#but ill remain loyal
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I am sorry, but I don't have time to fight and treat dead things like if they were alive. I'll be the bad one you decide: The bad friend who gave up out of spite (in spite of trying to keep it real, ours), or the bad friend who uses "mental illness" to excuse all the crap.
I won't keep investing when there are no ears to listen the aches of my side. I will maintain my feet on my belief, where oversharing and overexplaining are just as painful and nonsensical as trying to validate myself based of your level (and choosing) of understanding.
Is it even fair to not respect what you can't seem to understand? Wait, I'm remembering just now about how badly we talked behind our friend's back, yeah, the one with a serious mental illness that bothered you just as much because she didn't fit inside your narrowed sight.
Do you expect me to believe that you don't think the same about me, when I've been scolded for been sick? Specially after trying to make me feel bad for "not writing you every day or night" just like "true friends are supposed to do" or "social people does", almost like if there is only one way to do it right.
I deleted all my alibis, forwith I don't seek to be right. I just want to live a healthy, humble and authentic life, and I will never ask you to change for that. I'll leave or I'll stay, but never demand you what doesn't come from your insides.
And yes, I can change my mind and my heart as much as I decide. I don't need anyone's permission for that. Hell, I can't conceive a life without doing that. I am who I am now, but there has been many more, and I am proud for that.
There is only one person who deserves to cut my tongue and keep my mouth shut. To kneel for and apologize (yes, I've been mean and unkind). And it isn't your eyes the ones the ones that come to mind.
I am sorry to be so personal this time. Yes, I've been unkind, but I'll remain loyal to my heart.
#i.r dagger#quotes#writeblr#female anger#poetry#spilled guts#spilled poetry#spilled ink#spilled feelings#spilled thoughts#spilled words#spilled writing#writing#creative writing#writers on tumblr#poem#original prose#prose#prose poem#words words words#yes I've been unking#but ill remain loyal#to my heart#unlovable#friendship#friends#im an asshole#theres no doubt about that#but shhhh#you are not better than I
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How do you think Runningnose felt, looking down from starclan, watching his clan fall apart again. Rowanclaw dead, Tigerheart dead, the leader and deputy dead, the clan in shambles, ready to fall apart and join skyclan or be picked up by the next wannabe dictator that came by.
How do you think he felt watching Puddleshine suggest the most WILD idea, watching a patrol of cats carry his body to the moonpool. Was he proud of this medicine cat who was thrust into the position? Was he angry at himself for not thinking of the idea when Nightstar died. Did he wish he had the strength, faith, or foresight to carry his dying leader to the moonstone like this?
I can only imagine the bittersweet relief Runningnose felt at watching Tigerstar come back, at watching shadowclanâs resurrection, knowing it avoided breaking down again by just a whisker.
#also: AU where Runningnose gets a sign about tigerstarâs treachery and he lets shadowclan know about nightstarâs lie#Iâm imagining all of shadowclan. Ill and tired and underfed all making the journey#a clan supporting each other in their darkest hour#the one time cats that arenât leader or medicine cat descend into mothermouth#would Tigerclaw have revealed himself and attacked the sick nightstar or would he have doubled down on his deception#it would be in blackfootâs character to remain loyal to his clan and his leader no matter what#perhaps Tigerclaw is appointed deputy and the dog pack plan is to kill nightstar. or brings in scourge to kill nightstar#can you tell nightstar and Puddleshine are my favourite warrior cats?#warrior cats#nightstar#Runningnose#puddleshine
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WWHAT THE FUCJ??
I JUST OPENED ARCANA TWILIGHT AND IMMEDIATELY GOT AN AD FOR OBEY ME!?????? YOU WANT ME TO CHEAT ON MY BOYS?????????
#how DARE they#i am an extremely loyal young woman thank you very much#how can you even suggest such a thing đ¤#i mean ill play it eventually#someday#but for now i remain loyal to my silly star sorcerers#arcana twilight#obey me!#my post#my post (obey me!)#my post (arcana twilight)
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Yandere DILF! Headcanons
Warnings: Obsessive Behaviour, Non-Explicit Implications of Smut, Implications of Infidelity, Age Gap, Non-Consensual Surveillance, Mention of Assault, No Pronouns used for Reader except âYouâ.
⥠Yandere DILF who has always had everything he could ever want handed to him on a silver platter: women, highly paid positions in some corporation or another, wealth â etc.
⥠Yandere DILF who, before today, never actually thought love existed. True love, that is.
⥠Yandere DILF who, even with a beautiful wife to his name, one he settled for before because he thought that was the normal thing to do â what was expected of him â has never felt his heart shutter or his cheeks set ablaze with the anxiety of first love, making the whole concept null. Void.
⥠Yandere DILF whose life changes the second he meets you â whose world begins turns upside down as he spots you sat on his sofa, his wife beside you, speaking with kind, smiling eyes.
⥠Yandere DILF whose interest, for the first time in his entire life, is piqued, and whose urge to pursue any information he can get his hands on is ignited.
⥠Yandere DILF who is convinced that itâs only to extinguish this newfound interest in the beautiful stranger in his home.
⥠Yandere DILF whose wife gives him the perfect guise to do so â to âget to know you,â just as she requested â seeing as you are their new babysitter, after all.
⥠Yandere DILF with the perfect house, a well-paying job, a loving family and good looks, feels as if he has nothing but his image of the ideal suburban father when he sees you, when he knows that, regardless of how wrong it is, he must have you.
⥠Yandere DILF whose resolve to remain loyal to his wife cracks every time he hears you call him âSirâ or âMr. Laurierâ.
⥠Yandere DILF whose thoughts become increasingly centric of you the longer he knows you, yet knows nothing of you save for whatever his wife tells him, a finite, human resource he can only mine so much before she becomes suspicious.
⥠Yandere DILF who, for the first time, feels as if he is the pursuer rather than the pursued.
⥠Yandere DILF who initially tries to fight this growing infatuation of who you could be â who you are â and tries to keep his dear, sweet wife in mind. One which he cares little for.
⥠Yandere DILF who finds himself having discovered loopholes in his own logic by, quite simply, for brief samples of memory, replacing his wife with you.
⥠Yandere DILF, whose mind has been buzzing with you for the last month, just before going out for the evening, considers âfalling illâ to have an excuse to stay at the house with you, to talk to you, to touch you. To see what made you so special as to drive him up the wall.
⥠Yandere DILF whose idea crumbles as he realises such a plan would entail him spending time with (and potentially being caught by) his two children, for whom he held no particular affection.
⥠Yandere DILF who is drip-fed information in the time between you arriving and he and his wife leaving, from which he gleans only shards of a larger puzzle that paints no clearer a picture of the mysterious younger person who has so seamlessly captured both his heart and his attention.
⥠Yandere DILF whose mind doesnât recoil as the first thought â image â of you doing something less than decent with him, born from you bending over to pick something up that fell from the kitchen counter, giving him a view heâd previously tried to avoid for his own sanityâs sake.
⥠Yandere DILF who has to try and look his wife in the eyes as that picture of you â and others which emerge from the cracks in his mind â remains with him for the entire evening.
⥠Yandere DILF who has to resist the urge to take you into his arms and bury you in his bedsheets, or drape you in his coat, on the rare occasion youâd fall asleep on the sofa, his children safely tucked away in bed and exhaustion having taken you somewhere far from here.
⥠Yandere DILF who canât help the dangerous thought that you need a protector â him â to protect you from other boys your age who would gladly take advantage of your vulnerable state.
⥠Yandere DILF who unabashedly succumbs to those same fantasies of heroism and lust in an isolated private bathroom stall at work.
⥠Yandere DILF who canât help but begin to wonder if heâd be your first; your first kiss, your first love, your first time, and if youâd take to him as strongly as heâd taken to you.
⥠Yandere DILF who, after many months, many yearning, daydreaming, dragging months, eventually receives the God-given opportunity to invite you into his house when you swing by for something other than your job â to pass on a message to his wife, or something or other â while sheâs out shopping and his children are at school.
⥠Yandere DILF whose heart palpitates in ways it never did for his wife â or any partner, for that matter.
⥠Yandere DILF who actually felt as if what he said and did here mattered, that you would not be so quick to overlook any of his transgressions as his many conquests before you had.
⥠Yandere DILF who offers you a drink and, just for a second, has the nasty little thought to spike it, to whisk you away somewhere where it will only ever be the two of you. Then thinks better of it since he knows you will be missed.
⥠Yandere DILF who considers offering â insisting â a glass of whiskey, much like the one heâs poured for himself. âTo be hospitableâ, is what heâd tell himself. Though, he knows the true reason; that being to excuse anything unsavoury that may occur in your inebriated state, absolving both of you of guilt if the instigator was in his system, too. Despite his ability to hold it undoubtedly exceeding yours.
⥠Yandere DILF who, after you decline the beverage, claiming to be âin a hurryâ, sits with you as if you were an idol, and finally comes to know your likes, dislikes, preferences for music and weather and everything outside and between purely by making you forget why you had to leave so soon to begin with.
⥠Yandere DILF who desperately draws your attention from the setting sun outside, or distracts you from checking your phone and seeing how long youâd been there, how long ago you were supposed to have left.
⥠Yandere DILF who only realises the age gap between the two of you when you tell him it was your birthday recently, and divulge your age and the gifts youâd received, making him feel, for a brief moment of true lucidity, wrong for all he has thought of and done in the name of you.
⥠Yandere DILF who is taken aback when you ask him about himself, and seem to show such a vested interest in his answers â his interests. Rather than his body count or his salary. Especially when all heâs been talking about is you.
⥠Yandere DILF who only falls deeper into this pit of obsession, feeling himself having to fight the urge to sit closer to you as each hour ticks by.
⥠Yandere DILF whose resolve dissolves, losing the battle as you look at him with nothing less than sheer enthusiasm for everything heâs saying, hanging on his every word in a way that his wife seemed to have forgotten. And, inching closer, his knee touches yours ever so gently, his arm sliding round the backrest of the sofa and encircling you like a snake.
⥠Yandere DILF who, for the first time, finds himself pining for even a morsel of accidental contact, of a misplaced brush of your hand against his side, to feel you touch him.
⥠Yandere DILF who, by the end of the afternoon, just as his wife returns, sees you notice the time and rush to hurry away, a cold aura gripping him as your glistening presence evacuates. His mood, inflated with what he could construe as no less than joy, deflates in a heartbeat.
⥠Yandere DILF who, as you urgently relay the message to his wife, stands nearby, hands in his pockets, waiting for something â anything â to happen.
⥠Yandere DILF who, as if being struck through the heart by Cupidâs arrow, feels his body go rigid as you rush to him and bestow upon him a small hug, no obvious intent behind it as you gift one to his wife, too, who, seemingly not so lovestruck, is much more receptive.
⥠Yandere DILF who, that night, chides himself for not having taken you into his arms, who makes love to his wife to forget his lapse in action. And he sees your face â your body â instead of hers, hears your voice in her stead, calling him by his name in a way he could only hope to make you one day.
⥠Yandere DILF who, finally, with the know-how, begins buying you small gifts; nothing too grandiose as to rouse the suspicion of you or his wife; just acts of implied selflessness you initially refuse as you tell him âYour kindness is reward enough !â
⥠Yandere DILF who knows youâre only being polite, seeing as heâd also begun to increase your wage (without his wifeâs knowing), telling you that youâre ���a hard worker,â âdeserving of much more than this.â
⥠Yandere DILF who wants to give you so much more than the gift he holds behind his back for you â who wants to give you himself and all that he could provide for you.
⥠Yandere DILF who doesnât take your modesty for an answer and gives you your late birthday present; a plush toy.
⥠Yandere DILF who relinquishes its purpose to you; âTo keep you safe if ever youâre scared. Or even just alone or upset.â
⥠Yandere DILF whose heart almost explodes as your face lights up in a smile when you take the bear into your arms, your fingers brushing his, and hold it tightly to your chest. He can see your nostril twitch as the purposefully placed scent of his cologne reaches your senses.
⥠Yandere DILF who feels something South of his logic twitch in his pants as your mouth forms around his name.
⥠âThank you, Mr. Laurier,â
⥠Yandere DILF whose lips curl into a smile, his eyes catching the camera within the bearâs.
⥠âPlease,â he says, shedding his coat, having chosen a light-coloured shirt to reveal the physique heâs maintained just for you. ⥠âCall me Dominic.â
Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)
Masterlist Yandere AI Masterlist Masterpost
AO3 Wattpad
#yandere#male yandere#yandere male#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#yandere x darling#yandere headcanons#yandere scenarios#yandere imagines#yandere smut#tw yandere#yandere oc#yandere oc x reader#yandere blog#creative writing#reader insert#writerblr#original writing#original yandere
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Workshop Fun
Summary: This is a short one-shot (7021 words) where the Reader (female) has an established relationship with Art the Clown, and has been kiiiind of collaborating with him passively. Reader is wearing a dress for the sole purpose of easy access. Reader has a vulva and breasts.Â
Contents: Biting, light spanking, ...phone... sex? Having an unknowing participant on the other line is the only way I can word it, light spanking, lots of making out, clothed sex, BDSM, Art being cruel, p in v penetration, finger sucking and light body worship
Authorâs notes: Sorry what took me so long to do this, Iâve been sitting on this for years! Male version will be out in a few days. This is LIGHTLY proofread, so keep your expectations at a level where you wonât be surprised if thereâs any mistakes. Also once again I am an Art the Clown front zipper truther for my clothed sex kink.
ââââââââââââââââââ   Â
You loved him.
Did he kill people? Yes. Did he sometimes allude to killing you as well? Absolutely. Has he acted on it yet? Not fully, but you could tell that sometimes he had that compulsion to go through with it, when heâd get that twinkle in his eye.
 Especially when you were up close and personal with him, your bodies merely inches apart, sometimes with him even holding a weapon in hand. Heâs a wild animal. A force of evil locked away in the confines of a corporeal body made of flesh and bone.
And yet, all the same, you loved him. The way that his hands would travel across your flesh and explore the parts of you that you never let anyone else. Sometimes heâd leave bruises, other times scratches. Then there were the bite marks. Each intimate encounter would leave you in a different state of mess. He was the lover who was like a cat. One day heâd be here, gone the next. You couldnât put a thumb on the patterns.
The waits were long, but youâre loyal, and youâre patient. You didnât really have much of a choice in the matter. Youâd wait until the ends of the earth for him. Sometimes during the months that he wasnât here, youâd dream of him. All of these little fantasies youâd have in your head would sometimes come to visit you behind your closed lids, where reality had no limitations. It would make the ache feel less. Every time that heâd come back, you made sure to find him as quickly as possible the second you heard whisperings pertaining to sightings of him, or any kind of crime scene that felt like it had his signature on it. Sometimes heâd find you first.
Art wasnât someone who was very materialistic. And money meant next to nothing to Artâthe personification of evil had very little need for the vast kinds of desires that plagued man.
But he wasnât necessarily immune to the pleasures of the flesh, you learned. Despite how for the most part, he remained heavily uninterested in intimacy, he had a few moments here and there, and you capitalized on them when you could. You had a feeling tonight would be one of those nights.
Or, well, you hoped.
Worst case scenario heâd turn you away or ignore any advances, and he has a few times. And that was okay.
You came into his hideout tonight with confidence instilled in you, but yet the excitement still makes your stomach do flips. Itâs been too long, and the fire within your chest is reignited. You feel passion, you feel love so strong that itâs enough to keep you up at night, and it has happened plenty of times before. You wonder if heâs got some sort of spell over you, and youâd believe it if that were the case. Youâve never fallen so madly, deeply, for anyone before like you have him. It could be enough to make you physically ill if you thought about how much you loved him. Such a passion came with such a detriment to you.
Past the damaged doors of a since abandoned fairly abandoned warehouse, you have a smooth descent down the stairs, leading you to a type of basement setting. Thereâs plenty of water dripping. Rats squeaking as they chitter and skitter along. You catch glimpses of them in the dim lighting, but they donât bother you. As long as you didnât see a bunch of them with their tails tied together, you wager youâll be pretty okay.
You dressed up nicely for him tonight.
You werenât really a dress kind of person, but tonight you made it an exception. It wasnât fancy or over the top, and by the love of god, it had pockets. You refused to wear heels however, whatever shoes you had that worked and didnât give you the possibility of breaking your ankle down these flights of stairs was the option you went with. Art might have found it funny if you hurt yourself, but you arenât too keen on getting yourself dinged up before he gets the chance to do it himself.
The dress was about one thingâaccessibility. Easy to lift up, easy for him to slide in right where he belonged.
You loved when he was inside of you, when youâd feel the heat of his heavy breath against the back of your neck. You run your hands over the spot where you last remember feeling the warmth of his breath. You remember being beneath him and feeling as if the very heat that he quietly exhaled felt as if it were smoldering your skin, burning you like the way the flames of hell were supposed to. If being with this clown meant that youâd be burning in the afterlife, youâd gladly bathe yourself in the inferno.
Your stomach flutters.
You shouldnât be this excited. Heâs a murderer. A killer. A man with no morals, and youâre not even sure if he was a man sometimes at all. Yet, his darkness is what drew you in. He was your safe space, and no one would dare come into that space to try and harm you so long as you were in his arms.
When you reach the bottom of the steps, you see itâa single dangling light, and illuminating this dark space is a double door that is plainly rusted. You see a bloody handprint on it. Itâs since dried.
You recognize the size of that hand, and feel slightly lighter, just in the moment.
Placing your own hand in the exact space over Artâs bloodied print, you push the door open. The door is a little on the heavy side, but with enough force, the door opens.
âArt?â You call out, making sure that your presence is acknowledged as friendly and not hostile. The room is a little darkly lit, very heavy on the minimum lighting thatâs needed to navigate in the space. It most certainly added to the creepy ambiance. Straight ahead, there sat none other than Art. His back was given to you. He was sitting on a stool, hammering away at something on his workbench. He turns his head upon hearing his name, and you see that he gives you a smile, baring his rotted discolored teeth as his eyes are closed. You can see the wrinkles form a little in the corner of his eyes when he smiles.
You liked that. You liked the details etched into his face. It added character among those otherwise gaunt features of his.
âHey, buddy.â You call out to him, and he gives you a little wave, before gesturing for you to come closer.
You approach him, and once youâre near the bench with him, you can see when youâre close enough that he gives you a once over, assessing you⌠Judging you, for what it is youâre wearing tonight.
âLike it?â You ask him, twirling from side to side so that your dress splays out a little. Itâs simple. Gets the job done. And if it got ruined? No love loss.
Artâs gaze seems fixed on you, first on your dress, then up at you. For a man who doesnât speak, his eyes seem to say all that needs to be said, as he reaches for the end of your dress and starts to lift it, until you gently smack the top of his hand. Art draws his hand back to his side immediately, glancing up at you, looking a little like a kid that was chided.
Naughty of him, trying to get a sneak peek beforehand.
âNot yet,â You tell him.
Art looks a little irritated, folding his arms across his chest and pouting. At least he seems interested tonight.
You clear your throat, and Artâs attention is still locked on you. Heâs watching you expectantly.
âYouâve settled in quite nicely.â It was just yesterday you surveyed the area on his behalf, and helped him move in properly. Already on his workbench, he has got quite a few improvised weapons heâd been working on. Your eyes go to one weapon in particular, and you point at it.
âWhatâs that?â
Art turns to look at the weapon youâve pointed out, and when he lifts it to proudly show it, itâs exactly what it looked likeâan improvised flail. Attached to a long metal rod, is a long wire, and when your eyes follow to the end of the wire, you see wrapped around in such an intricate and meticulous way are a variety of knives, serving as what would be the âspikesâ. Youâre impressed. He even hands it to you, to which you take it. Itâs got a decent weight to it, too. Not too heavy, but not too light.
âWoah.â You say, as Art watches you, quite proud of how dazzled you are. Heâs an artist at heart, you knew this. The knives have some rust on them. One of them looks stained from a previous bloody encounter. Heâs clearly working with whatever heâs got on him.
âIf anyone survives this, they better pray they donât get tetanus.â You muse, and Artâs face twists in amusement in a silent laugh. You hand the weapon back to him, and he takes it once heâs done getting in a few silent chuckles at your joke, gently placing it back down on the table.
No one escapes Art with their soul still in their body. Literal or figurative. You were either dead, or you were burdened with his encounter your entire life, both physically and mentally.
You werenât any different. Your bruises and bites and scars have been out of love. One could argue that you got off easy, but youâd argue otherwise.
Being in love with the Miles County Clown is torture in and of itself. There were nonstop dreams that came with it. It seemed as if every other week heâd plague you in your sleep. Not to mention that you had to be extremely clever to not be caught under affiliation with himâwhich was even more stress. So far, though, so good.
Heâs worth it, you tell yourself. Even if he wasnât anymore, thereâs no way you could leave. Heâd kill you. And you have zero doubts that your death wouldn't be painless.
After a few seconds of silence, you sigh.
âI wish you didnât have to leave all the time.â You begin to tell him. Artâs expression is neutral, which isnât necessarily a bad thing. His teeth are bared, as they often are. Your tone isnât one of whining, but of yearning. You know that this came with the territory, and you readily accepted his lack of presence at any given time.
But it didnât hurt to dream. Art tilts his head, watching you from where he sits curiously.
âMaybe one day we can find some place that⌠Is ours. Separate from⌠This.â You gesture towards the weapons heâs making. Every so often he hides somewhere different to prepare for the trouble he intends to cause. âA place that maybe once youâre done for the day, we both can be in to unwind. And a permanent place for you that isnât just my apartment. But like. A place for you. For us.â
Taking him to your apartment kept getting riskier and riskier each time. Also, he made it quite clear he didnât really care for your decor. Giving him his own place to make his own that he could express himself would be ideal, and it wouldnât be like a place heâd have to abandon every year. He could actually have and keep stuff⌠If he wanted to even do that.
The more you think about it, the more youâre starting to think it sounds silly. You see the way that heâs looking at you, and he appears very stern. Sharp.
Your confidence begins to drop, and as youâre about to speak again, you stammer, before laughing nervously.
âYeah. Youâre right. Sorry, that was a silly ideaâany long term space we made for you would probably get found out eventually, too. Iââ
The stool screams as itâs slid across the ground, back towards the bench when he stands up. It sounded like one of his many victims. You go quiet as heâs hovering over you, and you swallow any words that you might have wanted to tell him.
The silence is heavy. His shoulders are rising and falling, and you feel your heartbeat in your ears.
Seconds tick by and they feel more like minutes, and you canât stand it any longer. You open your mouth to speak, but youâre swiftly cut off.
Art yanks you by the collar of your dress, and forces his lips against yours.
Your eyes are wide briefly in surprise, but they close as soon as you register whatâs happening, and you moan in the kiss. Artâs a bit of a sloppy kisser, but youâve come to love it. His taste was acrid as well, but you craved the bitterness at this point, no longer gagging like you used to. As he leans forward to kiss you harder, you put more of yourself in it as well, mixing his intensity with your passion and desire thatâs been left simmering for months.
Now itâs boiling over.
Art places both of his hands on either side of your face, and itâs like heâs trying to suffocate you with his kisses, barely giving you much time to breathe in between them. Youâre getting a little lightheaded.
He pulls away from your lips to kiss you a few times on the cheek, then nuzzling his face against yours. Almost like a cat.
It gives you the chance to catch your breath. His hands reach for yours, and you let him, feeling the way that his fingers interlace with your own. You look down at the way that your fingers intertwined with his dirtied and calloused ones. He was a man who worked with his handsâin more ways than one. Those same fingers belonged to the same hands that would worship you, tear and pull at you without ever breaking you completely in half. Sometimes itâd be close, but never fully. They would sometimes draw blood when the nails would sink into your flesh and leave behind crescent marks. Other times, those hands would strangle you, smack youâslap you, and bring a sting across your body that reminded you just how alive you were. Then those same hands would caress you. Cradle you.
Heâd cut you on a few occasions, but they were never lethal. And with every cut, his tongue followed.
You feel reverence. Especially as you press a kiss to the tip of his fingersâyou kiss each one, tenderly, making eye contact with him as you do so.
Art watches knowingly. He raises his head a little so that when he watches you, heâs looking down at you, all too aware of how you worship him. And he accepts it. But only from you. Just you. No one else.
After kissing each finger, from pinkie to thumb, you stop back at his index, soft lips pressed against the pad of it. His fingers were stained. Caked in whatever gore and dirt and grime heâd touched earlier.
Not that you cared, nor would you let it stop you. Youâre a freak. Not well in the head. Youâd lick any and all of his love off of the world's sharpest blade if thatâs the only way he gave it. If he wanted you to cut your tongue on it, you would.
Bringing his index finger to your mouth, you wrap your lips around it, and watch him. He tastes exactly how youâd expectâfoul and wretched. You catch the faintest hint of iron. A taste that youâve come to associate pleasantly with him. That part feels right.
Artâs gaze is fixed on you. You canât read his thoughts, and though he doesnât speak, you recognize what that look means. Even as he observes you, teeth bared subtly, head still held high, which he inclines just slightly as you take another finger in your mouthâhis middle one.
You suck his fingers lewdly, and close your eyes. You imagine itâs his cock, even though you know that his fingers canât compare to the real deal. You push your tongue through his index and middle as you take more of him in your mouth. Art watches your tongue work around him, until he decides to press down on the muscle, effectively stopping you.
You stare at him.
Seconds linger in silence, and he relinquishes pressure off of your tongue, letting you move it freely again.
And you do. You hold his hand and go back to kissing his fingers before fellating them. Index first. Then the middle. And finally the ring fingerâall three at once. The taste of iron is stronger. You sigh a gentle moan as you pull your head back and give him back his hand. You kiss at the tips of his fingers again. As youâre about to take his fingers a third time, he leans forward instead, his lips taking yours. You feel the way that he seizes both of your wrists as he floods your senses all over again, and you let him.
You try to say his name in between the kisses, but each time you get a breath between the barrage of affection that seems to practically swallow you whole, Art steals your voice with another passionate kiss. Again, his taste is bitter, his teeth are damn near rotten, but youâve gotten so accustomed to the flavor that it doesnât make you gag. It makes you feel only slightly sickly. But the arousal overrides any lingering discomfort.
Itâs disorienting. Itâs all so much at once. You feel your body temperature rise. Art gives you back one of your wrists, but in doing so, he places his hand at the small of your back and pulls you in against him, until thereâs no space left between you.
Thatâs when you feel it. You feel the heat of his erection pressed against your thighs. Youâve excited him enough, it being quite clear the effect your mouth had on him.
You smile, but his lips are back at yours again, and the taste of bitterness hits at the back of your tongueâthe most sensitive taste receptors lighting up and ripping any smugness you had straight out of you as you close your eyes and sigh softly. His tongue mingles with yours.
He begins to move, forcibly taking you with him as you change where youâre standing, so that heâs no longer the one whose back is facing the workbenchâitâs you. You feel the edge of the table bump against your ass. With your positions effectively switched, you donât mind at all, far too enraptured by the kisses of your clown lover.
This was pure bliss.
He pulls away from your lips, now kissing the corners of your mouth, then going to your jawline, until heâs at your neck, sucking and licking and nibbling, giving you goosebumps. You feel your nipples go hard. You close your eyes and moan softly.
This is the few times of the year that you get this. It was the time that youâd be peppered in kisses, ravaged, and torn asunder in such a way that it would take you almost the remaining however many days, months, or years until youâd see him again to put yourself back together.
âArtâŚâ You laugh a little when his lips tickle a part of your neck. He silences you again with his lips to yours. You feel the way that he nips at your tongue this time and draws a little blood. The endorphins from the pain gives you a pleasant buzz. He bites your bottom lower lip next, taking note of how heâs beginning to use his teeth more and more during this exchange, and you think about how heâs eaten the faces of his victims before.
You could be next.
He pulls away and kisses at the corners of your lips a second time. Heâs obsessed with using his mouth. Your eyes finally open, and you gently move your head back a bit, until Art finally stops, the both of you staring into each other's eyes. His teeth are bared all the same as they were before, but thereâs a sultry gaze youâre familiar with. Up this close, you can see the more subtle details of him.
Like his lashes, which otherwise, from a distance is obscured by the paint over his face.
How could someoneâor⌠Something, be so monstrous⌠Yet so⌠pretty? You could get lost in his gaze. You could drown in it. And he knows that. And he likes that power over you.
Your lips turn upwards into a soft smile, and you feel a desire pool at your groin. Itâs an undeniable throbbing in tune with your heartbeat. Nevermind that you can feel his own arousal against you. Heâs warmer than youâhe feels like heâs practically burning up, compared to you, and the body heat radiating from him only serves to make you hotter in turn. Right to the point where youâre developing a thin sheen of sweat across your brow.
âI love you.â
He watches you, and through his body language and eyes, you understand him through his reaction. You see a slow, smug smile appear on his face.
Very much an, I know. No sign of reciprocation. That would be too heavy of an ask from someone like him. But him being receptive to your love was a testament to how much he liked you.
Not that you expected anything less from a cold killer such as the Miles County Clown. The fact that he hasnât yet killed you throughout all these years speaks in a kind of love on its own, youâd think.
Maybe not the one that people would refer to as being actually in love, but for him, for Art, it was. Love was tolerance. Love was allowing you to live.
You feel a hand slip up your dress again, and this time, you donât stop him. You part your legs for him this time, willingly letting him indulge in what you denied him earlier. Through your panties you feel his thick fingers, his index and middle pressing against your clit, sliding down between your cunt and back up again. He threatens to penetrate you with the tips of his fingers through your panties with a gentle prod, but doesnât follow through on it.
You ache, feeling more empty than ever.
Heâs doing this on purpose. All because you told him to wait earlier.
âArt,â You say his name with a weak laugh, and he stops to look at you, knowingly, at that, well aware of what it is heâs doing. His little way of being petty with you, and he continues once more, trailing his fingers up and down between your thighs, waiting for you to continue.
âItâs been months,â You plead for him. His face is still inches from yours, and you lean more of yourself against him, as your voice gets low. He observes you through half lidded eyes, analyzing you, assessing you and sizing you up. Heâs no longer smiling, and his lips are downturned ever so slightly. The expression looks more neutral now.
âI wanna have some fun.â You purse your lips. âPut your weapon crafting down for a bit?â
Your tone is pleading. Itâs a mix of a command and a requestâyouâre voicing your thoughts. You try to get a reading on his response through his eyes, but heâs put up a wall that you canât breach. Heâs unreadable. Itâs been months upon months since youâve both done anything together.
ââŚPlease?â
Artâs gaze is still indecipherable. It makes you a little nervous. The hairs on the back of your neck begin to stand up. Did he change his mind suddenly?
Had it been anyone else, you know theyâd be dead instantly. There was no wondering about that. Not a speculation or doubt in your mind. You hated when he did this, when he was fucking with you like this, leaving you in silence. Itâs in times like these that youâre reminded that youâre with a wild animal, and he could snap at any second if he decided he was hungry. It was part of the risk you took and the bargain you struck.
Maybe heâd just stab you here and now. Slit your throat and call it a fucking day because he decided that, nope, donât wanna keep doing this anymore! He could. Again, heâs pushed you away before. Other days heâs yanked you in against him. His mood was unpredictable, hard to guess, and as volatile as a storm across an ocean.
Without another word, youâre turned around, and the flat of Artâs palm travels down your spine as he presses the front of your body forward and down onto the workbench. He gives you time to adjust, so that youâre at least able to rest your forearms on the table top. As of right now, your tits are squished against the surface of the table. Itâs a little uncomfortable.
This is surprisingly tender, all things considered. You remember one time when heâd been fucking you on his workbench, how he tied your hands together with some zipties and then choked you out by wrapping some rusty metal chains around your neck. And that was only after heâd finished whipping your breasts, thighs and ass until you were a bloody bruised mess barely hanging on. You still have some scars from those times. He loved to twirl you over the line of death like it was all one dance, pulling you back at the last second.
You go from feeling his palm to the fingertips travel down your back. If it werenât for the fabric of your dress in the way, you know those blood and dirt stained fingertips would have tickled you by now. And heâs done that in the past while fucking youâtickling you mercilessly. He even makes a point to wiggles his fingers a little against your back on the way down playfully. You canât help but laugh a little as you exhale, letting some of the excitement stirring within you leave your body through your lungs. Your breaths are getting deeper, and in times like this, when he thrills you in such a way, youâre reminded just how much he makes you feelâŚ
Alive.
Because when youâre with him, death is always hot on your heels. And you wouldnât have it any other way.
âDonât be gentle,â You tell him. He knows. You know he knows.
You hear the metallic zipper from the front of his suit go down as the teeth on the track separate and reveal the body of a man beneath that clown visage. You steal a glance over your shoulder to admire his pale skin that covered over such a thin frame. Amazing how a build such as his carries such supernatural strength.
Unceremoniously, he gets right to work, giving your ass a firm slap after lifting the back of your dress, letting it crumple up over your hips. You yelp gently as you know that thereâs likely already a red spot on your rump. Art rubs the spot on your ass heâd slapped, then gives it a gentle squeeze.
You make the decision to look over your shoulder, right on time to experience watching when the killer clown makes the decision that you no longer are in need of your panties. His dirtied fingers slip within the space between the elastic waistband of your undergarment and your skin. He lets it snap against your flesh onceâthatâs about the extent of use it gets before he grabs whatever meager fistful he can of that excuse of âmodestyâ you brought to him and rips it clean off your form.
âOw!â
You told him to be rough. And heâs planning on taking that quite literally, as heâs taking it for not just the sex, but all of what precedes it apparently. Heâs quietly laughing to himself, teeth showing, eyes crinkled.
âGlad you got some entertainment out of it.â
A few more noiseless giggles then he sobers up. Back to the task at handâfucking your brains out.
