#but know we’ll never attain

[iuchamjohta]

From dream to reality ft YooA

Words 5860

Tags: Threesome, double penetration, double blowjob, hard fuck, carry sex.

See end for notes.

You sat at the corner of WM Entertainment’s practice, heart heavy, and minds full. The room, which used to be full of energy, now felt cramped and overwhelming. Mirrors lined the walls, reflecting the fatigue and stress that filled the space. As you caught your breath, you watched your fellow trainees go through their routine.

Your recent evaluation had not gone well. Your performance, despite weeks of arduous preparation, had left the evaluators unimpressed. Their words still echoed in my mind: “If you fail again, you will be asked to leave as a trainee. There will be no more chances.”

The weight of those words was crushing. Every moment felt heavy, laden with the crushing disappointment of having fallen short. Your heart, which had once soared with the hope of debuting on stage and stepping into the limelight, now felt like it was sinking into a pit of despair. The dream that had initially seemed so attainable now felt cruelly out of reach. The idea of never achieving your goal—and never having another chance to be with YooA—was unbearable.

YooA. Her name was like a melody that had played in your heart since the beginning. Ever since you saw her on stage for the first time, it had drawn you to WM Entertainment. She was the reason you had pushed yourself so hard, the reason you had endured countless hours of practice. She was the brightest star to you in WM Entertainment. Her performances were mesmerizing, and her presence seemed to bring a sense of warmth that was impossible to ignore. It was her that gave you inspiration and had driven you to join the company in the first place, to pursue a dream that had initially felt so distant. She was your light. To be near her, to even dream of winning her favor, had initially seemed like an impossible fantasy, but now, even that dream seemed to be slipping through my fingers.

Your heart raced not just from the physical exertion but from the looming weight of the upcoming evaluation—the one that would determine your future with WM Entertainment. With your head hung low, you walked down the dimly lit corridor. You could hear the soft murmur of voices coming from the staff lounge as you dragged your feet across. To your surprise when you looked up, you noticed YooA, the girl you had admired from far, was chatting animatedly with a few other trainees. Her laughter was light, her presence radiant, and seeing her like this only served to deepen my sense of hopelessness. You knew you had to muster every bit of courage you had left.

With nothing left to lose, you took a deep breath and approached her, your heart pounding furiously in your chest. You felt a flush of embarrassment and nervousness as you stammered, “YooA, can I talk to you for a moment?”

Her eyes lit up with curiosity and kindness. “Of course! What’s on your mind?”

“I just wanted to let you know that I’ve been working really hard,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady despite the quiver you felt. “I know this might sound strange, but I really admire you, and I was wondering if you’d be willing to go out with me sometime.”

 YooA’s eyes widened slightly, a playful smirk curling on her lips as she looked me over. “Oh, I’m flattered,” she said, her smile gentle yet teasing. “But considering your recent evaluations, I think it’s best to focus on improving first. I’m afraid I can’t say yes to that right now” A wave of embarrassment and disappointment washed over you. You felt a flush of heat rise to my cheeks as you were further crushed. “Oh, I understand. I just thought I’d ask.”

YooA saw your visible disappointment. Her expression softened, and she leaned in slightly, her voice taking on a gentler tone. “However, if you do manage to debut, if you really make it. I’d be more than happy to reconsider. I’m rooting for you, you know. Prove me wrong, and we’ll see what happens” Her words were like a spark igniting a dormant flame. Though you were stung by the rejection, the promise she held out was enough to rekindle your hope. You nodded, trying to mask the surge of renewed determination. “Thank you, YooA. I won’t let you down.”

That night, you made a promise to yourself. You would work harder than you ever had before. Driven not only by the fear of failure but by the hope of proving yourself worthy of both the debut and YooA’s promise.

Every day before dawn, you would begin your routine with rigorous vocal exercises that tested the limits of your stamina. You spent hours perfecting your technique, refining your pitch, and strengthening your range. In the afternoons, you immersed yourself in dance practice. You would replay choreography videos over and over, trying to mimic every move with precision. Your muscles ached, but you pressed on, nonetheless. You recorded your practice sessions to scrutinize your performance, adjusting to ensure every move was flawless. You practiced until your body felt like it was made of lead, until you could barely lift my limbs, but you kept going, driven by the knowledge that every improvement brought you one step closer to your goal. You were determined to impress YooA.

The nights were spent studying. You poured over videos other idols, analyzing their performances and their stage presence. You copied their gestures, their expressions, their movements. You took notes, practiced your expressions in the mirror, and worked on your charisma.

Social interactions became rare. Your friends and family grew worried about your isolation, but you were resolute. You were determined to make every sacrifice count, to transform every ounce of doubt into strength. Your days blended into one long routine of training, but you welcomed the monotony because it meant you were closer to your goal. The other trainees watched you with a mixture of curiosity and sympathy. Some offered words of encouragement, while others expressed doubt. You ignored the haters and used their skepticism as motivation. You sought feedback from mentors and took every criticism to heart, viewing each as an opportunity to improve.

As the weeks passed, your dedication began to pay off. Your stamina increased, your voice became more powerful, and your dance moves more precise. You could feel the difference in your performances. You grew more confident, and the hope of debuting became a tangible reality. Finally, the day of the next evaluation arrived. You stood backstage, heart racing with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. Your mind was clear, your body ready. You had given everything you had, and now it was time to show what you could do. The moment your name was called, you stepped onto the stage, feeling the weight of your hopes and fears pressing down on you. You gave it everything you had. Every move, every note was performed with a blend of desperation and determination. The judges watched closely; their expressions unreadable. As you finished your routine, you felt a mix of relief and uncertainty. You had done your best, but the outcome was now out of your hands. The wait for the results was agonizing. You paced the hallways, replaying every moment of your performance in your mind. When your name was finally called. You walked in and noticed the shift in the judges’ expressions, from stern to impressed.  “Congratulations,” one of them said, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. “You’ve made significant progress. We believe you’re ready for the next step.”

You could not believe what you have heard. After months of intense training and grueling evaluations, you’ve finally achieved your dream: your debut is set! The hard work, sweat, and perseverance have all come to fruition, and you’re on the brink of a major career milestone. Bursting with excitement, you ran out of the room and scrolling through the contact list, you found YooA name from the number she had given you after making her promise to you. Nervously, you fumbled around with the keyboard before successfully typing in a few words.

After receiving YooA’s enthusiastic reply, your heart felt like it was bursting with joy. You could hardly contain your excitement as you read her message again and again. The thought of finally spending time with her, celebrating your debut, and sharing this special moment was exhilarating. You hurriedly made plans for tomorrow, trying to decide what to wear and how to make the day as perfect as possible. Every detail seemed to matter, from picking out an outfit that would make a good impression to planning how you would express your gratitude for her support. As evening fell and you prepared for bed, sleep seemed elusive. Your mind raced with thoughts of the upcoming day, replaying the highlights of your debut and imagining the joy of being with YooA. The anticipation made it almost impossible to settle down, but you forced yourself to rest, knowing that tomorrow was a big day.

The next day you came to the dance room YooA had mentioned, curious as to why she had called you to there as the meeting point for your date. As you opened the door, YooA was already there. She wears a sleek dress that hugs her curves, and her full lips are glossed, making them look even more mouthwatering than you remembered. You walked in, captivated by her presence. “YooA, noona, you look incredible,” you said, your voice gave away your admiration that you had for her “Why did you choose this room for today?”

YooA turned to you, her eyes glinting with confidence. “Thank you. I needed a special place for something important,” she said, her voice carrying a hint of mischief. “I have to test something first before we get any further.” You raised an eyebrow, feeling a surge of curiosity. “What do you need to test?” YooA took a step closer, her gaze intense yet inviting. “I want to see if we can connect on a more intimate level and if you can satisfy my needs,” she said candidly. “It’s important to me that we’re on the same wavelength before we move forward.” Your heart raced as you processed her words. You understood the gravity of the situation and appreciated her directness. Of the million other possible outcomes, this was not one that you had expected for your first date. Before you could fully process everything that was happening. YooA closed the distance between you, her lips meeting yours in a passionate kiss. The softness of her lips was mesmerizing—one of the most tender and enchanting experiences you’d ever had. Each touch was a delicate promise, a dance of intimacy that left you breathless. You continued, backing her against the wall before crushing your lips against hers again. Her lips tasted indelibly sweet, and you groan as her tongue tangles with yours. Her hands roam over your body, igniting the fire burning within you. The kiss deepened, growing more passionate but just as you both were losing yourself in the moment, the door to the dance room swings open. Frozen in place, you watch as another man steps into the room. He's younger, with curvy hair and a lean frame, and he wears a similar look of surprise on his face. You recognise him from yesterday’s evaluation and remembered that he too had passed the final round of evaluation and was set to debut. His name was Jin-Woo if you had remembered correctly. Was, he going to be your future band member? That you do not know. You were more curious as to why he was here at the dance room too.

“Noona, who… is this?” you asked sounding puzzled. Yooa pulled away from you, her cheeks flushed. “Well… Let’s just say I made a promise to him too, that I will consider him if he succeeds too.” She explained. The realization hit you like a wave. The romantic promise you had felt so deeply connected to was part of a larger plan, a test of sorts that extended beyond your own moment with her. “Actually, I only promised that I would consider both of you and this is your final evaluation, to see which one of you can satisfy me the most”. You glance at Jin-Woo, jealousy and curiosity warring within you. YooA seemed to have noticed your hesitation and disappointment. She gives you a wicked grin. "Don’t worry, I am sure I can take on you both" she says, her voice low and enticing. "Let me show you." “Fuck it” you said, you were not going to miss out on this opportunity with your dream girl offering herself in front of you just cause another guy joins in. If anything, you were confident with your body and believed you would come up on top. You stepped forward, determination fueling your desire. The other man follows suit, and YooA positions herself on a nearby couch, patting the space beside her. "Let's see what you've been hiding, boys," she coos, and her fingers trail down the neckline of her dress, exposing her generous cleavage. You waste no time, shedding your clothes and stepping out of your pants, your cock springing free. YooA's eyes widen at the sight of your thickness, and she licks her lips in anticipation. The other man joins you, his length slightly shorter, but impressive as well, and YooA's breath quickens. "My, my," she says, "Looks like I'm in for a treat."

You both join her on the couch, your cocks twitching with anticipation. YooA takes a moment to admire you both, her gaze burning with desire. Then, with a sultry smile, she leans forward and takes you both into her hands. Her touch is electric, her palms soft and her grip firm. She strokes you slowly at first, her fingers tightening around your shafts. You groan, your head falling back as pleasure sparks through you. YooA's touch is expert, her palms sliding up and down, teasing the sensitive tips. "Mmm, you both feel so good," she purrs, and you can feel her warm breath on your skin. Then, with a swift movement, she leans down and takes you into her mouth. Your cock disappears between her full lips, and you gasp as her wet heat surrounds you. She sucks slowly, her tongue swirling and her lips gliding over your length. It's the best blowjob you've ever experienced, and you struggle to hold back your orgasm as she works her magic. She had the best dick sucking lips in your opinion. YooA hums in satisfaction, vibrating around you, and you bite your lip to stop from crying out. She takes her time, sucking and licking, exploring every inch of you with her mouth. Her hands roam over your thighs, squeezing and caressing, encouraging you to thrust gently into her mouth. As you thrust into that hole made by her mouth, her tongue and lips working in harmony, suction just perfect. Every time your thrust meets her face, she slurps, the sounds so dirty and sexy. You can see why she took you both on at the same time. You cannot imagine how anyone can last for a few minutes if she focused on just one man. YooA releases you from her mouth with a wet pop, her eyes sparkling with satisfaction. "Tasty," she murmurs, before turning her attention to the other man, devouring him with equal enthusiasm. Your eyes drift to the other man, and you see him thrown back in pleasure, his hands clenching and unclenching as YooA swirls her tongue around his tip. She takes him deep, her throat constricting around him, and he gasps, his hips jerking involuntarily. You stroke yourself as you watch, unable to tear your eyes away from the erotic display. YooA bobs her head down unto Jin-woo, her lips stretched around his thickness, while her hand started pumping the base of your cock. She sucks and licks, her tongue never ceasing its skillful dance. She started alternating between both of you, switching after a few bobs on both of your shafts. You can't take your eyes off her as she deep throats you both with ease, her lips wrapping tightly around your girth, her eyes fluttering closed in pleasure. She moans as she works, the vibrations sending shocks of pleasure through you.

Jin-Woo is the first to lose his battle, grunting as he fills YooA's mouth with his release. YooA hums in satisfaction, swallowing around him, milking him dry with her lips and tongue. You were not far behind, when she takes your cock in again you thrust your hips, burying yourself in her mouth and you explode. YooA takes every drop, sucking and licking until you're spent, then releases you with a satisfied smile. You both collapse on the couch, breathless and sated, while YooA sits back, a self-satisfied smile on her face. She runs her tongue over her lips, tasting the remaining cum on her lips. "That was incredible," you both manage to say in union, still reeling from the intensity of your release. YooA laughs, a husky sound that sends a thrill through you. “Now let’s see which one of you can satisfy me better”.

Jin-Woo didn’t waste any time.  He immediately positioned himself between YooA's thighs and started eating her out. “Someone’s eager” YooA chuckled. Jin-woo continued to feast on YooA’s pussy, lapping away eagerly, desperate to please YooA. You watched as Jin-Woo licked and sucked on her clit, his tongue dancing over her sensitive bud. YooA moaned softly, her hands running through his hair, encouraging him. You stroked your thick cock, feeling it pulse with anticipation. You knew you could do better than this guy. YooA needed something harder, something wilder but you were going to patiently wait for your turn before giving her what she wants. Jin-woo then stood up, his cock rock hard and ready for her. Positioning YooA with her back on the dance floor, he rubbed his cock up and down her slit, wetting his tip before entering her slowly. Their eyes locked as he filled her up and YooA wrapped her legs around him. "Fuck me, Jin-Woo," YooA moaned, her nails digging into his back. "Yes, Noona” Jin-woo responded, thrusting himself into YooA. Jin-woo moved his hips at a slow pace. It appears he was relatively new to this and wanted to take things slow. He slowly built up a rhythm, grasping her thighs, pulling her towards him as he thurst, forcing his cock even deeper inside her. However, YooA seemed to have gotten inpatient and wanted to control of the pace. Flipping Jin-woo unto his back this time, YooA straddled Jin-woo, positioning his cock in front of her pussy and in one fell swoop, sank herself down, swallowing his entire length. “Oh my God, Noona, this feels so good” Jin-woo grunted. YooA continued riding him vigorously, lifting her hips before lowering it down quickly again causing Jin-Woo eyes to roll back slightly and let out a moan. The sight of YooA ass bouncing with each thrust and her tits flailing was too much for you to handle. Getting impatient, you went behind YooA and lifted her off Jin-Woo’s shaft, causing her to pout from a temporary emptiness.

“My turn now” Positioning her on fours, you lined your cock, before driving it deep inside her with a swift, powerful thrust. YooA lets out another moan a mixture of surprise and pleasure. This was a very different treatment as compared to Jin-Woo. Grabbing her shoulder, you begin to set a fierce pace. You fuck her with long, hard strokes, your cock plunging deep into her wetness. "Oh fuck, yes!" YooA cries out, her head tipping back. "Harder, Y/N Give it to me harder!" Her words spur you on, and you began to pull her towards you with every thrust, forcing your cock even deeper inside her. You feel her pussy clench around you as she became increasingly wet. The sound of your passionate fucking soon filled the dance room. Then grabbing a handful of her hair and pulling her head back, you slammed harder into her. You feel her walls stretch to accommodate your thickness, and the sight of your cock disappearing into her sends a jolt of arousal through you. You continued to fuck her with abandon, your balls slapping against her clit with each forceful thrust. "You like that, don't you?" you grunt, pulling her hair slightly to expose her neck. "You like it when I take control and give you what you need." "Yes!" she pants, her eyes wild with lust. "I want you to fuck me senseless. Make me cum around your big cock." Her dirty words send a bolt of desire through you. Looking around the dance room, an idea crossed your head. You grabbed YooA by the waist and lifted her effortlessly, positioning her in a standing doggy-style pose. Using the sofa now as leverage, you continued to thrust into YooA with force. Her juices were already flowing, coating your cock with her sweet nectar. You slid your hand between her thighs, rubbing her clit in circular motions, never slowing his relentless thrusts. YooA's breath quickened, her moans filling the room. "Fuck, yes... harder, YN," she pleaded.

