#but still it's annoying to go through especially when it's happened for almost every experience in my life

[kitchensinksurrealism]

can you get burnout from doing nothing

[butchstudlovr]

It's a little annoying how in conversations critiquing how arcane treated Vi, no one brings up her butch identity. Like, yes, everything that happened to Vi would still be bad if she wasn't butch, but to me, it's even worse due to the fact that she was made to be a very butch character.

1. They took away everything that made Vi butch.

Her love for her family and her community, her morals. Vi was seen as butch not just because of her clothes but because of how loving and protective she was for those around her. She wanted to be there for her city, and she told Ekko that herself in s1 when he took her to the firelight tree. Yet in season two, they took her family away from her yet again, purposely acted like Ekko and Vi's relationship did not exist, and had her become a class traitor because these writers didn't give a flying fuck about her character or what the identity of 'butch' meant. Hell, we barely see Vi struggle with becoming a cop in the first place.

(a bit of a side tangent)

Plus, why should Vi care that Jinx bombed the council anyway? Because it resulted in the death of Caitlyn’s mom? The very person who, along with many others, were fine with putting someone like her in either the fissures where she could work to death for their profit, or negligent enough that someone can throw her in a dangerous prison with no trial, throw away the key, and not give a damn? Why was this not touched on? (I know why) This should've been conflicting for both Vi AND Caitlyn since they both know that topside is corrupt.

There's no reason for Vi to give up her morals like this, even if she sees Jinx as dangerous. The only reason why Jinx exists is due to the council's negligence and Silco's grooming. Vi, of all people, should've understood the nuances of Jinx's attack due to the constant violence and oppression the council and enforcers enacted on the undercity and herself.

2. Vi has the traumas that many butches and studs have gone through.

The police brutality, the need to protect others and not feeling strong enough to do so at times, the constant pressure of needing to be strong (mostly due to being the eldest daughter). So many of us clung to Vi due to those reasons, including myself. Heck, lesbian history shows how much butch lesbians were brutalized by cops, yet Arcane didn't take these traumas seriously, especially the police brutality that Vi was subjected to.

Not once do we see Vi struggle with her experiences from prison. These people beat her every other day for seven years, just for her to come out of prison with no semblance of ptsd? Then, they had Vi get hit by her cop girlfriend with a gun and never touched on it again. What was the point of having Vi go to prison and purposely mention that she was beaten to an inch of her life MULTIPLE TIMES, just to have her be hit by the very cop that these people want her to have a romantic relationship with? It really does seem like they wanted to use both prison and butchness as some cool aesthetic instead of actually treating it as the delicate topic that it is.

3. Reaffirming people's lack of care towards butches as people

People already don't take our traumas seriously as butches, a lot of the audience didn't take Vi's traumas in s1 seriously BECAUSE she's butch. Yet the writers reinforced the same harmful rhetoric of dehumanizing butches, sexualizing us, and romantizing our pain.

Each time Vi was close to mental breakdown or had a mental breakdown, it was not taken seriously. Vi almost breaks down to Caitlyn and begs her not to change. What happens? Caitlyn kisses her. When Vi is stuck in a prison cell again and starts to break down and punch the walls, what happens? Caitlyn comes in and cue sex scene. (That's supposedly supposed to reclaim trauma btw)

The WHOLE ENTIRE pitfighter montage was a thirst trap. Here is a butch who is having a severe mental breakdown about the things she had just experienced and the only thing we get of it is shots of Vi self harming (alcoholism, pitfighting), shots objectifying her, and her hallucinations.

We don't get any commentary on how this affects Vi. We could assume it's harmful just like her prison trauma was, but we don't see glimpses of it at all afterwards. Vi literally stops drinking after the montage and we don't see how it affects her. People keep preaching about show don't tell, but when it comes to shows and movies in general you need a balance between both showing AND telling. We see this with how they handled Jinx's mental health in s1, even in bits of Caitlyn’s arc in s2, yet we never see an ounce of this treatment towards Vi.

And certain fans don't help either. They'll defend Vi being hit, defend the lack of exploration on her trauma, and defend the very sex scene that ignores literally everything Vi has gone through during the show. Hell, they get angry at the mere thought of Vi receiving an apology. I mean, what else can I expect from a fandom who thinks Vi can't read and expect Caitlyn to teach her, or wanted Vi to be a virgin so Caitlyn can teach her about sex, or expects Vi to be so unhygienic that Caitlyn needs to teach her how to wash her own ass. (Do y'all see a pattern?)

The treatment of Vi in s2 by the writers is butchphobic. The way people defend how Vi was handled is butchphobic. Defending abuse towards Vi, saying that it didn't harm her that much or that she's been through worse, is butchphobic. Saying that she got a happy ending in a city that hates her and her community, with a woman who has harmed her and showed prejudice against her and her people, is butchphobic.

(And yes, Caitlyn’s line about Vi's blood is prejudiced, it is not just about her being related to Jinx. Mentioning that someone's blood is tainted has been evidence of countless prejudiced ideals towards minorities, ESPECIALLY the lower class.)

The way Vi is treated overall by the writers and by certain caitvi stans is butchphobic and misogynistic and I wished this was mentioned more when talking about it.

[your-nanas-house]

The Beginning

◇ Pairing: Tom Riddle X professor!Reader

◇ Warnings: smut, manipulation, forbidden relationship, Tom Riddle, bath, nudity, dub-con, short age gap

◇ Summary: Tom notices that his favourite professor is a bit stressed.

◇ Note: Sorry for the mistakes and the English. Both character are aged up. Part 2 Part 3, Part 4

The room was filled with the chit chat of students who were taking the Defence Against the Dark Arts class, a subject often called simply DADA by everyone.

In the background of the big lesson room, there was soft music that created an almost pleasant atmosphere in contrast to the type of class that was taking place which had quite heavy topics that frightened many and intrigued others.

One of those people who were fascinated by the subject was Tom Riddle himself, clever boy, Slytherin and much more, especially the darling of professors, of every professor, except Albus Dumbledore, so the young professor Y/l/n was no exception.

There was a special bond between the wunderkind student and the professor, almost intimate if someone misinterpreted it but it was nothing like that or at least that was how it was for Y/n, the young witch had only managed to get her job a few years earlier and right from the start, thanks to the passion for her subject shared with Tom, they began to bond.

The Slytherin student who had now come of age and managed to become the head boy as well as a prefect, had approached the teacher to find out more secrets about magic and because he surprisingly found their conversations interesting as well as entertaining.

This was the real reason why he had started a few months after he met her to pretend to meet her by chance while walking around the castle, thus starting a routine between the two of them that happened almost every day if Y/n wasn't busy with her duties as a Hogwarts professor, which happened sometimes and which annoyed Tom for some strange reason.

Y/n was convinced that Tom saw her as a mother figure, someone to follow and learn from, and so did the young adult, but everything changed one evening.

After a busy astronomy lesson Tom wanted to visit his favorite teacher before heading back to his dormitory but when he reached the door of her classroom, hoping to find her still there, voices made him stop in his tracks.

The door was slightly open and he could easily see what was going on inside Miss Y/l/n's classroom.

She was inside, leaned against a table as she listened attentively to what someone was saying to her, Tom couldn't recognise the man so close to the woman with that look that the student had learned was lustful from the experience of his peers.

The whole situation awakened something all too well known inside the Slytherin heir, envy, pure green envy and resentment turned against them, something animalistic flared up inside him, a need to prove himself just as he had done at the orphanage when he was still a child.

Perhaps that was the reason that started the break of the platonic feelings the student had for his teacher.

New thoughts ran through his head as he decided how to move the pawns of his game in such a way as to receive what he wanted and thought he deserved, waiting patiently for the most suitable moment which came one summer night.

It had been a few months since the beginning of her senior year but they were almost at the end, his attitude had not changed in the slightest towards Miss Y/n and so the young woman did not suspect anything when she received a letter from Tom asking her for urgent help and giving her the coordinates of where to meet.

Worried, the young woman rushed to what she discovered was the prefects' bathroom, she was breathing heavily and was ready to solve whatever the problem was.

The young woman however had expected everything but her favorite student to wander calmly around the bathroom as he arranged the water and suds, meeting her eyes with his cold black ones, a faint smile forming on his face when he spoke "professor".

The atmosphere was suspicious in a way, suspicious but relaxing, since the aroma of soap filled the room as Tom tended to his clothes leaving them propped elegantly on a chair so they couldn't get wet "what's going on, Tom? I got your owl and I came as soon as I could" Y/n declared while she looked around, studying the bathroom in order to understand the riddle and discover why Tom Riddle had made her run all the way there.

She didn't even realize what the boy was doing before he was surrounded by the water and the foam caught her attention again.

Tom was standing in the tub, his clothes forgotten on the chair as the water made his pale skin and nearly Greek god muscles stand out; Y/n couldn't help but notice how his student had grown over the summer, making space for a decidedly attractive young man who reminded her very much of a Greek statue while her y/e/c moved around studying the parts of his skin on view, reaching his neck and finally his face.

She only realised she was holding her breath when their eyes met again, the situation they were in became much clearer to her and a blush appeared on her face making her turn quickly to give privacy to the young man who was staring at her amused with an unfamiliar twinkle behind his pitch black eyes.

She could hear him moving in the water, probably moving closer to where she was before speaking again "I've noticed that you are under a lot of stress lately....I thought a bath might help you, professor" the Slytherin revealed with a mischievous smile that relented slightly when she politely declined several times before attempting to leave the room, soon ending up in the water though, Tom's arms wrapped around her as if they were two snakes, his breath was warm against her neck and she could feel him take in her scent before letting his lips graze the delicate skin of that area "I know you want it too" whispered the young man almost in an attempt to seduce her as he sensed the shiver that ran through her body.

"No one will have to know, my mouth will remain closed" he whispered again, licking this time behind her ear before starting to play with her lobe using his teeth "come on...professor".

Miss Y/l/n's eyes flattered closed despite the fact that she tried to fight her lust, but it was immensely difficult with Tom's large, long hands, which traveled slowly all over her body exploring and almost expertly touching the areas that would make her give in.

It was as if there was a study behind it, his hands traveled with the wisdom of someone who had studied but not yet experimented with practice, this however did not silence the voices telling her not to do it.

The struggle in her head continued and the more time passed the harder it was to resist, especially now that the young adult's body was right against her back and she could feel everything from his muscular chest to his abs to his hard cock against her lower back.

His warm breath was against her now cold neck, making her

shiver and sigh deeply memorising how Tom was touching her because it had been quite some time since she had fucked anyone.

Despite the urge boiling inside her, Y/n shifted, slipping from the wizard's strong grip, stopping his next movements by placing her hand on his smooth chest.

Tom's black eyes met her y/e/c's, his large hand with long, skinny fingers wrapped around her wrist, slowly moving it to his lips, his tongue tracing its way to the inside of her hand before stopping to allow their lips to meet in a strangely soft kiss.

Miss Y/n's tits were against Tom's muscular, pale chest, her hands buried in his black hair as the boy's arms were around her waist bringing her even closer to him.

Their lips moved slowly, both of them lost in the shared sensation, exploring one of the tastes after another. It all ended, however, when Y/n regained control, noticing the head of his cock brushing against her entrance almost as if teasing her.

Reason because she forced herself to pull Tom away from her before licking her lips, weighing up her various options, she wasn't going to go all through with one of her students, it wasn't even supposed to end up like this and yet there she was in a bath with the most talented student at Hogwarts trying to seduce her.

Tom moved closer just as her internal debate ended, it only took her hand to stop him and her gaze followed by a teacher's tone to make him obey "get out of the water, sit on the edge of the pool...this is to stay between us, it won't happen again and I don't want to talk about it ever again, do you understand?" she asked after a few seconds the last question before admiring how Tom's body, shifted and emerged from the water to position itself like she had asked.

And there he was, Tom Marvolo Riddle, in all his glory and nakedness, his legs spread for her and an intense gaze focused solely on her. The young professor had listened to several conversations of the horny schoolgirls going after Tom but had not at all expected what she had in front of her now.

That didn't frighten her though, they had already reached a moment of no return and her hands instinctively moved to the young man's muscular, hairy thighs; they traveled a slow, teasing pace that made all the remaining blood go right down into his now rock hard cock.

The wizard admired closely as Y/n's hands moved over his length, pumping him a couple of times using the water as lubricant before she moved her face closer and left little licks on the tip.

