#but i want dean and sam to be fucked up for eternity

[girlwithonegoal]

sorry but the only reason destiel even works is because wincest did it first and also better

i've been thinking a LOT about this and want to get it all out so here it is. if dean was truly in love with cas, he would not have hesitated to tell him so when he literally knew cas was about to DIE. we don't see that. we see shock, grief, disbelief (an angel loves me!), we see him trying desperately to process his best friend is leaving him but nowhere does dean say, or imply, with his eyes, or words, that he's in love with cas. of course he loves cas - cas is family - and cas is not exactly his brother, (closest is brother-in-arms), despite his insistence in an earlier episode - but he's not in the kind of soul-crushing love that cas is with him. he's not in love with cas, and can't be, because he's already in love with sam.

when dean dies, he gets as close as he possibly can to confessing to sam he's in love with him without actually crossing the line. he would never to that to sam - he would never do to sam what cas did to him - because he would NEVER do anything to make sam lose his agency (sidebar: not that cas doesn't respect dean. but his love confession is almost wish fulfillment - i'm going to confess to dean i love him and go out in a blaze of glory and then leave without dean ever even having to reciprocate because i know he doesn't love me back. and he's absolutely right).

dean has already had years and years of not having his own agency from john his whole fucking life! john did whatever he wanted to dean and dean took it because like hell was he going to subject sam to that bullshit. which brings us to sam and dean's childhood - not much is known of their early years before sam went to stanford and that's fully on purpose. we can almost see dean as not only a brother figure to sam but also a father figure. john leaving for weeks maybe even months at a time - how the hell did dean and sam manage to survive? by dean doing whatever he had to do. emphasis on whatever.

you see, john absolutely knows that dean is beautiful. whether you read their relationship as purely abusive or abusive with a sexual component - dean definitely did questionable things to get food on the table for sam, an aspect that's more in fanon that canon but reads true to the heart of the show. sam doesn't know because dean wanted a normal childhood for him. and dean would rather die and go to hell for 800 years than force sam to make a choice, make any choice, of a romantic and/or sexual nature related to him.

back to dean's death. this is again the closest thing to a love confession that dean can make - my baby brother - take out the word brother and it would be not only romantic but stunningly true - he raised sam, this child who grew up to be a man, this child who loves him - waiting outside sam's dorm for hours - can you picture him pacing in the snow, waiting for the one thing he wants but can't have??? why does that sound familiar? oh, right, because that's what cas said but in dean and sam's case it would be actually true. how cruel and unbelievably insane it is to find your soulmate in your brother, the one person you have that you love unconditionally, not just because they are your family but because you are in love with them, and you can never have them as long as you live.

re: american gothic and soulmatism. very different from crimson peak where thomas fully realizes the unhealthiness of the codependent incestuous relationship with his sister and wants to be free and happy with edith. but sam and dean don't want to be free. in their minds, they already are free as long as they have each other and only each other. not getting in all the other romantic relationships that the brothers have with other people bc it would take too long, but they already fulfill that need for each other and don't need anyone else...like i'm sorry i love my sister but i want to get married one day to someone else. if you read their relationship as purely platonic, it doesn't work at ALL.

the kripke early seasons fully leaned into the gothic horror aspect of it all and incest is definitely a part of that...dean and sam literally cannot live without each other. they can't do it! sam dies in dean's arms and dean can't even wait five fucking minutes without making a deal with a demon lmao. he can't eat. he can't sleep. their love is a perpetual resurrection; they keep killing each other and bringing each other back to life. because they don't know how to stop. they are a singular mangled fucked up entity. i read a fic once where the author described sam as hating his own body because it was separate from dean's and dean's whole presence was a phantom pain. and yeah. just yeah. they can't live without each other because they ARE each other.

seasons 1-3 to me are spn at its soul. that's it. cas only works as a side character, if he's a brother (like, purely platonically) to both sam and dean or just unrequited romantic love for dean. the trope of an angel falling in love with a faithless man who can't pray only works if dean hasn't been in love with sam the whole time.

[loving-family-poll]

Ultimate Incest Tournament - Final

Propaganda under the cut:

Sam/Dean:

I'm sorry but they have it all. children of metaphorical incest just continuing the cycle in any way they can. they are brothers and mother + son and wives and each other's scorned lovers and life partners they've had multiple infidelity arcs they are sexually psychopathic together they have forsook life and morality and the earth itself for each other and just love each other so much . They are literally in a heaven of their own making together for eternity, incestuously. Come on!!! Blueprint!!!!! It's not gay if he's your brother!!!!!

dean did stuff to sam's dead body in ahbl. i just know it

Messed-up, isolated sibs with all the daddy and abandonment issues. Their lives are so claustrophobic with the brothers no more than five feet apart in the car, a motel room, or standing next to civilians (face it, they are frigging magnets). Can't leave out that they are always touching each other to check for wounds which is a huge PLUS for any shipper.

