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coridallasmultipass · 8 months ago

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Personal vent and ugly mental illness symptom talk

So, I should unpack this with my therapist, but shit's embarrassing, so I'm just gonna vent it out on the public internet lmao.

I was typing out a whole thing about how I KNOW I'm aromantic, and despite that, still have moments where my brain gaslights me into believing I'm in fairytale love.

I should preface by saying I have not officially been diagnosed with either additional mental illnesses I believe that I have (B.P//D and AD//HD [which lol being on AD//HD meds since antidepressants didn't do anything has given me some notable improvement, but I'm still without a diagnosis], nor Au//tism) DESPITE repeatedly asking multiple therapists multiple times and a psych like 100 times to give me a definitive yes or a no.

But holy shit. So I'm typing about how I've 'Favourite Person'-ed multiple people at multiple points in my life across all ages, and I'm like, okay, it's been a hot minute since I refreshed my definition of that, I should make sure that's still a thing and not something I just made up or has been dropped from the symptoms or whatever the case. I wanna make sure I'm using it right in this rant about how falling into Favourite Personing people in the past has made me believe 'wait, maybe I'm not aro, this HAS to be like the deepest truest love in existence, despite my years of knowing I'm aro.' Like, I'm so aro I once calculated out the date, months in advance, I was gonna tell someone I was dating that I loved them, only because it seemed like a socially acceptable amount of time to say it. I wasn't thinking about what I actually felt lmao. (And that was probably not a FP relationship, too, so I know that was absolutely an aro incident.)

Anyways, so I'm reading a couple articles to make sure I articulate my points about how it's conflicted with being aro, and I read about how people falling into having a FP will even hate that person for the slightest perceived wrongs. (I knew this, I just was thinking about the love incidents since that's what was related to my point about being aro.)

And holy shit. That just. Unlocked a memory I have about when I was an older kid, like probably 9ish (and older), I HATED my best friend of many years and who would continue being my bff for more years. Who was my everything. I couldn't stop thinking about how much I hated them. I would lie awake at night (insomnia too tho) thinking about how much I hated them and I couldn't understand why I didn't just stop being their friend and start hanging out with old friends more instead. I just couldn't do it, I wanted to hang out with THEM. I was so sick and feeling jealous of them whenever I found out they'd been hanging out with someone else one-on-one and I wasn't invited. Even when it was their own family. One time they brought me a plate of cookies by surprise for (before) a holiday that they'd just made with their cousin or something. And I felt so sick about how I wasn't there for that, it felt like an insult. I couldn't have put this into words, unless I just now read that point in an article and made a connection. It was so confusing, because usually the people who hated their 'best friend' was like, the mean girl kinda character who intentionally does it to hurt the innocent main character or something, but I was the one who felt wronged every time those feelings would come up. And this wasn't just a 'man it's so annoying when they do this specific thing.' This was active stewing, in a slow cooker, all day and all night kinda thing.

I was never romantically or sexually attracted to that person, but I probably wrote all this off as either unrelated sexuality or gender bullshit when I figured that out later. But knowing now that there was definitely someone (actually, I'm thinking of WAY more people as I'm typing this, and just realized why I stopped loving a band and started hating them 'for no reason' wow lmao) that I FP'ed who I definitely WASN'T attracted to, suddenly convinces me that I was probably right in suspecting B.P//D. (Or, y'know, maybe I don't have that specifically, and it's the symptom from a different facet of mental illness or whatever.) I've been so hung up over how I'm aro, sometimes ace, and then this 'only' happens towards people I am attracted to. Like, 'maybe it was love and I'm just terrible at it.' (No! It's not! Aro is correct! That's just the brain manipulating me to get another hit of dopamine off a FP! It's just easier to happen to someone I'm attracted to!)

It's no fucking wonder why I always worried about people hating me in secret, and it's because I was absolutely making myself insufferable because of that worry. I know for a fact that some people definitely did hate (or. Lmao. Shut up. Like, 'resented' maybe fits better) me for demanding constant attention that was never reciprocated by anyone I've ever met in my entire life.

