#but thats a different post for another time

[scartale-an-undertale-au]

So... I see this a decade after i decided to simply... Stop instigating conversations because i felt like im simply burdening others with my presence and that they actually felt annoyed having to hear from me and wished i wouldnt send messages.

The thing is that none of them ever approached me afterwards. When we saw each other after a while we would be ecstatic but there was a wall between us already and i dont know if its simply life going on and us being very different than back then, or that they truly didnt see me the same as i saw them (as my besties).

One time i met one of them (this one specifically was my best friend from first grade until twelve basically) on the street and i see that she's married and walking with her husband. Turns out the wedding was that sunday and i wasnt even notified of it happening or of the engagement. I wasnt mad about not being invited, but i was hurt for not even being notified! She then turned to her husband and said that im a friend of her from high school.

Its been a decade from high school so i can see why she said that, but that hurt me so badly that the moment i waved them goodbye and they disappeared around a corner, i collapsed and just sobbed. I was so heartbroken. It seemed that i was the only one who still thought of her as my old school's bestie or had thought of including her in any future milestones simply because she was so important to me.

So i dont know how i feel about this post. I understand where you guys are coming from and its in good intentions, but the main issue is that many kids who become the sole instigators were never shown that they can be vulnerable in front of their friends about this matter. It felt like its your duty and how you contribute to the group. And when it became harder and harder, the friends never questioned why you pulled away or asked for your wellbeing. It turned into a situation when you feel more like a nuisance than a leader.

Fortunately, i have now friends who instigate so much more than me and i keep telling them how i appreciate it and apologise for how terrible i am at texting back and that its never because i dont want them to text me. Its simply because texting or answering messages had become so hard for me and so mentally taxing i sometimes shut down when i see messages i need to reply to.

So rambling aside, as much as i appreciate your sentiment, i think a different approach would be helpful.

My approach (which is not better or worse, just a different approach) is to get comfortable with a 'friends for one day' reality. I go so many times to so many places and meet so many amazing people, we always say we'll contact one another and keep in touch and then never contact one another again, and that's alright.

You have to be comfortable with being friends without focusing on the 'keeping the friendship going' let people come and go. Those who truly want to stick around will stick around, and they usually have a much deeper connection with you that isnt dependant on who instigates the conversations.

My friends are those that mostly text in memes and reels since we dont see each other often. And i do the same in return. Its easier and relays so much more. We have proper conversations here and there, but our actual interactions happen physically. And they instigate meetups much more than i do and i always make sure that they know that i appreciate it. One of my friends and i also have some differences in opinions, so we have some long discussions.

I also have a friend who i dont text to at all but invites me to shabbat meals once in a while and i come over and its like no time had passed. I invite her back for bbq or shabbat as well, but thats also once in a blue moon.

Another friend is across the ocean so its mostly photos and small comments and talks about our lives and since the war began, she keeps checking if im alive and well.

Another friend is also across the ocean and we mostly speak about our realities of being jews or squeal over her precious daughter or make plans for when she finally comes to Israel.

So my friends arent part of one group but many branches of different aspects of my life. I would say i have around seven/eight of them that arent my current co workers (work friendship is also temporary and i accept that fully and enjoy our time together) and im truly blessed because i had let go of the desperate need to keep my friends together.

So please dont call us a bitch for not willing to talk about it. And we're certainly not mini community leaders, we're just people who are friends with those that never cared about reaching out first or affirming our friendship in any kind of way. Its not fair to put the expectations of reaching out onto the one who constantly did that. Friends who truly want to keep up a friendship will attempt to do so when they see that the other side isnt as present as previously.

Sorry im all over the place, im on my phone and its harder to articulate on it

every now and then the internet decides it should revamp the ole “stop texting first and see how many friends you lose” when in reality you could literally just communicate that u feel bad that ur the only one texting first

[zephyr-ro-emenki]

Random Batfam Headcanon's #23: The Adoption Habit Trilogy!

(continuation of #22)

Another thing the Batfam has a habit of adopting (but this time collectively) is mother figures.

Of course, we have Thalia, who is Damian's birth mother (and the one Jason refers to when he speaks of Mom), and the rest of the Batfam have a precedent to call Thalia Mom in that her and Bruce were once in fact married, and the only reason they split up and never had a happy married life being that Ra's ordered her to tell Bruce she had a miscarriage with Damian and return home with him. So, the rest of the family can (and in life and death situations where they need to stun her, Have) called her mom.

