#but she still did truly seem to love Oz and be attracted to him at the time

[pearlofthewoods]

The purplish, blueish, lilac colour that lights Buffy the Vampire Slayer throughout the whole series might explain why BTVS felt so Bi as a show to me in a way that I could never quite explain.

This colour. If you know you know. It’s like everything was lit by weak moonlight, or the slayer and vampires existed in the perpetual twilight.

For real what is it with vampire media, and light purple/bluish tints? Between this and the twilight saga… I dunno maybe it’s just me, or maybe vampire media is just inherently queer.

Obvs bisexuals don’t own the colour purple, but as the intersecting/between shade in the bi flag and how this lighting signals twilight (the time/world between day and night) I think it’s a pretty rad parallel.

[barbatos-sama]

thoughts after one watch:

i was actually nervous for this episode bc you could tell from the season preview it was a court episode but we didn't know who was being put on trial. me and some other ppl in the fandom were afraid that we'd get an episode where royals were punished for mingling with the lower class (like stollas and oz) but it was actually specifically about bliitz's use of the grimoire.

we got to see all seven sins IN THE SAME ROOM (except for luci since the shows aren't allowed to cross over, he was referenced though).

we actually also got a huge lore drop that satan actually ruled hell before luci even fell from heaven??? i would love to know what happened that made the rulership pass over like that, although considering how absent luci is, satan might as well still be the ruler anyway because he acts like it. luci couldn't even attend the trial, and i highly doubt that's Just because of the whole shows not being able to cross over thing, luci in general even in his own show is very absent and doesn't do his job. satan is confirmed to have created imp kind himself, which confirms my theory that he created them in his image hehe. also he's HUGE. MASSIVE.

these two were serving cunt together and i'm happy to know that they're friends like people assumed they would be. they were trying to defend bliitz for his actions, which is really sweet since bee had only met bliitz once at a party before but she could tell he was a good person.

mammmon's "you're going to regret saying that" comment doesn't seem to have meant shit because it doesn't look like oz can get in trouble with the other sins for being with fiizz, apparently everyone there knows he and bee "like mingling with the lower class" and it's not like, illegal or anything. good for them. mammmon bee and oz were all flying insults at each other left and right lol

we got to see leviatthan and belphaggor! i was right about leviathan being a woman! or, women i guess? the two heads seem to have distinct personalities. we didn't hear them speak though.

bel is the one we got to see the least of unfortunately, not many clear shots of her. she didn't have any lines and was sleeping through most of the trial

for the gist of the episode, basically they were going to have bliitz executed at first and everyone was super afraid. but stollas intervened and his punishment wasn't death, because he's a royal and as satan put it "your life actually has value" so instead he will be stripped of his powers for 100 years. which honestly turned out way better than i thought it would. the worst thing right now is that his brother in law, anddrealphus, will be taking over his everything. and it leaves his daughter in the custody of his ex wife, who already seems to be in the process of manipulating her to be against her dad, which is kinda heartbreaking because his daughter is really all he has, the only thing he truly cares about, and she's gonna be turned against him.

anddrealphus is probably my least favorite character in the show right now he is.... weird. he keeps calling his sister hot and attractive and the first time it was like "okay he's just being supportive in a weird way" but he's called her hot like three or four times now, but it's also weird bc he's gay so i don't think it's supposed to be an incest thing (he just in general acts gay and then a pride month post confirmed it) so i don't know if it's supposed to be a "gay man is overly comfortable amongst women" joke or if the joke is supposed to be incest or what. definitely weird and i don't like it, want it to stop lol. he did grant me this great screenshot though

also look at these twos reactions when they saw death sentence read out on tv ;A;

the way it ended is kinda bittersweet bc hooray nobody died but also stollas lost everything and he's too numb to speak mostly. there was a wholesome scene where bliitz helped him take a bath which you know i love that kinda stuff lol

basically uhhhhh i feel like if this show is ever gonna make me actually invested in the main ship i suppose it would be now that mr princey is at a commoners level. i feel like that ship has sailed though like i feel like if i haven't rly cared about them this whole time nothing is gonna make me suddenly have brainrot for them lol. more thoughts upon subsequent rewatches probably

[flightofaqrow]

mothering (on mother’s day)

qrow + Sun Wukong ( @ultravioletvoleur​ )

fighting clearly hadn’t been what was on the kid’s mind. maybe he just wasn’t thinkin’ at all; he definitely isn’t right now as words tumble from his mouth, barely coherent. qrow still doesn’t need to hear these things about his niece, but he’ll let this one slide.

Sun leans his back against the wall, tail swaying to and fro. His face spoke to the internal conflict he was struggling with when it came to this, “I was hoping I could actually… Ask for your advice?”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"Quick update, may wanna say Happy Mother's Day to your niece. ...Kaybye!"

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

qrow whips open Harbinger faster than a nevermore diving upon its prey, and fires a warning shot off as Sun makes a break for it, near missing the base of his tail.

he knows the kid well enough by now, and trusts Yang even more, than to truly buy into the implications of his statement. oh, but if playing this cat and mouse game makes the cheeky monkey so happy, qrow will absolutely go a round.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“YIPE!”

That was a much faster reaction than he’d anticipated, barely making it ten feet before the crack of exploding gunpowder rang out. There was a hole smoking in the wall in front of him- dangerously close to banana height, and Sun began sweating. He turned very jerkily, with the closest approximation of a cocksure grin he could manage through his abject terror.

“Oh, uh. D-did you… Need something?”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

well, at least qrow got to make a point, should he ever actually need to act on teaching the kid a thing or two. alternatively, about picking fights one may not be able to win. a similar tough past he may have, thieves at least tended to work from codes of honor. not every struggle is the same.

he prods, sarcastic, feigned anger lining the sharp curve of narrowed eyes, sword still deployed at his side, “what in all of remnant makes you think you can just say things to me?”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

There is a very audible gulp as the Hunstman advances on him. Every other time they’d traded barbs, he’d gotten the sense that Qrow was something of an old glory days kind of person, who had lost their touch a bit. However, that split second action, and the pointed glare burning through his confidence like a hot knife through butter, told him a whole new story.

Qrow Branwen was what his nightmares were made of.

“Well you see I thought we were buddies and I thought you would know it was a joke I swear I haven’t laid a hand on your niece like that I would never well not never possibly in the future but definitely not right now not that I don’t think she’s attractive she’s very attractive oh but that’s not the only reason-”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

tch. forever a curse, even at his best. maybe he laid on the drama a bit too thick. honestly, he thought a bit of zeal is something Sun could appreciate. he’s far too much talk still, isn’t he? all bright light and translucent beaming rays which still questioned their own substance. he might be further ahead than he seemed at first, but still has a ways to go. …kids these days.

“of course I knew it was a joke, golden boy.” qrow folds away his weapon, drops his stance, while raising a brow. he lessens his posturing, but not his attention, hand still remaining on Harbinger’s hilt in the case of some trick.

“but I also took it as a taunt, tellin’ me you’re finally ready for a real man’s brawl. heh, guess i was wrong.”

fighting clearly hadn’t been what was on the kid’s mind. maybe he just wasn’t thinkin’ at all; he definitely isn’t right now as words tumble from his mouth, barely coherent. qrow still doesn’t need to hear these things about his niece, but he’ll let this one slide.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“What?!”

He’d almost lost his stones by way of his ass for a sassback?! Their Uncle was even more intimidating now, and he was going to die on that hill. Still, though, knowing that he wasn’t actually angry was a huge relief. The tension left his body and he slumped down with a sigh-

And then he noticed Qrow’s weapon was still out and ready.

“He-hey, uh. N-no need for that. I didn’t come here looking for a fight. I actually wanted to get you riled up so we could then use that energy into doing something for her. I- I know her situation with her mom isn’t great. I dunno the specifics, that’s for her to tell me when she’s ready, but…” He trailed off, trying to find the words.

“Well, I guess… I just want to make today lively for her, instead of having people walking on eggshells around her. Make her excited and happy that today happened, rather than add it to a growing pile of disappointing holidays.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“you moron,” finally, he fully releases, instead staring dumbfounded at the other. he really did think he could just come around and say whatever, and still get his way without consequences. what single-minded, reckless, stupid drivel. yeah, qrow had been an idiot brained teen at one point, but seriously never that bad. he didn’t have that kinda energy. different plans took different tactics, did they not teach anything at Haven or Shade anymore?

“i don’t need to be ‘riled up’ to do something for my family, kid. couldn’t you just ask like a normal person? i promise you, me bein’ jazzed up ain’t the kinda lively she needs.”

eyes now round with sadness; his chest deflates; pointed corners of his mouth turn down. it’s too close to the belligerence he used to have - unprovoked, but drunk. he’s trying so hard to be better than that. for a lotta reasons, but Yang too.

he breathes in, and out, fingers running in and out over his forehead. once satisfied in processing all these thoughts, in having switched gears, he turns to Sun once more, hopefully coming off with the same rational attitude he wants in return, “so, then, turn your brain and your sense of respect on, and just tell me what you had in mind, huh?

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Well… That’s kinda the thing. I was hoping I could actually… Ask for your advice?”

He leans his back against the wall, tail swaying to and fro. His face spoke to the internal conflict he was struggling with when it came to this. In truth, he’d wanted to go about this like a normal person, more than anything. Something in him, however, be it a defense mechanism or just a general need for attention he’d never really received drove him to do everything to an excess.

Truth be told, nobody hated Sun’s antics more than he, himself.

“I… I’m going to try to be serious here, for a minute. It’s- It’s not something that comes easy.” He sighed and pinched at the bridge of his nose. “I’m… scared. I’m really, truly scared, Qrow, of how she makes me feel. How much it would hurt to lose her, or even see her hurting. I just get so caught up in my own head that I can’t think straight, and… I’ve never…”

Another sigh. “I’ve never had a family before. So I don’t know what to do to help someone who’s mourning theirs. But I see her hurting, and I want to help, and when I came to you, I swear, I wanted to just ask, but. …That would mean… Admitting I love her.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

oh, here we go. this roller coaster again. what about his look or his life or any of his choices made him seem like someone to go to for advice? qrow barely scraped his own life together, and still dropped the pieces too many times. but somewhere along the line, somewhere in just trying to do good - for his team, for Oz, for his family, for Ruby, something must have slipped in to his very psyche, huh.

Ruby somehow always knows the right thing to do. Yang had told her.

I had good role models. Ruby had told him.

he’s cursed. and he wrestles with it every damn day. and while he’d never call it a good thing, maybe some people see themselves in that same fight. maybe he sees himself in theirs and their struggle to understand and express themselves, and that’s why even in the times he wants nothing to do with other people and their decisions, and he’s sure he’ll just mess everything up, he can’t help but listen. he can’t turn them away. doing so would do nothing to mend the wounds of a broken world. and in the end, continuing to try is the only way to stick it to Salem.

he takes a spot next to the young man against the wall, knee bending and sole kicking up as he leans, crosses his arms, turns his head to Sun and fixes his gaze on him.  

“yeah. loving people is scary. probably means you’re doin’ it right.”

qrow doesn’t know a damn thing about romance. not like that, anyway. he’s never been brave enough to face that very fear, to let someone that intimately close. almost, sometimes, maybe. somehow his chances always disappear before he’s quite there, only confirming those very fears. a great and terrible feedback loop, that. although, he can’t say such words are entirely unfamiliar; admittedly, the whole conversation is nostalgic. thrice over. he laughs, a bittersweet little huff, “…you sound just like her parents.”

that kinda love he knows, found, eventually. family. and if you ask him, they’re equally as scary to think of losing. “our family has never been the typical picket fence dream either, so don’t think you’re missin’ pieces of some non-existent normal. there’s no big secret about bein’ one, kid. you just gotta be there for each other.”

a palm-down hand raises to sweep across his body in a dismissive motion, “an’ not everything has to be some grand production to top the one before. trust me, i’ve screwed that up enough times to know.” qrow looks towards the ground, slides the toe of his shoe back and forth. “Yang, she… she’s used to people comin’ and goin’ in her life. if they come back at all. so, seriously… just go to her. be with her. she’s a tough egg, and too smart. she’ll tell you what she needs if you can just shut your giant trap enough to let her.”

[takaraphoenix]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 3

Finally finished my rewatch of season 3. Among the high school arc, this one was my least liked, though I did enjoy this overall villain!

1. Favorite character of this season?

Buffy, as boring as saying the main character's name is. Her journey from episode 1, where she is so struggling with everything she's been through, to trying to settle back into Sunnydale, then Faith disrupting her life, the whole Angel drama, Joyce now knowing the truth. It's a lot emotionally for Buffy to handle this season and her emotional journey – and the fact that the things that hurt her actually hurt her and have an after-effect – is what I enjoy most about this show.

2. Outstanding minor character (positive or negative)?

Anya! I absolutely love Anyanka. She is still rather awkwardly fit in here, post losing her powers, but I adore Anya

3. Favorite character dynamic?

Faith and Buffy. It is so complex. Best friends, two sides of the same coin, the good and the bad. Jealousy from Buffy's side shifting over to jealousy on Faith's side, with an explosive finale. Their is one of the, if not the, most complex dynamic in the entire show, at least in my opinion. Gotta admit, I am far more fond of it in the final season, but to see how it all started out and gradually shifted over the season is really fascinating.

4. Favorite canon romantic ship?

Not really a lot of positive romantic relationships going on. I love Oz/Willow, but hate that she cheated on him and that he essentially just took her back and it went back to normal without much actual... effect on the dynamic, they just went past the cheating. Xander/Cordy were just as ruined by the cheating and quite honestly, at this point in story, the Angel/Buffy has gotten too dramatic.

I would say Giles/Joyce. That is that one ship that got away, for me at least. I think they have great potential and the blushy avoidance after Band Candy was adorable, I always wished the show had fully gone there and given them a chance romantically.

5. Least favorite canon romantic ship?

Xander/Willow. What utterly forced OoC nonsense was that, really? Willow, of all the kind sweet people, to cheat on her partner? And really, Xander, after having been best buds all your life, NOW is is that you notice Willow is an attractive girl? Now that you are in a relationship with an amazing woman and she is in a relationship with an amazing guy?

Seriously, the fact that Willow's a lesbian is genuinely the only explanation I have for this. Trying to actively sabotage her relationship with Oz, because he is such a good and sweet guy.

I hate cheating with a passion, cheating plotlines are bullshit. And to put two characters I love into that? And have both of them have other relationships at the time?

6. Favorite episode?

Got a couple 4s in there (I am rating each episode between 1 and 5, with 5 being reserved to my absolute favorite episodes). Not so much one that really stands out, but many I am fond of.

03x06 Band Candy, which was a lot of fun with the role reversal of mother and daughter.

03x08 Lovers Walk was a lot of fun, I just love emotionally vulnerable Spike, I also love the awkwardness of the Spike-Willow dynamic (as this is not the last instance of us seeing this) and Spike giving Angel and Buffy the cold hard facts about their relationship. It's a fun episode!

03x09 The Wish is amazing, I always love a “What If” episode with an alternate reality and vampire!Willow makes me really truly gay, honestly. Alyson's acting in this episode is amazing.

03x11 Gingerbread is one that I like a lot because the whole... witch-hunt of it is fascinating and seeing Buffy opposing her mother as the 'main' enemy for the most episode is interesting to watch.

03x12 Helpless is an intense, emotional episode, it really tests the Giles-Buffy dynamic.

7. Least favorite episode?

Only got one I didn't like this season, that's 03x04 Beauty and the Beasts. The whole girl being abused by Jekyll and Hyde dude was... just not my cup of tea.

8. Favorite Monster Of The Week?

That Hänsel/Gretel monster from Gingerbread, I really found the whole idea really interesting. A demon that brings out the worth in people and makes them go after each other.

9. Least favorite Monster Of The Week?

Mh... Tucker Wells in 03x20 The Prom? He was just... bland. “I trained hell-hounds to attack the prom because a girl rejected me”. Gee. I mean, the whole point was to make the villain unimportant because this one really was about Buffy's emotions and the prom itself, but still.

10. Rate the overarching villain!

Mayor Wilkins was a fun villain! He was amusing to watch, he was quirky and weird. He was particularly outstanding due to his dynamic with Faith and the... fatherly fondness he developed for her. I do love when a villain is being humanized because simply fighting Pure Soulless Evil is rather boring, to be quite frank. Seeing the pure evil actually have human emotions makes them much more interesting to watch.

Bonus: Other thoughts?

My perspective on Faith has changed a lot over the years and that's fascinating.

I only used to look at her as the bad influence on Buffy (and she is), as a kid and teen who looked at them as much more mature than they are. Now, as an adult, I look at these children and I see Faith as the kid who's lacking a good influence on her.

I mean, seriously. Her OG watcher was killed, she came to Sunnydale on her own. The council never sent her her own new watcher though, Giles was kind of taking her under his wing. But really only “kind of”, because when she slacked off it was just shrugged off and commented as part of her bad character traits. No one would have let Buffy slack off, Giles would have made her train – and that was a big part of what shaped Buffy. The relentlessness of others.

