#but looking at hte actual game now and actually learning about it

[hearts401]

jokes aside i feel like the fear gas ruins fnaf 4 in a couple of ways but mostly it ruins the silly experience of a child with a horrific fear.

like his plushies turning to monsters, monsters in the closet, it all just FEELS like a nightmare, like the shit you make up in your head in the dark.

hallucinogenic fear gas ruins that. its no longer seeing things in the dark

its no longer a child whos scared in the dark, and is tormented and bullied for his fear which only makes it worse

now its some sciencey bullshit made to confuse fnaf fans even more. its the biggest retcon ive ever seen.

edit: also wtf is his motive??? like yeah yeah remnant/eternal life n all that but how does... fear gas play into that..??

it feels like we're just tryna make william extra evil atp. theres no motive behind this. isnt he already evil for killing children?? i dont see the point of this

[kingandfireheart]

The Lady of the Autumn Court: what the fuck is happening in Autumn (part 2)

As I said in my Eris Vanserra post, it seems that the Lady of the Autumn Court is a bigger piece to the Eris and Lucien puzzles.

We don't know what the fuck has been happening in the Forest House but we do the following:

The Lady of the Autumn Court is/was extremely powerful

Lucien (and to some extent Eris) are mama's boys (even though Lucien has been exiled for centuries)

The Lady met Helion before she was married to Beron

At least one of the seven brothers - Lucien - is Helion's child, but Helion saved the Lady after she had already had some kids (so Eris probably isn't his, even though they both have amber eyes)

The Lady chose to stay with Beron

Beron is aware of the affair between Helion and the Lady

Beron is physically abusive towards the Lady and had tortured Eris

Helion does not know Lucien is his heir, but Eris seems to know Lucien isn't Beron's son

Things that aren't mentioned below the cut, but are interesting:

Eris is the ringleader of the brothers, the commander of Beron's forces, and is Beron's most trusted son (the other three don't even have names)

In ACOWAR, Eris says has never denied Beron anything - except to save Lucien - but is angling for the throne and betraying him in ACOFAS and ACOSF (this reminds me of Lorcan betraying Maeve for her own good in TOG)

Beron wanted to kill Lucien for wanting to leave Autumn and marry Jesminda (this doesn't seem like a good reason if he isn't in line for the throne - or isn't part of their bloodline, but I guess Beron doesn't need a reason to be cruel)

Helion alludes to having trouble at home in ACOSF

The remaining unnamed brothers are all angling for the throne (this reminds me of the Khaganate in TOG and the Cruel Prince)

I got a little carried away with the color coding, but here's every major scene involving and discussing the Lady of the Autumn Court (and some breadcrumbs because I'm convinced SJM is purposeful in her writing)

Rhysand uses the Lady of the Autumn Court taunt Lucien in ACOTAR:

Rhysand’s venom-coated smile grew. “You draw blood from me, Lucien, and you’ll learn how quickly Amarantha’s whore can make the entire Autumn Court bleed. Especially its darling Lady.” The color leached from Lucien’s face, but he held his ground. It was Tamlin who answered. “Put your sword down, Lucien.” Rhysand ran an eye over me. “I knew you liked to stoop low with your lovers, Lucien, but I never thought you’d actually dabble with mortal trash.” My face burned. Lucien was trembling—with rage or fear or sorrow, I couldn’t tell. “The Lady of the Autumn Court will be grieved indeed when she hears of her youngest son. If I were you, I’d keep your new pet well away from your father.”

The Lady of the Autumn Court also helps Feyre with one of her tasks:

A door clicked open somewhere down the hall, and I shot to my feet. An auburn head peered at me. I sagged with relief. Lucien— Not Lucien. The face that turned toward me was female—and unmasked. She looked perhaps a bit older than Amarantha, but her porcelain skin was exquisitely colored, graced with the faintest blush of rose along her cheeks. Had the red hair not been indication enough, when her russet eyes met mine, I knew who she was. I bowed my head to the Lady of the Autumn Court, and she inclined her chin slightly. I supposed that was honor enough. “For giving her your name in place of my son’s life,” she said, her voice as sweet as sun-warmed apples. She must have been in the crowd that day. She pointed at the bucket with a long, slender hand. “My debt is paid.” She disappeared through the door she’d opened, and I could have sworn I smelled roasting chestnuts and crackling fires in her wake.

Rhys (while wearing the mask of hte High Lord) uses her to taunt Lucien again in ACOMAF:

“Little Lucien,” Rhys purred. “Didn’t the Lady of the Autumn Court ever tell you that when a woman says no, she means it?”

“Prick,” Lucien snarled, storming past his sentinels, but not daring to touch his weapons. “You filthy, whoring prick.”

Lucien explaining how he was treated since Beron may suspect he's Helion's heir and as we know from Tamlin: future high lords have physical markers:

His jaw tightened. “As the youngest of seven sons, I wasn’t particularly needed or wanted. Perhaps it was a good thing. I was able to study for longer than my father allowed my brothers before shoving them out the door to rule over some territory within our lands, and I could train for as long as I liked, since no one believed I’d be dumb enough to kill my way up the long list of heirs. And when I grew bored with studying and fighting … I learned what I could of the land from its people. Learned about the people, too.”

“I’d say that sounds more High-Lord-like than the life of an idle, unwanted son.”

A long, steely look. “Did you think it was mere hatred that prompted my brothers to do their best to break and kill me?”

This may not relate to the Lady of the Autumn Court's relationship with Helion, but I'm gathering all the crumbs (why does Eris hesitate before calling his brothers brothers?)

“You hunted me down like an animal,” I cut in. “I think we’ll choose to believe the worst.”

Eris’s pale face flushed. “I was given an order. And sent to do it with two of my … brothers.”

Eris has no love for Beron (he literally asks Rhys to kill him), but he does seem to protect the Lady during the High Lord's Meeting:

“If you want proof that we are not scheming with Hybern,” Rhysand said blandly to them all, ��consider the fact that it would be far less time-consuming to slice into your minds and make you do my bidding.”

Only Beron was stupid enough to scoff. Eris was just angling his body in his chair—blocking the path to his mother.

Helion and Lady of Autumn lock eyes:

The violence simmering off my friends was enough to boil the pool at our toes as the High Lord of Autumn filed through the archway, his sons in rank behind him, his wife—Lucien’s mother—at his side. Her russet eyes scanned the room, as if looking for that missing son.

They settled instead on Helion, who gave her a mocking incline of his dark head. She quickly averted her gaze.

The High Lords discuss the past war:

(also reminder: Eris has Amber Eyes like Helion)

Helion shrugged, the sun catching in the embroidered gold thread of his tunic. “Indeed, though it seems Tamlin is already ahead of me. The Spring Court must be evacuated.” His amber eyes darted between Tarquin and Beron. “Surely your northern neighbors will welcome them.”

Beron’s lip curled. “We do not have the resources for such a thing.”

“Right,” Viviane said, “because everyone’s too busy polishing every jewel in that trove of yours.”

Beron threw her a glare that had Kallias tensing. “Wives were invited as a courtesy, not as consultants.”

Viviane’s sapphire eyes flared as if struck by lightning. “If this war goes poorly, we’ll be bleeding out right alongside you, so I think we damn well get a say in things.”

“Hybern will do far worse things than kill you,” Beron counted coolly. “A young, pretty thing like you especially.”

Kallias’s snarl rippled the water in the reflection pool, echoed by Mor’s own growl.

Beron smiled a bit. “Only three of us were present for the last war.” A nod to Rhys and Helion, whose face darkened. “One does not easily forget what Hybern and the Loyalists did to captured females in their war-camps. What they reserved for High Fae females who either fought for the humans or had families who did.” He put a heavy hand on his wife’s too-thin arm. “Her two sisters bought her time to run when Hybern’s forces ambushed their lands. The two ladies did not walk out of that war-camp again.” Helion was watching Beron closely, his stare simmering with reproach.

The Lady of the Autumn Court kept her focus on the reflection pool. Any trace of color drained from her face. Dagdan and Brannagh flashed through my mind—along with the corpses of those humans. What they’d done to them before and after they’d died

After Nesta makes her speech:

She looked to Beron and his family as she finished. Only the Lady and Eris seemed to be considering—impressed, even, by the strange, simmering woman before them.

After Azriel attacks Eris:

Beron struck—only for his fire to bounce off a hard barrier of my own. I lifted my gaze to the High Lord of Autumn. “That’s twice now we’ve handed you your asses. I’d think you’d be sick of the humiliation.”

Helion laughed

---

Eris, wisely, averted his eyes. And said, “Apologies, Morrigan.”

His father actually gawked at the words. But something like approval shone on the Lady of Autumn’s face as her eldest son settled himself once more.

Thesan rubbed his temples. “This does not bode well.”

But Helion smirked at his retinue, crossing an ankle over a knee and flashing those powerful, sleek thighs. “Looks like you owe me ten gold marks.”

Feyre loses her shit:

Beron shielded barely fast enough to block me, but the wake singed Eris’s arm—right through the cloth. And the pale, lovely arm of Lucien’s mother.

---

The Lady of Autumn was clutching her arm, angry red splattered along the moon-white skin. No glimmer of pain on that face, though. I said to her as I reclaimed my seat, “I’m sorry.”

Her eyes lifted toward mine, round as saucers.

Beron spat, “Don’t talk to her, you human filth.”

Helion tells the story of the Affair:

Helion tapped a finger against the carved arm of his couch. “He played games in the War and it cost him—dearly. His people still remember those choices—those losses. His own damn wife remembers.”

Helion had looked at the Lady of Autumn repeatedly during the meeting. I asked, carefully and casually, “What do you mean?”

--

Helion’s jaw clenched. “The Lady of the Autumn Court was sent to stay with her sisters, her younger children packed off to other relatives. To spread out the bloodline.” He dragged a hand through his sable hair. “Hybern attacked their estate. Her sisters bought her time to run. Not because she was married to Beron, but because they loved each other. Fiercely. She tried to stay, but they convinced her to go. So she did—she ran and ran, but Hybern’s beasts were still faster. Stronger. They cornered her at a ravine, where she became trapped atop a ledge, the beasts snapping at her feet

--

Helion didn’t so much as shift in his chair. “She was still young—though she’d been married to that delightful male for nearly two decades. Married too young, the marriage arranged when she was twenty.”

---

But it was Mor who said coolly, “I heard a rumor once, Helion, that she waited before agreeing to that marriage. For a certain someone who had met her by chance at an equinox ball the year before.”

I tried not to blink, not to let any of my rising interest surface.

The fire banked to embers and Helion threw a half smile in Mor’s direction. “Interesting. I heard her family wanted internal ties to power, and that they didn’t give her a choice before they sold her to Beron.”

--

“How long did the affair last?” I asked. That withdrawn female … I couldn’t imagine it.

Helion snorted. “Is that a polite question for a High Lady to be asking?”

But the way he spoke, that smile … I only waited, using silence to push him instead.

Helion shrugged. “On and off for decades. Until Beron found out. They say the lady was all brightness and smiles before that. And after Beron was through with her … You saw what she is.”

“What did he do to her?”

“The same things he does now.” Helion waved a hand. “Belittle her, leave bruises where no one but him will see them.”

I clenched my teeth. “If you were her lover, why didn’t you stop it?” The wrong thing to say. Utterly wrong, by the dark fury that rippled across Helion’s face.

“Beron is a High Lord, and she is his wife, mother of his brood. She chose to stay. Chose. And with the protocols and rules, Lady, you will find that most situations like the one you were in do not end well for those who interfere.

I didn’t back down, didn’t apologize. “You barely even looked at her today.”

“We have more important matters at hand.”

“Beron never called you out for it?”

“To publicly do so would be to admit that his possession made a fool of him. So we continue our little dance, these centuries later.” I somehow doubted that beneath that roguish charm and irreverence, Helion felt it was a dance at all.

But if it had ended centuries ago, and she’d never seen him again, had let Beron treat her so abominably …

The Lucien Paternity Revelation:

While we spoke, I said down the bond, Helion is Lucien’s father. Rhys was silent. Then— Holy burning hell. His shock was a shooting star between us.

I let my gaze dart through the room, half paying attention to Helion’s musing on the wall and how to repair it, then dared study the High Lord for a heartbeat. Look at him. The nose is the same, the smile. The voice. Even Lucien’s skin is darker than his brothers’. A golden brown compared to their pale coloring.

It would explain why his father and brothers detest him so much—why they have tormented him his entire life.

My heart squeezed at that. And why Eris didn’t want him dead. He wasn’t a threat to Eris’s power—his throne. I swallowed. Helion has no idea, does he?

It would seem not.

The Lady of Autumn’s favorite son—not only from Lucien’s goodness. But because he was the child she’d dreamed of having … with the male she undoubtedly loved.

Beron must have discovered the affair when she was pregnant with Lucien.

He likely suspected, but there was no way to prove it—not if she was sharing his bed, too. Rhys’s disgust was a tang in my mouth. I have no doubt Beron debated killing her for the betrayal, and even afterward. When Lucien could be passable as his own of spring—just enough to make him doubt who had sired his last son.

I wrapped my head around it. Lucien not Beron’s son, but Helion’s. His power is flame, though. They’ve mused Beron’s title could go to him.

His mother’s family is strong—that was why Beron wanted a bride from their line. The gift could be hers.

You never suspected?

Not once. I’m mortified I didn’t even consider it.

What does this mean, though?

Nothing—ultimately nothing. Other than the fact that Lucien might be Helion’s sole heir

[popculturebuffet]

House of Mouse: Max’s Embarrassing Date Review

Hello House Mouses and welcome back to the house of mouse. Another comission by Kev and my second House of Mouse for the valentine’s season. This time we’re not tackling a Valentine’s Episode necesarily, but a romantic one all the same as fan faviorite couple Max and Roxanne finally go on a date.  I always liked Max. Even as a kid when I wasn’t the biggest fan of “A Goofy Movie”, didn’t like the darker patches like the principals office scene or the Pete Hot tub scene.. though in hindsight both had legit greviances with Max... it just dosen’t make either less terrible as the principal still told an innocnet man who wasn’t responsible for what his kid did and was trying his best that his son was going to become a crminal because of one stupid but mostly harmless prank, and Pete.. is just an abusive, unlikeable and unlovable ass in both Goof Troop and Goofy Movie, and I hate how he treats his son, don’t blame his wife for leaving him or taking their daughter and dog, and am really sad he got custody of PJ somehow. And for the record this isn’t ALL petes, just this version. The rest are fine and just the right level of asshole. 

Point is despite my problems with the first film, I had none with the second and even now I like it due to having some really good ideas and concepts while also being gloirously rediclous due to the loveably dated X-Games element. While I do have a spot in my heart for the Dana Hill and Shaun Fleming versions, especially the latter once upon a christmas is awesome, Jason Marsden’s version is the best by the mile having the right amount of ego mixed with self doubt to make him likeable enough to brook him being an ass to his dad a lot. He’s a good character.. and it baffles me Disney NEVER uses him nowadays. No really, the last time he showed up was in twice upon a christmas and no one liked that because he was dating someone who wasn’t Roxanne just to rehash the same plot they’d already rehashed better in Extremley Goofy Movie. I REALLY need to rewatch that one. Hmm.... gonna see if I can squeeze that one into May or later in April. That’s for another time. 

But yeah while he’s at one of the disney parks, that’s it. The character just .. vanished, and hasn’t been brought back in any way shape or form. Though I could see either a Disney Plus reboot of goof troop or a goofy movie with max having his own kids. That could be intresting. Also bring Roxanne back as weirdly this episode i’m reviewing, a goofy movie and now her ducktales cameo are her ONLY apperances. 

Seriously I get she’s not the most fleshed out.. but then flesh her out. Like Max she’s crminally underused and while I get her absence as a character in the sequel, the plot really didn’t need her, he still could’ve been dating her off screen. Though clearly the two worked things out and tried again as this episode came out AFTER extremely did. But did this episode work out? Join me under the cut to find out. 

As i’ve decided is my standard for House of Mouse Episodes, shorts first, then wraparound, then Mickey Mouse live sex celebration. Though I will say i’ve picked up there are two kinds of formats for the show: They either use two of the longer Mouseworks shorts or just one close to 11 minute short, a medium one, and one of the little two minute segments. There might be a break from this in the future, we shall see but for now those ar ethe two standards. This time we have two longer shorts. 

Pluto’s Penthouse Sweet: 

I’ve mentioned in the past I dont’ really get why Pluto is part of Disney’s sensational six along with Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy and Daisy. And I stand by that: While he’s had his own cartoons they just aren’t as entertaining and creative as MIckey’s or hilarous and relatable as Donald and Goofy’s. He’s just an average cartoon dog. He works fine in tandem with Mickey, but on his own he’s just nothing and his spot should be taken by pete, who while not a goodie all the time, again the goof troop version needs to step on a rake and fall into a well.. somehow. i didn’t think my insult through. Point is pete is better.  And this short isn’t BAD .. but to me it’s what some fans THINK the disney shorts are: Bland, maybe one or two good jokes but almost nothing new or intresting. As I found out last year, that’s far from the case, as a lot of the Donald shorts are still hilarious today and a lot of the mickey shorts are shockingly creative, like Thru The Mirorr where he goes .. well thru the mirror into a wonderland like world where all the inanaimate objects are alive and he can shrink and what not via astral projection, or Mickey’s Mechanical Man, which I sadly didn’t know about when I did the MIckey Birthday Special and for some reason isn’t on disne plus. In it Mickey creates a robot and has it box a monsterous looking gorillia. 

How has Mickey piloting this thing but giant sized against various kaiju been a thing yet? And if it has someone tell me. Seriously with all the comics and animated series how. I’d even settle for a Wonderful World of Mickey Mouse episode. Just bring this guy back. Point is there was far more invetnion than it seemed.. at least at first as it slowly died out as they went by the late 50′s. But Pluto just seemed even in their hayday like your standard pet gets into antics thing without the creative slapstick of tom and jerry or the likeablity of sylvester who never could get that asshole Tweety Bird. This is just weak sauce and whiel I could forgive the older shorts, as their from another time and likely lead to say Tom and Jerry... I can’t forgive this which was made probably in 1998 and released in 1999 originally. Comedy had evolved a LOT by that point and unlike the Goofy how to shorts, which are a format that is immortal and still evolved to match the times and felt fresh, these just feel stale and boring and like the last Pluto short I covered this one was a chore to sit through though not nearly AS bad. 

Still though the premise is about the same, Pluto’s left to his own devices, and finds a female dog, though in this case she’s VERY intrested in him. I”m also not entirley convinced she’s a dog, but instead one of Jumba’s experiments and that Lilo and Stitch later had to journey to.. wherever these shorts take place to fetch him. Or more likely the house of mouse. I mean Proud Family, Recess, American Dragon Jake Long and Kim Possible all take place int hat universe, why can’t house of mouse? Also tell me you wouldn’t watch an avengers style team consisting of Kim, Ron, Jake, Penny, Probably TJ, Lilo, Stitch and Donald Duck. If you wouldn’t i’d call you a liar because you would be. 

Seriously the eyes give her away.... just look at them. Very experimenty. But before Pluto can do it like they do on the discovery channel he has to get past the guard dog.. though how he does produces the one great gag of the short, as he BUILDS A GIANT, TROJAN HORSE ESQUE PLUTO OUT OF JUNK. Just holy shit that’s awesome> It gets him inside, only for him to find his lady friend is a bit TOO affectionate and he has to escape, he does so, and MIckey wonders if he missed him etc lame button. This short was a vacuum of comedy outside of GIANT PLUTO. Seriously where’s my disney giant mecha series. YOu have five main characters, and Pluto among with MANY, MANY side characters, frmo scrooge to the boys to hopefully Della, to even possibly pete and mortimer who could have their own mech against the heroes but maybe join them in the last episode. Maybe max and pj could have some, have a father vs son thing with PJ and Pete. I”m just saying, i’d watch it. I know my nieces would watch it. I know my nephews would watch it. Greenlight it. Or i’ll make it.. somehow. 

How to Ride a Bike: Speaking of the How To Shorts, as usual for the House of Mouse era ones.. this was awesome, pretty much what you’d expect, some goofy, pardon the pun, gags about goofy riding a bike and then a fun climax of him in a bike race. Not a ton to add, other than that hamster bike above is genius. Just needs some tweaking. Really funny, really simple, and really good as you’d expect from a good Goofy Short. Easily the best part of the episode. 

Max’s Embarrassing Date: So this was a disapointment. Like i’d try to be nice.. but I had high hopes given this brought Roxanne back, and while the premise was stock maybe they’d do something funny with with it. 

But no the plot is pretty standard, very predictable and fairly obnoxious. Max has a date with Roxanne, and is playing it cool and what not, but is worried his dad will find out.. which he somehow did offscreen. Probably Clarabelle.. I mean they do go out sometimes in this one, wouldn’t surprise me. 

So Max pleads with the rest of the HOM staff to keep him away because he fears his dad will overdo things, which.. is fair and one of the few things I like> He dosen’t want him to overdo it on the mood because this is well.. a first date. He dosen’t want to pressure her or himself and just wants it to be nice and calm. The problem is it’s framed like him once again being embarassed by his dad and having to learn better.

At this point we’d had TWO movies do this already, one of which was only two years old at the time of this episode. This plot is stale as old toast even if it dind’t have goofy in it. And the twist is predictable: the HOM crew end up also overdoing it: Minnie comments on how cute they are and wants candles brought, Daisy gets them a bigger table forgetting how dates work,t hough we do get a great gag of hte 7 dwarves stacked, and Mickey while having .. some.. gopher? I honestly can’t tell who it was, usually i’m better at the cameos. Speaking of which they also have a runner of beast going on a date with Cruella Devile. 

I mean is he cheating on his wife? Is she holding his wife hostage? Is this before belle because we see a post transfomratoin beast too so maybe the House of Mouse is an intersection of space and time? That’s.. actually the most resonable answer I can think of honestly and when i’m focusing more on how the hell your gag works than how funny it is, you clearly failed somewhere along the line. 

Point is Mickey puts his good friend in a pothole, and not only calls max little max, which while an understnadably close family thing to do is still embarassing, but also takes pictures while their eating the spagetthi.. which i’m 100% sure was Huey’s idea nad had Mickey not interrupted, would’ve been tied up down the middle for a lady and the tramp thing. It’s his signature move. Well that and having a panic attack. That’s also one of mine the others being lettterkenny refrences and sex jokes about disney characters.  But yeah this just.. dosen’t work. Them being as embarassing? that’d be fine.. if they weren’t wholly unsympathetic for not only keeping their friend from WELL INTEITONEDLY trying to help his son on his date, something his son shold have no problem with since ROXANNE’S MET HIM. AND IS FINE WITH HIM. AND NEVER CARED ABOUT YOU BEING HIS SON LIKE THE DICKHEADS AT SCHOOL. MINUS BOBBY WHO YOUR FRIENDS WITH FOR SOME REASON. My point is this plot bothers me a lot, and it makes the mickey crew come off like assholes for doing this to thier friend instead of just talking to him like a person. Especially since only ONE of them is a parent and Conviently donald is mostly absent. Likely because he realized this was going to end badly and just agreed to tie the spagetthi like huey taught him to keep his involvment in this shit show and gaslighting his best friend to a minimum. 

Eventually Mickey takes things a step too far and has Sebastian almost sing kiss the girl. Max cuts him off though yelling that he just wants them to back off, he just wants them to relax and he TOLD them this, which makes them come off worse as they KNEW he didn’t want this and did it anyway and never apologize becaue apparently the first rule of house of mouse is never apologize for anything, huh huh. Goofy naturally steps in, tells them off and agrees to serve them and Roxanne finds him entertaining and gives him a nose kiss for being a good dad. He’s a good guy that Goof.  Roxanne then whispers something in max’s ear at the end of the date... which gives him an audible erection. No really. And given his age is vauge here I’m suddenly super duper uncomfortable so let’s move on. 

So max tells them she liked it and wants to come back.. 100% sure that wasn’t what she said but what she said isn’t fit to print and you’ve seen what i’ve said and what I put in the we’ll be right back. Point is he’s happy, though Mickey says we’ll try to make it extra special next time. Mickey.. did you do a space mountain’s worth of pills and cokea nd just forget the entire evening? Did you take some of those hangover roofies/ Why would you do that? Was that pete’s new plan to steal the house of mouse? To drug you guys and make you forget you already paid the rent? Did PJ stop him? Inquiring me wants to know. 

Final Thoughts: Yeah this wasn’t a very good episode. Roxanne is wasted despite having a suitable replacment Roxanne voice in Grey Delise, with no real depth just to rehash the plot of the first and second goofy movies. And this one didn’t have an inexpilicable beatnik cafe, PJ getting laid and finally being happy for once, a standard college fraternity plot  surgeically infused with an out of nowhere obession with xtreme sports that was nowhere in the first film, Goofy in an afro, Goofy finding love, That disco sequence, and a climax in which Goofy carries Brad Garret out of a fire, then Brad Garret probably kills the villian of the film who certainly deserved it. My points are this episode was an underwhelming rehash only saved by some good shippy moments and a good goofy short. It was weak, not all that funny, and not all that intersting.  My other point is that an extremley goofy movie is awesome and also kinda insane and I love it for that. I’m glad I saw this one but i’m really disapointed in how bleh it was. Next time I visit the house of mouse is.. actually in a few days as Pete Does a One Man Show. So yeah already 100% better just by having THAT musical number in it, see you then and if not, there’s always another rainbow. 

[lacquerware]

2020 Recap - My Year in Gaming

2020. What a year for video games. I had big plans for last year, but in the end I did very little besides play video games, and I don’t think I’m alone there since we were all stuck at home looking for a way out of reality. I wanted to do a year-end recap as I’ve done sporadically in past years, but this one will be different than the typical “Games of the Year” format because despite all the games I played in 2020, almost none of them came out in 2020, and some of the things that defined my year in gaming weren't even games. 

Resident Evil 3 Remake (PS4)

RE3 was one of the only games I played in 2020 that didn’t coincide with the deadly pandemic's spread across the US. RE3 is, of course, a game about the spread of a deadly virus in Anytown, USA. It was an appetizer, I guess. 

When the Resident Evil 2 remake dropped in 2019, there were some things I loved about it, and a few things that felt like steps back from the original. I feel much the same about RE3. I had also theorized that a Resident Evil 3 remake would be better off as RE2 DLC than as a separate full-length game, and considering how short RE3 turned out, with some of the best sections of hte original cut entirely (namely, the clock tower), I stand by my theory. 

Oh well, at least Jill gets this rad gun, which for the time being is the closest thing to a new Lost Planet we can hope for anytime soon.

Sekiro (PS4)

Sekiro is the first video game I ever Platinumed. This is partly because conquering the base game was such a spartan exercise that going the extra mile to get the Platinum didn’t seem so bad, but it’s also surely a result of the pandemic. I needed a project and a big win. Who didn't? 

I wrote at length about why I like Sekiro more than every other modern FromSoft game, and also about the game’s cherry-on-top moment that reminded me of blowing up Hitler’s face in Bionic Commando. Please read them!

Death Stranding (PS4)

Release date notwithstanding, this was obviously the Game of 2020. I wrote about it here, here, and here. This game bears the distinction of being the second one I ever Platinumed. It took 150 hours. Only then did I learn I had a hoverboard.

Streets of Rage 4 (PS4)

This is the only 2020 game I played for more than a few hours. In fact, I cleared the entire game at least five times. I still don’t think it captures the gritty aesthetic of the prior Streets of Rages (nor even tries to), but this is probably the best-feeling bup I've played. Huge bonus points for finally bringing back Adam, but in the end I found it hard not to pick Blaze every time.

Blaster Master Zero 2 (Switch)

What impressed me about this sequel from Inti Creates was that it wasn’t just more of the same, even though that would've been fine. BMZ2 builds on its already excellent predecessor with a catchy new format where players can freely cruise the cosmos and stages take the varied form of planets—some big and sprawling, others short and sweet. Hopping at will from planet to planet without ever knowing what experiences and treasure each one held felt like system jumping in No Man’s Sky and island hopping in The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, both of which felt like opening presents.

Dragon Force (Saturn)

Charming, satisfying, and addictive as a bag of chips. Unlike a bag of chips, when it’s over, you can do it all again. And again. And it’ll be different each time! This might be the first strategy game I've truly loved. Better late than never.

The PC Engine Mini

The PC Engine/TurboGrafx-16 Mini seems a particularly justifiable mini-console for people outside Japan because so many missed these consoles entirely, the games are hard to obtain, and the lineup includes titles spanning the entire convoluted Turbo/PC Engine ecosystem—the TurboGrafx-CD/CD-ROM², Super CD-ROM², Arcade CD-ROM² and SuperGrafx, in addition to plain, old standard HuCard games. I myself didn’t know the first thing about these systems before. It’s like reliving the nineties again for the first time. 

Most of the titles included are simple action games that don't require a command of Japanese, but make no mistake: being able to understand Snatcher and TokiMemo does make me feel like an elite special person worth more than many of you. 

(Side note: From a gender representation perspective, the difference between Snatcher and Death Stranding is stark. Virtually every interaction with every woman or girl in Snatcher is decorated with ways to sexually harass her. Guess someone finally had a conversation with our favorite auteur.)

A Gaming PC

I’d threatened to transition to PC gaming for years after beholding the framerate difference between the console and PC versions of DmC in 2012, and last July I finally took the leap, buying an ASUS “Republic of Gamers” (ugh) laptop with an NVIDIA GeForce RTX 2070 Max-Q GPU. It seems like consoles are getting more PC-like all the time, especially with all these half-step iterations that splinter performance and sometimes even the feature set (à la the New 3DS and Switch Lite), so with the impending new generation seemed like a fine time to change course.

In the half-year since, I’ve barely played a single PC game more recent than 2013, but just replaying PS3-era games at high settings has been like rediscovering them for the first time. 

I also finally experienced keyboard-and-mouse shooting and understand now why PC gamers think they're better than everyone else. Max Payne is a completely different game with a mouse. Are all shooters like this??

The USPS

Early in the year, I rediscovered my childhood game shop, Starland, which is now  an online hub known as eStarland.com with a brick-and-mortar showroom. To my delight, it has become one of the best and most modestly priced sources for import Saturn games in the country, and I scored Shining Force III’s second and third episodes, long missing from my collection, for a mere ten bucks each!  

In June, I treated myself to a trio of Saturn imports from eStarland: the tactics-meets-dating-sim mashup Sakura Taisen 2, the nicely presented RTS space opera Quo Vadis 2, and beloved gothic dungeon crawler Baroque. Miraculously, this haul amounted to just around thirty dollars total. Less miraculously, they never arrived. This was the second time I’d had something lost in the mail in my entire life, and also the second time that month. Something was wrong with the USPS, and it wasn’t just COVID pains. We would soon learn Trump had been actively working to sabotage one of the nation’s oldest and most reliable institutions in a plot to compromise the upcoming presidential election.

Frankly it’s a miracle there’s still such a thing as “delivery” at all, and a few missing video games is the last of my worries considering what caused it, but nevertheless this was an experience in my gaming life that could not have happened any other year. I won’t forget it.

*By the way, USPS reimbursed me for the insured value of the missing order, which was fifty bucks. So I actually profited a little off the experience.

Mega Everdrive Pro

I love collecting for the Genesis and Mega Drive, but I will not pay hundreds of dollars for a video game that retailed for about sixty.  The publishers never asked for that, and the developers won’t see a (ragna)cent of the money. I'm also far less inclined to start collecting for Sega CD, since the hardware is notoriously breakable, the cases are huge and also breakable, and the library just isn't that good. 

