#but maybe the date helped a little too
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So… I had a random thought today while looking at some fanart.
In comics, it’s generally agreed that Jason Todd died on April 27. He came back to life approximately 6 months later. That would put it in late October.
We can make an argument he was resurrected on Halloween. You know, the day that the veil between life and death is the thinnest per folklore?
I’ll just leave you guys with that thought
#jason todd#dc comics#batman#red hood#we don’t know the exact date#at least to my knowledge so it works#I’m well aware that traditionally he came back because Superboy prime punched the source wall#but maybe the date helped a little too
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Okay but Tommy drops out of high school — he told his father he was gay and he told him he could either be homeless or go to military school. He goes to military school and joins the army and he likes flying the helicopters because it means he doesn’t have to do any of the killing himself. And he makes some friends.
There's one guy who's like the squad leader who's a few years old and built like a Greek god and Tommy's young and a little bit in love. And they're friends maybe even family because this whole group of people spend every waking (and sleeping) moment together. And they all talk like a family and they all say they love each other and tease each other and it's nice. And one night it's just the two of them trading a flask of some sort of alcohol that Tommy doesn't know the name of and the man asks Tommy why he joined the army and where he wants to be in five years and Tommy trusts this man. He's half way in love with him so he doesn't even think twice before he tells the story about the time he came out to his family and his father nearly beat him to death before sending him here. And the conversation tapers off after that and he doesn’t register the change in the air but when he wakes up the next morning he’s being dishonourably discharged because he poses “unacceptable risk to the high standards of morale, good order and discipline, and unit cohesion that are the essence of military capability”. He knows what that means.
Tommy joins the fire department because he doesn’t know what else to do. He represses anything regarding his sexuality because he knows now that it’s wrong. He almost feels like he has a family again because his captain seems to like him and some of the guys are cool even if they say things he doesn’t agree with. And then he starts agreeing because maybe they’re right and he’s wrong and he’s just inherently wrong. So he follows their leads and is just straight racist because that’s how he can fit in.
And then a black lesbian woman joins and says she’s a black lesbian woman and Tommy doesn’t understand that either because you can’t be queer you just can’t be because it’s wrong.
But he nearly dies and and an Asian man saves his life and a black lesbian woman comes up with a better idea than any of them had and she tells them she’s no different and she is just as capable. So he improves himself he does and he tries to be better but he still can’t be who he is because the last 2 times he was honest about that he was betrayed.
Tommy leaves the 118 and “don’t ask, don’t tell” is lifted and he meets this guy he likes who likes him back and the 217 don’t seem to have a problem with the gender neutral pronouns and he slowly but surely lets himself open up again and be who he is and when the thing with that guy doesn’t work out because he’s moving to New York and Tommy’s not sure he’s ready to leave, it’s okay because his crew is there and they support him and he can still be himself.
#years later he flies a helicopter into a hurricane for the same people who stopped him from going too deep#into something he didn’t even believe in#and there’s this guy with a birthmark above his left eye and the widest smile there is#and he’s saying absolute nonsense and Tommy can’t help but smile#and there’s this other man too also gorgeous but not his type#who has all the same interests as him and he thinks if anything he’s made a new friend#and then the cute dorky guy calls the next day stumbling over his words saying his name is evan - from the rescue mission#and he asks for a tour of the 217 and Tommy agrees because how could he say no#and then he’s asking to go out but he already has plans but rain check? because there’s something about this guy that maybe…#and Tommy thinks that’s it but then evan turns up everywhere#and then things get a bit funny and Tommy feels like it’s his fault and he has to apologise#so he goes to Evan’s house not expecting anything just to say sorry#and Evans there looking absolutely amazing as always and he’s saying things that Tommy can’t help but read into#and he’s getting closer and closer and Tommy can’t help it#he kisses him and keeps his eyes shut just a moment longer just in case#he doesn’t want to open his eyes and see a disgusted look across Evan’s face so he stays closed just a little longer#but evan just looks like his brain has restarted and he’s nodding and joking when Tommy asks if that was okay#and they’re going on a date#and it hurts when evan says those worlds because tommy has spent long enough in a closet being someone he’s not and hurting people#and he can’t go back there he just can’t and he doesn’t want to be the one to force evan into anything so he leaves#and then he gets a call a stuttered invitation to meet at a cafe and of course Tommy says yes#he doesn’t know what he expects but it’s not this#Evans beaming at him with the brightest smile asking him to be his date to his sisters wedding#how can he say no when he looks like that (as long as he never buys coffee again)#and evan holds his hand even though everyone is around and ok that’s good#he’s late to the wedding and practically dead on his feet but he said he’d be there so he comes and the moment evan sees him#hes kissing him and he’s ok that’s great he could get used to this#bucktommy#911 abc#tommy kinard
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My feelings towards ao3 this morning.
