#but if i get the first joke no one else does

[bytemee]

mean!sorority!karina x loser!gp!reader headcannons? 🙂‍↕️

WORST BEHAVIOR — yu jimin headcannons.

read the one shot here!

pairings. mean!sorority!karina x loser!gp!reader

warning(s). pet names (karina calling u puppy), jealous & possessive!karina, let me know if there’s more

words. 802

authors note. this is the first time i EVER did headcannons… got too lazy to add nsfw ones though 😞

mean!sorority!karina who calls you ‘puppy’ more than your actual name because, in her eyes, that’s exactly what you are—her pathetic, obedient little lapdog.

mean!sorority!karina who keeps you on a short leash. you’re not allowed to talk to certain people, go to certain parties without her knowing, or—god forbid—ignore her texts. if you take too long to respond, she’ll send a follow-up: “puppy? don’t make me come find you.”

mean!sorority!karina who loves making you flustered. she’ll drag her fingers along your jaw, trace her nails down your arms, lean in as if she’s going to kiss you—only to pull away at the last second and laugh.

mean!sorority!karina who got possessive without realizing it. she still made fun of you relentlessly, but the moment someone else tried? her tone turned cold. “i didn’t say you could talk to them.”

mean!sorority!karina who bullies you in public, but gets territorial in private. if someone else messes with you? suddenly, she’s not amused.

mean!sorority!karina who hated how much she noticed you. the way your ears turned red when she got too close. how you always showed up when she needed you, no matter how ridiculous her request was.

mean!sorority!karina who would never admit she liked you first. instead, she’d just scoff, roll her eyes, and mutter, “ugh. why do you have to be so pathetic?” as if it was your fault she was falling.

mean!sorority!karina who is the most demanding, impatient person ever. she wants kisses when she wants them, and nothing is going to stop her from getting what she wants—not even you.

mean!sorority!karina who tries to hide it, but her heart melts when you do cute things. when you offer her the last cookie, or tell her she looks nice in a dress, or hold the door open for her.

mean!sorority!karina who doesn’t know how to express her feelings properly. so, when she says, “you’re so annoying,” or, “you’re lucky i tolerate you,” or, “it’s not that i like you or anything,”—you know it really means, “i love you.”

mean!sorority!karina who acts like she’s doing you a favor by letting you be around her. “you should be grateful, puppy. not everyone gets to be my personal lapdog.” but the truth is, she’d probably go insane if you ever actually left.

mean!sorority!karina who gets jealous so easily, it’s ridiculous. she’ll roll her eyes and act uninterested, but if she catches you laughing a little too hard at someone else’s joke? she’s suddenly in your space, hands on your collar, whispering, “what’s so funny? care to share with the class?”

mean!sorority!karina who uses her nails to tease you constantly. she loves the way you freeze up when she drags them down your arm or across the back of your neck. and she always does it when she knows you can’t react—like in public or in front of her friends.

mean!sorority!karina who finds excuses to touch you, even when she doesn’t have to. adjusting your hoodie strings, fixing your hair, pulling you close by your belt loop just to whisper something unnecessary. she’s addicted to how easily she can fluster you.

mean!sorority!karina who says she doesn’t do relationships, but somehow, you’re different. she doesn’t know when it happened, but suddenly, she’s only interested in you. and when someone asks if you two are a thing, she just scoffs and says, “she’s just my pup. i keep her around.”

mean!sorority!karina who would act like she doesn’t care, but if you ever tried to leave? if you ever pulled away from her, even slightly—suddenly, she’s not so nonchalant anymore.

mean!sorority!karina who will corner you at a party, arms crossed, voice deceptively calm. “what’s this i hear about you ignoring me, puppy?” and if you try to play dumb, her lips curve into a smirk that doesn’t reach her eyes. “don’t test me.”

mean!sorority!karina who will scoff, roll her eyes, and mutter, “fine. go.” if you ever seriously consider walking away. but the second you actually turn your back, she’s grabbing your wrist, yanking you close, and whispering, “you think you can just leave me?”

mean!sorority!karina who won’t beg, won’t admit she’s scared, but if you ever really push her—if you tell her you’re done, that she can’t keep stringing you along—her mask finally cracks. her voice will drop as she mutters, “you don’t get it, do you? you’re mine, puppy.”

mean!sorority!karina who is terrified you’ll realize that somewhere along the way, she became yours, too.

[cherie-doll]

Okay great! Glad I cleared it w/ you first ^^

Could you please write the COD guys reacting to seeing his military crush bite an enemy in the throat, because somehow said enemy snuck up on them and, well, there wasn't much else they could do besides that, except like, die

So of course they chose to bite a guy to death, and he saw all of that

Is it #truelove or #ohmygodwhatwasthatgrossss 😭 /j

yk what's funny, i wrote a draft for this and turns out i never saved it... so here we go again

𖧧 Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Rudy, Phillip Graves, Makarov, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto

ᵎ Price had always thought of you as an admirable and exemplary soldier who always completed missions with efficiency. He never questioned how your methos for completing those missions... until now. A cry was about to leave his lips when he saw the enemy sneaking up behind you, until he stood watching in shock as you responded quickly by biting into their neck.

ᵎ Simon could have thought of other... methods that you could have used when taken by surprise. Sure, he's seen unspeakable war crimes but this has got to be one of those top ten moments on his list of things he wishes to NEVER witness ever again. Let's just say the ride back was dead silent.

ᵎ Soap would have such a big, fat crush on you there isn't anything you do that wouldn't look attractive to him. You've done a number of things and he would just kick his feet and giggle to himself. Seeing you sink your teeth into the enemy's throat with agility only made him experience an initial shock before thinking, "wow, they're so resourceful".

ᵎ Kyle could see why you would do something like that but... why? Just why? You have a weapon, he was covering for you and was it really easier to go rabid on someone rather than pull your knife out? He didn't know you had that side to you.

ᵎ Roach is scared. He's running; he fears he might be next if you confuse him for the enemy. He stood aghast for a moment before booking it out of there.

ᵎ Alejandro is lowkey into that. He had been observing you, watching your moves to see how you would perform out in the field. He's heard so much about how quick your reflexes are when it comes to combat but he surely didn't expect this. He likes 'em a little crazy anyways.

ᵎ Rudy made the mistake of assuming you wouldn't react in time. He had pulled out his weapon and aimed at the enemy who was attacking you now, he heard the shot on his end and then paused for a moment. He saw two figures still on the ground, until you got up, blood dripping down your chin and for a moment he assumed the worst; that he had aimed incorrectly and hit you instead. Until he saw the bitemarks on the enemy's neck.

ᵎ Phillip is usually proud of whatever his Shadows do to eliminate the enemy. He doesn't care how they do it so long as the job is done. He's yelling over the comm what a great job you did until he hears... questionable sounds? The sound of choking, ok so he thinks you choked the enemy out until another shadow responds saying you just bit someone and the gurgling sounds was the enemy choking on their own blood. Well...

ᵎ Makarov would sort of just laugh. He's never seen you panic so much in a moment where you don't even know what to do and act on whatever idea comes into your mind first.

ᵎ Keegan was beyond weirded out. When he had told you to learn from Riley he didn't mean for you to also take out the enemy soldiers by ripping their vocal chords out, he had meant it mostly as a joke that even the dog had better skills than you.

ᵎ König does not know how to react, how he should react. He is mainly concerned and hopes this doesn't become a habit. Perhaps he should suggest you visit a doctor? Ah, for your... teeth. Yep, that's exactly why. Not to get a mental checkup too while you're at it.

ᵎ Horangi is off the rails himself, he is no stable man to judge how you take someone out. He did give you the advice to fight with everything and anything. He was only trying to teach the new rookie he had a little crush on how to survive out there. And boy was he amused to see you take that advice.

ᵎ Nikto has killed a man in more ways than he can count. Some too brutal to mention. So, seeing you using your teeth as last resort to nearly bite the enemy's head off was like really falling in love with you. He did absolutely did not care that there was blood on your teeth, spilling down your lips as you tried your best to spit it out.

