#but the point is the rant and the feeling behind it
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Nanami Kento breeding his wife. nsfw, mdni!
Some thoughts that keep me entertained at work lmao, so might be full of mistakes. English is not my first language and all that yk.
Couldn't stand the thought of not having any smut of this man in my page since he is the love of my life.
His cock drills into your cunt, again and again, in and out, in and out. His tip kisses your cervix with each single slam of his hips, legs folded so your knees press against your boobs.
Kento has you in the meanest matting press, big hands pressing at the back of your full thighs surely leaving red or even purple marks.
"Don't see you laughing anymore, pretty. What happened?" And no, you're not laughing, fat tears stream down your flushed cheeks instead.
"Fuck- look at that mmmphf!" He groans, narrow eyes zeroing in how his girth is being sucked in by your cunt. A ring of cum, both his and yours, on the base of his dick, each time he bottoms out it sticks messily to your folds. It's so lewd, even your mound and his pubis are stained with it.
"Hah- gonna stuff this soft tummy full of my cum, hmm? Get my pretty wife pregnant. Isn't that what you wanted?"
It had all started earlier that afternoon, while he was at work. You had attempted to pull one of your little pranks on him, sending a picture of a fake positive pregnancy test. Little did you know that your husband had been having a sever case of baby fever and that had been his last straw.
He had felt joyful, completely thrilled for becoming a dad, or that was until you sent another message. Laughing it off, saying it was just a joke.
Well, he had a mission now. He was going to put a baby inside you, so next time that positive wouldn't be a little prank of yours, but a real one.
It's been two hours since he got home from work, two hours of him pulling orgasm after orgasm out of you and himself. And still his cock was hard and twitching inside you. Hitting that spot within that made you see sparks behind your eyelids, stretching you to full capacity.
"K-kentooooo..." You whine. Hot and fresh tears spilling from your eyes, rolling down your flushed cheeks until you can taste the salty flavor on your lips. "Can't- can't take it anymore-!"
"Hmm? But you're about to cum... Lying again?" And he is right, he can see it in how your toes are curling, feel it in how you grip his cock from the inside. He knows when his wife is about to orgasm.
And just to proof his point one of his hands uncurls from your ankle. Gold and cold wedding ring caressing your folds, right above where he's pounding you. He caresses from down to up a couple times, getting the alliance stained with your juices before replacing it by his thumb. He flickers your clit, slowly but with pressure. And when you mewl he laughs.
"See? She never lies." And he's referring to your pussy. "Come on, give it to me baby- ah! You can do it- can fucking do it my love!"
That's all it takes, his raspy moany voice cooing you to cum. How could you disobey? Of course the moment those words spill his mouth you're creaming his dick again. Shaking and whimpering so adorably, making his heart flutter. Oh, he can't wait to see you all plump and round with his child.
Kento is peppering you soaked face with butterfly kisses, on your nose, on your cheeks, on your eyelids. And of course on your glossy lips. His whole weight now pinning you down on the mattress.
"There you go, so good so so sooo good for me- my wife mmmphf-!" He's gonna cum too, his hips are getting more erratic, more sloppy, more feral. "Gonna cum, my love. Gonna put my baby in you, yes? Make you my beautiful pregnant wife- fuckfuck- you're gonna look so b-beautiful... I love you sooo much-" He's ranting, praises spilling through clenched teeth as if they were curses. In between small pecks here and there.
He cums right after, stilling his body as he buries his girth to the hilt. Rope after rope of hot seed right into your womb. And of course he doesn't pull out after no, he remains inside you. Not allowing one single drop going to waste.
He's gotta breed you afterall, right?
#nanami kento#jujustsu kaisen x reader#anime#jujutsu nanami#nanami smut#jjk smut#jjk nanami#nanami x reader
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Bit ooc but I have a question. How you do go about planing out your PLA comic? Like how do you actually turn your ideas/ storyline into comic form? Is it chapter to chapter or do you have the whole idea already planned out? Trying to find my own way in comic making so I’m just wondering if you could give any advice. Feel free to ignore if you don’t feel comfortable answering
So, at first this was al i could think to send.
because its incredibly accurate to my process.
Jokes aside, a lot of how i work is back and forth chaos, fighting with ideas until im happy with them. I will start with a list (usually not written down because im unhinged and keep a ot of it in my brain) and organise it in a way that makes sense to the situation, in this case workign with a game with an established plot...not that its a very strong one.
with a set of ideas, and a game to work around i will ramble and rant to a few choice people who i bounce well off, and also stare into space for hours on end building the ideas. This process can be days, it can be years. For context, i have some notes from 2019 about things i wanted to include that are still relevant. I have been scheming how to break and rebuild this OC for ages. Theres no correct time frame, so long as you simply do the work.