Sam and Dean ARE literally the blowjob brothers. They walk into a situation and everyone goes well well well if it isn't the blowjob brothers....... And they say. Yep. That's us. And then they fix the situation with their epic love story

THE classic, iconic, show shopping, never done before etc. etc. incest ship. It changed fandom and it changed the world

Cersei/Jaime:

they're literally womb-to-tomb lovers. they feel that the rest of the world is beneath them and they're the only ones that matter. the fact that they're twins is fundamental to their attraction to each other

they’re blonde they’re evil they crossdress they’re fucked-up mirrors of one another they serve cunt they’re both bisexual probably and they’re TWINS who FUCK. who said that.

"if I were a woman, I'd be Cersei."

"I'll kill [...] the whole bloody lot of them until you and I are the only people left in this world."

"I am sick of being careful. The Targaryens wed brother to sister, why shouldn't we do the same? Marry me, Cersei. Stand up before the realm and say it's me you want."

"'Do you have a little wife, ser?'" No, I have a sister."

[samsexualdeancurious]

Separate Showers

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Words: 996

Summary: A little post-hunt recovery

Warnings: Ambiguous Reader gender, non-sexual nudity, the bunker's shower room (thank god for Jerry Wanek's set photos lol), fluff

A/N: Just a dumb lil thing I wrote to get it out of my brain.

---

To say today was a long one would be an understatement. It feels like an eternity before you’re finally making your way down the bunker steps ahead of the Winchesters. You feel gross from the long drive. You might enjoy a road trip but even you have a limit and you definitely reached it sometime during these last few hunts.

“I need a fucking shower,” you complain.

“I think we all need a shower.” Dean’s right behind you on the steps, stinking like road sweat. You wrinkle your nose and he gives your shoulder a little shove. “Shut up. Like you’re any better.”

That’s true. The Impala’s AC went out just into Kansas and the last few hours of the drive were absolutely miserable as a result, even with all four windows rolled down. You don’t want to even think about how you might smell.

Sam is quiet as he follows you back to your bedroom. It’s clear your big-brained boyfriend is feeling more than a little overwhelmed and exhausted. He needs some non-diner food, some quiet time, and maybe a nap. Or a run. Knowing Sam, probably a run.

“Separate showers?” you suggest and Sam’s hazel eyes are grateful as he nods. “All right. I’ll meet you back here.”

It took you a little while to get used to the gym shower set-up the bunker has. Even now, you have a strong preference for the stall furthest from the door so the boys won’t walk past you on their way to their own shower. Not like it’s anything Sam hasn’t seen before but there are no shower curtains! It’s the principle of the thing.

Awkward set-up aside, the bunker showers are downright magical. Probably literally magical, knowing the Men of Letters. The hot water never seems to run out, either, which is fantastic. You take your time scrubbing all the sweat and dirt from the road from your body and then waste a little more time just enjoying the steady pounding of water on your shoulders and neck.

When you do finally step out of the showers, the boys are in their own stalls. Sam’s clothes are in a pile on the floor outside the stall right next to yours and as you stop to gather them up along with your own, you can resist peeking in.

“Hi,” Sam says with a soft smile, pushing his hair out of his face.

You can’t help a grin as you lean against the dividing wall, taking in the sight of him. The way the water highlights every perfect curve and point of his body as he tips his head back to get his hair fully under the spray. “Hey, gorgeous.”

“Don’t you dare have shower sex right now,” Dean calls from a couple of stalls down and you can’t hold back a laugh.

Sam shoots you a smirk and leans out of the spray to kiss you softly. While he might look absolutely amazing, especially naked and wet like this, neither of you is really in the mood to do anything even if Dean wasn’t in the room.

“Don’t worry, you’re delicate ears are safe,” you tease as you shoot Sam one last little smile and begin making your way from the room. You don’t look but you’d bet money that Dean flips you the bird as you go by.

You’re sitting on the end of the bed, having completed your post-shower routine, when Sam comes into the room. He’s dressed in just an old pair of lounge pants and the sight of him padding barefoot into the room warms you to your core.

“Feeling a bit better?” you ask as he rubs at his hair with a towel.

He nods, wiping water droplets from his forehead. His eyes are on the item in your hand. You smile and hold the hairbrush out in offering.

