person; he feels drawn to unconventional and strange and sees beauty where others might not. He ended up in this situation with vampires too because he wanted to interview people who're rejected by the society.

If Daniel already had some sort of relationship with Armand in the past it makes sense that it would be associated with Alice in his mind. There may be an overlap between the timelines of those relationships. A memory of Armand rises when Daniel is reminded of Alice rejecting his marriage proposal, in the books Armand rejected his wish to be turn him into a vampire, which would've been something akin to marriage. I think Alice being real is much more compelling for Armand's character too, with Armand expressing surprising understanding and sympathy toward Daniel's wife rather than just speaking about his own experience through an imaginary woman.

Completely putting aside Devil's Minion and is it a thing in the show or not, i think Daniel's family is particularly important to Louis' and Daniel's relationship. Something that hasn't technically been explicitly said but to me seems obvious is that Louis and Daniel strongly relate to each other as fathers. Many scenes where we see Louis and Daniel show vulnerability in front of each other have something to do with their partners and children. In 1.02 as one of the earliest examples of this Louis replicates the dessert Daniel had with Alice, trying to connect with him and his humanity through it, Daniel shares personal memory and they eat together in companionable silence.

I would argue that Claudia, her memory, and Louis' relationship with her is the heart of the story in these first two seasons. Claudia entering the story in 1.04 marks the shift in the interview and Daniel's approach; he becomes both more combative and more emotionally invested. He has a strong reaction to reading Claudia's diaries, and it's not difficult for any parent to guess that he's also imagining her own daughters in similar circumstances to Claudia.

I think this conversation at the end of the episode (alongside Louis' speech to Daniel in San Francisco and them remembering it in 2.05) is the most important scene between Louis and Daniel. They share the understanding what it feels like to have children and love them so much you don't even have words for it, but still fail them. It's not a coincidence that in the original interview in San Francisco what leads to Louis attacking Daniel is Louis telling the story of Claudia leaving alone and Louis going back to Lestat, and Daniel acting dismissively and clearly not understanding why this is so painful memory to Louis. Daniel was young, stupid and high - and he didn't have children yet. Daniel now wouldn't act like that when hearing this story, and he doesn't in 1.06 when hearing it again. And notably when Louis says that he would now agree to turn Daniel, Daniel says he doesn't want it anymore and specifically mentions his daughters as one of the reasons. Having to watch your children die before you is the most horrifying thing in the world. It's something Louis had to go through and Daniel wishes he never has to, even if vampirism still intrigues him.

Daniel realizes quickly that it all comes down to Louis' feelings of guilt and shame about failing Claudia and his inability to protect her, because he has similar feelings about his own daughters. Louis' story unravels in s1 finale because Daniel recognizes that Louis' more palatable narrative around what happened with Claudia isn't fully true. Daniel carefully read through Claudia's diaries and tried to learn to understand her, and he positions himself as someone who's trying to defend her integrity and reveal the injustice that was done to her. This is again about Daniel's own children as much as it's about Claudia. He knows that he's a bad father, his daughters don't talk to him anymore and it's implied that he neglected them when focusing on other things that interested him more. When Daniel defends Claudia he's on some level trying to rectify his own mistakes and when he calls Louis out he's also voicing his own self-loathing.

Eric Bogosian remarked that the scene in 2.01 where Louis cries and thanks for Daniel for helping him to remember that Claudia could dream is another shift in their dynamic. Daniel looks at Louis with genuine concern, and after that he tones down his usual sarcasm and jabs significantly. Daniel, again, can sympathize with how important this is for Louis. There's a new sincerity and empathy in their interactions. Sometimes the audience forgets that this story is ultimately about Claudia, but Daniel hasn't forgotten it since he first realized it. They're trying to understand together what happened to Louis' child and everything that led to it. I think if Daniel wasn't a father he would've acted differently, and Louis wouldn't have trusted him in the same way either and been able to share his and Claudia's story. I think this shared sorrow, love and guilt they feel as fathers is one of the most crucial parts of their connection.

[nabi-unveiled]

Sticking the Landing is Hard

It's no secret that I adore When It Rains, It Pours. I have written an immense amount about the symbols, characters, parallels, and interpretations of this show. I've taken a deep dive into almost every aspect of the show possible. The characters and narrative resonate DEEPLY for me. The fandom experience has been AMAZING.

At its core, it IS a show that has multiple interpretations. Many people will not like that aspect of it. I love it. I enjoy shows that make me think, that send me on symbol treasure hunts and prompt deep dives. But more importantly, I felt like a lot of its messages were true to real life. Did they ever like me? Did I actually like them? Why did I do that? Why did I stay? Why did I not say anything? When is a relationship over? These are all questions I have asked myself.

I think it's fine that I don't fully understand what each character is thinking. I've been with my husband for almost 20 years, and I still couldn't tell you even a majority of the time what he's thinking. Not with 100% confidence. So it doesn't bother me that we debate over whether Kaori really liked Hagiwara or not. There's a lot of ambiguity in life. Real life is messy, and people are complex and messy. It's tragically beautiful that way.