[paper-mario-wiki]

This isnt directed at anything specific, just want to do my best to help out the many people fleeing countries to seek aid in thailand as someone who both grew up here/speaks the language Id like to provide some specific experiences that help foreigners adjust.

First its extremely likely if someone moves to the south east that has been living in the northern hemisphere you will struggle most with the heat and humidity. White People Especially. All of you need to be drinking extra water everyday, this is not a joke heat stroke is very common for white people here because they dont realize how dehydrated they are until its already causing harm. Please stay safe.

If the summers start getting too hot take day trips to mountain towns/businesses there's a lot of local industry around people going to cooler weather at higher elevations during the hottest times of year.

Addition for health, Please get vaccinated Before coming here. We all trust all foreigners/tourists do (and since covid screenings in airports are much more common) Especially for mosquito transmissible diseases.

Thailand uses yearly field burning for crop rotation, this causes periods of the year with extreme air pollution/smog. cities will put out air warnings in advance so people can either seal their homes to prevent air from getting in unfiltered or wear smoke masks. I recommend people do this asap before its a necessity.

Language wise thailand has a large enough tourism base that most people also learn at least some english/there's businesses that teach foreigners thai. Learning before traveling is appreciated, the main thing to keep in mind is that since thai is a tonal language without tone control words can get mixed up/confused. (this is pretty normal for new speakers tho)

If people want to learn thai i highly recommend watching news broadcasts! you get to see a wide variety of speakers and use in conversations. Searching "ข่าว PP" or "ข่าว TNN" on youtube will get you fairly official political broadcasts, but even if you just search ข่าว or ข่าวดึก can bring up a lot of good examples of people speaking.

If youre an english speaker one of the best jobs you can look for is as an english teacher or tutor. It's a very searched for job and usually provides good opportunity for learning the language as well.

If youre in a big city look up the local train routes and use those, as finding parking/driving places will generally be much worse than just using the trains. That being said getting a motor bike is fairly easy and inexpensive for commutes if needed.

This is a disappointing but necessary heads up for foreigners, colorism is still a fairly wide spread issue in thailand. People arent violent but things like finding work/some aid does have discriminatory practices still and its extremely disappointing. There are local movements and people fighting to end it, but its been ingrained in a lot of people.

speaking of local communities if anyone who's coming to thailand is coming for hrt/trans support i highly recommend getting into contact with the local trans fem communities/gay centers. There's massive international culture and groups of people that will help you both get what you need and with support.

I know i said a lot here but i am genuinely really happy my home can provide safety and aid to people in hard times. I know from a lot of personal experience how scary it is when you have to flee your home, and if there's anything i can do to help ease that process even with limited resources i will do my best.

stay safe everyone and keep going.

noted. thank you so much. this is all incredibly helpful info, and it is obvious in how you delivered it that you sincerely care. i appreciate that a lot.

posting for anyone else eyeing Thailand.

[runninriot]

when it's love, it lasts forever

another fill for my @steddiebingo card

prompt: mixtape | rated: T | wc: 1.733 | tags: post Vecna, established relationship, romantic fluff, reminiscing about the past | also on ao3

   “Oh my God!”

Eddie’s stunned voice filters in from the other room, causing Steve to stop what he’s doing. He sighs, feels mocked by the piles of clothes still scattered around the room, waiting to be organised into the newly put up dresser.

Steve cracks his neck and rolls his shoulders, trying to ignore the dull ache in his muscles. He is tired. Exhausted from the long drive, physically drained from loading and unloading the van, from carrying boxes and furniture – there’s so much that still needs to be done, which is why he hates to leave his task unfinished.

But curiosity wins, so he walks into the living room to find his boyfriend sitting on the floor with his back turned, surrounded by boxes he was supposed to unpack. Instead of him stacking up the bookshelf like he said he would, it seems like something else must’ve caught his attention. Not that that’s new; Eddie gets so easily distracted sometimes. Steve doesn’t mind, has long since learned to keep up with his boyfriend’s antics – he’ll get there eventually and a little distraction doesn’t hurt anyone.

   “What you got there, babe?” Steve asks when he walks closer, trying to look over Eddie’s shoulder to see what’s gotten him all excited.

   “I can’t believe you still have that.”

Eddie blinks up at him with big, round eyes that have gone all soft, revealing the small treasure he’s cradling in his hands.

It takes Steve a moment to recognise it but when he does, his heart does a little flip.

   “Oh.”

He crouches down to get to Eddie’s level, can’t help but smile when his eyes catch the familiar drawings on the paper inlay peeking through the plastic case – the two bats in the centre, one with nails and one with wings; a heart in the top left corner with their initials in its middle, and a scatter of flowers to fill the empty space. Eddie’s handwriting at the top, ‘THIS IS MUSIC!’ screaming back at them in bold letters.

   “Of course, I kept it,” Steve finally says after clearing his throat, feeling oddly sentimental now. “I kept all of them. Everything.”

It’s true. Steve has kept every little piece of memorabilia he collected over the years. From the movie theatre ticket stub of their first unofficial date to the little note Eddie had left after spending the night at Steve’s for the first time. From the faded and wrinkled flyer of the first Corroded Coffin show Steve ever went to, to the mixtape in Eddie’s hands.

Maybe he should feel embarrassed about it, but instead of making fun of him for being such a sap, Eddie just smiles, eyes so full of love that Steve’s insides turn into a mushy, gooey mess.

   “This one’s my favourite,” he confesses, stroking a thumb over the case whose scratched surface shows all the signs of passing time and overuse.

   “It was all I listened to for weeks.”

He’s not even exaggerating, knows every song on the tape by heart from listening to it on repeat. Played the cassette so many times it’s a miracle it didn’t break, unwind or outright combust.

   “God, I remember how nervous I was to give it to you. So scared you’d hate it.”

Steve remembers, too, can see it so clearly before his mind’s eye.

After spending months in physical recovery – after Death had unsuccessfully tried to snuff out his life – Eddie had finally gotten the all clear from his doctors. ‘I’m as good as new,’ he’d announced when he entered the Harrington home, a six-pack of beer in one hand, joking about being ready to get drunk on his first sip after having been forced into abstinence for so long.

Eddie and Steve had become quite close during their time of healing, when everything kind of seemed on hold while Hawkins slowly came out of the state of shock it had been trapped in for months.

For the most part, people had thankfully remained unaware of the true horrors, eating up the highly dubious cover-up stories they’d been fed by the government. But Steve and Eddie and their little band of misfits had a lot of coping to do. Kept holding on to each other, finding strength in the support of their tightly knit circle of friends to deal with all the shit they’d been through together.

Despite everything, Steve would be lying if he said that he wished none of it ever happened because without it, he never would’ve learned what true happiness feels like. Would’ve never gotten to know Eddie the way he had after the almost-end of the world.

It was then, in their time of dealing with the aftermath of their final war against hell, something had started to sprout and bud inside of Steve.

Something that grew and kept growing until it was in full bloom, impossible to ignore anymore. Until, with a bang and a crisis and a lot of emotional support from Robin, Steve finally realised that what had blossomed over time, was actually love. Love born out of trauma and friendship and trust and survival.

They hadn’t talked about it then, that day Eddie came to celebrate his newly recovered life with him. But even though his own feelings had yet to be formed into words to be spoken aloud, Steve had noticed a shift in Eddie’s demeanour over the course of their growing closeness. Had this lingering impression that maybe he wasn’t the only one having to deal with a riot of unsorted, confusing feelings.

He could sense how nervous Eddie was that day. Could feel the crackling tension between them when they were sitting side by side on the back porch, brushing fingers when passing their shared cigarette from one to the other.

    ‘Got something for you,’ Eddie had said after finishing his beer, cheeks red, eyes cast down to where his right hand kept playing with the pocket of his jean vest.

   ‘What is it?’ Steve had asked in return, sounding breathless for reasons unknown to him at the time.

That’s when Eddie retrieved a cassette from his pocket, a mixtape he said he’d made just for him, with songs that reminded Eddie of Steve and songs he wanted Steve to listen to because they meant something special to him. And all Steve could do was stare. Stare and wonder and hold his breath, scared of opening his mouth, of possibly saying something he’d regret. Not realising how long he must’ve stayed quiet. So long in fact, Eddie started to pull back the hand holding the tape.

