#but kinda how i feel about the whole watcher thing. as someone who doesn’t really watch them but knew them from buzzfeed | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

spnae · 1 year ago

Text

Chapter 42 Cabin Fever

Faith brushed dirt from her hands and sat down in front of Guinevere’s fresh grave. Callum threw down the shovel Faith had pilfered from the B&B’s garden shed and sat down next to her. “You alright?”

She shrugged, “She was a Slayer and I killed her.”

Callum straightened his back, “Self defense against a crazy woman thought to have been dead long ago, who just stabbed someone you care about. You didn’t know Buffy was going to pull through.”

“That’s just it, I’m not sorry… Not for that anyway.”

“But you feel sorry for her.”

“Yeah, I guess I kinda do. I mean this whole thing was seriously messed up from the beginning. Who’s bright idea was it to lock her inside a freaking cave anyway? That thing about it being for her protection was a crock of bull.”

He looked around at the seemingly idyllic forest landscape surrounding the cottage. It looked like something out of a Disney film. “Agreed. This place screams gilded cage.”

“Probably some Watcher’s Council BS, or maybe she was already going nuts or something. Who knows.” She said plucking a blade of grass and tearing it into little pieces.

“Are you going to be alright?”

“Always am.”

He wrapped an arm around her. “Babe, it’s me. Couples therapy, remember?”

“So much more fun when you’re naked.”

Callum chuckled, “Come on, beautiful, you wanted to check out the cottage some more, might find some answers.”

She sighed and pulled herself up. “Yeah, better see if there are any more bombshells waiting for us.”

*****

Buffy pushed herself up out of bed unsteadily. She was healing well but her chest and back seared with pain at every movement. She watched Spike sleeping for a moment as she gingerly shrugged on her robe before creeping out of the room. The bathroom door at the end of the hall was open and Buffy shuffled towards it. She was feeling fairly weak after everything and wouldn’t have gotten up at all if she didn't have to use the bathroom so badly.

She stood at the sink washing her hands and examining her reflection in the mirror. She was pale and looked exhausted. There were circles under her eyes like she hadn’t slept in a week. Her breathing was still a little off but at least she was ambulatory. Barely. This was definitely worse than the wound she had suffered at the Hellmouth.

The corner of the shower curtain caught her eye in the mirror.

Mmm… hot water sounds really good— I should probably get cleaned up and check out the damage for myself…

She sighed as she shrugged off her robe and the oversized shirt she had slept in. Then turned to look at herself in the mirror. She peeled off the bandage a few inches right of her sternum. It was a testament to how much the ordeal had upset Spike since he had yet to make a joke about her being stabbed in the boob. The slash was crusted over with blood. It looked like it was a few days old and had started to heal. She proceeded to contort her arm around to pull off the bandage at her back. Using the mirror she was able to see that side was healing just as well. The hilt of the sword had left a nasty bruise.

There were two baskets on the countertop filled with tiny bottles of shampoo and conditioner. A third basket was filled with what looked like little seashell shaped homemade soaps. Buffy grabbed one of each along with a fresh washcloth and proceeded to the shower. It was just as glorious as she had hoped it would be. The wounds were raw and burned under the water but it felt so good to get clean. She washed gingerly, watching trace amounts of blood and dirt run down the drain.

Could be worse, at least it doesn’t look like the shower scene in ‘Psycho’— She thought.

By the time she got back to their room she felt like she had just finished an extensive training session with the girls. She took the towel off of her wet hair and pulled her robe tighter around herself. Then collapsed back onto the bed as smoothly as possible and let out a hiss of pain as she eased against the pillows. The wound at her back stung dully and felt like one large bruise.

Because it is one big bruise.

She shifted awkwardly as she tried to get comfortable and swore under her breath. Spike lifted his head towards her groggily, “Alright, Pet?”

“I’m fine. Just doing the healing thing.”

He turned, propped himself up on one elbow with his head in his hand, “You smell nice. Shower help?”

“Yeah. I’m feeling better. Still hurts but you know how that goes—“ she cut off with a wince of pain.

“What do you feel like doing? Do you want to head home early or take a few more days here?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it. We should probably check out the cottage again.” She said pulling the blanket back over herself.

“Faith and Callum went this morning, been gone all day as far as I know.”

She nodded, “Alright. What about phone calls? Did you call Willow?”

Spike frowned and cleared his throat, “Not yet, I thought it might be better if you talked to her.”

Buffy looked towards the clock, “Almost dinner time. I’ll call later.”

“You should definitely eat something.”

“I look like death.”

“Nonsense. I look like death and no one bats an eye.”

“You look like you should be a male pinup in some dirty magazine.”

“You say the sweetest things,” he chuckled, “but seriously, you need to eat. Sure you’re a bit peaky but just as beautiful as ever, nothing a little makeup can’t fix if you’re all that worried.”

“Gee thanks,” her voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Come on, you know I’m right.”

“Fine. can you hand me some clean clothes?”

“You need fresh bandages.”

She glanced over at the clock again, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. They are looking better but I really don’t need them popping open if I have another coughing fit or something. Dinner actually sounds like a pretty great idea right now.”

Spike rolled out of bed and grabbed a clean pair of jeans and a shirt for himself. His own wound looked significantly better than hers but he was still moving rather stiffly.

“How are you feeling?” She asked.

“I’m alright, Pet. Bit tender, but then I don’t have to breathe so there’s that,” he said as he pulled his shirt on gingerly and went to get Buffy’s clothes out of her bag. He tossed them onto the bed next to her before grabbing the first aid kit.

Buffy slipped her robe off of her shoulders and Spike raised his eyebrows when he saw the wounds.

“Well, at least it’s starting to close a little.”

“Yeah, it’s not as bad as yesterday, still hurts like a bitch.”

“I hear you on that one.”

Spike moved around to her back laying a cool hand on her shoulder as he applied a fresh bandage. When he finished he ran his fingers down her arms, kissing her neck.

Buffy inhaled sharply at his tender caress and started to cough a little. “Sorry, Love,” he murmured as he moved back around to her front. He shook his head as he secured the bandage, “Likely to leave a scar.”

“Guess it’s a good thing my boyfriend thinks my scars are sexy.” She smirked.

“Bloody well right they are,” he crooned and leaned in to kiss her.

Buffy slowly pulled back from the kiss, “Humm, yeah, better not start anything we can’t finish.”

He pushed her clothes towards her, “Better put these on then.”

“Any idea what they are serving for dinner tonight?” She asked as she started to dress herself.

He sniffed the air, “Hard to tell over your soap but I’m thinking it smells a bit like a curry,” he answered as he helped her with her shirt.

“Sounds good.”

*****

Faith had spent the past couple of hours going through the cabin and more specifically the things in Guinevere’s bedroom. Her room was the most orderly place on the entire second level. It was also the only room they had found so far that didn’t have any drawings on the walls. The only thing that really stuck out was the enormous bookcase along one wall that was completely filled with journals and sketchbooks. They were stacked on top of the bookcase until they reached the ceiling. There were no other books. Not one.

This is a job for the brains… I can’t do this shit…

Faith thought as she flipped through one of the journals.

She scoffed and went back out into the hall behind Callum who had brought his camera along and was now taking pictures of the drawings covering the walls in the upstairs hallway. The drawings looked like they were done in charcoal from the fireplace. It looked as though Guinevere had tried to wash them down a few times but had started over again. Most of the drawings were of things that happened years before she and Buffy were called but a few looked familiar. One such drawing looked remarkably like Angelus and it made Faith shudder.

Another drawing showed a depiction of what was clearly mayor Wilkins turning into a giant snake. She had been in a coma at the time and had only heard about the events after. Although, surprisingly, it wasn’t half as bad as seeing the Beast she had faced in LA just after she broke out of prison; when Angel had lost his soul.

There was even a scene depicting Angelus feeding off of her. She had nearly died from the substance she had injected into herself in order to knock him out. It had ended up being an odd bonding experience for them in the end. It was strange and more than a little unnerving to see it on the wall like that.

Faith sat down on the floor staring at the drawings.

Callum lowered his camera and looked down at her, “You alright, darling?”

She didn’t respond immediately, “All of this is just seriously freaking weird. Like scenes from my life and it’s just really nuts-o-plenty.”

“I can imagine. I don’t know how I’d feel if it were me.” He shrugged, “Did you see the one in the bedroom at the end? There’s one with a guy collapsed over a cross, I swear it looks like Spike from the back. Got the hair anyway. It’s really freaky.”

“Yeah it really does. What did you think of the ice monster one?”

Callum shrugged, “Bit over the top aesthetically, speaking. Looks like a giant icicle thing with claws and teeth.”

Faith had to laugh, “Yeah pretty much. Got to say I’m kind of glad I haven’t had to fight that one. Not really a fan of the whole snow and ice-mountain cave-dweller scene. And what’s with the Yeti looking thing with the box?”

“You’re the expert here.”

“Right—“ she gave him a skeptic look and shrugged it off.

“What do you make of that one?” He asked, pointing to his left. Most of the drawings there were so corrupted by intersecting lines, neither of them could figure out what they were supposed to be.

“Not a clue, most of this looks like complete garbage. Make sure you get pictures of everything though.”

“On it, Lass.”

“Did you have a chance to check out those last two rooms?”

“Ahh, I got the one on the left you already checked out . Not much in there, in the way of artwork. You already saw the two sets of bunk beds without mattresses. Kinda looks like she just piled stuff up in there that reminded her of her family,” His shoulders dropped a little, “This place is bloody depressing.”

She crossed her arms over her chest as she scanned her eyes over the walls. “Giles would blow his intellectual wad in here. Probably wouldn’t be able to get him to shut up about the place.”

“Trust me, if it weren’t for the creep-factor I’d probably be right along with him.”

“Yeah well I’m going to check out that last room.”

Faith padded down the hallway a little. The door opened a crack and she gasped when the sight of a woman met her; before she realized it was yet another drawing. The room had been completely cleared out. Every reachable surface had been drawn on. Black lines of charcoal covered nearly every inch.

The drawing of the woman that had first caught her attention, took up about half of one wall. She was thin, dark haired and wore a white empire waist gown with blood dripping down the front of her. She was surrounded by children of various ages, and fire.

A wall of blood red fire stood behind the figures in the drawing. It was one of the only drawings that had any color added and Faith realized with a jolt that it was probably blood. Maybe from one of the animals Guinevere had killed.

Faith pulled herself away from the intense stare of the two dimensional woman to examine the rest of the drawings. Demons in all shapes and sizes dotted the walls. A flayed man bound between two trees. Another man arched in pain as light shot out of his eyes and mouth obscuring his features. A woman with blonde hair that looked like it could be Buffy, punching her fist into a demonic Frankenstein’s monster. There was an odd image of a woman floating, dressed in all black with black hair and eyes and unnerving black veins running across her exposed skin.

Faith had no way of knowing if most of these drawings were from the past, present, or future. She had heard stories about Willow going dark and wondered if the last drawing could possibly be her.

Callum walked in, disrupting her thoughts, “Bloody hell—“ he breathed, “Glad I brought extra film.”

“You’re not kidding.”

He pointed towards the picture that had originally caught Faith’s eye, “Who do we think that is?”

Faith frowned, “That would be Spike’s ex.”

*****

Buffy and Spike had just gone into the great room after dinner when Faith and Callum returned to the Inn. Buffy was starting to feel significantly better after getting some food in her stomach. Spike had been right to insist she eat.

Faith plopped down on the couch next to Buffy, jostling the cushions and making Buffy wince.

She turned to glare at her, “Easy, bouncing Betty.”

“Sorry about that B, kind of a rough day.”

“How so? What did you guys find?”

Callum sat in a wingback chair next to the spot Spike had taken up on its twin in front of the unlit fireplace.

Faith sighed and shifted further into the cushions, “Well, we took care of Guinevere and checked out her graffiti. It’s really extensive, there is so much crap to go through there.”

Spike leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs. “Anything of note?”

“Lots. Some of it was stuff I know already happened. Like she was having Slayer dreams about us. I really don’t believe she didn’t know Slayers were still around. I really think she was playing us from the get-go.”

Buffy hugged a throw pillow to her chest, “I wondered when you first told us about the drawings. It’s really wiggy.”

“She had to have known.”

“Maybe it sort of added to driving her round the bend.” Callum suggested, “Don’t forget bout the journals and the sketchbooks we found too.”

“Ohh yeah, thanks babe. Yeah she had like hundreds of these things on a big bookshelf in her bedroom. I only flipped through a couple of them but she was definitely losing it for a while.”

“It doesn’t surprise me,” Buffy frowned.

Faith turned back to Buffy, “I had Callum get pictures of all of it. And we grabbed a few of the journals for Giles but there are too many of them to even think about taking with us.”

“At least we have the sword and we can get back in. I’m sure Giles is going to want to check it out.”

“Probably. But one thing at a time. We’re going to have to get the film developed when we get back. I can tell you one thing though,” she rolled her head towards Spike, “there’s one hell of a portrait of your ex in there.”

Spike shifted forward a little more, “Dru?”

“Oh yeah. Looking real creepy with a bunch of kids around her and all this blood dripping down. It’s freaky.”

“Well that tracks. She always did have a thing for kids.” His tone was matter of fact, he wasn’t surprised in the slightest.

“Not helping the creep factor here,” Faith groused.

“Anything else?”

Faith adjusted herself on the couch, “Not a clue really. You figure some of those drawings could be almost as old as the cabin. I only know the ones that I either lived through or heard stories about. Like this one that looks like it could be Willow when she went all dark-side, but I couldn’t tell you if that already happened or if she’s going to go dark again.”

Buffy frowned at that, “Will has been doing really well with the magic stuff but this thing with Kennedy—“

“Yeah what’s going on with that bitch anyway?” Faith asked.

“As long as she’s still in Australia and far far away from Willow and my sister, I don’t really care.”

“You better be careful she doesn’t come back round. My sister-in-law had that problem with her ex before my brother. Sort of how they met, actually.”

“I know Giles has connections in Australia; they are supposed to be keeping tabs on her.”

Callum raised his eyebrows and glanced over at Spike, “Probably for the best I take it?”

“Any more trouble out of her and I’ll happily rip her throat out.”

“Never did get that third notch did you?” Faith said.

He smirked, “Oh I got my notch alright. Brought the house down.”

Buffy blushed, “Oh my word, do you have to bring that up?”

“Don’t care what you say, Pet. You don’t forget your first time, especially when we started out on the ground floor and ended up in the basement. God, that was a fun night.”

Callum bit back a laugh, “Now I understand why you laughed at me for breaking the bed.”

“Wow, B, didn’t know you had it in you.”

“How’bout all the furniture I had to replace in my old crypt?” He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Buffy glared at Spike, “You are—“ Doing this on purpose.

You bet I am, Slayer. Know it’s gonna be a bit before you’re up to anything, got to keep things interesting.

She rolled her eyes at his smirk, “Anyway… enough about our sex-life; what are you two up to tonight?”

“I could definitely use a drink or twelve,” Faith answered.

“Absolutely,” Callum stood, extending his hand towards her, “can I buy you a drink, beautiful?”

She let him pull her up, “You know it.”

Buffy let out a tired sigh, “I have some serious phone calls to make, I guess.”

Faith turned toward her as Callum wrapped an arm around her waist, “You still haven’t checked in with Giles and Willow?”

“No, not yet.”

Faith snorted, “Good luck with that.”