He aligns himself right up against your warm dripping cunt, hands gripping your hips so tightly that his filthy fingertips leave stains on your dress. His nails are so sharp you swear that if he tried to sink them in any further, heâd pierce the cloth and right into your flesh. You inhale sharply again, bracing for the moment he sinks in. You feel the tip of his cock press against you and begin to push in, the head barely getting the chance even to get inside you before it slips and glides between the crack of your ass as he misses. Your excitement stutters for a second, but then ramps back up higher than before, impatience and desire washing over you wholly like a wave.
Youâve been grabbing at the edge of the workbench, hands holding tight and then releasing them of their grip every so often to relax your muscles. You donât say anything.
Heâs annoyed at missing you the first push in.
With a look of disgruntlement he instead opts for one hand reaching to push your head down against the table with such a cruel force that makes you worry for a split second that he was trying to crush your skull. It was his way of trying to steady you as he then uses his other hand to line the head of his cock right against your cunt for the second time.
You shiver as you feel him, hands turning to fists that you clench tightly as inch by agonizing inch, he spreads you and fills you out easily. Your body did the heavy work, and has been prepping for him for the last ten minutes. Itâs slick, and he can feel the wetness of your cunt hit against his balls when he bottoms out within you. Thatâs when you sigh in relief.
He almost pulls all the way out, then rams into you roughly, making you exhale sharply as the table shakes upon impact. The few tools laid out shuddered until they stilled. Give or take a few more times of this, and he finally releases his hand on your head, but you still opt to keep your head down.
The rhythm he has is a little awkward at first, but he is quick to course correct, both hands firmly planted on your hips, keeping you steady. You canât see his face right now, but youâve seen it plenty of times when youâve fucked before. How his mouth would go into that âoâ shape, and the way his eyes would go half mast, holding nothing but a glimpse of paradise behind him as you could see that he was as close to heaven as his wicked self could get. You were beautiful to him, as far as sacks of flesh and blood went. And you could tell the times that he looked at you in such a predatory manner that there was restraint behind it.
You feel the pressure build up within you at a steady rate as he leans over you, chest pressed against your back, sucking on your neck, marking you. Then he nips. Then kisses, then sucks so goddamn hard on the same spot that you swear that heâs trying to suction your flesh right off your body.
It doesnât take long for you to be so close. Heâs so warm. The sound of his body slapping against yours, mixed with the creak of the workbench thatâs forced to undergo the assault of you being rammed into it, a few quiet moans slip past your lips to join along.
Youâre unbearably close, feeling yourself getting closer and closer to the edge, just a little more andâ
Your phone goes off.
You forgot to silence it.
You feel it vibrating in the pocket of your dress. The ringtone scares the shit out of you and Art, who abruptly jumps a little while still on top of you.
âOf course.â You say sarcastically. âOf course! Who the fuck is calling me?!â Youâre irritated now, mood under threat of being ruined. The excitement you felt shrivels up.
Reaching inside your hiked up dress pocket, you pull out your phone and check to see who had the audacity to try and get a hold of you in your time of undoing.
Your friend. Sort of. He was like a close acquaintance? If you could call him that. You met him when you were out and about one night. Heâs an okay dude, hasnât done anything wrong.
If only he didnât harbor a romantic interest in you when you were already spoken for. But how could you begin to tell someone that youâre involved with a psychopathic killer clown? Specifically the Miles County Clown?
Youâre ready to send him right to voicemail, until the phone is seized right out of your hand from over your shoulder.
âHey!â
Your protest is in vain, as Art too, looks at who is calling you right now. You had HOPED heâd take a look at it, have his curiosity sated, maybe turn the phone off or better yet, youâd even forgive him if he tossed it over his shoulder, just this once!
But the look heâs giving you, then the phone, makes your heart sink as you realize.
âArt, donât do itââ
His expression turns wicked, mouth upturned into the most shiteating grin youâve ever seen.
âArt, I swear to godââ
But godâs not here, nowhere to be found in this workshop. Godâs forsaken you. Doing the devils tango with a demon can do that.
Giggling silently to himself, in an act of deliberate defiance against you as well as likely for his very own amusement, he accepts the phone call for you and places it right to your ear.
What a gentleman. Truly.
Youâre going to fucking kill him. You try to take the phone away from him, but he merely pulls it back out of your reach.
âHello?â
You can hear the voice on the other end of the line. Art brings it down to your ear again and you try to make a reach for it a second time, only for him to do the exact same thing as before, silently cackling all the while. Itâs become apparent that heâs not going to let you have it.
âHellooooo?â
With a resigned sigh, you donât fight him any further. Art puts the phone to your ear for the third time.
âHey.â You answer wearily.
âHey!â His voice on the other end of the line is suddenly lighter, filled with levity. You can hear the way that his breath is hitched in the back of his throat. Static tinges at the edges of his words. Must be a shoddy connection down here.
âHow are you?â
âIâmââ You start to answer, but are interrupted by Art going back to rocking his hips into you while still over you. Once again, you look over your shoulder to give him the stink eye.
âIâm good, just uh, you know. Hanging out.â You respond, exhaling deeply as Art stirs the fire within you again after it had just begun to cool down.
âNice, me too.â He says, and lets the silence between you both sink in for a few seconds. âYou doing anything tomorrow?â
This would all be so much easier if you werenât getting dicked down.
âI⌠Iâm uhââ
Heâs pounding into you from behind now, still leaning over you, holding the phone for you in one hand and keeping the other on the workbench for stability. Each fluid roll of his hips is equally tantalizing as the previous, his body connecting with yours in such a familiar way you craved. The table shakes, and youâre gripping the edges of it for dear life. You can hear his heavy breath from behind you, excitement building in each time he fills and empties his lungs.
âArtââ You say his name through grit teeth like a warning, with annoyance in your tone, but the excitement you feel, the rush and the thrill of it all has you coming close to release. Why does this feel so good? This man, this sweet man, who has done nothing wrong to you, interested in you, blissfully unaware that your heart belongs to someone else, being fooled like this. Itâs wrong. This is wrong. Art knew about this man. He knew about him for some time. Art made it clear that he hated him. The only reason heâs still breathing is because you asked Art not to put this manâs head on a pike, but you fear itâs only a matter of time until your clown lover eviscerates this trespasser for encroaching on what he perceives as his territoryâyou.
âArt?" He repeats.
This is all an act of revenge done on the Artâs part. His pettiness knew no bounds.
âYeah, art. You knowâMhnââ Your nails dig into the edge of the workbench as if thatâll somehow make a difference in the fact that heâs pounding into your cunt with such an aggressive force that begins to make you ache.
âYou know, p-painting? Drawing. That sort of thing.â
You can only pray the ungodly sinful noises of his skin slapping against yours canât be heard over the line.
âOhhh⌠Well, hey, you wanna hangout sometime soon? Itâs been a bit. Wanted to catch up with you if thatâs fine.â
Youâre not paying attention to a damn thing this dude is saying. Itâs just words, in one ear, straight out the other.
âUhuh.â You say without thinking. Youâre close. Youâre unbearably close as Art angles himself in such a way that hits just right. He knows how you work all too well. He knows how to unwind you and how to pull you apart piece by piece like itâs second nature to him.
Artâs pushing you towards the cliff, and thereâs no stopping it. Your vision starts to blur a little. Your breathing deepens, and Art knows whatâs about to come next, which only seems to spur him on as well, exciting him to the point where now heâs going fast not just for you, but for himself, chasing his own orgasm hot on its heels.
âHowâs about next Thursday, at 7pm? Thereâs a new restaurant across the street from where we both metââ
The phone becomes nothing short of white noise. This shouldnât feel so right, it shouldnât. But it does. Gods above, it does.
You feel yourself lose sense of the world around you. Thereâs nothing but ringing in your ears, and you realize how little time you have to prepare before itâs too late.
Your orgasm crashes into you and is ripped out of you all within seconds. You try to keep quiet, your voice strangled and choked out in the process. Your release is violent as it tears you between what feels like the state of life and death. Your cunt tightens around his cock, squeezing him in contractions that trigger him in turn. Art hisses like a serpent, feeling his muscles lock up and knowing that he only has a few seconds to bury himself to the hilt within you, and he does. His face twists into an ugly and horrid expression as he comes inside you, dropping the phone on the workbench in the process while filling you with all the pent up energy he had been keeping away from you for months.
All of what heâd been denying you was now yours.
âHello?â
Youâre finally coming back into your own body a few meager seconds later when you register the voice, and hurriedly grab the phone before Art gets the chance.
âCan I call you back?â You ask, holding the phone to your mouth, but you werenât really asking. Your friend had no real say in it, and before he even gets the chance to respond, you hang up. And then you lower your head and sigh. All the while, Art has since recovered, but his legs are shaky. You shove him off of you, and he stumbles back with an uneven balance, post orgasm weakened. Goofily he fumbles past the stool from earlier, which he tries to grab but fails in doing so. Instead, he lands right on his ass.
Youâre sure to follow that up by throwing your phone at his head, which it does, but it lands with a clack right beside him. The only reason you felt remotely confident in doing that is because youâre both that close. Well, that and irritation made you a bold motherfucker sometimes. Yet despite all of that, he sits there, a wickedly amused smile on his face.
You pull your dress back down. Your legs tingle and you swear you feel some of his come dripping down your thigh, but youâre not sure.
âProud of yourself, huh?â You ask, leaning against the bench for balance until you get your footing.
Yes. Yes he was proud of himself!
The rest of the night was spent at Artâs temporary hideaway space, lamenting the loss of your panties and calling back your guy friend who had unknowingly been part of something much more than he knew. And youâd never tell him. Not that you would ever have the chance to tell him really anything at all anymore in the future.
You had no idea at the time that Art would meet your friend the day you were both set to reconvene. But you should have known better, and a part of you already did. The reason you know he was dead was because he ended up on the local news the next day missing.
That, and Art had saved the manâs heart specifically for you when you came to visit him again.
#art the clown#terrifier#art the clown x you#art the clown x reader#slasher x you#slasher x reader#x reader
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Ἅᥠ. # ۍ , ⸺ BLOMSTERTID, PART TWO !
summary :: Centuries-old mage, Y/N L/N, possesses magical abilities unheard of. A few citizens monopolize the remnants of magic they find, of which they now title âHextechâ. Hearsay of this power bleeds through all of Runeterra, until Piltover and Zaun find themselves in an anarchic war to obtain said power. Before Y/N can even blink, however, the humans neglect their plans when they realize theyâd rather have Y/N instead.
chapters :: the masterlist.
word count :: 10.9k
content warnings :: NO SPOILERS! yandere!viktor, obsessive!viktor, g/n reader, violence/gore, s3lf-harm, (very light) s3xual implications, needles, vomit, & terminal illness.
viktor's yandere traits are . . .
worshiper, heroic, & obsessive
â ・ Ë â ⸺ When the moon rises and the vibrant world eases, Viktor always finds himself dreaming of the same thing.
He imagines himself consuming the correct remedies and garnering the ability to walk, to run, to stand tall on his two feet. He is merely a child, but he is well aware of his weaker form. In the fragrance of these illusions, he can become capable and mighty; he can be the fearless warrior who protects his loved ones from lurking danger.Â
To heal and obtain strength â that is the haunting desire which paints his dreams.
The young boy now greets the sun in all of its blistering heat. The cloudless sky casts a shimmering glint upon the rusted scrap metal and bent screws of his handmade boat. Viktorâs frail hands place the creation upon the surface of a river stream. In the light of his childlike wonder, he imagines himself the captain, guiding his loyal crew across a grand sea overwhelmed with thunder and lightning. His dreams remain stagnant in his brain, though, where they have remained his entire life.Â
The jagged gears and sprockets hasten down the current before Viktor can bring himself to his wobbly knees. The boat has now accelerated to speeds little he cannot keep up with. When his crooked cane escapes from his grasp, he falls down with it. His nose aches from the harsh plummet against the ground and specks of tears begin to build in his bambi-brown eyes. He winces from the few painful jolts in his weak legs before he is finally able to stand once more.Â
When he searches, Viktor cannot find his beloved boat anywhere in sight. His eyes follow the stream ahead, which descends into an abysmal cave. He measures the weight of his options, but ultimately decides that his boat is too precious to abandon.
With a gulp, he carefully treads forward into the cave. Here, there is no light to guide him, only sound. And every drop of water and subtle echo of breath has his tiny heart hammering. He imagines some great, big, green-hued monster to crawl from the darkness and chow down on his thin bones. Viktor imagines the utmost worse to occur, but does not relent with his original intentions. He has to be brave, he asserts to himself.
When he rounds a corner, he spots a strange patch of light in the distance. Within this light, he recognizes the familiar cog of his boat peeking from behind a rock. He is moments away from cheering and celebrating the return of his greatest invention, until he notices the journey he will have to endure to retrieve the boat.
Viktor will have to squeeze himself through a narrow crack, threatening to release the avalanche of boulders from above. Still, he concludes his boat to be more important than his safety. He wastes no time in rushing forward to enact on such.
There is a struggle as he sinks down to lay on his stomach, but he captures success when he finds his small frame to fit perfectly through the tight gap. Chunks of rock protrude rudely into his emaciated form as he crawls, but he continues onwards. Viktor reaches his hand out, grasping air momentarily, before he finally lodges the wheel of his boat between his two fingers. With a soft âyes!â, he yanks the boat back into his possession.Â
Before he can leave, however, he finds something striking in his periphery. In its journey, his boat landed in a space overwhelmed with glistening crystals.
Viktor eagerly slithers himself into the expanse. Bringing himself to his feet, he proceeds to marvel at the sight before him.Â
The one fraction of the area that fascinates him the most is the great boulder directly in the center. It twitches and heaves with faded life, while radiating an aura of blue and purple luster. The opalescence is muted from its old age, but the sparkles still captivate him beyond belief. It does not take much to impress a boy raised in the lanes, after all. It is beautiful, Viktor thinks to himself.
And in the height of his desire for answers, he slowly places a hand upon the surface.
His vision abruptly goes dark and flashes of images then skim through his head.Â
Viktor sees a person, almost. They have jagged skin and colorful flesh, with swirling hues of blue and purple levitating from their open palm. The scars treading along their skin spell out some form of incantation. The letters are ineligible, but Viktor still attempts to grasp the meaning within the short spurts of clarity casted across his brain. Incomprehensible whispers in this language permeate from every corner of the cave, as though the bats have been assigned the task of delivering a message.Â
Viktor cannot grasp any of the statements spoken, but one word is emphasized with acute clarity.Â
Y/N.Â
There is a vision of a grand tree, bristling with life and color, before that image is replaced by his normal sight of the cave. The floors and walls surrounding him all rumble and vibrate, threatening to crumble. A few loose stones descend from the ceiling and nick his ragged clothing.Â
Viktor does not waste a second more before he is scrambling toward his point of entry. Squished through the skinny gap, around the several corners, and out the sunlit entrance â he has successfully escaped the crumbling cave with his boat held tightly in his grasp.
A thundering pain then sinks into his leg. The force brings him to the ground with a violent wince. When he looks to the source, he finds that his leg is in its normal condition. What he doesnât find, however, is his cane. Somehow, he had endured the entire escape without the support of his cane, which has now been swallowed by the tumbling rubble of the avalanche.Â
Viktor tries to catch his breath and find a feasible explanation. Was it adrenaline that got him to safety, or possibly⌠Magic?
The topic of this âearthquakeâ spread throughout the Under-City, before ascending into the glamorous land of Piltover. Without wasting a beat, Piltover swiftly claimed rights to the cave and utilized the expanse for resources, all of which Viktor watched from the high surface of a neighboring water tower.Â
Seeing the men work themselves to the bone, shipping off samples of what was his discovery, Viktor makes a promise to himself.Â
He will fight tooth-and-nail to cross the bridge of Piltover. Then, he will reclaim possession of those crystals and protect them as his.Â
He will succeed, he solemnly swears to himself.Â
In the span of the years that followed, this mysterious creature, Y/N, has ushered Viktor to chase after his brightest dreams: to heal and obtain strength. They have been his light as he guides himself to this goal; his lantern through a violent blizzard.Â
The journey to success began when Viktor first dipped a toe into adulthood.Â
The remaining years of his adolescence were spent in a ridiculous back-and-forth cycle with several prestigious schools in Piltover. Viktor was an exemplary student, that has been made abundantly clear. However, the elites in the academies were wary of his background as an Under-City citizen.
Time after time, he persevered past every expectation of him and flourished with flying colors. Viktor was prepared to stand outside their offices, down on his knees with fresh coffees in hand for their approval.Â
It wasnât until a few days after his eighteenth birthday were his efforts finally taken into account. It was through the eyes of Heimerdinger that Viktor finally received recognition, who offered the young scholar the role of his assistant.
Viktor accepted the offer with embarrassing speed.
The role of an assistant is not his dream, though. It is merely one stepping stone toward the finish line of his goals. These are facts he has to relentlessly remind himself of. Upon scrutinizing the failed efforts of a Talis scientist, however, he realizes how difficult this task is. Possibly bridging on the edge of impossible, if he is honest with himself.Â
After an abrupt explosion, Viktor was sent to study the materials used in Jayceâs experiments and verify their safety. He ventured into his isolated office and began his scrutinization of the notes and toolsets scattered around. A steel metal box, adorned with intricacies of blue and gold, calls out to his curiosity. Flicking the metal tab open, Viktor lifts the heavy lid and finds the very last thing he expected to see.Â
Held in copper claws are fragments of the crystals he discovered as a boy. All glistening and pulsating in those tones of blue and purple.Â
âY/NâŚâ The word crawls out strangled from his throat. Accompanied with his stuttering gasps, he has been rendered to a man absolutely breathless.Â
His hands tremble like a thundering earthquake as they take one of the crystals into his gentle grasp. And just like that, all the resentment and festering anger he harbored for Piltover had vanished. As though merely touching these shards provided him with the impossible tranquility found in forgiveness.
All he needed now was to return to you, then anything other than serene bliss can melt away.
Viktor offered (with a stifling fervency) to join Jayce in his efforts to learn more of this magic. From here, âHextechâ was born.
Many, many years have now passed since their partnership. In these years, only puny progress has been made in Viktorâs chase for his dreams. With what success theyâve grasped, theyâve managed to capture the attention of scientists and investors across the world.
Jayce, the born-and-raised Piltie he is, has claimed all credit for the perseverance of Hextech with loud, prideful words and his chest puffed out like a bird. He revels in the bouquets of applause and praise he is drowned in.Â
Viktor, on the other hand (and despite being the sole reason behind Hextechâs success), cannot find it within himself to care for Jayceâs entitlement. All he has ever cared for is you and the dreams you keep safely nestled in your palms. Everything else is immaterial.
2021 has now reached its lively Summer. Unfortunately, the goals Viktor set out for himself that year are miles away from fruition. His primary focus has been the runes he saw adorning your form and what definitions remain in every scratch. Translating the characters will lead to your location, he is positive of such.
With that being said, all these wasted days have been spent finding himself in the same dead ends heâs visited countless times. He can feel his worn body eroding with every passing second, with the glimmer of his dream now beginning to flicker with old, neglected light.
Home again, Viktor partakes in his evening routine before bed, a routine he has followed for years. The thick paper in his at-home office is used to its utmost value, where the ink of his pen bleeds his heart out onto the draped scroll.Â
If it werenât for his broad vocabulary and expensive handwriting, you would think these scrolls were the works of a teenage girl gushing about her crush. In reality, it is Viktor releasing the pent-up emotions heâs forced into captivity during the hours at work. Here, within the safety of his home, all of these feelings can be exposed in all of its ugly brilliance. His sentences may be frivolous, but they are overwhelmed with an ardent need.
Without realizing, he sometimes finds himself unconsciously sketching your face from his memories as a boy. That breathtaking, tragically enchanting face has haunted him beyond belief. And that is especially the case now, as he signs off yet another letter to you with his signature âYours Forever and Always, Viktorâ. He takes one last longing glance to your features he sketched over the romantic words.
Propping himself onto his cane, he curls the scroll into itself. He then treads to his bedroom and rests the scroll on the flower bed just outside the window. Joining this letter is another gift he addressed to you.
Viktor takes hold of his handmade boat he carried with him into adulthood. It is now miserable and rusted, but remains one of the most sacred items he owns. He nestles it safely beneath the thick hedges of the flowers, ensuring no gusts of wind or fluttering birds can disrupt its placement.
These actions are taken with one intention in mind: garnering your attention.Â
Surely, from wherever you may be, you will catch sight of the boat and be reminded of the connection you formed with him long ago. He is sure of this, despite waking every morning to the same, untouched flower bed. Still, this neglect is not anywhere near enough to hinder his efforts.Â
Slowly, he situates himself into his bed and faces his body toward the window. Sleep is something that rarely ever finds him, but in the midst of these rarities, he sleeps like a restless child on Christmas Eve. One day, Viktor will wake to your heavenly silhouette peering at him through the window. He falls asleep with this prayer ghosting his lips.
Another day of fruitless work is what he is met with the following morning. No soft, jagged hands stroking his hair or crooked smile to rival the early-day sun.Â
These failures, mended with the countless rough patches Hextech has faced in recent months, have taken a perceptible toll on Viktor. Again and again, he rearranges the runes of the Hexcore and provides it with a multitude of subjects to learn from. Still, he does not earn even a glimmer of a possible translation. All this effort forged into finding your whereabouts has resulted in defeat, yet again.
The hours of the day drag on in agonizing lethargy. The walls of the headquarters could almost resemble the metal bars of a prison. Here, however, the office space provided by Heimerdingerâs connections and Talis House money was far more luxurious than a dank cell.Â
A window with intricacies molded into the surface provides a blinding light from their high-view point in the city. The gold spheres painting the marble floors and bright walls could almost resemble eyes scrutinizing his every move. The space is vacant, except for the wide desk built into the wall with notes and gadgetry scattered about the surfaces.Â
The room is dull in comparison to others in the building, yes, but neither he nor Jayce had time to concern themselves with appearance. Maybe⌠Maybe youâll help with decorations when the time comes. Maybe youâll adorn these boring walls with those opalescent crystals and shimmering jewels of yours. You can provide this room with life, just the same as you did for him.
So engrossed in the bewitching pondering of you, Viktor fails to notice another person in the room. Sky, he thinks he can recall her name as. She rambles nervously about nonsense he cannot be bothered to discern. It is only when she treads a little too close to the Hexcore is he finally brought out of his inner turmoil. Her elbow unintentionally nudges a nearby house plant toward the Hexcore.Â
A scolding bridges on Viktorâs tongue, but is replaced by a suffocating silence when the Hexcore clings to the plant.Â
A bolt of purple springs from the runes and clasps to the plant like a hand, twitching as it absorbs the energy from the leaves. When the potted plant wilts, the Hexcore bursts with new energy and flourishes with greenery that reaches the ceiling. It radiates in the colors of blue and purple he knows all too well.
From the illumination is a character of one of the runes. Viktor watches in enraptured amazement as said rune unfolds and spells out something tangible.
âSAN TÂ RYâ, the letters speak.
Santry? Maybe it is an incantation or a phrase native to the language you speak, he is not sure. Nonetheless, the heavy ache in his chest eases and welcomes the light of excitement.Â
His brain dares to assume you would then somehow blossom with the flowery, there to breathe life into the dream heâs spent years striving after. Much to his horror, however, all the thriving organic matter soon withers away. As the decaying fragments descend, Viktor rushes over, discarding his cane. He clings to the dead remnants piling on the floor as though it were you who died in his hands.Â
As quickly as it had begun, it has now ended. And through the shocked silence, he is sure he can hear the tortured remains of his heart die alongside this damn house plant.
Still, the tortured soul does not impede his intentions of translating the runes of the Hexcore. If anything, his motivation has endured an incredible increase.Â
His crafted boat and another written scroll have found their home on his flower bed, once again, but Viktor is far from his bedroom. He remains in his at-home office, grinding the hours of the past week into understanding the meaning behind this groundbreaking discovery.Â
Why was there such a dramatic reaction to biological matter? Does this serve as a step forward in the direction of his dreams or does this eradicate all his original effort? Will he have to scour through every note he has written in the past decade to find something that explains this revelation?Â
And could it⌠Is it really you?
The runes scribbled on his notepad may as well have been chicken scratch. Despite his unwavering intelligence, he still cannot piece together the meaning of the characters the Hexcore had given him. At this point, translating a mere syllable would be enough for Viktor to shout âeureka!â from the highest building in Piltover.
âViktor.âÂ
Time stands still.Â
The voice that permeates through the office is almost strangled, as though his brain canât quite grasp what the voice actually sounds like. Still, it is an elegant conundrum of the most ethereal music he has ever heard. And he knows, he just knows where this beautiful melody has perfused from.Â
Oh, Y/N.Â
My angel. My dearest.Â
His brain begs for him to turn around and bless his vision with what he knows will be the most perfect sight heâll ever witness. His body, however, has been reduced to that of a frozen statue, completely stiff and still.Â
âLook at me.âÂ
The demand falling from your tongue erases all of that.Â
His body seems to move on its own, beginning to slowly, breathlessly, turn around. He knows it will be too much for his weak body to endure, yet still, he cannot stop himself. It is as though youâve plunged a hand into his nerves and began conducting his movements like a puppeteer.
Viktor finds you standing across the room and a sob is yanked from his chest. Your figure has personified in a mess of blinding brightness and confusing colors â a watercolor portrait detailing every speck of the word perfection. It strains his eyes to look at you. Yet still, he cannot bear to look away. Not now, not ever.Â
What is clear in his vision, though, is what you present in your hands. You hold the rusted boat he crafted as a child, with your fingers exploring the gears and cogs plastered against the scrap metal. As you fidget, you tread closer to where he sits. And with tears seeping down his face, Viktor watches your every move in absolute devastation.Â
âIâve been searching for this for quite a while.â You hold the boat in an admirable presentation. âFor you, as well.âÂ
His heart exhales, almost. As though something had been digging their tight nails into the gooey tissue and finally, finally eased their grasp.
When you bend down beside him, glorious face just inches away from his, Viktor can truly feel his freed heart melting down to puddled nonsense. Your hand then finds his cheek and you cup his boney face in your palm. Your touch feels like fuzzy static from the devices he tinkers with. Electrifying, and most imperatively, warm.Â
âMy beautiful masterpiece.â Your voice still remains a mellifluous scratch and punctures his soul with every timbre and tone.Â
He canât help but feel small beneath your gaze. Like a nasty insect. Weak, immaterial, and easy. Skittering across your flesh and ensnaring his prickly limbs around this grand sugar cube heâs stumbled upon. He is something so trifling in comparison to you. Potent, imperative, and intricate. Exuding saccharin with every step you take and indifferent to this foul pest lapping up any sliver he can get.Â
âHow could you let this drag on so long, Viktor?â You question. âYou were cut from the cloth of my flesh. Soaked in the rivers of my blood. There is no you if not me. You and I are one.âÂ
Viktor has been rendered to a man overcome with twitter-patted hysteria. He is shocked he is even still able to breathe, no less, maintain consciousness in a moment of such frenzied elation. No words escape him in response; all he can do is stare and revel at the sight heâs been slaving his entire life just to find a glance of.
Another euphoria-induced beat passes before you do the unthinkable. With a few measured glances to his mouth, Viktor watches in astonished rapture as your eyes flutter close and your mouth subtly parts. Then, you lean into him.Â
Just before your lips touch, impaling him with the inevitable exaltation heâll surely die from, he blinks and finds himself face-down at his desk.
Reality may as well have slapped him across the face.
A light, delirious gasp leaps from him as consciousness settles in. Viktor finds his lips puckered against his knuckles, where drool seeps from the corner of his mouth and onto the notes beneath his head. He buries his face into his hands with a jagged, frustrated groan.Â
Dreaming of kissing the partner of his dreams, is he a teenager again? Then again, youâve always had your clever ways of making him feel as such. This romantic disposition of his did not flourish until the later years of his adolescence, of which he assumed were the normal changes every young man faces. Then, as a mature adult, he can continue his efforts of translating the runes with complete clarity.
Bridging on almost two decades later, these feelings have yet to cease. Viktor is still horrifically and irrevocably in love. Not even the promise of heaven could help fizzle out these emotions. What is heaven compared to you, anyway?
He peeks his gaze through the creases of his fingers and finds he had fallen asleep on his planner. In the ink (now diluted and splotched from drool), he finds the date of the fundraiser he had promised Jayce to attend. With a glance at the clock, he realizes he has several minutes to prepare himself until the event begins. Another groan rumbles from his throat.Â
All Viktor wants is to return to the dreamscape of your enchanting words and magic-spun lips. Is that too much to ask for?
Dusk has now begun to fade down the horizon, illuminating the artwork of Mel Medarda in a scintillating glow. The art is irrelevant to all, however, as scientists and engineers across the globe have traveled here to sell their million-dollar ideas to Piltoverâs greatest investors.Â
Viktor now stands behind Jayce as they saunter through the gallery, stifling a grunt with every dry conversation heâs unnecessarily dragged into. The scientist theyâve found themself shackled in a conversation with trails on about his success in other nations. He is quite famous for his fruitful discoveries and resolute intelligence, but Viktor could not care less about what this stranger has to offer them.
Standing here, idle chatter and rich laughter perfusing from every corner, all Viktor can find himself thinking of is you. He juggles with the reality of the previous events, trying to differentiate whether it was another sugar-spun dream or a message sent straight from your pen. Heâs never had a dream so explicitly vivid before, after all. Could it have been a sign? Was this your reciprocation? Do you truly possess the same feelings for him as he does for you?Â
âThat sounds incredible. Doesnât it, Viktor?âÂ
A nudge from Jayce and Viktor is barely yanked back to reality.Â
âEhh, yes. Yes, it doesâŚâÂ
Without another click, Viktor then returns to his favorite place: the thought of you.
That dream was the encapsulation of his greatest desires falling into his palms. The only proof he has that it was an actual dream and not reality were the current speeds of his fluffed-out heart. To witness you through his naked eye, to feel the genuine touch of your hand, to mold his needful lips against yours â it would kill him instantly. The fact that he is still alive now is all the evidence Viktor needs to realize that, unfortunately, it was just another dream in a sea of thousands.Â
This does not halt his brain from soaking in the contents of his dream, however. All he could think about in the midst of this stupid cocktail party was your face, your body, your voice. God, could there be anything so indubitably perfect in this world?
And your kiss, oh, the things Viktor would do to receive such vehement affection. Your presence is enough to kill him, yes, but your kiss would revive him, just to kill him all over again.Â
A delicious juxtaposition between life and death â that is what you are made of. This lethal, intoxicating essence swims through your veins and weeps from your soul; it is a weapon any sane man would be ecstatic to succumb to. Viktor surely would, he has no hesitation with his judgment. He merely thinks of your face and is moments away from collapsing to his knees.
A server treads by with a platter hoisted over their shoulder. On the surface are several gold-painted champagne glasses. Viktor has no second to think before the server is shoving one of the glasses into his hands, no regard for his resistance.Â
He makes the motion to grasp the server's attention and return the glass, but something about it stops him. Twirling the glass in circles and watching the liquid swirl with the motions, he finds himself entranced. Viktor has never been one to drink alcohol, as it does more harm than good for his feeble body. With this glass now in his hand, he canât prevent himself from contemplating the flavor. And perhaps the flavor could even be similar to you, maybe.
Would your kiss be as smooth as the thick liquid? Would it sting like the bubbling effervescence of the champagne? Just like the bolts of fervent electricity he garnered from the Hexcore? Would it be rich? Sour? Sweet? Maybe a mouthwatering collision no one has ever tasted before?Â
Viktorâs mouth waters as these thoughts invade his brain. If he were correct, heâd bottle the essence and get himself drunk on the taste for eternity. Even if it was poison, he would welcome the paradisiacal venom with a sun-bright smile.
Just before his lips meet the edge of the champagne glass to truly test what his angel may taste like, something captures his attention.Â
The words âHextechâ and âsellâ should never exist within the same sentence, yet Viktor hears them crystal-clear from the mouth of this scientist. All bubbly, blissful nonsense frolicking through his mind is brought to an abrupt cut.
Viktor has caught the man halfway through a proposition regarding the sake of Hextech.Â
âJust between us scientists, you can tell me the truth. Youâre surely getting nowhere with your experiments in that cramped office, no?âÂ
Viktor tries to intrude and bring an end to the idea before it is even spoken aloud, but he is rudely interrupted.
âImagine how much prosperity and success you can bring to the Hextech name with me there! All the profit youâd earn with my skills and experience.âÂ
His nails dig violently into his palm as he drags on with his proposition. Like hell will he let some greedy capitalists put his hands on what sliver he has of you. It hurt to simply let Jayce touch the Hextech materials, despite the fact they were originally in his possession in the first place. To send it overseas to god-knows-where would wound him in ways he would never heal from.
A brutal rejection bridges on Viktorâs tongue. Maybe even a foul remark to add insult to injury. When he glances at Jayce, however, he finds the man's expression to be scrunched into puzzlement. Almost as though he were considering this scientist's offer.Â
A sharp shatter then pulsates through the room.Â
Viktor looks to his hand and finds he had shattered his glass in the height of his fury, cold champagne seeping down his folded sleeves.Â
A few partygoers fall silent and look at the sudden intrusion of volume, but soon return to their chit-chat when nothing feasible comes from the noise. Jayce, on the other hand, wastes no time in trying to inspect the glass shards punctured into Viktorâs pale palms. He yanks himself away before he can place a finger on him, however.Â
âNo!â Viktor asserts.Â
He is not embarrassed of his outburst, either, despite how composed he presents himself to be. Not when you are on the line. How could he ever remain calm with this prospect knocking on his door?Â
A sharp glare to Jayce and the man begins fumbling through an explanation.Â
âI-I never said we would take the offer, just that-âÂ
âJust what, Jayce?âÂ
Viktorâs voice increases in volume. Eyes follow, but he does not care.Â
âIt-Itâs just⌠Iâm worried, Viktor. You are clearly not in good shape and I donât think the future of-â
Viktor swings his frail arm behind him before surging it toward Jayceâs face.Â
The punch does not land, as Jayce dodges it with ease, ultimately resulting in Viktor to trip over his leg. He lands on the marble floors with a violent thud, piercing pain spreading through his sensitive body upon impact.Â
All eyes are locked on the two now, hushed whispers drifting through the silent room. As fast as it had begun, it was now over.
