#but now she got what she wants she's like... eew

[finalepic]

✱ @svftlove : 2/3

"you’re an idiot if you actually think i’d like someone like you."

[smww4ever]

Lois & Clark

Most people when they hear you are a SuperWonder fan, think you know nothing of Lois Lane. Assume you were born yesterday and just popped out of nowhere with this radical notion of SuperWonder.

No. I grew up on Clois. That’s all that was on the movie and tv screens. The love interest didn't really become a 'thing" until the show came out in the 90s to coincide with the comic where they get married. At least to me, it was always Superman’s girlfriend in the comics, playing around with different love interests. They finally decided to tie him down permanently with Lois. I’ll talk more about that in a little bit. But I want to first write about my thoughts and reactions to the finale of the Superman & Lois show.

I don't subscribe to Max. Can't afford it. I'm barely making ends meet. And it's not the type of show I'm interested in watching. I'm not a Clois fan anymore (or maybe I never really was). But what really shocked me, well maybe I shouldn't say shocked but found very interesting was what the writers of the show did with these characters.

I found out that both Superman and Lois die in the finale. She died of cancer. It came back. And Superman died of a heart attack. Yes you read that right. How? Well he received a heart transplant from Sam Lane. Yes you read that right too. His heart was ripped out of his chest by Doomsday and got squashed by Lex's boot.

Take a moment.

Ok we are back.

Like wtaf?

Oh and something about a serum that got the human heart of Sam Lane to work and go into Superman’s body according to his holo mom in the fortress. Don’t know any details as to how they did it, or who performed the surgery etc.

So, Kryptonians are not as advanced as we thought? Now I know why they sent him to Earth.

It's Dollar Store Earth.

But wait. Don't we have stem cells, and research into growing human organs?

If Krypton was an advanced civilization that achieved interplanetary and inter-galaxy space travel, wouldn't they have already solved that?

I mean his dad was a scientist? Maybe he wasn't that kind of scientist, huh?

Ok I had to stop and just re-read what I wrote. Are we in some alternate reality?

Yes we are. If this is the type of stuff they are writing into Superman. And people —I have no idea of the percentage that watched— think this is the best ever Superman, we are so f****d. They lapped this up. Guess they'll lap up Gunn's stuff too. You know dogs eat their vomit. Ok I know kinda gross.

He died twice. In this show he died twice. And neither him nor Lois lived on. He didn't cure her cancer. And because he only had a human heart lived less than if he had his own heart or a Kryptonian. And the writers wanted to give him his brother's heart. But most fans still think he would have only lived a few more decades. They are still thinking maximum life span like 80-90. Which is the life span of a human. Yet the lore is he can live centuries. Ok talk about a rip-off.

And they are crying, weeping, moved over this?

Superhero soap opera crud.

Meh.

Superman, The Movie

Ok I'll start here. I'll be honest about my impressions.

I saw the movie in the theater when it came out in 1978. It was an exciting time. As a kid you could imagine. What was cool was there was a movie theater down the street from where I lived. A neighborhood movie theater. It has long since been demolished. But I remember that opening shot to Superman and the music. The thrill, the magic. It took you there. A man could fly. Superman!

As a kid, when the damsel in distress got introduced, my impression was like "her"? Eew. Like that is so weird. Of course, mind you I'm a kid. All that romantic, gushy, kissy stuff was weird and gross, but it just didn't make sense to me.

Even as kid, I knew something was off.

Superman 2, something is really off. He did what? Well thankfully General Zod and his gang made the movie cool, but Clark was just dumb. We got to see Jor-El again. And mom too.

Superman 3, it started to fizzle. Richard Pryor? Well he was cool at the time. And of course Lana. I liked Lana better than Lois.

Superman 4, yes this run is over. Nobody cared.

Next!

The 90s roll in.

We get the Lois & Clark show. Renewed excitement. I didn't catch all of it. It was one episode per week. You didn't have streaming services back then. You had to wait the next week for next episode.

So I missed a lot of that show. I tuned out when Lois got her superpowers. It wasn't until years later, when Netflix came out and they had the entire series available. This was long after the death of Blockbuster. And when Netflix was actually good. The only service of it's kind. I had to order the DVDs to watch the entirety. So I decided to watch all of it from beginning to end.

My Impressions

Lois was a b**** in much of the show, especially the beginning. She was enamored with Superman, a completely different woman. Around Clark, it was opposite. The fact that Clark was infatuated with her in the face of how she treated him, says a lot about him.

It wasn't until the end of the series that Lois mellowed out after the reveal that Clark is Superman. Boy did it take a long time. I remember I was yelling at the tv: "You idiot!' Then they superfluously said something about how she will be the mother of descendants and an icon or something. I was like ok. Then a baby was delivered to their door with a Kryptonian blanket. That was it. Forgot who's it was. I think it was supposed to be General Zod's kid. I don't remember.

You know for a tv show, it had it's moments. Some nonsensical moments and romanticism. It did sweep you up, but it left me wanting. Like something was missing or off.

I know the storytelling of Superman could be better. It should be. But we are stuck on the creators who decided to initially write him this way.

Newspapers and media overall are dying. It's changing big time. Superman can be written differently. Heck this last show, they did.

You're probably wondering about Smallville. I tried to. Man I tried. A few episodes in was the same storyline. Everybody got infected with Kryptonite. This was canned Spam Superhero Soap Opera with hot young actors. I couldn't take it anymore.

Superman Returns. They did him dirty again. Brandon could have had a better everything. Some nice things, some not so nice things. I still watch that from time to time.

At least we got Brandon in the crossover. I made a meme for that.

The CW was total cheese fest. How it made it to the best Superman ever,... folks is smoking some pretty good weed. And I don't even smoke anything. Except for preferred smoked meat. 😂

But I'll wrap this up.

When I saw Superman and Wonder Woman together, my epiphany came. It made perfect sense. So I dug deep. Of course there was a history with these two. Most people don't know of this rabbit hole. They dismiss rather easily. There is a fandom that loves them. And fan art, etc. The rest is history shall we say.

The New 52 and the DCEU animated movies made this relationship the most sense. The most positive thing I've seen. Yes, there are stories that could haven been written better. As I've said before they never gave SuperWonder a chance.

Now, SuperWonder fans to this day, are ridiculed, harassed, scoffed at and talked down to because they still believe in Clark & Diana.

Yes because there is a story to tell. Many stories.

Until next time...

[agirlhasnonamehotd]

I give you a fluff piece about the crew playing Twister!

Alright, alright, look what I’ve got for game night!”

It’s Thursday night on the Prometheus, and to bring a little piece of home to the crew, Janek instilled a game night on board.

Monopoly, Life, Risk, Scattegories - you name it, Janek managed to bring it.

Tonight is a new one: Twister.

Vickers, Shaw, Holloway, David crowd around Janek. The newest guest crew member, the Engineer, wearily hangs back. He’s seen how past game nights have gone, and it looks more like fighting than fun. Nevertheless, he watches on with curiosity.

Janek lays the dotted mat on the floor and takes out the spinner.

“Everyone know how to play?” he asks.

All but the Engineer nod.

“Who wants to fill in the Big Guy?”

“I think,” David muses with a wicked smile, “ maybe it would be more fun to let him watch, and see what he makes of it.”

Holloway, feeling ever inadequate in the Engineer’s presence, likes the idea of having even such a trivial advantage.

“Sure,” he says, “let’s see if he’s as smart as Shaw thinks he is.”

From behind them, the Engineer snorts and glares down at Charlie.

Shaw, her pixie-like eyes aglow, grins and says, “I actually agree with David. Is that okay?”

She addresses the Engineer, who gives a slight nod in her direction.

Vickers, too, adds that she wouldn’t mind seeing a blind reaction from the apathetic giant.

So the game begins. Charlie, David and Shaw volunteer to begin and at first, all is as it should be. Shaw starts with a left foot on yellow, Charlie is next with a right hand on green, and David follows up with his left hand on red.

Easy enough.

On the second round the Engineer moves forward, particularly when Shaw has to lean over in front of Charlie to put her left hand on blue.

“Well isn’t this a mighty fine view?” he exclaims, whistling suggestively.

Another huff comes from the Engineer. He may not understand the rules of the game, but he sure seemed to comprehend Charlie’s innuendo.

It’s Charlie’s turn to put a left hand on blue and he’s happier than a pig in shit for this twist of fate. He reaches over Shaw’s body, partially covering her, his pelvis dangerously close to her bum.

“Damn, if I don’t have all the luck-”

“Don’t be a creep, Holloway,” Vickers muttered.

Now, the Engineer is pacing.

Janek begins another round and an impossible spin is dealt to David- or so they thought. In an almost acrobatic display he moves one foot underneath the other.

“Aww no fucking fair!” Charlie whines, “ Sir Synthesis over there is cheating!”

“Dr. Holloway, I am merely using my advantages,” David replies, “ but how sad that, even in your current position, you still have none.”

Janek snorts, but quickly covers it with a cough.

The game goes on.

And, unfortunately for Shaw, her spin backs her right into Charlie.

“If you say one bloody word…”she warns him.

However, he doesn't have time to respond because the Engineer is now charging towards their tangled bodies, rage in his eyes.

Charlie gulps and speaks cautiously, “David, what does he want?”

David, from his pretzel-like position, speaks to the Engineer in his language. A deep,booming voice replies, complete with animated hand gestures.

David grins, clearly amused.

“He… he thinks this is some sort of sexual tryst- maybe even foreplay, if you adjust the translation for our language.”

“Eew, no, never!” Shaw declares in disgust, her shoulder shuddering and bumping into Charlie. He loses his balance and topples over, taking Shaw with him.

The Engineer gently lifts Shaw off the mat and leaves Charlie, and his wounded ego, in a heap.

David turns back to him and begins another indecipherable speech. This time, the Engineer’s eyes go wide and a hint of a smile curls the corner of his lips. In perhaps the most elegant and speedy of maneuvers he pulls the Twister mat out from under them.

David maintains perfect balance like china whose tablecloth has been ripped from beneath it. Charlie is dumped unceremoniously onto the floor.

“OUCH! What the fuck was that for?!

Two large and rapid paces forward bring the Engineer to Janek. He plucks the spin board from his hands. With the mat draped over the same arm, he makes his way back to Shaw, takes her hand, and leads her out of the room with some degree of urgency.

“What just happened?” Janek asks in confusion.

“Well, our guest thought this was some sort of mating ritual,” David divulges, “and I simply told him not how we are playing at present.”

“What do you mean ‘at present’, David?” There was a menacing tone to Charlie’s voice.

David, in a very tranquil way, arches his torso back and sighs.

“I also shared that when played naked it-”

Charlie has never moved so fast in his life. He’s up off the ground and flying down the hall, sneakers squeaking with speed.

“Shaw! Shaw! WAIT!”

“Think he’ll catch up with them?” Janek asks.

“If she's smart, she won't answer,” Vickers answers.

“I should return to Med Bay,” David mumbles, untangling himself with ease.

“Why is that?”

“Shaw might need a muscle relaxer after all the Twisting she's about to do.”

Note: I did not intend for this to have a suggestive ending- the only sexual undertone was going to be the Engineer mistaking this for a sexual game. However, once again, my love for the Big Guy controlled my writing. Someday, I'll steer away from this...

Just not today!

[niuniente]

YES THAT'S THE THING! The only negative thing I have heard about Buffy since it started airing in the late 90's is that Buffy always goes back to Angel, no matter what, and it can get boring.

After all, this is an extremely popular series. A cult classic. It has won lots of prizes and gotten nominations. Has gotten books, comics, a movie. Angel even got his own series!

And here I am, not believing what I'm seeing because the writing just sucks SO BAD AND MAKES NO SENSE and no, you can't say it's because the series is old.

This all is happening in S5. There have been inklings over the course that this series is indeed made by a man, because only a man would write romance or women like that. Nothing super big, just slightly annoying like "oh my god, no woman would actually think or do that".

The problem in S5 is that the series/creator clearly can't either understand what a healthy devotion is OR/AND can't commit to write Spike in one way only. He constantly contradicts himself without any given reason, which in this case would only be a severe mental health issue.

Spike is pictured as this lovesick puppy who would do anything for Buffy, a bit shy and really taking his time to gather his courage to confess his feelings, and who is also making sure that his actions won't hurt Buffy or her family, even if it would hurt or kill him. Like, this soft, gentle, sensitive man who will do anything to keep his lover safe and would never harm them in anyway. Every mother's dream son-in-law.

But Spike is also, at the very same time, pictured from this male perspective of a lovesick man; oh, isn't it romantic how he steals Buffy's clothes to smell them, has built an altar for her, has a Buffy mannequin at his crypt he treats violently when he gets angry, stalks her around her home because he can't help his feelings, how Spike asks her current girlfriend to roleplay Buffy in bedroom because otherwise he doesn't want to have sex with her, how he commissions this personal Buffy sex toy for his own pleasure and orgasms only, and how he kidnaps Buffy and tells Buffy he kills her if he can't have her? Oh, what romantic devotion, this man is SO in LOVE!

AND HE KEEPS GOING BACK AND FORTH! THIS EPISODE, HE WANTS TO KILL BUFFY. NEXT EPISODE HE ALMOST GETS KILLED HIMSELF BECAUSE HE WOULD NEVER ALLOW ANYTHING BAD TO HAPPEN TO BUFFY. WELL NOW HE STALKS BUFFY AND WANTS HER FOR HIMSELF ONLY, BUT NO, WAIT, HE'S ACTUALLY PROTECTING BUFFY'S FAMILY BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO BRING ANY SADNESS TO BUFFY.

Like, who the hell is he? Do you want him to be the every woman's dream man or every woman's nightmare? He can't be both at the same time, not without an explanation and no, him being a vampire and sensitive isn't a valid explanation for such drastic differences.

And BUFFY? Sweet lord, Buffy! She's all just "eew, no" about this whole ordeal of having an obsessive man who has killed two Slayers (and is apparently the only vampire who has ever won against a Slayer) after her. No worry in the world. No concern that this man could kill or rape her, or hurt her family in his temper tantrum? Just scolds him by saying "gross" and "leave me alone".

And here I thought the biggest issue for the upcoming Buffy and Spike romance would be Angel's existence.

Of course, the series is probably going to brush all this freaky stuff off like "Nah, never happened and look, he was just so desperately in love and Buffy is so very strong she is not afraid of anyone and has no sense of self-protection as a woman".

I just don't understand how this level of character writing is considered even remotely plausible, not to mention something to be celebrated as an excellent cult classic?

Maybe it's just the Season 5. Maybe I'm just too old. And too sad. I just want better for Buffy and Spike, separately and together.

EDIT: OK TURNS OUT THE CREATOR OF THE SERIES HATED SPIKE AND HIS ACTOR FOR MAKING SPIKE A FAN FAVORITE AND RUINING HIS ARTISTIC PLANS, AND THAT THE CREATOR IS BASICALLY JUST A MAN SIZE WALKING DICK. A clear attempt to make fans hate Spike in S5 writing.

[suddencolds]

Fool Me Twice [3/?]

I had a stressful week and was sort of considering dropping/discontinuing this fic, but then I ended up having fun writing this part last night :’) So here’s part 3—definitely a little different from what I usually write (and I was a little bold with certain decisions, haha). Enjoy! 

Part 3 ft. fake dating, a New Year’s celebration, drunken decisions, implied/referenced contagion (maybe)

You can read Part 1 [here]! (No additional context is needed aside from the previous 2 parts).

—

Margot’s decorated the bathroom nicely— a glass soap dispenser, tied with a singular golden ribbon that seems—intentionally or not—in theme with the decorations outside; a small, fluffy blue rug; a shower curtain lined with silhouettes of raindrops, and one of those scented reed diffusers, scented like bamboo and lemongrass. Neither of which he’s allergic to, to his knowledge, but with this cold, any small push is enough to send him over the—

“hhEH… hehh’IIZSCHEEW!”

