#but im not bc i never actually got them down anywhere. theyre just in my brain | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dotnscal · 1 year ago

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ignore this please. its the madness. shield thine eyes. its just fun for me to write these things down.

this is about to be so scary. all of my mental illness has been poured out

romangerri absent from much of this bc i dont have the mental capacity to think about them without boom. my head explodes.

the complexity of this is that kenstewy exists in a multiverse for me. like. there are 60 kenstewy universes existing in my head and i make no effort to differentiate them

anyways. selections from...

fearless (tv)

PEOPLE WILL HATE. PEOPLE WILL HATE FOR THIS........ but i had 1/3 of a celsius the other day and positively lost my mind listening to you belong with me imagining. the cheesiest kenstewy predicament. you know the one. it was insane. but wonderful

speak now (tv)

back to december..... yea its gonna be another kenstewy bullshit im sorry... im sorry.... just the hows life / tell me hows your family.... it feels like them.... then ithink about summer all the beautiful times / i watched you laughing from the passenger side / and realized i loved you in the faaaaall.... yea. yea

ours ... honorable kenstewy mention.... i lose it after the first verse but the first verse is like. lowkey them. sorry.

foolish one.......... i know its cheesy but... kenstewy pining....

you are not... the exception... you will never LEARN YOUR LESSON!!!!!!

you know how to keep me waiting / i know how to act like i’m fine / don’t know what to call this situation / but i know i can’t call you mine

cause when my head is on your shoulder / it starts thinking you’ll come around

cause you got her on your arm / and me in the wings / i’ll get your longing glances / BUT SHE’LL GET YOUR RING (!)

i can see you. honestly in my heart this is solidly a romangerri song.but i also think its sexy slay office romance business sex vibe. so it can really be utilized anywhere and everywhere <3 versatile queen

castles crumbling. if i think about this song too mcuh re: succession i will genuinely make myself sick and vomit.

power went to my head and i couldnt stop / ones i loved tried to help so i ran them offffff / and here i sit alone behind walls of regret / falling down like promises that i never kept

my foes and friends watch my reign end i dont know how it couldve ended this way..........

now theyre screaming at the palace front gates used to chant my name now they’re screaming that they hate... me......... never wanted you to hate me....

red (tv)

state of grace ACOUSTIC. VERSION. i have no fucking evidence for this and no clear reasons but the ambience. the feel of it. is very...... kenstewy.

girls with daddy issues know that better man is not about a romantic relationship its actually about daddy issues when you see it with the daddy issues third eye. so.

on that note. the moment i knew can also be applied to daddy issues imo. i do this activity on a regular basis. and one day i thought about shiv bday or some fancy thing that logan did not attend (only one instance of this tho bc she is pinky <3) and it made me want to vomit and also die.

red kenstewy ill die on this hill

1989

I KNOW PLACES. insanely kenstewy song idk man cant elaborate

sometimes i listen to clean and its like slay kendall bc obviously. when i was drowning thats when i could finally breathe. but also everything other than that line is far too fucking positive to be a kendall song in my heart

you are in love. stfu kenstewy it physically hurts me to listen to it.

ONE NIGHT. HE WAKES. STRANGE LOOK. ON HIS FACE. PAUSES. THEN SAYS. YOURE MY. BEST FRIEND. AND YOU KNEW. WHAT IT WAS. HE IS. IN LOVE.

reputation

look what you made me do this is. this is silly talk. but its so kendall. the drama of it. MY FATHER IS A MALIGNANT PRESENCE ERA. the old kendall cant come to the phone right now.

i dont like your kingdom keys / they once belonged to me / you asked me for a place to sleep / locked me out. then threw a feast WHAT?!!? (thinking about it... this is also giving tomshiv a little hehe... shivorce....he did lock her out and throw a feast kinda)....

READY FOR IT IS ALSO KENDALL REP ERA. PLEASE IF YOU HAVE SEEN THE READY FOR IT KENDALL ROY EDIT WHERE IT OPENS W READY FOR IT AND WHEN SHE SINGS ‘KNEW HE WAS A KILLER’ IT FLASHES WITH K L R. PLEASE. PLEASE. IVE LOST IT AND I NEED IT. BADLY.

dont blame me kenstewy no i wont speak on it just the aura and vibes. my drug is my baby but also cocaine :o

dancing with our hands tied is simultaneously tomshiv (early tho. pre shivorce era) and kenstewy (i’m a mess but i’m the mess that you wanted).... i. I LOVED YOU IN SECRET

you said there was nothing in the world that could stop it / i had a bad feeling.

dress. you know. you know who this one is about. (let siobhan roy be horny). actually looking at thelyrics right now im also feeling some. shall we say. kenstewy mental illness seeping in (i dont want you like a best friend.... WHAT THA FREAK???)

getaway car honestly any fucking relationship in this show bc theyre always fucking around on each other!!!! theyre always up to shady shit!!! DONT PRETEND ITS SUCH A MYSTERY THINK ABOUT THE PLACE WHERE YOU FIRST MET ME (waystar royco)

so it goes... yea i cant comment it just fits everyone and everything but to me it will always be early tomshiv

lover

the man...... like cringe obviously ew cringe cringe. one time i said this to my sister and she said ‘thats because you havent experienced sexism.’ well now i have and im sorry but if i like to listen to the man and feel strongly about shiv roy i can do what i want and fuck you!!

false god cough cough kenstewy. no elaboration at this time.

unfortunately they are all the archer to me. all of them every last one. it oscillates depending on the line sometimes.

i cut off my nose just to spite my face / and i hate my reflection / for years and years.......

cause all of my enemies started out friends... coughcough romangerri coughcough shivorce....

WHO COULD EVER LEAVE ME DARLING... BUT WHO COULD STAY....

folklore

august. AUGUST. its kenstewy 20 year situationship to the fucking max.... early days... harvard days....... stfu i know they were summering in the hamptons and LIVING THIS SONG

whispers / of “are you sure?” / “never have i ever before” ..... stfu

wanting was enough / for me it was enough / to live for the hope of it all / cancel plans just in case you’d call

SO MUCH FOR SUMMER LOVE AND SAYING US CAUSE YOU WERENT MIIIIIINE TO LOOOSE

illicit affairs.... im not saying it im not saying it im not saying it NO! NO! GOD NO! (kenstewy affair era) NOOOO NOBODY SAID THAT

hoax........... another daddy issues song to me......... but also shivorce..... it contains multitudes....

peace. to me peace is like. tomshiv before they had very obvious and insurmountable issues and when they maybe liked each other. i feel that shiv has a very (repressed) desire to love and be loved and just kind of cant do it but like.... in her heart she wanted them to work but also.... they did not <3 oh baby they did not <3

exile.... yea its gonna be the shivorce yea yea yea who was shocked. who was surprised.

seven you already know where its going.

i’ve been meaning to tell you / i think your house is haunted / your dad is always mad and that must be why / and i think you should come live with me / and we can be pirates / then you won’t have to cry / or hide in the closet

knife to my fucking gut aside.... oh baby is he (kendall) hiding in the closet :P (im so silly)

my tears ricochet giving daddy issues sorry.

i didnt have it in myself to go with grace / ‘cause when i’d fight you used to tell me i was brave

you had to kill me but it killed you just the same / cursing my name / wishing i stayed / you turned into your worst fears

not even gonna take a crack at this is me trying. figure it out for yourselves i cant open that can of worms.

the 1 i wont say it (kenstewy)

mad woman... shivvy. honey. were gonna get you out of here. ITS OBVIOUS THAT WANTING ME DEAD HAS REALLY BROUGHT YOU TWO TOGETHER.

evermore

many people have said to me (no people have said this) olivia. if illicit affairs is giving kenstewy affair for you. what about ivy. i cant really speak on it but it just doesnt give the same effect. it doesnt fit them to me. idk.

coney island SHIVORCE. ANTHEM.

did i close my fist around something delicate? / did i shatter you? yup. yup.

champagne problems i do not feel particularly strongly about actually in relation to succession ( i feel very strongly about it in my every day life ) but. she wouldve made such a lovely bride what a shame shes fucked in the head.

now the daddy issues sufferers will once again recognize that tolerate it is also a song about daddy issues.

“i notice everything you do or dont do / youre so much older and wiser and i / wait by the door like im just a kid / use my best colors for your portrait” yea yea

“i made you my temple my mural my sky / now im begging for footnotes in the story of your life / drawing hearts in the by line / always taking up too much space or time”

midnights

one time i was listening to anti hero and was like haha its kind of kendall bc its so dramatic and shit but then i was like. there are very few circumstances where he would admit to being the problem.

ok sorry. sorry i know i said coney island shivorce anthem but MIDNIGHT RAIN. SHIVORCE ANTHEM.

i broke his heart cause he was nice (STFU) / HE WAS SUNSHINE I WAS MIDNIGHT RAIN / HE WANTED IT COMFORTABLE I WANTED THAT PAIN / HE WANTED A BRIDE I WAS MAKING MY OWN NAME (!!!!!) / CHASING THAT FAME

havent thought in depth about this one but. maroon. tomshiv. boom

labyrinth is SO early tomshiv that it hurts. shiv liking tom and being like. fuck what the fuck what the fuck. no.

great war everybody because everybody fucks each other up in multiple ways. they are all always having great wars.

mastermind is also astronomically tomshiv. they are both mastermind and mastermind is them but particularly shiv.

no one wanted to play with me as a little kid / so ive been scheming like a criminal ever since / to make them love me and make it seem effortless / this is the first time i felt the need to confess

hits different so fucking embarrassingly kenstewy its EMBARRASSING. how kenstewy it is to my heart.

i pictured you with other girls / in looooove / then threw up on the street. (tell me that is not young kenstewy)

MOVING ON WAS ALWAYS EASY FOR ME TO DO. IT HITS DIFFERENT. IT HITS DIFFERENT CAUSE ITS YOU.

wouldve. couldve. shouldve. need i say.... shivorce. and it goes BOTH WAYS. particularly first verse and the bridge

if you tasted poison you couldve / spit me out at the first chance

living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts / give me back my girlhood it was mine first

ok so sorry about this. i think im done now ( for now evil laugh). i think this was good for me. i do not have many fellow succession enjoyers in real life and do not wish to floor those who i am acquainted with. so i needed to write this down and throw it out here to drift away in the waters of oblivion.

cant believe taylor swift wrote so many songs about succession....

#i need help.#normal people make playlists #evil people do this.

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demadogs · 2 years ago

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can you share your first kiss vision

GLADLY!!! also this is more just a fun concept to think about than a genuine prediction. this got kinda fanficy ngl.

so i envision it mid s5 pretty well into whatever danger will is in and mike and el are completely broken up. in this scenario its more of a thing like max where hes still himself just in danger of being tranced or something like that rather than s2 when he was possessed. (tho i dont think his danger will be the same as max’s. i think he has a deeper connection to vecna that will lead to a completely different kinda danger than what max was in.) anyways, the gang is all together and will is always being monitored whenever hes not in immediate danger just in case, similar to max. like 24/7 even when they sleep.

usually jonathan has this role but something else requires his attention so mike volunteers to keep an eye on will one night. they share a bed bc this is my vision and i make the rules and of course im only giving them one bed. as theyre getting ready to sleep mike seems visibly anxious and will asks whats wrong and mike just tells him that hes scared for him. i imagine this is the night before some big plan to defeat everything and mikes scared it wont work.

ive had this vision in my head for a while of them both in a quiet bedroom at night sitting on a bed and mikes talking about how ever since he went missing hes had such a fear of losing will for good and mikes silently crying. mike tells him “i saw your body. did anybody ever tell you that? when they lifted the fake body out of the water at the query, i was there. we were all there.” will didnt know this. mike tells him that the party rarely talks about all the upside down stuff when theres no danger present but they all have ptsd and nightmares. he tells him that their nightmares are about demogorgans and demodogs or the mindflayer or being shot at but mikes… mikes nightmares are just reliving the moment they lifted wills body out of the water.

mike tells him how the day he thought he was dead was the worst day of his life and how when he got him back he never wanted to let him go but then when the mindflayer got him he was so terrified of losing him again and he just has this terribly feeling that this time hes gonna be taken from him for good.

theyre both crying and will hugs mike super tight. a REAL HUG WITH EMOTION AND TEARS!!!! mike tells him “i cant lose you” and will says “im not going anywhere”.

eventually mike pulls away from the hug a bit but is still holding him. he rests his forehead on wills and stays there. will brings his hands up to his face and wipes his tears with his thumbs and leaves his hands there. mikes looking at his lips and its obvious that hes thinking about kissing him but hes not doing it because hes scared of risking their friendship and losing will in a different way.

then i love the idea of will knowing that mike wants to kiss him and he just nods and whispers “do it” and then mike kisses him.

mike pulls away but still leaves his face really close to his and hes kinda mentally freaking out and we can tell but will just smiles so big cuz hes so fricken happy and that instantly calms mike down and he kisses him again.

isnt my imagination great. someone send this to the duffers.

if someone wants to write this into an actual fic go nuts but plz tag me in it and credit me in the notes on ao3.

#i have like three other byler first kiss concepts in my head too lmao #i love this one tho #i have so many concepts like these of every show and every book ive ever read to the point where i genuinely didnt realize that most people-#daydream about themselves in a scenario with someone they like or something they want #couldnt be me my brain is full of fictional characters and nothing else #sometimes i even mix book universes and make an entire new story and new characters #like not a crossover a completely new character by taking traits of like 6 other book characters and giving then all to one #but im not a writer so ill never do anything with it #but i can outline the entire thing and give it to someone else to write #id be nothing without fiction #stranger things #byler #eden answers

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ennoshawty · 3 years ago

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HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu captains #daichi sawamura #oikawa toru #kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #ushijima wakatoshi #bokuto kotaro #x reader

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depressedtransguy · 2 years ago

Note

MORE ABOUT MY OCS!!!!!

okay so marley is a certified genius, sherlock level. she has a photographic memory and a mind palace, thought it's small so she jokes that its a mind apartment. she only speaks if she has too, preferring to keep quiet in her books and her notes. she lives with her father in a run down two bedroom house. marley was homeschooled until she was 14, because she was accelerating at a pace faster than preschool teachers knew how to accommodate, so she mostly taught herself and her father helped anyway he could. at 14 tho, he wanted her to develop social skills. (she doesnt really talk to anyone in highschool so it doesnt really help her social skills)

next up is amara. amara has run away from almost every foster home that has housed her. she lived on the streets for a bit before finding her way to the town where marley lives (theres no name for it yet sorry) and she breaks into the school and 'enrolls' herself and just stays there overnight. she steals clothes from the lost and found and the locker rooms and takes full advantage of the free lunches and breakfasts. shes resourceful and street smart, but really clumsy, which isnt helpful when youre illegally staying in a school that you dont actually go to

emily is nates twin sister. shes on the cheer team with her three friends. shes snarky, protective of her loved ones, and competitive. both she and nate live alone, for the most part. their parents are never home, always away on business, so they have a big house all to themselves. emily loves going out to fancy places (using her parents money ofc, shes living that rich kid life) with her friends and just generally being chaotic. shes the only person that has managed to beat nate at mariokart

nate, twin sister of emily, is a geek. he loves video games, movies, comics, and is not a fan of other people. hes not doing well in school, finds it hard to focus (no im not projecting my school life onto nate why do you ask) anyways he gets a tutor, jamie who ill get to in a sec. eventually, nates grade goes up and he and jamie get food to celebrate and anyways they start dating and theyre gonna go to prom together, but nate and emily get into a really bad car accident and nate dies

jamie is a theater kid. he loves doing musicals especially. him and his two friends always try out together and hope to get leads. jamies one of those theater kids thats like super outgoing in theater but super quiet anywhere else. jamie came out as trans in eighth grade and since its a small town and everyone knows everyone, it was a big deal. his parents are super supportive and got him a binder and everything and got the school to change his name. he started tutoring nate in math and develops a crush which he doesnt do anything about bc respect and so when nate asks him out he gay panics tm and when nate dies hes devastated but they were only out to emily, emilys friends, and jamies friends so hes like sad but he cant tell why and anyways its heartbreaking

max is a jock. hes the top basketball player in the team. hes basically troy in hsm but like jockier. hes brash and tends to not think about consequences. he has a sort of god complex and is pretty selfish. post character development he starts using he/they pronouns and is more respectful of other people. flash from spiderman homecoming vibes

anyways that was a lot sorry i just have a lot of thoughts about them

akwjsjjrjrjrjjr I love them all so much🥺🥺

especially Nate AND THEN YOU KILLED HIM WTF /nm but >:((((

please feel free to talk about your feelings all the time I would love to hear everything /gen :DDDDDDDD

(also just to confirm so this is like in your own world and not in like another fandoms universe, right?)