That said - sticking the landing is hard. In general, I dislike finales. NOT because the show is coming to an end like people inevitably lament on finale day. I started watching Asian series precisely because they DO end. But finale episodes tend to commit a lot of crimes. Pacing issues. Last minute plot arcs. Time skips. No plot at all. Unearned redemption. There's a LOT of ways that a finale can go wrong. Most of the time, a finale episode commits multiple crimes.

So if you absolutely adore When It Rains and only want to read positive vibes or do a deep dive on symbols/parallels, then let me direct you to this post here. That's where I talk about all of the things the finale got right. My finale wish list fared pretty well after all. There was a lot of good and quite a few unexpected treasures.

But that's not this post. Because even if you adore a show, you can have criticisms. I hold out hope, but I've yet to find a perfect show. If you're willing to entertain that kind of discourse, it's below the cut.

Since you've decided to keep reading, I'm going to assume you can handle me being straightforward. With criticism, I tend to be blunt. And just like I obsess over all of the positive details, I can nitpick with the best of them. It's a double-edged sword.

Now just because I notice something, doesn't mean it becomes a criticism. It depends on the show. For example, I noticed that Fadel/Bison never worried about fingerprints during their "murder" of Lilly. Do I care? NO! It's The Heart Killers. That's actually on brand.

In When It Rains, I expect things to be nuanced, layered, and realistic. That's the vibe it has carried thus far. It has been permeated with symbolism, parallels and callbacks. That's what I expect of it. The cheating will never bother me. People DO cheat. That's the story this tells. Even incredibly good people do things that are not "good" at times. I cast no stones.

And make no mistake - I'm INCREDIBLY happy that Sei/Hagiwara got their happy ending. But.....there were stumbles, a few missteps, and an outright (unforgivable) crime in the finale.

I'll start with the smallest criticisms and work my way up.

The Stumbles

Stumbles are what I call the small things that don't matter to most people but irk me. They can impact the narrative, but most of the time they don't.

Stumble #1 - Inaccurate Meteorology

Low air pressure would be a result of WARMER temperatures. Would it matter in most shows? Nope. The science nerd in me would be annoyed, but I'd move on. I'd treat it with the same nonchalance as Kant/Bison's magic tattoos. However, this show uses weather for symbolism. These details become more important. Plus, cold rain? Why are we getting cold rain now? Symbolically, it doesn't make sense. I can only hope it's a translation issue.

Stumble #2 - Forcing the Final Kiss

The show demanded a kiss in the rain. We got it. Yay! I'm glad we did. BUT...it felt forced. Like someone saying "You've gotta kiss now. the credits are almost done!" While there are a few narrative missteps that contributed, most of this feeling comes from the blocking.

The umbrella should've been used to pull Sei closer to kiss (like a tie), and THEN set aside while kissing. Symbolically, the umbrella HAD to go to the side. We needed them fully in the rain. But the way the umbrella was moved in this scene, made the movement of the umbrella feel contrived. For a show that's felt very real, it felt scripted. Therefore I enjoyed the scene a whole lot less than I would've otherwise. The smiles afterwards were still adorable. The ending shot is beautiful. The kiss in episode 5 is better. Feel free to disagree.

Stumble #3 - The Asylum Phone Case

If you want your symbols to mean something, you have to be consistent. There's meaning behind this painting. Basically, it represents being trapped. I didn't even have to bring it up, because so many other people did. If Sei has moved on and is no longer trapped, then the case should've changed. The phone was broke anyways. No need to keep it.

The Missteps

Missteps are my next level of criticism. These are the things that don't ruin a show, but they do hurt it. Finale episodes are notorious for missteps. Pacing and plot arc issues are most common.

Misstep #1 - Hagiwara deleting Sei's contact information

This action is supposed to parallel Sei deleting the rain app. However, it made sense that Sei deleted the rain app. He no longer needs the "fake rain". He's moving on to where he can hear the real rain. It's part of healing for him. It makes NO sense for Hagiwara to delete Sei's contact information. In fact, that's actually OUT of character for him.

I'm not surprised that he didn't contact Sei directly. I've pointed out before that Hagiwara is a mirror. He reflects what the other person wants, and we know he has a high level of respect for personal boundaries. However, Hagiwara waited patiently for a YEAR when his girlfriend wouldn't have sex with him. He KNOWS Sei has just went through something traumatic and is dealing with A LOT.

He couldn't wait a month before deleting him? At MOST, we're talking 1.5 months between when they had sex and reuniting at the museum. Most likely we're actually talking less than a month. Hagiwara would not have moved on that fast. He is not that complacent with Sei. I refuse to believe it. He's better than that (when he's with Sei).

Misstep #2 - The co-worker emailing Sei

The way this show does parallels and callbacks, Sei was required to be nominated to host the party.

