#but then I realized the 2 cans of tomato I had in the cupboard were probably not enough

[vinceaddams]

a fun thing you can do when you're a grownup is buy a bunch of ingredients and make 6 litres of spaghetti sauce in a big pot and divide it up into a bunch of containers and put it in the freezer!

[vynegar]

luke 2nd anniversary SSR, part three

no matter what, I will always be drawn to you.

same disclaimer and notes from part one.

youtube link to Axr’s video of the card story

links to other parts: one two

more tot translations here

do not repost

[PART THREE]

[31:34]

???: Hey! What are you two still doing here?

A shout came from nearby, and Luke and I turned toward the man jogging toward us. It was the manager of the cemetery.

Manager: It's already closing time.

MC: (Closing time?)

I lowered my head and checked the time; it was indeed almost evening. At some point the rain had stopped, so I lowered the suit jacket and shook out my sore hands. The sunlight was no longer dazzling, instead illuminating us gently.

Luke: Alright, we'll leave now.

MC: (I can't believe it's closing at such a critical moment... What bad luck.) Luke...

Luke: Let's go home for now. We really can't stay any longer.

Luke took my hand, and we faced the tombstone once again. The stone base was wet, the scent of trees and earth was in the post-rain air, and it was comforting somehow.

Luke: Mom, Dad, we're heading back for now. We'll come visit again next time.

MC: Yeah, don't worry. Everything will get better.

--

[32:30] Streets outside the neighborhood

We were just in time for rush hour when we left the cemetery, so Luke and I ended up deciding to walk home. Because our conversation earlier was cut short, we both had a lot on our minds and were silent on the way back. It was dusk already, the sunset staining the horizon with layers upon layers of gold and orange. A bird streaked by and I subconsciously followed its shadow, gazing towards the horizon.

MC: (Wait, that's...) Luke, look, it's a double rainbow!

I instinctively tugged at the hem of Luke's jacket. In the splendid sky, a double rainbow arched across the greater part of the city, warm and magnificent.

Luke: Have the skies cleared up?

MC: Yeah, the skies are clear now. (1) Luke, do you still remember the double rainbow we saw last time we were on Nosta Island? (2)

Once, on that isolated island with "buried" gold, Luke and I had seen a unique miracle together.

MC: Do you still remember what you said back then?

Luke: "In the future, can we go to more places, searching for more miracles?" (3)

As if he had thought of something, Luke's expression gradually changed from the somewhat subdued look it had had until now. I took the opportunity and made him face me.

MC: Luke, I know it's pointless to say anything more, but I want to tell you that... whether it was back then or right now, my answer is always the same: yes. But one thing is different: back then we were just childhood friends, but in the future... I want to be at your side as someone even closer to you. No matter how things end up... I’ll still accept it, gladly.

Luke: !!!

Luke looked at me, his expression changing. Then, he suddenly took my hand and began to run.

 [33:57 Home]

Luke led me back home at the fastest speed possible. He hung his suit jacket on the back of a chair and let me change clothes, then entered the bedroom. In that time, he didn't offer a word of explanation.

MC: (Is Luke... okay? Was what I said just now... a bit inappropriate, like I was forcing him?)

I thought for a moment, then saw it was already dusk and decided to make something for dinner. After Luke had relaxed a little, I could talk to him about it.

MC: Is there any food at home?

I opened up the fridge. Besides frozen food, the only fresh ingredients were tomatoes and eggs.

MC: (I forgot, with Luke's culinary ability... how could there be ingredients in the house.)

I searched through the kitchen cupboards and was able to find a jar of orange jam. I opened the lid and smelled it; it seemed fine.

MC: (I remember there was toast in the cupboard downstairs, maybe we can first get something in our stomachs before we order takeout.)

Having made up my mind, I closed the cupboard. When I turned around, however, I realized that Luke had already been standing behind me. He held in his hands the ring box that I found earlier, his face blushing faintly.

MC: Luke, how did you...

Luke: MC, I have something to tell you.

He lifted his head and held the box forward.

Luke: I think Aaron's already told you, that I made this box for you. At the same time, I also made a ring.

MC: Luke...

Luke: But I don't think he knows how... conflicted I felt, the entire time when I was making them. I knew in my mind that it was wrong to make it, that I couldn't ask for more... but I just couldn't control myself. And I couldn't help but imagine what you would look like wearing it.

MC: ...

I couldn't help but want to reach out and touch Luke, but he shook his head and gazed at me. His expression gradually relaxed. The faint light of dusk slanted in through the window, falling onto his eyes.

Luke: Back then, I thought a lot. I thought about our reuniting, about our present, about those past eight years. And then, I thought about our childhood. Ever since I was a kid, I was always that "obedient child". I always felt that instead of my own feelings and needs... it was more important to protect your parents, to protect you. I had to be brave in order to not make people worry, in order to protect you. For so many years, that was what I thought. Maybe it’s made me unhappy in the past, but life goes on… Slowly, I got used to comforting myself that way.

MC: ...

The next moment, though, Luke's tone changed again.

Luke: But now, I'm becoming more and more unable to fool myself. MC, what do I do?

MC: Luke, you don't need to fool yourself.

Luke: That's right.

He suddenly laughed.

Luke: On the way home, I thought a lot. I can't deny it, you've... swayed me yet again. When it comes to you, it doesn't matter if I hide it or hesitate, it'll all just disappear in the end. Those eight years apart already proved that distance and time won't pull us apart. And my hesitations and avoidance made me realize that, no matter what, I will always be drawn to you.

MC: Luke, you...

Luke: MC, I don't fear fate. But I underestimated your determination, and my own greed. Will tomorrow be my last day? I don't know, but at least today, I want to make a decision just for myself –

Luke got down on one knee in front of me, raising the ring box. He pressed on the small bird, and the box slowly opened to reveal a ring. The sunset cast a golden glow on the perfectly-cut diamond, which sparkled in front of me.

MC: Luke...

I looked in shock at everything before me, my hands unconsciously gripping my skirt. After what felt like both an eternity and an instant, that uncertain heart was finally set in place, then slowly filled with joy.

Luke: MC, you are my key that can always, unfailingly, open up my heart. I don't know if this is the right decision, and I don't know if I'll regret this in the future. But just like Dévouement, the word I inscribed on the ring without a second thought: I'm willing to devote both my past and future to you; to carve your name onto both my heart and soul. And it's only now that I've decided to face it openly. Not for anyone else, just for myself. I want to put this ring on your finger, I want to walk alongside you and make the most of our time, 'til death do us apart. So, MC, will you...

Luke paused, then earnestly began again:

Luke: MC, please, once more, let me officially become your family.

There was a warmth on my cheeks, and I furiously wiped away the tears. Don't cry, you can't cry – that's what I told myself. Because I wanted to smile in this moment, I wanted Luke to know that I was happy. I reached my hand out towards him.

MC: Yes. Luke, let's continue on together.

Luke took out the ring and carefully placed it on my finger, as preciously as if he were making a vow. The great stone in my heart fell with a crash, and with immense relief I leaned into his embrace, standing on tiptoe to softly kiss him. It was as if I could share all my feelings and love with him this way.

Luke: ...

Luke froze but quickly took the initiative. My hand that was holding him slowly slid down as we kissed, until I could barely support myself against the counter. Luke wasn't very clingy. After the kiss, he slightly backed away from me. He stroked his finger on my lip, and subconsciously began to frown again.

MC: Stop frowning...

I wanted to smooth out that frown on his forehead, but he gently caught my hand. There was a different kind of light in his eyes – like restraint, but also desire.

Luke: If we keep going...

MC: Then what’ll happen?

Luke ignored my teasing. I knew that even now, Luke was still hesitating. I wanted him to think more for himself, but Luke had been burdened by the shackles of "others" for over twenty years. This wasn't something that could be changed with just one heart-to-heart, but that was alright. No matter how long it took, I would be there for Luke the entire time. Bring Luke happiness, starting from right now –

MC: (Still frowning. Guess I'll have to sort you out.)

I sneakily dipped my finger into the jam, and while Luke wasn't paying attention, I smeared it onto his nose.

Luke: ...

MC: Luke, today’s our engagement day. What kind of a fiancée looks so sad on a day like that? Therefore, I’ll have to punish you.

As I spoke, I smeared a bit of orange jam on Luke’s face.

MC: This is punishment for frowning in the car. And this is punishment for frowning in the cemetery. And this is punishment for… ah!

Luke suddenly leaned in close and rubbed against my nose. Of course, then my nose also got stained with sticky jam.

MC: That’s cheating!

Luke: Is it? But you never explained the rules.

MC: Wait…

Without waiting for me to defend myself, Luke’s face had already nuzzled into me. I wasn’t going to be outdone: cheeks, nose, chin, collarbone… I made sure every bit of exposed skin on Luke got smeared with jam. We turned each other’s bodies into a battlefield. Right now our thoughts were occupied with strategizing and conquering territory, with no room for anything else. Gradually, jam covered every inch of exposed skin, and the faint sweet scent of oranges wafted through the air. As we messed around, Luke had trapped me in front of the kitchen counter, pressed up close against him.

MC: That’s enough… we’re completely covered in jam…

[41:40]

Luke: It’s just jam… I’ll “clean it up.”

MC: Ah… wait!

Before I could react, Luke had already lifted me onto the narrow kitchen counter. If I leaned back, Luke would press forward, and there was no escape for me. He moved toward my throat, and his warm, uneven breath tickled as it fell on the hollows of my neck. I turned my head slightly, my body subconsciously leaning back once more.

MC: Luke…

Probably because we were immersed in the orange-scented atmosphere, my voice had turned sweet as well.

Luke: If you’re always moving around, how am I supposed to clean you up?

Luke’s arm encircled my waist. His palm slowly moved upward, and every inch of skin that he touched, burned. Wind rushed into the room, chilling my exposed skin, and I shivered lightly. The next instant, Luke licked the jam on my neck.

MC: !!!

As if I had been shocked, I tried to retreat, but the hand at my waist was blocking my path.

Luke: So sweet…

MC: The jam?

Luke: The jam… and also…

His warm tongue followed the tracks of jam, leaving a soft feeling on my neck. The experimental licks turned into kisses and I gradually grew weaker, almost losing my grip on the jar of jam. An unfamiliar elation enveloped me, the bliss and expectation spreading throughout my veins and bones. My awareness gradually blurred, until the only thing I felt was Luke’s scalding lips. My heart pounded like I had been flung high in the air, and was rapidly plummeting down. My body felt out of control as well, the weightlessness extending from my heart to my limbs.

MC: W-wait…

Luke backed off from me.

Luke: What is it? Are you uncomfortable?

MC: …It’s not that.

It was hard to say no while we were intertwined. All I could do was stare motionlessly at Luke. The corners of his eyes glistened with moisture, tugging at my heartstrings. In a flash, the clamor of emotions found an outlet and poured out.

MC: It’s not that it’s uncomfortable, it’s… it’s not enough… Hugs and kisses aren’t enough to fill the distance between us. But we’re already so close…

Right after I spoke, I felt Luke’s hands tighten slightly, bringing me closer to him. His eyes, still with that watery gleam, were staring at me. I couldn’t withstand that kind of gaze from Luke and tried to avert my gaze, but couldn’t bear that either, entangling with him…

Luke: Then let’s get closer… even closer. Whether it’s jam, or your feelings all in a mess… I’ll take responsibility for “cleaning it up”. All you need to do is look at me, and leave everything to me…

The close kisses once more descended on my clavicle up to my throat. Luke curled his tongue, swallowing the remaining jam bit by bit. After a few tries, these kisses gradually intensified, becoming hotter, longer. I couldn’t help but lean my head back and pant, like a fish outside of water. Amidst close contact and kisses, we succumbed to each other.

I couldn’t hold onto the jam any longer and allowed the glass jar to fall from my hands. In the moment, even the sound of shattering glass was alluring. Shadows swayed in the light, the evening sun slowly dimmed, and the night that belonged to us was just beginning.

[END]

(1) This phrase can be used as an idiom meaning a period of hope or peace after a turbulent time.

(2) Events from his Iridescent Heartbeat SSR.

(3) In Iridescent Heartbeat, this line is translated as "In the future, can we go to more places, searching for more adventures?" I edited it slightly for accuracy and to fit better here.

Sidenote: If you want to go back and read my analysis of Luke’s mother’s favorite poem in the context of this card, here’s the link to the post.

[meher-sumedha]

Okay so I have a few

1. Drunk az mistakenly confesses his feeling for Gwyn in front of everyone.

2. Gwyn and az making bracelets together.

3. Gwynriel’s first official date.

4. Az and Gwyn on a spy mission together.

Okay so I'll write the first one first cause I really really like it and really want to write it. Also, this is my first time writing like smut, smut so. FORGIVE ME. As you know - 2 am. my mental health is fucked. Anyways ENJOY!

Gwynriel Headcanon : Gwyn's Little Crush

(I know just trust me on this)

Gwyn and Azriel had been dating since a year now. And last month only the mating bond had snapped for Azriel. It had made Gwyn's life shit.

As much as she wanted to be with him, the mating bond had made their lives shit. Like really shitty. They couldn't leave their room without Azriel killing someone.

After one week Azriel had convinced Gwyn that he was okay and was gonna behave. He did not. They had gone to a restaurant in Velaris, as a dinner date.

He almost killed the waiter because he looked at Gwyn when he gave her her dish. On their way back home he kept telling Gwyn he was okay.

"I swear to god Gwyn, I'm fine."

"Az you almost killed the waiter"

.... "Well I controlled myself in front of the receptionist"

"YOU ALMOST TOOK OUT HIS EYES!"

"HE WAS FLIRTING WITH YOU"

"HE ASKED ME IF I WAS FINE!"

"WELL, I, I"

"WEL!????"

Azriel was silent after that, he knew Gwyn was right but wasn't able to spend any time with her. He was like a freakin dog. That couldn't behave.

When they kept walking and Azriel didn't respond, Gwyn stopped in the middle of the road and came in front of Azriel. She took his face in her hands, and pulled it so close that their foreheads were touching.

His hands instinctively wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer. "I'm sorry" Whispered Azriel, his shadows thickening around them.

"Az, I love you with all my heart" And then let out a small chuckle, "but we can't risk you going and killing people". This made Azriel smile, everything she did made him smile.

Azriel then said, "I think we should wait before I get out of my room again" And chuckled. So did Gwyn.

"I agree" She said and smiled. But then Azriel pulled his head away and pulled Gwyn closer to him, so she was now looking up to him. He frowned and said, "But then how-how would we spend time together without anyone knowing?"

Gwyn rested her head against his chest. Trying to listen to his heartbeat to calm her own. Trying to figure out a solution. And then it hit her.

"Well, uhmm, I-I could move in with you if-if you like cause you know we've already done the deed and, and I already sleep in your room like three nights of the week and I-" Babbling. Azriel realized Gwyn was babbling.

So, he stopped her before she could panic more, "I'd love that" He said. And Gwyn stopped. Smiling against his chest.

"How does it feel" She asked. "How does what feel?", she then looked up to him and said with a cheeky voice, "How does it feel to be in the presence of your mate". Azriel pulled her even closer, and told her, "It feels like, like, I-I don't know how to explain it".

Gwyn chuckled and said, "Well you never were to one for words" And stood on her tippy toes and kissed him on the nose. A small, simple gesture that still made Azriel's heart leap. But then Azriel looked at her with such intensity that Gwyn couldn't help but stand normally, grab the collar of his shirt and smash her lips onto his.

Azriel chuckled into the kiss and winnowed them, to his apartment. His apartment, their apartment.

When they arrived, Gwyn broke the kiss and asked, "Where are we?" And started to look around the room. The simple room with a black cupboard and a black desk. With a brown bread.

And when she started to walk away, Azriel pulled her back into his embrace and just stared at her. Imprinting her beauty to his mind, not that he could ever compare it with the real deal.

When he did stuff like that, he could see that Gwyn became as red as a tomato. But usually it ended with cuddles in bed. Right now, Gwyn grabbed his collar and smashed her lips onto his, she then slipped her hands under his waist band.

Azriel then let out a thirst groan. In one smooth movement Gwyn slipped her hands out and took off his shirt, breaking their kiss for a millisecond. And then smashing her lips again. This time, she slammed Azriel into the wall with that powerful of a kiss.

Hunger, desire, all was shining through the bond for Azriel. He had sensed her scent change the moment they arrived. All was left of the scent of flowers and lillies, was arousal and arousal only. But Azriel couldn't loose his self control. Cause he knew if he did, he could hurt her.

So as much control as he could muster, he picked Gwyn up, his hands under her hips and took her to the bed and laid her down with utter gentleness. He FUCKING tried, tried to control himself but she just wasn't fucking giving up.

So Azriel thought, fuck it, she wants it rough, fine. I can give her rough. When Azriel's hand slipped under her leggings, Gwyn smirked into the kiss. She knew, she knew Azriel would loose his control and she knew what she did to him. Yet she didn't stop, still testing his limits.

Before today, Azriel had made love to her, but-but today, he was gonna fuck her. He was gonna ride her until she couldn't stop screaming his name.

So he did, all night. All night they tested each other. All night seeing who would break first. It was mostly Azriel. And that night, Azriel discovered, that if he wanted her undone, he was gonna have to do a lot more than just thrust into her with his long length. Gods, he loved it. Loved the rush, the pleasure. So he did, he took it as a challenge, and as Azriel didn't like loosing, he soon got a hold of her tell. Of what got her undone.

But, he only used it in extreme times, when she wouldn't break. For he would never want her to know his strategy.

Even though it was a game, it wasn't at the same time. As much as Azriel loved the sex, he loved the little cuddles, the silent training, the talks they had after one had a nightmare, the simple walks alongside the sidra, the flying with Gwyn screaming in his ear, the sleepovers, the getting drunk. He loved her, and every single fucking thing about her. He loved it.

And today, after a month of isolation, Azriel was finally gonna meet his brothers. He hoped that he had some control over himself, and that he doesn't fuck this up and ends up killing everyone.

They were at the house of wind, where Nesta and Cassian were hosting the dinner. They had just had dinner and a few drinks and were sitting on sofas. Gwyn was playing with Nyx on the floor as she was the only one who was not drunk.

"Gwyn" Said Cassian. "Mhmm", "Gwyn", "Mhmm", "GWYN", "WHAT". This had become their new routine, Rhysand pesturing Gwyn and Gwyn being annoyed. As much as Gwyn pretended she hated it, she actually loved it.

Gwyn then looked back to her high lord, who had Feyre resting her head on his shoulders. "I heard you have a crush" And as soon as he said that, Azriel's eyes shot up from beside Gwyn. Gwyn then put her hand on Azriel's thigh, he was sitting cross legged with Gwyn, which made him calm down.

"You told him?" Gwyn asked Nesta, angered slightly laced in her voice. Nesta shot her hands up in surrender position, "I swear to god I didn't" But then her gaze fell away from Gwyn. And when Gwyn followed that Gaze, she saw her eyes were on a smirking Cassian.

Gwyn took the pillow that was with her and threw it at Cassian's face, which made all of them chuckle. It erased the smirk he had on his face, but not for long. "Fork you" Gwyn muttered and Azriel raised his eyebrows. "A kid's here, I'm not gonna be the one to teach him bad language, you all already do enough of that" And it brought out a laugh in all of them which even made Gwyn smile a bit. . (Nesta, Cassian, Feyre, Rhysand, Azriel (emorie is currently, well somewhere and elucien is on a honeymoon in the day court)).

"Anyways" Said rhysand and he continued, "we thought it might have been a good idea to invite him". Azriel was getting impatient, so he asked, "Who the hell is he?".

And then suddenly, fucking suddenly, Stefan Salvatore walked into that room.

Everyone knew him. I mean who didn't? He was a legend. The only one of his kind. Stories were written about him, the only fae, who was also a vampire.

"Hello love" He said and Gwyn's cheeks reddened. He was hot, hot hot. And suddenly Gwyn's little fangirl was awakened. She wanted to ask him so many questions, did he really drink blood? Did he drink people's blood?

"Hi," Gwyn said and he came closer to her, gods, he was so tall, probably an inch taller than Azriel.

"“You don't know what it's like being in love with you. You know, when you and I were together, every single atom in my body told me that it was the right thing, that we were a perfect fit. And that kind of love, it can change your whole life.”

Gwyn was speechlees. She clumsily stood up and she could've sworn she heard Nesta chuckle. These lines, these lines were Gwyn's favorite when she was a teen. In her room in sangravah, she had these lines written on her walls, so many of them.

For a moment, Gwyn had forgotten Azriel was there, and that was her first mistake. It didn't take Azriel even two seconds to get up and take stefan flying out of the balcony. "Shit shit shit shit shit!" Gwyn muttered to herself.

"What's wrong Gwynnie?" Cassian asked cheekily. "Yeah, is something wrong Gwynnie?" Rhysand joined. "FUCKING DO SOMETHING! HE'S GONNA KILL HIM". "Oh why o why would Azriel do that" Nesta asked.

"NES! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE", And Nesta chuckled. Azriel then flew in while slamming stefan to the ground, stefan was trying to fight but he was failing. Gwyn was smart enough not to go in between them.

After 15 mins of thrashing stefan, Azriel stopped, and said, "You fucking even look at my mate like that, I will fucking kill you, and I swear on my life, that it will not be an easy death."

He then got up and walked towards Gwyn, all of them were trying to contain their laughter but even they were speechless, of course they were, they knew about them but they didn't know that they were mates. Gwyn was well speechless.

She was just gonna start his rant about how he shouldn't have done those things but then Azriel took her hand and said, "I'm sorry" And then Gwyn didn't know what to do. She had prepared a whole speech on how he shouldn't do such shit and now, now she was speechless.

Rhysand then broke the silence, "So... Mates huh?" .

[atinydise]

Ateez reacting to their s/o acting sexy, but being cute or unnatural instead

❦ Genre: Fluff, a little bit suggestive.

❦ Pairing: OT8.

❦ Word count: 3K4.

❦ Requested: Yes, thank you! 🦋

HONGJOONG

Your boyfriend went to the supermarket to find some snacks. He was producing since 7AM without a break. When you joined him, you practically begged him for to rest a bit. So now, you were alone in his big studio, wondering if you had been enough clear about the food you wanted. Bored and hungry, you looked around, trying to find at least a chewing-gum to stop your belly from growling crazily. When finally, a red paper sheet, caught your attention. It was not your type to read Hongjoong's stuff, but this one was titillating your curiosity.

When you made sure that you were completely alone, no camera around, you grabbed the paper. The moment, you realized the explicit lyrics on it, you couldn't help but to compare your shy actions with your boyfriend. Does he want you to act like this? But the real question was: could you do it?

When you heard footstep in the hallway, you put back down everything, and ran on the red couch. "I'm back babe." Said Hongjoong, smiling at you, not suspecting you at all. For you, it was a sign. The right moment to act. He would never expect this from you.

"Oh already! I missed you." You replied, biting your lip messily. Hongjoong raised a brow, not understanding what was going on in your head. "I left 10 minutes ago. Only." You stood up, trying to roll your hips as much as you could. "That's already too much." "Are you okay sweetheart? You look... different?" He asked when you back hugged him, pushing your chest right on his back. You roamed your hands on his abs to his belt. "I-I'm trying to make you feel good." The way your voice cracked and how your hands were tickling more than it should, Hongjoong turned around, trying to not laugh. "Y/N. Stop." He held your wrists. "I don't know why you are trying to do but it doesn't feel right." "I saw the lyrics on the red paper sheet." You said, without thinking twice about the consequences. "Oh." He paused. "Oh." He realized when he finally understood the situation. "Do you want me to be sexier with you?" "Babe that's just lyrics. Inspired by movies, music and you of course." He tried to reassure you. "Don't act sexily like this. Don't change anything, you are perfect. And you were cuter than hotter honestly." You could have been offended, but it felt like a compliment. "Okay." You pouted. "Let's eat before I end by being the meal." He teased you. You slapped his shoulder completely flustered. "Stop!" "I'm joking!" He laughed. "And you are sexy the most when you don't try to be." "Can we change the subject?" You rolled your eyes, looking for your meal. "I can't believe you tried to be sexier because of these lyrics." He busted in laughs, once again.

SEONGHWA

You've been a bit confused the last week. Seonghwa invited his friend one night. To not bother them, you stayed in the bedroom most of the time. You didn't complain, watching your favorite movie with Chinese food was all you needed. Just one time, you got out of the room to find something to drink. Before entering the living-room, where your boyfriend and his friends were, you heard one of them asking which type of girls Seonghwa was usually attracted to in high school. "Well... I can't really remember because I was mostly focused on practicing and studying." He replied. "Come on, you can’t remember your old taste?" Insisted one. "Hum... I was into sexy girls at that time. Like these ones who know what they're doing." He winked.

Since then, you couldn't stop to think about it. You were not really what we can say "sexy", just normal or cute most of the time.

