#but it sure Feels like I've been fired

[trans-xianxian]

my old boss who unceremoniously fired me over text message a week and a half before I was supposed to go back to that job is simply ghosting my request for an open letter of recommendation and has apparently told the kids that I quit. kill yourself

[nixiecat]

the "shave your pits" guy is back in my notes and this time is being transphobic to my followers so it's pit posting time again!!!

[sleepanonymous]

There's a video of Piano Hands Guy™️ Ves below the cut for this week's lost media post. It is a different setup from the others, but still does not show his face. There is a brief glimpse of neck and a lot of hand/arm (also a bit of shaky cam).

The title of this video was: Red Seas Fire- Skye (Live Piano Cover), which intends there was a normal piano cover that he did in his room but alas I don't think I have that one 😩 When you're done watching this video go listen to Skye and sit in awe of Ves's piano prowess 👍(also its an amazing song, so glad he indirectly introduced me to RSF).

March 2024 Update

RSF = Win indeed

[moe-broey]

@hulloitsdani I HAD TO. ROTATE THIS. IN MY MIND. SO MUCH. CAUSE HERE'S THE THING I think on the surface it COULD make sense and has SO much potential writing-wise and I have hardly thought about that before -- but!!!!

While I have been goofing on Ratatoskr and how she's just a poor little thang, upon meeting she DID tell Alfonse this:

Which gives you SO much information actually. Like. She knows a lot more than she lets on -- not because she's lying outright or even putting up a front, but because she's just. So overwhelmed and emotional and sensitive (LOUDLY so) that may be the only thing you notice, maybe even underestimating her. But I feel Alfonse took this information and did the opposite -- it's an odd position to be in, to be known presumably very well by someone who's a stranger to you. But I think he takes this in, and takes his first impression of her and her personality, motives, the conflict within her, and decides to put his faith in her.

I think ALSO he could be viewing her as a valuable ally, acknowledging:

I think, he sees she has potential, if he can win her over and have her fight on his side. I THINK. Primarily his motivation is practical. Making a quick judgement of her, coming to the conclusion she could be a valuable asset and could help the Heroes even more (going back to, him saying "She can even tell them I asked her to get us more information on the assassination plot" and "If our enemy thinks like I do... they'll see a similar opportunity in front of them.")

AUGH INTERRUPTING THAT THOUGHT THOUGH!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE!!!!!! PART OF THE GAMBIT IS "She would be a valuable ally" AND on the flipside "She could pose a considerable threat if she changed her mind and strengthened her resolve in the opposite direction (to kill me)" so winning her over is part of defusing the threat. AND it's an extra win to have all that information if she does choose the Heroes. AND it's an extra LOSS if she does leave, since she takes all that information with her AND has the advantage while the Order is left scrambling in the dark. Plus also!!!!!! Her having that intimate knowledge of his routines!!!!!! If he loses Ratatoskr, he Knows he's gonna suffer severe consequences.

ALSO. ALSO!!!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE!!!!!!!!!! That is WHY him letting her go and EMPHASIZING she can do whatever she deems necessary, EVEN giving her sisters inside knowledge on the Heroes. I FEEL LIKE. THIS IS ACTUALLY. VERY MUCH (on a much smaller scale!!!!) another Letizia moment. HEAR ME OUT

Right before The Moment, he's judging Letizia's character, what he knows to be true about her, her PERSONALITY and the way she thinks. Which leads him to go sicko mode on her (because! That Was the course of action to take with her!!!!)

THIS TIME. He's met with a very emotional, very distressed and conflicted assassin who seems to have a moral compass and is conflicted about what she's been ordered to do. In one way, she's almost like a bomb that has to be defused -- she Does pose a threat, and the threat needs to be addressed before it goes off/is out of his hands. And in this case, appealing to her emotions IS the answer!