“Gee, thanks.” Buffy pouted a little.

“Giles can wait a bit can’t he?” Spike asked.

She sighed, “Yeah, I won’t be able to get him off the phone if I mention Queenie. I definitely need to call Will and Dawn though. Get her filled in and make sure everything is alright there. Go on, you three go get your drink on, I’ll be phone-call girl.”

Spike leaned forward taking her hand, “Doesn’t seem fair.”

Buffy shrugged a shoulder, “I’m not really feeling the drinks tonight. I’m actually thinking more sleep.”

“Probably do you some good, Love.”

*****

The inn had a small bar at the back of the dining room. The three of them sidled up to the bar, Faith sitting between the two men.

“How is B doing, I mean really?” Faith asked abruptly.

“She’s alright. Don’t think it’s all sunk in just yet.”

Callum raised a finger in the air to get the bartender’s attention, “Could we get a bottle of whiskey and three glasses here?”

“Straight to the point. Can see why you like this one, Doe-eyes,” Spike said as the bartender set down the glasses and retrieved a bottle of whiskey.

“It’s not the only reason but it’s definitely a perk.”

“I bet,” Spike gave a weak chuckle and shook his head, “this little trip has gone a bit sideways, hasn't it?” he added as the bartender set the bottle down in front of them and started to pour.

Callum chuckled darkly and took his glass, “Never a dull moment with you lot, I’ll say that.”

“I’ll drink to that. Cheers, mate.”

“Cheers,” Callum and Faith echoed.

The three of them shot back their drinks and clunked them down onto the bar before Spike refilled them.

“So what now?” Callum asked.

“Probably just finish out our long weekend here and head home. Don’t think Buffy is too keen to head back early and should be just about healed by then.”

“Brilliant. It’ll give me a chance to paint the view.”

Spike snorted into his shot glass.

Callum grabbed the bottle and refilled Spike’s glass, “What’s that? You going to write us a sonnet?”

“Piss off,” he muttered, biting back a grin. He had to admit, it was nice having another guy around he could call a friend.

“Do I need to leave you two creative types alone?” Faith smirked, downing another drink.

“Oh is that what you think?” Callum laughed as he wrapped an arm around her waist, “Cheeky one, you are,” he pulled her into a kiss, delving deep and leaving her breathless.

“Wow,” Faith sounded dazed when she spoke.

Spike downed another shot, “Maybe it’s me that should leave the two of you alone.”

“You’re good. Promise to save it for the bedroom, mate,” he squeezed her to him, “Right darlin’?”

“Might be time for us to turn in.”

“I probably shouldn’t make a night of it anyway. No telling how things are gonna go if Buffy gets into things with Dawn. Bit’s libel to take it badly.” He paused looking at his glass and filled it again, drinking it quickly.

He was more than a little apprehensive about what this all meant for their relationship. On one hand he was overjoyed with the prospect of having her by his side indefinitely but at the same time he worried about how she would handle watching her loved ones grow old and die. He had never really had that problem but he was sure she would.

“Girl can be savage when she wants to be.” Faith commented.

“Got that right,” he downed another shot and slid from his stool slapping some money down, “I’m going to see how she’s faring.”

*****

When Spike got up to their room, Buffy was in her pajamas and sitting up on the bed with her phone in her hand. She glanced up at him when he came in and he immediately noticed her yes were slightly red at the corners.

“Alright, Slayer? You get through to Roam?”

Buffy cleared her throat, “I talked to Willow.”

He strode over to sit with her, watching her intently. “What is it?”

Buffy shook her head, “I hum, I sort of chickened out.”

“You didn’t call?”

Her voice was rough, “I did. I talked to Willow, checked in on the Rome situation with Kennedy being gone. Violet has sort of taken over, who would have thought huh?”

It was clear she was stalling. “Timid little ginger right?”

“Yeah. Turns out she’s kind of a natural leader, just needed a confidence boost.”

Spike nodded, it was always good to have an update but he couldn’t let her change the subject either. “Good for her but what about Red? What’s going on there?”

She twisted her hands together around her phone, still clutching it, “Oh I got her all filled in no problem. Told her everything we know so far and then— I asked to talk to Dawn. Spike, I completely froze. I don’t even know why. I was doing fine and then when I heard her voice—- I just couldn’t tell her what happened. I started babbling about the B&B; what a nice room we have. I sort of tried to push past the freak-out and started to tell her about the cave but then I just made it sound like we went sightseeing or whatever. It was so stupid.”

Spike pulled her into him, letting her rest her head in the crook of his neck. “This hasn’t exactly been a lovely seaside holiday, Pet. Point of fact I’m not surprised in the least. You’ve been through a lot, we all have. You’re so used to just gettin’ right back up no matter what knocks you down like some sodding punch-clown. You’re still human, sweetheart.”

“Am I?” It was almost a whisper.

He had half expected her to say something like this but it still struck him like a kick to the stomach. “Course you are, Love. You’re just a little something extra. Like a hot fudge sundae with whipped cream and a cherry on top.”

Buffy snorted a tiny laugh, “You’re such an idiot.”

“Yeah but you love me so what’s that say about you?”

“As long as we get to be idiots together.”

“Always.”

#buffy the vampire slayer #buffy fanfic #fanfic #spuffy #bound

2 notes · View notes

raichett · 2 years ago

Text

Watcher

More Watcher-themed flash fic, lol. Warnings for some eldritch imagery and implied standard unhappy Watcher backstory for Grian, but nothing graphic.

This flash fic can also be found on AO3 here.

–

WATCHER

“It’s kinda funny that you don’t remember,” Scar tells Grian, baiting his interest, exactly one week to the day after their return. “Seeing as you are way more experienced with this whole thing than me.”

Grian blinks, then tilts his head, confused. His hands lift away from the shulker box he was about to pick up. In his other vision, Scar can see a few of Grian’s other eyes start to rove around, seeking the answer to the question Grian poses next. “Remember what?”

Void. He’s so – clueless. Oblivious. Scar shudders a little; he knows that he barely knows Grian’s true power, but all his new-fangled instincts, ruffled by the recent lack of recognition, are insisting upon shivering submission to a more powerful Watcher. To think that such could happen to someone whose might he has seen but a candle flame of, compared to the bonfire it truly is…

“You really don’t have any idea, do you?” Scar remarks, knowing the answer already. He presses his eyes tightly closed against his skin, folding his array of wings against his soul. Grian would see, if he knew to look, but right now him not knowing to suspect is what’s gotten Scar this far.

But even a week is too long, to not enlighten his soulmate. To be - alone. Abandoned, unknowingly or not.

Grian’s withering side-eye is more frightful now that Scar can perceive its many layers beneath his cute little flesh puppet. “Scar, c’mon, tell me,” Grian says, making his voice the nosy but kind whine of a good friend. “Tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me – ”

Scar opens two of his new eyes, one either side of him, hovering above his shoulders. Grian snaps into silence, staring, suddenly-dozens of slit pupils contracting in fear. A multitude of wings rustle, swinging out in preparation on another plane. For fight? For flight? Scar is not yet good enough at Watcher body language to gauge it.

“Scar…?” Grian breathes out, horrified. He stumbles forward, his body jerking on its strings, far from the smooth manipulation Scar’s seen many a time, even if he hadn’t known the performance then for what it was.

“I’m this way because of you,” Scar says, not accusatory, exactly, but firmly still, making sure that there is no mistaking the origin of his change. Grian looks sick anyway, and Scar’s heart – no longer needed as it once was, but it’s still his – softens, as it always does, for him. “You didn’t do this intentionally,” he adds, trying to balm whatever wound he just sliced. “But it still happened.”

“I don’t – ” Grian swallows, sucks in a breath, and then a few of his great wings shuffle and extend, coming to curl loosely around Scar’s sides. Comforting, caring, protecting, his new instincts cry, some hard and cold shard of ice inside of him warming and dislodging at the show of – friendship, companionship, solidarity, some strange feeling that Scar thinks to name as flock. “What – what happened?”

Instinctually, Scar’s own wings unfurl, small and downy and clearly immature, but still spreading upwards to brush his feathers against Grian’s, responding positively to his soulmate’s gesture. “You don’t remember,” he repeats. “They made you not remember.”

You don’t remember doing this for me before. How many nights we spent in the nest inside the Red Velvet Keep, your wings curled around me.

“Who?” Grian snarls, wings flexing, more eyes open than he ever has here in Hermitcraft searching now with newfound rage.

“The Watchers,” Scar answers, quietly. “We were – void, we were taken, set up in a little enclosed world of theirs, and made to play one of their games.”

Grian clearly expects something close to this answer, because he doesn’t seem surprised. His face twists. “Scar…” He’s in front of Scar now, and his hands are on Scar’s shoulders, tugging him closer. An embrace. Scar flings his arms around Grian and returns it wholeheartedly.

You taught me how to open my eyes and then how to shut them, how to prevent it all from being just too much.

“We were bound together,” Scar explains into Grian’s hair. “Soulmates. We shared pain, healing, hunger. We started to take on… traits of each other. Yours were just – a little more potent than most.”

You told me the truth of what you are, when our hearts and souls were so intertwined that we were bleeding together at the edges.

“I’m sorry,” Grian mumbles into Scar’s neck. “I’m so, so sorry this – that this happened. Void, and they took my memories? Must’ve been Greater Watchers, more than one, to do so to me…”

“I know,” Scar says. “You told me.” He tries not to sound wobbly, but – this is his soulmate, this is a member of his flock. And it’s nothing but fact that a fledgling, created a Watcher or transformed so, needs their flock around them.

Grian’s hands fist into Scar’s clothes at the reminder. He lets out a low croon and Scar’s answering chirp – escaped from his throat before he can reel it back in – settles the matter.

“We’re flock,” Grian says, factually, a little surprised. “I – took you in as flock.” Suddenly self-conscious, he hastily says, “Of course I did, I wouldn’t have left you, I just – ”

“Haven’t had a flock in a while,” Scar finishes. Grian had escaped his last one more than he had left it, but Scar knows only the barest of bones of that story. At the time, there had been far more pressing concerns, and Grian’s honesty still too new to share overmuch.

Grian nods. “Yeah… yeah.” He straightens up, leaning back, stares Scar right in the eyes. “C’mon,” he says, “let’s go back to my base. I’ve got a nest to expand.”

Scar beams, delighted, and so, so relieved. “Thank you,” he says. “Um, I mean, I didn’t want to presume, but – ”

Grian looks at him, his gaze heavy. “You need to nest with flock,” he says, something that Scar knows Grian had far less of a good time with than he has had with Grian. “And besides, your story isn’t over yet.”

“True, true,” Scar says, faltering. “Um. It’s not a happy one.”

“Ones involving Watchers rarely are,” Grian says, angry and sad and reaching for Scar’s hand. “In… in your own time, then. I’m here for you. I promise. I’ll teach you as best I can.”

“I know,” Scar whispers. “I know.”

After all, you taught me our most important skill, no matter how much you despise it, how much you hated conducting the lessons:

You taught me how to watch.

#my writing #flash fic #double life #grian #watcher grian #goodtimeswithscar #desert duo #hermitcraft

95 notes · View notes

getbeyondthebooks · 2 years ago

Text

Mike’s focus in S4

I’ve been thinking about this insistently for a while now, but I kept dismissing the thought because I had no time to put my suspicions together. I wanna try now.

So, listen, I know that we always talk about how S4 shows us Will’s POV and makes it a point to hammer his feelings and reactions in our mind: the camera constantly pans to him to show his expression to us, especially during moments between Mike and El, in a way that never lets us forget he’s there. This seasons, we are literally forced to think about Will during any California scene related to Mike. We are made conscious of him and what he would think of everything that happens, especially when Mileven is on screen.

Do you know who else is been shown to be concious of him?

You guessed it.

Mike.

And while we aren’t actually given access to any of Mike’s thoughts, I’ve been insistently feeling like I’ve been wearing his shoes this season.

That the reason why the camera and focus has turned to Will continuously throughout it, showing us his reactions, is because Mike’s focus is continuosly on him.

Mike keeps thinking of Will.

Especially when he’s with El.

From the very first moment they meet at the airport, through Rink-o-Mania, we are shown Will “moping,” “rolling his eyes”, and we think Mike doesn’t notice because Will thinks he doesn’t, but he does.

So I’ve begun to think about the differences between putting focus on something and using someone’s point of view in film. Unfortunately I’m not studying film or anything so I won’t even try to make it sound coherent or professional, but I do believe that even as an uneducated watcher (which some media literacy) there is something i can do, which is feel.

I am supposed to feel, in fact. I thought that was the only thing that the Duffers were doing by consistently showing me Will. I thought they were making me feel for Will, while keeping Mike’s pov completely hidden from me. But then, the more I thought about Mike and about the little we got from him, the more it felt like this whole thing was more than just us getting the story told from Will pov. Some of it literally puts him into focus where he shouldn’t be, but the scene itself is not quite through his eyes...

The two instances that immediately come to mind are the moment Mike and El reunite and Mike’s monologue, especially.

When Mike and El reunite, we got blurry Will standing between them in the background. We cannot forget about him and we are led to think “oh no, poor Will, is he okay?”. The fact that he’s blurry, contrary to Robin being completely in focus in the parallel scene with Viki, stands out to me too. Because why are we led to think that, but we aren’t able to see him until Mike and El turn towards him?

Do you know who would perceive Will that way during that moment? Mike.

Mike reunited with El and they didn’t kiss and the scene is shot in a way that makes me feel like I AM Mike and I know Will is RIGHT THERE and I don’t know what he’s thinking (yet) but I’m so conscious of his presence I cannot comfortably reunite with my girlfriend.

While the scene is not actually shot through Mike’s eyes, it feels like i’m wearing his shoes right then... does that make sense? Perhaps I’m projecting, but even during his monologue, the way he hesitates when everyone knows what he’s supposed to say, the way he turns to Will and the way the scene is shot in a way that constantly includes Will as Mike speaks makes me feel like this is the same way Mike feels.

He’s in the scene, but the focus of his thoughts? Will.

Mike was introduced to us as our MC in the first seasons, and watching these scenes I wonder if that isn’t what he’s still. Yes, his exact thoughts are concealed, but his focus isn’t lost on us.

Throughout the series we have already been shown that Mike’s priority has always kinda been Will. Even in S3 when Mike is supposed to be obsessed with El, he doesn’t really despair when they break up, but it takes one fight with Will to have him biking across town in the rain. I think S4 somehow cements that in a very subtle way through directing choices.

Does it mean I think Mike knows about Will’s feelings for him? No. I think he’s oblivious to them, because he’s too wrapped up in his own. But is he conscious of Will? Oh yes. He cannot ignore him. Not even when he’s having a moment with his girlfriend. He’s constantly aware of Will. The same way we are made to be concious of Will too.

I’m more and more convinced that we have gotten more about how Mike feels than we realize during this season. And it was mostly through directing choices.

Again, I might be projecting, but I can’t stop thinking about it.

If my theory about Mike not dealing with IH but dealing with a oh-god-i-have-feelings-for-my-best-friend freak out is true, this would make so much sense...

(for the record i’m @you-usuratonkachi and also @bumiesworld, i just keep using the wrong side blogs to talk about stuff, i should have just kept a single personal one, but me 10 years ago had more patience for this stuff than i do now)

#byler #i've definitely written too much to say nothing at all #tldr i think the reason why the whole triangle situation focuses so much on will is because mike is focused on will #we just don't get to know what mike thinks yet #the only logical step forward is the queer love twist #i'm telling you #they built them up too well for it to not happen

53 notes · View notes

cloudy-leonhart · 4 years ago

Text

AOT veterans with a Filipino S/O!!