The sneeze does nothing—or close to nothing—to relieve the tickle in his nose. Yves desperately hopes that the walls are more soundproof than they appear to be. He reaches blindly for the roll of toilet paper, if only to have something to cover the resounding—

“hEHh… hEH-hHEh-! hhhEH’iTSSCH-Eew! Snf-! hEHH… HEHh’iIZSCHEEw!” 

The sneezes scrape unpleasantly against his throat, enough that he coughs a little, after. He blows his nose into the handful of toilet paper and finds, even after, that his nose is still practically dripping. His excuse to Erika had been nothing more than that—an excuse—but he’s starting to feel as if this bathroom excursion was necessary in more ways than one.

The cold medicine from earlier is certainly starting to wear off, if the congestion settling in his sinuses is anything to go by. He’s tired, even though it isn’t especially late, and his throat is undoubtedly sorer than it had been before he got here. On top of everything with Erika, it feels like insult to injury. 

Erika. Where would he even begin with her? Now—knowing that she wants to be friends with him still—what can he do? Has anything she’s said tonight merited his forgiveness? Even if she hadn’t meant to cheat on him—even if she’d been planning to break up with him formally, even if she’d only made out with Brendon because she was drunk—does that make any of this permissible? She still lied to him. That night, when she’d gone to the party, she’d told him that she was just visiting a relative. The only reason why Yves had found her there with Brendon—the only reason why he’d shown up at the party at all—was because he’d been dropping something off for a friend.

She might not have chosen to cheat on him. But she’d still chosen to get drunk with someone she knew she had feelings for. Is that really any better?

And there’s this, too—part of Yves wants to forgive her. Part of him wants to move past everything, if only it means he’ll get to keep her as a friend. There was a point where she was everything to him, and maybe a friendship would be second best to everything if it meant he’d get to keep talking to her. That version of her that he remembers, walking with him through the 5am dark to crew practice, leaning into his shoulder.

Yves turns on the sink, lets the cold water wash over his hands for a few seconds before he cups his hands together to splash some water on his face. For reasons other than the cold water, his eyes sting. He shouldn’t have come here, he thinks. Seeing Erika again, after everything, feels like reopening a wound that had only started to close up.

Or maybe that isn’t right. Maybe he’s not over her at all.

From the other side of the door, he hears a sharp knock.

“I’ll - snf-! - be out in a sec,” he says. “I thidk Margot has adother bathroom if you need to go.” One that he hasn’t just sneezed in, notably.

“Do you need anything?”

It’s Vincent.

It occurs to Yves, all of a sudden, what an asshole he’s been. He’s the entire reason why Vincent is here in the first place, and here he is, locked in the bathroom, leaving Vincent alone at a party he wouldn’t enjoy to socialize with people he doesn’t know.

But what can he say? He’s far from presentable, right now—with the large, glossy bathroom mirror in front of him to confirm it—his face flushed, his hair a mess. There’s no way he can open the door, as it stands, and let Vincent see him like this.

“I could… hEHh… hEHh’iIIZSCHEEW! snf-! Ugh, I could use a dridk right ndow,” he says instead, which is more honest than he intends, except then he remembers he’s not supposed to be drinking. “Wait, fuck. I still have to drive.”

“I can do it,” Vincent says, “If you trust me with your car. I wasn’t planning on drinking.” 

“I do trust you with my car,” Yves says. 

“What do you want? Champagne? A beer?”

“Whatever you find that will get mbe idtoxicated the fastest.” It’s half a joke.

“So you can wake up tomorrow with a hangover to go with your cold?”

“Hodestly? I can’t think of a better start to the ndew year,” Yves says.

A pause. “If it’s what you want.” It’s an easier victory than he’d expected—he supposes he can’t complain. He listens as Vincent’s footsteps recede.

He shuts the water off. Runs a hand through his hair, fixes some of the strands back in place. Blows his nose again, for good measure. His face is a little flushed—probably a telltale sign that he has a fever—but if he drinks, who will notice?

Vincent is back a couple minutes later. He knocks with the same, curt knock as before, and this time, Yves opens the door.

He’s standing there, looking no less charming than before, holding a cocktail glass. There’s an orange slice on the edge, and an elegantly placed sprig of rosemary—Margot’s doing, probably.

“Vodka and orange juice,” he says, by way of explanation. “Margot said it’s called a screwdriver.”

“She’s really committed to the orange juice,” Yves says, and takes the glass from him. “Thadks, snf! I’m sorry for disappearing on you.”

Vincent looks like he’s about to say something more. Yves braces himself for the questioning, but instead, Vincent turns away. “It’s fine.”

“And sorry about Erika,” Yves says. He thinks he sounds a little less congested now that he’s blown his nose—at least, for the time being.  “It’s just—it’s been awhile since I’ve seen her. But that doesn’t mbean—i mean, I don’t wadt you to have to worry about all of this.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” “I just want you to edjoy the party,” Yves says. “Well, as much as you can, adyways. I can handle myself.”

“I never doubted that,” Vincent says.

“That’s why you’re the perfect pretend boyfriend.” Yves tips his drink back, takes a couple large, indulgent sips. He doesn’t catch Vincent’s expression as they take their seats again at the dinner table.

“You’re back,” Erika says. “I was starting to think you were planning on camping out in the bathroom for the rest of the night.”

“Yeah, it’s quite the complicated bathroom,” Yves says. “Thankfully Vincent was there to show me the way out.”

The rest of dinner is surprisingly uneventful—or maybe Yves is too tipsy to pick up on Erika’s passive aggression. Either way, he finds himself actually enjoying himself through the haze of the screwdriver and a few glasses of champagne. It helps that Erika hasn’t brought up the whole friend thing again, and it helps that Margot stops by a few times, whenever the conversation lulls, to change the subject to something utterly unrelated to his breakup. Yves isn’t sure how much of a role Vincent has to play in that. At some point—halfway through another sneezing fit—Vincent wordlessly gets him a stack of napkins, and Yves is not embarrassed enough to pretend he doesn’t need them at all.

After dinner and dessert (which Yves would usually help with, on the many occasions when he doesn’t have a cold, but which Margot does a perfectly impressive job with), everyone disperses again. Yves catches up with everyone he knows from college, introduces Vincent to them (“Don’t tell Vincent I said this,” he says, “But I think he’s way too smart to be on our team,” and Vincent laughs and modestly denies this), and wonders what he’ll tell them all when, inevitably, Vincent doesn’t show up to any of their future meetups. At some point in the future, Vincent will find someone, presumably, who he’ll spend every subsequent New Year’s with. Yves is a little too drunk to think about the slight pang in his stomach when he considers this.

It’s only when it’s nearing midnight that he finds himself out on Margot’s balcony with Vincent.

It’s a nice view of the city, with its rows and rows of glittering skyscrapers. Yves leans out on the railing. 

The alcohol has done its job of making him feel pleasantly warm indoors, but it’s too cold outside for it to have the same effect. He doesn’t realize he’s shivering until Vincent says, “Are you too cold?”

“No,” Yves says, crossing his arms in an attempt to keep himself from shivering. “It’s… ndot that… cold out—hh-! hHehh’IIZSCHh-EEW!” Ugh. Very convincing.“That was bad timing, snf-!, I swear.”

“Bad timing, I’m sure,” Vincent says, his tone soft. “We can go inside if you want.”

“No,” Yves says, rubbing his nose. “It’s nicer out here, snf-! Also, I’m sure there will be fireworks at mbidnight. Which is soon.”

“So you’re taking the best vantage point all for yourself,” Vincent says.

“Yes, I— hHh-hHEH-!” He thinks it might culminate in another sneeze, but the tickle in his nose dissipates, very frustratingly, at last possible moment. “I got here first,” Yves says, sniffling. “Finders, keepers.”

“In that case,” Vincent says. Then—in lieu of finishing that sentence—he unbuttons his blazer and drapes it over Yves’s shoulders. 

Yves stares at him, disbelieving. The blazer is still warm—indulgently, comfortably warm—from Vincent’s shoulders. “There’s no way you’re not cold wearing that,” he says, gesturing to Vincent’s button-down shirt. It’s long-sleeved—a small consolation—but with fabric that thin, there’s really no chance he’s dressed warmly enough for this weather.

It’s starting to snow again—lightly enough that the snow melts into water when it hits the ground.

Vincent shrugs. “I grew up here. I’m used to it.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Okay,” Yves says, pulling the jacket closer. “Thadks.”

Inside, almost everyone who hasn’t left has gathered in the living room. Someone—Mikhail, maybe—is telling a story to the crowd, to raucous laughter. Then, after a bit, Margot says something, lifting her glass of champagne, and everyone joins her in counting down. Ten. Nine.

“Erika’s watching,” Vincent says, after a beat. Eight. Yves turns and sees that he’s right—he spots her somewhere in the crowd, in her sleek blue dress. When she catches him looking, she waves. Seven. Six. “She’ll probably be expecting us to kiss.”

Yves looks away from her to look at Vincent. Vincent, who’s here just because Yves asked him to be, who looks unfairly attractive even in something as forgettable as a white button-down shirt, who Yves will probably never have another chance to spend a night with again. The question is out of his mouth before he can think twice about it.

“Can we?”

He almost bites his tongue after. What is he thinking? It’s a ludicrous request—something absolutely unfitting to ask from a coworker, especially when he has a cold—and he’s certain he would never have asked it if he were sober. He opens his mouth to apologize, to explain himself, but—

Two. One.

Vincent leans in, briefly, and kisses him.

Beyond them, fireworks shatter into the sky. There’s the sound of cheering in the living room. 

The kiss lasts only a moment before Yves is wrenching himself away, taking a couple hurried steps back before his head snaps forward with a sudden, spraying—

“Hhehh’IIDSCHiiEW!”

—which, despite his efforts, almost certainly mists Vincent’s collar. It’s enough of a warning for him to lift his hand to his face and twist away to cover the subsequent—

“hHEH… Hheh’yISSCHEew! Snf-! Heh… hheh-!! Hheh… HEHh’iiDDZSChiEw!”

He feels heat creep up into his cheeks.  “I’mb so sorry,” he says, and means it for everything—for the untimely sneeze, for the kiss, for inviting Vincent to the party in the first place. “That was… I’mb really sorry. Oh, god, I really hope you don’t catch this. I would feel awful if you caught this.” His head swims, and he finds himself grabbing the railing to steady himself, muffling a fit of harsh, grating coughs into his hand. Usually, it would be his sleeve, but given that the sleeve he has on now belongs to Vincent’s very nice blazer, his options are limited.

Yves leans his weight onto the railing, sniffling, and shuts his eyes against the dizziness. He might be drunker than he’d given himself credit for. 

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Vincent says. Yves doesn’t want to look at him, doesn’t want to see what he might be thinking. He really, really owes Vincent for all of this. “Are you tired?”

“Just a little drunk,” Yves answers. “We should probably head home soon.” 

“Okay,” Vincent says.

The apartment is indulgently warm when they step back inside. Yves hands Vincent back his jacket and lingers in the living room to say goodbye to Margot (he has the pleasure of watching her hug Vincent for the second time tonight) and to the handful of college friends that he recognizes. It’s a short walk to the car through the snow—just a few minutes, except he finds it to be more of a tedious walk than expected, and Vincent has to grab his arm a couple times to keep him from stumbling.

“Careful,” he says sternly, the first time.

Yves stares at him, tries to think about what sober Yves would say. He’s always been a little too honest when drunk.

“You are a godsend,” he says. “Thanks for coming todight. I kdow you hate parties.”

“I don’t hate parties. Are you always like this when you’re drunk?”

“Like what?”

Vincent laughs—a short, soft laugh which Yves wishes he could hear more of. “This is the fifth time you’ve thanked me.”

Is it really? “Ndo, I just am… hEH-!” Yves twists away from Vincent, just in time to let out a barely covered— 

“hehh’IZZSCHH-iIEW! Snf!” The sneeze jerks him forward, harsh—and loud—enough that he feels a twinge of pain in his throat. Luckily, Vincent won’t be here tomorrow to see him lose his voice. 

“Bless you,” Vincent says, reflexively.

“That’s definitely ndot the fifth time you’ve blessed me,” Yves says. “It’s more than that for sure. So I’mb allowed to thadk you more than once.”

“If you put it that way.”

Vincent drives him home. Yves directs the GPS to his address and tries to stay awake so he can talk to him, until Vincent says, “If you’re tired, you should sleep,” which Yves wants to protest. It seems rude to fall asleep in his own car when he’s supposed to be the one driving in the first place. But maybe Vincent is tired, too, from having had to socialize with strangers all night, and maybe silence would be preferable to him now. So Yves leans his head against the passenger seat window and shuts his eyes.

It feels like he’s only been asleep for a minute before Vincent taps him on the shoulder.

“We’re here,” he says, pulling the keys from the ignition.

“That was fast,” Yves says. He muffles a small cough into his sleeve. “Thadks again for driving me. I’mb sorry we stayed out so late.” He checks his watch—it’s close to 1am. It occurs to him that he has no idea if Vincent is a morning person, if this is considered late by his standards. If he’s tired, too.

“It’s no problem,” Vincent says, stifling a yawn into his hand. Well, that answers his question.

Yves unbuckles his seatbelt, opens the passenger door, and gets out. It’s brutally cold out, cold enough that he has to fight back a shiver. “At least wait inside as I call you an Uber?” “You don’t have to do that.”

But Yves is already pulling out his phone, scrolling through their messages for Vincent’s address. It’s the least he can do, after everything.

Vincent waits inside with him for a few minutes. It’s a bit of a wait for his ride—probably everyone’s trying to get back home from their New Year’s parties at this time—so Yves makes them both some hot chocolate (nothing fancy, given the time constraints—just hot cocoa mix with some cinnamon and steamed milk—but Yves says “You should come again some time, I promise I can actually cook when I have more than three minutes”) and sits with him in the living room. He finds himself almost disappointed when the cab finally arrives.

“Get home safe,” Yves says.

“Thanks,” Vincent says. “I will.”

“And Vincent?” Vincent turns.

There’s a hundred things Yves wants to say to him. He wants to say, you didn’t have to do this. He wants to say, I don’t know what I would’ve done without you. He wants to say, how can I make it up to you?

“Happy New Year,” he says, instead, and Vincent smiles.

[ Part 4 ]

[alarrytale]

Hello Marte! It´s the anon who brought the tea talk. Thank you for understanding me, of course I didn´t mixed up his redbullvodka//beer with tea lol - like who would put hot tea into transparent plastic cup made for cold drinks anyway haha? In front of his mic stand were bottle of water and his alcoholic drink and in the back near drums was his tea cup. I was watching livestream (where I noticed he was couching) and later checked one (quite popular on IG) larrie who was there in person and she wrote that he was mixing those drinks and even posted a video where Louis took a sip from his plastic cup and then went to drums to take a sip of his tea. I am also amused how the discussions turned to the way how Louis tans haha! Since we know H has no problem with nudity at home (hope I remember it correctly like someone said it and it´s not only a fans made headcanon) and Louis said himself that he sleeps naked, my headcanon is that they tan naked in their garden. Or have you seen what H done with his swim trunks in Italy last year when famously premiered everyone his O tattoo (eew)? That´s also a way how they both might tan. But neither of them have tan lines so... Btw have you read that famous fic Escapade? I am reading it now finally and oh my oh my, it´s so damn sexy and I am still at the beginning. It caught me so much that I seriously considering taking a day off at work to spend whole day reading it lol. And last thing, rumour said that H was spotted in Manchester. Niall has a show there tonight in that "famous" arena that H is an investor (or maybe he co-owns it, idk now). What if H will be Niall´s special guest tonight? Like it will make so much sense and it will bring some good attention to that arena since it has been very problematic but also to H as well. I am manifesting because I need to see them together and I need solo harries fumming that H supported his brother and the captain of the larry ship.