Motivated to show Seonghwa what you were capable of, you asked advices to your friends and elaborated a complete plan. "Y/N! I'm here!" Greeted your boyfriend, locking the door behind him. "Oh wow, it smells so good." Seonghwa walked in the kitchen, curious to see what you were cooking. Gently, he pecked your cheek before asking: "Lasagnas? Are we celebrating something?" "I don't know... I just wanted to eat this." You started. "Or I would eat you instead." Seonghwa chocked with his saliva, not expecting you to say something like this. Proud of this reaction, you winked. Even though you tried to act the sexiest possible, it had the opposite effect. When you saw the light smile on his face, you were wondering if you should go to the next level. Not thinking twice, you dipped your finger in the tomato sauce before licking it, suggestively, in front of your boyfriend. "You cute." Whispered Seonghwa, patting the top of your head. "Cute?!" You repeated, confused. "Yeah?" "I was trying to be sexy!" You put your hands on your hips. "Yeah, but the sauce dripping off your chin makes you look cuter than sexy." He smiled, before heading to the bathroom. "Shit." You mumbled, wiping the sauce nervously. "If you act like this because of what I've said 2 weeks ago... stop thinking about it. I was a simple teenager." He yelled from the other room. "So, you are not really into sexy girls?" You yelled back. "No. I'm into you idiot." He replied, before closing the door. You smirked happily. "Well... that's everything I needed to know."

YUNHO

The whole day, you acted suggestively with your boyfriend. He noticed and counted how many times you bit your lip or whispered casual talks right in his ear. Of course, he was affected by your action, he was a simple man. But most of the time, he found you cute. Like right now, you were at the theater and your hand was resting on his thigh the entire time. The only times you were removing it, was when you rushed to plunge your hand on the popcorn pack just to touch his hand. Yunho tried several times to suppress the laugh coming from his throat. He ignored if you were doing this on purpose or just because your period week was coming. "Should we go to our favorite restaurant after the movie?" You suggested, whispering right in his ear, hand on his chest. Yunho glanced at you, trying to perceive the reason of your actions, but nothing, not the usual lust sparkles in your eyes when you are on your period. "Sure, if you are still hungry after this giant pot of popcorn." He smiled. "I'll be. But I have other plans for the dessert." You winked before turning your face to the giant screen. Your boyfriend couldn't leave his eyes from you, wondering where this sudden libido was coming from. After the movie, you walked 15 minutes until the restaurant. Inside of you, you were trying to know how you could prove him that you were the sexiest girl ever. Just before finishing the main meal, you decided to attack again. As he was resuming how went his last week, you slowly passed your foot on his legs, trying to excite him as possible. The only thing you didn't know was that you were kicking him more than anything. Yunho spotted too, the flustered look on your face. You were focusing on your mission. "Babe." A laugh escaped from his lips. "You are hitting me." "Huh?! I'm sorry!" You put your foot down, worried. "It's okay," he giggled. "But what's got into you?" "Oh, so you noticed." You hid your face behind your hands, completely ashamed. "You are really asking me if I noticed that you almost jumped on me as if I was the last hamburger in the fridge?" He held your hand on the table. "I'm just trying to add spiciness to our relationship." You sighed. "We don't need that Y/N. We are all fine and I won't get bored." He tried to reassure you. "Really?" Yunho nodded, trying to comfort you. "Okay then." You smiled. "So... we are all good now?" "Yeah." "Good." He rubbed his thumb on your hand. "But can you remove your foot in the middle of my legs now?" "Oops. Habits." You shrugged.

YEOSANG

You really thought that Wooyoung recommendation was just another action movie. Until the main actress started to make out or act suggestively with everyone, she was close to. Of course, you had no problem with that. It just made you wonder if you could act like this with Yeosang. You were not officially in a relationship, yet, but you were acting like one. At the next hot scene, you glanced at him. His eyes were glued to the TV screen, looking every actress' moves. For sure, he liked what he was watching to. Maybe you should give it a try. You had nothing to lose except your ego. But what if he laughs so much that you become insecure?

Yeosang looked at you weirdly when you slapped your forehead to erase these stupid thoughts. "You... okay?" "Yeah! I just need something to drink." You threw the blanket off and almost ran to the kitchen. You grabbed a bottle of water but didn't find any clean glasses on the cupboard. Was it a sign? You stared at the bottle and guessed if you could do something with. "Did you find water? I think that's all we have left." Said Yeosang.

"It's my time to shine, you thought."

You walked back to the living-room, bottle in the hand. "It's pretty hot here no?" You faced yourself with your free hand before tugging on the collar of your shirt. "I'm okay, but you can open the window, I don't mind." Not adding anything else, you opened the bottle and sipped into it. When you made sure Yeosang was looking, you poured 'accidentally' water on you, especially down on your chest. "The hell Y/N!" Gasped Yeosang, grabbing a pack of tissue. "Argh sorry! I'm so messy." You pouted, grabbing a tissue to wipe your chest. Yeosang stopped on his track. "Am I dreaming, or you are trying to act like her?" He pointed at the TV screen. You rolled your eyes. He was too smart. "I failed right?" "Completely." He smiled. "But nice try, that was cute." "I wasn't trying to be 'cute'." You air quoted, sitting down on the couch. "You need to practice, to be at my level of sexiness." He added proudly. "Shut up Kang Yeosang." "Sure. Cutie." He laughed.

SAN

"Hello bonobos!" You greeted the whole group when you entered the practice-room. "For the 1601st time Y/N-" Started Wooyoung. "We are not bonobos." You said at the same time. "I know Woo. I'm just teasing you because I know you hate that." "San, get your girl before I say something I regret." "Babe stop teasing him or he's going to explode." Giggled San. "That's why it's fun." "What are you doing here by the way? I thought I was the one supposed to come over?" "I wanted to practice a bit. With you." You said removing your jacket. Honestly, you wanted to see how your boyfriend would react if you dance sexily in front of him. To not be too suspicious, you wore a simple sweatpants but choose a really light and short croc-top. "So, what we are practicing today?" You asked, ignoring San's stare on you. "Thanxxx." He replied, brow narrowed. "Okay, let's go." You smiled, completely confident. You positioned on the side, behind the whole group to not bother them. When the music started, you tried your best to exaggerate every facial expression, every move, every body roll to get your boyfriend's attention. You caught him looking at you, times to times, but he didn't say a thing, too professional for that. For the breakdown part, you were freestyling as Hongjoong and Mingi while they are rapping. You tried to match San's facial expression, but it seemed so unnatural for you that you were tripping and wincing messily. The whole scene caused San to bust in laughter. Everybody looked at him. "Sorry." He apologized, hands covering his mouth. "But Y/N, you are too cute behind." You raised a brow. "You are trying so hard to be sexy, but it feels not right." He continued. A bit mad, you rolled your eyes and sat on the chair next to you. Still giggling a bit, San walked to you. "Don't be mad." He kneeled in front of you. "You wanted to surprise me? It's a success." "But I did it wrong." "Don't try to act like someone you are not." He held your hands. "But you do it all the time!" You sighed. "I just wanted to prove you that I can be sexy too." "I was impressed! Your dancing skills are really good now. And with the 'cutie' side, it was the cherry on top." You hide your face on the crock of his neck, "oh please... what a shame."

MINGI

"Candles ok. Music ok. Champagne ok." You checked all the things on your list. You made sure everything was ready for your night with Mingi. One last time, you checked at your reflection on the mirror. You applied a last layer of this red lipstick making sure it made your lips more desirous and kissable. "Y/N! You there?" Shout out your giant boyfriend. "Why is this so dark?" "I'm in the bedroom love!" "Are you sleeping already?" He asked, walking to the room. When he spotted the atmosphere in the bedroom, he stayed quiet. Ignoring how to react. "Is someone dead?" You raised a brow, how he could compare this atmosphere to funerals? "I know how stressed you were this week, so I wanted to help you out." You slid his jacket off him. "Oh my!- Your hands are so cold!" He complained. "Then remove your clothes by yourself and lay on the bed. On the stomach." "What are you planning?" "I'm just trying to help you. Lay down!" "Okay okay." Mingi removed his shirt and laid down on his bed, lazily. At the same time, you were trying to warm up your hands a bit. "And now?" He asked, trying his bed to not fall asleep. "I'm going to give you a massage idiot." You rolled your eyes. Taking a deep breath, you sat on his butt and started to spread oil on his entire back. "Y/N it's cold!" He complained again. "And you are scaring me." "Just stay still!" You replied, trying to not lose your temper. "I'll start." Slowly and gently, you passed your hands on his pale back. But when you pressed his shoulders, he gasped in pain. "You are the worse masseur ever." "Stop moving!" "I can't when you are almost breaking me in half!" "I'm just trying to massage you!" Not thinking twice of your actions, you grabbed the candle next to you. "It might be a little bit hot," you whispered. You delicately poured few drops of wax on Mingi's back. "Does it-" Your boyfriend yelped in pain, beneath you. You fell on the bed when he turned around to remove the hot feeling on his skin. "THE FUCK Y/N! IT BURNS!" "I just saw it on a sexy movie! The man seemed to like it!" You freaked out. "In a sadomasochist movie?!" He shouted, rushing to the bathroom. "I'm so so so sorry!" You rubbed your hands nervously. "You crazy!" "I wanted to surprise you!" "By what? Ripping my skin off?!" Well, seems like your romantic and sexy night was ruined. Don't believe what you see in movies guys.

WOOYOUNG

"Babe, are you sure about that?" Asked Wooyoung, sitting on this chair in the middle of the room. "Yeah!" You replied setting your sexiest playlist. "You never done this before! You don't need to do it now." "If your ex could do it then I can." Wooyoung stayed quiet. He couldn't change your mind anyway. Yeosang accidentally mentioned that he ran to Wooyoung and his ex-girlfriend stripping for him a year ago. You immediately challenged yourself. If she had the nerves to do it, no reason that you don't, right? "Are you ready?" You put your phone down, 'Careless Whisper' playing the background. Wooyoung puffed, not believing your chose this song over a thousand ones, more appropriate. "What?" You mumbled. "Nothing, just go ahead." He tried to go back on his usual poker face. Finally finding the braveness to start, you walked sexily toward Wooyoung. Even though, you tried to look confident, you couldn't make an eye-contact. Your boyfriend noticed your shyness. It caused his heart to melt for you even more than before. You stood up, in front of him, starting to sway your hips from side to side. The moves were pretty good, but it felt unnatural for him. He could see that you were trying your best. Your tongue tugged out of your mouth sometimes, because of the effort. When you judged that it was time for you to remove your shirt, your hands started to shake a little bit on your hips. Wooyoung started to feel a kind of horniness until your top stayed stuck around your head, causing you to tug on the side. Your boyfriend laughed so hard at the scene. His dolphin laugh making you shy and ashamed of your performance. "Can you help me please! One of my earrings is stuck too!" "This is terrible Y/N!" He laughed, putting your top down. "I can do it." "Do it when you'll be ready to." He pecked your cheek. "It's okay. No rush." "Wooyoung sat back on the chair, not breaking the eye contact. "What?" He raised a brow. "I can do it." You repeated, lifting your top once again. He was taken aback by your new tentative, but it didn't fail to make him laugh again. It was really a cute scene to see. "Stop you are being too cute! I can't handle it!" He wiped his eyes, arms around his abs to seduce the slight pain.

JONGHO

Your room was a mess. Clothes spread out on the floor, hanging messily in the wardrobe and few of them were falling off the chair. Why? Because Jongho can't stop mentioning that you are "cute". There's nothing bad about that. It's just that you wanted to be something else than cute.

You tried a ‘nerdy’ look, but it was a complete failure. With those glasses and the bang, he was comparing you to a shy uniform high school girl.

Useless to say that you changed your look the next day. And for what? A ‘tomboy look’. You thought that this one would work, but the beanie and the large cargo pants caused you to look tinier. It was a failure, again. So, these last days, you thought about a sexy look. You felt like this option was finally the one which will succeed. For the occasion, you pickled a black leather skirt and a revealing top. For sure, he will spot your nipples and this white see-through shirt. "Y/N! Have you seen my-" he paused, looking right at you. "phone..." You smiled proudly, satisfied by the expression on his face. "Probably under a pillow in the living-room." You replied as nothing happened. To continue this way, you placed your hair out of your neck. Exposing your skin. His favorite part on your body. "You should look there, instead of standing there, staring at me like a fish looking for water." "Sorry but... I just can't get over the fact that-" he gulped. You smirked, waiting for him to finally admit that you could be something else than 'cute'. "So adorable! He giggled. "Are you kidding me?!" You said, completely done. "How can I be cute this outfit? Especially this skirt! If I bend over, you can clearly see my butt!" "Have you seen how cute your butt is?" He giggled. "Looking cute isn't a bad thing." "But right now, I wanted to look sexy! Like the hotter I've ever been!" You pointed at your chest. Jongho's face softened. He needed to admit that you looked hot with this outfit. But you couldn't help, but to be adorable. It was just how he sees your face every day. "I can't. I just want to pinch your cheek and to drown you by a thousand of kisses." He shrugged. "Okay, I give up." You rolled your eyes, grabbing your pajama on the bed. "Oh please... don't be mad!" He chuckled following you. "Don't talk to me." You said before slamming the bathroom's door, in front of him. "Cutie!" He yelled to tease you. "I hate you!" "I'm kidding." He paused. Before adding, "cutie." "Choi Jongho!"

[maybedefinitely404]

For You Became My Lighthouse (Part 2)

Genre: hurt/comfort

Pairing: romantic Prinxiety

Content: argument, crying, a decent dose of awkward but it gets resolved!

Word count: 4.1k

Comment: This is the fourth time I’ve tried to post this--- Part 1 HERE!

Roman, is everything alright?

-Logan

Roman ran a hand through his hair at the message, checking the time at the top of the screen. It was late, far too late, so it was safe to assume that Logan had heard about the spat from Virgil. He should have been home by now. It was just… impossible to convince himself to actually leave the rehearsal studio. He had a younger acting class tomorrow and was perfecting his lesson plan- even though he already knew it was perfect, and his director had already approved it. Just, anything to keep him from going home.

He’d been a dick. Such was obvious; from the second his finger had hit send, he regretted approximately everything in his life that had led to this moment. That day had been particularly bad, overrun with rehearsals he was either taking part in or directing, and gearing up for tech week of a large production. Who knew trying to block a scene with a flurry of pre-teens could take so much out of you? Rinse and repeat the cycle with two more classes to teach back to back and an achingly long dance rehearsal, add in a desperate and fruitless search for a replacement lead in his upcoming directorial debut, and you’d have what Roman would categorize as a “shit show of a day”. 

All he wanted to do at the end of it was spend some time with his boyfriend, without having to talk about his day, so he’d suggested the most basic date his fried brain could conjur. Then his work desk was unceremoniously reacquainted with his forehead as he smacked it into the wood, letting out a groan that bordered on a yell. Luckily, minutes ago everyone had abandoned the theatre, and he’d been trusted with the keys to lock up from a stagehand. He just had a couple more things to do, and then he could drive home. 

Getting a reply of denial from Virgil was nothing new. In fact, he’d been warned in the transition from reluctant acquaintanceship to inevitable friendship, that he tended to veto ideas if they were sudden, or too daunting, or if he was just feeling shitty. It was something that Roman never considered a deal breaker, and he’d slowly come to much rather enjoy a night of cuddling and watching television than going out anyways. Call it ‘getting old’, call it ‘Virgil’s homebody ways creeping into his psyche’. So usually, getting his plans rejected was no big deal. 

Except for today, when he was well and past his limit of frustration, and things not going to plan. He’d typed out and sent the snarky reply far before he’d thought it out whatsoever, and ranted out complaints that hadn’t ever crossed his mind before, which he immediately regretted. In a moment of shame so great it caused physical nausea, he tossed his phone into one of his desk drawers and slammed it shut. 

It buzzed once, twice, and then went silent. 

Until, of course, it began to go berserk an indecipherable amount of time later, and Roman couldn’t ignore it. Seeing Logan’s text, along with about a million missed calls from him and Patton, broke the fragile sense of calm he’d tried to achieve while working. 

He didn’t want to go home and face his consequences. Childish, yes. Well deserved, also yes, but he was afraid of Virgil’s inevitable anger. If this led to a breakup, a fight that wasn’t recoverable, he’d never forgive himself. 

And now…

Roman, is everything alright?

-Logan

I can see you’ve read my text message.

-Logan

I’m at work. 

You’re inconceivably moronic. Get home. Now.

-Logan

Roman sighed heavily through his nose, clenching his jaw. He began typing out another snarky response- because apparently he never learned- when another text came through.

Virgil was in significant distress last I spoke to him and he has stopped answering me and Patton. Go. Home.

-Logan

Please. If not for my sake, then for Virgil’s.

-Logan

Fuck.

Roman barely had the sense to lock the doors of the building in his rush, throwing the spare key back in through the mail slot and booking it to his car. He sent some sort of confirmation that he was going and tossed the phone to his back seat. Virgil hated when he used it while driving.

It was only on the drive back, on unusually empty roads, did he realize it was well past nine. He hadn’t even noticed the time passing by.

Most of the lights in the apartment complex were still on when he pulled into the car park, but their window visible on this side showed only darkness. He wasn’t used to entering a dark apartment.

Their flat was silent, the living room only illuminated by the oven clock and the dim city lights from the balcony. He toed off his shoes as silently as he could, wincing when he kicked their shoe rack, and decided he’d risk turning on the light. When he finally found the switch and flicked it on, he couldn’t help his gasp. 

The room had once been a pristine display, he could tell. A white table cloth adorned their usually bare dining room table and a half burned candle stood as its centrepiece. He approached it in a daze, cautiously resting a hand on the plate of ravioli nearest to him. Cold. Long cold; the pasta was starting to get crusty. 

He picked up the two plates, intent on throwing out the food. It definitely wasn’t safe to eat anymore, and he didn’t feel like warding off an attack of ants in the morning. One of the towels hanging off the oven handle was drenched in what looked like marinara sauce, and it looked like there was some more spilled in the crack between the stove and the counter. That would be fun to clean. 

Both hands full, he opened the cupboard containing the garbage bin with a socked foot, and promptly froze. 

Part of him cringed at the clang the dropped plates made on the counter, but the louder part of him was just repeating a mantra of ‘holy shit, holy shit, holy shit’ and it was considerably out-screaming the other. Hands now shaking, Roman picked up the small box from the sink edge, ignoring the dried, crunchy texture of more tomato sauce on the outside, and opened it. 

It took every ounce of strength for Roman not to collapse to his knees, guilt instantly crushing the air from his lungs, a thousand times heavier than it had been before. An elaborate dinner, a ring… there had been a plan. That’s why Virgil had rejected his offer to go out. 

And he’d been such a dick to him. 

Speaking of which, where was he?

Roman closed the box and set it back where it had been. Their bedroom door was slightly ajar, and the most obvious place Virgil would be, so he padded over and creaked it open just a bit more. The light from the hallway cast a beam onto the bed, illuminating first a mess of hastily thrown clothes; his button up shirt he only used for fancy occasions on top of the pile. 

Virgil’s huddled form was easy to make out, curled away from the door, his only movement being the steady rise and fall of the blanket as he breathed. Figaro lifted his head from where he was settled in the crook of Virgil’s knees and gave Roman an indifferent mrow. 

He couldn’t get into bed with him. There was no scenario where that was the right move. It wasn’t the right time to talk about what had happened, not so late and when they were both riding high on emotions and tiredness, so accidentally waking Virgil was not the way to go. And even if he was sneaky enough to not wake him… a part of him just felt it was wrong. Not when he didn’t know Virgil’s stance on him at the moment.

Or his stance on the relationship.

Well, couch it was. He acknowledged the crumpled weighted blanket and sound blocking headphones- clear aftermath of a bad panic attack- with a quiet curse. Somehow that pit in his stomach got even bigger, making him nauseous as his shame took a physical form. 

He could only pray that they would come back from this. 

Roman’s sleep was fitful, to say the least. At best, he drifted into a state of half-consciousness, where his thoughts could be somewhat quieted down, but the discomfort of the couch and the heavy weight in his heart were still palpable. Inevitably, one of their neighbors would make a noise or the building would make a settling creak or a distant dog would bark, and the state would be broken, leaving Roman wide awake and wracked with guilt once more. He’d never noticed how loud the world was until he wanted nothing more than for the noise to stop. 

The sun was just peaking into the window when their bedroom door widened and Roman flew up, using the back of the couch to steady his sudden sitting position. When their eyes met from across the room, Virgil in his pajamas and face hidden in shadow, a tenseness settled over the room that neither had experienced in their relationship thus far. Virgil froze in the doorway, wavering slightly. It didn’t appear he wanted to be the one to break the silence. 

Roman stood slowly, as though not to spook him.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Virgil whispered with a sniff, and even in that one word Roman could hear the scratchiness of his voice. “I just...uhm,” He cleared his throat, “I just wanted to get some water. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I was already awake. No… no worries.” 

Virgil looked down to his feet. “When did you come back?”

“I think just before ten.”

“‘Kay.”

For an all too long moment, both of them seemed to find interest in every part of the room that wasn’t the other’s eyes. It wasn’t until Roman looked towards the kitchen in his awkwardness did he process what Virgil had come out for. 

“I’ll, um…” He pointed weakly to the kitchen and finally convinced his feet to move, filling up a glass from the sink while making a conscious effort to not look at the dishes or wasted food from the evening before. Unfortunately, he couldn’t stop the way his gaze drifted towards the box sitting next to the tap, and judging by Virgil’s sharp inhale, the look hadn’t been subtle. 

He took the glass back to the other, watching him take it with an uncomfortable, “Thanks.”

Virgil downed the glass in one go, his shaking hands almost causing him to spill. He barely had time to take a breath before Roman had zipped the empty glass back onto the counter.

“Do you want more?” He asked, already refilling the glass.

“No, I’m… it’s okay.” 

Roman placed the full glass on the counter quietly and the two were swallowed by heavy silence once again. The clock ticked impossibly loud as they stood, fidgeting, wanting this moment to be over but not wanting to be the one to start it. 

Virgil took a shuddering breath and wrung his hands together.

Roman stared resolutely at a single water drop making its way down the glass.

This was his fault. He’d started it. It seemed only right that he break the tension that almost suffocated him, so even as his mind screamed for him to shut up and every muscle in his body turned to liquid, he opened his mouth to speak.

“Virgil, I-”

“I’m sorry.”

That effectively stopped Roman in his tracks. All night, he’d crafted a collection of apologies, from eloquent monologues to stumbling pleas for forgiveness, but in not one of his countless scenarios had Virgil apologized. 

“I know… I know I can be a lot to handle, I know, I swear. And I was more outgoing when we first met, because I thought I had something to prove and it always exhausted me and I hated it but then we became… I don’t know, official? And closer and… and more comfortable and I didn’t think I had to do that anymore, I didn’t have to keep pushing myself so far!”

“V, stop-”

“The panic attacks and the anxiety and all that shit are a lot for other people and I know that but I didn’t know it was too much for you, I didn’t know you were tired of that and I can be better, I swear, I swear I can go back to how I was in the beginning, just please don’t leave.”

Virgil let out a choked sob and Roman couldn’t stop himself from rushing forward, intent on holding his stupid, stupid boyfriend until he realized this was in no way his fault, only for Virgil to back up before he could do so.

“I’m- I’m not trying to guilt you, I’m sorry, I just, I love you, and I can be better, I can, just give me a chance, please-”

“Virgil, baby, come here.”

This time when he reached forward, Virgil allowed himself to be pulled into his boyfriend’s chest, basically collapsing against him as soon as Roman’s arms tightened around him. The dam broke moments later and Virgil finally let go of his own hands to grab the back of Roman’s shirt with a sense of urgency.

“Please don’t leave, I’m so sorry,” he begged raspily into Roman’s shoulder.

“I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” 

Roman hung onto him almost as tightly in return, rocking them back and forth, finally allowing himself to cry. He shoved his face into Virgil’s hair, peppering small kisses and apologies to the crown of his head in between sobs. 

Virgil whined when Roman finally pulled away, but he didn’t go far, cradling his boyfriend’s face in his hands and wiping his tacky cheeks with his thumbs.

“Virgil, I cannot apologize enough for yesterday.”

“What are-” he hiccuped, “What are you talking about? It was my fault.”

“No, no, no no no no no,” Roman whispered, fighting that damn lump in his throat once more. “I had a spectacularly shitty day, and I took it out on you. I was leagues out of line. It wasn’t fair to you and I’m so, so unbelievably sorry.” 

As if the strings were cut on a marionette, all the tenseness dissolved from Virgil’s shoulders and he slumped forward, bumping his head weakly into Roman’s chest. “Can we sit down?”

