#but it still hurts like hell
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Hong Jiang, it's better if you don't know
This scene helped me understand why he couldn't actually give up everything and be with her. He stares at his soldiers stacking up the provisions supplied by Jing and he remembers when he asked Xiao Yao to quit being a princess and wander with him.
She said that if he gave up everything, she'd go with him. We see him still looking at the soldiers, at the responsibility and duty he couldn't give up for anyone.
He could make that choice, but he would no longer be the same man. He wouldn't have any self-respect. How could he stand beside her and not hate himself for his cowardice?
#i get it#i do#but it still hurts like hell#i admire his loyalty though#and his principles#lost you forever#lost you forever 2#xiang liu#mine
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And so, i did it.
I watched the last episode of "Vikings Valhalla"
How do I feel?
Exactly this
#vikings#vikings valhalla#vikings valhalla 3x08#canute x emma#emma x canute#king canute of england norway and denmark#queen emma of normandy#vikings canute#vikings emma#i still cannot believe it's over#i mean i knew it was fated to be this way#but it still hurts like hell#i haven't felt this way this since the Rolisla fiasco#well at least they were great in EVERY aspect#how am i supposed to get over them#and their last scene together... i can't think of it cause i start crying and i can't stop
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PAIN.
PAIN.
SO MUCH PAIN.
#my adventures with superman#my adventures with superman spoilers#my adventures with superman episode 5#maws#maws spoilers#maws clark kent#maws lois lane#maws jimmy olsen#clark kent#lois lane#jimmy olsen#clois#maws clois#i knew that this would happen#but it still hurts like hell#why#just why
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Love.
#And then nothing bad happened to them ever.#I hurt my arms rock climbing so they were shaking like hell for the first part of this so the proportions are a little strange#but it's about the FEELING!#Also look it was Ace's birthday just a few hours ago in my timezone this is still relavant#masked deuce#portgas d ace#monkey d luffy#sabo the revolutionary#revolutionary sabo#yamato one piece#one piece yamato#flame emperor sabo#my art#one piece#one piece fanart#yamato
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The Burned One
It's the Dark Souls of hair removal.
I am seeing results from the electrolysis, so it is actually a cycle that will end, but in the meantime, ouch ow goddamn FUCK OW.
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[Image Description: Comic, 8 images, one panel per image. Panel 1: Narration text on a black background, glowing cinders flying across the frame Narration: "It is a cycle without end…" Panel 2: A knight with brown hair wearing a green cloak looks out over a bleak landscape shrouded in fog, toward a distant castle. Narration: "You will make this journey" Panel 3: The darkened figure of the knight entering the castle, lit from behind as the light from inside comes in through the open doorway. Large pillars line the walls, darkened deeply by the shadows within. Narration: "Again and again…" Panel 4: The knight reaches toward a bright flame in an offering bowl, looking unsure and afraid. Narration: "Seeking to be cleansed of your curse" Panel 5: The knight's face is engulfed in flame as she grips her head, screaming in agony. Narration: "Again and again… you will BURN" Panel 6: The knight is on her knees, gently placing a hand on her face, which is burned and has smoke drifting off of it. She is surrounded by darkness, but appears to be kneeling in grass. Narration: "Then, once pain fades, and memory dims…" Panel 7: The knight is on the hilltop from the beginning, looking once more toward the castle. Narration: "…You will begin the cycle anew" Panel 8: Robin on the couch holding a bag of ice on her lower face, looking haggard. Her spouse Jordan is coming down the stairs and speaks, "Oh, you're back, how was electrolysis?" Robin answers, very articulately, "MRRRPHGH."]
#art#comic#trans#trans stuff#transgender#yes I know there are numbing creams and I use them; still hurts like hell
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NEW STILLS OF PRINCE REGENT AEMOND TARGARYEN AND QUEEN HELAENA TARGARYEN IN EPISODE 8 OF 'HOUSE OF THE DRAGON' S2.
#this scene hurts like hell#house of the dragon#hotd#hotd s2#tv shows#team green#aemond targaryen#ewan mitchell#aemond one eye#prince aemond targaryen#prince regent aemond#hotd aemond#phia saban#queen helaena targaryen#helaena the dreamer#helaena targaryen#hotd helaena#aemond x helaena#helaemond#hotd s2 spoilers#hotd spoilers#tv stills#hotd stills#photography#green siblings#the greens
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Exhausted yet still thinking of he.