   ‘It’s- it’s stupid. Sorry.’

After weeks of fighting himself, Steve couldn’t hold back any longer. Couldn’t fight the urge anymore, the overwhelming need to break down the last remaining barrier that had kept him from finally telling Eddie the truth.

Only he didn’t say what he wanted him to know and instead, balled his fist in Eddie’s shirt to pull him in, crashing their lips together without warning. Kissing him in a way he’d hoped would be enough for Eddie to understand what he was trying to tell him. Pouring all his feelings into every press of lips, letting love spill from his tongue.

Love Eddie reciprocated in a way that was almost too much for Steve to handle – unashamed and unfiltered, confessing his feelings like it was the easiest thing to do.

That night, after Eddie had gone home, Steve lay in bed, not asleep but with his eyes closed, listening to the mixtape Eddie had made for him. Letting the music take him back to the moment in the Upside Down, brushing shoulders with the frazzled, doe-eyed man on the run – ‘Ozzy Osbourne? Black Sabbath? He bit a bat’s head off onstage?’ – laughing at himself for how clueless he’d been about so many things.

Steve has learned a lot since then. Not only about the seemingly endless list of things Eddie’s interested in but also, more importantly, he learned so much about himself.

   “Wanna listen to it while we ignore the mess and get to the good part of finally having an apartment to ourselves?” Eddie winks at him, the mischievous glimmer in his eyes telling Steve everything he needs to know.

   “You mean jumping into our new, giant bed so you can cuddle me until I fall asleep?”

   “Something like that, yeah.”

Tomorrow, Steve will be mad at himself for letting Eddie seduce him with his dorky charm, when he wakes up to the chaos of all the boxes still unpacked. And Eddie will be mopey as hell when he realises that they haven’t even recovered the coffee maker and cups from whatever cardboard prison they’re still stuck in.

But right now, none of that matters. Not when they’re kissing and touching each other to the sound of the music that means so much to both of them, memories locked in songs, every beat of drum a matching tune to their hearts’ rhythm. Sating their hunger for flesh and that deeper kind of love. Holding each other close in the comfort of their intimate bubble of you and me while Eddie – Van Halen, not Munson –  strums his guitar and sings along to the voice of Sammy Hagar, filling the background with a song that feels like it was written for them.

    How do I know when it’s love?

    I can’t tell you but it lasts forever.

    How does it feel when it’s love?

    It’s just something you feel together.

Later, when the music has long stopped and Steve allows sleep to slowly take a hold of him, he remembers the words and silently agrees. Love isn’t something that can be categorised into how or when or why. It’s something you just know is there because you can feel it in every part of your being. It’s something you can share through touch, and show through little things, and express with words – but even without all of that, there’s no doubt that their love, just like the song rightfully claims, is made to last forever.

It’s the essence of Steve’s existence, the one thing he can always hold on to, no matter what. This love for a man whose appreciation for life – after almost losing his fight against death – makes every day extra special. A man who constantly reminds him of how beautiful life is, and continues to make it so.

[postsforposting]

seriously mean

you can see what you like in fiction, blah blah blah, projecting onto characters is fun, etc

though it really seems like i watched a completely different movie from everyone else's deadpool and wolverine. they hate each other??? logan's a short fuse who doesn't control himself???

logan doesn't attack wade or the bartender despite the insults and the manhandling. no one's afraid of him, everyone stayed put instead of running.

logan outright says "talk about something else". not "shut the fuck up", not "you are so fucking annoying". a directive to continue yapping. just not about the suit. that's literally "keep going". he listened for however long they were walking and in the car, and he was actually LISTENING. he wasn't tuning it out. he wouldn't have known about vanessa and the avengers and the previous xmen adventures if he didn't care about what wade was saying.

all the "insults" that are actual insults only happen when wade's killed someone--after johnny dies, after nicepool dies. logan calls him an asshole after the first cassandra meeting, but in the context of his yapping having just killed johnny and nearly themselves too.

but he immediately asks for his input and then lets him yap again in the diner and all the way to the car fight. he doesn't use insults at all until after wade gets johnny killed, even though wade starts out insulting him in the bar and immediately in the void with "ape". though was he insulting logan or was it a compliment to his inhuman half, designed like an insult? logan's the one who gets down on all fours like an animal in the first fight scene, after wade's said "this is gonna be good". from how easily logan takes down sabretooth, we know that fight was pure fooling around.

logan's not mad when he finds out his universe can't be fixed, because he'll happily trade his past for wade's future--twice, going in the reactor and again when he doesn't demand to return to his own universe. a world without wade isn't one he wants. he makes to walk away because he needs to know if wade will call his name, just as logan called wade's in the reactor. and again, wade's an idiot and annoying in the reactor because he's about to kill someone again--himself.

at the end he says the avengers would be lucky to have wade. that's sincere. he was going to walk off, but chose to turn around and stay with wade. not because he had nowhere else to go, but because he likes the guy he just complimented. when meeting al, wade's throwing gross nonsense and logan is FOND and laughing along. that isn't disgust or frustration.

this is without getting into the motif that "taking the piss", aka insults aka verbal assaults, is "pulling your leg"--a joke. it's not meant seriously. it's flirting, foreplay, feeling each other out: physical violence is sex; verbal violence is first base.

so a mean joke isn't seriously like that but it very much definitely IS...."""like that""", in all seriousness. if you're insulting someone, you're "giving them an excuse", a come on to fucking go. an invite to...come....at? on?.....you. wade and logan both see right through the fourth wall, so this isn't only metatextual but also literally textual. they know what they're playing at.

a joke can also be an excuse to say one thing and mean another, like nicepool claiming to be nice while actually being rude. so if you act like you're mean.....you're saving the good stuff for special occasions. for someone who wants to have a go at you. it's why wade gets all breathy flustered in the car as they're....not playing nicely with each other. you gotta be....seriously mean.... if you wanna get under someone's skin....to live rent free with them. like family does. it's a callback to dp1: if you're paying for it, then you're only renting love, it's not a real happily ever after.

there's also a motif going on with costumes and masks making you "a different person", hence why wade and logan have radically different personalities in and out of their suits/masks. it's why wade takes off his mask to say nice things that he sincerely means.

[hyunverse]

midnight ★ haechan.

haechan x gn!reader. fluff, oneshot.

wc: 526 words.

In which Haechan comes home tired.

Haechan’s tired.

You know this because he doesn’t say anything upon entering the bedroom — no rambles about what he ate for lunch, or a corny joke Mark said during practice. He hangs his coat, and walks straight to the vanity to remove his make-up. You don’t say anything — because he must’ve talked to too many people and wanted some silence. Silently, you watch as he wipes off his make-up and steps into the shower. You’re still silent as he steps out, wet hair with a towel hanging low on his waist. You wait until he’s dressed before patting on your lap, inviting Haechan to sit. 

Sit, he does. He crawls onto the bed, seating himself on your lap and nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. He still doesn’t say anything — in his eldest son fashion. Haechan merely lets out a heavy exhale, as if sighing away the day’s worries. You rub circles on his back and lightly sway your bodies. 

“You did well today baby,” you whisper, tilting your head slightly to kiss his temple, “Proud of you.”

Haechan doesn’t say anything but you know he’s listening — he presses his face closer against your neck, his wet lips on your skin like a kiss. His grip around your neck tightens, his body inching closer towards yours. Your senses are overtaken by him — the warmth of his skin, and the smell of his body wash. Just him, him, and him. Gently, you thread your fingers through the black strands of his hair and feel its wetness. 

“Let me dry your hair, baby?” 

“Mm.”

It doesn’t take much convincing to get him sitting on the vanity chair. You begin drying his hair, careful to not tug on the strands too hard. You could feel his gaze boring holes on your body through the mirror. He’s like a boy with a schoolboy crush because when you reciprocate his gaze through the mirror, he blushes. Haechan’s tearing his gaze from the mirror to look somewhere else, the apples of his cheeks and the tips of his ears red. 