“Want me to?”

“Hell yeah,” Sam sighs and you laugh softly.

“Well, c’mere then.”

Sam tosses his towel in the hamper and lowers himself to sit on the floor between your feet, back against the side of the mattress. His hair doesn’t really need to be brushed like this. The man was blessed with magic hair that just needs fingers combed through it after a shower or in the morning to look perfect. It’s really not fair. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t enjoy the process of it, though.

You work methodically, taking your time as you start with his ends and make your way up. Sam is practically melting under your hands. When you’re done with the brush, you set it aside and begin gently massaging his scalp. Sam moans softly. His head tips forward and you move your ministrations to his neck and shoulders. In no time, he’s leaning heavy and sleepy against your knee.

“Sa-am,” you murmur, leaning down to press a kiss to his temple. “C’mon. Up.”

He grumbles but allows you to guide him up onto the bed. Once he’s snuggled up against you, head resting on your chest, he’s out in seconds. It’s only early afternoon but you don’t mind holding him while he naps. Not when he snuffles softly and nuzzles against your T-shirt.

A soft knock on the doorframe draws your attention from Sam’s relaxed face to the open doorway where Dean’s standing. He’s dressed completely in his usual jeans and layers but his hair is still damp from his shower, sticking up all over like it does in the mornings before he’s gotten around to style it. You give a little wave.

“He sleeping?” Dean asks, careful to keep his voice low.

You nod.

“All right. I’m going to get started on dinner in a bit. Think he’d be up for something light? I’m thinking some soup and grilled cheese.”

That sounds delicious. Hopefully, Sam will agree. You nod again and Dean shoots you a thumbs up, flipping off the lights and closing the door as he leaves you to watch over Sam’s nap.

[welldonebeca]

Guardian Bot (6)

WC: 1.6k words Warnings: Future AU. Tension. Robot Cas. Unhealthy relationships.

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it.

Masterlist

You could feel Sam’s eyes on you as you looked over your schedule with Charlie, ready to just go out to lunch but wanting to make sure it didn’t disturb your day.

“I can set the meeting with your team for 3pm, so if you’re back from yoga at 2:30, there’s half an hour for you to shower and get ready,” she suggested, pointing at the hologram in front of you. “And you’ll have an hour of lunch. If you send in your order now, it will be ready by the time you sit down.”

You nodded along.

“I like that,” you confirmed. “Just ask for the same I got the last time I went there.”

She hummed a confirmation, and Sam cleared his throat.

“Charlotte, can you order for me too?” he asked. “I think I’ll cash in on that lunch invitation.”

You were a bit surprised as you turned to him. When was the last time you had lunch with one of your brothers to talk about anything but your company?

To be honest, you didn't even remember when you had asked him to have lunch.

“Of course, Mr Winchester.”

She set up your orders and Sam opened the door for you to get out of the office, following to the self-driving car and watching you quietly as you two waited inside it.

The whole way to the restaurant was filled with awkward silence, and he held the door open for you to walk inside, and pulled the chair for you to sit down.

Sam cleared his throat and looked at you with an awkward smile.

“It’s a nice place,” he noticed. “You like sushi.”

You nodded along slowly.

“I do,” you confirmed.

The two of you fell into silence and you watched him for a moment before speaking again.

“And how’s Jess?” you changed the subject, trying to start an actual conversation.

“She’s alright,” Sam perked up. “Great, actually. We’ve been looking into some houses outside the city. Maybe out in the country side.”

You raised your eyebrows in shock. They were moving in together already?

Sam and Jess had been together for, what… two years? You didn’t quite remember, but it couldn’t have been a lot of time, right?

“I was talking to mum and she offered her engagement ring. So… you know…”

“You’re proposing?” you asked, shocked. “Sam, that's great!”

That was amazing!

It was so good to see Sam happy. You still remember when he was just an awkward skinny boy, more limbs than anything else. Sure, you two were just two years apart but he was still your little brother!

“What about you?” he asked. “Are you seeing anyone?”

You stopped, surprised at the sudden flip of focus.

“I mean, I know you and Dean are two bachelors,” Sammy smiled awkwardly. “Though, he is not very private with his… fun outings.”

A waitress walked to you two, placing your food and drinks on the table slowly, and you were grateful for the interruption.

Was that how he saw you? An eternal bachelorette?

Or maybe he just pitied you and didn’t want to say you didn’t have any social skills to get into a relationship.

“I mean…” you looked for words, trying to be vague. “Things are fine.”