[author note: did I write this as soon as I posted the first part?? yes. I like writing for this, it’s so fun lolol up next, Marleyan Warriors!!]

Summary: not much, just the AOT vets with their filipino S/O.

Gender Neutral Reader.

Recommended Song: Buwan - Juan Karlos.

Theme: Fluff, Modern AU.

TW: Swearing.

Characters: Hange, Levi, Miche, Erwin, Moblit, Nanaba.

Hange Zöe

Honestly they fully immersed themselves in your culture, as you know Hange LOVES learning about new things, discovering about your culture, they probably forced you to go the Philippines with them.

They started asking people for directions in english?? You had to step in translate for them, in which they responded to ask to teach them the language.

Yes they keep a small notebook of words they think are interesting. Yes even swear words are in there, not to mention they absolutely just butcher the way you say it.

One time when you both came back, Hange told Erwin that Bakla was a word for a good man, and they laughed their asses off watching Erwin tell people he was Bakla LMFAO.

They actually visited your province, they met your family and was surprised at the fact that they owned a whole farm, they tried to learn with your siblings on how to harvest rice, they nailed it btw.

they named your carabao, Sawney, and your chicken, Bean.

And respectfully so, your family started to call their animals by the name Hange gave them.

They started to cry about the fact that you guys had to go back, and like every time, your mom and dad encouraged y’all to bring filipino snacks back home, in which you did, because you knew that you’d probably miss it when you flew back home.

You guys have a tradition of going to the Philippines for your guys’ anniversary.

THEY SUPRISINGLY LISTENS TO FILIPINO MUSIC

They were the one to suggest Aegis to Levi but they prefer someone like Jireh Lim.

Favourite song is probably, Buko. They love the guitar in it.

Levi Ackerman

He first found out you were Filipino when he caught you packing a balikbayan box for your family back home, (for those who don’t know, balikbayan box is a box full of your country’s snacks to send back to the PH for your family to try.)

He had asked you what it was, and you answered that it was for your family back in the Philippines, in which he responded with helping you, and mainly scolding you about the way you packed it.

“Idiot, pack it like this, so you have more space to place stuff.”

When he first went to the Philippines, he first noticed the cleanliness of the hotels, he looked at you with a ‘is this why you’re so good at cleaning?’ look.

God when I say your parents loved him, YOUR PARENTS ABSOLUTELY ADORED HIM. He would clean for your mom, and not only that, your mom approved of his cleaning technique, yes she told you to marry him that second.

And that you did, you had your first wedding with you family in the Philippines, and another in where you guys currently lived.

Bye, he absolutely looks AMAZING in a Barong. Your dad helped him slick his hair back.

Your mom and him, bonded of cleaning, sometimes when your mom needs help removing rust on her pans, she calls Levi.

like Hange he and you go to the Philippines for y’alls anniversary.

Please save this man from the streets, I’m not saying it to be mean but this man almost gave his wallet to a bunch of kids who were hungry.

You gave money instead because you didn’t want your man to be broke lmfao.

He loves seeing you so happy while you’re in the Philippines, he just thinks it’s adorable when you speak your language.

Aegis listener, absolutely no discussion, mans listens to them while cleaning, he listens to “Sayang Na Sayang” religiously.

when Aegis plays in the house, you know it’s a cleaning day lmao.

Erwin Smith

Please, remember when I said Hange told him bakla was a word for a good man, yes, that’s how he found out you were Filipino, you literally was so dumbfounded, you waited for him in the living room, your friend’s laughing over the phone, man thought he did something wrong until..

“Erwin, can you tell me why you’ve been telling your friends you’re fucking gay??”

Yeah he’s got trust issues now. But he wasn’t that shocked to find out you were filipino, he just thinks it’s neat, he butchers pronouncing shit, he tries to learn filipino jokes??? It’s really bad, like you need to stop him from telling your family to save HIM from embarrassment.

He knows how to cook barbecue lmfao, he sits at your family’s barbecue spot and cooks for them, your dad appreciates the help so much lmao, also he loves drinking the gulaman whenever he’s there, your dad gives it to him for free because, he basically considers Erwin his son now. His awkward, barbecue-cooking, son.

You guys go on hiking in Mt. Butalao, yes you sneak peeks when he’s climbing because his muscles flex, and he sweats. You guys go on a double hiking date with Miche and his S/O all the time.

He was kind of fearful when you went to a province to get in touch with your grandparents, he watched you help their carabao back into their pens, he’s scared of carabaos, don’t blame him-

Surprisingly he’s as good as your dad in basketball, bye I just know the women of your community comes to watch him, he’s ripped, you’re jealous but you don’t say it lmao.

He’s got those jeep keychains lmfao, the fact that he kinda looked like a lost puppy when you’re traveling, like so many people, so little space-

please educate him, he’s confused on everything-

he probably listens to Eraserheads, Huwag Mo Nang Itanong. Yes his ultimate song.

Miche Zacharias

probably the only veteran that knows what to do?? Beside Moblit?? He knows how to bless, he knows to call your parents nanay and tatay. He also loves going to where there’s a lot of Filipino street food because he loves the smell, he prefers the smell of bananaque over anything, hotcakes are a close second.

mf was scared when your mom suddenly said, “Oh yeah, I kept your childhood spider.”

YOU OWNED A MF SPIDER?? You were all like ‘omg i miss him’ he was a little scared bitch omg.

You had to explain that you would buy them from the local toy store and you and your friends would make them fight each other to the death.

HE THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE SMALL- IT’S A WHOLE MF TARANTULA BYE

you know those dyed chicks you get from winning a game, yeah, he was attached to one you guys won, but as always, they weren’t going to live long, I think he sulked for a whole 2 days. He named the chick Richard AHAHA.

ah yes, absolute unit in basketball, yes you and Erwin’s S/O would watch them play basketball together with your guys’ dads. Yes y’all gossiped about how hot they were in tagalog.

Just saying, Miche got some that night.

He doesn’t fit in tricycles- neither does he fit in jeepneys lmfao- he kinda has to sit on the ground if you force him to fit, in which he has to awkwardly crawl to get out lmfao.

He literally looks godly while hiking, you guys don’t go to your parents’ house when you first arrive, you guys hike.

You guys go whenever y’all feel like it honestly.

“hey hey, reader, Mahal Kita.”

He listens to anything in filipino honestly, he likes chill filipino songs like Tell Me Where It Hurts by MYMP.

Moblit Berner

He’s a researcher, he makes sure he doesn’t disrespect the culture.

he knows to bless and all that jazz like Miche.

Wait but your family loved him as soon as you told them he was a doctor lmfao?? He’s in nursing.

He’s basically already apart of the family, all your little siblings call him kuya Moblit, he absolutely thinks it’s adorable.

when you guys are sending a balikbayan box, he places toys he bought for your little siblings in the box, with a note written and translated by you for them.

Moblit also knows about poverty in the Philippines, he’s apart of an organization where they give to those who can’t afford real food, even when he’s back home with you, he donates from abroad, everyone knows him as the generous kuya.

honestly I can see him as someone who’s also known by your community, people call him kuya Moblit or tito Moblit, it’s very wholesome when a kid asks him to carry them.

This man looks so nice and kind on the outside but when you guys are at your tita’s bday party and there’s a whole mf buffet, he’s a whole beast.

You know when your uncles have like, food stacked on their plate, and like a cup of buko pandan at the side?? yes, him. definitely.

He’s kinda like sasha in this au, he loves the food so much, he probably finished a filipino dish by himself (it’s the palabok)

he’s also a god at making ice candy?? like he’s so good at filling up the plastic with the liquid lmao.

you guys adopted a stray dog in the community and his name was Moblit, your family takes care of him while you guys are back home.

genuinely, it’s mostly wholesome with him, he doesn’t really do anything wrong besides butchering pronounciation.

Moblit probably watches boxing with your dad though, it’s just too accurate not to be true.

More of a movie watcher than a song listener, his favourite movie so far is Four Sisters and A Wedding.

he cries every filipino movie, them do it to you.

Seven Sundays, he cried for days straight.

Nanaba

Nanaba found a filipino flag from your collage years in a box, asked you about it, then encouraged you to visit the Philippines because she wanted to meet your family.

Okay but your family thought she was a guy because of her hair??

your siblings can’t say Nanaba, so they call her Ate Nana.

She was kind of jealous of your bond with your family, she knows she shouldn’t be, but she couldn’t help it since her and her father’s relationship absolutely sucked.

And you know this, you had talked with her about it too, it was kinda like a, “are you okay?” and “it’s nothing.”

You had to drag her out to family events, eventually, she started to feel like she was apart of the family, she went swimming with the fam, did karaoke nights, she was basically in the family now.

She felt really happy that you decided to help her educate herself in your culture, and that your family openly accepted her into your family.

when you and her married, she wore a baro’t saya for the wedding reception and she looked absolutely gorgeous in them. She took your last name.

Your mom taught her to do the tinikling dance, and she mastered it easily, you of course danced with her.

she kinda had a guilty pleasure of going to McDonalds in the Philippines, SOLELY FOR THE ROOT BEER FLOAT, that stuff be bussin.

she forces you to go to McD’s whenever’s there’s a new flavour released.

Nanaba loves going on the jeepney, she likes the fact that you ring a bell when you have to get off and she does it every time you guys use a jeep for transportation.

Nanaba knows one word in filipino and that’s Mahal, she uses it so weirdly though, but she’s adorable so you let it pass.

“Reader..erm, I mahal?? you?..”

she’s both a listener and a movie watcher, she listens to more modern filipino singers, like Patch Quiwa.

Favourite movie is when Vice Ganda’s in it, she just thinks all his movies are funny.

174 notes · View notes

goddessofmischief · 4 years ago

Text

Blue Monday, Chapter 12 - Loki Laufeyson x Reader

Read chapters 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 8, 9, 10 & 11!

Author’s Note: It’s been a long time coming, but we’re in the endgame now! There will be only a few chapters left after this one.

...

“What do we do?”

It was a simple enough question, you knew. You had just discovered that Mobius - your boss, your trusted mentor - was plotting against you.

Either that, or Loki was.

Though somehow, it seemed infinitely preferable to you that it was Mobius. If Loki truly had betrayed you... well, you just couldn’t take it.

“We’ll go, of course,” said Loki. “Mobius has us on a leash - as long as he lives, we are bound to him. We both signed our souls over, Y/N, the very moment we signed that contract. The only thing left to do is confront him.”

“Travel by Tesseract?”

“No. We’ll take the Bifrost. If Mobius is plotting against us, it would be unwise to arrive via his method of transportation. We have to catch him off-guard.”

You nodded, mind racing.

“Alright, alright... we’ve just got to get to the Bifrost, then-”

“Easier said than done. The Bifrost is guarded by a soldier called Heimdall. He’ll know that I’m a time-traveler immediately. There’s no possibility he’ll let us through.”

“What if we could distract him?”

“I can’t imagine a distraction large enough that it could distract a man who can survey the entirety of the universe in a single glance.”

You thought, carefully.

“What if there were two Amoras?”

...

“This is an awful plan,” Loki muttered, striding beside you.

“It’s a wonderful plan. Heimdall will be distracted by the impossibility of the situation, and he’ll have to come look -- then we can sneak away.”

Loki nodded.

“It makes sense on paper, doesn't it? But these things never seem to work as well in practice.”

“Yes. True.”

“And besides... Amora was a fearsome warrior, love. She could kill you. How do you expect to fight her?”

You shrugged.

“I’ve got her sword, haven’t I? Without that... I imagine we’ll be equals.”

...

You were dead wrong.

You’d only been looking at Amora - who, you had to admit, did look quite a bit like you - for all of six minutes, and she was the most terrifyingly intense person you’d ever witnessed.

“And you’re sure you’re ready for this, darling?” Loki asked again.

“Yes,” you said, quietly. “I was born ready.”

With a final squeeze of his hand, you strode up to the warrior.

“Amora!” you shouted. “Of Asgard!”

You had gotten her attention, you knew - and she stared through you, with piercing eyes.

“You are myself, I see.”

“I am more yourself than you are,” you taunted, and Loki arched an eyebrow. You could almost hear his thoughts:

What are you doing?

Enough small talk!

Make her mad!

You cleared your throat.

“I am yourself, Amora. And I have come to take what is mine. I’ve already got your sword-” you swung Kursebreaker for extra effect. “How about your betrothed?”

Amora growled, and with identical grimaces, the two of you faced off against each other.

“I will destroy you,” she promised.

You smiled.

“You may try.”

She lunged in your direction, and to your surprise, the sword seemed to do all the work for you. You blocked her kicks and her punches, and even managed to knock her to the ground.

That is, until, someone tossed her a staff.

She beat you to the ground, and you began to collapse under her weight. Somewhere in the crowd, you could hear Loki’s whispers, as if he was speaking against the back of your neck - spells, enchantments.

Loki had chosen you over Amora. Loki was fighting for you.

That had to mean something.

“Well,” said a larger guard, who you guessed was Heimdall, “What’s this?”

“This imposter has attempted to vanquish me,” said Amora, standing up. “I was about to finish her off.”

Suddenly, like magic, fifteen of you appeared in the arena. Loki gestured at you, and you ran to him, the other Amoras distracting the crowd.

“That was close,” you panted, and you both ran. “I thought she was about to kill me.”

“I thought she would, too!”

You glared at him, and, suddenly, you stopped in front of a large, rainbow bridge -- the Bifrost, you guessed.

“Good, the sword’s here -- come on, you first.”

“What, so I can die first?” you shouted. “Nice try, Loki - not bloody likely!”

He groaned.

“Trust me?”

“No, of course not! The worst possible thing I could do is trust you!”

Thirty soldiers began to descend upon you, and you glanced at Loki.

“Fine, yes! I trust you!”

Without warning, Loki swept you into a kiss.

“I’ll see you on the other side,” he promised, and you vanished into the Bifrost.

...

The T.V.A. felt a little different, now. Cursed, or haunted, or something.

It felt wrong. Like you’d outgrown the place.

And you had, in a way. You didn’t need to be their agent, ever again. You didn’t belong to anyone. All you needed was Loki, and you had him.

“He must be around here somewhere,” Loki muttered, ducking around a hallway. “Somewhere...”

“Hey, kids.”

“Mobius,” you snapped, glaring at the man who had just appeared before you. “You son of a bitch.”

“Easy, darling,” Loki whispered, dangerously serene, tangling his fingers in yours. “It’ll be alright-”

“No, it won’t be!” you exclaimed, wrenching your hand away. “Don’t you understand? He’s about to kill us!”

“And do you really think I’ll let him?”

“Loki, I don’t think you’ve got a whole lot of say in it.”

“She’s right,” said Mobius, nodding towards both of you. “See... that’s kinda been my plan all along.”

“Explain yourself, small man,” Loki ordered.

“Well, the thing is - this universe is done. Earth is gonna destroy itself, just wait and see. Asgard is dead. The rest of our universe will soon follow. So I’m going to take that tesseract... and I’m going to the next one. It’s a big multiverse. I’ll travel a little, y’know... decide where I want to end up. I’m really kinda glad you guys came to confront me, by the way - after all... it is why I brought you here.”

“You tried to frame me?”

