#but in all seriousness i think they're having issues coming to terms with the fact that i am indeed 25 and am going out and doing things

[velvetvexations]

my personal take on "antigonism" is that it's entirely what you make of it. which is to say, i agreed with your post explaining why you felt such a term was necessary, and i do think this mentality of "most of us are normal about each other" and simply assuming we understand each other's experiences by virtue of being trans is reinventing artificial gender solidarity between cis people ("bros before hoes", "girl's girl") but superimposed onto trans people. which can be particularly contentious, given that we're an extremely traumatized bunch with a lot of baggage and massively diverging perspectives on all kinds of things. relating to each other outside of conventional gender relations means we have to put in that much more work to bridge the gaps between us, because we can no longer rely on the common assumptions made about men and women to carry our interactions, if that makes sense.

i do think a whole word for transfem-to-transmasc solidarity does toe a line between being unnecessarily inflammatory and conditionally useful. i'm genuinely glad for the people who felt seen and appreciated by the fact that a transfem made so explicit her stance on intracommunity issues. i'm also sympathetic to the people who feel put-off by such a word. when does allyship become chauvinistic? there is no word for a non-misogynistic man to signal to women that he is explicitly anti-antifeminist, for example. do we need one? i think a vast majority would say no, on account of simply stating he believes in feminist principles to suffice. so i'm wondering what specifically the push was for you to coin a word around tfem4tmasc solidarity, because while i do think trans people as a whole need to take significantly more initiative about rooting out transmisogyny and transandrophobia both, i'm not quite clear on what could signal more clearly a transfem's stance on intracommunity dialogue than just saying "i believe in transandrophobia and condemn all radfems". all feminism, transfeminism included, has had their malicious actors-- the existence of transradfems isn't really anything noteworthy as far as the broader feminist conversations go.

i hope this doesnt come across as confrontational because i think the people who found comfort in the fact that you are willing to go that far for them is truly heartwarming. i just don't want to see us splinter further into microfactions over something like one person coining one maybe-overenthusiastic word on the internet

Sincerely, there is a word for men who are anti-anti-feminist, though, they're feminists. Granted, self-identified "feminist" men have somewhat of a negative stereotype associated to them, but still, feminist men are feminists.

One of the biggest reasons I think a term would be useful is because so many people feel unsafe in the trans community because of trans radical feminism right now that it can help them relax a lot when they see a trans woman identifies as such. Just reminding people with assurances that most trans women are Normal doesn't really help that when they keep running into ones who aren't over and over.

TRFs are aggressive about this stuff. Seriously, every single day, post after post, their primary form of activism is crying about TMEs stealing kinks and liking a children's toy too much. I feel strongly that should be countered. Even if they aren't the majority, they sure as hell act like it and repeat how great it is that every single trans woman except velvetvexations alone agrees with them.

To be absolutely clear, I do not think I'm the only non-weird trans woman! That is just literally what they say about me! They may be the minority now but that frog is boiling.

IRL transmascs are forced out of spaces and talked over when they're let in because mascuwinity is scawy, No doubt transfems have similar problems because some spaces are TERF-y, but that problem is exacerbated when social media is filled with TRF rhetoric because it gets drilled into people's heads they need to be worried about that, and I don't think "touch grass" is a good response to that.

Hell, what if someone touches grass and then they do happen to end up having people be transandrophobic/exorsexist/intersexist/etc. to them? "Oh, well, that didn't count, try again somewhere else, I prommy that's not Normal."

It's all about volume. I feel very, very strongly that volume is necessary here, to combat the feeling that that radical feminism is around every corner and help people feel at ease and know trans women are with them.

[darkfictionjude]

Okay so I know this is a touchy subject already especially since certain people have already been bitchy about it before, but sometimes Crowny is genuinely difficult to play as. I feel super conflicted about them since they're the literal personification of "damn bitch you live like this?"

Realistically, progress isn't linear and different people get different results even if they do the exact same thing, but as of now it feels like they aren't really allowed to improve at all. If you study you're still mediocre leaning towards bad in terms of understanding. You try to workout you see absolutely no results, not even the tiniest bit. When it comes to the other characters, it's always one step forward and two steps back. When you give them a hobby or try to get them to pick up a skill they find little enjoyment. When people bother them they barely fight back or even argue, and when they do it's like a sarcastic quip or a grumble at most. By the end, they haven't even made a dent. These don't make them less of a person and it doesn't make them a failure since the world is quite literally out to get them, but it's like they aren't allowed any satisfaction in their life. (Yeah it's been like a month, maybe barely scratching two in the current timeline so maybe this contradicts what I first said about progress but I'm dumb as hell)

It's wild to go from the side quests, backstory segments, interactions with the ROs and then Crown family just for all the hype to fade when there's a segment with just Crowny all alone. I know that there's a reason for why they are the way they are, but I literally have to take breaks from reading their solitary moments sometimes because it seems to drag on. I know things aren't easy in this universe, I know the world is supposed to be cruel and unfair, but like can they at least get a cake for their efforts? Or a hug? Or be able to sleep through one night and wake up well rested?

I hope I'm not sounding like an asshole or a insane here. Personally, they're relatable in a lot of aspects. I may not have had supernatural shit going after me, but I had a lot of issues that many of their experiences brush way too close to. It's just the way it's presented that makes them feel like they're like the random piece of chewy cartilage in an otherwise perfectly cooked steak, unpleasant but I'm gonna eat it anyway.

I literally just wrote a whole ass book complaining, but I at least wanna say I do love your work, Crowny included even if my words seem to say otherwise, and I'm super excited to see what happens in the timeskip since i know this is like JUST the beginning. I'm like seriously praying my tone is coming off the right way if that's even possible. If you read through all this thanks. I'm not gonna hide behind anon because I at least wanna be able to explain myself if this comes across wrong.

but like can they at least get a cake for their efforts? Or a hug? Or be able to sleep through one night and wake up well rested?

Well no 😭😭

And that comes from the fact that they are self loathing, depressed as hell and have virtually no support system while dealing with things that they aren’t mature enough to handle, actually their mental health is getting far worse which is by design

I feel like perhaps some readers have not realized just how depressed crowny is. All the things you described about them finding little enjoyment, etc., are key markers of major clinical depression

I feel also people did miss the fact that crowny kind of exploded in the library they didn’t shut up, they didn’t let it go which I think is a positive because this is the first time they’ve have enough to say “enough”

Sorry but I like my things slow burn 💀 that Halloween party is meant to be a breakthrough for them and I think perhaps it’s been glossed over by some because what happened to James has gotten the most attention and the final moment in the woods. Crowny outed their “friends” for the first ever and fought back against their tormentor in only one single night. James for all his issues did the one thing that broke the camel’s back and pushed Crowny over the edge, all 7 episodes have led to this

Crowny is meant to fall before they come up that’s how I wanted it because realistically someone could not handle all of this without losing their mind. It has barely been two months, Crowny has only seriously hit the main plot in episode 4 which in the current timeline was about 3 weeks ago (from episode 7)

Truly the progress that crowny did make in episode 7 should have taken longer, people with crowny’s issues spend years in therapy before they feel they have the right to fight back.

There’s a reason episode 7 is the midseason finale. It’s not only about the plot but about crowny themself….

Dw you’re tune is fine I can usually tell when someone doesn’t think before they write 😭

[abunnsburrow]

Scrambles in

is this the right? Yeah? Okay-

I'm here again, back with my deranged ramblings!

Today I wanna talk about Nya, not a surprise but I wanna talk about a specific timeframe of her's which is Season 3.

I find early seasons Nya both frustrating and fun because of her general lack of characterization. It's aggravating in the sense that she doesn't really get treated as a character because of being the Girl but it's also fun to take all the little details and try and build a narrative out of that.

That being said let's talk about the infamous Love Triangle!

So this thing is a mess. That's obvious and Nya is a big part of that. We've never seen her interact with Cole before this so her feelings very much feel out of the blue. Why is that? Well there's actually a simple answer to that: she doesn't actually have feelings for him.

We see early in the season that the relationship between Jaya is kinda iffy. While it isn't big there's clearly at least some troubles and it isn't perfect. It seems relatively standard but it is setup for the start of why Nya ends up acting the way she does.

Jay: Hi, Miss Nya. I saved you some pudding. Nya: What did we talk about? Jay: Oh, right. Boundaries.

I do want to state that I fully believe they are together in a semi-official sense. When others talk about them it's as if they're boyfriend and girlfriend, and they talk about each other like they are. It's also important that Nya does like Jay back, the prime example I can think of is the expression she makes when one of the students mentions the idea of Jay being her "Perfect Match".

Like- come on it couldn't be more obvious.