Then there's Selina, Bruce's on again, off again love interest that he was also engaged to. She's the one most Batfam members seeing when they picture Bruce actually settling down with someone, and she's truly become either their mother or their spinster Aunt who has a lot of useful (but criminal) habits that your parents don't want you to know (and the difference depends entirely on the writer for that comic run.)

Now, we get into the Various Female Heroes (and newspaper journalist) that get referred to as Aunt but they all mentally call them Mom.

We have Lois Lane (the Batkids have a running betting pool for when either Bruce or Damian Realizes they've unintentionally started dating the Kent Family. Tim doesn't count, he knows for a fact he's blatantly dating Kon. And so, The Kents have become referred to internally by the Batkids as the In-Laws.)

We have Wonder Woman (the full equalizer to the Throuple that is Bruce, Lois, and Clark, truly making it a Polycule. She also just radiates mom energy.)

We have Zatanna (this is mostly just a joke from Steph being Horny/stupid on main and accidentally posting the words "Magic Mommy" in the Batfam chat when referring to Zatanna's show coming to Gotham. It's stuck around longer than they ever thought it would.)

We have Dinah (she's the family therapist for not just the Batfam, but also the therapist of the entire JL, of course she radiates Mom energy.)

We have Leslie Thompkins (she's the Batfam's go to doctor, they've all been high on painkillers and accidentally referred to her as Mom before.)

And thats it if you don't count some Batfam members jokingly and sarcastically referring to Harley and Pamela as "Mom" in that very mid-Teens sarcasm that everyone gets, and Harley becoming a hyperactive parent like "OMG IVY WE HAVE KIDS!!!" and Pamela having to calm her down with "Harley, Darling, love of my life, centerpiece of my garden, they're little menaces." Only for Harley to respond "I know, aren't they PERFECT!?!?!?!"

[cryptidjeepers]

Im not going to say specifics but theres so much 'through the grape vine' discourse on the internet that is so frustrating for a lot of reasons. But the most frustrating kind is the "baseless or otherwise unnuanced/overdramatic accusation of someone or something" that is either debunked, old and outdated or proven to be a much more complicated topic. But all most people will see is that first callout post and will internalize it as fact for years. Theyll continue to parrot it on other platforms whenever its mentioned and then outsiders will see that out of context and internalize that as well. Until its so far from the context and the damage is irreversible.

Or will take what might have been a understandable criticism but will turn it into a "this thing is irredeemablely bad and youre a bad person for liking it." If you so much as mention the thing you will have people saying "isnt this thing evil and bad?" Because of a tumblr post they read 5 years ago.

[ghostorbz]

Wooo

Also a zadr version hello

THESE WERE SCHOOL DOODLES HEHE

I just made em digital

[starry-bi-sky]

more clone^2 memes because i think they're funny

[s0fter-sin]

god the way ghost’s voice drops when he tells soap, “you’ll need to improvise to survive”

before that, everything he says is steady but when he acknowledges that soap’ll have to do something outside his skill set, something he intimately knows to be difficult, his voice wavers. he does the same when he says, “welcome to guerrilla warfare”; it’s sombre and serious in a way he doesn’t act for the rest of the mission. if you read into it enough, he almost sounds apologetic; like he knows exactly what soap’s about to go through and wishes he didn’t have to

he keeps soap going; poking at him and making jokes, giving him tips and asking about his progress. he never lets him stop and take a second to think bc he knows the moment he does is the moment it'll all hit him; the betrayal, the pain, the fear, the deaths, all of it will drown him and if that happens, soap won't make it

he needs him to be a soldier through and through and he knows this is one of the worst kinds of battlefields you could end up on

and the only times he slips is when he acknowledges that fact

it happens again when he says, "tryin' to get you here alive and in one piece". his jovial dark humour facade drops for just a moment when he has to face the potential reality of losing soap. then he tries to pick it back up again with, "one of us has to survive to tell the tale"; completely discounting himself as a survivor to try and rally soap and make him think it’s all down to him

and soap does the same thing

when he's calling out for ghost on the radio, he's tentative, testing the frequency, then when he doesn’t get a response, he grows desperate; "ghost, this is 7-1, do you copy?"

