#but thats it we cant have the same kind of character twice right?

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 741: Danchiku's “shout”

Pag 1

1: In their eyes,an unshakable will....!!

Pag 2

3: Ahhhh

4: Danchiku is exhaling!! For so long!!

3.... 4....

5: 5 seconds!!

Ahh

6: No, he's exhaling even more!!

8... 9.... 10 seconds!!

Ahhhhh

Pag 3

1: 11 seconds.... 12 seconds!!

3: He's emptying his lungs using all his muscles around them!!

5: This is bad!!

Pag 4

1: It's coming!!

2: “Panda shout”

“It's a breathing technique”

“I become twice as fast”

The onw who reaches the sensor line first wins this race!!

If I don't get ahead now

3: He'll catch up!!

4: Ahhh

Pag 5

5: Filled up of “fresh”!!

6: Panda....

Pag 6

1: Shout!!

Hiigaruaaagh!!

Pag 7

1: Hiigaruaaagh!!

Pag 8

1: He caught up to me!!

2: Twice as fast!!

3: Kuaaaaagh

Pag 9

1: We entered the last curve!!

And Danchiku is still accelerating!!

2: This is Danchiku at “100%”!!

Pag 10

1: Cough cough

This is so hard!!

2: 300km left until the sensor line!!

3: Catch up, catch up, catch up

Catch up!!

Pag 11

1: Sugimoto Terufumi!!

2: Kuaaaaaa

200m left!!

Pag 12

1: Cough

Cough

2: We're all both human beings

We all have limbs, and a head

Danchiku, and Onoda, and Naruko too

3: We're all human beings!!

4: Our bikes aren't all that different

My Colnago is ligh and fast!!

5: So, I'll catch up

I'll catch up!!

6: I should catch up!!

Pag 13

1: I watched it, their running

3: I watched them from the sidelines

For three years!!

4: Onoda!!

Onoda-kun!!

Sakamichi!

Pedaaal!!

5: Doesn't matter how hard it was for them

Pag 14

1: They never gave up!!

3: Calm down, heart

Calm down, breath

4: Panda shout? Bamboo Hop Shot?

5: You're working hard,didn't you, Danchiku?

That's nice

6: Then I'll indulge you and let you practice with me!!

Kuaaaaaa

Pag 15

2: They left Onoda and the others behind.. so the race is on this lap!!

Nii-chan!! On!!

They're coming!!

3: Danchiku and Sugimoto

4: 100m left!! This will settle it!!

They both started the final sprint!!

Danchiku is ahead!! And he's smiling!!

Pag 16

1: Sorry, Sugimoto-san

As expected, you ran and practiced in Sohoku with no breaks for three years

2: But

It's over now!!

3: I'm sorry, but give up please!!

4: Sugimoto!!

5: Nii-chan!!

Pag 19

2: Kuaaaaaagh

4: Ju... just now....

Pag 20

1: They arrived at the same time.... on

2: At the end.... Sugimoto stretched ahead with a long sprint...

Who knew he could do something like that!!

3: Nii-chan really is amazing, on!!

4: But

A tie at this moment means that-

On

5: This race

Pag 21

1: Hasn't ended yet!!

It's a suddent death match until they settle this!!

2: A long.... sprint...

You still had.... something like that....

4: Good job.... my Colnago-chan, good job

5: No... now....!!

Should we go another lap, Danchiku?!

6: This guy.... he doesn't give up!!

[wolvertooth]

can you plz hate rant about the deadpool & wolverine movie… saw it last week and i didn’t like it all… very refreshing to see that someone shares my opinion lmao

i got u man👍 most of this was in my drafts from after the movie came out, but i just never got around to posting it. i added some other opinions ive had since then, tho theres still a lot ive said over the past month that ive totally forgotten about lol

the intro sequence was fucking HYPE‼️ but then, part way thru the movie, u realize....it doesnt ever hit that same mark again. WHERE TF WAS THE HUGH JACKMAN SONG THEY PROMISED? the trailers showed 95% xmen origins clips. the movie didnt mention it once. no the brothers line doesnt count. false fucking advertising. deadpools sexuality has been confirmed since 2014. and now, 10 years later, its still being reduced to gay jokes. and people still eat it up like its genuine rep.

that guy at the tva who’s whole punchline was that he likes men. why. in 2024. why is that allowed. his whole character was a gay joke. i mean so was deadpool, but this guys whole thing was. That. can i say homophobia? can i say i felt that? is that reasonable? this movie felt like a fundraiser for the future avengers movies to make up for all the recent flops.

i watched this shit twice and yea. i was right. the plot was half assed. once u watch it once, thats it. thats the fun. its all just cameos. the jokes didnt even make me laugh again, since it was majority shock based humor. my second watch thru i was trying not to fall asleep in my chair. the way it lacks plot isnt in the Not Coherent kind of way, but rather 'this couldve been a 40 minute monster of the week episode'....or maybe even a 2 episodes if they wanted to get freaky with it it just felt so separate from the rest of the movies, like it wasnt even a sequel.

literally, the movie begins with them abandoning the previous timeline and wade moving to a new ‘better’ one.....almost like hes moving over to a more sacred timeline.........separate from fox.........which is dumb af cuz the movie couldve been him accepting that whatever happens in ur life u cant go back and change, and u have to make due with the good u already have. the previous movie ended with him having a family, he didnt need a new one. i mean, they did that for logans 'learning moment', why wouldnt that also apply to wade? paradox literally says ‘hey we brought u in cuz the mcu is dying, so u should come over to the sacred timeline’ and then after he changes into his costume THEY CHANGE THE PLOT. THEY THROW THAT OUT. WITHIN MINUTES. now paradox is like ‘actually just your timeline is dying, and i wont elaborate on how that works. and also u dont get to go to the sacred timeline. and i hate you.’ WHY BRING HIM THERE AT ALL THEN IF THATS THE PLOT U CHANGED IT TO? ITS DOESNT MAKE SENSE. even if the plot was that he had to go to the sacred timeline cuz his own was dying, WHY WOULDNT HE BE ABLE TO BRING HIS FRIENDS?

what was the vanessa plot? they never explain why she broke up with him? theres like a tiny flashback where she says hes been distracted ever since he got rejected, rejected from what? clearly not the avengers, since that happens after she leaves him. so wtf was the motive here????? the cameos felt like props. especially the deadpool corps, which i feel like they didnt even skim a wiki article for. they just went off google images. which hurt me. cuz i reallyyyyy like those guys....in the comics, theyre a group of deadpools(consisting of lady deadpool, kidpool, headpool, dogpool, and deadpool), who in their first series save the multiverse from being destroyed(sound familiar?). theyre the GOOD GUYS. why tf would they hear cassandra nova say ‘hey im gonna kill the entire multiverse’ and go ‘alright sure whatever’. why were they in the void to begin with? how’d they get there? isnt the void just for movie continuities anyway? why was cassandra also there? how does the void work? why does the void exist? will someone please explain literally anything in this movie? why not have them come in later to save the fucking day instead??

oh lady deadpool...how they massacred ur character... OH KIDPOOL.....HOW THEY MASSACRED UR CHARACTER...... god speaking of that. cassandra nova had literally so much potential and they watered her down to just Evil Villain. she hasnt done much in the comics, but one the things she did in one them was using her powers for therapy on the xmen(which deadpool also made a cameo in). she sort of does this briefly in that one scene, but it was just so.....basic. bland. why was there no b plot with the rest of the main cast. did they think the audience doesnt watch these movies for them? cuz i sure fucking do. i was waiting for the continuation of colossus and wades epic romance arc. side note, the gay jokes in the previous movies felt even less queerbaity then these ones. this movies queerbaiting was just....sad. marketing queerbaiting. this movie WISHES it couldve been deadpool 2 levels of queerbait(shoutout to the extended sex mimicking scene set to In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel)

did anyone catch at the end when deadpool was narrating and when he said ‘friends’ yukio and negasonic teenage warhead were on screen. did anyone see that. they disney gal paled them.

i know wade is supposed to be the Funny Guy but man. thats literally all he was this movie. the other ones has ANGST they had him be HUMAN while this one was like 'logan was mean to me one time ):' bro. what happened. where'd the writers go.

this wolverine was like. the wolverine 2014 wolverine. which is when fox wolverine started to lose character and just become grumpy and mean. hes also like that in Logan 2017, but the reason why this kinda attitude works in that one is bcuz hes old, hes fucked up, hes tired, and every fuck that comes outta his mouth he means it. and yet....still manages to experience other emotions. what a concept. ive read literal satire comics that understood his character more(shoutout to the What The--?! series). it just had me waiting for the 'gotcha! this wolverine is actually 3 dimensional!' but it never fucking got there. it was amusing in the beginning, but by like half way in, i did not give a single fuck about this guy. they tried to give him some emotional moment(like. the only emotional moment in the entire film) but it just...lacked the emotion. just 'heres my sad backstory. are u sad now?' and then they did the SAME THING AGAIN no we get it man u were at the bar instead of with ur friends and u went on a classic wolverine style berserker rage. why should we care tho?

i mean, sure, they could use the excuse of being in the type of depressive state where ur emotions numb out(speaking as a mfer with the came curse), and yea hes not the kinda guy to open up about his emotions unless he really trusts someone(which he would likely distance himself from forming connections with others after that kind of trauma), but with cassandra nova right there there was a missed opportunity for elaborating on that. for digging deep into his brain and telling why this fucked him up so bad. imo, if i were to write it, with everyone he gets close to he puts upon the expectation for himself that hes at fault for anything that happens to them. that he needs to be the savior, even in a friendship. to prove himself to be worth something. especially after a life of being convinced hes a burden by just existing as himself, he needs to have use in order to make up for the fact that hes Logan.

but whos going to save him? isnt he struggling too? whos gonna help you? looking at all the other logans across the multiverse, who is the wolverine? why do you keep falling for the same patterns no matter where you are and who you are? deadpool called sabretooth queen and she/her'd logan within like 5 seconds of eachother. that was pretty good ig

final verdict:

yknow. i think i get now the way fans reacted the way they did tho.

the other night i was rewatching the movie Hackers with my mom, saying that it was obvious the creators mustve known a lot about hacking in order to do such a good parody of it, out of love for the craft….but my knowledge of hacking is pretty minimal, so i have no actual fucking clue if that assumption is accurate or not. im just going off of a ton of references to hacking. for all i know, real hackers couldve hated this movie.

and thats how the average non comic fan saw this movie. they saw a buncha characters and references and thought ‘damn, they must really love the source material’ without knowing how much of a kick in the face it felt like to watch them get used and butchered like that.

[seeminglydark]

Forgive me if this is weird to say, but as someone who really struggles to get attached to his own ocs out if fear of seeming cringe (and trying really hard to break out of thar) I really admire how much you unabashedly love your characters and how much it shows in your art

hahaha its not weird to say at all, I actually also struggle with this. I get a lot of self embarrassment and feel cringe about the fact that i draw the same things all the time, i dunno if that helps to hear. Sometimes I even refrain from posting things for a few days, or i wont post them in places like patreon or my patreon server or something cuz i have this fear of 'Oh Not Again.'

I think what helps me is remembering that first and foremost, I created my ocs for ME. I draw them for me. everything I do, its for me, coping mechanisms, self therapy, working through issues, or just for fun and aesthetic. They are extensions of me, and loving them is basically learning to love me. I put the care i should have been giving myself all this time into them, and it weirdly helps with my own self love journey, cuz honestly I feel pretty cringe most of the time and like i dont belong in most spaces. My ocs ease that, its a way of putting my heart and thoughts on paper so to speak.

