#but then when I started writing I just made all these new connections and associations

[86espresso]

secrets i have held in my heart, are harder to hide than i thought ✯ jh86

sum: “I really like you.” *looks around* “are you sure-”

// jack x med student

warnings: 18+, oral (f & m receiving), mentions of familial neglect, cursing, kissing, stress, anxiety, doubt, pet tigers, jack thinking too hard, reader is insecure don’t know what for 💔, overuse of commas because im insane, happy ending, a lil too sappy (i say this with emphasis), i mean it there’s a whole lotta CHEESE, mostly fluff, very emotional and hearty pls im sorry im a lover. afab!reader w/ she/her pronouns :)

w/c; 7.6k

a/n: hey so yeah. wtf. the word count?? i had so much fun writing this. half scared that its boring. i love simp / munch jack. ps: as queen as y/n is, i gave reader a nickname, sorry. (a very … unique nickname. i myself am puzzled as to how my brain works) enjoy. or at least try to. under the cut !

THE library was unsurprisingly almost empty considering the fact that no sane person would want to step outside in this rainstorm, so you were content in studying organic chemistry in the very back, alone with your thoughts, your textbooks, folklore by Taylor Swift, and now a guy. Who decided that he will break the silence in the almost empty library.

You were in your world, as always, not really connecting or associating with things around you but the ruckus of the someone knocking over an umbrella stand and profusely apologizing to apparently no one made you lift your head up. You smile slightly before going back to your work, barely registering your surroundings. 

Sure, Jack was entirely focused on his friends, studies, and hockey back in high school, but he was an expert at faces and names and could jot down absolutely anyone that he knows he’s seen before. He knew exactly who the girl with dark circles and way-too-oversized hoodie in the back was. 

At least five minutes later, Jack started hovering near your spot, which was the romance aisle. You sneak a glance at him and take note of his athletic shorts and New York Giants hoodie and quickly denote that this man was definitely not the romance novel type (or maybe book type at all). After flipping mindlessly through another book he lets out a soft “fuck it” before turning to face you completely. 

You can’t help but crack a smile at his jump when he saw that you had already been staring at him with wide, voidfull eyes. 

A pause. You staring at him. Him staring at you. He cracks a dopey smile, blinding you with his paper white teeth, and pulls up a chair in front of you. 

“What’s up, Dee?” He asks holding his hand up for a dap. Bewildered at how this complete stranger knows your nickname amongst close friends (from when you gracefully told people that ‘the bags under your eyes are Dior’), you dap him back anyway and blurt, “I have never seen you before.”

“You went to my high school. We worked in a project in like, AP World I think? I dunno. But I remember you saved my grade that whole year.”

Your mind remains blank. You saved a lot of people’s grades. 

“My only high school memories are countless APs, pain, suffering, studying and depression.” 

Most people would blanch at your dreamy straightforwardness, but Jack just grinned again. 

“Yeah, I remember you were always tired but also really funny. And tired. Deja Vu, man, watching you sit here, laser focused on your books. I was on the hockey team, if that helps.”

I furrow my brows, thinking hard. 

“I do remember that our hockey guys were really good. They would announce their names like every day on the speakers because they won all the time.” 

Jack groans at the memory. He was well known but it was just uncomfortable having your last names called out where the whole school could hear. 

You laugh at his reaction. “They would call the same names over and over. I don’t know if it was you who used to hide your face every time they did it but yeah.”

Jack perked up. “Yeah that was me.” 

You take a moment to admire his boyish facial features and athletic build. He’s pretty. 

‘Don’t even think about it’ pretty. 

“Dang. You were like a superstar. Sorry I don’t remember much. I’m like, walking jet lag.” 

He laughs a typical frat boy laugh (if that makes sense) and you like it. You want to hear it again. 

“So, what are you doing out here? Never pegged you for a big city girl.” 

“I go to college here.”

“Damn, we should’ve met sooner. My name is Jack, by the way.” 

“My friends call me Dee, but I guess you knew that.”

You were left pondering as to why a hockey player from high school was even anticipating meeting you; people only approached you for notes and the occasional party invitation back then.

“So, uh- what about you? Make it big in the league thingy yet?” 

He breaths a laugh. “You could say that.”

“Who do you play for?” 

“New Jersey.”

“Prudential, isn’t it? That’s close by my apartment.” I say in thought. 

Jack grins. “Really? We might bump into each other often, then.” 

He looks genuinely excited. 

Why. 

What’s going on. 

You chat for a few more minutes but it’s mostly you saying out of pocket things and Jack laughing instead of side-eyeing you and walking away. You were surprised at his effortless kindness. 

“Phone.”

“Hm?”

“Or Snap? Whatever you feel like is best,” he says, pulling out his phone. It takes a second to register that he’s implying that you exchange contact information. 

“Don’t really use Snapchat. I kinda have too much on my plate right now.” You hand over your phone. 

“You always overwork yourself, you should be at the club. You’ll die on the inside.” 

“Nothing I can’t handle, I hope.”

You just need to push through and never ever have fun.

He checks the time and sighs. 

“I was just here to return a book but I gotta head back. Flight for a roadie takes off in a couple hours. I’ll be back in, like, four days? I hope to see you around then?” 

You match his soft smile and nod, whatever roadie means but okay. It was actually nice, wasting some valuable study time for a potential friend. He’s cool. 

“Yeah. See you.” You offer and huff a laugh as he reaches out to dap you up again. 

That night, after yet another long and winding day with the only highlight being meeting someone who was apparently a high school acquaintance, you decide to look him up. Surprised at the absolute famethat this man had loaded, your lips parting at every detail, you click on his instagram and officially unhinge your jaw. 

500k followers? 

You’re never on insta but that can’t be good. 

The shock of how you basically were bonding with someone who definitely downplayed how famous he was didn’t wear off a week later; he texted you quite often and you tried to text back without seeming dry. 

It was nearly a week later when he offered to meet up again. 

-> two questions

babies come from the baby store.

-> wtf 

sorry. ask away !

-> 1. are you at the library rn

do you still like the caramel frappe from dunkin

yes. and yes. what the hell are you doing. 

-> something nice. see u soon angel. 

angel is wild when I look like I snuck on this earth but thanks for that anyways. you’re very kind :))

-> kind enough to tell you to that you’re really pretty :))

*reacted with heart emoji*

You check your forehead temperature to make sure you hadn’t just imagined the whole conversation. 

It wasn’t long before Jack was strutting into the library with two dunkin’ shakes in his hands accompanied by his gorgeous smile when he spotted you in the back, once again. 

“You’re wearing glasses today.” He says when you look up at his outstretched hand. You reach forward with a grateful smile, and deja vu hits you hard. The same exact scene playing out in high school when he had asked everyone in some group project their favorite drinks and treated them when they all got an A. 

“I remember you,” you say as he flopped on the bean bag next to you with his own drink. 

“Yeah? I knew you would. You’re too smart.” He says, again dazzling you with his perfect smile as he lifts two fingers to tap your temple softly to emphasize his point. It’s a challenge to tear your eyes away from his baby blues. 

“Your eyes are so blue. It’s distracting.” 

Jack’s eyes widen at your unintentional rebuttal at his subtle flirting, and he smirks. He knew that you weren’t aware that you were being flirted with the past week; what you lacked in emotional and social intelligence was shadowed by your sharpness in academics. 

“Hey, you didn’t tell me you were a really big deal around here? Everyone knows you and you have like a million followers.”

“Stalking me?” 

“Educating myself.”

Jack laughs and throws as arm around you to peer over your shoulder. 

“Well, I don’t just go around telling people how good I am. So, whatcha doing?” 

The contact makes you freeze up and once again the surreality of a man wanting to spend time with you disorients you a little bit.

“Watching porn.” 

Jack laughs again and earns a stern look from the clerk down the aisle. 

“I’m studying anatomy.”

“Yeah, didn’t suspect any less than med school for your smartass.” 

You turn to him to talk back but his face was inches away from you and that sets off alarm bells throughout your body. You’ve had your fair share of guys and girls but there was not a single string attached and the short flings were easy to forget. 

But having someone that pretty, that close to you, not showing exactly what intentions he had? That caused your anxiety to spike. Positively. 

“Your face is really close.” You simply state, pushing your large frames higher up your nose. 

“And yours is really red.” 

You immediately press your hands against your cheeks and groan at what you picture your face looks like. Jack just giggles again and pulls your hands away. 

“It’s cute.” 

His hands are still on your wrists. 

“It really isn’t, but thank you. You’re very kind.”

There’s a beat of silence where you can see the gears in his head turning. 

“Do you like aquariums?”

You surprise yourself and Jack when you pull him into a hug as a greeting outside the aquarium.

The feel of your chests touching with little fabric in between set Jack’s heart off racing and the way your curves dipped at your hips had him pulling at his collar. 

But most of all, when he pulled back from the hug, he noticed you were wearing shorts that had your legs all out for him to ogle over. 

“You hidin’ all that?” He scans your figure, noting the dark, low cut, full sleeve top. 

“What? All this?” You say as you push your tits together. “There’s not much to hide.”

Jack’s throat runs dry. Unfortunately for him, he’s still a guy and tits still make him drool. And the fact that you had no idea you were keeping him on his toes 

“Be for real.” He rolls his eyes. “How’d your day go?” 

“Nice, actually. I just took Nala for a walk and-“ you cut yourself off. 

“I didn’t know you had a pet? Can I see her? I love anim-“

“She’s a tiger.” 

You give him more and more reasons everyday as to why him hanging out with you was unethical and strange but he seemed to keep on staying. Studying you as if intrigued by your strangeness. 

“You- have a pet..tiger?” 

Yeah. I’ve done it.

“I- yeah.” 

It seems like all Jack ever does is grin because he’s doing it again and flinging an arm around your shoulder as he starts to walk with you. 

“Oh, Dee. There’s just so much to learn and love about you.” 

It takes you a second to react. 

“That may be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“You serious?” 

“Yeah. Well, cause I was ugly growing up, and people always thought I was strange. It’s hard to imagine that people are genuinely interested in any sort of friendship with me.” 

Jacks fingertips on your bare collarbone, his cologne and aftershave, his figure pressed against your side; all of it was overtaking your senses.  

“Baby, why do you think I walked up to you that day in the first place? You may not remember much but I do. You were so kind and honest. And so intriguing. And hardworking. And pretty. I think your dark circles are hot.” 

You huff out a laugh and ignore the flutter in your chest at ‘baby’. 

Jack looks down at you with a gaze that he can’t pinpoint. You’re just very, very endearing to him. He needs to show you all kinds of fun so you laugh like that again. 

“You smell nice.” You say and hesitate before loosening yourself against him more. He hums at the increased contact and at your compliment, smiling against your hair. 

“Thank you.” 

To say you had the absolute time of your life at the aquarium was an understatement. Jack got to see a side of you that loved fun, that was carefree, and didn’t have that goddamn crease in your eyebrows. You were the one pulling him around, telling him you wanted to be a marine biologist as a kid and that you recognize most of the species. Jack made sure to snap a few pictures of you when you weren’t looking, the lightning shaped twinkle in your eyes a memory he wanted to keep forever. 

Later that day, Jack drove you back to your apartment, mentally noting that you were about a fifteen minute drive from his place. 

“Nala?” You coo out softly as you push open the door and drag Jack inside, not giving him the chance to protest. Jack looks around at your apartment. It’s small and messy, but organized in some places. He jumps and lets out a brief scream when a fucking tiger is bounding towards you at full speed and knocking you over with a hug. You laugh as your beloved Nala starts licking up your face and you both roll on the floor. 

Jack’s breathing calms a little as he remembers who owns the tiger. 

“I’ll put her away for now.” You say, reading Jack’s skepticism. He sighed in relief. 

“Oh good. Because as much as you reassured me and as man as I am, she’s still a tiger.” You giggle at his words and guide Nala towards her room. 

The sound makes Jack smile stupidly. His heart stutters and he wants to put your little laugh on replay. He can’t believe that a girl who stated random medical facts at any time, who lost sleep because ‘she just forgot that it’s important’, who barely remembered him from a while ago even though he remembered everything, who waves at planes as they fly overhead, who didn’t know shit about the sport he played, had him wrapped tightly around her finger. 

He takes a moment to observe your apartment. The stacks of medical related books that he doesn’t want to and never will understand, the old record player sitting in the corner of the kitchen, a huge jar of nutella on the coffee table, a questionable fluffy purple blanket on your sofa. Just little things that made you all the more real to him. 

And he still wants to know more. He wants to know your sleep schedule so he knows that you’re getting enough sleep and when to text or call, he wants to know what you dream of, he wants to know your passions besides studying, he wants to know what made you become so numb and detached, how you still managed to have a twinkle in your eye when you experienced emotion. 

But, as he leans to the counter for support at his racing mind and as you enter the room, still clad in your godforsaken low cut top and curve-hugging shorts, he most of all wants to know what you are like, what your lips would feel like molded against his, how you’d moan or whimper at his touch. He’s still leaning against the counter as he recalls when you unabashedly pushed your tits together just hours ago. 

“You alright?” You ask, but you yourself seemed to have distressed eyebrow lines. 

“Uh? Oh yeah. I was just.” He gestures around your apartment. “Observing.” 

You nod, still lost in thought. 

“Are you okay?” He asks, not liking the stress in your body language. 

“Yeah. It’s just, I have two projects due next week and I’ve been studying for something else so I completely forgot about them.” You frown, feeling tears pool in your eyes. You can’t cry in front of Jack. If everything else didn’t make him abandon you, then this would. 

“Woah. Hey, hey.” Jack is by your side immediately. He feels guilty for thinking of you sinfully while you were in distress but he really couldn’t help it. You blink back the tears and shrug it off. 

“It gets kind of a lot sometimes, y’know?” Jack follows you to the couch and sits next to you, immediately taking your hands in his and pulling your legs onto his lap. You gave up on keeping your cool when he does that and give him a bewildered expression. Being taken care of is so strange. 

“And? Go on, baby.” He smiles softly and encouragingly, dropping one of your hands to hold your chin for a moment before grabbing your hand again. 

You blink. 

“Well, It’s probably not as much as I’m stressing it out to be. I’m about to abuse substances.” 

“Now don’t do that. There’s lots of ways to destress yourself.” Jack’s hand wanders again, resting on your bare knee. His movements are soft and gentle, but they still cause a foreign spark through your body. You dryly cough before registering his words and looking at Jack’s hand that had inched higher by the slightest. 

“Is this flirting?” Rushed out of your mouth and Jack chuckles, a normal sound but an octave lower. 

“Sure is, baby. You’re learning fast.” He’s staring your eyes down, and all of a sudden he’s consuming your senses again. His cologne is still there, his insane blues are glued to yours, his deep breathing is signifying his increasing heart rate. His hand inches higher as he moves closer. 

“Why don’t I just,” shrug, “eat you out? ‘S a better high than drugs-” His phone buzzes in his pocket. 

Jack huffs and pulls away, leaving your insides churning at the his lingering touch and words??? The implication alone, the images conjuring in your head were nothing short of filthy. 

He scowls as he takes the call, muttering something about how it’s his agent and he’ll get in trouble if he doesn’t answer. His responses are curt and his expression neutral, but his hand is gripping your thigh with intensity. As he hangs up the call and tosses his phone aside, his hand is almost at your inner thigh and he maneuvers himself to be directly on his knees on the floor in front of you. 

The sudden movement and his face looking up at yours between your slightly parted legs has your pussy throbbing. It’s been weeks since you were.. in this particular position with someone and god did it feel nice that it was the finest man in world to unpause your sex life. 

He leans up to be face level with you. “Do you trust me, baby?” You never noticed how sultry his natural voice was. 

His eyes search yours for any kind of discomfort as his hand reaches forward to cup your cheek. You nod in conformation as he moves closer. 

Your breath hitches as he presses his lips to your cheek, dangerously close to your mouth. It confuses you slightly as to why he didn’t just kiss you but both of his hands on your waistband distracts you. 

“Can I take these off?” He questions and you nod once again, not trusting your voice. 

He’s doing everything in slow motion and you think it alludes to your sensitivity earlier, but anticipation and his hands cloud everything in your mind. 

What kind of guy just? offers to eat you out? to help you destress? 

Your shorts are discarded and the exposure doesn’t bother you. Sure your heart would be thudding either way, but Jack made you feel different. No anxiety in the sense that he would judge you or harm you or hurt your feelings.

“Hm, these are cute.” Jack’s thumb fingers over the lining of your underwear. 

You feel yourself flush. 

“Thanks.” Is your quiet response. 

“Relax, baby. This is for you to unwind, not to get nervous. Focus on how you’re feeling,”   Jack instructs as his finger ghosted over your clothed cunt. Your teeth nibble on your bottom lip as you push your hips closer to his hand. 

He smirks at your eagerness and gives in, entirely pushing his thumb against your clit through your panties. 

His thumb moves slowly but firmly back and forth as he gauges your reaction. Finding the right spots where your stomach clenches or your eyebrows knit together. 

“More.” You muster as you open your eyes to look down at Jack who was already moving to take your damp panties off. Once again, slowly. He groans as he sees you glistening for him and starts kissing up your thigh. 

“You have a pretty face.” 