AND. I THINK. PART of that appeal WAS to place That Much trust in her. ESPECIALLY communicating to her, she's not Required to remain loyal to the Heroes. Giving her a choice, between them and her sisters. He's heavily relying on Ratatoskr's internal conflict and also (surely it hasn't been missed on him) her attachment to him, or at very least her respect for him as a person she's come to admire. It's an extreme chance to take, but I think he knows if Ratatoskr can 1) Feel like she made the choice herself, and 2) He can catch her on another emotionally driven motivation (When she requests a favor in return, which is for the Heroes to Save her Sisters) -- I think he's fully confident he can win her over without forcing her to do anything.

WHICH. ALSO. HELPS WIN HER OVER BC her MAIN conflict she's struggling with is Being Forced To Do Something She Doesn't Want To. By NOT being forceful with her, by EMPHASIZING she can take any action she deems fit, he's set up a situation WHERE the Order of Heroes is the preferable option. He leaves her with the impression that her feelings matter, that she has agency, and ultimately it's up to her.

I FEEL LIKE........ I am talking in circles LMFAOOO BUT. I think Another thing (before thought interruption) was Alfonse's lines saying, "It's a gamble on our part, but if our enemy thinks like I do... they will see a similar opportunity in front of them." ESPECIALLY into:

WHICH stood out to me SO much because I think it really captures how practically motivated he IS here. He is using her. He's acknowledging, that if their enemy is Like Him, they're using her, too. He's creating a situation with a desired outcome, making the Order of Heroes the more desirable option to align with, giving her the feeling that she Can choose -- and, this is true! He's entirely put the choice in her hands. But in DOING that, it strengthens the possibility of her seeing the Heroes AS the desirable option. Which is the goal. Which is what he wants. He Is prepared, most likely, for the event this backfires, but also he's fully confident Ratatoskr Will choose them. (Also, as I say he was "most likely prepared for backfire"..... honestly that may not even be the case. Alfonse bluffs and bullshits his way around and out of things so much it would make Phoenix Wright blush).

WHICH ALSO LIKE..... AAAUGHGHHHH rotating him in my mind forever. You can See his traits and tendencies, see how he uses them for the benefit of his allies and those he cares about, but also SO clearly you can see. How A Lot of That is deeply rooted in his own moral compass (which is good!) and his own perspective (which is limited and sometimes flawed) and you can see. EXACTLY how these things can twist and turn and get really ugly LMFAOO

And man I haven't even gotten to Alear yet but I have THOUGHTS about his interactions w her too I need to make a separate post about LMFAOO 😅 (hit image limit and also feels like another topic entirely 🫡)

[icewindandboringhorror]

There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.

[guinevereslancelot]

decided to leave my job and i'm gonna fr gonna cryyyyy

[lilakennedy]

[ellieellieoxenfree]

What did BOC do?

assuming you are in good faith, anon, here’s a non-exhaustive list:

they allowed the KP novelists (poi and yok) unfettered access to the set, where they were filmed sexually harassing numerous members of the cast, including a minor they coerced into giving them massages

they failed to take action against the actors’ stalkers who doxed their hotels and flights and followed them on vacation, nearly drove their cars off the road, and broke into the BOC offices

ignoring poi’s accusations of plagiarism against sammon for the original 4 minutes script (prior to its retooling as whatever the fuck garbage it is now) and failing to apologize

continuing to side with poi after she falsely accused one of their actors, build jakapan, of plagiarism, abuse, theft, and a forced abortion, as well as setting up a months-long harassment campaign with leaks of private messages and photos, leading him to nearly commit suicide after his resignation and more or less blackballing him from the thai television industry. actors were also forbidden to mention him in any way.

