#but maybe ive got it this time?
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thinking back on my sexuality questioning over the years from like 2015 to now is so funny
im straight! > maybe im bi > no im straight (out of denial) > ok yeah girls are attractive im bi > maybe im asexual. no im too young to know > wait do i actually like boys or was it comphet > i think it was comphet im a lesbian > wait im nonbinary > maybe im aromantic but i dont want to think about it > wait im transmasc. maybe im not a lesbian and i was just uncomfortable being perceived as the woman in the relationship bc im not one and so i guess i am bi after all > ok i am aroace. no denying it anymore. i guess it wasnt comphet after all. > wait do i even like men at all. > wait im bigender actually, thats why i keep thinking of myself as a girl sometimes and being jealous of girls because i partially am, but im also partially a boy and overall just mostly nonbinary with little hints of everything else > i think i do like men. theres just exceptions. surely. i just like women like 90% of the tine > i dont think i like men actually. i wasnt thinking of real people when i thought there were exceptions. i guess im a lesbian. again.
like maybe im wrong again and this will continue a few years from now, who knows. but it is funny how it seems like i was just going in circles over and over, stopping just short of the truth because i thought it was good enough without digging deeper
#i think part of why i thought i was attracted to men again after realizing i was transmasc was probably partly wishing i looked like some -#- of them making me think i was attracted to them. and also random fictional characters which i dont think count here!#bc like. if they were real i probably wouldnt like. be all over them#as long as it stays in the realm of fiction its fine but i think looking at real people really made me realize that. yeah. nothings there#being aroace does make figuring this shit out more difficult because i only experience romantic attraction like every 3000 years#but maybe ive got it this time?#i dug deeper than i usually do. i tried to go back to being bi because thats how ive been for 3 years now#but. it just felt wrong now that i had thought deeper. it didnt feel comfortable. and i couldnt ignore it#so. here i am. womanliker once more
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Hero.
#legend of zelda#echoes of wisdom#loz eow#loz#zelda#tri#josh art tag#been meaning to do a full on stained glass drawing for like 2 years now lol#ive had ideas but none really stuck with me until this one#and the reason why is cuz this one was more of a scene! it wasnt just a normal drawing made to look like stained glass#it had what is supposed to be a literal window with someone standing before it looking up at it#also i find the timing of this drawing funny#cuz i just recently changed my shading style to resemble stained glass even more so than usual#cuz for years now ive gottem comments saying#my style reminds people of stained glass#and sometimes i see it sometimes i dont#cuz my shading style changes and sometimes it really did look glass like#but other times i dont think it did?? but i still got those comments??#maybe its like the way i do lineart or block out shapes?#idk but recently when i was growing tired of my previous coloring style i remembered those comments#and decided to lean into it#but now just a little while after that#here i am doing a legit stained glass illustration lol
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Great news for uninsured adults in the USA who want a COVID-19 booster! It now appears that ALL CVS locations are now active participants in the Bridge Access Program. The Bridge Access Program gives out free Covid-19 vaccinations to 18+ adults who otherwise can't afford one, so if you have a CVS near you, please go get one! For others who don't have a CVS near them, please go to vaccines.gov, click on "Find Covid-19 vaccines", fill out which vaccines you prefer (you can mix different vaccines if you have to so i reccomend just marking all of them for the age groups you need), and when the next page loads mark the "Bridge Access Program Participant" option to see only locations that are Bridge Access Program participants. Hopefully, other places that aren't CVS will start participating soon, so just check back every so often to see if there are any updates. The CDC Bridge Access Program website also has more details on what locations will be participating, but only CVS is appearing as an active participant on the vaccines.gov location finder at the moment.
