#but that they're also unusual in ways
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i really like that tiki in engage gets to use every different kind of breath. really cute mystery secret shop reference. she can even use the darkstone this time!
#mystery's tiki is absolutely my favorite#the best thing about FE dragons is that they look like Dragons (capitalized)#but that they're also unusual in ways#the new divine and fell dragon species are great examples of this#bug and snake
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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They would be besties and talk about anomalies together, prove me wrong.
#also they're both monsterfuckers#like#come on#edwin had a thing for the cat king#and i don't think i need to explain about the whole thing bill and ford had going on#ford would probably ask edwin a bunch of questions about him and charles faced#and about their cases#and Edwin would be all like: YOU MADE A DEAL WITH BILL CIPHER???#because there ain't not way edwin doesn't know about bill's existence. maybe he's in some of their books in the dbd office#two autistic gay men hanging out. nothing unusual#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#charles rowland#cat king#paynland#catwin#gravity falls#stanford pines#grunkle ford#bill cipher#billford#toxic billford#ford would probably teach edwin about ddnmd and edwin would have the time of his life with it
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"[Elizabeth Woodville's] piety as queen seems to have been broadly conventional for a fifteenth-century royal, encompassing pilgrimages, membership of various fraternities, a particular devotion to her name saint, notable generosity to the Carthusians, and the foundation of a chantry at Westminster after her son was born there. ['On other occasions she supported planned religious foundations in London, […] made generous gifts to Eton College, and petitioned the pope to extend the circumstances in which indulgences could be acquired by observing the feast of the Visitation']. One possible indicator of a more personal, and more sophisticated, thread in her piety is a book of Hours of the Guardian Angel which Sutton and Visser-Fuchs have argued was commissioned for her, very possibly at her request."
-J.L. Laynesmith, "Elizabeth Woodville: The Knight's Widow", Later Plantagenet and Wars of the Roses Consorts: Power, Influence, Dynasty
#historicwomendaily#elizabeth woodville#my post#friendly reminder that there's nothing indicating that Elizabeth was exceptionally pious or that her piety was 'beyond purely conventional'#(something first claimed by Anne Crawford who simultaneously claimed that Elizabeth was 'grasping and totally lacking in scruple' so...)#EW's piety as queen may have stood out compared to former 15th century predecessors and definitely stood out compared to her husband#but her actions in themselves were not especially novel or 'beyond normal' and by themselves don't indicate unusual piety on her part#As Laynesmith's more recent research observes they seem to have been 'broadly conventional'#A conclusion arrived at Derek Neal as well who also points out that in general queens and elite noblewomen simply had wider means#of 'visible material expression of [their] personal devotion' - and also emphasizes how we should look at their wider circumstances#to understand their actions (eg: the death of Elizabeth's son George in 1479 as a motivating factor)#It's nice that we know a bit about Elizabeth's more personal piety - for eg she seems to have developed an attachment to Westminster Abbey#It's possible her (outward) piety increased across her queenship - she undertook most of her religious projects in later years#But again - none of them indicate the *level* of her piety (ie: they don't indicate that she was beyond conventionally pious)#By 1475 it seems that contemporaries identified Cecily Neville as the most personally devout from the Yorkist family#(though Elizabeth and even Cecily's sons were far greater patrons)#I think people also assume this because of her retirement to Westminster post 1485#which doesn't work because 1) we don't actually know when she retired? as Laynesmith says there is no actual evidence for the traditional#date of 12 February 1487#2) she had very secular reasons for retiring (grief over the death of her children? her lack of dower lands or estates which most other#widows had? her options were very limited; choosing to reside in the abbey is not particularly surprising. it's a massive and unneeded jump#to claim that it was motivated solely by piety (especially because it wasn't a complete 'retirement' in the way people assume it was)#I think historians have a habit of using her piety as a GOTCHA!' point against her vilification - which is a flawed and stupid argument#Elizabeth could be the most pious individual in the world and still be the pantomime villain Ricardians/Yorkists claim she was#They're not mutually exclusive; this line of thinking is useless#I think this also stems from the fact that we simply know very little about Elizabeth as an individual (ie: her hobbies/interests)#certainly far less than we do for other prominent women Margaret of Anjou; Elizabeth of York;; Cecily Neville or Margaret Beaufort#and I think rather than emphasizing that gap of knowledge her historians merely try to fill it up with 'she was pious!'#which is ... an incredibly lackluster take. I think it's better to just acknowledge that we don't know much about this historical figure#ie: I do wish that her piety and patronage was emphasized more yes. but it shouldn't flip too far to the other side either.