These days i tell myself if people get bored, or dont want to see characters, or think im cringey, they have the freedom to unfollow. The internet is a vast place. When people are jerks about it, which I'll be honest, has happened WAY less than my brain tells me it will, i ignore and move on. No one has to be here. Has it happened? Yeah once or twice maybe, but compared to the positive messages I get its really rare. it's more that i think the rejection hurts us more when we hear it, I combat this by keeping a document where I've copy pasted all the comments/tags/dms that made me feel good, that way i can read through it and remind myself most people that are here love what i do. i like to think thats why people followed me.

And you know what, its so hard to separate ourselves from what people think of us, so remember the good things, cuz its incredibly rewarding that theres people who DO wanna be here. That love them maybe just as much as me. That feeling is WAY Bigger than the cringe feeling. The fact that i CAN be obsessive and cringe and people are on this ride with me? Holy Shit like I cant even describe how good that feels.

Create first and foremost for you. Thats the win, right there. And if it so happens others want to walk that road with you, well you've already won by creating so thats just a really cool bonus. Remember the kind interactions you have with people.They mean so much more than the negative ones. Love your ocs cuz they are a part of you in some kinda way and you deserve that love and care too.

-RJ

[chiimeramanticore]

any thoughts/headcanons/ideas/takes you feel compelled to share on a whim? about anything in particular?

this is an older ask thats been sitting in my inbox but i wanna use it as my opportunity to talk about benny while im still fnvposting bc BOY do i have thoughts about benny and BOY do i have a story for you guys

so as i briefly mentioned before, i had decided to do the yes man route before i even played the game bc i just wanted to play for him at first lol. i didnt know how closely tied yes man was to benny before meeting him- my main 2 goals were "get that bastard who shot me" and "find my robot boyfriend" lmao

when i got to the strip and confronted benny, he convinced me to go up to the presidential suite and told me he'd meet me there- ofc this was a trap, but with a good speech check (like i said, a good speech check makes for some of my favorite moments in the game) i managed to convince him to let me go . i dont even remember what i said (i think it was something like "if you let me go i won't follow you") but i remember he was like ".....i cant believe im actually letting you live" and in that moment i was like Ohh im in this fuckers head now

since then ive been imagining this semi-homoerotic rivalry between us, a la tom and jerry or cooper and propeller knight lmao. he skipped town immediately made a run for the fort (obviously. him letting me live didnt mean he was done trying to take over vegas) and i ran after him bc. well i needed that chip too lmao . when i got to the fort i found him captured by the legion, and i finally had the opportunity to talk to him at length.

after learning his backstory and motivations, i realized, i dont actually hate benny nearly as much as i thought i did? like he's an asshole for sure, and he will always be the guy who shot me in the head lol but like, he wasnt like... evil yknow. i realized i saw a lot of myself in him- he's just one guy who took a look at the world and realized he didnt like any of it, and wanted to change it... but he's also only one guy. it felt like we started out in the same position, and he lost his way at some point. he kinda epitomized my own (in-character) fear that whatever i did with new vegas after taking over wouldn't be the right decisions to make. and god i felt bad for him

so i tried to let him go. twice lol . i went out of my way to find a stealth boy for him like he asked, but he was a stupid asshole and activated it immediately when i gave it to him and then we both died dfkghk so i did the bunker mission and went back to caesar and he was like "ok you can choose how benny dies" and i asked if he could be let go and he was like "haha youre funny. choose something or we're crucifying him" and i was like Okay Okay Sorry

if im being completely honest i felt bad for benny like this. i'd usurped his plans embarrassingly easily, and now he's tied up and on death row because of it. we'd had our exchanges in who had the upper hand, but i didnt wanna just kill him like this, it didn't feel fair. so i told him to fight me in the arena, and he was like. amused by the idea? and we got our stupid machetes from the legion and fought and it was clumsy and messy bc im not good with melee and he's just an npc but there was something kinda perfect and human about it

and then i got the final blow on him. and my game froze. it froze so bad i had to force shut down my pc . the next day i turned it on and guess whose copy of fnv was completely busted! like loading any save or starting a new game would immediately crash the game kind of busted. and then i went to open yes man and SOMEHOW his data was entirely wiped . and i was CRUSHED because that's!!! that's the reason i started playing fnv to begin with!! i put a month of play time into him!! i'd maxed out my relationship with him!! i didnt know if i could even get that progress back!! but i had to go to work and i couldnt stick around to find out!

so i spent ALL day on friday anxious and sad and worried i wouldnt be able to fix things. it took me all weekend but i did eventually get everything fixed (extra special thank u to yes man's dev for helping me w him). but i swear to god i was convinced this was all somehow benny's doing. the game had frozen on a frame of benny mid-machete chest stab, and it was the last thing i saw before all of this happened. after our extended cat and mouse game, after all this back and forth, it felt like he was fucking me over one last time from beyond the grave and beyond even the limitations of the game. i took his life, he took my yes man. like seriously yes man was literally the only other program that was affected by the crash, it FELT targeted lmao

when i got the game working again, i had to replay the sequence where i killed benny and it didnt crash when i killed him this time. actually seeing him fall to the ground dead was oddly both cathartic and painful. i took his belongings (which felt kinda disrespectful but im sure he'd have wanted me to lol) and i left the fort wearing his suit. i gave yes man his gun (maria, which i love that he named, the loser)

i dont think benny was Right (though i dont think anyone in this game is meant to be entirely Right lol) but i also think he had the right idea going in. he's equal parts inspiring and a cautionary tale and i hate him just as much as i love him. he might be my favorite character in this game. i'll miss you, you asshole

[bigmack2go]

Watching german newsies. Am disturbed. Need sleep now.

Update

Jack „duzt“ (the not formal you) kloppman and i love it

So they have absolutely no singing skills which is weird considering its a musical

YK THE PART IN CARRIING THE BANNER WHERE THEYRE ALL SINGING ABOVE EACH OTHER??? HALF OF THOSE ARE ENGLISH???

Not abt the german sync but i love boots so much ydek i love him almost as much as albert

They also call themselves newsboys in the german version like BRO WHAT ARE YOU CHANGING THE NAME FOR IF YOURE NOT TRANSLATING IT ANYWAY

PLSSSS „hast du keine aguen im kopf“😭

They did make it a whole lot clearer what jack meant when he talked about oscar with his shoes on

And you can understand what they say in the backround soooo much better

Mush’s voice actually fits better than his real one

Snaps is so funny😭😭

Omg boots singing in german is smt I didn’t know i needet (because i dont. Its terrible)

Blink cant pronounce Harlem „helm“💀💀💀 you go boy! Don’t let anyone tell you not to where that helmet!

WE LOVE U DENTON UR AN ICON *fucking fangirls*

„Spot kanlen“

They made „i spent a month there one night“ into „a night there always feels like a whole month“ :(

Wheres the fun in that???

What the hell is a spot kanlen

I take the thing with races sync back. In fact i think its really really good. And so is blinks (especially blinks) and skitterys.

STOP SAYING KANLEN WHAT TH HELL

I already didn’t understand why they would make a song called seize the day when it could be carpe diem but i guess in English it makes sense cause you can say both versions. In german u cant. No one ever said „nutz den tag“ if anything they say „nutze“ but like just say carpe diem christ. Maybe u can actually find some fitting rhymes then that aren’t just the same thing twice.

THE NEWSIES BACK UP A GAY KID IN THE GERMAN VERSION!!! I REPEAT!!! THEY CANONICALLY BACK UP A KID THAT GOT CALLED A schwuchtel (which is the german equivalent to f4got) THIS IS NOT A DRILL GUYS

„das hinkebein? Ich hohl ihn“ why was that actually kinda cute????

„IcH wIlL NiChT dAS JeManD MicH tRäGt“

Istg crutchie is such a slow talker in german i cant even

RACHE FÜR CRUTCHIE

AINT NO WAY THEY QUOTED STARWARS😭😭😭

„Brooklyn hält euch die Stange“

Thats what he said—

(Im so invalid for this😭)

Ok just lemme get this straight cuz im not sure im correct. The newsies on the pic are the characters that actually got named right??

I have so many feelings about german kony and only very few of them are good

But snipeshooter still kind sounds like himself in it so i guess that good

WHY R THERE NO GERMAN SUBTITLES THO????

Ok but „harlem bis nach sonst wo“ was actually handled pretty well

I only just realized mush swalloing a laugh when davey doesn’t wanna spit shake

Why do they juat completely change some things they say?? Like they could have easily translated it??

Why is the refuge and orphanage in german

IS LES SMOKING???

Edit: nvm its just a lollipop

Istg Esther is so done

GEWERKSCHAFT

(I didn’t even know that was a word)

Still can’t believe blush is cannon

Ok but in santa fee jack talks to a crowd, to himself and to someone else entirely all at the same time

The way jack say snoddy is simply just wrong

Skittery is weird too

„Spot conlen macht uns n bisschen nervös“ nawwwwww fucking cute ass

Omg the men in the backround talking????? Awesome!! Can hear every word!! „Die werden sich noch umsehn“ yass

Why tf they calling him captain instead of kelly

„ICh FrEsS n BeSeN“

Ast-rein

Boots is so poursouled

Edit: i take it back

Reminder to anyone hc‘ing mouth as daveys nickname that in german his nickname would be SpRacHrOhR

WHY DO THEY TAKE DIFFERENT ENGLISH WORDS??? Either u translate it or you leave it. But if you’re changing it but not translating wheres the point??

WAS WILLST DU DAMIT SAGEN? HAT SPOT ALSO RECHT??

Nothing. And i mean nothing. Makes sense in seize the day. And it doesn’t rhyme.

WiR GEBEN IHNEN SAURES

Fucking blink

Edit: rn -mush

Why is crutchie so dumb?

I just realized some of the scabs were already convinced before the fight w the Delancys

What is the woody gate??

Boots is a fucking icon

Spot just livked his palm instead if soitting in it??

NO O E FUCKING TALKS LIKE THAT

What denton says doesn’t make any fucking sense istg

Some of the rhymes in kony are actually okay

THEY REMOVED SPOTS VIBRATO

cant fucking understand a word snipeshooter says

„gut so“ KLOPPMAN LOML

Why did snider donate to the strike??

Herrliche aussicht STFU ALREADY

Who casted Sarah‘s sync???

Motherfucking Pulitzer is licking the paper

Motherfuxker is one of them the guy frim umsere kleine farm

„Brooocklin“

Wtf they didn’t even try to make emphasis‘s similar

They removed meddas accent:(

Just realized the bodyguard spot turns into when snider shows up

Also one lf the guys looks exactly like live‘sies spot

Blink being a bodyguard is the reason i‘m alive

Istg what did spot expect dumbass

HOW DID DAVEY HET AWAY BUT NO ONE ELSE

Not them changing the order 💀

I love that the newsies have priority

1 children

2 women

3 jack

4 themselves

5 davey

6 their friends

7 other newsies

8 other people

I motherfucking love 92‘sies henry

Why is the mayor plying bodyguard now

Pulitzer poking jack is even better in german

Seiz is talking such bullshit tho??? Doesn’t even make sense. Je litteraly does have somewhere to go

what DID crutchie do to the sauerkraut??