I probably wrote-off so many symptoms as 'I was a moody teen and kind of an asshole.' Except it happened before and after I was a teen, too. I would have excused everything that happened during and before high school, when I should have been looking for these patterns I kept following for years after. It doesn't help that my first relationship was wildly toxic (mostly against me in this one case), and while I didn't feel particularly bothered by it after I got over the nightmare breakup, I just kept going 'What if it was the sole cause of all of this and I'm just repressing that?' Well, phew! No, it's not, that was thankfully just a toxic embarrassment, and not the source of all my problems. I was already on the shitstorm trajectory. That's a major relief. If you can call it that. I really don't like discussing that one, but not in a trauma way, more like a, you don't really wanna discuss pissing your pants on accident kinda way. Unpleasant to remember, wildly embarrassing to talk about, but ultimately not a life-altering event.

Ughhhhh. Maybe I should bring this (the mental illness not the relationship) up to the therapist. But like, I haven't been close friends with anyone in like 6 years or so, so I don't have any current or even recent examples about how being in friendships has always turned out Russian Roulette for me. My therapist doesn't seem to believe how bad it was for me to be in friendships where I was unintentionally FP'ing someone. Because besides the depression and anxiety (and mild OCD), I'm a totally normal person to her who's just dealing with shit health problems and grief (and frustration from being trans and not in a safe place to transition). Y'know, normal life problems most people will feel at some point, just chronic in my case. I may be weird, but I'm obviously far from the worst she's seen. I'm not uniquely mentally ill.

((Except the whole 'treatment resistant depression' diagnosis bullshit from the psych, but I'm learning it's not just mental issues I have that are treatment resistant lol.))

I tried talking to her about a small part of all this before, but IDK what I did wrong, she took it 100% as me being the one unintentionally wronged and not setting MY own boundaries (lmao), so like I don't know how to word this in a way she'd understand that most of my problems in this area were my own fault. (I mean that both negatively and neutrally, because it's an ugly side of mental illness, but not one I chose or know how to help.)

Not being in close friendships with anyone has had an understandably sane-ifying effect on me (barring the, y'know, depression/anxiety/OCD and baseline weirdness), which has gotten me trapped for the 5th time in 6 years of making my therapists believe I'm better off than I actually am. (I've done this to every therapist I've ever had before that, too.) But like, again, at least for the past 3 therapists and the latest psych, I AM actually better for not having close friends lmao. Only one therapist ever had one visit of me wanting to address these concerns specifically while they were currently active, and by the next visit, we had to shift exclusively to sudden new grief lol. (What a shitshow. It somehow always ends up that whenever I wanna treat an illness, it's like opening a can of worms, except the worms are firecrackers and I didn't set the can down and step back a few feet.)

Like, it obviously feels safer to not have close friends at all because there's no fear of abandonment if I have no one to begin with. And, genuinely, I operate better when I'm alone. But now that I've known safety, it's hard to imagine throwing myself back into the roulette wheel, hoping I don't land on red OR black. But fuck, man. It is lonely.

And being aro? It's freeing, and validating too, to have a word for it, but I'm not gonna mince words here, I hate it. I wish I could feel romantic love. Like normal, not mentally ill ""love."" I feel platonic love all the time, like for friends (not FP) always. I love saying 'I love you' to friends and meaning it. But I want to feel romantic love. I just don't. I just feel friendship, Favoriting, and/or sexual attraction sometimes. Probably why I'm so into shipping and fanfics. I got a lot more "probably why's" but I don't wanna go down that in this already vulnerable post lol. (I already made a whole post about one of the why's back in like 2013 or 14 lmao, without connecting it to this.)

Anyway, I put this whole mental illness and relationships deal into ugly imagery in a current fic WIP I'm working on, since recognizing I was aro took living through FP'ing a few 'romantic' relationships, before I even first heard the term FP. I only saw my experiences as 'I don't think I've been experiencing love' and that by itself felt like it fit. I didn't realize there was anything wrong, even as I outwardly said shit like 'I don't think I'm fit for being in a relationship' to the few people who asked me out, even when I wanted to say yes.

And then I kept trying to make relationships work lmao. I don't know why I even bothered. I just wanted to be wrong about being aro, especially when it was a point of contention (aro and ace separately) with some of the relationships.

