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muletia · 1 day ago

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𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐮𝐬 -`♡´-

orion pax x human!reader x d-16 and a sprinkle of platonic x elita <3 pocket spouse au

summary: finally, the time has come to meet your spouse! after joining the Pocket Spouse Program — an Earth-Cybertron friendship pact allowing humans to become partners to bots who wish to have their very own human to love, cherish, and treat as their soft, squishy spouses — you’ve been waiting for so long for your turn to come. and as it turns out, this long-awaited day is full of pleasant surprises <3

cw: fluff, canon divergence because tfo takes place bazilion years before humans, a little bit of jealousy and obsessive thoughts, possessiveness, implied polyamory, implied nsfw thoughts (nothing explicit thought)

word count: 3900

shot out to all the anons and non-anons who gave me a lot of great ideas for this au <3

Armed with a travel bag filled with the most useful items and a backpack stuffed with supplies, you stand before the capsule-shaped elevator. You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself before stepping into the tight, enclosed space, and enter, sealing your fate. The doors close behind you, and without giving you even a second to prepare, the elevator descends rapidly, taking you towards your new life but not granting enough time to fully shake off the old one.

Not that there was much to shake off, considering you had willingly made the decision to join the Pocket Spouse program. Nothing was holding you on Earth, least of all luck, so you decided to seek it elsewhere. And as it happened, you chose to start your search on a planet inhabited by sentient, enormous, transforming robots who, apparently, had quite the fascination with humans. An extreme new beginning, but after hearing only good things about the living conditions and the way humans were treated with care, you figured — why not, if it meant living in luxury?

Of course, you had considered various scenarios in case the rumors turned out to be a sham. You could end up with anyone. A fetishist, a collector of exotic pets, a hoarder of toys. That was the unknown, stressful factor that the speed of the elevator gave you no chance to tame. The decision of which robotic spouse you would be assigned to also did not belong to you, so all you could do was hope for a stroke of luck that you’d end up with someone normal.

You don’t even have time to take another deep, reassuring breath when the capsule comes to a sharp stop, and almost immediately its sliding doors open.

You’re greeted by a metallic face with distinctly feminine features. Beautiful in its strange, alien way, but also serious. One look is enough to tell you that you’re dealing with a bot who is strict and has no tolerance for nonsense, but your first impression naturally shifts when your eyes and her optics meet. Her metal face softens almost instantly, easing your stress just enough for you to regain feeling in your legs. You step out toward the bot, onto a small platform designed specifically for a species of your size, and with each step, the bot seems to grow to an unsettlingly immense scale.

The room is small — or at least it seems that way as you try to translate its dimensions into the standards of the giants who inhabit this planet — and carelessly sterile in dark gray tones. There’s no doubt it was put together in a rush, without much thought, simply to exist and serve its function. Its barrenness is unsettling. So much for a luxurious life of doing nothing?

The bot straightens and pulls a datapad closer as she finally speaks. “[Name] [Last Name], I presume?” You still can’t get over how easily the metal of her face bends and flexes when needed, as if it were made of rubber.

“Exactly.”

She nods her helm. “My name is Elita One. I am the head of this mining sector, and I also hold responsibility for every pocket spouse assigned here. And unless there is a change in management, you answer to me, you listen to me, and you bring all future requests or orders to me.”

Oh. So you got assigned to the working class. Fine, you’ll adjust as soon as you get proper living conditions. “Alright.” The lack of warmth in her demeanor discourages you from wanting to engage in any future interactions, but if she’s your only lifeline to protection from potential mistreatment, you’ll treat her words as gospel. “Nice to meet you.” You smile and extend a hand toward her. She stares at you hesitantly for a moment before finally reaching out a single digit to complete the greeting.

“Likewise.”

Elita doesn’t withdraw her servo, though; instead, she straightens it and clasps her digits together, gesturing for you to climb onto her palm. “For safety.”

“Oh. Thanks.” You accept the invitation, though a red flag starts waving in your mind. You don’t remain on her servo for long, as Elita smoothly and carefully transfers you onto her shoulder.

“I advise you to be careful,” she warns. “Miners rarely interact with pocket spouses, so they might try to touch you or snatch you up in their servos. Do not try to stand, do not lean over, and above all, do not excite them. A simple wave of your hand is enough to send them into a frenzy. Understood?”

Alright, now the stress is back. You hadn’t expected such strong reactions towards humans, especially since this trend od getting pocket spouses was no longer new. “Wait. I thought pocket spouses were already a well-established concept on your planet.”

“Not in these parts,” she sighs. “On the surface, the sight of humans may not cause much of a stir, but things are different down here. For us miners, pocket spouses are a rarity. Only the best can afford them.”

Oh, so even among a highly advanced race of sentient robots, there was still a harmful caste system in place. “Oh, I’m sorry,” you stammer, because what else is there to say in this situation? When she shoots you a sour glance, you decide to change the subject, hoping to save your image from seeming callous and naïve. You clear your throat. “So, I assume you already have your own pocket spouse?”

She gives you a pointed side-eye. She saw right through your plan.

“Of course, I do. Do I need to repeat myself about being careful, or is everything clear?”

“Clear as day.” You don’t need to see her faceplate to know that this human phrase is unfamiliar to her. Feeling her impatient side-eye on you, you awkwardly correct yourself, “Yes.”

“Good. If you have anything else you’d like to know, now is the time to ask. I assure you, you won’t have time later.”

“My spouse. What are they like?”

“Spouses,” she corrects nonchalantly, not even looking up from her datapad, throwing you completely off.

“Spouses? Do I get one for free?”

Elita does not appreciate your attempt at humor. She sends you a sharp look.

“In a manner of speaking. Officially, a pocket spouse is assigned to a single bot, but there are cases of sharing. Or, if by some miracle, a human ends up with a conjunx. But I haven’t heard of such cases.”

Conjunx? That’s a new word, and it means absolutely nothing to you, but you decide to store it in your memory for later, too distracted by the fact that you’ve been assigned to a pair.

“Okay, I definitely wasn’t expecting that.”

“Does that make you uncomfortable?”

“No. I think? I don’t know yet, you caught me off guard.” You take a deep breath. You’ll manage. Somehow. “So, my spouses. What are they like?”

Elita’s expression darkens, and that, in turn, unsettles you. That couldn’t be a good sign.

“What is it? Did I get assigned to some creeps?”

“Worse,” she huffs. “D-16 is a decent mech and an exemplary miner, and officially, he is your spouse. But Orion —” she grips the datapad tighter as if restraining herself from an outburst “—Orion is the most foolish, irresponsible, and reckless bot on all of Cybertron. And if you think I’m exaggerating, you’re gravely mistaken. He attracts trouble like a magnet and throws himself into it because he is incorrigible. I almost pity you, really, because you couldn’t have gotten a worse match. Even Darkwing would have been a better spouse.”

But… as if fighting her own thoughts, she adds, “For all their recklessness… they worked very hard to have you, and I know they will treat you well. Perhaps clumsily at first, but well. That doesn’t change the fact that Orion has an empty canister instead of a processor, so if he does something idiotic, and he will, you are to report it to me immediately.”

Galncing at the datapad, she adds "Do you want to know anything else? We don't have much time for idle chatter."

"Just one thing. You mentioned that there's already a human in this sector. Can you arrange for us to meet sometime soon? It’d be nice to have occasional contact with someone like me."

"We'll see what can be done," she replies warily, clearly displeased with the idea. Her answer makes it obvious that there's a high chance you’ll be left hanging rather than meeting your fellow human, but you’re not giving up that easily.

"Thanks," you say. Out of politeness, feeling an even stronger urge to stay on her good side.

"Shall we begin?"

You take a deep breath. You’re doing this. You’re meeting your extraterrestrial partners, cementing your future on this planet. Your hesitation lasts only a moment — just a brief weighing of pros and cons, an instant of fighting the urge to turn around and run back to the elevator. Less than a second is all it takes for you to give your answer.

"Yes, I want to meet them."

"Be careful," she warns sharply, one last time. "I've worked too hard for this job to lose it now because of human irresponsibility."

Elita takes a step forward, and you have to grab onto her helm to keep your balance, but thankfully, an exaggerated optic-roll is her only reaction to the excess contact. The next steps aren’t as shocking; by the third, you’ve adjusted to the rhythm of the giant leading you to a set of sliding doors, which she opens with a button on the side.

Your pocket spouses certainly know how to make… an intriguing first impression.

Caught off guard by the sudden opening of the doors, they literally tumble into the room and land on the floor, shooting you a lightning-fast glance before scrambling to their pedes at record speed, straightening up as if nothing happened. Their excited grins grow quickly and they’re clearly contagious, because you feel your own lips curling into a smile.

They look masculine and young, as much as you can say that about beings whose tissues don’t age. What grabs your attention most is the bot with yellow optics. You haven’t seen such a unique color among their kind before. Maybe you haven’t met many bots yet, but you could swear most had blue optics. Interesting... You make a mental note to compliment those bright, captivating optics later.

Your gazes meet, and the mech with the unusual, beautiful optics parts his lips slightly. You get the feeling he wants to say something, but excitement completely paralyzes him.

"Well, that was a stunning performance. Was eavesdropping worth it?"

"Ahem, no... we weren't eavesdropping," Orion defends himself, though his gaze remains fixed on you.

"Forgive us, Elita, you just caught us off guard when you opened the door so suddenly," D-16 adds, having suddenly regained control over his body.

They step closer, as if hypnotized, drawn to minimizing the distance, but Elita halts them with an outstretched arm. They stop, but their lovestruck expressions make it clear that their minds are already revolving solely around you.

"Ugh, pull yourselves together," Elita scolds. "You won’t lay so much as a digit on your pocket spouse until you’ve listened to the protocol, so focus."

"Mhm, yeah, yeah."

"Now do you understand what I was talking about earlier?" she directs at you. "I wish you Primus' patience with these two airheads."

"Oh, come on, they’re quite charming," you remark — but it turns out to be unnecessary, as the eruption of joy at hearing your voice is nearly impossible for even Elita to suppress.

Both of them surge forward, their excited cheers and cooing echoing through the empty room, bombarding you with loud adoration.

"Didn’t I just say something about getting them worked up?!" Elita hisses at you, but the sharp tone doesn’t sit well with your partners, their expressions suddenly sober as they feel the instinct to stand in your defense.

"Elita, leave them alone," Orion intervenes. "They’ve done nothing wrong."

"I knew this would happen," Elita sighs. "Enough. Let me recite the protocol so we can all go our separate ways, because I don’t have time to babysit all of you."

She looks at the two mechs before her to make sure they’re listening, but it quickly becomes evident they have no intention of cooperating today.

"Primus, focus! Do you think I have time to waste? Unlike you, empty cans, I have a ton of work to do and I'd like to finish it before my shift starts."

Still seeing their dazed, absentminded expressions, Elita decides to escalate.

"Do I have to take your pocket spouse away for you to finally pay attention?"

Orion snaps out of his trance first, alarmed at the idea of you being taken away.

"What? No, no! We’re listening now, boss."

"Next time, there won’t be a verbal warning. I’ll smack you both on the helms, and that’ll be the end of your pocket spouse respecting you."

Of course, a reprimanding servo-to-helm contact was unavoidable when it became clear they were drifting off again. But after the protocol was recited, a datapad signed, and you were informed that regular supplies of human fuel and clothing would be delivered to you, the long-awaited moment of your "eviction" from Elita’s shoulder finally arrived.

She steps closer to the two bots, who extend their servos with interlaced small digits toward you so you can transfer safely. Grabbing your bag, you carefully step from her shoulder onto their servo, at last entering physical contact with your spouses.

"You have a few clicks of free time before your shift starts," Elita informs them. "And if you’re even a nanoklik late, I swear you’ll be pulling overtime."

She gives you one last soft, almost sympathetic look, so out of place with her previous authoritative tone before leaving, closing the door behind her.

Two pairs of optics focus on you.

You gaze into them, sinking into the moment, finally understanding what Elita meant about their fascination with humans. Because looking into their dazzling optics, brimming with excitement and adoration, you find yourself experiencing that same fascination with their alien race, even though you’ve met other bots before.

You can truly call yourself a pocket spouse now, completely leaving your past life behind. And you sincerely hope this one will be better. That Orion and D-16 will make it so, though you have no guarantee.

"Hello," you say warmly.

"Hi," they reply almost simultaneously.

D-16 can’t hold back any longer. He extends his servo toward you, eager to finally acquaint himself with the texture of your body, but he hesitates the moment he feels you shiver ever so slightly, struck by your fear.

"Ah, I’m sorry, don’t be afraid," he says.

A bad start. A very bad start. He worries he’s already tainted your budding relationship, that his reckless excitement has scared you enough that you won’t give him a chance to open up. But you quickly soothe his fears.

"It’s okay, really. You can touch me if you want."

Their youthful, boyish excitement returns, softening their handsome metal faces — and your heart along with them.

"Just be careful," you remind them. "Humans are quite prone to accidental squishing."

"We’ll remember," D-16 promises. "We’d never hurt you. Right, Orion?"

"Of course. You’ll be completely safe with us."

"Alright, I believe you." Not entirely. You want to believe them. But if what Elita said was true, then they would stay true to their word if they worked so hard to be assigned a human. Only fools would deliberately destroy the fruits of their labor. "So? Do you want to touch your pocket spouse?"

Your pocket spouse. Your. Theirs. Theirs and only theirs.

It’s a dangerous thought for a miner, because the concept of ownership had been limited to just a recharge station and the locker next to it. Everything else was shared. Shared washracks, shared habsuites, shared berths for resting. There was no room for theirs.

But you were theirs. Truly, undeniably, and tangibly theirs. Only theirs. And they wanted it to stay that way. Theirs to touch, theirs to give attention to, theirs to talk to and compliment. Not for Jazz, not for Wheeljack, not for Sideswipe, and no longer for Elita. Theirs. It was beautiful and terrifying at the same time because you were burdening them with responsibilities they had never known before. Theirs. They couldn’t rely on anyone else anymore.

They exchange a brief, knowing glance. Theirs. They cannot ruin this. They cannot make mistakes. You have to like them, just as they instantly fell in love with you, and see them as good spouse material. They will show you that they can take care of you. Their pocket spouse. Theirs. Only theirs.

"What’s wrong? You don’t want to?" you ask teasingly, snapping them out of the traps of their own thoughts.

"Oh, Primus, of course we do. Very much. You have no idea how much," Orion confesses.

They were both brave, but it’s Orion who makes the first move. His servo finds your back, pressing against it with a single digit. Soft. Oh, so soft.

Once, he asked Elita what her pocket spouse felt like, and that was the answer he got. He didn’t understand it then. What was softness? What kind of sensation was it? What could he compare it to? But now… now he knew that softness was you, and you were softness. And if he could, he would never let you go.

"Wow, incredible. D, this is incredible, unlike anything else. You’re… extraordinary!"

He gently strokes your back, and you allow yourself to wrap your hand around his massive metal finger, which Orion welcomes with a beaming, delighted smile. How was it possible that your servo was even softer? Or maybe somewhere else, you were even softer still. He’d heard that humans and Cybertronians were compatible, and though he knows it’s not exactly proper to let his mind drift into impure, carnal territories so early in the relationship, cannot stop himself from dreaming of drowning in your softness. Wants to be surrounded by it. Wants to be suffocated by it. Wants to feel it after every shift, wake up in it and recharge.

Impatient with his partner’s sluggishness and selfishness, D-16 clicks his glossa.

"Move your digit, Pax, it’s my turn now."

It takes Orion a few nanokliks to pull himself away from his indecent thoughts. He doesn’t want to let you go, doesn’t want to be more than a few centimeters away from you ever again, but he knows D will smack him on the still-fresh sore spot left by Elita on his helm if he doesn’t pull his servo back. So he does. And immediately, he is consumed by an overwhelming sense of loneliness and emptiness, as if his life has suddenly become incomplete. He already wants to come back to you.

D-16’s reaction is similar. Awe at the new but pleasant texture manifests in his slightly parted intake and quick strokes across your back, searching for and discovering softness. Where your hand meets his digit, an incomparable warmth spreads, giving him a sense of completeness. You, him, and Orion. Three puzzle pieces that fit together perfectly, finally reunited after years of separation.

"I’m glad you like me," you laugh. "That’s a good start, huh?"

"It was good the moment we saw you," Orion says. "Really, we couldn’t have imagined a better pocket spouse."

"You’re too kind," you reply. You know they’re speaking from excitement, their minds weaving intricate visions and fantasies about life with a pocket spouse — visions that might not be so rosy in reality — but you don’t want to ruin it for them. Especially since you want to find a good life here, too. You want to be happy, regardless of the expectations they unknowingly place upon you. If they want to play house, you’ll join them. If they have a human fetish, you’ll indulge them in that too. "I think we’ll be happy together, won’t we? I’d like that."

"We will, for sure!" Orion assures enthusiastically.

"We know we’re just lousy miners, and you won’t have any luxuries," D-16 adds, earning a sharp elbow to the side from Orion. "I wasn’t finished, Pax." He elbows him back. "But we’ll do our best to make sure you have a good life with us. We’ll do everything for you. We’ll get… almost anything, but if you need something from the city, just say the word! Orion or I will get you food, clothes, whatever you need."

"Thanks, you’re sweet," you say, touched by their words. "I know I can’t do much, but maybe I can repay you somehow?"

"Just having you here is enough for now," D-16 says, smiling softly, enchanted by your question.

"Will you touch us again?" Orion asks, only to immediately receive a frustrated elbow. "What? They asked first."

D-16 pinches the bridge of his nose, unable to believe his partner’s tactlessness. Orion’s talent for making things worse had to affect you, it just had to. Just like every fragging time, it would fall on his shoulders to get them out of trouble, and in this case, to make sure you saw them as normal and worthy of being your spouses. They cannot mess this up. At any cost.

Which is why D is surprised when he hears your soft laughter. He lifts his servo from his faceplate and looks at you hopefully. So their relationship wasn’t ruined by Orion’s loose vocalizer?

"Of course. Come closer," you say, encouraging them further by crooking a finger.

Two massive faceplates move toward you simultaneously until they finally touch. They’re so close that you can stroke their cheeks, and so you do, slowly running your fingers over warm, living metal, drowning in their proximity. Orion and D-16 press into your hands, leaning into the comforting, though foreign, softness — now only theirs. Not for perching on Elita’s shoulder anymore. For them. Theirs to be petted, theirs to be embraced.

They could spend a lifetime in this room if it meant constant cheek-stroking and being spoiled by you. Oh, how they couldn’t wait for your shared life. Waking up with you. Coming back to their recharge stations after a hard day’s work, knowing someone was waiting for them. Spending time together. Telling you about Megatronus and Sentinel, showing off their merch, sharing every detail of their lives, and begging you to tell them about yours. About your planet, your interests, your human life — so they could make your life here as good as possible, desperately vying for your affection.

You will like them. You must. Because they already adored you, unconditionally devoted to their beloved pocket spouse. Theirs.

Relaxed and overwhelmed with contentment, they let their engines hum louder.

"Oh? You like this that much?" you ask, totaly not planning to exploit the bots’ ability to purr purely for your own selfish pleasure.

"Very much," Orion rumbles.

"You’re the best," D-16 adds.

For a moment, they open their optics, their gaze focused on you. And the trust flickering within them, the fervor of emotions burning away reason convinces you that you chose well by deciding to become a pocket spouse.

#transformers x reader #transformers one x reader #orion pax x reader #d 16 x reader #pocket spouse au

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darkpetal16 · 1 day ago

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(General / Unspecified) Dancetale Wingding Gaster (Waltz) commissioned by @queen-misogi

This man is harder to catch than a fish going up stream with your bare hands! If he’s not at home, he’s at the lab, and if he’s not at the lab. . . He’s at home! He’s become such a rare sighting in the kingdom that some monsters joke that he’s a myth.

Even Alphys has trouble seeing him. She communicates (near) exclusively through computer messages, or second hand messages through his brothers when they visit.

This, of course, makes it pretty hard to meet, let alone befriend this man.

He’s not opposed to socializing, so much as has no interest in it. He loves his work, and sees little reason to force himself to do things he doesn’t enjoy.

If you do manage to catch this man during one of his wow-he’s-actually-outside! moments, and strike up a conversation with him, you’ll find him to be polite and pleasant. He’s entirely mute, and signs to communicate (although he can conjure literal words, he chooses not to 99% of the time as an excuse not to talk to people). If you can sign back, great! If not? He’s smiling and nodding politely as he walks away from you. He’s now waving goodbye—still smiling politely—as he’s getting into the lab and shutting the door in your face.

This changes, of course, if you ask him to dance.

Like all Dancetale monsters (ignoring Sans), this man can’t refuse a dance. Due to his reclusive lifestyle it is exceedingly rare to find a partner—and to have someone actually ask him? Take initiative? He’s beaming. He’s smiling as wide as can be as he’s eagerly gently taking your hand.

He prefers to take the lead when dancing, but he’s willing to be lead if the dance flows better that way. He’s graceful, elegant, and so sweetly gentle with his partner. You don’t even have to be a good dancer—you can have two left feet for all he cares—he’s just so genuinely happy to dance with someone, and he’s got enough talent to guide you through every move.

Asking to dance with him once is enough to earn you plain affection from him—platonic or romantic.

But seeking him out and doing it again? Repeatedly?

He’s swooning.

You’ve got yourself a lifetime dance partner, congratulations.

If you want that partner to stay platonic, fine by him. He’ll be kind of friend who, no matter how long it’s been since the last conversation, your relationship won’t change. While he may not be there for the small things, he’ll always come cheer you on for the important moments.

If you want that partner to turn romantic. . . He’s certainly not opposed, although you’ll have to make the first moves. Romance isn’t on the forefront of this scientist’s mind. He’ll either need you to be direct with him, or have one of his brothers point it out to him.

As soon as he understands, he’s taking extra steps in his day to meet with you. He’s opening doors for you. He’s ordering lunch for both of you. He’s pulling you into his arms for spontaneous dances.

He won’t say it. He won’t sign it. But he’ll show his reciprocation through acts of service, and intentional time away from his work to be with you.

He is not the jealous type. Far, far away from it. He trusts you implicitly unless you give him a clear reason not to—and if that happens, the relationship is over regardless.

He is, however, unintentionally distant.

There will be times where you have to remind him that sunlight is a thing and maybe he shouldn’t sleep at his desk again. He’ll make an earnest effort for you, but breaking years of work habits will take time.

Even his brothers struggle reminding him.

If you ever feel he’s becoming too distant—just tell him. He will never take offense to that as he fully acknowledges it as something he needs to work on.

Like a plant shoved in a corner, this monster just needs someone to shed a little light and love on his life to let him flourish.

One dance could change it all for him.

So. . . Won’t you ask him to dance?

#darkpetal16 #undertale #undertale au #dancetale #dancetale Wingding #Dancetale gaster #commission #waltz

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wlwsoccerfics · 22 hours ago

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Who are you?(StephCatleyXReader)

Warnings:head injury, memory loss, angst

Summary: you Hit your head during a Game and lose your memory. Having no idea who Steph is. So she tries everything to make you remember.

To say everyone was freaked out when you Hit the Goalpost cause you were pushed into it would have been an understatement. You didn't just went down but you also were unconcious. So they put you on a stretcher and walked into the Tunnels with you. Steph didn't finish the game, Renée told her to go with you. The Game wasn't important right now.

You were put in an ambulance actually cause it took you a few minutes to wake up again. At the hosptial they ran some Tests. You had a pretty Bad concussion and threw up three times already. Your head was pounding actually. Good news there was no brain bleed. Bad News. You lost your memory due to the head injury. Which the doctors and Steph, your wife found out like this.