Once i have a fairly loose plan, i start to solidify the benning and the end. What is required to make a character compelling, what makes them believable, what makes them human in a way that we recognise. this isnt always a positive thing, people like to call characters who do bad things problematic, but its human nature to make mistakes and be damaged or difficult, the process of the story is not always rainbows and sunshine. For me, this hits even harder, as im trying to tell a story from the perspective of someone fundamentally broken, so showing those breaks and cracks has to be done wisely.
This is the point where i make notes about things that need to change from the start to the end. And ill say one thing, this story in particular, I have not solidly planned the middle. I am allowing space for me to come up with new ideas at points. Being locked into a dead set of ideas can be quite limiting, and as creators we consume and process things constantly to generate new stories. Id be a fool to make a plan and stick to it. everything i do is vague guidelines.
However, I know exactly how the story ends in Hisui, and where it goes to from there. And i think me personally knowing the end goal makes it easier to plot steps towards that, and some of those steps are anything but progressive.
If nothing else, the end was the only thing i saw clearly, and it has only become more complex and loaded and emotional as the rest of this has fallen into place. If you can see the goal, you can work out how to get there with time.
Regarding the chapters, i tend to draft plan up like 3-4 of them at a time, and then go in order to sketch out one after the other, so i have plenty of time to change things while i adjust. its constantly a process of seeing what you make, seeing issues, and scrapping whole parts just to redraw something better or new, unique even. I dont think a single page ive posted has resembled the very VERY first draft thumbnail ive made, and thats just how i do. Every panel, how big they are, the angle you hand the viewer, the way you light things, the expressions, this all dictates SO SO much.
Taking time over it is kind of the job, and let me stress, this is normally a job done by a team, especially the highly popular comics. one inks, one colours, one shades, one handles text, one edits, theres so many people behind it, so dont be bothered by the pace at which things are made if youre working alone like i am. One person means longer production times, if you can, spread the workload out, but its not required. Its why i always say it doesnt matter how long it takes to make, so long as youre still making.
I think its also worth noting, comics are consumed quickly, the bakcgournds and small details can be lost in the ace of the storytelling, pick and choosing your battles is wise, save your time on panels where you want the reader to shift along quicker, keep that pace high, and add in more detail and depth to panels you want to champion or get the viewers to hang around on more. its ok to let go of a "perfect" image in favour of getting content out, if youre being driven nuts by it. Again, time be damned, be happy with it. And if you can let go of petty details, id suggest doing it when possible, so long as it doesnt effect the storytelling.
I mean what else can i even say. This work is a passion project, I love it, more than i can even put into words, and i think you kind of have to, to make comics without monetary motivation. sure you can get lucky and find ways to make it big, but for most of us, its the love of the story. So maybe try not to be your biggest hater, its easy to slip into the behaviour, so try be gentle on yourself and the process. I should take that advice myself haha! but i really do mean it. This is HARD work, so be kind to yourself over it.
anyway, with a rough idea, a bunch of sketches, and time, they get inked and fussed over, i make a billion changes to layout and story, and eventually posting can happen but not after fighting with the monster that is creating. Idk what else i can say. This is not work for the feint of heart, but anyone can learn to do it.
Good luck, comic artists can always use it!
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You know what confuses the hell outta me as a Canadian being force fed American politics by proxy of having the internet ?
Is there only ever two candidates?
I could've sworn there was like 4 parties that you could vote for but like for the last eight or something years it's been like Trump or Biden then kamala or Trump or Trump and Obama. Like are there no other people running for office over there? I feel like I'm in the twilight zone, and it's just the same three people on a loop. But you guys do reelection every four years so like...what's even going on over there ????
#i could just look it up#but the point is the rant and the feeling behind it#like whats even the point of the system there if they always seem to be circulating through like the same two or three people#after four years it should be like reality tv or something just a whole new line up and fresh ideas#tired of seeing the same conflict over and over and over#anyways im not even american so its kinda whatever but also#voting in general feels like this all time#i cant even remember a time i heard about people other than doug ford or justin trudeau#I WANT NEW PEOPLE#NEW IDEAS#and more than anything i want politics to stop being like some highschool election based in social visibility and popularity#like not to sound like dork but WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ISSUES#WHAT DO THESE PEOPLE EVEN ACTUALY STAND FOR#ARE THEY JUST SAYING THINGS BACK AND FORTH WITH NO SUBSTANCE#its always like#tHis PErsOn wIlL aLloW pEoPle To TraNsiTion#tHiS PerSon wAnts To TaX tHe RiCh#like ya thats all well and good but WHAT ELSE???#climate crisis price gouging environmental preservation school funding library funding reproductive rights and general physical mental#emotional health aids that are consistent and cant be taken away#i dont just want people that “care” when its convenient or talk a big talk i want people that DO THINGS because they actually give a shit#and stand for something#like honestly even if its something i dont personally stand for or care for at least STAND FOR SOMETHING#but idk.#on real note i know im expecting a lot out of modern politics#politics in general#and people#but like#just wanted to air it out one time
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Okay but you know what could really destroy Snow?