#covid19#covid#coronavirus#vaccines#covid vaccine#bridge access program#CDC#signal boost#please share#coronavirus vaccine#covid19 vaccine#covid 19 vaccine#novavax#moderna#pfizer#also interesting side note but i havent been able to find any vaccine other than novavax near me#perhaps this is just a regional thing or maybe novavax is cheaper to make so those are the most common?#anyway thats why i made sure to tell people its okay to mix up because im going to have to bc i got moderna every other time lol#mayyybe other vaccines will become available in the future??? but ive had close family catch covid left and right so im not waiting#also does anyone know why the bridge program only bridges access to 18 or older individuals?#like i knew the gov didnt care about children but god damn lmao
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truly this one's just for me. I can do what I want foreverrr
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#adaine abernant#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#riz gukgak#gorgug thistlespring#fabian seacaster#việt phục#tbh the thing Im the proudest of in these sets is the skirt hike+áo tấc flap combo. and of course that went to riz lol#will use that again for other things later down the line. for now we play dressup. come play dressup game with me#some of these couldve done with more cookin time maybe... I feel like. for example adaine's gorgug's and fabian's silhouettes are#a bit too similar for my taste#esp. adaine and gorgug. fabian I feel like I just need to make his waist more apparent#and I really like what Ive got with adaine rn... just gotta rethink gorgug#lmao. the dilemma with using áo tấc is it's generally a rectangle#this never stops me however. if I like a guy enough I Will give them a set#it's not about them it's about me. its for me babeyy#also I love the way scabbards are worn in wuxia. like its just dangling back there#guess the amount of fabrics those characters have on mostly immobilize it. just a real good cushion
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one downside to digital mediums of art is that you cant see the tear stains (they just slide down the screen)
#turtlearts#tf2#team fortress 2#not even gonna lie i dont think ive ever struggled to draw as much as i had during this time#these are also a couple months old . and oh my god#i literally thought i was going insane. deep in the clutches of 3/4 head hell and i couldnt escape#like no sleep levels of drawing the same thing again and again until i either got exhausted or just gave up#when the therapist and psych nurse i had at uni said that i have ocd tendencies maybe they were onto something lowkey#side note but thanks to tf2 spy i got a butterfly knife trainer bc i wanted to do tricks#unfortunately i lost the knife :(( but i did learn a couple (really simple) tricks which was neat :)
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cringe ass family ❤
#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#valyrianscrolls#tywin lannister#joanna lannister#cersei lannister#jaime lannister#tyrion lannister#joffrey baratheon#myrcella baratheon#tommen baratheon#2 many of them......8 whole guys...#one day I'll draw a proper family portrait but for now all you get is floating heads. at least this time they have shoulders#um tywin looks weird idk whats wrong with him. like physically i mean. think i made his eyes too big#ive decided to give all of them slay earrings ❤ except i couldnt figure out what 2 give tommen so he doesnt have them 😔#he does have his ears pierced tho ☝ maybe he like just got it done bc hes a baby#im aware thats not how that hat works btw ik the hair's not supposed 2 be out. idgaf#my art
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Doing master studies the only way I know how: Stealing them and making them my guys.
(Barberini Faun)
(The Fallen Angel - Alexandre Cabanel)
(Covent Garden - William Bruce Ellis Rankin)
#obviously. not actually theft...#i was gonna say these are public domain but covent garden actually isnt yet#it will be. in two years.#thats the most different one though like i added a whole new guy..#maybe not the most different. barberini faun is pretty different i just took the post#pose#its barely even a study. thats not true#but. what was i saying.#oh its not theft it's study... the purpose is to learn!!! but also. if im gonna spend like 2 days on something...#its GONNA be my guys#otherwise. idk. i only want to spend 30 or so minutes per study#just to get the notes down and the practice for the skill im working on#i dont get all that much more out of completely rendering a master study. PERSONALLY.#at least definitely not enough to be worth taking 100x longer#but making them my characters makes it worth going all the way!!!#plus it's good practice w like. not just going 1:1 but actually genuinely interpreting whats there so i can manipulate it...#again. personally. this is just how i worm#WORK#youd better worm bitch#uhm... anyways yeah. ive done lots of study but why TF share it LMAO i dont even save it#its just to learn. ive got 1 million other drawings to save and look at later.#once the learning is done it's done its job and i have no need anymore#this is why the only studies i have are from school. i had to save and upload them#well. ok also i dont study as much now BUT in my defense im a full time artist#an hour or so a week is different ok im learning while working too.. i learned how to learn and i do it all the time now#master studies#digital art#my art#illustration#my ocs
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soap's whole deal being sniper and demolitions gets me going bc on the surface they sound so different but when you get into it, you realise it's bc soap's smart