"i am so glad you are awake, Babe!" Steph said.

"Babe? Who are you calling Babe? And who are you?" You asked. Steph looked shocked. Her head turned to the doctors alarmed.

"i am your wife Steph." She replied.

"i think i would know If i am married!" You answered. The doctor gently motioned for Steph ro leave to room with him so they could talk and for your wife to let go of her emotions cause she was crying already.

"what is going on? Why can't she remember me?" Your wife asked.

"usually those memories come back within 24 hours. It's rare that one is struggling to remember years or months but it can happen. If you have pictures and things that are important to both of you, show her. That usually helps!" He explained.

So Steph called Kyra to let the team know what was going on with you and asked her to grab the Box of Pictures, Concert Tickets and Love Letters you and Steph have written one another over the last 4 years.

Both Alessia and Kyra showed up at the hospital, handing over the box.

"she really doesn't remember you?" Kyra asked.

"not even a little bit." Steph said, wiping away some fresh tears. Alessia rubbed her back gently.

"i am sorry Steph, but she is gonna remember you." Alessia told her.

"thanks, i will try to show her those things now." She looked at the Box and walked back into your hospital room. While Kyra and Less were waiting in the waiting area of the Hospital.

"so you really are my wife." You spoke out after looking at all the pictures. You took an extra long look at the wedding Pictures.

"i am!" Steph told you, offering you a small smile but the hint of pain still visible.

"why don't i remember anything?" You asked her and she explained to you how you had hit your head on the Goalpost during the game. You two spent hours of talking and looking at the things in the Box and you actually ended up remembering it all. Much to everyones relief. Especially your wifes.

Cuddles were in order, so were kisses before you fell asleep in her arms. You were allowed to leave the next day but it took you two months to get back to playing in a game.

#woso request #woso x reader #woso fic #steph catley x reader

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winteringdream · 2 days ago

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𝑴𝑬𝑬𝑻 𝑼𝑮𝑳𝒀 — 𝑻𝑨𝑬𝑺𝑨𝑵

You've had a small crush on Taesan since your first year of university Now that second year has begun, you're determined to get to know him better. Your first meetings with him are ugly to say the least. But as you try to connect with him, you realize that Taesan struggles to show his feelings. Will the two of you manage to show each other how you feel, or will your feelings remain untold?

✩ ⋅ pairing. bio major!taesan x bio major fem!reader ✩ ⋅ genre. fluff, angst, university!au, mutual pining (i tried) ✩ ⋅ warnings. alcohol intake, miscommunication, ankle injury, mentioning of being followed, reader studies quite hard-core, overworking ✩⋅ wc. 10k ✩⋅ with ive's liz & rei, all of bonedo and triples mayu ✩⋅ a/n: no mentioning of y/n, also the you character is somewhat similar to taesan personality-wise ✩⋅ this is part one! part two coming soon

It was a sunny day. the beginning of what was supposed to be a good academic year. It didn’t last long before you managed to completely embarrass yourself in front of Taesan. A guy you may or may not have a small crush on.

Your iced tea had spilled all over his books and clothes when you were admiring a cat.

“I can pay for dry cleaning,” you had blurted out, face burning with embarrassment.

Taesan exhaled sharply, shaking his hands free of the liquid. “Don’t bother.” And then he just walked away.

You were flustered, a mess, to say the least—for five days after the event. Replaying the encounter at least 500 times in your head.

So much for making a good first impression...

You had promised yourself that the next time you’d see him, you’d properly apologise. But you just didn’t think meeting him would happen so soon.

A few leaves had started to fall, and the temperature outside had started to lower. Shivering in your t-shirt, you scold yourself for not bringing a jacket.

You look at the time, realising you’re late for class.

“Shit.” you mutter to yourself. “Class started five minutes ago.”

Running for your life, you manage to reach the building within two minutes. But, then came the problem. You weren’t familiar with this place at all.

Where was room 523 supposed to be?

Out of breath you frantically run upstairs, after realising all the classrooms on the first floor start with a 3.

Your stomach dropped. Wrong floor.

Panicked, you took off toward the stairs, moving too fast to notice the person coming from the opposite direction.

On your way to the second floor, you bump into someone, causing you to tumble down a few steps.

You look up to see no other than the Han Taesan. Your butt hurt from the fall, but you didn’t have any time to think about the pain.

“I'm sorry I didn't see you.”

"You’re not even going to say sorry?" you muttered, brushing off your pants. Then, narrowing your eyes, you added,

Taesan barely blinked. “You ran into me.”

Your jaw dropped slightly, but before you could argue, he stepped past you without a second thought.

“Try the next floor up,” he said flatly as he disappeared down the hall.

You exhaled sharply, watching his retreating figure in disbelief.

Unbelievable.

It’s when you’re on your way to the campus cafe after class, your mind wandering when you hear footsteps behind you.

You quicken your pace, trying to get to the door of the cafe. You reach the door of the cafe, hand on the handle, and then it happens. He steps up right behind you, closer than you expected.

You pull the door open, and as you do, it almost hits him. His gaze flickers to you for only a second, barely acknowledging you, before he steps past, his shoulder brushing yours like you’re nothing more than an obstacle in his way.

You blink. Then scoff under your breath.

Maybe it’s the way he doesn’t even bother to say “excuse me,” or the way he acts like you don’t exist, but something inside you deflates.

For a second, you wonder why you even liked him in the first place. The person standing in front of you feels so different from the one you once admired from afar.

You watch as he takes his drink and turns to leave without so much as a glance in your direction.

And that’s when it really sinks in.

You let out a slow breath, the weight of disappointment settling in your chest as you turn toward the counter.

Why am I even trying?

Maybe it’s time to stop. To stop chasing after someone who never cared in the first place.

The thought of Taesan was already floating away and out of your head. You hadn't bumped into him anymore after that day and the seasons had changed. It wasn't winter yet, but it might as well be. It was freezing outside, a thin layer of ice forming on the school fountain.

It’s late in the evening, and you’re walking on campus, juggling a pile of books in your arms as you head toward the library. You had received an email reminding you that five books you had lent from the library needed to be returned today.

You should've read your mail earlier, because by the time you had actually read the email it was already 9:30 pm, 30 minutes before the library closing time.

Why were there no online copies of these books? you complain with a sigh, readjusting the books in your arms. The thick biology textbooks were heavy and completely blocked your view.

You don’t notice the small puddle that had turned into ice on the ground. You slip, your foot sliding out from under you, and before you can catch yourself, you crash to the floor, the sound of your books hitting the ground echoing.

You wince in pain as you try to sit up, your ankle throbbing immediately from the impact.. You glance around a little embarrassed, hoping no one saw.

Just as you're about to sigh of relief, because no one seems to be around you, your eye catches sight of Taesan. He is standing just a few feet away, walking towards you with his cold look and unreadable expression.

Why is he walking over?

Quickly composing yourself you try to look around for the books you had just dropped. But before you can stand up, Taesan is standing next to you.

His eyes flicker over you, lingering on your ankle. His usual impassive gaze shifts, his jaw tightens for a fraction of a second before he exhales quietly. Is he worried?

"You alright?" His voice is low, and despite his usual cold tone, there's an underlying concern.

You laugh nervously, "This is so embarrassing." you mutter to yourself, as you pick up the book closest to you.

He raises an eyebrow, taken aback by the fact that you're not replying to him like he had expected.

His gaze flicks down to your ankle and then back up to your face, his posture still stiff, but there's something almost protective in the way he's looking at you now.

Without waiting for your response, he crouches down, carefully taking your ankle in his hands. It’s an unexpected move, and you’re caught off guard by how gentle he is.

His hands are cold, but his touch is surprisingly tender as he examines your foot, testing for any obvious swelling or injury.

His hand extends, fingers curling slightly as if debating whether to offer or simply act. You hesitate before grasping it, his grip is steady, warm despite the cold air.

His brow furrows slightly as he ensures you're stable on your feet, his gaze flicking down to your ankle with a quiet, assessing look.

"Careful," he says, his voice soft but commanding, as if it’s an order rather than a suggestion. For a second, his touch lingers just a bit longer than necessary.

"You shouldn’t walk on it," he mutters, his voice flat but with a hint of care that makes your heart skip a beat. "It could get worse."

You open your mouth to say something, but he’s already reaching for your books, picking them up with ease. He doesn’t look at you as he hands them back.

“Come on,” he says, standing up and glancing down at you again. “I’ll walk you to the nurse’s office.”

"No need," you tell him, finally opening your mouth. "I need to return these books today or I'll be fined."

You attempt to step forward, putting weight on your injured ankle, but the sharp pain shoots up your leg, and you immediately wince, slightly stumbling.

You bite your lip to keep from making a sound, determined not to show how much it hurts. But before you can take another step, Taesan is already there, his hand holding your arm to steady you.

His gaze flicks down to your ankle once again, his brow furrowing slightly. “You’re not walking on it like that,” he says, his tone more forceful than before.

Something in you twinges, Taesan, who has been nothing but cold to you is now suddenly trying to help you?

Without another word, he takes the books from you. Then, to your surprise, he steps a little closer, his shoulder coming up next to yours. “I’ll take you,” he says.

"Look I don't know what you're trying to do, but I can get it checked out later. I'm telling you these books have to be returned within—" you glance at your phone, panic creeping into your voice as the time flickers at 9:50 p.m. "—10 minutes."

Without another word, he takes the books from your arms. Then, to your surprise, he steps a little closer, his shoulder brushing lightly against yours as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

“I’ll take you,” he says in that calm way of his. “You won’t make it on your own, I’ll get you there in less time.”

You hesitate, eyeing him, unsure how to react to his quiet confidence. You’ve always known him to be the cold, logical type, the one who keeps to himself, hardly ever showing emotion. So why now? Why would he offer this help when it’s so unlike him?

"How are you going to take me?

Your eyes meet his, and for a split second, you feel the tension between the two of you tighten. There’s a brief pause, and you swear you see a flicker of something in his gaze. Is it surprise? Or amusement?

"Any way I have to," he says. “Even if it means carrying you.”

You blink, caught off guard by his words. Taesan is talking about carrying you? You try to process it, your mind racing, but all you manage to do is stare at him, trying to figure out if he’s serious or if it’s just another one of his sarcastic remarks.

He looks like he’s already made up his mind about this. "You can’t walk on that. It’ll get worse," he states flatly, as if it's simple logic. "And you don’t have time to waste. Let me do this."

You take a deep breath, feeling the rush of emotions that had built up inside you. The blood is rushing to your cheeks at the thought of Taesan carrying you.

He’s not the same person you thought he was, and for some reason, that realization leaves you speechless.

“Alright,” you say quietly, finally letting go of the last thread of resistance. You look up at him, offering a small, unsure smile. “If you really think I can’t make it.”

His eyes soften just a touch, though his expression is still as unreadable as ever. He doesn’t smirk or say anything else, just nods once, his movements smooth as he steps a little closer, ready to help.

“Hold on,” he murmurs, and for the first time, there’s something faintly warm in his voice, as though he’s trying to reassure you, though he says nothing more. He puts down the books on the ground, and crouches in front of you.

You hesitate for only a second before you allow him to carefully lift you, his arms steady around you. He is surprisingly gentle, his grip firm but never forceful.

Your heart races, but you’re not sure if it’s because of the way he’s holding you, or because for the first time, you’re realizing that Taesan might be showing you a side of him you never thought possible.

Taesan carries you towards a nearby bench, carefully letting you down before walking back to pick up the books.

"I'll return these for you." He says, somehow the stack of books look lighter in his arms. "Give me your student ID."

You reach into your pocket, pulling out your wallet. Luckily you had taken a good photo for the ID card.

You hand him your student ID without a word, but as you do, you catch yourself watching him more closely than usual.

As Taesan walks over to return your books, his mind is racing with questions. The task itself is simple, return the books, make sure everything’s done quickly. But even as he holds the stack of books in his arms with his usual calm, his thoughts keep drifting back to you.

The way he’d carried you, his concern, it's different from how he usually thinks and acts. It feels strange.

He’s never been one to let his emotions get involved, especially when it comes to others. But something about the way he couldn’t just leave you there, struggling on your own, is bothering him more than it should.

He picks up your student ID, barely glancing at it. Until he does. His gaze hesitates, lingering longer than it should. His fingers tighten ever so slightly around the card before he exhales, expression unreadable once more.

Why was he so insistent about helping you? Why does it bother him that you’re hurt? He knows it shouldn’t.

It’s just an injury, he thinks. And yet, when he saw you struggling, when he saw you hesitating, he couldn't help but care.

He sets the books down with more force than necessary, the librarian looking at him with confusion. He tells himself it’s nothing, that he’s just overthinking. It’s just books. Just an inconvenience.

As he walks back to you, the feeling lingers, like a quiet hum in the back of his mind. He’s never been the type to get involved like this, to feel the need to make sure someone is okay.

As he nears you, Taesan realizes he’s worried. And he doesn’t know why.

He’s not sure why, not sure what it means, but for the first time in a long while, he doesn’t have all the answers. And that, more than anything, makes him uneasy.

Your ankle healed quickly, and two days later you’re still thinking about that night. You try to focus on the lesson, but your mind keeps drifting back. After everything he’d done for you, after helping you with your books, the care he showed. Why was he so confusing?

One moment he’s cold and distant, not even apologising to you when the two of you bumped against each other. And now he’s suddenly carrying you on his back, returning your books for you?

How can you feel this way about someone who’s been so cold to you? You groan, sinking lower into your seat, your hands tangled in your hair. The soft murmur of your classmates fades into the background as you try to push the thoughts aside.

Taesan enters the classroom like a shadow. He takes a seat in front of you, tossing his bag into the seat beside him without a second thought. He doesn’t bother to look around, just pulls his head down onto the desk with a soft, exhausted sigh.

You’ve never seen him like this before, and you can’t decide whether it makes you feel worse for him or more confused about everything that’s happened between you two.

You hate how much you’re thinking about him, how his presence so easily takes over your mind. You wonder if he’s still thinking about last night, if he’s wishing he hadn’t stepped in. And the thought stabs at you, suddenly leaving you feeling guilty, and even more tangled up inside.

He hasn’t even glanced at you. But for some reason, that distance feels even more confusing than the moments when he’s so close.

After the lecture the lecture hall is slowly emptying out, and you're packing your things into your bag, preparing to leave.

Leehan, a marine sciences student, walks over to him with a grin on his face.

"Taesan!" Leehan calls out, and Taesan looks up, just slightly, his eyes flicking toward his friend.

"Jaehyun is hosting a party this weekend," Leehan continues, "You wanna come? You’ve been buried in your books for ages, man. It’s about time you took a break."

Taesan doesn’t immediately respond, glancing briefly at Leehan before his eyes drift toward the door. For a moment, it looks like he’s debating the offer in his mind.

"Come on, a little chaos won’t kill you," Leehan nudges him with a teasing push. "Besides, we both know Jaehyun’s gonna keep asking until you say yes. Might as well save yourself the trouble."

Taesan's gaze shifts away again, his expression remaining as unreadable as always. He seems distracted, almost lost in thought. His shoulders shift slightly, but there’s no real indication of whether he’s interested or not.

Leehan, noticing his friend's hesitation, adds with a grin, "Just show up for an hour. No one’s expecting you to dance on tables. Just exist in the same space as other humans for once."

Taesan remains silent for a moment longer, looking at Leehan, then back down at his bag. Finally, he responds in his usual calm, detached way, "I’ll think about it."

Leehan laughs, shaking his head. "Mhm, sure. But if you don’t show up, Jaehyun will drag you there himself and you know he won’t shut up about it the whole night."

Later that evening, you’re sitting on your bed, flipping through some notes when Rei, your roommate, bursts through the door with a wide grin plastered on her face.

“Guess what?” she says, practically bouncing with excitement. “Jaehyun’s hosting a party this weekend. You should come with me!”

You glance up at her.“A party? I don’t know,I’ve got so much stuff to catch up on.”

Rei flops down on the bed next to you, her eyes sparkling. “Come on, you’ve been studying nonstop. You need to unwind! It’s going to be fun, I promise. I’ll make sure you’re not stuck in some corner by yourself. You’ll have a good time.”

You feel a tug of hesitation, Rei’s always so convincing. Plus, you know she’ll be there, and she’s great at pulling you into her whirlwind of energy.

"I don’t know, Rei” you trail off, glancing at the pile of work on your desk. "I could use the time to catch up on some stuff."

Rei shakes her head, already knowing where this is going. “You always say that, but you never actually get any work done when you stay in. Trust me, you’ll feel way better after letting loose for just one night.”

You roll your eyes, but there’s a small smile on your face. “Fine, fine. I’ll go. But you’re not leaving me to get lost in the crowd alone."

“It’s not just me, Liz and Mayu are going too.” She laughs when she sees your eyes light up. The four of you haven’t met up in a while, and the thought of reuniting makes you happy already.

Rei gets up, already heading to her side of the room to change, humming to herself. You can’t help but laugh at her excitement, feeling a little bit of your own reluctance fade away.

The weekend rolls around, and despite your hesitation, you find yourself standing outside Jaehyun’s apartment with Rei, Liz, and Mayu.

"I swear, I haven’t seen Jaehyun throw a party like this in months," Liz says, her eyes wide as she takes in the scene. The bass from the music vibrates the ground beneath your feet.

“I haven't been to a party like this in ages." You chuckle, adjusting the small shoulder bag.

Mayu laughs, looping her arm through yours as she leads you toward the door. "Exactly! And you haven’t had any fun in ages either."

The four of you chuckle, walking through the door of Jaehyun’s house. You step inside, immediately hit by the heavy thrum of music and the overwhelming scent of alcohol and perfume.

The living room is packed, people are dancing, talking, and laughing, and the air is thick with energy. Rei takes the time to greet a few of her friends.

“Sungho!” Rei exclaims, waving in his direction. You and Mayu exchange confused glances but Liz is quick to fill the two of you in.

“New friend she made,” She whispers to the two of you. You nod, trying to make sense of the new information. Sungho looks like he’s part of the crowd, laughing and chatting easily with everyone, while Rei joins him with a wide grin on her face. You watch them for a second before turning your attention back to the rest of the party.

The room is alive with chatter, flashing lights, and the steady thrum of bass. You can feel the familiar knot of discomfort form in your stomach. You’ve never been the party type, but you promised Rei you’d at least try.

“Come on,” Mayu says, nudging you gently. “Let’s get some drinks, and maybe find a spot to relax. No need to dive straight into the chaos.”

You smile gratefully, following her as she guides you through the crowded room. You can see a long line of people near the bar, everyone laughing and shouting to be heard over the music. You figure you’ll grab something light, maybe just a drink to ease the tension in your shoulders.

Suddenly, your eyes catch something familiar.

Standing near the far end of the living room, Taesan stands off to the side, more noticeable in this environment. He’s wearing a dark jacket over his usual casual clothes, and his expression is unreadable as he observes the crowd.

Your heart stutters slightly, remembering once again, that time he helped you with your books. He doesn’t notice you staring, or if he does, he gives no indication of it. His attention is on a conversation between Jaehyun and Woonhak, though he’s clearly not involved in their loud conversation.

"Here you go," Mayu interrupts your thoughts, handing you a drink. You take it with a polite nod, still glancing in Taesan’s direction.

Mayu follows your gaze and raises an eyebrow. “You know him?” she asks, her voice low enough that it’s mostly drowned out by the music.

You blink and quickly turn your attention back to her. “Sort of. We’re in a couple of the same classes. He helped me with something once.” You don’t go into detail about the books, though a part of you wonders why you feel the need to downplay it.

Mayu smirks knowingly, her eyes darting back to Taesan. “Interesting. He doesn’t seem like the party type.”

You can’t help but agree with that. Taesan looks out of place here, You wonder why he even bothered coming. Maybe Jaehyun convinced him, like Rei did to you.

The moment stretches on as you continue to observe him, torn between curiosity and discomfort. Finally, Mayu nudges you. "You gonna go say hi?"

The question is a little too direct, and you feel your cheeks warm, even though you can’t really explain why. You don’t know if it’s the party atmosphere or the fact that Taesan is so different from everyone else here, but you suddenly feel a little nervous.

"I don’t know," you mumble, taking a sip of your drink, scrunching your face at the taste. "What did you put in this?"

“Is it that bad?" She replies, taking a sip as well. “Ooh, it’s got a little kick to it. Don’t worry, maybe it’s a good idea to get drunk considering your hesitation to go up to him.”

You roll your eyes, but there’s a small smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. Mayu’s right, though. It would be weird to just leave it hanging.

You take another glance at Taesan, and this time, your eyes meet. There’s a brief moment of recognition between the two of you, but then he immediately looks away, back to his drink.

The night starts to blur together, the music pulses through the floor, the lights flash, and before you know it, you’re on your third drink, not realizing you might have had one too many.

Your head feels light, your thoughts a little foggy, and your body is just warm enough to make you feel oddly detached from the world around you. It’s not that you’re drunk, just tipsy.

You glance over toward Taesan, and for some reason, your heart picks up pace. There’s something about the way he’s standing there that makes you want to talk to him, but something keeps holding you back.

Rei and Liz are laughing about something near the punch bowl, and Mayu is already halfway through a conversation with some guy you don’t recognize.

You stand there for a moment, the noise of the party swirling around you, but all you can focus on is the distance between you and Taesan. Your heart thumps louder in your chest with each passing second, and it’s becoming harder to ignore the pull to go up to him.

You take another sip of your drink, the alcohol only making you feel lighter, more detached from the moment.

For some reason, your body won’t move, though. It’s like there’s an invisible wall between you and Taesan, one you can’t quite get past. You try to convince yourself it’s because the party's just too chaotic, too loud for any real conversation, but deep down, you know it’s more than that.

You steal another glance at him. He’s still standing there, drink in hand, his gaze flicking across the room but never settling on anything or anyone.

Just as you're about to look away and find another distraction, you catch his eyes again. This time, it’s longer. You can’t tell if it’s intentional or if it’s just a coincidence, but there’s a subtle change in his expression when he meets your gaze.

It’s enough to make your heart skip a beat. For a brief second, you’re aware of how close he is, in a way that feels strange.

"Go on, say something,” you tell yourself, but your feet feel like they’re glued to the floor.

You take another sip of your drink, but it’s barely registering on your tongue anymore. The thoughts are starting to swirl in your head, and you’re not sure whether the alcohol is making it worse or if you’re just being you.

“You should talk to him,” Mayu’s voice suddenly breaks through the fog, pulling you out of your thoughts.

You blink, and Mayu’s standing next to you now, an amused smile on her face. She must’ve noticed you staring at Taesan.

“I- what?” You stammer, a little flustered, your cheeks burning despite the alcohol running through your system. You turn your head quickly, trying to mask the sudden rush of nerves.

“Come on, I see the way you’re looking at him. Go talk to him,” she teases, nudging you playfully.

“I don’t know. He looks busy.” You try to shrug it off, but the words feel weak in your mouth.

Mayu raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “You’re drunk, huh?” she asks, sounding amused but concerned at the same time.

“I’m fine,” you quickly reply, though your voice wavers slightly.

Mayu doesn’t look convinced, but she gives you a reassuring smile. “Okay, well, if you don’t go, I’m going to make you,” she says, her tone teasing. “You never know until you try.”

With a quick shake of your head, you tell Mayu, “Okay, okay, I’ll go talk to him.” You don’t know if it’s the alcohol talking, but you’re suddenly moving with confidence.