I'd probably have to meet another aro person of the exact same flavour of aromanticism to make it work, but even then the mental illness would just be a ticking time bomb. No one wants to be the recipient of FP 'affection', except maybe sometimes the fictional people in a certain fiction trope that winds up being fetishistic, even if it's not intended to insult real people (but sometimes it is). And it's just a reminder of how I was probably a big source of toxicity for probably half the people who have ever been close with me, if it's even half of how fiction portrays people with this symptom.

I dunno where I wanted to end this vent, so here's probably a good place. Just wanted to get this off my chest, because it just now felt like a pretty big revelation that my problems weren't related to romanticism, I've had purely platonic instances of this dating back to being an older kid, and more during high school, and I just never connected the two before now.

#dont read if u think im cool #id rather stay cool lol #long post #delete later / /#(in case i change my mind or wanna edit)#Cori.exe #Post.exe #man i talk a lot #shouldve spent this time writing fics instead but i rly needed to talk (type) this out since i dont wanna bring it up in therapy again yet #anyway lmao there we go #rly excited for the fic tho. besides the stuff i mentioned i also took this popular trope and #wait #why am i spoiling it im not gonna convince anyone who read this post lol youll just have to wait for the hot platonic smmmmmut #and hilarious storytelling by one char #and then (still a wip) round 2 #bc no fic is complete until theres a round 2. imo.#((yes i know i have a different round 2 thats over a month late past when i was gonna post it lol i havent forgotten))#here we go writing an essay in the tags now too lmao #ok i need a break for my eyes and then im gonna try to write the platonic one more #hhhh anxious tht my reputation will tank from posting this. idk how i or my 2 followers will survive th consequent backlash and cancellation #(joke)#(still anxious tho)#(i have diagnosed chronic anxiety lol)#eager to know what id be cancelled from tho. maybe my puppetfuckinglicense gets revoked.#maybe my shrimp get taken into protective custody #shrustody #sorry i dont mean to make light of legit cancellations im just trying to convince myself its okay to post on my own blog #good fucking luck catching all those shrimp tho i dont even know how many i have. they control their own population at this point.#they probably have their own system of... shrovernment #Prime Shrimpister Isosceles rules with an iron swimerette i wouldnt wanna interfere with that sovereign nation

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welcometogrouchland · 8 months ago

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mm. Fear

#ramblings of a lunatic #got pointed towards a freelance job opportunity by a friend (thanks bestie ily 🤟) and hit up the asker w an email abt further discussion #since the og email was kind of vague (its a comic project! idk abt what but it is one! idk when/if there's a deadline! but it's a comic!)#and that meetings been arranged and thats all peachy keen #and if i get the job i get it and if i don't i dont #(they liked my samples despite them being old work so i definitely have that part down- now it's just seeing if the schedules align)#but as i was sitting down writing important questions I'd need to ask when we meet i was hit with a wave of. fear #and guilt?#like. It's been so long since I've made a Proper Comic (w/ the correct formatting and attention to layout and composition n stuff)#that I'm scared I'll like. forget how to comic and fuck it up. and disappoint this stranger I don't know #...and myself but that's besides the point #idk i think it's just jitters (also bc i had a bad ipad drawing day the device was NOT agreeing with me. paper was ok tho)#and I don't even have the job yet 😭 idk why I'm so nervous #maybe bc I've never had a paid illustration gig and i feel like such a fraud bc I'm a solid 6/10 self taught artist #i feel like rob liefeld bamboozling marvel into hiring him in the 90s and then Rob Liefeld-ing all over the place #(I don't think he actually bamboozled anyone. that's just how I feel rn)#in conclusion i think being on my period has not helped my feelings of mild trepidation and has in fact made me think dark thoughts #so I'm going to try and claim some semblance of rest now

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mistyechoes · 1 year ago

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im just as bad as before aren't i. but worse