And it's not even just the training. Faith is a kid, just like the Scoobies, but she isn't attending school. No one cares about her having a semblance of a normal life, even a bit. No one cares about her discipline. And she's living in a crappy, gross little motel.

Why is she not... living with Giles? Giles has a whole rather nicely sized house, surely there would be a room to spare for his second Slayer. But no one even seems to care that she is living in that crappy little motel.

What she needed was a watcher who cared about her as much as Giles cares about Buffy. Someone to guide her, to set her head straight, to show her she is cared for. Instead, she was treated as kind of the unwanted step-slayer, until push came to shove – and she found care with the villain.

[swiftwind3]

Let It Burn

A farmer... 

Oscar frowned. 

A wizard... 

He stared at the grip of the cane. 

A hermit... 

He scowled. 

A drunk... 

Whether it was the water seeping into his clothes or his anger that made him shake, he didn't know. 

An engineer... 

His eyes stung. 

A businessman... 

He closed them. 

A headmaster... 

With a single quiet sob, his throat was on fire. 

Were all these lives you lead...truly for nothing? 

Tears slid down his cheeks as he tensed and swung with a loud grunt, hurling the weapon. 

"Answer me!" 

You ass... 

He clawed at the wall in his mind, falling to his knees with a splash. Stinging water brushed and lapped at his wrists. He dug his gloved fingers into grainy sand, gritting his teeth at the tears hooking themselves on his lips. 

"Hey," a low voice called in front of him. "Do you know how much of a pain this was to find?" 

With a sniffle, he leaned back, not minding the water seeping into his pants and saying nothing as Qrow waded toward him, cane grip in his hand. "Listen, you’re in a moping mood. I get it, but can you get out of the water? You know, where you won't get hypothermia." 

Something flared in him and he spat it out. "You get out of the water. Leave me alone." 

The tall man shifted his weight. "Really?" 

The grip shined in Oscar's face, calling him like a pitiful magnet. Batting at it, Qrow moved back quickly, catching his hand and dragging him. 

"Hey," he groaned. "Letーgo!”

"Out we go, " Qrow sighed. 

"Stop it," his heels attempted to drive themselves into the man’s side. "Let me go already!" 

After being planted on dry sand, the hold on him tightened further. "You gonna throw it again?" Red eyes pierced him. 

With a choked noise, he hiccuped, tugging at his arm. "Let go..." 

"That's not an answer," Qrow snorted, shoving the grip back into his wet gloves. "Let's head back to Sapph's place. Everyone's looking for you." 

Wiping his face, the grip shook in Oscar’s hold. I don't need this, he taunted at the wall. It's trash. 

"I don't need this," he echoed bitterly. He turned and tensed again, only to be hooked by the waist. 

"You do need that." 

With a hiss, the cane extended and he roared, clawing and swinging. 

Qrow dodged those meager swings, clutching his arm tightly as he tried to throw the damn cane again. It plopped down on the sand. 

“You know, I went through a lot of trouble to get that thing, and I’d rather not go swimming for it. Now, come on. We're both wet and like I said, I'm not in the mood to get sick. I'm sick enough already from all those damn drinks...” 

The kid only batted and scratched, kicking his legs. "Stop stopーstop it," he sobbed. "Let me go!" 

Qrow's hold on him didn't loosen. "Kid..." 

Freezing, Oscar sagged in his arms, and he withdrew, letting him fall to his knees.

Swallowing his sigh, Qrow squatted to his level while the ocean continued to sing and hiss around them, carrying about its business. Wind pushed past them, paying mind to sway their locks and blow some salt into them. 

Oscar gave a shuddering breath. "Why can't you see I don't want this? Why can't you see I didn't ask for any of this? Whyーwhy are you trying to take me back, since you hate me so much?" Wet green eyes rose to meet red ones. "Besides, you knowーwe all know that I'm not cut out for this sort of thing. And there's no beating Salem," his lips quivered. "So, why? Why are you doing this? Why can't you just let me go? Wouldn't you be happier if you did?" 

Red studied green before dimming slightly in the moonlight. "An answer to that would be I can't let you die, useless or not. The honest answer'd be Ruby and Calavera'd both have my head if I let you drown or get killed by some Grimm just because you wanted to tuck tail and bolt. And I kind of like my head. Even if it is jack-hammering my sanity into the sand as we speak." 

He snorted. "Why do they care?" 

"That was my first answer. Those are their words of justice and chivalry, " Qrow seemed to mock. "Not mine." 

---- 

Ice cold stabbed and cracked into his skin, pulling him out of the dark with a cry. He coughed, light intruding painfully into his sight. "Whatーwhat theーhey. What is wrong with you?" 

"Many things," Maria Calavera grinned. "But I have to admit though, watching you proving me right has been quite a repulsive sight. I am quite impressed, too, though. You meet your idol and once she insults you, you don't even try to argue her." 

Qrow’s scowl relaxed, offering a glare. 

"Really? Nothing at all? I know drunks tend to be more wordy when accused of anything." 

With a sigh, he leaned back on the couch. “Why can’t you let me have my hangover in peace?" 

"Because while you were trying to drown your ridiculous guilt or stupid insecurities, your nieces and their friends have gone off to gods-know-where trying to find that poor farm boy you punched," she barked, her voice hammering at his head. "And I got stuck with babysitting duty. Literally and figuratively,” Adrian cooed at her feet.

Groaning, he flinched at the light. "Ozpin's gone?" He snorted. "Good riddance." 

She shook her head, blue specs narrowed. "Not just Ozpin; Oscar, as well. There are two souls in that boy's body, and it'd do us all some good if you learned that already." 

Rolling his neck, he sighed again. 

"By the gods, are you seriously not petty enough to at least try and prove me wrong?” Her tongue clicked. “Or was it that I hurt your feelings that bad?" 

A growl left his throat, confusing his annoyance and fury for each other. Then, he heard her sigh. 

"You know, you hurt those girls when we finally found you at that bar." 

Blurry memories sparked in his head. He didn’t recall the familiar chant of drunk people edging on a petty bar fight. "I don't remember attacking anybody.” 

"I'd be surprised you remembering anything at all," she snorted. "But you didn't attack them. You did say a name that seem to hurt them quite a bit, however." 

He blinked, eyeing the roof in drifting concentration. "A name?” 

"Summer. You called Ruby Summer. She seemed quite intent on chewing you out just before. And once you called her that, she opted to just leave you behind. Along with me. Not that I blame her. We'd both just slow them down." 

"...She smacked my drink out of my hand." He nodded. 

She mirrored him. "That, she did. It's a bit of a frustrating thing, I suppose, watching someone you love destroy themselves with no concern for those around them. I really am surprised how she managed to bottle up that rage right there and then. But, she's pretty much at her limit. And so is Yang. Seeing how close you and Ruby are, she'll probably let her handle the chewing-out, though." 

He let out a quiet snort, letting his lip twitch upward at the idea of those two scolding him for a change. 

"If you're so fond of them, why do this to them? To yourself? What guilt or inhibition could possibly plague a soul like yours?" 

Pursing his lips, he shook his head softly. "You ever heard of a Semblance you couldn't control, Calavera?" 

"I know they exist," she shrugged. "What of them?" 

"I have one of them," his brows knitted together. "And I suppose it's a bit frustrating to know you're contributing nothing but bad luck to the bad things already happening around you. And it's also a bit of a frustrating thing to know that you cause those bad things, too." 

She let out a laugh. "So, you're the poor bastard that got stuck with the catalyst of misfortune. My father told me to pray for you. And I suppose that is something to cry about." 

"I've cried enough," he muttered after a moment. 

"And now you drink," she retorted. "The next best thing." 

Their silence filled his ears. She situated herself on a chair with a grunt, sniffing. 

"Well, if you're going to do nothing but mope, do me a favor and get out. I don't need your negativity bringing Grimm to this house." 

"It takes more than one person in a city to attract Grimm," his cheek twitched. 

"You think I don't know that? And if you're not even planning on doing the right thing, don't go try and drown yourself again. I don't want to find you in a ditch." 

Sighing, he dragged his legs, standing with a hunch. "Gods...which way did they go?" 

"They've spread out all over the city. Maybe you could try and stop pitying yourself for once; give those wings of yours some exercise as well. Your life is enough of a nightmare." 

He let out another scoff, lumbering to the door. 

"Just how long will you let yourself be like this?" She called. 

Pausing at the foyer, he shook his head. "What does that even mean?" 

"Figure it out once you get out." 

As annoyed as he was, his body was too sluggish to even slam the door properly. 

---- 

"So, she booted me out. Or I let her anyway. I'd call her a crazy old hag but she had some pretty good points." Qrow shrugged. "I knew you weren't stupid enough to leave the city drenched in negativity, so I came this way. And wouldn't you know it, here you were." 

The boy snorted, scratching at salt and tears. "You say you have bad luck, but you seem to have pretty good luck finding people that don't wanna be found." 

"No, no. My Semblance brings nothing but misfortune. The only luck I have in finding anyone's finding them alive." 

Something poked the bottom of Oscar’s stomach, making him shudder. 

"Look. Oscar," he took a breath. "I don't hate you. And...as much as I want to, I don't hate Oz either. After everything he did for me, I figured after a while I couldn't exactly hate on the guy. And him owning up to this one mistake shouldn't have changed a damn thing. But it did. Just slightly, like all truths do when they come to light." 

Images flashed across Oscar’s eyes. A young man that looked like Qrow scowled. Things around him broke and shattered, weather fluctuated wildly, and crowds leaked sorrow and shouted in anger. 

"Still. Even after all he did for me, it didn't make it any less distressing to learn that all our hard work had been for nothing." 

"Your reactions...were justified," Oscar breathed, staring blankly ahead of him as a man shrouded in green appeared behind the young Qrow.

Qrow seemed to cry against the man. 

"But trying to take it all out on me and trying to take it out on Ozpin's two different things." 

"Yeah," he looked away. "You’re right. I’m sure you’d appreciate it if we understood the damn fact already, but we're...we're still getting our grip on things. And I understand that we can’t exactly take our sweet time doing that. Though, I'll be the first to apologize. It wasーignorantーof me to try and think you were one soul. I let my emotions get to me that day. So much so, that I forgot that you're two in one, I suppose. While I'm..." he sighed. "Still having trouble actively applying the fact, I am sorry for punching you. Beating up pipsqueaks like yourself aren't exactly my thing, so I probably should have thought more before I acted. Even though it’s too late for that now." 

“Thanks,” his lip twitched, but then, he frowned at the ground. "And if you can show me that, you can come out and talk, you coward," he spat. 

Qrow raised a brow. "What?" 

"Ozpin," he shook his head, closing his eyes with a sigh. "He'sーhe's showing me things. About your Semblance." 

With a tight chuckle, Qrow shrugged. "Don't get too personal with the kid, Oz. I'd appreciate it." 

Nodding with a hum, Oscar brought his knees in with a shiver. 

"Yeah, figured you start acting like a normal meat human. Let's head back." 

"Yeah," he echoed absentmindedly, attempting to dust himself off. 

"Everyone's going to chew your ears off so use the walk to brace yourself." 

Oscar snorted, his brows knitting together with his lips twitching. 

"What is it?" 

"Youーyou wore a skirt?" 

"Oh, sure. Show him that one." 

Oscar's giggles grew loud, and Qrow didn't have it in him to tell him to shut up. 

--- 

i wrote this really quick and posted it before canon could destroy it tomorrow lmaoo. inspired by @xhikarixyamix‘s lovely artwork which you can admire here. byyeee 

[frostops]

Thoughts on Ch. 6

Maria and Oscar are talking. It’s nice to see someone see him as more than a body for Oz.

Maria calling Qrow a child was on point. He is the only adult in fighting condition and he needs to step the fuck up.

Yang and Ruby shared a blanket. Fuckin adoarable.

Ruby is mad again. Qrow is understandably not handling things well, which I expected, but he is putting people in danger now.

Ruby hugging Qrow was sweet, but he is too gone to get through to. Finding out Oz didn’t trust him was the straw that broke the camel’s back, it seems. Even without the apathy, he would likely be doing nothing different.

“We signed up to save the world, not to put off the inevitable” Oscar is speaking the truth.

Ruby is right that they have to bring the relic to Atlas though. It’s too big a risk to leave it out in the open. They may have not chosen to be in this situation, but they are in it, and they have to deal with it.

Maria wasn’t getting off Qrow’s case. The bad luck comment dug deeper than she knew.

Qrow is more or less throwing temper tantrum, calling everything stupid and having everyone else fix things while he goes to drink. Maria’s child comment was spot fucking on.

Blake has spoken to Oscar almost as much as she has spoken to Ruby.

Qrow called Oscar by name for probably the first time. In fact, this is the first time for pretty much everyone but Ruby to have extended interaction with Oscar, as opposed to Oz being in control, or telling him what to say.

Even when they have no will to live, WBY are still willing to go with Ruby. That’s solidarity.

Maria is color blind. I wonder if that’s because her eyes are in disrepair or if that is the best the technology can do.

Silver eyes are powered by love. Grimm are attracted to hate. Hmmm.

Also, the first blast from Ruby’s eyes only pushed the Grimm away. A bigger one was needed to kill. This might be why the dragon was only frozen. Ruby didn’t have the strength to kill it, at least not yet.

Yang grabbed Blake’s hand before she left. HMMM.

But, really, it’s hard to say their “just friends” because, Yang chose to hold Blake’s hand, but not Ruby or Weiss. It’s almost like the nature of her feelings for Blake are different from how she feels for Ruby or Weiss.

Qrow’s eyes when he saw the apathy. He might have realized how his inaction and drinking are hurting the others. The only question is will that inspire him to clean up his act, or will it send further in his spiral of despair.

Yang said they have to at least secure the relic in Atlas. But, once they do that, she may rethink this mission. Oscar was right that they didn’t sign up for the mission they are on, as Oz led them to think it was a very different one. Once they deal with the immediate situation, they should be given the chance to truly choose whether or not to be involved, which they can only really do now that they know the truth.

Maria HAD silver eyes. How did she lose them?

[bluephoenixdruidicprincess]

Opinion about Buffy: The Vampire Slayer: Buffy is my favorite character on the show, her story is really good and I relate a lot with it, specially the early years, even though I'm a guy (but human experience can always be relatable, even if what happened to you is not exactly the same). Also, I love magic and magic wielding characters. I just wish that her sexuality arc was better planned, because she seems to have really felt love and attraction to Oz, so I think they should have made her bi.

I’m pretty sure you meant Willow on this ask and not Buffy, unless I’m forgetting something huge that happened between Oz and Buffy. But I’m sure there are people who did ship Buffy and Oz so maybe you did mean Buffy. But I’m thinking you most likely meant Willow as I know for a fact they were canonically involved.

I totally get you, by the way. Willow is a great character to relate to regardless of whatever you self-identify as. Society is on this really strange kick where, for whatever reason, you’re not allowed to relate to and like characters that aren’t exactly like you; you can only relate to characters that look like you or self-identify like you and this way of thinking has always felt a tad bit ridiculous to me. I understand and totally agree with the importance of more diverse representation but at the end of the day, I never needed a character to represent exactly like me in order to relate to them and like them. And it’s as you said, you can relate to characters even if your experiences are not always exactly the same. Particularly when I was growing up as a pre-teen and teenager, I had more of a propensity for enjoying male characters and that’s simply because at the time these stories were circulating, male characters were getting these storylines I related to more. But I never felt like I was a less of a woman for liking these male characters more than the female ones, they just had character arcs I was more interested in. So yeah, there’s nothing wrong with liking characters that don’t exactly represent you.

As I said, Willow was a great character and I completely understand you. She was super relatable and had this vulnerable quirkiness that was super adorable. She was one of my favorites as well. Interestingly enough, my favorite character was Oz and after Oz left, Anya took that slot. And Oz and Willow were such a cute pairing (they both had such different quirks that meshed really well with each other), I shipped them so much but I also really liked Willow with Tara as well. And I really liked what the show did with Willow’s magic arc. I thought it was super cool and how it eventually lead to this sort of addiction that Willow had to work through (with some really terrible consequences on Willow’s part) and that’s something that I always kind of appreciated with this show. Despite the show being heavily fantasy, the way it dealt with these “real world” problems in their fantasy setting was really fascinating.

It was an interesting move to play around with Willow’s sexuality and it definitely made a difference in a lot of people’s lives particularly when this show was still airing as it was something that wasn’t commonly explored, particularly in these “young adult” shows. I know quite a few people whose lives were saved because of Willow and her sexuality arc. But like you, I do wish it had been better planned. There were a few hints sprinkled a little bit throughout the earlier seasons but it honestly wasn’t really enough for me to be completely down with how quickly the change happened. It also doesn’t really help that it happened right after Oz was written out of the show. Her meeting Tara and having a relationship with Tara really felt like all the makings of a rebound relationship and I wish more of the season had been spent with Willow just kind of exploring herself more and I think that would’ve made her sexuality arc a little bit more impactful.