Obliging her request, you quickened his pace, pounding into her with forceful strokes. Using your hand, you lifted one of her legs, giving you an even deeper angle to plow her hungry pussy. YooA's nails dug into the sofa, leaving marks on the surface as she struggled to maintain her balance amidst the barrage of pleasure. Then, with a mischievous glint in his eye, you executed your original plan of placing her in this standing doggy position. You led YooA towards the full-length mirror at the other end of the dance room, the whole time your shaft was still buried deep inside her. Grabbing her hair, you lifted her head and forced her to look at her reflection. YooA watched herself getting fucked, her chest heaving with each sharp intake of breath. She saw her dishevelled hair, her flushed face, and the way her body moved in perfect harmony with yours. "Look at yourself, YooA," You growled. "Look at what a fucking mess you are. Can't control yourself, can you? promising two trainees this, because you want us to fill you up. You're nothing but a slut for cock." YooA's eyes shut with arousal, relishing the filthy words. Seeing everything that transpired through the mirror served to turn both of you even more. You reached around, grasping YooA's throat with one hand while still mercilessly hammering into her. He squeezed gently, applying just enough pressure to heighten her arousal without restricting her breath. "Take it, YooA," you grunted. "Take my cock like the good little slut you are." Then from the corner of your eye, you see Jin-Woo approaching, while stroking his cock. It seems he too have gotten incredibly aroused and impatient after seeing the scene before him. Without needing instructions, he moved in front of YooA, offering his length to her waiting mouth. She opened eagerly, taking him in, sucking and twirling it with her tongue while you relentlessly fucked her from behind. Jin-woo started to thrust into her mouth, his balls slapping against her chin. YooA gagged slightly, but her skilled tongue and lips showed her expertise, making it clear she loved it. You got a little annoyed that the view of the mirror was now blocked, but you could imagine YooA's expression—her eyes rolling back in pleasure—and you knew she was getting closer to the edge from. You knew from feeling her pussy clenching around your cock, milking you for all your worth. You leaned forward, whispering into her ears “Cum for us, Noona. Let me feel that tight pussy clench around my cock." That was all it took. YooA's body stiffened, and she cried out around the cock in her mouth as she reached her climax. Her pussy walls contracted, pulsating wildly around your embedded shaft. As YooA's orgasm washed over her , Jin-woo also reached his limit, his hips bucking wildly as he filled YooA's mouth with his load, his eyes screwed shut in ecstasy. You watched, feeling YooA's pussy pulsate around you, and it pushed you over the edge. Gripping YooA's hips tightly , you unleashed your own orgasm, flooding her with your hot cum. All of you remained in this position for a moment, catching your breath, before YooA turned her head, her lips glistening with cum, and flashed you a seductive smile. "Now that," she purred, "was an impressive performance." “But we are not done yet, there’s one more hole you both have not filled.”

Stirred by her words, and the opportunity to fuck her ass, you and Jin-woo’s cock slowly began to come to life again. Even if both of you were spent, this was a once in a lifetime opportunity you would not want to miss out even if you must force out one more orgasm. You took a step forward, placing yourself directly behind YooA. "Are you ready for this, Noona?" you asked, your voice hoarse with anticipation. She nodded, her eyes sparkling with excitement and a hint of nervousness. "I want you to fuck me. Both of you. At the same time." You smiled, feeling your dick twitch with excitement. This was a fantasy come true. You reached out and grabbed her hips, pulling her towards you. She gasped as the head of your cock teased her tight asshole. With both hands, Jin-Woo reached between her legs lifting her up as you guided yourself to her entrance. "I'm going to stretch you out so good. You're going to feel so full and satisfied." You whispered. As Jin-woo lowered YooA down unto you, you slowly pushed your cock into her ass and she let out a loud moan, her body tensing momentarily before relaxing and allowing you to enter her. You felt the tight ring of her asshole surround your cock, and you couldn't help but groan at the sensation. "Fuck, that's tight," you muttered. "So fucking perfect."

Once she had taken your full length, you reached underneath to hold her thighs, supporting her weight and spreading them for Jin-Woo to enter. Jin-woo grabbed YooA’s hips and positioned himself at her pussy entrance. With a swift thrust, he slid into her, filling her completely. YooA cried out, overwhelmed by the sensation of being filled in both holes. She felt stretched and satisfied in a way she had never experienced before. "Oh my God," she breathed. "It feels so good." You started to move in sync, slowly at first, finding a steady rhythm. Then, you withdrew your cock almost entirely out of her ass before slamming back into her, feeling her tight hole clench around you. Jinwoo matched your pace, his hips slamming against YooA's, his cock sliding in and out of her pussy. The three of you formed a perfect symphony of carnal pleasure, your bodies moving as one. YooA's breasts bounced with each thrust, her nipples hardening as the pleasure built inside her. You reached around and squeezed her tits, pinching her nipples gently, causing her to cry out and buck her hips back against you. "That's it, Noona" you encouraged. "Take it all. You're doing so fucking well. You love getting fucked in both holes like a slut you are" Your words sent a shockwave of desire through her body, and she could feel her orgasm building. "Yes," she moaned. "I'm a slut. Please, make me cum. Fuck me harder." You obliged, grasping her hips tightly and slamming into her with full force. Jinwoo did the same, their balls slapping against her sensitive skin with each powerful thrust. The room was filled with the sounds of skin slapping against skin, mixed with the three of your lustful moans and profanities. YooA's pussy clenched around Jinwoo's cock as she cried out in pleasure. "I'm cumming! Oh God, I can't hold it anymore." Her ass tightened around your cock as she came, her body shaking and shuddering with intense pleasure. The feeling of her orgasm sent you over the edge, and you could feel your own release building. However, both of you were exhausted from this position of carrying and thrusting, eventually you and Jin-Woo’s thighs gave way, slumping unto the dance practice room floor with your cocks leaving her holes in the process.

“Don’t stop, fill me up” YooA moaned.

Jin-Woo smiles, and you can see the hunger in his eyes as well. This time you wanted YooA to ride you. Jin-Woo pulls out of YooA, and she got the message and turned to straddle you, taking your cock in her hands and positioning it at her entrance. She sinks down onto you, letting out a sigh of satisfaction as she fills herself with your length once again. Her eyes flutter closed as she begins to ride you, her hips moving in slow, sensual circles. But it's not long before she picks up the pace, her breath coming in short gasps as she rides him harder. Her pussy clenches around your cock with each ride, and you can feel her tightness squeezing him.

"Oh, fuck, YooA, you feel so good around my cock," you groaned, your hands grasping her hips as she rides you.

Moving your hands higher, you reached forward and begin to play with her tits, your fingers rubbing circles around the sensitive bud before giving them a firm squeeze. YooA lets out a sharp cry, her body tensing as a pleasure shock through her.

"Yes, Y/N, right there," she pants. " Harder. Fuck my pussy”

You obliged, your hips snapping up to meet her downward thrusts. The sound of their flesh slapping together fills the room, along with YooA's moans and cries of pleasure.

"That's it, fuck me like that," she cries. "I need all of you inside me."

Your cock is buried balls-deep inside her, and you began to thrust up roughly, your hips slamming into hers. YooA throws her head back, her long hair falling over her shoulders as she cries out. Jin-woo sees the lust and hunger on her face, and he knows she wants more. He positioned himself behind her again, his cock lined up with her tight hole. He pushes slowly, feeling the resistance, and then YooA relaxes, taking him in. Oh, fuck, that's it," she moans, as she continues to ride you, her body sandwiched between two hard cocks. Jin-Woo begins to thrust slowly, building up a rhythm as he fills her ass. It was his first anal experience, and he was doing his best not to cum too quickly. She was so tight and was squeezing the life out of him. Meanwhile, your hands continued to massage her breasts, squeezing and kneading the soft flesh as you watched Jin-Woo fuck her, slowing down your thrust to let Jin-Woo fit himself in.

"That's it, Jin-Woo, fuck her ass," you grunted. "She looks so damn hot like that."

YooA is lost in a haze of pleasure, her body being pleasured from both ends. She lets out a string of profanities as the two men fuck her, your cocks stretching her, filling her with pleasure. "Oh, God, I'm gonna cum," she cries. "Don't stop, keep fucking me!"

Jin-Woo feels her ass clench around him, and he knows she's on the edge. He reaches around and plays with her clit again, rubbing it in tight circles. "Cum for us, YooA," he says. "Let us feel it."

YooA screams as the orgasm rips through her, her body shaking as wave after wave of pleasure hits her. Jinwoo groans as he feels her pussy clench around him, and he can't hold on any longer. “I want it on my face this time” YooA declared sensing both of your impeding orgasm.

You and Jin-woo quickly pull out of her. You see a satisfied smile on her face. Her hair is wild, her makeup smudged, and her body glistening with a layer of sweat. She looks like a goddess who has just been thoroughly worshiped.

 "Do it, I want to feel both of your cum on my face." she says, looking at the both of you

You and Jin-woo need no further encouragement. You stand in front of her, your cocks already beginning to stir as YooA gets down on her knees, her face expectant.

You stroked your cock, your eyes never leaving YooA's face. You can't wait to coat her pretty features especially those lips with his cum. Jin-woo is doing the same, his eyes glazed over with desire.

"That's it," Yooa says, her voice husky. "Stroke those cocks and cover me with your cum."

You feel the pleasure building as you watched Jinwoo stroke his cock, the head already glistening with pre-cum. You know it won't be long now. "I'm gonna cum soon," you groaned.  "Me, too," Jinwoo adds.

"Then do it," YooA says, her tongue darting out to lick her lips. "Cover my face with your hot cum."

You couldn’t hold back any longer. With a sharp cry, you came, your load shooting out in thick ropes, landing on YooA's face. You see your cum coat her cheeks, her nose, and her lips, and you keep stroking to get every drop out.

Jin-Woo cums a second later, his cum mixing with yours on YooA's face. She closes her eyes, a look of pure pleasure on her face as she feels the warm liquid cover her.

"Oh, yes," she moans. "That's it. Cum for me." You and Jin-woo are utterly spent, your cocks beginning to soften. YooA reaches up and gently begins to rub the cum into her face, smearing it across her skin like a cream. She licks her lips, tasting the salty mixture, and then opens her mouth, sticking out her tongue to catch any last drops.

"Mmm, delicious," she purrs, her cum-coated face looking incredibly sexy. You and Jinwoo collapsed onto the floor; your bodies exhausted but satisfied. After lying on the floor for some time, you finally recovered and cleaned up all the mess that three of you have made. Grabbing some paper towels, you helped YooA cleaned her face as well. Taking this opportunity, YooA leaned into your ear and whispered, “You have passed my final evaluation with flying colours, I will contact you for a second date”. That day, after a magical afternoon with YooA, you returned to your cozy apartment, your heart still dancing with joy. Every detail of today replayed vividly in her mind. You knew that this day will be forever seared into your memory. The feel of YooA's body, the taste of her skin, and the sound of her cries of pleasure will fuel your fantasies for a long time to come. More than that, you are happy that you are given a chance to date the light of your life, the reason you have strived so hard for. Knowing your achievement, you drifted off to sleep with a big smile.

Thanks to the anon for the support to this piece! Hope you enjoy it. Feel free to send request ideas (refer to masterlist for details on which groups I accept) or commission a piece if you enjoy the writing.

[mmogurl]

In The Shadow of Dragons Chapter 8: Betrothal

18+ | 6.9k | Daemon Targaryen X Female OC | possessive, protective, objectifying, simping, raunchy Daemon | Uncle / niece incest, Targcest, Courtship, Mega smut, Don't read the rest of these tags if you don't want spoilers: Dubious consent, sleep groping, first time blow job, rough oral sex, forceful, dirty talk, deep throat. Probably missed some tags, but you get the idea, it's some filth.

The time has finally come for things to move forward! Have Daemon and Ryna actually managed to make it through their courtship without getting caught for all their improprieties? And how is the family going to react to the news? Find out in this thrilling installment of... IN THE SHADOW OF DRAGONS :) Told from Ryna's POV.

CH 1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4 | CH 5 | CH 6 | CH 7 | CH 8 | CH 9 Also on AO3

A fortnight had passed since the first time Daemon came to visit Ryna in her chambers and he had come several more times since. They had participated in every manner of foreplay imaginable and somehow the infamous Rogue Prince had managed to restrain himself from deflowering her. There had been times it had come close, where he had groaned so loudly in frustration that she worried someone might hear, but thankfully, they had managed to abstain without getting caught.

Ryna was still vexed by the tease of never being able to consummate their relationship. It was a nice relief to peak at his hands or for her to help alleviate his own torment in much the same way, but it always left her wanting more. She was desperate to know what it would feel like to have him inside of her and considering she’d remained a virgin well into sexual maturity, the curiosity was a powerful lure as well as the intense attraction she felt for Daemon.

So, it was a welcome release when one evening at dinner with the entire family gathered, her father finally spoke on the progress of their courtship. She was seated beside Daemon at the table as was typical, his hand rested on her lap possessively as they looked towards Viserys expectantly.

"Brother..." the king said authoritatively. "I did not think you capable of restraint, of comporting yourself with decency for even a short courtship, but I am most impressed with your efforts and it seems my daughter is quite satisfied as well." His gaze shifted to Ryna, regarding her with a soft smile before returning his attention to Daemon.

“I will admit that she has been an incredible temptation,” the prince replied with a smug countenance, preening with the recognition of his endeavors. “But the princess is worth waiting for, even if the delay has been excruciating.”

Ryna glanced at Daemon, his eyes meeting hers for a moment as his hand gripped her thigh with a mutually understood anticipation. This was what they had been waiting so urgently for, the sweet deliverance from imposed wooing into wedded bliss.

“That being said,” her father continued, his silent judgment flickering back and forth between Ryna and Daemon before finally settling into a good-natured grin. “I have deemed your courtship a success. You two are clearly fond of each other and your union will solidify our bloodline. My congratulations.”

Daemon’s fingers were practically digging into the soft flesh of her thigh even through the thick fabric of her dress. He was obviously excited by the king’s announcement, in knowing that they would finally be allowed to be together in a legally binding way, attaining access to all the physical intimacy that came with it.

“Thank you so much, Father,” Ryna offered with a pleased smile, beaming with delight.

He nodded as he took a draw from his wine, “And I will make a point to announce the betrothal tomorrow at council,” Viserys added, finally putting a timetable to their plans. “We’ll make arrangements for the wedding immediately. A sennight long celebration will do nicely. I wish for the entire realm to take notice… To participate in our family’s good fortune.”

There was a warble of discussion around the table as everyone reacted to the news. Ryna was sure most of her relatives hadn’t expected them to make it through their courtship without scandal, did not think Daemon capable of behaving himself. While he had not been a total gentleman when they were alone together, he’d made every effort to appear upstanding in public.

She couldn’t help but notice how disturbed Rhaenyra appeared, wearing an expression of confused scorn. Ryna wondered if her sister would cause another outburst as she had the first time her betrothal to Daemon had been discussed. She was surprised when it was Alicent who spoke up first.

“Why not hold a tourny, Your Grace?” she suggested with a level of enthusiasm that sounded unnatural. “Let the lords and knights of the realm congregate for the wedding.”

The king nodded slightly, mulling over the idea before replying. “A tourny… That is an excellent idea, my love. A week of games, drinking and carousing! What better way to bring the realm together to celebrate my daughter’s wedding?”