After all, they told us that would happen in episode 2.

But notice what else they said there? That Sei would rely on Hagiwara when the time came. There was actually no good reason for the coworker to e-mail Sei after she left the room. It's unlikely behavior. Sei had already thought about reaching out to Hagiwara.

Party planning would have given him the excuse he needed to do it. Him sending an e-mail to Hagiwara would have shown more initiative and added just one more example that Sei actually did miss and want to be with Hagiwara. It would have also completed the parallel (since Hagiwara initiated e-mail the first time). He still could've received an automated response that Hagiwara was on leave and made a connection to the date of the museum closing. It's a missed opportunity to indicate the depth of Sei's feelings.

Misstep #3 - Pacing. Many people will take issue with the fact that our leads are only together the last few minutes. That doesn't bother me at all. I cut my teeth on BBC period pieces where you were lucky to get a three second handhold at the end of a six hour series. We saw all of the things that Sei & Hagiwara want to do with each other, and I know they'll continue their life afterwards.

However, there WAS a pacing issue. Notably, the whole encounter with Fujisawa and Sei took too long. That time would've been better spent showing more about Hagiwara adjusting to single life, Sei dealing with his trauma, them DRINKING COFFEE and/or them missing each other in general. I could think of a lot of things that would've better served than that long-ass conversation. Resolution needed to happen, but it shouldn't have taken 8.5 MINUTES of a 24 minute episode. For those curious, the resolution with Kaori took 6.5 minutes.

Misstep #4 - Sei is healed! The magic trauma wand got waved. This one would typically be a crime for me. It's a very common crime in dramaland. But there is wiggle room for some interpretation here. The biggest problem is time. Trauma takes TIME to heal, and we've had about a month.

Sei was still spiraling when washing his hands just a few episodes ago. He still refused to take transportation. But apparently, not only did the SA not causes issues, Sei's other issues are mostly gone.

Sei can now take whatever transportation necessary to make the long commute to Fujisawa's studio. Sei now makes insightful statements about how it can't be anyone's fault.

I had truly wanted Sei to make progress in healing. I'm glad he's wearing color. I'm glad he forgot the perfume. I'm glad he's reaching out to former friends. He still doesn't have LINE (maybe that WAS personal preference?). But we didn't get to see any of the things that helped him cope with the aftermath. A shot of Sei going into a therapists' office or trying to work up the nerve to get in a vehicle would've done wonders. Trauma has to be WORKED on. It doesn't magically disappear. Plus, the SA would have ADDED to the trauma.

The only reason this didn't land as an outright crime is because we don't know that he DIDN'T do those things either. We also don't REALLY know how far along he was in his healing process about his parents' death. We know he had made significant process over the years so it's possible that his trauma wasn't still as present as some earlier episodes implied (which would make those scenes a misstep).

THE CRIME: Character Assassination

Fujisawa's character now makes no sense. It's not that his character could be interpreted multiple ways. It's that it CAN'T be interpreted, because it's inconsistent.

I've went on a journey with Fujisawa's character. Back in episode 3 when I first started posting about this show, I delighted in the fact that there were no "bad guys". The show seemed to be about conflicting priorities which was a delightfully fresh take.

After multiple rewatches and episode 4, I had decided that I had missed the plot. Fujisawa WAS a bad news bear. No problem. We now had one story about mismatched priorities and one about manipulation/control. Still important stories to tell.

Then came episode 6. I haven't read the novel, but I know what happened there. Doesn't matter to me. I base my analysis strictly on the show. I knew people interpreted the SA/dubcon scene different ways. I had even received an inquiry about whether I thought Fujisawa had raped Sei. I had prepared a (long) answer. I was 100% confident that Fujisawa HAD raped Sei. I went through all of the pacing, the blocking, the parallels, etc. comparing the scene to the fantasy scene in episode 1 and the sex scene with Hagiwara. There are a LOT of parallels. Add in several points of both Fujisawa's and Sei's dialogue, and I had NO DOUBT that it was rape.

However, I decided to hold off just in case there would be additional evidence in episode 7. We hadn't had resolution after all. We knew Sei would confront Fujisawa. And NOW? I can't post it. Going STRICTLY by what the show presented, I can no longer be 100% confident.

To be clear, I actually have NO issue with Sei's response to Fujisawa. Adding in the new information that they had been best friends since they were KIDS clarified a lot of Sei's dependence on him.

Sei had put up with and excused Fujisawa's behavior for SO LONG, that it actually makes sense he would find a way to excuse and forgive Fujisawa again. In some ways, he needed to do that for himself. As an audience, we may not like it. But it's realistic. People forgive and overlook the actions of their abusers all the time.

I also have no problem with the "reveal" that Fujisawa had always liked Sei in a sexual way. The show had already told us it was coming.

Even the symbols told us that Fujisawa was actually more sexually responsive than Kaori. He didn't eat the yogurt. He drank coffee.