Still, I'd been increasingly curious about the add-on as an interesting piece of Sega history, so when I learned Ukranian mad scientist KRIKzz had released a new Mega Everdrive that doubled as a Sega CD FPGA, I finally took the plunge into the world of flash carts. This has proven a great way to play some of the Mega Drive’s big-ticket rarities I will never buy—namely shmups like Advanced Busterhawk Gley Lancer and Eliminate Down—as well as try out prospective additions to the collection. I never would have discovered the phenomenal marvel of engineering and synth composition that is Star Cruiser without this thing, but now that I have, it’s high on the shopping list.

The Mega Everdrive Pro is functionally nearly identical to TerraOnion’s “Mega SD” cartridge, but slightly less expensive, comes in a “normal” cartridge shell instead of the larger Virtua Racing-style one, and supports a single hardworking dude in Ukraine rather than a company with reportedly iffy customer service.

Twitch

Getting a PC also resolved issues that had long prevented me from achieving a real streaming setup, and much of my gaming life in 2020 was about ramping up my streaming efforts. I even made Affiliate in about a month. Streaming has been a great creative outlet and distraction, as well as a way to connect with other people during the COVID depression and structure my gaming time. Find me every Monday through Thursday 8-11pm Eastern at twitch.tv/lacquerware.  

Metroid: Other M (Dolphin)

PC ownership also gave me access to the versatile Dolphin emulator, liberating a handful of great Wii exclusives from their disposable battery-powered prison. 

One of the Wii games I fired up on Dolphin was Metroid: Other M, a game I’d always wanted to try but had been dissuaded by years of bad publicity and the fact that I never had any goddamn batteries. I know I should temper what I’m about to say by acknowledging that I was playing at 1080p/60fps on a PS4 controller so my experience was automatically a vast improvement over that of all Wii players, but I’m increasingly confident Metroid: Other M was the most fun I’ve ever had playing a Metroid game. I haven’t decided yet if I’m willing to die on this hill, but I will just say that if you like the Metroidvania genre in general and aren’t particularly attached to the Metroid series’ story or its habit of making you wander aimlessly for hours, there’s a very high chance you will enjoy Other M—especially if you play it on Dolphin.

Don't Starve Together (PC)

Don't Starve is the only game my friend Jason plays, so last year I tried to get into it with him. I respect this game's singular devotion to the concept of survival, but make no mistake: every session of Don't Starve ends with you starving to death. Or freezing. Or getting stomped by a giant deity of the forest. The entire game is staving off death until it inevitably comes. Even when death comes, you can revive infinitely (in whatever mode we were playing), which means even death is not an end goal. There is no end goal. You don't even have the leeway to "play" and create your own meaning as you do in similarly zen  games like Dead Rising. 

Don't Starve is a game for people for whom hard work is the ultimate reward in and of itself. Don't Starve told me something about Jason. 

G-Darius (PS1)

In the early fall, Sony announced they were dropping PS3, PSP, and Vita support from the browser and mobile versions of their PSN Store, and since the PS3 version of the store app runs like a solar-powered parking meter in Seattle, I decided this was my last chance to stock up on Japanese PSN gems. 

Among my final haul, the PS1 port of G-Darius proved an instant favorite. Take down the usual cast of mechanized fish in a vibrant, chunky, low-poly style that perfectly inhabits the constraints of the original PlayStation hardware. I believe this is the first Darius game that lets you get into giant beam duels with the bosses, which is quite definitely one of the coolest things a video game has ever let you do. The PS1 port is also surprisingly feature-rich, including some easier difficulty levels that present an actually surmountable challenge for non-savants.

This one’s coming to the upcoming Darius Cozmic Revelation collection on Switch alongside DARIUSBURST, a good-ass romp in its own right.

Red Entertainment

In my effort to shine a tiny spotlight on some of the unsung Interesting Games of gaming, I found myself drawn again and again to the work of Red Entertainment. First there were cavechild headbutt simulator Bonk’s Adventure and twin shmups Gates of Thunder and Lords of Thunder on the PC Engine Mini. Then I streamed full playthroughs of the PS2’s best samurai-era, off-brand 3D Castlevania, Blood Will Tell and the Trigun-adjacent stand-‘n-gun, Gungrave: Overdose. Then I was dazzled by Bonk’s Adventure’s futuristic spin-off cute-‘em-up, Air Zonk, which was also sneakily tucked away on my PC Engine Mini in the “TurboGrafx-16” section. It turned out all these games were made by the same miracle developer responsible for Bujingai, the stylish PS2 wushu game starring Gackt and a household name here at the Lacquerware estate. How prolific can one team be???

Month of Cyberpunk

In November, I started toying with the idea of themed months on my Twitch channel with “Cyberpunk month.” It was supposed to be a build-up to Cyberpunk 2077’s highly anticipated November release, but holy shit that didn’t happen, did it? Still, I always find myself gravitating toward this genre in November, I guess because I associate November with gloom (even though this year it was sunny almost every day). A month is a long time to adhere to a single theme, but cyberpunk is such a well-served niche in gaming that I could easily start an all-cyberpunk Twitch channel. The fact that we’re so spoiled with choice makes Cyberpunk 2077’s terrible launch all the more embarrassing. Here are just some of the games I played (and streamed!) in November:

Ghostrunner Shadowrun (Genesis) RUINER Remember Me Transistor Rise of the Dragon (Sega CD) Shadowrun (Mega CD) Cyber Doll (Saturn) Binary Domain Shadowrun Returns Blade Runner (PC) Deus Ex: Human Revolution Deus Ex: Mankind Divided Observer

Shadowrun on the Genesis gets my top pick, but the two most recent Deus Ex games are great alternatives for those looking for something in the vein of 2077 that isn’t infested with termites.

Lost Planet 2

Every year. I played through it twice in 2020.

Dead Rising 4

I slept on this one too long. While it's a far cry from the original game, it's easily the most fun I've had with a Christmas game since Christmas NiGHTS. This is the game a lot of people thought they were getting when they bought the original Dead Rising with their new Xbox 360--goofy, indulgent, and pressure-free.

Devil May Cry 5: Vergil (PS4)

Vergil dropped for last-gen consoles in December and breathed a whole lot of life into a game that was already at the head of its class.

Nioh 2

I’ve only played a few hours of Nioh 2 because I promised my friend I’d co-op it with him and wouldn’t play ahead. But he’s a grad student with two small children. Nevertheless, Nioh 2 is my Game of 2020.

And that's it! Guess I'll spend 2021 playing games that came out last year, and maybe eventually getting vaccinated? Please? 

[thefirstcourtesan]

The Royal Recap: A Tale of Two Houses, Chapter 1

Hello all! It’s time for my thoughts and reactions to the first two chapters of The Royal Masquerade. Most weeks I will have this out earlier than Friday, but as many of you know, I was way from Friday to Wednesday and am playing catch up.

I loved The Crown and the Flame. Loved it so much. I do like the Royal Romance, but it was the TC&TF connection that has me so excited about this book, a return to teh world of teh Five Kingdoms and the first Choices characters I ever fell in love with. I play wth two devices so my recaps note that. I don’t search out other playthroughs though, this is just based on my own play and reaction. I will point out connections to other books and my random thoughts and so on. I also don’t necessarily go chronologically, if a point comes up twice, I will discuss it all at once.

So with that settled, let’s start!

The book tells us that our story is taking place in 1600 A.D in the Kingdom of Cordonia, so 400 years before modern events and a later comment about it being 300 years since humans had magic makes me think it is probably roughly 400 years since the events of TC&TF, putting us at the mid-point between the two lores. More on that later.

But first, we have to choose what we look like! 5 faces and 3 of them are from OH. Oh hello again, I think we are all sick of you. One is from ACOR and the 5th is new. I have to choose two, so I chose the ACOR face and the new one. We also have to choose a name and a house. Here are the choices for house:

I am a little salty that we couldn’t choose to be a Nevrakis 😂 as that was my number one hope for this book. Oh well. I guess I’ll choose from these three.

I chose House Rosario on one playthrough and House Everhart on the other. Meet my MCs, Lady Viola of House Rosario and Lady Livia of House Everhart:

Both names were chosen for a reason, one as a nod to one of my favorite Shakespeare plays (and a fitting one I think) and the other a reference to my own fanfic canon.

Now, to the story, we start while dancing with a mysterious stranger. The game asks us if we are interested in men, women, or both. We will see later that this choice impacts the gender of the LIs, which is a neat way of blending the sexuality choice of TE with the LI gender choice of Perfect Match/High School Story: Class Act/Platinum.

I chose interested in men on one device (Livia) and both on the other (Viola). Interesting note, I got blonde male Hunter as my dance partner in both, though he is obviously not identified yet. There is some flirting and they lean in for a kiss and then... We are rudely interrupted.

Turns out it was just a dream and we are brought to the present and the library where the MC works under the stern Head Librarian Kana. We learn that we were raised in a respected family, but given to the library. Given the nasty atttude of our aunts when we meet them, I am going to guess that happened when our parents died. But for now, back to the drudgery of writing up manuscripts on soil samples.

We are interrupted again, but this time not by Master Kana, instead it is a pretty noblewoman, who we quickly learn is our big sister Annalise. She quickly tells us that she is here to whisk us away from the library and sneak us into the Royal masquerade ball! Alright, sis, I already love you. I love her even more when she firmly puts Kana in his place before whisking us away.

She takes us home to the family estate and we reveal we have been away from some time. As soon as we get inside, we are introduce to our aunts Zya and Elise. Zya is terrible and sour and hates us, she is the one who reveals that the MC is an “adopted stray” and I am sure she is the one who gave the MC to the library. Elise doesn’t seem as bad.

Annalisa has no patience for Zya’s nonsense and also reminds her that she is the head of the family and that she wants the MC by her side. You rock Annalisa and I love you already! Zya backs down and Annalisa whisks is away to get ready for the ball.

Upstairs we meet Vasco, an older gentleman who seems to work for the family and is the last member of the household (at least for now) and we are presented with a magic mirror. Side note, I love this, becuase I have always had strong Snow White vibes from TRR and my MC Eleanor and the magic mirror just ads to that and I love it.

We learn that there are a few magical objects left in the world and that only the noble families posses them and that Queen Kendra has gifted this mirror to our house! We also learn the names of the other royal houses: Vescovi, Fierro, Beaumont, and Nevrakis. At some point I am going to sit down and figure out how they match up to the family’s of the Five Kingdoms and modern day Cordonia. So far the only consistent between the three Books is our beloved Nevrakis family.

So this magic item makes clothes appear out of nowhere (for diamonds of course), I guess this is what you do when you don’t have boutiques in every noble residence 😂. We get our first diamond dress option and it is the same one we were wearing in the dream at the beginning. TRR did this too, let us wear a dress in teh flashforward at the beginning of the book and then make us pay for it later. At least this time it is a dream. If we don’t like that dress, we are given a free black dress provided by Vasco.

The free dress is actually very nice. The diamond dress is too, but it is so close to Aster colours and that is the house I didn’t choose so that annoys me a little. But I do love the jewelled belt and I have always adored that shade of blue (it was the color of my bridesmaid dresses). Interesting, the free dress is very similar to Vasco’s outfit and I don’t think that is a coincidence. I ended up choosing the diamond dress for Livia and the free one for Viola.

After we choose our outfit, we talk a little bit with Annalisa and Vasco. Annalisa promises to free the MC from the drudgery of the library and we learn that our house is about to be announced as the newest noble house. Apparently our parents made lots of money and Annalisa has charmed the queen and the result is that we are being granted official status and the power and influence that goes with it.

We travel to the ball and then we are introduced to Queen Kendra, though we don’t realize that is who it is at first. Kendra is very friendly to the MC and they have a brief chat about art and then we are whisked inside because there are other nobles waiting to greet Kendra.

The MC eagerly eats some bread (because they are starving her at the library) and Annalisa generteases her about it, before departing to find a bed mate for the night. Between Annalisa and Hunter (as we will soon see), we get the impression that Cordonian court is very sexually liberal, which is awesome. I am putting PB on notice that I expect my MC to be able to indulge as well, no waiting a whole book for a kiss.

The MC heads to the food table (good plan) but is distracted by a gorgeous person in a sun mask who is being fawned over by noblewomen. However, despite their admirers, we are the one who catches their eye and we get the chance to choose their appearance (and gender, if you picked you are interested in both). I picked Asian male for Viola and white male for Livia. (Note- From this point on, I will be referring to them as male because both mine are).

This mysterious noble in the sun mask is the same one from our dream (we’ll potentially 😂) and he flirts with us, ignoring his fawning audience in favour of us and he asks us to dance, telling us to meet him on the dance floor at the beginning of the next song. But before we can, it is time to meet our next LI.

We have attracted the attention of a mysterious person in a moon mask, who seems to realize that we don’t belong. We get the chance to customize their appareance and I chose the black male for Viola and I chose the Hispanic/Mediterranean (I don’t know what race they are supposed to be) male for Livia. (note- Like with Hunter, from this point forward I will be referring to them as male).

He asks us for our invitation, but we deflect him and there is a chance for some flirting before he asks us to dance. We now choose who to dance with. Livia chooses to dance with the man in moon mask and Viola with the man in the sun mask.

Both men take being rejected well and then we begin dancing with our chosen partner. The conversation is similar but not the same. The man in the sun mask is smoother, more flirtatious while the man in the moon mask is a little more reserved, as if he is unaccustomed to this kind of thing. The man in the sun mask lifts the MC, while the man in the moon mask dips her.

I really like this scene and how it differs between the two men to accommodate their personalities, because it lets you get a feel for them. Both want to know who the MC is, but they approach it differently, with the man in the sun mask desperately curious and the man in the moon mask more suspicious/intrigued and more direct.

The dance ends and the man in the moon mask comments he still knows little about the MC, while their is a crowd ready to pounce on the man in the sun mask who is unwilling to let hte MC go just yet. Both men suggest that the MC join them on the balcony to continue their dance and we have our first diamond scene!

Again, the diamond scene is similar, but not identical. Again, the man in the sun mask is very comfortable and very charming, while the man in the moon mask is more reserved but very observant. In both cases, you dance and then the masked man tries to guess your identity. The man in the sun man guesses foreign noble (though if you tell him the truth, he is not surprised) while the man in the moon mask accurately guesses who you are. Then it is your chance to guess who he is, if you choose “noble from important house”, the man in the sun mask agrees and the man in the moon mask demurs, but both refuse to name their house, saying it changes how people see them.

The two of you admire the view from the balcony, his hand covering yours, and then it is time for you to remove your masks. Both men seem to be quite impressed by the MC’s appearance and in both cases, they are about to kiss her when they are interrupted by Vasco (who I am so suspicious of, dude is up to something).

Apparently, Annalissa is about to give the Queen the wrong invitation. So we say goodbye to our mystery man, though we do get a name. You can choose their name, though the defaults are Hunter and Kayden. I kept Hunter (becuase I am sure it is a nod to Dominic Hunter) but changed Kayden to Dante on both devices and will be referring to him as such.

We hurry to the throne room, but find two dead guards and get there just as an assassin plunges a knife into Queen Kendra! The Queen advises for us to flee with her dying breath and the assassin threatens us. The assassin reminds me of the shadows from TC&TF and that makes me wonder who sent them, a foreign power or someone within Cordonia? Right now, we have bigger worries, because our sweet sister is lying unconscious on the floor!

And end chapter one.

I thought this was a great start, it introduced the world and set the tone of one of glitz and glamour but also secrets and a darker side. I feel like that may be what this book is about, about everything that lurks Heath the glittering surface of court and I am here for it.

Also, visually this is such a beautiful book. The background, the characters, the gowns, everything is so beautiful. I love period pieces and I am already drawn into the world that they have built and I am so excited to be exploring this portion of Corodnian history!

[dicecast]

Blast to the Past: Planescape Torment tutorial

Ok so if we really want to talk about 

Now planescape torment as a game is mostly strongest in the start, the game reaches its peak once you leave for the Outlands and doesn’t really recover until the very end at the return to Sigil, something which I wish the enhanced edition would have fixed.  But I think one of the reasons why this game is so beloved is in large part due to its strong opening.  And whats funny at first is that it is actually closer in structure to the Pathfinder:Kingmaker situation than the Baldur’s Gate I opening.  You awake in a crisis and need to escape from a building with different rooms having different mechanics be introduced.  And while it is a lot faster if you don’t do the sidequests, you can’t just finish the tutorial in 5 mins the way you can with Candlekeep.  Despite that, I think Planescape surpassing even Baldur’s Gate in its opening.  Lets talk about why

1) Aesthetic.  One of the most powerful thing about Planescape is that it has a very specific art direction, one which I have not seen in any fantasy before or sense, this philosopher hobo view of cosmic metaphor.  While PS:T is undeniably part of the D&D universe and is just as much fantasy as Baldur’s Gate, it feels wholly unlike the former, even though both games are canon in the same universe.  The game specifically removes most of the trappings of fantasy, there is a single sword and a single suit of armor in the whole game (the suit of armor is a companion), there are not dragons, there are no goblins/orcs/giants/drow/Mind flayers, you never explore ancient ruins of a lost civilization or restore a monarchy, you don’t even defend a village from monsters.  

   This game abandons the conventional trappings of fantasy instead having an aesthetic of...well a slum.  Your initial weapons include an iron spike, a scalpel, a plybar, a severed arm, and a crunch, you travel to sewers and are murdered in like 40 different ways.  And the Morgue is an absolutely great to place to set the tone, the whole place is full of images of emboldening fluid, dissected corpses, and body parts, but rather than being used to be creepy or evil it is actually rather nice.  They aren’t enemies to be destroyed...they are you.  This place of corpses and preservatives is where you belong, because you are after all, a corpse who keeps refusing to die.  

2) it sets the tone, specifically in not judging a book by its cover.  The Mortuary could easily have been a sinister realm of necromancers with their zombie servants doing experiments among the dead, but the tutorial puts you in the framework of not assuming that the sinister is evil.  A floating skull can be your friend, you don’t have to attack the zombies, and the weird necromancers in robes talking about True Deaths are just stoic goths.  In a Planescape setting and especially in a game that is as role-play heavy as this one, it is important to communicate to the player that they need to take the weird stuff on its surface rather than assume things are going to follow a standard fantasy storylines.  Maybe the two demon ladies can be your friend, maybe its best to talk to the creepy hag, assumptions will not help you in this game 

3) Its not entirely linear.  A lot of the content is optional If you want, you can get through this tutorial in maybe 10-15 mins if you skip the side content.  Also much of the content has multiple resolutions depending on your play style, making it much more an example of self expression rather than “I need to pick the locks now” 

4) It is an actual story segement.  My issue with Kingmaker or Bloodlines is that the tutorial is just....a place you learn the mechanics and nothing more, while the Morgue is directly related to the plot of Planescape.  You need to learn about yourself as the Nameless One, you get to meet and learn about Morte, you meet Dhall and find out more aobut the story,  You meet Deionarra, and most importantly where you wake up is also the entrance of the final boss.  The Tutorial level is absolutely necessary to understand the story of the game and is infact more necessary than the whole Curst nonsense. \

5) It establishes the mechanics.  Despite using the same engine and being set in the same universe as Baldur’s Gate, the experience is totally different in terms of gameplay.  PS:T needs to introduce how important dialogue options are, that your stats can effect the various conversions, that you are immortal and that htis game has a much more visual novel/adventure game feel to it than the more combat oriented BG.  lets contrast some points real quick

In Candlekeep, you have to do an errant for a guy and normally he gives you some money but in one of my playthroughs he gave me a +1 dagger.  I didn’t know why the difference until I looked it up and was like “oh I had 18 charisma”.  Meanwhile planescape torment, it informs you about the different stat and their effect on dialogue in order to let players know to plan their stats accordingly

To use another example, in the Mortuary there are a bunch of giant skeletons chilling around in the upper level.  In BG that would be a challenge to defeat, but in PS:T, talking to them while having this one book and a high enough Int means you can deactivate them, getting XP for each one and looking their armor to learn spells.  This is going to be a hallmark of PS:T and it is established here

The fact that you can get through this whole level only killing a single zombie is right away a major different from BG, where you kill like 90% of the cast.  

6) It sets the tone of Planescape.  One of the reasons why this game is so beloved is that PS:T kinda delivers on the RPG promise.  There are like 20 zombies in this level and almost all of them has a different way of interacting with them and unique appearance.  One of them has stitches that you can cut with a scapel to find a not, one is holding a book, one losses its arm that you can lose as a club, there is a zombie who is actually a human spy dressed up as a zombie (who can dress you up too) almost everything in this level has a unique method of interactivity, and that is before Morte tries to hit on them.  Honestly one of hte failings of PS:T is that no other part of the game is as interactive as this particular level.  

7) You can return to the Motuary throughout the rest of the game, making this place useful.  Even if you do every single side-quest you can first time through, there will still be more to do. You come back here when you die, you need to go here for the final dungeon, some quests take you but most critically there is a whole zombie sidequest here.  later in the game a crying zombie will give you the power to talk to the dead.  If you think of it, you can return to this place and talk to every single zombie here, each of whom has their own story, a few of which are quite elaborate, and one of them is your old buddy who has some items for you.  

In short, PS:T is to me the ideal RPG tutorial (though I do wish I could get through it a bit faster on a second play-through) because it feels like an actual part of the game rather than simply “the part where you do the mechanics” 

Next time I might finally talk about why the tutorial for Pathfinder;Kingmaker is so bad...but I might not bother, its boring. 

[elegantminecraftknowitall]

Minecraft Monster Traps

Educators have had many challenges over the past decade as the educational system has undergone change driven by new government and group insurance policies geared toward enhancing educational outcomes and shifting focus in step with changing career and trade landscapes. And like every giant trade, there was much disagreement internationally with among the modifications, most famously in recent time adding the "A" for arts to STEM to evolve it into STEAM education. And as blended and multimodal learning positive aspects more and more credibility, a common query that invokes debate is whether or not STEAM academic games can be used as a severe instructional software within the teacher’s toolbox. Games naturally assist this form of schooling. Some consultants argue that games are, at the start, studying techniques, and that this accounts for the sense of engagement and leisure gamers experience. STEAM educational games are designed to create a compelling complicated problem space or world, which players come to know by self-directed exploration. Their meta-game and quest systems are designed to deliver just-in-time studying and to use information to help players understand how they are doing, what they should work on and the place to go next.

All wayz speel chek you're maps. I HTE porly speled signal nd boks

Climb the very best Mountain You'll find

A fantastic screenplay

10 months in the past

8 | TOY STORY 2 Adventure MAP [ENG] [PL] [ESP]Minecraft Project

Type %appdata% into the Run program, then press Enter

Roblox: Free Game for the Social Crew

Craft 10 wood strain plates

To kill the monster with this lure, you could use a bow and shoot on the monster twice through a hole in one of many doorways with a bow and arrow. You was once in a position to make use of a sword and swing through the holes in the door, however that may simply open the door. If you happen to do accidentally open the door whereas a creeper is trapped, rapidly close the door and back up fast, so the creeper does not blow up the trap or you. This trap is one of the simple to construct, in addition to the door lure. It mostly simply entails digging a pit, and no crafting is totally mandatory. Dig a gap 4x4. Place glass, or one other block, lining two sides, as depicted to the proper in image 1. Then, dig down any variety of blocks in the 2x4 space in the center of the opening. I dug down 6 blocks further than what was already dug, for a total of 7 blocks deep.

Just a few extra flowers may also grow in the basic biomes, and new mushrooms will pop up in every single place, including inside of caves. Speaking of the configuration file, which may actually be the perfect part of this mod. Everything in the mod is adjustable, from the amount of water on the earth, to whether the brand new gadgets are added to dungeon chests, even the doable places for villages and strongholds can be modified. You may also disable or regulate how frequent every area is, in addition to disable the adjustments to every individual vanilla biome. As great as these options are, in all probability the biggest cause for the mod's popularity is that there really is little or no that may be thought of mistaken with it. There are sometimes extreme differences between biomes which could make it extremely apparent once you spot a new space, but that was already an issue in the original game. Just like in vanilla Minecraft the villages can generate into hilly terrain and turn out to be slightly odd looking, although this can be exacerbated by the higher terrain of the mod's extra mountainous areas. And one other difficulty alongside borders is that taller areas can have the terrain of close by biomes proceed to look fairly far up their sides, which makes for weird conditions like beach sand "climbing" halfway up the Alps. This again, is a normal Minecraft situation, and really virtually all of its issues are basically just the sport's normal issues strengthened by the mod's love of variety. Otherwise, it is extremely stable and compatible with just about every other mod. Sign in or join and publish utilizing a HubPages Network account. Zero of 8192 characters usedPost CommentNo HTML is allowed in feedback, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments will not be for promoting your articles or different sites.

I really dig Crowfall. I actually have my share of bias as an investor, however I’ve been following this effort since before they even introduced their Kickstarter. Right off the bat, I felt like Crowfall was going to be something special. I don’t expect it to be everyone’s cup of tea even after they get to release, however I definitely think they’re bringing an thought that may change the way in which video games are made from now on. The idea of randomly producing maps isn’t a brand new one, nor is PvP. Smashing the 2 collectively to create dynamic worlds that live, change, and die over time is new, though. What’s more, it scratches an itch that I believe has been plaguing the MMORPG style for a really long time. The late 90s kicked off a two-decade-long run with MMOs. For the primary a number of years, avid gamers would pick their favorites from a relatively small listing of options and then stay with that game for a 12 months or two earlier than moving on to the next. As time’s gone on and extra MMOs can be found, many from smaller and really artistic studios, the time players stay with any of them has persistently gotten shorter.

An asteroid is bearing down on the planet of Future City. A planet is on the trajectory of the asteroid. Future City is in Danger. which minecraft mob are you . Go to %appdata% from run. Go to the .minecraft/saves folder. If the “saves” folder does not exist you may create saves folder. Drag extracted map folder into that folder. Atropos is the identify of the eldest of the three sisters of destiny in Greek mythology, the one accountable for slicing the thread of a mortals life with the shears. It's also the title of this very cool map! Go to your %appdata%/.minecraft folder. Open the “saves” folder. Unzip the map you downloaded, and put the unzipped folder into the saves folder. You should now be all set to benefit from the Atropos 2 map, have fun! Puzzle maps aim to check your drawback-solving abilities. They usually require you to complete a certain task with a view to proceed to the next puzzle. PortalCraft map Minecraft PE relies on the favored recreation. This map requires PE Portal gun mod by Desno365. Kagio - Minecraft Resources will have loads of challenges where you need thing logical.

[aqours-remade]

Thoughts on Pillowfort so far.

I’ll do more posts when the site finally stops crapping all over the bed and works but here’s my analysis so far.

I won’t lie, I discovered tumblr when I was 18 specifically for RPing, so that does to an extent make up a big aspect of my thoughts, and I want to share it with both people who intend to be regular users and roleplayers in general.

Good aspects of pillowfort:

Community system is a feature not given by tumblr or twitter, and in an era where forums are becoming more of a niche if this takes off you’ll be able to experience forum-based interaction in addition to everything else.

Community system also gives a place to users who don’t like interacting with people heavily and so publicly like twitter and tumblr a place to use the site even if their blog itself is relatively untouched.

When you delete an OP post it deletes it from everyone else’s blog too. So if something goes bad with a post or you get embarrassed, blam! Its gone everywhere. Of course, this also means we might lose some good posts now and then...

Able to make reblogs and stuff private like on twitter.

Pillowfort’s TOS protects your intellectual property as an artist.

Built-in blocklist.

You can export your blog to your new pillowfort account.

ToS regarding harassing, callouts, mob mentality and the like specifically exists to oppress kinblr for the most part is very fair and reasonable and is specifically designed to keep the site relatively drama-free and actively punishing those who create lots of problems. People who do not like the drama associated with this website or the feeling of screwing up will be relieved by that.

When it works, the actual system for styling your post basically already has absolutely everything you could already want:

Bad aspects of pillowfort:

THE SITE DOESN’T FUCKING WORK YET YOU CAN’T USE THE WEBSITE IN ITS CURRENT STATE WITHOUT IT CRAPPING OUT EVERY 10 SECONDS.

I’m not saying that to be sarcastic or anything I genuinely cannot recommend the site in its current state until pillowfort’s team can stabilize the servers. As it is I can only recommend it if you’re determined to snag a good canon url now. It has a small anime community (rn its mostly Marvel) and not too much of a gaming community yet so... if it does take off now’s your chance to snag one-word name urls and just kinda bide your time until its actually functioning, that’s certainly an idea. I’m very happy I was able to get the dream url there that I wasn’t able to get here... but with the site Error 500ing me so much I can’t really use it.

We‘re still not 100% what the NSFW situation actually is, as the TOS is vague and there are conflicting beliefs about what .io’s policy on NSFW actually is. If you’re coming SPECIFICALLY because of the NSFW ban that’s going to be implemented I would encourage you to wait until we have 100% confirmation. Personally I like it already enough even if tumblr were to reverse the situation I think I’d use this place. I think Pillowfort really needs to come clear about this very soon, because if they don’t and people learn that “oh we can’t host NSFW after all,” despite claiming it a lot of people are gonna want their money back or at least wait until its free to use. The general belief is that as long as you don’t post NSFW in tags that doesn’t belong (like porn in #gardening) then it should be fine... so they say. We really need pillowfort to address people’s concerns, even though I think it’ll be fine, as this is a major reason why people are considering the move. The staff of pillowfort have said on twitter that they are in the process of finding a new domain. As such, as of this moment, pillowfort does not allow for nsfw. However, it will in the future. The best thing to do is be patient until then, I think the goods outweight hte bads.

Even though it’ll go away in 2019 you kinda. Gotta pay to use it right now. That’s kind of a thing.

No sideblog feature nor do I believe its planned, but I do believe the pillowfort team wants a system like the twitter app to quickly switch between full blogs.

While some people might consider this a plus, being able to add onto a post with text or photos has been a staple of both tumblr and twitter since the beginning. I see this changing as a major factor of whether or not people make the big move.

MCU, Detroit Become Human, Supernatural, and apparently hockey (and maybe Overwatch?) are the only big fandoms right now. While that already appeals to a lot of people, those of us into anime and the like have relatively few blogs from what we’ve seen. While this might change as time goes on, at least for the time being, anime and video game bloggers aren’t gonna have a lot for us. On the other hand, though? This also gives you the opportunity to make your claim as a fandom content creator.

Inability to make Communities private (right now) leaves that at potential risks of being raided.

(Minor) No custom themes it looks like, but that might be fore the better in the same vain? In your blog desc you can still link to other sites so now might be a good time to get used to listography instead of relying on custom links. To an extent you can control the colors of your blog though. Some people who hate eye-strainy themes on here or autodirect themes might actually find this a plus.

(Minor/Niche) Blogs themselves are bad for RPing if you’re into that. The forums however seem to provide an adequate place for forum-based RPing. But this would also make forum administrators responsible for upholding standards like “not jumping into other people’s RPs” and basic RP etiquette we have here. And forum-based rping would make finding RP partners outside of tags like #anime rp, #indie rp, etc to find people’s promos easier, depending on which becomes more popular. Even if you can add onto posts if you can’t trim the posts like we can on here (ty x-kit) it’d result in extremely long threads that would clog the dashboard significantly. I personally HIGHLY doubt the ability to edit other people’s posts or cut out replies will ever be a thing, so chances are RPing on pillowfort are gonna be Community-oriented and not on dash. At most people will make IC posts meant to be replied to and the like and headcanon memes while keeping actually threading in Communities, which will very well rely on the Community itself to be Not Shit.

Lacks instant messaging in its current state.