Cute. 

Once you’re done, you place the hairdryer on the vanity, using one hand to massage your boyfriend’s scalp. Immediately, his eyes flutter close, letting out groans and tilting his head towards you. A chuckle elicits from your lips, as you lean down to press a kiss on his cheek. 

Smells like your moisturizer — you know why you’ve been running out fast lately. 

“I love it when you take care of me,” Haechan whispers. It’s the first time you’re hearing his voice tonight. It’s hoarse, probably from the endless recording sessions. 

“You do?” you say, bringing down your hand to wrap your arms around his neck. Softly, you rest your chin on his head.

Haechan nods before putting his hands on yours. He looks at you through the mirror before tilting his head up, puckering his lips for a kiss. It’s awkward because it’s upside down — nevertheless, you grant him the kiss. He giggles into the kiss, his affection reverberating in every sound. 

“I love you so much,” he whispers — the three words reserved for only you. “So much.”

[olderthannetfic]

As someone who wants to write their first long romance fic, I looked up “romancing the beat” and… is that it?? Is that really how people write romances? Is that fine? I just write 2-3k for each of the 20 or so steps, and sprinkle in some jokes and some smut and at the end of the “giving up” stage some angst too and it’s done?? I am shook.

I read more fanfic romance than published romance and I was dimly aware that romance is pretty formulaic (especially published stuff) but I didn’t know the formula was so… detailed? Fill-in-the-blanks shaped even?

I've written all those things before (smut fluff and angest) although only in oneshots, so that skill is not new to me. But do I really just put Blorbo and Blorbecita in this 20-step formula and get a long fic out of it? That people will read? It can’t be that simple, can it?

(Please don’t tell me romancing the beat is satire. I'll die of embarrassment if it turns out to be satire. Please don’t be satire)

--

I find most of those plot structure books laughable though not satire.

I haven't read Romancing the Beat in years, but I remember it being more or less sound. The issue is that all books in this genre are taking something that good writers understand instinctively and making it a canned formula for those who don't.

This is an excellent way to structure your revisions when you have a draft but something isn't quite working. It's often a good way to analyze someone else's story that you already like and think works. It's a much less good way to write in the first place.

It might work for you, but trying to figure out which bit of your proposed plotline goes in this or that formal category in three act structure or Romancing the Beat's structure or whatever is often difficult and pointless.

How To Structure Your Novel and/or How to Actually Finish A Draft are very popular and lucrative genres of nonfiction writing. Tons of people want to write long things but keep failing to. They will spend plenty of money on products that purport to be the magic bullet that will get them there. That doesn't make the book bad, but just... you know... keep that context in mind.

In my experience, all of the books of this type sound decent and can probably help you grind through a long thing with somewhat less likelihood of giving up, but I usually look at my outline that I instinctively know works and at the canned formula I'm supposed to awkwardly shoehorn my outline into and decide it's more trouble than it's worth.

And no, I don't think that youtube video on the four types of writers is accurate either. These formal structures don't suck because I'm the instinctive type instead of whatever the other one was. They suck because they're simplistic lenses applied after the fact rather than a truly accurate description of why plots in fun books work. To make the structure, they've had to flatten and ignore on the same level as Joseph "the sexist, racist hack" Campbell's hero's journey does.

[trustmypoison]

SVT when you simp for them

Requested? Yes!

Request: ‘Hiiii, just saw Ateez and simping for them, can I request same for Seventeen please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 Thank you very much🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻’

Seungcheol

Have you ever seen someone try to look smug while also blushing profusely? That’s what this would be like. He wants to be cool and say, “Of course, you love me,” but any smugness he tries to inject into the statement falls flat because of how pink his cheeks are. 

Jeonghan

Genuinely smug. If there’s any blushing at all, it’s so minimal that you might not notice. He’s absolutely going to egg you on and be like, “Uh huh, and what else?” I fear he’d be smug either way, so you might as well tell him what you really think. 

Joshua

Giggly. Not even blushing, just giggling at how sweet he thinks it is. He’ll dish it out as well - in five minutes though. He’s gotta soak up all of your lovely compliments first. 

Jun

A whiner!! Doesn’t know how to take it so he groans and tells you to stop fangirling from behind his hands as he covers his face. But if you do stop, he might peek between his fingers because he wasn’t serious. Keep going, he just can’t look at you. 

Hoshi

Melts into a puddle. I mean, just curls up into a ball against you because he’s overwhelmed by the compliments. Blushing with a big smile. Joshua needs five minutes but Hoshi needs hours to be able to properly return the simping. 

Wonwoo

Totally entertained by this. Will not blush and might not even crack a smile, doing his best to look unaffected. But he thinks you’re cute and your words are sweet. An underwhelming reaction of “Mhm, whatever you say,” but I’m not sure what you expected here. 

Woozi

Another one that’s secretly entertained by this, but whereas Wonwoo’s reaction is flat, Woozi actually does a great job of looking annoyed. He’ll be like, “Why are fangirling like this right now??” He’ll fold if you seem worried that he’s genuinely bothered, but he otherwise will act like your compliments are physically painful. 

DK

A shy baby. He has so much to say usually, but he’ll be a little flustered and soft-spoken when you do this. Later, when you’ve settled down, he’ll ask if you really meant all the nice things you said. Tell him yes!!!!

Mingyu

I think he’d genuinely be pretty smug to start, but the longer it goes on he might start to feel sort of flustered. I think he likes words of affirmation and this really feeds that need. But I think one of his preferred love languages to give is physical affection, so this just ends in him wrapped around you. 

Minghao

I think he’d be one of the few who doesn’t get flustered or shy, but at the same time isn’t super smug either. I think he’d just soak up your attention with a sweet, slightly entertained smile. He won’t fish for more simping or anything, but he’ll let you go on as long as you feel like. 

Seungkwan

Did you ever think that simping would end in a fight?? Not serious, of course. But for every statement you have, he’s going, “And what about YOU!!” Aggressive as it is, there’s a lot of sweetness in how vehemently you both simp after one another. 

Vernon

A long stare and a few blinks, and finally, a simple nod and an “okay.” I hope you didn’t expect anything more. I mean, he’s delighted by the compliments but I just don’t see him being expressive about it. He takes your simping and ranting in stride. 

Chan

This is an ego boost for him for sure, but he can’t let you know that. He’ll listen and slowly nod, sometimes looking concerned. He’s totally joking when he finally kisses your cheek and says, “You worry me sometimes.” 

[fluentmoviequoter]

Someone I Care About

Requested Here!

Pairing: Lev 'Oz' Ozdil x fem!detective!reader

Summary: When Karadec pairs you and Oz on an unusual case, you get more than one confession.

Warnings: fluff, angst, typical show warnings, brief depiction of dead animal and animal autopsy, love confessions, PROTECTIVE OZ!!

Word Count: 4.0k+ words

A/N: I don't think I'll ever get over this scene. Someone please tell me I'm not the only one who didn't realize they changed his name despite watching the previous episodes over and over.

“Good morning!” you greet as you enter the bullpen with two donut boxes.

“Now it is,” Daphne replies with a smile. “Thank you!”

“Of course. Any leads on the parking lot case?”

“Morgan’s reviewing the security logs now, but nothing yet,” Karadec answers. You open a box and pass him a paper bag with an apple fritter as he tells you more about what Morgan is looking for.

“Thanks,” Oz says softly, taking his favorite from the open box.

Daphne shakes her head and looks at Karadec as you approach your desk. They can see that Oz is different with you, but she knows you don’t see it.

“I can check with tech to see if they recovered the camera footage from the gas station across the street,” you offer as your computer turns on.

“Yes, but check for other cameras while you’re at it. Most of the stores were closed last night when we went to the scene, so see if they’re willing to help out now,” Karadec requests.

“Will do.”

Oz watches you momentarily, then averts his gaze to the crime scene report on his desk. He knows he has a growing crush on you – though he wishes there was a better word for his feelings – but you’re partners first, and your work and safety are more important.

“I know who killed the man in the 1987 BMW M3 E30 coupe,” Morgan announces as she arrives.