Fujisawa's feelings of guilt track. It's not my culture, but I've watched Asian media for over 20 years. Being involved in ANY way with the death of parent(s) ALWAYS causes complications. And note - Sei didn't say that it wouldn't have mattered. He said that Fujisawa could have kept quiet and just let them live happily.

Now, I'm great with messy, complicated characters. But messy (i.e. layered/complex) and inconsistent are different things. Here's the problem. Fujisawa gracefully bowing out and letting Sei live on his own? That's inconsistent with what we've been taught about him. Codependency, a moment of rage resulting in a terrible event, and regret over his actions resulting in them parting ways? This resolution WOULD'VE worked with my initial impression of Fujisawa. It would've made for a complex, messy, and realistic character if we had stuck with the initial characterization. Even the guilt would've worked.

However, this resolution DOESN'T work with everything we've been shown in the last few episodes. Fujisawa has been depicted as someone carefully cutting Sei off from his friends, as someone who controlled almost every aspect of Sei's life from what he wore to what he ate to where he went. "Letting go" doesn't match the person who was going to whisk Sei away to the countryside for daring to talk with another man. That type of behavior? It doesn't go away even if the person regrets their actions. If that's Fujisawa, then the show basically gave up realism to tie up the ending with a pretty bow. "We need you to go away now so that the leads can be happy."

So...we have two versions of Fujisawa. One where Fujisawa/Sei were equally codependent in a relationship that worked for neither. And one where Fujisawa was a controlling abuser. The evidence conflicts. I've frequently said in this show that things "could be both" and that "both interpretations worked". However, these two versions ARE mutually exclusive. He can't be both. So either the crime was in the finale or....there were missteps all along the way.

[itsfunnybcuzitstrue]

i can't remember whether all of this is in the 2020 edited version of solitaire, but in the og version tori says:

"Last night I watched a film called Garden State. Not all of it, but most of it. [...] It’s about this guy Andrew, and you’re never quite sure whether Andrew’s life is truly depressing or not. It seems like he has no decent friends or family, but then he meets this girl (typically happy- go-lucky, quirky, and beautiful Manic-Pixie-Dream-Girl Natalie Portman, of course) who teaches him how to live properly again. [...] It’s very obvious that Zach Braff (who wrote, directed, acted, and compiled the soundtrack) created this film about himself. Maybe that’s what made it so real to me."

and i can't stop thinking about how much this parallels solitaire.

'it’s about this guy Andrew, and you’re never quite sure whether Andrew’s life is truly depressing or not.' -> tori is an unreliable narrator so we experience everything in heightened and/or sensationalised way

'It seems like he has no decent friends or family, but then he meets this girl (typically happy- go-lucky, quirky, and beautiful Manic-Pixie-Dream-Girl Natalie Portman, of course) who teaches him how to live properly again.' -> in solitaire tori is not on good terms with any of her friends and has a fairly hostile relationship with her parents, then she meets michael who appears to be happy-go-lucky (but he's much more complex)

'It’s very obvious that Zach Braff (who wrote, directed, acted, and compiled the soundtrack) created this film about himself. Maybe that’s what made it so real to me.' -> this could be a stretch, but alice has said multiple times that she chanelled the emotions she felt when writing solitaire into the book, and that she found this to be very cathartic- and it's this reason that so many people love solitaire, seeing tori experiece all this comforts them

whether alice did this intentionally or not she's a genius

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

coney island x mbobhft

WHAT A COMPLETE SHOCK I WONDER WHAT INSTIGATED THIS /ijbol

Sorry for putting you on blast friend but also this is a very unique experience we share 😂

Ah, London N6, a night that will live in infamy for many reasons, not the least of which being IT WAS RARE WE WERE THERE WE REMEMBER IT ALL TOO WELL.

As many of you will know (and @claudiajcregg literally witnessed next to me as I mouthed WHAT THE FUCK), this is the mashup that broke my brain because it made my third eye open in the rafters of fuckass Wembley Stadium.

Warning: this is going to be a very long one because I am far too personally invested in it 😂

(It's so interesting seeing it from this angle head-on given that we were behind the stage 😂 I don't think I've ever seen it properly lol.)

First of all, My Boy was one of those songs that I loved as a bop when TTPD came out, but then when the voice memo version was released last summer (iirc a few weeks before this?) it made the song click even more pointedly because it made it infinitely sadder (and clearer and maybe confirmed my own inklings but anyway). Looking over my blog archives the day it was released is a trip because it can just be summed up as: IT'S SO FUCKING SAD! The idea that someone who you considered your closest confidant also being the one to help break you into a million more pieces? Devastating! "It sounds sad because I'm sad in general," ugh. But I digress.

Then you have Coney Island, which is where I confess that despite evermore being my favourite album, the song was one I didn't particularly gravitate towards. It's beautiful! It's evocative! It just wasn't one that like, permeated my consciousness all that much. It was one of those "wow she's sure telling a sad story with pretty words" type of things. Until, of course, she combined it with My Boy to maximize their joint slay that wrecked my brain and made me reconsider BOTH of them.