#baldurs gate 3#astarion#bg3 astarion#like-i get it. but-#please. please for the love of god. just fluff or non-sexual fics.#for five seconds.#please.#I can only handle so much corn. especially when it's almost all geared just towards women.#this is all /lh i dont actually care all that much- but there comes a point where theres too much and all a man wants to do#is hold another man close. or go on perfume dates or pottery lessons with another man.#small things to help healing or gentle things or silly playful things.#hell- even taking care of all the spawn with Astarion in the bad ending-#why are all the bad ending fics ive seen corn btw? I've seen like- zero non-corn ones.#i get it. I get the vibe. but like- also. consider. like- maybe I wanna read angst with. with no corn?? please?#I've got 4 unposted fluffy fics im working on. One being hurt-comfort with some extra hurt#which i had to stop writing for a bit today because it was hurting a bit TOO much.#but yea. a little less corn for Astarion? for those who aren't horndogs? please? or just don't wanna fuck him because they#dont wanna hurt him more- (im not at the point in game where he's comfy with sex again yet-)#BESIDES GALE IN THE WAVEMOTHER ROBES IS RIGHT THERE PEOPLE-#LIKE COME ON. IF YOU'RE GONNA SEXUALISE A MAN HE'S RIGHT THERE WITH HIS PUPPY DOG EYES AN HAIRY CHEST.#There needs to be more sexualisation of Gale. NO I don't take no for an answer (Astarion is still my favourite though-)
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if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
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world's most well-adjusted daughter
#mizuki okiura#okiura mizuki#aitsf#ok now spoilies for that game in the next tags. if u do not tag aini spoilers and aitsf i guess then thats on u#aitsf spoilers#aini spoilers#ai the somnium files#aini#mizuki date#u ever think abt how little time mizuki got to be mizuki date with her dad before everything in aini went to shit#i can acknowledge it follows the res route without being happy that its like BAM ok now mizuki's lost her parent AGAIN#anyways thinking abt how messed up itd feel to lose the same eye date lost but now ofc he's lost so like. salt in the wound#and ik u/ch/////iko///shi said she stays w others who help her get back on her feet but like god i imagine she's resentful that it ended up#that shes stuck in a situation like this#maybe take it as a redesign too idk i have so many overwhelming thoughts abt a mizuki that did Not cope with it as 'well' as she did in ain#hence covering her eye. a more date inspired look still mixed w her old design too#my art#yea nvm the more i think abt it the more this is less redesign and more post-explosion route in aini#shes got her backpack..... her missing eye......... girls gone thru it all
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I know my life would be significantly improved if I found a way to start exercising regularly, but I’m constantly exhausted bc it takes everything I have just to get by without collapsing and losing everything. I know my life would be improved if i was able to make myself get a reasonable amount of sleep. But I have no self control, even when I was briefly getting more sleep and feeling better I couldn’t stop myself from slipping back in to bad habits. My mind never stops racing, so I’m constantly thinking and worrying about how my bad behaviors only keep me trapped in a somewhat miserable state. I can hardly take care of myself, I don’t know what I could even do to try and get better, and even if I did I’d manage to find a way to make myself terrified of doing it. I don’t know how to be a person, I am not doing well, and I am very afraid I am going to be like this until I either finally slip up and ruin my own life or until I die, likely younger than I should because my anxiety is so bad I’m in a near constant state of stress.