Despite the fact the bad really outweighs the good... I liked what little I could do. It genuinely feels like the only “true” tumblr alternative out there, even though its in beta. I just can’t really say much until the servers stabilize. This website is still in beta, so of course it has a lot of issues to work out, and of course it doesn’t have all the features this 11+ year old website has. I’m just stating these so people who are making the move who used this as their main website are aware of that.

I’m very excited to see this website grow, though!

[fightevilandthengetblownup]

CHAT: Anna+Ruby ALL

#1 - Anna and Ruby post Grey and Anna fighting in the alleyway; starts with Ruby and Lilith arguing, followed by Ruby targetting Anna

<Anna> *Lilith smirks at her leaning back against the wall* “You know it was cute seeing you trapped like that and by that fallen angel no less.”

<Jo> “What can I say, I learnt cockiness from somewhere not altogether bright, Lilith.” *Ruby gives a silent sigh* “What are you doing here?”

<Anna> “Oh nothing just watching you huff about. What’s the matter can’t find her?”

<Jo> “Why do I truly not believe that? And as a matter of fact I can’t. Seemingly the angel or whatever is left in her has disappeared.”

<Anna> *In a sing song voice* “I know where she isssss.” *Lilith smirks even more at Ruby.* “Infact I know that right now, the angel is laying in the emergency room of hospital after someone found her laying in an alley.”

<Jo> *Tilting her head to the side, Ruby looks at Lilith skeptically* “You’re saying that that scheming little bitch of an angel is lying useless and vulnerable in some hospital without that crazy watchdog keeping guard and you just happen to know where? That sounds almost too good to be true, Lilith.”

<Anna> “Gray’s twin found her and she mouthed off to him. It was an amusing show, very much a bonus since I was only after him.”

<Jo> “The other shadow? Mr. Weak-Monster-Eater himself took out the angel.” *Ruby smirks slightly, pondering to herself that she didn’t end up with a complete weakling on her blackmal cards* “What were you after him for? I would have thought you’d be after some Heavenly revenge after Gabriel had you pinned for so long.”

<Anna> “Oh I’ve taken care of Gabriel. I was celebrating and going to have some fun with the monster. Instead I got to watch him drain that little angel and kick her around a bit.”

<Jo> “Uh huh. …Any chance you’ll tell me where I could go kick her around myself?”

<Anna> “Normally I wouldn’t but since Grey said he wouldn’t feel bad if you killed her, I want to see if that’s true.” *Smiling Lilith tells Ruby the town name and the hospital, that the nurses had contacted Jo and they were waiting for the hunter to get there*

<Jo> “Of course you do. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to go see what amounts of revenge I can get out before the little blonde slut shows up. And if I’m walking into a trap Lilith…” *Ruby shoots the other a look even though she can sense the other is back up and fighting, before zapping away to Anna’s bedside*

<Anna> *Lilith chuckles leaving, there was a daycare near by and she felt like having a snack*

<Anna> (So cute Ruby is paranoid of traps now)

<Jo> *Ruby comes in easily to find Anna in an empty semi-private room, something hunters seemed to try and get a hold of so it was understandable whatever Anna was covered with would do the same* “Wake up angelbitch. Or maybe I’ll try out my defibulator skills.” *Ruby flicks through the chart saying Anna wasn’t in a coma at least, as she waits for the other to react*

<Jo> (Lol she is just a tad. Damn Anna)

<Anna> *Anna remembers when someone found her, she had tried to get them to not call 911 but she was slurring and the fact she couln’t stand up and walk made it useless, a few hours later and a few shots of sedation she had been cleaned, changed into a gown and examined..she was simply waiting for the last shot to wear off enough she could run when she heard Ruby, reaching weakly for the call button*

<Jo> “Uh uh uh, not this time.” Ruby moves around to catch her wrist, noticing the slight purplish bruising and giving it a nasty tug before jerking the bed rail down and the bed away from the other option* “You and I need to have a little conversation about just where you think you are on the food chain. And I mean that literally.”

<Anna> *Swallowing Anna pushes herself up, the drugs still in her system to numb her she blinks at Ruby..* “You’re trapped..” *She says slowly like she hasn’t fully figured it out that Ruby is actually here and this isn’t some after effect of Grey feeding*

<Jo> “And down came the rain and washed the fires out, so then incy wincy demon came out the devils trap.” *If she were Lilith she would have been singing, but Ruby just speaks boredly, leaning her forearms on the end of the bed now Anna cant call for help* “Now, it’s your chance to get a little taste of your games.”

<Anna> “Jo..they called her, she’ll be here any moment.” *Anna isn’t sure when Jo will be here, she moves to try and stand up wincing as they braced her ankle where she twisted it trying to get away from Grey.* “Nurses and doctors will be in soon too.”

<Jo> “Unlikely. See, I, unlike a lot of demons, happen to know the score between you two and I don’t think Barbie will be rushing any time soon to help you Kelley.”

<Anna> “Go back to hell” *Anna looks around for her bag, reaching to pull the IV out of her arm.*

<Jo> *Ruby shakes her head, barely containing a cruel laugh at Anna’s attempts to move before going to the side not tugged down and reaching for the velcro straps holding the mattress to the bed frame and quickly rips them off and straps down Anna’s wrists together to the railing* “Not so fast. Like I say, its your chance to realise what you do to others. Or maybe the little monster did that for you

<Jo> already, hmm?”

<Anna> *Anna struggles are weak as Ruby forces her back down and she can’t help but feel her heart race as she straps her arms down, the heart monitor giving away her fear as it beeps faster.* “I don’t do anything, you all get what you deserve..demons..monsters..”

<Jo> “Angels.” *Ruby snaps back at her, whipping out a hand automatically to hit the other woman across the face before turning to the heart monitor and pulling the back out of it to avoid a passing nurse hearing for the time being, expecting one to come in soon enough to find out the issue* “Maybe we wouldn’t treat you so bad if you’d learn /you’re/ place and what /you/ deserve.”

<Anna> *Anna’s head jerks to the side feeling the blow, she can taste blood in her mouth and takes a deep breath* “My place? Even at it’s lowesst is above you.” *Twisting her wrists she tries to get the velcro to come loose but it isn’t and she looks around the room for anything she can use, kicking out with her leg, knocking over a table, hoping to make enough noise to get someone’s attention*

<Jo> *Giving a sigh, Ruby snaps out her hand again to grab Anna’s chin and cheeks with one hand, looking blankly at her* “That’s right, I’m just a demon. Which means any human that comes in here to check on you will be dead before they can let a scream out, because I just don’t care. But that doesn’t mean I’m below an abomination like you.”

<Anna> “Just kill me, get it over with.” *Anna glares at Ruby, her head more clear now as she jerks again at the straps* “Angels are pure, humans are pure..you’re the abomination, a perversion of everything God made. Filth, trash..” *Anna thinks that if she can talk long enough she will be able to provoke Ruby to killing her*

<Jo> “And yet you’re neither an angel or a human. You’re /nothing/.” *Looking blankly back at the other, Ruby moves around to open and shut the draws of the little medical cart in the room, obviously looking for something in particular* “And that’s worse than what I am.” *Turning back to the redhead, Ruby approaches, pulling the safety cap off of a scalpel and pressing her thumb against it to test it*

<Anna> <Jo> “And yet you’re neither an angel or a human. You’re /nothing/.” *Looking blankly back at the other, Ruby moves around to open and shut the draws of the little medical cart in the room, obviously looking for something in particular* “And that’s worse than what I am.” *Turning back to the redhead, Ruby approaches, pulling the safety cap off of a scalpel and pressing her thumb against it to test

<Anna> (woops, making a fan mail lol)

<Jo> (LOL its cool)

<Anna> *Anna watches Ruby, breathing deeply, trying show herself as calm like an angel would be.* “I’m still better than you, I’ve been greater than you. Remember what Alastair called you, just a slut, a whore.. Even demons think you are nothing.”

<Jo> “And yet I’m alive, and he is dead. Funny the way the world works.” *Pulling her thumb off when it starts bleeding, she presses the pad of it against Anna’s forehead before dragging it along her nose in a disjointed line much like a surgical marker* “You play the angel card, but really you’re closer to something worse than I am these days. Fuck enough beasts you’ll start acting like one.”

<Anna> *The touch of a demon is digusting but the feel of the blood is worse, the corruption of the human the demon is in and it makes Anna shudder* “Already an abomintion according to you.” *Kicking out she bites her lip, her ribs sore from Grey kicking her as she tries to kick Ruby* “How many years did you last in hell before you started throwing yourself at your torturers to get free?”

<Jo> *The second Anna kicks out, though it lands against her hip bone in a way that /would/ have hurt if it werent for the awkward angle and lacking force, Ruby spins the blade to poin downwards in her fist before stabbing it into the top of Anna’s thigh and twisting, as she continues to dot blood line down her chin and onto her neck* “You are indeed. And much longer than you lasted against the

<Jo> weakling monsters. And seemingly Crowley if your neck means anything.”

<Anna> *Anna screams  as the scalpel enters her leg and it gets louder as Ruby twists it. She hates Ruby bringing up hte marks Crowley made on her as she pants through the pain, feeling Ruby making her trail of blood dots, her skin crawling with each one.* “Crowley has never touched me like that.”

<Jo> “Maybe not like that, but I’m sure he’s touched you. Not as thoroughly as that monster has, but then again, I doubt anyone has.” *Jerking the scalpel out of Anna’s leg, Ruby vanishes only to appear on the opposite side of Anna’s bed where the railing was down and she could see the neck mark clearer* “How about I do you a little favor and fix that up for you, hmm?” *Without waiting, she grips onto

<Jo> Anna’s jaw and presses the blade against her neck cutting lightly in three lines across the word, just enough to break up and scar over the scars rather than cut a vein*

<Anna> *Anna tries to jerk her head, to drive the blade deeper, still believing if she was dead it would be better.* “Fucking bitch, I hope Crowley knows you are breaking them and comes to kill you. Maybe I’ll call for him, sure he would want to know that some trash demon is messing with his favorite pet!” *Blinking Anna glares up at Ruby through tears that are starting to run down the side of her face*

<Jo> *That finally gets a chuckle out of the demon, shaking her head as she works and gives the ‘angel’ a cold grin* “I think you vastly over estimate his interest in worn out toys. If his last little pet was able to break you so bad, I doubt he’s going to really care about a few scratches here and there. 'Course, trying to kill yourself isnt going to help either.”

<Anna> *Anna jerks again hard, Ruby’s expression starting to make her angry and she pulls at the straps holding her wrists before starting an exorcism, maybe this she thinks will provoke the demon to killing her*

<Jo> *The second she starts up with the exorcism again, Ruby slaps her hand out again and again across the others face before pausing a second and reaching to grab the others tongue* “Stop those infernal attempts to exorcise me or I will make it so whatever your little monster likes using you for will be a waste of his time.”

<Anna> *Anna stops long enough to bite as hard as she can onto the fingures Ruby has in her mouth to grab her tongue, the moment she can she begins again, it’s not the fast exorcism but it’s the most painful she knows and she glares up at Ruby*

<Jo> *Ripping her fingers away, she lets out a snarl as the exorcism starts again, having been ignoring it last time before she jerks her hand down and stabs the scalpel into Anna’s stomach with a painful jerk from the attempts* “I’d shut up before.. I carve you like.. Lilith does babies on Thanksgiving. You’re in a hospital, you’ll get help before you could die.”

<Anna> *The pain in her stomach stops her as Ruby screams at her about Lilith and she chokes some gasping as she wants to put her hands down to stop the bleeding feeling the blood soak into the grown, adding to the blood that’s already on the gurney from her leg* “Did..you fuck Lilith too? Or just Alastair?”

<Jo> “Demons lie, you fucking bitch.” *Ruby shakes her other arm to get rid of the pain from the exorcism before pulling the scalpel out of the other with a slick noise.* “Make up your mind, you want me gone or you want me to talk about Lilith and Alastair?” *She reaches out for Anna’s hospital gown, wiping as much blood off the blade as she can*

<Anna> *Anna whimpers feeling the blade slide out of her stomach, she’s shaking now and she swallows looking at Ruby.* “Want you to kill me. Course listening to you talk is a slow death and torture combined. When you were manipulating Sam, was it to free Lucifer or did you enjoy making him into a fool?”

<Jo> “I’ll think about it, though slow and tortuous is soundly lovely.” *Ruby sneers down at her for a moment before setting the scalpel just out of Anna’s reach, as though testing her to see if she’d try to attack her or try to kill herself first second she gets to escape* “I did what I did because it kept me alive. I’m not Lilith or Alastair, or Azazel or even his Golden Girl Meg, or any of the other

<Jo> big namers. I’m just a demon whose the best at staying /alive/ through any means necessary and who could outwit, outlast, out-you know the rest any of the other demons on the island that is Earth alongside the hunters. I was the only one who would live through it, and it was the only way I was going to continue living.”

<Anna> *Anna gives a painful laugh* “So your'e nothing..just..doing whatever you can to survive. A useful piece of trash that knew how to get into a desperate human’s pants. Pathetic..” *Anna smirks weakly at Ruby eyeing the scalpel and she pulls on the straps seeing if she can reach her fingers out to it.*

<Jo> “I’m better than all of them though, don’t you get it? I was the best, I /am/ the best. Because I’ll keep existing while they all drop like flies. I win the game, which you’re going to join the pile of losers soon enough.” *Ruby gives a shake of her head, zapping across the room to the medical cart again, digging through it for a few items, stashing them in her coat, before zapping to the bed end*

<Anna> “Best who gloated and got herself killed with her own blade.” *Anna breathes slowly through the pain in her middle, she coughs and it hurts, she can’t tell if the blood she tastes is her own or Ruby’s where she bit her, the taste of demon hasn’t left her mouth yet.* “You should have did your duty and enjoyed the victory from a distance.”

<Jo> “Learn from your mistakes, also, like I gave a fuck. I’d already outlasted all but Meg - and that little viper is likely to see the next Apocalypse come and go with the way she spreads herself about. Course, I’ll see it with her this time around.” *Sighing, Ruby crosses her arms and slides a hand out to catch one of Anna’s ankles and jerks her towards her as a way to twist the others wrists*

<Anna> *Whimpering as Ruby jerks her down, leaving her in a awkward position, painful as the stab wound in her stomach is pulled on.* “You’re still boasting…didn’t learn the lesson well enough, you need to be taught it again”

<Jo> “Maybe, but you’re not going to be the one to teach it.” *Giving the other a small glare, Ruby digs into her pocket, pulling out another scalpel and driving it into the side of Anna’s uninjured ankle, right towards the back behind the ankle socket and bone, with a small look of glee*

<Anna> (did she just cut the tendon??)

<Jo> (I believe so yeah.)

<Anna> (ILU RUBY)

<Jo> (LOL WHY?!)

<Anna> (she’s making lilith all warm and dewy)

<Anna> *The pain explodes up the back of her leg, Anna tries to jerk her foot away but it doesn’t move, hanging limp as Ruby stands there holding it off the bad, the scalpel scraping against the bone.* “I hope you live..I hope that when everyone is done with you they keep you in an eternity of agony!” *

<Jo> “I hope you live too, angelface. I hope you live through your monster being torn apart by Crowley and his dogs, I hope you live through every friend you know getting burnt alive to a crisp by Lilith in a jealous rage that she didn’t get to finish your prized possession off, I hope you live through your siblings being summoned and slaughtered like the dumb sheep they are, and I hope, more than

<Jo> anything that when this is all over and you have nothing left, that somebody keeps you alive and breathing so you’ll never know the sweet nothingness and escape of death again. Just like you want to get right now.” *Ruby speaks calmly to begin with, her face twisting and voice getting harsher as she goes on, digging and twisting the scalpel in Annas ankle against the bone and what muscle was left*

<Anna> *Anna is twisting, on the bed, her body jerking everytime Ruby digs the blade into her leg.* “Kill myself first..” *She can’t speak, her breath catching as she screams when Ruby digs the tip of the scapel in between the bones, finding the nerves, her leg jerking as she tries to get it away*

<Jo> *Giving the metal another sharp twist, she jerks it out before moving around the side of the bed, running a hand up Anna’s calf as she does until she’s at her knee, gripping it tightly and angling the scalpel just against the gap between the join and her knee cap* “You say that like you’ll be allowed to die.”

<Anna> *Shaking her head Anna closes her eyes, fighting down the feeling of being sick. She wonders if this is what it would ahve been like had the demon ever captured her the first time as she feels Ruby’s hand run over leg, picking it up* “No one cares about me enough to bring me back..”

<Jo> *Trailing the edge of the scalpel around her knee cap, pressing hard enough to break the skin, Ruby gives Anna a withering look* “Some of us hate you enough to.”

<Anna> *Trying to move her leg away from the blade she looks at Ruby* “Good thing you can’t..demons don’t work that way. Get in line behind Crowley if you want to keep me to torture.” *Her breathing is fast as the pain radiates up her leg the muscles spasm as she tries to move her foot*

<Jo> “Careful, careful. You might damage yourself, and that wouldn’t be good at all.” *Ruby gives something which would look like a smile on anyone elses face as she continues to circle Anna’s knee even as her leg jerks, cutting out of the line occasionally like a child’s very focussed attempts at drawing* “As for that - who do you think would keep you alive long enough for that all to happen?”

<Anna> *Ruby’s chiding tone makes Anna cringe, she bites her tongue to stop herself from telling the demon to go fuck herself. The blade is still tracing around her kneecap and everytime  Ruby presses down her leg jerks* “No one would..like you said..not that interesting”

<Jo> “Good thing I have friends in high corrupt places then. I could even convince it was for your own good, I mean, who wants their siblings to die when they could stop it from happening?” *The look on Ruby’s face turns into the widest smirk thus far, the scalpel not leaving Anna’s skin as she moves the blade back down Anna’s calf - pressing deeper the further she gets down*

<Anna> *biting her lip Anna can feel more tears running down ehr face as Ruby runs the blade her leg, feeling it going deeper and deeper but she can’t help but give a broken laugh as Ruby suggests she has an angel on her side.* “Now I know you’re lying..you can’t corrupt an angel, not that good.”

<Jo> “And yet a no-talent monster corrupted you. It’s amazing what you can do when you know how.” *Smiling coldly, Ruby pulls the scalpel away before dropping it on the side of Anna’s bed not near her bound hands before moving towards the heart monitor and turning it back on, the blaring beeping making her scowl*

<Anna> “He didn’t. Wanted him, was tired of trying to live like I was still an angel, wanted to just live.” *Anna is laying back on the bed, her eyes half closed now, her leg where Ruby dropped it not moving as she flinches from the blaring of the heart monitor*

<Jo> *Ruby walks around the head of Anna’s bed, pushing it forward a few inches from the wall as she bend forward over the pillow to look Anna directly in the eye, smile still in place though a little more ferral* “Sound like any brothers of yours we know? Give it time, you’ll see.”

<Anna> *Glaring at Ruby with as much anger as she can summon Anna spits in the face of the demon as Ruby leans over her head* “Gabriel ..you are delusional if you think that.”

<Jo> *Wiping her face, Ruby’s face contorts for a moment before she smirks back at her* “Maybe. But then again, there are plenty of angels in the sky. And you saw how far big brother Lucifer fell, how had do you think it would be to drag another one down, hmm? I think grandly, not delusionally, though like I say - give it time, Anna. Give it time.” *With a flick of her wrist the velcro holding Anna

<Jo> captive vanishes and the rail on the other side of the bed pops up, as there seems to be something the pushed the nurses button* “Good luck, bitch, you’re going to fucking need it.” *And as the nurses start heading in, Ruby vanishes away*

<Anna> *Anna’s nearly unconcious from blood loss on top of the feeding from Grey. She doesn’t fight when the nurses come in only weakly protesting with they start yelling at her, asking her what she had done, how had she managed to go it. She felt them grab her wrists, pads going around them, attaching them to the bed again. She won’t remember the doctors coming in or them taking her off to surgery*

#2 - Anna decided to target Ruby for entertainment and got more than she expected.

<Anna> *smacks Ruby*

<Jo> LOL She’s giving you a grumpy look

<Anna> lol

<Anna> *smacks her again*

<Jo> “….What do you want?”

<Anna> “I’m bored and I figured after you fucked up my leg you owe me some entertainment.”

<Jo> “I figure otherwise. You brought that on yourself, Anna, don’t try to get me into more hit list with your moronic counter part or big brother, okay?”

<Anna> “if I wanted you on a hit list I would have already done it and I don’t have a counter part.”

<Jo> “Oh really? That’s news to me.”

<Anna> “Next time I break up with someone I’ll make sure to tell you first..”

<Jo> “Glad to hear it. What’d you end up doing this time, huh? Did you screw around on this one too? Or was it a case of getting a little too broken the last time we spoke?”

<Anna> “Try none of the above. The honeymoon ended is all.”

<Jo> “So you finally screwed your brain back in the right way? Maybe that little drug spell I heard about actually recorrected that mind of yours”

<Anna> “He was the one that decided it needed to end, I just tossed him out.”

<Jo> “Role reversal then, Anna? What really happened that broke the magic spell, hmm.”

<Anna> “Oh geez you sound like Jo, just more bitchy and that is hard to do.”

<Jo> “Guess that means you’ll be falling in love with me next then. But aside from that, I’m going to go ahead and guess that Prince Charming really was you dressing the toad in a crown and cape yourself before fucking him.”

<Anna> “You know I could just send you back to hell now..”

<Jo> “But you won’t. Because you’re bored and you’ve alienated anyone who even remotely likes you so all that’s left is blind hatred.”

<Anna> “I’m starting to rethink that bored thing..”

<Jo> “No you’re not. You’re enjoying this, and you know it. We used to get along, if you don’t remember, before you joined me in sleeping with a Winchester that is.”

<Anna> “You mean when you were still fooling Sam and feeding him blood to set lucifer free which led to my death.”

<Jo> “When i was still fooling everyone, get it right.”

<Anna> *Anna rolls her eyes*

<Jo> “Oh whatever Anna, either way you don’t want me to go and leave you to be bored and alone once again. You’ll take whatever kind of interest someone can give you. /What ever/ kind.”

<Anna> “You know that I’m not that desperate, I’m going to assume that you’re sticking around because Gabe is through with your skank ass.”

<Jo> “Gabriel has had nothing to do with my ass, I’m sticking around because it’s way too amusing to watch you suffer.”

<Anna> *Anna says the first few words of an exorsicm* “Careful, while you can blow hot air, I can actually make my words sting”

<Jo> *Cringing, Ruby glares at Anna* “Yeah, maybe, but I can make your body hurt much much worse” *With that she directs a kick to the underside of Anna’ foot, right over the ankle*

<Anna> *Anna breathes in as the pain radiates out* “Get in line behind Crowley.”

<Jo> “Crowley? Whats the big bad wolf doing skulking about now, Anna? Did he like my handiwork in slowing down his pets running?”

<Anna> “Oh he wants to thank you specially.”

<Jo> “Well thats just super. Next time you see him, let him know that if he wants something to be his, he should piss on it first, just like the rest of nature. Not sure you’d enjoy that though”

<Anna> *Anna begins to say more of hte exorcism* “"or maybe you should think twice before going around and pissing off the demon with all the souls.”

<Jo> *Giving Anna a look, Ruby kicks at her foot again before stomping her boot down across the top of Anna’s foot as well* “Keep the exorcisms up and I’ll see what fun I can have with the other leg, you get me? As for pissing off demons, he hasn’t caught me yet.”

<Anna> *Anna moves back, stumbling till she’s sitting on her bed, rubbing her hand over the cast.* “Right, like you would be stupid enough to try and break me further knowing Crowley is already unhappy over this”

<Jo> “Who knows, maybe he’s just upset there isn’t any symetry..” *Ruby smirks slightly, following after Anna and quickly jerking her hand up, pulling at Anna’s unharmed leg with her powers before catching her ankle in her hand*

<Anna> *Anna glares at Ruby* “Or maybe I’m just going to  use you as present to him when he comes back.” *She tries to pull her leg away from Ruby, keeping her expression calm even though she can feel her heart racing*

<Jo> *At Anna’s jerking, Ruby digs her fingers into each side of her ankle, fingernails popping the skin with the force as she looks down at the other’s glare with a smirk* “Maybe. But I’m thinking this might be to your advantage as well.”

<Anna> *Anna hisses as Ruby digs her fingers in, she’s starting to shake and she can’t hide it* “How is this to my advantage?”

<Jo> *Her smirk widens at Anna’s shaking, running her other hand up her calve and back down, knowing just how much the angel hated touch from a demon* “Easy. If you’re broken, then Crowley isn’t going to want to play until you’re back to better. It gives you some time from his highness.”

<Anna> *Her skin crawls as Ruby runs her hand over her leg, swallowing as the demon talks about being broken and Crowley’s idea to simply remove her leg.* “Somehow I don’t think it realy matters to him if i’m broken or not.”

<Jo> “Oh but it does. Unlss he really doesn’t care who plays with his toys and how.”

<Anna> “Why don’t you ask him yourself if he cares then?”

<Jo> “Because, you’re more fun to play with, of course.” *Ruby grins back at Anna, digging her fingers in again after relaxing them as she gives the small apartment a once over with a frown*

<Anna> *Anna stiffens as Ruby digs her nails into the skin again.* “You don’t like the decore? You should get comortable, you’re going to be seeing it for a while till Crowley comes back.”

<Jo> “I don’t think so, Anna.” *Ruby gives the ankle in her grip a firm twist before moving back towards the small kitchenette area, flicking through some drawers* “Whatever trap you made, you made a deal with me to break it.”

<Anna> *Anna gasps as Ruby twists her leg and then drops it to go rummaging through the drawers. She doesn’t think anything is in them since she hasn’t stocked the kitchen* “I did agree to break it. I never said when though.”

<Jo> “I can make you agree.” *Ruby slams the drawer back in when nothing shows up, turning around to approach her again instead, clenching one hand* “I could make you agree to let me out easier than anyone has ever made you agree to anything. I will be allowed out of here before any of your little plans to trap me with Crowley work and theres nothing you can do but let me.”

<Anna> *Anna sitting on the bed she’s pushed herself back to lean against the wall.* “Why are you so special? You think that i’ll agree to you faster than I would Crowley who is a real threat? You really do think high of yourself.”

<Jo> “Oh I do. And do you know why? Because if you don’t, whatever little plans you have going to stop that bastard are to waste. I am the /only/ one who knows about the barbie hunters plan to find that little spell of Crowleys that can get into and out of Hell without capture, and if you keep me here for Crowley to waste then you’ve just fucked over your one chances of stopping this whole ordeal”

<Anna> *Anna tilts her head to the side and she smirks* “What makes you think I want him stopped? That I haven’t said screw all of you and have decided to go with the side that is the sure side to win. I made that mistake before, fighting against the Winchesters, maybe I have learned.”

<Jo> “Because, you wouldn’t have that little broken leg still”

<Anna> “Your logic amazes me.” *Anna shrugs at Ruby.* “Crowley enjoys the suffering but just maybe the more I turn to him the less I suffer and the more you do in my place.”

<Jo> “My logic is correct though. Because you wouldn’t be this nonchalant, and you certainly wouldn’t be speaking as though the whole world is screwed including yourself if you were Team Crowley all of a sudden.” *Ruby sneers down at her, catching her ankle again and twisting sharply* “Though you do seem to jump sides when you jump from cunt to cock … to cock?”

<Anna> *Biting her lip hard as Ruby grabs her again she breathes slowly.* “You’re the only one that sleeps with your enemies whore.” *She’s learned more from Ruby right now though than she’s learned from anyone else about what the plan is and she keeps prying. “So if you’re so important why are you doing the lap dogs work fetching spells?”

<Jo> “That’s true, I still /remember/ they’re my enemy.” *Ruby smirks slightly, usign her other hand to force Anna’s foot back at a bad angle as she looks about for something with enough force for some blunt trauma* “Who do you trust to get the important information? Not the stupid sheep or drones. If you want something done right, do it yourself or get someone better than you to.”

<Anna> *Anna can’t help but yelp as Ruby pushes her foot back and she kicks trying ot get her leg free, the only thing in the apartment is the bed, her bag and the table Jo kicked and broke* “So your the head sheep, the one that goes running off a cliff first in blind panic or who stands there bleeting while you’re stabbed to death.” *Anna refers to her gloating as Dean killed her*

<Jo> *Letting her foot go, Ruby notices the broke table leg, snapped off underneath the rest of it and grins widely* “No, I’m the wolf hanging around with the rest of the bleeters, but unlike the fairy tale, I’m not trying to hide it and I’m not going to get shot again.”

<Anna> “Sure you’re not, you’re going to help do away with Crowley and everyone is going to throw you a parade..” *Anna shakes her head, wondering if ego is a part of every demon or just the type of person that becoems one.* “I’m sure you’ll be dead as soon as Crowley is.”

<Jo> “Who says I will be around then? I’ll drop barbiedoll or your big brother the memo of what they need, and then disappear as always. And by then, they’ll have to watch out for /someone else/ instead from what I’ve heard.”

<Anna> “What do you mean..someone else?”

<Jo> “I mean, why do you think I’m not siding with Crowley?”

<Anna> *Anna starts another part of the exorcism* “What do you know Ruby that you aren’t telling the others?”

<Jo> *Ruby hisses at the exorcism starting again, lunging for the broken chair leg before spinning around and slamming the piece down on Anna’s uninjured knee with a snarl* “What makes you think I’m going to tell you?”

<Anna> *The pain stops her leaving her laying back gasping as Anna blinks trying to breath through the pain.* “Because if you don’t I will give you over to Crowley and this time I’m not bluffing!”

<Jo> *Ruby grins, swinging the makeshift bat with one hand into the other, watching Anna writhe and choke on her breath before shaking her head* “Lets just say, big brothers spells don’t work so well when they’ve been destroyed. And somebody is going to pay for it, sure I might be up there, but I’m too useful to be killed - at least those smart enough to realise it know it.”

<Anna> “Who is going to pay for it? What is this spell Gabe has you looking for?” *Anna is breathing hard, she hadn’t heard anything about this from anyone and she’s feeling even more bitter about being kept in the dark by everyone.*

<Jo> “Completely unrelated, Anna.  Gabriel tried to trap my old boss, and thanks to your master that’s broken again, and while everyone thinks its safe once Crowley is gone - she’ll strike.  And hard.   I personally plan to stay out of her way.” *Ruby swings the wooden leg down on Anna’s leg between sentences, before sighing and giving the other a look* “Barbie has me looking to stop Crowley. So does

<Jo> Gabe, but /he/ wouldn’t pass on any other information like huntress did.”

<Anna> *Anna screams as Ruby hits her leg again and she’s confused, it’s not just the pain making her blury* “Lilith has been free, why would things change once Crowley is gone?” *Her knee is on fire,  she can feel it throbbing with her heart beat as she tries to move away from Ruby*

<Jo> “Because, Lilith was trapped in her meatsuit for /months/.  She’s not going to be happy but isn’t stupid enough to act while Crowley’s around, of course.” *Ruby grins at Anna’s twitching, when she shifts away startng to hit along her calfbone instead* “Or! Maybe I’m just talking out of my ass for the fun of it?”

<Anna> *Anna screams with each hit, she moves her leg in the cast over her other leg in a desperate attempt to protect it.* “Lilith is just a demon, she can be dealt with, Gabe can deal with her.” *Laying on her side she can feel the tears run down her face, she’s not sure if Ruby has broken a bone yet or not, there’s nothing but a radiating pain going up and down her leg*

<Jo> “Just a demon, maybe. But your brother is just an angel, at the end of everything.” *Ruby snorts at Anna’s attempt to protect her leg, smashing the wood on edge down on her casted toes before jerking that leg to the side and instead giving a hard hit to Anna’s ribs instead* “I havent heard any cracks yet, be thankful.”