Back on topic: if she does like Jay and I just said that she doesn't like Cole then why does she have so much conflict about it? The answer is that Jay is probably her first relationship.

Nya is a curious person and considering there have been some issues in her relationship, and this is most likely the only romantic relationship she's been in, she probably has doubts. So when she's straight up told Cole is her "perfect match" that probably makes her start to wonder and idealize the idea of what being with other people could be like. This becomes especially obvious when one of the main reasons she lists for liking Cole is that he "isn't Jay". In fact, this is repeated within the season itself!

Nya: Am I that obvious? What do I do? Jay's the only one who makes me laugh, but Cole...Cole's not Jay.

S3 Episode 2

Nya: Seriously? A blue or black wire. I have to cut one of these wires to shut it down, but cut the wrong one and it may crush you guys instantly! Jay: Ooh, choose blue, Nya! You know blue! You're comfortable with blue! Cole: Choose black! Black is not blue!

S3 Episode 3

(These are just off the top of my head there might be more examples but I can't remember them atm)

So this makes me believe that her feelings of Cole are more so a projection of her curiosity and craving for something different and new. Especially since Cole seems like the opposite of Jay in a lot of ways so naturally she would fully lean into that idea.

All of this is subconscious meaning Nya doesn't know this which is why she has such a hard time with it. She hates this entire situation and definitely would prefer it to be over sooner rather than later. Visually Nya constantly looks stressed and avoids talking about it because she doesn't know how to solve it and Nya isn't the best in terms of handling her own feelings.

There we go, my little analysis as to the how and the why of the S3 love triangle on Nya's side!!

I will be making a sequel to this talking about Season 4 so stay tuned for that but for now, enjoy my thoughts as someone way too invested in a little lego gal! Adios!

[kathleenkatmary]

Seriously though, the character work that's being done by Vic Michaelis as host!Vic on Very Important People is so incredibly impressive, and it's better than what we get from a lot of traditional narrative shows. I think it's particularly impressive because the format of the show, in terms of both the fact that it's improvised and that everything we see, all of the information we get about them, their life, and their personality, comes entirely from what happens and what is said in the interviews. Vic's Ex-Step Grandmother is the only episode so far where the guest is someone that Vic knows, who is tied directly to their life and their past and where the interview itself gives us a significant amount of information about them. With most of the others episodes we still learn a lot about host!Vic, but everything we learn about them in those interviews is sort of indirect. It comes in not just the questions they ask, but how they ask them. It comes from their response to the answers. It comes from seeing the bits where they interact with the crew. From the small tidbits of info they drop about their husband, their step daughter, etc. in response to something the guest has said or done. From the way they relate to the guests and the relationships they develop with them.

And even within those things, it's still done in really subtle, indirect ways. So much of it comes from Vic's facial expressions, or their tone of voice.

Think about the way we'd usually learn these kinds of things about characters in more traditional narrative shows. There would be a lot of scenes of them interacting with people close to them. We'd see them doing different things that are specifically relevant to whatever the writers want us to know about them. There would inevitably be some level of expository dialogue about their life, their past, the personality, and their issues.

We get very, very little of any of that with Very Important People. We have to learn everything about host!Vic from what happens during these interviews. We don't even, so far anyway, and aside from the episode with their Ex-Step Grandmother, have an outside perspective on who host!Vic is, what they're like, etc., at least not from anyone who actually knows them. We'll sometimes get comments from the guests about what they're observing in the moment, and occasionally Vic will say something that other people, usually the crew, have said about them. But we have yet to get any kind of outside perspective from someone who really knows them (again, outside of the one episode with their Nana), to tell us "they think they're like this, but they're really like this" or "they always do this when they feel this way or that way", or even to inform us of what Vic might be like just based on how they act around them. That is so often in storytelling an incredibly important part of how we learn about a character: seeing and learning about how the other characters who really know them see and feel about them. So far, that has not really been an aspect of how we learn about host!Vic. It's pretty much all come entirely from Vic's performance and the choices they've made.

Honestly, really thinking about it, I'd say that if I had to compare it to a more traditional narrative series (in terms of this specific topic), I'd say the closest one would be In Treatment. I'm only referring to the 2008-2010 run with Gabriel Byrne. I have not seen the more recent reboot, nor have I seen the Israeli original. For anyone who is unfamiliar with the show, episodes run about 30 minutes long, and they take place pretty much in real time, with each episode covering a therapy session between Byrne's character, the therapist, and a patient. The series was almost entirely limited to those sessions, so pretty much everything we would learn about both the patients and Byrne's character came from the discussions that happened in those therapy sessions.

It's still quite different though, for several reasons. With VIP, Vic doesn't interview the same character twice (at least not so far), so the relationship built between them is limited, so the information that we can learn about Vic (and the character who is being interviewed) is also limited. With In Treatment, Byrne's character sees the same patients every week. So we do get to see relationships develop between them and as those relationships grow we learn more about the characters based on those relationships. Also, the fact that they're therapy sessions kind of inherently means that we're going to get some real digging into the characters. And that goes for Byrne's character, too, because the last episode every week is always his session with his therapist. A whole episode every week to deeply explore his character, his relationship with his patients, etc. We get nothing like that for host!Vic. Nothing where they can examine their feelings or actions, nothing where we can deeply dig into the things that happened in their life that might be causing the emotional reactions we see, etc.

So while I think that there are some strong similarities between Very Important People and In Treatment in terms of having similar formats where pretty much everything we learn about the characters come from these conversations that happen between two people in a short span of time, by having those conversations happen in the context of therapy sessions, In Treatment is pretty much entirely designed to be able to naturally dig into information about the characters and explore it. Whereas Very Important People almost feels like the opposite. Interview shows like this, in reality, tend to be pretty artificial. Even the ones that do get really personal and really dig into people's lives. Regardless of how personal an interview might get, both the interviewer and the interviewee absolutely, without question, do a ton of prep work and rehearsing. Even when an emotion that's shown is honest, it's unlikely that it's truly a pure, in the moment reaction. So trying to really show who a character is through the format of an interview show, showing us only what happens in the interview and nothing else, is absolutely going to be a challenge. But Vic Michaelis is doing such an impressive job with it. We see their sort of 'host facade', and even with that they do such a really stunning job of making it so clear the image that host!Vic is trying to put forward and why. And then they go so much deeper with the ways that mask is constantly slipping and all of the things they decide to show us underneath it.

I think the most impressive part of it all is exactly what we're shown and when. Michaelis has been really smart about what information to let out at what times, which bits of information or emotion to show with each character they interview, etc. Think about how little of the show, at least when it comes to the guests, so far has directly related to Vic and their life, and now think about how much we already know about them, both their life and their personality/flaws/desires/insecurities/etc. And it's all improvised. This would all be impressive even if this was all scripted and there was a painstaking plan for how and when to reveal each bit of information, but the fact that each episode is improvised and they don't even know who the guest is going to be until the person has been all made up just makes it even more impressive.

And really, I think even just the fact that it is an interview show is so interesting. Because interviews/interview shows are so artificial, so just the choice to use that as the sort of medium through which to explore this character is fascinating to begin with. But the way host!Vic is sort of presented to us in that context is also really interesting. Because the host version of host!Vic is so artificial, and throughout the show so far we've seen them desperately trying to project that artificial version of themself. But the reality of who they are inevitably breaks through. And it usually breaks through more the more they develop a relationship with the guest. Which just brings us back around to how fascinating it is that in this improvised show where they have no idea who they're going to be interviewing that the information we learn about host!Vic really does come down, if not entirely then a significant amount, to who the guest for the episode decides to be and how they may or may not relate to or appeal to host!Vic.

I love all of Dropout's gameshows and such, but I really think that Very Important People is by far the most impressive show they've got on right now. I think it's the most impressive thing I've seen from them. It's so unlike anything else on television and it's using stuff that's so completely unusual for television as it is now to tell character stories that are actually really compelling, and to find different ways to build and explore character.

[dd-the-man-without-fear]

First of all, GOOD FOR YOU DUSTIN NGUYEN! CALL OUT THEIR BULLSHIT!

And second, i love the fact Image Comics gave him a like, anybody remembers the birth of Image and they know that Marvel and artists in particular have had long running issues.

I wish everyone be like Dustin and stand up for what they believe in.

Here's his caption on the post for those who don't want to join a ghost town owned by Mark "evil cyborg lizard steals data" Zuckerberg.

