#but the thing that always makes those places creepy to me is the solitude!!! it freaks me out!!!
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
yanderenightmare · 11 months ago
Text
L "Lawliet"
rewatched Death Note and just couldn't resist...
TW: strict schooling ig, orphan reader, creepy behavior
gn reader
Tumblr media
You were placed in Wammy’s House at an age you don’t remember. To you and most of the orphans here, it’s been your entire lives. Birthdays aren’t celebrated. The days are cold, the residents even colder. There was a time when you’d consider them brothers and sisters, but that’s also long ago now. No one is close to each other in this house.
It’s a rather stale existence with boring conditions unfit for normal children – the solitude, the competition, the games, always a ploy to make each other feel worthless. And for what… more riddles to solve?
You’d long lost interest in proving yourself among the prodigies. When you were given puzzles, you always played with them differently than the rest. They’d tell you to fill out the sheets, and you ended up making origami swans instead.
Looking around at the others, you knew you would never understand them – all blank faces staring into space. They all make you uneasy. You don’t know if it’s you or them that’s missing something, but you recognize it’s a rather pointless question to be begged. 
So you leave your paper flock on the floor and walk away.
You’d started putting the chisel of a black marker to the library books in your spare time – trying to make something else out of the boring pages. Something more palatable than the droning of law and policy you’d already read ten times over.
You had blacked out the word doppelganger when there came a disturbance.
“You had 84% of them right.”
You peeked up from the book, lowering your knees from where you had them tucked close for privacy – sitting on the floor between two bookshelves – a little nook you’d discovered to hide yourself from the rest of the busy readers in the usually crowded library.
It was empty now. Everyone was otherwise busy with the test still.
And yet, a mess of black hair was crouched down in front of you, shadowing his equally dark eyes. He held your swans unfolded in his hands. It was a disturbing sight for some reason – as though he’d dissected their guts. 
“You left 16% unanswered. Most people would test their luck and guess.”
L must have been the least creative alias born in the dull walls of Wammy’s House, and yet, he’s supposed to be the brightest of all those living there. He always finishes your tests early and leaves in favor of his own devices. Much like you, you suppose. You don’t think you’ve ever heard him speak before.
Suppose it’s only courtesy you pay him the same effort even when what you really want is to tell him to leave you alone…
You narrowed your eyes a bit, looking at him.
You sensed foul play in a game you had no wish to partake in but moved across the board like a sacrificial pawn anyway. That’s how you play these things, after all – never show your cards.
“There’s nothing to guess.” You sigh – despite knowing he already knows all this. “The blanks are trick questions.”
“So you noticed, too?” His eyes are like inkblots – much like those spills you’ve made in your book when you let the marker rest too long. He dropped your papers between you in favor of gripping his knees, leaning forward. “We’re the only ones.”
You purse your lips at his eagerness. You should have played dumb from the start – should have said you swiped the answer sheet from the headmaster’s office. He’d only spoken all but four sentences, and you were already exhausted. Any conversation with any one of your peers was like an interrogation.
“You started folding paper cranes when I was 94% done. Easy logistics would put you 6% ahead of me. But, unlike me, it didn’t seem you were filling out the answer sheets in any hurry. In fact… you seemed bored. And in that case, I’d put you around 16%, no... 18% ahead of me.”
You allowed the following silence to inform him that his ramblings were boring you. But it didn't seem he took the hint – showing no signs he planned on leaving.
Your eyes grew more jaded.
“Paper swans.” You corrected blandly. “You know my alias is Swan.”
You clapped your book together and sighed again.
“And we both know you were finished long before I started folding them.” 
He had a small smile on his face. It looked as if you’d drawn it on with your marker.
“You can state all the percentages in the world to try and confuse me, but your mind games won’t get under my skin for one single simple reason, L…” You got up and brushed off the dust, then walked away while saying, “I’m not interested in playing – not with you or anyone else in this miserable place. So do me a favor and leave me alone.”
L watches you leave and taps his lips with his pointer.
Puzzles and answer sheets have bored him for a while. Maybe he ought to play with you instead…
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
mars-ipan · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
YES YES YOU GET IT EXACTLY THANK YOU
i think part of why i love tsp is i love horror but hate threats
#if u can’t tell i recently watched a video essay on liminality in video games#but the thing that always makes those places creepy to me is the solitude!!! it freaks me out!!!#also gonna use this as an excuse to mention that every ‘character’ in tsp that the narrator makes is Not Alive!!! they are all Inanimate!!!#the line™️. stanley’s ‘wife.’ the broom closet. the fucking reassurance bucket#none of them are living. none of them have the capacity to care#but they are all personified!!! anthropomorphized really#You Are Alone and the narrator is your sole company and even when he makes you companions you are still alone!!!!!#i know they probably picked a bucket bc it’s a funny idea for a comfort item. but i love overanalyzing#think abt a bucket right now. pretty good size to hug! pretty convenient to hold#but it’s cold. and hard. and depending on quality it’s jagged#it offers a solace it cannot provide!!!! it!!!! AUGH#i am obsessed with solitude as a means of horror i am OBSESSED with it#when we are alone for too long our confidence in everything lowers. we dissociate and derealizd#like the fuckin saying! if a tree falls and nobody’s around to hear it does it make a sound?#it’s the same thing!!! if you do something and nobody is around to witness it did it truly happen?? are you even truly there????#FUCK WAIT SCHRÖDINGER’S BOX. IT’S SCHRÖDINGER’S BOX#ok i need to stop before i go Crazy#anyways thank you august for getting me i can always rely on you for environmental horror appreciation
17 notes · View notes
calisources · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
NETFLIX'S WEDNESDAY SENTENCE QUOTES. these quotes are taken from netflix's wednesday (2022). change names and pronouns as you see fit. all warnings regarding the dark humor and nature of the show are in place. might be mentions of blood, murder, killing and such. - requested by anonymous.
I’m not sure whose twisted idea it was to put hundreds of adolescents in underfunded schools run by people whose dreams were crushed years ago, but I admire the sadism. 
Pugsley, emotion equals weakness.
Nevermore is like no other boarding school. It’s a magical place.
Wednesday always looks half dead.
Please excuse Wednesday, she’s allergic to color.
I find social media to be a soul sucking void of meaningless affirmation.
Look at you my little deathtrap.
You’re a brilliant girl, Wednesday, but sometimes you get in your own way.
Too odd for the normies, not odd enough for the outcasts.
These are all traits of great writers. And serial killers.
Sometimes I act like I don’t care if people like me. Deep down, I secretly enjoy it.
The most interesting plants grow in the shade.
I like to win. Is that so wrong?
Wednesday Addams is not the girl of your dreams. She’s the stuff of your nightmares
Being your friend should come with a warning label.
It’s amateurs like you who give kidnapping a bad game.
Are you mansplaining my power?
Emotion isn’t exactly your strong suit. 
I don’t believe in heaven or hell, but I do believe in revenge.
Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.
It’s not solitude if you’re still here.
I almost killed you.
There’s nothing quite like the feeling of being proven right.
Because trust and cooperation have always been the hallmarks of our relationship.
I can’t believe I’m actually going to miss your creepy, lifeless eyes waking me up every morning.
Anytime I grow nauseous at the sight of a rainbow or hear a pop song that makes my ears bleed, I’ll think of you.
When the dance floor calls, you gotta answer.
Typically I have great admiration for well-executed revenge plots, but yours was a bit extreme, even for my high standards. 
Kind of a deja vu thing we got going on huh? 
I can’t believe you were in a secret society and didn’t tell me.
Please. Flattery will get you nowhere.
You’re like a cockroach.
You brought a gun to a sword fight. Probably the first smart decision you’ve made today. 
You can keep trying to push me away. It's not going to work.
I’m not interested in participating in tribal adolescent clichés.
I actually fillet the bodies of my victims then feed them to my menagerie of pets.
I do like stabbing. The social part, not so much.
I know I’m stubborn, single-minded, and obsessive. But those are all traits of great writers… And serial killers.
For the record I don’t believe that I’m better than everyone else. Just that I’m better than you.
If he breaks your heart, I’ll nail gun his.
I enjoy funerals. I’ve been crashing them since I was old enough to read the obituary section.
I will ignore you, stomp on your heart, and always put my needs and interests first.
Of course the first boy I kiss would turn out to be a psychotic, serial-killing monster. I guess I have a type.
Just some light torture. Don’t worry, I won’t leave a mark.
50 notes · View notes
woundlingus · 9 months ago
Note
🌍 🎶 🐈‍⬛ 🇪🇺
🇪🇺honestly I thought about lying but really you plug it into my search bar and I post politics and memes that are really only relevant to my country so I will admit I am Australian 🦘
🎶Hozier. Forever and always Hozier. I saw him live in San Diego, changed my life. Next in line is Chappel Roan please please please like my wife she’s the best she’s soooo pretty and her music fucking slaps 😭
🐈‍⬛ I’ll be real I’m a little bit of a hater 👀 I’ve had a lot of pets and it’s not that I don’t love them it’s just that I don’t think I’m built for that kind of companionship. I like to observe foxes from afar, I’d never want to be one of those people who thinks they can tame a fox because it’s dog shaped and smaller than a wolf. That’s still a wild animal don’t be mean… but I guess if not that, then my dog is probably my favourite just because she’s my girl regardless of how annoying she is, I can’t sleep without her next to me
🌏favourite place…… I’ve been around, and honestly I don’t think anything beats the highest point in the Swiss alps. I’d never seen snow until that point, and you take the jungfrau train up to the point and then walk through this tunnel out to pure white, I’d never seen so much white in my life. Switzerland is just so beautiful generally, I stayed in this tiny village and they cooled our drinks in the run off from the mountains because it’s so ice cold it’s faster than any kind of freezer, and it’s all green, and it sounds tropical despite the chill because it’s so silent out there you can hear the thousands of tiny little waterfalls from the run off of the alps, makes you understand why they protect silence by law. It’s a little unnerving too though, it was so beautiful and exciting at first but it’s so much white nothing and a thousand foot drop at any misstep outside the bounds created by these tiny little string ropes, really gives you The Call Of The Void if you’ve ever experienced that, it’s like the little nagging feeling that says you should jump or other various really dangerous things for inexplicably no real rhyme or reason. Staring out into absolute nothingness on the highest peak of the highest mountain with nothing but blinding white surrounding you on all sides and just having the most unnerving feeling that I should walk out into the snow for miles and miles like I was being called to something was so wild I actually had to go back down the mountain before I became a statistic.
The mountain does things to people, maybe it’s just the elevation messing with the head, but it’s creepy. Beautiful. But I wouldn’t linger for too long. Godspeed to the cattle farmers living in solitude up that high- I think they might need it.
Ask Game
2 notes · View notes
snappleapple · 4 years ago
Text
their favorite types of kisses
people in this - dream, georgenotfound, sapnap, wilbur, punz, jschlatt, awesamdude, quackity
headcanon!
the most disgusting fluff i’ve ever written
warning - cursing, i think that’s all but if there is more please do not hesitate to tell me :)
word count - 2k
a/n: okay okay, i might’ve lied earlier about that being my last post but this was short and easy to make which is why i would like to feed my readers this early haha. anyways, enjoy and please disregard the errors in this post, i hate proof reading anything lol. also, i’ve been very indecisive on the title and i might change it later and ooh, my masterlist will be made soon. i’ve just been feeling very unproductive these days. also, please put in requests, i am so bored and dumb therefore there are no ideas in this brain. and if you’d like a part 2, i might add more people for the part 2!anyways, peace!
Tumblr media
dream -
i get the feeling that dream’s favorite type of kisses would be cheek kisses
he just likes to watch as you struggle to reach his height
“aw look at those little legs do their thing.”
ends up with you not giving him his kiss
and mans becomes SO pouty
“y/n…come on. don’t be this way.” :(
if you don’t kiss him on the cheek, will also become SO clingy and whiny
“why won’t you KISS ME!”
clenches his fists and stomps away like a teenage girl during puberty
slamming the door to your room
so then you have to go and give him all the kisses he wants
his face is slammed into your pillow
you sit on the side of the bed and pet his hair
leading him to stare up at you with puppy dog eyes
“i will give you all the kisses you want. so stop being so pouty, you big baby.”
will literally leave zero feet of space between you and him
taps his cheek to tell you he wants kisses
when you go on dates, will literally make you stand on your tippy toes to get his kisses
does not bend down at all and actually lifts his head higher to tease you
in other words, clingy but rude hoe
Tumblr media
george -
george is a classic romantic
he loves just lip kisses
pecks or lingering ones
he doesn’t care
mans don’t need too many kisses
nor does he need to be too clingy
total opposite of dream and sapnap *ahem clingy ahem*
if he wants a kiss,
he will come over to you and get it
doesn’t get pouty if you’re busy
just waits patiently
doesn’t enjoy it when you interrupt him when he’s streaming so you do your own thing
when you’re watching a movie with him,
he will literally only stare at you with his cute smile
and listen to your every criticism of the movie
he likes to just peck your lips whenever he feels like it
and you’re just not surprised anymore
just likes to stare at your lips whenever you talk
overall, is very sweet but not to an extent with showing affection
Tumblr media
sapnap -
omg
sapnap just vibes with neck kisses
it tickles his neck and he loves them
giggles when you pepper kisses along his neck and flushes a deep red
“y/n. stop.” giggles between each word
but when you do, becomes the saddest person in the whole world
“i was joking.” :(
when he’s streaming and he begins to miss you
would leave his room and find you just to get a kiss
just like dream, would get angry if you give him no kisses
“GIVE ME KISSIES!”
very amusing for you
and you love to tease him
“i don’t want to give you kissies.”
continues to stare at you with a large frown until you give in and give him kissies
lsg supremacy but i’ll get into this later hehe
you better give him kisses or you’ll be dealing with a very sad sapnap
sadnap :(
Tumblr media
wilbur -
wilbur, wilbur, wilbur
what can i even say
total nose kiss guy
i bet he’ll boop your nose twenty four seven
asks stupid questions just to get your attention
“y/n?”
“yes wilbur?”
“is a hotdog a sandwich?”
“why-“
“boop.”
“did you just say boop while you booped my nose?”
if he’s streaming and you bring him a snack
he will hold your face still and leave kisses on your nose
not too clingy but not too distant
likes to be just right with you
if its snowy outside and your noses get red
makes dumb jokes about he is rudolph and you’re mrs. rudolph
just a lot of smooches from wilby
takes you to a lot of hidden cafes in the city
and while you read, he balances his head on his palm, staring at you in admiration
if you’re insecure about your nose, you legit can’t be around wilbur because he will go on a tangent about how beautiful it is
substantially, soft boy hours all day bro, besides when he gets mad then you leave the hormonal man tf alone
Tumblr media
punz -
i don’t see a lot of punz on tumblr so here we go
punz loves hand kisses
not to an extent where he has a hand fetish
god no but just like
when your holding hands, he’ll occasionally pull your hand up to his lips and leave a kiss
lots of hand holding
and i mean lots
constantly gets mad fun of for being a simp but ignores those comments because he genuinely loves you so much
likes it when you play with his hair and messing it up
also likes to compare hand sizes with you
always has a hand on your thigh or your hand in his whenever he is driving somewhere with you
even when you go on dates, always holding hands
no matter how sweaty your hand gets, he will hold on
sometimes if he holds on for too long, you have to tell him to let go
“punz, my hand is super sweaty. lets take a break from the hand holding.”
would flat out decline so you would have to pry your hand out of his
he would also love it when you would kiss his hand
makes him feel all polite and precious LOL
would also wrap his pinky along yours when you walk together
he once came with you to a family gathering for christmas and was so SHY
shy boy held your hand for security while your younger siblings made fun of you
afterwards, when you were under a mistletoe, he kisses you on the lips before kissing you on his favorite part of your body,
your hand
Tumblr media
c!jschlatt -
jschlatt is a whole mess
the first time you met, he confessed that he would hate you for as long as you lived because you made fun of his boots
now he says he still strongly dislikes you but you’re more tolerable
doesn’t like it when you make him soft and HATES it when he blushes
“why must you do this to me, mother nature?”
also “hates” it when you even touch him because he “hates” you
when he actually confessed to you that he liked you with his grumpy usual grandpa voice,
you kissed him on his forehead, after he bent down of course
he is an actual giant and threatens to squash you like an ant if he feels the need to
is an absolute monster to you but loves it when you kiss his forehead because it makes him feel secure and loved
likes to watch the wind blow through your hair and mess it up but gives you his hat because he like you being “all pretty and shit”
gets SUPER jealous when you hug children
like for example, when you went over to a family gathering at his house, his cousins came up to hug you
and when you let go of the child, the man child comes and lugs you over his shoulder
gets yelled at by his mom and gives her a sheepish smile before rolling his eyes and throwing you down on the sofa set next to him
his mom doesn’t approve of the way he treats you but you tell her its fine because he’s cute
when you are far from any type of civilization or in the safety and solitude of your own home, he wants kisses on the forehead
pointing up to it and bending down so you could reach it
“y/n, i only love you because of your forehead kisses.”
“you only love me for my kisses?” :(
“mhm.”
actually feels slightly bad
“and because of your personality.”
“thank you-“
“shut up. we don’t talk about this.”
in conclusion, give him his forehead kisses or perish
Tumblr media
awesamdude -
sam just adores it when you give him jawline kisses
not because it’s basically the only place you could reach but because it’s a sweet gesture
sam is all about sweetness
i mean have you even seen this man on his stream
he likes to watch you while you have conversations with your friends
not in a creepy way but more like an adoring way
cause man does he love you
i mean not only does he love you but his whole family does
and when you’re alone with sam, you love to bury him underneath all of your love
“i love you sam!”
“no i love you more y/n!”
“NO i LOVE you more!”
“NO i LOVE you MORE!”
“SAM NO. I LOVE YOU MORE!”
“okay thank you sweet pea.”
leaving you a bit confused but happy that he accepts your love
when you cuddle, omg
he never stops peppering kisses all over your face and vice versa because your relationship is disgustingly fluffy
when he lends you one of his sweatshirts, you sure as hell better wear that shit out or else (i am leaving a blank threat here)
sam loves technology but you guys sort of have a system
a system that involves mailing each other love letters rather than texting them
you guys also go on a ton of walks just about anywhere
hand holding is mandatory even though you probably look like a child compared to him
just give sam lots of love and in return, you’ll receive lots of love
Tumblr media
quackity -
mans cannot leave you tf alone
likes to do ANYTHING freaky around you
“i will follow you to the ends of the earth, mi amor.” or
“ayy, back off.” if anyone gets too close to you
messes with you twenty four seven and makes it his job to drive you insane
plays horror games at two in the morning for fun
and when he gets scared, hides in the safety of your arms
“mi amor. i’m scared.”
“shut the fuck up and sleep, alex.”
“okay.” shuts up quickly and snuggles deeper into the crook of your neck
loves you so deeply but HATES your cat
“look at that little dumb thing stare at me. you got a problem bro?”
your cat also HATES alex
scratches him all the time and hisses at him
if you think sapnap is babie, wait till you meet alex
“y/n he bit me!”
when you glance down, you don’t even see a scratch
“kiss my boo boo.”
wtf
“what boo boo? there’s nothing there.”
gasps as if you offended him
“this boo boo that your el demonio did to me.”
this man will do anything to get boo boo kisses
istg, you once found him provoking your cat to get some scratches
in alex’s mind, ouchies = kisses from y/n
always has ouchies from god knows where and shows it to you
even though you find it annoying at first, you grow used to it and it sorta becomes your thing with alex
alex is babie and you need to take good care of him :)
9K notes · View notes
dancingamongstdust · 3 years ago
Text
Creepypasta Scenarios - First Meeting Part 2
Hoodie
The area where you lived had a ton of back alleyways that acted as shortcuts in a pinch. They were generally safe but you often got an uncomfortable feeling when using them so you preferred to take the busier roads if you could.
Unfortunately, when you had gone to leave work that day, you had spotted the customer who had been harassing you the entire day. It wasn’t anything creepy but it was over-the-top persistent and you weren’t in the mood to deal with it. You slipped out the backdoor as a result. At least you’d get home sooner.
For the most part, you didn’t encounter anything too suspicious and the light from the streets illuminated where you were going.
The large bins outside the grocer’s home indicated that you were getting close. You sped up and rubbed your eyes blearily.
Ahead of you, a dog was barking from inside one of the buildings. It was a pretty noisy animal and you began peering around to see what the source of its agitation was. Ironically, you ended up bumping directly into him.
“I’m sorry,” you apologised, rubbing your shoulder.
The guy was tall, wearing dark clothing and standing right in the shadows. You could have probably noticed him if you were a little more awake.
He turned and your breath caught.
His face was obscured by a dark mask with red features stitched onto it. His hoodie which originally seemed dark was now illuminated into a soft yellow or orange, stained with a dark substance.
“What are you doing here?” he asked. His voice crackled out, clearly coming through a voice changer of some kind.
“I – I was just taking a shortcut home. I live near here so I thought… I really didn’t mean to bump into you. I’m super tired.”
“Tired or not, you shouldn’t have seen me,” the guy said. “Do you have a phone or a camera?”
Slowly, you reached into your bag and pulled out your phone. “I don’t have any cash in my wallet –“
“I don’t want your money!” he snapped. “I’m not some petty thief, believe me, I have better things to do with me time. Unlock this.”
You did so and he went through it with a gloved hand. He didn’t have a weapon but something in your gut warned you to just go along with it. Nobody covered up everything, including their voice, when they were up to something good. This guy may not be a thief… but the alternative didn’t feel too much better.