Jack grins up at your compliment while peppering feather light kisses on your inner thighs. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

The anticipation pools in your lower stomach as Jack breaks eye contact with you to admire your delicacy in front of him. He uses the same thumb to rub through your folds and reach higher to circle your clit. The stimulation has you moaning softly and the sound has Jack’s cock twitching in his shorts. 

“I- hurry.” You huff in slight annoyance, wanting more besides the slow circles. Jack smirks against your thigh and removes his thumb so he could move forward lick a stripe through your folds. 

Your knuckles get white gripping the pillow,  itching to hold his hair instead as his eyes flicker between yours and your pussy. Jack notices your hand on the pillow and guide it to his hair while sucking and licking your cunt. He parts away for a second to catch his breath before making slow and languid motions with his tongue on your clit. 

You grip his hair, hard. Jack grunts against you and loses a shred of control as he pulls your legs apart further to dive further in. You let out a startled breath at the sudden movement and pull on his hair more as he shakes his head deeper while still staring up at you. 

“Jack..” you breathe out, but it comes out as more of a whimper that makes him hum against you and a spark run through his body. He pulls away and inserts his middle and ring finger through your slick and pumps shortly before curling his fingers. You heave a breath and moan at the feeling while Jack stares up at you in awe. 

“You’re everything.” He says more to himself than you, as he watches you writhe and whimper at his fingers while holding the eye contact. He connects his lips with your clit again and suctions in a way that has your back arching and your moans getting louder and more high pitched with each type of attention Jack gives to your pussy. 

He switched his fingers and mouth and rubs your clit as he laps up your arousal as he feels you getting close. He takes that moment to switch back and locks eyes with you as his dark pink, wet lips attach to your clit again, softly sucking you closer to your tipping point.

“Oh, f-fuck I’m-“  

Your eyebrows knit and your eyes roll back at the sensations of his mouth and tongue and fingers and gaze. 

You spasm around his fingers and moan louder while Jack’s fingers guide you through your release. He licks up whatever he can before sitting and wiping his face with the back of his hand as you stare at him with hooded and tired eyes. 

“Feel better?” He has the nerve to ask as he runs a wet wipe up and between your legs. 

When did he even get that?

Your leg twitches in sensitivity after he’s finished. 

“Mm better.” Was all you could muster. All you wanted was to sleep and dream for days. 

Jack laughs softly at your state and checks the time. 

“I’ll need to head out soon. Team dinner.” He says as he fits another pair of underwear on you. You feel a pang in your chest and anxiety creeps up your spine, but Jack immediately shuts your thoughts down. 

“Hey, this doesn’t mean I’ll abandon you or anything. I’m goin’ cause I have to and I would take you but you look like you could use a nap. We can hang tomorrow?” He’s so soft and caring with you, cupping your cheek and smoothing his thumb over it. 

“Yeah okay.” You say and watch as he gets up, not before pressing a kiss to your forehead. 

“I won’t go anywhere, baby.” 

After the team dinner, when Jack got home and shut the door to his apartment, the first thing he did was call his older brother. Quinn was just the slightest, itty-bittiest bit more fortunate with girls, so Jack naturally went to him for tips here and there. 

A few minutes into the call, they exchanged formalities and talked about each others’ seasons before Quinn cut to the chase. 

“So? Is it a girl?”

Jack blanched. 

“I- well yes, but it’s different this time. Swear.”

“You say that every-time. But it does sound like it might be different.”

“Do you remember Dee from high school?”

“I don’t remember anything from high school.” Is it really that common to forget four years of your life?

“Yeah well. I met her again a few weeks ago. She was the one who used to take all the APs and she graduated early? She was like always tired and kinda funny. And she’s pretty. Like the natural kind of pretty. You’d look at her and want to give up the world for her kind of pretty. I don’t know.” Quinn listened quietly, detecting the hint of fear in Jack’s voice. 

“I might be, like obsessed with her. I think she knows.”

“Wait, wait, wait. She knows? That you like her? And you’re not together yet?” Jack didn’t deny it when he said that he liked her. 

“I-yes? I think so. She might be into me too and we did a thing earlier today and she flirts with me without even thinking about it? That’s gotta mean something right?”

“You did things with her?!She flirts with you?! Do something. But take it slow. She probably still wonders why you even give her the time of day. She likes you but she doesn’t know it yet.” Hearing his older brother say it untightened his chest. 

“I was going to kiss her but I really wanted to things slow with her. She’s been through a bit and, I don’t know, I want to treat her special.” He’s glad that he has a person he can say the cringiest shit to. If it was anyone else on the other line, he would get toasted for the rest of his life. Jack wore his heart on his sleeve and was smart at reading people and their emotions. But sometimes he was just clueless on what to do with that knowledge. 

We can hang tomorrow. 

Who the fuck says that after going down on someone. 

Jack didn’t text you that night.

Or the next morning. 

You started panicking slightly when you come home from classes. 

That had to have been the last straw for him. 

He’s a fucking superstar, he lives in the New York City area, where all the pretty models and blue eyed blondes live. Why the hell would he go for a tired med student from his home state who didn’t care about herself enough to care for him?

Your mind runs a marathon as the elevator doors open to your floor. But when you approach your apartment, Jack is sitting on the floor next to door, scrolling on his phone. 

You freeze and stare blankly as he realizes that you’re here.

He perks up and walks over to you pulling you into a light hug. 

“Hey, Dee. How were classes?”

“Good. Thanks for asking.” You reply, hesitantly wrapping your arms back around him. You weren’t hugged a lot as a kid or growing up. You’ve hugged more in the last two weeks than you have in your entire life. 

“I have a game later today. Wanna come? The other team…isn’t that good. We might win. Unless you have work to do. Or if you just don’t want to go that’s okay too. Or-“ he cuts off when you press a finger against his lips. 

“I’d love to go. I finished a lot of my work during classes.” You smile removing your fingers, relaxing in his arms. “When is it?” 

“At 7. I’ll pick you up, yeah?” 

“Yeah.” 

You both just stand there for a minute before you remember social cues. 

“So, come in? I’m hungry as fuck. We should eat.” You say pushing the door open, petting Nala as you walk in and Jack followed. He smiles at your awkwardness and accepts. 

Your look is acceptable. Hair clutched back, light makeup, hoodie and sweats is your go-to anyway. Plus, you’re always cold. 

You arrive at around quarter to seven and with the help of signs make your way to the lounge that Jack gave you a pass to. 

There’s a guard at the door that held his hand out for the pass and when you gave it to him he eyed you wearily. 

“You’re Hughes’ girl? Where did you get this?”

“Jack gave it to me.” 

“Uh huh.”

You furrow your eyebrows. “So can I go in?” 

“Sweetheart, Jack has only ever invited two other girls here and I can tell you right now, you’re not the third. Who gave you this pass?” 

The mention of Jack bringing other girls here makes you absolutely sick to your stomach. 

You might vomit. 

But anger bubbles up your throat and you’re about to press your finger into the guards chest and give him a piece of your mind, when there’s a patter of feet and an excited “Dee!” coming from your left. 

Jack has you in his arms already before you could register it. He tucks you into his shoulder, presses his lips against your temple, lingering, and faces the guard. 

“Was there a problem?” The guards mouth hangs open and flickers between the two of you. 

“None at all.” He opens the door and lets the two of you in. After he shuts the door and turns face you, you take a second to admire him. 

He’s dressed in his game jersey, shoulder pads and everything; except for his skates. 

He looks really good. 

“You look really good.” 

Silence. 

“Are you blushing?” 

Jack pulls you into his chest so you don’t see more of the pink adorning his cheeks. 

“Am not,” he mutters above your head and you giggle as you try to untangle from his grasp. 

You pull back and notice that he still has a tint on his cheeks. He holds your face for a moment, admiring every feature. Going from eye to eye, the slope of your nose, the dimple digging into your left cheek, a beauty mark on your chin, your lips. 

You feel your breath quickening when his thumb grazes your cheek and his eyes linger on your lips a little longer. 

A sharp knock on the door interrupted the two of you. 

“Warm ups in two!”

Jack sighed and looked back at you. 

“I need to go. You can watch from here.” He led you further into the room and you could hear the crowd getting louder as you got closer. He led you to a balcony where there were a few other people, and pecked your cheek before going back. 

The game starts and you’re more clueless that you thought you’d be. The puck was way too small and you didn’t bring your glasses, but you remember Jack telling you that he was ‘86’, so you tried to follow wherever he was. 

The girl next to you strikes up a conversation which you cautiously tread with, but you warm up soon. She tells you that she’s dating someone on the team. 

“Woah. That must be cool.” She looks confused. 

“Aren’t you Jack’s girl?”

“No? We’re friends. I think. He’s really nice to me.” Your new friend blinks before talking again. 

“He really likes you though, and you look like you really like him.” 

“Well of course I do. He treats me really well.” 

“Oh, babe. No. He like likes you. My boyfriend told me he talks about you all the time.” She holds your hand. You look down at it and back at her. You’re quiet for a moment. You’re not sure how to process that. 

“I’m not sure how to process that.”

“Well, do you like him? Love him even?” 

“I-“

You’re cut off by that awfully loud goal horn, and glance at the screen to see that Jack has scored. You felt a surge of pride in your chest and feel yourself smiling wide as Jack’s tiny figure skated around and fist bumped the players on the bench. He turns to your section for a moment, lingering for a sliver of a second and your heart stops. The game called for the face-off just a second later so he had to look away. 

You look over to the girl on your right and she’s already looking at you with a half smirk. 

Jack politely declined on drinks later in the locker room after the devils won. 

He leans against his car and thinks about you. He really wanted to see you, needed your affirmation. 

It’s all he seems to do now. Jack just wants reassurance and peace in knowing that you were there. He spent every waking moment thinking about you and how he got you to show sides of yourself that you don’t show to people. He tried to keep his personal life away from hockey but the way his instincts told him to look in your general direction after he scored made him sick to his stomach. 

He might actually be stupid obsessed with you. 

Trusting his gut on your body language and making a bold move the previous night may have been the best thing he’s ever done.

That means that he doesn’t need to be cautious with his flirting anymore. He knows exactly what he feels but he wants to wait til you come to that conclusion on your own. 

He didn’t notice your quiet footsteps in his direction and was mildly startled when you were standing in front of him. Almost at once, he felt a smile adorn his face. 

“That was so cool, I didn’t understand anything but I know you scored.” Your wide, twinkling eyes stared back up at him. “I’m proud of you.”

And that’s all it took for him to usher you into the back seat, strip off your sweatpants, and throw your legs over his shoulders. 

Not even ten minutes later, your lungs are dying for air and your body is covered in a thin sheet of sweat. He was rougher this time, sucking a hickey on your neck before, getting the entire bottom half of his face messy, his own hooded eyes losing focus as he pleasured you.  

“You back to me yet, baby?”

“Hm?” 

You open your eyes and you’re in the front seat, cleaned up, pants back on, and Jack is fastening your seatbelt for you. 

“I lost you for like, three minutes there. You okay?”

His voice is gentle and quiet, his index and thumb holding your chin softly as his azure eyes bore into yours. 

“Chipotle?”

He laughs, pulling back and shifting the gear into drive, his hair falling slightly in his face and he pushes it back. 

“All the chipotle in the world for my Dee.”

Your mind briefly flashed to how he kissed the tip of your nose before he went down on you, and not your lips.

You’re in Jack’s apartment now (your heart dropping when you thought of Nala, but then you remembered that you fed her quite well and she had to be passed out by now. Jack handed you a Hershey’s kiss to calm you down), and it’s big. 

Like, huge. 

Massive for someone who lives alone.

His TV was playing ‘How to lose a guy in 10 days’ and you were watching like a hawk. 

“I’ve never seen this one before.”

“Really? You don’t watch romcoms?” Jack looks at you surprised, sitting next to you with both of your chipotle orders and throwing a blanket over the two of you. 

“No. I don’t really get the time.” You furrow your brows and turn to him with a blank expression. “You’ve showed me so much fun in the last few weeks. Thank you.”

Jack could happily die in that moment. He flashes back to yesterday again, your childlike wonder, the new things he learnt about you. 

“‘S nothing yet. There’s so much more you deserve to feel happy about.” He kisses your temple before getting closer to you. 

You both watch in silence for a while, occasionally laughing and aw-ing, until you can’t hold it back anymore. 

“Do you think kissing is unhygienic?”

You look up to him, his unbuttoned shirt, messy hair and lingering smile making your heart skip a beat. 

Oh no. 

You have such a horrible, fat crush on him.

“Hm?”

“I-nothing.”

“M’kay.”

Sweet boy is not a multitasker and the movie was at a really good part, so he didn’t really get distracted and soon you were engrossed too. 

You were still in a cloud of feelings and it was getting a bit much for you. Your head was usually void of emotion, so the change was welcome. And you had Jack to thank for that. He’s done so much for you, taken care of you in ways that no one has and no one ever will. 

You realize that he could be your worst heartbreak or someone that’s going to be in your life forever. 

You feel slightly sick thinking about it and you need to get it out of your system. 

“Can I suck you off?” Your lips lightly brush his ear. 

Now that. 

That gets Jack’s attention. 

He nearly snaps his neck to turn to face you and your noses touch. 

“You- I- what?”

Your fingertips are feathery as you brush the hair out of his face. 

“I want to suck your dick.”

“You don’t- if this is to- to reciprocate or something-“

“I promise it’s not. I really just want to.”

Jack is already semi-hard and he can feel his dress pants tighten. His eyes briefly widen and he borderline gulps before he watches your hand run down his chest and toy with his belt buckle. As soon as he gives you the green light and pauses ‘How to lose a guy in 10 days’, you’re on your knees in front of him, just like how he was with you the previous night. 

Jack’s sanity is once again lost as he watches you on your knees for him. You make a quick work of his belt buckle and pull down his dress pants just enough. 

You can already see how loaded he is through his boxers and look back up at him with the same wide eyes that he goes crazy over. 

“Cool.” 

Jack barely has time to react over your concise approval of his length before you’re mouthing over his boxers, sucking softly, leaving Jack gasping for a breath. 

You pull down his boxers and start working immediately, pumping him and wetting your hands slightly so you have more friction. 

“Y’know, it’s crazy—I know what all of these veins are called.” You say, more to yourself but Jack’s half smile drops when you lay your tongue flat against his shaft and suck on his tip. He lets out an embarrassing sound between a staggered breath and a whimper as you make your way down. Your cheeks hollow out as you make eye contact with him, making sure you’re getting it right. You come off and continue with your hands and look up at him. 

“Good?”

“F- Christ- fuck, so good, baby. So good.” 

Happy with yourself, you continue to suck him clean while he chokes out moans and his stomach clenches. You can feel him getting heavier in your mouth and you start speeding up, using both of your hands. 

There’s a moment when he reaches forward to push your hair out of your face, so that you don’t get bothered and so that he sees you properly, which warms your heart. 

He taps one of yours hands that’s on him to indicate that he’s close and you pull back with a kitten lick to his tip before sticking your tongue out.

You have Jack seeing stars when his load pumps into your mouth, and your eyes dart over his shirt clinging to his chest, his hair falling into his screwed shut eyes, his lips parted and his hand gripping the sofa with such intensity that his veins pop out. 

You tuck him back into his clothing after cleaning him up, and he looks at you with tired eyes while making grabby hands. 

You chuckle, climbing into his arms and he slumps his body against you, both of you now lying down on the couch as he unpauses the movie. 

His head rests comfortably against your chest, one of your hands running through his hair, and the other intertwined with his. 

It’s sweet. 

Jack wakes up alone and panics at once. It’s embarrassing, really; like finding out your stuffed animal fell to the floor during your sleep as a toddler. But when he checks his messages, he finds a text from you. 

Hey, I had to leave. I have a project due tomorrow and also Nala :( We can meet up later. I had fun yesterday. Thank you :))

It’s hits Jack how gone he is when he finds himself clutching his phone to his heart. 

It takes a while. 

He comes home fresh from morning practice took a nice long nap to clear his head before waking up properly to see that it was raining outside. 

He was enjoying (not) the protein shake that he was required to drink and mindlessly scoring through plays from an old game, when it hits him like a sack of bricks. 

Do you think kissing is unhygienic? 

You think he doesn’t want to kiss you. 

You think he’s toying with your heart by showing you all kinds of affection besides the one thing that both of you wanted so fucking bad. 

You think he doesn’t like you enough to do that yet. 

The drive to yours was smooth despite the rain pouring down from every direction, and because you always reminded him of road safety. 

You were standing outside of the apartment building, looking like you were having an argument with.. your tiger. 

Your hands were on your hips, body soaked and hair wet as you tried to coax Nala into shelter. 

Jack laughed at both of your antics which got your attention. Your mind flashes back to the day that you met him, the pouring rain, and how awkward it was to meet someone you knew from a while back. You wave at him happily as he approached, but noticed a hint of  anxiety and embarrassment. 

“What’s wro-?“

“Are you into poetry?”

“Uh, sometimes? Why?”

“This- well, I can’t read it. Here.” 

He hands over his phone, stuffs his hands in his pockets and looks at anything but you. Puzzled, you cover his phone from the pelting droplets so you could read. 

‘The first time you caught my eye

it was not love at first sight. 