‘ok.

getting hits earlier than expected from this one, and I'm kinda glad because I got words.

but really if this bothers you I'm sorry, [@]marvel has been undercutting creators from the start, unless you're getting 6-7k a cover- then godbless. I hope you're getting a piece of the MCU and after sales.

between them and [@]dcofficial , they are the ONLY one that DOESN'T pay a royalty for overseas sales- THINK- AMERICA is the originator of Superhero comics( Japan has manga which we love, Europe, has that cool ass shit we love but can't describe) and wtf? they're not paying creators a piece? COME ON. FUCK this FUCKING SHIT. also, merch? lunch boxes and tees- good luck.

I got a buncha dms from people telling me I gotta be careful, " don't cross Marvel, they're a major player, the only two in the mainstream".

omg fuck them.

man, like I give a FLYING FUCK. FUCK [@]marvel comics, fuck anyone that I'm NOT in directly working with.( I LOVE my marvel editiors because they get you your BOOKS OUT TO YOU ON TIME )the direct staff has no control, they don't juggle the stupid fucking numbers.

I'm gonna break it into simple ass fucking terms-

you're an artist. you draw shit. you wanna get paid for shit. now. in the future. FOREVER .

you draw NOW AND IN THE FUTURE. IN COUNTRIES EVERYWHERE INCLUDING THE ONE YOU DON'T LIVE IN.

fuck this current Marvel contract. I'm too small in the tier and can't negotiate a better one for you. those in control, those whose work pull, please work for the rest of us.

DC isn't far from them because after all, they are a conglomerate of things- owned by WB doesnt help your argument. BUT when I ask for things, DC works with me.

I've asked Marvel for like.. I SWEAR, $75 PAGE RAISE in the past 15 years( the minimum wage in CA is doing better than them, probably in a decade, even that asshole Trump will do better than Marvel given a month) , I don't even need that shitty chump change, but I want to see how cheap they are. all this equalling maybe a royalty that's the, " please sir, can I maybe have .15 cents after you've made your thousands", in things.

no response. so what am I treading carefully for again? I seriously forget.’

[creature-wizard]

I'm gonna post my controversial thoughts about Jesus 'cause they've been stewing in my head for awhile and I gotta let 'em out.

This isn't going to be me just hating on Jesus for the sake of it. However, it's also challenging to orthodox views of who Jesus is, and I can't say it's all going to be flattering.

Read ahead or don't; but if you do, don't say I didn't warn you.

So. My controversial thoughts on Jesus basically come down to: I think he was a complicated human being, living in a complicated time, responding in a way that made sense to him.

I've read the Gospels with particular attention on Jesus's character, and... in terms of his overall personality and behavior? He reminds me a lot of self-styled spiritual leaders who have a lot of wonderful high-minded ideals where some things are concerned, but are also kinda up their own asses at times. Like the way his followers will ask him some normal question or respond to something in a completely normal way, and he treats them like they're stupid because they didn't manage to clock his quite frankly incomprehensible headspace.

Of course, the narratives are on Jesus's side, so we're supposed to believe that if these guys had just read the Scriptures a little better or had been in a holier headspace, they'd have immediately figured it out. But lots of life experience has taught me that this isn't how anything works. I've also met people who act like this, and I have learned that they are often best avoided, and never to be taken seriously as spiritual teachers.

Also, some of the stuff the Gospels have him doing and saying suggest to me that he may have been prone to mood swings. Like he says a lot of great things about love and compassion! But then he also says a lot of stuff that's just... kinda mean, if not vindictive. Which, that's a characteristic shared by a lot of spiritual leader types that I have come to learn are not the kind of people you want to get too close to.

When I look past the miracles (a number of which are very easily demonstrated to have been embellishments of somewhat less glamorous historical fact), the overall picture I see is someone who had the same kind of charisma as a lot of the people I research. These people also want you to believe that their odd, erratic, and even mean behavior is a manifestation of their divine or enlightened nature.

Do I think this means Jesus was incapable of having good opinions, or that he never said anything worth our attention? No, absolutely not! Again, I think he was a guy, living in a time, doing his best. Sometimes he was a dick, sometimes he threw out bangers. I think love and compassion are supremely important, but I also don't think he has a monopoly on it. (I also think Christianity thinking it knows love better than anyone else and believing it can provide the best access to it is kind of an ego issue.)

And of course, I don't expect to talk anyone out of being Christian with this, nor is that even my aim. These are just my personal opinions based on my observations, that's all.

[khaoala]

I've been trying to interrogate my own feelings re. all the sulky/jealous First shenanigans, because I haven't been able to enjoy them as much as I wanted/expected to, and (bear with me on this, I'm still trying to sort it out in my own head!) I think it comes down to the fact that First hasn't quite received the same recognition as an actor that Khao has, and I don't just mean in terms of awards/nominations, but things like JoJo's dream cast including Khaotung, Gun, Fourth (and possibly someone else?) but not First, or Khaotung more frequently getting name-dropped by other GMMTV actors. I'm not saying First never gets praised, or that he's not considered an excellent actor, but I do think that if asked to name great actors, most ppl would think of Khaotung just that millisecond before they'd think of First. And I'm sure a lot of that is down to the nature of roles they've played and how a character like Ray or a subplot like Gaipa's mum in MLC are scene stealers that - understandably and rightfully - stick in ppl's minds. So this isn't me trying to say one is better/worse than the other or that there's a gross injustice in play (though I do think First as Akk should have received much more recognition!). But with that in mind, when there's talk about future collaborations and jokes about Khaotung moving on, even though I'm sure it's 99.9% unserious on First's part, I do wonder if that 0.1%, on some level, worries about being left behind or holding Khao back, not because I think that's in any way grounded in truth or that Khao himself would ever countenance that, but just because of that wider context I mentioned in terms of their relative status in their field. And also because we know that First, however confident he is in his abilities, is also an incredibly sensitive person. I'm trying to imagine a role reversal, where the same scenario played out but with someone wanting to collaborate with First, and maybe it's just me but I can't quite picture it playing out in the same way, and not because Khaotung isn't possessive/protective of their relationship, but just because...I don't know! It feels almost like there's an unspoken agreement that of COURSE everyone wants to work with Khaotung and of COURSE he's going to go on to great things, that I just don't quite feel would be applied to First in the same scenario, which means the joke wouldn't work in the same way. Or maybe it's just that First gets teased more full-stop and I'm the one being oversensitive! I promise I'm not one of those fans who catastrophises or sees disaster/estrangement in every tiny thing, and it's not that I'm worried myself about the future of their partnership. Like I said, I was just curious about why, despite the chuckling, I was feeling slightly uneasy, and that's what I came up with! We know First is ambitious as an actor, that he takes it incredibly seriously, that he WANTS to win awards, and no matter how selfless his love for Khao is and how proud he is of him, I think it's a little naive to pretend he's never once felt anything bout the fact he's yet to receive that same recognition, especially when they're working alongside each other - that doesn't mean he's jealous of Khao, or that he's a bad person or bad friend/partner, or make his happiness for Khao's success any less genuine. So yeah, I couldn't help but wonder if, beneath all the hilarity and silliness and OTT sulking, there wasn't just a kernel of genuine insecurity. I mean, it'd be very on-brand of First to turn his actual fears and doubts into a skit starring himself as the butt of the joke - that's just classic people-pleaser with self-esteem issues behaviour, and the reason I recognise it is cos I'm one too! Sorry for rambling. Don't really know why I felt the need to word vomit all over your blog - think I was trying the whole 'name the thing then the thing no longer has any power over you' trick!

ngl, this rise in talk about fk and vibes and interactions have been bothering me since it started a couple of weeks ago and i'll adress that now for the only time bc i feel the need to, like yourself anon, let this out just so i can feel a little better. pls know that despite referring to you, i don't mean to sound mean to you in specific, anon. it's more of a general impression of what i've seen on somsomtw recently and especially. i do realize that i'll sound a bit aggressive in this, but it's nothing personal to you.

people have been complaining about fk joking about this "moving on" thing, and working with other artists for the past three days (just bc they happened to have three days in a row of events, in first's case) but they only started joking about this bc fans have been senselessly talking about them having a fight that never existed and they leaned on that. quite genuinely, in the last couple of years that i've been in this fandom, this is the first time these things took so much force. it's imperative that we, as fans recognize when they are joking for funsies and given their nature and public image, they would never ever make it obvious if they were actually having a fight or a disagreement (the fact that people have been dead set on the idea that first has a girlfriend just bc of those pictures he posted on valentine's day and taro cards just adds to the histeria me thinks).

as actors, we all must agree that both first and khaotung have been severely underutilized by gmm (by choice or bc projects weren't presented to them, both are viable options). and i completely agree with you in the sense that first especially has not received as much direct praise as khaotung has. you mentioned the possibility of first somehow feeling like he's holding khaotung back which reminded me of someone (i can't remember who, i'm sorry) saying that when they got paired up, first solo fans were pissed bc first was definitely the most known of the two and that khaotung would be the one holding first back. i think it's really naive of us to think that, with the relationship they have, we assume that instead of talking about their insecurities with each other (like we know they've done in the past when they chose to let us know) and have a mature conversation between them, they'd talk about it in front of cameras. they know they have an image and a reputation, do we really think they'd bring that up if it wasn't just for jest?