<Anna> *The blow to her ribs steals her breath as she lays there, her arms wrapping around her gasping for breath. Curling up, her leg starting to show an impressive bruising she breathes hard.* “Angel none of you can kill, angel who you are beating up on his little sister..”

<Jo> “Do I /seem/ frightened?” *Ruby leans in over Anna, grinning widely at her as she presses the end of the leg leg harshly against her ribs*

<Anna> *Gasping Anna quickly starts to say the last of the exorcism, trying to get Ruby to back off* “No but you do seem stupid.”

<Jo> *Ruby gives her a sharp look, bringing the leg down on Anna’s mouth as the painful prickling from the exorcism grows and wracks through her, before throwing caution to the wind and trying to vanish, almost surprised to find she could*

<Anna> *Anna jerks her head back seeing Ruby aim for her head as she feels the wood slam into her mouth just as her head hits the wall. She watches a blury Ruby vanish and she sags down, the taste of blood filling her mouth*

#3 -  Anna tries to sic Ruby on Grey. Ruby plays along...and then does nothing to Grey because #demonyo

<Anna> Anna is thinking about seeing if Ruby wants to go kick Grey’s ass

<Jo> LOL Ruby would prefer kicking Gray’s ass to Grey.  Grey’s on her payroll in contrast. Though she’d not be completely against ruffling his feather’s a little, but she doubts thats what Anna wants

<Anna> no she wants pain and suffering

<Jo> “That I can do. Death however, I won’t be handing out. I might need him”

<Anna> “Whatever, I just want him as useless as he think I am.”

<Jo> “So pretty much like he is now? That’s not asking much”

<Anna> “No I want him suffering.”

<Jo> “…Can I go through Barbie? No I don’t suppose you’d like that. Suffering though, what scale are we talking, your invalid foot for the forseeable future suffering or I no longer have the will to truly live suffering?”

<Anna> “No you can’t touch Jo or anyone else..and will to live, he thinkings hurting now sucks, he hasn’t suffered yet.”

<Jo> “Well thats going to be fun then.. …Any messages I should pass along or just say their from the redheaded witch who can’t stand to do it herself?”

<Anna> “Tell him that Crowley isn’t the one he should be afraid of.”

<Jo> “Speaking of, I’m not going to have him on my tail about breaking both his toys, am I?”

<Anna> “No I’ll make sure Crowley doesn’t go after you.”

<Jo> “Well then. What am I getting in return, Anna?”

<Anna> “I’ll owe you a favor.”

<Jo> “… …/Any/ favor?”

<Anna> “Within reason. What are you thinking?”

<Jo> “Oh, I don’t know. I just like having them up my sleeve. I’ve got a few favors still owed from your brother as it is.”

<Anna> “Well good for you.”

<Jo> “So… a favor if I ask it in future is my end?”

<Anna> “What?”

<Jo> “Did someone knock you around the head? Oh wait, yes I did. In return for making the little monster cry for the next however long until he’s as well suffered as you, I get to ask a favor some day, correct?”

<Anna> “Yes.”

<Jo> “Well then.. Sign me up.”

<Anna> *Anna smirks*

<Jo> “We done here? I have tasks to take care of and you’ve got a bed to be ridden in.”

<Anna> “Oh screw you the bruises hurt but not that bad.”

<Jo> “Oh yes? How about you stand up then? Give us a twirl”

<Anna> *Rolling her eyes Anna stands up looking at Ruby with a raised brow.* “Happy?”

<Jo> *Ruby considers her, stepping back a few paces* “Walk across the room and I’ll leave you be. Even organise someone to.. look out for things for you if you like.”

<Anna> *Anna glares at Ruby, taking several steps, the more she takes the more shakey she becomes but she does it.* “I don’t need anyone. I’m fine..”

<Jo> *Letting out a laugh, Ruby circles around her before pressing a finger right between her collar bones with a smirk* “Okay, back into bed with you. Damage yourself and whatever favor you might be able to do will go bye bye. How about I fetch that knucklehead researcher to keep you company? Or just round up some dumb monster to do so.. I think thats easier.”

<Anna> *Anna turns around and goes back to the bed, sitting on the foot of it, her legs aching now* “Jo’s been coming by, I’m fine.”

<Jo> “Call it insurance.” *Ruby grins a little too wickedly, before holding out her hand* “So, we’ll shake on it this time, okay?”

<Anna> *Anna rolls her eyes again reaching out and shaking Ruby’s hand.* “Fine, we’ve shook on it. Now go make the runt suffer.”

<Jo> “Gladly.” *Ruby lets out a laugh, vanishing away*

#4 - Anna and Ruby making a deal...

<Anna> *Anna spent the morning getting over her hangover at the hospital, she thought the sound of the saw they used to cut the cast off was something they created in hell but then everything seemed better once they looked at the wounds, they had healed but not how they had hoped. She suspected that was Crowley’s doing and she just nodded as they worked with her and fitted a plastic piece around the fron

<Anna> of her leg that would let her walk almost normally. They had set up appointments she wouldn’t go back too and when she left she breathed out, walking slowly. When she got home she thought about Ruby and Jo and she set everything up to summon the demon*

<Jo> *Ruby had been sleuthing about finding just the right pawns for the rest of her plan, double checking everything in such a way she could get this plan to unfold with her seeming innocence in tact when she feels the pull of a summoning. Staring at Anna when she arrives, she gives the other’s worse appearance a look* “So.. want to add another person to your little revenge route now?”

<Anna> *Anna is leaning against the wall when Ruby appears, she’s spent enough time in bed now that the cast is off and she shakes her head.* “No I want you to not go after Grey. I’m going to assume you haven’t because Jo hasn’t screamed at me.”

<Jo> “But, angelcake, I’ve already got everything set up. Ready to go. And I doubt Barbie would be screaming at you about it.” *Ruby almost sulks, not enjoying the idea of being told she needs to abort another game before her eyes flash back to Anna* “Would I still get my favor from you?”

<Anna> *Anna rolls her eyes as Ruby seems to sulk.* “Yes you still get your favor. Just things have changed and it’s for the best right now if you don’t go after him.”

<Jo> *Ruby smiles widely at the confirmation she still gets something, now out of doing nothing, before giving Anna a quizical look, moving around the small space to look out the tiny window* “So… just what has changed that sparked this change of heart? Not fucking the little monster now instead?”

<Anna> *Anna glares pushing off the wall walking away from Ruby.* “No I am not. I was asked to not do anything to him for right now and at risk of loosing hte last person willing to talk to me right now I’m doing what she asks.”

<Jo> “Jo, then. Interesting.” *Ruby lets Anna get a few feet away before disappearing and reappearing in front of her with a smirk* “You know.. my plan was going to include her. Just enough that she’d be a little too shaken up to even think about where this all came from. You’d have been free as a bird, and she might even prefer your company again over that of men.” *Sliding past and around her, Ruby

<Jo> adds quietly, her chin hooked over Anna’s shoulder and whispering in her ear* “Sure you want this over?”

<Anna> *Anna stops wincing as Ruby appears and she listens she breathes deeply..the idea that Jo wouldn’t want Grey around is what she wants and she’s thinking hard about letting Ruby do it but then  she feels Ruby’s chin on her shoulder and the demon is whispering in her ear and she’s snapped out of it.* “Yes I’m sure.” *Shoving Ruby away from her she crosses her arms*

<Jo> *Ruby laughs at the reaction, stepping back with her hands on her waist, smiling widely* “Absolutely sure? Because it’s costing you either way”

<Anna> “Yes I’m sure. Jo has made it clear that the first one of us that does anything else is going to be shot and so far that’s the one thing I’ve never experienced and I would like to keep it that way.”

<Jo> *That answer surprises her, raising an eyebrow at the redhead before nodding her head once* “Okay, sure, I won’t start my little plan. But if you change your mind.. your going to have to pay again”

<Anna> “And what would be the price for next time?” *Anna sighs wishing she had put down traps as she walks back towards the kitchenette, running a glass of water*

<Jo> *Ruby moves freely about the apartment, moving to sit down on the small bed, crossing her knees as she watches Anna* “Protection. From you. Forever.”

<Anna> *Anna laughs as she comes back sitting in the chair that goes to the broken table.* “I think I need more protection from you.”

<Jo> “True, but who knows. Big brother might give you a reboot if you ask him and then maybe you’ll want to get revenge for those little legs of yours. Which I’d rather a gaurantee that that’s not going to happen.”

<Anna> “That won’t happen. Angel isn’t in my future and as for my legs..I’ll get my revenge on you in time.” *Anna takes a sip from the glass*

<Jo> *Ruby smirks slightly, her lip curling up wider as she runs an eye across Anna;s little plastic tubing sticking out from her jeans* “I was just worried about your legs actually. Gabriel would be unlikely to want to make his sister so upset about the whole Grace and falling thing /again/. As for the revenge.. I want to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

<Anna> “I’ve already cashed in all my favors with Gabe. And as far as everything else..well..”*Anna shrugs taking another sip of the water.* “You can try but unless I want to make another deal with you. You won’t get protection from me.”

<Jo> “Glad to hear it then.” *Ruby sighs at Anna’s confirmation that she’d need the other to make another arrangement with her, but figures it was only a matter of time before she’d be interested in starting her little plan on the monster again* “We’ll see then, Anna.”

<Anna> “I’ve already warned Jo to watch out for you so don’t think about doing it anyway Ruby.” *Anna raises an eyebrow at Ruby with a bit of a smirk*

<Jo> “She wouldn’t know it was me if I did anyway, Anna.” *Ruby sneers back at her with a laugh*

<Anna> “Well she would now since I warned her.” *Anna counters right back*

<Jo> “What makes you so sure I was even going to be around when it hapened?”

<Anna> “What makes you so sure Jo wouldn’t summon you and I wouldn’t be around to let you out of that trap. Have you seen what Jo does to monster’s when she’s pissed?”

<Jo> *Ruby stands up, approaching the other and leaning down to look the seated woman straight in the eye with a smirk* “Again, what makes you think she’d know it was me?”

<Anna> “Because I’ll tell her.” *Anna raises a brow not understanding how Ruby is this stupid.*

<Jo> “And I’ll tell her it’s because you asked me to. Otherwise, what reason would I really have to fuck with her and her little boytoy since both are on my payroll?” *Ruby continues smirking, raising an eyebrow in response*

<Anna> “Jo already knows idiot that I started something.” *Anna stands dumping the water she blessed over Ruby’s head.*

<Jo> *Ruby lets out a shout at the water, jerking away from Anna with a scowl before scratching and shaking at her head to get it off before grabbing the corner of the sheet on the bed and using it to dry at her hair* “Doesnt mean you know what you started. And trust me, you wouldn’t like her knowing it was on your original incentive that that was going to happen.”

<Anna> “I’m not sure you understand how beyond caring I’m starting to be right now Ruby. Grey already wants to kill me and that’s fine and if Jo ends up hating me, well that’s just my luck and I haven’t even got to how bad things are with Crowley.” *Anna can’t help but enjoy watching Ruby smoke for a moment as the water burns the demon.*

<Jo> “Well then princess, how bout you tell me and I’ll see if I can’t actualy help out. What with our mutual hatred of that demonic pain in the ass.”

<Anna> “And what is the price for your help with that?”

* STATUS: Online

-

<Jo> “The same price I said, protection from you.”

<Anna> “No, I’m no threat and you know it.”

<Jo> “Doesn’t mean I dont think you may be in the future.” *Ruby shoots her an almost nice smile, though her snide tone betrays it*

<Anna> “I think it’s flattering that you think I have a future.” *Anna sits back down rolling the empty glass in her hands*

<Jo> *Shrugging a shoulder, she sits back down on the end of the bed, continuing to dry her hair and head with a sneer* “What can I say? I think you’d give the guy a good enough kick out of ruining you that he won’;t kill you yet.”

<Anna> “Oh you mean like you tried to do?” *Watching Ruby using her sheets she rolls her eyes* “There’s a towel in the bathroom.”

<Jo> “I tried to what? Kill him? Not likely, I’m not that dumb. Or ruining you? I think you’ve got your papers mixed up, Anna.” *She shoots the other a look at the suggestion, continuing to use the sheet with a smirk*

<Anna> *Anna gets up walking to the bathroom, she can’t believe she’s making small talk with the demon..this is a new level of low for her. Grabbing the towel she throws it at Ruby as she comes back into the room* “I’m refering to the hospital. I assume that one reason you just didn’t kill me. More fun for you to watch me.”

<Jo> *Ruby laughs at Anna fetching the towel, catching it with one hand and looking temptedly at the sheet still before using the towel instead to just triple check she wasn’t going to continue smoking* “Ah. Well, that is true. But more it was a case of your being more useful while still alive.”

<Anna> *Anna shakes her head, the demon thinks she’s still useful. She’s sighs as she sits back down* “So soon as my use is gone then you kill me?”

<Jo> “Why would I bother wasting my time doing that? I just wont talk to you, easy enough.”

<Anna> “True though you’re the one that can be summoned.”

<Jo> *Ruby sighs, tossing the towel behind she’s sure she’s not still got any water on her, giving Anna a sharp look before laughing* “But then you would be annoying. And worth killing.”

<Anna> “Not if you are trapped. I said I would let you out of them, I never said when.” *Anna smirks at Ruby*

<Jo> “I..” *Ruby frowns, staring at her for a second before laughing* “Well well well, you worked out the loophole. Here I thought those drugs might have scrambled your brain enough that it wouldnt have”

<Anna> “Why do you think I agreed to that to begin with?” *Anna glares at her just a  bit for thinking her that stupid.*

<Jo> “Sheer need? Either that or maybe you just wanted a kiss.” *Ruby smirks, leaning back on her hands as she looks about the room again* “So, any reason your face is all rearranged, angelcake?”

<Anna> *Anna reaches up touching one of the bruises from where Gray kicked her and she shrugs.* “Gray and I aren’t talking right now.”

<Jo> *Ruby’s brow shoots up, looking at her interestedly* “Really really? Well. That’s an interesting way to decide upon that type of thing.”

<Anna> “It’s better than the first date you might say. Sorry your weren’t the first to try and take my leg off.” *Anna chuckles some*

<Jo> “Well, looks like we’re well on the way to your being my willing bitch, right?” *Ruby smirks back at her, trying not to laugh again*

<Anna> *Anna glares and crosses her arms* “Keep talking and I’ll start exorsing you just to cause you pain.”

<Jo> “Oh, exorcisms. I like it when you talk dirty to me.” *Her tone is completely flat, looking back at the other*

<Anna> *Tilting her head Anna smiles sweetly and starts to talk to her in Enochian*

<Jo> *Ruby snarls, twitching and holding up a hand* “No. Okay, no thank you. I can’t understand you and that really hurt to listen to.”

<Anna> “It’s Enochian, listen closer” *Anna chuckles*

<Jo> “Doesnt mean it doesn’t hurt, good lord is that what you guys pass off as a language?” *Ruby laughs, shaking her head, not dropping her hand*

<Anna> “What, you never heard your daddy speak it? Alastair and Lilith know it, I guess you weren’t important enough to learn it.” *Anna keeps speaking in the angelic tongue*

<Jo> *Ruby rolls her eyes at her, shifting her hands and lying back, pressing the palms of her heels against her ears at the others talking, getting a few words here and there but little else* “That whole thing is archaic. I’d think if Lilith knew how annoying that damn well sounded she’d be turning all of Hell into a giant sound system playing that gibberish.”

<Anna> “Archaic but effective for sending demons back to hell.” *Anna grins as she speeds up, talking faster now, hoping to reach the end of it before Ruby realizes*

<Jo> *Ruby jerks upwards, looking at her with a snarl* “You want me back in Hell? Fine. I’m going.” *She sneers at the redhead for a second, calling her bluff and wondering to herself what she’s going to do with the broken shell of a girl she was sticking inside of if she continues*

<Anna> *Anna shrugs as she keeps speaking* “Call this payback for the leg.” *She can deal with the body, she’s got used to cleaning up after Gray and resumes her speaking*

<Jo> “Don’t bury the bitch will you? I like this one.” *She shudders slightly as Anna keeps talking, struggling to stay in her body now more than before as the other gets closer to fully springing her out, before Ruby feels the final tug and lets out a scream as she’s pulled out in her true form and sent back down with a burst of lightglobes*

<Anna> *Anna watches the body fall and she wonders how long it will take Ruby to find her way from the bottom pit she sent ehr too. Grabbing a hand she checks the body to see if she’s dead and she sighs barely finding a pulse..dragging the body out to the parking lot Anna calls 911 saying she found the girl coming back from dinner*

#5 - Anna and Ruby discussing collars

<Jo> *Getting out of Hell was getitng both more and less difficult as time went by, Ruby finding more paths blocked but new gaps popping up all the time, and while it took her what could be considered a few weeks to fight and sneak her way out, the time it took to locate her current prefered body ‘up top’ was more frustrating. Smoking out of the intensive care ward, she finds her way back to the

<Jo> angel’s apartment, hell-bent on getting a bit of revenge. The redhead is laying passed out on the bed when she arrives, an occurance Ruby hadn’t had the fortune of seeing yet and kicking her foot sharply against the heel of Anna’s feet she snaps nastily* “Rise and shine, bitch, I wanted to let you know how bad your little plan worked out.”

<Anna> *Anna getting home had went back out after hours of trying to work out a way to get the collar off, coming home again with a bottle she drank until she passed out, shutting her mind off from everything. The kick to her foot barely phased her and the sound of someone’s voice in the room with her has her blinking slolwy as she pushes herself up on her elbows.* “What?”

<Jo> *Ruby frowns at the slow reaction, before noticing the mostly-drunk bottle beside the bed and the blurry reaction, smirking slightly* “Oh I’m sorry, did you not hear me?” *Her voice gets louder as she speaks, a sneer on her face as she moves around near to Anna’s head, almost shouting* “I said, rise and shine you fucking whore.” *She spots the shiny metal around the other’s neck almost instantly

<Jo> once she was closer, though holds off questioning it as she starts tapping the others temple with a finger harshly*

<Anna> *The screaming in her ears is enough to sober her quickly and she tries to push Ruby away, her movements uncordinated and sloppy.* “Go back to Hell, leave me alone Ruby.” *Anna doesn’t want to deal with the demon, she can still hear Grey’s words from last night and she squeezes her eyes shut trying to bat Ruby’s hand away*

<Jo> “Hmmm, only if you come with me too, angelcake.” *Ruby smirks, volume still slightly higher than normal as she avoids the others attempts to avoid her easily* “Now I wonder what sent you to the bottle, Anna. Maybe the shiny new neck piece?”

<Anna> *Anna groans hearing Ruby’s loud tone and she tries to shove the demon away* “Crowley, there happy? Please leave.” *Sitting up she rubs her eyes trying to clear them, she’s not sure if still isn’t a bit drunk as the room sort of spins slowly*

<Jo> “Not in the slightest. You sent me back to fucking /Hell/!” *She shouts again, even if the redhead’s actions worked in her favor, she had no intention of letting her know that, reaching out to slip a finger into the very thin gap between metal and skin, pressing harshly back into Anna’s neck rather than actually being able to fit it, and tugging her forward*

<Anna> “Your the idiot that set there and let me!” *Anna snaps as her head throbs with every word Ruby shouts. She grabs Rubys wrist trying to push her hand away as the demon reaches for the collar, wincing as Ruby’s fingers dig into her skin, nearly falling off the bed at the tug.* “Leave me the hell alone!”

<Jo> *Ruby laughs cruelly at Anna’s flailing, smirking as she catches her with her other hand, twisting the metal ring slightly in curiosity* “But I want to know what’s so interesting about you that crazy fucker gave you a ring. Is your tongue action really that good?”

<Anna> *Anna winces as the collar twists her head leaning to the side* “Crowley is an ass. I’m not that interesting. He did this to Grey too so it’s nothing special!” *Digging her nails into Ruby’s wrist she tries to pry teh demon’s hands off of the collar*

<Jo> “Oh? I’d have to disagree given he kept that monster for quite some time - must be something of use that you both have.” *She smirks slightly, brow raised, beforeshe digs her finger back towards Anna’s throat* “I wonder just what this collar does..” *Ruby’s eyes widen in amusement as she decides to test it, scratching at the inside of the collar with her finger and powers alike*

<Anna> *Whatever Anna is about to say stops as the collar does exactly what Grey said it would do and she tries to scream as her body arches, the shock running down her spine, leaving her seeing stars for a moment in her hungover state*

<Jo> *The second she feels the jolt, Ruby’s tugging her hand away, watching Anna tense and bend as she lets out a strangled scream. Waiting a second, she laughs loudly* “Well. /That/ looks like something /fun/.”

<Anna> *Sitting on the bed, she holds onto the edges as she breathes hard, it only lasted a second but it felt like someone hit her hard and she looks up glaring at Ruby* “Fuck off”

<Jo> “I wouldn’t be getting angry with me right now, angelcake. I could set that off again in a second” *Ruby laughs again*

<Anna> “Fine, what do you want?” *Anna resists the urge to rub her temples, her head is throbbing now and her throat feels sore, like she’s starting t come down with something from the shock*

<Jo> “Well, I was coming for a little revenge, so…” *Ruby doesn’t so much trail off as reach out to press a finger against the metal again, pulling and scratching at it with her powers again, a dark grin on her face*

<Anna> *Anna tries to move away and the next thing she knows is she’s laying on her back blinking up at the ceiling breathing hard* “Fuck you Ruby* "Wincing her throat hurts even more and she glares up at the demon*

<Jo> "No, Anna, thats what that collars supposed to symbolise. Youre the concubine and you’re going to give one hell of a blow job seiving like that in the middle.” *The glare and words basically roll off, Ruby smirking down at Anna almost gleefully* “Your going to be even worse than that little monster ever was, arent you? Cause he delluded himself while youre going to get off in reality, am I right?”

<Anna> *Anna rolls over getting to her feet trying to shove past Ruby unsteadily.* “I’m not listening to you.” *She tries to block Ruby out, to not listen but she can’t and she tenses.* “That’s right I’m going to be a good fallen angel and I’m going to lay on my back and spread my legs because that’s the only way that I know how to keep people safe. There? Happy?”

<Jo> “Is that what you were doing with the other monster all this time?” *Ruby looks at Anna almost knowingly, smile twitching to show as she shoves her back down on the bed with one hand*

<Anna> *Anna looks up at Ruby before looking away* “What other monster?”

<Jo> “Don’t play coy, it’s not befitting” *Leaning down, pinning Anna with a stare, Ruby grins cruelly before speaking as though to a child* “Was that what you were doing with Gray all this time? Laying back and spreading to keep your little friends safe. I’ll bet that was part of it, wasn’t it? If he didnt hurt your pals, you’d let him fuck you til morning light.”

<Anna> *Anna’s fist comes up as Ruby leans down over her and she hits the demon in the mouth* “Shut up! You don’t know anything about what went on with Gray and I. It was never ever like that! *Anna’s pissed, she closes her eyes wiping them as she thinks about Gray.*

<Jo> *Jerking back, she rubs at her mouth before laughing* "I think I hit a nail hard on the head. Even if you can’t admit it. But oh well, I think I’ll leave you to your moping, angelcake, you’ve still got a fair bit of a bottle there” *Smirking, Ruby touches at Anna’s collar again, powers attacking harder this time before she vanishes away*

<Anna> *The pain hits Anna and she lays gasping, glad Ruby is gone and hating everything at the moment. Her hand reaches up feeling the collar and she crawls up into bed, crying herself back to sleep*

#6 - Anna and Ruby make another agreement, this is when Ruby discovers Jo’s knife

<Anna> *Anna sat in her apartment, she had the meds that Jo told her to get for Gray but she hadn’t gone back yet and she hadn’t seen Crowley again. She rubs her hand around the collar and she wonders if Crowley is as powerful as God or if there was a true limit to his power. Standing up she salts off an area and she summons Ruby.*

<Ruby> *Ruby was hoping the further away from Anna the less her collar would shock her - sadly that theory didn’t work, but the people in South Africa were dull enough given she couldn’t understand a word that she didn’t particularly mind staying there. Right up until the summons which has her snarling at Anna the second she appears hissing at the salt line across the part of the room she was in* “What.”

<Anna> *Anna looks at Ruby, she’s openly hostile and she  starts to question it but then she doesn’t, it doesn’t matter.* “I want to talk about finding a limit to Crowley’s power and I need a demon.”

<Ruby> “And I want to fry your ass for whatever bullshit you’ve been doing recently. If I let you do yours, can I do mine?” *Ruby glares back at the other woman, crossing her arms as she tries to work out what on earth she was doing there. if she needed a demon, she could have called endless faceless masses in all honesty*

<Anna> “What is your problem? I haven’t called you in ages.” *Anna stands at the salt line, arms crossed as she stares at Ruby. “Do you want to keep Crowley around? If so I’ll leave you here.”

<Ruby> “My problem is the cat and mouse you’ve been playing with someone - be it Crowley or Sparky or the other one. Quit getting your ass shocked to kingdom come.” *Ruby shrugs a shoulder, not answering as to whether she wanted the supposed king around*

<Anna> “What? What does my being shocked have to do anything? I haven’t talked to you because last time you decided to try it. Why do you think I’m behind a salt line?” *Anna rolls her eyes at Ruby, the demon had worst moodswings than her she thinks. Whatever Ruby’s been doing it’s not her issue.* “Now do you want to work on Crowley or do you want to stay here for a while?”

<Ruby> “Because it’s annoying and painful as all hell that’s what. You can get rid of the salt though, I’m not going to shock you any time soon. Or at all.” *Glaring still, Ruby pokes her foot as close to the salt line as possible, giving Anna a glare* “What did you want, Anna?”

<Anna> “Crowley didn’t like you playing with his toy did he?” *Anna smirks for a moment as Ruby talks about it hurting.* “Crowley once told Dean that deals can do practically anything, it’s basically the most power tool a demon has. I want to know if you can deal away his work.”

<Ruby> *Ruby raises an eyebrow at Anna’s suggestion about her not enjoying the playing, automatically lifting a hand to her neck before dropping it like she’d burnt herself even thinking about the collar around it. The question about deals makes her pause, staring at the other* “Deals /can/ do practically anything, it’s all in the wording and knowing your way around it. What did you want?”

<Anna> *Watching Ruby raise her hand to her neck and she tries to not smile, it’s the first thing in weeks that’s made her actually feel amused about anything.* “Did Crowley give you a presant Ruby?” *She doesn’t elaborate anymore about her idea, if Ruby was wearing a collar then maybe things changed in her original idea.*

<Ruby> *The look of smug amusement sets her teeth on edge, glaring across at the other woman with a heavy sigh* “What did you want, Anna? Anything to fuck over that pompous waste of energy is good in my books.”

<Anna> “Answer the question first Ruby? Are you wearing a collar?” *Anna raises a brow, still smiling as Ruby avoids the question. Bending over she tries to look at Ruby’s neck closer.*

<Ruby> *Anna’s approach just makes the demon step backwards, away from the other woman as the idea her interest might get the better of her little salt lines* “You answer mine.”

<Anna> “I can find out for myself, all I have to do is try and remove mine..” *Anna threatens tapping her collar, she’s not above it and she lifts her chin up as she waits for Ruby to call her bluff.*

<Ruby> “Touch it and I will never help whatever deal plan you have going on. And trust me, other demons won’t touch you with a ten foot pole. I’m your best shot, angelcake, and if you do that I guarantee I will do everything in my power to screw you and your little bitch over.”

<Anna> “So you are wearing one. Interesting.” *Anna smirks as she wonders just how many time Ruby has been shocked. It made having woke up the floor a few times a bit more bearable, the only times she didn’t think it was ever worth it was when Crowley had started her training.* “Do you think deals can undo what he’s done. Angel magic and brute force hasn’t worked on these, I tried for about a week”

<Ruby> “Oh, I know you did.” *Ruby mutters darkly, thinking it over but thinking it would probably end up not working, at least on the collars* “Collars, no. Probably not.”

<Anna> “What about unlocking them? Or giving us the way to unlock them?” *Anna wants to look at Ruby’s to see if it’s different but she can’t se it.* “Let me see yours.”

<Ruby> “No way in Hell, Anna. Mine’s just a little less… possessive than yours.” *Stepping away further until she’s as far as she can go, Ruby hisses the words out, crossing her arms under her chest* “And again, probably not. These are blocked from my abilities, otherwise I would have cracked it off before now. During whatever crazed attempt to kill yourself you were going through.”

<Anna> “So then you’re a coward not even willing to see if we can deal you’re collar off.” *Anna feels herself growing agitated at Ruby’s reluctance, if she can deal these collars off and get Ruby to break the deal she can try again to break what Crowley did to Gray.*

<Ruby> “I’m just not stupid like you. I’ve checked in with the leading expert on getting to walk about looking like a trained monkey, and the only way these things come off is through Crowley. Deal with it.” *Ruby raises an eyebrow at the other, not quite getting how thick the other must be to not understand what she was saying - it’s not going to work*

<Anna> “So you’re great demon powers can give people the ability to find Death, get his scythe but you can’t even try to unlock a piece of metal? Or was that it Crowley was just better than you even as a demon?” *Anna stands at the edge of the salt line as she tries to provoke Ruby into trying.*

<Ruby> “In case you haven’t realised from these babies..” *Ruby points towards her eyes, flashing them black and keeping it that way as she steps closer towards Anna again* “I’m not a crossroads. Sure I can make deals, but I don’t have to - and I sure as hell already know you’re little idea WONT FUCKING WORK ON MY COLLAR SO WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I!” *That Anna was still pushing her was pissing her off enough to scream into the other’s face, glaring darkly as her face flushes in anger*

<Anna> *Anna runs her hand through her hair and she huffs.* “Fine then you’re no use. You won’t even try and to deal for a way to unlock them then get out. Oh wait, you can’t and Crowley will be back eventually.”

<Ruby> “Hold up a second missy. You were trying to suggest to deal /off/ these, not a way /to/ get them off.” *She’s still frowning, voice lowering back down again as she heard the change in proposition, though it also set off another round of anger through her* “Learn to fucking speak and suggest your ideas, angelcake, because to get a way /to/ unlock them, not unlocking them themselves..”

<Anna> *Anna shrugs at Ruby, stepping back from the salt line* “I did speak, getting them off instantly or getting a way to get them off all end in the same result, the collars off. There’s not guarantee that if Crowley dies these come off, if you want to live with them for eternity, go for it.”

<Ruby> “You… you have no fucking clue about deals do you? It’s all in the words. Getting them off is not something I can do, I told you that. And that’s not the same as getting a way to then get them off - which is something I /can/ do. Fucking Lucifer, I thought you angels were supposed to be /smart/.” *Ruby glares back at her, shaking her head in something between exasperation and amusement*

<Anna> *Anna chuckles, she’s amused at Ruby’s frustration. She knows very well about deals and how the wording works.* “So are you willing to work with me on a way to get them off? Or should I get you a chair to get comfortable and while I’m out I’ll leave the tv on infomercials for you.”

<Ruby> “Maybe you should make yourself absolutely clear as to what /your/ end of the deal will be, Anna. Given I can choose to completely ignore you and get some more unknowing creature to do it for me..”

<Anna> “The collars and something else I don’t want to talk about yet till I see if we can remove the collars. Of course, I make the deal and you break the contracts right away since I know you can do that.” *Anna gets serious as she walks back over to the salt line, she’ll break it once Ruby agrees.*

<Ruby> “What do /I/ get?” *Ruby just stares back at her, not sure Anna even understands how little she has to deal with* “I don’t get your soul, you don’t have one - and from what I can tell you’ve sold basically everything else. What do I get for helping you, rather than just finding some schmuck and getting them to ask for whatever will break these?”

