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makmalaon · 3 days

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The Coiled Serpent (Our Holy Saints Of Death 1)

This is part of a short story collection which I’m publishing to help promote a future novel with the same characters and plots. I’d love to get these stories translated into Spanish before the end of 2025 but right now I’m homeless and it’s not really my main priority. I’m also hoping to finish my novel around that time and will pitch as many people as I can once that happens.

I proofread and copyedited these stories myself. Once I’m in a better situation, I’d love to republish these stories after I’ve paid for the stories to get properly proofread and copy edited by someone else.

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Sweat dripped from my brows and onto the floor. A middle aged woman in the organic food aisle had one mini electric fan in each hand and she shook her head while looking at the prices of the Kefir in the dairy aisle.

“Dear valued customers, we’re sorry to report that the AC is broken and we’re doing everything we can to fix it. We appreciate your understanding and cooperation.”

The woman threw her hands up and walked towards the exit. The aisles around me were empty and I started putting as much of the products from the shelves into a black garbage bag. I wore my custom realistic face mask which I bought from a popular Hollywood prop designer. The cameras don’t scare me. I want people to know what I’m doing. As I walk out, I rub my Jesus Malverde pendant.

“Channel his spirit by imagining him giving you a pep talk whenever you need an extra boost of motivation.” Said old man Hernandez, the elderly drunk man who introduced me to the folk saint when I was a teenager.

Ever since he died 4 years ago, I’d get flashbacks to things he taught me as a kid. He was a grifter but he was one of the few people who was nice to me. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I realized he was grooming me and doing a long con by getting me to do a lot of his grunt work under the guise of mentorship.

As I walked out with the garbage bag full of products, I could sense people looking at me but I walked straight ahead. My vision blurred as I felt my heartbeat in my stomach. This grocery store was in Polanco so the security guard was a working class guy who hated all the smug rich people there. The guy gave me a head nod as I walked out and he looked at my bag.

When I got to the parking lot Juanito and Leonardo were waiting for me in a SUV with tinted windows.

“Chino what the hell are you doing man?” Said Leo.

“I got some groceries for the week.”

“What the hell boss?” Said Juanito.

“I hate these uppity fucks. They used to look down on me when I was homeless.”

“Couldn’t you think of some other way to fuck with them? You’re the leader of the largest cartel in the city. You make millions of dollars a year. None of this shit makes any sense.” Said Juanito.

“You wouldn’t understand man. It’s not about that.”

“Juan find a way to delete the security footage. Bribe and intimidate the employees if you have to. Do whatever you need to get this done.”

“C’mon you don’t have to do this.”

“I don’t know if you’re going through another one of your episodes again but you gotta find a better way to deal with your issues. I know this great psychologist you can talk to. Seriously, she’s one of the best in Mexico.”

“Look Chino, I love you dude but we can’t keep doing shit like this man. It’s fucking exhausting.” Said Juanito.

“Nothing’s gonna happen to me or anyone in the crew. These people know who we are and they’re all scared of us.”

“All it takes is one person to fuck everything up Chino. I asked you to be the main guy because you’re a man of the people. The average person likes you. If you keep doing reckless stuff like this then you’ll lose their trust.”

“I don’t want them to trust me. I don’t want them to like me. I don’t care about their validation. I hate everyone and everything outside of the crew.”

“You don’t really mean that. I still remember what you told me from that night.”

I gave the groceries and a stack of 500 peso bills to a woman outside the bakery next to the parking lot.

“Sir you’re an angel.”

She broke down in tears.

Cloudy skies as I walked up the hills of the Tlalpan neighborhood. I heard rumbling as I huffed and puffed on my way to Leonardo De La Cruz’s place. I looked towards the clouds and saw bright glitter, dahlia and chrysanthemum fireworks.

I met Leo at a La Santa Muerte chapel in Tepito. He was there every week just like me. Him and his wife seemed nice enough and he would always be there with this gorgeous thin woman with sunkissed skin, jet black hair and bright hazel eyes.

He didn’t talk much but from the few times he spoke, I could tell he was well educated. I saw him wearing a shirt with the CMLL logo and we bonded over our love of pro wrestling. We went to a show at Arena Mexico one day and I got way too hammered. I couldn’t hide my excitement although he didn’t drink because Leo told me it was one of the worst things someone could do for their brain health. He didn’t seem judgmental about it and he matched my energy. We were screaming from the top of our lungs for half the show. We both hated the opening matches because they were pretty boring but there were some exciting spots from time to time.

He invited me over to his place after that because he said he wanted to talk to me about something important. The Lucha fan avoided telling me what it was over the phone because they wanted to tell me face to face.

My foggy breath irritated me because anything outside of hot or warm weather made me sick. I’d been that way since I was a child and I’ve seen over a dozen doctors and specialists who couldn’t diagnose me with anything.

The gates opened and I saw him holding a water bottle.

“You look like you could use this.”

“Yeah thanks.”

“Did you walk here or something?”

“I took the bus but got lost and had to walk around a bit.”

“Why didn’t you just take a taxi or something? Aren’t you rich from all your schemes?”

“I like taking the bus.”

He laughed as I drank the water bottle in under 30 seconds.

“Your place looks like a castle.”

“My parents used to own this house and I inherited it when they died.”

“My condolences.”

“It happened 10 years ago. Mom died of cancer and dad died of natural causes.”

“My parents died in a car accident when I was in middle school.”

“We have a lot in common.”

“No offense but you looked kinda stuck up. I didn’t think I’d have so much in common with you.”

“That’s part of the reason I invited you here.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Have you ever heard of the CDMX new generation cartel?”

“They’re all over the news. There are posters and graffiti all around the Centro Historico about them.”

“What do you think of them?”

“They do good work. I like their message and methods. I don’t really buy their whole ‘we're not like the other cartels gimmick.’”

“Do you know anything about their leader?”

“I’ve heard a lot of rumors. Like how it’s not just one person but multiple people. A lot of people speculate that it’s a combination of all the cartel bosses in CDMX working together.”

“It’s just one guy.”

“How do you know?”

“Let’s have dinner before we talk business.”

Bianca brought out some medium well ribeye steaks with mashed potatoes and asparagus.

“What? Don’t tell me you’re vegetarian or something.” Said his wife.

She smelled like roses and strawberries. At the church, the men couldn’t keep her eyes off that curvy body and perfectly symmetrical face. Her wavy hair went down to her chest. All the women either wanted to be her or they envied them.

“No way. This food looks lovely. I wasn’t expecting something so fancy.”

“Get used to it. I want everyone I do business with to eat well.”

“Don’t bring that up right now. Let’s have fun first. You’re too serious sometimes mi amor.”

“Alright sorry.”

The way they looked at each other reminded me of the cheesy romance movies my ex-girlfriend made me watch. It was so over the top that one would think they were performing. He told me they were childhood friends and knew that they would be together forever.

“This is the best steak I’ve ever had.”

“You’re so sweet.”

“Seriously, I mean I typically hate western food but this is amazing. I usually hate asparagus but this is amazing. The tequila is so amazing too.”

“The secret ingredient is love. She’s a love witch. It’s in everything she does.” Said Leo.

“Why are you giving away my secrets?”

“Chino’s a good guy. He can keep a secret.”

Leo really had it all and I can’t help but feel jealous. All the women I’ve dated throughout my life were abusive towards me. Mostly psychological and emotional but sometimes physical. I don’t think he’s ever had to struggle for anything in his life and our worldviews are so similar. Most of the rich people I’ve ever met were smug, arrogant and out of touch with the rest of the world. I don’t get that feeling about him.

He was nice and kind to just about everyone he came into contact with. A lot of the women at the church were in love with him but they know to keep that to themselves because they’re terrified his partner would beat them up or cast a spell on them. She was known throughout the La Santa Muerte community for being a powerful witch with the power to heal people with her presence and also hex anyone who stood in her way. They were like a power couple in that community. I overheard some girls saying how they dreamed of being in a relationship like that.

After dinner we headed towards the upper levels where he had a home gym.

“Damn this place is perfect. This is the first home gym I’ve seen that wasn’t just a bunch of dumbbells and a flat bench.”

“I gotta do compound lifts. I wouldn’t feel right without them. You look like you workout a lot.”

“When I went to Canada I met a guy who showed me how to workout and diet. I fell in love with it immediately.”

“You’re built like a luchador.”

“People say the same about you Leo.”

“I always wanted to be a pro-wrestler but life had other plans.”

“Doesn’t every guy dream to be one when they’re a kid?”

“I guess. I was really serious about training though. I had plans to go to the Arena Mexico headquarters and train.”

“What stopped you?”

“Bianca can’t stand to see me fighting.”

“Does she know that it isn’t real?”

“C’mon don’t be disrespectful. I thought you’d know better as a fan.”

“I’m not trying to show any disrespect. Most of my ex-girlfriends thought that shit was real.”

“She knows the outcomes are predetermined but of course the injuries are real. I blew my knee out trying to squat 4 plates before I was set to start training and it freaked her out. She yelled at me for days and pleaded that I drop my plans to be a lucha. I’m glad I listened to her. I like my current job.”

“Yeah you said you were a doctor and an entrepreneur right?”

“I have a PHD in psychology. I was gonna be a psychologist but life had other plans.”

“Why did you wanna become a psychologist?”

“My cousin was one of my closest friends growing up. He had ADHD. Kids bullied him relentlessly. I tried to stick up for him whenever I could but he lived on the other side of town. He killed himself in 6th grade.”

“Holy shit. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It made me so depressed going into middle school. If Bianca wasn’t there for me then I don’t know where I’d be. My parents made me talk to this psychologist and she changed my life. I wanted to have that impact on other people.”

“Why didn’t you become a psychologist?”

“I want to change CDMX and Mexico. I’d only be able to impact a few dozen or a few hundred people if I got into that line of work.”

“You say that with so much conviction.”

“It’s my life’s mission.”

“How do you plan on doing that?”

He pulled out a gold diamond encrusted chain.

“CCDMXNG? You’re that much of a fan?”

“It’s one of a kind.”

“I’m so confused.”

“I’m not some delusional egotistical moron. I started small. First Tlalpan and after that I spread my work in surrounding neighborhoods.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m the leader of the CCDMXNG.”

“Don’t fuck with me like that.”

“I wouldn’t do that. Why else would I have this chain made?”

We looked at one another for what felt like 5 minutes.

“Why are you telling me this?”

“People wouldn’t support someone like me as the leader of this group.”

“I don’t think anyone would ever suspect you as the leader of a cartel.”

“That works in my favor but there are so many frauds coming out everyday claiming to be the leader. It’s getting difficult for my crew to shut them down. It’s time for a real leader to step up.”

“Does Bianca know about all this?”

“We tell each other everything.”

“Ok I still don’t know why you’re telling me these things.”

“People like you. You’re charismatic. Your story is touching and relatable to many.”

“You need to be more direct with me.”

“I’d like you to be the face of the CCDMXNG.”

“So you basically want me to be your puppet.”

“No. I want you to be my partner.”

“And If I say no?”

“You’re free to walk away at any time.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. There has to be more to his plan. I remembered all those times with the old man grifter where he’d intersperse moments of kindness, compassion and empathy as part of the long con. Everything he’s told me so far tracks. I researched him and his life because he seemed almost too good to be true. He doesn’t have a criminal record. His parents were saints who donated to churches, social justice causes and the poor.

“What’s your end goal with all of this?”

“I need money and guns to change things. We can’t beat the cartels, corrupt officials or anyone noteworthy without those things.”

“More violence won’t change anything. So many people tried similar things and failed.”

“You’re a smart guy.”

“Being smart, relatable and charismatic won’t be enough. People are still going to hate me and want me dead. There will still be so much bloodshed in the streets.”

“Whether I choose to do something about it or not, violence is inevitable. I do my best to minimize that with every campaign we do but I can’t completely eliminate it.”

“I can’t see myself being a boss of a cartel. I want to change this city, country and even the world at large but I’m just some bum.”

“You’re so harsh on yourself. You’re one of the smartest and most interesting people I know. Based on the stories I’ve heard from the people at the church, you’re capable of just about anything you put your mind to.”

“Stop blowing smoke up my ass.”

“I’m sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable but I’m being sincere. I’ve seen you near Centro Historico giving money, clothes and food to the homeless. I’ve heard you literally give the shirt off your back for a friend in need. It’s rare to meet genuine people like you.”

“How does that make me a good cartel boss?”

“Every cartel boss is just a money hungry greedy bastard. They only give to the needy to gain power over them. You don’t care about that sort of thing. You truly want what’s best for everyone.”

“I’m through with that greater good bullshit. I’ve accepted that the world is as it is because people like it that way and they don’t want to fight hard enough to improve it.”

“I know you’re a kind soul. You don’t truly believe that. The common folk were beaten down and manipulated by bad actors. All they need is someone to show them the way and you’re that person. I want to help you. Most of the top guys from the crew know about you too. They agree with me.”

“How do they know about me?”

“We’re everywhere. Even the churches. You’ve already met some of them,”

“Is that guy you always hang out with part of the crew?”

“Juanito? The short pudgy dog faced guy? Yeah he’s my right hand guy.”

“How many people are in your inner circle?”

“7 people.”

“Why are you trusting me with this information?”

“Because I trust you.”

“You know about my past. You know about what I do and you trust me?”

“You mean the fraud stuff? That’s the exact reason I need your help. We need money to fund our operations and I figured you could teach our guys how to scam. We heard you’re a wizard at credit card fraud, identity theft and scamming in general.”

“What leads you to believe you wouldn’t scam me?”

“You don’t scam everyone. I think you have a good heart underneath all that. Good people do awful things sometimes. I’m the head of a cartel for fucks sake.”

“You know how the cliche goes. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.”

“I can’t sit around and let this country go to shit any longer. You know gringos use the word Mexican as a slur? I want to change that. I want this place to be somewhere people can be proud of.”