“The couple in the orange tracksuits?” you ask.

Oz laughs, but when Morgan turns toward you with her brows raised, he stops.

“Did you get a confession?” Morgan inquires.

You shake your head and turn your monitor toward the rest of your team, and the gas station surveillance footage just emailed by the tech team shows the couple carrying pistols in high resolution.

“Morning,” Soto calls, stepping out of her office. “We’ve got a 10-54 and a 10-91d at Silver Lake Reservoir. First responders requested assistance from Major Crimes about 5 minutes ago.”

“We’ve got two suspects in last night’s murder,” Karadec responds.

“Then divide and conquer.”

Karadec nods, then turns to you. “You and Oz head to the reservoir. Keep us updated.”

“Yes, sir,” you reply. “I emailed the manager of the hotel beside the scene and they’re sending all of last night’s recordings over.”

Karadec, Daphne, and Morgan leave, and Oz offers to drive. While you gather your things, Daphne punches Karadec’s arm as he shifts into drive.

“What?” he demands.

“I know what you’re doing, and while I appreciate it, what if it doesn’t work?” she questions.

“Something has to happen. Everyone else can see how he feels,” Karadec grumbles. “Besides, it wasn’t my idea.”

“Selena?!” she exclaims.

“Force him close to her and something has to happen, right?” Morgan says. “I’m surprised you haven’t forced them into a closet or something already.”

“We’re professionals,” Karadec reminds her. “But if this doesn’t work, we might need a Plan B.”

“I know where the keys to the supply closet are,” Morgan offers.

“Let’s make imprisonment plan Z,” Daphne suggests.

“10-54 and 10-91d is a weird combination,” you muse as Oz drives toward the reservoir.

“What are the odds it’s a man beats the gun, gun beats gorilla, gorilla beats the man type thing?” he jokes.

“In Los Angeles? Slim to none.”

“Does dispatch have anything that could help?”

“All that’s in the prelim report is the presence of the bodies and a note that there was a suspicious vehicle nearby that left as soon as patrol arrived. Odd, but not inherently helpful.”

“Hey, thanks for the donuts,” Oz says, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.

You smile and close the report as you reply, “No problem. It’s been a long week, it’s the least I could do.”

“Right,” Oz murmurs. As he hits the blinker to pull into the reservoir’s lot, he asks, “So, uh, are you doing anything this weekend?”

“No. Are you?” Before Oz can answer, he hits the brakes, you lean toward the dash, and you both whisper, “Whoa.”

“Is that…” Oz begins after he parks.

“A crocodile?” you finish. “Yeah.”

“I was going to say alligator.”

You exit the car together before you explain, “I babysat for Morgan while she was working a case - Ludo was busy - and Elliot showed me a documentary. Crocodiles are gray-ish green and have narrow, triangular snouts.” As you reach the crime scene, you squat and say, “Like this guy.”

“It’s a weird one, huh?” a nearby police officer asks.

“That’s an understatement,” Oz replies. “Were you first on scene?”

“Yes, sir, my partner and I were. When we arrived, the bodies were on the bank here. There was a .357 magnum in the vic’s hand.”

“The human vic?” you clarify with a smile.

“IT would make a much cooler story if it was in croc’s,” Oz says.

You grin at him, and Oz momentarily forgets to focus on the case.

“The report mentioned a suspicious vehicle?” you say, standing.

“Right. It was still pretty dark, but it was a van of some kind parked over there,” the officer states, pointing toward a taped-off section of Armstrong Avenue.

“Like a moving van?” Oz inquires.

“More like an ice cream truck,” another officer answers. “It pulled away with the lights off right after we arrived.”

“Someone could have moved the croc here in an ice cream truck,” you muse. “Human, too, I suppose.”

“You don’t think it died here?” an officer asks.

“Don’t think it lived here,” you correct. “American crocodiles are eastern animals. Most of them live in Florida. There’s close to no chance that this thing came from anywhere in LA.”

“But it looks like the vic killed it,” Oz adds. “We need to get the ME.”

“Croc is not going to be easy to move,” you murmur.

“You watched the documentary; how much do they weigh?” Oz asks.

“Females are about 400. Males can get up over 1,000, I think. This guy looks pretty big, so I’m guessing he’s a male.”

“Can you not just flip it over like a kitten?” one of the officers suggests.

“Not if it’s 1,000 pounds,” Oz points out.

“And not without sticking my finger in its cloaca,” you state. You furrow your brows and mutter, “I can’t hang out with those kids anymore.”

Oz pulls a pair of gloves on and retrieves the victim’s wallet. “No ID in here. I’ll call the ME, if you want to brainstorm what to do about croc.”

“Sounds good,” you reply. “And we’re going to need the evidence you collected,” you tell the officers.

“I’ll move it to your car.”

“This is weird,” Oz whispers as he raises his phone to his ear.

“You mean this isn’t going to be open-and-shut?” you ask incredulously. “Karadec will be so disappointed in us.”

“I’ll take the blame.”

“Gentlemanly, but no need.” You bump your elbow against Oz’s and add, “We’re going to solve this.”

“Yeah,” he agrees softly.

An hour after you return to the station, you spin in your seat while your phone’s speaker plays monotonous hold music.

“ME texted,” Oz alerts. “Cause of death appears to be blood loss from a traumatic injury to the abdomen. She can’t confirm whether that injury is a croc bite until she finishes the autopsy.”

“I’m betting it’s not that simple,” you say. “Even if it were, someone has to find out who dumped a crocodile in a reservoir.”

“I’ve got camera footage!” he cheers, beginning to type.

“I’ve got-” you glance at your watch before concluding – “another 45 minutes on hold.”

Oz nods, and your computer chimes before he wheels his chair beside yours. He knocks into your chair and grabs your hand to steady both of you. Your eyes lock, and you laugh before you open his email.

Oz curls his fingers into his palm, fighting the urge to reach for your hand again. The video from the traffic camera begins, and as you fast-forward through it, Oz takes the chance to watch you rather than the screen.

“Leo Sherman,” someone greets on your phone.

You reach across Oz and pull the receiver to your ear before you introduce yourself.

“Yes, I’m working a case involving an American crocodile… I took some measurements at the scene, one second…”

Oz sees your notebook before you do and passes it to you. You smile, mouth thank you,and tilt the phone where he can hear, too.

“Okay, it was 14 feet and 7 inches from the tip of its nose to the tip of its tail, the tail base was broad, and it was a male,” you read off.

“Good measurements,” Leo muses. “You confirmed it was a male?”

“I did.”

“Didn’t think LAPD had it in ‘em. Alright, so how’d this crocodylus acutus die?”

“.357 magnum shot to the head.”

“Ouch. Let me ask – how do I phrase this – did the body seem bloated?”

You look at Oz, who shrugs before he says, “I thought so. It’s legs looked too small, if that makes sense.”

“Perfect sense,” Leo replies. “Unfortunately, there’s not much I can tell you without seeing the body. If you have a lab that can work with it, I can review the findings.”

“But it’s not from here, right?” you clarify.

“Most certainly not. I’d guess it’s from the Southeastern US and was either heavily sedated or killed before it was moved.”

“Could it have survived here for any length of time? Specifically in a reservoir?”

Leo hums. “Hypothetically, it could have. These animals prefer salinity, and while I’ve seen them in river systems in Florida, I can’t imagine prolonged survival – let alone thriving – in a reservoir.”

You hesitate, then ask, “Any chance you’d like an all-expenses paid trip to Los Angeles to solve the mysterious death of this guy?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

After you end the call, you contact the morgue to ask them to store the crocodile however they can. With their confused assurance, you return your attention to the computer.

“It does look like an ice cream truck,” Oz says as the suspicious vehicle arrives at the reservoir just after midnight.

“Ice cream? You two planning a date?” Morgan asks as she returns.

You turn quickly, your eyes wide as you look at Daphne. She shakes her head, and you exhale in relief that your secret is safe.

“How’s the 10-91d/10-54 case?” Karadec asks.

“I have the same question,” Soto interjects.

“You first,” you insist.