#this is like a poem i think my life is like a poem #i mean im literally hearing music and laughter from another room as people ignore me going through mine #without asking but that is. besides the point #idk. wish time didnt have to move like that #everything sucks rn but im also okay i feel more stable than i have been since september #what a good song this is. maybe the listening is a good moment too i think the expectations of smiling is wearing me down #its nice to not smile even when i am somewhat content #oh the song changed i. dont like this one. hm #and thats like a poem too huh #everything must come to an end and all #yeah. sorry i. spacy today its kinda nice #havent felt the freedom to be spacy in a while #apparently i get rambly when this happens my bad

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skythealmighty · 4 months ago

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man. there are so many object shows out there. I NEED TO CATCH UP ON SO MANY why are the4e so many anyway Exclamation Mark (NOT AB) im killing you. he would get bullied off tumblr

#rocket talk #roc save #NOT THE ANIMATIC BATTLE ONE that ones fine #i mean the one in my header #hes an asshole #why do i keep accidentally hitting the number keys lately

(7 notes)

📉 storyboard-but-better Follow

i cant believe my contestants are so pissy over the second challenge still!!!! it was a coherent challenge i think "survive me killing you" is pretty straightforward!!! besides theyre fine now >:/

⏰ timeisatool Follow

Maybe it's becausw you killed them?

📉 storyboard-but-better Follow

well thats stupid

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

I KNOW RIGHT!! my old contestants got SO pissy when i killed th3m!! just because theres no recovery... 😒

⏰ timeisatool Follow

You dont have recovery????

⭐ everybody-smile-smile-smile Follow

arent u supposed to be dead

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

well im NOT so

❗ black-and-red Follow

Ugh, I haven't even killed anyone that much and they're still pissy! Honestly... just do the challenges and you'll be fine! I only threatened them..

⭐ everybody-smile-smile-smile Follow

well i thought i killed circle but ig not! and square but nobody else died idk why everuones so afraid of me... whats so wrong w wanting to make a perfect object show?

⏰ timeisatool Follow

🔥 betterheatsflamesman Follow

yeah theres nothing wrong with that! you gotta do what you gotta do for your object show

⏰ timeisatool Follow

😰😰😰😰😰

⏰ timeisatool Follow

I want to leave this group...

#i thought we were all just supposed to be wacky and weird 😰😰 #mom come pick me up im scared...

(34 notes)

🔥🔃 betterheatsflamesman Follow reblogged 🪔 slay-style-queen

🪔 slay-style-queen Follow

Hey guys, just managed to get sponsored with my object show idea!!! (No thanks to you Lip Stick lol) wish me luck!! Also go keep an eye out on Village of Objects Official :D

🪔 slay-style-queen Follow

what the FUCK

🪔 slay-style-queen Follow

oh my god how do you all stay sane actually

4️⃣ four-therecord Follow

we don't! welcome to the club

🪔 slay-style-queen Follow

im never doing this again

#:)

(4,294 notes)

📻 annie-annie-ooh Follow

Who's Animatic?

#It's Your Fridge DJ! #I appreciate all the lovemail and the concern! ❤ #I don't understand some of the asks but thank you anyway!

(725 notes)

🧪🔃 test-tubular Follow reblogged 💥 fans-fantastic-features

🫵 have-you-heard-of-this-os Follow

Have YOU heard of:

🫵 have-you-heard-of-this-os Follow

Please stop debating on whether or not this "counts" as an object show, this was requested by an anon. If you want to do that on your own time on your own blog, feel free!

💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow

SORRY ABOUT THAT SJEHSKEB will move i promise 🙏

anyWAY on another note i miss this showww 😭 i was so intrigued about it but i guess i understand its cancellation... if anyone wants to come up with a rewrite w me hmu my ao3 is in my desc!!!!