OK ENOUGH BACKSTORY LET'S GET TO THE PLOT 😂

Should've known it was only a matter of time, my boy only breaks his favourite toys... Break my soul in two, looking for you but you're right here, and if I can't relate to you anymore, then who am I related to? I loooooooove that transition! Again, one of the fun parts of the mashups that has become more evident as I've been on this exercise is that sometimes you can see the "hook" lyrically of what makes her craft the mashup. Here, it's the break toys/break my soul parallel.

And I *think* this might have been the point at which my brain went WAIT WHAAAAAAAAAAT in real time lmao. Again, I don't know why Coney Island never quite rooted itself in my brain, although thinking back on it, I do wonder if the fact that it's a duet played a role in that; as someone who tends to gravitate towards melody/sound before lyrics, maybe the fact that it's split between Matt Berninger and Taylor just made the story "split" in my brain? I don't know, but Taylor playing it on her own on the piano somehow made it click haha.

So back to the story of the mashup: You have the start of the story about the a cycle of depression (voices in his head), resentment (only breaks his favourite toys) and lashing out (I'm queen of sandcastles he destroys). And the cycle is on both parts tbh (sickest army doll/rivulets descend my plastic smile). It's a contrast to the early days of the relationship, where she felt like they were something special (but you should have seen him when he first got me/it fit too right, puzzle pieces in the dead of night), even though reality would set in and destroy it.

So then enter Coney Island, where she/the narrator is saying: you keep breaking me because you're pulling away from me (ostensibly because of said cycle) and I don't know why. You used to be the person I relied on the most in this world, and now I feel like half of me is drifting away. (At least, that's how I read "break my soul in two.") Like, this person is still physically there, but in every other respect, they're a million miles away. (Looking for you, but you're right here.) You used to be my everything, my other half, but if you're now pulling away from me, how am I supposed to exist in this world without you? (if I can't relate to you, then who am I related to?)

So admittedly this is where the duet vs. solo gets complicated in the narrative lol and I'm probably going to contradict myself just as a warning. But the theme from the start of My Boy is totally reflected in, "If this is the long haul, how did we get here so soon? Did I close my fist around something delicate, did I shatter you?" Again, the idea of: this was supposed to be our forever, yet it seems like we have just hit the beginning of the end. Was it something I did? Did I break you the way you've broken me? Is that why I'm in so much pain? IT'S SO SAD. (And again: is not only very similar to the theme of My Boy, but IMO of TTPD in general.)

The chorus of Coney Island is what this mashup REALLY illuminated for me: The idea of remembering the good times at a spot that used to be yours together, and wondering how the hell you lost sight of each other (lol) and ended up here, broken and alone. "Sorry for not making you my centrefold, over and over" is so ouchie because if it's the narrator singing that, it could almost be a little resentful, like, "I made you the centre of my universe, sorry I couldn't keep doing it again," but if it's the subject, it's like, "sorry I could never prioritize you the way you did me," and either way it's SAD.

"Lost again with no surprises, disappointments close your eyes and it gets colder as the sun goes down," REALLY got me, because it's just so resigned! Like, you keep expecting things to get better, but they don't, and you're just continually disappointed and floored with every setback. There's no grand gesture, no magic cure to save the day, everything just wilts and fades away. "It gets colder and colder as the sun goes down," is just like... all the life in your home and your relationship bleeding out like, well, death by a thousand cuts.

The bridge of Coney Island finally really hit me here because it's like the promise of youth being completely replaced by the jadedness of adulthood. "Were you waiting at our old spot in the tree line by the gold clock, did I leave you hanging every single day?" to me just feels like: I knew you were waiting for me [to join you-- and IMO that's a metaphor for "you were waiting for me to be ready for our plans"], but I kept stalling and with every day that I stalled I hurt you even more. Obviously this may be reading too much into it, but I could make a case for the "old spot by the tree line" being a stand-in for a familiar beloved space (e.g. home) and the gold clock being a stand-in for counting down to life plans that had once been on a timeline that no longer were. But this is getting deep into literary analysis instead of a walk down memory lane with the mashup itself 😂 Anyhoo this just gave me more thoughts about another song but we are not going there on main.

And of course, "did I paint your bluest skies the darkest gray a universe away" ties into so much of what we hear on TTPD (and imo much of rep through Midnights too), but also calls back to "here we go again, the voices in his head call the rain to end our days of wild," in the My Boy intro of this mashup. Like I said, this is where the duet vs. solo gets complicated if you're looking at it from a performance point of view here 😂 but it makes sense to me. (And to borrow from twitter brain rot, it fits my narrative.) But, this person drifting away emotionally and taking it out on her (a universe away) completely tears her world apart and turns her world into sadness in kind. (Which: again, is the theme of My Boy too.)