sniping is all math; calculating distances and wind interference and bullet drop. something i think people overlook is he was listed as a sniper first so it can be implied that he's better at it than demolitions. he does more sniping in both campaigns than demolitions work; in capture or kill, ghost specifically calls on him to take down the aq snipers
and demolitions is math with a hit of chemistry; knowing what mixes with what, knowing how much to use, recognising environmental factors and adjusting accordingly. it's not just about the boom; so much work goes into contained/ planned explosions. especially when having enough power for a breacher charge and not bringing down the whole building is the difference between mission success and failure
the chemical bombs he makes in alone can't just be any old cleaners, they have to have the correct reaction to each other; he just knew off the top of his head what would mix with what to create what reaction. he would also potentially have to recognise them by sight/smell bc they would’ve been written in spanish
soap would also have to know architecture; recognising structural integrity and weak points so he knows exactly where to plant a charge to bring it down and how it'll come down
he has an incredible soldier's mind people just forget that bc he's sociable which itself is a skill
we know he tends to buck against orders he doesn't agree with like when he pushes back against ghost in capture or kill and shepherd when he tells them to release hassan
he gets closer to people and sees if he can trust them and that's when he follows them without question. really think about how he talks to alejandro and rudy; he asks about their home and alejandro's family and rudy's relationship with him. those aren't questions you ask a stranger after a few hours of knowing them. that's not even touching on his relationship with ghost
he also deliberately brings people of higher ranks down to his level; talking informally with ghost and giving him a shoulder punch, addressing alejandro (a colonel!!) by his first name and rudy by his nickname despite literally just meeting them. he personalises all of them and it’s in direct opposition to the reason most characters do that; it’s not due to insubordination or lack of respect, the more he respects and trusts someone, the more casual he is with them
he digs into people; he wants to know what makes them tick and that determines if he can one, trust them and two, follow their orders. once he decides that, he's the ultimate soldier; he bleeds loyalty which makes him vicious when that loyalty is taken for granted
he isn't naive or bubbly or insecure; he's an incredibly smart and aware soldier. he's aggressive and bloodthirsty and loyal and intuitive and i love him so much
#i cant believe i never posted the soap meta that got me twitter famous™️💅#as with damn near every piece of characterisation in this franchise soaps is only apparent in subtext and connecting tiny little dots#it is very easy to just pick up his surface personality and think thats all he is#but soaps not a sunshine character#hes not super friendly or bright#hes just willing to talk to people and hes paired up with ghost who never wants to start a conversation#every time i see soap presented as this bubbly airhead thats super sweet and just blows stuff up i lose a year off my life#and i dont blame people for getting this vibe from him but im begging you to look a lil deeper#this isnt getting into his anger or the fact that he is a soldier which automatically makes him a wee bit fucked up#like he is hyperviolent and takes joy in it#we all know ghosts snuff film joke but soaps the one who responds positively to it#he returns the joke and only calls him out on it when he says he wont watch it more than once and even then its teasing not grossed out#and if we take the ‘he tried to join the military at 16’ factoid from 09 as current canon then he very easily could have a rough home life#no one tries to repeatedly join the military early without having some kind of problems#soap knows his worth and his abilities you dont get to be as good and specialised as he is without being completely sure of yourself#we know ghost has an ego but soap constantly butts up against it with his own affirmations#‘you wanna be better than me johnny’ ‘maybe i already am/i will be’ ‘a little helps not so bad eh lt’#being a sniper makes me hate the ‘cant sit still’ hc hes literally an sas sniper he wouldnt be complaining after a few hours of overwatch#i like the adhd hc and maybe he fidgets in his day to day life but the second hes at work hes At Work#tldr soap could be just as complex a character as ghost if cod would stop treating their campaigns as an afterthought and actually commit#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#talk meta to me#john soap mactavish#soap cod#cod mw2#soapghost#save post#call of duty modern warfare#cod meta
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asking and receiving (bonus below readmore)
[ID: A black and white, digital Trigun comic of Vash and Wolfwood. In the first panel is a close up of Wolfwood's mouth as he says, "Vash". Accompanying it is a close up shot of Vash's eye, widen and cheeks flushed. Wolfwood presses a knee against the open space between Vash's legs and says, "Tell me everything you want from me." Wolfwood's face is equally as flushed. He continues to say, "I'll give it to you. Everything." As he talks, a wide shot shows the both of them in white space. Vash is sitting, leaning a little back with both hands pressed against the surface he's sitting on. Wolfwood is in his white dress shirt, stripped of the blazer. He's still leaning in with one knee in between Vash's spread legs, his right hand touching Vash's lips and his left hand behind his back.