Instead a quiet curiosity was

planted in my chest and I knew

it was only a matter of time before 

you sunk beneath my bones and

nurtured this deep seated familiarity

into a love so fierce that I would question

if I had ever been in love before.’

Lyra Wren. 

You read it again. 

There’s no way he actually searched for a poem to depict how he felt. 

“Look, I didn’t understand half of it hit you get the-“

Jack was cut off by our lips against his. 

It was short, maybe a second long, closed mouth, but you pulled away breathless and were close enough to feel his heart racing underneath his clothes. 

How desperately he wanted your cold, soft lips against his again. 

“So, you like me? For who I am?”

He nods. 

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I-“ 

You were interrupted by Nala’s whine (to say: I change my mind, I want to go inside), and you give Jack his phone, grab his hand and pull him inside. 

“C’mon, we’ll get pneumonia.”

Your hands were still in each others, his engulfing yours, when you shut the door to your apartment, locked it, watched Nala bound to her room, and turned to face him again properly. 

He was so, so close. Your lips were parted, just inches apart, your foreheads touching. 

He closed the gap this time, almost groaning in relief when he felt your mouth properly against his, something you both yearned for without realizing. His lips move against yours gently, savoring as much of you as he can. He nips your bottom lip and it has you and Jack smiling into the kiss. And then it’s a mess, teeth clashing, giggling, tongues lolling over another, one of his hands cupping your face and the other wrapped around your waist, but it feels like everything you’ve ever wanted. 

You pull back. 

“I love you more.”

[thatfandomslut]

Get Her Back!

Regina George x Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Trigger Warnings: messy breakups, toxic relationship talks, jealousy, language,

Request:

Hi can you write a fic about fem!reader being Regina's ex? Like they met and started dating during summer. Reader is from another town/state and Regina spent the summer there over some relatives house and they had a nasty break up but then a few months later reader's family moved to her town and she started at Northshore 😂 she sees Regina acting like a queen b before Regina saw her and she befriends Janis and Ian <3 anyways don't spare us all the drama hehe

Mean Girls requests are open.

(Y/n) sat beside Janis as the crowd parted and four girls made their way through the halls. With raised brows, she looked their way, despite Damian's pleas not to. There was Cady, the girl she had met alongside Janis and Damian in French class, a girl with wavy black hair without a thought behind her eyes, a honey-blonde haired girl who looked around at everyone, and Regina George, her summer fling from Newport, Rhode Island. (Y/n) was surprised to see Regina, and she wasn't expecting her to be so popular. Her icy glare surveyed the room as they landed on (Y/n)'s, widening when they made eye contact. Fortunately, (Y/n) had the sense to sever the contact and sit down.

"What was that?" Damian questioned, looking between her and Regina, who let her eyes latch onto (Y/n) for a few moments longer before she made her way to their usual table. Janis was looking just as expectant at (Y/n), but the girl shrugged innocently. She was new to school, she didn't want to be involved in all of the drama high school had to offer within her first week. "Girl, you better answer. I've never seen the Queen Bee break her icy stare for just anyone."

With a sigh, (Y/n) glanced up at him, then looked to Janis for help. But she was curious to understand their connection, too. "Let's just say that Regina and I met when I was staying at my grandparents and she was staying with her grandparents in Newport, Rhode Island over the summer. She left me at a party I didn't want to attend because a guy flirted with me, then ignored me when I apologized. Even though I was apologizing for something I didn't do. The official breakup was through a text." (Y/n) explained casually as she ate some of her pizza. She ignored the wide stares from Damian and Janis, knowing they had a million questions.

Leaning back, Janis tapped her knuckles dramatically on the table. "Okay, okay, so how did you end up in the same school as her?" She looked like she was going to burst if (Y/n) didn't answer her questions. She was getting so red in the face, that Damian had to remind her to breathe, but his actions were not effective. Janis was just too curious about how their relationship went down.

(Y/n) glanced at her nails before looking over to Janis with risen brows. "Unfortunate circumstances. Our fathers are doing business together." She stated simply. A sigh escaped her lips as she looked at her pizza, losing her appetite. "Regina wasn't all bad. She was just jealous. Like, when I think about her, I'm in between keying her car and making her lunch. Sometimes, I think about her, and I'm still enamored by her, but then I'm like 'No fuck her, she left me at a party for a guy flirting with me.'" (Y/n) hummed as she pushed her tray away slightly.

Now, Janis was going to explode. She already was ruining Regina's life with Cady, but what if she also messed around with her love life a bit, too? After all, that is exactly what Regina did when she had a crush on her in middle school. "It's kind of like… You want to make her feel jealous and sad over her loss." She associated as Damian eyed her. He always seemed to know when she was plotting. She made this face where her smile looked a little more sly than usual and her eyes narrowed.

(Y/n) blinked at Janis's statement as she nodded in understanding. A small, bitter laugh escaped her lips. "Yeah, 'cause I miss the way she kissed me and the way she used to make me laugh even though she didn't deserve me." She agreed before standing up to discard her food and trash. She didn't mean to be wasteful. but she wasn't feeling her meal anymore. She was too busy thinking about her ex who gave her a whirlwind of a summer and then provided a whiplash type of breakup. Thinking about Regina brought back the whirlwind feeling and the whiplash after-effect every time. It made her bitter. Janis could relate to that bitter feeling. She never got over what Regina did to her. From the kiss to 'Sissy Liz,' Regina's actions were inexcusable. "All in all… I want sweet revenge but I want her again, too." (Y/n) admitted shamelessly.

Janis smirked, leaning forward, and taking (Y/n)'s hands. She knew that Regina tensed at this because she saw it from her periphery. "We can make that happen for you. Do you see those girls beside Regina? The girl with big amber eyes is Gretchen, and the girl with wavy black hair is Karen… There's a party next week on Halloween… If you flirt with them, that will set Regina off." Janis stated, biting her lip excitedly. "Hopefully, this will set Regina George straight for you," Janis confirmed, winking at (Y/n). (Y/n) considered this for a moment. Finally nodding, Janis almost squealed before the three got up and headed to their next class.

On the night of Halloween, Janis and Damian helped (Y/n) get ready. And Janis had to try not to stare at herself. She understood why Regina was so into (Y/n). She kind of was, too. (Y/n) turned around in her very revealing devil costume, smiling over at Damian and Janis. "So, what do you think?" She questioned, wiggling her eyebrows over at them to get their opinions. Damian smirked over at her as he nodded in approval, but Janis was too stunned to speak. "I'll take your faces as a sign of approval." She said happily as she kissed the little cape over her shoulders. "I'll come right over once the party is over." (Y/n) promised, heading out the door, but not before blowing them kisses.

Regina was blown away when (Y/n) walked into the party, and she was taken aback when she saw Cady's outfit. Everyone screamed when Cady popped out behind the girl in red, but she couldn't say she was phased. She was used to Cady doing things that were out there. Still, she didn't stop herself from texting Gretchen and asking who invited Cady. Regina rolled her eyes when she saw that Gretchen pointed out Cady's crush on Aaron. This was obvious to her, but still, maybe she could kill two birds with one stone. She could make (Y/n) jealous and Cady miserable. Even though a bigger part of her wondered if making (Y/n) jealous was worth it. Until she turned to see a flustered Gretchen and a confident (Y/n).

Regina realized that (Y/n) was flirting with Gretchen. Her plans on getting Aaron back and making Cady miserable were put on hold, her eye twitching as (Y/N) soon moved over to flirt with Karen, too. Was this a game to her? Before she could react, she bumped into Aaron, who almost spilled his drink all over her. That was when she realized that making (Y/n) jealous was more important than making Cady jealous. "I was just looking for you," Regina smirked as she took Aaron to the side, acutely aware of (Y/n) and Cady staring with wide eyes.

(Y/n) felt annoyed as she watched Regina and Aaron flirt, but her heart sank when Regina kissed him. Her eyes landed on Cady, who looked heartbroken in the distance. Making her way over, she led Cady out of the house and towards Janis's. "Okay, that's it." (Y/n) spoke as she barged in. "We need to go farther. She has now officially gone after Cady, too." (Y/n) said, gesturing to the mess that was Cady right beside her, her thick make-up running down her cheeks as tears helped create pathways for them.

Janis cursed as she pulled Cady into her arms. "I completely agree. Let's run this bitch into the ground. She's always been like this. She takes everything too far." Janis gritted her teeth in frustration. She looked very angry, but (Y/n) was beginning to wonder if it was for Cady or because Regina had wronged her, too.

"So, then what did Regina do to you?" Janis looked up, horrified by the question. Damian's neck also snapped up, but his eyes were trained on Janis. Janis tried to get the attention off of her, but (Y/n) raised her brows. "Janis, this is important information. Cady and I have a reason, but what is for you? Why do you care what happens to Regina George?"

Janis flushed a bright red, realizing she wasn't going to drop it. "I guess I don't want to discuss it." She crossed her arms, falling back onto the couch behind her. Not wanting to make eye contact with anyone she slipped her mask over her face. This caused everyone to glance at each other and Damian shook his head at her. Janis knew that she was acting childish, but she didn't want to tell her new friends what Regina did to her. She was embarrassed about it, and she didn't want to lose her illusion as a confident lesbian.

"Janis, it's time," Damian ignored her protesting as he slammed a box down, grabbing a Bratz doll and a Dora doll. He then went on to explain that, once upon a time, Janis and Regina were best friends. He then went on to explain why they had stopped being friends. He explained how Regina had kissed her at a party, even though she knew how Janis felt, and then he explained how Regina outed her to the party-goers and then her class using a TY baby she named 'Sissy-Liz.' (Y/n) looked at the ground with her brows furrowed. "Now you know, Cady and (Y/n), you can never trust Regina George." And thus the revenge party began.

During lunch on Monday morning, (Y/n) ignored the looks that Regina gave her. She was mad at Regina for hurting Cady in an attempt to make her jealous. She was mad it worked, and she was even more upset that she used Gretchen and Karen to try to make Regina jealous. As Janis sat next to her, (Y/n) smiled at the girl before leaning over to wipe off the paint that smeared over Janis's cheek. At the action, she saw Regina storm out. So, in an attempt to finally talk to Regina, she excused herself and followed the blonde out of the cafeteria. "What's your problem, Regina? What the fuck is up with the Sissy-Liz and why did you kiss Aaron?" (Y/n) questioned loudly, stopping the girl down the hall.

Regina looked around at everyone with a glare, pulling (Y/n) into the classroom beside her, thankful it was empty. (Y/n) stared at her for a long moment as Regina glanced her up and down with a glare. In a weak moment, (Y/n) thought about pushing her against the door she just closed and kiss her. "What's my problem? You're the one flirting with everyone at this damn school. And why do you care who I kiss? You're the one who is all over Janis Imi'ike." Regina said Janis's name in disgust as she narrowed her eyes. Then it clicked in (Y/n) that Regina was, in fact, jealous. "Besides, I only kissed Aaron. It's not like we got back together. We talked that night and he likes Cady, for whatever reason." Regina looked away, pretending not to know why Aaron liked Cady. Everyone knew Cady was incredibly sweet and pretty.

Blinking, (Y/n) shook her head in slight frustration. "Wait, you and Aaron only kissed? Also, when are you going to realize that I only like you? I'm pissed that I still love you. You left me at a fucking party, Regina, but I'm still into you. And no matter how much you hurt me, I still want you. Do you know how fucked up that is for me?" (Y/n) sniffed as she tried to hold back her tears. She was not going to cry over this. Again. She refused to.

Regina's mouth was agape as she forced herself to look away from (Y/n). Her jaw clenched, and she felt her own tears welling in her eyes. Only these were real tears, not the fake tears she usually used on people. "I feel bad about leaving you at that party. I should have never done that. Last night, I had a reflection on the treadmill and I realized… I've hurt a lot of people. Most of all, I hurt you at that party because I was scared you would leave me for that college guy. I want to make it up to them, starting with you. I want a second chance." Regina confessed, not knowing how (Y/n) was going to react. "I want to apologize, first. So, I'm sorry." Regina swallowed thickly.

(Y/n) stood there in silence for a moment, thinking about how Regina had left her, drunk at the party with no one she knew. It had stung, but here Regina was, pulling out the stinger. Nodding slowly, she took Regina's hand, intertwining their fingers. Neither of them looked at each other, the silence becoming louder than either anticipated. "I forgive you, and I'll give you a second chance. But I can't just bounce back to being your girlfriend. You can, however; ask me on a date… I will only accept if you promise to apologize to Cady and Janis though. You don't have to do it this second or even today, but you still need to say sorry." (Y/n) said, her thumb running over Regina's knuckles.

Regina felt a bit odd, feeling soft like this. She knew it was the right thing to do though. She really cared about (Y/n) and hated seeing her and Cady rush to escape the Halloween party because of her actions. So, the expectation of apologizing to the girls was only fair. "Okay, I will. I promise. And thank you." Regina whispered. The two stayed there for long moments before they were finally forced to separate, having skipped their last two periods to stand together in silence. As they left, Regina gave (Y/n)'s hand one final squeeze, ready to try again with her. (Y/n) smiled with a nod, ready to tell Janis, Damian, and Cady all about Regina and her unexpected apology.

[ara-the-great]

One call away

Tw: slight reference to lores, slight gore (if you squint) fever and delirium, abandonment issues

(here is the request I got for Zayne and Sylus angst. I didn't know what to write so I added my own trauma. I HAVE NOT PROOF READ THIS)

You don't remember most of your childhood. Not that you cared much. The oldest thing in your memory that you could find was screams, the screams staying with your Grandma and Caleb but that too was well into your mid or late teens.

Even then you didn't have many friends, actually you had no one except Caleb. All of them either bullied you or abandoned you, they didn't care about you . You were desperate for any sort of connection as a child and as a adult.

Your dating scene was similar. Though you only had one relationship before you joined the hunters association. Even that was far from a good one. And now when you look back at it you couldn't remember much there either, you had cried so much, so damn much but still he left.

It's only after joining the association that your life started to look up. It was a new start for you. A new environment, new friends do you think they like you? and new opportunities.

You always kept your problems to yourself. You didn't want to make others worry for nothing. It's not like anyone was close enough to tell these problems anyway.

When this mysterious fever started developing you thought you could ignored it, just power though it, right? Wrong.

You could barely stand up. Slipping in and out of consciousness. Your body felt like it was being baked from the inside out. Yet it felt like your limbs were freezing off. You needed help to at least get to the hospital.

Even thinking of the hospital made you feel worse. You could practically smell the antiseptic scent of the sterile rooms. What if something is really wrong with you and you need surgery? Under the harsh flood lights and white coats and screams and they'll kill you this time. They'll hurt you. They will cut you open with a knife.

Sylus

You jolted awake shaking, you can't stop shaking. No one can save you this time. For all you know that kind-hearted boy who helped you is dead. For all you knew his body was stained as red as his eyes.

He answered "look who it is, I didn't think I'd be fortunate enough to get your call today kitten". You weren't sure when you had called Sylus but you already had. You didn't know what to say let alone why you called him. Could he even help? Suddenly you remembered the aether core. Maybe this fever was related to this. Maybe-

"kitten are you alright?" His voice sounded gruff but gave you so much comfort. But you wouldn't want to disturb him. He probably would hate you for it.

"I'm sorry i- I mistakenly called you" you managed to rasp out. Still shaking

"you don't sound well. Are you sick? Where are you?" He spoke cautiously. You weren't sure how he knew. Not sure that you cared because before you could answer a calm swept you into unconsciousness.

You woke up to someone opening your door. Shit shit shit shit shit shit . Someone was here. An intruder was here. You could barely get up and out of bed before stumbling onto the ground, your gun was nowhere to be seen. You kept trying to think where you kept it but you came up blank. You rummaged through your bedside table trying to find something to defend yourself with but your cold shaky hands weren't making it easier. The person outside had started to open your bedroom door when you found a blunt craft scissor which you held up towards whoever was inside. Your sight was blurry and your heart was beating in your ears like a war drum but you could recognize a tall figure approaching. You weren't going to let them take you back. you have to fight. You have to

"DONT COME ANY CLOSER! GET OUT IM NOT GOING BACK I WONT HESITATE TO KILL YOU DON'T YOU DARE TAKE ANOTHER STEP!" You screamed as loud as you possibly could. Tears ran down your face as you shook with what can be only described as pure terror. Scenes from the past kept flashing in your head. You could practically feel every damn cut they cut into you as a child.

You were sobbing and shaking curled up in a corner from fear and yet you kept the knife held up. It tore Sylus's heart apart to see you like this again. In the blink of an eye he was kneeling in front of you cowering form trying to reach out.

"Sweetie, Y/N please it's me. Calm down it's ok you are safe. Look at me. Shh look it's me Sylus. Its ok I won't take you anywhere, I won't hurt you." He held you in his arms even though you were wildly trying to stab him for a second. His normally smooth voice wavered and cracked.

"S-sylus? I- someone is in the house!" You deliriously mumbled from the high fever.

"kitten it was me. I came over because I was worried when you stopped talking over the phone. It seems like I was right to worry. You are burning up what happened?"

"I think I have a fever. It's ok though, I'll be ok" you said calming down. You leaned into his touch as he held you against his chest. His heartbeat was almost as rapid as yours.