He shoved your phone back at you. “Get out of here and don’t breathe a word of this to anybody. Consider yourself lucky that I’m in a good mood today.”
You swallowed nervously. “Thank you?”
“I’m serious,” he warned. “I can let you go just because you seem pathetic enough to not take this to the police but unless you want to catch a bullet in your back, you’ll keep quiet. My boss doesn’t like people getting involved with this nonsense.”
“A bullet?”
He didn’t answer and your heart thundered in your chest. Part of you wondered if he was going to kill you while you ran away but his attention seemed to have moved away from you. You hurried away, holding your breath the entire time. Every time you glanced over your shoulder, the guy remained unmoving.
When you reached your home, you locked the door tightly and slumped against it in exhaustion.
Homicidal Liu
The sunset was beautiful over the graveyard – the only beauty to an otherwise morbid place.
You stared at the purples and oranges dancing across the sky. The wreath pricked at your hands after a while and you stared down at it. Why did you still bother with bringing flowers? Hadn’t it been long enough? Still, you made your way down to the grave and placed them there, not even bothering to read the name on there.
Lately, your graveyard visits had becoming fewer and fewer. Time hadn’t been on your side recently and thus, your precious solitude had to suffer. You relished in the way that nobody really bothered you here.
An orange glow warned you when the streetlights came on. Perhaps you had been there for longer than you thought but this was to be your last visit.
Better to make it count.
Something caught in the wind made you raise your head. A piece of fabric was stuck in the nearby fence, identifiable as a scarf when you ventured closer.
You took it from the fence and looked around for its owner. Nobody was in view… maybe it had been blown off one of the graves? It did seem homemade.
Guessing, you began to place it on a grave when a voice startled you.
“I’m sorry to bother but I think you have my scarf?”
The man was standing far too close for you to have not seen him when you were glancing around but you blamed that on your night vision. He wore dark clothing and seemed awkward just to be speaking to you.
“Thank goodness,” you said. “I was just going to leave it on one of the graves because I didn’t know who it belonged to.”
He thanked you for it, wrapping it around the lower half of his face almost immediately. “That would be a waste,” he said. “Especially to leave it on this one. Thank you for grabbing it.”
A harsh wind blew through the graveyard, carrying with it the smell of an incoming storm. He grabbed his scarf just in time to prevent it from going flying away again.
“Seems like the weather is determined to steal it from you.”
“Far more powerful things have tried.”
You buried yourself further into your jacket and smiled. “I haven’t seen you around before, are you new in town or just coming to visit a new grave?”
“I’m not visiting a grave,” he admitted. “I just thought that this would be the way back to my house… I grew up in this town but only recently moved back and I’m already lost. It’s a little embarrassing if I’m honest.”
“Well, I like to know everybody,” you said. “What’s your name?”
“Su – I mean, Liu,” he said. “Liu. Sorry, I nearly gave you my surname.”
You laughed. “Oh that��s no problem. It’s nice to meet you but I really like your name. Is it Chinese?”
“I don’t know,” he said. He looked around and began walking away. “I really have to go. Thank you for getting my scarf and all that.”
“I’ll see you around,” you said with a wave.
It was only later when you realised how suspicious that entire interaction was. You had never seen Liu before in your life and he was just hanging around in the graveyard? He hadn’t seemed too creepy at least. Maybe you would see more of him in the coming days.
Jane the Killer
It wasn’t that you were unobservant or inattentive toward girls but nobody had really caught your eye until Jane.
She was stunning in a way that few people could ever match with dark hair that tumbled past her hips and soulful eyes. Her walk was always confident, her smile always perfect, and her attention always desirable. Your main regret about life was that you didn’t speak to her sooner – especially when you thought back on what happened not too long after your first meeting.
You organised with your friends to somehow bump into her but instead, you wound up getting treated for a pretty painful bruised hip. Your second plan didn’t work out either and your third never even left the drawing board.
“Just go up to her and say hi. Tell her that she’s beautiful,” your friend encouraged. “She’ll say thanks and then you’ll be able to talk to her.”
“That’s so boring though,” you said. “It’s not like something out of a romance novel.”
Your friend groaned and stood up. “Well, I’m going home. We have like three months left of high school and I’m not going to spend that time obsessing over how to speak to a girl. She’s literally a regular person.”
They were right and you knew that. No matter how you tried to set up a sweeping romance, it probably wouldn’t work out.
So you tried.
And you tried.
Two weeks later, you were about to give up on mimicking a romance novel and it appeared that your friend was thinking the same thing. She grabbed your arm and began to drag you somewhere, muttering about changing the topic. You had a vague idea of where you were going but you didn’t fight too much.
“What if she’s still dating that Woods boy?” you asked. “The older one.”
“They broke up after literally a month of dating. I don’t blame her – those Woods boys are pretty enough but the older one has something seriously wrong with him. And the younger one is always talking to himself…”
“I really don’t care about the Woods’,” you commented.
“No, you care about Jane who is honestly quite weird as well,” they said. “But that is going to be your problem and not mine.”
They dragged you directly up to her group. It wasn’t large – despite Jane’s beauty, she wasn’t incredibly popular due to her associations. Your friend wasn’t the only one who was a little scared of the Woods boys and Jane had hung out with them for quite a while.
“Hey,” your friend said before even letting you go. “You have no idea who we are but my friend here has a massive crush on you. Could you please just say hi so they can get it out of their system?”
You were sure that it was unhealthy to be as red as you were. It felt like your heart was about to leap from your chest.
Jane laughed, a soft and gentle sound. “I’m not really interested in a relationship,” she hummed. “But thank you. That’s very flattering.”
Somehow, your heart sped up still and you awkwardly rubbed your arm. “No problem?”
“Why don’t you join us for a little bit?” Jane offered. “Just because I don’t want to date anybody doesn’t mean that we can’t become friends. You look like my kind of person.”
You stumbled over your words but somehow, your conversation managed to go extremely well. Jane was brilliant in every possible way and you quickly grew attached to seeing her every day. That was why you mourned so greatly when she died.
Jason the Toymaker
The sun was so warm against your skin. You could stay there forever, stretched out on the grass and basking in the sunlight.
“It’s done,” your friend’s voice broke through your daydreaming
You opened your eyes and rolled over to see exactly what they had been working on for the entire trip. After realising the first few times that you weren’t going to get a reaction, you had decided to wait for them to finish working before you tried to have a conversation.
“I didn’t know you could draw,” you said. “That’s amazing.”
The hyper-realistic man was sketched to perfection with a top hat, a fur coat, and a small mouse sitting on his left shoulder. It felt like his eyes could piece into your soul.
“Who is that?” you asked them.
They stared blankly at the image and shook their head. “I don’t know,” they said. “He’s been in my dreams for so long. I think it has something to do with my amnesia. Maybe I knew him once before.”
“He’s a little intimidating,” you said. “I could imagine him to be a ringleader in a circus that’s like a secret cult. Maybe he’s why you lost your memory.”
“Maybe…” they said, tapping the picture. They suddenly shoved it into your chest and stood up. “You keep that. I don’t want it anywhere near me. I need to go talk to my parents.”
You watched them race out of the park in confusion. The man in the picture stared up at you with haunting eyes.
Folding it in half so it didn’t freak you out, you stood and dusted off your clothing. Maybe it would be best if you headed home. It was getting late either way.
Later on, you’d call your friend and check up on them.
About 10 minutes away from your house, the feeling of being watched snuck up on you. It hung heavily around your shoulders like a cloak. You glanced around but saw nobody.
Still, you didn’t feel comfortable leading whoever was following you back to your house. You made a point of walking amongst large crowds and headed for the police station.
They were watching you the whole way.
You sped up. A few people bumped into you and you apologised as best as you could. Your grip on the picture was getting tighter enough for you to tear it. The later it got, the fewer people were on the streets and so you were pretty much alone when you bumped into him.
It took you a few seconds to recognise the man from the drawing.
If you thought his drawn eyes were captivating, they had nothing on his real ones which glowed with an almost ethereal light.
“You’re him,” you breathed.
He stared at you, smile falling from his face in confusion. “Who?”
You shakily held out the drawing and he yanked it from your hands. “My friend drew that,” you explained. “They said that its of somebody from their past. They have amnesia you see.”
He was unmoving as he studied the picture. You began feeling a little uncomfortable and then his gaze snapped to you. “Is that so?” he asked.
You nodded and took a small step away from him. “Maybe you should go and talk to them? See –“ you swallowed nervously. “See if you can help them remember?”
“No need,” he said, dropping the paper on the ground. “Who are you?”
Your name came out as little more than a soft whisper. Something about the entire scenario made you uneasy. His appearance was too unnatural.
A gust of wind came by, picking up the drawing and whipping it away. You watched it go and when you looked back down, his eyes were locked on you.
“Such a pity,” he said. “You would have been the perfect doll.”
Wearily, you took a step backwards. His words made your stomach churn uneasily. “What are you talking about?”
He smiled. It was kind and warm but it only made you more nervous. His eyes looked like they had almost changed colour; shifted a shade darker than previously. “Thinking aloud my dear,” he said.
“About dolls?” you asked.
He tilted his head a little towards you. “I’m going to have to bid you goodbye. It seems I have other matters to attend to.” He brushed past you, stopping briefly when directly next to you. “Consider yourself lucky.”
He was gone before you could even spin around to face him.
Jeff the Killer
Pausing the song, you removed your earphones as quietly as possible and placed them down on your desk. According to the blinking numbers on your phone screen, it was nearing 2 AM. Far too late for anybody to make an excess of noise.
You listened closely. The music had been too loud for you to hear anything and you almost brushed the strange noise off as your sleep-deprived imagination. Until something squeaked like shoe soles on tiles.
In retrospect, you should have immediately called 911 but you didn’t want to sound a false alarm.
The light switch was thankfully directly outside your room. The hall illuminated most of the house when they were on and it steeled your nerves. Your roommate’s door was open, allowing you to confirm their sleeping state, curled up in their bed amongst the piles of mess. They had had to move to the spare room due to a faulty window earlier in the day and had clearly given up sorting items.
You glanced into the apartment’s other rooms before heading to the kitchen. There was nothing odd. The scuttling when you entered the kitchen just suggested that your neighbour’s rat infestation may be migrating.
Making a mental note to call the exterminator, you turned to switch off the kitchen light.
Something slammed into you, forcing your back to collide with a wall. A hand covered your mouth and the overwhelming scent of blood and decay invaded your nose. Something cold and sharp pressed against your neck.
“Shut up and stay still,” the man snarled at you. “I don’t think anybody will appreciate you getting blood in the kitchen.”
Your heart leapt into your throat and your body stilled. The man in front of you was terrifying. His skin pale and mutilated. Eyes far too wide for a normal person and dancing with an insanity that sent chills down your spine.
And his mouth… a bloody smile carved across his face, stretching halfway to his ears.
He studied your face carefully and his expression twisted. “You’re not the right one,” he snapped. The knife moved away from your neck, so he could point with it. “I had this all planned and yet when I came into that room, I found it empty. Why?”
Even if he hadn’t been holding your mouth shut, you doubted you would have been able to formulate an answer. The pounding heartbeat in your ears was nearly blocking out his voice.
He lightly tapped your cheek with his knife. “Not that it matters,” he said. “I’ll just have to adapt my original plan. You’re not the right target but I’m a huge fan of collateral damage.”
A small whimper escaped you and tears welled at your eyes. You didn’t want to die.
“Don’t blubber!” he ordered. “View it as a good thing. You’ll be all over the news. Another victim of Jeff the Killer. Hell, you might even be added to a Wikipedia page or something.”
You could recall that name from the news. Often followed by a lengthy list of deaths and the police chief begging for any information about the murderer.
Jeff stared at you for a long minute before he pressed the knife’s blade to your throat and moved his hand away from your mouth. “Scream and I will remove your vocal cords,” he threatened. “Who are you?”
It took several deep breaths and a flicker of impatience in his expression to give you the ability to talk again. You stammered out your full name as quickly as you possibly could.
He rolled his eyes and tilted the knife so it scratched your skin. A sticky and warm substance ran down your throat in small droplets. “Pathetic.”
“Sorry,” you whispered on instinct. “Please don’t kill me.”
“Why not?” he asked. “You ruined my earlier plans to take out my original target by interrupting me before I could find them. Why shouldn’t I settle for you instead?”
You didn’t have an answer.
He took the blade away from your throat. “If you call the police and report what happened here tonight, I will slice you into little pieces.”
It was almost twenty minutes after he left before you regained any movement in your body. You slumped into a heap on the kitchen floor and started sobbing.
Kagekao
Things had been going missing around your house.
Initially, you had thought it was just due to you forgetting where you’d plopped things because it was simple things. Drinks that vanished, keys turning up on the opposite side of the house, and random spills that you didn’t remember making.
But then it started getting weirder still.
You would make food and pack it away, knowing that you would eat it later, and find it gone. Picture frames disappeared, never to be seen again. Your rug half-unraveled during the night and you found it in a pile the next morning. A candle in your bathroom fell over and, somehow, the curtains on the other side of the house had caught alight.
It was suspicious, to say the very least. You began to think that you had some kind of intruder – once, the news reported that a woman found a homeless man living in her attic and eating her food when she wasn’t looking.
So you went out and bought cameras, setting them up throughout your house.
For two weeks, they caught nothing until one of them ended up breaking. You went to get it repaired and the company managed to recover what it had last seen. Which was nothing on your first glance.
But you were soon to realise, that was only because you had been looking at the floor.
While you were rewatching when you got home, you noticed something. The window was sitting wide open and the camera’s angle only allowed you to see half of it. Right toward the end of the feed, a gloved hand appeared on the side of the window and a slight shadow indicated something climbing through.
So you got reinforced windows and made sure that none were open unless you were in the room.
Things still continued happening.
You were beginning to get really annoyed by this. It was tempting to go to the police and let them just handle it but that was going to be a lot of effort that you really didn’t care for. You didn’t feel like you were in much danger. Nothing had happened in your bedroom.
Your next plan was to set up a trap of some kind. With a hidden camera set up, you made extra food and left it on the counter to see if something happened.
The next day, you watched as a plastic toy of some kind was thrown directly into the plate from somewhere off-camera, breaking it and leaving an absolute mess everywhere.
Still not considering it to be anything dangerous, you just cleaned up the mess and loudly cursed out anybody who was listening. You stalked the house after that, searching every nook and cranny with a bat in hand. The final place was the closet in your bedroom and you peered in, expecting nothing.
When you turned around though, you spotted something sitting in the corner of the room.
It was humanoid with arms twisted into awkward positions and a mask on its face. Half the mask was black and the other white, both sides bearing an unnaturally smiling expression. The creature cackled when you saw it and scuttled out of the door, stuck to the roof the entire time.
A second passed.
Then another.
You pinched your arm hard and waited to wake up. Surely there was no way… I mean, why would… humans didn’t generally crawl along the ceiling? Well, you were quite sure they never did that. You must have been imagining it.
A second laugh corrected you on that.
You swallowed thickly, walked over to your door as calmly as possible and locked it. Then you took out your phone and finally called the police.
Kate the Chaser
The day when Kate was sent away remained very clear in your mind. It was a moment that brought extremely change to your life, mixing up your friend group and sending you in a different direction.
The years has passed and you had never gotten over your best friend. They said that she had lost her mind and you knew it was true. All those games investigating the woods and ghost hunting must have put a toll on her mind. Sometimes, you blamed yourself for all the pranks and you knew that Lauren had similar doubts.
And now she was back.
Lauren and you hadn’t remained close, the entire situation feeling too real with one another. Your greeting was stilted but neither of you wanted to be the first to approach the house.
“Do you think that she remembers us?” Lauren asked.
“If she didn’t then her mom wouldn’t have invited us over,” you said.
You stood in complete silence, staring up at the house. Would you even recognise Kate? The last time that you had seen her was when you were both young children and her face remained at that age in your memories.
Eventually, you gained your confidence before Lauren and you walked over, knocking on the door before anxiety could find you.
Kate answered the door and you forgot why you had ever been nervous.
Time had slimmed her face and shortened her hair. Her eyes were still a gentle brown and the cockiness had faded from her smile, but it was recognisable from your nostalgia. It made you feel warm and known – an aura that you had missed without even realising it.
“Hi,” you greeted.
Kate pulled you into a tight hug and you returned it, clutching at her tightly as though she could slip through your fingers. It really had been too long and when you moved away, she held onto Lauren with the same enthusiasm.
“How have you been?” she asked. “You have to tell me everything.”
The three of you spent the rest of the afternoon having tea and just talking about the world at large. Kate didn’t have many stories from the hospital – she claimed it was because the place had been extremely boring and neither of you pushed to find out more about it. Honestly, it was more comfortable to act as though she had simply moved away.
Lauren had to leave first and you were going to go with her but Kate had looked so down that you remained just a little longer. That was when things got weird.
“I’ve missed music a lot,” Kate sighed.
“Did they not allow you to listen to music?”
She grimaced. “No, they did but often I couldn’t hear it over the static. Its mostly gone away now but it came back last night… it fills my brain and all that I can think of is a way to make the pain stop.”
The colour drained from your face as you stared at her. You didn’t know much about what happened to her but you had thought she would be okay now.
Realising it, Kate hurried to reassure you, “I really have recovered,” she said. “My hallucinations have faded and my medication keeps my emotions in check. You really don’t have to be scared of me.”
You stared down at your cup awkwardly. “I’m not scared of you,” you reassured her. “You’ve never done anything to me.”
She nodded. “It will be alright, you’ll see. I’m ready to get back to a normal life with my friends and not have to worry about that ghost stuff ever again.”
Laughing Jack
It was on your leg…
The glare you fixed the small child with could wilt plants. It didn’t care though and merely clutched at your clothing with a happy smile. “Come play with me?” it asked. “I can introduce you to all my friends!”
“How old is she again?” you grumbled at your friend.
Your friend laughed and ruffled their cousin’s hair. “I had an imaginary friend when I was 10. She’s only 6, she’s still at the stage where they’re a big deal.”
The child was oblivious to your conversation and reached out her arms. “Come on. The parents are being boring. I have candy that my friend gave me. We can share it.”
“I agreed to come along to your family get together to keep you company,” you said to your friend. “You know I don’t like children. Babysitting really isn’t my forte.”
All you received for your complaining was laughter.
By the time you had the 4th teddy bear had been introduced, you were done. Why did one kid have so many toys?
“Now which one of your friends gives you candy?” your friend asked. “Because if it’s from Princess, I don’t think it’s edible. What if she secretly puts glitter in it?”
Expected to play along, you sighed. “Unless it’s glitter from rainbows because then it’s got magic powers and allows you to fly.”
The child liked your thumb-sucked statement because she jumped up in excitement. “I don’t get it from Princess. Jack gives it to me! But if Princess can make me fly, I want to have that kind of candy instead!”
“Which one’s Jack again?” you asked, eyeing the line of toys.
“He’s not here right now,” the child said, biting her inner cheek. She turned in a circle. “Sometimes he hides in the cupboard though!” She ran over to her cupboard and pulled the doors open. “I don’t think – OW!”
She reeled backwards, clutching her cheek. Both you and your friend immediately jumped up and ran over to her. A tiny slice mark ran across the side of her face. It wasn’t anything serious, but she was sobbing as though it would kill her. You presumed a small edge on one of the boxes in the cupboard had been the cause.
“Do you want me to take you to mom, so she can kiss it better?” your friend asked. “Your new best friend can wait here and make sure all your toys are safe.”
The child nodded, and she got led out of the room. You rolled your eyes at the sensitivity and reached into the cupboard to push the box out of the way. A clawed hand reached out of nowhere and grabbed your wrist tightly.
Before you could even shout, it lifted you off the ground by your arm and a second hand had wrapped around your mouth.
The monster’s body appeared out of the closet.
It was a clown. Easily 7ft tall and comprised of monochrome colours with a sharp, pointed nose and long, greasy hair. Its black lips spread into a smile, revealing pointed teeth and a sickeningly sweet breath.
You writhed against its grip, trying to scream or do anything but it was insanely strong, and it just laughed at your efforts.
“How mean,” it purred, leaning in close to your face. “You ask who I am and then, when I appear to you, you insult my appearance. Awful etiquette. Your parents should be concerned about how rude you are to strangers.”
You strained your memory to think about what you had been doing before it grabbed you but the adrenaline was clouding your mind. What had you asked? You struggled more with the lack of memories.
The clown shook its head. “I haven’t revealed myself to somebody so old in a long time. You should be flattered but instead you choose to try and kick me. This is why I don’t do this. Children are far more polite.”
He released you suddenly and you landed hard on the ground. It winked and disappeared, right as your friend and her cousin returned.
“You met Jack!” the child shouted excitedly, pointing to the candy lying next to you.
You shoved it away from you as quickly as possible.
187 notes · View notes
katwritessometimes · 4 years ago
Text
In The Dark
Tumblr media
Shadow Monster Aizawa x Reader
A collab piece for @lemonlordleah-shinzawa-kitten Citrus Dome Server
Read the other entries HERE
Warnings: somnophilia, dub-con, non-con, tetraphilia eeee tentaicles kind of? Monster fucking, manipulation, tiny little sprinkling of yandere if you squint. 
5kish words
 @bobawithpomegranate ​ & @miscellaneous-bnha ​ thanks for keeping me from jumping off a bridge. This was surprisingly very challenging to write so i hope you guys enjoy.