Seeing Lucy Gray slowly starting to fall out of love with him. Lucy Gray knowing him so well she starts to be repulsed by him. The pain and disdain and the masks she has to wear (expecially if they are in the Capitol and she depends on him) in order to survive... With him because she has no other option. Lucy Gray, who put trust above everything, slowly starting to lie to his face, to hyde the fear and the pain behind fake smiles to make him happy with her.
And he will see this. He will see because, as always, as they are connected by the stars, as they are both performers, he can read her as she can read him. He can see her pulling back from their love story.
So. He may think that he want her to be caged, because so he can feel safe. But in reality he can not. In reality, he needs her to choose him. Everyday. They have to be a team. They have to be alone against the world (even if that means they have to perform to find a place in that world). He has to know, to feel sure, to feel warm about the fact that his Lucy Gray wanted him and wanted to be with him in the same way he wanted to be with her.
He has to be sure they truly love each others.
Or he is going to be insane. After all, he already did. One trace of doubt - he lost it. He lost it so bad.
But betrayal in a so giant way is a thing; a thing that set him in a rage, that make him spiraling without control and do despicable things in a matter or seconds.
Slowly see your only love slowly fade away? This is another type of pain who can drive one mad in a more subtle way, because he still had hope he can just fix things and surerly he will do it. Just a little time. Just a little patiente. He will do it. But in reality she fade. More and more far away. And panic arise, day by day.
So yeah, Coriolanus Snow was a boy in love, and as a boy in love (the first time I must add) wanted to cage her loved one, to control her. It's normal to feel this way when you love someone, because you want the other one to love you the same. But it's a passing thought, not a real one, because physical possesion doesn't mean owning someone's feelings, and he knew this. Deep down he knew. And he wants Lucy Gray's love above everything else.
Seeing her simply perform their love story to him will be too much.
#coriolanus snow#lucy gray baird#meta#snowbaird#this is why everytime I read him as a cold and possessive bitch who only wants to own Lucy Gray's “body” I feel so much ooc#this is not him#he will never be satisfied only to close her behind a door and fuck her#you all are overanalyzing one possessive thought one teen have once the first time he fell in love#and foget that everyone at some point thought something like this#expecially as a teen#in a first love situation#if you deny it I know you are lying#no one is so pure not all the love is platonic or an agape love#coriolanus snow meta#I have strog and deep feelings about this#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tbosas#rant#coriolanus snow rant
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someone please free me from the shackles of my ableist job so I can read my books, draw and write my silly little fics in PEACE
#i told my boss about people disrespecting me and calling me ableist slurs and she was straight up like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#i haven't been paid yet (nearly a month now) and they still pressure me into sending my work weeks before the deadline#i can't sleep I can't have fun without thinking about whether i'm falling behind on work or not#i haven't been able to write these past week because of my work#i'm tired all the time. everyone is worried about me#if they gave me a raise maybe i could help my family w/ bills & start my hormonal therapy but they don't even pay me in the right day#i've been waiting almost 10 years to finally start hormonal therapy and at this point i'm just living for my little family and out of spite#cw: rant#vent#they say they are inclusive and love autistic people and then treat me like shit and get pissed off when I make a mistake#and then when a neurotypical person does the SAME mistake they say “oh it's fina haha” and don't yell at them like they do with me#i already quit but I have a few more weeks. I'm scared to be unemployed and embarassed. I want to help my family#but it's hard when it feels like the whole world hates people like me
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darling, have you any kevjeanthea thoughts to spare? i've been going insane since i found out jean was thea's puppy and also their Mailman. i'm in need of your wisdom rn.
<3 (@stabbyfoxandrew)
OF COURSE hello darling aerie i hope you're doing well also you know exactly what you're doing referring to jean as thea's puppy don't you. i think i hauve covid....