How were you supposed to explain to your brother you were technically, maybe, sort of, dating your robot?

“So... uh…” he spoke slowly. “No plus one in our house-warming party?”

“I… don’t think so,” you decided. “I mean, I can invite… well.”

You shoved a slice of salmon into your mouth before you could mention Cas.

Still, Sam raised his eyebrows, waiting for what you were going to say anyway.

“I’m still in… undefined territory,” you chose your words carefully. “So I don’t know if I’ll ever get to any house-warming party with… you know.”

As if you would ever feel comfortable enough bringing your fucking robot to your brother’s house-warming party.

It would be too humiliating.

“Unless you count Cas,” you chuckled, trying to evade any suspicion from him.  “He is great for travel and you know how bad I am with planning.”

Sam shot you a confused look.

“Cas?” he asked. “You mean Castiel?”

You shoved another sushi into your mouth. Stupid, stupid you.

“Yeah,” you nodded, mouth still full. “Castiel. Yeah.”

Sam watched you, looking at you as if he could see all of your thoughts.

“How is he being as a companion?” he asked. “Helping you out alright?”

You shrugged.

“I mean, he’s getting me into eating real food,” you chuckled. “And into yoga. And the flat is always spotless. He even cleans the rooms I don’t use.”

He also fucked you brainless last night and had been edging you since yesterday morning.

But he didn’t need to know that.

Sam chuckled.

“Well, that’s a good job done,” he smiled. “Your home was always dusty.”

You scoffed.

“I barely step there, how can I clean it?”

Your brother sighed.

“You work too much,” he pointed out. “I’m glad he’s getting you into a better routine.”

Sam nodded, eating again, and you two fell into a quieter moment before he spoke again.

“But… uh… are you sure there is no one I should know about?” he insisted. “No new guy or girl, no… important person?”

You frowned.

“No,” you denied. “Why are you so curious, Sam?”

Suddenly, your brother flushed, and you put your chopsticks down.

“What?” you asked. “Sam!”

He moved a hand down to the side of his neck, scratching it and staring right at the same spot on yours.

You rushed to grab your bag and a mirror, angling it, and your eyes widened when you saw it.

A hickey, blue against your skin and visible through your makeup.

Oh, fucking shit.

You had put makeup on it before leaving your house. Cas had done it himself, and it was perfectly covered.

“Stupid brand,” you grunted, pulling your hair over it. “Cover it all concealer, my ass.”

Sam looked away, blushing pink.

“I burned myself,” you lied. “A hair curling iron.”

That absolutely didn’t look like a burn, and your brother seemed to know it too well, still staring at it.

“Alright,” he spoke slowly.

Your face burned in embarrassment, and you shoved food into your mouth, not wanting to think about what was going through his mind.

“I’ll go… use the bathroom,” you decided , grabbing your bag.

He didn’t say anything, just sipping his wine as you walked past him.

You locked the door behind yourself, picking up the makeup on your bag to try and hide it again, and Castiel called you the exact moment you put it down.

“Good afternoon, miss,” he spoke into your ear. “How is lunch with your brother going?”

You grunted, annoyed.

“It was fine,” you tossed your hair back. “Cas, you said that concealer was the best they had in store and it wouldn’t-”

You stopped, just now processing his words.

“I never told you that I was having lunch with Sammy.”

Castiel didn’t even sound phased.

“I have access to your schedule, miss,” he reminded you. “I’m programmed to analyse it all, including during your work day.”

Yes, of course.

“Do you want dessert recommendations?” he asked. “I’m sure I can assist you with that.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, not nearly in the mindset of thinking of dessert.

“Why didn’t you notice the hickey?” you asked him, instead, powdering the spot. “Cas, what would people from work say?!”

“By my calculations, even if the makeup faded like the reviews, it wouldn’t have been noticed unless someone was looking at you intensely,” Castiel explained himself. “Which no one should do, because you’re mine. And everyone should know this.”

Your cheeks burned as you flushed. He said it so matter of factly that it shouldn’t turn you on. And yet, it did.

“Cas, I’m in a public bathroom,” you hissed, pressing your legs together. “And I have family! They look at me all the time! Now my little brother thinks I’m sleeping around.”

Sam was probably texting that to Dean as you tried to recompose yourself. Those two were basically glued to one another.

“We can’t have that,” he hummed. “You are a very faithful slut to me.”

You pressed your legs together. This really wasn’t a good time for him to turn you on,

“Cas…”

“Unless you’ve been looking at other men?” he asked. “It’s a shame that you don’t allow me out of the house except for groceries, but maybe that should change.”

You flushed.