Rhaenyra appeared completely affronted, likely wondering how Ryna, the poorly second daughter had somehow afforded the same lavish celebration she and Laenor had been given. Ryna tried to repress the grin tugging at the corners of her lips, imagining how her eldest sister would be forced to endure an entire seven days of Daemon and she being the center of attention. It would be insufferable for the heir and Ryna would enjoy every moment of it.

She looked to her newly betrothed and could see the excitement dancing in his features. “Perhaps I’ll have to show everyone that I am still the greatest warrior in the Seven Kingdoms, hm?” Daemon smirked, unable to keep from gloating about his combat prowess.

“Yes, I thought Daemon might enjoy participating,” Alicent replied with an all too sweet smile. It was not a genuine notion, but laced with ill intent. Ryna found she didn’t like the possible implications of it.

Viserys happily nodded along, his excitement palpable. “Yes! We’ll have a royal tournament,” he said decidedly. “And I’ll invite the most famed warriors in the realm to make it a proper challenge for you, Brother.”

Daemon chuckled softly in response, “In truth, I would relish the chance to demonstrate my superior skills once more. It has been too long since I’ve had a good joust.” He turned to gaze at Ryna, his eyes sparkling with mischief and his tone low and flirtatious. “What say you, sweetling? Will you be my little princess cheering me on from the stands?”

Ryna felt her cheeks get heated at the smooth intonation of his voice. It was ridiculous what an effect he still had on her after all of this time. “Y-yes,” she finally managed to utter, trying to ignore the sting of embarrassment. “I shall be your staunchest supporter, Uncle.”

“What an obedient wife you’ll make, riñitsos,” his countenance became more predatory in nature, his hand firmly traveling up her thigh as he spoke. “Imagine having such a charming girl cheering for me. I have no doubt that your encouragement will carry me to victory.” He flashed a cocky smile at her, his arrogance plain for all to see.

Viserys let out a deep bellow of laughter, shaking his head as Daemon fawned over Ryna. “Your wife will no doubt have her work cut out for her in trying to keep you humble.”

“I don’t think I shall try, Father,” Ryna offered up playfully with a small laugh. “I rather like that about him.”

“No doubt you’ll spoil him, Daughter,” he said almost regretfully as he took another swig of his chalice. “And make him all the more intolerable for the rest of us.”

Alicent chimed in next, taking the opportunity to make a well-aimed jab at the prince. “I don’t know if it’s even feasibly possible for Daemon to become any more insufferable than he already is.” She smiled brightly when she was done, but let it be said that the queen always made her feelings known in one way or another. Aegon snickered to himself in amusement at his mother’s comment, but did not add anything to the discussion.

“Please, Good-mother,” Ryna interjected before Daemon could snap back at her. She could already see the sneer twisting his features at Alicent’s nasty little quip. “The prince can most assuredly back up his claims, being one of the few men to know war during Father’s historic reign of peace.”

“Oh yes, one of the few,” the queen replied smugly, clearly unimpressed by Daemon’s achievements in the Stepstones.

Daemon’s eyes rolled before he schooled his expression to one of of stoicism. He was just about to open his mouth when Viserys interrupted him, no doubt sensing the growing tension.

“Now, now,” the king attempted to placate the two of them. “This is no time for arguing. We should be celebrating. I’ll have no more of these petty japes.”

“I agree with Father,” Ryna insisted in an upbeat manner. “After all, we shall be wed soon and have all that we had hoped for. Right, Daemon?” she looked to him, the message written in between the lines to not fall for such baited tactics.

The prince gave her a half-smile, reaching to take her hand in his. “Yes, sweetling,” he agreed with a kiss to the back of her knuckles. “No need to spoil the mood with needless bickering.”

“Very well,” Viserys declared as he stood, signaling the end of supper. “I’m off to my chambers now. I have much to consider for the preparations,” he mumbled more to himself than to anyone else.

Daemon joined him in standing, pulling out Ryna’s chair and helping her to her feet. “We shall take our leave as well, Brother. Good night.”

Viserys nodded cheerfully and then added with a note of surprise, as if just remembering something. “Oh, and Ryna, my dear, tomorrow you will be fitted for your dress. I want to make sure it’s prepared in time for the wedding, so we must get an early start.”

“As you wish, Father. Thank you,” Ryna bowed graciously in appreciation. She watched on as the queen joined him in retiring from the dining hall and the rest of the family began to stroll out at a leisurely pace from the table. All was orderly, aside from the children who shuffled this way and that, some chasing each other on their way out.

As the last of the stragglers cleared the room, Daemon wrapped his arm around Ryna’s waist and pulled her roughly against him. His lips lingered closely to her own as his eyes roved over her face. The prince’s other hand lifted to her chin, tilting it up so her eyes were fixed on his. “Alone at least, sweetling,” he murmured, his gaze hungry and full of promise.

Ryna’s cheeks flushed pink at the feel of his hot breath against her lips, tempting her will to resist him in such an open space. She wondered if anyone would even mind a mild impropriety now that they were officially engaged to wed. Would a stolen kiss be that horrible?

She looked around briefly, noticing only two of the serving staff busy at clearing the table. “Kiss me then,” she whispered coquettishly as she looked into his amethyst eyes.

Daemon smirked as he leaned in, “As you wish, Princess.” He moved to cover her lips, kissing her firmly. Parting her lips with his tongue, he delved into her mouth quickly turning up the heat of their embrace. He held her close to him, his grasp on her greedy and protective all at once.

When they finally parted for air, he gazed down at Ryna, his tone huskier than usual, “You taste so bloody good…” His nose grazed the soft skin of her neck as he began to press kisses down the column of her throat. “I can’t believe you will soon be mine. Finally. It has been such a fucking tortuously long wait.”

“We’ve made due,” she said almost teasingly as her hand slid around his waist and they began to walk from the dining hall, out through the side doors.

“Hardly,” the prince countered with a huff, his hand still fastened to her hip. “But that will all change once we are finally wed. I will have you all to myself whenever the mood strikes me. I fear I won’t let you out of my bed for a fortnight.”

“I will hold you to that,” Ryna giggled, imagining what it might be like to retire to their newly shared chambers and make all the noise they wished. How wonderful it would be to not have to sneak around, always worrying that they might be caught and their wedding called off.

It would be a pleasant change, but something was still bothering her about Alicent. She kept thinking of that maliciously, happy smile and how she even went as far as to insult the her affianced at the very announcement of his wedding. She made it no secret that she loathed Daemon, but the queen usually presented herself with more decorum, especially in the presence of Ryna’s father.

“I don’t trust Alicent,” she voiced her concerns out loud. “Why would she suggest a tourny, something you’d so obviously enjoy, when she despises you and the thought of us being wed? I feel as though she’s up to something, but I’m not sure what.”

Daemon gave a snort of derisive laugher as the queen’s name fell from Ryna’s lips. “She is a snake, my sweet. One who hides her fangs quite well, but when it comes to me, she has always made her distaste known openly.”

“What if she plans to have you harmed at the tourny?” It suddenly made sense. Alicent would never do the dirty work herself, but she might hire someone else to do it for her. What better way to get rid of Daemon than at a tourny where violence and strife already ran amok. “Would she really be willing to go that far?” she mused anxiously.

“Perhaps,” Daemon considered it for a moment, a playful smirk dancing on his lips. “I wouldn’t put it past her, but I can handle myself. It would not be the first time someone has tried to take my life.” He pulled Ryna to a halt mid-step, peering at her with his keen violet eyes.

“Are you worried for me, riñītsos?” he teased with an arched eyebrow. “Or is there something else on your mind? Why the sudden concern on my behalf?”

“I just… I know Alicent had hoped I might wed Aegon instead,” she bit at the nail of her index finger nervously. “What if she plans to kill you so that she might see her son’s claim to the throne solidified.”

The prince gave an amused smirk, his hand lifting to caress her cheek. “Why sweetling,” he whispered, his voice dripping with affectionate mockery. “You truly care for me, hm? I’m touched.”

He leaned in closely, his lips brushing down the curve of her ear. “But don’t worry your pretty little head,” he reassured her softly, before pausing to nip at her lobe. “I’ve survived much worse than that green bitch’s scheming.”

A shiver ran down her neck, causing her skin to erupt into fresh goosebumps. It was true that Daemon had likely been through much worse, but had anyone actually tried to kill him in an underhanded way before? Or had it always been a direct bout of brutality and violence?

She sighed, knowing she must relent the fear lest it absorb her completely. Ryna had to have faith in what she knew to be true. She’d seen it in her mind’s eye so many years ago, that she and Daemon would end up together no matter what. And what if her very fretting somehow caused harm to befall him.

“You’re right,” she finally acquiesced, leaning against him affectionately.

Daemon hummed against her skin, his hand pushing her long silvery gold curls aside to expose her neck. “Of course I am,” he said, sounding pleased with himself for allaying her fears. He pulled back, observing her as if to make sure she had no second guesses about it.

“I have to retire to my chambers soon,” she sighed, running her fingers along the scratchy fabric of his doublet. My handmaid will be waiting to start my bath. But perhaps we can meet up tomorrow since it is already so late?”

“Nonsense,” he rebuffed her immediately. “I would spend this night with you. I can come to your room again,” his voice low and seductive once more. “Or you can meet me in the Godswood in our usual spot.”

She smiled, recalling the many times they’d settled on the backside of the heart tree, milling away the hours just kissing. “I wouldn’t mind getting a look at the stars tonight.”

He laughed darkly, twisting a ringlet of her hair around his fingers. “You just want to see the stars?” he teased, the lust already stirring in his eyes. “Or are you using it as an excuse to get your hands on me, sweetling?”

Ryna rolled her eyes, but could not control the blush in her cheeks that seemed to always rear up whenever he toyed with her like this. “I will slip away if possible. Ser Erryk has not been at watch beside my door come nightfall as of late. I think maybe Father has given up the ghost.”

“If you aren’t in my arms by the hour of the bat, then I will come and fetch you myself,” he tilted down, pressing his lips against her forehead as his hand raked up the nape of her neck. “Don’t tarry,” he added for good measure as he relinquished his hold on Ryna.

“I’ll be with you as soon as I can be, Uncle,” she smiled sweetly as she turned to head back to her room.

The worry of her Good-mother’s plottings was already fading as she considered a reprieve from prying eyes, alone with her husband-to-be. She couldn’t help but squeal a happy sound of delight as she made for the stairs. Everything was going so perfectly and within a time frame quicker than she had imagined possible. Ryna grinned from ear to ear thinking of the coming celebration and how everyone in the realms would gather to wish her and Daemon well on their wedding. It was a dream come true.

She entered her room in a lovesick haze, her feet light as though in step to a dance and not merely to move from one place to another. Her handmaid struggled to untie the laces on her gown as she swayed from side to side, humming a merry tune she remembered her wet nurse singing to her when she was just a child.

Even as she settled into the warm water of the bath, the divinity of love and untasted passions welled in her chest, heavy like the very meaning of life itself.

Read Chapter 9

[azullumi]

ayato, diluc, childe + alhaitham — playing horror games ☆彡

summary — you invited him to play a horror game with you to which he accepted. now, what will your experience with him will be?

characters — ayato, diluc, childe + alhaitham (w/ gender neutral reader)

tags — fluff, modern, multiple mentions of the word "game"; headcanons

word count — 1225

a/n — i hate the amount of times i used the word game because i couldn't find another word for it. nevertheless, enjoy!

KAMISATO AYATO

Apparently, there was a new game released and it captured the hearts of horror-games enthusiasts and you wanted to try it out, however, the game is hard to clear on your own so you had invited Ayato.

A horror game? Sure, he doesn't mind. He has played a few ones with his sister and Thoma before and it's been a long time since the last time he went through one. 

At first, he's interested and curious but then when he starts playing, there's just confusion. He's just confused, not in a confused type wherein he doesn’t know what to do throughout the game but the type wherein he doesn’t know what is happening and is unaware of the events of the game. Are horror games really like this? As far as he can remember, these are supposed to be much scarier and frightening.

“Oh… Was that a jumpscare?”

He’s bored not until he witnessed your reactions so instead of focusing more on the game, his attention and eyes are all on you. He wants to see more of it so he purposely fails some parts of the game so you two could restart and have to go through it all again. Witnessing the change in your expressions and seeing the way you react is honestly so entertaining for him. Mans out here living the best life while you’re suffering.

Eventually, you’ll notice it. How he intentionally fails and suddenly becomes a bad player once you two get through the extreme parts. It took you quite some time to see through his tricks as you weren’t thinking much about it, however, he doesn’t admit it easily and will probably never do so.

“Are you trying to lose on purpose?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking abou— Ah, I died again. Looks like we’ll have to restart.”

DILUC RAGNVINDR

It doesn't take much persuading just to get him to play a game— a horror one to be exact— with you. He doesn’t mind it anyways and it’s not like he’s the type to get scared easily. It’s just some simple game with some scary components embedded in it.

At first, it was dead silence. You don’t know if he’s scared or just focused on clearing the game. However, the answer was the latter as he is unfazed by the jumpscares of the game and was more focused on the objectives. While you’re out there getting startled at every noise, whether loud or not, he’s focused on solving the puzzles and determining how to attain victory.

He guides you on what to do and even encourages you so that you won’t be scared. He doesn’t leave you behind and if ever you die at some part and you two have to restart, he’ll just say it’s okay and you two won’t have a hard time playing through it as you already know what you’re supposed to do. He’s honestly so sweet and gentle while playing and it just eases your mind knowing that you can rely on him.

“Are you scared? Come closer.”

“It’s okay, you can do this.”

He’ll let you lean on him though or hide yourself behind him. You’ll often block your point of view by using his arms as a cover whenever you feel like something scary will pop up on your screen and he will just let you be, looking at you with a soft smile on his face. He knows this isn’t the time for that but he just can’t help but think how adorable you are when you’re scared.

“You can open your eyes now, there’s no more jumpscare.”

Truly a reliable teammate.

CHILDE

He's the chatty type of person while playing, would often say remarks filled with confidence and would reassure you that you just have to follow him from behind and he can finish the game in no time. He's so confident and sure of himself that when you two started playing, you were relaxed because of the things he had said. God, you wish you didn't believe him.

He's the type to treat the game like it's some sort of comedy show and would laugh at certain elements of the game that are supposed to be scary. He makes fun of the “ghosts” and would challenge them to scare him. However, once he really gets to the jumpscare and intense parts, he becomes silent.

Then he goes back to being the normal chatty person that he is. He doesn't want to admit the fact that he is scared, especially after all that talk he did. He’ll convince you that he isn’t frightened at all and would attempt to regain his composure. It’s honestly cute how he tries his best to look strong and reliable.

You can’t help but tease him while playing, saying things that will scare him. Poke him for a bit and he suddenly jumps startled which also scares you.

"Archons above, (Name)! You just can't do that!"

"I just poked you."

After finishing the game, he'll just laugh and say, "that's all?" before asking you to watch a movie with him next. However, you shook your head and showed him the next game that you two are going to play and unfortunately for him, it’s a horror one again and it was a continuation of the previous one. He doesn’t have any choice but to play it with you.

“Don’t worry, if you’re too scared, you can cling to me.”

“Shut up.”

ALHAITHAM

He doesn't see the sense of even willingly playing horror games despite the fact that you'll just get scared, nevertheless, he still plays with you because why not. It’s not like he’ll die if he did. Maybe he'll end up seeing something interesting or maybe he just wants to see how you’ll react.

He’s the type to tease you by suddenly scaring you in tense and terrifying parts of the game then pretends that he didn’t do anything. At these times, the thought of how Alhaitham can be a little shit goes through your head and if you weren’t that scared right now and not leaning on him and using him as some sort of cover, you would have smacked him right on the head.

He’s expressionless, he’s unaffected by the horror factors of the game and would just continue on like nothing happened.

“It’s not that scary, (Name). It’s just a mannequin.”