as of right now i have two ideas which are not really that distinct but cause me great amusement... first i thought about established pro era kevthea and jean ending up in the same team as them (possibly the olympics?) while being a trainwreck himself and kevthea immediately taking him under their wing :) this is like the standard aftg poly fic scenario and i fall for it all the time because it's so GOOD. i think at first kevin's the one who's kind of laying it heavy on jean because he's worried he might do something stupid but thea is ultimately the one drawing jean by the back of his neck and being like you're acting ridiculous. live with us. and he does... AND THEN OF COURSE the evergreen offer of a threesome, the unbearable tension, the constant mistaking of jean as either kevin's or thea's boyfriend, being so close it gets inappropriate. the perfect culmination i think would be a night where they actually do sleep together and jean wakes up under kevin and thea like what the fuck just happened
AND I DONT THINK THEY EVER TALK ABOUT IT. or like define terms. or even boundaries. but it happens and its there and jean is just casually added to their every activity like hes always been there in the first place :) i think theres something just so fun about a dynamic like that for poly ships sorry sorry sorry. jean thinks he's a single man until it's christmas 2011 and he's having dinner with thea's family
my Other idea was well of course the nest-era moment. i was thinking thea has a the boy is mine moment with jean until she realizes that jean has a crush on her too and she's Very flustered about it because it's definitely not what she expected would happen out of this situation. i don't know if it'd change much about canon but i think itd make the scene where kevin takes thea to see jean in tkm very tense >:3 and you know how she was like should i come back? to kevin i think they could do something similar for jean like. finish usc. get a little better. and then we'll come back for you. and they do :3
#jeanthea the boy is mine interlude do you understand.#also i need u to know kevin is so fucking unaware of all of this#or at least so unaware of jeans feelings#EITHER THAT OR he knows but hes obviously hesitant because its easier to be heterosexual in exy#but i think at some point hes at home drinking water in the dark and thea shows up behind him like an apparition like When are we going to#talk about moreau.#and kevins like hello. never#and shes like tomorrow then.#and hes like no please.#and shes like hes sleeping in our bedroom.#and kevins like ok you got me there.#DENIAL IS A RIVER IN EGYPTTTTT#its good that thea is here because shes not a repressed loser and i think shed be having a lot of fun#she dgaf about kevjeans conflict LOL#i have this visage in my head of her playing around w kevins hair (braids ponytails hair clips etc) while he rants#and shes not really listening but shes certainly hearing moreaus name a lot#OH YOU KNOW. you know. you already know#kevin#jean#thea#kevjeanthea is such an ugly name can someone better than me get a better one#kevin/thea used to be mulday iirc so like um. mulreauday#oh that soudns awful#dayreaul#no thats also bad#kevjeanthea
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it sucks to have to be scared to update the game, no matter the size of the update, because you have no idea if it's going to break your game or not (not to mention going through the process of updating your mods)
#sims rant incoming!#i think a lot of sims fans (regardless of the game(s) they're a fan of) are just tired#tired of updates breaking their sims / their saves / their cc#tired of ea releasing broken buggy messes and having the audacity to make us PAY just for something to not work#tired of simulation lag making the game unbearable (especially for lower end devices)#tired of bugs that cause sims to get stuck on top of furniture / eyebrows/hair colors to change randomly / sim faces getting warped#idk it just sucks so bad to be a sims fan bc the only thing holding this community (and the games themselves) together are the mods#without mods and cc the sims (especially 4) would be unplayable because of how boring it would be#having to have mods to fully disable pack/base game features because they're not even slightly tuned (think fears/dust/etc)#or alternatively having to have mods to add in certain features or make certain features work properly (or better)#tired of bugs NEVER getting fixed and being fully ignored for months or even YEARS#and they don't even tell us they know about it so they can get away with ignoring it for as long as possible#not to mention the fact that TO THIS DAY if you want lgbtq+ rep in your game you have to PAY for it bc none of the lgbtq+ sims are base gam#(unless they changed sexualities of base game townies and idk abt it)#idk overall the sims (specifically 4) feels like a dumpster fire#i personally have no interest in a sims 5 because whats the point#why are so many simmers willing to scoot all the shit thats happened with the sims 4 under the rug under the guise of the sims 5 being good#do we really think the sims 5 will be any better when half the decent features are locked behind packs#certain features people paid for in packs are now base game so what was even the point in paying (like hot tubs)#idk everything about the sims 4 and the way it's continuously handled is so poor that i have no hope for any good quality content#maybe we'll get a decent kit or stuff pack here and there#but if we can't even purchase them without an item FULLY WARPING your sims face (ON RELEASE MIND YOU) what is the goddamn point
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Me vs FF14 part... 2?
It's taken me pretty much three full days of running from cutscene to cutscene. But I've finally reached Heavensward.
And like... on some level? I'm kind of offended?
Like, a part of me genuinely wants to replay the entire game from the start "as something else" (different main-class, different race, different starting-area, whichever), because the dungeon-queuing system is actually really fun when you start to Understand it.
As in, FF14 has somehow made an MMO that has almost eliminated the feeling that it is a level-grind? Partially? It's turned the whole thing into a surprisingly comfortable level of (limited, but genuine) social interaction.
To the point where even someone who isn't obsessively grind-focused like me, can genuinely enjoy themselves. Just queuing up for dungeons, Hunting some bounties, and-...
And then FF14 has so many fucking quests that it literally chokes the life out of the gameplay.
As an example, one of their biggest dungeon-draws (bcs high rewards) is a quest that almost everyone hates playing. Because doing that dungeon means watching literally eighteen minutes of unskippable cutscenes.
And that's with them having reduced the amount of cutscenes in that dungeon, because the players complained so much about them.
Like... I'd be perfectly happy replaying the game from the start with a different character, even knowing that leveling isn't some kind of pain-free thing. But the thought of having to restart the fucking Main-Quest? Of having to spend literal days just running back-and-forth to cutscenes?
