#but if she does not go into remission then I know to look for more affordable options now

[remyfire]

Weegi woke me up in the middle of the night for the third night in a row because of course he did, the big baby, but I’m wibbly because I realized I met my fundraising goal for Peach in under 12 hours 🥺🥹😭❤️ I had her post queued up another two times and I was able to go delete those augh. Thank you to everyone who boosted and donated!! Here is another Peach picture to celebrate

[alnilaem]

cw for kidnapping and emotional manipulation

-

Ghost spots a bird across the pub with her wings clipped. She trembles as she watches her friend disappear into the sea of gyrating bodies, holding onto a man she just met and is deciding to abandon her for.

“You don’t mind, right?” Her friend had asked.

She chirped ditheringly. “Um… sure, yeah. You go have fun.”

A fickle smile split her cheeks. A warm wash of liquid glossed her eyes.

Ghost watches her watching her friend. Sadness is written into her features. That type of sadness so deep-seated you feel it crushing your ribs, denting your heart. She sighs and hangs her head, staring down at her drink. Her ice cube has melted, the salt crusting her rim having hardened. Her shoulder start to shake.

Ghost decides it would be remiss of him to not check up on her. The bird with frilly feathers and bent wings, wounded, too feeble to fight back.

He throws back the rest of his drink. He doesn’t wince at the burn, but still, Ghost’s face puckers into something different. Something mean as he approaches her and lays his elbow on the bar’s sticky countertop, splitting his hand across the top of her spine.

“What’s a bird like you doin’ all alone?”

She girdles. It’s like she’s been folded in two and hung out to dry, the way she shrinks into herself and flexes her shoulders.

His words hang stagnant for a few seconds. Perhaps it will make him lose interest and slip away, but Ghost is a persistent one. The badges embroidered into his uniform are a testament to that.

He passes his thumb over her neck. She shivers.

“I… um. Well, my boyfriend’s in the bathroom.”

Ghost almost chuckles. The bird says it with such skittish conviction that surely, not even she believes it.

He grunts. “It’s rude to lie, y’know.”

She gulps. “My friend’s with me.”

“The one that just left you?” He asks. “A pretty shit friend, if you ask me. A bird like you deserves someone better.”

She purses her lips because they begin to quiver. She tries shouldering him away, tries blinking back the fat tears of brine that threaten to thaw and slip down her cheek. Her voice is distorted with discomfort and self-pity when she replies, “That’s stupid. I just want her to be happy.”

“And her?” Ghost prompts. He distracts her with his rough lilt as he slips his hand low, into the divot between her ass and waist. “How often does she fuck off with the men you fancy?“

She flinches. It’s the sudden recoil of her muscles, and her mind’s attempt at getting away from him.

“I-it’s not like that.”

“Yeah?” He asks. “It’s not like she leaves you alone every time you go out, lookin’ like a dolt when she finds someone more fun?”

She swallows thickly. Her lips warble around her next words. “… Sometimes, I guess.”

Ghost’s cock jumps. The fat mass pushes against his jeans, angled towards her.

“Yeah,” he croons. “I know how hard it can be. Why don’t you come over to my flat, huh? Give ‘er a taste of her own medicine.”

She inches away. Ghost only holds her tighter, gripping that broken little wing of hers and doting on it.

“I don’t… do that stuff. Sorry.”

Something primal in Ghost barks. That stuff. She’s never taken dick? Or never taken dick from a stranger? Either way, Ghost’s cock stirs and starts drooling on his thigh. She can probably see it. That blotchy stain on his jeans under the mellow lighting.

“I play nice, bird,” he mutters. “And wouldn’t it be nice to get back at them? Your mate? All those blokes who ignored you?”

She squeezes her thighs when Ghost settles his hand on her ass. She has trouble pulling them back apart, her thighs that is, as they’re adhered with slick.

“I asked you a question. Wouldn’t it be nice?”

“I guess so…” she whimpers. Keening into Ghost’s whispering touch, the heat of his cock.

He pulls a wad of cash from his pocket and slams it onto the table. He stands up, looking something like a predator on its hind legs, and pulls her from the barstool.

“Let’s go, pretty bird,” he leashes his hand around the base of her neck, leading her outside and into his rust-spattered truck. “You deserve it.”

A stroke of heat licks up her innards. She’s already dazed by the time she’s in his truck, preening as he splits his hand across her leg and digs divots into her thigh, kneading her supple flesh. She’s bleary eyes and impaired on arousal as they drive past the city’s margins and into the outback, the roads turning pebbled.

She’s too excited, too sweet to heed Ghost pulling her out of his truck and hauling her into a neglected flat.

She only feels his hands on her, big and warm. And the cool carbon steel of handcuffs locking around her ankle.

She smiles.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

do you have any particular rap recommendations? i'm open to the genre but i haven't really vibed musically with any of the more popular rap artists. i'd really like to listen to more of it but i just don't know where to really start looking

god do I ever. I have no idea who you haven't previously vibed with so if I say someone you don't like then cope, I'm telling you about my personal favorites.

first and foremost remember that love of my life Janelle Monáe raps like hell

Little Simz is simply electric and her album Sometimes I Might Be Introvert is one of the most breathtaking audio experiences I've ever had

Dua Saleh makes me insaaaaane xyr music is so good and also frequently NASTY gay shit (as linked)

I looove Doechii she hits you going like 4000 miles per hour brain go BRRRRRRRR

I just got into Flyana Boss when they opened up for Janelle on tour last year, they're so cute and funny and their energy is incredible

Tierra Whack does a lot of kooky silly shit I adore her

I never really got into BROCKHAMPTON but Kevin Abstract is my #1 sad gay man, this whole album is everything to me

I don't know, like, anything about Aminé outside of his music but that's fine because his music fucks like hell

and I'd be remiss if I didn't include Megan Thee Stallion and a song that reduces me to emotional shambles

[ihtherik]

When You Bare Your Teeth It Almost Looks like a Smile

Pairing: Astarion x Female!Tav (not described)

Astarion’s POV

SFW/Fluff/Angst (seriously there’s no s€x here)

Summary: Set in Act 2 when the group begins scouring Moonrise Towers and Astarion and Tav encounter Araj Oblodra, the Drow blood merchant. She won’t take no for an answer, and learns why that is a very very stupid thing to do.

~3.2 K words

Bit of a deviation from the canon interactions/dialogue and what the outcome is because ummm little guard dog with her love that most certainly does doesn’t need one is a trope I LOVE and needed to vomit out a lil flash fic at 1 AM last night to perform catharsis help I also kind of made myself sad

I may get this posted on my AO3?

I also will post the next part of Turn My Heart to a Spade soon!!!

“Oh, but I’d prefer if you did.”

The sneering Drow’s reply to his assurances that he would not bite anyone doesn’t quite register for Astarion before she lets slip another gut-reeling string of words, this time directed at you.

“I assume he belongs to you? Judging by the way he’s clung to your shadow since you walked up…” her laugh is mirthful, the metallic smear of red around the blue-grey skin of her eyelids crinkling and cracking in her amusement. “It’s a truly remarkable boon, to have had a spawn at your beck and call during your trek through the Shadow-cursed lands. I’d be remiss and dishonest to say I’m not jealous.”

His pale brows furrow as an unfamiliar emotion hits him. Maybe unfamiliar isn’t right, but he’s been so long separated from it that encountering it again feels like meeting a stranger he’s all too wary of.

Much like how he felt when he met you.

Kind, generous, trusting, infuriating you.

Oh, how he loathed being proven wrong. Having his tried and true skills of determining who people are and what they want sidestepped, his—sometimes hastily drawn—conclusions about things tipped on their heads like a cat swiping a cup off a table. Mostly by you. Endearingly and maddeningly.

For Gods’ sakes, he is supposed to be the unpredictable, unreadable, unflappable one. It’s his armour. His sodding lifeline. When one is in control of their faculties and has only themselves to rely on, their ability to save themselves is entirely up to their skills, or lack thereof.

But you, you whose only purpose was to take a fall or stab (sometimes literally) for him, has somehow managed to get him to willingly hand over the one thing that could kill him.

His trust.

It had kept him from trancing, some nights, gnawing the inside of his lip to shreds while going over every possible scenario in which his trust could be wielded against him.

Yet thus far, you’d not only permitted, but encouraged him to hold the other metaphorical end of it.

Both in battle, and in his bedroll.

He wonders most days if you know. If you’ve caught onto what he’s now realized was a very poorly conceived ploy. He has to tell you, at some point.

There’d been a humbling, blind fierceness in every fiber of your being when you last drew your weapon for him—looking up at the devil Yugir as if he didn’t have his crossbow bolt aimed right between your glaring brows. You swung and hacked and sliced like it was your soul you were fighting for, not his.

You’d done more than received his trust, you’d earned the right to hold it.

And here he is, silently watching, pleading, mentally tugging on the other end like a child grasping at their mother’s shirt—hoping you feel it.

“He has a name,” your voice appears as even as ever to the average onlooker, and certainly to this Drow; but there’s a strain, a warning that Astarion can detect that, to him, feels like the gentlest tug back from your end on the rope.

