#but talia is gomez

[aeturnum-mendacacium]

Bruce(in training in the LOA) waking up with a new ring on his finger every morning, confused: ??????????

Talia trying to figure out what ring Bruce likes the best when she proposes to him(they haven't met yet): *scribbling down in notebook* okay not that one either

+

Ra's -also obsessed with him : are ya winning (him over yet) daughter?

[bruciemilf]

Bruce: We didn’t even have a proper wedding, we just went to the courthouse on a Tuesday.

Talia: The judge sentenced me to life with no chance of parole :)

Bruce: You begged me to marry you.

Talia: It’s true, I did

[gotham-snark]

"You're not Talia. Talia smells of Jasmine and Rose of Taif"

[smallandangry24]

To keep up with the trend:

Me and the bad bitch I pulled by being autistic:

Honorable Mention: Bruce Wayne

[150151]

talia and bruce could be the morticia and gomez of DC but the writers won't let them be great

like look at the material !!

[ozs-twink-boytoy]

Today on... Straight Couples that drive me unwell...

[soulsista04]

mischa kneeling while his wife is doing goddess things is just so correct

[soupinaboot]

Bruce and Talia are like Morticia and Gomez but Bruce is Morticia and Talia is Gomez, do you see my vision????

[entiretorridaffair]

I JUST WANT TO LOOK LIKE CLAUDIA COOK GOMEZ. PLEASE.

[plotwholls]

I need a found footage compilation of Brucie Wayne having miniature mental breakdowns in places he assumed were private enough for him to scream through his teeth, captured moments where he realizes he’s getting richer, cuts from interviews where he struggles to maintain his cool when interviewers make jokes about how it’s “like you’re trying to go broke!” and he laughs really fake and says “still trying!!1!” and it’s just titled Brucie Wayne failing to Stop Being Rich for 45 minutes and it’s actually 50:10 minutes. The last five minutes are his children bullying him for being so rich on live TV and dragging him for failing to go from Prince to Pauper. The last ten seconds are dedicated to a meme comparing Brucie to Gomez Addams.

Plot armor but it’s Bruce Wayne’s wealth.

Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.

He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked “#1 worker-friendly corporation”, and productively and profits soar again.

Ok, so clearly investing his workers isn’t the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.

But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WE’s new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.

Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.

Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.

So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because they’ve been claiming all these measures he’s implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and they’re finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyone’s eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. That’ll go well, right?

Gotham’s infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.

Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city is….Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gotham’s infrastructure somehow increases WE’s profits.

Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (it’s not his fault the best administrative system software is WE—he looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.

Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.

Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.

Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. It’s so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce can’t even donate to his own charity.

But by this time, Bruce has children. If he can’t get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?

Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, won’t touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and won’t legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richard’s footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruce’s wealth. And she won’t even accept a trust fund of only one million.

Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then he’s at least not have the money.

So children—generous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, children—are also out.

Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the world’s superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroes—but the public can’t know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.

At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.

The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.

Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.

All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.

Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.

But by GOD is he trying.

[lazycats-stuff]

Male reader who’s Ra’s immortal enemies- to lovers- to friends - to annoyances - to married - to divorced - to friends - to I’ve known you for so long that I could stab you and I’d peck you on the cheek and you’d stab me with the same knife and kiss me till I pass out.

Kinda like Gomez and Morticia but Male reader is called grandma as a joke but after 3 centuries it kinda just stuck so he checks up on the league every 2 decades only to find Ra’s in a fight with the bats and just kinda gets a chair and watches before Dusan or Talia comes and says “MOTHER-!?” “Oh hey I brought snacks”

Oh my God, this sounds great. Lets do it. I may also added Damian calling the reader grandma. I just wanted to.

Summary: (Y/N) and Ra's know each other for a long time.

Warnings: both are a power couple, I swear, mentions of killing, stabbing each other, loving one another, a whole lot of relationships with this.

(Y/N) and Ra's al Ghul go a very long way back. Extremely long. About 400 years to be more specific. The two started off as enemies. And since the two were essentially immortal with the Lazarus pit. The two have killed each other more times they could count. It was stress relief almost for them both.

And they enjoyed the games they have played. Hunting each other down, trying to kill the other, the adrenaline pumping through your veins. Not to mention, the bragging rights from (Y/N)'s side. It's no easy feat to kill Ra's al Ghul. And Ra's would strike back. It's a good way to get some stress out, just like said before.

But over time, something else grew and the two became lovers, loving each other fiercely. It was a love story for the ages, as the two would joke. In modern terms, they would be a true power couple. Both of them strong in their own right and if they are separated, they can both hold on their own. And if together?

True meaning of terror and fear in their world.