I'm currently feeling a bit burned-out as a result of the binge I went on to get here, but I'm pretty damn sure that I wouldn't replay this fucking thing even if you paid me for it.
(And, of course, Heavensward also has a Main-Quest continuation that you have to follow. And now I'm not even allowed to fly everywhere to cut down on the "running back-and-forth"-part of my complaints. Not until they arbitrarily allow me to discover flight for the new areas, by going through even more of the Main-Quest.)
(Not to mention that now I have to go back and do even more Class-quests, with their own cutscenes, in order to unlock a bunch of skills.)
(I'm very fond of the "the church is evil because it doesn't let you fuck dragons"-meme, and I'm very much seeing it. But like... come the fuck on. Why is this MMO a feature-length movie-series? Why can't I just play the game and have fun?)
#and yes. i'm very much aware that ''you can do anything with one character''#bcs everyone gets one (1) race-changing potion. and classes can be switched out super-easily. but that's not the point.#video games#ff14#rants#personal stuff#also like... i'm unemployed and waiting for my classes to begin a few weeks from now. i have INFINITE free-time.#and i still feel like ff14 is actively trying to waste my time by ''telling a story'' that should be in a single-player game.#... actually. that'd explain a lot. did the writers of this game learn to write from single-player games?#is that why there are so many cutscenes and minor characters to constantly juggle? did nobody tell them that they were making an MMO?#(the feeling of going ''all-in'' on the genuineness in the cutscenes even when it's corny as shit? good.)#(being forced to sit through cutscene after cutscene instead of actually playing the game? bad.)#like... even just the dungeon-cutscenes? to some degree it's expected that you SHOULD skip them? bcs you're making others wait?#(and during the Raids. that means outright being left behind. ain't nobody stopping for anyone.)#so you're losing a massive bit of story-telling. bcs it's trying to tell that story in the WORST place.#it's a good story? i guess? but it's so fucking inconvenient to _play the game around_ that it feels more like a chore than an adventure.#and in a single-person game? i think it'd be great. maybe not entirely my kettle of fish. but genuinely good. but as an MMO?#like i get that a lot of it has been added onto it over the span of YEARS and that ppl playing it since launch would've been desperate#for new content. despite how the amount of content seems incredibly overwhelming for new players.#but jesus fuck. at least let people wanting to start a new character to just... skip the fucking thing? they've already seen it once.#* nevermind. they thought of that. they're selling ''story-skip''-potions for 10$. wow. just... wow.
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i know aging isn't the end of the world and 24 isn't that old and life isn't a race etc etc etc. however,
#i think a big reason i feel so bad abt being this age is ppl told me this is when things start to get better#and i still feel the same way i did as a teenager so. well. is it really 😐#(being on t probably isn't helping but it's been over 3 years already so... not an excuse i think)#but I'm also physically aging like the reason i barely upload selfies anymore is i see myself getting uglier every day#despite fighting for my life to at least take care of my face and hair...... can't fight the passage of time 😔#+ ofc. my (younger) friends being way more sorted out than i am on every level#again ik life isn't a race but. it can't help but hurt to know I'm still behind literally everyone i know#and my excuses for that aren't even good. bc other disabled ppl my age are also more sorted out than i am#other depressed ppl other borderlines other autistics etc etc. hell these are also my irl friends 😭#and it's dumb. bc feeling like i wasted my life isn't really pushing me to change that now. just makes me want to die even more#(bc i mean what's the point. i will never catch up. I'm still at the starting line AND i move so slow it doesn't even count)#(i don't have a single milestone ppl my age have not even finishing high school which is like. the bare minimum)#(and it sucks bc i also know i have potential i KNOW i can do shit in theory i know I'm smart and got skills. but i can't put it to use)#(and now this is turning into less of a thing abt age and just generally me talking abt how i wasted the last 24 years)#this was more of a stressed rant abt how I'm turning ugly and feeling super old but well. it all boils down to self loathing at the end 👍#vent#negative //#ask to tag#sorry for being so depressing all day oof ik i already said it before but it's been a rough couple of months#(nothing happened my brain just needs to get flushed down the toilet ^_^)#edit: i think. part of my panic about aging. is bc as a kid i was used to being the youngest everywhere#i was the youngest in my class bc i started school a year early. i was the youngest in acting school bc they don't normally accept teenagers#and in addition to that as an adult but before starting t i was always told that i LOOK young too#but now ik i look like I'm in my 20s. and it's killing me that i aged this much in so little#i wonder if shaving my beard will help but i don't wanna get misgendered 😐😐😐 and rn it's the only thing guarding me from that
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Flipping violently back and forth between "Imposter is overrated and gets too much fandom content. I dont want to contribute to that" and "Imposter is such an intriguing and interesting villain I'd love to explore that."
