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jingabitch · 4 years ago

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Adhesion ch.1

SUMMARY: As a new stylist for Blackpink, you need to focus on doing your job well. If only your assigned idol weren’t so distracting.

PAIRING: dom!Jennie x sub!reader

GENRE: slow burn smut, idol AU

WARNINGS: D/s relationship dynamics and negotiation, sexual tension, smut in later chapters

WORD COUNT: 7.3k

A/N: major thanks to @mingyuistall for helping me go over this!

series index

You swore under your breath as you struggled with the giant tote bag over your shoulder and the little suitcase you were rolling behind you. Being the new assistant stylist meant paying your dues and being put through your paces, and you understood that when you took the job, but this really sucked. This morning, you’d had to pick up all the clothes for the shoot from the various fashion houses and find your own way to the studio with all your things in tow.

Oh, and you had to get there earlier than everyone else, which was why you were carrying everything up the subway stairs before the sun had even risen.

It was all worth it, though, you reminded yourself as you almost rolled your suitcase over your foot, because you were working with Blackpink today, and it was going to kickstart your career in fashion.

Besides, you thought, trying to stay optimistic, at least since they were A-list celebrities you weren’t getting to the fashion houses and finding out that they’d already decided to loan out the pieces to someone else, which you’d definitely heard your less fortunate classmates complaining about.

Oh, and there might be the little issue of your giant celebrity crush on Jennie, but you were determined to stay professional anyway. This was your first time meeting the girls after the head stylist had deemed you ready for actual styling, and you needed to make a good impression.

Once the security let you into the building – and okay, you did enjoy the thrill of getting past security – you started setting up, laying all the makeup out and hanging up the clothes. The other assistants came in while you were doing that and started helping, and by the time the head stylist Jiyoon entered the prep area, everything was ready.

She barely looked at you as she tossed her handbag on the loveseat. You held back a cringe – that was a lambskin Chanel classic flap, infamously delicate and worth thousands of dollars. Then again, she’d probably gotten it for free and had dozens of others just like it. “Unnie, good morning,” you greeted, and it was only then that she turned to nod at you.

You shared a nervous glance with your fellow assistant stylists. Each of you was assigned to one member – although Jiyoon conceptualized everything, it was rare that she actually helped them get ready, and was mostly there just to supervise. She also had a temper that was known throughout the industry, but was one of the biggest names out there, so everyone wanted to work with her anyway. Honestly, you were lucky to have gotten this job.

When the girls filed in, still looking kind of sleepy and rumpled, you had to remind yourself again that you were a professional, and squealing and asking for autographs was not part of the job scope. Unlike Jiyoon, they zeroed in on you immediately, looking curious, and you almost squeaked nervously as you felt the full weight of their attention.

“Good morning,” you said, before clearing your throat. “I’m L/n Y/n, the new assistant stylist.” You bowed deeply, your hands folded in front of you politely.

As nervous as you’d been, it appeared that the members didn’t have the same concerns, since they just started getting ready. You looked over at the other assistant stylists, but they were already discussing outfits with their designated members, so you approached Jennie slightly hesitantly.

“Um, unnie, I have two possible options for you,” you started, biting your lip. As nervous as you were at the beginning, once you started discussing the looks and makeup, you were in the zone, and it all melted away. You didn’t even fully realize how easily it was coming to you as you compared the two outfits, pulling out a bunch of accessories from the giant box and letting her look at the completed styles.

Jennie, however, noticed the dichotomy between your earlier attitude and the way you were talking to her now, and it intrigued her. You were cute too, and she would have thought so even if you hadn’t made such an impression, but damn. It made her wonder what you were like normally. Were you shy and quiet, or were you passionate?

She was still watching you when she sat down in the chair for you to do her makeup. Again, there was that second of nervousness as you chewed your lip and your eyes flickered over her face, but then you turned to the table where all the products were laid out the way you liked, and it faded away again, almost like it had never been.

While you worked on her makeup, Jennie watched you. It may sound strange that you didn’t notice her intense gaze since you were working on her face, but you were so focused on what you were doing that it wasn’t until you were drawing back to look at your finished product that you realized, and instantly, you’d turned back into a sputtering mess, almost dropping the eyeliner from your suddenly nerveless fingers.

When you turned away to fuss over the makeup, Jennie let her lips curve up in a smirk. Her new stylist was ever so cute, and she couldn’t wait to see just how good you’d be for her.

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To Jennie’s amusement and your horror, you didn’t grow out of the awkwardness. In fact, the more time you spent around her, the worse it became, until just a glance from her turned you into a bumbling mess. The only saving grace was that it didn’t much affect your work. It was almost like you were in a different headspace while dressing Jennie and getting her ready for her various photo shoots and performances, but once you were done…

God.

You couldn’t help it – it was like Jennie had cast a spell on you. As hard as you tried to deny it, your celebrity crush was getting worse, and you were the butt of much good-natured teasing from the other assistant stylists. She was just so pretty and charismatic, and having her full attention on you – all right, even her glancing in your direction – was enough to make your cheeks heat.

There was no way Jennie didn’t know of the effect she had on you, when you could barely stop yourself from stammering in her presence, but she was nice enough to not comment on it, so there was that.

Tonight, you were tasked with returning the clothes the girls had worn for their shoot, so when everyone had left, you packed everything up and headed for the subway station.

“Oh look, isn’t that Y/n?” Lisa, who was sitting next to the window looking out on the sidewalk, jabbed her finger against the glass.

Jennie, who was sitting on the other side, immediately unfastened her seat belt and got out of her seat to look, crushing Lisa against the side of the car in the process.

As Lisa squawked in indignation, Chaeyoung and Jisoo snickered. “You certainly aren’t interested in your stylist, Jennie-yah,” Jisoo said mockingly from the back.

“Yeah, unnie, this is a totally normal reaction for anyone to have,” Chaeyoung chimed in.

Sulking, Jennie returned to her seat. “I’m not interested in her,” she protested. “I just think it’s cute how nervous she gets around me.”

Lisa muttered something under her breath, and Jennie looked at her askance. “What was that?” she asked suspiciously.

“I said, I think it’s cute how you’re using ‘cute’ as a euphemism for ‘wet’!” Lisa enunciated overly clearly now, causing Chaeyoung and Jisoo to collapse against each other in fits of giggles. Jennie folded her arms across her chest and sulked.

“I should have been a solo artist,” she muttered petulantly, causing her other members to burst into fresh peals of laughter.

“Aw, don’t be like that, unnie,” Chaeyoung finally said once she’d sobered up. “Y/n’s super cute, it’s only normal that you’d be interested in her.”

Flushing, Jennie sank deeper into her seat and tucked her chin into her chest, refusing to look at anyone. She’d only just come to terms with her sexuality, and definitely wasn’t ready for you. Your nervous lip-biting and the way she’d catch you staring at her almost reverently when you thought she wasn’t looking were stirring up deep urges she hadn’t known she had. She wanted to ruin you, have you panting, splayed out and begging beneath her. Even the thought of it made her want to squirm in her seat.

What would it be like to have you on your knees for her?

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The next time you saw Jennie, it was the dead of night.

Well, that might be an exaggeration, but five am was certainly not a pleasant time to be at a TV studio, and you’d had to wake up even earlier to be the first one there to set up with all the things. Thankfully, you’d been able to collect the clothes last night.

Dressed comfortably in a warm plaid shirt and leggings, your hair gathered into a haphazard bun on top of your head and glasses perched on your nose, you hardly looked like a professional stylist, but at five in the morning, you honestly didn’t give a rat’s ass.

You were halfway through your coffee when the girls filed in, looking equally out of it. There was no time for slowly waking up, though, because you had to work fast if you were to get them to the stage in time. At least Jennie could nap while you were working on her makeup. You didn’t mind, since her eyes being closed made it easier for you to work on her makeup.

You shook her awake before you applied her lipstick because she had to open her mouth slightly, and she blinked sleepily at you before yawning. “Want coffee,” she mumbled, and you felt your heart squeeze from how cute she was. Even half-asleep, however, she was magnetic and compelling, and you found yourself reacting immediately to obey her.

Reaching for your own cup, which you’d set on the dresser, you offered it to her. “Do you want some of mine?” you asked, holding it out to her. “I drank some already, but you can have the rest of it if you want…”

Without a word, she accepted the proffered cup, and you continued helping her get ready, running a flat iron through her hair after finishing her makeup. You had to touch up her lipstick again before she went onstage because some of it was smeared on the plastic lid of your cup.

At the time, neither of you thought much about it, since you’d both been sleepy and otherwise occupied, but later, it wouldn’t leave your minds.

Jennie went over that moment over and over again, where she’d told you what she wanted and you’d leapt to get it for her. There was no shortage of people who would bend to her every whim, of course – it was one of the perks of being an idol. But when you did it so naturally, it made heat stir in her. You obeyed so readily, like there was nothing you wouldn’t do for her, and she wanted to test the limits of that obedience in a way she’d never experienced before.

It was almost scary, and she didn’t quite know what to make of it. She didn’t think this was a crush – she’d had those before, and it had always involved a lot of dreaming about cute kisses and cuddles. This… was different, and she didn’t know if it was a good thing. Surely it wasn’t normal or healthy to think about bending someone else to your will?

You, on the other hand, couldn’t stop puzzling over the same thing. Jennie had a way of making you act strangely. First the way she was able to fluster you just by being around you, and now this? Despite how you’d been acting around her, you weren’t generally a docile person, and it was weird that she was able to bring out this side of you that you’d never even known existed.

After thinking about it more on one of your free days where Jennie didn’t have any official appearances, you figured it was probably just that she was a famous idol and your boss, so of course you wanted to do whatever it took to please her. It was only natural, being nice to the boss, right? The satisfaction you felt at doing what she said was just because you knew you were doing a good job at being her stylist, that’s all.

Satisfied that you’d figured it out, you returned to writing the article you’d been working on. Being an assistant stylist didn’t pay much, and even though you were living in a tiny studio apartment you needed the additional income from freelancing to pay the bills. It ate up most of your spare time, but then again, with the irregular hours you kept as a stylist, it wasn’t like you had much of a social life anyway.

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Really, you thought as you waited for Jennie to get out of the changing area, Jiyoon might be a genius and visionary, but you really wished she would spare a thought for practical considerations. The boots she’d insisted on dressing Jennie in were stylish and all, but had the most ridiculously complex laces that you’d ever seen, and you’d literally had to practice tying them last night.

They were currently sitting innocuously by the screen, and you glared at them. It was going to take ages for Jennie to get them on, and you didn’t have that kind of time. Why did they have to be so gorgeous? As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t hate them – they were truly a work of art.

When Jennie came out from behind the screen, you bit your lip hard to keep any noises from escaping. Stay professional, you ordered yourself. It was hard, though, when she was in a white ruffled crop top and short shorts that showed off so much skin.

Clearing your throat awkwardly, you picked up the boots. “Here,” you said, handing them to her.

Jennie took them from you to sit down on the couch, bending over to tie the laces. She struggled with them – especially since Jiyoon had chosen a particularly intricate knot – and looked up at you for help.

“No, it goes over and then under, and you have to loop the other side through—” Your explanations fizzled out when Jennie started looking visibly annoyed. “Here, I’ll help,” you said, kneeling in front of her to tie them, thankful that you’d practiced last night so that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself by fiddling with them in front of her.

“Wait, I want to see how you do it,” Jennie interrupted, standing to move to the mirror. You followed her then knelt again, narrating what you were doing to her.

Despite her original intention of learning the complex knot you were performing with the boots, the moment Jennie looked down and saw you kneeling in front of her, all rationality fled her brain. You continued blathering on about the laces, completely oblivious to the hunger rising in her. Having you on your knees for her just felt so right, so hot, that she involuntarily clenched, barely holding back a shiver that would definitely have given her away.

Finishing up the second boot, you looked up, and the words on your lips faded away as you took in the intense stare on you. Your reaction was instantaneous, your eyes widening as your fingers fell away from her boots. You were completely speechless, spellbound and struck dumb, completely transfixed by her gaze as it seared into you.

Later, you couldn’t possibly say how long you’d been stuck like that, staring at each other, lost in your own world. Moving like she was possessed, Jennie reached out and petted the top of your head softly, and a tiny whimper escaped with the rush of air that left your lungs. The sound startled her into remembering where you were, in a small room with all the members and stylists watching, and she jerked her hand back. Just like that, the moment ended, and you squeaked as you ducked your head.

“Uh, yeah, so these are good to go,” you mumbled, patting the sides of her calf before standing up. Awkwardly, you both made your way to the makeup station, where you started working on her face.

Today, there was no lingering gaze while you did her makeup. Instead, Jennie wanted to crawl in a hole. To die of embarrassment, sure, but also, there was a lingering sense of arousal as she couldn’t get the image of you kneeling for her out of her mind, looking up at her with those wide eyes.

As you worked on her eyeshadow, Jennie daydreamed about that moment, about what she might have done if you’d been alone. As she thought about it, that fraught moment where your gazes had met took on different tones and nuances, and when she considered how good you could be for her, it was a struggle to keep from biting her lower lip.

Really, this was getting to be a problem, she thought as she stood up to join the other members for sound check. Lisa smirked at her and Jisoo winked, and all hope that no one had noticed that little slip-up was dashed. At least Chaeyoung, who was Jennie’s new favourite, just patted her on the arm and didn’t say anything about it. As they left the changing room, Jennie tried to ignore how slick her panties were.

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Being the new hire anywhere was difficult, but it was even worse as a stylist, because the newest member of the team always got stuck with cleanup and all the admin work involved in getting and returning the borrowed pieces. Thankfully, Yuuki, the stylist who’d been hired before you, helped you out whenever she could.

As a result, the two of you had become close friends – it was almost inevitable when you spent almost every waking hour of every day together, either on location with the girls or in meetings with Jiyoon discussing future concepts and looks for events, shoots and performances. Tonight, Yuuki had asked you to go drinking with her because her mother was coming to visit and, given all the other stylist had done for you, you could hardly turn her down.

After she accompanied you back to the warehouse where you had to drop off the shoes and accessories, and then the Chanel, Dior and Gucci offices, she dragged you to a little restaurant where you had supper and drank soju.

You were pretty sure you knew what was coming, but Yuuki at least had the grace to pretend, bitching about Jiyoon and the two more senior assistant stylists on the Blackpink team with you before zeroing in on you and Jennie.

She waited, a twinkle in her eye, for you to throw back your shot of soju before asking slyly, “So, you and Jennie, huh?” You choked on the clear liquid the moment you heard her, slamming the glass back onto the table and grabbing some napkins while you coughed helplessly.

“No,” you protested. “There’s nothing going on there.”

Yuuki rolled her eyes. “Don’t lie to your unnie.”

“I’m not! Really. I don’t even know what you’re talking about, I—” Excuses and justifications tumbled out as your mind burst into overdrive, your hands gesticulating wildly in an attempt to show her how sincere you were in your denials. Yuuki just propped her chin on the heel of her palm and waited you out patiently, her chopsticks in her other hand picking at the kimchi pancake you were sharing.

When you finally fizzled out, your shoulders slumping helplessly, Yuuki looked up at you again, her eyes glinting. “Really? So do you want to explain what happened earlier today?”

Fuck. You truly had no explanation for her. Your ears drew up around your shoulders uncomfortably, as you used the only card you had left to play. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No? Then let me refresh your memory.” Yuuki’s smirk made you regret every single choice that had led to this point. Why had you decided to go to fashion school? You should have just been an accountant like your parents wanted. “I’m talking about earlier today, when you were practically eye fucking Jennie while helping her get dressed.”

“Unnie!”

“I’m just saying, usually it goes the other way, yknow?” Yuuki continued in a faux-nonchalant tone, even though her facial expression made it clear that she was very aware of what she was saying and enjoying your distress.

“Please stop,” you begged, crumpling onto the table in embarrassment. “I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”

“Aww,” Yuuki reached over to pet your head, and you didn’t even swat her hand away. “It’s okay, baby. We’ve all been there. You just need to be better at hiding your crush.”

What— “I don’t have a crush,” you denied immediately, your head popping up. Sure, Jennie might render you speechless once in a while, and you felt all jittery when she looked directly at you, but that wasn’t anything special. She was an idol, of course she had a magnetic and charismatic personality.

Yuuki took in your slightly confused frown and raised a brow at you. “Sweetie… you have the biggest crush I’ve ever seen. Don’t worry, though, she likes you back. Neither of you are subtle with all the staring.”

You felt like you were in freefall. “What—I don’t…” you stammered. “I don’t like girls.” You’d never even had an inkling of that. Every crush you’d ever had had been a guy. You��d only ever had boyfriends. There was no way you liked Jennie in the way that Yuuki was claiming you did.

“That’s not what it looks like to me,” Yuuki shrugged. Taking in the absolutely gobsmacked expression on your face, though, she backtracked a little, softening her words. “Sweetie, it’s okay,” she said, reaching over to squeeze your hand. “You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.”

Your mind, however, was still buffering and you barely registered a word she said. “I like men,” you murmured almost forlornly, your brows knitting in confusion. Yuuki, just now realizing that she’d broken you, topped off your drink without a word, letting you process your thoughts quietly.

When you were finally ready to talk again, you looked up at her once more. “Do you really think I have a crush?”

Yuuki shrugged. “What do you feel when you think about Jennie?”

You hummed thoughtfully, your mind drifting for a moment as you recalled your previous interactions with her. Limited, sure, but every one was charged in some way, filling you with butterflies or nerves, making your mouth dry up sometimes and at others causing almost uncontrollable giggles to burst from you.

Watching the soft, dazed look in your eyes as you thought about her question, Yuuki couldn’t quite hold back the triumphant smirk. Your expression made it abundantly clear to her, even if you were taking your time coming to terms with it, that you weren’t as straight as you claimed to be.

“She’s just charismatic because she’s an idol,” you defended weakly as you finally came back to yourself.

“Do you feel the same way about the other members, then? They’re all idols too,” Yuuki pointed out.

You subsided into a pout.

“Well, what did you feel when you were with your last boyfriend?” Yuuki prompted after a second. “Like, at the beginning.”

“Like butterflies, and I was so excited to see him all the time, and when he looked at me in that way…” You bit your lip, remembering, then frowned as you realized how similar it was to your feelings about Jennie. “Oh, fuck.”

Reaching over, Yuuki petted your head again. “It’s okay, sweetie. It’s no big deal.”

“No big deal?! Unnie, how are you this calm? Does everyone know?” How were you the last person to realize?

“I’m sure Jiyoon-unnie didn’t notice – you know she rarely pays attention to the stylists.” You grimaced as you nodded – your boss was now established enough in the industry that she hardly needed to think about the nitty-gritty details of actually dressing the idols under her care. “But you guys are not subtle at all.”

“Jesus,” you muttered, lowering your head into your hands.

“Don’t worry, nobody cares. Half the people in the room are in entertainment and the other half are in fashion,” she said blithely.

You just reached for your soju.

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If you’d thought that becoming aware of why Jennie had such a hold over you would make things easier, you were wrong. It was like once the denial was gone, the feelings came rushing in, and you were sure that you’d made an absolute fool of yourself in front of Jennie with your inability to construct complete sentences and the way you rushed to do her bidding.

Thankfully, Jennie was either completely oblivious or an angel, because she never laughed or became impatient with you. She thanked you sweetly when you brought her coffee or food, never said anything when you lost your train of thought or stared, and even complimented you on your own outfit once, which had shut your brain down for a while.

Of course, it wasn’t that Jennie hadn’t noticed – on the contrary, she was thoroughly enjoying it. Who wouldn’t like having the object of your affections fawning over you, she tried to convince herself as you fussed over her hair. Today she had a magazine shoot, so it was just the two of you, and you’d snuck her some tteokbokki from the street market nearby that you’d picked up on your way.

Once she was ready, you followed her out of the dressing room with her lipstick and powder in your hands, ready for touchups. Watching Jennie as she posed for shoots or did interviews was one of the perks of the job, you supposed. Working with her hadn’t made you any less of a fan – in fact, the opposite was true. You admired how pretty and poised she always looked (and okay, at least part of that was your handiwork) and the way she was so natural in front of the camera.

Since nothing in your life could ever be easy, today’s shoot was supposed to have some sort of sexy, seductress theme. The photographer kept telling Jennie to give him a more intense expression, and you weren’t quite sure what that meant, but Jennie sure did. She leaned forward, planting her hands between her thighs on the edge of the box she was sitting on as her eyes swept the room.

You gulped as she found you, standing behind and a little to the side of the camera. Her lips stretched into a half-smirk that the director nodded approvingly at, and her gaze took on a downright predatory quality. In that moment, trapped, you clenched your fists so hard you felt the hard edge of the lipstick tube bite into your skin, but you couldn’t find the coordination to let go.

Her eyes drifted over your body leisurely, and even though you were dressed fairly modestly, in an off-the-shoulder sweater and leggings, you felt exposed, like you were standing in front of her in just lingerie. Against your will, you felt yourself gush into your panties as you bit your lip to hold back a moan.

By the time they took a break to let you touch up her makeup, your knees were weak and you felt unsteady as you walked the short distance to Jennie, grimacing at the discomfort of your soaked panties sliding against your core. Jennie turned her face up towards you as you blotted the sweat gathering around her temples and on her upper lip with a tissue.

“Thank you,” she murmured as you finished, pulling the powder puff away from her face. Her hand shot up and encircled your wrist, stroking the tender skin on the inside gently before releasing it. The simple touch scrambled your brain, and you spent an embarrassingly long time searching for the words before you could say anything.

“No problem,” you squeaked before running off to safety, your skin tingling where she’d touched it.

Jennie watched you leave with a small, triumphant smirk on her face. She loved the effect she had on you. It made her feel so powerful, so sexy, like she could imprint her mark into your very existence. How cute you were when you became flustered was definitely another bonus.

For the rest of the shoot, Jennie floated off the adrenaline of teasing you constantly. Making you give her unnecessary help with her wardrobe changes like zipping and unzipping her clothes and adjusting her accessories, holding her hand that time the director of the shoot had insisted that she wear heels no human woman would be able to walk in, and, of course, continuing with the casual physical contact that skirted the edge of boundaries of appropriateness. The camera was eating it up, too, loving the way she posed and that slightly distracted, intense, far-off gaze while she was actually watching you.

By the time the shoot ended, both of you were so wound up that you could barely focus on anything. Even Jennie seemed to have reached her limit, hastily leaving before you when her manager came back around to pick her up with a mumbled goodbye. Even her manager was surprised by how quickly she got packed up.

Now alone in the dressing room, you were able to pack all the makeup and do inventory fairly quickly. Laying all the jewelry back in their respective cases, you frowned when you realized that there was one box that was empty.

“Shit,” you hissed as you looked around the room, reopening the makeup bag to see if the camellia lily pendant had slipped in somehow. It wasn’t there, and you started to get a little more frantic as you started checking in all the boxes and doing a sweep of the room.

“Oh, fuck,” you swore as despair started to settle in your belly, pressing your palm against your forehead as you fought back the tears pressing hotly against your eyes. You couldn’t lose a piece of jewelry from Chanel – you couldn’t afford to replace it, and you would definitely be fired if it wasn’t back there.

Taking deep breaths to calm yourself down as you paced the length of the small room, you tried to think about where it could be. Jennie had been wearing it for the second half the shoot; had she taken it off? Frantically, you dived for your phone, leaning against the wall as you called her.

Jennie had just entered the dorm when her phone rang. She fished it out of her handbag and looked at the screen, raising a brow when she saw that it was you.

“Hello?” she said with the phone to her ear, taking off her shoes and stepping out of the genkan.

“Unnie? Are you wearing the Chanel necklace?” you asked urgently, surging off the wall as you spoke.

“Uhh…” Jennie’s free hand went to her neck, where she was, indeed, wearing it. “Yeah, it’s with me.”

You sagged with relief. “Oh, thank God. I’ll come over and pick it up now.”