Jayce attempts to assist his partner, but Viktor bluntly slaps his helping hand away and brings himself to his feet. If he has proved anything over the past decade, it is not Jayce he needs. It is you and only you. When he is met with the possibility of losing you, he cannot restrain the rampant, infuriated emotions coursing through his bloodstream.Â
Viktor then limps out of the building with rage still perfusing from him like a thick perfume. Jayce acquiesces, but does not attempt to follow his lab partner. The Talis name cannot be tarnished, after all.
He apologizes to the scientist with shame plastered across his expression. With a paranoid glance over his shoulder, he speaks in hushed tones and proposes the topics they spoke of beforehand.
Meanwhile, Viktor hastens to the sanctity of his home. It is the only safety he has been nestled with in the trajectory of his life. It is all done by your hand, as his home is where you are. Yes, with a slyly-sewn excuse, he was granted permission to keep the Hexcore in his possession, of which he wasted no time in snagging away. Now, he will protect and nurture this fragment he has of you by whatever means necessary.
Viktor soon trudges past the threshold adjacent to his living room, the mahogany doors creaking as he does so. Sauntering through, he is then met with an instantaneous peace.
His library is the place he possesses the utmost pride for, since all books present have been written by his hand. Here, every etch of ink correlates to you.
You are not something he can contain within the whorls of his mind, no. You must be expressed in any form of physicality Viktor can garner. Writing assists him in translating the runes, but it also serves as another desperate attempt to assure himself you are real and not just some psychic phenomenon he experienced as a child. You are real, you must be. You do not have a choice.Â
Many of the books detail your physicality, as much as his fuzzy, muddled brain can decipher. Other books are unorganized gibberish regarding your whereabouts. The runes, the crystals, the Hextech â all this science is just stepping stones leading him closer to you.Â
The other pieces, the more hidden ones, are for more frivolous exertions. Nights when these fantasies cloud his mind, he jots them down in messy splotches of ink and marvels at the ideas he bleeds onto paper. Said ideas are too intimate for him to revisit without flushing like a young boy stepping into the world of puppy-love. Nonetheless, they assuage him on the lonelier nights cramped in his office.Â
All of these books overwhelm the several isles of shelves within the grand library. Through the warm wood and soft lamplights, Viktor rushes past and does not bother to drag his thin fingers across the leather spines, as he usually does in admiration of his work. Instead, he rushes to the set of double-doors opposite to the other doorway.
Through this entrance is his at-home office; the room in which most of his time is spent. The area is nothing short of dull, but serves its purpose â that being supporting Viktorâs hard work and delusional fits.Â
That is certainly the case now, as the man chucks his cane to the ground and collapses onto a neighboring sofa. The materials are bristly and jut into his skin uncomfortably, but he cannot find it within himself to care. Not when his precious Hextech is at risk of being sold off like livestock. Not when you are moments away from being shoved onto a ship and sent overseas.Â
âRidiculous. Selling you? How dare he even consider it!âÂ
Viktorâs gaze finds the rolling chalkboard situated just beside his desk. On the green surface is a sketch of your face, drawn perfectly centered in the mess of numerous equations and jotted formulas.
âThere is not enough money in the world- in the galaxy for me to even consider disposing of you!âÂ
He stands to feet, wobbling slightly, before he limps over the chalkboard. He rests a gentle palm upon the surface where your cheek would be.
âNo⌠Never youâŚâ
Viktor had not realized how shockingly realistic the drawing of you was until this moment. All the hours spent sketching your face have resulted in him becoming quite savvy in his artistic abilities, as it shows, to a degree where he finds himself captivated with the sight. As though you were standing right before him, just as you were in his dreams.
âNever youâŚâ His thumb caresses the jut of your traced cheekbone. âPerfect, magnificent youâŚâÂ
With a light thud, his weary head lands against the board, where your foreheads align. From here, the neglected taste of champagne then returns to his memory. Truly, how would you taste? What emotions would he be flooded with if his dreams werenât so rudely halted?Â
Viktor is now breathing heavily before the chalkboard, practically panting against the rugged surface. The idea of kissing you is not foreign by any means, but as he is still fresh out of the arms of his fuzzy dreams, his body cannot restrain itself from reacting dramatically to the concept.
He then presses a languid kiss to your chalk-drawn mouth. Sure, the surface may not have the softness and jagged texture he is certain you possess, but the concept alone is enough to get his heart burning.Â
Viktorâs mind becomes overwhelmed with the thought of you, like some hungry parasite latched into the fleshy grooves of his brain. How youâd taste, like lapping up the juice seeping from the forbidden fruit. How youâd feel, like the warm blanket of heavenâs clouds embracing him. Viktor is overwhelmed with the contemplation of everything; all the madness and repose that would follow with your lips on his.
The kiss hastens, until he begins utilizing his tongue in the state of vehemence. Thick chalk pervades through his mouth, but he is too far muddled by the fantasies bleeding through his head to pay any mind. He is messy and inexperienced with his mouth, yes, but the feverish need seared into his affections eradicates any nervous ticks or fearful hesitation.
Viktorâs efforts are abruptly cut short when he is overwhelmed by a coughing fit. He failed to anticipate how his fragile body would react to the thick chalk. It is an inevitability he should have realized sooner, had he not been so blissfully blinded by the imaginary, dusty lips of his lover.Â
What was expected as a few coughs to rid his throat of the dust resulted in him choking on rugged gags. His body slams against the surface of his desk as a desperate means for support.
Blots of hot blood and chunks of chalk amalgamate and splatter out from his retches. Far too light headed to notice, a few drops of this excess land on the Hexcore. Immediately, it begins pulsating with new life. From this vibration, a heavenly aura of violet and blue perfuses and sways in languid circles. A new set of runes he has never seen before join the cloud of color, which spell out incomprehensible letters as they glisten and churn.Â
This sudden change soon grasps Viktorâs attention, who is now met with a new sense of clarity upon discerning the sight. When the revelation simmers, he may as well have died right at his desk.Â
âOh, dearestâŚâ A wide, almost manic smile stretches on his thin face. âIs it me you need?âÂ
The emotions swarming through his body have rendered him weak, but he has never known strength like he does in this moment. Viktor should have known from the beginning: you have always been calling out to him. It was never the measly plants that triggered a reaction, it was him! It was always him!Â
And so fervently will he give himself over to you. Whatever it is you desire, Viktor will personally deliver on a golden platter. He will be your warrior and your servant; he will set the world ablaze to ensure your happiness.
âY/N⌠I promiseâŚâÂ
Viktor collapses before he can bring this new revelation to fruition.
The sounds of a robotic beeping is what greets Viktor next. The steady rhythm guides him as consciousness pervades his body. Through his blurry vision, he finds white walls, white floors, and himself in a white bed beneath white sheets. Everything is stale in its dull, depressing appearance.Â
Turning his heavy head, he finds a figure seated beside him with their head buried in their hands. A glimmer of hope sparkles through him.Â
âY/N?âÂ
Jayce raises his head with sharp speed and Viktor is met with acute disappointment. He fails to notice the trepidation and pity in his partner's eyes.Â
âViktor⌠The doctors, they, uh, they saidâŚâÂ
He sinks further into the mattress. His goals, his dreams, everything he has ever wanted â none of it will be his.
Even beneath the weight of shocked grief, all that permeates through his weary head is you.
The runes inked on your flesh, how heâll never caress them. The crooked frame of your smile, how heâll never earn it. The contours of your jagged hands, how heâll never hold them. The symphony of your musical voice, how heâll never hear it. Viktor will never be able to have the one thing that matters most to him and this fact punctures him worse than any weapon forged by man.Â
âI-I know- I know you donât want to hear this right now, butâŚâÂ
Viktorâs waiting gaze deepens. âButâŚ?âÂ
Jayceâs eyes dart around the room, searching for something other than Viktorâs eyes to look at. With a deep breath, he breaks the silence.
âHextech is going nowhere, Vik. We just keep finding ourselves at dead ends and clearly, it's taking a toll on-!âÂ
âWait, what are you suggesting?âÂ
âWhat Iâm saying isâŚâÂ
Jayce stammers before finding the words to speak.Â
âSome scientists arrived overseas and I gave them a tour of our office. I think we should-âÂ
âYou what!?âÂ
âI-I just showed them around and they provided some guidance. All Iâm saying is that I think itâd be best for us to-âÂ
âAbsolutely not! I will not give up Hextech!âÂ
The beeping of his heart monitor accelerates.Â
âYouâre not listening, Vik. There is no you, anymore.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep.Â
âWhat is that supposed to mean!?âÂ
Beep, beep, beep.Â
âWith how much⌠time you have left, I-I made the decision to give your role to one of the scientists.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep.Â
âIâm sorry it had to be like this.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.Â
âNo, no, Jayce. Please- Please donât do this.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.Â
âIâm sorry, but I promise this is for your own good.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.Â
âI will do- Iâll do anything, Jayce, donât- donât do this to me!âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.Â
âThereâs nothing I can do, Vik. Itâs out of my hands.âÂ
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beepbeepbeep.Â
âWeâll be collecting the Hexcore from-â
BeepbeepbeepBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP-Â
âI WONâT LET YOU HAVE THEM!âÂ
Viktor falls to the tiled floor, his shout spurting out like a glass shatter. Sharp and ragged, it is a tone he cannot recognize; the picture frame displaying the heart-shattering devastation of his unmet dreams.Â
The tubes strapped to his narrow limbs snap and spring into the air. Tears seep down the jagged juts of his cheekbones. Viktorâs slender, ghastly fingers grip the edge of the bed frame and he drags his limp body forward. Crusted fingernails dig into the ankles of Jayce, who abruptly stands from his seat and cowers away from the crazed man.Â
âTheyâre mine!âÂ
The door bursts open and a gaggle of nurses and doctors follow the intrusion. They swarm into the scene like a school of fish darting away from the jaws of a great-white. Before Viktor can merely blink, they ensnare their hands around his thin body and restrain him to the cold ground. Despite his resistance, the needles of their syringes glint in the glow of the lamp.Â
Jayce mumbles another apology under his breath before he scurries away from the mess he has made.
The night passes quietly. So quietly, in fact, the staff that had stuffed Viktor with needles before had forgotten of his existence altogether. The door to his room has remained closed since their departure, and obliviously, they remain unaware of what remains beyond that threshold.Â
Just after the clock strikes three, the door peers open. A tiny squeak perfuses through the lengthy halls of the hospital, but the quiet night does not react to this intrusion. A head of brown hair peeks out from the opening. Assuring the coast is clear, Viktor takes a careful step out. He takes another, then once more, before he finds himself in a hurried limp out of the premises.Â
The streets are cold and unforgiving. Every street lamp and drunk pedestrian has his heart hammering. The sight of a horribly-emaciated man in a hospital gown will surely raise a few eyebrows, but nonetheless, he perseveres. As he stated before, nothing else matters when it is you on the line.
Viktor soon reaches the doors of his home. He wrestles with the key momentarily before the lock clicks and heâs barreling through the entrance. It is a weakened effort, but he rushes through his home and arrives at his office. When he finds his beloved equipment safe and sound, he releases a pent-up sigh of relief. His lanky hand rests upon the arm of the neighboring couch, as his body is just mere inches away from sinking into unconsciousness.Â
Viktorâs gaze, swaying with dizziness, then finds the rendition of your face he sketched on the chalkboard (which has since been smudged by the works of his mouth, but not that heâll ever admit that to anyone). In a dazed attempt at finding your chalk-ridden lips again, Viktor begins to limp over to the chalkboard. In his efforts, his weak body fails him and his hands reach for his desk to maintain his balance. Here, he is greeted by the sight of the Hexcore, still glistening and pulsating with its hues of blue and violet. Still beautiful as ever, he thinks to himself.Â
He sits himself in the adjacent chair and continues to marvel at the runes illuminating the dim room. Viktorâs brain, always hungry, then treads toward the runes etched into your flesh, spelling out the same vocabulary scribbled across his desk.Â
As a child, he always wanted to be you. His mother often found him etching these runes with markers across his arms and legs, scolding him as she scrubs the doodles. As an adult, however, he found heâd rather be with you. Now, those inked stains have since washed away and he canât help but ponder over their permanence.
An idea then flickers in his brain.
Viktor grasps the letter opener left languidly on the surface of his desk. With a few rushed breaths of fear, restless assurances begin permeating his brain. He no longer has a choice anymore. A second more of waiting and youâll be ripped from his weak hands like candy from a baby. Spending his entire adolescent years without you was torturous enough. To do so for the rest of his lifetime will kill him before this illness does.Â
He faces this revelation head-on and begins reminiscing about the day he spoke to you. The day you truly spoke to him, no dreams or fantasies in sight. When you grasped one of the plants on his desk and gifted them life, before scribbling out a message just for him.
âSAN TÂ RYâ, you spelled out in magic runes.
Forever the mad scientist he is, Viktor has dissected every scratch and itch of this rune, trying so desperately to decode your letter. Now, things are different. There is no âtomorrowâ to start anew, there are no more second chances. All he has left is tonight. And he will stop at nothing to understand the words you whispered to him.
The tip of the letter opener punctures into his thigh with a wet squelch. A muffled groan of pained agony fights against his clenched teeth as he finishes carving the first character. Then, Viktor moves onto the next. Moist blood seeps down his thighs and spills onto the marble floors as he continues, spreading like the excess of a thick soup.Â
Sweat cascades across his body. His legs begin to quiver. The blistering ache almost becomes a second home. Still, Viktor refuses to relent and soon, he sits in a pool of his warm, oozing blood and gapes at his work of art. Sloppily engraved into his pale-white flesh are deep-red incisions spelling out your last distinguishable message.Â
A sense of pride fills his chest at the prospect of displaying his level of reverent devotion to you. At the prospect of earning his place at your side, to a degree where the pain seems like an afterthought. Huffs of lightheaded, delirious laughter fill the empty silence. Unbeknownst to him, a lazy finger makes contact with the Hexcore.
The Hexcore then begins to tremble, palpitating like the speeds of Viktorâs heavy heart. A light then floods from the runes and drowns the room in its blinding effort. Through the flashes of white, Viktor is overwhelmed with visions of an uncharted territory. Tall trees align the edges of a pathway, where whispers of incomprehensible incantations dance with the cold winds.
âSAN TÂ RYâ, the phrase that has haunted him for weeks, finally receives its final pieces.Â
A few bolts of prismatic lightning from the Hexcore and the word âSANCTUARYâ glistens in a blinding presentation on his thigh.
And without another second wasted, that is exactly where he rushes to.
On the outskirts of the Under-City, Viktor stands at a clearing in a deep, overgrown forest. The trees that swayed in his vision from before are identical to those here, aligning the path he has been treading on. Blood continues to hasten down his thighs and into the dirt beneath his bare feet. Despite the searing pain, he continues forward. With the inevitability of losing you just upon the horizon, no pain in the world could falter his efforts now. The fear is more formidable than any torture he could endure.Â
As he continues limping forward, the ground suddenly begins to rumble violently. The force of it sends him to his knees, his frail hands digging into the soil for stability. A whirlwind then sprouts from the ground, forming a thick cloud of dirt and wind around him. Viktor cowers into himself in a desperate attempt at protection.
This tornado accelerates and spreads, engulfing him in its entire wrath. Roots then pierce out the soil and stretch into two tree trunks, chunks of dirt spattering upon the aggressive intrusion. The roots soar into the air and intertwine with one another, intricate grooves of warm brown slithering up their jagged bark. They soon meet and their limbs intertwine like two loving hands, forming an oval shape.
Just before he is sure the force of this whirlwind will take his body with it, the wind reaches its breaking point and bursts into the air. The storm has now been reduced to a gentle fog resting against the forest floor. The ground stops rumbling, the whirlwind eases, and Viktor can finally see the night sky in sheer clarity.
Trailing his vision forward, his attempts at standing are halted when he finds the newly-grown trees. The space within the oval has been filled by a sort of gray haze, almost like a portal. It is reminiscent of a surface of water, Viktor notes. Glistening like a midsummer lake beneath sunlight, with hues of violet and blue swirling around the edges. There are icicles descending from the leaves of the two trees like a weeping willow, as well, which sparkle in swaying hues of the same tones.
Scrutinizing further, Viktor is almost certain he can discern what lies beyond this newfound portal, but the mist is too distorted for him to reach a conclusion. When the image of you flickers through his mind, he garners strength he did not know he possesses. He then barrels past the threshold in animalistic speed. His vision is overwhelmed with a blinding white as he lands with a violent thump, before it eases back to its normal precision.Â
The clean pavement is harsh against his skin as he stands to his feet. Illuminated by heavy moonlight, Viktor finds himself on a quiet street. There are a myriad of shops and centers aligning the pathway as he saunters through. A library, a performance hall, an alchemistâs laboratory, a farmers market â an entire civilization has been cultivated right beneath the nose of the Under-City.
He limps over to several of the locations, pounding his fists on the door, calling out his lover's name, but none of his efforts are brought to fruition. Soon, he abandons his intention of entering the locked premises and continues onwards.Â
When he reaches the end of the street, Viktor discovers a tree that could touch the moon with its tall height. The trunk is almost as thick as a building with several holes punctured into the wood. From these holes, a blue and violet hued sap bleeds out and cascades into a fountain centered in front of the tree. Blossoming leaves adorned in these same colors stretch down from its branches and nearly graze the ground.
Through the leaves, golden lights flicker with warmth. Here, the broad branches of the colossal tree support the weight of several homes, all connected to one another with wooden bridges. One of the larger branches hidden beneath the canopy of leaves serves as a form of bridge. Surrounding this tree are towering mountains, which this bark-woven bridge leads to.
Viktor thought crossing the bridge to Piltover would reach the height of his amazement, but Topside riches have never left him this breathless. Then again, he has yet to find something that engrosses him with wonder the way you do.Â
When the tip of his foot collides with the edge of the fountain, he realizes he has been mindlessly wandering forward, too enthralled with the sights he has discovered to care for clarity. He attempts to scrutinize further, before his body is overcome with a sudden rush of lethargy. He collapses against the edge of the fountain and clings to the corners for stability. Blood seeps from his nose and oozes onto the pristine stone.Â
Before Viktor can scold himself for this disgusting weakness of his, two pairs of arms ensnare around his waist and hoist him to his feet. A sparkle of hope tells him it is you, but with flesh too smooth and bones too prominent, his delusions are brought to a halt before they could even run free. The appearance of these two remains a mysterious blur as they guide Viktor forward.Â
In his sluggish state, he watches his feet travel up the staircase wrapped around the trunk, limping past the lively houses, and across the bridge connecting the tree with the mountains. And passing this bridge was not reminiscent of his previous journey into Piltover, no. Had it not been these strangers keeping him upright, heâd have collapsed to his knees upon the newfound sight before him.
Nothing short of a palace has been built into the mountainside. Those familiar tones of blue and violet paint the expanse, accentuated with a rich gold. Stained glass windows reflect in the moonlight and irradiate the land in its colorful glow. Ensnaring the walls is a beautiful ivy, where Dusk-Petals and Moonflowers adorn the growing vines and blanket the intricate, elegant architecture.Â
A grand waterfall descends from the mountains above the palace and into the several rivers spreading throughout the land, meeting the fountain below in its journey, as well. The palace is almost a moat, but the sea of trees disturb any attempt of obtaining the title. The trees resemble the several he has already seen with drooping leaves and twinkling icicles, painting the land in heavenly hues of that familiar azure and violet.Â
It is far more extravagant and palatial than anything he has ever seen in Piltover. It is more grand than anything he has ever seen in his entire life, for the matter. He couldnât conjure a better estate for you than this, as you deserve to rest in the pinnacle of luxury and opulence. And this palace is not lacking in those areas in the smallest slight.Â
Dragging forward (as Viktor has completely abandoned using his feet anymore), they pass through the stone-carved doors and enter the palace. Once through the entrance, Viktor begins to study the interior. And the interior is an almost perfect reflection of the exterior.Â
Blue and violet permeate the expanse through surrounding furniture and decor, most of which support the weight of art sculptures and trinkets Viktor fails to discern in his lethargic state. They go hand-in-hand with the spreading greenery, which you have evidently and happily allowed to perfuse throughout the entire place.Â
These details spread through the several twists and turns these helpful strangers drag Viktor through. They finally reach a halt in one of the numerous rooms.. Softly, they loosen their grasp and guide him to the ground. They promptly take their leave without a single word spoken.
A greenhouse is where he has found himself, he assumes. The walls and ceilings all consist of windows, with intricate white frames woven across all surfaces. The edges of the stone pathways beneath his feeble body are adorned with hedges and flowers, all varying in different colors. They compliment the wisteria drooping from several miniature trees, their thin branches adorned with several ornaments that exude a golden light.Â
Languidly bringing himself to his feet, once again, he finds one of the larger wisteria trees hovering over a pond. It resides in the corner with a small arrangement of rocks surrounding the edges, supporting the stream of a small waterfall leading into the pond. Here, birds surround the stream and bathe their feathers.Â
The embodiment of tranquility, that is how Viktor would describe this. He almost considers the possibility he had died in that hospital bed and this was the heaven waiting for him. All that is missing in his nirvana is you- oh, God, itâs you.
Simply shifting his gaze to the left, he finds a slab of stone residing in the middle of all this greenery. Upon the surface are several clay pots and cloth-woven bags overflowing with fertilizer. And tending to these products is no other than you.Â
A strange, overwhelmingly perfect light radiates from your body. Beneath this light, he finds you are draped in a cloak of varying adornments, all shimmering in opalescent hues. There are jewels and crystals sewn into your torso, pearls and wind chimes dangling off shoulders. There are feathers draped down your arms, with seashells aligning your ankles. Harp strings are woven around your every limb and tied into pretty knots. Your body is a centuries-old story told through the embellishments aligning your flesh.Â
And Viktor, oh Viktor.Â
No words could encapsulate the ethereal, deific, uncanny, godlike emotions this moment has overwhelmed him with.Â
There is no room to merely think with these feelings suffocating his brain. It is as though the melody of your love has swelled in their highest magnificence, the Dusk-Petals and Moonflowers blossoming into its most surreal beauty. It is the perfect moment.
Everything he has ever wished for conjured up into a single creature; the light at the end of the tunnel every sorry soul dreams of reaching â he almost doesnât even believe it to be true. As though the creeping hands of his desires have ensnared their hands around his throat, allowing him one last morsel of illusory bliss before his life fades.Â
When you then turn over your shoulder, blessing him with the sight of your beautiful, tragically beautiful face, there is no denying the authenticity. This moment leaves a harsh toll on his physical state, as well.Â
Viktorâs eyes begin to roll back into his skull, but he strives against the force to continue indulging his vision in this glorious sight. Nausea pulsates in his stomach like a wrangling insect, but a few hard swallows keep the sickness at a weak bay. His knees tremble, threatening to buckle once again, but he maintains his posture with acute effort.Â
It is a battle against him and his body, of which inevitably, leads to failure. Throat pulsing with gagged coughs, Viktor then leaps to the ground and finds a nearby, empty plant pot. He empties his guts into the container. The excess looks like coffee grounds; all blood-stained and chunky. Guilt and shame are expected, but they have no room to thrive. Not when you are here.
He is, in fact, met with the very opposite when he watches from his periphery as you tread closer and bend down to his level. Weakness overwhelms him as he begins to digest more of your physicality. His body sways again from the weight of it all, beginning another descent back to the ground. You halt the motion by catching his cheek in your palm. The effort is enough to set his skin aflame, with a simultaneous bitter chill tickling down his spine.Â
His body is overwhelmed with these suffocating emotions, but is also blissfully light and peaceful. Horrifying euphoria stirred with devastating tranquility â a delicious juxtaposition.Â
And the way Viktor looks at you could rival the most devoted of religious followers finding the face of heaven. Eyelids lazy and drooping, framing the glassy tears building in his honey-brown eyes. His gaze is buried into you, more attentive than he has ever been with his brows furrowed into a weak, stuttering curl. Mouth hung agape in fervent shock, drool pools on his tongue and his bottom lip trembles like a child who skinned their knee.
He doesnât even think before heâs leaning in to kiss you.Â
âThis was not an easy effort, I can imagine.âÂ
His intentions are bluntly interrupted, yes, but he could not have imagined a better way to be halted. A deific incantation, a call straight from heaven, a harmony the world's best musicians have devoted their whole lives trying to emulate â that is how Viktor would best describe the tones that drift from your lips. In fact, your voice catches him off guard to such an aggressive degree, he forgets he had even tried to foolishly kiss you in the first place.
âIf I may ask, how did you find us?âÂ
A flurry of words drift through Viktorâs head, toppling out of his mouth through stuttering gasps and pathetic attempts at the human language. It all becomes a mess of English and his mother tongue the further Viktor trails on of how he found the sanctuary, his first encounter with you as a child, and all the turmoil he gleefully endured just for this moment. Sprinkled in with gallons upon gallons of praise, of course.Â
There is some clarity, however. Fragments, albeit, but he does manage to establish coherency. One statement strikes abundantly clear.
âMy Y/N, there is not a line in the world that I would not cross for you.âÂ
And of course, inevitablyâŚ
âI love you.âÂ
Those three words, heavier than the world heâs been blessed to stand on with you, continuously tumble out of his mouth. Viktor repeats the same sentiment again and again and again, each time possessing the same heart-shattering devastation.Â
You do not react, however. Despite his wishes for you to be overcome with euphoria upon receiving his confession of devotion, all you do is stare. You do not return his affection, either, but he is too muddled to notice this.Â
âYou work beside Jayce Talis, correct?âÂ
Viktorâs eye twitches. A flicker of betrayal catches flame, but the ignition is weak.
âThen, I am sure you have heard the Council speak about the influx of âShimmerâ, as they have titled it.âÂ
The jealousy (that failed to overpower the miserable rapture, albeit) is eased instantly. If it is not Jayce you are concerned with, then what is it about Shimmer that has engrossed his beloved so?Â
âAs gutted as I am to admit my faults, I am partially responsible for this distribution.âÂ
Through the distorted daze of Viktorâs jubilation, he clings to your every words. You? Y/N? A drug lord? This does not make any senseâŚÂ
âI am not aware how, but someone has grasped possession of my Dusk-Petals. They are only bred at my hand, so I fail to understand where they have retrieved them, but nonetheless, they have obtained them. They have derived the possessive component of my Dusk-Petals and have utilized the essence as the major component in this âShimmerâ. All for the sake of power and profit.â
Not a word is uttered from Viktor as your explanation settles. His darling has been so overcome with guilt and he was so oblivious! He attempts to scavenge the power to adorn you in reassurances, but beneath the weight of your light, he might as well have been a lifeless corpse on the stone pavements of your greenhouse.
âIf I had aâŚâÂ
Your gaze returns to his, expectantly. He nods along dumbly to every word parting from your mouth.
âMessenger, of sort, I may garner the opportunity to halt the expansion of this poison.âÂ
A gasp, equivalent to that of one witnessing a murder, flees from Viktorâs chest. Yes, yes, yes, a million times, yes!Â
âOh, my Y/N, you do not have to ask! Of course I will help you!âÂ
He attempts to scoot closer to you, practically throwing himself into your warm arms. You hinder this effort.Â
âYou⌠Y/N, you could shatter this entire world to nothing but scattered shards and I would crawl over the sharp glass with utter elation! As long as I can deliver whatever demand you send directly into your palms, I will do it all with a smile-!âÂ
He interrupts himself with a coughing fit, rendered breathless from his own blabbering. He scrambles to wipe his hand of the inevitable blood that has spattered from his throat. In this effort, however, he is startled to find no blood at all. Not even a mere drop.Â
His gaze returns to you in all your heavenly form. You return his gaze, almost knowingly. His body cannot resist just melting beneath your attention.
âI love you, sweet angel.â Viktor confesses for the umpteenth time. âI cannot feel anything but my love for you.â
Your expression remains blunt and calm, as it remains stagnantly. Nothing short of utterly bewitching.
âVery well.â
Like the triumph of a curtain call, Viktorâs dreams have come true: to heal and obtain strength. After an entire lifetime, he is finally strong. Here, beneath the light of you, everything sings.Â
Now, his dreams have shifted. Viktor will be your loyal warrior.Â
No matter what it takes.
âş đ§ , 𪡠you are currently listening to . . . ⺠𪺠, đľ ęŞ
â I WILL LOVE YOU TILL I DIE AND
I WILL LOVE YOU ALL THE TIME . . . â
gif creds.
(you are free to imagine Y/N however youâd like to. nonetheless, this and this were my inspiration for what Y/N looks like, in case you were wondering. (nothing adhering to the gender or physicality, just their style and character!)).
tag list: @honey-beeuwu @mrprettycom @makangelo @thelonelyme @solavily @eldritch-bunny @decaffeinatedclodbagelweasel @orbitingmarswithp @frickidyfrog @phantomdomi @mermaidm0tel6 @numbu5 @applepinsss @anon34570 @biohazardousbunny @vogelaqwry @lorely788 @mellowangeltree @myathegoat @alix-37 @lavandercinnamon @vrnicky @mellowfishauthoreggs
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Bundles of Joy, Bundles of Anger
Request: Yes or No
Summary: Upon becoming man-grown, Jace was wed to his mother's cousin, the daughter of Daemon Targaryen. Months later, the war breaks out and surprising news of his child being born reaches him soon after returning to Dragonstone to say his final goodbyes to Luke.
Pronouns: She/Her/Hers
CW/TW: Typical GoT/HOTD warnings, mentions of pregnancy and childbirth, arranged marriage trope, Targcest (Cousins)
so short I do not know why my F!Reader stuff ends up being short
~~~
A million thoughts raced through Jace's head as Vermax descended through the clouds and the ancient castle of Runestone came into view, nestled by the water and essentially isolated by the rural landscape expanding in nearly all directions. His heart raced faster than his mind and his orders for Vermax twisted on his tongue but his dragon nonetheless understood the urgency in his tone and tucked his wings closer toward his body, plunging the both of them toward the ground at a higher speed before expanding them once more and gliding closely over the vibrant grass.Â
It'd only been two days since Jace received the shocking news flown in by raven revealing his lady-wife, Princess (Y/N), had given birth to his child a month prior. The surprise on his face had no doubt been comical when Maester Gerardys awkwardly read the contents of the letter at the meeting and remained standing in silence as Rhaenyra and everyone else took in the startling news.Â
There'd been no word from Runestone, not since (Y/N) had sent a letter detailing an illness to explain her absence from attending alongside them while the claim to Driftmark was disputed. At the time, Jace had shrugged it off and dismissed Baela's insistence that he tend to his wife. They hardly enjoyed each other's company so he saw no use in visiting her and causing her further strife, but now as he watched Runestone grow closer and closer, he kicked himself for not heeding Baela's words.Â
Their presence roused the dragon sleeping near the castle and the shriek from her forced Vermax to slow down. His dragon responded to the call and diverted course toward her, flapping his wings until his speed slowed further. He landed near the she-dragon and lowered himself onto the ground with a quiet chirp. Jace carefully climbed down and landed firmly on his feet, instinctively tugging off his riding gloves and eyeing the bemused she-dragon who seemed half-tempted to burn them both.
"Sagon gÄŤda, Starlight," Jace called, swallowing down the fear that bubbled in him as he began walking toward the path she conveniently rested beside. Starlight huffed a cloud of smoke at him and squinted her emerald eyes at him, her head following him until he reached the gates of Runestone.Â
"Prince Jacaerys," An older man he recognized as Gerold Royce greeted him when the gates opened, bending at the waist. "Our Princess of Runestone has been expecting your arrival, My Prince. She awaits you in the nursery. Come this way, if you please."
The nursery.
Jace nearly stumbled over his feet at those mere words, luckily catching himself before he made a fool of himself before men who eyed him with disdain. He knew of the Royce's dislike for Daemon Targaryen (especially after the supposed murder of Rhea Royce) but he never expected it to extend to his family and himself. Still, he kept his head held eye and one hand on the hilt of his sword as he followed Gerold into the castle.Â
"I was not aware of Princess (Y/N)'s... condition."
Gerold glanced back at him. "We know."Â
A familiar rush of anger spread through him like spilled water. He gritted his teeth and inhaled sharply, his nostrils flaring. "Why was I not informed sooner? I may be young but I am no fool; I know pregnancies may last up to eight or nine moons." He tried restraining his simmering anger. He knew very well how loyal the man was to his blood.Â
"Our Lady desired a peaceful pregnancy, My Prince. She did not wish to be disturbed or bothered during such delicate times." Gerold explained simply and Jace allowed himself a brief scowl before he wiped it off his face once they came upon a guarded door.Â
Stepping inside, Jace's eyes were instantly drawn to the crib in the center of the room and then to his wife seated near it. She looked away from the crib at their presence and sighed quietly, sipping the last of her tea before she set it aside and rose. (Y/N) exhaled deeply, her nose crinkling and her hand pressing near her back to massage the flesh. Jace spared Gerold a glance and walked forward toward her, extending an arm to offer his support but she stopped him and waved him off.Â
"You may leave us, Cousin. Thank you." She told the older man, offering him a brief genuine smile that promptly disappeared when he left.Â
Jace finally noted her appearance up close. She looked exhausted, as was usual of mothers after labor. The bags under her (E/C) eyes were noticeable through her powdered skin and she'd discarded her usual dresses for a simple thing gown that showed her belly still full from the pregnancy. He knew from his time in the Keep that most women differentiated from each other; some, like Dowager Queen Alicent, were able to lose the weight gained during pregnancy fairly quickly whilst others, like his mother, retained it for some time.