Their eyes met and her mouth continued to work on him, exactly as her hands did, causing small moans followed by hisses that came out of Tom's perfect lips.

His dark eyes had not yet moved away from her just as Y/e/c's were still focused on him, it was intense.

Her tongue came out of her mouth to lick the entire length a couple of times and then take him completely in her mouth, deep throating him without him expecting it.

Her cheeks hollowed as she sucked, Tom's thighs shaked slightly under her hands as sinful grunts escaped his lips; his hips began to move without even meaning to, his tingling hand lusting for dominance gripped her wet hair in a tight grip so that he could choose his movements.

His hips moved swiftly as he fucked her mouth mercilessly focused on achieving his first peak of pleasure, it was a almost suffocation feeling, Tom needed more, much more, but he had almost reached his peak.

The wizard only released his hold when he came, now leaving Y/n free to move as she wanted, despite this the young witch focused her attention till the end on his tip, sucking gently as her hands massaged his balls almost as if she was milking him.

As soon as she realized she had taken every last drop, Y/n slowly pulled away, swallowing it all while looking into Tom's eyes.

The young professor had to avoid him in order to reach the entrance to the prefects' door without falling for another attempt at seduction by the student.

The two looked at each other in silence, Tom wanted to say something but Y/n silenced him with one last kiss, followed by an elegant movement of her wand and three words "this stays here".

As soon as she finished speaking she walked out of the bathroom leaving Tom standing there all alone, looking at the door, his body now dry and his uniform back, it was as if nothing had happened, as if everything had only been in his head but the lipstick marks proved something else.

In fact they only confirmed the wonderful and unexpected sensations he had felt in those few minutes he had been with her, he knew that she had sensed that it was the first time he had done this kind of activity but he also knew that she wanted more, he wanted more, there was something more and Tom was going to take it at all costs.

Things had not begun and ended that night in the prefects' bathroom at Hogwarts, the wizard would make sure of that and he would not put an end to what he had managed to get…what he had been craving for some time and now knew he could have.

Taglist:

@gabile18 , @mrsfullbuster500 , @rex-ray , @elizamalfoyy, @eovjjj , @monkeyking-and-liuer-mate , @jeremiah-va1eska , @gothamchic16, @rabbiteggz , @dieg0brandos-wife , @rottenecstasy , @lazyexcuse , @teh-vampire-bunny , @lobotomy-lover , @slasher-smasher , @sleepycreativewriter , @huntress-valkyrie , @lostmyremembrall, @pastelpiisces

[merrybloomwrites]

It's Just a Game, But Really

Summary: When your brother starts dating Taylor Swift, you figure your wild dreams of dating Harry Styles are now definitely crushed. But some meddling from Jason, Travis, and Taylor may make some dreams come true after all.

Word Count: 3K

AN: This idea randomly popped into my head months ago and I couldn't get it out until I fully wrote it. I feel like this falls into the category of "Crack treated seriously" lol

Also, I understand this is niche, but as an Eagles fan (pls don't come for me) I've watched the entire Travis/Taylor relationship unfold and just thought this would be silly. Writing Jason and Travis was pretty fun too since I've been listening to their podcast for years and it was a cool challenge to write in their voices

Finally, I took creative liberty here and while I normally try to keep details as close to reality as possible, I've changed some things. So the Packers vs Eagles game that happened in Brazil now takes place in philly, and the Chiefs game on Christmas is now against Baltimore so it would be plausible to have the dinner scene in PA. None of this actually matters, this is fiction lol

Title from "So High School" by Taylor Swift

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Growing up with two athletic brothers had been quite an experience. Hundreds of hours were spent at sporting events, often bundled up to watch them play ice hockey or attend the late season football games. In your family, it was important that everyone supported each other.

It went the other way as well. Your brothers attended every spring concert, theater performance, and dance recital you were in. They were your biggest fans, always cheering you on and bringing flowers to give you.

They also took time to learn about your interests. Instead of getting annoyed when Taylor Swift’s music would play through the house, they started listening.

Especially Travis.

He liked the music, and thought she seemed pretty cool. He didn’t admit it, but you guessed that maybe he had a bit of a celebrity crush on her.

Life continued to change as your brothers left for college, then moved to different cities when they got signed to two different NFL teams. You missed them, but it was great seeing them succeed.

Jason and Travis still made time for family, even when Jason got married and started a family of his own. You and Kylie became friends right away, and you immediately loved having another girl in the family. You couldn’t wait for it to be Travis’s turn to find someone. But preferably not through his dating show.

When Taylor Swift announced her Eras Tour, you desperately wanted to go. So you were highly disappointed when you weren’t able to get tickets.

And then Travis surprised you with tickets to her show in Kansas City. By this point you had moved in with Jason and Kylie near Philly, but Travis assured you that he’d take care of all the travel logistics to get you to the concert.

You flew in the night before, getting to spend the day with your brother before heading to the stadium. It was weird to be there for a concert, having attended numerous games there before. It was cool to see how it was transformed into something almost unrecognizable.

Being there with Travis meant getting to be seated with a great view in a cordoned off section. It also meant Chiefs fans coming close to the barrier to talk to him before the show. Watching your brother trade friendship bracelets with these people was a strange moment, one you never would have imagined happening.

Through all that, there was one bracelet he had that you noticed he wouldn’t trade. Taking a closer glance you see what’s written on it and give him a confused look.

“Travis, what in the world is this?” you ask.

“Friendship bracelet,” he answers simply, dodging your true question.

“Obviously. But why is your number on here? Who is this for?”

He laughs nervously but before you can press it further another fan comes up to say hi. You can’t help but wonder what his plan is for that bracelet, even though you have a pretty good idea who its intended recipient is.

The concert begins and you have a wonderful time, dancing and singing along, Travis just as excited beside you. As it ends, Travis speaks with one of the staff members, looking slightly disappointed but not too bothered. Once again you’re left wondering what that was all about.

It’s a couple weeks later and you’re listening to the latest episode of Travis and Jason’s podcast when they bring up Travis attending the concert. Sure enough, he confirms he was trying to get that bracelet with his number to Taylor, and you have to commend him on his creativity and optimism.

What you don’t expect is for Taylor to find out about that and get in touch with Travis. Now a year later, your brother is in a happy, committed relationship with Taylor Swift. She’s come to family dinners, you’ve been next to her during Chiefs games, and she’s made it so you could come to a number of concerts on her tour. You cannot believe that this has become your life. And you have to give your brother credit for his powers of manifestation.

One afternoon you’re hanging in the living room while Jason records the podcast in the basement. He calls out for you and you go down to see what’s going on.

He hands you a set of headphones so you can hear Travis as well, and fills you in on the topic.

“So,” Jason begins. “Fans are starting to give you credit for Travis and Taylor getting together. Do you think that’s fair to say?”

You laugh for a moment that this is why you’re called to speak on what should be a sports podcast, before answering, “I think that’s fair. I mean, he did the work but I would say my childhood Swiftie obsession planted the seed.”

Travis replies, “You don’t think I would have found out about her on my own?”

“Oh you totally would have. But I got the ball rolling ages ago. Timing is everything, what if you’d been too late?”

“Alright, I’ll give you that. We can say you had a hand in this.”

“So that means you owe me,” you say.

Jason chimes in, “Yea Trav, your turn to manifest for Y/N.”

“You want me to manifest a boyfriend for our little sister?” Travis questions.

“Oh, right, wait, don’t actually do that. I forgot, Y/N’s not allowed to date until she’s forty,” Jason says, leading you to roll your eyes at his overprotectiveness.

“Ok, but if I were to try, who would it be? Y/N, who’s your celebrity crush?” Travis asks.

There’s no way you’re answering that on camera, especially with who the answer actually is. You clench your teeth and lift your eyebrows before cheekily saying, “Oh, no, I cannot answer that on the pod. That’s uhm. That’d be messy.” You then shrug and laugh, trying to play all of this off as a bit.

While Travis tries to dig and get you to answer, it clicks for Jason and he says, “Wait, I think I know who it is. Is it, uhm-”

“Don’t you dare say anything!” you exclaim to shut him up.

“Alright, alright. I won’t spill your secrets.”

“Well at least tell it to me later,” Travis says, to which you reply, “Absolutely not. I’m afraid you may actually try to meddle.”

“Who, me? No way,” he replies only to be met with an unimpressed look from you.

The boys drop the subject and you head back upstairs as they finally talk about football again.

You assume that they’ve moved on, and you’re happy when they don’t bring up your celebrity crush again.

You’re even happier when Jason tells you he’s taking you to the season opener Eagles vs Packers game in Philly. You’re super excited to be able to experience an Eagles game alongside your brother. You’re also glad you can be there for him in case it’s hard for him to watch them play without him for the first time since his retirement.

What you’re unaware of is the plan that Jason and Travis had made behind your back.

“So now you’re on board with trying to set up our little sister?” Jason had questioned during a phone call a couple weeks prior.

“Yes. And I have a way of making it happen,” Travis had answered.

“And you want me to help Y/N meet and potentially date a popstar who happens to be your girlfriend's ex-boyfriend?”

“Yes.”

“And he’s a Packers fan?”

“Yea, that is the unfortunate part. And you’re not really helping them date. That’s all on them. But you could at least help her meet him at the game.”

“This is ridiculous,” Jason says. “But I’ll do it.”

And that’s how you find yourself walking through the tunnels of the Linc with Jason before the start of the game and bumping into Harry Styles.

“Hello, I’m Harry,” he says cheerfully, holding a hand out for you to shake.

Mustering up all of your chill, you smile in return while reaching out to clasp his hand and say, “I’m Y/N. It’s so nice to meet you, I’m a big fan.”

“Well, thank you for your support,” he says.

“You kids want a picture?” There are few times you want to kill your brother, but him butting in while you’re talking to Harry Styles is definitely one of them.

“That’s alright,” you say, trying not to impose on Harry too much. So you’re surprised when Harry says, “Of course, let’s get a photo!”

You stand next to him, and his arm wraps around your shoulder and you hope your expression doesn’t show how crazy fast your heart is beating while Jason takes the picture.

“It was so nice meeting you both, I’ll see you around!” Harry says as he walks away.

Before Jason can begin to tease you, you say, “Don’t even say a word.”

He listens to you and instead just laughs as you keep walking.

After some quick hellos to the stadium staff, you’re led up to a box.

“I thought we just had seats today?” You question.

“We did. But when I was talking to Mark he said we got upgraded.”

When you step into the box you’re once again surprised by the presence of Harry Styles.

“Okay, we are definitely in the wrong place,” you murmur to your brother.

“Oh good, you guys found us!” Harry says. You look to see who he’s talking to and get shocked to see it’s you and Jason. “There were some open spots so I asked if you two could join us,” he explains.

“Wow, thank you!” You manage to squeak out.

Suddenly you’re realizing what is about to happen. A four minute encounter in the hallway? Easy. An entire three hour football game? There’s no way you make it through without embarrassing yourself.

And yet, halftime comes and you’ve so far managed not to make a fool of yourself. In fact, you’re even impressed by your witty banter as the Eagles and Packers go back and forth taking the lead.

“So, I read about these botanical gardens nearby,” Harry says.

“Longwood?” You ask.

“Yea, have you ever been?”

“A couple times. I went with Jason, Kylie, and the kids earlier this summer. They’re really nice. If you’re thinking about going, I highly recommend.”

“I actually got a couple tickets for the fountain show tomorrow night. I was wondering if you’d like to go with me.”

Quickly processing that Harry is asking you to hang out with him, possibly go on a date with him, you reply, “I’d love to!”

“Fantastic! I can pick you up in the afternoon?”

“Sounds good to me, thank you.”

You exchange phone numbers and give Harry your address, still in disbelief that all of this is actually happening.

The game resumes, and as the Eagles make their comeback you can’t help but cheer and get wrapped up in the game. And even as Harry’s team starts losing, he still stays happy and continues to joke around with you.

When the game ends and the Eagles fans celebrate, you say to Harry, “I hope this doesn’t affect us hanging out tomorrow.”

“Not a chance, in fact I think that will cheer me up,” he says with a smile.

“Hey Y/N, I’ve gotta go talk to a couple people. You hanging here or coming with me?” Of course, there’s your brother interrupting again. And while you’d rather stay with Harry, you don't really want to be separated from Jason in the post-game chaos. So you say goodbye to Harry with the promise to see him the next day.

On your way back home you put up with the teasing from your brother.

You beg him to be on his best behavior when Harry picks you up the next day.