“Is that so? How quaint,” the Drow tilts her head. Turning her attention back to him, she appraises him from his boots up to his curls with a gaze that makes that strange, ugly feeling swell again. “Do indulge me then, what are you called, spawn?”

“Astarion—but-hold on—“

“Well, Astarion,” the way her tongue flicks over every syllable of his name puts a crinkle of disgust on the slope of his nose. So unlike how you say it. Usually uttered, quick and delicate, the ‘Ah’ nearly clipped off—shortening it to ‘Starion. Familiar and sweet and warm. “I’ve dreamt of being bitten by a vampire since I was a young girl.”

His disbelief manifests in the way he stutters over his words, managing to compose himself into a semblance of his normal character by the end of his reply. “You—What? I’m sorry, You—you want to be bitten?”

“To feel your life’s blood slipping away? To dance between the edge of life and death? Yes, I want it.”

Though he’s already decided that this woman is, in fact, a stem short of a brain, the arrangement she proposes catches his attention. And not in any way that’s enticing. A likely dangerous and potentially faulty potion in exchange for drinking her blood is a shoddy deal at best, and a revolting one at worst. Her blood smells foul. Acrid. He can’t pinpoint exactly what it is, which only worries him more. Not a sort of sickly sweet smell of decay like Gale’s. Nor is it twinged with something medicinal like Halsin’s, or like the pleasant muddle of Shadowheart’s half-elven and half-human blood. And certainly not like yours.

Putting on all the politeness he can muster, which is already more than the Drow deserves, he replies.

“I will have to…erm, decline.”

“Excuse me?” The Drow scoffs, displeasure creasing the space between her brows. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and you’re squandering it.”

“I gave you my answer,” he shocks himself with the lack of grace he speaks with, voice lowered and snarling. He used to be so good at evading people like her. What the Hells has gotten into him?

Tutting, the Drow turns back to you. “Can you talk some sense into your obstinate charge?” Addressing you like he’s not in the room, with scant more respect for you than she had for him.

Proving the Drow’s earlier observation right—as loyal as a bloody mutt—he looks to you, anxiety tightening the muscles over his stomach. The scenarios begin to churn in his mind, the worst among them not even that of you asking him to bite her to get the potion—but instead acquiescing his wants in front of the Drow only to reprimand or even punish him in some way later.

They come to a hilt as both he and the Drow await your move, holding his breath.

Then, you do something that manages to stun, relieve, and thrill him all at once.

You smile.

Though a half of a head shorter than him, and barely a few inches taller than the Drow, your presence seems to swell to intimidating heights among the three of you.

“My, you are slow on the uptake, Ms. Araj,” you speak with a lowered, gentle voice, one which commands the both of them to listen carefully—maybe even get closer, though at this point the Drow would have to have a death wish to get within stabbing distance of you. How dreadful, and disappointing, to Astarion; that the ominous and certain threat in your voice still yet seems to fly over the Drow’s head.

And how entertaining it will surely be to watch her pomp crumble in a few moments.

“My dear companion deigned to give you his name and answer, twice. I would pity the other acolytes and pilgrims here—if I cared for their lives—for the mere cruelty it is to converse with you in any capacity.”

Dear companion? Now this is new. And not…entirely unpleasant.

“I’m—sorry, I—“ the Drow’s poise wavers, though outrage still lines the edges of her voice.

“You will be sorry, if you do not shut your Godsdamned mouth while I speak,” you let the full fury of your voice be felt, though you have yet to raise it past what can be heard within five paces of the Blood Merchant.

As a meager credit to the Drow’s intelligence, she does snap her jaw shut. Astarion’s lips curl all the higher with each passing second.

“As I was saying—though I do not pity the acolytes here for the ordeal it must be to give you some form of station here, I think I have reason enough to remove you from it. For how you have treated my—for how you have treated Astarion,” your smile beams brighter, not a crease beneath your eyes to suggest you’re anything but seething. He realizes, in a way, you’re baring your teeth for him. The near possessive slip seems to loosen the anxiety in his frame, slightly. But your self-correction helps more.

“You may be a True Soul, but you don’t have any authority to—“ the Drow’s lips suddenly quiver shut again, but clearly not of her own doing. Astarion glances at you and his own tadpole wriggles as he feels yours come to life.

“I should have been more specific,” you sigh, your tadpole holding the Drow rigid. Brushing past him, you beckon with your finger as you move towards the balcony’s doorway across the room. The Drow begins to follow, feet shuffling awkwardly as the fear wells in her eyes. He’s not used to feeling planted to the floor, but for a moment he can only watch in gleeful disbelief at what you’re doing. He picks up his feet at the Drow crosses the threshold and slips out to the balcony with the two of you.

“When I said I had reason enough to remove you from your station, I meant that in less of a bureaucratic sense—I mean literally remove you from it,” you continue to hold the conversation calmly, one-sidedly, as you turn back to look at the Drow from the stacked-stone guardrail. You point and snap your fingers, gesturing to the one spot on this balcony where the stones have broken off and fallen down to the inky, boulder filled shallows at the bottom of the tower. The Drow moves even more resistantly as the psionic force from your tadpole urges her to obey, but eventually she stands at its edge.

“Tell me, Araj, would you like the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to feel what it’s like to fly? All you have to do—“ you lay a hand upon her back, just between her shoulder blades, giving her the slightest nudge. “Is step off.”

Astarion hears a strange, strained sounding humming, and realizes it’s the Drow trying to plead behind sealed lips.

“Oh—but it’s a simple exchange, really! And I’m a woman of my word. You step off, and I cast ‘Fly’ upon you. The only risk is if you fall too quickly, well—then my spell won’t reach you in time…and I’ve only seen it happen once before, but to fall from this height? Your body would pop like a champagne bottle thrown to the floor. Skin and muscle and bone will split, and all your warm guts and blood will burst and spray everywhere. What do you say? In my mind, it’d be plain idiotic to squander an opportunity like this.”

You turn back, meeting Astarion’s eye. Within yours, he can see a volatile mix ready to explode. Wrath. Outrage. A cruel hunger for revenge.

But even with those powerful emotions threatening to overtake you, there’s a tenuous thread of patience still wavering. Patience, and a question: that which asks for his permission. To not merely act or speak on his behalf, but decide whether or not to take this woman’s life for the affronts to his dignity and autonomy.

Indignation. Righteous indignation.

That is the feeling that’s been gnawing at him, the words for which he couldn’t recall until now. And it’s all because of you. Because you’ve refused to let him think of himself, talk about himself, treat himself, like a loaner to his own body and mind. Stepping off the wall, he approaches the two of you with a swagger.

First taking hold of a strap on the Drow’s armor, he then plants a steady foot on a piece of the stone guardrail to hold himself upright. Looking to you with a reassuring smirk, you step back, and with a rough shove Astarion sends the Drow’s upper half forward, dangling her precariously over the edge of the balcony. He lets her moan and protest wildly behind her teeth for a moment longer before nodding to you, and you release her from the hold of the tadpole. She takes a ragged gasp, as if preparing to scream, and he leans in to her ear.

“Now now, Araj, let’s not arouse any undesirable attention from the guards, hm?”

Stifling a groan of fear, her arms unsteadily pinwheel in the air as her feet try to find solid stone, and not the edge which Astarion has forced her onto.

“I think I’m feeling generous, so close to the overwhelming splendor of the Absolute—“ he mocks the name of the so-called deity that had proven itself a thorn in their group’s side thus far. “Whom, need I mention, blessed and deemed me a True Soul, just like my dear companion.”

Throwing a conspiratorial smile your way, it deflates only slightly to see your face set so tightly, all but trembling in anger. Not at him, of course. With a sigh, he tuts and yanks the Drow from the edge, throwing her to the stone floor of the balcony further in. She scrambles back from the both of you. Following her towards the door with unhurried steps, he tilts his head in the same mocking way she had before addressing her once more. “The next time someone tells you ‘no’, Drow, I suggest you not argue. You might not be so lucky next time.”

—

The two of you eventually reconvene with the remainder of your group, and after determining your next move you all settle within an abandoned wing of the tower for the night.

Neither of you relay what happened to the rest of your companions—and in turn don’t find an easy opportunity to address it with each other, until the others have gone to bed.

He finds you hunched over your pack, inventorying your potions yet again—worrying and fidgeting his hands and fingers as he approaches.

“I think we’ll come across more, we’ve not unlocked every door in this bloody tower,” he offers—sounding uncharacteristically optimistic. It betrays just how uncertain and uncomfortable he feels about what he’s actually come over to say to you.

“Ah, I know. Just a bit paranoid since we got here. We had our asses kicked out in Reithwin, then again when we took care of Raphael’s dirty laundry—and to walk in to that whole spectacle with Thorm? Gods above—“ you huff, coaxing a genuine smile to Astarion’s face. Finally you turn, rising from your crouched position with a tired, lopsided grin. It falters as you take in his expression, and Astarion worries he’ll collapse in on himself if you look at him for a moment longer like you currently are.

Like you’re concerned about him. Which you are. Like you care for him. Which you do.

Like you love him.

“Everything alright, ‘Starion?”

