#but it's too late

[pentapoda]

Ah, a character with floaty hair and a fun color scheme? I'm in.

[gascreates]

a new star

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

potato is love, potato is life- local hell woman gives potato to her angelic future wife

Charlie: “I don’t think I should be allowed to interact with women ever again.”

Husk: “Is this about Vaggie giggling over a fucking potato earlier-”

Charlie: “OH IT’S ABOUT THE POTATO ALL RIGHT! WHY THE FUCK DOES THE PHRASE ‘apple of my eye’ EVEN EXIST IN THE SAME UNIVERSE WHERE ‘earth apple’ IS ANOTHER WORD FOR POTATO??? WHY DO PEOPLE CALL THE STUPID SPROUTY THINGS ON POTATOES ‘eyes’????? CREATION IS STUPID! IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE!!”

Husk: “Did you fucking give her the potato.”

Charlie: (slumping) “I was trying to be romantic-!”

Husk: “Did you call HER your potato.”

Charlie: “THE POTATO OF MY HEART! The tuber of my root sprout!”

Husk: “Oh fuck. Shit, that’s. That’s terrible. You really shouldn’t fucking talk to women anymore.”

Charlie: (sobbing) “I WAS TRYING!!! TO BE SWEET!!!!!”

Angel Dust: “-hey gays m’kay, real fucked up question for ya both but- anyone know why Vag G-string is makin’ soppy doe eyes at an uncooked tater tot?”

Husk: “It’s because she’s almost as much of fucking fail loser as her girlfriend, is why.”

Charlie: (sniffs) “She. You think she likes it…?”

Angel Dust: “Charlie chip, she’s starin’ at the damn thing like it’s her first born child.”

Charlie: “Oh…”

Charlie: “…”

Charlie: “Unholy shit…. I am so GOOD with women-”

Husk: “No. No you’re fucking not. It’s just her.”

Charlie: “Well she’s the only one who counts so that’s perfect!”

Angel Dust: “Oh please don’ tell me you gave her the potato-”

Charlie: “BE RIGHT BACK IM GONNA GO GET HER ANOTHER ONE!!!”

Husk: “NO-!”

[mightierthanthecanon]

[existennialmemes]

you're underrated as fuxk

I honestly almost burst into tears when I read this. The Brain Gremlins have been feasting on my amygdala recently, and reading this just gave me a much bigger bat to fend them off

Thank you, anonymous friend, I appreciate you 💜💜

[reminiscingtonight]

Wait you like the Germans? I must apologize, I wasn’t familiar with your game 🤝

Okay be ready for the mental gymnastics.

I like some of the Lionesses, Georgia Stanway included. I continued to follow her when she went to Bayern, and from there my love of the Germans blossomed 🙂 Much to @wosobullshit's simultaneous horror and delight

[addison-was-here]

Something tells me there's gonna be a lot with them two...

[duchess-of-oldtown]

[innerchorus]

Not me convincing myself whilst doing the washing up that the fact that Hilmes is associated with the moon rather than the sun means not just that he isn't destined to become the king of Pars, but that Arakawa is setting up for him to rule Maryam instead (sure, there's only one sun in the sky and only one person can be Shah of Pars, but Maryam is a whole different country... the sun presides over the day, and the moon over the night... Arslan can have Pars, and Hilmes can find a way to be happy in Maryam)

Honestly the main thing is that he gets to be happy and if that means he ends up living quietly with Irina I am okay with that, but honestly this is my preference for him, and if he's planning on taking Maryam then he will need Zandeh with him for support etc, right?

[sandinthemachine]

https://twitter.com/umikochannart/status/1616544080518840320?t=hXisW2LC-YbYhsrToysJhA&s=19

i can't find a single gif that encapsulates the way i choked on nothing and screamed into my shirt

the veins the veins the veins i wanna frame that entire lower stomach and hang it on my wall like I'm a Catholic putting up pictures of the Pope

[webawee]

Today was the first time I read the words "Tongues battling for dominance" in a fanfic.

I'd only ever heard of it before.

I witnessed it today.

[belanova]

THANK YOU THES FOR TEACHING ME HOW TO DO VOTER FRAUD, WOULD'VE BEEN NICER TO KNOW A FEW HOURS AGO

[dickotomia]

Changed my mind I want to be perceived and loved

[with-vorpal-sword]

hey, how's work been lately? (with intentions to make your partner fall in love with me and my rustic country ways and inevitably leave you because of my natural love of christmas)

[eatifa]

just logging back in a second because i can't write something without turning it into a plot, this oneshot is becoming long 😭

my feelings at writing this oneshot

[dolcesuono]

she regretted it the moment she handed the small parcel to him. hetty, you absolute fool! this was not the sort of relationship they had - one that involved thoughtful gifts, earnestly exchanged before christmas. their relationship was the sort that involved urgent touches and heady kisses and leaving beds before the harsh light of daybreak. and yet, here she was. sitting before the fire in his bachelor's lodgings, wrapped in his dressing gown, passing him a gift so sentimental it was beyond excuse. beneath the brown paper wrapping was a small bound book - the libretto for cimarosa's il matrimonio segreto. it was, she remembered, the first performance of hers he'd attended, and pressed between its pages was a flower from the first bouquet he'd brought her. she felt sheepish giving it to him now, like a stupid, giddy schoolgirl. it was a silent admission that that night had mattered to her - that she assumed it mattered to him as well. but the package was in his hands now and she was pulling his robe more tightly about her, the only layer of protection she had left. " you mustn't get too excited, " she said, with what she hoped was a careless shrug. " i promise it isn't much - i only had the idea the other morning... "

@himbovillains --> 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙲𝙰𝙻𝙻