#but it uses a lot of the same dialogue
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the-magpie-collective · 1 month ago
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Wyll seems to be the only companion who intentionally and repeatedly uses the mindflayer tadpole to communicate. I did a quick search through the dialogue files and the only other instance I found was at the beginning of Act I, when Lae'zel is captured by the tieflings, she'll use the tadpole to demand you free her.
And yet, Wyll is one of the companions most against using the tadpole's powers. Arguably, I'd say he's more against it than anyone save for Lae'zel. Which is why I find it so interesting that out of all of companions, Wyll is the one to latch onto and make use of this facet of the tadpole's powers.
The first time Wyll can use the tadpole is when Mizora bids him to rescue Zariel's asset. If the Player succeeds on their perception check, they can bargain with Mizora to free Wyll from his pact. Wyll link his mind with the Player's Character in panic, demanding to know "What are you doing?"
Then again when Wyll is finally reunited with his father, he uses the tadpole to show his father why he pacted with Mizora. Instead of explaining in his own words, he shows him the cultists as they attempt to summon Tiamat into Baldur's Gate. He'll do the same for the Player Character if his father isn't saved, even when he is freed from his pact and could say it in his own words. If the PC refuses to let Wyll show them, he will explain it, but clearly prefers to use the tadpole.
Finally, Wyll will also use the tadpole to bid farewell if he has a falling out with the player character, telling the player "Godspeed, and may your journey be true."
For Wyll, who had spent the last seven years under a devil's thumb, this narrative choice to use the tadpoles to communicate is telling. One thing all of these scenes have in common is that they all emotionally charged moments. They are also moments in which, in my opinion, it is very important for Wyll to convey his sincerity. Wyll has spent the last seven years always dancing around the truth and now here comes along a power where not only can he tell the truth, he can show the truth as he sees it, so that there is much less risk of being misunderstood. A power like that has to be irresistible.
Just another thing I wish was explored more in depth in game.
Edit: Thank you to everyone who pointed out instances when other characters also use the tadpoles to communicate <3
Turns out Wyll/Lae'zel's writer is the only one who bothered to use proper tagging in the dialogue system ('MINDMELD' if you're curious). This is why I can never find what I'm looking for in the dialogue files smh
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imperial-nuisance-rudje · 1 year ago
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I think my most toxic trait as a Zenos enjoyer is wanting to 1v1 everyone who says that Zenos actively wants to kill his opponents
Like, completely disregarding that it is actively ignoring the text even in StB there (and that he consistently wants the WoL especially to live), he, uh, is written as having a desire for more the opposite to happen. Very, very consistently. His drive to live is solely linked to brief moments of pleasure-from-struggle and when that drops he explicitly wants to die so he can preserve the moment (and like. *looks at the end of 6.0* if he wanted to kill the WoL he would not be disappointed when they fall before the game allows it, nor would they have lived after given his will was strong enough to bring them back if they bite it). He wants struggle and lacks the ability to give enough of a shit to hold back if someone walks up and says they're going to go for his head.
Like, death is a side effect of what he's after, it's not the goal and he explicitly considers it a waste of life. Even fighting isn't the goal, the goal is to struggle, to need to put effort in. The WoL is just the only person to put him in that state as he currently is, hence his obsession.
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fictionadventurer · 4 months ago
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But does your man buy an entire hawking establishment just because he saw a painting of a hawking party where one of the women kind of resembled you?
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lightbulb-warning · 4 months ago
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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sailing-through-hawkins · 1 year ago
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wanting, chasing
✧ written for 'suck' ✧ word count: 480 ✧ rated: T ✧ cw: none ✧ tags: cowboy au (set in the same universe as previous cowboy entry), deputy eddie, flirty steve ✧ @steddiemicrofic o( >ω<)o✧
"Gettin' real sick of these games, Harrington." Eddie glares, arms crossed. His cheeks burn and his face is red, but it's purely because all the blood is rushing down to his head because, guess fucking what? He got caught by a damn trap and now he's hanging upside down from a tree like a damn dog's tongue hanging from it's maw.