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I can't really explain it but I get the feeling Yves and Riddle would get along swimmingly
#also azul and clavis?#the whole domestic faction with Hearstlabyul students#Yves is like a little mix of both Vil's fashion sense and Riddle's well almost everything else#maybe Nokto and Cater would make an unusual friendship? they're similar in some ways if you know what i mean#I think Kalim is like the complete antithesis to depressed Licht like both are sunshine but one wasn't lucky#Gilbert and Lilia :)#Luke and Silver#Jin and trey? just normal guys who likes sweets right :)#ok i cant really explain this one but Ruggie and Sariel... maybe because of Sariel and Clavis' friendship?
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Flames,, blanket boy, my beloved
I gotta draw more art like this of him, he's such an odd creature I love him so much
There's so much to his character that I never talk about aaa I'll make a lore post eventually
#i have thoughts about this guy#he's so hungry for affection and that social and physical contact he see's all the people in his city get#he's takes up so much after them in so many ways#maintenance on this guy... mechanics working on checking all the wires and circuits and touching all the sensitive nerves and neuron flies#its nice that his entire structure is well taken care of but he also wouldnt be able to focus on anything else#he's so used to working in perfect undisturbed conitions..must be so distracting when something changes#he'd have his overseers watching as they plug things in and test stuff and poke around in his guts#and maybe he'll enjoy it a too much and he'll beep when a cable is pushed in.. its not like the sounds are unusual#the structure is alway whirling and buzzing.. whats a few extra clicks and hums when a particularly sensitive component is touched#its not like they would know unless they were really paying attention to the sounds and looking for a reaction#trying to please their beloved supercomputer#he longs for the same love they're capable of but it does quite work out. They can't hug him in a way that feels the same#does affection mean anything to him when its so little. They cant love him in a way that properly means something#i guess flames eventually getting into a relationship fills that affection hole#someone who speaks the same language. someone who he can relate to and understand#someone capable of touching all his systems in just the right way#ajfjsj went off i the tags here uh im so tired im kinda losing consciousness as i was typing oops#rain world#iterator#rain world oc#iterator oc#oc four blue flames#drawins#suggestive
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2024 Art Purge (Part 1)
Original Edition again! Another year of too many doodles between original and fanart that didn’t make the full cut over the course of the year - off we go!
I made some concept art for smol early in the year of a mushroom girl she had a dream about a while ago that she wanted to try making as a low-poly model sometime. Pretty sure we've narrowed it down to the original DS-era style of 3D models
And so some angular low-poly style doodles were also called for! She's so tiny haha
Around the same time I was thinking about ZEX's “Kissing Strangers” meme, I started considering what Charm's reaction to that one might be - I'm always trying to think of animation memes for her, I'd love to animate her sometime ♥ In the end, it was all a bit too weird! In a way it’s fitting, as the meme is all about Looking and not finding the one you want to kiss til the very end lol, but who would that even be! Who would Charm Want to kiss, I don't know...
[Purple Text] only got a very little bit of screentime this year, but they're just as weird and possessive as ever - once, forever and always, at least according to how they see things
Smol and I tried out a few different creative games over the course of the year - my favourite probably being the Crossover Wheel where we each put in our list of fandoms, including ones we share, and then imagine what a crossover would be like haha. House Hunted is one of hers, and she tossed the idea my way of looking at Zillow Listings (specifically this group) and imagining them as Realtors! I got the Sunflower House - you'll know it when you see it haha
Bit of a random one, but I thought the sheep from this little scene was hecka cute and needed to study her. Good shapes! Very adorable! I like her covered eyes quite a lot, and her spindly little legs, funny to me hehe
I also wanted to study her "Leg of Lamb" posing - can you tell this is memory vs. references lol. S'why references are so important! The original's delicate posing is very lovely! The soft positioning of her knees and ankles and the way she's fully reaching across herself with those fluffy "sleeves" are probably my favourite parts, it's a good pose!
