#but it was better than it is now
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i think what really bums me out about tumblr hitting the shitter, is that no other site offers the same kind of engagement. said that in another post, but lemme explain a little further. yes, theres other fandom sites. yes, technically speaking other sites have the same features tumblr does. but the way they encourage the use of these features are not for actual engagement. its for gathering a follower count, gathering silent likes. getting an audience so you can make a profit. but what if you dont care about follower count? dont care about being your own business? dont care about trending or how many likes you got? what i loved about the engagement from tumblr was that, it was encouraged to respond in *some way*. whether it be just a quiet tag of a keysmash, or just a "lol" or maybe even a full paragraph to add onto a post you liked and wanted to share. i posted my art, not to gather a huge audience and a follower count, but to make people laugh, or smile, or just relate a bit. i also posted art to express my own interests, especially since fallout and pirates are a hyperfixation of mine. (not using that as a buzzword, im autistic and struggle engaging with people outside of these interests.)
silent likes, silent retweets, a hot take here and there, hell even comment sections arent the same because theyre really only used now if something is controversial for an argument, dont give the same kind of engagement or feeling of community.
i want a space where i can be "weird".people talk to me about my interests with the same kind of excitement i have, where we info dump without fear of being yelled at because "i thought that was obvious?" and "lol everyone knows that shut up." but now, everything has become sterile. even if you are openly neurodivergent, you have to be the kind where youre ACCEPTABLE, and more importantly, profitable. you cant be weird about anything, because then youre mocked and ridiculed by the same people who say "youve got to be more autistic about things". everything is public on other sites, your likes are public, your blocklist is public, your bio has to include personal details otherwise people dont want to engage with you. you have to keep up with everything and make sure youre "acceptable" to be around. TLDR: i miss the days when i went to the internet to escape, where i could drop the mask and be myself. without feeling like im being watched, or judged for just enjoying something. I miss the days where you had your own quirky blog and found people who enjoyed the same niche series you liked, and they had the same enthusiasm as you did even for the details everyone already knows.
#personal posting#social media is going to shit#i mean it was never good#but it was better than it is now#not by much but at least i express myself without feeling annoying
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the curse of adhd:
i will remember with absolute clarity, when the thought strikes me that i have a text to send someone, that this is the fourth time in three days i've attempted to send this specific text
i will forget, in the time it takes me to pick up my phone, that i picked it up intending to send a text
#every time#managed to actually send it today!#but also i have been reminded to post this by the fact that i just had a task to do in two different rooms just now#so i turned the light on in the room i was getting to second because my brain would go 'oh why is the light on that's weird'#and check the room and it would remind me to do the second task#in the less than five seconds between turning the light on and exiting the room#my brain went 'oh the light's on better turn that off before i leave'#and i had to manually catch myself#PLS.#adhd
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"life doesnt get better, you just get stronger" does NOT include ages 11-17. life does in fact just get better from there. those years are dogshit. like, you do get stronger but its mostly just a factor of not being 11-17 anymore. positive thinking helps but it doesnt fix whatevers going on at 15, you have to brute force through that one raw
#i originally posted this as just a 'hey remember how fuckin bad middle/highschool was? shit was wild' type post but now#there are a bunch of teens in the notes being like 'oh my god are you serious? it gets better? im not stuck in hell forever??'#and im reminded that the only people who told teenage ella 'it gets better' were speakers at mental health assemblies#aka the least relatable people alive who were seemingly born to lie to you#so. uh. yeah im a certified adult who isnt here to lie or sugarcoat the realities of being a teenager#the only thing more certain than the pain is the transcience
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(shaking my 14-year-old self) I was so mean to you but I love you, I love you, love you
#on childhood#is there a worse fate than being 14?#you were so small and I was so mean but now I’m hugging you hugging you hugging you#the world was already too cruel to you I should have been better#mine
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its baffling seeing people on here being all shocked about how other ppl didnt have sex or do drugs or drink or go to parties etc etc in high schools like. sorry i was too busy getting bullied to do all of that stuff i guess. why are you surprised that there’s losers on the cringe loser website
