#but sleep takes effort and i cant be assed

[toastsnaffler]

argh..

[goldustwomun]

bags (s.h.)

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

summary: you'd loved steve since you were fifteen, followed him wherever he went. so when you were finally over him, stumbling home with another man clinging to your side, why was he waiting by your doorstep?

warnings: (unedited) angst angst angst, best friend robin and nancy but also lovers <3 robin and nancy <3, swearing, drinking, clubbing/partying, self-deprecating thoughts and a stubborn reader, steve is kind of an asshole despair and dread lol, this went a route i hadn't expected but i'm feeling achey and sad tonight so :) enjoy :) and don't hate me!

wc: 2.2k+

note: i hope this isn't entirely ass lol i just want steve harrington to break my heart but like i cant put my ideas into words and its SO FRUSTRATING but whatever :’)

Can you see me? I'm waiting for the right time I can't read you, but if you want, the pleasure's all mine Can you see me using everything to hold back? I guess this could be worse Walkin' out the door with your bags

You should’ve known it’d end up this way. His back, coloured shades of blue and purple as dusk kissed at his skin, retreating into the distance and down the very road you’d just stumbled up only moments earlier. Maybe if you had listened a little closer, noticed a little more, the way he grabbed at your waist, squeezed your palms, held you close, you could’ve avoided it all. The shock and heartbreak and unbearable yearning only to turn up empty and desolate all over again.

Because you loved Steve Harrington, in more ways than he would ever know, but it had taken days, months, years, even, to get over that initial infatuation and belly flutter you’d been plagued with as teenagers. He was King Steve and you but a peasant, a shadow, one of many, that flocked to his side when he waved or smiled or tripped you up.

You loved Steve Harrington, but you hated him for waiting so long to work up the courage to just say it. I love you; I’ve always loved you, you wanted to say, but the words refused to pass the seal of your lips and instead you were left gaping at an empty spot on the ground, a Steve-shaped hole in your heart.

It’d been days since you’d seen him last, mourning his absence but refusing to sit around like you might’ve done if you were still seventeen. But no, you weren’t seventeen, you were a twenty-something independent that went out and did things and met people and kissed them if you wanted, maybe even take them home to your one-bedroom that would be otherwise empty without Steve plastered to your sofa, a hand stuffed into the popcorn you kept around because he once said he didn’t entirely hate it.

And that’s what you had done, convinced Nancy and Robin to leave the haze of their never-ending honeymoon phase to take you dancing. The drinks hadn’t stopped coming. Every time you gulped down a shot, another would be shoved into your hand before you’d had time to comprehend the reality of what you were going to do. To sleep with a stranger in the same space you’d watched Rocky with Steve only days earlier. You’d called and asked and begged him to come over, to join you, Nancy and Robin, but he’d bit at you in that way he sometimes did. The harsh edges of his teenage-self making itself known in ways you’d have liked to forget.

“Stop it, babes. I know what you’re doing,” Robin scolded, frowning at the dip between your brows and the lost look in your eyes. You forced a smile then, and she scoffed at the minimal effort you put into hiding your feelings, always having excelled at letting them take over your features even when you didn’t mean them to. Of course, every knew, everyone could see it in the way you trailed after him, like a lost puppy begging for an ounce of attention. Steve was cruel with the crumbs he handed you, but he didn’t know any better.

Everyone knew and everyone could see but Steve had always stood out, the most handsome, the most fit, the most clueless. And maybe that’s why you were perfect for each other because you hadn’t known either, had you.

“Come on, up you get!” Robin urged, pulling you from your chair with Nancy already clinging to her side, shuffling the three of you with what little sobriety she had left in her to the dance floor, pulsing lights and thrumming bodies none-the-wiser to the way you heart was cracking open.

So, you jumped and danced and bounced to the beat in ways you didn’t know you were capable of. Free and without regret and it wasn’t until someone was staring at you from across the room, watching your every moment with a fascination you’d never been subject to, that you stopped, pressing past Nancy and Robin with a tip of your head that assured them you’d be back.

He, whoever he was, surged into action, coming behind you at the bar where you were busy asking for a glass of water. You turned and smiled, stomach dipping, because he was attractive and strong, and he had these kind eyes and soft lips that looked like they’d be otherworldly against your skin. He introduced himself but the music obscured his words, so you nodded and pretended and wondered why you were dreading this conversation when it had only just begun.

He pulled you into a somewhat quieter corner after you’d gestured it was alright, and really, he seemed as surprised as you were when you all but pounced, mouth meeting his, open and desperate. He hadn’t complained, had probably seen it coming in the quiet desperation of your eyes. Of course, he didn’t know it was because of the way you wished it was someone else kissing you into the wall and not some all-consuming lust you were fueled by.

The next thing you knew you were huddled into the backseat of a cab, then stumbling across the gravel to your front door.

And that’s when you saw him. Sat on the bottom step of your apartment’s front door, gaze focused on the way whatever-his-name-was smirked into your neck, having probably thought you had stopped for a smooch and not because the man you had loved, unrequited, for close to a decade was staring at you like you’d stabbed him right in the chest, and twisted.

“Steve?” you whispered, loud enough to prompt Harrington off the step and marching across the short distance to you. “What are you—” but you never had a chance to ask him before he was swinging a left hook right into the guy’s jaw.

“Steve!” and you were shouting now, pushed to side as the stranger retaliated out of instinct, socking him in the nose. Steve looked like he was grinning, blood dripping into his mouth, like he was enjoying the feel of getting the shit beat out of him. “Stop it! Steve! I said—” you yanked him back, shoving him behind you as you rushed forward to-- fuck. You still don’t know his name.

“I’m sorry— Jesus Christ—” you swore when you noticed how his eye was already bruising as he shook you off. “I don’t know why he did that. I—I’m—"

His words were bitter when he responded, shooting daggers at the looming figure you were keenly aware was still behind you before meeting your pleading eyes. “It’s fine. It’s fine,” he assured you, squeezing your hip as he moved past you to leave. “You should talk to your boyfriend, you know, before you bring anyone else over.”

“I’m not—He’s not—” but he was gone, and you were still reeling from what had just happened, what Steve had just done. You turned, anger coursing through you so violently your hands were shaking. “Fucking hell—Steve! What the fuck are you doing here? And what the fuck was that?!”

“Were you going to fuck him?” he asked plainly, bluntly, shirt pulled to his face as he tried to stop the bleeding. There was still that wild look in his eyes, a flush to his skin, like he too was dazed and confused.

“What—I--- how is that any of your fucking business?” you answered back, shoving a finger against his chest. He was immovable though, only grabbed at your hand and held it until your palm was flat against the front of him. You could feel, now, the reckless thrum of his heartbeat, and you asked yourself how you’d gotten here in the first place, pushed up against a bloodied and bruised Steve Harrington.

“Just tell me. If I hadn’t been sat here, would you have fucked him?”

And you didn’t completely understand it, didn’t know what answer he was looking for—the one that was acquiesce him enough to explain himself or at the very least go inside and forget about all this ever happening—so instead you answered honestly. “Yes,” but your voice cracked at the end, so you snatched your hand back, cradling it to yourself like an injured bird you hoped to keep cocooned in your warm. You cleared your throat and tried again. “Yeah, I would have slept with him. And if it hadn’t been him, I would have found someone else.”

He nodded, looking as if he were pained but you were certain, now, it wasn’t because of the punch he’d taken to the face. “And if I had answered your call, met you there, got drunk and kissed you, would you have fucked me, too?”

You reeled at his words, feeling entirely as though you were the one in the midst of a fight. “Where is this coming from, Steve? Why are you saying these things to me?” you begged, pleaded, tired of whatever back-and-forth the two of you had gotten into the habit of.

“Look—” and he was determined now, steely gaze pinning you to the ground. His bruised knuckles brushed through his hair, scattering the strands across his forehead so that your fingers tingled with the urge to brush them out of his eyes like you’d always done. “—I should’ve said this ages ago. I just—I never could because it was never the right time, and I didn’t really see you in that way, not when I knew you did—” and really you wanted to stop him there, let the Earth swallow you whole and spit your bones out to be buried far from here. “I knew you had this—this thing for me but I ignored it but then we became friends and we—I mean, we watch movies, and we cuddle on the couch and sometimes I think I’d like to do that with you all the time and—

“Steve, please,” you whispered through the tears flooding past your irises, looking anywhere but at him, cheeks flushed with humiliation. He’d always had this tight grip around your heart and maybe he didn’t know that with every word he spoke that grip tightened, and tightened, and you were sure your heart was going to burst if he didn’t shut up right then.

“Just listen—I want to do those things with you always, sweetheart, I really do. I could’ve—I mean, I should’ve communicated my feelings earlier, I know I should have, but I didn’t want to lie to you. Not when you mean so much to me and I couldn’t give you what you wanted.” He looked at you then, expectantly, reaching forward to pull you into his embrace but you stumbled back, wanting out of the hold he had on you in more ways than one.

“Am I meant to thank you for looking at me differently now?” you bit out, exhaustion coating your syllables like rust on a nail.

His face fell as he stuttered over his own words. “I mean—no, sweetheart, no, of course not, I just thought—”

“You thought because I’m pathetic—because I’ve always been fucking pathetic to you—stumbling after you since high school that I’d just be, what, waiting for you? That I’d welcome your change of heart with open arms and gratitude?” you scoffed, gaze narrowed as you watched that wall of his build itself back up. Your ego was bruised and you were too stubborn to admit it, because you thought he had been clueless, and that thought had kept you safe all these years as you curled into his side every weekend.

“I don’t think that. I’ve never thought that” he cautioned, temper rising. If Steve Harrington was anything it was beautiful, and if he wasn’t beautiful, he was angry, stubborn, a pot ready to boil over.  

“Come on, Steve. You said it yourself: I’ve had a thing for you since freshmen year. I followed you after we graduated, and I’ve followed you again, here, now. It took me years—fucking years—to get over it, to accept that I’d never be more than a friend, if that, and now, after you’ve been dodging me for days, you turn around and confess some sort of miracle feelings for me?” You were panting, out of breath from the way the words spilled out of you, thoughts you shouldn’t have kept to yourself all this time.

“Well what should I have done!” he roared, and a few curious lights blinked on from the building behind him. “Should I have not befriended you when you turned up to the same college? Should I have, instead, fucked you ten years ago when it would have meant nothing to me?” And you flinched at his words.

“You should have let me be, Steve,” you sighed, defeated. Because he was right, but you hated him for prodding at wounds you were still trying to heal.  “You should have kept it to yourself and let me be.” But really what you wanted to say was you’ve been lying to Robin and Nancy because you weren’t over him. You loved him; you’d always love him, but you were afraid, if you told him the truth, that he’d slowly fade from your life until he wasn’t a part of it anymore.

He nodded, face slipping into that mask of his you’d dreaded seeing. “Right. Got it.”

He pushed past you, and you wanted to thank him for the slight brush of his skin against yours, but you kept quiet, like you always had.

as always, please comment and reblog if you enjoyed <3

[wooziorgans]

Here again bc i cant sleep! So some jihoon rage!

Definitely the type to get needy when you're asleep, so he peppers you with little kisses on your cheeks, forhead, nose.. with no aim of waking you up just waiting for you to react only to whisper in your ear i miss you and then cuddles to sleep...

Back hugs back, hugs back, hugs ... he kisses your palm every single time you cup his face...

I've been thinking about angst woozi, and why does he look like he apologises first!? He 2000% whispers "Baby, im sorry." Then he reasons out with you...

Also, why do i feel part of his ego screams exhibitionist

So much to unpack about that beautiful talented man

-🎀

food for thought (2)

oh my god hi ily these r scratching my brain so hard rn.

needy jihoon

ugh he just misses you so bad when the days get long for him. so most of the time you’re asleep when he gets home, but it’s never a super deep sleep because you always try to wait up for him.

but the thing about you and jihoon is that you’re both naturally very sleepy, so you fall asleep in the comfort of your bed because it’s just so warm and soft and it smells like jihoon. and you miss him too, even when you text him throughout the day to make sure he’s taking breaks and eating when he can.

so when he comes home and finds you asleep with the lamp still on and your face pushed into his pillow with your headphones on, with the video you were watching on autoplay, he can’t help but feel bad about making you wait up for him. still, he finds you so cute. your lips are puffed out in a pout and you look so calm.

jihoon carefully closes your laptop, unplugging the headphones from it and setting it on the bedside table. he carefully holds your head to get it off the pillow in order to remove your headphones. you grumble softly in your sleep at the slight movement, jihoons scent not as strong anymore.

he can’t really fight the urge to kiss you, even as you sleep. so he presses a soft kiss to your forehead, slipping the headphones off your ears and setting them down on top of your laptop.

he’s already ready for bed, clothes thrown off as soon as he got into the house and a quick stop in the bathroom to wash up. but you? you’re in sweatpants and a hoodie. too many layers and jihoon knows if you keep sleeping like this, especially beside him, you’ll overheat. so he kisses your cheek softly, one over your nose, a few over each eye, your chin, your jaw; wherever he can reach.

you stir softly, whining and curling into yourself as you slowly wake up. jihoon placed another kiss to your cheek as you slowly open your eyes. “ji, you’re home.” you almost whisper, voice tired and ridden with sleep.