in a major double standard move, forced build into an extended hiatus near the end of KP's airtime after twitter dug up decade-old problematic tweets and blew them up into a scandal, while ignoring 2024 allegations and receipts against bible for old, still undeleted social media posts that are in the same vein that got build canceled originally

pond, BOC’s CEO, continues to blame build indirectly in interviews over 18 months after the initial scandal (obliquely referring to him as though all of BOC’s past and present problems are laid at build’s feet), even though poi admitted in a settlement that the claims were false and build has entirely distanced himself from anything to do with BOC since his resignation

chose to announce jeff satur’s departure from BOC during a live event that was also streamed worldwide without informing nearly everyone in the cast prior, including bible (who’d just lost his scene partner, build, not long beforehand) and barcode (jeff’s scene partner, the minor who’d been harassed by yok and poi), causing a devastated barcode to burst into tears in front of the audience

held a reality show that included telling a teenager to get a nose job to ‘look less chinese’ and required the largely-teenage candidates to undergo an exercise in humiliating exorcism where they had to spill the skeletons in their closet in a public guilt and shaming circle

have been exposed numerous times stealing artwork for promotional materials

discarding the majority of their cast after KP finished airing, leaving actors signed to the studio but providing them no acting, sponsorship, or live opportunities, only to then hire several waves of new cast members for other projects, leaving the existing talent high and dry

failed to budget properly for their aborted ‘world tour,’ then blamed the actors

despite KP being a massive success, they claimed to be above BL for their next project, man suang (which pond trumpeted as the saving grace of new thai cinema and was partially funded by the thai ministry of culture), which failed to do anywhere near the gangbusters numbers expected of it, leading pond to walk back his claims and announce a man suang AU tv show, recently postponed from its original 2024 release date to 2025, which is supposed to be more of a light and fluffy BL romcom, rather than the serious historical piece man suang was originally advertised as. this was also apo's passion project and had almost zero promotion.

mile, who was the inspiration for the KP novel, coaxed apo back from new york (where he’d gone after a disastrous experience in lakorns in thailand) to star in KP by promising him BOC wouldn’t be similar to other studios, only to promptly turn around and have the guy who’d faced horrific amounts of colorism appear in ads for whitening products

have repeatedly insulted international fans (both in southeast asia and globally), including a canceled event in vietnam being blamed on bigoted stereotypes of vietnam being crime-ridden and unsafe, and using offensive/outdated content in their promotional materials

ultimately, whether you choose to support BOC or not is your decision and my judgment means nothing. for me, KP was a very good time for a few months and then a life-ruining time for three times as long as it was good, and i quite frankly would prefer never to have watched the show because BOC and its attack dogs caused so much pain to a huge number of people i care about, with none of the people either at the company or in the fandom ever bothering to take the slightest shred of accountability for their noxious behavior. i hope every day is a fucking misery for pond and i wish him all the luck and success he deserves, which is fucking none. when BOC burns down, let me know so i can reserve the time off to dance on its grave.

[demonio-fleurs]

there is no better joy in this world than finally being able to write something you've always wanted to write

like me wanting to write how hot sabo's body feels from koala's pov

[yo9urt]

i know やった is not considered to be part of the onomatopoeic/mimetic word family but it almost feels like it could be

[whimsicalcotton]

.

[girlbossdean]

life is so funny sometimes

[moe-broey]

HELP maybe this is influenced by how I'm writing this, or maybe it was supposed to be gleaned from canon and I just. Haven't fully thought about it til now. Haven't Deeply analyzed it beyond the blaring alarm bells that go off when reading this. But. Alfonse's,

Straight into.

This isn't him doubling down. This is him BACKTRACKING. This is him going, "oh fuck I think maybe I came on a little too strong maybe I was a bit too vulnerable and that's really scary. How do I fix this" and he's running through all the dialogue options in his head like Okay. Play it Cool. Keep it Casual. Proclaim your undying loyalty and devotion to your Trusted Partner (person he just told in the beginning of this conversation that he didn't intend to become friends with) by making yourself a blade and shield for them. NAILED IT 👍

[dihalect]

i need to post about palestine on facebook but i'm fucking terrified

[vuutarros]

I'm at the Dynalife to get my blood drawn, and they put my deadname up on the waiting list 😒

They have my preferred name in their system, I know this because I've come in, presenting as a guy, and had "Cait" entered on the waiting list. But today, I show up en femme, and my deadname is what is put on the waiting list.

Like I was dressed like this:

Ugh... Anyway, did not help the long ass wait, and I've been in kind of a shit mood since.

[miladysatsuki]

job interview in 4 hours.......