“I want that too but I don’t know if I’ll be much help.”

“Take some time to think it over. It’s a lot to take in.”

“Fine, I’ll do that.”

“It’s getting late, do you want me to call you a taxi or something?”

“No, I'll be fine.”

“How are you getting home?”

“I’ll take the bus.”

“At this hour? No way. You’re more than welcome to stay the night. We have a guest room ready and everything.”

Thunder and rain drops on the windows. He put his hands on his shoulder.

“It’s raining and I won’t take no for an answer. The streets are gonna be flooded in a few minutes. Come downstairs. I’ll show you the guest room.”

I wouldn’t have time to get my stuff out of the 24 hour gym and I don’t want to deal with getting my clothes wet. I didn’t bring an umbrella or raincoat.

“Fine. I’ll be out first thing in the morning and I don’t need any breakfast.”

“Don’t worry about that. Just focus on getting a good night’s rest.”

The guest house was the size of a one bedroom apartment. This bed was bigger than anything I’ve ever slept on. It looked to be Alaskan sized. It was clean and there was even a big screen TV mounted in front of the bed.

The roosters clucking woke me up. The sun was bright. I heard a Selena Quintanilla song playing near the kitchen area. I made my way there because I smelled eggs and bacon.

“How was your sleep?” Said Bianca.

“I slept really well. Where’s Leo?”

“He had some business to take care of.”

“Thanks for having me as a guest.”

“Wait, are you leaving right now? You haven’t even had breakfast yet.”

“I don’t want to intrude.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I made extra servings for you.”

“You two have done so much for me already.”

“Oh don’t worry about it. Come sit down.”

Huevos Ranchero with bacon and a cup of freshly squeezed orange juice. This is the best variation I’ve ever had. She really is a witch.

“This is amazing as always.”

“You’re so sweet. Leo was right about you.”

“He told me about his business.”

“Which business is that?”

“I don’t want to say it out loud.”

“It’s safe here. He gets this place checked for bugs and he’s really paranoid about his operation’s security.”

“He wants me to be the face of his operation.”

“He told me about that. I see why he’d want you as the head.”

“Why is that?”

“You’re a truly kind, genuine and considerate person.”

“Did he tell you about what I do?”

“That you’re a credit card and check fraudster?”

“I do all types of fraud.”

“That doesn’t bother me. People are more than the things they do. My husband runs a cartel and he’s not a terrible person to me.”

“I don’t see why he needs me.”

“He’s really self conscious about people judging him. He doesn’t think he’d garner enough support to accomplish his goals. Don’t tell him I said that.”

These two seem completely genuine based on the way they carried themselves. I’m always on guard around people due to the neglect and psychological abuse I’ve endured from my parents. She knew the perfect words to disarm me every single time.

Old man Hernandez did a number on my ability to trust people. He’d always tell me that everything was a scam and he meant that in the literal sense. He would tell me that everything was just a scam perpetuated by some high level magick user. The scam mentor loved the occult, especially Alistair Crowley. Identities were just a way for people to control you according to him. Despite that he had this deep nationalistic sense of pride when it came to Mexico.

“Leo’s a good man. I wouldn’t marry him if he was another power hungry criminal. He really wants to change this city and country for the better. I know you do as well deep down.”

“I don’t think I’m the person to do it.”

“All the women at the church are in love with you. They think you’re the kind hearted bad boy. Some of them think they can change you. Others don’t care and like you as you are.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“Don’t be coy. I know you notice some of those women eye fucking you. It’s cute that you’re blushing.”

“Some of them.”

“Lots of them.”

“Do you think that’s enough to persuade people on our side?”

“Enough people. I heard you can sing too. That’s common with Filipino people right? You could always become an R&B singer. I heard you singing at church once.”

“I’m also Chinese and Mexican. Does that cancel things out?”

“Don’t be rude. Mexican people can sing too.”

“So can some Chinese people but I don’t want to be some sort of celebrity. I hate being in the spotlight.”

“You looked really happy on stage. I think you’re just shy.”

She had this aura that made people fall in love with her. I’ve been doing Kundalini Yoga like my mentor Justin Santos showed me four years ago and I’m starting to see the colors of the different energies people projected. I don’t know if I’m losing my mind because that guy is crazy although he says a lot of insightful things too.

“I’m grateful that you made so much delicious food for me.”

“Are you leaving so soon? Leo’s gonna be here in about half an hour. I think Juanito’s gonna be with him. He’d be thrilled to formally meet you. Do you have anywhere to be?”

“I guess I could stay for another half an hour.”

“Great. I gotta go on the StairMaster for an hour.”

“Woah, that's a lot.”

“It’s how I keep my tummy flat. Plus I feel awful when I don’t do at least an hour of cardio a day. You look like you lift a lot of weights.”

“I got into it after I moved to Canada for a few years.”

“You’re just like Leo. He had to slow down after an injury. He’s still fit and lifts a lot but lighter weights with higher volume.”

“I’m gonna go out for a walk and grab some smokes.”

“Oh no you smoke cigarettes.”

“Yeah it’s a nasty habit I picked up in middle school.”

“I hope you quit soon. The world needs you to be in top shape when you take it over with Leo.”

As she walked away I tried not to look at her round ass and slim waist. My ex told me that women had a supernatural sense for that sort of thing and that most women didn’t mind when it was me because I was hot and fit.

After coming out of the convenience store with 2 packs of cigarettes, a bottle of coke and jalapeno chips, an elderly man with zits on his face asked me for some change.

“Holy shit chino. Are you sure?”

“Yeah man all yours.”

“You’re the man. Today’s my lucky day. A free pack of smokes and 400 pesos. You’re an angel.”

The man ran into an alleyway and yelled out in excitement.

“Shut the fuck up dude. You’re way too loud.” Said a man in the distance.

I made my way back to the mansion and saw a Cadillac Escalade parked in the driveway.

“You must be Chino.” Said the man of short stature standing in the living room.

“Chino, this is Juanito.”

He shook my hand with a strong grip. He was wide and obese but you could tell he had a lot of muscle underneath that fat.

“You’re the new boss huh.”

“I guess I am.”

“Do you have some time? We want to show you something.”

We drove for over an hour. We went deep into the hills and mountains. We pulled up to an empty parking lot next to an abandoned warehouse with rusty walls.

“Where were you guys? We’ve been waiting for over an hour.”

“Sorry we got caught up with some business.” Said Leo.

“Who’s this?” Said an Asian looking woman.

“This is Chino.” Said Juanito.

“This is Alvin and that’s chinita.”

“Oh shit bro. I’ve heard so much about you.” Said Alvin.

He wore baggy pants and a baggy hoodie with the Dragon Ball Z logo. He had a skateboard on one hand. She wore a white tennis skirt and a black tank top.

His handshake was limp. She wouldn’t even look at me.

“Does he know yet?” Said Chinita.

“We wanted to wait until everyone was here.”

“What’s going on?”

They all looked at one another.

“We’re going to meet all the cartel leaders of Mexico city and form an alliance with them.” Said Leo.

“What the hell? That sounds like a terrible idea.”

“I think you need to talk to Chino alone.” Said Juanito as the three others stepped outside.

“Why didn’t you tell me about this?”

“We didn’t know if everything was good to go until this morning.”

“What makes you think this is a good idea?”

“We’ve spent months trying to convince the other bosses to let us lead. They know that the cartels in this city are seen as weaker than before but they know this alliance benefits all of us.”

“Most of those people are thugs and criminals.”

“Not anymore. They have new leadership now. People who agree with us and want to do the right thing.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Let us do all the talking. Trust us. We have all our top soldiers in the area waiting to attack if they try anything shady.”

Alvin kept looking at me. Before we got in the car Juanito needed to clean the windows.

“You don’t remember me, do you Chino?” Said Alvin.

“Have we met?”

“I saw you at La Biblioteca Vasconcelos all the time.”

“Wait, I think I remember you now. I’d always see you in the manga section.”

“That’s crazy that you’d remember me man.”

“I was there nearly everyday. I remember the regulars.”

He smiled and blushed.

We drove to Tepito and went inside a 4 story apartment complex which seemed like a ghost town. We went to the fourth floor and entered apartment 4D. A studio apartment with two people sitting by the dining room table next to the stove. There was a woman there who looked to be in their early twenties like me. Beautiful and tanned with voluminous curly hair.

A short middle aged man with a receding hairline and a massive potbelly wearing white wife beater sat next to her.

“Welcome.” Said the woman.

“Valentina, this is Chino. He’s our leader. Chino, this is the angel of death and this man is El Piggy.”

“Jesus christ is he fucking gay or something? He’s so pretty I’d stick my dick in him.”

“El piggy. Still as charming as ever I see.” Said Leo.

“Does he speak or is he just nice to look at?” Said El piggy as he looked me up and down.

My skin crawled after his comments and I couldn’t take my eyes off a brown stain near the stomach area on his white sleeveless shirt.

“He’s not much of a talker but trust me this guy’s legit.”

“I’ll take your word for it Leo. At least he’s nice to look at.” Said Valentina.

The disgusting pig lit a cigarette and blew the smoke in my direction.

“Did you take care of the problem?”

“We took them out Piggy.” Said Juanito.

“Great, let's celebrate.”

He got up to grab something from the kitchen. Leo, Juanito and the angel of death looked at one another. He came back with a bottle of wine and sat down.

The woman next to him pulled out a suppressed glock. I blinked and all I heard was a loud gunshot sound, glass shattering and a thud on the floor. I could barely see anything because things were blurry. Alvin threw up by the living room. Blood on the kitchen floor spread throughout the studio mixed with the wine. The strong grape and alcohol smell made me nauseous. Part of the creepy man’s brains were visible.

I’m in my loft near Polanco next to Valentina. We’re smoking cigarettes and blunts filled with medicinal grade Canadian weed. An ashtray filled with used cigs. A pack of used condoms scattered on the floor and some on the table next to the bed. We started fucking bareback once there wasn’t any protection left and neither of us wanted to leave the apartment. I had four large red candles lit and the place smelled like roses, stale smoke and sweat.

“I can’t believe how much my life’s changed in the last two days.”

“What were you doing before you were a cartel boss?”

“I did odd jobs.”

“Be more specific, mi amor.”

“I was doing fraud. Check and credit card fraud. Sometimes identity theft. I ran a taco truck with a friend of mine in Canada to wash the money.”

“Why Canada?”

“When I was in High School, my parents died and I had to live with my aunt in the capital.”

“What was it like?”

“It was so boring in that city. The food was shit. The people were nice. I liked the weed there.”

“At least the weed was good, I guess.”

“I liked how quiet it was. It’s a nice place to retire.”

“Why did you leave?”

“I missed Mexico City too much. I can’t stay away from this place.”

“I feel the same way. There’s no place like it on the planet.”

“You’ve never even left the country.”

“I went to America once for a few weeks. I lived in Houston with my aunts and uncles as a teenager but they sent me back because they thought I was too much of a thug.”

“What did you do?”

“I got into a lot of fights. Did a lot of drugs. They caught me smoking weed in their garage and told my parents. They had enough and deported my ass.”

“That sounds like something you would do.”

“I went to Canada once too. A place called Toronto.”

“That was 5 hours away from the city I stayed in. I loved that place.”

“The girls there were so pretty. So many different types of people too. The people there talked funny.”

“Canadians just sound goofy.”

I woke up in a tent with empty flaming hot chip bags, Pinguinos wrappers, empty boxes of Ritalin and bottles of water scattered all over the place. A hiking bag by the door and a combat knife by my pillow. Each day felt like a blur.

I checked my emergency phone and saw more new notifications. They used to come daily but they’re not as frequent. I saw Justin calling me and I don’t think I could face him in my current condition. I headed down the river to do yoga then bathed, brushed my teeth and washed my clothes. The water was so clean. Once I got dressed I walked to this rest stop 8 kilometers away where a woman ran a tiny convenience store. Her sister sold tacos, burritos, quesadillas and tamales next door.

My feet were killing me today but if I didn’t walk to this place then I wouldn’t have anything to eat. I didn’t have it in me to hunt or forage for food.

“A bottle of water, some flaming hot chips, some Pinguinos, a cheese quesadilla, some bananas and two bean tacos, isn't that right sir?”

“Am I that predictable?”

“Sometimes you get some Chockis or jalapeno chips.”

“I guess I do order the same thing a lot.”

“Do you not eat meat or something?”

“Not really.”

“You’re always wearing that mask too.”

“There’s a pandemic going on.”

“It’s just a flu.”

“To some people it isn’t.”

“Now the government wants everyone to get the vaccine to control us all. You know they put weird shit in there right like chemicals and computer chips?”

“I don’t know about that.”

“And they want us to inject the virus but we’re supposed to be scared of it too? It doesn’t make any sense.”

She couldn’t take a hint. I wanted to grab my food and leave but she won’t take the money I left on the counter or hand me the stuff.

“It’s been a year already and these people want to shut down the world. How else are we supposed to earn a living?”

“That sucks.”

“They fake the numbers too. I don’t even know anyone who died of covid. They’re probably exaggerated.”

“I lost two of the most important people in my life to this stupid ass virus.”

She looked at me with tears in my eyes.

“I’m so sorry sir.”

Instead of eating the tacos and quesadillas there and trying to make small talk with the owner, I ate them on my way back.

I laid down on my back while in my tent.

“You’re already enlightened man. Everyone is. Once you figure that out and truly believe it you’ll see a burst of light and energy come over you.” Said Justin Santos as we were smoking weed in his apartment 4 years ago.

I can’t let go of the people I’ve lost or all the abuses I’ve endured. Now this pandemic forced me to live in a tent in the forest far away from civilization.