Haven't done any Halfway Autumn concept art in a while-while, so why not come back with Diana's bathroom lol. Still a bit of work to be done, moving the door is probably the biggest point - having the leftmost wall lined with counter space is clearly the correct play here. I really like the shapes that naturally occur from isometric, like the way the shower curtain rod connects to "nothing" but it still reads as stopping at the wall! :D
All of this floorplanning just for some flavourtext about Diana's preferred style of hand soap haha. Foaming soap dispensers are the best! Makes everything much much clearer, definitely not just because I prefer it, it's totally objective! Haha
More bathroom flavourtext, either at the schoolhouse or the train station, or both! Since so much of the game is centered around Diana's needs, little things like what soap she uses actually impact the game! I wish something so simple wouldn't affect my day, but sensory needs are called needs for a reason :P
Started a Charm comic that unfortunately only got as far as the first panel haha - she's taking a class! Off to improve her skills at something in a group environment! Good for her :)
Or not, the sads are here :'0
Did a bit of Tsumtsum studying while drawing the Helix boys as such haha - I have one of those little Vocaloid not-Tsumtsums (they're only Tsumtsums if they're Disney, right?), and one full-sized Iron Man one that I studied the approximate shapes of the pattern from, they don't Look complex and they're probably not Actually that hard to make but there's still a good bit to them! 3D shapes, I swear
The 4th Wall group! Their poses and expressions changed a bit from start to finish, Cory once again looking at Bar - I don't think he's actually "seen" Bar's new design before this point! :0 They're all generally aware of each other but "actually interacting" is a whole other thing haha
The two stragglers, made Tala way too tiny here haha. And forgot her bow here, no wonder I forgot it for the full version too! Pfbtl, next time :P
A traditional version of the Just Desserts map! :D Made after putting the digital version together, just kind of loosely studied, general shapes good for mapmaking :) I quite enjoy the little mountain texture here over the one from the digital version! S'hard to make nice-looking shapes without my tablet but I really didn't want to use it Just for that haha, so nice shapes here! Gives me DQIX map vibes, just a little bit... All those little islands to sail to haha
Snake, snake, snaaake, it's a snaaaake ♪ Made for smol's Christmas exchange ostensibly, but really more of a spacefiller and to get into the swing of drawing snakes, the cute lads
Ball python in the style of a ball of yarn! I wouldn't mind wrapping up a plush snake, but the way real ball pythons curl up into a ball is too cute haha
Here was the Actual snake I ended up making for smol - as a bookmark! I printed a few different versions, coloured one like this with extra-dark spots for the scales, and glued on a ribbon-tongue, cut down the middle for a forked look! :D She liked it, and I like it! Double victory :)
A little sticker concept while my laptop was out for attempted repairs - can't save 'em all I suppose. I do like that the head mirror is a disc, the stethoscope is a mouse, cute little details even for an unfortunate set of circumstances
#Doodles#Original#Long post#I love when these are polite and don't break <3#This being the smallest of the three may have been a contributing factor there lol#Expect only more! But for now! Enjoy what is here! Haha#So much for 2024 being the year of little saved back lol I'd argue it just keeps increasing year by year#Stuff I want to show off! Where to put them is the question every time#All these not-quite-finisheds or one-offs or small groupings or concept sketches that would spoil the final version - where to put them all!#Right here and right now haha#As usual there are some I want to return to! The Kissing Strangers meme would be weird but that also part of what makes it interesting#Specifically to do with a sona makes it more complicated feelings tho!#Maybe I can have her kiss the other sonas lol I'm obviously not above self-love♪ lol#Technically there are some fandom-adjacent things here - even a study! That's explicitly not original! But I thought it fit better here#Original Enough™ haha#Fewer eyes in this particular set but just you wait - it's a mainstay it's the only way to be haha#It's also an odd one to have the purge coming out Now - not just the timing lol but because that means after they're done that'll be it!#It'll all be 2025 art once the third set is out! :0 That's so unusual to have the purge and cast the year completely aside!#I'm not sure how I feel about it yet :0 But I'm glad to have had a little extra time to work on stuff while the end of the year was in chaos#Too much going on! Best to take things as they come :) Prepwork is all well and good but sometimes just going with the flow is good too!#So I'm happy with it ♪