"Really?" Steve laughs, leaning against the tree all casual-like, all confident, all cocky. "I don't think I can get enough."
"You say that now," Eddie squints as he rotates towards the sun, the sound of Steve's laughter so close behind him. "But wait 'til I get my hands on ya -"
"Oh but deputy -"
Eddie spins and faces the tree again but now Steve's there, his face right in front of Eddie's. His hand gently holds Eddie's upper arm, stopping him from twirling away from those hazel eyes, sharp and mischievous.
"I think we both know," Steve murmurs, his eyes glancing up at Eddie's mouth with a smirk. "I've got you in the palm of my hand already."
He should feel anger, indignation, some kinda threatened by that. But all Eddie can think about is how Steve's still wearing the bandana, the one he stole from him that night at the saloon, around his neck. How it looks like it belongs there on him, Eddie's signature black tucked into the collar of his tan shirt.
"Eyes up here, Munson."
His eyes do flick up and he stares at the golden glow of Steve's smile, soft and sweet. Without a single thought in his damn head, he uncrosses his arms and reaches out, fingers ghosting over his lips. Steve inhales and before Eddie can blink, he's somehow pulled Eddie's glove off with his own damn teeth and ah fuck.
"Yer a terrible man," Eddie grumbles half-heartedly, as Steve spits out his glove onto the ground.
With a chuckle, Steve presses a kiss to Eddie's fingers. "And you just can't get enough."
"Maybe I have," Eddie says weakly (they both know he'd never). "Maybe I've decided I've had enough, 'n it's time to start chasin' other -"
He hisses when teeth almost pierce his thumb, low-lidded eyes staring him down, warning his running tongue.
"You ain't chasin' nobody else, deputy," Steve gently sucks at the skin where he bit Eddie, something of an apology, but his eyes, dark in the shade of the tree, tell Eddie it's more of a promise. "'S you 'n me, end of the line."
"Ha," Eddie clears his throat. "Anyone would think you had somethin' to claim here."
"Somethin'," Steve pulls Eddie's hand out and just barely grazes the air Eddie breathes with his lips. "Someone."
And with that, Eddie's on the ground, a throbbing echoing in his skull, staring up at the man above him, who winks and runs out of his sight, out of his grasp.
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mariocki · 3 months ago
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The Brothers Rico (1957)
"Okay, okay, so nobody's blaming you! Let's just say something happened way back, huh? So maybe I am gonna die. But, Eddie, you've got even bigger troubles. You're gonna live."
#the brothers rico#1957#film noir#american cinema#phil karlson#lewis meltzer#ben perry#georges simenon#richard conte#dianne foster#kathryn grant#larry gates#james darren#argentina brunetti#lamont johnson#paul picerni#harry bellaver#paul dubov#william phipps#richard bakalyan#mimi aguglia#US noir adaptation of a Simenon novel; i haven't read this one i dont think but I'd bet good money the book doesn't feature the same#syrupy sweet (and frankly quite implausible) ending. that aside‚ this is very decent stuff indeed. it's character led‚ rather than being#too plot heavy‚ allowing Conte (an old favourite of mine since he stole The Four Just Men tv series away from his international co stars)#to shine in his role as a former mob accountant gone straight but dragged‚ by younger brothers‚ back into the grist of it all#he's brilliant‚ particularly in the early domestic scenes with Foster which are genuinely very sweet and charming‚ with a realism and#natural rhythm that this kind of film so often fails to find in contrast to the stylized violence and hyper cool dialogue of the more macho#setpieces (not that i don't enjoy those too!). nor is Conte alone; this is a good film for actors‚ and every part down to the most minor of#middlemen‚ henchmen and goons (and there's a lot of those here) feels like a fully realised‚ honest creation by a talented actor#the melodrama comes a little thick in the back half and as said the very ending is.. far fetched. but definitely a superior whole of a film
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meirimerens · 2 years ago