Santafee be like📈📉📈📉📈📉📈📉

ScHoN gUt BiN nIcH tAuB

JA MERKT MAN BRUDER DU HAST IHN GRAD NE HALBE EWIGKEIT IGNORIERT NATÜRLICH SCHREIT er

„Wie ein pinkel“????? Huh??

Boots is so dedicated about the clothes what the hell??

Why does davey say i dont even know your real name instead he of you didn’t even tell me your real name.cause lts not true?? And He could have said that?

Why did i think they replaced weasel at the end??? They didn’t. They have two at the beginning too

sarah decking morris is my motto of life

Les 🥺🥺🥺

MorriS‘s german laugh is my life istg thats so funny

Und das ist für crutchie

YOU TELL EM LES

vorallam nicht klug? Yop. Absolutly. Positive. Correct.

Wait theres a picture of the irl Katherine in pulitzers office

How did they get the word „kriegsberichterstatter“ in the word „warreporter“ but not „kenne“ in „tell me“

WHY R WE TALKING ABOUT BAGUETTE NOW????

Why does denton say pulitzer so weird “pOUUUlitser”

[liquidstar]

absolutely no one asked but im thinking about the “i love emilia” scene and how misunderstood it is by nerdboy fans that kind of miss the whole point of the series. subaru’s rejection of rem is narratively a rejection of the typical isekai power fantasy. 

when subaru was first summoned to lugnica, he instantly assumed he was getting his very own isekai power fantasy, he thought he would have the coolest magic powers and his own harem and whatnot. and well, those tropes are still somewhat there, but its a deconstruction so hes not really getting what he wants. not only is his return by death ability a very very isolating one but also a painful and traumatic one, and its not even a flashy cool superpower, its literally one that only works so well because hes weak enough to constantly die.

so by arc 3 subaru feels somewhat robbed. he always had a bit of a tendency to treat the people around him like characters (literally, he calls people NPCs) and he had a tendency to boil them down to tropes and sort of expect that they act a certain way, that things would go a certain way because hes The Protagonist. but things arent going according to his script. the final nail in the coffin is when he gets humbled by julius at the royal selection hearing, julius is literally the “knight of knights”, an ideal subaru will never have.

subaru claims he entered the royal selection hearing and fought julius for emilia, but emilia sees right through this and rightfully calls him out- she tells him he only did it for himself, that he doesnt really know her, that hes constantly projecting his own will onto her. shes right in every sense, subaru has placed her on a pedistal and can no longer treat her like a person, the “special treatment” he talks about isnt something she wants but he doesnt care what she wants. he only cares about what he thinks she wants, whatever works best for his fantasy. he’s literally objectifying her, its not subtle. so she packs her bags and leaves.

so subaru sulks in the capital while rem watches over him. and rem stays with him and supports him and comforts him despite his terrible fucking disposition- arc 3 subaru becomes borderline unlikable at times, especially when he decides that the witch cult attack on roswaal’s manor is a good thing because he can play the part of the hero and save emilia and force her into a princess role once again (remember shes running for KING). but eventually hes faced with the grim reality of the situation, like, its really fucking drilled into his head how messed up this is. 

and he realizes hes not a hero. he breaks down in front of rem and confesses what a pathetic loser he actually is, how stupid and lame hes been, how much he hates himself. and she tells him that she loves him and....

actually, let me go on a tangent here, im going to skip ahead to arc 4 because... arc 4 subaru actually perfectly mirrors arc 3 rem. so forgive this rambling for not being linear. anyway, in arc 4 subaru has overcome his feelings of entitlement, but he loses rem, the person who encouraged him, the person who he still did love very much (maybe not in the same way, but he did love her). and now he hates himself twice as much. he hates himself so much that hes actively suicidal. 

his most obvious parallel for suicidality is beatrice, yes, but the way in which he’s self-sacrificial parallels rem. rem, who literally calls subaru her “reason to die” and throwing herself into danger- thats the same shit subaru does in arc 4 to save everyone. subaru sees no value in his life in arc 4, neither does rem. for some reason people ignore rem’s inferiority complex, her lack of self confidence due to just being ram’s little sister. ram is LITERALLY the reincarnation of a god so we cant blame rem for feeling a bit... sidelined compared to her twin. her love for subaru is selfless, but selfless to a fault.

but subaru is also a fantasy for rem; one of the series biggest themes is “self recognition through the other”- essentially the way people see you vs the way you see yourself, and how in a sense both of those are equally real. rem literally sees subaru as her hero, she sees him the way that he expected himself to be seen when he came into this world, she sees him as the fantasy he wants to live out, and as her own fantasy as well. she literally tells him about the fantasy life she imagined for them in the future and everything. 

subaru initially offered her this fantasy in an attempt to run away from the events at the manor, he told her they could run away together and live out their lives. and rem rejected him, because her love is selfless, because she understands that this fantasy isnt right- she puts that over her desires. and she still confesses her love, to show them that hes worthy of it for who he is too. 

and through this its made even more clear that rem IS the fantasy, the girl that would stick by you no matter what, worship the ground you walk on, see you as a perfect power fantasy hero no matter how plain you are. but shes still a realistic character, she only works as a fantasy if you refuse to see her as one (like subaru used to) and ignore the fact that her love is also flawed, self-destructive, and co-dependent one. meanwhile emilia is the reality, the girl subaru cant force into a box, wont solely depend on him, and wont be projected upon- she demands to be her own person, with every fiber of her being, because we all know how much emilia hates being treated like someone shes not.

so... after some encouragement from rem, subaru chooses not to take the easy (slothful) route. he tells rem straight-out “i love emilia” and this time he means it in a true way.

and a million nerdboys who wanted to fuck rem cried their eyes out that night because they wanted to live the fantasy vicariously through him, missing the entire point of the series. subaru crushed the fantasy by choosing the reality. 

and the character development really reallt stuck- arc 4 subaru and emilia are frankly kind of adorable. not perfect given the horribly traumatic shit going on, but when emilia had her mental breakdown in the trial and started to act incredibly dependent on subaru, he was absolutely horrified to see her so traumatized because he knows she would never want this- he no longer wants her to depend on him especially at the cost of her on sanity. and subaru would later reference rem’s “i love you” speech to him by giving a similar one to emilia, giving her the same encouragement rem gave him. 

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket,Se03, Ep 9 (part 1)

“ppl & feelings can’t be bound down”~

What an ep for my girl tohru! She completed her growth thanks to kyo’s rejection. really, It was so hard, cruel, understandable but above all so necessary for her to reach a logical realistic conclusion that “I can love/want things from the bottom of my heart, but at the end I can’t force or bound them to me, I won’t regret loving/wanting them, but I’ll move forward regardless, no more standing still”.

-The fear of being alone:

Aren’t we all? We’re scared to face the word after breaking bonds, changing, not getting what we want, having to start over. Such feelings run deeper into us all. Both tohru & akito were scared to face the word without the old comfortable bond that they got used to:

Tohru realized today, that she cant keep talking to a cold photo, can’t live according to her mom’s expectations, to fulfill her mom’s wishes, can’t narrate her daily life to her mom & fill her life with other ppl’s own issues to distract her self from facing her own loneliness & from looking deeper into what should she do with her life. As she fell in love with kyo, tohru started talking to him! forgetting to inform her mom abt her life’s details, thinking abt what will she do “after graduation?”. As kyo asked in se02, ep2. Graduating highschool is ur mom’s wish, What would u wanna do after?” Tohru didnt have a response of “an after”cuz her mom wasnt there to tell her! Tohru has to choose “the after” herself!!!! “The after” was being with kyo & starting life together! figuring what to do next together! She no longer alone! she found her most precious person!

Except: he cant be with her. Again tohru is scared. What to do now! she wanted a bond but is forced to leave it. Loving kyo was stage 1 to be free from her grief. Moving forward without kyo is stage 2 to learn not to repeat the painful journey again! She didnt let go of her mom & kyo easily. It was hard, scary but she must do it. You must respect their wishes & move on. As scared as she is, there will be sadness & happiness ahead.

Akito realized she cant keep an empty box, cant keep fulfilling her dad’s wishes to “be loved & special” cant bound the zodiacs to her for good. They may love her or not, it doesn't matter, if they wish to leave for whatever reason, she cant force them to stay.

Except now that the zodiacs are leaving, what does she have to live for? who will be with her? she isnt good with strangers? she never met anyone who wasnt forced to obey her & be grateful for her. Strangers cant be forced to love her! what will she do now? stretch you hand for a greeting. Tohru told her, make a friend, they might refuse you, but hey might accept u too, I’ll make it easy, Hi, I;m tohru, whats ur name?

The power of true love: ( reality vs fiction)

In fairy tales, the princess fix the prince. the prince save the princess. The prince kiss the princess, she wakes up & they be happy ever after. Except real life has no prince & princess, You cant always be saved, you cant always save others, pure intense true love cant always be the answer!

Yuki was first when tohru needed physical saving. he saved her twice! Yuki’s nickname in school ”the prince”. Yuki is always cool, thoughtful & kind. Yuki always knew what to say & do! he deserves tohru’s romantic love more than kyo, right? But “ppl & feelings can’t be bound down”~ . Yuki didn't feel this way towards tohru, granted no one (excepts kakeru) knows the reason why he loves her fondly (she’s his mom figure). The official” prince isnt the one for her. Real life isn’t a fairy tale. Yuki has someone who sees he isn’t cool, perfect or a prince “ granted no one knows abt machi, yet! ) XD

In tohru monologue: she didnt think abt saving, that's not why she loves kyo. She stated normal, silly, mundane things! a shy smile, awkward kindness & the likes. Stuff ppl love abt each other in real life. You dont say, I love my husband cuz he saved me from a burning building in the 7th floor! lol. But fiction is so full of this. Princes saving princesses.

Tohru didnt fix kyo, too! as much as her love helped him greatly to find hope, the best writing choice is that tohru’s love also brought despair to kyo! To him, she’s the symbol of hope, peace & comfort! she’s also, the symbol of despair, torment & unease! EPIC! The kyo who’s stuck in the past cant be with her, the kyo who will move beyond trauma, abuse & broken soul will be with her. The duality is all on kyo’s shoulder: what will he choose? Can he choose in his state now?

In fairy tales the princess wakes up after the kiss. In real life, we don't. Tohru didn’t. Regardless if she fainted during or after the kiss. The kiss fixed nothing. Kyo’s despair in seeing near-dead tohru in a not-so-subtle mimic to his nightmare, has manifested itself into the sweetest kiss upon seeing her conscious & talking. Kyo isnt good with words, his actions are his words. When he’s scared, sad, in trauma: running away. when he’s  fond of her, grateful for her existence: head knock, head pats, hand holding & a kiss. Still the kiss fixed nothing. Kyo is still traumatized more than ever now. Tohru still feels rejected “even if I’m not with you, plz live”.

Talking fixes everything. It didn’t here, kyo & tohru talked & showed their most vulnerable side to the other, but still didn’t meet half ways, regardless of all the love. That’s cuz they keep missing each other’s best timing. Kyo is stuck in the past while tohru has moved forward. even if in her mind she’s the one who stood & he moved. this shows they aren’t on the same wave yet. Before meeting each other again, kyo must learn from his mistake like tohru did. He must face his ultimate demon: his dad. The one who created the current broken kyo.