<Anna> “I don’t turn you over to Crowley and tell him you came to me with this idea.” *Anna smiles at Ruby*

<Ruby> *That makes her laugh, shaking her head* “No deal. I highly doubt he’d be anything but amused at my trying to escape, he probably already knows I went to ask his little shadow toy about it. That’s not a good enough incentive.”

<Anna> “What do you want then Ruby? How about you tell me that instead.” *Anna can feel the frustration creeping back up, she’s so close to getting a real chance of finding a way around all of this and Ruby’s being greedy, she thought getting the collar off would be good enough.*

<Ruby> “Your sword.” *Rubys says it plainly, smirking slightly at the frustration showing up on Anna’s face* “Your angelblade.”

<Anna> “Why would you want that? And if you haven’t noticed, I don’t have one anymore.” *Anna doesn’t trust the demon with something that can wound and kill angels.*

<Ruby> “Oh really? You don’t have yours stashed away somewhere? You go and get it, and bring it back - and I will come with whatever it is that will get us out of these things. Deal?” *Ruby continues to smirk knowingly, quite sure that Anna would decide it was worth it in the end* “This is the point where we kiss and take off.”

<Anna> “No I don’t have one, haven’t had one in a while.” *Anna rolls her eyes at Ruby, she never expected Ruby to want an angel blade and she just isn’t sure that she can give her one even though she knows there are some at the bar.*

<Ruby> “Quit lying, Anna. You want that collar off, don’t you?” *The hesitance was making up for much more than it wasn’t, as Ruby waits for Anna to just agree*

<Anna> *Anna sighs kicking the salt line* “Fine, I can get one more than likely, why do you want it. Only angles can kill another angel.”

<Ruby> “Again with the lies. Or at least, it will be. So we have ourselves a deal - an angelblade for the way to unlock these.” *Ruby doesn’t bother waiting, keeping the words as short and untwistable as possible, before reaching over the broken salt line for the other getting more enjoyment out of the way the sharp kiss will probably freak out the other*

<Anna> *Anna would have been freaked out months ago but after everything recently, kissing Ruby isn’t even close to the top of her list of horrible experiences and she breaks it looking back at Ruby.* “Now get out.”

<Ruby> *Frowning for a second, Anna’s reaction brings out a mean laugh - realising that whatever must have been happening to the other must be pretty bad that she didn’t get more than a bland reaction* “Yeah yeah, you just get that blade” *Giving another laugh, Ruby vanishes away, searching the way the deal was tugging at her to try and find her end of the bargain*

<Anna> *Anna turns once Ruby is gone heading back to Gray’s hotel. She didn’t tell the demon that she had one in ehr bedroom at the bottom of her bag. She didn’t use it and hadn’t used it in a long time but it was a still a comfort to have.*

#7 - Ruby tells Anna about how to get her collar off from Jo, and Ruby gets her ARCHANGEL BLADE!!!! 

<Anna> *Anna has been to see Gray and she’s come back, she doesn’t trust staying for long for a number of reasons, Crowley mostly but it’s hard to be around him like he is and she’s almost the point of praying for something to help him. She still hasn’t heard back from Ruby and she’s getting close to summoning the demon to find out what she knowns.*

<Ruby> *It had taken a few days before the blonde hunter had left her house, but Ruby had caught her the second she stepped outside, explaining the situation, their own joint efforts and garnering an agreement and test on the demon’s own collar before getting the other to agree to help the angel. She’d found a way to get rid of the collars, and now she was set on getting payment. Appearing in the same corner as before, Ruby smirks as she announces* “Where’s my angelblade Anna?” *Her own collar was dangling, open and useless, from her hand*

<Anna> *Anna looks over hearing Ruby’s voice and she looks at the collar hanging in her hand.* “How did you get it off?” *Walking over to Ruby she moves the demons hair, looking at her neck to make sure that it isn’t a trick, she’s having to push down the hope that she can soon get Gray back to normal.*

<Ruby> “Our little hunter friend has a very special knife. She won’t hand it over, understandably - but as per our arrangement I just had to find a way to get these off.” *Ruby smirks, not reacting at all to the invasion of her space, tossing the collar far off to the other side of the room* “Barbie said she’d get yours off for you too, just so long as she keeps her little toy.”

<Anna> *Anna steps back blinking as Ruby tells her how she got it off.* “Jo..has a way to remove them?” *She wonders if her hearing has gone out on her because Jo hasn’t been in contact since she ran into her at Grays and nothing was said then to her about a knife.*

<Ruby> *Nodding, the demon leans back against the wall behind her, tilting her head to a said as she takes in the other’s shock* “She didn’t seem aware that she could, but I knew as soon as we made our little deal.”

<Anna> *Anna just frowns as she walks away to the bedroom, wondering why Jo has something like that and why she hasn’t said anything to anyone.* “How did Jo react when you said something to her about it?” *She asks as she comes back into the front room a few moments later, blade in hand.*

<Ruby> “Surprised. Very surprised. And she seemed reluctant to get it out as it was.” *Ruby’s eyes catch straight onto the blade in the other’s hand, smirk growing on her lips* “Though was happy enough to agree to help you out provided her little monster isn’t around when she does.”

<Anna> “So Grey doesn’t know either..” *Anna shakes her head she doesn’t know whats going on but she wants to find out. Closing her hand tighter she doesn’t want to give the blade over to Ruby and she hesitates.*

<Ruby> “Either that or she doesn’t want you around him for some reason.” *Shrugging her shoulder, the demon pushes forward, holding her hand out for the blade* “My end’s been done, time to cough up or get your runners on, Anna.”

<Anna> *Anna flips the blade around and offers it to Ruby, she’s still frowning at the fact Jo hasn’t said anything to anyone.* “We know it works on collars, will it work on anything else Crowley’s done? Do we know that or did Jo say anything about why she had it?”

<Ruby> *Quickly snatching the weapon before Anna could take it off of her, Ruby vanishes and appears behind her, the point of the blad pointing directly into Anna’s back while her other hand grips tightly around Anna’s hair, jerking tightly* “Oh I don’t know, frankly I don’t care why the little hunter is getting /actual/ presents from Mr. Almighty - she seemed pretty shut up about it at the time though. What I care about is you thinking a pathetic, featherless ex-angel like yourself can push me around.”

<Anna> *Anna steps back as Ruby grabs it and leaves, she’s not surprised at the demon and she’s about to step back when she feels the sharp point press against her skin and then the pain of her head being jerked back suddenly by her hair makes her yelp in surprise as Ruby talks behind her.* “You got your part of the deal and out of the collar!”

<Ruby> “True, but that doesn’t make up for the other times - and trust me, track this back and you threw the first stone. I’m not trying to destroy the world any more, and yet you yelled against me the same thing you did. So.. what’s to stop me from just killing you here?” *Ruby hisses, twisting her hand at Anna’s head sharply* “Especially now the collar’s off.”

<Anna> *Anna reaches back trying to get Ruby’s hand out of her hair, gasping as the demon twists it harder. She’s not going to admit it but feeling the blade against ehr skin doesn’t unnerve her but the kind of blade is making her nearly panic. It’s an automatic response that she can’t control even though she’s sure that it would just be like any other stab wound now.* “Nothing..”

<Ruby> “And what’s going to stop me in future from not just whipping this out and driving it through you?” *The way Anna was struggling made her smirk, the control definitely back in her corner and for once the both of them knew it*

<Anna> “Means that you plan on not killing me now if you’re threatening to stab me later with it.” *Anna winces feeling it scrape against her skin, something ironic and humilating to die as a human to an angelblade she thinks.*

<Ruby> “It does, doesnt it. Or maybe this little thing won’t kill you if I aim it just right - stab now, kill later.” *She shifts the blade so it was pressing at an angle against Annas shoulder blade, so if Ruby felt inclined it would slide cleanly underneath and out without hitting anything vital* “But whats stopping me, Anna? What power will you have to stop me? Ill give you a hint, it starts with ‘n’”

<Anna> *Anna whimpers feeling her move the blade and she swallows* “What is it with you demons and listening to the sound of your own voice..” *She’s not sure she can get rid of Ruby with an exorcism before the demon stabs her or if that would just prompt Ruby to kill her and she shakes her head.*

<Ruby> “Let’s call it over compensating, or at least most of them are. I, on the other hand, just want to point out trying to hurt me to get some benefit or exorcising me, is not a good idea. Just for future reference.” *Giving Anna a sharp shake, the tip of the blade pushing into Anna’s shoulder almost half an inch before she smokes back to her previous spot, letting the other go. Ruby sneers at her* “Go talk to Jo. And don’t fuck with me in future, alright?”

<Anna> *Anna breathes in sharply feeling the blade sliding into her skin before it stops and she’s left nearly falling when Ruby lets her go and she staggers back, her hand reaching behind her as she can feel the blood flowing down her skin. Glaring at Ruby she smiles* “Wonder what Crowley’s going to have to say about you playing with me again and getting his collar off…”

<Ruby> “Wonder what he’ll say about your little blonde friend helping me. I’d guess /she’s/ putting more on the line helping both me and /you/ than I have.” *Ruby sneers back, crossing her arms as she tucks the blade into the belt loop of her jeans until she can find somewhere safer* “I guess we /both/ should keep our mouth shuts unless we want all three of us on the chopping block, hmm.”

<Anna> *Anna just glares at Ruby, her shoulder aching and she’s not sure she’s going to be able to reach the spot on her own.* “Leave.” *Anna waves a hand dismissing Ruby, turning to walk away from the demon.*

<Ruby> “Gladly. Go talk to Barbie.” *Ruby grins, running a hand over the hilt of her new weapon before she vanishes, set on hiding low again*

#8 - Ruby and Anna make an agreement about getting the brands off of Gray

<Anna> *Anna stands in the apartment..she’s debating putting down a salt like after the last time but she wants to get Ruby to agree and if she starts out hostile it may just make Ruby leave so she lights the match and throws it in the bowl.*

<Ruby> *She’d been enjoying the freedom without the regular shocks the redhead must have been causing, but when she feels the pull of a summonings, Ruby is surprised that there isn’t a line or trap as she looks about the apartment* “You ever think of going bacl to your little protective den, angelcake? Got to be better than here.”

<Anna> *Anna shrugs and moves back sitting down.* “One place is as good as another.” *She chews on her lip trying to decide how to word what she wants from Ruby.*

<Ruby> “Right..” *Ruby gives the other a scrutinizing look for a second before leaning back on the wall nearest to her, arms folded* “So, what did you want /this/ time?”

<Anna> “Jo has a way to free Gray but she won’t. I want to make a deal to unbind him now that we know there is away.��� *Anna looks at Ruby and she takes a breath as she watches the demon, her eyes scanning the body of the woman she’s wearing to see if she can see her angel blade.*

<Ruby> “Oh really? Got any idea why she won’t, because Barbie seems to be pretty comfortable these days - maybe Crowley doesn’t want him unbinded and the princess is listening to daddy dearest.” *Ruby sneers slightly as she speaks, internally rolling her eyes that Anna seems to think that she has anything of use to her to deal with or that Ruby’ll just jump into them.*

<Anna> “I don’t know, I don’t care. Screw what Crowley told Jo and screw Jo’s reasons.”  *Anna stands up and she walks over to Ruby.* “Why do you care about protecting Crowley’s orders? You should enjoy the aspect of getting Barbie in trouble with him.”

<Ruby> “Don’t tell me what I should and shouldn’t do, Anna. You’re the begger here, not a chooser.” *Anna’s approach sets off alarm bells, especially with the words she was saying as Ruby looks at her. One hand reaching behind her, she makes as though she’s reaching for what’s now her angelblade, a warning heavy in the action* “I don’t care about it, I just need to think on how to actually get something /out/ of this.”

<Anna> *Anna doesn’t move, if she stabs her again stepping back won’t exactly stop her.* “I know I’m the begger and I’m willing to pay at this point whatever you want.” *She smiles at Ruby, wondering if the demon is willing to deal, she’s beyond caring what price the demon names, it can’t be worse than how things are now.*

<Ruby> “Well…” *Ruby rolls her neck, looking skywards as she runs through her mind what she might need. Letting loose the psychopath should be fun enough, and if she can cover her tracks then she’ll be able to get out with her agreement with the blonde still in tact. It’s just a case of working out how to fix this* “For your complete and utter silence on my participation, that should you reveal which demon dealt with you for this - your little monster will go back to being the powerless little twerp he is right now. Because that’s the only way I will get a single iota of worth out of this” *Or at least as much as she could right now.*

<Anna> “You’ll do this for my never mentioning your participation?” *Anna raises a brow at Ruby, this seems far to easy but if that’s why Ruby wants then she can easily never mention her to anyone about this.*

<Ruby> “Not to anyone, not at all. And I will.” *Ruby smirks back at Anna’s almost confused look* “Like you said, getting Barbie in trouble is fun enough.”

<Anna> “Fine I won’t mention a single word to anyone.” *Anna shakes her head but she can live with this deal. It’s simple enough and she can do this easily so she smiles.* “You have a deal.”

<Ruby> “Let’s just hope the little monster or the hunter doesn’t try to get it out of you.” *Ruby sneers, as she reaches out to grip the back of Anna’s head - barely taking the smallest amount of time necessary to make the deal official. The second she lets Anna go, the briefest flashes of the suggestion of what needs to be done -the image of Grey like the other currently and Gray’s back slashed across- left up for her to interpret fill her head, sneer shifting into a knowing grin* “Well, now we know why hunter barbie wouldn’t play ball. You’re going to have to move the iron on your monster’s room, angelcake, and for what I’m going to do you might want to put him under.”

<Anna> “What do you have to do?” *Anna nods, moving the iron won’t be a problem and she can probably get Gray to take some pills to help him sleep since Ruby seems all the pleased with what she’s going to have to do to him.*

<Ruby> “You might want to find him some proper food too, while you’re at it. He’s going to need to heal some things, but like you said - you’re willing to pay any price.” *Ruby is already trying to formulate the best way in and out for her, with as little damage control for her own image as possible - not really caring what it might do to the monsters*

<Anna> *Anna nods, not sure if she should let him fee from her or maybe pay prostitute to be waiting the the room for when he wakes up and let him take it out on her.* “You didn’t say what you had to do to free him?”

<Ruby> “What makes you think I’ll tell you?” *Ruby smiles vaguely, shifting her weight as she moves away from the other - thinking that jumping suit for the other monster might be the smartest move*

<Anna> “You’re right don’t tell me, that way as you said if people try and get it out of me, I won’t know.” *Anna walks off, picking up a bottle of water and rinsing her mouth out from the kiss.*

<Ruby> *Ruby laughs at Anna’s rationalising why she shouldn’t know, even if the curiousity and desperation rolling off her to know what might happen to her precious little monster said otherwise. Still laughing, the demon appears beside Anna and pins her with a look* “I’ll be ready the second you move that iron - so you better hop to it, angelcake. Boyfriend’s going to be back.”

<Anna> *Anna jumps when Ruby just appears and she glares at her now starting to understand why humans find it annoying from angels and demons* “Fine, it’ll be moved tonight.”

<Ruby> “Good. I’ll take care of the rest.” *With that Ruby disappears away, automatically heading to storage area Jo was keeping the dagger in - figuring on her way the easiest way to convince the middle aged, balding owner*

#9 - Ruby meets with mindwiped!Anna

<Anna> *Anna hadn’t got the nerve up to go see Grey again, she had walked halfway across town to where the house was he shared with Jo but then she changed her mind. She couldn’t shake the idea that Crowley had changed the minds of him and Jo and she really didn’t want to think about it with Gray. Turning around she starts down the side walk, keeping the sweater pulled up around her, hiding the bruises on the side of her face that Crowley had left her.*

<Ruby> *Ruby’d been meaning to go prod the blonde hunter about getting her ass into gear over Crowley, when she noticed the redhead walking away from the house. The demon didn’t think Anna would have known where they lived to be able to be there at all, and deciding to see how her little arrangement went, Ruby appears in front of her with a snarl and slam of the other woman back into a nearby tree* “So.. Little Miss Angel all happy now her dirty works been done?”

<Anna> *Anna doens’t pay attention to the people around her, she guesses she should but she’s not a hunter and she doesn’t think anything dangerous would be in a town where hunters come to rest and drink. The appearance of a woman infront of her makes her jump, her mind instantly jumps to Gray and before she can ask if the woman is a monster she finds herself against a tree, the breath knocked from her as the woman snarls something about  dirty work. Blinking as she see’s stars she gasps trying to form a solid thought.* “Who..what are..”

<Ruby> “Don’t play dumb with me, Anna, because I’m really not in the mood. Your little game has obviously set /my/ plans to get rid of that psychotic crazy calling himself the king of all back a few fucking weeks - which I didn’t realise at the time, so seriously.. don’t try to fuck with me right now, Anna.” *Ruby sneers back at her struggling and blinking, finding the reaction amusing even as the anger at how badly hell is going to shit for her with Crowley’s psychosis still happening rolls over her*

<Anna> *Anna doesn’t understand, she pushes back against the tree trying to get away from this woman. She doesn’t know what plans there are and she tries to move around the tree, if she can maybe she can run or someone will see what’s going on and help her.* “I don’t know you! I don’t know anything about a game. I’m not trying to mess with you, I promise!”

<Ruby> *When Anna struggles and keeps squirming it just makes Ruby sigh, focussing for once on using her powers to keep Anna in place and stop moving* “What the hell are you on about you crazy bitch? I though Barbie stopped forcefeeding you the magic pills.”

<Anna> *Anna shakes her head quickly, watching Ruby. She knew she was a demon that she had a history with her, that she tortured her and she tries very hard to not make the woman angry.* “I woke up in a hospital, thought I had been in a wreck that messed me up. I..I’ve been learning that wasn’t true from others like Gray and Jo. It’s some kind of training or something from Crowley.”

<Ruby> “And you’re still talking to Barbie and the Beast. Intruiging.” *Ruby smirks to herself looking at the other curiously* “So you’ve got no recollection whatsoever other than what they tell you?”

<Anna> *Anna shakes her head again. Barbie must be Jo and Gray..* “No, I was told that I knew you before but that’s all. I’m not a danger to you, I promise.”

<Ruby> “Youre right you’re not a danger. You’re just some shriveled up ex-power whose had her brain sucked drier than a wraith on a bender.” *Ruby laughs to herself at Anna’s reaction, shrugging a shoulder at the others promises - figuring a promise from the redhead meant next to nothing*

<Anna> “So just let me go then..” *Anna tries to pull away from the tree but the power keeps her there and she doesn’t understand so many things that people say now.* “I was never anything, just a college girl..I grew up in a church, I don’t know why everyone is so interested in me, I know I did things I don’t remember and I’m sorry!”

<Ruby> “You are far too amusing right now, Anna. Now tell me..what do you remember? Actually remember.” *Ruby grins widely, moving around to stand before Anna with a wicked grin*

<Anna> *Amusing is hte last thin she wants to be so she tries to make herself as boring as possible to the demon.* “I was in college,  my parents were killed and I had a break down at their murder. I dropped out of college and found myself working in this city at a bar.”

<Ruby> “Cute… I remember you when you were like that. So cute. So naive. Absolutely terrified of me until we became best buds.” *Anna recollecting what Ruby remembered sending Sam and Dean to go and pick up makes her laugh, tilting her head to the side* “And what have you been told?”

<Anna> *Anna doesn’t want to be cute, she doesn’t understand what Ruby means by what she was like that before and it makes her feel sick to her stomach.* “That I’ve done bad things, that I’ve had relationships with people..”

<Ruby> “Oh come on, don;t be coy.” *Ruby snickers, prodding the others shoulder to see if she’d react like she used to to her touch*

<Anna> *Anna flinches back at Ruby’s prodding.* “I don’t know what you want to know..I knew Jo, Grey hates me, you don’t like me, Gray doesn’t want to be with me because of Crowley and Crowley says I need retrained thanks to Grey telling him that we..slept together..and trying to make me believe that. So I don’t know what I’ve been told!”

<Ruby> “That’s all I wanted to know. …And who do you believe, red?” *Ruby grins wider, tilting her head to the side as she notices a few people wandering past and mutes Anna until theyre gone*

<Anna> *Anna starts to answer but then Ruby squeezes her throat, silencing her till the people are gone and once they are out of sight she’s allowed to speak.* “Gray..I believe him and Jo..I don’t know to believe Grey and Crowley..he can make me think whatever he wants me too if he wants..”

<Ruby> “You know the monsters can too, right? They can make you think things and do things that they want you to.” *Anna’s words about Crowley and obvious trust in Gray makes her want to cause trouble, especially after Ruby’s plans to debunk Crowley have taken their sweet time*

<Anna> *Anna didn’t know and she just stares at Ruby* “I..didn’t know. I..know about Gray, what he is and Grey. That one of them kills, one doesn’t..but they can’t do anything to your memories can they?”

<Ruby> “They can if they want to. Those boys are.. they’re very dangerous when you realise just /what/ they can do.” *She almost hisses the words out, moving around the tree and almost reappearing beside Anna’s other side, smirk still in place* “Why couldnt they do things to your memories if they wanted to? They give impulses, desires, ideas. They plant a thought in your head..”

<Anna> *Anna jumps when Ruby appears on her other side, she doesn’t like the expression on the demon’s face, it made her feel like mouse being played with before a kill and she bites her lip, speaking quietly.* “Gray..wouldn’t. I don’t know about Grey..he..really hates me and I could see him doing it.”

<Ruby> “What makes you think Gray hasn’t? He might have tampered so much you can’t remember that he hasnt.” *Ruby smirks wider, reaching out a hand to brush the other’s neck tauntingly* “I’ve known you longer than all of them, every single one of them. I knew you back in the hospital days, actually. And I never thought you’d ever want to be with a monster like that.”

<Anna> *Anna tries to move away from Ruby’s touch, closing her eyes as she tries to shut out the words, everyone is telling her that memories could have been messed with and she’s not sure what to believe from anyone now.* “How did we meet, why would I talk to you, you’re a demon..”

<Ruby> “I sent some friends of mine to get you out of the hospital. You were in danger there, and I sent them your way to save you. It’s..kind of their job. And don’t be such a racist.” *Ruby smirks to herself as she moves back from the other, still not releasing her*

<Anna> “Sent friends?..Danger? Why was I in danger.. I don’t even understand how I became involved in any of this, I’m nobody, I come from a simple family..why me?” *Anna watches as another couple walk by, biting her lip as she thinks about calling out but she doesn’t want to get them hurt.*

<Ruby> “Because Anna, you’re special. But no one is going to tell you why at all.” *Ruby lets out a loud laugh, staring back at the other as she seems to realise the predicament she’s in*

<Anna> “Why? Why won’t they tell me anything?” *Anna looks at Ruby, almost pleading. The fact that everyone is talking around subject with her is wearing her down.  Only Gray had been open and blunt but maybe Ruby would tell her.* “Please..”

<Ruby> *Ruby sighs, looking at the other before smirking again* “Well, think about what people have called you, Anna. Really think about it. Their nicknames, their taunts, or just greetings. Try and find the connection about what it is about /you/ that makes you so so special. Because trust me, no one can keep their mouth shut about it, and you never could either.”

<Anna> *Anna hits her head against teh tree in frustration, fighting the hold that Ruby has on her. She’s doens’t know what Ruby’s talking about she’s been called angelfish, Ruby greeted her with angel..* “I’ve been called everything from bitch to angelfish to angel..but that’s just names people use.. I don’t understand what you mean.”

<Ruby> “…really? You can’t understand at all when something is being repeated, and I’m guessing from different sources too. Did Crowley take awya that brain of yours as well, or was that your monster?” *Ruby shakes her head, rolling her eyes at Anna*

<Anna> “I’m just a human!” *Anna practically screams at Ruby, she’s nothing more than that, there’s no way she could be anything else, she passed all the tests the hunters did on her.* “I’m just human..I don’t understand, I don’t.. I hate this..I hate all of you knowing and I’m not the kind of person that tortures demons or monsters. I don’t do bad things to people!”

<Ruby> “If that’s what you want to believe, Anna, go for it.” *Ruby snickers, dropping down the forces holding Anna back*

<Anna> *Anna stumbles forward when the powers let her go and she looks at Ruby.* “When you appeared..you said dirty work, what dirty work? I want to know, why were we working together?”

<Ruby> “Oh no, we weren’t working together. You were threatening and blackmailing me to help you. Theres a difference. I /work with/ Barbie, but you /made/ me do your dirty deeds.” *Ruby sneers back at her, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow*

<Anna> “How could I make you do anything, you’re a demon..” *Anna shifts from foot to foot, something is screaming at her to stop but she can’t and she keeps asking questions.* “What dirty work Ruby?”

<Ruby> “Easily, you /really/ like being Crowley’s favored pet. It means you think you have liberties that the rest of us don’t.” *She snarls the words out, tilting her head to the side and shaking it with a laugh* “You’ve probably already heard about it, especially if you’ve spoken to Mr Grumpy Pants.”

<Anna> *Anna runs her hands through her hair in absolute frustration and she glares at Ruby* “If I knew would I be asking! If I’m dense it’s because someone’s messed with my brain, what’s your excuse?!”

<Ruby> “No, you’d be demanding that everyone bend over and do as you say. I don’t have an excuse though, I’m not dense. Infact, I’m possibly the greatest mastermind around. Who happens to be very busy, so if you’ll excuse me.” *Ruby sneers back at her, letting out a laugh as she disappears away*

<Anna> *Anna looks on where the demon was before making a sound of total frustration, walking back home as quickly as she can, really thinking about how she’s starting to dislike everyone.*

#10 - Ruby being Ruby

<Anna> *Anna hadn’t heard from Gray sincce they last talked, fought, whatever and her last conversation with Jo only helped her in her choice. She came home, took up the iron chains, swept up the salt and she tossed away everything but the cell phone from the bar. Everyone else could live like this stuff did exist, she could too. She went to scanning the paper for a new job and once she had one she would ditch teh cell phone she had from the bar, cutting the last ties she had to it.*

<Ruby> *Ruby’d been bored, Hell was a shambles and she wasn’t wanting to hang around down there or near any olther demons until she knew what was going on - what plays Lilith or the other demons were going to pull out next. So she went back to spying on those she had indebted or tied in some way to her - except the hunter-monster house was empty and that just spelt boredom, so she turned towards the redhead’s apartment, appearing over her shoulder and peering down at the newspaper* “You should give the seedy looking advert for ‘female assistants’ a call. You’re good at selling yourself, might as well be for money now, angelcake.”

<Anna> *Anna jumps at the sudden sound of a voice over her shoulder and she stands up quickly turning around, already turning red at what Ruby had said to her.* “Go away. I don’t want anything to do with you, any of you.” *She didn’t like what Ruby had said about selling herself and she just glares at the demon as she grabs the paper folding it back up quickly*

<Ruby> “Oh, don’t be a child. Let’s have a looksy.” *Ruby smirks back at Anna, reaching over her to yank the paper from her hands, opening it flat on the table in front of her, keeping the other woman pinned in her spot with a hand over either shoulder, scanning the paper* “Table dancer, not your style. Admin assistant, well - I’m sure you’d be /very good/ at getting your work done, lets circle that.”

<Anna> *Anna closed her eyes in sheer frustration. Shouldn’t demons be afraid of angels or whatever she was supposed to be.* “I said go away!” *She couldn’t stand up and the feel of Ruby standing over her was making her skin crawl*

<Ruby> “And I said, don’t be a child.” *She snaps back, flipping a page of the paper over far too gently for the angry tone, before turning her head to look at the other woman* “Or I’ll have to punish you like one. We’re looking for a bogus job for you, so lets try to behave like adults for a few seconds, okay?”

<Anna> “Punish..maybe you should go into the porn industry. I’m sure there’s plenty of girls there willing to sell their souls to you.” *Anna doesn’t look at that paper as Ruby turns the pages.“ "Why are you here?”

<Ruby> “Deano did want to see the both of us, so how about if you join, I join.” *The sarcasm comes easily as Ruby keeps flipping without looking away from the other, far too curious trying to work out what the other was thinking taking down the iron and salt, and looking for work* “What are you trying to do here, Anna?”

<Anna> “Find a job what does it look like.” *She doesn’t know who Deano is and she doesn’t care. She huffs slumping back in the chair not fighting Ruby’s hold. It’s like waiting out a child to get bored she realizes.*

<Ruby> “Why would you bother doing it /this/ way though? Why not try to sell off what you have instead of a shiney bright soul for whatever dream job you could make?” *Ruby smirks slightly as the other stops fighting to get rid of her*

<Anna> “Because there’s nothing to sell. You know that and I just want to go back and be normal. I’m done with this life and the people that come with it. I want..I want the life that I remember back.” *She’s aware of just how much she sounds like she’s whining and she crosses her arms.* “So just leave me alone.”

<Ruby> “I’m afraid I can’t let you do that, Dave.” *Anna’s petulance at wanting to ignore the bed she’d made before and forgot about amused the hell out of the demon, moving one hand from the table to ruffle at the other’s hair with a mocking smirk now that there was nothing to fear of Anna getting pouty and calling either of her big protectors* “You see, you’re not supposed to be normal. Never were.”

<Anna> *Anna slaps the hand away and runs her hand through her hair straightening it back.* “I can try. We control our lives. I just want to find a job, get away from the hunting.” *Glaring at Ruby she stands up crossing her arms.* “Why do you even care?”

<Ruby> “No actually, you don’t. Silly little humans think they do, and your trying to be a human makes you want to too. But really? You’re all just.. little clogs planned from birth until death.” *She speaks like she’s talking to a child, letting out a sigh, before continuing to talk as she turns her attention back to the paper* “Course, the whole Apocalypse being subverted kind of messed with that. But things always sort out - I’m sure one of your brother’s or sister’s will have started writing out a new book just so the whole place doesn’t go to anarchy. I should ask your brother next time I see him.”

<Anna> “I don’t have any siblings. I’m an only child.” *Anna reaches out grabbing the paper and ripping it in half before throwing it down. She feels childish right nowbut she just feels nothing but frustration and anger at Ruby’s taunting her.*

<Ruby> *Ruby lets out a laugh watching Anna tear up the paper, the reaction far quicker than she expected* “Don’t go pretending you don’t know what I’m talking about, featherless.”

<Anna> “That angel crap or whatever..I might have been one but I’m not now that’s obvious because you aren’t like running in fear or anything of me and I just don’t care. I’m done with it, I am. I’m done with Jo, with Gray..everyone can take their problems and just leave me out. I just want a life that I understand..” *Anna sits back down in the chair taking the pen on the table, fidgeting with the top*

<Ruby> “And that life would be, what, working in a crappy job all your life just because you don’t like being out of control of everything? For shame.” *She smirks down at the other woman* “And angels are only scary when you don’t know how to stop them. These days? I’ve learnt, so unlike the others of my kind, I’m not so fearful of the divine wrath. As for you… I’d suggest you take off your baby panties and go back to playing the big leagues with the squeaky little monster who might have a chance of scaring my kind off from bothering you.”

<Anna> “Yes I want a crappy job and crappy hours and maybe just the idea that nothing strange is going to come out of teh shadows at me or appear behind me! That monsters and demons are just not real!” *She hates that Ruby makes sense and she doesn’t want it to make sense.* “I’m not an angel, I’m not anything just a human and I don’t even know how to play with the monsters as you put it so what good would it do for me to stay in this life?”