“Look, there’s nothing terrifying here. It’s just the wind.”

You don’t know if you should be thankful for his comments because it was helping you to replace your fear with irritation. However, you can’t get mad at him because Alhaitham… Alhaitham was extremely helpful in clearing the game especially on the hardest parts and would tell you what you should do to avoid having to restart. Sometimes, he’ll throw in some words of encouragement here and there to further encourage you.

Despite the small yet constant bickerings and teasings, it didn’t take you long to finish the game. He thinks it was boring but if you were going to invite him to another one, he won't complain nor even hesitate in joining you. 

“Let’s play another one.”

“Aren’t you scared already from the one we just played?”

He still doesn’t understand how you still want to play these games knowing the fact that you’ll just be frightened the whole time you’re playing though.

— navigation | masterlist

[letterstoear]

For you from me

Notes: A letter from Leona in which he's concerned about you, Leona x reader, can be read as either platonic or romantic, mentions of Ruggie and Jack, reader is from Savanaclaw,

Check out my shop here: Shop — Letters to Ear (squarespace.com)

Little herbivore,

There was a boy who long ago chased a world where he could rule on even land. Now that very boy has eyes full of dust yet is clinging onto that hope of even land. Tell me could you find that child for me? Although it would be nearly impossible, he doesn’t exist anymore. That boy punched his way through the world till it spat him back out. Still, he chose hope. The hope that he could be the one to create that even land, so why hope? Tell me what is the use of hope? What drives one to believe in it?

To me it’s nothing better than a double edge sword. Hope. Can’t say I haven’t believed in it before. Do you want me to go on and on about myself now or should I get straight to the point. No, I think I’ll torture you with a little more about myself. You’ll have to listen to my selfish thoughts for longer than you would like.

When you screamed into my face after I overblotted, I wasn’t expecting you to start crying at the end. You said I made you miserable, you proceed to blame me and cry. Tears ran down your face as you told me to keep going. Despite knowing my flaws, you wanted me to keep going even if I couldn’t attain what I wanted. Never quite understood your foolish actions at that point. Hate to say that I understand your feelings well now. Miss the days where I could blindly ignore the problem. _________, I’m going to push you in the same way you pushed me. No, I’m going to give you hope. Latch onto that slimmer of hope and get better you goddamn herbivore.

Everyone knows you’ve been sobbing around the whole dorm with every chance you get. Did you forget I’m your dorm leader? It’s a job of mine to be aware of what goes on around Savanaclaw. Right now, there’s no telling what’s been going on in that thick head of yours. Only thing I do know is that you need a little push to move forward. I get it, moving forward feels impossible when even the slightest movement is tough. I get it, really, I do. However, who was it that told me I needed to move forward? _______, show me or was all that just some bark?

Listen, I’m not going to demand you to cough everything up, at least not for now. We can work at your pace or if you prefer, we can move right along to Ruggie’s plan. Can’t say, I truly mind which one you pick. Even got poor Jack worried. He might not admit it, but it’s painfully obvious with the way his tail is tucked. At the end of the day, all I want is for your improvement. _______, do you understand? This is no laughing matter; the whole dorm is worried. We need you back on your feet. I need you back on your feet. I hope this was enough for you, if not, we’ll really have to move onto Ruggie’s plan.

Your Dorm Leader,

Leona Kingscholar

[softichill]

The Sounds of Nightmares unofficial transcript

Chapter 2 - A Penance at the Bathouse

(created in collaboration with @queen0fm0nsterz !!!!!!)

Chapter 1

-------------

[Click]

[Rewind sound]

OTTO: During our fourth session, developments in Noone’s case unearthed echoes of past failures. The girl recalled a familiar figure. 

[Click, Otto plays the tape]

Recording of NOONE: “The Candleman stood before me, on the rooftop. He wore… a long filthy jacket. His presence… it reminded me of… when the tide goes out.”

[Click, Otto pauses the tape]

OTTO: An uncanny sense of deja-vu, for Noone has seemingly encountered my Cici’s [distorted] Ferryman. I thought him lost forever. Yet, if true, he’s somehow found a way back to where he began. And who is he? Some deranged bedlamite? A mutual dreaming savant, invading the nightmares of innocents? It seems absurd. All I know for certain is that I must dig deeper. 

[tape rewinding]

[Intro plays]

[Various clicking]

OTTO: This is the Counselor, tape number 57, session number 4, patient number… Hm, patient Noone. [Tapping and shifting]

OTTO: I was presumptuous. Judgemental. Now I feel it’s paramount to prioritize Noone’s treatment over several other cases, due to demonstration of abnormal neurological faculties. [Shifting sounds] To dissent her further, today I’ll venture an unconventional method. [something electric is turned on]

[Beeping. Otto sighs]

OTTO: Admittedly dated, but this device should help attain further clarity. 

[Beeping alts. Audio cuts]

[Steps, pages shuffling. Someone knocks on the door]

OTTO: (cheery) Please, come in! 

[Door creaks open and closes]

OTTO: How are we doing today, Noone?

NOONE: Otto, what happens to a stone that has overcome its greatest fear? 

OTTO: You’re… telling a joke?

NOONE: Yes, but I never got the punchline.

OTTO: I’ll have to think about that –

NOONE: Hey, look! A moth!

[Otto shifts to look]

NOONE: We went on vacation once, under my doctor’s advice. Swarms of moths gathered around that balcony each night. They fascinated me, their little ways! How they just… existed. I collected them in mum’s plastic jars. 

OTTO: Well, this might be a good time to tell me about your mother. 

NOONE: …I’d rather not. Mum didn’t share my enthusiasms for crawlies. But moths were my favorite, drawn to light under some kind of spell.

OTTO: Perhaps you see a bit of yourself in the moth. Vulnerable, caught in the spotlight. The fame you received after the cure –

NOONE: I don’t feel cured. At all.

OTTO: …You feel you’re still in the dark?

NOONE: Yes. But I like to try to fly towards the light.

OTTO: [Hum] Then let me be that guiding light. And eventually, together, we’ll leave your darkness behind. 

NOONE: How you said that… reminds me of the place I visited.

OTTO: On your vacation?

NOONE: No. Last night, in my dream.

OTTO: Let’s make sure you’re comfortable before jumping in.

NOONE: Oh, I feel at ease. Calm even. Can I tell you about it?

OTTO: If you like, then I suppose you could –

NOONE, narrating: I awoke to wet air on a rooftop. 

NOONE: Peeking over the ledge, I saw an ocean, stretching all the way to the horizon. On the nearest shore, giant fish-like contraptions crawled out from the waves, and from their mouths, plump men and women emerged. Faces hidden behind wooden masks, bodies tucked away beneath mucky brown robes. Some used sticks to labour up the long winding boardwalk leading from the beach to the lantern-lit market below. 

[Bells and steps]

NOONE: Their destination was behind me. A distant, crooked bathhouse. A voice whispered, “Hey!��, and I turned to see a grubby, breathless boy stepping off a ladder. He dressed in tatty shorts and… shirt covered in pin badgers. He said, 

JESTER, overlapping with NOONE: “Do you know a way out of here?”

NOONE: I told him I was equally lost, but he insisted on traveling together. He went on,

JESTER, (ov. with NOONE): “Other kids call me Jester, because I never run out of jokes. I can tell you some along the way!” 

NOONE: I didn’t reply, so he blurted,

JESTER (ov. with NOONE): “Uhm, a man tells his friend to stop looking for the perfect match…” 

NOONE: But, he stopped. I could tell he realized that parts of him… were missing. As if… just being here… [slimy, crawling sound] was changing him. I realized something too: my headache was gone. Jester yelled out,

JESTER (ov. with NOONE): “Oh! He tells him to… use a lighter!”

[Otto interrupts the narration]

OTTO: Then this boy was the impetus for your joke! [Shifting] You met a child in your nightmare prior, but this one sounds far more… normal. 

NOONE: He looked like the kids from school, only… kinder. The ones at school teased me. Well, until I fell ill. After the water sickness, the same children who made me dread walking through these rotten gates began sucking up. But I’ve always been the same me. 

NOONE: Funny. I feel less me now than before.

OTTO: Children can be cruel. I had my share of tormentors in adolescence. 

NOONE: Really?

OTTO: It’s regrettably common. [Shifting] Tell me what happened next.

NOONE, narrating: Jester pulled my arm. “Look”, he said, pointing me to long planks of wood laid down like bridges between the rooftops. …Other children had traveled this path before.

OTTO: Other children? [Otto writing]

NOONE: The walkways had been placed there. They were too narrow for those swollen adults below. It must have been other children, and Jester – he was real too. [Writing] I felt his presence just as I feel yours here in this room. [Pause] Could that… be the dream sharing you spoke of?

OTTO: Let’s not leap to assumptions. Go on. The planks?

[Pause. Sounds of slow steps on wood]

NOONE, narrating:  We carefully walked each one, building to building. [Steps on terrain and wood, as well as faint bells] Below, the masked figures continued their walk too. Every now and then, a traveler would leave their place in line to take goods from the many merchants who’d offered all manner of soaps and perfumes. Their flowery smells mixed with… the fishy stench, pouring from the chimneys of the bathhouse…

[walking and bells continue]

NOONE: When we reached our final building, our only option was to head down the long ladder, sneaking around the side into an alleyway below. Jester was the nervous sort, so, I did my best to stir his courage and asked, [overlapping] “Have you another joke?”, and he replied,

JESTER (ov. with NOONE): “Oh, right! What happens to a stone that has overcome its greatest fear?”

NOONE: And there it was again. That… lost look. Like granny used to get. I asked him, [overlapping] “You don’t remember?” And Jester simply said,

JESTER (ov. with NOONE): “I’ll know it by the time I reach the bottom.”

NOONE: But, before I could follow… something called out from across the rooftop. A muddled voice, and then… I saw him. That man with- the impossible face. The same one from the room of glass jars, the – I can never focus on him!

[Narration stops]

OTTO: Noone, I need you to recall fine details.

NOONE: I told you!

OTTO: Especially when speaking of persons you’ve seen multiple times. Recurrence implies significance. 

NOONE: He’s a… broken mirror. Or a photograph all torn up. Impossible to piece back together.

OTTO: I have something. [Otto gets up from his chair, steps] A magic glue for your mind. 

[Steps, shifting, Otto sets the device up. Beeping and buzzing.]

NOONE: I don’t want to wear that.

OTTO: (immediately) You must. If you cannot remember specifics then I cannot help you. I must know about this mystery figure, I… simply must. 

[Shifting]

NOONE: Um… Alright then. 

[Noone puts on the device. Everything except Noone’s voice becomes slightly muffled]

NOONE: [pause] A pendant?

OTTO: This belonged to someone very important. Gazing into its spiral always gave me relief. I found it can be used to offer my patients that same relief through hypnotherapy… which will help you remember this, um…

NOONE: The Candleman. It’s my name for him.

[Shifting]

OTTO: I’d like you to gaze into the spiral. Watch it sway, back and forth. Back, and forth. Fall into the endless turning of the pattern within. As you drift away, drift back into dreaming. Drift into a world coming clearer. 

NOONE: Y-Yes… I see.

OTTO: Then, tell me of… the Candleman. 

NOONE, narrating: …The candleman stood before me. On the rooftop. [Faint, low breathing] He wore… a long filthy jacket. His presence…. it reminded me of… when the tide goes out. And his face… it moved beneath his hat. Like soup. Bits and pieces rising and sinking. Wait… I can see a little better now. 

NOONE: H-His eyes… are long slits. Skin-rough, sagging… like melting wax. He didn’t speak, but somehow I knew. The Candleman wanted me to open myself. To this place. Yes, he has for a while now. Every night. 

OTTO: (muffled) Every night?

NOONE: Oh. I can see it all. A web. He’s… been with me this whole time. Watching. Observing. Waiting…

OTTO: What does he want?

NOONE: I don’t know… [muffled yelling] Someone shouting. I turn to look,

OTTO: I’d like to keep talking about-

NOONE: No! When I turn back, the Candleman was gone. I-I rush to the ladder [Dream!Noone running, clunk]. At the bottom stood a- wart-covered brute with filthy arms. He must have broken away from the boardwalk, and something hung in his hand, flapping l-like a fish. He headed to the Bathhouse and… something told me to follow. 

[clanking]

NOONE: As I climb down the ladder, I passed by an open shop window, and poked my head inside. The merchant… spoke in- a raspy voice, [overlapping] “What’s your pleasure?” A desperate moan came from the customer, and he said [overlapping whisper] “Suds. To cleanse this profound skin.” And then… the merchant lifted- a bottle of pink liquid, and said “This will ease your pain.”

[Dream!Noone continues climbing down, lands]

NOONE: A-at the bottom of the ladder, Jester wasn’t there, so… I set off, making my way through- the overgrowth, that had eaten up the land around the Bathhouse.

[plants rustling] 

NOONE: Until, I reached some vines, crawling up a fogged window. 

[Window being opened, Dream!Noone entering and landing on the floor]

NOONE: I was in some kind of- store closet. [water dripping] The shelves were lined with… cleaning chemicals, and… brushes and buckets. The stink of bleach stung my eyes, so I rush through the door. 

[heavy door opening, echoey bath splashing]

NOONE: A room with shallow pools. And the same polluted taste in the air, as the stream by our apartment. 

OTTO: [writing, muffled] Water parasite preoccupation-

NOONE, Not narrating: (distressed) Something lives on. Even after the cure! Pinching my skin, pulling my organs, my head’s like- cracked pavement and my scalp is- itchy!- So itchy- urgh!!!

OTTO: Enough! Enough scratching. 

[Beeping, clicking as Otto unstraps the device. Beeping powers down, audio is clearer]

OTTO: (comforting) Noone, listen. There’s nothing on you. Nothing inside, either. It’s only you and me, and nothing else. 

[Two pops. Earplugs are removed, Noone gasps, audio is completely clear]

OTTO: It’s alright. You’re back. Safe and sound, as promised. 

NOONE: …Did…did it work? Were details glued back together?

OTTO: Some. Though many pieces are still missing… and this continual mention of headaches concerns me. I’ll look into possible causes and see what can be done. For now; the Bathhouse, you were inside, right?

NOONE, narrating: Yes. And, there was steam hung in the air, making it hard to see anything but… shapes. The shapes of… Bathers, unrobed and- unmasked. Some levered away, some crouched in the water, others huffed the sauna steam. The biggest… sat scrubbing himself with… [child struggling] with something that appeared alive. 

[distant splash, more struggling noises, scrubbing]

NOONE: Creeping through the steam, I hid behind a bucket [splash, child whines, growly mumbling] The big one… was before me, [Child yelling, growly voice] barely resembling a human. His- body was… raw and brown, and he rapidly repeated “Divide the grime from the divine” over and over. I suddenly realized wha- [splash, Jester struggling] who… the creature was scrubbing with.

NOONE: [Jester yells, scrubbing] It was poor Jester, sobbing and thrashing for his life. S-Stumbling in horror, I… I slipped on the slimey [squeak] tile and-

[all background noise stops]

NOONE: The whole room went silent, as they turned their heads… and began a haunting chant.

NOONE: (overlapping whisper) “Cleanse her, cleanse her!” Voices piled as their shapes stood and staggered into view, th-their bodies scrubbed into- raw spectacles, there was nothing I could do for Jester! So, I- I picked myself up, and ran for the door, but it was shut tight! [door clicking, whispers get louder] The Bathers drew near, arms reaching out, [more struggling] my hands grazed a crevice on the wall, which- which I slip- through just in time. 

[Whispers stop, door clattering, Dream!Noone breathing hard]

NOONE: There I stood in the storeroom, once more. The window was open [knocks on the door]- my one chance to escape. I climbed the shelves, [jars clinking] avoiding the jars and containers that filled the room with chemical stink. 

[knock, door breaks down]

NOONE: Glancing back, I saw the monster, standing in the broken door frame- Jester’s limp body under his arm. 