“hi my love. i missed you.” his hand carefully brushes the side of your face as he finally lets himself kiss you on the lips. you return it as best you can.

“missed you too, pretty. did you eat?” jihoon can’t help but smile at the way you still care to check on him, even after you’ve just woken up.

“i did. c’mon, let’s get you out of this so we can sleep.” jihoon’s hands slide to the hem of your sweater. you make very little effort to help him out, and so he pulls you up to his chest to help you slip it over your head.

the sweats are easier to remove. he pulls them over your ass and lays you back down before throwing the covers over himself. you curl into his side, pressing a soft kiss to his jaw.

he reaches over, grabbing the remote to turn on something for background noise for the two of you to fall asleep to. he turns the lamp off, rolling over slightly to hold you. you kiss him softly, and then give him a few more kisses, and both of you kiss slowly until they dissolve into nothing as the two of you start to fall asleep.

back hugs and palm kisses

jihoon normally finds you in the kitchen making breakfast when he wakes up. still half asleep, he wraps his arms around your waist, pressing his chest into your back. he kisses your neck softly, pressing his face into your skin. “g’morning love.” he murmurs against your neck.

you smile softly, placing the spatula down on the holder on the stove. you step back from the stove, his feet following your movements. you turn around in his hold and he protests slightly, perfectly content with the position he was holding you in.

your hand slides up to his cheek, thumb resting over the bone and edge of your palm against his lips. he puckers them softly, placing a soft kiss to your palm. the action makes you flush softly, so he does it again and you brush your thumb against his cheek. “morning.” jihoon removes one of his hands from your waist to place it over your hand on his face.

he grabs it, removing it from his face and kissing your palm and then your knuckles, eyes locked onto yours. you stay like that for a while, him kissing your hand, and then finally your lips.

the pan crackles on the stove. “oh, shit. the eggs!” both of you laugh as you quickly turn to your attention to the stove.

making up

“so. you’re on a break now.” your hands massage jihoon’s shoulders as you lean over him in his desk chair. “why don’t we take a little vacation? get away for a few days, hm?” jihoon doesn’t even look up from his home computer.

“i have work to do, y/n.” you press your thumb down into his neck.

“i just thought that… y’know, you’ve been so busy, it would be nice to take some time away from everything.” you sigh. this makes him turn around in his chair. his eyebrows are furrowed.

“jesus christ, i have so much work to do right now, i can’t afford to take a break.” he snaps. this makes you flinch back, away from him. you raise your hands in surrender.

“if you didn’t want to go, you could’ve just said so.” you shift uncomfortably on your feet. “come to bed when you’re finished, i’m going to sleep.” without another word, you leave his home office, and head to your shared bedroom.

getting into bed, you sigh, feeling uneasy about how on edge your boyfriend’s been lately. he needs this break, but he’s not able to properly recognize when he needs one himself. he complies with you on the breaks, but this time he didn’t.

half an hour later, jihoon walks into the bedroom with slumped shoulders. your back is away from the door, the lamp still on which means you’re still awake.

jihoon sits on the bed beside you. his hands itch to reach out and rub your back to comfort you in the same way he always does when you’re upset. the only difference now is that you’re upset at him, which means he doesn’t know if you’d push him away. “baby, i’m so sorry.” his voice is quiet. “i’m sorry for snapping at you like that. i didn’t mean to, i’ve just been so tired and stressed… and you’re right. i need to take a break.” once he stops talking briefly, you roll over to face him.

“i wish you would’ve just told me if you didn’t want to go somewhere with me instead of reacting like that.” you sigh, and jihoon sees the dried tear tracks on your face and it makes him feel worse.

“i know, baby, i know. i’m so sorry. i do want to go somewhere with you, though. i’ve just been so in my head about this song that it’s… i really need a break.” he sighs, fingers twitching to reach out and touch you. you notice and take his hand. “lets go camping, hm? no internet, no distractions, no work; just us.” his thumb strokes the back of your hand. you smile softly at him.

“okay,” is all you offer.

“lets call it a night, okay? i’ll figure out details in the morning.” he places a kiss to the back of your hand, sliding down the bed to lay down beside you.

“okay. i love you.” you whisper, and jihoon feels like a massive weight has been lifted off his chest.

“i love you too. i’m so sorry if i made you feel like i didn’t, or if i made you feel like i don’t want to spend time with you. i do, but you know how i get sometimes and i’m sorry for taking it out on you.” you peck his lips softly.

“i know, love. stop apologizing please and come here.” you pull him close to you and give him another kiss. all is forgiven, and that’s all jihoon needs to know. he still feels bad though, and he spends the entire camping trip making it up to you. in many ways.

exhibitionism

“fuck, stop doing that.” jihoon hisses, hands tightening against your hips. you raise an eyebrow at him innocently.

“what do you mean, hoonie?” the water of the pool splashes around you. everyone else is significantly more drunk than you two are. you wiggle your hips again, and he pushes his fingers into your hip bone in a warning.

“you’re making me hard.” is all he offers, lips brushing against your ear. you know your boyfriend, and if it was actually a problem, he’d push you off of him. but with the state of everyone else, no one has noticed a thing. everyone has left you two in your own world in the pool as they all decided to relax in the hot tub. soonyoung and seokmin are busy entertaining everyone by singing love songs, with the microphones dangerously close to the hot water.

“maybe that’s the goal.” jihoon turns and pushes your back against the edge of the pool. his fingers slip under the band of your bottoms.

“in front of everyone? fuck, you’re lucky they’re drunk. gonna take you in this fucking pool.” you suspected your boyfriend might have been a bit of an exhibitionist, and this little trip with the rest of seventeen and their respective partners was only confirming it.

jihoon slides his hand down your skin, index finger pressing into your clit. you bite your lip to silence a moan. “you always brag about how you can be quiet if you need to be. why don’t we test that out?” he lifts you up slightly, before pushing his fingers into you. you bite back the low moan you nearly let out successfully, and palm him through his trunks.

“just fuck me, please. it’s been torture not being able to have you because we’re sharing a room with soonyoung and his partner.” you wrap your legs around his waist. jihoon removes his fingers from inside you. he pushes your bottoms to the side, sliding his shorts down to free his cock. with his hands on your hips, he guides you down onto his cock.

true to your word, you stay quiet, but jihoon can see how much you’re struggling. “fuck, so fucking tight.” he’s never this vocal. something about potentially getting caught must be doing something to him.

“you like this? god, na pd was right. you are an exhibitionist.” you laugh softly, the sound getting cut off when he pulls you down onto his cock.

“it took you this long to figure out? i fuck you in my studio enough. you know how people can see into my studio from the big ass windows.” he kisses your neck softly. “what can i say? i like the thrill.” you clench around him, and he moans softly.

mingyu calls over to the two of you. “you guys doing okay? you should come join us in the hot tub.” jihoon bites his lip as you keep clenching.

“yeah, just give us a minute. y/n wants to swim for a bit longer.” a chorus of boos echoed from the hot tub, before everyone is back to ignoring you. “fuck, you’re gonna kill me, gonna get us caught.” jihoon whispers, kissing you softly.

ugh i hope i did these justice. theyr all so good HELP. also new dividers, i hope they look okay. i love u pink ribbon anon gmammgmak these r gonna kill me if i think abt them for too long.

[tootiecakes234]

Katsuki taking care of sick Y/N:

“Kkkaaaaaaaaattttttt…… katsukiiiiii…” you called out from your burrito roll in the bed.

“What?” He shouted from the living area.

You didn’t answer but peaked your head out to look at the door for his inevitable arrival.

This is your 3rd or 4th time calling him today and you knew he was starting to get annoyed with you but you couldn’t give a rats ass.

You were stuck in this room, on your death bed because that asshole refused to let you be more than 5 inches away from him while he was sick.

You knew it would turn out this was and now he was back to 100% but you were running fevers and hacking up lungs.

He barged into the room with an exasperated look on his face.

“What do you want now? And so help me god if you ask me to hand you the remote one more time I’m gonna blow the whole damn tv off the wall.”

He was currently wearing sweats, no shirt, and the apron you bought him for Christmas that said “ No idiots in my kitchen”. He loved that damn apron.

“What are you doing” you asked followed by a sniffle.

“I’m TRYING to make your soup because you haven’t eaten anything in 2 days. But you seem dead set on making sure I never get to finish making it.”

“But I’m lonely, and I’m not hungry. I want to you to come lay with me…. Hold me.” You say with a little pout forming on your lips.

“Y/N, you have to eat. Also I told your ass to finish that damn glass of water and it’s still half full. You’re never gonna feel better if you don’t do what I tell you.” He says in his stream voice.

“You’re not a doctor. I didn’t do all this when you were-“ then you choke and cough until little tears gather in the corners of your eyes.

“See look, you’re choking because your body knew you were about to spit out some bullshit. You didn’t do all this because I was cooperative.” He says as he sits on the edge of the bed rubbing his hands over your cheeks. “You’re being stubborn and trying to get under my skin by calling me every 5 seconds.”

“Well I wouldn’t be sick if you weren’t such a baby. I told you this would happen and look. Now I’m dying…. Did you do it on purpose? Are you trying to get rid of me??”

“Babe, I don’t have to put in this much effort to get rid of you. If I don’t watch after you, you’ll end up offing yourself before long.” And he chuckled.

“My pain is funny!?!?” You exclaimed.

He chuckles more, “kind of.”

“This! This is what I meant by shitty bedside manner. You’re so mean to me.”

He leans down and presses a kiss to your forehead and pulls back with a soft smile on his lips.

“Ok, ok, ‘m sorry. Just let me go finish making the soup and then I’ll come back in here and rock your whining ass to sleep. Do you want me to lay you on the couch while I finish?” He asks.

You nod your head yes and then he stands and sweeps you up quickly into his arms.

When you get to the living room he sets you down gently on the couch.

“Now you can see me slaving away for you in the kitchen. Are you satisfied?”

And you nod again.

He straightens up and starts heading back to the kitchen.

“Wait Kat” he turns back around to face you. “Before you leave…. Can you hand me the remote?” You ask and try to keep the laugh in that’s threatening to escape at the glare directed at you.