<Ruby> “Oh please, you don’t want that. If you wanted that then the second you came back from the dead all free-willed and strong-willed up you would have regardless. You do what you want, Anna, always do - and you /don’t/ want to be a nine-to-five girl. Unless it’s pm to am.” *Ruby shakes her head at the others defense, moving around to lean her hip against the table* “You know how to play with the one monster you /actually/ like. The rest… are pretty much the same honestly. Such fickle, boring little things that lot. Not that demons are any better.”

<Anna> *Anna bristles at the continued jabs at her selling herself and she’s even more angry at Ruby’s attempt to talk about Gray.* “There’s no monster that I like, like that..not anymore and there won’t be another and you can go to hell with your continuing to call me a working girl!”

<Ruby> “Been there done that, lots of call girls down there.” *She snickers slightly at the other getting angry, the change in colouration on her face making it far more amusing than it would be otherwise* “I’ll quit with the working girl commentary when you stop lying. You wouldn’t get so angry if I wasn’t hitting a nerve.”

<Anna> “You’re very being here hits a nerve!” *Anna snaps throwing the pen at Ruby’s head.* “I’m not lyin about what I want! Everyone in this life is so screwed up including you and I just don’t want to deal with it!”

<Ruby> *Ruby catches the pen as it bounces off her cheek, twirling it between her fingers as she listens to Anna screeching thoughtfully before replying* “So, if your little old monster showed up at that door saying he was sorry for reacting like he did, and wanted to have a rational discussion about things, you wouldn’t want to deal with it? Even though you’re just as screwed up as all of the rest of them?”

<Anna> *Snorting she looks at Ruby before sitting down away from the demon* “It wouldn’t happen. Every is so stubborn and just I don’t know.” *Anna run her hand through her hair in frustration.* “I know I’m screwed up but I want to change, that’s why I want to be normal.”

<Ruby> “You’re really pathetic, you know that right?” *Ruby just stares at Anna as she moves about, obviously getting frustrated at the demons presence and questions, but that was all part of the point.* “You think being normal isn’t screwed up. That’s sheer idiocy I’d only expect… well.. of you.”

<Anna> *Anna just huffs.* “Right, I’m pathetic because I’m not runningback to the crazy that got me in this mess to start. Bite me Ruby. I’d be more pathetic if I spent all my time whining about Gray wanting to sleep around or the fact Jo’s supposed to be my friend but just mean.”

<Ruby> “Why don’t you just let him? Not like he’s going to revisit them. Or even actually do it if you don’t say no on request. Crazy thing about guys - put them on a leash and they’ll work out how to hang themselves with it to get off, leave them without a collar and they’ll stop growling at the other dogs, stick to their owners side - or failing that come bounding back when their master calls. And by their master, I mean their bitch.” *Ruby sneers back at Anna, shaking her head at the other’s assessment and honestly finding the chance to possibly screw about with the making up, again, to be worth the sappy talk now to see what happens after later down the track* “As for the bitchy hunter, unless she’s trying to roll you in oil and set you alight, she’s being nice. You both have all the right in the world to wanna kill one another.”

<Anna> *Anna doesn’t even know why she’s trying to justify herself to the demon but she feels defensive of the way Ruby makes her sound.* “I didn’t say he couldn’t! I just said that if he did I could as well..because it’s only fair. And then it just went down hill because it just seemed like all we had in common was sex and this is stupid, you need to leave. Just go !”

<Ruby> *Ruby lets out a louder laugh when Anna tries to shoo her offer, shaking her head shifting to sit atop the table rather than just lean on it, looking at the other* “Why should I? You can’t make me. Just a normal girl now, bet you don’t even have a gun lying around anywhere. So, I don’t think I will. Your hatred of practically everyone else but one another is another thing you have in common, Anna.”

<Anna> “I don’t hate anyone!” I just don’t like anyone. Everyone is stubborn and pig headed and just stupid!“ *Anna walks over to the kitchen grabbing the table salt, unscrewing the top.* "I don’t  a gun but I have salt..so you should go before things get uncomfortable for you.”

<Ruby> *When the other grabs the salt, Ruby lets out a laugh, disappearing only to reappear behind Anna, one hand grabbing the wrist holding the container* “And I can crack your wrist in an instant. Or see if the trick I did on your ankle would get the same reaction doing it to your hands as well.” *Tutting, she smirks back at the other* “You’re just as stubborn and pigheaded and stupid, Anna. it’s why you all really belong together. No one else sane enough would.”

<Anna> *Anna drops the salt container when Ruby grabs her wrist, she glad she doesn’t remember what Ruby did to her leg, the scars looked painful and the threat to do it to her wrist is enough to make her stand down.* “I don’t wnt to be like that! Why aren’t you listening? People can change, I want to change!”

<Ruby> “No they can’t. They just think they can. Delusion is one of the greatest parts of humanity, and you’re trying to very hard to be like them. Same as the other little monster - both decieve yourselves that playing human long enough will make you one of them, or that you can be like one.” *Ruby sneers at the other, pressing the front of her boot against the back of Ruby’s ankle with a growl before adding* “People don’t ever change. What they’ve done in their lives is what they’ll always be and will never be taken back. Why do you think even with the whole mumbo jumbo Sick Anointing that more and more people come and do the firey rumba? Get over your delusions Anna, you’re not changing again.”

<Anna> *Wincing Anna turns looking at Ruby* “What was your life like that you sold yourself to the pit. Is that how you know so much about being a whore? Just one more diseased girl, begging for pennies on their knees from men?”

<Ruby> “Not even in the slightest, and you don’t know a thing about the word diseased - least not any more. Don’t attempt to turn this mind game back on me, angelcake, we’re talking about you and how your dumb crusade to change yourself is pointless and futile beyond all else.” *Ruby grins darkly, twisting the others wrist*

<Anna> *Biting her lip she stares at Ruby* “So if people don’t change then you’ve always been a manipulative bitch. Coward that hides in the background. What did you get out of your deal Ruby?” *Anna hadn’t ever given much thought as to how old Ruby was but now she wondered about it.*

<Ruby> “I said we’re talking about you, Anna. Not me. I didn’t make a deal like you think, so if you’re that interested you can go snooping about for what it could have been.” *Ruby cocks an eyebrow back up at the other, looking blankly at her*

<Anna> “So you went down stairs through good old fashioned sin?” *Anna shrugs trying to pull her wrist away from Ruby.* “Did you kill your kids? Husband? How many times did you comit adultary like the town slut?”

<Ruby> *Anna’s attempts at narrowing down how se ended up downstairs makes her laugh, shaking her head in a fake sign of good nature before twisting harder* “D, none of the above. Really, you’re quite interested in what happened to a demon and with Hell for some normal girl, Anna.”

<Anna> *Anna yelps this time, her hand spasming as Ruby twists it.* “I..you won’t leave and if you’re going to hang out. Might as well get to know you. You enjoy knowing more about me than I know about myself.”

<Ruby> “This is true, I /do/ enjoy knowing more about people. I just don’t take kindly the the same being returned.” *Ruby hisses before dropping Anna’s hand, now that the salt was gone, before disappearing and reappearing back on the table top* “You don’t need to know anything about me. I’m not your /friend/. Maybe you should try turning that interest and 'get to know you’ attitude on people who actually /like/ you.”

<Anna> *Rubbing her wrists she can see the faint bruises already appearing she rolls her eyes.* “No one actually likes me. They tolerate me, it’s not the same as liking. And I tried to get to know people but all I keep getting is attitude. I’m sorry I don’t remember being a bitch..”

<Ruby> “If they didn’t like you, you’d be dead by now. No offense, people monsters or hunters don’t like tend to… disappear.” *Ruby smirks back at her, grinning widely when she notices Anna rubbing her wrists* “Let me put it like this, Red - your little friends, the ones you say you don’t like but for some reason feel like you do? If they didn’t like you, they’d have either killed one another or been fucking like rabbits for the last year long.”

<Anna> “Whatever Ruby.. Nothing that happens now matters. Everyone is just going to keep holding it over my head whatever I did before and I’m never getting past that with them.” *Anna sinks down into a chair, the fight going out of her as she shrugs her shoulders.*

<Ruby> “Maybe you should just try to find out difinitively what it is instead. Or tell them to shut the fuck up about the old Anna, because new Anna is here to stay and they should just suck it up that the numerous beatings and tearful screaming matches were all the renumeration they were going to get.” *She smiles cheerfully at the other, shifting to start picking at her nails now Anna’s not yelling*

<Anna> “Yea right..I don’t think any of tehm will let go of it and no one want to talk about it. Gray snapped finally and turned it back on me that I hurt him and I don’t even know what I did.”

<Ruby> “He got depowered, you reacted badly and treated him like his brother. It’s a point of pride for them /not/ to be one another, just so you know in future.” *Ruby continues cleaning at her nails, not caring whether sharing any bits of information for once aren’t getting her automatically something in return. She’s willing to wait for the profit later on.*

<Anna> “Treated him like his brother?” *Anna looks at Ruby, watching the demon cautiously.* “How did he get his powers back? Why did I react badly?”

<Ruby> “In case you didn’t get the memo - you and the little one hate one another. Another thing for you to know in future. And you made a deal with a demon for them to do what Barbie wouldn’t - cut up her little monster and free yours in exchange.” *She raises an eyebrow as she looks back at Anna, turning her attention to her other hand* “Dont know why you reacted weirdly though, probably because he got neutered power wise just to be able to be with you for a little while, and he wasn’t the same wanna be badass he usually tries to be. Freaked you out or something.”

<Anna> *Anna listens quietly, watching Ruby with her head tilted.* “So I made a deal, with Crowley? Is that why he says he owns my soul? or whatever I have?” *She’s not sure how much she can trust with what Ruby is saying but it goes back to what Gray said some and she feels bad for him.*

<Ruby> “Nah, you and Crowley had a different arrangement - bit fuzzy on the details of that actually. You don’t have a soul, you traded favors with whichever demon it was.” *Ruby carefully avoids mentioning which demon, shrugging a shoulder* “I found out because the damn thing couldn’t keep its mouth shut about torturing the other monster and waving about a super powered knife that belongs to Hunter Barbie.”

<Anna> “And what did we bargin for? What deals have we made? You keep talking about selling myself so I’m going to guess that we have made some kind of deal.” *Anna doesn’t trust Ruby and she wonders if this means she isn’t going to Hell then.*

<Ruby> “Us? We’ve had our exchanges. I’ve scratched your back, you’re required to free me from every Devil’s trap I find myself stuck in. Pretty good system, you and I.” *Ruby smirks back at Anna, not sure how she jumped to that conclusion that they’d made a deal but agreeing none the less*

<Anna> *Frowning she doesn’t like the idea that she has to let the demon out of a trap and she just nods.* “And what did I get out of it? What did you do for me?” *Anna wants to knock that smirk of Ruby’s face but she doesn’t know how.*

<Ruby> “I stepped into some.” *Ruby lets out a loud laugh at that, knowing that the other was never the most focussed on getting the words of a deal down and how much that one has come around to help her out*

<Anna> “No, what did you do for me?  There had to be something I wanted bad to make a deal to let you out of any trap you get into. You like talking so talk Ruby.” *Anna stands up walking closer to the demon looking at her as she dances around the subject.*

<Ruby> “I told you - I stepped into some traps for you. You needed a tester, I agreed on the condition you let me out of any trap I get stuck in.” *Ruby smirks widely at the other, not getting how the other didn’t understand her the first time* “You’re not very good at keeping track of the wording of things.”

<Anna> “Right.." *Anna sighs walking away, glancing back at the bedroom.* "Should I put you on the lease? Are you going to be moving in here or something?”

<Ruby> *She quirks an eyebrow at Anna’s looking about and comments, letting out another laugh as she shakes her head* “I thought you were done with the girly bits with your last landlady, angelcake. If we’re done playing Twenty Questions, I think I’ll leave you to your pathetic dellusion of normality for now.”

<Anna> *Anna rolls her eyes* “Please..don’t come back. You really don’t have to talk to me, it wouldn’t hurt my feelings if you’re the one person I never hear from again besides Crowley.”

<Ruby> “And here I thought you never wanted to talk to your friend and fuck again.” *Ruby snickers, before sending a glance about the house disinterestedly as Anna tries to shoo her off and gets impossibly boring now* “But I guess I’ll come back and annoy you in a few weeks. When you’ve finally either gotten drier than the Sahara desert or are back to being monster playfood.” *Ruby lets out another laugh\ before vanishing*

<Anna> *Anna sighs going and flopping down on the bed..she hates the whole ability of everyone to just randomly appear and disappear.*

[elliepassmore]

Crooked Kingdom Review

5/5 stars Recommended for people who like: heist stories, fantasy, multiple POVs, revenge, diverse characters CK picks up about a week after the end of SoC with a whole slew of new problems for our favorite gang. To recap, Van Eck the Elder has Inej, the Dregs are out 30 million, Kaz made a deal with Pekka Rollins, Nina took parem and is now addicted, but alive, and, newly discovered in chapter one, the Shu are sending weird Grisha/bird/angel things after other Grishas. Sounds like a Monday in the the Barrel. While the plot of the first book mainly focused on the Dregs getting a scientist out of the Ice Court, this one focuses on them getting their money's worth from Van Eck after he double-crossed them. Of course, nothing is ever that simple with Kaz, who has now made it one of his personal missions to not only get the $30 million from Van Eck with a little to spare, but also to ruin Van Eck's reputation. This is next to his other personal mission of tearing Pekka Rollins down brick by brick. The issues that arise as the Dregs try to accomplish this are ridiculous . Not ridiculous as in 'outside the realm of suspension of belief', but ridiculous as in 'wow, you guys just keep getting in more trouble of your own making.' Everything fits, even Kaz's admitted missteps--yes, Kaz admits a mistake aloud, I was shocked the first time reading it too--and it all plays surprisingly well into the story. I'll start with the characters that had more of an arc this story than the last one. First up is Jesper. Remember in the last book when he admitted to Inej he wagered his father's farm in a loan? Well that comes to fruition here, and his father, Colm, is dragged into Ketterdam as a trap to try and get the Dregs killed or captured. Having Colm in town drudges up a lot of Jesper's issues with gambling or, more accurately, his issues with losing at gambling. We got to see Jesper explain that gambling, much like shooting, help soothe what he referred to as 'the itch' of restlessness he has. Despite the tension between him and his father, it was nice to see the two of them interact, Bardugo wrote their relationship in such a way it's clear how much Colm cares for his son, even when he messes up. It also added some dichotomy between the group, showing that Jesper really is the only one with access to a parent who cares about them; Nina, Matthias, and Kaz's parents are dead, Inej's parents are a sea away, and Wylan's father cares more about money than him. The arc for Jesper in this story did focus a lot around his father, but it also focused on him making amends and growing as a Grisha. Jesper made some mistakes in the last book that he's working to fix now, and it leads to a pretty poignant exchange between him and Inej toward the end of the book that sticks with him. With his father involved, he's clearly struggling to reconcile the idea that he doesn't want to disappoint his father and wants to keep him safe with the reality that he's made some bad decisions andbecause of that his father isn't safe. Compounding on all these problems is Jesper also struggling with the idea of being Grisha and how to handle that moving forward. Things clearly changed for him during the Ice Court job, but he's not entirely sure how to handle that change. Nina wants him to go to Ravka, of course, but there's hesitation in Jesper that's telling him to stay away. There's also the fear of staying in Ketterdam as a Grisha. It's later discovered that this hesitation and fear is in part due to his mother being a Grisha and dying trying to help someone, and in part due to his father's reaction to her death. After being taught to shove down his powers for most of his life, the idea of living in harmony with them obviously scares Jesper, and another large part of his arc in this book is wrestling with that fear and this 'new' identity as Grisha and whether or not to let the fear stay--it is not entirely unfounded--and continue on as he has, or to embrace being Grisha and all that comes with it. Nina also has a stronger arc in this story than in SoC. At the end of the last book, she was still recovering from the effects of taking parem in order to help the group escape Fjerda. At the start of this one she's still struggling with the addiction. The danger of withdrawal is past, but she still craves the drug, even going so far as to beg Matthias for a little bit more. The toll the drug has taken on her is monumental, she's lost weight, has little appetite, seems perpetually tired, and has difficulty using her Heartrender powers, even on herself. I actually really liked Nina's story line in this book because we so rarely get to see addiction in fantasy formats, especially in the sort of light Bardugo frames it in. In other formats the addiction is phrased as a medication the character is addicted to and needs for their health or something that was forced upon them. Here, Nina took parem to save her friends, knowing what would happen, and life after taking it and becoming addicted is presented as hard and unpleasant and sometimes feels like it's not worth it. Everyone is clearly worried about Nina, taking quiet victories in her eating a little more than the day before or joking around or standing up to Kaz on behalf of the other Grisha in the city. A second part of Nina's arc, related to parem, is that her powers have become something different, something she feels isn't wholly natural. As a Heartrender, Nina had control over people's body and could raise or lower their heart rates, relax muscles, and even had a limited ability to heal and disguise people. All of this created a connection to people and to the living. After parem, her power's have manifested in having control of the dead--think, dust clouds and bones as shrapnel and, yes, even getting the dead walking--and to her it feels like a part of her is hollowed out because of it. So, on top of having to deal with still craving parem, she also has to reconcile how she views her powers and their/her place in the world. Matthias also has a lot of character development in this book. After/during the Ice Court job, he softened up around the crew and even began changing how he felt about Grisha. These changes really come to fruition here. The more he sees and learns about Grisha, their powers, and even how different cultures view them, the more he seems to understand that Grisha are as natural as humans and begins questioning just how the drüskelle and Fjerda managed to tilt so far in the opposite direction. He even recognizes something Nina did in the previous book--for all of Fjerda's dislike of the Grisha, it's almost certain the miracles of their saints and even the Ice Court itself is due to Grisha powers. As the book continues, Matthias begins recognizing more and more the toxicity of what the drüskelle preach and comes up with a loose idea that he wants to work to change the teachings and get rid of some of the hate. Wylan's story is changed in a major way over the course of the book when he realizes something his father kept from him (*SPOILER* his mother is not dead, but instead locked away in an asylum his father stuck her in when he decided he wanted a new wife and a new heir *SPOILER END*. He also advances as a character who sees more than just the good side and bad side of things, but also the middle, the idea that good people do bad things and that bad people are sometimes the most effective vessels for change for the better. Wylan also wrestles a bit with his identity in this book, as he's stuck looking like Kuwei Yul-Bo for most of it, a change he seems to not mind that much until Jesper gets the two of them mixed up. After the surprise discovery, and toward the end of the book, Wylan gets to decide what kind of person he's going to become. He seems to decide to take a page from the books of the people surrounding him try to have "every bit of bravado he'd learned from Nina, the will he'd learned from Matthias, the focus he'd studied in Kaz, hte courage he'd learned from Inej, and the wild, reckless hope he'd learned from Jesper, the belief that no matter the odds, somehow they'd always win" (427). Inej's goal for the future is clearly set in her mind during this book, and she seems eager to get her ship to hunt down slavers. That's not to say, however, that she's done with the crew. She's still the Wraith, she still sees Ketterdam as one of her homes, she's still a Dreg. As clear as her goals are, she wants to be around to help Nina and Matthias and the other Grisha get to safety, to help Jesper protect his father, to help Wylan get his back at his father, and of course to help Kaz get the money. She seems to worry more in this book, but has a greater feel of freedom about her as she does so. To me, reading her chapters, it felt like something had been lifted off her shoulders and she decided once and for all that she is Inej Ghafa, the Wraith, future slaver hunter, and that she will not settle for less, even if it means letting go of some people. I like how Inej's story line wraps up at the end of the book, and I would definitely be open to reading a book about what she does next, if Bardugo ever decided that's something she wants to pursue. Finally, Kaz. He's definitely gotten trickier in this book. Throughout the story he's playing two, three different games, arranging and rearranging people as he likes as if they're chess pieces, or whatever the chess-equivalent is in Ketterdam. He says things that hint, and sometimes almost blatantly tell, at what he's planning on doing, and even how he'll achieve it, but it's hard to catch if you aren't looking for it. Some things don't go to plan, a lot of things don't go to plan, and Kaz actually does admit to his mistakes aloud in this one, but he thinks quickly and has contingent after contingent ready to pluck from his mind. You definitely get to see how his mind works more in this one than in the Ice Court job, and with all the cogs that turn in his head I'm actually surprised he waited this long to oust Per Haskell. Of course, he plays the long-game, so it's entirely possible he had a plan like this in his head all along an the job from the first book and the issues with Van Eck just sped it along. Aside from further developing his criminal mastermind, we also get to see some development on the personal front. As opposed to the barely-held thread Kaz held onto when his skin was touched in the first book, we see him tolerating a little more in this one when he deems it necessary--bathroom scene, the Slat scene, the last scene. Further, we get to see him caring for the crew a little more overtly in this book, admitting to Jesper that he cares, working to get the Grisha to safety for Nina, trying to let his barriers down for Inej, and even essentially giving Wylan an empire (though I have no doubt Kaz plans on utilizing that at some point in the future). Bardugo left the ending for the book in a nice place. It can be complete here, the story lines from the first book are all closed, the characters each got a wrap-up, but it's also left open enough that she could come back and write more about the Dregs without it feeling forced or unnatural. I, personally, really want to know more about what Inej (Inej-Kaz team?) and the Jesper-Wylan team are up to, since I know we'll probably get to see more about Nina and the Grisha in King of Scars . Like SoC, the plot was mostly character-driven, but there was a lot of action and high-stakes moments throughout the story. There were twists I did and didn't see coming and, overall, I'm pretty happy with how the book went.

[jeaneybean]

Since two of our players were out, we pulled out this campaign

This was a really, really long session that had some hard bits in it for me as a person because boy howdy did I give Sam a lot of ammo to use against Vera.

SO the morning after the successful bank defense the Watch are all in the watchtower recovering from the previous night’s shenanigans, where even Y’all’d’ve was allowed to drink because Al was like “I watched him kill two people I’m not telling him anything he probably needs to drink.” The next morning there’s a group outside the tower, with a lot of city members coming wanting to join the watch.

The QC looks at the group and is like “Freddy, Ken, Y’all’d’ve, who’s the most sober?” As Y’all’d’ve was trying to sleep on Sara’s arm he was out of the running. The other two were sent off to get coffee. Al and Pava started their usual ribbing of the QC and she went outside to scare the shit out of people in order to give us enough time to sober up. With the help of coffee and bright ass sunlight the squads are ready to stand behind the QC as she gives her speech. Al stands back and makes punching motions with her fists because apparently she’s going to beat them up.

The other squads get paired up with their respective newbies and squad 3 gets pulled into the QC’s office for a conversation. Long story short: Because Sieger Medvedev is being an asshole and consistently requesting the guard look into the missing ring issue (not his wife’s probable murder) she’s sending her best and brightest. Namely: us three assholes. The half elf (Al makes sure to pull her hair back so her ears are showing), the human male (Who doesn’t do anything unless he has to) and the elf boy (Who has not worn shoes in his life and isn’t about to start now.).

They head to the residence and notice a few things about the staff: All Rutish maids, no butlers, the ones that seem to be in charge are the prettiest, and everything is very nice in the house. They’re shown into a sitting room and after fucking with the maids for a bit they get served tea. Y’all’d’ve perches on the couch, Pava drags a chair over from the desk to sit on it backwards, and Al sits on the seat at the head of the area, what would most likely be the seat Sieger would take.

Sieger guesses pretty quickly why they’re there, and Al wastes no time making his day as shitty as possible. Sieger tries to be like ‘Excuse you I just lost my wife and I am heartbroken’ but rolls a literal 1 on his bluff. Even Y’all’d’ve can tell he’s lying. Al states that they’ll need to search the house as a formailty, Siger is like ‘of course, you’ll be able to search all the rooms she was allowed in’ and Al is like ‘Uh no, all the rooms’ and Sieger was like ‘lol no come back with a warrant’ and Al was like ‘OKAY’ and goes out to talk to the queen commander.

Y’all’d’ve and Pava go to search Therese’ room where Pava keeps an eye on Sieger who’s trying to get away as much as he can. Y’all’d’ve is resepectful of the room as he can be, because he’s starting to feel bad for this dead lady. He talks with a bit with her maid and asks some questions, asks what other rooms in the house she frequents. The sitting room, the drinking room, the smoking room, her children’s nursery. (Me, as a player: OUCH) She hadn’t been anywhere else besides her room that day before she left. She’d been in good spirits (probably because she knew she wouldn’t be partying with Sieger, who essentially said he didn’t want to bring her along because she was an embarassment).

Meanwhile, Al tries unsuccesfully to convince QC to give her a warrant to search the whole place and QC is like ‘We have been trying for like 60 fucking years to get into that house to search and they haven’t slipped up I hate them so fucking  much Al do you understand I have had to deal with Sieger his whole fucking life and even my husband, Geoff the literal saint, considered letting him walk free a crime’. and Al is like ‘I need in that house I need in all the fucking rooms I hate him and I want him in jail how can we knock him down a few pegs’ And the QC gets a horrible idea. 

So they swing to pick up Y’all’d’ve and Pava and head over to a small but tall house and the QC asks the Butler to tell the Dame that she’s there. They get called up to the Dame’s room to meet her, and the woman that the QC has taken them to see, whom she thiinks will be all in for fucking with Sieger, is his Grandmother, the previous head of the family, Vera Medvedeva.

Dame Vera starts out the conversation with a quip about the QC not being able to die, which is a fucking great way to start the conversation. Al and Pava can both tell it’s a quip at her, but at the same time Dame Vera is playing. (She’s been playing this game for a while) It’s at about this point that the QC imminently regretted her decision of walking into this fucking house. Al is like ‘OH HEY GUESS WHAT YOUR SHITTY GRANDSON LOST YOUR FAMILY RING’ and Dame Vera is like ‘what a fucking moron’ and also was like ‘filing that away, he didn’t tell me, fucking idiot i find out everything’

Al and QC try to convince Grandmama to be on their side of ‘let’s throw your shithead grandson in jail’ and Grandmama is all”:) do you have proof :)” and Al is like ‘I will go to the queen herself if I have to get that smarmy son of a bitch in jail for a few nights” and Grandmama is all like ‘oh ho look at that, jack booted thugs. At least this is an improvement over the old group you ran with, they’re not killing people in the streets.” And Y’all’d’v’e is like -Jim face-

(Dame Vera also made a comment about Y’all’d’ve and hsi bathing habits that went mostly unnoticed)

The Dame is basically like ‘lol come back when you got some proof’ though she does give the group some nice backstory regarding Sieger, his ‘missing’ first wife, and some bits about the new wife. (She’s young, possibly thinks herself clever, hopefully not for her own sake, we all know what happened to Akulina) She also name drops his first son and adds that Sieger forgets he exsists half the time. Mentions his daughter that left the country.

(Dame Vera thought we were all ‘delightful’)

QC is exhausted and can’t even be too happy when Pava starts telling her about how everyone fucked with Sieger and she heads off. The idiots head back to the house to find out that the Master has left, but his son is there and Al is like ‘oh fuck yes, let’s talk to him’ but first talks with the maids in secret to get on their side and learn some info. She learns that Sieger went out, bought a pig, brought it into the basement and butchered it, and apparently that’s something he does when he’s in a temper and Al’s like ‘oh fuck that pig was me.’

After that in sashays Volya Medvedev who is like ‘oh, look at you. You, are you the one who perched on the couch?’ and Y’all’d’ve is like ‘uh yeah?’ “Pleas,e show me.” “Like this?” “Now sit on the couch.” “Okay?” “Rub your butt on it. Really get on there.” “I am uncomfortable.”

Meanwhile Al is like “TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT.” And Volya is like “OKAY” and strips off his jacket and shirt and Al goes to town looking for signs of abuse. There’s no brusing or anything, but he does have scars. Al asks him about a few and he’s like “Oh yeah, that happend -insert horrible childhood memory here-” “What about this one?” “Oh, that was -additional horrible memory here-” And Al’s like ‘what the actual fuck, also would you come down to the guard tower and make a statement’ and He’s like ‘BUY ME DRINKS’ and Pava’s like ‘AYYYY’ and Volya puts his jacket back on but forgets his shirt and it becomes A Look. Al leaves behind the quill/parchment she’d taken with her before after breaking hte quill and writing ‘eat a dick’ on the inside of the letter.

So they walk him back to the guard tower and Volya gives his horrible, horrible statement, telling horrible stories of his past. Mentions the time his dad tossed his sister down a flight of stairs. When asked about the basement that no one went in he’s like ‘YUP, THAT’S A FUCKING THING’. Straight up offers to work with the guard and go back and purposely provoke his father into hitting him. Jokes a bit about if his dad goes too far and kills him that he’ll swing and somehow only Y’all’d’ve catches that he’s not joking. Volya is literally wiling for his dad to kill him if it means Sieger dies too.

Ont he way to the bar after Y’all’d’ve is like ‘uh guys i don’t think we should let him help cuz he wants to die and that is maybe not okay?’ and Al is like ‘we are trying to not get him killed’ and Pava’s like ‘yeah he is not in good shape’ but they go out bar hopping and Volya takes them to the two bars he was with his mom with on the night she died. Pava asks around to see if anyone remembers her, and att he first one he doesn’t get much luck but the second one he does, getting some information on the last person to see Therese alive. One of her friends stayed behind at the bar to have some fun with t he barkeep and he was like ‘it was amazing holy shit’ and talked that rich lady up. pussy game strong. The one Therese left with was younger, thick makeup, odd accent.

Al tapped out for a bit to go back and talk to her contact the bluter to see if he can contact both the Medvedva butler as well as the Medvedev maids to be like ‘hey, I want some info and I’ll make sure nothing comes back to you’. She joins back up at bar 3 and that’s when Y’all’d’ve makes his move.

He slides up to Volya and is like ‘hey there my dude, you seem to want to die’ and Volya is like ‘PsssSSSShhh’ and Y’all is like ‘I don’t think it’s cool to let your dad beat you to death when you kinda don’t act like you’d come back for a resurection spell’ and they walk and talk for a bit while Pava and Al follow behin (Al sneaking, Pava just walking)

Volya admits that shit is bad, and Y’all agrees. The world is fucking awful, and horrible things happen, and they keep happening, and they don’t stop. And Volya mentions that his brother left, his sister left (Me, as Vera: OW) and his mom ‘left’, goingout by getting Sieger arrested wouldn’t be a bad way to go out himself. And there’s his dad’s new wife and the kid she’s going to have, they’re going to get treated just the same. Y’all is like ‘it’s good to want to make things better, but like, shit don’t get better when you die. it just stops getting at all’.

They stop by the canal and Al and Pava are like ‘oh my god are they going to jump in’ after they’re like ‘shit, it’s easy to forget he’s been alive a long time’. Kid elf he may be, he’s older than all three of them combined. Volya seems to back from the cliff a bit, but Y’all’d’ve sees something sparkly in the water and, true to form, is like ‘Excuse me, I’m aware that this is a serious conversation but there’s something shiny, gotta get it.” and in he goes, failing his swim check remarklably and freaking out both Al and Pava.

Al grabs Volya and he’s like OH SCORE and Al’s like ‘Get Y’all’d’ve!’ and Pava’s like ‘My girl, I can’t swim.’ and Al is like ‘ffs you get HIM then’ and shoves Volya at him and Volya’s like ‘SCORE’ and Al goes over to check on Y’alld’ve.

Y’all’dve finds the shiny thing and pops up and is like ‘hey. saw a shiny. got it.’ and Al is like ‘you are a horrible fucking gremlin’ and Pava and Volya are like ‘AWESOME JOB’. He brings it up and it’s Therese’ missing necklace, but it’s broken.