It was time for my daily second yoga session by the river. I saw a snake coiled up by the spot I typically do my Kriyas. As I was doing a downward dog, I noticed my reptile friend uncoiled and a strange sensation arose in my spine that I couldn’t describe using words. My body heated up like I had the worst fever of my life. I hope I didn’t catch covid somehow despite being secluded for the last couple of months.

The snake made its way towards me and I noticed the urge to be scared and run away but I didn’t feel the need to act on it. I could feel that the serpent didn’t feel any fear towards me. It wrapped around my legs then made its way up my body from my spine all the way to the crown of my head. I could feel its curiosity. My entire body tingled. My body convulsed as I collapsed on the ground. The snake slithered away into the forest. I felt all the emotional baggage, grief and trauma escape my body. I looked at the sun and felt the sunlight energizing my body. I couldn’t see anything but a bright light for what felt like an eternity. I felt so warm and safe. Like I’d seen every possibility of every outcome imaginable and felt at peace with everything.

At the food truck I saw Justin and his employees handing out tacos to homeless people like he always does on Sundays.

“Chino, is that you? What the hell happened to you dawg? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for so long. No offense but you look like shit. You’re all skinny. Are you off cycle or something?” Said Justin with his eyes bloodshot.

“I need your help.”

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saldana98 · 9 months

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January 9th 2024

I swear the most inconvenient shit be happening to me.lol but I guess that’s my fault, I’ve been wrong too many times to be trusted at this point. But the proof is there, what else is there to try and defend. My word is nothing and hers is all mighty. No matter how this is looked at there’s no way she’s trusting me.

With this, she gets to prove her point that I always fuck her over at least once a year.

I hope this is a test. I hope that I can overcome whatever it is being thrown my way, because my happiness only shows suspicions

Rejects a girl in front of wife, looks through phone

Loves wife unconditionally, looks through social media

Just a normal day, gets deja vu, automatically assumes I did something

Has bad dreams about me being a piece of shit, holy shit look ! Looks like she’s been right this whole time about everything.

I know I’m not the best guy out there, I have flaws but trust goes a long way. I’m not expecting for her to roll out the red carpet. But I just seems I can’t do something right without something being wrong. Like if the love I give out comes with a price.

I just can’t do it anymore.

I’ve been so happy these few days. I get motivation to go to the gym, I got to excited that we could have a baby, that there’s a possibility that I could be in a good position to have a good job ! & it just seems like it’s not in the books.

But still I pray. I pray that at the end of the day, I can get some sort of recognition, that one day some says good job or I’m proud of you, without having to feel like they’re forced to say it.

It sucks being a guy sometimes lol

I guess it’s time to just suppress my feelings. Feel proud of myself and everything I do not expect to make anyone proud l. To do things for myself, because at this point in time, no one’s going to save me. Not anymore..

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dilf-whore · 2 years

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my kind of girl (part 1)

pairing: billy hargrove x f!reader

genre: friends to lovers! , a little fluff (?), i’m not sure really, some mentions of bullying

summary: you grow closer and closer with the redhead you tutor... and maybe with her stepbrother too

A/N: i’m back! i’m sorry i was gone for so long so many shit has happen and i lost motivation to do stuff. i hope you guys like this series, i’ll be posting the next part soon. please do let me know if you want to be tagged to the next parts! 𓆩♡𓆪. send in you requests as well! also this is not proofread.

requested: no

requests are OPEN

masterlist

・°☆

“Hi! Y/N Y/L/N? is that right?” a redhead girl approached you, hugging her skateboard. You assume she’s a middle-schooler, seeing her wary eyes as she enter the high school campus. You nod.

She sighs in relief, her body relaxing a little. “I heard that you do tutoring? Are you still available to tutor another student?” she asks.

“Actually, I’m not teaching anyone as of the moment so I have all the time after school to tutor” You say.

“Oh that’s great! I’m Maxine Mayfield by the way, but please call me Max. Will you be free today after school? So you can coordinate with my parents? and hopefully start today” Max rambles, fidgeting the hem of her jacket.

“Sure!” you smile.

She pulls a crumpled piece of paper and a pen in the pocket of her bag. She lifts her knee and put his skateboard on top, writing her details.

Handing out the crumpled paper to you, “4819 Cherry Lane, I’ll see you at 6. You can eat dinner there”.

"Alright see you!” you say as your wave each other goodbye.

・°☆

You turn your car at the house with the number 4819, and see a blue camaro in front looks familiar you thought. You park beside the shiny car and made your way to the front door.

Dusting off your pants and making small fixes on your shirt. But before you could even knock on the door, a tall blonde man barged outside the door, startling you. You watched him approach his car in disbelief, didn’t even bother to apologize or even look at you.

As he opened the driver’s seat, you took a good look at him. It’s Billy Hargrove

“Hi! You must be Y/N? I’m Neil and sorry about my son. You know, just a little misunderstanding” A man, wearing glasses interrupted your thoughts.

“Oh y-yes that’s right” you reply.

“Please come in”

He leads you to the dining table, and there you see a woman, who looks like Max. And of course, Max who’s smiling excitedly at you. “Hi!” she waves at you.

You sat down beside Max, handing out to you the roasted chicken.

“So how much do you charge and what do you teach?” The woman asked.

“I charge $3 per hour, and I usually teach middle-schoolers and sometimes those in pre-school and elementary. I teach all subjects most of the time” you say.

“Wow that’s really impressive. We’re also good with your price, can you start today?” Neil asked.

“Yup!” you reply.

・°☆

Max brings you to her room and grabbed a spare chair for you.

“So you and Billy are siblings?” you wondered.

“Uhm no, he’s my stepbrother and an asshole” she replied, emphasizing the word stepbrother.

You nod as you take a seat beside her.

“Before we start, is it okay if they pay you like every end of the week? my mom and stepdad are usually gone, so yeah” Max asks as she look through notebook.

“Sure no problem” you reply.

・°☆

An hour and a half has passed, and you see 8:03 on the clock. You look at Max who just finished the activity you gave her on Physics. She gives you her paper, a little scared.

Giving a small pat on her shoulder you reassure, “don’t be nervous Max, you can do it. Besides I’m here to teach and guide you every step of the way”

After checking her work, you gave her a wide smile and a thumbs up.

“Good job! you only made three mistakes but that’s a huge improvement. I’m so proud of you” you cheer.

Max sits up straight, energy filling her body. She claps her hands excitedly like a little kid, “Oh my god! I did it! Thank you Y/N, you’re so smart”

“I told you you can do it! and there you have it the end of our first session! So, I’ll see you tomorrow? same time?” you ask.

“Yup, see you!” she reply.

You stand up and help Max tidy up her table. Piling up pieces of paper, picking up books and putting them inside the girl’s bag. You hear a loud roar of a car outside which startled the both of you.

“He’s back” Max says, rolling her eyes.

・°☆

You both go outside the room, and hear soft giggles. You and Max go further and see Billy with Carol, arm around her waist, entering the household.

You made eye contact with Carol who’s looking you up and down with disgust. i want to gauge this bitch’s eye out you thought. God how much you loathe Carol, boosting her self-esteem by making fun of other people, judging them as if she’s perfect. You were never really made fun or judged by her, (not until now) but you are aware of how poorly she treats other students in school.

“Who are you?” Billy asks annoyed.

“She’s Y/N, my tutor. And if you don’t mind, get out of the fucking way” Max replies, motioning the pair to move aside.

She grabs you by the shoulder and quickly bring you to your car. And you swear you felt eyes staring at you from behind as you go out.

Billy watches as the girls left the house, checking you out of course.

she’s pretty

“I’m so sorry about him, I assure you he won’t be around during our tutoring sessions”

“It’s okay Max, no need to apologize” you reassure.

You step in your car and bid your goodbyes.

Well that was something

・°☆

#stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfic #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove headcannons #stranger things headcannons #dacre montgomery

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skamenglishsubs · 3 years

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Subtext and Culture, Young Royals, Season 1, Episode 2

Episode 2 picks up the morning day after the initiation party, the girls are having breakfast lunch at their dorm, the boys at theirs, and everyone wants the juicy details about what happened at the party...

Culture: Tell me more, tell me more, did you get very far? Although, it's pretty funny how the roles are reversed, Maddie is all "meh" about it, while Nils tells a different story. Then again, since when do you get together after a blowjob?

Culture: I actually have no idea why Simon is having breakfast at Skogsbacken, since regular schools only cover lunch for students, everyone eats breakfast at home, and then goes to school. Then again, it allows a scene where (Never mind, they're having lunch, thanks @kamand !) Blink and you miss it: Wilhelm casts some nervous glances at Simon after having been called out for disappearing at the party and almost forced to confess to making out with someone.

Culture: I know Felice is trying to put August down, but don't knock a proper Swedish pizza! As much as I like living in the US, they can't fucking make pizzas here, and the first thing I eat every time I go back to Sweden is always a real pizza. With pineapple and shrimp as God intended pizza to be made!

Culture: August is namedropping ski resorts in the Alps, which is where you go skiing in Europe if you have money, although Saint-Martin-de-Belleville is actually near Val Thorens in France, while Verbier is in Switzerland. It does have a three-star restaurant, though. Sweden and Norway have a couple of decent ski resorts, but the Scandinavian mountain chain is simply not as impressive as the Alps.

Subtext: Remember Wilhelm getting up and hurrying to math class in the beginning of the scene? It was so he could grab the other seat next to Simon, because he knows Simon is gonna sit next to Sara, since no-one else does.

Culture: Formally greeting your teacher before class is very uncommon in Sweden, but since Hillerska is all about discipline and tradition, of course they do it. Note that they're again using the formal Swedish title for male teachers, Magister, which in a regular school would be kind of a joke, since teachers and students are on a first-name basis with each other.

Subtext: Wilhelm is exposing how the world works if you have money. At Simon's old school, studying alone would result in good grades, but Hillerska is slightly corrupt and almost expects the students to essentially pay for getting a good grade.

Subtext: Simon is lying to his teacher, he absolutely hasn't talked to his parents about paying for private lessons.

Subtext: No, Sara absolutely does care about what other people think about her, and when she directly tells Felice that she would actually like some friends, that's when Felice gets it and starts making an effort to become real friends with her.

Culture: They're all bilingual at Simon's home, they're all speaking Spanish and Swedish, although Linda has a very noticeable accent to her Swedish. Based on demographics and statistics, the most likely scenario is that Linda immigrated to Sweden from Chile, met Micke, and started a family. In real life, Omar Rudberg was born in Venezuela and grew up in Sweden, while Carmen Gloria Pérez was born in New York, and grew up in Puerto Rico.

Subtext: Remember how I talked in the intro post about how distant social classes know nothing of each other? Ayub and Rosh are either working class or lower middle class like Simon, and since rowing is a typical upper class sport, they know nothing of it, they don't even think of it as a real sport. Unlike football, which is a proper working class sport, they know all about that!

Subtext: Scandinavia has Jantelagen, and everyone there thinks it's uniquely Scandinavian, but all countries have some form of Tall Poppy Syndrome. In this scene, Simon is starting to make a class journey, he started rowing, he started trying to fit in with the other upper-class kids, and getting into a relationship with someone as upper-class as Wilhelm would definitely move him all the way. But going on a journey means leaving things behind, which is why Rosh and Ayub are cutting him down and literally turning their backs on him. They like it in the small town of Bjärstad, why can't he be happy there too? Why is he betraying his roots?

Subtext: This comment from August nicely foreshadows a later episode when August does something traceable on a School computer...

Subtext: What August means is that he's not sure Wilhelm has the same desire to be accultured into the upper class, to play the part of a proper prince, in the same way that he and Erik have accepted their roles and are even enjoying them.

Culture: Although it's impossible to read the name of the medicine, the paper tag on the bottle indicates that it's some kind of prescription medicine. From the conversation with Vincent, we learn that it's some kind of ADHD medication, probably some kind of Dextroamphetamine since those improve athletic ability and cognitive functions in healthy people.

Culture: Birkenstock sandals are associated with hippies in Sweden as well as in many parts of the world, so August is actually saying that the school counselor isn't really part of the same upper-class society as the rest of the staff. And again, his use of the word sosse drives the point home.

Subtext: Consequently, the counselor sees right through August and refuses to immediately prescribe him the medication that he wants...

Subtext: ...even though August tries to both bribe him and threaten him into giving him the medication he wants.

Subtext: A big theme of this episode is class journeys, and in this scene and a previous exercise scene, August gushes about how good a thing that is, how proud he is of Simon for going on one, and spouts some crap about how everyone can make it if they really want to.

Subtext: Thankfully, Madison says what we're all thinking: August is full of shit, life isn't fair, and they're only at the school because they were born into privilege.

Blink and you miss it: After Wilhelm has nervously texted his crush for the first time, he starts to bite his fingernails, but quickly stops himself, because why would he be nervous? He's just texting another boy about rowing practice, there's nothing more to it!

Subtext: Simon's texting game is on point though, he knows exactly what he should write to get Wilhelm to go on a totally-not-a-date with him.

Subtext: In the same way that August couldn't convince the counselor about being sick, I don't think Wilhelm's atrocious acting here convinces August that he's sick either.

Culture: Public transport in the greater Stockholm area - or wherever we're supposed to be - is of course cash-less, and you pay by either charging a special card, or by signing up in their app and buying tickets through there. The point of this scene though is to drive home how Wilhelm has never ever had to take the bus before in his life, and therefore has no idea how it works.

Culture: The totally-not-a-date starts at a Circle K, which in Sweden is just another gas station, but it is actually a Canadian multi-national convenience store corporation. The price of gas is of course posted in kr/l, and 13.98kr/l corresponds to roughly $6/gal.

Subtext: Throughout the totally-not-a-date, Wilhelm is trying to reach for common ground with Simon, trying to show him how he's just a regular guy...

Subtext: ...but then real life intrudes, Wilhelm is recognized by some local girls, who call out to him and run away giggling, which shows how he's not a regular guy, he's going to get recognized wherever he goes.