I also don’t particularly like how Oz was written out of the show. As I said before, he was my favorite character but I understand why he was written out. Around that time, Seth Green was getting more and more popular, he was becoming a more heavily sought after actor, he was also probably becoming more expensive and harder to nail in as a recurring character in the show, so it was probably in the best interests of the show to do what they did. I just feel like what the show did was kind of a crappy way to write him out that didn’t really do any justice to the character. But definitely it feels like that had Seth Green not left the show, Willow’s sexuality probably would never have been explored, I definitely don’t think Willow’s sexuality arc was something that was planned from the beginning but instead a result of having to write off the Oz character. And I do kind of wish, like you, there was more of a bisexual component in Willow’s sexuality. Because I do think that Willow did love Oz and that she was attracted to him. Oz represented so much to Willow. It was through him that she was essentially able to let go of her childhood and move away from Xander and really just become this new person. She might never have been able to attain that if it weren’t for Oz. I’m of course by no means saying that Oz was “the one” for her. Highschool sweethearts very rarely work out, I just wish the show would’ve acknowledged more not just the love she held for Tara but also Oz as well. Both of those relationships were instrumental in forming her as a person. But it is a common YA theme that you can only love one person in a truly romantic sense, I don’t necessarily agree with it, I think no matter how many relationships you had, how many of them you loved, you never truly stop loving any of them, they’re always there just kind of adding on to your current love.

[kokichi-and-co-imagine-blog]

If the V3 cast were to play Monster Prom, who would each character go for?

This is like, my third time trying to write this? I don’t know why it’s taken so many tries; it probably just has to do with getting cut off in the middle of the thought I was on. This may go a little more in depth then you thought it would, but that’s just because I want this to be as thorough as possible.

If you’re interested in Monster Prom, I recommend either buying it or just watching a playthrough of the game before reading this. There are going to be spoilers for certain routes along with secret endings that you can get, so… there. Now that I’ve been super transparent about what this entails, let’s get started.

V3 Dating Some Monsters!

Since this is a MULTIPLAYER DATING SIM, here are the groups of people I think would probably play against each other:GAME 1 -Angie, Himiko, Tenko, TsumugiGAME 2 -Kirumi, Kokichi, Kiibo, KaitoGAME 3 -Shuichi, Kaede, Rantaro, RyomaGAME 4 -Korekiyo, Maki, Miu, Gonta

We’ll talk about each game from top to bottom, ok?

Himiko would be player one after everyone insisted that she gets it (”Nyehhh, what a pain, I have to choose first?”). After picking Brian (Green) because he looked super tired, she waited for everyone else. Angie ended up being player two, and went as Vicky (Blue) because of how cute and happy she looked. Tenko chose Amira (Red) afterward because she seemed like she wouldn’t take crap from anybody along with the fact that she was the only girl left to choose from. Tsumugi was left with Oz (Yellow), but she didn’t mind it much; she thought his simplistic design was perfect for her personality.

Himiko didn’t really go for anyone in particular on her playthrough, although she got the most events with Polly. She did seem to like Valerie (The shopkeeper) but didn’t know that she was romanceable. At the end of the game, Himiko ended up going to prom by herself, and had a good time.

Angie went for Miranda because of how devoted she seemed to be to her kingdom! It was very impressive, and she didn’t bat an eye when she ended up getting the throne ending! Nothing like releasing a kraken to sneak a fish man into the school. (Tenko was a little concerned by Angie’s decisions through this route though, and kept an eye on her for awhile.)

Tsumugi was the only person in the group to try and romance a male, and even then, it was because she already heard of a certain secret ending with Liam- “Liam The Weeb.” She was super excited that they put a character in a game that you could see develop a love for something she has, and also had a good laugh when she muttered to herself about him requiring yaoi hands. After successfully getting it at the end, she already had been thinking of fanfiction ideas for a continuation of this route.

Tenko tried to get with Vera! Unfortunately, she wasn’t the best at reading the situations, and her stats weren’t high enough, not to mention everyone else kept getting a table with her at lunch! How was she supposed to be stepped on with affection by the powerful snake lady?!? When she was turned down at prom, she felt her heart break a little bit, but attacked Himiko with a hug saying that she would be fine as long as the little mage was there.

Before anyone could decide who would be player one, Kokichi took a chance to be Oz, but named him Ligma because Kiibo would inevitably ask the question of, “Why would you name yourself Ligma?” and he was absolutely ready to laugh at his response to the epidemic of ligma. Kirumi went next, choosing Amira because she “seems like a capable young lady.” Kiibo got Brian before Kaito could object to playing a girl, but the astronaut soon got his second wind by saying that girl power would trump the guys. He held his hand out to Kirumi for a high five, which she hesitantly accepted. 

“Ohhhh, I’ve heard how hard it is to get Vera! Don’t worry Kaito, there’s no way you cou-”

“I’M GONNA FUCK A SNAKE WOMAN AND NONE OF YOU CAN STOP ME.”

This is probably the most chaotic of the games due to Kokichi being able to egg on Kaito with no problem. Kokichi also decided to go for Vera, making it that much harder for Kaito. Kaito almost never got the lunch events with Vera, while Kokichi had his own agenda.

“You’re buying a used tampon? I know you’re messed up, but GOD, that’s a whole other level.”

Little did Kaito know that Kokichi had started the cult ritual secret ending, and was planning to finish it. After fumbling around with her and failing to live up to Vera’s expectations, Kaito got turned down at prom, and was pissed when Kokichi got the secret ending! Why hadn’t he been paying attention to what the midget of the group was doing?! He wasn’t sure, but Kokichi was having a good time cackling and “reassuring” Kaito that he was too dumb and not logical enough to have gotten her route anyways.

Kirumi liked how Liam carried himself, and was more than happy to try romancing him. She seemed to have relaxed while playing this game despite the constant bickering of the grapes in the room. With no failed events, Kirumi went to prom with Liam, and appreciated how secretly funny he was under his hipster demeanor.

Kiibo was being crushed constantly by Kokichi and Kaito after making the grave mistake of sitting between them. He did his best not to let that get to him, but he was distracted for the majority of the game because of him. Before he could choose the last question of the personality quiz at the beginning, his hand was knocked and he accidentally got started on Damien’s route. He spent the majority of the time asking Kirumi questions about if it was normal to be that angry and destructive. He was especially concerned about how Damien had dead bodies in his home! However, he successfully took the demon to prom.

(After his failure, Kaito spent hours playing the game and trying to get all the endings possible. He ended up getting stuck on romancing Valerie.)

From the very beginning of this game, Shuichi and Kaede promised each other that they wouldn’t get in each other’s way, and would help each other should special events requiring the extra boosts in affection come up. Rantaro was happy to do his own thing along with Ryoma. This was probably the calmest group of people to play the game.

Rantaro chose Oz before others could, just changing the name to his own so that no one would get confused. Shuichi chose Amira, but Kaede asked if she could change the name for him without him looking. When he eventually turned back, he was named “Sweetchi

Rantaro decided he liked how excitable Polly was, and how every event with her was like an adventure. He liked being a part of her party scientist shenanigans, and watching her tell a sugar daddy to marry a llama. Which he did. He got the secret Party Science ending with her, and was super calm. Originally though, before dating Polly, he really hoped that Aaravi The Slayer was romanceable.

Kaede accidentally started the Blobert route, which made everyone’s day (”you can date… a blob with a hat?” “You’re just jealous of his hat, aren’t you?”). Getting to give everyone ridiculously specific greeting cards, including a corpse. Regardless, she was super happy to hear how much everyone loves Blobert, and decided that he would always be her favorite. (Shuichi was taking some mental notes through this playhthrough.)

Shuichi ended up going to prom with Miranda as a ghost. It was an accident that he even got on her route, and he still wanted to at least have a successful run. He went to the shop and saw the ghost costume, he was too interested to not buy it. Going through all the cutscenes, he thought Liam getting frustrated was a little cute (Though he wouldn’t dare admit that to anyone) and was happy when he managed to go to prom as a spooky little guy!

Ryoma saw the gentleness in Scott’s heart, and was taken by it. he wanted Scott to be the happiest boy in the world and stay unaware of the hardships that come with life. He ended up successfully going to prom with the werewolf, and was surprised at how fun it was to play a game with other people at the same time. He could probably get used to this.

“I don’t care what fuckin’ player I am, titless- just lease me the fire girl because she’s SMOKIN’ like yours truly!”

“... I think I’m already regretting playing this game with you.”

After Miu made a big deal out of it, she ended up with Amira. Maki chose Vicky, changing the name to her own. Korekiyo chose Brian, but named him Shiso Asobi. once again, no one knew what was with the ridiculous name. Gonta was left with Oz, but he had no problem with that! He did, however, have problems with changing his name. His hands were a bit too big for the keyboard.

“REVERSE ROMANIAN WILKINSON? I don’t know what she’s on, but I fuckin’ LOVE her!”Miu was all over Polly and how ridiculous she could be, including her Reverse Romanian Wilkinson ending. She wasn’t sure what the penguin mask was for along with the guacamole and bag of beads, but just imagining what it was getting her hot all over. She successfully pulled it off, and then proceeded to bother Kiibo about trying it with her.

Maki was attracted to the way Scott acted like a certain astronaut she knew, so she just couldn’t ignore him. getting the correct choices on his route was super easy for her, and she smiled just enough to get Miu on her case for a little bit. At the end of the game, she wondered if she’s been wanting a man who’s essentially like a puppy.

Gonta didn’t want to romance anyone! He just wanted to have the best time he could making people happy. Unfortunately for him, his actions brought him to the orgy ending. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he was asking everyone around him why they weren’t wearing clothes. Miu was yelling angrily because she hadn’t been informed that such a route even existed, and Maki just sighed out of frustration. Korekiyo wasn’t surprised given the rest of the games content, but he found humor in Gonta being the one to get such an ending.

Korekiyo wasn’t originally going after anyone. He just wanted to experience what it was like to play a game about dating people with, well... other people. However, when he basically summoned a powerful monster from the totem of zgord, he changed his playing style to fit accordingly. With a high enough charm stat and being able to take a tentacle monster to the prom, everyone was slightly disturbed, besides Miu. She just wished that she could be a part of that action.

[funkymeihem-fiction]

The A-Mei-Zing Outback Adventure (Chapter 23-FINAL CHAPTER)

(This is the final chapter of my first Meihem story! And I thank you all so much for reading and following along. This may be the conclusion to their Outback adventures...but it’s not the end of the MEIHEM!

If you want, head on over to my new sequel to this story:

Hot Headed, Cold Hearted

http://archiveofourown.org/works/11796141

Thank you again!)

Their recovery had not been easy. Her insides had turned red and black and rebelled against her own body, the remainder of her hair had fallen from her scalp, her first attempts to eat real food had resulted in immediate and violent expulsion, and there had been nights of pain where there was no relief until she begged Angela to put her under, better to lose herself in sleep yet again than suffer any more. Junkrat and Roadhog never made any such requests, and endured the treatments with the same angry muttering and resigned stoicism with which they had faced other equally unpleasant things. Dr. Ziegler oversaw their medical recuperation with a keen eye, guiding them through their healing with the help of Ana and Lucio (Zenyatta’s offers of meditation and renewal arts had been swiftly and viciously denied) while Mei filled out pile after pile of paperwork explaining every minute detail of what had happened during their disastrous expedition into the wastes of Australia; often with Junkrat chiming in to not to forget to include some of the more ‘juicy bits’…though Mei wisely decided to leave most of his more scandalous suggestions out.

Winston and Bastion came with yet more paperwork (although this was a great deal more fun to fill out) about possible scientific excursions in the future, and her gorilla friend seemed both sincere and eager to possibly get out of the lab for a while himself, although he hoped it would go a little more smoothly than the mission to the Outback. Bastion had marked several dot locations on the world map, but merely tilted its head when asked what they were and simply pointed to them again, while Junkrat whispered suspicion and threats in the background at its strange behavior. And after that, they had a steady stream of visitors simply coming to see them; from Ana and Roadhog’s knitting club, Lucio and D.Va stopping by to play video games with Junkrat, and when Zarya had returned from a mission abroad, she had nearly crushed Mei in one of her all-encompassing bear hugs and had visited every day after that; with books, stories, and a Russian stew that she swore would make Mei feel better in no time.

Even Torbjorn had dropped by, though it was merely to drop off the newly repaired Snowball. He had painstakingly worked his way through and around Junkrat’s makeshift ‘repairs’, though even he seemed baffled by how it was functioning at all. The little drone’s AI had been transferred into a sparkling new blue hull, and its pixel eyes no longer sputtered or went randomly dead, and it no longer sounded like a flatulent oldworld modem when it beeped hello to her. Mei had been overjoyed to see it back to its old self, and it hovered over to nudge and hug into her arms…before promptly turning around and starting to flash more Mandarin curse words across its screen, aimed at Junkrat. She had been giggling too hard to really scold it as the two started fighting across the room again, and decided to leave her companions as their imperfect selves.

And they had been interviewed numerous times as they lay in their beds. Even Roadhog had been pressed for as much information as possible, though the old junker rarely offered more than his usual grunt or a shake of the head. When the dreaded questions came about Junkrat’s and Mei’s ‘relationship’, as they professionally called it, to Mei’s relief it amounted to little more than a few awkward inquiries as to their mutual consent. Winston never mentioned any more accusations of Stockholm Syndrome, and instead spent most of that interview cringing and trying to avoid any more of Junkrat’s winking and bragging about his self-proclaimed ‘irresistible animal attraction, sheer virility and amazing sexual prowess, an absolute vision in the nuddy, and hey are you writing all this down?’ while she hid her face in both hands and wished that the radiation had killed her to spare her the embarrassment.

But that had been months ago. Things were starting to get back to normal.

Her hair was starting to grow back in now, and Symmetra had kindly trimmed it into a feminine bob for her so she no longer looked like a shaggy mess. The color had returned to her face, her lungs no longer hurt when she breathed, and she had regained some of the weight she’d lost during her months of ice and fire in the desert. She was beginning to look and feel like herself again, and now she could smile when she brought up the eco-monitor program, watching the red blobs of the radioactive storms roll across the wastes. And though Overwatch couldn’t publicly take credit for her work and she had to remain a mysterious benefactor, Winston had let her know that the early warning systems she’d programmed were now a mainstay in the lives of the Outback’s inhabitants and was already saving lives.

She had helped. Despite everything, she had helped. She still couldn’t say if it had all been worth it. There was still something small and poisonous and black lurking somewhere in her, something even Mercy’s medicine couldn’t fix, something that made her angry and hurt every time she started really thinking of things…What a cost she’d paid…

But it was over, and she had helped.

***

The sweet breeze of the ocean air of Gibraltar felt cool against her face and ruffled the ends of her hair against her cheeks, bringing some small relief from the hot sun. She sat on one of the far rooftops by one of the communications tower, listening to the crash of the waves and the shrieking gulls as she scribbled in one of her personal notebooks.

“Tried to read your diary there one time, ya know. Your lil’ journal thing?” Junkrat was laying stretched out on a towel a small distance away, his mechanical limbs discarded nearby and a comically large set of sunglasses on his nose as he lay basking in the sun. Like Mei, he had recovered and was looking his old self again. His own hair had grown out at a record pace, even over most of his bald spots, and his eyebrows were as mysteriously bushy and healthy as ever, as if they had grown back overnight.

“Oh?” She looked up from her writing, glancing over.

“Real smart of you to encrypt it all in Chinese, love, real smart.”

She smirked and went back to scribbling. “Do you want me to write some in English for the next time you decide to spy on me?”

“Sounds great. Be a doll?” That familiar toothy grin spread across his face, tucking the stump of his arm under his head. “Mostly I just wanted to see if you ever wrote about me. You know, silent yearning from afar, who’s that mysterious man, maybe a kinda sexy intrigue? That sorta thing.”

“Well, I can assure you that that was really not what I was writing about you back then…It was probably best you couldn’t read it,” she admitted.

“Owch, darl.”

“Sorry! I mean, it wasn’t anything terrible, just…not the nicest, either,” said quickly. “But I’ve written more about you since then!”

He leaned up slightly, adjusting his sunglasses with suddenly renewed interest. “Is it real good?”

She smiled demurely, looking away. “It might be good. It’s a shame you can’t read any Chinese...”

“Owch again! That’s ice cold! C’mere, you.” He waved his good arm as she scooted a little closer, pulling her in. “I know that look. Somethin’ bothering you? Is it the pills? Is it your hair? I like it short, looks real nice on you.”

She shook her head, laying down beside him with a little nudge to make room. “Nothing. It’s just hot out.”

“Pft, this ain’t hot. Still, you wanna go in?”

Another shake of her head, closing her eyes against the sun. “It just reminds me of being back in that little house again, back in the desert. For a while there I kept thinking I would wake up and be back in that shack. It’s just like when I would wake up and think I was back in…back when it was cold instead of hot. Jamison, are you…Are you glad we came back?”

“Of course I am! They saved ya!”