#maybe having a therapist or something could help. but I’ve been burned by them before so I’m scared to try again#I’m scared to do anything#I know I’m supposed to ‘do it scared’ but it’s really really really hard#<girl on 3 different anxiety medications who can barely hold it together long enough to keep her job#things might be easier if I wasn’t so lonely but it’s not like I have much energy to try dating. I have too little self confidence for that#anyway#god I really can just convince myself that my only options are to be miserable and then wallow in my misery. as if that helps at all.#there are things deeply wrong with me
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soooo which one of you is gonna kiss me at midnight
#she speaks#more importantly who is gonna take me on a little date. maybe to see zoo lights or to the aquarium#or maybe just a nice restaurant where its too cold when we leave so we rush to the car n sit for a bit in the dark waiting for#it to warm up. talk quietly about having a good time and thanking you for helping me with everything ♿
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helppppp being disabled is so expensive fuuuck. i have like. an old insulin pump (~6 years old?) and my endocrinologist said I should get a newer model and the CGM that goes with it which runs in a loop, and that would be AMAZING for my blood sugar and keeping me a1c down but… out of pocket with the insurance I have right now (deductible not met) is $2,000 . and goddamn I do not have $2k . they have a payment plan but it’s like $50/mo for 4 years and I might die if I commit to that. but wouldn’t a new pump and cgm that work together be nice… on top of having a new service dog also??
just for the record at my current job I make $10/hr + tips and work ~25h/wk which obviously isn’t great and then I have to pay 525.60 to my dad for rent (cringe) and then leftover from that I have maybe $200 every two weeks to keep to myself but it doesn’t even keep to myself because I have a new puppy and I go to therapy and am disabled so I have doctors appointments and debts and it’s just like come ON man does everything have to be this expensive ???? why does my CGM sensor right now cost 37.99 a piece and my quarter yearly endo appointments cost $45 for just the appointment not including the debt I have accrued for the labs and other various testing that’s like $608 right now… ON TOP OF THE $1.4K DENTIST DEBT I HAVE ??!!?!? it’s over for me. fuck
#.txt#venting sorry#I’m just so. overwhelmed#i also hate asking for money from people T-T so posting like this sucks#^ that being said though if you want to send me money I will. Not say no#it’s just awkward for me to accept money from people but it does help going towards rent and food and shit on top of all of that#or you can commission me!! My commission post rn is a little out of date but#you’re always welcome to send an ask or sm#I’m also gonna try learning how to do n/s/f/w shit yeah#maybe I can make money with that too. Fuck it all#diabetes posting
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#tp#prompt#au#crack#cas is an injured creature / alien / angel who is staying in Dean's shed or barn or something#and dean is dating or maybe living with lisa but he's been thinking for a while that things between them#aren't good. he's been trying with her and wants to make it work for ben too. but then he meets castiel..#at first he's just trying to keep cas' existence and presence a secret but cas' cluelessness about human#life quickly results in dean covering shit up in comical aways and close calls. he's exasperated but also#secretly (not so secretly) fond of cas and helps educate him on humanity eventually resulting in#introducing cas to others either intentionally or by necessity as others encounter them together and#dean has to lie and say cas is a new coworker or neighbour or whatever. so cas is suddenly in his life#out in the open and it's nice but the wrong people are looking for cas and now manage to track him down#also: either dean initially found cas seeking refuge in his barn OR he encountered cas out in a field#or somewhere and brought him back to the barn to treat him before realising he definitely wasn't human#or maybe he already realised it but wasn't just gonna leave him out in the open for the wrong folk to#find him. cas was injured so he was no threat and dean didn't have it in him to just ignore the guy#cas was a little standoffish at first but he left dean help him maybe with bandages or something. and he#observed dean with squinty eyes and guardedness and then wide-eyed curiosity and ofc had no concept of#personal space. dean would check in on him daily and cas would learn about his life even as he#didn't share much of his own life - dean thought cas didn't trust him which was fine but also wasn't he#earning the guy's trust? eventually dean was adamant about knowing more about cas. he'd been#trying to research in the meantime but not finding much - ending up with more Qs than As#the reality was: cas didn't tell dean much (or the whole truth) bc he didn't want dean to think poorly of him#and then when the Bad Folk came after cas he realised he'd put dean in danger and ended up leaving#in order to keep him safe. that's when dean found out the truth about cas' kind and how he was different
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also! i hate how ppl will be like you cant tell if you'll have chemistry through texting you have to meet up right away!!! do yall have no online friends?? or at least attempt to know ppl past a surface level who arent in your immediate vicinity??