"my love, I don't think you will be fine your fever feels well over 105. Why aren't you at a hospital? Why didn't you call anyone? Why didn't you call me sooner?"

"i didn't think you would come"

"all you need to do is say my name and I'll be there for you. Now come, let's get you to the clinic"

You shook your head trying to insist you were fine but the worry in his eyes only made you reconsider your choice

"Can you tell me why you don't want to go?" His eyes and his voice were lulling you to sleep again

"scared" your voice was barely a whisper. You could feel yourself slip into unconsciousness yet again.

When you came to you weren't in your house. Just before you could panic you felt sylus talk. His arms still around you like a shield from everything you were afraid of.

"it's ok you are with me. I'm here. I bought you to the N109 zone. You needed to see a doctor so I called one to my house. So no hospital, don't worry." Sylus explained without you even asking.

"thank you" you said quietly, feeling ashamed of the scene you caused earlier.

"For?" He asked with a brow quirked up.

"For not asking what all that was, and for bringing me here and also for taking care of me."

He laughed softly "You don't need to thank me for taking care of you. I always take care of what's mine." His eyes were ever so soft as he brushed away your hair from your face. "Now sleep. You are still sick"

"but I feel a bit bet-"

"Sleep kitten. I'll take care of everything else" he said softly kissing your forehead.

Zayne

You stared at your phone contemplating whether or not you should call Zayne. Though you were in a relationship you couldn't just disturb him. He was a busy guy. He had surgeries and more serious patients to take care of.

Your phone began ringing. Speak of the devil.

"Y/N? This is zayne. Are you alright? This is the second time you missed your appointment this week." His cool voice sounded across the phone.

"zayne, ah I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I just have a bit of a fever."

" A fever? That gives you more reasons to come over to the clinic does it not? Do not worry about the appointments. I'm coming to pick you up. Are you at your apartment?"

"Zayne its truly not necessary I don't want to burden yo-"

"Rubbish, I was already headed out. So do not worry about burdening me. Worry about taking care of yourself" he cut the call before you could try to persuade him that you were fine. You were just grateful that someone was there. Even though zayne had abandoned you before. He didn't care about you. It was his job as a doctor to care for his patients.

You didn't realise when you had slipped into the sweet embrace of unconsciousness.

But by the time you had woken up your skin felt like it was burning from the fever. This wasn't normal. Glancing over at the clock you saw it was around 1 am. Zayne wasn't here yet. Why did you expect he would be here? You knew not to trust in what people say so why was your eyes tearing up?

As your fever kept increasing it became harder and harder to move around, it was painful to even sit up. He had abandoned you again. Your ex was right. You were annoying and in the end everyone would leave you. Nobody could ever love you.

The memory of zayne flashed across your mind. He had promised to always look after you. To be there for you.

You gritted your teeth kept mumbling "it's ok. I'll be ok" to yourself like a mantra as you somehow got a coat on your back to head to the hospital. You weren't sure how you'd reach there but the first step was to get out. Every promise that has been made to me has been a lie why would this one not be?

Just as you were about to get out of your room, your door softly swung open, revealing Zayne with an apron and a tray of soup in his hands. He seemed taken abac. But perhaps not as much as you.

"And where are you going? You shouldn't be up with such a high fever." He said as he kept the soup on the table. His cold eyes were filled with worry. Even seeing him had you breaking down into tears.

He scrambled to hold you as you collapsed on the floor crying. "What happened, where does it hurt?" He hurriedly measured your pulse and fever trying to find any sort of answer from your incoherent sobbing.

"Wh-when, when did you get here" you managed to croak out once you had calmed down a bit

"I got here long ago but since you were sleeping I didn't want to wake you. I was in the kitchen making soup for the fever, knowing you, your stomach is empty." He said as he slowly settled you into your bed.

As he turned around to bring the soup he meticulously made for you, you grabbed the back of his finely pressed shirt, "don't leave. Please don't leave, please stay. Please. I would die if you left me." you kept begged in your fever induced delirium. It broke Zaynes once frozen heart to see such fear and pain in your eyes.

He slowly leaned over to kiss you on the forehead "I won't. I'm just getting your soup. You need to eat something if you want to get better. You can't have medicine on an empty stomach"

Throughout the rest of the night Zayne diligently fed you and took care of you. And when you found it hard to sleep he would cradle you in his arms and read out his medical papers to distract you from your thoughts.

"I'm here, I'm here sweetheart, it will be ok. I'm not going to leave even if the gods demand me to" he comforted you every time you jolted awake. He would be whispering words of comfort to you till you fell asleep again and continue telling you how much he would give up for you. This treatment would go on for days, till you recovered. And even though you didn't remember how you begged him to stay, he would reassure you that he'd be there for you whenever he could.

[lostreverb]

chances

(frat!kyle spencer x fem!reader)

content: fluff, angst (if you squint?), mentioned sexual harassment (by frat members)

a/n: not proofread, short drabble inspired by this post, wrote it really fast so sorry if it's not the best (it's my first time writing for kyle too so)! also, the last line is sick I'm aware I'M SORRY RYAN MURPHY POSSESSED ME

when your boyfriend kyle told you that he was joining the fraternity kappa lambda gamma you seriously thought he was joking. kyle was caring, hard-working, kind. yeah, he liked to joke around, but he was nothing like those greek alphabet degenerates you associated frats with. you told him this earnestly. it wasn't just a passing judgment, it was a genuine concern for him. trapped in a house with all those guys? kyle could handle himself well growing up in the 9th ward, but these frat guys were different to the types of people he was used to dealing with. you didn't want to see him to get hurt, or worse... start becoming like them.

when you expressed your feelings to him, kyle (of course politely) brushed your concerns off.

"give em' a chance..." he told you, caressing your head in his lap. "they're not all as bad as ya think. and even some of em' that are a bit.. y'know.. they're good people at heart, i can tell. they just hafta be put in the right direction."

"and is that why you're gonna try and become president?"

"yep! kappa lambda gamma has the potential to be one of the best chapters tulane has ever seen. that, and it gets ya some pretty awesome connections"

he was right.. a lot of past frat members had become pretty successful and kyle could use that to his advantage.

"okay fair... just, be safe okay? stick to what you know- who you are"

"oh i f'sure will" he flashed a knowing smile, leaning in to plant a tender kiss on your lips. your hands found their way into his golden curls, drawing him closer for a deeper connection.

as if on cue, the moment kyle pulled away, his phone began to ring. he glanced at the screen, and an apologetic smile appeared on his lips as he answered the call, shifting slightly as if bracing for what was coming.

"whoa, whoa, whoa, ma, slow down. what's going on? i’m at a—" he hesitated, casting a quick glance your way, "—at a friend’s, i told ya already... yeah, i’ll be home soon... what? right now?" there was a brief pause before he sighed. "okay, ma. love you too."

as kyle lowered the phone, you let out a soft sigh, already knowing what was coming. "gotta go, huh?"

"yeah, i’m sorry, baby..." he took your hand gently, lifting it to his lips in one smooth motion, the warmth of his breath tickling your skin before his lips brushed your knuckles. his fingers slid between yours, intertwining, and then he leaned in close, pressing a lingering kiss to your temple. "i’ll see you on campus, okay?"

you nodded, trying to mask the disappointment tugging at your chest. "mhm… see you," you murmured, sitting up and watching him leave.

--

"oh my god" your jaw dropped as kyle stepped out of the bathroom. you had gone to surprise him after move-in day, wanting to see how he was adjusting to the frat life. and oh boy did he adjust. he had the blue embroidered polo with the collar obnoxiously flipped up, a white long sleeve underneath it, rolled up to the elbows, even-

"your hair!" you gasped. kyle's once luscious curls you loved to run your hands through had now become flat and side-swept. you silently cursed yourself for ever teaching him how to use a flat iron so he could help you do your hair.

"well y'know you could say hi-" he chuckled, enjoying your reaction to his new look. "like it?"

to be honest, you didn't hate it, as much as you wanted to. kyle had a way of making anything look good. it was more what it represented that made your stomach churn.

"you certainly look the part" you said, forcing a half-smile. "all you need now is a backwards cap and a blood alcohol content of .12%"

he laughed, walking over and nudging your arm. "c'mon babe. open mind, remember?"

you sighed. "right... open mind" you glanced over him again, noticing how the fabric of his clothes hugged his frame in a way that accentuated his muscles. "okay.. you do look really hot i'm just wor-"

"gonna stop ya right there." he gently placed a hand on your arm, giving you a warm smile. "thank you. i'm happy ya came."

"i'm... happy i'm here- well, with you anyway" you couldn’t help but let the corners of your mouth lift. kyle just had that effect on you.

"..seriously though," you started again, looking into his eyes with a hint of concern.

kyle’s expression softened as he wrapped an arm around your lower back. "i promise it's stoppin' here, alright? all this… it's just surface level. you still have me." he gestured vaguely to his clothes and hair. "this is still the same me."

you held his gaze, trying to believe him, though a small part of you still worried that he may fall in too deep.

"please baby, give em' a chance..."

"what kind of chance?" you looked up at him, raising an eyebrow. "because i was violated like three different ways just walking up to your room." the words came out half-joking, but there was an edge to your tone that kyle didn’t miss.

he straightened up, eyes narrowing, and his brow furrowed with a fierce protectiveness. "what happened?"

"i'm kidding... kinda. nothing crazy just a few wandering eyes" you waved it off, though the memory of being looked up and down like that made your skin crawl for a second.

"i'll talk to em' about it. if they say or do anything else, tell me. i'll cut their fuckin' balls off" his voice was serious, and though he didn't mean it literally, you knew he would go to war for the people he cared about.

"as long as i get to watch," you giggled, leaning into him a little more.

"...any chance you’ll stop using that flat iron, though?" you asked, giving his new hairstyle a gentle tease, still missing the curls that used to frame his face.

"when i'm dead." he chuckled with a cocky grin.

"we’ll see about that."

--

tags (ask to be added or removed anytime!): @fear-is-truth @juliamaximoff @jazz-berry @violetsghosts @heartz4peter

[baldursgate3tempobsessed]

Hiii!

I love your writing, especially Mirror, Mirror! Are you still taking request? I‘ve been thinking about Ascended Astarion and female Tav/Reader attending a ball for the politicians and nobles of Baldur’s Gate, getting all dressed up and socializing, dancing and Astarion flirting with her all night long. Astarion obviously wouldn’t waste a chance to be alone with Tav/Reader, takes her on a romantic stroll in the gardens and has his wicked way with her somewhere in a dark corner 👀

I can not make Ascnedant Astarion not dark I am SORRY but I can't help myself. The intro to this is sad bad, but honestly it gets pretty fun later down the line. Gotta set up that Stockholm syndrome. You gots it here.

Tw: Murder, Violence, not much but it is there, graphic smut, 18+ sweet dark fluff. I do consider this Stockholm on your end. Very inspired by the in-game quote of locking you away for a decade. Also, never write shit only in tumblr post editor, I lost half of this right before I was going to post last and it almost killed me

~

Astarion was.... aware that you'd been having a hard time as of late. If anyone could empathize with the complications of being a vampire spawn, it was certainly him. Even though his circumstance were obviously much, much worse than yours ever could be.

He was no Cazador. Astarion was different, he loved you. He knew what was best for you. All that needed to happen now was for you to accept it.

And in your defense, you were trying. It had taken a long time for you to finally come to terms with the full extent of power he had over you as his spawn. He would always know where you were through sensation alone. Always ready and willing to drag you back home if need be. He could compel you to his side at any moment, though he did have a bad habit of going out to find you during your little tantrums. It seemed to work better to put you in your place, especially since he had very little self-control when it came to who you associated with. Many a possible friend had died at his hand, in front of your eyes. A waste, really, one that wouldn't be necessary if you would just listen.

But the demonstrations had been useful. Slowly but surely you were learning that the option of secrets between the two of you had died the second he sunk his fangs into your wrist. He had personally put an official stop to all of your extracurricular activities. The things you used to do in your spare time were silly and dangerous, always going out of your way to help the undeserving. But now he had the control to stop you, to sequester you at the estate where you were safe.

You had nowhere to be besides his side and you were finally starting to understand that. Things were so much easier when you gave in and listened, happier and more fun.

Lately, it had almost felt like another honeymoon phase, with your sudden predilection for extreme loyalty. It helped that he could still see into your mind through the new connection, fully aware that your love remained real and pure, if not a bit melancholic. It was silly really, the guilt you felt towards him for letting him ascend. Never mind the thousands he sacrificed, you were too concerned with how power had chanced him.

It was cute. Stupid, but cute. Because obviously it had changed him for the better. How else would he be where he was now? With his hands already in nearly every major part of Baldur's Gate's governance? He had made wide, sweeping moves to gain control in the past year, banking on your dual hero status to deflect from his more... unsavory attributes. But it was working, and in a few years time this city would belong to him. Then the two of you would be on to the next major conquest. A future that you were just now coming to terms with.

And Astarion wanted to reward you for that acceptance. He had been a bit paranoid of late, paranoid enough to not let you out of the house for a solid fortnight. But for good reason. The last of the Gur had come out of the woodwork recently, looking for revenge for their children and fallen comrades. With a specific interest in you. It had made sense, in a way. You were his greatest weakness after all. So of course he had to take it upon himself to personally hunt the last of them down to tear them limb from limb.

But now they were officially gone, and he was finally feeling comfortable with letting you out into the world again. Just not out of his sight. And tonight was the perfect opportunity. He had a mandatory soirée to attend, populated by neighboring nobles and a few powerful foreigners. One that would be so much more entertaining with you willingly by his side. Or forced, if need be. Depending on if you decided to be in one of your moods, though they were a rarity nowadays.

But no, you turned out to be too excited at the prospect of leaving the house to even attempt being a brat. Astarion watched you with a smile as you appeared at the top of the staircase, dressed to the nines. He whistled as he watched you descend, beyond pleased with how you looked. He met you at the bottom of the landing, easily wrapping an arm around your waist before setting a quick kiss to your temple, "You look beautiful pet. Absolutely stunning."

You truly did. A navy satin gown that matched your skin tone perfectly, fitted with delicate straps and a low bodice. Perhaps the slit in the leg was a little high, revealing too much of your perfect thigh for the rest of the world. But you looked too good for him to complain.

You really were so gorgeous, could he be blamed for wanting to dress you up?

You rolled your eyes, but Astarion didn't miss the tiny smile dancing on your lips, "You're the one who picked it out."

"And you wear it perfectly," Astarion praised, already leading you out the door. He kept you close to his side during the short journey, his eyes darting around your surroundings every few moments. His paranoia had been quelled, but it hadn't completely died out. But he had already made the decision that he was going to be on his best behavior tonight, and that included not indulging in his protective nature. You deserved nothing less.

But that didn't stop Astarion from taking some mental notes on those who stared at you too brazenly when you arrived. Part of him couldn't blame them, not when he could understand your thrall better than any one else. But the other, more fun part of himself was too busy imagining ripping them apart for the audacious, lustful stares.

But he didn't drag the two of you out for strictly fun, a fact that he was quickly reminded of when you were approached by the main host, "Lord Ancunín! I'm so pleased that you could make it."

Astarion vaguely remembered who he was, though he was much more interested in his friends than the man himself. The man turned his attention toward you, brow raised, "And who is this beautiful creature?"

Astarion could feel his brow twitch at the insolence. How dare he not know who you were? The Hero of Baldur's Gate, his consort, the love of his life, how could someone of his breeding be so ignorant? You had to many titles to choose from for introductions, so Astarion decided on the most important, "This is the future Lady Ancunín, my fiancé."

He could feel you tense at his side, staring up at him with wide eyes like what he said was surprising. Which was odd. He had been extremely clear about his intentions since the day he ascended, marriage was the obvious next step for the two of you.

"Well it's lovely to meet you," The noble said with a smile, his attention going straight back to Astarion, "Now if you'll excuse us, I have a few matters to discuss with your future husband."

Astarion was startlingly close to hurting this man. What on earth made him feel as though he had the right to dismiss you? He tightened the arm he had around your waist, sneering at him, "There is nothing that you can say that she won't eventually know. Don't waste our time."

Then he proceeded to do just that, wasting Astarion's time with useless information and worthless attempts at allyships. It seemed to be an unfortunate trend as the night progressed, just reinforcing how utterly useless the gentry could really be. Not to mention their constant passive dismissal of you. He really was going to need to start letting you out more often, though he had to wonder if they were even worthy of your presence. He would have been a bit more forceful regarding his own displeasure at their arrogance if you weren’t so distracting.

It was hard to hold onto his own indignation when you seemed so content. You were leaning into him the whole night, smiling softly through all of his inane conversations. Never failing to be adorably pleased at your introduction. It made Astarion want to fawn over you, alternating between whispering sweet nothings in your ear and sweeping you onto the dance floor. All of your pleased laughs and giggles music to his ears.

He kept you close all evening, never allowing you to wander past his sight. His arm stayed firmly around your waist, never quite shaken off after your first waltz together. But you didn't seem to mind. If anything you were glowing under the attention, happy in a way he hadn't seen for a long time. Too long. Beautiful enough for him to have the overly romantic thought that he never wanted the night to end.