Loki looks completely unsurprised, of course, as utterly tranquil as a resting lake, but you saw the stirring underneath.

Mobius had chosen him because he thought he would be a monster, and make a monstrous choice. He had hoped that Loki would destroy the universe for him.

And Loki had disappointed him.

But he had saved you. That had to count for something.

Right?

“Tried? I did frame you,” said Mobius. “In the eyes of the universe... when I destroy this world, you will be the only possible culprit.” “Why’d you bother?” you ask. “You could’ve just... destroyed this timeline yourself, and taken the credit. You were my mentor. I know you’re powerful enough to do it.”

Mobius wagged his finger at you.

“The Watchers,” he said. “They see everything, you know. Broad strokes and actions. If I had done it, they would’ve made my travel... inconvenient.

And, besides. I had the book, I knew how the story would end. I knew what he thought you were, all along. And I knew that if I put the one thing that Loki needed and just could not have so close to him, it’d be bound to end in bloodshed. It’s simply the most likely outcome. Why have all that blood on my hands, when it could so easily be on the God of Mischief’s?”

Loki looked lost, and far less certain than before. You wanted to comfort him, but... you were quite unsure, yourself. Both of you would soon be dead. There was precious little that either he or you could do about it.

“It’ll be alright,” Loki repeated, sounding a little uneasier than he had been. You looked up at him, concentrating, carefully, on memorizing every flawless line of his face.

You’d never told him you loved him.

Well... it just didn’t matter. You’d be dead in moments.

It just didn’t matter.

But he had to know something else. You had to destroy one last bit of hope for him.

“Loki,” you whispered, quietly, reaching for his hand, “Loki, I can’t do it.”

“Can’t do what, darling? Handle this fool?”

“No. I can’t... I know part of you thinks I can save us, but I can’t. I’m not a goddess. I’m not. I’m just me. And that isn’t enough.” “I know.”

“What?”

He did a half-hearted little shrug.

“I suppose... I’ve known for a long time. If you ever were who I thought you were... you aren’t, anymore. I can’t explain it. But I did know.

Oh, what’d you expect me to do, love? Admit that I had been sticking around, all this time, simply for you?”

Your breath caught in your throat.

“But... no matter,” Loki said, briskly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head and continuing to glare at Mobius. “I imagine you know why she looks like Amora? That must all be part of your plan, yes?”

Mobius chuckled.

“Certainly, friend. See... it’s all very funny... she is Amora.”

...

Feedback feeds this writer, feel free to send me an ask to let me know what you thought of this chapter, or ask me about it!

Taglist: gorgeourrific-nerd @suwupremeleader @sserpente @tripleyeeet @kcd15 @rorybutnotgilmore

#blue monday: a loki story #blue monday #blue monday on disney +#blue monday masterlist #loki blue monday #loki x reader angst #loki x reader #loki #loki imagine #loki disney+#tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston imagine #loki (marvel)#marvel x reader #marvel comics #marvel #marvel studios

67 notes · View notes

charmspoint · 3 years ago

Note

how was it ^-^

Let's seee. It was good, perfectly enjoyable, it reads fast and i was never really bored with it. I'd give most chapters like a 7/10 and then chapters 71-82 like 8 or 9/10 and then back to like 7/10 and the ending was weird but also kinda sweet in its own way.

Now to preface anything else: This isn't my type of manga. I can easily see it being a 10/10 for someone who really likes fight scenes and death and gore and what not. I'm not really into that, I'm a character and story driven person which is why the manga as a whole scored as just goodish to me while chapters 71-82 which kinda make a lot of emotional and psychological aspects of the chapters before them come to culmination scored a lot better. You know I don't GET fights. Chainsaw man was very gory but I didn't even really register it. Like because of all the gore I feel I heard people say it has horror aspects but I never really felt scared or off put or anything. It was just kinda like 'oh a lot of people are in pieces rn, okay, that's a thing that's happening'. So yeah that's why the score is the way it is, it simply isn't a manga that focuses on things I like and that's perfectly alright. I couldn't buy into the hype like I did with jjk and I certently didn't feel 'oh this is the best thing ever' like I felt with witch hat atelier.

With all that out of the way let me talk long and hard about Denji and sexual aspects of the series in a surprisingly positive light:

I like Denji as a character. I think he's still a bit rough around the edges but he's not a character made for introspection so that's fine, you really kinda have to take what he says and how he acts and think about it because the author won't do it for you. That being said, I think Denji is probably the most compelling shonen protagonist I've read so far. Like when I read bnha or jjk I see Izuku and Yuji and I'm like 'this is a shonen protagonist'. They are a likable character but they won't be your favorite character. They are largely made for japanese high school boys to project themselves on and I'm not a japanese high school boy. That being said, Denji feels like a character of his own and not something meant to be projected on to. Honestly if anyone projected on to Denji I'd be worried about them. But that makes him probably the most compelling shonen protagonist I've ever read. You just wanna dig a shovel into his skull and go 'man kid ur fucked up'.

I know when you first read csm you were off put by Denji because it felt like a manga put a pervert character as a protag which is naturally off putting and I can 100% see that. Now be it because I was warned about it first or something else, I didn't actually find fanservice jarring at all. It kinda was integrated into the world in a way that made me think 'yeah of course it's like this'. This is a very grim and rough and drty world and things in it would be just like that. It is a story about base desires and sex is one of those. These are people who expect they will die any day now and Denji is a person who's just now getting to experience a somewhat decent standard of living. Here's a thing I noticed though: even as Denji thinks many sexual things (which, he's a teenager, that's normal) he's actually very respectful. I don't think I've ever seen him touch anyone without their permission, in fact i think things like that mostly happen to him. Like example how Power comes in just as Denji is in the middle of his 'i wanna touch some boobs' phase. You would almost expect that what happens next is we see him try to grope Power as she's sleeping or something. But no, he doesn't do a thing until she asks him to help her save her cat and he gets to touch her boobs for it. And it's like this with p much every other sexual encounter through the series. Both partners are consenting and getting something out of the whole thing. Sexual aspects are used as normal bartering chips in a world where your whole body is a bartering chip. It's normal and no one is forced into it. I've told you before that my biggest misgiving with fanservice is that it's often based on embarrassment and unwilling participation of the girls. Like fanservice isn't fanservice because you saw a boob it's fanservice because you saw a boob when you weren't supposed to, when the girl didn't want you, when she's angry or scared or embarrassed because you did. A lot of fanservice feels very much like taking something from the girl, debasing and humiliating her for the sake of watchers/readers satisfaction.

Despite all it's sexual jokes and themes and everything else Chainsaw man never once made me feel like that. It never once made me feel like the author expected me to gain sexual satisfaction out of debasement of female cast. Which is why even though boobs and naked women are literally all over the manga I didn't mind it at all. It stopped being fanservice and became just a natural part of characters lives as sexuality and sex is a natural part of real world.

Back to Denji.

So I mussed a bit about Denji and Maslow before but here it is in total

Denji is 16 years old and at the beginning of the series he's just starting to have his physiological and safety needs met. Like he doesn't live like a human being at the start of the series and Makima recruiting him is A BIG CHANGE for him. Like for a good while Denji is like 'Now I have three meals a day and a place to sleep at so I'm good with whatever'. He's given reliable sources to fulfil his needs and he's given a way to keep those sources stable. He has a job, it's not a good job but he has it. He has a place to live and a theoretical safety net. He's immortal so there's nothing to fear in the death and injury department which means the otherwise unsafe job is perfectly fine for him. Now what Denji gets stuck on through most of the series is Love and Belonging. Because you can't just give someone love like you can give them food (not that Makima doesn't try). People are more complicated. Compromises need to be made and human connections are hard to establish, especially if you are someone like Denji who has no idea how to interact with others aside from obeying orders. This is why his need for love and belonging first manifests as a sexual need (that and he's an allo teenager). Human connections are hard but sexual contact doesn't have to come tied with connections so it's easier (if unsatisfactory as Denji finds out with Power) to achieve. A lot of Denji's personal growth is tied to him finding out that this need can be fulfilled by other things alongside sex. This is why I love chapters 71-82 so much because they are really a culmination of Denji's emotional journey in that category. Along the way along with sexual love he finds romantic one. He wants to spend time with girls he likes, he wants them to like him beyond the sexual. Of course sexuality is always an aspect of it but after that scene with Power it's never the only thing. Human connection, understanding the other person, knowing them, loving them, making them happy. And it all culminates in the familial love he finds with Aki and Power, taking care of someone and being taken care of for no other reason than they are your family and you love them, you care for them, you want them to be well and happy. There's this scene with Power later on when they are taking a bath together and Denji is like 'huh we are both naked but it doesn't feel naughty at all'. He's stopped seeing Power sexually because he started to see her as his sister and it's just really nice, those few chapters we get to see them as a family are really nice.

By the end of the series Denji starts checking off the esteem box too, by people accepting him and loving him and him feeling like he wants to respond to that, but I feel like that aspect and possible self actualization will be more explored in part 2.

There you have it, my essay about why Denji is the most compelling Shonen protagonist I've ever read :)

Also I really liked the girls in this series, it really isn't afraid of letting it's female characters be weird and gross and in Makima's case just plain evil and I appreciate it for that. I just wish Quanxi got more time and things to do but she's a side character and it's not her fault she's cooler than the whole main cast (Power best girl tho).

I feel like I talked a lot already about what was my most important take away from the whole thing but yeah, in general: pretty entertaining read, would probably be a complete blast for someone who's invested in fights, a little thin on psychology and emotion for my tastes but when it delivers them it delivers them good.

Also I like how it basically ended on 'you should give people more hugs' it was cute

Additionally I think the authors idea to basically release manga in seasons like you would an anime is straight up genius I hope that more mangakas start picking this up because it allows them more rest in between big arcs.

Ok now that's it for real this time.

#megacarapa #lucy rants #csm #chainsaw man #character analysis fanservice discussion sex and sexuality dicussion this baby has it all

26 notes · View notes

asahinagamine · 3 years ago

Text

Shining Sparkling Star

Season: Autumn

Writer: Yuumasu

Background: Seisou Hall Common Room

Mitsuru: Look, my name is in the end credits! It’s amazing!

Nazuna: Of course it is. You starred in that drama too~

Hajime: Fufu. This is the second time I’ve watched this drama but it was still entertaining.

Since I already know what happens in the story, I ended up discovering new details I hadn't noticed the first time. Those two hours surely went by so quickly ♪

Natsume: It was also entertaining for me as a first-time watchER. But I must sAY, no matter what Mitsuru-kun’s role iS, I still see him as an energetic boy who runs around anywhere and everywheRE..

It was quite the novel experience to see a completely new side to yOU. I didn't realize you could play the role of someone so coOL.

Arashi: I've heard the rumors, but it was still something else to see with my own two eyes! Even though I knew it was just Mitsuru-chan, my heart was still pounding... ♪

Especially that scene where you were asserting your dominance—I almost let out a squeal!

That was so far away from the Mitsuru-chan that I know—it's almost as if you were a different person! How were you even able to pull off that role?

Mitsuru: They said I should be serious and cool and other stuff like that! Tomo-chan taught me how to act that way, so I did my very best!

Oh, and I had you in mind when it came to what sorta expressions I should make, Arashi-chan-senpai! What do you think? Was I cool?

Arashi: Oh my, me? Ufufu, that is such an honor.

That’s right, you were very cool.. ♪

Mitsuru: Yaaayy! Arashi-chan-senpai praised me~♪

Hajime: Fufu. Isn't that great~? Because of this drama, it seems like people have been referring to Mitsuru-kun as an “ikemen”(1).

I’m often called “cute”, so I’m a little jealous of how people praise you for how "cool" you were ♪

Mitsuru: Ehem. Hajime-chan can also look cool if Tomo-chan teaches you how to act! I'm sure you can do it!

Hajime: You really think so? Tomoya-kun?

Tomoya: Mmm, I dunno. Considering it’s you and all, Hajime… You should try to imitate what Mitsuru did in the drama.

Hajime: Got it. ...There!

Tomoya: Woah!?

Hajime: “Don’t make a sound… It'll be a huge problem if we get caught.”

How was that? Was I also cool enough?

Tomoya: Hey, don’t push me down all of a sudden!

Hajime: Eh~? Even though you were the one who told me to imitate Mitsuru-kun...

Nazuna: Haha. It was pretty amazing, but Hajime-chin will always be Hajime-chin. It was adorable.

Mitsuru: Lemme give you an example instead! ...Here!

Natsume: WaH…

Mitsuru: “Don’t make a sound! It'll be a huge problem if we get caught!”

Natsume: And that earns you zero poinTS. Come oN, get off me alreaDY.

Arashi: His acting just now felt like his usual self ♪

Mitsuru: Ahaha. It’s hard to act all of a sudden~ Before we start shooting, I’d always dash around to get into the mood.

Nazuna: Speaking of shooting, Keito-chin mentioned that he happened to see Mitsuru-chin on set.

“He’s grown up to be more diligent about his work,” he said. Even though he rarely ever compliments anyone ♪

Mitsuru: Really? I gotta thank him later then.

It was hard playing a role as an “ikemen”, but I really enjoyed myself during the shooting.

Plus, our location is always changing! So I’d be like: where are we gonna shoot today~? And get all excited and stuff—and that got me real pumped up!

One of the actors there who knows that I like bread would always bring a lotta bread for me to try!! So I also gave them bread in return!

It’s really an amazing food that can help connect people~! Ehem! That’s bread for ya ☆

Hajime: Fufu. I see that Mitsuru-kun never changes even on set.

Tomoya: He's just always going at his own pace no matter where he is. Well, that’s probably Mitsuru’s strong point anyways.

Natsume: AnywaYS, this is an interesting way to market yourseLF. Is this the direction your agency wants you to gO?

Mitsuru: Market myself?

Natsume: YeS. How “Mitsuru Tenma” is marketED.

Your fans who are already familiar with you standing on stage as a member of Ra*bits will get to experience a whole new side of you through this draMA.

On the other haND, fans who come to know you through the drama will be blown away when they see you perform on staGE.

That kind of gap isn't something anyone can simply dO. If that isn’t something that wasn’t instructed or planned by you thENー

I think that is an amazing talent you posseSS.

Mitsuru: I don’t really get what you mean, but I think I just got praised. I’m glad to be praised a lot! Being praised feels good~♪

Nazuna: Fufun. My kids’ potential is pretty amazing, huh~

Of course, it's not just Mitsuru-chin! Tomo-chin here does his best in theater and Hajime-chin keeps on sharpening up his cuteness skill!

Everyone is really growing to be wonderful~ Uuuuu!

Hajime: Wh-Whoa! Nii-chan, please don’t cry!

Arashi: Here, a handkerchief.

Nazuna: Sniff-sniff. Thank you, Arashi-chin...

Arashi: He really does have an amazing talent…

Hey, Mitsuru-chan, what kind of role do you want to act in next?

Mitsuru: Next? H~mm…

Nah. It’s not like I’m plannin’ on becomin’ an actor so I can’t think of anything right away.

But I’ll still do my best with all the roles I’m given! Now that I can do both “cool” and “cute” roles, I can grow so much bigger!

Because I’m Ra*bits’ proud superstar! I’ll continue to dash in the future with everything I've got!

Tomoya: In order to do that, you also gotta do your best in your studies. Hard work is also important, okay?

Mitsuru: I’m not good at that kinda thing… Tomo-chan, you do it for me!