#depressedtransguy00 asks

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jovialjuggernaut-draws · 3 years ago

Note

do you have any advice for drawing nsft art? you’ve made me want to get into it

cjbcjdhdhd SO funny u send this ask to ME of all ppl, as tho im any good at drawing sexy art at all-

anyway i dont have any Advice, per se, since im just sort of.... doodling??

but heres what i do when im drawing horny art:

1] i use a brush in firealpaca that looks like using a pencil on paper! this makes my lines very soft and idk vague? bc i feel like the soft lines catch Feeling and Movement better than super solid lines

2] blushy blushy blushy when ur Aroused your skin flushes and tbh tbh i just think its So Cute to have my blorbos flushing all the way down- anywhere that gets Flushed is fair game! i do cheeks collarbones shoulders tiddies lower tummy inner thighs booty knees elbows

3] expressions! no matter what the bodys r doing, if the expressions Good, the arts Good! no advice here except to practice expressions ffhhfjdhfhdhhdhf

and then ofc general art advice you should always sketch out poses before committing to them, layer sketches of increasing detail on top of each other (i usually just do pose planning then clean sketch but im lazy and dont proper lineart often)

and choose uhhh darker more desaturated color pallettes??? idk i always eyeball my colors but when i actually fully color horny art i push darker and grayer to give it a Nightime Mood look

anyway thats all i got as usual just look at a bunch of art from different artists u like and compare contrast what theyre doing what u like what u dont and also ull never get anywhere if u dont practice so jump in w both feet!!

#art advice #sounds dumb to tag that since i sure as hell dont know what im doing

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heyitsyn · 4 years ago

Text

Manager!Seijoh IWA ROUTE

a/n: uwuwuwuwuwu my mans iwa chan :’)

IM A SIMP FOR IWAIZUMI HAJIME (27) ATHLETE TRAINER

uwu filo!iwa in this :)

and also, listen to lauv while reading this since i wrote this and that song was playing on repeat O_O and also this song

this is my self-request uwu

HES SUCH A POUTY BABIE BLS LOVE ON HIM

onwards we goooo

hihihihihihi yey im so excited for this yall dont even know

ANYWAYS

so,,,,

when iwa first saw you, he thought you were just a cute little thing

your shorter height, your puffy cheeks, and the wide eyes you had whenever you saw someone, or him, do a really cool spiking move

he initially thought of you as a cute little sister hes never had

ehehe that finna change

then the,,,, bullying thing happened

if youd like to read this part, its right here

when he saw you bloodied, all battered,

dear lordie he was finna break some ankles

ONG I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT SANGWOO YET HERE I AM

like that image of you will probably stay in his memory until he dies of the ripe age of 200

ngl it kinda traumatized him a little bit of how tired and pained you look with the tears rolling down your face and the blood that was escaping your body through your wounds

god you didnt deserve any of that

you deserved the world and the universe yet some people dared to take away your worth

ooo he was so mad

miyo was,,,, hurt??

can i say that??

i dont wanna,,,, explain bara arms iwa hurting a girl so youre gonna have to imagine that for yourselves

but at the end when they said slap, he didnt just ✨S L A P ✨ her

he ✨ B R O K E S O M E A N K L E S ✨

oiks is actually scared of him after that

like oiks had to peel him off of her and towards the infirmary where you and the team were

‘IWAIZUMI HAJIME, STOP!’

oof the first and last time oikawa tooru ever said that full name

he was breathing heavy and he was so ✨ A N G R Y ✨ with what she did to you yet he hears your soft scoldings, telling him off for hurting a girl

he wanted to see you

like right now

iwa tore himself from oikawa’s grasp and ✨ N Y O O M E D ✨ himself to the nurse’s office

there, you sat on the bed with the others scattered either on other beds or on the floor

you smiled at the sight of him and he walked towards you and engulfed you in his arms

‘youre okay now. im here’

he whispered and you buried your face into his chest, breathing in his unique scent

lavender mixed with peppermint

he refused to leave your side so he ✨ M A D E ✨ some room on the bed beside you to sit and he wrapped his arm around your waist, holding you close

you held his hand while oikawa talked to you and as you shamefully bowed your head

but you were forgiven and everything was all good until the third years really got into plan

makki and mattsun promised to handle it all as they had family in the justice field while oikawa would go and get the girl suspended

‘but what about me?! i want-’

‘iwaizumi, you literally hit her. it’d be best if you’re not involved right now as you were the only one who physically touched her in a harmful manner like that’

ong when it come to y/n, the meme team is replaced by the assassin team

he tried to fight but in the end, 3 overpowered 1 and he was forced to sit back and opted to comfort you instead

he made sure you were safe to walk home but that day, you were the one who asked him to spend time with him

just you two

like after seeing him seethingly enter back into the room, you reached out and held his hand in yours, eyes trained on your fingers fiddling with his

‘iwa-san,,,, you said you downloaded the new godzilla movie?’

you whispered but he could still hear you and his heart swelled at your meek voice

‘yea, i did. and my mom bought those chips you like’

your eyes flitted up to meet his eyes and a soft smile spread on your lips and there was this thumping in his heart

maybe that was the first time that iwaizumi hajime felt differently towards you

a smile that seemed to be differently perceived than the rest

and it wasnt for the whole team

it was for him

and him alone

the trek to his house was quiet but you would hum nursery rhymes or the songs you heard earlier in the radio while skipping every few steps and tightly holding on to his hand

iwaizumi’s olive eyes watched you still radiate energy despite being so hurt for a long time

they then trailed to your linked hands and he unintentionally squeezed it, only figuring out he did it when you looked up to him and squeezed it back with a smile

he wanted to do something to make you forget of what happened

he didnt want you to think about the cruelty and pain so he was going to make sure you would continue smiling

thankfully, his parents werent home so he wouldnt have to explain why he has a bandage-covered girl with him

iwa led you upstairs to where his room was and your eyes widened when you saw what was inside

tiny action figurines of animes like bakugo from boku no hero academia or a tiny pikachu on his desk

there was a large country flag that you didnt recognize and a few godzilla posters and volleyball players decorating beside it

however, besides those normal things you wouldve expected,

there were many polaroids

polaroid pictures that were everywhere with no specific layout pattern and just placed anywhere that had room

iwa watched as you dazedly walked forward and entered the room to move towards the wall by his desk that had the most pictures against it

from pictures of him and oikawa to the third years to him and his parents or just the sunrise and human silhouettes

your fingers reached forward and traced the picture of him and the third years when they were still first years and took a spontaneous trip to the beach

‘mattsun stole his dad’s car and drove us to the beach without a license’

iwaizumi’s voice answered your questions and you looked back, shimmering eyes

this room,,, wasnt just a normal, teenage boy’s room

this was a room that represented iwaizumi hajime

from his natural character description like his love for volleyball evident in the volleyball player posters to the underneath description that was hidden like his love for godzilla and his love of taking pictures of the people he cares about the most

it was all that made up iwaizumi hajime

your feet took you to stand in front of him, still standing at the doorway, and you stood on your toes to try and be eye-level with him

‘youre really cool, iwa-san’

you whispered and his ears turned red, not from the compliment, but by the close distance between you two

iwa clearedhis throat and ruffled your hair roughly, pushing you down slightly back to the balls of your feet

‘i already knew that, brat. now go and sit over there and be comfortable or whatever while i go get the food’

he hurriedly turned to hide his growing red face but you stopped him

‘iwa-san,,, ano,,, can,, i borrow a hoodie?’

you mumbled, nervously thinking he might refuse

but he grunted a response, not bothering to turn around

‘take your pick’

you smiled and thanked him before bounding over to the wardrobe that was pushed against the wall across his bed that was against the corner by his window

inside had so many hoodies and there were also shirts that were hung up on the other half

they were all graphic tees that either had american bands or anime or game references

opting for a mint green hoodie that says ‘SONIC NYOOM’, you had an undershirt under your button up and as you slipped the bloodied long sleeve off, he swung the door open, eyes focused on the tray of coke filled glasses

then he looked up and almost dropped it at the sight of you,,, like that

‘OH MY GOD SORRY’

he shrieked and carefully but hurriedly backtracked back to the hallway

ofc you were shocked too but you quickly put the hoodie on and went to get him

iwaizumi’s heart was hammering in his chest and he was VERY red with embarrassment

how could he see you like that?!

a girl who wasnt his shouldnt be seen like that by his eyes!

a touch on his arm reminded him of his position and he was still holding the tray but it was clear from the liquid in the cups that he was shaking slightly

‘iwa-san, its okay. i still had a shirt on so dont misunderstand’

you reasoned and he nodded, still not looking at you

the beginning of the movie was quite awkward as you both were sitting next to each other on the floor, backs against his mattress while the laptop played godzilla in front of yall

but it seems it was just him who was feeling this way bc you were intrigued at this weird monster that was squshing building under its foot and you continued munching on the food

iwa stood up and coughed

‘im going to take a shower’

you paused it and stared up at him, a chip halfway in your mouth

‘oh? you want me to wait for you?’

he agressively shook his head

‘no! its okay i watched it already. just,,,, watch it’

at the end, his words came out jumbled in his hurry to go and calm his heart down

you shrugged and unpaused the movie to continue watching

iwa spent his time in the shower, thinking and trying to think of stupid thoughts like the time oikawa almost choked on a peanut when they were in middle school to distract him of thoughts of how adorable you were

ONG HE WAS JUST SHOWERING AND INNOCENTLY DOING SHOWER THINGS

‘no, i said she was like a sister to me. and a sister she’ll remain’

okay ngl even though theyre not related, im worried yall would be like ‘iNcESt’ but bls a lot of people have tried to sibling-zoned people yet realized they liked them in THAT way

as he wrapped himself with a towel, he then realized

oh my god he didnt bring clothes

LMAO NOOOO IWAAAAA

iwa frantically looked around and he saw his mother’s sakura themed robe and he paused, arguing silently with him if he should wear it

well, it was either that or he went back into the room and showed you,,,,,, this

sucking in a sharp breath, he kept the towel around his waist and slipped his arms through the tight arm holes and he awkwardly tried to keep it tied since he was so much bigger than his tiny mom

what is happening

you saw the door opening and excitedly turned to tell him about this one scene when your voice died down in your throat at the sight of him

here was iwaizumi hajime, ultra muscle buff man who gets abs with a simple glance of the gym, wearing an all too-tight pink, cherry blossom print robe that was so tight the tie around it was shaking to keep it together

‘dont’

he whispered and that snapped your remaining surprise to double over in laughter

‘its so cute! iwa-san, youre so cute!’

you shrieked and he growled and hurriedly went to to grab grey sweatpants and a shirt before running straight back to the bathroom

when he finally came back out, his face was still red and he was pouting as he sat next to you back to his seat

he could feel you staring at him while looking constipated as you held your laugh in and the second your eyes met, your giggles fell out

iwa rolled his eyes

‘yes yes let it out’

‘hehe, iwa-san, i didnt know you had that style’

‘it isnt! i didnt want to walk in here practically naked with you in the room!’

he growled and you nodded, still not quite believing it

‘hai hai. just say you like pink, i wont tell’

you waved and iwa felt offended

‘what do you mean ‘hai hai’?! its really not!’

your lips pursed to keep more giggles in and iwa growled again before lunging to grab your sides and tickling you

of course being careful to not touch your wounds

you shrieked at the ticklish feeling and iwa laughed as you made weak attempts to push him off

‘huh? what was that? whatd you say? cant talk anymore, can ya?’

he teased

‘NO!!!! IWA-SAAAAN!!!!!’

you shouted in between your laughter and he finally let up when you squealed out your apologies and promised to never say it again

you breathed air into your lungs and sat back up to recollect yourselves

iwa saw the strands that escaped your bun and they were scattered everywhere looking messy with your flushed cheeks and teary eyes

oh my god you were beautiful

he was so happy that you still kept that smile despite what happened and he was going to fight to keep it there

forever

it was about nearly the end when you finally realized how different iwaizumi’s hair looked

‘oi, iwa-san, your hair is not naturally spiky?’

he continued eating the chips while still watching the movie

‘what would you expect? even shittykawa’s hair is like this. did ya know that he wakes up extra early to curl it into that shitty mess?’

your jaw dropped

‘EEEHHHH???!!!!!!!’

later, you asked him how he does his hair for school and he blindly reached for the gel that was resting on his desk before tossing it to you

‘here’

you looked at it and flickered over to his hair and then you had the greatest realization

‘GODZILLA-SAMA!’

you pointed and he stopped eating, turning to give you a confused look

‘ha?’

you shrieked in an another round of laughter

‘IWA-SAN LIKES GODZILLA-SAMA SO MUCH HE DOES HIS HAIR AFTER HIM!!!!’

you doubled over to the floor, clutching your stomach and iwaizumi’s flustered expression made you laugh harder

he knew you were smart but,,, not this smart

you figured out his secret

the secret he’s hidden since he was practically a toddler

even his best friend, the guy hes known since he was born, never made the connection

yet here you are, figuring it out not even a year of knowing him

was this part of the many reasons he,, felt his heart beat for you?

oikawa was relieved that you had the bright twinkle in your eyes the next time he saw you and you were actively talking to iwaizumi in that early morning practice

‘oh? y/n-chan, is iwa-chan your best friend now?’

he tried not to sound jealous for his own best friend’s closeness to you and he added a teasing smile for extra measure

okay that hurted me a bit

iwaizumi snarled and blasted the volleyball towards his face before he could even yell or shout

‘iwa-san, dont do that’

you chided softly, small hands wrapping around his muscly arm

but iwa patted your head

‘deserving people deserve things to happen to them’

you rolled your eyes but smiled at him

‘hai hai’

the next week, iwa still kept a close eye on you in case someone else decided to mess with you

but you told him that you swear youd tell him if someone did and he trusts you so he backed off a little

one day, he was eating lunch with the other third years in their classroom when you busted through the door, excitedly holding your phone

‘iwa-san! i figured out what country your flag was!’

he was halfway of shoving rice in his mouth when iwa looked at you

‘oh? you couldve just asked me though?’

you pouted and went to pull a chair from another desk to sit beside him

‘nooo. i wanted to work for that information. so you’re from the philippines, iwa-san?’

he nodded proudly

‘yep’

your eyes shone with interest

‘really?! you look japanese so it must be one of your parents. hey, iwa-san, which island are you from? i read about them and they have like 7641 islands-’

the others watched as you read through the article in your phone and iwa wasnt even following your words, instead staring at you with a dazed look and a lovesick smile

mattsun, makki, and oikawa exchanged looks of surprise because in all the years theyve known him especially oikawa, iwa was never interested in girls and such

he was a straight forward man with goals and straight sight to get them done with no distractions like relationships or love

yet here he was

slowly falling in love with you without even knowing he is

he continued to fall with the simplest things about you

from the perfume that you wore everyday to the way you would tuck your hair behind your ear when you were talking to someone

little quirks he used to miss was now being noticed even if you were right behind him and not in his line of vision

now, the boys were starting to see the difference of their precious ace

it was as if when he started to like you, they knew immediately by how he was acting

then one day during practice, you were late and they were all looking around for you and when they couldnt find you, they met back in the gym with nervous looks

iwa was already pacing around, a scary aura radiating off of him, and kindaichi, who went with him to look around the school, warned the others of iwaizumi’s worry

‘he was slamming doors open and he was walking so fast i had to run to even keep up with him’

then you busted through the gym door

you were actually picking up food for the team and sweets and you were held up when makki’s puffs were still being cooked

they rallied around you to make sure you werent hurt and you assured them but iwa pulled them away like picked them up and threw them off to the side and took you in his arms

iwa thought you were hurt and he was so worried something happened to you again

the hug was bone-crushing with how hard he was squeezing you but you felt his worry though and you freed your arms to wrap them around his neck

‘im okay, iwa-san’

you whispered in his ear and he nodded

‘let me hold you for a second’

he mumbled and you nodded

‘oi, theres food in the bags so make sure you eat it all. coach paid for it all so dont leave behind anything’

the mention of the food distracted them from you and iwa and they piled on top of each other to reach their food first

iwa was grateful that you distracted the others from seeing him being vulnerable towards you

‘i thought-’

‘shh,,, you have me right here, right now. safe and sound’

you knew how much seeing you all battered messed him up and his attempt of making you forget about it has been

and his worry of you being gone without no sign of where you went will forever be there and he will always have that thought in the back ofhis mind

the next time you came over, you actually met his parents

since you went home early before, you didnt catch his parents when they came home around 10 minutes after you left

but this time, they were already home with his mom cooking dinner while his father was sitting on the dining chair reading a newspaper

iwa walked through the door, shouting he was home, and you did the same thing to be customary

oof his parents were surprised

his mom turned around to share a look of surprise with her husband

sure they havent seen tooru in a while but they were pretty sure his voice wasnt that high pitched

right?