The sight of your grandmother’s old home brought comfort into your heart in a way nothing else ever could. It had taken much longer than you would have liked to get here, after almost a year of fighting with the family. Legal battles over property and inheritance, you'd finally been handed the keys to the beautiful old Victorian home your grandmother had loved so much. The outside was weathered but held strong, you were sure the inside would be worse after being empty and neglected for so long. With a sigh, you picked up the cleaning supplies you'd brought with you and made your way inside the house. 
You don't notice it at first,
 He’d noticed you the second you walked onto the porch. 
Singing softly to yourself, you make your way through the old house, flipping lights on to make sure the electricity works. Opening up windows and doors to air the dusty old place out. Except once you set your mind to cleaning it becomes blatantly obvious. The house isn't dusty, the house is fairly clean, no dust having settled anywhere, no cobwebs hanging in abandoned corners. You think for a second maybe the lawyer hired someone to come clean before handing over the keys, but you don't recall her mentioning anything like that. 
With a shrug determined to do some light cleaning anyway, you spend the day unpacking some of the stuff you brought and lightly cleaning as you went. The first time you notice it it’s dark out, dim lights illuminating the house. Christ, why did grandma have such shitty lightbulbs in, you’d think an older woman would want brighter lights as her vision faded. The thought slips from you when you hear something crash onto the floor behind you. You turn quickly, something flinting in the corner of your eye as you turn, heart rate spiking, and you freeze. You were sure you saw something going up the stairs. 
Taking a breath in an attempt to calm your breathing, you pick up the painting that had somehow been knocked off its mount. A creaking coming from the second floor has your head snap in that direction. It’s an old house, you chant in your head trying to not let yourself get worked up. You don’t realize you're making your way up the stairs until the old wood creaks loudly under your weight. Your attention is drawn to your grandmother’s room, the only place you haven't been in just yet. You dig around your pocket for the master key that gave you access into the main bedroom, worried that maybe this is where all the dust and cobwebs had scampered off too. You chuckle to yourself at that and it settles your nerves a little, though you can't pinpoint why you're suddenly nervous. 
Much to your surprise, your grandmother’s old bedroom was just as clean as the rest of the house had been, even though no one should have been able to access it. You almost miss the small box sitting on her bed if not for something skittering in the corner of your eyes turning your attention to it. You do miss the shadow that slinks out behind you pausing at the doorway to watch you for a second. You reach out for the ornate box, a letter sitting on top of it with your name written neatly on the front. But before your fingers can make contact with it, the door behind you slams loudly. You jump at the sound, hands coming up to clutch at your chest, curses spilling from your lips as you turn to see the door is closed now. 
“Fucking old house” You yell aloud unable to control your volume after having been spooked. Your yelling makes you miss the deep chuckle that rings out in the air. 
Cute
You pout upset that you’d let yourself be so easily spooked like that. Running a hand through your hair you turn your attention back to the small box and letter picking up both items before heading out of the bedroom. You look back one last time, unsure if you felt ready to disturb your grandmother’s space just yet. Opting to leave it as it was, if only for a little while longer. 
You probably should have read the letter too, things would have made sense much quicker if you had. 
Two weeks of dusting and cleaning out old boxes before you decided it was time to begin moving your things into the house. It had been slightly odd, something for sure was off about the house but you tried not to think about it too much. Handling most of the weird mishaps in the house with a shrug and no real inclination to question it. The last thing that came with you into the new house was your two cats. A sleek black tom who loves you and only you, and a younger larger orange tom who’s all around very friendly. You hate to say you notice a shift in the house when the cats finally settle. Both the boys took to the house as if they’d always been there, something you were struggling with. It was their presence that made it so that you could no longer pretend like you didn’t see the shadows moving. 
Both cats who’d always preferred lazing in sun rays suddenly preferred the dark corners of the living room over the sunny rays leaking in through the large bay window in the house. Demanding meow’s typically indicative of wanting attention, were used in dark corners of the house. Directed at something you couldn’t see. You’d be able to ignore the behavior, except every time you went looking for them when they called. 
You’d find them happily purring, rubbing up against something that wasn't there in the darkness, as if already being given the attention they were asking for. It was creepy, weird, should have creeped you out. But you’d been raised to have a healthy fear and respect towards things you couldn't understand but were not outright malicious. So you tried not to let it bother you too much, don't question the way shadows seem to move. Or when the cats' purr and flop on their backs for tummy scratches in the dark corners of the house.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The dreams had begun the first night at the house, an all-encompassing warmth that lazily spreads throughout your whole body. Contrasted by cold hands caressing your skin, a deep rich voice whispering dirty things in your ear and working you up to a feverish pitch. 
“Pretty little mouse wandering into my house”  the voice coos in your ear.
And then you’re awake, panting heavily, a groan spilling past your lips as you toss and turn a little in your bed. 
“Fuck.” you whimper out, bringing your arm up over your face as you try and catch your breath. 
 You can’t remember exactly what you dreamt about, only the deep voice murmuring nothings in your ear and cold fingers playing with your folds. You let out an exasperated sigh squirming in bed frustration seeping into your bones. When was the last time you had a dream like that, you couldn't remember? When was the last time you’d been worked up like this, and from a dream no less? You let out a frustrated huff turning and burying your face in the pillow. You could have sworn you heard a deep chuckle ring out. 
They get more detailed, more vivid the longer you're at the house you're almost used to waking up panting and sweaty. The feeling of cool silky tendrils exploring your body lingering for a bit before slinking off as you become more alert. Groggily whining at being awake after dreaming such filthy things. The feeling of your wetness soaking through your panties frustrating you. Always waking up right before the best part of the dream, so you throw the blankets off of yourself in a huff. Spreading your legs wide you trail your fingers over the lingering sensation of someone else’s touch. 
It drives him wild.
Aizawa was on the edge of insanity when you showed up at the old house. A year of solitude will do that to you, he'd been beyond madness when the old lady bought the house all those years ago. Though she's brought him back with a soft kindness only a grandmother could offer.
You,
You brought a clarity to his mind in a different way. Every little curse, every time you scold the house when something disappears. Every time you touched yourself to thoughts of him, to the lingering feeling of his tendrils and hands on you. Aizawa was able to pull himself little by little out of the pit insanity and loneliness had pulled him into. You were so easy too, subconsciously letting the shadow creature infect every ounce of your being. He'd managed to seep into your dreams easily enough, a lonely pent up girl. He liked how you squirmed in your sleep. 
Desperate little whimpers spilling from your lips as his cool fingers explore your body. It was addicting, the way your warmth spread through him with every touch, every explorative lick of your body lighting a fire deep in Aizawa's belly. 
“Pretty little thing aren't you.” Aizawa coos in your ear, and you always react so beautifully to his voice. Your sleeping body responding with a soft whimper, he lets his tendrils explore every inch of you. Slipping underneath the silk PJ top and skimpy little shorts you always wore to bed. You were practically offering yourself up to him each and every night. How could he ever resist when your body reacted like this to his every touch. He’d started slowly at first, only manifesting his tendrils to creep along your body as you slept. 
Once you’d been there for a few months he didn’t even have to worry about you waking up. Having invaded your dreams enough to be able to keep you in a nice deep sleep while he had his way with you. Settling himself between your legs fully manifested, never happier to have this solid form as when he's trailing large callus palms up to your soft legs. It’s so easy, really he can’t help himself, your wetness quickly soaking through your panties as cold fingers rub at your clit. Heady little moans spilling from your sleeping frame and it makes him giddy, trailing a large hand up and under your shirt. Pressing against the soft skin of your stomach and trailing up to gently squeeze at your breasts. Aizawa loves the way your body reacts to him, whimpering and arching against his touch. He shifts then, leaning over your sleeping body, caging your head between his hands, leaning down to nuzzle his nose into your hair.
Can’t help himself as he trails open mouth kisses down your neck, tangling his fingers through your hair, you lean into his touch. A soft whimper of please slips through your lips and Aizawa can barely contain himself as his hips buck against your core. 
“Begging for me in your sleep, sweet girl, already knows who she belongs to. Don’t you.”  
You mewl, a soft pretty sound that Aizawa plays in his head over and over for days. Humping into your soaked panty-clad pussy desperately. His tendrils emerging from his back of their own accord, stroking and rubbing up against you as he mindlessly pleasures himself against your unconscious frame. Your little pants and moans edging him on until he's groaning against your neck, spilling himself onto your cute little silk PJ shorts. Aizawa lets himself bask in the feeling of your warmth against him littering your face in kisses. 
“My good girl.” 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You conclude something is living in the house one night during an intense thunderstorm. Living in a house with some creature that may or may not try to eat you? Cool fine, no worries. But a thunderstorm? The loud unpredictable booms that tear through the air make you jump every single time without fail. 
You flinch, once again roused by a loud clap of thunder and a harsh flash of lightning. An involuntary whimper slipping past your lips as you curl up into a ball on the bed doing your best to block out the noise of the raging storm. 
You can feel it when a cool blanket envelopes you, a shift in the air that muffles all of the intense noise. The feeling of something carding its fingers through your hair comes next, ever so lightly scratching at your scalp. “It’s just a storm” A deep voice that seems to come from all around whispers and a strange comfort washes over you as your body begins to relax. You're half asleep, it's easy to lean into the gentle caress when you're not quite awake. Easy to ignore the feeling of tendrils creeping across your legs and stomach. You can't help but feel slightly comforted by them in your half-asleep state. 
 An exceptionally loud clap of thunder jolts you into a more awake state and you shoot up in bed. The hazy fog that was keeping you calm dispelling and you whimper as the comfort leaves you. “Please don't leave” you whisper aloud unsure to who or why you even spoke. A deep voice coos at you as thunderclaps outside again and you tremble. A yelp slips past your lips and your hands reach out towards the deep voice as if on instinct. Something safe that will soothe you if only you can reach out and touch it.
 A chuckle thick like honey floats into your ears and your hands meet something soft. You're groggy, half asleep, and confident you're just imagining things, but that doesn't take away from the comfort. It feels like a million different arms wrap around you, pulling you in towards something solid and the hazy fog returns your body relaxing as the tendrils tighten almost uncomfortably around you. Wrapping you up in a cocoon that feels safe and secure, the thunderstorm outside fading into the background and all you can concentrate on is the deep voice mumbling nothings in your ear. 
It's in the days after the storm when you can still hear his deep voice in your ears and feel his warm touch lingering on your body. That you remember the letter and box your grandmother had left you. You feel a little stupid for not thinking of reading them earlier, having been caught up in the whirlwind of moving you'd put them off to the side and almost forgotten entirely about them 
To my lovely granddaughter, 
If you’re reading this then it means you've agreed to the stipulations I included for ownership of the house. This place is special, and if you take care of the house its caretaker will return the favor. Be patient with him, it takes him a little while to warm up but he won't hurt you. I promise I haven't gone crazy with old age. Allow yourself to be open to the things in life we can’t explain. I hope the house is as good to you as it was to me in my old age. 
It doesn’t explain much, but coming from a family that believed in the supernatural made it so that your grandmother's cryptic words didn't freak you out as much as they should have. They made you feel better actually, soothed the part of you that was nervous you might be going crazy. The small box held a pendant, a small but brilliant ruby ordaining the center of it delicate but practical enough for daily wear. You can't help but slip it on and admire the pretty jewel. 
Aizawa is more active after that, the haze in his mind settles when he sees you wearing his necklace. You notice it too, the shadows in the house somehow softening, almost playful. He likes to move your things around so he can hear you huff in frustration. Every curse every time you yell at him, the fog in his mind clears.
He gets bolder around the house, slowly but surely, starts moving things around more obviously. Enjoys making you jump by slithering his tendrils across your ankles while you're cooking. Or shutting off the lights while you shower just to hear your cute little yelp. He likes that you’re somehow not scared of his presence but still easily spooked overall. 
“That foundation was $50 and if it's not back in my makeup bag when I come back I swear to god I'll keep all the lights on for a week.” You see the shadow swirl in the corner of the bathroom, and you know it's smiling at you. You roll your eyes but the next morning your foundation is sitting right on the bathroom sink. 
You begin to catch glimpses of it, of him. As if your attention is helping him manifest fully after a long time of being nothing but a wisp of smoke. Most obvious when your eyes scan the house and you can almost swear a man is petting one of your cats. Only to double back and see your cat rolling over against a dark corner of the room. You almost stop feeling uneasy, almost. 
It all comes to head on a night where sleep seems unreachable. You were frustrated, panting, skin warm, and sticky with sweat as your fingers skillfully circled your clit but no relief came. You let out a frustrated ‘fuck’ throwing your head back onto the pillow and tossing a hand over your face. You’d been pent up for a while now, the weird lewd dreams working you up but never getting you anywhere. You do your best to relax into the bed, accepting defeat with a groan and hoping sleep overtakes you quickly. 
The feeling of something wisping against your ankles brings you back from the edge of sleep. Cool ever so soft touches trail up your legs, you shiver at the cold sensation against your still warm and sweaty skin. Your eyes flutter open but you're only met with black, body tensing a little as cold tendrils stroke your face. 
“You’re ok little one.” The voice is deep against your ear, a cold forked tongue licking up the side of your cheek. “I’ve got you” The same soothing voice you’d heard during the thunderstorm. Except for this time, it's laced with something other than softness. “I’ve been watching you, little human. Spreading yourself open shamelessly, playing with that pretty pussy out in the open. Pretending like you didn’t know I was here to watch.” Aizawa coos.
You whimper at the words, mist curling around you as a dark chuckle fills the room. “Tease” he snarls in your ear and you can’t help yourself as your hips buck up at the sound. Something solid forms between your legs, the soft smooth thing wraps around your ankles assisting in spreading your legs out wide. The deep voice tsks against your ear, cold skin and stubble rubbing against your cheek “You could at least pretend like you're not enjoying this.” 
Your face flushes as he teases you, the sensation of his foreign appendages exploring your body exciting you in a way you can't quite place. They’re not hands that much you can tell, you can distinguish his hands by the callus texture as he strokes a thumb over one of your nipples. Tweaking at it gently until it perks against his fingers. 
“Aren’t you scared little mouse” you can feel his tongue lapping at your neck, sharp teeth pricking the skin there and you let out a whimper. Managing only to shake your head, arching your chest up into his touch as he plays with you. “Desperate little human, willing to take just about anything if it means being satisfied.” You choke out a protest but can’t help the soft moan that bubbles out of your mouth as Aizawa presses his thigh against your sex. He coos into your ear when you begin to hump him mindlessly. 
“Such simple little creatures humans. Driven by desire, and willing to fuck just about anything aren't you little one?” You shake your head in protest, but the excitement pooling in your belly betrays you. Aizawa chuckles and pulls away from you a little, tendrils pooling from him and eagerly joining the fray. The limbs have a mind of their own, each appendage going about playing with you in different ways. One replaces his hands, squeezing and pinching at your breasts. Another brings your hands up and holds them above you keeping you still with minimal effort. A few others explore your body and Aizawa watches, as one of his appendages eagerly begins tugging aside your cute little PJ bottoms. 
You whine out a “No” as the cold air hits your soaked entrance “That's not what your pretty little pussy is telling me.” Aizawa chuckles watching as the tendrils gather your juices up, gently circling your clit and parting your folds. “Look at you, soaked and ready for me aren't you.” His hand replaces the tendril and you feel cold fingers press into your heat. Your pussy clenches at the intrusion but you buck into him automatically. Already worked up from playing with yourself before, your body betrays you as your mind hazes and all you can think about is pleasure. 
“P-Please” You choke out tugging against the restraints that only tighten when you struggle. Aizawa cocks an eyebrow up at you as he leans down, nuzzling at your inner thigh. Tongue lapping at the juices running down between your supple ass. He hums when you beg a smile tugging at his lips, his fog finally taking hold of you. 
“What was that little mouse? Did you say something” He accentuates his words with another finger and you cry out as he finger fucks you. His tongue lazily licking at the edges of your pussy and then up to rub at your clit. You whine, hips bucking up and Aizawa sighs another tendril coming to wrap around your waist and pins you to the bed. 
“Be still, or I'll leave you here.” You freeze at that babbling for him not to leave you and settle your hips. The appendage keeps you still squeezing you just a little too tight. 
“That's a good girl.” Aizawa hums, turning his attention back to your core. “You look so pretty like this baby girl, spread out for me to do whatever I want. You just keep giving me those pretty little noises and I'll make you feel good, okay?” You moan in response and Aizawa clicks his tongue, the tendril circling your stomach squeezing until it hurts. “Let me hear you say it.” Aizawa snarls. 
You gasp as pain seeps into your pleasure “Yes, please I'll be good.” The pressure against your sides loosens and you're able to breathe again panting softly as the pain begins to fade. Aizawa doesn't say anything, pulling his fingers out of you and bringing them up for a taste. He hums satisfied and then he's moving your body. Positioning you onto your stomach, cold hands lifting your ass as he positions you just how he wants. His tendrils keep your arms together in front of you, stripping you of your PJs and keeping your legs spread just enough to give Aizawa the perfect view of your ass and dripping pussy. A smile, just a bit too wide spills over his lips as he settles himself between your legs. Aizawa is hard, painfully so but he takes his time sliding a hand over the curve of your asscheeks. Trailing down your back and up to the back of your neck, squeezing gently before trailing back again.
 With a hum, he lazily strokes your dripping folds, cooing as you press your ass back into him wiggling a little desperate for him to fill you. A harsh smack rings out as his palm connects with your ass “Patience little mouse.” He snarls leaning down to the opposite cheek and biting down just a little too hard. You cry out, tears pooling in your eyes and you bury your head into the pillow. Mind overcome by a lustful haze, you just want him to fuck you already. 
Your wish comes soon enough when you feel something thick prodding at your entrance. You gasp as the tip of Aizawa’s cock penetrates you, gasp turns into a desperate moan as he presses into you little by little. He lets out a deep guttural moan of his own as your warmth encircles him, greedily squeezing his cock. Your warmth is addicting and it doesn’t take too long for Aizawa to start bucking into you. He sets a brutal pace, the appendages holding your waist upkeep you still, nice and steady for him to fuck into while his hands explore your body. 
You curse desperate little moans and obscenities leaving your lips as he fucks into you. His cock stretches you to your limits, almost painful as the creature fucks into you desperately. There's a shift, and you feel his hands come up to your middle, pulling you up against his chest as he fucks you. You feel his face nuzzle against your cheek as one of his hands coming to rest against your belly as he fucks you. You hands are suddenly free and you reach up, feeling your fingers pass through a cool mist, before finding something solid. Soft wisps of something, that wrap around your fingers, rolling over them in waves as you entwine them into what you assume is his hair. 
“Such a good girl, you take me so well darling. Letting me fuck into your womb like this.” Aizawa presses his hand against your stomach pushing back on himself as he becomes desperate. 
“Wanna see” The words are a desperate whine and you don't even really register when you say them. Aizawa sputters a little pace wavering at your words. His fingers brush against the delicate necklace you wear his necklace, and for a second his mind clears. But you whimper a desperate sound that breaks whatever sliver clarity he'd found and a darkness takes over his features again. His fingers abandon the necklace and trail up to your neck fingers wrapping around it then squeezing.
“What was that you little slut.” He snarls in your ear and you can't help yourself as you cry out 
“Please, wanna see you, wanna watch your cock fuck into me.” Your face flushes as you admit this out loud. A growl coming from the man, thing currently fucking your brains out and you can't do anything but tug at his hair and lean into him further as he uses you. Aizawa stills a little, and you whine desperately doing your best to bounce on his cock as he stops moving. Suddenly you can see again and he's fucking into you, go to say something but you see it, a black wispy tentacle like thing appears in front of your face. Aizawa’s hand that was wrapped snugly around your neck comes up to squeeze your cheeks and the appendage gives you a cheeky little wave before filling your mouth. 
“Wanna watch yourself get stuffed, fine, we'll use all of your cute little holes. How does that sound little one.” You whine around the tentacle and then he’s picking up his pace. Hand squeezing your throat so he can feel it at his tendril fucks into your neck, you take him so well. This is it the broken part of his brain hisses she's the one. Aizawa shakes his head, the feeling of your fingers in his hair grounding him for a moment and presses your body back into the mattress. 
His movements turn erratic as he fucks into your overwhelmingly tight little pussy. Pretty little moans spilling from you as he fucks you and his tentacles play with your clit and throat. You take him so well, respond so beautifully to his touch, you weren't scared and accepted your place quickly. He brings his fingers up to the little nub between your legs, replacing his tendrils and pressing fast little circles against your already abused clit. It doesn't take long after that, your body presses into the mattress, a tentacle fucking your throat, and some creature’s cock kissing at your cervix the thought alone is too much. But you spill over when Aizawa’s teeth sink into your neck, your body spasming as your orgasm bubbles over. 
Aizawa grunts from above you, your body going limp as he bites into you fucking you through your orgasm and chasing his own using your spent body for his own pleasure. He spills in you soon after, his mind just a little bit hazy. Ever so gently Aizawa pulls his tendril out of your mouth, drool, and his own slick trailing from your mouth as he does so. He coos as you whimper, pressing a hand over your ass to admire the way your pussy stretched to accommodate him. Humping into you a few more times before he pulls away completely. He debates for a moment letting himself disappear back into the shadows, but he hasn't been this real, this solid in so long. 
Your whimpering slices through his thoughts and before he can stop you, you're on your back looking up at him. Instinct makes him retract all of his extra limbs, making himself look half normal minus the wisps of hair that always seem to move on their own. You blink up at him for a moment body sore but satisfied and you bring your arms up to him. Aizawa is unsure, body flickering into shadows but you speak up before he can fully dissipate. 