If looks could kill, you’d be a goner😭

Katsuki Masterlist

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[teddybeartoji]

mickey i fear youre the only one who can match my freak .. OLEASE FUCKKKKK CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT TOJI N SOMNO FUCKMEEE

FUCJCKKC I NEED HIM SO BAD . toji using u in ur sleep but accidentally waking u up in the process of him sliding his thick cock into you , but he doesn't care , rlly he prefers u when ur all dazed and sleepy like this . he shushes you when you whine at the stretch and just tells you "go back t'sleep, doll." he has to hold himself back from cumming so quick when you clench around him tight when u finally realize whats happening FYCICKKKK

anyway hai mickey boo how are u on this wonderful day :3

SOMNO MENTIONN LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i genuinely think that you would always wake up bc he's just so big yk...... he peels off your pants and then just kneads your ass a little while palming himself over his own pjs aaaaand then he's parting your cheeks so he can get a good look at your holes and oooh my god it takes him so much effort to not let out the loudest groan ever..... and then he leans forward to press a kiss to your cunt . the first one is always a proper kiss. aaand then he's placing another and another and another, coating you with his saliva to get you nice and ready for him. plays with your folds and rubs your clit with his eyes all heavy and low fuck you look so so so pretty like this... and thaaat's when he finally pulls his own pants down too, spitting down onto his cock and giving himself a couple of firm pumps before lining up his leaky tip with your tight little hole mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

he always likes to get all close to you too like he never stays upright while fucking you while you sleep bc for one. he doesn't want you get too scared yk he wants you to feel good too and two. he just loves being close to you. that's it. he presses himself against you as he grinds his hips into yours at a deliciously slow pace, occasionally biting your shoulder and the crook of your neck to stifle his own moans.. he always ends up cumming so fast too bc you're just so fucking cute like this, all pouty with your eyebrows scrunched together, your hands pawing at his chest like a little kitten as he fills you up with his cum mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[miruac]

dating kozume kenma headcanons - part 2

masterlist

navigation

warnings: not proofread, movie and timeskip spoilers, very self indulgent

a/n: EHEHEHEHEH I LOVE MY INTROVERTED GAMER BABY | word vomit. this is just pure word vomit.

during nationals when they were away, kenma always texted you before and after a game(kinda shocking since he's dry asl)

he would be a little clingy, especially when he was sleepy since he had no filter then

but he literally like slept so late there...(THAT ONE SCENE OF HIM WAKING UP WITH BEDHEAD <3)

before their match with karasuno, he sent you a gif of a happy dancing cat(it was him trying to convey emotion)

after the match, he sent you a text that read 'i guess i'm coming home'

which made you happy he was coming back, but also sad that they lost

right when they got back home, you went over to his house to give him some congratulatory apple pie and cuddles

obviously he got a fever and was literally bedridden for a couple of days, so you had to wait a little while before seeing the poor boy

but when you did, he was still a little sick so he just clung onto you(

when he's sleepy, i headcanon he likes his hair to be played with and when you do it he just falls asleep

timeskip to the future, and its been like what, 7 years? you've moved in with him into his house, and it's pretty casual at this point

he always comes to bed late since he stays up on stream, and he ends up waking up so late

but before you go to bed, he's almost always taking a break from his stream to kiss you goodnight

sometimes if you're feeling clingy AND sleepy, he'll let you sit on his lap and sleep there while he's on stream

guys everyone writes kenma as if he's someone who's lazy as hell, and cant cook

BUT NOT ME!!! i know kenma can cook because he isn't that self-negligent, like if he moved out by himself then surely he knows how to somewhat provide for himself

he doesn't cook much because he doesn't like how much effort it takes, but when he cooks its kinda fire

you guys alternate, but its usually you cooking

i know he doesn't eat much canonly but loves seeing you in the kitchen its so domestic

when you catch him staring his lil bitch ass smirks at you and is like 'you look good in my kitchen.'

EPHASIS ON "MY KITCHEN" LIKE AODJSAOLDJASJDL

guys stop he's so cute when hes posessive

SPEAKING OF POSESSIVENESS OMG

ok now kenma's posessiveness varies from day to day

if he sees another guy with you, he doesn't rage immediately but when he sees them holding you in a way how he does? that's when he slides between you guys and takes you back

but also sometimes when you're about to go out in revealing clothes, he gets all pouty and clingy

he doesn't let go of you and looks up you with such pleading eyes(im so weak. im so weak for him omg)

guys he ALWAYS goes to pick you up himself

most likely he's going to bed by the time youre done, he can spare a couple minutes getting you

and plus i know he may not act like it, but your safety is like one of his top priorities

especially since you're the partner of a famous streamer, he does his best to make you comfortable

whether that's having you sit out of frame when he's on stream, or keeping you hidden

the media's really mean, and he'd do anything to prevent you from seeing or witnessing something hurtful just because you're dating him

he takes all the necessary precautions he knows of, and always tries to keep your identity anonymous

but when you felt comfortable enough, you slowly started to creep into his streams

at first it would just be a hand popping into frame, to you literally napping on his lap while he streamed

he told his fans that he was taken before and they thought he was lying, but since they've seen you they're amazed that he actually pulled

overall, his audience loves you and they literally see how kenma lights up when he looks at you

like his eyes are so soft and glassy and hazed with love(im gonna cry. why isn't he real. please i want him so bad)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

2nd a/n: guys this is literally not proofread this is such shit work like im not even processing these thoughts in my brain IM LITERALLY JUST WORD VOMITTING RN ok im done thank you for listening to my ted talk GOODNIGHT

[puckpocketed]

So do you actually believe PLD is a good player or is that part of the bit?

The PLD Post

i spent a good 2 days giggling about this to friends. i cant tell if ur a curious caps fan, a person who knows me from my other teams, a disgruntled kings fan (i’ve mostly ruled this out because im pretty sure i know all of the active ones on here) or WHAT. but i’m laughing. the tone of this ask is hilarious and vaguely accusatory but i will take it in good faith and answer <3 tl;dr yes and no. he’s better than people think he is rn, but he’s likely never going to live up to the potential of his tools unless something . idk. recalibrates his entire being. who knows!

i was working on something longer and more complex but i thought about it for more than 5 seconds and i REFUSE to go hockey-bro mode and pull out the microstats and i don’t wanna make this into a full on PLD manifesto. so. caps girlies (gn) HERE are your adoption papers under the cut!

if you are looking at pierre luc dubois who is 6’4 + 220lb and thinking “Oh he’s a power forward” i have to inform you he is in fact THEEE smallest mouse to ever play hockey in the whole world and in all of history. he sips nectar out of a thimble and sleeps curled up in a match box and goes fishing in a boat made from nutshells and twigs . he’s big, but he sort of plays small.

this is not necessarily a bad thing — he relies on foot speed and skill over hitting.

he can throw hits but prefers to stick check. he leverages his big frame to guard the puck and to defend, and it makes him simultaneously VERY effective and very much what i like to call a Nexus Of Crime. he is either drawing ten thousand penalties because people have to do something to stop him from driving the net with speed OR he is taking ten thousand penalties because he gets eager in the corners.

PLUS he’s huge and refs do just assume he’s committing a crime when they can’t see what’s going on <3 hence, Nexus Of Crime! if there’s a penalty he’s probably involved LMAO

not a “dirty” player by any means. not physical unless he decides he wants to. and there is no violence inside of him unless he’s deeply horsebonded to his team <- IMPORTANT re; playoffs aspirations. you won’t see him put himself on the line simply for the love of the game, he HAS to be committed to the team.

to be committed to his team… i’m honestly not sure what that takes. i’d guess a combination of knowing his role on the ice and in the locker room (this was very unclear on lak) consistency of messaging from coaches (also seemed to be an issue on lak)

i know nothing about caps coaching or management or the team vibes but i’m sure you can fix him <3 i’m ready to fall in love and ride this team to the sunset

this failhorse will NOT shoot the puck and if he does it will be the saddest soggiest most pathetic shot you’ve ever seen. you will tear your hair out in chunks if you watch him expecting an elite goalscorer.

he’s a pass-first guy. likes to drop pass! likes to drive play from the middle but is also capable of getting pucks off the boards. he needs a finisher on his wing. i could pull up stats here, there are stats to be pulled up, but i know this in my HEART from watching dozens of kings games: he would have had 10-15 more points easily if he wasn’t stapled to the 3rd line and had better finishers. many times i watched him tee up a very good opportunity only for his guy to miss the net or fan or just get knocked off the puck

individually, he thrives in front of the net. his ass is fat and he’s about to use it to screen the goalie. hes good at catching loose pucks in the crease to send them home <3 see his performance at worlds. he scored basically all of his goals right up there!!

most media coverage/narratives will tell you his point production dropped off bc of effort (which is true) but even the MOST resentful kings watchers will say pld wasn’t given his best shot playing with inexperienced+fringe nhlers, being line shuffled the moment he got a bit comfortable, and also not getting ANY net front time on the lak pp. i factor this into all my judgements of his performance.

He’s def earned his diva rep LMAO!! this is personal opinion here but he seems like a sensitive and easily rattled little clam… like he will have a couple of bad shifts and if there’s nobody there to shake him out of it he’ll lose his grasp on the game and play like shit <3 a rolling joke on kingstwt was figuring out which PLD we were getting that game, and you could tell by his 5th if he was switched on or off!!

they hate him for this but EYE think this is nothing new for athletes and if he can consistently stay in the zone he’ll probably be pretty good. mental fortitude of a wet tissue my beloved….

moving onto the Vibes section!! he was always good humoured in media availability and didn’t shy away from scrums even when public opinion soured against him and critiques of both his hockey and his character had reached a fever pitch. i like this about him. he always gave authentic answers and tried his best to accomodate them, and never hid behind his captains.

he gets along quite well with teammates despite the narratives. no seriously!! some of the the kings had a hang out during off-season right before they went to worlds!! there’s bisexual lighting!!!!

there’s interviews from old jets teammates that are just like. “he used to turn up at my house with his dog and text IM HERE with no warning and that’s how we became friends” or “his obsession with euro soccer teams bewitched me”. he had control of the aux cord. he was a den mother and planned group gatherings. a genuine sweetheart to every teammate he’s ever had!!

I don’t think he’s some. idk. secret 100 point producing star 1C. but i truly believe with the right environment he’ll probably hit 60 points again.

thank you for your time if you made it this far and i hope to see you all in the trenches (caps lb) next season 👍

[chubbycelebs]

The Big Boys (part 3)

The dark room was filled with a sweet musky smell, the smell of sweat and food that clouded the room. The floor was scattered with food wrappers and empty containers, bottles of milkshakes, fizzy pop and beers. Clothes were thrown around all over the place, T-shirts and jeans, socks and stretched out underwear. The room was a complete state which reflected the boys inside the room. The large bed had a think cover over the top of it, which was tangled in the two boys that occupied it. The cover was barely big enough to cover the two large boys body, a few of their limbs poking out getting air. A thick hairy leg, a once muscly arm, one huge ass. One of the boys began to stir in their sleep, rolling over and sliding their legs out from under the cover. As he heaved him self out of the soft bed, a quick low toned fart squeezed out of his fat ass. The other boy didn’t even flinch still sleeping like a hog. The boy waddled over to the door of the bedroom and opened it.

The corridor light flooded the room as Zayn stepped out into the light. We huffed and groaned, still waking up, as he marched his way to the kitchen, his expanded naked body on full display. Once reaching the kitchen he was met with the sight of Liam, the fifth member of their group. He was sat in his underwear (still having some modesty compared to the other chunky boys) hunched over a bowl of cereal, slowly munching his way through it. He glanced up as the naked Zayn made a beeline for the fridge. “Fuck me Zayn, cover up next time. No one wants to see all that at this time Jesus” Liam says throwing up a hand to cover Zayns privates. Zayn didn’t respond just giving a slight grunt as he opened the fridge and pulled out some left over cake from the night before. About a third of the cake was left which he just plonked down on the table opposite to where Liam was sat. He pulled out a fork and started making his way through the last third of the cake. “Jesus what have you done to your self Zayn?” Liam asks unable to take his eyes away from the pig that was sat opposite him. Compared to the slim, toned, muscly Zayn he knew a few months ago this was a completely different person. Where his muscles once were, they were now filled with thick fat. His stomach had no definition, just a large slab of lard that jiggled when he breathed. His chest was thick and covered in hair. He was unrecognisable if it wasn’t for his face and tattoos.

“Just enjoying life Liam stop being so up your own arse” Zayn responds not taking the nonsense Liam was spewing.

“There’s enjoying life and then becoming a fucking butter ball mate come on.” Zayn just rolls his eyes and carries on shovelling mounds of cake into his mouth. “Let me take you to the gym or sommit please. Cant be living like this” Liam says in a ditch effort to sort his mate out.

“Fuck that. I like being fat and so does Niall. Not stepping food in a gym ever again” Zayn finally snaps back at Liam.

For once Liam is quiet and has nothing to say. He looks puzzled at Zayn now confused by what he just said. “What do you mean Niall likes it?” He finally gets out.

“Jesus Christ you that thick mate. We’ve been fucking for months and we both enjoy being fat so yeah. Sorry you can’t stand to look at such a prized hog.” Zayn starts to stand up and picks up what’s left of the cake he hadn’t quite finished. “I’m going back to bed now. Sorry for disturbing you with my fat.” Zayn slaps his gut and then walks out of the kitchen, cake in hand.

Liam watched with his mouth open as Zayns fat ass jiggled on his way out. He can’t believe the information he had just found out. Not only were Zayn and Niall fucking they were getting each other fatter?! They were willingly blowing them selves up into huge hogs?! Without even noticing the thought left a tent shape in his underwear and a quickened pulse. He knew he had to go tell Louis and Harry what he found out.

Without finishing his cereal he pushed him self back and quickly walked out of the kitchen. He made his way down the corridor and round to where Louis bedroom was. He quickly knocks on the door and doesn’t wait for a response and pushes the door open. “Louis you’ll never guess what I… OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY.”