“Yeah, of course.” Roman clumsily led him to the couch and sat on the adjacent cushion, assuming that if Virgil wanted to talk, he’d want his own space. His assumption was incorrect, however, judging by how Virgil crossed the space almost instantly and buried himself in Roman’s side like a koala. He shifted them both until he was laying on his back, Virgil splayed across him .

“I thought you’d be more upset with me,” He muttered, freeing his hand to run it through Virgil’s hair. His fingers raked through his own tears trapped in the locks and he grimaced.

“I don’t know what I’m feeling right now,” responded Virgil, accompanied by a shuddering breath, “I just need to know that you’re really here. And I need you.”

They were quiet for a moment, watching the sun begin to peek through their window, until Virgil spoke again sardonically.

“If this is a dream, I’m gonna be so pissed.”

Roman snorted despite himself and felt Virgil’s responding half-laugh from where he was tucked against him.  

“I agree. I thought I’d fucked up for good this time.”

A disgruntled meow made Roman crane his neck over the couch, watching Figaro stretch languidly in their bedroom doorway. The cat sidled over to his food bowl and sat pointedly next to it. Feed me. 

“Later, Figaro,” Roman groaned, all too comfortable with Virgil as his blanket. A small part of him was worried that if he moved them at all, the spell would be broken, and they’d lose whatever peace they’d settled into. 

Well, that wouldn’t do at all, not by Figaro’s standards. The cat gave an upset mewl and trotted over to the couch, leaping up with grace and batting Virgil’s legs. It was that pettish action that made Roman realize that Virgil had turned stone still on his lap. Figaro changed his approach to headbutting at his arm in a clear attempt to get pets, but Virgil’s hand stayed still by their sides. 

“What’s going through your head?” Roman murmured. 

“That stuff you said, about me… not contributing to the relationship…” Virgil croaked, and Roman stilled,  “What can I do to-… to fix that? Because I wanna fix it.”

“Baby, no,” Roman whispered, that shame-nausea returning, “I-” He groaned, dropping his head onto the arm of the couch behind him, “I was being an asshole. I didn’t mean that.”

Virgil didn’t budge, still deliberately ignoring Figaro’s futile begging for attention. “Then where did it come from?”

He took a breath deep enough that Virgil rose and fell with his chest, and Roman was struck with the profound urge to pull him closer and never let him go. But that would likely make him feel trapped, and that wasn’t productive. “You remember when I dragged you to that improv show my students put on last year?”

“You introduced me as your boyfriend and we found out the class had placed bets on whether you were gay or not. I don’t know how it wasn’t obvious.”

Roman gasped in mock offense. “Maybe they just were trying not to stereotype!”

“Your phone case is a rainbow-”

“Anyways!” He interrupted, resuming his gentle threading through Virgil’s hair, who snorted but otherwise gave in to the affection. “Remember what happened after?”

“Mmhm.”

It had been a fantastic show, and Roman had been exceedingly proud of his little students, especially since it was his first time ever teaching a class. After the night, when the betting chaos had settled and everyone quickly adopted Virgil as theirs now, they’d pleaded to play a few more improv games before the theatre closed. Seeing as it was their last class, hence the performance in the first place, Roman had acquiesced. But neither of the men had expected for the gang of pre-teens to latch onto Virgil and beg him to play too, despite him having zero theatre experience. 

“Remember what they said?”

“They tried to pack all your lectures into five minutes of information.”

“I don’t lecture, I dazzle.” 

“They thought you were straight.” 

“Only some, and that’s not the point!”

Virgil finally lifted his head, pulling his hands up so he could lay his chin on top of them. He smiled weakly. “Then what is the point?”

“The most important rule of improv is to keep the scene going. No matter what nonsense you have to pull out, just never leave a scene flat.”

There was a quiet moment while the other processed that before, once again, that layer of hurt reappeared on his face. He pushed himself off Roman’s chest in preparation to get up. “So… you’re saying you saw that argument as another scene you had to keep up.”

“No, shit, that came out wrong,” Roman insisted, and Virgil paused suspiciously, “I’m saying, that in a moment of panic, I fell back on bullshitting my way through it! That’s literally what I do for a living!” 

The distrust gave way to resignment and Virgil chewed on his cheek, turning his attention to the window. He sat all the way up on Roman’s legs, leaning back on his shins. “How do I know you’re not bullshitting me right now?” He said. 

“Because,” Roman followed him up, careful not to move his legs and dislodge his boyfriend, “You know I like when the bed is made, and even though you hate making it, you always do when I’m out of the house before you.”

Virgil looked down at his thumb.

“Because you let me choose the music in the car.”

“... you don’t like loud music,” He muttered, picking at the skin around his cuticle.

“You adjust your work schedule to come to every single one of my shows.”

He shrugged. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Yeah, but you hate working mornings. You let me rant about all my theatre stuff, even if you don’t get any of it.”

“I’m learning.” A faint smile was breaking through.

“You tell me when there’s spinach in my teeth, or my hair is messy, or if I’m acting like an asshole.”

“Well, that’s easy enough.”

Roman reciprocated the smile at that, taking Virgil’s hands in his own to stop the attack at his nail. “I’ve been watching you better yourself for years, even if it’s been really, really hard.”

“What does that have to do with us?” Virgil asked with a small blush, switching his fidgeting tactic to fiddling with Roman’s fingers. 

“Every time you do something that betters yourself, you help us, Virgil.” He leaned forward slowly, giving Virgil the time to move away if he wanted to, and rested their foreheads together. “Yesterday, I fucked up. Badly. You said you were anxious and I still acted like a dick. I kinda thought you’d hate me.”

“I could never hate you,” Virgil whispered, seemingly before he had a chance to process it, because his blush multiplied tenfold. Roman grinned. 

“Aw, is someone feeling sappy?”

“Shut up, jackass,” He retorted, bonking their heads together ever so gently. 

“I’m so sorry, Virgil,” Roman said after their giggles and blushes had faded, “It won’t happen again, I swear.” 

In lieu of answering, Virgil closed the already scant distance between their lips, and despite Roman using all of his self control to not sigh into it, he found himself doing so anyways. All the tension bled out of his shoulders at once as Virgil pulled away, pressing one more peck to the tip of his nose, and then leaning back with a small smile. 

“So… that means we’re good?”

“We’re good.”

“Thank god,” Roman groaned, flopping back and dropping his arm over his eyes dramatically. He heard Virgil’s quiet snicker before he resumed his job as a blanket. Except this time, instead of nuzzling his head into Roman’s neck, he could feel the distinct edge of a chin digging into his sternum.

The hand lifted from his eyes to see Virgil staring at him, that goofy little smirk on his face. 

“What?”

“I love you, idiot.”

Well, now they were wearing matching goofy little smirks. 

“I love you too.” 

That seemed to satiate him, because he gave a little nod and laid his head more comfortably on the other’s chest. He could have left the conversation there, content to just let them lay there in peace until the world fell away- or Figaro grew more insistent on being fed- but Roman just couldn’t banish the one persistent thought in the back of his mind. 

“Were you actually going to propose?” He blurted.

Virgil tensed for a moment, and then gave a resigned sigh. “...Yeah.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well,” Roman furrowed his eyebrows, desperately hoping he sounded casual, though his heart was pounding far too loudly to not be heard, “I would have said yes. If you did.”

“Oh?” Virgil lifted his head. “You’re blushing, Princey.” He could hear the smug grin.

“Nooo…” Roman whined. His arm draped once more over his eyes in a weak attempt to hide the redness, but he drew it away only moments later when Virgil didn’t retort. 

The man was staring at him with an odd mix of disappointment and amusement, huffing out a breath as he watched Roman’s eyes.

“This wasn’t how I was planning to propose,” He sighed, “It was supposed to be all perfect, and romantic, and stuff. And the surprise is ruined now.”

“I’m sorry,” whispered Roman, continuing before Virgil could cut him off, “If it’s any consolation, I think a proposal in our pajamas, on the couch, would be very us.”

“You’re not in pajamas.”

“I slept in these clothes, they count as pajamas.”

Virgil snickered. Roman counted five breaths as the other’s face melted from a smile to anxiously knit brows, worrying his lip between his teeth as he looked down at him. It took another three for him to speak.

 “So…uh... will you…?”

Roman’s face split into a grin, “Yes, Virgil. Obviously.” 

Virgil’s expression morphed to match his and he swooped down to kiss him again, though they barely could with how much they were smiling. They both devolved into giggles, happy to just stay wrapped in each other’s arms, until Virgil broke away with a gasp.

“Let me grab the ring!”

“Ring can wait,” Roman argued, tightening his grip around his waist to keep him in place, “I want cuddles.”

And so they did.

Taglist:

@max-is-tired

@private-snippers

@joylessnightsky

@marshymoop

@larkiaquail

@noemiescuriosity

@mycatshuman

@cirishere

@vpow

@ray-does-stuff

@sirprplsnail

[who-ever-said-i-was-nice]

Hi! Can I ask an ikevamp request where the boys find MC's sketchbook and is filled with drawings and doodles of them? If all of the suitors is to much, then just do for Jean, Will, Theo, Mozart, Leo and Comte. Have a nice day! ^^

Bruh this is a genius idea @jeanstan . First of all thanks so much for this request and second of all of coarse I will do all the suitors. Why? Because I’m awesome. No I’m kidding, I’m literally the most clumsy, airheaded  person on this planet. Think brain fried Kaminari energy. Also I’m really sorry this took this long. Anywhooo let’s get into it shall we. Tags:      @nad-zeta​

Ilevamp suitors finding mc’s sketchbook

Comte

you where just chilling in his armchair and doodling him when sleep over took you and fell asleep

being the gentleman he is he picked you up and set you down on his bed tucking you in nicely

then he noticed your sketchbook on the armchair

not even mr. Perfect-guy can resist tacking a little peek at it

so  he just looked at the page that was already open

an there he saw a pretty good drawing of him

Comte to his brain: take a peek you said. it will be fine you said. why are you looking through it. you said.

yup he ended up going through your entire sketchbook

he then wrote a little thank you next to your most recent drawing and set it next to you.

when you saw his little note you blushed, but at least he liked it

Leonardo da sleepy

you where both just sitting in the library

you got a bit hungry so you left to get a snack but you accidentally left your notebook there

you know this guy has a thirst for knowledge and that includes figuring out what’s in your notebook

he will pick it up and flip it open expecting to see notes or random drawings

nope nope he sees a bunch of drawings of him with notes like * damn that smile owns my heart* or * UUUUUUH why is he so annoyingly adorable*

This guy has the biggest smirk plastered on his face. when you come back into the room

“ I didn’t know I was annoyingly adorable Cara mia”

cue you turning tomato red

Napoleon

you where sparring ( or where watching the boys spar whatever fits)

after a few rounds you decided to get a drink and offered to bring drinks for the boys too

Jean excused himself and went to the bathroom and Leon was left alone

now your sketchbook was already just on the ground next to your hoodie

he didn’t touch it ‘cause he’s nice, but now..

he decided to take a peek

and he saw a sketch of him sparring

he flipped through it and found more pictures

him sleeping, him laughing, him teaching the kids the best thing that would describe him in this moment that meme: mha heart mah soul

and you catch him with the notebook in his hands

he just walks up to you and hugs you

Isaac

little bean

he stumbles across it by accident, literally stumbles

you dropped it and he tripped on it

he’s like the f is this?

he picks it up and opens it

oh my Lord

he’s as red as an apple ( pun intended😏)

there are a bunch of doodles of him some where he’s holding Harry, some where it’s only him looking through his telescope or just off into the distance

you: Hey Isaac have you seen my...

Isaac: no I haven’t seen the notebook, idk about a notebook, what is a notebook even

poor boy

you just hug him and reassure him you’re not mad, when he mumbles an apology

Jean

precious bean yes Isaac, Jean and Vincent are all beans. COME @ ME

so you carried that notebook around everywhere you went and while he is not as attentive as Arthur he still noticed

so when you left your notebook in his bedroom after bringing him breakfast he couldn’t resist the urge to take a peek

when he sees a bunch of drawing of him he’s..torn

on one hand he’s moved and is actually happy that you drew him on the other he doesn’t understand why you would want to draw someone as impure as him akgkgakgskgfau LOVE HIM PLS

when you come back into the room you panic a little ‘cause he’s staring at it with a blank expression

but then he apologizes and your panic melt away

he ask you why you drew him and you if play the “because I love you” card he will be shocked and happy and confused and surprised...( the list is so long A decided it would be best to just ad an etc. over here)

you hug him and reassure him he is important and you love him

Arthur

ok so he knew that the sketchbook was important to you right of the bat

being the annoying sweet person he is he decides to pester you more then ever

“ Whatcha got there Luv?” “It’s my notebook” “Can I see what’s inside” *flashes a severely annoyed look* “Arthur this is the 7th time today and i have the same answer. No.” “ Oh come on doll it’s just a peak” “It is closed for a REASON!”

Yeah you might have snapped at him a little but his ho guy ain’t giving up

so of coarse when you leave your notebook in his room he will act like he didn’t notice until you leave and then he will scramble out of his chair and nab the notebook

he opens it expecting a diary or just a bunch of notes only to come face to face with a bunch of pictures of him

he’ll raise an eyebrow and keep looking until he finds a very beautiful and realistic drawing of him sleeping with Vic and he looses his shit

he’ll run to you and pull you back into the room to cuddle and tell you how much he loves you no he’s definitely not crying

you don’t get what’s happening until he tells you he saw your drawing and you will turn slightly pink but honestly you just can’t be mad

Mozart

ok so we all know that when he finds this notebook he’ll be stone-faced  

you ain’t getting no type of emotion out of this tsuntsun

that is until he’s in public

once he’s in his room oh boy

at first it’s just a hint of a smile, but it gets bigger and bigger until he’s smiling like a dork as he inspects your drawings

he’ll never admit it but the fact that you drew him really warmed his icy heart

he even finds one where he’s by a Christmas tree smiling and a little note next to it saying “I’ll make him smile like this one day”

he closes the book and puts on his stone face again and leaves his room

in the corridor he runs into you

“ Hey, Wolf?” “What do you want.” “Isn’t that my notebook?” “Yes it is.” “So why do you have it?” “....Inspiration.”

yup now he has that notebook with him on the piano and only let’s you get it back if you want to doddle in it some more

Theo

you where cooking in the kitchen, whipping up some pancakes for the brothers

Theo came in to complain that there wasn’t enough syrup on his pancake and you flashed him a death glare and told him to get some from the cupboard

as he grumbles to himself h notices your sketchbook  on the counter

and he proceeds to open it and go through it

he sees a bunch of pretty decent drawings of him and he’s surprised

he’ll act all tough but he’s really happy

“ Oi, Hondjie! What is this?” he shows you your most recent sketch. The one where he’s walking King with a faint smile on his lips.

you instantly go bright red

“ Put that down! You where not supposed to see that! There not good just put it down”

he’ll sigh and pull you into a hug

“ I like it”

Vincent

smol bean

you left it in his room and he just wanted to take a peek

and he opened it up and saw a punch of sketches of him

they even had notes like “uhh stop moving you hand” or “how can someone be this pure”

he’s moved

will go and find you and apologize for looking in your notebook and will tell you how cute your drawings are

all in all he’s a sweet little angel but like who expected  anything else

Dazai

funny how he can’t remember your name but can remember exactly were you hide the sketchbook when you can’t take it with you

yup this guy just went and took it

he has no shame

he flicked trough it and smiled to himself

the drawings where adorable and funny and he loved it

you strait up walk in on him with the sketchbook and he just smiled at you

you turn pink trying to explain why you drew them

buuuut he just twirls you around and pules you into his lap smiling and you go over the drawing together recalling happy memories  

Sebastian

did somebody say Sebastian appreciation hours

You can’t really hide anything from Sebas can you

you went out to get groceries and he was cleaning up around the mansion

you had left your notebook tucked behind one of the library shelves and as he was dusting he found it

he opened it not knowing it was your notebook

he realized soon enough though

he just starred at the pages full of drawings of him

you waked in and he just calmly put the notebook down

he asks why you drew him and you turn pink

as you try to formulate a coherent response he sighs and makes his way to you

he gently flicks your forehead and smiles

“I never said I didn’t like them”

Will

ok so lets talk about our dear yandere boy Will

you hang out a lot at his villa

usually you are accompanied by Vincent

but today he remembered he had a painting to finish and left

you offered to walk him to the gate and he gladly accepted

however you forgot your sketchbook on the dining table

William instantly noticed this and couldn’t help but take a peek

he’s shooketh

the drawing are so cute  he really likes them

you come in and he smiles at you

your kind of embarrassed because 1 you didn’t want him to see that and 2 he asked you if you could draw in front of him

“ The way thou hand moves across this paper mesmerizes me”

you turn bright red but your happy he likes it

[samadiw]

Hogwarts Library - Part 03 😘🔥❤

.

True to his word, Draco left Hermione well and truly alone, except a book she had wanted for ages was waiting for her on the table in their shared dorm and on another occasion her favourite flowers greeted her when she entered after a long day of classes.

H : "I know what you're doing, Malfoy."

D : "Haven't the foggiest, Granger."

He closed the book he was reading, walked into his room and closed the door behind him.

Hermione couldn't help but smile, she plucked a long stem rose out of the bunch, inhaled deeply, took it with her and placed it on her bedside cupboard.

The man was getting under her skin, she was shocked that he knew so much about her.

But strangely after that sweet gesture, everything stopped.

Malfoy barely looked at her, he was always deep in conversation with Blaise or Theo but would light up like a bulb when the owls brought their morning post.

Hermione couldn't help but feel resentful.

Despite her overall, fuck him approach, there was a softness in his eyes that melted or rather clawed it's way into her heart.

She thought about him more often than she should.

Cheating sodding bitch, she silently berated herself.

A beautiful owl enters and lands gracefully in front of Draco.

Hermione huffs.

H : "Who the heck keeps sending him letters?"

Ron looks her way and raises a brow in question.

R : "Did you say something, darling?"

Someone was talking to her, oh, it was her boyfriend.

Hermione swallows hard and vigorously shakes her head.

H : "No, nothing, just practising a spell."

She can't help but stare at the Slytherin table, Malfoy pockets the letter after a meaningful glance at it.

2 days to 2 weeks

Professor Slughorn (PS) impatiently yells over the noise.

PS : "Yes, yes, hurry up and take your seats."

PS : "Good, is everyone settled?"

Slughorn frowns at Seamus and shakes his head disapprovingly.

PS : "Thanks to Mr Finnigan's latest dung bomb explosion, we are forced to abandon the classrooms and conduct classes in the library."

Seamus looks around him sheepishly.

Madam Pince : "Hmph.."

PS : "Granger, Malfoy, bring your cauldrons to the front."

Hermione looks up in shock and Ron's ears turn bright red.

She weakly protests.

H : "But sir, I already have a partner."

Slughorn tuts his disapproval.

PS : "Mr Weasley will survive without your assistance for the duration of the class:"

Hermione tries one last time.

Draco is already at the table in front and staring at her smugly.

H : "But..."

PS : "No buts, Miss Granger, I have a rather complex potion for you to brew with Mr Malfoy."

Hermione sighs in defeat, gathers her things and make her way to the front.

She clumsily arranges her things, avoids the ice blondes gaze and mumbles to herself.

H : "Stupid Slughorn."

Draco rolls his eyes and hisses.

D : "Stop your muttering, Granger, I have no wish to paired up with you either."

His smell was fucking with her again, what in the name of heaven was in his bloody cologne?

Hermione reels back from the insult.

H : "Oh really? Who's singing a different tune now?"

Draco raises a brow.

D : "What are on about?"

Hermione hesitates but gathers her Gryffindor bravado.

She keeps her voice low.

H : "I thought you liked me."

Draco narrows his eyes.

D : "And you made it clear that you didnt return my affections, am I supposed to wait for you to realize how incredibly thick you are?"

Hermione feels a tightness in her chest and struggles to find the words.

H : "I, umm..."

Draco loses his patience.

D : "Stop stuttering like a fool, show me the list of ingredients."

Hermione bites back a nasty retort.

H : "You are unbelievable."

Draco let's out a sarcastic laugh.

D : "Says the woman who told me to leave her the fuck alone."

Hermione pushes the list of ingredients towards him roughly.

H : "Here, take the bloody paper, I hope you choke on it."

Draco points to the jars and viles that already litter the table and muses.

D : "Make yourself useful while I fetch the ingredients."

Hermione presses her lips together and a wave of emotions wash over her and she fights the urge to not cry.

Oh, fuck no, she would not shed a tear for the incorrigible wanker.

Hermione lights a fire under the cauldron and starts to add the few ingredients they already had.

She cuts the beans with more force than necessary and sneers.

H : "Stupid fucking Slytherin, who the hell does he think he is?

Draco is highly amused by her reaction to his indifference.

D : "Granger, you need to stir anti clockwise, it's right here in the bloody book."

Hermione jumps at the voice and almost cuts herself.

H : "Can you not sneak up on me."

Draco eyes her fingers to make sure shes still in one piece and then scolds.

D : "Can you please concentrate, the faster we finish this, the faster I can send my owl to Victoria."

Hermione's mouth drops open.

Who the fuck was Victoria? Definitely not a girl in their year.

She crosses her arms over her chest.

H : "Victoria?"

Draco looks away dreamy eyed and smitten.

D : "Yeah, a woman I'm seeing, she's an old family friend."

Hermione retorts sarcastically.

H : "How bloody marvellous for you, this is exactly why I wanted nothing to do with you."

D : "And you were right, Victoria is the most intelligent woman I've ever met, she's the one, Granger."

Hermione fumes at the stupid words coming out of Draco's ridiculously luscious mouth.

Fuck no, intelligence was her thing and no bloody bint was going to take that away.

She conveniently forgot that she had never met this Victoria person.

His words hurt, they hurt bad and Hermione couldn't remember when she had come to care about Malfoy.

Hermione turns away and returns to cutting the ingredients.

H : "Well, good for you."

Draco eyes the woman next to him intently.

D : "Thanks, Granger, shit, I forgot one more vile."

Hermione quickly wipes the angry tears before he returns.

Tears? Really? You pathetic fool.

Draco watches from the small crack in the enchanted supplies room and grins, she was definitely coming around.

Playing hard to get had definitely paid off.

He walks back to their shared table confidently and adds the vile to the other complicated ingredients.

Draco starts to skin the crocodile tail.

D : "You okay, Granger?"

Hermione mumbles.

H : "Yes, I'm fine."

Draco softens his tone and decides he's messed with her enough.

D : "Hermione?"

The way her name rolls off his tongue sends shivers down her spine.

She asks in frustration.

H : "What?"

Draco moves closer and leans over her small frame.

His hand slips under the table and grabs hold of her thigh, his fingers dig into the flesh and a gasp escapes her lips.

He whispers almost reverently.

D : "You. Are. All. I. Want."

Hermione looks up at him, her breathing elevates and she bites her lip.

H : "Draco..."

Draco removes his hand off her person and stares ahead, his expression has changed from loving to murderous.

D : "Not here, not now, your boyfriend is glaring a hole in my rather handsome head."

Draco calls out over the noise of other students chatting.

D : "What the fuck are you staring at, Weasley?"

Ron looks as if he's about to explode, his ears are the shade of rip tomatoes.

R : "I'm watching you, Malfoy."

Draco smirks triumphantly.

D : "Then watch closely."

Draco tenderly caresses Hermione's cheek.

Ron flexes and makes his way over.

Hermione steps away, glares at Draco and stands inbetween the tall men.

She places a hand on Ron's chest and the other on Draco's arm and pleads for them to calm down.

Gryffindor and Slytherin stare daggers at each other and everyone has stopped what they were doing to watch the scandalous scene that was unravelling before them.

Professor Slughorn's alarmed voice cuts through the tension.

PS : "What in Merlin's name is going on? Back to your seats."

Ron balls his hands into fists and threatens.

"R : This isn't over, Malfoy."

Draco sneers and stares the redhead dead in the eye.

D : "I look forward to it, Weasley."

Hermione looks at them and dreads the walk back to the Gryffindor common room.

Fuck, her life was going to become very complicated.

[imjustthemechanic]

The Price of a Soul

Part 1/? - Agent Russel Part 2/? - The Letter Part 3/? - Miss Lake

Peggy and the real Agent Russel look into Miss Lake’s apartment, and find an unusual apology.

-

Both Peggy and Russel spent their mornings with a sketch artist, getting their memories of the mysterious woman’s face down on paper so they could be compared.  When the two drawings were finally placed side by side, Peggy was not at all surprised to see they could very well be the same person.  The woman who called herself ‘Kay’ had a pleasant oval face with a short, turned-up nose, the flawless skin Russel had already mentioned, and full lips that she accentuated with dramatic lipstick.  She was, Peggy observed, not so much strikingly beautiful in herself as somebody who knew her own good best features and how to emphasize them.