And they were a power couple for a long time.

But sooner than later, love started to fizzle out. And while they were married, they became friends. It was nice to have a friend in Ra's, despite being a killer and everything in between. Ra's is a loyal friend, the one who wouldn't betray you for anything. That's what (Y/N) knew at least. Of course, that same courtesy came from (Y/N).

Safe to say, the two were loyal to each other to the bone.

And even when they entered that stage of being purely and utterly annoyed with each other, they were still loyal to the bone to each other. It was rare to find a person like that, whom you could annoy to the point of stabbing each other. Which has happen before.

(Y/N) on his knees, Ra's holding a knife implanted in (Y/N)'s stomach, both of them smiling at each other. Even kissing each other while the knife was in one of them. Talk about twisted love. (Y/N) and Ra's have been through a lot and one of the things he remembers vividly is Talia's birth. And it was one of his favorite memories. He may or may have not cried when he held Talia for the first time. It is something that has officially ingrained into his brain.

He got called mother as a result. He didn't like it at first, however, it grew on him. Soon enough, it became an inside joke and he couldn't really be mad at it. It was something... It felt like home, (Y/N) would say.

Soon enough, (Y/N) started travelling, using Ra's' money to do so? Why? Ra's has enough of it already and travelling in the best hotels in the world wouldn't make a dent in his pocket. Never has and it never will. Ra's simply handed him the credit card with a smile and a kiss.

" Go wherever your heart desires beloved. "

And he did.

He travelled a lot, seeing the world, doing what his heart desired. Of course, he stayed in contact with Ra's and Talia during his travels. He would share updates about what he saw and learned. However, he came back once he heard that his daughter was pregnant. He was essentially going to be a grandfather.

Well, he would be a grandmother as the joke from years ago would come back to bite him in the ass. And it bit him hard. While Talia's pregnancy progressed, she would often talk to the baby, talking about how he will met grandmother (Y/N). And how did (Y/N) react?

He simply scoffed, saying it's too early in the day to deal with this. It would make Talia chuckle and Ra's would smirk, enjoying the sight of his husband getting teased.

Yes, husband.

They decided to remarry because the feelings have returned to romantical ones, they were no longer platonic. They would be back to spending time together, sitting on the balcony, sipping their wines and holding hands as they were watching the sunset. It felt just like old times.

And yes, he was present when Damian was born. He may or may have not cried in private. What can he say, he just felt like he had a family. Ra's was happy too, with an heir worthy of taking over the League. Of course, the father being Bruce Wayne, Damian is more than worthy of being the Leader once Ra's no longer there.

Once Damian turned 9, (Y/N) went back to travelling the world. He enjoyed it.

It's been years since he came back from the travel. The League was oddly quiet. (Y/N) didn't think much of it and came back to take a break, bringing food and gifts for everyone. He didn't expect to see a fight breaking out, but he has decided to stand by and watch. He was too jet lagged to even think about fighting. So he waited as he ate, completely entranced into the fight. Ra's fought with ferocity against Batman.

Talia was busy with the 4 birds, Damian included. He watched his daughter fighting, impressed by her skills. Ra's has taught her very well. He took a chair and then sat down to watch. Both Ra's and Talia fought with ferociousness, using every tactic they could remember to fight off the Bats as the family was called that to shorten it up.

And (Y/N) found the nickname really funny. He leaned back into the chair, watching in fascination.

" Mother?! " Talia exclaimed, making everyone freeze.

" Grandmother?! " Damian exclaimed, but from excitement. Damian didn't see him for a long time and Talia hadn't expected him to come back yet.

Damian run to him and (Y/N) gave him a hug. He missed his grandson and once he heard that he was in Gotham, he had an urge to visit. But God only knows how Bruce would have reacted. He probably wouldn't have let in anyhow. And despite (Y/N) being an Al Ghul, he has enough respect to not break into the Manor. And he didn't want to make a bad impression on his unofficial son in law.

" Hello Damian. How are you doing? " (Y/N) asked Damian, while everyone else watched.

" I've been doing well. And you grandmother? "

" Is that really still stuck? Call me grandpa. Not grandmother. "

" I prefer grandmother. "

" Of course you do. A Robin suit? Nice. I hope Bruce is treating you well. Otherwise I'll have to turn on my protective mode, " (Y/N) said to Damian, who actually chuckled.

" I'm doing well in Gotham. "

" Good. Good... Also, I might come to visit soon. " The last part was directed at Bruce and (Y/N) wasn't going to take no for an answer. His grandson comes first. Alongside his daughter.

" Now, fighting is over. I'm jet lagged beyond belief so I would kindly ask the birds and the big bat to leave. Fight in a few weeks, I don't care. Right now, some peace and quiet sounds good, " (Y/N) has declared, making Ra's smirk.