‘hajime, did you hit tooru so much you ruined his-’

then his mother stopped talking at the sight of you holding iwa’s hand tightly when yall stepped around the corner

you sheepishly smiled at them and bowed your head in greeting

oh my

so this was why iwaizumi hajime-san was really really really handsome

his parents were freaking good looking

like his mother was aphrodite with her flawless melanin skin and doe shaped eyes with a mole under her left eye

and his father was like ares, so handsome yet still manly and his appearance was a special type of good-looking with his buffness and ruffed appearance

‘iwa-san, i didnt know your parents were gods’

you mumbled, still staring at them

iwaizumi choked and coughed, flustered

‘oh my!’

his mother placed a hand over her mouth

‘hello’

his father stood up to walk in front of you and held his hand out

‘i’m hajime’s father’

you let go of hajime’s hand to shake his own with both of your hands

‘really nice to meet you! i’m l/n y/n! seijoh volleyball manager! first year!’

you introduced then stepped aside to fully bow 90 degrees

iwaizumi thought it was so cute of how flustered you were at meeting his parents

‘ay nako! nak, i didnt know you had such a beautiful girlfriend!’

she squealed and hurriedly went to stand in front of you and gently grasped your arms to stand you back straight and took a good look at you

‘youre so beautiful, iha. nice skin, pretty eyes, ang ganda!’

even with your research of tagalog, you didnt quite understand what she was saying

iwa noticed your slightly confused expression and he laughed, tucking his hands in his pockets

‘sorry, my nay speaks in taganese when she gets excited’

‘t-taganese?’

‘tagalog and japanese’

you nodded in understanding

it was time to put your basic reserach to test

‘hello po’

you greeted her and nervously took her hand and pressed the back of it to your forehead before slowly lowering it down and letting go

her wide eyes made you think you did something bad or even offensive!

‘i-i’

‘HAY NAKO, HAJIMEE~!’

she shrieked

‘YUNG-!!! YUNG-!!!’

okay im terrified

iwa noticed his mother’s malfunction and gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder and veered her back to her kitchen

‘sorry about her, l/n-chan. its just,,,, hajime hasnt brought home a girl before. and you doing that mustve done it in for her’

you worriedly watched hajime calm his mom down with a smile and talking to her hushed

in their perspective,,,

‘shes so nice, nak! marry her, okay? shes very pretty and she made an effort to please your nanay, so go and marry her!’

ohmylord im nervous

initially, iwa only wanted to go and hang out with you and watch a movie

not have a full dinner with his family

lmao i shouldve told you that youve been friends for months now

his mother cooked sinigang and adobo and more filipino dishes, adding even more when she saw you were joining them

the dining table was covered with a large plate full of food and you were so fascinated because this was a side of iwa that you wanted to know more about

‘wow!’

you said, not thinking, at the deep-fried fish that still had its eyeballs intact

iwa genuinely thought you would’ve shyed away from it in disgust but your eyes were glistening with genuine interest

‘iwa-san! youre so lucky you get to eat this stuff!’

you told him, looking over at his direction

while mrs iwaizumi was lading in the soup into the big bowl, mr iwaizumi was sitting at the dining table, watching your interaction and hajime telling you what each food was and your noises of surprise

he watched his son laugh when you said the palabok reminded you of the orange boy hinata

and he also watched his son look at you so lovestruck and exactly like how he looks at his wife

soon, his mother finished and they rounded the table before saying a quick prayer to bless the food and digging in

‘so, what do you want to start with, iha?’

mrs iwaizumi asked and your wide eyes looked around

‘hm, im not sure. whats your favorite iwa-san?’

you looked to your right towards hajime who was busy eating and stopped before pointing his lips towards a direction

‘that one’

‘hah?’

you asked

mrs iwaizumi laughed at her son’s actions

‘sorry, l/n-chan, my son has adapted my traits. he was pointing to this, adobo. do you want some?’

‘yes please’

the smell made your mouth water and you started to tuck in

maybe it was your managerial instincts, but you used your napkin to wipe hajime’s lips and he was also used to this and turned his head to make it easier for you then he went to grab the water jug and re-fill your glass

once it was done, you both silently went back to eating

his parents watched his exchange and it was like watching a married couple taking care of each other

‘so, l/n-chan, you said you were their manager’

mr iwaizumi started and you nodded, wiping your lips

‘yes. i have been for a while now and please, call me y/n’

‘hajime actually told us he had a new manager for his team and tooru told us too. but we didnt know you were a girl. its just so interesting for hajime to bring you home as he has never really had any female friends’

mrs iwaizumi’s comment made you chuckle and iwa’s eyes widened in embarassment

‘nay! of course ive had female friends! ive had friends from all genders!’

he reasoned but you teasingly smiled at him

‘ah, im not really surprised. iwa-san doesnt exactly have the appearance that girls are brave enough to approach’

he sent you a betrayed glance

‘hah?! what’s that supposed to mean?!’

you shrugged, going back to your food

‘im just saying that you always have this intense look in your eyes and youre always frowning. but its cute so its fine. and besides, i dont think theyve seen you laugh since you dont really smile a lot, iwa-san’

‘but you’ve seen me smile!’

‘eung. but its only to me. if they knew the stuff i knew like you being a godzilla fan or your collection of succelents, theyd see you like oikawa-san’

‘HAH?! YOU SEE ME LIKE SHITTYKAWA?!’

mrs iwaizumi held her husband’s hand on the table as they watched you both bicker and tease each other with a smile

hajime has always been on the rougher side of things and he doesnt really have many close friends other than the team and even then, tooru is the only one he can really be himself around

yet here you are, bringing out the boy hajime really is and making him laugh, a sound his parents dont really hear outside the house

and your eyes

god, your eyes held admiration, life,,,, and you might not know this yet,, but love

her eyes trailed her son who teasingly headbutted you and you faking a surprise and doing the same

then you heard his father’s cough which brought you back to where you were and the situation and the people that were there

you felt embarrassment creeping up inside you and you bowed

‘im sorry for acting like that, iwaizumi-san. i-’

‘no, dont apologize, darling. please, dont’

her soft smile made the nerves in you ease and hajime’s father winked at him and he knew exactly what his father was trying to say

after dinner, you volunteered to wash the plates but they veered you away from there and towards the living room

‘oh my god, pops! stop her!’

hajime whined because he knows what his mother was going to do

she was going to show him his baby pictures

you sat on the beige couch and watched as she reached under the coffee table and revealed a few albums that had iwaizumi hajime written on the cover

‘now, y/n-chan, hajime wasnt always this pouty. in fact, he used to always have a smile on his face and laughed at the littlest things! like right here! a leaf fell on him and he-’

stories of his childhood was exchanged throughout the night and you were laughing so hard that tears were falling out of your eyes while hajime wrapped your shoulders with his arm and he would squeeze you tightly whenever you made fun of him

‘oh dear! iwa-san! you-!’

you didnt finished as you continued to laugh and he sighed

‘nay, can we go eat dessert now?’

he asked his mother and she was beginning to feel sorry for him so she smiled and nodded

‘okay. hajime, come help me’

‘iwaizumi-san, i can-’

‘no, y/n-chan. dont you worry your pretty little head about anything and just look through more of these pictures’

hajime followed his mother to their kitchen before she stopped and turned around

his mother’s height was around 5′1 so she had to look up to meet his eyes and her hands were clasped around his biceps

she is definitely beautiful and he cursed at how little he got from his mother other than her skin color

mrs iwaizumi married her husband and immigrated to japan to have a family and your polite action from earlier moved her as she hasnt experienced that in nearly 2 decades

‘nay, shes,,,, just a friend’

he reasoned, a wobbly smile to cover up his want for that title to change

yet mothers def knows best and saw right through it

she gave him a firm look with furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips

‘nak, dont lie to yourself. i raised you to never tell a lie and lying to yourself is considered lying to someone. she’s not your KAibigan, shes your kaIBIGan’

now, hajime knew a little bit of tagalog as his mother made sure he was able to at least speak to his relatives back home

so he got a hint of what she was saying yet was confused

then he realized it

his blush creeped up his neck and he chuckled, ducking his head low to avoid his mother’s eyes

‘nak, listen to me. papunta ka pa lang, pabalik na ako. youre still growing and you may be confused right now, but make sure to think wisely and dont live with regrets. nanay doesnt want you to go through it all by yourself since she knows how hard it was. so please, listen to me and pursue her. shes special, hajime. she makes you so, so happy. i see it in your eyes, her eyes, god has fated you together. i feel it’

now if a filipino mother actually tells their son to go after a girl, thats a pretty big thing as its known that mothers are the hardest to convince and are fiercely protective of their sons, especially if its an only son, but mrs iwaizumi literally tells hajime to go court you because she sees how happy you make him and is willing to let hajime go to you

definitely his mother’s words stuck to him and as he walked you home, he was busy thinking that he was quiet and you were worried as he would be talking right now

‘iwa-san? you okay?’

you asked and he blinked, taken back to reality from his daydream

‘hm, yea’

he answered to look at you

hes been pining for months now and he slipped his hand into yours, holding it tightly

uwu if you want to see iwa moments with y/n, read through the seijoh manager series as theres a lot of them in there

he wanted you yet, he knew it would be selfish of him to keep you in the future

he would be a college student while you’re in your 2nd year

would you want to be so far away from him?

could you handle it?

‘yanno, iwa-san, your dad told me something interesting’

you suddenly said, squeezing his hand and kicking rocks while looking up at the night sky

‘what was it? something embarrassing?’

he immediately feared that they told you that story when he was still potty training and he fell straight into the toilet

‘hmm,,, no. he told me that he met your nanay when she was a high school student and he was a in an intern at your lolo’s company’

iwa listened and he had a smile at how you said the tagalog word for grandfather

‘he said she almost ran him over by her bike and she fled but they met again when she visited your lolo. through that, they became friends and then she confessed to him. apparently, he declined because she was younger than him, although just 3 years, and he was leaving for his own country in a few months so he didnt know if she would wait for him’

were,,,, you reading his mind?

iwa knew of his parents story yet with you telling it, it sounded a million times more interesting

‘yet she promised him. thats it, just a promise. that she would remain faithful to him, she would keep herself for him and when she finally graduates, she would go and find him and they could be happy together. he said it was the longest 3 years of his life yet when he saw in the airport, he felt like the wait was worth it. because he gets to hold the embodiment of happiness in his arms for the rest of his life’

you finished and he hummed

‘times have changed, y/n’

‘even you?’

you stopped walking and he naturally stopped too

‘would you wait for me like he did if i promised myself to you? if i promised you that despite the few years of waiting, i would still be yours and remain yours until we’re ready to be together?’

WHAT IS HAPPENING!!!!!!!

iwa’s heart was drumming in his chest and he wanted so desparately to look at you in the eyes but you were making that impossible as your head was bowed and your eyes were fixed on the concrete you both stood on

‘of course, i would’

your head snapped up and e/c clashed with olive eyes

‘i would wait for you. we may,,, be young right now. and they might think we’re,,, being impulsive. but i dont care. because right now, all that matters, is you and me. we can think about the consequences later, but right now, i just want to kiss you’

he admitted, red ears seen by the moonlight

your body shook

‘do it, no balls’

well,,,, he has the balls

and under the moon, at 8:34 pm, iwaizumi hajime kissed you

OML THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT SEIJOH SHORT WHEN HE WAS TALKING TO OIKAWA AND HIS NEIGHBORS ARE LIKE ‘AH SHITE HERE WE GO AGAIN’

it didnt come as a surprise to the team when yall announced your relationship

well,, you both actually didnt tell them outright until like weeks later

what can you say?

you and iwa are very private people and you dont really like to show off in public

even though yall lit rally are stuck to the hip and he does things that he doesnt even think hes doing but he is totally doing

you were only caught by,,, guess who

mrs iwaizumi

it was weeks when she met up with mrs oikawa bc theyre totally best friends and thats why their sons are best friends

she told her of her son’s girlfriend and how sweet you were and how mrs oikawa should be jealous that her son doesnt have a girlfriend like that and the standards for oikawa’s future girlfriend was raised just by that teasing

oikawa literally came into after school practice after a phone call with his mother, fuming

you were talking to kindaichi and yahaba with iwa beside you, arm around your waist totally not obvious guys

and yall just saw an angry oikawa stomping towards yall

‘y/n-chan, iwa-chan, why the hell did my mom just call me and tell me that im not allowed to bring home a girl if she doesnt have h/c with s/c (skin color) and e/c and h/m (height measurement)?’

you shrugged

‘oikawa-san, i’ve never even met your mom before’

but iwa had a hunch

‘ahh,,,, my mom mustve been bragging to your mom. yanno how they are’

oikawa shot him a disbelieving look

‘IWA-CHAN! ITS BAD ENOUGH THAT YOU GOT A GIRLFRIEND AND I DONT! BUT ITS WORSE THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS AFFECTING MY FUTURE ONE!’

he ranted, completely unaware that he just outed your entire relationship to the team

tbh they werent even surprised

like they were all ‘damn now shes taken. but cant say i didnt see that coming’

they took it pretty well too

they know how iwa is and they literally respect this mans and if anything, out of the whole team, he is the best candidate for your boyfriend

dating iwa is totally normal and yall just have increased touches?? like i dont know how to explain like he’s constantly holding your hand or arm around your waist or shoulder etc

literally nothing changed

you still have dinners at his house and iwa also knows your family and all that

and the most important thing is,

he kept that promise

even when he was literally at the other side of the world,

he still remained yours and you kept your own promise and waited patiently for his return

OOOOO TIMESKIP IWAIZUMI HAJIME (27) ATHLETE TRAINER

a little girl with bouncing dark brown hair was giggling as she maneuvered herself around the tall people

a shout from her parents and little sister was only making her run faster until she crashed into the legs of the person she’s been looking for

his blue jersey was similar to hers and she raised her arms up with a bright smile

‘uncle!’

she yelled and he chuckled before hoisting her up to his arms

‘ah, reyna-chan, didnt mom and dad tell you to wait for them? look! tala-chan is crying because you left her’

she followed his finger to her little sister, who was in her father’s arms, crying and reaching out for her

‘nee-chan!’

she screeched

finally, her parents were there and you were scolding her for running off

‘reyna, just dont do that again’

you said and she nodded, pouting and holding her uncle’s thumb

‘thank you, tooru-san. i dont know what i would do if she got lost’

oikawa grinned then gently patted the hat-covered head of the newborn baby girl that was strapped to your chest

‘hehe, its okay, y/n-chan. after all! uncle is always there to save reyna-chan!’

she shrieked when he held her up and hajime shook his head in his antics

‘where’s the others? i saw them in the stands but-’

he was cut off when he heard the shouts and yells from the other side that could only belong to your boys

‘woooo!!!!’

kindaichi’s voice echoed through the place and mattsuhana were rushing to greet their goddaughters

tala shyly accepted the arms of mattsun while makki was squealing quietly when darna was holding his finger tightly as she slept

‘taka-san, wanna hold her? she’s easier to hold when she’s sleeping’

‘oh can i?’

his eyes held the stars as the 11-month-old raised her fist then lowered it back down, sleep still heavy on her

‘waaa~ darna-chan is growing really quickly’

kunimi whispered, peering over his senpai to look at the baby whos eyes kept fluttering

you chuckled while looking at oikawa and him playfully bouncing reyna

‘tooru-san, congratulations on your win. it seems you’ve beaten hajime this time’

you complimented and the brunette smiled brightly at you, adjusting the little girls in his arms

‘ei, y/n-chan, i’ll beat him next time, and next time and the next time!’

every time he said ‘next’ he gave his goddaughter a kiss on her cheek making her giggle

your husband was pouting at the reminder of japan’s loss and you reached over to wrap your arms around him causing hajime to turn his head away from you

‘aww, my 4th baby is sad now’

you cooed and cupped his face delicately on your hands making him sulk and whine

the others, watching the scene, continue to be surprised at this side of their captain that remains to only be caused by you

‘ugh, nearly a decade later and theyre still sappy’

yahaba gagged and watari slapped his back

‘let them be happy’

‘come on! im in the mood for spaghetti! you like spaghetti, tala-chan?’