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monitoring by deco*27 could be a soldierspy song if you just give me 12 hours and 5 cans of monster to explain
#not rb#I need to stop saying this type of shit#already feeling like that one “sponge plus star equals clam” spongebob gif#“guys I think apple is orange” *never elaborates* *leaves*#okay but listen. LISTEN‚#pov character (of the mv) is a paranoid freak projecting a mix of fear (of judgement) and desire onto the singer.#said singer ultimately just wants them to be okay but might be unusually persistent/devoted in said endeavour (up to interpretation??)#“lean on me with your whole weight” thinks of their dynamic in emblue where soldier constantly sacrifices for spy for practically no reason#(other than his commitment to the system)#is that how spy sees him? a willing‚ almost eager pawn?#“call my name‚ and anytime I’ll come hither” do you get it. Do You Understa#also just. The theme of perceived inseparability#“I'll always be by your side” are words the pov character is putting in the singer's mouth#(well. the entire song is. but you get it)#(actually on a meta level this song works best when sung by vsynth/vocaloid bc of both the fictitious nature of the singer and the fact tha#that *all* vocaloid songs are technically putting words into the mouth of an interpretation of said singer. if that makes any sense)#sorry that's off topic anyways my point being#the pov character is both put off and endeared by whom they perceive to be a weirdo watching them#this is the closest they have to a support system. this is the only person they really have batting for them#they are also unwilling to really open up to this interpretation of the singer because it's easier to imagine that they already know#that the pov character won't have to go through the trouble of exposing themselves. that the singer understands in the way they need to#and is blindly‚ unquestioningly loyal Anyway#remind you (me) of anyone#this is how I justify listening to this fucking song on repeat for the past 72 hours#this is also how I spread my “soldier should lovingly maul spy because they're both freaks” agenda#ty for coming to my ted talk. I had to save this in my drafts first to make sure I didn't hit the tag limit 💀
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thinking about saavik again orz
#p#i know some of the older comics give her a betrothal that sarek & amanda set up shortly after she was rescued#but i think iterations of the same backstory where she didn't would make sense and add to her having Not The Best Time on vulcan#like in a society that values these traditions as a stabilizing force/means of maintaining a family's status#it would not be especially advantageous to attach your son to a girl who 1. was actually feral like a year ago 2. has tenuous family ties#3. is of mixed heritage (half of which is an active enemy to your govt) and 4. embodies an incident most vulcans would rather forget#like whoever would agree to the arrangement would have to either be Legit about idic and unusually less susceptible to unconscious bias#(so like. platonic ideal of a fandom-reception Good Vulcan)#or someone who owed sarek a big favor#and even if she was betrothed without blackmail and the family was lovely and not xenophobic to her... that's just them!#tpp at least explicitly mentions people treating her like an interloper throughout her time on vulcan#i think her gravitating towards starfleet is primarily because of spock (initially at least) but lowkey the situation she's in#would make it more appealing as a place THEORETICALLY accepting of cultural difference in the same way it would be to like. ferengi women#for that ^ reason and just going off of flashback i think is she and tuvok met while he was on the excelsior they would butt heads a bit#also he's inflexible and listing regulations in it exactly like she was what.. 7-8 years earlier? and they're about the same age#are vulcans capable of feeling cringe#saavik
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she's so her....,....,,,..,...