You know he won’t.

So it’s no surprise that he gives Harry “the talk”, telling him that if he hurts you at all then he’ll have to face two NFL players.

You’re hanging in the living room with Kylie and the kids while this happens, and when the two boys come back Kylie asks,”He wasn’t too scary, was he?”

“No,” Harry replies. “Just scary enough I’d say. Shall we get going?” He addresses this last question to you and you agree, more than happy to get out of the house before Jason takes his big brother role too seriously.

When Harry drives away he lets out a deep breath and you say, “You good?”

“Yea, just- Your brother is scary.”

You start to laugh at the fact that Jason managed to actually shake up Harry Styles. But you decide to help him out by saying, “He seems scary, but it’s mostly all talk. Unless you do something to hurt me. Then you should be scared.”

“Oh I feel so much better,” he says, laughing along now.

The two of you have a wonderful time together at the gardens, especially since Harry manages to somehow fly under the radar. The fountain show is fascinating, and you stand together, Harry’s arm around your waist sending butterflies through your belly.

It’s late when you get home, and he walks you to the door like a gentleman.

When he asks if he can kiss you, of course you say yes. He leans in for a soft kiss before saying goodnight, not leaving until you’ve made it safely inside.

Jason is waiting up for you, and as you tell him about your night you watch his gruff exterior fade away. He looks truly pleased by all you have to report and you’re glad that he seems to approve of Harry.

For the next couple of months, it all goes well. Your relationship with Harry flourishes. You get to see him more than expected since he starts working out of a studio in NYC, only two hours away from where you are.

There is one mild bump in the road, occurring on a Friday evening when Jason and Kylie are supposed to be out at a party with the girls.

You’d been planning on a quiet night home alone. But then Harry had surprised you by showing up at your front door, a bouquet of flowers in hand.

One thing led to another, and before you know it you’re both on the couch. You’re straddling his lap, his hands sliding under your shirt as the two of you make out.

As much as Harry had surprised you, Jason surprises you even more by suddenly coming home and walking right into the living room.

Harry notices him first, and in an effort to save this interaction he pushes you off of him, luckily managing to shift you to the open spot next to him on the couch.

There’s a moment of oppressively awkward silence as Jason stares at the two of you, speechless. Without saying a word he walks to the mud room and grabs the diaper bag that had clearly been left behind earlier.

As he passes through the room to leave he says, “You are adults. Just- don’t be stupid. There are enough kids in this house already.”

Without waiting for a reply he leaves the house. After another moment you and Harry break into nervous laughter.

The mood is pretty much ruined but you still have a nice night watching a movie together. Harry stays with you but has to leave at lunchtime the next day.

That afternoon Jason knocks on your bedroom door, asking if he can talk for a minute.

“Sure, what’s up?” You say, not expecting the conversation that follows.

“I just wanted to ask how things are going between you and Harry,” he says.

“Oh! Good! Yea, things are going well. I really like him,” you answer.

“And you’re being safe?”

“Oh my god, Jason! We are not having this conversation,” you say as your cheeks warm at the implication.

“Well you’re living in my house, I just, you know. I feel responsible for your well being.”

“I’m safe. Very safe. You don’t have to worry.” You hope your words will convince him to drop the topic.

“And you trust him? Cause I mean, he’s a big time Popstar. Bet he’s broken a fair number of hearts before.”

You find yourself needing to defend Harry and ask, “Have you had this conversation with Travis about Taylor?”

“Fair point,” he concedes. “I just don’t want you getting hurt. You’re sure about him?”

“I am.”

“Okay then. That’s what matters. I’m only looking out for you.”

“I know. But Harry and I are happy. I promise.”

With that smoothed over, the next few weeks continue drama free.

And then comes Christmas.

Due to scheduling, Harry had yet to meet Travis. You’ve talked to your brother about him, and you know Travis has talked about all of this with Taylor. So while you’ve been told that it’s no big deal that your boyfriend and your brother’s girlfriend are exes, you’re still a bit nervous for Christmas dinner.

It’s a late meal, since you have to wait for Travis to get there after the Chiefs vs Ravens game, and you spend the afternoon entertaining your nieces and helping prepare the food.

Finally Travis and Taylor arrive, and for a moment you can’t help but feel self conscious. The room is full of NFL players and international pop stars. You excuse yourself to the kitchen for a moment to collect yourself. When you walk back to the living room, Harry greets you with the biggest smile, and those feelings of self doubt melt away. Because those big accomplishments and accolades aren’t what matter to him. What he cares about is how kind you are, how fun and loving you are. He wraps an arm around your shoulders, pressing a kiss to your head and you blush knowing your whole family is watching.

But looking up at them you see nothing but support. Your mom is practically glowing seeing all her children with their significant others, and quickly organizes a family picture.

It takes some time to get all three of the little girls to cooperate, and by the time the photo is taken, dinner is ready.

There is something surreal at seeing Harry and Taylor pass the potatoes or bread basket, never having imagined this is how your life would turn out.

But that night, as you all agree to break the internet by posting the family picture, you know you wouldn’t want it any other way.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: I wrote the first half of this as the Eagles lost to the Commanders, thus breaking a 10 game win streak soooo that was a bummer.

I wrote the ending after watching the Eagles beat the Cowboys, so at least that turned back around!

I think this may be the silliest thing I’ve ever written.

[lover-of-mine]

it’s so interesting that with previous love interests, it was normal and fine to not ship them and to still want buddie in the future, but now, we have to sit down and shut up and accept that it’s never happening and B/T are forever

oh no wait, it’s not interesting, it’s annoying and confusing and frankly just weird. misogynistic and borderline fetishistic

shipping non-canon couples, especially ones with 6 years of history and love and shared experiences, is the norm in literally every fandom, but now suddenly it’s wrong and how dare we

a fair few of the people saying this are also, conveniently, the ones implying that B’s bisexuality is tied to T and T alone and if we don’t ship them, we don’t support bi!B

how. very. interesting! /annoying/confusing/weird

So interesting. Dude, I got called homophobic because I didn't immediately look at them in 703 and decided they were true love. In 703. Because I didn't look at the shoulder touch and immediately started shipping them. Homophobic with all the letters. I got yelled at. After 703. Legit almost deleted this whole blog over some of the things that got sent. I was legitimately crying with friends who are not in the fandom if I was being unreasonable or insane or whatever else I got called for not jumping in instantly and to ask if I was actually doing something wrong. People were saying we were being weird about queer storylines. That we needed to shut the fuck up and enjoy the way Oliver Stark was gonna make out with a hot guy. That not being on board the ship meant that we had an unreasonable and ridiculous necessity of making sure Eddie was the only guy for Buck. Literally every single person in this fandom hc Buck 1.0 also hooked up with guys. Most people never acted as if Buck needs to be guided through his queerness by this hot older guy. Oh, wait, no, they did. With T. People automatically decided that Buck needed a queer Yoda. That he needed someone to hold his hand and be a guide. They added a fucked up power dynamic from the get go. With no information, Buck was already a baby that needed his hand held through his own sexuality. And let me tell you one thing, I know for a FACT that if it was Eddie, the automatic reaction wouldn't be putting T in this idealized experienced gay guide position when that would've made more sense (not that I think any of them needs a guide) because Eddie is the one with the body count you can count with one hand and a weird relationship with sex. But somehow I'm the one who's weird about Buck's sexuality. I don't want Buck to explore. I need Buck to only have loved Eddie. Sure. Look, I don't wanna multiship. The same way everyone is allowed to ship whatever the fuck they want, I'm allowed to not ship whatever the fuck I want. If it was a woman no one would've been in my inbox basically demanding I make the same level of analysis I make for buddie for them (let me tell you one thing too, if I made the level of analysis I do with buddie with bt, no one would like what I have to say ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯) but I'm still getting asked for it for some reason when I never indicated I ship the two.

But I'm not allowed to have any critical thoughts about anything involving bt or else I'm being weird and that's the mild term that's being used. I can't point out the fact that T left Buck in a curb and failed to communicate shit properly even though it happened in canon. I can't say that I think it felt kinda callous for him to say "they had henleys in the 80s" to Buck being upset T didn't dress on theme (also, the job requires them to change into a uniform by nature, he could've put a colorful shirt and indulged Buck a little bit there without it interfering with the way he was on standby but I can't say that or else I'm a hater). There is no criticism allowed in the ship but somehow I'm the one being weird. I don't think Buck should be in a relationship. I think Buck is still exhibiting the same patterns when it comes to love interests. And yes, I would feel the same way if it was Eddie. Buck doesn't know how to be happy alone and he will never be happy in a relationship until he learns that. I was saying that when it was Natalia and getting praised for my understanding of Buck's character. Now I'm locking Buck onto Eddie. Buck's bisexuality is only valid if he's actively kissing a guy for some people but I'm the one being weird. BT have so many visual parallels to bucktaylor, but if I say that's a bad sign I'm being a hater. I need to sit my ass down, ignore six seasons of buildup, accept that it's over, and that now making Eddie queer and getting buddie together would suck because it would destroy the friendship they built so bt are endgame and gonna get married and somehow I'm the one who's being weird about queer relationships and attaching Buck bisexuality to a person. The fandom lost its fucking mind when they saw Oliver kiss a guy and, yeah, it does feel misogynistic and borderline fetishizing. But somehow I'm the one getting blocked by half the fandom when I'm not even pointing everything I want out. I lose at least one mutual every time I even suggest maybe we should look at things a bit more critically. I have to sit here and justify things to an insane degree while people's reaction to any of the criticism is "uH BuT T Is hOt aNd hE Is a gUy sO It iS DiFfErEnT oKaY?" Critical thinking skills went out the window because now there's a guy involved and that's fucking weird. People are straight up erasing Eddie, the actual main character of the show, Buck's established partner of years, Buck's best friend, the only person in canon who never left Buck in any capacity, because some guy kissed Buck and, he, uh *check notes* treats Buck as an actual human being? so that means he's perfect. It's nuts. The bar is hell.

Yes, I know this is not everyone in the fandom and I know this is not everyone who ships them but if what I'm saying feels like a personal attack to you maybe you should do some thinking. Anyone can ship anything, you want to ship them go off, power to you, the weird part here is the way some people are demanding other people ship it too. We could all be coexisting if people didn't get weirdly comfortable demanding shit from other people in the fandom and deciding their opinion is the only one that matters so they need to call out anyone who thinks differently, but alas, that's too much to ask.

[foursaints]

regarding your post about people feeling uncomfortable with reading certain topics i think its quite the opposite of them not realizing its not a material reality. it actually feels too close to home, a bit too real (considering we hear and read about cases every day) and you are aware that it happen to you everyday so it makes you feel uncomfortable to think about. on the other hand topics like murder, war crimes, etc. most people are alienated from them feeling safe that it wont happen to them (now thats a thing that happens only in stories) and reading about doesn't spark the same type of panic.

but also even if that wasn't the case.. what do you think its supposed to happen when somone is uncomfortable? just keep reading, shoving discomfort down their throat because of other people? Yes i understand that there are victims who have survived it and i will try my best to accommodate them and treat them in the way they want to and i will even swallow my discomfort down and read about the experience but that wont change anything. i will still be afraid of the possibility that will happen to me, i will still squirm when i hear about another case and then try to avoid in the places where i go to enjoy myself (like ao3)

also in terms of victims i imagine that as much as there are some who would like to read and write about their experience there are other who would want to distance themselves from the memory. Isn't it just preference at the end of day. why do people must be guilt tripped to to read something they dont want to.

😭 this is of the most braindead annoying messages i’ve ever received on here i’m actually almost impressed. fucking obviously i am not suggesting that CSA victims read triggering material on purpose that would be insane (💀). but my post wasn’t about victims! i was in fact complaining about emptyhead non-survivors who say things precisely like this!