Dottie had been very much the same.

With that done, Peggy was finally able to stop by at a diner for some breakfast, though it was nearly lunch time and her stomach was growling fiercely.  Russel went with her.

“You’ve been eating all morning,” Peggy reminded him when he ordered the breakfast platter – bacon, eggs, sausages, potatoes, tomatoes, pancakes, and toast.

“I was in the trunk of my car for twenty-four hours, Agent Carter,” he replied.  “I could eat a horse.”

“I think you already did.  Have you called your wife?” Peggy asked.

He looked sheepish.  “I asked one of the police to do it for me.”

Mrs. Russel had probably loved that.  “How did that go?”

“I don’t know yet and I’m not sure I want to.”

“Mmm,” was all Peggy said.  It was a strange thing… men often treated their wives as foolish annoyances, yet at the same time they could be utterly terrified of them, as if women were less people than they were forces of nature.  “Well, perhaps you can consider it a learning experience.”

“Damned right,” Russel said.  Peggy wondered what he thought he’d learned.

“I suppose I’m going to have to go over the whole story of my interactions with Miss Underwood again,” Peggy remarked, as the waitress set their breakfasts on the table.  Oddly, it seemed less daunting now… as if telling it to the spy had been a reassuring practice run.

Russel cut himself a large square out of the edge of his pancakes and dipped it in syrup before stuffing it in his mouth.  “Save it for the next guy, Agent Carter,” he said around the mouthful.  “Call it a hunch but I think I’m about to be taken off this case.”

At least he was a realist, Peggy observed.  She sat quietly for a moment as he devoured sausages whole, then reached into her bag and took out the envelope.  “Agent Russel,” she said, “I believe our mutual friend may have given this to me.  Did she get it from you?”

He looked up at the envelope and frowned.  “I don’t think so.  What’s in it?”

“A piece of paper with six numbers on it,” Peggy replied.  “Seventy-nine, forty-seven, thirty-five, ninety-five, twenty-five, three.”  They had burned themselves into her brain.  She would never forget them, any more than she would have forgotten her own name.  “Does that mean anything to you?”

Russel shook his head.  “A code?” he suggested, and thought for a moment.  “Latitude and longitude?”

“It’s an island in Northern Canada, I already looked it up,” Peggy said.  “There’s nothing but sea ice for miles.”  Would that mean anything to him?  Did he know of her association with Steve?

He shrugged.  “The only thing I can suggest is call the Canadians and ask them to take a look.”

Not his, then… and he hadn’t known the name Olga Barynova.  Had the latter been a slip, or had ‘Kay’ deliberately fed her information?  And what in the world could be the meaning of the coordinates coming from a likely Soviet operative?  Before she placed any long-distance phone calls to Canada, Peggy really needed to find this woman.  The only question was, having done so, would they be able to get any information out of her?

Peggy had told Daniel where she’d be, so it wasn’t a surprise when one of the policemen came into the diner and approached their table.  “Agents?” he said.  “We traced that phone number.”

“Yes?” Peggy perked up.  She wouldn’t be surprised to find out it led to a pay phone, but that could at least be dusted for prints.

The man handed Agent Russel a piece of notepaper.  “It belongs to a room above the Botticelli Gardens nightclub on Hollywood Boulevard.  Some of the waitresses live up there.  The woman who keeps the records, Mrs. Lowe, said room four was rented to a woman named Katherine Lake.”

Agent Russel opened his mouth, but Peggy got there first.  “Did you show her the sketches?” she asked.

“That’s what I was going to ask,” said Russel.

“Not yet,” the policeman said.

“Then I’ll head over there at once,” said Peggy.

Russel nodded and held up a hand.  “Waitress!”  He snapped his fingers.  “Can I get the rest of this to go?”

“I thought you were being taken off the case,” Peggy reminded him.

“I’ve got a personal interest now.”

“Is that a personal interest in apprehending this Miss Lake, or a personal interest in avoiding your wife?”

“Bit of both,” he admitted.

He probably thought Peggy would need help with the investigation, she observed.  She just hoped he wouldn’t get too much in the way.

- 

The Botticelli Gardens was a located in a three-storey building designed to look from the outside like an Italian Villa, with red roofs, decorative columns, and a pair of under-watered cypress tress flanking the front doors.  At this time of day they were not yet open, so Peggy and Russel went around the side to the staff entrance and knocked.

The door opened to reveal a plump middle-aged woman of mixed racial ancestry, her frizzy dark hair only just contained in a bun at the back of her neck and a pair of cat-eye glasses perched precariously on her short nose.  Both Peggy and Russel held up their badges.

“Ned Russel, FBI,” he said.

“Peggy Carter, SSR,” Peggy added.  “Are you Mrs. Lowe?”

The woman heaved a sigh that suggested this was not the first time law enforcement had shown up on her doorstep this week.  “Yes, I’m Gladys Lowe,” she said.  “Now what?”

Peggy held up the sketch of Miss Lake.  “Do you know this woman?”

“Yes,” said Mrs. Lowe, not even surprised.  “That’s Kay Lake.  Arthur hired her about a week ago, but she didn’t turn up for work yesterday evening.  What’d she do?”

“Besides drugging me, robbing me, and leaving me locked in the trunk of my car?” asked Russel.

“Impersonating an FBI agent to gain access to classified information,” Peggy added.  “And possibly more, we’re not sure yet.  May we have a look at her room, please?”

Mrs. Lowe’s eyebrows rose and she whistled.  “She’s ambitious.  Most of them settle for petty theft.  Come in, she’s room four.  Are you going to impound her belongings?”  She was probably hoping to sell them.

“That depends on what we find, Mrs. Lowe,” said Peggy.

Mrs. Lowe showed them upstairs.  The second floor of the Botticelli Gardens was private party rooms for the VIP clientele, but the third was set aside as living quarters for the staff.  The rooms were tiny and cramped, with only one bathroom and one laundry for the lot of them.  Mrs. Lowe unlocked number four and Peggy followed Agent Russel inside.

It was empty.  There was a tiny bed, a nightstand, a small wardrobe, and a smaller vanity under the one grubby little window.  All the drawers and cupboard doors were open, to show that there was nothing in any of them.  The bedclothes were folded at the end of the mattress, so it was easy to see that there was likewise nothing under the bed.  The only thing in the room that would not have been there when Miss Lake moved in was a large brown paper bag on top of the folded sheets.

Peggy and Russel exchanged a glance.  “Mrs. Lowe,” said Peggy.  “Do you have any idea what might be in that bag?”

“No,” was the reply.

Russel edged forward and knocked it over.  It lay quietly on the mattress, showing no signs of being dangerous, and Peggy realized there was something written on it.  In block capitals, somebody had written: SORRY.

“Let me do it.  I have gloves,” said Peggy.  She pulled them out of her purse and put them on, then very carefully unfolded the top of the paper bag.  The first thing she saw inside was a leather folio… was that the one Lake had with her the other day?  Peggy pulled it out and opened it, and found it did indeed contain typed pages summarizing what was known about Dorothy Underwood.

“That’s mine,” said Russel.

“I expected as much,” Peggy put it on the bed and looked into the bag again.  “It appears your wallet and badge are in here, too, and a gun that I suspect is your service revolver.  We’ll have to get these dusted for prints.”

“Agreed,” Russel said.  “I’ll take them back to…”

“Ah-ah,” Peggy interrupted.  “I’ll take them back to the SSR and have it done there.  You’ve been taken off the case, remember?”

“Not officially yet,” he pointed out.

“But you’re sure it’s coming.”

Russel looked her over.  “Are you always this… intense, Agent Carter?”

“Always,” Peggy assured him, with a practiced deadpan.

Peggy called Daniel, and soon after the SSR arrived in force to take a proper, more thorough look at the room while Mrs. Lowe stood there frowning disapprovingly and threatening horrible fates on anybody who damaged the furniture.  Men covered everything with fingerprint powder and rapped on the floor, walls, and even the ceiling looking for secret hiding places.  They found none of the latter, but were able to obtain a reasonably good set of latent prints from the various drawers and the bedposts.  The size of these suggested they were a woman’s, or at least belonged to somebody with small hands.  There were also a couple of blonde hairs on the bedclothes.

Unfortunately, they had no suspect to compare these to.  Miss Lake probably knew that perfectly well.  They would have to actually capture her before they could prove anything.

While they were busy bagging the evidence, another policeman arrived, looking for Agent Russel.

“We’ve had a call from your office,” he explained.  “They want to talk to you.”

“I’m surprised it took them this long,” Russel sighed.  “All right, I’ll head over.”  He retrieved his hat from the hook on the back of the door of room four, and put it on.  “Good luck with the case, Agent Carter… and with Miss Underwood.”

“Thank you, Agent Russel,” said Peggy, and realized she actually felt a bit sorry for him.  It was true he’d been a terrible fool, but he’d never tried to deny that or pass the blame on to anybody else, and while he wanted to put off the consequences for as long as he could, he seemed to realize they were inevitable.  That was more than Peggy could say for a great many people she knew, male or female.  It was certainly more than she could say for herself in this mess with Dottie.

“Good luck with your wife,” she told him.

“Thanks.  I’ll need it,” he replied ruefully, and left the room.

Back in the SSR offices that evening, Peggy found an opportunity when nobody seemed to be watching, and brushed fingerprint dust over the mysterious envelope.  Several prints developed, and Peggy pulled out her own employee file so she could eliminate which ones were hers.   Quite a few of them were… but there were others that were not, and when she examined the actual page with the numbers, she found a print of the side of a hand where it had rested while drawing the star and circles, and a palm in the upper left corner where the other hand had steadied the page.

The prints were partial, and Peggy was not an expert… but the left thumb bore a set of four interrupted lines that looked very much like a thumbprint that had been taken from one of the drawer knobs in room four.

That seemed to settle it: the envelope had indeed been left by Miss Lake.  It had nothing to say, though, about the question of why.  Was this a trick, an attempt to send the SSR off on a wild goose chase so that Miss Lake could track down Dottie herself without their interference?  Or did the Soviets actually know where Captain America was?  And if they did, what were they planning to do about it?

[keeztickles]

•The Creative Lers Strike•

TW! Remus and Janus!

Ler!Roman, Ler!Remus, Ler!Logan for 2 seconds, Lee!Logan, Lee!Virgil, Lee!Patton, Lee!Janus/Deceit

Remus and Roman were both in Ler moods, and unlike anything they usually do, these two work together when it comes to tickling the shit out of the other sides. Get ready to die a million times from these little shits!

------

SMASH SMASH SMASH! "Guess who's hereeeee!" That was simply Remus with a tambourine, which he immediately threw to the ground.

"Remus! It seems the tickle tickle lers are out to play!" Roman's excitement could be seen from the moon and farther, maybe pluto saw the ler boi!

"Reeeeeeally now? I hadn't noticed!" Remus faked surprise, giggling immensely as he watched the other sides.

"Look at all those lees scattering, what do you wanna do about that?" Roman pointed out the scattering sides who were realizing what was about to happen to them.

"Who shall we attack first, dear brother?" Remus asked, crossing his arms, though the question was useless, as only one side was even in the room anymore.

~Virgil Segment!~

"Well despite being Fight or Flight, Virgie doesn't seem to be flighting." The twins simply jogged over to the emo who seemed to "accidentally" fall on the floor in his efforts to escape. Roman and Remus easily pinned him down.

"Another lee mood? Didn't I stomp that out yesterday?" Remus asked, one of his fingernails gently trailed down Virgil's stomach, making it start to spaz with trapped laughter. "Clearly our power combined makes all the giggly lees appear!" Roman deducted, he summoned a paint brush, and went after Virgil's ticklish neck.

They currently weren't planning on murdering him with tickles all day, they had 3 other little lees to catch, and all three of them were very good at pretending to be lers when they we truly very giggly lees! So the future is scarily exciting for the two creative twins!

Virgil continued his attempts to not let out any laugher, but his breaths got increasingly panicky as Remus's gentle fingers inched closer and closer to the current giggly sides belly button.

"The walker walks around the hole! Wondering how it came, he goes to the edge.."

"Remus NO!"

"And checks it out..."

"R-REEMUS-"

"aND FALLS ONCE IT CAME!" Remus digged both of of his hands into Virgil's mystical belly button, while Roman's fingers trailed everywhere else, his neck, his stomach and sides, his thighs and feet, the two princes were having a ride, leaving verbal teases all over the air for the very laughable emo.

Though the teases were also excruciatingly flustering, since these cute twins were very creative! We love some unstoppable tickly twins!

"Look Virgil! Are you seeing how much your tummy is jumping? You must be loving this!" Remus cooed, watching the emo's stomach.

"Virgil! I've forgotten how much you loved being tickled! Especially on your cute little thighssss!" Roman cooed, delighted to find out that Virgil' blushy face became even more flustered.

"Tickle Tickle Tickle Virgieeee!" The two lers happily cooed as they smirked down at the laughing lee, who was getting closer and closer to his breaking point.

Roman looked to Remus, and they both nodded, completely stopping their attacks, they went to each side of Virgil's stomach, keeping their smirk up. "And now, for our final act.."

Virgil, in his out of breath state, tensed up, watching the boys with a large grin on his face. The two leaned down at the same time, creating a raspberry on both sides of his stomach, making the boy in question laugh like hell.

"AHAHOHHOHOHOSHIHIHIHITFUHUHCKKYOUGUHUHUHYS" Virgil basically screamed out a bunch of cursed, before finally reaching his limit. "SANDERSS!"

Remus and Roman immediately pulled away, rubbed away the excess ticklee feelings, and summoned a bottle of water for the now very exhausted boy. "You go start up frozen two! We gotta go catch 3 other cuties!" Roman affectionately left a kiss on Virgil's forehead, as Remus gently picked Virgil up, and left him on the couch.

~Patton Segment!~

The twins left the room, going to where they saw the other sides run off too. "Who's ready to be tickled! You can't run from it cuties!" They continued to sing teases as they searched for a few more minutes, finally, they heard a little giggle, which they immediately froze by.

"..That sounds like a Patton!"

"Absolutely, Padreeee! Come out and play! We'll find you soon anyway cutie!" Remus was completely joking, but Patton came out of the cupboard, completely red faced, he grinned softly, immediately raising his hands above his head.

"Awww! Do you want the tickles? I think he wants the tickles Remus!" Roman quickly went over to the boy, gently rubbing the father fingers neck with the tips of his fingers, making him let out soft giggles.

"Absolutelyyyy!" Remus wasted no time, immediately digging his fingers into Patton's thighs. Making Patton squeal loudly and fall into happy and giddy laughter, Patton immediately pulled himself to the floor, feeling his legs become shaky.

Roman chuckled softly as he quickly took the liberty of tickling Patton's neck and ribs, making the boy squeal in very ticklish delight. "ROOOHOHOHOHO!" Roman titled his head, giving Patton a silly face. "Whaaaaaat? I'm simply giving you what you clearly asked for! The tickly tickly tickles!" Roman cooed, leaving a small raspberry on Patton's neck, which made Patton into a happy snorting mess.

"Squeezy Squeezy! Squeezeeeeeee!" Remus happily sang, dancing slightly as he continued his attack on Patton's legs. "Dance your legs for me you pretty leee!" Remus smirked, gesturing to the kicking legs he was currently tickling the heck out of.

"Sanders!" Patton squeaked out, which the best beans immediately stopped their playful attack, retrieving water for the bean. He wanted soft tickles today, and that's what he got!

"You okay padre?" Roman gently asked, rubbing his back and happily helping him to sit up. "Yee! Thank you cuties for this experience." Patton giggled softly before taking a sip of his water. "Of course Patty!" Remus exclaimed, leaving a gentle kiss on Patton's forehead.

"Now, go join Virgil in watching frozen."

"On it!" Patton giggled, before jumping up and going into the living room.

The boys happily went deeper into the castle, knowing their next threat wouldn't be so easy to conquer. Remus had his slimy tentacles on standby, just in case they came into contact with 6 gloved hands.

But perhaps those tentacles were needed sooner then the duke thought.

~Logan Segment!~

Suddenly, the boys stepped into a room and were immediately caught in a trap, fully spread in the middle of the room, they yelped loudly, scanning around for Janus and sighing in relief when it was only Logan.

"My apologies, my dear twins, but you two are on a particular rampage that must be stopped." The teacher stood in between the two of them with a collection of items commonly used for tickling, Roman gulped.

"Logie you've been in a lee mood all week! I've literally seen you without shoes! That's a rarity bud!" Remus retorted, smirking as he saw Logan's face turn into a red tomato.

"Whatever sensitive feelings I obtained this week are currently meaningless, you two need to be dealt with." Logan stated simply, pulling up Roman's shirt, smirking at the trapped boy. "L-Logan! We can talk about th-THIS!"

Roman squeaked loudly, falling into happy and giddy laughter, quickly attempting to escape the bonds and attempted to protest in attempt in trying to keep his ler mood up, he knew Remus would save them. He just wondered if he was such a little shit that Remus would choose to save them after Logan was done with Roman.

"Awww, look at you now princey! Giggling up a very cute storm! If Virgil and Pat-" Logan squeaked as his hands were pulled away from Roman by some slimy tentacles, and was pushed to the floor.

"Y-You saved me?!" Roman let out a deep breath and looked at his brother in wonder, who was currently being untied by a tentacle. Remus rolled his eyes, rubbing his wrists after being untied. "Ro, this is our day, im not letting some bitchass nerd tickle you to death! Now! Let's tickle a little lee!"

Roman nodded, letting himself get out of the small lee mood he put himself in, and smirked as he felt his ler mood arrive back in full force. He gave the tentacle a small pat and dove to Logan's body, who Remus was already leaving very furious tickles on the teachers bare sides.

"Hi, bitch!" Roman affectionately cooed, kissing the laughing sides cheek before crawling down to Logan's feet, smirking as he summoned a feather. "So you decided you were gonna try to split us up, yes? Fat chance for that Logie! When together, the creative twins are absolutely unstoppable!" Roman cheered, giving a high five to his brother.

Roman leaned down, gently wiggling a feather on the ball of Logan's feet. He chuckled softly as he immediately heard a loud squeal of laughter followed by a very pleading nerd.

"Roman, R-Roman please don't, Roman im sorry!r-ROMAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHHAHAN!" The nerd squealed loudly, making both boys giggle softly. "Logie! I'm not even touching your toes! And yet your still screeching like a wounded animal!" Roman pointed out. "You must be reaaaaaaally ticklish Logie!"

"I'm nohohohohohohohohohohohot!" Logan squeals out, thrashing in an attempt to get the tentacle off of him, though to be noted, the tentacle, was able to be easily removed, Logan was clearly failing on purpose.

"Oh? You aren't? Then why is the usually stoic Logic laughing so much? you wouldn't mind if I tickled the tips of your feet then!" Logan's eyes widened in an instant before pleading as Roman took his hand away from the balls of his feet.

"Wait, roman please don't, I will do your laundry for a week, I won't criticise your writing, I will do the dishes without complaint, roMAN!" Roman glanced up at Remus, who had stopped his own actions and was just letting Roman have his own revenge, aw.

He smirked, and quickly started rapidly scratching Logan's toes, and the padded part of the foot, humming softly as the nerd under Roman went absolutely ballistic.

"SHITTTTTIHIHIIHIHIHIHIHIHIT!" The male screamed, giggling and laughing madly as he basically pleaded for his life. "PLEAHEHEEHEHEHEHEEHEEHEEHEESEEEUEHE!" Along with a favorite of Romans, "FUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHCK YOHOHOHOHOHOHOYOUOHUE!"

Truly, Logan was having an amazing time today, but sadly, all giggly men must have to end at some point! Logan endured a few more seconds of his favorite torture, before he practically screamed.

"SANDERS!" Logan called and Roman immediately stopped, and the tentacle disappeared, Logan happily took the water he was given, giggling happily from after giggles. "Thahahank you!"

"Of course you ticklish little cutie, go join Patton and Virgil, alright?" Logan nodded, and both the brothers stood up, glancing at each other. "Thank you guys!" The twins giggled and gave a loving nod before the nerd left.

"You know what comes next, right?"

"He's had all this time to prepare, why didn't we go for him first?

"Because Virgil is cute!"

"True-"

[Janus segment!]

"-Boys, Boys, Boys, I believe it's time for you two to lay down and submit defeat, or else I shall personally show you how." Janus walked into the room, all 6 of his hands were out, and on show.

The twins spun around, immediately getting into defensive positions of both defensive and offensive.

"Janus! It is not us who shall be submitting ourselves to the tickle attacks today! It shall be you!" Roman made a grand gesture to hide his nervous insides.

"I'm afraid not, Roman, I have a few tricks up my sleeves, because you two are a mighty force for all tickling kind, if you truly wished to absolutely wreck someone, you could, you both are the creative people here, you could summon anything with a blink of an eye." Janus explained, stepping closer to the mighty twins.

"So with that said.." Janus clicked his fingers, and suddenly the twins didn't seem to have powers anymore. "Let's make this an even fight, shall we dearies?" Janus smirked at the boys, wiggling all the gloved fingers.

The twins turned to each other and gulped, but Remus smirked, pulling a button out of his pocket, he did plan for Janus and his mischievous tricks!

"Sorry Jan, but we are the creative twins, we have plans for your plans!" Remus giggles, tapping the button and immediately all 6 arms were trapped, as well as suddenly the twins had their powers back. "Thanks Logan!"

Janus immediately attempted to get out of the restraints, trying his hardest. "Now boys, let's think about this!" Remus rolled his eyes, summoning two small tentacles and placed them in one of the sets of armpits, Remus placed them in the least sensitive part so that the only thing that emerged from the now swirling tentacles was soft giggles and snorts.

Roman viewed the tied up snek man, and giggled slightly, placing a individually mobile feather on one of his scaley melt spots, before happily tickling both of his individual arm pits with scratches and pokes. "Aww Janus! You are so adorableeeee!" Roman cooed the the tied up loud snek man.

"You are way too soft with him, he can take it, trust me, I've lived with the bitch for 20+ years!" Remus grins and starts to mercilessly tickle the armpits he was given, grinning madly when Janus's squeals go up and octave or three.

Roman watches Remus and nods, copying his brothers actions along with his own spark of genuine roman love.

"BOYOHOHOGOHOHOHOHOHOYSSSSSS!" Janus calls in an attempt to plead for his freedom.

"No can do Jan!"

"You wanted to try to destroy us! We ain't letting that happen!"

"Never! Tickle tickle tickle Jannnn!"

"Aw he isn't even fighting back anymore!"

"That's absolutely adorable."

"SANDERS!"

Immediately, the binds were down, the tentacles and feathers were gone, and immediate cuddles and water were given to the giggly side.

"You did amazing."

"Better then usual!"

"Remus!"

"Whaaaat?"

"Dude!"

"Anyway, lets go give the boys a lovely night of frozen, shall we?"

"Yessss!"

---

The two twins waddled into the living room, letting a small gigle out at seeing all the tuckered out lees.

"We will get you tomorrow."

"Sureeeeee, keep telling yourself that Virge!"

------------------End~

Oh boy, this is a long ass fic, I hope y'all like it-? Thank you for reading, pls reblog and like if u like it, thank u, I am new to the community, and im tryna be a nice human!

Keez~

[drawlfoy]

Kricowl

masterlist

request guidelines

yes i’m actually back now lol

also this gif is the most adorable thing i’ve ever laid eyes on i love it to the pit of my soul 

pairing: draco x grangertwin!reader

request: yes! thank you!

summary: reader is a gryffindor along with hermione. she originally shares her twin sister’s feelings about draco, but then when she sees something one day her opinions change...but the question is will it be mutual?

warnings: cursing. if you’ve read any fics before you know me well enough by now to assume

a/n: heyyy i’m back!! i finished my act on saturday without too much trouble. i either did really well or painfully mediocre. it totally depends on how good my guessing skills were that day. also, i’ve started a new job, which has been fun but has also filled up my schedule more than i would’ve liked. i’m back now, and you’ll notice that my fics are a little longer. i’m no longer planning on publishing 1-2 fics a day. instead i think i’ll write longer ones over the span of a couple days. thanks for reading, and as always, requests are open! i’ll try to burn through my current ones too, so if you’re still waiting on a request, it’ll be out in the near future!

music recs: i’m literally listening to creepy reddit stories asmr lol

word count: 4,317 (wow! longest one shot i’ve written!)

“Y/N!”

Hermione’s voice rang out from across the courtyard, pulling Y/N’s attention away from the little robin chirping excitedly at her from the bushes. 

“We’re waiting!”

Y/N rolled her eyes. Hermione and her obsessive scheduling.

“I’ll meet you there later, ‘Mione! I’m busy right now!” she yelled back, hoping that the robin wouldn’t fly away from her raised voice.

“Suit yourself!” 

With that, Hermione dragged Ron and Harry off to somewhere else, no doubt the library. Or perhaps the kitchens, if it was Ron putting the destination requests in. 