Hi, anon!

No worries, i got you! I love that you think H and L are nude tanning at home!

And of course (i golf, i fuck old men for a living) i've read Escapade! Enjoy it, it's a good one!

Unpopular opinion maybe, but i don't want any of the 1D guys to appear on stage together if it's just two of them. All or none for me, thanks! I wouldn't mind H being there to watch and support him though. That would be nice!

[laura-the-yellow-cat]

MSA X DP: The Ultimate Enemy Chapter 5: Clockwork shows pictures of what happened to Danny's, Sophie's, Dan's Families and Friends of Alternate Universes to killed/Danny, Sophie, Dan is going to High Schools

**after the battle of Danny, Sophie and Dan fights Box Lunch**

Box Lunch: Prepare for... Huh?

Danny: **singing** Box Lunch, **Raising one finger, he sends a focused beam at the Nasty Packet** BEWARE!

The Nasty Sauce packet swells then explodes, kicking Danny, Sophie and Dan through the wall and blowing the top off the Nasty Burger. Outside, a crowd of people look on, Lancer and other teachers in front. He raises his briefcase to shield his face from the flying debris, and a sauce-splattered Danny falls through it, intangible, to land next to Sam, Monty, Elise and Tucker Irving stumbles through the front door. Lancer and other teachers lowers his briefcase

Lancer: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance! Run!

Screaming, everyone but the trio runs

Tucker: Danny, who was that ghost you three were fighting?

Elise: Yeah?

Sophie: I think She's the daughter of the Box Ghost and the Lunch Lady, Box Lunch

Dan: Yeah

Elise, Tucker, Sam and Monty: Yikes

Danny: Actually, it's more of an eew. I don't know what's going on. **Looking down, he notices the CW medallion on the ground** But this medallion might give us a clue -- **He suddenly notices there is something stuck to his back, and peels it away. It's the C.A.T. answer packet** Oh my gosh, The answers to the C.A.T.s!

Sophie: Wow

Others: Oh my goodness

Clockwork: **watching the screen intently and gesturing** Now watch this. He'll make the right choice. And you'll see, you've got absolutely nothing to...

Danny: Hello, great future

Sophie: I love the great future

Dan: ???

Tucker: You're not actually thinking of peeking at the answers, are you?

Elise: or not?

Danny: Of course I am. **He reverts to human form** Aren't you?

Ghost Present: Phew...

Ghost Past: That was close

The Cloaked Hood 1 (Muffet Pepper's unknown father; ghost): If only muffet pepper was there with us

The Cloaked Hood 2 (Muffet Pepper's unknown mother; ghost): Me too

Clockwork's wide-eyed stare drops into a scowl

Observant 1: They's stolen the test answers

Observant 2: They's clearly going to cheat!

Observant 1 and Observant 2: They has your time medallion

Clockwork: You said that twice **switches to child form**

Observant 1: Destroy him now, Clockwork

The Cloaked Hood 1 and The Cloaked Hood 2 (Muffet Pepper's unknown parents; ghosts): **gasp**

Switching back to adult form, Clockwork sticks his hand in the opening of another gear

Clockwork: I know what I'm doing [The gear opening and his hand glow, and the opening resolves to a view of a robotic ghost] He put the answers to the test in his hands, and he made the wrong decision

Ghost Present: This is not right...

Ghost Past: (in her mind: Oh muffet, if only you were here)

In the viewer, we see the smoking wreck of the Nasty Burger. The viewer zooms closer, showing an exposed heating element by the Nasty Sauce tanks. The heat meter moves up to yellow. Clockwork punches a button on his staff, making the viewer go to static. It shows a still shot of Danny, Sophie and Dan fighting the robot ghost, then fighting his evil older self. It then shows his family and friends and Mr. Lancer bound and gagged with ectoenergy in the Nasty Burger, which then explodes, and Danny, Sophie and Dan shielding themselves against the blast then screaming "nooo!" Clockwork floats up in front of the viewer

Clockwork: [In old form] Their future is sealed

Ghost Present: (in his mind: Not good... they need them what they want...)

Ghost Past: Yeah... We'll see...

---COMMERCIAL BREAK---

At their schools The trio are walking down the hall

Sam: So, are you going to return the test answers or not?

Monty: Yeah?

Danny: We will! We will. I'm just...waiting for the right moment.

Sophie: Yeah, me too

Dan: Me three

Tucker: Like, maybe, after the test?

Elise: ???

Danny, Sophie and Dan frowns at Tucker

Tucker: Yeah, you're right. [As they pass by the teachers' lounge] You're not thinking about cheating on a test that you're convinced will determine your future

The door to the teacher's lounge opens, and Lancer looks after them quizzically. Shutting the door again, he goes to the sofa and sets the briefcase down on the coffee table. He pulls out a key and unlocks the briefcase, and gasps upon finding it empty,The scene goes to several Casper High, Mighty Falcon and University School girls and boys looking angry as Jazz, Arthur and Jane talks

Jazz: So, it's a choice between Harvard, Yale, and Stanford, and I can't make up my mind! [The girls and boys all turn and walk away, and Jazz's smile drops.] So...see you after school? No?

Arthur: I think that did not help

Jane: Yeah, i don't they don't like you're idea or something

Lancer: [walking up to Jazz, Arthur and Jane] Ms. Fenton, Mr Kingsmen and Ms Turner, may I speak with you three after school?

Jazz, Arthur and Jane looks alarmed

Scene shifts to FentonWorks at night. In Danny's room, the trio are sitting in a circle on the floor around Clockwork's medallion. Tucker connects a pair of wires from it to his PDA

Tucker: I can't seem to hack into it. It's really hi-tech

Elise: Yeah?

Sam: Yeah, like it's from the future or something

Monty: I agreed with Sam

Well, speaking of the future, I think it's time I started preparing for mine. [Picks up his backpack and stands]

Sophie: Or mine [Picks up her backpack and stands]

Sam: You both mean cheat

Sophie: What? No, that's insane

Danny: Yeah, We didn't say cheat

Tucker: You both didn't say "not" cheat

Elise: Yeah, u didn't say like that

Danny: [facepalming] Guys, come on. I'd love to have spent the last month studying, but We was fighting ghosts! Besides, if you four think this test is so meaningless [pulling out the answer packet and holding it up], why do you even care if I cheat? Why shouldn't I open this up and study the answers, huh?

Sophie: Yeah. right? hehehe...

Elise, Tucker, Sam and Monty look at each other

Danny: No answer? [Putting the packet on his dresser] Well that's all the answer We need [He looks down at the packet, hesitating]

Sophie: I agree with Danny [She looks down at the packet, hesitating]

Tucker: [To Sam] Aren't you going to say something?

Elise: Yeah, or not?

Sam: I'm his friend, not his mom. [Giving Danny a dirty look] If they wants to cheat, they can cheat

Danny, Sophie and Dan is still hesitating. Finally he goes for the seal and peels it up, but is interrupted by a blue light behind them. Tucker and Elise gapes and Sam and Monty gasps. The robot ghost seen earlier in Clockwork's viewscreen appears again. It's a combination of Skulker and Technus, with Skulker's head in the typical head spot and Technus's face embedded in its chest.

Sam, Monty, Elisa and Tucker: [sigh in relief] I mean... Oh no, a ghost!

Danny, Sophie and Dan goes ghost and leaps at the ghost, who easily backhands him into the wall. He slides to the floor and glares up.

Danny: Who are you supposed to be?

Sophie: Who are u?

Skulktech (Skulker): I am Skulktech 9.9, the future Ghost World's greatest hunter!

Skulktech (Technus): With its greatest technovillain as his operating system!

Danny, Sophie and Dan: Skulker and Technus together?

Tucker Is that an ew or a yikes?

Elise: or both?

Several claw-ended arms spring out of Skulktech

Danny: Definitely a yikes.

Sophie: I think yikes

Dan: Yeah, yikes

For @sfcabanasstarcgs and @mysteryideasgroup

All her msa ocs and new msa ocs belongs to @sfcabanasstarcgs and @mysteryideasgroup

All my msa ocs and new msa ocs belongs to Me

All Danny Phantom characters belongs to Nickelodeon Danny Phantom

[mayalaen]

they make my brain hurt

Asshole Cousin just got two “Supernatural” tattoos.

The reason it’s in quotes is because my poser of a cousin never does even the tiniest bit of research before getting something permanent done, so BOTH tattoos are wrong.

One is the leviathan cross and she didn’t have it filled in and the bars are wrong.

The second one is Azazel’s sigil/summoning circle. Nope, you read that right. It’s not one or the other but instead it’s both because she saw the sigil and saw the summoning circle and split the difference to make something that is neither.

Somebody must have already called her on it and so now she’s saying “it’s the ancient version of Azazel’s sigil.”

Which still isn’t right because Supernatural was using Agrippa’s sigil of Saturn as Azazel’s sigil for some reason, and the tattoo she has is none of the above.

But that’s just how she is.

Wanna know AC’s dream vacation?

To go to Salem, Oregon so she can see where the Salem Witch Trials happened. She’s wanted to go there since she was a kid yet never even bothered to read anything about it. Like what state it’s in.

Wanna know what’s tattooed on the back of her hand?

A 7-legged spider with the wrong month and day of her dad’s motorcycle accident when he got his traumatic brain injury. She didn’t even bother asking anybody in the family what the date was.

Wanna know who she named her son after?

No one because she was trying to name him after a “cool vampire on TV” and even after I told her the correct spelling of the name when she was 8 months pregnant she STILL misspelled the name.

And when I asked AC and husband if they were interested in learning about the extremely old Irish name they were naming their son after, her husband replied “Eew Irish? No I hate that shit. It’s a vampire name!”

AC married the perfect man because he’s got a tattoo of an anime girl on his arm. It’s supposed to be a specific character from an anime they both love, but it’s not even the character they’re saying it is.

His girl has dark hair and the real one is blonde. She’s holding a weapon from a completely different anime.

I haven’t said anything to her. If people wanna do shit like that it’s up to them. I just find it funny.

AC doesn’t even know I’m into Supernatural 😝

[autistic-crypt1d]

The X-Files Live Blogging:

Season 7

Ok so I may have not realized I finished Season 6 until episode 7 and had to go back and take all my notes from that and put them here, ANYWAY

Seasons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 1998 movie, 6

Updates:

- The Sixth Extinction

- ow ow ow, Skinner visiting him ow ow ow

- oh???

- this lore is getting wild

- Skinner acts like Scully and Mulder's dad no one can tell me otherwise

- I do not like those sounds wtf is that

- PFFFT LET'S GO SCULLY

- oh what the hell

- wtf is this woman on about

- I forgot about the whole Krycek having the ability to kill Skinner at any time thing

- The Sixth Extinction: Amor Fati

- ow 😭

- so he is his father??? We're getting confirmation???

- he's alive?!?!?!

- wtf is happening

- Scully he warned you wtf are you doing

- wow that old man makeup is ROUGH

- what is he doing?? Wtf is this surgery??

- "you were my touchstone, my constant" "and you are mine" AHHHHH

- Hungry

- asshole

- wtf is this dude

- WTF

- this is so sad y'all, he doesn't wanna hurt anyone :(

- Rob no, please buddy don'ttttt

- ah man :(

- owie :(

- ya know, i feel like I've seen this episode before, maybe it came on tv when i was a kid or something

- Millennium

- sir why are you taking off your clothes

- wtf

- huh???

- so is this a thing where the members committed so the couldn't be a part of something but now this dude is resurrecting them to finish it or something?

- ah ok nvm they did it to go with the plan

- uh oh

- HUH?!?!?

- AHHHHHHHHH THEY KISSED THEY KISSED THEY KISSED

- Rush

- interesting

- ahhhh he's got super speed

- oh shit

- oh not dead!

- :(

- The Goldberg Variation

- I keep wanting to call him Murray because of that Stargate episode where Teal'c is going by Murray

- this episode is really cool

- I love this guy

- IS HE DEAD???

- ok not dead thank god

- awww it worked out!!!

- Orison

- not this dude again

- ugh

- GET HIM GIRL, BEAT HIS ASS!!!

- bro just kill him!!!

- OH WHAT THE HELL

- GIRL GET YOUR GUN

- GET HIM SCULLY

- YEAH SCULLY LET'S GO!!!

- FUCK, MULDER GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS

- MULDERRRRRR

- GIRL WHAT'RE YOU GONNA DO WITH A GUN IF YOUR HANDS ARE TIED GET FREE!!!

- YES SCULLY

- SHOOT HIM MULDER

- SHOOT HIM

- YES SCULLYYYYY

- finally omfg

- The Amazing Maleeni

- oh dear

- huh???

- Signs and Wonders

- ah yes, stay in the car with the snakes. Don't get out or anything, just shoot them in close quarters

- get your hands off Scully!!

- this guy is a fucking monster

- WHAT THE FUCK

- oh what the hell

- Sein Und Zeit

- oh wtf

- I am very confused

- WHAT?!?!

- I'm really confused. Wasn't she taken by the dudes from that organization to be given to the aliens?

- ow :(

- oh god is this actually what happened to her? This is horrible:(

- Closure

- ow ow ow

- this dude is giving me major creeps

- oh???

- who's Jeffery? Is that Agent Spender's first name? I feel like it was but I can't remember

- ahhh ok yeah it was

- what the fuuuuuck

- OW OW OW

- BRO OWWWWW 😭

- guys stop I'm gonna cry

- GUYS, GUYS HELP THIS IS SO SAD

- GUYS SHE'S DEAD 😭

- GUYS 😭

- X-Cops

- wow hello tone shift!

- WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING

- this is so funky I love it

- PFFFT SCULLY DUCKING BEHIND THE DOOR

- aw Ricky :(

- pffft I love those gay dudes

- aww Mulder shielding her :(

- ahhh this thing takes the form of people's nightmare creatures??

- oh what the fuck XD

- "oh god, more of you??" PFFFT

- that look XD

- oh fuck

- uhhhh ok I guess

- First Person Shooter

- oh what the hell

- why is there a fucking dominatrix

- bro is gonna die isn't he

- yup

- different lady this time

- it's a video game, can't they just delete the code?

- eew, way to be professional.

- Mulder stop being gross

- uh oh

- omfg Mulder

- Mulder don't be stupid

- what the fuck

- Mulder you look so damn stupid in those glasses

- "no fair picking on a girl" Scully. Girl. Not very feminist of you.

- LET'S GO SCULLY!!!! SAVE HIS ASS!!!

- Theef

- PFFFT THAT TITLE

- this is so cute and wholesome I'm scared

- uh oh

- aw man :(

- the title is less funny now that it's written on the wall in blood

- he's not allowed to cook in his apartment??

- uh oh

- oh god her body is in his apartment isn't it

- ah hell she's gonna find it and he's gonna kill her isn't he

- yep aaaand yep

- hey you better leave Scully alone mf

- En Ami

- you've gotta be kidding me

- interesting

- oop Mulder figured it out already

- uh oh

- 118????

- uh oh

- WHATCHYA DOIN

- WHAT THE FUCK

- I can't tell what cancer man's intentions are and it's stressing me out

- Scully looks beautiful tho

- I DON'T UNDERSTAND HIS INTENTIONS I'M SO CONFUSED

- he switched it didn't he

- ALL THAT TO THROW IT AWAY?!?!?!?!

- Chimera

- what the fuuuuck

- PFFFT Scully XD

- OH?

- I feel so bad for this woman :(

- oh fuck he was sleeping with the first woman too???

- oh shit it's not her????

- IT'S HER?!?!?!

- All Things

- OH???

- I'm confused, do we know him?

- oh gross they had an affair didn't they

- wtf is going on

- ????