1. describing murder and war crimes as literally “now that’s something that only happens in stories!” is such a glaring indictment of your worldview… these things are realities for everyone living outside of the imperial core. even within the west, if you’re a transwoman of color, if you’re a DV victim, an addict, an unhoused person, or poc and interacting with police– you are not alienated from extreme violence! it’s very real & present experience! for you to say that reading about systematized violence is “safer” because it’s “less real” especially when we are in the middle of a genocide is literally stomach churning 😭. you should go donate to winter relief for gaza and never speak up again

2. not everything is about you! perhaps this is harsh but i do believe that if you haven’t experienced csa/sa (or been close to the issue), then reading about it cannot be “triggering” to you in the same way it would be for, say, someone with actual csa ptsd. you might feel uncomfortable, but you are not in danger of having a trauma response. sensitivity is beautiful, but i think in moments like these you could stand to be a little bit braver, and a little bit more sturdy. nothing fictional can hurt you. feeling discomfort and fear at the contents of a story is not the same as real pain- it is healthy to practice experiencing these emotions through the safe medium of fiction.

so much of this ask is painfully egotistic… but in a naive, almost endearing sort of way? you dismiss others experiences with the wave of a hand: “yes victims but what about my SQUIRMING”, “but what about the mere possibility it might happen to ME”! i want to remind you that i am a csa survivor complaining about the difficulty of discussing these subjects with non-survivors, and you are a non-survivor inserting yourself into this space to ask “what about MY discomfort?”…. well! terrible, violent, undoingly horrific events happen every day! it is not helpful to act like victims of SA are somehow uniquely traumatized in some special, singularly awful way. no “type” of trauma is inherently worse than any another. people survive and recover from all kinds of experiences, and i find this beautiful & empowering, and frequently the subject of great art. it is worth confronting your own personal discomfort (💀) with that art in order to sit with and face the lived reality of those experiences. doing so will help you develop a more complex and empathetic worldview.

not everything is about you! 🙂‍↕️ the imagined possibility of your own pain should not be worth more to you than the lived reality of someone else’s. this ask was exhausting let’s all read averno by louise gluck to calm down

[chaosduckies]

Silence In The City (2)

Don’t really know how to feel about this one but oh well the brainrot wanted it. This one is a little heartwarming though! (To me). So uhhh just enjoy another part of the kaiju stories :D

CW: Anxiety

Word Count: 4.4k

2- Devon

When I woke up this morning there were several people effortlessly getting me to my feet. I groaned, unaware of what was happening. Several people were talking as they shoved my forward but my legs didn’t want to move. They kept yelling commands at me as I groggily rubbed my eyes open. “Wha-” I barely choked the words out before being thrown onto an oddly familiar, hard metal floor. My arms were a little shaky trying to keep my body up. My vision was a little blurry, but as I looked around I could tell I was in an extremely dim room. I took deep breaths to calm down. To stop myself from overthinking. Where was I? I thought I was going home today. What was going on? Were they going to kill me? I bit the bottom of my lip, forcing my head up to take in my surroundings. There were huge metal walls, a mirror high above, something black moving… Wait…

My eyes widened once the black, scaly and spiky looking wall in front of me moved along the metal floor. I sucked in a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. This place made everything worse. My eyes felt red and puffy after crying myself to sleep last night, and not to mention how I spend almost every waking moment here anxious and scared. After the experience with Kieran I thought I would be able to go home… apparently not. After all, I was in the same room as him right now. I think. My hands turned into fist as what seemed like their tail lifted up, revealing tired eyes. I jumped, staring. It was Kieran all right. The same purple eyes as yesterday. 

Kieran rolled his eyes, huffing through his nose and moving his tail over me. I placed my hands over my head, a little scared that he was going to crush me. I also had just woken up so my mind was everywhere but thinking about the way he treated me yesterday. Nice and some-what calmly and not the monster that they said he was. After a few seconds, when I realized that I wasn’t dead, I turned my head to see that their tail was surrounding me. Why? He didn’t really seem like he even wanted to be around anyone. Heck, I didn’t even know what time it was. Just early in the morning. 

He stole a glance over at me, holding a silent staring contest. I sucked in a deep breath, rubbing my eyes and yawning. He blinked, doing the same but covering up his mouth. I stared down at the ground. I think I had an idea of why they would cover up their mouth but I wasn’t going to say anything. Even though I was still half asleep I’m sure I would pass out. I’m surprised I haven’t yet. Kieran glared at the mirror, making himself smaller and struggling with how small the room was for him. The horns on his head hitting the roof every now and then. He grumbled everytime, just burying his head into his knees. Was it really that hard just to raise the ceiling a little? It seemed annoying to him. How does he even stand up? I feel like it would cramp up my legs if I was forced to sit down all day. I doubt he could even stretch them out.

I started to lay down before there was a red light blaring above. Kieran turned to me, “You need to get up.” He whispered. His voice still hurt my ears but not nearly as much before. I forced myself back up, even standing on my feet. I was scared of not doing what he tells me to. Especially after thinking of how many times I could’ve died yesterday. Too many. Would today be like yesterday? Why was I here? I yawned again, rubbing my eyes. 

Kieran studied me for a while before looking up at the ceiling, ignoring the flashing red lights. Eventually they went away but I had no idea what they were for. Was something about to happen? It was already hard enough to keep myself from having another anxiety attack. I didn’t have my pills either. I took a few seconds to just focus on something and clear my mind. That usually helps. I hadn’t realized Kieran looking at me confused before I turned back around, a little more calm. I played with my hands before one of the walls started opening, revealing an outside space that was still surrounded by walls that seemed to go on for forever. The sun shone brightly above, even though it was still morning. The place it shone on relished in the light with the many trees and overgrown weeds and bushes. It actually looked kind of beautiful in a way. I guess that answers my question of how he hasn’t just given up on life yet. Though this place kind of looks familiar. I knew this base I was in was by the ocean of course, but where? I shook my head, watching as Kieran crawled onto his hands and knees still somehow managing to bang the back of his head hard against the roof. He winced, groaning out frustration. If I were being honest it was a terrifying sight, chills ran down my spine, but there was no way he’d hurt me, right? 

“Let him die and you’ll regret it.” There was a voice over a speaker that made the spikes on Kierans back flare up. Like he felt threatened. He was right to think that, even her voice made me terrified. Though that wasn’t hard to do. Kieran rolled his eyes, but I could tell that he was fine with letting me come along. He nudged his head outside, as if telling me to follow. I jumped, jogging and slowing down when I ran past one of his hands. This was going to be a lot of work for me. It was too early in the morning to be out exercising. I winced when I rolled my ankle, nearly tripping. I really was a sad excuse for a human. I caught myself, letting out a sigh of relief when I didn’t fall. Kieran tilted his head when I stopped, apparently not seeing how I almost tripped. To be honest I couldn’t be more grateful that he didn’t see. He seemed like the teasing type. Even if he was more alone and annoyed than anything. 

I paused when Kieran started moving, lowering his head and squinting his eyes down at me. He let out a huff from his nose, “This is the last time I’m helping you.” I jumped, shutting my eyes closed and hearing some shuffling before everything seemed to stop. When I looked back, I saw his hand laid flat onto the ground, still huge and looked hard to even climb on to. I looked back up at him, his eyes reading ‘hurry up’. I hesitantly ran over to his hand, struggling to climb on. It was hard and it made me feel uneasy at just how huge he was compared to me. He seemed to grow impatient this way too, but I forced myself up, the muscles in my arms tired. As soon as I was on I rolled onto my back, sighing and looking up, only seeing the ceiling far above me. 

This all felt so strange. This wasn’t my first time in his hand and yet, it felt so different. Instead of trying to keep me in a fist he just kept his palm up, fingers a little curled as if creating a border. My heart was racing. What was I thinking? The one time I’m not thinking and this is what happens. I’m completely at his mercy. He could drop me and not even know. Forget that I’m there. I heard my own heartbeat beat through my ears, my vision growing a little stretched out. I sighed, sitting up and taking long and deep slow breaths. They didn’t give me the chance to grab my pills… or even take them beforehand. I’d have to go through the day without any help.

Kieran tilted his head in confusion, not giving a warning before bringing his hand up, giving a small glance to make sure I was okay before crawling through the door. It was weird. I was high up, but I know he wasn’t standing up. Was it for me? There was no way. He seemed a little annoyed already that he had to help me again after saying he wouldn’t do so anymore yesterday. I still have no idea what that meant.

It would be crazy to say that I wasn’t terrified. Who wouldn’t be in this situation? Going to an unknown abandoned part of a city, only having a half-human half-kaiju looking out for you that had very hard emotions to read. Seriously, I couldn’t tell if he was happy that I was forced to be in here or just annoyed. My fate had seemed to be between his palm or a deadly fall. Not sure which I trusted more. Even though Kieran seemed to prove that he really wasn’t harmful at all. At least to me. 

Kieran brought us both to an empty space that looked like he stayed here often with how everything was moved around for his convenience. We both turned to each other, as if he was trying to figure out what to do with me. My anxiousness couldn’t take it as I gripped the hem of my shirt and fidgeted with my shaky hands. What was he going to be doing with me? I hated how he waited so long before lowering his hand to the ground, slightly tilting it so it was easier to slide down. I stumbled off with a yelp before eating a mouthful of thankfully soft grass that broke my fall. I groaned slightly, hearing Kieran very softly laugh above me before apologizing, “Sorry.” It was unsettling that he could see me. Not even mention hear me. Like I wouldn’t be able to escape even if I could. He’d easily found me. Or… maybe that’s how he noticed me in danger? Besides seeing the Kaiju that was running through the streets, how would he have known I was trapped and needed help? I guess having good sight and hearing was a good thing. The pros outweigh the cons apparently. 

He moved, the ground shaking slightly as he did and laid down in the clearing he had made for himself, a pair of arms being used as a headrest and the other two tucked away underneath his stomach. The sun was barely going to start rising, meaning it wasn’t even six in the morning yet. I rubbed my eyes, yawning before sitting up, cleaning the dirt off of my clothes. What was the purpose of me even being here? Should I ask Kieran? Would he know? He does word things a little weird. Like he’s not going to help me anymore? When would he have to after this? My parents would probably want to move away from the coast like they always have. I think the only reason we stayed was because I absolutely loved the beach. So was it my fault we were in this mess in the first place? I shook my head, trying to take my mind off of it. I can just ask my parents when I get home, right? 

When I looked back up to Kieran, his eyes were closed, his breathing slow. Should I ask  him now? While he’s not in such an anguished mood? Was it a bad idea? Would he do something if I bothered him? Would he try to scare me off again? A million thoughts raced through my head. It was hard to choose between which one, or the many outcomes. He might not even wake up! Should I raise my voice a little? Could I even manage that? It didn’t seem very likely if I were being honest. 

“...Will I be g-g-going back home?” I nearly choked on my words, unhopeful of an answer. I was too quiet. Kieran had to be asleep- his head lifted up almost immediately. I couldn’t tell if he was shocked or just trying to catch my own reaction. He sighed, letting out a huff of air from his nose, ruffling my hair. “No. Probably not.” I didn’t know if it was just me, but I couldn’t help but catch the sad hint in his voice. The words hit me twice as hard then. I… Wouldn’t be going back home? Why? I thought they said I would be! I heard my heartbeat ring through my ears, my breathing seeming to slow down. I couldn’t cry here! It would be pathetic! Were the scientists watching? 

“L-look,” He stuttered, “I didn’t mean to say it so harshly, but they’re probably not going to let you go back after doing what they asked you to. That’s why I tried to scare you off yesterday but… you’re very hard to be annoyed and mad at.” For once, I could read his emotions clearly. He was sad. Worried. Almost like it was directed for me. My lips quivered. So if I had run from him yesterday I would’ve been gone? Back home? Why did I have to be so stubborn? Why did I always make the wrong decision? I wanted so badly to run but I didn’t. I wiped away the incoming tears. He really wasn’t trying to be mean. He was just trying to save me. To send me back home. So why did he react that way? Why was it so hard to get mad at me? It seemed to be the complete opposite with other people. 

“I-I’m sorry.” Maybe he didn’t want to be around me anyways. Was that an unspoken reason? I shouldn’t have even been outside that day. I should’ve just forced my way into the underground bunkers like my parents had done. Kieran shouldn’t have had to save me in the first place. Then I would’ve been fine and probably still living out my depressing life. 

Another huff of air hit me, “I don’t know why you’re apologizing. It was my fault why you’re stuck here anyways,” He winced, propping his head up with one of his hands, “I should be the one sorry, and I am.” This was probably the most he’s ever talked to me. A little loud for my ears even though he was whispering, but there was nothing I could do about that. I stayed silent for a while. What else was there to do? I was here for Kieran! Heck, I didn’t even know why they brought me here. But another question popped into my mind.

“Why d-did you s-save me then?” I fidgeted with my hands. That kept the both of us quiet for a while. Neither of us knew what to say. Like even Kieran didn’t know why he saved me. I mean I’m extremely grateful that he did but if he knew that this would happen then why do it in the first place? 