Y/N turned back to the robin in bush, still waiting and staring at her expectantly.

“You’re a smart little thing, aren’t you?” she cooed, fishing through her pockets. The packet she was looking for was in there somewhere. 

As she searched, she noted that the robin had an interesting mark on his orange chest--an odd sprinkling of grey feathers across the middle. The color difference only served to make the little bird more endearing.

Y/N’s fingers closed around the packet, sighing in relief and pulling it out.

The robin chirped when it saw the crushed peanuts, hopping on a branch just a tad closer.

“Easy, there,” she mumbled. “Give me a moment, darling. I just need to open it.”

Once she succeeded, she placed the peanuts on a branch close to the robin, smiling as the bird hopped closer and began to feast. 

“What are you doing?” 

Y/N spun around to see the last person she wanted to see--a confused but flushed Draco Malfoy, wearing that stupid fur hat and black leather gloves to ward off the cold weather.

“Being a charitable person, Malfoy,” Y/N snapped back, motioning to the bird, who was just about to finish up the peanuts.

“No!”

Y/N jumped, shocked at the sudden burst of energy from Malfoy. She watched, stunned, as the blonde boy leapt forward, snatching the bird before it could fly away.

“What the fuck, Mal-”

“Are you trying to kill this poor thing?!”  Malfoy cut into her exclamation. He was suddenly frantic, attempting to steady the bird in one hand and locate his wand in the other.

“What are you talking about? I feed robins peanuts all the time, they love them.”

“Are you daft, Y/N?” Malfoy snapped. “This isn’t a robin! Look at the grey feathers on its chest! This is a Kricowl, it’s not a robin! It’s deathly allergic to peanuts!”

“A what?”

“Shut up and grab my wand out of my pocket!”

Y/N had never seen her arch-nemesis look so scared as she reached in his pocket. The lining of his pockets was soft and felt obnoxiously expensive. His coat probably cost more than the price of everything in her room combined.

She pressed his wand into his free hand and watched as he pressed the bird down on the table next to them, muttering incoherent spells under his breath. Within a few seconds, the bird opened its mouth and began heaving, chunks of peanut coming out completely undigested. 

Stealing a look at Malfoy’s face, Y/N was stunned to see how concerned he looked for the little bird, even going as far as to reach out and stroke the soft, orange belly of the Kricowl. She could’ve sworn that she heard him whisper a pained “don’t you worry, you’ll be alright”.

Once the bird had seemed to expel all of the nuts it had consumed, Malfoy turned to her again.

“Go to the potion supply cupboard and bring back some knotgrass, you hear me?” 

Y/N turned and sprinted to the potions classroom, her sassy comebacks dying on the inside of her cheeks. It had become abundantly clear to her that Malfoy was not messing with her--why else would he have asked her to reach into his pocket?

She returned a few moments later, holding the knotgrass out to the blonde. He grabbed one of the leaves, twisting it over the bird’s mouth and landing a drop of something into its open beak. 

Within seconds, the bird was back on its feet and flying up, far away from both of the students.

“I had no idea,” Y/N breathed. 

“I mean...” Malfoy gave her a sideways glance. “I can’t blame you. It’s not like it’s your fault you were born inferior.”

Y/N bit the inside of her cheek as she thought. 

“But it’s your fault you’re such an intolerant ass,” Y/N responded. “I bet that Kicrowl is the only thing on this campus that appreciates you.”

“Kricowl. And thank you for your input, I value it so, so highly.”

With that, the blonde huffed and turned, sauntering off to wherever rich purebloods went after they said their mandatory bigoted remark of the day.

♥♥♥♥

Y/N had only ever spoken to Pansy Parkinson directly once, and that was plenty enough for her, thank you very much. Her vile nature was something that made Y/N wish she was a Kricowl gorging itself on peanuts. The one time they interacted had been when Parkinson had sat in Y/N’s newly assigned seat in potions in the beginning of term. Y/N had kindly asked for her to move, to which she had responded, “Sorry, I have trouble hearing those with with bad breeding. Can you come again?”

Y/N had sat in a different chair that day and for the rest of the days remaining. It wasn’t that she was afraid of Parkinson--no, she just had better things to do. It was so much more fun to goof off with Harry, Hermione, and Ron than to sit and plot her revenge. That was a Slytherin school of thought, and there was a reason why Y/N was a Gryffindor along with her sister. 

Unfortunately, she was unable to keep this quiet streak going with Parkinson. 

It was a crisp February morning, and Y/N was on her way to her first class when she heard yelling from her left. Swinging around. she saw Pansy shrieking at a pair of two young Hufflepuffs. She moved closer to investigate and soon realized that a crowd was forming around them, a group of interested students who were too afraid to step in. The Slytherins were grouped on one end, laughing like sadists and watching as Pansy’s comments caused one of the girls to start tearing up. 

Y/N moved closer, leaning her head in to hear what they were saying.

“-and YOU have the audacity to trip me!”

“It was a mistake, I swear! Like I said, I didn’t mean to!” the young Hufflepuff cried out, her voice jumping up a few octaves.

“No matter! I’m not attending a school where Hufflepuff halfbloods can get in my wa-”

“Excuse me?”

Y/N stepped into the circle the students had formed before she could stop herself, bracing herself for the impact to come. 

“I don’t believe I was talking to you, mudblood,” Pansy spat, digging her heels in and puffing out her chest.

Ignoring what the pureblood had just said to her, Y/N began, addressing everyone standing around the scene.

“Listen, can we just admit what Pansy is too embarrassed to?” 

Whispers began filling the crowd. Pansy looked like she didn’t quite know what to do.

“The Hufflepuffs didn’t trip her,” Y/N said, motioning to the two quivering girls next to her. “It’s her heels. We’ve all seen it. Pansy can’t walk in them, but she still insists on wearing them every day.”

Pansy stiffened up, glaring at Y/N, and then trying to glance anonymously at her feet, clad in heels that were ill suited for school. Everyone else in the crowd did the exact same thing. Laughter rippled through the courtyard as people began to remember all the times they saw Pansy stumble around in her shoes. 

Pansy turned a tomato red, spinning around and darting off, at least as fast as she was able considering her footwear. 

Y/N turned and left as well, but not before she noticed a pair of steel-grey eyes staring curiously at her. 

♥♥♥♥

As the days grew longer, Y/N became aware of Pansy’s wrath. The brunette would show up out of nowhere and mess with her by casting little spells to cause embarrassing wardrobe malfunctions or ruin her hair day and even trying to trip her herself. 

Y/N, on the other hand, had other things to be concerned with. 

One day in Charms class, Y/N found herself staring at a certain boy across the room as he lazily practiced Aquamenti.

His pale, slender fingers loosely gripped his wand while his cheek rested on his other hand, tilting his head slightly to the side. There was a peculiar way in which he scrunched his nose as he cast the spell over and over again, each time performing it perfectly. 

Y/N allowed herself to gaze at him for as long as it took for him to fully fill the goblet in front of him with water from the repeated Aquamenti charm, and when Malfoy finally lifted his head up from his hand and glanced over in her direction, she snapped back to attention, pretending to be intently practicing the spell herself.

Gulping, Y/N tried to fight back the blush that rose on her cheeks as she felt the boy’s eyes drag over her. Was he looking at her? She couldn’t say for sure, she was trying so hard to pretend like she hadn’t just been caught staring that she couldn’t naturally look up to see where Malfoy was looking, not now. 

She froze in her chair as she noticed the blonde get up from his chair and make his way over in her general direction.

No, no, no, there was no way, you’re just overanalyzing, there’s no reason why he’d come over here. 

Turning her head, she pretended to rummage through her satchel to pull out a quill for no real reason.

“Is there something in my teeth? Or do you just have a problem with my wand work?”

Y/N jolted, snapping her head back up to see Malfoy standing before her, calmly staring down at her. He was, impressively, much taller than she was. 

This is no time to be thinking of that.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about.” Y/N rolled her quill in between her fingers under the table in an attempt to her hide her nervousness.

“Oh? So why were you staring at me?” Malfoy adopted a rather amused face as Y/N was taken aback from his forwardness.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she retorted, setting her jaw and placing a hand on her hip. 

Malfoy’s lip quirked as he looked her up and down, apparently thinking about what he was going to say next. 

“Whatever you say, Y/N.” 

With that, Malfoy stalked back to his rightful desk, leaving Y/N shocked at the fact that he called her something other than Granger.

♥♥♥♥

It had taken Y/N a while, but when all she could think about was how soft Draco’s hair would feel if she ran her fingers through it, she had to admit that she had begun to nurture a crush on the intolerable pureblood. 

She didn’t know what started it, but she had a hunch that it had to do with his actions that day on the courtyard where he saved that bird, whispering those gentle phrases to it when he thought she couldn’t hear. Or perhaps it was the fact that he was referring to her by her first name now, and the way that it rolled off his tongue was so enticing--so pristine that it made her feel lucky.

She knew it wasn’t right. It was immoral to fall for the boy who had made her sister’s life hell for the better part of 5 years. She knew better than her inner instincts to save the “bad” boy. She knew that Draco was very popular with girls and that if she wanted him, she’d have to get in the back of a very impressive line of girls with more money and better families. 

But a stubborn part of her prodded these doubts away, reminding her of how many times she thought she had seen Draco staring at her out of the corner of her eye, how many times he “accidentally” brushed past her in the hallway. Granted, all of the incidents could’ve been sheer luck and, besides, she was far too shy to talk to him anyways.

So, as any rational 15 year old girl would do, she decided that there was no harm in pursuing him in her imagination. The deal was simple--she wouldn’t make a single move on him in real life, but her daydreams were fair game.

And so, it began. Y/N spent those few precious moments before she drifted off into sleep indulging in her most shameful desires. She imagined what it would feel like to run her fingers through the Slytherin Prince’s hair, to softly trace the outlines of his cheekbones. She wondered if his hands would be cool or warm to the touch, whether or not the icy paleness of his skin was any indicator to either of the options. She imagined that his skin would be soft from the expensive wizard soaps he’d use religiously. She imagined how he’d take his tea--strong with no sugar. 

Her feelings began to collide with reality whenever she ran into Draco in classes, He seemed more interested in tormenting the Golden Trio than he was in the earlier part of the year, forcing Y/N to acknowledge the uglier side of the boy whose lovely eyes she dreamed of at night. However, to her surprise, he never once uttered the word “mudblood” in her presence. In fact, she couldn’t even pinpoint the last time he had said it. 

His taunts became less about her sister’s blood inferiority, morphing into rather clever, witty, and biting remarks about the trio’s irritating amount of self-importance and righteousness. 

As much as Y/N hated to admit it, she agreed with some of it. Hermione, Ron, and Harry were all lovely people, but she often felt left out. Since Hermione had met them first, they grew closer to each other than they did to Y/N. They were plenty civil to her, but not as interested in actually being her real friend.

Not that she didn’t mind too much. She already got enough attention being vaguely connected to Harry. She didn’t know how she could handle being a target for all the anti-Potter propaganda and was much more content being as off the map and incognito as possible. 

But at the same time, it was a little sad whenever she saw the trio gain all the glory. They’d sneak into the common room late at night every once in a while, giddily whispering about some secret mission they were on that Hermione refused to tell her twin. 

“It’s not that I don’t trust you,” she would always say. “It’s just that if you were to slip anything to the wrong type, we’d be in big trouble.”

So in other words, Hermione just didn’t trust her to stay quiet. 

♥♥♥♥

Y/N laid on her back, staring up at her dorm ceiling and wishing for sleep to take her away. She’d accidentally blown up at ‘Mione when her sister had made a rather condescending remark regarding her potion brewing skills by telling Ron to not copy Y/N’s movements because “there’s no telling if she’s even remotely following the directions”. 

Y/N had snapped and told her sister off, calling her an insecure prick that only felt smart when she was putting herself above others.

“You know,” Y/N had told her, “people who are actually wise don’t feel the need to boast about it.”

Hermione had turned beet red, huffing and putting her back to her sister. Not a single member of the Golden Trio attempted to talk to Y/N after that, not even during meals. 

The true weight of her mistake was now heavy on her chest as she came to the realization that some of the most well known and well liked kids in her house were no longer speaking to her and that this was causing a good portion of her other friends to regard her with caution. She had eaten in silence that evening, studied in solitude, and sat up in her bed alone instead of joining the congregation in the common room. 

Now, not even her imaginary Draco would concern himself with her as she lay in the dark.

You git she thought. I created you, and this is how you repay me?

She’d been in her dorm for over three hours now. Sleep absolutely refused to pull her away, restlessness instead welcoming her with its open yet uncomfortable arms. Her sheets were far too warm for a spring evening and she had turned her pillow over to the cold side so many times that there was no cold side left to speak of.

Finally, with nowhere else to go, she decided to just get out of bed and take a walk. The brisk air would do her nothing but good, and if she was caught by a member of the inquisitorial squad, then at least she’d have some human contact to speak of for the day. 

♥♥♥♥

Y/N found herself at the top of the Astronomy Tower, absentmindedly looking for constellations and failing miserably. She’d nearly failed any question on an exam pertaining to astrological features. 

There was something relaxing and careless about the soft breeze licking at her face. It reminded her that nature didn’t care about her shortcomings or her sharp tongue. She was alive and breathing, and that’s all it took for the universe to allow her to see a beautiful night sky full of stars.

“I never thought of you as someone who breaks curfew.”

The familiar, snooty tone of Draco Malfoy’s voice broke the comforting silence. 

“Aahh!” Y/N yelped, jumping and grabbing onto the railing to prevent her from falling to her death. “Don’t sneak up on me anymore! I could’ve died!”

Draco let out a dark chuckle, propping his own arm on the railing and looking her up and down.

“Well, rest assured,” he told her. “I’m not the one with the murder plot. That’s Pansy. Watch your goblet in the dining hall, will you?”

Y/N couldn’t decipher if he was telling the truth or not, but looking him up and down, she observed that there wasn’t a trace of malice in his expression.

“Are you telling me the truth?” she asked, feeling her defensiveness drain out of her tone.

“Believe it or not, yeah,” Draco drawled, shifting his position so his elbow was supporting his body weight on the railing and his chin was being propped up by his hand in a very similar fashion to that one time in Charms. Now his height was a little closer to Y/N’s, and she could look him in the eyes without turning her chin up too far. “She won’t shut up about how she’s learned how to brew this potion that’ll make all your hair fall out or something. So just...I don’t know, watch out.”

“Aren’t you gonna take me to Umbridge?” Y/N asked, forgetting what he was telling her once she saw the moonlight reflecting off of his inquisitorial squad badge.

“Nah, I’m not in the mood to see that hag tonight.”

A laugh escaped her lips before she could stop it. 

“Oh. Thank you.”

The words felt foreign to Y/N. Things had really taken a turn for the worst--she had spent the past two months relentlessly daydreaming of the boy who bullied her twin, and now she was thanking him. 

Silence hung between the two, and to make things a little less awkward, Y/N turned her body away from him to look up at the sky. 

“Kill any Kricowls recently?” Y/N nearly jumped again when she felt a finger lightly poke her arm.

“Oh....no, I haven’t been feeding any birds peanuts anymore,” she confessed, turning again to meet the boy’s eyes. “I’m starting to realize how much I don’t actually know about the world.”

Draco regarded her curiously for a few moments.

“You’re nothing like your sister, you know,” he finally told her. 

“What do you mean?” Y/N couldn’t decide if this was a compliment or a thinly veiled slight.

“I mean, you accept the fact that there are things that you may not know,” he began. “I’ll be completely honest--I don’t tease Grang--your sister because of her blood type. That played a role when I was a little younger, but now it’s more because she’s an insufferable know it all that’s all holier-than-thou and probably wouldn’t have even let me get close to that Kricowl.”

“I can’t stand her sometimes,” Y/N whispered, looking down at the floor so she wouldn’t have to meet Draco’s piercing eyes. “I know it’s awful because I support the political cause that they support but they’re so...exclusive. I make one mistake and I’m out. There’s no room for accidents when you’re not in the trio.”

From her vantage point, she could see Draco nervously rolling his wand around in his free hand. 

“They aren’t very respectful to you,” he said after a few painful seconds of silence. 

“Well, it’s not like you’re a saint either.” Y/N dared to glance up at him to see a glimmer of hurt flash across his face.

“I know.” He shuffled his feet. “I’m sorry.” 

Y/N, stunned, jerked her head back up.

“You’re what?”

“Merlin, I didn’t think it was that monumental,” Draco mumbled. “I said, I’m sorry. Please forgive me for whatever nasty things I’ve said to you in the past. I’ve been trying to read more about why pureblood prejudice is the way it is, and I learned that.....er...”

Y/N noticed that he was struggling to get out what he was saying.

“You can’t tell anyone this, not right now at least, alright?” Draco nervously stuck his hand out. 

“Sure I won’t.” Y/N took his hand and shook it, noticing how she was right--his hand was soft and supple, warm enough to be pleasant but not enough to be sweaty. 

“Well I did some more research, and I learned that my family actually has some muggle blood in it...like, there’s a lot of half-bloods that married muggles and branched out, but they were still Malfoys at birth.”

Y/N gaped at him.

“And I don’t really enjoy hypocrisy, so I’ve...er...been kind of trying to reconstruct my political views.” 

“Good for you.” 

Y/N sat there for a little bit, grappling with all the information he’d just told her.

“Pinch me.” Her voice rang out before she could stop it.

“What?” Draco stared at her in wide-eyed confusion.

“It’s a muggle thing,” she told him. “Pinch me to prove I’m not dreaming. A Malfoy just told me that he wants to get over his blood prejudice, so yeah, forgive me if I’m a little surprised.”

“So you think you’re dreaming about me, huh?” A smirk appeared on his face.

“No, you...ugh! That’s not what it means at all!” She rolled her eyes to hide the fact that her cheeks were growing redder by the second.

“Well, you can’t blame me for being curious,” he said to her, his tone noticeably lower. Draco took his hand off the railing, rising up to his original height before stepping nearer to her. He was much closer than he should’ve been for a simple conversation. “You think I haven’t noticed how much you watch me?”

“I have no clue as to what you’re referring to.” She fought to keep her tone steady as he inched even closer. 

“Oh, I think you do.” He paused after ducking his head down to be eye level with her. “See, you’re blushing.”

“It’s dark out,” she said lamely. There was no way that this was real. She had to be dreaming.

“And? Still doesn’t change the fact that your cheeks are significantly darker than the rest of your face.”

“What are you trying to do?” Y/N surrendered, leaving his statement out to hang in the air unanswered.

“This.” 

He suddenly darted forward, his hands curling around her sides and his lips aiming for hers. 

“Stop!”

Y/N pushed back at his chest, holding her head back out of reach and glaring at him. 

His face looked immeasurably pained as he retracted his hands, putting them back in their pocket.

“I thought you wanted...”

“Maybe I do,” she told him, taking a step back. “But not right now. You told me that I had inferior breeding less than 6 months ago. I need some time. Please.”

Draco opened and closed his mouth a couple times, clearly not expecting this reaction. 

“I know what this is, Draco,” she told him, softer this time. “I know you’re trying to ease your guilty conscience by doing,” she motioned to the space between the two of them, “this. I’m not interested in that right now, understand? I haven’t forgiven you yet for all of those things you’ve done to my sister.”

He dipped his head down, clearly ashamed to have been caught in the act.

“I really don’t think that that’s it, though,” he said after drawing in a shaky breath. “I’ve always been...interested, but I could never allow myself to act on it, but now that I feel as though my beliefs are evolving...”

“That’s good, Draco, that really is,” Y/N soothed, stepping back towards him. “But I still need time. And so do you, to make sure you’re not fabricating all of this to hide your guilt.”

“That’s not at al--nevermind. You’re right.”

Y/N was struck with the thought that this was the first time she’d heard the words “you’re right” come out of Draco’s mouth in a situation where he wasn’t mocking someone or being sarcastic. 

“Can I take you to Hogsmeade, at least? This Saturday?” He swallowed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I have a better idea. What can Kricowls be fed?”

final a/n: feel free to berate me on how ooc this draco is... i couldn’t possibly bear to write some kind of kiss or any real physical intimacy in the end because i don’t think that draco would change that quickly and i definitely don’t think he’d have this level of an existential crisis regarding his blood purity before his task in 6th year. for this reason, i don’t think i’ll be continuing this fic as it’s already long enough and i don’t fancy writing more ooc draco, as cute as the request was. so if you requsted this....please don’t feel bad! i’m sorry if i didn’t give you what you wanted. i might rewrite this one a little later when i have more time and when i can do another series because i think if i were to rewrite this, i would make it much longer and give draco 2x as much time to grow up and redeem himself. ok, that’s all, thank you for reading!

[1-800-hellraiser]

I don't want to set the world on fire (Jeff the Killer x reader x BEN Drowned)

Requested by: no one

Words: 2,273

Genre: Lots of angst (itty bitty bit of fluff at the end)

Associated song: I don't to set the world on fire - The Ink Spots

!TW! Swearing, yelling, arguing, all that tomfoolery. 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

"I've lost all ambition and worthy acclaim, I just wanna be the one you love"

   You step down the concrete stairs of your apartment building. Your boyfriend, Jeff, wanted to meet at the nearby park. He said he wanted to introduce you to someone. You know Jeff works with a lot of people, so you're excited to get to know one of his acquaintances. You pull up the hood of your f/c (favorite color) hoodie, since your s/t (skin tone) ears are getting cold.

   You pop some earbuds into your ears and play some music as you walk to the park. Thinking a bit more about Jeff's acquaintances, you know of one in particular, because he's your mutual friend. That's how you and Jeff met, actually. 

   BEN was actually coming to kill you, but you threw something sharp at him. It stabbed him in the eye, and he had to take a break. So, the mission was given to Jeff. After about a week of fighting every night, you both just decided to stop and become friends. Hell, you became even more somehow.

   You and BEN have been friends ever since he tried to kill you. He comes through your laptop sometimes, although most of the time, he comes through your T.V. You chill together and watch movies, play video games, and just veg out until you both fall asleep. He's also been through a lot with you, every fight you and Jeff had, work and school related stress, nightmares, everything! 

   So, why are you with Jeff and not BEN? Jeff asked you out, you don't think BEN likes you. You just think BEN is your best friend. He couldn't possibly have feelings for you...right?

   BEN lays silently on his bed. He's internally kicking his own ass for not telling you about who Jeff actually was. There's a lot you don't know about Jeff. You're the type of person to wait until someone opens up to you. You don't know that when Jeff's not around you, he's an arrogant, self-centered, asswipe. 

   BEN rolls off his bed, and gets up to go get some food. He wanders into the kitchen and grabs a bowl from the cupboard. A bowl of cereal at 2 pm (14:00) sounds very tasty right about now. He takes the milk carton from the fridge and some Cheerios. 

   BEN plops himself into a chair and starts to munch on his Cheerios. Most of the other pastas and proxies are out on missions. The rest of the pastas and proxies, including BEN, have their day off today. 

   As BEN isn't paying attention and spacing out, Sally hops into the chair next to him at the table. "Hi BEN! Whatcha doin'?" "Ah!" BEN squeaks, almost spilling his cereal. BEN composes himself and glances at the small brunette next to him. "Thinking about a friend." Sally looks up at BEN in curiosity.

   "Who?" Sally tilts her head like a confused puppy. BEN takes another spoonful of Cheerios and shoves them in his mouth. "A girl I became friends with on that one mission. The girl that stabbed me in the eye." BEN explains to the young girl. "Ohhhhh, her. Yeah I remember." BEN nods and swallows the cereal he was eating. 

    Something suddenly clicks in Sally's little noggin. She grows a sly smirk and her eyes become half lidded. She sets her head in her little palm. "You like her don't you?" The young brunette teases. BEN almost spits out his cereal, his face begins to grow red. Sally keeps smiling slyly as BEN tries to explain himself.

   As soon as he gets his bearings, BEN realizes he cant explain himself. He does like you. The tingle in his chest when he's around you. The butterflies he gets when you talk to him. How sweaty his hands get when you text him. How could he have been so blind, he likes, no, loves you.

  BEN sighs and runs his hand through his greasy, blond locks. "I may or may not..." Sally giggles at BEN. "Oh come onnnnnnnnn" Sally's green eyes make contact with BEN's red ones "I know you do. I think you should tell her how you feel." BEN's face gets red and his heart drops. 

   "I can't really do that Sally." BEN states dejectedly, Sally cocks her head at his words. "Why not?" Sally prods further. "She's, Jeff's girlfriend..." Sally looks at BEN with wide eyes. "I didn't know he had a girlfriend, I didn't even think he could get one..." BEN snorts at Sally's remark as he gets up to put his bowl in the sink. 