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thinking about how mishandled the herb brides are because like. The Text tells us they're not sexual beings (P1 mentions them being virgins, engaged to the Earth, and not to be touched even by their husbands, almost, for a lack of a better word and to conjure an image more than anything, priestess-types) and that their dances are nonsexual and sacred (all all true and correct) WHILE. giving them detailed / 3D modeled nipples. topless. clothes very conveniently torn [in ways that would be unrealistic for actual dancing like in the fucking moshpit]. all pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women. being already sexualized as white-passing asian women, but if they looked more like other NPC models/members of the Kin like the Kayura models (which to me would make more sense because they are never mentioned to be mixed in the way Artemy, an indigenous man who's blonde blue eyes due to being mixed, is [while still very much being indigenous and it being a central part of his story]), it would be even more obvious and would steer even more into Very Blatant fetishization of asian women. and then one asks, are they white-passing because they're sexualized? are they sexualized because they're white-passing? was it an admission of guilt to not make them look like Kayura model, because it would be too obvious then? or is it an admission of lust for women more white-passing? is it about beauty in the eye of the beholder?
then there's bewildering and dehumanizing lore of members of the Kin being non-humans, through the existence of the Worms (literally half-soil), them being a (more or less literal) hivemind, and that being "less human"/closer to the earth (nice_dichotomy_what_lies_outside_of_it png but also... the game touches on that...) immunizes them to the Earth's disease... and yet the Brides look like women... pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women who someone found wise to give 3d modeled nipples to, still good for the ritual cutting... do you hear how i'm going mad yet...
edit to add because while i was so mad and it WAS in my mind i just didn't have the strength to add it when i first wrote:
and they're bought and traded between the odonghs they pair with (again, closer to cattle or things) ... ladies there's so much. there's too much.
#werewolf tearing shirt off again#ah well. [lets myself drift away in the images i've made of the brides and my constant quest to humanize them and respect them and#make them diverse and full of life. which i might never manage to and yet i try.]#also i was thinking like. their celibacy + virginity + central spiritual place in the kin do be reminding me a lot of priestesses#[really sorry for boxing them in like that but if there is stuff of the same thing just with another name imagine i used it here#i just don't know any other]#and priestesshood famously was an option for women to avoid marriage; and often domestic/sexual servitude to their husbands#same for nuns who are also said to be like. ''engaged to christ'' in their own way (again only making tangentially similar patterns;#not calling the Brides nuns of course)#so having them be Said to be nonsexual [until they're said to be etc] while being Shown as sexualized it's like. oooh the misery#neigh (blabbers)#disclaimer i'm white & i'm sure Many indigenous women regardless of origins have touched on this in more direct and deeper ways i ever coul#oh there's also the fact that the kin is said in design document to mirror in ways 19th century native americans#and the herb brides going to sexualize themselves in the B.H. ''for outsiders'' (p1 dialogues)#mirrors native american women being pushed in brothels from the crushing roller of colonization stripping them of land#pushing them into poverty and homelessness#in ways that i um. raised eyebrow emoji to say the least. find deeply uncomfortable.
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mantisgodsdomain · 5 months ago
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We ought to write more Pokemon fic some time. We want to recreate the Pokemon Manners/Human Manners cheat sheet that we made a few years ago we think that this site would like the Sliding Scale Of Politeness When Greeting A New Pokemon You've Never Met Before.