[clanking]

NOONE: His… wart-covered hand reached up, [Growl, Dream!Noone yelps] grabbing my leg, violently pulling me away, [shelf creaks] and all I could do was reach in hope, [creak] my hands grasped a jar full of white liquid, [creak, yelp] and as he ripped me down-

[Entire shelf breaks]

NOONE: The jar followed. 

[Glass breaks, Bather roars & groans. Everything goes quiet]

NOONE: The liquid covered him, head to toe, unleashing a cloud of gas that burned the very air, washing over me, sending me into darkness. …A strange satisfaction came from melting down that vile man. I wasn’t like that moth, searching for the light. I was quite… happy, surrounded by the dark. 

NOONE, finishing: Soon enough… I was back here. In the Copy. 

OTTO: …Hmm… A more intense, personally-rooted conflict this time, a desire to be clean- perhaps to wash away memories of an invasive experience that your anxiety is fixated on. Yet, what bemuses me is your insistence on actuality; claiming material presence of others, and environment. 

NOONE: But, didn’t you say I could be sharing dreams?

OTTO: Yes, but that’s a different phenomenon. We must prescribe further research. I will need to begin nightly tests and observations to aid in reaching differential diagnosis. 

NOONE: Experiments! Do we have to, Otto?

OTTO: They’ll help you feel better! And that’s what you want, isn’t it?

NOONE: …Well… yes. Of all things, it’s the sound of mum saying “Ni-night” I miss most. 

[shifting as both get up]

OTTO: The stone becomes a little boulder!

NOONE: Pardon?

OTTO: The answer! To Jester’s joke! It’s an old one. 

NOONE: (whispering) The stone becomes a little boul… Oh, [giggle]

OTTO: Now, before you pop off to bed, [ceramic scrape] pick out another colorful delight for being such a good girl. 

[ceramic click, wrapper crinkling]

OTTO: Sweets, for my sweet. 

[Click]

[Outro plays] 

[psychic-refugee]

I do Tarot for fun, and I did a little reading for Percy. Obviously I do not know Percy and it’s not a personal reading for him, this was to entertain myself.

Upright King of Swords: This card appearing in a reading suggests that you should remain objective in your current situation - you must establish truth by sticking to the facts. The King of Swords and his intellectual power implies that you will need to use your intellect to make your point known and attain your goals. Besides your experience and education, you should be sharp and observant, to see deeply into problems that come your way.

I think Percy has shown a calm and collected head through the past several years. I read this as him being steadfast in the truth and always kept a rational mind when people let emotion and ignorance dictate their actions. He has never lost his temper, he has never deviated from his own statements, and he moved on when people wanted chaos and anger.

Ace of Pentacles: In this card, there is a single mysterious hand that comes out of the clouds. In the hand is what looks like a gold coin with a pentagram engraved on its surface. This pentacle is associated with the element of earth, and seen as a sign of wealth and all things material and earthly. Below the hand is a garden which appears to be flourishing with flowers and other kinds of vegetation - giving off the aura of fertility, growth and prosperity. The mountain represents the ambition required to drive one's search for the pentacle. The flowing creek seem to indicate that emotions are flowing towards this ambition.

This is the present and I think Percy has more than shown he is flourishing. He lives his life and has not stumbled or let anything deter him from his goals. He travels and he’s been working. I think we’ll continue to see the same for him.

Because of his past steadfastness with the King of Swords, I think people see his work ethic and his true self. Internet noise has not broken him, and he’ll be rewarded in kind.

Two of Pentacles: This card depicts a man who is dancing as he is juggling two large coins. The pentacles are surrounded by the infinity sign that denotes that the person can handle all the issues the come his way and he can manage his life with grace. In the background, you will notice that there are two ships that are riding the giant waves, and they reinforce the balancing act that the man has to face - he is in rough and choppy waters, but manages to stay afloat. The Two of Pentacles depicts the usual ups and downs that occur in one’s life. Despite all the chaos that surrounds him, the man lives a very carefree life as he dances, and handles all that comes to him with joy.

This is Percy’s future. I think he will see abundance for his hard work and talent, so much that he’ll need to keep balance and not over-commit himself.  

Again while there is internet noise in the background, he can't hear it over living his best life.

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Chaos Is Among Us

Pairings: Eclipse/Polar, Kill Code/Glamrock Freddy, Lunar/Mini Music Man, Sun/Foxy (pre-relationship)

Word Cound: 1,155 Words

Summary: Unintentional bonding and the unholy act.

Warnings: Innuendo (mentioned) Sex (mentioned only), Creep (mentioned), Caps, Cursing, Death (mentioned only), Vomitting (mentioned only), let me know if I should add anything else.

Chapter 3: The Horrors

3:40am

Why Is This My Family?

Blood Moon: Why are both Mama and Dad and Peepaw’s rooms making loud noises?

Harvest Moon: Hey, @Moon, can we come over and visit? Maybe help with Plex patrol even?

Moon: Yeah, sure come on little ducklings.

Solar Flare: Thank you, my god that was awkward.

Moon: Why not just bang on the walls and tell them to keep it down?

Harvest Moon: Because that might involve telling Blood Moon what they’re doing.

Solar Flare: Yeah, and Blood Moon is the only one left with some kinda innocence and we don’t want to get rid of what’s left of it.

Moon: Makes sense. Just don’t go in Lunar’s room. He has Mini over. Mini is getting the railing of a lifetime.

Harvest Moon: Are all of you adults just sinners?

Moon: No, I’m asexual.

Solar Flare: No, you just commit crimes instead.

Moon: You got me there. But still. Sunny literally went out for ice cream and hasn’t come back for three hours now since I started my patrol. It’s quite funny, honestly.

Lunar: We’ve been done for a half hour, idiots.

Blood Moon: Done with what?

Lunar: Making loud noises. Yeah, it’s a game to see how loud you can be and Mini was winning. We played for two and a half hours and Mini still won.

Blood Moon: Ooh, is that the game Mama and Dad and Peepaw and Freddy are playing?

Moon: …Yes.

Sun: Wait, I can come home now without hearing the sound of the unholy?

Lunar: Yes, Sun.

Sun: Finally, I can stop hiding in Gator Golf.

Moon: Why are you bugging Monty? Are you two dating in secret or something?

Sun: What? No! Never! Monty and I are friends and he let me crash here to avoid Lunar and Mini Music Man’s unholiness. If anyone, I’m interested in Foxy.

Moon: You mean the guy who hit on me? That ancient little fleabag?

Sun: The very same.

Moon: Okay, who replaced Sun with a copy that’s completely lost its mind?

Lunar: Not it, I was busy.

Sun: Come on, his memory got reset, he doesn’t even remember hitting on you. And the new suit he got makes him much less of an ‘ancient little fleabag’.

Moon: I hate this family and I hate existing.

Harvest Moon: At least you’ve got your three ducklings free of sin, Uncle Moon.

Moon: Yeah fine, I’ll live for the ducklings.

Blood Moon: Can I be the cute duckling with a pink bow on my head?

Moon: Yeah, kid, we’ll get you a pink bow for your hair.

Sun: I have a box full of bows, c’mere kid.

Moon: Sun, that is the most creepy sentence you have ever written and I was there when you said ‘who wants candy until your parents come for pickup’. Please rethink your grammar choices.

Sun: LISTEN

Moon: NO

Sun: I’m allowed to spoil my grand-niece!

Moon: Not at the cost of sounding like a creepy uncle at a barbecue!

Blood Moon: Uncle Sunny, I’m here. Can I have my bow?

Sun: Yes, Blood Moon. I have a pretty pink one.

Sun: bloodmoonwithabowinherhair.jpg

Sun: Sending her back to you, Mama Duck Moon.

Moon: Hate that. Thanks.

Blood Moon: I GOT A BOW!

Solar Flare: It’s very pretty, sister.

Harvest Moon: You look adorable, twin.

Lunar: Ya look cute.

6:48am

Why Is This My Family?

Moon: @Eclipse @Polar I kidnapped your kids. This is a random note. I require coffee and bagels in exchange for the safe return of your kids that are all sleeping on me.

Eclipse: Oh shit.

Polar: Yeah, yeah, we’ll be over in an hour to collect the kids.

Kill Code: Oh my god, we scared the kids out of the house!

Lunar: Yeaaaaaah hearing your Mom and Grandpa getting railed does that. They’re safe, I’m currently taking pictures of Moon being trapped under your kids.

Eclipse: My god, they’re gonna need therapy.

Polar: We have attained coffee and bagels. We’re on our way up.

Kill Code: I’m on my way too.

Moon: Good, I’m getting lethargic you being out of my body so long.

Kill Code: I’m sorry!

Moon: Finally, hate you.

Kill Code: Listen, I forgot I wasn’t supposed to fall asleep! I was tired! I had my back blown out!

Moon: I don’t want to know this information.

Sun: Y’all are cursed. Your whole family is cursed. The adults at least.

Polar: I have acquired my daughter and sons, that’s all I care about.

2:25pm

Why Is This My Family?

Lunar: mynamespeteandilikejugsimmentallyillandimondrugs.gif

Moon: Lunar, that is so random, what?

Lunar: My therapist said I have something called ‘hd tv’.

Moon: …

Moon: You mean ‘adhd’?

Lunar: Yes, that’s the word! See, I wasn’t listening to Dr. Sheph again, I was zoning out thinking about the Saw movies again.

Moon: Lunar?

Lunar: Yes?

Moon: Listen to Dr. Sheph.

Lunar: Aw. Fine. But I’m still gonna talk about Saw during my therapy sessions and he can’t do nothing about it!

Moon: *long deep sigh*

Sun: Did you just really type out ‘long deep sigh’?

Moon: Yes, Sun, yes I did.

Sun: Alrighty then.

Eclipse: Hey samesies on the ADHD.

Lunar: I am now denouncing having ADHD.

Eclipse: Oh, come on!

Lunar: Nu-uh, don’t wanna bond with you over ANYTHING be happy I’m talking in a chatroom where you are.

Eclipse: Not even if I wanted to watch the Saw movies with you?

Lunar: …

Lunar: I’m bringing over my disk set of all ten movies, you better set up fast, you discount soggy Dorito chip. This will take 16 hours and 11 minutes minimum with no pauses.

Eclipse: Getting everything ready. Polar, GET OUT!

Polar: I’ve been evicted in favor of gore movies.

Lunar: You can join if you want.

Polar: Nah. I don’t handle gore well.

Lunar: Then yeah, stay the fuck out.

Polar: Guess I’m stealing the guest room tonight then.

Moon: You’re weird, Polar.

Lunar: Don’t make it sound like you didn’t puke watching them the first time.

Moon: Listen! Some of them got me yeah. Especially Valentina. And Joyce.

Lunar: You better shut up about Valentina and Joyce before I shut you up. No spoiling Eclipse!

Eclipse: I have no clue who those people are, I’m just happy to spend time and bond with you over ADHD.

Lunar: …I’ve been bamboozled by my hyperfixation into *gag* spending time with you.

Eclipse: We’ll you can’t leave now, the first movie’s already playing and you said you’d show me the movies.

Lunar: Alas.

6:41am

Why Is This My Family?

Moon: Sooooooo

Moon: How did bonding goooooo?

Eclipse: New hyperfixation! New hyperfixation!

Lunar: It was nice watching the movies again with someone who doesn’t throw up watching them.

Moon: Listen, I’ve apologized seven times now for throwing up on you during the Valentina scene. I’m sorry! At least we weren’t in a theater and I cleaned it up!

[mamashenanigans]

SURPRISE I come baring KudoxYoichi fruit!!!

Yes! This is the first scene from the next chapter of Urges!

This second chapter is all about Yoichi meeting Kudo and Bruce, but the majority of it will be from AFO’s perspective. This first scene is the only one from Yoichi’s perspective this chapter or, at least, that’s the current plan. Who knows with me, though. I might end up doing a back and forth perspective for this chapter. I’m still feeling it out. Regardless, Kudo and Bruce are brought into the picture and AFO isn’t too thrilled about sharing his brother nor watching him want to give to these complete strangers. Cue awkward first meetings, horror from Kudo and Bruce, and an inevitable “bring your boyfriend to family dinner” scene that will either be hilarious or downright creepy!

This first scene is quite cute and therefore includes a meet cute, but keep in mind what kind of writer I am! Once it switches to AFO, things are going to get weird and creepy.

Anywhooooo, read it below and let me know what you think! If you haven’t read Urges, please do and maybe leave a kudo and/or comment to help me get through my day of grooming dogs. There are only so many times you can shave a doggy butthole before you need a little cheering up! 😝

(The first time I tried to post this, my tumblr app decided to make me look like a fool and double pasted. This is a new post)

“Ugh!”

Yoichi dropped his overflowing basket to the floor as he scoured through the products on the shelves. This particular grocer was a favorite of his as it didn’t just stock Japanese necessities, but also ingredients from other countries. When it opened, he had been over the moon, bugging his brother incessantly about how amazing the selection is.

Per usual, Big Brother was more concerned about how the haul would help him and didn’t care much for Yoichi’s fervent ramblings over his love for the place. The younger twin couldn’t help his excitement nor the chance to tease his brother over the elder most likely never setting foot in the place. That always earned him a hard scowl or a shove to the shoulder. Normally both.

He’d tell himself that it wasn’t his fault his brother rarely deigned to leave the house unless it involved business, but that would be partly a lie. Okay, maybe an entire lie. He sorta, probably, definitely was the cause for his twin’s physicality at this point, however, Yoichi didn’t like to dwell on it especially now that the brothers had come to an understanding about the needs of the other.

Still, this grocery run had become exhausting.

The night prior, the twins had been watching a cooking competition show. Actually, Yoichi had been binging different food related shows all day now that most pre-meta streaming services had finally returned.

Big Brother had started teasing him early in the day, but his annoyance grew every time he found Yoichi glued to the screen, eyes huge, and papers with recipe ideas strewn across the coffee table and couch. The older brother eventually picked up his smaller twin(he didn’t even bother using a meta ability) and took him into the kitchen, setting him on his feet and dramatically motioning to all the advanced appliances.

“How about you pretend you’re on a cooking show and make me something to eat!”

After sticking his tongue out at his brother’s retreating back, Yoichi had hollered, “I totally could be on a cooking show and I’d win!”

His brother’s deep voice answered, “We all have dreams we’ll never attain, dear brother!”

Yoichi was already yawning once they had sat down to eat their frustration-induced dinner, but perked up when he found a new competition show. He almost broke the remote with how hard and quickly he mashed the buttons, and he could feel his brother roll his eyes.

“Really? You aren’t tired of this drivel?”

”Never!”

Once they were done eating, well, once Yoichi was done eating, he couldn’t stop himself from excitedly talking about all the recipes he would love to make.

And that was his first mistake.

His brother grinned at him and pulled Yoichi in close; their eyes locked.

”Hmm, I heard you say a certain dish I would just love to enjoy tomorrow night. If you can make it.”

Yoichi glared at his brother and sat up straight. He crossed his arms. “I can make anything, Big Brother!”

”Oh, really? Then I’m sure you’ll have no trouble making me Tonkatsu ramen!”

Yoichi’s eyes bugged out and he stuttered, “Wh-what?! You, you, dammit, you know I never cut corners! What the hell! That’s going to take me, take me—”

”All. Day.” Big Brother pulled back and held his stomach as he let out a boisterous laugh. Yoichi seethed.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!”

”Please, we’ve always been together. You know damn well when I’m kidding. I’m just helping you realize your dream of being on ‘what’s his face’s show!”

”That face is THE Gordon Ramsey and you know that!”

Big Brother tutted and flapped his fingers. “Yes, yes, the British one that yells. I must admit I respect his gumption. Went right back to that Hell show before America even got back on its feet.”

”It’s Hell’s Kitchen. You know that.”

”Mmmhmm.”