“Daphne got the confession,” Karadec says. “Budget Bonnie and Clyde didn’t want to talk to me, so she told them about a high school boyfriend who became a petty thief.”

“They ate that up,” Daphne adds. “Maybe I should have been an actress.”

“Let me guess,” Morgan says, pointing at Oz. “Drowning victim and a carcass scavenged by a mountain lion.”

“Oh, you’re not even close,” Oz brags, smiling as he crosses his arms.

“For once, Morgan, I don’t think you’re going to guess this,” you comment. “By the way, Lieutenant Soto, I spent $1,500 of department resources to bring in an expert.”

Morgan scoffs and points at herself while Soto raises her brows in a silent challenge.

“We need his help,” Oz defends.

“And I’m asking for forgiveness,” you add with a smile. “Did I mention your hair looks really nice today?”

“I’m about to ask what you need an expert for, and if it’s something-“

“A dead crocodile,” you and Oz interrupt together.

The bullpen falls silent, and Soto says, “You’re forgiven.”

“Do you know what a group of crocodiles is called?” Morgan asks.

“Bask on land, float in water,” you answer as you turn back to your computer.

“Wait, go back,” Oz requests as you resume the video. “Look, something’s reflecting in the windshield.”

You lean closer and play the moment when the van enters the neighborhood beside the reservoirs.

“It’s an operator permit,” Morgan interjects. “State regulations require all operators to have one.”

“Aren’t they usually in windows?” you argue.

“Some places state that operators have to wear them while operating. Sec 250.1103(j)(2) of the Jacksonville Municipal Code, for example.”

“How do you know that?” Karadec asks.

“Documentary on how sex offenders utilize tourism and sales in Florida to choose targets,” she answers with a shrug.

“An ice cream truck from Florida could transport a crocodile from Florida,” you tell Oz.

Your phone buzzes, and you read the message before you stand. “We’re going to see the ME,” you announce. “Congratulations on the confession, Daphne.”

“Thanks! And good luck with the crocodile,” she replies.

“We don’t need luck,” Oz scoffs. He lowers his voice to add, “Thank you.”

“Dr. Sherman left Orlando about an hour ago,” you tell Oz as you enter the station the following morning. “He has several layovers, so he won’t be here until tonight. Morgue has the croc on ice until he can start the autopsy tomorrow.”

“A crocodile autopsy,” he repeats. “Florida’s a different place.”

“And Los Angeles is so normal,” you agree facetiously.

“I was looking at the ME’s autopsy report and the toxicology, and I don’t think John Doe died near that reservoir,” Oz explains.

“Okay,” you murmur, pulling your chair to his side. “Why?”

He spreads the files across his desk, then points to the diagram of the deadly wound on the unidentified victim.

“Silver Lake Reservoir is concrete lined, but the ME said the wound had sand embedded in it.”

“Sand as in beach sand or dirt?” you specify.

“Sand from a salt-water source. ME supports our idea that croc wasn’t from here but also thinks the vic wasn’t either.”

“I mean, yeah, that makes sense. Did you contact CDFA? If they drove the ice cream truck into the state, they would’ve gone through a border protection station.”

“Would you believe me if I said CDFA has no record of a Florida ice cream truck? The man on the phone said they’ve gotten pretty lax, and if It went through an auto lane, they probably waved them through.”

“That’s helpful. Great for the people who don’t want to stop, but not as great for us. Granted, I guess pre-packaged ice cream isn’t a plant and pest concern.”

“Pretty much what he told me.”

“Have you been here all night?” Karadec asks.

You jump slightly, moving back from Oz as Karadec walks to his desk.

“No, we just needed an early start,” you answer.

“I bet you did,” Morgan teases as she arrives. “So, catch me up, maybe I can help. Unless you want to keep looking at those reports sitting closer than professional work friends, in which case, continue.”

“Morgan,” Karadec sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“It’s fine,” you say. “Our crocodile expert won’t be here until tonight, so we’ve got a day to work without any information on where it came from. We think our vic probably came from the same place, so unless we can find the ice cream truck today, we have nothing to go on.”

“We requested a list of Florida’s registered ice cream trucks, but they told us it would take a while,” Oz adds.

“Put out a BOLO?” Karadec asks.

“Yeah, nothing so far.”

“We could go out and look,” you suggest. “Not like we have anything urgent here.”

Oz tilts his head, then nods. As you gather your things, Daphne enters the bullpen and asks to talk to you.

“Are you going to do something?” she asks after leading you into an empty office.

“About?” you respond softly.

She smiles and shakes her head. “You have feelings for him, and ignoring them won’t make them go away.”

“Do Karadec and Morgan know?”

“I don’t think so, I think they’re pointing it out for the same reason I do.”

“Pointing what out?”

“That you and Oz work well together, and you’d be great together in other ways, too.”

“He’s my partner, Daph, I’m not going to jeopardize that because I have feelings for him.”

“But you’ll jeopardize your happiness,” she argues. “That’s not better.”

“You don’t get it. I… I can’t lose him.”

“Then don’t let him get away.”

You nod, hear Oz call your name, and exit the office. As you follow him to the car, you wonder if Daphne’s right. What if ignoring your feelings leads to a worse outcome than telling Oz how you feel?

“Good morning,” Leo Sherman greets brightly. “I have some answers for you.”

“Can I take a picture for my son?” Morgan asks, her eyes wide at the crocodile on the oversized metal table.

“Please,” he encourages. “I love to see kids interested in science. The ones that aren’t exhibiting sociopathic tendencies, I mean.”

“We understand,” Soto assures him. “Now, what did you find that can help us?”

“This crocodile is from Florida. The body was nearly frozen after death but hadn’t thawed all the way when you found it at the crime scene.”

“How can you tell that?” you ask.

“Essentially, the body decomposed at different rates. Some of the organs are more preserved than the tissues. But, the body didn’t freeze entirely, so there is very uneven decomp. I understand your victim showed similar signs of offset decomp?”

“Yes, sir,” Oz answers. “ME couldn’t pinpoint time of death.”

“Then I’d wager the bodies were kept in the same place for similar lengths of time.”

“So we’re working a secondary scene and these, uh, victims were killed in Florida?” Karadec clarifies.

“That’s my best guess,” Leo says. “There’s nothing remarkable about this creature. It wasn’t a pet, cause of death was a gunshot to the head from a relatively close range, and it’s jaw was broken after death.”

“To frame him for the murder of our victim,” you connect. “We need to find the person or people driving that ice cream truck.”

As if on command, your phone rings with an incoming call from a Florida number. You excuse yourself to answer it in the hallway, then return with a bright smile.

“Ramone Sears,” you say. “He didn’t renew his ice cream truck registration, and you’ll never guess who just attempted to register one in Los Angeles.”

“Do you know where he is?” Oz asks.

“No, but I know which DMV he was at this morning, and he can’t be staying far from there.”

“Get out there,” Soto says. “Call in reinforcements.”

“Yes, ma’am,” you and Oz answer.

“Thank you, Dr. Sherman!” you call.

“Are you kidding? This is the best vacation I’ve been on since my honeymoon.”

“Ramone Sears,” you call as you approach the open ice cream truck.

“Buenos dias,” he replies.

“I know you speak English,” you say, flashing your badge. “We’re with the LAPD and have a few questions for you if you don’t mind.”

“Of course not.” He sits in the open refrigerated back and spreads his arms. “How can I help?”

“How long have you been in Los Angeles?” you ask as Oz moves around the truck. He shakes his head as he returns to your side.

“About a week,” Ramone answers. “Looking for a new start, you know.”

“Right. Out of curiosity, did you go through a border patrol station when you came in?”

“Sure. Very nice woman waved as we went through. It was busy and hot, poor thing.”

Nodding, you prepare yourself to ask, “Did the dead crocodile smell linger or did the constant AC help with that?”

“I don’t understand,” he murmurs, looking between you and Oz.

“We know that your truck was parked by the Silver Lake Reservoir three nights ago. The same night a murdered man and a dead crocodile were dumped in the reservoir,” Oz explains.