" Of course beloved. Anything for you. " Ra's said and (Y/N) nodded, happy to have his way after the stupid jet lag.

" Good. Also, nice to meet you the rest of the birds, but I have no time to chat. " (Y/N) took his things into his hands and then left to his shared bedchambers with Ra's.

[bruciemilf]

Talia when she graphically lays out how she's gonna rail Bruce so hard he'll see heaven: >:)

Talia when Bruce calls her 'little rose/demon/love:

[gotham-snark]

"You smell of sand and sweat. My dreams have better taste"

[s-darling-art]

oh my god please post the brutalia valentines day by it self jesus I need that tattooed into my brain. THE HANDS. THE SPACE BETWEEN THEM. THE YEARNING. THE EYES. ASDFGHJKL MY BRAIN IS LEAKING OUT OF MY EARS OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD YOUR TALIA IS ALWAYS SO GOOD BUT YOUR BRUTALIA ALWAYS KILLS ME LIKE JESUS HOW DO YOU ALWAYS GET THEIR YEARNING RIGHT YOU GET THE FACT THAT THEY ARE A QUIET LOVE THAT IT IS AN AFFAIR OF THE EYES JESUS OG MY GOD WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD?!

The answer is I reference Morticia and Gomez Addams 😌😌

I just adore Talia and I have this thing where I turn every male character I touch into a lover boy. Love me a lover boy!

[redwiccanrobin]

One person said, “Bruce and Talia are the Gomez and Morticia of the DC universe.”

And the rest of us just went, “That son of a bitch is onto something!”

[froggyfics]

Strangers

People can go from people you know to people you don’t.

This can be read from the point of view of either a romantic or platonic relationship. However, I think this is even more heartbreaking if you read it from a platonic relationship perspective, because sometimes friendship breakups are sometimes just as hard :( 

I know Damian Wayne stans will come for me on this one, but I can’t help it! I feel like his personality would definitely hurt some feelings and cause problems in some relationships. 

The summary is from Selena Gomez’s song “People You Know”, which I think perfectly describes this fic!

Feedback is always appreciated. Feel free to message me privately or comment below to let me know what you think. Constructive criticism is always welcome! 

Pairing: Damian Wayne x gn!reader

Theme: Angst

Word Count: 1,567

You stop dead in your tracks. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Was that really him?

You squint slightly, examining him further. You instantly regret squinting though, because it only solidifies your hypothesis. It only confirms a recently acquired fear. A fear of seeing him in public. Up close. Alone. 

It's funny how seeing Damian used to bring you so much joy, but now, it brings you bone-chilling dread. 

Your breathing becomes abnormal. Sweat starts to precipitate in your palms and feet. Your heart skips a beat or two. 

What should you do? Should you continue in the direction that you were originally going in? Should you break out into a run? Do you keep your head down? Do you turn around? Should you wish for a black hole to swallow you up and spit you out anywhere else in this universe? Anywhere but here? Anywhere where Damian Wayne isn’t. 

His head was slightly down, as he walked with one hand in his pocket and the other scrolling through his phone. He hasn’t noticed you yet, but he was coming towards you. It would only be a matter of moments before the two of you be mere inches from one another. 

You shook your head in an attempt to get out of your trance. You knew that if Damian saw you in that moment, you would look like a deer in headlights. And then he would know. He would know in that moment that he still had an effect on you. He would know with just one look at your face that you were still hurting. He would know that you still thought of him. He would know that your heart was still broken. And if Damian knew all this, that would mean that he won. And you would be damned if you ever let Damian win again. 

It sounds childish to say, but having a relationship with Damian was like playing a game. Except you didn’t realize it was a game until your relationship disintegrated. You didn’t even know the rules, but Damian did, and he made sure that he changed those rules whenever it was convenient for him. That’s what being with Damian was like. His early childhood with his grandfather, Ras Al-Ghul, and his mother, Talia, primed him to be the next in line for the League of Assassins. This only inflated Damian’s ego, making him innately believe that he was truly better, stronger, faster, and smarter than everyone else. His father eventually was able to deflate his arrogance slightly, but being the child of billionaire and greatest detective alive Bruce Wayne further confirmed Damian’s belief that he was someone special. He was still better, stronger, faster, and smarter than most other people. He was meant for greater things. 

All that might be true. Damian is a very special person. He may very well be a more well-rounded human than 99% of the population. Most people in his life catered to his every whim. Most people didn’t care to discipline him or teach him a lesson in kindness. Bruce, Alfred, and other people in the bat-family tried their best to steer him in the right direction. But ultimately, people just excused his behavior because…well, he’s Damian! And Damian is just special, and he doesn’t face the consequences of his actions like most other people do. 