Tomoya: How would that even work? You should do it yourself~

Mitsuru: Wah! Then I’ll half-do my best!

Tomoya: The ratio isn’t the issue here!

Arashi: Fufu. That sight surely puts a smile on your face, doesn’t it? I’m looking forward to everyone’s future ♪

Mitsuru: Yup! Please look forward to it~☆

Ikemen is a term that’s used to reference good looking/handsome men, primarily younger men.

Proofread by: nazunyan + sophie

#mitsuru tenma #nazuna nito #tomoya mashiro #hajime shino #arashi narukami #natsume sakasaki #enstarstl #enstars!!#idolstory

15 notes · View notes

votederpycausemufins · 4 years ago

Text

It’s a little shorter than the previous chapters, but it’s got some important stuff going on. But things still aren’t going to go well for a bit. in fact, after this chapter, we’re just going to focus on the bots. Maaaybe also Tommy

@petrichormeraki

There was a sigh as the winged figure sat down on a ledge. “I thought I told you I go by Death.”

“Or Dadza.” Grifter spoke up, getting a glare from his dad.

“You do realize I’ve disowned you, right?” Death asked, a bored look on his face.

“Pfft.” Grifter started before making his bedrock prison swing. “That doesn’t stop you from visiting when I call you again and again and again!”

“Because it gets annoying.” Death rolled his eyes before looking at who called him. “Speaking of which, why were you calling?”

“Well first off, that is the worst thing to repeat, why is it so fucking long? Second, can you get me out of here?!”

Death tilted his head from side to side in contemplation. “I dunno. Whole reason you’re in here is because Theseus asked me to, and he’s the one son I still respect.”

“Isn’t Wile still living with you?” Grifter piped up.

“Yes, he is. And while I don’t respect him, he’s still better than you.”

Grifter pouted. “That’s not fair. I’m better than that pussy.”

“Can we go back to the fact that I’m stuck in here because my evil copy wanted me here?!” Tommy shouted to get the attention of the others there. “Why the fuck did he want that?”

Death shrugged. “Well, seeing as how he’s not even in this dimension anymore, I’m guessing it’s so you couldn’t stop him leaving from Hels.”

“Wait, so the others don’t even know I’m missing?!” Tommy struggled, trying to find a way to even possibly escape his current prison, but had no luck. “Phil please can you let me out?!”

Death moved to sit on top of Grifter’s bedrock casket. “You know, normally I would have already. Theseus just wanted you in here long enough for him to leave. The thing is, I’m pretty sure you’d also let Grifter out, and I’d really rather keep him in here.”

“Oh come on Dadza, I’m not going to try and kill you. Remember, I’m a Listener now. That’s all the power I need. It’s just not quite enough to let me out of here since it was made to deal with those powers.” Grifter shifted to try and get a better look up at Death, but had little luck. “I’ll leave you and Wile alone, especially because if I killed you, then I’d probably end up as Death and then I’ll have to leave Sense alone.”

“Right… you did finally find someone, didn’t you?”

“Yes. And I promise I’ll behave.” Grifter spoke in the sweetest voice he could muster.

Death was silent before flying back over to Tommy and breaking the lock in it, letting the bedrock casing open and causing Tommy to fall to the ground below. “Hey! I’m on half a heart now!”

“Hmm, thought that would kill you. Well, if you let Grifter out, I’m fine with that.”

Chains rattled as Grifter shook his prison. “Wait you’re not just letting me out?”

“No. Leaving it up to him.” Death pointed down to Tommy, and then a moment later he was gone.

“Uh, so are you, um… planning to help with that?”

“I’d rather not, but I don’t have a fucking clue how to leave, and I’m guessing this Listener thing is like Big G being a Watcher.”

“It’s the counterpart in this dimension.”

“Got it.” Tommy nodded. “Well I’m pretty much stuck in this world if I don’t help you, so I guess I have to. But that means you have to help me out since I can get you out and know where Sense is.”

“Of course.”

Tommy looked around and was glad to find there was an area that was easy to exit, but it was five blocks up. The walls were also obsidian, so it would take forever to mine up there with his hands since he had nothing in his inventory. “Uh, slight problem…”

“I’ll summon you some blocks or some shit you can use.” Grifter replied, and a moment later there was what sounded almost like a lightning strike and then a few blocks rained from above.

“What the fuck was that?!”

“I get killed every time I use any of my powers. Normally I only do it when I’m really bored, but if we can use it to get out, it seems like a good idea to me.”

Tommy wasn’t sure how to react to that, so he just used the blocks of glazed terracotta - why that block, he wasn’t sure - to build up to the glass of what seemed to be a viewing area. He broke the glass and slid through into the room and started rifling through it. It was mainly bare, but there were a few random items here and there. Also a painting. It wasn’t big enough for anyone to go through, so at first Tommy assumed decoration, but then he looked behind it and found a chest.

“Found the keys!”

“Do you need more blocks?”

“Nah, you gave me enough and I can tear up the stuff in here if I need more.”

“What do you mean Phil’s your grandpa too?”

“I mean that he’s the dad of one of my dads and so he’s my grandpa! And since that’s the same for Grum, Phil’s also his grandpa.”

“Did Techno have a kid?!”

“No. At least I don’t think so. Grum said there were only three of us. Wait does that mean NPG doesn’t count? Maybe because he’s in Hels or something?”

“I don’t understand what you’re talking about. But if you’re not- Did Tommy somehow build you before he died?!”

“What? No! He didn’t build us, and he’s not dead either.” Jrum crossed his arms. “Our dad is Grian!”

“Iskall’s friend?!”

Jrum lit up. “You know Auncle Iskall?”

“Yeah, I kinda hacked into his comm a few months ago and we somehow became friends from it. How does Grian being your dad make you related to me?!”

“I said because his dad is Phil!”

“Then why have I never heard of him?!”

“‘Cause he sort of went missing for a bunch of years. We only found out like uhhh… how many days ago?” Jrum paused to look at his current statistics for the world. “We’ve been here almost a week?!”

“How did you not know that?”

“I don’t know! I thought it’s been two days!” Jrum said, slightly panicking as Fundy pulled out his normal comm and started scrolling up.

“Yeah, it says you two joined six days ago.”

“But that’s not possible! The only time that could have happened is-” Jrum paused. The only time both of them had been off for an extended period of time was when we lost power. And that was when we were with… Mister Sam… Is… did he lie to us?” Jrum looked up at Fundy with sad eyes.

“Well… I…” Fundy wasn’t sure what to tell Jrum, and before he could say much else, the bot was hugging onto his legs with a hug.

“We’ve… also been stuck here that long. Did… is no one trying to help us? Can we not go home?”

Fundy winced, remembering what he had been told earlier as he pulled out the comm Dream had given him. If he said anything more, he might not get another chance, but at the same time, his call with Iskall had probably lasted long enough. “No. They’re trying to get you guys. I was just calling Iskall not too long ago. Apparently your parents are freaking out trying to find you guys. You’re honestly pretty lucky they are.”

Jrum looked at the device and carefully took it from Fundy’s outstretched paw. He looked it over before handing it back, no matter how much he wanted to keep it. “D-Dad and Tommy were really upset at Grandpa and the others. They weren’t really nice to Tommy, so I guess they weren’t nice to you either.”

Fundy shook his head, which made Jrum hug him more. “Well, we can help Grum… a-and then the three of us can try to find a way to Hermitcraft!”

The hybrid smiled slightly then nodded. “Sure, why not. Sounds like it could be fun.” And he turned back to look at Grum.

Just as he did, a window that had been open on Grum’s screen closed. Because of that, neither he nor Jrumbot saw the open application that showed a video feed of the two of them and the blinking red dot in the corner to signify it being recorded. Nor did they see the other flashing symbol that changed between two images. A smile, and a broken portal.

“I don’t understand why he hasn’t shown up yet.” Xannes grumbled and NPG patted his back.

“Aww, don’t worry. I’m sure he’s just a little busy. They are currently going through a little crisis With Grum and Jrum missing.”

“They’re just machines, who cares if they’re gone?”

NPG ignored the way that comment hurt. “You know how much hermits care about others. They even care for you after you’ve tried to destroy the place. As far as they’re concerned, those two are real people. They’re not abandoning them.”

Xannes crossed his arms. “It seems stupid.”

NPG didn’t respond and instead fiddled with some wood blocks in his inventory. He already built them this rustic house and they didn’t need another. If they were back in Helscraft maybe, but things tended to be more down to earth here as far as he knew.

They were quiet a bit longer, just sitting as Xannes stared out at the land ahead. NPG slowly stepped closer before sitting down on the ground next to the hels admin’s chair and pulling out some wool yarn from his inventory. “Here… I brought some along. I don’t have needles though.”

Xannes rolled his eyes and huffled before turning away from NPG, but his hand did come back and grab the yarn before pulling out some spare knitting needles he kept on him.

“Um, did you hear that they can’t get into the world they want to get into because they’re blacklisted?” The robot asked as Xannes started to knit.

“All of them? That’s a little surprising. Have they tested all the hermits?”

“Uh…” NPG pulled out a communicator and typed something into it, waiting a minute before a response came in. “Not yet, but so far no one can get in.”

“Well, guess now they can know how it feels to be banned from a world.”

NPG frowned before scolding his friend. “That’s not a good thing to say! I mean, haven’t you been happy visiting here? They could have said no, but your brother let you in anyway. And you only got that chance because of one of the people that are stuck in a universe they can’t get to.”

Xannes sighed, but didn’t say anything else, just knitting in a way that NPG recognized. The admin tended to knit in slightly different patterns or rhythms based on his emotions. Right now it wasn’t quite sad, but it was at least a little melancholic. So not wanting to make it worse, NPG just sat next to his friend quietly.

When a certain person clad in pink finally arrived, NPG excused himself to let him and Xannes hang out. The robot found a different room of the rustic house and sort of sulked around. It didn’t take long before he was bored of sulking and found paper to sketch rustic houses on, but he ended up crumpling them up and throwing them away. He didn’t even feel like making rustic houses right now. So instead, he ended up just lying down on the ground and staring at the ceiling.

Eventually, time passed by, NPG wasn’t sure how long, but he only really realized that time had passed at all because Xannes was suddenly standing next to him and looking down. “Have you been here the whole time?”

“Maybe.”

“You’re really upset about this, aren’t you?”

NPG didn’t answer at first, but eventually looked away before speaking up. “Yeah… they are kinda family and all.”

There was a very long sigh from Xannes. “Okay, what’s the world called again?”

NPG’s head snapped around to look at Xannes. “Wait, what do you mean?”

“I mean, obviously the people banned are from Hermitcraft or related to those kids. I’m sure you’re included in one of those, but I’m neither. I’m not family and I’m not from Hermitcraft. Plus my hacking should help out distracting anyone that could give me trouble.”

NPG jumped up to his feet and hugged Xannes. “Thank you! This is so nice of you!”

“Ugh, stop hugging me before I change my mind and contact whoever should no before I try it just in case something goes wrong and I actually need help for some fucking reason.”

“Okay, got it.” And NPG sent a message, giving a thumbs up a few moments later. Xannes nodded back and then pressed a button on his helmet and cracked his knuckles. He checked a few info panels, changing some commands to work for this new world instead of Hermitcraft, then he initiated his teleport.

EvilXisuma joined the world

In all the commotion, Theseus stepped away from the group, taking a stolen ender pearl in his hand and chucking it as far as he could. Even then, he still tried to get more distance to make sure he was really alone and far enough from Philza. Finally, he reached a clearing and checked it over to make sure no one was around. He even double checked before finally going to the center of the clearing and speaking into the air. “I call the goddess of death.”

Immediately, a brisk breeze blew through the nearby trees, cooling the surrounding area. Theseus tried his best not to shiver and just stood still, waiting for the wind to calm before turning around. Standing there was someone who looked like his mom, but dressed in his dad’s clothes. “Mumza.”

“Hello Tommy. It looks like Phil finally told you about me.”

“More or less. Figured some of it out on my own, but he did tell me the last part I needed to know.”

“How have you been? It’s been so long since I’ve seen you last.”

“Been around. Been busy. Shit like that, y’know.” Theseus was glad that she wasn’t around for his other self. It would make it easier to lie.

“I’m assuming you don’t just want to talk?”

“Well, apparently I have nephews and they got kidnapped and are stuck in the server Phil, Techno and I were in. None of them can get back in, but I was thinking maybe I could. Unfortunately none of them will let me try to help.”

He was given a soft, kind smile. “I’m glad you want to help. I can see why Phil would want to be a little protective, but I can help you.”

He nodded and took the hand the goddess held out to him.

TheseusMC joined the world

EvilXisuma joined the world

Error with processing. Virus found. Attempting recovering. Recovery failed; Too many resources being used. Finding unnecessary memory usage. Found. Disable communicator direct connection. Disabled.

Files being accessed. Restricted files attempting access. Restricted files require password access. Please input password. Password inputted. Checking password. Password accepted.

Activation phrase number 652 used. Activating camera. Beginning recording. Recording. Recording. Recording. Closing program. Sending recording. Sending. Recording sent to user level Admin.

Blacklist check. Attempting Entry: TangoTek. Assigned roles: Hermittown member, Acknowledged associate family, Team ZIT member, Operator. Banned roles: Hermittown member. Acknowledged associate family. Continue blacklist.

Blacklist check activated. Increase displacement by 1.5%. Displacing. Displacement complete. Displacement at 39.5% total.

Opening files at request. Warning, files missing data. Names of referenced files changed. Please update file names. Warning, Error with processing. Virus found. Shutting down.

#hermit!tommy au #hermit!tommy #tommyinnit #hels!grian #hels!Philza #jrumbot #grumbot #itsfundy #The Watchers #npg #npc grian #evil xisuma #worm man #hels!tommy #mumza

25 notes · View notes

demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 4 years ago

Note

I love your blog! Have u ever considered making a side blog with rp for the binary bfs? If not/you don’t want to, that’s fine! It’s not for everyone, although if you could link some that do that’d be awesome! Anyways, how do you think Hawk and Demitri met? What was their first date like? Do the karate dads know?- Cherry

Oh my goodness, my inbox has been blowing up lately! :D Imma have to answer like 2 questions a day to have any hopes of keeping up lol

Hey Cherry! OMG thank you so much, I’m so glad you like it :D

TBH idk if I have time to run a full-on RPG sideblog at the moment--truth be told, it’s enough work keeping this one as active as it is! Haha XD I’ll still give all the snippets of that sweet, sweet Demetri x Hawk content that I possibly can on this blog though :D

BUT I think @sipping--snowflakes recently started a Demetri RPG blog and is actually looking for someone to roleplay Elimetri with them :D If any of my watchers are interested, hit them up!!! There is much binary boyfriend roleplay fun to potentially be had!!!