“I parked by the reservoir because I didn’t have money for a hotel,” he explains, laughing. “I pawned a few things the next day and got a room at the Motel 6.”

“And now you have the money to reopen your ice cream truck,” you muse. “How much stuff did you pawn?”

“Do you even hear your questions?” he challenges, defensive. “I couldn’t move a crocodile by myself. I’m from Florida, I’ve seen them.” He looks at you and lips his licks before he says, “I’m strong in other ways.”

You grow uncomfortable with the unwelcome flirting, but Ramone has the answers you need, and if you stay on his good side, you might get a confession or something else you can use.

“I bet,” you answer quickly before changing the subject. “If you were parked out here, maybe you saw something that could help us.”

“Can’t see much from inside an ice cream truck. Care to come in and see?”

“No,” you answer firmly.

You get a text and smile as you ask, “So, you’re from Florida. Do you know Trey Peters?”

Ramone’s eyes shift quickly, and you know he recognizes the name.

“I can’t say I do. Most of my contacts in Florida are women.”

“I bet,” Oz mumbles, crossing his arms tightly over his chest.

“Give me something I can work with,” you request.

“Oh, I can give you more than that,” Ramone flirts, pulling himself to stand.

He takes a step toward you, and Oz immediately moves between you. “Sit down,” he demands. “One more comment like that and you'll be in the back of a different vehicle. Clear?”

Ramone clenches his jaw but sits, and Oz moves to your side.

“If something happened, just tell us,” you encourage him.

“The crocodile didn’t do anything,” Ramone mumbles.

“Trey killed the croc?” Oz clarifies.

“For no reason.”

“And that made you angry,” you deduce. “So you…”

“Just wanted to give him a taste of his own medicine. He- he wasn’t supposed to die,” Ramone says quietly.

“Alright, stand up, arms to the side,” Oz instructs. “You’re under arrest.”

You call for backup, then notify Soto so she can contact the Florida police. After Ramone receives his Miranda rights and is placed in the back of a patrol car, you fall into Oz’s passenger seat and sigh.

“Thank you,” you say. “I wanted him to talk, but not like that.”

“It’s no problem,” Oz assures. He lays his hands on the wheel but doesn’t start driving. “I could tell you were uncomfortable. It made me angry, too.”

You turn to look at him, and Oz sighs.

“He overstepped,” he continues. “Which is enough on its own, of course, he was way out of line, and you’re my partner. But you’re also… You’re also someone that I care about, someone I have feelings for.”

You don’t speak, letting the confession hang between you as you consider Oz’s words. Consideration meaning you repeat them in your head with pure joy rushing through you.

“You’re someone I have feelings for too,” you confess softly. Oz looks at you, his smile growing when he sees the kindness in your gaze.

“Everyone else already knew,” Oz muses, taking your hand over the console.

“Except me, because I was too busy trying to make sure I didn’t lose you,” you add. “I’m sorry.”

“You should be,” he jokes. “You owe me so many donuts.”

“I think I can handle that.”

“Welcome back,” Soto greets when you return to the station. “Marshals are escorting Sears to LAX to be tried in Florida as we speak. They’ve added unlawful transportation of a dead body to the lengthy list of charges.”

“If we didn’t have the whole double jeopardy thing, I’d be writing up an affidavit for harassment,” Oz says under his breath.

“And what exactly does that mean, Detective?” Daphne questions far too brightly.

She looks pointedly at you, so you conceal your smile and say, “I think I have an idea.”

Morgan’s jaw drops, and she stands. “This belongs to your janitorial staff,” she tells Soto as she drops a key on Daphne’s desk.

“Morgan,” Karadec scolds. He looks at Oz and murmurs, “Finally.”

“Hey, you’re not the only one that had to wait,” Oz defends.

“But you didn’t have to see all the pining,” Daphne argues.

“Careful,” Oz warns.

Your friends don’t heed his warning, but their celebration and teasing seem to quiet when Oz smiles at you.

Later, your phone buzzes with a text reading: Still free this weekend?

[bandsandwristbands]

Gaara/Gaalee headcannons? 👉👈 (only if you want to)

*cracking my knuckles* DO I WANT TO?? BOY DO I! I am so glad you asked!! I have way too many I think lol

I won't put them in any particular order but I'll separate sfw and nsfw lol

Sfw hcs

Gaara is uncannily good at impressions- like so accurate it's off putting to see on his face. (I imagine this comes from him analysing the fuck out of Human Behavior™ in order to mask his crazy lol) His party trick is his Naruto impression. All of konoha 12 have seen it and cried laughing and it becomes an inside joke for ppl to whisper "dattebayo" in the most dead pan voice possible to make each other laugh at inappropriate times.

Gaara has a bunch of stuffed animals. Mostly gifts from his siblings and Lee as they're the only ones who've seen his bed just- fuckin buried in plushies- "I don't use it to sleep anyways." <-Gaara justifying the plush pile.

I've covered this pretty extensively (here) and lots of others have this one too but Gaara w/ piercings (I tend to include belly ring and tongue piercing a long with his ears)

Also sharp nails and canines BUT I also think Gaara's teeth are a little crooked, probably tearing stuff open with his teeth growing up and when transforming into his tailed beast form his teeth grow a bit too big for his mouth and so push around to make room. Also I think it'd be very cute ~

Especially when Lee and Gaara first get together- Gaara being starved for touch and affection will not realize he's getting overwhelmed by it until he's like "Actually I need to leave right now" and has to decompress by himself for awhile.

Alternatively, after nightmares or panic attacks- he likes Lee to lay on him like a heavy weighted blanket. He feels safe that way.

They both experience cute aggression for each other. When pining, Lee would just burst into random exercises looking *pissed* -"What's wrong with Lee?" -"He saw Gaara sneeze." -Gaara on the other hand will intentionally shoulder check Lee (not very affective, Lee doesn't clock it as aggressive) or use his sand to subtly tickle, trip, poke at and generally bother him (this does get a bit of a rise out of Lee which Gaara also thinks is cute)

Once together they will add new ways to express the cute aggression including but not limited to: Random biting, dipping the other dramatically, sneak attack bear hugs, not so gentle punches/slaps.

Gaara really likes that Lee isn't afraid to get angry at him or push back against the things he says. He does get genuinely pissed about it sometimes- they're both stubborn- but it's really comforting for him to be able to raise his voice or get visibly upset and not be met with fear.

Lee has crazyyyyy rejection sensitivity (adhd hc) He is bracing for it at all times. He masks it really well by kicking up the enthusiasm but at night he is Ruminating™ and it Sucks™

This will be really obvious in fic from me but I think Gaara's sand acts in reflection of his subconscious feelings and motives when he's not actively meaning to manipulate it. (I think the intent to protect from his mom is still there but I just think it's too weird for it to literally be her consciousness lol) I like treating it like a Disney princess companion- expressive, a little whimsical, and an extension of Gaara himself.

Falling asleep is extremely unsettling for Gaara- he's fine once he's asleep but the act of getting there activates his fight or flight often. Easier with Lee cuddles.

They're toxically obsessed with each other. So enamoured that if they were anyone else they would be creeped tf out~ but for them it's romantic ~

On that note- Gaara expresses his love by saying really gorey shit like "I want to wear your skin" or "I want you to rip my chest open and feel how my heart beats just for you" type shit- serial killer stuff that Lee cries and swoons over! Lee: "He's so romantic!!😭" Neji: "He just said he wants to gnaw on your bones????" Lee: "I know 🥹💕💕 he even loves my bones!!"

They are also always in each others lap or tangling their feet together, they are the infinite honey moon couple.

Oh, licking. Gaara gives little 'mlem' licks instead of kisses often. On Lee's cheek or lips or the back of his hand. He kisses too, the mlem is just instinctual.

Gaara licks the blood off of small cuts that Lee gets. Lee thinks it's extremely cute and eventually picks up the habit if Gaare ever gets a little knick as well. (Sakura rips into them about it but that won't stop them.)

Gaara spent an entire week of overnights studying massage therapy and ways to help relieve Lee's muscle aches and cramps, makes it a point to rub Lee down once a week at least.