Culture: Kokt eller grillat, boiled or grilled, are the two ways you can get your hot-dog at pretty much any hot-dog place in Sweden, and ketchup and mustard is always offered. The correct answer to this question is of course grilled, with ketchup and mustard, and this just shows that Wilhelm is a man of culture and good taste. Unfortunately, they were out grilled ones, so they all got boring soggy boiled hot-dogs instead. Is there a metaphor here? I don't know.

Subtext: Again, the show drives home the point that absolutely no-one has a problem with people being gay. Simon is clearly out to Ayub and the rest of his friends, and Ayub immediately picks up on the fact that this is totally a date.

Blink and you miss it: Ayub nudges Simon with his elbow to tell him that he should make a move on Wilhelm.

Culture: What we're looking at is just the local junior/high school football team, Bjärstad, playing a match against some other unnamed junior football team. Since the stakes are super low, the audience basically consists of whichever parents and friends of the players that could be bothered showing up.

Culture: Driving age is 18 in Sweden, and even then getting your own car at that age is extremely uncommon. However, you can easily get a license for a moped when you turn 15, so these are the vehicles of choice for teenagers to get around.

Subtext: August found out about Wilhelm's trip to town, but his main problem with it is that he wants Wilhelm to stop slumming it with lower class people, and to start hanging out with everyone at school instead, so that he can be properly accultured into the upper class. Again, sosse in this context means working class, not socialist.

Subtext: Although Simon felt really great about his first date with Wilhelm, the text message reminds him that Wilhelm isn't a regular person, and that even this innocent little trip generates interest and scrutiny, and can't be posted publicly.

Culture: As everyone should have noticed by now, Madison keeps speaking English, while everyone speaks to her in Swedish, so clearly she understands it. But here she gives her motivation for sticking to English, and that is that she doesn't feel she's good enough at speaking Swedish. Boarding schools like Hillerska attracts international students that have some kind of connection to the country, so a likely scenario is that Madison grew up in the US with a Swedish parent, and she's being sent here to experience Swedish culture and get immersed in the language to learn it better.

Cinematography: This shot of August drives really home all the pressure he is under, he's out of drugs, the headmistress just hinted that he's out of money, and he's literally being weighed down by books and work-out weights.

Subtext: Simon has kept his visits to Micke a secret from Sara, so here he has to intervene to make sure August doesn't accidentally reveal this to her. He also wants to protect his sister, so he's redirecting August's search for drugs onto himself.

Subtext: And on the flipside, Simon isn't really telling his dad that Sara still hates him and really doesn't want to see him, so he's vague when Micke asks about Sara and Linda.

Culture: Finally a bottle of medicine where we can read the label! Unfortunately for Simon, this is Tramadol, an opiate prescribed for pain relief, which is the complete opposite of the kind of drugs August wants.

Subtext: If you haven't figured out yet that this episode is about class journeys, August spells it out for us here. However, the reason he's "congratulating" Simon in front of everybody is because Simon just supplied him with more drugs, so this is his way of thanking him, since he can't really pay him.

Blink and you miss it: For a split second, Wilhelm grabs Simon's leg during the scary scene.

Subtext: The entire dialogue of the movie works as subtext for what's actually going on between Wilhelm and Simon at this point, and Wilhelm is getting a little freaked out by this sneaky display of affection.

Subtext: The movie also puts words on the implications of Wilhelm getting together with a boy, what about having kids in the future? Can you carry on your family name and traditions, or will they die with you?

Lost in translation: The plaque actually says "FEEL YOUR RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE HERITAGE". Even though the plaque means the heritage and legacy of the school itself, Wilhelm is thinking about his legacy, his heritage, and how getting together with Simon would threaten that.

Lost in translation: Wilhelm actually says "jag är inte en..." - "I'm not a..." before he stops himself. So it's not possible that he was trying to say "I'm not gay", because that doesn't work grammatically in Swedish either. He could be trying to say "I'm not a guy like that" or "I'm not a guy who likes guys", that would work.

Cinematography: The framing and silhouetting of this shot is just chef's kiss. The outline of their hair allows us to see who is who, and we can see from their poses that Simon is welcoming a kiss, while Wilhelm is still hesitating.

#young royals #young royals subtext #young royals analysis

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the-ferocious-kittyrose · 3 years

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Rewriting Haggar/Honerva’s redemption arc

One of the many things that bothered me about VLD S8 is Honerva’s redemption arc. While I was never fully against the idea of Honerva getting a redemption arc, I just didn’t want VLD to do it because I knew that they would fuck it up if they tried. And low and behold, I was right!

But yeah, I wasn’t against the idea of her being redeemed. And I don’t mean “redeemed” as in “all is forgiven and she’s just a good guy now,” but more like a Darth Vader, “the things she did were inexcusable and she would never be able to right all her wrongs but she goes out on one good act to show that there was still good in her deep down and she at least had the potential to change.”

I know a lot of people don’t like the whole, “redemption=death” thing, which I understand, but I personally never had a problem with it.

Ok, so why didn’t Honerva’s redemption work? Well there are a few reasons but the one that baffles me the most is that, instead of trying to make her more sympathetic, season 8 seemed to go out of its way to show her being more evil and vile than ever.

And because I have nothing better to do, I’m gonna go through Honerva’s story in VLD and explain what I would change to make her redemption more believable.

(Keep in mind I am not a writer, this is just me ranting about my favorite character and how I personally would’ve written her.)

1. Realizing she’s Altean

I always thought it’s was weird that when Allura said “you’re...Altean!?” In the S2 finale, Haggar didn’t seem to react at all, she just kept attacking. It’s as if she didn’t care or already knew, which doesn’t make sense considering in the S3 finale and S8E2 it’s established that Haggar has no memory of who she was before she died. And in S4E3 she seems shocked by her Altean face (which also doesn’t make sense because her blue skin isn’t camouflage that’s just how she looks after the rift) so it seems like she didn’t know.

Wouldn’t it have made more sence if after Allura said “you’re...Altean!?” Honerva looked confused/shocked? If she became defensive and said Allura was lying/trying to insult her? There’s def anti-Altean propaganda in the empire so it would be considered an insult.

After that she starts questioning Zarkon. And when she looks into his mind, it’s out of genuine curiosity and desire to know the truth, not because, “the empire needs him” or whatever that meant.

And isn’t it a bit odd that she doesn’t seem betrayed at all when she finds out Zarkon has been keeping all this from her? She’s just like, “oh, you’re my husband? Cool.” Wtf???

2. Her past relationship with Zarkon

Okay, I love Zonerva, but if we’re being honest, Zarkon was not the best husband. He enabled the shit out of Honerva, even when it was obvious that the rift was doing serious damage to her physical and mental health. To me, it seems like Zarkon was so blinded by the power the rift gave him that he didn’t realize/ignored the negative effect it was having on Honerva. In the same way he downplayed the negative impact the rift had on the planet.

I think that should’ve been explored more. Maybe Honerva notices that she’s been acting differently and is worried somethings wrong (think S5 Kuron). And Honerva tries to tell Zarkon that she feels strange and Zarkon just brushes it off.

And later, when Alfor visits Diaibazaal years later. Things are pretty much the same except when we sees Honerva, she is very obviously pregnant and Alfor’s there when Honerva falls and goes into labor (instead of a random quintessence seizure). Alfor and many Galran doctors try their best to save her and the baby but she dies in childbirth.

Zarkon goes ballistic. He’s yelling, throwing doctors across the room, and Alfor turns to the doctor holding Lotor and tells them to get the baby to safely, fearing Zarkon will take his grief out on the baby.

Zarkon turns on Alfor, blaming him for Honerva’s death and accusing him of letting her die so that he could get his way and close the rift. He lunges Alfor and roars at him to leave.

He spends the rest of the night grieving at Honerva’s bedside, when Kova jumps on the bed and starts gnawing on her finger trying to wake her up. This is what gives him the idea to bring her back with quintessence.

3. Her current relationship with Zarkon

I think it’s pretty safe to say that they’re relationship didn’t get better after the war began. Zarkon hid her identity and her child from her for 10,000 years and essentially used her as a tool of war. It’s pretty fucked up.

I know it’s pretty well established that Zarkon treats Haggar with more respect than his other underlings, but I feel like it would be interesting to see that change overtime. We see that after Voltron comes back, Zarkon becomes very obsessed with Voltron/Black, and he and Haggar start disagreeing more and more.

Remember the moment where one of Haggar’s druids told Zarkon Haggar said he needed to rest and Zarkon hit them with his bayard and told them, “remember who your master is”? What if, instead of a random druid, it was Haggar who he hit?

I feel like that would be a good way to show Haggar and the audience just how much Zarkon’s obsession with Voltron is affecting him, and make the audience feel a tiny bit bad for her.

Then later in season 4, when Zarkon wakes up from his coma and finds out Haggar brought Lotor back to take his place he gets pissed. He puts a price on Lotor’s head and has Haggar arrested for treason. She steals a ship, escapes, and later on meets up with Lotor’s generals.

Her and Zarkon are officially broken up and her quest to reclaim her identity and get her son back begins.

4. Oriande

I never liked the concept of chosen/sacred Alteans. The idea that some Alteans are just born more powerful than others just feels iffy. My idea of Oriande is that it’s an Altean holly land, any Altean can enter it just depends on whether or not you can pass the White Lion’s trial. Passing the trial proves that your intentions are pure and and the White Lion will bless you with power.

I didn’t like how Honerva seemed to force her way into Oriande, I think it would be more effective if she had gone through normally because, at this point, her intentions were pure. She was going there to purge herself of the dark magic corrupting her and reclaim her memories so she could go get her son back.

I also like the idea that Oriande is a sorta link to the Altean after life, and you can speak with people you’ve lost. Allura gets to speak with Alfor, and Honerva speaks with her mother.

You could also have her be confronted by the spirits of the Alteans she helped destroy. Have the weight of her past actions bear down on her. An important part of any redemption arc is acknowledging the terrible shit you’ve done in the past, and that was severely lacking in Honerva’s arc.

Another interesting thing you could do is have Honerva talk to her younger self. The one that died 10,000 years ago. This kinda thing actually happened in 80s Voltron, young Haggar appearing in Haggar’s head trying to convince her to be good again.

5. Her relationship with Lotor

Now this is where the redemption arc really falls apart. I forget who, but one of the writers said after S5 that Haggar/Honerva was motivated purely by love for her son, but man did they do a bad job of showing that.

And it would’ve been so easy to fix that problem, just have her not be horrible to him. Have them have actual civil conversations, have her protect and defend him. Don’t have her reject him as a fucking baby!

Imagine if, after Zarkon destroys Lotor’s planet, instead of immediately deciding to

exile him, Zarkon says that this is the final straw and he’s going to have Lotor executed. But Haggar speaks up to defend Him. There’s actually a scene in DOTU where Zarkon tries to kill Lotor and Haggar gets on her knees and begs for him to be spared. (Though the scene was mostly played for laughs.)

she asks for mercy and justifies it by saying it would be unwise to kill his only heir. It’s a weak argument, Lotor’s a half breed and couldn’t realistically take the throne, but Zarkon does concede, he still loves her after all, and has Lotor exiled.

And Haggar isn’t spying on him because she doesn’t trust him, but because she’s concerned for him. When Lotor confronts Haggar about sending her cronies after him, she says she knows he’s hiding something. Lotor asks if she’s threatening him, thinking she’s going to rat him out, but she says no, she’s not threatening him, she’s just trying to warn him against doing anything stupid because, with Zarkon seemingly on his death bed, the empire needs Lotor’s leadership.

At this point in the story, Haggar is questioning her loyalty to Zarkon, so I feel like it would make sense for her to be silently supporting Lotor from the shadows.

Then at the Kral Zera in season 5, It was weird to me how she was helping Lotor through Kuron while also telling him he couldn’t be emperor and trying to put Sendak on the throne. I feel like it would’ve made more sense for Sendak to just show up on his own without Haggar.

Haggar wouldn’t even be at the Kral Zera, she would just watch through Kuron.

And then we get to S6 when she actually reveals to Lotor that she’s his mom. This scene was just so poorly done. She never actually apologizes to him, she’s just like “yeah I forgot you were my kid and I never loved you, but were cool now right?” I remember when I saw S8E2 and it shows her after Lotor rejects her and she looks like she’s about to cry, I was just thinking, “this would be very emotional and sad IF she had actually apologized and made it clear that she genuinely loved him.” But she didn’t and I don’t know why!

And then we get to season 8, and of course everything in S8 is bad but Honerva’s story is particularly bad. She’s supposed to be motivated by love for Lotor yet she doesn’t act like she actually cares about him at all.

She manipulates his corpse and when she sees his gross melted body, she doesn’t even react that much. When a mother sees her child’s mutilated corpse, how do you think she reacts? Screaming? Crying?? Hurling??? But no. She’s just like, “...”

And then when she goes to the alternate reality and meets baby Lotor and he rejects her, her reaction isn’t disappointment or sadness, it’s anger and entitlement. She immediately decides, “ok, fuck this kid. Let’s destroy this reality.”

It just doesn’t make sense! This is the season you’re trying to REDEEM her! Why are you going out of your way to make her so vile?

6. Her S7-S8 plan

(Keep in mind I haven’t watched S7/S8 since they came out and barely even watched S8 to begin with, so I don’t remember some things and I can’t be bothered to rewatch them.)

Okay, starting with S7, she’s not in this season at all but in “The Ruins” the druid dude says that her final order was to hunt and destroy the Blade of Marmora. I guess it makes a certain amount of sense because she saw that it was Keith who brought Lotor’s actions to light, but that whole plot was really pointless in my opinion. (Was anybody really hoping for a rematch between Keith and that one random druid?)

If you want us to forgive Honerva for her crimes, you really shouldn’t keep adding more unnecessary crimes. It’s established that there were a lot of Galra war lords vying for power and pirates looking for money, just have it be that Kolivan got kidnapped by one of them.