#we speak#writing#we grew up with pmd games and we feel like the way that pmd pokemon's dialogue tends to be excessively... direct?#should be a feature and not a bug when any pokemon that you meet might be totally unfamiliar with your species and biology#it's probably very polite to start up front with some basic facts about yourself so they know how to act going forward#the very upfront feel to dialogue also very much helps with keeping the dialogue feel more... pokemon#people mock the series for weird npc dialogue a lot but we think that taking these things literally makes for more fun society building#it doesn't all have to fit with socially acceptable for our world we think. polite in our world isn't even consistent by household.#sometimes a polite interaction sounds like “hello! i'm poochyena! i like to chase people and bite!”#name and immediately socially useful information. now you know about the chasing people and biting so you don't assume it's rude#of course poochyena bites and chases people. it likes to do that. you can say you don't like that and it might stop doing that to You#but it will not stop biting and chasing people because that's what it likes to do and it will probably only befriend people okay with that#it makes a very specific dialogue feel that's very fun to do. we like how the pokemon world tends to treat any sort of like#disability or “weird” things as something that you just say out the gate and everyones like “oh okay”#and then treat that as Part Of Interactions going forwards. there are a surprising amount of parts of the pokemon manga#that are dedicated to working around a character's disability after one or all of their means of dealing with it get taken out#admittedly we aren't that caught up on newer content but we find the way that it tends to be just Accepted as very refreshing#making the dialogue this direct does also tend to make it read as more “childish” in english and particular because a lot of Maturity's jus#learning how to dance around what you're saying or phrase it in different ways to get your idea across differently#whereas here everything is just as direct as possible. “i don't like charmander”. “i like roasting berries”. “i want to dig things up”.#all pokemon dialogue tends to go towards being exceedingly simple and it makes for some very distinct writing#especially when you have to tackle complex situations with characters who probably dont employ that sort of vocabulary#though we personally enjoy doing this sort of stuff your mileage may vary ofc#we are biased towards this sort of thins because we find it MUCH more fun to build up what we're talking about from blocks#than to like. try and use more indirect wording that may lose things in translation#unfortunately this is not fun in irl conversation. everyone has to be on the same page and you need to use the same playbook to communicate#we REALLY wish people said what they meant though. we're really tired of being asked shit like “is this accessible”#when what they mean is “can you climb these stairs” a question which depends on the day our energy level and how things have been going#there are a lot of things we could say that would make us feel like some sort of anti sjw type guy and a lot of em boil down to just#"for the love of god dont dance around a Sensitive Topic just get to the point and ask us about it this just makes things harder for everyo
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maxiwaxipads · 6 months ago
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Romarriche - “Your company is one of a kind… I would never lie to you. I would never say a half-truth or be quiet.” “What is it in your mind, Merold?” “Hearing your voice, complaint or not—it is music to me either way.” Merold - “If there is one constant in this world… Let it be you.” “You’re the cruelest and the kindest thing that happened to me.” “…If only you continued to look at me like that.” Romarriche - “…Merold?” Merold - “But~ It’s only a minor case of bad-mood-itis.” “So Romarriche, spoil me with a spar, will you?” Romarriche - “Merold.” Romarriche - “Look at me.” Merold - “…” Romarriche - “Is something… Wrong?” Merold - “Instead of a spar…” “I might want to lie down on your lap after all.”
#fragaria memories#merold#romarriche#i wont lie i only had the first line and wanted to write something with it#i was reading this novel and i wanted to write something romantic </3#im gonna babble here on my own so you're always free to skip the tags...#if i remember correctly romarriche and merold were made knights around the same time and I work on that context#i like to think their relationship was rocky at first at romarriche's side who didn't want to befriend merold#compared to merold who thought he finally had a friend his age that was also a knight of fragaria#it was romarriche who looked at merold with a perceived perfection and was compared to him#“...I'll get better and strong. I'll impress everyone so I don't have to hear it--his name repeating over and over again.”#merold who says “if only you continued to look at me like that...” refers back to the past when romarriche didn't think of him favorably#but i like the double meaning to it “please look me as you did before and look at me as you do now”#“cruelest” and “kindest” i was a reading a novel that also used those words so I kinda grabbed from that </3#its really a cute novel though#me reading fragaria memories theories to see if it can at least make sense#i like this but i dont like this at the same time wwww#what does it say about its characters? as a writer i want to care about that because no dialogue should be said without reason#i think this dialogue is perfection but what am i writing this for? who does it refer it? what does it refer to?#but at the end of the day i simply want to indulge myself#something that could sound good and personal and something that could make people who read this smile and myself smile#Merold - “Will you make the promise to never change?”#Romarriche - “Change... But change in what way?”#Merold - “...”#Merold - “Because I'm a knight who fears a lot of things...”#Merold - “And I care about the Romarriche I have now.”#it was never supposed to be detailed but look at me now... </3
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deoidesign · 6 months ago
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wdym by "see" them? Do u have that thing where u cant see pictures in ur head?? 👀
oh, yeah, I mean I can see vague shapes but there's no color and it's like blurry and tunnel visioned at best
I can "taste" in my head pretty well and hear in my head even better though!