then when ghost answers, he smooths out his voice; he hides the pain, the fear, and no matter what response you give to ghost asking if he’s injured, soap brushes it off (“i’m good”, “what’s the difference?”, “i’m not a medic”). soap decides it’s in ghost’s best interest to hide the extent of his injuries

he doesn’t know where ghost is, if he’s secure, if he has any weapons; he doesn’t even know if he’s in las almas until he says, “there’s a church, i’m headed to it”. for all he knows, he could’ve run in the complete opposite direction. if ghost knows he’s hurt, then his attention would be split between his own survival and soap’s

and soap, who lets himself be poked and prodded towards the church, needs to hide his own doubts. maybe he needs ghost to believe he'll make it so he himself can believe it ("what are my odds?" "don't make me bet against you", "think i'll live that long?" "probably not")

he all but begs ghost to tell him he'll get through it and if he knows just how bad off he is, maybe he'll change his mind. maybe he'll think he won't make it to the church

maybe he'll leave him alone for good

"you injured?"

"i’m good"

"let's find out how good you are"

[horrorknife]

babe, this wouldn't be the first time it will not be the last time there's no parasol that could shelter this weather

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man

[al-luviec]

something simple to try to get out of art block (it didn't work)

[forbiddentaako]

more monochrome practice I suppose

[sentientstump]

old and new (it might've turned old as well two days ago) low res pictures

oh, forgive me, hylics and hylickers

[lighthouseas]

begging people to understand that "mike is not being abused by ted and karen" and "ted and karen are not good parents towards mike and this is something that we are supposed to take notice of throughout the show" are two statements that can and should coexist

[dexaroth]

category 9 serial wheeker incident 💢

(experimental attack for @moodycarcass)

[suffarustuffaru]

ok now that i caught up on a few asks (ill be back later!!) i got an awful awful omegaverse detail to share. i really like the omegaverse au rezero takes on here, yall have such interesting ideas. but okay i got one—

otto should be an alpha.

OKAY now hear me out for a second. i 1000% agree that otto being a beta makes absolute perfect sense. even though his personality is kinda loud sometimes, hes usually just kinda There. you know? hes always in the support role and he usually doesnt draw attention to himself. always stuck in the background and in the shadows 👍 he also wants a nice comfortable life. hes wanted to fit in throughout childhood. he takes care not to make others hate him (unless hes being impulsive/reckless). etc etc.

he knows that he fits the beta role to a T. thats why if he was anything BUT a beta, he’d be pretending to BE a beta.

this is because otto being an alpha exacerbates all the issues he develops by the time you get to arc 8. because otto is THE worst person to be an alpha. he doesnt fit the stereotype and the usual alpha at all. hes not very powerful. hes easy to make fun of and humiliate. hes not very dominant either. he tries to say all sorts of stuff in arc 8 and assert his place there and more than half the time he gets shrugged off because hes being dumb and no ones gonna do some of the shit he says. hes got a gazillion different complexes now about being useless and about being Secondary and he gets desperate so hes like “well i can walk in darkness though. im useful!! i swear!! this is what i can do!! everyone else is wrong!!”

so of course otto would pretend hes not an alpha because he is The complete opposite of what the “perfect” alpha should be. as hes growing up he would be like judged for that sort of thing, you know? and then he’d decide its more convenient to go on blockers or whatever and pretend to be a beta because betas are Normal. betas dont get noticed that much. not much is expected of you besides being the Support, right? depending on how you wanna interpret omegaverse politics wkdnd. and ottos like oh yeah. i wanna be seen as normal. and if i cant be a good alpha, if i cant be what an alpha should be, im gonna be a good alpha via playing the support role!! and theyll all know im dependable and useful and theyll need me and i can revel in the fact that they dont know im an alpha!! but im outplaying them!! i got them to need me!! my tactics have made ME the secret alpha controlling everything!! this is perfect!! im a good alpha!! i came out on top still!!! this is great!!

and then arc 8 comes along and it ruins everything and otto is back to being the absolute worst alpha of all time that everyone thinks is a beta anyway because hes 1. made this a self-fulfilling prophecy and 2. literally no one is gonna look at him and think “oh hes alpha material” after all this time. and after all his arc 8 shittery.

yeah so anyway then otto explodes with rage because his stupid alpha ass is like oughhhh ohhhhh ouhhhh my god im not in control anymore im not dependable anymore im not a good support anymore!!!!! no one takes me seriously!!!!! ill show them!!! ill show them all!!

also he probably thought of subaru as. as his omega. and subaru wouldnt even know because after all my good buddy pal otto is a beta 👍

[zeldassecretwell]

listen. listen. hear me out.