“You’re—you’re coming over?” Jennie sat on the edge of her bed, letting Kuma curl up in her lap. She was definitely not prepared for this, and she looked around in a panic.

“Yeah, I need to return the necklace tonight. I’ll just come pick it up, okay?”

“Uh, sure.” With that, you hung up, and Jennie picked Kuma up, petting him with her free hand. She knew it was no big deal, that you were just expecting her to hand the pendant to you at the door and she could be on her way, but somehow that didn’t feel like enough. She wanted more. This was such an unusual opportunity, and she had to make the most of it.

She spent the next half an hour going through her entire closet to find the perfect outfit – one that looked cute and chic, but that she could conceivably be lounging around the house in. Finally, she settled on a Chanel sweatshirt and denim shorts, tugging on the neckline so that it showed off more of her décolletage.

Just as she was putting her hair up in an artfully messy bun, she heard the bell ring, and before she could get to the door, one of the other members opened it.

“Jisoo-unnie, hi!” Your voice was slightly muffled because Jennie’s bedroom door was closed, but that didn’t stop her from listening attentively to your conversation with Jisoo. You chatted with her for a moment, and when she invited you in, you declined politely, saying you had to be on your way to return all the stuff.

Excitement made her slightly clumsy, but she forced herself to take a breath and walk instead of run down the hallway to the front door. Your eyes widened as you saw her coming up behind Jisoo, and your cheeks heated as you visibly lost your train of thought at the sight of her. Jennie gave herself a metaphorical pat on the back but didn’t let any of it show as she smiled at you.

“Unnie, hi,” you greeted. “Do you have the necklace?”

“Yeah,” she replied, coming to stand right on the edge of the step. The sideways glance she shot Jisoo let the older girl know she should make herself scarce quickly, and Jisoo, ever tactful, excused herself and returned to her own room.

You hesitated, wondering why Jennie wasn’t handing you the pendant so you could make yourself scarce. Standing on the step, she was literally looking down on you, something you found both titillating and intimidating.

“Well, here it is,” she said, reaching into the neckline of her sweatshirt and hooking her finger around the chain to pull the necklace out.

“Uhh…” Your eyes widened awkwardly, not sure what she wanted you to do.

“The clasp is a little finicky, can you help me out?” she asked, turning around.

“Yeah, sure,” you agreed immediately, your hands lifting almost of their own accord to do her bidding. You didn’t even question why she’d left it on for so long, or why she hadn’t gotten one of her members to help her out when she’d arrived at home. There was a moment of silence as you fiddled with the clasp, before you got it loose and drew it off her neck. She turned right before your hands dropped to your sides, and there was a moment where they were hovering near her collarbones as you made eye contact.

Swallowing, you looked away, biting your lip, and the moment was broken. With the necklace in your hand, you were about to grab your things and leave when Jennie stopped you with her hand on your sleeve. “Wait,” she said, and you turned back questioningly to look at her. “Let me give you a ride home,” she offered, looking down at the giant bags you’d lugged with you.

“You can drive?” was your skeptical reaction.

Jennie chuckled. “New CEO, new rules,” she explained. “I’ll go get my keys.”

“Wait, unnie, you don’t have to!” you called hastily. “I can take the subway, and you’ll probably be recognized…” She ignored you, though, and you trailed off in slight embarrassment as you realized that you were talking to no one.

She reemerged from her room a second later, holding her wallet and keys with one hand and dangling a mask from the other. “Let’s go,” she said, and you followed meekly, grabbing your bags as she passed you.

Jennie led you down to the underground carpark of the apartment complex, where her BMW was parked. She opened the boot for you to throw your stuff in it, then slid into the driver’s seat as you got into the passenger seat.

“So, uh, how long have you been driving?” you asked, buckling your seatbelt.

Jennie chuckled as she started the car. “Why, are you afraid?” she asked, swinging out of the lot.

“No, no,” you demurred hastily, not wanting to offend her. “I was just curious. I didn’t know you were allowed to.”

“Don’t worry,” Jennie reassured you. “Where do you need to go?”

“Uh, I have to drop off some stuff at the Chanel office, and the rest of it belongs to the YG vault.”

Nodding, Jennie set the GPS and drove off. While she was ferrying you around (and what a surreal experience, being driven by YG’s princess!) you chatted about nothing and everything. You were honestly surprised that Jennie was so easy to talk to, having thought, perhaps meanly, that there was no way she could react to your broke life of scraping by with a bunch of student debt and a full-time job that paid next to nothing. She was interested in your stories about growing up in a small town and coming to Seoul for fashion school, and in return told you about what it was like living in New Zealand and being a trainee.

Jennie entered the underground carpark of the YG headquarters and you unsnapped your seat belt, ready to hop off. “Thanks for the ride today, unnie. You really didn’t have to,” you said, starting to bid her farewell.

“Wait, how are you going to get home?” she asked as you were opening the door.

“Uh, I’ll take the subway?” Confused, your response came out as a question.

“It’s late, you shouldn’t be on the subway alone! I’ll drive you.”

“No, you don’t have to—” You started explaining that you did this almost every night and it wasn’t a big deal, but Jennie wasn’t having any of it, insisting that she would take you home tonight. Finally, you had no choice but to accept, although secretly you felt warm inside at the thought that she was so concerned about you. No one had fussed over you very much since you’d come to Seoul alone.

After you dropped off the items at the vault, you returned to the car, and Jennie took you home.

“Jeez, this is where you live?” Jennie muttered, looking up at the dilapidated building the GPS brought you to.

You grimaced at her tone. “Being a stylist doesn’t exactly pay a lot,” you said defensively, unbuckling your seat belt.

“No, I didn’t mean it that way,” Jennie backtracked quickly. “But this building doesn’t look that safe,” she added, peering up again in concern.

“It’s okay.” You shrugged. “It looks better on the inside. And it’s close to the subway, too.”

“That’s good,” Jennie said, smiling at you. “Well, good night.”

“Wait!” You surprised even yourself by blurting it out. “Do you… want to come in for some coffee? You’ve been driving me around all evening, I feel bad.”

“I’d love to!” Jennie eagerly accepted, then her brows knit together as she started second-guessing herself. “I wouldn’t want to impose, though…”

“Don’t worry about that,” you said, reaching over to pat her hand on the gear stick, before realizing what you’d done and retracting your hand, embarrassed. Jennie parked the car by the curb, and you led her up into your apartment.

“Um, here it is,” you said slightly awkwardly as you opened the front door, stepping in and turning on the lights. You hadn’t thought about actually having Jennie in your space, looking at your apartment, even as you were issuing the invitation, and you couldn’t help but feel a little self-conscious now, especially knowing what Jennie’s own home looked like.

With a critical eye, you looked over your tiny studio. The queen-sized bed dominated the space, pushed up against the far wall and under the window. You kept a few small succulents on the windowsill because they were the only things you could keep alive. Your closets were overflowing with clothes, to the extent that you’d had to buy extra racks to hang some items off, and your vanity was cluttered with jewelry organizers that were bursting with accessories. (In your defense, you’d gone into fashion because you liked fashion!)

The sink in the kitchenette was piled high with dishes, and your bin was filled with empty takeout containers. Some clothes were strewn on your bed over your bedspread, and your desk was filled with papers and notes, your laptop sitting in the middle of it all.

“Sorry it’s such a mess,” you apologized. For the last week or so you’d only been sleeping in your apartment and rushing out in the morning for long days.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jennie said, waving her hand dismissively as she took off her shoes. “You should see our apartment.” Jennie, taking in your living quarters, noted very different details – the pretty, whimsical patterned bedspread you had bought, the post cards and photos you had on your fridge, and the dizzying array of clothes you’d amassed.

You puttered around the kitchen, setting up your percolator for freshly brewed coffee. It was only clean because you went with instant most mornings to save some time, but you found yourself being grateful for it nonetheless. You only had the one desk chair, so you directed Jennie to sit on the bed, taking out the little foldable table you kept for when guests came over and setting it up.

“Thank you,” Jennie said gratefully, taking the mug you held out for her, before you sat down next to her with your own cup of coffee.

“Cheers,” you muttered awkwardly, bumping your mug against hers, before taking a deep, long sip to hide how embarrassed you were. What the hell was wrong with you?

Jennie, surprised and charmed, blinked at you for a second before drinking her own coffee. You continued chatting about everything and nothing, even when you started stifling yawns and blinking the sleepy tears out of your eyes stubbornly, not wanting this night to end. Eventually, feeling half-drunk from tiredness, you fell back onto the bed, looking up at the ceiling.

“Unnie,” you murmured, and she lay down beside you on her side, continuing to watch you. The quiet intimacy of this moment made her heart flutter as she admired the way your lashes made little shadows on your cheekbones.

“What is it?” she asked, shifting infinitesimally closer.

“You’re so pretty,” you said around a yawn, turning your head to look at her.

“Thank you, sweetie.” She reached out to caress the side of your face, leaning in slightly.

A tense second passed as your gaze flickered down to her lips, then you closed the distance between the two of you, pressing your lips to hers. Your fingers curled around her hand, which was still resting against your face, stroking her palm with your fingertips. It was chaste, tender and sweet – the opposite of every desire Jennie had ever had about you, and she found that she loved it all the same.

When she broke away, you looked down shyly and she leaned her forehead against yours, seeking your gaze. A second later, she realized that you’d actually closed your eyes and fallen asleep instead of acting coy like she’d thought, and she chuckled to herself before she was seized by her own jaw-cracking yawn.

As she settled in next to you, Jennie promised herself that she was just going to rest her eyes for ten minutes before getting up and driving home.

#kwritersworldnet #blackpink smut #jennie smut #blackpink fanfiction #jennie fanfiction #bp smut #bp scenarios

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lizardkingeliot · 4 years ago

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First Line Meme

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line, then tag 10 of your favorite authors!

tagged by @phoenix-ascended thank you!!!! 💖

Okay SO. I’m gonna cheat a little bit here. The first nine I’m going to post are all going to be from the first nine chapters of time cast a spell on you (but you won’t forget me) but to be fair the chapters are so long they each might as well be a story all their own lmao. ANYWAY. Here we go. I’ll post the first paragraph from each I guess, in order of chapter number obvs:

1. Quentin shook out the tension in his hands. He didn’t understand why it wasn’t getting any easier. For days on end he’d been trying to perfect the illumination spell the rest of his fellow First Years had nailed in a matter of hours. But no matter how he tried, Quentin couldn’t seem to make anything more than a spark.

2. Quentin waited until Eliot was asleep to slip out of bed and hastily tug his clothes back on. The illuminated screen of his phone told him it was just past 12am. Clutching his shoes to his chest, he opened the door as quietly as he could manage and tip-toed out into the hall, all but running to his room and clicking the lock shut firmly behind him.

3. Dry-mouthed and groggy, Quentin woke in Eliot’s bed alone. He groaned, groping around for his phone to check the time for a long moment before remembering he’d left it in his room. Quentin rubbed at his eyes, rolling over and up to his feet, muscles he didn’t even know existed screaming as he went. He picked his bathrobe up from the floor and pulled it on, then tottered down the hall to empty his bladder and brush his teeth and gulp down frantic handfuls of water from the bathroom sink.

4. Tuesday morning was hell. Quentin woke just before eleven, empty as a husk. Filthy, all used up. His thighs sticking together where Eliot’s come had dried there in the night. Quickly realizing he’d already missed his first class of the day, Quentin pressed his face into his pillow, pulled the covers up over his head, and surrendered to the blank comfort of late morning sleep.

5. Quentin couldn’t feel his face, or much of his body for that matter. Which was… fine. It was great. It was fucking phenomenal. As long as it meant he also couldn’t feel the sinkhole that had formed in the center of his chest. The one that had been there for days, weeks, months, fucking years. He couldn’t feel anything at all.

6. Quentin felt a lever turn inside his chest, the source of his magic eking out a spark. Enough at least to send a message to Julia back at Brakebills. One of those little enchanted paper airplanes they’d learned his first week in Practical Applications that he never could get to fly quite right. He scrawled his SOS on a cocktail napkin and watched it flutter away like the world’s saddest butterfly. The universe took pity on him. Quentin figured he was probably due. 7. Christmas morning was a lackluster affair.

Exchanging gift cards over coffee and devouring great mounds of Ted Coldwater’s Famous Ham and Eggs while still in their pajamas. After, Julia and Quentin lay on the living room floor and Skyped with James, his grandparents waving hello from Pennsylvania in the background. They opened the stack of impersonal and overly-extravagant gifts from Julia’s mother that had been delivered to the house the night before. Quentin received a pair of cashmere socks and a leather belt with a shiny silver buckle.

8. Quentin stood at the bathroom sink, watching his face shift in the steamy mirror glass. Stark naked save for the towel looped around his hips. Hair dripping in cool, fat beads down onto the planks of his shoulders. So clean he swore he could feel himself sparkling from the inside out.

9. Quentin tossed his phone down onto the floor and leaned back into Eliot’s heat. “It’s almost like you want my dad to know I’m faking sick so I can stay in and let you fuck me until I pass out.”

Some patterns I guess: I love how chapters 2-4 all open with Quentin in bed after hooking up with eliot but all with very different vibes. In chapter 2, he’s just experienced subspace for the first time without having any idea that’s what actually happened to him and he is having A Time. In chapter 3, they had a very intense hook-up the night before and Quentin is sneaking out again, but this time he fully plans on returning right after. And in chapter 4, we see the joy of their beginnings at Columbia contrasted hard with the misery of where Quentin is at Brakebills.

ALSO 2/3 of the chapters begin with Quentin’s name which feels right considering just how deep into his headspace we are in this fic.

Okay. Anyway. Moving on:

10. Eliot loved watching Quentin lose himself in a moment.

It could be anything really: mastering a brand new spell; savoring something decadent and sweet; fussing with his hair when he thought no one was looking; focusing very hard on making himself a cocktail and getting the ratios just right; ranting about his Fillory books; reading his Fillory books, to himself but especially aloud; reading anything; riding dick...

That last one held a particularly special place in Eliot’s heart.

(from but i would die for you in secret aka the one where eliot is pretty sure quentin is only using him for his dick. spoiler alert: he’s not they’re just idiots)

11. Teddy was turning six years old. There was nothing in the world he loved more than stories.

His favorite was a version of Lord of the Rings Quentin had cobbled together from memory. He must have told it to their son a hundred times before it occurred to Eliot he could contribute more to story time than ogling Quentin’s hands while he spoke, or popping in to suggest when the Balrog should actually be making an appearance, Quentin.

(from in a land far away aka the mosaic fic where eliot makes margo hand puppets for teddy)

12. The words came out of Quentin’s mouth without a single coherent thought behind them.

“I’m just about to catch a movie with my boyfriend!”

There, outside the coffee shop on Eighth Avenue, Quentin’s maybe-friend from high school whose name he couldn’t even remember shot him a wide-mouthed grin. “Oh, that’s wonderful!” she said. “Which movie? My wife Danielle and I don’t have any plans for the afternoon and we’d love to tag along. Isn’t that right sweetie?”

(from your name like a song (i sing to myself) aka the one where quentin’s memory is shit and he and eliot pretend to be boyfriends in a post-monster world)

13. Eliot dropped the last box onto the floor. “Daddy’s wardrobe is safe at last,” he said, lowering himself down into the gold chair with a sigh. “Though I can’t seem to shake the terrible feeling that Todd raided my closet at the Cottage before I could get to it all.”

Quentin surveyed the damage from his spot on the sofa: there were at least seven large packing boxes bursting at their seams scattered around the penthouse. “I don’t know how you would even be able to tell. I’m pretty sure one of those boxes is just vests.”

Eliot quirked a brow in his direction. “Some of us are cultivating an aesthetic, Quentin,” he said. “And I didn’t see you complaining when I let you dress me for dinner last night.”

Quentin couldn’t help but smile. “I wouldn’t call picking between two pre-approved ties dressing you, El.”

“I’m also counting the fact that you said my ass looked great in my new pants.”

(from the parentheses (all clicking shut behind you) aka the suspender porn fic)

14. The night Quentin Coldwater died, a brand new star appeared in the sky over Brakebills. A little brighter than Venus, it stayed fixed in the same position for weeks on end. Eliot hardly would have noticed such a thing if it hadn’t been for the way that it hummed. Or at least, that’s how it felt. A humming in his bones. An old, familiar presence. Margo thought that he’d gone mad with grief. Alice was the only one who could understand.

(from a myth of devotion aka the one where eliot is sorta icarus and quentin is sorta the sun)

15. It didn’t happen the way Eliot expected it to. He dropped the letter into the mailbox, and pain blossomed in his abdomen so brightly it was like he’d gone supernova.

And everything went dark.

(from by night, beloved, tie your heart to mine aka the one where eliot sends the letter)

16. Eliot stretched out over the mosaic, his shirt riding up just a little as he clicked a yellow tile into place, and Quentin’s pulse leapt in his neck once, twice. Three times. His breath hitched. It was becoming nearly impossible to focus. In the heat of the sun, watching the sweat soak Eliot’s shirt clean-through.

(from i won’t deny (all the things i would do) aka the one where quentin and eliot start hooking up three months into their life at the mosaic)

17. After they decided kissing on the mouth was okay, Quentin and Eliot wanted to do it all the time. In every corner of the penthouse (“If you don’t stop sucking face while I’m trying to eat my sandwich,” Kady said one afternoon, “I’m literally going to feed you to the Baba Yaga.”), outside coffee shops, in between bites at the sushi place in Chelsea that Eliot loved. Once, they went to see a movie they couldn’t even remember the name of just to make out for two blissful, uninterrupted hours in the dark.

(from and a song of praise upon your lips aka part three of the box of chocolates series where quentin and eliot are definitely dating and finally talk about their feelings)

18. Eliot startled awake to something sharp and pointed slamming into his shin. He opened his eyes, and the toe of Margo’s shoe made contact one last time. Pain seared up the side of his leg, and he winced. Jesus, she really did not realize her own strength sometimes. Or the strength of her Jimmy Choo’s.

(from that you may know (the secrets of your heart) aka part two of box of chocolates aka the one where hand stuff is still banging)

19. Eliot Waugh was High King in his blood, and somehow that felt right. When they first arrived in Fillory, Quentin assumed he would be the one to wear the crown. He’d dreamed of it most of his life after all. On the throne in Whitespire, a fleet of talking animals at his disposal, a noble quest waiting around every corner to ferry him away to the next grand, heart-stopping adventure. But when the blade bit into his palm and drew no blood, and Eliot’s came up red, it felt like the final piece of some perfect puzzle clicking into place.

(from and this is the map of my heart aka the one where quentin wants to marry eliot and they have some incredibly filthy sex before everything falls apart)

20. Eliot walked into the penthouse to an eerie quiet. He found Quentin sitting in the kitchen under a dim illumination spell, drinking a beer and poking at the screen of his phone.

“Hey,” Eliot said, setting his shopping bag down on the counter. “Where is everyone?”

Quentin sighed, rubbing at his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days. “Out. I don’t know.”

Eliot squinted at him. “You didn’t want to go with them?”

Quentin lifted his eyes, shot Eliot a look. “No.”

(from for love (if it finds you worthy) aka part one of the box of chocolates series)

And I have now been here doing this for so long I no longer have time to try and find anymore patterns lmao BUT I will be tagging: @thelucindac @akisazame @fishfingersandscarves @nellie-elizabeth @freneticfloetry @rubickk7 and anyone else who wants to play!

#the magicians #queliot #otp: proof of concept #myfic

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logical-little-lies · 4 years ago

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{Chapter 7/Halloween Special- Halloween Tears}//Soft, Cute, and Far Smarter Than You (Sanders Sides Agere/CGLRE)

A/N:Y'all ik Halloween was like, a week ago, but I wanted to make this chapter good for y'all. I didn't mean to make it as angsty as I did so yeah-

here's your warning for crying, emotions, and Logan snapping at Patton. Enjoy!

It was finally Halloween, and the Core Sides were rather happy due to this fact.

Everyone in the house was so excited. Patton and Roman had been planning the perfect little day for their regressors for weeks, and had managed to keep it secret until just a few days prior. The two boys weren't to keen on it at first, worried about going out while in littlespace, but they were quickly reassured that everything would be alright.

They'd be trick or treating, watching children's Halloween's movies, and so much more. This was supposed to be a fun day for everyone.

Also, this was the first time ever that Logan voluntarily regressed.

"Do you have all the makeup stuff for your costume?" Roman asked, looking to Logan, who was currently using scissors to cut up a plain white t-shirt.

"Yep! My costume is gonna look so cool once it's done!" Logan cheered. He sat at the kitchen table, surrounded by different supplies. He kicked his feet underneath of him, swinging them back and forth just above the ground. He was around fifteen, but his positive emotions made his behaviors mix between those of a teenagers and those of a older toddler.

But he swore up and down that he was strictly a teenager at the moment.

"I'm sure it will, kiddo." Roman smiled at him, picking up his glass of water and ruffling Logan's hair on the way out of the kitchen.

Logan continued to work on his clothes for his costume, using paints and pens to decorate his shirt. He was shocked when he heard a knock at the door. "Can someone get the door?" Logan called out, setting his stuff down and turning in his seat so that he could see into the living room, he had a good view of whoever could be behind the front door.

"Who's here?" Patton came down the stairs, looking to Roman, who sat on the couch with Virgil. Roman shrugged.

"All four of us are here...so it could only be-" Roman spoke as Patton approached the door.

"Hello!" Remus cheered, greeting everyone the moment the door swung open. Janus seemed a lot less excited to be there, his arms crossed. Virgil locked eyes with him for a second, immediately burying his face into Roman's side. Roman wrapped his arm around him, holding him close.

"Chill out, we're not here to hurt you or anything. Remus thought-" Remus interrupted Janus's words with a look, silently urging him to correct himself. "We thought that we should celebrate Halloween with you...since we're trying to be kinder and work together and everything."

The Core Sides and Dark Sides were currently in a weird spot. After much conflict, they decided that they wanted to try and unite, be kind and stuff. But it was pretty hard to work together with someone when you've had a ongoing rivalry for the majority of your existence.

"You guys usually throw a party..but I'm assuming that something else is happening today?" Janus's eyes landed on Virgil, then on Logan, who quickly casted his glance downwards.

"Something else, yes. And you weren't invited," Patton finally spoke up, giving them a unkind glare that was so unlike himself.

"We're not here to start a fight! Why can't we join in on the family fun, hmm?" Remus tilted his head, looking at Patton with pleading eyes.

"Because.." Patton trailed off, looking over the the kitchen entrance at Logan, who was packing up his stuff in hopes of getting out of there. Patton couldn't come up with a good reason.

It was true, they were trying to work together and get on better terms with one another. If Patton blocked them out every time they initiated time together, then nothing would get better. But Virgil and Logan were regressed, so he needed to find an excuse.

"Cat got your tongue, Patton?" Remus questioned. Janus gave him a look, as if telling him to drop the mean tone.

"If this is about the nerd and the emo regressing, we don't care. We're open to spending time with them while they're in headspace." Janus explained.

Logan's head shot up, looking at them. Patton got the question out before him or Roman did, though. "How do you know-"

Janus cut him off, raising his hand in front of Patton's face, causing Patton to shut his mouth. "Virgil regressed even back when he lived with us...and he didn't hide it well. And it doesn't take genius to figure out that Logan does it too. We were never judging of it."

Patton nodded slowly, looking to Roman. "Let me talk to Roman, okay? Come sit inside for now." Patton stepped to the side, letting them in and shutting the door behind them. "Logan, watch your brother, please."

Logan nodded, agreeing to the task. Roman stood up, keeping hold of Virgil's hand and leading him over to Logan. "He's kinda scared..be nice to him, okay?" Roman asked.

"Of course," Logan stood up, taking Virgil's hand from Roman's, causing Virgil to pout. "Dad says that I'm a good brother." He spoke as if his words would erase any worry in Roman's mind that Virgil wasn't in good hands.

"You are, baby. You're doing great," Roman assured, turning to face Patton without another word.