“But…are you glad? That we’re back here? I’m sorry, I don’t even know why I’m asking…”

His gaze turned a little wary behind the lenses of his goofy glasses, his bushy brows furrowing slightly. He was silent for a long moment, shifting restlessly atop the towel, before replying with a low “Well, that’s a bonzer of a question, ain’t it? Arright look, I know you ain’t actually asking me, you’re asking you. But! For what it’s worth, my answer is…’I don’t know’. You got no idea how much this place pisses me off, most of the time. But, it ain’t all bad. Got my own place, food whenever I want it, getting paid by a monkey to blow things up, and they got the doctorin’ facilities that saved my most favorite lady in the world…and then I got fucking bullied into the doctoring stuff too, might I add.”

“Oh, that wasn’t bullying!” She protested half-heartedly. “And I’m glad I did. I’m glad you’re better.”

“See! Then there’s something to be glad about! Yours truly! And I don’t mind saying that’s a lot to be glad of, you snagging the most handsomest and humblest bloke this side of Oz. Look, you don’t gotta figure out the answers all the time. And you don’t gotta be happy, neither. Sometimes things are shit, but it’s better than being attacked by bees, ya know? Dunno if I’m glad to be back. Just glad you’re here, wherever. And if you go trying to find whatever you’re trying to find, I’ll go with ya.”

There he was again, cutting through to the heart of the matter she could only ever dance around, blunt as always. He could blast a path of destruction wherever he went, and this was no different. No matter how many walls she put up, he was one of the only ones who could tear them down just as quickly. Sometimes it irked her, and sometimes it was exactly what she needed most, even if she couldn’t come out and say it. It hadn’t been the desert that had broken through her ice. Not really. It had been him. She’d been cold before, for so long, and it still felt like his body heat was burning even warmer than the sun above them. She could feel it against her cheek as she pulled in closer to his side, running her fingers up his side and feeling the sharp angles of his jutting ribs. “You’re awfully philosophical, you know. And maybe romantic. In an extremely odd way. I never would have guessed it before.”

His grin returned, leaning to press his nose to hers smugly. “Heh! S’truth!”

She had felt trapped here before, would probably feel trapped here again if she stayed too long…but it was nice, in its own way. It was a place at least worth returning to. How could she be too sad when the sun was shining, the birds were calling, and the sea was lapping gently so close by, and with her strangely charming companion smiling at her like that? Maybe it wasn’t ever going to be her idea of home, but maybe she’d been too hard on it.

Maybe she’d been too hard on a lot of things.

She was distracted by a pair of lips on her jaw and neck, starting to creep downward, and she squirmed as he started to roll on top of her, pressing both hands to his bare chest to keep him at bay. “Jamie?”

“Too much thinkin’! Live in the now! Give your brain a rest, lovey. Lemme help get your mind off your troubles, eh? We got a good thing going here, and I’m gonna enjoy every second of it. And I plan to make you enjoy it too, multiple times, kinda like last night…How bout I wind you up until you’re ready to explode? Lemme show you one of my newest and most favorite specialties…”

“Lewd!” she gasped, even as she leaned her head back to give his lips more access to her throat.

His hand was just starting to slide down her side when both their communicators went off at the same time. Her shoulders slumped a little in disappointment and Junkrat cursed loudly, but moved off her so she could roll upright, struggling to get her hair in order. She still wasn’t used to it being so short, but at least he said he’d liked it this way? Clearing her throat, she activated her comm, seeing the icons of other agents lighting up one after the other. “Zhou Mei-Ling and Jamison Fawkes present.”

Winston’s gruff voice piped up on the other end. “We’ve just had call go out that Talon has made another advance into Oasis. I want following agents; Pharah, McCree, Genji, Mercy, Mei, Junkrat and Roadhog, Symmetra, and Zenyatta to mobilize immediately. You have an hour before the Orca is fueled and stocked, get ready to move. Over.”

Mei groaned audibly as she clicked her affirmative response. “Another desert? I was hoping for something a little more…snowy? I’m going to get another awful sunburn on top of my other sunburns, I just know it.”

Junkrat snorted, strapping his prosthetic into place on the stump of his thigh. “Well, don’t be too hasty about the snow thing, lovey. But ugh, sending us into the middle of posh bot central? S’the only place worse than Numbani. Makes me sick.”

She thought for a moment, then pressed herself to his back and wrapped both arms around his narrow shoulders as he started to pull on his arm. “I guess it beats sitting around here wasting away in bed, or getting attacked by bees?”

He pulled off his sunglasses, his scowl soon replaced by his usual toothy smile as he rested his head against hers. “Now you’re getting the hang of things! Guess I might even be more careful this time, can’t stand the thought of another minute in that fuckin’ hospital ward again. “

“Good,” she leaned to press a kiss to his cheek before pulling herself upright. “I want you to take care of yourself out there. Although it’ll be nice to get back in the field again. I’ve had lots of time to make adjustments to my endothermic blaster, now my icicles are sharper than ever. Time to show those Talon agents what we’re really made of!”

“Oh yeah, those blokes are in for it. You chill ‘em, I’ll kill ‘em, heh, get it? Oh, I’m liking this side of you…After we’re done with all that, might have to get you in one of them fancy-arse Oasis hotel rooms and wind you up, just like I said before.” His lanky body also heaved upward to stand, his height looming over her as he spotted a familiar, similarly giant figure slowly making its way across the field towards them. “Oi, there’s Roadie! Guess I’d better go start double-checking the frags and getting everything ready to move out…” He hesitated, seeing her pause again and look out over the ocean, although he couldn’t see what was in her eyes this time. But when he took her hand, she readily looked back to him. “If you need me out there, I’ll be right beside ya.”

She nodded slowly, and her smile returned. “I know.”

“And if you get pinned down in the field, just give me or Roadie a shout and we’ll be right there. From now on, I’m the only one allowed to pin you down!”

“Ugh, really?” She elbowed him lightly in the arm, and he elbowed her right back. “…You ready?”

Pulling her forward, he let her take the lead into their next mission. “Let’s go!”

[iwillalwaysfindyoutillow]

My take on "geeky" Willow vs "insecure" Tara.

Willow's attraction to Oz I think is definitely the musician thing and the fact that he pursued her. People seem to forget that Willow was ultra insecure. In my opinion, moreso than Tara was when we first meet her. Willow's first line to Buffy: "Why? I-I mean 'hi.' Did you want me to move? Willow is completely not used to genuine friendly attention from anyone who is not Xander or Jesse. (I also get the feeling that Jesse was mostly friends with Xander over Willow.) Tara sought out Willow in "Hush" because she thought they could do a spell together. She gently confronts Willow about hiding her from her friends in "Who Are You?" I mean...sure she backtracks and tries to play it cool, but Season 1 Willow, she wouldn't have even had the guts to do that. I feel like people for get that Willow, everybody, in any show, they are made up all of their previous seasons. Willow didn't just stop being insecure, she hid it. You can see her fears of being thought a nerd in the scene with Percy at the frat party. Where she hears him call her a nerd. It shakes her up so much that she mentions it to the Scoobies later in her recounting of finding the dead body. She was so shaken by Percy's perspective on her (and on how deeply she fears it to be true) that she still mentions it even after she is traumatized by seeing the bloody dead body right next to her on a bed. She also mentions it a couple of times to Tara in passing "geek infested roots." She is not over the pain of being passed over for so long and she does not like her deepest self, that nerdy, cool, adorable girl we all love, Willow doesn't see that girl. She sees herself as she dreams in "Restless". A super nerd, wearing weird clothes and a laughing stock of everybody (including her girlfriend and her best friends). In Willow's mind, nobody truly believes in her.

[iv-kplpt]

bodyguard au

plot summary: charlie’s a daughter of new york’s mayor. she moves to gotham; and needs a bodyguard. cue oswald cobblepot. or: don’t write during a ~12h long depression/anxiety attack. ~7,8k words rated m for some vague nsfw because of course, charlie and oz have a very sexual relationship

When Crispin - her father - became the mayor for the second time, she decided it's high time to leave the family nest. She didn't have any problems with her family - she loved them and they loved her; but she was young and wanted to see more of the world. To try truly living all by herself.

"I want to move out of New York.", she told her parents one evening, during a family dinner; and Crispin was first to respond, sighing sadly.

"Did I really ruin this city like my opponents predicted me to?" he asked sadly and she laughed, shaking her head. The city thrived during his terms of office; he was a good man, who cared for his people and was determined to make America's second most obnoxious city a place where everyone decent would feel at home.

"Of course not, dad, you're great at your job!" she assured him, and her mother nodded vigorously. "I just think it's time for me to become more independent, you know?"

"Do you have any particular place in mind, angel?" Eleanor - her mother - asked and Charlie nodded.

"Gotham City." she said and Crispin's face dropped.

Gotham had... Peculiar reputation. A masked vigilante was keeping the streets clean; it was the home of two of America's most well-known prisons; and its mayor was Hamilton Hill, one of her father's most staunch opponents.

"Why Gotham?" Crispin asked tearfully. "Of all the possibilities... Why Gotham?"

"Well, maybe I just want to fix your local PR image." she said with a wink. "I dunno, it just... Feels right."

"You are an adult, so there is nothing we can do to stop you..." Eleanor said with a sigh. "But maybe... Rethink this."

"I've done this many times already... And I see no cons. C'mon, I'm a big girl."

"Yes, but for us you'll forever be a kid." Crispin stated tenderly and she groaned quietly. "But alright, this is your life and I respect your decision. We'll get you a bodyguard."

"I have a bodyguard."

"A full-time one." Crispin said firmly. "And one that knows Gotham. I... Insist."

"Yeah." she said, thinking about how Gotham is filled with people like the Joker and Killer Croc. "That's... Probably a good idea."

"I have Bruce Wayne's private number. I will call him in the morning, see if he can recommend someone..."

"Bruce is still single." her mother said in a casual tone and Charlie turned her head to stare her down. "What? He's a wonderful young man! Very, very charming, very handsome..."

"I know, I've met him." she said anxiously. "But I'm not moving for him. I'm moving for myself."

"I'm just saying..." her mother said with a wink. "I'm sure he'll take you under his wings."

"I'll give him your regards." Crispin added and Charlie groaned even louder.

Bruce Wayne did have a recommendation for them - he personally vouched for his childhood friend, who recently returned to Gotham from Europe and had been making a name for himself as a bodyguard.

"I've arranged a meeting." Crispin informed her, as she was browsing houses for sale. "He will meet us here next week."

"I haven't even bought a house yet."

"He knows Gotham like the back of his hand. Maybe he'll recommend something."

"That's a lot of to expect from a bodyguard, you know."

"I want my daughter's bodyguard to be reliable in every aspect." Crispin said firmly and she laughed. "...I'm being too much, don't I?"

"Maybe a bit." she admitted, closing her laptop and putting it away. "Don't worry so much, it'll be fine. I'm just a daughter of the mayor, not the president."

"...yet."

"...well, at least remember to tell the press it was my idea." she giggled. "Drag me down with you. You already did that once, with that punching bag, remember?"

(She once gave him a punching bag, with printed out photos of his least favorite right-wing politicians as a birthday gift; and he told everyone about it.)

"Do you still get those death wishes?"

"Yeah, but I don't care. Those are just words. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me."

"Ah, I taught you well." he said tenderly, placing a kiss on her forehead. "Attagirl."

The meeting with a man recommended by Bruce Wayne took place one week later; they met him in their living room.

(He travelled all the way to New York just for this meeting. He seemed to be determined to make a good first impression.)

He showed up about half an hour early; her parents were supposed to be home soon and she was still in her bathrobe, putting dressing up off, when the intercom buzzed.

"Miss Charlie?" she heard the voice of Thomas, one of three receptionists that were working in the building where her family lived. "There is a man to see you-"

"Right." she said with a sigh. "Let him in, we've been expecting him. I'll let my parents know."

"Naturally."

She hastily headed to her bedroom and put some clothes on; she was just brushing her hair, when the doorbell rang.

She opened the door still holding her hairbrush; the first thing she saw was a yellow tie.

"You're early." she said, looking up, her eyes meeting her potential bodyguard's. "Mister..."

She paused for a moment; both because she realized her father never gave her his name, and because the young man was distractingly handsome.

"Cobblepot." he said eventually in a polite tone. "Oswald Cobblepot."

"You're early." she repeated, still staring at him, squeezing the handle of her hairbrush.

"I realize and I'm terribly sorry." he said apologetically, though she could see amusement in his eyes. "But in case of potential contracts like this I try to show up early to spend some time alone with the client first. I was sure I informed your father of this."

"Well, he never told me." she muttered, stepping aside. "In any case, please, come in. I'm... Charlie."

"So I've been told." he said, visibly amused, taking his coat off; she closed the door behind him and finally put the hairbrush down.

"Do you want tea? Or coffee? Or... Anything?" she asked, feeling ridiculously nervous.

(She always felt this way around people she found attractive. Good thing New York political scene was filled with bland people; never gave her an opportunity to embarass herself or her family.)

"Tea. Earl Grey, if it's an option."

"My mother loves it. We... Have a reserve." she muttered, turning around and heading to kitchen; he followed.

"I don't bite, you know." he said suddenly and she almost dropped the cup she was holding. "Am I making you anxious?"

"What if I say yes?"

"Then I won't take the job, because my clients are supposed to feel at ease with me around." he said very seriously and she turned around, absentmindedly noting how tall he is.

"It's nothing personal, mister Cobblepot. I... Always feel nervous around people I don't know." she lied through her teeth and he raised his brows. "...really."

"With all due respect... You're a terrible liar." he said sadly, shaking his head. "What can I do to make you feel comfortable?"

(not being so damn attentive and handsome would be a good fucking start.)

"Give me time." she said instead, forcing herself to look him in the eye. "Come on. Let's sit down. And talk. Like normal people do."

They did just that - and with time, she felt more at ease with him around; in fact she felt so at ease she never noticed half an hour had passed. And then an hour. And another one - and her parents still weren't home.

(Oswald was a good listener, and a very eloquent speaker; one habit of his she instantly fell in love with was using his hands to convey emotions. He had beautiful hands, scarred here and there; his fingers were long and slim and looking at his hands she simply thought yes.)

He told her a bit about himself; he had a very colorful past, and seemed to be a man of many talents. Good at hand to hand combat, decent with firearms, good cook, silver tongue, well-versed in literature and art.

"So, a Swiss army knife of a person." she said with a sigh. "That's... Impressive."

"And useful." he added. "So, miss... We've been talking for about two hours now. How do you feel about me?"

(are you single? please say yes.)

"Good." she said instead, reaching for her phone. "But what about your personal life?"

"I'm married to my job." he replied, and she couldn't tell whether he's serious or joking. "Meaning... No distractions. You would be my top priority, always."

(Her brain was quick to take it out of the professional context.)

"Alright, assuming my parents ever do get home... I'd say you're hired." she muttered, texting her dad. "I still have yet to buy a home though."

"Crest Hill." he replied instantly. "It's a suburb, a very safe, prestigious one. Clean air, lots of green, Wayne Manor nearby... Nothing bad ever happens there, and it's still close enough to the city proper."

"You really do know Gotham." she said impressed and he smiled. "Alright, I'm sold. I think I saw an offer on the internet..."

"And I know exactly whose offer it is." he said hastily and she tilted her head. "I can guarantee everything's in tip-top shape."

"You sound almost desperate to get me to move to Gotham." she said jokingly; and before he replied, her parents got home.

"We've been stuck in a traffic." they announced cheerfully and Charlie sighed, not believing a single word they were saying.

Oswald walked up to them to greet them; and even though they were talking quietly, she could hear him almost charming the pants off them both.

"So, I take everything's settled?" Crispin asked, walking into the room. "Charlie?"

"Uhm, I thought you want to talk to him first-"

"Well, you spent some time with him and you're fine, aren't you?" father interrupted her. "So?"

"You were the skeptical one, dad!"

"But I'm not anymore!" Crispin announced, sitting in his favorite chair. "Well, I'm trying to be more optimistic. Do you want me to look further or-"

"No, no." she interrupted him. "This one's alright. I... Think I like this guy."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." she said firmly. "Also, he was recommended by Wayne... A man who truly has his shit together. Finding me a bodyguard is off the list."

"Well, glad to hear it." Crispin said, visibly relieved. "Mister Cobblepot!"

"Yes?" Oswald asked politely, entering the room, Eleanor - who was giggling like a highschooler - right behind him.

"You are hired, young man." Crispin said, and Oswald's eyes lit up. "Follow me... Let's talk business."

Oswald and Crispin disappeared in the latter's home office, and Eleanor looked her daughter in the eye.

"I trust him." she announced, and Charlie tilted her head. "Do you trust my expertise?"

"You're my mother. Of course I trust you."

"He's charming, capable, and very devoted to his job. You'll be safe with him, and I will be able to sleep peacefully, knowing someone like young Oswald is watching after my child." Eleanor stated calmly and Charlie blinked a few times, her eyes suddenly very wet. "Oh, angel..."

"It's nothing." Charlie muttered, fighting off the urge to cry. "I love you."

"And I love you."