A gurgled coo brought his attention down toward the crib and he finally looked upon the baby. "Oh.." He shakily whispered when he noticed the head full of brown hair with silver streaks through it, strands that curled subtly at the ends just as his once did before he got older. Small, frail, and so beautiful. His child. His. He hummed forcibly when tears abruptly sprang to his eyes. "What- What is their name?"
"His name is Valerion."
"A boy?" Jace breathlessly questioned, his head snapping back toward her with widened eyes. "A- A son?" An heir.
He looked back at the little being happily dozing and his heart twisted into itself, cautious steps bringing him closer to the crib. He reached out tentatively and carefully took him into his arms. Valerion stirred in the golden bundle he'd been wrapped into and parted his eyes to peer up at him, blinking sleepily and sighing before his eyes closed again to doze off. Jace chuckled and leaned down, nuzzling his nose against Valerion's forehead.Â
"Your grandmother will be pleased." He whispered and drew back, carefully bouncing his arms as he'd once seen his mother do with Joffery. "A perfect little dragon. You shall be given an egg soon enough. Silverwing has recently laid a clutch and one shall be yours, little one. Once we return to Dragonstone-"
"Valerion and I will remain here in Runestone until further notice." (Y/N) cut in swiftly and his brows knitted together. "Runestone is a safe castle, Jacaerys. If the enemy comes, they will be seen before they can come close and dealt with. I am in no state to travel and neither is he at such a young age. He will see Dragonstone and the Keep after the war."Â
"I cannot stay here, (Y/N). I am needed in Dragonstone to serve alongside my mother, you know this. You will heal in time, and it will be much better if you do so under the care of Maester Gerardys. He will be safe-"
(Y/N) scoffed. "Your mother was nearly slain in her own bedchambers and the Greens are merely a short flight away from the island. I will not risk my child's life, Jacaerys. It is your duty to serve on Dragonstone, it is mine to serve here. Runestone is my castle and my responsibility to protect it, just as it is my responsibility to protect my son." She spoke, tone full-on authoritative and eyes challenging.Â
Jace stared at her in disbelief and grounded himself enough to delicately place Valerion back in his crib before he faced her. "Was this all part of your plan to alienate me as much as possible from my child? We have not spoken since our wedding night nearly a year ago and you remained silent on your pregnancy. I could have been here to see him enter this world. I should have been here- No, you should have been in Dragonstone."Â
"You are a fool if you believe you would have been any help. You would have hovered like a bothersome fly and questioned every single thing as if you had any idea what a pregnancy is like. I remained here in Runestone with my family and I delivered a healthy boy with the help of Maester Corrad and the midwife. This child is Royce as much as he is Targaryen. If you were to pass in battle-"
"Is that what you hope?" Jace bristled as he spat words laced with accusation. "Do you wish for me to pass in battle so that you may rid yourself of this marriage? We made vows, oaths, in the name of the Seven or have you forgotten? We have duties to one another, regardless of our desires, and we are bound to each other. This child is mine as much as he is yours. He needs his father. We do not know how long this war will rage on and I will not allow him to see me as a stranger."Â
(Y/N) released a sigh and lowered herself down onto the cushioned seat, resting her arms over her belly and watching him. "Then, you may visit as you have done today." She said simply and he scoffed again. "You believe because you are Crown Prince that your duties are more important than mine but if I recall only one of us currently rules and it is not you, Jacaerys. I have ruled Runestone since my flowering at the age of eleven whilst you spent your days tormenting Aemond One-Eye, being spoilt and coddled endlessly by your mother, and trailing after the Velaryon girl like a fool."
His face flushed with embarrassment and anger and he took a glance at his son to ease the bubbling emotions threatening to spill over. Jace inhaled deeply and squeezed his eyes, releasing the air and forcing his tense body to relax. He stepped forward and unclasped his sword's holster before bending his knee in front of her. He set the sword aside and reached forward to take her hands into his.
"I understand." He murmured. "I do, I truly do. I understand your concerns and- and I will try to find a compromise that will please us both. I do not wish to fight before our son but I ask of you, as your lord-husband and father of your child, to consider my side of things. I know we have been far from a happy couple and I will admit my feelings for Baela have not left entirely.. but I am willing to change. For you. For him."
#x reader#x you#x y/n#x fem reader#x female reader#house of the dragon#house of the dragon x reader#house of the dragon x female reader#house of the dragon x you#house of the dragon x y/n#hotd#hotd x reader#hotd x you#hotd x y/n#hotd x female reader#jace velaryon#jace velaryon x reader#jace velaryon x you#jace Velaryon x y/n#jace velaryon x female reader
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Imagine youâre Delgal. Imagine you were raised from birth alongside the court jester. You do everything together. You look up to him, being so much older. He seems wise and responsible, and always encouraging you and caring for you, more than your own busy parents are able to. In every sense of the word, he is your brother, despite how different you look and the distance of your station. The people around you tell you that he is an elf, the tone of their voice implying thatâs something scary or even dangerous. But you disagree. Thatâs Thistle, your big brother.
But⌠as you age, things become confusing. You get taller, smarter, stronger, and Thistle is there for you through it all. Only⌠he never seems to change. In your entire journey to adulthood, he hardly seems to have aged a few years, if that. Itâs amusing when you first grow taller than him, then grow facial hair, while Thistleâs short stature and youthful face remains the same. Still, you love him, love his music and his wit and even the bold-faced honesty that gets him in trouble if youâre not around to diffuse the situation. You wonder why such a person has been relegated to the inglorious job of jester, and your father tells you very simply that the magic elves wield is too powerful and dangerous to belong to any other position. But you think thatâs nonsense, youâve trusted Thistle from the day you were born and would do so until the day you die.
It isnât until what shouldâve been the happiest day of your life that you truly start to understand just how different Thistle is from you. Kneeling over your fatherâs cooling corpse, you take in the elfâs panicked face. Heâs so young, so unchanged, and in that moment he seems nearly immortal to you. Youâve heard the stories of elf magic, how their spells could be used to heal wounds and raise the dead, but Thistle canât do any of that. He hasnât been allowed to. Thereâs nothing that either of you can do but watch your father slowly die in front of you.
You never want this to happen again, not when thereâs something that can stop it. You make Thistle the court sorcerer, even as your advisors warn against it. But youâre the king, goddamn it, and you trust him. But more than that, you want what he can give to you. A power greater than any tallman could achieve. You become busier and busier, only checking up occasionally on his studies. Heâs become incredibly proficient in a short amount of time, but your thoughts are elsewhere. Enemies knock on your door, famine chokes the population, and worst of all your beloved son has fallen ill. Itâs just like the day of your wedding, but this time, you have something that can defy that fate. Thistle.
But still, itâs not enough. It seems that even elf magic has its limits, and you canât help but become angry with him. He reacts like a scorned childâ is a scorned child, as youâve come to realizeâ and you apologize. But he tells you he has something secret to show you, something heâs been searching for, researching for these past few years. The idea unsettles you, but youâve become desperate, and you can see that he has, too. So you follow him into the dungeon, watch him smash the statue of your kingdomâs guardian and pull the book from the rubble that would decide your and your peopleâs fate.
Your son is healed, your enemies repelled, and your people fed and taken care of. Youâre happy, and so Thistle is, too. You recognize, vaguely, that despite this achievement the familial bonds between the two of you have never been thinner. But you donât dwell on it. He did what you needed him to do, and now you no longer had to fear the indignity of death or strife.
But of course, things do not remain sweet forever. Thistle has only grown more attached to you, more loyal, and his behavior has become erratic and strange. He keeps you all cooped up in the dungeon, insisting that the outside world is too dangerous. Thereâs a hardness to his still-youthful features that you never saw throughout all those years growing up alongside him. Slowly but surely the person in your memory is replaced by something frightening, almost repulsive, after he strips your own sonâs soul from his body. He seems so unaffected by it all, so⌠inhuman.
Eventually he decides to give you what you said you wanted all those years ago: to no longer fear death. To become immortal. But it is not what you had hoped forâ every day seems to drag into infinity, with joy and mirth seeping rapidly from the unsettled townsfolk as decades, then centuries pass. Thistle has become entirely unapproachable, spending all his time fortifying the dungeon and watching obsessively for any signs of traitors that might challenge the throne. You feel hopeless in it all. No matter how you beg, he never seems to hear you. His power is overwhelming and you fear how he might react to more direct commands. The guilt is intense⌠you know you pushed him into this, pushed him to find a way to achieve everlasting peace at any cost. But this cost is too much. How could he not see that?
1000 years. 1000 years of this torture, and the population of your kingdom has dwindled to almost nothing. In your dreams you see the vision of a golden lion in chains, its wings pinned as it pleads with you to save it. To save your kingdom, to put the remaining souls to rest. You know what needs to be done, itâs told you the best way. You tell the mad mage that you wish to have dinner together with the whole âfamilyââ just like the olden daysâ and the way his face lights up is almost enough to make you reconsider. Almost.
It was a lie, of course. While heâs distracted you take your sonâs empty body, making your way to the surface as fast as your legs can carry you. You know whatâs about to happen. Youâll become nothing but dust, but youâll be free. And with any luck, soon everyone else will be, too. Breaching the surface you get the first rays of sun on your face in a millennium, take your last breaths of fresh air as you tell the story that will free your kingdom.
As you crumble away to nothing, a last thought enters your mind. Perhaps they were all right. Perhaps it was a mistake to trust an elf.
#polly speaks#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#thistle dungeon meshi#Delgal#dungeon meta#thistle posting#anyway. how we doin#I think Delgalâs so interesting as a character bc I kind of hate him but also have no idea how to feel abt him#so. potential character thought study
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Yandere Femboy Tenant x Landlord Reader (2)
Part 1
âThis is your new life, my little landlord, now let me tell you about my rules!â
The sad thing about this situation is the betrayal for you
Youâve heard stories about squatters or terrible tenants that didnât want to leave
But you were never aware you needed to worry about being abducted
And by this tenant no less
From your many other tenants who were bodybuilders, gang members, drug dealers
It was this one
The pretty femboy who was always late on rent
âWhatâs with that indignant look on your face? Mad you didnât guess? Thatâs okay no one suspects just how much talent is behind my gorgeous face.â
You donât know if youâd call a dedicated fanbase excuse me a cult a talent
Now in some foreign luxurious place, the only people surrounding you are Sora and the dedicated followers who have been commanded to keep you here
âSora-sama is bestowing a gift upon you! Be grateful!â
âSora-sama did say you would say these concerning thingsâŚbut he was right your illness is severe.â
âNo worries Sora-sama has taught us how to give your medication no worries! Now stand still!â
The medication youâre given ranges from alcohol, paralyzing serums, or aphrodisiacs depending on your behavior
Sora is very careful about where heâs affectionate with youÂ
He knows very well which of his loyal little followers will not mind, the ones that may even begin to worship youÂ
But he knows there are dangerous onesÂ
Jealous ones that are perfect for when he demands they commit certain crimes or ultimately sacrificesâwhen he gets to that point
It takes a while to go that deep
But a near attack from a jealous follower is enough to trigger it
Before this, heâd vaguely recall how he first cried to his followers about an especially creepy fan and hearing from police how little of their remains could identifiedÂ
Or how one of the fans got a little too forward making him actively cringe in front of his followers
That fan was never heard of or seen again
At the time his guilt was small but present
He didnât kill those peopleâŚhis fans didâŚbesides they were the ones overstepping
Itâs not that badâŚright
But when youâre on the line that guilt dissipates
The tears he sheds when he caresses the bandage on your arm
Are ones of anger
Heâs perfect, beautiful, kind, full of wisdom
So why was his love being tampered withÂ
The world should and would be at his feet
With youâsafelyâat his side
But he canât do this without you being in danger
So heâll let his tears show to the most loyal, the most violent, the most dutiful
âThey hurt me by hurting my (Y/n)! Do you like this?â
âNO!âÂ
âWill you not protect me? Protect us?â
âOf course! âWill you kill for us?â
âYES!â
âGood. Weâll be waiting to see the results of your hunt. My beautiful little followers!â
âYES!â
It kind of takes him back when you do try to add some input
Not too long ago he remembers pleading with you about rent
Now itâs you pleading with him not to execute the unlucky group that tried to take your place
But just like you did with him heâs going to cruelly deny youÂ
Well maybe he can be persuaded if you let him participate in an activity youâve forbidden of him
âI might be willing to let them off with a loss of one limb if you let me do that one thing!â
â....â
âCome on! Arenât you a benevolent compassionate partner to their king? Wonât you convince me not to punish them with my wrath?â
âOkay but only one time!â
âYay! Wait for me to get my lingerie!â
He flips often between being at your whim to controlling every aspect of your life
But he has you for an example
Back then you were the landlord who caught his heart and kept him in line
So isnât it just perfect that he do the same
#yandere x reader#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yandere x you#yanderexrea#yandere#yanderes#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc#yandere x darling#yandere male x reader#yandere femboy#yandere femboy tenant#yandere tenznt x landlord reader#yandere original character#yandere original characters#yandere femboy oc#yandere x gn reader#yandere x gender neutral reader
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Nobody Else (final: part 2)
pairing: chaebol!wonwoo x chaebol!fem.reader
genre: enemies with benefits to lovers, smut (minors do not interact please), arranged marriage, a lot of angst, and some fluff.
summary: the girl who was proud about making her own destiny, the boy she swore to never interact with. sometimes it takes a lifetime to know someone, even yourself. because who would've seen any of this coming?
chapter word count: 22.8k
warnings: angst warnings: overthinking, anxiety, a lot of it. spiralling, constant worries, mention of insomnia. mention of illnesses and a lung tumour, hospitals, medical treatments, relapse. discussions about death. please do not read if you find these triggering! a lot of arguing and usage of profanities. mention of smoking, drinking, food.
smut warnings: oral sex (m. receiving, f. receiving), usage of sex toys, unprotected sex, overstimulation, dom-sub dynamics, breast play, spanking, use of spit during sex, usage of petnames (darling, babe, sweetheart, princess, baby for female), degradation, usage of sir (for male), sir kink, marriage kink, breeding kink, office sex, elevator sex, sex in a public place.
a/n: OH MY GOD. so many people were waiting for this, i can't even imagine. i've had some really tough months when i could not find time to write at all, so i am very sorry for the delay. well, here you go! i hope it meets your satisfactions! putting the taglist in a reblog because the fanfic itself is massive. please let me know your thoughts!! reblogs, comments and asks are so appreciated <3 thank you for reading!
part 1
You bite your nails nervously. You do this often, itâs a habit you mask well through regular manicures at your home. No one knows about it. No one needs to know.Â
Youâve tried it all in these last two days, you swear. Youâve tried every trick on the web- listing the pros and cons of your thoughts on a sheet of paper (on your phoneâs notes app), venting to someone (yourself in the mirror), meditation, drinking wine and unwinding in a bathtub, listening to white noise to help you sleep.Â
It doesnât help. Nothing does. Nothing helps to erase the thoughts from your mind, nothing helps to stop the cogs and wheels of the gears turning in your head, nothing helps to drown out the noise of your overthinking. Youâve worried yourself to a fever, and itâs on the fourth day that Jisung caves in and asks you, âMaâam, are you doing okay?â
You can trust him, you know that. He had, after all, not outed your antics to your mother in spite of her attempts at bribing him with a higher salary. He had remained loyal to you, as he had himself confirmed when youâd brought up the issue with him the day after the fateful lunch invitation.Â
But he feels too close, too personal, and yet too distant. He would understand, and yet nothing at all. It feels like a gamble.
âYes, why wouldnât I be?â You smile, while popping another paracetamol. At least the fever and its meds help you sleep.Â
âYou donât look like yourself. I donât know if I am in a position to say this, but⌠is this about the thing your mother discussed with you Maâam?â
âAre you reading my mind, Jisung-ah? Is that your secret to being the best secretary in the world?â You chuckle drily, staring outside the glass window that makes up a wall in your office. Itâs a rainy day, not the stormy kind, but the pestering kind. Where it drizzles light enough that people donât want to carry umbrellas, but the rain is so insistent, it drenches you right through anyway.Â
âI donât know how appropriate it is for me to ask anything regarding this Maâam. But I genuinely am curious about how Mr Y/L/N and Mr Jeon agreed to it in the first place.â
On the day youâd spoken to him about the entire affair, youâd told him the truth about your relationship with Wonwoo. His loyalty had earned him at least this much truth, and you were glad to have a confidant. You tried to play it off as coolly as you could, but as soon as youâd spilled the truth, youâd realise what a big weight had been relieved off your chest. It felt like being a teenager again. You had explained to Jisung that it was not romantic in the least, and in fact, you wanted to draw an end to it. You didnât care to tell him that it was because you were addicted like a drug.Â
That was the problem. These last three days wouldnât have become such a burden for you had you simply called Wonwoo and sought his help. Like a magician, heâd silence the thoughts in your mind and leave you with more clarity than ever, almost like a fresh slate beginning anew. You knew he was the perfect solution, but you had decided to cut it off. There was no point in persisting in this kind of a relationship where you werenât even friends, not even on talking terms, and yet you needed him to stabilise you. All while he didnât need you at all. For him, you were just another of his regulars. Heâs probably already replaced you by now.Â
âMy mother can be⌠very capable when she wants. She has her ways.â
âIâm sure she does. It must not have been an easy feat to swallow pride to agree to the idea of the wedding and take the Jeons out for lunch.â
Words get stuck in your throat. Pride. Youâve never let go of it. Life has been humbling, but youâve never stopped being proud of who you are and what youâve been able to achieve. All the dreams youâve fulfilled. It forms an integral part of who youâve become, your identity, and the way you perceive yourself. Youâve tried to not let it become arrogance nor vanity, although you have had sufficient reasons. That discipline is also something you pride yourself on.Â
âBut I guess itâs not a big price for happiness,â Jisung completes his little philosophical speech and busies himself with arranging out letters on your desk that need to be signed, arranged in order of urgency. âIâll be at my desk Maâam, should you need any help.â He bows and leaves the room, and youâre still staring out of the window.Â
Happiness.Â
What an odd word. What an odd sensation for the billions of people across the world to be chasing all their lives. You had always considered yourself to be above that rat race for gratification and validation. Your successes spoke for itself, and you had no reason to consider yourself unhappy when you were living the dream youâd envisioned since you were a child.Â
But are you happy?
_
Itâs just for an enjoyable late night drive, you reason with yourself when you find yourself driving on the road that takes you from your office to Wonwooâs office building. Itâs just to see if their coffee has improved, you think, when you step into the building and walk inside. Itâs just to see if their employees are forced to work overtime, you figure, when youâre granted a visitor pass by the reception desk even though theyâre shocked to see you here.Â
âWhat are you doing here?â
Wonwoo stares at you from the end of the corridor. Itâs not lit very brightly and totally empty.Â
âAre you busy?â
Wonwooâs tongue goes into his left cheek, you see it through his skin. Heâs wearing a suit in baby blue. You knew heâd look good in blue.Â
âYes. Iâm working late as you can see. I donât enjoy it particularly, so I donât do it unless Iâm really behind on work.â
And whyâs that so? Trying to catch up with our closing figures for the financial year? A snarky comment is on the tip of your tongue, but you donât want to say it. The jibe feels tasteless, even for you.Â
No, tonight youâre here in desperation, you finally admit to yourself. Youâre here because like any other addict, itâs hard to let go once you get used to the high of happiness you ride when the dopamine kicks in.
âSorry. Iâll leave.â His rejection is clear. He knows what youâre here for, thatâs for sure. Youâd never go out of your way to come to his office if it had been for anything else. Itâs a good reminder call of reality.Â
This is the boy your parents want you to marry. This is the boy you rejected from marrying and from sleeping with. He has every right to turn you down now.
Wonwoo takes a step forward, you take a step backward. Itâs a dance. You pause, you donât even know when you were on the verge of tears. You bite your lips and turn away your face. You walk away quickly, as silently as you arrived. Your thoughts are loud enough to mask the sound of Wonwoo jogging after you, and you only realise when he grabs your arm as soon as you enter the elevator. He enters too, naturally, face a bit flushed from the chase, but before you can ask him whatâs up, he pushes you against the mirror on the back of the elevator and kisses you hard.Â
It knocks your breath away. In the best way possible.Â
You kiss him back. Wildly, passionately. Like lovers, you would think in retrospection, not like rivals who fuck. As if youâd missed each other. Another second of overthinking and youâd delude yourself into believing that he needs you as much as you do. But thankfully, he kisses well enough to wash your thoughts away.Â
âDonât run away from me like that, girl.â He snarls near your ear, his breath making you ticklish, and you whimper when he begins to kiss your neck. Heâs going to leave marks again, and frankly, you canât find it in yourself to reprimand him. Not when your brain is finally drifting away from the anxiety.Â
The elevator dings just as he puts his lips back on yours, tongue forcing itself in. You break apart, gasping for air. You havenât even noticed what a mess youâve made of his hair. âWonwoo I⌠I can leave, really. If youâre busy.â âNo, stay.â He doesnât step away from you even when the elevator door opens, holding you down with his hands, keeping you close to him. The elevator door closes again, and he frantically presses the floor number of his office. âCome with me while I pack up,â he says as an explanation, and you understand. Then he unbuttons your shirt and begins to suck bruises all over the exposed flesh over your collarbones and chest, hands fondling with your breasts. Even over the bra, he instantly finds your nipples and rubs them to perfect hardness, making them so sensitive, that when he lifts you up into his arms and wraps your legs around his waist, your nipples brush against his face and he can feel the nubs poking out.Â
âYou get turned on like youâre a touch-starved bitch,â he says roughly, making you thrash your arms against his back for the rudeness, before chuckling and thrusting his mouth onto the clothed nipples to suck them while he walks out of the elevator, holding you in his arms still, and seemingly facing no difficulty in walking at all. You become silent again, as you ponder on how strong he really must be, and his bites at your nipples do nothing to prevent the manhandling kink from showing itself.Â
âTake me on your desk, Wonwoo.â You beg as he enters his office, but he laughs and puts you down on his chair. Thankfully the entire floor is empty. He begins to arrange papers and turn off his desktop, while you sit silently at his desk. The high slowly wears out as his clearing up takes longer and longer, until youâre no longer turned on anymore and reality strikes.Â
He looks at you once all the work is done, staring deep at your soul, making you feel naked. Consciously, you start to button up your shirt and fix your collar.
âI thought we were done with this, Y/N.â
He says it like youâd dumped him while dating, and itâs funny. But you canât laugh. You did cut him off and now youâre begging him to take you back. Itâs a little absurd- inconsistency has never been one of your weaknesses. Youâre tempted to dissect it in your brain and understand why itâs happening, but you fall into a spiral of overthinking again.
Itâs getting tough to breathe.
You stand up and walk around the room. Itâs spacious, with a simple layout, nothing modern like your own office space. You canât blame it, it definitely screams Wonwoo to you. Instead of huge windows on the walls, he has mahogany shelves stacked with books. Instead of a statement chandelier, he has minimalist lights in focal points of the room. Instead of a charcoal grey settee with everything in cool shades of steel, his office is done in off-white, decorated with rich tones of wood. The room tells you so much about Wonwoo, although you probably know it all already- legacy, tradition and diligence. This is what heâs made of, old money that takes no risks and succeeds without gambles.Â
âYou know why I had to come back.â
âThat doesnât change anything.â He walks up to you, standing in front of you, as you gaze at the books on his shelves. âY/N, look at me.â And you do. He looks like Adonis and you want to kiss him. âYou said it was getting toxic for you.â He snaps you back to attention, and you sigh. âI canât⌠Wonwoo, I tried. But IâŚâ you walk away, unable to continue. Continuing would mean telling him whatâs driving you to the brink of anxiety every moment of the day.
âWe can talk. If this is about that day, weâre in this together. We may not be friends, but we can be allies in this.âÂ
The simple way in which he says these words, you donât think he realises how much more vulnerable he makes you feel. How much more tempted to spill it all to him and be relieved of the burden of this worry.Â
âI donât want to talk to you, Wonwoo. I didnât come here for talking.â You walk back towards him. âFuck me and make my brain stop thinking, please.â He closes his eyes for a second. The tension is palpable, itâs making your palms sweat. You tilt your head and gently lean in to kiss the edge of his jaw. His stubble grazes against your softer lips and itâs a nice feeling.Â
âI canât say no when you ask like this.â
_
You wake up in the middle of the night, clammy with sweat and naked under the sheets, alone in Wonwooâs king-sized bed. Your wrists hurt from being tied with his tie for too long, and youâre definitely too sore to move, but the pleasant buzz all over your body is too good a sensation to forgo. But now that youâve woken up, you feel thirsty and hot all over, so you get out of bed. You notice your underwear neatly kept on the couch, Wonwoo had taken care to not rip them. You quickly wear them before looking for any waterbottle in the room. Seeing none, and not seeing Wonwoo either, you open the bedroom door and slowly tiptoe your way outside. Once past the small corridor, you notice thereâs a dim light in the kitchen, and you can see Wonwooâs shadow from far away. As you step closer, you notice heâs wearing formals, complete with a glazing white shirt and a grey tie, and his hair is brushed back neatly, although his pants are still pyjamas. Heâs doing something on his laptop. You wait in the shadows for a few minutes, trying to understand if heâs in a video meeting or something, but you only hear frantic typing noises from the kitchen. After a whole five minutes pass, you step into the kitchen, and Wonwoo looks up at the same time.Â
âOh! You scared me.â
âAre you in a meeting?â
âNo, it got over a while back. Why are you up?â
âI could ask you the same thing.â
âThe meeting was with a firm in Canada. They couldnât adjust timings.â
âAnd you couldnât get someone else to do it for you?â You huff, annoyed at how unbothered he is about waking up this ungodly hour and sitting for meetings. You once again thank Jisung for scheduling foreign meetings at suitable timings.
âDo you get someone else to attend your important meetings for you?âÂ
You both stay in silence for a minute, Wonwoo sitting on his kitchen stool, and you standing awkwardly near the door, staring at each other. Itâs only when you start shivering in the cold that you realise what you actually came here for.
âYouâre working hard. Too hard. Donât try to compete with me, Jeon.â You lean down on the island next to him, close enough to hear his breathing but not touching him at all.Â
âGo to bed, Y/N.â
âI was thirsty. Where do you keep water in your house?âÂ
He gets up from his stool and brings a bottle. âDrink, and go to sleep. Or go home.â
You silently sip the cool water, without replying. You can see the dawn slowly coming up from the window in the kitchen, lighting the room up. The circles under Wonwooâs eyes become prominent to you, and for no reason at all, your heart aches. This is what itâs going to be like, marrying you, Jeon Wonwoo, you think, as you look at him with a careful glance. Heâs focusing on his laptop again, typing at light speed, his glasses perched on the edge of his nose. Youâre sipping water from his bottle, in his kitchen, wearing nothing but your underwear, and watching the sunrise. Is this what those nights filled with deadlines and insomnia are going to look like if you get married? Is this what staying up together will look like? Is this what watching the dawn together will be like? The sensation tingles your nerves and makes you anxious again.Â
âY/N, if you want to say something, just say it. Or go to sleep, trust me. Youâll need to wake up fresh tomorrow morning.â
The kitchen is warm, cosy, and filled with the familiar scent of Wonwooâs body. You want to stay wrapped in it, and not say a word. You donât want to break this moment, although you have no idea why sharing this simple moment is making you so emotional. Perhaps because youâve never done it before and never imagined you would do it?
âMy father is dying, Wonwoo.âÂ
Wonwoo stops typing and looks up.
âHe has a tumour in his lungs.â
âSince when?â
âA few months now. He hadnât told me. He didnât want to bother me, my mom said.â
Thereâs a beat of silence. Again the warmth of the kitchen wraps you up and you both stare out at the slowly brightening sky outside. As a girl, youâd hate watching the sunrise. It would remind you of the nights youâd been unable to sleep and had been forced to stay up all night. But now, you can appreciate its beauty. Its consistency, its reliability. It happens every day. One of the precious few things that happen regularly, youâve come to realise.Â
Wonwoo breaks the silence. âSo why now?â
âHuh?â
âWhy tell you now, of all times?â
âHe wants to see me married before he dies.â
Wonwoo shuts down the lid of his laptop with a smash, knowing fully whatâs coming next.
âY/N. What do you want?â He stands up and comes to stand next to you, leaning against the counter and looking down at you.
There are many things you want to say. I donât want to throw away my freedom. I donât want to marry a stranger. I donât want to dance to my Appaâs whims. I donât want to lose focus on my career. I donât want to marry you. âI donât want to disappoint him, Wonwoo.â Itâs the ultimate truth. Itâs what has fueled you for years- the desire to become that child for your parents who would take care of them when they need you, to love silently and support unconditionally, to give back everything theyâd given to you.Â
âI donât want to lose him.â
âIs this what you were so worried about?â You look up at him, and he tilts your face upwards with his hand on your chin. You want to lean into the warmth of his palm. âYes. I donât⌠I ⌠I donât know what to do. I feel so helpless.â
âWhat about treatment?â
âStage 4, practically impossible, thatâs what the reports say. My mom showed them to me. She cried so much, and I⌠I couldnât do anything. I canât do anything.â You move away from him, turning your body to the other side. He lets you move away.
âTreatment abroad? In the US?â
âYes, thatâs⌠thatâs what Iâve been trying to figure out. Iâve spoken to a few people, but Appa is adamant. He refuses to talk to me about this every time Iâve raised it, these last few days.â
He sighs. Your heart aches again. You donât even notice when tears begin rolling down your cheeks. Youâve never felt more alone than this, more helpless, more pitiful. What worth were your dreams and successes if life successfully left you unshielded in one stroke?
âLetâs get married. Youâll have more bargaining power to talk to him then.â
He makes it sound so simple. Youâve thought of this a hundred times before, and you still canât register that he just said that. You turn around slowly, looking up at him through your wet eyelashes. âDonât joke with me.â
âIâm not.â
âBut I donât want to marry you.â
âEven if it gets your Appa into a good treatment abroad?â
You stomp your foot, and hurt your bare toes on the cold tile. âWhy is my Appa so stubborn?â
âJust like you, isnât he?â
You glare at Wonwoo, but heâs deadly serious. Thereâs not a hint of a joke on his face, and he genuinely seems to be invested in this idea. âYouâre serious.â âI am. I wouldnât offer marriage to you casually.â You bite your lip, your heart rate begins to slow down. Wave after wave of calm washes over you, suddenly you can breathe well again. âYouâre serious,â you say again, not believing it still. âI am. Do you want me to go down on my knees?â âWonwoo, youâre not thinking about this. Donât turn your back on me when you regret it later. This isnât a light thing, itâs a marriage, for fuckâs sake!â âIs your Appaâs life more precious than your ego?â âIf it werenât, I wouldnât have come begging to you, would I?â âThen you know why Iâm agreeing to this.â âWonwoo, donât take this on your conscience. Iâll forgive you if you step back right now.â âI wonât forgive myself.â He bends down to your eye level, and takes your chin in his hand again. âIt isnât going to be that bad, is it?â
You let out such a big sigh of relief that youâre sure the air tickles Wonwooâs palm holding on to your chin.Â
_
You donât fall asleep that night, or rather morning. Wonwoo makes tea, and you sit on the living room couch, an armâs distance away from each other, chalking out a plan to convince your Appa to go abroad for treatment.
âWhen did your mother come and tell you all this?â
âThe day after the lunch. She called me over.â
Youâre our breadwinner now, Y/N. Your father didnât want to tell you because he doesnât want to bother you anymore. Your motherâs words echo in your mind. Is this what youâd come down to? Were you that male who couldnât be bothered with any problems of the household just because you earned an income? Had you become those slimy men youâd hated all your life? Just because you had taken over the company didnât mean you had stopped being their daughter, for godâs sake.Â
âHe wants to die in Korea, he says.â
âThat doesnât mean we let him die without treatment.â
We. Wonwoo has started using it so freely, as if heâs truly considering you an ally like he had said before.Â
âWhat are you going to get out of this?â You perch yourself on the kitchen counter, your bare legs dangling next to where Wonwoo sits on his stool. Youâre chewing on the granola bar you found in the fridge because youâre suddenly hungry.
Wonwoo looks at you for a second, pensive and thoughtful in the pause before replying. âWe donât have to do forever and always. We can divorce after the treatment is done.âÂ
âYou didnât answer my question.â
âI have my reasons.â
The sunrise is beautiful, another day has begun. Although one tornado in your heart has calmed down, it doesnât mean youâre completely at peace though. Youâre still burning with worry, there are a thousand questions floating in your head. You donât know the answers to most of them, and youâre scared just like you had been when you had stepped into the adult world on your own footing, for the first time. But unconsciously, youâve come to realise that youâre not alone this time.
You have Jeon Wonwoo with you.
_
You drive directly to your sisterâs house to tell her about your decision. You realise that she has no idea that your mother has spilled the news about your fatherâs health to you, when you tell her that youâre only agreeing to this marriage on one condition. She tries to deny it at first, but then she realises itâs a useless task against your obstinacy.Â
âIf you could admit now that you were dating Wonwoo, why didnât you admit it that day?â she says finally, resignedly.Â
âSo that you could hide Appaâs illness from me forever?
âItâs nothing like that.â
âFirstly, tell me why youâd been stalking me for so long.â
âNot for so long. Ever since Appa found out, he became obsessed with settling you down. Itâs become his last wish, you know, that kind of thing. His last project. His last duty. His last task to complete before he⌠you know. It was just a happy coincidence that as soon as we prodded your chauffeur he spilled that you and Wonwoo had been spending an awful lot of time together.â
You scoff.Â
âYeah, well, Wonwoo and I needed to talk over things. Commitment and stuff. Anyway, now weâll give Appa what he wants. Promise me you wonât object to anything I say. Promise me you and Mom will back me up when I take him to the US for treatment.â
Her eyes soften down, tears brimming on the edge.