”Ahhhh,” Yoichi screeched and pulled at his hair, “the only way I can do it right is to go right now and get everything! You know it takes over a day, don’t you? I’m going to have to have the broth cooking tonight, it has to stay on the stove overnight, cook more during the day, then it—ugh! Big Brother, I swear, if I didn’t know, explicitly from you saying it all the time, that you’d ‘stop death from taking me’, I’d think you want me to keel over!”

Big Brother just stared at him, a humor twinkling in his eyes and an annoying grin on his face. “Well, I have faith in you, my little twin.”

Yoichi jumped to his feet, gave his brother one last glare, and then grabbed his things. His muttering didn’t subside even after he left and especially when his brother called out, “Don’t take forever and bring me something sweet back!”

Even though Yoichi had returned as fast as he could, his brother still complained he was gone too long. It didn’t help matters that he decided to state as such when Yoichi was still standing in the hall with his arms full of grocery bags and his white locks in a state of disarray.

His rush ended up biting him in the ass the next day once he realized he had completely forgotten the pork belly for the chashu. Luckily, it didn’t take anywhere near as long as the rest of the meal to prepare, but that meant he was now back at the store to buy it. However, Yoichi wasn’t one to ever just buy one thing. Perhaps it was him being spoiled by his brother’s money or his mind working in overdrive to come up with more ways to give. All he knew was that he was fairly certain he was out of paprika. And onion powder. And…maybe 3, or 5, or more ingredients.

Before he knew it, his basket was so full that he felt heavily encumbered. With it on the floor now, he was able to more expertly parse through the delicate glass bottles that lined the shelves.

“Where is it? There it is! No, no, that one doesn’t look good. Is there another brand? I wonder…”

Unbeknownst to Yoichi, another customer had taken to looking through the snacks nearby, which ended up being quite fruitoutus when—

“Oh, shit!”

One of the expensive glass bottles fell from the shelf and Yoichi embarrassingly missed catching it twice before it was caught by a calloused hand.

“Yo, may want to be a little more careful.”

Yoichi hastily grabbed the bottle from the stranger and went to apologize (maybe a bow or two?) but went rigid once he finally set eyes on the man that had saved him from having to profusely apologize to the store owner.

“Um, I…I” Yoichi didn’t have words. He couldn’t say he had felt this emotion before that was blossoming in his chest. It wasn’t like when his urges took over, but definitely danced with the feeling he’d have when taking advantage of the plethora of options on the internet. The kind he was always ready to hide from his brother’s discerning eyes with a quick switch to another window on his laptop.

The man that had saved him from public embarrassment gave him a questioning look. His hair was spiked and a lovely shade of orange. His eyes were red (like Big Brother’s) but not quite the same shade nor intensity, and his skin spoke of a life of hard work. The stranger’s clothes looked like they were chosen in a rush and Yoichi easily found every tear and stain.

He was nothing like the men he enjoyed pleasuring himself to in the dead of night after sneaking out of his and his brother’s shared bed.

Ruggedly handsome. Yes, that’s what he was.

“Uh, you okay there, champ?”

”Oh, uh, yeah, yeah! I’m just dandy!”

”Ah…huh.”

Crap! Yoichi! You are ruining this!

”I, uh, sorry! I just haven’t, um, seen you here before!”

”So, you keep a record of everyone that shops here?”

Yoichi’s face went red and he hurriedly shook his head ‘no’.

“Whoa, there! I’m just kidding!”

”Yes! I just meant that, well, I come here a lot. And by a lot I mean, like, almost everyday, so I was just a little surprised is all…”

”Right. Anyway, it looks like you owe me now. Saved you from having to deal with that grumpy old guy at the front.”

”I heard that, you hooligan!” A gruff voice spoke over the loudspeaker.

”Damn. This place is really nice, isn’t it? Even has a good ‘ol timer to watch me on the cameras like a damn hawk.”

Yoichi laughed and not in a cute way like he wanted. It came out more like it would from his brother.

His brother. Well, that killed the mood.

”Um, thanks for being my hero!”

Good one, Yoichi. Great job. Totally not stupid.

“Heh. Hero, aye? Never heard that one before. Just call me Kudo.”

Yoichi felt a warmth grow within him and not where he’d normally feel his urges. No, much lower.

“I’m, uh, Yoichi.”

”Well, Yoichi, it was good to meet you, but I’d prefer the next time to not include almost destroying pricey merchandise, okay?”

Next time?!

”Yo, Kudo!” A blue haired man near the front with his hair pulled back called out.

Kudo turned slightly to look at him and Yoichi noticed how the other man cocked his head at a stranger checking out. Maybe another friend?

”Well, looks like I need to be going.” Kudo put back the bag of snacks he was holding and turned to leave, but Yoichi stopped him. “Why did you put that back? I can help if you need it! I’ll buy it for you!” The words flew out of his mouth before his brain could catch up. He wasn’t especially adept at speaking with people other than Big Brother. It had always been just them and surviving, but even now that they were comfortable and no longer had to scrap on the streets, Yoichi never had ventured far with finding friends.

“Uh, yeah, no, dude. It’s all good. Something came up, that’s all. Maybe I’ll see you around again, who knows?”

Kudo walked away towards the blue-haired man and they exchanged some words then followed the stranger that had just paid out the door.

“You two better buy something next time! I’m running a business! Not a hostel!” The old man behind the counter yelled.

Yoichi stood there for a few minutes mulling over the strange encounter he just went through.

Oh, god! He just had a meet-cute! His closed smile took over his face and he was partly convinced little hearts must be bursting around his head.

There would definitely be a “next time” as the handsome, not-quite-put-together clothes wearing, orange haired man named Kudo said.

Yoichi’s phone went off interrupting his semi-lustful thoughts. He took a peak and groaned. A text from his Big Brother on the screen.

BigBro: “What the hell is taking you so long? Weren’t you just getting pork? What’s going on—”

Yoichi growled and put his phone back in his pocket.

Great. Of course, his Big Brother would be the one to kill this amazing mood he was having.

But still…

Next time.

[huriya]

We Need Revolution in You and Me

We are watching a country die.

All the while, we know why.

All the while, I see kids like me scream and cry while missiles demolish their homes.

And I sit here in my middle class house with my family and friends,

And I avoid the subject of war because not even my father knows who he’d fight for,

He only knows he would fight with hate disguised as love because that’s what he is told.

Those of you who claim you are prevented from protest by society are lying to yourselves,

You are restrained by society’s individual,

You think you are unable to do anything but watch this genocide,

Watch this genocide on your screen made from the labor of child slaves,

Your screen that is now necessary for modern life,

Your modern life is a life where corporations have told you slavery is necessary,

Where you know every piece in your wardrobe is the fruit of unpaid labor,

The clothes that cover your skin fail to cover up their origin, their sin:

Those countries we know we infiltrated as a false agent of "freedom",

Those countries we accept as sacrifices for our daily lives,

Those countries being burned by the flames of climate change,

But we’ll continue to consume oil and gas because you say it's "too hard to change",

With that sort of thinking we may as well go back to African slaves,

In our justification of the evils of life we become the evil ourselves,

When we ignore the consequences of our luxury and do nothing we are complicit,

Complicit in the generational control of those people we perceive as less than,

Those people who live to die for us without a choice,

Raised by survivors of cultural rape in a cycle of trauma,

Trauma inflicted by that same system we claim is "too hard to change",

For the system sustains our lives by taking others,

And if we want our lives to stay we must turn a blind eye,

A blind eye to hatred and love and thought,

And if we must know of the less-than-human people who die,

We can claim we couldn’t try,

Because their suffering can only be ended when we face the end of our privilege,

And we claim our privilege protects us from what we call the true struggle,

The true struggle we lay upon others while we lavish in our capitalistic society,

Where the number of zeros in your bank account determines your worth,

And the billionaires lay the blame on your neighbors to redirect it from themselves,

While they watch us pick each other apart in a battle where both sides lose,

Where every side loses except the side comparable to God,

God’s grace comes with a cost for the sake of adding to the ever-growing banks of heaven,

Those banks filled with the flow of money once meant to trickle down,

Barricaded by pearly gates to prevent the “lazy” man’s hydration,

And when we have been sucked dry we may finally look up in the sky,

And realize why no one won the wars we all believed were worth fighting for,

Because all we were was entertainment for the more-than humans,

The ones who trampled our children to get ahead,

And jailed our brothers to steal their rights with fear,

And now we fear our brothers and hate our mothers and never know our fathers,

And we don’t give a damn for the rest of them,

Because we’re too busy playing the blame game to have any real goal to attain,

And if we can’t work together we can’t hope to end the cycle of pain,

And so we’ll continue to buzz around our lives like flies coveting trash,

Because we allow ourselves to be too afraid to make real change,

And we pretend we can be truly happy in a world where our children’s time is monopolized by our own government to train good little workers who won’t question money’s authority.

-Huriya, 4/2/2024

[thereader-radhika]

Some crazy Ponniyin Selvan prompts

• Poonkuzhali joins Pandya Aabathudavigal.

Some time ago, some people from the Pandya country came here. They wanted me to help them wreak vengeance on the royal family which had betrayed my aunt. It was then that I heard my aunt's story. My blood began to boil and I decided to join them. Later, I came to know how my aunt felt about all this. . . . Then I abandoned the idea of joining hands with the Pandya group. As you said my aunt's love is really divine. But mark my words, I won't be like her. If any Prince tries to deceive me I'll take revenge. I'll kill him. I'll also kill the woman who steals him from me. Then I'll stab myself and die.

• Vanathi joins Buddha monastery for real.

Vanathi went on: "Yes! I've decided to become a Buddhist sanyasini. Why do you object to that? Weren't there many women in ancient Tamil Nadu who became ascetics? Did not Madhavi's daughter, Manimekalail, become an ascetic and attain divinity and don't we praise her now as the Goddess Manimekalai? I have no such aspirations. I tried to end my useless life, but failed in the attempt. Perhaps it is God's wish that I live a little longer. I want to join a Buddhist monastery and spend my time serving people. You won't refuse to help me, will you?"

• Chinna Pazhuvettaraiyar Kalanthaka Kandar adopts Vanthiyathevan.

Let's wait, he thought, until my older brother returns. We can find out about him then and do whatever is best. A warrior like him should be inducted into our private bodyguard. Even a portion of his ancestral kingdom could be given back to him. Helping boys like this will bind them to us and ensure their loyalty. But if he's proved an enemy, we'll have to make other plans. Let's wait for my brother, anyway. We’ll see.

• Poonkuzhali fakes her death and runs away from the palace.

The court politics and the never ending scheming are so tiring and infuriating. She doesn't like Senthan as much as thought and Emperor Senthan is the most eligible married man in the country. She runs away, to embrace the waves once again.

• Manimegalai thinks 'ponal pogattum poda' (let it go) and starts to manage the affairs of Sambuvarayar clan when Kandan Maran is away on border patrol.

She is totally embarassed about her emotional outburst about a man who doesn't like her, that too to the woman he actually loves.

• Parthipendra Pallavan and Manimegalai decide to get married out of spite and plot the end of Vanthiyathevan and Kundavai.

Yeah, I made that up. I am crazy.

If anyone writes anything, please tag me so that my evil heart can rejoice 😏

@vibishalakshman @willkatfanfromasia @celestesinsight @harinishivaa @nspwriteups @nature-writes29, @whippersnappersbookworm @philtstone @sambaridli @sampigehoovu @thirst4light @dr-scribbler @doesitmatterluv @thirishareads

[beautifulpersonpeach]

It's cold and dreary and the tannies are gone,,, *cries in the corner* But the re-debuting (?) efforts for 2 cool 4 skool (I definitely didn't know how to spell this lol) is so heartwarming!! I just feel warm and fuzzy inside, you know?? Do you know if these fandom efforts are typical for kpop groups? I don't know what to expect for this ms era. I keep seeing articles and discussions that talk about who'll fill in the gap that's left by bts. It's not that I'm super worried (I know exactly where I stand), but I just don't know what will happen next as a whole. I quite enjoy the current army atmosphere. It makes me think that armys are the best when they are working towards a goal. Would you be able to share what are the things that ppl (who's never been through something like this) should keep in mind moving forward for the next 6month-1.5year? Thank you so much!

***

Yeah, re-charting old songs is something more than a few fandoms do from time to time, but ARMYs’ aim of re-charting several old songs, sometimes whole albums, at once and methodically - that’s something I don’t think has been done before. And yes it warms my heart to see the fandom give BTS this. Even though it’s more of symbolic gesture than ‘huge achievement’, it’s a tangible way the fandom can express that we intend to stick by BTS this entire time. Life might happen, we might explore other groups and hobbies or take some time to ourselves, but we’ll never really abandon BTS or forget them while they’re in service. It also allows the fandom the opportunity to re-experience BTS’s old music. It’s reminding me of why I fell in love with them in the beginning.

And you’re right. The fandom does need a goal to work towards. One of the first things I said on this blog that I remember people got mad at me for (lol), was that I think many ARMYs are just Type A k-pop stans who prioritize BTS. A lot of us do well with targets and performance measures, using information and ingenuity to achieve desired goals for someone we love genuinely gets us going. When the fandom is aimless people go crazy. So yeah, keep ARMYs busy and peace will be reasonably attainable.

It seems HYBE intends to keep milking the fandom too - more documentaries are coming, at least four members will release new music over the next 1.5 years, we might get a Jin tour/showcase or Hobi live performances, etc. So I guess we’ve got nothing to worry about on that front.

I’m not too sure myself what to expect between now and 2025. Last week I talked about what usually happens when a group enlists based on what I’ve observed:

1. Some people take a break away from k-pop fully.

2. Some explore other groups, whether or not they end up stanning as well.

3. Some people stay in k-pop and remain only committed to BTS

All three options are valid and sometimes there’s no real difference between how people approach options 2 and 3.

But really, while the guys are in the military I don’t expect the infighting within the fandom to reduce. At best it’s going to remain this annoying for the next 18 months. I know people are hopeful we get more spaced out releases but I’m actually expecting some stacked line-ups in releases next year. I’m also not expecting Seven/Golden-style promotions for any member that doesn’t release under HYBE America. The usual suspects (akgaes, shooters, antis, shippers) will be whining in any case so it’s going to be a pain.

And outside the fandom, I know the race is going to be mad. Right now ATEEZ, Stray Kids, NewJeans, RIIZE, Aespa, VCHA, Katseye, IVE, SHINee, Blackpink and few more… are revving up to take over in 2024. I’m so curious to see all the ways these groups/their companies will try to fill the BTS vacuum. How they will try to court ARMYs and pitch themselves as the rightful successors to BTS.

I’m not really sure what to expect but I know it’s going to be a fun time that’s for sure.

[thebibutterflyao3]

Day Six - Celebration @sapphicmicrofics

April Daily Series - 576 words

<<<Previous Part OR Start Here

Dorcas worked full-time as a legal assistant, she had a Bachelor of Laws degree, and was actively studying for the Solicitor’s exam. The last thing that she needed was a distraction from her lofty goals and the obscene amount of work required to attain them. She didn’t have time to lose herself in that devilish grin and those ocean blue eyes.

Stop it! That’s not helping.

She tore her gaze from the photos and shook her head clear. Dorcas needed Marlene like she needed a hole in her head. Both would destroy everything she’d built for herself here in London. When she finished her law program, Dorcas decided to forgo a celebration in favour of continuing her dogged pursuit of a solicitor’s title. Her parents were proud of her and she was proud of herself. That’s all she needed.

Nothing would impede her progress now. Not even a fit, blonde hockey player with muscular thighs, curvy hips, and arms that were deceptively strong. Definitely not.

“What on earth are you thinking about?” Pandora asked, tilting her head to the side curiously. “You look overwhelmed all of a sudden.”

Dorcas dismissed her with a wave of her hand. “Nothing. Lost in my thoughts.”

“Thoughts about Marlene?”

“No!” Dorcas stood up and resumed her pacing. She needed to settle herself and the repetitive movement helped. Walking stimulated blood circulation to the brain and she needed all the help she could get, at the moment.