#Once again thinking about my crush/squish despite my best judgement#houargh#why must she be so sweet and lovely and wonderful..........#Like. I *know* it's not gonna work out if I try to be as close with her as I want#because there are certain ways in which we're incompatible#But also. She...#Ough#Clara does things that are not drawing#Clara does things that are yearning#(platonically and/or romantically)#My grey-aromantic grey-aplatonic ass has a hard time telling the difference sometimes#since they're not kinds of attraction I experience super often :^/#Physical attraction? Enix penix lemon Squenix. Any sort of emotional attraction? Pattern recognition lacks sufficient data#She IS pretty as well but I'm confident that's not a driving force behind my fondness for her#Which is unusual for me
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Reclining on a fainting couch, hands laced together and resting over my stomach as I stare up at the ceiling. Why the fuck do I so frequently end up caught between being attracted to mean guys (and gals) but also the wife material guys? Duality of man is falling for both all the time, apparently, and never knowing which I actually genuinely like better.
I wrote out a whole theory about why I like mean people before I realised the logic no longer applied to my current circumstances/character and now I'm back at square one. Perhaps the real answer is as lame as: because I like a challenge and the idea that someone treats me Extra Special compared to how they treat others.
At the end of the day, idk.
#reflecting on characters like jin kamurai primarily#cause like. why HIM girl lol#don't get me wrong he also gets on my nerves#I Do Not like getting bossed around (much) (okay well maybe it depends)#I hate waiting on someone's hand and foot 24/7 but actually I don't mind being an errand boy (gender neutrally)#there's a difference trust me#but there needs to be some kind of reward involved#thankless stuff will just have my eye twitching#maybe apply that logic to how I like specific kinds of mean guys#the reward for pursuing them despite on the surface getting no return since they're mean and uninterested#can range from getting a flustered/unusual reaction out of them to actually finding a tiny thing to grasp onto and be delusional about#in the end the reward is hard-earned dopamine#again idk I'm just rambling and thinking aloud#the Extra Special part is pathetically real though#spent a lot of time yearning for a best friend until I found some#and a selfish part of me wants to be special in other ways to someone too#you know???#I think now we're circling back to an element of my og theory I drafted where this is all linked to childhood#how typical#in a more humorous sense there's a way I can apply all this to the way I enjoy videogames but that might be an essay for another day#while we also examine themes of self-inflicted suffering and again challenges
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okay, cool. i think i figured out something. i really didn't care about the new Puss in Boots movie. almost the whole time i was like "so?"
even when the wolf guy showed up i was just like "who's this bitch?" (that got answered later but yeah i didn't care much about him for a while)
i just watched the first episode of Legend of Vox Machina and had the same blank reaction to it.
it's pretty much ALL "who're these bitches?"
it was especially flat that the main group, after a quarrel, asked, "why are we even together?" and i was thinking, yeah, okay, why ARE you together? but then that never got answered
so now i know why exposition is important and why just jumping into stuff doesn't always work lol.
(i do think the first episode would have been slightly better if the bar quarrel were cut altogether and it introduced them in front of the king instead. that's literally an introduction, and an interesting and fun one, with them a mess as the song plays. plus, it doesn't include the seemingly out of place, unanswered, "why are we even together")
#lovm#tlovm#puss in boots#writing#still sticking with it for at least two more episodes. the writing at the start of any show can be rough.#i'm just recording this because i'm like 'okay cool. possibly figured out one thing.'#ep's also weird 'cause the group's interactions seem to ping pong between 'they've known each other for a while' and#'they're not used to each other' in a seemingly contradictory way. i get you want to have a sense for what's unusual but#it could be done better.#review
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i think a lot abt biker and jacket's relationship for someone who does not like them together romantically