(and this is what first himself talked about in his press talk after today's event, too)

you know what bothers me a little about this "khaotung can move on to do other things talk"? so far we're only aware that he might or might not have a collaboration with other artists for lol, but besides that he has no other projects (and he didn't have any solo events this year, too, besides the qingdao fm), but first is confirmed and will start filming for my magic prophecy really soon, so honestly, in theory, shouldn't people be saying the opposite? like first is moving on to act with other people for real, it's actually happening, but there are some people who are pressed by the possibility of it happening for khaotung. and might i add too, idk if this happens with every couple, but idk where this idea of working with other people became "this is the end of their career as a cp, they are getting other partners" (not you anon, but i've seen this quite a bit around), and i don't know what kind of mental gymnastics some of you are doing to justify that. WORKING WITH OTHER PEOPLE IS GOOD. THEY ARE ACTORS. THEY NEED THE EXPOSURE AND IT'S A GOOD THING THAT THEY HAVE MORE CONTACT WITH OTHER PEOPLE! dr. karn won't have a romantic interest i don't think, but god's forbid if either first or khaotung ever get paired up with a woman (like most bl men already were like earth, tay, new, gun, off, sea, jimmy, joong, dunk, and basically everyone else), because i've never seen a fandom that likes to fragilize a relationship that has proved to be anything but fragile like some soms do.

from what they've allowed us to see, first seems like one of the most genuine and caring people ever. we can't never put our hands on fire for celebrities bc they only let us see what they want us to see, but when you have two people who are highly praised not only professionally but also personally by pretty much every one of their colleagues and bosses, you can at least get an idea of to base yourself on. i'm not saying that first might not have felt insecure about it, but i think it's disrespectful to think that we know better than them of how to navigate this situation. what benefit would it bring to them, if they were actually beefing to bring this up with media and fans?

i'm not disregarding first's feelings, i must also add. we know he wants recognition and wants to be known, that's why he's in the industry, and i hope he gets nominations as kant this year bc he deserves it so much (still baffled that he didn't get anything with akk. it is one of his most impressive performances in my opinion), but i'll say it again, they only started joking about this matter bc fans made a fuss about this first. they are just leaning on the joke and the media keeps asking about it and he keeps reassuring it is a joke but he still jokes, because people love talking about it. he wouldn't be doing that if fans didn't bring it up and p'leo commented about it on the lol press tour and they were forced to address that. joong and dunk, being gremlins and chaos bringers as they are encouraged them to lean on that pretended-jealousy thing bc that's what they do themselves. they play with the circunstancies fans create (joongdunk have the advantage here bc differently from fk who usually don't address when fans are being ridiculous, joong calls them out tho).

i find it funny that, if you're a fk fan, you must know one of the things that brought them fans in the first place besides their acting ability and chemistry is the fact that they have a extremely close and meaningful relationship (besides the intensive ghost shipping project they were on before becoming an actual pair with the ig lives and brand collaborations and despite khaotung being paired up with podd at the time, first always lurking in the corner). but people are so easy to flip and turn their actions and words into something else. for a couple you're always praising for having a close bond (we call them soulmates, don't we?), some people really think their relationship is extremely fragile to not be able to endure.

[litnerdwrites]

About the dancing chapter...

I agree 100% with this comment by the amazing @deathbealady (no seriously, I didn't even realise how similar this situation was to Mor's) and I wanted to use it as a jumping off point to talk about Eris Vansera. To be clear though, I like fanon Eris and am currently undecided about canon Eris, for reasons I'll explain later.

For now, we can start with the IC asking Nesta to try and seduce Eris. I refuse to believe they weren't given this idea by Elain, either because she volunteered Nesta outright, or because she put the idea of using Nesta's artistic passions that, at this point, they know were effectively weaponised by her mother, to seduce an older male with the idea of marriage.

Either way, the fact that the IC knew what Nesta's mother had done, and decided to take advantage of it without ever asking what she thought of it, or what she might like, despite it being the same thing done to Mor when she was Nesta's age, if not younger. It's made especially worse given that Nesta likely feels unable say 'no' to the IC, because if she does, she'd likely be threatened with Elain being made to do it.

If that isn't bad enough, and I wouldn't be sure if it could get worse if I wasn't about to tell you why, then we can take a look at the age gap between Eris and Nesta. I've heard people argue that it's fine, since they're both consenting adults, but I think that the term 'adults' needs to be redefined. Humans are considered adults at the age of 18 or so, but only have a fully developed frontal love at 25. Meanwhile, fae are considered adults by the age of about 50 to 80 (with the latter being the age that a High Lord can be named such, but some people say it's 50). This has some pretty serious implications.

Starting with the fact that if females in Illyria and the CON are married off/wings clipped when they have their first period, which seems to be from around the same time human women have theirs, to 18 if they try to prevent it through medication, then they aren't adults themselves. They aren't even half way there in the (I don't want to say mild, best case, better or anything like that case because it's all messed up) cases where the woman is 18 or so. It also implies that a fae female's frontal lobe isn't developed until she's over fifty, since we don't have evidence to suggest the contrary.

Just because Nesta was almost 25 when she became fae doesn't make it alright either. Given that her aging must have slowed astronomically when she was turned, it's fair to assume it would have a huge impact on maturity and brain development. Which means the Archeron sister's in general might have serious gaps in the way their brains develop, especially Feyre, since she was resurrected and her body changed. It might even be slightly different for Nesta and Elain since they were killed, pulled apart and put back together in the cauldron.

Since it was the cauldron, there's a chance that their brains were also changed to be like fae, but either way, both possibilities and scenarios come back to the same answer: The Archeron Sisters are still mentally children, and will likely remain so for several decades longer, perhaps even longer than regular fae due to the unprecedented and irregular nature of their existence.

This brings me back to the subject of Nesta and Eris. He is a grown adult many centuries older than Nesta, with frontal lobe development and centuries of experience. Nesta is barely even half way to being an adult, while he is over 500. Moreover, the IC believe that Eris is a monster.

Now, I'm well aware that there's likely more to the issues between Eris and Mor than what we've seen. Between Eris's own words regarding 'circumstances' that he wouldn't explain, to the narrative going out of his way to show us good parts of him. Such as the way he moved to protect his mother at the HL meeting, and how he let his own father torture him but still protected the IC's secrets and took the unnecessary verbal abuse from Cassian. There's even the fact that Eris simply lets others believe him to be the villain, and let's Mor control the narrative for her own comfort, as opposed to spilling whatever happened, even if it would, somehow, absolve him.

Now, to be perfectly clear, there is little Eris could say that would absolve him, truly, of what happened. I acknowledge that he's a victim of his father, however that doesn't mean he can't also be Morrigan's abuser. And yes, even if he didn't touch her, neglect is abuse. Leaving her there for dead, regardless of the reasons, is a messed up thing to do. The categories of victim and abuser are not mutually exclusive.

The narrative wants us, as readers, to question Eri's actions and begin to wonder what happened between him and Lucien and Mor. It wants us to open up to the idea that Eris may not be as bad as he's made out to be, and that there's something more sinister happening, since it puts some level of suspicion on Lucien, Mor and Beron. However, just because that's the story we're being fed as readers, doesn't mean that the characters have the same perspective, or are living the same story, necessarily.

If you think about it, they have no reason to believe that Eris isn't a psycho who abuses woman and would slaughter his brothers to get to the crown. His comment about circumstances does read like an abuser trying to justify his actions with little effort, while giving no real reason, not that one would make up for what the IC believes he did. It's not a good enough reason to absolve him or make him seem like a good person.

He still hunted Feyre down, even though he had no reason to once she and Lucien made it to the Winter Court, and it, logically, would've caused more trouble for Beron if they were caught. Especially since a whole fire fight took place, and it would be easy for Kallias to connect that with autumn citizens, since he didn't know about Feyre's magic. If anything, hunting them at that point would've caused more problems and they'd be better off just telling Beron that Feyre and Lucien were there. A high lady, if Beron acknowledges the title or not, trespassing in foreign lands with a banished son would be enough to raise a fuss about.

He, also, has people who've known him for centuries, from Mor to Lucien (though the latter probably has more accurate info given his connections in various courts, and the fact it's unlikely Mor shared many words with him over 5 centuries) and the fact he's essentially blackmailing the Nc. This is more so an issue of his having certain pieces of information being a cause for the IC to fear what he may do with it, or what might be found out by their enemies if they use torture or a daemati.