“Stay with me” You manage to croak out, throat a little sore from the abuse you endured. You weren’t scared of him, if anything he was handsome and he'd fucked you till you were satisfied. You see the hint of hesitation in his eyes but you crinkle your nose and tilt your head cutely making grabby hands at him and he can’t help himself. 
Aizawa lays down and you curl into him on instinct, his body now warm against yours. Your fingers find their way up to his hair, giggling as the locks lace themselves with your fingers. He brushes some of your hair back and you whine as he touches at your neck. Small bits of blood pooling where he’d sunk his teeth into you. His split tongue peaks out automatically, licking it up and gently lapping at the tender spot on your neck as you whimper. 
“I get a little nuts when I'm on my own.” it's an apology, and you don’t think about why you feel safe in his arms, or why you don't question the creature laying with you, why you're not scared. Instead, you hum softly, nuzzling yourself into the crook of his neck as Aizawa lazily runs a steadily cooling hand down your back. 
“It's ok, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere.” You hear yourself say and he hums into your hair acknowledging your words. A twisted smile creeping its way onto his lips as his grip tightens around you. The part of Shouta that’s fallen too deep into insanity to come back fully snickers at your words. 
As if you had a choice. 
Tags:
@bbygirlpastel @thewheezingwyvern
2K notes · View notes
babykatsu · 4 years ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PAIRING: katsuki bakugou x gn!reader
RATING: nsfw
WARNINGS: jealous bakugou, sexual implications (no full on smut), kinda fluff?, strong language, aged-up of course
REQUEST: @anniebromberg tysmm for requesting<3 here’s a lil jealous bakugou fic!! it was really fun to finally write again. i really hope u like it <3 🤲🏻
WORDCOUNT: 1.6k
Tumblr media
SYNPOSIS:
Katsuki, your boyfriend, made sure EVERYONE knew that you were his. Well, for the most part at least. He was not one for PDA since he still liked his privacy. You know, some things are better left just for the two of you to enjoy behind the scenes. But this habit of his led to something else... So when you were both out for a short coffee date that you had somehow managed to arrange amidst your busy schedules, Katsuki was beyond fuming to see an extra trying to flirt with you.
Tumblr media
The smell of roasted coffee beans filled your nose as your boyfriend gently opened the door to the cafe you frequented. The rich bitter fragrance, with a hint of its inviting warmth, filled the atmosphere. It made your mouth water and yearn for that creamy, smooth drink. The subtle chatter of the customers, the clinking of cups, and other cutlery gently grazed your hearing. Nostalgic. That was the best way to put how you felt right now. It took you back to your first date with Katsuki, and though he will never admit it, this exact coffee shop is his favorite date spot. The subtle way his hand slipped out from yours as you two approached the counter interrupted your train of thought.
"Katsuki?" You questioned.
"I'll be back. I need to go to the toilet real quick. Don't order without me, okay?"
"Of course!"
With that, he shuffled his way through a couple of people before disappearing out of your vision. Awkwardly, you made your way off to the side elsewhere. In your little corner of the shop, you eyed people regularly coming in and out of the cafe. Admittedly, aimlessly standing there observing people was a tad bit uncomfortable and honestly creepy, but you knew Katsuki wouldn't take long. Well, you hoped so, at least.
Your solitude, however, did not last long. It took barely a couple of minutes before one of the people who had entered the establishment locked their eyes with yours. Not only did they maintain their gaze on you, but they even began making their way to you. In embarrassment, you glanced off to the side, eyes glued to where you last saw Katsuki go, awaiting to see his familiar face in the masses. To your disappointment, he wasn't there. And now this stranger was right next to you.
"waiting for your order, sweetheart?" A scratchy husk voice questioned, nudging their shoulder to yours almost in a joking manner. You didn't take lightly to the friendly gesture, feeling somewhat violated by the invasion of personal space.
"I haven't ordered yet" You smiled briskly, finally facing the person beside you. Your response only acted as an open invitation for this complete randomer to get even closer, their hand slithering around your waist.
"How about I buy you a drink, darling? How does that sound?" Though you tried to budge, it felt as though it only made the stranger cling to you tighter. 
As your heart drummed against your chest, you pleaded for Katsuki to get back soon. And to your delight, you heard his familiar voice as he obnoxiously cleared his throat.
The man's seemingly tight grasp on you loosened, taking a few steps back from you as he glanced back at your boyfriend.
"You with them?" The stranger asked, seemingly anxious. It didn't take long until Katsuki interlocked his fingers with yours, palms sweaty and his grip firm.
"The fuck do you think, dumbass?"
You knew Bakugou wanted to raise his voice, but you saw his restraint.  He was clenching his jaw as he spoke through gritted teeth. And worst of all, you could see the hazy distress in his eyes as he stared down at the man in front of him. Perhaps he was holding back to save you the humiliation of causing a stir in your favorite cafe, or maybe this was his breaking point. You never really knew what went through Katsuki's head, but the defeat you sensed come from him had you worried.
"Stop just looking at me and fuck off already." Katsuki spat out before dragging you out of the coffee shop.
Oddly enough, you'd think him aggressively yelling would depict his frustration more. Only, in this case, his silence was deafening. He marched around Tokyo's streets as you delayed behind him, his hand refusing to let go of yours
"Katsuki! Hold on!" You just barely let out. "We are going home." He spoke bluntly. "Do you not have to be back to work in 20 minutes?" With a frustrated sigh escaping his parted lips, he came to a halt.
"Then can we hurry up and get home, y/n?" Facing you, he spoke in a beaten tone.
He squeezed your hand tighter in reassurance before resuming his stride, only this time walking at a more manageable pace for you to keep up.
"You know I hate it when those extras try and talk to you. It's my fault for leaving you alone." He avoided eye contact as he stared up ahead, his car coming into view.
"And I know it's not your fault that dumbasses like that approach you but it still frustrates me, you know. Like, at least if you're with me, the bare minimum I could do is make sure those jerks know their place."
You always knew he was protective over you, usually never hesitating to bark out at those who tried to approach you, yet this time was different. This time felt like he was fed up beyond recognition. A random stranger flirting with you interrupted the date you two had managed to arrange after weeks of not having any alone time.
"Please don't stress yourself over that, baby! I promise you don't have to worry. I don't want anyone but you." You reassured, encircling yourself around his arm. Pulling out his car keys, you heard the familiar chime of his car unlocking.
"I know. It's still gonna annoy me nonetheless, though. How fucking hard is it for them to understand that you're mine and not theirs?"
Swiftly, he lowered you into the car seat as you unhooked yourself from his arm. You waited as he rounded the car, taking his seat next to you. Dropping his head back, he let out another frustrated sigh.
You didn’t know how exactly to break this tension that was between you two. You clasped his hand before saying the only thing that you knew that Katsuki could never turn down.
"Then make sure they know I'm yours." you challenged with a slight grin on your face.
He raised a brow at you, doubtingly but regardless, you could see him try and contain the smile that was growing in his face.
"Do you really want to challenge me to that?" His face lit up as he tilted it towards you.
"You have 15 minutes before you have to be back at work. Do your best-" But before you could fully complete your sentence, his lips had already fallen on yours. This wasn’t exactly the way you expected him to accept your challenge. But how could you deny him?
"I'll make sure everyone knows who you fucking belong to, darling." His breath trickled down your neck as he nibbled at your ear, causing goosebumps to dance down your skin. Butterflies swarmed your stomach as you began to feel excited for what he would do next.
His silky lips glided against every inch of  exposed skin and his hands didn't hesitate to caress everything his lips couldn't reach.  Lightly, he raised his head once more, his darkened crimson eyes peering at you with his signature stare. Gaze dipping lower down your face, he studied your lips, glazed in his previous embrace.
His plump mouth reconnected with yours, gently melting against you. The taste of caramel dripping from his tongue as it swiped your bottom lip. You savored every taste of him, granting him access. Delicate yet rough, he readily explored your mouth. Whirling his tongue around yours, before pulling away to tug at your lip. From gently pecks, to deep french kisses, he kept you guessing every time he leaned back in. And he continued to devour you, breathlessly pressing further into you as he only ventured you further. His hands crawling up your shirt, kneading your waist as he drove his chest towards yours. There was no space left between you two. The thrashing of his heart more noticeable than ever, you felt the adrenaline that ran around his body similarly to your own. Breathless, he parted from you. His cheeks scattered in a pink shimmer as his chest rose up and down as he panted for air.
"Hope on" He motioned to his lap.
And you did just that, throwing one leg over and repositioning yourself to rest above him.
His hands resumed their adventure, leisurely inching up your thighs as his thumbs rubbed in circles. Higher and higher Katsuki's hands reached, and you grew more feverish by the moment. Eyes fluttering to his lips and next down his body, you felt the pit of your stomach lust in anticipation and nervousness.
"Don't tease me now! You know we don't have time" You whined, rocking yourself against him before leaning in to meet his lips. But, he yanked away.
"Say please" He tipped his head, a taunting grin plastered across his face. You couldn't help but feel yourself get warm at his words, a drop of embarrassment streaming through you.
"P-please" You somewhat stammered, but Bakugou adhered to his word, cupping your face and drawing you back towards himself.
His hands slipped up your back, chilly fingers hovering just above your skin as they traced up and down the ridges of your spine. But these more satiny touches soon turned desperate once more. You were met by the clawing of his nails against your back. Down, his lips crept to your neck where he resumed his caresses. Gentle squirms and cries hung from your lips as you felt every lick his cushiony tongue made, every moment his teeth immersed into your skin, and every kiss he settled thereafter. There was no doubt he had left marks and it excited your body all over as you heaved for air. Tugging yourself to him, he bucked his hips up causing a groan to leave him, his breath lingering softly as it cascaded across the back of your neck. The feeling of his hardened cock leaving you craving for more.
But before you continue your endeavor, the sound of an alarm broke you from one another. Bakugou reached for his phone before being greeted with the message he wanted to see the least right now.
'work starts in 3 minutes'
This only meant you'd have to continue what you two had started after work, which only riled you two on more.
“I’ll finish you off at home. Got it?”
410 notes · View notes
anntoldst0ries · 4 years ago
Text
None shall sleep (Ethan x MC)
Book: Open Heart 3, post Chapter 5 Pairing: Dr Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr Noelle Valentine) Word Count/Rating: ~1.8k, T Summary: In the privacy of the diagnostic's office, Ethan & Noelle reflect on recent changes around them. Category/Warnings: Fluff, None Trope: And there was a bit of Hurt/Comfort
A/N: This chapter reminded me of things that have never been addressed... so this is a story of how things left unsaid all collided in my head. Hope you enjoy.
Also - yes, Ethan Ramsey can sing arias. Is anyone still truly surprised by the fact that this guy can do anything?
Tumblr media
There is something mesmerizing about watching the lights of day go out, overpowered by darkness, ablaze with colours - from the depths of blue, through indigo, navy and all the way to pitch-black.
About how, in a sense, it washes away all the bothers and allows you to start anew with the next rise of the almighty sun.
Ethan Ramsey was hoping for this exactly, maybe more than ever, but all the signs showed it wasn’t in the cards for him.
Or at least not today.
He stared into the void, interwoven by occasional human figures passing by through the front lobby. No voices of the day were able to reach him on the 7th floor of his kingdom. Behind the glass wall, he was almost in a different world.
It had been yet another day that brought him more gritted teeth, holding himself back and resigned sighs, than actual satisfaction from helping those who counted on him. All these ‘activities’ were not only annoying but also highly energy-consuming.
Bringing the index and middle fingertips to his pulsating temples, he started to compress and massage them in small circles, trying to soothe the pounding inside his skull. He could hear the blood rushing through the highways of his veins, the sound almost drowning out all external stimuli.
But there were certain sounds his expert ear was trained on, the ones he would’ve recognized even in his sleep.
Like the one reaching his ears right now, the sound of the door handle being pressed.
With his back facing the door, he couldn’t see who was trying to impose on his much-needed solitude. But since the unexpected guest did not precede their ministrations by knocking, the possibilities narrowed down significantly. There were only two people on the premises of Edenbrook who could invade his personal space without a modicum of manners.
“Can I help you?” He modulated his voice to ensure the tone was expressing two things: annoyance and irony in the otherwise polite question.
“I’m sorry.” From all the voices, this one he did not expect to hear now. A melodic tone was joined by a scuffle of retreating steps. “Do you want me to go?”
Ethan curled his lips in a tiny smile. They both knew she wasn’t apologetic and that he wanted anything but her to leave.
“No, it’s just that there are only two people in this hospital that wouldn’t bother knocking and I thought it was one of them paying me a visit.”
“Let me guess… Zaid and Baz?”
“No, but in terms of concept, you were actually close…just another type of evil ‘twins’."
“Oh, you mean his majesty King Bloom & his annoyance Dr Carrick?”
“Even as a joke, it sounds creepy and horrible.”
“Well, count me as a third now. Heads up though, I will only stop knocking after twilight.”
It was clear as crystal Ethan’s already specific sense of humor had less than ever space for amusement.
“I brought you this.” She put a brown paper bag on his desk, which immediately revealed the aroma of something delicious. “I figured you’re probably gonna stay here all night, so I thought I’ll pop over and check on you.”
He didn’t say anything, staring into the darkness. Not because he didn’t want to - he simply didn’t know what. This simple gesture was very touching and filled him with gratitude. But he was lacking the right words.
Then, for the first time since she’s interrupted his train of thought, he turned around to look at her. Tired and with puffy eyes, she’d still put everyone else to shame. Even on the worst of days, the light radiating from her turned heads and made the room brighter.
She extended a hand and when their fingers touched, he felt this weird, tingly feeling that has traveled from his palm, through his arm and neck, and then straight to his core.
Pressing him gently against the edge of the desk, she took his glasses off. Then loosened his tie and nonchalantly disheveled his hair. Ethan wouldn’t let anyone else in the world touch them, let alone put them in a state of such disarray.
With her, all the rules existed only to be broken.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on in this big brain of yours?”
“Smart move, Valentine. You’ve pacified me so that now I will have no choice but to tell you whatever you want to know.”
“You always have a choice, let’s just hope you’re gonna make the right one.”
Ethan nodded, no sound escaping his lips. She knew she’d have to take it upon herself to get any information out of her stubborn converser.
“So, how are you holding up? I want an honest answer."
“I’ve been better.”
“I thought so.”
“It’s just that… Tobias is driving me crazy. His presence really tests my patience… I don’t know if I would’ve stopped myself from punching him had it not been for you.”
“Why thank you, I didn’t know my therapeutic services were that good.”
“They are.” Ethan cleared his throat. “But it’s… not just that.”
Dead silence lingered between them and he knew he had no other choice but to continue.
“The only reason why I haven’t wiped this ridiculous smirk off his face yet is that whenever I look at him, I… I see you in that room with Travis. I’m trying to remind myself that, as much as I hate to admit it, he was crucial to finding the cure on such short notice.”
“Ethan…”
“I already told you” - he interrupted her as if not to stop the words from flowing, afraid they may be trapped forever otherwise - “that there was so much more at stake last time Tobias set foot in Edenbrook.”
She took a deep breath, her eyes going slightly wider.
“The truth is, for me… everything was at stake. I would’ve done anything he’d asked me to, I’d have forgiven him if it meant saving you.”
Elle turned still, all her body movements, her breathing and even her blinking ceased.
It was one of those moments that mean so much but leave you with so little to say.
Using the power of non-verbal communication and their deep affinity, she bestowed on him the most gentle, loving and grateful expression her face could muster after yet another exhausting shift.
Ethan extended his arm and before she realized it, her back was gently pressed to the older doctor’s chest. Having wrapped her slender frame with his broad shoulders, Elle inhaled his familiar aroma. He smelled of comfort and felt like a safe harbor. He nudged her hair with his nose and placed a featherlight kiss on the crook of her neck. She smelled of calmness and felt like coming back home from a long journey.
“So,” - he murmured directly into her ear - “whether you like it or not, I am using you to soften the blow every time I look at Tobias’ face.”
“I think I can live with that.”
“But I can’t guarantee it will always be enough, he is a cocky son of a bitch.”
“Let's make a deal then. I see how much it costs you and I’m not telling you to trust Leland or forgive Tobias, I still believe you should be cautious. Let’s just wait and see where this goes, I think we’ll know sooner rather than later. In the meantime, we should focus on what matters the most, our patients.”
“Where is the deal part?”
“If it turns out you were right, I will hold Tobias and you will punch him. Deal?”
“I believe it should be the other way round. Declan Nash’s face told me your right hook is exquisite, Rookie.”
They both laughed at the memory which seemed so distant now, almost as if it's happened in another lifetime.
But Ethan went quiet again and she felt his body tense up, his arms tightening gently around her. It wasn’t very obvious, but she knew. It still came as a shock how well she actually knew him.
“Ethan? What is it?”
“Nothing.”
“Ethan.”
“I’m sorry, I am not the most cheery companion today. You’re probably better off not spending too much time with me before you turn into a cynic.”
“Dr Ramsey, what a pathetic attempt of trying to get rid of me. You’ve never been the most cheerful type and I’ve survived your gloomy companionship, hell, I think it grew on me over time. So I should be ok today, too.”
It looked like silence was very much their third companion today.
“I’m thinking about Francis.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“I’m thinking about how hard it would be not to see. So many beautiful things, colors, all turning into nothingness.”
“I take it you mean the opera?”
“That too, but let’s just say I’ve learned to appreciate things that are right in front of my nose… literally and figuratively.”
The butterflies started somersaulting in her stomach.
“I didn’t want to add more to your plate at the time, but I’ve already felt this way… when we diagnosed Caroline and Leland.”
It was funny that, despite his obvious animosity towards Bloom, whenever his wife was in the picture, he spoke about both in an almost affectionate way. His doctor’s instincts were kicking in, because first and foremost he was a doctor who had his patients’ best interest at heart.
“The thought of not being able to touch you…it reminded me of touching you through the layer of hazmat suit. And now with everything Francis has been through, I just can’t be bothered to think about anything else but you. This is my true personal connection to this case.”
It was her turn to be speechless.
Ethan tightened his grip over her once again, this time protectively rather than out of stress. Slow hum started filling the air, the melody soon joined by lyrics, which he sang in fluent Italian; a private concert, performed for her and her only.
Tu pure, oh Principessa
Nella tua fredda stanza
Guardi le stelle
Che tremano d'amore
E di speranza**
She remembered their patient’s face, which seemed calmer once Ethan started singing the aria before the depths of illness contorted it with pain.
Francis' husband's words echoed throughout her head.
Even though the man holding her in his arms didn’t say it, there was no need.
She knew.
He will always be here.
And she will always be here, too.
-----
** Lyrics - aria "Nessun Dorma" (‘None shall sleep’) from the opera "Turandot".
Translation:
Even you, oh Princess,
In your cold room,
Watch the stars,
That tremble with love
And with hope.
Tag 🔖 list: @starrystarrytrouble @genevievemd @sophxwithers @maurine07 @lovingramsey @iemcpbchoices @oldminniemcg @schnitzelbutterfingers @archxxronrookie @jamespotterthefirst @the-pale-goddess @queencarb @fireycookie @qrkowna @coffeeheartaddict @utterlyinevitable @gryffindordaughterofathena @xxsugarplumfluffsxx @wingedhairstylemusicweasel @mrs-ramsey @tsrookie @fayeswiftie @mercury84choices @lisha1valecha @lucy-268 @stateofgracious @danijimenezv @alina-yol-ramsey
@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics
132 notes · View notes
loveislattes · 3 years ago
Text
Everything Comes at a Price (Demon!Dark/Fem!Reader) Chapter 1
Commission prompt: Reader is really depressed, and Dark decides to roughly Fuck the depression out of them
Important: Reader has female pronouns and is a vagina owner!
Warnings (For this chapter specifically): Talk of depression and stressful life, mentions of unnamed character death, mentions of beheading/dismembered head and some minor blood/gore (not too detailed), cursing, mentions of family in the hospital, demon!Dark (akin to jinn or genie), and pet names.
A/N: PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS! This first chapter is allllll story setting. Part two will have the good ol' rough and dominating Dark fucking.
As always, if you would like to support me, I have a Ko-Fi (here) for donations and I usually have a few slots open for commissions (unless life gets in the way)!
“Look, I think it’s just best if you take some time off.”
Though worded nicely, you instinctually felt the pang of panic and anger already bristling in your chest.
“Time off…” you murmur, eyes sliding down to your boss’s desk in thought, “As in, a week or two or…?”
You let the implication hang heavy in the air. There was a telling silence that followed your question. When you finally met his gaze again, your boss let out a hefty sigh. Before he even said anything, you knew what his answer was by the sympathy on his face alone.
“We won’t fight your unemployment for the first few months, which hopefully will be enough time for you to find another place of employment. I’m sorry, Miss Y/N, but between the company making cutbacks and your recent drop in productivity, I had to-”
“Don’t you dare,” you hissed sharply, interrupting him before he could finish the excuse.
Rage fueled your motions, forcing you to your feet while your eyes narrowed on the man you’d once thought a decent person.
“A drop in productivity?” you scoffed, “My apartment building was just destroyed in a freak fire two weeks ago that, of course, my insurance refused to cover. I’ve been bouncing place to place between motels and friend’s homes until I can afford another deposit on the measly pay you give us. My mother is in the hospital, in the ICU, after a freak hit and run. My car broke down yesterday and I walked thirty fucking minutes in the pouring rain today just to make sure you assholes weren’t a man down with all this work. And you knew all of this, but you still decided to fire me? I can’t- You know what, fuck you. Fuck you and fuck this place! I hope this whole company shuts down and you get to experience even a modicum of the instability I’ve had to!”