- THE HAIR TUCK OMFG

- what a strange episode

- Brand X

- YUCK

- pfffft I love Mulder's sass

- gross part 2, somehow grosser!

- god I hate this guy so much

- BRO WOUND HIM, SOMETHING!!!

- thank you!

- ?????

- Hollywood A.D.

- wtf

- BRA'TAC?!??!?!

- bruh who cast this mf as Mulder

- PFFFT SKINNER'S FACE

- seriously tho wtf is happening XD

- "sir have I missed you off in a way that's more than normal?" PFFFFT

- all I can say is thank god this dude is an idiot and not an asshole

- bruh wtf

- uhhhh that dude looks exactly like an older Mulder wtf

- BRUH, that dude asking Mulder about his dick while that woman sprints back and forth in the background is killing me XD

- PFFFT THEY'RE BOTH IN THE BATH

- "I appreciate that Skinman" "don't call me that" XD

- WHY ARE THEY ALL IN THE BATH XD

- PFFFFT

- god I love giggly Scully

- Fight Club

- wtf?

- why'd they have her turned around the entire time until that dramatic reveal as if seeing her face is supposed to mean something

- WHY ARE THEIR FACES DIFFERENT

- WTF IS HAPPENING???

- ok I had to rewind to check they never showed their faces until after she went outside

- this is already freaking me out

- they're so cute

- "they could electrocute me quicker!" XD

- she cannot seriously be so dumb that she's printing money onto regular ass paper

- THERE'S TWO OF HIM TOO?????

- I'm sorry but this was such a stupid episode

- Je Souhaite

- there's a body in that rug isn't there

- a living body???

- oh what in the sweet hell

- is that woman he found a damn genie???

- yup

- sounds about right

- Scully is so fucking funny

- god the rug being her version of a lamp is so fucking stupid XD

- poor Scully

- YEESH

- this can only go terribly

- everyone is gone aren't they

- YUP

- OH MY GOD

- ooooo they're watching a movie togetherrrrr

- YES he set her free!!!!

- Requiem

- man Krychek is really never gonna leave is he

- HER SMILE WHEN SHE ASKED IF HE HURT HIM XD

- "let's go waste some money" god this duo has become so chaotic and mischievous since Scully started embracing it and I LOVE IT

- is he fucking smoking a cigarette througha trache tube?!???!

- oh god damn it is that the speed shit again???

- OOOOH I remember him now!!! The X in the road finally made it click for me

- omfg the way Mulder is looking at Scully rn, WOW

- CUDDLES!!!!

- oh crap

- wtf is happening rn

- oh shit Skinner is seeing his first spaceship!!!

- 😭

- HUH?!?!?!?!?!?

- THAT'S THE FINALE?!?!?! BRUH

- Season 8

[bteezxyewriter12]

No More Lies

Pairing- Wooyoung x Named Reader

Word count- 6.9k

Includes- Angst, fight/argument, sex, oral, pussy eating, cum eating, fingering, missionary, riding, multiple orgasms, fluff

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Masterlists 📝ATEEZ Masterlist

📝Wooyoung Masterlist

J POV

I rush down the hallway towards the set where Wooyoung's photoshoot is being held

My best friend, the idol

Lately he's been asking me to come to more and more shoots and I always say yes

He's kept me kinda away from his members so I don't really know any of them too well

I met them the first time about three months ago when I went to a photo shoot

I don't know why he didn't want me to meet them before

He's been in ATEEZ for three years already but he always hung out with me alone

But I'm not making a big deal out of it

I'm just happy he's asking me to come to more things for ATEEZ now

Stepping onto the set, I find him sitting in the middle of the room on a couch with his members

I start heading towards them

"Yeah right", Wooyoung snorts, "I would never fuck Joanne"

I stop a few feet away from him

What did he say?

"Really? You never thought to have sex with your best friend who's a girl?", One of them, I think it's Yeosang, asks

"Eew no. Have you seen her?", Wooyoung answers like he's grossed out

My heart falls to my feet and I quickly hide behind the rack of clothes nearby

"I mean she's nerdy yeah but she's pretty", San says

"Maybe to you. Not me. I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole"

I can't believe he's saying this

It's the opposite of everything he ever said when we're together

"She does seem kind of a dork", Seonghwa adds

"She is totally a dork. All she does is study and she doesn't know how to have any fun"

That's so not true!

Yeah I study a lot but that's because I'm going to be an exotic vet

I need to study

I have hard bio and medical classes

And I do know how to have fun

Him and I have fun all the time

Although now I think he's just been lying to me

"Wooyoung this is your best friend you're talking about!", Hongjoong scolds

He shrugs, "She's my best friend from childhood and honesty I feel sorry for her. It's why I haven't invited her to things up until the past few months"

That's the reason why he's kept me away from his idol world

He's ashamed of me

I feel like I can't breathe

Not only is every he said when we sleep together a lie but it seems like our whole friendship is a lie

"Then you wouldn't care if Jongho asks her out?", Yunho asks

"What?", he says, while I think it

"Jongho likes her. He thinks she's really pretty and nice. He would never ask you if you're ok with him dating her but since you're saying all this, I'm asking for him"

I don't want Jongho

Yes he's very sweet and shy and cute but Wooyoung is who I want

Who I stupidly fell in love with

"She wouldn't know what to do with a guy if she ever did get one", he snaps

I thought I did but I guess all the times he told me I felt good, what I was doing was amazing was a lie

I guess I was just easy sex for him

And it's devastating

"So no I'd never sleep with her. She's kinda pathetic", Wooyoung continues, "And I don't suggest Jongho try either. She has no experience and he'll regret it"

I bite my lip to keep from crying

I guess he regrets it too if he's saying that

"And anyway, I got my eye on Ara. She's hot and I wouldn't mind fucking her."

"God is sex all you think about?", Hongjoong snaps

"No. I think I may ask Ara on a date. See where it goes "

He likes Ara?

One of the hairstylists?

I haven't seen him give any interest in her

He never talks about her to me

But then again I don't really know him anymore

Especially not after this

I need to leave

I can't listen to anymore

I practically run from behind the rack back into the hallway

Going as quickly as I can, I head for the exit, shoving the door open when I get there

I beeline for my car and as soon as I'm in it, the tears burst from my eyes

I can't believe that's how he really thinks of me

He never wanted me

I didn't expect him to have feelings for me but I hoped

I was an idiot

I take out my phone, my hands shaking as I type a text to him

"Hey Woo. I can't make it today. A project was suddenly sprung on us in class and I have to meet with my partner, Han, to talk about how we're going to handle the assignment. Sorry"

After sending the text, I throw my car in drive and head home

I have to keep wiping my eyes because the tears don't stop

I wish I wasn't crying, I wish what he said didn't bother me

Didn't hurt

No such luck

My phone goes off when I open the door to my apartment

"Oh that sucks. I miss you and wanted to hang out after the shoot. Next time then"

I just send back an, "Ok", then head to my room, laying on my bed

Putting my head in my pillow, I let the tears fall, crying my heart out

--------------------------

I stare at my phone

It's been a week since I ran from Wooyoung

A week since I've been pulling away from him

But today he sent me a text asking me to come to another photo shoot tomorrow

I'm not going

I can't be around him right now

Maybe ever

I have to stay away

He doesn't want me

He feels sorry for me and that's why he's continuing this friendship

And he wants Ara

I decided to distance myself more and more

This way he won't be burdened with me and he can go after the girl he really wants

I can let him be happy without any interference from me

I just have to figure out how without causing suspicion

I came up with an idea that's dumb but may still work

"I can't Woo. I actually have a date. With my boyfriend", I text back, hoping he buys it

"Boyfriend? Since when do you have a boyfriend?", he immediately texts back

I already have an answer prepared

"Last week. It's my partner for that projected I had last week. Han. He asked me out that day and I said yes"

"Wow. That's great Jo"

Yeah of course he'd be happy that I have someone else

Now he can ask out Ara without worrying about me

God this fucking hurts

Tears spring to my eyes as I type, "Thanks Woo. He's a really nice guy and I hope it works out"

"It will. Have fun tomorrow 😉"

I send a thumbs up, then toss my phone on my bed, pulling my knees to my chest

He didn't even care

Not one word out what would happen with us

No regret that we can't be together anymore

But then again, what did I expect after I heard what he really thinks about me?

He's probably happy to pass me off to some other guy so he doesn't have to deal with me anymore

It hurts

I didn't only lose the guy I love, I lost my best friend

Who I guess, in reality wasn't my best friend anyway

Or I wasn't his

Laying down in bed, I just stare at the wall, tears falling down my face

🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊🦊

Four months later

Wooyoung POV

"Wanna hang out after work?", I text her, hoping she says yes

I haven't seen her in months

Not since she said she got together with Han

I miss her

And yeah, I get we can't sleep together anymore but that doesn't mean I want all contact to stop

We can still hang out like we used to before sex became involved

And I'm also suspicious that she's lying to me

She uses the Han excuse every time I ask her to hang out

And I ask her often because I miss her

A few times I've seen her out and alone when she's supposedly with Han

Walking into a cafe, alone

Crossing the street to her apartment, alone when she was supposed to be at his place

At her job when she told me she was going to be with him all night

She works in a Starbucks so it's not like I was stalking her

But depending on her answer, I will or will not be

"I can't. I'm going to Han's. Spending the night there", she answers

I call bullshit

"Oh alright", I answer, "Maybe next time"

"Yeah. Next time", she replies

"Yeah for sure. Next time", I text

She sends a smiley face to end the conversation

I get up from my bed and walk out of the dorm to Yunho's car

I already asked him to borrow it so it's fine

Getting in it, I drive to her job

--------------------------

I'm seething

As I suspected, she's not with Han

If Han is even real

I followed her from her job at Starbucks

She walked home, the Starbucks a few blocks away and I followed in the car

I parked across the street from the apartment door so I can see if she leaves

An hour after she got home, a food delivery comes to the door and it was for her

She came down, in her PJs and got the food

After another hour, I saw her leave again, with a big dog on a leash I've never seen before

A pitbull

When did she get a dog?

She took the dog around the corner of her apartment building and she came back twenty minutes later

She and the dog went inside and she hasn't come out in over a half an hour

It's nine now and she's definitely not going out

With anyone

Opening the door to the car, I get out, slam the door closed and lock it

Then I stalk to the door to the building, pulling the door open

I'm so fucking mad

I take the elevator to the third floor, get to her door and pound on it

She needs to explain to me why she lied

I'm not leaving until she does

She opens the door, shocked to see me

"Wooyoung?"

"You lied to me", I say evenly, walking in her apartment, her huge dog barking at me

Gotta admit, the pitbull is scary

"Nnnn...no I didn't", she answers, closing the door

"Shush Noodle", she scolds and yeah ok, that's a cute dog name

Maybe not for that dog though

But not why I'm here

"Bed", she says and Noodle turns, going straight to his bed in the living room, whining

She turns back to me and I confront her

"Yes you did Joanne. You said you were gonna be with Han all night and instead you're here. Alone"

"We uh....we broke up"

I raise my eyebrow

She has to know how fake that sounds

"No you didn't. I doubt you were ever together with him"

She narrows her eyes, "What the fuck Wooyoung? You don't know anything!"

"I know you've lied to me before. I've seen you when you were "with Han", I say, using finger quotation marks, "You weren't with him then and you weren't today"

"How the fuck do you know?"

"Because I followed you!", I exclaim, trying not to get angry

But it's hard

She's blowing me off and I don't know why

I didn't do anything

"I followed you. From when you were still working. I saw you leave, I saw you come in here by yourself, I saw you go downstairs to pay for the delivery. I saw you walk your dog that I didn't know you had. You were never going to see Han today"

"Wow way to be fucking creepy Wooyoung", she snaps

I'm not letting her change the subject

I know it was creepy but there wasn't any way I could find out

She just would of lied to my face

"Why are you ignoring me? Every time I ask you to hang out or to come to a photo shoot, hell anything, you blow me off. Why?"

"I was with-"

"Don't lie to me!", I snap, my anger finally breaking through

How can she lie to my face after everything I just told her?

"Tell me the truth Joanne! Don't lie! I never lied to you!"

Fury fills her eyes, "Yes you did! You lied to me for months!"

I stare at her in confusion

What the hell is she talking about?

I never lied to her

"No I haven't. Stop trying to change the subject"

"You lied to me", she snarls, "Telling me things when we...we slept together that you didn't mean"

I literally have no idea what she's talking about

Everything I ever said I meant

"I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't lie about anything"

"I heard you!", she yells, tears pricking at the corner of her eyes

She's gonna cry?

Why?

What is happening?

"You heard me?", I ask, trying to get to the bottom of this

"Yes Wooyoung. I heard you. What you said to your members about me"

What I said?

I didn't say anything

I don't talk about her to them

She's just mine, I don't want to share her with them

"Joanne, you're going to have to tell me what you're talking about because I honestly don't know"

"I heard what you told them! That I was ugly. That you wouldn't touch me with a ten foot pole. You laughed and agreed with one of them who said I was such a dork and a nerd. You said "yeah all she does is study, she doesn't know how to have fun"

The memory of that day slams into my head

Oh fuck

She heard me

That's why she texted me and said she couldn't come to the photo shoot

She was there

Then she left?

Fuck

"Remember now? You said you'd never have sex with me, that I was just your nerd best friend from childhood that you felt sorry for. You said I wouldn't know what to do with a guy if I ever got one"

I did say that

But it was to get them off my back

It was the fourth photo shoot in a row she was coming to and they were harassing me about having a crush on her

I didn't want anyone to know I was with her or know about my feelings for her

She was the one thing that was just mine, the one thing not tainted by the media, not tainted by the idol lifestyle and I wanted to keep her for myself

If I told them about her, then they'd want to hang out with her and it wouldn't just be me and her anymore

"You said I'm pathetic and that Jongho would regret being with me. Apparently I suck at sex"

That's not true

I said that so Jongho wouldn't go near her

She's mine

I didn't want him taking her away from me

"I heard you talk about Ara. How you liked her and wanted to ask her out. Wanted to fuck her"

Of course I don't want Ara

I want her but I'm terrified to tell her that

I never had these deep feelings for any girl I went out with

I never fell in love before

And I did with my best friend

I didn't know how to handle that and I still don't

But all this time, I missed her so much, wishing she was with me

Just laying next to me, in my arms

I haven't really been happy since she disappeared

"You lied every time we were together. The things you said.....how good it was, how I was the best you ever been with, how pretty I am, it's all lies", she shouts, tears rolling down her face, "And still, I left for you! So you didn't have to worry about being friends with a pathetic loser. So you could be with Ara and be happy!"

I shake my head

Ara would never make me happy

Ara isn't her

"And still you fucking text me asking me to hang out when I know you don't want to. That you're only doing it because you feel bad for me", she snaps, "And you have the fucking nerve to come here and tell me I lied to you?"

I don't say anything because I'm shocked and still taking everything she said in

"Get out", she snarls

"No", I shake my head

I can't leave

Not now

I have to explain everything to her

I hurt her and I didnt mean to

I have to fix this

"Leave Wooyoung"

"No Jo. Please listen to me"

"Why should I? You're just going to lie to my face"

"I'm not Jo. I'm going to tell you the truth", I tell her, "I lied to them. To the guys. They were making fun of me, about having a crush on you since that was the fourth photo shoot you were coming to in a row. I wanted them to stop so I said all those things to get them off my back"

She snorts through her tears, "Yeah ok. Sure"

I shake my head, "It's true. Of course I don't think your pathetic or your a nerd or a loser or you don't know how to have fun. I know you know what to do with a guy because you've done it with me. I said that Jongho would regret being with you because I didn't want him to go after you"

"Why not? You didn't want me. You wanted Ara"

"No I don't!", I exclaim, "I don't want Ara! I want you"

She stares at me for a few seconds in silence

Then, "You must think I was born fucking yesterday or something to believe that"

"I'm telling the truth! I only said those things to them because you're only mine! You're not theirs, not the media's, not ATINYS'. You're mine and if I told them about you then you wouldn't be mine anymore. They'd want to hang out with you, the media could get pictures of you, ATINY would find out about you and that would take you from me. I want you to only be mine"

"What are you talking about? Nothing you're saying makes sense. Why would you care about people finding out about me if you don't care about me?"