I'm not saying, by any means, that I hate him. I think he's actually written better than Rhysand at this point, since unlike Rhysie playing hero, Eris knows he's a terrible person and low key owns it. Whether or not that's subject to change is dependant of SJM's writing in the future. There's a chance she may actually turn him into Rhys 2.0 by pretended he was a good guy all along.

However, regardless of his reasons, he has done so many atrocious things that the IC have no reason to think he's a descent person. Mor clearly hasn't said anything about what happened and, as much as I don't like her, she has no on page motive to antagonise Eris otherwise. That might change later, especially if she's the traitor, but as of now, her behaviour seems understandable, somewhat, based on the version of events that she gives.

Yet, despite all of this, the IC still think that essentially whoring Nesta out to Eris because it suits their goals. Regardless of the risks to Nesta's safety, regardless of how Nesta feels about the matter and and simply going off of Feyre's guesses about how Nesta feels without ever feeling the need to confirm if any of them are accurate to Nesta.

Let me summarise: Rhysand and Feyre, Nesta's own sister, thought it was a good idea to use Nesta's artistic passions to seduce a man that is literally 20 times Nesta's age, letting said man ask for Nesta's hand, and letting Nesta consider accepting despite the IC believing he is a woman torturing psycho that would throw her to the wolves at the first chance if it helped him in the end.

Let's not forget that while Eris may be bit of a grey area for us at the moment, the IC knows that Eris also lives with abusers, like Beron, who'd have no issue using physical violence against Nesta. So even if they thought Eris wasn't a monster for some reason, they'd still be putting Nesta in danger. Especially if Beron is working with the Death God, who wants the trove and is using Bryallin to find it.

Oh, and this was all after Cassian came to the conclusion that Nesta was suicidal, and was sexually assaulted in a vision, if I remember right, while on a life threatening mission in a place the rest of the IC, even Amren, is scared of.

Regardless of what Rhysand says, he allows abusers near enough to his family, or the ones he doesn't care as much about, I suppose, and is seemingly willing to let them marry said abusers if it gets him his goal. Rhysand who was abused. Rhysand who's mother was forced into child marriage.

Rhysand who seems to ignore the fact that the Archeron sisters are children. Children can't consent, if it wasn't clear enough to him already. Also, consent must be informed, and last I checked, Nesta wasn't informed about Eris beyond him being a snake. She isn't given a heads up about how abusive he's believed to be, how he may have to kill/watch you die if his dad decides so, or how he's likely to leave you bleeding out in the woods if you're injured. This is literally what the IC believe he is like and they didn't tell her.

Consent needs to be voluntary. I think it's been well established that Nesta likely doesn't feel like she can make real decisions because of consequences she may face.

He's also completely willing to send a suicidal (you can't argue that he doesn't know since Cassian reports everything to Rhysand, and kind of Feyre, apparently, from her Valkyries to her progress in 'healing'/being brainwashed so there's no reason he wouldn't report that too) into life threatening situations, put them in a place where they could jump to their deaths at any moment, with magic that could provide literally anything but alcohol, and filled with weapons.

To conclude, Eris is a grey area in ACOTAR that, at this point, reads as what Rhysand kind of should've been if SJM didn't make him a good guy for no reason. Meanwhile, this 'good guy' is endangering his sister in law through abuse, emotional blackmail and brainwashing, while putting her in proximity with a known abuser. Might I remind you that she's a minor? With possible developmental gaps. And he's doing it all because her being in danger makes his life easier, and the cousin that the dude abused is going along with this without any issue.

[thalfbloodloser]

You bring insanity to a boringly sane fandom. I would like to hear your latest thought on ivorycest... Whatever nugget you may be nursing. If that is alright

✦ aw, thank you! you're so sweet 🐌🧡 it's very much alright - no one in here ever sends me fun stuff anymore. your ask was a breath of fresh air, anon! truth be told, i haven't been thinking about ivorycest all that much, but get ready for a HUGE text-block jumpscare because you just gave me the perfect excuse to write about them ➜

✦ sometimes it pains me to see so many folks avoiding ivorycest like the plague, because, like ranfren itself, it's so unapologetically insane that you can't really hate it. even if you try. if you have a dash of sense of humor, you'll see it's hilariously canon compliant!

i've seen lots of people argue that "anything romantic/sexual between randal and luther would be inherently out of character", which i'll admit is a reasonable concern, but it's just not true. the issue is characterization: people keep projecting human-based tropes and behavior on cryptids, and that's where the knee-jerk "eugh" reaction comes from. because yeah, randal and luther aren't going to declare their Forbidden Love for each other and then passionately kiss under the moonlit sky, nor are they going to feel guilty about their attraction and part ways with a tearful "we can't! this is wrong!". it would be completely unnatural behavior for them. all that? made for humans. and pretty basic humans, at that. for ivorycest to work, both in and out of canon, you gotta fully embrace the weirdness, see beyond humanity and forget all old expectations you might've gotten from any other couple of siblings!

from my point of view, it doesn't even feel like it fits with the rest of the "-cest"s. and not because of the possibility that randal and luther aren't even biologically related (i seriously doubt they're even from the same species) - we all know that adoptive siblings aren't any less siblings just because they don't share DNA. plus, pseudo-incest is still a thing - but because they're so, so far from human nature and from other brother/brother ships that it's almost laughable, and sometimes genuinely puzzling, to apply ANY human labels to them at all. for example, would you call luther a cannibal because he eats people? no. because it'd be like calling a human cannibal for eating cows, and that makes no sense. words mean things.

to us, at least.

coincidentally, that's half of my point.

the ivorys adress each other as "brother", sure, but you cannot look me in the eyes and tell me that they fully understand what that means or that they care about it enough to follow the moral/ethical guidelines attached to such terms. you simply cannot. most times it feels less like they see each other as family and more like they're just...roleplaying.

but if you decide to call someone "daddy", just when does that make them your father?

randal, who could (but perhaps shouldn't) be considered the most resourceful of the two, uses "brother" as both title and honorific - like one uses "sir" or "ma'am" - but doesn't seem to be overtly attached to the familial aspect of it. again, he's not a human, and, as far as we know, our siblinghood doesn't come naturally to him - much like pain, guilt, conscience and a whole load of bodily functions that he also seems to lack. luther, on the other same hand, understands the caretaking implications of being the "older brother", but that's pretty much where his brotherly-ness begins and ends. if anything, he's incorrectly using the sibling label while playing parent; just without any trauma and/or responsibility attached to it. there's also the fact that he's the most powerful entity in the household and randal - no matter how many pianos he "possesses" or how many times he shoves himself in the space between the wall and the fridge - cannot possibly overpower him, also adds to this parent/kid dynamic; hence granting luther the (almost-meaningless) title of "master" and the authority over their dysfunctional home. that still doesn't mean randal perceives him as anything but a housemate, or playdate, for he doesn't really seem to keep up the role of mischievous little brother unless he's bored (often, not always).

so they use the word, but it lacks permanent meaning. in that sense, classic incest tropes - no matter if brocon or dadson flavored - don't really work. there's power imbalance, sure, but the familial bonds needed to reinforce that imbalance simply do not exist. randal is babied because he likes to be. he likes being taken care of and likes having rules to break. it's a character he plays. luther "takes care" of him because he himself likes doing it. he likes being a parent and likes having a reason to lecture & discipline. it's a character he plays. they don't actually need this dynamic to thrive, and it wasn't imposed on them by parents/caretakers or any set of misfortunes that we know of. they just deliberately chose to partake on it.

consequently, i don't think they feel what humans perceive as familial love (healthy or unhealthy) for each other. they're simply two powerful entities - whom we can assume have been at least friends for a long time - playing make-believe. creatures who have little to no regard for humanity as a species, and are only interested in their own antics. of course they do eventually commend certain humans for their achievements, and seem to find all sorts of comfort in our art/creations/traditions, but outside of that? they see humans as fragile beings as intelectually insignificant to them as most animals are to us. randal forcibly keeps one as a pet. not far from "master" luther, who keeps two.

again, the ivorys are clearly intelligent, specially regarding their own survival. they're not behind being purposefully dense when it comes to anything human that is even slightly inconvenient to them (huh? eating the delivery man's arm when we order pizza is bad? haha, i would never have guessed!). they have the means and understanding necessary to behave (and perhaps look) 100% human, they just...choose not to. they can bend reality itself to their whims, turn themselves and others into inconceivable creatures, all while feigning absolute normalcy at the chaotic world around them (werewoofs, carpet cats with human faces, alive walls and furniture...), and you think they'd draw the line at willingly distorting something as frivolous as family hierarchy?