Before he could respond, you slammed the chair back into place against the desk and stormed from the room. You could feel the confused gazes from your coworkers as you marched to the door but didn’t dare spare them a glance. Most of them you considered to be your friends and you knew you’d have to explain everything later, but you couldn’t allow anything other than anger to inhabit your body at that moment. One bit of sadness and you would crumble. Rage would keep you safe until you made it to your temporary home for the night.
Little curses and fury-filled resentment spilled from your lips as you stepped out into the dreary public. Of course, it was still raining. You hadn’t even dried off from your trek to work and now you were thrown right back out into the storm. A timely crack of lightning rumbled across the sky as you shot one last middle finger back at the door.
“I can’t believe this shit,” you grumbled.
Pulling your raincoat up over your head, you kept your gaze down and began your journey back to the hotel. The one upside to all the rain was that the sidewalks were nearly barren. Cars sped by on the busy roads but you were alone on foot. In fact, you didn’t see a single soul until you were on the block housing your hotel, and somehow that lonely occupant still managed to slam into you.
“Excuse you,” you muttered.
“So sorry, please excuse me.”
The person’s voice sent shivers down your spine and every last hair stood up on your arms. Reflexively you pulled back as a hand touched your side, ready to give them a mouthful, but they were moving on by the time you could gather your wits about you. All you caught was a tall form in a black business suit striding off in the opposite direction.
With an irked tsk and a mutter of “Fucking asshole”, you rushed into the lobby, stomping the rain from your shoes along the rubber mat. Sure you were pissed off but you still had the human decency not to create more work for others.
You managed a little nod to the desk clerk on your way by to the elevator. As you watched the numbers climb slowly down, you mentally questioned the fates if the world was against you. The elevator stopped on literally every- single- floor; All 25. Trying to maintain your composure, you leaned up against the wall and let your eyes flutter closed, slowly breathing in and out rhythmically. Just a little longer and you’d be in the safety of solitude. You could let it all out.
The ding of the lift doors opening pulled you out of your little meditative session and you immediately let out a grateful sigh of appreciation upon realizing it was empty. Being stuck in a small metal box with others for an undetermined amount of time made your skin crawl, much less when you were already on the edge of snapping. You mashed the close button repeatedly until the metal doors finally sealed shut and the elevator began to move. The rest of the journey was a blur until you stopped at your room door and fished your card out of your pocket, coming out with not only the plastic key but a large silver coin.
“The fuck?” you muttered.
As the door buzzed open, you flipped the coin over in your fingers, trying to think back on when you had gotten it. You were pretty sure you’d never seen anything like it before; completely void of any details on one side but the other filled with finely engraved words.
The loud startling thump of your keys as you threw them on the nightstand wasn’t even enough to draw your concentration away from the interesting little trinket. It took a few minutes and some good lighting but you eventually figured out what was written; the discovery only confusing you further.
“Clutch this coin to thee whilst ye make a plea
In return ye shall become my endless devotee”
“Yeah… that’s not creepy at all,” you sighed.
Tossing the coin on the nightstand next to your keys, you sloughed off your wet clothes and tossed them in the small hamper next to your duffle bag. After this horrid morning, you needed a long hot shower before you pondered on any strange coins or the mental shithole that had become your life.
You weren’t sure exactly how long you spent under the burning water but, by the time you exited, you were both hungry and in dire need of some caffeine.
“Or a nap. A nap could be heavenly,” you murmured to yourself.
Towel around your head, you dropped into the bed naked and took a moment to revel in the sheets against your freshly lotioned skin. There was hardly a better feeling. Thank god you had the good sense to buy some of your own sheets rather than rely on whatever the hotels had to offer. It made your day the tiniest bit better.
As you leaned back against the headboard, you snagged up the coin once more. The metal was cool against your warm fingers as you flipped it around and around. Did you dare give it a try? What was the worst outcome: You felt silly for believing a random coin and no one would ever know? Although, what if it was legit...?
Now that thought made you feel silly. A little chuckle passed your lips before you clasped the coin between your hands and brought it to your chest, closing your eyes as if about to pray.
“Alright, I don’t know how this works so I’m just gonna state my wishes out loud. I hope that works for, well, whoever you are. First off, I want that backstabbing business ruined. They fucked me over after I bent over backward for them, now they deserve to feel the same. Please. Second, I don’t know how you could do it, but I’d really like my insurance company to finally approve my apartment claim so I can find another place soon. Third-”
You trailed off as emotions immediately welled up behind your eyelids, the burning already tingling in the back of your throat from holding them in.
“My third and most important wish, please, if nothing else, find the one that put my mom in the ICU and make them pay. Those idiots down at the police department couldn’t find them, or so they say anyway, so just… give them what they deserve, please.”
With a stifled sniffle, you wiped away the few tears that had escaped and fell back against the headboard, eyes staring unseeing at the ceiling as you let the pain wash over you; Rage, dread, hope, apathy, desperation. Eventually, the unending barrage became too much to deal with. This wasn't a new thing in your life, but it had certainly culminated into something worse with everything going on in your life; clinical depression exacerbated by a series of unfortunate events.
With no other plans for the day and the weight of your heart heavy in your chest, you chose to simply roll over and bury yourself, and your troubles, in the fluffy comforter. You’d feel better after a nap. You were almost certain of it.
Even as you drifted off into sleep, the tears didn’t cease.
When you first woke, you weren’t sure what had roused you but you knew it wasn’t good; All you could feel was bone-trembling terror. You couldn’t move, couldn’t speak, felt frozen in place with only the ability to stare at the now dimly lit wall; watching the shafts of setting sunlight ever so slowly creep down by the minute.
“Come now, darling,” a low voice crooned in the void behind you, “I know you’re awake.”
Like a rubber band snapping, the grip on your body suddenly released and you shot up in bed, immediately turning around to find out who had spoken. You weren’t sure what you expected but it certainly wasn’t the devilishly handsome man that was seated next to the window. The sunlight pouring down on him made it very obvious that his skin was lacking any range of melanin, rather being pallor shades of whites, blacks, and greys, but that didn't detract from his appearance at all. In fact, he looked like something out of a Gothic romance novel or a Tim Burton movie. Once the enchantment of seeing him began to wear off, you finally noticed what sat on the table next to him.
A human head.
“Holy fuck!”
A hellish screech escaped your lips as you hastily scrambled backward, trying to get as far away from him as quickly as possible, only to go careening off the edge of the mattress. The pain of impact on the floor couldn’t even deter you. As your back hit the wall, you kept your eyes pinned on the intruder, watching for any sign that he was going to follow you or attack.
“While I’m certainly not minding the show, don’t you think you’re rather underdressed for this occasion?” he spoke suddenly.
It took a few moments for his words to sink in but the moment they did, you launched yourself back at the bed with a hushed curse and promptly pulled the sheets up around your naked body.
“Who are you? How did you get in here? I-Is- Is that real?”
Long clawed fingers made their way into the matted, bloody mess of hair and pulled the body part free from the table with a sickening pop.
“It is undoubtedly real, but I figured you’d believe me much quicker if I had a visual aide to my claims,” he replied, dropping the offending thing before tossing you a sharp, seductive, smile, “The name is Dark. I’m a demon and the owner of the coin you wished upon.”
Your tongue felt too heavy to move while you watched in horror as he licked the blood from his fingers like a cat bathing itself.
“I- I don’t-”
“You don’t understand,” he supplied helpfully.
As he rose from his seat, you stared at him owlishly, unable to take your eyes off his graceful form as he nearly glided across the floor to stand in front of you.
“That coin,” he hummed, pointing at the metal disc in question, “It belongs to me. When someone makes a wish while holding it, I’m able to hear them. In your case, I heard all three.”
Trepidation tickled the nape of your neck when your eyes slowly rolled over to the head once more. It was as if you couldn’t breathe. Sick crawled up your throat and it took every ounce of your strength to keep from vomiting at the man’s feet. You don’t know how long you sat there, struggling to breathe and ease the nausea but, when it finally went away, rage took over.
“I didn’t want you to actually KILL them!” you shouted.
The demon casually arched a brow in your direction before saying, “You specifically wished for the one involved in your mother’s accident to get what they deserved.”
“Yeah! Like prison! Not death!”
A soul-trembling crack resounded through the small hotel room as he slowly craned his neck side to side, ethereal pulses of red and blue emanating from his being. Some of the previous ire slipped from your hold when he moved even closer, step by step until his knees were touching yours.
“I will never understand you humans and your sense of righteousness. Would it ease your mind to know this wasn’t the first time they had committed such heinous crimes?” he asked.
“W-What?” you questioned softly.
“I will not delve into details but rest assured that your embarrassing sense of compassion was lost on them; they were vermin,” he explained, “Now, that makes three wishes fulfilled. You have two remaining.”
You thought back on exactly what wishes you had made and were immediately overcome with dismay.
“Wait, what did you do?!” you demanded, jumping to your feet and glaring up at him, “You didn’t kill anyone else, did you?!”
A twinge of disdain passed through his features. His hand landed heavily on your shoulder and you were shoved back down onto the bed with a 'tsk' of disapproval, as if scolding a misbehaving child.
“Fortunately for you, no. Your previous place of employment has simply been condemned for multiple code violations that have mysteriously come to light during a surprise investigation, and your insurance company has been informed that they’re facing a lawsuit if they don’t reevaluate your claim with a more positive outlook.”
Relief flushed through your veins and you thanked him meekly. You wouldn’t have been able to live your life knowing you had caused the deaths of so many people, let alone friends.
“So, what now?” you asked.
“You have two more wishes before your soul belongs to me.”
He said it with such finality and ease that you almost didn’t react at first. Once his words settled in though, oh, panic quickly followed.
Gaping up at him in wide-eyed disbelief, you tried to stammer out some rebuttal or plea, but nothing would come out. Panic soon gave way to defeat as you realized there was no obvious way to get out of this ordeal. It had been clear as day on the coin.
Thinking on the offending piece of metal, you looked over and snagged it up, reading the inscription once more.
“Clutch this coin to thee whilst ye make a plea
In return ye shall become my endless devotee”
“So that’s what this meant,” you sighed quietly, before gazing at him once more, “And there’s no way to bargain out of this?”
He looked mildly pleased by your inquiry, letting out a little hum before falling back into an ornate chair that definitely hadn’t been there a few seconds ago.
“And what would you bargain?” he purred, “What could a simple little human such as yourself have to give to me, other than your soul of course.”
You cursed his infallible logic and stayed quiet as you tried to think over your options. Truly, you had nothing else to give him; no money nor gifts. Your soul was the only valuable thing you owned, and there was no undoing what had been done. A person had died because of your wish.
With a heavy sigh, you sat up to your full height and prepared yourself mentally.
“Is there a time limit? Do I have to make my wishes today or can I think about them?” you asked.
“You’re free to use them when and wherever you wish. However, do not think this a loophole. Choosing to postpone your wishes until death does not release you from this contract. Your soul will still belong to me when you die.”
Well fuck. There went that option. If you were doomed no matter what, you might as well make use of the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity... right?
“I’m going to need time,” you whispered.
“Fair enough,” he replied, finally taking a step back, “You have my calling card. You can call for me if you have any questions, otherwise, you know what to do.”
He strolled back to the window and snagged the dismembered head, flashing you a wide smirk that framed his fangs perfectly.
“I’ll just be taking this with me. Hope to hear from you soon, darling.”
28 notes · View notes
mi6-cafe · 4 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media
THE DRABBLES ARE IN! COME READ THEM AND VOTE!
GUYS, WE HAVE 15 AWESOME DRABBLES FOR YOU!
Our writers did an excellent job. All of them wrote 100-word drabbles  based on this picture:
Tumblr media
READ THEM ALL BELOW THE LINE AND WHEN YOU’VE PICKED YOUR TOP THREE FAVOURITES COME >>VOTE HERE<<
But how do?
anyone can vote (read the fics, pick your top 3 favourites and put that in the google form)
yes, even the writers can vote (they should, however, vote for someone other than themselves)
please, while you vote: also give anonymous feedback to the drabbles. we will send this to the writers after voting ends
why you should give feedback to the writers: we and they will love you forever but it won’t be creepy because you’ll be anonymous
READ&VOTE UNTIL SUNDAY 11.59PM Eastern, 4:59AM UTC!
Now, here are the drabbles!
#1
Title: Arson Author: artsytarts / Misha Warnings: None
Summary: If there is one talent James Bond has, it’s to give his Quartermaster a headache.
“Can I ask you a question, 007?”
“Not like you’d respect my wishes if I said no, Q. Go ahead.”
“Why is it that you always, without fail, find some way to cause an explosion? I’m starting to believe you have an arsonist streak.”
“I don’t do it on purpose, it just… happens.”
“You do know that you’re supposed to keep things quiet, right? ‘Secret’. It’s in the job description.”
“Not my fault their base lay beneath a firework factory.”
“Wouldn’t have been a problem if you didn’t blow it up!”
“Debatable.”
“I’m sure you mean ‘yes, Q’.”
“Yes, Q.”
#2
Title: Occupational Hazards Author: storm-of-sharp-things Warnings: none Summary: Q would willingly pay extra for the option to have a boring vacation…
Q sat back against James in the little rowboat and stared across the lake as bright jets of sparks shot up from the island. The fiery glow amid the trees was beautiful in the reflection of the dark water. James settled the blanket more comfortably around them, keeping the chill off their bare skin.
“I liked that cabin,” Q finally said.
James sighed. “What’s the probability that our rental cabin would be a hidden entrance to a secret arsenal of explosives?”
With a splash, Alec finally surfaced next to the boat, grinning wickedly.
Q scowled. “One hundred percent, I’d say.”
#3
Title: Postcard Author: sunaddicted Warnings: none Summary: Bond stops in the middle of a mission for a view Q shouldn’t absolutely miss.
“Bond, stop dallying”
“Look, Q”
He sighed, squinting at the screen broadcasting the grainy images coming from the small camera that he had managed to disguise as a lapel pin “What exactly am I looking at?”
“Wait for it”
“Bond, need I to remind you that you’re on- Oh”
“Beautiful, isn’t it?”
Q was enraptured in the blue fire shooting up towards the dark of night: he couldn’t remember the last time he had looked up at the sky, eyes full of awe “Yes, it really is” he admitted “Thank you, James. Move along now: your contact is waiting”
“Yessir”
#4
Title:Flare Author: Hexiva Warnings: Angst Summary: Alec and James on a stakeout. One moment of hope.
What James remembers from that night in Canada is the fireworks. Fireworks reflecting off the lake as he sat in the dark waiting for morning when their target would walk by. Fireworks reflecting in Alec’s eyes, a manic gleam as he leaned in to adjust Bond’s hand on his rifle. And in the darkness between displays, they looked at each other, the instruments of their bloody work forgotten.
Years later, after everything, after the betrayal, James doesn’t remember who reached out first. All he remembers is the sound of fireworks as they kissed, clinging to each other in the darkness.
#5
Title: Rest & Relaxation Author: SouffleGirl91 Warnings: None Summary: James and Q kiss goodbye to yet another security deposit.
“This was fun. We should do it more often.”
James watched an explosion illuminate the sky, showering white sparks on the carnage below.
“Did you hit your head?”
“What?” Q frowned. “No! Why?”
“You want to do this-” James gestured at the flames, “more often?”
Another loud crack, and the cabin roof collapsed, sending up a plume of smoke.
“Well, maybe not the part where your ex-boyfriend tries to burn us to death in our sleep…”
“So just the murder, then?”
“Pillock.”
James laughed. “If this is what holidays with you are like, I’d love to do it more often.”
#6
Title: Efficiency Author: Anyawen Warnings: None Summary: Bond appreciates competence, whatever it wears.
James ignores the cold of the Canadian spring night, attention focused on the far side of the lake.
“I can get closer,” he offers quietly over comms.
“Stay where you are, Bond. I’ve got this,” Q answers.
Q’s frenzied typing stills, and James hears satisfaction in the silence a moment before an explosion rocks the lodge. He watches, bemused, as stray fireworks streak into the sky.
“The security on their firework storage facility needs work,” Q remarks dryly before utterly failing to stifle a yawn.
Another firework explodes, illuminating James’ fond smile.
“Not bad for a man in his pyjamas.”
#7
Title: Isle of Bond Author: Warnings: none Summary: No man is an island.
They say, “no man is an island,” and they’re right.
Bond would disagree; would claim the title for himself.
He would say that he is a man for himself, as he trusts his life in the hands of friends. He would build a fortress of solitude, only to fly from it in a blaze of glory. He would fence his heart with spikes, spark, smirks, and sex. Until someone is unafraid to get stung.
Bond would lay life, death, heart, and gun at the feet of true love.
“They say, no man is an island, and they’re right,” Bond says.
#8
Title: forget the past Author: scarytheory Warnings: none Summary: In the woods, in the middle of the night, two friends are trying to make peace with everything.
“This is ridiculous,” says Q, looking at Moneypenny. “It’s not New Year’s. Also, do you know how harmful it is to animals?”
She gives him the side-eye: “Your complaining already scared everything within ten miles of here. And it’s symbolic, actually. Because he’s not coming back, not to me, not to you. We need to start over, with a bang. Help me set this off.”
With a sigh, he does.
And here they are, watching fireworks in the middle of March, both feeling lost.
But as she slips her hand in his, he thinks that maybe they will be alright.
#9
Title: Inferno Author: oldestcharm Warnings: fire Summary: Q appreciates the scenery. Bond isn’t pleased.
Q’s eyes are glued to the live feed from the helicopter. “This is very scenic,” he comments. Bond huffs. “Are you talking about the forest fire, the flare guns, or the volcano that’s about to burst now that I obliterated this guy’s lair?” Q hums, considering. “All of the above.” “I’m pleased to know you care so much for my safety.” “You’re just fine, 007,” Q assures him. “I’m standing in the middle of burning debris,” Bond points out. “There is a lake right beside you. Grab a bucket.” “You didn’t equip me with a bucket.” “Maybe next time then.”
#10
Title: Birthday Celebration Author: Nana-41175 Warnings: n/a Summary: Q is gifted with spectacular fireworks for his birthday by Bond
Q was sure he would dislike camping. He did not feel kindly toward the idea of a million insects descending upon him while they roughed it out in the woods. Plus, no internet. Hideous.
But he liked fireworks at dusk, especially when viewed over water. He was touched that Bond wanted him to see this: the lake, the dark circle of trees surrounding the warm, cheery glow of a campfire, the slender strands of bright light as they shot up toward the night sky.
Most of all he adored being in Bond’s arms as his boyfriend whispered, “Happy birthday, darling.”
#11
Title: In the End Author: Venstar Warnings: none Summary: One last goodbye.
Bond stared as the island of Mr. White burned away in a final fiery glow. So many things had been set in place there. Thoughts of Vesper slid through his mind, like a dark oil slick on water. Never to truly be erased. He felt something slide into his hand. A weapon. Something strong and flexible. He squeezed and felt bones move. Q. Something else that had been set in place. A gift, from one madman to another. Silva’s little cogwheel in the bigger scheme of things had inadvertently delivered Q to MI6…and James. He kissed those fingers. His weapon.
#12
Title: Miscalculation Author: Merc/moon_of_mercury Warnings: none Summary: Bond makes a strategic mistake. Q improvises to save the day.
“Gorgeous, aren’t they?”
“No, not really. They’re an unnecessary waste of money, spread heavy metals and other contaminants in the environment, cause noise pollution, not to mention the stress to animals and people who don’t like them–”
“Alright! Fine. I should have asked you first.”
“Or used your head for once. I told you; the cats and I are a package deal. If you plan for me you plan for them. I’m not having fun when my darlings are terrified.”
Before the mood sours, Q pulls James into a kiss.
“But we can always stay in. I’ll show you fireworks.”
#13
Title: How Does He Do That? Author: IrishWitch58 Warnings: Things blowing up, Canon typical violence, 006 and explody stuff Summary: Bond and Q watching the end of a 006 mission
Bond watched intently as Q focused on the terse commentary from the extraction team. Trust 006 to find one of the few primary forests left in Europe to play hide and seek with terrorists. Injured, bleeding but in possession of valued intel he’d been sent after, Trevelyan was being sought by both sides. One of the drone cameras blazed with light, flaring streamers rising from a central explosion. Q blinked, eyes watering before the screen dimmed.
“How does he do that every bloody time? I never issued him any explosives.”
Bond just shrugged, grinning. “When has that ever stopped Alec?”
#14
Title: Beacon Author: solarmorrigan Warnings: None Summary: Q is very good at reading even the smallest signs.
“Come on,” Q murmured.
Images flashed by on his screens: satellite feeds, CCTV stills, personal security system hacks, social media posts – anything he could think of. Windows overlapped, flashed, jockeyed for space and called for attention as new information poured in. Then, at last, a filter-covered photograph from one website or another, a tiny island lit up by a few explosive columns of light, drew Q’s notice.
Unexpected fireworks off the coast, the caption read.
Q checked the location. He checked the time. He smiled.
“There you are,” he sighed, and began the work of piecing together Bond’s trail.
#15
Title: We Don’t Need Fireworks Author: MrKsan / starrboned Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence Summary: Bond makes things explode. Q watches from afar.
The skies were ablaze with stardust and fire. It could’ve been beautiful, Q thought, had it not been his job to clean up the mess after.
Damn Bond and his dramatics.