âHe always loved you more, you know? Probably because youâre exactly like him.â âUnnieâŚâ âNo! Iâm not jealous or anything. Itâs natural to have a favourite child. Heâs only human, after all. He found his ideal child in you- responsible and independent. He really sees himself in you, thatâs why.âÂ
You hug your sister from the side, as you sit down on the couch. Her belly is quite bulging now, stretched against the fabric of the loose lycra dress.
âIf anyone can convince him, itâs you, Y/N-ah. Our maknae. The apple of his eye.â She smiles. Thereâs something so broken in her eyes, and you hate it. Your Unnie, who youâve never seen sad. You wonder how much sheâs had to hide from you to keep this news a secret. You wonder how long theyâd planned to keep it a secret, anyway.Â
âDo you trust me, Unnie?â
She kisses your forehead, and smiles again, âYes of course. Whereâs this coming from?â
âItâs just⌠nothing. I just want to know Iâm not alone.â
âYou never were, sweetheart.â
_
After that, everything becomes a whirlwind. You barely have time to process things, how fast they happen. Wonwoo informs his parents, thereâs another meal shared by the two families. You both still donât tell anyone the truth about your relationship, and frankly, thereâs no need to explain, when both families are so happy with the wedding. Especially your father. His eyes shine, and you stick by his side all evening.Â
âMy little girlâs all grown up now.â He says to you later. You almost cry at the fondness of his words, affection he rarely shows. Thereâs no more words spoken. Thereâs no need for words. You tuck him into bed, and pat him to sleep. You donât want to leave his side at all.
_
You donât cross paths with Wonwoo for the week running up to the wedding. Thereâs a clear division of work- heâs handling the internal logistics, and youâre running the external front. This is nothing but a business project for the two of you. Youâve pushed the worries about the marriage to the back burner, your priority being your father right now. Youâve already booked a treatment plan for him in the US, booked his flight tickets, and sorted everything out. Of course, you havenât approached the topic with him yet, but you drop hints every day.Â
Youâve decided to live with your parents until the wedding. You find it harder to stay away from them these days. Somehow, everything reminds you of them, and youâre brought to tears in the middle of a work meeting one day, when you remember how your father had brought you to the first stakeholder meeting when you were 16 years old, to introduce you to the world of business. You donât want to leave life upto fate anymore. At least not the bits you can help.Â
Part of managing the external front is speaking to the media. Thereâs countless questions at your latest press conference. Although the conference is to launch a new product, the journalists seem to be more interested in hearing the truth about the rumours currently floating around. Youâd expected this, thatâs why youâd timed the release of the rumours and the launch of the product at the same time. The public opinion needs to be in favour of your marriage, otherwise the alliance would hurt you both.Â
âY/L/N Y/N-ssi, is it true that youâre soon getting married to Jeon Wonwoo-ssi of Jeon Estates?âÂ
You blush, again a carefully practised move. Youâve spent many a minute in front of a youtube screen last night, trying to perfect the fake blush.
âAre we really going to discuss personal matters at an official conference like this?â Another measured smile, followed by a general laugh rippling across the audience for the sake of being polite. âBut yes, itâs true. I wonât try to hide it anymore.â
At that very moment, a thousand questions pop up from all corners. âAnymore? Y/L/N Y/N-ssi, does that mean that youâve been together for a long time now?â âCan we expect a merger of Jeon Estates with your company, then?â âIs the marriage a business decision or an affair of love?â
Youâre another fake smile away from throwing up right now. Their curiosity gets on your nerves, you know that no matter what you say, theyâre going to interpret what they really want to. Thankfully Jisung, who is moderating, carefully steps in and stops the journalists from asking any more questions. âWeâll not be taking any more personal questions. With that we come to the end of the conference. If you have any more questions, please write to us and we shall answer them over mail. Thank you for attending today.â
You exit the conference hall quickly, eyes hurting from the flashlights. Itâs going to only get worse, you think. Time to brace for impact.
_
Itâs only the night before the wedding that you get the jitters. Youâre sitting on the floor of the balcony, looking at the roads of the Seoul night view, stress-eating cotton candy. You canât believe that this is happening. Would you ever be able to have guessed this is how youâd be getting married? Not that you had ever harboured any ambitions about love or marriage. Youâd been happy to see your parents share a loving marriage, and your sister as well. But since a young age, youâd decided that marriage was not for you. Sex? That was necessary. Dating? Perhaps, but casual. Love? Your first relationship in college had convinced you it was not your forte- youâd fallen out of feelings after a few months, and you had never tried to fall in love again. Marriage? Not even on the cards right now. Kids? Probably never. You didnât think youâd live that long.Â
And yet, your wedding invite was sitting idle on your lap. Printed on beautiful handmade paper, intrinsically engraved with orchid petals, and the fonts printed out in a loopy serif font, it was really pretty. Posh and classy, like everybody expected. It had been sent out to a few people only, Wonwoo had asked for a small wedding, and you had happily agreed. Having to deceive your parents and sister was bad enough. Lesser the better.Â
The doorbell rings. Youâre taken by surprise, not expecting anyone at this hour. Probably Jisung, perhaps heâs come to drop something off. That boyâs working too hard as well, you need to give him a raise after this entire affair is finished.Â
But itâs Wonwoo.Â
âAre you busy?â He asks before even entering.Â
âNo?â
âCan I come in?â
He looks over your figure, the long t-shirt youâre wearing with the shorts that are hidden under the t-shirt. Youâre getting more confused by the moment. You open the door wider, and he steps in.Â
âWhatâs going on?â
âThere are details we need to talk about.â
You take a deep breath, leaning against the wall. Since that conversation at dawn with Wonwoo, you had started guarding yourself against him. Something had changed in your mind- youâd feel more vulnerable next to him, more bared, more naked. Even if he didnât look at you, youâd feel like you could read your mind all the time.Â
âLike what?â
âI made a contract. Itâs a⌠guidebook of sorts.â He sits at the sofa, taking out his phone and placing it on your coffee table. Heâs wearing his work clothes, so youâre guessing heâs come directly from work. âWhatâs it about?â You sit next to him, and he pushes your phone towards you. âDo you have a printer? We could print it out. Or you can-â âIâll get a print. Do you want something?â He leans back on the sofa, but his posture is still stiff. Youâve not seen him like this. Itâs almost like heâs nervous. âNo. I need to leave quickly, so itâs best if you can go through this quickly. I donât have time to waste.â You roll your eyes and stand up, keeping your knee perched on the sofa, terribly close to where his hand is. âWhatâs this attitude? Weâre getting married tomorrow, and this is how youâre going to be?â âWell, what did you expect? Just because I agreed to marry and help you out, doesnât mean Iâm going to suddenly be in love with you.â âHelp me out? I didnât fucking need your help, Wonwoo!â âReally? Your desperation told me something else that night.â Heâs standing up now too, and it feels like heâs towering over you on purpose to make you feel small. You take a step back, he doesnât move forward. Itâs not push and pull, itâs gravity unwinding.Â
âListen, we can still call this off. I donât want to be an object of your pity.â
âPity? I wanted to help you, Y/N. Thereâs a difference, or is your brain too ego-clouded to understand?â
âWonwoo, I could marry anyone-â
âAnd yet, it was me you came to!â
âIt was convenient! I couldnât really marry ⌠say, Jisung, when my parents had proof that weâd been sleeping together!â
âOh, so itâs Jisung now-â
âIt was a damn example!â Youâre shouting now, but his voice is still low and hoarse. It creates goosebumps on your skin.Â
âIf thatâs who you want to marry, you can go ahead. You better know that I have no desire to be wedded to you tomorrow!â He takes a step forward, and you step back. âWhat do you think I am, huh? Your toy? Today you want to fuck, tomorrow you want to end things, the next day you come begging at my door to blow your mind with my dick, and the day after that you want to get fucking married? You donât think keeping up with your plot twists are stressful for me? Do you think Iâm getting off on your mood swings? I am helping you, because youâre in a dire situation. Donât you dare spin this narrative to anything else, because it is not charity or love for you thatâs motivating me to step into this hell of a marriage that I can see coming.âÂ
With every word he utters, he steps closer and closer, and you keep walking back until your back hits the wall. And then heâs standing right in front of you, close enough that you can see the exact dilation of his pupils even beyond his glasses. âI donât need your help, Wonwoo. Iâm not a damsel in distress.â He closes his eyes for a second, breathing in. When his eyes do open again, theyâre different- darker, yet with more clarity, less angry and yet more dangerous. He leans down, and for a second, for a delusional mindless moment, you think heâs going to kiss you. You part your lips, waiting for impact, as he tilts his head ever so slightly, all while staring into your soul.
âI donât give a fuck about you, Y/N. I donât care. Iâm just repaying an old debt.â
Then he steps back and picks up his phone from the coffee table. âIâll mail it to you. Donât be a brat and make sure to read it.â
Youâre still stuck against the wall like an insect, too stunned to move. Before he walks out of the door, he says without looking at you, âSee you tomorrow, sweetheart.âÂ
_
The wedding dress is simple, nothing in frills. You see it for the first time when you wear it on the morning of your wedding. As you sit in your dressing room, revising your vows, your sister enters. Sheâs all but jumping in excitement. âDarling, why so serious?â She grabs your hands and smiles widely at you. âTodayâs your big day! Donât think about Appaâs sickness today, or work stuff, or anything at all. Your wedding day isnât going to come back, so you make sure to make the most of it!â You wish you could laugh at her face, her words seeming ridiculous to you. You wish she wasnât so excited, it would only save her the disappointment sheâd have to face later.Â
So you force a smile. âIs it time? Iâm just nervous. What if I forget my vows?â âThen you forget them. You love Wonwoo, Y/N-ie. You can just declare your love freely. You donât need to stick to a script. Go ahead and curse him if you like!â You do laugh at this, and she joins you too. âThere! Thatâs my girl. Honestly, discovering that you and Wonwoo⌠together⌠it was a shock for us. Like, weâd never thought of you both ever liking each other. But then, it made sense. Especially what he had said that night, I remember. Thatâs the moment I knew, something was definitely upâ You gawk, âWhat night?â She giggles, âThat night at the party. You know? Donât act dumb, cutie.â She wriggles her eyebrows and it dawns on you what exactly she was referring to. Fuck. Of course she had heard, fuck Wonwoo for being so damn loud.Â
You got out of your head, when someone called you to the hall, telling you that itâs time. You slowly make your way out of your dressing room, making sure your dress doesnât get spoiled. Your father waits outside the room, dressed elegantly.Â
âAre you ready?â
Thereâs an odd peace in his eyes, as he smiles at you with pride.Â
Fuck it. Thank god youâre getting married early. Otherwise whoâd walk you down the aisle⌠if you got too late?
âYes, Appa.â You smile back, and loop your arm through his outstretched arm.Â
_
The gates of the hall open up, revealing a beautifully decorated banquet, with an announcer standing in the centre, to conduct the ceremony. All the guests turn to look at you, dressed to their nines. But youâve got eyes on only one person in the room.Â
For the first time in your life, you think Wonwoo looks beautiful. Attraction based on looks was barely something you experienced with him, but today you realise why people fell for him like dominos. He looks absolutely regal in his tuxedo- simple, yet thatâs what suits him perfectly. You think, youâve never seen Wonwoo wear anything excessive, always minimalistic, and really he looks best like that. Because he doesnât need any accessories, his face does enough.Â
âGo, sweetheart,â your father leaves you midway the walkway, and you realise you have to walk the rest of the way on your own. You bow a little to Appa, and then look up front again. Your eyes meet Wonwooâs and your heart races. He looks too pretty to be real, and yet you find yourself walking towards him. The entire audience erupts into applause when Wonwoo takes a few steps forward and extends his hand. You take it, and he accompanies you to your place, dropping your hand only after a slight peck pressed on the back of your hand. The crowd erupts in cheers again, and for the first time in your life, you blush genuinely.Â
You stand facing the announcer, not daring to look at the man next to you. You have enough time to look at him anyway.Â
_
The rest of the wedding ceremony went off peacefully. After reciting your vows perfectly, hand in Wonwooâs hand, avoiding his eye contact desperately, and exchanging the rings, the announcer asked you to kiss. Well, that was easy. He didnât use tongue, thankfully, otherwise you wouldâve moaned in public. Even the drinks and dinner arrangement afterwards was easy. Smiling and small talk came like free flow to you after so many years.Â
The hard part comes later, when you both sit in your designated limousine, exhausted after the long ceremonies of the day. Your feet hurt in the heels, and using the washroom had been a pain in the dress, so youâd desperately held on to your bladder. Youâre counting down the minutes to going home, and all you want is peace.
But Wonwoo, like so many other things, is not on the same page as you.Â
âWhere are we going?â You ask, noticing that the carâs heading in the opposite direction as your house.
âTo my house.â
âWait, what?â
He looks up from his phone. âDidnât you read the guide?âÂ
âWonwoo, Iâm not jobless, you know.â
âI fucking knew it. Right, youâre too busy being a brat.â He mutters under his breath, before opening a can of a fizzy drink from the mini cooler inside the car, and looking outside the window.Â
âI havenât even packed my stuff, Wonwoo. I can shift in once Iâve got my stuff ready.â
âYou donât know how many eyes are following us? What will the media think if we get off at different apartments tonight? It was hard enough stopping my parents from booking us a honeymoon suite.âÂ
You sigh. Heâs right. But he doesnât stop talking.
âYouâve got time now, read the guidebook.â
âJust tell me whatâs in it, Wonwoo. Stop making such a fuss about it. Also what the fuck is a guidebook without my suggestions.â
âIf youâd read it, you would have made suggestions, darling. I wasted my time going to your place last night. Anyway, if you need anything urgently from your apartment, Iâll send my secretary to fetch it for you.â
âNo thanks. I donât need anything.â
Thank god youâre familiar with Wonwooâs apartment, because you immediately lock yourself in the bedroom and take off your dress. Once itâs off, you unlock the room, and find an exasperated Wonwoo standing outside. âWoman, why are you monopolising territory already?â
âJust go change in the guest room, Wonwoo.â You push past him, dressed in underwear, carrying your heavy dress and laying it across the living room sofa to avoid creases from forming. Then you head straight into the bathroom to clean your makeup and take a shower. 30 minutes later you emerge, and Wonwooâs nowhere to be seen.Â
After a few minutes you find him on the small personal rooftop that extends from his apartment through a small flight of stairs. Youâd never gone to the roof, but now you see it has a nice bench on it, and is surrounded by lights.Â
Wonwooâs smoking.Â
âI didnât know you smoked.â
âI didnât know you were going to hoard my space as soon as you entered my house.â
He doesnât look at you, still gazing out at the Seoul skyline.Â
âYou couldâve used the other one.â
âYou couldâve used the other one.â
You breathe in once, and then speak again.Â
âIâm going to bed. Iâm really tired.â
âWait.â He finally turns around, and you can see his hair is completely messed up and his eyebags are visible under his glasses again.Â
âDid you take my clothes?â
âJust a pajama shirt.â
He nods, seeing what youâre wearing. The cool breeze makes your skin tingle, almost making you regret taking off your bra and wearing only panties under the shirt.Â
âGoodnight.â
âYouâre not coming along?â
He turns away again. Well, fuck it. Itâs not like youâre going to butter him up for a response. And yet when you go downstairs again, you make sure to sleep on the left side of the bed, like youâd always done whenever youâd slept together before. You donât know why you do it, but you go to sleep assuming heâll eventually come to bed.
_
He doesnât. The next morning, you wake up to see the other side of the bed absolutely empty and untouched. Heâs even taken away his pillow and blanket and you suddenly find yourself shivering. When youâre awake enough, you squint at the clock on the wall and figure out that itâs almost eleven in the morning. Quite late for someone like you. But then, it has been an exhausting day.Â
Did Wonwoo not sleep at all?
You put these thoughts away when you stumble into the washroom, nearly slipping because your step is unbalanced. But that minor shock completely jerks you awake at least.Â
Once youâve brushed your teeth (without even realising how your toothbrush had magically appeared in Wonwooâs bathroom even though you hadnât packed and brought a thing), you walk out of the room. Again, thereâs no sign of Wonwoo. The house is humid, from no windows being open, so you gently open up a few sources of ventilation. As the noise from the outside world begins to float into the house, the silence gets broken and you feel less claustrophobic. Sunshine falls on the simple upholstery and decorations of the house, and it makes everything shine. Itâs a hot day, but at least itâs a sunny day. You hate gloomy days.Â
You quickly search for Wonwoo in every room. And you eventually notice that the bed in the guest room seems to have been slept in last night. Was that where Wonwoo had slept last night?Â
It didnât make sense. Itâs not like you two had not shared a bed earlier. Sure, Wonwoo had never stayed in the same bed with you for longer than an hour after the sex, unless it was a marathon until the morning, and you rarely ever woke up next to his warm body, but it seemed absurd that heâs treating you like a complete stranger. Itâs not like the movies, for fucksâ sake. Youâre familiar with each other, even if youâre not in love. And sharing a bed isnât a big deal.Â
Exactly Y/N. So why are you making it such a big deal?
Thereâs a printout of something on the coffee table. You head over and see that it is the âguidebookâ heâs kept blabbering about. Why is he insisting that you read it? You have an impulse to go and dump it in the dustbin and push his limits a little further, but then you have pity on him. But itâs not like you wanted to stay with him either. Heâs the one who made you come and live with him. So technically, you shouldnât feel any remorse or pity. So you do dump the prints in the dustbin without a second look at it.Â
Thatâs when you hear your phone ring. âHello, Iâm speaking from ABC Packages. Weâre here to shift your packages from your old house to your new residence. Weâre waiting outside the door, are you at home?â Huh? âIâm sorry, who asked you to do this? Do you have a name?â âYes Ms. Y/L/N. The order came from a Jeon Wonwoo-ssi.â No wonder. âAaah. Okay, just wanted to confirm,â you quickly say to avoid any suspicion. âYes Iâm home. Iâll open the door.âÂ
And so the next hour is spent in a flurry of bringing in boxes, and when the delivery persons leave, you open them all. There seems to be enough space in Wonwooâs walk-in closet for your stuff, which isnât much at all. So you hang up all your formals, which form the majority of your clothing, and stash the rest of it in the shelves. Your shoes are also lesser than Wonwooâs and you barely have any accessories and makeup apart from essentials. The problem arises with your underwear and ⌠other personal belongings. Youâre not sure if Wonwoo would appreciate opening his underwear drawer to find your box of dildos stashed there. But thereâs no other space, so heâll just have to deal with it.Â
Thank God youâd taken the day off. Jisung had offered that staying away from work would make the impression of the honeymoon more imminent, and youâd agreed. Although it does seem like Wonwoo had gone to work all the same. And so, youâre left all alone in the house, and while itâs a little odd, you sit at almost every surface of the apartment to get used to it. Sure, youâve been sat at all of these before, in various positions, as Wonwoo had fucked you, but it feels different now under the sunlight. Youâre not surprised to find Wonwooâs fridge stocked almost completely with ample groceries, so making lunch isnât a hassle (apart from the fact that you barely know how to cook anything). But all-in-all, itâs not a tedious day, and youâre settling in nicely.Â
Until Wonwoo comes home, blazer on his arm and his hair messy. He lets himself in, but youâre sitting on the kitchen counter, checking out whatâs kept where. âOh, youâre here.â You turn around and see him flunking down on the sofa, legs sprawled out. âAre you that tired?â He doesnât answer at first, just stares at you for a second too long. âI am. Itâs been a long day.â âIâm making coffee, do y-â âNo. Iâm going to the gym now.â
Gym takes longer than you imagine. Itâs well past 10 pm when Wonwoo makes his way back, and youâve already finished your dinner of cup ramen and ice cream. He doesnât bother to look at you and wordlessly enters the guest bathroom. You consider entering the guest room and waiting for him, and then talking to him about why he slept separately, but then you drop it. You know he wonât answer you properly, and itâll be a waste of effort. You sigh and make your way to the bedroom, leaving the door unlocked and slightly ajar so that he knows heâs still invited inside.
_
Wonwoo and you arrive last at the little gathering your family has set up to celebrate the one month anniversary of your marriage. Wonwooâs family is here too, along with Kyungmin Oppa and your sister, and itâs a big group even for the large sprawling, and largely empty house, where you parents reside. Youâd think itâs easy to get lost in the crowd, but not when youâre the newly wed couple whoâs the focus of the party.Â
âIâm so disappointed yâall arenât going on a honeymoon,â your sister endlessly complains, and sheâs completely backed by the two mothers. âYes!â Your mother joins in. Just like the rest of the family members, she seems to have bought your wedding as 100% real as well, although she shouldâve been the first to connect the dots that youâre only doing this sham wedding for the sake of your fatherâs wishes. âI have itineraries planned for Bali, for Scandinavia, for the Maldives, or even for Japan, if you donât want to go too far!â She giggles, and the other ladies do too. You donât understand whatâs so funny. Especially when you know how little conversation youâve shared with your husband over the last month, in spite of not being strangers.Â
In fact that makes it worse, you think. Wonwooâs wearing a dark blue blazer over a white shirt which puts his pecs right in your face. You know what itâd be like to touch them, and bite all over them. The way he has his left hand pressed against the small of your back means he knows what itâd be like to just drop his hand an inch lower and feel your ass against his palm. Andit is worse because even though you know each other intimately, thereâs so little emotional connection you feel with him now. Whatever vulnerability had developed around him when heâd first agreed to the wedding had become hardened again under his cold attitude, and youâre back to just who you were when youâd grinded up against him at your sisterâs engagement party. You curse yourself for thinking that you could ever feel a nice way about Jeon Wonwoo, because honestly, look at the man. Heâs probably never regretted any decision taken after midnight as much as heâs regretted the decision to marry you.Â
When you sit down at the dinner table, you notice him not eating any of the seafood. You wonder if heâs just not hungry or rudely ignoring the special grilled fish that is your Appaâs speciality. Itâs probably the latter- some testosterone shit. And yet, heâs speaking charmingly smoothly with your Appa, even though Wonwooâs not much of a talker and you know that.Â
When he sits in the corner of the room, smiling and talking to your mother, you wonder what lies heâs spewing. Youâve noticed how easily lies come to him at the wedding itself, when heâd spinned tale upon tale about your âlove storyâ. I fell for her, honestly, for the first time, when sheâd walked into my class in ninth grade. You had scoffed, remembering the disgusted expression he had worn in reality, when heâd seen you being introduced into the class. Of course, weâve known each other for a long time now. Naturally, there have been ups and downs. Gosh, this reminds me of the time weâd gone on that date to the amusement park after our last day at school, huh? Weâd fought so bitterly after that, youâd think we were enemies. Haha. Youâd nearly laughed at that- your school had taken you all out to the amusement park on the last day of classes, and somehow Wonwoo and youâd been seated together on all the damn rides. Fuck him for laughing at you for becoming scared on the roller coaster rides and then pretending to take care of you when you had passed out in his arms at the very peak of the ride. You bet the teachers had cooed at him for being so chivalrous, when in reality it was a smack to your face.Â
When he leaves early, and leans in to press a kiss to your lips, you almost cringe away. It feels like youâre kissing a stranger even though his lips and the stubble on his jaw feel so familiar. This is the first time heâs shown you affection in front of others. Itâs all a show, you know. You gotta do whatâs needed to keep the show running. âIâll see you at home, sweetheart,â he says before pulling away and tucking your hair behind your ears. You search in his eyes for honesty, and all you find is a dark abyss.Â
_
But it seems like your family buys the facade again. Banking on the fact that they seem pleased with your husband, and on your good choice of marriage, you finally broach the real issue with your father. Youâre both sitting at the patio, sipping whisky after everyoneâs left and the two of you have some peace after a long day of chattering and feasting.
âAppa, thereâs something I want to talk to you about.â
âYes, Y/N-ah?â
You pause before answering. Finally, you decide to take the blunt route, knowing that thereâs no easy way about this.Â
âCome with me to the US for your treatment.â
He sighs. Itâs a sigh that sounds almost like a cough, and it makes you wonder how much phlegm is stored in his damaged lungs now. You wonder how you didnât notice it before.
âWho told you?â
âEomma.â
âOf course she did.â He sighs again, and looks at you. âAre you asking me or commanding me?âÂ
âAppa, Iâm not your boss. I canât command you.â
âBut youâre my daughter. I know how children feel when they think their parents arenât listening to them.â
You smile. âIâve always been stubborn, you know. Iâve got it in my genes.â
âGenes Iâm proud of. How much has your mother told you? Did she mention Iâm in stage 4 and itâs practically incurable?â
âYes, and no. There are still chances to cure it, Appa, if only youâll listen to me.â
âSweetie-â
âWhy arenât you giving this another chance? I didnât know you to be a person who easily gives up!â You can feel yourself getting angry, tears pooling in your eyes. Itâs stupid how heâs arguing against it, illogical, meaningless. Your heart breaks every time you look at his eyes- theyâre old, wrinkled, and yet the fire hasnât gone out. Does he really want to end it all this fast?
âYou know, I get where youâre coming from. But⌠I don't want to prolong suffering, Y/N-ah. Itâs time, I can feel it. Thereâs no point being a vegetable pushed about in a wheelchair and drinking soup for the rest of my life. Thereâs no point living if I have to just gobble medicines all day and not drink any more port wine. Thereâs no point living a life which isnât even a life, itâs just a laboratory experiment.â
You do burst out crying at this. You want to throttle his neck, and shake him, and ask how could he say such things.Â
âAaah, Y/N-ah! Donât cry-â
âYouâre making me cry, Appa! You didnât even tell me! Were you just planning to sit on it till itâs too late?â
âIt is never too late, Y/N-ah. Appa is always here with you, even if I canât be here physically.â
The tears donât stop, he pulls you closer, until youâre wailing on his shoulder, and he hugs you with one arm.Â
âItâs not fair,â you mumble in between tears, hiccups interspersed in your words. Then he only rubs your back and you gently quieten down. âI donât care, Appa. Come to the US with me. Iâve spoken to doctors, theyâve said there are chances to improve.â He smiles wistfully, looking at your face, which is childishly covered in snot and wet tears.
âAppa, you have to promise me youâll try. For me, please. Iâm not ready for this.â
âIt will be a waste of time and effort. I would rather you pay attention to your career. And also your marriage.â âThereâs not much to pay attention to. Wonwoo and I are busy almost all the time,â you try to dismiss him. âBut you are young, and in love. I should believe thereâs nothing other than your love life you should pay more attention to.â You sigh. Itâs sad, just how well you and Wonwoo have deceived them all, even your most observant father. You wonder how it is possible, given how distant the two of you are- emotionally, always, and physically, recently. âThere is something called urgency, Appa. Thereâs an order to how things need to be done.âÂ
Thereâs a few long minutes of silence. Your father finishes the drink in his glass and looks at the stars in the sky. You, for one moment, are sure heâll put up another fight. âYouâve never asked me anything with so much insistence, Y/N-ah.â âYouâve not hidden anything from me before, either.â Thereâs another pause. The waiting is tiring, and youâre going to cry again.Â
âAlright. Iâll do it, Y/N. But on one condition.â You hang on to his words, waiting for him to continue. âOne chance. Iâm not going back again if there is a relapse. I will not push my fate to a sour ending. You go back to your life, where I want to see you happy. And I will let nature take its due course.â You dare to smile, too afraid heâs going to take back his words. But then he smiles back, and beckons you to lie down on his lap, as he begins talking about something new he;s recently read, and youâre grateful for the distraction.Â
That night when you go home, you find Wonwoo playing in his gaming room. Itâs a small room, probably meant to be a spare bedroom, or a kidâs bedroom, but he has an elaborate gaming setup there, and he locks himself up in it every weekend. Sometimes you wonder if heâs dead, but then you hear his cocky, hushed whispers of victory when you lean on the door. Heâs always been good at games.Â
Today the door is slightly open, and you think for a deluded moment, that he perhaps left it open so that he could hear you enter the house. So you lightly knock and he turns around in his gaming chair. You realise heâs wearing a tank top, his hair hidden under a hideous beanie, and for a second, he doesnât look like the brooding adult youâre married to.Â
âI spoke to Appa tonight.â
He looks up at you and takes off his headphones. He nods once, understanding immediately.
âIâm leaving for New York tomorrow, and I donât want to delay the appointment.âÂ
He stares at you for a second, then replies, âWhen is your flight?âÂ
âAfternoon.â
âAnd how long are you going to be away?â
âI donât know. Perhaps a month, perhaps longer. I donât want to leave until itâs all done. I want to see it to the end.â
He nods again, standing up from his chair. The screen flashes something about the game being paused, and his character awkwardly bounces about in the game field. The character has black hair and wears glasses like Wonwoo.Â
âPack enough, then. Iâll be here when you come back.â
You nod, and he smiles. This is why you got married in the first place, afterall. You bet heâs glad to get the wheels moving as quickly as possible so that this farce can come down before heâs so tired of it that your mere sight repels you.
_
The next three months pass by like a whirlwind, a miracle from heaven. Because not only are the doctors extremely positive about your fatherâs condition, but also hopeful for complete treatment. A part of you is too wary of everything going too great, too good to be true, and youâre crying every night when you lie sleepless in your hotel bed. Thereâs not a single second youâre free from anxiety, and thereâs literally nothing else in your mind except praying that every minute of the treatment goes well. Youâve never been so nervous, except when youâd been in college and getting your papers approved by your professors and theyâd laughed straight up in your face at your ambitiousness. You get periodic calls from your colleagues, the managers and Jisung, most often. But if thereâs a perk of being a CEO, itâs that your employees know when to respect your personal space, unless thereâs an absolute emergency. Relatives call you, your sister calls you ever so often. You hope she doesnât go into labour with your father still stuck on the hospital bed, but itâs only a small part of her worries, youâre sure. So you assure her about everything being alright and encourage to focus on her pregnancy being perfectly smooth, although Kyungmin Oppa tells you that her mood swings are more distinct now with more things to worry about. The baby kicks for the first time, and you wish you could be there. You donât want to miss a lot of firsts, but itâs a small tradeoff you donât mind making.Â
Thereâs only one person who doesnât call you, Wonwoo. He probably knows that you donât want to be disturbed, but sometimes you have thoughts. Thoughts about how different your life was just a few months ago. Thoughts about how your marriage is due to be annulled as soon as this business ends. Thoughts about whether you should have let Wonwoo ever into your life. Thoughts about how he feels about this entire thing. You know how heâd said he had just wanted to help you, but was it a moment of pity or a calculated decision? Was he actually humane enough to want to do this? Youâre unsure, just like youâre unsure about how much you even know him. Sure, youâve known him for your entire damn life, but not really.Â
Firstly, thereâs the matter of the wedding. The fact that Wonwoo didnât actually need to be roped in to convince your dad is a surprising issue. You hadnât expected Appa to be so pliant to your words and your tears, when he had supposedly protested so much in front of Unnie and Eomma. Well, there perhaps was something called a favourite child. Secondly, thereâs the concern of what happens now. Itâs already been four months since your wedding, and itâs almost mid-December now. Youâre 100% sure that Wonwoo will not be interested to drag on this farce for longer than necessary, so you mentally take notes to draft up divorce letters and take them to him as soon as you return to Seoul. Your PR teamâs done a fairly good job in hiding the fact that you and Wonwoo have barely spent any time together since the wedding. So itâs not going to take much to silence the media if they raise eyebrows at such a quick divorce. Family will be easy to convince, as well. We just donât have enough time for a full-on relationship now. Weâre focused on our careers, thatâs where our priorities lie. Honestly, this was why we were so hesitant about marriage in the first place. See, we told you, we weren't made for this relationship business. If only you hadnât practically stalked us into it, we wouldnât have to disappoint you all like this.Â
And what happens after that?Â
Do you remain exes who smile at each other at social gatherings? Do you remain fuckbuddies, forgetting about your trash past altogether? Do you become strangers who donât even bother to remember birthdays?Â
Youâre feeling dizzy, so you pass out on the couch in your hotel room.Â
_
Itâs New Yearsâ Eve when you return to Seoul, and nobody can stop the smile on your face from breaking out every three seconds. Your fatherâs body may still be weak from chemotherapy, and he may have to visit the hospital every other week to get follow-ups on his treatment, but heâs alive and the spark in his eyes havenât been snuffed out. Thereâs hope, infinite hope, and you feel whole again. Thereâs incredible joy blooming in your heart, even if all the trees are barren and all the world is grey. The doctors say that it is a godsent gift, and there can be a relapse, but the chances are low enough to be confident that thereâs going to be at least five more years of happy life for your father. For someone who was praying for five more minutes, itâs a harvest too bountiful, and you feel like a person born again.Â
The happiness lasts the entire journey back home, back into the wide waiting arms of your mother who had never gone to the US because she was too scared of being there. You can see how the stress has taken a toll on her, as her figure seems frailer than before, and thereâs no longer than glow radiating off her face. And yet, this gift is more than she, or you could ever have asked for, so you take what you can get. Your fatherâs organs havenât failed yet, and he can eat better things than soup, so your motherâs cooked specially for him, although she hasnât entered the kitchen in years. Itâs softly cooked galbi and prawn pajeon, and he devours the meal after months of hospital food. You stay the night at your parentâs home, as your sister comes over along with her husband. Itâs a great family reunion, and you feel like you could die in this happiness.
Except reality strikes when you wake up the next morning and realise that you should go to your actual home now. You wonder if heâs going to be at home or not, given that itâs the New Year and he may have plans with others.Â
But there he is, as you let yourself in through the main door, and he locks eyes with you sitting on the couch, wearing shorts and no shirt, his hair quite wet. Apart from the fact that this is the first time youâve seen him wear shorts, nothingâs changed. Heâs still exactly the same. Itâs cold outside, and the journey here has frozen your limbs, but the house is warm as fuck, just how Wonwooâs always liked it.Â
You canât stop yourself. You donât stop yourself when you run halfway across the living room and hug him without waiting for him to say anything.Â
To his credit, he doesnât say anything. He simply hugs you back. His body is so warm in spite of being shirtless, and you can smell the fresh soap clinging to his body. He rubs one hand on your spine and for a second you feel tears threatening to flow down your face. Did you miss him?