Janus and Remus sat on the couch, looking back at Logan and Virgil, who seemed pretty scared. "You don't have to be scared of us. You know that, right?" Janus spoke first, locking eyes with Logan. He figured he'd understand what he was asking more then the toddler.

Logan shrugged, moving to pull out a chair for Virgil. Janus seemed kind of hurt my that response, but he didn't comment on it. "What are you two being for Halloween?" Remus offered, trying to redirect the conversation.

"Kitty!" Virgil blurted out with a light giggle. He couldn't talk super well when he was this young, so Logan was a little shocked to hear him respond so quickly to people who he hadn't been regressed around in a long time. Janus and Remus gave fond smiles to him.

"Really? That sounds like a great costume," Janus complimented. "How about you, Logan?"

"Uh, a zombie." Logan replied, his voice full of that teenage awkwardness that he absolutely hated. He didn't sound put together and smart, like when he was big. But he didn't sound cute either, like when he was younger. He just sounded weird.

"Ooh! Are you gonna do like, fake cuts and stuff?" Remus asked. Logan shrugged again.

"Probably, I'm not good at it though." He replied.

"Remus is very good at fake gore stuff! If your...caregivers?" Janus seemed questioning of the term, but Logan nodded, allowing Janus to continue. "If they let us stay, I'm sure he wouldn't mind helping you with your costume." Janus looked at Remus, who quickly nodded.

"Sounds good to me." Remus affirmed.

"Really?" Logan seemed excited. He knew how good Remus was at fake gore stuff. Of course, his powers aided in that, but he was also just decent at special effects makeup. Remus nodded. "Cool." Logan smiled, suddenly feeling a lot more comfortable then he did before.

They really weren't there to hurt them, or even make fun of them for regressing. They were being nice. Logan didn't make an effort to continue the conversation, turning and continuing his process of packing up his costume supplies so that he could bring it upstairs.

Roman and Patton didn't come back down stairs for a few minutes. When they did though, they came to stand in front of the couch, Patton making a motion to Logan to come into the living room.

"Okay, so we decided that if the boys are comfortable with it, then you can spend Halloween with us." Patton announced. There was a pause following his statement, so he spoke again. "What do you think, boys?"

"I'm okay with it, I guess." Logan said, before looking to Virgil next to him. Virgil nodded, seemingly nervous and hesitant, but not saying no.

"Okay, then it's settled. What's the plan for the day?" Janus leaned forward, looking at the two core sides in front of him.

"Where should I even begin?"

"Where's Logan?" Roman asked, sitting at the kitchen table with Virgil, helping him with his kitten whiskers. Of course, the toddler didn't enjoy sitting still, so Roman had to keep scolding him for moving.

Which of course led to Virgil feeling bad, setting an endless cycle of messed up makeup and babyish apologies. "Upstairs with Remus, he's helping with his makeup. They said they were almost done, though." Patton explained, setting two baskets down on the kitchen table.

One was shaped like a witched cauldron, and the other was a light blue basket covered in superhero stickers and sharpie doodles. You could probably figure out which one belonged to who.

"Okay, cool. I'm almost done with Vee, then we can get shoes on and head out." Roman smiled at Patton, who nodded. Patton went to exit the kitchen, pausing to kiss Virgil's forehead before continuing.

Upstairs, Remus held up a mirror for Logan as he packed up his makeup stuff. "Whoa! This looks awesome!" Logan exclaimed, looking over his face.

Logan was, at first, a little uncomfortable being alone with Remus while regressed. But then, Remus starting asking about his interests and what made him choose to be a zombie, and suddenly, that worry faded away as he rambled on about comic books and Netflix shows.

And just like his family, Remus sat there, listening and urging him to go on as he applied his makeup..

The fake gashes looked pretty convincing, and the dried fake blood on the side of his face looked pretty cool. He just hoped he wouldn't freak out his little brother to much. "Thank you," Logan remembered to use his manners, handing the mirror back to Remus.

"You're welcome. My brothers good at the glam makeup,but gore had always been my specialty." Remus smiled, stuffing the mirror into the makeup bag before making it disappear.

Logan gasped, "We aren't supposed to use our powers anymore."

"Technically that rule only applies to you guys. The Dark Sides never agreed to it." Remus corrected.

"Oh," Logan paused, not knowing what to say. He didn't have to continue his statement, because Patton's voice interrupted the conversation from the door.

"You guys may not have agreed to the rule, but while you're here, with us, please refrain from using your powers. The rule is in place for a reason. " Patton gave Remus one of his 'stern dad' looks, silently telling him that if he didn't do this, the invitation to spend Halloween with them would be quickly revoked. The Dark Side rolled his eyes, but shrugged.

"Whatever."

"Anyways, you look amazing, darling! Did you thank Remus?" Patton turned to Logan, looking him up and down and observing his costume. Logan nodded quickly. "Good job. Virgil is almost ready, so you should probably get your stuff together quickly before we head out." Patton instructed.

"Okay, dad." Logan grabbed his phone off of his desk, before heading out of the room.

Remus and Patton followed him out and down the stairs.

Time to go trick or treating.

The boys definitely had fun trick or treating. Patton stuck to Emile and Remy's neighborhood, the people were generally kinder in that area of the town, and they got no more then a few odd looks due to Virgil and Logan's behavior. Since all the interactions were quick, and Logan spoke for both him and Virgil, most people didn't even notice them.

It just looked like they were a few young adults going out because they wanted free candy.

Logan insisted that he didn't need to be watched, so him and Virgil walked a bit ahead of the other four, stopping at houses and collecting candy. Virgil seemed pretty excited, giggling and babbling things to his older brother. Eventually, Patton caught up to them and told them that they should walk home soon.

"But dad-"

"No buts. We've been walking for a while, your bucket is basically full, and everyone is tired." Patton spoke sternly, watching as Logan gave him an annoyed glare. "Lose the attitude, right now. Or that candy will be taken away until you're big again." Patton threatened, raising his eyebrows and watching to see if Logan was gonna push this farther.

"Oh my god," Logan rolled his eyes, holding his basket closer to him. "Sorry."

His apology wasn't genuine, he was just annoyed and wanted his carer to drop the topic.

Patton gave him a look that said 'we'll talk about this later', before directing his attention to Virgil. "Did you have fun tonight, baby?" he asked him. The other three had been trailing behind them, but Roman came forward to take Virgil's hand.

Logan dropped of behind, not wanting to listen to the two caregivers fuss over Virgil, instead matching pace with Janus and Remus. "You okay, Lo?" Remus asked.

Logan shrugged. "Dad's mad at me because of an attitude I don't even have," he complained, seemingly disappointed or upset about something.

Janus looked in front of them as they walked, where Patton was. "I'm sure he isn't mad at you. I think everyone is just a bit tired from walking, everything will probably be good once everybody has gotten the chance to sit down."

"You think?" Logan asked, swinging his basket back and forth a bit. He felt bad. He wasn't trying to upset his caregiver with his annoyance about going home. He was just a little annoyed, and Patton threatening to take his candy just put him in a worse mood. But now, he felt bad for ever being annoyed in the first place.

"Yeah, definitely. I don't think Patton could ever be mad at you," Remus jumped into the conversation, wrapping his arm around Logan's shoulder as they walked. Logan didn't seem convinced, but he went quiet and dropped the subject. Remus and Janus didn't make him talk, simply walking with him as Patton and Roman led the way back home.

Virgil was giggling about something when they got home, following Roman inside. Remus led Logan inside, while Janus paused at the door Patton held open. He made sure that no one else could hear him, speaking quietly. "Can you talk to Logan and make sure he knows you aren't mad at him? I think he feels bad for giving you attitude earlier. Me and Remus tried to comfort him but I don't know if it helped."

Patton's face softened, and he nodded. "Yeah, of course..." he trailed off. "Thanks, for trying to help. It means a lot to me, and I'm sure it does to him too."

Janus smiled, "Of course."

He walked inside without another word. He busied himself with turning on the requested children's movie (Nightmare Before Christmas) while Roman helped Virgil take of his shoes. Patton shut the door behind him, looking around for Logan, who seemed to be gone.

He locked eyes with Remus, glanced upwards, silently telling him that he had gone upstairs. Patton gave a thankful nod before disappearing up the steps.

Patton found Logan in the bathroom, rubbing at his face with a makeup wipe, his eyes a bit teary. He seemed frustrated, and emotional. Logan jumped when he caught Patton's face in the mirror, seeming to register that he left the door open.

He sniffled, "I'm just getting out of my costume." he explained, rubbing at his eyes quickly, casting them downwards. Now, his demeanor was embarrassed, and shy.

Teenagers weren't supposed to cry when their parents were upset with them. That was something Little Logan did. He was to old for this.

"Logan," Patton approached him, taking the makeup wipe out of his hand and pulling him into a hug quickly. Logan rested his chin on Patton's shoulder, not cuddling into him because he didn't wanna get makeup all over his shirt. "Why didn't you tell me you felt so bad, hmm?" he questioned once pulling away.

"You were fussing over Virgil and you seemed upset," Logan shrugged, pulling another makeup wipe from the container and wiping down a section of his face, focusing on the mirror instead of facing his Dad.

Patton gave him an apologetic look through the mirror. "I'm sorry that I was focused on Virgil, I should've paid more attention to you and realized that you weren't okay."

Logan hummed, "It's whatever, I don't need extra attention. I'm a teenager that can take care of myself, I don't even know why I got so upset." he scoffed, seemingly annoyed with himself.

"That's not true, Logan. Biological teenagers still need attention, don't they?"

Logan shrugged. "They do sometimes, yeah." he admitted.

"And they don't completely take care of themselves either. And you shouldn't feel like you have to either," Patton explained. "And you're allowed to feel emotions, baby." he added.

"Every emotion but annoyance, right?" Logan challenged, looking directly into his eyes through the mirror before glancing away, focusing on wiping down his face once again. Patton's mouth fell open. He didn't know how to reply to that.

"Every time I get annoyed, I'm told not to give any 'attitude', even if I don't realize that I'm doing anything wrong!" Logan exclaimed, his voice laced in frustration. "You talk about expressing emotions but the moment it's not positive or something you can fix with a hug and some dad advice, suddenly it's not okay anymore."

Patton seemed hurt by that, but he slowly nodded. He couldn't take this personally right now. He needed to talk this out with Logan, and hopefully set him back up to have a good night. Patton went over to close the bathroom door. "Sit down," he instructed, lowering the toilet lid.

Logan seemed confused, but he took the order quickly. Patton took the container of makeup wipes before sitting down on the edge of the bathtub next to him. Logan turned to face him, not knowing what was happening.

Was Patton mad at him for snapping? Did he hurt his dads feelings? Did he just make everything worse?

He felt like he did.

"I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't express your emotions," Patton pulled another makeup wipe out, cupping the clean part of his face and wiping down another. "You're allowed to be annoyed, or even angry with me. You might not like some choices I make and I understand that, I just don't like it when that happens."

Logan noticed the forced neutral expression on Patton's face, like he was trying to avoid giving away what he was feeling at the moment. "But.." Patton started speaking again, "That doesn't mean I should be so harsh on you when you do get annoyed."

Logan nodded in an understanding way, letting Patton clean his face. Patton continued.

"I'll try to get better about that,l promise. I'm glad you talked to me, though."

"Dad, I didn't mean to hurt you! You're doing amazing, I promise. I just lashed out because I'm emotional and-" Logan started up his quick, panicked rambling, and Patton held his hand up, telling him to stop. Patton started speaking, his face softening a bit.

"It's okay, baby. I did something wrong here, not you, okay? You don't have to feel bad for communicating with me." Patton spoke softly, wiping his face one more time before throwing away the wipe. Logan nodded slowly.

"And just so you know, I was never mad at you." Patton added.

"Really? I got so worked up and emotional for no reason?" Logan seemed shocked. Patton smiled lightly,

"Guess so."

Logan laughed, leaning forward and hugging him. This time, he snuggled into Patton's shoulder. "I'm sorry if I messed tonight up." he mumbled. Patton quickly pushed him away from the hug, his hands on either of Logan's shoulders as he looked him directly in the eyes.

"You messed nothing up, baby. You still had fun trick or treating, right?"

Logan nodded quickly, smiling. "Yeah! Me and Virgil got a lot of candy and people complimented my costume!"

"One emotional part of the night doesn't ruin the rest of it. We agreed to a late bedtime tonight, remember? There's still time to have more fun," Patton assured. Logan nodded.

Patton kissed Logan's forehead before standing up and going over to the door. "Come on, I'm pretty sure Virgil would love to cuddle his amazing big brother right now." He held it open, making way for a laughing Logan to walk through.

Logan's first Halloween spent regressed may not have been absolutely perfect, but spending it with his family still assured that it was still amazing. He couldn't of asked for a better day then Trick or Treating and cuddling with his little brother.

Then getting his makeup done by Remus. Then getting praised by Roman.

Then being with his family.

There were ups and downs to every relationship, including a regressors with their caregiver. But those downs don't erase the good parts. After every valley, there was a hill.

And right now, watching The Nightmare Before Christmas, surrounded by people who cared about him, eating Halloween candy, was definitely one of the hills.

#ts agere #logan agere #little logan #littlelogan #little!logan #middle!logan #middlespacelogan #virgil agere #little virgil #littlevirgil #little!virgil #cg!patton #cg!roman #cg!janus #cg!remus #sanders sides littlespace #sanders sides agere

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theroyalmenagerie · 4 years ago

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Chapter One: Lazy Morning Interrupted

AO3 Link

Chapter Content Warnings: D/s Dynamics, teasing.

__________

The scent of bacon, fresh pastry, and sugary warm blueberries pulled His Royal Highness, Prince Lysander James Reginald von Friedrick Dairune II from sleep. Through the curtains of his bed, he could see a sliver of bright sunlight, and hear the clinking of silverware as breakfast was set up. Stirring lazily, Lysander smiled at the slide of warm fur and skin against him and the instant complaining from his bedmates as he sat up.

“Lyyysss nooooo,” Caleb whined, bright blue eyes peeking out from his copper curls as he reached up to pull Lysander back down, “It’s too early,”

“Much too early,” Anders agreed from the other side, pressing close and placing a languid kiss against Lysander’s shoulder, teeth nipping softly.

Lysander arched into their touch, luxuriating in the press of their lips against his skin. Caleb’s tail wrapped around one of his legs and he moaned, pulling the little fox-fae closer for a heated kiss. Surely breakfast would keep long enough for Lysander to indulge himself at least once.

Or maybe twice.

“On the contrary,” A serious voice called out from the other side of the cavernous room, startling them, “It’s already past noon, and his Highness has an important meeting with the Elurian delegation in two hours, which just might be enough time to get him presentable,”

“Uggghhh Devereaux, would it kill you to, just once, not be a killjoy?” Anders groaned flopping onto his back.

Lysander cursed under his breath, moving to sit up, “He’s right, and I meant to tell you two I’d be busy today when you snuck in last night,”

Caleb tried in vain to keep Lysander down, and when that failed he switched tactics to slide into his lap, pressing his hard cock against the Prince and moaning, “Wouldn't it feel better to postpone your meeting though? Stay here with us, in bed and just rela- HEY!”

Devereaux ignored his outburst and continued to pull the curtains open, allowing the sunlight to flood onto the bed illuminating the trio, “His Highness knows where to find you if he wishes to relax after his duties for the day are fulfilled,”

Caleb pouted shooting a glare to the interrupting Incubus, nuzzling into Lysander, “Lys! Anders! Back me up!”

“Lovely though it would be to steal Lysander away, I have no wish to be lectured again about-” Anders stood his blond tail lazily swaying as he stretched and switched to a mocking parody of Devereaux’s voice, “respecting the importance of His Highness’ station and responsibilities to the kingdom,”

“Perhaps you would not have to be lectured so often if you remembered your place,”

“Devereaux, Anders, please,” Lysander rubbed his forehead, “I had a wonderful night and would like a matching morning, please don’t start bickering,”

“Lyyyssss,”

“I’m sorry sweetheart,” Lysander tilted Caleb’s face up taking his lips in an apologetic kiss, soft and lingering, “I really should start getting ready,”

“Come along, my mate,” Anders pulled him off of Lysander’s lap, “let steal some of those yummy looking scones and go back to our nest, you’ll just have to settle for me taking care of you until Lysander rejoins us,”

“It’s never settling with you, dearest,” Caleb purred but still looked over to Lysander, “you will rejoin us though right? You haven’t changed your mind?”

“I haven’t, I won’t. I should be done before dinner, order a full spread and I’ll join you then,” Lysander promised, standing to see the pair of fox-fae out, not even bothering to wrap himself in a sheet.

There was little need when everyone in the room had done more than just seen him naked many times before.

Besides his outfit would be decided by Devereaux, who was already rifling through his wardrobes. So Lysander bid Anders and Caleb farewell with another kiss for each and then went over to the fireside table laden with his breakfast. It was beautifully arranged, and still hot, a cup of tea set to the side made exactly how he liked. Devereaux didn’t stand for anything less than perfection, and he demanded such from Lysander.

“Would you like tea, sir?” Lysander asked, relaxing into the headspace he had when alone with Devereaux and looking forward to spending time with the Incubi Alpha.

“No.”

Lysander winced at Devereaux’s harsh tone, unsure for a moment what to do. What had seemed no more than a mild annoyance at finding Lysander lazing in bed with the fox-fae pair was clearly more serious than he’d thought.

“Sit. Eat.”

“I-”

“Do not make me repeat myself, your Highness.”

“Yes, sir,” Lysander sat down and began to eat slowly, mind spinning.

The room fell to silence other than the sounds of Devereaux’s searching and Lysander’s uneasy eating. After a few tense moments, Devereaux closed the last of the wardrobes with a sharp click and came over to where Lysander sat, picking at a piece of peppered bacon.

“Did you forget?”

“Forget, sir?” Lysander blinked for a moment before the cause of Devereaux’s displeasure hit him like a mace, “Shit! I’m sorr-”

“Watch your tongue, cursing is unbecoming of one of your station,” Devereaux chided, draping the clothes across the back of an empty chair, “I have no interest in excuses either when the reason for your lapse of memory is plenty evident,”

“They just arrived back last night and Caleb’s heat is due any time now,” Lysander tried to explain anyway, knowing it was useless but needing the incubus to understand he hadn’t meant any disrespect with his actions.

“That is not your duty to-”

“It may not be my duty, but it’s the first time that Caleb has felt comfortable with me joining them for it, that’s why they came last night, to invite me, and frankly I was so honored and… lonely that I forgot yes.”

“You were lonely for a reason,”

“I know,”

“So not only did you disobey me last night, ignoring my orders to remain chaste, you have spent this morning being rude, interrupting me and cursing,”

Lysander winced.

“What am I to do with you, your Highness?”

Lysander’s already low hunger completely evaporated.

He may be a Prince, but years ago when Devereaux had first crossed his path as an advisor to visiting Incubi dignitaries it was clear to both of them that aside from Lysander’s attraction to the Alpha, he had a craving for a firm hand. It hadn’t taken long for Lysander to convince Devereaux to take him to bed for a night. What had started as an intense night then bled into the next and the next.

Devereaux as he’d promised had taken Lysander in hand, pulling pleasure from the Prince that Lysander didn’t know he could have. While part of that could be attributed to the incubi’s naturally heightened sexual prowess, part of it was that never before had someone dared demand that the Prince submit. Despite the fact that he was an omega, no human concubine would ever think of trying such a thing, not that many had the chance to try.

Lysander never had much desire for the humans that filled his siblings' harems and had begged to be in his, to begin with. They were all so simpering and bland, hiding any sort of personality in a bid to win a place within Lysander’s harem while refusing to even attempt to truly get to know him. To add insult to injury, the few he’d tried out of loneliness and need had balked at any attempt by Lysander to control their encounters, so certain that all the omega Prince should want is a knot while being panderingly praised to.

So for many years, Lysanders bed was rarely filled. After Devereaux so thoroughly upended the Prince’s world with the fulfillment of his basest desires Lysander had spent weeks convincing the incubus to stay instead of returning home with the delegation. Promises of riches, status as the Prince’s own concubine, an easy life, Lysander promised it all, desperate not to be left alone and unsatisfied.

Devereaux nearly said no until Lysander admitted how badly he needed the incubus to stay for more than just his own pleasure, how he wanted to learn from his hand not just to submit but to one day make others submit as he also longed to. It took a promise to take Devereaux’s training seriously, to heed his advice and his orders when issued, to get him to stay.

It was the best thing that had happened in Lysander’s life. Under Devereaux’s tutelage Lysander better understood himself and his desires, and without that Lysander would not be as fulfilled as he was now nor would he have the menagerie he was building of lovers that not only suited his ranging desires but were friends and confidants outside of bed.

It had been a while since Lysander screwed up this badly, and he hated the feeling of disappointing Devereaux not only as his Dom but his dear friend and mentor.

“I don’t know, I am sorry truly and I accept the consequences of my actions whatever they may be, sir,”

Devereaux sighed, “I will ponder it while you attend your duties, for now, we need to get you dressed and that hair tamed, you know the Elurian’s will not look kindly on you being late let alone disheveled,”

Lysander just nodded and stood, knowing even as Devereaux was upset with him he would still take control of overseeing the Prince getting dressed. Devereaux quite enjoyed dressing Lysander up, it had been one of the first bits of submission he’d demanded from the omega. His enjoyment came from the ritual of the act itself but more importantly the rush from having such control over the Prince, one of the most powerful people in the kingdom, that how he was presented to others was of his choosing.

It was very clinical compared to how it would otherwise usually go, however; there were no lingering caresses or sprinkled praise for his stillness and compliance and form. No teasing rolling of his nipples before pulling tight the corsetry that kept him flat throughout the day. Just quick, efficient movements of pulling and lacing and tucking.

The clothes were - as always - well picked, better than Lysander would ever have put together. The tunic’s deep green hue echoed those in Lysander’s hazel eyes and matched the stitching of the soft leather pants. Then there was a richly embroidered vest with gold buttons and matching capelet that made one think of nature, knee-high shiny black boots, and the simple gold circlet that was Lysander’s crown would finish it once his thick black curls were tamed. It was a good pick for meeting with the Elurian’s who hailed from deep within the forests of Mylsavar, it could evoke pleasant thoughts of their home.

Much better than the silver and blue idea Lysander had thought he’d go with. Lysander did try when he dressed himself, but there was something about Devereaux’s sense of style that always made him feel more put together and impressive.

Devereaux’s touch soften a bit as he finished dressing Lysander and moved to carefully comb through the Prince’s curls, braiding and arranging them into the careful half-up-do that he preferred on Lysander, as it emphasized his sharp cheekbones and in the Alpha’s own words, “Entices one to pay attention that they may stay in the presence of such beauty, and encourage them to agree so they please you,”

“There we go, that’s much better,” Devereaux said after placing the crown, careful to make sure it was straight and secure, “and you don’t even have to rush to make your meeting, your Highness,”

“Thank you, sir,” Lysander bit his lip, “and again I am sorry,”

“And you will be forgiven once you receive your punishment,”

“I… do you want me tonight?”

“No. You’ve already promised your company to those incorrigible foxes,” Devereaux reminded him gently, turning with him towards the door and walking out with him, “I will not make you break your promise, tomorrow morning will suffice provided Caleb does not begin his heat,”

“If he does…”

“Then enjoy satisfying his heat, do not forget to take a dose of your suppressant before you join them, and see me the moment it is over,”

“Thank you, S-Devereaux,”

“You are welcome, your Highness, if you have a need of me I’ll be in the gardens,” With that Devereaux faced Lysander and gave him a small smile and a soft touch to his cheek before turning leaving the Prince to walk the rest of the way to his meeting by himself.

Lysander wanted to scream, this was the third set of meetings this year with the Elurian’s and they were no closer to having a trade agreement that satisfied both nations than they were before the first. To make matters worse this whole bit of politics was far from Lysander’s usual duties, he much preferred being charged with running more internal logistics rather than ones that required diplomacy with the other nations.