Mayu smiles brightly as you start making your way toward Taesan. You can feel your heart racing as you push through the crowd, trying to keep your composure.

As you get closer, you can feel the thrum of the music in your chest, the chaos of the party fading away a little. And then you’re standing right in front of him, your breath catching a little as you finally find yourself face-to-face with him.

“Hey,” you say a little too quickly, the word tumbling out before you can stop it. You’re suddenly very aware of how loud the music is, how everyone else around you seems to be talking and laughing, leaving you standing here in the middle of it all, heart thudding in your chest.

"Hey," he says simply, his voice calm, not as stiff as usual, but still carrying that quiet tone. He doesn’t look surprised to see you, but you can tell he's taken a moment to adjust to you being here, standing in front of him,

You open your mouth, unsure of what to say next. It’s a little embarrassing that you’ve come this far and now you’re not sure what the hell to do with yourself.

“Uh, it’s loud in here,” you say, realizing how ridiculous it sounds the moment the words leave your mouth.

Taesan looks around the room for a moment, as though weighing your observation. “Yeah,” he replies, his voice low.

You take another sip of your drink, trying to play it cool, but the alcohol’s already got your head feeling a little too light.

You can tell by the way his gaze lingers on you that he's picking up on something. His eyes shift slightly, scanning you in a way that's more thoughtful than usual.

"You okay?" he asks, his tone softer now. "You look a little off."

You blink, not realizing that your body has started to sway ever so slightly, the edges of your vision blurring just a little. It’s not like you’re completely drunk, but the alcohol’s definitely made everything feel hazy, and you're suddenly very aware that maybe you’ve overdone it with the drinks.

“I’m fine,” you say quickly, but even to your own ears, your voice sounds a little slurred. You smile awkwardly, hoping it doesn’t come off as obvious.

Taesan raises an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "You sure?" He glances at your drink, and then back to you.

You nod, too eager to prove you're not completely tipsy. "Yeah, yeah, just a little tipsy." You let out a half-hearted laugh, but it doesn’t sound as confident as you hoped.

He seems to be studying you now, his expression unreadable. There's a quiet tension in the air, and for a second, you wonder if you’ve said something wrong, if you’ve ruined the moment before it even had a chance to start.

Taesan shifts a little, adjusting his grip on his drink, but doesn't say anything right away.

“Want me to get you some water?”

The offer is unexpected, and you blink at him for a moment, feeling a wave of warmth that has nothing to do with the alcohol. You hadn’t expected him to notice, much less offer to help. It’s the kind of thing you would never have expected from someone like him.

“Yeah, maybe” You laugh a little, feeling like an idiot now. “Thanks.”

He nods once, then turns away. You can’t help but watch him for a second longer. When he returns with the water, he hands it to you wordlessly.

You take it gratefully, immediately sipping it to try and clear some of the fog in your head. As you drink, you notice him watching you, his expression still as unreadable as always.

"Better?" he asks, his voice quieter now.

You nod, feeling the cool liquid help clear your head just a little. "Yeah, thanks," you murmur, suddenly feeling a little more grounded.

There’s a brief moment of silence between you two, the loud music and chatter of the party filling the space around you. You shift your weight from one foot to the other, unsure of how to continue the conversation now.

You’re not sure what to say next, but for the first time tonight, it feels okay to just be here with him, even in the chaos of the party.

"Thanks," you say again, looking up at him. "I didn’t think you’d care."

Taesan looks at you. “I don’t like seeing people uncomfortable,” he says, indifferent.

You swallow, thinking back to that night again. Was it all just kindness? Had you taken his kindness as a sign that he was interested?

"You don’t seem like the type to care," you mutter under your breath, the words slipping out before you can stop them.

You blink, suddenly realizing the weight of what you just said, your cheeks flushing as you try to clarify what you mean. “I just mean, you don’t seem like the type to care.”

"It's alright," he says quietly. "But it's kind of interesting how you think you know me."

Your cheeks flush even more, a wave of warmth creeping up from your neck to your face as you try to recover from the awkwardness.

You let out a nervous laugh, “I didn’t mean it like that,” you repeat, "You just seem like the type who doesn’t really get involved, you know?"

Taesan tilts his head slightly, considering you, his eyes never leaving your face. He takes another slow sip of his drink, clearly unbothered by your awkwardness.

"Maybe I’m not," he replies, "Maybe I am."

"You don't have to," you mumble. The alcohol, the proximity to him, and the faint warmth in the air all mix together to make you feel light-headed.

Finally, he lets out a quiet exhale and shifts slightly, lowering his voice. "I guess it depends on whether I want to or not."

Your heart skips a beat, his words hanging in the air, leaving you to wonder if you’ve misread everything. Is he toying with you?

You take a small step back, the warmth of the alcohol in your veins making everything feel a little more intense than usual. But then doubt creeps in, maybe you’ve been overthinking this.

Maybe he was just kind to you that night, when he helped you with the books, because that’s what he does. He’s not interested, he’s just being Taesan.

You blink, trying to shake off the feeling, but the more you think about it, the more unsure you become. You had hoped for something more, but maybe that was just wishful thinking.

"Maybe I’m just imagining things," you think to yourself, the self-doubt sinking in. You’re tipsy, and your thoughts feel muddled. You don’t even know why you’re standing here, talking to him, trying to figure out something that probably isn’t there in the first place.

Taesan seems to notice the shift in your demeanor, but he doesn’t say anything. His eyes stay fixed on you, his posture still relaxed as if nothing’s changed.

You open your mouth to say something, to smooth over the awkwardness, but the words die in your throat. What could you even say?

You let out a breath and try to shake off the uncertainty, turning back to the noise and laughter around you.

You open your mouth, but before you can say anything else, Rei appears next to you, snapping you out of the moment.

“Hey! Are you guys having fun over here?” She grins at the two of you, clearly not picking up on the subtle tension in the air.

You glance at Taesan, unsure whether you should continue this conversation or just let it go.

“Yeah, we are done talking.” you say, as if nothing had happened between the two of you just now. Though inside, you're stung by the harsh realization that Taesan’s help was just a kind gesture, not a sign of anything more, and you can’t help but feel a little foolish for thinking otherwise.

“Well, if you’re done with your little chat, there’s a whole crowd of people waiting to dance. Come on!” Rei grins, linking arms with you. “It was nice meeting you, uhm”

“Taesan.”

“It was nice meeting you, Taesan!” Rei says, before pulling you away toward the dance floor, her energy as infectious as ever.

You don’t dare to glance back at Taesan, trying to forget about him all together. You shouldn’t have been foolish to think he was interested in the first place.

The rest of the night is a blur, and by the time you’re heading home with Rei, your head’s still spinning from the alcohol, the music, and the confusing conversation you had with Taesan.

You lie in bed later, staring at the ceiling, trying to make sense of it all. But no answers come, only more questions.

You roll over onto your side, pulling the covers tighter around you, but it does little to ease the unease swirling inside you. The night keeps replaying in your mind, the way Taesan looked at you, his words, the strange shift in the air between you two.

You had convinced yourself, before, that it was something more, but now it’s clear that it was nothing more than his usual detached kindness.

You sigh, frustrated with yourself. You shouldn’t have expected anything different from him. He’s always been distant, so why would tonight be any different?

You close your eyes, but the moment when your eyes met his flashes back in your mind. A brief flicker of something, but was it real? Or were you just reading too much into it?

Your heart aches, but you push the thought away. You can’t keep dwelling on this. He doesn’t care about you like that, and you shouldn’t have let yourself hope.

As Taesan sits on his bed later that night, the dim light of his desk lamp casting long shadows across the room, his thoughts keep drifting back to the brief conversation you had at the party.

He hadn’t meant to make things awkward. But then you’d suddenly shut down, brushing him off with that casual dismissal.

He hadn’t been prepared for that.

His fingers grip the edge of his notebook, frowning as he recalls the way you’d pulled away so quickly, the way you’d told Rei the conversation had ended when it hadn’t.

Did he say something wrong? Did he come off the wrong way? The thought that maybe he’d hurt you lingers in the back of his mind. He couldn’t figure out why it bothered him, but it did.

Why did it matter so much? He wasn’t the type to dwell on things like this. But here he was, unable to shake the feeling that he might have said something that made you uncomfortable.

A few weeks pass, and the rhythm of campus life carries on. You and Taesan don’t cross paths much. The occasional glance during class or passing by in the hallways, but nothing beyond that.

You focus on your studies, drown yourself in textbooks, and try not to overthink things. Rei, Liz, and Mayu keep you distracted, as they always do, but there’s still a quiet part of you that wonders what would’ve happened if you hadn’t pulled away from Taesan that night.

What if things had been different?

It’s late one afternoon when you run into him again. You’re walking through the library, buried in your phone, trying to find a quiet corner to study, when you bump into him. The collision is soft but unexpected, and you almost drop your phone.

“Sorry,” you mutter, not looking up. Only when the figure you bumped into doesn’t reply do you look up. It’s Han Taesan, but this time his eyes are wide with surprise, as though he hadn’t expected to see you at all.

You freeze for a second, unsure of how to react. Should you just walk away? Pretend like nothing happened between you two?

To your surprise, Taesan speaks first, his voice quieter than usual, as if he’s uncertain of what to say. “It’s fine,” he says, glancing down at your phone before meeting your eyes again. “I didn’t think I’d run into you here.”

You swallow, feeling the tension in the air. “Yeah,” you say nervously. “I was just looking for a place to study.”

He nods, glancing around briefly. The silence stretches between you two, and for a moment, it feels like both of you are unsure of where to go next.

You want to ask him how he’s been, or maybe apologize for being so cold that night, but the words seem stuck in your throat. What if he doesn’t want to talk to you at all?

But before you can say anything, Taesan surprises you by taking a small step closer, his gaze lingering on you a little longer than usual.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he says, the words coming out softer than you expected.

Your heart skips a beat at the mention of avoiding. It feels like the air around you has gotten thicker, heavier.

“I didn’t mean to,” you reply, your voice quieter now. “I just didn’t think you wanted to talk after that night.”

Taesan’s brow furrows slightly, and he shifts uncomfortably, looking as though he’s trying to figure out how to respond.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel like that. I just didn’t know how to react when you walked away with Rei so suddenly.”

“I was just confused,” he continues, looking at you more directly now. “I thought maybe I had done something wrong.”

You hadn’t meant for it to come across that way. You let out a shaky breath, then manage a small, honest smile. “I’m sorry,” you say quietly. “I just, I guess I assumed you weren’t interested, so I backed off.”

For a moment, neither of you speak. Then Taesan looks at you, his expression unreadable but not distant. The corners of his mouth tug up just slightly. "I guess we're both bad at this, huh?"

"Bad at what?"

"Bad at whatever this is," Taesan says with a small shrug, his eyes flicking over you. "Talking, not sure what to call it."

Taesan shifts slightly, taking a step closer, but not enough to invade your personal space. "I don't know what I was expecting after the party," he continues. "Maybe I thought it would just be normal. But then you pulled away, and I didn't know what to think."

You nod, "I didn’t know what to think either. You were being nice, but I thought maybe you were just being kind, you know? I didn’t want to read too much into it."

You play with the string of your hoodie, slightly tugging at it. All the disappointment and feelings you’ve been trying to avoid come rushing back again now that you’re standing in front of him.

“Were you just being kind when you helped me with my books? Would you have done the same if it were anyone else who slipped that day?”

The question hangs in the air, and you can feel your pulse quicken. Taesan’s eyes flick over to you, there’s a slight tightness in his jaw, like he's trying to process something that doesn’t come easily to him.

"I didn’t think about it at the time but now, I don’t know. He exhales sharply, looking away. "Maybe I just wanted to."

You swallow, frustration tightening your chest. This wasn’t how you imagined this conversation would go. You thought maybe, just maybe, there was more to it, more to him.

But now? Now you don’t know how much more of this confusion you can take. You take a step closer, the two of you being only a few inches away from each other.

"Then why?" Your voice wavers slightly. "Why did you help me at all? Why act like you care?"

“Why help me when you’ve been nothing but cold to me before? When I spilled my drink on you or when we bumped into each other on the stairs on the first day of school?”

As the words slip out, you feel the rush of heat flood your face, a mixture of anger, embarrassment, and something else, something that makes your stomach churn.

Taesan doesn’t move, but his gaze shifts downward, like he’s avoiding your eyes. His lips part, like he’s going to say something, but he stops himself.

"I—" He starts, but he doesn’t know what to say, his heartbeat thumping in his throat. The lack of explanation hangs in the air, and you can see it now, he doesn’t know why he’s been acting this way.

Hell, you don’t know why you’ve been acting this way. You can feel the frustration bubbling inside you now, mixing with that strange, painful feeling that you don’t know how to name.

The way he’s been helping you, acting like he cares, like there’s something more to it, but then he tells you he doesn’t like seeing people uncomfortable? It feels cruel.

“If you don’t know,” you say, your voice more stern than before, “then stop helping me. Stop looking out for me. It’s unfair.”

The air feels thicker now. There’s a brief silence that makes your throat feel tight. Taesan looks at you. His lips twitch like he wants to say something, anything, but he doesn’t.

Instead, he looks at you, his gaze lingering longer than usual, and for a split second, you wonder if he even understands what you’re really saying, if he feels the same frustration, the same confusion that you do.

But just as quickly as that thought enters your mind, it fades away, swallowed by the silence. The words don’t come from him. And that’s enough of an answer, isn’t it?

You nod slowly, feeling a mix of disappointment and sadness settle in your chest. “Okay. Fine,” you murmur, more to yourself than to him.

You take a step back, not wanting to stay any longer. You didn’t expect an answer from him anyway, but the lack of one hurts more than you thought it would.

Taesan stands frozen in place, watching as you turn and walk away from him. He doesn’t know what just happened. Why couldn’t he explain himself? Why did everything seem to come out so wrong?

He’s never been good with words, but this was different. It’s not just that he couldn’t say his thoughts. It's like something inside him was stopping him from saying what he really wanted to say.

Then, he catches a glimpse of your hand moving to your face, wiping at your eyes. His breath hitches in his throat. Are you crying?

His mind races, but his body stays rooted to the spot. He watches, almost helplessly, as you walk further away, your back to him now.

He feels like he got punched in the gut, realizing that he might have hurt you, even though he never meant to. He never thought you’d react like this. Did he really make you cry?

The thought of you being upset, especially because of him, gnaws at him. He feels that familiar sense of discomfort that always seems to follow when it comes to emotions, but this time, it’s more urgent, more real.

What’s wrong with me? Taesan thinks, his chest tightening. He wonders why he couldn’t simply tell you what was on his mind, why he couldn’t explain himself the way he should have.

For a long moment, Taesan stays where he is, standing motionless. All he can focus on is the sight of you walking away. His heart clenches with a mixture of regret and something else.

He should follow you. He should stop you, say something, apologize, explain everything. His fingers twitch at his side, an impulse to reach out, to stop you. But his feet stay rooted, and before he knows it, you’re already gone.

A few days after your encounter with Taesan, you sit at a corner table in a cozy café, holding a half-finished cup of coffee while your friends, Mayu, Liz, and Rei, sit across from you, chatting amongst themselves.

The air inside the café is warm and inviting, but your mind feels anything but.

Rei is the first to speak, breaking the silence that has settled over the table. "So, are you going to tell us what happened?" she asks, her tone teasing but laced with concern.

“I thought he liked me." Your voice fades, the words hanging in the air. Your thoughts are still jumbled, and every time you try to make sense of them, it only gets worse.

Rei leans in, her usual playful attitude slipping for a moment. “What happened? You guys have been talking a lot lately. I thought everything was fine?”

“Yeah, well, I thought so too,” you say, bitterness creeping into your voice. “But then he just couldn’t explain himself. He couldn’t even reply to me.”

Mayu stirs her drink absentmindedly, while Liz presses her lips together before speaking. “Do you think he realized he made you feel that way? Maybe he didn’t mean to hurt you.”

You shake your head. “I don’t know. He just shut down. It felt like he didn’t care at all. And now, I don’t know what to think. Maybe I read too much into everything.”

Rei exhales, shaking her head slightly. “You’re really overthinking this. Maybe Taesan’s just as confused as you are. He’s not exactly the most straightforward guy.”

“But that’s just it,” you say, your voice rising slightly. "If he cared, why did he stay silent? Why let me walk away without even trying?"

The table grows quiet, and even Rei, who usually finds humor in everything, sits back in her chair, her expression serious.

Mayu finally speaks up. “Maybe he’s not used to being vulnerable. Maybe he doesn’t know how to handle it either.”

Liz nods. “Yeah, I’ve noticed he can be closed off. Maybe he didn’t know how to fix things.”

You frown, not sure whether to believe it. “I don’t know. I can’t keep trying to figure him out when it feels like he’s not even trying to figure me out.”

Mayu’s eyes soften as she reaches over to place a hand on yours. “Hey, we’re not saying you’re wrong. You have every right to feel hurt. But sometimes, people don’t know how to handle their own emotions. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, it just means they’re lost too.”

Rei raises an eyebrow. “So, you’re saying we should give him the benefit of the doubt? You think he wants to make things right?”

“I don’t know,” you say, your voice quiet. “But it’s not like he’s trying to reach out to me. I don’t want to sit here like an idiot waiting for him to approach me.”

A long pause follows as everyone absorbs what you’ve said. Liz shifts in her seat, her fingers tapping gently on her cup. “You don’t have to wait for him. If you want to talk to him, go ahead. But don’t make it all about him making things right. You deserve someone who’s willing to put in the effort too.”

Rei nods vigorously. “Yeah. And if he’s too dumb to realize what he’s got, then we’ll find you someone better.”

“Yeah,” Mayu chimes in, “We all know Rei has got the best connections, right, Rei?”

“Of course! Ask me anytime!” The four of you burst out into laughter, easing your mind a little of all the thoughts about Taesan.

You're running late, so so late, for a study session.

As you walk through the crowded campus, your phone buzzes in your pocket, and you pull it out to check the message. It's from Mayu, reminding you of the study group you’ve agreed to attend.

where r u?

i’m omw you quickly text back before hastily stuffing your phone back into your pocket.

You weave through the crowd of students, rushing toward the building where the study group is supposed to meet.

As you enter the classroom, you're hit with the familiar sight: your friends have already gathered around, scattered across a table, but your eyes immediately find him. Taesan.

He’s sitting at the far end of the table, his usual neutral expression on his face as he flips through a notebook, completely absorbed in his work. You hesitate for just a moment, unsure of how to approach the situation, but quickly shake off the nerves. It’s not like you haven’t run into him before.

You hadn’t exactly expected to see him in the study group. Sure, he was in some of your classes, but you figured he’d be the type to stay away from these group study sessions.

Mayu spots you as soon as you walk in and gives you a little wave. You slide into the seat next to her, trying your best to act natural, though you can’t help but feel his presence like a weight at the other end of the table.

"You didn’t tell me Taesan was going to be here," she whispers with a raised eyebrow, her voice barely audible.

You sigh, already feeling the weight of the situation. “Yeah, well, neither did I. I had no idea he’d be here either.” You glance over at Taesan, who’s quietly working through a set of notes, the soft rustling of paper the only sound between the two of you.

Out of the corner of your eye, you catch Taesan’s gaze again. This time, he’s not looking away so quickly. His eyes linger, just for a moment longer.

You try to ignore it, but it’s hard when you can practically feel the tension from across the table. Mayu, sensing the shift in the air, glances over at him too and lets out a small, almost dismissive sigh. “You know, if he really wanted to talk, he’d say something. You’re not the one who needs to make the first move."

You let out a long breath, running a hand through your hair again. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, he’s the one who-"

But before you can finish, you catch sight of Taesan making a quick adjustment in his seat. His fingers briefly brush the edge of his notebook, and he opens his mouth like he’s about to say something.

You freeze, eyes on him, but then nothing happens. He simply closes his mouth, clears his throat quietly, and goes back to flipping through his notes, looking like he’s just as uncomfortable as you feel.

Mayu shoots you a small look. "See? It’s fine. Just focus on the work."

The study group eventually wraps up, and everyone begins to gather their things. You try to keep to yourself, making a quick exit. Immediately as you walk out the door, you’re surprised by Taesan pulling you away from the rest.

“What are you doing? I’m walking back with Mayu.” You hiss at him, annoyed at how he had suddenly pulled you away like this.

Taesan doesn’t let go of your arm immediately, his grip surprisingly firm but not tight enough to hurt. He looks down at you and back toward the study room, where Mayu and the others are still packing up.

"I know, but I need to talk to you."

You tug your arm out of his grasp, adjusting the bag that had slid off of your shoulder.

He hesitates, looking conflicted for a moment before letting out a quiet sigh. “I didn’t mean to make you angry.” He trails off, clearly searching for the right words. "I didn’t know how else to get you alone, and we need to talk."

"You made it pretty clear that I wasn’t worth talking to before. So why should I now?" You retort.

His face stiffens at your words, the usual impassive look falling over his features again. For a split second, he almost seems like he wants to say something, but then he presses his lips together tightly, as though debating with himself.

“I need you to know that I’m not avoiding you, or trying to make you uncomfortable. I’m just bad at this. At all of this." His voice grows quieter with each word, afraid someone else is going to hear.

You’re caught off guard by the vulnerability in his words, even if it’s not quite enough to dissolve the anger and disappointment that had been simmering since you last spoke.

"Why now?" you ask, the words slipping out before you can stop them. "Why are you talking to me now, after all this time? Just because we’re in a study group together?”

"I don’t know," he admits, the edge of frustration creeping back into his voice. "I just... I didn’t want things to stay the way they were. And I didn’t want to keep pretending that everything was fine when it wasn’t. Not with you. Not after everything that happened."

Just as the tension between you and Taesan hangs in the air, Mayu's voice cuts through the moment.

“Hey, are you ready to leave?” she asks, her figure appearing in the corner of your vision as she stands just a few feet away, arms crossed as she watches the two of you closely.

Taesan immediately steps back, the space between you widening. You glance at Mayu, grateful for the interruption, even if it’s not quite the escape you were hoping for.

"Yeah, just about," you reply quickly, giving Mayu a small nod. You try to keep your voice steady, though you can’t help it when your voice trembles slightly.

Mayu raises an eyebrow at the two of you, clearly noticing the quiet tension, but she doesn’t say anything further. Instead, she gives you a brief look and then turns, making her way to the door.

“I’ll wait for you downstairs,” she says with a soft smile.

You take a deep breath, glancing back at Taesan. “You should go.” you say, the words coming out quieter than you intended.

Just as you start to turn away, Taesan’s voice stops you.

"Wait," he says, his tone firm, and it makes you freeze mid-step. You glance over your shoulder at him, your heart racing a little as his presence feels suddenly even more intense.

He’s standing there, hands shoved into his pockets, his gaze avoiding yours for a second before it finally meets yours.

“I should have said something that day,” he continues, his voice softer than before. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

You feel a pang in your chest. His words don’t quite match his usual demeanor, and it throws you off. You’re not sure what to do with this sudden shift in his approach.

He takes a small step closer. “I don’t expect you to forgive me or anything. I just-” He hesitates, unsure, before looking away. “I just wanted you to know that I didn’t mean to hurt you. And I don’t want you to think I don’t care about you.”

“You’re not the problem here,” he says, almost too quickly, as if trying to convince both you and himself. “I’m not good with people. And I don’t know how to say the right things when I want to. I don’t want you to think I don’t care.”

The version of Taesan you know, the one who could be rude one moment and kind the next, feels so different now. And for some reason, hearing him say it aloud makes you question everything you thought you knew about him.