Then you have her season 8 plan and I’m gonna be real with y’all, I have no idea how to fix this mess.

I feel like the basics of her plan could work. She tries to get Lotor and Sincline out of the rift but when she gets him he’s a melted corpse so the plan then becomes to use sincline to go to another reality to find a living Lotor, but opening all these rifts causes problems and the paladins have to stop her.

But all the shit with manipulating the colony Alteans, killing the White Lion, desecrating Oriande, and destroying Olkarion and entire realities, it was all so unnecessary.

Personally I would cut the colony Alteans from the story all together, there are other ways for Lotor to betray the team. It was a lazy way of making Lotor 100% evil and having Honerva manipulate them is unnecessarily cruel, especially in the season you’re trying to redeem her.

Here’s a very basic outline of how I would do this plot.

If we’re going by season 8’s logic that she needs a sacrifice to bring back Sincline, I would’ve had the Galra she killed at the Kral Zera be the sacrifice, not the White Lion. She stands on the pyramid and talks about how the empire stole her life from her and she wants revenge as she absorbs their quintessence into herself and then uses that to bring back Sincline.

Then when she finds Lotor dead she takes Sincline and uses it to go to another reality where she can be with her family.

The danger comes when she opens rifts to the other realities and rift creatures start coming out and causing damage. The paladins fight them and follow her into the rift to stop whatever evil plan she may have. Because the paladins don’t know that Haggar is now Honerva and all this is just to get Lotor back. They think this is all some plan for multiverse domination or some shit.

Meanwhile Honerva has just been rejected by little Lotor and seeing Voltron show up pushes her over the edge and they fight.

But when they find out the real reason she’s doing all this they start trying to appeal to her and convince her to give up and close the rift peacefully. And similarly to how the paladins had to sacrifice the castle to close the rifts created by the fight with Lotor, Honerva has to sacrifice herself to close the rifts.

In the end, I feel like a Honerva redemption arc could’ve worked if the writers were actually competent and actually made an effort to have her be sympathetic, but In canon, her reasoning, “If I can’t indulge in the simple joys of life, why should anybody else?” just doesn’t cut it.

It’s disappointing. VLD had so much potential. I’m thinking of just rewriting the entire series from the beginning. Hopefully putting all my thoughts out into the universe will help me move on.

#voltron #voltron legendary discourse #haggar #honerva #Lotor #prince lotor #Allura #princess allura #vld #vld critical #Altean #voltron season 8 #zarkon #emperor Zarkon #zonerva #Galra #redemption arc

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oliverthesquid · 3 years

Text

Detective Terukane AU idea??

Okay so I was having Terukane brainrot and i came up with this whole AU about them that I reallllyyyy wanna write a fanfic but i have no idea how to start or if people would even like it so I decided to post about it on here in hopes to get some responses/support as well as some help if possible! What I have written below is my ideas so far. They’re a bit messy , not really organized, and i say maybe a lot because I’m not sure if they’re even good ideas but please take a look if you’re interested!

on a unrelated but related note, if you’re interested in this AU and would like to see me write about it please tell me/talk to me so I can have some sort of motivation to make this happen! Also If you have ideas/suggestions/critiques please tell me as well because I’m kind of a beginner when it comes to writing and suggestions could mean a lot! I need all the help I can get!!

Now onto the actual AU

Basics:

Basically Akane is a thief or some sort of criminal and Teru is the top detective in the department and catches him. However, he needs his help to get to the bottom of a case that theyre working on and getting help from an inside source such as akane could help drastically. Somehow(idk how yet) teru manages to get akane to agree to help him

possible moments/ideas for this??:

akane gets shot while they’re chasing a criminal to get to the bottom of the case and Teru lets the criminal escape so he can help Akane (and obviously he gets all confused about it because he just let a criminal go to save another criminal somebody that he should hate)

Its nighttime and they go outside. Akane decides to show Teru his favorite spots hang out which are specifically the rooftops where they can look down at the city below. They admire the scenery together and maybe they have to walk across a tightrope to get to certain spots and teru is maybe a little scared (but he wont admit it). However, akane holds him steady and helps him across (sort of like in the book rooftoppers??)

Guys what if,,, they kiss on the rooftops in the moonlight that would be really cool i think

Both of them are pining but are in denial

A lot of them just bugging each-other and its really cute

Instead of the school mysteries theyre all sort of criminals and they each have like a specialty according to what their rumor was/is

Instead of “president minamoto/teru” its detective minamoto/teru

Maybe the have to go to a bar for some reason and somebody slips something into akane’s drink without him noticing. Teru obviously has to help him and get him out of there

Akane hangs on top of the rooftops a lot especially when hes sad or thinking

Teru getting scared of getting attached to people

something to do with Akane’s childhood and why he joined the clockeepers. Possible idea for why he joined them is that maybe he was an orphan as a kid and they somehow tricked him into joining them? (like in the manga) but despite that hes still with them after many years and they’re all pretty close friends

Relating to the orphan akane idea; maybe as a child akane got to know and be friends with aoi (female) and started developing a crush on her. However, after he joined the clock keepers he started to see and talk to her less and less. He still has feelings for her (not for long 👀) but has never told her how he feels. Since hes a criminal now he cant bear to face her like that so he just watches and admires her from afar.

One day teru and akane are out doing work on the case or whatever and akane spots aoi at a cafe. He sort of grabs teru and sits him down at a table nearby so he can observe aoi. (Basically she’s out with one of her male friends and later the guy confesses to aoi but she rejects him) Teru asks him whats going on and Akane tells him about her and his feelings for her. However he admits that she’ll probably never like him but he’s just watching her from afar (that one line akane says about aoi before he saves her and reveals himself as the clock keeper in the manga) Teru starts to feel jealous but he doesn’t know why. Why should he feel jealous? It’s not like he likes Akane... Oh shit.

maybe the criminal theyre trying to catch is Hanako?? (since in the manga is the leader of the seven mysteries so here he would also be like the leader) and also!! If the criminal they’re trying to catch is Hanako: Teru is trying to catch Hanako because his boss told him to. However, it turns out that his boss is Tsukasa (but he doesnt know this) and Tsukasa is trying to get reuinted with Hanako (same sort of relationship as in the manga) through the means of catching him with the police. Possibly Akane discovers this and tell Teru. Teru struggles about what he should do and Akane helps him through)

Instead of the school mysteries theyre all sort of criminals and they each have like a specialty according to what their rumor was/is

(idea) the 4 pm bookstack are instead a base where tsuchusgusmori has information on basically everyone and everything. For the right price, he’ll give anyone that information

(idea) the clock keepers are instead a little band of thiefs who live on top of a huge clock tower (or something and thats why theyre known as the clock keepers) obviously, akane is a part of that band

(Yako/ misaki stairs idea ) maybe way too dark for the story but yako runs a tiny little doll shop in the city but underground, its access into any area and any exclusive event possible (because her boundary is space). She can get you into practically everything including private rooms with security ect. however she won’t get you out, you have to figure out how to get back on your own. And the price to get into one of these places is a human body part. The harder it is to get into the higher the price is. (so like low class events would be like a finger, blood, ect. And super high class events would be like an arm, a head, eyes) shes gathering bodyparts to possible revive/recreate her dead lover (miskai)

#terukane #teru x akane #jibaku shoujo hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #aoi akane #akane aoi #teru minamoto #tbhk #tbhk fanfic

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prurientpuddlejumper · 3 years

Text

Cozy Sweaters

Jackson Neill x Reader

Sequel to Cold Hands, requested by @detectivebarba & written for @storiesofsvu’s Fall Bingo!

Warnings: Angst. Angst. Angst. Fluff?

Summary: Oh my god they were roommates.

3,350 words

September 8th

The living room of your apartment—what used to be your apartment—was abuzz with heated voices.

“We’re sorry, but you said you were moving out!”

“So you just gave away my room?! I’m allowed to change my mind!”

Your roommates glanced between each other, awkwardness thick in the air.

“Ed is moving here all the way from England on the promise that he would have a room. He already bought his plane ticket. We’d really be screwing him over.”

“But… where am I supposed to go?”

Jenny sighed and shook her head. “Listen, if this wasn’t so last-minute, I’d understand, but you were supposed to move in with your boyfriend next week. We already made plans to fill your spot…” She really was sorry, in other words, but you were stuck.

“Can’t you still move in with him?” Todd added, and Jenny shot daggers from her eyes.

“He cheated on me!”

“Yeah, but you said he didn’t want to break up, right? Just work things out.”

“I am not,” you hissed through gritted teeth, “ever taking him back after what he did.”

September 13th

Every one-bedroom apartment listing in the greater NYC area was out of your price range. You tapped your friend group, colleagues, and acquaintances for roommates and came back empty. You went on Craig’s List and met with a few strangers seeking roommates. The ones who weren’t terrifying never called you back.

Meanwhile, Jackson Neill had been blowing up your phone.

Well, not blowing up—the first night he got drunk and filled your inbox begging you to come back, sobbing and slurring into your voicemail, spamming indecipherable text messages. The next morning, a single text read: “I’m sorry. That was inappropriate, and it won’t happen again.”

And it didn’t.

But he sent another message a few days later telling you he’d found some more of your stuff, if you’d like it back. That you were always welcome to talk if you wanted to. He wanted to be there for you. You didn’t message him back.

September 14th

It was a cold, rainy day on campus, so you risked taking a shortcut to the dining hall. You turned the corner of an old brick building, and there he was, walking out of the Department of Religious Studies, jacket collar pulled up over his neck because the forgetful fool could never remember his umbrella.

He froze at the same time you did.

All you could hear was your pulse drumming inside your skull like rain. You knew you’d run into him eventually, but you hadn’t decided how to react, and your body wasn’t offering any suggestions.

He gave you a pitiful smile and lifted his hand. “Hi.”

“Hey.”

One leaden foot shuffled in front of the other, and you kept walking. He nodded with a wan smile and sad eyes and didn’t chase you.

The outdoor seating was closed because of the weather, so the dining hall was crowded and buzzing. You snatched a small two-seat table just as another student left, brushing a stale French fry off it onto the floor. Sinking down to enjoy your cheap sandwich, you glanced around the crowd.

A middle-aged man with a soggy jacket and salt-and-pepper hair, who had no right to be so breathtakingly handsome, was searching desperately for a seat while precariously balancing a tray of soup and coffee.

He felt your gaze on him, and you were fixed with a beam of frozen green eyes.

You waved him over.

“I wasn’t following you, I swear.”

“I don’t know, eating lunch? At lunchtime? That can’t be a coincidence.”

The corner of his lip wanted to smile, but he didn’t seem entirely sure you were joking.

“Just sit down and eat,” you sighed. “There’s nowhere else.”

He sat.

Silence crackled between you like the sky before a thunderstorm as you ate your lunches.

“So,” Jackson started cautiously, “how have you been?”

You gave a dry snort. “Oh, just fucking peachy. I’m going to be homeless in two days, thanks to you.”

“What?!”

Jackson listened with a deepening frown as you told him about your roommate plight. Then he offered you a room at his house.

“Go to hell. I’m not going to move in with you like nothing ever happened!”

“No, it wouldn’t be like that. I have a spare bedroom. It’s a big house, and I could use help with the bills. Please—it’s the least I can do. Just until you get back on your feet.”

September 17th

It wasn’t like you had much choice.

You moved into Jackson’s house as originally planned, albeit under different circumstances. Instead of sharing his bed, he cleared out the spare room he’d been using, in theory, as a “gym,” and in practice as a storage closet. There was plenty of space, and with how late he always worked at the university, you’d barely see him anyway.

This might just work out.

September 20th

This was never going to work.

Your heart broke all over again every morning you walked downstairs and saw Jackson in the kitchen making pancakes, because every time, you had to fight the urge to come up behind him and wrap your arms around his waist like you used to do.

God, you wanted him back. If only you could erase the image of him with her from your mind.

October 7th

Jackson begged you to take him back.

One thing after another had gone wrong after he publicly confronted the Meyerist Movement. The cult pressured the publisher to pull his book. The university put him on leave while they investigated his alleged relationship with a student. You wandered into the living room that night and found him curled up on the couch, and his resolve broke.

There were tears in his eyes as he tried to pull you into a hug, and when you jerked away, they cascaded down his cheeks. He kept saying he was sorry over and over.

“Please. I need you. Everything is falling apart—if I could at least have you to hold onto… just one thing that wasn’t broken. Please, just tell me how to make it up to you. Haven’t I done enough? If I could take it all back, I would. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me? Please let me hold you?”

This was hard for you, too. Part of you wanted to give in, tell him it was all OK, let him kiss you, and see him smile. The worst part of all of this was that you still loved him, but you could never trust him again. He put on such a sweet, innocent act—he was a wonderful boyfriend—but now you knew he was a manipulative liar.

You should never have moved in.

“There’s no undoing the past. We both need to move forward, not back. I’m going to start looking for other places to live.”

October 8th

Morning brought a more sober Jackson knocking at your door. Dark circles hung under his eyes, but he hadn’t been crying recently.

“Please don’t feel like you have to leave. I can get my shit together. I’m calling a therapist today.”

“That’s a good idea.”

“Yeah.” He stared at his feet, shifting on the hardwood floor.

“Jackson… I’ll only hurt you if I stay. This is too hard on you.” For us. “Besides, I can’t freeload here forever.”

“You do pay rent, you know.”

“I know, but—”

“I only have the kids every other weekend, and it’s a big house. It gets lonely. You’re doing me a favor being here.”

November 10th

In the last month, Jackson convinced you there was no hurry to move out.

He was a great roommate. He cooked, cleaned, respected your boundaries. He was a truly decent man, if an unfaithful lover, but since you were just friends now, it didn’t matter who he fucked. The biggest concern was that he wanted you back, and living together was a constant source of emotional pain. But on that front, he finally seemed to be moving on.