"I do care about you Joanne", I say frustratedly

"No you don't"

"I fucking love you", I shout, shock all over her face, "I'm in love with you ok? And I didn't know how to handle it. And at the time the guys were teasing me and the only way I could think of to get them off my back was to say that shit to them"

She just shakes her head and I'm desperate for her to believe me

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you. I never wanted that.", I apologize, "I want you. I love you so much. I miss you so much it's driving me crazy. I'm only happy when I'm with you"

"I don't believe you", she says

"Then believe what you feel", I tell her

Taking her hand, I pull her to me, kissing her, pouring all my love into that kiss

She lets my tongue in her mouth, and I touch mine to hers, chills running down my spine

I drown in her kiss and I don't want to be saved

I kiss her for a few minutes, then we both pull away

I down at her, in her brown eyes, anxiously waiting for her to say something

Her hand moves to the back of my neck, pulling me back for another kiss

I willingly go, gluing my lips to hers, my tongue to hers

Her arms move around my neck, my move around her waist, pulling her against me

The kiss turns heated, both of us moaning softly

Bending down, I pick her up, her legs going around me as I walk to her bedroom

Once inside, I kick the door closed, getting her on her bed

She pulls me on top of her, her hands going under my shirt, fingers running along my back, heating every nerve

We quickly discard each other's clothes until we're both naked

I move in-between her legs, laying on top of her, kissing her again

I never want to stop kissing her

She moves her hips against me, rubbing against my hard on, getting me wet

Fuck, I just want to be with her

Moving my length to her, I push my head in first, then slowly sink into her, inch by inch

I moan in her mouth, feeling her tight pussy open just wide enough for me, hugging me tightly

"Wooyoung", she moans, her body arching into mine when I bury all in

"Oh fuck princess", I groan, feeling her throb hard on me already, drenching me in her creamy juice, "God you feel so fucking good. I missed you so much"

"I missed you Woo", she says softly

Pulling out, I thrust back in, over and over until I get a good pace going

And I'm in fucking heaven

"Fuck princess, you're so good for me. The best for me", I tell her, pressing kisses into her neck

"Woo", she moans and fuck me, I Iove hearing her say my name

"I meant everything I ever said to you baby", I assure her, "Every single word. You are the best, perfect. You're so fucking beautiful, I can't take it. I can't stop staring at you. I swear everything I said was true. You're my perfect everything. I love you"

She moans loudly, her fingers digging into my back as I bury inside her perfect cunt again and again

I go a little harder, going deeper, my head hitting her spot

"Wooyoung!", she cries, pleasure all over her face

"Fuck yes, say my name baby. Fuck I missed hearing my name in you're beautiful voice"

She clenches on my cock hard and after a few more hits to her spot, she screams my name, coming all over my cock

Intense pleasure hits me so hard as I gasp, feeling her orgasm

So fucking good

I missed this so much

"Again", I whisper, fucking her through it and continuing to pound into her

"God, baby", she moans, her hand sliding in the back of my hair, pulling hard

"Don't run from me again baby", I whimper, kissing along her collarbone, "Please baby. I...fuck...I was so fucking devastated when you told me you had a boyfriend. It was torture not seeing you, not hearing your voice, seeing your smile. Please princess, don't disappear again. I want you so bad. I love you"

"I...", she whispers in my ear, "I love you Wooyoung"

My heart explodes in pure joy, smiling against her soft skin

"I want you Woo. I want to be with you"

"You are baby", I assure her, "You're mine"

She nods, holding me tightly against her, "Please Woo, don't hurt me again"

"Never baby", I promise her, "I never will again. I swear. Never"

She nods, "Kiss me"

Lifting my head, I crashed my lips into hers, kissing her deeply

I move my arms on either side of her head, hovering over her, burying inside her at a fast pace, hitting her spot every time

I know everything she likes and I'm going to do it all for her

Make her cum over and over

Make everything up to her

Today and everyday after that

Moving one hand to her breast, I squeeze, moaning in her mouth as I feel how soft it is

How hard her nipple is against my hand

Pinching her nipple, I play with it, roll it around as I fuck her into the bed, feeling her soak me

She's so close, holding my cock in a vice grip

"Cum on my cock baby", I urge her

"Fuck Wooyoung!", she shouts, her body shaking under me, her cunt going crazy on my cock as my brain shuts off from the bliss

Good God, her orgasms never cease to give me so much pleasure

When she finishes, I pull out, laying down and burying my tongue in her pussy, tasting her sweet cum

"Fuck", we both moan, her from the pleasure my tongue is giving her, me from the pleasure of tasting her

"God I missed your cream baby. So fucking good", I praise her, licking around her slit, then moving up between her swollen lips

Taking one of her lips in my mouth, I suck on her, listening to her moans

When I let go, I slide my tongue on her engorged throbbing clit, her screaming getting louder

"Wooyoung! Fuck! Right there!"

Swirling my tongue around her bump in circles, I feel her drench my face and chin

Changing it up, I lick her clit, slowly, teasingly, making sure she feels my entire tongue

"Oh Woo", she whimpers, her hand snaking into my hair

I go at it, flicking her clit with my tongue, drawing circles on her, anything to give her pleasure

I know what she wants and I'm teasing her before I give it to her

My tongue travels slowly down her cunt, circling her hole right before plunging my tongue in

"Oh god!"

Her cunt immediately clenches on tongue, pulsing around it as if it was my cock

Licking up, I slide back in as far as I can

I fuck my tongue into her cunt, relishing in the taste of her, in the spasms around my tongue

God she's so fucking good

I don't stop, burying my tongue in her over and over

"Wooyoung!", she cries, clenching my tongue and covering it in her delicious sweet cream

Moaning loudly, I swallow all her cum, letting her ride her orgasm on my tongue while she cums in my mouth

When she finishes, I clean up her hole then immediately wrap my lips around her clit, sucking like my life depends on it

She screams, pulling my hair hard, making me moan

I live for her pulling my hair

It turns me on so fucking much

It should hurt but it doesn't, it just gets me going

I slide two fingers inside her, pulling them in and out of her wet warm pulsing cunt, making sure my fingers press right into her spot

"Woo baby, yes, fuck yes", she cries, "Right there baby"

"Fuck baby, I fucking love eating this pussy", I moan, licking and sucking her clit while I massage her spot, "Best pussy I ever tasted"

"Don't stop Woo. I'm gonna cum", she cries, "Wooyoung I'm gonna cum"

Her cunt tightens on my fingers as she screams my name, coming hard, her body arching so prettily

Pulling my fingers out, I lick around her slit, swallowing over and over

When I finish that, I suck her off my fingers, reveling in her taste

Taking her hands, I pull her up, while I lie down

"Ride me princess"

"You don't want me to suck your dick?", she ask innocently, biting her lip

Fuck me, I do want that, but I want to be inside her more

"I do but right now I want to watch you bouncing on my cock", I tell her, "My cock hurts so much princess and I need to be inside you"

"Mmm yeah?", she teases, slowly climbing on me

She moves my cock, laying it on my stomach, sitting on me

"My baby boy wants to be inside me?", she asks, sliding her wet cunt along my shaft, her hands on my shoulders

"Oh fuck", I moan

"Feels good?", she asks, moving faster along my length, leaving the underside of my cock a creamy wet fucking mess

I nod my head quickly, my fingers pressing into her hips

She moves one hand in my hair, pushing the sweaty strands off my face, "My Woo likes getting his cock massaged?"

"Yes", I whine

"With my pussy?"

"Fuck yes. Oh god fucking hell, yes I love it"

I can't take the pleasure, it's so good and I'm ready to fucking blow

"Please baby", I struggle to say, watching her swollen lips move along my dick, "I....I wanna cum inside. Please let me"

"Whatever my baby wants", she says, kissing me so softly

When she slides up to my head, she wiggles around, getting it inside her

Then she slips down my cock, her ass slapping against my thighs

"Good damn", she cries, "How does your cock always feel so good Woo?"

Literally I have no idea but I definitely can say the same for her

Her cunt wrapped tightly around me is fucking heaven

"Always fills me perfectly", she moans, her eyes closed, leaning on my abs as she circles her hips, rubbing her spot on my head, her perfect pussy throbbing hard around me, "Fuck seriously, no other cock has ever filled me perfectly"

"Princess is you think any other pussy wraps around me so perfectly, takes me so perfectly then your insane", I answer, "You fell the fucking best and I live for having my cock inside you"

She bounces once, smirking, "Is that all? You just like your cock inside me?"

"No baby", I groan, feeling her bounce again, taking my whole cock inside her, "I love you. Everything about you. I love spending time with you baby. Without sex. I want to do that more. After tonight"

She smiles genuinely, nodding, "Yeah Woo. I want that too"

"Good baby", I smile

She nods, leaning over, kissing me again and I return the kiss eagerly

"Lets get you coming inside me", she whispers in my ear when the kiss ends, "Fill me up so I'm full of your hot cum"

"Yes baby, please", I whine

Sitting up, she moves fast and hard on me, taking my cock deep inside her with each slam

"Oh fuck princess", I yell, stars exploding in my vision from the pure pleasure

She rides me so fucking hard, her body full of sweat, her face in so much pleasure

My beautiful princess

"Wooyoung, Wooyoung!", she cries, her cunt spasming rapidly

"Cum baby. You pussy wants to", I moan, helping her move up and down my length, "Cum and I'll fill you up princess"

"Yes Woo", she moans, falling apart on my cock

The ecstasy takes over and I scream her name as I cum the hardest I ever had in my life

"Stay on my cock! Stay on my cock princess", I yell, stopping her from bouncing and holding her down on me, "Please stay and cum on my cock"

She leans back, her nails digging into my thighs, both of us screaming each other's names as we both orgasm

Oh fuck, her cunt sucking on my cock is the best fucking thing ever, prolonging the pleasure

I don't want it to end

Of course it does and when it's over, I pull her right on top of me, cuddling her and kissing her all over her face

She giggles, wrapping her arms around my neck, holding me tightly

Rolling us over, I lean my head on one hand, looking down at her

She smiles at me and I softly touch her cheek, feeling all the love I have for her

"My baby. I love you so much"

"I love you Woo. More than anything"

And she'll never know how grateful I am that she still loves me

I'll show her every single day how much I love her

"Promise you won't disappear from me again? I don't think I could take it again", I whisper, "I missed you so fucking much you don't even know Jo"

"I do know Woo", she says, touching my cheek too, "I missed you the same. It was so hard not to see you. It hurt so much to think that you were....with Ara. I thought you....we're happy with her"

I shake my head, "I told you princess, I can't be happy with anyone who's not you. You make me happy. So fucking happy"

"You make me so happy Woo. You always did"

"I'm glad baby. I want to make you happy. I promise I'll make you happy"

She nods, "I know Woo. And I promise I'll make you happy"

"I know baby", I tell her, kissing her soft lips again

After, she cuddles into me as close as she can and I love every fucking second

"Tired baby?", I ask, hugging her tightly

She nods, "You wore me out Woo"

I laugh, "Yeah you did as well to me too princess"

"So sleep now?", she asks

"Sleep", I confirm and both of us settle in for the night

--------------------------

"Noodle, this is Wooyoung", she says to the pitbull the next morning

I stand there and I have to admit, I'm scared

The dog is freaking huge for a four month old and the fucking jaws on this thing are massive

When we woke up, I got up to go to the bathroom but when I opened the door, the dog was sitting right there

I shrieked like a girl while she died laughing on the bed

She commanded the dog to stay in the living room and I ran to the bathroom the ran back to her room

Now we're in the living room and she's telling me that this massive dog is very friendly and playful unless she gives an attack command

Apparently she's still training him

Oh it's a boy

"Woo, this is Noodle"

I wave stupidly at the dog, who just sits there, eyeing me

"How uh did you pick that name?"

She shrugs, "I wanted something silly for a big dog. To take some fear away"

Well it's not working

I'm still scared

"Wanna pet him?"

"I...uh.....I...."

"C'mon baby. You're my boyfriend now and you're gonna have to see Noodle more often now"

She's right but shit I don't want the dog to bite my hand off

She kneels on the floor calling Noodle to her

Noodle immediately runs to her, jumping on her, licking her face while she laughs and pets him

"Good boy", she smiles, "Such a good boy"

"I thought I was your good boy", I say, then realize what I said, my face on fire

She just smirks up at me, reaching up and taking my hand, "You are baby. I want my good boy to meet my other good doggy boy"

Then she pulls on my hand, dragging me down next to her

"Stay", she says to Noodle

To me she says, "Sit with your legs crossed"

I do, my hand shaking a little in hers

"Don't be scared", she tells me soothingly, "Noodle won't hurt you baby. I promise. Just let him smell you ok? If he jumps on you don't get scared. He's still a puppy and that's how he plays"

This dog is still a puppy?

"Ok Woo?"

I nod and she gives me a kiss to my cheek

"Noodle come"

Noodle comes closer to me and when he gets right in front of me she says, "Sit" and he does

She holds out our hands to Noodle, my hand on top

Noodle comes closer, his wet nose on my hand, sniffing

Noodle then continues sniffing up my arm

When she moves away Noodle walks around me, sniffing, his nose in my hair and I try so hard to stay still

I hear her soothing voice talking to me to keep me calm

Noodle gets back in front of me, his nose against my cheek

Suddenly I feel my cheek get so wet

He licked me

Noodle comes in my lap, continuing to lick me, knocking me down

She's giggling while Noodle continues to give me kisses all over my face

This can't be good for my skin

"Noodle, off baby", she says and he immediately moves off me

"Oh baby", she laughs, helping me sit up, "He likes you"

"Great", I say, wiping my face

At least he won't attack me

"Pet him", she says, "Just hold out your hand and he'll come to you"

"I don't think I need more kisses"

"He won't baby. I'll stop him if he does"

Well ok

Holding my hand out, Noodle comes closer, putting his head under my hand, nuzzling into my hand

I just smile and run my hand over his head, his tongue hanging out as he pants

Yeah ok he's really cute when I'm not terrified of him

After awhile, I tell her I need to wash my face and she goes with Noodle to the kitchen to feed him

After I wash my face, I head to the kitchen, and I hear her talking

"He loves dogs Noodle. I know when he gets more comfortable he's gonna play with you all the time. I think he's just used to small dogs and you're a big boy. But he'll love you like I love you"

I just smile to myself at her ultimate adorableness while she talks to her dog

Walking in, she looks up at me from her place next to Noodle, who's eating

Getting to her, I hold my hands out

She puts hers in mine and I pull her up

"I already love Noodle baby. I'm not scared anymore. He's adorable"

"Really?"

I nod, "Really baby"

Moving into my arms, she hugs me tightly and I hug her back just as hard

"Princess, I have a performance tonight-"

"And you have to go", she finishes, "Practice and getting ready right?"

I nod

"Ok Woo. I'll let you out-"

"Actually, I want you to come with me"

She looks up me, her eyebrow raised, "You do?"

I nod, "I do. I want you with me from now on as much as you can be"

"But what about the media, ATINY and the guys?"

"Well I figure you can get to know the guys as they're kinda a bigger deal in my life. And I'll do everything to protect you from the media right now. And the media and ATINY don't have to know about us just yet. Is it ok if it's just me and you for awhile?"