Rebelling against parents: ( sign of growth & freedom of choice):

Rebelling against parents  is a sign of a desire to choose one’s path, decide one’s own future. Away to express an oppressed desire.

Yuki rebelled against his mom in se02. he told her I’m not going to the college you chose. I’ll chose my path. I’m not staying away from Ayame. My bro is good in my book. I chose who I want to be with. He told her what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.

Tohru rebelled against her mom today. told her I’m not wasting myself doing only what you I think you’ll approve off. You might bot forhet kyo, thats ur choice, But I DO. I love him even if you might not approve of him, Even if he rejected me, my feelings wont change, but I’ll move forward from the grief & pain. mother. She told her what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.

Kyo WILL rebelled against his disgusting dad. He MUST. It is his turn now. He’ll tell him I’m not wasting myself being locked in a cage. I have a future! I’m not a monster. I am LOVED! I might not 100% sure why I’m loved, but the truth cant be hidden. I have ppl who love me! cheer for me! I want to live! enough of death! mom & kyoko died, tohru nearly did, but I’m not gonna die! I’m not killing ME! I’‘ll do what MOM didnt do! I’ll do what YOU couldn't do! I’ll live! He’ll tell him what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.  I cant wait! I’m in tears just thinking abt it! Kyo was punished enough! time for happiness!

Side Notes:

While I’m impressed with tohru’s growth, as they did her justice in this ep, this doesn’t erase that the buildup for tohru’s own journey & trauma was mediocre. There is a reason ppl commented ” omg tohru, you can love your mom AND kyo!. ” Grief is illogical, long process & it sucks that we weren’t allowed to experience tohru’s grief & her mom’s role in tohru’s abandonment issues. Huge lost opportunity that a good conclusion ep cant erase! but like tohru, I’m moving on ~

The path of growth for kyo will start by rejecting the demon: his dad. No. other. option. Hold abusers accountable for their crimes. Stop their madness. Tell them off.

We know kyo is baka! that’s his trade mark, the endearing baka! a lot of characters in the show think so! I love it, but I’m craving baka-yuki! XD! really, yuki is cool, level-headed & smart, but let him be baka too! this only shows up in tiny microscopic doses, but they’re my fave doses of yuki! it humanizes the “perfect prince”, the “gifted high status rat”! Thus him not seeing kyo running the other side, is my fave look on him! XD.

I appreciate that kyo & yuki put their differences aside when they’re with tohru. You cant tell yuki is hella pissed off with kyo, but he restrained himself. His gaze while full of anger is also full of sympathy as he heard/saw kyo’s panic upon the thought of loosing tohru. He understand they both only mean the best for each other, but also tried they both keep missing each other & not meeting half way! Also, yuki being the only one in the hospital is realistic & endearing. No need for them all to be there & yuki lives with her & is so close to her.

kyo not being the hospital is fantastic! thank you writer-San! why would kyo go to the hospital after thinking his nightmare came true? kyoko /his mom warned him, you’ll hurt another person.. he did.. he didn't cause her fall... but caused her sadness & hurt.

Momiji’s reprimanding gaze is my fave look on him! Also, the best response to what akito did. Akito isnt used to such judgemental gaze. Kureno grabbed her cheeks, gently told her you shouldn't do that, the old maid told her you are right, Dr. Hatori erased her mistakes from ppl heads & bodies, shigure being either cold or kissing her ass, coxing her to yet torment another zodiac in his grand scheme to break the curse as happened in the beach arc.

You bet hana & arisa will be there next ep! Arisa will meet kureno & akito for sure. To path the way for their romance as seen in the ED.

Shigure’s “remorse” is a whole can of worms. Playing with ppl’s hearts & feelings to gain someone’s affection is no laughing matter. Each time blood is shed, he contributed somehow. he didnt force anyone to hurt the other, but he played with matches & never got hurt.

Shigure must be glad akito stabbed kureno. Not cuz he’s sadistic or bad person. He isn’t, but cuz akito stabbing kureno is akito cutting her bond with him. Go shigure, your girl removed her lover with blood. Kureno is punished for sleeping with ur girl by blood! so, when is ur punishment for sleeping with ur lover’s mom? none? ok.

The animation is good. They didnt villinize akito by drawing extra manic features like se02. Kyo’s broken & tormented face once again epicly drawn. However, akito’s slaps on tohru’s face were comedic, unnecessary & such bad taste! Stop using violence for extra drama, furuba!

Also, tohru, I love you, I understand you are broken but charging at a person, who has a history of violence & physical abuse & holding a knife, is stupid. No other description. I’m glad she didnt accidentally kill you in her initial rage.

Everything akito’s redemption, kureno & shigure are part 2 in my review.

[words-for-holland]

Apple Tree Kisses | T.H.

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: The boys take Y/N out for apple picking on their day off. Much fun. Much cuteness. And lots and lots of apples.

A/N: So maybe another mini installment of fall adventures with Tom? Well see how it goes. Hoenstly dont even know I feel about this one lol.

“We’re going apple picking this fall right?” Y/N asked the boys as they all sat down, scrolling through their phone in their cozy Berlin suite. Neither letting out an answer, as they all sighed in unison.

“Right?” Y/N asked again. “Tom, right?” She playfully shoved his shoulder hoping to grab her boyfriend’s attention. Y/N could easily see the slight smirk that grew on his face. Of course, Tom was never one to ignore his girlfriend, but he loved to tease her when it came to doing things she really wanted to do. In all the years they’ve been together, he knew Y/N was the most indecisive person in the world but when she knew what she wanted...she knew exactly what she wanted and would go the distance to get it.

“Mmm I dont know Y/N. We might be busy.” He chuckled, his pink sleeves engulfing Y/N in a cozy bear hug.

“Cmonnn. It’ll be fun. We cant miss it this year. It’s tradition.” She reasoned.

“I know Darling. Soon. I promise.” Tom gave her a chaste kiss on her slightly chapped frown, which slowly turned into the smile he always loved to see.

Needless to say, soon came a lot faster than Y/N anticipated. As she wrapped up a few emails from work, Tom, Harry, and Sam stood before her, leaning over the table, giving the Goofy Holland smile. “Whats up with you three?” Y/N giggled.

“We’re going on a trip. So you better get ready.” Sam answered as he walked away.

“Better hurry up before we leave you.” Harry joked around as he made his way out as well.

“I do suggest you wear something cute. I mean, you always look cute. You’re perfect, but Im just saying that red plaid shirt you got in the closet...just does things to me.” He groans, making his way to their room to get ready as well.

Y/N playfully rolls her eyes and scoffs out a chuckle. Of course all the boys finished up before her as they head to the car waiting for Y/N. She appears, wearing Tom’s suggestion with a white top undeneath the plaid shirt and black leggings, opening the door and sitting beside her giddy boyfriend, who was smiling from ear to ear. He sported a denim jacket and pants with a white shirt underneath and navy blue baseball hat, much like his character Arvin from Devil All the Time. Of course Tom very well knew, this look did things to Y/N after the first time she saw the film with him, making comments about how hot he looked as a southern bad boy. “Well you’re looking mighty fine there miss.” Tom flirts, displaying his southern accent for Y/N.

“Why thank you kind sir. You’re not too bad yourself.” She responds back, smirking at his comment. Tom leans in quickly to give her a small peck...only to go back in for another. And another..and another...

“Ugh, can we save the flirting and snogging till after the car ride. Please. Im trying to keep my lunch down for the next hour.” Harry groaned in the front seat.

“Sorry Harry.” The love birds mumble as they sit in their respective seats.

For those wondering, Harry did indeed survive the hour drive while keeping his lunch in tact. The group arrived at the German apple orchard called Alstead farms where they were dropped off at front.

Y/N took in her surroundings. Seeing the fall foliage, with autumn colored leaves sprinking the walkways, the sounds of the busy stands of food and fresh produce, the smell of freshly fried apple cider donuts it reminded her exactly why fall was her favorite season.

“Cmon darling, you’re supposed to be day dreaming about me not those apple cider donuts.” Tom teases as he grabs her hand in his.

“Trust me mate, I wouldnt blame Y/N if she was. Those donuts were absolutely amazing..” Sam muffled as he shoved another donut in his mouth.

“Oi, you already got yours?! And didnt even bother to share?” Harry questioned as he tried to grab the crumbled bag of sugary goodness.

Sam rolled his eyes at he reluctantly lent his last donut to his brother. The four grabbed their wagon, maps, and bags, ready to gather as much apples as they could. They went row by row, picking up macintosh, fuji, honey crisps, and empires. They tasted each one closing their eyes in delight, and scrunching their faces with ones that werent so sweet.

Harry took pictures of the surrounding and as he turned around he was given the perfect angle to capture a sweet moment between Tom and Y/N.

The two had their hands interlaced as they admired one tree with golden hues on the apple. Tom leaned in towards Y/N’s ear as he told her a funny apple pun, kissing the top of her head. When Y/N turned around to hear the clicks of the camera, she proceeded to cross her eyes and stick her tongue out.

“Thats attractive.” Harry comments with a hint of sarcasm as he looks through his camera. They all knew how camera shy Y/N got when she was aware of her picture being taken. In her words, posing for the camera while acting natural, made her feel like an awkward deer that’s about to get run over over....Dont ask, its a long story. “Okay, wait the lighting and this tree is perfect though. I want you and Tom up on that tree.” He commanded as he pointed at the sturdy tree with curly branches.

“Uhh...you sure about this?” Y/N asked, in an apprehensive tone. “What if I fall?”

“Oh c’mon darling you know I wont let you.” Tom said as he grabbed her hand to reassure you. “I’m not gonna let you fall. Ill hold on to you the entire time.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Sam, hold the apples for them and I’m begging you to please not eat my share.” Harry groaned at the thought.

Tom and Y/N had situated themselves on the tree not as high up from the ground as they had anticipated. At first they took a photostanding up. Tom towering over her as he stepped onto the higher branch, one arm hanging on the branch above him and another holding onto Y/N’s hand. They smiled and looked into each others eyes completely forgetting that they were on a tree and Harry was taking their pictures. Y/N took his navy hat and placed it on her own as they laughed. Tom licked his lips at the sight and couldnt help but to lean in, “You look so hot right now.”

“Oh god, stop you know thats not true.” Y/N giggles as her cheeks are tinted with a light pink blush. Tom continued to look at her smiling, and buting his lips. He really couldnt contain himself when she was acting this adorable. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you want to eat me.”

Tom laughs out loud at her comment. “But I kinda do...like everyday.”

“TOM WERE IN PUBLIC!” She squeals covering face.

“Okay love birds, stop the flirting and give me one more pose. If you can manage just kiss each other without falling, I think it’d be perfect.” Harry instructs.

“Dont have to tell me twice, brother.” Tom replies as he looks down at Y/N, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Tom he said kiss not snogg, dont get any ideas. We’re in public!” Sam yelled out.

“You three are such debbie downers, I swear.” Tom pouts.

“Yeah yeah, come on lover boy.” Y/N says curling her index finger to gesture him to lean forward. Tom happily accepts, as he leans down pressin his lips against her soft glossed ones. They stayed like this for sometime, feeling the slight tingles that came with it. Slowly...so very slowly did they pull away, but only for Tom to come in for two small pecks...three...well maybe four...Okay five but that was it.