Footsteps approached from behind, and Q couldn’t help but smile as an arm looped around his waist.
“007,” Gareth sighed. Q snorted, leaning into the warmth. Something exploded in the distance.
“Wish you could join him?” Gareth asked. “Share the action?”
Q turned his head, watching the fireworks reflect in his eyes.
“I got all the fire I need right here,” Q smiled, and leaned in for a kiss.
Go vote!
73 notes · View notes
barbasbodaciousbeard · 4 years ago
Text
The One with the Engagement Picture
Tumblr media
Ayy, using this to try new ones. Another for @thatesqcrush​’s FRIENDS challenge.
Peter Stone hadn’t always been as much of a partier as he’d become, and he would certainly reject the term womanizer. Anyone he dated or slept with knew that he just wasn’t ready to settle down anymore. Maybe it was because he’d tried to do that once and ruined it. When he tore his ulnar collateral ligament, he’d accepted he wouldn’t be pitching anymore, and slowly an ocean seemed to settle between himself and his teammates. He was bitter, and they were busy. As the partying stopped for him to heal and return to school, there was one woman he found himself content to spend nights with on the couch with. It was the first time since he’d been an adult that Peter was in a serious, monogamous relationship, and he thought it suited him.
Dahlia had moved to Chicago for graduate school, and she was thoroughly unimpressed with his baseball background. Did she think it was cool? Sure. Was she understanding they’d be going to games? Yes. But, he had to teach her how the game worked and let her know which of his friends even played when she met them. She was more interested in dragging him antique shopping or to old bookshops where he’d have to keep her from falling off of a ladder. While she learned his world, Peter got far more comfortable than he ever expected to with pin curls, vintage compacts, and inspecting dresses for sweat stains or cigarette burns. It made her happy to invest time in it, so if she’d wear his old jersey tucked into her high waisted jeans and go to a game with him, he’d take pictures of his pin up at the rockabilly festival they drove out to.
When he proposed, he was nauseatingly proud to find a mid century ring at the vintage jewelry store she loved. The owner knew him from each time he had followed her through, shopping bags in hand as she purused. That meant he had help from a woman who knew Dahlia’s ring size and which cut she’d like the most; he picked correctly anyway, she’d said. He’d been careful to plan an outing to the park, packing a picnic and red and white checked blanket. He had a friend hiding to capture pictures, and it felt like the timing was perfect. Soon enough, he had a picture of her, hand over her mouth as he asked her to marry him sitting on his desk at home, and one with her showing off the ring as she pressed a kiss to his cheek, his arms slung around her waist, sitting on his office desk.
Things were easier then, when he was working and she was in school. Their schedules still aligned, so they could see each other in the evenings.  Then, she finished her MFA and taught night classes in order to make ends meet while she worked on her next novel. They’d met not long before the first was published, and he’d read a preview copy the first weekend he knew her and dug up poetry she’d published in volumes stored at the university. His brain didn’t work like that and he liked that about her. He was more about practicality and comfort. She was creative and artistic, comfort be damned.
The change in schedules made things hard. Peter wasn’t good when things got hard. The transition to not seeing each other much during the week, even though they lived together, quickly coupled with wedding planning stress to create arguments they hadn’t had before. Instead of quiet togetherness, they’d bicker. He got home late, so they didn’t see each other before she left to teach. She had to pick something up after work, so he was asleep when she got home. Dahlia wanted to plan the wedding, and Peter was getting nervous because he hadn’t watched many marriages stay happy. He pushed off decisions, avoided picking a venue. After a while, she got an offer to teach creative writing in New York. 
“I could have normal hours, Peter. We could see each other. You know you’d get a job in New York.”
“I’m not going back there, Dahl.”
“It’s a big city. You wouldn’t even have to see him. We wouldn’t even have to tell Ben, would we?”
“No.”
“So we just keep not planning a wedding and not seeing each other? Do you even want to marry me?”
“You know I do.”
“No I don’t!” 
“Then maybe you should take the fucking job without me.”
The minute he said it, he regretted it. The way Dahlia’s face fell and tears came made him feel stupid. She’d spent her weekends helping him with physical therapy. She’d taken the shitty adjuncting job to stay in Chicago until he was a little more established. She was patient about maneuvering the strained dynamic between Ben and Peter Stone. Hell, she wasn’t even asking him to go back to New York forever. It was a year and then the university would evaluate if they’d offer her a permanent position. They could be back in Chicago after a year. And now she was crying. He hadn’t made her do that before, not because she was sad.
“Fine,” she managed, jaw shifting as she tried to get the tears to stop. “I’ll go then. I can’t keep doing this. You won’t plan the wedding. We fight all the time. And now you want me to go? Here’s your fucking ring.”
If Peter had been used to having a girlfriend or wanting her to stay, Peter might have developed the skills required to do more than stare as Dahlia shoved her clothes into a suitcase and clutch the ring in his outstretched hand. He might have thought to fly to the city when he realized she’d actually gone ahead and moved and show up at her apartment unemployed and ready to go to the courthouse to prove he needed her there. 
Instead, he steeled his jaw over the next few weeks. His arm had healed the first year of law school, so he simply returned to his circle of friends that went out and dated whoever and covered for each other. He always ignored the ones in a vintage dress or with dark curled hair. Those were the ones who could hurt him. Who let him pretend afterwards that it was Dahlia beside him, and they were married and happy. 
When he moved out the apartment they’d shared-it was too much there now- he picked a painfully modern place and filled it with sleek modern furniture, The antiques she hadn’t taken were sold, and he finally felt that maybe he’d scrubbed his life of Dahlia, save the engagement pictures he kept in the top drawer of his desk. She had probably responded to the break up like an actual adult and moved on. Had a husband and career. Maybe even a baby. He hated the thought, so when he thought it, he’d pour another drink. And it was fine, because he’d just distanced himself from everything that could make him think of her. And that was fine, really it was. Peter had been a playboy before. He was a partier. He was an ex-baseball player. And he was fine.
Then his father died. 
Peter felt the solitude then. There hadn’t been anything new and hard to process since Dahlia left. He wandered New York and wondered if she was still there somewhere or if she’d gotten another teaching job somewhere. When McCoy convinced him to take the ADA position after Baba’s trial, he couldn’t say no, and one of the engagement photos found a new home in the top drawer of his new desk. SVU was harder, and it found its way out more. He’d hold it in his free hand, sipping a drink as he tried to channel the advice she’d have given him. 
“Ben liked her,” Jack said softly one day. “He had a copy of that picture until the engagement ended.”
“I was an idiot.”
“Aren’t we all at some point? Learn from it.”
Peter left it out after that. It faced him from the corner, and he remembered feeling grounded. That was what he really missed. Dahlia had given him a place to land. His dad had always felt unstable, and he wasn’t close with his mom. He wasn’t even always at home, staying with his aunt periodically.  And then he’d made a happy stable home with Dahlia and ruined it. 
When Pamela died, he stopped partying for fun and started using it to numb himself, but one night, he met a woman with dark brown pin curls and fair skin. She’d left when Dahlia’s name fell from his lips. That’s when he knew he had to reach out. He had to know if there was a family or a set of kids or a job in another city. He needed closure.
“Hello?” She sounded confused when she answered, and he suddenly remembered it was nearly midnight. He also remembered she never checked caller ID. Oh God, or she’d deleted his number.
“Dahlia?” Papers stopped shuffling and he could hear her sharp intake of breath. He could almost picture her, perched in an armchair, probably a yellow velvet one, with wide eyes and hair pinned up for the night and tied in a silk scarf as she graded or proofed her own manuscript. Maybe it was a friend’s manuscript.
Oh God, what if it was a husband’s manuscript. Another writer. She’d like that.
The cool metal of the picture he kept at home was pressed into the skin of his palm before he whispered, “Dahl, it’s Peter.”
“I know,” she said softly. “You don’t sound okay.”
“I’m not.”
“What happened?”
“Pamela.”
“What happened to Pamela? I can be on a plane to Chicago if you need someone. Or if you need help in the city, I can arrange things. Check on her.”
“How do you know I don’t have someone?” 
“Would you be calling if you did?”
“I’m in New York. Where did you end up?”
“They offered me a permanent position. How long have you been in the city?” He could tell she was trying to mask hurt that he hadn’t called before now. But what was he supposed to say? Dad’s dead so I live here now.
“Since January. Dad died. I prosecuted an ADA. Then I took his job.”
“Ben’s gone?”
“So is Pam.”
“Pam’s gone?” He let out a shaky breath, chest tight. “Send me your address.”
“You don’t have to--”
“Address or I start calling your baseball buddies.”
“I’ll text it.”
“I’m not hanging up until I’m there.”
“Is it creepy I keep the engagement photo on my desk?”
“We’re not touching that right now Peter. You’re drunk and not okay.”
She was true to her word, not hanging up the phone until she arrived at his apartment. When he opened the door, he saw her just as he’d imagined her. Her hair was pinned in the silk scarf and a silk robe was tied over her pajamas. She had thrown it on over the same babydoll top and short sets she’d always been hunting down patterns for so she could make them herself and she’d slid on flats. 
The sight of her made him feel tethered again, though he had had enough more to drink between the initial call and her arrival that he had gone from tipsy to unsteady. He went to hug her, and Dahlia carefully kicked the door close, locked it, and maneuvered him to his big leather couch that she looked terribly out of place on. 
“Let it out, Peter,” she whispered, and he buried his face into the crook of her neck like she might float away or vanish. The cry wasn’t like anything he’d let her see before. He’d been careful and controlled anytime something hurt, glossing over details that could make it worse to give her a pig picture. But now, he cried like he was alone, heaving sobs with snot and tears and drool as he clutched her. 
She settled into the couch enough he was basically curled in her lap. That’s how he woke the next morning too, curled against her torso with his head on her shoulder. She’d fallen asleep with her cheek pressed against the top of his head, and he was both embarrassed and relieved she was still there. Carefully he untangled himself from her, wanting to clean up before he had to face her. Face the fact it was his own fault he’d had to deal with it all alone.  
He came out to find her having obviously used the guest bathroom to rinse her face, though she was clad in his boxers and henley now. She was too averse to pants for his sweats. And like the angel she was, Dahlia was cooking. He was, however, mortified to see what she was holding as whatever she’d put in the oven cooked was the engagement photo he’d been clinging to when he called. But he could also see she seemed to be looking at it fondly. 
“Your interior design is terrible,” she teased gently, setting the frame aside. “I left you so much of the good stuff.”
“I couldn’t bring it from Chicago.”
“Peter, you forget I brought it from Chicago.”
“When I looked at furniture we found together, it made me miss you, so I got rid of it.”
“I kept mine because it made me remember you.”
“I’m the one that was an absolute moron.”
“It was easier then, huh?” she said softly, picking the picture up again. Their smiles were wider. There were fewer lines on their faces. Ben and Pam were in New York alive, and Dahlia and Peter had forever in front of them. Peter didn’t need to talk to her about something he didn’t want to remember.
“Yeah,” he whispered, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry I let you go.”
“I’m sorry I let you. I shouldn’t have left the first time we fought. I knew how you were.”
“You were right to. I went for what I knew would hurt.”
“We can address all of that later. For right now, do you want to start talking or eat and then talk?”
“It’s my fault Pam’s dead.”
“You need to elaborate on that one, Peter. Because I’m sure there is more happening than you’re saying.”
“I didn’t drop a case. A victim tortured her attacker. We didn’t know for sure at first. A cartel was involved and they threatened to hurt Pam if I didn’t drop the case. We had guards, but they massacred Pam’s facility and took her. Diaz killed her in the gunfire. Dahl, she recognized me. She called for me, and he killed her. It’s been months, and I just, I feel so lost.”
“Peter,” she whispered, pulling him close. 
He stiffened at first. He’d expected disgust, not sympathy. This was his fault. That’s what he’d been telling himself for weeks, distracting himself with booze and bars and women like he had done when he wanted to pretend his family was fine, that Pam wasn’t sick, that he was close with his dad. This time though, the hurt was bigger.  
He was crying into her shoulder again, and he suddenly wished he’d been smart enough to call the minute he’d arrived. That she’d been there at dad’s funeral and for the trial of Rafael Barba. Maybe then he wouldn’t have even taken the job. He’d have recognized something bad was brewing. Instead he’d gotten his sister killed and was clinging to Dahlia in the early morning light of his kitchen. 
“It happened in May.”
“Why didn’t you call sooner?”
“I didn’t mean to call now.”
“How have you been coping?” He was quiet, shifting awkwardly. “Baseball methods?”
“Yeah.” He was ashamed to tell her, and she squeezed him gently. 
“I went with baseball methods after we split. You’re a single man. I don’t like the thought and it’s not healthy, but it’s better than other things you could’ve done.” They didn’t speak much as they ate. Neither one knew what to say to the other any more, but she didn’t want to leave him alone and he shouldn’t be left alone. When he did speak again, his voice was gentler than it had been in a while.
“Can we go antiquing?” 
“You want to go?”
“I want to carry your bags and think about sweat stains.”
“How does that help you?”
“Is it manipulative if I say that’s the last time I was really happy? Because if you say no I won’t be mad. It’s just true.”
“It could be. But I believe you. I think it’s the last time I was really happy too.”
“Really?” 
“Depends? Did I pretend to understand baseball between our last antiquing trip and moving?”
“No. You moved in the off season.”
“Then really. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve been fine. I love work. I love writing. I love the city. But I like everything more with you. Even if you’re a jock.”
“I thought I was happy before you. But I wasn’t.”
“You have to take me home first so I can get ready.”
“Deal.” And that’s what found him in her living room while she got dressed. He wasn’t stupid; Dahlia was the same as she’d always been, so he was waiting patiently as she brushed out her set curls and did her make up. She came back out in a pretty shirtdress, one he felt sure he’d found for her a long time ago, and keds, and Peter knew he’d do anything to get this back. The feeling of groundedness, that maybe they could be a team again, awe she was even agreeing to comfort him on any level. 
She led him through new vintage shops now. They were in a whole new state after all. He decided that maybe baseball methods didn’t work, and he talked to Dahlia. This time he really talked though. He’d brushed over stories about his father and Pam. He didn’t like the bad ones or the feelings they could bring up. Besides, Ben Stone was a saint, didn’t you know? Peter hadn’t ever been talk about his father, so he kept that habit up with Dahlia the first time. He also told her the truth. He’d panicked over marrying her because she was his first real girlfriend and the prospect of settling down and having her grow to hate him like his mother had his father scared him. That one was a revelation to her. 
He’d basically moved in with her a month after their outing to go antiquing. She preferred their old furniture and her vintage collection. Besides, Peter, I have a built in vanity here! The engagement photo in the park was replaced on his desk a year later. It showed them now in a different park in a different city with different lives to the ones so long ago. They also had different methods of communication, meaning they’d weathered fights as they adjusted to things again. The same ring was on display, however, and the same smile was plastered on Peter’s face as Dahlia pressed a kiss to his cheek.
60 notes · View notes
albino-whumpee · 4 years ago
Text
On those quiet moments
As part of the editing, I decided to put 3 chapters into this one, collecting Sann´s experience at Zarai´s and how his relationship with Albus gets more intimate. Hope you enjoy it! (the first one requested by @liliability the second is inspired by this post by @whump-galaxy and the third one was requested by anon)
Taglist:  @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @giggly-evil-puppy @cowboysrappin @haro-whumps @burtlederp @neuro-whump @comfortforthepain @whumps-the-word @whole-and-apart-and-between @broken-horn @ashintheairlikesnow @rosesareviolentlyread@starnight-whump @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @as-a-matter-of-whump  @whumpasaurus101 @grizzlie70 @twistedcaretaker
Ok, god, this has been so so long in my drafts I´m so sorry.
I wanted to make something cute for this, I really tried, but Sann is opening up to me with a lot of dark stuff, so I will kind of share some of it? Hope you like it~
CW// Dehumanization, pet whump, creepy whumper, trauma recovery, collars, mental games, past noncon and dubcon touching, conditioning muzzles, conditioning, emotional whump, slight spice, mentioned past torture, scars, identity issues and trauma survivor navigating consent and relationships. Ask to tag! 
“Sann” the boy whispered to himself inside the crate he had arrived to the Glass mansion “Sann. My name´s Sann” he said to himself over and over as he tried to keep his mind away from the cold, from the pain of the bruises and beatings and the smell of other people. “Sann…”
His name was the first thing his Master gave him. Then the collar around his neck. A soft black leather band with golden buckles.
It meant Sann was his, and he had the right to do whatever he wanted to him.
Sann had expected to have his name called sweetly, gently pulled to his chest and be rewarded for his services. But his wishes were nobody´s concerns. Neither his comfort nor his happiness.
He was Robert Glass´s Romantic and he would obey his every whim.
He would stay put when he ordered him to. Watch how he took out his knife, or the belts, or the cane and the handcuffs and he would extend his wrists out and let him mark his body as he wished.
He would scream and shiver when he put the shock collar and slipped on the hood before leaving him tied in the basement for hours or even days, when he got sick of seeing his face.
He would go when he was called and smile when he ordered him to. He would take the beatings, the whipping and the tight ropes holding him in place for hours until his Master came to untie him and laugh when he plummeted to the ground made a shivering, crying mess behind the hood.
Despite all of it, he still held his hand, despite every second of screaming and begging, and rubbed raw wrists and ankles, he still called him Sirius sometimes.
Sometimes, when he wasn´t Sann, he would be kind. Sometimes, when they were alone on their way to another place, in the dark above the clouds, he would free him from his tight bindings. He would gently unbuckle the muzzle on his face and pull him up his lap to sooth his wedges and cuts and all the burns in his body.
“Quiet” the man would say as his stroke his cheek and slipped his hand down his thin shirt. Down his pants.
Sann would never admit now, sitting comfortably next to Al, head resting on his chest or chin on his shoulders, getting drunk in the fragrance of safety the albino induced, how Robert´s lips against his skin gave him goosebumps. How the man´s gentle shushing and hands felt like, when he played the game his father bought Sann for.
In the morning, he would be tied and muzzled all over again. However, when he got one second of solitude, Sann would pass his fingers over his lips. Wondering, if they could reach a point where the brusqueness of Sann´s kisses could be put aside for the gentleness of Sirius´s.
How much he had desired Robert to call him by the name of the person he longed for again, kissed the corner of his mouth and the tattooed lunars on his neck with affection Sann was forbidden from, and how earnestly, he had tried to keep him playing, to taste a little bit of the real love the man had to give, was his deepest secret.
It had been such a fierce desire, yet the dream cracked and crumbled when he took his voice.
By the time his Master took him to Zarai´s Christmas party and he met Albus, he had completely given up on getting kissed with love again.
It was slow, it took a while to stare at Albus with his shyness and odd ways of putting a smile on his face or tend invisible wounds he soothed with his presence alone, so the desire could ignite on his chest. Not the artificial warmth of letting his mind slip into the safety of his programming, but allow Sann, himself, to touch that flame and not burn on it.
Until one day, after Albus and Ma´am came from work, vibrating from accomplishment and pride, his happiness bled into him and Sann kissed him. He had seen how his face turned completely red but ended melting in his lips.
He wasn´t always sure if he was allowed to feel it as Sann, but with Albus, he didn´t have to whisper someone else´s name to hope there would be no pain later.
Being Sann was enough to be loved.
--
“I told you I´m not an artist” Sann said as Albus giggled at his fake, badly drawn mustache on the mirror.
They were once again alone at home, their owners going out for the weekend meant they had the house all to themselves and keys to go outside if they wished to. Sann had spent the whole weekend trying to teach Albus how to swim and laughing at his childish splashing. After so much time under the sun, a massive amount of freckles and small rashes had sprouted on their burnt skin, hence why they had rested the last day before their owners came back and applied sunscreen and cream on each other´s back before laying down in the couch. 
In Albus´ teasing about the new freckles in the other´s back, Sann had picked up the pen they had been using for an hour now to paint on each other´s skin.
“What do you say? Should I let one grow?” The other said looking at himself side by side. Sann stared at him for a long moment. In all the time since he had become Zarai´s property, he had never seen him use a razor.
“Can you?” he asked finally after a moment.
“Possibly not” he giggled taking the pen they had been using to doodle over their faces “But you would look handsome with a beard, should we try see?”
Sann shook his head as he swooshed away the other boy´s hands, unable to stop the smile on his face. Would he? His Master never let it grow, after all.
“Ok, ok. Give me your hand” Albus said extending his arm with a pen on the other. The taller boy looked at his hand and then at him, arching an eyebrow. “C´mon, it´s nothing bad, I swear” he flashed a little smile at him.
Sann put his hand on his, puzzled at the way the other watched and traced the burns and cuts extending all the way from the back of his hand to his forearm, more underneath the flamingo shirt he was wearing then. Webs of them hid from the view below his clothes when it was a “don´t wanna show” day.
His fingers ghosted the diagonal lines on his wrists and moved to the circular, old scars of cigarette burns, before doing that flip with his pen to settle it over his skin.
“Would you like something in particular?” Albus asked looking up at him through his lashes. White like the rest of him, hiding that beautiful gleam of red. Sann made a vague gesture as if saying go ahead and surprise him.
Albus was careful to not put too much pressure and the pen´s ink was cold, but after a while, he could find it almost soothing. Even better for Sann as he couldn´t get bored of seeing the other stick his tongue out just like every time he got completely focused.
“There, look” The other told him suddenly, just as his eyes went down to find the burns with blue lines that made them look like meteors, a few of the cuts made to look like an alien ship flying by, his own freckles made to look like stars, connected to other freckles with a pointed line. Right on the back of his hand, there was a telescope.