I think it makes me more satisfied with my art, because anything I draw will always be the only way I can see it... I've never struggled with the classic artist pain of it "looking so much better in my head" I'm always like oh hell yeah it looks so cool now that I can see it!!!
I also think it's why I have so much desire to draw. I have a lot of ideas in my head, and I want to make them real! I want to see them too!!!
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kaiserouo · 6 months ago
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So this is my setup for the last week or so
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Kinda hilarious, but I just wanna record how I draw for this week. More below if you're interested.
Last week my original laptop broke, and before it was repaired I only have a laptop borrowed from my lab. I don't wanna install big programs / drivers on it, especially CSP which requires switching devices. So I ended up using CSP on android phone. (I don't have an ipad so. yeah.)
You see, CSP on android is extremely good for an art program on phone:
Has exactly the same functions as desktop version. (Literally can do everything I wanna do just like I'm using desktop version)
Supports keyboard shortcuts if you attach a keyboard on it. (Other programs either don't support keyboard shortcut at all (e.g., medibang etc.) or are very very limited (e.g., Autodesk Sketchbook, basically only has shortcuts to swap to last brush or undo/redo))
Free to use for 30 hours per month. (Perfect for me because I don't even have to pay that $0.99/month subscription)
Have extended settings for phones. (e.g., you can set different actions for fingertip and tablet pen. I set fingertip to pan and tablet pen to draw (duh) when I didn't have a keyboard)
With a keyboard, tablet, USB hub and OTG cable, it can provide almost the same experience for me... with the screen size being its only problem tbh.
But I don't wanna waste that free 30 hours since I need to use this setup for at least 7 days. I ended up delegating the draft part to Autodesk Sketchbook. Almost no keyboard shortcut for basic functions: you have to use pan / zoom / tasso / transform by finger, but it's good enough for drafts.
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I don't really know how this might help you, but seriously if you have a tablet and a OTG cable it is already not a bad media to draw. With a keyboard it's basically the same as the desktop version. I guess it's a feasible choice for very specific scenarios.
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britneyshakespeare · 10 months ago
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not until i started reading restoration and post-restoration plays written by women like aphra behn and susanna centlivre did i fully understand romantic comedy on another level. the male love interests are just built better. like as much as i love a midsummer night's dream, if i were hermia i would never risk death or a forced life in a nunnery for lysander. no. hell no. he's just ken. but if i were miranda would i risk my thirty-thousand-pound inheritance to elope with sir george airy? if i were leticia would i contemplate leaving behind my country and my hated old husband i was tricked into marrying the second i learn that belmour is still alive, to live with his banished ass in exile? hm. let me thin—yes.