⭐ everybody-smile-smile-smile Follow

just as long as you clarify its unofficial!! (:

💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow

its on ao3 ofc its unofficial

💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow

WAIT A GODDAMN SECON

#Fan we were /on/ an object show and technically famous I'm not sure why you're surprised at this point #Also get off your phone we're at Purgatory Mansion

(11,374 notes)

anonymous asked: hey greeny can you say trans rights for everyone out there

🟢 greenyguy Follow

trans rights AND trans wrongs. even if you like burger king i still support you <3

#burger king sucks ass tho dont do that to urself

(34,193 notes)

💥 fans-fantastic-features asked: im SO sorry for the sudden reply earlier, up until your post i thought hfjone was just some weird wild experimental show?? then again i shouldnt be surprised if happy star themselves is on this goddamn site (also sorry in advance for my friend TT sending you asks about alternate universes. shes a science nerd of all types and needs data or sm) if you want i can tell you what i know about your situation in a private chat, ive done a lot of deep dive analysis posts on my blog too and trust me when i say a LOT of the internet wants to help free you and everyone else you have plenty of help available spotty replies tho im investigating smth

🎒 liam-plecak Follow

I... yeah, I'd like that. Thanks.

(34 notes)

anonymous asked: battery ui is kind of already jailed but still

🔒 your-fav-would-be-jailed Follow

Battery from Ultimate Insanity would be jailed!

🔋 theft-and-battery Follow

Yeah

#Why did someone earlier send in that Walkie Talkie person? #I approve of the Blender submission though #Hate that guy

(12 notes)

🎒🔃 liam-plecak Follow reblogged 💥 fans-fantastic-features

🕹 fire-cartoon-schtick Follow

cant have shit in this fuckass hotel 😒😒😒 lens just died 😔😔

🕹 fire-cartoon-schtick Follow

#WHAT THE FUCK #DONT JUST DROP SMTH LIKE THAT AND DIP #ARE YOU OKAY?? #ARE YOU TALKING ABT A GAME???

hi! rhanks for the concern! 😁 i am unfortunately not talking about a game lens is actually dead please help me (dms r open 🙏🙏)

#Since I've gotten a lot of followers recently I feel like I should boost this #I'm busy with my own issues but maybe someone else can help?

(5,204 notes)

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

i want my SHOW BACK i want my CO HOSTS BACK i want calculatory DEAD i only MILDLY HATE happy star i dont KNOW WHAT ELSE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT

🥝 gela-not-jelly Follow

🫵 Fanny kinnie

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

who the FUCK is fanny

#im CIRCLE not a goddamn FAN #who even names themselves fanny anyway

(382 notes)

⚪battleforcircle asked: oml spiderman pointing meme

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

you sent me this FIFTEEN TIMES get OUT of my ASKBOX!!!!

📉 storyboard-but-better Follow

why are there two of you...

⚪ fuckingcircles Follow

theres only ONE of me i dont know who this IS!!

⚪battleforcircle Follow

theres three of us just three of us

#idk why either tbh #tumblr just recommended his acc to me one day #he seems fun to annoy tho so ive taken it upon myself to do so #tee hee

(89 notes)

📶 she-walkie-on-my-talkie-till Follow

Hey so why is a known criminal on Tumblr?

📶 she-walkie-on-my-talkie-till Follow

Hello???

#rocket talk #roc save #unreality #fake dashboard #osc #object shows #object show community #animatic battle #itft #obsolete battle show #hsgtos #surreal salvation #village of objects #bfdi #brawling on planetary scales #inanimate insanity #ultimate insanity #greenyguy

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sukunasweetheart · 2 years ago

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sukuna is that one boy in class that will do anything to annoy u bc he doesnt know any other way of showing his affection

he loves to see you jumping up and down as he holds something above your head, a nasty smirk showing on his face

aims to get you eliminated first in any game played during p.e (yeah, no mercy for those legs of yours when its dodgeball)

or if you end up in the same team as him he’d use you as a shield for any incoming attacks from the opposite team (even tho we all know this bitch can dodge like a pro)

its so cute how he gets himself eliminated on purpose afterwards tho, so he can sit beside you and annoy you more.

messes up your hair whenever hes walking past... so now you have a habit of instinctively covering your head with your hands whenever hes walking by and it makes him and uraume chuckle...