As Liam opened the door he was met by the sight of a fattened Louis on all fours getting fucking hard and fast by a much larger Harry. Liam caught a glimpse of their soft glistening body’s and saw the amount of food that circled their bed. Harry and Louis quickly turned round to the door and instantly stopped fucking each other collapsing on the bed. Liam slammed the door shut and ran quickly to his bedroom.

He was pacing back and forth murmuring to him self. “I can’t believe it. They are all fat. And fucking each other. All of them! Fuck me what’s happened to them all? Oh god. Jesus fucking christ.”

After probably a few hours of pacing around his room, Liam finally decided his plan of action. He picks up his phone and sends a message into the boys group chat. “Can we all meet in the living room now please. I wanna talk to you all.”

All the boys respond and agree to meet in the living room.

When Liam arrives he is the only one fully clothed. The sight of seeing all the boys he once viewed as fit in shape lads was not the one he was met with now. He first saw Niall who was just sat naked on the sofa. He had blown up almost becoming unrecognisable with how much fat he had put on. He almost seemed smug of the fact that his belly was covering his dick. Next to him was Zayn who at least had the modesty to put some joggers on even if they were skin tight to this thickened thighs. He had a hand placed on Niall’s thigh that he was periodically squeezing. Next to Zayn was Louis who just like Niall had become almost unrecognisable with the amount of fat he had pilled onto his body. Everything sagged on him, his chest, his belly, even his arms and thighs seemed to. He was wearing a very tiny and very tight pair of briefs that left nothing up to the imagination. Then next to fat Louis was the fattened Harry. My god what had he done. Probably the hottest member before this had turned into one fat bastard Liam thought to him self as he took a seat opposite the boys. A round belly replaced his once flat abs. His love handles spilled over his jock strap which was also oozing fat from his ass and thighs. What had he become of him self?

Liam didn’t even know where to start with this. Seeing all the boys sat opposite him looking that that really just threw him through a loop.

“We can explain our selves” Harry finally mustered up to say.

“Oh please do Harry enlighten me” Liam said a little snappy.

Harry took a slight breath in and a glance at Louis who gave him a little smile of reassurance. “Well you see, me and Louis have been seeing each other for a few months now, probably six or so months and well erm… you remember that night we were saying that Louis had put on a few and so had Niall?” Harry paused but was met with no reaction by Liam. “Well” he continued “it kind of sparked something for me and for Louis and that we wanted to see what it would be like if we continued to fatten up. And I know this isn’t exactly normal but we are all very happy with how we are. We are happy with each other and happy having a bit extra layers on us. Really there is nothing to worry about.” Harry was looking at Liam who was trying not to make eye contact with any of the boys, or their bellies, or in Niall’s case his dick. A few of the other boys reiterated Harry’s final point of having nothing to worry about. There was an awkward pause waiting for a response from Liam.

“Why did no one tell me?” He says in a low voice not even looking at the boys now. They all looked around at each other. Louis was the first one to speak.

“Well you weren’t exactly the nicest when I started gaining weight. Even when I was gaining by accident every time you’d see me you’d call me “chubs” or poke my belly or ass” he said quite confidently but with a bit of compassion in his voice, trying not to sound too harsh or like he was telling him off.

“Yeah you were similar to me as well” Niall said “like when I came out of the shower and all you did was jiggle my belly calling me a lard arse” Niall couldn’t even keep a straight face as he said it. “Which isn’t wrong I am” this was met with a few laughs from the boys “but it came across as quite like diminishing you get me?” Liam gives a little nod in response.

“The idea was to always tell you Liam that we were seeing each other” Harry says “but we didn’t know how to say that we were getting with other and fattening each other up.” Harry also was slightly smiling now.

“Just thought you’d notice and just accept that is how it is now” Zayn says.

They all way now for Liam to say something.

“I don’t have an issue with you guys seeing each other or being erm… like into erm…”

“Becoming fat fucks?” Niall finishes off. A few bits giggle.

“No no well yeah but ya get me.” The boys nod smiling. “To be honest I think everything I said to you Niall and Louis it was sort of like my own insecurity maybe? Like I used to be a fat kid and I remember I enjoyed just eating what I wanted and not worrying about it but in secondary school like what people say to you fucking suck. I didn’t wanna be the fat kid of the school even though I enjoyed everything that came with it. I guess I was just pushing that onto you guys and I’m really sorry…” Liam trails off. The boys had never known that about Liam before. Louis gets to and puts an arm around Liam and slowly rubs it. Liam can feel the warm soft flesh pushed against his body.

“It’s fine Liam don’t worry. That’s horrible what you had to go through but you don’t have to worry around us. I mean look at us all” Louis gestures to the group. “We are all fat assess now! Don’t worry about it. Be who you wanna be here. We all still love you”

Around the group is nodding and a few agreeing yeses. Liam looks up with a grin on his face. “Thank you guys. Thank you so much.” All the boys get up and go into one big fat hug all squishing up against each others. “Can we order a maccies now?” Liam asks which is met with a very positive response from the fat boys.

Part 3 of the Big Boys!!! Really hope you guys are enjoying this story. This part is a little shower but definitely needed to get Liam added to the mix. Will be exploring what he decides to do in the next part or so… Hope you guys are looking forward to the next few parts. They will be going back to more gainer focused again looking at how the boys are fattening each other up so well. Hope you’re all enjoying it still!!

[rottindecay]

Hobie Brown Headcannons!

just some silly stuff ! >__<

warnings: i believe none.

[this is my first time ever posting smth like this..hopefully it’s good enough.]

*Reblogs, notes n comments r much appreciated >O<!*

Starting off strong- this man definitely craves physical touch. Like have you SEEN him with the anarch-kids?

He cant live with out ur touch like seriously, it would drive this man insane.

You love your personal space? He loves yours too.

Especially out in public. This guy will have a finger around one of your belt loops/belt, holding onto your bag or hand, even has his arm snaked around your waist or shoulder. He needs your touch!!

he loves to cuddle. More of a big spoon kinda guy because he finds it funny how his body just completely takes over yours, ykwim? (If ur shorter than him ofc)

but won’t mind being little spoon fr. Loves to have his head laying on your chest as you guys sleep in each others arms.

Speaking of sleeping- he’s a really heavy sleeper.

when he sleeps he’s sprawled all over the bed so good luck trying to wake him up to give you room.

When you do try to move him, he dosent move or make room for you LMAO

he just groans before pulling you into his embrace and resting his chin on your head fast asleep with his arm around your waist.

He’s an ass lover.

Wearing shorts around the house? He’s telling you you look good in them. Bending over to pick something up? He’s playfully slapping ur ass and snickering as he does so.

Like- if your on youre phone or reading a book or whatever and your laying on your stomach, he’s gunna come over and lay his head on ur ass like a pillow and take a nap or do smth on his phone.

Same with thighs fr

When you guys are out walking around or doing something and you have back pockets, expect his hand in your pocket.

Because he could keep you close and get to feel your ass. Win win in his book!

He loves ur ass!!!!!!

He adores little trinkets.

He has them all over his house

Like the first time you walked into his house, you just saw a lot of bowls laying around in places like in his room, kitchen, living room ext with just small little knickknacks he found or bought (stole)

Loves to receive and gift them to people hes close with.

He’s like a crow honestly.

90% of the time when you guys are hugging, he would go limp out of nowhere and now here you are trying to hold up a 6’5 180 lbs guy as he’s chuckling his ass off.

Puts his arm on your shoulder or head like an armrest.

Never calls u by ur first name. always has some nickname for you like “darling” (since he’s a Brit n all) or a nickname that connects to an embarrassing moment of urs LMFAO

He’s stupidly smart but dosent put effort in it ykwim?

Same goes for cleaning like yeah he could clean it, but why would he? He knows where everything is so it’s fine.

Also loves to hug u from behind and burry his face into your neck.

Also neck kissed Are his favorite thing like cmon now.

Honestly dosent care What pronoun you use. You could call him ball/ballself and he would look over at you without batting an eye to that.

Knows how to sing, just dosent do it. But if u ask nicely he would as he strums his guitar professionally!

He snores and drools everytime he sleeps.

Also luvs to do and wash ur hair for u.

Hobie has ADHD idc argue with the wall.

If ur ever doing chores around the house he’s 100% always going to help you with whatever your doing even if it’s something as simple as sweeping the floors. He dosent want you to think your juggling to many responsibilities.

Typa guy to know a guy. He knows a lot of people.

All his fingers are decorated with rings. Once you guys start to actually get serious he would give you one of his favorite rings since he dosent believe in marriage.

It’s nothing too big though, it’s just a simple silver band that’s obviously been shown some love throughout the years.

Dosent really label your guys relationship. Why would he need to box you in like that? It’s stupid. He knows he can trust you and you can trust him so there’s no need to be calling each other “boyfriend” and “girlfriend”

Makes playlists for you and burns them into CD’s

We all know he’s alr stupidly smart, yeah? Well he was the kinda kid to always be sleeping in class, not do any work and fail it even though he was the smartest mf there.

Also hated to do homework so he didn’t do it. Who was gunna stop him? NOBODY.

Also sucks at spelling tbh

Like he dosent care abt it. “Apple” is now “aple.”

Loves to DIY stuff like clothes, pins, patches, jewelry n much more!

He’s punk so he obviously listens to punk music, but he also listens to more than that. He hates consistency !!

I think he would be a really good cook he just won’t put effort in exploring that part of him LMAO

he obviously has really good sense of style. I think a lot of people forget he was FORMALLY A RUNWAY MODEL. HELLOOOO???

So if he sees shitty quality clothes, hes gunna point it out to you and suggest something else.

When being taken out on dates he dosent really do anything fancy, not his style yk?

But he does take you out on the most amazing places only a few know.

Shows you the coolest pubs hidden in alleyways, site seeing, walking around London in his dimension and just little fun activities.

(maybe even steal from big corporations too.)

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

01/21/2024 Crew Recap

Well holy shit all.

We finally fucking did it! We hit 75,000 signatures! That's crazy! The next goal line is literally twice that, and I know it seems daunting but don't give up, the more we get the more we show how much people want OFMD picked back up! We don't have to make that goal to show how passionate we are, we already have!

I know it feels like we've been doing this forever (12 days can you believe it?) but the scuttlebutt around deck is that we are making waves, and it's good to keep up the engagements so studio execs can see just how much we care!

We've been kicking ass on the #AdoptOurCrew hashtag on twitter and other platforms

===Articles===

I'm starting with articles tonight because this first one is phenomenal so please read it, it's by our very own @celluloidbroomcloset who if you follow them, you know their analysis is top notch. If it doesn't give you hope I don't know what will!

Our Flag Means Death And The Fight For Queer Joy

Cancelled Max Show Fans Utilize Netflix Billboard Trend, Creator Responds to Campaign Efforts

=== CREW KUDOS ===

We've had SO MUCH to be proud of about the last almost 2 weeks (oh my god I still cant believe it's been that long). Our efforts have been coming to fruition in a thousand different ways! Here's a couple more!

=First up, is the Fandom Project!=

As always thank you to @renewasacrew and in this case @tealknives and everyone else involved in this particular project for all your hard work!

Twitter / Tumblr

CW: FLASHING LIGHTS/ COLORS

=Next up, Cool Descriptions of all of you=

Thanks to @aproperpirate on Twitter for putting this together:

Just some cool descriptions of how unhinged we've all been, and I think you should be incredibly proud!

==How To Help==

Since this section has gotten to be a bit long, I'm separating it out into a separate post -- please go here for the details of the day that will be kept updated whenever I'm awake.

Here's the HOW TO HELP SECTION please visit it!

=Cast and Crew News=

Samba had a baby!

Also, Errol Shand (Ricky) has just been promoting the crap out of SaveOFMD Stuff on his IG so I just had to shout out to him here. What a guy.

=Cross Fandom Watch Party!=

Looks like there's gonna be some cross fandom watch parties on twitter you're welcome to tune in for Jan 23-26 on twitter. They'll be watching good omens in an effort to try and get engagement up with PrimeVideo. It sounds like it'll be similar to the LubeAsACrew but with Good Omens fans! Thank you to @Dandeebakes on Twitter for getting these organised!

Hashtags to use: #PirateOmens #AdoptOurCrew #SaveOFMD, and helps to @PrimeVideo

=== Contests ===

Looks like there's a contest for 2023 Reader's Choice Performer Of the Year, and you can go vote over here:

=Other Platform Recaps!=

It's been brought to my attention there are some other recaps going on on various platforms, feel free to check them out!

Twitter: @Mytabsclosed

Website: omfd-crew.com

These lovely folks have a full week wrap up if you wanna check it out here!