âHowâs your father?âÂ
âMuch better. There is hope.â
You can feel his hands moving more insistently on your back, stretching through all your muscles. It feels comforting in a way youâve never received from Wonwoo. He doesnât ask anything else, and you donât mind.Â
âWelcome home, Y/N.â
_
Youâre bent over on the floor, unpacking your suitcase in your own room when he casually saunters into his walk-in and you donât pay heed. Itâs only when he walks out wearing a black leather jacket, a turtleneck, a light gold chain dangling on his neck, and fancy sunglasses perched on his nose that you turn around to look at him. Youâre shocked at seeing him like this- you realise you havenât seen him in casuals in so long. You havenât seen him in so long.Â
âYouâre going out?â
âYeah, it is the New Year. I have a party with my friends.â
Youâre too busy ogling him, so he asks, âDonât you have plans?âÂ
âYeah, Iâm going to unpack my stuff.â
âYou could do that tomorrow. Going out with friends on New Yearsâ will not happen tomorrow.â
You roll your eyes. You assume I have friends. It shouldnât be news to him, youâve told him this before. And yet, you feel embarrassed again. You didnât know Wonwoo had friends, but itâs wrong of you to think every workaholic has no life like you.Â
âNo. Itâs been a tiring few months⌠Iâd rather just sleep in.â
Wonwoo, surprisingly, sits down on your bed, facing you, and removes his sunglasses. You can see his pretty eyes from up close, and you realise that heâs never really sat on this bed since youâve come to his house. âDo you want to come with me? Theyâve been asking about you for quite some time now.â You look at him silently, âNah, I donât⌠donât want to barge in.â âYou wonât be.â âYouâll get late if you wait for me now.â âItâs not a big deal, most of them will be late anyway.â âAre you going to a nightclub?â âNo, weâre going to a barbecue party.âÂ
Small, private, cosy. Youâll definitely be barging in.
âNo Wonwoo, I donât want to go somewhere where Iâm not welcome. And anyway, Iâm cool with whatever youâve told your friends about us.â âI havenât said anything in particular.â âWell, then youâre good at avoiding things.â âI am. You mustâve been away too long if youâve forgotten about this.âÂ
You want to run away. Heâs surely talking about avoiding being your husband- and heâs proud about it as well.Â
âThen you might avoid it further. Thereâs no need for me to make a public appearance.â
Wonwoo stares at you for a second too long. His jaw hardens, and you can see his tongue in his cheek. Then he gently pulls your hand into his own, and carefully touches your fingers, purposely avoiding the bit around your wedding ring. The way your fingers seem much smaller compared to his makes you feel a certain way. You pull your hand back, but he doesnât let go. He ends up pulling you up to stand, so that heâs still sitting on the edge of the bed and youâre standing right in front of him. His fingers are still laced around your own, and you feel sparks at the touch after months.Â
âIâm going to show my wife off to my friends. And your excuses are pathetic, darling. You know you want me to show you off as well.â His fingers tighten their grip against your wrist, and you feel the vein in your wrist throbbing around his touch. âSo get dressed nicely. I know you clean up well.â
It takes you a solid ten minutes to find something good to wear. Sure, youâre not big on fashion, but you like to look fit for the occasion. Especially if Wonwooâs dressed up all fancily like that. But when you finally step out of the closet, youâre wearing a beige corset top with a black skirt, and a long black coat with tiny gold details. You find Wonwoo still sitting on your bed, scrolling through his phone. âHow do I look?â you ask at the same time as he raises his head to look at you. After checking you out twice from top to toe, he nods slowly, but before you can exhale in relief, he says, âWill you feel cold in that skirt?â âNo. And before you ask, Iâm not wearing stockings. The coat will be enough.â âDonât complain if you get cold later. Come down in five.âÂ
_
When youâre finally in the car, you ask him if you should buy something for the host, since it is New Yearsâ afterall. âIf we bought something for him, the others will be mad at us for not buying something for them too.â You laugh it off, wondering how that could be possible, and proceed to stop at a nearby store to buy one of the trendy perfumes thatâs popular amongst men these days.Â
You find, not even half an hour later, that it is possible.Â
âWonwoongi! You only brought presents for Mingoo? None for hyung? How will hyung survive without your generosity?â A lanky, beautiful man immediately latches himself onto Wonwooâs arm as soon as you both enter Mingyuâs house. Itâs a pretty bungalow situated a little far from the city, and decorated extravagantly with lights. Itâs only after Wonwoo makes it through the first few people crowding near the entryway that everybody notices you.Â
Thereâs a collective gasp going around when everyone turns around and looks at you, smiles galore. And then they all start speaking together, and you get overwhelmed. Wonwoo shushes them all in an uncharacteristically loud voice, and announces, âSince yâall wanted to meet her, this is Y/L/N Y/N, my wife,â and you bow deeply to everyone as everyone greets you back. When you stand upright again, you stumble a bit, not having noticed the thick carpet, and Wonwooâs quick to grab your hand. He casually interlocks his fingers with yours, and you both make your way into the apartment.Â
The first man you meet is Mingyu, the host. Youâre shocked to see him, not expecting to see him as the host. So heâs the host. Heâs become taller than Wonwoo now, his face still identical to what you remember from high school. It sparks an annoyance in you, as scenes from each sports day of your high school years flashes by. There wasnât a single time when you hadnât defeated Mingyu in tennis, badminton and squash. You really loved playing racket sports, and it seemed that so did Mingyu. But not just that- Mingyuâs arrogance was even more childish than that of Wonwoo because he was insanely arrogant about his looks and the number of girls (and boys) thirsting over him every day. Although you hardly met him outside school because he didnât belong to a chaebol family, youâd actively glare at each other every time you met in school. You wonder what version of these same memories flashed in his mind as you stand in front of him now.Â
âItâs been a long time, Y/N-ah. Didnât imagine that you and Wonwoo would end up married.â Itâs a genuine smile, and for a moment, you wonder if youâd had the wrong impression about him all along. âWe didnât imagine it either, trust me.â Wonwoo smiles, and it breaks you out of your reverie. You hand Mingyu the gift, and say, âThank you for extending your invitation to me.â âThereâs no need to be so formal, Y/N-ah. But whatâs the need for the gift?â âSince Iâm visiting you for the first time⌠as Mrs. Jeon, I felt I shouldnât come empty-handed.â Mingyu giggles and nudges Wonwooâs arm, âMrs Jeon, hmm? Feels like a Hollywood movie. Thanks Y/N, Iâll use it well!â
Then Wonwoo introduces you to the rest of his friend group one by one. You meet Seungcheol, who you remember all too well. âHow the tables have turned, huh?â He chuckles, before handing you a glass of wine. Thereâs a familiarity in his mysterious smile, that twinkling look in his eyes, that elite tilt of his chin, as if he owned the world, which used to annoy the hell out of you, because to you, he seemed to be the stereotype of the worthless chaebol heirs whoâd do nothing in their lives except eat out of their parentsâ money. And yet, heâs made it big on his own, if news reports are correct, and perhaps you can find some respect for him now. âI hope we get along better this time, Seungcheol Oppa.â Heâs the only man from Wonwooâs high school group who you would call Oppa, and that was only to tease him because heâd been voted as the Sexiest Oppa of the Year at the end of the high school year. Seungcheol seems to remember that too, because he laughs, and you realise itâs a fond memory, no matter how much annoyance it had sparked in you back then.Â
Then thereâs Jeonghan, whoâd been that beautiful man whoâd spoken to Wonwoo earlier with that aegyo nickname of Wonwoongie. who disarms you instantly with his jokes. Joshua, whoâs introduced as the gentleman, but you can see the mischief in his doe-like eyes, much too good-looking for his own good. Thereâs Soonyoung and Seokmin, who are already playing beer pong, laughing and spilling a lot of the beer on the table (and the carpet, but they implore you to not tell Mingyu that). Seungkwan referees them, while heâs wrapped around his boyfriend, whoâs extremely charming and interesting. Vernon and you speak for a good two minutes before Seungkwan interrupts you both and takes you to meet Jun. Jun is sitting on the other side of the room, with his girlfriend, Lihua. Sheâs also Chinese but speaks fluent Korean, as sheâs a teacher in Seoul, as she explains.You find out that Jun is an actor in both Korean and Chinese tv shows, and his visuals explain a lot of it, for sure. Then thereâs Minghao, whoâs busy discussing Met Gala looks over the years with two women, Soyeon (Jihoonâs fiance) and Aeri (Chanâs girlfriend). Chan and Jihoon themselves are missing, but soon you find them in the kitchen, helping Mingyu and his fiance, Hayi, to make cocktails.Â
And when the introductions finally end, Wonwoo and you flop down on a couch in one corner, both tired from all that smiling and small talk.Â
âAre you sighing so loudly because theyâre not nice?â He teases you, as he place an arm around the head of the sofa, successfully cradling you without even touching your body. âWonwoo. I didnât know you were still close to Seungcheol and Mingyu.â âHmm⌠should I have warned you before bringing you here?â You turn your face away from him, âA warning would have been nice. I wasnât really ready to see Mingyuâs annoying smile again after all those years of his delinquency.â Wonwoo laughs, and you continue, âBut Iâm curious. What did you tell them about me that theyâre welcoming me with open arms? Did you tell them that Iâve completely changed or something?â âNo. They had their reservations too, but itâs not like they could do anything. I told them only a day before we got married.â You open your mouth to refute, but quickly become silent. Not for the first time, you wonder, how had Wonwoo adapted into the marriage so quickly in spite of having nothing to gain and everything to lose. It reminds you of the divorce papers you had asked Jisung to prepare, so you donât say anything.
Jeonghan comes and sits on your other side too. âOh, we have another person joining our lazy line, I see.â He giggles as you look confused. âWonwoo, Hao and I are the lazy line. We run out of battery first. We canât keep up with the other over-energetic boy.â âBut the absolute first is Wonwoo, of course. Thereâs no end to group photos where heâs yawning in all the shots.â Minghao strolls in, grabs Wonwoo by the arm, calling him to the other room where theyâre all playing billiards, and then itâs just you and Jeonghan on the sofa.Â
âSo, Y/N, I hear that you and Wonwoo have been friends since school?â You laugh, because he canât have heard that. You know Jeonghan knows you both have never really been friends. He laughs too, and you realise how easily heâs prodded right into the truth. âItâs complicated,â you say safely, as you get a feeling you canât hide from this man. âAnd yet I think youâre perfectly fit to be Mrs Jeon, from what I hear.â You laugh again, because genuinely it is a funny statement. You think heâs making a joke- probably about how you both hated each otherâs guts in school, or had an equal temper. But no, heâs all serious and he repeats his statement with more sincerity. You twist your lips in confusion, and ask him, âHow can you say that?â âBecause I know Wonwoo very well. Thatâs it.â He then laughs a bit and continues, âThey call me the Eomma of the group for a reason, you know. Theyâre all my kids. Even Cheol and Shua.â
And then Wonwoo calls you both to the barbecue which had begun on the outdoor patio.Â
_
The party may have begun awkwardly for you but it soon becomes quite exciting. The temperature continues to fall as it becomes darker in the night sky, but everyoneâs gathered around the barbecue grill outside so you donât want to move. The girls are mostly sitting together, sitting cocktails that Mingyu prepares for you, winking every way until he reaches his fiance who exaggeratedly winks back. You sit sandwiched between Aeri and Wonwoo, and while Wonwoo is busy discussing games with Seungcheol, Aeri doesnât let you feel isolated. Youâre included into the group surprisingly quickly, and soon youâre playing drinking games with them. Games youâve never played before, so youâre obviously totally incapable at defeating them. They seem to play these every other weekend, while youâve never even heard of these game rules. The reality sends pangs to your heart because it hits harder than ever that youâve never had a friend group with who you could drink with. Not even a casual drink. Not even a girlsâ night out. Not even a pole dance at a strip club.Â
âOkay! Letâs play the hongsam game,â Seungkwan shouts out and immediately everyone cheers in agreement. You must be looking confused as hell, because Jihoon quietly leans in to explain the rules simply. Seungkwan and Jihoon show you a small demo, and you nod. You may not have understood fully but you donât want to hold up others in the game. And so the game goes on for nineteen rounds, and you lose ten of them. You somehow miss the timing every time, or maybe you just donât know their names well enough. Even Joshua, who messed up the first three times, seems to have caught on, but youâre just stuck. Although they make you feel better about it, laughing with you instead of at you, and reassuring you that itâs okay to make mistakes, you feel embarrassed. Itâs not a tough game, just requires hand-eye-brain coordination that youâre sure youâre not lacking in, but perhaps some part of you wants to do better because itâs Wonwooâs friends youâre playing with, and performing poorly here would mean⌠well, you donât know what it would mean, but it doesnât sit right with you. So you try to be more competitive, and although you keep losing, as the shots go in, it feels less stressful and more fun. You become more familiar with the games, and the S.coups game youâre actually good at, although you have no idea why itâs called the S.coups game and Seungcheol personally makes it a point to threaten anyone whoâs about to tell you why itâs called the S.coups game.Â
And so, as the night goes by, you become more comfortable. Even if it is still a little awkward, itâs not altogether bad. Mingyu and Seungcheol are being nice to you, although a bit wary. The others have positively welcomed you with open arms. And Wonwoo, well, heâs being a little odd. Heâs having a hell lot of fun, being much louder than youâve ever seen him. He seems more reserved than his friends, but then, his friends are too hyper. And while he doesnât make direct efforts to talk to you, heâs becoming more touchy by the minute. The first few shots in, he was just putting an arm around your shoulders. Next few shots in, his hands are properly rubbing all over your bare arms as he makes you open the coat when you say your bodyâs getting warm with all the soju. When you feel the buzz of alcohol getting more serious by the second, his right hand, the same one which had held your hand earlier that day, places itself on your thigh and refuses to move. Itâs splayed all over your thigh, nearly covering from end to end, and thereâs not much skin showing anyway, but with his hand, it feels like you shouldâve worn a shorter skirt.Â
Wonwooâs favourite game is the mafia one. The game app somehow generates him to be mafia three out of four times, and he has way too much fun killing the innocent citizens who seem to be completely deceived by him. Wonwooâs too good at lying, you realise, when youâre taken aback each time on finding out heâs the mafia although youâre sitting right next to him. The fifth round, you both are mafias, and after the penultimate round of guessing, when you two are the only mafias left alive and you lock eyes to decide who to kill, you giggle at the way heâs staring you down.Â
âI say, Soyeon. Sheâs the closest to guessing me out.â You say seriously, but his eyes arenât even on your eyes. Theyâre fixed lower, at your lips, but you panic and shift away from him. Now his eyes look up at yours, confused, but youâre guessing heâs just drunk. He would never behave like this if he were sober.Â
âI say letâs get out of here. While their eyes are still closed.â He smirks, whispering hotly in front of your face, and you feel red all over.Â
âWonwoo! Theyâre your friends.â âSo what? They love you already. They wouldnât be mad at you for leaving, if thatâs what youâre thinking.â âDonât be ridiculous. Youâre having so much fun, why would you want to leave?â âBecause I know I could have more fun with you with my face under that skirt of yours.â Youâre blushing again. âYou donât want to know the number of times Iâve left fun gatherings like this to fuck you in my car, sweetheart. This time, at least, theyâll understand better.â You blush even harder, with the way heâs speaking. Itâs making your heart beat too loudly. You know itâs because you both are drunk, but youâve never been able to resist it when he talks dirty to you. And now his hand starts squeezing your thigh, so youâre left wondering what it would feel like if his face was under your sk-
âOh for fucks sake! I know itâs Wonwoo and Y/N with all this whispering, Iâm sitting next to yâall, guys!â Aeri whines from next to you, and the moment is broken. Everyone opens their eyes and Wonwooâs hand stop squeezing, although itâs still on your thigh. âIf youâre going to undress each other, just go home!â Chan says, and you laugh. âIâm not leaving the party even if Wonwoo does, just so you know. Iâm having way too much fun.â Aeri and Hayi hug you from one end, pulling you away from Wonwoo. âYes,â says Hayi, âweâre not letting you go either. Boring mafia men can leave if they like.â So they pull you away from Wonwoo and you end up sitting somewhere far away from him, between Joshua and Minghao, and itâs nice to be around people who arenât game aces either and you can have a lot more fun because theyâre not as serious as Wonwoo.
A few seconds later, your phone buzzes in your pocket, so you take it out. Thereâs a text from Wonwoo.Â
I wasnât kidding, Y/N. I really want to get out of here with you.
_
Twenty minutes later, youâve bid the last round of goodbyes, hugging Jeonghan and exchanging numbers with most of them, while they whine about why Wonwoo gatekept you for so long. Even Seungcheol and Mingyu joke around you, showing that theyâve become more comfortable around you. Perhaps growing up has taken away some of their jerk attitude from them.Â
Wonwooâs already leaning against his car when you walk out of the house. You know heâs drunk with the way his eyes check you out without any filter, and youâre also drunk and out of your inhibitions. You try not to get into your head as he opens the door for you, and you get inside the warm car. Wonwoo joins you in the backseat, and the chauffeur drives you out slowly.Â
But somehow, being in the car now, away from the dopamine of the party, and the general excitement from having a surprisingly fun evening with strangers, the overthinking does kick in. Wonwoo doesnât say a word, but his hand has returned on your thigh, and you let it be there. But you canât help but think, is he finding you attractive only because heâs under the influence?Â
So you ask him that, when you both get out of the car and he opens the door to the apartment. Drunk, dishevelled Wonwoo looks glorious in the night light, his dark hair falling over his eyes, which are hooded in desire as plain as day. âAre you fucking serious, woman?â Thatâs all he says, before he pushes you against the back of the same entry door, and puts his hand under your skirt. He finds you panties as an obstruction so he pushes them aside before kissing you and entering one finger inside your cunt simultaneously. You immediately melt under his touch, not just because itâs been months since Wonwooâs touched you, but also because youâre feeling so relieved heâs still attracted to you. At least the farce hasnât repelled him away this far.Â
So you donât speak any words. You both stay silent except the sounds he forces out of you. You come embarrassingly fast with just two fingers up your vagina, and his mouth creating hickeys all over your neck. âFuck, Wonwoo, I-â âShit youâre still coming- your whore pussyâs thanking Sir for taking care of her after so long?â You moan his name harder, your entire body writhing under his touch as he drags out your climax under his touch. âYes, Sir.â âAnd what to good girls say in gratitude?â You can barely form the words but you say it, âThank- thank you, Sir!â
âWhere do you wanna take it, hmm? To my bedroom which youâve taken over? Or my bedroom where youâve exiled me to?â He picks you up and shrugs off your coat, and you wrap your legs around him, stretching the skirt. âIt doesnât matter.â
So he takes you to the bedroom where heâs sleeping these days. He flunks you on the bed, and you tumble to fall on your face. The sheets smell like him, and you breathe in his scent. You donât want to sleep anywhere else after this- only next to him, if this is what his bed smells like.Â
He leans in from behind you, and unhooks your top and skirt, leaving you in your underwear. Your panties are ruined, so he makes quick work of removing them. But he keeps the bra on, and gently slides in under you until your pussy is on his face as he prepares to eat you out from behind. His hands are splayed over your ass, and as soon as his tongue makes contact with your already abused vagina, you scream out his name. But he doesnât stop- he continues, his tongue harshly fucking your cunt. When heâs done making you orgasm again like that, and youâre done screaming his name into his pillow, he finally moves away from you. You fall limp on the bed, as you hear him take off his clothes. Eventually he cages you from behind, and slowly fills you up from behind, one hand on your neck and the other rubbing your nipple over your bra.Â
So he fucks you like that, his cold chain makes sparks every time it brushes against your spine. âSir, please! Faster, please-â Wonwoo doesnât reply to any of your begging, but he responds physically to everything you say, by doing the exact opposite and dragging out your misery. His hands donât leave your nipples as he leisurely fucks you. âFuck, Y/N, not even four months, and youâre tight like a virgin again.â Your hands slip and weakly try to clutch at the bedsheets, but you feel useless, like a toy, and he feels every inch of skin which heâs missed out on all this time. You donât know what heâs looking like now, but his hand presses your head down on the pillow softly, and his grunts and moans are soft enough to be enveloped by your own louder moans and pants.
âPlease, Iâm begging you, please- pl- faster- Sir!â And the second he lifts his body away from yours, thrusting into you faster, you spasm and orgasm right there, and it triggers his orgasm too. The warmth of his cum flowing inside you stays there as he gently falls down on your body, panting. When he begins to pull out, you whine, unable to say anything but he gets the message. He lies down next to you softly, without pulling out for a few minutes. When your body finally comes down from the high, you go limp around his body, and Wonwoo gently pulls out.Â
âIâll clean you up.â âIâm sleepyâŚâ âYeah, then sleep.â And then you pass out.
_
When you wake up the next morning, Wonwoo is, unsurprisingly, not next to you, although his side of the bed is not cold. It feels like an upgrade, and you take what you can get. For the first time since youâve gotten married, youâve slept together and the thought of it makes you pleased for some reason.Â
âMorning,â he walks in, before you can properly wake up. Heâs wearing a peach-coloured hoodie with sweatpants, a cup of coffee in his hand. âIs that for me?â âNo, I didnât know if you were up.â âOkay, Iâll go and get my own.â
So you do. You brush your teeth and make your coffee and return to the bedroom, and Wonwooâs still sitting there, his back leaning against the headboard. For a second, you feel like youâre stepping into someone elseâs married life, but then you realise itâs yours. It makes you giddy. You donât understand why- itâs not like youâve ever craved for Wonwoo, or anyone, in this way. But somehow, youâve warmed up well to the idea of having him as your ⌠partner. Thereâs nobody who could be an equal match to you, to be honest. Either theyâd be seriously less intelligent and you would be able to hold no conversation with them, or theyâd be arrogant as fuck if they were smarter than you, and theyâd make it a point to make you feel lesser, always. So Wonwoo is the perfect match for you.Â
Although, Wonwoo could surely find someone better. Jeonghanâs words float in your brain once again, and you fight the urge to contradict him. Mrs Jeon could definitely be someone else- someone whoâs less distant from Wonwoo, someone he could love truly deeper than just skin-level attraction, someone who would want to be with him for real feelings and not just a facade.
âThereâs something I want to talk to you about, Wonwoo.âÂ
âYeah, me too.â You both sit against the headboard, bodies far apart, as if repelled again by magnetic force, no matter how close you were last night.Â
âOkay, you go first then.â
So he says, âLast night was⌠a mistake. I know it sounds cliche, but itâs true. I donât⌠want to do this with you.â
Oh fuck. You did not see that coming. Sure, the relationship could have been a mistake. Getting married without him getting anything out of it could have been a mistake. Continuing this marriage after your dadâs treatment was successful could have been a mistake. But last night? Last night had felt so right to you. There was no one who knew your body like Wonwoo did, and you knew it went the other way round too. Then how could he say that?
He continues, âI donât want to be fuckbuddies with you like this, Y/N. We got married for a goal, and now that goalâs been fulfilled andâŚâ
âAnd you want a divorce. I get it.âÂ
He looks at you with confusion, his eyes wide and his eyebrows furrowed. âNo, thatâs not what I said.âÂ
âThatâs what you meant. Iâm an adult, Wonwoo, donât teach me nuances.â You get off the bed and walk away.Â
âY/N, youâve got to hear me out when Iâm saying something.â
âWonwoo, I already know what youâre trying to say.âÂ
âFuck you, Y/N. This is why itâs not possible to have a proper conversation with you.â
âYouâll get what you want, Wonwoo. Donât worry. Thanks for telling me, I needed to know.â
_
It feels good to get back to work after so long. The familiar sound of people typing away on their laptops and the busy movement of people everywhere, it brings peace to your heart. There are people hovering around you, hoping to speak to you, but Jisung somehow brings you to your office without you having to say anything more than good morning and happy new year to anyone.Â
Itâs only when you enter the office and you see the pending paperwork that you realise just how much youâve missed. Thereâs a deal with Lee Corp. thatâs sitting on your desk, and Jisung presents it to you with a proud smile. âWe got it done, Maâam. Every detail you wanted, to the t.â You donât know how to respond, because itâs unbelievable. âBut how?â This is your dream- signing a contract with Lee Corp., the leading organisation for facilitating stools for robotic surgery in Korea. Although your technology has always been more modern, theyâve retained their large market share because of simply how long theyâve sustained in the business- after all, when it comes to health, trust comes before modernity for customers.Â
âJeon Wonwoo-ssi set up the deal for us. The Deputy CEO and myself attended the meeting, I can share the minutes with-â
âWait, stop. Wonwoo, you said?âÂ
âYes Maâam, I⌠did he not tell you? He told me heâd tell you.â Jisung looks genuinely confused, so you know itâs futile to investigate him further.Â
âWell, as you can see, itâs news to me.â
âThere is a meeting today, at noon, Maâam, I need to brief you about the details before you-âÂ
âIâll get the details directly from Wonwoo, thanks Jisung. Ask my chauffeur to get my car ready please. Iâll be back before the meeting.â
_
Wonwooâs office building is bustling with the same energy as your own, and you face no trouble finding his office. So you walk right in.Â
âWhatâs this Iâm hearing?â Heâs standing next to a shorter man showing him something on a tablet, but he immediately leaves when he sees you, bowing quickly. âI was busy, Y/N, you canât just walk in like that as if you own the place.â He walks up to you, and gently closes the door, before leaning against it and asking you, in that fucking relaxed expression he always has, âWhatâs the matter?âÂ
âYou fixed a deal with Lee Corp. for my company?âÂ
âWhat about it?âÂ
âAnd you didnât bother to tell me?â
âI thought it was best not to disturb you when you were busy with your father.â
Your eyes widen in disbelief. âWonwoo, this is literally the most important event that can turn my career around forever, and you choose not to tell me-â
âSo youâd rather I invade your privacy for this? Iâd arranged it so that it would be closed only after your return anyway, so itâs not like-â
âItâs exactly like you were making deals behind my back! God knows what subscript youâve mentioned in the clauses with the Lees- yeah, step one: get into a trusting contract with Y/N, step two: slowly overtake all her market power, step three: make the company so weak that Jeon Estates can easily take over.âÂ
Youâve taken a step closer with every word, and now youâre standing at a hairâs distance from Wonwoo, whoâs just staring at you. âFor godâs sake, Jeon Wonwoo, say something!âÂ
And then, he fucking laughs. Itâs a bitter laugh, one with no mirth, and it makes goosebumps rise on your flesh.Â
âYouâre mad, Y/N. Youâre paranoid, stupid, ungrateful, selfish little bitch, and I canât even be mad at you because I knew this is how youâve been all along and yet, I canât fucking stop myself from falling in love with you every damn day!âÂ
Itâs your turn to go speechless. The documents in your hands fall limply to the floor, as your jaw opens and you stay rooted in one spot, stunned beyond belief. âYou⌠what?â
âYou were so fucking right every time you called me a dumbass, Y/N. Because I am one.â He laughs again, taking off his glasses with one hand, and rubbing his eyes with another. Then he stops laughing and when he wears his glasses again, his face looks twenty years older.Â
âWonwoo⌠Iâm not understanding.â
âYou will never understand. Because you donât have a fucking heart. One would think I have a masochism kink- the way you kick me out every day and I come back to you like a dog. Have you ever thought that maybe I donât want to take over your company? Iâve told you before- I have enough ways and means to bring you down already had I really wanted to. For fucksâ sake, itâd take a minute for me to destroy your reputation by spreading a rumour about how you wanted to bang me just because you thought it was a great way to get your dad to get into treatment.â
âYou still could-â
âIâve never taken advantage of you- never. Iâve respected you, with as much as I could. When youâve been petty, when youâve been oversmart, when youâve been angry. And you think Iâm really interested in destroying you? No, Y/N, if thereâs anything I feel towards you and your professional career, itâs admiration. And respect.â
âDonât lie to my face, Jeon.â
He laughs again, and kneels down so that heâs looking away from you, down at the floor, his body no longer held up in his usual manly stature.Â
âIâm so tired of running around and playing these games with you, Y/N. Iâve admired you since youâd been promoted two classes at once in ninth grade.â
âThat is a lie. Youâd gone right after that class to bitch about me, very loudly, to your friends, about how Iâd been promoted only because my dadâs business was flourishing.âÂ
âIt was a front, because all of my friends, and mind you, I donât mean Mingyu and Seungcheol, had become pissed at you for it. I had to⌠I donât know⌠be popular? I couldnât be any more of a loser than I already was. Iâd lost a year as it is for breaking my leg and not being able to attend classes, and then⌠owning up that your intelligence and intellect amazed me and got me on my fucking knees would mean Iâd no longer be the cool boy in class who everybody wanted to be with.âÂ
You kneel down next to him, imploring him to look into your eyes. But he steadfastly avoids eye contact- and you feel the floor slip away from your feet. Things youâd believed for years⌠hearing them become untrue⌠hearing them being simple misunderstandings⌠it was too frightening and too overwhelming to be believable.Â
âBut thereâs not been a moment these last dozen years when Iâve not had my heart beat fast whenever I think about you⌠see you. Iâd accepted your harsh words and your cold attitude as the norm because⌠I knew it was because Iâd not behaved very nicely with you either, and I was to be blamed for it after all. But I took what I could get. A beggar cannot be a chooser, you know?âÂ
And he finally looks at you.Â
And finally you can read Jeon Wonwoo. Every expression is as clear as day on his face. His eyes clouded with betrayal and pain, his lips twitching, seconds away from breaking down, his hands pale and trembling. You want to walk away, be a coward again, run away and escape to your bubble of yourself and only yourself. But you also want to take his hand, and feel the truth heâs speaking coursing through his veins buzz out into your own skin.
So you do that.Â
For once in twenty six years, you do the brave thing.Â
You sit down completely on the floor, and you lean forward to face him, and touch the tips of his fingers. Youâre surrounded by the flurry of papers youâd brought to him, but in this moment, when the current of his touch matches the voltage running in your mind, you forget what they were. He looks away, and says, âEverything about you was so electrifying. You were the first woman who had never pedestalized me for my money and my position in society. The first woman whoâd made me feel like just another human being. The first woman who Iâd been unable to seduce with just a casual look. The first woman who threw a challenge at me with not just her attitude but also her smartness. And boy, you know how competitive I can be.â
âI was okay with being fuckbuddies too, you know. This way, I didnât have to pine over you from a corner of the room at social gatherings and wonder how you smelt. I didnât have to look at you from the other side of the cafeteria at school and imagine how it would feel to kiss the cream off the corner of your lips. And I fucking loved it. I loved being able to hold you close, make you mine. I- well⌠the first night youâd hooked up with me? If youâd not come back to me yourself, I would have begged you and confessed that very night. I would have cried at your feet to let me be your lover.â
Thereâs a single tear falling off his cheek and onto the point where your fingers touch. He doesnât look at you. The sky outside darkens with the impending rain, making the room infinitely darker than it was earlier.Â
âAnd then⌠when youâd asked me to stop⌠the world had broken down on me. Iâd given up on making you want to like me- but,â and he laughs again, that broken, mirthless laugh, âa man can dream, can he not?â
âWonwoo, Iâm sorry.â you whisper. You know itâs pointless, but you still want to say it.
âFor what Y/N? Youâve done nothing wrong. Youâve just shown me my place.â
âFor hurting you. I didnât knowâŚâ
âNo you⌠you didnât even know you were hurting me. You were just being you.â
âAnd itâs sick that I hurt you so much when I was just being myself.âÂ
Thereâs a long minute of silence, as he looks up at you. Lightning cracks on the horizon outside, your body shivering with the sudden sound of thunder, and his hands withdraw from your own.