“Wow...these actually came out good.” Harry said atonished by how well he captured the sweet moment between his brother and Y/N. Tom who was very excited to see how their came out, jumped down from the tree as he made his way towards Harry. Meanwhile Y/N took her time trying to make sure she didnt completely fall off the tree. Sam was watching Y/N as he had his phone recording her. He didnt think there would be much but knowing how clumsy she was anything was game.

She was barely 2 feet off the ground, but for some reason it felt like the empire state building. “Wha-Okay.” She speaks out as she takes a leap of faith. Y/N sticks the landing, she walks toward Sam, Tom, and Harry with confidence that only lasted 0.5 seconds.

Thump

“WHAAA.” Y/N sqeuals, as the branch hits her straight on the face.

While all three boy were heavily concerned, they couldnt help but laugh so hard at what happened to poor Y/N.

“IM SO GLAD I GOT THAT ON VIDEO.” Sam yells out, tears of laughter streaming down his face.

“My god that was priceless. Please send that to me.” Harry says emoting the same expression as his twin brother.

“Darling, are you okay?” Tom says stifling a laugh, as he checks her precious face. “How did you manage to hit the tree?”

“Honestly I dont know.” She cries laughing. “These things just happen.”

“It’s okay.” Tom places feather light kisses on the corner of her eye. “C’mon lets get you an apple cider donut.”

“This is going on instagram I hope you know that.” Harry yells out as the couple walks away.

[bananaman-mp3]

six

theres a security search the next day - happens once or twice a year, this time its the third-, and a royal servant red shows up with the officers, and addresses mare.

okay- shes been summoned to summerton- a thing that apparently Never Happens To Reds, but apparently its not because of the thing that happened yesterday? (x) doubt.jpeg. all of her family silently says goodby in their own way each- do they really think theyll kill her??? is that how normal this is?? i shouldnt even be surprised at this point the reds just live in a fucked up society (insert joker memes here). she whispers i love you to them- goddamnit stop.

they take her and she looks at kilorns house as they leave. she remembers farley was expecting her payment today and shell be disappointed.

they take her away in a transport and past the hall and officers with no protests, despite the mentions of travelers being checked all over. mare attributes this to the servant lady being well known.

she -ann walsh, now- ever so helpfully, tells mare shes from the stilts like her and knew tramy and bree- whos mentioned to have been a heartbreaker? -and tells her shes going to work here, telling her as if she knew what this is about.

mare assumes it was cals doing, he pulled some strings and got her a job. if this is true consider me an official cal simp™

mare feels incredibly relieved abt it, even considers she could ask cal to do the same for kilorn!

now walsh takes her down to a dark tunnel, that leads to the hall of the sun. when mare asks, she just responde that she serves the king now.

things are kinda busy today, lady walsh says, more than ever before. mare mentions shes seen more silvers going upriver than ever even for that time of the year. she asks whats going on, and walsh tells her it Elect The New Queen Day for the first time in 20 years. wooooooow original. the “daughters of the high houses” aka a bunch of silver girls are gonna compete for throne. and by compete im guessing theyre gonna stand and look pretty and the one whos best at it gets the spot. i can already see where this is going and not just because i read the back summary of this book. i just hope they execute it well enough that its not tedious to read through.

oh my fucking god the next line is already mare roasting the concept of choosing a queen: “So, what, they do a spin, say a few words, bat their eyelashes?” mare i love you so much girl. i know i underestimated you when i began reading but you are shaping up to be a good character.

lady walsh is weirdly mysterious abt it, its some “youll see for yourself” type’ deal. mare joins the other servants, but lady walsh doesnt, -which makes her nervous- into the spiral garden, where the silver queenies are.

the spiral gardens are described as resembling the arena back home, which makes mare uncomfortable. her powers seem to be on the verge bc of it even if she doesnt know it yet. she works, helping the cooks and cleaning.

queenstrial starts.

a bunch of silver families enter, they all wear different colors to differentiate themselves i suppose. one of the silvers she recognizes as samson merandus, a whisper (mind reader) from the arena fight.

mare is called to serve on a table of a silver family and she overhears a conversation where she absolutely destroys a character we are just introduced: “I assume he is the one unfortunate enough to be called Ptolemus.” and she is RIGHT. anyway the silvers complain abt having to wait for the royals to show up. just abt the kind of whining rich ppl would do. and do irl too.

mare points out the obvious what kinda problems would the high class have with royalty? but she cant eavesdrop, bc thats not allowed and bc a sound announces that things are about to happen. mare says its like the beginning of the first friday feats and somthn tells me that it is, kind of. lets see. if this ceremony is abt girls slaughtering each other this might be interesting.

the king enters, and mare remarks how he is fatter than in the coins. hm. she point out how he wears his victories proudly despite not being the one who fights. his name is tiberias calore the sixth, king of norta. the queen is mentioned to be kin with samsons house. her names elara, the king mentions. oh yena he gives a whole introductory speech after someone screams about wanting to end the scarlet guard.

they introduce prince maven of house calore and merandus son of the queen? thats a mouthful. the other one, crown prince of house calore and jacos, son of queen coriane. hes the heir of norta. tiberias the seventh bc they licheraly cant come up with a different name apparently WAIT HOLD UP ITS CAL???? HUH?????????

[hawksextracrispy]

I keep seeing the take of Hawks' self perception as an abuse victim who made it (and thus he doesn't understand why other people cant) and I dunno. I see where its coming from but its honestly a little at odds with what we've seen of his character and is, I think, pretty symptomatic of a worldview that thats uncomfortable acknowledging anything good Endeavor may have done. Which is understandable, but it holds us back from understanding Hawks; the good Endeavor has done is key to his sense of self.

Hawks is pretty clearly uncomfortable thinking of HIMSELF as a victim. He cut all ties with his past and insists thats what makes him functional. But I don't think he's unconscious of the fact that he needed aid (albeit a very particular kind of manipulative and exploitative aid) in order to get to that position in life.

Lets go back to the Twice fight.

I think the wording here is pretty essential. Typical hero-villain call and response is "its never too late to do the right thing". Hawks doesnt do that. He acknowledges three things here.

1. The fact that Twice's villainy is more based on circumstance than on actual ill intent. This is something Twice himself acknowledges. If hed been luckier, he wouldnt be here. This is Hawks acknowedging he didnt choose to be put into this situation (much like he didnt choose to be put into his own environment)

2. An offer to get him out. Again, a re-emphasis on providing him with the tools to get out of his situation if he wants it. Not "I believe you can get out of this" or a simple "come with me", but "I will get you out of here"

3.An affirmation that Jin is already a good person. Not that he can become one, but that he is one.

Now, Im aware of the irony of calling this action compassionate when hes got Twice surrounded with weapons. Im not saying Twice should be grateful here OR that Keigo is doing the right thing. But I dont see that kind of bootstraps mentality that keeps being attributed to him after 299. I think its a desperate gesture from a guy who knows deep down that it wont be accepted, and even if it was, is aware of the systemic blindspots that will let Twice slip through again and again. He never once condemns Twice for failing to "make it" either implicitly or explicitly.

Its not really directed at Shoto either. We see exactly one shot of Shoto, and its implictly Hawks reflecting on the way Shoto looked at Endeavor at the one point in time where Hawks has seen them interact. Based on the fact that Hawks has Tomie in his life at all, I think he knows what it looks like when a kid has some mixed feelings towards their parent. He's currently going off the only information he has, given that hes had at most six hours to process the information, he doesnt know most of the Todorokis, and hes got his own baggage bound up in Endeavor.

He doesnt even condemn Dabi for what he said. He doesnt say "it cant have been that bad". He says "I dont think its like that anymore". Which (and I know this is controversial) is in some very real sense true. Endeavor is not suddenly a paragon of virtue, but is putting the behaviors that created Touya behind him. The way he treats Shoto, Natsu, and Fuyumi are not the same as when Touya was a child. That doesn't erase it, which Endeavor himself acknowledges AGAIN AND AGAIN. But its more than enough give for someone who desperately needs him to be a hero to latch onto.

Endeavor, for better or worse, was Hawks' first hero (and believe me, you can make a lot out of the fact that the All Might plush was too expensive to get lmao). He was the one who made the idea that Keigo could be safe, could be protected (even in a DEEPLY impersonal way) real. He is still so integral to Hawks' ability to believe in heros

But in his mind, Endeavor's is. He can save the day. In order Hawks to believe in heroes, in order for Hawks to believe in himself....he has to believe that there is some kind of good that can come from Endeavor still being a hero.

So no, I dont think Hawks is wondering why other abuse victims cant just let the past die. I think him clinging onto Enji is in fact very symptomatic of Hawks clinging desperately onto his own past. Endeavor was his helping hand out of a very dark place when he was a child. I dont think its unreasonable to say that hes hoping to climb that ladder out again. Whether or not thats the right thing, I think its a very real response to finding out the guy who saved you may have been the villain in another person's story.

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, ep 12-16 thoughts! these episodes, in comparison to the first 10 or so, felt way more laid back and low-stakes, which I appreciate sometimes. I didn't appreciate how lazy jack's halfa design was in masters of time, it made me so annoyed I redesigned it. 👎🏻 u_u

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-'picking a fight with me and my upgraded form!' 'you upgraded to a mullet?' DANNNNY. YOU CANT SAY THAT TO TECHNUS. YOUVE HAD A MULLET TWICE NOW ('fun' split danny, and evil future danny BOTH HAD THEM). I HAVE THE RECEIPTS.

-danny seeing technus hurting valerie and yelling I AM GOING TO BREAK YOU IN HALF. SAMEEEE <3

-axion labs is now a part of vladco. FUCK YOU VLAD. hes not even really IN this episode, but just thought I'd throw out a nice fuck you anyway.

-'capable of blasting a single person into space in (2) minutes!' tucker. that would kill someone. i mean yeah they might get to space, but theres NO WAY THEY WOULDNT CATCH FIRE, OR THEIR ORGANS WOULDNT LIQUIFY BECAUSE OF THE STRAIN. THEY'D PROBABLY PASS OUT BEFORE THEN, BUT. ...no, okay, I get why vlad bought this company. this is RIGHT up his alley.

-danny KNOWS VAL DIDNT DO THIS, THAT SOMEONE STOLE THE SUIT. AND SPENDING ALL NIGHT CHATTING WITH HER. <3 and val is a 9TH DEGREE BLACKBELT?? danny's mom is, too!! omg and she hunts ghosts, his parents would love her. and her fav fruit is kumquat bc its a funny word. im so with danny val is amazing. I love her and I Do Not Want To Hear It From Sam.

-I knew danny wanted to be an astronaut, but the bowling tidbit is like. yes give me more useless info abt these characters, I love tiny details that make them feel more human, and im glad hes got hobbies aside from ghost stuff, we dont really see a lot of that!!! (I mean, we knew 'fun' danny from when he split himself in half liked bowling, so obv it makes sense he LIKES it, but hes very GOOD at it. so proud of him, bowling king) val calling him neil armstrong and them teasing each other. LOVE THAT.

-technus you are my favorite grandpa for setting this up. SAM WHY ARE YOU BEING SO CREEPY BE HAPPY FOR YOUR FRIEND!!! STOP SPYING ON THEM!!! who actually cares if technus did 'set them up' together, theyre having fun and enjoy each others company!!! 'you think the universe wants you two to be together?' 'i dunno, but maybe /I/ do!' EXACTLY DANNY!!! SOO TRUE.