Al and Pava (And Volya) seem to think that Therese killed herself, and Y’all’d’ve is in camp ‘why the fuck this neckacle broke tho’. At one point in the night Al and Pava have a conversation about if Volya swings both ways or not. Al heads home with Volya in tow to let him sleep it off with the old ladies and talks to Ethel and has her hide the necklace Y’all’d’ve found because she does not want any of this to come back on him. Ethel is like ‘do you fucking know who that is that is the medvedev heir’ and Al is like ‘i am aware we’re trying to get his father also his granny is great’ and Ethel is like ‘bitch what’ because apparently Ethel does _not_ like dame vera.

The next morning They take watch to the park and to distract Y’all’dve Al tells him to look somewhere, and he’s like ‘there’s nothing over th- is that a squirel’ and runs over to climb a tree and catch a squirel. Al and Pava talk about serious shit for a bit while Y’all’d’ve catches a squirrel. He’s like ‘I DON’T WANT IT ANYMORE’ and throws it at Watch, who catches it in one hand. Horrified, Y’all is like ‘please take that to al’ and as Pava and Al finish their conversation he lumbers over and holds out his hand to Al, opening it to reveal a terrified squirel who promptly bolts.

At the guard tower the QC is pissed because douchebag Sieger has sent a letter being like ‘HEY HOW BOUT YOU FUCKS BE PROFESSIONAL’ and Al and the QC have another chat where Al _almost_ tells her that Y’all’d’ve found the necklace but instead is like I WAS IN THE THIEVES GUILD THE TOHER TWO HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH IT and the QC is actually impressed she admitted that, but through other clues she’s given (Like admitting to the QC that she knew the necklace Sieger said wass on the body wasn’t there because we were the idiots who found it) that Al stole th rings off of Therese’ corpse.

Y’alld’ve and Pava go to escort Volya home and are like ‘Okay, don’t start shit’ and Volya’s like ‘Okay’ and in he goes to promptly start shit. They hear  yelling and Volya opens the blinds a bit. Then things calm down and Y’all’d’ve and Pava are like ‘I got no where else to be’ so they wait. Volya comes out shellshocked. He yelled at his father, accused him of killing his mother, accused him of killing his first wife, came out as gay, and his dad didn’t give a shit. Didn’t yell at him. Didn’t hit him. Was like ‘I don’t care’.

Y’alld’ve and Pava: oh my god he’s going to fucking murder you.

They refuse to let him go back in the house and they walk him to Grandmama’s before heading back to the station to tell Al about this development. The QC drops a hint that she thinks that Al should return the ring to sieger for the reward money and to also be like ‘hey, asshole, look what the fuck I found’ and Y’all’d’ve is like -squinty eyes- because he suspects something’s up, but they distract him with gold to count. He makes it into shapes when he forgets he’s supposed to be counting it.

They head to Therese’ friend, the one who fucked the barman, and they get her account of the night. She gives them a bit of info on the girl that Therse left with. Her name was Peach, she wore thick makeup and out of style clothes and had an accent, but it sounded like she was trying to hide it. after Pava told her about hte barman’s compliments and she was like ‘he was so appreciative, he made me feel so wanted’ and Pava wingmaned hard for him she was like ‘oh, no, her name was Plum’. They talk with Therese’ other friend that sieger had told them about but she doesn’t have much to tell them, but both women say that Sieger’s people had been there to talk to them.

So the team heads back to the Medvedev residence and ask to talk to his fiance, and Sieger isn’t too happy. Howver, team asshole is on best behavior. Al’s brought her own quill and parchment, Y’all’dve is sitting and not perching on the (new) couch, Pava’s standing up straight. They talk with the future lady medvedev, who is from rusk and has an accent and the team is like HMMMM MMM INTERESTING. And Tatiana admits she was bar hopping and trying to network and did run in with Therese and how awufl she feels because the poor woman died that night. Al and Pava are like ‘oh you poor thing, it’s all right, she just had an accident’ and Tatiana shakes at that. The group is like ‘oh shit she knows something’ but they don’t say anything because Sieger is right fucking there.

Back at the guard tower the QC is like ‘you asshole need to finish this up because I’m losing squad one tomorrow you’re going to need to get interns.’ an Y’all’d’ve is like ‘hey, can I not get the elves? They don’t like me, I’m not elfy enough fro them’ and Pava’s like ‘WE GOTTA KICK THOSE ELVES OFF THE SQUAD THEY MAKE HIM FEEL BAD ABOUT HIMSELF’

[mihanada]

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/Modao Zushi Audio Drama

Episode 1

Finally got around to doing this! Now I can’t wait for the animation...

Episode 1

I really love the change to the introduction to a normal family scene. It displays just how pervasive Wei Wuxian’s reputation as the Yiling Patriarch was that he even became a household name. Leading into it through the Sunshot Campaign game and incorporating the rest of the information in the prologue through the dialogue was also a nice touch. It’s the little things that make a fictional world feel real.

Poor Jiang Cheng, even random people call you by your birth name, not your courtesy name lol (I laughed at this, though it might be an unintentional oversight...or could be an intentional one, else it might confuse the reader because Wei Wuxian always refers to him with his birth name).

Both the manhua and audio drama give Mo Xuanyu some speaking lines for the summoning ritual, which I really appreciate. It wasn’t possible in the novel since the whole thing (aside from the prologue) is supposed to be from Wei Wuxian’s point of view. In the audio drama, he has that whole...desperation/determination and dark, evil ritual vibe going on which is fittingly dramatic.

The added dialogue throughout these episodes is also a nice touch for this type of adaptation. Mo Ziyuan gets to come off as even meaner than before! Yay!

But hey, he mentions the summoning array in this, which I actually joked about in my live blog (about how he doesn’t mention the...bloody mess on the floor, granted he’s used to Mo Xuanyu doing “weird” things but even so I would wonder why there’s blood all over the damn place).

Ah! Also! The audio drama gives a date to Mo Xuanyu’s time in the Jin Sect! Granted, this can only true of the audio drama, but still. It’s nice to have some more information.

:3 wei wuxian’s little ‘o-oh’ before he looks at himself in the mirror and gets freaked out.

audio drama mo xuanyu also apparently paints his nails. nice to know.

Mo Xuanyu’s notes about his life! Voiced by himself! The despair in his voice is a nice touch. I’ve always felt bad for the guy, this doesn’t help lol. Ah, but in the novel it was a diary that Wei Wuxian found, I think, and in this version he finds a note specifically saying he was summoned to get revenge on Mo Xuanyu’s behalf. Interesting change.

lol my Chinese language comprehension is almost nonexistent and piss-poor in the stuff I did learn, but I do like the way Wei Wuxian delivers some of his lines, mostly his complaining ‘ugh you’ve got the wrong guy for this job’.

oh no the playful music starts right after he finds out everyone considers him a lunatic xD

HA then he just steals the food the servants were carrying. ‘this is for me?? thanks!!”

I mean, him acting like a lunatic make for some great comedy moments in the beginning of the story. More is always good.

ahaha, his ‘gotta live up to my name as a sinister ghoul’. that does sound like a very wei wuxian thing to say doesn’t it

the music building as Wei Wuxian pops out of the crowd! haha, the timing of hte soundtrack is great

hehehe the Lan kids...so precious as always

lol it’s great getting to hear the parts where Wei Wuxian’s fake crying that they’re bullying/beating him up. gotta appeal to the Lan kids’ sense of righteousness, right? (the translator’s little ;_; face in that line is a cute touch xD)

HAHAHA I just noticed this: Madam Mo says “he’s your cousin!” if only Wei Wuxian knew...as if that stopped Mo Xuanyu before l o l.

I will never not laugh at his “I still want to find a good man!” lines. don’t you worry, you will.

Wei Wuxian goes from having fun to fake crying in like, a few sentences I can’t tell if his acting is good or really bad

poor Lan kids though. they did not sign up to get in the middle of a family feud. 

ahhh all of Wei Wuxian’s ‘shameless comments’ the additions to the novel lines are such gold.

Madam Mo’s grief is nicely done. not too ear screech-y and appropriately sad.

lovely gross sound effects. don’t expect these to go away lol. this is a rather gory novel if you think about it.

huh. the hand is. leaping around. it wasn’t very clear in the novel, though you knew it detached itself.

also, the added dialogue of the Lan kids working together to try to suppress the hand is nice. unnecessary in a novel, but good for other mediums.

always thought it was interesting how he wakes up the fierce corpses. it seems to have to do with sound.

and Hanguang-jun is here! no clue if that’s a guqin or they’re just using some other instrument (as is often done in shows and stuff), but it’s a perfect instrument for someone like Lan Wangji, you know?

And we end it with Wei Wuxian thinking ‘Lan Zhan!’

[popculturebuffet]

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1990 Review: Still Possesses Turtle Power After All These Years

Cowabunga all you happy people! I freaking love the Teenage Ninja Turtles. I grew up with it from Turtles in Time, which was my first video game, to the 2003 cartoon, which I covered the first three episodes of last month, and on to present day as I re-read the idw comics after finally reading the original eastman and laird run of mirage, and impatiently waiting for Shredder’s Revenge to come out after a LONG drout of no good TMNT games. I”m a fan of these heroes four, their dynamic as a family, the endless possiblities that come from it’s long history and ablitlity to go anywhere in any genre, and the wonderful goofy shit that happens when you have a franchise about mutant turtles learning ninjitsu from a rat and fighting a dude covered in knife covered samurai armor. 

So with me finally covering the guys after almost a year last month and with a new movie set to debut at some point this year, I had the bright idea to revisit the FIRST TMNT movie after way too many years of not watching it. This movie is anear and dear to my heart: When I first started getting into the boys big as a kid with the 2003 cartoon, I badly wanted more turtles. But back then it wasn’t nearly as easy to glom onto some more of the sewer shock pizza kings: Streaming sites with all the cartoons on them weren’t all that accesable, dvd’s were expensive for the 87 cartoon, Mirage wasn’t reprinting the comics in any meaningful way and my local comic shop didn’t have any at all and I could only play the SNES when my brother had it set up on occasion like at our Grandma’s farm. 

As you probably guessed though there was one exception: the original 1990 movie, which I got at Walmart for 5 bucks and haven’t let go of since. It was one of my first dvds and is still one of my most precious. Said film hit the spot just right as like my beloved 2003 series, it was a mildly goofy but still fucking cool adaptation that stuck closer to the mirage comics, even more than the 2003 series would, while taking a few queues from the 87 series. This film is as precious to me as the 2003 series and a with a brand new movie coming up, I figured it was the exact right time to dig into this classic: what makes it still good to this day, what’s fun to point and laugh at, and how the heck Jim Henson got involved in this. So join me under the cut as I take a look at my boys first theatrical outing and why I still love watching a turtle. 

No One Wanted To Make This: Before we get into the film itself some background. As usual I struggled a bit, but thankfully found some help in the form of this Hollywood Reporter article.  It’s a fascinating read worth your time, providing an oral history of the film from the people who worked on it. 

The film was the baby of Gary Propper, a surfer dude and road manager for the prop comic Gallagher, aka that guy who used to smash watermelons but now has instead opted to smash what little’s left of his career by being a homophobic douchenozzle. He found an ally in Showtime producer Kim Dawson who’d produced Gallagher’s special. I don’t think there will be more of an 80′s sentence than “Gallagher’s surfer dude agent wanted to make a teenage mutant ninja turtles movie”. Propper was a huge fan of the comics, and with Dawson’s help convinced Laird and Eastman to let them option it to studios. 

It may come as a shock to you but the road agent for a homophobic watermelon man and a producer at a niche cable channel wanting to make a movie based on an underground comic book about masked turtles at a time when the two most recent comic book movies were Superman IV: The Quest for Peace and Howard the Duck, did not go well. Every door in Hollywood got slammed in their face, even Fox> Even the eventual backer of the film, Golden Harvest, a hong kong action film studio, took months to convince to actually back the film. 

Things did not get easier from there: The films writer Bobby Herbeck had trouble getting a story agreed on because Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird’s working relationship had deteroiated horribly from the stress so naturally the two could not agree on a damn thing and argued with each other. Peter Laird  made a tense siutation even worse by constnatly sniping at Herbeck and feeling he was a “Hollywood outsider infringing on his vision and characters”

Granted the script was apparently not great... but Pete still comes off as a pretnetious ass who views his weird indie comic as THE HIGHEST OF HIGH CALLINGS HOW DARE YOU SOIL IT. And continued to be kind of a prick like this throughout the rest of his time with the property. 

Thankfully the film found i’ts voice, vision and director in Steve Barron. Barron was a music video guy who knew the producers and while reluctant, eventually dove into the project rightfully thinking the film would need to be a mix of the mirage comics and 87 cartoon, keeping aprils’ reporter job, the turtles lvoe of pizza and their iconic color coding from the cartoon but adapting several stories from the comics as the backbone of the film. The guys liked barron MUCH better and things ran smoother. 

Barron also brought in one of the film’s biggest selling points and it’s most valuable asset: it’s triumphantly awesome Jim Henson costumes. Barron had worked with good old Jim on the music videos for Labyrinth, and while it took some convincing since the comics were violent as hell and that wasn’t Jim’s style, Barron eventually got him on board. This naturally doubled the budget, but given Henson’s costumes STILL hold up today and look better than the cgi used in the platinum dunes films... it was a good call. And this was brand new tech for jim, having to invent tons of new ideas and mechanisms just to make the things work, and said things still were absolute hell on the actors. Jim later ended up not liking the film for being too violent... which I find hilarious given how many muppets got eaten or blowed up real good on his show but regardless, I thank this legendary and wonderful man as without him this film WOULD NOT have worked. The costumes here look great, feel realistic, and you can’t tell the actors were dubbed much less horribly suffering in those suits. Much like Disney Land. 

The film would get picked up for distribution by New Line, and despite i’ts weird as hell origins and the long shot it had.. the film was a MASSIVE hit at the box office, owing to a combination of Batman 89 the previous year having proved comic book movies can work for audiences, the cartoon’s runaway sucess, and a massive marketing campaign. The film made it’s mark. So now we know how we got here let’s get into the film itself. 

What’s the Story Morning Glory?:

So the story for this one is largely cobbled together from some of the more notable arcs Eastman and Laird did before handing off the book to others full time as the stress of the company and the mounting tension with each other made it near impossible to work together on the book itself. 

To Save time i’m just going through what hte movie takes from the comics plot wise now to save me the trouble later:The movie takes elements from the first issue (The Turtles, Splinter and Shredder’s backstories, Shredder being fully human and the main antagonist, Shredder’s design and the final rooftop showdown that results in Shredder’s death), second and third, (April’s apartment over her dad’s old store and the turtles moving in when their home is ransacked and splinter has gone missing), the rapheal micro series (A tounge in cheek way of cashing in on the Mini-Series craze of the 80s, a one shot by modern standards and something that’s tragically been underused as an idea as only TMNT and MLP have used the idea at IDW, Raph meeting casey and their fight with one another), the return of shredder arc (One of the turtles being ambushed and mobbed by the foot and then thrown though a sky light (Leo in the comic and Raph here), the turtles being horribly outnumbered by them, Casey coming ot the rescue and metting the non-raph turtles for the first time, and them being forced to escape when the place goes up in flames), their exile to northampton (April writing in a journal, casey working on a car with one of the guys and one of hte guys looking over hteir injured brother), and finally, their triumphant return which was very loosely adapted as there are no deformed shredder clones and shredder not being dead yet in this version was not brought back by a colony of super science worms. 

So as for how this all comes together: Our story takes place in New York: A crimewave is high with muggings mysterious. There are a ton of phantom thefts going around and at most people have been seeing teens responsibile. And the police.. are at about this level of useful:

The only person doing something is April O’Neil, played by Judith Hoag. Hoag is easily the standout of the film, giving us a strong, confident woman with a wonderful sense of humor. She honestly might be my faviorite April O Neil, and given we’ve had some great ones with 2003, 2012 and Rise, that’s not something I say lightly. I honestly wish I’d recognized her in more stuff as she was both on Nashville and the mom in the Halloween Town films, and most recently was on the ScFy show the magicians. She’s a talented lady and i’m glad she’s still goin. 

April is a reporter for Channel 3 like the cartoon, though for some weird reason her boss from the cartoon is replaced by Charles Pennigton, played by Jay Patterson, whose currently dealing with his troubled son Danny, played by Micheal Turney. Pennington is horribly useless at both jobs: At work he tries to ease April off calling out Chief Sterns, who refuses to listen to April’s evidence gathered from japanese immigrants that the crimes resemble similar ones in japan in favor of trying to get charles to shut her up. Danny meanwhile is a member of the foot becase his dad thinks shouting out him and talking about him like he’s not there and generally being a dipstick will actually do anything to help him. 

I love the concept for the foot here. In addition to being a Ninja Violence Gang as always, they now recruit new members by finding kids without families or with troubled family lives and giving them a sense of family with the foot, and sweeting the bargin with a giant cave filled with arcade machines, a skate ramp and general late 80′s early 90′s kids goodies. Is it rediculous? Yes. Is it also clever as it gives Shredder an easy army of plausably deniable theives that he can pick the best out of to put in his elite that will be tirelessly loyal to him and him alone? Also yes. 

So April being public about this stuff gets her attacked, which naturally leads to our heroes coming in, first in the shadows and later directly when April wont’ give up on the case and Shredder sends some ninjas to go shut her up.. which he does weirdly as the guy jsut slaps her and tells her to cut it out like he’s on a domestically abusive episode of Full House. Raph saves her, and we get the turtles origin.. though weirdly they cut it in half. We get the ooze portion but Splinter’s past with Saki, Saki’s murder of his master and his master’s partern Tang Shen is left for later in the film and the fact Shredder’s saki is treated as a big twist despite the fact the biggest audience for the film would be kids... and kids would’ve been familiar with the cartoon where the giant brain monster routinely screeches out saki at the shredder. Maybe Barron just thought he was an alcoholic I don’t know. It just would’ve made more sense to have it all at once and let the audeince put it together. 

April becomes good friends with the turtles over a night of frozen pizza and camradrie, but the Splinters return home to find it ransacked, Splinter kidnapped by the foot, and are forced to Stay with april. Charles meanwhile tries to get April to backoff because he made a deal with the police to clear Danny’s record, without TELLING her any of this mind you, but I will save my rage on that little plot point for in a bit as Danny who he drug along sees the turtles and tells the Shredder. 

So we get the return of the shredder arc as Raph goes through a window, our heroes fight valiantly, and Raph’s friend Casey who he met earlier shows up, the two having bonded as all true friends do.. by beating the shit out of each other ending with raph shouting DAMNNNNNNN really big and dramatically into the sky for some reason. The Turtles and friends escape with an injured raph from April’s burning second hand store. She had a second hand store it was poorly established and only there because she had it in the comics. 

Our heroes retreat to a farm April’s grandma owned in Northampton, Massachutes, where Mirage was located at the time the original comics where they were exiled to the place were written and a location that has been a staple of the turtles ever since. The turtles slowly recover, lick their wounds, talk about who hooked up with who on gilligans island etc, before Leo connects with Splinter via meditation, who tells them to come back. Splinter also starts to connect with Danny and convinces him to swtich sides.. or at the very least squat in the boys old home. 

The boys return home, find danny, and prepare, Danny goes back and ends up giving away the Turtles are home.. but the turtles are ready and in an awesome sequence kick the fuck out of the foot squad sent for them with some well prepared steam vents. Casey goes to get splinter since Danny told them and with Danny’s help, finds him, since Danny found out they were gonna kill him. Casey beats up Tatsu, shredder’s right hand man, and they get him out. 

We get our final fight which is awesome up until the climax.. which is splinter casually tripping shredder with nunchucks and thier bloody history being kind of rushed and unsatsifying. Casey crushes shredder with a garbage truck, April gets her job back, more on that in a moment, she and casey hook up, and we end with the fucking awesome song T-U-R-T-L-E Power by partners in cryme. Seriously check it out it’s fucking triumphant. 

The song is just good.. cheesy? Sure but that’s half the fun. It’s the gold standard for movie theme songs for them and stacks up handily with the various animated series themes.. all of which slap. Okay... ALMOST all of which slap. Fast Forwards is aggressively medicore, which is doubly suprising to me since 4kids was REALLY damn good with theme songs. It was one of the three things they were best at along with finding VERY talented voice actors and setting japan based works in america because merica dammit.  

The plot is very solid: It skilfully packed half of eastman and laird’s run on TMNT into 90 mintues while adding things like April’s job at channel 9, the way the foot recurited kids etc. The plot flows well for hte most part and apart from one annoying subplot we’ll get to never has a moment that feel unecessary or dosen’t pay off later. And the stellar plot and fun pacing of it helps boilster the characters that do work... and help paper over the ones that are so thin the’yd fall down a grate...

Our Heroes, Villains and Annoying Middle Aged Guys:

Yeahhhh character is hit and miss here. Some are rather strong, others are the bare basics for the character their adapting and most are just to serve the plot but some work some don’t,  So let’s talk about it starting with our boys:

Raph is the most fleshed out of the turtles, being the main focus of the first 2/3 of the film, and having his anger be part of what SHOULD be a character arc, learning to temper it. And while granted MOST TMNT properties do this, to the point that Rise Raph is so loveable in part because his boisterous bruiser big bro attitude is a refreshing break from the usual grumpus we get. But at the time this hadn’t been done in every version but the 87 cartoon, so exploring it was valid.. but despite saying this should be a thing htey just forget about it and the most plot relevance he gets is going thorugh a window. He dosen’t really get a resolution.. his arc just kind of stops dead for the final half and it’s one of the film’s weaker points, one I only just now noticed on this rewatch. He’s still the most entertaining. 

Leo is the weakest of the turtles. He really lacks a personality here mostly just being leader and while his spirtual side is touched on, it’s  mostly a plot device. He’s just kinda the leader because he was in the comics to the point Partners in Cryme called Raph the leader. His role in getting taken out by the foot was taken by Raph, so he just has.. nothing to do for most of the film other than gripe at raph ocasionally and say orders. He’s probably the worst Leo i’ve seen outside of Next Mutation. I prefice that because after watching Phelous’ review it’s VERY clear those four are the worst versions of the characters, and no personality is still better than either having your team do nothing or yelling at them as your personality. I chalk this up to the Mirage Leo, and the mirage turtles to a poit being kind of bland. Not TERRIBLE characters, especially for the time, but not nearly as fleshed out or individualized as they woudl be in other adpatations, and with most traits LEo DID have, like his badassery flat out gone, he’s just.. nothing here. 

Mikey and Donnie are a double act here with both sharing a brain. Interestingly instead of his normal genius character, Donnie is Mikey’s best friend and the two simply trade jokes and schtick together. The two are interchangable.. but easily the best part of the film and a lot of the most memorable gags and lines, from Ninja Kick the Damn Rabbit! to “Do you like Penicllin on your pizza”, are from them. Thier there almost entirely as comic relief but it works, with both clealry being more modled ont he 87 cartoon turtles, a move that helps lighten the mood in darker moments. Their just genuinely charming and it’s intresting to see such a diffrent version of Donnie, and other incarnations, specifically the 2003 and Rise versions, would retain the sarcastic edge. 

Splinter is splinter. That’s about it, he’s peformed well and the puppet is amazing but he gets kidnapped a half an hour in and outside of influcencing Denny, more on that in a moment, and finishing Shredder he dosen’t do much but spout exposition. He’s not bad or anything, but he’s essentially a rodent shaped plot device. He was also puppeted by Kevin CLash, aka the guy who does Elmo. So there you go. 

April on the other hand.. is truly excellent. This might be my faviorite April. Judith’s april nicely blends the cartoon and mirage versions: She has the cartoons energy and job, but the comics sheer will and casual nature. Judith just oozes personality and her April is just a joy to watch, from her breezy chemistry filled interactions with the guys to her confrntation with Chief Sterns, knowing she’ll get thrown out by the asshole. She’s confident, and even when afraid dosen’t back down to her attackers and even helps out during the sewer ambush. I mean it’s a pot on the head but still it’s neat. She’s easily the best part of the flim and the most fleshed out of the cast. The worst I can say is they kinda shove her store from the comics, Second Time Around, in there for no other reason than it was in the comics: It dosen’t come up until it’s needed for the foot’s assault on her place. But overall.. she’s just fantastic to watch. 

Speaking of fantastic to watch, Elias Koteas is fantastic as Casey. Seriously he’s only second to the 2003 version in my eyes, getting the concept of a testorone filled average guy who decided to just go out and hit people with sports equipment after watching too much A-Team.. I mean that part of it’s not in this version but it’s implied, just right. Like judith, Elias is just really funny to watch and his big scenes, showing up just in time during the foot assault on april’s place and his fight with Tatsu are some of the best parts of the film, the former taken directly from the comics. This version isn’t without problems: His friendship with Raph, his most endearing aspect and one that has been carried throughout eveyr version Casey’s important, with the only exception so far being rise and we have a movie to fix that, is absent here. HE does save the guy, but they don’t really bond or anything. In fact he disappears for about half an hour after his big fight with Raph. But... again he’s just so damn entertaining, down to his JOSEEEEEEEEEEE Conseco bats (There was a two for one sale!).

Shredder is just a LITTLE better than splinter, if only because his actor projects a true aura of menace and I feel this version had some influence on the pants crappingly terrifying 2003 version. And the idea of the foot recurting teenagers like I said is a good one: He gives them home and a cause, they give him plausably deniable backup. And his fight with the boys in the climax is really awesome... the conclusion sucks but otherwise h’es okay. Not the deepest villian, but he has enough presence to be enjoyable.

His right hand man Tatsu, whose been adapted ocasionally since this and reimaigned as Natsu in the IDW comics, a female version, is also fine. He’s your standard grimacing goon but has enough presence to work. 

So that brings us to the penningtons. Charles, april’s boss at the station and his son Danny who’s joined the foot as he feels his dad dosen’t love him. Charles..is about as interesting and likeable as a dog turd and is the worst aspect of the film. No debate there, he just sucks. He sucks so hard he’s classified as a black hole.  The film wants you to see him as a put upon wokring dad whose frustrated with his son’s increased moodiness, skipping school and crminal undertakings and just wants to help him and loves him deep down. The problem is his actor’s delivery instead of concerned.. is just pissed. He just seems pissy and upset about the whole thing and comes off like he’s only mad about Danny doing this because he’s embarassing him and not because you know, it’s bad. When confronting Danny about stealing, he dosen’t consider MAYBE he’s part of a gang or needs help, but just wonders “Why are you stealing when I give you stuff”. Because, Dipshit, sometimes kids do crimes not because they need the stuff but because they WANT to, and because they want to act the fuck out. 

The most he does for the kid is agree to try and get April to back off the police when Cheif Sterns offers to let Danny go and not put him on record in exchange for it. The problem.. is this makes him even MORE unsympathetic. While I do get wanting to help your child, I do and it’s a sucky position... he again should be sympathetic.. but he handles the thing so badly it sucks. He just tells april to ease off, with no reason given, then fires her when she SHOCKINGLY dosen’t give up taking the guy whose refusing to take her hard work seriously or actually solve the crime wave problem to task for his shitty behavior as ANY person facing a shitty, corrput cop would. She just wants to hold him acountable and get him to actually do something. He clearly knows her on a personal level too as he talks about his issues with his son freely with her, something you don’t do with an employee unless their also a friend on some level. 

He could have TOLD april what was going on. She’d be furious at Stern’s naked corrpution and prioritizing shutting her up over actually solving crimes.. and thus put at least some of that energy into shutting him down or finding a way around it, going to the papers or something like that. Even in 1990 pre-internet, there were ways to get around Sterns blackmail and expose him so someone who’d actually do the job could get the job. Instead he just comes off as a selfish coward who rather than try and fight the guy blatantly abusing his power and using Charles own son as  barganing chip, goes along with it because it’s the easier option to simply bow to him instead of TRY and stop this. And it’s not like he’s even going after a beloved public figure or someone who could hide behind his rep: Sterns was blatantly failing a crime wave, April had called him out on his failrues and coverups multiple times. The public was against sterns.. finding out he tried to blackmail the media into shutting up about him would PROBABLY end him... I only say probably not because the public wouldn’t skewer him, but because police tend to escape consequences for blatantly murdering someone on a daily basis and Andrew Cumo is STILl mayor over in new york, the same city this movie takes place, 31 years later, depsite EVERYONE asking him to resign over a long history of sexual harassment and a more recent but still horrible history of hiding death numbers. I don’t doubt people being stupid enough to ignore this or the bilaws with cops being stacked enough for him to get away with it, but just because someone gets away with a crime dosen’t mean you shoudln’t try and go after them in the first place. Fuck. Charles. Pennington. 

Danny on the other hand is FAR more interesting and I think gets way too much flack when it comes to this subplot. Unlike his dad, whose dead weight, Danny is intresting: He provides a POV character for the foot’s MO in the film of taking in wayward teens, and his character arc is pretty engaging, slowly realizing the foot dosen’t care and that hte turtles are the good guys. HIs actor does a great job and while not the biggest presence, he’s not a bad addition to clan hamaoto and I wish other adaptations would find a way to use him. The pull between doing the right thing and his found family is a good struggle. My only real issue with his plot is the moviies flawed aseop about family. It tries to contrast shredder and his using the kids blatnatly with Splinter and Charles really loving their sons. And it works with Splinter and the kids because despite being a tad strict, Splinter clearly loves his sons and works with them to help them. The problem is ENTIRELY with Charles and Danny. As I said Charles love comes off as transasctional: He either thinks he can buy it or just expects it because he shot a bunch of goop into Danny’s mom after two minutes of disapointment. It dosen’t work with them because neither option is good for Danny. His father is neglectful, chooses throwing his jounralistic integrity out the window over talking to his son or his best friend about another way, and abrasive. Danny is no saint, he does do crimes, but it’s clearly a result of a shitty upbringing and the shredder and co actually offeirng him the love he desperatly craves. Danny goes to the foot because his dad is bad at his job but the film never adresses that and just expects Danny to go back to his dad because the plot says so. Danny would HONESTLY be better off with Splinter. No really. Sure he’d have to live in the sewers.. but he did so for a few weeks in the course of the movie. He’s fine down there. Splitner actually cares about him and took an intrest to him and knows how to raise a child. Let him become the fifth turtle. An aseop about family is not a bad thing: Loaded subject that it can be given how many outright abusive families exist, i’m one of the lucky ones who dosen’t have that issue, family is an important thing and can be a source of comfort and support. But this film tells you you should love and respect someone who does not love, respect or value you because he spent a minute in your mom’s vagina and that’s not how family should work and is outright dangerous to kids in an abusive situation. Love the film otherwise but fuck this aseop skyhigh. 

Final thoughts:

Overall though.. the film is bodacious. It’s funny, well paced, has an awesome cast, and outside of a certain bald asswipe... it’s a really good superhero film. Is it the best i’ve seen? Nope. Not even close and character wise most of them are as thin as a wet paper bag covered in ranch dressing. But it’s still a fun as hell with awesome corepgraphy, a killer soundtrack, seriously the soundtrack is damn excellent and only didn’t get it’s own section because I didn’t have enough to say and some of the best effects work i’ve seen in a film in the turtle suits. If you haven’t seen it I urge you to check it out: it’s a breezy 90 minutes, it’s on hbo max and it’s a shell of a time. Will I do the next film? 

We’ll see how this one does like wise and such, but I will be doing the rise film whenever it comes out this year. So look for that and keep possesing turtle power my dudes. If you liked this review subscirbe for more, join my patreon to keep this blog a chugging, comission a review if you have more turtle stuff you want me to cover, and comment on this. What do you think of the movie, what are your thoughts on the review, what can I do better, what other turtle stuff would you like me to cover/ Let me know and i’ll see you at hte next rainbow. 