âY/N, I donât want to interfere in your life any longer. Iâve lived happily this last year, being so close to you, even when I knew it wasnât in the way I wanted. But last nightâŚâ
âWonwoo. I-â
âIt was a mistake because I canât do this so casually anymore, Y/N. I donât want to wake up next to you just like that, Y/N. I donât want to be married to you on paper, Y/N. I donât want to pretend in front of my friends and not make you mine in public. Seungcheol and Mingyu accepted you fully⌠because they knew just how smitten Iâve been with you forever.â The edge of his lips tilt upward in a lopsided, winsome smile, as he continues, âThat day in the amusement park? Youâd been so mad at me for no fault of mine at all, but youâd been so cute when youâd lolled all over my shoulder and clutched onto my clothes for your dear life. That time youâd made your first speech as your fatherâs heir to the company, I swear I couldâve run to you and kissed you right there, youâd been so hot up on stage, in the spotlight, right where you belong.â
He starts standing up, looking away from you. He begins picking up the first paper next to him.Â
âOh, you bought the divorce papers.âÂ
You spring up to attention at once, and snatch it away from him. âWonwoo, I-â
âNo, thanks for bringing them. Thank you for putting me out of my misery of this awful mirage called hope.â
âNo, please, I-â
âI see youâve already signed-âÂ
âWonwoo! Just please listen to me?â
He finally pauses in his tracks and looks at you. âYouâve said enough, Y/N-ah. Youâll get the divorce you so want. And if you like, Iâll ask Jihoon to put in a word to take away the deal as well. If you feel so threatened-â
âWonwoo, hold up. Jihoon?â
âYeah? You didnât know? His cousin is the CEO of Lee Corp. currently.â
He picks up a pen to sign, and you literally lunge yourself on his body. Itâs cinematic, a little unreal, but you do it out of desperation. It results in you being draped all over his body, as he falls back on his desk. âWhat do you think youâre doing?â
âShut up. Let me talk,â and you clamp a hand on his mouth before he can say another word. You take a deep breath, as his eyes widen for a second, but then he stabilises himself on his desk and waits for you to continue.Â
âIâll admit it, Iâve been an awful person. Iâve been mean, selfish, and paranoid- and yes, while I may have been justified to some extent, I ⌠shouldâve trusted you. Itâs absurd though- had I not trusted you at all, how could I ever submit to you even in sex? How could I trust you with my body at my weakest, most out-of-control moments? Perhaps, deep down, I knew that, no matter how much we sparred with our words and our eyes, we⌠you would never harm me. And I think you know I wouldnât have harmed you either, really. Because youâve been nothing if not my twin spirit. Youâve been the only person competitive enough to challenge me. Youâve been the only man who hasnât given me up even when I threw tantrums. And I want to stop talking in the past tense. Even in the future, I see⌠I see you as the only man whoâd ever really understand me. If I tell you I need a week to just cut off from the world and focus on my work, youâd understand me. If I tell you, Wonwoo, I⌠well fuck it, I didnât even need to tell you that I donât like being lonely every New Yearsâ Eve, did I? You agreed to be my ally when our families turned against us. You agreed to be my husband when I hadnât even asked you about it. Youâve⌠youâve shown me that a world beyond me exists, youâve shown me that Iâm not the only person in this world I can care about, and youâve shown me that you donât need to be loud and obvious when you want to do things for others. And I havenât even shown gratitude for it. So youâre right when you call me a paranoid, stupid, ungrateful, selfish little bitch.â He shakes his head, but you only laugh a little. âNo youâre right. You are. Wonwoo, I⌠these last few weeks. When I was away, with my dad? I didnât think it was love but⌠I did think it was longing. I didnât even know when Iâd gotten used to not living alone at home. I didnât even know when Iâd developed the habit of waiting till 10 pm to see you enter the house after working out, sweaty and your muscles bulging. Iâd told you I had become dependent on you as a way to relieve my stress? Well, turns out now Iâve become dependent on you for attention, for affection, for a way to cure my loneliness. I am a paranoid, stupid, ungrateful, selfish little bitch because Iâve been so lonely for years. Apart from my parents and my sister, I⌠Iâve never had anyone else. And I thought it was a strength of mine ⌠until I grew up and realised just how lonely I had become. And then⌠I found you, I guess? Even when we just had sex, it was better than spending all those nights alone, drinking on my own. Even when youâd tie me up to your bedpost for hours on that stupid yellow vibrator of yours, it was more intimate than anything else, and simply because⌠you even read my face and understood when I was reaching my boundaries. And Iâm having all these epiphanies right now, and I feel like a fool for priding myself on my smartness, because truly, what have I gained if Iâve lost you?â
And then, he wrings his hands free and leans over you, and kisses you. Kisses you with his mouth open, his eyes on yours as he gauges your expressions turn from surprise, to wonder, to thrill. When heâs finally kissed you out of breath, you pull away from him to breathe in and feel alive again, only to find that the roles have switched and heâs got you pinned against his desk now.Â
âBaby, if only⌠if only Iâd known, that your pretty mind was having so many epiphanies, Iâd have not left you on the bed alone in the morning. Tell me you donât really want the divorce, tell me what you said right now was not a joke?â
âItâs not⌠I donât want a divorce, please Wonwoo. I had only got them prepared because I thought youâd want them- butâŚâÂ
âWell, I deserve to be treated like a shithead for not making you feel just how badly I want to hold on to this marriage. Because even if it is fakeâŚâ
âWonwoo, shh⌠itâs not fake if I love you, right?â You say, experimentally, hoping youâre doing the right thing now by being brave, and when he doesnât reply for a second, your brain goes on a spiral again, but then he must know it because he kisses you again. âSay that again, princess.â So you do. He asks you three more times, and each time, he punctuates his sentences with kisses on your face, and you blush harder each time you admit that yes, you have fallen in love with Jeon Wonwoo. The last person youâd expect to fall for⌠but itâs true, and itâs real, and itâs warm and novel with how itâs coursing through your veins.Â
âI love you too, Y/N, if youâll really have me.â So you kiss him back, your tongues lazily sliding against each other, the sensation making you numb. It feels good to kiss Wonwoo, but it feels even better to kiss your lover Wonwoo, you realise, and you go back for a million more kisses, before the grandfatherâs clock in his room rings out and reminds you that it is noon.Â
âWonwoo⌠Fuck! Iâd forgotten,â you whisper as he kisses you down your neck, lavishing every inch of your skin. âThe meeting with the Lees!â âOh.â He looks up at you. âIâll call Jihoon and ask him to reschedule. Canât let work get in the way of pleasure, right now, Mrs. Jeon. Not when I can finally make love to you like youâre mine.â You giggle at his words, unimaginably corny. But you canât deny how good it makes you feel. âWait, who said Iâm yours?â âFuck, donât mess with me, woman. You- you just said!â âI am, relax! Itâs a joke, Mr. Jeon. I see your cheesiness has changed now⌠but your sense of humour is just as poor as before.â He snarls against your lips, although itâs sexy in a way. âIâll not let you go for comments like that, you know?â
_
So he doesnât. He calls Jihoon and reschedules the meeting, and then he drives you home, in his car. Heâs sitting in the driverâs seat, his hand wrapped in yours, as he pauses at every red light to kiss you. âI still can't believe it.â âYouâve got me here, Jeon. Iâm not going away.â You can see the way his hands tremble, but you hold on tight. Youâre telling him as much as youâre telling yourself, youâre never going away.Â
Itâs still raining outside, but he covers your head with his blazer as he picks you up and carries you all the way upstairs to his apartment, doesnât even lower you in the elevator. Thankfully thereâs only an ahjumma inside the elevator, who doesnât seem to mind, only giggles when you apologise. âItâs okay. I know how lovesick men can be,â she says, before she gets down at her designated floor.Â
And then he doesnât stop kissing you. He doesnât leave your mouth even when the elevator door opens and you both walk out into your apartment. He doesnât leave your mouth when you shrug off your heels and he takes off his own shoes. He doesnât leave your mouth when he directly takes you all the way to the master bedroom, and just plops you down on the bed, you nearly springing up with the impact.Â
âWonwoo?â You ask when he turns away and walks into the closet, only to return with a box thatâs too familiar to you. It has all your toys in it. âDo you know, Mrs. Jeon, just how cruel youâve been by forcing me to see these every time I open the drawer to take out my underwear? He opens it slowly, showing you the three dildos inside, and the bullet vibrator Wonwoo himself had bought for you. âEvery time I see them, it feels like youâre cheating on me, because fuck, how can anything give you pleasure when I literally exist?â His words are cheesy again, but in that dirty way which is so on brand for him. Youâre leaking under the suit pants already, you know that.Â
âWonwoo⌠I⌠you know I donât use them when youâre around.â
âAnd you shouldnât have to use them ever. Not when Iâm here to fuck you good like you deserve, like the cumslut you are, hmm?â He presses a finger under your chin, taking in a good look at you from above, before he orders, âStrip.â
So you do. He takes his sweet time watching you strip, while taking out one dildo from your box and his favourite ties. When youâre down to your underwear, he pauses you and extends a hand waiting for something. You know whatâs coming, so you just extend your hands to him and let him tie you up. He smirks at your gesture, so he ties you up the poles of the bed. He also uses another tie to wrap around your eyes, and then he gently peels off your panties. âGod, fuck. You smell heavenly.â Did he just sniff your underwear? âWonwoo! Donât!â Thereâs a sharp spank on your pussy, exposed to him in its wet glory, and you crumble instantly. âLittle baby girls donât tell Sir what to do and what not to do, hmm? They just take it as theyâre given.â So he spanks you again, and it sends shivers through your body. Just the thought of fucking in the broad daylight seems like a sin, but then⌠isnât this what married couples do?
You realise that Wonwooâs seated himself next to you, and heâs gently taken your head into his lap. His hand is already playing with your clit, and you feel something cold and liquidy being rubbed over your pussy flesh. Lube? Heâs still fully dressed, and you can feel the cold metal of his watch graze against your sensitive thigh, making you hiss in pleasure.Â
âItâs been far too long since youâve been taught a lesson, darling. Seems like getting married has made you feel like youâre beyond Sirâs control. But thatâs not how it goes, is it?â You whisper out, âNo⌠No Sir.â âGood girl. If you want to be treated like youâre married, then youâve gotta earn it, yes? Now. Can you take one finger?â He inserts his finger gently, which is coated in the cold substance youâre assuming is lube. It isnât really necessary, given how wet you are already, but it feels hotter when the lube is so cold inside you.Â
You nod. âWords.â âYes, I can.â So he slowly pumps it in, before saying, âCan you take two fingers?â You whimper as he stretches you by putting in two fingers. âYes Sir.â âThatâs a good girl.â The praise is making your head spin.
âAnd can you take-â he puts in another damn finger, âthree fingers?â Now itâs a real burn. Itâs in till his knuckles all too quickly but you canât say no because you want to please. âQuick, princess. Donât keep me waiting. Yes or n-â âYes! I can. I will. Iâm a good girl, Sir?â He pumps all three fingers deep until it hits your spot, and you scream out his name. âSuch a good girl. Now fuck yourself on those fingers thinking thatâs Sirâs cock.âÂ
You push up your hips, and he thrusts in, meeting your halfway. And then he sets the pace, as he fucks into you relentlessly, his other hand gently wrapping around your jaw and you take out your tongue, almost drooling, until he puts a finger inside your mouth too. You just know heâs smirking right now, with you being desperate for something in your mouth too, but you canât care less.Â
Your orgasm hits you as soon as he orders gently, âCum for me, pretty baby.â But when you come down from your high, he doesnât take his fingers out. He gently pumps in your cum into your system again, and you writhe with sensitivity. But he uses his other hand to stop you, as he takes it out of your mouth. âNow, can you take a dildo along with these fingers?â You gasp, because itâs not imaginable. âNo, I⌠itâs too much, Sir.â âIs it? I donât think itâs bigger than your husbandâs dick, is it?â And fuck, you canât stop yourself from clenching at that. Itâs crazy how hot he makes it sound, but it feels amazing when he calls himself your husband. And he must feel your cunt clenching around his fingers as well, because he whispers near your ear, âOh Mrs Jeon likes that, huh? Too bad she canât take her husbandâs cock then, because itâs too much-â âNo I can take it! I can- I can fit in my husbandâs cock.â You can hear the way Wonwoo grunts, as he plunges his fingers deeper into your cunt. âBut first, Iâve got to train you, yes? Youâve become too unruly. You want to be the perfect wife, donât you?â âFuck!â you canât form words as you clench around his fingers hopelessly, overstimulation forgotten, and buck up your hips to help him reach your spot. He just laughs and begins fucking you again, all three of his thick fingers snugly fit inside you till the knuckles.Â
âCan you feel my wedding ring inside, baby?â He whispers again, and you cry out his name continuously as he drives you to a new high, so familiar, and yet so new. Heâs your husband now, fuck. Itâs a revelation that hits harder in the middle of sex, and you come instantly, coating his fingers with your essence.Â
âOh, my cockslutâs eager to please her husband, is she? So eager to be the perfect wife, is she?âÂ
âYes, yes! Please- pl- I just want-â
âWant?â
âPlease fuck me Wonwoo!â
He immediately removes his fingers from your pussy and you scream out as you feel empty. âAaah! Please!âÂ
âIâm not making any girl whoâs forgotten rules in the bedroom, feel good.â He takes off the tie that was wrapped around your eyes, and you notice that heâs not leaning down at you, his glasses still on, but his eyes dark with hunger. God, heâs hot.
âIâm sorry Sir.â
Thereâs a sharp spank to your clit, and you jump. Itâs too much, but in the best way possible.Â
âIâll ask you again. Can you take three fingers and one of those dildos you love so much that you torture your husband with its sight every day?â He doesnât break eye contact, and you whimper in front of him, pathetic and desperate.Â
âYes, Sir. I can.â
âOpen your mouth.âÂ
Wordlessly, you do, and he spits into your mouth. Then he puts in the dildo. As you see the purple dildo, which is considerably slimmer than Wonwooâs dick, but about the same length, enter your pussy, you notice how much Wonwooâs gaze has hardened. Is he really jealous of that damn toy? Itâs funny, so you buck your hips up to meet the way heâs slowly fucking you with the plastic dildo, and his eyes become more dangerous.Â
âAre you that desperate for it, darling?â
âI want to feel full, Sir.âÂ
And then something in Wonwoo snaps. He wraps three fingers around the head of the dildo and along with the fingers, he plunges the dildo into you, stretching you out much more than before. The burn eases out after a second, but he fucks you at an incredibly slow pace, which only makes you eager for more. âFaster, please!â âYou want me to fuck you with this plastic toy how I fuck you with my cock?â âYes! I d- I do! I just want to feel full!â Then his other hand finds its way to your tits and twists a nipple hard enough to make it painful. âYouâre such a whore, Y/N. Just a pretty whore. Youâd take any cock just to keep your holes filled?â âNo! I ⌠I only like it when Sir does it for me.â âLiar. Just now youâre so happy to take this dildo, huh?â You canât even think straight with the pace heâs torturing you at, but you do reply, âThatâs- aah! Only- only because Sirâs fucking me with it. Because I can feel your wedding ring inside me, Sir!âÂ
âFuck!â Thereâs another sharp pinch at your nipple before Wonwoo begins fucking you faster, and it only takes you a minute before heâs bringing you to yet another high which leaves you dizzy.Â
âGod, youâre left speechless. Does Mr Jeon fuck you that good?â He leans it to kiss you, his wet fingers now wrapped around your breasts. You can feel the way your cum still sticks on his fingers, but it feels too good to be gross. You kiss him back, arching your back off the bed, until he pulls away.Â
He stands up from the bed, and languidly takes off his clothes. âSo pretty like this, princess. Legs all spread out for who?â
âYou, Wonwoo. My husband.âÂ
He stops his movements and stares at you for a second. It seems like calling him husband has the same effect on him as the effect on you when he calls you wife. âYes, youâre right. Your husband.â He sits next to you to kiss you again and this time, you try to sit upright, in spite of your hands still being tied. When he breaks off, he says, âSo let me train you to be my wife, hmm? I want to fuck you so good that your pussy shapes itself around me. That you wonât even need prep when I want to fuck you because itâll be so used to me.â Oh, no wonder for that size training. âWhy? Does your cock get bigger now that youâre my husband?â He smirks, eyes cruel because youâre talking back to him. âNo, because I need to fit in perfectly to ensure none of my seed leaves you when Iâm breeding you.â And then he attacks your neck, and youâre moaning even before his lips hit skin because his words flip some switches in you that youâve never even known. Sure, Wonwooâs always fucked you raw because youâve been on pills for years, but the idea of him breeding a child into you? Fuck. Youâd never even thought about having a child, but this idea turns you on remarkably insanely.Â
Soon his shirt is off and he unties your hands. âTake off my pants for me, baby.â And you do. You tease him a bit, but thatâs only fair with how hard heâs sucking your breasts, as if heâs born to do this. Before taking off his boxers, you notice the precum thatâs leaking out so much that itâs made the fabric quite wet. So you lick his dick clean while itâs still inside his boxers, and youâve got him hissing and grunting like never before. âFuck, Y/N, donât,â he pulls your head away. âWhy?â He must notice the way his precum is still sticking on your lips, because he groans again. âI want to cum inside you. Breed you full, baby.â That puts a shy smile on your face as he takes off his underwear, and you finally see his cock upright, leaking and bright red. And perhaps youâre delusional after all those orgasms, but it does seem bigger than before.Â
âPlease, Mr Jeon, take me.â And he responds to your begging. He kisses you softly, as he lines himself up with you, his left hand still pulling your hands up above your head, and your right hand clutching your hips in an iron grip that will leave marks. And then he just enters, without warning, till the hilt, and you both moan out at the sensation. You donât know why it feels different, but with how heâs kissing you, almost softly and gently, like heâs a gentleman, while fucking you ruthlessly like heâs in rut, youâre in heaven for sure.Â
Itâs also the first time Wonwoo is so audible during sex. Heâs panting and moaning, although much softer than you, but his sounds spur you on even harder. He canât stop whispering your name and other pet names in your ears, while you keep moaning his name loud even to burst his eardrums. He doesnât care. He responds to every word you utter, every little request you beg, and he fucks you fast and hard, until he canât hold on any further and his entire body is trembling with the incoming orgasm. âMrs Jeon, can you cum with me?â âYes, please, Sir.â And so you do, releasing into each other while still making out with each other. It feels like youâve entered a different dimension of pleasure, and Wonwoo is here with you. Itâs a safe feeling beyond description, and you pass out right there.
_
When you do wake up, you find Wonwoo sitting next to you with a cloth in his hands, wiping gently at your legs.Â
âHow long have I been out?âÂ
âAbout ten minutes?â
He doesnât answer smoothly. You can see the way his hands move softly, almost worshipping.Â
âI love you, Wonwoo.â
Then he looks up at you, and you see the way his eyes are quivering.Â
âHey, whatâs wrong?â âNothing.â âNo, tell me.â âNothing just-â You sit up, and take his hands in your own. Then you nod at him, gently urging him on.Â
âWas it too much?â
âHuh?â
âDid I push you too much?â
âNo. I wouldâve used my safeword if you did.â
âBut what if you forgot the safeword in the middle of it all- what if you got too pushed by me-â
âI wasnât, and thatâs what matters. I remember it all the time, Wonwoo, you⌠the traffic lights arenât really easy to forget. I would tap out somehow if I felt like too much. But it wasnât, so whereâs this coming from?â
âNothing⌠I⌠I hope youâre not just taking it from me because Iâm your husband now.â
And at that, you laugh. âHell, nah, Wonwoo. You know I wouldnât take it from you even if you were god. Youâve really got me all wrong, then.â
He smiles weakly, and you know itâs still on his mind. So you move over to sit gently on his lap. âWonwoo, when I said earlier that you know my limits. I wasnât lying, you know. You do. You donât push me too much.â
âBut if I ever do-â
âIf you ever do, you should know that Iâll tap out at once and never forgive you. You always make me feel safe, Wonwoo.â And you hug him, and the fact that youâre both naked makes your hug even warmer and softer as you feel Wonwooâs hands wrap around your back as well.Â
âI love you too, Y/N. I promise Iâll always keep you safe.â And then he kisses your forehead, and you snuggle your face right into the crook of his neck. He smells⌠like Wonwoo, and it feels like home.Â
âNow, how about some lunch, baby?â
âYouâre hungry when I had to do all the work?â You gasp while still tucked into his neck, and he giggles with the way your breath tickles his neck.Â
âSo what does my pretty wife want?â
âShe just wants to cuddle you and sleep.âÂ
âAnd my wifeâs wishes are my commands.â
So he lays down, with you still on top of him like a koala, and pulls the blankets over you both, wrapping you into one tiny ball. You look at him with a fond smile, and you see your expression mirrored in his. âI love you so much, Y/N-ah.â
âAnd I love you, Wonwoo. I could love nobody else apart from you.â
#wonwoo#jeon wonwoo#svt#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#seventeen x you#svt x reader#svt smut#wonwoo smut#wonwoo x reader#seventeen wonwoo#seventeen fanfic#nobody else wonwoo#seventeen jeon wonwoo#seventeen fic#wonwoo imagines#wonwoo enemies to lovers#svt enemies to lovers#wonwoo scenarios#simpxxstan#chaebol wonwoo#wonwoo svt
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The Artificer: Part I - Azriel x Reader
Warnings: None
â¨Based on this ask â¨
Masterlist of Masterlists
"Azriel flipped through the information in his mind like a picture book: She specializes in crafting fae-bonded weapons using autoimmune magic. Brilliant, capable, and loyal - only a fool would underestimate her."
The air burned with unknown magic, mingled with the heady smell of smoke and metal and something else⌠something sweet and clean. Azriel couldnât put his finger on it as he followed behind his brothers, weaving through the packed, but homey workshop.Â
Bookshelves filled with carefully attended tomes on woodworking, metallurgy, glassblowing, and more lined one of the walls, some faint traces of magic keeping them safe from the dust and soot that tended to accumulate in the corners.Â
The other wall was decorated with an assortment of keys - brass, gold, silver, steel, even glass twinkled in the faelight, like a hundred pairs of eyes winking. When Cassian reached for one, the metal began to glow and spark, spitting out thin bursts of magic that smarted until the Illyrian had the sense to pull away. Â
When Helion first offered your weapon-smithing services to Rhys, he had sung your praises so loudly that Nyx had awoken from his nap, whining incessantly for his father to rock him back to sleep.
Originally born to noble parents in the Dawn Court. She moved to Day thirty years before Amaranthaâs rule to escape an ill-suited marriage and has been quietly designing weapons for Helion ever since. She specializes in crafting fae-bonded weapons using autoimmune magic. Brilliant, capable, and loyal - only a fool would underestimate her.
Azriel flipped through the information in his mind like a picture book, cycling through the lines Helion had spoken and his own independent research. He could recite your birthday, the names of your parents, your grandparents, your older brother whoâd been killed in the war against Hybern, and the day you graduated university. He even knew the planned date of your wedding to some pompous Lordling from Summer.Â
What he didnât know was what you looked like, and he wasnât sure what to expect.Â
Perhaps heâd expected someone more refined and regal - you were of noble blood after all⌠but then they rounded the corner and your soot-stained face popped out from beneath the workbench, purple lens goggles magnifying your eyes to vibrant proportions.Â
You flipped the goggles up, resting them on your head like a crown.
Azriel blinked.Â
Strands of hair curled around your fire-blown eyes, framed by soft skin that had been spared the worst of the soot by your goggles. You looked like you had stepped out of a flame - strong and resilient as steel.
You were absolutely breathtaking.
âOh shit.â You quietly cursed, bouncing to your feet.Â
You chucked the gloves to the side, hastily wiping away at your cheeks before dipping into a perfect curtsy. You were an actress caught in the spotlights after an ill-timed curtain opening, and you needed to make up for the poor first impression. You hastily slapped on the costume of the High Born Lady, feeling every etiquette lesson your mother had hammered into you slide over your limbs until you were a puppet on strings.Â
âMy apologies, my Lords. I lost track of time.â The words rolled out automatically, perfectly timed and perfectly pleasant, âForgive me.â
Azriel frowned. He didnât like the change that had just taken place.Â
You held one hand artfully over your chest, the other flowing out to the side as you remained frozen in your bow. His eyes traced over the curve of your neck, catching on the sliver of skin that peeked out from beneath your work shirt, then down the slope of your sturdy shoulders and arms - strong and limber after decades of hammering away at glass and steel.Â
The High Lord of the Night Court waved off the comment, a charming smile brightening his face as he hoisted you out of your curtsy. If he cared about getting soot on his fine clothes, he didnât show it.
âThereâs no need for any apologies. Itâs a pleasure to meet you Y/n. Helionâs told me much about you.â Â
You blushed, subtly brushing back the hair that stuck to your forehead and wishing youâd taken the time to clean yourself up⌠maybe wash your face properly and change into cleaner clothes.
âMy brothers-â The High Lord swung his arm out in a slash of Night Court velvet, âCassian and Azriel.âÂ
You had to keep yourself from sighing. They were all terribly attractive. It almost wasnât fair.
âThe pleasure is all mine, High Lord,â You curtsied again, âAnd Lords.â You appended gracefully.
The High Lord was as sensual and charismatic as everyone said with his twinkling violet eyes and perfect smirk - the kind of smirk that announced to the world that he was very aware of the effect he had on males and females alike.Â
Your eyes flickered down to the tailored velvet suit. It clung to his body impeccably, carving out his broad shoulders and trim waist. How he wasnât stifling in the heat was beyond you. The furnace roared a little louder, as if to push the point.Â
The Lord of Bloodshed - Cassian as he was called - possessed a wilder beauty. He was all hard-cut lines and cords of muscle with a faint brush of stubble along his jaw that suited him well.Â
But the Shadowsinger. He was the one you had trouble dragging your eyes away from. There was something heartbreakingly solemn about him, like a hero plucked out of a fairytale bound to end in tragedy. The same boyish joy that touched his brothers seemed to have skipped over him, and you couldnât help but wonder why. In fact he seemed⌠displeased, and your heart began to beat a little faster.
âCall me Rhys.â The High Lord winked, drawing your attention away from the dark and silent Shadowsinger, âAny friend of Helionâs is a friend of mine, and I like my friends to call me Rhys. It keeps me humble.âÂ
Cassian snorted, âSure it does.âÂ
He shoved past his brother, settling into a comically wide stance. You tried to disguise your surprise and confusion when he leaned down further to be eye level with you. His eyes twinkled with mischief, as if heâd caught onto the slip in your perfectly tailored costume and he wanted to rip it off and burn it to the ground.
âThe nameâs Cassian,â He held out his hand for you to shake, âOr Cass,â He tilted his head to the side, deep in thought, âOr Bastard brute, as my wife so lovingly calls me.âÂ
You snorted, then froze in horror, one hand flying up to slap over your mouth. âIâm sorry, I shouldnât have-âÂ
Cassian tipped his head back and roared with laughter. It was the kind of sound powerful enough to fill a tavern and made you feel as giddy as three glasses of wine.
Azriel tamped down the jealousy that flared to life in his chest upon seeing that Cassian was the first to make you laugh. Not that he would have been able to make you laugh as easily as breathing⌠but he could dream.Â
Your eyes were blown wide, confusion racking your body as every etiquette lesson crumbled into a pile of dust. Your mother had warned you of what to do with males that were too forward, too cold, too dramatic, too charming. But Cassian was a different breed entirely - he was too casual, too friendly and normal. It took you aback.
Rhys rolled his eyes. Leave it to Cassian to make a High Born Lady crack as easily as fresh ice on the Sidra.Â
Cassian tapped his chest, looking quite satisfied with himself, âThereâs no need for bowing or Court pleasantries. Rhysandâs the only one of us with any real house training anyhow. Prissy little Lordling.âÂ
âHey.â
âYou know itâs true, Rhys. Youâre wearing fucking velvet.âÂ
Rhys snorted, âDonât attack me because I have some sense of style.â
You swiveled between the two of them, uncertain of how to continue. âWell I-â You stammered, taking a step back and straightening your shoulders.Â
Your motherâs words rang through your mind: Donât slouch.Â
âApologies, for my⌠manners.â You finished lamely.Â
âGood manners are wasted on Cassian,â Azriel said. Gods, even his voice was tragically beautiful, like the sound of rain drumming against a window, or the crisp call of wind when Autumn sighs its last breath and gives way to Winter. âAnd Rhysand too, actually.â He added, ignoring the sounds of protest from Rhys and Cassian.Â
His heartbeat picked up when your eyes fell on him completely.
âAre they wasted on you?â If they were going to act so⌠uncouth, perhaps that gave you a pass, âOr did I suffer through endless hours preparing for my debutante ball for nothing?âÂ
Azriel tilted his head. He tried to imagine you as a debutante, paraded around to various suitors in a puffy dress like the gods-awful one Feyre had been shoved into for her first wedding, and it left a sour taste in his mouth. But when he tried imagining you in Night Court attire - something blue - he couldnât help but find that he quite liked the scene heâd conjured up for himself. He smiled - a faint and quiet smile that made your heart go still.
Cassian and Rhys gaped when their brother quietly closed the distance between you two and bowed. He was the picture of grace - deadly, beautiful grace.
Azriel took your hand in his, reveling in the feeling of your calloused fingertips against his scarred palm, and gently brushed his lips against your skin.Â
âNo.â He murmured, casting his eyes up at you. You melted, falling into the molten sea of his hazel eyes, and it wasnât because of the heat, âGood manners are not wasted on me.â He finished, straightening up and taking a step back. Â
He didnât look disappointed anymore. If anything he looked⌠amused and⌠at ease.Â
You tried to imagine him smiling - a true smile full of teeth and unburdened joy - and found you quite liked the image youâd crafted for yourself.
You tilted your head to the side, trying to disguise just how much heâd affected you. One kiss and a look and you were a goner. How silly of you.Â
âThat was quite good. Iâll give you that.âÂ
Azriel tipped his head in a subtle bow, âThank you, My Lady.âÂ
You scoffed. No one had called you by any proper title in centuries.Â
âShall we begin with you, High Lord?â You asked him first out of propriety, missing the faint frown on Azrielâs face.Â
He knew he shouldnât take anything personally. This was a business meeting first and foremost, but that didnât stop the flicker of jealousy from budding in his stomach whenever you laughed at Rhysandâs teasing or whenever he leaned just a little too close to look at the sketches you drew. The only moment of satisfaction he felt was when you slapped Rhysandâs hand away from the wall, choosing to pull the samples from the chestnut shelves yourself before taking notes on the styles he preferred.Â
Are you ok? Rhysand asked, raising his eyebrows. It was Cassianâs turn now and The Lord of Bloodshed sat beside you, carefully watching your hand drawn sketches come to life.
Iâm fine.
You donât look fine, brother. Rhys said with a smirk, You look like you want to murder Cass.Â
Azriel wiped the faintest hints of emotion from his face, turning away from Rhys to look around the workroom.Â
Everything was warm and coated in soft orange light from the raging forge. It felt like the moment before the sun sinks into the horizon, when the world is as syrupy and comforting as caramel. Chestnut bookshelves lined the wall, filled with as many trinkets, plates of armour, and weapons as books. A long workbench ran the length of the room, neat stacks of paper punctuated by gleaming blades of obsidian, moonstone, and steel. It was where you currently sat, outlined by the fire like some angel sent down from the heavens.
Azrielâs eyes stuck on one blade in particular, carefully laid out on a bolt of midnight blue velvet. Its bronze handle gave away to gold threaded steel sharp enough to cut light and shadow. The sheets had been folded over and hammered so many times that thin rivers of radiance twisted and turned down the blade, mirroring the runes that had been painstakingly etched along its spine.
âLord Azriel?â His head snapped to the side, following your lyrical voice. Youâd soundlessly made your way around the table without him noticing and now stood at his side, âDo you like anything you see?âÂ
Azriel froze. From this close up he could see the faintest gold flecks in your eyes, as though a forge was burning there too, some piece of you always hammering away at an anvil⌠but maybe that was just the hammering of his heart.
Cassian coughed. Loudly. Rhysand smirked, elbowing his brother, but Cassian was successful. Whatever spell had come over the Shadowsinger broke and color dusted his cheeks.
âItâs just Azriel - or Az. Either works.â He was technically a Lord⌠emphasis on technically. âCould you tell me about this one?â He pointed to the brilliant blade, hating the sight of his ruined hand so close to it.Â
You picked it up with ease, spinning it around your body with a strong grace that made Azrielâs breath catch. You werenât the most skilled swordsman by any means, but you knew enough. After all, if you were going to spend your life making swords youâd be damned if you couldnât wield one properly.
âThis one,â You said with a smile full of pride, âIs Sunseeker.â The blade began to glow, content to once again be in the hands of its master, âIt took me decades to figure out how to bind weapons to one master, but once I did - well - I thought if anyone should have that kind of weapon first it should be me.âÂ
To your surprise, a faint smile graced Azrielâs lips. It was such a minor display, but it brightened the air around him. Even his shadows began to emerge, wrapping around his arms and inching towards you like a moth to a flame.
Sunseeker truly was a work of art, beautiful and deadly in equal measure.Â
Cass whistled low, coming closer to admire it. âHow does weapon binding work?â He asked curiously.Â
Your eyes lit up mischievously, âWould you like me to demonstrate?âÂ
Cassian had just enough time to say âyesâ and stretch out his hands before you handed him the blade and he dropped like a stone.Â
âCAULDRON FUCK ME!âÂ
Rhysand sputtered, doubling over in laughter. Azriel snorted, a hand flying up to cover his mouth in surprise. They watched Cassian fall to his knees on the floor, grasping the handle of the blade that felt two thousand pounds heavier in his hands.Â
You looked rather pleased with yourself.Â
Cassian growled, bracing his feet on the floor and pulling up so hard Azriel could see the veins pop out of his neck. âFucking hell.â He said through gritted teeth.
âCome on, Cass. Get up.â Rhysand teased, shoving his brother with the toe of his boot.
Cassian kicked him in the knee, but from his position the blow didnât land properly, âI would if I could, you son of a b-â
âDonât talk about my mother like that.â
âFuck you.âÂ
âJust. Get. Up.âÂ
âI. Canât. You piece of shit. I canât let go of this gods-damned sword.âÂ
Azriel shifted closer to you, heavily amused as Rhys leaned down and grabbed hold of the hilt. His signature charming smile slid off his face.
âWhat the fuck-â He pulled once. Twice. Tried to pry his fingers off the hilt, but he couldnât let go no matter how hard he tried. It was as though heâd been glued to a boulder.
Cassian smirked, âI told you.âÂ
You smiled up at the Shadowsinger as the pair continued to bicker, stretching up on your toes to whisper in his ear, âHardly anyone knows about what I do so I have my fun when I can.âÂ
He fought not to shiver, feeling your breath curl around him as intimately as his shadows. Azriel chuckled - a low rumble in his chest that reverberated through your bones.Â
âAnd how many have fallen victim to your tricks?â He asked. His voice was as smooth as butter and honey to your ears. âJust three. Your brothers and Helion.âÂ
âHelion?â
You nodded.
âI would have paid good money to see that.â
You grinned, leaning closer to him. Without a second thought, Azriel leaned in as well, as if he were a light-starved flower and you were the sun.
âSunseeker is bound to me - tied to my magical signature and my blood. To me, sheâs as light as a feather. To anyone else, she may as well be a mountain.âÂ
âAnd why canât they let go?âÂ
âItâs another trick. If anyone tries to go for my weapon, theyâll be brought down to the ground and Iâll have enough time to kill them first.â You cleared your throat, âNot that Iâm a naturally violent person but⌠well it doesnât hurt to be smart about it.âÂ
âI would agree with you.â Az smiled once again, âIncredible.â He whispered, looking you in the eye, âYouâre incredible.âÂ
You shifted on your feet, clasping your hands behind your back and looking away so he wouldnât see how much his praise affected you.