‘eung!’

mattsun cheered with kindaichi and she raised her hands to share the same energy

once everyone was situated in a restaurant and ordered, small talks were shared around the table of the past

‘haha, spaghetti is how your baba found out about you, tala-chan’

yahaba’s comment made the walking group laugh at the memory of seeing the video you sent in the seijoh group chat

‘i wanted to be creative with my second child since my firstborn was revealed by this loudmouth’

oikawa winced at the indirect diss at him

‘y/n-chan! i was really excited to find out i was going to be an uncle!’

‘youre already an uncle, bakakawa!’

hajime has toned down the insults to keep it pg for the children

‘but-!’

they started to argue, the oldest daughter looking disinterested as she sees this happening or hearing it whenever her dad and uncle video chat

‘it took me forever to find a ‘prego’ pasta sauce in the grocery store like i dont know why. was there a shortage?’

you complained, remembering the frustration

your fellow first years snickered at you and kindaichi prodded fun at you

‘is that why you just outright told him you were pregnant the day you found out?’

you rolled your eyes and watched makki and mattsun and tala watch the youngest as she wiggled her fists in the air and was awake enough to babble ‘makki’ over and over again

that was her first word and although she is now able to say a few words, she still repeats her first word over and over again

‘we had a fight and it just came out so of course i didnt have time to prepare!’

you defended and hajime finished his antics with oikawa just as you said that

‘what-what was your words again? ‘i really want to push you off the roof right now but i want my baby to meet their bastard father first?’‘

you gasped at that regretful statement and punched him in the arm

‘hajime! stop!’

you whined and covered your face with the sleeves of your his hoodie

‘hehe, y/n, you should do that again’

kyotani teased and you glared at him

‘shut up kyotani’

eyebrows were raised

‘eh? are you more hormonal?’

‘do you realize you already have 3 daughters?’

‘iwaizumi-san really wants to have a volleyball team family’

‘at least wait a year and a half, you animals’

‘so,, like hes that good huh?’

hajime growled and leaned over to intimidate but you snarled and jumped on your feet, being held back by the arms by kindaichi and hajime to stop yourself from leaping across the table to kill yahaba

‘keep talking like shite and i’ll make sure none of you become the godfather of this baby’

okay what

one, did you just curse

and two, this baby?!

‘im big sister again?!’

reyna ruined the surprised silence and then chaos ensued

‘WHAT!’

‘BABY?!’

‘THIS BABY?!’

you just realized what you said and smirked at the chaos you created and sat back down, leaning on the back of the chair and smugly taking a sip of your water

‘oh the power i hold in my hands’

you teased and oikawa pointed at you

‘when! how long!’

you looked at hajime who was so shocked that his eyes glazed over and a passerby wouldve thought he was dead

‘apparently 3 months’

oikawa started counting and his eyes widened at that thought

‘you-! you stayed in argentina! in my house! my house-!’

‘yep. both of them created under your house’

what

!!!!!

hajime fainted

oikawa screamed

a/n: okay i admit i got a little too carried away with this one. i just love filo!iwa and this was mostly written in his pov bc cmon we all know we love iwa and fell in love w him the moment we saw him

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princeanxious · 3 years ago

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Is it possible to buy yellow cotton gloves? 👀

But get a crooked staff! It would be so much fun! And if you have siblings/housemates it is fun to bop them (gently) with such things :D

Mmm this is true!! but i have no idea if the lotion would ruin them if i got a pair? Its about the dye reacting to it after all, even if it was professionally done. (But goodness if it is feasible? I'm def gonna look into getting some yellow, black, purple, and green gloves because 👀👀👀👀 COLORS)

Winter and work have been so mean to my hands and theyre constantly dried out, and bc my skin sucks it gets damaged rly easily, like fully scabbed cuts that take over 2 weeks to heal from just minor scrapes(like, anywhere from a paper/cardboard cut to a tiny sharp piece of metal that accidentally caught me to a cat paw trying to play that didnt even draw blood) that have literally left visible scarring months after they finally healed.

This weakness also extends to my skin's inability to make actual callousing that would prevent some of these cuts/damage, bc the skin under any forming callous isnt strong enough to hold it I guess? Add in dry skin and thus a piece will catch and i will lose the callous and have a new, even weaker patch skin exposed than before. Its never really gorey or even a wound, just. Annoyingly tender.

Now add constantly washing hands bc i work in retail and the fact that i have currently flaring eczema that hates the work soap(working on that, trust me) and im applying hydrating lotion about 5 times a shift when i remember to do so but can't apply too much bc i work with clothing- just. Bleh. Yknow?

Hense me just breaking down and getting cotton gloves to wear during the day. Bc nothing i apply sticks long enough to do anything and my hands are just getting worse Dx

As for the crook, i'd actually probably use it for support in walking xD but gently bonking my siblings and herding my cats out of things with it would also be very useful xD

#luka answers #lovely anons #luka rambles #im like 99% positive alot of my issues stem from a big vitamin deficiency at this point that could be from food intolerances??#or something to that degree but like. i obviously dont know what and im honestly in the Worst position atm to try and find out #bc my health insurance doesnt work in this state so if i wanna see any medical professional i gotta go out of state Every Time #just going to the dentist took up nearly all of my sick days and some points even last year alone due to alot of work being done #bc i literally had to drive 3 hours one way to see the people who had been working on my teeth b4 i moved states.#i hate american healthcare.#delete later #cw l0ng post

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babysizedfics · 4 years ago

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Poor roman :( but that being said I am heka interested in 5

remus humiliates roman in front of jamal (but jamal is a sweetheart)

vote from this concept voting post!

TWs: swearing, emotional humiliation, arguing, remus is generally pretty mean in this - not "unsympathetic" but his behaviour is not ok, brief alcohol mention but it isnt a main feature

first some background info on remus and ro:

roman and remus' friend groups actually run parallel to each other by pure councidence in that theyre the same age and are both in the local queer scene

usually they only run into each other on nights out and avoid each other like the plague... until one of romans friends and one of remus' friends become a very serious couple and the friendship groups merge

remus tends to hang it over romans head whenever they argue or remus just feels like teasing him that he could so so easily spill romans secret littlespace to all his friends

and while roman claims to not care he also really doesnt want that to happen, especially the specific things remus threatens to reveal (namely him calling his cgs mommy and daddy, and his fear of the dark - which remus knows are romans biggest embarrassments)

and remus never USUALLY actually follows through on his threats, he loves to freak roman out but he doesnt mean to be intentionslly cruel.

but one night theyve had an argument recently and remus is out to hurt roman and finally follows through on his threat to reveal romans secrets. in front of jamal

((the actual incident below the cut))

all the friends are walking back from a night out, and remus hangs back from the group to talk to jamal. roman is just glaring at remus and not saying anything and holding jamals hand tightly. remus hasnt embarrassed him too bad so far, just asking jamal questions and referring to roman as his "baby brother" which is so annoying, but the thing is roman can tell hes building up to something

then suddenly remus smirks when he sees a completely pitch black side street thats theyre about to pass by, and he calls out to everyone "hey guys, there's a 24/7 mcdonalds through here and its a shortcut to the bus stop" and everyones like WOO mcdonalds and redirects to go down the side street

and romans heart pounds watching the friends all filter down the street without a second thought, theres no streetlights down there, theres light on the other side quite far away, but before that its SO DARK. and he freezes in place and jamal is tugged back by it and looks back at him. "babe, come on"

romans starting to feel shaky and he literally cant move his feet. his eyes flick between the street and remus' sadistic cocky smirk.

"whats wrong baby bro? you stuck or something?" remus leers with that stupid stupid smirk

and roman HATES him so so much

"ro, what's the matter?" jamal asks

"i- um," roman stutters, trying to keep his voice from shaking too much at the sight of his friends just having DISAPPEARED into the darkness - how are they okay with that?? "i- im not hungry"

"okay well i am, and remus said it was a shortcut anyway so-"

"i-i -- no i can't"

seraphina, romans best friend, looks back and notices whats happening and quickly jogs over (knowing roman is scared of the dark) "hey roma, it's okay we dont have to go down there" she soothes

jamal is supportive but he doesnt get it. he thinks roman is scared of criminals or smth. "i promise theres no one bad down there, hun. and i'll be right next to you the whole time, i'll protect you" and he smiles and tugs romans hand to pull him towards the side street

romans eyes quickly tear up and he panics and rambles "nononono dont please please i cant i cant" in a broken voice and plants his feet firmly on the ground, paralysed with fear

remus starts cackling "ohhhhh thats right~" as if he just remembered. "my baby brother's terrified of the dark, isn't he?"

"f*ck off, re" sera barks, standing between the twins, protective of roman

"wait, are you?" jamal asks sounding surprised. roman doesnt let himself look at him, too busy watching remus warily and knowing thats not all he has planned to embarrass roman

remus goes on, shouting out to jamal over sera's head "he's petrified!" he confirms sounding delighted. "yknow that massive blackout last summer? he cried like a baby. literally sobbing for his daddy patton to make it go away"

theres a brief silence because no, sera and jamal didnt expect remus to refer to patton as romans daddy - they both know roman calls him dad but this is a surprise.

and that one second of silence drags on for ages for roman, all he can hear is his heart pounding in his ears and remus' obnoxious laughter

he is shaking, frozen in shock rather than fear now. for all of remus' teasing threats at home, he didnt expect remus to actually do it. hes devastated and humiliated that remus told to his best friend and especially his BOYFRIEND of all ppl

and honestly he's not even thinking about the pitch black side street right now because the streetlights on the main road are blurred by tears welling in his eyes anyway

"why dont you just leave him alone!" sera hisses furiously after her mild shock

then jamal bounces back rlly stern to remus "yeah i already know about that! roman told me and it was HIS choice to tell me"

roman stares at him in disbelief but jamal is too busy staring daggers at remus to notice

remus looks suddenly offended and frowns. hes clearly hurt that the others dont think its funny "jeez youre both such bores. im just having some fun"

"youre demented if you think thats fun" seraphina growls and shoves remus away towards the sidestreet. remus rolls his eyes and runs ahead to join the others who are all oblivious to that coversation, howling with drunken laughter in the pitch black and jumping out and scaring each other

"f*cking prick" jamal calls after remus, seething

sera quickly throws a concerned look to roman "you okay?"

roman just swallows thickly and looks between seraphina and where he saw remus join the others in the pitch black. his stomach churns at the idea of remus telling more people. "i-is he gonna--"

"im on it" sera nods and starts turning around "i wont let him tell anyone else, roma, promise" then she runs ahead to keep an eye on remus and to give him and jamal some privacy

after a moment jamal turns back to roman looking so worried and holds his hands and asks very gently "babe, can you tell me how youre feeling?"

and roman is teary but he whispers "i - you stuck up for me"

jamal looks suddenly sad and cups romans cheek "of course i did"

"but you said i told you about it. i- i didnt tell you that i-" roman gulps after his voice wobbles "i didnt tell you about it"

and jamal smiles sadly and goes "i know babe... im sorry, i just didnt wanna give him any more power. it seemed like he's held that over you for a while"

suddenly the tears in romans eyes overspill and he doesnt really know why but he can't stop them

jama gasps a little "oh roman, its ok" and just pulls him into a tight hug

roman clings and sniffles, glad that he can hide his tears from his boyfriend even if it is in his neck.

and jamal just strokes his back and whispers "its ok baby, its ok" **

they talk about it quietly as they take the longer, well-lit route instead. roman admits he would never have told jamal abt his fear on his own - and the reason he's been avoiding staying overnight at jamals apartment is bc the one time he did he got so scared of the dark that he couldnt sleep and was just anxious all night but wouldnt wake jamal to tell him

after jamal finds out hes like baby why didnt u tell me its okay and comforts him about it not being embarrassing or childish. then:

"so you do actually want to stay at mine, its just because its so dark that you didnt?"

roman nods shyly "yeah... im sorry i know its a dumb fear i just-"

"its not dumb ro. i meant to say if it works for you, we could leave the hall light on and the door open. its not like i live with anyone who can walk in."

roman blinks "wait you - really? it wont make it hard for you to sleep?"

jamal smiles softly "no hun, honestly i could sleep anywhere. i fell asleep in the middle of the day in the staffroom just last month"

roman laughs, so so so relieved

"so... maybe next time you come over for dinner you could stay the night, yeah?" jamal says with a smile and a blush. he wraps his arm around romans waist and pulls him in, hip to hip

roman bites his lip and blushes. after a moment he suggests shyly "im free tonight..."

and jamal smiles so big, stops walking and puts his arm up to romans chest to stop him too then angles romans jaw down to kiss him

in the near future jamal promises to buy a plain nightlight and always leaves it on for roman when he stays overnight from then on

**side note: roman could never stand anyone calling him baby before because he felt infantilised at school becaus of his undiagnosed adhd. so he sees it as a derogatory name more than anything. but when jamal says it roman feels so warm and respected because he knows jamal would never mean it in that way. so jamal has "baby" rights basically

#swearing tw #little angst #long post #chaotic cousin remus #little/big concepts #asks #tumblebee the smol bean

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smalltragedy · 4 years ago

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* justice smith, demi man + he/they | you know gabriel de leon, right? they’re twenty three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, six years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 1984 (infinite jest) by the used like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole waking up in a body as heavy as the dead, emotions always on the verge of spilling over - you laugh before the punch lands, the belief that every encounter you have will be the last thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )

hi im just reposting gabe’s intro bc its been a very long time n im starting a little fresh hehe. yes i do regret the text color bt im not going back.