She moves her arms around my neck, smiling, "I'd like for it to just be me and you baby. For as long as we can"

I'm relieved to hear her say that

I don't want to share her with everyone right now

Not yet

The guys I have to, but not with anyone else

"Yeah baby. I want that too", I agree

She leans up, pressing her lips against mine in a soft kiss and I'm happy

--------------------------

"C'mon princess, don't be shy", I say, pulling her behind me, "You've met the guys before"

"Yeah but now I know some of them think I'm loser and a dork"

Right, I forgot about that

"Don't worry baby, I'll tell them off for that later"

"Don't Woo. Just forget it"

I stood walking and turn to face her, "No baby. I'm going to tell them why I said that shit. And once they get to know you, they'll see what they thought was complete untrue. I promise"

She blushes, "Ok baby. If you say so"

"I do", I smile at her, "So c'mon"

Putting my arm around her waist, I lead her into the dressing room

"It's about ti-", Hongjoong says, his voice trailing off, "Hey Jo. I didn't know you were coming. Haven't seen you in awhile"

"Hi Hongjoong", she answers nervously

"It's ok baby. Don't be nervous", I tell her, kissing her temple

"Did you just kiss her?", Seonghwa gapes

"Yeah", I answer, leading her to a couch

We sit down and I keep my arm around her, holding her hand with my free one

"So....what's going on?", San asks

"Oh, she's my girlfriend now", I answer nonchalantly

"Uh what?", Yunho squeaks

"Didn't you say-", Yeosang starts but I cut him off

"I lied. Everything I said was a lie. You were all on my back about her and I lied to get you off of it", I tell them, "The truth is I love her. I loved her then when I said all that stupid shit and I still love her. The only difference is that now we're together"

"And she loves you?", Mingi asks

"Yes", she answers, "Very much. I uh loved him for long time"

I smile, kissing her cheek, making her blush

I love making her blush, it's adorable

I notice that Jongho isn't saying anything

I know I have to talk to him about this

I didn't know he liked her before and he didn't know I loved her

I feel like I should explain to him and hope he understands

The guys all continue with the conversations they had before while her and I just sit together in comfortable silence, waiting for me to be called for makeup

"I love you", she whispers

"I love you", I whisper, holding her tightly and loving the cuddles she giving me

And I get so excited knowing that her cuddles are something I will always be able to have

Her cuddles and her love

Her

My perfect princess

[layanasstories]

If not in this lifetime...

----

I think some souls have a way of connecting without our knowledge.

That's why you can meet someone for the first time, but inside you just know.

You know it's not the first time you felt them.

- JmStorm

----

Chapter 1

"Hey hurry up!! I don't want to miss it, the others are already there!!" Emily bangs on the door of the portable toilet, where I am sitting. Well more hanging above, no way I am going to sit down on the seat of a portable toilet. Today is my 25th birthday and the girls had arranged tickets for one of the biggest dance festivals, thats where I am now, to celebrate my birthday there. We've seen and heard several DJs already, but in a few minutes the one Emily loves will start. I quickly finish what I'm doing and step out of the toilet. Emily is ready with the bottle of water that I can rinse my hands with, there is no real washing, but this is better than nothing.

We make our way through the crowd, I can already see Ruby and Alice standing in the distance, near the stage. Emily holds my hand tight so we don't lose each other in this crowd. "There they are!!" she calls to me as she pulls me along. The moment we reach the other girls the DJ drops the first beat. The crowd goes wild, dancing, screaming and singing along, just like we do. You can feel the bass bouncing in your chest, my cheeks are sore from the smile I am wearing. My heart is beating fast, I'm clammy with sweat. Everything feels right, it's so astounding it almost feels like it's jumping out of my skin.

Then the DJ lets the bass die down and plays some slower tempo music, so that the crowd has a short break. The DJ cheers the people up with some shouting, but I don't understand a word of it. I catch my breath and look around the crowd, it's amazing to see all these people having so much fun and being happy at the same time. When I look around I suddenly make eye contact with a pair of sparkling blue eyes, they pierce right through me. I see something of recognition in his look, there is something familiar about him. It's like you've seen each other before, but you can't remember from where. I don't get a chance to get a better look at him better because the quick bass resumes and Alice pulls on my arm to dance. I turn to her, I look back one last time to where he was standing, but he is nowhere to be seen, then I let myself be carried away again with the rhythm of the music and dance.

When the DJ has finished his set, the crowd cheers, which is the time for us to leave the field and get a drink. Emily and Ruby lead the way, Alice and I follow. But before I can take Alice's hand, mine is taken from behind me which startled me and makes me look that way. The man with those mesmerizing eyes holds my hand, he steps closer to me, looks at me with a captivating smile and with his other hand he places something in my hand he is holding. Then he lets go of me and disappears into the crowd again.

"Who the hell was that?" all three girls ask in unison as we stand at the drink counter. I hold the piece of paper tightly in my fist, afraid of losing it, even though I don't know what it says. "I really don't have a clue." I shrug. "What did he say to you?" Ruby looks at me suspiciously. "Nothing." I answer her. "Nothing? He just stared at you?" Alice sounds surprised. But Ruby is more disgusted "Eew what a creep.". "A bloody hot creep if you ask me." Emily broke her silence "Didn't you see him or something?". Ruby didn't give up "And what did you say to him?". With an embarrassed chuckle I answer her "Uhm, nothing, maybe I'm a creep too.". "Nothing?!" Ruby throws her hands in the air in frustration. "Layana, you'll never get a guy if you act like that?" Alice rolls her eyes at me. "Who cares? He's gone now and we've got a lot of fun to do, that's what we're here for." I shrug my shoulders again and quickly put the paper in my handbag. The hours that followed were filled with fun and positive energy, we danced and sang until we couldn't anymore. Around midnight the festival was finished, we took a taxi home. One by one we were dropped off at our house, I was the last. Exhausted but satisfied I drop on my bed, I'll take a shower tomorrow.

Three weeks went by, it's Friday night and the girls and I agreed to go out tonight. I pulled my handbag out of my closet, that I use for going out. I want to throw away the mess of the festival whats still in there, when a piece of paper falls on the floor. I pick it up to see what's on it. 'text me 67934' I completely had forgotten about the guy, but now it reminds me again. Despite my great curiosity, I doubt whether I should send him a message or not. I put the piece of paper with his number on my table, so I can think about what to do with it while I get ready.

I had just finished and put on my coat when Alice sends me a message that she is ready downstairs, in front of my flat. I answer her that I'll be there in a few minutes, but then the note catches my attention again. "Oh fuck it" I mumble to myself as I save the number to my phone and type a message. "Hey, mysterious stranger, I know it took me a while before I send something. But here I am." I look at it hesitantly for a monent, but then I press send.

[kaijurakunsobs]

If requests are open could you do a Heisenberg fic with a teen or young adult reader(no older than 20 please) who stumbles into the village trying to get away from their parents and after they get attacked by Lycans Heisenberg patches them up and takes them in trying to hide them from his sister and mother miranda. Could you please do it with an AFAB reader who doesn’t identify as female? I am currently dealing with borderline verbal abuse from my conservative father who doesnt like that though I am AFAB I don’t identify as female.

first, baby, I'm so sorry that this is happening to you. I know how bad and mentally taxing that kind of living situation can get, I was in a similar situation and somehow managed to pull through.

you are not alone, you are loved and I hope everything gets better, never forget that it's you who defines yourself, your self worth should NEVER be defined by others

All you can think is...how cold everything is around you, how the freezing air burns your skin and lungs, but, you have endured something worst, physical pain can be healed with time, emotional and psychological pain is what hurts the most, what feels eternal and haunting, it coils around you, it grows and never let's go, like being branded, it leaves marks that never go away.

Running aimlessly through the snow feels like nothing.

What made you get out of the car?

Was it anger?

Desperation?

Does that even matter anymore?

You can't hear their voices anymore, so that's a win.

Farther away you see smoke and fain lights, distant sounds beckoning you closer to that place, and you let yourself smile widely when the silhouette of someone standing so close to you, you could get help, start somewhere new, be happy!

But it's so short-lived, that you question if there's divine retribution, karma, or just the universe laughing in your face.

Your "savior" is covered in blood, a man with a perpetual expression of agony lays in the snow, dead. The monster turns to you and finally the cold freezes you where you stand, it's not alone, and all the other creatures are looking at you, dark soulless eyes fixated on their new prey.

You have felt like that before under his gaze like if you were vermin, it made you furious how you were treated and consider as something lesser than a person. These things look at you the same like you are just a speck of dust in their path, and maybe you are, if the mangled body is any indication that taking a life will be nothing for them.

You see it from the corner of your eye, one of them lunges for you, and then? everything is a blur.

You remember kicking and punching wildly, adrenaline making you forget about the pain of the bites and scratches, there are memories of you running and using something to smash the head of one of the monsters, a rock, perhaps? But in the end, cold, blood loss, and exhaustion are enough to bring you to your knees. One of them grabs a fistful of hair and roars in your face and you know, that, this is it, you fought and did your best, but this is the end of your travesty...so much for your new life of freedom.

"Get the fuck away...I SAID FUCK OFF!" his voice is so loud that it makes you whimper and recoil "LET GO, CAN'T YOU HEAR ME? LET GO, DAMN IT!" the smell of blood and a warm liquid hits you hard, but at least you are free, letting your body hit the snow

"What do we have here?...this one is alive, but ya ain't from around here, do you?" he's smoking and something small and silly wants you to tell him that smoking is bad, which makes you smile so softly "...Interesting"

Heisenberg rarely gets intrigued by anything, he hasn't found anything to spark his curiosity in so long, so of course, he had to come and see what was causing such a commotion. What he thought to be a villager, fist fighting the lycans so valiantly, turned out to be a teenager, he saw you from afar,  furiously kicking lycan after lycan, you didn't even notice the growing red spots in your clothes and the black eye, it was survival and feral like behavior. Truly interesting.

Now, what made him pick you up with care? years from today he will say it was just "Scientific interest kiddo! nothing more", but, it's the pain in your face that makes him act so soft, it's not the agony brought by your wounds, this goes deeper, it's different and he knows it very well.

Under normal circumstances, he would have taken you to Moreau, but he knows the loud mouth will give you to that bitch Miranda and that will be it for you. Dimitrescu is OUT of the equation, so does Beneviento, hell knows what her psychotic ass would do to you. So he brings you back to his home and takes time to clean your wounds, true, his stitching abilities are amazing...on corpses, and a lack of anesthesia and your occasional movements makes it hard for him to stitch you properly, but by the end of everything, you are bandaged and clean, isn't that the important part?

He’s done his part, the rest is on you. If you had the strength to fight and even kill a lycan, you might live to see another day

How long were you out?

You are warm and so fucking sore, cracking your eyes open is a big task and even harder to sit up in the bed you are laying on. The room is black and smells like tobacco, oil, and something you can’t place but it’s nice.

Barefoot and curious you start to get up, wincing deep and loud when pain floods your body, but you get up non-less, you feel the cold air hit your legs, and immediately pull down the shirt to cover yourself. Then it fully clicks, the jagged memories of what happened slaps you in the face and make you lose your footing, falling back on the bed you pry the shirt off from your body, you see bandages and patches placed on smaller wounds, your head is killing you and your right eye hurts like crazy.

With small breathes you pull the shirt back on and force your body to get up and investigate the room. There are piles of clothes and pieces of paper everywhere, picking one of the pants you sigh, these are yours, but they have been destroyed either by the beasts or by however brought you here. Looking around there’s nothing more, time to go out.

The only door leads you to an open room, the kitchen and living room placed together, in one of the sofas you can see someone laying down, their chest rising and falling softly, their face obscured by an old hat.

You try to be as quiet and sneaky as possible when getting back into the room “Where do you think you are going, kid?” his voice is thick with sleep but the sound is enough to make you yelp, slamming your shoulder against the door frame, the man jumps up and in a couple of strides he’s beside you “Can you more fucking careful? the stitches gonna get open and if you get an infection I ain’t risking my neck to get you meds”

He’s a bit taller than you with squared and wide shoulders, his face is stern and it seems like he’s annoyed about something, is it you? Did you anger him? You try to remember what could you have done to make him so mad but nothing comes to you, is not like you remember much, and what you do, is better to be left forgotten.

Heisenberg has seen many people look at him with fear, reverence even, but he has never been in the receiving end of a look like yours, he has to close his eyes for a second, carefully grabbing your wrist and dragging you to the kitchen, almost forcing you to take a seat in on of the wobbly chairs he owns.

“Well now that you are back with us, I can finally cook something to eat. You must be starving! I would too after the way you fought back there” he lets out a howl while he busies himself with pulling ingredients for whatever he’s cooking “I saw ya, you know? That was one hell of a show and I know about putting up good entertainment, you gave those lycans a good beating”

Lycans? So those things have names...uuuh, who would have thought.

"What's your name kid?" you get pulled out of your mind by his voice and the smell of cooking eggs, for a moment you wonder and think, that this is the time to be addressed by YOUR name "...I'm Y/N, sir"

"Cut the sir bullshit, you ain't trying to impress nobody here, you can call me Heisenberg, Karl if you wanna get my attention quickly, got it?"

"Yes...Heisenberg?"

He's rather harsh from what little you have seen of him, but he's careful when serving you breakfast, a steady hand serves you tea and makes quick work of a loaf of bread, whit that you two eat in relative silence, he eats like a wolf and that's enough to make you hide a smile.

"Once you are...better..." he's speaking between bites, eew "I'm taking you to get some new clothes, staying here ain't gonna be free, ok?" with his fork pointing at you he waits and continues without you answering "I'll have to teach you...that's gonna take time..."

"I'm a faster learner!"

Heisenberg laughs at the offended tone in your voice, taking a big gulp from his mug once he stops "I like ya kid, there's a fire in you and I respect that, we gonna get along"

It takes you almost 2 weeks to fully recover and be able to move without crying out in pain. On the day he announces that he must take off your stitches, he's kind when pulling on the thread, talking about how that same day he's taking you to the seamstress cuz he's "done" having you wear his stuff.

The seamstress in the Village seems flabbergasted when "Lord Heisenberg" comes into her house, demanding she makes you good sturdy pants and easy to move in shirts. From that sole visit is enough for people to call you "Heisenberg's assistant" whenever you are sent to the village or just went spotted by anyone. The Duke, the merchant that sometimes you have found yourself talking to, does nothing but fuel the rumor, people already fear Heisenberg on a god day, now they fear you might be spying for him.

You would be lying by saying that, Heisenberg is a normal man, he's flamboyant and loud, filled with pride, and what you can describe as...showmanship, he speaks with passion when explaining to you the ins and outs of the factory. He's always close, never breathing down your neck, just close enough to hear if you need help.

The first time you see him use his gift is the most embarrassing and awkward moment of your life.

You are working on some molds for pieces he needs to make from scratch, he taught you where you should work on that, away from whatever lurks in the lower areas of the factory. You were so engrossed in getting the mold out perfectly, tongue sticking out and heavy gloves helping you to pry open the damn thing open, you don't even jump when a hand lands on your shoulder, but you do when the ghoulish face of a corpse appears beside you.

He's running the second he hears you, a high pitched sound tearing through the noise of the machinery, he sees you bolting it towards him and a Zwei Soldat quickly catching up with you, the drill in its arm too close to your back, the moment you are close enough he pulls you towards and behind him, a metal sheet flying to the thing and beheading it in an instant.

"Kid...Kid, look at me, hey, eyes on me" you are not crying, there's no blood anywhere and nothing seems to be missing, you seem more startled than anything else, but you listen to him, concentrated on him and his voice "Y/N, it's ok kid, I'm here"

Then it happens, you let it slip. "Thanks...thanks dad"

You feel him go tense, the hands-on your shoulders shake for a second and embarrassment comes crashing down on you, you are ready for him to yell or push you away and order you to see if the mold is still useful, but he pulls you close, patting your back like you never said anything.