#not art#text post#the thing that gets me is that for all the fancontent he gets like none of it has anything to do with how he ACTUALLY is.#man is a serial identity thief. his second and last appearance is him TORMENTING A MENTALLY ILL MAN TO HIS BREAKING POINT#because idk he fucking felt like it??? bc dan didnt take a dude stealing his identity lying down and actually did shit abt it???#but nooo. 'teehee hes sooo gay coded' 'hes so hot ong' 'heres him in a maid dress'#lets ship him with the afformentioned metally ill man he tormented. that sounds like a reasonable and healthy relationship.#hes a shitty dude who hides his malice behind charisma and charm and yall FELL FOR ITTT#not tagging this with the fandom. dotn feel like it. if you see this and know what im talking abt good for you.#and if you happen to like the character/ship im talking abt. good for you aswell. this post aint for you move along.#rant in tags#vent in tags#character hate#ship hate#might delete this later. who knows haha not me#i pretend to hate him but when i need a villain for a psychological horror/torture scenario? guess who i think of?#dont look at me
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#just coming by to drop that the pjo show annoys me more and more each episode#6 was without a doubt the worst one#I hate how percy is so knowledgeable about greek mythology to a point where watchers not expert on the subject could feel dumbed#by all refs dropped in just a minute#and the way they trest the gods KILL ME#stop making them nice parents doomed by circumstances!!#they're assholes!#they're pricks!#what's even the message behind that ??#if you kids think your parents are distant it's judt in your head they do their best???#shut up#and on the 7th episode#have you ever see more lazy set or costume ?#I am this annoying fan who wants respect put into THAT#and they gave us the plain cliche gray when charon was supposed to be so flamboyant#the balance between tons is so badly handled I hate it#they took away so much of the charm of the original#(at least we have the musical that goes full into it so I guess it balances)#but still a real waste#now that this rant is done I do ADORE what they did with Hades#but once again in relation to the myths#if you know nothing about them the guy is just random#anyway stream the pjo show#don't watch it on disney+#riordanverse#pjo/hoo#show: percy jackson and the olympians#text#oli schist!
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shamelessly vagueing here and this sounds harsh but jesus some people really need to start realising not everything is about them.
not in a stuck up, the world revolves around me, arrogant way. but in a they’re not laughing about you, they’re not gossiping about you, you’re just insecure, reading into every little thing, hurt and need help type of way.
#it annoys me so much and i feel so bad saying it because i used to be one of those people but people really just need to take my word here#and no amount of reassurance will help these people it will only make it worse because they feed off of it and if you don’t reassure them#they’ll think you’ve betrayed them and have been talking about them next#i’ve been one of these people and I KNOW it feels really shitty and it’s really hard to get through but there comes a point where it’s just#straight up self sabotage#its not about other people anymore you’re just doing it to yourself#and it honestly pisses me off because from an outside perspective you’re just bringing everyone else down instead of doing anything about i#i KNOW mental health is more nuanced than that and that sounds so mean but ugjansiwnsjwo it’s just been annoying me#i’ll support you 100% but you cannot be coming to me every single day saying you know blah blah blah hates you when actually they think the#are your friend#so now YOURE the one talking behind peoples backs and hurting people and i CANNOT STAND ITTTTT!!!!!#just ugh#vague posting for the fun of it and it’s 6:00am and need something to distract me from crocheting#and i’m really trying not to be mean by saying all of this#just a post made out of frustration#i want nothing but healing for these people all they’re doing is pushing more people away and i don’t think they realise it and they put th#blame on others instead#because that’s exactly what i did#and looking back i was a really shitty person to these people and am so sorry 😭#long notes rant but please someone tell me they know what i mean by this 😭#irls got me worked up 😭#alèssi says things#pleeeeease someone understand and know i’m not just jumping on depressed people 😭🥲🥲#(editing to add by being really shitty to these people i don’t mean the insecure ones i mean my friends when i was like this)
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i just want a house. that fucking lets me have my dog in it. renting it out to myself and like. two other people. that won't fucking. kick me after a years lease. like. wtf. WTF. can't have shit in this goddamn rental market jesus fucking christ.
#a single goddamn room goes for 300 in this fucking town & they won't let you have dogs either.#like. moved house bc my father needed my room.#ok. fine.#had to leave my dog behind bc new place couldn't let me have him.#yeah. sure. ok.#just feeling salty and sad bc some shit when down with the dog bc of my father and I wasn't there to mitigate it#and now my sister and her husband wont come to my mum's house with their baby bc they don't trust the dog to be kept away#and i feel guilty bc it's my dog and i wasn't there but also pissy because dad fucking fucked up again and it's not my fault#but now my mum's hurt and and i'm like. wtf can I do about this? ya know?#I don't have the job to be able to pay 1000 a week in rent. and the rental situtation is insane. no houses for rent. none. there are 11. 11#in this whole goddamn town! and like! what the fuck am i supposed to do about it?#dog can't be around other dogs. dog is big. fuck fuck fuck#and i can't RANT to anyone about it ahghhhj#I don't know what the FUCK to DO about it#i love my dog and i don't want to give him up. but i'm geniunely afraid that it might get to that point fuck.#i speak!