And maybe my favourite part of the mashup, thematically and sonically because it brings it all together:

When I got into the accident, the sight that flashed before me was your face, but when I walked up to the podium, I think that I forgot to say your name... but just say when I'd play again, he was my best friend down at the sandlot, I felt more when he played pretend than with all the Kens, cause he took me out of my box, stole my tortured heart, left all these broken parts, told me I'm better off, but I'm not.

It's this idea of: this person loves you more than anything (e.g. your face being the first they see when their life flashes before their eyes), but being unable to show you that kind of love and taking you for granted in spite of it (forgot to say your name). Like, I'd die for you, but I still can't be there for you. THAT IS HEAVY. (Yes, complicated by duet/solo, no, I don't care.) And in spite of it all, I would have still tried again! (And she did, ahem.) Because even when you hurt me, I still loved you more than anyone else! This love felt like it was worth more than the pain it caused, even when I was denying how much it was hurting me! I somehow believed you every time, but I know it was killing me. OOF.

(I could say "told me I'm better off, but I'm not," sounds like "You swore that you loved me, but where were the clues?" but I don't mean to veer into muse discourse because the mashup stories stand alone on their own etc.)

In the end, it comes down to "he saw forever, so he smashed it up." If you're looking at it as one full story, My Boy is like the context about the dark place they both find themselves in, and Coney Island fills in the lines about how said boy broke said favourite toy, little by little, until it turns into the destructive force you find in My Boy that leaves her in pieces to pick up on her own. And this is a case where the mashup really deepened my understanding of BOTH songs! Coney Island wasn't just a tale of fading love in the backdrop of the place of childhood dreams, it's a whole metaphor for a shared life disintegrating. And while I got the themes of My Boy instantly, pairing it with a song that's a little more grounded in reality kind of highlights the darkness behind the toy box conceit even further. My Boy sets the stage for the fallout from mental health and personal struggles, and Coney Island shows how that happens.

As an aside, she does some incredible things vocally in this mashup, and the way she belts out "I'm not" repeatedly is one of them! The power! The emotion! Master class in using your voice as a tool to tell a story! From the first quiet "I'm not," to the final angry one, it is a journey!!!

Thank you so much for this bestie!!!! It took me literal hours but it was worth it 😂 Aaah August 2024 you will always be famous.

(And for everyone else: we are still on a moratorium for mashup madness asks because I still have too many to go through lol. I will let y'all know when I am accepting requests again!)

[darethshirl]

Arranged Marriage AU, Lucanis & Illario angst

The cravat choked at him.

It shouldn't have; it was made from top-of-the-line antivan silk, Lucanis well knew, the fabric breezy and smooth against the skin. He'd touched it before. Weeks ago, in the mansion's cavernous antechamber, with the merchant obsequiously sweating under Caterina's crow-sharp gaze. A rainbow parade of swatches spread out for Lucanis's perusal, from velvety black to sentimental lilac. He was supposed to pick the colour.

Such an inconsequential choice, a mean and pointless allowance of freedom. Lucanis, self-hating, had grasped at it like a man drowning.

Now that same sky-blue cloth swirled over Illario's fingers, his dexterous movements tying up the knot like the most delicate of nooses. Lucanis stared at his cousin's face, so close to his he could map each tiny mole doting the man's left cheek. Illario ignored him—or perhaps was simply focused on his task. His gaze was downcast, his eyelashes dark and delicate against his cheekbones.

"There," Illario said, finishing up with a flourish. "The perfect groom." He looked up at Lucanis, his mouth curling up in a teasing smirk. "Now all we need to fix is his attitude."

"Hm."

"Smile, Lucanis. It's not that hard. See?" Illario gestured at his face, and all at once the mask was on: pearly white teeth on a wide slash of a smile, a warm, coy light dancing in his eyes. A smile that enticed, rejoiced, invited one to join in the joke. Even his crow's feet crinkled, for added sincerity. Lucanis stared, expressionless and a little helpless, unable as always to figure out the magic behind the trick.

"I don't need to smile," Lucanis said instead, too gruff. "It's not like either of us have a choice in the matter."

Illario sighed. "You're acting like you're marrying an ogre. I've seen your bride-to-be, you know." He smoothed the thin fabric of Lucanis's shirt like a fussy mother, tweaking golden buttons that didn't need any straightening. "Quite the beauty. Full cheeks, full lips. Rich black hair down to her waist. Gorgeous, really."

"You marry her then."

"Oh, I would."

And it was said as a joke—it was always said as a joke, the rhythm of their childhood rivalry, their benign competition—but the more they grew the more the undercurrent deepened, grew sharp edges. Turned treacherous. Lucanis met Illario's eyes and felt the weight of all they left unsaid, the mutual understanding forged through their common, if parallel, life path. Then Illario's expression turned opaque, his eyes shuttering behind the mask, and Lucanis could no longer read him.

Illario turned away. "Come on. The First Talon can't be late to his own wedding."