#and talk abt them a lot for that matter fgdfgfgd#idk!! i just think that there's like. possibilities there y'kno#like there's a reason why i made a playlist for them. bc if you know me then you know me making ship playlists and like#actually sharing them. is a little unusual. bc i have others that aren't hlm related#but this is the first time i've felt strongly abt them (the playlists) enough to actually share#which makes sense for beardjacket and jacketgf since i post abt them a lot#but for biker&jacket (esp consdiering that it's a ship playlist /meant/ to not be romantic) it's like. god idk how to say it properly#like there's tragedy there. if u kno what i mean. just inherently#like there's a reason that of all my jacketshipping playlists the biker&jacket one has the most amount of songs w no words (5/10 of them)#bc to me their relationship isn't built on affection/any sort of real attraction. it's built on understanding.#on needing this person in your life even if it isn't good for either of you because not having them there would just make things even worse#bc the beardjacket playlist also has a genrous amount of songs w no words (4/10) but i have specific reasons for having them there#the main general ones being /comfort/. and longing. bc that's what those songs meant to me personally#w the biker&jacket one i have straight breakcore songs on there (bc to me biker/jacket means breakcore) and a 25 minute ambient/vpw track#as well as release by M|O|O|N and it's ok you're ok by bonjr bc to me all of those songs are like#like regardless of how i personally feel about them they're not meant to be. satisfying? ig?? like they're meant to be unsettling in a way#i'm essentially trying to encapsulate how games like hlm and firewatch make me feel#like. like this is how it's supposed to be. even if it's not what anyone wanted#anyways. i need to keep studying.#the trash speaks
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tagged by @blackberrywars to do wip wednesday! does anyone else remember when I said I was aiming for posting a wip weekly? yeah me neither
since I haven’t been writing lately this one is from maybe a month ago, just a tiny snippet that’s (as usual) much bigger in my mind. may or may not write up the whole thing, so I put some additional context / plans in the tags!
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A simple request. No... not a request. An order. Two words. Quiet at the onset but growing steadily in Izzy's mind, blooming and spilling over to cover every corner.
The whisper of a smile at the corner of Ed's eyes meeting the desperation swimming within them. The soft pair of footsteps padding from above deck to below contrasting the heavy pounding of Izzy's heart echoing in his head, the intensity threatening to shake apart the blossoms that had so recently taken residency.
All of it sharp yet muted, loud yet far away.
#ofmd wip#blackhands#izzy hands#edward teach#wip wednesday#thanks for the tag!#okay time to provide some context. in preparation for that: i have NO idea why this phrase kicked off a whole Thing but at the time I was#very much feeling that intense !! need to write this down feeling#in my mind this is post s1e10 when babygirl is in his kraken era. peak destructive blackhands with basically izzy giving ed whatever he#needs to get through this (for them to both get through this) which has been translating to violence pain rage etc.#they're no longer conversational and haven't been for weeks. ed is a shell of himself who is somehow both hollow and filled with raw power#untamed emotional turmoil letting itself out in unhealthy ways (we love to see it)#izzy knows to make himself available when needed but only when needed. nothing between them is light anymore#the vibe is very much ed commanding and izzy obliging. but it's draining. it's so draining on both of them#one day ed just doesn't have the energy for it anymore (and it's about fucking time because izzy has learned to make himself flexible when#it comes to ed who's rigid and unyielding but even izzy can only take so much bending before he breaks)#I think he just wakes up one morning and is done with the whole thing. he's miserable and he's over it and he wants (needs) a change#so then this piece of the wip is the start of the change. ed goes up on deck one morning - early which is unusual for him these days - and#goes up to izzy. holds his gaze (yes this is the bit of a smile and also the swimming desperation part) and gives his next order: 'shave me'#it's long overdue at this point tbh. anyway the shaving scene itself would be absolutely intimate just so so emotionally charged#strangely close and gentle and *tender* even after all those months of nothing but sharp teeth and searing pain#also izzy is for sure straddling ed's hips and leaning over him to shave (ed's order) and being so focused and careful about it in that#izzy-acts-of-service-hands way. i don't know yet if they have some kind of soft spoken conversation#if tears are involved or if they just remain in silence but comfortable silence#i don't think it's a huge turnaround of everything is okay now but I do think it's the beginning of change#okay sorry lots of tags as usual but that's probably enough#who knows if the rest of it will be officially written but that's where this was headed#how's this for a writing tag#+ tags!