“You needed help. I saw you. And, well, I didn’t want you to die. So I just helped you out.” Kieran stared, his full attention on the next words that leave my mouth. What was I supposed to say? It was nice of him to help just because I was in danger but why did he emphasize that he didn’t want me to die? Were they telling him otherwise? I wouldn’t be shocked if that were the case. They didn’t seem to have any regard for anyone. What was one death going to do anyways when you could save millions of other people? I guess a lot of people thought the same way. 

“Th-thank you.” I turned and looked away. I already said thank you, but it was all I could think of to say. Kieran rolled his eyes, though I could see the slight smile on his face,“Now it’s my turn,” His voice was a lot softer as he moved closer to me, though I instinctively moved a little bit away. He didn’t show any reaction to it, but I could tell he was going to say something. 

“Why are you still here if you’re scared?” He pointed a finger out into the city, the sun rising above it finally. I flinched ever so slightly, but of course that caught his attention and made him frown just a tiny bit. 

“U-um, it’s uh-” I didn’t actually have a reason for staying. Because I didn’t want to be alone? Because it was the right thing to do? It was a hard question to answer. I knew it was easy to see that I was afraid, but if I were being honest I’d rather take my chances with Kieran than going off somewhere else. Plus, I was still confused why the scientists said something about me dying. What did it mean? Was there something else in here? I was tempted to ask Kieran but it was their turn for questions, and I couldn’t even answer one. 

“I just feel safer here. Even though you’re huge.” I move my hands out apart to explain my point, trying to calm my racing heart. Did I answer it right? Was that what he wanted to hear? Kieran stared with curious eyes, only to let out a playful huff through his nose, full on laughing. I had to cover my ears to make sure my eardrums wouldn’t bust, but I laughed lightly with him too. I admit it was funny, but to Kieran it might be for a different reason. 

“Ah, sorry that was loud,” He apologized, quieting his voice to a whisper that was still a little loud for me, “You feel safer with someone you’re scared of? You’re just strange. But in a good way I guess.” A good way? What did that mean? Was there even a good version of being strange? In my book there wasn’t if people say you’re weird then you’re weird. That’s just how it worked. But I guess in a way Kieran knew things others didn’t. Obviously things I didn’t either. 

Kieran sighed, seemingly focused on something that wasn’t here. I lowered my hands back from my ears and began playing with them. What should I do? I was terrified of going off on my own, but I also didn’t just want to stay there doing nothing. Then again, did I really have a choice? Ever since I’ve been here I haven’t been able to do what I’ve wanted to. I didn’t have time to grab my pills, I haven’t eaten in over a day, pretty much everything hurt, I’ve had several breakdowns and it hasn’t even been a full day here. I’d say things were going pretty bad. 

“You know you don’t have to stay here. Just watch out for the small kaiju. They have them out.” Kieran explained. My eyes widened, my heart slightly beating faster. I could even hear it ring in my ears. Small kaiju? Like the ones that are as big as a large dog? I don’t even think I could handle those if I were being honest. I’ve never had to fight back against any kind of kaiju. Heck, I’m pretty sure I’d just pass out. It would be pathetic to say that to Kieran though. Even though he probably already thinks that about me. No surprise there really. 

I stayed silent, even moving the slightest bit closer to Kieran despite my heart beating rapidly. He stared for a long while before sighing through his nose, ruffling my hair a bit, “Whatever  you want.” He shrugged his shoulders, turning back towards whatever was going on. It was still early in the morning, and honestly I was tired and hungry but my anxiousness kept me distracted. There were kaiju in here that could kill me. Was that why they had said I could die? I thought they had just meant that Kieran would be the one to kill me, but apparently it was the complete opposite. He was the one protecting me. 

I jumped when I heard something distant, like something falling and crashing. The Kaiju? Were they coming here? My heart rang faster through my ears as I turned around. There was nothing there, but there was no that whatever fell did on its own. “U-um, is that them?” I wasn’t sure he heard me, but he just sighed, “Annoying….” My eyes widened? Was I annoying? Should I stop talking? What was he going to do? Was I in trouble? I mean of course I was in trouble but that didn’t help figure out what he was going to do! I knew I was annoying but did it have to be now to say it? Right when I was already anxious? 

Kieran held his head up with one of his hands, the other moving right in front of me, like he was waiting for something. I looked around, seeing that his arm was covering my last escape route. To go along with that, there was a not so small Kaiju rounding the corner. Okay, maybe small for Kieran but for me? It was twice the size of a bear, looked kind of like a really scaly dog. What really caught me off guard was the extremely sharp fangs. I jumped when it growled and charged towards me, baring its sharp teeth at me. My body was too terrified to move, let alone even scream. Kieran let out a huff through his nose and just simply moved his hand towards it, making them whine exactly like a dog would. I caught the smirk on Kieran’s face looking like he was pleased with himself. 

I hadn’t realized that I was breathing fast until I felt the air in my lungs give out on me. I took a few seconds to calm down once again. This was way too hard without taking my pills for the day. Just the constant worry and stress was too much to handle while out here. Didn’t I tell them about it? So why was I forced to be here? Kieran side-eyed me, probably to make sure I was okay. I probably looked like it since he looked away almost immediately, but I most definitely was not. Was I really annoying to him? Or maybe he was talking about the kaiju? He hadn’t even done anything to that one and they ran off. Does he deal with them everyday? If they knew he didn’t like them near then why even go near him? None of it made sense at all, but I couldn’t be more grateful that I wasn’t the one he threatened and instead the one he saved. Multiple times I might add even after he said that he wouldn’t anymore yesterday. 

“They’re annoying, not you. Don’t worry about it.” He explained. How did he know? Every. Single. Time. It’s like he could read how I felt or something. Like an empath. I couldn’t do that and I was freakishly good at reading people. How does he keep doing this? 

“They stay away from you?” I forced myself to stand up on shaky legs, walking over to his hand that had scared the one from earlier. Somehow it was a lot easier to talk to Kieran now. Like I was growing used to it? Should I? If I’m not going home, is that a good thing? I had no idea.I tried my best to ignore the lingering fear of being this close to Kieran, hiding behind his hand while peeking out to look for more of those kaiju. Kieran had waited a long time to answer. Like he was nervous or something. Though I was patient, taking a few shaky steps back when I heard another one. 

“Um, y-yeah,” He paused, his voice sounding a little nervous while moving his hand so I was hiding behind it again, “But you’re here so they kind of just want you.” His voice went back to being deep and short. Why did he sound nervous at first? I didn’t pay too much attention, too focused on the threat that minded its own business. Kieran sighed, “Kind of boring out here isn’t it?” My eyes widened. Was he actually starting a conversation with me? A mixture of emotions hit me. Excitement, a little bit of fear, but that didn’t stop me from replying like normal, “You mean besides the murderous dogs coming after me? Y-yeah I guess it is.” I tried to sound funny, and obviously it worked because we both started laughing, Kieran making sure to laugh quieter for me. 

It made me feel happy for once that I could make someone laugh besides my parents from time to time. I haven’t really felt this way in a while, and it's strange that I’m sharing it with someone who’s only partly human. Kieran stopped laughing and started to hold himself up, placing both arms underneath him. The silence stretched between us before my stomach growled quietly. I tried to muffle the sound so Kieran wouldn’t hear, but it was pretty much useless. He extended a hand out, “Let me guess, they didn’t feed you?” I nervously backed up, clutching my stomach and nodding my head. What did he think of me now? Just a few seconds we were having a little laugh but of course I had to ruin everything. 

“C’mon. They’ll probably give you something.” He waited for me to get onto his hand, a tired look on his face as always but there was something else that I couldn’t read. Why was he so confusing? Or maybe that wasn’t the right word.. Closed off? Maybe that was it. He didn’t make it easy to read any of his emotions at least. 

I walked over to his hand, trying to climb on but failing miserably as usual. It was just hard since I couldn’t get my leg over, but eventually I got the hang of it. I rolled over onto my back, sitting up and catching my breath. I really was small to him. I couldn’t even get onto his hand without trouble. I sighed hopelessly, clutching my stomach in case it decided to make the most embarrassing noise ever again. I just laughed softly in the end though , “What happened to not helping me again?” 

Kieran’s eyes shot open wide like he had forgotten his own promise. He huffed through his nose and rolled his eyes. For a second I thought he was actually mad at me before he laughed along, “I guess I changed my mind.” 

How could these people have treated him so horribly?  ——————

Again, don’t know how to feel about it and I think I mainly wrote this to satisfy my brainrot (I only want more now so that kind of backfired) But these two are definitely my favorite OC’s! Yes I am a still a little sick, but I’m working on editing all of the writing I did and will probably post them throughout the week!

Taglist: @da3dm @dav8530

If you would like to be added or removed please let me know!

[yanderedbdimagines]

Hi ! I love your work and I saw requests were open !! I was wondering if you could write something about Trickster going sentient, like reader is a DBD player and Trickster is their killer main and he's becoming sentient ! He starts acting yandere, getting mad when they buy another killer, talking to them through the game etc ? Pleaaase !!

----------

Thank you so much for appreciating my work!

And of course! Trickster has always been one of my favorite go-to killers as well. He still kind of is! He may not look terrifying at first glance, but what he’s capable of is what truly makes him scary to me. I tried to capture that feeling in this piece as well. Also, I believe his anger would actually be quite subtle, put potent in a way. He's called the Trickster for a reason after all. :P Especially towards his obsession.

PS: If any character in the game somehow became sentient, I’d throw my computer out immediately. Let alone a killer! I would totally freak out! xD

PSS: I don't know any Korean. If I messed it up by using translators wrong, I'm sorry in advance!

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The Trickster

Ji-Woon Hak had always been your go-to killer. Maybe it was the thrill of playing him. The way he laughed in insanity, coupled with that crazed giggle as he chased survivors down, and the sheer passion and arrogance laced through his Korean voice lines. His presence in the game simply felt different from the others. All the way down to his disturbingly good chase music, which is an excellent representation to his character.

And as such, he’s indeed a star. Effortlessly charming and dangerously captivating. Before the Entity took him, the crowds adored him for a reason, oblivious to the gleam in his golden eyes when the screams began behind closed doors, embedded into his music like secret, bloody confessions. They never recognized the torture hidden in his music, layered beneath the melody like a secret only he was twisted enough to understand.

Killing wasn’t just second nature to Ji-Woon. It was the purest form of his self-expression.

And to you, that was the real horror. Because unlike many others in the Entity’s grasp, he wasn’t a monster made. He was a monster born. Just another handsome face, smiling for the cameras, waving to his adoring fans. His darkest secrets not buried, but hidden in plain sight. Or more so within earshot. And no one ever dared to hear them until it was too late.

Maybe that was why, after months of playing Dead by Daylight, you never really strayed from him. You bought his skins, experimented with his builds, mastered his mechanics and the precise arc of his blades. He was your constant pick.

So at first, the strange things that eventually started to happen didn’t really bother you.

It began in the character selection screen. His model glitched once. A wide smirk suddenly etching itself onto his features. He turned around more often while you waited in lobby, flashing you that saucy wink of his. There was a slight lag when you hovered over another killer, an occasional stutter in his idle animations, a minor bug where his eyes tracked your cursor just a bit too smoothly.

You decided to ignored it.

Then the loading screens started taking longer. Freezing for a second too long when his face suddenly appeared, as if the game itself hesitated. And once, in the middle of a match, you left the desk for a moment to grab something from your drawer, letting the killer stand idle in a house in Springwood.

That was when you heard it, just as you returned. Faint. Threading between the distant caws of crows and the crackle of the Entity’s realm. A voice, which sounded silky and teasing. Familiar.

"Getting distracted, 자기야1?"

Your hand jerked on the mouse. It had to be a bug. A voice line triggering where it shouldn’t. You brushed it off as a trick of the mind.

Then, after a while, the disconnects started. Not often, but just enough to be annoying. Almost every time you played another killer, you’d be booted mid-match. No error message. Just a sudden return to the desktop. Whenever you played survivor, you almost always found yourself facing the Trickster, with a hint of a stutter as you tried to get your character away from him.

But when you played as Ji-Woon himself? Smooth. No lag. No crashes.

Still, you pushed it aside. Games had bugs. Maybe the servers were acting up. You refused to get paranoid over minor issues, or the fact that barely any other killer ever appeared when you played survivor. Perhaps you just had a weird streak of fate.