Even after he had done his rounds, engaged with all whom he had planned on, he wasn't quite ready to leave. They had all been dreadfully dull, but at least a few conversations would prove useful in the future at the very least.

He started to steer you towards the back garden doors, whispering in your ear, "Take a walk with me?"

You followed him easily, happy to leave the bustle of the ballroom and step into the coolness of the night. You both started walking, hand and hand in a comfortable silence. It was a pretty enough garden, hedges and ivy lining the walkways, a white slightly weathered gazebo placed in the center.

"You know," You said eventually, as the two of you went up the gazebo steps. You leaned against the railing, looking at him with a coy smile, "I don't recall you ever proposing."

Astarion barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes as he crowded around you. It was an unnecessary question, considering how you would have no choice in the matter. But he was playing nice tonight. Astarion grinned at you, bracing his hands on the railing to cage you in his arms, "If you want a proposal, I'm more than happy to oblige."

"I do," You were playing with the lapel of his jacket, looking up at him through your lashes, "Sooner than later if you don't mind."

"Your wish is my command," Astarion murmured, shameless as he started to kiss along the line of your throat, "I'm proud of you pet. You've been an angel all night."

"You haven't given me much to complain about," You said with a small laugh, your breath hitching when his fangs scraped against your delicate skin, hard enough to make pinpricks of blood bubble to the surface.

"You know..." Astarion started, pulling back to look you in the eye. His voice gentle but serious, "It could always be like this. If you let it."

"I... I know," You admitted, biting on your lower lip as you struggled for the words, "I-I want that. I want you. Even if... it's like this."

Astarion would take offense at the subtle dig if it was anyone else. But with you? He was just happy that you were finally coming around, at long last willing to accept the fate he'd set for you.

"You have it," Astarion promised, tilting your chin up to press a light kiss to your lips, "For as long as I breathe my love, you're mine. And I'm yours-"

You kissed him before he could finish, wrapping your arms around his neck, forceful in a way that he had desperately missed. But you were pulling back too soon, your mouth swollen and your lipstick slightly smeared, smiling at him like the precious thing you were.

How could he resist?

"I think you deserve a reward for tonight my pet," Astarion said, leaning in to softly kiss along your jaw, "For being such a sweetheart."

His hands were wandering, already moving to pluck at the delicate straps of your dress, slowly teasing them to drop down your shoulders.

You made no moves to stop him as your eyes darted around the empty space, "H-Here? But what if someone sees?"

"Then I'll tear their eyes out and feed them back to anyone who stumbles on us," Astarion said simply, smiling at the way it made you laugh softly.

"Violence isn't always the answer you know," You said, your breath hitching as he lightly bit your neck. Your dress still slinking down all the while, "I thought we talked about that?"

"Perhaps," Astarion murmured, "But it seems to usually work in my favor."

He had already managed to slip the straps down enough to ease the way, brazenly tugging the fabric until your breasts spilled from the top. He leaned back in, taking the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth as you gasped; mewling when he began touching you, shamelessly pinching your nipples just to hear you whine.

He adored all your little noises, so easy to coax out of your mouth. He could feel his own cock pulsing in the confines of his trousers, the feeling getting worse and worse as you started to whimper.

Astarion let one of his hands travel further down, right through the slit in your gown. He traced the seam of your pussy through delicate lace, smiling into the kiss from how the simple touch had your hips pitching forward. He could feel you getting wet, already seeping through the fabric of your panties, your needy cunt already begging for his touch. And Astarion was more than happy to oblige.

He tore them from your hips, letting the tattered pieces fall unceremoniously to the ground before he started to rub his palm against your clit, more slick gushing out as you moaned.

You were clutching at his shoulders, panting into his mouth as he played with you. Your thighs tightened around his hand, your cunt wet enough to fill the air with messy, indecent sounds.

Whatever trepidation you had before was quickly dissolving, a small chant escaping your lips as you two kissed, Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me.

Astarion was more than happy to oblige.

"Hold onto me darling," Astarion ordered, giving you a split second to tighten your grip around his neck before he was lifting you in the air, settling you on top of the thick railing with your legs spread wide. He made quick work of taking his weeping cock out, rubbing it along the seam of your cunt as you moaned. And then he was pushing inside, the slide soaked and easy.

You felt so tight around him, tight and sopping wet as he started to fuck into you. He bent his head down, popping one of your hard nipples into your mouth as you cried out, your nails clawing into his shoulders. You wrapped your legs around his hips, trying to pull him in even closer, despite the fact that he was pressed deeply inside of you. Hitting all of your sensitive places.

He could tell that you were close, your whining getting more and more high-pitched by the second, your sweet cunt pulsing around his cock. Astarion started to rub at your clit again, at the perfect angle to make you tense up and cry out. And just like that you were squirting against his hand, breathing heavy as your orgasm ravaged through you.

Astarion grinned, popping off your breast to kiss your slack mouth. Naughty thing that you were, making a mess all over your fancy dress. He pulled back to look at you, debauched and panting, your pupils dilated at you stared up at him. You looked gorgeous, fucked out and perfect.

He started to fuck you harder, the erotic image was too much for his mind to handle. You where whining with each thrust, no doubt oversensitive as he roughly slammed into you. But you were a good girl, taking it without a single complaint as you held on for dear life, tears springing to the corners of your eyes. But lucky enough for you, you didn't have to wait long.

Astarion spilled inside of you with a drawn out moan, grinding circles into your cunt as you quivered. You pulled him in for another kiss, messily sliding your lips together as he filled you up. The two of you stayed like that for awhile, lazily kissing as he softened inside of you. It felt good, it felt right, the perfect end to a great night.

Astarion pulled out slowly, cooing at you as you gasped at the feeling. Your legs were still trembling as he set you back on the ground, bad enough for Astarion to wonder if he should just pick you up before you crumpled on the floor.

But first...

Astarion dropped to his knees, ignoring your surprised gasp as he spread your legs back apart.

"Hush darling," Astarion ordered as he pushed your dress back up, "Let me have a look at you."

Astarion was aware that he had gotten a little rough near the end there. It wouldn't be the first time he made you bleed during sex, nor the last. But he would hate to do so accidently. But no, your pussy looked perfectly healthy, if not a little swollen. Flushed and pink, your hole still twitching the slightest bit. The sight of your pussy all slick and red was nearly enough to make his mouth water.

"Spread your legs a little further pet," Astarion murmured, looking just to look. He gently added pressure to your shaking thighs until you complied, "That's it. Good girl."

His cum was already starting to leak out of you, the smallest bit of white making it's first appearance amongst your wet folds. No doubt it would be sliding down your legs soon enough. He could do something about that. But then again... the alternative sounded like too much fun.

Astarion stood back up with a smile, patting your pussy once before letting your dress fall back down, "Try to hold it in darling. We wouldn't want to make another mess, would we?"

You nodded slowly, still looking half out of it. A sweet, hazy look still plastered onto your face. You were already leaning in for another kiss, naturally desperate for more contact. Contact that Astarion was more than happy to give. He pulled you closer, kissing you deeply; your fingers tangling in his hair to pull him even closer. He wrapped his arms around your back, dipping his tongue between your lips as you dreamily sighed.

You pulled away first, to his displeasure, but you didn't go far. You rested your forehead against his, smiling softly with loving eyes, "Hi."

Astarion couldn't help but smile back, taking the time to tuck a wild piece of hair behind your ear, "Hello my treasure. Did you have fun tonight?"

"I think you know the answer to that," You giggled softly, "I'm not even sure I can walk."

That he did. And there would be many more nights like it. Though for now, he'd prefer to get you home. He felt a bit reluctant to parade you back out there for the masses eyes, so obviously debauched by his hands. No, the sight of you happy and flushed was for his eyes only. Your night would be ending here.

You squeaked as he swept you up in his arms, already muttering the magic for a portal under his breath. And just like that the two of you were gone, completely uncaring to give any good byes.

The two of you popped right into the entry hall of the estate, sudden enough to nearly scare a maid half to death. Astarion paid them no mind, too busy with carrying you upstairs to the sanctuary of your quarters.

You cuddled into his chest, looking up at him with a nervous look, "Did... Did I do good tonight?"

"Of course you did," Astarion cooed as he kicked the door to the bedroom open, trying to softly drop you on the bed, "Perfect creature that you are, what else could have possibly happened?"

But you didn't let go when he tried to pull back, clinging hard enough for Astarion to simply follow you. But he didn't mind, no he preferred you like this. Needy, wanting, and his. He twisted the two of your around, settling only when he had you laying on top of him. He would set a bath for the two of you later, but for now he was more than happy to lay here, watching as your tired to stay conscious. You always got so tired after sex, just one more silly thing that he was endeared by.

"I love you," You mumbled, your eyes falling closed, "Thank you for taking me tonight. For trusting me. I... thank you."

"I love you too darling," Astarion murmured back, kissing your forehead, "You get better by the day. I really am proud of you."

It was true. You were learning, adjusting. Give him a decade and you'd be completely immersed in your new life, all thoughts of useless things like "freedom" forgotten.

You were his. Until the end of time, you'd be together.

He'd make sure of that.

[cartoonistcoop]

ShortBox Comics Member Interview: Val Wise

Throughout the month of October, the Cartoonist Cooperative will be sharing interviews with members of the Co-op who have a new comic available at the ShortBox Comics Fair 2024! 

NOTE: The Cartoonist Cooperative is not affiliated, associated, authorized, endorsed by, or in any way formally connected with ShortBox.  

Today’s spotlight is Val Wise and their new comic for ShortBox, In Fair Verona.

We’d love it if you could introduce yourself and tell us about your background in comics.

Val Wise: I’m Val, I graduated from SCAD in 2018. I’ve illustrated a couple of YA graphic novels, and in the past few years I’ve started to become more confident with my own writing. This is my third year participating in the ShortBox Comics Fair.

Tell us more about your new comic?

VW: Here’s the blurb: Two girls enter the service of the Princess of All Blood. One is there to be loved, the other tormented, but strange circumstances have blurred the lines between the two.

In Fair Verona started with a script I wrote in August of 2023, but decided it might be too much to pitch anywhere. I came back to it a couple of months later and decided the fair would probably be the best place for it.

I didn’t have much intentional thought about themes or anything else while I was writing it, but I realized later on that it kind of perfectly encapsulates my struggles communicating with other people. But that’s all I’ll say there, lol.

Tell us about your creative process; how did you develop this comic and what are the steps you took to bring it to the final stage?

VW: The idea of wanting to do a possession story came first. I wanted to make a story about an “ugly” girl who possesses a “pretty” girl and then makes sure they can never switch back. But when I actually sat down to write it out, that idea very quickly changed.

After that, this comic appeared in my brain more fully formed than…anything I’ve ever made. I’ve never written anything that progressed so naturally with so few changes needed from my outline to the final product. A finger has curled on the monkey’s paw, because nothing I’ve tried to write since has come so easily!

Does a sense of audience, even if it’s just an audience of one, enter into your creative process? If yes, how so?

VW: I don’t really think about the audience while I’m writing. But, every step after, I think about it a lot! I have to spend so much time with all of the wild choices I made so quickly in a word document!

I get so in my head about my own decisions, and I have to force myself to not get bogged down in the worst ways my ideas can be interpreted. So, I do try my best not to think about the audience very much, though I do appreciate that people are often more generous than I give them credit for.

Read the rest of the interview HERE! And dont forget to check out the Shortbox Comics Fair to support these lovely creators!!

[awsugar]

tin hat fully on, completely convinced there's gonna be an album. that announcement was too extra to just be for ten tour dates. esp with the inclusion of the secretary character from the last tour. also i still just really don't think a band that made a song with the meaning of foundations would let that be their last ever song. either way so hyped the tour is coming.

im a little hesitant to say for sure i think there's an album because we've been through this before! foundations was over 2 years ago. when it. some out i was sure there would be an album. i've always been skeptical of new music but that sounds like the first song of an album like it HAS to lead into something else. but now the time for that has passed. i even thought that when the tour started and the swarm merch came out like surely one day we'll understand what all of this means! we still don't. and this clearly is something different. if this video was really reminiscent of the black parade concept or the caption wasn't like super. new lore that i don't really think has anything to do with tbp. i mean clearly it DOES. but it's obviously after. and i don't think it has anything to do with the patient obviously. that's just a completely separate part of the story. this black parade is clearly not like a death procession. it's a military band. same name different story. but i know that gerard has definitely connected the dots.

but anyway like before. there was a lot of stuff involved in the promotion of the last tour and nothing ever came of any of it. but it was at least some familiar imagery? like all of the teasing before the tour announcement that used an established witches alphabet. we're familiar with reapers and skeletons being associated with the band. and there was no explanation for any of the swarm stuff. a summoning was a huge thing but it made sense to announce their big us reunion tour. and it called back to their history.

but now! they've created their own alphabet. there are clear characters. characters, might i add, that gerard has clearly been working on for a while considering his outfits in the 2023 final leg being tests for this. and the outfit he wore at the last 2023 wwwy show being military. AND the whole caption that obviously has deep lore and stuff that we must be getting context for at some point if they went to all the trouble to do this and write it out and create this new concept. like what is MOAT what is DRAAG , who is the secretary character, did the 9/11 themed drum heads that went along with the outfits he wore tie into this? why is "long live" in quotations? is it because it's a new album title by the black parade? remember how canonically the black parade were an italian band? there are so many more questions created with this than there were with the things that went unanswered before. i can't even conceive of this now happening and us not getting answers. and i can tell it's not simply a black parade anniversary tour cut and dry and it will likely be SO different from wwwy. that was a tribute. this is different. this is a departure. a reimagining. i believe it.

[meabh-mcinness]

Hey-hey 👋

I'm absolutely in love with your writing for Narnia from M!IK!! Thank you so much for your work!

What do you think Narnia's courting human!reader will look like? Bonus points if it will be kinda rituals (since we know Naberius clan is connected with dogs 😉)

If you feel uncomfortable with that request you can ignore it, it's ok 👍

Hihi!! No, thank you so much for reading it! I'm glad you enjoyed it! I thought about waiting to start this till the big 'betrayal' of the Deviculum arc was revealed, but it'll be a two-week hiatus till the new crowns are revealed, much less that big boy of a thing. So here it is anyway!

This was written from the POV of an Iruma's parent reader, but if anyone also wants one of a non-Iruma associated reader, just let me know!

Narnia Courting a human!reader (spoilers for up to chapter 197 ahead!)

First, knowing what we know now about his feelings for humans, I honestly don't think he would have considered it in the beginning. This old dog would probably fight tooth and nail at first to deny it.

But once he admits to himself he likes you? You're in for a ride.

I'm thinking you first met at the Deviculum, having been invited as the daughter of Sullivan and as another 'guard' for Amaryllis, and he was disguised as Fenrir 'Fen-chan'.

At first, while he had set you on edge, you had simply thought him a funny little dude who had a thing for dog shaped hand gestures. And with a name like Fenrir it had been easy to write off the dog like qualities as wolf ones, probably descended and named after the Norse mythology wolf.

And so, despite your feeling, you had laughed at his jokes and little quips and thrown some back easily.

Until he scared your son.

Then all bets had been off.

You were no 13 crown head of lust, but you were a parent too. A parent who also had fangs and nails, as blunt as they may be in comparison, and was more than willing to throw down with a border patrol demon for your child.

Narnia hadn't been impressed with Iruma's quick submission, simply affirming what he thought of humans being too weak to be allowed in the Netherworld at all, much less in positions of power, but you?

You had done a complete 180 from how you acted before. The second he had leaned in to get closer to Iruma, you were suddenly there with all the rage and fire of any demon parent he had ever seen before.

Eyes that had been shinning prettily in awe of the ball were now narrowed in on him, lips pulled back in a snarl and tiny canines bared at him. Threats fired off without a second thought.

(His personal favourite was when you threatened to rip his tail off and shove it down his throat)

If he hadn't known better, he would have thought he was looking at a demon returned to origins with the feral look in your eyes.

And he was absolutely certain, that if Amaryllis hadn't stepped in and slapped him, shocking you out of that state of mind, you might actually have tried to lunge at him.

He fell in love at that moment.

Though he wouldn't realize it till later. Still reeling that a human had acted so much like a demon.

So he starts looking into you more carefully once the whole Deviculum thing is over.

Approaches you as Narnia, rather than Fenrir, so that he can get the full picture of who you are, without the negative feelings of the Deviculum in the way.

You had known it was the same person anyway from his mannerisms, the dog hand symbol he occasionally made, even in Narnia mode, was hard to forget.

The more he got to know you, though, the more he was he fell and eventually conceded that yes, humans weren't so weak, and also yes he wanted this particular human.

And once he did, he would waste no time trying to initiate a courtship.

I fully believe that demons follow courtship rituals that start with offerings.

Something meant to entice and say 'hey I'm an option, look at me' and if accepted, delve into gifts on why they would be such a good choice and spend time together.

In ancient times, this was usually a kill of some sort to prove they can provide. Nowadays, in modern times, that was far less likely and was generally more tailored to the couple in particular.

His first gift is actually an apology for the way he acted and a promise to protect both you and Iruma from any future harm.

His second gift, given right after you accepted his apology, was a circular hair brooch with two sticks chained to it, made from a material that looked most closely to rainbow obsidian.