Give him an infrastructure project to plan, tax laws to adjust, anything but meeting with foreign dignitaries and having to navigate the complicated social interactions to avoid war.

“I understand your concerns, but until the solstice harvest is over even I am not allowed in the groves,” Lysander tried to calm the increasingly irate delegates.

“How can we be assured of your ability to fill the needs we have if we cannot confirm that your groves are producing the quantity that you claim?”

“If you are willing to wait until-”

“We have already waited! Six months!”

“I am aware, but the first party you sent to us were invited to tour the grove when such a visit was acceptable and they said that was unnecessary, by the time you returned demanding access we’d reached the season where only the Hyla were allowed inside,”

“Surely your gods will not strike you down for allowing us to simply see the grove, we need not touch anything,”

“The fact the grove is blessed is why you wish to trade with us, please do not then disrespect our beliefs with demands we cannot concede to,” Lysander struggled to keep his tone calm and pleasant, to draw every bit of patience he had on not starting an incident, “You are more than welcome to come after the harvest,”

“It will be too late after the harvest to get everything in order to have the Kysri brought back to the Elra this year, that would leave us till next year before we can have its aid,”

On and on it went for hours, too tense to even have food brought in. With neither side willing or able to concede no progress could be made. By the time they had to call the negotiations for the day Lysander had a pounding headache and all he wanted was a stiff drink and a tongue buried in his cunt.

“We will have to table this for now, I’m afraid I have other appointments I must keep tonight,”

“Our convoy leaves tomorrow,” the head delegate hissed, “What are we to do then?”

“If you are still interested, as we are, in opening trade between our nations I suggest you come back after the harvest season to see the yield, we are more than willing to work with you to ensure if you are pleased that a shipment of Kysri can be brought back with you. I know that is less than you were hoping for but it would ensure aid to some of your people at least,”

That led to another hour of debating before Lysander managed to convince them to leave him be, and as the last of them left Lysander finally let out the frustrated groan that would have to do because he didn’t feel like explaining why he was screaming to his guards.

“Well that certainly was something,” a low, dark voice drawled out from behind Lysander suddenly.

“Sebastian! Goodness, you nearly gave me a heart attack,” Lysander spun around to see Sebastian melt out of the shadows, bright red eyes shining.

“Goodness? You’ve been spending too much time with Devereaux” he snorted, giving Lysander a heated once over, lingering on the exposed length of his neck.

“He has a point, you know, about my speech needing to represent my station,”

Sebastian just rolled his eyes, “Way too much time,”

“Well at least he wants to spend time with me,” Lysander huffed, trying to ignore the twinge in his chest as he addressed the vampire, “If I didn’t know better I’d say you sound jealous,”

“Of that better-than-thou priss? Never.” Sebastian stepped forward, crowding against the Prince, “Was he? When he found you in bed with the foxes?”

Lysander blushed a little but didn’t move, looking up at him deliberately, “Do I even want to know how you know that?”

“Well he abandoned his precious garden hours early today to go pace in the library, and you still smell of them,” Sebastian leaned down and ran his nose down Lysander’s neck and following it with a featherlight kiss against his heartbeat causing the Prince to shiver, “It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why his panties are in a bunch,”

“Devereaux doesn’t get jealous, you know he doesn’t care for me that way, he was just… disappointed… I disobeyed him,” Lysander breathed out, pulse-pounding and heat curling low from the presence of the Alpha who moved so his hands rested against Lysander’s hips.

Sebastian tsked, his warm breath teasing against the Prince’s neck, “Naughty boy, you know better,”

“I know,” Lysander couldn’t help tilting his head up further.

“Pity it’s Devereaux’s right to discipline you for it,” Sebastian let his teeth scrape against Lysander’s pulse point, teeth aching to sink in as the omega’s arousal heightened and that wonderful scent of warm honey and cloves filled the air around him, “Is that where you’re heading now?”

“I… Uhm...”

“What was that?”

Lysander took a shaky breath, trying to clear the arousal from his mind long enough to answer, “I’m rejoining Caleb and Anders, actually,”

“Oh? Are you joining for all of Caleb’s heat? Going to play Alpha with a fake knot while wishing it was you hot and fertile and being bred like a good little omega?”

“I-I’m going to join them, yes,” Lysander swallowed hard, “are you jealous now?”

Sebastian chuckled and straightened up, leaving Lysander feeling bereft, “Oh no, little Prince, not at all, I hope you enjoy your little game,”

It was a lie but the little Prince didn’t need to know the growing possessiveness that burned in the back of Sebastian’s mind. He had no right to those feelings. Sebastian had known better than to begin having them in the first place, but the little Prince was so addicting, so intriguing, he hadn’t been able to convince himself to leave him behind yet.

Lysander was more than a little flustered, wanting to reach out and pull Sebastian back or maybe just drop to his knees and beg. Instead, he cleared his throat, “I will, now if you don’t need anything else? I’m already late,”

“Go, have fun Lysander, I’ll catch up with you when you’re not so busy,” Sebastian turned to leave looking over his shoulder before fading back into the shadow at Lysander breathing hard and still blushing and tried hard to ignore the pang in his chest that he wasn’t taking the omega to bed instead.

#The Royal Menagerie #Terato

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ghostboybabies · 4 years ago

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little ghost boy || [JATP Agere/CGLRE]- “Panic Attacks and Secrets” (Chapter 8)

A/N: been planning *this* plot point for a while. Hope y'all enjoy.

Reggie panics and involuntarily regresses after a nightmare, Alex meets up with Willie at a skatepark when band practice is cancelled, and Reggie makes a big decision.

Reggie wanted Luke.

Now.

He couldn't breathe. Or at least, it felt that way. He didn't remember what was so scary about his dream at first, all he knew is that it upset him.

Tears ran down his face as he sobbed, sniffling. He sat up, taking in his surroundings. He was in Julie's bed. He didn't recall why, but he was glad he had the stuffed bear Julie gave him for comfort.

He knew that he was very little but he didn't care. This was to much for him. And he needed Luke.

"Reggie, it's time to get up for band practice-"

Reggie heard Julie's voice as she opened the door, speaking casually until she got a glance of him. "Oh my god, Reg! What happened?" She shut her door behind her, and quickly came to sit next to him on the bed.

She had let him nap in her room because he had stayed up late the night before doing something, planning to come wake him up before band practice.

Reggie shook his head, closing in on himself and squeezing the bear. "Mama!" Reggie cried, babbling over his words. He panicked, his breathing becoming more quickened and panicky.

"Baby, I need you to breathe for me. Like me, okay?" Julie continued to breathe in deeply, and then out. Reggie nodded, attempting to follow her lead. She didn't care that he was little at a bad time, she just wanted him to be okay. Julie didn't ask for an explanation, nor did she question what was going on. In the moment, she just did everything she could to help him calm down.

She continued on, muttering praise and reassurance until his breathing was more level. "Bad dream, mama! Scary and I wan Luke..." he whined, still sniffling.

"It's okay, baby," Julie opened her arms, letting him hug her. He snuggled into her chest, hugging her tightly. "And I'll see if I can get Luke for you, yeah?"

"Band pwactice?" Reggie pulled away, tilting his head. "Gotta be big."

"No, you don't. You just had some sort of panic attack and that's what this is for, remember? To deal with your mental health and emotions."

Reggie nodded, and Julie continued. "We don't have a gig for a week, we'll come up with another time to practice. And...I'll come up with something to tell Alex. You just play with your stuffie, okay?"

Reggie picked the bear back up from the bed, hugging it and nodding. Julie's breathing exercise and affection helped comfort him a bit, but he still didn't feel well. He wanted Luke.

Luke's comfort seemed so important in the moment due to the contents of his dream. The nightmare made him afraid of losing Luke, and he needed to know that he wouldn't.

Julie leaned forward and kissed his forehead. Reggie hugged the stuffed animal, trying to focus on keeping his breathing level for the time being, watching his Mama leave the room.

"Julie!" Luke cheered once Julie entered the studio, dropping his smile when he saw how serious she looked. "Where's Reggie?"

"I need to talk to you," Julie said, in a serious tone that scared him a bit. . Luke lifted his guitar over his head, going over and setting it on his stand.

"I'll be back." He told Alex, following Julie out of the studio and leaving the blonde very confused. Once they were outside, and the garage doors were shut behind him, he spoke aloud, questioning what was going on.

"What's up, Jules?"

"Reggie had a panic attack," Julie sighed, seemingly worried. "He said something about a bad dream and he's very little and he's asking for you. Can we cancel band practice? Can you please go spend some time with him?" Julie pleaded. She was really worried.

"Of course...I'll tell Alex that Reggie had a nightmare but leave out the details. He used to get them pretty bad, about his parents and stuff, and he'd be sensitive after. I'm sure he won't think anything of it," Luke decided, nodding. "I'll talk to Reggie, and then we can all do something as a distraction for him, okay?"

"Sounds like a plan." Julie confirmed, still on-edge.

"Hey," Luke spoke softly to her, picking up on her stress. "He's gonna be okay. We'll figure this out."

Julie hummed, nodding. "Yeah...thanks for that." She thanked him for the comfort, and Luke smiled.

"Of course."

"Nightmares? I feel so bad...I thought those went away," Alex frowned, worried for his friend. "Can I see him? I used to help him when he had them when we were alive."

"No!" Julie said, immediately. She awkwardly chuckled, "We got this. You go hang out with Willie or something, and we can all hang out later tonight." she compromised. Julie understood that Alex was worried and tried to come up with a solution that would allow him to see Reggie, without exposing him for being an age regressor.

"O-okay, yeah. You sure you got this?" Alex looked to Luke, who nodded. "When I come back, can we talk all about something?" Alex asked.

"Uh, yeah. Whatever you want, just not right now." Luke wasn't really worried about whatever he was planning to bring up, just trying to get him out so that he could go help his baby.

Alex nodded, setting his drumsticks down and stepping away from the drum set. Luke gave him a soft smile, before poofing out as Julie exited through the door. Alex didn't know what was up, but he was worried.

It seemed like Luke was always trying to keep him out of the house, and while he loved spending time with his boyfriend, he was missing his friends too. But he was kinda thankful about it, because they never questioned why he was gone all the time, they just seemed to be glad that he wasn't in the house to discover whatever they were keeping from him.

They were hiding something from him, but he was hiding something too. It wasn't his secret to tell anyways. It was Willie's.

He figured that he should go check on the boy in question anyways. With everything going on, Willie was always pretty stressed. Hiding a relationship from the person who owns your soul will do that to you. He poofed out, appearing on a bench at a empty skate park.

How long would it be before it hit them that their secrets were exactly the same? At least, Willie and Reggie's were.

"Luke!" Reggie made grabby hands towards his friend the moment he appeared in the room. Luke came forward, leaning down to hug him without making him get up from the bed. Reggie cuddled into his chest. "Scary dream, Luke! You didn't wanna be friends anymore- and Julie left too. And Alex-" he started rambling, working himself back to tears again.

"Baby, none of us would ever leave you, okay? I know nightmares can be scary but they're not real. " Luke assured, kissing the top of Reggie's head softly. "None of us are going anywhere, I promise you."

He let go of Reggie, letting him settle back into the bed. "I heard you kinda panicked. Are you feeling okay?" Luke sat on the bed next to him, hearing the door open as Julie entered. She didn't interrupt, closing the door behind her and taking her spot on the other side of Reggie as he replied.

"Still sad." he mumbled, shaking his head. "Don't wanna lose you," he said.

"I know, baby. You won't," Luke repeated. Julie seemed concerned. "Do you wanna tell Mama what the dream was about?"

Reggie turned to Julie, bringing his thumb to his lip. "Lost Luke, and yous, and Alex. Didn't wanna be friends anymore," he pouted.

"Poor baby," Julie opened his arms, letting him hug her. "Luke's right, we're not going anywhere. I can promise you that, Little Prince."

Reggie hummed, cuddling into her too. "Hey, Rockstar?" Luke asked after a minute of just them hugging. Reggie pulled away from Julie, tilting his head as he looked over at him. "Will a movie make you feel a bit better?" Luke asked.

Reggie shrugged. "We could watch Winnie the Pooh!" Julie suggested, in a excited tone that made Reggie really wanna watch it. He pouted though, shaking his head. "Why not, Flower?"

"Makes me littler," he mumbled shyly, his face a little pink.

Luke gave an amused smile. "And exactly how big are you right now?" he questioned in a teasing tone.

"Dunno," Reggie pouted. "Not a baby," he decided.

"Hmm, well...does Winnie the Pooh make you happy?" Julie interrupted, joining back in on the conversation. Reggie nodded slowly. "Then what does it matter if it triggers a younger headspace? You're allowed to be little, even if 'little' is very young."

Reggie seemed hesitant to agree, but Julie leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead, distracting him from whatever he was going to say. "I'll set up the show. Julie, is there any way to get more blankets so that the baby is more comfy? We can build a little pillow fort!"

Reggie bounced it place. "Yeah, Mama, can we?"

Julie rolled her eyes, playfully glaring at Luke, chuckling a bit. "Yeah, I'll see what I can do. Reggie, you can be my little helper!"

"That's a very important job, mister." Luke said playfully. Reggie nodded, seeming determined to help Julie with whatever she needed. Julie stood up, reaching out her hand for Reggie to take.

What Reggie needed right now was a distraction. And Julie and Luke were providing just that. They always seemed to know what he needed and how to help him.

And Reggie would always be thankful for that.

Alex poofed onto a bench in an empty skate park, looking around for Willie.

"Alex!" Willie cheered, stopping his skateboard in front of the bench. He sat down next to him. Alex still had no idea how they were always able to correctly guess where the other was most of the time. It was weird.

"Hey, Willie," Alex chuckled at his excitement. "How are you?"

"Not little, if that's what you're getting at," Willie told him. "Actually though, I'm pretty okay at the moment! I've been skating and just hanging out. You?"

"Well, I was supposed to practice with the band today but then they cancelled it because of Reggie. He was pretty shaken up after a nightmare, they wouldn't let me see him for some reason." Alex explained.

"It sounds like they're hiding something related to Reggie from you. Do you have any ideas on what it could be?" Willie frowned, sitting back in the bench and getting settled.

"Actually, I think I might."

"Go on," Willie seemed interested.

"At first I thought it was just a weird Reggie thing- but on Halloween night, I caught Reggie sleeping and sucking his thumb. I-i think he might be like you," Alex seemed hesitant, like he wasn't completely sure.

"I mean, I think that's possible. You said that he deals with anxiety too, right? And that he didn't have the best childhood?"

Alex nodded in affirmation. "Those are both two things people can use age regression to deal with."

Alex nodded again, "There's so many other things too. I was thinking it in the back of my mind since you told me about you a month ago, but I didn't know for sure. He will disappear with either Julie or Luke, or both, for extended periods of time. Whenever I come home, one of them will distract me until the other two come back, and Reggie always is kinda shy."

"Like I am when I come out of littlespace," Willie connected.

"Yeah, I don't know, but I do think it's possible. Either way, I'm gonna ask them about it tonight, see if I can figure out what they're keeping from me." Alex ran his fingers through his hair. "But while I'm here, do you wanna do something?"

"I-i know I said I wasn't little-"

"You can be if you want." Alex cut him off, smiling at him. Willie smiled back, nodding.

"Okay. Cool. Can we go to the park?" Willie was thankful. He could only ever feel comfortable being little away from the club, and it was much easier to be a kid when you had someone to play with.

"Of course."

"Luke! Look at all the blankies we got!" Reggie giggled, coming over to Julie's bed and dumping a pile of soft blankets on the bed. He looked so proud of himself for helping, even though it was obvious that Julie carried more and did all the work.

"Whoa! Those are a lot! You must be so strong, baby."

Reggie blushed a little bit. He was still getting used to the praise thing. Instead of pointing out things he did wrong, or getting mad at him, they made a point to tell him what he did well. While softly correcting and helping him improve in spots he could do better. Instead of 'You're not good enough', it was 'You're amazing, and we're gonna help you be even better'.

"Now you get to help me set this up! I don't know how we're gonna do a fort though..." she trailed off, looking around her room. "We could pull the chair over here, and use the stool to create a roof? Just drape the blanket across it and set up on the floor?"

They eventually figured out the blanket fort thing, setting it up on the ground. They all cuddled up inside of it, Reggie sitting between his friends with the computer on his lap. Reggie was definitely right about the show making him littler.

He was sucking on his thumb and cuddling both his bear and Luke. Julie had been the one mainly taking care of Reggie the past few times he regressed, and he seemed to want Luke now. That dream spooked him, and out of the two people he trusted, he wanted the one he knew longer. Julie didn't take offence to that, just glad that he was feeling better.

Reggie kept giggling at the movie, but he eventually fell back asleep against Luke. Luke reached forward,pressing the spacebar on the laptop to pause the show once he was sure the baby was sleeping. "We should let him get some more sleep. He can stay in the pillow fort, though." Luke suggested.

Julie nodded, "The crying probably tired him back out. We can let him sleep for a while and hopefully he'll be big when he wakes up."

Luke nodded a bit in response, closing the laptop and setting it aside, working to carefully lay Reggie down without waking him up. He stirred a bit at the last minute, whining. "No go.." Reggie mumbled sleepily. He fell back asleep basically immediately, but Luke's heart melted.

"Julie, he's so adorable-"

"I know, but if you spend a million years cooing over him, we're never gonna come up with something to tell Alex."

Luke rolled his eyes, proceeding to climb out of their little fort, followed by Julie.

Little did they know, there was no need to lie to Alex. They'll figure it out eventually.

"I have to go home, kiddo. I'm sorry," Alex looked at the pouty kid in front of him, frowning a bit.

"But Awex!" Willie whined. "Wanna keep playin'."

Alex smiled a bit at his mispronunciation of his name, "I know, Little One. But we can always play later, right?"

Willie nodded, casting his eyes down. "Mkay. I miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Willie." Alex opened his arms, letting the little hug him. Little Willie had an older headspace age then Little Reggie, for sure, but they were alike in many ways. When they eventually met, and interacted in littlespace, it was undoubtedly going to be an absolutely adorable sight to see.

But of course, there were many things that needed to happen before they got there. Many secrets to be told. Many conversations to be had.

"Can you be a big kid for me, buddy? I know big Willie can take care of himself, I don't know about you, though."

Willie pouted, but he nodded nonetheless. "Be big after you leave, pwomise." he held out his pinky childishly.

Alex gave an amused smile, wrapping his pinky around his. "I know it's hard to pull yourself out of headspace. It's okay."

After a moment of silence, Alex leaned forward, kissing Willie's forehead before smiling at him. "I'll see you later."

Willie hummed, stepping back as he poofed out. Willie frowned, sad that he was gone. He stepped back onto the playground, going over to the swings and taking a seat.

He had to be big before heading back to the club. Sometimes, Caleb wasn't the nicest person about the more childish part of him. Only sometimes, when things at the club weren't doing well and there was a lot going on. And Willie knew he had been pretty stressed after failing to possess a teenage boy for more then a few day. And getting yelled at for not being able to understand orders wasn't something on his 'to-do' list for today.

He was glad he got to spend some time with Alex, though.

"There, all the pillow fort stuff is put away. I think Alex will be heading back soon, though." Luke said, looking over to a nervous Reggie as he set one of Julie's pillows back in place on her bed.

"Are you sure you wanna tell him? We can come up with a lie." Julie offered, coming to sit next to him. Reggie shook his head a bit.

"I'm okay. I-i'm sure about this. Nervous out of my mind, but sure."

"Okay, Reg. Just let us know if you change your mind." Luke told him, sitting down as well.

"I will." Reggie assured, biting on his lip and bouncing his knee. He was very nervous. This was the first time he'd be willingly telling someone, and it was terrifying. He could still back out, but he didn't think he wanted to. He trusted Alex, and he knew somewhere, deep down, that he'd probably be okay with it.

The most he'd do is tease him playfully like Luke did. But it was still scary.

Alex walked through the door, talking about how he had gone to the studio to find them first. Reggie waited until he was done with his rambling, speaking up nervously.

"Alex, I have something to tell you..."

Was he really doing this?

A/N: Reblogs and asks with your thoughts/reactions to this chapter are very much appreciated! Thank you for reading!

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wherevermyway · 4 years ago

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step out! do what you want (chapter ten)

pairings: reader/bang chan/han jisung, bang chan/han jisung side pairing: seo changbin/lee minho (referenced) rating: explicit | 18+ warnings (read please!): big fat warning for ambiguous HINTS of suicidal ideation, character deaths, mental instability, post-traumatic stress, profanity, use of firearms, graphic depictions of violence (fist fight, gunfight), blood, lots of smoking this chapter, mentions of sex, mentions of drug use, angst, drug dealer!au/organized crime!au. also, don’t drive this fast on the highway. word count: about 9,300 also on my ao3 here chapter/series navigation

chapter ten: je vois la fin avant le début | i see the end before it starts

recommended tracks: black swan by bts, can’t you see me? by tomorrow x together we go by stray kids, 777 by joji, the end/undead by hollywood undead and zero 9:36, simon says by nct 127, turn back time by wayv, begin by bts, tôt ou tard by eli rose, ew by joji, another day by stray kids. playlist can be found here.

note: I can’t believe this is almost done (thank god). I’m gonna warn you one more time: this story is dark as fuck and, if you thought chapter nine was bad, ten is also bad, and eleven is worse. eleven is going to have really triggering content (very explicitly labelled in several places) in it so please don’t hate me. I’m also turning off taglists for these last two chapters because I’m not comfortable tagging people due to the content.

disclaimer: any reference to persons in this work of fiction are purely coincidental. the characters referenced from Stray Kids are interpretations loosely based on their personalities in the group and do not represent the real people behind the personas. if this, or any of the content included in the warnings above make you uncomfortable, please stop reading now.

side note: for the love of minho’s cats, don’t mix party drugs or drugs with alcohol.

It would seem that, even though you’re back in the real world, returning to reality is proving to be difficult. Since returning to Christopher’s apartment, you’ve had a couple of panic attacks that you felt made both Christopher and Jisung questioned their relationship with you. Most of the time, things were fine, but there were moments and entire days where they treated you like you were a fragile piece of pottery with a big, neon warning label slapped on it that said “Danger! Will shatter if mishandled!” in fat, ugly, blocky, black characters.

After screaming and crying at your therapist for an hour and a half, you decided that you wanted to be alone and would take an alternative route home, sneaking out the back door so that Christopher didn’t see you as he waited out front in his car. You peeked through the glass front doors, seeing his car parked there, right on time. It was hard to make out details from so far away, but it looked like he was staring at his phone, mindlessly scrolling along.

Perfect.

You smiled to yourself as you turned away from the front door. The last time you were here, you recognized a service entrance towards the back of the building that appeared to be unlocked. Timidly, you make your way towards it and jiggle the handle. The door popped open with ease, and you walked through, quickly bolting through the alleyway and make your way towards the Mojeon bridge in Cheonggyecheon.

The walk to the bridge wasn’t very long, so you took the long way, weaving in and out of various backroads and alleyways. You loved taking in the environment of small shopping stalls and the scurrying of busy folk. What you had enjoyed the most was the ambient noises of the city life around you. It was night and day in comparison to the past five or so months had been like, trapped in the hospital, then trapped in Christopher’s apartment, leaving only to go to your thrice-weekly therapy appointments.

It made sense why you felt so lonely. Christopher had been keeping himself busy, constantly coming to bed not long before the sun came up. You knew he wasn’t purposefully avoiding you or Jisung, but something about it didn’t sit well with you, likely because it felt like he was just avoiding handling the loss of Changbin, now stuck with all of the stress of dealing with the family.

Jisung had to have been feeling it, too. Neither of them were going out on collection runs or handling deals; they had left it to Seungmin and Jeongin, as well as just sending jobs back to the hyung-nim. Jisung would occasionally spend a few late nights in the studio with Christopher, and he would always come back to bed more frustrated than he was before he went to go assist his superior.