would be the first to howl with laughter, clutching at his stomach, whenever you make a fool of yourself. you tried to kick a soccer ball, but missed the ball entirely and your shoe went flying instead. and then you had to chase after him bc he snatched it up and went running 💀

if youre a jumpy person, he’d take any chance to scare the living lights out of you. he loves seeing you get all freaked out, screeching (100% chases you around holding a roach)

but sukuna makes it very clear that he is the only one thats allowed to toss you around like this, he would kick the next person that tried to the same

if anyone else told you that hes usually stoic and moody you go 🤨 bc this man is so lively around you

sukuna is so BORED when youre not around, it drives him insane

he’d probably mellow out more as he gets closer to you but still, the teasing is relentless as always

if there is a day where he’s upset you fr bc, idk you were already in a bad mood or something, he would most likely not know how to cheer you up... maybe he’d leave u a drink from the vending machine on ur desk. what’s your go-to drink? strawberry or chocolate milk? pocari sweat? apple or orange juice? (hes around you often, so he prolly knows what you get the most from the machine)

you know that this is the closest thing to an apology that you can get from him so you accept it anyway

at some point, sukuna will assume that you’re already aware of his feelings for you. he gives you so much attention, surely you know by now, right? wrong. youre absolutely clueless, and when he brings it up one day, you just sit there like, what??

“are you playing dumb, or are you fuckin’ stupid?”

you get all defensive and the two of you start bickering.

“enough of that. well, now you know,” he nonchalantly tells you.

youre so confused bc youve never thought of him in that way and you tell him that youll have a think about it... to which he clicks his tongue in annoyance and says “fine”

he keeps pestering you for an answer after that! you keep running away from him. (its like youre triggering his hunting instincts, making him chase you around)

his usual teasing ensues but something feels different... you feel more flustered and your heart races more than it used to... (he notices it all)

when you eventually give him an answer and say “i like you too...” he will respond with “yeah, i thought so.”

watch out bc sukuna is the type to move things fast. blink once and you might already be married to him.

Masterlist

#sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna fluff #sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader

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hauntedrain · 11 months ago

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Part 1: Unexpected | Max Verstappen x Fem Reader |

mixed Social media AU summary: Max stumbles upon a twitch streamer who peaks his interest

✮▹A/N: Love you guys and thank you for 1,000 notes on my last post but also 100 followers! love you guys

✰▹Warnings/Notices: Used random names for readers friends, also i really didnt know how to format this tbh so might be a bit weird and make no sense. NOT EDITED.

Part 2: Here!

liked by 25,456 others

@Y/N: Stream was lovely today, sorry for missing the last stream. love you guys and see you on the weekend! ALSO new video out on YouTube with Theo and Lorelei.

Y/N has posted a youtube video!

YouTube transcript!

Y/N: Its actually really pretty out today, I expected it to be a little more gloomy. But its rather sunny out.

Lorelei: Why are you talking like that?

Y/N: What do you mean? Just because you still talk like a 5 year old doesn't mean I have to stay on your level.

Lorelei: Anyways...

Theo: Did you hear that they're planning an f1 race here?

Y/N: F1? Like the vroom vroom thing you like?

Lorelei: PLEASE the vroom vroom thing.

Y/N: I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS!

Theo: Yes the vroom vroom thing. Anyways yea they're planning it.

Lorelei: What team do you like?

Theo: McLaren. you?

Lorelei: Maybe Redbull or Ferrari.

Y/N: Preferably I like the one thats winning. so...

Theo: Redbull.

Y/N: got it.

Y/N: I wanted to buy this coat from down the street from my apartment but it was like $150. At that time I really thought about where and if I should find a rich man to marry.

Lorelei: F1 drivers are rich.

Theo: Like rich rich, mainly the popular and good ones but thats besides the point.

Y/N: As much as you guys try im not gonna get into F1. And also why is this video just you guys insulting me over not knowing anything.

Theo: We just think you'll like it.

Y/N: Cars going in a circle for 2 hours? Would rather watch football

Lorelei: But you like football.

Y/N: Yeah thats my point?

Max Verstappen has gone live!

Max Verstappen has ended the stream!

Liked by Max verstappen & 32,345 others

@Y/N: Why are people tagging me in F1 stuff? And whos Max verstappen? HELP.

user8: LMFAO MAX IN THE LIKES. THIS POOR GIRL.

user9: I think you should do a reaction video or stream to everything.

↪ user10: she would need Theo and Lorelei for help.

user11: MAX CAN TELL YOU.