But Lucanis stayed rooted to the spot, struggling with his thoughts, with an elusive emotion that would have made his eyes smart if he'd let it. "Illario—if I could—"

"Stop."

Tension wracked their silence, the muscles on Illario's back. Lucanis waited, and clenched his fists, and couldn't breathe.

Then Illario exhaled—Lucanis felt it in his own lungs, like a taut line suddenly cut—and just like that the world made sense again. Illario looked over his shoulder, and this time he had his real smile on, small and playful and a little bit mean. "Look, if you need an exit strategy, just give the signal and I'll plunge a dagger in her heart. I'm not even kidding, I'd do it."

Lucanis laughed despite himself, a quiet huff that warmed him up from the inside out. "Thanks," he said, and meant it.

[deeranger]

Sam letting Dean suck on his breasts to calm him down when he is mad or angry is so real… It also makes perfect sense because in canon Dean misses Mary a lot and Sam is so much like their mother (save me Sam/Mary parallels save me). Dean definitely has memories of her, he probably sees her in Sam sometimes.

Oooh..... Oh. Mommy kink, anyone? 😏

"Yeah, that's it, just let me—" Dean babbles, cutting himself off with a moan when his lips close around Sam's nipple. His little brother has barely had the time to properly open his shirt, but Dean's already shoving his face in there, eager and so damn riled up that he's hyperventilating. It doesn't take many seconds before teeth graze the tender flesh either, any restraint and finesse forgotten long ago.

"Oww, s-slow down," Sam gasps, but there's a small smile tugging on his lip despite the pain. Dean whines in response, a high-pitched noise stuck in his throat as he suckles, tongue lapping greedily at the hardened nub.

"M'right here, De.... Not going anywhere," Sam adds, voice shaky, as Dean eagerly palms his other tit, strong fingers squeezing it like he'll never let go.

"Hmmm," Dean just mumbles, his hot mouth leaving smears of saliva to cool everywhere on the tanned skin. By now, he's so hard in his jeans that it looks downright painful, and Sam's no better off. There's no way either of them is going to last long. Every few seconds their hips involuntarily twitch, small stutters that they don't quite manage to conceal, but right now there's really no need to hide it. Not now, not anymore. They're too far gone for that.

"Oh, God...." Sam grunts when his big brother nips at him, only to let go of his nipple with a loud and vulgar pop. It's nothing short of pornographic, and as Dean stares up at him through dark lashes, the younger Winchester can't help a moan falling from his lips, raw and blatantly wanton. As he sits there on the edge of the motel bed, Dean looks so small between his legs, so.... Devoted. And the way he's leaning into Sam, just clinging to him like his life depends on it, it's making every fiber of him want to relieve the pressure building in his groin. But he can't. Oh, he can't.

"Please, can I just....?" Dean asks, and he sounds wrecked. Both his hands are now on Sam's tits, squeezing them together like they're actually big enough for it. Like Dean has done a million times with the bar skanks he'll pick up at night. Only, Sam's chest is firm and muscular, not at all as supple as the various C cups he usually gets his hands on. It's not the same. Oh, but it's Sam. And he's so warm and beautiful, endless planes of golden skin, smooth under his calloused fingertips. It's like he can even feel the heartbeat underneath it, just thrumming away in a strong jackrabbiting rhythm that perfectly matches his own. It's intoxicating. It's safe, it's home. And it's so much like her.

"Fuck..." Dean says, the word punching out of him in a breathless moan. As his fingers pinch and caress and squeeze, his eyes never leave Sam's face. God, he's beautiful. And he has Mary's eyes. Shit, he even has her smile.

By now there's a wet patch forming on the denim fabric of his jeans, and Dean can't help but grind himself against the side of the mattress. Sparks zap up his spine as he does, and a loud moan tumbles out of him.

"Oh, God, I n-need... I need to..." he whimpers, dark green eyes laser-focused on Sam's lips while he humps the edge of the bed.

"You can have whatever you want, De- just- take whatever you want," Sam babbles in return, hips twitching and mouth open as his brother squeezes his chest. The coil in Dean's groin tightens, the heat there flaring up in an instant by Sam's words. It's like a goddamn flip of a switch. And without hesitation, he's suddenly hauling himself off the floor and into Sam's lap knees digging into the bed on either side of him with a protesting squeal of the metal springs in the cheap mattress.

There's no more hesitation. No more second thoughts. There's simply no room for it anymore, and Dean's mouth crashes against Sam's in a wild frenzy of clacking teeth and prodding tongues. It's primal, and there's something so unique in the way Sam tastes, something that sets Dean's groin alight. He tastes like cinnamon and raspberries and coffee, like something long forgotten, like everything Dean ever missed... He tastes like friggin mother's milk.