VIOLENCE TW

mini playlist.

ghosting ;; mother mother / roam the room ;; citizen / art of doubt ;; metric / thnks fr th mmrs ;; fall out boy / heart in a cage ;; the strokes / where is my mind? ;; the pixies / flowers grow out of my grave ;; dead man’s bones / 1984 (infinite jest) ;; the used / blister in the sun ;; the violent femmes.

statistics.

full name: gabriel de leon.

nickname(s): gabe.

birthday: october 31st, 1997.

zodiac: scorpio sun, scorpio moon, gemini ascending.

label: the icarian.

hometown: belleville, new jersey.

sexuality: bisexual (masc-leaning).

pinterest.

biography.

it’s only rly ever been gabe n his mom n the little new jersey suburbs that r always the same no matter where they go. they dn’t speak abt fathers or brothers or spain or anywhere other than the now, and how its constantly changing bt oddly the same.

his mom’s name is sonia n we love her. she worked a lot as a single mom n p much hs done everything on her own ever since leaving spain.

they dn’t talk abt spain bt we cn talk abt spain n hw sonia hd grown up partially there n partially in the states n hw she’d originally planned to live there forever bt the man she’d fallen in love with ws involved in some. high class dangerous shit n it ws safer fr them to part even if tht involved leaving everything she knew n loved <3

bt its like. ok. bc she hd gabe <3 n they dnt talk abt it so it practically nvr happened. n she tries her best as a mom n usually tht is enough.

they moved around a lot just bc sonia is a very. flighty person. anxious bt nvr seems tht way is just always. tense. gabe didnt think she ws capable of relaxing fr. a rly long time.

she wld commute 2 nyc every morning n after school gabe wld climb onto the train n by the time he got 2 her place of work she’d be just getting off n they’d get a slice of pizza n sometimes they’d go somewhere like central park or coney island (just fr the novelty) bt most of the time they just got back on the train home w/ gabe either doing homework or napping on her shoulder.

when gabe got a little older he’d sometimes skip school n take the train after sonia had already gone so he cld spend the day in nyc. he liked learning bt didnt rly like school. he nvr properly fit in bc of the amt of times they’d move so it felt like nowhere ws. right fr him.

got rly involved in. the punk scene as a young unsupervised teenager n tht led 2 a lot of like. shitty stick n pokes bt also a love of. very loud angry music n a sense of justice tht he held tightly in his fists. got mouthy towards bullies whether at school or in the scenes he involved himself in n started getting into a lot of fights bc of it.

during this, sonia ended up dating n marrying gabe’s stepdad who he calls craig sometimes bt i dnt think thats his name i wont lie to u guys. its partially a joke n partially purposeful disrespect bc gabriel does not trust a single man bt like. man. ‘craig’ is just an accountant. he’s fine he’s a good dude. they once bonded over like. the mets.

violence tw // anyways. when gabriel ws 16 he got into a super super bad fight tht ended rly. terribly n like listen. nobody died bt it ws just. it got blown up very out of proportion n gabe might’ve gotten expelled even tho he wsnt even the one who started it bt thts okay. ‘craig’, or paul, suggested tht maybe. a change of scenery wld b good fr gabe n b4 they knew it they were. moving to paul-robert’s hometown of irving, north carolina. violence end of tw //

he wld’ve complained more bt. fr sonia’s sake gabe kept it 2 himself. it made her happy 2 see them all get along anyways n like. idk he cld put forth tht little effort <3

bt honestly like. he didnt rly get into too many fights once they moved down here n even tho sometimes he ws like. ommgg. i hate this town .. its so washed up .. he still made friends n like. the only thing tht changed ws tht it ws a lil harder fr him 2 acquire illegal substances.

anyways. currently he hs a tattoo apprenticeship n is a professional piercer n like. he plays guitar n writes songs bt thts more of a hobby rn than anything else. mostly focused on paying his rent at port apartments bc as much as he. loves his mom he does not want 2 live with her forever <3 n thts okay!

personality & facts.

overall xtremely passionate person like god. feels emotions so intensely. every time he opens his mouth n talks abt an interest of theirs its just very like. u listen n ur like oh. gained 2 inspiration. thanks.

clings onto his friends p tightly bc he like. nvr rly stayed in one place fr super super long in new jersey so he nvr made very long term friends n now hes like. very clingy HLKDSHLKFSHLKDG also hates to b alone. subtle desperation behind interactions with ppl he rly wld like to be friends with.

like dnt get me wrong hes gotten into. sm fights bt thts mostly bc he cannot keep his mouth shut n he also cnt stand douchebags he like. always wants to tear them down prob bc he ws a victim of bullying. n u know what. we support him. otherwise he loves ppl bt esp if they hv similar interests 2 him.

like golden retriever who bites kind of. intensely loyal but at the same time is very skeptical. things tht good things do not last very long even though they’ve been doing already fr the last few years.

also bit of a nerd. they were nvr rly a big fan of school bt theres smth abt a good superhero comic tht draws their attention more than like. any english class evr. bt seven soldiers of victory? classic. big dc fan.

uh. very into like. hardcore music. hardcore rock. punk. if its loud n angry they r into it like so so much. hs sm tattoos is like. super covered in them its partially bc they work at a tattoo shop n partially bc they do not know hw to manage their money well.

ooohh u know what theyre. kinda moody i wont lie to u. very defensive like they dnt evr wna talk abt their past. has experienced Things n they do not wish to discuss them. will usually like. deflect frm conversations he doesnt wna hv.

in tune with nature. loves fkn taking walks. hangs out in the woods by abernathy creek n lilac ridge bc nobody rly goes there n its just. nice

tries not 2 take anything super seriously 2 the point where when he does take smth seriously its a little scary bc theyre super intense abt it. forcibly optimistic even tho on the inside he feels like a total pessimist. lots of. deep down insecurities tht he projects by attaching himself p firmly onto others. >.>

so so so energetic. can never stay still. always hs to be moving around. restless like tht. probably got it frm his mom. overly protective over the ppl he loves. probably got it frm his mom as well.

goes onto Tangents bt also divert frm those tangents n is generally all over the place.

always cold n always looks tired n like he hsnt slept in a thousand years n u know what. sometimes he just does not sleep.

oooohh theyre a vegan. totally into animal rights. devious little demi man beyond that .. loves horror n the paranormal n believes in like. every cryptic. will debate u on it.

erm not. the kindest 2 themself theyre a bit self destructive. impulsive. drives very fast n parties super hard. said i will hv my effy stonem moment. u dont hv to gabe.

bt ya! luvs oranges n reds n is maybe a short king. hs an eyebrow piercing n like. a lip ring i wont fk around here he IS living his best emo life in 2021. a little outdated on the trends bt thats okay. probably will tell u hes frm new jersey. its a personality trait. smokes the shittiest cigarettes ever.

wanted plots.

just ghosting along ,, dnt even exist 2 me ,, ;; god. firstly just the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs like. spoken to romantically n then dropped suddenly. n then maybe like. one tht actually Hurt bt they cnt avoid each other bt theyre actively pretending each other doesnt exist n its. hurtful bc it ws like. actually smth nice bt <3 ykno FKLFSDHG

hey hey heyy c’maahn i’m just a little guy ;; n this is the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs probably. pissed off n hs either fought or been on the verge of fighting just. unable 2 resist a good bicker-turned-duel.

just blistering in the sun ;; they cld b close friends bt also they cld also not b bt just ppl who. indulge in bad impulsive decisions with gabe. general bad influences on each other’s health n just. no good! party hard bt at what cost.

n also ;; like ... rly solid good friendships ... flings n maybe an exe or two tht either ended on good terms or just. horrendous, ppl they’ve distanced frm, ppl also frm up north, piercing customers, bt not tattoo customers bc im p sure they’d get fired if they were just tattoo’ing ppl willy nilly, etc.

#irvingintro #violence tw #(more of a brief mention)#bt still #jst reposting bc its been so long JFGDHFDSGSLFKG

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unironicduncanstan · 4 years ago

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[UNI’S LPS LORE DROP BITCH]

so ,,, i used to collect littlest pet shop (mostly the 1st and 2nd gen ones bc yall i am old) and theyre long gone now but. these are some of the lps i remember playing with and giving distinct personalities growing up. most of them didnt have names at all so im just referring to them with numbers and pictures. also warning it gets pretty Dark bc weird kid culture but here we go;;;

the first is #11 and #86. they were my absolute FAVORITES, a mother and daughter duo, a lot of their stories revolved around the kitten getting lost and the mom having to get to her, or the kitten dying and the mom having a mental breakdown. 11 mostly acted as a single mom but sometimes id cycle out different potential dads, usually the dog lps bc i did Not care abt the actual scientific lack of interspecial breeding possibilities

#25. a basic white picket fence ass dude, really common choice as the ‘dad’ in the above situation, he also was not immune to being ‘killed off’ for angst. was also cheated on a couple times by 11 (THOSE WERE AUS THO,,, DONT CANCEL HER ITS OK TO KEEP STANNING)

#200. she was #11s best friend, I think her name might have been hannah??? anyways if the mom and dad were killed off sometimes she’d “adopt” #86. but usually only after #86 fell into the custody of a terribly neglectful parent for a while and had to be rescued bc again, in my gay neurodivergent little brain peace was never an option

#487. another love interest for #11, usually competed with #25 in an almost edward vs jacob type battle of cool brooding boy and average mcfamily man. he was a big fav

#672. number #487s sister! usually either helped him get #11 like a wingman, or i’d flip the cards and make her manipulative and sabotage 11 bc she didnt think she was good enough for her brother. the personality switches id give characters were rly like. getting the bad ending in a video game,

#44. YET ANOTHER,, LOVE INTEREST FOR THAT ONE CAT,,,, but it was one sided and he always lost. poor friend zone ass simp im sorry man idk why you deserved that 😔 i think sometimes though id pair him with #200/hannah at the end. cant get the girl date her best friend idk i was 8 my morals were not always applicable to the adult situations i created

#14. SO I,,,, i ended up with three of these. and in the end i made them triplets that performed for the circus and were unhappy in their life of exploitation. i think sometimes they would. form a sui pact to escape their torment.

#137. HIS NAME WAS FUCKEN CHEESE

Groovy goat / unnumbered. I remember she was spanish to me but spoke mostly english, this decision was made bc i was an extremely white american child, and she was almost always involved somehow in a story bc she was my favorite design ever. anyways she usually was a model that would give a struggling lps a ‘makeover’ like that one scene in any dramatic disney live action film ever made

#464. another fav bc of her design omg. she was like a little sweetheart and would often play the role of ‘baby’ for any species i didnt already have designated ‘babies’ for. BUT, when i’d play with the other hamsters (we’ll get 2 them in a sec), i made them all the same age and theyd all crush on her at the same time lmao the DRAMA

#34, #35, #36. they were brothers and in order from left to right;;; biggest brother and a leader+positive role model, then the punkish middle brother that didnt like to listen and would often get them all in trouble, then the youngest nerdy brother that was naive and soft and did w/e he was told. they stuck together thru all their antics, except when #464 was involved, then theyd have a classic ‘fighting over a girl then realizing thats ridiculous’ arc. rly loved these guys cuz i always wanted a hamster so id pretend they were real animals sometimes too loL

#693. i got thsi in a mcdonalds happy meal but anyways she was a princess/queen/whatever and was very spoiled royalty. probably tried to behead some of the other lps idk. all she wanted was drama and money

#112. punk boy,,, usually paired with one of the ‘popular’ girls,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, oh my god did i government assign this dog duncan kin b4 td even existed yet

#48, #79 #42. !! HUGE FUCKEN BITCH ALERT !! (popular girls trio lol), i think a couple times i like, aged down #11 and got rid of the kitten for a ~highschool au~ where these girls bullied her but she ofc ended up stealing the middle ones man. and then other times i just paired the middle girl with #112 in a genuine ‘opposites attract’ ship . where were u guys when i was making duncney lps a thing tbh

#59. i love this guy but he was just an eccentric dork and mostly used for comedic effect

#43. love interest for #59 that he goofily fawned over till he eventually got the girl at the end of every story bc i loved cliches

#673. usually a mysterious adventurous girl from out of town that meets the mains in my story and befriends them/helps them out. also a close friend of the groovy goat character

“Paws off diary” Bull Terrier. ok this ones weird but he came in this lil electronic diary right (you can google how it looks to see what i mean) and there was this like, plastic bubble on top that he came in and you could stick him or any other lps in there and shut it securely cuz it was a diary so i. used it as like. a prison almost where id trap lps and the other characters had to ‘save’ them like they were rescuing a princess from a tower or smth. but it was usually just this lil guy. also he was given a name but i was kinda cheating skjdfsdf it was, “Max” bc that was always his name in the commercials for the diary--

#646 and #647, twin orphans separated at birth. did a lot of princess and the pauper esque ‘long lost siblings from different worlds’ reunion stories with these two

#94. so this one came with a head bandage and a little medical looking case to carry them in. i used the carry case as like an ‘ambulance’ or med helicopter to put ‘sick’ pets in and carry them to the hospital, and this pet had chronic illness so they were always the roommate patient at the lps hospital.

#10 and #142, the goldfish couldnt be taken out of the bowl if i remember correctly so. he felt sad and isolated but the seahorse was his best friend who was able to go anywhere so id stick him in the bowl with him a lot to hang out n make him feel better. solidarity

#463. i LOVED her design, so i used her a lot as just a friend to whoever i was playing with. she was also one of the bigger birds so shes the only one i remember really utilizing as a ‘this character can literally fly’ plot device. she also might have been magic i dont remember. ik whenever i did the circus story she was always in it

#37, #38 and #39. i lost the ‘girl’ one early on, like completely lost it and never found it again so idk what happened to it. so the story was the other two were brothers in a constant search for their long lost sister. sometimes id either have another lps be their sister or make a ‘found family’ trope out of somebody

#331. i had two of these and they come with little hats but i lost one of the hats so. evil twin story babey the regular one was a nice old pirate guy but the one with the hat was evil and nobody could ever tell the difference

#641, IM THE TRASH MAN! I START EATIN GARBAGE,

#long post #i had many more but these were my muses #original

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tornsuits · 3 years ago

Note

Big Ask Pt. 2: 1) Would CG!Heracles or Oedipus consider asking Ashes about rebodying their family/wife? 2) "all the suits are neurodivergent"--you're probably right, and also pls elaborate. 3) Do you have any UDAD ships for the characters other than Orpheus, Eurydice, Narcissus, and Echo? 4) screw it: each of the individual Suits (as in the pinstripe 4+Ulysses+Daedalus) for the "realistic headcanon/haha funny headcanon/sad headcanon/my canon now" thing?