The brooch part had an intricate design that looked quite close to Kalego's seal only with different characters, that likely spelled Narnia's name instead.

The two hair sticks had wolf heads attached where the chains met the stick. All in all it was a gift to say that you were claimed by him and therefore an attack on you was an attack on him. A rather forward gift, usually given later on in courtships, but that he felt was right. (And since you’re human, you can use it to call him when needed)

He gives plenty of other gifts too over the courtship period, from other pieces of jewellery (he custom ordered earpieces that covered the roundness of yours to give the illusion of pointed ones), to clothes in both Naberius and your favourite colours, to treats, to books, and your plenty of items to do with your favourite hobbies.

It’s canon that he has an exceptionally good nose, even among demons, and being a dog demon I firmly believe he absolutely loves and adores your scent.

So don't expect any perfumes or cologne from him.

Unless it's made from his scent, like Sullivan's pheromone perfume, so that he can indulge in inhaling the beautiful mixture your two scents combined would make.

(I personally think he smells something along the lines of a rose but darker and more dangerous, if that makes sense, and also smelling of sandalwood, parchment, and ink. Take that as you will.)

He's big on scenting you the natural way, too. Nuzzles and cuddles galore, especially when he's been away for a while.

Running his nose, and rubbing his face into your neck, was a common occurrence once you had given the go ahead.

Being in the Border Patrol and as a 13 Crown, he doesn't have a lot of spare time, so texts or letters are probably a common thing as well. Especially when he's been sent on a spy job.

While Kalego is the silent acts of service, gift giving and quiet quality time type, Narnia is much more into physical touches, quality time and words of affirmation type.

In other words, he will always be touching you and wanting praises. I wasn’t kidding about the nuzzles and cuddles galore.

With how strict the Naberius household is, I don’t think they’d be too big on touching, and doing well isn’t praiseworthy but expected. Not exactly the healthiest of households to grow up in,

Plus, I'm betting that he had to raise Kalego while also doing his schooling and training, since it doesn't look like there was a mom in the picture, their uncle is canonically lazy, and their dad was probably working like 24/7, and when he wasn't, he was training them. Bloody hell no wonder he snapped

So he craves the touch of another a lot, much like Shichirou.

I genuinely think that if the Naberius house had given them even a bit more freedom, he'd probably be somewhere in between how Clara and Shichirou acts. Not quite as in your face as Clara is, but a little more energy than Shichirou has.

But because he is trained so well in the Naberius way, he probably won't do much more than hand holding or hand on your back for PDA.

Alone, however, he's all over you. Using you as a headrest when you're cooking, head in your lap while you read, wrapped around you while you sleep, playing with your hair, letting you play with his hair

By the gods, his hair

His hair is the epitome of silkiness (minus the horn-like cow-licks, which are surprising hard yet still feel like hair. Just like over gelled hair feels, probably)

While you're courting, he will let you do whatever you want with it because he loves the feeling of your fingers carving paths through the strands, nails scratching his scalp pleasingly. It's one of his favourite things to just sit between your legs, while looking over case files, or reading, or even just laying there and just let you do your thing, whether it's a simple braid or an elaborate design.

He usually falls asleep to this, by the way.

Speaking of case files, he'll occasionally ask you for your thoughts on them.

This got so long, I had to create a new text box, oh gods. Did you know there's a 4096-character limit per text box? Because I just learned that, and now you did too!

Having your literal out of this world thinking has solved far more things than he would like to admit, but he's also so damn proud? Because yes, that's his partner solving these cases that no one else had been able too. (He constantly gets in trouble with Henry for sharing confidential info. He does not care and continues to do it.)

I also headcannon that Narnia can sing and dance will often do so for you.

Can hold long notes like a wolf howls, so very long.

Will just randomly pull you into his arms, humming a tune, and dance with you.

Also, while you're courting, he will be both surprisingly helpful and absolutely useless with Iruma. He's already raised Kalego, so he thinks he can raise a human teen too.

He's dead wrong.

So, so wrong.

But he tries, and it leads to a lot of funny moments.

(Kalego is horrified that his most troublesome student and co-worker has a very real potential of being a part of his family, but also secretly pleased)

Listen, Narnia's also pretty much confirmed as returned to origins, or at least heavily implied. The only reason he is drifting back to your side is because Baal's group would 100% hunt you for sport, along with other things.

Obviously, he can not have this. So Baal's group has to go. However, that means that all those instincts he's been letting lose? They have to be channelled somewhere, and they are. On you.

He will definitely have some yandere tendencies, is what I'm saying.

Gotta know where you are and who you're with. Needs to know your schedule by heart, and any deviancies will give him a heart attack.

Literally hates the fact that you're always surrounded by others, and he almost never gets alone time. But is also happy and proud that you're so needed and an integral part of so many demon's lives.

Tries to get you on your own so much, but you literally have the entire staff of Babyls, the misfit class, several crowns, and the three greats wanting your attention. Oh, and one deity because of course Toto wants to know all the stories and knowledge you have from the human world too, not just Iruma's.

Has thought about just straight kidnapping you and Iruma (because you wouldn't be happy without him, and he may or may not have grown attached to the little blue bean) on several occasions, but almost every single one of these beings is high ranked and 100% would hunt him down for you because of course they are.

Also thought about trying to convince you to join Border Patrol so that you could go on cases together, therefore able to keep an eye on you and spend more time together. But you enjoyed working at Babyls, and there's no way Henry would allow a human to join.

So he takes what he can get, but will pout and occasionally honest to gods whimpers when you have to separate.

He takes this out on captured prisoners. They thought he was bad before, now he's got feelings, and they're going to understand real quick what real no mercy feels like.

May or may not have tried to convince you to return to origins with him at one point, but a quick whack with the school's newspaper said what you thought of that.

In conclusion, he is a feral dog who is only tame for you.

I have more I could shove in this, but it's already so long and so all over the place ಥ ͜ʖಥ

[byghostface]

//long rambling

There is a vent in the last part (about pro ship:/+ wired shipping + block list) it's naturally negative so reading at your own risk.

So in the new Batman and Robin issue #7 Nika's sister making an appearance, got me thinking of other possibilities for sibling characters to come back.

Mostly I’m thinking about Respawn since he is Joshua Williamson's own character. And He made Respawn appeared in the last issue of Robin(2021), he also brought back Mara in that run too (just some appearance in the later issue).

And now Joshua Williamson is writing Batman and Robin, so naturally he can bring some characters back in this run. He had said in an interview that he might have figured out a way(try) to bring back Maya.

Throwback to 2022 of this old wip/art I made, is about what I think the emo teens of Lazarus squad dynamic would look like.

I imagine Nika and Respaw are irritated/tolerate with each other but would stay for Damian because Nika is Damian's girlfriend and they want to stick together. Meanwhile, Damian likes to include his half-brother in some fun activities (Respawn is acting reluctant bc of his own issues but he actually likes to have friends and feel include).

I haven’t finished this art bc I was going to add more wips (with other characters like Rose and Hawke) to make it a post. I didn't finish this art back then bc I was afraid Talia fans would be mad at me for drawing Respawn.

Trust me, I hate that Talia gets associated with Deathstroke like this, but I think Respawn is a confused/mistreated teen character and Damian (bless his heart and soul) still wants to be his brother regarding the whole mess. I will explain/talk more about my thoughts on Respawn as a character and his situations once I finish these drawings and get ready to post them.

Writing/typing words is harder than drawing for me personally. Drawing is like channeling my energy into a picture and forming an atmosphere and hopefully people will understand what thoughts and feelings I was trying to convey. Writing is using more brain powers to choose the correct and cohesive words, so people would not misunderstand what I'm talking about. Especially when English is not my first language, and even so I normally don't talk(write) much in my mother tongue either…(I'm not a quick thinker, it took me a longer time to think things through, writing literally exhausted me physically and mentally more than drawing.)

It doesn't mean I don't enjoy writing, it's just not my first choice to convey thoughts… but considering I can't draw everything I have in my mind and it takes even longer time to finish any art, I just need to write down things first from now on. Tumblr is the only place I can think of that has this longer text feature blog post and I'm more familiar with this platform format. So I will still be here posting my fan content.

.

(↓Vent, if you want to avoid being block by me then read down below.)

I must say I will forever hate respawn x flatline as ship, cus I know who started this ship and their reasons behind it—Don’t let the new character develop naturally as the story goes, let’s put them in made-up weird situations first so I can prop up my own ship!😍 And get both of the new characters out of the way, since no one would defend them so I can fanon the hell out of them by making them look bad all around!🤞 (What if I stone you first hand🪨🪨💥)

And I will continue to dislike/against any shipping Damian's sibling to Nika. I simply don't like the unnecessary sibling conflict just for romance tropes! So go away boooo I hate you‼️ Not to mention the ignoring of different age range multi-ship hide behind poly… that's straight up proshipping I hate you even more!!👎

Also for people who said Nika should be crush on Damian's mother instead of him… I hate you twisted proshipper rotten smooth brain‼️‼️ She dating a boy her age and has mutual connections with him, why would she crush on her boyfriend's mother instead?? Just because Nika is a big fan of Talia??? So you telling me young ppl can't idolize adults normally without being labeled as romantic nowadays huh??( Not saying you can't crush on adults, but why crush on your boyfriend's mom? ) Your weird ass mind is showing with this ass hc be fr. Again, why would you imagine that? You just wanted to push a fake narrative of Nika being wired so you could have an excuse to make Talia and Damian dislike her (which is not true), but in fact is YOU are the weird one projecting your twist thoughts/hate onto Nika‼️💥🪨🪨

I will start to block ppl who are shipping/liking respawn x flatline (+proshipper) and STILL interact with me, read the room!! My art is not for you weirdos‼️Go away BOOOO💥 🪨🪨🪨💥💥

Can't believe I need to type this all out cuz some of you weirdos will still do these things and think is okay to interact with me and my post/showing in my notifications BOOO👎🪨🪨💥🪳🪳🪳🩴🩴🩴

(sorry for venting about random weirdos/Nika haters again, and thanks for reading.)

[seeing--is--believing]

"So far in what could loosely be called your life, you have made a living watching others. Society would call you an informant. a rat, a snitch, I call you unworthy of the body you possess, of the life you have been given."

Hello. I am Michael. I don't want to be on this app but I was told it'd be a good place to connect with others like myself, start new bonds, possibly "have fun". I don't know what to say here. I am 30 exactly, I'm a male and I own a hamster named Rusty who has one eye, I don't like loud people and I like to sleep.

Talk to me if you want, I won't stop you but I don't want any weird stuff. I'll ignore you. It's easy.

Hi! Back at it again, making another blog. If you guys don't know me, I'm Richie, he/him, a gay trans man with a love for horror movies, video games and photography! I own @riotsnrebellion, @nintndo64, @metalhead-painter and my main blog is @1nervegas1. This blog is extra special to me as Michael is my absolute fav character ever.

Going through the usual warnings of talk of violence, gore, sexual themes, drug addiction and self destructive behaviors, so if that's not your thing? You've been warned for it

Im okay with shipping and nsfw asks! Im all up for oc x canon, canon x canon and rarepairs! Just message me beforehand so we can discuss the ship!

Some more info on him because hes not too talkative about himself just yet: Michael is a cisman, he goes by he/him and he's also bisexual (something he struggled with when he wasa teen), after a particularly bad drug charge and while he was trying to go through therapy for those with addiction, he had the choice of either becoming a police informant or having more charges dropped onto him by non other than Eric Matthews, so he picked the 1st option, no matter how much he disliked it. He spent most of his childhood looking after his younger sister, Madeline, so she's really the only person he trusts fully. Michael isn't one to open up too easily, but he'll try his best. JUST as he was getting better, he was grabbed by jigsaw. He goes to the survivors meetings but hardly speaks, he also wears a set of rounded shades to hide his missing eye

More info on him and his backstory can be found HERE! (once I get to work on writing the post)

TAGS THAT COULD BE USED ON THIS BLOG!

-#👁️‍🗨️>MICHAEL CHATS (interactions/rp)

-#💬>MICHAEL TALKS (hisbown posts/rambles)

-#‼️>MICHAELCORE (things I associate with him

-#🔃>MICHAEL REBLOGS (self explanatory)

-#<❗HEADCANON❗>

#🥁>RICHIE RAMBLES (ooc)

[ride-thedragon]

How would you write Nettles in the season if it was you adapting it? Curious to hear your thoughts and how would you introduce her character,

Oh my goodness.

Thank you for giving me this platform.

HOW I WOULD WRITE NETTLES IN S2.

Episodes 1 - 3

First thing, we introduce her as an Alladin/ Robin Hood character. Demonize the greens and by proxy Viserys for all I care, but Nettles isn't just starting to be hungry. She steals and does it well but is moral about it. Go the easy route and have her share with a kid, or teach a child how to get clams or even leave all the coins she does have for bread. She can have a job or two, but she has a need to provide for more than herself because she was a kid once.

We also see her selling Addam goat. They seem closer than strangers. Like he sees her often enough. She even gives him her congratulations on Alyn returning

Later on, we see that she is a bar maid as well this time with a little less clothes but a face veil. We get the notion that she doesn't like it, but she has to work two jobs because people pay her less due to the scar. The boys can see her again, or someone can allude to the idea that she's never in the same place in a day. They don't know much about her.

Episodes 4-6

We meet her washing blood of her hands from killing and bleeding a sheep. First job introduction for the goat selling. We see Nettles has a place in the Driftmark eco system. She's a member of their society, scar and all. Have people condescend about her, be like she was a thief, look at the scar, but I made her into what she is. She doesn't have that connection to anyone.

Then after that, we see her wandering, just behind people on to grass, then unto a hill with a pan down of a sheep in between the time for both jobs. And we all know why but we will leave it be for now.

Episodes 7 to 8

News about Addam reaches her, and all of a sudden, she looks scared. The first full dialogue with get from her is about what they are doing with the seeds who do that. If he's okay and then she hears about the sowing. Someone says Sheepstealer kills anyone he comes near, so they don't understand why people try. She tries to fight back a smile, but you can tell she's fond of something in the conversation.

We see the same motion. This time, we see the origin of the sheep as one she 'borrows' from another butcher or a run away sheep from herding and carries it up to feed the dragon. She's talking to him like a person as he eats, and you hear someone coming up on another side. She hides in the cave behind her (she clearly trusts this dragon). we see Sheepstealer massacre a random seed with Cannibal and when Cannibal tries to sniff out Nettles, he gets really defensive.

Cannibal flies of and Nettles kind of feel the bond build, he heels, and she climbs on her boy for their first flight, but we don't see her at the table with the seeds.

She's the last claimer in the narrative and yet very undecided on what that means or what to do, We hear her curse for the first time, and the season closes out.

So yeah, she'd be kinda subdued and away because she does exist at a lot of intersections in the narrative. I'm tying to Addam for the bastard association, but we never hear it from her, giving us the mysterious parentage arc. She starts to claim Sheepstealer early because he's on a quicker route to work that people clearly don't take, and it makes it easier. She can tell he's hungry, too. That's where the smart and fearless association comes from. She isn't foul-mouthed just yet, but cursing on dragon back is a great way and reason to be labelled. I think that's how you do it.

[jev-urisk]

(Late) WIP Wednesday ✍️

Heeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyy~ Who wants to come be a little distracted today? Here, I've got a slice of my progress for 🌐7 Circles🌐 for yall! This comes from Chapter 9, Tea Party, Kazimier POV.

It had made for a damn dull time. The past two weeks had felt like a cheese grater to the forehead. The same, the same, the same. The same closet-prison-room with no knob, no vents, no popcorn ceiling- just five white surfaces grounded by short commercial carpet. Who would have guessed that gettin’ collared and shipped across the whole of Halkyon would be so.. stale. It had been a relief initially- just because Kazimier didn’t need sleep didn’t mean he wasn’t exhausted after the clusterfuck of tribulations that led him to that closet. So yes, it HAD been nice to sit in familiar darkness that very first night, to stare at that blank door and let his mind sift through all the events that passed and all the events that were waiting right around the corner. That comfort faded quick though- each day felt too much like the last. It was the first time in a long while that Kazimier fuckin’ wished he slept like others do. After dissecting whatever each day dealt him, his mind could only spin in the dark white box and the same 8-or-so hours always felt like 16-or-so hours when the door finally opened again and Klaus reluctantly ordered him up and out. And that- that reluctance. It was an unseeable wound in the man, festering with each barked order and slowly bleeding out until every action was beautifully stained by it. It wasn’t reluctance over letting Kazimier out, or being associated with such a ‘Lower’ as 4th-class hybrid, or even the burden Nexi squawk on about over teaching a criminal to be a ‘respectable citizen’. Ha! Kazimier would love to meet a being capable of making him respectable. No. No.. the reluctance seemed to be over forcing Kazimier to do things, over acting like the owner. Nexi loved orderin’ lowers around like they loved unpronounceable cheeses. Klaus didn’t. He started strong, sure, all- ‘I had to put you in my own clothing’, and ‘This is your final warning’, and ‘your place is either behind me, or at my feet.’ with a curious heat to his voice. He started strong but couldn’t keep up that strength for the life of him- and it’s only been two weeks. How mortal-minded..