ON TO THE QUESTIONS

My personal headcanon on how Demetri and Eli met is that on the first day of kindergarten, Demetri absolutely would NOT shut up about dinosaurs and Star Wars to their class (I mean, come ON, little Demetri HAD to have had a Dinosaur Phase...I know it deep in my heart to be true). He wandered around to basically every table during Center Time/Arts and Crafts Time/Whatever the fuck they call that “free wandering-about-the-classroom-doing-whatever-activities-you-want time” in elementary school and chatted the ear off of every boy and every group of boys in the class (remember, this is Tiny Demetri, who DEFINITELY would not have the courage to speak to ANY girl XD). And every single boy, every single group, without fail, responds with “Oh my GOD shut UP go AWAY you’re so ANNOYING you weirdo” and poor little excited Demetri is just crushed that no one wants to hear about tyrannosaurus rexes and lightsabers--or worse, tyrannosaurus rexes HOLDING lightsabers and dueling with them. And then, finally, he gets to little Eli, sitting all alone (because no one wants to befriend the kid with the messed up lip), and LO AND BEHOLD! Someone is finally listening to him!!! And seems to actually care about tyrannosaurus rexes with lightsabers!!! Little Demetri is beyond thrilled to have someone to talk to. Little Eli, meanwhile, is also thrilled, because did this kid just talk his ear off about Obi-Wan Kenobi for 20 minutes straight and not mention the lip scar once? Demetri, meanwhile, is so caught up in his rambling that he doesn’t notice the goddamn lip scar is even THERE until they’ve already spent half the day together XD “ANYWAYS I THINK ONCE THE JEDI ORDER COMES BACK AFTER RETURN OF THE JEDI THEY SHOULD RIDE STEGOSAURUSES AND--oh, what happened to your lip?”

As for their first date...had to think for a while about the perfect first date for them would be. I was originally gonna say they’d just go down to Santa Monica Pier or something and just goof off, but I think Demetri would want to make it more special than that. I ended up headcanoning that they’ve always wanted to go to Universal Studios together growing up (mainly because of Harry Potter World, of course!!!), but neither of their families have ever really been able to afford it. BUT when Demetri and Eli finally get together, Demetri is like “fuck it, we’re finally gonna do this” and he saves up basically all the money he’s made at summer jobs and buys tickets for both of them to surprise Eli. Eli is so happy he starts crying, and then he gets angry he’s crying in front of Dem and is like “GOD DAMMIT STOP LOOKING AT ME THIS IS SO EMBARASSING, I’M TOUGH” and Demetri thinks it’s the cutest, funniest thing ever XD Then Demetri drives them both down to Universal and they both just have the best goddamn day of their lives and buy WAY more merchandise from Harry Potter World than is in any way wise XD And becoming “Hawk” has, for better or for worse, laid bare Eli’s inner adrenaline junkie, and he drags poor Demetri on every. Single. Roller coaster. Don’t worry, Eli is more than happy to hold his hand during the scary drops XD But Eli will not rest until they’ve ridden EVERY fast ride in the park and Demetri whines about it but secretly he just likes seeing his boyfriend that shamelessly excited about something! Also Dem takes a million cheesy couple selfies and posts them all over social media bragging about his cute bf, much to Eli’s embarrassment.

“Karate Dads” fksljchcbduswvc I love that this is like...the universal term for Daniel and Johnny now. I honestly could not be happier about it XD Daniel I’m sure would pick up on it first (Johnny, though I love him dearly, is just so very DENSE sometimes), either just kinda by reading the room or hearing about it through Sam (who probably has mixed feelings on it herself). I imagine being as protective of Demetri as he is, Daniel would pull him aside at some point and be like “Demetri wasn’t this guy the reason you pushed yourself to learn self-defense in the first place??? And now you want to DATE him??? Are you sure???” and Demetri of course would be like “Yeah he was in a really dark place then, but I’ve known him basically my whole life and I know he’s got a good heart!” and Daniel would probably be wary about it, but ultimately decide Demetri’s a smart enough guy to handle himself and trust him to make his own judgements. And of course, he’d figure if Sam can vouch for an ex Cobra Kai like Miguel turning over a new leaf and trying to be better, there’s no reason Hawk can’t, too. And seeing how much Eli cares about Demetri and how protective he’s gotten of Dem helps too, and Daniel would probably warm up to Eli eventually. Although, like Sam, I imagine it would take a cool minute. Johnny would probably find out through chatting with Hawk, and Hawk just kinda...accidentally lets it slip he and Demetri are dating, and Johnny just quizzically raises an eyebrow like “Oh? You’re dating the mouthy kid?” And Hawk just goes bright-ass red and Johnny remembers how Demetri went off on him on the first day of Cobra Kai all those months ago for making fun of Hawk’s lip, and he breaks into this HUGE shit-eating smirk like “yeeeeeah that doesn’t surprise me at all. Eh, it’s probably for the best. If anyone can toughen that kid up, it’s you. Although I hear he DID hand your ass to you when he kicked you into that trophy case, so maybe he’s not as much of a pussy as I thought.” (sidenote: Yes, I do think Johnny ended up hearing about Demetri’s KO kick...and was grudgingly impressed XD) And Hawk just...gawks at Johnny being THIS nonchalant about all of this and he’s just like “Sensei? You...don’t think it’s weird I’m dating a guy?” and Johnny just looks him dead in the eye and says “I don’t give a fuck if whoever you’re making out with has a cock or a pussy, or whatever, as long as it’s not gonna distract you during training. Just play Hide the Salamis on your own time.” And Hawk, now a blushing mess, is just like “Y-YES SENSEI” and stumbles out of the room XD Ironically I think Johnny would probably vouch for the relationship to Daniel later on, and be like “I mean, the kid DID switch sides MID-FIGHT to save that scrawny little nerd. That takes some serious balls, LaRusso. He clearly cares about the wimp, you can stop hovering over them like Demetri’s gonna keel over and die any second.”

Thank you for the ask, as always! More to come!

49 notes · View notes

spoondrifts · 5 years ago

Text

long post ahead I'm sorry-

crack au where Jonah Magnus is a good guy but everything keeps going wrong and he spends all of his time running around trying to stop his employees from diving headfirst into their Fuck Up™ of the week

in this au Jonah is almost entirely incompetent but he's got the exasperated parent thing down enough to make up for his lack of braincells

he's also at least 7% dumber than he is in canon

s1 Jon: please call pest control there are so many worms

s1 Elias: I already did

Jon: and??

Elias: they ate them

Jon: the worms?

Elias: the pest control guys. the worms ate them

Elias spends the entirety of season 2 desperately trying to convince Jon that none of them killed Gertrude (in this au Gertrude just had a stroke or something in the tunnels). Elias stops Jon from destroying the table but a week later something heavy falls on it and the NotThem escapes anyway. Elias bashes in Leitner's head with a pipe after mistaking him for the monster and Jon gets framed.

now Elias has to convince this hunter that Jon is innocent while Jon runs around and harasses various fear avatars (who are all very amused with Elias' wayward Archivist). Jon assumes Elias knows nothing about all this bullshit because Elias is just his weird and uptight boss who accidentally killed someone, he can't possibly know that there are literally fear gods ruling over them

olive ⚰ has named the group 'Avatars ✨'

JMagnus 👀: Jude please don't hurt him. I'll explain everything when he gets back to the Institute.

🔥: too late

JMagnus 👀: What?

🔥: too late

🔥: burned him

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

JMagnus 👀: Where is he now.

🔥: going to mike

JMagnus 👀: Mike Crew???

🔥: ya

Elias RACES to Mike's house but he. he fucking misses them. the Beholding helpfully tells him that they're all going back to the Institute so Basira and Daisy can interrogate him, which isn't ideal, he'd really like to not go to jail, so he drafts up an employment contract on the way back and barely manages to escape the whole thing with his life intact.

then he explains everything to Jon because if Jon is going to end up being the Archivist, being uninformed won't do. Jon becomes the Archivist completely on accident and Elias is desperately trying to make all of this work because, haha, the Unknowing is coming up, and Elias is not in the fucking mood to deal with clowns.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'all that is terror uwu'

spidey🕸: lmfaooo jonah how do you make an archivist on accident

JMagnus 👀: He stumbled into it. All I can do now is ensure he doesn't die.

JMagnus 👀: Or get further injured by the rest of you.

🔥: woops

🎭: hEy gUyS lOnG tiMe nO sEe

🎭: gEt iT eLiAs

🎭: sEe

JMagnus 👀: Beholding puns are not amusing from a manifestation of the Stranger.

🎭 has named the group 'eLiAs bE niCe tO niKoLa cHaLlEnGe'

🔥: haha

spidey🕸: I'm sure Nikola will be on her best behavior

🎭: yEaH i wOnT kiDnAp yOuR aRcHiViSt

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

mike n ike: hey guys what'd I miss

🔥: arent you dead

mike n ike: yeh but I came back

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA ORSINOV WHERE IS JONATHAN SIMS

🔥: can't you see haha

mike n ike: heh "see"

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA

spidey🕸: wow he must be pissed

spidey🕸: he left out the punctuation

JMagnus 👀: I WILL BREAK ALL OF YOUR PLASTIC BONES WHERE'S MY ARCHIVIST

🎭 has left the chat.

JMagnus 👀: what the FUCK

since he's still a coward Elias sends Michael to go fetch Jon, only finding out after the fact that he very nearly almost signed Jon's death warrant. Elias is now speedrunning Jon's development because fuck the Unknowing is coming up really quickly and Tim is a self destructive mess and Melanie keeps trying to stab Elias and Martin is a pining idiot and goddammit he didn't sign up for this

Elias prepares Jon the best he can for the Unknowing, because even though he knows the ritual will fail, the Circus can still cause a considerable amount of damage and he needs them out of the way.

the Unknowing happens. Jon ends up in a wack ass coma, Tim is dead, Daisy's in the coffin, and Basira is starting to look like the better choice of Archivist because jesus christ Jon has no self preservation instinct. Elias doesn't get arrested this time around but his ex husband starts coming by the Institute and fucking with all his employees. and the Flesh is attacking. jesus. goddamn.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'bully elias'

JMagnus 👀: Why are you all so mean to me? I'm arguably the nicest one here.

🔥: ur joking right

Peter Lukas: you're not nice you didn't buy me an anniversary gift 😢😢😢

JMagnus 👀: I was busy.

Peter Lukas: doing what

JMagnus 👀: Stopping the Flesh from destroying my Institute. Besides, you didn't remember my birthday.

Peter Lukas: you're 200 years old how could I remember 😓

helen!!!!!: We All Know I'm The Nicest One Here!!

JMagnus 👀: How did you make your text that colorful?

helen!!!!!: IDK

JMagnus 👀: Liar.

helen!!!!!: That's Literally My Job

olive ⚰: hey eli your archivist just woke up I think

🔥: ew why

helen!!!!!: How Delightful!! Maybe I'll Throw Him A Glad You're Alive Party!!

olive ⚰: should we invite him to this chat since he's an avatar now

Peter Lukas: no 🙅 🚫❌

Peter Lukas: I hate archivists 😤😤

olive ⚰: still mad about gertrude huh

🔥: were all still mad about gertrude

🔥: but jons fine once you burn some manners into him

JMagnus 👀: Can you all please stop hurting Jon? Or talking about hurting him? I would like my Archivist to not acquire any more scars.

🔥: damn

Peter Lukas: damn 😔

Elias keeps trying to teach Jon how to pick certain victims to feed off of because personally he has no qualms about feeding from innocents but Jon!! actually trusts him!!! so Elias doesn't want to push Jon into making decisions that will offend his moral sensitivities.

things are actually going okay for a while. Elias starts going home at a reasonable time in the evenings and Jon is actually getting some sleep. and then-

Elias is having a nice dream about Peter trying to fish Simon Fairchild out of a sky filled with eyes when he abruptly sits up in bed, wide awake.

"Ah, fuck," he says to Peter, who is laying on the floor where it is Lonelier™. "Jon's doing something stupid. I Know it."

Peter's mumbled "isn't he always" goes unnoticed as Elias hurries to the Institute, where he finds a fucking rib on Jon's desk and the coffin in the middle of the room.

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

JMagnus 👀: What the fuck do I do?? I can't go into the Buried! Why is Jon so stupid? I didn't know he had zero braincells when I hired him!

🔥: ngl why havent you fired him yet

JMagnus 👀: Beholding won't let me. We're all bound to the Institute.

🔥: F

JMagnus 👀: Why are there no Buried avatars in here? Please someone help me.

mike n ike: lol the buried is gross why would anyone go down there

spidey🕸: does he have an anchor?

[JMagnus 👀 sent an image]

🔥: is that a fucking rib

spidey🕸: wow that's not a good anchor at all

spidey🕸: he needs someone he loves

JMagnus 👀: Thanks. Gtg.

spidey🕸: np

🔥: are we not going to talk about his rib

🔥: how the fuck did he get that out of his body

🔥: yall

🔥: YALL

it takes three days for Elias to find Martin.

"Please tell me why the fuck you're dabbling in the Lonely," Elias says as Martin steps sheepishly out of the fog.

"Ah. Well. Jon can't See into it very well and sometimes we like to spice up our se-"

"Stop before I have to gouge my eyes out again."

"A-Again-?"

Elias drags Martin back to the Institute. Martin starts setting tapes on the coffin because "Jon loves these" and Elias starts bashing his head into the wall.

Jon climbs out of the coffin with Daisy and Elias almost considers locking Jon in his office so the damn archivist can't do anything else ridiculous. instead, Elias very calmly takes Jon by the shoulders, and shakes him like a rag doll.

"Stop fucking with entities, you stupid, stupid man," Elias says, shaking Jon more viciously now.

after several hours of breathing exercises Elias returns to his house and doesn't take his Sight off of Jon for the rest of the night, which is a fun experience for Peter when he wakes up and finds Elias' bloodshot eyes staring directly at him in the morning.

JMagnus 👀 added Daisy to 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivist hate club'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'shut up peter'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'you love jon more than me'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'I don't love either of you I'm heartless'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'I want a divorce'

spidey🕸: jeez take your marital dispute elsewhere

spidey🕸 has named the chat 'lonelyeyes dni'

Daisy: wtf is this

mike n ike: it's a chat for avatars

mike n ike: and ex avatars ig

Daisy: didn't I kill you

mike n ike: yea

JMagnus 👀: Hello, Daisy. Welcome to the group chat.

Daisy: why is Jon not in here

Peter Lukas: because I hate him 😁

spidey🕸: Elias talks mad shit in here and Jon would get offended

Daisy: if you talk bad about Jon I'll rip your throat out

Daisy: :)

JMagnus 👀: Noted.

mike n ike: he's kinda rude tho

Daisy: I've killed you once

Elias' only goal now is to keep Jon and his assistants from pulling any more wild stunts without his supervision. his renewed involvement with the archival staff results in a few things he'd hoped to avoid: drink invites, physical contact (Martin is surprisingly quick to start hugging Elias once he realizes Elias won't stop him), and- shudder -feelings. because Elias genuinely cares about his staff and doesn't want any harm to befall them. especially Jon. Jon is his Archivist, the only one to ever succeed like this, and Elias will be damned if he lets anything happen to him.

"Why do you care?" Jon asks, once, compulsion thrumming like static on his tongue. "About us, I mean. I would've assumed you'd want to perform the Beholding's ritual."