There was one night a few weeks ago where you went to lay down early, settling into a book that you weren’t really committed to reading, but what the fuck else did you have to do, cramped up in this apartment? All three of you were tense from being cooped up inside, save for your therapy appointments. Jisung and Christopher were arguing about something, their voices travelling through the open studio door, bouncing around the open living room and kitchen, finally making its way in through the bedroom door.

It was impossible to completely make out what they were arguing about, but you really didn’t care at this point. Everything was all about hierarchy and other bureaucratic nonsense that had been completely upended with Changbin’s death. Jisung came angrily padding into the bedroom, a scowl on his face as he grumbled and flopped down on to the bed face-first. He let out a long, drawn out, frustrated groan into the blanket.

“You gonna be okay, Sungie?” You put your book on the nightstand, adjusting your position so that you’re able to run a calming hand through the younger man’s hair. “Sounded like you two were disagreeing about something again.”

Jisung huffs, then rolls over onto his back. “I'm never gonna be cut out to be a leader, am I?” He turns his head slightly to look up at you. “Chan-hyung has a hard enough time, and I never wanted to do this, but now I don’t have a choice.”

You roll your fingers through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp, and smile at him. “You would be a good leader if you wanted be, but I think this entire situation has been stressful on everyone.”

A scoff leaves Jisung’s lips as he turns to face you full-on. “You’re starting to sound like a therapist.”

“Go figure,” you sarcastically grumble as you roll your eyes.

“You’d be good at it,” Christopher’s voice travels through the doorway, startling both you and Jisung. He walks into the room and worms his way around both of you on the bed. “I’m sorry,” he sighs out, “I’ve been so stressed this week with all of the exchanges of power and sheer amount of work that needs to be done. Jisung,” he sits up on his heels, draping his face over his junior. “I’m sorry if I made it seem like I was mad at you. There’s no excuse for that kind of behaviour and I’m sorry.”

Jisung softly smiles, grabbing Christopher’s face with both of his hands. “You can be a real jerk sometimes,” he croons softly, “but I know you don’t mean it, that you’re not taking it out on me, y’know? It’s been a long, chaotic few months. We’ve all had our moments of panic, and you’re unfairly shouldered with handling the family almost completely by yourself. “

Christopher sighs, turning his head to look at you before he grabs you by the waist and pulls you into an embrace, both of you unceremoniously flopping onto your sides. “How about I ignore all of the stuff with the family tomorrow,” he says, pulling you up against him tightly with one arm, reaching out to Jisung with the other. “We can have a day with just the three of us. Get some bad takeout, watch horrible movies, just kind of have a lazy day around the house?”

“I like that idea,” Jisung excitedly nods, then turns to look at you. “What do you think, bunny?”

You were happy with the idea, but you couldn’t find yourself to share the same level of enthusiasm that Jisung did, like you would in the Before Time, as your therapist coined it. Before, you would have jumped at the thought, with both you and Jisung likely driving Christopher somewhat mad. But now, things were just muted and toned down. Mellowed down, like food you would eat when you had the stomach flu. Everything now just emotionally felt like lukewarm, runny juk, when you were used to explosions of flavour and texture on your emotional palette.

“You okay, baby?” Christopher sits up, turning to look down at you. The expressions on his face and Jisung’s face fall flat with concern and nervousness. “Are you going to that headspace again?”

Suddenly, you come back to your senses. You couldn’t have them worry about you, after all. There was already enough, much more important stuff for them to worry about. Honestly, you were just some woman who got strung along for a wild ride, and now had to deal with something a bit more difficult than a modelling shoot being cancelled. You could handle this.

“I’m fine,” you say with a fake smile plastered on your face. That was one good thing that came naturally to you because of modelling: faking emotions well enough, for a short period of time, faking it so well that anyone would believe you. “I just got distracted with thinking about what we could do.”

Jisung flushes, clearly misinterpreting your intention. “Oh yeah,” he breathes out, “it’s been a while since the three of us…” his voice trails off as he alternates looking at you and Christopher, the blush on his face deepening as he awkwardly shifts around.

The blond-haired man rolls his eyes and scoffs. “Yeah, but,” he sighs, “that’s okay. It’ll happen naturally when we’re ready for it to happen, right?”

Luckily for you that night, the three of you were able to share an intimate moment together for the first time in literal months. It was fine and was fun, albeit muted like everything else lately, nowhere near how chaotic it was at the beginning of your relationship. At least you could get them off of your back for a little while longer.

As you reached the touristy area of Cheonggyecheon (when did you get here?), your phone buzzed twice in your pocket and pulled you from your hazy daydream. Nervously, you pull the phone out of your pocket, giving it a quick glance. Nearly all of the texts on your phone are from Christopher, unsurprisingly. There was nobody else, only Christopher and Jisung. Those were the only people you had now; everyone else either abandoned you, hated you, were outside of Korea, or had died.

16:47 | Running late? Figured you’d be done by now. 16:58 | Where are you? it's been a half hour 17:05 | seriously baby where are you?

His texts start to seem more panicked, his texting habits clearly more frantic.

It’s been over an hour since your appointment ended, and your phone won’t stop buzzing. You jam it back into your hoodie’s pocket and continue to ignore the barrage of calls from Christopher. He clearly got a hold of Jisung, because you’ve also started receiving texts and phone calls from him. A smirk creeps up on your face as you reach the Mojeon bridge. You quietly pace up to the middle of the bridge and poke your head over the railing.

It happens without even thinking. Almost mechanically, you take your phone out of your pocket and drop it down into the stream below you. It was almost ironic, honestly, that this was right above the spot where you got shot during Changbin’s funeral. It was a good area for your phone to die alongside where your sanity did.

You can’t help but cackle at yourself, earning some choice stares from passersby. There was no rhyme or reason to why you were doing this, but it felt good. The rushing water beneath the bridge was oddly calming as you stared at it over the railing. There was always something about the water that helped you feel grounded and calm. With all of this chaos around you, you needed something to stay constant.

As crazy as it sounded, the thought of jumping into the stream and letting it carry you out to the Han river did pass through your brain, but you managed to talk yourself out of it. “No,” you say aloud to yourself, “I couldn’t do that.”

The screeching of tires from the street adjacent to the walkway pulls you out of your thoughts. You turn your head towards the noise and see Christopher jump out of his car, haphazardly parked halfway on the sidewalk. He runs to you, yelling your name a couple of times, a horror-stricken expression on his face.

Your heart is about to explode out of your chest as you see him running at you. Part of your brain is telling you to run, but it would appear that your muscles have forgotten how to operate themselves.

Christopher slams into you, causing you to take a couple of steps back as you narrowly avoid being knocked down on to the concrete. His arms wrap around you so tightly, you’re afraid he’s going to pop your lungs. “Oh my god,” he cries out, “oh my god, where the hell have you been?” He puts a hand on the back of your head, gripping your hair, lifting his head to kiss yours with several small pecks, and you can feel his body twitch as he starts to cry.

“A walk,” you manage to quietly squeak out, “I wanted to go for a walk.”

Christopher pulls back, releasing you from his embrace and taking a step backwards. “A walk?” His bloodshot, glossy eyes open wide, his face red as tears streak down his face, and he shakes his head. “Why didn’t you just tell me? I would have -“

“I’m smothered,” you flatly say, not really able to allow yourself to process any emotions. “You and Jisung both have both been treating me like I’m just going to fall apart if you even look at me.” Christopher stares at you in disbelief as the pedestrians around you pointedly avoid getting close.

“Lover’s quarrel?” A hushed whisper travels on the wind.

“Youth always out here with their petty drama,” another whisper follows.

You and Christopher stand there, staring at each other for a while. He eventually runs his hands through his hair, turning to look down the stream as he wipes the tears off of his face. “A walk,” he whispers, repeating back to himself. “Smothered.” He sighs heavily and turns back to you, his brows furrowed in frustration.

“I thought you had been kidnapped, or that you ended up dead somewhere. Do you not understand that there are people out there that want us to suffer or, god forbid, kill us? You were shot right here the last time we were here, for fuck’s sake.” The tears continue to fall down his face as he puts his hands on his hips. “I don’t want you to feel like this anymore. I don’t know how to help you with that, but,” he pauses, dropping his hands from his hips as he takes a step closer to you, “if I could take away all of your pain, I would do it in an instant, even if I had to take it all on myself.” He pulls you into his chest by your hips and wraps his arms around your waist, a bit more gently this time.

“I can’t do this without you. You, me, Jisung: we’ve all gone through so much shit in the past six months and we need each other.” His phone starts ringing, but both of you deliberately ignore it. “Once we’ve dealt with Minho and Hyunjin, Jisung and I are gonna leave the family. I’ve got some connections in Australia that would make it easy for us to move there. Nobody would know us. We can get out of all of this and leave this behind. How does that sound?”

A hint of a smile creeps up on the corner of your face. “It's a good idea, Christopher, but,” you say, staring at a confused police officer standing over Christopher’s car, “you’re about to get a ticket and you might wanna deal with that first.”

“What?” Christopher gasps, pulling away from your embrace as he grabs your wrist and turns to look at the scene unfolding. “Oh, goddammit,” he whines, pulling you along as he walks towards his car. “C’mon, let’s deal with this and go home.”

The encounter with the police officer is uneventful. Christopher uses his charming charisma to talk his way out of it, even name-dropping some high-level official that he knows. Once the two of you are back in the car, he makes his way to an open parking spot and parks, pulling out his phone. He taps the screen a couple of times, and Jisung’s voice comes through the speakers of the car.

“Did you find her?” Jisung panics over the speaker, sounding as if he was nearly crying. “She isn’t answering my calls or my texts and I’m worried and I haven’t seen anything out here and I -“

“Sungie,” Christopher says, calmly, interrupting Jisung’s panicked word-vomiting, “I’ve got her, it’s okay.”

“I’m so sorry, Sungie,” you say, not really sure if he can even hear you.

“Oh my god, bunny,” he exhales, “are you okay?”

You open your mouth to say something, but Christopher interjects. “She’ll be alright. Go back home, and we can talk about it when we get back. We’ve got some things we all need to discuss.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jisung says with a deep sigh. “I love you, both of you.”

“We love you too,” Christopher smiles as he says it. He presses a button on the steering wheel, hanging up the call, then turns to you. He embraces your hand with one hand and grabs your chin with the other. “Do I need to take you back to the hospital?”

You shake your head.

“Okay, but if that changes,” he pulls you closer to him, and he rests his forehead against yours, “I need you to tell me. I can’t lose you, too. Promise me that you’ll tell me.”

“I promise,” you speak with feigned confidence. Liar.

“Good,” he tilts your head up with his hand, then gently kisses you on the lips. A repetitive chime comes from the centre console of the car, startling both of you, and Christopher rolls his eyes, letting go of your jaw and reaching out to press another button on his steering wheel. “Jisung, I swear, we’re -“

“Hyung,” Felix’s voice comes through the car’s speakers, cutting Christopher off. “Minho-hyung knows where we are. I don’t know if he’s coming here, but he knows where we are and I know he’s found out about Hyunjin and he is beyond furious.”

“Shit.” Christopher’s expression instantaneously sours and his brows furrow. “Did you call the hyung-nim?”

“Yes, hyung. He’s the one that told me. Can’t spare any extra bodies to protect us, though.”

“Alright,” Christopher tightly grabs his face and runs his thumb against his jawline. “You’ve got enough gear there? I’ll pick up Jisung and bring Seungmin and Jeongin with. We’ll be there in a little over three hours.” He lets go of your hand to grasp the gear shift, shifting out of park and into drive, merging his way into traffic.

“I do.”

“Understood. Call me if he shows up before we get there. I know there’s another group connected to the family that’s somewhere in Daegu that can probably help you out, but it’ll be the nuclear option and I don’t want to do it unless we absolutely have to.” Christopher deeply sighs, looking into the rear view mirror for a moment before focusing back on the road. “Hyung-nim’s already mad enough at us as is, but I’m not losing another brother today.”

“Will do,” Felix says with confidence, then cuts the line.

Christopher has a serious look on his face as he focuses on the traffic. He pushes yet another button on the steering wheel and tells the AI of his car to call Jisung. The trilling of the connecting line fills the car and everything feels tense.

“Hey, baby, what’s up?” Jisung’s voice comes through the speakers.

“We’ve got a problem with Felix and Hyunjin,” Christopher says calmly, but clearly concerned. “Minho knows they’re in Daegu and I’m assuming he’s on the way there.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah,” Christopher grits his teeth and exhales with force. “I’m on the way to pick you up. Call Seungmin or Jeongin. Have them both meet us at the apartment, alright?”

“You got it.”

“I don’t want her to come with, but,” you hear Jisung whispering to Christopher in the studio as Jeongin and Seungmin grab a few things from the studio and bring them out to the kitchen counter.

“She ran off, Jisung,” Christopher quietly bites back, “I can’t spare any of us to stay out of this just to watch her. You know that Minho is -“

Jeongin interrupts your eavesdropping as he sits down next to you on the couch. “It’s a nice view, isn’t it?” Part of you is upset that you’re socially obligated to socialize now instead of eavesdropping, but at the same time, you didn’t want to know how much you were inconveniencing Jisung and Christopher.

“Yeah,” you honestly agree, turning your head to look out the window. “I’m not sure how Christopher managed to get a property out here, but it’s impressive.”

“It’s been a while since we’ve chatted with each other.” Jeongin turns to look at you, a slight frown tugging at his lips. “Hyung had mentioned you were having a hard time coming to terms with everything. I know we don’t really know each other well, but you can always reach out to either me or Seungmin if you need to talk to someone different for once.”

“It’s true,” Seungmin perks up from the kitchen, walking into the living room and popping a couple of grapes into his mouth before he sits on the chair opposite from you. “We’re more fun than them, anyways.”

You smile at their words, continuing to stare out at the skyline. How was it that they had gone through all of this and came out seemingly alright? Why was it just you that had difficulties coping with everything? Why did you have problems with every little thing lately, but everyone else was doing so much better than you?

Christopher and Jisung come out of the studio, both of them visibly frustrated, but Jisung at least tried to hide it as he walked into the living room. Christopher grumbles something under his breath, darting off through the kitchen and into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

“Hey,” Jisung awkwardly says as the door slams, closing his eyes tightly and sighing. “Are you all ready to go? We’re running a bit behind, so Chan-hyung is a little frustrated.” You knew that was a lie, that Jisung was just trying to keep the peace.

Seungmin lifts his eyebrows and cocks his head towards Jisung. He smirks, almost like he wants to make some sort of comment, but he shakes his head. “Yeah, I think we’re fine.” He turns to look at both you and Jeongin, then looks back to Jisung. “Hyung gonna be alright, or…?”

Jisung rolls his eyes, waving his hand dismissively in the air. “Yeah, you know how he gets. He’s just,” his eyes subconsciously dart to you, then to the floor as he stumbles over his words, “he’s got a lot to deal with right now. You know?”

Jeongin turns to look at you, gently placing his hand on your knee. “Are you ready?” You take a second to catch your breath, then timidly nod your head and he stands up. “Alright. I think we can get out of here.”

A loud clattering comes from Christopher’s room. The four of you exchange panicked glances with each other, and Jisung takes a step toward the bedroom, stopping as the door flies open. Christopher steps out of the room, now wearing a button up shirt and a thin tie, both in black. You notice he has black gloves on as he adjusts his necktie. There’s also an unlit cigarette in between his teeth, which you knew was a bad sign. He doesn’t bother looking at anyone before he grabs his car keys off of the island in the kitchen and making his way to the front door, slipping on a pair of black loafers. “Grab the shit and let’s go.”

Christopher chain-smokes for nearly the entire way to Daegu. He specifically asked you to sit in the passenger seat next to him, and you believe it’s so he could anxiously hold your hand. For the first forty or so minutes, until you get past Icheon-si, the air is so tense, nobody says anything. The bright LED of the dashboard reflects on Christopher’s face, illuminating the panic he’s trying to suppress as he takes another drag off of his third cigarette.

152km/h. That’s what you see when you turn to look at the big, bold digital letters reflected on the console. It felt much faster than you anticipated, and now you knew why, since the speed limit was 100. “You’re speeding,” you quietly say without thinking.

“Felix needs us,” Christopher says, his voice terse. “I don’t give a fuck about the speed limit. Nobody’s on the road right now.”

“Chan-hyung,” Jisung perks up from the back seat, pulling himself up with your seat to be in between you and Christopher, “you should probably slow down a little, at least. 150 is really fast.”

“Not happening.”

“Hyung,” Seungmin chimes in, “I don’t mean to overstep, but Jisung is right. We’re going to be no help if we -“

“Would all of you shut up?” Christopher shouts, letting go of your hand, flicking the end of his cigarette out of his window as he grabs another one from the open pack and the lighter in the cupholder. The speedometer slowly ticks up to 160 km/h, and the numbers change from blueish-white to yellow. “Nobody else is dying today, not if I can help it. We’ve lost too many people already. One person was enough. Changbin was enough.”

He lifts the cigarette to his mouth and his hands tremble as he flicks the black lighter a couple of times before the flame comes to life. The cigarette smoke always smelled terrible at first, until you got used to it about a minute in, but it wasn’t something you were overly fond of. Maybe once all of this was over, you could convince Christopher to stop smoking for good.

His left hand takes the cigarette from his mouth and he leans his elbow against the door, nervously rubbing his fingertips against his forehead. “Fuck,” he whispers under his breath. There’s another awkward silence as you feel Jisung let go of your seat, relaxing back into his spot. Jeongin whispers something that you can’t quite make out, and Christopher holds down a button on his steering wheel. “Call Lee Felix,” he says as the AI chirps at him.

“Calling, please wait.” the AI responds.

175 km/h. The numbers are now orange.

Christopher grips the steering wheel harder and harder the longer it takes for the call to go through. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he grumbles under his breath, eyes nervously darting between the centre console display and the road. “Fucking pick up, Felix.”

180 km/h.

“Yes, hyung?” Felix’s voice fills the car and you breathe a sigh of relief.

“Thank god, you picked up,” Christopher loosens his grip on the steering wheel just a bit, bringing the cigarette to his mouth and taking a drag from it. “Any word yet?”

“Not yet, hyung.”

“Good,” he exhales, and a cloud of smoke leaves his lips and is violently pulled out of the car through the window. “We’re on the way there, just drove past Icheon-si.”

“Icheon-si? Hyung, that’s…” Felix starts to say with a hint of concern in his voice.

“Don’t worry, I’ve been going a bit over the speed limit,” Christopher scoffs, “as it was kindly brought to my attention. Should be in Daegu in about two hours at this pace. Call me immediately if anything changes, understood?”

“Yes, hyung, but -“

“If you’re about to scold me, I highly advise against it.”

190 km/h.

There’s a momentary pause over the line. “Understood, hyung. My apologies for stepping out of line.” Felix’s voice sounds slightly dejected, but it’s barely noticeable.

“See you soon.” Christopher curtly ends the phone call by pressing the button on the steering wheel again.

200 km/h.

The display is bright red and there is a soft ding that brings Christopher’s attention to the dashboard. “Fucking shit,” he says, and the car slows back down as he moves his foot off the gas pedal. “I’ve never gone that fast before. Holy shit.”

You look at him, reaching a hand over to his hair, brushing it back behind his ear. It had gotten shaggier and curlier over the past few months, his dark roots starting to show more and more obviously as time went on, but it didn’t bother you. In fact, part of you was curious to see what his natural hair colour looked like.

“It’s going to be alright,” you softly whisper, rubbing your thumb against Christopher’s temple. He grabs your hand with his right hand and smiles.

“Thanks, baby,” he doesn’t look at you, but you know he genuinely appreciates the little ways you remind him that you care. He pulls your hand down from his face and gives it a quick kiss before he returns it to your lap, only letting go so he can hold the steering wheel when he ashes his cigarette.

145 km/h. That was tolerable.

It takes maybe an hour and a half to reach the safehouse in Daegu. The building is old, like it had been abandoned a while ago. Siding had started to peel off of the side of the building, making it look dilapidated.

“I recognize that vehicle,” Seungmin says with concern as Christopher parks the car.

“I do, too,” Jisung chimes in, and reaches for his phone. “Nothing. Have you heard from Felix?”

Christopher pulls out his phone, glancing at the screen as he turns the car off. “Shit,” he says, unbuckling his seatbelt and opening his door. “Minho just got here. Let’s go.” The five of you get out of the car, Christopher and Jisung out in front of you, hands on their pistols as Seungmin and Jeongin are on either side of you.

“Stay behind us,” Jeongin whispers as you go up the stairs of the building. “I don’t know if anyone’s told you, but Minho gets violent very quickly. He’s unpredictable; not to mention, he’s got to be exceptionally angry, given the severity of the situation. Both he and Hyunjin are good shots, so try to stay out of the way.”

You approach the top of the stairs, the sounds of shouting coming through the slightly ajar front door. Christopher throws his hand behind him, and everyone stops moving. He cranes his head around the doorframe, then walks in.

“Minho,” he says, as Jisung follows him inside. “You need to step back.” Seungmin and Jeongin follow their superiors inside, and you can’t help but poke your head into the doorway.

“Oh, of course,” Minho turns around at the sound of Christopher’s voice, laughing sarcastically. “Channie has to show up and save the day. What a hero, right? Or is it that maybe you wanted to have a little revenge on Hyunjin for taking away our Changbin?”

The way that Minho spoke made your stomach turn. Something about it made you feel like you were watching a dark psychological thriller film, like you needed to take a shower.

“We decide together,” Christopher calmly says. “Trust me, I understand how angry you are at him, I really do.” Minho takes a couple of steps towards Christopher and his eyes widen, almost like he’s ready to throw a punch at his superior. The three men around Christopher take their pistols and aim them directly at Minho as Christopher tucks his pistol back into its holster and lifts his hands up. “Changbin was my best friend. I’ve known him for almost half my life at this point. Trust me, I get it.”

Christopher turns his head, looking at Hyunjin, who wavers a bit where he stands. “I’d want to make him suffer, too,” he turns back to Minho, “but you know that Changbin wouldn’t want that.”

Minho scoffs, closing his eyes and shaking his head, tilting it down. “Yeah, I know. Changbin was always the level-headed one out of all of us when it came to the family.” He lifts his head back up and a dark expression covers his face. “Changbin isn’t here anymore, though. So, if you and the boys don’t mind,” he turns his head back towards Hyunjin, “I’m gonna get revenge with my fists.” He lifts one of his hands in the air, “Don’t shoot me, though, I’m just gonna beat some sense into him, mano a mano.”

Christopher sighs, turning his head a bit back towards the men behind him, waving his hand dismissively to indicate that the guys should holster their pistols. “Let him,” he simply says, then moves to adjust his necktie. “If it gets bad, we’ll step in.” A part of you didn’t believe that Christopher was being sincere. With how much he cared about Changbin, it was likely he wanted to see Hyunjin suffer, but didn’t want to be the one to deal with it.

“No the fuck you won’t,” Minho snaps as he walks towards Hyunjin. “Pretty boy is mine to deal with.” He grabs the collar of the younger man and shoves him up against the wall. Felix takes a couple of steps around the men, walking over to Christopher and whispering something unintelligible from this far away.

“You know this is your fault,” Hyunjin says with a cocky look on his face. “If you never fell for Changbin after Shanghai, you know we’d be at the top now.”

Minho takes one of his fists and brings it to Hyunjin’s cheek, it slamming against his cheekbone with a thump. “If you hadn’t gotten so goddamn cocky,” he grips the collar of Hyunjin’s shirt again, shoving him into the wall a little firmer, “we wouldn’t have fucked up that deal. The Triads were fucking pissed at you and that’s on you. I wouldn’t have gotten shot if it wasn’t for your shitty fucking bravado.”

Hyunjin scoffs, drawing his head back a bit and colliding it with Minho’s with a heavy thud. Minho lets go of Hyunjin’s collar and grabs his head, moaning out in pain. “Fucking hell,” he grumbles with a slight slur.