“Why didn’t you say this sooner?” you ask, your voice shaking just slightly. “Then why did you act like you didn’t care? Why push me away if you knew all along?””

Taesan runs a hand through his hair, he lets out a deep sigh. "I was scared. This is the first time I’ve felt like this,” he admits, looking at you with frustration “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know how to fix it, but I’m trying.”

You stare at him, trying to process everything he’s saying.

“Look,” you say, the frustration finally bubbling over. "I’m not doing this right now. You made it clear that you couldn’t figure out how to talk to me before, and now you want to fix it all at once?" You shake your head, unable to make sense of it.

Taesan opens his mouth as if to say something, but you don’t wait for him to speak. Turning on your heel, you walk back toward the door where Mayu is waiting, the tension between you and Taesan hanging in the air like an unanswered question.

As you pass the threshold, you can feel Taesan’s eyes on you, but you don’t turn back. You’re not sure what this is, or if it’s even something that can be fixed. For now, all you want is to be somewhere else, away from this conversation, away from all of it.

Mayu is standing by the door, arms crossed and brow raised, but she doesn’t ask. She doesn’t need to. You nod at her, offering a small, strained smile.

“I’m ready,” you say quietly, and together, you head for the stairs. You’re not sure if you believe him, or if you even want to. But for now, you just need distance.

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ragana62 · 12 hours ago

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Hermione doesn't break rules openly, because she knows that having the aura of following rules means that when someone starts looking at the trio for who was responsible for all the laws broken, she will be written off on principle. She knows that being the responsible one gives her protection, and it gives all of them an escape route should things go badly.

I have always held it as a survival tactic. It's Hermione knowing that nobody even notices the quiet, polite, bookworm in the corner who just keeps her nose down and always turns in her work, with extra credit, perfectly complete a day early at least. The magical world is a dangerous place, she doesn't know anyone there at the start, and the people she does know have made clear to her on observation that even for those the magical world doesn't hate on sight, there's not much of a guarantee of help coming much less help that can do much of anything in the face of some of the opposition. She needs to fade into the background, because being in the spotlight is a target, and if she is going to take the spotlight, it needs to be for something positive like her academic work where she can still be written off as 'one of the good ones'.

And... it works. First year Hermione can walk up to multiple professors and say 'It's my fault, I read about trolls and thought I could stop it before it hurt anyone, they were just helping me' and every last one of them just nods and says 'yes, that seems perfectly plausible, good job boys, perhaps we don't do that again Hermione'. Second year Hermione already knows how to brew multiple NEWT level highly controlled potions and can steal the ingredients to make them, brew the potions in broad daylight, and turn up into the hospital wing when one goes wrong looking like a were-cat, and it raises no questions. The assumption is that she was just trying to work ahead and made a mistake, it absolutely wouldn't be that she stole ingredients to knock students unconscious and stick them into a closet so her friends could break into another house's common room while impersonating them. We see the pattern time and time again.

Hermione doesn't openly break rules, so her teachers, her peers even, don't look at her when a rule is broken, and more than that, if something goes wrong in the pursuit of breaking rules, she can bullshit her way out of it with little more than a 'oops, I was just really excited to try something new I learned and it went a little wrong, I'm sorry' and the problem goes away. And that's exactly why she feels confident she can get away with putting Rita in a jar, or stealing books from Dumbledore's office after sixth year, or any number of other things. Because she already has gotten away with things like that, and quite frankly, even if she does get caught, all she has to do is say 'I'm sorry, I was just really interested in some new reading material and didn't think he would mind since it was to help Harry...' and McGonagall will ignore it, or 'She broke the law, look, unregistered animagus! I was just trying to be responsible and help, especially with all the bad things happening around the tournament, you don't think she might have something to do with that, do you?' and everyone will just say 'ah yes, Hermione was just trying to enforce the rules and got a little overzealous, this is why we're going to make you a prefect. Maybe we need to put a little more thought into how we do that next time, okay? In the magical world, we tell an adult these things, instead of just jumping straight to trying to catch the perpetrator ourselves.'.

(I also think this is why Dumbledore is so confident in just saying 'two turns, you can save them both, have fun kids' and knowing she will know what he means. He has a rather similar understanding that appearances will always matter more than actions when it comes to consequences, even if I don't always agree as much with the actions he chooses to use appearances to cover over, and I think he recognizes that in her as well.)

i love how hermione has such a rule following aura that everyone ignores that she is the real rule breaker of the trio. harry sneaks out at night sometimes. hermione straight up kidnapped a whole woman and held her prisoner in an enchanted jar. even tom riddle didn't do that.

#hermione granger #harry potter #harry potter headcanon #hp headcanon #hp meta #I stand by my (probably should have been in jail by now at least a few times over but it's fine) wife

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trippinsorrows · 9 hours ago

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10 things + part three

authors note: after 87 years of waiting, here is the third and final part to this mini series. def struggled with writing it, as i haven't been in the headspace for it, hence why it hasn't been updated in so long. hope it was worth the wait and not a disappointment. ❤️

words: 5k

warnings: angst

part one + part two

***gif belongs to @dejameflorecer ***

It’s been a week.

A week since an already tumultuous relationship went from bad to worse in a matter of minutes.

Nova isn’t sure if she’s ever cried as much as she has in the past week. Maybe not since the death of her childhood dog, Sadie, when she was twenty-one. But, this kind of grief is something different. Something heavier and devastating.

Something heartbreaking.

A part of her saw it coming. Nova knew it was only a matter of time before things with RJ and Roman reached a boiling point. The tension and animosity seemed like it grew by the day though something that’s actually existed for years.

The same amount of time she’s worked so hard to fix it. To repair what’s clearly broken. But, it’s always come at a cost. The latest expense, however, is unacceptable. On several fronts.

Roman put his hands on RJ.

He put his hands on their son. Their child. An act that resulted in RJ unintentionally hurting his little sister.

Two of her three children were hurt, in different ways, by their own father.

Nova knows Roman would never ever do anything to intentionally hurt any of their kids, but that doesn’t matter in the face of what’s happened.

What’s done is done, and she doesn’t know how to move past it.

If that’s even a possibility.

He’s tried to reach out. Both have. Roman and RJ, but she’s left them both on read for different reasons, only responding with, 'she's fine' with their questions about Bella. Roman hasn’t tried to come home in the past week, and she’s partially grateful, though it breaks her heart just a little when the girls ask about their dad.

When they ask where daddy is.

She has an idea.

Probably staying in the penthouse.

Or, maybe not.

She struggles between caring and not giving a fuck.

And, her son, via Live 360 shows that he’s been staying with Jey. Unsurprising, to say the least.

RJ has always been close with the twins, Jey especially. And given how Jey and Roman are on the outs, it only makes sense his estranged son would find escape with an estranged cousin.

Nova has to have an emergency session with her therapist. It’s not life-threatening, and she reiterates there are no safety concerns. She just knows she needs to talk with someone. But, even that conversation is only slightly as helpful as she would like it to be, because Nova omits a lot. Primarily the part where Roman shoved RJ, and Bella got hurt in the process. Things are already bad enough. The last thing Nova needs is DCFS opening an investigation.

She has enough going on in her life.

But, what does come out of that session is a realization. A few, but Nova is taking them one at a time.

The doorbell ringing pulls her from her thoughts. She takes a deep breath, reminding herself that she can and needs to do this.

Walking from out the kitchen of her spacious home, she makes her way to the front door, not bothering to look out the peephole.

Opening it, she’s met with the most sheepish expression one could muster.

RJ stands there, hands stuffed in his pockets. “Hey, mama….”

Instantly, her eyes are watering. As upset she might have been, and still is with her son, that’s her baby boy.

Stepping aside, she motions for him to come in. He does so, keeping an almost careful distance between them. Like, he’s being cautious.

Looking around, he asks, “where—where are the girls?”

An understandable question. RJ is a good big brother, and the girls adore him. Have missed him the same way they miss their dad. But, they don’t need to be around for this.

“With grandma and grandpa,” she answers. Nova leads them over to the living room where she takes a seat on the big sofa. Junior remains standing, nervous almost. She pats the space next to her. “Take a seat.”

He hesitates, but only for a second. Slowly, he lowers his body onto the sofa, legs semi spread, big foot tapping. A nervous thing, clearly.

Nova doesn't say anything at first, taking time to gather her words.

“I’m sorry, mama,” RJ blurts, like holding it any long would be too painful. “I didn't—” He closes his eyes, shaking his head. “I would never hurt Bella or you or Cami or—”

“I know, honey,” she answers in a low voice. “It–it was a mistake.” Because, it was. For all her son’s faults and vices, that is most definitely not one of them.

Same for Roman.

But, that’s another conversation.

“Does she—does she hate me?” A quiet, almost fearful question.

Nova smiles softly, reaching a hand over. “No, Junior. She doesn’t hate you. She could never hate you.” Because while Bella was understandably upset that night, the following morning, she was asking about her big brother and daddy.

Her little girl could never be mad at the men in her life for too long.

Something she clearly gets from her mother.

Another question. “Do you hate me?”

At that, Nova’s eyes widen. She leans over, taking RJ’s hand in her own. “RJ, I could never hate you, baby. I love you. I was….I was upset with you, yes, but I could never hate you.” The truth. The God’s honest truth. “But, I do—I do need to talk to you.” She swallows, jumping straight to it. “Honey, how do you know about your dad cheating on me?”

Because, in all of the things to come out of that terrible night, that has to be the one thing that’s kept her up the most.

She’d prepared to go to her grave keeping that secret from her children.

Nova sees the way RJ’s expression shifts. Something cold and solemn. “I heard you crying about it that night.” Her stomach drops. “I was coming to ask you for help with my homework, and I saw you. I saw you crying onto Aunt Naomi’s shoulder.”

RJ may not realize it, but he’s just taken her back. Taken Nova back to one of the hardest periods of her life. All of the emotions rushing and slamming into her with newfound intensity. She had no idea her son overheard and saw that. No idea he’s been sitting silently on such a thing for years.

It’s been years since that rough patch with her husband.

“He broke your heart, mama.” She looks away, wiping at her tears. She didn’t realize she still felt so many things from that day. “He cheated on you, broke your heart, and you still took him back.” Her eyes shut, his voice desperate as he asks, “why?”

Nova takes a deep breath. This is the single most difficult conversation she’d both dreaded and never imagined having to have, but here she is.

There is no escaping it now.

“RJ…” Eyes closing, heart racing, she forces it out. “I cheated on your dad first.”

His eyes widen, his jaw partially dropped. He’s stunned. “What?”

Nova forces herself to look over at him, momentarily taken back. It’s like she’s looking at her heartbroken husband all over again.

She sniffles, wiping her eyes, moving into a well deserved explanation. “I was 23. Your dad was on the road wrestling. And, I was here, working a full time job, taking care of you. We were struggling financially, so he had to be gone. He was trying to help provide for us, and I knew that. But….but, I got lonely, and I—I started to resent that he was gone all the time.” A summarized explanation leaving out a lot of details that, even with RJ knowing about the affairs, Nova knows he doesn’t need to know. “He—” This is the part that she’ll forever regret and never be able to forget for as long as she lives. “He walked in on me and the man in bed, flowers and chocolate in hand. He—he’d come home to surprise you and I.” Her voice cracks, the emotion tipping over. “I’ll never forget how devastated he looked.”

Gutted. He was gutted. Furious but more hurt than anything.

“Sweetie.” Nova presses her lips together, shaking her head. “I broke your dad’s heart first.”

It was the reason she first started going to therapy all those years ago. Because Nova struggled deeply with how she betrayed Roman. How she’d allowed temporary emotions to lead her into making what remains one of the biggest regrets of her life.

RJ is stunned into silence, looking down, bewildered and floored. “I—I can’t—”

“You were right, honey. Your father did cheat on me, and he did break my heart.” Nova can’t and won’t deny that. Two truths can be right in the same universe. Roman was wrong, and so was she. But, they worked hard to move past those two major trust and boundary violations. So hard. “But, I chose to forgive him, because I love him, because he found it in his heart to forgive me, because he loves me.” She reaches over, gently stroking the back of his head. “The same way he loves you.”

He says nothing, clearly still struggling between maintaining his wall, and maybe, just maybe, letting it down just enough.

“Do you….do you remember how I used to record all your games, and—” A small, silly smile breaks on her face as she recalls her scowling little boy blushing almost from embarrassment. “And, you used to always ask me why I did it? Used to tell me it wasn’t that big a deal?”

He nods, still saying nothing, a frown present on his face.

“Baby…” Her head tilts, that smile growing just a smidge. “I did it, because your dad asked me to.” Junior’s eyes widen once more at yet another bombshell being dropped on him. “And the first thing he did when he got home and had time, he’d watch them. Every single game. From start to finish. Take notes, too.”

RJ looks as breathless as he sounds. “What?”

“I know….” She sniffles, tears cascading down her face. “I know he wasn’t there a lot when you were younger, and I realize now how that impacted you more than I realized, but sweetheart, he would come home as often as he could. Even if it meant us losing out on money, he would come home, RJ. And, he came because he wanted to see you.”

Another whispered confession from the depths of long buried trauma. “He did?”

Nova tilts her head, a small scoff leaving her mouth. “Roman is….he can be difficult at times.” Difficult feels too much of a simplification, prompting her to explain. “He’s stubborn and hardheaded, and he thinks he knows everything sometimes. If not all of the time, and he was wrong to put his hands on you. You can bet I’ll be talking to him about that.”

Because, she will. Because, Nova cannot see how there’s a way to move past that and act like nothing happened.

Roman took it too far this time.

Way too far.

“But baby, you can also be stubborn and hardheaded. I know….I know you may not want to hear this, but you’re a lot like your dad, and I think that’s also why you two clash the way you do.” Two titans fighting for dominance. Neither willing to break or back down.

At least, until now.

“I—” He finally speaks, ending his minutes long silence. “I didn’t know….I always felt….he never acted like….” Roman Jr. struggles to verbalize what is clearly years worth of pain and hurt. And, Nova won’t make him.

She knows exactly what he’s trying to say.

“RJ, in all the years I’ve known and been with your dad, I’ve only seen him cry once, and that was the day you were born.” Nova will never forget the silent tears that ran down Roman's face as he held his son for the first time. He was so happy. “Honey…..” She takes a second to find the right words. “Your dad….he’s always struggled with feelings and emotions and showing them, but I need you to believe me when I tell you that he loves you. He always has, and he always will.” RJ looks away, shutting his eyes. A lone tear escaping. “I know things between you two have been rough, and I’m so sorry if you knowing about the affair has played any role in the deterioration of your relationship, but please don’t let that get in the way of things. You need your dad in your life, and believe me or not, he needs you, too.”

They all need each other, but it starts with them.

Father and son.

It started with them, and it needs to end with them.

—--------

Roman was just readying to head out. He was doing his best to respect the space Nova clearly wanted, but being away from his girls was becoming too much. She graciously replied to only one of his many texts, simply sharing that Bella was okay.

Nothing else.

And, it wasn’t that Roman didn’t understand the distance she was placing between them. He fully did, but it didn’t negate the fact that he missed his family. He misses his family.

He needs to see them.

He needs to see all his kids and speak to them, but one step at a time.

Keys in hand, Roman opens the door at the same time his entire body stills.

“Junior….”

Sure enough, his oldest stands before him, expression clearly torn. A similar experience to what Roman himself has felt the past week.

RJ swallows, gesturing inside the penthouse. “Are—are you busy?”

Roman takes a second to respond, surprised as all hell by the last person he expected to see. The last person he expected to want to see him.

“No….no….come…come in.”

Roman steps aside, and his son does just as such. Closing and locking the door, Roman watches RJ walk over and sit on the sofa, legs spread, hands clasped together as he stares at the expensive rug.

For a moment, Roman stands unsure of what to do. Lord knows he has no idea what to fucking say. He was prepared to plead to and with his wife. Not his oldest son.

Not yet, at least.

Nevertheless, he finds himself sitting on the sofa, opposite of RJ, that tension previously felt between them at any given point suddenly melted into something almost unidentifiable. He doesn’t know what exactly it is. Just that it feels different.

Finally, Roman realizes he’s the one that needs to break this. In more ways than one. “Junior—”

“Mama told me what happened.”

Roman frowns, confused and lost. “About?”

He watches RJ swallow. “The affairs.” Roman’s back straightens. He’s most definitely wondered about that part of RJ’s angry outburst all week. Just how he knew. But, that’s suddenly less concerning in the face of what was just said. “How…how she cheated on you first, and you forgave her.”

The older man nods. “I did.”

RJ looks up. “How you cheated on her, and she forgave you.”

Roman swallows. “She did.” An act of grace and mercy Roman will forever be grateful for. Always. “Son….” Roman pauses, taking a deep breath. He wasn’t prepared for this, hadn’t gone over what he wanted to say if and when this moment came. But, sitting across from his firstborn, he’s realizing it’s less about preparation and more about honesty.

He needs to speak from the heart.

It’s time for all this to stop.

“I’m not a perfect man, and I never will be.” Roman does his best to keep his words clear, concise, and to the point. “I’ve hurt you, hurt your mom, hurt my family over the years, and I can’t….I can’t change that. I can’t take back what I’ve done, even though I’d give anything to. You…you have no idea.” He pauses, his own emotions taking a front seat. “I—I always said I would never be anything like my father. He’s a coldhearted bastard who only cares about power, success, and performance. Always told me I needed to be the best and anything less was unacceptable.” Roman runs his hand over his face, revisiting a long ago memory. “The day you were born was both the happiest and scariest fucking day of my life. I—I swore to you that day that I’d always be there for you, that I’d be a good dad to you, and that hasn’t happened.” His eyes shut, glazed over with vulnerability and accountability. “And, I’m sorry, son. I am so fucking sorry.”

RJ looks away, clearly overwhelmed by all of the emotions and unexpected confessions the day has brought. But, it’s time, and he knows it. Time to let go of the hurt, of the pain. It’s time to be honest.

“Mama told me….she told me you were the one who wanted her to record my games. That you…that you watched them.” He shakes his head, finally looking over at his father, also with unshed tears in his eyes. “All these years, I’ve been so upset with you, so angry with you. Because I thought you hurt mom, and I thought you didn’t care. Because….because you weren’t there, and I wanted you to be…to be proud of me.” He swallows, jaw clenching from the heaviness of it all. “I wanted….” His voice breaks. “I wanted my dad to love me.”

Roman’s exterior completely shatters. “Junior….”

Without thinking or even overthinking it, Roman stands and moves to sit next to his son, not wasting a single second to pull him into a hug.

A hug that RJ, for the first time in years, reciprocates.

Roman cradles the back of his head, offering the sort of comfort that his son has wanted for years. The love he’s craved. “Son, I’ve loved you since the day you were born. I’ve always loved you, and I always will.” A vow. A promise. Something that can and will never be broken. Not from this day forward. “And, I am so proud of you.”

RJ’s eyes clench shut.

Years.

For years, he’s wanted and craved for so long.

Something he’s had the entire time.

“You’re a fine young man, RJ.” Roman compliments, pulling back, hand gently on the back of his son’s neck. “A better man than I could ever be, and I’m sorry for the role I’ve played in your hurt. I’m gonna do better. By you. By your mom. By your sisters. All of you. I promise.”

Roman has a lot of work to do. He knows this. This one conversation, as heartfelt and vulnerable as it is, can’t undo years of damage and trauma. There’s a long road ahead, but it’s a road he’s willing to travel on.

A journey to healing he’s more than ready to make.

—-----

Despite the unexpected appearance of his son at his doorstep, and the vulnerable conversation that followed, Roman still found his way back to the house.

He has to.

For a week, he’s suffered, as deserved, reliving the incident in his head like a bad song on repeat. He fucked up. A line was crossed that had never been crossed, and while he can’t blame Nova for icing him out, the truth remains that that’s still his wife. Those are his daughters. His son.

His family.

He has to make things right.

Or, at least, try.

He’s certain Nova looked through the peephole before answering, because her usual greeting of “who is it?” is bypassed and traded with the door being swung open. And, there she stands, looking just as beautiful as she always has.

But, there’s a sadness about her eyes that makes him frown. A sadness because of him.

Nova eyes him up and down. “You talked to RJ?” It’s not a question, not with the almost declaratory nature of her tone. Still, he feels obligated to at least reply.

“Yeah,” he answers.

She continues to look at him before closing the door behind her and walking over to the wooden bench on their porch. He’s prepared to remain standing when she pats the space next to her.

He obliges.

She’s quiet, Roman able to tell she’s deep in thought, hence him not saying anything. Just giving her the space to think and speak, when ready.

“Roman, what happened….what happened was not okay.” She starts off, hands planted on her thighs. Nova looks at him. “You lost your temper, but not even that, you lost your temper with our son, and Bella got hurt in the process.”

He closes his eyes. She’s not saying anything he doesn’t already know. Nothing he hasn’t mentally berated himself over for the past week. As he deserves. But, there’s something about hearing her say it aloud, the devastation in her voice, that makes it that much worse. It twists the knife.

“I know,” is all he can say. He won’t make excuses. There are none to make.

“You’ve had an anger problem since we were kids, Roman. But, it’s never….” She trails off, looking away and taking a deep breath. “You need help.”

“You’re right,” he swallows. She’s always been right. He’s just been too stubborn and headstrong to see and/or acknowledge it. “I should have never put my hands on him. It should have never reached that point, but it did, and I’m so sorry, Nova. What happened was fucked up and not okay.” She glances over at him, Roman having to fight back the urge to wipe away her tears. “I haven’t been the husband you deserve or the father I need to be for our kids, and I’ve realized the only way that can change is if I get the help I need.”

All truthful, painful, almost embarrassing confession from a man who’s gradually come to realize the extent and depth of damage he’s done. Somewhere along the way, Roman lost himself. Lost sight of what was most important, and it’s caused him to land exactly where he is.

Practically begging for another chance.

“RJ….RJ told me….told me that you two talked,” she finally speaks after a good minute. “He—he said that you’re going to try to work on your relationship. That….that you asked him to think about doing family therapy with you.”

Roman nods. “I did.”

She casts him a leveled look. “Did you mean it though?”

An easy answer, probably the easiest he’s given all day. “Yes.”

Roman doesn’t necessarily like the idea of therapy. He’s done it before, but still. Feelings and emotions, and talking about them, have never been the easiest for him. But, what he wants more than anything is to repair his relationship with the people he loves the most, and if this is the way to do that, then he’ll do it ten times over.

“And what about individual therapy?” She’s probing, prying to see where his headspace is and how far he’s willing to go to right all his many wrongs.

“That too,” he agrees. “Whatever….whatever I have to do, Nova. I’ll do. I love you. I love our kids, and I love our family. I’ll do whatever it takes to fix this, and I know it starts with me. Nova….” He reaches for her hand, her emotional gaze on him. “I’m not asking for your forgiveness, baby. I know I have to earn that. I have a lot to earn back….” He trails off but never breaks their eye contact. “I’m just asking for another chance.”

Nova doesn’t answer right away, and he doesn’t expect her to. He knows that sometimes she has to sit and think on things. That the gravity of the situation may require additional time. And, he’ll give her that. He’ll give her all the space she needs, because he owes her that much and so much more.

“The girls have missed you.”

But, have you?

Roman has to stop himself from actually asking her.

“I’ve missed them, too.”

I’ve missed you.

Nova takes a deep breath. “I think we should go to marriage counseling again.”

Yet another thing they’re on the same page with. They attended two times prior, both times to process and work through the affairs. Roman found it helpful then. He’s sure he’ll find it helpful now.

“I agree.”