#like yeah i WISHED i could do that sort of stuff#but i felt so completely isolated from everyone else at my school bc ppl were so nasty to me#its fine cos im doing all the stuff i missed out on now that im in university#but some ppl dont even get that chance#maybe its not that serious but. idk. just dont be a dick#but also ppl who didnt do that stuff acting like theyre better than ppl who did is fucking annoying and also a dick move. btw#📼
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BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1935) dir. James Whale
#bride of frankenstein#bride of frankenstein 1935#moviegifs#filmgifs#fyeahmovies#horroredit#filmedit#useranimusvox#usersugar#userbrittany#userrlaura#dailyhorrorgifs#userscary#userrobin#userdeforest#userfrodosam#classicfilmblr#classicfilmedit#oldhollywoodedit#dailyflicks#userbbelcher#chewieblog#useraurore#userlera#better special effects in the 1930s than now#mywork
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spins him around trying to understand the pink mop he calls hair
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#itadori yuuji#yuuji#jjk#fanart#jjk fanart#yuuji itadori#sukuna#if u squint lmao#he is THE boy of all time i love him so very much#in my desperate attempts to make his hair look consistent i appear to have made it . wavy..#its not my fault i couldnt help it i was desperate i needed something other than spIKES#so i made a main swoopy bit to centre myself#lisen ok liSTEN if it works it works and this is my ref sheet now @ future me ur welcome :3#this was helpful but at the same time it certainly reinforced my hatred for Short Hair Back View#improvement hell . but it will get better . (coping)#every1 pick a favourite i lov the middle one . best front facing bust ive done in a minute <3
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i think that gay sex cats is the new duchamp's fountain
#if youre getting mad at it now you would have been mad about modern art in the 1920s too#this is what people mean when they say that some people are no different than greek statue pfps getting all RETVRN abt art#also pack it up there's better posts on the automation of art and art philosophizing#too much people reblogged this for the quote unquote ethical painting. scram
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being vulnerable for a second to use my pooltoy furry oc to convey what recovering from contamination ocd has been like while undergoing hrt.
#being on hrt has been one of the best things to happen to my body#i feel more like myself than i ever had before#and there have been new challenges with my ocd since starting#but my worst day now is so much easier than my worst day before starting!#and my best days are miles better!!!#anyway stay hydrated everyone !#pooltoy furry#pooltoy#my art#ok to rb
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if we could stay connected, just like this
#ok last orbit niigo post im emubrained again and also i miss leoneed#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#mizuki5 spoilers#proseka#mizuki akiyama#mizu5#nightcord at 25:00#hurray !#meltdown released an amazing translation of the event so i read it and had my final cathartic transgender cry about it#and now i have ~4 assignments due on friday so i have to stop drawing mizuki. sad.#i recommend everyone watch meltdown's translation#please. its very good and better than the mtls floating around#i Get why people wanted to see it translated asap like i Get it i didnt understand half of the wordplay or kanji but like . wah#its so crazy how this event breached containment n how many people are rooting for mizuki even tho they dont play the game so i just#think its a shame that the translation everyones reading isnt really accurate/lacks the nuances.. Ok sorrynits a good event.#ive just been thinking abiut that for a few days and i love talking in tags. Adios#real Orbit heads will know this is an Heartorbit reference (that tarot card sketch i did almost 2 years ago and said i would finish)#(i havent finished shit)
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Bruce gets accosted by reporters and one of them asks "Is it true that you're in competition with Superman to win Batman's affections?" and he is so taken aback bc what the fuck are they even talking about? There are a million questions going through his head such as, since when was superman into batman? since when was this public knowledge? wtf did bruce say to imply that he was into batman as well? And he doesn't have an answer to any of these questions so he just smiles and says, "No, I'm not. The word competition implies that Superman has a chance, which he does not."
why did he say that? Bruce doesn't know, it just felt like that's how Bruce Wayne would've responded bc what's more Brucie than fighting with Superman for Batman's heart? anyway, upon reflection, this was maybe not the best response in terms of long term consequences, but he's committed to the bit now.
a week after all this goes down, news reporter Clark Kent is caught saying that Batman deserves better than Bruce Wayne, so is a third suitor putting his hat in the ring to win over batman?