-and valerie being happy sam said she wants to try and be happy for them and make room at the lunch table for them. and hugging sam over it. VAL NEEDS MORE FRIENDS.

-VAL GOING AFTER TECHNUS IN HER SUIT WITH (1) MILK, AND (1) TREE BRANCH AND KEYS!!!. I LOVE YOUUUU BEST GIRL. her new suit kicks ass

-dannys like 'HEY IM AN ASTRONAUT :D' AW. ...HES IN SPACE... the fact he's actually intending to give her the ring. with SAMS NAME ON IT?? IM CRINGING DANNY NO. YOU CANT DO THAT...thank god he didnt. thank god valerie cut it off and said they can just stay friends for now. tbh, they both have a lot on their plates!! they obv both still like each other...it can be a future thing!! when she knows about phantom! youre 14 theres no need to rush. I just want her to have friends and be happy :(

-...danny struggles to do (1) pull up. SAME. but all the ghost fighting in phantom form REALLY doesnt carry over at ALL? that sucks

-sam being as fit as she is, is not just a goth. shes a goth jock.

-honey I Shrank Our Kid, One of his Enemies, and his Bully: the episode

-dash's crush on phantom is So Obvious. fitness buddies :) watching them interact always makes me laugh. also, phantom, with PANTS. 'how many costume changes you gonna go through, what is this, vegas??' DASSH DJKSFHASKDF

-MADDIE GOING AFTER THE MOUSE WITH A BROOM, WHAT THE FUCK. AAAH. JUST BUY SOME KIND OF MOUSE TRAP.

-danny likes lime and vinegar chips. which sound very good.

-'our boy finally has the physical prowess of a 60 year old president!' ...poor danny LMAO

-'what's wrong with beauty pageants' oh tucker you sweet naïve child. what ISNT wrong with them. who approved this for a high school?? (I mean, yes. unfortunately child pageants exist, but...) also danny and tucker once again treating the pretty girls like objects. I need to meet the grown man who wrote this, I just want to talk...

-prince aragon's dragon form reminds me of maleficent (color scheme wise) which is always a bonus. considering the episode is called beauty marked, I feel like the sleeping beauty references are deliberate

-sam with the fake fangs. once again her accessories never miss. hate the 'not like other girls, girls who get sucked into this kind of thing are all shallow and all want to be carbon copies' bs tho.

-sam trying to be the Worst Bride, being rude as shit. DORA IS GOING TO GET KILLED. DID YOU MISS THE PART WHERE SHE SAID THE PRINCE WILL HAVE HER HEAD IF YOU ARENT THE IDEAL BRIDE. YOU /KNOW/ DANNY WILL COME SAVE YOU. JUST ACT CHILL UNTIL THEN. even if you were doing fine to get him to take off the crown, consider maybe not letting his poor sister get punished also?? sure, she could also take off the crown and has dragon powers, but did you know that for sure?? dora didnt even really realize it until you guys talked!! (or at least, she was scared to stand up to him. you had no guarantee she would...) but. good for dora. ANOTHER friendly ghost to add to the List :)

-tucker is so under appreciated in his time. if he was doing a tech-based campaign today he'd have a better shot. people in 2004 had NO IDEA how much tech would be a part of our day-to-day lives...altho. tbh if you're going to be running for student council president, maybe you should..focus on things to actually improve the school? since he's going for a tech angle, he could say like, he would be running fundraisers for the schools computers to be upgraded, etc? we've already SEEN he can be good at money-making entrepreneur type stuff!!

-oh my god wait. this episode is JUST YUGIOH?????! A REBORN PHAROH USING A TEENAGER AS A VESSEL?? YESSSSSS

-tucker using his new minion to feed him grapes and carry him. AND LOCUSTS ONTO THE BULLIES. I love how when he's possessed, he gains winged eyeliner.

-this episode is giving me big 'plankton makes everyone in bikini bottom his slaves and build monuments of him from the spongebob movie' vibes. and the pharaoh has a traitor who works for him? VERY big yugioh vibes. aknadin confirmed

-I like that danny is still completely exhausted after using ghostly wail. (still patiently waiting on him to get duplication)

-LOVE the fenton's 80s outfits. I get hes 14 and embarrassed by everything they do because theyre his parents, but. cmon, this is one objectively cool thing theyve done. love 80s fashion.

-...was vlad just standing on that streetlight waiting for danny to come out? how'd he know they'd be coming out the back? how long has he been up there???

-oh, wait, his ecto-acne has flareups? that SUCKS. danny was...well I dont want to say he was LUCKY HE HALF-DIED, but he was lucky his was pretty instant (I'm assuming that had to do with the power/scale of the portals being different?) I remember in the ep we met him, vlad made a point of saying he was stuck in a hospital for a long time, so. that really actually sucks and I feel bad. not that it excuses anything he's done...but like. it does suck.

-vlad being so sure danny wouldnt help him he made it somehow contagious to his friends to make sure he'd get help? danny is a nice boy, he wouldve helped if it was anyone else. the only reason he wouldn't have is because of the shit vlad did to him, on purpose. vlad 100% dug his own grave by being the biggest asshole, so it is very hard to feel bad for him.

-clockwork is back!!! and making danny learn lessons The Hard Way. Uhhh, okay. I kind of get Danny’s logic, that time traveling this far back would prevent vlad from becoming a halfa also, ergo no arch nemesis or ectoacne to worry about. But the fact that was basically the first solution Danny came up with to solve this problem is actually so funny. It’s so extreme

-APPRICIATION FOR THESE 80S LESBIAN BG CHARACTERS.

-vlad telling maddie in the lab (in the 80s) he has something he's wanted to tell her 'for a long time'...how long have they known each other? I assumed they met in college, since jack always calls vlad his college buddy/roommate, so jack and vlad for sure met in college, but did vlad know maddie longer? thats surprising if so. Tho we don’t know what year of college they’re in so they could mean they met as freshmen and a few years have past…speaking of maddie shes crushing the 80s look.

-vlad blames jack, but. maybe dont stick your face 2 inches from the portal??! THIS FEELS LIKE LAB SAFETY BASICS. IF SOMETHING HAS POTENTIAL TO BE DANGEROUS, DONT GET NEAR IT. WITH YOUR FACE UNPROTECTED IN ANY WAY. (altho jack didnt really give a Big Warning besides screaming BONZAI. so. also that, but cmon.) also, they need gloves, goggles, and to pull all of their hair back tbh. but fuck lab safety, I guess!

-cryyyyinnng at how lazy they were with jack's ghost form design, its just plasmius' design on jack!!! you couldve given him his own design!!

-there. I did that in about 10 minutes and its somehow less lazy than what made it into the show. embarrassing! better yet, I think the episode would've been better if maddie would've gotten the ectoacne. or maybe its just me, wanting to see her design! anyway. I'm sure people have already done redesigns of them both as halfas. I have to go look after I finish this watch through. Also mildly frustrated jacks resentment and bitterness is basically also a copy paste of vlads backstory. They’re different characters, I really don’t think jack would stew in bitterness and jealousy the same way vlad would!! I also don’t think he’d give up after one time of trying to hunt ghosts and getting laughed at. Our canon timeline says different…I dunno, I get it was for laughs, but I’m annoyed because the POTENTIAL this plot has…

-did vlad really wear a stupid cheese hat to his wedding. ok actually that kinda rules. and the cheese door knocker. the dairy-only buffet table. vlad still got rich, just on being the New Dairy King. (Assuming that means he owns a lot of dairy businesses?) ok! this actually is great. hope maddie isn't lactose intolerant!

-'no matter how hard I tried, I could never get rid of my ghost half, the half I knew Maddie could never accept' ohh, ouch, what a horrible thing to say to her HALF GHOST SON. 'YOUR MOM WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU' BASICALLY.

-maddie strapping danny to the table with a lazer pointed at him in a secret lab she keeps from vlad that she makes a point of saying is sound proof so he can scream all he wants...CHRIST. DANNYS POOR PYSCHE.

-also, not to feel bad for alternate vlad (because, he did lie to maddie saying jack blames her and never wants to see her again...) but. being married to a woman 20+ years and she immediately goes back to jack? if she didnt love vlad and feels like she had to hide shit from him, and says she wasted her best years with him, WHY MARRY HIM. it feels like leading him on!!! cannot believe im feeling bad for vlad, but. this alternate timeline vlad is significantly Less Horrible than Our Vlad. did she not think she'd get funding for her ghost stuff? (which, fair assumption since they're considered 'ghost fanatics/nuts in canon...but...) why did she think jack or vlad would be her ONLY OPTIONS? be like your sister. be single. Actually, this au could’ve been really interesting if after the accident, vlad lied to her and said jack never wanted to see her again, but she stays single. Imagine how much that would bug vlad… like, in her mind, it was never a competition it was jack or no one type situation…

-danny being like 'leave him ALONE' this jack is a HOMEWRECKER, DANNY. let them go to court and settle this at the least. ...or just throw vlad into the portal. (100% human, defenseless vlad) CHRIST, MADDIE THATS BRUTAL. THATS MURDER.

-danny seeing his mom immediately accepting him and his dad being half ghosts in this universe, if I was him this would be a great sign that his universe's maddie would also.

-*maddie voice* "clockwork will help!" *2 seconds later, with clockwork* "I will Not Help." TOUGH LOVE KING. YES LET DANNY SEE THE SODA HIMSELF AND DEVOLP BETTER OBSERVATION SKILLS.

-when clockwork ""reset time to the way it was"" just before danny "meddled"" ...did he really erase a whole alternate timeline? ...damn. because maddie and danny both called it an alternate timeline by name, it splitting when the college incident went different, so it wouldnt have really mattered if he reset it, right. like because danny's timeline is on a different stream? why didnt clockwork just. show danny a replay and not Reset That Timeline. wh...I wonder how many people that Erased From Existence. Anyway! once again stating clockwork is casually terrifying!