She nods, looking at their conjoined hands, the sun peaking past and under the gable roof reflecting off her wedding ring and his wedding band. “I—I want your focus to primarily be on RJ. That has to be worked on, Roman, if this is going to work.”

“I know.” More agreement of a truth he can’t deny anymore. “I’m gonna make it right, Nova.”

She stares at him, looks at him in a way no one else but she can. Like, she can read him better than he can read himself. “You can come back home.” Roman closes his eyes, a massive wave of relief and joy coming over him. “But, I swear to God, Roman, if you ever put your hands on my son again, this marriage is over. I will divorce your ass so fast, and not only will I get sole custody of the girls, any visits you have with them will be supervised only.” She finishes her firm, assertive declaration with a pointed look. “Do you understand me?”

The thought of such a situation guts Roman. He would never hurt his daughters. Ever. Will forever regret shoving his son. And, he knows good and well as much as Nova might love him, she’s a mother first. Their kids will always be her first priority, as they should be. He respects that. Immensely.

“I understand,” he acknowledges. Roman runs his thumb over her knuckles. “Thank you.”

Nova doesn’t say anything. She just motions to the door. “The girls are in there with Junior.”

Her answer surprises him. He wondered who was watching their daughters while they spoke, but he assumed her parents were over. “Yeah?”

She nods, standing up. She offers her hand, prompting him to stand as well. “Come on.”

Roman wordlessly follows her inside of their home, gently squeezing her hand as she calls out, “girls! Daddy’s home!”

The sound of his girls giggling and making sounds of excitement is accompanied by her squeezing his hand back.

A start.

It’s a start.

—---------

The Raw premiere on Netflix is major.

A groundbreaking, memorable occasion worthy of all the lights, glamour, and action. It’s a make or break night for Roman, the night where it’s decided, once and for all, who the real Tribal Chief is.

Nova and her girls are in attendance. A night so big that she can’t afford to miss it, won’t allow it to pass without her showing up to support her husband.

In the months since the blowup, a lot has occurred. Nova’s ultimatum of sorts with her husband proved effective. He found a therapist and has been attending weekly consistently. They’re also in couples counseling. Not to mention, he and RJ have also been attending weekly therapy together, though virtual, what with Junior away at school and Roman’s schedule being hectic.

There have been some really great times and some tense times, but overall, Nova can see it. Can feel it. Can feel the healing that’s occurring. There are still a ways to go, especially between her son and husband, but they’re not where they were, and that’s all that matters.

They’re moving in the right direction.

Finally.

It’s a tense, violent match.

Nova is on the edge of her seat the entire time, a bit unsurprised and grateful that her daughters are tuned in mostly to their tablets instead of their daddy fighting. Too many times where Solo is close to pinning Roman for her liking, but the whole thing has just been too close for her liking. Matches always make her nervous, and the absence of her son doesn’t help.

Roman invited RJ, as did Nova, but he never gave a solid answer.

It definitely hurt, both herself and her husband, but she could understand why.

There’s still a lot of grounds for those two to cover, and RJ’s speed at which he progresses on this new path is something that can’t be rushed.

She won’t pressure him.

He has to do this at his own pace.

Though, she can’t deny the bittersweet sensation that fills her when Roman makes the pin, when that 3 is finally achieved, signifying that her husband is the one and only Tribal Chief. The true Head of the Table. The OTC.

As proud as she is of him, of the long, hard battles he’s faced to get this point, not being able to share the moment with their firstborn is rough.

But, she braves a smile and blows a kiss to him, holding Cami, pointing to Roman who continues to take in the thunderous applause. Bella stands on the chair next to her, holding onto her dress while also pointing a finger in the air, matching the other attendees.

It dims her sadness just a bit.

However, it’s when the sounds of the crowd shift, and she turns her focus to the ramp that her stomach drops.

She sees Dwayne, Roman's cousin, but she also sees someone else.

She sees RJ.

“The Rock is heading down the ramp, and he’s accompanied by Roman Reigns’ son, RJ Reigns!” She can briefly overhear the commentary, sees the gasp and shock of the crowd. But, it’s the two of them moving into the ring as well as Roman’s unsure expression that has her focus.

Dwayne is the first to hug and embrace Roman, mouthing something in his ear. Nova watches with continued confusion as the hug breaks, and he moves to take the sacred ula fala from Paul. Roman’s shoulders move up and down, as he pants, still trying to fully catch his breath, lingering exhaustion from the match. But both herself and Roman still watching Dwayne's next move.

He hands the ula fala to RJ.

Nova gasps. “Oh my God...”

Tears spill over as RJ walks over to his dad, offering a warm, proud smile. He nods, and Roman’s head dips just enough so RJ can place it on him. Right before her son pulls his father into a hug.

Her heart just about combusts in that moment.

It swells and nears explosion, watching the two men in her life embrace, both their eyes shut from the emotionality of it all. The crowd around them applauds, completely unaware just what this moment means to them.

To her family.

And, Nova sees it. Sees the way RJ’s mouth moves, saying something to Roman.

“I love you, dad.”

She doesn’t need to see Roman to know and hear exactly what he says in response.

“I love you, too, son.”

RJ claps his dad on the back, breaking the hug to stand beside him, raising Roman’s arm. Ones in the sky amongst the thousands in attendance that chant OTC. A proud, emotional expression on Nova’s face as she cries, overwhelmed with happiness and relief.

For the crowd, the OTC is back on top.

For her, for her family, the healing is just beginning.

#roman reigns fanfic #roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns #roman reigns x black!oc #arisnotebook

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swtt4hk · 2 days ago

Text

Are we still lovers? || ex!Cho Sang-woo x fem!Reader (Oneshot)

requested by: anonymous!

author’s note: this was inspired by the song “Are we still friends?” By Tyler , The Creator! It also contains some curse words…enjoy!

he’s here…again. Cho Sang-woo , your ex , is here to beg you to come back again. Everyday is the same shit. He comes over shouting and wakes up the whole neighbourhood just to beg you to come back. But of course you’re not going back to him , not after what he did to you.

You and Cho Sang-woo had been together for a few years now. You were both really happy with your relationship and were even planning to get married soon. Until one day , everything changed.

Flashback

—I’m breaking up with you.

You freeze. Him wanting to break up with you was the last thing you expected to hear.

—w-what? No , you aren’t.

—yes , I am. I’ve already packed your things.

—what?! But why?! Is there anyone else? What happened? What about our plans? You were just telling me , a few days ago , about where you want us to get married!

You protest with tears in your eyes. The truth is , Sang-woo didn’t want to break up with you either. He loved you a lot. But he had just gotten an offer to go work in America and he couldn’t turn down such offer. Money was tough and he couldn’t take you with you , so he had to make a decision. It was either you or his career. But his ego took over him and he chose to go to America. He thought that if he stayed here , he wouldn’t achieve anything and would make your life harder. But let’s be real. Work was his top priority, you were his second choice.

—do I really need to explain this to you? Don’t make this any harder for me and leave.

—no! Sang-woo , I’m your girlfriend and I have every right to know why you want to break up with me!

His jaw clenched in frustration and sighs.

—you wanna know the truth so badly, huh? Here it is then. I’m leaving you. I’m going to America. I got offered a better position and I’ll make much more money than I do here.

your eyes soften as tears roll down your cheek.

—Sang-woo , that’s amazing…why can’t I come with you?

He can’t tell you. He can’t admit that he doesn’t have any money. He’ll seem weak and miserable , so he lies instead. He has to.

—I don’t need any distractions. Also , the work hours will be long.

Then it hits you. He doesn’t love you anymore? He finds you a distraction? That’s not the Sang-woo you know…there is more to it.

—Cho Sang-woo! Stop lying and tell me why you don’t want me to come with you!

—I can’t sit here and argue about something pointless. Just take your things and go!

You burst into tears , take your things and go. You don’t have any choice.

End of Flashback

Ding dong

Here we go again.

—y/n! I know you’re in there , please just open the door! How many times do I have to apologise?!

you walk to the door

—you think an apology can fix this? You’re such an asshole , you don’t know me at all.

—please , just please open the door…

his voice breaks and cries. You’re tired of this shit. It wouldn’t hurt if you finally opened the door , right?

the door unlocks , revealing Sang-woo on the floor , his shirt half unbuttoned and his cheeks red. He must be drunk.

—you better have a good explanation.

You say coldly , not even offering to help him get up.

—can…can I come in?

He says and looks at you like some desperate puppy. You sigh and gesture him to come in. You both sit on the couch and wait for him to speak.

—y/n…can you please come back? I’m sorry. I need you. I promise I’ll be a better man for you.

You scoff at his words.

—I didn’t let you in for you to tell me the same shit you’ve been telling me for the past month. I need to hear something new.

He looks down at his feet in embarrassment. He is ashamed for what he did. After he moved to America , everything was going well at first. Until everything started going downhill. It turned out that he owners of the company he was working in had committed a bunch of crimes , scammed people , including Sang-woo. He , then , realised how big of a mistake he had made. He had left the love of his life , the person who gave him courage and happiness just for money. He knew it wouldn’t be so easy to come back to you but he was determined to get you back.

—y/n…if I explain…will you accept me back?

sighs

—no promises.

He lets out a small chuckle. He knew that you would react like this and it’s funny how well he knows your reactions.

—alright then…

Sang-woo explains everything to you , detail by detail and you’re left stunned. That’s both stupid and sweet at the same time. You found it cute and sweet that he thought he would seem weak and wanted to provide you with more money but that fact that HE BROKE UP WITH YOU and moved away just for money was stupid asf.

—Sang-woo…

—I know. I’m a dumbass.

You chuckle.

—yes , you are. But , first of all , why did you break up with me to move to America? I have a job , I could work some extra hours to get more money and I could come with you some months later. Second of all , you’re stupid for thinking I would find you ‘weak’ for not having enough money to take me with you. Third , you’re an asshole because you put work first and then me.

Sang-woo nods. He totally agrees with what you’re saying but he’s still surprised that you’re not screaming at him.

—I’m…I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?

—well…no. Not exactly. I’m glad that you finally confessed but I will not be accepting you back. It hurts. What you did hurts a lot and I don’t think I can ever forget what you did to me.

—oh…

—I’d like you to move on. Please don’t contact me anymore. Thank you so much for everything , truly.

You say and get up. You open the door and gesture him to get out.

—goodbye , Sang-woo. I hope you find the right one.

Sang-woo , with tears in his eyes , gets up and leaves. He looks at you one more time before leaving , all the memories fading and a new chapter of both of your lives starting.

This isn’t the end. This is only the beginning of a new and better life.

———————————————————————

Idk why but I think I made y/n a lil bit pick me , so I apologise 😭

Taglist: @sensationallysangwoo

@chosangwooswife

@nanamiscsleeve

@snowgirl12

@vkeyy

@lfegoeson

#cho sang woo #squid game #cho sangwoo #park haesoo #cho sang woo x reader #cho sangwoo x you #sangwoo squid game #fanfic #squid game fic #park hae soo

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cocogum · 2 days ago

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The Great Wave - Chapter 17 Review

‼️SPOILERS FOR THE CHAPTER‼️

Nothing too major happens in this chapter which I think is a good way to relax a bit from all the serious stuff (and doppelgangers) that we've had to see in older chapters. But sadly, we don't get to see Amalia freaking out over the orphan ouginaks like a customer at a pet smart store (sorry @kirichux looks like it'll just stay a fantasy 😭) Too bad that didn't happen (for now 👹). Either way, it's at least nice to know that Yugo was actually not personally angry at Joris but rather just had a very serious while thinking about daddy Rasalar's face in the last chapter.

OMG LUIS STILL KEEPS CALLING HIM JOJO ‼️‼️‼️

I mean I know that he still does call him 'Jojo' since we also saw him in season 4 calling Joris like that, but I'm just happy to see him addressing him like that even in the Great Wave 💕💕💕💕

And yeah Luis is right, relax you're not acting as Bonta's representative/messenger right now lol Even your shushu has a point which is honestly saying A LOT. You can call them your besties here Joris don't be shy 🥰🥰🥰

And speaking of Yugo, I'm semi glad that the face he made last chapter wasn't meant for Joris. Cuz not only would he have confused the living hell out of Joris but he would have also scared the crap out of these kids.

JORIS IS WORRIED FOR HIS DEMIGOD BESTIE ‼️‼️‼️ OMG RASALAR IS GONNA GET HIS SEXY ASS KICKED ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

(sidenote: I personally see Lilotte as Joris's mortal bestie while Yugo is his demigod bestie. Yeah that's how I think i know it's clever ✨️✨️)

(yeah @geekgirles ur right, these two look so good in that panel 💗💗)

Like Joris is literally hearing that his demigod bestie got poisoned by the dragon who was meant to use him as a vessel. Shit was always personal but Joris knows that he crossed a line when he went for Yugo 🩷🩷

This must be such a weird day for Joris to visit memory lane again. First, he catches a thief who looks way too much like his past best friend. Then, he learns from Yugo and Amalia that the dragon who was meant to use him as a vessel poisoned Yugo.

Who's next on the list that would resurface from the dead and punch his childhood in the dick? His mom??

HAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAAHHAAHHAHAAHAHAHHA-

So uh Atcham really doesn't remember...either he sucks at remembering past faces or he's genuinely tweaking.

No cuz like wtf is going on in his head?? Same with Kerubim. Aren't they aware that they're standing face to face with Lilotte's doppelganger??? Come on, they literally look THE SAME. Fine, maybe Atcham kinda forgot since he had only seen Lilotte a few times BUT KERUBIM DOESN'T HAVE ANY EXCUSES TO NOT REMEMBER!?!?

He literally watched Joris GROW UP WITH LILOTTE. She was literally his best friend! After she died, can you honestly tell me how many more mortals Joris has gotten this close with??? Exactly. Atcham may be dumb for not remembering one of Joris' friends, sure, but Kerubim is the true dumbass here.

Speaking of Lilotte actually, Thirteen is clearly her doppelganger but it would be super ironic if her number (aka name 💀) was meant to be a bad omen for Harigue lol (if you forgot who that was, I don't blame you. It was that disgusting old man's name who slaved these precious kids)

Like her number name literally meant 'bad luck'. And you're telling me that she ended up being the one to bring Joris to his base? Yeah, if that isn't shit luck for that old bastard, then i don't know what is. It's especially ironic for her because that ended up being her lucky number 💕💕💕

ALSO PUPUCE IS ALIVE ‼️‼️‼️ WTF ‼️‼️

She's such a fighter, look at her still moving around with her little stubs 💕💕 It's nice to know that she survived 500 years with Joris and can still manage to run around...Pupuce is a real fighter lol

Also fun fact about her kind, they kinda work like bees: when they attack the player, they instantly die afterwards. So one attack equals immediate death. Looks like Pupuce is a pacifist....💀💀

These two bozos forgot that their asses got handed to them and are now Joris's kids. Yet they don't wanna share their stuff with OTHER orphans 😭😭😭

I swear to god it doesn't matter how old they get they are still lazy morons in each life.

I missed Luis's house magic 💕💕 The dofus movie made his skills look so smooth and satisfying like the motion and the way the bowls would just appear out of thin air, I loved it!!

AND THE CHILDREN‼️‼️‼️‼️

LOOK AT HOW THOSE LITTLE PUPS ARE OGGLING THE TABLE!!! That fucking old man never fed them right, he literally lashed out at them that they should be grateful that he feeds them every once and a while. So for them, seeing as table filled with food without anyone pushing them away or sneering at them is literally like seeing a miracle happening right in front of their eyes.

I bet that some of them still can't believe that they're out of the sewers. Those poor kids must be thinking they probably died or something because ever since Thirteen came back to the sewers, they got saved by a strong important guy that managed to scare the shit out of 'their master', got taken out of the sewers, got told they could just call their rescuer by his first name, got told they could stay at their rescuer's house, got told they could eat his food and sleep at his place, AND got told by their rescuer that he would give them normal names.

LIKE PLEASE YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT SOME OF THEM ARE AT LEAST DOUBTING THEIR OWN EXISTENCE RIGHT ABOUT NOW!!!

All I can say is please let Yugo's wave not annihilate them and shred them into more pieces than they're already missing 😭😭

I can't tell if they're purposely being petty assholes while having the mental age of a kid. Cuz wtf bro this is like being a mom and showing off your new baby to your other kids only for them to hate the newborn because they'll have to start sharing everything with them 💀💀

I'll smack these two 😃😃

TWENTY-SEVEN STOP YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE HIM ANYTHING 😫😫😫😫

Don't get me wrong, it's so cute that he gave his (make-shift 😭) teddy to Joris but the fact that he was thinking about giving him anything at all, especially his TEDDY, was as if he gave him some sort of payment rather than a gift. Because why would he give him his teddy of all things? He's still so incredibly young, he obviously uses it all the time. So to give it away would mean that he's so incredibly grateful, he would see it as his payment to Joris so that he and his siblings would be able to stay here 😭😭😭

STOP IT WOULD MAKE TOO MUCH SENSE!!!! 😫😫😫😫

FIVE HUNDRED YEARS WTF MAN 😭😭😭

He says it way too casually too 💀💀

"Yeah no, he's been a pain in my ass for like 500 years now 🙄🙄 urgh I can't stand him sometimes i swear 😒😒" like excuse me????

I'm waiting for the Joris fans to use this face as their pfps lol

And into the abyss they go...

#not much to say about this chapter #other than to say it was nice #the smiles 🩷🩷🩷#calm before the storm 💀💀💀#im starting to have a bad feeling....#wakfu #ankama #krosmoz #wakfu manga #wakfu the great wave #the great wave #the great wave volume 2 #wakfu the great wave volume 2 #wakfu the great wave manga #the great wave manga #wakfu review #wakfu reviews

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moonlitcelestial · 2 days ago

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Chapter 8

Beyond the Lens - Logbook Videographer!Reader x OT8 Ateez

W/C 8,208

🎥 Series Masterlist 🎥

☽ Masterlist ☾

Inspiration Pictures

Pinterest Board Masterlist

Previous Chapter (Chapter 7)

Disclaimer: This story is purely a work of fiction. It is not meant to assume or mock anything about Ateez, Atiny, or anything relating to what I do not know about being a videographer.

Contains she/her pronouns.

The logo in the center is mine. Please do not reuse or copy.

I strongly recommend looking at the inspiration pictures and the Pinterest boards (which will be updating as the story goes on).

General Warnings: slow burn, cussing, conflict, angst, fluff, and obliviousness.

CHAPTER WARNINGS - Overthinking and mentions of an abusive family member. Read at your own risk.

Thanks for reading <3 Moonie

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

You got to KQ and parked in your parking spot, thankfully it was after five so most of the people had gone home for the day. All except for maybe some of the producers, all of whom you could handle if they questioned you about the giants. You and Hongjoong got out of the car and both went to the back seats to let the giants out.

“You know how funny it would be if you walked in with all of them?” You asked as you grabbed Beans and Mocha making sure their leashes were secured correctly. He had grabbed Toothless gently, being careful of the wings on the harness. You laughed at the pair of them as you got around the car, Toothless looked absolutely massive compared to Hongjoong. Hongjoong looked up at you and you could tell he was realizing just how big Toothless was. He set him down on the ground and moved to hand you the leash. You were faster and transferred the other two leashes to him instead. He looked at you with wide eyes.

“They walk with you just like dogs do, don't worry I will be right behind you if anything happens.” You motioned to them. You had made sure to train them well when it came to leashes. They had always been good about not pulling you around.

“Okay” he looked down at the giants who were looking up at him, “come on giants, let's go see the rest of your uncles” he said as he started walking. You let out a loud laugh tipping your head back. He glanced back at you with a small smile and continued walking. The giants were trailing dutifully behind him. You followed a few steps behind him. The closer you got to the practice room the louder the music got, the rest of the boys must be warming up. Hongjoong pushed open the door and stuck a hand in leading the giants in front of him. You heard multiple exclamations as the boys saw them, the music had immediately stopped as they crowded to the giants. You walked in behind them and closed the door.

“Look, it's the Maine Coon Mafia, and their leader has decided to grace us with her presence too.” Wooyoung said as he approached you to give you a side hug. You laughed at his remark and wrapped your arm around his waist to complete the hug. You both watched as San knelt down to pet the three. Mingi and Yuhno had walked over and started petting Beans who had started chirping at everyone's attention. Yeosang and Jongho true to form walked over to Mocha gently and let her sniff them before petting her. You knew the three of them would be besties. Toothless was making his rounds but he stuck close to Seonghwa. He weaved around everyone. Seonghwa caught just a glimpse of the wings on his harness and looked up at you with amusement.

“I didn't do that, it was all Forrest, it was a birthday gift for him last year.” Seonghwa smiled and shook his head at you. You felt Wooyoung leave you and he was replaced quickly with Yuhno and Mingi on either side of you.

“Hi Noona, we have missed seeing you around the building.” you turned to look at Mingi with raised eyebrows.

“You have been hanging out with Woo too much.” You joked, hugging into his side a little tighter. Yuhno laughed loudly and walked away to go sit on the floor with San. Mingi stood with you for a couple of minutes as everyone got their cat fix. Just as Mingi was stepping away Yeosang approached you.

“Y/n-nie are you going to stay for practice?” Everyone's eyes fell to you.

“If that is okay with everyone I don't really have anything going for the rest of the night anyway.” You looked to Hongjoong, he was really the person who you needed the go ahead from.

“Yes, we can turn down the music so we don't disrupt their sensitive hearing,” he looked to San who hadn't even gotten up off the floor from petting Toothless. He was loving having the cats around.

“Okay, sounds good, let me go get their bag and I will be right back.” You stepped toward the door and heard Beans chirp, you turned around to look at her and she wasn't even paying you any attention. She was looking at San who had stood up and stopped paying attention to her. You rolled your eyes and stepped out of the studio.

★☆☽ O ☾☆★

“Okay, so we only have a few minutes to discuss something very serious and I need all of you to be completely honest with me. This is something that affects all of us.” Everyone's gaze locked on him, they were beyond curious of what he could be talking about.

“Okay Hyung, we are listening.”

“I have been seeing the dynamic between all of us and Y/N and I think I know the opinions of all of us but I wanted to ask you all while we are together. Would you all be opposed to letting Y/N join our relationship?” The room was stunned into silence. While all of them knew that they had separately discussed their feelings toward Y/N they had not expected this. They thought that it would be nonnegotiable to add someone to their already large relationship.

“I wouldn't be opposed.”

“I wouldn’t either. She fits in with us really well.” A chorus of similar answers floated around. The excitement was palpable through the air as excited chatter filled the once quiet room. He looked over all of his loves and smiled.

“Okay. I am going to lay down some ground rules. These are not reflecting on any of you, they are just boundaries that I would like to have out in the open. One, you do not approach her romantically until I have the chance to speak to her about our arrangement. Two, we will go at her pace. There are eight of us and only one of her. We do not need her to panic before she gets the opportunity to fall into our routine. Finally, we do not let things drastically change our dynamic. I understand adding another person can be stressful and exciting but I want all of us to be able to talk like we are now, and have in the past, with anything that is bothering us. Is there anything that any of you would like to add?”

Everyone nodded to the terms. They all seemed to be nervously excited. Some of them were holding hands while the others were leaning together.

“If we do this, what happens if the staff see us?”

“If she accepts we will speak to everyone who needs to know and have them sign NDAs. I do not want it to be public right off the bat so we will have to be careful with what we do and where we do it. I have thought this thoroughly through and do not believe that the CEO will be an issue. He is very open minded and was happy with our relationship when we told him. Any other questions?”

“What about her team? Do you think that they will be okay with this?”