[kimmysfandomblog]

for the ask game, undertale/deltarune?

Thank you, Anon!!! >uO

I did Undertale, so I’ll talk about Deltarune!

the character i least understand: Considering that the full game hasn’t even been released yet, once it does, it will be something different. For now, I think that the main character, Kris, is the most mysterious. I theorize Kris is just Chara’s real name, but we’ll see what happens! The things we know is that Kris is younger than Asriel and they (?) are typical younger sibling- out-performed by the older sibling and feeling isolated. At least so far, Kris seems more compassionate than angry? But that could change, who knows!

interactions i enjoyed the most: The Dark Fun Gang XD (Name can change depending on how you choose the name, but I chose Ralsei’s paper, so Dark Fun Gang it is lol) Lancer and Suzie’s friendship was great, they really learn from each other (and that is the type of relationship I love most- where the people involved learn and grow from each other through interacting!)

the character who scares me the most: Jevil :( He’s a pain to beat, but I know he isn’t really harder than the two Genocide Route fights, or even Flowey really. (but at least with Flowey, you can still progress even if you die). I wonder why he is locked up, or what happened to make him different? He kind of implies that if you lose hte battle against him, he’ll kill everyone in his path.

the character who is mostly like me: Maybe Noelle? Get’s stuck with the smart ones or something? Kinda shy but only when cornered about it? Maybe Ralsei is better, since He is the shy type, but can still kind of lead, gets flustered with physical contact, and wishes we could solve every problem without a hint of violence. Also not too careful about our own opinions, which can negatively impact someone.

hottest looks character: No answer?? I guess that Roulx Kaard woul be the only one appropriate, but I don’t really have much opinion on the guy besides he is silly.

one thing i dislike about my fave character: Ralsei is a good boy, and I don’t like that just because of his design, people think he is a girl. Ralsei can look pretty and cute and still be a boy.

one thing i like about my hated character: I don’t really know if I hate anyone. I mean, there’s the King, but we don’t know what he and the Knight talked about to make him so against Lightners? I think it could be possible he is redeemable, and that’s about all I can say about him?

a quote or scene that haunts me: Unlike Undertale, everything is Pacifist. You can’t kill anyone, so there are no serious negative impacts like in Undertale. Like, even with Undertale, if you do things a certain way, killing Toriel can be nightmarish. Hmm, but for Deltarune, the one scary part is the ending of th chapter ending in Kris taking out their own Soul. I theorize Kris and Chara are the same, and what that sscene was was actually a nightmare, or will appear to be a nightmare. Kris will not think anything mor on it because they won’t see their soul in the cage, but later it is revealed true, or something.

a death that left me indifferent: There were no deaths in this game, but Gerson’s already dead. I guess the Amalgamates being dead makes me sad but not as sad as Gerson’s?

a character i wish died but didn’t: I guess... we’ll see whoever this Knight is (and if my theory is corect and the Knigh is Chara/Kris, that will be someting to think about.)

my ship that never sailed: Alphyne is not yet sailed, but I hope that in later chapters it will XD Everyone mad about Alphyne not being canon, they should consider that this is an Alternate Universe, and since Alphys is a teacher instead of head scientists, and Undyne already says she leaves school decisions to the School Board, we can’t expect them to have already met.It’lll happen, likely in later parts of the game. Just like Mattaton not being Mettaton right now because Alphys isn’t creating a robot body, or no friendship between Undyne and Papyrus just yet because Papyrus and Sans just moved in. Oh, but the one thing I don’t understand is why Toriel and Asgore are separated/divorced (and why Asgore isn’t mayor?). I mean, from my understanding, Asgore and Toriel were fine until he suggested killing humans and harvesting their souls to destroy all other humans.

[attina-the-responsible]

JEFF Triton -- Character Sheet

Archetype — The Ruler Birthday — April 25, 1967 Zodiac Sign — Taurus MBTI — ISTJ Enneagram — 6; the Loyalist Temperament — Melancholy Hogwarts House — Huffleclaw (with a Slyth model) Moral Alignment — Lawful Good Primary Vice — Pride Primary Virtue — Diligence Element — Earth

Overview:

Mother — JODY Triton (nee Poole) Father — Cyrus Triton Mother’s Occupation — homemaker? Father’s Occupation — mer-government? Family Finances — uh all mermaids are rich are mermaids a communist dictatorshiP? Birth Order — Oldest Brothers —  None Sisters — JEAN, JUNE, JULY, JANE, JILL, JADE Other Close Family — Octopian, Trent -- brothers in law; Jewel, Jasmine, Jetta, Jem, Jennite, Jasperine, Julia -- nieces; Jordan -- nephew; Athena’s family. Best Friend — Sebastian and Scuttle Other Friends — Mufasa, The Prince ??, Benjamin Enemies — uh humans? lmao Pets — nah fam. Home Life During Childhood — More introverted but still friendly, didn’t get in much trouble (Athena was the #rebel). Kind of a nerd, his sisters’ deaths made him stoic. He loved them a lot and was kind of the peacemaker of them. Liked to explore, spent time collecting things/cleaning. Loved the environment.   Town or City Name(s) — Boscombe Reef off the coast of Bournemouth; Swynlake, England What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — it was under the ocean?? do they live in caves?? do they have infrastructure? do mermaids sleep in dens do they have "blankets" (makes no sense) and mirrors and toys??? BUT UH pretty clean and neat?? like if he did have toys and, sure, he had toys, they were always put away. Any Sports or Clubs — mer-debate, mer-student council, stuff like that Favorite Toy or Game — mer-chess, mer-monopoly (and the regular versions) Schooling — fish school? HAHA get it? puns. Favorite Subject — history but also really liked science and finds it v applicable to his job Popular or Loner — was very friendly and had friends, but they were mostly “school” friends. liked to be rather solitary, but lots of people liked him. Important Experiences or Events — his sisters’ deaths, moving to land, marrying/meeting athena, athena’s death, his daughters’ births Nationality — er English? I guess? Culture — Merculture Religion and beliefs — Merreligion  

Physical Appearance:

Face Claim —  Sean Bean Complexion — had acne and has scars, but otherwise dark, tan, leathery skin and kinda red sometimes Hair Colour — Copper-y brown/red but going grey Eye Colour — Blue Height — 5’10 Build — Stocky and powerful Tattoos — a whale across his chest, multiple smaller ones--probably all the girls’ birthdays somewhere listed under a fancy letter “A” Piercings — had a nip piercing, ear piercings -- still wears ear piercings when dressing up Common Hairstyle — on the longer side but nicely groomed--def going grey but still pretty brown/red, beard is super nicely groomed it is his best feature ofc (alana makes him special beard cream) Clothing Style — DAD™ wears cargo pants, sandals and socks, CROCS, hawaiian shirts, etc Mannerisms — strokes beard when thinking, talks with hands, frowns when deep in thought Usual Expression — resting bitch face, but he’s actually so soft

Health:

Overall (do they get sick easily)? — decent, probably gets colds every now and then but overall pretty robust health-wise Physical Ailments — n/a Neurological Conditions — depression, PTSD, anxiety Allergies —  seasonal allergies Grooming Habits — rather good, sometimes falls to the wayside bc depression, but mermaids pride themselves on their appearance, esp concerning their hair Sleeping Habits — insomnia which gets worse the more worried he is. Goes and sits in his office a lot at night. Doesn’t sleep very well at all. It makes him tired. Probably falls asleep watching TV in the evenings Eating Habits — eh, he can forget to eat if he’s busy and is a snack addict. But he always has dinner with the girls when he is home.   Exercise Habits —  not suppppppper active, but he swims which is really good for you, isn’t unhealthy but isnt like JACKED Emotional Stability — about a 7. He’s pretty stable unless the girls are giving him hell or something happens in Swynlake that throws off the sense of safety. Body Temperature — Normalish Sociability — 4-5, pretty average. He has been masquerading as a human for al ong time but sometimes he makes little mistakes and says weird things. Doesn’t really seek out conversation but can hold one very well. Not shy, just quiet. Addictions — uhh coffee probably Drug Use — nah Alcohol Use —  occasionally, likes a good craft beer; RARELY gets drunk

Your Character’s Character:

Bad Habits — indulges with food, dwelling on the past Good Habits — good grooming, good listener, organized, quick learner Best Characteristic — the biggest heart, he cares deeply about his fam and community Worst Characteristic — stubborn, suspicious, anxious Worst Memory — his sisters and athena’s death Best Memory — marrying athena! His daughters’ births! Proud of — his daughters, his company Embarrassed by — his daughters -- benjamin probably lol Driving Style —  too damn cautious, grandma, soccer moms you if the car stops too fast, Safe Driver ™ Strong Points — resilient, strong, detail-oriented, smart, studious, hard worker, meticulous, community-oriented/family-oriented Temperament — stoic, laidback til u piss him off Attitude — cautious, realistic, lil sassy but like subtle Weakness — his fears and anxieties Fears — losing his daughters Phobias — ?? Secrets — he’s a MERMAID Regrets — not being with athena/being able to save his sisters/wife, def relationships w lana and ariel Feels Vulnerable When — when he doesn’t know what is going on, lack of control, when his girls are upset with him Pet Peeves — littering, not being listened to, putting their feet on the dashboard Conflicts — wants his daughters to be independent v wants them to be safe; family versus community: mermaids are community oriented and it is hard for him to not fully be himseLF and not be useful -- would choose fam over community. Motivation — be a good community leader, keep his daughters safe, give back, keep the lake/ocean/community safe and clean, be a good dad Short Term Goals and Hopes — daughters succeed academically, board stuff, community safe Long Term Goals and Hopes — safe and happy for his fam, WANTS GRANDBABIES Sexuality — heteroflexible/demisexual Exercise Routine  — swims p regularly Day or Night Person — wants to be a day person, but his depression/insomnia force him to be a night person Introvert or Extrovert — extroverted introvert Optimist or Pessimist — pessimist with realist leanings

Likes and Styles:

Music — Jimmy Buffet and dad rock, also Jazz Books — biographies! Magazines — nat geo, home improvement magazines, men’s health, takes teen vogue quizzes w the girls Foods — p much likes everything, lots of fish, also likes sweets and junk food Drinks — craft beer, water, coffee Animals — his marine counterpart is a turtle!! But he likes most animals--just not in the house w a bunch of daughters,, Sports — eh not particularly Social Issues — left-leaning on most social issues, but more fiscally conservative. Big running points are always SAFETY SAFETY. Big on environmental stuff Favorite Saying — “if life gives you limes, make margaritas” - Jimmy Buffett Color — Green, like Athena’s eyes /tear Jewelry — wears bracelets, rings, necklaces, mostly hemp and beaded stuff, occasionally metal if Dressing Up Websites — watches TED talks, loves youtube (for animal vids), is that dad that comments on everything on facebooks, decent w the internet bc y’know he runs a company, TV Shows — home improvement, cooking shows, bad reality telly, historical dramas (mad men, house of cards), sitcoms Movies — tbh likes romcoms on the lowkey, hates horror, will watch anything hte girls want (but horror) Greatest Want — keep his family safe, happiness for his girls Greatest Need — learn to let go, safety/security/peace

Where and How Does Your Character Live Now:

Home — lives in the Woods, five bedroom, three floors, mansion Household furnishings — relatively modern but also homey Favorite Possession — his photo albums and his wedding ring Most Cherished Possession — HIS DAUGHTERS!!! Married Before — to the LOVE OF HIS LIFE Athena Significant Other Before — probably one girlfriend Children — Attina, Andrina, Adella, Arista, Aquata, Alana, Ariel Relationship with Family — has a good relationship with his sister who is still alive and that fam, they live on land these days tho closer to the shore tbh?? They probably work together. Really close with Attina, Andrina, Aquata. Has a good relationship with Arista too. Strained relationships with Ariel and Adella and Alana (in that order of most to least strained lol) Car — 2012 Honda Odyssey in grey -- “The Humpback” Career — CEO of Triton Industries, a nonprofit that works towards ocean clean up. Dream Career — Uh, probably exactly what he is doing tbh Dream Life — being able to move between the land and the ocean freely without fear of repercussion, athena alive, all his daughters happy, retired with grandbabies Love Life — non-existent /tear; tho tbh probably gets hit on all the time. This makes him uncomfortable. Talents or Skills — good at chess, good cook, handy around the house, knows sign language/french/spanish, can sew a bit, play an instrument ?? (something brassy maybe the trumpet or drums) Intelligence Level — 8, he’s v intelligent. Finances — they rich af holla @ sunken treasure

Your Character’s Life Before Your Story:

Past Careers — uhhh worked in mer-government tbh probabyl like environment conservation   Past Lovers — like one girlfriend, he was not very smooth w the ladies Biggest Mistakes — being too controlling, letting athena out of his sight Biggest Achievements — watching attina and adella graduate, all his daughters being safe and (mostly) happy!!, his company, his solid place on the board

[allofthisnonsenseplease]

firesonic152 - 08/25/2017 have we done reckless treasure hunter au yet it feels like something that needs to happen if it hasn't XD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/25/2017 We have NOT done reckless treasure hunter AU yet! =D

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 okay so reckless treasure hunter au a la uncharted/indiana jones/the mummy/etc who's the main treasure hunter, gabe? and if so how did jack get stuck on the adventure XD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Jack isn't the idiot idealistic treasure hunter and Gabe is the experienced traveler/best friend along to keep him from getting himself killed? XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OMG love jack is like I'M DOING THE THING and gabe is like You Will Die if i don't help so

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 and pining along the way! =D

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 lol gabe is like a rando in a tavern who just overhears jack talking to someone about his adventure plans and gabe is  like banging his head against the bar finally just gets up, slides into the free chair at jack's table, and says hey kid i'm coming bc you are an idiot

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD Gabe just inviting himself along That's how he's gotten to have all his awesome adventures! He meets tons of explorers and treasure hunters of varying levels of skill and just ends up playing advisor or tagging along for fun Jack's all: 'But how do I know you're as good at this as you say?' and Gabe's like: 'What the fuck do you want, a resume?' And he invites Jack back to his place, and Jack is all cool, guy's hot and I could do with a good fuck but Gabe's walls are covered with photos from his adventures and ones of him posing with people famous in the explorer circles Jack's aiming to join

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OMGG LOL JACK GETS THE WRONG IDEA AND THINKS GABE IS LOOKING FOR A ONE NIGHT STAND ONLY TO DISCOVER HE ACTUALLY WANTS TO COME ON THE ADVENTUREE and by the time that's made clear jack's like "GODdammit now i really just wanna fuck him >>"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 ^^ heehee yes. good. Jack spends the entire adventure trying to impress Gabe to get into his pants and fucking shit up bc he's not paying attention. But when things DO go south, and he's actually trying to keep them alive, he's kinda badass. Gabe cant figure out if he's an idiot, or someone who could be really good at this with a bit of experience.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHAHA JACK QUIT SHOWBOATING AND FOCUS he does like dumb shit too like trip and totally miss the intended booby trap, instead accidentally crashing through the very old wall

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 JACK. Some respect for antiquities, please!

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 ahahahaha gabriel's always getting distracted by cool structures and wall carvings and telling long stories about history that jack didn't even know happened jack tends to zone out and just listen to gabe's voice without really hearing the words bc it's so soothing lol

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 oh lord. XD We gotta give him something tho, don't we? What if Jack actually has a background in linguistics and can decipher some of hte ancient languages they run across, but it's like that tumblr post that talks about how it really goes, and it's all full of unclear meanings and doesn't scan well in English and he gets so distracted puzzling over it that he forgets to run for his life when traps are sprung?

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OMG gabe knows spanish but jack offhandedly seems to be at least a little fluent in everything????

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 He surprises Gabe towards the end by having understood Spanish the whole time, and Gabe is SO annoyed and indignant over it, 'cause not all he was saying was insults and curses, some of it was about how hot Jack is and what Gabe wants to do to him, and he's just I THOUGHT YOU WERE AN EXPERT ON DEAD LANGUAGES and Jack is just -'.'- that doesn't preclude me knowing a few commonly used ones. It could be that Jack understands Spanish and a few others, but doesn't speak them well. XD Like, he can manage to order food and ask directions, so Gabe thinks he just knows basic tourist phrases and that anything quick and/or complicated will go right over his blocky, blond head

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 i love that shit he has a terrible accent but he can understand almost everything and like some really random languages too lmao

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Jack def knows klingon. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHA

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 and possibly elvish XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 NERD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 that's where he got his start! =D

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 when gabe is like WHAT OTHER LANGUAGES DO YOU KNOW jack sheepishly lists those off and gabe is internally like holy shit i'm in love with a Nerd

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 and he just branched out from there, and went into ancient languages 'cause they felt closer to these made up ones bc there aren't native speakers he can learn from

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 >w<

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 okay, but...Gabe being like. Klingon? Seriously?? Wait. Wait wait wait. Hang on. And he produces a photo of himself in Klingon cosplay. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 GAAAAABE THAT'S GAY

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD Dude. The Klingon guy was a fukkin' teddy bear (from the few eps I remember XD)

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 i'm dying what treasure are they going after a golden corn idol?? maybe a cool red and black orb thing like the reaper souls

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 hrmmm.... XD They get to the center of the massive temple filled with deadly traps and Jack is just THE REAL TREASURE WAS THE FRIENDS WE MADE ALONG THE WAY! :D

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHAHA JACK

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Hell, maybe Jack just wants to find some lost manuscripts or something. And he's all gaga over this treasure, but he doesn't tell gabe exactly what it is, only that it's priceless.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 omfg it's some nerdy linguistic rosetta stone shit

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 oh also in terms of skillsets jack is the one who can Actually Aim a pistol

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 BUT HE'S ALSO THE IDIOT WHO INSISTS OF HOLSTERING IT AND BRINGING A KNIFE TO A KNIFE FIGHT????

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 they're in a situation where they need to be accurate and jack is like "GABE SHOOT THE THING" and gabe looks down at his shotgun like uh well LOLLL gabe doesn't even know jack is a good shot until that moment bc jack always insists on Punch

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 X'''D Just picturing them trying to flee the temple as it crumbles aroun them, and Jack's pack and arms are filled to bursting with clay tablets, rendering him USELESS

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHA

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Gabe: Just DROP THEM!! Jack: They're PRICELESS!! I can't just let them be LOST FOREVER!! Gabe: It's those damn tablets or US! Jack: WELL IF YOU HAD LET ME TAKE RUBBINGS OF THEM-- Gabe: THE ROOF WAS LITERALLY STARTING TO CAVE IN ON US

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AKJCNAEKCJNASCKK later tho gabe decides it's worth it bc he's literally never seen jack so happy

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Oooh! Ooh ooh ooh!!! Can this be another one where Gabe is good at drawing and Jack compliments him on the sketches he does of some of the temple rooms and engravings?? And, like, it's one of the few interactions where Jack's Thirst doesn't take center stage in his interest in Gabe???? ((i <3 artist!Gabe))

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 omg yes!!!! he does the nathan drake thing where he has a journal that he just draws everything in >w< and he draws jack!!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 looking thru it later, Jack finds himself included in the sketches, and he actually blushes. He puts the journal back before Gabe catchins him peeking. XD <3<3<3

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 eeeeeeeheee one of them is him sleeping

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 he fell asleep after one of their big escapes and he was still covered in dirt and shit but gabe just had to capture it

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 there's one of him bent over a manuscript he's trying to interpret, brow a bit furrowed in concentration. Next to it is a rouch sketch of his face lit up with excitement from where he'd puzzled out a difficult piecec.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 akciaskjcnasckasnjc jack does appreciate the sassy commentary gabe adds to some of his drawings and notes lol but ahhhh some of the pages are very clearly gabe just. practicing drawing jack's face like they're unfinished and rough and slowly improving

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 awww -^^- pfft. omg. okay, but, when Jack shows up on the morning they're supposed to start their trip, he's dressed like Indiana Jones, and Gabe just snorts and says that he looks like he's form the porno ripoff. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHA the nathan drake look suits him better i think can u tell i'm in love w nathan drake

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 I've seen your posts from the game. ^^ ((i actually have not seen/played anything from your list, except i think i saw part of The Mummy a long time ago. Also, the heart-ripping-out scene from one of the IJ flicks))

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 WAIT SERIOUSLY YOU'VE NEVER SEEN.... INDIANA JONES LIKE. NOT EVEN THE FIRST ONE ??????????

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Nope. I was v young when i accidentally saw the heart thing and it kinda freaked me out. ^^;;;;;;;;;

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 WELL LISTEN YOU GOTTA the second movie isn't even the seCOND MOVIE IS THE WORST ONE ANYWAY WATCH THE FIRST AND THE THIRD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD no scary ritualistic murders in those?

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 NO JUST A GOOD TIME AND LOTS OF PUNCHING NAZIS well there is a bit at the end of the first one where they melt a bunch of nazis with the power of god but

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 i feel like i might have seen a clip from that??

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 you almost certainly have oh my god i can't believe you've never seen indiana jones please fix this

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD my dude, there are HUGE FUCKING GAPS in my pop culture awareness

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 THE THIRD ONE HAS SEAN CONNERY IN IT I'M

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 I KNOW WHO HE IS!!! =D

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 WATCH!!!! THESE MOVIES OH MY GOD i don't know if i can continue to associate w you if you don't

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 W O W okay i see how it is XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 YES YOU DO WATCH INDIANA JONES

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 I'll add it to the list of stuff I need to watch =)

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 ADD IT TO THE TOP OF THE LIST I WILL LITERALLY BUY YOU A DVD OF IT OFF AMAZON AND SEND IT TO YOU IF THAT'S WHAT IT WILL TAKE

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 No, no. Don't do that. I'm sure I can find it on youtube or something.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 skjcnskjscnskejcn anyway this got so off topic XDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 which one's the first one?

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 I WAS LITERALLY JUST ABOUT TO TALK ABOUT GABE DOING THE CLASSIC INDIANA JONES MOVE OF SLIDING THROUGH A CLOSING DOORWAY AND LOSING HIS HAT AND HAVING TO GRAB IT AT THE LAST SECOND BUT YOU'VE NEVER SEEN IT raiders of the lost ark

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 I've seen it referenced in, like, EVERYTHING I'm familiar with bits and pieces. Like, I know he fukking shoots some guy threatening him with a sword. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 YES ALCJNAEFKJN AND SO MANY CLASSIC LINES "asps. very dangerous. you go first" "snakes... why'd it have to be snakes" "bad dates" SO MANY GOOD LINES

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 hahaha we had these felt critter hats when I worked at Michael's and one was a snake and i put it on and joked about making an asp of myself and no one at work got the pun ._.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 ksjvnskjnaekucnaec that's a quality pun right there my dude .... ANYWAY WHAT WERE WE TALKING ABOUT

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 anyways. Gabe nearly losing his beanie while sliding under a closing trap door

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 XDDD jack: FORGET THE BEANIE GABE OH MY GOD gabe: I LET YOU KEEP YOUR TABLETS jack: YOU CAN BUY BEANIES IN A STORE GABE!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 X'''''''''D Gabe: YOU CAN BUY PLAYDOH AND MAKE YOUR OWN FUCKNG TABLETS

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHAHA so when do we get to shoot jack >w>

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Well, do you want a dramatic, one-time thing? Or do you want Jack to be a walking target? Kids running through a village square shoot him with water guns. They run across a reclusive village and he gets shot with blow darts. The bad guys graze his arm during a chase. Gabe finger guns his way out of small problems, leaving them for Jack to solve. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 lolllll jack gets doped up by a blow dart and gets all sleepy and cuddly

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 d'awww X3 Gabe acts more bothered by it than he really is, and hopes that Jack won't remember much when he wakes up. -^^-

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 >w<

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 !!! okay, so what if Jack, in SUPER NERDY FASHION has a rosetta stone-shaped tattoo on his back filled up with, like, a personal motto or something written over and over in all the dead languages he's learned with room towards the bottom for him to add if he learns a few more. and Gabe teases the hell out of him for it, but the first time they sleep together, Jack's on his knees and Gabe's behind and when Gabe traces over some of the writing in response to Jack's demand for touch, Jack gasps out the words in whatever language Gabe is tracing.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OH MY GOD DUDE OH MY GOD????

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 ^^ the first two ar Klingon and Elvish. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 lmao fuckin NERD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 OF COURSE

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 ooooo damn i wanna draw that tattoo and it's a dumb motto like one of the things he says in the game like "no guts no glory"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 eat your yogurt

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 AHAHA

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 "i love the smell of charcoal in the morning"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 X''''''''D Jack says it in horribly accented Spanish after Gabe goes through all the ones tattooed there, and that's when Gabe realizes that he knows more than he'd let on. He starts going much harder, murmuring all sorts of flithy things in Jack's ear which only gets Jack even more riled up.

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 iunuyghcrfyvkhbihbijni WHEN DO THEY GET TOGETHER THO do they find an ancient ring or something and jack jokingly puts it on gabe's ring finger

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 SURPRISE IT'S CURSED AND POISON-TIPPED PRONGS POP OUT WHEN IT HEATS UP TO BODY TEMPERATURE

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 LOLLL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 ((i read a horror story like that once, only it was a bracelet and also not scary)) pretty jade ring? ^^ or Gabe finds something like that and tosses it to Jack who fumbles it, but manages to catch it and glares and then notices there's an inscription and it's something about a long and happy future and much fertility between the giver of the ring and the reciever i dunno maybe jack nearly gets his dumb ass killed 'cause he had to choose between saving the tablets or gabe's hat and he chose both and nearly fell into a pit

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OMG

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 OR! What if, running through the traps, they think they make it out safe until Jack notices one of  the poisoned darts in his ankle and, like, passes out. When he comes too, Gabe just full on kisses him and is like I THOUGHT THE POISON HAD KILLED YOU but Jack is just 'What? No. It's a thousand years old it's lost all its potency. i just haven't slept since I started taking pics of all these new writings that need translating.'

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 OMGGG I LOVE THAT SO MUCH gabe stares at him and is like "WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT YOUR TERRIBLE SLEEP HABITS LATER" and kisses him again

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/26/2017 Jack has no issues with this turn of events. XD

firesonic152 - 08/26/2017 >w<

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 jack tries to convince gabe to fuck him right there in the ancient temple gabe is sure that's a good way to get some kind of obscure disease

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Gabe: Gross, Jack. Didn't they used to conduct virgin sacrifices on that altar? Jack: Well, I'm not a virgin, so Gabe: ENTIRELY not the point.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 gabe, mumbling: also "virgin sacrifices" referred to virgin blood as in blood that hadn't been used in a ritual before, not someone who had never had sex before but jack: jack: fuck me now

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 okay. p sure in those campy ass movies with melting nazis, virgin sacrifices are EXACTLY what they sound like

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 XDDDD i want a scene where gabe is trying to read latin and pronounces it like italian and jack is disgusted

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 jack: i can't believe it gabe: what jack: i'm actually Unattracted to you right now

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Cue Jack scooting in so close to Gabe that he ends up with Gabe's arm around his shoulder as he points to teh line Gabe was mispronouncing and walks him through it.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 eeeeeeeeeeeeee jack: all "c"s and "g"s are hard... gabe: lol jack, smacking him: FOCUS THIS IS SERIOUS

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Ah!! That sort of thing continuing after they've gotten together, and Gabe can bait Jack in close by mucking up his pronounciation and then yank Jack into his lap to cuddle him and Jack actually won't object 'cause he's too busy lecturing! XD

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 EEEEEEEEE gabe starts kissing jack's neck and jack is like "I'M LITERALLY NOT EVEN IN THE MOOD FOR ONCE THIS MAKES ME TOO MAD"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Gabe, as his hands wander lower on Jack's body: Come on, mi sol...I just want to see how long you can keep up that perfect enunciation.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 kjnskjcnksjnckjnd bc of course jack is the nerd that can Speak Latin he starts muttering angrily in latin as gabe gets more and more thorough gabe's goal is to get to the point where jack doesn't have the brain to do that anymore

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 X3 go go gabe!

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 it takes a surprisingly long time like gabe is already fucking him and has bowled him over onto his back

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Jack has switched over from whatever he was reading to shouting encouragement and praise in Latin. Gabe is startled by how effectively that works on him.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 HEEEEEEEEEE BEES!!!! gabe doesn't really know what he's saying at first until one of the phrases is really similar to spanish and he's like Oh

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Gabe's a bit surprised at some of the stuff Jack translates for him later, but Jack just kinda smirks and asks if he really thinks people have changed so much over time.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 >w> also in the reckless treasure hunter au when do we get to the part where gabe gets cursed by some artifact and becomes reaper lol

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 They've been together for a while, still traveling all around the world to check out beautiful or strange sites. At one location where getting almost all the way to the heart of the crypt was a total breeze, Gabe starts getting antsy while Jack is puzzing over an inscription outside the last door. Gabe: Let's just go on in. There's probably LOADS more interesting stuff inside. Jack: Give me a bit longer. I think this is a warning. Gabe: About what, dust? Jack, this place has been a cake walk. ... . . . Jack. Jaaaaaaaaaack. Jackie. Hey, Ja-- Jack: Gabe. Gabe: Yes, mi sol, mi luna, mi estrella brillante? Jack: See those pictograms? I'm about 90 percent sure they mean 'curse'. Gabe, laughing: Oh, come ON, Jackie! Don't tell me you believe that shit! Jack: I don't know what I believe because I haven't finished translating yet. But go ahead, go ahead. Touch the cursed door. Gabe: Well, I mean, if you're almost done-- Jack: No, no! You wanted SOOOO badly to rush on ahead. Be my guest. I dare you. Gabe: ...I really think you'd be safer with me around, so if you're almost finished... Jack: I double dog dare you. Gabe: . . . if i get cursed, it's YOUR fault. Gabe gets cursed. It's both their faults.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 LOL GABE IDIOT MOVE the curse IS convenient for exploring though he can just walk through traps to trigger them and then jack can follow with no worry

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 oh, how sweet. -^^-

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 also now jack gets to give gabe bullshit forever about not listening to him and gabe is never allowed to complain about jack insisting on reading Everything without it getting thrown in his face

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 XD so...not running with Jack feeling HORRIBLY GUILTY about daring his boyfriend to get cursed? lol and then being so awfully conflicted when they figure out that Gabe has shadow tentacles now?

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 WELL OF COURSE THAT TOO jack just covers it up with snark and sass until it becomes a problem naturally aijcnaskjcn he starts losing sleep to study harder bc maybe if he could just have translated faster...

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 jack you don't have any sleep to lose

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 he like lies in bed with gabe until gabe falls asleep and then gets up again which... makes him extra clumsy when they're adventuring

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 oh dear oooh...what if Jack keeps talking about finding a way to break the curse and even tho Gabe's been pretty chill with it, they start getting into arguments until Gabe finally agrees and calls in some of his old adventuring buddies for suggestions and one of them is all 'oh, so this is that newbie you were complaining about? the one you said was going to be the death of you??' and jack is just well. great.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 sekjnsakjncsd cue gabe's old adventuring buddies picking on jack a bunch? XD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 and jack feeling more and more like crap, so he pushes himself more when they're exploring while still losing sleep to study more.

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 why is he like this who are these asshole adventuring buddies anyway wth XD doomfist i guess?? and widow??

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Rein & Ana

firesonic152 - 08/27/2017 awww but they're nice people gabe can't punch them out to defend jack's honor

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/27/2017 Well, I mean, if they're ribbing on Jack for actual things he does/Gabe said, then whatever. Maybe they make fun of Gabe too for getting himself cursed, and that's what Jack actually snaps at them over.