*** The process of moving went remarkably smooth - but not without some interest from the press. Everybody wanted to know why is mayor's young daughter - who's been described as charming and dazzling and simply delightful by everyone she ever crossed paths with - suddenly abandoning New York for the sake of Gotham, city pulsating with danger that loved night as fiercely as sharks love blood.

She bought her house from the last living member of the Crowe family, who decided it's high time to cut ties with Gotham; she redecorated and furnished it, minding the room that was going to become Oswald's lair; and before she knew it, the day had come and she was saying goodbye to her parents and making an excited post on her instagram.

(She had a lot of followers. Some friends - but generally, a lot of strangers, very interested in her personal life and everything that came with being the only child of a relatively well-known politician.)

During that time - between signing the contract and moving in - she've seen Oswald few more times; she made few short trips to Gotham, and he served as her tour guide each time. She really started to feel at ease around him; his presence was calming. She felt safe around him.

(There was still a matter of her finding him irresistibly hot - but she was sure she'll find a way out of this mess.)

And so a new chapter of her life began, just her, her home and her bodyguard, who seemed to be remarkably interested in her well-being.

"I can take care of myself, you know." she complained during her first proper evening in Gotham, as he was closely watching her in the kitchen. "You're supposed to make sure I don't die, you don't have to babysit me."

"Uh-uh." he said, as she almost cut herself with a knife. "Are you alright?"

(His concern seemed to be disturbingly genuine.)

"I'm a big girl, Oswald. I can take a little cut."

"Naturally." he agreed politely; his phone rang in his pocket and he kept looking at her with his calm, piercing eyes that always made her feel almost naked. "May I..?"

"You don't need my permission to pick up a phone, you know." she said with a nervous smile.

He only nodded.

"Bruce!" he said enthusiastically, still not taking his eyes off her. "Yes, yes I am. Oh, it's the mayor's daughter. No, not this mayor's, I wouldn't work for him." he said with disgust and she giggled, knowing he's talking about Hamilton Hill, the mayor of Gotham. "Yes, that one. Thank you again for that commendation, by the way- oh? Yes, of course."

For a moment he put the phone down.

"Bruce Wayne cordially invites you over for tea." he said politely. "Tomorrow."

"Alright, I have a grand total of zero plans anyway." she said with a shrug. "Give him my regards."

"Well, you heard the lady." Oswald said, after resuming the paused conversation. "Yeah, we will be there. Mmmm-hm. Give Alfred my regards. Tatty bye!"

He looked and sounded so relaxed, talking to Wayne; as opposed to how attentive and vigilant and serious he was around her.

(he said we.)

It felt odd, having someone who was not a close friend or a relative in her kitchen, watching her every move; and she was sure falling asleep knowing he's in the house will be even weirder.

(Though she wondered what is he like in the morning. Groggy? Peppy? And does he sleep on his stomach, or side, or back? Does he snore? So many questions.)

She was sure of one thing though - she liked watching him. He was easy on the eyes, with his rugged charm that worked ridiculously well with his custom made, elegant clothes. She'd pay to see him in something casual though.

"Do you only ever wear suits?" she blurted out suddenly and he raised his brows politely.

"Pardon?"

"I was wondering if you have any casual clothes, that's it." she shrugged, trying to play it off.

"I have clothes for every occasion." he replied politely and suddenly she decided she really wants to know what his pajamas look like.

Her first night in Gotham was a bit weird; mostly because she decided to give in to her hedonistic urges. Her bodyguard was hot, and it's been a long while since her last time with anybody; but he was also on the same floor and she could hear his quiet footsteps outside. And she was never a quiet type.

With her one hand tightly pressed against her mouth and her other hand between her legs she let go, closing her eyes and drowning in vivid imagination.

She woke up at an ungodly hour; and Oswald woke her up. He didn't do it on purpose; but his general presence so close to her bedroom was unnerving enough to make her wake up, wrap herself in a blanket and walk out, still half asleep.

The door to his bedroom was open and she absentmindedly peeked in; blinked a few times and felt a sudden wave of heat wash over her body.

There was something mesmerizing in the sight of him doing push ups shirtless, as she could see his arms and back and flashes of torso, marked with scars here and there. He had a beautiful body; and she couldn't take her eyes off him.

He realized she's there after a couple of minutes.

"Did I wake you up?" he asked apologetically, getting up and wiping sweat off his face with a nearby towel; she had to fight off an urge to touch him.

"Yes. No." she corrected herself instantly, yawning quietly. "I need to get used to it, I suppose. To you."

"Is everything... Alright?"

"Yeah." she muttered, looking away and feeling the redness on her face; she blushed easily. Damned redhead genes. "I'll... Go back to bed."

"Yeah." he replied, looking at her with a mix of concern and amusement. "You do that. Do you want me to wake you up?"

"Do this if I won't get up till noon." she replied, already hurrying down the corridor, feeling as if her heart is about to jump out of her chest.

It took her about an hour to fall asleep again; and when Oswald woke her up by gently knocking at her door she woke up desperately craving a cold shower.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked politely, as she shuffled past him, yawning and brushing her hair away from her face; she was wearing an old, very oversized tee from her father's first campaign. It reached her knees and she absentmindedly wondered if he can tell she's not wearing any underwear.

"Mmmmhmmm." she muttered in response, slowly walking down the stairs, desperate to get some food. "Christ. I hate mornings."

"It's noon." he pointed out, as she opened the fridge and stared at its contents. "Do you need... Help?"

"Yeah." she said, giving up and sitting down on the nearest chair. "I'm useless for an hour after waking up. Do you even get paid for this?"

"I am, actually." he said, walking past and briefly brushing her shoulder with his fingertips. "Your father told me everything about your habits... Everything he knew about, that is."

"Did he tell you I talk in my sleep?"

"He did." Oswald confirmed, standing with his back turned to her. "Don't worry, I've had chatty clients before. I can tell the difference between someone talking in their sleep and calling for help."

"I wasn't doubting it."

"I've also been informed of your dietary habits." he added and she groaned. "I know a lot about you."

"Oh yeah?" she asked, watching him, remembering the sight of the muscles on his back. "Did he show you my baby pictures?"

"No, but I'm sure they'd be heartcrushingly adorable." he said with a surprising smirk, setting a plate in front of her, and it took her a long moment to remember how to breathe. "Will that suffice?"

"Who needs a cook, when you're on hand." she muttered, glancing at the most perfect french toasts he made and he snickered in response and her heart skipped a beat at this sound and the way he slightly squinted his eyes and briefly bared his teeth.

(His teeth looked sharp, especially the canines.)

They met Bruce Wayne this afternoon; he took them in the patio of his enormous mansion. Oswald greeted him like an old friend he was; warmly, honestly, enthusiastically.

It was all gone, replaced with stoic professionalism when he turned around to introduce Charlie; but Bruce Wayne only waved his hand and shook his head.

"We've met already." he told Oswald. "During... Crispin's first campaign, isn't it?"

"Correct." she confirmed, smiling nervously. "But I was a different person back then."

"Yes, I can tell." he muttered, briefly glancing at her hand, where an engagement ring used to be back when they first met.

"What brings you to Gotham, Charlie?" he asked, after they sat down and his butler - Alfred, Charlie remembered - was pouring them jasmine tea.

"I want to have a life of my own." she said shortly, stirring her tea and inhaling the aroma. "Also I'm sure dad could use some positive PR here."

"Ah, being unable to escape from the family business... How painfully relatable." Bruce said with a smirk and Oswald snorted quietly. "Well, do let me know if you'll ever need something. Your father has my full support and I'd do everything to see Hamilton Hill squirm with you around."

"I can't believe he still runs this town." Oswald muttered, turning a biscotti between his fingers. "When will someone replace this guy?"

"Who knows." Wayne said with a mysterious smile. "Maybe sooner than later."

"He's been the mayor since... Forever." Oswald said, turning his head to face Charlie. "He was the mayor when we were kids. And it was... What, twenty years ago? Huh, Bruce?"

"Yeah, about that."

"My father was this close to replacing him." Oswald muttered suddenly, absentmindedly crushing the biscuit with his fingers. "This. Close."

"I know, Oz." Wayne said quietly, and heavy silence fell; Charlie nervously sipped her tea, wondering what exactly are they talking about.

They spent rest of the afternoon on pleasant conversation about nothing and everything; Bruce's butler chimed in a few times, and he seemed to enjoy bickering with Oswald. They both had sharp wits, and were not afraid to use them; and Bruce and Charlie stared in silence.

(Oswald's tongue was sharp like a razor and his smile was theatrically, infuriatingly condescending. She glanced at him dreamily, her chin resting against the back of her hand, her elbow on the table; she wanted to wipe this smile off his face, preferably by kissing him.)

"He's always been a show-off." Bruce muttered to her eventually, and she giggled, still staring at Oswald. "I'm glad to see this hasn't changed."

"That's the first time I see him so... At ease." she said quietly, glancing at Wayne. "He's very prim and proper around me."

"He's a professional. But give him some time. Once he realizes he can afford it... He's going to loosen up."

"You know, I can hear you two just fine." Oswald said suddenly. "I know you're gossiping about me."

"Of course we are." Bruce said nonchalantly, as Charlie's cheeks turned red. "You are an incredible gossip material, you know."

"Oh, I do. I have the looks, charisma and an aura of mystery... I'm the perfect gossip material." he said with a self-satisfied grin and Charlie suddenly realized he's very probably very aware of the effect he has on her.

But - as the time flew and she was slowly settling down - neither of them brought this subject up. There simply was no good way to do it; so they kept on living. Oswald was slowly loosening up around her, and she was begrudginly fostering her growing crush on him, only really letting go during the night, letting her imagination run wild, project all of her wants onto him, or: the imaginary version of him.

It wasn't just the two of them all the time; she was slowly building her new social life. She gave an interview, and quickly found common grounds with two journalists that were the question asking part; and Oswald personally vouched for both of them, assuring her they are both ethical and earnest.

(He knew both of them from his previous contracts; and he was quick to assure her he's not going to sell them any information, any secrets, any "spicy stories about what kinds of underwear can be found in the laundry bin" and her face turned red after she started to frantically try and figure out whether he somehow came across her more scandalous lingerie... And if he liked it if yes.)

Being a daughter of Crispin Schiller-Aberdeen, Charlie was seen as exotic curiosity of sorts - so she received quite a lot of invitations. She was very selective; but she did make an appearance at few fancy balls and fundraisers and dinner parties, her bodyguard always few steps behind, watching like a hawk, waiting for someone to slip, to make a wrong gesture. Most people ignored him; they were used to the presence of bodyguards. Some tried to chat him up, mostly old friends; but only mayor Hill manage to get an actual reaction out of him.

It took Charlie about a month to meet her father's loudest critic. She only had this doubtful pleasure once, years earlier, and back then she was in company of her family and fiance; this time it was just her and Oswald behind her, his eyes scanning the crowd, looking for potential danger.

"I'm going to talk to the mayor." she informed him suddenly and he groaned. "Oh, come on. He's not going to kill me... At least not in front of the people."

"Believe it or not, but I don't like him." he muttered, as they were walking in Hill's direction. "Slimey bastard."

"Oh, Oswald. Be nice." she whispered, blindly reaching behind and very gently brushing the back of his hand with her fingertips; that was actually the first time she touched her and it sent a pleasant shiver down her spine. "It's my show, after all."

He hadn't replied; but she could feel his presence behind her, as she approached Hamilton Hill, smiling brightly, glass of champagne in hand.

"Good evening, mayor Hill!" she greeted him cheerfully and he actually winced. "Long time no see!"

"Miss Schiller-Aberdeen, what a... Magnificent surprise." he muttered as she was staring him down. "How's your... Father?"

"Thriving." she replied nonchalantly, taking a sip. "He sends his regards."

Hill sighed and reached out to put his hand on his shoulder - a normal gesture, that happened many times, with many people.

"Don't." Oswald suddenly said firmly, stepping between her and the mayor. "Do not."

"Oh. Cobblepot." the mayor winced again, trying to get past him. "You and your conspiracy theories again?"

"She's under my protection, mayor." he said quietly, not taking his eyes off Hill's face. "And this is the closest I can allow you to be."

"This is insane!" the mayor claimed, rolling his eyes theatrically. "What is the meaning of this?!"

"Oh, you know." she said, nervously glancing at tense Oswald. "Contract details. Some bad blood."

Before any of them said anything else, Oswald - without a word - turned around and walked away. After a short moment of ignoring Hill's blabbering she hurried after him.

"Oswald!" she called out nervously as they reached an empty corridor.

He suddenly stopped and she bumped into him. He turned around and put his hands on her arms and looked her in the eye.

"Stay away from Hill." he said firmy and her heart was beating so fast and hard she was sure she's about to have a heart attack.

(His face was few inches from hers and she fought off the urge to lean in and kiss him. He looked angry and tense and pained and so, so beautiful.)

"Alright." she said softly and he sighed. "I will, I swear."

"I... Apologize." he muttered eventually, letting her go, taking few steps back and running his fingers through his hair. "That was highly unprofessional."

"I don't mind, you know." she said hesitantly. "Just... Be honest with me from now on. I prefer it. I'm not made of glass."

"No." he said carefully, looking at her in a weird, almost tender way. "Whatever you're made from... It most certainly is not glass."

Their almost-moment had been ruined by an unfamiliar voice, coming from behind them."

"Oswald?" the voice said. "I'll be damned!"

"Hello, Louise." he said, instantly turning his attention to the newcomer. "It's been a while."

The woman's name was Louise, Louise McDonagh. Oswald used to work for her, few years back, when she was just starting her law career and was working on a case against one of Gotham's many gangsters; and they seemed to be good friends.

She seemed nice and sharp, but she did ruin a moment.

"Oswald..." Charlie said eventually, and he instantly turned his attention back to her. "I'm tired. Let's go home."

"Naturally. Louise..."

"I'll call you." she said, waving her hand. "I still have your number. Go, take care of her. ...and maybe keep her away from Hill for the time being."

"That's my plan, yes." he said with a faint smile. "See you 'round, Lou."

"See ya."

"Someone important?" Charlie asked as they were on their way to her car.

"Assistant district attorney. She works under Dent."

"That's... Not what I meant."

"...oooh." he said after a short pause. "Well, she's a... Friend, I suppose. But I'm married to my job."

She nodded silently; he opened the door for her and she sank into the backseat, sighing quietly.

Only after starting the car he cleared his throat.

"Lou's not my type anyway." he added quietly and she looked at the back on his head.

"Who is your type though?"

He looked at her in the rear mirror.

"You don't have to know." he said finally and she felt disappointed; she was expecting another answer.

(She was hoping for him to say you.)

*** Her crush on him didn't go away during the following month, in fact - it only got worse. She often found herself enamored with small, irrelevant things - the way he'd tilt his head very slightly when listening to her, the way he'd wistfully raise his brows, or the way he'd help her get out of the car. Small things.

And the fact he finally really loosened up around her didn't help; he'd sometimes engage her in a battle of wits or sting her pride with a snarky comment or make fun of how short she is without her heels. It all felt good - like being around a good friend - but was also creating a fake image of closeness.

She also discovered he looks very hot when he's being an asshole. There was something in his eyes, some mischievous spark; something in the way his lips curled slightly. Something in the way he tilted his head and squinted slightly.

(One morning he firmly refused to make her scrambled eggs until she said pretty please. That was disturbingly hot as well; not the fact he was refusing to make her breakfast, but the fact he made her practically beg. She spent rest of the day rethinking her life.)

Eventually the tension that had been building up reached its peak; but instead of crashing and burning, things went in an interesting direction.

It happened about three months after she moved to Gotham, and their contract began; three months of accidental touches, cold showers, loosening up slowly and furtive, infatuated glances no one else was supposed to notice.

Three months of getting off with one hand covering her mouth; that one night she decided she's a big girl after all, surely she can control herself and just be quiet.

Turns out - she could not. Or maybe she was quiet and it was a matter of timing; a matter of him wanting to ask her something and knocking at her door and thinking she simply didn't hear him, because it wasn't a late hour.

She opened her eyes at some point; and froze, one hand between her legs, the other one cupping her breast, as Oswald was standing in the doorway, staring.

He wasn't disgusted. Or appaled. Or shocked. He simply... Looked at her and her body and probably could hear the sounds stuck in the air between them.

"Do you need a hand?" he asked and she blinked.

"W-what?" she asked feverishly. "What?"

"I heard my name, you know." he said, crossing his arms on his chest and leaning against the doorframe, still staring at her. "On your tongue and on your fingers..."

"What if I told you to get out?" she asked, her heart pounding. Oswald snickered.

"I would get out." he stated lazily. "But is this what's going to happen?"

She hesitated only for a moment.

"No." she almost whispered. "Do you think I'm pretty?" she asked without thinking and her bodyguard raised his eyebrows.

"How about I show you instead?" he asked quietly and she nodded and rest of the night was a blur, an avalanche of sensations.

(He turned out to be an asshole in bed as well; but she didn't mind, she didn't mind at all.)

"Now that was unprofessional." she muttered quietly, lying on her side with her back to him and he only chuckled in response. "Good Lord."