“I plan on speaking to them soon but I cannot guarantee it will be quick as our schedule is ramping up. I wanted to make sure that they think she will be okay with it before even approaching her to ask. I would rather be safe than sorry.”

“Okay hyung.”

“That is everything I had. I just wanted to make sure that we were all on the same page before I did anything.”

“I cannot wait to be able to be with her in less of a professional setting.”

“I just want to know what goes through her head when we flirt with her.”

“She probably chalks it up to us being friendly with a camera, she hardly sees us without having one on her.”

“She also knows how we are, she is an Atiny after all.”

“Maybe we need to be a little more forward?” The question was heard but ignored.

“Speaking of Atiny, how do you think they will react if this entire thing goes public.”

“I'm not sure, but I really hope that it isn't too bad.”

“Me too..”

“Doesn't she post under an alias though?”

“Yes all of them do, I had to do some digging around to find it but she posts as Onyx. Her team uses other precious stones as aliases as well, Aurora is Moonstone, Forrest is Topaz, and Willow is Amethyst. They did it for their safety; only some of their clients know their real names. The only reason KQ got it is because some of the fashion designers we work with recommended her. Apparently they are very close with her.”

“Wah that's so cool, now I can look up some of her work.”

Everyone went silent at the footsteps that were approaching the room.

★☆☽ O ☾☆★

You had made it back from your car with the cat go-bag. You knew they ate and drank a little bit at the studio but you wanted them to have an option if they needed more. You heard the chatter from down the hall but it had immediately stopped as you got closer. You peaked your head into the room before walking in so you wouldn't let one of the giants out of the room.

“You guys are too quiet for your own good, it's making me suspicious. You remind me of a bunch of toddlers, if it is too quiet trouble is brewing” You stepped fully into the room and they were in the same spots you had left them in. Some of them made indignant noises at you while rolling their eyes. You quietly laughed as you made your way to the front near the mirrors. You plopped your bag down next to you as you sat at the zero marker. All three of the giants approached you, they knew this bag. You took out the small food tin and filled it for them. You set it to the side and grabbed the small water bowl and a water bottle. You reached over and took the leash portion off of their harnesses. Once you were finished getting your little set up done you looked up to see the boys watching you.

“What? Did I do something? Do I need to move?”

“No no,” Hongjoong said waving his hands, “we are just happy that you are comfortable here. Enough to bring your children here and be with us outside of work.”

“I see,” you could feel the blush creeping up the back of your neck. He smiled at you and walked back to the small table in the back of the room, he started the track they had recorded last week. Your head perked up, you haven't heard the full version of the song yet. Hongjoong seemed to remember the same, he restarted it from the beginning and turned around to watch your reactions to it. You had started bobbing your head along to the track. Your eyes were closed imagining the concepts that could go with this song. The first thing that came to mind was the Mafia.

The boys had all been watching you for your reactions to it, they had loved being able to witness your first time listening to the track after it was put together. They had always wondered what Atiny had experienced when they listened to their songs for the first time. While they knew you had a mainstream idea of what it would be like, having the instrumentals and not just the vocals made the song something else entirely. As the song ended you opened your eyes and all of them were watching you intently. You felt the blush from earlier creep up the back of your neck and travel to your face. You shrank under their gaze. You couldn't stand them staring into your soul so you thought of the only thing that you could. You pulled up your hood and tightened the drawstrings to close it over your face while sliding down the mirrors slightly. All of the boys looked at eachother and chuckled at your embarrassment.

You could hear a set of footsteps approach you. Peeking through the small hole you had created you saw Yuhno. He grabbed your hands and took them away from the strings of your hoodie; both of your wrists were wrapped in one of his hands as he opened your hood back up. He tilted his head at you. “What’s got you so embarrassed princess, did we make you blush just by looking at you?” Yuhno asked you with a smirk, you looked into his eyes for a brief second and you could see the amusement flickering in them. Your eyes got comically wider and you tried to move to grab your hoodie strings from him but he wouldn't let your wrists go. You felt your blush intensify as you put your head down. He didn't let that last very long as he tilted your head back up to look at him. You couldn't even make eye contact with him, you moved your eyes to look at Toothless who had stood beside him.

The entire moment was interrupted by Beans chirping at the two of you. Both of your heads snapped to look at her and she was sitting and staring at the two of you. Yuhno released your wrists and gently put your hood back down against your shoulders; like he hadn't just practically manhandled you. “Don't hide your pretty face from us again, got it?” You nodded quickly and repressed the urge to cover your cherry red face with your hands. He got up and walked toward the back of the studio to reset the song. You let out a shaky breath you hadn't realized you were holding. You could barely look at any of them, you held your hand up to your chest to feel your erratic heartbeat. The boys had all retreated away from you and got into their beginning places.

Did that just fucking happen?

Holy shit, pretty face?!

He couldn't have been serious right?

He was just messing with you. Right?

You knew that his hands were big but you had never fully taken in how big they were. He could easily hold both of your wrists comfortably. Fuck, that casual show of dominance was kind of hot.

STOP IT, you are here as a professional. They would never be interested in you in that way anyway, right? That just felt like it could have been a possibility.

NO, stop it. You are NOT crushing on these men. With Yuhno’s big hands, Sannie’s broad shoulders, Hongjoong’s gentle touches, Seonghwa’s..

FUCK. NO. Calm down. Be a professional, not an Atiny.

Why not both? Because you could destroy something that you have worked so hard for and something that they have spent a long time building.

DO NOT even consider this, it isn't a possibility, they are just your friends Y/n. Get a fucking grip. You shook your head to clear these thoughts. Mocha was trying to get into your lap by gently putting her paw on your legs. You let them down and she curled up with you. You ran your hand through her soft white fur. You looked around to see Beans sitting in the back chair where the boys prepared the music. She must have gone back while you were internally panicking. Toothless was next to you getting a small drink, when he finished he came over and laid against your leg.

You watched as the boys fell into a professional mode. They had completely immersed themselves in their work, albeit they only had the first half of the dance they drilled it to near perfection. When it came to each of their parts in the center each of them gave you a smile; sometimes it was cute and other times it was demonic. You had fallen into watching their choreography so attentively you hadn't noticed the time passing. Before long they were taking a break, you shifted Mocha off your lap and stood up to go get them water. Some of them were laying on the floor in a big heap and the others were monitoring the recording that had been taking place above your head. You walked out into the other area without most of them noticing you had stepped away. You grabbed eight waters from the small fridge in a breakroom and wandered back and struggled to open the door. Someone must have caught on because soon Yeosang was standing in front of you with the door open. He held a finger up to his lips to make sure you were quiet as you walked into the room. You stepped past him and saw the heep of men on the floor with all of the giants climbing over them. Mocha had settled on Jongho’s chest and he was petting her. Toothless was on Wooyoung’s stomach, he was almost glaring at him while San petted him. Beans was on Yuhno headbutting his face while he giggled. All of them were grunting and giggling as the giants walked across them. You set the water bottles down after handing one to Yeosang and took out your phone to snap a few pictures and maybe a small video. Once you were sure you had enough evidence for blackmail later you picked up the waters and started handing them out. All of them smiled up at you gratefully. After handing all of them out you went to your bag and grabbed the cat laser.

“Watch this,” you said to Yeosang. He had been trailing you like a puppy since you came back into the room. You turned on the little red dot and all of the giants immediately noticed it. Toothless was the first to move leaping off of Wooyoung and to the dot. Wooyoung had let out an indignant screech as he felt all of the weight of Toothless press down onto him to jump. Mocha was next, she had moved over to Mingi from Jongho tracking the dot, she hunkered down before jumping off of him. Mingi grunted and curled onto his side. You laughed a little and before you had looked at Beans you saw her fly off of Yuhno. He burst into a fit of giggles at the jump, it was not nearly as graceful as the other two. She had almost careened into Hongjoong who was sitting by Yuhno. She narrowly avoided him, only because he had scooted out of the way just barely before she ran by. You darted the laser around the room, the giants were sliding around on the wooden floor and the boys were all laughing.

“Sannie, catch.” He whipped around from watching the giants as you tossed the laser to him. San hadn't reacted quite quick enough and you watched in horror as it hit him on the forehead. You covered the bottom half of your face to stifle a laugh. All of the boys immediately dropped to the floor laughing and clapping. San was looking at you with shock and amusement. You couldn't hold back your laughter at the look of mild shock on his face. He got off the floor quickly and sprinted toward you. You let out a squeal before he got to you, he had grabbed you around the waist and picked you up off of your feet. He spun you around in a circle before putting you back down. His next move had completely taken you off guard. He threw you over his shoulders and proceeded to tote you around like Forrest had. You laughed loudly as you smacked him on the back. You heard him laughing, he proceeded to pretend to drop you. You immediately squeaked and gripped onto him for dear life.

“Choi San put me down right now," you demanded. He laughed louder and started skipping around. You could hear the boys laughing in the background. You were hanging on for dear life, when you got enough of your bearings you pushed up off his back and saw Wooyoung. You reached out to him “Woo help me,” He laughed at your pout and shook his head no. You puffed out your cheeks at him. You looked to the next closest member, Jongho.

“Jjong help me!” You pulled your best pout and reached out to him. He looked at you and tilted his head. He looked like he was contemplating his choices. San had almost dropped you again and you yelped. You resigned to your fate putting your head against San’s back.

“Sannie, put me down before I have to resort to extreme measures.” You groaned. You knew how to get out of this hold, but you didn't want to hurt San. So you took a page out of Wooyoung’s book and moved to the side and bit San on the waist. He let out a yelp and Wooyoung barked out a laugh. He had finally lowered you to the ground and held the side you bit. He was looking at you with surprise like he never would have expected that from you.

“I warned you,” you said pointing to him. Wooyoung approached you and offered his hand for a high five. You had motioned to give him one but dodged it at the last second. Jongho snickered at you while you flipped him off. You walked over to mother Seonghwa pouting, he was smiling at you, he knew exactly what you were doing. He opened his arms for you and you immediately walked into them. You turned around to briefly look at the three of them, you stuck your tongue out at them and they all made noises of protest.

“They are bullies,” you said to Hwa quietly. He chuckled at you and squeezed you tighter.

“You will be okay, drama queen. I'm sure you hurt all of their pride.” he mumbled to you. You laughed at his remark. You pulled your head away from his chest and looked at him. He was still smiling at you but something flickered across his eyes, it had disappeared too quickly for you to decipher what it was. You pulled away then. Most of the boys had gone back to playing with the giants and the laser.

“Break time is up, let's get back to it,” Hongjoong said, stepping toward the computer. You had settled down on the floor in your previous spot. Yuhno had tossed the laser back at you and you caught it swiftly. You clicked for the giants to come over to you, Toothless had immediately Mocha a step behind him. Beans was exploring the back of the room, she was too curious for her own good.

“Black Eyed Beans get your fluffy butt over here.” She turned to look at you and waltzed over after contemplating her choices. All of the boys looked at you with confusion, some of them chuckled accepting the interesting name. In all honesty the children at the dojang had helped you come up with names for her. She was the youngest of the three. She was just 9 months old, the Maine Coon breeder had contacted you and made a deal with you to have a kitten if you would take all of their pictures for the business.

“Wait a minute, what did you call her?” Wooyoung asked.

“It's her full name, if you look at her toe beans they are variegated. The children at the dojang helped me come up with the name Black Eyed Beans, or just Beans for short.” She had made it over to you and head butted the hand you held out for her. San’s head whipped around to look at you. Everyone had been distracted by the casual use of Beans’ name.

“Did you just say dojang?” San questioned stepping closer to you. You knew he would freak out about you mentioning the dojang. It had completely slipped your mind that you haven't discussed it with him before.

“Yeah, I have been going to The Black Dragon dojang to practice taekwondo since shortly after I moved here. I started practicing it because I was somewhere I didn't know and lived all by myself. I actually just got upgraded to a third degree black belt and they have let me start helping teach the children.” You replied. His eyes shined with something you couldn't quite place; but it seemed like it was admiration.

“Wah does that mean you are higher ranked than Sannie?” Wooyoung asked, throwing an arm around San’s shoulders. You nodded at him. “She could kick all of our asses. She could have laid you out on your ass earlier but chose not to. She must like you,” he patted San’s chest before walking away. You laughed as his expression shifted from excitement to almost bewildered. He must not have thoroughly processed that fact until Woo had brought it up. Mingi and Yuhno both chuckled.

Wooyoung had popped off with another comment. “She could have kicked your ass earlier too while you were holding her wrists, don't act all big and bad Yuyu.” Yuhno immediately looked at you. You shrugged with a small smirk. He immediately went red, Mingi was laughing in earnest now, his breath coming out in pants.

“Okay, let's get back on track,” Hongjoong said. Some of the boys sighed and went back to their places. You laughed at their sulking expressions. They had begun dancing again and you were enthralled with how in sync they were. This was the first time that you had actually seen them in full professional mode without the dancers helping and critiquing them. They had been working hard on this song and it had really shown. You knew you were scheduled to record the last dance practice for this song after they had put everything together. The music video shoot was getting closer and closer. You were very excited but also nervous for the first time being out in the field with them.

Beans had chirped at you to get your attention. You turned to her and reached out to pet her. Your movement had caught the eyes of the boys. There was a slight competition, if you could even call it that, to see who could hold your attention the longest. It had started out as Wooyoung and San but it had turned into everyone. Mingi’s stomp in the beginning of his rap was what had brought your attention back to them.

You whipped your head back to look at them to see Mingi with a smirk plastered on his perfect face. He had finished his part and winked at you after licking his fingers. You watched as he walked to the side of the room, clearly pleased with himself. You turned your head back just in time to see Hongjoong; he was staring into your soul as soon as he came up in the middle. Your eyes widened at his blatant staring. Wooyoung and San were beside him and were also watching your reaction. The three of them sauntered off and you watched as Jongho took the center of the half circle. By god that man, if he wasn't so focused on his vocals he would be one of the best dancers around. You watched him as he stepped forward to be at the point of the formation. He held your gaze the entirety of his part, it was intense, it was also hot. When he walked away it was Seonghwa’s turn, he had completely changed from the mother hen you were just hugging only a few minutes ago. He was smirking the whole time as he watched your face get even more red. The smooth transitions to San and then Hongjoong had barely registered before Wooyoung was in the center. You could feel the erratic pace of your heart in your ears over the music that was in the background. You had watched with wide eyes as they had come to a stop with the part that they knew.

Wooyoung approached you with an air of confidence. You could feel the heat racing around your body, you instinctively shrunk down just a hair. He crouched in front of you and put his finger under your chin. You hadn't even realized that your mouth had parted while watching the boys. It wasn't nearly as bad as the time Forrest had embarrassed Yeosang your first day, but it was just enough for them to notice.

“If you keep your mouth open like that you’ll catch flies, Y/n-nie.” he whispered just loud enough for you to hear. You went an even deeper cherry red and put your head down as he got up and strutted away. He pulled the same shit you pulled on him. That menace. He asked Yuhno to run it again at a specific mark he felt needed cleaning up.

If that was how they were going to play it you would have to even the playing field. The shirt you had worn under the hoodie was a cropped Ateez black tee, you had grabbed it without thinking or realizing this morning. Originally you had planned to wear it to one of their concerts but each time you had the opportunity to go you couldn’t because of work. You had cut the sleeves off and customized it to have a few rips in it to make it more streetwear like. You wiggled around and took off the hoodie making sure not to completely disturb the giants. You knew this shirt would reveal the bottom half of your lunar moth and the black splatters on your back under Lady Justice. The small dangling piece of jewelry in your belly button would be visible as well. Your sweatpants were not quite high enough to hide their lyrics on your hip above the moon tarot, oh well. You knew the dragon and moon tarot would be peeking through on your hips too. (Tattoos)

Deciding against just sitting there you gently got up avoiding the giants. You started toward the back of the room, the boys were focused on the monitor that they hadn't even noticed you moving around yet. You had perfected the silent walk through many years of practice. Stepping up behind Hongjoong you set your chin on his shoulder and wrapped your arm around him. He jumped not expecting it, you watched as he took in who surrounded before turning to look at you. He smiled at you and looked back at the screen, he seemed to process everything then. He turned to look at you again and his eyes widened slightly before he smirked. You could feel the thoughts churning in his head before reigning himself back in to focus on what Yuhno was saying. You focused in on the computer and your artist's brain had caught that there was a slight difference in where they were standing on either side of the center.

“Is there any particular reason the left side is a little farther away from the center than the right?” All of them slightly jumped not expecting you to be the one who spoke. Everyone but Yuhno had looked at you and some of their eyes widened and Wooyoung choked. Jongho patted him on his back a little harder than he probably needed. You watched as their eyes wandered over you, there was a subtle heat trailing up your back as all of their eyes on you. Focusing all of your willpower you had attempted to quell that feeling. Yuhno turned to look at you and smiled, he seemed to be the most unaffected of the bunch, but you saw the look that flickered across his eyes.

“Good catch, I could tell that there was something off but I didn't know what it was. All we need to do is either tighten it up or make the right side fan out a little more like the left.” He held your eyes the entire time he spoke. You smirked at him.

“Well, from a photographer’s standpoint, if I were to stand in front of you and take the picture, the left side would look better. You can clearly see everyone, while on the right you can't really see Yuyu and Sannie. If you want you can get in that part of the choreo and I can help you adjust the spacing. You spoke to the group of them.

“I think that is a good idea, let's run it again.” You nodded at Yuhno and stepped back from Hongjoong. You waltzed over to your previous spot with a little more of a sway to your hips than normal. What had come over you, you had no idea, but if they could tease so could you. Become the confident bitch you exude to others. You felt all of their eyes wander over you while you walked back to your spot. You turned around to look at them once you got back to where the giants were laying; all of them had a small amount of blush on their features. They started up their music and danced up until Jongho’s part. Jongho was in the center, Yeosang, Seonghwa and Hongjoong were on the left while Mingi, Yuhno, and San were on the right. Wooyoung was in the center hidden behind Jongho.

“Mings, Yuyu, and Sannie. I need you to take a half step to your left,” you held out your arm so they knew without thinking the direction you meant. They did as told and you looked back and forth between the sides. They had been pretty even but you could tell that because of the height of Yuhno and Mingi they would need to be a little different for spacing.

“Sannie and Yuyu, take another quarter step, Mings stay where you are.” The boys had done as told once again. You approached them now to make sure they were in lines with each other to make it cohesive. You went to stand in line with Yeosang and looked at Mingi. You had put your hand on Yeosang and had him take a half step back. He was now in line with Mingi, you did the same with Seonghwa and Hongjoong. Because Mingi and Yuhno are on the same side this side would have to compensate with more space. You walked back behind Wooyoung and looked at the formation from here, it looked pretty good. You looked at Wooyoung who had turned to look at you. You smirked which turned into a full smile when he blatantly looked you up and down. You knew he did it on purpose. You winked at him and walked past making sure to get close enough as you passed that you could brush your hand against his. As you walked you went around the side that San was on. He was a little close to the mirror so you turned to the side and lightly ran your hand along his lower back so you wouldn't lose your balance as you passed him. He turned his head to look at you and you stuck your tongue out at him. You heard him chuckle at you as you kept walking to the front of the room.

“I think this spacing should be good from any standpoint. I would take a look at where you are in reference to the people around you so you can hit these spots again next time.” You watched as they all looked around themselves.

“Thank you for your help! It looks so much better already, we might need to call you in more often!” Yuhno said with a large smile. You returned the smile and watched as they ran it a few more times implementing the spacing change. It wasn’t too long after that you realized it was almost nine. You had been here for just about three hours just watching these incredible men practice. They did not just do the newest choreography either, they ran some of the setlist songs for the tour they knew was coming up. It may have been a few months in advance, but not running something leaves it up or more mistakes later.

“Alright, I think that is enough for the day,” Hongjoong said while wiping his sweat while the rest of the members let out a collective whoop. You smiled as you stretched your arms over your head. You just barely caught Mingi and Wooyoung checking out your tattoos. Thankfully you had turned enough to the side they did not see the lyric tattoo.

“Y/n-nie, you should tell us about your tattoos!” Wooyoung said coming up to you and plopping on the floor in front of you. They all chorused in agreement as they meandered over. They all had plopped down and were looking at you expectantly.

“This is going to be a long winded thing, you know that right?” You raised your eyebrow looking at each one of them.

“We want to get to know you better, the Y/n outside of being a videographer.” Seonghwa piped up

“Okay,” you looked over yourself to see where to even start. Maybe chronological was the best. (Tattoos) “The first one I got was my back piece, it is Lady Justice. I designed it to remind me that she always has my back, no matter what. I grew up in a rough household, my dad was, how do I put this.” You paused contemplating the best way to briefly describe your father. “An abusive raging alcoholic that did not accept me for who I am and who I wanted to be.” You looked at everyone, they all had some kind of look of rage and or sadness lacing their features.

“The second one I got was the sleeve on my right arm.” You held out your arm and let them fully inspect it. “It was something that I came up with right after graduating college for being a videographer. It was a present to myself for getting through school. I also just wanted to be rebellious and create something that I knew my dad would hate. I had to have a little bit of help designing it, I was missing something and the artist did an amazing job.” The boys murmured in agreement as they all leaned in to inspect the tattoo more thoroughly.

“The third was my left arm, I did this one for my love of the ocean. I got it shortly after coming here.” You held out your arm and made sure to show the moon that was in the middle. “It also reminds me that everything has a push and pull to it, that is why the moon is there in the center of it all.” You looked over it and smiled, it reminded you of visiting the beach while you were in college. It had been so freeing to be able to do whatever you wanted and not be restricted by your overbearing father.

“The fourth was the one on my right hip of the dragon on its tower. This one was one that I got on a whim while on a business trip to London. Aurora was being a bad influence and talked me into it. Honestly I love it and am happy I got it. There isn’t really a meaning behind it, it is just more for the aesthetics.” You pulled out your phone and scrolled to the picture you had of it so they could see it properly. You handed the phone to Yeosang who was to your left. Mocha was curled up in his lap and you almost melted at the sight. Jongho who had been sitting next to him leaned in to get a closer look. You watched the interaction with a smile. The boys had passed the phone around and you laughed as Wooyoung exclaimed.

“I want that big of a tattoo! My mother would murder me if I got one though.” He pouted while everyone burst into little fits of laughter at the pout on his face. Once your phone got back to you you scrolled to the picture of your back piece.

“I forgot to show this one earlier.” You handed the phone back to Yeosang and he gently took it from you, your fingers brushed and it almost felt like an electric current passed between the two of you.

“Yahh that is so cool! I cannot believe we haven't seen this one yet with how big it is!” San said, looking at you and back to the screen in front of him. You smiled at him. Your phone made it back to you and you pulled up the moon tarot card.

“This one is the next one, it is the moon tarot card and it is a reminder to face the internal fears I have and that I need to trust my intuition. You watched as Seonghwa’s eyes widened at the tattoo. He held the phone up to his face to get a closer look.

“This one is my favorite so far.” He murmured, passing the phone to Hongjoong. All of the rest had looked at it and some of them were trying to see all of the details of it.

“That one led to the next one, my lunar moth on my stomach. Don't worry, this picture is totally safe and nothing is showing. This one is to symbolize a new beginning. I got this shortly after signing my first contract to work with a big company, which I would later regret, but that's how it goes.” You thought back to the asshole who deleted all of the footage of your project. The boys had passed the phone a little quicker around for this one, you could tell that they were a little embarrassed if the red tinge on San’s face was anything to go by.