“You were such a coward. Still are,” Hyunjin says, grabbing his forehead as he knees Minho in the stomach. “Temporarily left the fucking family because your precious Binnie was so worried about you. You really thought you were just gonna leave, go somewhere and start a happy family?” He scoffs and rolls his eyes. “As if. No one makes it out of here sane or alive.”

Minho growls as he reorients himself upright. He draws his arm back and literally leaps at Hyunjin, his fist colliding against his face again. This time, however, they land on the floor and throw fists back and forth until their faces and knuckles are bloodied. “If you never got involved with that fucking Triad girl,” Minho spits blood down onto Hyunjin’s face in anger, “we would never be here. Changbin would still be alive, the two of us would be out, then you could have had it all. But you went and flew too close to the goddamn sun, you fucking traitor.” Minho pushes himself to his feet and reaches for his pistol.

A chill runs through the air as Hyunjin calmly stands up, drawing his pistol in response. “It’s not my fault,” he says coolly, then turns to glare at you. “If it wasn’t for her,” he nods in your direction, then turns back to Minho, “Changbin wouldn’t have died. All I wanted to do was to give him a little warning shot so Minji and I could get out of there. But, you know your precious Changbin. Always had to be the brave, strong hero.” He squints his eyes and cockily smirks. “You loved that about him and you know that.”

Christopher tenses, sensing the shift in tone, and he grabs his pistol, motioning for you to get back, but it’s clearly too late to intervene.

It happens in an instant, time slowing down like the time that Christopher got shot in front of you. You see Minho’s arms raise up, aiming his pistol at Hyunjin, who responds in kind by aiming his pistol at Minho. However, he’s a bit too slow.

Minho fires his gun once, square into Hyunjin’s shoulder. The younger man shrieks and recoils, but manages to fire a shot into Minho’s stomach before he collides into the ground. The older man falls forward, crashing into the floor like a rag doll. Blood flies everywhere, painting the room and the men in splatters of deep crimson.

Hyunjin weakly coughs a couple of times. “Idiot,” he groggily whispers before his head rolls away from you.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Minho coughs out, thick blood coming up from his throat. Felix immediately moves towards Minho, but the older man shakes his head once. “Let me fucking die.” The younger man stops in his tracks, nods, then moves to Hyunjin. He pores over the long-haired man, reaching up to his throat, letting out a deep sigh, shaking his head.

Minho lazily rolls onto his back, staring up to the ceiling. “I know you never would have wanted me to get revenge,” he scoffs, more blood coming up and spilling down his cheek, “but you knew me better than that. You were always the, ah,” he coughs a couple of times, “always the wiser one out of the two of us. I might have been older, but you were smarter.” He closes his eyes and lets out a shaky sigh. “I love you so much. You made me so much better. Sorry, baby. Hope you’re there on the other side. Heh. Hope there’s an other…”

A creaky groan comes from Minho, and that’s the last noise he makes. The room falls silent and nobody moves for a while. A few tears fall down your face. Minho may have been flighty and impossible to understand sometimes, but he showed you nothing but compassion and kindness when he first met you.

“Hi, I’m Lee Minho,” the memory of his introduction replays in your head. “Changbin’s probably talked about me by now.” You remember the way he softly smiled as he offered a slight bow to you. The way he looked at Changbin while he was half-drunk and high off of ecstasy, the way he whined at Changbin and pulled him into an embrace when he was half-asleep the next day. “Cuddle me and make it better.” There was no way he was truly a bad person, not by all of his interactions with you. He just loved Changbin and didn’t know how to appropriately act about it at times.

Your knees painfully collided into the ground and you just started sobbing. Sure, Minho had moments where he was absolutely insane, but the memories you had with him physically hurt as they passed through your head.

Daegu. You were in Daegu. You probably weren’t far away from where he and Changbin were for the Colourful Daegu Festival a long time ago. How happy they must have been when they were tripping on acid and listening to music. God, how much they must have loved each other. All of the happy memories they had, only to end in pain and misery and literal fucking death.

“Don’t let Channie intimidate you,” you remember him telling you the day that Christopher came home from the hospital, not long before Changbin brought him home. You were both on the couch, aimlessly talking about life as Jisung took a nap in the bedroom.

“What do you mean?” You had asked, turning to look at Minho.

“He’s a little intense sometimes,” he continued, folding his hands together and bringing them to the back of his head. “but he cares. Once he gets close to someone, he gets protective and it’s endearing. It’s usually just a bit intense at the beginning. I mean, you saw how he got when he found out you and Sungie had been together, but he cares. and just doesn’t know how to show it sometimes.”

You cocked your head to the side and mumbled in agreement.

“I remember when he found out that Changbin and I were dating. Wow,” Minho sighed as he rolled his head up to look at the ceiling. “Man, was he pissed. He yelled and yelled and totally reamed me. ‘First, you get shot for him,’ he said to me, ‘now you’re in love with him? With my best friend?’” Minho smiled at the memory. “That’s how I knew he really cared about Binnie. He wasn’t mad at me, he was just protective of his best friend.”

“Huh,” you mumbled out, then leaned back up against the couch, staring up at the ceiling with Minho.

“He gave me his blessing eventually,” Minho continued, “but he told me that if I ever broke Binnie’s heart, he’d break my kneecaps in two and make sure nobody found me at the bottom of the ocean.”

Your eyes widened and you turned to look at Minho in terror.

Minho tilted his head towards you and smiled. “Real charmer, ain’t he? Very endearing type. He falls fast. Probably loves you already, just doesn’t know how to say it. Be ready for it to come completely out of the blue.”

You run your hands through your hair, rocking back and forth as you sob so hard that your throat started to ache. Someone takes a few steps towards you, then bends down, pulling you into their arms. “It’s okay,” Jisung’s voice whispers in your ear, “it’s gonna be okay, bunny, I promise.”

Liar. Everyone was a fucking liar.

“I’ll take care of this,” Felix quietly says to Christopher as you and Jisung sit on the middle of the staircase. “Don’t worry about it, hyung.”

“You sure?” Christopher flatly questions, his voice devoid of emotion. “I can call the hyung-nim and -“

“Hyung,” Felix presses. “Do you know how many bodies I’ve dealt with over the years? All the time in nursing school? It’s fine. It’s just another part of the job. Besides, the hyung-nim is still pretty miffed at us. Can’t imagine how happy he’s gonna be to hear that two more of us are gone.”

Christopher sighs, and you hear them slap each other on the back. “Thanks, Felix.”

“Not by blood,” Felix starts.

“By the code.” Christopher finishes their pact with a deep sigh. “I want you to come back up to Seoul when you’re, ah,” his breath hitches as he speaks, “when you’re done. Alright?”

“Understood, hyung.” Felix says. “You’re buying the drinks, though.”

Christopher lets out a strained chuckle as he comes down the stairs. “Yeah, yeah.” He slowly approaches you, sitting down on the stairs behind you and Jisung. “I’m sorry you both had to see this. I’m sorry this went so badly so fast.”

“Chan,” Jisung turns his head over his shoulder, looking up to Christopher. “Are you going to be alright driving back to Seoul tonight? There’s the other safehouse, or I can drive down to Busan; it’s only an hour or so from here.”

“No,” Christopher says, probably shaking his head like he did when he pretended he wasn’t bothered by something. “I don’t mind. Just gotta stop somewhere, get an energy drink and another pack of cigarettes and we’ll be fine.”

You lift your head up from your hands, staring off into the horizon as the sun starts to come up. It felt like you had been here for an eternity. A burning, gnawing sensation burned in your stomach as you mentally pictured Minho laying on the floor, blood spilling down his face. A cold sweat broke out over your skin and your body started to tingle everywhere.

Oh, shit.

You were going to be sick. You bolt up to your feet, running down the last couple stairs and prop yourself up against the railing as you spill the contents of your stomach on the pavement, painting the ground in a disgusting shade of green.

“Ah, baby,” Christopher whines, coming up behind you as he rubs his hand on your back, pulling your hair back in a loose fist with his other hand. “It’s gonna be okay, I promise.”

Liar. Everyone was fucking lying again.

Footsteps trail up the staircase, disappearing into the building as you hear Jisung say something to Felix. Your stomach retches again and searing acid comes up and splatters onto the ground, causing you to cough in a panic as it felt like your throat was closing. The cycle repeats itself a couple of times, and by the time you’re almost sure you’re done being sick, Jisung is on the other side of you, rubbing your lower back and handing you a cold bottle of water.

“It’s okay,” he lies, because everyone’s lying. Nothing was going to be fine. Nothing would ever be fine ever again. “When you can, take a drink of this. We can take as much time as you need.”

You snatch the bottle out of his hand with disgust, standing upright and breaking the seal of the bottle, taking a swig of its contents. The pH of stomach acid fluctuated between 1.5 and 3.5, you randomly remember from your university days. Water was neutral at 7. The way the water burned going down your throat made it feel like it was at a pH of 1.

Everything felt like battery acid. The way the stomach acid burned as it came up, the way the water felt as it went down, the way that everyone was lying to you, the way that life seemed to absolutely abhor your guts - literally and metaphorically. Even though you knew that Christopher and Jisung were doing their best at just trying to console you, their hands felt like battery acid burning into your back.

You sighed as you tilted your head up to look at the sky. The sun was coming up, but there was still a deep shade of violet far off in the distance, white spots spattered against the technicolour backdrop. A single red spot in the distance caught your eye. Huh. Wasn’t that supposed to be Mars if you saw a red star?

A red star. A red spot.

Wait a second.

Oh shit.

“Don’t we need to go to a convenience store?” You say, turning to Christopher, trying to sound as calm as possible as you do some mental calculations.

“Yeah, how come?” He responds, tilting his head in confusion.

“I’ll grab the stuff for you. I wanna grab a snack and some things to drink for the ride home.” You lie, a fake smile plastered on your face. “It’ll let you and the guys talk about family stuff for a minute without me, you know? Not like I can run away if you’re right in front of the store, right?”

Christopher’s face falls into a frown and he shakes his head. “I guess that’s fine. Jisung’s going with you, though.”

Shit.

“Chan,” Jisung says with a scoff, “I’ll just wait outside. She’ll be fine.”

Christopher glares at Jisung, then turns away, rolling his hands in the air. “Fine, fine,” he sighs, walking towards the car, “if she runs, you’re going after her.”

Jeongin gets off from the trunk of the car, shoving Seungmin’s shoulder and startling the poor man. Must’ve been nodding off. “C’mon, Seungmin,” he quietly says, “looks like we’re getting ready to go.”

“Is something wrong?” Jisung says as he steps in front of you, calculatedly avoiding your artistic addiction to the pavement. “Something doesn’t seem right.”

“It’s just a lot to process,” it’s a half-truth, really, “figured you guys could use a minute to yourselves and I could use a minute to myself.

“You’re not gonna run, are you?” Jisung sounds concerned as he tilts your chin up to look you in the eyes.

“I’m not, I promise.” For once today, you were telling the entire truth.

Jisung doesn’t really pay attention to you as you wander around inside the convenience store. You grab a couple of snack foods off the shelf, not really thinking or caring about what you grabbed, too busy focusing on the real reason you were there. You walk around the store until you reach the more household-like items. Nervously, you roll your eyes up, checking to see if Jisung was still staring off into space.

Luckily, he still wasn’t paying attention. You eye a box, snatching it off of the shelf, then spin on your heel and grab a few drinks from the cooler behind you. As you walk up to the counter, you ask the clerk for whatever stupid brand of cigarettes that Christopher smoked, trying to hide the box from Jisung’s line of vision.

The clerk eyes you with judgement and shakes her head. She rings up all of the items, saving the box for last, but you grab it from her before she can place it in the bag and you shove it in the pocket of your hoodie. She cocks her head in confusion, then decides it must be too early to really question anything. “₩21,050.” You pull out a few bills from your pocket and slip them to her. She hands you some change then asks, “need the washroom?”

You turn to look at Jisung, who’s staring at you now. “Y-yeah,” you stutter out, “lemme just give this stuff to my boyfriend real quick.”

“First door in the back, to your left. Good luck.” The clerk scoffs, then goes back to her coffee.

You take a couple steps to the door, opening it and passing the bag off to Jisung. “Gonna use the washroom, be back in a second.” He opens his mouth to say something, but follows you into the store.

“I trust you,” he lies, otherwise he wouldn’t be following you, “but you know that Chan would kill me if I didn’t follow you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you tuck one of your hands into your front pocket and open the door. “I get it, just give me a minute.” You slip through the door as Jisung stares at you in confusion.

06:32. You make a mental note of the digital display as you get back into the car and slide your seatbelt on.

“You look a little pale, baby,” Christopher says as he rubs his finger on your face. “I know today has been a lot, but are you alright? You sure you wanna go back to Seoul today?”

“I’m fine,” you lie, swallowing down some of your panic. Subconsciously, your eyes dart to the clock again. “I’m just tired. It’s been a long day. Long month. Long year.”

Jisung sighs from the back seat. “You can say that again.”

Christopher leans in to kiss your cheek, then unwraps the plastic from the pack of cigarettes in his hand. He pulls one out of the package, lifting it to his lips as he rolls down the window. “Everyone ready?”

Nobody really says anything, so Christopher shrugs his shoulders, lighting his cigarette before shifting the car into drive and making his way through the streets of Daegu. He takes in a long drag from his cigarette and lets out a sigh.

06:34.

“What a fucking year,” he says, not really expecting anyone to respond. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do if something else happens to us. I just wanna get out of the family, you know?”

Jeongin chimes in, “Yeah, I think I’m about ready to call it quits, too. Maybe go back to school and get a degree in something. Be a productive member of society instead of whatever this is.”

Seungmin laughs. “I feel you on that. Kkangpae isn’t really a marketable skill on a resume, is it? Imagine how that interview would go. Yeah, I have some good business skills, sir, but you don’t wanna know how I learned them. I can tell you how much a single dose of molly will go for on the street, though. Did I get the job? When do I start?”

The guys laugh, but you offer a polite smirk as your keep your eyes trained on the clock. 06:36. Why was it that when you wanted time to pass faster, it always seemed to go slower? Why was life so paradoxically cruel sometimes?

“Chan-hyung and I are pretty good at music,” Jisung perks up, “maybe we could become some idols or something? I’ve got the face for it.”

Christopher snorts and rolls his eyes. “Yeah, like that would ever happen. I don’t want that kind of life, sounds too busy. Besides,” he looks over at you, then back to the road, “I don’t think they’d take too kindly to the fact that I’m already dating not only one, but two, people. Really wouldn’t like the fact that one of them is another dude.”

06:38.

“Good point,” Jisung says, probably rolling his eyes. “Life is a cruel mistress, isn’t it?”

“I just don’t get it,” Seungmin says, “like, why is it anyone else’s business what people do in the space of their own homes? If it doesn’t hurt anyone, who cares?”

Jeongin scoffs. “You’re just saying that because you don’t want people to find out about your collection of -“

“Shut up!” Seungmin pleads with a whine, cutting off the younger man. “Why the hell do we live with each other again?”

06:40. Good enough.

You tilt your head to the side, pulling out the piece of plastic, pretending you’re looking at a piece of string. Your face falls when you eyes see a bright pink cross staring back at you, as if it were another way for life to slap you in the face.

“You alright?” Jisung’s voice startles you as you jam your hand back into your pocket.

“Y-yeah,” you sputter, “just thinking about how life really is cruel sometimes, you know?”

You were pregnant and you were definitely not okay with the idea of that.

“It’ll be okay, though,” you say as you stare out the window.

Everyone’s fucking lying.

a/n: surprise! i literally cried writing this chapter too. chapter eleven is probably about halfway done as i post this, so hopefully you won’t need to wait too long for it. just a heads up, there will be triggering content in the last chapter, and it will be clearly labelled. the epilogue, step out! see you in the next life will briefly cover part of the ending of chapter eleven if you’re curious but don’t want to read it. thanks for sticking around for this wild ride. can’t wait to see you next chapter.

edit: mano a mano means hand to hand, not man to man btw. just found that out lol.

#tw: suicidal ideation #tw: death #tw: mental instability #tw: mental health #tw: ptsd #tw: firearms #tw: violence #tw: blood #step out do what you want

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pudgecuddles · 4 years ago

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Fic Recs!

Sorry this took a while to compile, but here you go, just in time for your birthday @chocochub!

I went ahead and tried to describe any triggers or reasons for the rating (sex vs. violence). I’m sorry if I missed anything that makes you uncomfy that‘s the last thing I want!

Also I got really sleepy around the time I was formatting this so sorry if there’s any errors with links, grammar, or trigger warnings. I’ve tried to be as thorough as I can, but many of these I’ve finished over a year ago and can’t recall every theme or possibly upsetting event :(

•

Red Sky in Morning by GinForInk

Rating: E for Sex, Violence and Loss of Limb

Relationships: TaeJoon, YoonKook

Themes: Pirate AU, Curse AU, Adventure, Supernatural, Mystery, Horror

Summary: Captain Namjoon's cursed crew searches the Caribbean for a ship that can save them, and Namjoon's own men have more magic than they let on.

My notes: Even though there’s sex, it’s less smut and more romantic/stress relief than purposefully pornographic. Very heavy on Supernatural and Adventure. Characters are written very well! Definitely a favorite of mine.

•

Hijacker’s Island by Gobi17

Rating: T for semi-graphic violence and attempted sexual assault from a villain.

Relationships: None

Themes: Hijack Gone Wrong, Plane Crash, Island Survival, Befriending the Baddies, Psychological Thriller, Mystery, Action

Summary: Jungkook's flight home ends in disaster as a group of hijackers take over the plane, and events quickly spiral out of control.

My Notes: I really loved this one. It was an interactive story where the audience was able to choose what choices Jungkook (the main character) would make. His survival depended on the answers, and I was on the edge of my seat the entire time. There is a lot of platonic character bonding, so no sex, however there is a bad guy that fixates on Kookie that later attempts to sexually assault him. If this is triggering to you please do not read.

•

Butterfingers by jincherie

Rating: G

Relationships: RM/Reader

Themes: Co-workers, Teachers, Hybrids, Penguin-Hybrid Joon, Heavy Fluff, Penguin Courting uwu

Summary: He had you at the very first pebble he gave you.

My notes: Extremely cute. I’m not usually on for Reader fics as they’re usually rife with unneeded smut and OOC-ness, but I love Namjoon being an awkward, unusual Hybrid and I LOVE cute, animalistic behavior.

•

Do Not Meddle In The Affairs Of Dragons, For You Are Crunchy And Taste Good With Ketchup by Runchrandom

Rating: T

Relationships: OT7, but Namjoon-centric

Themes: Supernatural, Humor, Crack treated seriously, part of a series, Dragon-Joon

Summary: In which Namjoon is a man who doesn't know what he wants, then accidentally figures it out while turning into a very large lizard.

My notes: Part of a very cute and funny series of Supernatural boyband BTS, navigating their inherent differences and similarities. Also lots of protective Dragon Namjoon taking good care of his Treasures UwU

•

you have 1 new message by bazooka

Rating: T

Relationship: NamJin (my OTP)

Themes: Humor, Text Fic, Imbedded Pictures, Suspense/Mystery

Summary:

r u n c h r a n d a.

fuck

this is going to sound like the weirdest shit

okay look i used ur selcas to catfish and this older dude is gonna buy me stuff but i have to send him a selca with a peace sign

~ * ~ pingkeu jin ~ * ~

hahahahahahaha wtf

My notes: As someone who steers clear of text fics, this one I actually loved! Very funny and clever, the developing relationship between NamJin is hilarious. It also turns into a mystery/thriller???

(You can only read it if you have an Ao3 account as it’s locked to users only)

•

Vending Machines and Bad Ideas by smiles

Rating: G

Themes: Blind Dates, Meet Cute, Humor, Rom-Com

Relationships: 2Seok

Summary: Hoseok needed to focus, regroup. He needed to evaluate the situation, weigh his options, and find a solution. He needed to work through this like the capable adult he was. He needed to get his hand out of this stupid vending machine.

My notes: 2Seok is a guilty pleasure of mine lol. This was cute, funny and sweet.

•

Human by SunShineSwag

Rating: E for Graphic Violence, Many Murders, Sex, Mentions of Past Abuse and Temporary Character Death

Themes: Serial Killer/Dexter AU, Suspense/Mystery, Romance, Crime, Fluff, Hobi Teaches Yoongi How To Emotion™

Relationships: SOPE, NamJin, side VMinKook

Summary: During the day, Yoongi works for the police as a forensic expert.

But when night falls, he becomes a nightmare.

A serial killer.

My notes: Just finished this one and wow I’m so in love! It seems really intimidating from the tags and summary, but I swear it is also super ooey gooey soft and mushy. There is lots of angst, suspense and hurt/comfort, but with a very happy ending! I actually avoided this fic for a few months cause I didn’t think I was in the right headspace for something super dark, but it was actually quite fluffy.

•

Jungkook’s House for the Wayward Werewolf by Rivertoforever

Rating: T for Non-Sexual Intimacy

Themes: Supernatural, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, slight Dom/sub dynamics, Werewolfs, Very Non-Traditional ABO, Asexual/Poly Relationship, Roomate AUish

Relationships: OT7 but very Jungkook-centric

Summary: Being the only human in a household of werewolves can lead to strange experiences, mixed signals, weird behaviour and a lap full of fur.

My notes: This is one of my favorite stories of all time! It’s unfortunately unfinished and has been for a while, so if you’re not a fan of WIPs this won’t be for you :( Otherwise, I reread it all the time! I remember loving the relationship and dynamic between the characters and how they were all very respectful of JK not wanting to be physical with them. A year later I discover I’m Ace! Haha! I consider this fic one of the many things that pushed me in the right direction. It’s very cute, fluffy and soft!

•

[And uh... I considered putting this on the list before but thought it was a little too heavy on sex/smut so I took it off, but I’ll leave it here for you to decide. I think that the smut scenes in this fic aren’t necessarily there for “smexy cock fun times” and are more outright statements on gender equality, sociology, informed consent and healthy relationships. Hence why I’ve left it in!]

Mentoring on Marsa by FlyYouFools1

Rating: E for Sex, Firm Dub-Con, Discussion of Non-Con, Violence, Unhealthy Relationships

Themes: ABO, Technically Aliens?, Societal Differences, Culture Shock, Kind of Sugar Baby AU, Viva La Omegan Revolution, Teaching Alphas to Not Be Dicks™, One Big Fat Metaphor for Real Life Gender Discrimination and Systematic Abuse

Relationships: VMinKook, YoonJinNamSeok

Summary: Jungkook comes to the planet Marsa after being promised a full scholarship to Marsa National University. When the scholarship falls through, his academic advisor gives him the number for a mentoring service for newly stranded omegas on Marsa. With rent due, no way home, and no success in finding a job, Jungkook calls the number. The organization sends him Min Yoongi, a fellow omega who's been living on Marsa for 8 years. Yoongi teaches him how to survive. Jungkook's first attempt at survival is alpha couple Jimin and Taehyung.

My notes: This is the really long part one that just finished. It’s 50 chapters of emotional healing, statements on consent, character growth and sneaky omegas. I’m a huge fan of non-traditional ABO fics, and I love when sex is treated not as a “just cause I can”, but as an actual example of gender politics and relationship growth. If anyone is aspec, this might not be the story for you! But if you can mentally push past the idea of sex, I assure you it’s not “porn for the sake of porn”.

#phew #its finally done #sorry this took so long!#I was going through all of my bookmark folders for fics that matched what you said you liked #I specifically left out the ones with smut death or extremely dark themes #and I also made sure nearly all of these fics are finished or one shots #happy birthday again!

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kayr0ss · 5 years ago

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Appointments Chapter 5: Headaches and Some Music

[LWA, Diakko, Small Town AU, Fluff and Slow Romance, Pining™ lol]

Chapter 1 & Table of Contents AO3 Link

Diana pursed her lips, locked in a heated stare-down against the newest occupant of her apartment.