#text post#tales from diana#aphra behn#susanna centlivre#the busybody#the lucky chance#i think i enjoyed the men and the relationships in the lucky chance moreso than i did in the rover or the feigned courtesans#(the other two behn plays i've read so far)#i loved her characterizations of the women in both plays of course but i didn't quite feel myself in their situations#it was also quite more reliant on the same character archetypes#the modest one ends up with the selfless lovesick hero and the more innocent libertine one ends up w a reformed dashing rake.#and i'm ok w that right? like those tropes make sense. the plots and the witty dialogue are still enjoyable#but i find the lucky chance really upped the stake of the melodrama as well as the foils between the two main couples were more complex#you have one very melodramatic honest couple (leticia and belmour) who narrowly escape ruinous disaster#and then lawfully make their love official (most luckily BEFORE leticia has slept w fainwould and consummated the marriage)#and then you have the much more complicated and comical relationship between mr. gayman and julia fulbank#lady fulbank's marriage is done and done. no averting it. but she unabashedly carries a torch for him#she admits as much to her husband that she still loves him and she doesn't really care who knows#but she wants to be honorable to her marriage bc that's the lot she's chosen in life—his material comfort#and she does use that to the benefit of gayman when he's in financial ruin.#but her two stupid men. her lover and her husband. more or less work together to make her work against her own honorable wishes#she's compromised. and she SORT of gets what she really wants. she willfully foreswears the bed of her gross husband forever#and it's ambiguous whether or not she chooses to cuck him for gayman while he's still alive or what#very interesting ambiguous ending and i've never seen another character quite like lady fulbank in literature from that time#the lucky chance is worthy of far more study and interest than it's received. it's so funny and incredibly challenging#also. men don't hide in treasure chests enough anymore#more plots where men hide in treasure chests. thank you cymbeline by shakespeare and the lucky chance by behn. you guys got it
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girlfailurefelix · 4 months ago
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i’m so glad we’ve started to open up to the possibility that the MCI is pre-CC bite cuz i’ve been thinking this for a while (yeah kid can be traumatized by his brother being a dick, but still) and while i know no one likes to 1:1 everything, it was really solidified as a concept for me w vanessa’s thing in the movie considering i’m pretty sure the MCI kids are CC’s age so that would be a very intriguing parallel. like william doesn’t need a “good” motive, he can just be awful.
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sassmill · 2 months ago
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I just want to be allowed to scream at my sister the way she screams at me. I want to be allowed to slam doors and throw things and break things. I want to be allowed to react to the way she treats us and not be called selfish.
#hot fucking take but I don’t really see much dialogue on how fucking traumatizing it can be to live with an autistic person#whose autism outwardly manifests the most behaviorally#her not being able to help being dysregulated does not negate how fucking scary it is#to be on the receiving end of that behavior#and to be conditioned for your entire life that you’re bad if you react in any way#this is less about neurodivergence than it is about my fucking mother#especially because I’m likely on the spectrum as well#but if someone that wasn’t autistic did those same things it would be considered an abusive environment#I’m not saying that my sister is abusive#but I am saying that it is so incredibly emotionally damaging to live in this house#any harm done to me by the screaming and throwing and breaking things is not even allowed to be considered#because she ‘can’t help herself’#and the quotes there are again less about neurodivergence than my mother#because my sister actually has really solid coping skills… when my mother is not involved#my mother will make excuses and enables her in a way that is so frustrating#my sister would actually do much better if she were living in a dorm/group home like she previously was#but that costs a lot of money#and so she lives here with my enabling permissive mother#and is more dysregulated than she has been in YEARS#because so many of the skills and coping tools she learned at her resident program#she has completely stopped utilizing because she doesn’t have to#because instead of trying to work through it my mother will make excuses for her#so instead of trying to work through it she screams so loud my ears ring#and slams doors so hard they break#and throws things in a way that makes me scared she’s going to hurt one of us#but if I display any reaction to what in any other circumstance would be recognized as a frightening and harmful situation#I’m making things worse and I’m being selfish#I’m like. fine. in the way that I’ve had to be my whole life.#which is mostly dissociating and spending as little time home as possible#but every time it happens it makes me wish I was not alive