“Oh—yes, of course I’m fine-“ he stumbles over every word, his charming, easy, impervious shell cracking. “It’s just that…I feel—awful.”

You push aside your own exhaustion, giving him your full attention—of course you do. You ask him why. He’d almost rather pull his own fangs out than confess what he’s about to. But as you listen, as you take in everything he hurries and tries to explain or make excuses for, your expression does not change. Not for the worse, anyway. Those same shining, gentle eyes hold his, and make his undead heart swell. He makes sure to express his gratitude, for how you stood up to the Drow—but even more so for letting him decide.

“Well—yeah,” you sheepishly look down at your feet, scrubbing at the back of your hair. He almost can’t take it, how wonderful you are. “I wasn’t going to rob you of that satisfaction,” you joke. Sighing, you meet his eye again. “I was ready to kill her, Astarion. You know I was. But then… I wouldn’t have done anything for you. Not really. Who’d’ve been empowered if I’d done it? Definitely not you. So, sorry for almost doing that. I was…well, I was fucking pissed.”

He’s not sure if he can recall how to breathe. How could you be apologetic right now, when you were ready to defend him like some knight in shining armor? He came here to apologize to you, not the other way around.

“Hells, darling, I might find an opportunity to make you a villain yet,” he offers you a small smile, voice soft.

You reciprocate, your cheeks dusted with a blush illuminated by the few candles lit outside your tent.

“So, um…what you said—about forcing yourself through-does that mean our—erm,” you try to be so cordial, so empathetic, even though pain seeps from every pore at the implication of what he said.

“No—no, darling,” he rushes out, taking a breath. “Being…close to someone, it just…it was always something I did, had to do, to lure people back—for him. I—want us to be different. I know we are. But intimacy feels…” he struggles to articulate it, feeling your eyes on him even as his own flit around the shadows of the room. “…tainted. I just…don’t know how else to be with someone, no matter how much I’d like to.”

“I care about you, Astarion,” you murmur after a heavy pause, and he manages to find your eyes again.

“Really?” He asks, throat filled with a bubble of emotion that threatens to burst.

And where words failing him and the inability to wield his body would normally make him feel completely hollow—a useless husk of a man—the embrace your arms suddenly surround him in makes him seem…whole. Solid.

And unfortunately, capable of dragging him down to the depths of sadness and pain with how heavy he now feels.

However, your arms around him remind him that you’re there with him. That you will be there with him no matter what, Gods and Devils and Mindflayers be damned.

Astarion remembers how to use his own as realizes they’ve been merely hovering, outstretched, and hugs you back. You tighten around him, sighing into his shirt.

He closes his eyes, nuzzling his face into your hair, into the crook of your neck—looking for those places he’d be happily cradled in for the rest of his thus-far miserable life.

When you eventually pull back—Astarion’s hands linger at your waist, his fingers almost curling around your shirt to tug you back in.

“You’re—um-full of surprises,” he musters a shaky smile, which you reciprocate, warmly.

“I am yours until you tire of me, Astarion,” you offer half-jokingly, the gravity of which does not go amiss in his mind.

“Well, unfortunately for you, I don’t sleep—so don’t get your hopes up for being rid of me, darling.”

Your eyes crease, nearly obscuring your irises as you smile.

“I love you, Astarion,” the words are carried from your lips on a breath as it slips out—falling tenderly as a kiss to his ears and piercing as true as an arrow through his heart.

You can tell as much, stepping forward into his arms once more to squeeze his hand and reassure him. “You—you don’t have to say it back. I just want—need you to know that. In the event we die tomorrow or something. Very real possibility, given our dwindling potions.”

“Oh. Well. If we’re telling each other things we need to know, I suppose I should tell you how I’ve been building a stash of potions I’ve erm…borrowed from you, then. You know, clearing guilty consciences and all,” he counters, squeezing your hand back. “I’ll share them with you—as a last resort—of course.” You snort, and then fall into a fit of giggles that he’s dragged into all too easily.

After a considerable effort and a number of failed attempts to stop laughing, a sharp ‘Tsk’va’ uttered from Lae’zel’s tent nearby finally manages to silence you both as you slip into his tent, you staying awake only long enough for him to clear the bedroll of clutter and shake the blankets out.

As you settle your cheek on his chest, snuggled up to his side, his lips press idle kisses to your forehead and hair, desiring to commit your smell, warmth, and weight in his arms to memory.

He eventually slips into a trance—for once, one not filled with crimson eyes and shadows and death—but your sweet smile, laugh, and the way those three words he once longed to forget sound in your voice.

[hughiecampbelle]

The Boys Preference: Reader Having A Chronic Illness

Inspired By: @thatstonedwriter and their adorable fic Pain In The Ass (Butcher x Chronic Illness!Reader) Please go check it out! I absolutely love it!!! 💕

A/N: Butcher looks so good in that gif oml 🫣 Anyways lol I can only speak for my own issues when I say it's absolutely the most frustrating thing I've ever dealt with. I wanted to keep it vague enough so as many people as possible could relate instead of just for the stomach problem/joint pain/fever babes :P Not requested, but something that's been on my mind!! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Butcher, truthfully, worries a lot. Unlike Hughie, who has that worry written all over his face, Butcher is a lot more secretive about it. On the outside, he seems unbothered. Unfazed. When you finally admitted you're in a lot of pain and might not be able to take part in the mission, he gives you a "new" job back at the office that you can totally do from the couch under variously temperatured pads. Only a few times have you seen his mask of cool slip, especially when you were in serious pain/had to go the hospital. He didn't realize it was that serious, that it could get that serious. He might be hesitant to visit you, and does it out of the hours, but you'll wake up to him sitting next to you. He'll flip through a magazine like it's not shocking he's even there. He'll ask how you're feeling and get a nurse if you need one. He's awkward and at time hostile, but he really does mean to be thoughtful and affectionate. It just never comes out right.

Hughie, at first, kinda freaks out. Internally, of course. You can sense his panic, though. You assure him it comes in phases, in flare ups, and that eventually, hopefully, it will go into remission. You don't sugar coat it though. You want to be upfront about everything, even the more embarrassing symptoms like, for example, numerous trips to the bathroom. He's very attentive, even to things you don't even realize you're doing. He learns all your remedies and is quick to ask if you can handle xyz. He doesn't want to baby you, he makes that clear, but he can't imagine the pain you're in constantly and just wants to be there for you. Your favorite thing is when he sits with you and holds your hand or rubs your back. He'll watch TV and do research for the team and just be there for you. He knows there's not a lot that'll make you feel better, but being there for you is the least he can do, especially when nothing else is working.

Annie is a planner. She comes up with a plan for everything, especially if your health takes a turn for the worse. She's always there if you need anything. She carries her own pharmacy in her bag, not just for you, but there are all of your favorite remedies in there just in case. She doesn't make a big show if you need anything. She's always offering gum and mints and bandaids to everyone. Her rummaging around in her purse isn't too out of the norm. Like M.M. she does a lot of her own research and, like Kimiko, asks you a lot of questions. She wants to know what's typical pain and what's atypical. She worries about you, especially when you push yourself too hard thinking you're not good for the team unless you're useful. Everyone needs to rest regardless of illness or not. She'll invite you to watch a movie or listen to her Starlight House speech/plans as a sneaky way of getting you to rest with her. She knows you're not incapable, she just worries you're hurting yourself trying to prove your worth when everyone on the team already sees that worth, sees that they need you.

M.M. researches as much as possible. He wants to know what's wrong, what helps, what doesn't, the complications, everything. He knows you've got your own system, your own remedies, so he stocks up on everything you use and need and keeps it at his place/in his car so you don't have to worry. You try not to complain about it, to keep it to yourself, everyone in your life being less than enthusiastic when they listen, but he makes it known you can come to him no matter what. He's always checking in with you quietly, so as not to make a big deal about it, trying to make accommodations when you need them. You're thankful for him and his approach. He doesn't see you as your illness, rather a person with an illness that can come and go. He never puts limitations when you're feeling well unless you warn him otherwise. You swear Marvin is better than any doctor you've ever been to, since he recommends so many methods to ease your discomfort. He wants to stay well informed.

Frenchie wants to fix everything with food. It's how he shows his love. Especially if you have stomach issues, he'll stick to whatever diet or restrictions you need. He always some sort of extremely strong pain reliever that you only take when things get bad. He's always willing to listen to you and, of course, will accompany you to any doctors appointment. If you're in the hospital, he visits you every day. He makes it seem a lot less scary. Frenchie has a lot of pain from his scars and just life in general, so he completely understands when you're not up for something. He's extremely affectionate with his nicknames and never makes you feel bad for not being able to take part in missions. He loves nothing more than staying up and watching movies with you on especially painful days/nights. And he will defend you to anyone, especially friends and family, who say things like it's all in your head or it isn't that bad. Looooots of swearing at them in French, too.