↪ Y/N: WHO TF IS MAX?

↪ Lorelei: Babe please come to my room. I'll explain everything.

↪ user12: MAKE A VIDEO OUT OF IT PLEASE OR STREAM IT.

↪ Y/N: Will do?

Y/N has gone Live!

titled: HELP ME.

⭒❃.✮:▹A/N: Guys im deeply sorry if this makes no sense and everything is confusing. IDK what im doing. but love you guys and I hope you enjoyed.

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zeropro · 2 months ago

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What are your thoughts on transformers prime and transformers one?

TL:DR I liked both! TFP was my first Transformers show that I watched all the way through and TF1 was a lot of fun! Opinions on Starscream under the break pfpfpfpfpfpf

Prime was literally my first Transformers experience (Okay that's not true, I did see the first Bay movie when it came out but lets not talk about that). It's really good! My favorite character was Ratchet, I loved that he's just a tired, grumpy, racist old man and he's a doctor. Knock Out was the best thing to come out of TFP and he really should be in more stuff. Really would have loved a fourth season but it wouldn't have been the same without the children around. I liked what we got!

Prime has an excellent Starscream, Steve Blume does an amazing performance with both his deep conniving gravel and his high pitched terrified sputtering. So much character in his animation too, especially in later seasons, and an incredibly compelling character arc. Prime Starscream is not a good person, but I would burn the world for him, and I like the small moments in the show that hint at something in his character that could be turned to good, but circumstance always works against him in that regard. He's just so pathetic, but also competent and dangerous, all the best qualities of a Starscream and a very unique design!

Transformers One was quite good, I was worried because of the trailers but I was surprised by how well executed it all was. None of the characters were annoying, and making Optimus Prime originally one of the oppressed class alongside Megatron was a good move. The scene where Orion gives Dee the sticker is so cute, I simply cannot. The ending felt a bit rushed but what can you do, it wasnt so bad that it's a problem for me.

I would have loved just a little more Starscream in the movie! Like, I knew he wasn't really gonna be in the movie much so i was prepared for it to be little more than a glorified cameo, but I loved a lot of what we did get and I feel like it was missing just a little bit more! Like, the whole High Guard turned rogue backstory he has is great, implies some honor to his character since he didnt keep serving Sentinal when the guy turned Cybertron over to the Quintissance. I think it's hilarious that Starscream is so much older than Megatron. Like, they gave us a lot of food to make headcanons out of, but then the rushed ending kind of left me with no real reason given for him and the rest of the High Guard to go with Megatron without a fight. Like, I think the reason given was that, because Megatron beat him up that one time, and then killed Sentinal, and since the High Guard became a might makes right society and hates Sentinal, I guess thats why they are loyal to him now. And I guess the one line where Starscream is like "all hail megatron" is supposed to indicate he's 100% behind Megatron now and not just a spur of the moment thing. And I guess them following his command to destroy the city is why theyre being banished. But like...idk, every other plot point was well established and properly played out, and the whole decepticons thing just didnt really feel like enough, and i kind of feel like it should have been more clearly communicated considering its an entire one side of a two sided war? I feel like we werent shown the high guard doing anything egregiously bad besides attacking people because megatron told them to.

Like, there's nothing in the movie to suggest that Starscream and the High Guard arent still loyal to the Primes. So when Orion comes back as a prime, like a proper prime, with the matrix and everything, which everyone knows will make the energon flow again, I'm surprised Starscream didnt at least try to make excuses or worm his way into avoiding banishment? My headcanon is he wanted to kill Sentinal as bad as Megatron and so when Megatron finally does what he failed to do for 50 cycles, he's like aite im ride or die for this guy. Maybe 50 cycles of living in the wilderness doing nothing but scout and pit fight all day changes a guy and they dont wanna live in a society anymore. Why dont they accept Optimus as the new prime? They helped him and Elita save their friends, and unlike Sentinal Optimus has the actual Matrix this time. Idk mang. Woulda liked a bit more.

Transformers One, not my favorite design for Starscream. The head vents going wide at the bottom look weird to me, and his legs are so long and flat.

Thems my opinions!

#transformers #yes i mainly just have opinions on starscream

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