“Please behave yourself until I return.”

The cat ‘mew’ed’ in reply as though he understood and resumed licking the back of his paw. All things considered, he seemed to be a surprisingly well-behaved cat. Who looked polite. This small comfort was enough to make up for the ridiculousness of having to talk to a cat, and Diana realized that she had never been more excited to return to her clinic as she was now.

The normalcy of work, she thought to herself, is beginning to feel like a comfort versus the absurdity of my home’s current state of affairs.

She stepped through her doorway into a lovely Blytonbury morning. The habitual glance towards her watch read 09:51, urging her to walk at a quicker pace than usual. She regrettably strode right by Jasminka’s café—there was no time to pass by tea, and she hadn’t woken up early enough to make some for herself that morning.

Of course, because of the cat.

The day prior, she’d had to return home later than usual to fetch her feline tenant the basic supplies: a small can of cat-food, a litterbox, and two bowls for food and milk. The real challenge was in the ‘teaching him not to leave any form of excrement where he shouldn’t.’ Pleasant behavior aside, it seemed Toby was actually quite intelligent—although by the time it was two o’clock in the morning, her NewTube suggestions were a peculiar mix of medical lectures and ‘How to Potty Train Your Cat’ videos.

She made her way through the crosswalk—ensuring that no brunettes were running about—and mentally prepared herself for the day she was about to have. There were no scheduled patients before lunch, giving her enough time to review case files for a busy afternoon.

When she stepped through the glass door to her clinic, Barbara was already lounging behind her desk and flipping—as usual—through a novel.

“Good morning,” she peaked out from behind ‘NightFall 12: The Oblivion of Love’. “You’re on the dot today.”

“I always am,” Diana replied lightly. “Good morning to you as well.”

“You’re always at least fifteen minutes early,” Barbara corrected, smiling kindly. Then the nurse leaned forward, scrutinizing Diana with an observant gaze. “You’re…”

The blonde lifted her eyebrow in silent response.

“Something.” Barbara said slowly, as if trying to figure a puzzle out. She waved a hand to dismiss the thought. “Must have been my imagination, just thought there was something off. Anyway, I’ve laid down the patient files for the afternoon. We’ve got ourselves a slow morning.”

“Thank you,” Diana nodded politely, slipping into her whitecoat and thankful that she didn’t have to explain the kind of morning (and evening) she’d had. She settled into her chair, entertaining the thought of going through the documents Barbara had prepared before deciding she wasn’t in the right headspace for that. A headache. Massing her temples, she ascribed her irritability at a lack of sleep and constant worrying over her furniture’s wellbeing. She inwardly cursed her lack of morning tea—and really hoped her furniture were okay.

Learning back with a sigh, her eyes drifted towards a pamphlet at the edge of her table. It was the St. Beatrix MMC residency brochure on Cardiology. She’d probably read its contents nearly ten times over by now. In truth, the hospital had already reached out to her: she was “everything they were looking for”, or so the chief resident had said—a young doctor with an impeccable educational background. Diana had been truly grateful, but she was committed to taking the time she’d need to be absolutely sure. Which she wasn’t. At least, not yet.

There was a knock on her door, and Barbara was peeking through the doorframe. “Water. And an aspirin. Because for some reason you look—uh.”

“Off?” Diana tilted her head.

“Like shit.” Barbara nodded, and Diana would have had something to say about her choice of language if it weren’t for the fact that she was probably right. “Did anything happen?”

“Just a few issues to iron over at home,” she replied cryptically.

Barbara looked like she wanted to ask more, but decided not to prod. “That won’t do. We’re having lunch over at the Russian lady’s and getting those croissants you love so much, but in the meantime drink that Advil because someone’s gotta look after the doctor looking after everyone else.”

Diana smiled and felt a wave of gratitude pour through her over Barbara’s thoughtfulness.

“Which reminds me,” the other woman set the items down to Diana’s desk, “the cat’s gone.”

The blonde immediately looked down at the suddenly-very-interesting-patient-files. “I—Indeed.”

“You know, I think I’ll actually miss him. He was kind of cute.”

Diana was ready to remind her of the importance of workplace cleanliness when the front bell chimed louder than usual. The glass pane of the door practically swung open with force.

“Heya, doc! And miss nurse!”

Oh.

Barbara was the first to recover. “Where did you fall in this time? Was it a ditch? Or did you fly off your bike again?”

Atsuko Kagari-with-blood-ty—Oh, enough of that! She’s just Akko!—had come barging in with a large paper bag, effectively elevating Diana’s headache through several numbers up the VNRS pain scale.

“I—” Akko shot the nurse a smug look “—have yet to experience an accident this week!”

“That’s a first,” Barbara crossed her arms.

“But I’m here for you!”

Those stunning red eyes locked themselves onto Diana, and suddenly she couldn’t speak. Me? The brunette strode into her office. She dropped the paper bag onto her desk.

“I’m not quite sure I follow. What is this?”

“Child support!”

Diana flinched. Barbara blinked. Akko simply nodded to herself in smug satisfaction.

“For Toby. Since we’re co-parents now.” Akko clarified, looking completely serious. “There’s a bunch of cat food that should last a while, a cute mouse squeaky toy, and animal milk.”

The blonde felt her ears redden at the incredulous look Barbara was giving her, and seriously—was this seriously happening right now? “C—Co-parents?”

“Yes.” Akko nodded with a determined glint in her eyes. “And I’m no deadbeat mom!”

“I—I see.”

“Anyway,” Akko took one of the pens from Diana’s stand without asking (“Don’t do that.”), and leaned over to write on the blank prescription pad on the blonde’s desk. “Here’s my number so you can text me about anything he needs and so we can arrange my visitation rights!”

Visitation rights?

“Oh.” Akko paused, lifting her thumb to her chin. “We probably need to schedule a trip to the vet and get him a collar, too.”

We?

Not knowing what else to say and still completely blindsided by Akko’s—well, everything—Diana simply complied. “I… know a veterinarian. He’s a childhood friend.”

“Perfect!” Akko beamed.

Once again, it was disarming. She really had to stop doing that to Diana.

“I’ve got to study for a test so I gotta bounce but I’m so excited to see him again!” Akko leaned across the table, moving around at a pace faster than Diana’s sleep-deprived-due-to-Toby’s mind could follow. The brunette wrapped her hand around her forearm and gave her another smile. It was warm. “But really—thank you Diana! I’ll see you around!”

She turned on her heel like the bundle of energy she was and bolted right out the door with a wave to Barbara.

Barbara—who looked right about ready to explode into laughter in the wake of Akko’s departure.

“You kept him.”

“Please don’t.” Diana pleaded.

The nurse finally caved, leaning against the doorframe to her office for support while she snickered. “That’s why you look completely out of it! You’ve got to tell me everything.”

But then the thudding sound of footsteps interrupted their conversation yet again and the door swung open. Poor thing. Might need to have its hinges checked at this point.

“I almost forgot!” Akko came bursting into the room like a cannon ball. “I got this on my way here for you!”

She slammed a paper take-out cup from Jasminka’s café onto Diana’s desk.

“I have no idea what it is to be honest.” Akko yelled, already rushing back out in a hurry. “I just asked Jas for a cup of whatever your usual is! Okay-bye-for-real!”

She was gone in a flash. Diana could smell tea.

English Breakfast, prepared exactly the way she liked it. The aroma was enough to chase away the tension along her brow, and when she glanced towards Barbara, who looked just as lost as she felt—

—they shared soft laughter.

The whole thing was absolutely ridiculous. Including the fact that her cup was labeled: ‘Dr. Grumpy >:(’

---

It was 5:30PM and Akko was in despair.

“Chikusho! That was a disaster.” Akko banged her head against the lecture room desk. She was reeling from the mental assault that was ‘Applied Physics Examination 1.’ Judging by the scowl on Sucy’s usually nonchalant face, it hit her pretty hard too. “How’d you do?”

“Tanginang test ‘yan.” She glowered in her native language.

“I’m going to assume that was a string of curse words.”

“For once in your idiot life, you are correct.”

“Mou!” Akko huffed.

“I’m out.” Sucy declared, and likewise, every fiber in Akko’s being wanted to get the hell out of this classroom as soon as possible. The purple-haired girl lazily slung her bag over shoulder and looked down at Akko (who was still very much slumped over the desk) through one eye. “So are you coming or should I leave you behind?”

Akko groaned. And then sighed. And then groaned another time while pointing towards the podium because—“First I have to walk over there and ask if she wants to join the running club.”

“The professor?” Sucy blinked.

“Ya, dude.”

Then Sucy was grinning daggers. “I think I’m gonna stick by and see if she’ll actually murder you this time.”

“Not funny!” Akko pouted while finally standing up and cursing the fact that she can no longer exist as a worry-free blob on a desk.

“It is. A little. Now go.” Sucy prodded on, repeatedly poking at her arm.

“Going, going!”

While the students slowly filed out of the room—in despair, mind you—Akko approached Dr. Meridies with Sucy lingering a safe distance behind her.

The lilac-haired professor looked up from a test sheet she was inspecting, looking, as one would say, way too tired for this shit. “No amount of begging is going to convince me to pass you.”

“I wasn’t going to!” Akko crossed her arms defiantly.

“Then why are we having this conversation?”

Well. There wasn’t any other way for this to go down than directly, so it was best to just blurt it out. “Do you want to join the running club?”

Dr. Meridies reeled, squinting. “The running club?”

“Yes.” Akko nodded. “The running club.”

“So many people are asking me to join this running club that I think I’m gonna start declining just out of spite.”

“Ugh!” Akko groaned. “I tried—can’t force you! Maybe Professor du Nord can, Kami-sama, why did I even both—”

“Wait wait wait—” Dr. Meridies raised a hand to shut Akko while scowling. “du Nord?”

“Yeah,” Akko said looked to the side with slumped shoulders, “the club moderator. And I’m here cause Diana asked so now that I’ve done that I’m just gonna boun—”

Oddly enough, the exasperated professor seemed to have tuned out. “Chariot du Nord, from Humanities?”

“Uh, yeah.” The brunette blinked. “Do you know her?”

“O—Of course.” The older woman began stare so hard at the table she could have burned a hole through. “Faculty and all.”

Akko caught on like a wolf, grinning mischievously. “You know her!”

“Like I said we both teach—”

“You know know her.”

“Out!” Dr. Meridies barked, “of my classroom!”

With a devious glint, which Akko swore she could see in Sucy’s eyes too, she waved in exaggerated politeness and made her way to the door.

“Okay, professor!” Oh, she loved this sort of drama! “Just saying—it’s on Monday evenings!”

“You should have seen her face!” Akko squealed with almost manic glee. “Oh, Lotte you’re gonna love it—I know you’re a sucker for this kind of stuff.”

“But I can’t imagine it! How does Professor du Nord—” Lotte gestured towards her life with both hands for emphasis “—who seems super sweet and kind of introverted but is generally made of sunshine, find herself with a history of romantic involvement with someone like Dr. Meridies—” she made a quick jerking motion towards the right. “Who I haven’t actually seen in person, and if I were to base my judgments off your descriptions she sounds like some mad-scientist antagonist in an anime who’d wear a cape.”

Akko blinked. “That’s a good one.”

Sucy actually nodded.

“It makes no sense!” Lotte shook her head. And then… she swooned. “But love never does, does it?”

“Makes about as much as sense as this idiot getting that doctor to adopt the cat.”

“’The cat’ is named Toby!” Akko chided, “and you’d be hard-pressed to deny him if you’ve seen that cute little face of his.”

The three women were lazing about Lotte and Sucy’s living-and-dining area, with Akko sprawled across the couch that she’d be sleeping on since the pair—or just Lotte—invited her to stay over. There was take-out and beer (which Sucy and Akko had picked up on their way home), and the mini-get-together served two purposes: to recover from that horrid examination, and to keep Akko company because “tomorrow’s my first day of work and I am way too nervous to fall asleep without beer or Lotte nagging me to!”

There was something deeply comfortable about the small apartment. The furnishing didn’t match up and yet every piece felt like they belonged. Pots and pans hung above the stove, used yet well-maintained. They always had an extra set of everything—as though guests were welcome and often come and go. She loved it. And loved how welcome she felt in it. And though she’d never impose unless invited, Akko felt… cozy. Books, and mushrooms, and odd test-tubes, and literary manuscripts and all.

Lotte was in the middle of sharing the gist of her latest writing exercise when Akko felt her phone buzz.

“Hold on,” she excused herself, “I swear if this is a Canvas notification I’m gonna cut a bi—oh!”

“What is it?” Lotte asked.

18:53 Good evening. This Dr. Cavendish’s number – I’ve been able to secure an appointment with Dr. Hanbridge, the veterinarian I had mentioned. I apologize for the short notice but his soonest availability is tomorrow at around 1:30PM. Check-up aside, an agent in his clinic should likewise be able to assist with any documentation that needs sorting out given our arrangement. Your prompt response will be appreciated.

18:54 Heeeya Doc! 😊 u sound like an e-mail. :P

18:54 But sure lol I get off work @ Arcturus school around lunch time

18:55 Is it gonna be far?

18:55 But srsly lighten up abit it’s just me we can me at the bus stop or whrvr

18:56 I’ll be hailing a taxi service from my home and will collect you from your workplace at 12:30PM. Please be on time.

18:56 PLS add me on WhatsUpp through this number PLS omg I want pics of my little bby!!!! DO U FEED HIM and I can send you memes to show him so he’ll laugh LOL

18:56 LOL wtf ‘collect’

“It was Diana.”

Sucy cocked an eyebrow, “’Diana’?”

“I have a vet trip with Toby tomorrow!” Akko buzzed. “Oh bother, now I’m never going to get any sleep.”

“Is she for real?” Sucy indifferently pointed towards Akko while speaking to Lotte. “She’s like some ‘instant-friendship’ anomaly. Even I feel personally victimized.”

Lotte only smiled. “You have to sleep lest you subject poor children to a zombie for a teacher tomorrow.”

“That’s mean!”

Akko shared a laugh with Lotte, urging her to carry on with her story. They were getting to the good part—Edmund was about to confess!

One successful synopsis reading and a few topic changes later, Akko’s phone had buzzed once more.

It was a picture.

She squealed so hard her cheeks hurt.

“Akko, down! Yes—I see him—stop screaming or else I’m going to poison your drink.”

The driver pulled up at Arcturus School’s main driveway at exactly half-past noon.

“Please wait a moment.” Diana politely requested, mildly aware of the fact that she was beginning to miss the luxury of having her own car and service.

“Sure, just don’t leave me alone with that little fella, don’t matter how cute he might be.”

With a sigh—which was one of many at this point—she gently peered over to Toby whose head was poking out of the most comfortable canvas tote bag she could scavenge. It was that or nothing at all, and no, she wasn’t going to carry him in her arms.

‘Mew.’ He stared back up towards her. At least he seemed comfortable—and she tried to fight it but then she gave in and chuckled.

“Oh, come on then.”

Diana stepped out of the vehicle with Toby in tow. She pulled out her phone, putting a call through for the latest addition in her phonebook.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

Typical. She wasn’t picking up.

Fortunately she had anticipated this, there was a half-hour allowance in her schedule. Instead of bombarding the brunette with several missed calls, she opted to walk towards what looked like the waiting area where children were fetched. She took a moment to look around, noticing that the school grounds had an abundance of trees—much like the rest of Blytonbury and the campus of LNU. The morning classes were dismissed and children ran about. A few of them began to notice her special baggage, and one little girl ran up to her and nearly hugged her legs.

She had hazel eyes, and big, goofy grin. “You’re so pretty!”

Diana blinked. “Thank you.”

“Is that a cat?”

“Yes.” She lowered the bag a little, appreciating the wonder in the little girl’s voice. “But I can’t let you pet him yet, I’m afraid. He still bites.”

“But I—”

The little girl was cut-off by the sounded children cheering. Diana followed her line of sight and saw…

Akko.

She was playing music. And laughing. But more than that—everyone around her was smiling just as bright. Children sang while they danced in a circle around her, clapping their hands to the beat of what sounded like a ridiculously complicated rendition of the ABCs on the violin. The pace was quick while she played a progression of eight and sixteenth notes. The feel of the song was less classical and more like an upbeat Celtic dance.

And dance they did. Laughing, and clapping, and bouncing around in mirth without a care in the world.

Akko played with such joy and passion that Diana could feel the warmth from several meters away. She kept still—already forgetting her earlier dismay on being behind schedule—and simply watched.

“Do you know her?” The little girl with hazel eyes asked in a small voice.

Diana nodded, smiling to herself while trying to wrap her head around the conundrum that was Atsuko Kagari—who had red eyes, who tripped over nothing and scraped her knee, who could barely make it to her classes on time and yet could bewitch a crowd with a smile and a bit of music.

“She’s…”

Even Toby looked he was watching.

“…my friend.”

end chapter

A/N: Hello everyone! Hope you're doing well, stayin' safe and staying home. So anyway here's another chapter and admittedly I only have a very rough outline of where I want this story to be and well... I like writing one shots because I'm REALLY bad at plotting out longer stuff like seriously, when I started this, I thought it would be 5 chapters long at most and yet here's chapter 5.

So I've decided to just go with it and take the time to explore and narrate the relationships/interactions I've got in my head AND I don't know anything about taking care of cats I AM SORRY IT PROBABLY SHOWS

Hope you're enjoying it so far! (AND I still owe Diana a happy birthday fic that may or may not involve feet due to some shenaginas I've seen on tumblr which I don't know if are jokes or not)

#Diakko #Dianakko #Diana Cavendish #Atsuko Kagari #Akko Kagari #Diana x Akko #LWA #AU #Little Witch Academia #Charoix #Chariot du Nord #Croix Meridies #Fluff #Fanfic #Luna Nova #Sucy Manbaravan #Lotte Yanson

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obliviatestudies · 5 years ago

Text

uni and college freshman prep

hey everyone! soooo, many of you may already know, but i am going to be going into first-year university this fall. to be more specific, orientation week starts september 3rd, and my first week of classes start the week after that on the 9th. so i have just under a month to be all settled and ready for the next big life event.

i’m sure many of you are also starting uni this year, so i decided to compile a list of things that can be done in order to prepare both mentally and physically for uni or college, and basically just have a smooth and happy start!

in no particular order:

buy completely new supplies.

this is a whole new event in your life, it’s not high school and it sure as heck isn’t elementary school. start off this new chapter of your life and education, and even your career with brand new notebooks, pencils, pens, a planner, etc. this will help to get you into that new atmosphere headspace, also if you have stationery that you like and makes you happy, it will further motivate you to take better notes, stay more focused and get you first few classes off to a breezy start

start a planner.

if you do not already use a planner, or bullet journal or the like, please go. buy. a planner. if there was a year where you would not need a planner more, it is this year. start managing your time and creating small daily schedules and to-do lists before you start school. this way when you have more to do and manage, you will already be in that habit and it will be easier to fall into a good routine. a planner will also help you keep track of everything. legit. everything. your daily classes, when projects are due, when there are quizzes, tests, exams. when you have an appointment and when you have time to chill and relax. just trust me and get into the planning habits now, it will make your life so much easier.

make your space welcoming.

whether you’re staying in a dorm, apartment, or you’re commuting from home change up the space and make it a place that you enjoy being in, whether it’s buying the odd new decor piece or changing the lay out of your room,. also, if it’s possible make you bedroom/living space separate from your studying and work space. this will allow your bedroom to be a more relaxing environment and not be clouded with the stresses of school. then you can also make your workroom a space that can be inviting for you to study in, a placed that promotes productivity and good work.

gather all of your previous notes.

ok, so this is a big one. you know all of those notes that you may or may not have kept, and you thought you would never need again? yeah, go grab those and organize them into an easily readable and accessible place. the ones that you will need the most will depend on the program you’re taking. ex. i have first year bio and chem, so i need to make sure my grade 11 & 12 chem and bio notes are accessible. they will not often do a “review” in uni courses, but there may be concepts that you previously learnt that you need to know that will not be in your first year textbooks.

be open to meeting people.

i know this is something that i struggle with, but basically i just try to keep reminding myself that everyone is in the same boat and wants to make friends because they don’t know anyone. in short, just try to make some new friends and meet people before your classes start. this will be helpful for studying, getting notes from a lecture that you may have had to miss, etc.

try something new.

during your orientation week or maybe even before join a new club, or enrol in a class that you think seems interesting but maybe you would’ve have taken otherwise. i know many of you including myself are already out of your comfort zones, but getting involved and trying new things are what is going to make your uni/college experience better.

have your timetable + courses set.

please, please, please do not leave picking and finalizing your courses to the last minute! this is just a recipe for extra stress. the earlier you can have both our courses and timetable set, the better. this way you can familiarize yourself with where your classes are and the campus of your school in order to get around.

be as mentally and physically healthy as you can.

make those last doctors appointments, take extra vitamins, do everything you can to make sure that you are not sick for at least the first week of school. i know for me this means taking extra vitamin C, going to bed a little earlier than i would like. maybe booking some last-minute therapy sessions and just getting into a good mental space before school begins.

do something fun before you start!

ok, so this one isn’t really uni prep, but, it’s your last summer before uni/college, so make sure to do some fun things before you get bombed with homework and stress. maybe take off some more time at work (if you have a part-time job) to be able to go out and do things with friends. i just suggest that whatever you think is fun and is going to relax you before school starts, do that! for me, i’ve always wanted to go to a drive-in, so i’m going to do that, and i also live right near a lot of hiking trails so i’m going to do a sunrise hike!

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i know i really needed to sit down and plan this out for myself, so i’m hoping this helps some of you out as well. also, feel free to reblog and add anything to the list that you think will help all of us out! (especially advice from higher year uni/college students!)

please feel free to message me if you have any questions! you can also find me on YouTube and Instagram (Vanessa Tiiu)

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masterhandss · 5 years ago

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WATCH ME RAMBLE ABOUT THE HAMEHURA SPINOFF

My Next Life as a Villainess! All Routes Lead to Doom! have officially taken over my headspace, and I really want a platform to talk about it. I’ve read the manga and novels over and over again, and I’m so happy to seeing the reactions of everyone to each anime episodes.

Though surprisingly, other than obviously the original novel, what actually piqued my interest in the series is actually the spinoff manga for hamehura, “I Reincarnated into an Otome Game as a Villainess With Only Destruction Flags... In a Dire Situation!? Verge of Destruction Arc”. Yes, it has a spinoff.

(This might be considered spoilers for the spinoff and anime, be warned!) I just want to ramble about it and give my critiques, opinions and expectations. My words might not make sense if you haven’t read the spinoff, but I think having a general gist of the events of the original anime/novel/manga is enough to read through my vents and rambles. also there’s screenshots here so there’s that.

It’s basically the same plot as the anime, but if Katarina regained her memories of her past life during the events of Fortune Lover, within the school year, instead of when she was 8 years old like the original novel.

I don’t even really know if I’m in the right place to comment on it, considering it only has like 6 chapters (with the 7th one still being a month away) anyways and has a lot of time to expand and grow it’s concept, but gosh darn it, I want to talk about it!

I really really love the premise of the spinoff, and i think it’s much more compelling than the original novel. The novel wins by being more wholesome and heartfelt, but with the spinoff, we get to see Katarina play this “game” in hard mode” where she doesn’t have the connections that she would’ve had if she remembered sooner. There’s a sense of urgency in the plot that you don’t really have in the novel because she had already won everyone over before the game even begins. Both premises are charming, but this one really lifts up the concept of the title.

While I’d love to say that i’m excited to see this alternate version of the plot and find out how Katarina would solve herself out of her destruction, sadly the spinoff still follows the original material very religiously, preventing the spinoff as really coming out into its own (again, I could be wrong, there’s only 6 chapters so far after all but from what we have so far, it’s practically identical to the manga/novel).

I think one of the greatest strengths of the spinoff is that it would take it’s time in the Magic School because Katarina only has one year to put the odds in her favor, instead of years, so it means we wont speed through her school life like the novel/anime/manga did.