Sann passed his fingers over them with widened eyes and then his expression softened. Never thinking he would like to see the scars over his skin. He was not afraid of showing them, he didn´t care anymore, but he never thought they could be pretty to look at.
“Can you do the other?” Sann asked him with a warm feeling extending over his chest.
“If you let me paint a beard”
“Forget it”
“Oh, c´mon!” Albus laughed.
--
Being Zarai´s came with perks he would have called luxuries with his Master. A soft bed to sleep in where he wouldn´t be woken up to be dragged up the mattress and then tightly tied face down with his ass up in the middle of the night. That wouldn´t happen. He could sleep tangled up with Albus and he could be sure he wouldn’t wake up with an unusual pain in the back of his throat, but instead he would be woke up when the albino tried to leave the bed as silently as possible, but when he failed and Sann clung to his shirt, the albino would greet him with a kiss in his forehead and a whispered “good morning”.
Sann spent most of his time alone at the house. Carrying the three legged cat all around the house as he searched for things to do. He could swim at the pool and step out of the house whenever he wanted. He even had access to the TV, laptop and all the books at the studio. He had so much freedom suddenly, at the beginning he had knelt in the middle of the house and waited. Expecting it to be a game where Zarai would appear out of nowhere to punish him for his incredulity. He had rather play it safe. But a few months later, the scared boy was curled up in the sofa watching videos about how to build a hinge for a prosthetic leg for the cat purring in his lap. He still had the habit to look around every few minutes just to make sure nobody would come to hit him.
It had been a reflex to scrunch his eyes when Zarai pulled her hand up behind him one night. The woman and the albino were working in another project together and had stayed working until deep into the night. Sann had taken that time to make them company in the living room working on the latex prosthetic and was so focused on it, he hadn´t noticed it was already past three when Zarai tried to touch him.
He knew she wasn´t the type to hit her pets, he knew it and yet his breathing still got cut short when she called for him and the only thing he saw was her hand growing closer. He hadn´t even noticed he had put his arms around his head defensively until she called for him again.
“Sann?” she asked, gently pulling his arms away to see his terrified face. “I´m sorry, I didn´t mean to scare you” she said as the boy pulled his arms down slowly to sign sorry while shaking his head. “It´s kind of late already and my assistant is taking a break” she said nodding at the boy peacefully sleeping with his arms over the dining table with a blanket draped over his shoulders. “I´ll be working a bit longer, but I´ll need some help. Could you give me a hand, Sann?”
The pet´s eyes widened at her before giving a hesitating nod. After a while, Sann was sitting in the ground working on the spreadsheets scattered in the coffee table while Zarai revised her part of the work when Sann felt something fuzzy covering his shoulders. When he turned to see her, clinging to the blanket, the woman looked at him for a moment before slowly pulling her hand up to his hair. The boy flinched away slightly, but as her fingers ran through his hair smoothly, the boy let his defenses down one stroke at a time. Each stroke a little closer, making him a little less stiff, until finally, he leaned into her hand with closed eyes when she cupped his face in her hand.
For a second he doubted if he needed to go further, if it was necessary for him to show eagerness but after a second she simply went back to her work, her hand going back to her lap not looking for anything else to happen. In fact, the next time she touched him, it was only to put the slipping blanket back over his shoulders.
It was a warmth he had never had so freely given at Robert Glass´ mansion.
At his Master’s house, he would sit idly by the bed and wait for the guest to come inside the room, just as ordered. His knees were callous with how much he knelt, but his body still resisted to get used to the cold when wearing just the black leather harness and collar while waiting.
The first time he had serviced another person that wasn’t his Master by his orders, his heart thrummed on his ears like a war band. It had been with many people watching, many of who he had pleased right after the other. He had pleaded in vain, made them laugh when he begged to be forgiven and reserved to only his Master. His heart had raced and lost strength over and over, so many times now, that in the silence of the guest room on those nights he waited for the guest to come inside, it was calm.
A firm rhythm that stuttered whenever he heard steps outside. That smothered when they went away and beat with renewed strength, when the door opened to a face he hadn’t seen before, yet looked amused and pleased when they stared down at him.
His mind wondered sometimes, if the albino would ever look at him that way, but the thought quickly vanished.
There was one night he fled to the studio when nightmares came for him -Of past games his Master played with him and he had no chance of winning, nor of escaping the punishment for losing- when he knelt next to the couch and woke him up with ragged sobs and face filled with tears. The albino had rushed to straighten up and sat on the ground with him, allowing him to bury his face on his chest and cry.
After he had dried himself of tears to shed, when his cheeks were red and his eyes hurt from the strain on his head, he realized the thundering thrum of his heartbeat would be quiet.
Being held was a privilege back then, but with him, it was not earned by winning a game. Nor was expected to make his heart race all over again when sleeping together.
It was strange…a placebo, maybe, to have a pillow that prevented him from slipping his hand below the other boy´s waistband when training took over his judgement. It was a rule to have it between them if Albus was going to start sleeping with him and he was definitely trying his best to keep it that way, getting used to it was quick.
But after so many nights of being woken up to collect Sann on his arms, Albus was exhausted. He had forgotten to put the pillow between them and Sann had to shake him awake a few times so he could change and slip inside the bed. Still, he had an arm over his waist.
Sann´s heart picked up when Albus pressed himself against him. Feeling his face nuzzling against his back just making it drum harder. He could feel him so well, yet, he didn´t dare to move at all. He couldn´t even hear him over the loud ba-thump, ba-thump reverberating on his head.
The shock on those red eyes, cowering on the edge of the bed was something he never wanted to see again.
So when he jolted at the other´s half asleep groan, afraid he had moved, only to notice he was trying to retrieve the arm he was crushing underneath him, he giggled wryly.
He could hear his heart get quieter as the albino retrieved his arm, most probably numbed out, with half opened eyes, he brushed his cheek with his other hand and mumbled a thanks under his breath before going back to sleep.
Sann then tried to follow, taking his hand on his own and curling around it like a cat. Effectively stopping the wild drumming on his ears that become, ever so slowly, a soft murmur that melted with the sound of soft breathing.
17 notes · View notes
scripts4dreamers · 4 years ago
Text
I literally JUST sat down, pt. 6
Tumblr media
Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Seven
AN: Alone time with Spencer Reid isn’t something you’re ever willing to pass up.  Characters: Spencer Reid, Penelope Garcia, Derek Morgan, Aaron Hotchner, Jennifer Jareau, David Rossi. Pairings: Spencer Reid x reader Spoilers: None Warnings: Mentions of crime and violence, alcohol
---------------------------
“I could eat a horse,” Emily grumbled, collapsing into her seat on the jet, “when’s the last time we had solid food?”
JJ shook her head, “God, I don’t know. Maybe yesterday?”
“18:43 yesterday,” Spencer agreed, shooting you a tired smile as he took a seat beside you, “that’s when the call from Martin came in.”
Everyone nodded, remembering the frenzy that followed the call, everyone rushing to gather SWAT units, interviewing witnesses again, formulating a plan of attack and a de-escalation strategy. It had been a blur of movement and activity and that, combined with the nearly 10 hour standoff that followed had carried you for well over 24 hours, and left everyone hungry, tired and in desperate need of a shower.
“Ugh, I did not miss this part of the job,” you whined in time with a loud grumble from your stomach, “do you have any idea how many meals I missed when I was working at the bookstore? None! Not one. I had three meals a day and as many biscuits as I could eat,” you sighed nostalgically, “those were the good days.”
Emily moaned, “Ah, biscuits. Tell me more.”
You chuckled and shot her a fond look.
“You’ve got no idea what you’re missing, Emily,” Spencer cut in, “the biscuits Y/N makes are heaven. The ‘better than sex’ ones?” He rolled his eyes and groaned, a noise that made your cheeks flush and sent a bolt of surprise straight through you, “I dream about them.”
JJ hummed her agreement, closing her eyes as she reminisced, “I remember those, they’re Will’s favorite too.”
“That’s because Will has excellent taste,” you joked, shooting her a flirty wink, “in all things.”
Emily frowned, “Hey! Don’t flirt with her, keep telling me about these Better Than Sex biscuits.”
It had been nearly two weeks since the last big break in your case and, honestly, it was starting to grate on your nerves. No matter what you did it was like there was this massive clock counting down the days until another body would be dropped in your lap, probably with some other creepy detail on it; like your first pet’s name carved into the victim’s forehead. Garcia had been tracking down security camera footage from the shopping center you’d visited to buy your perfume, but there hadn’t been too much luck. A lot of the shops had already taped over their footage, and the ones that hadn’t had been grainy or awkwardly placed. All that they could reliably see was a tall man in a dark coat with a baseball cap on mirroring your movements in a few different stores.
Garcia was trying her best to enhance the images but, until she could, they were stuck. The only thing that helped your nerves was being on cases, and the fact that you almost always had someone with you to help keep you distracted.
“Well, they’re biscuits,” you smiled.
“And?” Emily pushed.
“And they’re better than sex,” you finished.
Emily rolled her eyes, but she was smiling as she did it, “That so?”
“I guess it depends on who you’re having sex with,” Spencer offered, meeting your eye for just a second, “in my experience they’re definitely better than casual meaningless sex, like a one night stand, but maybe not better than all sex.”
Your eyes widened and, much to your embarrassment, you felt yourself flush again. Spencer Reid and sex were two things that you worked very hard to keep separate in your mind. If they ever overlapped it happened in private and late at night, when no one was around to see your pupils dilate. You were a profiler. You were surrounded by profilers, and you’d learned long ago that the only way to keep secrets from a team like that was to make sure that your body language was stable and consistent at all times. Spencer Reid made that difficult. Spencer Reid casually talking about sex while his thigh was brushing up against yours made it damn near impossible.
“I need to try these biscuits,” Emily declared, “Y/N/N, will you make me some? Please?”
You snorted, “When? My shop’s closed indefinitely.”
“You can make them at my place,” Spencer said softly, just to you, “I haven’t used the oven in my apartment since...ever, I think, but it should work.”
“I’m-I’m staying at your place?”
Spencer shifted in his seat, “Yeah, it’s my turn. Garcia didn’t tell you?”
You made a mental note to shave Penelope’s eyebrows off at the earliest possible convenience in retaliation, but you kept your face neutral.
“No, she didn’t. Are you sure you’re okay with this, Spence? I don’t want to be a burden, and I know that you really value your privacy.” You asked, keeping your voice low.
Spencer smiled, something soft and fond glimmering in his dark eyes, “Of course I’m sure, Y/N. This is about keeping you safe.”
“I know but-“
“No!” Spencer interrupted with a laugh, “No buts. You’re staying at my place. Okay?”
You pressed your lips together, a million different arguments fighting for prominence in your mind.
“Okay?” Spencer repeated.
You deflated, “Fine. Okay.”
He leaned back in his seat and gave you a smug smile as he opened the book he’d brought with him. War and Peace, in the original Russian of course. It was a painfully nostalgic image and you felt your eyes start to droop with exhaustion.
“You’re impossible,” you yawned, “you know that?”
He smiled, “Yeah, yeah I know, Y/N. Get some rest, I’ll still be impossible when you wake up.”
You hummed, feeling a rush of comfort and warmth as you let sleep drag you under.
“Night, Reid,” you mumbled.
——————————-
Spencer was weirdly nervous as he fumbled for his apartment keys. It was stupid, of course, you’d been to his apartment before. Hell, you’d practically lived there in the weeks after Maeve’s death, but something about this felt...different. Maybe it was that he knew that you were in danger, and because of that you being there felt like an act of trust. Maybe he was nervous that he hadn’t cleaned up enough, or that you’d spent the entire flight with your head on his shoulder. Maybe he was worried that his oven actually didn’t work and he’d gotten your hopes up for nothing. Maybe it was-
“Spencer,” you said with a gentle laugh, “I can hear the cogs in your brain whirling. Calm down, everything’s going to be alright, I’ve seen your place before.”
Spencer smiled and he felt the tension start to ease out of his shoulders. Maybe it was just because it was you. The key finally slid into the door and he welcomed you in, grabbing your suitcase with one hand as he went.
“Welcome to Casa Reid,” he said, “ignore the books, unless you want to read any of them of course. You remember where my room is, right?”
You shot him a look, “What? No! Spence I’m already intruding on your fortress of solitude, I’m not taking your bedroom too.” You flopped down onto his couch, crossing your legs on the cushion and your arms across your chest with a determined glint in your eyes, “I’ll be right here if you need me.”
He rolled his eyes fondly, “Really, Y/N/N? This is the hill you want to die on? I know you’re as tired as I am. Wouldn’t it be nice to just collapse into a soft bed?”
“I’m sure it would be,” you agreed, “you’ll have to tell me all about it tomorrow morning.” You pushed yourself up and grabbed your suitcase from his hands with a sweet smile, “I would love a shower though. Maybe when I’m done you’ll have thought of a clever comeback? If not,” you shrugged, “we’ll get dinner.”
And with that you strode off in the direction of Spencer’s bathroom, shooting him one last playful smile as you went. As soon as you were out of sight Spencer sighed happily, collapsing onto the couch you’d just vacated and listening as the shower switched on. He was tired, bone tired; he was starving, he was thirsty and there was a dull sort of pressure in his temple that might have been the start of a headache, but despite all that he didn’t care. He was happy, almost giddy really, and that was enough. While the sound of the shower echoed through his apartment, Spencer let himself start to drift off.
-------------------------
The moment you were done talking Spencer’s world went quiet. All around him he could see his friends’ mouths moving, their shocked faces burned into his mind as they begged you for answers, but it was like they were on the other end of a really long corridor and he couldn’t quite make out their actual words. Instead there was just this rushing in his ears and the pounding of his heart, just a little too loud, as he tried to process the idea of his world without you in it.
“I’m leaving,” he heard you say again and again, like a stuck record in the back of his mind, “I handed in my resignation a while ago. I’m just here to pack up my things.”
For some reason that didn’t seem right. It didn’t seem right that you could be “leaving” and then be gone for good on the same day. It was too fast, Spencer hadn’t had time. Time to process, to think, to convince you to stay, to come with you, to tell you how he felt, to cry, to yell, to throw things, to laugh to-
“We’ll still see each other,” you lied through a sheepish smile, “this doesn’t have to be goodbye forever. Just goodbye for now.”
Spencer shook his head, his eyes trained on the patch of floor just between your feet like if he stared long enough it might give him the answer. The answer to what? It didn’t matter. He vaguely heard Garcia complaining in her own way, and JJ asking you to reconsider but, still, it was like it was happening to someone else. You’re dissociating, the rational part of his brain supplied, you’re dissociating because you can’t cope with losing someone you care about, you can’t cope with losing Y/N. He pushed the thought away, forcing it into a box somewhere in the very back of his mind as he fought to stay in control in the moment. Oh wow, Spencer Reid has abandonment issues, he thought to himself, how original.
“Excuse me,” he muttered, hoping it was too low for anyone to hear as he turned on his heel and walked straight out of the conference room.
As he went he could feel the sets of eyes on his back and the heavy weight of a mixture of confusion and pity they brought with them. For once he didn’t care. All that mattered was that his eyes were stinging and his chest was tight and, no matter what happened you couldn’t see him cry like this. He couldn’t let you see him break down because, the second that you did, he would be found out. You would put your arm on his shoulder and say something kind and he would look into your eyes and….you’d know. You’d see all the pain and the fear and the betrayal and you’d know in an instant how desperately and completely Spencer had fallen for you. And that couldn’t happen, it just couldn’t.
——————————-
Spencer sighed, shaking his head to snap himself out of the sad reminiscing. His heart was strangely heavy at the memory and he swallowed hard past the growing lump in his throat. That had been a hard day, but it had been nothing compared to what had come next. Showing up at work everyday and being met with your empty desk, the suffocating absence of your laughter, your voice, Derek and JJ trying desperately to compensate, Emily’s sullenness, even Garcia and her constant little check ins. Everything they did just made it more obvious that you weren’t there, that you’d really left, and that you were never coming back.
He looked towards his bedroom without meaning to, subtly reminding himself that you were there and that he wasn’t on his own anymore.
For now, the cynical voice in the back of his mind whispered. Until this case is solved and she packs up and leaves again like nothing happened. Then it’ll be just like it was before. Except that that wasn’t true. No, this time it’d be worse.
------------------------------
Spencer fiddled with the strap of his satchel, working his jaw as he tried to get up the nerve to either walk into the bookshop or turn and leave for good. It had been nearly four months since he’d last seen you, but you still texted regularly and sent him pictures of the store whenever you could. Not that it ever felt like enough. Four months of fighting himself and trying to figure out what the right thing to do was. Should he chase after you and beg you to come back? Should he offer to help around the bookstore in his free time? What did he want from you? What was his endgame here?
For a long while Spencer just watched you through the glass as the questions whirled around his head like a hurricane. You looked happy, he noticed as you laughed at something one of your employees said, like you were in your element. There was a peacefulness about the way you moved here too, like there was no hurry, like you had all the time in the world. It had been a long time since he’d seen you that happy. Not since that night, the one he wasn’t supposed to think about anymore. Not since he’d ruined everything and set your friendship on a collision course with disaster. You’d never said so, but Spencer knew that that night was why you left. He knew it was his fault, even if you didn’t want to admit it.
He sighed, fighting down a sudden rush of bitterness that tasted like ashes in his mouth. Something about seeing you, really seeing you again,brought all the hurt and confusion of that night back to the surface. Maybe it was just that it felt real now, final, like something that was always meant to happen the way it had. Something he had no control over. But you were happy, he reminded himself, and that was all he really wanted, right?
Spencer felt something in his chest splinter and, while his resolve was still firm, he turned on his heel and walked away. It wasn’t his place, he told himself again and again as he walked, he had no right.
-------------------------------
“Spence?” You asked, your worried voice cutting straight through his daydream like a knife, “are you okay?”
His head whipped around and he felt the knot of anxiety in his chest loosen as he took you in. Your hair was wet from the shower, your skin dewy and soft-looking beneath your pajamas. You looked calm and strong, and so painfully familiar that Spencer felt something near his heart swell with appreciation. So he brought his attention back, leaving the mistakes of the past alone for the time being so that he could better enjoy the present. He was home, and you were safe and for a moment everything was right in the world.
“Yeah,” he answered with a smile, “yeah I’m good. I-uh-I didn’t want to order dinner before you were finished because I didn’t ask what you wanted.”
You relaxed ever so slightly, “Hmmm,” you started, making your way over to the couch and plopping down next to him like it was the most natural thing in the world, “how about pizza?”
Spencer smiled, “I could do pizza. What kind do you want?” he asked, pulling out his phone to place the order.
“Ohhhh no,” you replied, shaking your head, “no, no, no. I’m not falling for that one again, Doctor Reid,” you joked, “I will not have you topping shame me in my own home.”
“In your own home?” Spencer laughed, “Oh, so this is officially your home now?”
“For the next few days yes, it is,” you shot back smugly, followed by, “I’ll have whatever you’re having, but no mushrooms.”
“Since when do you hate mushrooms?”
“Since now, duh,” you replied with a shrug, “seriously though, so long as it’s warm and filling, I really don’t mind.”
“Two warm and filling pizza’s coming right up,” Spencer said, “Garcia leant me some movies to watch as well if you want.”
Joking around with you the way he always had was an equal measure of comforting and bizarre, but Spencer wasn’t going to question it. As you bickered back and forth about whether or not Legally Blonde was the best courtroom film ever made, he tried to shake off the slight sadness in his chest. It was impossible. Every time he made you laugh or saw the edges of your eyes crinkle with a smile he was reminded of that empty desk, and the hole in his chest, and the way losing you felt like losing an arm. It wasn’t your fault, you were being your usual incredible self, but that was sort of the problem. Small acts of kindness to you, like grabbing a blanket and throwing it over both of your legs without a second thought, were just that, small acts of kindness. But to Spencer they were like patches of warm sunlight when he’d been expecting cold weather. It was painful. By the time the pizza had arrived, he’d changed into pajamas and you’d convinced him to watch Legally Blonde, he thought he had it under control. Or at least under control enough that you wouldn’t notice. He was wrong.
Less than fifteen minutes into the movie you pressed pause, turning to face him on the couch with a determined look on your face.
“Okay, spill it.” You demanded, “What’s wrong?”
“What?” he asked, heat creeping into his cheeks, “I don’t-what?”
“You went somewhere,” you explained, “somewhere in your head. You only do that when something’s bothering you.”
“Nothing’s bothering me, Y/N, I just-”
“Spence,” you interrupted, scooching closer and staring into his eyes pleadingly, “please don’t lie to me. I know you too well for that to work. Just tell me what’s wrong, is it me? Did I do something?”
“No.” Spencer said quickly, desperate to wipe that sad look off your face “No, Y/N/N you didn’t do anything I’m just-I’m not-” he took a deep breath in, thinking through his words, “I’m not sure...how to do this, exactly.”
You tilted your head, confused but, to his relief, didn’t shut him down.
“How to do what?” You asked sincerely, “Watch Legally Blonde? I know it’s not exactly your style but-”
“No,” he laughed softly, “no, not the movie. I don’t know how to be here, with you,” he admitted, “like this. Everytime I think I’ve got it, I remember what it was like without you and I just-” he shook his head, “I shut down. I pull away, and I don’t want to, I want to be here because you’re my friend and I care about you. It’s just that everytime I try….”
“You imagine what it’ll be like to lose me,” you supplied, sadly.