Pandora followed her path with her eyes, but remained curled up on Dorcas’s bed. She never simply sat on a piece of furniture. That would be entirely too easy. No, of course not. Pandora insisted on draping herself over furniture like a Greek goddess instead.

“Come out for drinks with us tonight.”

Dorcas shook her head. “Alcohol and agitation are a terrible combination.”

“You need to relax, Dorcas.”

“The last thing that I need to do with her around is to relax,” Dorcas retorted, pointing at the closed bedroom door. “I will not allow myself to backslide now. Not after everything I went through last time.”

Pandora hummed thoughtfully, then shrugged. “Fine, but you should know that she’s crashing on our sofa for the next few days. You can’t avoid her forever.”

“I thought Lily was crashing on the sofa.”

With a derisive snort, Pandora shook her head. “Do you know how long it's been since I had a girlfriend? Too long. She’s sleeping in here with me.”

Dorcas nearly tripped over her own feet. “What?”

“We have a two bedroom flat, Dorcas. Until Reg gives in to James and moves out, we’ll have to share the master.”

“All three of us?”

Pandora’s smile didn’t waiver as she nodded slowly. “Yes, it should be fun. Don’t you think so?”

“Pandora, if you shag her while I’m in here, I will–”

“That will not be a problem.”

Dorcas eyed her warily. “It won’t?”

“No, because Lily is a screamer and she’d be mortified if you heard her.”

Pandora’s expression was completely unbothered and her voice matter-of-fact. As if she hadn’t just given Dorcas a glimpse of her and her girlfriend’s physical relationship entirely unprompted. Then again, this wasn’t new. Pandora always was a little too open about her sex life.

“Yes, well…let’s make that a new house rule then,” Dorcas said, biting back the urge to tell her off.

What was I going to say? How dare you have mind-blowing sex with your girlfriend? I am losing the plot.

Next Part>>>

[ghoulsbeard]

At noonday the College common is packed with hungry young prentices, a handful of traders, journeymen and masters and an envoy from the jarl having her lunch. Wispy clouds flit overhead on a biting steady wind. No sign of any Synod stragglers listening in— or Thalmor robes.

“I understand the budget is stretched thin,” Colette says, as usual, with an eye on the envoy, but then— she fidgets with her scarf in a little self-conscious gesture, and studiously avoids Mirabelle’s eyes, as she has not done before. “In my younger years I served as scribe to a shipping clerk. I wouldn’t deign to pen your letters, of course, Master Wizard; but I have a good eye for copying, and a clear hand.”

From Tolfdir, gently: “Terrible on the back, you know. Sleeping in that dreadful desk chair.”

Mirabelle steps aside for a string of chattering teenagers hauling armfuls of books and spellery supplies. “…I will consider that, thank you, Colette.” She is surprised by the steadiness of her own voice. “But to business, while I have you both. There is still the matter of Mzulft.”

“Dear me,” says Tolfdir.

Colette frowns. “Plinius and his set are two days gone.”

“Loria asked after them the other day. She’s convinced— that is, the Augur, the orb, this old staff they’re all determined to unearth.” She glances round again for Ancano and doesn’t find him. “I don’t believe in coincidence. And I won’t have them pin our students in the middle of their plans. We must be ready for trouble.”

“The Archmage,” Colette begins, and trails away. “…Yes, of course. Whatever is needed.”

“I don’t like any of it,” Tolfdir agrees. “The scroll and Saarthal have been trouble enough.”

Mirabelle drops her voice. “If this staff of Magnus should come to our halls— ”

“Master Wizard,” Colette cuts in primly. “You have a visitor.”

Mirabelle turns; at her elbow, Urag’s nervous young assistant clears her throat. It’s the first time Mirabelle has seen her dressed in College colors. The faded sash and mantle are both a touch too large.

She smiles. “Good afternoon.”

The poor young woman trembles all over.

“Ervine!” Arniel Gane appears as if unhelpfully conjured, harried and out of temper, storming her direction from the Hall of Attainment.

“I, um,” says Tsona-Vos. Her frills flutter. “Ah, never mind— I can see you’re very busy…”

“You may return during office hours,” Colette intones, scowling Arniel’s direction.

“I did,” Tsona-Vos says, miserably, and then as Mirabelle watches she lashes her tail and draws herself up. “Master Wizard, I— I’ve made you something— and Nirya said it was well done.”

She can feel Tolfdir raising his eyebrows.

“By her stars!” murmurs Colette.

The gift is a bronze pendant, about the size of a standard Imperial coin, thick and dark and sorceled from heart to cool circumference in a sternly woven shielding charm. It’s her policy to scrutinize magical gifts, but the craft involved is confident; and many of her students have been frightened since the Augur spoke. She had no idea Tsona-Vos was studying enchantment.

“How thoughtful,” Mirabelle observes. “This is fine work.”

Tsona-Vos gapes for a moment, then startles to attention and awkwardly clasps her hands at her back with a fraction of Urag’s gravity. “Er, yes. I mean—! Thank you, Master Wizard! I…”

“Mistress Ervine,” Arniel yowls as he advances from behind a group of gossiping journeymen.

Tolfdir touches her shoulder. “Alterationist at thirty paces.”

“I’ll put it on right now,” Mirabelle decides, and somehow Tsona-Vos’ huge stunned eyes seem to widen even further. “Thank you.”

“Oh,” cries Tsona-Vos, rambling her gratitude, and waves with both hands when Mirabelle bids her good day. At the gatehouse Faralda and a fellow in a sealskin coat have gotten into some loud disagreement with Enthir, swanning about half-frozen in his dressing gown. Mirabelle tucks the gift beneath her collar, with a private grimace for the rough twine it hangs on.

“If this staff of Magnus should come to us, we’ll have more to contend with than the Synod.”

“Perhaps the Augur has been misinterpreted,” Colette suggests under her breath.

“Just so,” Tolfdir agrees, turning to wave at Onmund and Brelyna. “And it will take them a week to return from Mzulft, a week at least. In the meantime I’d like another look round Hall of the Elements— if you don’t mind, Mirabelle.”

“Well,” Mirabelle begins, sharply, but then Gane is upon her all afrost. At the edge of the crowd, Ancano meets her gaze and smiles.

——————

There was no time or sense to any of it. Later it came back out of order: Ancano’s shadowed face in the screaming light of the Eye— the sucking gasp at the center of her chest where something woke— an airless shattering bright tide of will— the wave of magic risen to his hand. She thought she remembered Faralda carrying an apprentice under each arm. She knew Tolfdir lingered at the doors, even without seeing him actually do it; nothing and no one could persuade him to leave her behind, despite being ordered out with the rest. The blast itself never returned except in certain dreams.

She had a dim idea of being thrown, hard; then Tolfdir was shaking her by the shoulders, where she was flat on her back instead of her feet, bruisy-headed, piled like a sack of fish against the cold chamber wall. “Not like this, no, Wolf-mother, please not like this, please, please— Mirabelle. Please, Mirabelle. Can you hear me?”

She moved her tongue around a mouth of blood and magic ash. “Yes.” The air blazed pale terrible blue. Her eyes stung. For a moment Savos hung over her, concerned or confused; she blinked hard and he was gone.

“Can you get to your feet? Take my hand. In her claws, Mirabelle, I can’t believe you— I thought— ” his voice shook. “I feared…” He shut his eyes, smiling, and shook his head. By the Eye’s wall of endless light he looked old as the cliffs. “I’ll be grateful for your luck as long as I live.”

“I don’t understand it either,” Mirabelle told him, lowly. Tolfdir’s face shuddered beneath his crying. “I felt every ward drain to the marrow.”

From a groggy distance she realized her hand was pulsing with hurt. She forced it off her chest and pried each of the stiff fingers open. Clenched there in her fist: Tsona-Vos’s charm, shattered into six blood-slick pieces, where the last of Ancano’s spell had found its mark.

[lesbiansandgayssupporttheminers]

Fighting to Stand Still

At one of our union actions recently, someone mentioned the idea that we (by which I mean striking workers) are often fighting so hard just to stand still. We’re fighting against job losses, we’re fighting for a pay rise that simply matches inflation. We’re trying to stop our sector hemorrhaging workers.

In the NEU we’ve now been on 8 days of strikes, and maybe… just maybe… we’ll get a pay rise of 6.5% that doesn’t quite match inflation. It seems like the junior doctors might get similar. Nurses ended up with the 5% they voted to reject.

Never mind pay restoration. Certainly never mind major improvements to our working conditions.

I’m not saying the will isn’t there to keep on fighting- my union colleagues continue to inspire me with their dedication and desire to keep on doing this. I think there’s a lot of hope in teaching about all the unions striking together.

But I do think the real ambition isn’t there- the real desire to say, “Actually, it’s not enough to make things a little bit better for teachers, but also we need to start thinking about real societal change”.

 Equally, I think I’ve mentioned on here before that I think the Tory long term goal is to do away with qualified teachers in England for all sorts of reasons. When I first started talking about this, I felt like a conspiracy theorist, but more and more people seem to be coming up with the same conclusions.

In England, most teachers working in state schools will have, or be working towards QTS (Qualified Teacher Status). This means they are degree educated professionals, many of whom will also have a post grad qualification like a PGCE.

This creates two problems for the Tories. One, they have to pay teachers a decent, competitive graduate salary- and that’s expensive. The Tories don’t like wasting money on state education.

Two, in general, people with degrees don’t vote Tory. I don’t want to stereotype here, but people with a degree level education tend to be able to think critically about what they’re told. They often hold social views that work against the Tory narrative. And they’re exposing children to those views.

The Tories don’t want socially mobile young people who are able to think critically about right wing propaganda. They want the working class to have limited options and to know their place, and buy into fascist narratives uncritically.

The solution? Get rid of teaching as a graduate profession. Have students supervised by TAs on a low wage, whilst they learn from pre-approved government videos and complete tasks created by AI. Lower educational attainment for the working classes. Less critical thinking skills. Less money wasted on educating them…

It sounds terrible and dystopian, right?

 To avoid that, perhaps fighting to stand still is worth it?

[mainstoryarchive]

Revolution - 62: Chaos

Translator: Creampuffs

Rei: The plan is a success. We leave the main part of the plan to our brethren – “2wink”!

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Location: Auditorium

Rei: The plan is a success. We leave the main part of the plan to our brethren – “2wink”!

Hinata: Alrighty.

Yuta: That was a great performance, Sakuma-senpai.

Hinata: You called for us, so here we are ♪

Yuta: Tadaaa ♪

Keito: (……!? Where did they come from?)

(Their outfits are different – they’re not “UNDEAD”. I’ve never seen them before, but… are they newcomers who have yet to take part in an "A1"?)

(They shouldn’t be performing today, but all the paperwork must have been done behind the scenes.)

(It’s one outlandish scheme after the other!)

(They’re twins… which means they must be the first-year Aoi brothers. If I remember correctly, they should be members of the Light Music Club – Sakuma’s juniors. Are they also part of his plan?)

Hinata: Hey, stop looking so tense like the protagonist of a battle manga and leave already ♪

Yuta: You’re going over your performing time, so you’ll be penalised, you know~? ♪

Keito: Ugh… how imprudent can you two be? “UNDEAD” and “2wink” – just know you two won’t have a place at this school when this dreamfest is over!

Rei: Is now really the time to be talking about our fate? You never know – perhaps the school may undergo a change after this dreamfest.

If a revolution occurs, then the previous king will be taken to the guillotine ♪

But we’d only be a nuisance if we stayed here forever. My fellow unit members, we’re leaving!

We’ve done our job – I’ll be sure to shower my dear unit with praises afterwards ♪

Kaoru: What~? Being praised by you doesn’t make me happy at all, you know.

Anyway, is it true that I’ll get a kiss from the Transfer Student if I did my best for the performance?

That’s the only reason why I gave my everything for the performance, you know~? ♪

Rei: Hm. When did I ever say that…?

Kaoru: Wha!? It’s not time for you to start becoming senile, Sakuma-san.

You’ve got to be kidding me~ I worked so hard!

Koga: Stop yappin’ and get off the stage, you geezers! Outta my way!

Adonis, we’re leaving and taking the equipment we brought on stage with us!

We’ve also gotta set up the stage for “Trickstar”, so we’re hella busy!

Geez, why’re we even doin’ something like this…?

Well, I guess I do owe the Transfer Student. Now, we’re even, dammit!

Adonis: I’m good at doing manual labour. Kanzaki, could you lend a hand?

Souma: Hm? I do not think I am obligated to help you, though? W-What should I do… Hasumi-dono!

Keito: Don’t mind them. It’s not our time to perform anymore. We need to leave the stage, otherwise we’ll receive a penalty.

I’m going to leave the stage and get a grasp on the situation. Afterwards, I’ll summon the members of the Student Council, and then we’ll think about how to deal with all this.

We lost our initiative, but we can turn the tables around. No… the stable order the Student Council built will not crumble due to something of this level!

Hinata: Yeah, yeah. Just hurry up and leave, okay?

Yuta: It’s not fun if the opening act takes forever to leave, right? Especially when the audience is so pumped up already~

Keito: You’re saying… we’re the opening act!?

Hinata: Sorry if we hurt your pride, but that’s just how things naturally came to be~♪

Yuta: At the very least, that’s how the audience sees the three of us – “UNDEAD”, “AKATSUKI” and “2wink”.

Hinata: Attain victory first and put an end to everything…

Looks like the system that allowed you to be invincible was useless~ Normally, the opening act are those who appear on stage first ☆

Yuta: The heroes arrive after.

Hinata: With all that said, it’s time for the main stars to arrive…

“Trickstar”, the up-and-coming idol unit Yumenosaki Academy has been waiting for, will begin their performance shortly~☆

Yuta: Please welcome them with a big round of applause! ♪

[ ☆ ]

← prev ❖ all ❖ next →

[somekndofnature]

Summary:

Inuyasha reveals something important to Sango and Miroku that shocks both. Kagome and Sango get some things off their chest.

Notes:

Hello all! Time for another couple of chapters. These next two sort of go together so I wanted to release them together. This is where the story starts getting thicc. So, I hope you enjoy.

For this chapter, there were a few songs that really inspired this chapter. First, is 'Walls (You Changed)' by Sick Puppies. I feel like this song is really important from Sango and Kagome's perspective, towards Inuyasha. And for those who were wondering about the music Inu is working on, this is one of the songs he ends up 'writing' in the story as he grows a little more. Second is 'Goodbye Apathy' by One Republic which is obviously chosen for Inuyasha in this moment. And the last is 'Torn' by Natalie Imbrugila which is also probably obviously chosen for Kagome.

Anyway... that's my music rant for now. Let me know if you like it.

AO3

Chapter 4: That Left Me On the Floor

Inuyasha was stunned into silence and could only watch Kagome’s shoulders tremble as she retreated towards the restroom, wheezing from the hole she’d punched straight through his chest. Each tear that had fallen onto her cheeks lashed his heart like a whip, drawing an answering warmth from his eyes. He had struggled to stay in place, compelled to drop to his knees and grovel on all fours, begging forgiveness. He knew that he had hurt her but…

You broke me.

Inuyasha bit back the whine that crawled its way up his throat and let his head fall into his hand, rubbing the gathered moisture from his eyes. Fuck , he hated seeing her cry. That was why he had always walked away; he’d never been able to take the shame that could—rightly—be placed at his feet for hurting her.

“Smooth,” Sango said from beside him.

Inuyasha scowled in her direction but didn’t respond; he had nothing to say in his defense.

Miroku sighed and pushed a hand through his dark hair. “Well, I guess that’s out of the question. It sucks, but I think we’ll have to find someone else.”

“No!” he growled, making their eyes widen. “It has to be her, no one else.”

Sango shook her head. “Inuyasha, I know you feel guilty for everything that happened but—”

“This isn’t about that!”

She raised a dubious brow.

He winced. “It isn’t just about that. It’s—fuck, you wouldn’t understand.”

“Try me,” she insisted.