So, if other people couldn’t set him straight, why did you think you could? Why didn’t you let him continue using you as a doormat? Why couldn’t you just take it like everyone else? 

It’s because you loved him and saw his potential. Not his potential as a crime-fighting superhero, or a super genius, or a businessman. You knew it was in him. You knew he had the ability to soften up. You’ve seen it with your own eyes before. The kindness he exhibited towards animals was unlike anything you’ve ever seen. His ability to connect with other life forms that were considered “lesser than” humans was unbelievable. You saw how he cared for his family and friends by showing up when they needed him. You even saw how he secretly waved and smiled at babies and toddlers whenever he thought no one was looking at him. 

But you eventually became emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausted. Resentment began to build up. Every argument had to end with Damian triumphing over you. His word always mattered more than yours. His opinions were more important. He was always right, and you were always wrong. The last time you saw him was the night when things permanently changed. You would never forget his stone-cold expression as you cried for him, begging him to change. Begging him to treat you the way you wanted to be treated. You were pleading with him to show you some mercy from his harsh criticism and unwanted advice. You poured your heart out to him about how you were hurting so bad it felt like you couldn’t even breathe around him. You cried like you never cried before, bawling like a baby, wishing that he would scoop you up in his arms and whisper apologies in your ear. You wished that he would make promises to treat you like the fragile object you were.

What good did your outburst do? It only led to the end of you and Damian as you knew it. The two of you hadn’t spoken since then. You’ve seen glimpses of each other on social media, and caught each other’s glances at a few mutual gatherings. But now is the first time the two of you didn’t have the luxury of hiding behind screens or friends. 

You wanted to walk past him with an air of confidence, as if Damian was any other person. A stranger. Someone you never shared secrets with. Someone you never laughed with. Someone who never had a piece of your heart. Someone who didn’t infiltrate your thoughts almost daily. Seeing Damian in person brought buried memories to the forefront of your brain. Both good memories, and bad ones.

You felt like your feet were glued to the floor. But you had to move. You had to continue walking forward.

He got closer and closer. You gulped audibly. Your eyes began to water. Not because you were sad. Or mad. No, of course not. Your eyes were watery because you couldn’t blink. Or at least that’s what you deluded yourself in thinking in your frozen state.

His eyes were still glued to his phone. He was walking closer and closer. Your feet felt like they weighed tons. Your breathing became so erratic that you thought you would pass out. Your ears were ringing, the world around you was muffled. The only sounds you could hear were that of your own heart beating and his steady footsteps.

You were still frozen just as he nearly brushed your shoulder. He was so close you could see just about every vein and artery on his neck. Your eyes widen exponentially as you see his green eyes travel from his phone to your shoes, to your knees, to your waist, to your collarbone, and finally, to your eyes. You two lock eyes for the briefest moment, but it felt like an eternity to you. He caught you in your flustered state, with your shocked eyes, red face, and mouth gaping open. But Damian doesn’t stop walking for a single millisecond.

Just as you began to register what was happening, the moment quickly ends. He blinks and returns his gaze to his phone. Your jaw drops open. He knew who you were. He recognized you. And he still walked past you without so much as a hello. But that didn’t matter to Damian. You were someone that he didn’t know anymore. 

Anger ravages through your body. Tears threaten to leak down your face. Your hands form fists and you began to shiver as your icy hot fury spreads like an infection to your entire body. You weren’t even sure why you were so hurt. Didn’t you want to ignore him anyways? Why did it matter that he did the same to you?

Just as soon as the anger covers your body, it dissipates and is replaced by overwhelming melancholy. You knew why it hurt you. It hurt because this was once Damian, your Damian. You secretly hoped every single day that Damian would swoop back into your life, with a grand apology and promises of kindness. With every step that he took farther and farther away from you, you realize that your hope was shattered. Because Damian was never really your Damian anyways. It was your own fantasy version of him. No matter how much you wanted him to change, Damian had to make the decision to change for himself. In just a few short seconds, you realize that there was no one to really be angry with but yourself. Damian showed you who he was unapologetically. You chose to blind yourself to indulge in your imagination. You chose to let him treat you like that. You had only yourself to blame for being so naive.

You watch as his form becomes smaller and smaller as he walks away from you. As far as you can tell, he was completely unaffected seeing you. It was almost as if you two never existed. You let out a chuckle as you allow just one tear to escape. You gave yourself just one tear, before you inhale deeply for what felt like the first time in years. You then continue to walk, away from Damian, and away from your past. Who knows? Maybe you two will reunite in the future. Or maybe you two will forever continue walking past each other like you two were always strangers.