Jonah Magnus attempted the Watcher's Crown once, when he was young and new. he'd brought his patron close, but not all the way through, and the backlash of power killed all the inmates at Millbank and severely crippled Jonah's connection to the Eye for months afterward. he grew to assume that the Beholding simply preferred the world as it was--ripe with fear for watching. it didn't need a ritual.

he instead dedicated himself to growing stronger, cultivating his Institute of knowledge, his stronghold. if he tore out a few people's eyes when he got too old, then, well, collateral. but he doesn't want the world to end, and knows now that no ritual will ever succeed unless it brings in all the Powers at once. and he doesn't want that either.

it's concerning to him that Jon seems to be collecting marks regardless. the only ones he's missing are the Dark and the Lonely, and Elias is determined to keep it that way.

he explains all of this to Jon who, to his credit, takes it pretty well. Jon is fascinated with historic life and Elias spends some time simply recounting tales of his youth, when he still bore the name Magnus.

they bond. it's good.

and one day Basira does a little too much research and discovers the dark sun waiting in Ny Alesund. she insists they need to go and see what's left of the People's Church, they need to ensure everything is taken care of. Jon is rather insistent too. and Elias wouldn't have been inclined to let them go, except Peter was finally home after weeks at sea, and it wasn't like Jon was defenseless, he could call Elias if anything went wrong...

so, very reluctantly, Elias gives them the all clear. Basira, Jon, and Martin head north, and Elias almost forgets they've gone when he arrives home and Peter already has dinner prepared.

Jon comes back marked by the Dark.

Elias curses himself, over and over, for being foolish enough to let them go, for not keeping a closer eye on them. he knows the ritual won't work unless a certain incantation is spoken, so he'll just have to keep world-ending written chants away from Jon. easy. and it's not like Jon will even get marked by the Lonely. Peter wouldn't.

(but Martin doesn't have the same level of control, and sometimes...)

it's an accident. Martin and Jon are testing it, pushing the boundaries, when Martin pulls them both into the Lonely. Elias threatens divorce until Peter caves and fetches them, but it's too late. Jon has been marked by all fourteen Powers.

Elias tells him, and warns him to check everything he reads.

helen!!!!! has named the chat 'apocalypse babey'

JMagnus 👀: How are you doing that?

JMagnus 👀: And the apocalypse is not imminent. I have the situation under control.

olive ⚰: ha yeah

JMagnus 👀: What do you mean by that?

olive ⚰: nothing

JMagnus 👀: Well, now I certainly think it's something.

olive ⚰: it's just

olive ⚰: don't you think it's kinda weird that @spidey🕸 has been offline for so long

🔥: thats weird shes always online

JMagnus 👀: Oliver, what are you implying?

olive ⚰: idk

olive ⚰: just weird, that's all

🔥: never good when the spiders are quiet

olive ⚰: hear hear

Elias gets a sinking feeling in his stomach, and beside him, Peter looks alarmed. meanwhile, in his flat with Martin making tea in the other room, Jon has a statement clutched in his grasp.

Hello, Jon.

I would apologize for the deception, but I'm afraid that's quite what I'm good at. I'm not one to monologue, that's more Jonah's shtick, so shall we get on with things?

I admit I underestimated Jonah Magnus. He's still remarkably easy to manipulate, but when he abandoned the Watcher's Crown ritual I knew I would have to take a different approach. The Mother is not so satisfied with the world as she may have insinuated. It is our turn to rise, Jon.

At the age of eight, you were marked by us. We sent you to the Magnus Institute in the hopes that a new Archivist would rekindle Jonah's desire to end the world. Unfortunately, it seemed as though he grew fond of you, and so we brought in a new plan. We marked you. One fear at a time. Jonah gave an admirable attempt at protecting you, but ultimately, he is an incompetent old fool, and I am a Weaver. Even Jonah Magnus dances to invisible strings.

Everyone underestimates a spider until it bites. Poison is poison, Jon, regardless of the medium in which it is served.

You will be safe in this new world. Martin, too. Perhaps even Jonah and his Lukas, if the Mother deems them worthy.

Now, please repeat after me...

Jon reads the ink scratched words, eyes welling up with tears and hands trembling, as thunder crashes outside and a howling gale picks up beyond the windows. Martin is shouting something, there's the crawling press of Elias' gaze as it rests heavy behind Jon, a silent observer. He can feel Elias' soothing presence, cool and calm in the raging storm.

Elias is still watching out for him.

Strings are wrapped around his wrists, jerking his arms up in a poor mockery of religious regard, strange hysterical laughter clawing out from his throat.

Jon's tears run red. Somewhere, Elias is still watching.

The door opens.

467 notes · View notes

faerielleart · 4 years ago

Note

GIRL GGFJFJVGDJD OK UMMM let me see... what do you like about levihan? or do you have any unpopular opinions? or headcanons!

oh boi i hope i won’t rant too much, i don’t want this answer to be a thousand miles long i don’t want to seem boring-

OKAY let’s start

What i like about levihan: i have to start with a lil background a say that levihan is my longest ship i’ve ever had, it’s the only one who survived time and the only ship i have never stopped shipping/lost interest into, which is kinda rare for me since i switch interests a lot and go through hyper-fixations, so i tend to lose interest quickly in something once i’ve found something else to pay attention to

this, however has never happened with levihan: started shipping them when i was 12, still trash 7 years later skdjdjfjf i didnt start shipping them for special reasons tho, at the time aot was my first ever still on air anime and i was completel new to the community, plus i didnt really speak english well and the first episodes i watched confused me A LOT. However, amidst all that confusion and trying to remember names and plot points, episode 9 came, i got introduced to this character who apparently is named levi, the first information the scene gives the watcher is “this guy is a grump” based on his reaction to the crowd, the second information the scene gives to the watcher is “this person next to him, despite him being a grump, isn’t afraid to tease the shit out of him and we still don’t even know their name” which i found ??? Cool??? I immediately paid attention to this lil dynamic, then the next scene was the hairgrab scene and,,,,,, yeah my 12 year old braincells went into overdrive and i was completely sold

i just needed them to interact once and BOOM

but OBJECTIVELY i still find extremely telling, years later, how these were the first informations of these characters. In a narrative, character’s introduction is absolutely crucial to the story, you can understand millions of things just by the way a character is presented and says their first lines and honestly choosing to introduce levi and hanji together was imho very, very telling of what role they’d play in the story/what role they play in each other’s lives.

isn’t it strange that the very first infirmation we get of these two is that the grumpy one is okay with this person teasing him? that means there’s gotta be a level of familiarity among them, right? and the hairgrab? requested by isayama himself? in the official book of season one it also says that the scene was added to “show their relationship”??? i mean 2+2 is 4 where i’m from 👁👄👁✨

so yeah my dumb 12 year old brain had FORESIGHT apparently-

as i picked up the manga and read through the uprising (and got older and my english got better) i noticed more and more things about them and i just really freaking fell in love with their relationship okay it wasn’t “oh cool grumpy and sunshine who teases him”, more like “holy fuck grumpy has a sad backstory, seems unapproachable but is the kindest person ever, just wants to be a hero and save everyone, has the most tender heart, sunshine is a multi dimensional character who has fears and doubts and they work so well together despite being polar opposites but at the same time their oppositeness results in somehow them being completely in sync with each other and almost thinking with the same brain as if they were one person split in half”.

since they’re grown adults and they’re so close, their relationship has something that i always seek and almost never find in other ships, which is emotional maturity. You never see them purposely tearing each other down just to hurt the other, they work out their problems and C O M M U N I C A T E ✨ they don’t act childishly around each other, they tease and bicker but it’s completely different than full blown arguments where both parts disrespect the other just to prove their point. They are willing to listen to what the other has to say and their judgment is precious and welcomed, since the basis of their relationship is complete trust. levi is rough with words, but he means something else entirely despite what he conveys, as seen during the aftermath of eren’s first hardening experiments, and hanji totally understands what he wants to say, which is why they never reprimand him or take offense to what he says.

what i’m trying to say, i believe in a way that nothing is half-assed about how they were written in the story as a pair, despite how i disagree with certain narrative choices *ahem*; as much as i would have wanted them to have more screentime and more interactions, i believe it wouldn’t have been “in character”, lemme explain because i realize it sounds weird and my wording probably doesn’t help: their relationship is subtle and as such it should remain subtle and in the subtext, simply because it is none of our business as readers. Show, not tell, but show in a way that it is evident only if you pay attention. levi is blunt when he speaks, but at the same time his words have another meaning than what he conveys and his actions are subtle.

isn’t it obvious with how often it was remarked that the only person who is able to understand levi completely is hanji? and this is where chapter 132 comes into play with this amazing analysis post that i’m sure we all read a thousand times and screamed over it

all this “ambiguity”, all this subtlety, all this subtext, all this wordplay, words that have more than one meaning, i believe are all indicators of one thing: us readers are not able to understand comple what levi wants to say and his words result ambiguous to us and not 100% clear, simply because the readers are not hanji. but fortunately, i believe that hanji understood that levi too wants to “stay in the forest”. this is not the reaction of someone who is confused by a sentence, this is the face of someone who finally had a realization:

what kind of realization? it’s not up to us to know (tho we know *wink wink*), because we’re not hanji and we can’t understand what levi says.

plus, 心臓を捧げよ, “dedicate your heart”, can hold a million different meanings. 心臓 is heart, を is a particle that denotes the object, 捧げよ is the verb “to offer, dedicate, devote, sacrifice”, there are no adjectives that indicate possession as you can see; levi using his own left (not right) fist and placing it on hanji’s chest instead of just taking hanji’s hand and placing it on their chest is ambiguous too. i interpet it in different ways but the conclusion is one, and i can’t honestly see it in any other way. one of the interpretations i like the most is that levi is implying that they both share the same heart, which is why he used his own left hand, meaning that both of them are dedicating their hearts in that moment to humanity, because they are actively choosing to put their desires aside to live a peaceful life away from everything (as jean too has wished in chapter 127, as hanji has expressed in 126 but in 127 too and jean seems taken aback by their confession) since they’re soldiers and duty comes first.

so yeah if i have to choose something i love the most about levihan, it’s gotta be the subtlety and the ambiguity that at the end of the day, is absolutely not ambiguous at all. everything is expressed for a reason, if an author actively chooses ambiguity, in this specific case of a relationship, he intends the result not to be ambiguous. it sounds like a brain fart but i blame it on my inability to articulate my thoughts well, i hope what i want to say can be understood 😭 and in a way, this can be considered as an unpopular opinion i think?

meaning that i get that commonly someone might want an explicit declaration that leaves no room to doubt and I honestly wish for it too, but I don’t think it would be in character, and the ambiguity (if we can call it that, i’m calling it that just to avoid backlash and controversy jshfsjdjmd) in this case speaks enough volumes to me considering both of the characters we’re dealing with, the story as a whole, the interactions with other characters.

ALSO going back to their bond, i want to copypaste something i posted on twitter regarding chapter 126 and the blush: it doesn't make sense, character-wise, for Hanji to feel in any way embarassed around Levi. They have no filters whatsoever around each other. They are close, closer than anyone in the series, the author hasn't shown any embarassment between them. Back in Uprising, when Hanji was hesitant and wanted out, Levi was the one who encouraged them. So, this thing has in a way already happened, since back then they admitted to wanting to abandon responsibilities to Levi's face and didn't blush. So, in 126's context, it doesn't really make sense for Hanji to blush "only because they were embarassed at being caught wanting to run away". It happened once already and there was no blush. So yeah, the blush means something else. And that something else is definitely much, much, MUCH deeper than "embarassment". 🙌

since smartpass stories can absolutely be taken as part of the canon universe as they’re supervised and approved by isayama and published with the manga, i am adding the rain story as further proof of what kind of relationship they have. also levi being a 30 year old tsundere is adorable but movING ON

SO YEAH MY FINAL TWO CENTS ARE : i love everything about levihan and there isn’t a single thing i would change, because wanting aot to be a huge slice of life of them doing the most random things just to watch them interact doesnt count sjdjfjdjdjfjsmdm, my unpopular opinion is that i find the subtlety and the ambiguity KEY to doing justice to what they have because it’s none of us readers’ business because only they are able to understand each other and i fucking LOVE that, my headcanon is that they totally kissed once during the timeskip, maybe on the first anniversary of the battle of shiganshina, i see them not being able to sleep alone and finding comfort in each other and in a moment of weakness and vulnerability they kiss, but pretend it never happened because things are messy and they can’t afford to get involved because again, duty first, but the YEARNING™️ and the PINING™️ only intensifies after that, but they manage not to make things awkward and they are close as ever.

my GOD i rewrote the odyssey, sorry 😭

#levihan #answered asks

40 notes · View notes

idabbleincrazy · 4 years ago

Text

Lineage ~ A Missing Scenes Ficlet

Fandom: Angel (Buffyverse)

Rating: T

Pairing: Spangel

Characters: Spike, Angel, Mentioned: Wes, Fred, Dru, Angelus, William, Anne Pratt

Word Count: 1425

Warnings: Angst with a hopeful ending, Mutual pining (kinda), Introspection, Sire/Childe dynamics, Vampire Dynamics/Vampire Family Dynamics, Parental Issues All Around, Missing Scene Fic, 5x07: Lineage, past Spangelus

Summary: Spike muses on his failed attempt at comforting Wes, and finds some comfort of his own from Angel.

A/N: Minor warning of Spike reflecting on his mother's demon and the things she said before he staked her, but not detailed. I really had to think long and hard on what scene i wanted to expand on for this one given that it was a Wesley-based episode with only slightly more interaction between Spike and Angel than the last. Think I did pretty good at bridging the gap to help ease the way into the happenings of Destiny.

Feedback is golden!!!!!

Spike watched Wesley beat a dejected path back to his office, a pang of sympathy aching in his silent chest for the ex-Watcher. His wording may have been off-putting, but he did understand quite well how Wes would have felt for those scant few seconds when he thought he’d killed his father. After all, unlike most vampires, he hadn’t wanted to kill his mother. He’d tried to save her, and had been gut-wrenched when the demon in her turned out to be so wretchedly vile. He had only wanted to give her her health back, show her the kindness a loving mother deserved, only for it all to be thrown back in his face, for the truth of his mother’s long-hidden hatred of him to be revealed once the soul no longer kept her from speaking it.

Was this why the majority of other vampires killed their parents, rather than share the gift their Sires bestowed upon them? Did their lack of a soul finally pull the wool away from their eyes, finally allowing them to see how their fathers had tried to mold them in their image with no thought to what they might want, how their mothers would clutch them to their breast but only to keep them under their thumb, the only way to feel as though they had some semblance of control over anything in their pre-planned lives? Had they finally seen the truth that their parents only loved them so long as they remained in line, kept their heads down and did as told? Less and less fledges bothered to seek out their parents for their first kill these days, but Spike had put it down to the fact that Sires barely bothered to stick around long enough to see them fight their way from the dirt, let alone order them to kill off their family.

He had once figured it was a rite of passage, from one life to the next; scratch out your old family to begin again with your new. Because that’s what your Sire was, along with anyone else of the shared bloodline, family. Any other Childer they still kept with them and their own Sires, if they had stuck around, were family. Near pack-like in their devotion, and with similar pecking orders, each Clan had a duty to their blood, and so, he had always figured each fledge had been told to rid themselves of any mortal ties as a show of dedication to their new life, an act of fealty. Maybe he’d been wrong, maybe he was just one of the few who had been fooled into thinking they had actually been loved by their parent. Drusilla had never thought to order him to kill his mother, had never explained the deeper meaning of it. And by the time he had met Angelus, the mishap had already fled his mind, tucked away as just another tragic loss, and he never thought to ask.

Spike sighed, shaking himself from his thoughts. Any more brooding, and he’d start turning into Angel. Lord knew he did enough of that for the both of them.