#this is @reddit guys trying to give dating advice#you obviously have an online presence since ur on reddit#but ig thats as far as it goes??#i really dont get it#like maybe they just mean them and theyre projecting onto every single person in the whole world#cause ive been making long term friends through the internet since i was 13#it works so well for me too since it helps taper social interactions so i dont get overwhelmed#or so i can have a moment to get more thoughts out clearly#i literally ended up in my middle through high school friend group cause i started talking to one of my classmates on facebook#and started playing maplestory with her#so opinions like this really irk me#cause it just feels too black and white#im just ranting a bit#i like looking at random stuff online and seeing everyones opinions#so ill end up on here and start going off about random stuff with little context haha
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genuine question: how do i know if my oc is actually good or not?
or, maybe, 'well-developed and well-designed' rather than 'good'?
esp without feedback from others, lol, because it's hard enough putting snippets out there for funsies, im hesitant to put more out there if i'm just gonna be bringing a shitty stick figure glued to a popsicle stick to show and tell while everyone else is bringing like....meticulously crafted ball-joint dolls and lovingly made amigurumi and so on (/end crappy metaphor)
#everyone's ocs and tavs and such are lovely. it's kinda fun watching yall play#i wanna play too :(((#but not if my guy sucks#but i dont know if he actually sucks or if there's something there and im right to love him the way i do#idk man#im the worst at self-evaluation with this stuff#the default is to assume im failing at what i set out to do#(well my default is to assume I Suck at Everything but that mindset isnt helpful right?#so what am i setting out to do with this? and am i hitting it? or am i getting there? or am i failing? is probably more useful. idk)#(tho maybe 'am i missing the mark and how can i get there' is even more useful than 'am i failing?' but this isnt the point)#people have told me in the past that no. he doesnt suck. they liked reading about him#but if that were actually true then more people would like him. obviously.#but its actually a general question because if i can ever get out of my head and into my creative endeavors....#i'll need to create and design a lot of characters right? like.... i wanna do comics#i want to make my villain knitting circle dating sim#and if i cant even be sure the little guy i made for shits and giggles is any good#how can i expect to do something more in-depth???#i know the general answer is practice. but then if it turns out i am bad at Characters....#then i'll just practice the bad things#feedback is the answer but then that swings back around to i dont wanna just shove garbage in people's faces because thatd be cruel#so i dont know what to do. and all the while i'm just not doing anything and it's not productive and i'm aware#i know part of it is also 'feel the fear. show him off anyway' but i am!!!!!!#nobody is biting!!! and its because they hate hiiiiimmmmm/whiny baby mode#i mean. yall might see more of him bc i might actually write some things but god. nobody will probably bite with those either#ughh....#to the void with love
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clouds by alex g great song to almost tear up to
#date i had on sat cancelled bc she had too much work to do which me too but i was rly looking forward to catching up w her#that plus all the other stuff that has been happening#my friends' house is almost empty everyone is going home#the weather is playing along too#two of my friends are in thailand i miss both of them dearly#ive found myself subconsciously believing in some form of karma over the past few months#even if logically i dont believe in it whenever a string of bad events happen i ask myself what i did to warrant this#i think right now my crime is a lack of self discipline#making false promises to myself and not following through at detriment to my own future#i know this line of thinking isnt helpful but maybe i need it because otherwise its just. that im very unlucky#or that im meant to not be loved or things will just keep going wrong and id really like thst to not be true#the sun is shining a little bit through the clouds#maybe thats a good sign
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Everyone while I’m gone here’s some infos for the one that may not seen the previous posts until I come back 💜
Mutuals can use the tag #korimilook! I’m still on my break and dosen’t see your content so it help me reblog your lovely content while being away 💜 (only group I stan tho or thing I like)
You can dm me for my discord if you wanna talk, cause I may not see my message for a while !
Lastly I made a new Insta aka alex_korimi not long ago so you can all follow me, I don’t post a lot but you can see pet pictures 👀 Anyone can follow !
AND DON’T FORGET :
#do not reblog#if you don’t want me to follow back on Insta cause it’s private you can refuse don’t worry about it 💜#may also block you if it look like a bot just tell me if I do gkdbdjd#but it’s birthday month !!! I will be 25 at the end of the month…………help#but DC comeback and Honey solo 😍 Happy bday to me !!!#Honey actually make his solo debut on the date I was suppose to be born cjbsjdbsj#i also saw the social worker my doc referenced me too couldn’t help me a lot but still did a little so maybe life will be better soon fkdbjd#i miss you all I swear I’m just not talktative at all cause of my bad mood lately 🥺#love you all !!!!#Hope to see you soon 💜#alex.txt
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First one from twitter (link) and the redder one from this post (link).