Kimiko, like Frenchie, comes to your defense so fast is *almost* comical. Kimiko is signing angrily at ignorant doctors and friends who just don't understand, you or Frenchie translating for her. It really warms your heart. She is so gentle with you. She doesn't want to cause any more pain or harm than there already is. Whether it's a heating pad for your joints or a cool towel for your head, she places it so gently that you barely feel it. Kimiko loves the dark jokes you make about literally falling apart. It hurts her to see you in so much pain and discomfort. She asks you what it feels like so she can better understand. Because Kimiko heals so well, pain is different for her. She's always checking in with you, asking you how you're feeling. She doesn't make a big deal out of it, it's just regular small talk. You're thankful Kimiko makes it seem so normal whereas others would blow it out of proportion and make it this huge deal every time.

[mizgnomer]

Behind the Scenes of The Star Beast - Part Eight

Excerpts from Benjamin Cook's Star Beast Set Visit - discussing the Camden night shoots:

Is nobody here having a bad time?? WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM? "I had a little lull earlier," admits David, "at 2AM when we were waiting to turn over- I definitely yawned, maybe twice - but then the blood starts pumping again." Wrap isn't till 3AM. David lives across town. Isn't he worried he'll wake up his family when he gets in? "Listen, the kids are at Davison's," he says (this is Fifth Doctor actor Peter Davison, who happens to be David's father-in-law), "so I'm full of beans. Oh, and sugar. Do you want some?" He's bought a churro from a market stall that's stayed open because it's very much in shot. "You can have more than that." He breaks me off a bigger piece. "The sugar rush will do you good." He offers the director [ Rachel Talalay ] some too: "Go on, Rachel, you deserve it." "Are you doing OK?" she asks him. "Yeah! Sugar! I'll move on to the Yorkie bars next. I give not a fudge at this time in the morning." He claps his hands, dusting off the sugar from his churro. "But are you OK?" "I am at this moment," she says, waving to some fans. "Tomorrow at 4:30AM I might not be. Ask me again then." "You do get a lot of love from the fans, don't you?" says David. "In a tiny way, which is just lovely. I mean, I'm not you," she says, with a laugh. "I love hearing them scream for you. But I'm not used to any of this. And… I think it's stopped raining." "OK, here we go," says Scott. "Let's go for one. Stand by then, folks…" They go for another take. And another. When I catch up with Rachel later – much later, it’s October 2023, and she’s chatting over Zoom from her home in Vancouver – we’re five weeks away from The Star Beast airing on TV. “I didn’t know quite how well the episode was working,” she says, “till my family watched an almost-finished cut. I came downstairs, and my two girls were crying. It was like, oh, OK, this does work! And on a much, much deeper level too. To have them go, ‘We knew it would be full of joy’ – which I think it is – ‘but we didn’t expect it to be so emotional,’ that was very satisfying. It was an emotional time all round.” It was. In more ways than one. Which is something that Rachel wants to talk about – here in DWM – for the first time publicly. “I think I can now,” she says, “because I’m close to two years in remission. I will be this month. Two years in remission. And Doctor Who really helped heal me. Directing Doctor Who while I was only a couple of months post-chemo.” A deep breath. “I had lymphoma,” she explains. “I’d been in chemo for seven or eight months. I wasn’t sure if I was going to survive. Then I was offered The Star Beast. I thought, I’ve got to do this. I didn’t tell anybody I was sick. I hadn’t told anybody except very close family. And I didn’t tell anyone on Doctor Who till I was there long enough to say, ‘Look, I’m well enough, so I don’t want you worried about me.’ Because, frankly, I don’t know that they’d have wanted to hire someone who might not have made it through the shoot. I totally get that. That’s fair enough. [...] “I could not have been surrounded by a more supportive crew,” says Rachel. “The best crew in the world. When I realised, it’s all night shoots, I thought, oh god, and I’m two months post-chemo. But that crew – David especially – made those night shoots so fun. It’s weird now, because I look back at the pictures – like that lovely one of me and David you published last issue – and that was my chemo hair. I was just getting my hair back. But I got healthier and healthier, stronger and stronger, as the shoot went on. When I got back to Canada, the doctor said, ‘You’re a poster child for how well someone can do after chemo. This is what people are capable of.’ “But it’s just what you do,” she reflects, “isn’t it? – when you love Doctor Who in your heart so much. There was no better place for me than Doctor Who.”

Additional parts of this set are in the #whoBtsBeast tag. The full episode list is [ here ]

[jymwahuwu]

I can see Jing Yuan pulling off shits like "I haven't been inside my wife for a day I feel like I could get a mara struck😩"

It might be a joke, but to some officials it was serious. They are MORTIFIED.

So they make sure you, his darling, his wife, his lover, his everything, give him his daily cockwarming or even better, letting him fuck you every time he gets the chance. It became a common occurrence for Bailu to visit Jing Yuan's residence 2 or even 3 times a week because of how hard the general has been fucking you every day (hell, she might as well stay at the mansion).

The only time he will stop breeding your eggs out is when you are finally pregnant. He will become hapi hapi guy, willingly take the suppressant to suppress his libido so his baby won't get hurt if he were to fuck you during pregnancy. But in exchange for having your pussy no longer bullied, you will get nausea, back pain, and so many things altogether.

At least after the baby is born, the amount of times he needs to fuck you a day is reduced as now he likes to spend more of his time with his baby.

Yet be ready, when the baby is big enough to even go training with Yanqing, Jing Yuan will look at you and be like; "another baby?🥺"

-CW: yandere, dub-con, breeding, pregnancy, humiliation

Wait…it's so humiliating that the officials arranged for us to be fucked by Jing Yuan…I love this 😣😩🥺💦👉👈 Like you knew you were inevitably going to be creampied by Jing Yuan… but now you were being fucked for a greater good…?

Jing Yuan…maybe just jokingly complaining about not having you by his side - you, his destined, only spouse and lover. The seat of divine foresight cannot cease for a moment. Although the general does not have to decide or be present for everything, the workload is still a heavy and irresistible burden, like some tangled threads. Sometimes the general can only give you a holographic kiss on the forehead and go back to work. Once, after a meeting of high-level officials in Xianzhou, Jing Yuan had a faint smile on his lips as he listened to how the officials responded to people's mara and their greetings to the general. General sighed, shrugged and said.

"I haven't been inside my wife for a day I feel like I could get a mara struck😩"

The officials were shocked by Jing Yuan's outspokenness. Remembering how the general was rumored to be doting on and attached to his wife, they all avoided his eyes in embarrassment and changed the subject. After Jing Yuan left, they slowly realized that this was a serious matter related to Xianzhou's foundation. Jing Yuan is one of the seven Arbiter-Generals. If the general gets mara struck now, who else has the talent to succeed on Luofu? Fu Xuan is indeed talented, but She is still… young and not as experienced as him.

Generally speaking, as a general's wife, you are not supposed to be present at the seat of divine foresight while he is at work to avoid distracting him. But you…shouldn't you have such an obligation…? To comfort your husband?

You don't know when, but you find that you are often sent to the seat of divine foresight or teleported to any planet where Jing Yuan is located. You are like a little hamster that is soft, sweet, and can be carried around, put in the general's pocket. Sometimes he wants to be considerate and give you private space, but in the end he can't help but want to bury his head in your chest and rub it. Jing Yuan really can't let you leave.

The officials studied your schedule and it was all sorted. According to Xianzhou's time and calendar, there won't be a day that goes by that you don't get fucked by Jing Yuan's dick. If there is a schedule mistake, they are remiss.

How humiliating was it to be wheeled in front of the General to be fucked…? You may have your own ideals and hobbies, but these must be put behind the daily schedule of "warming your husband's cock." You stood aside uncomfortably, listening to Jing Yuan correcting documents and giving instructions to his assistants. Your private parts heat up due to the uneasy waiting, knowing what you will face after his work is temporarily over…

Sometimes, Jing Yuan just pretends not to care. With no change in your expression, the general grabbed you and pressed you against his cock to keep you warm for several hours, until you burst into tears uncontrollably, begging him to move even a little bit... What’s more, the general even had a special room, put you there, and tie your legs apart and lock your hands on the head of the bed. All you need to do is open your legs and wait for conception...Those balls press and slap against your swollen petals, loudly, cream swirling inside.

Bailu was too pure to understand what was happening. She just checks on you. She thought that pregnancy was about returning to Vidyadhara's egg or something.

Until…you are conceived, and a little life is growing inside you. Jing Yuan sometimes thinks about using artificial wombs or other technological alternatives. Witnessing your nausea and discomfort, Jing Yuan felt really uncomfortable and asked for leave to take care of you (even though he was the one who impregnated you…), but at the same time… Jing Yuan really wanted to taste the sweet milk flowing from your breasts. … He can only suppress his desires. He knows he has to be a responsible, trustworthy husband to you.

After the baby came into the world, both Jing Yuan and Yanqing were overjoyed. Their small palms wrapped around Yanqing's fingertips. They inherited that beautiful white hair, the most striking appearance feature, but some look like you. They waddle and explore the world with their palms outstretched. Looking at the baby, Yanqing and you, Jing Yuan's face shines with pride and happiness.

As your baby grows up, Jing Yuan ravages you less frequently… But don't forget that after Jing Yuan fell in love, he decided on the name of the third baby in the family. With earnest hope, he caressed you again. "Another baby…? 🥺"

At the same time, Jing Yuan's health report is as usual, even better than before, without any signs of mara. The plan worked.