[faerielleart]

I love that they are friends before lovers! Honestly, it feels so refreshing rather than “i’d die for you” it’s a mutual feeling of “i love you; we are going to get through this together” that love is so important, it goes unnoticed quite often...

you said it anon!

i have to confess that i usually tend to ship enemies to lovers rather than friends to lovers because i really freaking love the angst, the misunderstandings, the attempted murder once or twice lmao no seriously, it’s a trope that i really enjoy cause i love love love redemption arcs and the slow steps towards a reluctant friendship and then finally BOOM they’re in love like thats my type of shit

levihan (and royai but im not really deep into the fma fandom bc i was far too young when it was at its peak hhh and i got to grow up through aot so yeah im more attached to levi and hanji rather than roy and riza tho i love them both) is just too god tier. literally god tier. i dont even know how to explain it but: God Tier. the healthiest, deepest, most beautiful, most special bond i have ever seen in two characters across all the media i’ve consumed. what you say, “i love you; we are going to get through this together” rather than “i’d die for you”, i see if fundamentally tied to the fact that their relationship is completely, 100% EQUAL on literally every level. i love this ship SO MUCH bc their bond gives me the kind of emotional maturity that i crave and dont usually get from any of my other ships and fucKING HELL HAJIME ISAYAMA fucking hell hajime isayama. Fucking hell hajime isayama

i just idk man i cant even think of these two old fucks without getting teary eyed. i could write my bachelor’s degree thesis, my master’s degree thesis and my doctorate thesis about them. im tired of even having to label them. who tf cares about platonic shit romantic shit whatever shit like these words just sound so???? trivial???? mundane????? i dont think a word that completely encapsulates the meaning of their bond exists. it’s the kind of shit that goes beyond life and death. they ARE each other’s person and they ARE soulmates. you dont have telepathy with anyone am i right ladies n gents? ;D

also. who tf needs words anyway. their actions speak louder than everything to me. it’s in the subtext, in their subtle acts of caring for the other, it’s in their utter trust of the other, it’s in their constantly watching the other’s back (hello rts panel on top of the walls), it’s in their noticing when the other needs to be cheered up, it’s in their knowing exactly what the other needs to say. lemme give you an example: if i had to use two sentences which sound similar and mean the same thing but in my opinion have profoundly different nuances, their relationship is not a “what can i do for you?”, it’s a “what do you need?”. i hope i got my point across with these two sentences. furthermore, it’s in them having lost so so so much but still having each other to lean on, it’s in them being able to lift each other’s burdens by pure, unquestioned support of the other in every single moment, it’s in their bickering, in their constant looking out for the other. ya know that song that literally every singer that existed on earth sang at some point in their carrer, “you raise me up”? thats literally them. “you raise me up so i can stand on mountains, you raise me up to walk on stormy seas, i am strong when i am on your shoulders, you raise me up to more than i can be”. they literally bring out the best in each other, they are each other’s rock, they are able to let go of their masks and be vulnerable around each other.

and personally, to me that says a lot, like, a lot more than any kind of explicit confession, any kind of kiss, any kind of conventionally romantic gesture, any kind of label.

who needs “conventional” anyway? they’re abnormals. abnormals know and need no conventionality. thats my two cents 🤙

[jostens-pitch]

headcanon that simon has a chronic stutter:

since he grew up being moved from foster home to foster home, simon never properly learned how to speak or articulate his thoughts

this results in him developing a stutter

he cant say any words that start with “s”, which is painfully ironic given his name is simon snow. he draws out the “s” sound and ends up sounding like a snake. he also has trouble with words like “charlotte” and the letters “b” “p” “m” “n” and “c”. practically the whole alphabet is his enemy

because of his stutter the kids in the foster homes all mock him and laugh at him, making the stutter worse for simon

he becomes a quiet kid who refuses to use his words in fear of embarrassing himself

he sees some speech therapists, but because theyre appointed by the government, simon never sees the same therapist twice

this causes his stutter to get worse. he tries to fix it himself and developes a nasty habit of using fillers in sentences like “um” “uh” and “like” repeatedly

by the time hes 11 hes given up any hope of becoming normal and being able to speak without fear

when he gets to watford and realizes how important it is to say phrases just right to make spells work, it feels like hes in his own kind of personal hell

the professors at watford do their best to help simon, but in the magik world a stutter is something that is a tragedy to mages as it hinders their speaking capabilities

because of his stutter, simons magic is even more pathetic and chaotic than it should be and his classmates all whisper about it

during simons first year, the mage is constantly trying to find a “cure” for simons stutter and is always quickly frustrated by how long it takes simon to say something

this causes him to retreat further into himself and only speak when absolutely needed (it takes penny a year to get simon to start speaking again)

for a while, penny is the only person who understands that simons stutter isnt something of a tragedy: its just who he is

shes also very protective of simon and his speech impediment. anyone who even glances at simon oddly while hes speaking to them is sure to be jinxed by miss penelope bunce herself

and as for simons relationship with baz throughout their watford years:

simon notices pretty quickly that baz’s taunts never revolve around his speech impediment. baz is many things, mostly a dick, but at least he isnt someone who mocks speech impediments. its something that is oddly comforting to simon. baz may make his life miserable, but at least he knows not to make fun of something simon cant fix

as simon gets older his stutter becomes something he can kinda control (which hes quite proud of) but like every person with a chronic stutter: it gets bad when hes anxious or stressed

baz makes simon anxious and stressed

they share a room

as established above: baz is a dick

you can see simons problem

now baz ? he finds simons stutter endearing and maybe intentionally irritates simon just to hear him say, “p-p-p...phhh..piss o-off !!!”

baz isnt proud of it and knows that its probably something very offensive to stutterers, but to him its what makes simon so human. the chosen one, the heros of all heros, can barely say his own name without jumbling over his words

simon comes to learn that the only time he doesnt stutter is when hes defending others

baz notices this too and is disgusted by how in love that makes him feel

overtime simon slowly begins to accept his stutter and that it will probably always be a part of him, though he still prefers to use actions rather than words

when simon and baz get together, they develope a system that allows them to communicate without words. simon cherishes it dearly

baz also encourages simon to talk about his stutter. simon knows its baz’s way of getting simon to open up more to speaking, but he loves that baz tries to help

they have long conversations every night about how simons stutter feels (painful and like hes choking)

how baz can help simon during a bad stutter fit (dont try and guess what simon is trying to say. dont say the word for simon. just sit there patiently and wait)

if simon should give speech therapy another try (maybe, but for now simon is content with where he is)

what methods simon uses to speak smoothly (visualizing the words helps simon. and repeating what he wants to say numerous times inside his head)

in the end, baz’s dedication to helping and understanding simon’s stutter, along with penny’s fierce protectiveness over him, are what really help simon accept himself

simon’s stutter will never be cured, but for once the thought doesnt make him anxious or ashamed. he has two awesome people who love him as he is. thats what matters to simon. they keep him going

might add more but i was researching my stuttering condition late at night and needed something comforting. so why not project my insecurities onto my comfort characters ? we need more stutter representation (done correctly) anyways x

*please note that i myself have a chronic stutter. all experiences listed here are my own. if anyone tries to tell me im wrong i will cry

[princeseerow]

thoughts on animorphs: the visitor: the graphic novel

in roughly the order that i thought of them

changing rachels bald eagle morph from a male to a female was so immediately weird to me that, 2 pages into my read, i stopped to give a 15 minute rant about this to my non fandalite fans over discord. conclusion: its such a small and yet ultimately unnecessary change that i dont understand why it happened at all, or why they even brought attention to it

i still cant say i love this art style but it has its moments. i thought marcos new hairstyle was a nice touch, and i was like "i bet hes growing it out to appease the long haired marco truthers (aka the entire fandom" and then he basically confirmed it in his own words not too many pages later. also i thought rachels different hairstyles were cute

that being said, i just cannot get over the sameface in this series. i couldnt pin down exactly what it was in the first one, but i just realized this time that the kids all have the same nose shape, eye color (or lack thereof, but thats not inherently a bad thing), and face shape. not a great sign, considering this one book features 4 blonde female characters with similar hairstyles and faces. but at least mrs chapman very obviously looks like an adult i guess. also im disappointed we didnt get to see sara too

also ive said this before about animorphs but this really does highlight the lack of recurring characters of color versus white blondes specifically

even when he was cracking jokes a lot of marcos facial expressions struck me as kind of strange? reading this alone, i would never have gotten the impression that marco was the jokester of the group

cassies overalls finally make an appearance in this book. twice actually -- one with long pants and one with shorts.

the change of making one of the teenagers shooting at birds at the opening scene of this book the same as the guy who harasses rachel on the street later is.... certainly A Choice, I Guess. i almost thought he might be plot relevant somehow because of it. and who knows, maybe he will be in a future installment, but without having that info at hand right now it just seems unnecessary

i actually thought they did a good job of conveying the unsettling atmosphere of the chapmans' house. seeing these humans act so obviously and yet subtly un-human was one of my favorite parts of the book and i always wished wed gotten to see more of that behavior during the series, just to really hammer home how creepy it all is

that one exchange with melissa and chapman ("dad, why didnt you say anything" "i didnt notice you" "but... i was crying.") is just so nicely heartbreaking, as was the scene with melissa asking fluffer!rachel why her parents dont love her anymore. poor girl.

rachels shrew nightmare also went so hard

oh my god visser three has WHITE SCLERA? HE HAS HUMAN EYES? was that a thing in the first graphic novel? i dont have it with me so i cant check but gosh thats so weird. i thought at first it was just a quirk of their holographic facetime, because obviously the display wont be true to life, but no when he shows up in person at the end of the book his face eyes are still white with black pupils, and his stalk eyes dont have pupils at all. give us green andalite eyes back you cowards.

i still love how much visser three loves cats

all in all i liked it! cant wait until the next one comes out

[mychemicalaromanticism]

things ive already established r on this post

besties this got so fucking long but heres a giant ramble about cherri

okay so. there are huge differences betwn cherri as a hyperviolent drac hunter and cherri as a friend of the four and cherri as the girls mentor. with the first one he was 17 and desperate to distance himself from his upbringing so he went all in on Being A Killjoy. he was always one of the first ppl to rush into a fight and he fought hard. he blew up his fuckin hand with that attitude. and all the while he was just racking up more unaddressed trauma and eventually he ran away from that, too. giving himself radiation poisoning was more appealing than facing his problems.

so as a teenager/young adult hes kind of constantly in a panicked state. hes scared the people from his past are going to find him and drag him back with them. so he lashes out and he runs away over and over again.

i said in another post that he has some past life shit goin on which usually would give him a connection to the witch that manifests early in life, but with all the stuff hes gone through he has been Preoccupied. he can become oblivious to almost anything that doesnt apply to whatever hes focused on. not in a hyperfocus way its likeeeeee. when u live on survival mode during prolonged periods of stress. hes immune to magic bullshit bc hes too tired and scared.

anyways around his mid-20s he finally has a little more stability (as much as the average person living in the zones can have, that is) and he finally notices that Weird Stuff happens around him. basically: out of my list of Powers People Connected To The Witch Have he has the prophetic dreams/enhanced intuition as well as a form of sensing ghosts where he can see auras and kind of like, echoes of past events in ppls lives. that look like auras. itz complicated and not of utmost importance so im leaving it at that.

anyways thats what makes him start writing poetry. just 4 funsies he'll describe his weird experiences and embellish them to make em pretty. just as a casual hobby n all that.

he would forget fun ghoul in between the times they ran into each other but its pretty easy to be reminded of who fun ghoul is. the most insane 10 year old cherri has ever met. cherri isnt a brother figure to ghoul. hes just. his friend that happens to be more than twice his age. its whatever lmao

to cherri, ghoul is kinda like a stray animal he keeps seeing. which is hilarious. ghoul actually goes and finds him to introduce him to jet when they start running together, and cherri meets party and kobra (spark and birdie at the time) when he drives the four of them to a party. because he has a truck hell yeah. so now instead of one stray animal he has, like, a feral cat colony that he drives around occasionally. i have no real-life human relationship equivalent to them because irl if some guy that is not related to any of you and isnt even a childhood or family friend and theyre hanging out with you? they are usually not a safe person lmao. but this is my fantasy land and im too stubborn to change anyones birth years even though ghoul being born in 2004 makes everything really hard to make not creepy.

so yeah hes a casual somewhat friend of the fab four. hed probably get more and more concerned as they got famous. the beginnings of any sort of protective feelings, awww :) that sets him up for becoming the girls mentor.