tch. please.

with that said, by the rules of their own game, if they were to partake in any...non-platonic activities, it would only be considered incestuous because they decided it would be - by creating the dynamic and environment in the first place. and they would simply not fucking care if it is upsetting, distasteful or imoral by human standards. and that's the ship's whole flavor - that's why i love it so much! precisely because there's no such thing as the "oh, no! i accidentally fell in love with my sibling! woe is me!" (which i also love) with the ivorys. there's also not a "normal" way to ship them, even if you're adamant about them not being related or not seeing each other as family, because they're two fucking weirdos.

their whole relationship is so tastefully bonkers that i genuinely wouldn't be fazed if they spawned another creature to be their "littlest" sibling. honestly, who could stop them? and who's to say that, in their cryptic way, they're not a married couple? or buddies into weird roleplay? ultimately, it is undeniable that they - in at least one sense of the word - love each other enough to enable each other; and to indulge on each other's silly/straight-up-criminal fantasies.

to me, there's no (human) romance, nor seduction, involved. randal knows he'll get nothing by jumping on his brother's lap and performing the most disgustingly horny hentai rip-off scenario ever. much like he'll get nothing in exchange for sweet words, flowers and chocolate. it's part of the game. he knows he'll receive only a "<3" (♥︎) - which him and luther seem to be able to pronounce out loud - or a hummed, blank-faced lecture about needing either a nap or to drink more water. if luther is having a bad day, he might even receive some sort of punishment. and those are the reactions randal wants, the normalcy (if you can call it that) he counts on. if he wanted a different response, something genuinely human, he'd have forcibly gauged it off sebastian, nyon or even nyen. likewise, luther knows better than to come too close or to grab randal by the waist, lest he get bitten or not-so-playfully snipped with scissors.

but there's intimacy. so much intimacy. on waking up to the other's figure looming over them, on physically crawling under each other's skin, on wrapping hands and claws around each other's organs and muscles and bones, on faux eyes staring into faux eyes, on a eerie smile pressed against unmoving lips, on the suspension of disbelief, on the lingering smell of copper, on the flashing lights and sappy endearments and and-

and, i suppose, on the sex too. i don't think i can picture them having human sex - really, who am i to guess what these creatures are packing in their pants? for all we know, they might as well be ken-doll smooth down there - but if they were to ever consummate their relationship sexually, i feel like it would probably be as uncomfortable, off-putting, disturbing and offensive to the eyes as everything else they do. genuinely revolting from any possible point of view - unless you're a true monsterfucker. a ritual so gross that, for us, it resembles nothing but a cacophony of unthinkable horrors molding together wetly, but that, to them, feels nothing but heavenly from beginning to end. as close to divinity as such wretched demons/creatures are ever going to get.

anyways. enough, my apologies-

the conclusion is that...me shipping these two isn't even about wishing they'd get together, because, in their fucked up way, they already are. it isn't about spiting other fans either. it's about having fun coming up with increasingly nonsensical scenarios hoping to come close to their freak ✦

[rahuratna]

🛑 The free pass for Rants and Musings has reached you 🛑

If there is anything you’d like to rant or talk about, but no one’s ever asked you about it, consider this the ask you need to yap about it as much as you want! Have fun ✨

Hmm, musings. I want to expand a little on why Nanami's character speaks to me on such a personal level.

It all comes down to this idea: You are not your job.

This is a concept I've struggled with for a long time. I've always wondered why it was so damnably difficult for me to maintain a work-life balance. I am not the kind of person who can detach from work when I come home. I will think of my day, of the things I could have done better. I will fixate on small issues and blow them out of proportion in my mind, issues that nobody else has even taken that seriously.

A lot of this has to do with the need for perfection. The need for acknowledgement. The need to know that what I've done is both academically and morally right.

And this is why I feel such tenderness for characters like Nanami, and they way they're portrayed in media. I want to write the undercurrents of their lives, the little comforts they have, the stimulus that brings out their true passion, the traits that make them so human to us as readers/viewers.

Nanami severely undervalued himself, especially in a personal capacity. He states that due to the nature of his work as a salaryman, nobody will miss him if he disappears. This single statement made him a very compelling character for me.

How many of us feel this way? How many of us actually define ourselves by what we can do for others? By our relationships? By our jobs?

The fact that Nanami was never able to manifest a domain expansion speaks volumes to me. The expansion of the innate domain seems to be an ultimate expression of self identity; the stronger the sorcerer's sense of self-awareness and acceptance, the more 'refined' the domain. Mahito's manifestation of a domain expansion for the first time is evidence enough of this.

Nanami does not, through various things he's mentioned and done, have this strong sense of self, or self preservation for that matter. He measures the value of his life in terms of how much he can help others. He defines himself within the confines of his work as a salaryman, then as a sorcerer.

I like writing him as a character because I've learned, through hard experience, why it is so important to value yourself as a human being, above all else. How the thing you may perceive to be selfish is actually a healthy relationship with your own identity.

If all works of fiction can be interconnected through the people who enjoy and appreciate them, then I'd like to write little fictional accounts that breathe some extra dimensionality into these characters we know and love. I'd like to send a little whisper into the void, in my own way, letting anyone who feels the same know that it's fine to be kind to yourself. It's fine to be soft with yourself.

You are not your job. You are not defined by your value to others. You are a thinking, feeling human being and your existence does not need to be justified or measured by some arbitrary scale invented by someone else. To live is to be free. 

[haleigh-sloth]

Isagi being an asshole and putting those insane guys in their places is like one of the best things abt his caracter lmao hes a jerk to anyone that seems even more of a jerk than he could ever be

Dude I'm fucking saying!!!!

Like I said, when Isagi walks up to Hiori unprompted and is a total dick then yeah point made, but up until now every asshole moment has just been returned from previous bouts he's had with said character who was being a dick first. Yukimiya prime example, I seriously did not like him for the first three quarters of this arc lol. But he and Isagi worked it out and also? Isagi threw him compliments specifically for being assertive and going for his own goal leaving Isagi in the dust. Come on.

Loki?? You can't just insult an entire country's worth and expect nobody to say shit back to you. Isagi should have drop kicked him on live TV. He went easy on him.

Noa--we'll see the repercussions on this. There may be some issues or maybe since Isagi proved Noa wrong there may not be. Idk. Though I struggle to say a 17 year old can be an asshole to a grown ass man, more like a mouthy brat LOL. I don't think Noa is a good guy, in fact I'm fairly convinced that he is very much not. By good guy I mean "good guy" in terms of his role in the story. Like is he someone we should trust and be content with or be weary of, I very much feel the latter. Noa and Loki are god awful coaches/mentors and the way they're drawn kind of hints at that. Someone should tell them off anyway. But we'll see what the consequence of doing that is LOL. But again! Not entirely unjustified, even Kaiser told Noa he's really shitty (and he is).

Isagi getting mad at Kunigami was not something that lasted long. Kunigami was ALSO sabotaging Isagi at times...lol. Isagi telling him to enjoy his scraps didn't come from nowhere, Kunigami has changed and his story is about to tell us why. But later Isagi told him they'll eat steak together again (meaning he believes in him!) and called him a hero a chapter ago. I think they'll be fine. Also not example of Isagi being a POS.

Isagi is excused from literally anything he does to Kaiser and Rin. I'm sorry but anything he does is justified. He could slash their tires and I'd say yeah that's fine. If he pulled out a gun I'd say okay go for it LOL/j. This one is the most baffling to me because we KNOW as an audience that Rin and Kaiser are taking their problems out on Isagi, we literally KNOW THIS so why is Isagi the one catching heat in this arc. What's ironic is that they're targeting him because they think so highly of him. But he doesn't know this, all he's seeing is Rin and Kaiser having melt downs on the field (second time for Rin lmao..) and seeing them get up in HIS FACE SPECIFICALLY nonstop, his own teammate constantly sabotaging him, Rin being nuts (picking him up by the scruff of his neck lmao...what a freak), and both of them just being generally weird about him. From an outside POV this has to look fucking crazy. I actually think it'd be very WEIRD if Isagi was stagnant and not written to have any sort of reaction to all of this?? Like yeah he should probably adapt so he doesn't get swallowed up and defeated big time. I'm wondering what people wanted here because it'd be odd and out of place for him to just not shift his behavior at all during this arc. It would also be boring.