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Josephine Baker (The Siren of the Tropics, ZouZou)— Josephine Baker was an American born actress, singer, and utter icon of the period, creating the 1920s banana skirt look. She was the first black woman to star in a major motion film. She fought in the French resistance in WWII, given a Legion of Honour, as well as refusing to perform in segregated theatres in the US. She was bisexual, a fighter, and overall an absolutely incredible woman as well as being extremely attractive.

Anne Baxter (The Ten Commandments, All About Eve)—her soft, gentle voice in "all about eve", those gentle eyes with something odd behind them, the way she flips from Sweet Innocent to Viper on a dime......there was something Built Different about anne baxter, man, and it makes her so good for playing people who are Built Wrong. also one of my favorite batmen villains (her joint episode w vincent price is a delight) and of course I'm obsessed with her columbo episode where she bosses around edith head and does fabulous movie star things for no good reason. and i would be REMISS if i didn't mention her slink—oh the slink—in the ten commandments...................pardon me i must go think of sinning again

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Josephine Baker:

Black, American-born, French dancer and singer. Phenomenal sensation, took music-halls by storm. Famous in the silent film era.

Let's talk La Revue Negre, Shuffle Along. The iconique banana outfit? But also getting a Croix de Guerre and full military honors at burial in Paris due to working with the Resistance.

She exuded sex, was a beautiful dancer, vivacious, and her silliness and humor added to her attractiveness. She looked just as good in drag too.

So I know she was more famous for other stuff than movies and her movies weren’t Hollywood but my first exposure to her was in her films so I’ve always thought of her as a film actress first and foremost. Also she was the first black woman to star in a major motion picture so I think that warrants an entry

Iconic! Just look up anything about her life. She was a fascinating woman.

Anne Baxter:

The prettiest murderer in that film. Just so beautifully evil as Nefertari.

Anne Baxter was part of my Bisexual Awakening. My family has a tradition that every Palm Sunday we watch The ten commandments on TV together... And starting from a very young age, I essentially developed a crushes on Anne Baxter's Nefertiri & Yul Brynner's Ramses. Dude, the woman was HOT! They both were! My crush definitely wasn't helped by the fact that Anne Baxter's costumes were a bit on the sheer side. She had a way of capturing you with her eyes, and I never understood why Charlton heston's Moses didn't just have a threesome with Nefertiri and Ramses. LOL

Her Nefertiri in The Ten Commandments was FORMATIVE TO ME. If not the hottest old movie lady, then she definitely played the hottest old movie character. if that makes sense.

Look. Listen. I only *just* discovered her on a post from the Have You Seen This Romcom poll blog. Saw she had the same last name as me and went OOH hi hello. Went to her IMdB and saw she was born in Indiana like moi. I am now even more intrigued. Been eagerly telling my partner this, and he was like "maybe you guys are distantly related?" And after 2 hrs of going down the tumblr tag + her imdb photos, I'm In Deep(tm) and I can't stop looking at her like 😍 When I go to my grandma's house, bet your ass I'm gonna check my grandpa's genealogy and see if we're somehow related. Sorry that's not really propaganda I just got real excited, esp when I saw that the submission deadline was extended (bless your soul). Narrowing down the movies where she's hottest in was Hell tyvm. I've only just discovered her, she looks gorgeous to me in every movie still I see of her gdi lol.

[erisweekofficial]

Today we're highlighting @acourtofladydeath, creator and mastermind behind @polyacotarweek. She's written so many amazing pieces about Eris across multiple ships and genres. And if you find yourself wanting to explore other characters, she's got you covered with her masterlist of 30+ works on AO3.

🧡 Looking for something deeply emotional and poignant? Please start with LD's favorite fic, All Things End (Azris). 🎧 It even has a playlist. 🎧

🔥 If you're looking for a good horny time, try Welcome to the Family, which features Elain x Eris or Rules are Rules (Azris). You're in for a good time with those two. Especially if you like Beron.

Read on to learn more about LD's writing process + some advice for writing about Eris...

What themes do you like to explore in your work with Eris?

I really enjoy exploring the juxtaposition and depth of Eris. He needs to act a certain way to protect the people he loves and keep his place within the Autumn Court under his father. But does he want to act that way? How soft is he, or is he actually as mean as he seems? I like when he's a bit of both. I think he's a very protective person, and I enjoy exploring the different ways that manifests with different people. I also think he's experienced a lot of trauma in his life, and I'd be remiss if I didn't say I enjoy exploring that and how it influences both his external and internal persona.

What other characters do you enjoy writing about alongside Eris?

Three favorites, three different relationships: My favorite person to ship Eris with is Azriel, and I love writing different iterations of their relationship. Some are softer, others are spicier, and then there's the really sad takes. There's so much give and take with these two and it's so fascinating to play around with. I love writing Eris and Nesta as best friends. Their wit is so well matched, as is their lived experiences with their siblings and parents. They have so much overlap, and you can write them funny or feeling and any combination in betwell. Plus, who says friends can't fuck? Not me. The third person is Lucien. I really enjoy exploring their familial relationships. Were they close as kids? If they hate each other, have they always? How does this relate to their relationships with their parents and other brothers? There's so many different ways to skin this cat and I want to write them all.

What's your favorite piece you've created featuring Eris and why?

I hemmed and hawed over this question forever, but I think the fic that fits best is "All Things End." This fic is pure bittersweet angsty sadness. What if Beron's torture gave Eris incurable dementia? How would his mate, Azriel, their children, and Lucien handle the situation? CW for dementia, death, and grief. I created two playlists for this fic: one that's a direct accompaniment and another that's an extended cut. The direct playlist is timed to the reading length of the fic, and specific songs play during specific scenes to enhance the reader experience (AKA bring more tissues).

Do you have any advice for other creators wanting to make eris content?

Eris is a character that we don't know much about compared to others in the series. When I go to write him I start with what we do know: his father's abuse, he's a general, he protected Lucien, we don't have the whole story about the Mor situation. He's cunning, so you know that what you see isn't all there is. I like to build backward. What from canon do I want to focus on? How does canon tie into whatever type of fic I'm writing? Why does he act the way he acts, and how does that tie into his canon history and the plot/theme/characterization of my fic? This helps build up the layers that are so integral to who I think Eris is as a character. Complex, captivating, keeps you on your toes. And don't forget his gold jewelry.

[heliza24]

Please allow me to brain dump all of my episode 5/devils minion thoughts/questions/predictions one more time before the episode comes out this weekend here. Only partially organized into something of a list:

- After the initial aborted interview, Armand is jealous that Daniel is able to connect to Louis in a way that he cannot, and he’s furious that Louis tells him about Lestat. He’s also just angry and frustrated. He’s been trying to make things up to Louis for thirty years, and their relationship has been strained for as long. And he takes it out on Daniel. I imagine the “is that was makes you fascinating?” Could easily be in response to Louis saying something like “I know I should have killed him, like we always kill the boys we sleep with, but he was just so fascinating that I didn’t want to.” And then all the jealousy that Armand has carefully stored away when Louis was imagining Lestat or choosing to sleep with another human rather than him just bubbles up to the surface.

- The more I think about it the more questions I have about Louis and Armand’s relationship (and their relationship to the absent Lestat) at this time. What caused Louis to want to do a first interview in the 70s? What happened between the 1973 and 2022 to change how he describes Lestat to Daniel so much? How and why do Louis and Daniel connect, and what does that mean for why they are repeating the interview in 2022? I am sometimes very guilty of having Armandaniel ship goggles on, I love them so so much together, and most of the further points on this list are from that lens. But I would be remiss to forget that Louis is the protagonist of this show, and that he has always been paralleled with Daniel narratively. So their connection is going to be really important, and i am also dying to understand it.

- Armand’s “I am the quiet you have been longing for” speech to Daniel is the equivalent of Santiago rooting around in his victim’s head before luring them into a willing death on stage. It’s seduction, but a seduction towards death. Armand is trying to peel Daniel apart in his anger. But somewhere along the line he gets too used to looking, too fascinated himself, to kill Daniel.

- I’m sure some of the initial anger at Daniel, and some of the initial anger at Louis, for humoring and connecting with him, has to do with Armand’s engrained respect for the great laws. Louis violates the law about not recording the history of the vampires, by talking to Daniel. He has revealed his true nature and let Daniel live, etc. part of me wonders if that’s why there’s that photo of Armand and Louis carrying Daniel when Louis is clearly being burned by doing it during the day. He made a mess, and his punishment is to do the dirty work of cleaning it up, even if Armand could take care of Daniel quickly on his own if he wanted to. I presume that eventually Armand ends up breaking rules himself around Daniel (not killing him, chiefly) which makes the forbidden aspect of their relationship all the more interesting to me.

- The two examples we have so far of Armand peering into Daniel’s memories (selling porn magazines and sleeping with a girl only if she would cover her face) speak to a combination of sexual shame, cruelty, repression, and desperation. There is something prompting Danny to sell those magazines, whether it be poverty or some hidden trauma. And Armand is familiar with that kind of relationship to sexuality. There might also be something about Daniel’s sexual brashness, as complicated as that might actually be, that feels refreshing after decades of Louis’s simmering resentment. There’s also a similarity between these early Daniel facts and Louis pulling the knife on Paul. It demonstrates a vampire-compatible personality (a certain viciousness combined with certain type of shame) while they’re both still human. And I’m sure that is fascinating to Armand.