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#DAtV#Emmrich volkarin#my art#can’t believe it’s next week omfg#also walking around London is even more exhausting than last year#my back hurts like hell still ahaha#I’m so excited for so much#there’s gonna be a panel for dragon age at MCM too and I hope I can take a peek#oh Emmy soon
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contrary to what's expected of them by nearly everyone in henrietta, skov and swan clean up their act just enough to fumble their way into their mid-20's. they begin to build a decent life for themselves — in part it's out of necessity, in another part for their own good, and lastly to honor their beloved late friends. they've been made acutely aware of life's delicate nature, and with no dream-thief-king left to remedy their mortality as he once did for his favorite forgery, they treat their existences accordingly.
they still enjoy getting rowdy from time to time, of course; skov is still too much of a stoner for his own good, while swan's in grad school and has always been the one to take his education most seriously, so he's more sparing about it (which isn't to say he's at all immune to a lazy-limbed heavy-lidded blue-haired boy sprawled out on their bed, his mouth holding secondhand smoke and the promise of hazy, handsy makeouts).
for the most part, though, their days are more relaxed, and they luxuriate in the simple things: the small intimacies of their joined morning routines, cooking a meal together, going to the gym or the park or the library. they treasure their time spent chatting and cuddling and kissing on their couch; jiang comes by, sometimes, to spend time with them and bask in their collective warmth, abundant with joy and comfort and love that they extend beyond the veil in the hopes it might reach k and proko. it feels good.
#skov x swan#the dream pack#the raven cycle#fmw art#my art#they both got kavinsky's ouroburos tattoo as a way to honor his memory (so did jiang)#they miss their friends </3 but at least they still have each other#both of them have a few other new tattoos too#i had to let skov keep his signature blue hair but he's grown it out a little! and swan ofc has grown and bleached his hair#i just want them to have nice things#ALSO sorry i had to like. include the cropped details it's hurting me aesthetically and spiritually#but i also know tumblr compresses the hell out of my larger images and wanted everyone to be able to see all the good stuff
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s1ep13 merlin, believing he will be dead by morning, goes to say goodbye to arthur and he leans against the door of arthur’s chambers and watches the glow of the fire light his skin golden, full of color and life that it had been sorely lacking while the prince was injured. he stares at the softness of arthur’s features and pressed the line of his profile into memory for while he passes he will wish for nothing more than to see arthur one last time, his smile and blue eyes one last comfort before he passes on to the otherworld. arthur turns to stare at him and frowns at whatever expression merlin is making. the prince kicks a weak foot out at the chair next to him and motions for merlin to join him. merlin slowly shuffles over but ignores the chair completely. he stops in front of arthur who watches him with wary confusion. the tug of his lips and the furrow of his brow sickeningly endearing and merlin allows himself to be selfish and leans down to press his lips to arthur’s.
the prince is sat frozen under merlin’s touch but he can’t find himself to care much about that, not when he finally knows what it feels like to kiss arthur. he hopes that will be his last sensation before the ever consuming nothing, he hopes he will close his eyes one last time only to find arthur grinning at him and calling him an idiot before leading him into paradise where he can watch arthur smile, hear him laugh, and feel his touch for all eternity. he pulls away and leaves before arthur can gather himself to form a response, dropping the letter explaining everything on the table as he passes. so he allows himself to be selfish twice - to take from arthur and to give, to let himself know what is feels to kiss the man, to embrace his feelings for him, and to have the man know him for who he truly is. he wishes to pass peacefully with no regrets. somehow that revolves entirely around arthur.
only…he survives the whole ordeal and yeah has a gnarly scar on his chest but is otherwise fit to return to his duties. which include taking care of the prince. of arthur. who he kissed. and who most definitely know about his magic by now. yeesh.