   Suddenly, an idea pops into BEN's head. He could just tell you how Jeff acts when he's not around you. To be fair, you probably won't believe him, but has to at least try. BEN says goodbye to Sally and semi - confidently walks back into his room. He decides to wait until 5 pm (17:00) to come over. 

   You finally arrive at the park Jeff told you to go to. It is a bit far from your apartment building, but you don't care. You text Jeff to see where he wants to meet you. As you wait for is text, you wander around, admiring the scene.

   There are children running round as they're parents sit on the public benches and chat. There are people with they're dogs (on leashes, of course) and an opening to a forest area. You're getting more interested in the forest, but before you start walking towards it, you get a text back from Jeff. 

   'Meet me by the entrance of the forest'. His text is vague, but you know what he means. You silently walk over to the entrance of the forest. Jeff comes into view along with a female. She has long, almost tomato red hair, a pale complexion, and is about 5'2. She is wearing a denim jean jacket, a black tank top underneath, jeans and a pair of black Doc Martins. 

   You come closer to the pair, noticing Jeff has his arm around the girl. You falter for a minute, before shrugging it off as 'they must be good friends'. Once you get to Jeff and the girl, you notice the female's beautiful green eyes. Her eyes are piercing right through you, in almost a judgmental way. 

   You push the thought away as Jeff introduces you to the girl. Her name is Zoe, a very pretty name. "So, Jeff, what do you want to do here?" You ask innocently, Jeff smirks at you. "Well, I wanted to talk, about our relationship specifically." Your heart drops and you feel the blood drain from tour face. 

   "Oh, uh, ok! What did you want to talk about." You ask, still trying to be optimistic about this situation. Although, you have an idea of where this is going. "Well, I'm breaking up with you, for Zoe. I wanted to tell you in person." Jeff explains, as you stand there dumbly. 

   After you process what he just said, you are livid. "Wow, ok, so, you thought it would be a great idea to have me walk for about a half a mile (0.8 kilometers) just for you to break it off? And, if that wasn't enough you have to bring your girlfriend along with you?" You sneer at Jeff.

  "What the hell man? Like, it would've been better to break it off over the phone, rather than this shit being pulled." You continue, relentlessly. Jeff cuts in "babe, listen, I-" "No! You pull this shit and still have the brass balls to call me babe?! Get bent, Jeff." You finish, flipping him off as you retreat back to your apartment building. 

   As soon as you enter your apartment, you break down. You cry until you're dehydrated. After wallowing in a bundle of blankets for about an hour, you get up to check the time. It is four thirty, you sigh and get up to get some food. Food doesn't solve ALL your problems, but it does solve some of them. 

   You sigh as you stare into a fridge with only a few water bottles and some shredded cheese. You grab a water bottle, then close your fridge and trudge back to your room. You decide to order some food, but you don't know where from. 

   After about 30 minutes, BEN pops out of your T.V. and scares the shit out of your indecisive ass. "What's poppin' Y/n?" BEN asks, sitting next to you on your bed. "Nothin' much, just trying to decide on what to eat for dinner." BEN's eyes light up "CAN WE GET MCDONALD'S?!" You flinch at the sound of BEN's excitement. 

   "Pfft, yeah, we can." You open a handy dandy app on your phone that lets you order from almost any restaurant in your area. You pick out what you want and hand your phone over to BEN when you're done. You got some f/f (favorite food) and BEN got chicken nuggets. 

  "Its gonna take 45 minutes to get here." You inform, BEN groans. You chuckle at his childish nature. "You wanna play some Smash while we wait?" You ask, grabbing you and BEN a controller. "Hell yeah! Imma wipe the floor with your ass!" "Don't be so cocky BEN." You retort sassily. 

   "BRO LITERALLY HOW." BEN yells in frustration, you giggle at him. "I told you not to be so cocky~" You taunt he crosses his arms and pouts. You chuckle and ruffle his golden locks. You her a knock at your door and both you and BEN perk up. "I'll be right back, the food's here." You rise up off your semi-stiff mattress and walk out of your room. 

   BEN lets out a breath he didn't even know he was holding. He decided to tell you after about Jeff. He had noticed that you were crying. He noticed your puffy eyes, the unwiped tear streaks, your shaking. He didn't say anything because he wanted to make you feel a little bit better, but he also wants to tell you the truth. 

   You come back with a McDonald's back full of greasy, unhealthy, yet delicious food. BEN licks his lips as you hand him his chicken nuggets. You take out f/f and take a bite. Your mouth salivates even more as you take a bite of the lovely food. 

   After you two are finished, you took the trash out of your room so it won't attract ants or roaches. BEN starts sweating and his heart beats against his rib cage. "Hey, Y/n, can I talk to you about something?" He tries his best to make sure he doesn't look nervous. "Yeah, what's up?" BEN gulps and prepares for the worst.

   "Ok, I wanted to tell you Jeff isn't what he seems. He's an arrogant, asshat that doesn't care about others emotions. He thinks he's the best thing since sliced bread-" "oh yeah I know," BEN stops in his tracks. "Y-you know?" He stutters, looking at you with pure confusion on his features. "Yeah, he broke up with me for a much prettier girl, he name is Zoe, I believe." 

   BEN stares at you in disbelief, not because of the break up between you and Jeff. It's because you weren't breaking down. "A-are you doing okay?" BEN asks, placing a hand on your shoulder. "Kinda, I broke down earlier about it, but I think I'm fine now." BEN nods and scoots a bit closer to you. 

   "Ok, well, I-I wanted to ask you something. To be fair, it is a bit, sudden and early, and its okay if you don't feel the same." BEN looks at you with a cute blush spreading across his left cheek, over his button nose, to his right cheek. "What do you mean,?" You ask, cocking your head. BEN holds in a breath, and then lets it go. 

   "Y-Y/n, I came over to ask you, if y-you'd be my girlfriend." As soon as those words exit BEN's mouth, he shrinks down in fear of what you'll say. You give BEN a look of sympathy. You gently scoot closer to him, and wrap your arms around him, holding him close to your chest.

   BEN slowly un-tesnses his muscles and wraps his arms around your waist. Burying his head into your shoulder. He breathes into your shirt, your shirt smells like fresh linen laundry soap. He loves that laundry soap. You rub soothing circles on your best friend's back. "I'm so sorry BEN, I had no idea you felt this way." You whisper soothingly. BEN starts to get his hopes up. 

"I don't think I like you like that, BEN."

  BEN's heart drops immediately. He holds on to you tighter. You both sat there in a comfortable silence, BEN blaming himself for catching feelings. You know however, what he's doing.

  "BEN, hun, please don't blame yourself, I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better," you pull away from BEN's grasp, he looks you in the eyes, "we can still be friends." BEN accepts your offer and pulls you into another tight embrace. "Thank you Y/n. God, your the best friend I could ever ask for."

[goldenxsunshine]

50 questions you’ve never been asked

I was tagged by the lovely @softboylwt​, thank you darling ✨

1. what is the colour of your hairbrush? edit: so I realized I didn’t read that correctly the first time around, but I don’t usually brush my hair, tho I do have one that’s brown

2. a food you never eat? it’s not really a food but i never eat plain butter, like in cakes and all that, when it’s cooked, alright, but on bread, in sandwiches or anything else it just grosses me out to no avail!! I can’t even touch it!! Also any sea food is a no-go for me, i just can’t!!

3. are you typically too warm or too cold? i think it can depend, but in general i tend to get cold very easily

4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago? i was catching up on niall and liam’s live and feeling very emotional about it

5. what is your favourite candy bar? here we call it kinder tranche au lait, which literally translates to kinder milky slice but idk if that’s what it’s called!! Anyways, it’s the kinder that you have to keep in the fridge with the creamy white thing in the middle, i just love it!!

6. have you ever been to a professional sports event? Nope never, i don’t really care much for any sports tbh afdhkj

7. what is the last thing you said out loud? “good night” to my little sister about five seconds ago

8. what is your favourite ice cream? salted caramel!!!!!! it’s my LIFE

9. what was the last thing you had to drink? water

10. do you like your wallet? I do actually!! I had another pink one that was too big but i received a small dark blue one for my birthday that’s just perfect

11. what was the last thing you ate? something very very VERY good!! it was a polish recipe: tomato soup with some homemade kluski (some sort of pasta i guess you could say) and basil

12. did you buy any new clothes last weekend? nope

13. the last sporting event you watched? as i said before i really don’t care much for any sports so i think the answer is none, if i did watch one well it was so long ago that i forgot afskdly

14. what is your favourite flavour of popcorn? sweet popcorn OR those with some chocolate you can buy, both are equally good

15. who is the last person you sent a text message to? well technically the last message i sent was on here to, but if we mean irl texting then an old friend of mine

16. ever go camping? nope not really, i went a couple times when i was younger with some friends but not anymore

17. do you take vitamins? nooe i don’t, but i should

18. do you go to church every sunday? nope

19. do you have a tan? as of right now, only the beginning of one on my back

20. do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? oof tough one, but im gonna have to go with pizza!! I actually had some today

21. do you drink your soda with a straw? nope not anymore

22. what colour socks do you usually wear? small white ones, sometimes black

23. do you ever drive above the speed limit? wellll since i still haven’t got my driver’s licence i can assure you that i’ve never once driven above the speed limit in my life 😌

24. what terrifies you? loneliness

25. look to your left, what do you see? i can see my bedroom door as well as my cupboard and the front door a bit further

26. what chore do you hate? washing the toilets

27. what do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?  i have no idea tbh ajdsfkds 5sos maybe

28. what’s your favourite soda? i actually don’t really drink any sodas, but if i had to get one i’d say sprite or lemon iced tea

29. do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? i don’t think we have any drive-through here, or if there are i’ve never been, so i’m gonna say fast food place

30. who’s the last person you talked to? my little sister

31. favourite cut of beef? i have no fucking clue, i only eat beef when i eat burgers so that one i guess jsdkajl

32. last song you listened to? some song off a random sport playlist i listend to when i was working out earlier, it’s called hometown apparently

33. last book you read? if we’re talking last book i read through but haven’t actually finished yet, it’s une bête au paradis (a beast in paradise)

34. favourite day of the week? i don’t really have one tbh, i just know it’s not monday nor sunday

35. can you say the alphabet backwards? yes i can actually ajkdjfld, well i need to say it thorugh once in order (mentally is enough) but yeah i can

36. how do you like your coffee? i absolutely despise coffee, in any form

37. favourite pair of shoes? a pair of shoes that i found in italy a few years ago, but i just can’t describe them asjdhfk they have too many things idk how to say in english

38. at what time do you normally go to bed? i’d say usually it’s around 11pm or midnight, but lately it’s been more like 1 or 2 am

39. at what time do you normally get up? again usually would depend on my classes, but lately it’s between 8 am and 10 am

40. what do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? i literally cannot choose one!! boht can be so magical, but maybe i’ll go with sunset cause i’m almost never up for sunrise ajdfkjl

41. how many blankets are on your bed? only one

42. describe your kitchen plates? i still live wiht my parents so they’re just plain white, but modern-ish 

43. do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? i don’t really have one, but the only alcohol i can enjoy drinking is vodka so anything with that i guess

44. do you play cards? ugh way too much, or well not anymore, but when i was in high school it was literally all my friends’ favourite thing to do and tbh i just don’t really like them

45. what colour is your car? again i don’t have a driving’s licence adjfhk

46. can you change a tire? there are too many questions concerning driving in this jadshkj, nope or well never tried, who knows maybe i have a secret talent

47. what is your favourite state/province? i haven’t been in the US, or well i went when i was much younger so i don’t remember!! But i’ll pick a country and say tulum, Mexico!! i went there once a few years ago and it was just magical

48. favourite job you’ve ever had? i haven’t had a lot of experience in real jobs i guess, but one of my favourite closest to a job thing was the internship i started right before this whole mess in something called psychopédagogie (i haven’t got a clue what it might be in english im sorry)

49. how did you get your biggest scar? i don’t have many scars and the few i have are pretty small, but i guess the “biggest” would be on my foot, i was at a friend’s for the summer and we were going around in quads, then there was a little slope and my dumbass panicked and pushed the accelerator instead of the brake and well....we bumped into a littel tree and yeah adfjhkjs

50. what did you do today that made someone else happy? i haven’t done much today i don’t think, but maybe helping to make dinner ? idk

I apologize in advance if you’ve already done this, but i’m tagging: @essercipertuttienonperse, @rosegoldeyelids, @ltpolari, @watermelonsugarhii, @bigsparrowharry, @herefortommo, @arouiis, @farmjpg and @strawberryhabit

[keichanz]

For the fictional kiss prompt, can you do "17. height difference kisses where one person has to bend down and the other is on their tippy toes", for InuKag? Thank you!

“Hey Short Round, you need a little help there?”

The male voice - god, she could hear the stupid smirk in it - came from behind her and Kagome felt her eyebrow twitch both from the hated nickname and the not so subtle slight to her height. Scowling, Kagome lowered herself back down from her toes and spun around, crossing her arms as she pegged her roommate’s boyfriend’s best friend with hard glare. That damn smirk widened and amber eyes glinted wickedly at her, irritating her even more with his stupidly roguish good looks.

Inuyasha Taisho was 230 pounds of pure hard muscle, sexy as hell, cocky attitude, and the most infuriating of all, a whole head taller than her at 6′2. He constantly teased her about her height and he never passed up an opportunity to rub it in her face and he - and pretty much everyone else - was taller than her. True, she was shorter than the average woman and definitely wouldn’t be winning any contents in that particular department, but she didn’t really care, either. She liked her body. Okay, sure, maybe she could stand to lose a few pounds, but she was perfectly healthy and happy and that’s what truly mattered.

And besides. She wasn’t short, she was fun-sized.

“Har-dee-har, Sasquatch,” Kagome fired back, using her own little pet name that she knew he disliked. “Haven’t heard that one before. Since you’re here, why don’t you make yourself useful for a change and get my mug that I know you purposely put up there just to piss me off.”

It was one of his favorite things to do; put her belongings in hard to reach places where he knew she wouldn’t be able to get without assistance or climbing up onto something. One time she’d ended up searching for two hours for her phone only for the stupid jerk to waltz in, ask her what she was looking for with that infuriating smirk, and then jump up and get it off the fucking ceiling fan.

For revenge she’d cut holes in the crotch of all of his boxers and miraculously since then her things had stopped disappearing so frequently. 

Surprisingly he didn’t react to her nickname for him and merely cocked a brow at her before slowly lifting his gaze to the top shelf of the open cupboard behind her. He knew which mug she was talking about because she was right; he had put it there, so he didn’t bother to deny her accusation. And though he hated it when she called him Sasquatch - only because he knew it was a barb at how tall he was and not his half-demon heritage - this time he ignored it because he’d put that mug there for a very specific reason, one that he’d been dying to do for a very long time now.

Kagome Higurashi was a little spitfire, a whole lotta fiery attitude, sharp tongue, witty remarks, and sassy wit all packed into her slender 5′3 frame and she was absolutely fucking drop dead gorgeous. With wavy hair black as a raven’s wing that fell down her back in a silken waterfall, big blue eyes that reminded him of the ocean and killer legs that he dreamed about being wrapped around his waist, Inuyasha had wanted her since the day Miroku’s girlfriend had introduced them to each other one year ago and their friendship, or lack thereof, was less than stellar.

Hopefully today he could change that and their tentative not-friendship would become a maybe-solid relationship.

“Hello? Earth to Taisho? Would you stop standing there and help me, please?”

Inuyasha snapped his gaze back down to hers, studied her for a silent minute - loving the way she huffed and pouted at him - before wordlessly closing the distance between them and standing right in front of her. Predictably Kagome tried to back up to put some space between them, but couldn’t go far with the counter at her back and she flushed when she realized she couldn’t escape. 

Actually, she could, but secretly she didn’t really want to so she just stared up at him with wide eyes and will her heart to remain calm.

Inuyasha smirked again and without even looking, keeping his eyes on hers, he reached up and easily snatched the desired mug from the top shelf, bringing it down and presenting to her with a raised eyebrow.

Glaring at him, Kagome clenched her jaw and went to snatch it from his hand but was not expecting him to suddenly jerk it up and away from her grasp, holding it above her head where she couldn’t reach it. Her mouth dropped open but then her face contorted into another scowl as she jumped up, swiping at her mug. Again he lifted it higher, just out of her reach and she released an aggravated grunt.

“Dammit, Taisho, knock it off!” she snapped and bounced again. He laughed and dangled it over her head, always jerking it away at the last second. “Give me my mug you asshole!”

Unthinkingly she placed her hand on his shoulder as leverage when she jumped up in another attempt. Again he held it away and she contemplated the appealing act of kneeing him in the balls. That would get him to bend over and she could get her mug back.

Growling impressively well for a human, Kagome huffed and glowered at him, her eyes twin slits of blue fire. “Stop being such a child, you jerk. Give. Me. My. Mug.”

He grinned. “What do I get out of it?”

"The ability to father children someday. Gimme.”

Inuyasha snorted but did put some space between them. Just in case. 

“Not good enough,” he drawled, spinning the mug around in his finger by the handle. Kagome made a distressed sound, clearly worried it would fly of his finger and shatter. Inuyasha grinned and put his plan into action.

“Do something for me and I’ll give it back.” Amber eyes bore into her own and he was gratified at the blush that stole across her cheeks. He’d always known his attraction wasn’t one sided, but it was always nice to see little reminders.

Despite feeling suddenly hot and the quickened beat of her heart, Kagome rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “Do you realize how childish you sound?”

“Yes or no.” He wasn’t about to her distract him from his goal with one of their petty arguments.

Kagome frowned and eyed him strangely for a minute before giving in with a sigh. “Fine, whatever. What do you want me to do? And it better not be something ridiculous like--”

“Kiss me.”

Kagome froze. Stared at him with impossibly wide eyes, mouth dropping incredulously as her flush darkened to rival that of a tomato. Her heart thundered in her chest and her stomach started doing little flip-flops, not at all unpleasant.

“Wh...what did you say?” she whispered, sure she must have heard that wrong, postive he really didn’t say--

“I said,” Inuyasha rumbled, eyes going to half-mast, “kiss me.”

Kagome’s lips trembled and before she could stop herself her gaze dropped to his mouth. The growl that erupted from his chest elicited a gasp from her and she quickly darted her eyes back to his face, where shocked blue met with dark honey. She was speechless, jaw working but no sound coming out, heart pounding, blood racing, and a pleasant warmth steadily spreading throughout her body from the thought of kissing him, something she’d wanted to do for...a very long time now.

She should have said no. She should have told him how ridiculous he was being, should have been smart and simply walked away from his ultimatum. 

Instead she took a step closer to him and tilted her head back while raising up onto her toes. Inuyasha watched her, saying nothing as she tentatively lifted shaking hands and rested him on his shoulders. As if pulled by an invisible force, Inuyasha bent down to make it easier for her, feeling the warmth of her breath fan over his lips, making the breath hitch in his throat.

Kagome swallowed once, licked her lips, and achingly slowly, she pressed her lips to his in the sweetest, softest kiss Inuyasha had eve had the pleasure to experience before. 

Her eyes fluttered close, so did his and with a sigh Inuyasha kissed her back, his free hand lifting to brush his fingers along her jaw before sliding his hand into her hair, tangling in her dark hair as he deepened the connection. Kagome gasped and he slicked his tongue along her bottom lip before stealing into her mouth for taste. Her whimper was drowned out by his pleased grow and suddenly Inuyasha was backing her up, carelessly tossing the mug still in his hand onto the counter before grasping her hips and lifting her up onto the counter. He wedged himself between her legs and tilted her head back while his other hand wrapped possessively around her thigh.

Slim arms wrapped around his neck and with a heady groan Inuyasha finally kissed her the way he wanted to, hard, demanding presses of his lips against her own and greedily swallowing all the delectable little sounds she made. Kagome returned his passion with her own, fingers running through his hair while she arched against him, teeth nibbling his lip, tongue slicking against his own and driving him absolutely fucking crazy. 

After several more heated kisses were exchanged, Inuyasha finally pulled back and rested his forehead against her own, panting as he stared into blue eyes glazed over with lust he was sure reflected in his own.

“You’re still short,” he rumbled and kissed her again, teeth nibbling her lip.

“And you’re still a jerk,” Kagome returned breathlessly and nipped his jaw. 

“Shut up and kiss me,” Inuyasha growled and promptly stole that impish little smile for his own, covering her mouth with his and making her forget about everything but him.

[writemywaytoyourheart]

One → Two

a/n: guess who finally got a laptop mofos? when I say that this fic has given me grief.....I am in no way exaggerating,,,, but, the past is behind us! let’s just enjoy it now 😅 pls...I seriously hope y’all like this. technically it’s still Friday for some people ;) and I promise that the story will get better as we go along.

Pairing: Hoseok x Female Reader

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings for this chapter: Mentions of alcohol consumption, a creeper dude, emotional abuse, insinuations of past sexual abuse, insinuations of self harm, language.

Word count: 3.7k

Trigger Warning: if you are easily triggered by this type of stuff, pls don't read it. I have some fluff on my account, you should enjoy that instead! Here's a link to my other works �� BTS ML

Tag list: @melikeylikeyjimin

If you wanna be on the tag list, send me an ask or dm :)

Daisies in the Dark Masterlist

All stories have a beginning and all stories have an end.

But, how does one know where to start a story? And maybe, sometimes we don't want to know the end; since unfortunately, not all stories have a good finish. Perhaps we'd like to leave it unfinished and rewrite it in our minds, because all humans want a happy ending.

You're still reading so I guess you'd like to see for yourself how this story goes.

Have you ever heard the story of how the sun fell in love with the moon?

No?

Well, you're about to...

And I can't promise you that it's going to go the way you'd like.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

3 yrs before the incident

One more chance. I'll give her one more chance, you thought as you grit your teeth, watching your once best friend in the lunch line chatting it up with the annoying girl from history class.

Your breath caught in your throat when your former bff Lena made eye contact with you from across the cafeteria after filling her lunch tray. A small smile went to find it's way onto your face when Lena's eye contact lingered, but it was gone in a matter of seconds when she just twitched an eyebrow and sauntered off to sit at a table across the room; the conversation between Lena and her new bestie continuing as if nothing had happened.

So it was true, she'd left you for someone else. Like you were worth nothing more to that girl than a tissue; use it once and throw it away. Not a very good comparison at the time, but that's all you could think of as you watched them sit down; you were worth no more than a small used tissue.

Figures...

Your hands started to twitch awkwardly not knowing what to do with themselves now and you stared at the lasagna on your lunch tray; if you could even call it that–all it was was a lump of overcooked noodles drenched in sauce the color of a burnt tomato with who knows what posing as the ground beef, covered in a crispy layer of cheese.

You definitely weren't hungry, but staring at the sad excuse for lunch in front of you and contemplating life as nothing more than a wisp of a tissue floating through the air, not knowing where it might end up–was better than watching Lena start a new chapter without you.

It didn't make sense, you were best friends...weren't you? Guess it didn't matter now, since a friendship takes two people to make it work, and seeing as one was currently occupied elsewhere, you would have to make do with what you had, which was...a depressed piece of lasagna staring at you from it's home on the untouched tray. You poked at it with your fork and looked at it-thinking. Then you whispered to the disheartening meal,

"Oh well...at least you're not gonna leave me for that annoying- what was her name? I don't even know, but who cares, right?"

Then you suddenly realized what you were doing and looked up quickly in embarrassment, afraid someone had seen you. But the regular drone of kids talking, shouting and laughing was the same as always. Of course no one had noticed, because you were invisible.

And you were talking to a piece of lasagna.

Highschool was great....

You were a senior this year, at seventeen. At least this was the last year of hell, then you could do whatever you wanted. You had a lot of things you wanted to do and places to travel to, maybe you couldn't do them all but you'd be damned if you didn't at least try.

But one thing was for sure, you couldn't just sit there and stare at that fake lasagna pretending like Lena wasn't betraying you right across the room. So you got up and brought your uneaten food to the window where kids leave their empty lunch trays and put your tray down, but kept the small carton of chocolate milk. Then headed out of the cafeteria to spend the rest of your lunchbreak in the library. You fiddled with the unopened milk carton and mumbled to yourself while you walked,

"It's fine, I don't need her anyway."

Just numb the pain.

That wasn't the first or the last time.

-

-

2 yrs before the incident

"Uhhh, ya know what little missy? I think if you give me twenty-five percent off everything, maybe we could come to a compromise?"

This man......was going to die in a minute if he kept going on like this.

You tried your hardest not to just scream at this pervert to leave and say you wouldn't do a damn thing for him. You just settled for licking your dry lips while he started to smirk at you. He brought his hand up to rest against the counter, then started to slowly tap his fingers. You made eye contact with him and said sternly, "I'm sorry sir, but I can't do that."

"What if I give you my phone number? And we'll make it fifteen percent..." He tried again, not once breaking eye contact with you.

"Excuse me sir-"

"Yes, doll?"