---------------------------------------------------------

A wonderful note from @RedsiesWorld on Twitter, something to remember is we are in fact fighting for our crews jobs as well (not just s3) and you're kicking ass!

---------------------------------------------------------

So all in all, 12 days of Polite Menacing has been BAT SHIT INSANE and every one of you should feel super fucking proud of all the hard work. This is a break checkpoint however ---PLEASE TAKE A BREAK IF YOU NEED IT (or even if you don't think you do). It's super important you take care of yourself! No one on the crew is going to be upset or disappointed that you took a break! We all are contributing in our own ways, so no need to worry if you're not doing the same as someone else! You are doing plenty!

Remember:

Drink Plenty of Water (Hydrate!)

Eat something good for you!

Get Some Sleep!

Do something Creative that makes you happy!

Go outside for a few minutes! (weather permitting)

Shit is hard, life's a dick, but you are stronger and more capable than you can possibly imagine, and you've got 10's of thousands of people out here rooting for you. All the love folks, wherever you are, whatever you're doing. You are wonderful and you are enough <3

---------------------------------------------------------

Tonight's random Rhys picture is what I can only assume is Murray getting a leaf blower blown in his face. You're welcome.

[bluephoric]

ridiculously long list of larry johnson hcs because fuck you he doesnt get enough love

Tw for depressing ass shit

- larry is a tired clumsy airhead, and as a result he always has SOMETHING spilled, wiped, or drawn on his clothes.

- undiagnosed adhd, and probably a few other things

- both him and sal collect bottlecaps, they like to make pins out of cool ones they find, often trading them like pokemon cards. they have multiple matching friendship ones. on common ones though, he likes to flatten and paint.

- larry's mental health generally sucks, but when things get really bad he stops caring about his physical safety, often pulling some reckless shit. even when he gets hurt from it, he doesnt seem to mind. Times like these kinda scare him, and he tries to avoid falling into them.

- despite seemingly "not caring about anything" (as he puts it) during these episodes, he's still fiercely protective of his friends and tries to be gentle with them, both physically and emotionally.

- callused hands, fingers yellowed from smoking.

- big fan of gas stations when he's high, practically raids that shit. one of his nicknames is "stoner jesus"

- he's openly bisexual and flirts with random people for fun. its usually something light. dorky pickup lines, stupid puns.. he Never expects it to be shot back at him but on the rare occasion it happens, he turns into a giggling mess.

- he actually pissed off travis even worse a few times with it, I could go into it further but this isnt a larvis post so i'll spare you all. For now.

- his favorite horror movies are the funny ones

- he isnt much of a drinker, mostly around holidays and just to get a little buzzed. spiked eggnog and fireball are his go-to's. Drunk christmas karaoke is one of his favorite things (he's constantly giving sal secondhand embarrassment). 2 words, mariah carrey.

- For awhile he genuinely tried to be a good student but because he was so far behind and his undiagnosed adhd, the teachers started to demonize him. Eventually he realized it didnt matter how hard he tried, so he just gave up. The only subject he likes is art, so that's where he focuses all his energy and actually tries.

- skips school sometimes but lisa tends to give him hell for it so he tries not to do it too often, mostly just skips certain classes if hes really not feeling it.

- almost always comes to school high

- his room is such a mess. sal tries to help him with it but he has similar struggles. whenever ash or todd come over, it becomes a group effort and shit gets done rather quickly. luckily no biohazards, so its not like his room really needs a DEEP clean but still. its nice.

- larry fucking LOVES jack black movies, also stupid stoner movies.

- Loves the arcade too, You'd think his favorite would be guitar hero, but that's more for sal. his favorite is mortal combat or those car racing games that you sit in with the steering wheel.

- larry cant cook for shit, hes always burning something, it always turns out gross and inedible. unless he's stoned, in which case he magically turns into a michelin star chef. weird ass combinations, but it always turns out really good.

- despite being shit at cooking, he still tries to help his mom with it, even though he mostly ends up just being in the way and she eventually shoos him out of the kitchen

- he smells super musky, with cheap cologne and the faint scent of weed

- when he was really little, he had a dinosaur onsie that he would wear everywhere, very rarely taking it off until it started to get too tight. he was beyond devastated when he realized he grew out of it, lisa had to pry it away from him in fear that he would accidentally destroy it. She keeps it in her closet collecting dust. Its one of the few things she kept from before jim disappeared. despite it bringing up memories of what things used to be like before he "left", she couldnt bear to throw it out.

- sometimes when larry needs comfort, he sneaks into her room and steals it temporarily. on sleepless nights, he zips it over his pillows as a makeshift pillowcase, its one of the few things that help him relax. It's always put back in place by the next morning. Lisa has no idea, and he's far too embarrassed about it to say anything to her.

- the only person who knows about this is sal because of their sleepovers. One night He was high as balls and got paranoid, when he tried to sleep it off the fear was just too much so away he crept, into lisa's room. Of course he made sal come with him, he sure as shit wasnt going alone.

- when questioned about it, larry refused to answer and so sal let it go figuring he would tell him when he was ready.

- Larry Harbors an obscene amount of guilt. struggles with sh off and on, tries not to relapse unless things get really unbearable. to prevent this, him and the SF gang (primarily ash) regularly doodle and sometimes paint on the places he's prone to harm.

- when he can feel himself slipping into an episode, larry makes it a point to braid his hair so it won't get matted. tries to brush it and rebraid it at least once a week, but often struggles to find the energy and lets it sit in for longer. Not to mention, a lot of the times he stops showering which makes it even harder to braid because of the greasiness.

- has given himself a few amateur stick and pokes. They look like shit, and he knows it but he's still very proud of them.

- the ink he uses for it fades pretty fast

- he's also tried to give himself piercings, but always fucks it up so he takes them out and slaps a bandaid over it

- collects different kinds of flavored chapstick, takes a bite out of them sometimes when he thinks no one is looking (ofc sal has caught him a few times but has never said anything)

- after he first met megan, he was scared shitless. slept with the lights on for the next few weeks and refused to shut the door when going to the bathroom, insisting to his mom on keeping the shower curtain open at all times (he tried to act chill about it around sal and it kinda worked. kinda.) after awhile he eventually calmed down but still finds himself getting really nervous whenever him and sal talk to a ghost, though he would never admit it.

- has a picture of his dad in a locket but rarely wears it because he's afraid he'll accidentally break it. always keeps it with him though, usually in his pocket, holding it as he walks.

- Despite his general demeanor he's quite the gentleman, always holding doors open and really courteous towards women. Most people don't expect it just based on his appearance, but Lisa raised him right.

- also he's hot as fuck.

- we all know larry is a metalhead, but what kind of metal is his favorite? It generally depends on his mood but id say sludge, thrash, and doom.

- You're telling me this man, who is depressed as fuck and also a stoner wouldnt eat up some electric wizard? saint vitus? bitch, please. I know quite a few albums that would bring him to his knees.

- And I know I'm prolly gonna get hate for this but I notice when a lot of other people write about larry (AND sal), they tend to lean towards nu metal or just plain emo. And while I don't think either of them would mind it, The lyrics and vocals of Sanity's fall feels more reminiscent of death or black metal and given the fact that SF is his favorite band, I don't think he would listen to that kind of stuff, at least not on a regular basis. Ash on the other hand definitely would.

[pumpkinsy0]

This one could get a bit chaotic but papercut going on a road trip? (And maybe some Pony trying to convince Darry to let him go??) Your headcanons keep me alive, i live and breathe papercut, so please keep up the good work or else I will die 💖

papercut road trip?? aw yeaaa baybeeee comin right up 🤵🏽‍♀️🍜

•it was def a spontaneous idea from curly, he was thinking one night and just wanted to drive somewhere, nowhere in particular just go around, he told tim and tim wasnt gonna fight him on it, if thats what curly wants thats his life, all he can hope is that he comes back in one piece (monkey d. luffy refrence⁉️)

•ik when he brought up the idea to pony it took a bit of convincing, not THAT much, but he still had to do it cause like, just a RANDOM road trip?????? pony joked that curly was trynna kill him, but curly did say they’d prolly pass the country side and he could take some pics as a remembrance so pony was down

•not gonna lie, ion know HOW, ponys ass is gonna convince darry to go, pony might be 18/19 but he is PUSHING his freedom here, ill tell u what tho it took a team effort from tim and buck (somehow), and darry probably slapped an airtag on pony or somethin so he knew where he was

•they were not taking curlys car, ill tell u that much, if u drove that thing for more than an hour i promise u theyre so dead before they even get to the 10th block out of ponys neighborhood, REGARDLESS OF HOW, pony kissed darry n soda goodbye (YES thats important to know)

•SKIPPING BORING DETAILS SO WE CAN ACTUALLY GET THE ON THE ROADTRIP, but they r STACKED w literally just snacks, no actual food, just chips, candy, juice and some water, lord help these two, they gonna crash on the highway🤦🏽‍♀️

•wether its a camcorder or just a regular ole camera, ponys documenting this, he also has a journal to write down his thoughts and draw, hes a man of many talents

•for every stop, when he can, he calls darry to let him know hes alive, even sends over post cards from the different places he’s at, stocks up on small lil knickknacks too!!curly also called to check in w tim and angela and pony made him send over letters too (curly HATESSSS writing letters)

•would it REALLY b papercut if i didnt say that one of em got them lost??? curly def cant read a map for shit and fucked up while pony was driving, that argument had ppl in other cars looking over

•they would take turns on who was driving but honestly just never let curly behind the wheel, be nearly missed an exit and pretty much drifted in the highway, curly would do WONDERS in a racing game, he did a “emergency” stop and almost catapulted pony out his seat when he was sleeping, hes such a lil asshole

•sometimes tho, they would just pull over completley and get in the back seat just to sleep, they had a blanket and like one pillow but its ok the one of em would just lay on the other, they had some pretty nice talks in there and pony wrote about it in his journal

•when they get to the country side, i could see pony having one of those nature books and finding what he could just to cross em off, hes a nerd like that, curly was way too fascinated by the insects to rlly make fun of him for too long

•took some good nature pics too, some silly ones as well, curly took some too!!

•one of em touched poison ivy, whoops

•how have i gone this long without mentioning that curly would def b the one blasting music, hes not the passenger princess, hes the passenger pain in the ass (pony doesnt wanna admit but video evidence proves other wise, he was singing too)

•pony is a pretty good driver i aint gonna lie, but maybe a lil too good, his eyes will NOT be leaving that road, curlys just gotta feed pony himself from the passenger

•they didnt pack enough clothes, they were def clothes shopping as they went, whoever car they took is a MESS by now

•at some point pony got sunburnt and curly was laughing at him bc it wasnt even all over his body, the sunburn just covered parts that his clothes didnt cover, had to make a stop at a gas station for sunscreen and aloe vera (if we r assuming curly packed enough money)

•they dont rlly go home for a while, they got too homesick

i need to stop here before i get anymore ideas,,,

[bloodlessbelmounte]

Eternity Will Bring You Near - Chapter 2

Masterlist

Summary:

Wade understood that Logan was from a world where Alpha, Beta and Omega were everyday terms, not exclusive to red-pilled incel fuckheads who kept inventing new performative male genders. Wade would’ve been classified as a Beta. Logan, however, was an Alpha - Wade’s read enough fanfiction and yaoi manga to know what that means. Though it doesn’t explain why Logan keeps sniffing him.

Pairing: Alpha!Worst Wolverine/Deadpool Genre: A/B/O, Smut, Domestic-ish Warnings: A/B/O Dynamics, Blood, Lots of Logan Biting, Mutual Masturbation/Frotting, Blow Job

Beginning Note: It's been a hot minute since I last wrote any smut and I can't remember if I've ever written a blow job scene before so I dont feel too confident. Also sorry for any errors. I didn't want to subject my girlfriend to the smut scene.

Cross posted to AO3

Welcome back frienderinos, so many kudos on the first chapter in twelve hours – the author hasn’t experienced that before. The comments are appreciated too, sadly this failed excuse of a human can’t take a compliment and so never knows how to respond. The validation made them quite happy though. How was that vacation by the way?

Well considering that I was working on this in my non-social times, pretty okay. I got a mosasaur tooth and screamed at Poseidon.

Nerd.

Oh fuck off. Don’t make me get the spray bottle.

Okay, okay! Fine.

Wade awoke – still clinging to the offered arm – to a solid mass against his back, an arm slung heavy across his waist and warm steady puffs of air on the back of his neck.