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It always surprises me how little irl people know about this constant rage of mine
I just shouted back at a rude as fuck customers for being rude to me and all my coworkers, and my coworkers were surprised at me "having some fire inside"
#Like listen#Yes i will be nice and polite#yes i have a good customer voice#and yes most of the time i tend to take and take and take and not get angry#but when after a hard day of cleaning all day long you have some guy laughing behind you and saying fuck off#when he already insulted your other coworkers two days prior#then yeah at some point i will pull the fucking trigger and loose it#especially when i approach nicely and just ask his name with a calm smile#and he immediatly was rude again#oijzgjzeoigjzeoij#sorry feel free to ignore this im just ranting#honestly feels satisfying sometimes to just let loose#especially coz not even 2 days ago i had a Karen scream at me and didn't said shit that time#burito talk
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#no need to read or react just needed to rant about my brain a bit#the next two weeks are supposed to be super exciting with BC giving us a new look and song and music video#it's umk week and my favorite for once has historically great odds of winning and a good chance to do well at eurovision as well#I'm going to see umk live with my dear sister and stay at a hotel so it's like a mini-getout and then I'm going to stockholm and oslo gigs#this is supposed to be best times of the year so far but my brain decided we can't have any of that :)#last year at this same time I got hit hard with depression and the anxiety I've always had got even worse#it got to the point that nothing made me happy or feel anything at all and I just cried all day for weeks#everything about UMK night was blurry and sad because I wasn't talking to my bestie who I've watched eurovision with for 10 years#I just started crying during the Dark Side/ Bad Idea opening and the results felt like nothing#I'll always assiociate Bad Idea with my depression because it was playing on the radio in the nurse's office when I got my meds#anyway I can feel that same darkness crawling back to my brain right now and I'm very scared#my brain decides I don't deserve to be happy and screams about how unloveable and ridiculous and embarrassing and ugly I am#it isn't helping that Joel keeps reposting the most model-looking tiktokers because I always feel a hot gush of shame run through me#and everytime I see a pic of any of their blonde skinny young gfs I just wanna kms#now it's gotten to a point that the voice in my head yells at me that I don't deserve Bc or their music and I should cancel my gig trip#because they wouldn't wanna see a disgusting cow myself being so near the stage not to mention ask for a pic or autograph#and I should just hide in my apartment forever#and everyone who has ever been nice to me is either doing that out of pity or making fun of me behind my back#I can't take this anymore#delete later
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The Life Gems in DS2 are a damning mark against the game that genuinely further exemplifies why people have issues with the entire game.
To start, it's a crutch for game design. DS1 was designed, with levels that had intention behind beating them with 5-20 flasks of varying heal amounts. But because of this, it meant areas were more "chunky" than hallway-like. Segmented into almost mini-games if you will.
If it didn't separate "chunks" with a bonfire, it separated in unlocking a shortcut, elevator or ladder, a key or character. It meant even in death you took something with you. It wouldn't be a waste of time, you made progress of some form outside of just your character or equipment.
Life Gems cost souls, cost time to grind and find. Because of this, using one means Wasting Souls, and time, however it's used to progress forward. Dying...even if you retrieve your souls, means Wasted Time and Souls, which are also, Time. There's seldom few shortcuts due to the "Hallway" design they took for DS2 onwards. Shortcuts are Bonfires far more often than anything unique, and whatever items you find are very likely worthless since the worthwhile stuff is never within reach of general progress, but almost random "exploration".
Yes, the interconnected design of DS1 was a nightmare to create, but it's not like it's impossible to keep in some fashion, that's actually fun, mind you. Having "Chunks" is far superior to these fat hallways they keep making, with ER being the biggest hallway I've yet seen for any openworld. Wouldn't it have been cool to unlock shortcuts back to areas of the openworld? Instead of like, getting a horse and using tornadoes, or fast traveling...
What "Hallway" level design means, is "linear" as in only Point A and Point B with everything inbetween being spaghetti in a circle formed by A/B, pretending to be Point C/D/E, but make no mistake it's just a hallway that has no real exploration, just poor navigation pretending to evoke exploration via removing direction entirely.
Best way to describe it, is imagine A at the top, and B at the bottom, there's 3 paths, 2 of them dead end, and all 3 lines look like spaghetti. There's little design other than making the world look pretty and 'natural' but there's no direction for the player, think "yellow paint" but competent and respectable. So you're stuck aimlessly wandering a swamp that somehow feels like 8 swamps in one hoping desperately trying to find Point B getting stuck in Point J and N.