"Do you have a coupon?"

"No, I don't bu-"

"Then no, we can't move the price down at all, would you like to pay the full price or leave sir?" You stared him dead in the eyes, this creep, you thought angrily, how dare he call me that? I hope he just leaves, I don't care if he doesn't buy anything. The man leaned over the cash register, "hmm, this isn't very good customer service. Maybe I won't come back." Please don't, you thought, but instead of saying that you settled for, "it's not about customer service, this is store policy, I'm sorry sir but I can't do anything."

"Ya know what? I like it when you call me sir- you say that a lot to me....what's a pretty little lady like you doing working in a rundown grocery store, hm? What about college? You're what, eighteen? If you'd like, I can give you my number and you won't have to worry about this job, I'll take care of you." He smirked and arched an eyebrow at you from the other side of the counter.

It was probably a good thing there was a big cash register between the two of you, since you weren't sure what would've happened if you had free range. By now your brain was just blurry and you saw nothing but blackness because of the fury settling inside. What a disgusting man. You didn't care if you got fired, you were gonna teach him a lesson or two about trying to get young girls to do stuff for him in exchange for money. You leaned forward which made him lean back in surprise, then you said loud enough for the other people in line to hear,

"If you do not pay the full price right here right now, then leave. If you think I'm looking for a sugar daddy then you are sadly mistaken. You have enough money to pay for a girl's life in exchange for your own personal services, so you have enough to pay the full thirty five dollars. There are people waiting behind you so make up your mind now, sir." You said the last word mockingly and raised an eyebrow at him in defiance. The man's eyes grew in shock, then he glared at you but he didn't say a word as he threw forty bucks in your direction, grabbed his bags and stomped out of the store.

You took a deep breath and smiled at the next customer who cautiously came forward with their items.

-

The second you stepped through the door after working a twelve hour shift you slumped against the wall and yanked your sneakers off; dropping them to the floor carelessly. The apartment was dark so you assumed your mom wasn't home- probably out drinking away her troubles again. Walking into the kitchen, you sighed at the sink full of dirty dishes, and the counters that were no better. The smell wasn't too bad, probably because your nose was used to it by now. You walked to a cupboard and rummaged around until you found a sleeve of saltine crackers. After that you grabbed the softened butter and a knife and walked to your room; stepping over and around the miscellaneous junk spread throughout the apartment.

After about an hour of sitting on your bed, scrolling through your phone and munching on what your dinner was that night, you heard the door open and what you could only assume was your mother stumble inside. Your mother's heels clacked against the hard floor by the door, then a heavier pair of footsteps could be heard with them. You sighed deeply, but stayed as quiet as you could. Not again, you thought miserably. Just, please just go do whatever you're gonna do and leave me alone, you prayed silently squeezing your eyes shut.

There was a lot of stumbling and cursing and your chest was tight with anxiety, scared that at any moment they would drunkenly come into your room by accident. Eventually, your mother's bedroom door slammed shut and you let out the breath you had been holding. Thank you God, thank you, you clasped your hands and shook them, then carefully and as quietly as you could, you set the remaining crackers and butter on your nightstand. Then you shifted in bed to lie on your left side and tried to make sure the bed didn't creak at your movements– cringing a little when it squeaked a bit. It was gonna be alright, he–whoever he was, didn't know you were in the house.

You closed your eyes and tried to ignore the lingering feeling on your skin, even though it had been over a year since the last time. You stuffed your hands over your ears, willing yourself to sleep despite whatever was going on on the other side of the wall.

-

Morning came all too soon, and with it a massive pounding headache from the lack of sleep. You groaned when the sun hit your eyes and made the darkness an annoying shade of orangey red from behind your eyelids, your brain in a fog from the tiny bit of sleep you were able to get even though it was plagued by nightmares. Then you suddenly snapped awake and shot up in bed, grabbing your chest and feeling all around yourself frantically, breathing a sigh of relief when you felt your shirt still on your body. You were okay, it was just another nightmare. You tried to steady your breathing while taking deep breaths in and blowing them out slowly. Then you looked towards the door and cupped a hand by your ear; listening intently. After a minute or two of silence that didn't really prove anything, you sighed and swung your legs out of bed- planting your feet on the floor despite laundry being scattered everywhere. Sneaking towards the door you put an ear to it then slowly turned the knob. Normally you wouldn't even be risking going out of the safety of your room but you really had to pee, you would just have to be quick.

You scurried quietly to the bathroom and when you were finished you were on your way back when your mom's door swung open. You flinched and wrung your hands keeping your eyes downcast, too afraid to look up. But then you sighed in relief when it was only your mother that pushed past you to go to the bathroom. You decided to risk it and peeked into your mom's bedroom. A weight lifted off your chest at the sight of the empty bed–he must have left earlier.

-

"Aren't you supposed to be working or something? Why're you just sitting around reading?" Your mother scoffed at you from the doorway, after slamming your bedroom door open to confront you.

You set your book down–not ready for another fight, "they gave me today off, I'm back on the schedule tomorrow." Your mother just glared at you and crossed her arms, "oh, so you think we can afford to have you lying around, taking days off? Lazy ass." With that she turned and slammed the door shut, leaving you to sit there and scold your heart to stop hurting, because it just wasn't worth it.

You don't need her Y/n...

Just numb the pain.

So that's what you did.

-

-

1 1/2 yrs before the incident

You walked into the apartment after three classes in a row; each one being about two hours long. You dropped your backpack by the door with a thud then changed your mind and picked it up again, not wanting another fight when someone tripped over it in their drunken state. You decided just putting it in your room would be best. 

Canned vegetables with canned chicken really wasn't too bad if one could figure out the right stuff to put in it. After years of this, you had discovered your favorite seasonings and you were mixing yourself up a nice concoction for lunch before going to work, humming and talking to yourself as you did so–when there was loud pounding on the front door.

You weren't very alarmed, knowing exactly who it was, and so you opened the door and stepped aside as your mother staggered in, thankfully alone. Turning to look at you, your mother's eyes were a bit glassy as she spoke, "is there any food around here or do I have to do all the work for that too?" She wasn't drunk, but she wasn't too far away from it. You didn't say anything and just walked to the kitchen, took your lunch and handed it to your mother.

"I just made this for you, thought you'd be home soon."

Your mom just snatched it away and walked to her room calling over her shoulder, "almost nineteen years old and all you can do is make a half-assed meal for the woman that gave up everything for your lazy ass."

You just grabbed your bag and put your shoes on, trying to ignore the insistent hunger pangs in your stomach, then walked out the door for work.

-

"Y/n? May I speak with you please?" It was the next day and you were just leaving the history classroom when your professor called you over. Your grades were far from satisfactory, but you really did try. You walked over to Professor Kim's (who also happened to teach your Korean class as well) desk and tried not to hang your head, since you knew what was coming. She was a nice lady, but could also be strict at times.

"Y/n, I'm going to get straight to the point. I heard that you wanted to travel to South Korea. We both know you're struggling a bit in the academic department, but I know you're a good girl, and you speak Korean pretty well."

You looked up, utterly confused, this wasn't about you almost failing history class? Professor Kim just smiled and continued, "there is a scholarship program to go and stay in Seoul for a year, learning Korean and going to the university there. I thought you might be interested in it."

You were so shocked you couldn't speak for a full minute, just stuttering out nonsense until Professor Kim laughed and put her hand on your shoulder. Then she handed you a packet, telling you to fill it out and give it back to her as soon as possible.

This couldn't be happening. Good things didn't happen to you. Could this actually be your escape?

You thanked Professor Kim over and over then scurried out of the room before anything else could be said and possibly destroy this amazing opportunity. As you left there was a new lift to your step.

-

Two weeks had passed and no word from the scholarship people. You turned nineteen in those two weeks, but that didn't mean much to you. All you could think about was the scholarship. Things at home didn't change, they never did. Until one day when you were heading home from work, completely exhausted, and you saw the mailman at the front door knocking. You ran up the steps but your mother opened the door right when you got there. You said hello to the man and took the mail from him, being our to thank him. When you turned to go inside, your mother snatched all the mail from you and stalked off. You followed her cautiously, "uh, may I see that? I think I might have gotten something." Your mother turned and glared at you then spat, "and what could you have gotten in the mail? You don't even have friends, and the bills are in my name." You tried not to roll your eyes, even though the bills were in your mother's name, she wasn't the one paying them.

Scanning through the envelopes, your mother stopped when she saw one with the name Y/n Y/l/n on the front. She turned and looked at you accusingly, "what is this?" Before you had time to even process what you were doing you snatched the envelope out of her hands and dashed around her, running to your room. You shut the door and locked it, hearing the woman outside screaming horrible accusations and threats at you but not caring a single bit. The envelope was white–super white actually, almost looking unnatural. Your fingers shook as you gently tore it open, running a finger carefully along the top so you could pull the letter out. The paper inside was just as bright, and the bold black lettering stood out.

Your breathing hitched, was this actually happening? A second scan over the letter and a quick yet painful pinch to the arm confirmed that, yes, this was actually happening. Your hands trembled as you slowly pulled your phone out of your pocket and carefully typed in the number printed on the paper. The sounds of your mother screaming outside the door and hitting it, the cars outside, your own heart pounding in your ears- it all faded away to a dull thudding when you heared the ringing through the phone, once, twice, you held your breath, three rings in, four......click

"Hello? This is Jill Dunning, how can I help you?"

"H-hello? I- I was told to call you."

"Are you Y/n Y/l/n, by any chance?"

You cleared your throat nervously, then took a deep breath before answering.

"Yes, I am."

-

1 month later 

The flight there was extremely long and tiring so by the time you were getting off; you could’ve cried tears of joy, having felt like the plane ride really was going to last forever and you’d never step on solid ground again. But there you were; standing in the middle of the Seoul airport, completely and utterly free.

Not to mention, completely and utterly lost.

You looked around but couldn’t see anything other than a lot of people rushing around; businessmen and women, families with little children that stared at you with wide eyes, college students; and yet not a single soul that looked like they might help you find who you were looking for. You shifted your heavy backpack and decided to walk a bit, maybe you could find where the luggage came through and you could at least collect the rest of your bags. After you walked for another minute you saw a sign with a suitcase on it, hanging from the ceiling with an arrow pointing down. You hurried over to where it was pointing and saw a giant metal thing with suitcases going around on it, people looking at tags and grabbing them before hurrying off again. 

You walked over briskly and just in time too, because your two suitcases had just come around the bend in the giant machine. You double checked the tags and after confirming they were yours, you heaved them off the machine and caught your breath after setting them next to you. Then you had to figure out where you were and where your roommate, who was to be picking you up, was. You went to the name of your roommate in your contacts and pressed it before you held your phone to your ear. After one ring, the sweet voice of your roommate answered in Korean.

“Hello? Y/n?”

“Hey Eui, I just got here and I’m so lost. I just got my bags.”

“I’m so sorry Y/n! I’ll be there in less than five minutes. Traffic was awful, but I’m walking into the airport now. Just stay by the baggage area, ok?”

”Ok, thanks Eui.”

You had talked to her on the phone many times over the past four weeks and you really liked her, you couldn’t wait to meet in person. You hung up and looked around, watching everyone else go about their days; rushing to catch flights, leisurely browsing the shops in the airport, then you heard an excited squeal and turned to see a girl running and jumping into the arms of a boy who you assumed was her boyfriend. You just smiled and kept looking around- trying not to think about how badly you wished that was you.

“Y/n?”

You turned at the sound of Eui’s voice and smiled widely when she approached you with open arms. Eui wrapped her arms around you and then pulled away, still smiling, “welcome to Seoul, are you ready to start over?” That had to be the best sentence you ever heard in your life. You smiled back at her and grabbed one of your suitcases while Eui grabbed the other one.

“Definitely.”

And you were; a new place, a new school, a friendly face, and no people from your past. It was time to start over and let things go, because life just got a whole lot easier.

You had no idea that whether you liked it or not, your past would continue to haunt you, no matter how many miles away you ran.

“Let’s go.”

Preview → Next

[blkmxrvel]

Haven’t Forgotten My Way Home [10] - (CONVERTED)

Pairing: Kara Zor-El x Female!Reader

Summary: In the D/s society of National City, men and women abandoned by their Dom/mes or otherwise deemed unfit for life “outside” end up at the Mount Overland House for Orphaned Submissives. It is here that Kara Zor-El finds Y/N Hastings, broken and fearful from mistreatment at the hands of her former Dom. Can Kara coax Y/N back into the world that once so terrified her, and show her the true meaning of care and submission?

Warnings: Domestic Violence (Flashbacks, Mentions and Descriptions), Misogyny, Domination/Submission.

A/N: This is really one of my favorite stories. I’ve it so many different times in so many different fandoms and wanted to put it in another one! In this, Kara and Alex are not sisters, Kara isn’t an alien which means she isn’t supergirl. Just wanna give another note that this story is NOT mine. I did not come with the plot, I just switched out the names of characters and places, that is all. Credit goes to itsfaberrytaboo on Ao3!

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

“Five p.m., turn on the oven. Five-ten get everything out of the cupboard. Don’t burn anything. Five-fifteen prepare everything; five-thirty put the pan in the oven, set the timer. Watch the timer. Please don’t burn, please don’t burn… six p.m. take out the pan. Six-fifteen…”

She was talking to herself. Had she gone insane already?

Y/N sat on the unfamiliar bed and glanced at the darkened television in the guest room. Should she watch tv? She picked up the remote from the cluttered bedside table and turned it over in her hands, staring down at it. She didn’t know what she could watch. Real Bratty Subs of New Jersey didn’t come on until ten, and besides, she didn’t want to watch it without Miss Kara… She didn’t really like it, but she’d never tell Miss Kara that.

She glanced at the clock again. 5:12. Her hands trembled.

“How do I know what to do, if someone doesn’t… tell me what to do?”

Y/N’s days… before, had been regimented with almost-military precision. There were two lists, broad pieces of paper hung up in the living room. Her day and evening routines. They were instructed down to the minute, each second of every day filled with the things she needed to do in order to keep him happy. Sir- His favorite thing to do when Y/N missed a detail was to lean her against the wall, her nose pressed to the papers as he whipped her, until the black scrawl that was his handwriting faded into illegibility with her tears.

“You’ll learn if I have to beat it into you for the rest of your life.”

She lived every day of that life terrified that she would, once again, get something wrong.

And she usually did.

But even with that fear, there was comfort. She could breathe a little easy, when he wasn’t there. She knew what was expected of her, even when she was alone. Because she knew how he wanted things – the lists told her. She knew what she had to do, what foods to prepare, how to fold the clothes, how to make the bed, how to clean the bathroom. She knew that every day at 6:15, the front door would open and he would walk in. Sometimes with a grin, which would give her some relief even as she wondered what that grin meant. Other times with a scowl, and she’d begin the mental preparations for the punishment that she knew was coming.

There was no comfort in being by herself now. At Miss Kara’s house, she hadn’t been alone, because Miss Kara had taken that week off from work. She had vacation time, she’d said when Y/N protested. And then she’d praised Y/N for protesting, which was just… strange. But Miss Kara had been home, and Y/N knew what to expect. Coffee was always brewing by 9:30, and lunch was at 12:10. The television nearly always was flipped on by 8:45 and cuddles…

Well, cuddles had happened once, at exactly 8:57. Lazily, really, without Y/N even realizing she’d inched closer to Miss Kara, and Miss Kara’s arm had wrapped around her shoulders during a commercial break. It was only just before they went to bed (11:22) that they both noticed Y/N’s arms were around Kara’s waist and Kara was rocking her, ever so slightly. That was when Y/N decided that Miss Kara was really cute when she blushed.

Even if she knew what to expect at Miss Kara’s, Y/N also knew that the schedule was flexible. It didn’t matter if she overslept a few minutes, because Miss Kara didn’t get mad. It was okay if lunch was late and didn’t happen until 12:45 because she and Miss Kara had been talking. It was all right because Miss Kara had been there.

Here, though… Nia was back at the House. She’d helped Y/N get settled in a little, showing her where her room would be and the adjoining bathroom, where the kitchen was and how to find everything she would need. But then she’d had to go back to contend with an unruly patient, and now…

Now Y/N was alone. She toyed with the remote in her hand and set it back on the table. Nia’s house was small, nowhere near as big as Miss Kara’s, or even Y/N’s hou- his house. Y/N Hastings-Olsen had lived in a little white house at the end of Russell Street. She’d thought it rather ironic, that name, almost as if it was a sign, or maybe a warning. She should have known. But she’d been sixteen and hopeful, had never been out of her parents’ home, so the little house with the six steps leading up to the front door had seemed like an adventure, a new world full of excitement and maybe, if she was lucky, love.

Her new room at Nia’s was nice, if simple. She missed the light purple of her room at Miss Kara’s, but the blue here was quiet, comforting. There were a lot of things scattered about the room; no books, but little figures and sculptures here and there that looked as if they’d been collected from a lot of different places. It didn’t serve to make the room “homey,” but maybe that was just because there was nothing of hers in it yet. Not that she had much… Y/N looked at her suitcase, still resting at the foot of the bed. She hesitated, then stood up and grabbed it, putting it on the bed and opening it with a deep breath. She lifted the lid, and her hand flew to her mouth.

The teddy bear stared up at her with brown eyes, a green ribbon tied in a bow around his neck. Y/N picked him up and hugged him to her, burying her face in his fur. If she breathed deep enough, she thought she could smell Miss Kara. She smiled a little and placed him on the bed up against the pillows, with a pat to his head.

One by one she hung her dresses in the closet, pausing to step back and realize how bare it was. Maybe she needed to go shopping for more… but the thought of going out in public by herself had her shivering and she had to sit back down to relax herself. Plus, she was supposed to use the little money the government had provided her after leaving the House to establish herself, not to buy things she didn’t really need, and she wasn’t going to ask Miss Kara for more money. Could she get a job? Y/N tilted her head, considering. Sir- James had said that no submissive of his was going to get a job, which was interesting, because he was constantly complaining about not having enough money. But she knew his real reasons, since he’d said that no way was he going to let her out in public to cheat on him.

But how would she even find a job, Y/N wondered. What did a person who didn’t have any money… do? Did they fill out applications? Talk to people? She pulled the books Miss Kara had bought her – and the Broadway ones – out of her suitcase and set them on one of the shelves of the bedside table. She didn’t even know how to get a job, she thought, tears rushing to her eyes. She didn’t know how to go outside.

She didn’t know how to do anything. Except serve. And now that was gone.

Her fingers fell onto a plastic package at the bottom of her suitcase, and Y/N furrowed her brow. Pulling it out, she smiled again and blinked back the tears that were still threatening to spill over. Mango body wash and shampoo. Miss Kara must have snuck and bought it while they were out, then packed it for her. A warm feeling settled in Y/N’s chest as she slowly walked into the bathroom and placed the things on the shelf.

Her stomach growled as Y/N closed the now-empty suitcase and stowed it away in the closet. She hadn’t had anything since lunch, but would it be all right for her to eat something? She glanced toward the clock. 5:31. Maybe she should wait for Nia… But she felt lightheaded, dizzy, a feeling that was scary and oddly comforting at the same time. She was used to it, on days when she wasn’t allowed to eat before dinner. But now… Y/N tilted her head.

Now she could eat whenever she wanted.

She made her way to the kitchen, feeling the strain because she still wasn’t as good at walking as she’d like. But Y/N had physical therapy again tomorrow; maybe Miss Kara would be there? She hoped so. Miss Kara had been crying when she’d left; Y/N could tell even though she was good at hiding it, or so she thought. It made Y/N want to grab Miss Kara and hold her, tell her everything would be okay… but as she peeked into the refrigerator, Y/N wasn’t sure if it was going to be okay.

There was bacon. That made Y/N a little happier, as did the head of lettuce in the refrigerator, and the fresh tomatoes sitting on the counter next to a loaf of bread. She hadn’t had a BLT sandwich since… before her grandpa died. He always made the best ones: crisp bacon and fresh vegetables with a dash of salt and pepper, on fluffy white bread. No mayo, and never toasted. Y/N hated toasted bread for sandwiches, but that was the way he had liked them.

Her hand hovered on its way to the cabinet to get a pan, as Y/N suddenly realized… she’d never have to toast bread again if she didn’t want to.

She’d just finished plating up her food and was moving to the living room when she heard the sound of a key in the lock. That old apprehension rose in Y/N and she had to fight the urge to drop her plate and drop to her knees with her head down, waiting. But it wasn’t James coming in the door; it was Nia Nal, red-faced and breathless from dealing with the resident.

“Hey,” she greeted Y/N with a smile. “It smells good in here, what’re you eating?”

“A s-sandwich,” Y/N said, almost apologetically. “I can make you one?” Her look was hopeful, almost pleading.

Nia shook her head, her sympathetic expression making it clear that she knew what Y/N was doing. “Nah, I can do it. I only like bacon for breakfast anyway.”

“Oh.” Y/N fell silent then, a little disappointed, and picked at her sandwich. It would’ve been so easy just to go back to the kitchen and—

“Got something for you,” Nia said, interrupting her thoughts. Y/N looked up to see her holding out a cellphone. “Kara dropped it off a few minutes ago.”

Y/N’s eyes widened as she took the cell phone in her hand and looked at it. “Miss Kara?” she said. “But why didn’t she come see me…”

“I think you know why,” Nia moved towards the kitchen and soon Y/N heard the sound of dishes clattering. “But you know you’ll see her soon.”

“I’ll see her soon,” Y/N echoed. She took a bite of her sandwich and for a split second the image of her grandfather came rushing back to her. Tall and proud, with white hair and a beard, a smile just as bright as Santa Claus. She closed her eyes and thought about his hugs, how strong and comforting they were. She reopened them and looked down at the phone. Carefully, she pressed the power button.

In seconds she was greeted by the cell phone screen, with two familiar faces as the wallpaper. She giggled a little, thumb tracing over Kara and Theo, beaming at her from the glass. Kara had her arms around the dog, her chin pressed to the top of his head; Theo’s tongue lolled out of his mouth and it seemed as if he was, in fact, smiling for the camera. Alex must have taken it, Y/N surmised; a quick look to the side of the phone showed that she could take pictures too and she smiled. Maybe Miss Kara would let her… Pressing the icon for Contacts, she saw that Miss Kara had added herself, Alex, and Maggie as Y/N’s emergency contacts. Y/N quirked an eyebrow when she saw that beyond the numbers for the three of them, Nia, and Mount Overland House, there were also phone numbers for several theaters, playhouses in the National City area, she guessed. Miss Kara’s work number was there as well. Not only that but there were two other numbers, one for the bus system and the other for the taxi service. There was that warm feeling again, when Y/N realized that Miss Kara had given her pretty much any number she’d need to start finding her way now that she was (not really) alone.

“You look happy,” Nia said, coming into the living room and sitting in one of the armchairs with a plate of pasta in her hand. “Good phone?”

“I’ve never had one,” Y/N said, turning it over in her hands. “All I had was the phone at my ho- at the house, and James had a cell phone.”

“You know, I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you call him by name.”

“Does it get easier?”

It felt wrong, not to call him Sir. To call your Sir by his name was the highest form of disrespect, or so she’d been taught. That was one thing in which she’d never slipped up, not that it ever gained her any sort of gratitude or special treatment. She didn’t expect it, either. It was just something you were supposed to do, and now, even though she didn’t have his collar around her neck, even though what he’d wanted to do was so… Y/N reached up and trailed her fingers over her neck, where the collar used to be. It still felt so strange not to have it there; it was almost as if she was naked. She was glad she’d been unconscious when it had been removed; she didn’t think she could have borne the pain of having the metal snapped from her, even if she had made her choice the night she’d run away.

“It gets easier.” Nia nodded. “The best part of it is when you realize how easy it is to not give them that respect, because they never deserved it to begin with.”

Y/N’s eyes widened. “I-I don’t think I’m there yet…” she trailed off. Didn’t every Dominant deserve respect?

“No, but you’re a long way from where you were.”

“I don’t remember being brought to the House…” Y/N finished up her sandwich, not looking at Nia.

“Probably best you don’t,” Nia said with a shrug. “There really isn’t any point in dwelling on things you can’t change.”

It seemed like all she did lately was dwell, Y/N thought. In her mind she still kept wondering if maybe things had been different, if she’d been better, maybe James wouldn’t have been so angry, maybe she wouldn’t have had to run away…. He’d been so frustrated, it was the first time she’d heard him say that he didn’t know what to do, and that had scared her more than anything.

Because he’d always known what to do, what he had been doing. To her. Every word, every stroke, every blow was calculated even as it was reckless and frenzied. He’d always known exactly what he was doing. Hadn’t he?

“You should send her a message.”

Nia’s words brought Y/N out of her thoughts, and she glanced at her, then down at the phone. “I should?”

“Well yeah, I mean I bet that’s part of the reason she gave it to you. You didn’t think she was going to completely cut you off, did you?”