“Oh my God fellas, I’m being spooned by The Wolverine!” Wade whisper-yelled, trying not to wake the sleeping man and ruin the precious moment. In fact, he tried to nestle in closer to the older man and eliminate as much space as possible. Ass to crotch as nature intended. Logan remained blissfully asleep despite the jostling and nuzzled his nose into the nape of Wade’s neck, which sent an involuntary shiver down his spine. Don’t get a boner. Don’t get a boner. Don’t get a fucking boner. There was no way he could jack off in good conscience knowing a minor with fucking super hearing was sharing a roof with him. Oh he’s going to have to sound proof his room once they found a bigger place because fuck that. It was at that moment Logan simultaneously sniffled, groaned and canted his hips into Wade.

“Sweet,” he mumbled, his voice husky – thick with sleep.

Shit.

So much for that valiant effort. Abort mission. Abort mission! Wade extracted himself from Logan’s almost steel grip with a surprising amount of effort as the other man’s hold on him only tightened with his struggle. But Wade prevailed, and fell to the floor very gracefully with a dignified “Oof”. Needless to say Logan woke up rather confused, wiping the sleep from his eyes to better glare at the idiot tangled in sheets on the floor.

“Bub, it is too early in the day to be dealing with y'shit.” His voice still had that sleepy roughness to it. Could this man stop being sexy for even one second?!

“Well maybe don’t hump my ass in your sleep! I’m not into somnophilia and we have a child in the next room!” Wade hissed back, covering his lower half with the blanket he was tangled in, “Last thing I need is her being even more sus about me than she already is.”

Logan had the decency to look embarrassed, averting his gaze from the merc, “Sorry. I’ll sleep on-”

“Hey! I don’t mind the spooning. I love being little spoon. You don’t have to sleep on the floor.” In hindsight it was Wade’s fault as he had snuggled closer. “Now, if you don’t mind, I need to take a rather cold shower.”

Logan watched as Wade turned away and bundled the blanket around his waist. God, the merc confused him sometimes. Not a word about the stiffy he had when they were tied together but all modest about his morning wood. Wade escaped into the bathroom leaving Logan alone in the living room. He stretched out on the bed, joints cracking in protest.

He took a moment to lay there starfished as Wade’s scent and warmth clung to the bedding. Logan breathed in deeply. Gunpowder, leather, petrichor, the sour note of cancer and something sweet underlying that. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on but it was familiar and grew stronger when Wade was aroused. Yet that sweetness wasn’t there in the Void. He didn’t taste it in his blood. So maybe it was something about Wade’s universe that brought out the undertones. That sweetness had invaded his dreams, clouded his thoughts as he imagined burying his face into the scarred man’s neck, biting down to give him no escape as he drove his-

Yeah… shouldn’t linger on that.

Logan rolled off the bed and sat on its edge, scrubbing his face like he was physically trying to scrub away the inappropriate thoughts. He got up with a grumble and set to work putting the bed away, placing the bedding in a pile to the side. He had just moved the coffee table into place when the ladies of the house – Mary Puppins included – emerged from their room. Althea had Mary under one arm whilst her other hand wrapped around Laura’s elbow, allowing the teen to help her navigate. Logan laughed softly at how their pyjamas matched. Althea must’ve had spare sets. He briefly wondered how they were matching as he doubted it was Laura’s idea. The mystery would be solved later in the day during idle conversation with the elderly woman, Wade had sewn Braille into the labels so she could identify her clothes. Surprisingly thoughtful for someone who refers to her as ‘Blind Al’.

“Is Wade in here? I heard the shower going so it’s either him or the new guy in there.” Althea asked Laura as the girl deposited her in an armchair.

“Wade’s in the shower,” Logan answered for her, “would anyone like a coffee? Least I can do.”

“The offer itself is a damn sight more than what Wade does on the daily. I’ll take my coffee strong with sugar, no milk.” Althea responded, stroking Mary’s only patch of fur between the ears.

Laura curled her feet up under her and yawned, “I’ll just have a glass of water or juice.”

The bathroom door creaked open and Wade stepped out with nothing but a towel around his waist. Call it paternal instincts or whatever, Logan covered Laura’s eyes immediately. His eyes, however, roved over the merc’s form against his better judgement. Well toned musculature and lean. Built for his style of over-the-top gymnastic violence. If he had been an Omega in Logan’s universe he would have been highly sought-after by other mutant Alphas. Mary barked as her tailed wagged happily, breaking the older mutant out of his revere.

“I heard an offer for coffee?”

“Put some clothes on, Red.”

“I’m not naked. All my clothes are in Blind Al’s room, couldn’t exactly waltz in there and grab a change of clothes.” Wade countered, adjusting his towel ever so slightly, “Anyway, I like my coffee how I like my men: Strong enough to beat the shit out of me. No safewords.”

With that Wade exited into the bedroom and Logan lifted his hand off Laura with a sigh. He walked over to the fridge to find the young mutant her juice. Inside, he noticed a few bits and pieces that could be scraped together to cook enough breakfast for everyone, so he grabbed those too.

I’ll stop you there, dear author, because I know that you don’t know how coffee or tea is made in America since you’re British and have those doodads called ‘Kettles’.

Squirt. Squirt.

Fuck, that burns! What have you got in that bottle? Acid?

Boiled water from my kettle you cunt.

Now that’s just mean.

I told you to fuck off.

Wade re-emerged from the bedroom dressed in jeans, some kinda horse graphic white t-shirt with a red and black cardigan. He was greeted to the smell of freshly made coffee as well as eggs and bacon. Logan was stood over the stove tending to a saucepan and a frying pan while Laura buttered toast and put more pieces of bread in the toaster.

“In the words of that bad bitch Nobara: ‘Rejoice, boys’. For I have returned to save you from the mundanity of Honey Badger’s inner monologue,” Wade joked, taking the only coffee mug on the counter top, which he assumed was for him, and sat down on the sofa. “So what’s the itinerary for today? Jointly sign-up for sobriety programmes? Creating false identities for you’s twos? Booking apartment viewings?”

“We’re taking Laura clothes shopping and, yes: getting the TVA to give us different identities. I don’t need your Logan’s enemies on my ass.” Logan replied with a pointed look, flipping the bacon.

“Oh Snookums, he’s not my Logan. There’s only one Wolverine in my heart and that’s you.” Wade kissed the tips of his pointer fingers and shot them in Logan’s direction.

Logan abruptly turned away grumbling to himself and focused on cooking breakfast.

Look – we need to speed this up because we’re at nearly one-thousand-five-hundred words and I’m not missing out on fucky-fucky action in this chapter. Show don’t tell is going out the window for this bit. So here’s the run down: We have a lovely family breakfast consisting of scrambled eggs (I would say I like mine fertilised but I can’t exactly do that on account of all the cancer ravaging my body) on toast with a side of bacon cooked by GirlDad and DadGirl. Logan threw on some of Blind Al’s dead husband’s clothes. She was a widower, weird I know. Never took her for the type of girl to settle down. Anyway, back on track. The TVA was our closest stop on the day’s list so we paid them a little visit first. Turns out they had already set up bank accounts and identities for the timeline hoppers. Very efficient, very mindful, very demure of them. Logan Howlett was now James Logan – not abundantly imaginative of the author. Laura got to keep her first name and was given Logan as a last name. We then went on a fathers-daughter bonding shopping trip to Hot Topic and some place that sells outdoorsy clothes. And after all of that we sat our asses down to look online at potential apartments until there was a knock at the door.

Thank all that is holy that I’m not having you abducted again.

Why do you hate me so?

Who insulted me in the intro to the previous chapter?

Don’t blame me for your self-deprecating tendencies. You wrote that monologue.

…

Wade opened the door. Outside was, well, everyone. Peter, Vanessa, Colossus, Negasonic, Yukio, Dopinder and the others. They must have arranged it all in the group chat. God, Wade really needed to get a new phone already. It had been three months since the last one got lost on top of a car at the dealership. Peter had a crate of beer in his hands.

“Hi Wade,” Yukio waved with her always bright smile.

“Hi Yukio,” Wade gave her a smile and wave in kind, “Before y’all come barging in here, there’s some people I’d like you to meet. Peter met one of them already. Now they have super hearing so don’t talk all at once in case you spook them.” Wade instructed as he ushered them in.

Negasonic was the first to react, brows furrowed and jaw set, “When the fuck did you get to know Wolverine? He’s meant to be on a mission right now. Are you slacking off, old man?”

Wade stepped in front of her, his face set in a somehow playful scowl, “Cool your jets teen rebellion. This here is my Wolverine,” He stood behind the kitchen chair Logan was sat and patted one of the other man’s nippleoons. He noticed how intently Vanessa watched the interaction, her gaze lingering on his hand.“He’s from a different universe. Me and this fella saved the Marvel Multiverse together.”He gestured to Laura who was seated next to Logan, “And this munchkin here who is about your age and just as spiteful is Laura, your Logan’s biological lab-conceived daughter. But things for her are a little complicated because she’s technically travelled back in time. Last but not least,” Wade bent down and picked the dog up from the floor, “We have Mary Puppins aka Dogpool. In our efforts to save the world she tragically lost her father to… other Deadpools.”

“Shame really, the Deadpool Corps are great,” Peter piped up with a grin.

“Of course they are, they’re all me,” Wade motioned for everyone to find a seat, “That’s the three newest members of our group introduced. Shall we all settle in? Or are we all going to stand around awkwardly?”

Wade took the available seat next to Logan and was somewhat surprised Vanessa came to sit next to him. For the most part they talked to the people around them, Wade was definitely trying to avoid any small talk with her. He still wasn’t used to the new dynamics of their relationship turned friendship. How do you navigate going from engaged and failing to start a family to just friends? Especially when you didn’t start off as friends. There’s no baseline to fall back on. Can’t exactly do the old routine of overtly sexual flirting and trauma bonding when she had a new fella. At some point pizza had been ordered and everyone helped themselves to it.

Logan, apparently, read Wade’s hesitance differently, “Give me the fucking dog, talk to the girl.” He demanded nodding towards Vanessa, his hands already gently grasping Mary and apprehended the pup before turning to Laura who laughed and poked Mary on the nose.

There goes his anchor. His hands gingerly rested on the table now that they were empty. What should he say? What can he say? Was there anything to salvage? Wade glanced over to Vanessa and accidentally made eye-contact which caught her attention.

“Oh, hi,” She said softly, humour in her tone and a gentle smile on her lips, like she thought she’d spook him.

Wade forced a smile, “Hi.” It came out as a wheeze as if the lump he felt in his throat was a physical barrier not a mental hurdle. He cleared his throat to dislodge it.

“You’ve been busy.” She glanced over his shoulder, still grinning.

He nodded. What the fuck should he say? What would she want to hear? Perhaps…

“I did it for you. Even if you don’t want me, I did it for you.”

Her smile dropped briefly, her hand enveloping his with a reassuring squeeze, “You did it for all of us. Can I have a word with you in the hallway?”

“Uh, yeah sure.”

Wade followed her into the hallway outside the front door. She had her arms crossed as she looked up at him, eyebrows pinched together like they always did when she was concerned about him.

“What was that? Seemed like you were masking in there.”

“I’m bad with complicated emotions, we both know that Ness.”

Vanessa snorted, looked to the floor and pinched the bridge of her nose. Oh she was getting frustrated. Not good. “If you’re trying to make your boyfriend jealous, please don’t use me. I don’t need the drama.”

“B-Boyfriend?” Wade choked, utterly blind sided by the statement, “What boyfriend? You’re the only one here with a boyfriend.”

“Right, so that’s not what’s going on then,” She mumbled to herself. She grasped his arm and made him properly look at her, “What’s the situation with Logan then? You were draping yourself all over him when we arrived.”

“Nothing! I like him too much and he hates me but we kissed-”

“You kissed?”

“Yeah, it was after the whole sacrificing ourselves thing and I was afraid he died. Obviously he didn’t but he had been hurt and I was just so relieved he was okay and there was the thrill of surviving against all odds-” Wade quick fire rambled, rubbing the back of his neck while blood rushed to settle across his cheeks.

“You love him.”

“No I-”

“Wade, I know you. When you fall it’s hard and fast-”

“Just like how I fuck.”

“Exactly. The way you look at him is just like how you looked at me in the beginning. Logan looks at you the same way, I’ve seen it at that table. But I’ll let him talk to you about that himself.”

A cough came from the doorway which made Wade startle and jump as Logan stood there, hip cocked and smirking. He hadn’t noticed that Vanessa had left the door ajar.

And how was Logan able to sneak up on me when he had metal bones and weighed at least four hundred pounds?