"Mmmm?" he asked, brushing her shoulder with his scruffy chin; she turned around to face him, their faces  inches away from each other.

"I won't tell anyone." she said hesitantly, trying to ignore the fact just how much she enjoys the simple sensation of lying right next to him, naked, vulnerable, safe. "Okay? I'll keep it... To myself."

"I... Appreciate it." he said carefully and for a moment she thought there is something in his eyes, something disappointed, something- "But next time... Just tell me. I'm always happy to help."

(The weird spark was gone, replaced with the usual glimmer.)

"Next time I'm locking my door." she muttered and he scoffed; but then he laughed and kissed her one last time and got up.

"How's your back?" she asked as he was picking his clothes up. "I uh... Kind of went overboard with the scratching."

"I like to bleed out a bit from time to time." he said nonchalantly. "I'd be more worried about your bedsheets."

"I have a washing machine."

"And I know how to get blood out of the fabric. We'll manage."

And they never talked about it again - until it happened again, two weeks later. And again.

Suddenly they became very physical with each other. Oh, they were perfectly proper in public - nobody would ever guess anything. Not Louise, not the journalists, not Bruce Wayne, not her parents. He was polite and a bit stiff and official; but in private he'd sometimes turn to her with that weird spark in his eye and say "Hey, doll." Or she'd ask him to help her out with something, biting her lip and tilting her head. Or he'd steal a kiss from her or she'd casually inform him she's not wearing any underwear (and hadn't been for the past ten hours, her casual coffee date with Vicki Vale included).

They did that a lot - and they never really... Talked about it. Because there was no "they" to speak of - they were a sudden string of one night stands, some very thin strings attached.

(Even if she simply enjoyed his company. And personality. And being in his arms. And listening to his voice. And hearing his heartbeat and making him laugh and existing next to him.)

It felt like with every occurence, her emotions for Oswald were becoming more and more complicated - but she promised him she'll keep it a secret, and so she had nobody to complain to, nobody to consult.

*** It was all very enjoyable, up until the moment she realized she - accidentally - fell in love. She left her crush unattended for a few days, and it accidentally turned into something bigger.

(He was snarky and attentive and beautiful and was making her feel alive.)

Then it became... Slightly less enjoyable. She knew sex and love are not inherently connected, and that sometimes it's good to enjoy the physicality with no emotional attachement - but she couldn't help but mix those two up. Around Oswald, she was vulnerable; willingly, because she knew he wouldn't take an advantage of it.

(He was making her feel safe and cared for and beautiful.)

And it was all confusing; her heart and body wanted the same, but only one of them could get it. Beggars can't be choosers, she decided; if sex was all she could get - fine.

(She could pretend. She was a decent actress; and if she closed her eyes and listened to their breaths and moans, she could almost believe they are in love. She could lie to herself, for a moment; and it was a very well-crafted lie, based on gentle kisses and caresses.)

At that point, Oswald already knew about her short lived engagement; Hamilton fucking Hill told him one evening. Or: he asked her what happened to her ring, to her wonderful partner, to their plans?

She told him to mind his own business and Oswald politely warned him to not try anything. He seemed to be unbothered; why would he be bothered? Everyone had a past, and it's not like she was cheating on anyone with him.

(He did look at her slightly differently though; but she couldn't describe the difference. Something in his eyes had changed; and the first night after he found out she was very determined to make this thing go away. To make him look at her same way he did before finding out.)

So - she had fallen in love, and only had sex as a substitute, only sex and brief moments after, when she could close her eyes and pretend. With his hand in her hair and his arms around her and their breaths dancing together and their heartbeats mixed - she could pretend.

It went on like this for a few months; few hours of fun, no emotional strings attached, back to normal, back to friendly bickering.

And then he took a bullet for her.

It's not like she forgot who she is during those months - the world never let her forget. People demanded her opinion on various issues, wished her death, were claiming she's their role model. Sometimes strangers would approach her on the street and Oswald would then intervene, always vigilant, always concerned.

(He sent quite a few creeps to the hospital, while getting only few bruises himself; she'd later kiss those bruises, same way he was kissing her freckles.)

But one day, someone actually tried to kill her; it was another fundraiser and she was enjoying herself and chatting with Louise and Vicki and he was nearby, looking more anxious and quiet than usual; and then before she knew it he pushed her out of the way and there was a hole in his chest and he was bleeding.

"Oswald!" she called out, dropping her glass of wine, as he heavily fell to the ground, his eyes wide open, his face deadly pale.

Someone called an ambulance. Someone called the cops; and she called her mother, her fingers trembling, her voice shaking.

"Mom..." she said breathily and somehow Eleanor instantly knew. She was at work when Charlie called, in her private clinic; and there was no time to waste.

"You go with him, I'll be there in an hour." she said, as Charlie was trying to muffle her sobs.

(Nobody questioned why is she so shaken over her bodyguard taking a bullet. Or: maybe everyone questioned it, but nobody knew how to ask?)

Her mother and her deft hands arrived on time, and Oswald was handed to her, and he was in good hands; all she could do was wait, wait and cry a bit, her clothes stained with Oswald's blood.

The police questioned her there; detective Harvey Bullock was asking the questions she could not answer. She didn't know anything, she didn't see anything - all she knew was that she's scared and sad.

Her father and Louise showed up eventually, equally shocked; Crispin was also angry.

"It's not his fault!" Charlie said instantly, after realizing her father's actually furious. "He saved my life!"

"I'm not angry at him, poor sod was just doing his job!" Crispin stated, walking in circles. "I'm angry at a son of a bitch who pulled the trigger. Are you sure you're fine?"

"I just need to take a shower, that's all." she muttered, hiding her face in her hands.

Louise carefully put her hand on her shoulder.

"He'll be fine." she said."He's strong and it was just a one bullet. It's nothing."

(In that moment, she was very close to telling them the truth. About being in love.)

Eventually, Eleanor left the operating room; she raised her hand before anyone said anything.

"He'll be fine." she said. "He'll recover. The bullet missed anything vital, so mostly it was just painful. And bloody, but it's nothing a transfusion can't fix. And no, you can't talk to him. He's... Out. Try tomorrow."

"Mom..." Charlie said faintly and Eleanor sighed.

"I know, angel. Come on. We'll get you something for your nerves."

After they were left alone - Eleanor managed to find someone willing to let them borrow their office for a time being - they sat down and looked at each other in silence.

"He's important to you." her mother said finally and Charlie looked away. "Isn't he?"

"He's a good friend." she muttered, thinking about all those times he held her in his arms. "Okay?"

"Is he good to you?"

"...he's getting paid for being good to me."

"This is not going to be another heartbreak, is it?" Eleanor asked quietly and Charlie sniffed quietly.

"It's not like this." she said finally, lying to herself and to her mother at the same time. "There is nothing between us, except for the... Job-related stuff. And I... Wasn't expecting to see someone get shot right in front of me."

"Charlie..."

"What?!" she snapped and looked up, to see her mother's gentle smile.

"He is a very attractive young man." Eleanor stated and Charlie gasped. "Is he single?"

"Mom!"

"Oh, I'm just joking! ...i think."

"MOM."

"Darling, I love your dad too much to hurt him like this. ...plus Oswald could be my son. Not quite my forte."

"Jesus Christ, mom."

*** Oswald left the hospital two weeks later - and she spent those fourteen days in Gotham. She refused to come back to New York, even for such a short period; she wanted to be next to him. She felt like she owes him that much.

They let her visit him for the first time two days after the operation; she showed up with his favorite pillow, an anxious smile and her temporary protector behind her back.

"I am glad you're alive." she said quietly, sitting on a chair next to his bed; and he sighed.

"Yeah, I guess I'm glad too. Are you alright?"

"Not even a scratch."

"Did they catch... Whoever pulled the trigger?"

"Not yet, no. Though I've heard Batman's interested as well, so I suppose... It's just a matter of time." she said with a shrug and Oswald winced. "They'll catch him, Oswald."

"I don't feel right, just... Sitting here." he admitted suddenly. "Are you in good hands?"

"Yeah, the temporary guy is alright... But he's not you." she finished hesitantly. "I miss you."

"Oh, already?" he asked with a smirk. "My God, Charlie, it's been less than a week."

"Yeah, well, my home's just not the same without you." she admitted, nervously playing with the sleeve of her blouse. "Does it make sense?"

"It does." he said, looking at her weirdly tenderly; or maybe his eyes were simply hazy due to painkillers. "Kiss me, Charlie."

"He'll see..." she muttered, glancing in the direction of her current bodyguard, who was standing on the corridor, and she could see him through the glass; he was looking in the opposite direction.

"No, he won't." Oswald insisted. "Come on. Just... Just a quick peck. For a fallen hero."

She gave him a quick peck. And another one. And few more.

"Damn." he muttered, his eyes closed. "I need to start getting shot more often, it might actually be worth it."

"Don't joke about it."

"Ugh. Fine." he said theatrically, and she smiled against her will.

She visited him a few more times, and he always managed to get a kiss from her; but eventually, he came back home.

At first she was simply enjoying his presence back in her life, really. The fact he was there when she looked; but eventually... Something snapped.

Being freshly out of the hospital didn't stop him from anything; and as they were lying in bed and as she was tracing the scar on his chest with her fingertips and as he was marking her neck with kisses, she turned her head and muttered "I love you".

She didn't mean to; really. She meant to say something completely different, like "I'm glad you're back" or "I missed you" or "I want you". Completely, absolutely, not at all meaning the same exact thing as "I love you".

"What?" he muttered back, raising his head and looking at her paralyzed face. "What did you just say?"

"...nothing?" she asked in response, feeling like the Grim Reaper was knocking at her door and closing her eyes. "Don't stop."

"Charlie..." he said softly, gently brushing her face with his fingertips; and this tender touch coming from someone who was dangerously close to death because of her almost made her tear up. "Look at me."

"No." she refused weakly. "And you don't look at me."

"But I love looking at you." he whispered back and her heart stopped. "And I love you."

"...what?"

Oswald Cobblepot snickered quietly and told her the truth; about how he first heard about her few years back, when her father was first running for mayor and she and Eleanor were helping him and she was engaged.

Oswald claimed for him it was love at first sight - he read every article that as much as mentioned her and followed her social media accounts; but never interacted. He was fine with having just an obscure, impossible celebrity crush; but then few years later, a miracle happened. Bruce Wayne called him, asking him if he'd be interested in this gig, as a bodyguard for her - and he didn't hesitate, because it would be a dream come true.

(And then he had absolutely no idea how to act around her, because he never planned that far ahead; and then an even bigger miracle happened and he accidentally heard her that one night, moaning out his name.)

"So." he said eventually, probably still staring at her; her eyes were still closed. "We good?"

"Kiss me." she demanded instead of responding. "Now."

"Mmmm... But where?" he muttered, and instead of replying or opening her eyes she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, kissing him deeply, just the way she did many times before; but something was different this time 'round. Not better or worse  - just different.

But it was alright. She liked this different; same way she liked the sudden difference in a way he touched her.

Her heart and body wanted the same and finally, they both got it.

[countingstarsrp-blog1]

member groups

LEVELS & FAME

fame is a tricky thing. depending on how you find it, it can either be the best thing or the worst thing. at counting stars morality does not play into the scheme of the fame thing. as we try to apply it to the real life structure, a person can be famous for just about anything. the garbage man could have coincidentally wound up in the background of the right shot. or the broadway hopeful from piedmont south dakota could finally receive their star turning role. the point is, here at #csrp it's not so much the occupation that drives the fame, it's about the opportunities that one must take to take it to that next level. our member groups are levels within themselves and just because your character start out at one doesn't mean that your character has to stay stuck at the same group forever! remember to play up to that accordingly!

UNKNOWN 

well we all gotta start from somewhere right? regular joes and janes who have no claim to fame at all and absolutely no interest towards it will be known as the unknowns. depending on how you look at it, they might be the luckiest or unluckiest of the bunch. they get to live their lives without worry of their dirty deeds being broadcast all over god's creation. they can do what they want and go where they please and no one gives a damn about what they look like while they're doing it. they have everything to gain but nothing to lose. typically, people who balk at the idea of fame and celebrity and all the glorious perks that come with it will be happy to be unknown.

real life examples: me. you.

FADED CELEBRITY

fame isn't always cut out for every one. it's a hard lesson that some learn the hard way, by getting a little fame and losing their minds completely with it. for anyone who has ever been famous at some point but now not so much is a natural fit for this particular group. ideally, the formally famous who resides here have never made it above idol level because they couldn't maintain that longevity or the strength to keep striking that fame iron while it was hot. to be here isn't particularly a bad thing. it's all about perception. take jonathan taylor thomas for example, this 90s mega teen idol seemed poised for a career of lasting adoration and success. as far as teen idols back then go, it got no bigger than jtt. with a prime time tv show to be featured in, not to mention a slew of featured films with his name above the title card to his name, it didn't seem that there would be a period of time that jtt would ever fall off. but he somehow did. he's probably made a crap ton of money to last him several lifetimes so he's probably off somewhere enjoying it in utter peace.

real life examples: vanilla ice, mc hammer, william hung, kevin federline

15 MINUTES (OF FAME)

andy warhol said it best when he famously theorized that everyone will receive their fifteen minutes of fame. in this social media savvy culture, it's incredibly easy for a regular any one to come up with the right hash tag or receive an unprecedented amount of likes despite their faces and names not being world wide known. these are the real attention seekers who aspire to be real movers and shakers later own down the road. for now, they will happily set the timer off for their fifteen minutes. individuals featured on commercials or guest spots in tv shows or films, or even producing and performing their own short videos to broadcast on instagram or you tube will be considered best for this member group. they are not quite known but might be instantly recognizable should the right person be browsing imbd.com. in the world of acting in all medias, these people will be the bit players. in music, these will be the one hit wonders. in sports related media, these might be athletes who had one decent season and then couldn't quite match the hype -- but still comfortably coast on the boost of their public profiles. being in this particular group does not mean that your character's celebrity profile has peaked, with the right projects ( achieving steady work is key ), and a continual raise in celebrity profile, it's incredibly easy to ascend to higher and higher levels of fame. just look at the kardashians.

real life examples: grumpy cat, chris crocker, rebecca black, internet celebrities, sweet brown

CELEBUTANTE 

when you combine the words "celebrity" & "debutante" you get the word celebutante. is historically a person ( usually a young girl ) from an upper class family who has reached the age of maturity. now as she ( or he ) is eligible to be married, the debutante is introduced formally into society in front of eligible bachelors from likewise financial backgrounds to marry possibly marry. debutantes are known amongst their social circles and almost always have a featured spot in the new york post in some way or another. they like to throw parties to show off their wealth and it's always a guaranteed fun time to be there front and center when they do. the phrase 'famous for being famous' should be rejected immediately, however, if any particular group fits it would be the celebutantes. a celebutante doesn't have to be a woman because men are just as capable of being a celebutante too. just look at brody jenner.

real life examples: olivia palmero, paris hilton, nicole richie, ues socialites

RISING STARS 

maybe to be fixed -- what is the one thing that separates an individual worthy to be placed in the rising star group and an individual who is beginning their fifteen minutes of fame? a little bit of longevity. risers, otherwise known as community fanbase, are celebrities who have made the most of their fifteen minutes so far and have racked up a building community of other people who enjoy what they do. though internet celebrities will more typically be considered in the minutes group, there are a select few who have produced forth a considerable amount of effort to remain relevant. youtube vloggers who have broken records, the delightful people behind how to tutorials, gaming people and etc will be a great fit for this group. ideally, risers will be any one who has stuck with their claim to fame long enough to receive a little notoriety for it. they are not unknown by any means, but they aren't household names yet either. there's little doubt about it, with one bad ( or exceptionally good ) media move, it's easy for a person to skip this level and become known for more things than just their talent. but those who have made this far and achieved a rising star will be set for life. they already have the love and attention and can grow to great heights with the very people who have been there for them since day one. their fans. just look at justin bieber. justin is arguably the most famous celebrity to have gotten his start on social media.

real life examples:  jenna marbles, local newscasters, gotye

FAMESQUE 

ideally, individuals who are considered to be famesque are on the same fame level those who have household names. the only minor difference is that famesque individuals might have caught a really lucky break, in one way or another, and those with household names have typically taken the time to build their careers, talent and fanbases. famesque refers to an individual who has achieved a definitive level of fame but not for their respective fields that they seek fame for. meaning, all of those women who became famous for being the mistresses of politicians. or it could even mean a musician, actor or athlete who happen to be blessed with some amazing genes and are more or less known for their physical attributes. famesque individuals have often done something to get tongues wagging. ideally, famesque people are more or less known for all of the wrong things. they are box office losers but winners in the media, because it's true what they say. bad press is still good press. just look at anna kournikova as an example. she's a decent tennis player. a better doubles player than she was in singles competition. and although she's a professional tennis player with a few doubles titles under her belt, she's more widely known for being extremely attractive in a marketable way. early 2000 was rife with sexy anna kournikova images for the whole world to see.