Because of this, it means you can basically be at any level with any gear, so fuck it, all the enemies have unreadable attack patterns, hop around at mach 50 multiple times, and are spammed every which possible way. The idea being that, you, have to find a way to avoid activating more than you can handle, over, and over, and ov-
Because of this, they rely on the crutch of "infinite heals" because god knows they know they couldn't design around something as simple as "they have either 5 heals or 20." There's no limitation so they don't have to care about level design, who cares! They can spend hours in the wrong area because they don't even need a Point B anymore!
Which again, is another problem, they treat Point B as THE reward, like it's not just a cool thing to find that helps you, it's THE reward, it's your fast travel, it's your means of navigation and direction, getting souls from a boss is frivolous without the bonfire, same with clearing an area, so keep that shit as obscured away from the player as humanly possible, so they're more likely to lose it all, until the end of a boss fight. Blegh, it's just hard for the sake of being hard, the challenge should be the obstacles, not the fact I'll be wasting time if I make one mistake I couldn't possibly have not made without trial and error.
Which there's a balance for everything I've said here to be complete clear, and to me, DS2 heavily lacks balance, because it's not designed around "Here's the challenge and you can do stuff to make it easier" it's almost always "Die to Learn and most times that's not enough so Heal Heal Heal baby good luck making progress!"
So, here's the deal, the simplification, When You are Considering something, your first thought is likely Resources. In the case of DS1, you know you have limited resources, so you Design Around That, there's an intention behind the obstacles that are intended to be overcome with that set amount of resources. Bonfires aren't The Reward, they're a signifier that you Made Progress.
DS2 doesn't consider that at all. It considers the Fight, or the Gank, and again, over and over, it's just about avoiding a gank, sure DS1 has this but it's like, harder to set up accidentally, for sure there's moments, but DS2 is nothing BUT that. Because of this, it doesn't feel like you're fighting, but playing a poor Dynasty Warriors. Since they basically can only design around Infinite Healing they have to make it so you never have time to heal, not because the AI is smart, but because the AI is bountiful and surrounding. You can't design around 6 enemies all clustering around the player and swinging in a Souls-Like that's Absurd, it's poor for that reason and constantly trying to avoid it is simply put, not fun, it's a one trick pony they rely on constantly. Bonfires are The Reward, they enable your means to fast travel Past the obstacles you just struggled horrifically through, it's a pat on the back after almost dying in a car crash. This means you're never rewarded until you No Longer have the chance to Waste Your Time in the exact same area, but a new area with the exact same problems.
To be clear I fuckin' love the artistry of DS2 and the lore, the characters, the theories, fan-art, but DS2's failures come in with Level Design more than anything else, and that Level Design is what lead to Life Gems. Your average player is not going to be able to Flask Only DS2, but you can in DS1, that's nothing to say, other than DS1 has far more intention behind it's entire design than DS2 does.
If DS2 had better level design I straight up think it would've been better than DS1 in far more areas but because of it's dreadful pacing and Hallway design, it's sheer obscurity of complex mechanics that in no way translated from DS1 nor transitioned into DS3, it remains as a unique experience that's incredibly difficult to enjoy. I really think it's like Chulip, it's not a game people recommend playing, but do recommend watching.
#Dark Souls 2#a ramble#not a rant to be clear#I'm trying to beat this fucking game for the first time#it was my first souls like and really did make me write off the series back then#But every time I see someone sing praises and show off elements of the game#I desperately ache to play it and enjoy it#but truth be told I really cannot get behind it's jank as hell feeling in everything#like the Heide Knight or whoever has a Frame 1 Attack input. The fuck? Like cmon dude who “designed” that?#Then he just kinda...Freezes and suddenly does a big attack and instant turning. Like bro what kind've telegraphing is making the animation#look like it's breaking? I honestly thought his code was broken til he just changed animations into an attack#also the fact my cool dual wielding Big Sword and Normal Sword is worse than the unmodified Beserker Sword...#It's just depressing. Like there's no point in experimenting because the fuck-off sword everyone uses really is just better to use#it breaks poise it does lotsa damage has a long reach#so frustrating because power stancing is cool but like why bother#and weapons break in 3 minutes it's so frustrating#and hitboxes are just fucking BAD dude there's no excuse#the examples some give to try and prove otherwise are anecdotal compared to the reality#also why the FUCK is there SO MUCH FREEZE after a swing oh my god. Just lemme dodge roll already shit#There's nothing less fun than getting 1 hit in and having to wait for their 6 swings and you do next to no damage#and you're constantly being pushed into yet another gank#There's alot of people who are very wrong about DS2 being a bad game. But that doesn't mean it's genuinely not well made#There's people who just like...for some reason run away from enemies instead of fighting setting themselves up for failure?#they're wrong. But other times people show off enemy AI that straight up has never happened to me before#and claim this is how people should've played. So I do it and...No that doesn't work actually#Just frustrating how it seems nobody has a clue about anything in this game from fan to hater. But the fans are cooler#People really should take the time to make a decent guide for it. It's designed to have someone holding your hand honestly#Not playing for you but navigating you.#Hell a Map would've made a world of difference#oh and
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