I have a new job that's taking up a lot of my brain right now but once I settle in I'm sure I'll be back to the usual posts (and getting around to the small stack of asks in my inbox!). I hope you all are staying safe, and connecting with your communities this week.

7C Taglist: @gioiaalbanoart @biblicallyaccuratefruitbat @lychhiker-writes @autism-purgatory

@wyked-ao3 @cowboybrunch @zackprincebooks @smellyrottentrees @tragedycoded

@aalinaaaaaa @the-golden-comet @quillswriting @nbkuhn @ddgraywrites

@desastreus @theglitchywriterboi @shanakin-skywalker @honeybewrites @sincerelydorky

@the-letterbox-archives (Hmu to be +/- to this Taglist!)

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s4 episode 17 thoughts

hey guys. i need answers…. i need them.

but i have a strict “one episode a day” and “post the thoughts from last episode before starting the new one” rule and!!! i must follow the rules.

i wish this episode relied less on the assumption that the audience knows how planes work. but. i digress.

back to who i was before this episode....

a lot of you may know that it is scully and mulder time. 

ohhhh i’m reading the episode description and i see what is going on here… a two parter!!! well, i am prepared to handle this, yes i am. we have been due for a two parter, so i look forward to learning about this UFO.

let us open with a pretty shot of the sky… we are somewhere over upstate new york… a good place to be

in a plane. this guy seems drunk. i do not care for how he looked at this woman.

“you could fly every day for the next 26,000 years before you’d have an accident”, says drunk guy that will most certainly manifest a plane crash

shaggy redhead sitting next to drunk man seems very afraid of the dude on the back of the plane in a suit. uh oh! let me guess…. alien bounty hunter?

(author's note: nah. it was a good guess, though!)

suit man just locked himself in the bathroom and pulled out the spring in a pen to a dramatic flourish. is the pen spring supposed to indicate something to me? because i do not associate them with danger.

oh! he made a little gun out of pieces. huh. kinda neat. even if it is terrifying. just from a DIY perspective.

sometimes i forget that before 9/11 you could just do stuff on planes and no one really gave a damn

but now the plane is shaking. man with gun is watching all the screaming and jostling go down. redhead seems very scared while bright lights shine into the plane. oh! and then a window/door thing gets sucked outside??

deeply unfortunate.

(cue spooky intro)

WAIT! we are at a restaurant with mulder and scully and someone is bringing out a cake??? and they are singing happy birthday to her!!! oh my gosh, is it her birthday or is this a ploy by mulder to get free cake?

“I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY, SCULLY” <- JDHDJJDJD IS HE REALLY ABOUT GETTING THAT FREE CAKE LIFE????

no, no, it IS in fact dana scully's birthday, a remarkable occasion indeed. however. there is no funnier thing than faking a birthday to get cake at a restaurant. and maybe i need to write that fic someday.

oh my gosh, she says he has never once remembered her birthday, so he says something about it being the way he likes to celebrate them, every 4 years...... THIS IDIOT 😭😭

i cannot believe this man... he can remember any myth he read when he was 11, but he cannot keep his best friend's birthday in his head. and while that is a tragic flaw and indication of his ahab-ness, the fact that he knew scully was sick so he stepped it up still says a lot.

oh he brought a GIFT shut up!!!!!! and he pulls out a tiny little box... she says “oh you have GOT to be kidding me” and he jokes about turning the alien implants into earrings but it’s an apollo 11 keychain 😭😭😭 STOP this is so sweet!!!!! oh my gosh he wanted to make sure she knew she was loved 

(her birthday is in february so i’m not sure i see the connection to her and apollo 11 beyond her being a general nerd, and i think her birth and the moon landing happened in the same year, but i digress)

someone is talking to them! “oh promise me this isn’t leading to something embarrassing” she says <- HDHSJDHJE 

but no! this woman- sharon- confesses to have followed them there??? well that is very creepy. and that she was told to talk to them if something happened.

GIRL!!!! LET HER HAVE A NICE DINNER 😭

sharon says that her brother, max fenig, was bringing them something that night, but the plane he was on went down.

and how did he know where they were going to be? i am going to assume that he is simply a stalker and not that mulder arranged for a UFO information exchange on scully's birthday. no ma'am. i refuse.

(also, i was distracted by mulder chewing on something this whole scene. at first i thought it was a cigarette, but then clearly it wasn’t, so maybe a lollipop? looked too big to be a toothpick. oh god, don’t tell me he’s a toothpick guy)

anyway. plane crash time. let's go to the conference where the plane people discuss such news.

initial reports say no survivors. people are smoking in here which is crazy. i understand that this show takes place in the 90's, but sometimes i lowkey forget until i see stuff like that and go ohhhhh right right.

this has been a sad turn to date night!!!

they’re listening to the last audio recording from the plane, and the pilot is yelling “my god!” and “mayday!” which is not inspiring any warm and fuzzy feelings

so mulder asks if there was any evidence that the plane was intercepted, because we heard the voice say it was, but plane guy who is in charge of this meeting says hmm, nope, not that i know of.

(is the pilot saying that there was an interception.... not evidence... of an interception??)

mulder says well, there was a famous alien abductee on the plane. which gets the crowd giggling.

scully is watching like ohhh my god and when plane guy asks if this is an official FBI position he turns and looks to her and then says no. plane guy says he is trivializing this tragedy. WHICH I DISAGREE WITH!

IF there was a man claiming to be abducted by UFOs, and the plane he was on mysteriously went down, and the pilot said it was intercepted, but for some reason the fact that the pilot SAID THAT is being disregarded- i'm sorry, my red flags would be going off. for multiple different reasons. if i were plane guy i'd be thinking, gee, maybe this max character was a government target- i mean, if he got famous off of UFOs, who is to say he wasn't up to more shady activities? maybe he was planning a coup in the dominican republic, or smuggling government secrets of a nature that is still important but less outlandish than UFOs, or embezzling, etc. all i am saying, from my reasonable skeptic point of view, is i would think hmm, that's odd. we'll have to note that for our investigation, mr. mulder. maybe max was targeted for a specific reason, aliens or no aliens.

of course, this plane guy claims there WAS no max fenig on the plane, but it seemed pretty easy to lie pre-TSA

“sure know how to make a girl feel special on her birthday” HDHJSJDKSJDJDJDJDJ 

nooo... i feel bad for birthday scully :( why is he always up to some sort of alien shenanigans instead of cherishing her? :( i GET it, i get his life's mission, etc etc but cherishing your friends should be mandatory, especially when it is a friend as lovely as scully

at the crash site, things are looking very very very sad. many bodies are in bags. 

but where is the plane??

poor scully has to shout due to all the helicopter noises, which had to be a pain to film.

what would finding max fenig prove? mulder doesn’t know. but perhaps that 1 life was worth sacrificing 133 others. 

damn. that’s a downer. and we started on such a high note!!!!

the guy who had the DIY gun on the plane has been entirely cut in half. but one of the people from the IIC (and what the hell even IS the IIC?) took his gun!! it was the guy with the big mustache! and they’re spraying him with some stuff? that can’t be normal practice, can it?

scully sees a watch on a corpse’s arm :( mulder sees some glasses :(

they each find a watch!! and the watches from the victims say 8:01, but the time of the crash was listened as 7:52!!!! so… what is the truth??

“nine minutes, scully. do you remember the last time you were missing nine minutes?” <- is that a rhetorical question or a throwback to the pilot

mulder seems to think now that perhaps max was on the plane, but did not finish the journey with the rest of the passengers… hmm… like they shot him??? what do you mean, cryptic man???

oh! one of the people from the crash is alive!!! get a medic NOW!!!! scully is here!!!!! she is telling you what he is going to need and you had better get it quick!!!

now scully is waiting for a plane in the cold. what!!! she is cold!!!! get her inside!!!

she was waiting for sharon from before, who brought all of her letters from her brother max. scully says that they think she isn’t telling them everything, and that she had better do so. NOW. she is not messing around.

oh!!!! the man who was alive has burns that are associated with a high level of radiation!! see, i assumed he just was hit by a piece of flaming sky junk. that foreshadowing went right over my head. 

it was drunk man from before who was burnt!!! so is it whatever max had on him that was radioactive??? they confirm that it was max, he was just using a pen name, which he had a lot of. 

max worked at job with plutonium and uranium. well. maybe that could do it. not sure what he’d to do with all that or how it got on a plane. maybe it could have caused the crash.

mulder is launching into his “max HAD to have been abducted” theory and about how no one will ever believe him and it will go unsolved forever. scully keeps trying to cut him off…

max is back!!!! where from???

oh. he is dead. that is how they found him.

mulder still doesn’t think the crash is explained.

sigh. you just want to have a nice birthday dinner with the guy you've thought was cute for the last 4 years, and he never once remembered your birthday until now, but then he gets an alien call and slips into ahab mode. scully has truly suffered so much.

sharon is reading many many many letters when a flashing and shaking occurs!!! more aliens???? oh man. this is intense. 

CUT TO BLACK??? rude as hell. where did sharon go!!!

(i think i know where sharon went)

okay, now mulder is walking among the many bodies recovered from the crash scene. he finds max and unzips him. and in his pocket he had mulder’s business card!!! despite it being covered in blood, he puts it in his pocket, and seems very sad. it cannot be an easy thing to see. but still. blood-borne illnesses, man.

he is now unzipping more and more bodies. what do you think, you beautiful tortured man?

he is furious that the IIC is going to claim that they don’t know what went on. and i still don't know what the IIC is. maybe they don't even know about the alien stuff. not everyone has CSM levels of alien knowledge.

(side note... why do you think deep throat was snitching to mulder?? was it part of CSM's plan, or did the fight? was it toxic old man yaoi?)

back to the matter at hand. “mulder, why can’t you just accept the facts?” (with his hand on her back, walking her away) “because there are no facts, scully. what they’re telling you, what they’re going to report, they’re the opposite of facts- a claim to ignorance of the facts” oh man, he’s yapping! but he has a point.

“claimed steadfastly, ignorance becomes as acceptable as the truth” <- he’s lowkey right though… he ate with that one thing

still pissed he cannot remember birthdays.

he points out that all of the watches have been stolen that show the difference in 9 minutes between the reported and the actual crash time!!! and that somehow they need to figure out what happened in those 9 minutes. hmm. is this a possible task?

well, with a rental car, you can go anywhere, including to this military base.

oh no!!! someone already came and asked this military man (later revealed to be named louis frish) about the crash, the night it happened! oh no… someone else has a lead

hmm….. hmm…. some discrepancies in stories are occurring here. it must be CSM.

uh oh... the minute they leave, louis frish says to his buddy that he told them “what he was supposed to say”… there is STRANGENESS afoot!!! this other guy says if they come back, he’s gonna tell them the truth.

back to the motel…. well, sharon is no longer there!!! surely you recall the lights and the shaking, etc etc! the landlord seems to think that she trashed the room and dipped, and is telling our agents they MUST pay for it. she was making her 5 seconds of screen time COUNT.

“okay scully, hit me with your best shot, what do you think happened here?” (deep sigh) “i haven’t a clue” <- i love when they admit they don’t know wtf is going on. i think it’s very endearing.

plane guy shows up!!! mulder is being snippy with him about the lack of evidence, but he comes with evidence in hand!!! he won’t make an announcement though, because he’s afraid he’ll sound as crazy as mulder. woah… plane guy redemption arc??

the plane had wear and tear marks, but the gag is it was a brand new plane!!! and all of the cracks radiate from the door they think was blown off!!!

big shoutout to mulder for trusting his door launching instincts. 

back at the air force base….. the one guy who said he was gonna snitch has a bullet hole in his head!!! and three cars are rapidly approaching!!! including one with shady mustache man who was spraying drunk guy’s body!!!

louis frish is hiding on the roof. hmm. hope they don't climb up there to check.

mulder is rocking back and forth, listening to the audio from the flight. then he busts out a rotary phone and spins it with great determination. another forcible reminder of the 90's. also, him rocking back and forth was funny. it was giving old man on a porch energy.

he’s calling scully!! she sounds very sleepy and points out that they have been up for over 36 hours, but he asks if she can please come over, as he thinks he has heard this voice before

yayyy, they can say they know who the voice belongs to, and then fall asleep all cuddled up <3 and everyone lived happily ever after- the end!

NO!!! when she gets out of her room, someone GRABS HER!!! this guy is closing her mouth and saying not to scream, which really makes a person want to scream more, i can imagine.

it’s louis frish??? saying he caused the plane crash???

girl. i was ready for some snuggling.... gtfo with this nonsense.

ooooookay, so it was frish whose voice they heard on the recording! frish says he was ordered to lie about what happened to the flight…. and now he’s fessing up that he saw a second aircraft shadowing it, then an explosion, then the disappearance. 

plane guy is saying that this guy must be a liar. but mulder says there has to be a THIRD aircraft, shot down by the intercept aircraft, which caused this crash. so there has to be a second crash site.

man, i was still thinking about them cuddling, but sure. sure, we have 3 aircraft now. i'm getting lost but i'll just roll with it.

plane guy says that if there is a second crash site they need to find it. i cannot get a read on him. also, frish the whistleblower needs to be kept somewhere safe because the military is clearly gonna kill him.

time to head out…. but cars are approaching!!! can a man who hasn’t slept in 36 hours do a high speed chase? well, he sure can, but the question is more about the ethics than the actual possibility. 

mulder’s crazy idea is to drive straight into a landing plane which just BARELY works and scully straight up was looking death in the face. 

plane guy goes to the OG crash site and sees a UFO!!! it has a beam it is scanning down on the wreckage!!!! he seems entirely gagged and runs towards it, which is not what i would do in that situation. i would be hiding. and then it wooshes away!!!

NO!!!!! it is above him now!!!!!! the beam is shining upon him…. but it wooshes away again. phew. that was very close.

however, a woman is wailing in the trees. SHARON??? is that you??? plane guy is running toward the voice!!!! and it is sharon!!!

plane guy holds sharon as she sobs and begs him not to let them take her again…….. which is a lot of responsibility to place on a random guy, but clearly she has been through a lot.

mulder and scully and frish are trying to get on a plane now. but mulder says what if there IS no second crash site because the second aircraft never fell??

well, i was just getting used to the idea of there being a second crash site, and now it has been taken away from me!!! but i assume he is saying that the UFO must have gotten away fine???

(author's note: no! no, i assumed wrong, for he surmised correctly that it crashed underwater? again, was i supposed to be following that? because i wasn't)

scully does not want to take frish back to DC by herself, and who can blame her? that’s a long drive with a strange man! and surely now mulder is going to run off and engage in some sort of antics!! probably to get himself kidnapped and all that!!!!

aww, but he waves goodbye as their airplane takes off. and then he sets out into the night. 

he drives out to the lake where he thinks maybe the UFO got away, where some guy is telling him there is a hovering light flying over every now and then

scully brings this frish guy back to her HOUSE??? she says she needs to get some stuff before she talks to her agent in charge and i’m thinking no!!! what if he’s lying!?! you brought him into your house!!! what if he gets you?!?

he’s having a crisis of faith on if he’ll get arrested for lying about the plane crash, and i’m sorry to hear he has to live with that guilt, but let’s do this in a place where she doesn't live. 

she says she will do her best to tell his story to someone who can help him. which is very kind of her. but again. let us not bring strangers to our residence.

and he asks to make a phone call to his girlfriend and say he’s safe but i’m thinking noOooOoo why does it have to be on HER phone???? i don’t trust this man at all!!!!!

mulder is sailing out into the lake with this random guy. oh he’s gonna scuba dive. you see, that isn’t something you should do without experience, but here he is. that's the kinda crazy fox mulder brings to the table.

scully takes frish to a restaurant, and who is here but PENDRELL!!! yelling about her birthday. he tries to buy her a drink, and she points out she is with somebody. he laughs and says well let me buy him one too. good for him! 

BUT MUSTACHE MAN IS HERE. he is trying to SHOOT frish. and pendrell is bringing his drinks over and HE GETS SHOT as SCULLY SHOOTS MUSTACHE GUY.

oh my god. is she gonna watch PENDRELL DIE RIGHT THEN AND THERE???

well i thought he was a bit weird, but i didn’t want to see him BLEED OUT!!!

mulder is diving. into god knows what. i’m scared he’ll get the bends or something. or run out of air. or any other horrific scuba related phenomenon. 

but there is something down there!!! something big and metal. i’m scared some sort of evil creature is going to jump out. 

BAH! ALIEN!!!!

okay, he didn’t jump out, but he was unexpected. 

and the light is back!!!! it must be the UFO!!! come to get the alien and maybe the mulder in the process!

end scene.

woaugh…. 

we started with birthday dinner and ended with dead alien and dying pendrell. what a piece of TV.

honestly, the episode was good, don’t get me wrong. but there was so much happening so quickly that i was a little lost. can you blame me? first we had two aircraft and then three and then two crash sites and then one and then two but the other one was underwater. and it was going really fast. 

i firmly believe that in media like this when the world is always about to blow up, you need to take time to make me care about the characters living or dying. you can't replace character development with a ticking time bomb or blow after blow after blow and expect that to be compelling writing. and while i think in the past seasons there has been an excellent balance of character development to character torture or fighting the end of the world, this season has been very heavy handed on the character torture. and i want to make it clear: i am an angst enthusiast. but also, after a certain point, it's like, are we here to just watch these guys suffer? is that what brings us before the TV screen? you don't need an even ratio of character happy time to character sad time- a small amount of character happy time can go a long, long way, so i'm glad we started with some today- perhaps the first all season?

what i'm trying to say is that the opening is going to to get me through a lot of hard times. but still... mulder doesn’t remember birthdays………. this man... i want to shake him like a rag doll and knock some sense into his head.

oh pendrell... how i wonder where your story will go next!