real life examples: sienna miller, monica lewinsky, balthazar getty, jessica simpson, brandi glanville

HOUSEHOLD NAMES 

all that hard work has paid off. to be considered for this group, it means that a certain individual has really earned his or her stripes well enough to be considered really famous. on the flip side, anyone who has the right surname or lucky enough to be born to the right parents might have a fast track to being considered a household name. either way, people who are considered to be household names means that they are widely enough known for what they do, at least known enough to be considered appropriate water cooler conversation. actors and actresses who star in their own tv shows ( or even those who have popular enough characters ) will be considered household names. musicians with a few hits under their names will be considered household names. athletes known for their prowess on the court or on the field can even be considered household names. businessmen ( and women ) who are changing the world with their products are good for it too. famous families and activists might also be considered house hold names. the kennedy family is a great example of this because while you might not be able to list them all by first names, you definitely know a few famous names to attach to the surname kennedy. household names are likely to remain as such for a long long time. individuals here are scratching the surface of what it means to be truly famous.

real life examples: ian somerhalder, the kennedy family, russell wilson, cameron diaz, dr. oz

TEEN IDOL

a teen idol is a celebrity with a large teenage fanbase. most teen idols these days have enormous crossover appeals, but some are still are names only young people might know and anyone over 25 might have to scratch their head on. teen idols are mostly musicians, but can be actors, models or even athletes. the only two main requirements to be considered a teen idol is to be within the appropriate age demopgraphic as his or her's target audience and to be massively adored by said demographic. expect lots of teen magazine covers and screaming fans left speechless by their mere presence. a teen idol can reach legend like status of fame, but it is guaranteed to never last. eventually teen idols get older and either start seeking more adult roles or fade away completely, either way, it's important to note that just because a teen idol is popular now doesn't mean it has to be the beginning or end. most teen idols are formally child stars too. ariana grande is a prime example of such teen idol. she'd gotten her start on a popular teen oriented nickelodeon show, now she's one of the most bankable pop superstars around.

real life examples: miley cyrus, one direction, zayn malik, demi lovato, hillary duff

IDOLS 

just like that thing that separates fan basers from those beginning their fifteen minutes, all idols are pretty much household names but true idols contain that longevity in their careers to sustain that level of fame that comes with it. idols can be long term rock stars who have inspired legions of artists or actors who have won over numerous awards in addition to hearts. additionally, idols can contain a bit of that 'it factor' found in it boys and girls that keeps hearts swooning. idols can be physically attractive specimen tailor made to titillate or franchise princes and princesses who are constantly in the public eye serving up more of the character(s) that the public loves so much. they can be super heroes on screen but in real life, they are real life heroes to many. they inspire and invoke a level of worship. they are not quite super stars because their claim to fame might be a bit narrow, it would require a person worthy of being considered an 'idol' to get their hands dirty and step outside the box of what ever their claim to fame happens to reside in. idols can also be models or activists who became more than just their cause.

real life examples: chris evans, mia hamm, gloria steinem, adriana lima, tyra banks, religion, mary kate & ashley olsen, tom brady, taylor swift,

SUPERSTARS 

superstars have it all. the fame. the money. the accolades. probably even some major awards under their belt. they are nearing the top of the fame ladder and for a lot of superstars, the ride is far from over yet. idols are almost as famous and renown, but idols tend to fall within a particular category of which they are famous for. true super stars transcend genres. they are basically baby legends. super stars are the go to guys and gals who get the first pick often times and are often looked at as real money makers. they've been in the fame game a while, typically honing one skill over another but make no mistake about it, true talent separates super stars from the rest of the pack and it's that talent that stands the test of time. superstars are hot right now. they are iconic. they are not going away any time soon. or so it seems. look at scarlett johansson for example. she came along in the late 90s / early 00s right along the same age as some majorly famous contemporaries. unlike the rest of them, however, scarlett has managed to build an awesomely impressive career playing an amazing collection of characters showing off her impressive acting range. in addition to her acting skills, she's also a renown vocalist.

real life examples: scarlett johansson, john cena, beyonce, mark whalberg, cam newton, lady gaga, leonardo dicaprio, justin timberlake,

[faithandfairies]

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nS3YhH7it8)

You know, this conversation with Snow reminds me of the one in 3x18. The one that led to Regina starting a relationship with Robin in the first place.

I knew the moment she kissed him in this episode that she realized she made a terrible mistake. That she wasn’t feeling it. She looked scared, all wide-eyed, but not in a good way.

I will say it again, I truly believe that in season 3 Regina realized that she had feelings for Emma. And having to be without Emma for a year, alongside being without Henry, I’m sure only drove it home.

Then Emma was the only person in the entirety of Storybrooke to believe in her (innocence) only to essentially take it back later.

She told Emma that it was obvious she and Hook were exchanging yearning looks and doey eyes.

(x)

Emma’s response was that she didn’t yearn. And Regina said that Hook sure did. Now I’m wondering if Regina wasn’t also projecting. She did say she and Hook were a lot alike. 

What’s also interesting is that Regina starts “going after” Emma in 3x17. Right after the episode that involves her fight with Zelena. Her first confrontation in Storybrooke with Zelena. It’s interesting that Zelena is also the one who ends up throwing both a wrench in Emma and Hook’s not yet existing relationship and who ends up essentially ruining Regina and Robin’s.

Why?

Because Dorothy is actually a lesbian icon. Or at least, in one of the movies, the actress who plays her, Judy Garland, was known to be a lesbian and it was a big deal I believe. The story has also been used with lgbtq characters before. In the TV Show, Lost Girl, Bo, a bisexual succubus, goes through a traumatic experience and it basically attracts a bug which bites her and leaves her in a coma. If I’m not mistaken the thing that gets her out of the coma is a kiss with the bug disguised as her best friend, Kenzi. Her entire journey in the coma is about knowing herself, facing parts of herself, and eventually accepting the kiss and the truth of the trauma she endured. Bo and Kenzi never become and item though, although Bo does end up with a woman on the show. The show made it clear from the start that Kenzi was straight. Even so her and Bo’s relationship is the best thing on the show. She’s pretty much the only person Bo would move heaven and earth for, and does. Like Regina did for Emma, Bo basically goes to another realm to get Kenzi back. Which is unheard of in Bo’s world, given Bo is a succubus, supposedly above humans, and Kenzi is a human. But what made me bring up this episode is that Bo’s entire dream-comaworld after the bug bite is basically Oz, where she is Dorothy.

(x)

Bo Dennis

Bo and Kenzi  (Using this as an opportunity to shamelessly promote this show because it’s awesome) 

(x)

Oz was also used on Supernatural, where Charlie, a lesbian, and Dean and Sam’s honorary sister leaves for Oz with Dorothy. I think it’s also revealed that Dorothy herself is gay, only I’m not sure.

(x)

Charlie and Dorothy on Supernatural

Not to mention that on OAT Dorothy is with Ruby.

So that’s why I think it’s interesting that Zelena’s arrival marked an important time in Swan Queen’s development. That she threw a wrench in every relationship these two women had with men, I mean, Robin, Hook, hell, Walsh was one of her minions. And...that she’s still here.

But in 3x17 none of that matters. Hook lies and Regina notices it. And tries to show Emma. She hopes to catch Hook in his lie so that Emma can decide for herself before she starts anything with Hook, not to. Only Regina didn’t count on Ariel not being Ariel. But Zelena. Just as she didn’t count on Marian not being Marian, but Zelena. I swear Emma and Regina’s relationships parallel each other so much it’s not even funny.

The interesting thing with Regina trying to use Ariel’s whereabouts to catch Hook in a lie is that Ariel’s story is the definition of “The truth will set you free.”

It’s the episode where Ariel tries to tell Eric who she is, while being fully exposed as who she is, but she loses her voice. Because Regina takes it from her.

It’s where Regina tells Ariel that there’s nothing worse than not being able to tell the one you love how you feel. That it’s even worse than telling them and being rejected. I’d call it Regina’s truth in Ariel’s title episode. Something she tries to change in 3x17.

Ariel’s is also the episode where Emma essentially closes her romantic chapter with Neal, saying she’ll always love him but that it doesn’t mean she wants to be with him. Where that truth literally sets Neal free.

It’s also where Emma first kisses Hook. And when asked about why she kissed him and how it was she says “I don’t know. I was feeling good.”

It’s interesting then that they revisit this, Ariel’s story and the importance of the truth, in 3x17, where Regina is clearly trying to prove Hook is lying. The question is, to what end? It would certainly “set Emma free”. In the sense that that moment was a defining moment for her. It’s the moment she literally decides to see the best in Hook. Only it’s based on a lie. So without that foundation I doubt there would have been a Captain Swan.

Then I think in that same episode, 3x17, Emma and Regina’s “I can show you the world” moment happens. Now they have been paralleling Aladdin and Jasmine in earnest.

Not to mention that Regina fully accepts the invitation to be part of the family. While Hook refuses.  

In the end, Regina’s plan to get Emma to see the truth fails. 

But in 3x18 she seems to try again. There is this awkward exchange between Emma and Regina as Emma talks about getting ready to face Zelena. Coincidentally, that episode is also about the hurt the truth can cause. How the truth essentially destroyed Cora’s life. Even the secret that Snow told which destroyed Regina’s life sort of comes back up. The thing is that they made Cora out to be a victim, when it was her own doing. She lied and then when asked for the truth she lied again. Only for the truth to be outed by someone else. 

Later Regina and Snow have a heart to heart, after Emma makes it clear she still sees Regina as the Evil Queen. The person who wouldn’t hesitate to hurt her family if the opportunity presented itself. Or who would at least feel no sympathy for her family if they were to get hurt at someone else’s hands.

Regina then goes after Robin. And starts their relationship with a kiss.

I genuinely think that at that point she was already in love with Emma. She just didn’t believe they stood a chance. And so she went after the sure thing, was okay with settling for the sure thing.

Now, I believe, things are different. I don’t think Regina wants to settle. I don’t think it’s just now and because it’s a different Robin that she feels nothing for him.

I think she realized in the season 4 finale, in the AU, that she didn’t want to be with Robin. She literally chose death over being with Robin in that AU.

She made it clear that her happy ending wasn’t a man. But then Emma tried to give her what she wished for, what Emma thought she wanted, her happy ending with Robin. Just like her other half tried to give Emma what Emma thought she wanted. What Emma wished for.

The thing is, the entirety of season 5 it was clear that Regina’s heart was no longer in her relationship with Robin. Even though she held onto it. I think she did it because she was trying to fulfill Emma’s wish that she be happy with Robin. Especially given what Emma gave up to make it happen. She wanted to believe.

And now Regina is trying to rekindle that “flame” with a Robin who doesn’t even remember her. Who isn’t even the Robin she remembers. So they don’t even have the little bit of history they had anymore. The love Robin had for her no longer exists, which I imagine makes pretending and holding on a hell of a lot harder.

And now she doesn’t owe it to Emma to stay with Robin. Emma is no longer the Dark One. And as I said, I think Regina is no longer willing to settle. Even though I think she wishes she did feel something for Robin. Enough to want to be with him, because I’m sure it would make her life a lot easier. Only she doesn’t and she can’t change how she feels.

I think she truly has moved on from Robin. I think she did so completely when she followed Emma to the wish realm. But at the same time she didn’t have closure. I think she loves Emma. The look on her face when Emma saved her doesn’t lie. It’s plain as day. 

(x)

But maybe she felt guilty for how she feels. Given how miserable Robin was in the wish realm. And how Emma is building a future with Hook.

But now not even that’s enough to make her settle for Robin.

Another thing that stood out this episode is that when Regina originally met the real Robin, she opened up to him immediately. She chose to, I believe, because he was meant to be her soulmate. If she couldn’t trust him who could she trust? So she chose to trust him with her heart, her plan, her doubts and fears. That isn’t Regina. Regina is closed off. She doesn’t open up easily. Here we see that, directed at Robin, finally.

He asks her about her and Robin’s story. And she doesn’t offer him an explanation. While she does open up to him, it’s the bare minimum. He points to her hearts and she tells him what they are. But she doesn’t elaborate. This is Regina. She doesn’t open up easily and if you want to know you have to work for it. Like her family did. She has no trouble opening up to Snow or Emma. Or at least, she may, but she feels safe enough to do it anyway. But we’re finally seeing how Regina, without the Queen’s hostility, reacts to someone who is a total stranger to her. Even one who seems to want to know her.

And truth be told, she doesn’t seem to want to know him. He tries to kill someone and she doesn’t even ask him why. Just makes him promise not to do it again. 

All of this tells me Regina knows, knew before she kissed him, that he isn’t what she truly wants. The kiss just confirmed it. 

[sunlitroom]

 @millicentcordelia said

I was glad to see this post. There’s been so much talk of Oswald not understanding what love is, or caring about another person. He made a huge sacrifice to keep Jim out of jail, and look at what it ended up costing him.

Oswald knew that Jim and Leslie were engaged, that she was expecting a baby. Oswald was never anything but nice to Leslie. He had no expectations by this point that Jim was going to return any feelings that he may have had for Jim. The most he could have been hoping for was friendship.

This also reminds me that Jim treated Oswald callously when Oswald was in Arkham and has never apologized or addressed that in any way.

@sunlitroom said

Yes - this idea that Oswald just learned that this is what love meant was silly.  He took the fall for Jim with no expectation of a favour in return.  It was unselfish and big-hearted.

It was why the ‘what good is love if it’s one-sided’ line was silly - because we know what good it is: it actually brought the best out of Oswald.

Even beyond romantic relationships - we see Oswald loves his parents.  He was willing to dance to Galavan’s tune to get Gertrud back, and cared for his ill father.  He was even desperate for his stepfamily to accept him, to the extent where he was willing to live as their servant.

When a storyline is dependent on the audience forgetting a whole load of plotpoints and characterisation - it’s a poor storyline.

@millicentcordelia - I think the scene in Jim’s hallucination has told us, at least, that it plays in his mind.  He knows Oswald put himself in danger’s way for him, he knows there’s a bond there, he knows he shouldn’t have left him behind.

One thing that’s tricky about that storyline is that although it’s hideous to the viewer - because we know what Hugo’s doing - Jim doesn’t know what’s actually going on.

He’s desperate to dissociate himself from Galavan’s murder - and so he does what he tends to do, puts himself on his moral high horse to create a division between himself and villains, because he’s terrified by how blurred that line is becoming.  

So he looks down on Oswald for taking an insanity plea, and tells himself that Oswald should probably be doing time for some other crimes anyway.  You see him weighing Oswald’s accusations about Hugo - there’s a flicker of doubt, and he looks him over - but it’s easier for him at that point to assume that Oswald is lying.  Yes - it’s lazy, and it’s cowardly, and it’s hypocritical - but I think that if he had actually known what was going on, he wouldn’t have left him there.  It would have been crossing the moral event horizon for him.

@littlehollyleaf said

@sunlitroom @millicentcordelia The way I’m understanding Ozzie supposedly just learning that love is about sacrificing personal happiness etc. is that the storyline is not trying to actually claim he hasn’t already experienced real love, but that:

a) Eddie is a twat (I say lovingly :p) who was utterly wrong about Ozzie’s ability to love, so his claims are not meant to count for much (and may have been based partly on misinformation - from what he knows of Ozzie’s relationship with Gertrude, it could seem Ozzie put his own criminal aspirations above her safety/happiness, and presumably Ed has no inkling of the depth of Ozzie’s sacrifices for Jim, seeing Oz lying for Jim as part of a failed alliance as opposed to a sign of selfless love?)

b) Ozzie’s own confusion about how to love and whether he was capable of it, and the way sacrificing for Eddie seemed a lightbulb moment for him, speaks to a deep lack of awareness/understanding of and insecurity about himself and his emotions. Like - I think there’s a case to be made that he never considered/recognised his feelings for Jim as love, even a friendship kind, but instead rationalised their relationship as a business friendship/alliance? (tho ofc in truth emotionally it WAS much more than that to Ozzie). Plus, he absolutely blames himself 100% for his mother’s death (see his Arkham dream!), so he maybe (probably?) believes he couldn’t have truly loved her or at least loved her right because if he did she wouldn’t have died. His father he didn’t know long enough to make sacrifices for, so never really had his loved ‘tested’ you could say, and well he did ofc kill his step-family, so probably doesn’t consider his feelings towards them as particularly loving because of that :p So the fact that he was delighted to have his love for Ed ‘proven’ seems a fitting reaction from him to me, because it’s potentially the only time (at least since his mother’s death) he has personally been both completely aware of his feelings and 100% sure of them as real/true/whatever.

So the ‘what good is love if it’s one sided?’ line - well yes WE have seen how good it was for Ozzie to love, but I imagine Ozzie himself wouldn’t have? Esp if we take it that he didn’t recognise his feelings for Jim as love - because that way, for Oz, his love for Ed would seem to be his first experience of romance, and as such it would be understandable for him to consider such an emotion as pointless if not returned I think?