1) i think heracles might ask for them to be rebodied, but probably keep his distance from them, bc he did like. kill them. & he wants them to have an opportunity to get away from that, if they want to.

oedipus does not revive his family, because he hates them <2

2) theyre all autistic. all of em. & at least orpheus and heracles have depression (w orpheus it's basically canon) & i mean. all of them have been through so much shit that even if they're not traumatized per se they're definitely fucked in the head

3) i wouldn't say that i actively ship it, but i do enjoy heracles/oedipus on occasion <3 i'm also a sucker for ariadne & arachne having ANY kind of relationship, so i guess i'd say i ship them? girlboss4girlboss yknow

there's also ulysses/galahad but we don't talk about that one

4) will be under the cut bc that's gonna get long!

heracles

realistic headcanon: gay for hylus lmao. i didn't include that as a ship bc i haven't pinned down any kind of solid hcs for hylus but heracles was 100% gay for him

haha funny headcanon: hes lived on this godforsaken city for 124 years and he still has to do the Ls to tell left from right

sad headcanon: hes kind of tied all of his self-worth 2 his physical strength & athletic abilities at this point, so he feels like if people don't need/appreciate his skills hes basically useless :( which is part of the reason he played along with zeus for so long, because it just made him feel wanted

my canon now: he never killed his wife n kids they're alive and well and were waiting for him when he got home from the ulysses job <3

ariadne

realistic headcanon: shes aro!! doesnt use any other sexuality labels just aro <3 also demigirl ariadne supremacy bay bee

haha funny headcanon: in general she's not great in combat EXCEPT for with a garrote. people tend to underestimate her and then she pulls out this small piece of wire and they start REALLY underestimating her and then she cuts their head off

sad headcanon: i think she was actually really close with daedalus :( she stuck with him well after he started being Really Evil, just bc she refused to accept that the one good person she'd grown up with was Bad Actually

my canon now: beat the shit out of theseus and now she has actually good friends (even though she prefers working alone most of the time, which is okay bc they respect her boundaries <3)

oedipus

realistic headcanon: hes a smart guy :] no caveats here i just think hes a very smart dude w a special interest in the sphinx virus

haha funny headcanon: he says "stand back, i'm a doctor" even in situations where it doesn't apply at all. trying to cut in line? "stand back, i'm a doctor." threatening someone trying to hurt him? "stand back, i'm a doctor." someone specifically told him not to say he was a doctor? "stand back, i'm a doctor (and also fuck you)"

sad headcanon: when he was a kid he really wanted to go to space... he genuinely thought there was something up there, something he could study, yknow? and he still wants to go to space, now he just knows there's nothing up there.

my canon now: he and brian are friends i think both of them deserve it

orpheus

realistic headcanon: [points] emo phase. this "man" has emo phase written all over him. i don't know what else to say here he just 100% had an emo phase

haha funny headcanon: has a huge amount of useless trivia kicking around in his head. the suits go anywhere and orpheus can tell them the top ten facts they did not know about this place. number five will surprise you (he does not know anything practical about it)

sad headcanon: i mean canon does most of the heavy lifting for me there BUT i think he gets really horrible nightmares :( he's pretty much gotten used to waking up in the middle of the night crying and not being able 2 remember why :( i am not projecting be quiet

my canon now: he is living his best life with his husband eurydice and his boyfriend narcissus <333 they have a cat <333 also genderfluid orpheus so true

ulysses

realistic headcanon: theyre a nonbinary lesbian im actually not accepting criticism at this time

haha funny headcanon: when they're not horribly depressed they have the disposition of like, your weird grandparent that's mostly settled down now but got up to SO much shit in their youth. ulysses vc come bake cookies with me and i'll tell you about the murder i committed in '89

sad headcanon: again canon just does all of the hard work for me here. i think they died right on top of their wife maybe <3

my canon now: honestly okay i WANT to say they got therapy and a nice pet dog after udad but honestly i think they'd just be happier dead LMAO

daedalus

oh i could not give less of a shit about this man. i hate him. hes homophobic and gay and figured out how mechanization works and that's all i have on him. i despise him

#alan don't look #OHKAY i will answer the third part of this ask tomorrow because i am EXHAUSTED #but ugh. all the suits my beloveda #*beloveds #jay says words #asks #lun4rcr0w

3 notes · View notes

kirimono · 4 years ago

Text

bnha secret identity au

a while back (like over a year ago) some friends and i were talking about a bnha au where theyre more classic Teen Superheroes With Secret Identities. that chatlog is under the cut.

ShriekingSisterhood

BAKUGO WOULD NEVER COMPLIMENT AN HERO BESIDES HIMSELF, EVEN IF HIS IDENTITY WAS SECRET

dataghost

lmfao yeah

cassetticon

bakugous identity would only be secret for like 5 minutes

starsinger

jsdfidksbgj

fuck

ShriekingSisterhood

Someone: Idk ingenium is kinda shit

starsinger

thats. reayyly funny to contemplate actually

cassetticon

"WOW KING OF EXPLODOKILLS WHOS THAT SOUNDS LIKEA COOL GUY"

dataghost

exactly like the end of iron man

ShriekingSisterhood

Bakugo emerging from a nearby dumpster: ye totally but you know whos the fucking coolest LORD EXPLOSION MURDE

cassetticon

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

In secred id au everyone knows bakugos id

not even bc he bragged about it or anything hes just his own #1 fan

cassetticon

yeah

starsinger

also he cant hide his hair

ShriekingSisterhood

WHAT IF HIS CITIZEN DISGUIZE IS HIS BEST JEANIST HAIR

cassetticon

holy fuck

dataghost

god hed just be. dead inside

ShriekingSisterhood

oh god, oh man, okay this might be dilly but

everyone in secret id au knows bakugo is lord explosion murder

)drmatic pause, lifts finger for effect)

except kirishima

cassetticon

WOW

starsinger

aughdshfjdfsdgh

cassetticon

YEAH,

ShriekingSisterhood

who is so fucking cursed

THAT HE HAS A CRUSH ON BOTH OF THEM

dataghost

oh nooooooooo

starsinger

HHAHAHAHAHAH OH NOOOOOOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

WITHOUT EVEN KNOWING THEY ARE THE SAME AWFUL BOY

starsinger

EYAYHH

cassetticon

SCREAMS

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima to his jock pal Uravity: I dunno like I like both of them so much like, I can't figure out which one to like, ask to punch me??

cassetticon

jesus

starsinger

haugh.

dataghost

god unfortch

cassetticon

ochako is trying very hard to figure out how to tell him

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: it's impossible to choose between them

dataghost

man bakugou is like . barely even disguised in his costume

and kirishima still has no clue

cassetticon

yeah thats the best part

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: I love them both equally but for different reasons

starsinger

spiff this is the worst

i love it

ShriekingSisterhood

EVEN ZAP BOY KNOWS

BUT NOT KIRISHIMA

starsinger

god. i want to see the HIJINKS

cassetticon

same. god

ShriekingSisterhood

bonus points if Bakugo honestly believes he has most people fooled

starsinger

kirishima accidentally schedules a study date with bakugou at the same time red riot has a training session with king of explodokills

ShriekingSisterhood

FUCK

cassetticon

screams

starsinger

i dont know how this happens. i could see kirishima doing it but i feel like bakugou keeps better track of his schedule than that but

cassetticon

i mean bakugou is also under the curse's thrall

dataghost

wait so does bakugou know kirishima is red riot

starsinger

did he get........... Flustered

ShriekingSisterhood

omg

starsinger

its funnier if no i think

but

ShriekingSisterhood

he got flustered

dataghost

i feel like bakugou knows like no one's secret identities because he just doesnt fucking care

starsinger

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

MAYBE HE THOUGHT KIRISHIMA WAS DOING IT ON PURPOSE

cassetticon

yeah

thats good

@ jane

ShriekingSisterhood

oh no i like that much better

he doesn't even fucking know

cassetticon

kirishima might be the only exception tho just bc of how obnoxious he is in and out of costume

ShriekingSisterhood

the only one he knows is deku and he hates that he knows it

cassetticon

wow yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

hes constantly trying to unknow it

dataghost

god

starsinger

wheich is really funny because, again, theres not even a DISGUISE COMPONENT to kirishimas costume

cassetticon

YEAH

HIS WHOLE FACE AND TORSO IS JUST OUT THERE

starsinger

YEAH FJKDFKJKJFD

ShriekingSisterhood

HIS ABS, OUT THERE

dataghost

okay i feel like in a real secret id au they would put SOME more efffort,

maybe he has a mask

cassetticon

i Guess so

but thats not as funy

ShriekingSisterhood

what if bakugo thinks tetsu tetsu is red riot

dataghost

but the abs are still Exposed

sdfllkfdajslkjsfdjlkfdsjlsfdl;kj

cassetticon

holy fuck

ShriekingSisterhood

bc he can't be assed to tell the hard boys apart

starsinger

bakugou finally figures it out when he finally sees kirishima shirtless when theyre at the gym

cassetticon

SCREAMS

ShriekingSisterhood

FUCK!!!

THIS IS THAT GOOD SHIT!!

cassetticon

HED KNOW THOSE ABS ANYWHERE

ShriekingSisterhood

BAKUGO GLANCING OVER AT HIS BRO WHILE THEY DO SOME CURLS IN THE GYM AND HIS CROP TOP RIDES UP AND BAKUGO'S WATER BOTTLE INSTANTLY BOILS AND EXPLODES

RIGHT IN HIS HAND

starsinger

i think the concept of 'its a secret identity au but that just means they slap a tiny domino mask on but it somehow works' is great. but so is the concept of 'they have their canon costumes with no fuckgin disguise components whatsoever but none of them know ANYWAY'

also concept tho: kirishima's superhero costume is his old emo makeup

dataghost

he just starts yelling at kirishima immediately and kirishima is just like "keep it DOWN we're in a PUBLIC GYM!!!! its supposed to be a secret!!!!! :("

ShriekingSisterhood

HFGDFH

cassetticon

holy shit vera

i love this

ShriekingSisterhood

okay but what if bakugo is like "if kirishima is red riot then he obviously figured out my secret identity way before all this"

cassetticon

i love ex-emogoth kirishima

starsinger

aAaaAAAHAHGHGH

cassetticon

OHHHH MY GOD

BAKUGOU JUST TAKES IT AS A GIVEN THAT KIRISHIMA KNWOS

ShriekingSisterhood

"How did he outsmart me, how did he figure it out"

KIRISHIMA DOESN'T KNOW A FUCKING THING MY GUY

dataghost

god what if bakugou assumes like. kirishima was doing study dates & stuff with him BECAUSE of his secret identity

starsinger

ghhh OD

ShriekingSisterhood

YEAH

cassetticon

im dying of thks

ShriekingSisterhood

"HE WAS SENDING ME A MESSAGE?? WAS IT A THREAT? A CHALLENGE"

starsinger

this is so ooo oo good

ShriekingSisterhood

NO, THIS HARD BOY IS JUST, A BIG MESS

OH MY GOD

WHAT IF,

kirishima: fuck now that bakugo knows im red riot what if he sees me flirting with lord explosion murder and gets pissed

dataghost

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

cassetticon

screams

starsinger

hhfdhdhfhfhHDFHFDHFHDHDFHDF

he stops flirting with lord explosion murder so much and bakugous like

pissed

ShriekingSisterhood

THE BOY IS SIMPLY TOO CURSED TO LIVE

cassetticon

god. yeah

bakugou: hes playing me like a fool again(edited)

dataghost

i mean we're assuming bakugou noticed the flirting in the first place

ShriekingSisterhood

kirishima, meanwhile a 100% genuine no playing about it fool ass fool

fuck, since bakugo thinks all interraction is rivalry

maybe he thinks like, kirishima no longer considers him an opponent or something??

cassetticon

oh. my god

yeah.

starsinger

yah its something like that

cassetticon

"you think youre too good for me now huh"

ShriekingSisterhood

so his pride is hurt, and also the deep subconscious tender part of him thats gay is hurt too

starsinger

he cant quite articulate his actual feelings hes just like

Pissed

dataghost

yeah

ShriekingSisterhood

Kirishima: (stops flirting)

Bakugo: I don't know what this is but i know how i feel about it: furious beyond articulation

starsinger

god i just thought about tsuyu for a second and im fdjkfdjfd

shes just a frog

ShriekingSisterhood

god,

starsinger

in both civilian and superhero forms. but its liek. no one thinks its weird

ShriekingSisterhood

good

dataghost

yeah sometimes youre just a frog, nbd

doesnt necessarily have anything to do with you being Popular Hero Froppy, nope

ShriekingSisterhood

sometimes 2 people are just frogs and that doesn't mean anything

maybe people assume tsuyu got into being a frog bc she likes Froppy

dataghost

just unrelatedly, frogs

starsinger

yeah! exactly

oh my god spiff

ShriekingSisterhood

and shes like (internally flustered) KERO

maybe its just like how there are, horse girls and dolphin girls in ever high school

dataghost

are you implying horse girls and dolphin girls are literally part horse & part dolphin in the bnha universe

ShriekingSisterhood

Is there are reason for them not to be

HEY THO... WHAT ABOUT THE BNHA STUDENTS LIKE GOSSIPING SUSPICIOUSLY... ABOUT THE FACT THAT THEY NEVER SEE ALL MIGHT SENSEI IN HIS CIVILIAN FORM

like, assuming the teachers/adults are open abt their secret identities at the school

they're like "we've seen everyone out of hero mode except all might.... does he not have a civilian life"

Deku: (sweating)

dataghost

all might is extra secretive bc he's so like...."Gotta Be The Symbol Of Peace!!! No one can know i am a real human EVER!!!!!!"

ShriekingSisterhood

Student sees Greeblin Might like: "Oh are u that zombie hero"

yes but also in my head its that, they expect civilian all might to be buff

theres no extremely fucking unbelieably buff guy roaming the halls or in the teachers lounge or in town or anything

dataghost

yeah but even before his injury maybe he was like,

projected a super-super image like superman, like ~im not a civilian when im not heoring i live in My Special Secret Lair~ or soemthing

starsinger

god now im thinking about the logistics of this and its SO FUNNY that like every superhero in the entire town is at taht school. either as a teacher or as a student

dataghost

what if its not even a hero school

its just a regular ass school but everyone just HAPPENS to go there

starsinger

oh yeah like superman being like 'oh yeah i live in the fortress of solitude at the north pole'

YEAH EXACTLY

dataghost

yeah yeha

ShriekingSisterhood

oh my god

All Might: I live in a fortress of solitude in the alps and no once can see it with eyes

dataghost

all-might trying to live his civilian life pre-injury when he was always buff is so funny then tho

people keep asking him if he's all might and he's like no! look my hair doesnt stick up!

starsinger

KJFDJSDG

GOD

ShriekingSisterhood

All Might, ten minutes later: (buying milk at the local grocery and fucking up the self checkout)

oh my god... secret buff all might is so good

its the superman glasses type effect

starsinger

'that cant be all might hes not smiling real big'

thats the extent of all mights acting skills

ShriekingSisterhood

maybe he gets a giant tshirt that says "pessimism" so no one can possibly identify him as a civillian

dataghost

sdaljkdjsakljlaksd

starsinger

akjsfjdjf

ShriekingSisterhood

"bad mood" t shirt

dataghost

i feel like he does a bunch of comics-type secret identity stuff to cover up his civilian id but its all super flimsy

like, obviously fake glasses, a shirt like that

maybe a fake mustache

starsinger

FDSDJKLFSDKJLKJL

NOOOOOO

cassetticon

and it all works

starsinger

ALL MIGHT WHIT A FAKE MUSTACHE IS AWFULLLL

dataghost

the glasses dont even have lenses theyre just a frame

cassetticon

he gets a mustache like mics bc he thinks its Cool

dataghost

its not even a blonde mustache. its like brown and OBVIOUSLY doesnt match his hair

everyone just assumes he dyes it

starsinger

he bought non-prescription glasses but one of the lenses got knocked out but he keeps wearing them

they have One Lens

dataghost

fsljdljdfs;jlfsd;

cassetticon

i love him

god

starsinger

ShriekingSisterhood

what if the mustache is attached to the glasses like groucho style

dataghost

(i thought for a second about nighteye being one of the first outside the One For All lineage to know all might's civilian id and . augh)

starsinger

god i was like 'ok i have to think about todoroki now' but now i have feelings and im lie k. Put It Back :arrow_lower_left: dot jpeg

augh jane

ShriekingSisterhood

phantom of the opera shit

thats todoroki's hero disguise

dataghost

there's a fake nose on the glasses too and it barely fits overhis actual nose

ShriekingSisterhood

actually hes just covered half in ice

starsinger

oh nevermind i remembered his caonn hero costume is like

ShriekingSisterhood

so thats fine

starsinger

a plumber suit

dataghost

a plumber

starsinger

post sports arc

dataghost

what if thats his civilian job

and he just doesnt change clothesx

starsinger

gadhdhfg

noooo

ShriekingSisterhood

what civilian job does all might have

maybe he pretends to be gran torino's home health aid

starsinger

if eel like he Didnt Have One until meeting izuku. true to canon

dataghost

i was like "office job" but then realized i was literally just thinking of mr incredible at the beginning of the incredibles

starsinger

at which point he became an absolutely awful teacher

dataghost

o h noooo

starsinger

ghjdkfujfj

ShriekingSisterhood

god,,,m wow

what does he ever teach if its not a hero school

PHYS ED

dataghost

omfg

ShriekingSisterhood

HES THE SCRAWNIEST GYM TEACHER OF ALL TIME

dataghost

vjlgsdjkldfskljfsjsfj;kf;sdkjfsdkdsk;jflk

he gives GREAT inspirational speeches tho

starsinger

hujks FUK

ShriekingSisterhood

BUT LIKE AT THE SAME TIME, HE CAN LIKE LIFT AN ENTIER POMMEL HORSE WITH ONE HAND

god

what if they don't even have a sports team

so theres no games to give relevant inspirational speeches at

so hes just like, doing them at random

when he sees an in

dataghost

just at the beginning of each class

or whenever The Mood Strikes

question: is class 1b at the same school or are they Rival Schools

ShriekingSisterhood

fuck,,, both are so good

dataghost

imagine Rival School Student Monoma sneaking into their school to ~infiltrate~

ShriekingSisterhood

i like rival schools

because monoma like, steals their mascot

and kendo brings it back

dragging him over to apologise

but also i love the idea of him trying to infiltrate his own fucking school

starsinger

the concept of 'rival schools but aslo they dont have sports teams' is SOOO good

mathletes competitions get REAL intense

ShriekingSisterhood

just because A1 got the better homeroom classroom

and he wants it

oh my god intense matheletes

starsinger

science olympiad. band and choir competions.