[brightbrightpink]

The way Zara offered Fig an out, an idea about how to leave school without screwing things up for her friends, was so thoughtful but it also has me so concern for entirely selfish reasons.

I Don't Like Change. If the bad kids' lineup changed in the 4th season, that would destroy me. My high school senior year was wrecked by online school and loneliness and uncertainty. I need the bad kids to have their senior year Together or I'll lose my mind. And if there's no Fig, how will we get figayda content, cig figs content, sandra lynn my favorite hot mom, bad girls sisterhood, all of that would be over and I'd Cry.

But also, from a marketing standpoint, I kind of seriously don't think they would let the lineup of their flagship series change in the fourth quarter. It's just, it's not a good business decision. It could alienate fans, it will at least mean that everyone has to learn to love a new character when we already love fig. Plus, they made that really cool merch of Ayda, who is a character in her own right but is so associated to Fig that it would be odd to sell it without her in the show. The same goes for the Gilear plush too, tbh. And all of the "sets" of merch for the bad kids, especially the fancy dice set, would become like, obsolete with a change in lineup. I don't think they would want that.

Idk this post is all over the place but I really hope Emily has changed her mind about wanting Fig to retire and drop out of school. She has all these new powers and all this cool stuff going on, hopefully that makes her more fun for Emily to play.

And if her story seems like it's kind of concluded, that's okay, she still has friends to support. Not all of the bad kids' personal lives have been super relevant to the main plot at all times. If I remembered correctly, Gorgug didn't have a lot tied up in the freshman year plot until he started dating Zelda, but Riz was super involved because of the penny stuff and his dad's stuff. Adaine was super involved in the plot sophomore year because her parents were working for the nightmare king, but this year she's obviously been super helpful and useful to the party, but her main storyline is just trying to make money, it's not tied up into the big bad like fig and kristen are with their goddesses. Fig could have a year like that for senior year, where she just helps out her friends and spends all her free time writing dope songs and starting podcasts with ayda. Maybe she could get an ADHD test. Honestly, kristen could use a similar year, where she's trying to connect with her brothers but not because her Goddess is unmade, just because she cares about them. The really plot-driven stuff could maybe be more gorgug or fabian heavy, and maybe adaine's mom could come back. Idk. I just don't want fig to have to give up her adventuring party just because she found self actualization with a lesbian goddess of the dawn.

[plantinghobbies]

Growing Pains

One: On the Day That I Met You

Long time reader, first time poster. This is my first time writing, well almost anything, especially a chaptered fic. The biggest thanks to @solipsisticno1 for being the best beta this newbie could ask for. Would love to hear what you think, thanks for reading!

He clocks her when he first walks in, partially because she’s sat reading a book - in a bar, who does that - but mainly because of what she’s eating – a caprese salad. The menu here has basically been sustaining him since he flew in, which is how he is certain that what she’s eating is not on it. Up until now, the proximity to the studio has largely made up for the lackluster food options. But the sight of fresh produce in this mecca of fried food has him gravitating toward the open stool next to her like a water-starved man to a desert mirage.

While Matty had initially given Jack shit for relocating to a place he’d never heard of – one that seemed diametrically opposed to the big cities that had soundtracked and marked their friendship up until now - he was starting to see Asheville’s appeal. It definitely didn’t have the physical anonymity that London or New York had, that feeling that you could live there your whole life and never even come close to seeing all it had to offer. On the other hand, Matty is pretty sure that he’s covered every inch of this town, walking to clear his head in between writing sessions and dicking around in the studio. He can navigate from his rental to the studio downtown already without Google Maps. Where this kind of familiarity used to bore him, he now finds comfort in it instead. It might be the only thing around him these days that feels impervious to change.

He settles on the bar stool and glances around, still not quite used to the visual onslaught that greets him, even after three weeks. The walls of the otherwise brightly lit bar are absolutely littered from floor to ceiling with signs. And not the street and beer signs that he’s come to associate with American pubs. Instead, aggressively inspirational sayings and pseudo-biblical quotes scream at him from every direction in a variety of sizes and fonts. He can’t tell if it’s ironic or not. He hasn’t wanted to ask for fear of offending someone, an instinct he pats himself on the back for as a sign of significant maturity.

After the bartender leaves with his order, he glances over at her and her mystery salad, drumming his hands on the table as he takes her in. Short, dark hair frames her face and she brings her hand up to bite at her nail, a habit that he can tell from her hand she does often. She looks to be slightly younger than him and for a second, Matty wonders if she’s a fan. That may just be a tiny bit of wishful thinking on his part – he hasn’t been recognized once since he got here and if he’d never admit it but it’s starting to grate on him. He tries to tell himself it’s because he loves the connection he has with his fans, has missed it during their hiatus. But if he’s honest, it’s picking at a worry that he has in the back of his mind, that it’s the first indication of a slide into irrelevance that he’s been bracing himself for since he first heard a crowd roaring for him and his band. And each day that goes by without an impassioned interaction on the sidewalk or request for a selfie in the grocery store, the worry grows bigger.

When her gaze shifts from her book to the clock on the wall, he realizes he’s been staring and averts his eyes quickly in a way that he hopes is not obvious. He briefly considers getting his food to go, shuffling back to the studio or his house to find something to distract from his current thoughts. But he forces “for here” out when he orders his food, knowing that all that awaits him at home is Internet rabbit holes and more wanking than is probably healthy.  

He’s starting to envy the book and her foresight to bring it as the noise around him is overtaken by the noise in his head. He’s trying to get better at being alone with his own thoughts, which is fucking hard when your mind resembles the inside of a tornado, disconnected thoughts spiraling around each other like debris, forever circling the calm of the eye but never reaching it. Jesus, he’s so sick of his own thoughts at this point. He makes it a heroic - by his standards - amount of time before the thoughts in his mind force their way out of his mouth.

“Bloody hell, what is with these signs?!” He mutters.  

Tess hadn’t really been paying attention to the guy next to her, appearing intentionally focused on the thriller she was reading to ward off conversation from anyone she might know. It’d been a tough day at work and she needed time to decompress before her chit-chatty brother realized she was there. When she hears his comment though, she can’t help the snort that escapes her. Real ladylike Tess. Turning to her right, she can tell from the way he sits up straighter as their gaze's meet that he relishes getting a reaction, even if it’s from a complete stranger.

“You know, my brother owns this place and he might not take kindly to that question” she says, expecting embarrassment from him but getting only a smirk back.

“Aaah well that explains your access to off-menu items” he says, nodding to her salad. “I’ve been coming here for weeks and wasn’t sure if they even had a vegetable in the place.”  

“Exclusive for VIPs only.”

“Good to know, had a hunch you were special” he says with a wink, enjoying the slight tinge of pink it brings to her cheeks. “Anyway, I’ve been dying to ask someone about these” he gestures up at the wall “for ages but didn’t want to put my foot in it. Which I obviously just did anyway.” Brown eyes stare back at her, wide-eyed with curiosity and childlike impatience that would be unattractive on another man his age - she’s guessing mid-thirties, maybe forty - but on him seems almost endearing.  

When she doesn’t respond, he prods her. “Well? What’s the story? Is it a gag? I know you Americans love to live, laugh, love and all that but even you have to admit this is a bit much.”  

The words are tumbling out of her mouth before she has a chance to consider the ramifications of prolonging the conversation, which she had been actively avoiding in the first place. “Wait, nobody’s told you?”

He shakes his head slowly, warily. She’s got him, can’t help herself.   “Oook, well..” she hesitates, glancing down at her own food “you know what, another time, don’t want to ruin your dinner.”

“No, no go ahead, it hasn’t even arrived yet” large hands hovering over the empty place setting in front of him.

Looking over her shoulder and leaning into him for dramatic effect, she whispers “Well, it’s not something we like to talk about, been one too many true crime junkies coming through asking questions,” she pauses, eyes trailing over his upper body “but you don’t seem like the type. You seem trustworthy.” He looks thrilled with this absolutely unfounded vote of confidence in his character.

“So, the previous owner, Marge, she was this real battle ax. Didn’t take shit from anyone. Her husband – I forget his name - had run out years before with the next-door neighbor, leaving her alone with their daughter and this bar. When he left, people said he took the last shred of love that she had left. Except when it came to her little girl. You know that saying they use on the news when someone dies tragically, that they ‘lit up a room’? Well, that was Lauren. She was a sweetheart, her and my brother actually dated for years. Until…” the shudder is a little over the top but Tess has always fashioned herself a great story teller.  

Her silence is punctuated only by the slight skid of wood across the floor, his body unconsciously leaning forward and taking the bar stool under him with it as he almost whispers “Until what?”

“Until she was murdered…here” Glancing away, she hears him take in a stilted breath.

“Here? Here as in Asheville?” He blurts out, voice thick with shock.  

“Here as in at this bar” Her knuckles rap agains the wood with every word and he jumps back as if it’s on fire.

“Anyway, Lauren – the daughter - she loved these things” Tess gestures to the walls around them “so every year on the anniversary of her death, Marge bought a new one and put it on the wall. When she died last year and my brother bought the place, it felt wrong to take it down. Like removing a shrine or a cemetery or something, you know?”

He nods slowly, still stuck on what she had said before. “Holy shit, that’s mad!” His eyes gravitate toward the worn wood even as the rest of his body instinctually leans away from it - as if the misfortune that occurred on it was contagious.

“Did they ever catch who did it?” he’s aware of how breathy his voice sounds, that he’s just being nosy now.

“No, but the police think whoever it is was likely a regular. Maybe still is, honestly” her eyes flit around them, sizing up the bodies as if they’ll give themselves away.  

“Jesus, really?!”  

Tess’s gaze comes back to him, assessing him more closely than she had before. She couldn’t ignore his conventional good looks, with a lithe frame that hinted at toned muscles just below and a riotous mop of untamed dark curls on his head. The words cute and sexy float to the front of her mind. Six packs and success didn’t do much for Tess, though she wouldn’t hold it against a guy. But funny, nerdy, personable? Those were like kryptonite for her, a combination that made her weak in ways that were concerning to feminism. And this guy seemed to have them in spades, she thought. Add in the accent and woof… She shook her head subtly to refocus, remembering she had left him in suspense.

For his part, her story is the most interesting thing he’s heard in a while. He’s already thinking about how to mine this for lyrics, the tragic story hidden in the walls of this charming dive bar. They’re staring at each other, and he watches with confusion as a slow, mischievous smirk replaces the grim look on her face.

“No, not really ” there’s a hint of a laugh in her voice “but that would be way cooler than the actual story.” After a quick sip of her Diet Coke, she launches into the truth about the signs, which are her sister-in-law’s doing. Well, sort of. When Sadie and Ben moved into their first house, Sadie’s mother started giving them to her for near every holiday. There was no way they were going in their home, but they didn’t want to offend Becky either. At first, they buried them in the bathroom and the garage but quickly ran out of wall space. Fed up, Sadie threw them in a box and shipped them off to the bar. It’s become a running joke among the regulars to see who can add the “best” one to the collection.

“So that whole story about Marge and Lauren and the murder, that’s all made up?” The pink in her cheeks accentuates her already enticing features as she nods. “Wow, that’s like, proper fucked up - and that’s saying something coming from me” His harsh words are softened by the hint of playfulness in his voice. She clearly enjoyed taking the piss out of him, he kinda digs it. “Is that what you all do for fun in small towns? Just lie around and think up grim tall tales to sell to handsome strangers?”  

“Small town?! Come on new guy! Asheville is a city thank you very much” Tess is indignant - she’s not this town’s biggest fan but she’s from here, she’s earned the right to make fun of it. Asheville is like her fourth sibling – she mocks it mercilessly, but if someone else talks shit about it, the gloves are off.

“Please. London, where I live, is a city. Manchester, where I’m from, has 500,000 people in it. That’s a city. This….” He shrugs and trails off, gesturing around him as if it was obvious.  

Exasperation is evident on her face. It’s adorable, he thinks, surprising himself with the thought.  

“You clearly just haven’t availed yourself of all this city” she emphasizes the word “has to offer.”

“Is that an invitation to show me around?” The comment is punctuated by a flit of his eyes across her frame that she should find skeezy but is somehow hot. Tess’s friends often remind her that her flirtation index is not the best on a good day – girl, you wouldn’t register a guy was flirting with you if he tattooed it on his naked chest, Fern often said - and especially not when it’s been this long. Well, fuck you Fern, even I picked up on this.

But just because she knows it’s happening doesn’t mean she knows how to respond to it. His comment jolts through her, sparking excitement and then almost immediate anxiety as she struggles with what to do next. Playing it cool isn’t Tess’s list of strengths – understatement of the century, she thinks - and she’s painfully aware of the time passing by where she’s failed to cobble together even a simple response. Matty senses the shift in her mood, goes to change the subject but gets interrupted by his food being delivered.

In the end, faced with flirt or flee, Tess choose’s flee. She takes advantage of the momentary distraction his dinner provides to extricate herself, gathering her book and sliding off the stool. The abruptness of her departure doesn’t sit right with him, it’s not a reaction he’s used to these days – and yes, he’s aware of how much of an absolute wanker that makes him sound like. He doesn’t think it’s something he said but he can’t seem to be too careful these days. With a polish he typically reserves for his professional persona, he tests the waters with a final comment.

“Nice talking to you,” he says to her back as she puts on her jacket.

“Yea, you too, have a good night,” she throws over her shoulder without even a glance back. Ok, based on that he’s at least 75% sure she’s not rushing off to shit talk him on Instagram for daring to wink at her without her consent. He thought she’d been into their conversation? He misses the days when his knee jerk response to interactions wasn’t to play out how it could be perceived online. Plus, she wouldn’t have wished him a good night if she was pissed off, right?

This last thought gives him some comfort, but he’s still left with a feeling he can’t put his finger on. It follows him home and fucks with his sleep. George would tell him he was obsessing, take the piss with the rest of the guys – but they weren’t here. And that was the problem, wasn’t it. It’s then - as he’s staring at the shadows the moon casts on the ceiling of his expansive bedroom – that he’s able to put a label to the dull itch that’s plagued him since he watched her leave. Loneliness. He hadn’t been alone this long for at least twenty years, since the start of the band. And Jack helped, but their time together was spent mining his feelings – pain, happiness, uncertainty, self-loathing – for lyrics, which was his passion but also really fucking draining. His conversation with her – god, he was such a simp, he didn’t even know her name – had felt fun, carefree, familiar. Easy. He hadn’t had that since he arrived here, probably since he hugged the boys goodbye backstage after the final show. And, unsurprisingly – addict, after all – he craved the feeling again.

[2024-grimoire-challenge]

Midsummer/ Litha

This one is a litte late, as Tumblr decided to eat a couple of my drafts. But its here! The Litha/ Midsummer prompt! We'll start with some informative posts here on tumblr and elsewhere on the internet about the holiday!

Litha On Tumblr

Celebrate Litha

Ideas for Litha

Litha

Litha masterpost

Litha on the Internet

Wikipedia

Celtic Connection

Learn Religions

History

The Prompt

Okay! Make a new page, solely for Midsummer!

Write out a description of the holiday. What is it? When is it? How is it traditionally celebrated? Why were things celebrated the way they were? What are the things that this holiday represents and stands for? This is the meat and potatoes of the holiday. Any and all bits of info aside from this are just the seasoning. Mine is a few small paragraphs about the holiday itself.

Now make some lists. What are the colors used to decorate for this holiday? What are some incense/ oils/ candle scents that are commonly associated with this day? Gemstones? Herbs? Is there a moon phase or particular god/goddess associated with this holiday? What about animals? Flowers? Were there any traditional offerings left out on this holiday? And what foods were made on this day?

What are some of the activities you can do to celebrate this holiday? And what about magic and rituals. Are there any specific kinds of magic to perform on or around this day? Are there any poems or blessings associated with this holiday?

That’s a lot of info, I know. But now for the second part of the holiday prompt!

Make it your own!

Now, given all the information you’ve gathered, make your own small ritual to be performed on Midsummer. To do this, I suggest a scrap paper to brainstorm on. Here’s some things to keep in mind and help write out your ritual.

What is the theme/ purpose of the ritual? (Healing ritual? Cleansing? Renewal of intentions? Welcoming the light?)

What are the tools you’ll use and what is the purpose/ association it has? (candles, athame/ sacred blade, incense, gemstones etc)

What power(s) are you calling upon for the ritual and why? (elements, deities, sun/ moon, personal power, etc)

How do you set it up? Is there specific placement of the tools? Direction to face when calling the above powers? Do you cast a circle? Or do you simply light a candle and bow your head in a moment of silent prayer/ meditation?

Good luck and Happy crafting witches!

-Mod Hazel