This is why my favorite part of the spinoff is Sienna, Katarina’s main underling when she was still the villainess of Fortune Lover. I love her because her existence provides a reason for the writer of the spinoff to find ways to insert her into the original plot, or to write new ones altogether in order to include what I imagine to be Katarina’s new best friend in this timeline.

Sienna’s existing can also be a sign of a possible future conflict regarding Katarina’s behavior post-accident. In the original novel/manga, it was okay for the snobby and spoiler Katarina to suddenly become dense and gluttonous, because she was 8 years old, and thus in the eyes of the adults, still had a lot of time to grow and develop her character. It’s still weird of course but it can be written off as such. With the event happening during the events of Fortune Lover, characters such as Maria and Geordo are obviously confused but her change of heart. Personally, I’d love to see her underlings and other students call her out on her behavior (especially since we are about to see the dynamic of Keith and Katarina in this timeline) because of how abrupt and sudden this change was. The spinoff tries to run away from this problem by writing off Mary and Alan as “not knowing much about Katarina other than rumors” but I doubt it, considering how much they would probably encounter each other in social gatherings and such. For them to not have an independent impression of her seems lazy to me to be honest, because not having an opinion on her means that she can act in any way that she wants and it can be considered as her being normal to them.

Because of how faithful this spinoff is to the original material, the banter that characters would have about Katarina feels undeserved, such as Geordo being possessive of Katarina during her interactions with Alan, despite not being interested in her until now. Bare in mind that at this point, Geordo had already met Maria (who piqued his interest during their first encounter, according to Katarina in the original novel) and only just gained interest in her fiance because of her out-of-nowhere change in personality. the banter between the twin princes doesn’t feel right when you factor in that he doesn’t care about Katarina enough (yet) to find his brother as a threat. To be honest, I wouldn’t even have this problem if the spinoff wasn’t so loyal.

This also opens up the question of how she will gain rapport with the characters in Fortune Lover. The spinoff pulled off Mary and Katarina’s friendship through their similar interests in gardening, but without the mistake of taking Alan’s in game dialogue, Mary has no reason to be attached to Katarina at all, and is definitely in love with Alan.

I mean i’d be okay if the spinoff writes off their relationship as just friends, but then again that ruins the charm that the original novel had (which is that Katarina catches love interests like she does with pokemon) which can be both a good thing and a bad thing (I don’t mind if they don’t have the harem, but maybe that makes it too far from the source material idk)

This is why I don’t want the spinoff to be religiously loyal to the source material! Keith’s introduction makes me nervous because there is absolutely no way that the spinoff can follow the original method of winning him over without making it look ridiculous, so obviously his route will have to be written from scratch. It’s not the rewrite that makes me nervous, it’s how similar it’d be from the original novel. The same would have to happen with Sophia (who has probably lived in fear and isolation without a real friend FOR YEARS), Nicol (who is intertwined with his sister), and Alan (depending on how far Maria is into the plot). From what i’ve seen from the spinoff so far, Katarina can still realistic gain the character’s of Fortune Lover as her allies, but they won’t be (or atleast might not be) as attached to her as they do in the original novel (like Mary and Sophia maybe)

My only biased exception to this is her and her maid Anne, because it’s pretty endearing to know that even the spoiled version of Katarina is still attached to Anne, so as long as they are together, she doesn’t really mind the difference.

I would really love it if Katarina could gain allies outside of the established cast, to emphasize how different her situation is now that her circumstances are different due to the time of when her memories return. I just don’t want the spinoff to suddenly make the characters interested in Katarina, even though she’s lived her life until now as a spoiled and selfish noble.

This brings me to another concern of mine: Maria, the protagonist of Fortune Lover. So far, Katarina has already won over her friendship and has forgiven her and Sienna for their actions against her after seeing their efforts to fend off other harassers. My problem isn’t really how quickly she got won over or anything (despite this already solving her problem of being accused of orchestrating her bullying that could cause her end just before the final graduation event of the game), it’s more of what she represents.

You see, what made all the characters of Fortune Lover so attached to Katarina is that she lacks the outlook of a noble, being someone who lived as a normal school girl before being reincarnated. She is a very empathetic person who is able to sooth the worries of the characters but literally not seeing it at all (examples being Alan with his rivalry with his twin, and Mary & Sophia with their appearance). She alleviates the pain and worries of others by being what they need. In the original novel of My Next Life as a Villainess!, the readers/viewers already know that her villainess fate is already thwarted because she had already accomplished what Maria was supposed to do during the events of Fortune Lover (befriend Sophia = gain Nicol’s affections / interest Geordo = gain his affection / differentiate Alan & Geordo = gain Alan’s affections / be a first real source of comfort and company = gain Keith’s affections etc.)

I can’t really speculate on much of the plot of the game, but luckily the anime dvd box comes with the actual Fortune Lover game routes of the 4 boys so I might be able to comment on this better in the future.

Maria is basically the same as Katarina (or Bakarina, if its less confusing); both characters are outsiders to the world of nobles and royalty, and it’s through their own personal outlook that they help and befriend the characters of the game. The spinoff would probably stick the two by the hip now that they’re friends in order to solve this problem, but it’s basically a race between the two of which of them can apply their personal quirks in getting the characters to ally with them. Again I can’t really speculate bc I don’t know the actual routes of the boys, but yeah.

For example, Geordo has met the heroine while she was trying to climb a tree with a skirt, which he has never seen before, while her also being the pretty light-magic user commoner, and this definitely made her interesting to him (Note: this is an event that occurs canonically within the events of the game, Fortune Lover, but is not presented as something that had occurred in the manga).

Now we have Katarina acting out of character and eating tons of sweets, while trying to salvage the dress of her peer after she spilled a drink on it, and this character change made her interesting to him as well. Katarina, considering her actual personality as time progresses in the story, is definitely much more interesting than Maria’s (I say that with biases of course) so Geordo would most likely find her to be the more unpredictable and interesting out of the two, but it looks like the only way (or what seems to already be the chosen way??) of writing the spinoff out of this mess is to make it appear like the Maria event didn’t or hasn’t happened yet, because while the original novel does state that Geordo would have fallen for Maria if he wasn’t already inlove with Katarina before they entered the Magic School, Geordo has yet to address his relationship with Maria. (yeah I get it there’s only 6 chapters yet jhgsdgfjsdg BUT STILL IT’S A LOT TO THINK ABOUT)

I don’t know what kind of dynamic Maria and Katarina would have in the spinoff, especially since you need to factor in Sienna, but in the original novel, Maria was pretty submissive to Katarina and would mostly just follow her lead. Maybe with this new friendship, Maria might not actively approach the main love interests (unless it’s by accident, since they don’t have to always save her from bullying Katarina and Sienna already try to solve that themselves) which gives time for Katarina to win them over with the quirky personality. At least, this is what I hope the spinoff goes for lol. (side note, it’s actually interesting to see what it’s like when Geordo literally only uses Katarina as a shield from other women, so when the shift from tool to romance occurs, i think it’ll be pretty nice to see)

To be honest I don’t even know what I’m rambling about, I’m sure I’ll love the spinoff regardless of what direction it takes lol. I’m just nervous because I really really love this concept an I want it to be different from the source material because it literally has the potential to be its own story (idk if this spinoff is even official at all, like I think it has the permission of Yamaguchi Satoru, but idk if its licensed)

Before I end this long ramble, I just want to note that i actual like the art style of the spinoff (illustrated by nishi) more than the original artist nami. I feel like this more simple artstyle captures the shift between Villainess Katarina and Bakarina more smoothly, while the original illustrations kinda makes it looked forced (mostly the manga tbh, the novel covers and art is fine). With nishi’s art, you can easily grasp that these two personalities are both Katarina.

Anyways that’s it, my hands hurt lol. Might edit this in the future.

#hamefura #hamehura #My Next Life as a Villainess #destruction flag otome #Otome Game no Hametsu Flag shika Nai Akuyaku Reijou ni Tensei shiteshimatta #Otome Game no Hametsu Flag shika nai Akuyaku Reijou ni Tensei shite shimatta... Zettai Zetsumei!#I Reincarnated into an Otome Game as a Villainess With Only Destruction Flags... In a Dire Situation!? Verge of Destruction Arc #My Next Life as a Villainess! All Routes Lead to Doom!#Bakarina #Bakarina Alter #sorry if this is random and dumb #i wanted to vent lol #mh talks #Maria Campbell #Katarina Claes

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artificialqueens · 4 years ago

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Nostalgia, Part 4 (Rujubee) - Dartmouth420

nostalgia is a series that follows the re-ignition of raven/jujubee’s friendship (with benefits) while jujubee competes on all stars five and raven is working on set. there will be one chapter for every episode of AS5 where jujubee appears. drag names used with male pronouns.

summary: Jujubee is not going to be in the bottom this week due to a damn curse, thank you very much. But messing with other people’s feelings is never a good idea… because his own tend to get caught up in it too.

a/n: i had writers block but then i recovered by listening to hit the back by king princess like twenty times in a row lmao. enjoy the side mizbee (crackjubee?) also this is not how negotiating a dom/sub relationship should go in real life my friends, this is one hundred percent pure fantasy.

tw: dom/sub dynamics, mild daddy kink, mild choking, jealousy, smut

The day wasn’t going particularly well.

Jujubee was very much not appreciating the ‘challenge winner one week, bottom two the next’ curse that loomed over him. The challenge was improv and while Jujubee was confident in his improv skills he was feeling a little chagrined at the production’s decision to group together the queens with the most conflict. But whatever, this wasn’t RuPaul’s Best Friend’s Race, after all. Ha.

But Cracker decided that once again he needed to make a speech about however the hell he was feeling towards Blair. Blair took it in stride and Jujubee watched the whole thing like a tennis match. These little white boys needed to get their damn selves under control. Jujubee re-focused on the task at hand.

Luckily they broke from filming for lunch soon afterwards. Everyone ate and bitched and complained.

Movement caught Jujubee’s eye, and of course, there was Raven sauntering into the break room like he owned the place. He made a beeline to Jujubee, who nodded and opened his mouth to say hello. But with an extra little swing of his hips, Raven changed direction at the last moment and went over to Mayhem, whom he gave a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“I’ve been missing you bitch, it’s been too long!” said Raven, an arm around Mayhem, radiating charm.

The two of them were friends, considered Jujubee, shutting his mouth and taking in the surprised and pleased look on Mayhem’s face. They chatted back and forth for a couple minutes until Raven glanced over his shoulder at Jujubee, and then went over to speak to Shea.

“What you’re doing on the runway is everything,” complimented Raven, with a flirtatious little shake of his shoulders.

Jujubee raised an eyebrow. Raven was laying it on a bit thick.

“Thanks?” responded Shea, slightly confused, flashing Raven a smile, “Can I expect good reviews on FPR?”

“I’ll see how I feel in eight months, honey.” That stupid little tilt of Raven’s head. Shea’s wonderful laugh.

Raven gave Jujubee a knowing side-eyed look and then went over to Blair. Mayhem and Shea, Jujubee could understand, but he knew that Raven did not have an established rapport with Blair. Blair seemed surprised and vaguely taken aback by Raven, who asked him how filming was going and nodded understandingly to his answer and delicately touched the younger man’s back.

Well, now Jujubee was disgruntled. And pissed off about being disgruntled, because Jujubee did not lose his gruntle easily, thank you very much.

But two could play at this game. Jujubee glanced over to Cracker and India.

“… I just don’t know, I’m feeling fucking weird-” continued Cracker to India, who was nodding. Jujubee had to do something about this because he was not going to lose the challenge. Cracker needed to calm the fuck down, stat, and Jujubee could certainly manage that if he played his cards right. Succeeding in the competition was way more important than whatever the hell Raven was playing at.

“Hey,” said Jujubee, going over to Cracker, who was anxiously running his hands through his already-greasy hair again, “Come here for a minute, I need to talk to you.”

Jujubee glanced over at Raven who was watching him, a slight frown on his face as he half-nodded to what Blair was saying. Then Jujubee turned and left, Cracker in tow, feeling Raven’s eyes on his back all the way out.

Jujubee quickly made his way through the backstage area to the hallway where Raven had led him during that first week of filming. A PA stopped him and asked what he was doing but Jujubee waved her off with the excuse that they were heading outside for a smoke break. Cracker followed him silently.

“You need to calm the fuck down,” said Jujubee, opening the door to the disused equipment room where he and Raven had had such a lovely time, and motioned with his head. Cracker went in ahead of him, a suspicious look on his face. Jujubee flicked the light and shut the door.

Cracker looked around, “I’m trying, alright? I don’t know why I have all this drama out of the blue, but the challenge-”

“Look I’ve been doing this for a long time, it’s not that complicated,” stated Jujubee, “You’re funny. I’m funny. Blair’s a baby with a billion Instagram followers. We’re professionals, we can do this, and at the end of the day it’s just a damn TV show, so relax.”

“Yeah, I- okay,” said Cracker, nodding to him, gritting his teeth, “I can relax.”

That was just about the least relaxed statement Jujubee had ever heard in his life.

But perhaps words weren’t the best way to go about this. Perhaps Cracker just needed someone else to take charge. Bizarrely deciding to trust Raven’s statement from the other night in his hotel room, Jujubee went for it.

“That doesn’t sound very relaxed, girl!” laughed Jujubee, comfortable, “But maybe I can help you out with that…”

Now Cracker looked confused, and glanced around the room again, before his brown eyes landed back on Jujubee’s. And there was a little bit of intrigue, wasn’t there?

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying…?” said Cracker, inclining his chin.

“Stay quiet and don’t be a little bitch about it,” said Jujubee, allowing the dominant tone to slip into his voice. Clear, expectant, authoritative.

Cracker quirked an eyebrow in response, an interested smile growing.

Very pleased that things were going his way, Jujubee stepped forward and knelt in front of Cracker. Cracker took in a breath and gave Jujubee a quick nod of confirmation and Jujubee unbuckled Cracker’s belt, pulling his pants them down around his thighs and made straight for the rapidly hardening cock in his briefs. Interesting.

Aiming for efficiency, Jujubee got Cracker’s cock out, gave it an appreciative look and swirled his tongue around the tip, earning a very aroused noise from Cracker. Jujubee took it in his mouth and went to work.

“Oh, fuck,” muttered Cracker, the muscles in his thighs tensing. He didn’t seem to know what to do with his hands. Jujubee didn’t particularly like being touched while he gave head, but Cracker didn’t seem like the type to touch without asking, and he refrained from doing so, keeping his hands to himself.

Jujubee worked Cracker’s cock enthusiastically, and gripped his ass with his left hand and a little thrill grew in his gut. This was fun, quick and dirty and hopefully it would lead him to his end goal, which was getting Cracker to chill the fuck out so they could win this challenge together.

It wasn’t quite as much fun as face-fucking Raven in drag, but he really shouldn’t be comparing…

Soon enough Cracker’s breath was ragged, and he whispered, “I’m gonna come-”

Jujubee briefly considered the fact that he hadn’t properly prepared for this, and there weren’t any great options other than to just swallow. It wasn’t his favourite thing, but it would have to do for today.

Cracker let out a filthy groan, and Jujubee took it and swallowed, and then he moved back, wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood. Cracker was still recovering, tucking his cock back into his briefs, and re-buckling his belt with a shaking hand.

“Woah,” said Cracker, with a quick shake of his head, “That was good.”

“You feeling more relaxed, baby?” teased Jujubee.

“Yeah, actually,” murmured Cracker, “Maybe I was just pent up…”

Jujubee gave him an affectionate pat on the shoulder and then opened the door and glanced outside. There was no one in the hallway, so they left together.

That had been pretty fun, considered Jujubee as he followed Cracker back down the hallway to their break area, and he’d heard rumours of Cracker’s other talents in the bedroom. This could become a sensible arrangement. It wasn’t like Jujubee needed Raven, after all. Raven was chaotic, and he wasn’t even on the show this season. He was in an entirely different headspace than Jujubee and his fellow contestants.

Just as they were rounding the corner back to the break room, movement caught Jujubee’s eye again. He glanced through an open doorway into the makeup studio to see Raven look up, and give him a very pointed glare before returning to furiously brushing out a big blonde wig.

Jujubee didn’t say anything, nor did he stop. Raven’s feelings were his own problem, and Jujubee couldn’t let this nonsense get to him. But he did feel sorry for that poor wig.

Jujubee’s team performed excellently in the challenge and Jujubee felt pretty damn good about it. Almost having a little in-drag make out session with Cracker was pretty fun too, and Jujubee found he liked Cracker a lot better when his confidence was up.

The next day was the runway. Jujubee realized while watching everyone else get ready that perhaps his outfit was a bit minimal in comparison. Nonetheless, he thought it looked sleek and expensive, and the matching nails, clutch and shoes were a nice touch. But whatever.

Cracker won the challenge. Jujubee placed high as well and privately allowed himself a sigh of relief. He’d broken the curse, at least for tonight.

After the critiques they all trooped off the runway, and Jujubee affectionately touched Cracker’s back on the way out.

“Congratulations on the win, bitch,” whispered Jujubee into Cracker’s ear.

“Thanks,” he replied, “I think you’re owed it too.”

“Ah, I barely did anything.”

Cracker snorted, “You got me to relax, do you know how hard that is? I’ve led several doctors to burnout.”

“Looks like all you needed to be prescribed was a decent blowjob.”

Cracker chuckled and Jujubee followed him, last in line. The queens moved through to the backstage, going past where they filmed Untucked for the regular season into the area with the moveable walls that made up the hallway. There was a stretch where the crew was sparse, the cameras guys going ahead. A gap between two walls was ahead on Jujubee’s left. The PA behind him turned, pressing his headset, summoned back to the runway area.

A hand closed around Jujubee’s wrist and yanked him into the gap between the walls. Jujubee yelped in shock and then recovered his balance as he saw Raven before him in the dark alcove, six feet of petulant anger.

“Why are you flirting with him?” demanded Raven.

“The fuck?” managed Jujubee, yanking his wrist out of Raven’s grip, “Why are you pulling me out of the end of the line like some girl who’s the first to die in a horror movie?”

Raven ignored his question and asked another, “What was that, yesterday?”

Jujubee took a moment before answering. This seemed to be developing in a way that wasn’t ideal. First of all, he was in the middle of filming. Second of all, Raven’s behaviour had impulsive, chaotic, bratty bitch written all over it.

“You’re acting crazy,” stated Jujubee.

“Cracker’s the most annoying one of the lot-”

“I’m not gonna dignify this bullshit with an answer-” replied Jujubee, making to head back between the halls into the hallway. Usually there’d be a camera person or somebody in this little alcove, but-

“No, wait,” said Raven, and his tone had changed. No longer whiny and entitled, but serious.

“What?” demanded Jujubee, turning back to him, irritated. Just when Jujubee was fed up with Raven’s bullshit, he would change his tune. And it worked every time. He should really just leave-

“If we’re going to do this then I don’t want you fucking around with anybody else like, here,” stated Raven, crossing his arms, expression serious.

“What do you mean, this?”

“You know what I mean, this, this thing that always happens between us.”

Jujubee straightened and gazed at Raven imperiously, “You’re the one who suggested I fuck around with Cracker in the first place, and now you’re jealous?”

Raven rolled his eyes.

“Because I remember yesterday,” continued Jujubee, “When you were all over everybody at the lunch break, glancing over your shoulder making sure I was noticing you. You were trying to make me jealous, or some nonsense?”

“Well, it obviously backfired…” said Raven, giving Jujubee a self-deprecating half-smile, “I just wanted to get you riled up. You know why.”

Ah, of course that had been Raven’s angle. To be behave badly, to make Jujubee jealous and riled up so that he’d want to punish him the next time they interacted. Oh, it had worked on All Stars One, that’s for sure, and even way back on Season Two. They’d both been exhausted, stressed out messes, but still, Raven had always wanted to play. They were repeating some very old patterns here, Jujubee couldn’t do anything but shake his head.

“Bitch, you could’ve just said that.”

“Well-”

“No, seriously,” said Jujubee, gesticulating with frustration at the ridiculousness of it all, “Why the fuck are we standing in this hole in the hall talking about it? We’ve been doing this on and off for years, just admit that you want it. You want me to get dominant and possessive over you, and I want to punish you and fuck you silly. It’s not that complicated!”

Raven paused for a moment. Then he nodded and shrugged, leaning back against the wall and looking at Jujubee with a lazy, inviting expression, “Yes ma'am, you’re right. That’s exactly what I want.”

A thrill went down Jujubee’s spine, cutting through his irritation. Here they were, right in the middle of filming, between some fucking movable walls, sliding back into this dynamic. It was so easy, every time. Fuck, he should really just go, but-

Instead of leaving like a sensible human, Jujubee stepped froward and traced his long red nails down the side of Raven’s face. Raven practically shivered under his touch. Jujubee traced his jaw and then caressed Raven’s neck. A little sweat under his fingers, some stubble just beginning to grow back in.

Jujubee dug his sharp nails into Raven’s throat. Raven flinched, and let out an absolutely shameless moan under his breath.

“You have to give me respect,” ordered Jujubee, standing straight, holding eye contact, gaze steady, “When we’re in the same room you don’t even so much as look at anyone else.”

“Yes ma'am.”

“When I’m around you’re mine. You’re my bitch.”

“Yes, daddy,” replied Raven, running his tongue over his teeth.

“That’s right.”

Jujubee tightened his grip for a split second and then stepped back with a laugh and the moment was broken. Raven blinked a couple times, and stepped forward, picking a speck of fluff off Jujubee’s wig.

“Right, okay,” said Raven, smoothing out Jujubee’s camo-lined cape on his shoulders and looking him over approvingly, “Mmm, you look sleek. I love doing this when you’re in drag.”

“Why do I put up with you?” asked Jujubee, raising an eyebrow.

Raven leaned forward and whispered into Jujubee’s ear, with a tickle of warm breath, “Because I’m the best you’ve ever had, Cracker doesn’t hold up and you know it.”

“He has a real nice ass, actually-”

“Ugh, stop it!” replied Raven, bratty demeanour returning as he pulled back. The pink marks from Jujubee’s nails were apparent on his neck, but Jujubee hadn’t pressed hard enough to actually hurt him, let alone break the skin. It was satisfying to see them there nonetheless. They had a tendency to leave marks on each other, both visible and invisible.

“Get over yourself.”

Raven whined in response, and then he laughed, “Fuck. It’s always like this, isn’t it? Who was it I was trying to make you jealous with last time around? Manila?”

Jujubee laughed and the nostalgia tugged at him, but he held off indulging in the memory. There had been many petty disagreements all those years ago, but they were either jokes or water under the bridge now. They’d have time to reminisce later, if it came up.

“Come up to my hotel room in a couple days.”

“I’d love that.”

A voice from the hallway, “Anybody got eyes on Jujubee?”

It must be a producer. Uh oh. Jujubee craned his neck, glancing into the hallway.

“Ah shit, sorry-” murmured Raven, finally seeming embarrassed.

“I’ve gotta get back out there now, before they notice us,” whispered Jujubee.

Raven gently pushed Jujubee’s arm, “Go. I’ll hide out for a minute.”

Jujubee slipped back out into the hallway and made himself known, and was hustled away by some stressed-out crew member. Raven stayed hidden, presumably until the hallway was empty, and Jujubee didn’t bother looking back. Instead he reflected on what they’d both just admitted to, and seemed to have established between them.

Later on Morgan wiped the floor with Cracker during the lip-sync, and somehow they both won (that would have to be made up later in the editing, considered Jujubee) and Mayhem was sent home. Jujubee would miss him. The queens were dropping like flies, but he fully intended to be the last one standing.

The special little arrangement he had with Raven on the side would only add to his fun.

#rpdr fanfiction #rujubee #jujubee #raven #miz cracker #smut #canon compliant #jealousy #nostalgia #dartmouth420 #tw dom/sub dynamics #tw mild daddy kink #tw mild choking #submission #on set fic #as5 #s2

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