Then, one night after watching a video, you tabbed back into the game and noticed that his theme music in the killer selection menu was different. Slower and warped. Like it was played underwater. The Trickster was staring at you. Not in his usual cocky way, but with his head tilted slightly, his smile smaller than usual and his golden eyes literally locked onto yours. As if he were waiting for something.

The screen glitched once, then again, and everything returned to normal. But matches grew even more strange after that. Survivors went down faster, their screams more real and distorted and their models twitching unnaturally. It scared you.

If you played as a different killer, you’d get disconnected mid-match much faster. Yet whenever you switched back to Trickster, the game stabilized.

Then one night, you apparently made a mistake. Out of curiosity, you went up and purchased another killer. the Oni, which you considered to be a change of pace. The moment you returned to the killer selection screen, it flickered; static sprinkling the menu. Trickster’s model was there on the right, but his grin had vanished. His head tilted, his bright pupils narrowed into thin slits of displeasure.

Your hands trembled over the keyboard. “It’s just a game…” you murmured, shaking your head and blinking a few times. Then his voice, unlike any recorded line or in-game effect, but unmistakably real, echoed through your headset. Smooth and cold.

"Not to me, 공주님2."

Deep down, you knew this game was no longer the same. But you played it off as a lack of sleep this time around, shut down the PC, and took a well-earned break.

You naively came back a few hours later. You loaded into the Temple of Purgation, picking the Oni. You’d bought him for a reason, after all. But as the match began, the camera panned over the environment and, for a split second just before it faded to your POV, you saw him.

Not the Oni. The Trickster.

He stood at the very edge of the mists, just beyond the temple’s crumbling stone archways. The fog curled unnaturally around him, clinging to his figure like something alive, shifting and parting just enough to reveal the glow of his golden eyes. He wasn’t moving, wasn’t part of the match. He was just… watching.

The moment you took control, he was gone. Your fingers twitched over the keyboard. That wasn’t normal. Maybe a graphical glitch? Some weird overlap from previous matches? You shook it off and pressed forward.

At first, the game ran fine. You chased down survivors, activated your power, played the match as you normally would. But something felt off. A heaviness in the air, a strange, crawling sensation at the back of your neck. Then the game began to stutter. Not lag and neither was it a bug. The frames dragged deliberately, as if the game itself resisted your input. The Oni’s movements felt sluggish, like wading through thick and invisible muck.

And then came the laughter. Soft and breathy, slithering between the sounds of gameplay.

"Tch. This isn’t like you, 자기야1. You’d rather be that clunky old fossil than me? Where’s your sense of taste?" His accent runs heavy alongside the bite in his tone.

Your blood ran cold. That wasn’t an in-game line. Your eyes flicked to one of the killer’s perk icons. Oni’s nemesis perk, just as you’d chosen. For a brief moment, Ji-Woon’s smirking face in a similar art style replaced it before snapping back. Your stomach twisted as another hitch in the frame rate distorted the screen. Pixels twisting as if a presence bled into the code.

"You're ignoring me," he observed, his voice still smooth but tinged with bitter distaste.

The game audio warped beyond recognition, the chase music slowed to a sickening drag then sped up erratically, like a scratched CD skipping. The survivors’ animations twitched unnaturally. Every time you activated the killer’s skill, the deep, guttural roar sounded way off. Higher, smoother, mocking. Obviously replaced with the voice of a certain Killer. "Not so fun, huh?" You hear him huff in amusement, teasing you as he does.

Frustrated, you slammed the Escape key. Nothing happened. The match wasn’t over, but you couldn’t do this anymore. With shaky hands, you forced your PC off manually, the screen cutting to black. Your reflection stared back at you in the dark monitor with wide eyes reflecting unease. You ripped off your headset and exhaled hard. It was just a game, you told yourself. You even debated uninstalling it. But that was ridiculous, wasn’t it? It’s just a game.

So you didn’t play it for the rest of the night.

The next day, curiosity won out. You had planned to delete the game. To scrub it from your system and be done with whatever hellish events had occurred. But after you booted up your PC, a Steam pop-up appeared.

Your pulse quickened as you skimmed the message.

Dead by Daylight – Security Update

A large leak had been addressed. Some players had reported strange in-game activity. An exploit that allowed hackers to take control of matches, resulting in unusual interactions. The developers apologized for the inconvenience. As compensation, a DLC of your choice would be free upon logging in.

Your fingers hovered over the mouse. This had to be the reason. Just some script kiddies messing with the servers, triggering audio or animation glitches. You exhaled a sigh of relief and launched the game.

The menu loaded smoothly, the music creating a subtle backdrop as you navigated the interface. Your gaze shifted to the killer selection screen. Trickster stood in his usual spot after you’d selected him. His stance casual yet confident, the infamous bat balanced nonchalantly on his shoulder. He executed that distinct head tilt. The one accompanied by an unnecessarily seductive "ah,". At that moment, his animation seemed to hesitate, his eyes lingering on the screen a fraction longer than usual. The light caught his left earring, making it glint momentarily before falling back against his neck due to retaining the previous angle of his head. Then, just as smoothly, the bat returned to his side.

Despite the brief, unsettling pause, his expression remained unchanged. A confident smirk played across his lips when he moved to inspect his bat, his golden eyes glinting with sharp amusement, as if privy to a joke you hadn’t yet figured out. No flickering. No static. Everything appeared perfectly normal.

Your tense shoulders loosened slightly. Maybe you had imagined it all. The breach is fixed, after all. You claimed your free DLC, already planning to test out the desired killer and survivor later. But first… just one more match with the Trickster.

Your cursor hovered over the Play button for a second before you clicked. The match queued instantly. No lobby, no loading delay, no lag. Your gut twisted. As the screen transitioned, unease slithered down your spine. The game had loaded, but something was obviously wrong.

The usual environmental sounds; distant caws of crows, the occasional metallic groan of the Entity’s influence, were gone. You panned the first-person camera over the map. No survivors moved between cover. No crows startled into the air. No gens sparking in the distance. Just you. Alone.

Your eyes darted to the UI. The HUD was intact- your abilities, perks, and power displayed as they should be. And yet, there were no objectives. No unseen timer counting down. No signs of life. Just silence. A cold prickle crawled over your skin.

Then, a soft chuckle. Rich, amused, present. "Finally. Just us." Your breath hitched. The sound came through your headset. Close. Way too close.

The screen flickered. Your blood ran cold.

No…

You tried moving Trickster forward, pressing the left mouse button to swing through the empty air. He responded as normal. Smooth, precise, as if performing a well-rehearsed act. But there was nothing to do. No generators humming to life, no players fleeing, no exit gates. The map lay barren, stripped of its usual chaos. Each time you struck the environment in boredom, a mocking chuckle, sly and knowing, echoed in your ears.

Desperate, you opened the pause menu, but there was no option to leave the game. Your fingers trembled over the keyboard as you muttered, “What the hell is it this time?”

Then a soft laugh, closer and intimate, as though whispered from right beside you. "Aw, don’t look so spooked,공주님2. Isn’t this what you wanted? More time with me?"

Without warning, the camera shifted. Its movement not commanded by you, but as if pulled by an unseen hand. The perspective tilted down ever so slightly, as if the Trickster was studying himself.

No. As if he was studying you.

"You play me so often," his voice purred, smooth as silk and dripping with amusement. "Devoted, aren’t you? You never thought I’d actually notice, did you? Never thought I’d appreciate your little habits?" A chill crawled up your spine.

 “This can’t be it. This isn’t real,” you whispered, almost pleading. “You are not sentient,” you insisted, but your voice wavered- thinning into uncertainty.

"Mmm, that's what you keep telling yourself," he replied, that familiar, teasing lilt threading through his tone. "A cute little parrot, endlessly repeating the same little song. 정말 웃기잖아, 자기야3. If only you repeated my name like that instead. I’m as real as I can get. " Your breathing grew shallow.

Then something shifted in the distance. A subtle, unnatural shadow moving where it shouldn’t be. You spun the camera up and to the side, heart hammering, but the map remained empty. Still, the sensation of being watched crawled over your skin. Your hands grew clammy as you gripped the mouse like a lifeline. You needed to leave. Now.

Alt + F4. Task Manager. Nothing worked. Your pulse pounded in your ears. Your body braced for a potential scenario- the chase, the hunt, the moment his blades would sink into your flesh. You weren’t special. You were just another victim…

Right?

Then the screen flickered. A brief stutter, a pause. For a fraction of a second, the game froze, and when it stabilized, Trickster’s weapon was gone. He wasn’t on it anymore.

Your hands froze over the keyboard for a second, before you abruptly stood up and took a step back, already leaning down to forcibly shut down the computer. A hand suddenly shot towards you after it suddenly angled its way back onto the screen. Distinctively bloody as it reached for you. You gasped audibly as you almost fell backward… But the hand never breached the screen. It halted abruptly at the boundary, suspended between the digital world and your reality. Crimson droplets clung to its outstretched fingers as it quivered against an invisible barrier. For a fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse. A flash of yellow fabric and a hint of a naked, muscular chest splattered with blood. But the view was distorted, obscured by the in-game camera’s interference, as if the interface itself rejected his intrusion.

Then came a low murmur. A string of curses in Korean, rough and frustrated. Though you couldn’t make out every word, the anger in his tone was unmistakable, raw even, as he cursed the limits that kept him at bay. Almost immediately, the bitterness dissolved into his familiar, self-assured mockery before he slipped off the screen.

"이건 정말 불공평해요, 공주님4," he drawled, voice dripping with playful disdain. A mind game. It had to be it. "If only this screen wasn’t in the way. 당신은 아직 모르는 재밌는 것들을 놓치고 있습니다5."

The taunting words slithered through your headset. His crazed laughter, edged high with mischief and frustration, filled the silence afterwards.

In that moment, your heart pounded with a mixture of terror and panic. At the end of the day, the screen itself remains unchanged. A game paused on an empty map, the digital world eerily still. Yet Trickster’s presence still lingered at the edge of reality. You could sense it.

With eyes wide, you forcibly shut down the PC, yanking out every cable from the back of your computer screen and desktop afterwards. You vowed to never, ever play Dead by Daylight again. Not after everything you’d just experienced. After all, who knows what might have happened if he had truly breached his way into your room. You believe that he’d most definitely would have tortured you to death, unaware of his true intentions. You could only shiver in fear and disgust at the very thought of it.

----------

1 = 자기야 = jagiya = babe.

2 = 공주님 = gongjunim = princess

3 = 정말 웃기잖아, 자기야. = jeongmal usgijanh-a, jagiya.= It's so funny, babe.

4 = 이건 정말 불공평해요, 공주님 = igeon jeongmal bulgongpyeonghaeyo, gongjunim = This is so unfair, princess.

5 = 당신은 아직 모르는 재밌는 것들을 놓치고 있습니다. = Dangsin-eun ajig moleuneun jaemissneun geosdeul-eul nohchigo issseubnida. = You're missing out on fun things you don't know about yet.

[errorwarblesrr]

do you like totk or botw better?

In short: Yes, I like botw better.

Here are my reasons, though!

I know a lot of people view it as the better experience, which is completely subjective and valid if you do and like it better, but I just view botw as being better in almost every way.

I will give it to totk. The dungeons have a lot better atmosphere. The game has some extremely high highs with the build-up to the wind temple, the whole great sky island segment, and the final boss is a much better fight (though dark beast ganon has a better theme song imo).

Other than that, I prefer botw. Totk has a much grander story, but it's completely mishandled. You can argue that totk has a great story but has poor execution, and to me, execution plays a big role in what makes a story good. You can have good ideas bit it all falls apart if they aren't executed well which ends up making the story bad. It's not that totk has a good story with poor execution, it has good ideas but the bad execution leads to a poorly told story. (I hope that makes sense). Botw has less of a story and is more like a set of events. Botw has history and backstory that is told more organically. Link has amnesia so he slowly regains some of his memories of the past with some people trying to help fill him in. It feels more real...in a weird fantasy way. I guess totk is similar with how we see Zelda's memories, but not really? It's weird to explain. Everything 100 years ago is felt in present day botw while in totk most of those things don't really matter as it happened so long ago. Things only start to resurge because Zelda wanted to investigate under the castle. Totk also has twists like a story. Idk if this is making sense but that's how I feel on their stories. There was just not much botw could mess up on story wise as the way it was presented.