Wade looked backed to Vanessa for an explanation.

“Super hearing.” She said simply.

“You set me up!” Wade cried in faux outrage.

“I just got the ball rolling,” she shrugged, she patted Logan on the arm as she moved past him back into the apartment, “it’s in your court now big guy.”

The door shut behind her.

“C'mon, let’s go somewhere actually private,” Logan stated, grabbing Wade by the wrist and pulling him down the hallway and up the stairs.

Wade was struggling to keep up, tripping over his own feet and stumbling up the steps as he was dragged behind the older mutant. He had to catch himself on the handrail a couple times to stop himself from defying gravity and falling upwards. How was Logan going so fast?

Was he taking them two at a time?

In nearly no time at all they had made it up onto the roof. The cold evening air welcoming them. As the door slipped shut behind Wade, Logan turned to him and slammed a hand onto the door boxing the younger man in.

Wade turned to the arm caging him in, “Kabedon,” He murmured addressing you readers, “Veteran fans of shojo anime and manga will know what I mean.”

Logan lightly gripped Wade’s chin and made him face forwards, “I know what y'mean, I did live in Japan for a while. I know the language. But I’m not much for words. I prefer action.”

He wasted no time in capturing the merc’s lips, his grip moving to instead cup Wade’s cheek, a calloused thumb tracing over the scarred tissue beneath. If Wade could physically melt into a puddle on the ground, he would have done as tension he had been unconsciously holding seeped out of his muscles. Taking the bull by the horns as it were,his hands rose up to tangle his fingers into Logan’s kitty eared cowlicks trying to deepen the kiss, noses bumping into each other.

He should definitely grow them out, he looked so cute with bigger tufts when he was younger.

Logan nipped at the younger mutant’s bottom lip. One of those little fangs of his nicked it, drawing just a drop as blood that was quickly swept up by a flick of his tongue. Wade’s lips parted in a gasp that Logan took full advantage of. A hand fell onto one of Wade’s hips, pulling him into the other while he was being pressed into the door. Logan rutted into him, his arousal brushing against Wade’s.

Yeowza. Talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place.

Unfortunately, despite being functionally immortal, both mutants still needed to breathe. The two broke apart, Wade panting and oxygen starved focused on bucking his hips to match Logan’s rhythm. Logan traced mouth along Wade’s jawline and down into his neck where he started to nip and lick at the rough skin, teasing out moans and groans. Wade gave a particularly harsh tug to the hair still in his grip when the bites got hard enough to break skin. Then there was hands working Wade’s jeans open, pushing the offending material along with his boxers down far enough for his cock to spring free.

“I’m not sure you know this Logi, but I’m not a natural bottom – as the readers have seen me say nearly a thousand times already – and I very much doubt you are either, being an Alpha and all that.” Wade babbled. How was he still coherent in this situation? He’s about to have Wolverine’s hand on his dick. “So I don’t know what the procedure is here. How are we going about this?”

Logan tore himself away from where he was futilely trying to litter Wade’s throat with marks that healed far too soon, his pupils blown into molten tar and a faint hint of crimson tinting his lips, “I guess I’ll just have to train ya, Princess.” He growled.

Wade’s brain must have short circuited because in the next instance Logan had freed his own member and had it pressed against Wade’s. It was longer than his by a good few inches, and Wade wasn’t average (nor was he below it). It was thicker too.

Hoe my God! The glimpse I got yesterday through those sweats did not do him justice. That’s a weapon. He wants that in me?!

Logan held up his hand, eyebrow raised expectantly. Wade gathered the saliva in his mouth and gave it the ol’ Huktuh into the waiting palm. Logan wrapped that hand around both their cocks and started stroking them slowly. Wade whined at the glacial, almost teasing pace, one of his own hands reached down to thumb at Logan’s tip which was starting to leak precum. Wade’s, however, was dripping wet which added to the slick glide. He briefly wondered what Logan thought of the texture of his dick against his, of the hand giving attention to his head. But again his mind went blank when Logan picked up the pace and began to thrust up into their hands. Wade’s head fell against the door with a thud, his eyes rolling back. Fuck. The friction felt amazing. Logan grunted lowly as he worked their shafts, his mouth back on Wade’s throat.

“Logan- shit. I imagined something like – ah – this happening when your suit exploded yesterday. Hngh- Dreams really do come true,” Wade groaned, fucking up into Logan’s tightened grip.

Logan huffed out a chortle, raising his head only to rest his forehead against Wade’s, “Here I thought I’d found away to shut y'up, Bub.”

Wade’s gaze darted between the other man’s eyes and lips, his tongue peaking out to wet his own, “Make me then, Honey Badger.”

There was a growl from the mutant, almost primal sounding, followed by hungry searing lips seeking to consume him. And God, did Wade want to be consumed. To let this man take as much as he wanted from him then and there. But it was all getting to be too much, he was getting close. The telltale signs of his balls tightening and the heat pooling low in his stomach. He abandoned his attentions on the other man’s tip to clutch his back.

Wade yanked on Logan’s hair, regrettably pulling the other away, saliva bridged between them, “I’m gonna- fuck! I’m gonna cum,” He whimpered.

Logan readjusted his grip, letting go of his own straining cock to focus solely on Wade’s, “It’s okay. I got y'. That’s a good boy.”

Wade’s vision whited out as he came with a shout. His fingers raking through Logan’s hair and across his clothed back. His back arching like a bow drawn taut while Logan wrapped his hand over the head of Wade’s cock. He slumped against the door, took a moment to catch his breath and cracked his eyes open. When had they shut? Afew seconds later the world came into focus but oh he was not mentally prepared for the sight before his eyes.

There was Logan licking his cum of that glorious hand like it was a fucking treat not to be wasted while his other hand lazily worked his still present hard on.

“I think I must’ve died and gone to heaven,” Wade panted, “Because no way is this real.”

Logan just grunted in acknowledgement. Either he was close or concentrating on getting there.

“Would you like a hand with that? I might not be the Blowjob Queen of Saskatoon but I can give Truthful Timmy a run for his money.” Wade offered, pushing off the door to flip their positions.

“Do y'think y'can take me, Mouth?” Logan teased with a grin.

“As long as you don’t knot my throat and give me a really unfortunate case of lockjaw while we have guests over.”

“Y' don’t have to worry about that Bub, only happens when the person I’m fucking is ovulating.”

Wade dropped to his knees and lifted the material of Logan’s shirt and under-shirt to reveal those Hawaiian rolls, finally running the flat of his tongue up them like he’d been dying to do, “So what you’re telling me is that if I ever wanted to be stuffed like a Twinkie fit to burst, I just need to buy some sort of pheromone or hormone perfume. Noted.” His teeth grazed over one of the muscles.

Gotta love ‘em while they’re still there ‘cause I’m gonna make sure Wolvie is properly hydrated.

Wade nuzzled into the coarse hair of Logan’s groin. He took a deep breath, savouring the heady musky scent as drool pooled in his mouth. He lightly gripped the other’s member with both hands, mouthing along his length, teasing kitten licks and kisses. He paid special attention to lap at the underside of the tip. Logan groaned making Wade glance up at him. His eyes were squeezed shut, fists balled up at his sides.

“You can touch me, you know,” He snickered then swept his tongue from base to tip before enveloping it in the warm wet heat of his mouth.

“Fuck!” Hands shot down to grip his head, thighs twitching in what Wade could only assume was restraint.

This is where I miss having hair at times. Maybe I should alter one of my spare masks to have a mouth hole. That’ll give him some leverage.

Relaxing his throat, he tried to take in as much as he could. His jaw already ached. Damn he was out of practice. But then he’d never had a log quite like this before. Good thing his gag reflex was no longer existent. Wade hollowed his cheeks and began bobbing his head, taking in an inch or two more when he could, spit leaking from the corners of his mouth. He removed his hands and rested one on Logan’s hip, moaning and pulling him forward. The other dropped to massage his balls. A choked gasp came from above him. The grip on his head tightened, holding him in place as Logan began thrusting, shallowly at first but quickly becoming rougher. Wade choked when Logan hit the back of his throat but the whorish outcry from the other made it worth it.

Relax, breathe through the nose.

He tried to swallow and tighten around the thick length, rewarding him with desperate bucks and low growls.

“Shit. Fuck. Can I cum in y'mouth? Would y'do that for me? Swallow everything I give ya, Red.”

Wade moaned, eyelids fluttering as he made himself take Logan down to the base. A few more thrusts and salty bitter spend spilled into Wade’s waiting maw which he eagerly swallowed down. He pulled away, working to clean up whatever lingered. Trembling hands dragged him up onto his feet. Logan wasted no time in drawing him close to lap up the cum that had dribbled down his chin, catching him in a kiss, the taste of both of the mingling. It was messy but brief.

“You nasty. I like that.” Wade heaved when they separated.

Logan gave him a crooked smile, humming in amusement, “We should get back down to the party. They’re there for y'after all.”

“I don’t want our little romp to end though, Wolvie.” The younger pouted.

“There’ll be more to come later. I’ve got to break y'in don’t I?”

Logan shot him a wink and tucked himself back into his pants, Wade doing the same.

“We uh, should probably brush our teeth when we get in. So Laura doesn’t uh… So we don’t make her uncomfortable.” Wade suggested as they made their way back down to the apartment.

“Won’t stop us from smelling like sex, Bubba. Her sense of smell is just as strong as mine.” That response was far too casual.

By the time they had made their way back, the party was winding down. Vanessa smirked, eyeing both men with a knowing look. She had been in conversation with Laura who had turned pale when they entered, her face a mix of abject horror and disgust that comes with the realisation your parent is boning. Poor kid. To give her a small mercy he retreated to the bathroom with Logan hot on his tail. He tossed a bottle of sandalwood body spray to him while he got to work brushing his teeth more thoroughly than he had ever done before in his life. Once he was done they swapped. Most of the evidence of their activities erased. What a shame, he would have loved to brag about it but he didn’t want to traumatise the kid any further.

It wasn’t long before people were calling it a night and saying their goodbyes. Wade gave Vanessa an extra tight hug and a whispered thanks. Really, what would he do without her? Laura had evacuated to the safe space of the bedroom with Al and Mary, which was understandable. Wade and Logan had another beer each then set up the sofa bed. And when they settled in for the night, Logan pulled the merc to rest against his chest.

“In case it wasn’t clear, I like ya. I can’t say it’s love ‘cause I’m honestly not sure. But moments like this and the roof, I could get used to it.”

“So should we be looking for four bed or three bed places. Oh! I should ask Hank if he can invent some sort of sound barrier device for us!”

Logan rolled his eyes, “Dumbass.”

Again the ending with a bedtime scene!

Hey, someone needs to remind the readers to go to bed. Anyway next chapter will take place after a short time skip okay?

Fine! But there better be some penetration or I swear I’ll-

Squirt.

[neeeeeoposts]

Ohhhh, your FoulWilt art is so adorable! Do you have any headcanons for them, either as individuals or as a couple?