“That brings us to the most recent one.” Right now, you did not have the balls to tell them you had a tattoo of their lyrics on you. You pulled your collar to the side just slightly and showed the boys the pawprints just under your collarbone. “This one is by far one of my most precious. These giants have gotten me through some of my worst times.” You looked around to the three who were basking in all of the affection they were getting. Beans with Yuhno and Mingi, Toothless between Seonghwa and San, and Mocha in Yeosang’s lap. The boys had leaned in and looked at your collarbone, some of them were smiling and San was almost shaking with excitement. You could see the ideas fighting for dominance in his brain.

“I need to do that with Byeol!! It would be so cool!” the rest of the members giggled at his enthusiasm. It was endearing how much he loved Byeol.

“I can send you the link to the stamps I used if you want,” you offered readjusting your shirt collar.

"I would love that!" He exclaimed, you looked at how happy he was and noticed that he and Wooyoung were holding hands. He had almost pulled Wooyoung over with how much he was wiggling around. Hongjoong’s phone pinged which startled you. Everyone’s eyes snapped to him while he pulled out his phone.

“The vans are just about here to take us home,” he looked up to everyone and you felt the room deflate a little. You felt bad that you couldn’t spend more time with them outside of work. While you had been getting to know them in more of a professional setting you yearned to be able to see them outside of being idols.

“How about this, I know you guys do not have much spare time, but I know we have some time after the MV shoot. So what would you think about us getting together at my house for a couple of days after? I live out in the middle of nowhere so you wouldn't have to worry about people. I have spare rooms and I know you would love it. Generally I am the party host so I have all the fun things. There is a full bar, a pool table, an air hockey table, a foosball table, a ping pong table, tons of console games, a karaoke machine and a pool.” You watched everyone perk up at the thought. Wooyoung started to bounce around like a little kid much like San was earlier. San fed off the energy at the mention of a pool. Jongho had perked up at the mention of a full bar and pool table. Yuhno and Mingi were looking at each other at the mention of the console games.

“I think that would be so much fun, count us in!” Seonghwa smiled at you and you could see that the happiness of everyone else. Hongjoong nodded and checked his phone again.

“They’re here.” Hongjoong was the first to get up, followed shortly after by Seonghwa and the rest of the boys. Mingi who was the closest to you had helped you up. Yeosang had looked at you pitifully because he didn’t want to disturb Mocha. You chuckled and squatted to grab her out of his lap. She made a noise of protest and everyone cooed at her. You looked back down to Yeosang and noticed that he was covered in fur. You cuddled her for a second before putting her down and grabbing the leashes. Beans and Toothless approached you and rubbed on your legs. You clipped all of them up and cleaned up your small set up before looking back to the boys who were lingering.

“Could one of you hold these while I put my hoodie back on?” Jongho had been the one to step up first, he held a hand out and you passed him the leashes. You quickly grabbed your hoodie and threw it back on being careful to not expose the lyrics. God if they had seen it you would never hear the end of it. Once you had completed your task you threw the cat bag over your shoulder and took the leashes back from Jongho. Smiling at him you thanked him and wrapped your arm around his as you started walking with the rest of the boys. He looked at you briefly and you caught the ghost of a smile on his lips. Once you got out to the parking garage he didn’t let go of you like you thought he would, he kept walking with you to your car. You grabbed your keys out of the hoodie pocket and unlocked it. He opened the back door for the giants and they all jumped in.

“Thank you, Jjong,” you said looking at him. He smiled and did what you thought was unthinkable for him. He pulled you into a hug, it wasn’t awkward like you had imagined it to be, it seemed more intimate than anything. Your brain short circuits just a second before you wrap your arms around him and close your eyes. You instinctively leaned into him. This was the closest you had ever been to him, he had a strong build. You could feel his gentle breath across the back of your neck as he tucked himself into you farther. This was the kind of hug you had always craved, something that was so gentle but strong that could heal you in just a few moments. You let him control the length of the hug but it seemed like he didn’t want to let go. You knew the others couldn’t see you, that may have been why he had actually let himself do this. They may have been in a relationship but you knew that it was hard for someone to open up if it was so deeply engraved into them like it is for him.

“Yah, come on let's go apple boy” you heard someone shout. He jumped and took a step back from you immediately. You saw the look of horror cross his face. You reached out to him and grabbed his hand as you spoke.

“Jongho, it’s okay, I loved the hug, you are more than welcome to do that with me wherever and whenever. Any contact that is similar is up to you, I know you can be uncomfortable with it sometimes so I will let you lead if you so desire.” You watched as his face relaxed, he gave your hand a squeeze before saying a quiet goodbye. You reached out and closed the door as you watched him walk away. Walking to the other side of the car you got into the driver's seat and leaned your head against the headrest. You put your hand up to your chest to ground yourself, the erratic beat of your heart started to settle. Your heart almost couldn’t handle today, you let out a loud sigh before starting up Aria. Time to head home and overthink everything that happened.

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

Next Chapter (Chapter 9)

Taglist:

@breadedloafs @a-short-ass-disappointment @ateezswonderland @staytinyluv @cherryangel-coke @11glitch11 @neivivenaj @herpoetryprincess @premverse @starryjoong-jeongcheollie

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zepskies · 10 hours ago

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Here are some of my favorites! (A revamp of my old rec list.) They will span Tumblr, Ao3, and FF.net, as I did a lot of my early reading/writing on other platforms.

Keep in mind, I probably like several fics from each of these authors, but I'm featuring one or two that I very much enjoyed.

SUPERNATURAL FIC RECS

[OS] = One-Shot || [S] = Series || [HC] = Headcanon

Dean Winchester x Reader or OFC:

Stories are Dean x Reader unless noted OFC.

✦ Alisha Ashton

Clear the Area - [S | Excellent 4-part series!] This is the story of you and Dean, and how he manages to slip past your defenses. Written so that you can put yourself in the OC's shoes. Sorta set end S8. Slightly AU in the fact that Dean, Sam, Castiel, Kevin, and YOU all live in the MOL Bunker. Everyone is healthy. Cas is still an adorably clueless angel with zero tact.

✦ @luci-in-trenchcoats

Feral [S] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) Feral is an Alpha’s most dangerous state. Pure raw instinct. A killing machine with no thought. Only an Alpha under extreme duress can submit to their feral side and they rarely can come back out of it. It takes highly specialized rehabilitation to even have a chance at working. When a feral Alpha comes into the reader’s low level rehab facility one night, she knows he’s a dead man walking. But he doesn’t deserve to die and a split second decision to help him escape before that can happen will put them both on the run. He’s no ordinary Alpha though. He’s Dean Winchester. The boy who went missing all those years ago. The boy that made everyone realize no one was safe from the Alpha black market. The man that could destroy them both with one wrong move…

Headcanon: How They Meet Their Plus Size Girlfriend (Dean Winchester, Beau Arlen, Soldier Boy, and Russell Shaw included)

✦ @deanbrainrotwritings

Wild Flower [OS] Dean gets hit by a spell when fighting a witch and assumes it was harmless or ineffective. He was wrong, but at least he wasn’t dead. He’s a woman now.

✦ @waynes-multiverse

Creature of the Night [OS] When her car breaks down on a dark lonely road, she is lucky a handsome stranger takes her in. Grateful, she is willing to do anything to repay his kindness.

Headcanon: Valentine's Day (Dean Winchester // Soldier Boy // Beau Arlen // Russell Shaw – Edition) How would your favorite men surprise you for Valentine's Day?

Headcanon: Gettin’ Down and Dirty with Dean Smutty headcanons with Dean...

✦ @rizlowwritessortof

Take a Shot [OS] Let’s face it, his henley looks good on both of you…

Late Night Show [OS] You’re spending a little down time at Bobby’s when HE shows up with his brother. You try to ignore those old feelings for him, but when you accidentally walk in on him pleasuring himself, all bets are off.

Lost in You [OS] A casual flirtation leads to a violent encounter, and Dean’s reaction is a little more than you expected.

That’s How It Should Be [OS] (Sheriff!Dean x Reader) Sheriff Dean Winchester/Reader have to escape, quick - but Dean won’t let being on horseback stand in the way of showing a lady a good time…

✦ @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior

The First Time Series [S] Even though he's a lot older than she is, and more experienced in every possible sense, Y/N finds herself incredibly attracted to Dean Winchester. Amazingly, one day she starts to think that maybe the attraction isn't all one-sided.

The Dangers of Hope [S | Endverse!Dean] When Y/N shows up at Camp Chitaqua with her little girl in tow, her bloodshot eyes leave no doubt that she's infected. Or is she? Everything Dean has come to know for certain over the last five hellish years, is about to be challenged.

It's All For You [OS] After a hunt gone wrong, all Y/N wants is to make Dean feel better. Will he let her?

Things Learned and Unlearned [S] Y/N has spent her life trying to outrun her mother's reputation. When she meets the rich and successful playboy, Dean Winchester, how quickly can he get her to stop running?

✦ Lindsey D. Perez

Say I'm Beautiful [OS] You're feeling a little self conscious about your weight so Dean decides to show you how sexy you are. Dean x Reader Warning: negative body image, swearing Rated M for smut so go forth with caution.

✦ @ejlovespie

It Ain't About Pity [OS] (Dean x Plus-Size!Reader) Dean Winchester has eyes for the reader. She has no idea. When he finally figures out why she’s been dieting, he isn’t pleased.

✦ kittenofdoomage

More to Love [OS] (Alpha!Dean x Plus-Size Omega!Reader) Reader is a hunter, and an Omega, an unusual combination. She’s always been mocked for her size, so she keeps to herself but a case Garth persuades her to take ends up with a confrontation she never saw coming.

Never Spoken, Always Said [OS] He doesn’t say the words much but he shows her every day.

Taste [S] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) The reader is pregnant with Dean's baby. Spanning the first year or so, we join them as they discover new things about each other.

✦ @impala-dreamer

A Simple Kinda Man Dean’s a pretty simple man. He likes the things he likes and you can rarely get him to change his mind about it.

Like Heaven (Dean x Curvy!Reader) Y/N’s request might throw him off for a second, but he’s never going to deny her, not when it feels so good in her arms…

✦ @justagirlinafandomworld

Remind Me [OS] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) There was no escaping what happened to you. There wasn’t a magical number of days in which you would simply get over it either. It happened and you had to live with it. But your alpha would never leave you to work through it alone.

Delicate Dean made you feel things no one else ever had. But is it a good idea to see this through?

The Fallout (Alpha!Dean x Beta!Reader) [S] When Sam meets his true Omega, you fear your time with the Winchesters is fated to end. Before they can hurt you, you decide to distance yourself. But Dean isn’t willing to let you get away so easy.

✦ @spnbabe67

Girls, Girls, Girls [OS - Part of a Series] (Dean x OFC) While on a witch hunt Dean gets hit with a spell. Later at the hotel, Dean feels the effects of the spell and Tori has to help him through it.

✦ @chevroletdean

NSFT Alphabet [Dean Winchester] [HC]

Masturbation [Dean Winchester] [HC]

✦ @thatonewriter15

Unspoken [OS] How many reasons are there to love Dean Winchester...?

✦ @iprobablyshipit91

Twenty Minutes or Less [OS] Dean raises an eyebrow at you, cocky smile firmly in place. "I bet I could get you there in twenty minutes or less.”

Magical Blooms [OS] After all, there was a flurry of customers walk through the doors to Magical Blooms each and every day, and quite a number of these were regulars. Just because one of those regulars was an undeniably gorgeous man that flirted shamelessly...

✦ @jawritter

Feral (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) [S] True mates don't exist, at least that's what everyone tells you. It's nothing but a childish, fairytale notion to believe that such a person exists. Someone that is made just for you, your person. Who knew they were so wrong…

✦ @marvelfanfn2187a113

Here For You (Dean x Little Sister!Reader) [OS] You help Dean through a couple different kinds of pain.

✦ @deanwinchesterswitch

The Girlfriend Who Remade Christmas [S] Dean’s holiday spirit is nowhere to be found. Fed up with his Grinch-like behavior, Nicole is determined to open his heart again to the wonders of the world around them and help him find joy in the Christmas season.

✦ @spnexploration

Collared [S] Sam and Dean save a woman from where she has been held as a slave by a witch. But things turn dark whenever they try to take her magic collar off, leaving them with a slave to look after and a curse to break.

✦ @kaleldobrev

Old Man [OS - Part of a Series] Dean never had a problem with the age gap between you two; not until now any way.

✦ @deanwritings

Friends with Benefits [S] After walking in on Y/N following a fun encounter, Dean and Y/N decide it would be beneficial and much easier to use each other for their needs. But can they keep it just about sex?

✦ @waywardxwords

Safe [OS] You had hoped to get in and out when you heard what town the next hunt was in. Unfortunately, you can’t outrun your past. You, also, can’t outrun those old feelings--panic, anxiety and fear. You had hoped you’d never have to share this part of your life with Dean, but things don’t always work out the way we had hoped.

Witches [OS] While hunting a witch, you accidentally stumble upon her collection of sex pollen.

✦ @acreativelydifferentlove

Carry On [S] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) You’re an Omega in a small rural town. When your father’s gambling and drinking leaves him with a debt he can’t afford to pay, he offers you to a group of Alphas. Dean Winchester is an Alpha desperately trying to escape his past and pain. Can you save each other?

You're Home [S] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) After years away at college, you have finally returned to your home town. In order to settle back into the community, you have to seek permission from the Head Alpha. What happens when you see his son for the first time since presenting as an Omega?

✦ @deanwanddamons

Helping Hand [OS] Dean is tired after a hunt, so asks Sammy to drive Baby. You and Dean cuddle up in the back seat.

✦ @mind-empty-just-fictional-people

Love Language [OS] You’ve never said it, neither has he…is that weird?

✦ @pink-sparkly-witch

The Widow [S] Sam and Y/N are happily married, but everything changes after a fatal car accident leaves her a widow. The Winchester motto: “Family Don’t End with Blood,” takes on a whole new meaning for Y/N as she navigates her new normal with the help of her brother-in-law, Dean. But what no one can tell her is what happens when she falls in love again.

✦ shirleypositive72

While They Dance On A Pin (Jane Series 5) [OS - Part of a Series] (Dean x OFC) Sam, Dean, and Jane have been on the road almost constantly since Dean's return from Hell. They're finding Seals, finding danger, finding out each other's secrets. But it's what they find when they open the door to one more motel room that sends Dean back into his darkest moments. An OC's experience of episode 4x16, On the Head of a Pin.

✦ BeccabooO1O

She's My Cherry Pie [OS] Dean was drunk. So terribly drunk. And it was hilarious. Just some karaoke!Dean (aka the best Dean of them all).

✦ @pamwritessometimes

Roots in My Dreamland [OS] Dean encounters a mysterious forest spirit who’s an enigma.

✦ @supernotnatural2005

Sexual Encounters with Dean Winchester - Edging Exploring new kinks with Dean. How far can you push him before he breaks?

Happy Accidents (Dean x Plus-Size!Reader) You haven't seen the Winchester's in over a year, but the case you're working has you scratching your head, and who better to call than some old friends. However, insecurities arise as well as the reprise of a long time crush. Little do you know, it's reciprocated.

✦ @ambiguous-avery

When He Slides In And says “Fuck, I missed you.” After a hookup with the (in)famous Dean Winchester, you figured that would be the end of it. Too bad you could never seem to get him out of your mind. People always told you that you got attached too easily. And they were right. You were just another notch in his belt. He couldn’t possibly remember you...

✦ @bettystonewell

To You I Belong [S] (Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader) Dean isn’t looking for a mate. Not only does he think he doesn’t deserve one, but the last place he expects to meet his soulmate is while on a case. Fate ain’t real. He still has free will, and saving you from monsters is just another part of the job.

Another Notch on His Belt [OS] Every little part of him is holding onto every little piece of her, and any other woman he’s been lucky enough to escape his life with. Even if it’s only for the night - or - Dean replaces intimacy with sex.

✦ @lamentationsofalonelypotato

It's Not a Big Deal [S] (Dean x Reader x Soldier Boy/Ben love triangle) Dean's in for a rude awakening when he finds out exactly what you did when you got stranded in another universe.

Dean Winchester x Lisa Braeden:

✦ adventuresinposting

Damages [S] Ben is in a car accident causing a fractured skull. Consequentially he remembers Dean. Ben tries to find Dean, who is now a retired hunter after losing Sam in a final battle. This is the story of Dean finding something and someone to replace the hole in his life left by Sam.

✦ FaithDaria

One Step at a Time [OS] The Winchester way of life changes, and Dean adjusts accordingly.

✦ bloodmagik

A Dad By Any Other Name [OS] Ben is sick and Dean stays home with him while Lisa is at work. Lisa learns something about Dean's relationship with Ben.

Sam Winchester x Reader or OFC:

Stories are Sam x Reader unless noted OFC.

✦ Avrilando

While You Were Sleeping - [S] (Sam x OFC) A seriously injured unconscious man is in the hospital Rachel volunteers. With no idea who he is and if anyone is looking for him, Rachel decides to keep him company while he's sleeping. With The Eyes of a Loving Man [S] (Sequel to While You Were Sleeping) Continuing through Sam and Rachel's relationship with all the highs and lows of dating a hunter. Mostly a collection of oneshots and some connecting stories.

✦ Lindsey D. Perez

It's Your Birthday [OS] The Winchester's find out it's your birthday and insist on celebrating with lots of alcohol. Sam introduces you to body shots and things get heated.

If You Give a Moose a Muffin [OS] ...he'll want kisses to go with it.

✦ ALoversDream

All of Me [OS] (Sam x Plus-Sized!Reader) Request where the reader (even thought she's usually pretty confident) is slightly insecure about her looks, and because she's plus-size. It ends in fluffy weight smut.

✦ BeccabooO1O

Could Have Told You That One, Winchester [OS] Imagine sitting one Sam's lap while you two are researching. She was reading one of the books about mythology for the Winchester's current case when she heard a frustrated groan from across the table. Sam Winchester had his laptop in front of him and various books of lore scattered around it.

✦ @princessmisery666

Samnesia [S] (Sam x OFC) Brooke is a calming distraction from the chaotic mess of Sam’s life. When a hunt keeps them separated for over a month, Sam returns to find she no longer remembers him. The need to find out what happened while he was gone sends Sam on a case that will change the course of his life. What he discovers along the way will change the way he looks at love.

✦ @ohsc

Delicate [OS] Sam being intimate with an inexperienced reader.

**I will keep adding to this list as I read and explore! Please reblog the fics you read and let these amazing authors know what you thought of their work. 💜

I have several more stories favorited on my FF.net account. (Beware if you try to read any of the stories I wrote there though. Some of those are old as hell and not to my current standard. 🤣)

Dean Winchester AU Fic Rec List

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ecoustsaintmein · 3 days ago

Text

ghosts (part v of v) - or is it?????

part i here

part ii here

part iii here

part iv here

writing playlist here

pairing: paddy x eoin; eric love (starred up) x killian (angel)

rating: E. slow burn.

this was the first time they'd had this conversation as eric and killian. but it was as if they'd had this conversation, many years ago, many times before.

(or, paddy mayne and eoin mcgonigal, reincarnated as eric love from 'starred up' and killian from 'angel'. they meet again, during the heights of the pandemic -- but they don't remember - until much, much, much later).

the buzz, the ache, the heaviness in his head is gone. he feels lighter. it's as if paddy has loosened his grip on eric, but there's still that faint humming; a warning that he musn't fuck this up. or else.

or else what?

he's got free rein of his destiny, now. his limbs are his own. his voice is his own. his thoughts of killian--

they're also his own.

but what does that make him now?

in this light, he watches killian sleep next to him. peaceful.

a fragment of paddy's memory does flash in eric's mind then. of paddy seeing eoin's body, partially buried in that makeshift grave. eyes shut. unmoving. pale.

cold.

dead.

eric shakes his head to clear his thoughts. focuses on killian, who is there, instead of eoin, who is not there.

killian, who is warm and alive and open and trusting and sensitive and soft and yet -- he could be hard and unyielding and sharp and cutting when he needs to be.

eric shifts on the bed, snuggles closer to killian. comforted by the rise and fall of killian's breathing. he's alive, eric thinks. and he's here.

this is killian's bed. cu chulainn's bed. the bed that he's always seen in those videos, from many months before. he doesn't have the guts to tell killian that he knows. the secret shames him, but it also excites him.

eric doesn't want to leave, because then the fantasy will be over. what will happen to them now?

he reaches over and runs his fingertips over the palm of killian's hand. killian stirs, turns his head around and opens one eye into a slit. squints sleepily at eric. he closes his eyes again, but his lips curve into a soft, lazy smile. tightens his fingers around eric's, the way eoin's never did, in that last moments in the desert.

eric doesn't want to let go.

hot tears form in his eyes despite his herculean efforts, of willing himself to blink them away.

fuck, he thinks. we've really, really made it worse.

'eric?'

'kill?'

'we have to wake up.'

'mm. five more minutes.'

eric could hear killian snickering, his fingers stroking eric's hair. he couldn't see killian from this angle, but he knows killian's close. he could feel the heat of killian's body behind him, pressed against his back. killian's just gotten out of the shower. eric knows this, because he smells of that fresh fancy shower gel that always makes eric go nuts. pavlovian, almost, the way it makes him yearn. the way his body snaps to attention when he's aware that killian is near. killian smells good. always has.

against his better judgment, he takes a sharp, deep breath and turns his head into killian's chest. breathes him in deeper. the scent of him in his lungs. he wishes he could trap it there forever. if that's the last thing he'll ever do.

'it's been five minutes ten minutes ago,' killian complains. eric could feel the throaty rumble of killian's voice against his cheeks; imagines his pout.

he wants to kiss it away.

eric sighs into killian's shirt; an old tattered football kit from an irish division two club he's never heard of. 'time is relative,' eric mumbles. the grip on his hair slightly tightens, and eric feels the blood rushing straight to his dick.

'ha,' is killian's only reply. fingernails grazing his scalp, gentle, then a sudden jerk of his hair. not painful-- just enough to make eric gasp. how is killian so normal about all of this? he wonders.

the tears threaten to spill again. eric couldn't let killian see. he gulps, eyes tightening shut, rubbing his face against killian's shirt desperately. the tell-tale signs of an ugly sob coming on -- the heaviness in his belly, getting pulled up, up, up into his chest and into his throat. this isn't like when he's nearly died and neville saved him. this is something completely different, and yet he feels so vulnerable and he hates the way it makes him feel, the way that killian has his life in his hands and yet eric trusts that killian will be kind to him. because he's never trusted anyone, not like this, not ever.

'i don't want to get out of bed,' eric whispers, guttural. meaning: i don't want to have to leave you.

killian holds him closer, presses a soft kiss on the crown of his head. eric looks up, then, red eyes brimmed with tears and killian brushes them away. he kisses eric's forehead, then: the tip of eric's nose. each eyelid. the bottom of his chin. catches eric's bottom lip with his own, coaxes him into another deep, lingering kiss. eric sits up then, straddling killian's lap.

killian carrying his weight.

killian swallowing every sob, every hiccup.

they stay like this until killian's legs go numb and they have to change positions so that killian could straighten his legs again, eric sitting in between them.

they pull apart, reluctantly, then:

'there is a fragrance in your kiss that i have not found yet in the kisses of women or the honey of their bodies,'

killian begins, suddenly, out of the blue.