Whenever the topic came up, he assured you that you were welcome to stay as long as you wanted.

“It’s just so hard to find a decent place in my price range.”

“I mean it,” Jackson reiterated, adding emphasis. “If you want to stay, I enjoy having a roommate.”

You searched for hidden motives in his voice, his expression. Was this part of a long game to get you back? But his tone was friendly and open. Knowing how quickly he jumped from his ex-wife to you to Sarah, there was no way he didn’t already have his eye on someone new. At this point, you were just roommates.

“You mean permanently? Isn’t living with an ex a recipe for disaster?”

He chuckled. “The last few years with my wife were much worse than this, trust me. We were trying to stay together until the kids went to college, but emotionally, we were already divorced. It was awful… sharing a room. Constant fighting.” His eyes took a dull, faraway look as he remembered.

Worry lines creased your brow. “Are you sure you want to put yourself through that again?”

He grinned, snapping out of it, and patted you on the head like you were one of his kids. “You are nothing like her. We’re friends.”

You liked the sound of that. Friends.

November 14th

The sound of screams greeted you as you opened the front door and hung your keys on their hook next to your jacket. Jackson was watching a scary movie marathon in the living room, apropos of the foggy autumn weather.

“Candyman. Care to join?” He patted the cushion beside him.

You stayed up past midnight in your pajamas, sharing popcorn, laughing, and hiding your eyes from the gory parts. Jackson remained on the opposite side of the couch, careful not to touch you.

November 19th

You caught Jackson having lunch with an attractive student. It made your blood freeze, then boil when he walked with her back to his office.

Alone.

Fists clenched, you pressed your ear to the closed door, and heard… an essay on the role of religion in perpetuating homophobia. He was helping her edit a paper. Like professors do.

You followed them all the way from the dining hall just for talking.

When did you become a crazy ex? Why would you care if he was schtupping a hot student? You wanted him to move on—you were glad he didn’t tear up every time you walked into the kitchen anymore. But you knew then that you weren’t over him yet.

If you saw him out with someone new, it would sting like he was betraying you all over again. So you tried hard to be the one to move on first.

November 30th

A car honked outside.

“Oh, that’s my date,” you apologized to Jackson. “Gotta go.”

You got a little rush of schadenfreude from the kicked-puppy look that flashed across his face as you left him mid-conversation, sitting at the kitchen table across from your abandoned teacup. It felt like a big fuck-you, letting him know you’d be fucking someone else. A dare: let’s see if you really meant it when you said we could be friends.

But the look had barely contorted his features when he swallowed it down and smiled, “Be safe.”

He was probably going on plenty of dates himself and just didn’t tell you out of consideration for your feelings. He didn’t want you to feel used, betrayed, and immediately replaced. You were both moving on.

After a string of Tinder hookups, you felt like Jackson was out of your system, romantically speaking.

December 17th

A light dusting of snow floated down through the pale morning air. Jackson woke up on the left side of the bed, as he did every morning, and as he did every morning, turned to his right hoping to find you there. The blankets were cold.

He shivered.

You had a date last night and didn’t come home. He waited up, but never heard your car in the driveway, your keys in the door. Since you weren’t there to see his red eyes, he allowed himself to cry.

February 14th

A dull, rhythmic thumping carried through the walls. The creaking of a mattress. You cried out a name, voice cracking as you came for the second time.

It was the same guy again.

Casual hookups he could handle, but it had been the same guy for weeks now. Jackson told himself he deserved this. This was what he did to you, only while you were together. When you trusted him not to. He deserved to hear the one he loved being taken by another man.

As much as he wanted you to be his, you weren’t. He had no right to feel burning bile rising in his stomach at each of your moans and gasps. You were doing nothing wrong.

“You live here. Of course you can have dates over. No, it’s not awkward. We’re friends.”

A hot tear slid from his eye as he buried his head in a pillow.

This guy better take care of you.

May 1st

He didn’t have a roommate anymore. Not really. You spent all your time at Rodney’s apartment.

Soon you would move out, and he’ll have lost you forever.

He wanted to warn you not to move so fast, but what right did he have to judge? He let you move at the same pace with him. Let you trust him, fall in love with him, have a spare toothbrush on his sink within a few months. All the while, he figured a little action on the side wouldn’t hurt. Did he think he could chase two of you at once and get to keep the winner?

Idiot.

Sinner. That’s what his mami would say.

The few times you were home, he didn’t express his concerns about your boyfriend. He would only sound jealous, and it would push you away. If he wanted to be someone you would still answer the phone for when you moved out, he had to be a good friend, not a jealous ex.

Fuck. He hoped it worked out between you and Rodney. He really did. He hoped you were happy.

October 2nd

You came home for the first time in weeks crying. Heavy tears rolled down your face, legs shaking as you crawled up the stairs to your bedroom. Jackson was off the couch in an instant, spring up to follow you.

“Hey… Hey, what’s wrong?” He gingerly touched your shoulder, palm spreading out to make comforting circles when you didn’t shake him off. “Did something happen? Do you want to talk about it?”

You shook your head, sniffing as you slumped down onto your bed. Jackson sat beside you, worry etched into his features. He was so cute. After all this time, he still cared about you. You thought about all the times he’d begged for you back, in the beginning, desperate to hold you again. Fuck, you just wanted to feel that wanted again.

“Rodney and I broke up,” you mumbled.

“Oh. I’m sorry to hear th—”

You gripped the hair at the back of his head and tugged him roughly into a kiss. Every muscle in his neck and shoulders tensed. A surprised noise was muted between your crushing lips. You could have sworn, for a moment, he started kissing you back, but then his big hands clamped like two vices on your shoulders, and he pushed you away.

“What are you doing?” His eyes were wide.

“What does it look like?” you purred, fingers clawing at the buttons of his cardigan. “I want you to take me, Jackson.”

His hands stopped you from leaning close again. “No. Stop it.”

“Come on, this is what you wanted, isn’t it?”

“We can’t… I won’t take advantage of you like that. You’re just upset, and—”

“Fuck you! So you’ll fuck anyone and not give a shit—you’ll fuck around on me and break my heart, but you won’t fuck me when I’m asking you to?! The one time I just need you to be there, and now you’re on your high fucking horse, pretending to be a good guy?! I bet you’d screw Sarah! Fuck you. Fuck you!”

Your shoulders shook as your tirade broke down more and more into sobs. Deep down, you knew he was right. You’d regret it in the morning. But you couldn’t he just… want you?

“Why? Why not? Am I that… am I that unlovable?”

“Because you crying.” Tears were shimmering in his eyes as he said it, softly wiping a tear from your cheek. “You’re crying.”

With a gasp, you threw yourself down on the bed and buried your face in a pillow. You screamed into it, your own breath hot and wet against your face. Jackson’s weight shifted the mattress beside you, and your hand shot out in panic, blindly groping toward the movement. You felt pathetic. Needy. But you didn’t want to be alone.

“Don’t go.”

The mattress sank back down under him. “I’m not going anywhere. I won’t take advantage of you, but if you want me to stay, I’ll stay. As long as you want.”

That was all you wanted to hear in that moment, to know someone wouldn’t abandon you. His warm hand rubbed your back in slow circles as you wept, patiently listening as you told him everything in disjointed, broken pieces. How you were just being paranoid—invading Rodney’s privacy when he left his phone unlocked. You were paranoid because your last boyfriend cheated. Then you found the lewd messages, and it didn’t seem real. Plans to meet at a bar downtown. You didn’t believe it until he was toweling off, telling you something came up with his mom, and he’d be out for a while. And you followed him down to the bar and saw them together.

“He was an asshole,” Jackson said.

“Am I doomed? Cursed? Why does everyone cheat on me? Is it my fault?”

“No. Of course not.”

“Shut up! You did it, too,” you snapped. “I’m just not special enough to hold anyone’s attention. I’ll never be enough.”

“No,” he growled with a ferocity that startled you, “You’re wonderful, and anyone would be lucky to have you. That guy was an asshole, and so was I for taking you for granted. You did nothing to deserve this. One day you’ll find someone who appreciates you… who learns to treat you the way you deserve to be treated before they lose the best thing to ever happen to them.”

You shifted to press yourself closer to him. The tears didn’t stop, but a warmth spread through your chest. Jackson felt like a cozy sweater—warm and familiar. Easy to cry into. His arms were surprisingly solid and thick, but gentle when they closed around you.

He was a comfortable old sweater you could slip back on after leaving it in the closet for a year.

***

Hours passed by, and you had no more tears left. No energy left to move. Jackson was still beside you, keeping watch, as promised. You were curled up with your head in his lap, his fingers in your hair.

When he was sure you were asleep, he carefully extracted himself from under you, gradually shifting your head onto the pillow so you wouldn’t wake up. He breathed, heart aching as he looked down at your sleeping form. You deserved better than tear-stained cheeks. He knew he had no right to be so angry, but he couldn’t stand seeing you hurt again.

You wouldn’t have been if he had just…

He let his tears fall silently. This was about you, and he didn’t want to make you console him, but you were asleep now. He could let go.

He ran his fingers through your hair one last time. Then, with a furtive glance, he bent and pressed a tender kiss to your forehead.

“I love you,” he whispered. “I never stopped.”

• ● • ━━━━━─ ••●•• ─━━━━━ • ● •

Tags: @beccabarba / @itsjustmyfantasyroom / @thatesqcrush / @dianilaws / @permanentlydizzy / @mrsrafaelbarba / @madamsnape921 / @astrangegirlsmind / @neely1177 / @onerestein / @dreamlover31 / @isvvc-pvscvl / @shroomiehomie / @storiesofsvu / @welcometothemxdhouse / @feedthemadness-sweetie / @law-nerd105 / @amelia-song-pond / @michael-rooker / @xecq / @madpanda75 / @alwaysachorusgirl / @bananas-pajamas / @leanor-min / @mad-girl-without-a-box / @katierpblogg / @worldofvixen / @sassyada / @detectivebarba

#Jackson Neill #jackson neill x reader #my writing

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low-budget-korra · 4 years

Text

Lets talk about Korra (again)

i already made this analysis, and it was well received but i dont know, i wanna do it again. Why not right? My english is better now than was when i made that analysis so i think this one will be better written

What a way to introduce a protagonist. This line and this scene tell us everything we need to know about Korra at that time and everything she knew about herself.

In book one Korra is a 17′s old teenager who have no idea how the world, how life is outside the training center she grew up in and had been locked up since ever. So she is not only naive but have lack of social skills

Oh, and not everyone who lack’s social skills will act like Zuko and Azula okay? Korra can be confident, expressive and outgoing and still have problems when it comes to social skills.One thing dont exclude the other.

“I’m the Avatar and you gotta deal with it” did you guys notice that only for that line we can see the entire opposite on how she treat her role as avatar in comparisson with Aang? And im not here to judge because is two very different contexts.

As far as we know, Korra grew up without friends or romantic partners. Of course, she had her training partners but i believe that they are just that.

So her entarely perception of herself was around her duty as Avatar, she didnt have personal life, she barely was Korra...She was The avatar and thats that.

So she came to Republic City, it was a mess.

Its funny to see that she have no touch when it comes to simply talk to people, i guess when you grew up away from society, this happens. And yes, she is cocky and had to learn that people arent there to somewhat please her, and she learned that quicky.

Thats why the Pro Bending was important for her character, not only for training but also as means of socilization.

Now lets talk about the villains: Amon and Tarrlok

The two of them represents two differents threats to Korra. Amon represents a threat to her duty as Avatar while Tarrlok represents a threat to Korra as a person.

In episode 4 we have what i still thinks is the darker episode from TLOK. In this episode Amon ambushes Korra in the final moments... Even knowing that they did their best to make Amon’s power and control be non-sexualized as possible still...He have her down on her knews, totally helpless and he even invades Korra’s personal space by touching in her face forcing her to look at him. He didn't have to sexually touch her to violate her.

And right after, the fear in Tenzin voice when asking what happened after seeing her laying in the ground like that, and how Korra is sobing in his arms teeling him how powerless and helpless she felt. I mean...Oh, and she keeps terryfied by him until he takes her bending.

Tarrlok in the other hand doesnt do much different from his brother and started to harass Korra because he cant take ‘no’ as a answer when Korra didnt wanted to join his task force.

Whats interesting is that if it wasnt for Tarrlok harassement and maniputation, Korra wouldnt have joined his task force and wouldnt have confronted Amon and wouldn't have gone through that terrible encounter.

The thing is that Korra is caught right in the middle of a politcal power dispute over the city, something that she for sure wasnt prepare for it. And both Amon and Tarrlok woud hurt or kill her without think twice about it if that means gain power. And that was exacly what happened

Tarrlok tried to manipulate her and keep her on leash where he could, and when his tatics didnt worked anymore he alreay had a plan B. Yes that whole metal box in that cabin in the middle of nowhere was made especifically for her and maybe Tenzin if he also get in his way.

In the end Korra lost the physical battle against both but won the ethical battle also against both. She was the responsable for expose both of them as corrupted and hypocrites. But at what price? Amon was able to remove the bends of the Avatar. And without them, how could she be the Avatar?

Remember that her entirely conception of herself was built around her duty as Avatar, be the avatar. After all, everything she was, everything she'd trained so hard for, had been destroyed in minutes. Thats why i still strongly believe that she was thinking about killing herself at the end, nobodys goes all sad and crying to in front of a clifft without thinking about jumping from it.

But she, i think given up the idea and just sit and started to crying when Aang appeared and help her, giving her bendings back in one of the best scenes of the show. So after have everything solve and still managed to get the boy she was in love with, things where great and she “move on”

In that first half, Korra is unbearable. Everything she learned in Book 1 how to be more mature, less spoiled and all, was thrown in the trash and she was the same "child" of the book one only worse.