- I’m also hoping that we’ll learn a little bit about Daniel’s childhood or backstory. I do feel like he has to be already running from something by the time he meets the vampires. He’s self medicating for sure, and I want to know why. Whenever I write about Daniel in fic I always end up coming back to his relationship to women and mothers/daughters, maybe because his daughters that he doesn’t speak to anymore in 2022 seem to loom large in absentia to me in the Dubai version of his character (especially in the ways they echo with Claudia). His disavowal of his queerness and kind of casual acceptance of the fact that he was a shitty husband does the same thing. The casual cruelty and misogyny of the bag over the head story reinforces this to me. I would love to learn more about this side of Danny, not because I think it’s a particularly good part of him, but because it’s a thing I think we’re missing in our understanding of him. It makes him grey in the same way the vampires are grey, in the same way Louis was grey before he was turned, and I want to understand it better.

- I think Louis begs Armand to stop torturing Daniel; whether or not he and Daniel actually hook up (and I kind hope they do!) I think Louis genuinely likes him. But Armand either refuses or continues to chase/torture/fall in love with Daniel behind Louis’s back. I’m not positive this is what the show is going to do, but I think it would work so well to have Daniel basically be an affair during Louis and Armand’s marriage. that information imbalance would make the drama in the penthouse more dynamic, and I think it would make sense that Armand would be looking for some kind of release, something that was just his, while he was trying to manage Louis’s moods and continued attachment to Lestat.

- I have a kind of more structural question as well, which is- how much they are gonna show us in this episode? Just from a character arc perspective, I don’t think they can end season 2 without Daniel knowing exactly why his memories were erased. That’s his dramatic question; not just what happened to me, but why do I not remember (and what does that mean for me now)? So I suspect that if we only see the first part of Devil’s minion in this episode, the torture and the stalking maybe, but we don’t get to the point where Daniel’s memories are erased, then there will be future revelations in the later episodes about happened in the 1970s. I am also wondering if the episode will be akin to a bottle episode, at least in the San Francisco section, set all over the same night in the same location. This is very play-like, so it would not surprise me if the writers room full of playwrights wrote it this way. And we’ve also only seen images and clips from the one location and the one set of costumes. If that’s the case, and we learn why Daniel’s memories were erased in this episode, that means his interaction with the vampires was actually pretty short lived, and any deeper devil’s minion stuff is gonna happen in the Dubai era if it happens at all. Because of that I either hope that the episode is less of a bottle episode than we’ve been led to believe, or that the bottle episode is only the start of a longer interaction between Daniel and Armand.

- To me Armand is like a dragon, who has been taught through repeated trauma that the only way to get what he wants is to roll over and show his vulnerable belly. Thats his dynamic with Louis; he grants him control even though he is the more powerful one because he wants to keep Louis. But Armand comes in like the monster he is to Daniel, and the fact that Daniel ends up liking him anyway, and doesn’t ask him to dim his power or appear more human or more gentle, is what makes their connection special. That’s what makes generally terrifying Danny early on necessary, the idea that he sees the absolute worst of Armand and is still somehow interested. I hope we can get to the point in this season where Daniel can articulate how attracted he is to Armand’s monstrosity. Based on the critic’s reactions I guess we’re not getting that this episode? But I live in hope that we’ll get that sentiment somehow before the season ends.

- Part of me is scared that the critics who believe that nothing romantic is going on between Daniel and Armand are somehow correct. Like, maybe we just aren’t gonna see any of that at all this season. Maybe if they have a romance at all it will just be in the Dubai timeline somewhere down the road. But then I remember the way Assad plays Armand around Daniel, and the way that he has jumped to Daniel’s aid twice (once in season 1 and once in season 2), and the “Alice wanted to say yes when you proposed but you hadn’t given her a reason to trust you” comment, which to me so clearly reads as Armand talking about himself. Surely those things don’t mean nothing.

- I love the idea that if Daniel and Armand were having an affair, Daniel asking to be turned and made into Armand’s companion would involve Armand leaving Louis, or at least breaking his trust further. That would be a huge leap for Armand because of the ways that he’s committed to and indebted to Louis because of what happened in Paris, and it makes sense to me that he wouldn’t be able to make that leap. Especially if Daniel’s addiction issues ends up transferring to vampire blood. The question of “do you really love me or do you just want to drink from me?” Is such a great doubt for a vampire to have, and I can see it really plaguing Armand, enough for him to not want to turn Daniel. I also hope we get him just in general not wanting to make fledglings because it feels like passing on a curse, and wanting to protect Daniel from the hellish parts of vampire existence by keeping him human. (I wonder if we’ll also see some kind of evolution in Louis and Armand’s relationship that will make it easier for Armand to recommit to Louis. Some kind of demonstration by Louis that he would pick Armand over Lestat if he had a choice? Something else? I’m not sure).

- I do think Daniel asking for the memory wipe himself is the most dramatically satisfying way for it to happen. Daniel being desperate for immortality, and despondent at the fact that Armand won’t turn him, and choosing to forget him instead is just so good. Especially if Armand acquiesces because he can see that his and Daniel’s connection is hurting Daniel and affecting Daniel’s mental health. It would fit with the way that Armand puts all of his partners before himself, because Armand would erase Daniel’s memory to save him, at the expense of his own broken heart. And that broken heart would explain the vacillating coldness and bitterness and affection he treats Daniel with in Dubai. And it would be an incredibly difficult realization for Dubai Daniel to have, that the person he initially thought was a monster because he committed this violation of his mind actually did so at Daniel’s own behest. This would fit with something that Eric mentioned in an interview, that Daniel realizes that he has fucked up two marriages because of the things that went down with the vampires that he cannot remember. What if the reason he could never be happily married was that he was never fully over Armand, even if he didn’t realize it? Heartbreaking. Juicy. The stuff of good drama! This is the other reason I keep reassuring myself that something romantic did happen between Daniel and Armand in the past. It changes the Dubai dynamics in ways that are simply too rich to ignore.

- I also do suspect that season 2 is gonna end with modern day Louis and Lestat being reunited. Lestat has to be around to narrate season 3 after all, and we have that tiny clip of the Loustat hug that feels modern. I’m really excited about that! But my heart breaks for Armand in that case, and I just… really hope that Daniel could be Armand’s safe place to land if Louis ends up leaving him at the end of the season.

[iamhollywood]

I want to talk about Jesse's possum story from Fly. most of this is just word vomit from my notes so it might not 100% make sense just bear with me here.

We know Jesse's aunt Ginny died of cancer. It's not really discussed much in the show, but it seems to have affected him quite a lot, especially in his relationship with Walt. In Fly, Jesse is particularly thrown off by Walt’s sudden obsession with the fly because of how much it mirrors Ginny’s reaction to the possum (“Scrabble”). In both cases, a person Jesse looks up to, who has a tentative health condition, is being driven mad by an animal trapped in an enclosed space. Both of them are desperately trying to regain control over a situation where they have none – for Ginny, this is her cancer, for Walt, this is his life of crime – and going to more and more extreme lengths to do so. 

Eventually we find out that Ginny’s obsession was caused by brain cancer. This does two things. First, it leaves us to wonder what’s wrong with Walt – what’s causing him to act like this? His cancer is in remission, so it can’t be (or probably isn’t) brain cancer. This question is answered later, in the scene where Jesse kills the fly. Walter is experiencing guilt and regret for the first time in the show. He very rarely experiences remorse, so of course this version of him is alien both to us and to Jesse. By the end of the episode, the fly, symbolising Walter’s guilt, is killed, and he returns to normal.

Second, it gives us insight into Jesse’s emotional state. His trauma from his aunt’s death is being triggered, which is why he acts how he does in Fly. Ginny died when he was much younger and had no experience of such a situation, which rendered him powerless to react. Now that he is older, he sees the same situation playing out in front of him and is desperate to change it. He tries to help Walter, by trying to kill the fly, and by drugging him to sleep (the drugging also mirrors how Ginny was given antipsychotics). He is both trying to resolve the situation and soothe the pain it is causing.

All in all, I really like this scene for what it symbolises and how it gives us an insight into Jesse’s past experiences of cancer and how they affect his interactions with Walt. I feel like Aunt Ginny isn’t really explored that much but she really does have a massive impact on this part of the show. And despite what Walt says, there IS a discernible point to this story :)

[stu-dyingstudent]

third war continued/Sakura sent to war prematurely fic recs

Okay, I'll be completely honest, this is one of my ultimate favourite tropes when it comes to Sakura-centric fanfiction! Unfortunately, there really isn't too many of these out there and most are not completed, so if you know of any more then please send them my way. I'm begging.

Started: 2024.07.23

Last Updated: 2024.11.28

note: feel free to check out my master list which has a bunch of Sakura Haruno fic recs (all organized)!