“I don’t imagine it, Y/N, I remember it.” He said, “All those years of seeing you every single day and suddenly you were just gone, and I couldn’t handle it. I kept expecting you to just walk back in one day, or that I’d wake up and the whole thing would just have been some weird fever dream, but it never did. The months just stretched on and on and on and-” he met your eye, “and now you’re back, and everything’s great again, but it’s been more than a year and, I don’t know, I guess I just don’t want to get my hopes up.”
The admission made Spencer feel lighter, like a weight had been lifted from his chest but, when he met your eye, his heart sank just a little bit. You pressed your lips together into a thin line, sniffing as you fought back tears. But they were angry tears, Spencer realised. You were sad, but you were also furious, and it made him swallow hard.
“Spencer, I don’t know how many times I can apologise,” you finally started, “I should’ve given you more warning, I shouldn’t have kept how I was feeling a secret, I know that now,” you continued, “but you didn’t lose me. Nobody lost me. I lost you. I lost my family, my job, my second home, the entire community of people I’d built up, all of it. I was alone, really alone, and starting from scratch in a city I barely recognized because I’d spent the last however many years flying around the country and completely neglecting most of the city I actually lived in. I also discovered that, outside of the BAU, I have exactly two friends, neither of whom live in the state so, at first, I spent 99% of my time just sitting in my apartment crying over what a huge terrible irreversible mistake I’d made and eating cookies.” You explained. Spencer opened his mouth to interrupt but, before he could, you shot him a pleading look, and he let you continue, “And I know it must’ve sucked, not having me around. I know you must have felt completely hurt and betrayed and confused, and I swear to you, I’m not trying to minimize that at all. All I’m trying to say is...it wasn’t easy for me. I didn’t just step out of those doors into some sunny, perfect idyllic life where all I did was bake cookies and read books. It was hard. I worked hard, and I don’t want to have to feel bad about that.”
You looked so sad in that moment that Spencer wanted to cry. He had never truly considered the implications of leaving the BAU, of how hard it must’ve been starting over when being in the FBI had always been your dream. Instinctively, he reached out and took your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze, just so you knew he was there.
“I don’t want that either,” Spencer promised, “I’ve only ever wanted you to be happy, Y/N.”
You nodded, wiping your eyes as a few stray tears slipped down your cheeks, “I know that, Spence, I do. I just-” You let out a deep breath and seemed to pull yourself together, squeezing his hand in return, “it felt like the only person who cared about me was Garcia,” you admitted, “and so, coming back, I was really scared. I didn’t quite know what I was walking into. I thought I knew, but I wasn’t sure so I just-” you shrugged, “acted like nothing had changed. And maybe that’s my fault but-”
“It’s not your fault,” he interrupted, feeling a swell of protectiveness ballooning in his chest, “none of us knew how to handle a situation like this.”
“But I should’ve considered how weird this must be for you,” you insisted, “I should’ve known that you-that you’d need more time, or more space from me than the others.”
“I don’t want space,” he said earnestly, “I promise you, Y/N, the last thing I want is to be away from you again. I’ve made that mistake once and it didn't work out too well.
You gave him a watery laugh and Spencer felt his spirit lift just a little. It was crazy how simple everything became in Spencer’s mind when you needed him, how easily he could be open and vulnerable without fear. It was you, he’d do anything for you, even bare his soul to make you laugh.
“I guess, what I’m trying to say,” You continued, “is that I’m scared. I’m so scared that, the minute this case is over, I’ll be alone again, starting from scratch, with nothing but two Murder Storefronts that no one is going to want to come within one hundred feet of, and you guys will just go on without me.”
Spencer smiled and tugged you close, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into a tight hug.
“That’s not going to happen, Y/N/N,” he promised.
“How do you know?” You whispered into his hair.
“Because,” he replied honestly, “I won’t let it.”
-----------------------------------
Taglist: @ourfavoritesergeantbarnes, @confused-and-really-hungry, @word-scribbless, @reidloversisforever, @ashookykooky, @l0ve-0f-my-life, @shilohpug, @tangerinenotions95, @petitchatonbleu, @pirateismywayofspeaking, @must-be-a-weasley-92, @whovianayesha,  @holding-on-to-my-youth, @quie-pls, @fear-less-write-more, @astraea-writes, @mac99martin, @levylovegood, @easygoingtheatre, @purpleraindrops, @eevee0722, @bisexualdisaster106, @sgold, @openheart12​, @poisondragon​, @martinafigoli​, @ellegreenawayapologist​
199 notes · View notes
firstfullmoon · 5 years ago
Note
sorry if this has been asked before, but what are your favorite quotes about (romantic) love?
• “I love you. I want us both to eat well.” 
— Christopher Citro, from “Our Beautiful Life When It’s Filled with Shriek”
• “You kiss the back of my legs and I want to cry. Only the sun has come this close, only the sun.”
— Shauna Barbosa, from “GPS”
• “August. We were arguing. You want love to be like this every day don’t you? 92 degrees even in the shade.”
“I used to be a hopeless romantic. I am still a hopeless romantic. I used to believe that love was the highest value. I still believe that love is the highest value. I don’t expect to be happy. I don’t imagine that I will find love, whatever that means, or that if I do find it, it will make me happy. I don’t think of love as the answer or the solution. I think of love as a force of nature - as strong as the sun, as necessary, as impersonal, as gigantic, as impossible, as scorching as it is warming, as drought-making as it is life-giving. And when it burns out, the planet dies.”
“If love is going to be done differently I will have to do it. I don’t mean as a messiah-thing, I mean as a me-thing. I want to look into your eyes and not get blown up. I want you to see me as I am and not destroy me. I don’t want to retreat into plant life, or have the same bad dream every night. I don’t want to watch a city burn because I was there.”
— Jeanette Winterson
• “I’ll take care of you. / It’s rotten work. / Not to me. Not if it’s you.”
— from Anne Carson’s translation of Orestes
• “I think of you all the time and therefore have little to say that would not embarrass you, for instance my first feeling about the rain was that it was like you.”
— John Cage, from a letter to Merce Cunningham
• “I want you to know, if you ever read this, there was a time when I would rather have had you by my side than any one of these words; I would rather have had you by my side than all the blue in the world.”
— Maggie Nelson, Bluets
• “I want to be a village full of sweethearts, / as you are, every second of the day, / cooking me soups & drawing me pictures / & holding me, my inexplicable & elephant sadness, / with your infinite arms. / But isn’t it true, you are not / always why I am happy. & I promise / it is true, you are almost never why, / why I am sad.”
— Chen Chen, from “Elegy for My Sadness”
• “Look here Vita—throw over your man, and we’ll go to Hampton Court and dine on the river together and walk in the garden in the moonlight and come home late and have a bottle of wine and get tipsy, and I’ll tell you all the things I have in my head, millions, myriads — They won’t stir by day, only by dark on the river. Think of that. Throw over your man, I say, and come.”
“I always have such need to merely talk to you. Even when I have nothing to talk about – with you I just seem to go right ahead and sort of invent it. I invent it for you. Because I never seem to run out of tenderness for you and because I need to feel you near.”
“I could only think of you as being very distant and beautiful and calm. A lighthouse in clean waters.”
“What can one say — except that I love you and I’ve got to live through this strange quiet evening thinking of you sitting alone. Dearest — let me have a line… You have given me such happiness…”
— Virginia Woolf, from letters to Vita Sackville-West
• “I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone. I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defences. And I don’t really resent it.” 
“Please, in all this muddle of life, continue to be a bright and constant star. Just a few things remain as beacons: poetry, and you, and solitude.”
— Vita Sackville-West, from letters to Virginia Woolf
• “Love is awful. It’s awful. It’s painful. It’s frightening. It makes you doubt yourself, judge yourself, distance yourself from the other people in your life. It makes you selfish. It makes you creepy, makes you obsessed with your hair, makes you cruel, makes you say and do things you never thought you would do. It’s all any of us want, and it’s hell when we get there. So no wonder it’s something we don’t want to do on our own. I was taught if we’re born with love then life is about choosing the right place to put it. People talk about that a lot, feeling right, when it feels right it’s easy. But I’m not sure that’s true. It takes strength to know what’s right. And love isn’t something that weak people do. Being a romantic takes a hell of a lot of hope. I think what they mean is, when you find somebody that you love, it feels like hope.“
— Phoebe Waller-Bridge, in Fleabag
• “i carry your heart with me(i carry it inmy heart)”
— e.e. cummings, from “[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]”
• “There was once a very great American surgeon named Halsted. He was married to a nurse. He loved her-immeasurably. One day Halsted noticed that his wife’s hands were chapped and red when she came back from surgery. And so he invented rubber gloves. For her. It is one of the great love stories in medicine. The difference between inspired medicine and uninspired medicine is love. When I met Ana I knew: I loved her to the point of invention.”
— Sarah Ruhl, The Clean House
• “oh god it’s wonderful / to get out of bed / and drink too much coffee / and smoke too many cigarettes / and love you so much”
— Frank O’Hara, from “Steps”
• “This morning there’s snow everywhere. We remark on it. You tell me you didn’t sleep well. I say I didn’t either. You had a terrible night. “Me too.” We’re extraordinarily calm and tender with each other as if sensing the other’s rickety state of mind. As if we knew what the other was feeling. We don’t, of course. We never do. No matter. It’s the tenderness I care about. That’s the gift this morning that moves and holds me. Same as every morning.”
— Raymond Carver, from “The Gift”
• “Well Marianne, it’s come to this time when we are really so old and our bodies are falling apart and I think I will follow you very soon. Know that I am so close behind you that if you stretch out your hand, I think you can reach mine.”
— Leonard Cohen, in a letter to Marianna Ihlen
• “I think about love on a scale from 1 to 10. Most of us find a 6 or a 7, and that’s why we have divorce. It’s the truth. We settle for that 6 or 7. But I like to think Kevin is Chiron’s 10. He’s found that and he realizes that there’s no reason to settle for a 6 or a 7 because, “I know this person is my 10. Whether or not this person believes I’m his 10, I’m going to devote my life to this person entirely.” That’s why the line where he says, “You’re the only man that’s ever touched me,” for me, was the most amazing, most beautiful thing I’ve seen in cinema, period. Because that’s what we strive for as people, to find that one person because they’re there. If Kevin doesn’t feel that they should be together, Chiron is just going to die a miserable person because that’s his person and he won’t settle for anything else.“
— Trevante Rhodes about Moonlight
• “I look at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world”
— Frank O’Hara, from “Having a Coke with You” but the whole poem is !
• “The door slammed and someone came home and low voices could be heard, the single lilt of a question as it rose, “How was it?” or “Are you hungry?” Something plain and necessary, yet extra, with care, a voice like those tiny roofs over the phone booths along the train tracks, the ones made from the same shingles used for houses, except only four rows wide—just enough to keep the phone dry. And maybe that’s all I wanted—to be asked a question and have it cover me, like a roof the width of myself.”
— Ocean Vuong, from On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous
• “I keep wishing for you, keep shutting up my eyes and looking toward the sky, asking with all my might for you, and yet you do not come. I thought of you, until the world grew rounder than it sometimes is, and I broke several dishes.”
— Emily Dickinson, in a letter to Minnie Holland
• “I don’t want you to be nervous. Maybe thinking of a walrus would help. Have you seen the video of the penguin accidentally stepping on a sleeping walrus? It thought it was a rock. The walrus wakes up like what the fuck and the penguin scurries off like oh shit. Sometimes it’s funny watching a surprise happen, and not just funny but kind of amazing — like, you never really know what’s what when it comes to this planet.
Then again, when it’s you getting surprised, that’s different. Especially for tender ones like us. What are we supposed to do? It’s bad for our hearts, you know. I hope you won’t need pills like I do. I think I get so scared because I’m greedy — I want to hold onto everything, the world wants to take it away. What the fuck. The number of hours we have together is actually not so large. Please linger near the door uncomfortably instead of just leaving. Please forget your scarf in my life and come back later for it.”
— Mikko Harvey, “For M”
• “Willem sleeps on the left side of the bed, and he on the right, and the first night they slept in the same bed, he turned to his right on his side, the way he always did, and Willem pressed up against him, tucking his right arm under his neck and then across his shoulders, and his left arm around his stomach, moving his legs between his legs. He was surprised by this, but once he overcame his initial discomfort, he found he liked it, that it was like being swaddled. One night in June, however, Willem didn’t do it, and he worried he had done something wrong. The next morning–early mornings were the other time they talked about the things that seemed too tender, too difficult, to be said in the daylight–he asked Willem if he was upset with him, and Willem, looking surprised, said no, of course not. “I just wondered,” he began, stammering, “because last night you didn’t–” But he couldn’t finish the sentence; he was too embarrassed. But then he could see Willem’s expression clear, and he rolled into him and wrapped his arms around him. “This?” he asked, and he nodded. “It was just because it was so hot last night, Willem said, and he waited for Willem to laugh at him, but he didn’t. “That’s the only reason, Judy.” Since then, Willem has held him in the same way every night, even through July, when not even the air-conditioning could erase the heaviness from the air, and when they both woke damp with sweat. This, he realizes, is what he wanted from a relationship all along. This is what he meant when he hoped he might someday be touched.”
— Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life
• “No, I didn’t imagine my being alone with you the way you do. If I want the impossible, I want it in its entirety. Entirely alone, dearest, I wanted us to be entirely alone on this earth, entirely alone under the sky, and to lead my life, my life that is yours, without distraction and with complete concentration, in you.”
— Franz Kafka, from a letter to Felice Bauer
• “If I could attach our blood vessels so we could become each other I would. If I could attach our blood vessels in order to anchor you to the earth, to this present time, I would. If I could open up your body and slip inside your skin and look out your eyes and forever have my lips fused with yours, I would.”
— David Wojnarowicz, The Half-Life
• “I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell, I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”
— Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles
• “If Moses had seen the way my friend’s face blushes when he’s drunk, and his beautiful curls and wonderful hands, he would not have written in his Torah: do not lie with a man”
— Rabbi Yehuda Al-Harizi/Judah Ben Solomon Harizi
• “I’ll rob the bank that gave you the impression that money is more fruitful than words, and I’ll cut holes in the ozone if it means you have one less day of rain. I’ll walk you to the hospital, I’ll wait in a white room that reeks of hand sanitizer and latex for the results from the MRI scan that tries to locate the malady that keeps your mind guessing, and I want to write you a poem every day until my hand breaks and assure you that you’ll find your place, it’s just the world has a funny way of hiding spots fertile enough for bodies like yours to grow roots. I hope our ghosts aren’t eating you alive. If i’m to speak for myself, I’ll tell you that the universe is twice as big as we think it is and you’re the only one that made that idea less devastating.”
— Lucas Regazzi, from “Small”
• “I thought she was sleeping until I heard her call out from across the room, “Will you bring me a glass of water?” I did. Then in her always-sleepy tone and drawl she said, “Do you remember when you were a little girl and you would ask your mama to bring you a glass of water?” Yeah. “You know how half the time you weren’t even thirsty. You just wanted that hand that was attached to that glass that was attached to that person you just wanted to stay there until you fell asleep.” She took the glass of water that I brought her and just sat it down full on the table next to her. Wow, I thought. What am I gonna do with love like this.”
— Dito Montiel, One Night
897 notes · View notes
isolctions · 4 years ago
Text
“ILYSSA” + past lives.
Tumblr media
................*just throws up peace sign*
no but really, y’all know clear & concise hc posts are Not The Vibe here and nothing makes sense n this likely won’t, either. it don’t even make sense to me & i’ve been writing this entity since 2016. anyway, let’s get started. trigger warnings do apply for descriptions of body horror, mentions of death, natural disasters, plagues and the like, & a lil’ sprinkle of creepy supernatural horror elements.
THE CREATOR — i tried leaving any one specific religion out of her development, bc it really doesn’t even play that huge of a role in her life & aspen’s life, so i always thought of The Creator as a well-known-but-not kind of entity. The Creator created...everything, obviously. all beings, all forms of live, all dimensions and everything in between, including The Void that comes up later. there’s no specific gender, name or details, just The Creator. ilyssa was once a child of The Creator, birthed as an Angel, assigned with certain tasks such as maintaining The Creator’s life forms in a designated area, & ilyssa’s assignment was Earth & its’ inhabitants.
FIRST LIFE — ilyssa no longer remembers any clear details of her first life as an angel. doesn’t recall her name or her appearance, just certain sensations that she felt that lasted throughout her existence. she wasn’t exactly a guardian angel bc she wasn’t allowed to interfere with any of The Creator’s plans or engage with any of the life forms on earth, simply observe & report. and she was so good at her job too, and she was a fairly well known Angel among The Creator’s many children, and she was complete with the warmth of a glowing halo & the weight of shimmering wings & light in her heart & the absolute horror of multiple eyes and an elongated but welcoming mouth. very reminiscent of biblical angels. mildly terrifying. she more or less followed the rules bc let’s face it, Earth & its’ inhabitants were super boring for the first few thousand years. but they started getting so creative! it was so fun seeing them grow! she slowly felt tempted to see what it was like on this big place for herself, so occasionally, she’d disguise herself and walk among humans for a while. if any other Angels took notice of her sneaking off to earth every now and then, they never said anything abt it.
THE FUCKENING — several thousand years later, nothing but sickness and plague and despair filled Earth & its’ inhabitants. ilyssa was very confused. for all time, she watched as humans suffered and animals perished and places burned and volcanoes erupted & buried cities in ash or oceans with floods, and there was...nothing? she could do about it??? she felt compelled to end their suffering in any way she could, including (not so sneakily) sneaking back to earth to give them blessings to ease their woes, but The Creator reminded her that it was not her place to do such a thing. why? because it was all part of the plan, of course! divine intervention was not to be tolerated, no matter how much she found humans to be cute little things. and ilyssa was complicit for a while simply because she didn’t want to cause a rift between herself and her creator, but then humans kept fucking suffering — even those who didn’t deserve it. and she kept asking questions and kept demanding to put a stop to such cruelty and begged The Creator to step in and help, and they refused. finally, The Creator got fed up. ripped the wings out of her back, stripped her title as an Angel, and banished her to lifetimes of solitude. she was fated to fall, halo broken, and would never interact or interfere again.
THE VOID + OTHER 79 THOUSAND LIVES — banishment wasn’t the only punishment. nope. The Creator took it a step further by destroying any sense of identity that ilyssa once had, by condemning her to constant death & rebirth at the hands of the Void, with each rebirth shaping her into an entirely different being. the first few millennia that passed within the Void, she literally didn’t have a fucking face. she was nothing more than a featureless shadow stuck in an empty wasteland, only seeing life within the crystals & color that made up each of her rebirths. while in the Void, many things happened, such as: slowly birthing with more distinctive features (later becoming her present True Form: twelve pitch black eyes that form an hourglass looking shape on her face, a stretched out mouth with razor sharp teeth, sharpened claws, four arms & bony, elongated limbs. she also shrieks, has multiple voices, has No Nose, & is super fucking tall. just store that in ur brain for later babes!), figuring out that there are a multitude of dimensions that exist, ripping into said dimensions & rearranging timelines for funsies/to piss off The Creator, forgot her true name, was killed/reborn like 80 thousand times prbly, & finally harbored absolute, unfiltered, unwavering hatred for all humans. also realized that falling made her feel so painfully cold and empty, and the closest thing to feeling whole were to consume the soul of a human. definitely made some enemies, bc u don’t just waltz into an alternate dimension & eat every living human there without pissing off a few other entities.
80 THOUSAND — eventually, ilyssa figured out a few hiding spots to avoid The Creator’s wrath & spied on different dimensions. earth, specifically, bc she liked to project nightmares onto humans & consume their souls via sleep paralysis / pass through them & possess them until their bodies died off. ilyssa gave up on trying to name herself bc let’s face it, The Creator was just gonna get the Void to hunt her down & kill whatever body she’d been created in for the next thousand years anyway. life literally had no meaning until aspen was born.
MEMORABLE DETAILS — her true form, obviously. only named herself bc while attempting to communicate with aspen via projecting a night terror, aspen called to her by making a noise that sounded like a name so she just fucking rolled with it and went by ilyssa. prbly does not immediately like any other Angels, and will act very antagonistic towards more ‘pure’ beings out of resentment. kind of dig the idea that there are a few Angels that remember her / she remembers fondly from first life that she’s less likely to attack. her style of ‘hunting’ victims by tiring them out via chasing / wounding them comes from The Creator’s method of killing off her current life while in the Void, bc they’re one cruel motherfucker, let me tell u. and just for technicality’s sake, i guess you could say that she’s not exactly a demon? not in the pure sense, anyhow? but over time, that’s what she’s been known as by humans who managed to survive any night terror encounters from her, so most methods won’t deter her. (she still cannot physically pass through most holy spaces, bc The Creator or other watcher Angels keep her out.) in the most non romantic sense, aspen is very much ilyssa’s first true love, bc she is the only thing she’s ever felt any intense sensation or urge to protect towards. this can & will grow into feeling love for other humans as well, wink wink nudge. was prbly NOT intended to ever reproduce, so aspen being pregnant with ilyssa’s offspring (in her current form before this lifespan gets killed n what have you) is something that was NOT planned by The Creator, should NOT even be possible, and they are VERY confused and UPSET!!!! >:(
anyways, the only reason i suddenly decided to change ilyssa’s direction & give her a backstory involving actually having been an angel (other than how deeply she cares for aspen & how she’s come to softening her hatred for humans post-asp) is because of this goddamn post right here. read it. feel it. let it make u cry. ok that’s all thank u all for listening to this dumpster fire of a post <3
6 notes · View notes