Until I stopped and realized that I was also unbearable and childish like this when I had my bad phases of anxiety and depression, as defense mechanism and keep people away. Returning to Korra, and if this way of acting of her was nothing more than this defense mechanism?

Because guess what, i dont think she “move on” from all that happened in Book One that fast, and for add more drama she discovered that was her father idea of keeping her locked up training in that training center we saw in book one and not traveling like avatars before her. No wonder she felt betrayed. And for adding even more drama, people still keep treating her like child, so she was despered for some validation. Something that she found in her uncles arms but she was betrayed by him after.

In the end, Korra again goes through a traumatic experience when she has her connection with past lives destroyed. We see how it affected her when she apologizes to Tenzin, through tears. And Tenzin, as the excellent master he is, tries to motivate her to face Vaatu again (now merged with Unalaq, her uncle) and again she saves the day even after go throught a traumatic event

In the final moments, we see the innocent decision to reconnect the world of spirits and the world of men. And we also see Korra and Mako permanently end their turbulent relationship.

Book 3 begins in a more mature, we see all the characters being presented in a more mature way and it seems that Korra now has overcome everything that has passed. We have the relationship between Korra and Asami deepening as well

In Book 3, called "Change" we have a great sacrifice from Korra. Her life goes down a notch when she decides to save the new airbenders from Zaheer and the Red Lotus, the only villain until now that really threat her life since their sole goal was to kill the avatar.

Korra won again but this time victory costed way too much. Yes she save the day again but now she was physically and psychologically defeated. It was too much, she broke.

Book 4 begins and we only saw Korra in the final minutes and she is unrecognizable. We see that, once proud and courageous avatar, in someone depressed and cowerd. We never have saw Korra like that, even when she was afraid of Amon she wasnt like that.

Korra is afraid of being the Avatar again and her fight against PTSD is still one of the most sensitive, responsable and honest representation of Mentall Issues that i saw, and it was before this subject gain more space on media. It was before people started to give attention to this

I also think that she was having flashs from her other fights and not only the one against Zaheer.

Another thing I think is worth mention is that Korra took 3 years to feel safer and re-embrace her duties as Avatar. It was not 3 weeks or 3 months, it was 3 years. And anyone who suffers from some mental illness knows very well the stigma that is, the fight that is, because everyone wants you to be well faster as possible when the truth is that many times you spend years fighting against this. And this is a pressure that falls on you.Imagine, seeing all your friends moving forward while you continue "stock in the same place"?

Only after Korra confronts Zaheer, I think that was a way to show her coping with the trauma, she improves to the point of returning to be the great Avatar we know. I personally still struggles with this scene because put the victim in front of her agressor may not be the best idea but i understand that she needed to see that he was just a man and not the invencible monster her mind was telling her

One of the lines that stuck with me the most was in the TLOK version of the ember island players, the one that made a recap of the show before the finale. When Korra said “I was so naive” just before we watch her narration of her journey, we can feel pain, sadness and strenght. Janet was amazing in the way the delivered this line.

And this fucking quote i saw here on tumblr still is the goat: “The Last Airbender is a story of a boy who becomes a god. The Legend of Korra is the story of a goddess who becomes a girl "

And I still get really pissed when someone comes to talk shit about Korra because she is such an incredible heroine and her journey is also so incredible.

The story of how life can be hard and unfair, how it can hurt and paralyze, but there is always a reason to move on. We should always move on.

Korra is definitely not weak, quite the opposite, she is one of the if not the strongest heroine I have ever seen. Korra inspires overcoming

#korrasami #avatar korra #asami sato #mako #tenzin #bolin #lin beifong #su beifong #kuvira #zaheer #amon #unalaq #tarrlok #the legendd of korra #legend of korra #tlok #lets talk about #avatar

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torikengel · 4 years

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Thomas Hewitt x Reader (Part 1)

a/n: thank you so much for your support <3 you make me motivated to continue, parts 2/3 and 4 are already on my profile <3

You were traveling with a group of friends across Texas. You were all from a big city, so they decided to go on a road trip. There were five of you in total, two girls, two guys, and you. At first, you refused to go and wondered why they even bothered taking you because they were two couples and you were just the fifth wheel. Well, you weren’t very familiar with one of the couples, but you knew the other one. At least you knew the girl, cause she was the one to invite you to this trip. It was known that you were well off and they desperately needed more money for gas and food on this trip. You weren’t dumb and it was very clear soon enough that the sum of money you were required to bring was much higher than the one of your so-called friends. So why you decided to go? You thought some adventure in your life wouldn’t hurt and you were yearning for some fresh air outside of the city. And it wouldn’t be bad to make some friends along the way, you thought. But soon you realized that wasn’t going to happen. The boys were eyeing you up and down and the girls weren’t happy about you. You would like to think that you were fairly pretty with an attractive face and a nice body. And since Texas is hot you were simply wearing a tank top and shorts. You were sitting in the back seat, buckled up, and looking out of the window as your companions didn’t seem keen on talking with you. “Hey, Emma, can we stop for a while, I need to go… you know,” said Chloe who was sitting next to you in the back seat with her boyfriend Matt to the driver, Emma. “Sure,” Emma responded slightly annoyed. You stopped in a remote town in the middle of nowhere. It didn’t seem that many people were still living there. Emma drove to the nearest shop and parked. The place was swarming with bikers and as soon as Chloe stepped out of the vehicle they whistled at her. “Wait babe, I am coming too,” Matt said as he spotted their sly smirks and how they hungrily looked at his girlfriend. “Y/n? Are you coming too?” Emma scoffed, “I am definitely not stopping again just because of you.” And she vanished in the shop as her boyfriend Chris followed right after her.

Someone should stay in the car and guard our stuff, you thought for yourself. But you really needed to drink something, so in the end, you grabbed your purse and walked in the store as the bikers kept catcalling you on your way. On your way there you saw Chloe and Matt whispering to each other, well if it could be considered whispering, cause you heard them. “Look at that old hag! Bet she never stepped out of this hell hole. Jeez, this town smells bad.” Chloe laughed and Matt added “Yeah, disgusting, now imagine living here babe, I bet they are all diseased.” You turned to the elderly woman behind the counter, you intuitively knew she could hear everything. You grabbed a soda and went to the counter, “I am very sorry.” You said with your head down as you didn’t dare to look her in the eyes. “Don’t worry ‘bout that darlin’, my family is used to this.” When you finally dared to look at her, you could see that her eyes were traveling up and down, scanning your body. Oh well, your clothes weren’t the most appropriate for this traditional part of Texas. “My name is y/n…” you said giving her the money for your soda. “Please keep the change.” You added as you wanted to vanish into thin air from embarrassment. The change you were talking about was like triple the price of soda. “Oh no, m’dear, I can’t accept that.” She finally smiled at your generosity and politeness. “Please, I insist… Mrs.?” You stuttered. “Luda Mae,” she helped you out. “Mrs. Luda Mae”, you repeated, smiling back at her. “Come already, we don’t have the whole day to wait… or we will leave you here!” Chloe shouted from the car and Emma honked. You jumped up and rushed to them while waving at Luda Mae, cause who knows, they might actually leave you there.

Emma was driving and chatting with her friends, not paying attention to you, even though it was she who invited you on this trip. And not only she wasn’t paying attention to you, but to the road as well, because she didn’t notice the spike strips across the road. Everyone yelped and held their breath when the van slid across the road and fell to the pit on its side… on your side. In the brief moment of despair, you regretted not being buckled up for the first few minutes of the trip. Your cheek smashed on the window that broke into shards, cutting up your skin. The worst part was that both Chloe and Matt fell on top of you as well. You squirmed under their weight but to no avail. “Shit, shit, shit, shit,” Emma screamed as she lost control of the vehicle and saw her boyfriend falling head forward on a sharp shard of glass, piercing his flesh. After a few minutes of shock, Emma got out of the car, seemingly okay, and helped Chloe and Matt. After that, they all hurried to help Chris. Nobody cared about you. You could feel the blood gushing out of your wounds on your arm and cheek. In the end, you managed to scramble the last bits of your strength and got out of the car without any help… Emma was in utter shock as she felt that her boyfriend didn’t show any signs of life. You didn’t know how to react, because you didn’t feel any pity. They didn’t help you and wouldn’t mind letting you die there on that backseat. You just shook your head and turned away, confused at what’s about to happen. “What’s wrong with you y/n! You look completely unphase by all this, explain yourself!” Emma screamed at you suddenly, letting out all of her anger on you. Before she could insult you any further you heard police sirens. “Thank god,” she calmed down a bit. Chloe was just shaking in Matt’s arms. The hope you all felt as the police car made its way towards you was slowly exchanged with fear. An older man with a sheriff’s uniform stepped out of the car with a shotgun. “So what do we have here… a bunch of lowly cowards it seems.” He spat on the ground and aimed the gun at you. “Get into the car, now!” he pointed at the police car, “The big guy in the back with two girls and this sexy babe in the passenger seat.” He aimed the shotgun at your head. “Wait, mister Hoyt, there’s my boyfriend still in the van!” Emma walked up to him trembling, apparently not grasping that this man isn’t here to help you. “My, my, do you think I care about your fucking boyfriend, bitch?” he turned down her request and took her by the wrist, “Maybe I will just take you next to me since you are so dumb, you need a lesson.” He tightened his grip on her wrist. “W-wait m-mister.” She stuttered, fear enveloping her. “T-take her instead… I swear we won’t tell anyone; you can do anything you want with her, even kill her, we will make something up, please just don’t hurt us.” She pointed her dirty finger at you and looked at Chloe and Matt, still in a tight embrace. “R-right guys? We won’t tell…” she desperately looked for a sign of approval from them. “Y-yes! We definitely won’t tell! I mean look, she’s way prettier for you sir!” Chloe added, throwing her pride behind her, Matt followed with a quick nod. “My, my what a friend you have,” Hoyt nearly died from laughter. He threw her aside on the hot ground. She slowly exhaled as she thought this was his way of saying yes. “I don’t like these types of bitches.” Without any hesitation, he shot Emma in the leg. She squealed and held her leg close to her, “You old bastard! We had a deal!” He only laughed a bit more before turning to the rest of you. “Now get in the car if you want to live. NOW!” he shouted and aimed the gun at Chloe and Matt who protectively stood in front of Chloe. “We have another hero here it seems.” Another shot followed, straight into Matt’s shoulder. He dropped to his knees in pain. “Who else?” he looked at you. After thinking for a few seconds, you dropped your eyes to the ground and went to the passenger’s seat of Hoyt’s police car. You decided to be smart about it. You didn’t dare to look back at him, all you heard were screams until everything was quiet again. Hoyt dragged your so-called friends’ bodies to the backseat. They were all breathing, just unconscious, their heads bloody. He probably hit them to make them easier to transport. He dragged Chris’s dead body out of the van as well, putting him into the trunk. After that, he sat in the driver’s seat next to you. “Come on, look at me. I don’ bite.” He licked his lips as you turned to face him. “Good girlie.” He said as he pressed some cloth over your nose and lips. You struggled for air, but then finally gave up and passed out as well.

You open your eyes to an unbearable headache which made you wish to never wake up at all. Where am I… shot through your mind as you tried to recall what led to your current situation. Right, your so-called friends tried to use you as their ticket out of this, as a bribe, as if you were a piece of meat. Your eyes were swollen and weak, so it was awfully hard to keep them open. You tried your best to inspect your situation a bit more. You couldn’t move your limbs, that’s for sure. So, you looked around again, adjusting your eyes to the dark atmosphere. It must’ve been a basement of some kind as there were no windows. You could see other metal tables except for the one you were tied to. There were various shiny metal tools around you consisting of cleavers, knives, and other stuff. Then you glanced above you to the ceiling. What you saw made you gag in disgust. Meat hooks, and on them two bodies hanging… Matt and Chloe. Then it hit you… out of confusion and tiredness, you didn’t pay attention to it before, but the whole basement smelled like death, rotting flesh, vomit, blood… everything mixed. Matt was missing half of his body and under him was a pool of blood, he was already dead. Chloe was missing one leg and one arm, seemingly still breathing, but not for long you thought for yourself. Sure, you were scared, because the same thing was going to happen to you, but you felt slight happiness in the back of your mind, no pity to be found. They abandoned you, they emotionally abused you, they used you for money, they would let you be raped and killed in exchange for their pathetic lives. They didn’t care about you. And now, despite their best efforts, you were here, alive, with all of your limbs, breathing while they were all almost dead. You couldn’t help to wonder why you were the last one to be butchered. You smiled for yourself “That’s what you get… even though I am going to be next, I still outlived you for long enough to laugh last.” And also, you didn’t know them before this trip except for Emma who wasn’t there right now. After these thoughts dispersed in your mind, you realized you could hear voices from above you. When you woke up, you were a bit groggy and didn’t pay attention to all of your senses right away. You recognized the female voice; without a doubt, it was Emma squealing in pain and disgust. “Let me go, let me go you ugly old bastard!” she screamed so loud it was piercing your ears. Instead of pitying her, it was more annoying to you, because you wanted the last minutes of your life to be as peaceful as possible. “Shut up, stupid bitch, or I will make you!” a familiar voice shouted back. Hoyt. Yeah, it must’ve been that guy, Sheriff Hoyt. Even though you assumed he wasn’t the real sheriff. You figured out what was happening upstairs. From the moment you met this Hoyt guy, you knew he was a pervert and a violent one. Even though he spared you in a way when he didn’t shoot you, well, you complied so he had no reason to. Then you realized that you checked your surroundings to the best of your ability while you didn’t even look at the state you were in. Your wrists and ankles hurt real bad. The leather cuffs were rubbing tightly against your sensitive red skin. Your cheek hurt as well as your arm. You weren’t sure if the glass shards were still in your arm or if someone took them out. You tried to position yourself in a way you could see the cut. It was deep and your skin was all bruised. Your whole body felt squished and sore, because of how Matt and Chloe fell on you during the accident. You were so tired… the screams above you got quieter and quieter each second as you fell into sleep again.