#superman was already iffy on bruce wayne#now he has a true hatred for the man for#1) declaring his intentions toward someone he has feelings for#2) not only implying that he is better boyfriend material than /Superman/#but that he’s so much better that superman isn’t even competition#/bruce wayne/#notable playboy and idiot#a better choice as a boyfriend#the absolute arrogance#batman#bruce wayne#superman#clark kent#superbat#dc#dc comics#mine
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KEEP RESISTING!! KEEP FIGHTING!!! DON'T STOP UNTIL PALESTINE IS FREE! 📢📢📢📢
#Palestine#FREE PALESTINE#CEASEFIRE NOW#global strike#I know this is a really simple drawing... I wanted to make smth better... But...#/something/ is better than nothing at all
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As much as I love angst I think it would be funny if he just didnt give af
#Hazel you cant just ask people if they have a dead mom#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fop#fairly oddparents a new wish#headcanon#fop hazel#hazel wells#fop dev#dev dimmadome#I think he has mildly positive associations with it tbh#He asked where babies came from and his dad actually took him aside and explained how he was super special and important#and better than everyone else because he was a clone and talked him through the whole cloning process very excitedly#(Dev did not understand a word of it but it was probably the most positive interaction he'd ever had with his dad)#later Dev came back and asked where normal kids come from and he got uncomfy and made an Au-Pair explain#other than that Dev has basically no thoughts on being a clone its just a fact to him.#Actually thinking about it now that could be a really dark explanation for why his real name is Development#I mean you dont just get cloning right on the first try#and nobody wants to name and get attached something that might just fall over dead any minute#HAHA anway angst over teehee :3#fop nature au#<-for organization since this HC applies to it too
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Showing off the babies
(I watched Ultraman Rising! It was good!)
Bonus:
From this
#godzilla#ultraman#godzilla x kong: the new empire#ultraman rising#godzilla minus one#netflix#kenji sato#emi ultraman#kong#suko#the bebes!#now my collection is complete#Finally#I have them all#the dads/big bro collection#also I watched Ultraman Rising#it was better than I expected!#loved the family bond and the story#Emi is a baby#she's a good baby#now what if I put her with Minus One....#hhhhhmmmmm#haha joking!#....#unless?#do not repost#my art
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best friends
#valentines day#love puppy#love kitten#webkinz#digital art#id in alt text#my art#ik i said i would do raccoons again but i remembered ive been meaning to draw webkinz love puppy idk#this was mostly an excuse to experiment w brushes and textures. experiment failed i still hate them#my battle w procreate is ongoing 🔪#idk i feel like i should keep a tradition of valentines day drawings#HOPEFULLY now that school is done. maybe ill finally have the mental bandwidth to draw in october#which is way better than february 😑
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"don't make it political!" .... what proportion of death and suffering must occur before politics are involved. if this isn't political, what is even the point of any politics, ever. of democracy. the words are "by the people for the people." if i am going to be left alone by my elected representatives to "figure it out" - to undergo damage, hardship, fear. what the fuck did i elect them for. what was their job. the entire point is that they handle this shit. this is why we were supposed to be electing leaders.
poverty is political. misogyny is political. gun control is political. climate change is political. how much aid a community gets is political. what the fuck are you talking about. it's been political this whole fucking time.
#to be deleted probably#i think aid should be REQUIRED to be bipartisan#ppl shouldn't suffer bc of how they vote. sorry. i'm never gonna be like ''ah yah x area deserves it''#..... they're people. they're human people. what the fuck is wrong with you.#this is nonspecific bc it's the same argument every time it involves things the right wing could have prevented#oh she died in childbirth bc of abortion laws? well nows not the time to make it#well he died bc his boss made him work during the tornado? well let's not make this#ohhh they died in a school shooting? thoughts and prayers let's all not make#there's a big fucking natural disaster that is strong evidence for oncoming ecological collapse?#welllllllll leTS NOT MAKE IT FUCKING POLITICAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11#WHEN WAS THE TIME???????????#PREVENTION HAS ALWAYS BEEN BETTER THAN WOUND CARE.#> stabs u . oh sorry that wasn't political#but also good luck in the hospital good luck with insurance good luck with medicine#good luck with disability support good luck w/ur job and taking time off good lucK!!!#refusing to allow politics into the matter means they get to shrug their shoulders and absolutely#refuse any fucking ACCOUNTABILITY#THEN WHAT WAS THE JOB FOR??? WHY DID I GIVE THEM THIS JOB???#WHAT IS LITERALLY THE POINT OF ELECTED OFFICIALS
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