trans zelda and trans link (of course), HOWEVER (long speculation and gender worldbuilding/headcanon follows):

link, afab and genderfluid. as a child, shrimply does not Care about gender. does not cross her mind (homeschooled and fucks around in the woods too much for it to be relevant to his life). But when they pull the sword, suddenly there's all this attention on them and guess what? The Hero Of Legend is a boy, and so Link must be a boy, always. He doesn't really mind at first, because it isn't like he cared anyways, but it eventually becomes stifling as he realizes that he, as The Hero, is expected to perform a certain kind of masculinity (and only ever perform that kind of masculinity).

zelda, amab and trans, she/her. grows up as aware of gender roles as a child can be (given that those roles are tied to the monarchical power structure that she's born into). Sees that her mother is 1) the one with the divine heritage and 2) I'm going to assume favorite parent since I dislike Rhoam intensely. Is like, yeah sure I'd like to be a girl, sounds neat! Rhoam et al. are like but your roles...no...be a boy... And then her mom dies when she's like 6 and everybody's like well shit The Princess Of Legend is a girl, and Zelda is an only child, so now we will choose to see you as a girl. And at first Zelda doesn't mind because she thought being a girl was neat anyways, but then it becomes stifling as she realizes that she, as The Princess, is expected to perform a certain kind of femininity (and only ever perform that kind of femininity).

I just think it's incredibly interesting how gender can play into the themes of destiny/expectations/personhood/choice/self discovery if you operate off of the assumption that the botw/totk universe has an (even slightly) different system of gender. because most societies do in one way or another. FOR EXAMPLE:

- link starts dressing more fluidly and expressing themself more after he wakes up post amnesia, moving away from rigid, stoic masculinity of pre-calamity

- zelda cuts her hair post botw. she cuts her hair. oh my fucking god! she cuts her goddamn hair! she is louder and more outspoken, and she leans into being a scientist. and she cut her hair!!! because she IS a girl, but not the one that her father wanted her to be.

- and on the topic of how this influences the rhoam-zelda dynamic: you could read an element of rhoam projecting onto zelda (and zelda very much perceiving this) "well, if only you had been 'BORN' a girl, maybe your powers would work sooner" or "well you wanted to be a girl, so why do you complain about the kind of girl that you must be for the good of the kingdom (read: the kind of girl I want you to be)"

- THUS. INTENSE ZELDA LINK BONDING (romantic or platonic doesn't matter) VIS A VIS BEING TRANS AND THE WAY EXPECTATIONS SHAPED THE WAY THEY WERE PERCIEVED AND THE WAY THEY PERCIEVE THEMSELVES. CAN I GET AN AMEN.

- also, last little note - because I'm assuming (as much as one can) that the kingdom of central Hyrule is to some degree imperialistic and subjugating other regions in the country pre-calamity - other societies in hyrule could have gender systems that differ from that of Central Hyrule (and this is sort of present in canon but. you know. in the way that canon is the way it is. well.). ERGO. none of the Champions have to be in line with the central hyrulean concept of a cisgender person. I rest my case.

[pumpkster]

Do you mind explaining how you make your art style.

I pride on imitation but I can't seem to crack how you make art like yours.

HELLO no problem (using this as an excuse to not forget my process too 😭)

for my style you just have to know how to use diff layer modes (for colouring) but also how to put this option

for lineart details (^ it makes you colour inside of the flats from the layer below) IM EXPLAINING HORRIBLY

i dont know if you were asking for the colouring or everything in general? but okay lets take giovanni as a lab rat

LETSGO so what i recommend is a lot of defining

so you first are going to have something like this , no details just focus on the pose

NOW TO THE SECOND SKETCH you should do the head and body in different layers bc sometimes u might mess up in proportions and its easier like this

^(on the first sketch the face is all over the place and not accurate so what helps me is check the forehead size for guidance of where to start the eyebrows and eyes )

see u got a head shape BUT ITS MESSY so time to do the body

awesome

now you make it fit

this looks creepy but sometimes its good to make these as a guide of where the limits of their eyes (+position of their eyebrows) are (also helps for the distance between the nose and eyes)

i prefer their eyes dont touch the corners/sides of their heads idk if that makes sense

SOO IT TAKES SHAPE just get them surgery anytime you see something that looks bad / or that could look better

LIKE THIS WHOLE SECTION

this man and his weird shoulderpads whatever . theres always stuff to modify , here by example i personally dont like the head size so

wooo giovanni exists

let me know if you wanted the colouring process or a character in specific 👍