The shot closes in on Vash's mouth and Wolfwood's hand against it, pressing down on the lower lip as he says, "You have to ask though. Go on." His hand moves down to Vash's chin, gently holding it. With a shy and uncertain expression, Vash hesitantly asks, "Um... K... Kiss... Please?" Wolfwood, without wasting a second, leans in and kisses him and indulges by pressing deeper, eliciting a small noise of surprise from Vash.
Wolfwood moves away from Vash first and with a smile, asks, "What else?" Vash tugs on Wolfwood's left sleeve, wordlessly budging Wolfwood to give him his hand that was still behind his back. In the next panel, Vash utters, "Hold me..?" He's holding Wolfwood's left hand with his own while his right hand is reaching for his waist. Wolfwood complies, moving his left hand to Vash's shoulder and his right hand continues to touch Vash's cheek. Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"
More comfortable now, Vash leans in to kiss Wolfwood. Wolfwood catches him immediately, pressing his thumb against Vash's lips to stop him before demanding, "Hey. Ask." Vash looks back in surprise and Wolfwood meets his eye with a quiet, insistent look. They're quiet for a moment before Vash leans in again and curtly requests, "Kiss. Me." Wolfwood says "Good", smiling as he lifts his hand away, and meets Vash's lips. In the next shot, Wolfwood had adjusted his position, sitting on Vash's thigh. The hand that was once on Vash's cheek has moved its way to Vash's nape, pushing away the collar of his jacket with his pinky. His other hand continues to grip on Vash's shoulder. Still kissing, Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"
In the next shot, Vash is starting to turn, moving Wolfwood with him. Vash asks, "Let me on top of you?" Wolfwood says, "Mhm" before asking again, "What else?" The next panel shows a close look of Vash's face. He's looking down, flushed and shy just as he had been at the beginning, but now, more decisive. Vash asks, "Wolfwood... Let me have you..?" A panel of Wolfwood taking Vash's hand into his, pulling it towards his chest. The next panel shows Wolfwood lying down where Vash had laid him. Vash's hand is on Wolfwood's chest, covering the cross of his rosary while Wolfwood's hand lingers against his, loosely pressing Vash's hand in place. He looks up at Vash with a shy smile of his own, flushed cheeks. He says, "All yours."
A panel shows a close up of Vash's tender gaze before he leans down to be closer to Wolfwood. The final shot is a front view of their positions, Vash's face turned away from the viewer; Vash is leaning over Wolfwood who's lying down with his right leg draped over Vash's legs. Wolfwood's left hand holds onto Vash's left arm. With finality, Vash says, "...Mine." End ID]
[ID: A follow up bonus comic in a looser, sketchier style. They're laying comfortably in bed when Vash asks, "What was that earlier?" referecing to the start of the previous comic. Wolfwood glances away and says, "To get you used to it. Asking. And getting what you ask for. Since you're alwasy hesitant about it." Vash's eyes widen, tight lipped. Wolfwood continues, "Knowing you, it'll be a tough habit to break..." When he says this, Vash can't help but laugh, unable to deny it. Wolfwood slowly brings a hand to Vash's cheek and continues to say, "So I'll keep trying -- whatever ways I can... to get it through your thick skull." Vash takes Wolfwood's hand with his, kissing the the palm gently. Wolfwood's eyes soften and holding onto Vash's cheek, he leans in to try for a kiss. Vash says, "Hey..." before stopping Wolfwood's lips with the back of his hand, a smug look on his face, "Ask." Wolfwood's embarrassed and with little irritation, asks, "Really?" Vash smiles, saying, "You're in need of practice too." They pause for a moment, Wolfwood looking contemplatively, before he's leaning in again, asking, "May I please kiss you?" Vash looks him in the eyes and says, "Yes." The comic ends with a "chu", indicating an off-panel kiss. End ID]