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Your Move, Instigator (draw your weapon and hold your tongue) - Laysan_albatross || ao3|| third war extended AU || complete

“We are still under wartime policy,” the recruiter had told her parents. He had an envelope in his hand. He sounded sorry. “She has two parents who are successful ninjas. We would be remiss to overlook her potential based upon that alone.” The Third Shinobi War never ended. Konoha needs more soldiers, grabbing anyone who can fight, especially those who can't say no.

You guys, I love this one to death. It's definitely a darker take on the Naruto universe, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. The civilian born shinobi are deemed as more expendable and thus thrown into war while the clan born remain sheltered. I found it quite interesting that the Uchiha were also lobbed into this group, but it was more done as punishment instead. Very raw and properly gets across the devastation that this brings.

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still waters by Vulpecula_et_Anser || ao3 || gen || M || Sakura sent to war early AU || one-shot complete

Sakura is twelve when she queues up in front a desk with a bunch of other equally-terrified looking shinobi. The ages range from younger than her to old enough to be her grandpa. The man sitting at the desk is stony-faced as he doles out assignments. Sakura obediently shuffles forward when it is her turn, and recites her shinobi identification number in a shaky voice when asked. When the provost marshal looks at her, looks down at his paper, looks back at her, and grimaces, Sakura knows it’s not going to be good. OR How Sakura survives the war, told in bits and pieces.

Canon-fodder! Sakura makes her shinobi debut on the front lines, forcing her to get creative in her means to survive. It's gritty, raw, and the clever use of seals is great! In most of the other works of this type, Sakura is placed on a team of sorts or has some "support" (kinda), but here she is all alone. She is forced to fight for her life, to keep going despite how she feels because ultimately, Sakura does not want to die. She does meet some people later on though and it was great to see. Y'all know this type of story is my personal guilty pleasure (also one of the best I've read thus far)...

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Find Your Place (whatever it takes) - Dovey || ao3 || third war extended AU || incomplete

The war lasts longer than in canon, and has only just ended. While most of the 'Konoha 12' are clan heirs and thus protected from having to go to war prematurely, Sakura is from a civilian family, with naturally advanced chakra control, and thus is thrown immediately onto the frontlines. Now she's on a genin team in peacetime, and she's struggling to figure out how to live when she's not constantly at risk of dying. Team seven bonds in new weird ways, The Uchiha are actually all dead except for Sasuke (including war-hero itachi) who's got a chip on his shoulder the size of Konoha, Naruto isn't the kyuubi container and he finds Sakura kinda scary. Sakura would just like to have a hobby.

Find Your Place (whatever it takes) is the og fic of this category as far as I am aware. The main difference to consider is that it primarily focuses on the aftereffects of the war and the impact that it had on Sakura as a person.

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team. - waterpllar || ao3 || gen || third war extended AU || complete

She’s under Neji's command, which apparently means she’s under the Hyuuga’s command. The Hyuuga’s role is on the frontlines, but Neji must be special for a kid from the branch family, because they mostly send him and Sakura out after the big battles are done, to pick off the wounded, and burn bodies. Sakura kind of wishes she had someone to keep her from the big fights, too. Her job is with Neji, taking back kekkei genkai and retrieving important people’s bodies, but she has other assignments, too. She’s given a dull kunai and told to go through the battlefield, dodging blows and jutsus from friend and foe, slashing at whatever isn’t wearing a Konoha headband.(the third shinobi war doesn't end, dragging on for years. konoha is running out of troops, and unimportant children in the academy with even a modicum of talent are snatched up to the warfront. sakura, unfortunately, is one of them. so is neji.)

Such a strong beginning, although, I gotta say that the ending was rather disappointing imo. There was so much potential, but the author admitted to not wanting to continue the story so it was cut short. Hopefully more works of this nature will come to light!

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Induction - Anonymous || ao3 || M || gen || third war extended AU || incomplete

in·duc·tion /inˈdəkSH(ə)n/ noun: induction 1. the action or process of inducting someone to a position or organization. enlistment into military service.   or; The Third War does not end soon enough. Children pay the price.

Definitely not my favorite take on this trope, but it fits the bill, so it's here! Anyway, tbh I never actually made it far enough reading to get to the actual war part, so I don't have too much to say.

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Ground Zero - TheIzzatron || ao3 || gen || T || third war extended AU || incomplete

Desperate times call for desperate measures. If this means forcing weapons into the hands of children, then so be it.

AHHHHH I'm praying for the day we get another chapter of Ground Zero!! I really appreciate how we actually get a training arc where we get a base of the characters and how this system works before they properly get dispatched. The characters and their emotions are so well done that you truly feel how unfair the situation is. They aren't heartless, they are children. Highly recommend.

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Control - Dragonist || ao3 || gen || no rating || Sakura sent to war early AU || incomplete

Kumo kidnaps a child of Konoha. Sakura graduates from the academy only a year after starting it. There's a war going on, and she's obedient enough to stay quiet and follow orders. Then the war ends, and it's unclear who is really giving them. (a mystery from a child's perspective)

I haven't read Control yet, but I really need to get around to it!

Ok I just noticed I forgot to add the link to this one, but that has been fixed!!

Edit: bruh, I’m so mad I didn’t get around to reading this sooner because it seems the author deleted it 😭 if any of you have a link/download, please send (I’m begging)

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The War ate me and spat me back out - Faircrown || ao3 || gen || E || third war extended AU || one-shot complete

She was a child for a whole six years of her life before being forced to graduate early on and thrown into the war.

Sakura graduates early and is sent to war. On all of her placements she has been one of the only survivors to come out.

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your war heroes (are my war criminals) - silentpoints || ao3 || gen || E || third war extended AU || incomplete

A girl who was supposed to die young survives to see adulthood, and thus the Third Shinobi World War rages onwards with the odds stacked against Konoha.  Sakura, on the other hand, is one of the many children placed in the Academy's new "Accelerated Program" under the reign of the Yondaime Hokage, who is a man that cannot possibly be human—and she grows up to be really fucking angry, waging her own war against Namikaze Minato.

The fic isn't quite long enough for the story to have properly gotten going. Therefore, I don't really have any comments.

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The spines of trees we take for dead - FacelesssMoon || ao3 || gen || T || Sakura sent to war early AU || one-shot complete

Haruno Sakura is not special. A war goes on. She does not feel special. They tell her she is. She likes to lie.

Sakura it sent to war at a young age with the justification that she is "special." It is there she meets Minato and Kakashi and chooses to stick by their sides. Pretty short if you want something quick.

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Please send me more like these!!!!

[liquidstar]

I'd also be remiss not to mention the ending tease for round 6!!! It's Ivan VS Till time

What's interesting is that Till is clearly staring at the Mizi VS Luka match, but the picture he punches is his own. Maybe he blames himself for not saving her, maybe he's angry at himself... Does he still want to win? Is he more determined than ever, or is he giving up? I need to know his mindset

And Ivan too, I mean, I'm sure he's all sorts of messed up about the fact that he's going to have to compete against the guy he's in love with... Again I wonder what his mindset is. Does he intend to lose anyway? Or maybe he's also plotting, given that one promo image of him Skeptically looking at Mizi's missing picture. Maybe he expects something to happen anyway, or maybe he's inspired to finally do something himself.

But the thing that made Ivan fall in love with Till was his rebelliousness, it reminded him of the freedom he saw in the falling stars, a light that broke through his hopelessness (his black sorrrowwww). If Till IS giving in to some sort of despair then would Ivan seek to reignite that flame at his own expense? Or if Till is fully determined, is Ivan happy to just watch that spark burn as he sings with him for the last time? Or maybe he doesn't intend to lose despite everything, but I can't see Ivan putting himself in front of Till at all... But I can see him finally being inspired to act on his own, for once, his own rebellion.

At the end of the day though I'm just talking about their mindsets going into it, thinking it'll be to the death. Because we know as the audience that Mizi and Hyuna are on their way to fuck shit up and hopefully free them (maybe the world that Ivan and Till saw on that one night under the meteors can finally open up to them, now that Mizi is out too)

And I also wonder if Mizi wanted to go specifically because those are her friends. The girl that she loved with all her heart, the one she called her universe and her God, is already dead. We saw her grief in MiziSua and we see her resolve now. Beyond getting any sort of revenge on Luka or Alien Stage itself, I think Mizi wants to keep the friends she has left alive.