'lad of the grey eyes that flush in thy cheek would be white with dread of me could you read my secrets.'

he recites this to himself, to eric, to nobody at all. eric listens, and he wonders -- is killian talking about himself, when he talks about secrets?

about cu chulainn?

is he scared of eric finding out, what eric would think of him?

what will happen to us now? eric asks.

i don't know, killian says. but we can take it slow. we can figure it out. i'm not going to leave you.

i don't plan on leaving, eric concurs.

then we can work it out together, killian grins, like there's no care in the world.

won't we?

eric's seen that q&a video where killian has replied to one of the subscribers, who's asked if killian's seeing someone. his brain shortcircuited the moment killian opened his mouth, because that response was killian and not cu chulainn, with that thick cork accent, not a hint of him even trying to hide it.

the chat blew up then, but killian had ignored the comments about his sudden accent switch. it was as if killian purposely answered that specific question as himself, and not cu chulainn the performer.

eric's gotten riled up watching it, because, fuck. who is this boy that killian's talking about, the one who was so near and yet so far? surely not eric. surely not him. the video was posted just after he'd bumped into that kcl posho matt, who killian said he's not seen in ages. could it have been matt instead?

eric wanted answers, and he immediately thought:

'do I dare disturb the universe? in a minute there is time for decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.'

eric's always been impulsive. but he also didn't want to give himself away. in the separate dm chat with cu chulainn, which he'd stubbornly ignored since killian sent him the voice notes with the poems that sliced through him, he feverishly typed:

'i hate and I love. why I do this, perhaps you ask. i know not, but i feel it happening and i am tortured.'

he'd shut his laptop, then. pushed it away. thought nothing more of it. he's getting good at being cryptic, the way paddy had been.

but then that afternoon killian had asked if they should fuck.

cryptic, my arse, he thought.

eighteen hours later, they did fuck.

fuck all good did it do them.

i hate and i love, he thinks. i am tortured, he thinks.

but now, he's here. they're in the shower together and killian's lathering shampoo on his hair and eric's scrubbing the lime shower gel on killian's skin and he's never felt more content.

they're able to touch each other without thinking about shagging all the time, now, which -- okay, so that part's been fucked out of their system. but this is a different kind of intimacy that eric's never shared with anyone.

in some ways it's made things worse, because what are they now?

i hate and i love, he thinks. i am tortured, he thinks.

killian's still texting matt, sometimes. he tells this to eric straight, and eric doesn't tell him, no, 'you can't see him.' but he still wonders, who is matt to killian?

who am i?

he looks around killian's flat. eric's parka is hanging there, at the corner of the room. his jeans in killian's laundry basket. eric's come to killian's flat once and found him darning the holes in eric's socks. he still doesn't know where killian keeps his cu chulainn paraphernalia, and eric doesn't want to snoop.

he returns to his own flat and there is killian's guitar, lying on the sofa. killian's books strewn on the floor. his st christopher's medal, on eric's bedside table.

eric smells like killian's soap bar.

killian's wearing eric's baggy shirt.

they walk to work in the mornings, like nothing else has changed.

christmas is a muted affair.

turns out killian's a lapsed catholic and he doesn't go to church let alone observe mass. mrs sinha ends up making a very non-traditional christmas feast (chicken ruby, black daal, chicken biryani) and eric thinks, fuck christmas and turkey and minced pies and potatoes, this is the actual good shit right here.

killian's still waxing lyrical about the different kinds of potatoes in ireland, though, and how the english ones are shite. so mrs sinha allows him to make his special roasted potatoes which actually goes well with the chicken ruby sauce.

khushi whispers to killian that she's confessed to the girl she's got a crush on, sabrina, and that they're now officially together. eric asks, does your mum know?

yeah, khushi says, when mrs sinha is bringing food out of the kitchen and killian helps her out. she's completely ok with it, she says. apparently both khushi and mrs sinha are fans of 'love actually' and got the idea of khushi learning the guitar to impress sabrina, by christmas, from that film. eric stares at mrs sinha then, thinking, i wish i had a mum like her. i wish that i had been as free as khushi. things would have been easier.

then eric stares at killian, thinking, i've got nothing to impress you with.

they exchange gifts.

mrs sinha and khushi got an indian cookbook for killian, and a new fjallraven kanken backpack for eric to replace the manky, tattered old jansport one that he's got currently.

killian, eric and mrs sinha saved up to buy khushi a new guitar instead of a second-hand one that she's been using, and a drumkit. she's chuffed, beyond the moon.

killian says to eric, i've got something for you, but it's not here.

eric says, me too.

i've got vouchers for a trip to belfast, killian says. he doesn't want to plan anything, he says, lest eric doesn't want to go, for whatever reason. killian tells eric that he does want to go -- to bury the ghosts of paddy and eoin once and for all.

this is the first time they've spoken openly about the dead souls that had been haunting them, since they fucked.

they've not fucked since, but it doesn't mean that eric doesn't want to. and he knows killian knows this too.

eric could sense paddy, just floating, simmering underneath his skin. curious as to how eric's going to play this out. as if saying, 'the choice is all yours, sweetpea. it's up to you now.'

eric bites the bullet and says yes.

yes, he says. i'll come with you.

killian's first reaction when he sees his christmas gift for the first time is one of absolute joy. then disbelief. a twinge of horror, perhaps, from the way he looks at it and then back up at eric and back at it.

eric's stomach does drop, then, blood leaving his face and rushes to his feet. absolute fear that killian's really, really seen through him now. knows who he is.

what he's done.

withers yips.

and yips.

killian picks up the dog and coos at it, hugging it close to his chest and scratches its head. 'withers,' he says, and blinks at eric. withers yips again, then makes a sad noise when killian stops stroking him. eric's never seen killian cry, but there are proper tears running down his cheeks, now.

'merry christmas?' eric asks, uncertain. he tries to be glib about it all, but he thinks he's failing thoroughly. like when he had to give a presentation during mrs thompson's english class and everyone was laughing at him.

but killian's not laughing at him now.

'how did you know?' killian mouths silently.

eric shrugs. pretends he hasn't seen that video where killian's literally said he wanted a dog and has a fondness for strays.

fervently hopes killian doesn't find out about who user @/blaire_e is. and eric thinks:

'lad of the grey eyes that flush in thy cheek would be white with dread of me could you read my secrets.'

it's not just you, killian, who has secrets.

later, eric says: 'kill, i've got something to tell you.'

'hmm?'

but the words are stuck in his throat.

he wants to say, i'm blair, i've always known who you were, this was how i knew about you wanting a dog and your deepest, darkest desires.

but he's a coward.

instead, he says:

'maybe the reason why they didn't get together was so that we could. maybe the reason why we're here is to give them closure. maybe it's not just them that needs it but also us,' all in one breath.

killian looks at him. really looks at him. as if to say, 'i see you. i know you. if only you'll let me hold up a mirror to you so you can see yourself too.'

they are sticky and filthy from come and sweat but eric doesn't care. they'd promised to each other that they won't fuck again until they've properly figured this out, having established that their decisions are no longer being driven by paddy and eoin.

but then they picked up withers from battersea and something definitely shifted in the air between them, after.

eric's headed straight for the showers without a word.

he scrubbed at his skin, washed his hair, lathered himself with soap and water – letting the hot water spray all over him, draining his sins away.

he closed his eyes, before sliding down against the shower wall and sat down in his shower cubicle while the shower spray was still on. he pulled his knees up to his chest, and shuddered at the thought of being shunned if killian were to find out how long he'd known about cu chulainn.

his dick still twitched at the thought of killian -- not of killian as eoin, or killian as cu chulainn. but killian as killian. he lowered his hand to his groin, wrapping his hand around it, before stroking in earnest. he hadn't even realized that killian's knocked on the bathroom door.

'eric?'

he'd thought about straightening up, about stopping – but he’d been too far gone. eric let out a moan as the pressure on his cock intensified, as he increased the speed at which his hand was moving.

'you alright in there?'

killian's voice hadn't helped at all. not good. eric bit his lips to cover his groans, but then he decided, what's even the fucking point. he shut his eyes tightly, rivulets of water trickling over his stiff cock. head hung low as he fucked his own fists. his groans became louder. obscene.

killian yanked the shower curtains open just in time as eric began to come. killian didn't even budge, or had the sense to be surprised. instead, he just stood there, hand gripping the wet shower curtains. 'withers's asleep now,' he'd said expressionlessly. as if eric hadn't just came in front of him, hissing killian's name on eric's lips.

killian tilted his head, lips pursed. 'does it feel good, eric?'

eric moved his hand away from his limp cock. lifted up his face, to look at killian. cheeks burning from the heat of the shower, but not the shame building inside of him. 'it felt amazing, yeh,' he replied. nonchalant.

a beat, then --

'right on then,' killian said, stripping down and joining him under the shower. 'kill—,' eric warned, before killian leaned down and kissed him, ardently, as if saying, i know. i know. i know who you are.

but eric hadn't dared ask the question. so he let killian manhandle him inside the crowded shower stall. he could feel killian hardening against his thighs. his own cock began to stiffen. he lets himself be kissed again and again.

the slippery floor really didn’t make them great friends with gravity. in their struggle to put their hands on each other, eric managed to lose his footing and stumbled on his arse, pulling killian on top of him in the process.

killian laughed, hard, then. it echoed through the tiles of the bathroom, ringing sweetly in eric's ears. 'i just wanted to have a shower with you. of course you had to try to kill us both in the process,' he said, with a cheeky fucking grin, and reached down to pump them both together. 'you're such hard work,' he said, but there was no malice in his words. 'i never know what to make of ya, eric love.'

'keeps it interesting, innit? life can't be straightforward all the time, yeah?' eric managed to say breathlessly -- as he thrusted harder into killian's hand.

'you keep doing my head in,' killian huffed. 'how did you even know that i wanted a dug for christmas? surely paddy's ghost didn't tell you that?'

eric couldn't help but let out a grunt as he arched his hip forward, craving more of killian's touch. ignored the jab, the pointed question about the dog. 'i'm doing your head in? you're the one doing my head in,' he burst out, as killian continued to torment him with the way that he was using his hands. 'from the moment you turned up with that awful accent and that hair, yeah?' eric began, to which killian tutted, 'ah, but you adore my accent.' eric chuckled, and groaned at the same time, before resuming his rant:

'and you just swanned in quoting wilfred fucking owen, and getting me to do shite i've never done in my life before,' eric said, as killian watched his filthy mouth whine about all the allegedly terrible things killian's made him do. he increased his speed, moving faster, harder, and eric thought he could see stars, the way that killian's flicking his wrist, the friction, the pressure, the thought that they were going to come together. 'do this, he grunted, as killian panted against his mouth, hand frantic. thumb against the slit of eric's cock. 'go there,' eric hissed. 'try this indian food. watch this fucking boring black and white movie from the 1940s. don't fall in love with ya though i'm completely hung up on ya'.

killian's gazed up sharply, into eric's eyes, then.

there was only silence. there was only their breathing, heavy, against each other's skin.

they came, and they came hard. together.

killian wiped his hand on the towel next to him. he looked down at eric, gentle, fond. a drop of water from killian's wet curls fell onto eric's bottom lip, and he licked it away. their gazes never left each other. eric watched the way killian watched him, and his heart raced faster, as if it could leap out of his ribcage at any minute, the way it fluttered frantically against his chest.

'i've done all those things you said i did, and i don't regret them one bit,' killian said, placing a hand on eric's heart. 'but i've never told you not to fall in love me.'

killian says, i've seen a hanging. and then, he says, i've tried to kill someone.

eric says, i've tried to kill people. and then, he says, people's tried to hang me.

killian kneels by him, fingertips tracing eric's throat, the bump of his adam's apple. as if tracing where the ropes would have marked eric.

never again, killian says.

never again, eric concurs.

he opens his dm and finds another voice note from cu chulainn, as a reply to his 'i hate and i love' message.

this time, killian's reads it fully in his native, irish accent, instead of an english one:

'in scenery i like flat country. in life i don’t like much to happen. in personalities i like mild colourless people. and in colours I prefer grey and brown.

my wife, a vivid girl from the mountains, says, “then why did you choose me?”

mildly I lower my brown eyes— there are so many things admirable people do not understand.'

eric plays it again, and again, again. just to hear the rolls of killian's 'r's and the fullness of his vowels.

tries to ignore what killian's trying to say. and why killian's read it as killian and not cu chulainn.

because, surely not.

surely not.

the last thing eric would have suspected from killian is another cu chulainn video, posted two nights later.

someone's asked him to complete a challenge, to shoot a video in a new place, out of his usual room setup. eric knows that the intention behind the challenge was for cu chulainn to do a solo video somewhere public, like in a park, or in a car -- somewhere that is not killian's bedroom. something outrageously kinky.

eric thinks, this could be interesting. until he realizes where killian is, in the video. and what he's doing.

eric lets out a loud, 'fuck.'

'i'm here,' video-killian says, though eric still can't see his face. but he recognizes the spartanness of the flat. it's eric's place.

it's eric's fucking living room.

it's where they'd fucked at least twice, on that sofa that killian's sitting on. some of the come stains are probably still visible, even through the grainy pixels.

'it's still indoors, but i'll tell you why i chose this place.' killian''s speaking with his normal irish accent, instead of an english accent.

eric panics. when did killian record the video? was it when eric had gone out with withers, for a walk around tooting? and then he'd come home and killian had made dinner?

'i chose this place because this person means something to me. i spend a lot of time here. i can truly be myself, here. with him. i never told him how i felt, because i couldn't. but i think -- sometimes -- he can tell what i'm thinking, what i'm feeling. even if we don't have the words for it.'

killian's stripped down and touched himself. 'for the past few months, when i'm doing these videos, i've been thinking of him. so, la reine d'algerie,' he sighs, 'you're right. i've sort of been seeing someone. good spot,' he chuckles, but there was no humour there -- only a sense of burden and guilt and conflict. bittersweet. 'but i think you've always known that it's going to happen, don't you, eve?'

eric watches in horror. this is not cu chulainn. this is purely, and openly, and honestly, killian. what remains of the last vestiges of his anonymity is the headless shot of the camera. 'i think i love him. i think i'm in love with him--,'

eric shuts his laptop and throws it on the floor.

an interlude:

two weeks before christmas, 1955, paddy's gone fishing on a boat in a lake; the same lake where he used to fish and talk to eoin's ghost when the screams and the shouts get too loud and he needs to run away.

eoin's here, saying: this is the last time we'll meet like this.

paddy's fallen silent. 'is it time?'

'it's about time,' eoin nods.

'when?'

'i can't tell you exactly when,' eoin says, 'but soon.'

'will we meet again, d'you think?' paddy asks. he doesn't look at eoin, when he says this. he stares at the far, far horizon. far into the future. a future he doesn't understand.

'one day,' eoin says. 'we will meet again. i won't be me and you won't be you, but we will meet again. it will hurt. it will feel lonely. we won't remember each other, but we will find a way.'

it's probably for the best, paddy thinks. he doesn't want to live in a world where there's war in his own backyard and he's going to be helpless about it. with his aching, creaking body and his drunk, demented mind. he's no longer the paddy mayne of ten years ago. this thought sits with him for a moment, before he looks to his right.

and eoin's gone.

let the young 'uns build their own world, he thinks.

that same world to which he will return.

and he will find eoin.

paddy returns to his fishing.

then he'll drive to bangor.

and then he'll drive back to newtownards.

then, who knows?

killian's been wondering about eric since the trip to battersea, since the day they picked up withers from the compound.

he's had his suspicions since the poems that blair has been sending via his dms. the things he's saying. he could hear it in eric's speaking voice. he's not an eejit. he's not blind.

but they're both cowards. this, killian will admit.

if eric is blair, how long has he known?

killian's sent that last poem to blair, because it's what he feels about eric. no holds barred. then eric's gone and said something about falling for him and then trying to pretend that he hasn't said it and it is really, truly, doing killian's head in.

he knows that blair will watch that last video. it was meant to be 'challenge' for cu chulainn, to record a video somewhere new and different, but it's killian who is throwing the gauntlet to blair.

to eric.

the ball's in eric's court now.

if they are the same person.

eric unsubscribes to cu chulainn straight away. deletes his internet history. wipes it clean. he's still in the middle of doing this, when killian (who else???) comes knocking at his door, with withers on a leash, asking if he wants to come dog-walking.

it's in the middle of the night, and it's freezing as hell. but withers needs to poop, killian says, batting his eyelash at eric. he could do with a walk.

eric fully understands killian-speak, now. what he means is: we need to talk.

away from here.

away from where we'd fucked like animals in wild abandon. find somewhere neutral.

eric looks back at the laptop on his table. killian could see the way eric's gaze shift from killian to the laptop, and eric notices how killian's clenching his jaw. killian rarely clenches his jaw, or looks even mildly pissed off. there is an irritability there that eric's never seen before. it's like a ticking time-bomb. it's obvious.

it's obvious that killian knows.

and eric's tired of running away. of hiding.

underneath his skin, paddy is laughing his arse off, the cheeky bugger.'

and then, a voice in his head, saying: 'you've got this, boyo.'

down the streets of tooting broadway, in the middle of january, killian asks: 'how long have you known?'

'since we started speaking to each other. even before we became -- friends,' eric chokes. 'are you angry at me?'

'no. i'm just-- why didn't you say anything?'

'what was i meant to say? hi, i'm blair and i've been wanking over your videos?' eric asks, voice rising to a fever pitch. 'your videos were fab, by the way.'

killian rolls his eyes. gives eric a side-eye and nudges their knees together. eric's gaze falls on their hands, cold, in the bleak midwinter. he reaches over and takes killian's hand, the one not holding withers' leash, and holds it in his. firm.

it's the first time he's ever done this in public.

there's a first for everything.

'when did you know i was blair?' eric asks.

killian takes a deep breath. 'i've suspected for a while, but getting withers was a dead giveaway. between that and the fucking poems, brother, you're not exactly subtle,' he winks.

eric shakes his head, thinking, yeah. he's never been subtle. 'vivid girl from the mountains,' he thinks. it's him. killian's been talking about him, all this while, he realizes. the feeling is odd but not wholly unwelcome. he's still unsure, but the only certainty he has is that killian's here and he's holding his hand. the only way he knows this is real is when he moves his hand, so that he could interlink their fingers together. and killian lets him. killian grips their hands tighter, two hands, joined up in a fist. shaped like a heart.

he's surprised at how easy it is for them to talk like this. he's expected it to be harder, to be more confrontational. after all the stop-starts. but then, he thinks, without those stop-starts, they wouldn't be here right now, walking around tooting with a wee dog, without the need to bite each other's heads off.

he's surprised that he's not angry. he's surprised that he hasn't felt the urge to thump someone.

killian's wearing a beanie that hides his curls, to keep his ears warm. eric's got his parka hood up. eric thinks, i want to be the one to pull that beanie off when you get home and fluff up your hair again, when your curls get flattened.

'did you mean what you've said?' eric asks. his voice tiny, shrill, like a scared little boy.

'i've said many things, eric. what did i say?'

'about -- being in love -- with me.'

killian pauses in his steps, then looks at eric. really, really looks at him. 'well. first of all. did you mean what you've said? about falling for me?'

eric blushes. he hates this feeling of being seen and being known, gaze lowered to the ground. 'hey, eric. look at me,' killian says. 'i've been where you were. i was scared too. i've never fallen in love, but i know how it feels to want something you think you could never have. because it's been drilled into you that it's wrong. but then i met you, and for the first time i got really, really scared. because this is different. this is not just a want or a need, or an urge,' he says, and eric thinks he could see tears in killian's eyes. 'this is real. you're my friend. i enjoy being around you. fucking and kissing and everything else besides. i don't want to ruin it. but i don't want to keep going on in circles.'

'how could someone like you want to spend time with someone like me? i've got nothing apart from a long list of charges and a prison record.'

'you keep selling yourself short, eric. i don't fucking care about your charges or you being in prison. and for fuck's sake if you bring up paddy or eoin i will thump you first myself.'

eric laughs.

then, killian says:

'i love you, eric love. there. i've said it. i love you.'

eric remembers the conversation he's had with ashley, a few weeks ago:

'there ain't no such thing as a soulmate. there's no one who will give you everything. it won't fucking happen,' ashley had said. 'so you get anything you can get. a fuck here, and there. and if you're lucky, you find someone who can give you a fuck and be a good friend. but if you're really lucky, you get someone who can give you more than just a good fuck or being just a good friend. those things don't come by easy. so take the chance when you can get them. or you'll just end up like me. or neville. alone. lonely.'

is this why eric's always been alone and lonely, then?

but eric's always liked being alone – to have his own space, his own privacy. before he met killian, he's unfussed with the idea of coming back to the flat with the empty fridge and the plastic chairs and the pot noodles leftovers from yesterday. even if it also serves as a reminder of his own loneliness.

but since killian, even the lumpy sofa is cosy, even the hard mattress that's unslept in feels comfortable. even the neighbour’s car alarm wailing from three streets away that stops him from staying asleep won't want to make him kick the wall and hurl something out of the window. even the pigeons disturbing his laundry hanging out to dry on the balcony seem...cute.

everything feels bearable.

everything feels easier.

'i love you, killian.'

years later --

the world will probably end soon, but killian and eric will stay together for as long as they can.

they make plans to go to belfast, to dublin. revisit the ghosts of their past. they'll go to galashiels and arran, on the train, hours and hours of just looking out the window and having good craic.

killian's studying to be a mental health nurse. eric's become an experienced youth worker and he gets something out of his job. the bbc interviewed him one time about the rise of knife crimes. oliver facetimes him from canada after watching it and said 'i can't believe this was the same man who had the prison officers balls in his mouth ten years ago.' eric cackles, and from behind he could also hear killian wheezing with laughter in the background. 'yeh I've got someone else's balls in my mouth now don't I?' eric says to oliver, winking suggestively.

killian throws a piece of crumpled paper at eric's head then. 'hello killian!' oliver says, through the screen. killian waves at oliver. 'hiya!' he says, beaming. flour on his cheeks and hair and nose. eric tells oliver, 'kill's making sausage rolls. it's better than greggs.'

it's the truth.

they can't go to egypt for various reasons; the first being financial and the second being eric having problems getting a visa because of his criminal past. which is all fine, really.

which is how they find themselves on a boat, in a lake, fishing. like paddy and eoin used to do.

paddy and eoin are still there, sometimes, but they don't do anything apart from enjoying the ride. this is killian and eric's story. not theirs.

some nights he lets him explore his body, tracing every outline, every ridge and curve, with his fingers, with his lips, with his tongue. some nights he lets him do the same to himself – and some nights, they do it to each other. there has never been a rule about who should be in control, although most nights it is him who surrenders everything, when he's so tired of being in control all the time, and he needs to let go, and he needs him to take the reins. there has never been a rule about how often they should fuck, or make love, or make out – but they have always been comfortable even without that kind of intimacy, because they've understood from day one that their relationship means more than that.

cu chulainn makes a final video to say that he's with someone, for real, now. it's been a trip, he says to his subscribers. eric's joined too, but only in the background. a speaking voice. tangible evidence that cu chulainn is indeed, with someone.

user @/la_reine_d_algerie types, 'i'm so pleased for the both of you. i'm glad you found yourselves. i hope you stay together, for the rest of your lives.'

eric who has never been in one of these videos before, says, 'that is the intention.' he pauses, then adds, 'and after that, who knows?'

and after that, who knows?

maybe one of them will die before the other. maybe they will live for another five, ten, fifty years.

maybe there will be another war in their lifetimes.

but for now, they are here. in this moment. together. no longer hiding. no longer afraid.

paddy and eoin still linger, paddy and eoin still live on --

but it's eric and killian who will write their own histories.

no longer haunted by the ghosts of their pasts.

hold hard then, heart. this way at least you live.

.end

#maybe i'll write another coda to this. who knows?????#paddy x eoin #paddy mayne #eoin mcgonigal #sas rogue heroes

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