#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#merthur#s01e13 le morte d’arthur#fanfiction#fanfic#fic ideas#prompts#magic reveal#yippeeeeee#angst potential with the letter#did merlin explain that he was going to give his life for arthur’s in the letter? perchance.#now arthur’s in his chambers with tingling lips and parchment held loosely between his fingers#apprently he was kissed by a traitor. a sorcerer. an evil and wicked man#arthur doesnt really believe that. nor does he care.#what hes focused on rn is the part that details how merlin is going to willingly give his life in an exchange#too bad he can’t really move as he’s still weak from his injury and there was no way in hell his father would allow him to leave#not for the serving boy. not again. especially not after his near death.#so he’s stuck in his room and going out of his mind with worry#he spots gaius and merlin reenter camelot from his window and his worry falls into despair as he watches gaius clamber off his horse#and call for guards to help him lift merlin’s limp form and carry him to his chambers#(merlin passed out after the fight from both the strength of magic used to kill a high priestess#and from the pain of her fireball catching up to him bc his skin is literally melting off him)#(not literally but third degree burns hurt like a bitch do he feels his description is accurate)#arthur hobbles toward gaius’s quarters and stumbles in to find merlin thrashing on the patient cot and screaming and wailing#while gaius tends to his burn
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ngl its wild seeing people say toshiro's reaction to chimera falin was because she was not longer "palatable" to him like yeah i would be freaking the fuck out if my former party members' attempt to save someone important to us turned her into a murderous chimera on a rampage who just killed all of our party members in front of us and only barely had any traces of herself left in her. i WOULD want to, y'know, let her rest instead of attempting to defy death by further mangling her beyond comprehension because these people have shown they have no idea what they're doing and have apparently caused a fate worse than death for her. it's pretty much just the flip side of the coin and "letting falin go" is, in fact, a lesson the crew has to learn by the end
i don't think faligon is falin's "true nature", i think it's an extreme end consequence of her issues: one where she has little free will, is on complete autopilot, and is controlled by another person.
#dungeon meshi#toshiro nakamoto#shuro#like come on... it's a perfectly reasonable thing to think but no one actually takes the events seriously#he literally says later he just doesn't want her to kill anymore people#and he doesn't want to hurt her to begin with#literally what reason has laios' crew given to trust them with what he thinks they've done#i'm sorry his mindset is ''willing to let her go for the greater good'' and not ''everyone else can go to hell for all i care''...#he sees her with het feathers and fangs at the end and even acknowledges the dragon part of her!#and he still thinks she's so wonderful!
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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Imagine Jay, or Rogue in this case, learns of a women named Libber.
He’s told he looks so much like her, that his precious element was once hers, that this woman who he can’t remember is his mother.
And after learning that small bit of his (supposed) past, he clings to it desperately, almost protective over the information like a child over their only toy.
And then he meets Ed and Edna. And Edna looks nothing like the woman he was told about. So her love and her care and her affection is not needed nor wanted. This woman is not his mother. He doesn’t need such lies and manipulation from a person who claims to know him again.
This woman, who once all those years ago raised him as her own, because he is her own, took him in and loved him as a mother should and cared for him like a parent does, is lost to him.
I wonder how Edna might break knowing her son, her baby, doesn’t remember her, and completely rejects her. I wonder how Ed would feel knowing he can’t do anything to stop it, a stranger to the situation and to his son, his child.
#lego ninjago#ninjago#dragons rising#poor ed and edna#because i know even despite that pain theyre feeling watching their kid like this#they wont stop tryinb#theyll take him home#show him ohotos#and say even if he doesn’t they will love him to the ends of time#that they would do anything to keep him happy#and that even if he’s lost or scared he can still come back#no strings attached#hell even if it hurts them they would even tell Jay whatver they know of his birth parents#man i love them#ninjago jay#jay ninjago#jay walker#rogue ninjago#agent walker#technically#evil jay#ed walker#edna walker#ed and edna#ninjago edna#ninjago ed#ninjago dragons rising#ninjago libber#libber gordon#cliff gordon
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changing something crucial about Springdad's lore.
When he was, let's say, 10-12 years old, he was hanging around with his friends when they decided to do the usual stupid children activities, like jumping over fences. William climbed a protection fence, lost his balance, and cut his ear on the sharp edges. The cut was so bad they had to cut half of his ear off. That's how he got half a bunny ear.