cassetticon

MARCHING BAND AU IM HERE

ShriekingSisterhood

I WAS ABOUT TO SAY, LEE SUMMON

starsinger

ok whats the funniest sport to have if you can only have One Sport at ur school

ShriekingSisterhood

frisbee

starsinger

fall sport: ultimate frisbee

winter sport: fencing (? probably there is a funnier sport but ive got nostalgia)

spring sport: ultimate frisbee again

winter sport: ultimate frisbee... on ice

ShriekingSisterhood

fencing is too dignified is my concern

cassetticon

i love this concept

ShriekingSisterhood

YES

starsinger

eyah exactly spiff

ShriekingSisterhood

maybe winter sport was like curling

but no one liked it so they turned it into ice ultimate frisbee

starsinger

altho like. one time my friend spilled gatorade on the mesh of his mask and had to fence with gatorade on it and couldnt see shit

and won the bout

dignity is relativw

ShriekingSisterhood

wow, amazing,

OKAY BUT

TODOROKI KILLING IT AT ICE ULTIMATE FRISBEE

starsinger

HAHAHAHHAAHAHAGUHGHFDHJFD

cassetticon

WOW

starsinger

ok no

ShriekingSisterhood

BUT BEING LIKE MEDIOCRE IN THE FALL AND SPRING

starsinger

consider

ShriekingSisterhood

AND NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND WHY

starsinger

todoroki.... being really disappointed

that curling isnt a thing anymore

ShriekingSisterhood

OH NO,,, HES BE SO GOOD AT IT....

his bitterness drives his ice frisbee prowess

starsinger

yeah not even using powers hes ujust like You Have To Understand The Ice

cassetticon

aw....

ShriekingSisterhood

the best thing about this is bakugo is so competitive that he'd join every sports even if it sucked just to win

starsinger

I Understand The Ice. and just not understanding why everone doesnt think curling is the best

ShriekingSisterhood

so bakugo is essentially Forced to play frisbee

cassetticon

yeah. god

ShriekingSisterhood

im crying.... ice understanding hand crusher

starsinger

i think hed be legit way into ultimate frisbee but fuckign hate ice frisbee but

play it anyway

he and todoroki were like the only people on the curling team and bakugou was AWFUL at it and HATED todoroki for it

ShriekingSisterhood

wow thats some real shit there

cassetticon

im crying this is so good

ShriekingSisterhood

actually i would add iida to the curling team

he also likes Understanding The Ice

starsinger

awwwwww

ShriekingSisterhood

and its a lot of speed and velocity and such considerations

which is actually relevant for his power

starsinger

mmmm true

ShriekingSisterhood

hey does iida just wear bigass pants to hide his engine legs

dataghost

was Iowa's bro also on the curling team....he joins cause he was Inspired and Wants To Live Up To Him

ShriekingSisterhood

like all the time, in v=civilian form

starsinger

sjffjdk.

maybe so.

ShriekingSisterhood

does he wear leg warmers in the summer

starsinger

AUGHGHDFH

dataghost

but then the curling team gets cut off before iida can win The Big Trophy and :(

starsinger

i feel like long skirt is more practical for this

oh noo

ShriekingSisterhood

honestly yeah

i love bnha: shittiest sports anime ever au

cassetticon

same

ShriekingSisterhood

hey is present mic supposed to be secret identity in this au too

bc i honestly cant see that

cassetticon

definitely not

dataghost

I feel like he's one of those like, celebrity heroes

cassetticon

yea

ShriekingSisterhood

besides the overall distinctiveness

he just, could not shut up about it, on his public radio show so,

cassetticon

yeah exactly.

dataghost

EYAH

plus like. it only gets the show BETTER ratings so why hide it

ShriekingSisterhood

what if hes married to Aizawa but Aizawa made him choose between being maried to civilian guy Aizawa or Eraserhead

starsinger

what if hes a celebrity hero with a radio show. and then has a civilian identity as an english teacher

ShriekingSisterhood

bc Aizawa's identity is mega secret

dataghost

god aizawa would hate all the attention either way

ShriekingSisterhood

omg

dataghost

I feel like he doesn't even want eraserhead to be a super well known hero

cassetticon

i mean thats just real in canon

ShriekingSisterhood

Aizawa, sick of the attention, tells Mic to fake his death at the hands of like a villain

"it will be good for ur show ratings"

cassetticon

he canonically does hate publicity and does not want to be known by anyone

ShriekingSisterhood

"no one bothers the dead"

dataghost

omfg

ShriekingSisterhood

or maybe the relationship is still secret but they can't ever go out anywhere bc Mic gets so easilly recognized

dataghost

Mic has so much fun pretending to be dramatically mourning his dead civilian husband

ShriekingSisterhood

"PRO HERO CELEB PRESENT MIC, SPOTTED BUYING DINNER FOR LOCAL HOMELESS MAN, AMAZING GENEROSITY"

dataghost

egjbvjjgb kon k

starsinger

FGHDJAFJ AUSFJG NOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

Re: mic mourning his dead civilian husband

hes like,

"OH IF ONLY HE HAD BEEN A SUPER TOO"

"IF ONLY HE HAD THE POWER TO, SAY, ERASE OTHER PEOPLES POWERS, HE NEVER WOULD HAVE COME TO THIS SAD FATE"

dataghost

Aizawa is just glaring Murder at him

ShriekingSisterhood

"ALSO HERES THE NEW TOP HIT FROM POP GROUP "Q 5" ITS QUITE A BOP LISTENERS"

"ITS HELPING ME GET OVER MY DEPRESSION, FROM THE, EAD HUSBAND"

starsinger

god

ShriekingSisterhood

What if present mics so bad at acting that people think he murdered his fake dead husband

cassetticon

holy fuck

starsinger

now im like. ideeply want to see the many subplots that are jsut 'iida has to deal with the time conflict between mathletics and curling'

hfdjkf

ShriekingSisterhood

what if thru some hilarious misunderstanding all might applied to be the gym teacher but it turned out he was accidentally applying to be the masthletics coach

starsinger

its shenanigans because he tries to do both of them at the same time because hes like 'i have superspeed itll be fine' its Not Fine

IJADIJ;LDFSAJLKDFKJLFDJKL NOOOOOOOOO

ShriekingSisterhood

"I thought you meant you needed a Male Athletics Coach??? M Athletics"

dataghost

he doesnt know shit about math so his only coaching contribution is like Pep Talks

starsinger

yES

all might giving INSPIRING PEP TALKS

to the mathletes

ShriekingSisterhood

"GUYS, SOMETIMES THE SINE OF A NUMBER, IS THE FRIENDS YOU MADE ALONG THE WAY"

starsinger

which end up being coached by. iida

dataghost

beuatiufl...

iida ends up stepping up as like, Team Captain Who Actually Can THelp People Train Math

starsinger

momo is in charge of the science olympiad

and also the science bowl

ShriekingSisterhood

"REACH FOR THE LIMIT, WHICH THERE IS NONE, BUT I GUESS IN MATH SOMETIMES THERE IS, BUT OTHERWISE"

starsinger

the ONLY LIMIT... IS THE LOWER LIMIT!

dataghost

theres only 1 sport but there's Many different Nerd-Offs

starsinger

yea exactly

its really funny bc its the opposite of canon where everyone is jocks even if theyre nerds

ShriekingSisterhood

everyone is nerds even if theyre joks....

finally balance

starsinger

yea...

dataghost

kaminari tries to start some kind of Movie Club as an excuse to just slack off and watch movies during club time

but then the nerds invade it and it turns into a big Trivia Game thing and kaminari just puts his head in his hands

cassetticon

He Tried

starsinger

uhghfjfd

ShriekingSisterhood

the one jock-exclusive

starsinger

and kirishima i think

ShriekingSisterhood

yeah,,,, god kirishima

cursed boy

dataghost

pats him

starsinger

i love him so much'

ShriekingSisterhood

i love him also....

dataghost

remember how bakugou joined all the sports teams just bc he could. kirishima joins all the sports teams independently bc its manly

and then bakugou assumes he's like, trying to compete with him

ShriekingSisterhood

ooooh my god

starsinger

sdfghj

ShriekingSisterhood

real

starsinger

kirishima tries to bond w bakugou abt not being good at curling and bakuogu is like hOw Dare You

ShriekingSisterhood

THIS IS THE WORST NEG OF MY LIFE

starsinger

'man how is todoroki sO good at this i dont get it'

'DIE'

dataghost

god rip kirishima

Too Cursed To Live

ShriekingSisterhood

the best thing is that when bakugo is like "ill destroy you, ill punch ur face" kirishima is just like "fyes uck me UP bro"

he 100% knows what hes getting into

starsinger

i really like the idea of bakugou bein g like ill fuck you AND todoroki up. about curling

when he cant like

skate yet

ShriekingSisterhood

hsfhdjh

hes still holding on to the bar at the edge of the rink

starsinger

ok i just looked it up and curling does not actually use skates

but

ShriekingSisterhood

talking about how hes going to be indispuitable number one curler

starsinger

eyah

dataghost

while lying on his face having fallen down

starsinger

hey guys. guys. guys does a villain attack the ice rink

and somehow it means they have to cooperate and learn a leson about teamwork

and skating pysics

but it doesnt SUPER work but it works a little bit

dataghost

god they have to ~work together~ but also not let any of the others see their powers

starsinger

fcfuki tho they dont know its them so like king explodokill is like 'maybe now i have a mmodicum of respect. for red riot. maybe. a tiny bit' but is still like KIRISHIMA MADE FUN OF ME ABOUT SKATING THO AND I HATE IT

ohhhhh thast good also fdjfdjkdfjk

maybe they have to work together to get to the locker room but wont say why (its bc their costumes r there)

but then the final fight is as hero guys?

dataghost

oo that makes sense that's good

none of them even like, stops to think about the Coincidence chdmxm

except Maybe todoroki

and even he only does like way after the fact

starsinger

yae

fuck i just rmembered izukus hero name and am having a fucking freakout

dataghost

god!!!!!

bakugou is fucking. haunted by it

does he know izuku's secret id when he picks it or does he find out later

starsinger

dataghost

like . when izuku picks the name "deku" does bakugou know yet or no

i guess this question makes less sense in this au

cause like how could he be a hero if he doesnt have a hero name yet

starsinger

i think maybe its

izuku introduces himself as the hero deku for the first time and thats when bakugou realizes that that new hero whos been running around........ is . izuku

and obvsly Flips the Fuck Out

dataghost

ghhhhhgggghh

starsinger

i think. u kno the flash onto bakugou and urarakas faces

i think id want to keep that

but with the added 'oh shit thats izuku'

context from the au

dataghost

goddddd

for uraraka too?

like is she Also just finding out

starsinger

mmmmmmaybe

maybe not actually

yeah idk depends how deep the hijinx run lol. how long izuku was determined to Not Tell Anyone About Hero Shit

dataghost

feel like it could be A Long While cause he'd feel like he'd have to be secretive For All Might

starsinger

yeahhh exactly...

altho if superheroes are a big thing but secret identities are a bigger thing it might be Less secretive

bc like. theres no inherent connection between 'a new superhero appears' and 'all might'

dataghost

but I feel like izuku would be nervous anyway

starsinger

yeah for sure

dataghost

and he's v strategic & thoughtful so I feel like he'd Understand The Importance Of Secret Identity and be like "no one ever!!!!"

starsinger

yeahh That rings true for me ithink

i was just like 'if 'quirkless izuku' and 'hero deku' arent inherently connected bc Every Civilian Secret Identity Is Quirkless then its not as big a deal

dataghost

yeah also fair

so are quirks way rarer in this au?

starsinger

but ur right that all might def has the No One Can Know Im Human thing

and izuku would also probably

i dont know if quirks are Rarer or if theyre just hilariously secret even tho literally most of the population has one

and many of them are very visible

dataghost

what if like. quirklessness is rare but everyone's civilian id is still quirkless

and everyone just. d oesnt notice

starsinger

tsuyu: yeah im quirkless. kero.

dataghost

also like. Basically everyone who's quirkless is actually a hero in disguise

but no one puts the dots together

starsinger

just had the thought 'i really like bnha superhero au' and fuckgin died

48 notes · View notes

hatsukeii · 5 years ago

Note

hello! can i request a scenario where the reader is a manager along w/ yachi and kageyama and tsukki have like the PHATTEST crush on them but what they didnt kno is that yachi and the reader are dating bc they thought they were just Rlly Good Friends and the reader is vv affectionate? and like how would they react once they found out that theyre dating? IDK IF IT MAKES SENSE IM SO SORRY I THOUGHT ABT THIS AT 3AM HSKDJDD ANYWAYS THANK UU AND IM SORRY AGAIN

OKAY I HAD SO MANY PENDING REQUESTS AND UNFINISHED DRAFTS BUT THIS THIS IS TOO GOOD TO PROCRASTINATE ON ABHAHAH-

And DON’T BE SORRY BEBY, 3am is when our inner Voltaire shows.

Btw if you wanna be tagged in this scenario just comment or pm me!!

You guys seem to be very good friends//Kageyama x Reader x Tsukishima

Word count: 1900+

Warnings: mild swearing

Summary: Tsukishima and Kageyama decide to ask their crush out, not knowing about her own relationship status.

“You’re not asking her out, I am. She said she likes darker hair more when I asked her last week.”

“Back off you Oompa Loompa, she’s gonna be mine by the end of the month. You’re too dumb for her anyways.”

“No way in hell would she want your salty ass.”

“You wanna say that again to my face you little bitch-”

“Hey guys.”

The two boys jumped up in surprise, blushing wildly at your unexpected arrival to the gym.

It’s been about two months since THE incident. You know, the time when the volleyball team decided to play truth or dare at Daichi’s, and both Tsukishima and Kageyama were dared to text their crushes “You are less shitty than everyone else, just saying.” It wasn’t until (Y/N) called Kageyama asking why both him and Tsukishima sent her such a weird text, did the two members of the team find out that they shared a crush with their archenemy. From that day on, the two have been trying even harder to irritate and taunt each other during practice. The both of them were determined to beat the other at confessing their feelings and taking her out. This day was no exception.

“O-oh hi (Y/N), what brings you here? It’s like 7, practice just ended.” Tsukishima questioned, awkwardly scratching his head as he tried his best not to sound like a stuttering idiot.

“Yeah, it’s late, uh- you shou-should ho gome- I MEAN GO HOME.” The blond smirked as the raven haired setter completely stumbled over his own words, slapping a hand to his mouth while his face continued to burn crimson.

The tiny girl in front of them gave the two that godforsaken amazing adorable heart melting smile, chuckling angelically, before explaining. “Ah, I’m actually here to pick Yachi up, she told me she was staying behind to help clean the gym out because I had plans after school. I promised her I would pick her up at 7, would you happen to know where she is?” The two boys looked at each other, before racing to the storage closet, competing to be the one that brings the blond manager to the girl of their dreams. “You could’ve just told me where she was, but okay! Thanks!” (Y/N) yelled after them.