There are days when you can hear him talking on the phone, his voice growing irritated, and his explosive temper getting worst.

You are curled up in the crawlspace that he turned into your room, listening to him talking with someone, he sounds exasperated and nervous. This time he takes longer to come out from his room, a new cigar in his mouth and hammer over his shoulder, usually, he would tell you that he's leaving for a couple of hours, this time he's just there, tapping his foot and sparing quick glances at you.

"Get your coat, we need to leave"

That's new...he never takes you with him to wherever he goes, but you don't feel like arguing and do as he says, slipping your boots on and grabbing your coat.

Heisenberg is unusually quiet this time, only the snow crunching under your feet make enough sound to fill in the void, he takes you farther from the village and into a rundown church, you can hear new voices and the unforgettable sounds of the lycans snarling.

Inside the candlelight is soft and cast strange shadows of the people already waiting inside. There's a woman in a white dress that probably towers over you, another lady dressed in black and her covered, she sits in a corner with a creepy doll on her lap, and finally, a shy man who battles to cover himself with the torn cloth of his jacket.

"Is this why mother Miranda called us? Did you brought a new toy and never informed her? what a bad dog you are Heisenberg"

"Non of your business, Dimitrescu" Karl does everything to keep you behind him, away from the doll or the twisted man, but especially from the woman, Dimitrescu as he called her.

From where you stood, you could see how beautiful and regal she is, sitting with grace and a sarcastic smile plastered on her face. Noticing you, she moved slightly to get a better look, narrowing her eyes, making you feel small and like food. Before she can't even speak the sound of feathers caught your attention, giving Karl enough time to guide you to one of the pews, making you take a seat beside him.

The four adults greeted the new woman, the infamous mother Miranda, you have heard about her in the village and through small stories shared by the Duke, but mostly, you have heard Heisenberg curse the woman and call her every single name under the sun.

"Usually I wouldn't care for what my children do in their dominions, but, Karl, I must say I'm disappointed in you...to hide this child and avoid telling us?"

"I apologize, Miranda, the right opportunity never came" ooooh he's pissed

"I say you take his toy, Mother Miranda, and if possible, give me that lovely lady to me?" at that your gut twist uncomfortably, it's been some time since you were...addressed like that

"Excuse me?" Heisenberg cocks his head to the side, looking at Dimitrescu over his shades "Are you talking about my SON?"

"YOUR SON?! Don't make laugh, child, I can smell the sweet maiden blood running through her veins, that's a lady not one of your dirty lycans"

"And you are bitch no matter how well you dress!"

"ENOUGH!" Miranda's voice breaks them apart, everyone looking at her "Care to elaborate, Heisenberg?"

Karl takes a second to take a drag from his cigar and blow a cloud of some into the air "I found Y/N here, they fought hard to survive and I took them in, just like Alcina, and her lovely daughters...I decided it was my time to have a child of my own"

"That doesn't change the fact that you brought an outsider and didn't inform mother, and now you are trying to do what exactly? have...them...play house with you?"

"Lady Dimitrescu, that's enough" she's looking at you, mother Miranda in staring, and Heisenberg as a hand on your back, suddenly you are hyper-aware of everything, the sounds and smells, the movements each person in the room does, the way the candles flicker "I allow it, may this never happen again, Heisenberg. Next time there will be consequences"

You feel like passing out after that, the screams of Dimitrescu and the doll get drown by the ringing in your ears, everything keeping you together is Heisenberg's hand on yours cursing up a storm as he pulls you along with him.

The cold air feeling nice against your burning skin.

"Kid? I think you are ready" you are halfway through the trek back to the factory when he speaks again

"Ready for what?"

"To be introduced to the Heisenberg family true work, of course! What kind of father I would be if I don't involve you in our family's business"

You trip with your feet hearing him say that, so...he meant it? what he said in the church...that you are his son?

"Come on Y/N, I won't go easy on you because you are my kid now, quick quick"

Catching up to him is easy and you feel at peace when one of his arms wraps around you, he begins to talk about how many things he's gonna teach you and how exciting is to have a young mind to shape.

For the first time, you are eager to get back home.

[cosmiclatte28]

minors do not read (heavy rage, more sinful than smut) not a fanfic (please, its really me raging like the world is ending. its embarrassing but it kinda calms me down 1%)

When I decided to stand up, dust myself off, and take another step... life just directly throw a big ass lemon on my face.

WARNING : THE WORDS BELOW THIS LINE ARE STRONG, FULL OF RAGE, CURSES AND YOU NEVER SEE THIS SIDE OF ME BEFORE. SO, if you're a minor, you never read some rage message, never want to see me as a monster, pass over this post thank you so much. no one has to read this, i'm just screaming to the world

I want to cry :) but I know it's not gonna solve anything

I am tired. Why am I knocked down back to the ground just after I convince myself things will be okay

I'm so mentally confused, afraid, exhausted, and tired.

Give me something to hold on. Inject me happiness, whatever.

I'll be away again. I am so sorry why am I so unstable like this.

I want to end everything, but again it's just a "small unfortunate bad day" said people

f you universe. you won, i'm tired. I'll just sit down here and watch as I realize just how bad my decisions are to stop but I am exhausted.

I WANT TO THROW A WATERMELON TO THE GROUND

I WANT TO SQUISH A FLUFFY BALL OF CAT

I WANT TO BITE A HAND

I WANT TO BURN MYSELF :)) NO NOT ROAST, BURN

FUUUUUMMMMM i hate my unstable emotion what is this. DO I HAVE A DOUBLE PERSONALITY?

should i call the mental help line? should i start making appointments? is this my breaking point?

I still have lots to do tonight but I'm just so close to fuck everything and just well be a disappointment 🤐

THIS IS A RAGE POST. IT'S MY RAGE. MY FRUSTRATION OF TODAY AND MY REGRET OF TOMORROW

fuck me like literally and figuratively

on my way to just go make hinge tinder and find guys

i don't care anymore

don't be like me. i'm a bad example

how am i expected to survive in life if something like today just made me overwhelmed

a lot of things make me overwhelmed eew what's this

who is this weak girl. the real me? eew :) let's keep on being fake strong . keep the weak girl aside..

and tonight as you still have to sit and meet people and talk. don't break down there, don't rage there and don't get mad at innocent people.

shut the lips. distract your mind or well at least think of nothing. keep acting and don't let anyone know.

LET'S SEE WHAT ELSE AM I HEARING TONIGHT HM?

will tomorrow be different? IT BETTER BE. FFS I'LL REALLY TURN CRAZY IF TOMORROW IS EVEN WORSE THAN THIS

my keyboard could broke if i continue writing this. ITS FURIOUS ITS SCARY AND I could feel myself disgusted b y me.

i am the storm, i am the monster, i am just another regular human without a perfect life. who has flaws, a lot of rage, a lot of unstable emotions, a lot of bullshit and well a holy virginity thats all. but idk

i want to take a walk but that won't be a great idea seeing how i will doze off in the middle of the road.

my head feels like exploding and no it's not an expression

is my blood pressure rising? or is it too low?

i know my mistakes, i know my sins, i know my secrets and i hate all of that. What's the point of people seeing you as a good stable girl when in reality is you're a total opposite? PUBLIC PLAY . life is prettier with lies right?

I'm scared of what I've become

MINORS AGAIN... SKIP THIS OR WELL JUST IDK unfollow for a while if this scares you.

PLEASE THERE'S MANY TRIGGER HERE. DON'T READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO PUT AS THE TW. but don't. It's scary. I don't know where else to put. I want to write it and burn it but i shouldn't play with fire not at this state of mind....

*******************************************************

A great liar. A double personality? Or just a lonely lunatic 🤷‍♀️

My lies in the web is >>>> irl lies. I didn't lie when i meet people irl, but once I am cosmic or someone else ... i'm a totally different person

Gosh i'm a good spy material except for the crybaby part hahahah fuck i keep calling myself crybaby but til now i couldn't cry. Coz my head keeps yelling to me that i shouldn't cry because "crying won't solve any problem"

Can I get all the science part of tumblr and teach me how do I inject happiness but not in form of drugs to this amazingly still clean blood vessels?

Can I get all the optimistic side of tumblr and fuckin block my head from thinking pessimistic thing even for a 1/10000000000 sec

Can I get all the doctors here in tumblr to just check me if my heart is actually still beating with life and not just oxygen and bloods.

Am I still alive or is this heart just trying its best to make me live but not feel alive

I know I shouldn't spend my time being like this. No one knows when your story ends. I've always been that annoying person who says "Life is so short. Enjoy every moment" WELL YEAH NOW I AM ENJOYING MY SUFFERING thanks?

One time i was so happy life really slap hard in the face. NOT EVEN IN THE ASS..COME ON.. IF ITS IN THE ASS I might like it and ask for more.. but well life is bitch

LIVE IS EVIL if you read it from the other direction. Yes once again perspective won

Perspective dang it. Idk i'm tired of existing. I need to stop lying, but once you lie and once you got used to it.... its so hard to stop

Like me ... you slowly become a monster. Who loathe herself for not stopping herself to become a monster

Yes i am your beauty you meet irl in web but once i'm alone and facing life. Well I might be the wicked witch but i'm not gracious or tall enough to be them.. so.. i'm a monster

The one you don't dare to look at night or day. The one who makes you sleep with one eye open..the one who makes you ask your parents to check the closet and under your bed.

I am the monster in your nightmare and I am taking over cosmic as she writes this.

This is not cosmic. She's never like this.

Reach out cosmic, ask for help and see how no one cares because they all got their problems to face. Come back here cosmic, stay with your darkest fears. Feed us with your happiness. Drown yourself in our darkness and close your eyes as you make yourself get used to the loud silence of eye stabbing darkness

The monster inside my soul

[maraudersbutmuggle]

Orion & Walburga

Content Warning: Insanity, Toxic obsession, Harassment, Bullying.

Orion & Walburga were around the same age. They were second cousins but were raised as cousins. Walburga was beautiful. The most beautiful girl Orion had seen. And when Orion imagined love and romance, Wally was the first girl that popped into his mind.

But it was after Walburga hit puberty, when she became a woman. Breasts, highlighted hips, curves, and soft lips. And Orion had extrange desires for her.

"Orion!" Walburga yelled that particularly summer day at Marbre Noir, after he playfully took her drawing notebook away. "Give it back..."

Orion grinned putting the book above his head.

"What do you draw here, Wally?" Orion took a peek. Only flowers and landscapes "Obscene things like penises?"

Walburga rolled her eyes "You're disgusting" she said "Give it back!" she tried to reach it.

"Only if you give me a kiss"

Walburga took a step back "No..."

But Orion leaned in for a kiss. He wanted to taste those lips.

But Walburga pushed him away.

"Get away from me, you creep"

And suddenly, Orion felt someone taking Walburga's notebook away. And they pushed him so hard, Orion landed on the floor.

Alphard.

"Don't tell me this creep is bothering you, sister"

And Cygnus.

Orion hated those imbeciles who thought they were better than everyone. Cygnus walked around like he was already the Black Heir. He was working in the company. And Alphard was his little minion.

Alphard gave Walburga her notebook back. And she held it in her chest.

"Orion always bothers me" she said. She raised an eyebrow "And I don't need your bloody help".

She turned to look at Orion, and put out her tongue. And then she left inside.

Orion snorted. He could see it as her flirting. He could. There was nothing that could break them apart. Not even Cygnus or Alphard.

"Leave her alone, looser" Alphard spat.

"Wally and I are going to be together" Orion showed them his middle finger.

"You creep. She is just eleven" Alphard said, disgusted "She is your cousin"

"Second cousin, actually. Alphard"

"You know what, Al?" Cygnus grinned "I think I drank too much beer..." he opened his trousers "I need to pee"

So he began, peeing on Orion. The boy protested and gagged. But there was nothing he could do. The urine smelled terrible. And Cygnus laughed and laughed. And Alphard too.

"I warn you, creep" Cygnus said now closing his pants "Stay away from our little sister"

"Go... Go to hell... Wanker" Orion said while he gasped and choked.

Cygnus and Alphard hit palms and left. And Orion was left there, thinking he would get his sweet revenge. They were going to suffer. And Walburga was going to be his.

But when Walburga got to Hogwarts, she was praised and loved by fucking perverts that wanted her for them. Obviously, she was pretty. Who wouldn't like her? But Orion wouldn't let anyone have her. She was his.

So Orion started the rumours. He told everyone how Walburga was a slut. Or wasn't available. He took care of every single unfortunate soul that dared set his eyes on Walburga. Orion was a Black. He was powerful and popular at Hogwarts. And when he became a Knight, and later their leader, he took advantage of that situation to push everyone away. And Walburga got a reputation.

"I heard Walburga had been with practically all The Knights members" she heard some girls whispering in the bathroom "She's a total whore"

"And have you heard the rumours?" another girl exclaimed "She and Orion had done it. Benny told me"

"Eew... Aren't they like cousins?"

"Yeah exactly. It's like incest or something..."

Walburga couldn't take it anymore. She slammed the stall door opened. The girls immediately went quiet and very pale. Nathalie and Jessica were fucking hipocrites because they frecuented The Knights parties all the time.

They observed as Walburga walked to the mirrors and stared at her reflection. She fixed her hair. They were jealous. Because Walburga was prettier than them.

"Nat... Jess" Walburga said "I must say that that lipstick looks horrible on you, Nat. And Jess, you look fat..."

Walburga walked away but before she went out, she turned.

"And Orion is my second cousin, by the way" and she left.

But what they had said affected Walburga. And she found a corner, behind The Wicked Witch Statue to cry. A slut. If only everyone knew that Walburga had a bloody repellent against boys. One second, they showed interest in her, and at the next, they acted all weird. Walburga didn't understand. What was the issue? Maybe everyone saw her as a Black. Born in the powerful, millionaire family. But not Walburga. The person that she actually was.

So Orion found her there, crying.

"There you are, Wally"

Walburga looked away. Orion acted like the protective older brother. Like Walburga didn't have enough with Cygnus and Alphard. But now that they were adults, long graduated from Hogwarts, she knew that her parents told Orion to keep an eye on her. Because everyone treated her like a delicate princess, like a baby. But now thanks to that, the rumours were there.

But the rumours weren't entirely wrong. Orion and her had done things once. He had touched her. Walburga had felt vulnerable and lonely and it had felt nice.

Orion kneeled down when he saw her crying.

"What did they do to you?" he said, angrily "Tell me who it was and I..."

"Fuck Orion! Leave me alone!" Walburga yelled "All of this is your fault"

"Why?" Orion asked "I am on your side..." He sat down on the floor next to her "Don't pay attention to them, Wally. They're just jealous, because you're better then them. You're a..."

"Black?" she interrupted "Trust me I know"

"I was gonna say beautiful girl" Orion smiled and he tried to touch her hand. But she pulled away.

Orion sighed "You know I am the only one that cares about you..." he said "I love you..."

"This is insane..." Walburga started crying

"What?"

"You're my cousin"

"Second cousin" Orion corrected

Walburga shook her head. This was wrong. This was wrong. This was wrong.

Orion put an arm around her. But it was true. Orion was the only boy that loved her, wanted her, liked her. And secretly Walburga loved the attention. But no. She couldn't like him that way.

Walburga pushed him away.

"Just stay away from me!"

And she walked away.

Walburga's next years at Hogwarts were a torment. Because everyone made fun of her. So she followed their rumours and whispers. And she acted crazy, and always got into trouble. And showed her middle finger to everyone that whispered about her.

She dressed like a rebel. Piercings, black nails, bubblegum, ripped tights, black colour, red lipstick.

"Oi...Walburga" Francis, a boy from her class said once "I heard you suck dicks for a cigarette. Is that true? Oh wait... I'm not related to you, so..."