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#it took me so long to post this even after getting clarification about the maturity warning and stuff#bc i am so shy about it. SDGMKDSGMKSD I LIKE THIS COMIC BUT IM ALSO SO LIKE... AUGHHHH....#when i posted this on twitter though it was like... a few days after ep 11? ive always had the thought circling about vash deserving of#asking for things... and getting what he wants bc he never gets both. doesn't get the opportunity to ask and hardly does he get what he want#maybe the results can go in his favor but at some point along the way he'll still lose something bc nothing can ever go perfectly for him...#and he's usually the one begging and pleading with people to not. do something. it's not even asking at that point it's just straight up#please believe me. please trust me. please don't shoot that person. please don't kill anyone. please don't do it.#and wolfwood.... it was not always this lovey dovey ok. he wouldv noticed this habit miles away and they got into a fight about it the first#time they talked about it bc wolfwood is being hypocritical too. as he always is!!!! but i think as they get more intimate#wolfwood finds ways to make vash understand. smth smth insatiable want and love and desire for wolfwood that makes it much easier to ask.#wolfwood can also just be so compliant. sometimes. which is also an issue in of itself that id love to explore at some point#but he also just enjoys giving into vash fully and completely.#bc he loves him a lot. but anyway#i hope the id is comprehendible.... please lmk if there's something wrong with how im doing it asfdgkdsmgs#ruporas art
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If you're taking ofmd requests, could you please do ed giving steed a rose and then they peck on the cheek or something. I just feel like that would be cute. Np If you're busy though 😊 (I love your stuff btw)
in love 🥰
I wish season 2 had more of the quiet tender moments. It wasn't a big deal to have so much missing since I thought season 3 would make up for it but then we got canceled *sob*
#our flag means death#ofmd fanart#gentlebeard#our flag means death fanart#thanks for the prompt!#Ive got more time so send me prompts if you've got any~#I miss this. maybe I should start dating again?
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if i said i picked up this issue for anything but drunk erik i fear i'd be lying
(Wolverine (2020) #3)
#xmen#xmen comics#krakoa#magneto#ok fine logan can get a tag too. this IS his story after all ja/lkLAJVEAVKLJ#wolverine#snap scans#i should read the rest of this run but its like 47 issues i think so. gonna take some time with that#spliced up the panels so its easier to look at everything. and so i can frame drunk passed out erik on my wall#someone uploaded some of the first page some time ago but 1.) i forgot to rb it 2.) it didnt include the rest of the scene#it ESP didnt include erik fallin face first on the table and his lil sleepin face on the next page like please im gettin cuteness aggressio#im so miffed that these are printed on the same page cause i woulda framed this spread otherwise like PLEASE#this shit got me GIGGLING SO BAD i cant. 'dare i say it .......' he's so unnecessary i love him so much#he's so silly ..... also someone said it best in that whenever erik's drawn like a bug it's the best thing#like look at him. that's a beetle. that's my little beetle and i love him i need to put him in a terrarium and watch him#honestly theres a LOT of things i have scanned and wanna share however i have to do it. Reasonably so to speak#in that i dont want to accidentally drown out all my doodling with comic scans jvEALKVJEAKL#maybe i'll do it sandwich style ... art -> scan -> art -> scan etc etc#that does remind me i have a doodle i wanted to do today. so maybe ill do that and share another thing i got scanned ....#unfortunately i do very much love reading the comics. a troublesome thing cause theres so much i wanna share and talk about#like from this issue too i love how hank describes what charles' mutation feels like#its not a grand thing but i love it whenever charles' telepathy is described and how it effects him physiologically#maybe hank was just Theorizing what it feels like but still ... i love that insight so much .....#i'll share that quote another time- i prob won't scan the page cause it's just a text log but i will say it was from here dont worry#ok ive rambled long enough BYE im gonna go draw charles
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a rendezvous beyond
and a halfway closeup just bc im rlly happy with how the bg turned out lol
#spider man: across the spider verse#spider punk#spider noir#hobie brown#noirpunk#SPIDER LESBIANS!!!!!!!!!!#they are both trans by the way#rebluvio also draws lesbian noirpunk go check that out!!!#but ive been wanting to do my own fem designs for a while haha#then. finally. brown-spider gave me the perfect inspiration#FAT BUTCH TRANSFEM NOIR CANON (im lov her)#i wanted to keep hobie’s usual wicks but then she just looked like. regular hobie#she got her hair down for a date but yall better know its in a pineapple most of the time lol#i like the power move of not changing their names for genderswaps so they’re still hobie and peter#maybe short for something longer idk#anyway they are the wlw couple of all time#classy girls who kill fascists… like what more could you even want#theyre still also nerdy dorks tho its intrinsic to their characters#cw alcohol#i guess?? since theyre in a bar?? sure#spiderdykes