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the most recognized as comedic song being the best part of the movie musical because the conventions that serve as a mode of communicating ideas, for example "people just bursting into song" or "choreography" or "'noticeably stylized' cinematography" that accentuates nonliteral nonrealism-invoking choices, are regarded as Silly or Frivolous. and the effort to shove everything else that's more "serious" into what is expected to be read as dramatic cinema that's not stylized in any ways that seem too "Genre" which only makes [but someone's singing?] underwhelming and out of place because no other elements are supporting it
#that plenty of Thee Establishment most concerned w/the commercial angle of musical theatre is also like ''musicals? is silly''#or rather is forever defensive about this. all the musicals you know tonys will be comfortable with b/c they're gently ''edgily'' Serious..#that old deh interview where p&p are like ''haha eugh we're not writing MUSICAL numbers musical numbers X'D this is serious this is real''#deh as a living room play....like don't get me wrong. all Critiques / dunks on deh the stage musical even deh the movie...are not the same#all mine are better and wiser. but actually really for example like ''ben platt old?? he hair a joke??'' are criticisms i reject lol#wait a second does anyone in the Stage Musical ever do any more dancey choreography than they do in sincerely me....probably not#remembering the great times of that jared goldsmith interview where they were telling him to walk less dancily in ywbf lmao#taking some chassés across the stage....finally looked up if ''sashay'' is just a misheard + phonetic ''chassé'' & yes#anyways and just connect this all to the broader issue of Any ''genre(tm)'' understood as like. Unserious. style that is so unartistic....#insert joe iconis talking about it. basically that if some Noticed ''unusual'' style usage is taken seriously it's presumed ''self aware''#such that it may be like; parody of; commentary on; homage to whatever Conventions....#like is a movie too associated with women as creators or audiences? some style choices that might seem to have some odd effect or w/e is#then just like wow guess this isn't good enough to be an experience i can completely intellectually disengage with as viewer....#whereas if it's Not ''''gendered'''' so associated enough w/men as creators & audience (not much room for ''&/or'' there) then like#oh that perhaps somewhat awkward noticeable Style Usage? that was innovative; fresh; if it's funny it's ''clever'' rather than comedic#Don't Even Get Me Started on comedy also being an unserious ''easy'' too-Genre(tm) lesser style / way to communicate ideas#but i'm already started! it's right in the premise! ppl not even noting Sincerely Me has any material About anything b/c like#well it's Just Funny. jared & alana are Easy parts b/c they're so often Funny & set apart from the Serious Drama of parental angst#i actually haven't seen that many movie musicals but the ones unembarrased about themselves are superior#plus the idea of Worthy funny/noticeably styleized things as being Distinguishingly ''Self Aware''....the idea of Being Funny as either#being Unselfawarely the butt of the joke; or awarely deliberately Clever as what makes one superior to others; laughing At them surely#and i'm right back as well to what i was musing on re: the limits of billions' own language and in turn the limit of ideas if it cannot eve#express otherwise / beyond....that worthiness is awarded with this Dignity backed by the elements of the medium as tv's discretion#versus if someone's undeserving & unserious; or usually deserving/serious but is messing up & we want you to notice; then#they Will be beset with some humiliation; probably at least more proximate to being Laughed At; material may go out of its way to do this#another thing is that billions seems to have so little to no room for anyone having a capacity to be Silly#people Being Funny On Purpose is largely making references or pwning another character; both establishing competitive Worthiness#another shift from 5x08 onward like. rian truly able to humor herself is gone with her desk clutter#the fate of winston's =] ness is found in 6x01 when both quants are being funny until rian's funniness goes [abuse coworker] mode#that illustration that Hierarchy generates a Joke; at someone's expense. characters (& the writing?) Can't do otherwise to him or fathom it
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Caught a worldbuilding bug - finally have a story that's been percolating forever starting to gel, and after about 15k words of outlining I am finally doing some character design. Here we have my little race of humanoids - good with magic, small, and surprisingly sturdy.
And here's the first pass on the aggro race of big-boys. I'm pretty happy with them right now, but gotta design the rest of them.
There is absolutely nothing to be inferred from this.
#ocs#world building#character design#elves#monster#size difference#noooo you def shouldn't read anything into the humanoid race being tiny#and the fact that they're unusually sturdy also is nothing to note#they're def not that way for any particular reason#shut up
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