Gameplay wise I can not lie totk is technical marvel with the zonai tech. That's the most impressive thing about it. Tbh building contraptions isn't my thing though, it takes too long to make and experiment with a machine when I can just do whatever that machine was gonna do much faster. I see why people have a lot of fun with it though, it just isn't my thing. One thing I HATE in totk though is the amount of menuing I have to do. Elemental arrows had a serious downgrade. Yeah it's cool to fuse stuff to arrows, but not when I have to do it to ever single individual arrow and if I want to try something new I have to scroll past 50 other items in a single line. It's just tedious. If I want to use a good weapon I have to go to the menu, drop an item, and menu again to fuse it to a weapon that will still break. Item breaking is still an issue but it's more annoying and the weapons no longer look cool. Totk has some cool abilities, but idk I'd trade them all for remote bombs lmao. I hate going through caves, especially early game, and having to deal with the rock walls where they want me to fuse a rock to a stick 10 times to get through one cave. There's just a lot of little things gameplay wise that bug me. They doubled down on botws gameplay issues and added some more annoying ones. I don't even have to mention the sages abilities, that's a whole mess.

On the topic of gameplay, botw just has the better world. Idc, exploring that world for the first time is an unforgettable experience. Totks main world is too similar so the magic is gone. The sky and depths are also unimpressive and repetitive. Botw also has the benefit on how the word felt so lonely yet alive. Everything had a purpose or a story. The world has a history. And totk just doesn't have that. Outside of the upheaval, totk doesn't really build on botws world that much. I was hoping to see if they would've added new towns or see how they'd rebuild hyrule, but they really didn't do that. We only got lookout landing, which doesn't really count as a town, and a bunch of building stuff lying around which is cool I guess. Hateno has a school and Terry Town expanded a little, but with the estimate of about 5 years since botw it makes you wonder...what have these people been doing? We can theoretically build Terry Town in one day. There could be new towns.

Totk is a sequel that doesn't really acknowledge it's predecessor which is so odd. Botw stands on its own and is an overall more cohesive experience. Everything in the world feels purposefully crafted for that world while totk just slaps things on top of it with not much thought. Botw has some amazing world building while for totk it's either "the Zonai did it" or has some contradictory world building. For example, the old sages lifted up the sky islands so that Link would be protected from Ganondorf shenanigans, but then other sky islands suggest how they've been around long before Rauru since young Zonai used to train in them or something. There is also how Zelda says Link never leaves her side, but people she interacts with on an almost daily basis do not recognize him and how even treat as if he doesn't know some facts about her. So either she is overexaggerating by a lot and/or lying in her own diary or that people in hyrule have the collective memory of a rock. There's also Zelda supposedly never giving Link the champions leathers yet as a gift, but we see him wearing it in the beginning. Idk there's more contradictories, but I haven't experienced this for botw??? Totk is so disconnected and disjointed in comparison.

I'm trying to be vague but there's a lot to say, I'm sorry. I really was enjoying this game at the beginning but the more I played the more I noticed or saw things that bugged me and just kept adding up and up on each other. Botw was never like this for me. It's just more cohesive and I like that. There are so many other things I haven't brought up like the repetitive cutscenes, or missing characters/characters that SHOULD know Link but don't (namely Bolson and Hestu). But this post is long. I can't keep complaining about this game. Botw really is that one of a kind experience, and totk tries to replicate it but worse. Botw had a vine that totk lacks. You feel so alone, but you meet knew people and make friends. You build connections as you learn about the past and help those around you. There is no story, you're just a person going through the motions and exploring the vast world around you. Totk can't replace that for me. I'm the main character playing a side role in a disjointed world where not much makes sense. Everything is similar in all the wrong ways.

And most important of all, they took away Link's fun dialogue and personality now he really is bland asf and used to defend that he wasn't.

[personasintro]

I DONT MEAN ANY HARM WITH WHAT IM ABOUT TO SAY IT IS JUST MY OPINION

im finding difficulty in understanding mh's fanbase nowadays...like it's becoming so childish. all people ever wanna do is complain and demand updates. and especially with whats happening with wattshit and stuff. like if you dont want to wait and you arent patient enough then you can just leave...why be so toxic?

(ofc im not talking about everyone, just the elementary school babies who read smut 24/7 😄)

much love mimi <3

Almost every writer experiences demanding readers and their comments, if not every. I don’t mean to sound as if I’m complaining all the time because that’s far from the truth, I often try to see it from a more positive perspective and I’ll be forever thankful that people are invested and excited about my stories. Trust me, 90% of the time I just ignore those kind of comments because I know it’s something every writer is going through. And it’s obvious the more readers the story has, the more comments like this it will get. I mainly speak about it when I’ve had enough and why I spoke recently is exactly this reason.

I told myself to be a little bit more open, even though I didn’t have to be. It wouldn’t take a genius to figure out that the whole deleting story issue was already enough. I also spoke about my online and offline struggles. Then many people started copying, reposting and translating MH which I never allowed and never will. I had to deal with that every day, a couple of times actually. Why I decided to speak up again is because like I said before, I’ve had enough and I thought those people are selfish in a way, even though they’re obviously excited. But being a little more empathetic in a time like this, or ever actually, isn’t some kind of impossible task.

I got so much more selfish asks and comments from readers, but I decided to not share them because it won’t do any good. But sometimes I get annoyed too and I feel like it’s important to show this side too, set boundaries and all that. I know not everyone will understand that, based on some of the reactions readers had. But that’s okay. At least I said something and if they still decide to be assholes, that’s on them.

[ordinaryschmuck]

Finished the main story campaign in Spider-Man 2

What I liked

There were some AWESOME action set pieces. Sandman's boss fight, the prison transfer, Kraven's den, chasing Black Cat, and hunting the Lizard just to name a few.

The swinging is still fun and I LOVED the web-wings. There are times when I go in for a glide, hoping to get to the checkpoint without needing to swing. It's more addicting than it should be.

LOVED Kraven. Probably the best adaptation of him yet with an interesting motivation that makes sense for a character like him.

Miles' little story with Mister Negative is ALSO interesting, and I like how it ended, especially with what they do with Martin in the end. It's pretty good.

The boss fights are a huge improvement, adding in a health bar that lets you know how far along you're kicking ass and making each fight feel like a battle WON. It's frustrating that I got MY ass kicked more times than not, but each time I finally beat the boss it I EARNED that victory.

That brief moment where I was killing people as Venom was super fun in a sick way. PLEASE make that Venom Spin-off game, Insomniac. We want you to just for gameplay alone.

Peter giving into the madness of the symbiote is handled pretty well. It DOES feel like he becomes a little more evil quicker than he should have, but I blame that on me going through the game's story mode and actively avoiding the side missions until I finished the campaign. Everyone's gameplay experience is different and something that feels fast in the story might not feel as fast to others.

MJ's stealth missions are actually pretty exciting this time...a bit bullshit that SHE can take care of certain goons, but at least I'm not wasting time hiding anymore. And that final mission with her was surprisingly fun and intense.

I liked those prequel scenes of Peter as a teen. Really sold how young he was when starting out as Spider-Man.

What I Didn't Like

THAT GOSH DANG PARRY SYSTEM! I'm willing to blame my own lack of skill for this, but I HATE parrying. I almost NEVER get it right, and it sucks when fighting foes where parrying is a requirement to beating them. And it's extra bullshit when the game throws in attacks you HAVE to dodge and get super FUCKED when you parry instead. It made combat more frustrating than fun, and actually hurt my enjoyment in the combat, which I INTENSELY enjoyed from the first game and the Miles Morales spin off.

And don't even get me started on those horseshit checkpoints! Every time I start over, I am filled with DREAD that I have to do all that annoying difficult shit all over again because I didn't get to this exact point the game wanted me to get to.

It doesn't make sense that Kraven has goons. He works best as a solo act and I don't get what his minions get out of working for him. I know it's to give us more people to fight against, but it doesn't work for me.

Norman Osborn is surprisingly underutilized in this game? Like, with how much of a prominent role Harry has, there's not much of a need for Norman, nor a valid reason to be there other than get pissed off over what happens near the end. It feels like his character was an afterthought, which is strange for someone who's meant to be the Green Goblin soon.

Harry's character...gets worse the more the game goes by. He started out interesting as someone both clinging to the past and trying desperately to pick up his life right where he left it. But as the game goes on and it tries to push this...idea with him, it doesn't really work as there's not enough time to properly develop it. It was a good idea with not that great of an execution.

Miles' suit...I don't hate as much as the rest of the people who played the game, but I do think it's nonsense that Miles made it while the city was being destroyed. Yeah, Peter made a new suit in the end of the last game, but there you can argue that it's for practicality purposes in order to get the upper hand against Doc Ock. Miles just made a new suit because he thought it looked cool...It does not.

AND WHERE ARE THE AVENGERS?! It didn't make sense that they didn't show up in the first game, and it makes even LESS sense now! Like, you really expect me to believe that NONE of the Avengers were available at the moment? NONE?! Not even Hawkeye?! At this point, I expect the third game to end a similar way Peacemaker did, where Peter and Miles are carrying away a bleeding out MJ after this big apocalyptic fight, and the Avengers show up JUST as its over only for Peter to go, "You're too late, assholes!" And now that I say it...that would actually be pretty funny. But it's still nonsense that they're not there!

And that's about it. 8/10 game, not as great as the first one, but still pretty fun.

[prlite]

had a rlly interesting meditation session last night whilst channelling & connecting to my higher self. i've been (admittingly) slacking due to repeatedly getting sick and a lot of annoying circumstances happening so it had been a while since i had meditated especially for a long time.

i feel like at times due to my circumstances, i get a bit too tired or too lazy to remind myself that i am more than my physical body & more than the situations that i'm put in — like i'd rather slowly slip back into the old mindset & old story (which ik is obviously not good)

but also hilariously enough i never fully go back to my old mindset so i'm stuck in this weird limbo where i dont feel motivated enough to fully acknowledge and embody my true self but i dont feel demotivated enough to completely give up and fall into the old story and go on with life hating everything about myself — idk if its a good thing or a bad thing

but after my very long meditation session, i realised that me slowly faltering and being demotivated all comes from this feeling that i'm crazy for believing this (i'm not the type of person to put other people's beliefs above mine, but i was sadly in a shitty friendgroup that demonised all of this for like 6 months last year...and its lingering in the shadows) or that its just too much effort — but that idea of it being so much effort comes from me actually putting too much effort into it (con of being a chronic black&white thinker).

i randomly meditated on a whim, halfasleep and in need of an energy boost & time to relax and i feel so much better than i usually do and way more regulated and it didnt even need breathing exercises — it usually doesnt need to take so much effort for me cuz i have been doing this for nearly 5 years now but at the same time i feel like whenever i say this people dont rlly believe me and it makes me feel like im crazy...like wow, am i just pretending to meditate for an hour because im not doing it to silence...or because i move here and there...or because i dont do breathing exercises

but whilst i was meditating yesterday i realised when you constantly listen to other people's experiences and start to make them personal & compare — you're going to be stuck. something like meditation or manifesting or even shifting, theyre all personal things and all work different from person to person ; people do it for different reasons & have different beliefs. i cannot be the same as every shifter, every meditater & every manifester...i cant carry the exact same beliefs & thought processes and fully embody every single person so why would i go out of my way to compare and try to scale my experiences with others to see which is more "real" or "truthful"...?

the need to constantly put a show on for others, to almost hold myself back because im worried ill be too "far ahead" — these dont come from me being a "good person" even if i try to be one, they come from a lack of self-trust. i'm not here to be a helper, i was not born to simply assist others...i dont need to be a supporting character in my own life.

my experiences, my beliefs — even if they change in the future, they are still things that i go through. what makes other people's beliefs and experiences more real than mine? nothing. they believe it to be real based on their own reasoning, just like how i can do the same. i dont need to play this game of scaling what is more and less real, and watering down my beliefs and who i am solely so its digestable to others who wouldnt bother to do the same for me...that isnt me being kind, thats me being embarrassed.

it might be a harsh wake-up call but if i only depend on others and how they think, whether i intend to or if its just a habit, i may get close to my desired life but i'll never fully be there. it might be a small setback, but i'd rather have this small setback that i can work through now instead of ignoring it like i have been and being stuck in this limbo...

tldr ; quit listening to others and start listening to yourself

prl ✶⋆.˚

[gurugirl]

Okay so I have read all three extras and loved them. Even though the prequel blurb didn't make much sense because in the first chapter it was clear that she did find him attractive but never thought of him like that so I doubt she'd do that intentionally and it was also mentioned that after they danced together at the club only after that Harry thought of her while doing the deed. But it was hot so who cares. And now I have some things to say. Sorry I told you I'd be annoying because that's how I love. When I love something I just can't keep it in. So...