YOU BET I FUCKNG DO😈😈😈😈 also thank you sm 💕💕

but i'll do individual hc first before couple hc 💁‍♀️

also these hcs are most closer to my human au (see some of my doodles for their designs :P) so some headcanons may be inaccurate to a more canon version of them

just a warning; this is really freaking long so just saying-

v

• one of the episodes already portrayed this (S2E3: Where There's a Wilt There's a Way) but Wilt has this like rlly bad mentality where he must help anyone and everyone he can, takes everyones health and wellbeing before his own type of thing

• willing to give up his kidney if you asked him to

• sleeps in some of the most impossible positions known to man (Coco found him asleep in the closet once)

• either has flexiable as hell or has some stiff ass limbs, no in between

• can't sing well, but dances extremely good (from what he could learn from Frankie's computer)

• wilt helps Eduardo w his insomnia sometimes (I HC THAT ED HAS INSOMNIA STFU I THINK ITS CUTE)

• on the same topic on the last one, wilt also sews any of eduardo's broken plushies together when he's not around

• cooks like a god (pastries, not so much tho)

• probably forgot his birthday once or twice

• pansexual (he had to fight for his life to explain that he DOES NOT KISS THE COOKING PANS to Bloo)

alr larry's turn 🤭🤭

• didn't actually know HE was the reason for wilt's broken arm and eye, so when he found out, he was like- spending the whole month trying to both make it up to Wilt (despite the fact wilt repeated that he forgave larry) and was extremely guilt-ridden that he was basically isolating himself

• cant cook for shit, its almost sad

• probably the one to teach wilt how to say no and every cuss word known to man

• closeted hamilton fan (or just musicals in general), but he mostly enjoys dubstep or just VERY LOUD songs in general

• flower enthusiast, daisies are his favorite

• probably shaved his head once because he thought he'd look good but never again

• i think he smells like peaches ☝️😲

• bisexual (has dated before, sometime pre-Good Wilt Hunting ep then broke up lmao)

couple hcs🤭🤭🤭

• before dating they would actively avoid each other while also desperately trying to see each other too

• larry is touch starved and wilt is overly affectionate (via touch and words) so it works out basically

• i think they live on opposite sides of the house, so they make up for it by giving each other gifts and letters either whenever they see each other or some magical delivery system

• when they have sleepovers wilt has the life changing moment of what it feels like to actually sleep in a bed

• on that note, wilt is a massive cuddle person and will hang onto larry like a koala while asleep (trying to pry him off is nearly impossible)

• Frankie and Coco write fanfics about them, you cant tell me otherwise

• Their relationship developed from really long glances to the other from across the room to just holding hands in public and that was enough for Frankie to realize theyre dating

• i think i saw this in a fic once but the two would basically give very back-handed 'compliments' every time they saw each other, which developed into "dont you EVER FUCKING say that to him" when the other is insulted

• Rarely play basketball against each other, but when they do Larry is extremely fucking careful that wilt gets upset because he "isnt giving his best efforts" (Larry loses on purpose anyways for Wilt's sake)

• is there a term for when both partners in a relationship have massive problems and go to the other for advice and comfort? because i think thats them

• wilt has no knowledge of relationships whatsoever so trying to explain what a "pussy" is to him is very difficult ("like a cat?" "...no.")

• larry, with the help of nearly everyone in the whole house because theyre all broke as shit, bought wilt a prosthetic arm for his birthday and wilt sobbed on larry for a whole hour

• larry likes to throw wilt over his shoulder very often bc hes light as a feather and its just funny to him

• i think i just really like the "tall skinny guy" x "even taller and built guy w man boobas"

• wilt rarely swears unless needed to while larry says at least once per sentence

• both are awkward af so asking each other out is like a mental battle to the death

• mac, goo and bloo will spend hours trying to analyze a corkboard if they're in a relationship or not (when they do they will place traps for wilt and larry like a mistletoe)

• larry draws REALLY FREAKIGN good and when wilt found out he begged larry to post it somewhere (it blew up) and now every letter larry writes to wilt has a small doodle of something on the back or in the corner as per his request

• wilt gets flustered very very very easily and its really funny to larry

• watch movies together and either larry falls asleep on wilt or wilt goes to get more popcorn then never comes back because everyone needed a favor from him

• Jackie Khones is a certified detective on trying to figure out on what the actual hell is going on between the two (probably worked w Mac again in order to figure that out)

• Wilt is a dog person but Larry is a car person, that is one of the main (and probably only) arguments between them

• i already said wilt was a good cook so he'll always make larry small snacks (because Herriman forbids people making their own meals for some reason) and larry will silently cry of happiness for a moment bc "wilt's too good for him"

• wilt blinks like a frog when he zones out and larry also finds it funny

• but on the opposite note, wilt found out that larry will sway side to side when idly standing or zoning out and likes to point it out whenever he does it (wilt finds it funny and cute at the same time)

• they save the corny nicknames for when theyre alone, but publicly will call each other stuff like "shorty" and "carebear" (wilt likes to call larry carebear because he's somehow more caring than anyone hes ever known and is nearly as tall as a bear)

• Wilt scheduled times designated to shit-talking Duchess with eduardo, coco, bloo, mac and frankie (Larry had no idea who Duchess even was but when he met her for the first time he never wanted to punch someone so bad)

• Wilt fish-kisses (looks like a 3) and Larry kisses w tongue

• madame foster now hosts 'pride parties' in june which was inspired by the couple so that residents of the house could feel comfortable while living there (and she got all the tea about them from Frankie)

ok tahts all bye

thanks so much for requesting <3

[cryingteacup]

Creepy pasta sleeping habits

I am such a god damn nerd okay.

Jeff

Barely. He'll stay up all night doing the dumbest stuff shit online. you can practically hear the sticky ipad noises echoing through the hallway. Just the squish on his fingers tapping the dirty screen. He plays those games that have adds like "i bet you cant beat level pink or you're legal good" just to prove himself.his ipad is laggy from the amount of viruses hes gotten from sketchy websites. He'll sleep in till 4pm then deny when everyone asks if he's tired. He trudges through his tasks, yawning, dark bags contrasting with his pale ass skin. Someone will be like "Hey dude are you okay you seem tired" and he'll blow tf up on them. He usually sleeps with his eyes open out of convenience, but When he does need a good night sleep he needs a sleeping mask because he has no eyelids.

Ben

Ben stays up with jeff on discord calls. He has shitty ass mic quality so when you pass by either of their rooms its just garbage noise. His bed sheets are stained with cheeto crumbs and he has enough stuffed animals to create a new makeshift mattress, so when he sprawls out all of them just go flying off the bed. Has a nightstand filled with various bowls and cups he just never bothered put away. Along with 50 empty uncleaned monster cans that he keeps for "decoration" (they are full of bugs)

Toby

He has a fan in his room to create white noise. He gets really anxious during the night. (thanks slender man lol) he has one bed sheet. One pillow. One blanket. No posters. No books, no nothing. He has a phone, but instead up spending all night on social media, he just. binges. He knows everything about a show before everyone else because he just binges, he cant function until he finishes the show.his favorites are Hallmark movies. They remind him of the movies his mom was always playing on the tv. He spoiled shows so often that people had to pay him 20 bucks each to stop. After a while though he just felt he HAD the binge all the shows and then he had a panic attack because he didn't sleep for three days and now he goes to bed everyday at 9.

Jane

Only person here who has a skin care routine. She takes a shower. Sets out new comfortable clothes for sleep on her bed so when she gets out of the shower so she doesn't need to pick out pajamas. She also tosses a towel in the dryer so its warm and fluffy for when she gets out.she has a 14 step skin care routine full of various moisturizers and serums. She also has a jade roller. Shes very incecure about her skin since she got her burns, so she always puts in extra effort to feed her skin good stuff. She likes to watch a show before she goes to bed just to unwind. She used to doom scroll but then she read a artical about the effects and stopped like the queen she is. Her go to's are true crime, the crown and bojack horseman. Shes a back sleeper because feeling her body touching while shes sleeping makes her hyper aware and in turn, makes her uncomfortable.

Hey u. STOP OMG DONT LEAVE YETPLEASEOMGPLEASE

if you liked the story send stuff to my inbox pls n ty

[imlivinginyourtrashcan]

Gat any juicy ✨aPoCaLyPsE✨ aus??? (Any other are welcome too, I will eat.)

GO ALL OUT, DO IT.

Ahh!!! Ok. I dont personally have any apocalypse aus, HOWEVER!!!! I can make up headcannons for how I see things going in this hypothetical

Now the rules I personally am going to use is Zombieland and Last of Us. Im not doing slow zombie shit thats BORING!!!! Alright, here we go.

Cartman:

The first one to be bit out of the boys

Look, Zombieland rule number one right here

Tbh he thought the person who bit him escaped the looney bin

He didnt care

...until he realized his mom was turned

Fuck

So naturally he goes to Kyles

Got there last tho

Kyle let him in

Look, he may hate Cartman but he felt bad!

The turning process took 3 days after he was bit

Day one was the show of pink eye, eye crust and a slight green tint

Second day he looks worse, eyes look all hazy and he looks grener and more deshevled

Third day; yeah hes turned, foaming at the mouth

Butters went to check on him since hes the medic and it ended with Kyle killing him and Kenny getting bit

Kyle:

Didnt know the apocalypse was happening for a good while

Just knew he wasnt going to school for a while so win win

That was until they were out one day and saw a zombie themselves

Oh yeah theyre OUT!!!

Making a break for the house Kyle had to watch his parents get bit

Picked up Ike and was outie like a belly button!!!

Had to gear up on survivalist stuff

Guns, medical equipment, stuff like that

Somehow became the leader of a small group including himself, Ike, Kenny, Stan, Butters, and Cartman.

They stayed at his house until they discover Tolkien's alive

Now they on their way to his house (which has more space and food)

Either the last to be bitten or a survivor

Very distrusting of new people after the cartman incident

Or just people in general

Checks DAILY for bites

If someone's found with a bite they talk to Kyles PEW PEW

Stan:

Co leader of Kyles little resistance thing

Goes out with him on hunts or killing sprees

Found his house after his sister was turned

Not the first few bit but he def doesnt survive

Its either a self sacrifice thing or something depressing where Kyle and Stan are crying

Kyle has to leave him behind which really sucks :(

But they arent having another Cartman situation.

During the apocalypse his drinking problem gets worse

Several times where the group was thinking of just leaving him cuz hes a liability but Kyles like

"No dude hes my friend >:("

Kept Sparky around to sniff for stuff and as a general alert system

Someone at the door?

BARKBARK BARK

Someones turned?

BARKBARKBARK

Stuff like that

OOOOO Sparkys gonna be SADDD when Stan dies

Or he'll just die with him

Idk

Kenny:

Second to be bit and turned

Before that he was the rations, weapons, drinks, etc guy

Main weapon was a flame thrower

Why? Cuz its cool as hell

Def gives tallahassee from Zombieland in a survival scenario

That man will do CRAZY SHIT

God i LOVE Tallahassee!!!!

Shame Kenny got bit

They basically were like

"Yeah no"

And threw him outside.

Then Kyle and Stan became the new scavengers

Poor Kenny :(

Butters:

Both his parents turned so he was outie like a belly button

Left with more truama than he had

Ended up becomming the group medic

The boys try to do everything to keep him from turning

Their efforts are successful until they make their way to Tolkiens

Then he gets bit by a zombie cuz hes frozen in some kinda fear

Kenny returns and CHOMP

Then the groups like "FUCK" and run away

He did survive for a while so like, good on him

But his ass cant use a weapon for shit

Tweek:

It could go both ways with him

Either he dies really early

Or dies really late

But i do think hes a hermit whos gone crazy in bith scenario

He def things Craig and his friends are dead

Hes survived on eating coffee beans and no sleep

Eventually tho i think he cant take it anymore and runs for the zombie hoarde

A certain someone does save him tho and hes in a camp with a few other people

Still bonkers crazy tho

Man thinks hes in heaven

Talking for hours abt how excited he is to see Craig

Poor dude is nuts

Craig:

The one who saved Tweek

Has a resistance of his own with Dougie, Wendy, Terrance Mephesto, Bebe, Clyde, Damien, Mike and Pip (yes Pip is alive in this au. Fight me)

They have a pretty big camp, too.

Theyve essentially been glamping for half the apocalypse

Staying in the mephesto place for like, the entirety of the apocalypse

Pip informs Craig on Tweeke mental state very often (Pip is the medic and group therapist)

Craig is almost never at the base cuz hes out getting stuff

Makes sure to go out in something the zombies cant bite through too

Just in case

Leaves Stripe in Pip's care, ends up bonding with him too

"Yknow frenchie? You arent that bad"

"Uhm..im not french, but thank you!"

On a mission to find Tricia since they seperated

Least he found Tweek

Main weapon is a sniper rifle. Likes hanging out on rooftops and going zombie hunting that way.

Informs the group on the staus of the people hes seen as Zombies.

"So uh... Stan, Cartman, Kenny, and Butters turned.."

And the whole groupis just like 😨

Clyde:

If you think this man is lasting long you are a FOOL

That man would see something truamtic

Cry

And get eaten by a zombie hoarde

I dont see him contributing much to a group at all

Just staying inside cuz hes a wuss

They had to force him out

And thats when he fucking died

Jimmy:

Staying in Tolkiens house with him

Theyre pretty set on food and water

Will go out with Tolkien if they need to get stuff

Can use crutches as a close combat weapon

Trying to keep the situation light

Joking abt everything to make Tolkien feel better

More than happy to welcome the rest of the boys into their home

Survivor, yes, im biased

Tolkien:

Stayed pretty much unaffected by the apocalypse, lucky fuck

Goes out with Jimmy if they need anything

Became the new leader of the resistance

Kyles now on medic duty

Also a survivor

Makes sure weapons are all good and everything

Very good with the organization aspect of the apocalypse.

House is also very spacious

Overhears mephesto working on a cure so that keeps his morale high

Nichole is also staying with him and Jimmy, but mostly for security.

Girl can kick ass

Hope you enjoyed, anons!