#pretty sure he still laughs it off every time someone asks him about the ear#'let me tell you kid- it hurt like hell... and yeah i did not learn the lesson and jumped over that same fence a week after it all happened#springdad au
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ive been wondering forever about when exactly levi was kidnapped and taken to the heaven lab and this bit from his new unit's board here doesnt help much but i wonder if those are just the first words he remembers learning and not the first words hes learned overall.
mainly this is all just speculation based on 2 things:
1) he ofc had some sort of childhood before the heaven lab from how old he looked at the time, plus his selfie comic art looking younger than his sprite art from ch5 (look at his little horns plus his hair's grown out)
2) he does also just say straight up that he doesn't remember his life from before the lab
i wonder if that means he had to get reacquainted with the kings all over again too. like he wouldnt recognize them at all even with how it looks like they often played together. (tho i do suspect a little that some comics might have been done before there was a more coherent story put together but thats whatever)
#cliffnotes/.txt#whb#what in hell is bad#fun thought: itd be extra hurtful if the reason beel felt closest to levi was bc of them being close as young children#but levi remembers none of that + he doesnt trust anyone now anyways#i wonder if his friendship w/ them is less smthn he wanted after returning and more he Cannot get rid of them and theyre a package deal atp#extra extra thought: if the comics r still canon to the timeline then it looks like levi was always a little introverted#even liking his coffin before everything happened#and it just got worse afterwards bc then it was the only place he felt safe#wait one more#interesting how levi looks like he'd be around maybe 10-12 in the ch5 flashbacks#(tho considering the number they gave him hes probably been in there a long time)#and that age would be pretty close to the mc's age when their parents were killed by im suspecting gabriel or angels under his command#i wonder if they'll talk about that later#how the angels stole both (and more) characters' childhoods
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Maybe you need to sleep longer and deeper, so you can see more details of your dream. You're the one who told me that this dream isn't like the others.
—I SAW YOU IN MY DREAM · Episode 11
#i saw you in my dream#i saw you in my dream the series#ryu ingkarat#putter phubase#yu x ai#isyimdedit#thai bl#thai drama#bl drama#bl series#i had to gif this to get the heartbreak out of my system#what the hell kind of plan was that ing??#i was half sure ai would end up in hospital#but we still have one more ep to go#in which ai can prove how little he thinks of his own self :))))))#i'm in this series and i don't like it#OH AND ALSO#the thing is#yu in ai's dream was hurt yes but he wasn't dead#he was going to be fine#regardless of ai shouldering all the bad karma#but ai's dreams are filled with anxiety and fear of abandonment#and i still don't think fate is why they keep getting worse#by pharawee
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TUE timeline but instead of the plot we get in the show, "Dark Danny" is just a 24yo version of danny that smokes and drinks and hates everything. (understandable).
IDK how Vlad would develope as a dad in 10years but i know he's bad at it. Danny being this self destructive at 24 either means he's in direct contact with Vlad still and he's terrible or Vlad's honestly mellowed out but they're not on speaking terms. or someting..... idk.
mostly thinking about this because messed up adult danny who smokes beamed itself into my brain. leather jacket and mean and even if he grew up with a baby face they don't card him at the liquor store anymore because they see the light has left his eyes, etc. that type of deal.
idk how that version of TUE could be plot relevant though, except some kind of "finding yourself" journey for "current" Kid!Danny to go on but that would be fucked up. a younger version of you gets sent to you as a "what not to become" case and your literally just existing, maybe committing crimes, but mostly just there.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#dark danny#tue#the ultimate enemy#vlad masters#danny phantom the ultimate enemy#maybe he's addicted to other drugs too!#but then there's the thought that drugs might not have the usual affect on him due to halfa biology#but that's applicable to nicotine and alcohol so i can do what i want#Dark Danny but the dark part remains more focused on the fact he lost everyone he loved#rather than becoming superpower evil in some convoluted way that makes him want to blow the world up#i think this version would also want to blow the world up but he still doesn't want to actually hurt people he doesn't know that bad#because with the abilities danny has he could#he has little reason not to now#but he doesn't#SELF DESTRUCTION INSTEAD!!!!!#nevermind my insane rambling#imagine you find an alternate future version of you that's epic as hell but only because he has HELLA issues#would you feel bad that he's like that or excited that he's cool as fuck?
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