1. I was reading through the tags and there were so many requests for subby harry but I like their dynamic as it is. Because they're not super dom/sub and not super kinky. It's very comfortable very gentle very fragile at the moment, exactly like their relationship at the moment. Maybe when they're more into solid ground....one year or so later...they'd explore the kinkier side of their relationship. Idk to me it feels like their sexual dynamic very much reflects their emotional state, so the fragility of the situation (especially now that they decided to tell Leo) would affect the nature of their bedroom activities. And it's not like she's always been a dominant. It's quite evident that she's confident but she didn't initiate or control things with Leo. We don't know how she'd been with her past partners but she's been with Leo over two years now so she obviously isn't used to being in control now. And with Harry it happened naturally because he wasn't experienced and she was guiding him and he liked whatever she did. But she also lets loose and let's him have his ways. So it's very subtle dom/sub dynamic, which is perfect for them. But I love when Harry whines and begs. It's cute. I also like how confident harry is in general. He's a natural flirt and knows he's attractive and good learner too. He can very well turn into a soft dom and have control and she'd love it. I can imagine him being jealous and dragging her into her room and growling in her ear and just teasing her until she begs and she'd love every minute of it. But he'd still be gentle. We've seen him being very persuasive and her almost giving in to him. She becomes week and loses herself when he's in a commanding attitude. So I wouldn't be surprised if they switch roles. But I think there's no roles they just go with the flow. Like how she let him do what he wanted when she visited him in his dorm and he became subby when they reunited.

2. One more thing I noticed someone said is if yn would ever feel guilty of taking harry away from so many experiences he could have. I remember reading that Harry has dated and had done sexual things before yn. Yes he is only having sex with her. But it's not like Harry doesn't know what being with other people feels like. He gave and received head before and he said none of them did it for him like yn does. So he's not missing out on anything really. They can have all the experience together and they can experiment together

3. Did Parker not recognise Harry at the club? She must know who Leo's son is. I don't think Leo is the type to show photos of his son to his girlfriend so she might not know how Harry looks like. She also must know about the arrangement that yn and Leo have so even if she recognised her at the club or later in her photo, maybe she thought it was someone yn is seeing other than Leo

4. What would Anne think about the situation? Would Harry tell her and would she be supportive and understanding? Or would she hate yn?

5. Harry needs to give yn a nickname that he calls her by. Not ma'am or yn. Ma'am is for bedroom and teasing purposes only. But he needs to call her something sweet but not baby because she calls him baby. Love is very common. I want him to call her something unique that suits their relationship

I was already obsessed with stepdadharry series. But he's mostly an asshole so I'm not really emotionally attached to that. But Oh My God!!!! OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!! You don't understand, A Good Boy has changed my brain chemistry. Like I could die and come back to life just to read this fucking story. And I'm not exaggerating when I say that I have not been able to think about anything else since I started reading this. You're gonna ruin me Miss Guru if you don't bring them back. They're my babies and I love them so much. I can't not think about them and I have came up with so many scenarios and I saw so many good ideas in the tags. I'm gonna remind you of them in another ask cause this is getting too long. Please don't block me 😭

I would never block you for sending me feedback and putting so much thought into what you want to tell me. This is truly amazing - once again!

Thank you so much for this.

For point 1 - I think a more subrry dynamic would be ocasional or not often bc I agree - he’s not truly submissive nor is she truly dominant. There could be elements due to the age difference but overall it’s just as you said.

Point 2 - I think YN dealt with all her guilt before she realized Harry just wanted her. I think they’re both comfortable with everything and now they’re just glad to be together so I agree with you!

Point 3 - I wanted to do a follow up for that part with Parker having posted that video but I think it’s something where there were so many people she didn’t realize who she was videoing. She may have been intoxicated herself and just took a video. Parker might recognize YN but maybe not Harry. Either way I imagined that she didn’t record them specifically, it was just a quick moment of them and then the rest of the video but she didn’t realize.

Point 4 - Anne would definitely have her reservations about YN bc it’s obvious YN married Leo for his money - that was never a secret. So Anne may not trust YN but I think Harry could eventually convince her and she’d come around.

Point 5 - I would love to think of a cute nickname! I’ll have to consider it 💕

Appreciate all your thoughts hon!

Xoxo

[justonemorewallflower]

Hello, another update!! Last time my cousin and I watched BSG we got through Home Part 1 through Epiphanies.

So here's a quick update about her thoughts to all those episodes:

She was ECSTATIC about the Starpollo kiss haha she literally threw her hands up in excitement when it happened then was annoyed when the scene immediately became tense because of Sharon walking in. She thought the kiss was super random but she definitely wasn't mad about it.

Later when Lee talks to Kara in the brig after he had talked to Sharon and tells Kara she isn't the one who should be telling him what to do my cousin said, "brother you literally kissed her." 🤣

She thought the scene where Lee told her he loved her was cute. And she thought it was funny when Kara teased him about it. My cousin was literally the definition of kicking her feet and giggling during this scene.

She was pretty stressed for all the Kobol stuff especially when Elosha stepped on a trap and Tom and his buddy were planning to take out Lee and his dad.

When they found the tomb of Athena and had the vision with all the constellations it just dawned on her that all the colonies were named after the constellations lmao. It took her that long 🤣😭

She still hates Ellen lol she gets so annoyed every time she's on screen haha. She also kind of figured D'Anna was a Cylon so she wasn't surprised to find that out.

She thought the Blackbird was pretty cool. She was annoyed with Helo and Chief fighting over Sharon. She thought it was super cute how everyone signed the ship and they named it after Laura.

She HATED Cain and understandably so.

She hated what happened with Sharon and Helo and Chief and was glad that Thorne died and that Helo and Chief didn't get executed for intervening.

She was SUPER stressed when Kara was given the task to kill Cain and Fisk had the task to kill Bill. As well as Lee just casually dying during all that too. She was so stressed haha and was relieved when Lee got saved and Fisk nor Kara had to murder anyone.

She was glad Gina killed Cain though. She was just glad Cain died haha.

In Epiphanies she really thought Laura was gonna die. She was confused and shocked when Bill kissed her towards the end of the episode.

Also in the one scene Lee and Dee have where their faces ended up close during like fighting practice she did the same thing she had done to Kara and Sam where she went, "get away!" 🤣

She's gonna absolutely hate how those relationships develop and how it'll be both of the pairs she doesn't like.

Also I asked her some thoughts on current ships/couples like which ones she thinks will make it to the end and all and regarding Kara and Lee she thinks they're endgame for sure and I'm just over here sobbing like just wait your opinion on that is about to change real quick and you're gonna be so disappointed/upset 😭

Also at one point where Kara was in danger I made a joke to her about her dying too (this was like after episode where Lee almost died) and she said "she can't die she's a pop figure." And I'm just over here like oh how wrong you are... she's going to be so upset haha

***

Anyway those were her biggest/main thoughts from our last watch session. Today we are going to watch more and I'm so curious because we'll be starting off on Black Market which is bleh but I'll be curious to see her thought on that episode especially since Lee is one of her favorite characters. And I'm also curious to see her reaction to Scar because that is an interesting episode too and pretty Kara centered which is another one of her favorite characters. I also can't wait for her to watch Sacrifice because she is going to be devastated about Billy (in the past episodes at one point she literally said how he can't die and she likes him). She's also gonna be sad about Lee. Like poor Lee can't get a break he gets seriously injured/has near death experiences like 3 times within 5 episodes 😭😭

I am also excited to see her thoughts on Razor!

I'm not sure how much further she and I will make it into season two, I'm kind of hoping we'll finish the season but that's me being optimistic about our time, etc.

I shall keep y'all posted :)

[myrmyrtheorca]

Vent post because I don't really want to talk about it with people but I still need to get it out of my system somehow

I have a graduation party in another region this weekend and I'm losing my mind because it literally ticks all the boxes to be a disaster for my mental health. Firstly I'm in the car with a couple who fights every single time they travel together and one of them drives (if you remember back when I went to Turin a few months ago, it's the friends who almost left us without a car to come back home). I get in fight or flight mode whenever someone raises their voice in anger in my vicinity even if it's not directed at me, and it's especially bad in a car because I cannot escape and have to live through the aftermath as well. So there will be a lot of yelling to begin with. Doesn't help that said friends are really...peculiar drivers..

At the event there will be lots of drinking, I don't drink anymore myself because of bad experiences in the past where people raised their voice at me for being annoying but being near someone who's drunk makes my anxiety skyrocket because of unpredictability (I do very bad with unpredictable events). People will pressure me and will be disappointed that I don't join the drinking but I won't budge on that and so I know I'll get comments for it.

We're sleeping in a hotel in a shared room, which means more anxiety because I'm super uncomfortable sleeping far from home. I'm scared of sleeping near intoxicated people, not because I'm afraid they will hurt me but because of ... really anything else that might happen to an intoxicated person...

At least here in Italy graduation parties feature a range of activities which usually are made to make fun of the person who's just graduated, and that already puts me of...plus I know that most of these activities have the purpose to MAKE the girl drink...they actually plan to make her blackout drunk by the end of the evening and I find it despicable but i have literally 0 say in all of this

Then there's the waking up part, getting everyone ready for checkout, and the whole trip back home...more yelling...more travelling...more speeding through the highway...

I really really don't want to go. I REALLY want to stay home. Home is safe. I don't want to go out there's too much danger I want to stay home I really really fucking want to stay home but nobody will take my fears seriously because everyone around me thinks being drunk to the bone is funny

I will feel like a trapped rabbit the whole time and the day after I have to go to work.

eep

[elftwink]

so this is from someone who also actively plays in and dms campaigns with other systems but personally i love dnd partly because i like the number of arcane rules. i think part of what it is, is my table experiences have been so combat-lite that for me the system has just become tools for solving puzzles and situations. encounters are so few and far between with my usual dm that they become very intense and scary when they do happen, and you can maybe say well that's dnd guy cope to say that this combat sim is better without the combat, and that probably is true. the best version of dnd for me like if i were writing 6e would be to shift the game's mechanical focus away from combat, increase the prominence of utility/ roleplay oriented spells and skills, and encourage DMs not to rely on combat to fill space in the game

yes!! ik im being a hater in my posts rn but i also love dnd, and especially the magic and spell system. it's not perfect obviously, but i have yet to find a ttrpg whose magic system is as engaging to me personally as dnd is. idk it's like exactly the right amount of rules to feel very bound by them while still leaving wiggle room for creative magic choices (either by way of flavour which is whatever you make of it, or by way of doing something that is Technically covered by the spell but probably not intended, which almost always fucks extremely hard).

& also i agree that dnd is kind of too combat focused, and i actually do think it would be better with less (although i suspect that given theres a pretty large contingent of dnd players who play mostly or solely combat, i dont think this is a universal opinion lol), or at the very least if it didn't feel like it dominated the meta decisions you have to make. like when i take new spells i often have to deliberate between the cool utility spell i actually want to take that has no damage component, and the damage based spell that will keep me viable in combat. i wish often these choices were less at odds with each other, or at least if you had a character who needed to be carried through combat that they would have more utility in non-combat scenarios instead of just kind of feeling like dead weight (now i sound like someone who should try another system, lol. but its more varied spells in the existing dnd system that i want!)

also i kind of think dnd has a problem esp at the mid level with keeping combat high stakes and genuinely scary, which is a whole other post where i could ramble lol, but honestly in terms of per table solutions "do combat a lot less" sounds like actually an extremely good way to deal with it. the worst thing in dnd is when combat starts to feel repetitive and like a slog. if it happens rarely it just so so so much easier to avoid that. i could say much more about this but ive already been typing this ask for a gazillion years but the point is i'm stealing your dms tactics for next time i run a game

also to contextualize my baseless haterism posts, i just want to clarify that i don't care in any way if someone plays only 5e/dnd and refuses to play other systems. this is whatever. what annoys me is when such people insist this is because every other game on earth is worse than dnd at everything, somehow, even though they do not know the full rules of dnd and are not super interested in learning. there's a lot to be found there in dnd but you have to like, engage with it. your dm cant read it for you. & its always more fun to be at a table where everyone knows wtf is going on than with players who barely know enough to scrape by and treat the DM like a rules dispensing machine

anyway. your 6e ideas sound awesome, especially more utility spells pleaseeee wotc. life could be so beautiful