I believe he said she could rot in hell.

They hadn’t meant for her to hear those words, but just because she didn’t talk at first didn’t mean she was deaf, and when Nia had said that to Miss Kara, despite everything it was like a knife through Y/N’s heart. She wasn’t sure if she believed that perhaps James would change, perhaps he would come to her and say that everything would be different now if only she would come back to him, come home.

Back to the little white house at the end of Russell Street. Back to a spotless clean kitchen that always had one crumb. To a bed that always had a wrinkle, with a blanket on the floor. A rule that was always broken, a look that was always wrong, a girl…

A girl never good enough.

And then Miss Kara had walked away, with tears in her eyes, but she’d walked away just the same.

But there was a teddy bear on her new bed, mango body wash in her new bathroom, and a new phone in her hand… Y/N fumbled around with it for a few moments, and then looked at Nia helplessly. Nia smiled at her and took the phone, handing it back after showing Y/N how to get to the text messages.

Slowly, her fingers sliding around over the touch keyboard, Y/N typed out a message to Kara and hit send.

I made a sandwich.

She waited for what seemed like an eternity, on the edge of her seat. She jumped at the alert sound, her face brightening when it meant that Kara had answered.

Hello to you too :) Did you enjoy it?

Y/N giggled a little in embarrassment; she probably should have said hi first.

It wasn’t as good as yours. But it was nice.

The best part of the text messages, she decided, was that Kara’s face appeared in a little icon next to her name. Y/N’s finger traced the outline and she smiled softly to herself. Miss Kara was so beautiful.

You should keep making sandwiches, and then perhaps you’ll be just as good as I am!

That made her laugh, and her fingers were dancing over the screen again as if she’d been text messaging forever. She felt like a child with a new toy, and it was all because of Miss Kara.

I miss you already, Miss Kara. When can I see you again?

It was true. Already she missed her smile, her laugh, and her hugs. She hadn’t wanted to leave, and Y/N would be lying if she didn’t say a little part of herself was angry at Miss Kara for forcing them apart. She couldn’t think of any reason why they needed to be; hadn’t Y/N said that she wanted her?  Why wouldn’t Miss Kara want her, unless Y/N really wasn’t good enough? But Miss Kara had said that wasn’t true… Y/N just didn’t know if she could trust it quite yet.

Seconds later, the phone beeped again.

Soon, Y/N. For now, you need to enjoy yourself. But I promise, I’m not leaving you.

She didn’t know what she could say to that. They always left. Her grandpa had left her; her parents had left her on the third step of that little white house and then drove away without a word, without a goodbye or a hug, even a last look through a window. Even her own voice had left her, eventually.  And in the end, Y/N had been the one to leave, the last, final realization that everything, that everyone, was gone, including herself.

She kept playing with the phone while Nia watched television, laughing at some comedy show and trying to get Y/N involved. But all Y/N could do was flip back and forth between the text messages with Miss Kara, and Miss Kara’s face on the wallpaper.

I’m not leaving you. Miss Kara’s face. I’m not leaving you. Miss Kara’s face.

I’m not leaving…

She chose to go to bed at 11:35. Nia had fallen asleep in her chair and was snoring, her chin resting against her chest. Every now and then she’d wake up with a start and Y/N would giggle. She hoped the other woman would make it to bed soon enough; going to sleep in an armchair meant a hurting body in the morning. Y/N knew that all too well.

The sheets were scratchy against her skin; not at all soft like the ones in her room at Miss Kara’s, but not half as bad as the ones in her room at Mount Overland House, either. Maybe she’d make use of Nia’s laundry room tomorrow and wash her sheets. Hopefully she’d have some fabric softener, but if not… no, Y/N decided, pulling the blankets up to her chin. She wasn’t going shopping. Not by herself. She couldn’t do that.

There was a quiet beep, and the room lit up in a muted color; Y/N turned over in bed and frantically scrabbled for the phone on the bedside table. Kara’s face smiled at her from its tiny icon.

I hope you sleep well. Good night, Y/N.

She thought a moment, and then sent her own.

Is Theo okay?

She knew what she really wanted to ask, but she wasn’t sure if that was allowed. After all, neither of them belonged to the other. But if Kara was sad or upset alone in her house with the exception of Theo, Y/N thought that might hurt her worse than anything James Olsen had ever done to her.

Theo’s fine. We miss you.

We. It was the first time she’d smiled a real smile that day. It didn’t matter if they were apart, it didn’t matter if neither of them knew how things were going to end up, or where they were going to go. All that mattered was that Miss Kara missed her.

Miss Kara? Why are there theater numbers in my phone?

… Good night, Y/N. Sweet dreams. :)

Good night, Miss Kara.

Sometime around 11:56, Y/N fell asleep in yet another unfamiliar bed, teddy bear in her arms, and her new cell phone with Miss Kara’s smiling face held snugly in her hand.

[previous] | [next]

[acidblackpirate]

4th Advent Before Christmas

Final part. (Check for Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3). Have a Merry Christmas!

Yasu closed the cupboard and checked the one next to it.

He felt bad for going through the kitchen of someone else that shamelessly, but he figured Hyde wouldn’t have a problem with it once he woke up. After all, he seemed to feel misplaced in his own apartment as well. Both of them were strangers at this home.

“Ah, finally”, yasu mumbled and took out two white cups from the shelf.

Even the dishes looked weirdly impersonal at Hyde’s place. You might get served out of these cups at a café, too. There was no colour to them, that someone had chosen due to their liking. There were no desperately-funny pictures on them, either, that proved they had once been a gift of someone clueless of what else to give. There were no logos on them, because they had joined this household as a promotional gift. They were just plain white as if their creator had forgotten to add a story to them.

He poured coffee into the cups. Hyde owned a very expensive coffee machine, that had taken yasu ages to figure out how to even switch it on. The coffee smelled decent, though. He assumed Hyde would be thankful for it.

It was almost noon already and yasu had tried to gather something for breakfast as well, but the insides of the refrigerator had been astonishingly random. He had found some carrots in there, tomato sauce, a six-pack of cheap beer, soy milk and garlic that clearly belonged somewhere else. He had reached the conclusion that they should rather grab something to eat outside.

Yasu took up the two cups and entered the living room.

Hyde was curled up on the black couch in a way that made him look even smaller and frailer than he already was. He was wrapped up in a red blanket. Hyde had pulled it out of one of the cupboards last night and yasu thought that it was the only thing in his apartment that really looked used. The fabric was thin in the middle; fraying at the edges. At least, the blanket seemed to have a history – a story, of how it had ended up that way.

“Hey”, yasu said softly and put down the cups on the coffee table.

Hyde let out a quiet groan and shifted on the couch.

Obviously, he had been awake more or less already.

Yasu sat down on the floor cross-legged. His face was eye-level with Hyde now as he rolled to the side and blinked at yasu sleepily.

“Good morning, yasu”, he mumbled, his voice slurring. “You still here?”

“Yep”, yasu said and nodded towards the steaming cups on the table. “And I made coffee.”

“You figured out how to use the coffee machine?”, Hyde assured and sat up. Yasu had to tilt back his head to keep looking at his face. “That sounds like a Christmas miracle.”

Yasu snorted.

“It wasn’t that hard”, he said. “Though I didn’t know that water could actually catch fire.”

Hyde shook his head very slightly and took up a cup of coffee. Steam was still rising from it, so yasu assumed it was still hot, but Hyde drank in large, greedy gulps.

“I’ll think of something funny to reply after my second cup, alright?”, he said, lowering the cup.

He was holding it with both hands, but it still looked large between his fingers He wasn’t just holding it. He was holding on to it. The cup seemed more solid than Hyde.

“Take your time”, yasu said and took up his coffee as well.

He liked the feeling of holding a warm cup better than he liked drinking coffee, though.

“What happened last night?”, Hyde wanted to know and furrowed his brow at the red blanket. “I don’t remember, it’s like I passed out.”

His eyes looked small with sleep, still, and dark smudges of makeup had appeared around his lashes that had been almost invisible last night. It always happened to yasu, too, no matter how throughout he removed the makeup, it always reappeared the next morning. Hyde’s skin looked very smooth.

“Well, you did pass out”, yasu said with a small smile. “We were arguing like ›you take the bed‹, ›no, no, you take the bed‹ and before we could agree on anything, you fell asleep on the couch.”

Hyde let go of the cup with one hand to rub his face with it. It looked as if he was trying to reanimate his skin, as if he could massage life and feeling back into it.

“I’m sorry”, Hyde said.

Yasu shook his head.

“It’s alright”, he said. “Your bed is comfy.”

“Ah”, Hyde mumbled and sat up a little straighter.

He made a face as if he wanted to indicate the protests of his back.

“Sleeping on the couch isn’t as easy as it used to be, is it?”

“I wouldn’t have minded sharing the bed”, yasu pointed out.

He still wasn’t sure how he felt about the fact that Hyde had urged him to sleep separately. Yasu felt too old for taking his time. He also felt too old for rushing things, either. He wanted them to develop naturally. But Christmas was close and he didn’t really know how long the natural way would take them.

Hyde bent forward and placed the obviously empty cup on the coffee table. For a moment, he looked at it longingly, as if he hoped it would magically refill itself.

Yasu held out his own cup. The steam was already ceasing to rise from it, but he hadn’t taken a sip yet. Yasu liked holding on to a cup of coffee. He liked the smell. He even liked the process of making it. He liked the promise that he would feel more awake after drinking it. Mostly, he liked the idea of coffee.

“Take mine”, he offered.

Hyde hesitated for a brief second, but then he seemed to realize that yasu really meant it. He took the cup and started drinking again immediately.

When he lowered the cup, the corner of his mouth was curled slightly downwards, as if displeased and trying not to let it show. Yasu mused that Hyde preferred his coffee burning hot.

“Thanks”, Hyde said anyway. “And thanks for last night.”

Yasu smacked his lips, not sure what to say to that.

“You don’t have to thank me”, me clarified.

“I do”, Hyde insisted. “For showing up in the middle of the night. For cheering me up. For staying.”

Yasu wondered if Hyde was grateful for the kissing, too. Maybe that was what he meant by cheering him up. Yasu wished he had mentioned it, though. He wished he would have gotten some clarity, if last night had been a messed up date or whiskey and loneliness.

“Just don’t sue me”, he said and nodded over to the new paintings on the wall. “I’m not a very good interior decorator it seems.”

They looked cheerful, but not as appropriate as they had seemed last night. The bright daylight changed them into something else. Now, the sloppiness of the lines showed clearly and the white of the walls all around seemed to close in on the pictures. They looked misplaced now and like they needed company. Not so much the company of other pictures, but the company of things in general – things that had a story to tell. The pictures resembled two single poems inside a furniture catalogue.

“It’s alright”, Hyde said seriously and put down the second cup as well. “At least you were cheap.”

“Oh, you don’t know cheap, unless you’ve seen me in my leather pants”, yasu joked.

He couldn’t recall the last time he had actively tried to flirt with someone. He felt stiff about it, like he might have gotten out of practice. For a while, sexual jokes had come to yasu as naturally as breathing. Nowadays, his replies didn’t sound so smooth anymore.

He was glad that Hyde chuckled, though. His chest tingled slightly. He had forgotten, too, how it felt when you really meant it.

“I wasn’t referring to you as a person, rather to your service”, Hyde said.

His voice was sounding more awake now, almost cheerful.

“You weren’t pleased with my service?”, yasu teased, looking up to Hyde through his lashes.

“I was very pleased with your service”, Hyde corrected, dragging out the syllables without looking away from yasu. “I just think there is still room for improvement, room to go up.”

“Aah”, yasu said and stretched his arms. “I actually prefer going down.”

This time, Hyde snorted out loudly and turned his head.

“You haven’t changed a bit in the last twenty years, yasu”, he observed.

“I did”, yasu said and kept his eyes fixed on Hyde. “My technique became flawless. And I’m not talking about the singing here.”

Hyde turned his head away. Yasu would have sworn that his cheeks coloured slightly.

“You did change”, Hyde confirmed. “You became bolder.”

“I was shy around you back then”, yasu admitted.

Just looking at Hyde directly for too long had made him nervous. He hadn’t imagined he would have dared to cause Hyde to blush.

“You are not shy anymore, that’s for sure”, Hyde said and looked at yasu again.

His eyes looked awake and attentive now after two cups of coffee. The strands of his hair were entangled in a way that only happened when you went to sleep with moist hair. Combing it would be a real pain.

“What do you want to do today?”, Hyde asked, all of a sudden changing the subject – or rather sticking to the subject, if yasu had answered honestly.

For a moment, he smiled to himself, fighting down the urge to make another sexual joke.

“I thought we could go shopping for Christmas presents”, he suggested. “That means, if you haven’t done so already.”

Hyde groaned and closed his eyes. He shook his head.

“No, I wasn’t even planning on doing so this year. I thought I’d just order something online last minute for the people I really have to give something to and ignore all the others.”

“Perfect”, yasu announced. “We can do it together then and I’ll help you. For the good old times.”

Hyde put on a grin and folded back the blanket.

“Alright then”, he agreed. “Just let me get dressed first.”

He slipped his bare feet into the white slippers next to the couch. He had very small feet. Yasu wondered how such small feet were able to carry a human being at all. But then, Hyde was a pretty small human being.

“Okay”, he admitted, leaning back without getting up from the floor as Hyde stood. “As long as you dress in something sexy for me.”

“Man”, Hyde said and turned around with a little swirl, before walking off to the bedroom. He was grinning. His grin was boyish, still. “You are really asking for it this morning.”

Yasu shrugged and put on an innocent smile – or at least a smile as innocent as he was capable of; which, admittedly, wasn’t very innocent at all.

“It’s a date”, he reminded Hyde.

Hyde nodded.

Yasu looked after him and got up from the floor. The youthful energy that had put him in the mood for flirting, hadn’t reached his body quite yet. Maybe it would, though, during the day. Like when he took Hyde home after their date again. His body would surely feel full of energy by then.

He reached for the red blanket and folded it neatly, where Hyde had just dropped it onto the couch carelessly. Then he took up the two empty cups, carrying them over to the kitchen sink. He wasn’t the tidiest person himself, but he had already been in the bath before making coffee and now had nothing else to do while waiting for Hyde.

He wondered if Hyde was really going to put on something sexy for him. The thought made yasu feel weirdly excited.

Of course, the excitement wasn’t strange in itself. It was the same fluttering in the chest, the same dropping of the stomach, the strange numbness of hands, because they suddenly seemed too heavy and always got in the way and you no longer knew what to do with them, the same feeling altogether that always took hold of him whenever he liked someone.

And it was even normal to feel it before a date with Hyde – the Hyde, the one he had always admired.

What made the excitement weird, was the complete lack of it last night. Even when they had met at the café, yasu had not felt exactly excited. Happy to see Hyde, happy that he had called. Hopeful, that this time it might work out for them. Scared, that maybe it wouldn’t work out for them this time either. Nervous, about saying the wrong thing. Sad for having wasted so much time. Sentimental for their younger selves. Tired. But never excited.

Yasu wasn’t sure if he had forgotten to be excited, or if he just hadn’t been hopeful enough for it. You needed to believe in something to get excited about it. He wasn’t sure, if he had believed in Hyde and himself.

When he had woken in his bed this morning, though, yasu had found himself believing.

The sun had been bright, for he had slept in late, too. And the bed sheets had smelled of Hyde. And weirdly enough, yasu had felt completely at home.

“You don’t have to do that”, a voice interrupted him and yasu turned around.

His hands were still wet from cleaning the coffee cups. He looked around for a towel, but didn’t spot one. His fingertips were dripping.

Hyde was standing in the doorway to the kitchen. He had put on leather pants with lacing at the front as well as a silk shirt. Yasu suddenly felt very underdressed.

“Wow, you took that serious”, yasu observed. “Those clothes are way too sexy. We might cause an uproar on the street.”

“It’s a date”, Hyde reminded him in return and walked over to one of the cupboards.

He got out a white towel – even the kitchen towels were white at Hyde’s place – and handed it to yasu.

Yasu took it and dried his hands. He was taking his time to do so, scanning Hyde throughout from head to toe.

“I feel almost bad for not dressing up”, yasu said apologetic and gestured towards his own body.

He was still wearing the dark jeans and the fluffy black sweater he had worn last night. Of course, he hadn’t come over to Hyde’s place completely rundown, but he looked ready rather for a lazy day in than for an actual date.

“You look sexy anyway”, Hyde said.

He seemed to store some additional confidence in his closet as well. Yasu couldn’t say that he minded him talking like that.

Hyde took a step towards him. Yasu was still holding on the kitchen towel, indecisive what to do with it. He held it up between them like a protective shield now, although that was pretty ridiculous. Usually, yasu was one for attack, not defence.

Hyde took the towel from yasu’s hands and placed it onto the kitchen counter. While usually, he would watch his surroundings closely – even following his own motions with his eyes – he now kept his gaze on yasu. For a change, he wasn’t distracted by anything and being looked at by him had a strange effect on yasu. Under Hyde’s eyes, he felt more present, more real. Lately, he had felt like disappearing too much.

He hadn’t been aware of it, but a small part of yasu missed the publicity and missed the fans. He had never liked it much to be looked at by so many, as if the stares could wear him out eventually. But when they didn’t look at him at all, he felt forlorn and forgotten. How to be sure of your own existence, if no one was watching. Yasu figured, that the goal was to have very few people look at you so intensely, you didn’t need to be afraid of vanishing, and not afraid of wearing down, because their gaze was so gentle and careful.

Hyde was looking at him that way now.

“Hey”, yasu said quietly.

“Hey”, Hyde mumbled back and leaned in.

Last night, it was yasu who had kissed him. Years ago, it was Hyde who had waited to be kissed. Yasu wasn’t sure why he had changed his mind now.

He closed his eyes and allowed Hyde to kiss him gently. It wasn’t a passionate kiss, no gasps, no greed, no tongue and teeth and hunger. But it lasted too long to be just a peck, either, and yasu’s chest fluttered again. No fear and no insecurity and no regret. Just excitement. He smiled against Hyde’s lips.

Hyde pulled back.

“You know, actually”, yasu said. “We don’t have to go out at all.”

His head felt dizzy. Hyde was standing close.

“What about the Christmas presents?”, Hyde asked.

Up this close, yasu could see the lines on his face again. The weariness from last night hadn’t disappeared, even though they could pretend to not see it for a little while. He looked different from how he had looked back then. The feeling had stayed the same, though. Yasu was surprised at how little it had changed.

“You said yourself, that you weren’t planning on going shopping this year”, he reminded Hyde. “And there is still enough time anyway. We could go another time.”

“And do what instead?”, Hyde asked. His voice sounded playful.

Yasu reached up, letting his fingers slide down Hyde’s chest until they reached his waist. The silk of his shirt was smooth and cool. Yasu could feel the outlines of Hyde’s body underneath. He pulled him a little bit closer, still.

“I’d have a few suggestions”, he whispered.

Hyde chuckled and leaned in. He turned his head sideways and placed a short kiss on yasu’s neck. He was leaning against him, his body warm and frail. Yasu wondered if Hyde could hear his heartbeat. It was loud now.

“I’m not really the type to do it after just one date”, Hyde said lowly.

His hair was combed now and very straight. The strands were tingling yasu’s cheek. They felt soft.

“Christmas shopping ten years ago”, yasu said. “The café. Last night. This morning. It’s four dates, basically.”

Hyde laughed and yasu could sense the vibration of his body all over. Then Hyde stepped back.

“This morning?”, he repeated incredulous.

Yasu pulled back the hands from his waist to give a most innocent shrug.

“I made you coffee”, he said.

Hyde tilted back his head and laughed. Even when he was laughing for real, not just chuckling under his breath, it still sounded quiet and gentle. Even his laughter seemed scared to disturb the peace of his surroundings.

“Take me out properly and I’ll think about it, okay?”, he suggested and took another step backwards.

Yasu rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t hide his smile entirely.

There was no need to take things slow, but no need to rush them, either. They would go with what felt right. Admittedly, having sex right now on the kitchen floor didn’t feel exactly wrong to yasu, either, but he more or less agreed that it wouldn’t be the most reasonable decision. The reasonable decision was to go on a real date, and at the end of it, to kiss Hyde and see where that led. They had been friends for so long already, the dating procedure could be cut short. But there should be something of a dating procedure to begin with.

“Fine”, yasu agreed and walked past Hyde towards the door. “Let’s go. The faster we find presents, the sooner I’m going to try myself with unlacing those pants.”

Hyde laughed once more and when he followed yasu, his hand was casually brushing yasu’s lower back. It was a tender gesture, not quite guiding, not quite by accident. He just seemed to make sure that yasu was still there. Yasu thought that felt nice. Just like Hyde’s eyes, his touch made him feel very present.

“Do you need presents for a lot of people?”, yasu asked and looked for his coat.

He couldn’t quite remember where he had placed it last night. Eventually, he found it hanging right next to the front door.

“Don’t get me started”, Hyde said with a sigh. “There seem to be more people each year. I don’t care about most of them, but I don’t want to be rude. Since I’m working with most of them, it might get back to me, if I don’t get them anything. What to buy for someone you hardly know?”

“Socks”, yasu said with determination.

Hyde laughed.

He was looking at his shoes, not at yasu. He bent forward as if he wasn’t planning to wear them, but rather start an interrogation. His facial expression was stern.

Yasu smirked while he watched him.

“Alright”, Hyde agreed. “Let’s just get a lot of socks. Everyone likes socks. We’ll be done fast.”

Hyde sat down on the floor.

Yasu snorted.

“What are you doing?”, he wanted to know.

Hyde looked up at him in surprise and for a moment, his face looked as if he had completely forgotten that yasu was still there.

“I’m putting on my shoes”, he explained. “I hate to jump around on one leg.”

He took up the first shoe and put it on. His motions were deliberate, but slow. He had chosen a pair of black boots with slight heels. Obviously, they had passed his silent questioning.

Yasu shook his head and watched Hyde get ready with utter calm while sitting on the floor.

He hadn’t known about this habit of Hyde. It surprised him and made him feel weirdly touched. He loved this part most about dating, he realized. Learning all those small things about someone, the really irritating ones you didn’t notice when only meeting them once in a while. The little backstories that made people who they were. He wanted to hear every story that Hyde had to tell.

“What?” Hyde looked up now, seemingly confused by the look on yasu’s face.

“Nothing”, yasu said. “You are cute.”

He extended his hand and Hyde took it, allowing yasu to pull him to his feet.

“Thanks”, he said.

Yasu wasn’t sure if Hyde had meant the gesture or the compliment.

He opened the front door and stepped outside.

The view was different in daylight. Even from the second floor, you could look out across the neighbourhood.

Yasu stepped outside and inhaled deeply as Hyde locked the door behind himself.

December was mild this year and his breath didn’t form clouds anymore today. The sky was almost colourless, though. It looked both washed-out and very clean at once.

“You should have taken a cap”, yasu said, without turning around to check on Hyde.

“I lost my last one”, Hyde said. “Must have happened somewhere during a tour.”

“Too bad”, yasu said and turned around.

Hyde was wearing the coat again, that seemed slightly too large for his arms. The were dangling down at his sides as if someone had attached them only on second thought.

With the light falling in this angle, nearly blinding, Hyde looked almost like he had looked years ago. His posture was the same, his hair blonde and fluffy and falling into his face. He still looked young. And still, if he looked closely, yasu could spot the new lines, the circles under his eyes, that the sleep of last night hadn’t washed away altogether. He had aged just like yasu had, and stayed much the same, just like yasu had. Both of them had become a little more self-confident, a little more tired, a little more mature. They had learned how to deal with their time, even if they had grown disillusioned, too. In the end, it wasn’t any better nor any worse, yasu concluded.

There were still things to learn about Hyde, like his habits when putting on shoes, or how he would moan when yasu kissed him in a certain way. That probably meant they were still at the beginning; that probably meant they were still young enough to try again. But they were less stupid now – hopefully – and that might mean they had an actual chance.

The chance made yasu feel excited, because – this time around more than ever – he believed in it.

“I still don’t know about my family, though”, Hyde suddenly said.

Obviously, his mind had been on other things.

His eyes were not on yasu, but looking out onto the view behind him. They hadn’t even turned to the staircase yet. But yasu didn’t mind that Hyde wasn’t looking at him right now. Looking at Hyde, he felt present enough already.

“I can’t get them socks, can I?”

Yasu chuckled and extended his hand.

Hyde took it.

They would have to let go of each other, once they hit the street. They didn’t want people to look at them too closely, and they didn’t want the gossip, nor the scandal.

But at least for now, they could hold on to each other. Hyde’s hand felt very warm.

“That’s the good thing about going shopping together now”, yasu said and smiled.

He felt hopeful.

“You don’t have to deal with it alone. We can figure it out together.”