Inuyasha shook his head.

“If you want any more of my help with Kagome, you’ll have to tell me why this is so important. Why does it have to be her? Why are you suddenly so eager to have her in your life?”

His ears lowered against his head; he couldn’t tell them. When Sango and Miroku understood what Kagome meant to him, the resulting guilt might bury him alive.

“Inuyasha?” Sango prompted again.

He hung his head, allowing a curtain of silver hair to hide his face as he whispered, “She’s my mate.”

He heard them suck in a sharp breath. Both had no doubt heard the same stories in school growing up. Great demons searching for their fated mate, the first glimpse of romance that their little minds were afforded. Inuyasha had been bored out of his skull just listening to them.

In the past, when the world was smaller, there was a reasonable assumption that this goal was attainable, that this mysterious person who made up your other half could be found, but on a planet of over seven billion beings, those odds slimmed considerably. A mate was someone to be treasured, and he had treated Kagome like she was… worthless .

Argh! The sound of that word gasping from between her trembling lips wouldn’t leave his ears. It twisted his heart, pumping an icy poison of regret through his veins.

“Wh-what? When?” Sango went silent for several seconds before gritting out through her teeth, “How long have you known?”

“From the beginning,” he replied, voice low. “From the first day I met her.”

“I knew it. I knew you were hiding something from me.” He heard Sango move but didn’t even brace as her fist connected with his cheek. “You ass!”

Inuyasha’s head whipped to the side, and he embraced the sting. He deserved her wrath on behalf of their friend, on behalf of fate, on behalf of everything he had scoffed in the face of, like a complete idiot. If it made him worthy of Kagome, he’d let Sango beat the hell out of him with a godsdamn smile.

“Nine years?!” Sango screeched. “Nine years and you… you were fuckin around, stickin your dick in anything that moved—”

“I didn’t actually do that.”

“What?!”

He shrugged. “I know it looked like I was always with a woman, but I just wanted it to seem that way. I didn’t actually sleep with any of them; I couldn’t. After being with Kagome, touching another woman felt,” he shuddered in disgust, “wrong.”

“Why?” Miroku asked. “Inuyasha that just sounds—”

“Cruel,” Sango interjected. “Why the hell would you do that to her?”

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I was trying to push her away, to make her hate me.”

“Well, congratulations,” Miroku said with a hint of reproach in his tone. “I think you succeeded.”

Inuyasha’s head fell back, rubbing his hands between his spread legs while they jittered with tension. He was getting judgment from the pervert now?

“No doubt,” Sango agreed with a derisive snort. “You only made it worse by constantly falling into her bed, too.”

“I couldn’t help it!” He pushed a hand through his silver hair, scraping his claws against his scalp.  

Her lip curled with disgust. “That’s pathetic.”

“You got me, Sango,” he snapped. “I’m a completely pathetic, sad sack, piece of shit. Happy now?”

“Don’t say any of that like it’s going to save you,” she said, placing an indignant hand on her hip. “You think just because you finally pulled your head out of your ass means you deserve a second chance?”

His shoulders slumped. “No.”

“You’re damn right! What you deserve is to watch her move on with her life…”

Inuyasha squeezed his eyes shut as a hopeless anguish ripped through him, but Sango continued without mercy.

“You deserve to watch her find a man who treats her with compassion and devotion, like she’s precious.”

Mine! His demon howled from the back of his mind until his temples throbbed.

Still, she didn’t relent. “You deserve to watch her build a happy life and at its end to be surrounded by a family who loves and treasures her.”

Inuyasha folded in on himself, a keening whine breaking past his lips when he could no longer contain his misery. Did he deserve to watch Kagome leave him behind forever? Probably… Was it something he feared with every fiber of his being? Absolutely…

Miroku cleared his throat, saving him from any further torment. “Sango, sweetheart.”

“What?” she snapped.

“I’m not entirely sure if this shame-fest is having the desired effect.”

She went quiet for a long moment, but Inuyasha didn’t raise his gaze from the floor, which he was hoping would open and swallow him whole. “What was the point of doing all that?”

“I told you,” he said again. “To push her away.”

“Yes,” she hissed. “But why the hell would you want to do that? Any other demon in your position would be over the moon and that should go double for half-demons. Most people don’t even think you have mates. So, why?”

Inuyasha took a deep breath before answering. Eventually he’d have to face the same question from Kagome, he better get damn good at answering it now. “I was a dumbass! I was young and stupid and arrogant and…scared,” he admitted.

“Scared? Of what?” Miroku asked.

“I wasn’t ready for something like that,” he said, looking down at his clasped hands. “I’m not good with women in general. How was I supposed to win this person who was meant to be it for me? And let’s be honest, she’s way outta my league; it didn’t seem like we would ever actually fit together. It felt like I was being set up for failure.” He scratched at the back of his head. “I resented it, being forced into this relationship that I didn’t even want or think myself capable of growing. It wasn’t supposed to be like that, anyway. We were just starting out; it was supposed to be all parties and music and groupies.”

“Sex, drugs and rock-n-roll,” Miroku said in a wistful tone.

Inuyasha lifted his hand, gesturing at him over the table. “Exactly!”

“Don’t lump me in with you,” he grumbled. “You took that entire thing to an extreme.”

“Exactly!” Sango mocked with a similar wave of her hand.

Inuyasha scowled. “You don’t get it. These instincts are overwhelming. It felt like I wasn’t in control of myself.”

“And copious amounts of alcohol and amphetamines made that better?” Sango asked in a disbelieving tone.

“Not exactly,” he replied, rubbing at the back of his neck. “When I was around her, it made it damn near impossible to control my impulses, but away from her… I was able to forget about it, I didn’t feel this constant need gnawing at me.”

“Yeah, but that wasn’t just your instincts or fate,” she explained. “It was you being infatuated. The mating bond doesn’t force you to want someone, it reveals who you’re most likely to be compatible with.”

“I get that now,” Inuyasha replied, his mounting frustration clear in his tone. “But back then it was just easier to blame it all on my demon side and push it away.”

She clicked her tongue. “You almost died, Inu. Was it really worth it?”

“How many times you want me to admit that I’m a dumbass?”

His ears twitched as Sango cursed. “You’ve made such a mess of this.”

“I know.”

“No, you don’t,” she replied. “Humans feel it too, you know? That connection, those bonds of fate. We may not be able to name it and maybe we don’t feel it with the same intensity, but it’s there. Imagine the pain, the betrayal she felt.”

“Please … stop,” he whispered, hiding his face in his hands. “I just want to fix it.”

“Sango,” Miroku interjected again.

She sighed. “Inuyasha, I don’t know if you can fix this. You threw a gift back in fate’s face; you’ll need a miracle.”

He finally worked up the courage to meet her eyes. “Then help me… please ,” he begged through clenched teeth. “I can’t do this by myself.”

She pursed her lips. “Fine, I’ll go talk to her, but you have to promise me that if I get her to come back out here, you’ll be on your best behavior.”

He nodded.

“And you swear that you’re taking this seriously?” she asked. “No more waffling back and forth, no more jumping into bed with her only to push her away?”

“Fuck no!” he snapped before deflating. “Look, I know what life is like without her and I don’t want to do it anymore. If Kagome’s really done with me, then I’ll accept that,” he admitted, “but if there’s even the smallest chance that I can win her back… I gotta take it, Sango.”

She took a deep breath and exhaled, her face softening just a fraction. “Fine, I’ll go talk to her, but I don’t think she’s any happier with me than she is with you.”

Miroku chose this moment to pipe up, “I could go if—”

“No,” Inuyasha and Sango cut him off at the same time.

“The last thing we need is your brand of charm,” she added before walking away, following Kagome’s path to the restrooms.

-------------------------------------------- 

Kagome avoided the curious gaze of the woman standing at the mirror as she stormed into the bathroom, feeling the warm burn of tears in her eyes. She slammed open the door of the nearest cubicle and immediately rested her back against it, sucking in a shuddering breath. What the hell?

It was difficult to even parse out how she was feeling. All of her emotions clambered on top of each other, fighting for dominance: betrayal, rejection, grief, compassion, and even still longing.

This was supposed to be a no pressure reconnection with a good friend. She had been excited to see Sango again, to heal her relationship with a woman who was once her sister in many ways. She had been prepared for it to be a little awkward and uncomfortable, but this had felt like an attack.

She had tried not to resent Sango when her partnership with The Strays had fallen out and her friend had gone silent for almost a year. Inuyasha was Sango’s oldest and best friend, they were more like family. It made sense that she stayed to help him recover, to help him find his way back to reality. It still felt like she was choosing Inuyasha over her, though. While Kagome logically understood, it didn’t negate the disappointment at being so easily forgotten.

When Sango had finally reached out, she had started by apologizing over and over again. It had been difficult to deny her. They had stayed in touch during the next five years by text and the frequent phone call, but this was the first time since severing her ties with the band that she was supposed to see Sango face to face. Just a quick little stop over on her way home from vacation.

Kagome had been eager; it had been ages since she had seen Sango’s smile and laugh or felt the strong reassurance of her embrace. She had missed it and, on her way here, she had allowed herself to feel the deep loss, that hole in her life that the absence of her friend had left. And yet, she couldn’t help but feel grateful that Inuyasha had her support during such a difficult time, even if Kagome felt guilty that she couldn’t provide it. He looked… good, and, if not content, more himself.

Seeing him after all this time was such a shock. Inuyasha had filled out, his tanned skin was packed with more muscle than she had seen in a while, still tall and lean but healthy. He was magnetic; she hadn’t been prepared to steel herself against his appeal. He had the same irreverent, bad-boy look that had drawn her in the beginning, with the piercings, tattoos, and black jeans that barely clung to his slim hips, torn by his fidgeting claws rather than designer labels.  

It had been Inuyasha’s golden eyes that tugged at her heartstrings, though. They had been full of the same pain and remorse that was reflected at her each morning in the mirror, as if he had suffered every day of their separation with her. Those invisible ties that had grown slack between them had bound her once more and with it came that same fierce desire to hold him, soothe him, and to allow him to comfort her in turn, a yearning that she didn’t truly understand.

She heard the doorway to the bathroom swing open and closed. “Kagome?”   

Sango’s voice made her flinch, and she bit her lip as another frustrated tear fell down her cheek. 

“Kagome, I know you’re in here,” she said in a patient tone. 

She grit her teeth and flicked the lock, flinging the door wide open. “Of course, I’m in here,” she hissed. “I have nowhere else to escape. You made sure of that, didn’t you?”

Sango rolled her dark brown eyes. “That’s a little dramatic, isn’t it? You can leave at any time.”

“Not without making a scene,” Kagome grumbled as she stomped towards the sinks and grabbed a paper towel from the dispenser. “I’ve already made a hysterical fool of myself once today,” she said while leaning forward to dab at her smeared mascara. “Not exactly eager for a repeat.”

Sango sighed and took a step towards her. “Look, I know it was a shock to see Inuyasha—”

“Don’t.” Kagome whipped around to glare at her. “Don’t you dare come in here and argue on his behalf.”

“I’m not,” her friend replied in a shaky voice. “I’m arguing on mine.”

Kagome swallowed hard as Sango took another step closer.

“I know that I’ve said this before,” she began while staring at her hands. “But I’m sorry, that I abandoned you.”

“Sango, we’ve talked about this,” she said in a dismissive tone. “What you should be apologizing for is bringing him here with no warning.”

“I know but this is the first time I’ve seen you in person since Inuyasha…” She hesitated. “overdosed.”

Kagome pursed her lips as another tear fell from her eye.

“I didn’t want to choose sides,” Sango continued. “But then you left, and I-I couldn’t leave.”

“And I couldn’t stay,” she whispered around the lump caught in her throat. “You weren’t there. You didn’t see him or have to use your hands to keep his heart pumping. For a moment, the whole world became gray and dull, like life itself wasn’t even worth living. I never want to feel like that again, especially for someone who doesn’t love me.”

Sango stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Kagome’s trembling shoulders. “I don’t blame you for leaving.”

“I don’t blame you for staying,” she replied through sniffles. “I’m glad Inuyasha had you around.” 

“He’s doing a lot better, if you’re wondering.”

Kagome pulled back with a watery chuckle. “I thought you weren’t here to argue for him.”

“I’m not,” Sango replied with a shrug. “It’s just that, even though I’ve watched his health improve, he’s become quieter, more withdrawn than I’ve ever seen him. I just thought this would give him something to live for again. And I know if anyone can make it happen, you can.”

“I don’t know, Sango.”

“Just give him a shot,” she replied. “You don’t need to commit to anything now.”

“So what?” Kagome said with a sly grin. “Just take the music and run?”

“Why not? We already had plans today, didn’t we?”

“You don’t think that’s a little rude?”

“Serves him right for how he treated you.” Sango ducked around her and took a quick glance in the mirror, dabbing at the skin under her eyes.

Kagome did the same before she felt a nudge against her shoulder.  She met Sango’s reflected gaze.

“Remember that time in New York when we stole Inuyasha’s wallet and went to have brunch at the Ritz?”

She giggled. “How could I forget? Inuyasha was so mad, he made us pay for his meals for the rest of the trip.”

Sango rolled her eyes. “Sometimes, I wonder if he isn’t half-cat instead of dog. That asshole can sure hold onto a grudge.”

“Don’t ever let him hear you say that,” Kagome replied. 

They shared a dubious look and melted into a fit of giggles until Sango’s gaze grew tender. She swiped a few strands of hair behind Kagome’s ear.

“See? There were some good times, too.”

“I know. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss it.”

Sango smiled and pulled her into another hug. “I’m really glad you came.

“Me too, the ambush notwithstanding.” Kagome paused and pulled back, loosely gripping her friends’ elbows. “Why didn’t you tell me he was coming?”

“I wanted to see you and I didn’t want you to cancel just because of him.”

She shook her head. “I wouldn’t have canceled. To be honest, I’ve been wanting to see all of you. I just didn’t expect him to be so—”

“Dickish?”

Kagome laughed. “No, it’s just… the way he was looking at me.”

“Like he’s head over heels?”

“Don’t say that,” she scoffed. “It’s not true.”

Sango’s gaze grew serious. “You have to know that he cares about you.”

“Not really, he never made a point of showing it,” she replied.

Her friend grabbed her by the shoulders. “I know he’s screwed up in the past, but Inuyasha’s changed, Kagome. More like the guy you fell in love with and less like the playboy rockstar.”

She looked down to study her nails and remained quiet.

“You do still love him, don’t you?” Sango asked.

Kagome hesitated to answer. She should hate him, everything she knew about being a strong independent woman told her so. Inuyasha had toyed with her affections, pulling her close only to push her away. He had used her, satisfied his lust within her body only to treat her with disdain. It was hurtful, but Sango wasn’t wrong. There were good times.

The moments when they were intimate seemed to exist in a universe of their own, outside of the way he treated her in the real world. Lost in each other, Inuyasha showed a new side of himself. He was attentive, generous, and focused solely on her pleasure before his. In those sweet hours, she had felt like all that mattered. It was only afterwards that he made her feel like a mistake and that contradiction had slowly chipped away at her self-esteem.

Things were different now, though. She wasn’t the same immature girl anymore. She owned her own business, managing several different well-known clients. She owned her own home, and had just paid off her modest sedan. She had even adopted a cat. By most people’s standards she was successful, but the wounds that she had incurred back then had left lasting scars. 

Kagome didn’t open herself up to people anymore. She was friendly and polite, with many close acquaintances, but none that she considered actual friends other than Rin. She wasn’t sure she could count that one since technically she was family. Her love life was non-existent; she’d practically become a nun. No one had touched her intimately since… him .

Not that she hadn’t tried, but being in romantic situations with other men made her stomach turn. No one had touched her, held her, set her blood on fire the way that he did. It had been years since the first time they had connected in such a way, but she could still remember every detail. It was a well-trodden and comforting memory. From the first moment she was hooked; he became her drug, one that she had been in withdrawal from for the last six years.