“Jesus Christ you tyrant king, how’d you get here quicker?” Kageyama smugly grinned at Tsukishima as he approached Yachi. “Yachi, (Y/N)’s outside, she said she was picking you up.” The blonde manager’s face lit up, dropping the last volleyball into the basket. “Oh! Oh shit, I have to go now guys, see you!” Kageyama followed Yachi out of the storage closet, purposely shoving Tsukishima back with his shoulder on the way out, earning a scowl. “I got Yachi, you two head home now, stay safe!” “Thank you so much Kageyama, you two stay safe when you leave too!” The shorter manager waved the two boys off, lacing her fingers with Yachi’s as they walked out of the gym. “Tch, let’s see who gets her now shitty glasses. I helped her when she needed it.” Tsukishima rolled his eyes, letting out his shit eating smirk as he snickered. “Mhm, ho gome, very good grammar you got there. The only somewhat smart thing you’ve done is get her best friend. Sis probably still thinks you’re stupid.” Kageyama went silent for a moment, before lashing out at the middle blocker, grabbing his collar and shaking him violently. “Oi, we never speak of that again! Ever!” “Whatever you say baby dick. I’m still gonna ask her out to the festival, you’re not gonna stop me.” Tsukishima gave Kageyama a sneer, before packing his stuff and leaving the gym without turning anything off, just to piss Kageyama off. “Annoying ass shittyshima.”

Throughout the next week, the two boys have tried relentlessly to grab (Y/N)’s attention. From secret love notes, to chocolates in her locker, to a full blown necklace. To say she was intrigued, but unbothered, would be pretty much accurate. “Hm? (Y/N)? Another love note? Who could it be? They’re getting on my nerves....” The shorter manager waved her hands, stuffing the letter back into her locker as she tried to explain to the blonde. “I don’t know who it is, but this is the third day in a row, and there’s chocolates too.” Yachi huffed out, before wrapping an arm around her. “Those scrawny ass boys better not be hitting on you!” (Y/N) chuckled a little bit, before tapping Yachi’s nose. “Even if they were, it wouldn’t matter to me.” The two of them continued to walk down the hallways, gaining occasional stares and glances along the way as they chatted.

Kageyama and Tsukishima watched from their lockers, anticipating her reaction to their love notes and chocolates. “Not even a glance?” “It’s been three days, she’s ought to be the slightest bit curious, no?” They watched as you frantically shoved the letter back into your locker as Yachi stood with her hands on her hips. The blonde then proceeded to wrap an arm around you as you tapped her nose. “Hm, they sure are close aren’t they? (Y/N)’s constantly looking for Yachi, and she always comes and picks her up if she stays until late. They’re so comfortable with each other that they even hold hands.” Tsukishima analysed, pushing his glasses up as he glanced at Kageyama, who was still completely confused with what had just happened. “How are we supposed to get through Yachi? She seems to never approve of anyone that dares confess to (Y/N). You remember Hiroyama from a few months back? He tried confessing, and ended up getting scared away by Yachi. He looked like he was about to piss his pants. He wouldn’t get anywhere near (Y/N) for weeks. I don’t wanna end up like him.” The blue haired setter recalled, slightly nervous about his plan to confess. “You know what? Screw it. I’m gonna go ask her out now.” Tsukishima jogged towards you and Yachi, Kageyama trailing closely behind him. “LIKE HELL ARE YOU ASKING HER OUT BEFORE ME SHITTY GLASSES!”

“Me? You’re asking me?” Tsukishima was now blushing furiously. “I- I just- ye- tch, yeah, I-I’m asking if yo-you wanna b-be my date for the s-summer festival.” Kageyama’s face fell. Oh god no, Tsukishima’s attempt better fail, or I won’t have a chance at all. “Oi, Tsukishima, back off. She’s not going to go with you.” Tsukishima gave his iconic sarcastic smile. “Yachi, maybe you should just let me ask your best friend out? I’ve been pondering over it for weeks, and I’m not about to let this opportunity slip. Maybe you should stop scaring guys away when they confess to her, that way she’ll actually have some form of freedom.” He slightly snarled, cheeks still completely red. Kageyama approached the three. “So, Shittyshima, you got rejected and now you’re salty about it? Told you she doesn’t want you, she’d be much better off going to the festival with me.” “Wha-” “Oh yeah Kageyama? Go back and coddle with Hinata first-” “OI YOU LITTLE BITCH WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME-” “Guys stop.” The two boys stopped their bantering instantly, now embarrassed and flustered. “I’m not going with either of you. I’m going with Yachi.” The blond middle blocker scoffed. “Well you guys seem to be very good friends indeed. Deadass the whole point of the festival is that it’s for people that want to ask someone out, at this point you two should just get married. Plus, Yachi literally scares away anyone that tries to ask you out, maybe she should stop controlling who you’re together with?” Yachi gave (Y/N) a weird look, before they both burst out laughing like madmen.

“AHDHHDHAHAHAAH YOU REALLY THOUGHT I SCARED THOSE PEOPLE AWAY BECAUSE I DIDN’T APPROVE OF THEM?”

Kageyama raised an eyebrow. “Uh, yeah. What could it possibly be anyways?”

The two girls continued to cackle.

“TSUKISHIMA, KAGEYAMA, THE ONLY REASON WHY I WON’T GO OUT WITH ANYONE, AND WHY YACHI DOESN’T LET PEOPLE CONFESS TO ME, IS BECAUSE WE’RE DATING!”

What in the name of hell?

“YOU WHAT?” The two boys screamed, eyes now wide with shock.

“Yeah, we’re dating, now back off. You may be my friends, but if you do anything to my dear (Y/N) I won’t hesitate to make you piss your pants!” Yachi puffed out her cheeks, putting her hands on her hips. They continued to stare at them in shock, trying to take in all this new information. “(Y/N), you never told me that you were- that you were lesbian?” (Y/N) laughed heartily at Tsukishima’s question, taking a deep breath, before continuing to cackle. “I’m not lesbian, I’m bisexual, but Yachi’s lesbian. We’ve been dating for an entire year by now! How have you two not noticed at all? Everyone in the volleyball team knows!” The two boys looked to the ground out of embarrassment. “O-oh, I take back all the love letters I gave you, I-I didn’t know.” Kageyama mumbled, fiddling with his fingers. “Ye-yeah same, but you can keep the chocolates.” Tsukishima twirled his earphone jack around his finger in an attempt to calm himself down. “We’ll be going now, see you two later!” The manager yelled, waving them off. “What the hell just happened?” Kageyama whispered. “I think we just got rejected-” “YEAH NO SHIT WE GOT REJECTED SHITTY GLASSES.”

“HINATA!” “Yeah Kageyama-” “WHY DID YOU NEVER TELL ME (Y/N) AND YACHI WERE DATING?” The spiker went silent, before snickering to himself. “So you finally found out.” Kageyama zoomed towards the orange haired boy. “I’M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU ABSOLUTE DUMBASS!” “AHAHHA I’M SORRY BAKAGEYAMA! YOU WERE JUST WAY TOO DENSE, I HAD TO SEE WHETHER YOU WOULD FIND OUT EVENTUALLY OR NOT!” “YOU LITTLE SHIT, WHAT THE HELL KIND OF THOUGHT PROCESS IS THAT? I TALKED ABOUT CONFESSING SO MANY TIMES AND YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT INFORMING ME OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP?”

“Yamaguchi.” “Hm, Tsukki, what’s up?” Tsukishima’s face darkened. “Why didn’t you tell me (Y/N) was taken?” Yamaguchi shrunk away from the blond’s tall figure. “I thou-thought you knew already? It was super obvious!” The taller boy sighed, scratching the back of his head. “I made a complete fool of myself because I didn’t know she was dating Yachi.” Yamaguchi’s mouth hung open. “Don’t tell me-” “Yes, I tried to ask her out.” “TSUKKI I’VE ALREADY TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT!” “YEAH WELL YOU REALLY THOUGHT I WOULD LISTEN TO SOMEONE THAT TOLD ME NOT TO ASK MY CRUSH OUT WITH NO APPARENT REASON?”

From afar, the two girls observed amusedly. “Hm, I wonder how Hinata’s gonna die? He was the first one to find out about us.” Kageyama was still chasing Hinata around wildly, trying to grab at his club tee. “I honestly wonder what Tsukishima’s gonna do to Yamaguchi. Poor guy. Tsukishima had his headphones on as he went through his phone, his ears still red from bringing up the issue. Yamaguchi was next to him, trying to calm him down, but to no avail. “Ahh, out of everyone, I least expected these two to not realise early on. I thought Tsukishima was good at reading people.” You stated to Yachi, laughing a bit. “I know right? I swear, that was hilarious. Did you see his face? Mans looked like that strawberry on that cake he had for lunch this afternoon! God, I would literally pay to see that face again.”

I guess the two boys now know not to hit on (Y/N) ever again.

Yesss I love this request so much oh my god thank you-

48 notes · View notes

739337369137371082 · 4 years ago

Note

Hey so I found u thru the Halved Live Funnies and I gotta ask... whose Leon? What series these dudes from?

i got this ask and then forgot about it for like 2 days. anyways.

IVE ANSWERED THIS BEFORE BUT. GOD. LEON. ok so like....... long story short last year was when i first played resident evil........ bc we got a copy of re2remake in and.... jesus christ. i hyperfixated so fucking hard for the better part of a year going on into this year. and then i watched hl/vr and well. we know where that went. but now i am once again hyperfixated and now im back to where i was in like.... june of last year LMAO. but anyways i am once again going to ramble under the cut about them <3 (seriously. its very long and doesnt go much of anywhere. also spoilers)

tl/dr:

OK. SO. resident evil. the last time i answered this ask i either hadnt played some of them or just completely forgot the plot of others LOL but now upon beating/playing a large majority of them (besides 6 which i have not touched yet, and 7 is first person and im not rly interested in it rn)...... well others have said this as well but if you like cheesy b action movies you would love resident evil!!!

the orig 1-2 are more survival horror which is what i like the most. 3 is where it starts branching into more actiony stuff but is still survival horror. but 4 and after is just like..... cheesy action stuff which is fine but not really like.... my thing. altho i do think that they are fun in a “this plot is hilariously bad” type way because i do enjoy horrible things. but people who like resident evil dont like it for the plot they like it for the characters. and for me i latched the fuck onto leon kennedy and tyrant t-00 aka mr fucking x

listen.......... you guys know me relatively well enough to know that i have a type......... and i would define leon as not really fitting under it usually because he is 1. under 6 foot 2. human and 3. very much not a villain. but something about (mostly remake) leon hits fucking different!!!!!! hes kind and means well, thinks about others constantly, looks like an actual fucking person in the in game graphics instead of being some manufactured perfect model, nice voice, etc....... i fucking care him so much. also gameplay wise i find his weapons to be more enjoyable than claires so i always end up playing his route/2nd route the most compared to hers. but i do also like claire :) shes nice and epic

i dont really like the newer leons (4 and afterwards) as much.... i mean a lot of it has to do with trauma and general “growing up” after what happened in re2 but hes just so constantly... snarky? jaded? constantly spouting lines to make him seem cool? when in my head hes very much like... a loser LMAO. i mean dont get me wrong hes a badass. he survives a fucking zombie outbreak and nearly gets murdered dozens of time. thats the definition of badass. but also you cannot change my mind that hes also a anxious loser twunk. there is literally nothing you can do to convince me he is “cool” like the games and movies want to think. this is probably heresy to re fans but this is my truth

https://youtu.be/aVZWuSfGStk?t=129

here is a vid of his cutscenes. obvious spoilers in there but you can skip around and see how cute he is. also yes in his first cutscene he is listening to butt rock. i switch between thinking hes just listening to it because nothing else is on the radio or his taste really is that terrible

also you literally CANNOT convince me that he is straight. the games try SOOOOO hard to get you to ship leon/ada or leon/claire but like...... i cannot see it. he has one of the gayest run animations i have ever seen in re2 remake and i mean... he just radiates gay trans man energy to me. also please look at this small scene from one of the animated movies where a licker jumps on top of him and he wraps his legs around its hips and lifts it off of him to not die. gay king

https://youtu.be/d-VNikxYBPw?t=9

but yes ive basically decided to ignore all characterization from re4 and onwards regarding leon at least. every leon after that is not my leon (except in special cases when im thinking about something like leon/jd from re damnation..... they did jd so dirty and they should have fucking kissed. or how cute he looked in vendetta sometimes)

ANYWAYS. MR X

so basically there are these enemies in resident evil called “tyrants” that are manufactured by the evil capitalist company umbrella that are near indestructible save for like.... rocket launchers or super heavy artillery that youre not buying at your local gun store. and in re2 one of them get sent to the police station where leon and claire are and is told to wipe out all witnesses. (i also do think that 2 or more were sent there... or at least in the area when this happened due to some very obvious plot hole stuff on each route no matter how you play, even tho the devs have come out and said that only 1 existed in the game and that each route is like “a parallel dimension” to each other. i wont go into it more than that but i choose to ignore that)

and well. when i first played it i knew of mr x but didnt like... know much about him other than that he was a monster and Tall (like 7 or 8 feet tall) and that he chased you around. that already sold me on him but then. well. you first encounter him because he lifts up an entire goddamn helicopter and then proceeds to chase you. and it was then that i knew i was in deep shit because he fucking stomped his way into my heart and never left.

mr x basically has serious Side Character Disorder where (even tho the remake made him very cool and epic and did him really well compared to nemesis in re3 remake which is an entire different can of worms) he has LITERALLY no personality or like. thoughts. or anything. hes only there to chase you around and be on screen for like 10 seconds for a couple of cutscenes and then not show up again until the very end of the game for you to fight on leons route. but god. he means so fucking much to me.

you know how people latch onto random side characters that have no personality and essentially flesh them out more than the creators ever will? thats me with mr x. its gotten to the point where certain songs come on on my spotify and i actually get EMOTIONS or even TEARS because they remind me of him, but its not even really HIM, its the fucking ideas that ive come up with regarding him because all he ever does in game is chase you around and punch you and then die and is never brought up again

but anyways. mr x is a tall monster who chases leon and claire around in their routes but mr x is leons main monster in the game (claire has a different one). he chases leon around, literally never stops looking at him as he chases him, gets hit by an entire fucking car which then explodes BUT THEN chases him down into the sewers and into a secret underground lab just to get to him like a fucking bloodhound who, once he has the scent, will never stop chasing him

(you can see why this made me kind of insane)

just. AGHHH. the tyrants in this series get treated so dirty. i desperately want capcom to give us some sort of tyrant that can actually fucking like.... go against orders and brainwashing or whatever and actually have emotions and thoughts!!!!!!!!!! but capcom would never do anything with it cause its a rough and tough action series and people arent here to see tyrants have some sort of thought process beyond punching and killing and people only want to shoot guns at them instead of thinking about the possibilities of a tyrant that goes against its programming.

i so desperately want an au where mr x got the transmitter shot off of the side of his head (and while capcom never mentioned this ever many re2 fans have since decided that it is what feeds info/orders to him. i flip flop between thinking that it either is near controlling him and prevents free will and thought or that its just giving him orders and that hes just burying/hiding/not showing free will and thought in fear of being killed. either that or someone at umbrella is “piloting” him but also the whole point of tyrants is that theyre supposed to be smart enough to think for themselves somewhat so... eh). GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

ive explained a bunch of this stuff in my other ask about it but just...... xleon means so much to me when it should not and will never be actually canon

anyways please play re2 remake at least, you dont have to know everything about re1 to like it, just go into it knowing that a few months ago in the mountains outside raccoon city claires brother chris and a few members on his team went to a mansion where they discovered umbrella doing shady zombie shit there. re2 remake was hyped up for years for a reason and it is really good, even if its short (altho i do appreciate short games in this day and age cause not every game needs to be like 60 plus hours long).

maybe one day when its not late and i can actually think i will explain all this better but todays not that day <3

(EDIT: ALSO RE DAMNATION TYRANTS ARE 14 FEET TALL. AND CHASE AROUND LEON AND ACTUALLY FUCKING RUN. FUN FACT! anyways while i do think jd in that movie and leon should kiss i also want leon and a tyrant from that movie to kiss. bye)

9 notes · View notes