I really think shounen protags that are not Naruto/Deku-esque scare people or something. I believe there is a spectrum in Blue Lock between being completely individualist (self-serving your own ego at all costs) and being too collective (not asserting yourself, fading into the background) and the goal of blue lock is finding the happy medium along that spectrum. Isagi used to fade into the background. He doesn't anymore, and he didn't have to act like Kaiser to make his way to the top. Kaiser is the opposite end of the spectrum and look how that turned out. Everyone's stories kind of follow this pattern too, esp with all the mini arcs about fighting codependency and getting rid of fixating on people and relying on people to make you happy (Bachira, Rin, Isagi, Nagi, Reo). Isagi has had some moments where he went too far to the individualist end, but he stays in the middle and that's why everyone around him is saying he's inspired them to keep going.

Also....these isolated incidents of "asshole" are like....very very spread out throughout this arc. They are so spread out that it feels silly to say this is a consistent CHANGE to his overall personality. If they all started happening in the PXG match then it'd be something to ponder but they all 1) happened at different times, spread out from each other showing this comes with an antecedent 2) all happened as a result of someone else being a dick first and 3) did not last long and all characters moved on from it rather quickly, and nobody made excessive comments or worried about it.

When the entire surrounding cast starts commenting on how he's a dick I'll start to believe it, but I'm seeing the opposite right now??

[nabi-unveiled]

I was so intrigued by the banner for Make Up With Mud that I didn't even bother reading the description before starting episode 1.

I have a love/hate relationship with make-up. I LOVE how make-up looks and how I feel when wearing it, but I often dislike the actual feel of make-up itself and the commentary it invites. I'm very slow at putting it on. That's time that could go to other things. Most of the time, it doesn't feel worth it to me. I tend to save it for Halloween or special events. I absolutely love shows that get into makeup or fashion though.

We start with our lead discussing how "the me with makeup on is filthy". I'm immediately having When It Rains swamp flashbacks. This feels like it's going to explore personal desires and identity. I'm always here for that. Plus, that shot is a vibe.

The boyfriend is a controlling bastard complete with villain music. The music is so on the nose that it's comical to me. Not subtle at all. We're not even going to try to pretend this man is good. Got it. I'm not even sure I'd count her lipstick as red in this scene (which was apparently the issue).

Enter our...second lead? Maybe. It's at this point that I know I will be watching this show until the end no matter what crimes it commits. This is Princess Jellyfish vibes. That's pure nostalgia for me. I learned so much about myself watching that show/reading that manga.

However, I also have no idea how I'm going to tag this post to get it to the right people. Hmm. 🤔 Anyways, is Eve (our crossdresser) a romantic second lead? It's definitely possible given this info. This could also turn out to be a self-love story though.

Our meek mouse lead inadvertently asks for a makeup lesson from Eve. And, I mean....I get what they're going for in terms of message. But ideally it would be both. For example, there are a lot of clothes I absolutely love that I wouldn't wear. They don't suit my body or my lifestyle. I do appreciate the thought though.

Oof. That feels personal for me. It's not so much that I "worry" about it, but I do get why our meek mouse cares.

Nope. Villain music already told us that isn't going to happen. A girl can dream though, right?

Yeah, me too. This show hasn't been exactly A grade on the production/technical side so I appreciate the glowy haze here to depict her happiness.

But yeah, knew he wasn't going to like it. Our meek mouse feels instantly defeated. I feel for her. I know that feeling. It was over a dress, not make-up - but the principal is the same. It sucks when your partner rains on your parade.

Seriously? I didn't mean literal rain! The show really isn't making ANY effort for us to like or understand this man. He's a paper-thin caricature of a manipulator at this point. Coming off of Fujisawa in When It Rains and Jae-min in Secret Relationships, this guy is laughable. He's so obvious that the only reason our lead is staying is that she's a true meek mouse character. Also paper-thin. For the record, I don't mind meek mice characters. I think there's space for all types in dramaland.

Yeah, there's no subtlety here. Which...ehh. I do prefer my villains a little more nuanced.

He's exhibiting classic abuser signals, but our meek mouse is swayed. He says he'll marry her after all. He's a lawyer. It's everything society says she should want in life.

We're hammering in on the "purity" vs. personal desires theme. It's very to the point. Villain music is extremely obvious.

But I am still vibing, because ....

Eve is amazing. Or at least Eve's fit is amazing 😍.

Eve's getting passionate and spitting out facts.

Have I mentioned how much I love this fit? This sweater tank top alone is enough to make me watch this show.

I love Eve. Everyone needs an Eve in their life. Man is speaking facts. That said....this dialogue has NO nuance. It's not giving me anything to dig into, because it's so obvious. Unless I wanted to self-reflect, but that's dangerous territory. 😬

Eve invites our lead (Miku) to the flea market where they'll be running a booth.

Miku invites our paper villain, but he declines. Not shocking. He also instructs Miku to not go and just stay home. Also not shocking.

At least our meek mouse is recognizing her feelings to some degree.

Which is probably why she goes to the flea market. Even a meek mouse has moments of disobedience. Especially if their desires are being consistently ignored.

Eve serves in another great fit. I LOVE their earrings.

Eve is taking meek mouse to explore the world of style. Trying to decide if Eve has ulterior motives 😘. Seems very likely given the narrative and music cues. Eve is the only character so far that may have hidden depths.

Meek Mouse, I understand. Well, for me it's self-denial rather than self-deprecation. But still ... trouble is a hassle. That said - your man is no bueno. This might be the first line in the show that I think has some analysis value. It's a "habit" and bad habits are hard to break.

Yep. Eve appreciates good sweaters.

And look who decided to show up to the flea market. Paper villain isn't pleased with his meek mouse, and he's storming off to see Eve. The music and editing just makes me laugh 😂. It's so very direct.

At the end of episode 1, I'm vibing. It's a bit too direct and over the head with all of its themes so far. But, I'll forgive everything for Eve at this point.

This was a fun lunch break distraction if nothing else.

[ckret2]

What is the equivalent of the phrase "Oh my God" that Bill uses? Is he mentioning some god figure from his home dimension or is he using “Oh my me” or “Oh my Axolotl”?

He doesn't use anything.

Have you ever heard an atheist say "oh my big bang" instead of "oh my god"? In common usage, the word "god" in "oh my god" is merely part of a stock phrase and not a declaration of belief. In fact, changing "god" to another term would instantly make it more religious, since if you just say "oh my god" it's like "well maybe they believe in a god or maybe they're just using the phrase," but if you say "oh my [something else]" it's like "they DEFINITELY believe in [something else] so passionately that they changed the phrase just to emphasize how much they believe in it."

If Bill ever used the phrase, he would use it like a foreign word pronounced omaigohd that's just an exclamation that communicates a specific emotional meaning to English-speakers (anger, shock, excitement)—and he's not going to get all cutesy while speaking a foreign language to draw attention to something irrelevant. This exclamation isn't an avenue to announce his religious beliefs.

There ARE issues he feels passionately enough about that he'd break away from common English. Unless he's in "pretending to be human" mode, at any place where a human would naturally refer to themself as "a person," "a woman/man," "female/male," "she/he," Bill will refer to himself as "a shape," "a triangle," "triangular," "it," even in contexts where that sounds weird to the humans. His gender is triangle and that matters to him. Religion does not.

At any rate, there's no [something else] he could fill into the phrase. He knows for a fact that there are figures powerful enough to alter reality—he is one. He suspects on good evidence that there are even more powerful figures that can conjure an entire universe from nothing—he is not one. He considers "power" and "divinity" to be separate things, he doesn't think powerful figures are divine, and he doesn't think the divine is real. He thinks "god" is an artificial social label, like "king," that only exists when enough people concur that it's real and stops existing when enough people stop respecting it. He thinks "god" is what the weak call the powerful when they've been fooled into thinking the powerful deserve worship. He thinks he's one of the powerful that fools the weak. He doesn't think he's a god—except when he's lying to himself very well—but he loves how it feels when other people call him a god, so he encourages it. He doesn't consider anybody god, he doesn't obey or respect any authority, and generally the more powerful a being is, the more he dislikes them on principle. One trillion years ago, the beliefs he was raised with were the sort a white American boomer experiencing a religious crisis would insist are "spiritual but not religious." He briefly thought gods might be real in his youth, but never worshiped any.

But all that aside—his vocabulary simply doesn't include the phrase "oh my god." He doesn't want to imply he even might worship something—he's too proud and that pride is too fragile. If he has to make an exclamation, it'll be something entirely different—"Oh boy." "Oh, come on!" "You're kidding me." "Seriously?" "Whoa!" "Wow!" "No way," maybe hysterical laughter—whatever's fitting in a given situation. Several times in the fic I've had to go find a different phrase where if he was another character I could've just put "omigosh".