Tl;dr - I don’t think the storyline was relying on the audience forgetting past plots and characterisation necessarily, because I think it was about developing/exploring Ozzie and Eddie’s own, flawed, understandings of each other and themselves and what personal love is supposed to feel/look like. While we, the audience, can see they are or have been mistaken when it comes to various assumptions.

Re: Jim - completely agree with your assessment. His rejection of Ozzie’s claims of torture and refusal to listen always made sense to me, callous as it seemed.

@sunlitroom said

I think, for me, this is one of this instances where you, as a viewer, are doing a ton of heavy lifting re: interpreting slipshod writing, and coming out with something way more intelligent and nuanced than the writers actually intended.

I think I can agree, to an extent, about Ed being shown to be wrong (he does wander into twatness frequently :D)  He’s prone to hubris – and we see him falter here when he realises he was wrong about Oswald’s capacity for love and self-sacrifice.  I still sort of feel, though, that we’re not asked to consider Ed’s knowledge of Oswald’s past as faulty (it’s never mentioned or nodded at here at all) – but rather that we’re supposed to think, and be taken aback, along with Ed - that Oswald has suddenly demonstrated the capacity for love for the first time.

Like - I think there’s a case to be made that he never considered/recognised his feelings for Jim as love, even a friendship kind, but instead rationalised their relationship as a business friendship/alliance? (tho ofc in truth emotionally it WAS much more than that to Ozzie)

I think, though, Oswald’s frustration in interactions with Jim was precisely because he felt Jim refused to acknowledge what Oswald felt was a deeper connection.  He’s insistent on crossing the business line, much to Jim’s frequent discomfort.  Then they gave us that daft line about love being no good when it’s one-sided, and that discontented little look, which was a tacit acknowledgment of Oswald’s feelings on that front.  

(I hope you don’t mind me adding your tags because you stash half your argument in there, and then it disappears in the reblog, which seems a shame :))

#it occurs to me i’ve posted several things talking about ozzie sacrificing himself for ed as character development/growth#i guess i was seeing that more in terms of his understanding of romantic love specifically#which i was taking as something he only knew how to experience selfishly#because i don’t see him as recognising his feelings for jim as romantic#…or maybe even his love for eddie specifically#which i thought the show was going to keep as a selfish love#in any case - i can’t deny ozzie has loved deeply and selflessly before ed#and if i implied otherwise i was wrong about that - whoops and sorry!

I think this is probably something that will be very much YMMV - because I can see your idea is valid, but I came away with the opposite idea.  I’d already seen Oswald experience what read as (so unsubtly it was almost not subtext)  romantic attraction, deliberately take the fall for Jim with no deal in place to protect him, willingly offer to make sure Lee was safely out of the city, then ask her not to think badly of him - in short, demonstrate pretty much the opposite of what we saw him do with Ed and Isabella, where he was selfish and destructive.

And I think that’s why the pairing (as portrayed in the storyline, I have no issue with whatever shipping people do) made me so tetchy.  I was simultaneously seeing something that looked nothing like what we had been shown Oswald was capable of in terms of love and generosity, but then I was asked to swallow it as not only romantic, but as evidence that Oswald could love.  And I just felt not only was this the sort of repetitive storytelling that annoyed me with the Van Dahl stuff, but I just found it wilfully ignored so much previous characterisation and story.  

And yes - re: Jim, I think s2 Jim can be summed up as ‘disappointing’.  It’s definitely a nadir for him.

Tl;dr

Ed - can be a twat

s2 Jim - disappointing

Oswald - capable of love

:D

@littlehollyleaf said

I think, for me, this is one of this instances where you, as a viewer, are doing a ton of heavy lifting re: interpreting slipshod writing, and coming out with something way more intelligent and nuanced than the writers actually intended.

A very sweet way of saying I’m reading perhaps too much into things :p Fair point though - I’m used to analysing texts from a ‘Death of the Author’ perspective, so my grasp on authorial intent can be weak (and is also something I’m not generally interested in, which is why I try and avoid considering writer intent as much as possible… and always inevitably fail with WIP tv shows! see: much of our discussions about Isabella).

At the end of the day then - screw the writers, right? :p Ozzie is and always has been capable of selfless love and his relationship with Eddie and Eddie’s machinations didn’t reveal anything new on that front. Agree.

And I also agree, personally, that his crush on Jim was insanely obviously romantic - certainly I was reading it that way pretty much from the start! …however, as obvious as it might have seemed, his feelings for Jim were never explicitly shown/stated as romantic or even explicitly shown/stated as love, meaning there was, I think, a significant level of plausible deniability that meant his feelings COULD be, and probably WERE by a fair few viewers, read as non-romantic and not love (if either he or Jim were female that probably wouldn’t have been the case, but blah)… Ergo, while Ozzie’s relationship with Ed most certainly was NOT the first evidence given of Ozzie’s capacity/ability to love (both in general and romantically), it was at least the first time the show had provided explicit evidence of his capacity for romantic love, so… idk, that’s a thing maybe? …a good thing from a representation perspective, debatably, but, yeah, somewhat annoying in terms of characterisation, at least the way it was written, because, gah, yeah, the explicitness with Eddie is probably part of what makes Ozzie’s feelings for him come across as his first experience of romantic love period, and thus, like you say, suggests it was via his feelings for Ed he learnt HOW to love and that we were being shown he COULD love, ah, yes, that’s annoying… (perhaps if the show were to be more explicit about his feelings for Jim now it would help…?)

in any case, I’ve warmed to my own interpretation of Ozzie in himself not consciously recognising his feelings for Jim as romantic or even as love now though, so I might chew on it for a while :p Like, I don’t think it necessarily contradicts what you’re saying about him feeling he and Jim had a ‘deeper connection’ than just business, that he was subsequently upset Jim refused to acknowledge - you can argue it’s just that Ozzie didn’t understand that connection was love, let alone that it was a one-sided love. He just knew he cared for/about Jim and wanted to help him. So it’s like… when Ozzie was just feeling/experiencing romantic love, he was instinctively selfless (protecting Jim, helping Lee etc. with no real thought to having his feeling reciprocated), but then with Ed he actually LABELLED his emotion as romantic love and that made a difference to his behaviour… potentially… plus there’s a whole different dynamic with him and Ed where Ed initially sought Ozzie out and had a bit of a hero-worship thing going on and all the ways Ed presented himself as a substitute for Gertrude, which perhaps made it seem like Ed and Ed’s love SPECIFICALLY was Ozzie’s to claim, leading him to covet Ed’s love when it was denied him, in a way that doesn’t exist with Jim… and then we can factor in all Ozzie’s loss/trauma in-between his selfless loving of Jim and falling in love with Ed, which we can argue made him more inclined to be selfish and cling harder to the people he cared about for fear of losing them, hence why his manner of loving Ed was so different to how he loved Jim… (sorry I’m rambling now! this is just me thinking through ideas, not making any claims as to whether this was intended or comes across esp. in the show proper!).

(and sorry OP, this got rather involved! - we might have to take this discussion to a new post if we wanna keep going :p)

@littlehollyleaf - took your advice and started a new post :)  Many apologies for taking so long to respond - buried under deadlines.

A very sweet way of saying I’m reading perhaps too much into things :p Fair point though - I’m used to analysing texts from a ‘Death of the Author’ perspective, so my grasp on authorial intent can be weak (and is also something I’m not generally interested in, which is why I try and avoid considering writer intent as much as possible… and always inevitably fail with WIP tv shows! see: much of our discussions about Isabella).

Ha! :D  I do genuinely think your reading is better than the writers’ likely intentions.

I know what you mean, though, as regards taking a ‘Death of the Author’ approach, my background is Eng Lit, so I tend to do it too.  Playing in the spaces and parsing motivation is fun. I think the thing is that I get grumpy if the writing moves from leaving fun gaps in the text, to huge whopping chasms  – and then get distracted by fulminating over it.

At the end of the day then - screw the writers, right? :p Ozzie is and always has been capable of selfless love and his relationship with Eddie and Eddie’s machinations didn’t reveal anything new on that front. Agree.

Gracefully gliding past Gotham’s writing infelicities is the only way to keep watching. :)

 And I also agree, personally, that his crush on Jim was insanely obviously romantic - certainly I was reading it that way pretty much from the start! …however, as obvious as it might have seemed, his feelings for Jim were never explicitly shown/stated as romantic or even explicitly shown/stated as love, meaning there was, I think, a significant level of plausible deniability that meant his feelings COULD be, and probably WERE by a fair few viewers, read as non-romantic and not love (if either he or Jim were female that probably wouldn’t have been the case, but blah)…

I think Jim and Oswald are presented much more as the kind of subtext that anyone who liked, say, Clex, would be familiar with.  There’s something there, but we’re never going to state it outright, nudge nudge, wink wink.  It’s interesting – I was actually talking about this elsewhere, and we wondered whether that’s why Oswald’s interest in Jim is allowed to be much more sexual: because everything’s going to stay subtext, and therefore safe.  Showing sexual interest when romantic intentions have been made explicit… not permitted, apparently.  It’s going to be totally subjective, of course, whether you take that from a scene, but it’s something that struck me about this storyline.

 in any case, I’ve warmed to my own interpretation of Ozzie in himself not consciously recognising his feelings for Jim as romantic or even as love now though, so I might chew on it for a while :p Like, I don’t think it necessarily contradicts what you’re saying about him feeling he and Jim had a ‘deeper connection’ than just business, that he was subsequently upset Jim refused to acknowledge - you can argue it’s just that Ozzie didn’t understand that connection was love, let alone that it was a one-sided love.

I can see how that interpretation works – it’s just that one line that argues against it for me – what good is love if it’s one-sided?  To be honest though - like you - there’s a lot I’ll have to chew over with this storyline until I can make it work for me.  It’ll be interesting to see how they proceed in the next part of the season.

[buffster]

Inca Mummy Girl (BTVS 2.04)

This is part of my ongoing Buffy Project, where I write notes/meta for every episode in an attempt to better understand the characters and themes of the show. You can find the full list here. Gifs are not mine.

Sunnydale’s latest adventure: exchange students! Is it really any surprise one of them won’t be making it back home? The ones who left Sunnydale should probably just stay gone. It’s interesting how contained these episodes are. If Buffy’s exchange student went missing she was questioned during an investigation. How did they explain a male student going missing and being replaced by a female student who is also now missing? Maybe our evil Mayor is protecting the students from all that. 

The Point this episode is to compare Buffy’s life with that of an ancient girl sacrificed by her tribe at just sixteen. The girl responds by rejecting her duty and is willing to kill to live a normal life. Buffy chose the right path. Also Ampata’s body guard is Billy Black from Twilight. Just saying.

Despite being rejected in Prophecy Girl, Xander’s feelings for Buffy clearly haven’t gone away. He’s still jealous over every guy she looks at twice. But there’s nothing wrong with unrequited love unless you’re putting the pressure on someone. Buffy, for her part, either enjoys the attention or has gone back to playing dumb. Willow is hurt when she overhears Xander saying he doesn’t think of her That Way and decides it’s time to move on. Easier said than done.

Xander falls for an ill advised person for the second time in Ampata, the ancient mummy. He falls for her seemingly simply because she’s pretty and likes him. Not the most mature, but pretty standard for teenage boys. He also says, “Man I love you!” when she says she doesn’t deserve him. Her admiration of him is the attraction, not her self. Ampata does seem to care for him and at first refuses to kill him to live, but when desperation truly hits she tries to do it anyway. Buffy is there to stop her.

Oz has arrived! He’s apparently not interested in Normal Girls and notices Willow because she dresses up as an Eskimo. Xander seems weirded out by the outfit choice and doesn’t really try to hide it.

I enjoyed Sven pretending he didn’t speak English because he hated Cordelia. It was good to see the episode didn’t end with HAHA foreigners. 

Character Notes:

Jonathan Levinson: The continuity in Buffy never ceases to amaze me. We see a shot of Jonathan sitting alone in the background at the Bronze, stirring his drink and looking lonely. 

Honestly? This episode didn’t do a lot for me. Not one of the best.

[houstonphotojourney]

Today I had the pleasure of entering the Russian General store in Houston, Texas and having the chance to sit down and speak with Mr. Alexander Kogan while his business partner, Ms. Anna Levitin tended to the business, they have shared for over 20 years! Ms. Levitin is a bit shy and didn’t wish to be photographed, although you’ll have to trust me that she is quite the attractive lady!  Smart as a whip too according to Mr. Kogan! I think he feels a bit badly that she’s been taking on so much more than her fair share of the work load since he became ill as he mentioned his gratitude more than once toward Ms. Anna Levitin.  Very touching to see these two friends in business together still after so many years.  What a team!

Mr. Alexander Kogan – Partner/Owner of The Russian General Store

Mr. Kogan was born in Bukhara, Uzbekistan back when it was part of the Soviet Union – it is now an independent state.  However, he spent the majority of his years growing up in Leningrad, (now St. Petersburg).  Although he has travelled quite a bit in his lifetime!

Mr. Kogan was kind enough to send me this photo of him from his travels in Central Asia (back row with beard)

Mr. Kogan (left) in Central Asia

When I asked Mr. Kogan why he came to America? He replied, “Curiosity!”.  What a bold move!!! He had to give up his Russian citizenship in order to come to America. Back home in the Soviet Union, Mr. Kogan was a degreed Biologist and Zoologist. He was helped upon his arrival and supported by an International rescue committee. Initially, he took a job in a commercial printing company.  Kogan had been a photographer in the Soviet Union and soon realized by his estimate, that the Soviet Union was lagging behind by about 30 years where photography was concerned so he quickly caught up.  Nowadays, there is not a lag however in technology at all in Russia.  Eventually he became the Head of a Research Photography Unit at Baylor College of Medicine. One thing led to another and he ended up here with Ms. Levitin and this marvelous Russian General Store!  Although Mr. Kogan has never returned to his homeland, he does still Skype with his remaining family back home.  

  Adorable, hand-painted Russian gifts are throughout the store and are gorgeous! I loved the card selection too!

I could have sat and listened to Mr. Kogan and asked him questions for hours!!! He has that gleam in his eye of mischief and a great sense of humor to match his fun personality!! Ms. Anna Levitin on the other hand, was steadily busy running the store while we were chatting it up.  According to Mr. Kogan,  his partner, Ms. Levitin has been doing the majority of the work running the store since he became ill.  You can tell just how appreciative he is that he has a strong woman like Ms. Levitin as the primary care-taker of The Russian General Store!

  There are tons of books, trinkets, and food! I was thinking how nice it would be for a Russian child to have a book from “home” when living/visiting here long-term. Nice to know where their parents can shop to bring some comforts of home to their new home here!

When I asked him what his favorite thing in America was, he stated, “In Russia you belong to the government, here to yourself”.  He had me laughing about how when he first arrived he just ate nothing but meat practically his first 15 years here as in Russia it was so expensive that you were unable to get the same meat, etc. back then.  It is impossible for us here in America to truly be able to understand all the differences in culture, lifestyle, etc. and times have also changed since, for both countries. Although, he did feel Russian’s in general might be happier or at least have fewer worries such as medical care as everyone has health coverage there. Education is also at no cost provided you pass the required tests. Of course one must be sure to realize that this was 37 years ago that Mr. Kogan recalls these memories and is quick to point out that Russia is no longer this way.

  The Russian General Store at 9629 Hillcroft Avenue, Houston, TX 77096 has a fantastic collection of Russian and other hard to find beer and wine from all over the world!

  Even Kosher Wine! But I liked seeing all the different foods the most!

Mr. Kogan has a son here in Houston, Mikhail.  Mikhail turns out is an artist!  So, you know me…I HAD to see his work!!!  I am fortunate enough that Mr. Kogan sent me a few images of his work – thanks!

  I love the use of the bold colors of Mikhail’s works and although they are a bit “dark” in nature, I think a lot of children are terrified of Santa and it sorta cracked me up! You can see more of Mikhail’s works on Facebook.

Mikhail Kogan’s artistic concentration is mainly rooted in surrealism, post-modern expressionism and abstract art. Through the use of colored pencils, water colors, acrylic paint, and charcoal, Mikhail creates original works of art with meaning and personal expression. Mikhail creates unique originals and commissioned art that is open to individual interpretation and understanding. 

I also learned of Mr. Kogan and his partner. Ms. Anna Levitin’s sponsorship of “Around The Corner”, which is a Folk Dancing Center and Children’s Theatre. What generous people! Hear Anna puts a lot of work into this as well!! Seems Ms. Levitin is always on the go and working hard!

“Za Uglom” (“Around the corner”): their dancing group “Uzori” and rehearsal of children theater for their performance of “The wizard of Oz”

Nice that the dance troop and children’s theatre is so close to their hearts!

What a great collection of interesting items!! I HAD to get 2 chocolate eggs with prizes inside!

Hope you enjoyed!  Next time you want to treat yourself to a fun adventure, check out The Russian General Store! 

As always, I thank each of you for your support and value you all! Thanks for visiting!

Elizabeth and Max

Russian General Store in Houston, Texas Today I had the pleasure of entering the Russian General store in Houston, Texas and having the chance to sit down and speak with Mr.