Everyone laughed. Walburga rolled her eyes. Orion had graduated two years ago. And people still continued with the rumours.

But Walburga was used to it. She simply responded by kicking Francis in the balls with her boot.

But Walburga could be anyone outside Hogwarts. Maybe meet different people. And be someone else. And not be tormented for being a Black, heir of the Black Empire, and Orion's cousin.

Second cousin.

And Walburga found that with Alex. Lower class, worked as a mechanic in a store, rock n roll lover, older. A man. Walburga fell in love with the way Alex treated her. Walburga liked that she felt sexy and older, and free around Alex and his mates. This wasn't anything like what it had been with Orion. Walburga was mature now, more sure of herself she felt like a woman. She was eighteen, almost nineteen and in love. And Walburga felt like she could do anything. Maybe run away with Alex, and start a new life. Be free. Free from the formalities of being a Black, and the reputation she had at Hogwarts, free from her brothers, free from Orion.

But Orion was still obsessed with her. Orion was even more powerful and influential, now that he was 23 and worked at the company. Orion had his own company shares. He was rich already. And when Artucus, his father, or Melania, his mother, asked when was he going to find a girl to marry, he always stared at Walburga and smiled. And he would whisper: "Very soon".

And one day, Orion followed Walburga. And he saw her with Alex. Orion followed them to a club. And he watched how Walburga was dancing happily with that asshole. And Orion felt rage. He needed to get rid of him.

"Hello Jim" So he called one of his ex Knight mates "Remember what you told me once... how your father... took care of people that owed him money?... I need you help. I want to scare a bloke... Alexander Standall.... Yeah I have the money, and I can pay more..." Orion smiled evily "I want your men to scare him, a bloody good scare. And I want them to tell him to stay away from Walburga forever, or I can do worse..." Orion paused "Yeah... Walburga is my cousin" he rolled his eyes "Second cousin. I'm looking out for her..." then he smirked "Cheers mate" and he hung up the phone.

So Walburga went one day to Alex's mechanic shop. Actually his father's. And she smirked as she saw him fixing a car. She was planning to propose to him to run together, before her parents could send her to Paris, with auntie Cassiopeia, so she could teach her to be a "fine lady of society" and find her an old rich husband. She wanted to be free. With Alex. Because she might love him.

"Hi... Alex" she smiled.

And then he faced her. Alex had his face swollen, black eye, lips bruised. Someone had taken the shit out of him. Walburga gasped and covered her mouth.

"What happened to you?" She tried to reach him but he backed away.

"Get away from me" he was angry. And Walburga was confused.

"Alex..."

"Walburga Black..." he spat "Third daughter of Pollux and Irma Black, from The Black Empire, really? You're one of the heirs..." he shook his head in disbelief.

Walburga had lied. Because she didn't want to be a Black. And she knew if her father, and Cygnus and Alphard knew about Alex, they would hurt him. And maybe they did.

"Did my family do this to you?"

Alex snorted.

"Your family is practically the mafia" he said "Get away from me. The Blacks are influential, powerful and dangerous... I don't want to get into trouble"

Walburga had tears in her eyes now.

"Alex..."

"Just bloody leave..." Alex looked away angrily.

"Alex, please..."

"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, BITCH"

So Walburga left, crying. She cried because it wasn't fair. Because the Blacks were awful. And she detested being one of them. She detested her life. And nobody liked her. Nobody would want to love her just for who she was.

Walburga bursted into Cygnus office, furiously the next day.

"Dear sister..." Cygnus smiled "What can I do for you?"

"YOU HAD NO RIGHT!" she yelled

"I beg you pardon?"

"I know you know what father did to Alex" Walburga cried "It was awful!"

"Wally..." Cygnus raised an eyebrow "Who the fuck is Alex?"

Walburga was confused. She had sworn her father was behind this.

"Cygnus... Do you know if father sends men to hit people?"

"Blimey" Cygnus gasped "No that I know of. What are you talking about?"

Walburga just sat on the chair opposite him. She was tired. And she began crying again.

"Oh..." Cygnus whispered uncomfortably. And he stood up and stood beside Walburga, patting her back "There...there..."

"Don't you get tired, Cygnus?" she cried "Of being a Black?"

"Why would I, Walburga?" Cygnus answered "We are rich and powerful. And we have good genes... Imagine being poor or something"

Walburga sighed frustrated. Her brother was an idiot. So she stormed out of there.

Cygnus snorted "Bloody women hormones"

"Mother..." Walburga whispered while she laid on her mother's lap "I reckon I do want to go to Paris"

"Paris is the right place for you, darling" Irma said "Cassiopeia is strict but you can learn many things from her. And Parisian blokes are divine... Très magnifique"

Maybe at Paris, Walburga could run away from Auntie Cassiopeia. And be free. And start a new life there. Just like she wanted.

"Tu as raison, maman"

Pollux and Irma organized Walburga's departure. Until it got to Orion's ears.

"You're leaving to Paris?" Orion said one night after dinner, entering to Walburga's room without permission.

Walburga jumped. She was about to put on her pajamas.

"Get out of my room!"

"What about us?" Orion asked. He looked hurt.

"There's no such thing as us" Walburga rolled her eyes "Now leave please..."

"They're making you do this" Orion nodded trying to convince himself "Auntie Irma and Uncle Polux"

"No..." Waburga answered "It was my decision"

"That's not true"

"It is!" Walburga yelled "Because I want to get far away from everyone, from this shit... from you!"

"But I love you..." Orion whispered sadly "Who is going to love you, like I do?"

Walburga sighed. She couldn't quite picture why Orion was so obsessed with her. Nobody else was. Not any of the boys at Hogwarts, not Alex. Just Orion. She could find someone at Paris, but Walburga was afraid that she couldn't. What if there was something wrong with her? What if no one can see the real Walburga except for Orion? What if no one can love her like he did?

"Just get out of my room" Walburga whispered "They are going to notice"

"Nobody cares about me" Orion shook his head "Not like you do"

There was something in Orion's eyes. Like he was being sincere. And he was showing his real self. Not the one he showed everyone. Walburga knew Artucus was awful with his son. And Melania didn't care. And Lucretia was always laughing at him. Walburga hated Lucretia too.

"Get out of my room, Orion" Walburga whispered now.

"Not until you tell me you're going to stay with me"

Walburga shook her head "I cannot do that, Orion. I have to go"

"Then tell me you love me"

There were desperation in Orion's eyes.

"I..."

But Walburga couldn't continue, because Orion shut her up with a kiss.

Walburga didn't kiss him back, she pushed him away. And slapped him.

But Orion just stared at her. Eyes full of love, watery. He looked like a lost puppy.

You're never gonna see him again. A voice said in her head. Why don't you give him what he wants? Just one time. And then, be gone forever.

And Walburga apparently listened to her stupid brain, because she pulled him in again. For another kiss.

Nobody had kissed her like that. With such desire. Like she was everything to him. Not even Alex.

And she liked feeling that way. So Walburga let Orion continue. And kiss her neck, and touch her. And take off her clothes.

It was only after Walburga was fully satisfied, and Orion too, that she realized what she had done. And how this had been wrong and inappropriate. Especially if their parents were downstairs. Especially if they were cousins. Second cousins. Not a big deal.

You'll never see him again anyway. Walburga thought.

"You need to get out" Walburga said covering herself with the sheets.

"Wally..."

"Out!" She practically pushed Orion out of her bed. Her bed. "If someone finds about this we are screwed..."

So Orion got out of bed. And he got dressed. And he didn't even look at Walburga. And Walburga was freaking out.

"Orion..." She said when he got to the door.

He turned around.

"I'm still going to Paris"

Orion didn't answer. He just left Walburga's room obediently. And Walburga was left confused.

[dolphiana]

Men and the "perfect" woman

It's really disgusting to watch men ( online and real life ) talk about what a woman has to look like. Not too tall, but not too short either, beautiful without heaps of make-up, breast cup B-D because A is too flat and everything over D is too much, dressing up for them because they don't look sexy enough in comfy clothes, high-heels are a must, no cellulite or stretchmarks because that's ugly, flat stomach, perfect butt and long legs, tan of course and nipples in the right size and colour ( yes, I've actually come across bullshit like that ). Now we could say, okay, that's personal preference, but especially those guys who pretty much want a devoted super-model continue to diss every woman who doesn't meet their standards. Short and big boobs? Gheez, running dwarfs with mega udders. Large nipples? Eew, grotesque. Hanging boobs? Haha, looks like an old hag, no thanks. Cellulite? So disgusting, probably doesn't work out enough. When talking about the "perfect" woman those essays are usually about their looks, because who cares about personality as long as she doesn't cause too much drama and doesn't run off with other men? Now that made me ponder how men would react if women started treating them as superficially as they do vice versa. Beard? Only if you have the face and hair for it, otherwise big no, it will just make you look like a hairy toddler or a Neandertal. A thin beard just makes you look pathetic. Trained body? Yes, but without going to the gymn every day because that's annoying, and no exaggerated muscles, no one wants the Hulk as boyfriend. And don't miss leg day, the muscles on your body have to look consistent. Skin not too pale but not too tan either, please. Has to be a head taller than the woman, we don't want a Hobbit walking by our sides. Hairy body? Eeew, no, that's disgusting, dating a man, not an ape. And don't you dare to wear your oversized hoodies and ancient jeans, keep an eye on the latest fashion and dress up accordingly. Flat butt and no Marvel-superhero upper arms? Off with you to the gymn, but be back in time for us to go shopping! If women started being more condescending like this towards equally superficial men, giving them a bit of their own medicine, I'm pretty sure those would be the first ones to snap and freak out , probably get violent, because their fragile male ego got a scratch and can't handle that. The ego that is so huge that even a 300 pound hairy and sweaty guy or a 35-year old scruffy nerd, who still lives at his parents' basement, thinks they can demand a supermodel as girlfriend, but the moment someone criticizes their own insufficiencies they crumble like a dried-out cookie. Men who can't deal with any kind of criticism aimed towards themselves should quit talking about what a woman "has" to look like as if we were only a piece of aesthetic meat. Not all of us have a skinny body, not all of us have full hair and good looks, perfect perky boobs or smooth cellulite-less butts. Most of the time, we KNOW about our flaws, because we are women and get confronted with what we are expected to look like daily. But it still hurts to hear how we are ugly, disgusting, unsexy or grotesque just because we are not perfect. Dear guys, no one is perfect. Not us, not you. If you are a superficial asshole who makes fun of women for not meeting your beauty standards you are in fact far from being perfect yourself. So stop making demands.

[amarantine-amirite]

Translate Server Error

Barbara booted up the computer. She looked at the LizardTalk icon. “That LizardTalk software isn't for us, is it?” she asked.

“It is,” Sakura replied.

Barbara sucked in her cheeks. “That's what I was afraid of.”

The school banned students from bringing pens and pencils to school in response to multiple incidents where students have used pencils to injure themselves. one time, somebody attempted to kill themselves by shoving a pencil up their nose. Another time, someone threw a pencil up three floors with enough force that it got stuck up somebody's ass. Thanks to these people, the school will now expel anyone caught with pens or pencils because they possess material to build weapons.

The students now have to use this computer program called LizardTalk. LizardTalk works not unlike DragonNaturallySpeaking. Unlike DragonNaturallySpeaking, it claims that it can detect what language a person is speaking and translate it automatically. It really can't.

Most of the kids didn't mind using the speech-to-text software. Barbara hated it. Nobody can blame her. Scottish accent plus piss-poor speech recognition and language detection algorithm and even worse translator equals a lot of frustration and some very funny “Engrish”.

Katie looked at Barbara and giggled. “I take it you’re not a fan of the changes.”

“Hell, no!” Barbara replied, “LizardTalk blows!”

“It blows?”

“Aye, it blows chunks.” Barbara nodded, “Big, wet, monkey chunks!”

Sakura laughed. Debby grimaced. “Eew,” she said, “that’s disgusting.” She then turned to Sakura. “Sakura, don’t encourage her.”

As Barbara continued to speak, the computer assumed she was speaking Spanish, and transcribed and translated what it thought she was saying. The Word document open on the computer displayed the words, “I am a boy, this is an octopus”

“See what I mean?!” Barbara said she gestured to the computer screen, “Take a look.”

The computer had added the sentence, “Give me a chewing gum, fried chicken hamburger hot dogs I am very sorry.”

Katie couldn’t help but read over Barbara's shoulder. When she saw the document, she started giggling. “What the heck?”

Now, LizardTalk not handling Barbara’s accent properly was only half of the funny part. Not only did the software print the translation, but it also showed the original text. Barbara spoke Spanish well enough to know that “Camarero, esta comida que está a punto de servirme, ¿soy el primero en comerla?” did not translate to “give me a chewing gum, fried chicken hamburger hot dogs I am very sorry”; it translated to “Waiter, this meal you are about to serve me, am I the first to eat it?” Stuff like this made her feel fully confident that the software just strung together a bunch of random words and called it a translation.

Sakura's eyebrows did their best impression of Volkswagens attempting to parallel park. "What do you mean?" she asked.

Barbara gestured to the computer printout. The Spanish portion read “dónde está la biblioteca”, but the translation provided read “I am very hungry, boys are ambitious.” "I'm talking about this," she said, "Everybody knows that “dónde está la biblioteca” means “where is the library”, but the computer just spits out this random sentence. This software is complete and total rubbish!"

Not only did that software grossly mishear and mistranslate everything, but it also interacted with the computer’s operating system weirdly. Barbara managed to accidentally log out of her account, log into Emily’s account, and purchase about $6000 worth of SpongeBob SquarePants popsicles on the principal's credit card.

Emily now had some explaining to do.

“Emily, care to tell me what happened here?” Principal Ball demanded.

Emily sat there with a shocked look on her face. “I didn’t do it! I swear,” she protested.

Principal Ball shook his head. ”Your actions have consequences,” he said firmly, “I now have a suspended credit card because of your little shenanigans. And beyond that, what am I supposed to do with $6000 worth of SpongeBob popsicles?!"

“But I didn’t do it!”

“Doesn't matter,” said Principal Ball, “If you did do it, you need to be held accountable. If you didn’t do it, you need to learn now that this is not acceptable behaviour.” He sat down and lowered his glasses for dramatic effect. “Either way, you are suspended until further notice.”

Emily sat there in disbelief. The whole thing came to her as a rude shock, sort of like a surcharge in a formerly surcharge-free ATM. How could she be suspended for something she didn’t do?

A few days into the suspension, Emily’s phone chirped at dinner. Her father glanced at her and asked, “Who’s texting you?”

“Nobody,” she replied.

The phone chirped again a few seconds later. This irritated her dad. “I said, who’s texting you?” he barked in a harsher tone.

“I said nobody!”

Her dad’s patience wore thin. He swiped the phone and scrolled through it. “Oh, hell no.”

Emily’s father was the sort once he met up his mind, he never wanted to be confused with the facts. If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and acts like a duck, according to him, it is an armadillo. Especially when it came to boys. “I knew it!” he bellowed, “You’re sneaking around with boys!”

Emily panicked. “No, I’m not!”

Emily's father Lost his cool and slammed the table so hard but the glass surface shattered. All the food on the table fell to the floor. “Don’t lie to me!” he growled, “I don’t want you cavorting with boys! This is what got you suspended!”

Emily stood up and started to shake. “You don’t understand, dad,” she whimpered as she wrung her hands, “it’s not what you think…”

“You just told me that it’s exactly what I think!”

Emily tried to say something else, but her father interrupted her. “We’re taking your phone away! Go to your room now!”

Emily bolted to her room. If her father had bothered to read the texts, he would have seen that they were from Barbara and that they actually said, “I’m sorry that I got you suspended. It really wasn’t my fault. I swear the first person who develops speech-to-text software that reliably handles Scottish will make a fortune.”