[sirensoul-min]

Rose's fans acting as if she greater than bts because of APT is so funny though like that's crazy. Rose can't even be compared to jimin in terms of talent. they need to be humbled rn

(okay apologies this will be a long, winded response i have no time to edit and proofread, lol).

are people seriously doing that??💀 listen i have no huge issue with rosé simply because i'm not a fan of hers and her group (never was), but not for lack of trying. i gave myself a chance to like them before as i was curious because many of my IRLs were fans of theirs (i was originally from a country that favours girlgroups more than boygroups).

that being said, i believe rosé has her talents. i know comparing her to my bias who happens to be a man would be perceived by some as misogynistic, but i'm going to hold their hands when i say that this has nothing to do with their genders. i'm biased yes but come on, if rosé can perform and sing the way jimin did and could, then by all means i can be her fan, but no, she can't. and that's okay.

however, claiming that she's as big as bts and or jimin just because of the success of apt is unhinged. yes it was a catchy song, has bruno mars in it (a huge western artist who practically has all his songs a hit), and has an all-out promo. it had little chance of performing poorly.

meanwhile, bts was able to start and rise above with their own korean songs with no big western collabs. bts started a revolution, a cultural reset, they made many people (an understatement) to love kpop again.

and don't even get me started on jimin. he was able to put out beautiful music and performances all on his own and even while serving in the military and even with underwhelming promotions from his incompetent label. how can we even compare them? it's unfair (and frankly insulting) to compare jimin's success because of rosé and bruno's song because again, my man relies on no one but himself and his team---no big western collab, no autoplay, and certainly no massive playlisting and radio. jimin is also a versatile artist and has a wide range. he was and still is in the barracks while Who and Muse were released. jimin is a 'one-man army' (i read this term somewhere and i loved it) and was able to release hits without his personal presence. i don't even need to say all this because come on, these are just facts and they can speak for themselves.

her fans need to chill because they'll only get more hate. i get they're happy for her but do be boastful when the success of that song translates to her actual solo songs, which as far as i know isn't happening? like isn't that such a waste and sad to think that the "gp" isn't interested with her solo songs but only with apt? even her stans seem to not give a damn about her solo songs because those streams are just...low. if this is how it's going to be then i guess she really do need to stick with bangpd's fame formula and do purely western collabs from now on. solo songs better stay in the vault forever. (also isn't it ironic how bangpd and scooter went through all that for jk's album only for apt to be objectively more popular than seven?)

at the end of the day, i can't and won't be controlling what music other people enjoy. it's a matter of personal preference, after all. i can surely judge people for it, though.

a song can be catchy and all, but i can also view it as practically disposable. apt is like that for me because it's not something that i would listen to over and over again (i only ever hear it because of my IRLs). it's the same way that i treat my least fave songs from bts and jimin---i repeat some of their songs more often than the others.

there's no problem with being proud for your fave, but don't go lie to yourselves and everyone else. not everyone is as purposely naïve here as some of them.

[dotthings]

6.14 isn't among the strongest S6 eps but it sure does have some meat on it concerning unreliable narrators with Dean and his self-perception. Shoutout back to the "truth" he spoke to Veritas, which was *a* truth, because Dean believed it, but it wasn't The Truth, it drew from his fears and perceptions about himself, when he said he's nothing but a killer.

In 6.14 after Sam collapses from hell memories, Dean tries to give him advice about why he shouldn't explore his Soulless Sam past any further, because it is dangerous for Sam due to the memory wall protecting him. Which, Dean has a point. When Sam asks how to deal with it, then, Dean says "you shove it down and let it come out in spurts of violence and alcoholism."

Dean is expressive on a regular basis and doesn't shove stuff down nearly as hard as Dean would like to pretend he does. But there are also grains of truth--we've seen Dean use alcohol as a coping mechanism and we've seen him bottle things for a time and then do tearful confessions or outbursts of grief or fear or anger.

Dean's self-perception tells him he's nothing but a repressed, alcoholic mess, but he's not in fact repressed since he is loud about his feelings at almost all times, while he tries to "shove it down" but he's just so bad at it.

The scene between Dean and Ben!! The walking talking heartache that is Dean Winchester!!

"I think my job turns me into somebody who can't sit at your dinner table. And if I stayed, you'd end up just like me" "Why do you say it like you're so bad?"

"Trust me, I'm not someone you wanna aim to be."

Dean cannot see himself through Ben's eyes. And yet again, this isn't actually some deep core Truth, it's *a* truth because this is how Dean sees it and how he sees himself inherently. If he'd spoken about the dangers of his life and why that concerns him if monsters came home and put his loved ones at risk, that wouldn't be unreliable narrator and about Dean's self perception, those are real issues Dean and Lisa would have to seriously consider if they continued a long-term relationship while Dean hunts. But he doesn't say that. He says what he says. Like he's tainted. Like he's bad. Like he could ruin the Braedens just by being around. Nothing but a killer. Unfit to be with them.

He loves them and they love him, even if Dean/Lisa isn't an epic romance, they still care for each other as people, and Dean and Ben formed a bond, Ben is one of several kids over the course of the series Dean takes on a paternal role with, willingly and lovingly.

Ben is a perceptive, sensitive kid who cares a lot about Dean and he's not having with it.

"You're a liar, Dean."

"Excuse me?"

"You say family's important. But what do you call people who care for you, who love you even when you're a dick? You know you're walking out on your family, right?"

He's a kid so he doesn't understand completely, and he's hurt by Dean leaving. So he is lashing out. But he is perceptive in understanding that what Dean's saying doesn't add up.

Whatever people ship or don't. One of spn's biggest themes is about family and the different ways family forms. The reason Lisa and Ben matter isn't because it's suburbia and "the apple pie life" it's because they became like family for Dean and he loves them. And the reason he loses them from his life isn't actually hunting, it's his self-perception issues, it's his perception that he can't have that and doesn't deserve them, that they're so much better off without him. He sells that narrative to himself and everything spirals from that.

Yes there are dangers to Dean's life, and he and the Braedens would have to have serious talks about it. But isn't it interesting, the rigid thinking involved to dismiss the Braedens as impossible, "oh, the Braedens can't stick around and they can't be family, this is all fake, Dean doesn't love them, he doesn't want any of this." He actually does. He wants to hunt but he also wants the connection he had with the Braedens. Both things can be true and I really appreciate S6 showing it's all part of Dean, it's sincere and real and part of who he is. It's not that he doesn't want to hunt. Hunting also makes him miserable, it's traumatic, Dean has said throughout the series, since early seasons, how traumatic it is, and how miserable, he also wants to hunt, both things can be true.

But it's not a simple binary where hunting is all he wants, hunting is all he needs, where there is no tragedy or sadness in Dean's yearning for other things and his perception that he can't have it and isn't worthy of anything outside of the hunt, the kill.

At the end of the episode as Sam and Dean commiserate, Dean says "all we do is make a mess." *cries in Dean Winchester*

[thebuggiest]

Partner is playing Silent Hill 2, and we started talking about how the TF2 characters would do there.

@unokins

-Scout is having the worst time. Yeah, he can outrun most of the monsters, but the physical manifestations of his daddy issues are not something he is mentally equipped to handle. Also he's a coward lol

-Spy is similarly not doing great. He takes matters of the heart very seriously, and having to think through past regrets, doubts, and loves is going to wreak havoc on his psyche. Also similarly to Scout, there's only so much avoiding these problems and hiding is going to do for him.

-Sniper is doing fine until he's not. Like Scout and Spy he's trying to keep the monsters at a distance, which is still not a viable long term strategy, and when they close in he's a little fucked. Also he's got worse daddy/mommy issues than Scout.

-Demoman is either a weepy wreck or charging in with a "heroic last stand" sort of mentality against his feelings of alienation . In the end he's got his mom to support at home, so I think as long as he stays focused he's got a fighting chance.

-Pauling is rattled but has big "survival horror hero" energy imo. She knows who she is, she knows what she's doing, and no amount of "can-you-trust-the-administrator" feelings getting projected onto her surroundings are going to stop her.

-Engineer does ok. He introspects more than Scout or Sniper, but he doesn't ruminate like Spy. He's going to save overthinking for problem solving as opposed to what it means that he just shot a monster that looked a lot like his dead grandfather in the head. If anything the way doors come unlocked by themselves will mess with him the most.

-Soldier is from America and he can fight anything these commie nightmare monsters throw at him. He will say so, at length, and the fact that all the creatures are telling him that he is not really a soldier will only send him on a killing spree.

-Heavy is unphased. He has Sasha, and he needs to make sure Medic doesn't get himself in trouble. This is fine.

-Medic is delighted by such a mishmash of body parts cobbled impossibly together. He could get himself killed trying to vivisect one of these guys, but psychologically he's about as fine as he ever was.

-So long as Pyro can set something on fire, they're fine. This might as well be an amusement park.