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icewindandboringhorror · 4 months ago
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recent things
#With the heatwave combined with being ill for like an entire week it seems I've lost like 16 days this month#where I basically did barely anything... grrr.... The passage of time... My Enemy...#Now that I can finally hold down food and stuff I'm feeling a little better mostly and my sickness has probably passed. But I still#feel weird a little bit like.. some lingering weakness or something. I think I'm just already having so many Problems at all times even in#my 'Normal' state that whenever I get sick or something my whole system is thrown off for a while lol#I'm supposed to be writing like 2000 words a day still ghbjhb... I've had multiple days of maybe 1000 - 1500. And a lot of days#where I write maybe 20 - 300. I've still been chipping away at the same single quest dialogue for all 20 something#days this month so.. AUGH.. Though that also counts the 16 days I did nearly nothing but be sick and overheated#I finally edited that whole big sims video I wanted to post!!! but now there's an issue with it ... T o T#My fault for still almost exclusively using windows movie maker in 2024 lol.. but HHHHhh.. It's like every once in a while randomly#a fully edited video will not be able to be exported. so evil for this to happen to my first sims build tour in a while. but alas..#ANYWAY... I have been slowly working on little things here and there.. in my little scraps of time.. Wishing to be fully productive at#some point. Maybe I can finally finish and post some things soon. like costume photos or sims videos and etc.#BUT HEY.. that solitaire thing is crazy to me.. I don't think I've ever finished a challenge in under 20 seconds#before. huzzah.. tripeaks squad.. OH.. and an image of#curly tail boye.............. he..... I took him to the vet for a check up and he seems surprisingly okay for a 16 year old. except he has#a mild thyroid issue or something so I'll have to give him medicine. But every time he goes in I'm always expecting them to be like#Sorry. Your Son Is Truly Doomed. or etc. so I'm always shocked when he's fine... a strange boy with many strange behaviors#so I can never tell if he's just Being Weird or if he's sick or soemthing ghjbjh#Also the bad thing about never ending summer heat is that when it IS finally cool for a few days. I don't want to do ANYTHING. It's like wh#n it's hot I feel too sick to do anything. And then when it's cooler I'm like 'OUU the first cool day in WEEKS.. i want to just relax and#fully ENJOY the coolness..'' So it's always constant warfare with my body like.. NO ..we cannot SLEEP. We must utilize this small patch#of Non Heatwave to finally be productive and finish things while we don't feel sick. But then it's like ''ohoho...to lay in the cold air of#the morning restfully.. i shall have a little nap with a blanket on for once.. perhaps.. tee hee'' Always at war with the Tired Sleepy#it seems. AAAANyway...... grr............ slowly finishing things. still usually missing my target writing goals..#Hopefully will have some actual art or costumes or something to post soon. Fumbling through the summer weather as usual lol
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auroral-melody · 3 months ago
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i saw like a "bad fanfiction bingo" thing and it kinda struck a nerve because there were so many things on there that were just like. either personal preference or things that were NOT inherently bad writing. i'm sure that plenty of the best fics i've ever read would hit some squares on that card.
it just reminded me that so much of writing is about context and intent.
using little-to-no punctuation is something that can be employed to great effect, if it's a stylistic choice.
script format? works perfectly well for something like homestuck as-is; also, that's such a vague description that includes screenplay and comic script fics.
moaning/screaming/laughing typed out? so context-dependent oh my god. huge fan of when dialogue is broken by a little -- ah -- during a scene, for example
"eye color compared to gemstones" really peeved me personally since like. yeah one of my favorite characters has amber eyes. like that's straight up on the wiki page. yeah sorry i compare my blorbo's irises to blue labradorite because they are blue and gold and have chatoyant properties. skill issue if you don't like that
i'm sure i'm willfully misinterpreting the intent of the post i saw a bit. i'm sure op would not universally claim every single thing they wrote is a Sign of something being Bad. but like. that's the problem with generalizing anything when it comes to writing
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