Loud footsteps in the basement woke you up and when you managed to lift your eyelids a huge man was towering over your lying body. He was wearing a bloody apron, shirt, and tie… very neat you thought for yourself. He smelled bad and there was a human-like mask on his face. He had greasy black hair that reached to his shoulders and partially hid his face. What captured your attention were his piercing blue eyes. He was scanning you, but you did the same as you stared deep into his eyes. He expected you to try to jump up, squirm, or make disgusted faces. He was used to it. All his life people called him names and bullied him, from his childhood to his teen years, and while he worked in the factory as an adult. He was always a monster, animal, disgusting freak in their eyes. Women made gagging noises when they saw him and then laughed in his face. Men picked on him, tried to fight him to get him in trouble. He suffered through it all until he finally unleashed all the pain and anger. Since then he saw people as either family or food, there was nothing in-between. You could see it in his eyes, the awaiting of your scream. But it never came, even after you noticed the cleaver in his hand. You had a neutral expression on your face while watching him. The pain was undeniable in his eyes. He wanted you to scream as it made it easier, so much easier… if you just called him a freak, if you tried to spit in his face… too easy. Finally, your lips parted, air leaving your mouth as you exhaled. He hated it, everything you did, he hated it because you made it hard. You had a beautiful face, perfect skin, attractive body, silky h/c hair, and shiny e/c eyes. You looked like one of the girls that would make fun of him and kick him again when he was already down. All the memories kept flooding into his mind as he raised the cleaver and prepared to swing. Now he expected you to squirm, shout and plead for your life, to at least cry or call him something nasty. But you peacefully smiled at him. “This is my end isn’t it?” you accepted your fate from the moment you woke up for the first time in this basement. You closed your eyes and prepared for the pain that would inevitably come with the blow. The man was confused like never in his life. Your sweet smile towards him melted his resolve. Here he was standing, all bloody with a cleaver ready to end your life and your perfect form was just lying under him in a dignified position without regrets. His eyes were full of sorrow. Nobody smiled at him before, laughed yes, mocked him too, but he never got that smile, smile without any prejudice in your then open eyes. There was no pain, just a wet feeling on your hurt cheek. For the first time, you yelped at the sudden touch and shot your eyes open again. There he was, standing over you, wiping the dry blood off your face with a wet rug. He stepped back, startled by your reaction. You could see how hurt he was… you couldn’t believe yourself. In this situation, with a murderer in a room with you, your instinct was telling you to pity him more than the couple hanging from the meat hooks. ”Sorry, I didn’t mean to do that; I just didn’t expect it… thank you.” You murmured under your breath. His eyes widened, first that innocent smile, now the honest tone in your voice as you apologized for being held captive. “My name is y/n. But I guess you don’t need to know that as you know…” your eyes pointed to the cleaver that was on the other table now. He didn’t say anything, but he shook his head. You didn’t know if that meant you would be spared or that he was content with knowing your name, you figured it was the latter though. After he calmed down, he stepped up again to clean your face and arm. You hissed a bit, but he knew it wasn’t at him, but at the pain. You didn’t know why he did all that when you are certainly going to be killed, if not by this man then by that Hoyt.

“What’s your name, if you don’t mind?” you broke the awkward silence. He shrugged, not replying. “You can’t speak?” you figure it wouldn’t hurt to ask and you wanted to know if he couldn’t or simply didn’t want to talk. You got a slight nod from him. “I see… But I can try and guess if you help me.” You came up with a solution. “I will say the alphabet and when I will get to the first letter of your name, you should touch the palm of my hand.” He seemed unsure but nodded again in the end. “A, B, C…” you continued until you got to T. He softly put a finger on your palm. “T…” you repeated, “That could be Tim, Tony, Thomas.” You wanted to continue, but he grabbed your finger when you said Thomas. “Thomas… Tommy.” You smiled at him. You didn’t know what got into you, but you were enjoying this sweet, tender moment. He was very gentle with you and didn’t kill you yet. Maybe it was because of how different your behavior was from everyone else.

He didn’t believe it. What was he doing, what were you doing, what were you doing to him? You were supposed to be another meal, just food, a piece of meat. But he couldn’t treat you like that when you were the first person outside of his family who treated him like a human being, without disgust and hate. Even Charlie and Monty sometimes treat him like a dog. He could sense that you were sincere. Some girls tried to seduce him before to save their lives and then stab him in the back. Once he fell for it, only for the first time though, he learned his lesson. But you didn’t try, you accepted that you were going to die here, and he couldn’t bring himself to end your life on his own.

“Damn what’s taking you so long down there, boy?” Hoyt opened the door to the basement and threw something on the stairs. “Don’ tell me you were able to finally man up?” Thomas seemed to be a bit lost, but you knew what he meant by that. “Anyhow, I am finished with it, it’s all yours now.” Hoyt pointed on the floor. You weren’t sure what he threw in the basement until now. It was Emma and she was still alive. Her mouth taped shut and hands tied behind her back. Hoyt descended into the basement and got rid of the tape on her lips. “You liked it bitch, didn’t ya?” he squeezed her cheeks and put a finger into her open mouth. She bit him as soon as she got the chance. A loud slap followed and he walked back up cussing her out. Hoyt was so focused on his finger, that he didn’t seem to care about why you were still alive. “Oh y/n! Help me, help me, please!” she trembled and smiled at you in disbelief. She obviously thought you were dead. Then she looked around to see her dead friends and screamed. Thomas grabbed her with his huge hands ready to hang her on the meat hook next to her friends. “You ugly fat bastard, let me go, stop it, you animal!” she kicked him wherever she could with both of her legs as they were tied together. You couldn’t hold back your laughter. However, your laughter stabbed Thomas in the back. So, you were the same after all. He thought about it and then realized it was for the better. But then you spoke “She looks like a fish out of the water, doesn’t she?” you giggled a bit more and then finally stopped. Thomas smiled under his mask before he realized what were the consequences. You indirectly stood up to him and it was funny and clever as well. “What… why would you laugh y/n? We are both going to die you dumb slut!” as the last word left her lips a shriek of pain echoed as Thomas stabbed the hook into her back. With the last strength, she spat in his face. “F-filthy animal, m-murderer, you and your damn fucking family can all burn in hell…” she mumbled. “I bet he would be a better friend than you.” Before she could come up with a comeback of any kind, he slit her skull with a cleaver. He grabbed a chainsaw and started dismembering her. You actively watched, fascinated by the situation. You weren’t a sadist, not at all, but it just all seemed like a weird nightmare to you. Maybe you passed out during the car crash and you are still dreaming. However, the smell of blood brought you back into reality. After Thomas was done, he turned back to you, freshly bloodied. He expected to see a disgusted face, tears, fear. He did it on purpose… to make you scream, to make you hate him like everyone else. “To be honest… she deserved it. Imagine, she tried to give me to Hoyt to save herself. She wouldn’t mind killing me.” You shrugged as you were very stiff from holding your head on the side.

No, no, no, no, no… it was all wrong. Thomas’ heart raced as he looked at you in disbelief, your e/c eyes piercing his soul. You saw him kill your friend, well at the very least your companion and then you also witnessed al the gory stuff that came with it, but you looked unphased, maybe a bit satisfied with his work... you didn’t scream, didn’t curse, didn’t hate him. He grabbed the cleaver and held it above you, then swung and…

#thomas hewitt #thomas hewitt x reader #thomas hewitt x oc #thomas hewitt/you #texas chainsaw massacre #slasher x reader #the texas chainsaw massacre #smut #fluff #slashers #slashers x you #leatherface #thomas brown hewitt #x reader #fanfic #i made an attempt #story #roadtrip

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memryse · 3 years

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hello tumblr i present my canon-compliant "DSMP But... Everybody Discovered Large-Scale Organised Religion" mianite au which took a few hours to write up oops. basically here is a list of which god everybody would follow and why, based on canon events (i have therefore left out a couple of the members who don't really do lore or be on the server much because i definitely don't know about them enough to be accurate!)

dream: mianite. obsessed with control, you get it. went too far though and developed his own obsession with controlling the server so he is now godless and in jail

tommy: dianite. tommy is a favourite of dianite's - he's idealistic with a penchant for chaos, and like i said in my other post dianite probably sees himself in tommy a little. they're both misunderstood as Bad People

tubbo: ianite -> dianite, he converts post-doomsday. grew up as a follower of ianite and trying to follow her path put added pressure on him during his presidency. embraces being a dianitee with the start of the nuke program, but he keeps all his ianitee family heirlooms. ianite still holds a soft spot for him because of his family and occasionally gives him minor blessings. that being said she's of course a little disappointed he chose to change gods, but respects his decision

ranboo: no god, but enderwalk ranboo is an acolyte of ianite; awakeboo eventually converts to ianite when he reads awakeboo's note and decides to become more active in conflict resolution. he realises ianite actually aligns with his newfound ideals, and is of course more in touch with his ender side. however prior to this he wasn't really very keen on worshipping any gods, seeing as all he saw from them was wars waged in their names.

wilbur: also an atheist. probably prayed to dianite during pogtopia ("dream, i want to be your vassal" type beat) but other than that he's the type to criticise organised religion and be an independent leader, no need for gods. wilbur and ranboo narrative foils my beloveds!!!

techno: ianite. the thing about c!techno is he has one goal and he will stick to that no matter what - it's not total order, but it's not chaos either because there is motivation and reasoning behind it. also, a core tenet of ianitee ideology is not involving yourself in conflict until somebody personally wrongs you. much like butcher army era techno where he retreats to a peaceful (more godly, in this case) life until he's hunted down, at which point he Fucks Shit Up. in general techno holds grudges and takes even slight betrayals very seriously.

phil: ianite. i can see antarctic duo as former warriors of ianite! idk i don't have much to say phil is just.. a chill old warrior. probably jaded and tired of fighting wars for his goddess, but he still prays to her. specifically he prayed every night that wilbur could finally find balance in the afterlife. :)

niki: also ianite. definitely. niki values her own beliefs and morals, she's her own independent self. maybe she was a mianitee pre-nov 16th, but not since then. this makes the syndicate pretty much just a secret squad of ianitees (+ ranboo who everyone kind of just assumes is an ianitee given that, yknow, enderman). this is extra fun with the syndicate table being an end portal

sam: mianite 10000000%. he puts his commitment to duty above all else. not really much more to say he is just fully committed to keeping the server safe by carrying out mianite's will and imprisoning dream.

foolish: he's a god himself, so he doesn't follow any of the main three. however in the past he did work with mianite, enforcing his control over the land. from what we know about his totem of death period it wasn't like.. wanton destruction, it was him seeking control through violence, so i'm not inclined to say he worked with dianite back then.

george: man just wants to sleep and farm wheat, he's mianite. ez.

sapnap: also mianite. dream team as mianite's strongest and most revered knights!!!!!!

puffy: she's a pirate lady i don't know what to tell you other than she was part of capsize's crew. ianitee pirate ladies i care you. plus i feel like puffy centres mostly on people and not allying herself with specific nations or causes, she believes in balance above all.

eret: i view the greater dsmp as a mianitee nation, so as king of it they obviously have to follow mianite. eret has always strove to be a good king and help their nation prosper. plus, who knows what went on in the past with foolish. former mianite warriors eternal duo? i think so! (i think it would be cool if a literal reincarnation of herobrine was a mianitee purely because it fucks with everybody's expectations)

quackity: dianite. not just because he's chaos incarnate at times but like his entire current arc is so reminiscent of the fact that s2 dianite was literally a businessman. rip ghost dianite you would've loved c!quackity

fundy: oh boy here's a complex one. fundy switches gods frequently - look how much he craves acceptance from authority figures, from a substitute parental figure. i think right now his prophetic dreams could be interpreted as him being chosen by a certain god who sees potential in him, but i can't say who bc we don't really know too much about them or even why he's suddenly having them. that being said his chaotic scamming foxboy side definitely embodies dianite and he should have stuck with dianite the entire time but nah he needs Validation

jack manifold: follows dianite, but dianite isn't really pleased with him trying to kill tommy so often (seeing as he likes tommy). this is why he has such comically bad luck. his god is continually fucking with him.

karl: ianite, specifically chosen by her to become the historian of the server. the purple theme.. the duty to write down history as it truly happened (as opposed to censoring history like a certain mianite did). the existence of both the in between and the other side. karl Is balance. thank you. (also this makes karlnapity's marriage one mianitee, one ianitee and one dianitee. diversity win!)

schlatt: mianite (derogatory)

the eggpire is pretty much just the darkness isn't it. mianite was the blueprint actually.

bbh: dianite at first, judging by the badlands' ideology. corrupted by the darkness though.

antfrost: also dianite, but probably really lowkey about it and only ever prayed when the badlands needed his blessings. again, corrupted now

hannah: mianite - her connection to nature is by extension also a connection to mianite, the god of the overworld. plus she cared about maintaining harmony on the server and went to lengths to ensure it like the whole "killing her own dogs to protect them" thing. currently on her corrupted girlboss arc though

punz: dianite, he likes money and killing people idk what more you expect from me. even after joining the eggpire this has not changed at all. he'll work for other gods' followers for the right price but he's not changing his core beliefs

ponk: i don't know very much about him i'm ngl, especially not pre-eggpire. prior to his corruption though i do kinda like the idea of a mianitee doctor doing fucked up little experiments idk he just has mianitee vibes to me in the same way tucker was a mianitee.

skeppy: he and bbh are obviously both dianite together prior to the egg. it simply would not be right of me to put him anywhere else.

purpled: ianite. the colour purple... the tendency to stay so far out of conflict that he doesn't even log onto the server... mans was born to be an ianitee actually

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