[thedeviltohisangel]

John and Cass spicy pregnancy thoughts and headcanons? 👀

FEEL FREE TO SEND IN ANY YOU THINK I MISSED!

sort of nsfw under the cut

-John's obsession with her boobs

-Rubbing her belly with lotion becoming a full body massage

-Cass most definitely is waking him up at all hours of the night because she is horny for him and he is always obliging

-The way she looks at him holding their baby and is immediately asking him for another one

-Just the straight up body worship that man is going to participate in of his wife

-He is so smug that he is having a baby with the most beautiful woman on the planet and will always be kissing her and having a hand on that belly

-I would also imagine the amount of oral sex they are having sky rockets into another stratosphere

-John giving her a nice, slow, soft sponge bath

-@karasnonsense99 and I have discussed John cradling her belly during doggy

-I've also discussed with Kara that John teaches Cass the beauty of sitting on top of the washing machine while it runs so I can imagine if things get a little sensitive during her pregnancy, that is where she goes to get some relief

-At some point they probably have a sex marathon to try and induce labor

-Does John have a breeding kink? Probably

-The amount of dirty jokes he will make about also loving her boobs whenever the babies are rooting around her nipple

-Imagine how sweet and caring he is their first time having sex after birth and he's moving so slow and whispering so many affirmations and just holding her the entire time as they learn each other's bodies all over again

-I also like the image of pregnant Cass at a picnic locking eyes with him while she licks a popsicle and everyone just groans and reminds themselves that is exactly how baby Egan was probably conceived in the first place

-She definitely overheats a lot so John is always trying to tame his hard on for her flushed and sweaty skin and especially when she starts sleeping naked and clinging to him like a koala. His morning wood is going to be insane

-And it's one of my biggest headcanons that seeing John as a dad is the biggest turn on for Cass ever. And John doesn't even know what he is doing but he knows his wife likes it and that she is climbing him like a tree so often he can't even keep up anymore

-I would be remiss to not mention handyman John. Building cribs? Bookshelves? Fixing their toys? Cass is just drooling the entire fucking time and has to physically restrain herself to allow her to let him finish (iykyk @gloryofroses19) and more often than not him fixing something leads to the two of them breaking something else

[mistigrisunshine]

spuffy fic rec

part 1 - part 2 - part 3

(Unintended) You Could Be by ashcrashed [14k]

No, she hadn’t lost her mind. Because the reasons that made Spike the actual worst also made him the right one for the job.

Domino Effect by Anaross [15k]

Spike slips away unnoticed after Angel gives Buffy the amulet that might help in the final battle and runs directly into a tearful Buffy with a message from the future. AU after End of Days.

Monky Business by Girlytek [18k]

Retconning Dawn is harder than it looks.

In Remission by Quinara [19k]

In the five years Spike's been missing, the world around Buffy has irrevocably changed. The general population has woken up to vampires' existence and the kill count has dropped way down. She's sharing a house with a soulless vampire, still going by the name of Faith. But what does Spike have to do with it? And what does it mean for their future?

Devouring Time by Sigyn [20k]

An apocalypse has ravaged the world. Buffy has lost her friends, and her beloved Spike, and wants nothing more than to die, to rest, but immortality denies her that chance. With nothing more than her scythe and a hint of possibility, she seeks out a goddess of time, who offers her the chance to enter a universe of her own past, to choose a champion and save the world. Buffy knows who she would choose. But how can this Spike, paralyzed, filled with rage, and still in love with Drusilla, possibly be a champion for life, for light, and for the slayer he hates? Only time will tell.

Bring On Christmastime by bewildered [21k]

Welcome, Gentle Readers! Have you ever wondered the true meaning of Christmas? I know I have. But never fear, I, Andrew Wells -- having been privileged to bear witness to a Christmas miracle, in this the year Anno Domini Two Thousand and Two -- shall now share with you the answer, a tale that will warm the cockles of your cold, cold heart and fill you to the brim with tingly, pepperminty Christmas spirit.

There's something about Anne by Frillyria [44k]

Anne is just a regular girl until a not-so-regular boy gets a hold of her - she is thrown into a life outside her control, and has to do what she can to survive - and to choose hope over fear and distrust.

nothing safe is worth the drive (follow you home) by SummerFrost [61k]

Here's the deal: Buffy's got no idea how to beat Glory, or how they're gonna book it across the country in a moldy RV without anyone killing each other, especially now that someone broke one of the beds—and the thought of going home again kinda makes her wanna cry. The one thing she knows is that Spike would follow her anywhere, even like this.

The Key is Donnie Summers by Girlytek [121k]

Response to tempestt's challenge, what if Dawn were Donnie, if the monks had created a brother for Buffy instead of a sister? --complete through Season 5--

Liebestod by Iamblichus [149k]

They really should have known the First Evil wasn't done with them after Sunnydale… Enter: Time-travel, mysterious prophesies, and lots of poetry. BtVS Post-Season 7; Angel AU Season 5. All's well that ends well.

[herbs-and-poultices]

It was fun last year, as far as I know no-one has tried to have me burned for heresy, I could use a fun diversion right about now, and I haven't yet run out of ballads. So here is this year's:

Vaguely Whumptober-Themed Anthology of Folk Songs from the British Isles / Transatlantic Tradition: Part 1

(What’s a random American gal with no English/Scottish/Irish heritage doing listening mostly to songs like these? Blame my parents for raising me on murder ballads and ceilidh tunes.)

1) If only we could hold on: White Squall (X)

A Folk Revival (20th c) composition from closer to home.

I clung there to the stanchions and I felt my face go pale As he crawled hand over hand along the rail I could feel her keeling over with the fury of the blow I watched the rail go under then, so terrible and slow Then like some great dog she shook herself and roared upright again Far overside, I heard him call my name

2) You got away with the crime while the knife's in my back: Dowie Dens of Yarrow (X X)

An old traditional ballad.

A humble ploughman braves mortal combat with nine high-born rivals for the hand of the lady he loves. He wins, only for her brother to stab him in the back. Literally

3) Wrongfully Arrested: Long Black Veil (X) / Over the Hills (X)

An American country ballad and a Celtic rock/metal ballad (covered on hurdy-gurdy!!) which share enough similarities to have come from the same centuries-old traditional ballad. They are both actually original compositions, but the genres owe much to the old tradition.

Ten years ago, on a cold, dark night Someone was killed 'neath the town hall light There were few at the scene, but they all agreed That the slayer who ran looked a lot like me

4) Hallucinations (visions): MacCrimmon's Lament (X)

A haunting tune from the 1745 Jacobite Rising. Stretching the prompt a bit, but for a good cause ;)

A lament for the death of the piper Donald Bán MacCrimmon, sole casualty of the Rout of Moy. It is said that the tune was composed by Donald Bán himself following a premonition of his own death. Lyrics were written later, in Gaelic, Scots, and English.

5) Healing Salve: Witch of the West-Mer-Land (X X)

A Folk Revival (20th c) composition with much the feel of an old trad ballad.

A mortally wounded knight seeks the aid of an enchantress, who tends his wounds with a combination of herbs and magic, saving his life.

6) It's not (my) blood: The Douglas Tragedy (X)

An old traditional ballad.

He lichted doon tae tak’ a drink o’ the water that ran sae clear An’ doon the stream ran his hairt’s blood, and sair she began tae fear 'Rise up, rise up, Lord William,' she said, 'for I fear ye are slain' '’Tis naethin’ but the shadow of my scarlet coat that shines in the water sae plain'

This is the type of family strife / star-crossed lovers ballad that ends badly for all involved. And I do mean all.

7) It's us or them: Henry Martin (X)

An old traditional ballad.

A desperate young man's first attempt at piracy does not go as hoped, when his quarry refuses to surrender. After hours of fighting, he ultimately sinks his would-be prize outright -- perhaps as the only way to save his own ship and crew.

8) Forced to Stay Awake: Captain Coulston (X)

A broadside (19th c) emigrant ballad.

He said my boys do not go down, you need not think on sleep For in a few hours more we shall be slumbering in the deep For a pirate ship is coming down upon the western sea To rob us of our property going to Amerikay

9) Obsession | Frame me up on the wall, just to keep me out of trouble: Lily of the West (X X)

A broadside (19th c) murder ballad with versions on both sides of the Atlantic.

An unreasonably jealous young man with a deadly weapon and a remarkable inability to take responsibility for his own actions. What could possibly go wrong.

10) Blow to the head: Follow Me Up To Carlow (X)

An Irish rebel song. I would be remiss if I didn't include at least one.

White is sick and Grey has fled, now for black Fitz William's head We'll send it over dripping red to Lizzy and her ladies

11) Loneliness | No trace: Lament of the Fisherman's Wife (X)

A Folk Revival (20th c) composition, but a tale as old as time.

Now she has come down to condemn that wild ocean For the murderous loss of her man His boat sailed out on Wednesday morning And it's feared she's gone down with all hands

12) Starvation: The New York Trader (X)

A broadside (19th c) - or possibly older traditional - emigrant ballad.

Our cruel captain as we did find Left half of our provisions behind Our cruel captain, you'll understand Meant to starve us all before we reached the land

13) Multiple whumpees | "Death will do us part": Lord Thomas and Fair Elender (X X)

An old traditional ballad found on both sides of the Atlantic.

At his parents' urging, a young man marries for wealth rather than love. (Or the conventional racist beauty standards of the time -- elements of this tale are very dated.) The wedding ends in a murder and a murder-suicide.

14) Hunting Gear: Van Dieman's Land (X)

A transportation ballad. Gotta have one of those too.

Come all you gallant poachers that ramble void of care That walk out on a moonlight night with your dog, your gun and snare The harmless hare and pheasant you have at your command Not thinking of your last career out on Van Diemen’s Land

15) Painful Hug: Young Hunting (X) / Love Henry (X)

An old traditional ballad with versions on both sides of the Atlantic.

Another jealous murder, with a twist.

He bent down o’er his saddle bow To kiss her ruby cheek, But she took out a little pen-knife And wounded him full deep