OH FUCK. THE GIRL..... i think if i was in my late 20s and i heard that the gang of 13-17 year olds had adopted a 5 year old kid i would go bananas. what the fuck. it is a LONG while before cherri meets her. but he has the strongest affection for ghoul (if you could even call it that) and ghoul absolutely adores the girl and swings her around under her arms like a cat to show her off to cherri and its very endearing and the girl is sweet and funny so its easy to be around her. and (unfortunately) she is somewhat used to interacting with weird easily agitated people so she kinda gives him space. cherri isnt quite the uncle figure the fandom usually makes him (i luv uncle cherri sm but he simply cannot exist in the universe ive created, f), but hes a little similar.

and then the four had to go and pretend to die. lol.

when the girl was kidnapped, fucking everyone who knew her was ready to storm the city then and there. like regardless of how little you knew her, if you had ever met her you would fucking die for her. she is pure childish charisma and shes precious. i love the girl. so cherris immediately on board with whatever plan the four make to get her back. ive already talked abt how it fucked up the girl tho; there was no way to tell her that the four werent actually dead, she sees the building collapse and she shuts down. and cherri has to fight against his instinct to leave the radio station and never come back when he sees an eight year old girl sitting dissociated on the couch. that fucks everyone up.

i just realized i havent talked about literally anyone else at the radio station. i think cherri started lingering around the station bc it was safe and sheltered while also not being a popular spot. there are less kids there (people pass through but its not a hangout spot). he was kind of just hanging around to get away from the heat and noise and dr d took notice. because that man can see ur soul and no one knows if thats literal or not. so theyd chat a few times a day and show pony was the one 2 get him out of his shell a little and also was the first one he mentioned his poetry hobby to. im making this all up right now as im writing bc i dont know anything about LITERALLY any of the ppl associated w the radio like im not even going 2 try with chimp n newsie i do not have the willpower to tackle all that. justttt. cherri pony n D become bros and live 2gether there.

back 2 the regular timeline. the rescue mission happens in 2019. the girl lives at the station until 2023. during that time she is very much depressed and withdrawn and is only happy when the four come to visit. none of the Adults know how to help her so they just keep her safe and cared for and hope she'll open up to them.

she does not. she takes the weird cat thats been hanging around and she runs away.

cherri does not see her for three years. shes still worse for wear in the mental health department and he can see all kinds of visions of what shes been through since the last time he saw her and he fucking hates the ultra vs bc they remind him of his past. he does not want her going down that path but its obvious that she isnt crazy abt the ultraviolence thing either so thats a relief.

they have a kind of tense relationship throughout the comics. he feels like he failed her and that spirals into feeling like he failed the four for not being a good adult to them and fun ghoul for not helping enough when his commune was bombed and all kinds of shit and that irrational thinking mixed with plain old, yknow, caring about the girl, is what makes him take a bullet (laser. whatever) for her.

i was trying to figure out the timing of each of their ghost experiences, but i want both of them to talk to the witch and im just gonna make it like dreams where a whole buncha stuff happens but irl its been like seconds. so its like barely a second while the girl has her Witch Convo and cherri FINALLY gets a straight answer, yes there is weird shit going on with him having powers. he doesnt have any story-significant past lives because im lazy, hes just an old soul. like really fuckin old. the amount of latent life experience and stuff his soul/energy/whatever has picked up along the way makes him VERY noticeable to gods n stuff. he fuckin lights up all the alarms like what the FUCK is that over there. she wasnt rly able to get to him or even properly notice him while he was a kid and a young adult so shes happy to finally see him again. he has a STRONG sense of familiarity with her. they know each other on a wild ass level that he cant really comprehend.

welp thats some more lore I'll have 2 think abt. anywayz

post canon is when he and val get to have the most awkward spiderman meme moment of realizing that they have the same trauma SOOOOO thatz fun lol /s sorry kings i thought it would be fun to give u something fucked up to bond over <3

not much changes in his personality. he has a better understanding of Weird Magic and delights in freaking out the ultra vs but for the most part he returns to his life at the radio station. i love him

THIS GOT SO CRAZY LONG I DID NOT MEAN 2 GO THROUGH EVERY PART OF HIS LIFE LIKE SOME WEIRD CHARACTER STUDY but here we are. this is basically a first draft like almost all of this is subject to change but u gotta start somewhere. so heres my start i love this guy. its probably obvious but i have not read ANY twitterverse killjoys stuff </3 maybe i will someday idk

[flowerslightning]

The OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) in FF7

This thing actually caught my eyes while reading a few theory about FF7R and the word OCD appear in their certain analysis, in IG, youtube comments and some posts in tumblr too. Dunno why but they always relate Biggs with OCD. I looked back to the scenes where Biggs appear and... Okay, i understand why they thinj Biggs has OCD or perfectionist

A lot of people, including the psych students themselves easily confused with OCD and perfectionist (I got confused by it quite often too). Now, is Biggs OCD or is he just a perfectionist? Let's take a deeper look at it

Biggs is not a famous character. So fans dont really care about him, but I do

Disclaimer : i'm not a psychologist. Im an intern and still studying. Psychiatric is not my major field but i got assigned there as an intern for quite a time and we got exposed a lot about psychology too. We didnt learn them professionally like the real psyche students, we learned (and still under training) through real life experience + a little bit from the books.

So there might be wrong interpretation here and there. Pls correct me if I'm misleading u. And pardon my english. Pls dont use any of these terms to diagnose urself. Remember, I'm a student, not a professional.

I kins of blame the social media for portraying OCD in such a nasty way, when someone with OCD is actually suffering inside.

OCD is not just about 'clean clean, must clean this place till squeaky clean' and OCD is not about being perfectionist. OCD and perfectionist are two different thing.

Perfectionist is more to a demand demeanour, eg "I want the cake to be like this. I want it to be pink. No, not that pink, it must be neon pink with slight purple. Do it again. No, i dont want that pink. Do it again. Ahhh yess, nice pink." Someone with perfectionist, after they got their result, they will immediately bcome calm and satisfied. Perfectionist is obviously different from OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder). OCPD falls under Personality Disorder and it is different from OCD. Im not going to talk about that

Credit goes to crazyheadcomics.

Look at how OCD got spoken from the media perspective. It is very much resemble to Biggs, dont u think? In reality, someone with OCD always feel stress about everything around them, and they will find it hard to complete their task.

OCD has two components - Obsessive and Compulsive

| 1. Obsessive. It is a repeating thoughts about something and often occur until it makes someone feel stress about it. Eg, u think that ur hand will get bacteria infection if u touch a chair, door, fridge or when holding someone's hand. This thought always appear in ur mind everytime u touch the door, chair, fridge or somebody's hand, but when u touch ur shoes, u never think about the bacteria (in certain cases, some patients become scare of everything they touch)

| 2. Compulsive. It is a repeating of the same actions to fulfill the 'obsession' in order to reduce the stress acted upon them. Usually the 'action' has a specific ways in which the patient believe he has to do it like this or that way or else he will fail. Eg, after touching the chair, he will immediately wash his hand 10x from left to right. He believes the hand washing wont be effective if he starts from right to left

Another sign of OCD is when someone re-checking the door lock few times. Its normal for us to re-check once/twice the door lock for confirmation, but for people with OCD, they will re-check the door lock for about 6-10 times and still not feel satisfied and later they stress out. And also the OCD people, they tend to get annoyed when something is not in particular order and they will immediately fix it eventhough they know they're wrong.

I met a funny woman at the hosp arranging our students' books according to its thickness, when I asked her why did she arranged our books like that,

She replied : "Doctor said I have CDO"

Me : "Sorry, CDO? Never heard of it"

She : "It is actually OCD but I feel so stress hearing that term so I put it in alphabetical order. CDO, much better"

We both had a good laugh. Her case was not serious though, but she was feeling miserable with her thoughts and decided to meet a psychiatrist. I would say she was still in early stage for someone with OCD, but may lead to severe if left untreated

It is really hard to satisfy and convince someone with OCD and they always feel stress about something they shouldnt care too much about. U can say OCD is a fastidious type, and they're actually more than that

If we want to relate this condition with Bigg's case., urmm. The only time where I can spot him being different than the other characters is when he's busy sweeping his front house and when he pat Cloud's head during the Sector 7 plate fall.

The cleaning stuff isnt exactly weird thing for a human to do. But it is something odd, I mean, he just finished his mission with Jessie and survived a jump from the plate, and yet he still have the energy to sweep dry leaves, AT NIGHT! He can wait till tomorrow though and should get himself a proper rest.

Wedge says Biggs has a habit of overthinking stuff

And there we see Biggs sweeping the dry leaves. It might be because he is trying to distract himself from doing his bad habit - overthinking. But urm , i think there'll be higher chance for someone to overthink when doing house chore like Biggs is doing. This is where lots of people say Biggs cleaning the house at night is bcause he has OCD or he's a perfectionist.

But I dont think thats the case. For real, he is completely normal. No sign of him acting weird in that scene. If he really does have OCD or he's a perfectionist, we'll see more of him arguing with Barret about unnecessary stuff. He cant become one of Avalanche's strongest member (not exactly strong, but hey, he's trustworthy). Also, if u notice, Biggs have one earring on his right ear. Someone with OCD will feel irritated by it bcause his ear doesnt look 'balance'. OCD people, even in mild case, they want everything about them to be balance and in good order.

After trying to understand Biggs way of thinking and style through his short screentime, I strongly believe this guy has no such thing as OCD or being a perfectionist. Biggs just cares tooooo much about his friends, he thinks 10 times ahead from the bigger picture in which it frightens him about the bad consequences that will occur to people he cherish.

He is the type that always have a back up plan in his mind. He thinks of 5 possible bad things and comes out with 10 solutions. That's the power of an overthinker like Biggs I'll tell ya

Biggs probably cleaning his front house area at night bcause the next early morning, he will need to leave his house for the bombing mission. Better take care of things the night before the big day. He can ditch the cleaning work but he wont do it, not bcause he's a perfectionist/OCD, but try to imagine this, if ur front house is full with dry leaves and rubbish, it will be unpleasant for the neighbours next to ur house to see. Living in the slum means higher chance for u to get sick if u dont take care of ur surrounding hygiene. Biggs is a kind man, and I believe he doesnt want to upset his neighbours

He probably has overthink this matter like "If i dont do this now, I probably dont have time for doing it tomorrow. Maybe I'll broke my leg from the mission and this trash will be left untouched, then there'll be high chance for the children around here to get sick. What if they get infectious disease bcause of this dry leaves? And then the parents will be worried and the Sector 7 Slum will be in chaos etc etc. Time for plan A. Let's clean this place"

Besides, remember the post where I mentioned about Mental Health First Aid? Biggs, as the side character gives the best MFA to Cloud even without knowing what Cloud had gone through. Biggs is just toooo kind with his friends, he cares too much causing him to overthinks about his friends conditions. He can notice even the slightest change in his friend's behaviour and with his own instinct, he cheers for them

Aww man, how can u not love his personality? He's the sweetest side character ever (and kinda hot too).

Soo as the conclusion for my post here, Biggs does not have OCD. He's a side character with a big heart who cares tooooooo deeply about his friends that leads him to overthink too much.

However, if the devs say Biggs really has OCD then my statement about him will be invalid. I'm sure they have put everything in a very close detail look.

Btw, I personally think Biggs kind of portrays the other small side of Cloud, the overthinking part for their romantic partner. But Biggs express his worry through words while Cloud express it through his actions, eg - like how he always keep an eye on Tifa. He never speak it directly like "I'm worry about Tifa, I must help her", he just simply be with her either she needs a help or not. While Biggs clearly says "Jessie been acting weird, I should go if she needs any - help -"

Action speaks louder than words but sometimes our eyes failed to listen.

Alright, that's it. Thanks for being with me till the end.