He will not admit to Lee that it makes his wrists hurt.

Lee has chronic pain btw.

They both love spicy.

Gaara likes sweets but won't admit it.

Lee learns Sunan endearments and uses them on Gaara constantly and it makes Gaara turn to putty every time.

Nsfw ones !

They both love marking each other up and being marked- they're both extremely possessive and also very very into the idea of belonging to the other- neither of them ever thought anyone would want them for something beyond their abilities as weapons of war- Gaara especially likes feeling desired in a way that feels unmistakably human.

(Piggy backing off that last one, Gaara has Rock Lee [ロック・リー] tattooed on his inner lower lip before their even married because he is a little bit unhinged like that- he is self aware enough to keep it a secret for awhile but obviously Lee discovers it eventually- since I am in the Gaara Oral Fixation Fan Club- and after freaking out about "omg gaara that is permanent there's no way you actually want my name branded on you" Gaara's like that is definitely what the intention is- they both get horny about it)

Frottoge~ they hump each other like animals lol

Gaara is a tease (can you tell I want him to have more little shit tendencies) both cuz Lee's shock every time is amusing and also because Lee gets easily frustrated and will jump him later.

Fighting is foreplay. Gaara likes being crushed and choked- Lee likes to be clawed and bitten like a scratching post

Gaara is kinda gross 😏 (still having some jinchuriki senses) He gets easily worked up about Lee's bodily fluids- loves his sweat (will randomly lick him after workouts), demands Lee spit in his mouth, kind of a cumslut, goes feral over the smell and taste of Lee's blood.

They both love giving head. Gaara has a gag reflex- likes Lee activating it.

Gaara tends to bottom more because he likes the full feeling, like Lee is all around him and making him disappear, (and cockwarming because he doesn't like the empty feeling after, he enjoys the closeness on a visceral level)

Lee loves trying to overwhelm Gaara (in a good way) with Good Feelings and that means pleasure too, he's an attentive learner and does not let Gaara get away with just one nut- he's trying to make up for lost time.

And also he gets a power rush about getting to be the only one who gets to see Gaara in that context, Lee doesn't get trusted to be in charge of... Anything really. So having Gaara trust him with his body and his mind really gets to his uwus and his dick.

Lee has a small crisis when they start fooling around, worried about being disrespectful, - "Gaara I think I'm some sort of pervert!" -"I'm not exactly complaining about that 👁️👁️" - it takes a minute for him to let go of the idea that every sexual encounter has to be really romantic and loving- plus, similar to Lee getting angry with him- Gaara likes that Lee is a little disrespectful sometimes- it does take some coaxing for Lee to stop asking "are you sure I'm not being to mean??"

Lee has also learned dirty Sunan endearments and lovessss watching Gaara turn red in the face about it.

Gaara has a hard time getting out of his head so Lee takes it as a personal challenge to fuck Gaara mindless- it becomes a necessity after long swaths of stressful meetings and legislation, he knows he's succeeded when Gaara forgets Common and starts rambling in Sunan 👌

When Gaara does top, it's usually because he's feeling big emotions about Lee, sometimes premature grief that one day one of them will die, other times extreme gratitude that Lee even exists, he's still aggressive about it and honestly a little sloppy but Lee loves it, gets really flustered and bashful about all the affection. Growling, drooling top + giggly bottom.

Lee loves to be praised.

Gaara likes the combination of degradation and praise, especially if its condescending.

Oh when they first start fooling around or when Gaara's feeling Very Good his sand acts up, popping the cork, scrambling around, crawling up around Lee to hold him closer. He's worried it'll freak Lee out at first but it processes to Lee as positive feedback.

They find themselves fucking semi publicly way more frequently than they ever intend to- they just get caught up in each other very easily.

Alright alright I'll cut myself off here, I've been writing these up for over an hour and I need to shower lol

I hope my offering is acceptable! Thank you for giving me an excuse to ramble! Xoxoxoxo

[tabletopsystem]

I think Judgement has a lot of potential to become my favourite Patron campaign because where all the other campaigns stumble across a loose fitting (maybe not quite as loose in PD) found family trope in the PCs, Judgement seems to very intentionally be doing it and it's working very well.

Buck is a father and Bebo has said he intends to just have Buck be a dad to everyone in silly and serious ways.

Paeon, while not explicitly taking on any one specific role, is a doctor, and a caregiver, and they like to go along with everyone else's ideas no matter how silly or bad intentioned they are. They have been bonding with the party in such a sweet way with all three of them (Fly fishing with Buck, going along with Mel's handshake joke, having fun with "Jaguire" Joe to the point that they just forgot about their plan with the spikes and just kept painting together). They give the vibes of a parent who cares a lot about their kids and wants to try and re-explore with them as they grow up.

Mel and Jaguar feel very much like siblings, even if that'd be weird cuz of how Jaguar's been treating Mel. I think this was especially emphasized in the most recent episode when they had a fight and then really started to open up to each other, especially with Mel actually paying attention to Jaguar for the first time and Jaguar trusting her with the stuff he considers to be his greatest secret. They feel like an older sister who gets annoyed by her younger brother but really does care about him, and the younger brother who just has a lot of cool stuff they're interested in that nobody else in the family really cares about. When Mel started actually listening to Jaguar he opened up to her instantly, and when Jaguar took a moment to be a little more grounded for Mel's sake, she saw that she could actually take him seriously.

Anyways yeah I love them they're a great family and I hope they really lean into it more.

[chibishortdeath]

Ya know, Castlevania tackled the concept that life after defeating Dracula could be difficult for a Belmont with Richter feeling like he’d lost all purpose and reason to go on living if not for saving others and fighting against something—

But, do you think any of them before him felt that way too?

I mean it sounds kind of miserable, being raised your whole life to be solely relied on for one moment… and then what? How do you handle the sudden shift to ‘not being needed anymore’? Evidently, most of them didn’t have very much happen to them after the events of their games since we don’t get to know—

But, do you think any of them ever got better? Do you think anyone before Richter ever learned how to live for themselves? Did Richter?

Anyway it’s 8 PM and I’m sitting around wondering if any of the Belmonts were still happy after their happy endings (debatable if certain ones got happy endings tbh but anyway), Konami can u check on them, I’m worried—

[nostalgia-tblr]

I watched Avengers: Age of Ultron (apart from I skipped some overly long action sequences) and I am not sure so can someone tell me whether or not Tony Stark was the baddy in that film? Because about halfway through I was sure he was but then it was maybe just an evil robot after all and I am confused because either this film was surprisingly subversive or it was about robots hitting each other.

[mad-hunts]

roleplay idea: barton's trying to say this BS that he's 'good at processing grief' when your muse was a witness to the absolute rage-filled and deranged rampage that barton went on after julien was killed by the joker in which he brutally hurt all but one of his henchmen (he killed the last one because he told him he was 'crazy' and that he 'better kill him, or he was going to tell his boss that barton had been there' and he literally just snapped, went 'you know what, i think i will kill you AND also let the joker know i killed you so he knows to never come near my family again' then killed him. like HUHHH?) at the time with your muse being like this

[happyk44]

Chewing on my thoughts like a feral dog because I'm running on like three hours of sleep and the brain be tornadoing, but like!!! Lewin and Renzou being opposite sides of the same coin or whatever. So similar in their inability to relate to other people, and yet Lewin being incapable of disliking himself over it because, despite everything Osceola taught him and knowing there's something wrong and different about him, he is unbothered by it. He accepts his deficits for what they are, violence and all. He knows he's off compared to everyone else, but that's just how it is. It's not a big deal. He makes due.

And then there's Renzou who grew up loved and isn't violent, doesn't really have those urges or curiosities, but he knows something's wrong with him, something that separates him from everyone else around him and it makes him hate himself and he gets mad about that too because it's not like he's hurting anyone so why is he so mad about it? Why does he care so much? Why does he want to fit in with his family? They fucking suck! But they love and care about each other and he doesn't and it drives him up the wall because their lives are the same, so why is he the only one who's broken?

[gregoftom]

pretty sure i’ve seen romance movies with scenes like this