Couldn't decide which one to do so filled both ( ̄▽ ̄)" Tried to vary those red/green flag questions a little, but they ended up pretty similar. Link to the song is here. Second pic is sadly a bit harder to read (sorry couldn't be bothered to redo it after I noticed).
What else uhh.... these romantic things are always a bit weird to fill with Hawu'li because he doesn't really have any hard "types". If you are a guy and at least somewhat nice to him he'll most likely be open to trying dating... and even if you are a literal villain, he might consider it if you are really pretty (*cough* Zenos). I guess it depends mostly on the fact if the potential partner finds him annoying or not haha.
#neri.txt#purple catboy#ah he's also married to his job in a sense that if someone comes to seek his help he'll usually go#no matter what he was doing before that#there's no small amount of dates that have ended early to someone really needing wol to help right that instant ^^'#he'll apologize and feel really bad about it but will very rarely refuse to go#so you'll have to accept that he's hero first and your partner second#(or healer first partner second if not wol)#oh almost all little dots that are in the center mean he's fine with either#anyway uhhh that's enough rambling for now#might do one of these for other ocs too#once i can choose which one has nicer questions#maybe switch between each character haha#oh right edit to clarify: he did not date zenos#only really strongly considered it while his co wols were yelling “whyyyyy” next to him lol
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[It's big salt hours today apparently, but now I can't even just google the score to the Chief's game--which is the only team I really follow in the NFL at least regularly--without being fucking bombarded with shit about Taylor fucking Swift.
Get her fake ass out of my face. I just wanna see the damn score and some highlights since I don't have a way to watch the games rn. And no. Taylor Swift attending a fucking game is not a damn highlight.]
#[ ☀ ˢᵖⁱʳⁱᵗˢ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵇᵉʸᵒⁿᵈ ;; ᵒᵒᶜ ]#rant cw#bro im just so sick of seeing her everywhere#like fuck algorithms#figure out that i would rather she quietly went away than seeing something about her tour or who shes dating or hanging out w/ bla blah bla#it just irritates me the most because our society is more concerned about fucking dumbass celebrities#who pollute our planet with their private jets and maybe contribute subpar music to society and little else IF THAT#instead of actually like giving a shit that everyone's fucking poor#living paycheck to paycheck#lgbtq+ people are still under attack#none of us under liek 40 will ever own a house#and we'll be in debt our whole lives#and corporations and the REAL elite and rich people like these celebs don't actually give a fuck#but this is what we focus on#and yeah call me out for caring about sports but i say the same thing there#im not obsessed with sports where that's all i focus on obviously#so fuck off#yes the nfl sucks too#they're a corporation and an exploitative one#i also started my fucking period so that's not helping
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It's really weird when you know someone in a context different from how everybody else knows them so you look at them and you still kind of see that person they used to be
#this post is about the boy i dated my senior year who was so incredibly sweet tbh wouldnt be the person i am today if i hadnt met him#but he was so fucked up he had so many issues it was really hard so it didnt work out but i loved him and i think he loved me too#but hes in a moderately successful band now which i just found out about do i looked them up and theyre good#but its so weird because its like i know that when you were 17 you wanted to be an underwater welder#i helped you clean your room at your grandmas house because you were so sad you couldnt do it yourself#i ditched 5th period AP English to sit on the steps behind the auditorium and listen to you talk about whatever#you pushed me on the swings and we took the bus to the movie theater and you liked cherry wraps and you played me my favorite songs#i havent REALLY thought about that guy in years and we were only together MAYBE 6 months but its so weird what you remember about people#and especially how you remember how they made you feel because he made me feel so good like i was in control#all my previous relationships was me trying to desperately please someone who wouldnt do the same for me#and honestly a lot of my relationships since have been the same especially in college and with the one girl who honestly if she called me#today i would drop everything and go be with her again no questions because i cant get her out of my head#but stuff witj him was never ever like that it was so easy it was like breathing even though it ended messy i have 0 regrets#and its nice to know that things are going well for him because honestly he changed my life a little bit#the way i dont give a fuck now is something i learned from him#ill probably delete this later but you know
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