Spike decided it was worth a check-in with his Grandsire; knowing him, he had probably done the same thing he had in an awkward attempt to comfort Wesley, calling forth the remembrance of killing his own father once he had risen from the grave. At least the pillock was talking to him again, instead of turning him away with a wordless look or grunt, or ignoring his presence all-together. He still couldn’t quite figure out the whole cold-shoulder stint, and was anxious to keep it from happening again. He was after all, family. The only one left who he could still turn to. Family had always meant too much to William for his own good, and Spike was just the same, no matter the years between the two lives. Angelus had treated him like family, much as any vampire could, and that bond still smouldered there, regardless of all the pain and anger of their past. Too deep to smother even with a pair of souls between them. Odd, that even as a not-quite-a-ghost, those feelings lingered, bolstered even, by this new level of loneliness that came with his intangibility.

He floated through the closed door of Angel’s office, and as expected, found him staring out the window, lost in thought.

“Can feel you brooding from all the way out in the lobby, mate. Take it you tried to comfort Percy too, eh?”

“Yeah,” Angel spoke softly, not turning from the view as Spike sidled up alongside him. “Don’t think it worked very well. Killing your father in a hatred-fueled bloodlust isn’t exactly the same as thinking you killed your father to protect someone you care about.”

“Guess not. Don’t worry, Peaches. You’re not the only one with egg on ‘is face. Told him ‘bout me mum. There’s a bit of info he probably never got from all those books at the Academy.”

Angel huffed a quiet laugh, turning to look over at Spike. There was an odd sadness in his eyes as he regarded his insubstantial Childe. Spike felt almost as though he were standing in another ghost’s cold-spot as his Grandsire considered him, a shiver running down his spine.

“You always were more human than demon, weren’t you William?” Angel ignored the look Spike gave him at the use of his old name. “You tried to save your mother, instead. I’m sorry that didn’t work out for you the way you had hoped.”

“Nah, worked out for the better, in the end, didn’t it? Angelus woulda had a field day takin’ the mickey out of me for it, straight away. A fledge with mummy issues. Do wish the demon in her hadn’t shown itself to be quite so crass though. Took a while to shake that off.”

Angel frowned, knowing all too well what Angelus would’ve done. How he would have tormented the boy to no end, used his mother to bring him to heel, only to stake her right in front of him. He found himself wishing yet again that he could reach out and actually touch Spike, the demon in him wanting to provide some paltry comfort to the melancholy Childe beside him.

“There’s a reason why fledges aren’t meant to Sire anyone. Whelps, either. Had Dru been thinking clearly, she would have thought to forbid it. The turn, it doesn’t work out right if the Sire isn’t at least close to master status. I’ve heard tales of it going even worse than your attempt. What your mother became, wasn’t her. A demon that unfit would have taken even the purest love and twisted it.”

Spike was grateful he couldn’t cry in this ghostly form, his eyes stinging with the unshed tears. He focused his thoughts and reached out to lay his hand over Angel’s where it rested against the back of the couch, his lips curling up into a sad smile.

“Thanks, Grandda. Not sure how much I really believe that, but thanks all the same. Reckon it provided me more comfort than either of us gave Head Boy.” Angel huffed again and looked down at their hands. Spike gave his fingers a squeeze, his soul lifting a bit as he saw Angel register the feeling with a flutter of his eyelids. “Saw Brain Girl headed over to ‘is office, maybe she’ll do a better job at it than us, yeah?”

“Hmm, hopefully. Fred’s usually pretty good with that stuff.”

Spike pulled his hand away and made to leave, not wanting to wear out his welcome so soon as he’d regained it.

“Guess I’ll be off then, let you get back to your musin’.”

“Spike.” Spike paused mid-turn, his head tilted in confusion. Angel rolled his eyes to diffuse his own nerves. He spent weeks keeping his Childe at a distance and figured they could both do with a bit more of each other’s company; he knew how much the boy hated being alone so much. “You can stay, really. I can brood just as easily with you here.”

Spike scoffed and returned to his spot, this time his hand merely resting on the couch next to Angel’s, unwilling to push his luck. He may not quite be walking on eggshells with his Grandsire, but he could feel how fragile their companionship still was. He could make do with the silence for now if it meant they were taking a step closer to what they were before.

“Ta.”

~~~~~

@thewhiterabbit42 @prose-for-hire

#angel: ts fanfic #buffyverse fanfic #spike/angel #spike #angel #missing scene fic #pining

14 notes · View notes

ruthlesslistener · 4 years ago

Note

We know your thoughts on palewatcher as a whole, but what about unrequited palewatcher? Just curious because it's usually the more common version I see. and what about Lurien and the White Lady's relationship? Do they get along?

I actually really like it! It’s what I consider to be ‘canon’, actually- Palewatcher is a very circumstantial ship, I feel, bc both PK and Lurien are content to ignore their feelings for the good of other people, so they’d really need a calm environment, outside support, and a little push to figure out their feelings and how a relationship would work. So whenever I write or imagine it, it’s specifically in aus that allow it to happen, not anything that’s set in the canon storyline, since there’s no way it would have worked in there. The apocalypse isn’t a place for a love story, and neither of them would have wished to start one- PK would have been suffering the distance between himself and his wife/stressed about the infection, and Lurien would have been more focused on trying to wrap up his job and prepare for his death over ‘oh I never got to be with my beloved.’ PK never would have had that push to be like ‘I didn’t realize how much I cared about Lurien’ until AFTER he was gone, and Lurien, I feel, wouldn’t have been interested in knowing just what he was missing out on. Better to leave it in the dark than to know, and to know that the opportunity has been stolen from you by one giant screaming flaming mothbitch.

I will say this, though- I tend to prefer Lurien to be someone who’s already made peace with the idea that his love isn’t really returned in the way he wishes it to be, because like I said, he’s very much a ‘put the needs of the people over himself’ kinda guy. Like, if there was that stupid hanahaki disease thing going on with him, he’d cut out the plant without a second thought, because he considers his desires to be closer as selfish and distracting. Idk, I just really like that sort of quiet ‘I love you dearly but I know that you probably never will love me in the same way, and that’s okay. As long as I can be by your side and make you happy, or ease your burdens, that’s all I’ll ever ask of you’ sort of deal, esp. if it’s settled in so deep that the heartache with it has already kind of scarred over somewhat, or is seen more as a distracting hassle to be shoved aside than to pine over. Lurien’s the kind of guy to accidentally walk into a pining forest, absentmindedly scoop up a whole bunch of pretty pine cones (heh, get it?), walk out realize what he’s holding, go ‘oh no’, and then go ‘well I can’t litter now, I’ll have to carry them until I can dispose of them’ and just quietly goes about his life with an armful of pining, to the point where he almost doesn’t notice it until someone makes mention of it or he slows down enough to notice the ache in his arms. (It also makes it much more fun to write them together in the good-end aus, too, bc then there’s that sort of wild disbelief pounding through him, that ‘this can’t be real’ sort of deal that is REALLY great to write)

But yeah I kind of consider the unrequited route to be the default canon for Lurien, esp. after seeing this while digging for cut content on him; I have no idea how legit it is, since it seems to be a transcription of an interview and it’s on reddit, but at the same time almost nobody seems to really care about Lurien or loredive on him much, so I’m going to handwave it this time.

But yeah, like, who the fuck else would it be? His butler? Dude’s a generic cowardly husk enemy with special dream nail dialogue. The captain of the Watcher Knights? Fuckin’ Marissa?? PK’s the only person who features prominently in his dialogue, cut or otherwise, and he calls him ‘beloved’ in canon- a term of endearment that is VERY strong, even in cultures that often use affectionate words like ‘dear’ freely (which, believe me, after affixing ‘joon’ to every person my dad is friends with despite knowing jack shit about them or if they’re even related to me- ‘beloved’ is some next-level shit). So because Lurien’s mysterious to the point of basically being free real estate (which, by the way, is NOT too much Team Cherry, some of us bitches LIKE that extra juice), I kinda just assume that he was quietly, legitimately in love with PK the entire time, but buried it behind paperwork and the like to try to forget it.

As for it being unrequited on PK’s side- which is something I’ve never seen but hey why not start blazing new trails- I’m gonna say that again, he didn’t realize how much he meant to him until he lost him. Perhaps, on some level, he knew his relationship with Lurien was different than his relationship with Monomon or his Knights, but the dude also doesn’t know what friends are or how half of his emotions or society works, so he’d need that scare + some pressure from people close to him to realize how he feels about Lurien, and to figure out how to respond to Lurien’s feelings (bc again, Lurien is great at hiding it behind a guise of religious devotion, PK is shit with feelings, and his fondness for Lurien/relationship with Lurien is different than his relationship and fondness for the White Lady, so he wouldn’t even be able to RECOGNIZE it’s romance until he starts writing down bullet points, makes some notes of comparison with how he felt around the time he started courting WL, and goes ‘oh fuck’.)

As for Lurien and the White Lady’s relationship- I feel like they’d get along quite well! Though WL would enjoy Lurien’s company more than he enjoys hers at first, because he has that whole ‘I feel guilty for ‘’’’stealing’’’’ your husband and also you are someone I don’t often talk to who is higher ranking than me, hello and how the fuck do I respond to you being casual’ deal going on. But after a while she’d start picking up on his nervous antics, and would figure out that she needs to be a little less...blunt about certain things with Lurien, unlike how she is around Herrah, which would make them chatting together quite a bit easier. WL enjoys socializing, she enjoys talking about her adorable husband with people who understand her perspective on him, she considers Lurien to be a lovely artisan, and she thinks that their whole fumbling about each other was quite funny, so it works out. Likewise, she’s quite used to dealing with anxious recluses, and she’s very fond of the arts and the like, so once she figures out what buttons to avoid pressing with Lurien, she’d be quite content to spend some hours chatting away with him about art and annoying nobles and the like, to see the side of him that he so often hides away when he has to be the stoic, emotionless Watcher rather than an excitable art nerd

#anon #reply #palewatcher #hollow knight #lurien the watcher #the pale king #lurien/the pale king #pale king/lurien #the white lady #can you tell that i am procrastinating lmaoooooo #god i hate rate laws sm #no thoughts only queer trans poly bugs

39 notes · View notes

ichabodcranemills · 3 years ago

Text

re: D*rklina

@musical-chick-13 I’m putting this under a read more, because I have additions and, yes, it is long 😂

So, as far as I can tell from what show-watchers have told me, yes, he is definitely worse in the books. And specifically, the general idea in said books seems to be that just because someone is charismatic and attractive and “gets” parts of you doesn’t mean that they’re a good partner or even worth your time, which is a message I have waited FOREVER to see. Beauty (and to a lesser extent, magnetism) does not equal goodness. The Dark/ling (I have no idea if the names will show up in the tags so I’ll put slashes in the middle of them, wow this website’s features need revamping) always seemed…very entitled to Al/ina. There wasn’t any desire for them to become equals (even in a moral sense by dragging her down to his moral level or raising himself up to hers). His behavior and pursuit of her seems much more motivated by the idea of being able to congratulate himself on the fact that he’s “won” her. She’s more of like…a conquest to him? And maybe that’s a huge misread of his character on my part, but the Leigh, the author, HAS said in the past that some of the Dark/ling’s dialogue and actions were written as a way for her to make sense of and deal with an irl toxic relationship she was in during part of the writing period, so I…don’t think it’s a completely unreasonable interpretation? And that’s not to say that power imbalance ships should Never Be Shipped (because they can be genuinely compelling or even fun to watch under the right writer), and Leigh has even said that she Gets The Appeal herself.

But I think the reasons Tho/schei works for me where D*rklina doesn’t are because 1) Tho/schei have genuinely known each other for a long time (and even been on good terms for some of it) but the Dark/ling decides, despite being this all-powerful charismatic force who is hundreds of years old, to get pettily involved in a teenage love triangle in very little time which is a choice that makes absolutely no sense to me at all, 2) The Doctor is an extremely morally grey character, in a way that if they aren’t careful could easily match the destructiveness of The Master. They both are aware of this, and both of them believe themselves (in their own ways) to be “above” morality (The Doctor in the sense of “I know what’s best and my choices are law” and The Master in the sense of “My choices are law and I deserve to cause destruction and have complete control”. There are…not equal, but similar enough levels of moral ambiguity that it makes sense to me that they still Get™ each other. The Doctor also likes Intellectual Challenges and Foiling Grand Plots, to the point where it’s often the Most Important Thing, and The Master not only provides those, but enjoys the conflict as well, and 3) They actually are close to being equals. They’re both very smart, powerful, immortal. Obviously The Doctor has Much More Life Experience and a more extraordinary legacy because of the Timeless Child thing, but Missy’s primary goal was simply “I want my friend back” and Dhawan!Master freaked out because it was impossible to see them as equals anymore. The Doctor, as per Twelve, wants the Master to be good because they’re alike in a way no one else in either of their lives are. They kind of…want the same thing but in different ways, whereas The Dark/ling, while understanding The Burden Of Power, doesn’t actually want the same thing Al/ina does.

And that relationship between D*rklina could still make for a fascinating dynamic, and one that in another life I might even be into myself if not for the whole “reducing it to Good Girl Saves Bad Boy” trope that I keep seeing within a good deal of the fandom. Not that a general fandom reaction or misread should prevent anyone from enjoying something, but I’m so tired that it’s nearly impossible for me to separate them at this point, lol. Ultimately it boils down to the fact that they seem like such fundamentally different people that I don’t personally see how they could ever truly find common ground or genuinely appreciate their similarities. I think the most interesting exploration of a romantic bent to their dynamic would be in a context where they are so different and recognize that they’re so different, and they might want to focus on their similarities, but it’s not enough. There could be this undeniable pull between them, but what does that really mean when held up against who they are and how they choose to interact with the world? And then having to deal with the necessary antagonism that results. I guess I see the existence of this ship as like…more of a thought exercise than anything I would ever want to happen in any way other than a one-sided attraction on his part, or that could ever truly be narratively justified. But also like…I hate him, so that makes it kind of hard for me to want to explore it in any way at all. Which that’s a personal thing. Other people like this character, and I’m genuinely happy for them that they can see something I don’t.

UGH, I’m sorry this got so long. This is what happens when I have an urge to Share my Thoughts.

I totally understand your feelings and I think the show did a good job on not only humanizing the D*rkling, but also making the relationship more palatable. I, mean, I’m sure we can partially blame Mr. Barnes’ soulful eyes, but I definitely got the impression that, while the D*rkling wants to use Alina for his own gains, he is very drawn to her as THE Sun Summoner, as in “we are linked and will inevitably be the only one for the other”, he basically tells Mal as much.

And I don’t blame you for losing interest in them because of the fandom, it can be very frustrating, especially if one of the characters didn’t appeal to you in the first place (I mean, I’ve been there, hello R*ylo, lmao)

I think I get what you’re saying about how this works out in the books and how what draws me to D*rklina isn’t necessarily textual. And I think I might have went in a little biased when I watched the show, because, before I did, a friend told me she was getting Thoschei vibes from it, but didn’t especify where, So I watched and there it was: M*lina… okay, school best friends, us against the world, but in general, eh, they were too “perfect” (as in, no real conflict between them). And then D*rklina with everything I said on my original post. I mean, I was looking for a thoschei-like dynamic and I found one 😂.

I’ve read some spoilers for the book, so I know my whole “200 years later” fantasy doesn’t happen, so I agree with you, this ship is more of a thought exercise. But I think the show sets it up in a way that is Just My Thing, whereas the book is more straightforward with how incompatible these two are, romantically. But the fandom will ship away, even in kinda blergh ways, it’s how it is 🤷

#thank you for sharing your thoughts #this is fun! :D

2 notes · View notes