A pitiful mewling sound spills from Dean's mouth, desperate and so, so hungry. He almost sounds like he's hurt, and he's pawing at Sam now, big hands roaming everywhere to squeeze and tug and pinch like he can't get close enough. He's almost there. Shit. He's almost there, he's so, so close but still just too far away to slip over the edge, that fire blazing in his groin and in his mind and everywhere, like he's going mad with it, like he's friggin dying from it, and his dick fucking hurts and—

"M-Mommy..." he whimpers into Sam's mouth, mind a whirl and body ablaze. He can feel Sam tense, feel the way he stiffens ever so slightly, insecure surprise making his large body go extra taut under him. But it's only for a second. Just a second, as scary and fleeting as a ghost. And then, Sam relaxes once more, delves deeper into the messy kiss with a throaty groan of his own. There's even a stuttering roll of his hips, eager and clumsy, and then they're suddenly grinding together, denim against denim. It's rough and the angle is weird, but it's everything Dean ever wanted. It's electrifying. And while they breathe each other's breath, tongues lapping and swirling and tangling, Sam whispers into his brother's mouth:

"It's okay, baby boy... I've got you."

The reaction is instant. Dean groans against Sam's lips, hips thrusting and grinding against his little brother's crotch, seeking release, touch, anything, just more, more more. The fire in his groin feels searing, like it's lapping at his spine, scalding tendrils shooting through his abdomen and spreading like wildfire. He's right at the edge, the point of no return rushing past him so fast that he's forgetting how to breathe.

"Please—" he manages to choke out, but it bleeds into a helpless moan before he can finish it. It seems that Sam knows exactly what he wants though, because suddenly a big hand drops to the bulge in Dean's pants, long fingers rubbing at him through the denim:

"Come on, baby... Let mommy take care of you," Sam whispers, low and throaty into Dean's mouth.

And that's all it takes.

With a whimper, Dean shoots hot and messy inside his jeans, hips jerking in cramp-like thrusts against Sam's hand. It's as clumsy as it is mindless, both of them writhing against each other. It's animalistic. The sounds they make easily rival the dirtiest porn flick, and Dean's mind is reeling with want and more and Mary and Sam, Sam, Sam. It's everything Dean ever wanted and everything he should never have. Oh, but it's beautiful. It's perfect. And he's finally home.

[biblioflyer]

Being right doesn’t mean you get to kill everyone else.

I’ve seen some griping that the writers of X-Men ‘97 “did Magneto dirty” by first showing how human / mutant coexistence was a delusion only to have Magnus go full genocidal tyrant. I think this, like the exchange between Rogue and Captain America has nuances that aren’t being appreciated, but I’ll grant the point that the demographic disparity and the destructive capabilities of the setting ensure that it doesn’t take broad support by non-mutants to enact a pogrom. Even before the revelation of Bastion, the idea of an attempt to kill as many mutants in one place as physically possible and ruin the illusion of safety wasn’t that far fetched: with or without the support and sanction of major world governments.

That Magneto would respond to the Genosha massacre with disproportionate force, and let’s call it what it is: killing humanity including quite a lot of mutants, is not the writers turning on Magneto. It’s who Magneto is in the animated series and at the moment in comic lore it’s based on. Who Magneto is is a mutant supremacist. Separation from Sapiens was never just about safety. Magneto wanted to build a parallel culture. Not for the sake of creating a culture and the beauty of creative endeavors but because of mutant chauvinism.

Because the setting is what it is, Charles the assimilationist is doomed. If the rubric for success is mutant safety and equality across the board, then it’s simply unachievable because tiny cabals of madmen can cobble together salvaged alien tech, secrets from the future, and knock off Stark tech to unleash horror that is obscenely difficult to prevent and doesn’t require widespread societal consent.

Charles chooses not to blame the people just trying to live day to day for the actions of hate filled mad scientists and lynchers.

Magneto blames the masses for not recognizing and stopping the threat in their midst, sees their inaction as complicity, and even if they are blameless then they are camouflage within which existential threats to mutants conceal themselves and if Magneto has to burn down the whole village or planet to deny genocidal schemers their cover, that’s what he’ll do. He’ll kill as many non-mutants as it takes to feel safe because he did not value their lives prior to Genosha, did not feel they valued mutant lives, and he has always viewed mutant lives as more valuable. Genosha ratcheted that up to genocidal rage.

Revolutionary, terrorist, oppressed, and oppressor are not static categories. Real life figures and fictional characters can slide between them very easily because monsters can make valid points and victims can do monstrous things. A correct observation about society doesn’t justify the monster’s darkest desires and suffering doesn’t make evil deeds justified.

That’s the point. That’s always been the point of X-Men. It’s not cops and robbers, bigots vs good people, it’s the struggle of everyone not to judge everyone else by the worst thing a member of the other group has ever done. Magneto and Bastion are the faces of giving in to rage and fear. Succumbing to the easy moral certainty of collective punishment and of the rationalizations provided by their respective supremacies. They always were. Even when they were making sense. Especially when they were making sense.

Epilogue: (Tolerance is Extinction pt 3 spoilers)

It’s never too late though to step off the path of the tyrant. Better early but late is better than never.