âIf you two are done flirting with one another, can you please help us?â Cassian grumbled. Rhys and Cass had both given up, opting to sit cross legged on the floor like a pair of scolded children.
You hurried over, muttering sheepish apologies. Youâd overstepped and you knew it but⌠well they just seemed so casual with one another and with you that youâd forgotten they were highly powerful fae first, and your clients second.
The spell broke the moment you touched the sword, Cass and Rhys groaning in relief and jumping to their feet. You polished off the sword and placed it back on the table.Â
âTa da.â You wiggled your fingers. Cass huffed and Rhys cleaned off his clothes with a sweep of his hand.Â
Az leaned down and spoke in your ear, hazel eyes glowing, âI think itâs my turn now.âÂ
You shivered, feeling both small and powerful under the weight of his gaze. Azriel decided to forgo the chair, choosing instead to kneel beside you. One arm rested on the back of your seat, hovering dangerously close to your shoulder blades as you repeated the same questions youâd asked Cassian and Rhys.
You jotted down notes diligently and Azriel took the time to admire your neat and simple handwriting. Your hand stilled over the paper as a tendril of darkness curled around your fingers. Azriel sat so close that your head swam with his scent. He smelled like winter mountains after rainfall - crisp and clean like a breath of fresh air. His shadows had similarly begun to wrap around you like an Autumn breeze, slipping through your hair and around your neck like they wanted to feel the pulse of your beating heart.Â
Azriel swore under his breath, pulling them back as quickly as he could, âIâm sorry. I didnât mean to-âÂ
âI like them.â You said quietly, registering the shock in Azrielâs hazel eyes. You quickly went back to your sketch, âThey remind me of home.âÂ
As a final step you took their measurements - the length of their arm, shoulder width, the distance between their hips and knees. Measuring Cassian and Rhysand went without incident, although they did poke fun when you pulled out a stepladder.
âItâs not my fault youâre all so ridiculously tall,â You grumbled, stretching out the tape across Azrielâs shoulders, âDid your mother fuck a tree?âÂ
The Illyrian snorted, âI wish.â He flinched once the words left his mouth, his smile twisting into a grimace.
âHmmm?â You hummed curiously. Azriel felt your breath brush against the nape of his neck and shivered.Â
âA tree might have treated her better than myâŚâ Azriel trailed off.Â
Youâd been too young to attend Court when you still lived with your parents in Dawn. But even so, whispers of the Night Court were always followed by discussions of Amaranthaâs whore and the Illyrian bastards.
His wings drooped and from the corner of your eye you saw Cassianâs gaze fall to the ground. Even Rhys bristled, the charisma sliding off his skin and replaced by something colder.
He loved his brothers more than himself, and the lack of a blood connection had never minimized the fact that they were his family - his legitimate family. He liked you, but one wrong word about his brothers and he would take his business elsewhere, no matter how talented you might be.
Azriel dared to glance at you, wondering if some part of you believed in the truth - that they were bastards unworthy of attention and respect in the eyes of true high fae nobles, or anyone for that matter. Even in your mussed up clothes you were radiant, carrying yourself with a confidence and grace that came from birth as much as it came from upbringing.Â
You were royalty⌠and Azriel suddenly didnât seem worthy of your attention, even though he was craving it right now.
Your lips tightened into a flat line, anger flaring up in your deep eyes, but you swallowed that anger and channeled the energy into making the brothers laugh once again, âWell Iâll go down on a limb and tell you trees are fantastic lovers.â You said, followed by a cheeky wink.Â
Cassian turned to look at you, absolutely dumbfounded. Rhys was similarly shocked, violet eyes twinkling and mouth twisting into a smile. But it was Azriel who broke the silence first, tipping his head back and laughing so hard that his shoulders shook from the effort. The sound rang through the workshop, like the sound of rain falling. Cassian and Rhysand joined soon after, clutching their stomachs and leaning against chairs and tables for support.Â
You bowed dramatically, arms sweeping to the sides like a tropical bird, âThank you, thank you. Iâll be here all evening.âÂ
And Azriel took that very seriously. After the sketches were finalized and the blood samples were collected to be bound to metal, Azriel hung close to you, quietly begging Rhys with his eyes to stay longer. They wouldnât be back for another six months after this.Â
Rhysand raised his eyebrow knowingly at Cassian and The Lord of Bloodshed smirked.Â
âY/n,â Rhys said, voice dripping with persuasion, âAre you hungry? Perhaps youâd like to join my family for dinner?âÂ
You blushed at the invitation, âThat is very kind of you, but I think Iâll stay here and work on these further.â You shook the papers in your hand, âI donât want to forget anything.â
âAt least let us bring you food then,â Cassian jumped in quickly, âAz! Why donât you keep our favorite artificer company until we come back.â
Azriel blanched, stiffening up like a board. He could admire you in the company of his brothers when you were distracted, but he would be hopeless if left alone. âCass, I donât think-â
âOh, I donât want to take up-â You stammered.
âWhat a wonderful idea,â Rhys clapped Cassian on the back, all but shoving him back the way theyâd originally came, âWeâll be back soon!âÂ
The door hissed closed behind them and you blushed, daring to glance over at the Shadowsinger. At least he also looked flustered. You could find comfort and hope in that.Â
âI guess itâs just us now.â You murmured.Â
His eyes softened, taking in your figure, âI guess so.âÂ
You spent hours talking with him that night, both of you leaning over the tables as you discussed your work and what your life in Dawn had been like. Your parentsâ marriage had been arranged in haste after a drunken one-sight stand resulted in your brotherâs conception. There was little love to begin with, but after his still-birth, whatever affection had existed between them vanished into thin air. Youâd been born seventy-three years later - a true born noble in name only. Your parents never hated you, although sometimes you wished they did. Their indifference was a unique pain that youâd never been able to shake off.
But Azriel⌠Azriel was anything but indifferent. He hung onto every word like it was liquid gold dripping from your lips, and you did the same. Clutching what he said like pearls and committing them to memory.Â
You couldnât hide your disappointment when Cassian and Rhys finally reappeared four hours later. âOh.â You whispered, pulling your hands away from where they brushed against his on the table.Â
âApologies, it took so long.â Rhys grinned.Â
He didnât look sorry at all. In fact, he looked very pleased to see you and Az pressed together, sharing the same seat despite the empty chairs scattered about the room.
Azriel was less pleased and Rhys didnât miss the faint frown on his brotherâs lips as you begrudgingly reclaimed a seat of your own, nestled between Azriel and Cassian. He also didnât miss when one of Azrielâs shadows curled around the leg of your chair and tugged you closer to him.Â
You listened to the brothers talk. Rhys and Cassian carried the weight of the conversation, as they usually did, bickering over lunch leftovers and proudly discussing the progress their mates were making with their respective projects - Feyre with her art studio and Nesta with her Valkyries. Azrielâs shadows shrank away, a glint in his eye dimming when the subject came up.Â
You stole a glance, watching him carefully. When he caught you staring you smiled and some of that glimmer came back.Â
âCan I see you again?â Azriel asked quietly once youâd finished eating. Rhys had already cleaned up the food scraps with a snap of his fingers and now lingered by the door, speaking with Cassian.
You looked puzzled, âWonât you be here when the swords are ready? It shouldnât take longer than six months. Maybe less. And I can still make adjustments then, if you donât find it to your liking.â
Azriel shook his head, smiling softly, âNo I meant before that.â He glanced at his brothers - his lovingly overbearing, nosy, matchmaking brothers, âJust us again.âÂ
Your heart skipped a beat, tempo quickening after the momentary stillness. âOh.â You breathed, âI would like that. I would like that very much.âÂ
âGood.â Azriel took your hands in his, feeling the rough calluses of your palm against his scarred skin. He pressed a kiss to both hands, then looked at you, âUntil next time then.âÂ
Azriel could never regret meeting you that day, nor could he completely regret seeing you the next week⌠and the week after that⌠and the week after that. He burrowed underground with you, sought after the warmth of your home and of your heart like a moth to a flame, daring to brush closer and closer with every beat of his wings.Â
But it had been a mistake to visit you so often, and so brazenly. Here, in the safety of your workshop, he forgot there were fires that were not so nurturing and lovely. And he forgot that there were others who sought your power and not just your company.
Next Chapter ->
#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#acotar fanfiction#acotar#fluff#meet cute#azriel x you#azriel x y/n#rhysand#cassian#azriel#the artificer
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GrievingSukuna! HEADCANONS
Summary: You passed away from an incurable illness that plagued you almost your entire life, and even as his favorite concubine, his most cherished, hell his only one left since he had disposed of the rest. The one thing he liked, that her genuinely cherished was now withering away in his arms.
â Warningâ Minors dni, mentions of death, Sadness, idk what else to put.
GrievingSukuna! Who has never once said "I love you" to anyone not even you. The thought of those words ever leaving his lips made him want to gag except right those words meant everything.
GrievingSukuna! Who listened to your frail voice reassure him that your time spent with him was a joyous one, and that your were just another concubine, that he shouldn't mourn the life of someone who was merely brought to his temple over a year ago for his enjoyment alone.
GrievingSukuna! Who silenced you with the most tender, loving, heart stopping kiss to ever grace your soft yet dry lips as he just could not bare to hear another word. You chipped away of his walls, held his cold heart in your warm hand, and yet you had the nerve to utter nonsense? You had become his pride, the air he breathes, almost his wife, and possibly the barrer of his supposed heir.
GrievingSukuna! Who listened to you final goodbye to him after one last kiss to which he finally spoke those three words...
"Oh, Lord Ryomen, Serving you was..was the best thing that life could have ever given me. Every moment I spent serving you.. I spent without regret, my only regret now is being too weak to serve you any longer. What kind of concubine am I? Heh, forgive me..please forgive me, I- I-..."
You had spent all your energy speaking this blasphemy to him. If he could he would have scolded you right then and there, but there was no time that. All he could was catch your fallen hand that reached for him in an attempt to hold him one more time. You didn't have enough energy left to finish your sentence yet he finished it for you in those last moments he uttered for the first and final time.
"I Love You, (Y/N)... You foolish woman."
He said it, he finally said it, those words from him you would carry into the afterlife with you, A tear fell from your beautiful (E/C) eyes. But these words were only meant for your ears, not even his servant that stood outside his chambers could hear him whispering those three words into your delicate ears.
GrievingSukuna! Who's world came crashing down once your chest rose and fell taking your last breath. Oh the heinous things he would do, the sacrifices he would make, the blood he would give to just hear your sweet voice once more. This hurt him, this pain.. It petrified him, it was like no pain he had ever felt before.
GrievingSukuna! Who after hours of holding your cold corpse, finally allowed his servents to come in and ready you for burial. His face was unreadable to them, but on the inside he was ready to explode with rage, he was ready to curse the heavens and hell for taking what was his away.
GrievingSukuna! Who stayed locked away in his chambers for the next few days leading up to your burial. Oh how you wounded him worse than any man or woman ever could. This wound wasn't something he could just easily no, no, this wound would forever be etched into his mind, body, and soul for as long as he lived.
GrievingSukuna! Who's face remained unreadable during the ceremony, you had no family to join him, just his loyal servents who had grew quite fond of you once upon a time.
GrievingSukuna! Who quickly storm away once your casket was lowered into the ground, he felt his eyes were burning... What was this? Tears!? Never in the beginning of time would Sukuna ever shed a pathetic tear, but he heart could not deny the human emotions that came with once being human. He wouldn't dare let anyone see such an ugly sight, him experiencing sadness.
GrievingSukuna! Who's sadness was quickly replaced with pure, unadulterated rage, every village in 100...No a thousand mile radius was fucked. If he couldn't have the one thing he cherished more than anything in the world then why should everyone else?
GrievingSukuna! Who would go days without returning to his temple until he's had his fill of bloodshed, maybe this was his new found way of coping with the loss of his concubine?
GrievingSukuna! After days of slaughter he would return home to your grave absolutely drenched from head to toe in the blood of the innocent and lay at your grave.
GrievingSukuna! Who would stay at you grave for hours, cursing you to the heavens for leaving him in disarray, for not ripping his heart out his chest to take with you so he wouldn't have to FEEL this pain any longer.
GrievingSukuna! Who would soon slaughter all that were loyal to him as he would rather live in solitude, then to be reminded that he has no one to share the servitude of his people with. Sukuna would rather be alone than to enjoy the finer things without you by his side.
#jujutsu kaisen#jujustsu kaisen x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x you#sukuna fluff#jjk fanfic#jjk drabbles#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#sukuna angst
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Can I request one for Jacaerys Velaryon where Rhaenyra betroths him to his twin sister and they're both super awkward about it. You can write it as you wish.
warnings: i didn't make them twins so interpret her as you'd like, targ!cest (unintentional?), aemond and aegon taunting jace, high valyrion (i'm not fluent forgive me), takes place in 1.08 (lord of the tides), more angsty than awkward, aemond x reader if you squint really really hard?
âHer children are bastards! And she is a whore,â Vaemond Velaryon spoke with vemon on his tongue.
You and your brothers shared a glance of embarassment with one another.
Viserys hobbled up from his seat on the throne, âI will have your tongue for that.â
Before Viserys could get any further Dark Sister flung through the air, taking Vaemondâs head with her. Everyone in the room jumped back, your mother pushing you behind her, as your younger brother gasped.
âHe can keep his tongue,â chaos erupted with the Kingâs guard.
âDisarm him!â
Daemon wiped the Velaryon blood off his sword and sheathed it, ushering you and his daughters out of the room, âNo need.â
-
Later in the dining hall, you and your estranged family stood around a large table, Viserys was carried in and sat in between your mother and Alicent, âHow good it is⌠to see you all tonight⌠together.â
One he was situated, all sat in the respective places, you between Jacaerys and Lucerys.
Alicent looked to her husband, âPrayer before we begin?â
âYes,â your family was not the most religious, you looked to Jace, you looked back at you with an annoyed expression.
âMay the Mother smile down on this gathering with love. May the Smith mend the bonds that have been broken for far too long. And to Vaemond Velaryon, may the gods give him rest.â
Viserys was the first to speak, just barely lifting his cup, âThis is an occasion for celebration, it seems. My grandson Luke, will marry his cousins Rhaena, further strengthening the bond between our houses. A toast to the young Prince⌠and his betrothed! Hear, hear!â
The rest of the table rose their glasses and toasted to your younger brother.
Aegon, sitting next to Jace leaned over and spoke quietly, âYour younger brother bests you once again. Laying with a women before you.â
Viserys spoke again, âLet us toast as well Prince Lucerys⌠the future Lord of the Tides. Hear, hear!â
You smiled at him, squeezing his hand, âYouâll be great.â
Aegon continued on with him, âYou do know how the act is done, I assume? At least in principle? Where to put your cock and all that.â
âLet it be, Aegon,â Helaena chastised him, tired of his jokes.
âYou can play the jester if you wish, but hold your tongue before my sister,â Jace defended you.
Your family sat in tension, your grandsire felt the need to clear the air, âIt both gladdens my heart and fills me with sorrow to see these faces around the table. The faces most dear to me in all the world⌠yet grown so distant from each other⌠in the years past.â
He takes his mask off his face and drops it on the table, âMy own face⌠is no longer a handsome one⌠if indeed it ever was. But tonight⌠I wish you to see me⌠as I am. Not just a king⌠but your father. Your brother. Your husband⌠and your grand sire. Who may not, it seems⌠walk for much longer among you.â
He breathes heavily and struggles with his next words, âLet us no longer hold ill feelings in our hearts. The crown cannot stand strong if the House of the Dragon remains divided. But set aside your grievances. If not for the sake of the crown⌠then for the sake of this old man who loves you all so dearly.â
Your grandsire sits and the room was filled with silence, your mother arose from her place next to him.
âI wish to raise my cup to Her Grace, the Queen. I love my father. But I must admit that no one has stood⌠more loyally by his side than his good wife. She has tended to him with⌠unfailing devotion, love, and honor. And for that, she has my gratitude⌠and my apology.â
Alicent smiles solemnly to Rhaenyra, âYour graciousness moves me deeply, Princess.â
She stands and raises her cup, âWe are both mothers⌠and we love our children. We have more in common than we sometimes allow. I raise my cup to you⌠and to your house. You will make a fine queen.â
Each at the table took turns toasting to the family, each aggrivating Jacaerys more.
Aegon, drunkenly, rose, turning to Luke, âI, um⌠I regret the disappointment you are soon to suffer. But if you ever wish to know what it is to be well satisfied, all you have to do is ask.â
Aegon smiles and turns to Jace now, âAsk me, of course. Your older brother would not know how to guide you.â
Jace stands, slamming his hands down on the table, you grab his wrist, âJace.â
Sternly looking at him, he glances to you before raising his glass, âTo Prince Aegon and⌠Prince Aemond,â Aemondâs face hardens, âWe have not seen each other in years, but I have fond memories of our shared youth. And as men, I hope we may yet be friends and allies. To you and your familyâs good health, dear uncles.â
Jace sits and Heleana stands, âI would like to toast to Baela and Rhaena. Theyâll be married soon. It isnât so bad. Mostly he just ignores you⌠except sometimes when heâs drunk.â
Aegon rolls his eyes in embarassment, Viserys smiles at his youngest daughter, and Daemon gently laughs.
Viserys feels ill and is taken out of the room. Only the Hightower side of the family is left.
Youâve always had a strained relationship with your uncles, but you did love Helaena, often times strolling in the gardens with her, or her teaching you some embroidery tricks.
Aemond glances at you from across the table, a dark and hungry look in his eyes. You look away from him and to your mother. She nods at you, as a way of saying that she would take care of it.
The pig comes out of the kitchens and is brought to the table, Luke chuckles at the sizzling pig. Aemond slams his fist on the table, capturing everyoneâs attention.
âFinal tribute. To the health of my nephews: Jace⌠Luke⌠and Joffrey. Each of them handsome, wise⌠hm⌠strong,â he looks to you and smirks, âAnd my niece, you are of age now, luck to you in finding a husband. Perhaps someone strong, maybe you will find home in the Riverlands.â
âAemond,â Alicent warns.
You can see Jace fuming from beside you, but you gently nudge his foot under the table with yours. You keep your composure.
You hum, smirking back at him, âKirimvose, yn nyke gÄŤmigon nyke kostagon become tolÄŤ than sepÄr mirtysâs riĂąnykeÄ ÄbrazČłrys⌠Kepa.â Thank you, but I know I can become more than just someone's lady wife⌠uncle
âKostilus se ÄbrazČłrys hen nykeÄ darilaros?â Perhaps the wife of a prince?
âNyke unyishishk jorrÄelagon daorun tolÄŤ than naejot sagon se ÄbrazČłrys hen dÄrys's tČłne tresy.â I would love nothing more than to be the wife of the king's second son.
Aemondâs face hardened. Only you, Aemond, your mother, and Daemon fully understood the words exchanged. Your mother and Daemon shared a look of pride.
Alicent looked at the interaction with confusion and furrowed brows.
âWhat are they saying?â
âAemond has proposed a marriage it seems,â Rhaenyra speaks.
Jace looks at you almost angrily, âWhat did you say?â
All eyes were on you, âWhat she said is not important,â your mother interrupted.
She cleared her throat, âWhat matters is that my daughter will wed her brother, Jacaerys, heir to the Iron Throne. She will become queen one day; something more than someoneâs lady wife.â
Everyoneâs eyes widened. You felt heat rise to your cheeks. There is no way that your mother would have you marry your brother?
Aemondâs hardened grin turned to a smug one, âWell then, congratulations is in order to my niece and her strong husband.â
Jace stood and walked towards the center of the room, challenging his uncle, âI dare you to say that again.â
Aemond stood with him, walking to him, âWhy? âTwas only a compliment,â he leaned into Jace, whispering into his ear, âDo you not think yourself Strong?â
Without hesitation, Jace swung at Aemond, getting in a good punch onto his jaw. Everyone around the table gasped, your mother yelled sternly, âJace!â
Aemond reached for his blade, but his motherâs voice stopped him, âAemond! That is enough!â
âGo to your quarters. All of you go, now.â
You stood and watched Jace walk out. You didnât follow him to his quarters to check on him. You stayed in the hall and waited for your mother.
As she came out of the dining hall, you caught up with her.
âMother!â
She turned to you, âWere you telling the truth⌠about me.. and Jace?â
Holding your face in her hands she stroked your cheek with her thumb and smiled gently at you, but you could not meet her eyes, âYou will make a great queen one day, my sweet girl.â
She tugged at your chin to force you to look at her, âBut now, you need to rest, we have quite the journey ahead of us back to Dragonstone, tomorrow.â
You nodded before heading back to your quarters. Nodding at the guards standing at your door, you pushed them open.
Jace, who was waiting for you on your bed, stood at your entrance. You sighed and rolled your eyes.
âJacaerys, it is not proper for you to be in here⌠not anymore.â
âPlease just listen.â
You walked around the room, releasing the maids of their duties, âLeave us.â The maids were quick to exit.
âI did not know she was going to say that!â
âI did not know Aemond would try to wed me tonight.â
âIâm sorry. We do not have to wed if you choose to take someone elseâs handââ
âNo,â shaking your head, âIt is.. our duty now, as the future queenâs eldests.â
âI promise to be a good husbandââ
âJacaerys, I do not wish to speak of this any longer.â
He spoke your name softly, âIâm sorry.â
âLeave me, Jace.â
He said your name more sternly now.
âLeave me, your grace.â
He sunk into himself, hands on his sheathed sword, nodding at you, âAs you wish.â
You watch him leave, the door slamming behind him. You groaned in frustration, running your hands over your face and through your hair.
How are you supposed to marry your brother of all people?
#jacerys velaryon x reader#jacerys targaryen#jacerys velaryon#jace velaryon#jace velaryon x reader#x reader#house of the dragon x reader#hotd x reader#jacaerys targaryen#jacaerys velaryon x reader#jacaerys velaryon#jacaerys x reader
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Yan!Husband Henry VIII Headcanons (Romantic)
â đ â lady l: This has been in my draft for a while but I decided to finish it now lol. Hope you like it! Forgive me for any mistakes. â¤ď¸đ§Ą
âtw: obsessive and possessive behavior, toxic relationship, mention of death perhaps.
âđpairing: yandere!henry viii x female!reader.
You had already dreamed of marrying a King, of becoming his Queen and giving birth to his heirs, a romantic fantasy that you and many other young women have dreamed of. They were mere fantasies of romance that you made up, but never really thought it would happen or become the obsession of one of the most infamous Kings in the history of England.
Your dreams remained as they were, dreams of a young lady. The King of the country where you lived was already married, so there wasn't much chance of you marrying him. Your family was of noble enough origin and had considerable wealth, but nothing too extravagant.
Until your older sister's marriage to a powerful man, close to the King. With that, your family immediately moved to the English Court, excited about their new status. Your father was particularly eager to marry you off to a powerful man as well.
Henry was dissatisfied with his wife, Anne, she had failed to conceive the much-desired male heir he so desperately wanted. His wandering eyes began to wander to the young women of the Court and when he laid eyes on you, he knew you would be the one to give him what he wanted.
Henry's captivating gazes seemed to follow you wherever you went and it began to unnerve you. A hint of excitement perhaps, but you knew it was a dangerous game to get involved with the King, especially when he was married.
Your parents were immensely happy with the King's interest in you. If you became his mistress, it would bring benefits and riches to your family. And when Henry got tired of you, you could perhaps marry a man with a noble title. Maybe a Duke or a Marquis.
But you didn't want to be his mistress or anyone's mistress. You wanted a husband and not a mere toy that he could always discard later. Your resistance angered your parents but attracted Henry even more. Your rejecting him has stirred him up, and bewitched him even more. Whenever you were in a room, Henry's eyes would be on you.
All of Henryâs attention was on you and you would be lying if you said you didnât like it. He didn't even try to hide his affection for you, he sent you gifts and letters constantly. You reciprocated, sending him letters in return, but always remaining firm in your convictions.
Before long, Henry was deeply in love with you and quickly got rid off his current wife, Anne. When he asked you to marry him, shortly after his separation from Anne, you hesitated but accepted. You would finally become his and his alone.
Once you were married, Henry became more possessive than ever. He already didn't like the looks other gentlemen gave you, but now that you were officially his, it would be considered a crime of treason. And we know how he deals with betrayal.
You were his perfect Queen, so sweet and so, well, perfect. Henry makes a point of reminding you of that every day, about how perfect you were for him. He really was in love, so he kept on your side the whole time. His eyes remained only on you.
Henry truly values ââyou and your opinion. It is not a custom, but he would be willing to listen to your wishes and political opinions (if you have any) on matters of state. You are his Queen, after all. If it was your wish, if you were Catholic, Henry could even try to restore Catholicism in England.
He really loved you, maybe not in the conventional way, but he did. Henry would listen to your wishes, fulfill them and all he wants in return is his love. He will not tolerate people speaking ill of you and will condemn anyone who does so for treason.
Henry would be loyal to you, he would take care of you until your death. He wants to have children with you, a family, a male heir, but he also wants to be with you. He could be himself and not the King of England.
And when you finally gave him his long-awaited male heir, Henry knew he would never let you go or let anything happen to you. After all, you are his wife and his Queen. And Henry doesn't handle treason very well.
#yandere history#yandere historical characters#history#the tudors#yandere the tudors#yandere henry viii#yandere Henry VIII x reader#yandere henry viii headcanons#henry viii x reader#headcanons#yandere headcanons
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hey! I'm not really into nsfw stuff- sooo would you like to do something soft with reo? đ like, idk, him as a husband or father so with a family? THANK YOU SO MUCH đđ
âŽâË domestic reo headcanons âŽâË
a/n: this is so brain rotted i canât even lie i think reo is just so easy to romanticize. pure fluff.
⢠| BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy !! - aria đ | â˘
⎠I actually love this because i headcanon that reo would be a great dad :D at the very least heâd be extremely supportive of whatever his children wanted to do in their lives. He wouldnât force them to follow in his footsteps like his father and heâd use whatever devices he could to ensure they can comfortably follow the path they choose.
⎠Would post about all his childrenâs accomplishments, or if you guys didnât feel comfortable posting the kids heâd still take any chance to tell everyone about it - even his teammates who literally donât care that his son got the highest score on the spelling test (theyâre happy for him though). He secretly enjoys scrapbooking for his kids but theyâre âyour booksâ and he âjust helps you with it sometimesâ. (heâs the one who took almost all the pictures and saved every piece of paper his kid has ever drawn on)
⎠Reo is a charming husband, so charming and sweet itâs hard to be mad at him. Heâs a bit lacking in cleaning/caretaking capabilities when it comes to the home but he puts in the effort??? He tries his best and if he does a bad job he always makes it up to you one way or another. In all honesty, heâs probably already hired people to do that (forgot this man is inheriting a multi millionaire dollar corporation).
⎠Reo is however very good at taking care of children. Once he has a clear grasp of their needs, he finds it to be really enjoyable and fulfilling. He takes a lot of pride in whatever happiness and comfort he can bring to his kids. He hates the sound of his babies crying, not because itâs annoying (though he complains about that too) but because it genuinely hurts his soul. He can be a bit too worrisome about it sometimes - heâs totally the type of person to look up his childâs symptoms and freak out over seeing all the worst case scenarios.
⎠The one thing that reo particularly excels at is taking care of you when youâre sick. He can always tell when youâre not feeling your best and he immediately harps on you. He doesnât know how to cook very well but he knows how to make a few different kinds of warm foods to fill your stomach and give you a little energy. Heâd absolutely refuse to stay away from you (unless it was a seriously contagious illness or if you guys had a baby that couldâve gotten sick). Doesnât care if youâre sneezing and coughing and wheezing, he wants to feed you and hold you and kiss your hot head until it cools down and everything is better again. His goal is always to make sure you get better as soon as possible and wonât let you do anything but rest and relax until then.
⎠Reo is an incredible gift giver! Iâve certainly mentioned this in another hc post, but he is always out and about buying you little things that remind him of you. If you guys have a kid thatâs just more gifts heâll have to get and the thought of that honestly excites him.
⎠Anything can happen butâŚreo with a daughterâŚguysâŚ.
⎠he would be the sweetest girl dad! would do everything in his power to make her believe sheâs an actual princess and heâs just one of her loyal servants. Spoils her rotten and doesnât feel bad about it.
⎠Youâd have to explain to him how this could negatively affect your daughter and it would break his heart. Heâd go into theatrics trying to refute it because âWhat do you mean I canât let her have everything she wants?â and âWhat if she cries? You want me to make my daughter cry?â he gets it eventually, but remains reluctant lol.
⎠Heâd love playing sports with his kids. Would try to get them into soccer but if they end up liking another sport heâs still just as hype. Isnât initially familiar with the concept of letting the kids win but soon realized he has to level with the speed of their little legs.
⎠I donât have any specific hcâs for him as a boy dad but heâd be just as great of course - heâd make sure his son sees how women should be treated based on how he treats you!
⎠If he could find a way to make you the total world ruler he would because he truly believes youâre the most capable person. Heâs the kind of husband who lets you run things for the most part but is always there to step in when you need a break or if you just want him by your side. Would call for an emergency flight back home from whatever country heâs training in just because you said you didnât wanna go to parent teacher night alone.
⎠He loves doing mundane tasks with you, but always tries to âmake it a bit more funâ as he says - which basically means he puts away the clothes you fold while you listen to him crack really bad jokes at you, gossip about his teammates, or try to sing and serenade you with his MANY playlists heâs made dedicated to you. On days you both have nothing going on he follows you around the house like a lost puppy, which is slightly annoying but it also means you have four hands to do stuff because heâs a participator above all else.
⎠Reo always makes sure to show his appreciation for how hard you work whether itâs at your job, taking care of the kids/house, or both. He takes time alone with you very seriously, even as your lives get busier and your family grows he always makes sure thereâs time for the two of you to just be together and be in love. Always jokes about how you guys need to keep the romance going. He has small romantic gestures that he indulges you in throughout the day: kissing you on the cheek, brushing your hair out of your face/tying it back for you if you if you need (taking his hair tie out for you to use), hugging you a little tighter just before you get up, running a bath for the both of you, massaging your shoulders while you talk.
to be fully honest with you guys, i have never in my life wanted to have kids so it was a bit hard for me to imagine what being happy with children would be like LMAO but alas i did my best. stay safe and stay cool. - aria :3
#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock headcanons#blue lock fanfiction#bllk imagines#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk fluff#mikage reo x reader#reo mikage x reader#mikage reo#bllk reo#reo mikage#blue lock reo#reo x reader#mikage reo x you#reo mikage fluff#blue lock fluff#⥠â individual training
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Caitlyn's Objectives for Zaun are Vague and Terrible.
"Locate Jinx."
Plenty of people have already talked about this one, but there's a clear "and" missing to this statement. Caitlyn isn't going to just find Jinx say mission accomplished and go back to Piltover. She's left her intentions for Jinx ambiguous to her superiors (Ambessa) and subordinates alike, which leaves room for the situation to escalate.
"Dismantle shimmer."
I cannot overstate how bad of an idea it is. It seems simple in excution. Secure the refineries, detain Singed and other chemists that manufacture it, and destroy any existing supplies. But everything else that comes with it will turn the situation even worse.
I'm not even talking about the fact that Caitlyn is suggesting everyone in Zaun addicted to shimmer immediately go cold turkey without warning, preparation, or their consent. It's that fact that she's essentially destroying the only form of healthcare infrastructure that exists in Zaun.
For all the bad shimmer can do, it's still an effective medicine when used right. It's not a coincidence that once Silco took over and introduced shimmer there's suddenly people with visible disabilities and prosthetics on screen existing in Zaun. They exist because shimmer makes it possible. Even 5 out the 6 chembarons, the richest and most powerful people in Zaun, are disabled or use mobility aids. Chembarons like Smeech quite obviously use shimmer (his eyes are pink in every scene including his character sheet) to manage his prosthetics, he's had all four limbs replaced.
How many people live like Silco, with a chronic illness (probably a dangerous infection because Zaun is Piltover's human/industrial wastepit) that needs to be treated daily? How many people are practically dead and buried if the enforcers manage to destroy all remaining shimmer?
"Neutralize any agents still loyal to Silco."
What does that even mean? What does being loyal to Silco mean when he's dead? They're getting rid of all infrastructure related to shimmer production. The only thing that remains of Silco that anyone can be loyal to is the belief he left behind (and maybe Jinx but that's complicated).
Above all else (except Jinx), Silco wanted an independent Zaun. Will That's his whole thing, and shimmer was just the mechanism to make it happen. Will anyone who agrees that Zaun should be independent be considered a Silco loyalist? If so, then Caitlyn's mission isn't just about finding Jinx and getting shimmer off the streets, this is about crushing an independence movement AGAIN.
How will she characterize Silco's loyalists? Is she talking about chembarons that worked with Silco? Former members of his gang? People who worked in Silco's factories and liked the paycheck? Silco was the defacto leader of Zaun, most if not all figures in Zaun with influence were essentially complicit in his agenda.
Is there any real difference between anti-Piltovan sentiment and pro-Zaunite independence at this point?
#arcane#arcane meta#caitlyn kiramman#these are all just vague justifications to establish an occupation in zaun#those check points in the teaser don't look like temporary structures#they're there to further restrict the movement of zaunites not just at the bridge now but in the city itself#caitlyn is going to gum this whole thing up and it's no surprise Vi can't show her face in zaun#these are all vague and poorly thought through objectives that have no timelines and/or will escalate tensions in zaun against piltover#do you think children in zaun will make snappy rhymes to make fun of caitlyn and her mom#you think jinx will edit some of them#this is all based on the teaser so things could change#mostly a rant
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