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𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄'𝐒 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐎
#i've been waiting years to draw this like since highschool#so i'm sooo happy to finally be able to put it altogether#maybe not its final version but for now im satisfied ahah#it gathers lots of things i drew lately (3-4 years) : medieval maps / space maps / alchemy symbols and circles#also notice how there is no style consistency in my blog on my last posts ahahaha#also ive got tons of lore idea about hell and i wish i had time to illustrate them and think more about it#map#medieval#fantasy#Dante's inferno#divine comedy#hell#alchemy#circle#litterature#occult#demonology#ink#inferno#dark academia#catabasis
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(You are bound to the Universe's will the same way the moon is bound to this planet, the same way the planet is bound to the sun, the same way a puppet is bound it's strings!!!!!!)
top ten pieces of dialogue ive screencapped because of how normal it is and how normal it made me feel
#in stars and time#isat#siffrin isat#isat siffrin#isat spoilers#sorta? kinda. its got implications...i guess...#sammi draws#[drags my hands down my face] UUUUGGHHHH. i love when theres a protag whos got puppet in them. hows that lack of control for your situation#its just a trope i never get tired of exploring. i screencapped that dialogue specifically to draw smth for it#and honestly? could still make like another 3 pieces all radically different from this one#but i wanna do some sprite redraws next and ive got smth based off “eternity” cooking....maybe ill get to that...who knows..#anyway um. please enjoy? :) siffrin isat i adore you and your issues and maladies
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Pokemon trainer AU, Reborn is the champion meanwhile Tsuna is his apprentice. Tsuna’s design belongs to my friend @Cloud_Knee (Twt or X)
#katekyo hitman reborn#r27#sawada tsunayoshi#reborn#my friend and i discussed about which pokemon would be in their team. eevee and umbreon was ther for their similar looks to r27 lol#flygon is a good candidate bc yk. leon. and for tsuna suprisingly we liked the idea of meloetta (bc meloetta has two forms like how tsuna-#-has his normal vibe and his dying will mode)#for reborn we thought of him having a liking for bug types bc of his bug communication skills. like his seasonal bug thing#we also thought of lore for a whole game which was heavily based on pokemon mystery dungeon bc we wanted death (future arc spoilers oof)#but general beginning plot is: tsuna dislikes having pokemon battles so all his pokemons are non-combat#- somehow he meets reborn (? idk maybe bro trips and got silly and he now owes reborn something). and reborn then seeing how close-minded-#tsuna is he decided to accept tsuna as his apprentice so he finally gets it#we discussed about tsuna also seeing reborn often at a lot of places but never got in contact (bc we thought of him living on a mountain idk#like how everyone cant see through reborn’s disguises but he can. so he’ll just see him around (bc reborn is hiding himself from the public)#as a champion. yeah#yeah thats about it i think. ive forgotten most of our ideas dkdgkgfhfhfj maybe another time
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hit indie developers limbolane is dropping great god grove tomorrow and I can already feel the hyperfixation madness crawling in Please Please Check Out This Game When It Arrives PLEASE!!!!
#ive been following the development of this game for.... over a year? oh god almost 2 years maybe.... a very long time#ever since i got into yugo limbos work and all things theyre invoved in#i played both the older may demo and the current one im so fucking hypedddddd#upcoming game so good it shakes me out of artblock#i almost did a painting before i realized Im Not Finishing That Tonight. oh well#wabbits art#great god grove#ms mitternacht#inspekta#thespius green#cobigail#<- my favorite so far :]#huzzle mug#click clack#also the unnamed 7th guy that looks like a 🗿#expect a lot more art once i completely tear through the game tomorrow
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