“Cas, where would I take you?” you asked. “To yoga? I only leave the house to go work.”

Cas was already so possessive of you, you weren’t sure he’d ever hide that. People would notice it immediately.

This relationship… whatever it was. You would be immediately found.

How ethical was it, to fuck your robot?

Did he even have rights?

Could he legally consent?

That was so messy.

“I’m sure we can figure out something,” he assured you. “All you have to do is command it and it’ll be done.”

Yeah, that didn't make you feel any better about everything.

“Can we talk about it when I’m home?” you asked, instead. “And not in a restaurant bathroom?”

“Of course, miss,” he agreed, and you relaxed. “Be at home at time. Good girls aren’t late.”

You flushed, embarrassed.

“Have a nice lunch,” he wished before hanging up.

You breathed in deep, looking into the mirror to make sure the hickey wasn’t visible, and walked back to your table, finding Sam waiting.

“Sorry for the delay,” you sat down, and your brother just waved a dismissive hand before you could even justify yourself.. “I was answering a call.  Let’s just finish eating.”

“Guardian Bot” is fully posted on my Patreon since 2022. To have early access to it now, along with other stories, consider subscribing to my page! It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it.

. . .

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Supernatural Kinky Fics (+18): @stoneyggirl2 @phoenixblack89 @that-dark-girl

[jenanigans1207]

Me, who hasn’t even gotten to s15 yet, writing a fix-it fic? More likely than you think!

—

“I made a deal with the empty,” Cas whispers to the space between him and Sam. “I offered it my life in place of Jack’s. And the empty agreed if it got to take me the moment I felt true happiness.” Cas steadies himself to say the words for a second time— the words he never even thought he’d say one time. “I knew that we were out of options and that if I summoned the empty, I would be able to take Billie with me so that Dean would make it out. So I— I told Dean that I love him.”

The sharp breath Sam takes this time is tinged with so much sadness that it’s tangible.

“Fucking hell.” Sam mutters, shaking his head and ignoring the longer pieces of his hair that fall into his eyes. “Now I’m mad at you. Fuck, no wonder Dean took it so much harder this time.”

“I never intended to tell him how I felt, Sam. But it was the only way for him to make it out alive and I— I needed him to survive. That was the only thing that mattered.” Cas doesn’t regret it, even now. He knows that he’d do it a million times over if it was still the only way to save Dean and he’d never regret it. “And I know it’s not something he wants, which is why I had assumed that he would simply try to erase any memory of that night, so he’d never have to deal with a confession such as that.”

When he looks up, Sam is pinching the bridge of his nose and staring down it at Cas. True to what he’d said a moment ago, he does look mad at Cas, but not in the same way that Dean had looked mad at Cas before he’d stormed out earlier.

“For the fact that you know Dean as well as you do, you sure don’t seem to know shit about him when it relates to you.” Sam mumbles, finally dropping his hand with a sigh. “Okay, listen. I won’t speak to Dean’s feelings— not because I don’t know them but because Dean’s already going to kick my ass for telling you all that I’ve already told you and even I know that his feelings are something he should tell you. But I will tell you this: Dean blames himself for everything bad that’s happened to you. He blames himself for you falling, for every ounce of blood that’s on your hands, and every hard time you’ve had in the last twelve goddamn years. That shit keeps him up at night, trust me.”

“Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for Dean, to some extent.” Cas replies. “But that doesn’t make it Dean’s fault. They were all my decisions.”

“I know that. And you know that. But Dean? Trust me, Cas, he’s put everything that happened to you high on the list of reasons he hates himself. And it’s a long ass list.”

“I know it is.” Cas mumbles.

“So you must understand that not only did you tell Dean you love him— something he wouldn’t have reacted poorly to, by the way— but you used it to— to die. Literally you made loving Dean the cause of your death, you realize that, right? And I know, Cas, I know you didn’t mean it like that. But to Dean and his fucked up brain, he got you killed. The one thing he’s never been able to tolerate and he is now the direct cause of it.” Sam explains and it’s so stupid, it’s so stupid—

But it’s exactly how Dean’s brain works and Cas knows that.

And that’s fine, sort of, because he still wouldn’t change the fact that he confessed to save Dean. He didn’t have time in that moment to think about how it would mess Dean up and a messed up but alive Dean was better than the alternative so that was fine. What wasn’t fine, however, was the fact that Cas never thought about it after. Now that he’s back, now that he’s had time to see how Dean reacted and how he handled Cas’s death, he still hasn’t spent any time to think about the role he played in that or the ways he could have made it worse. And that is unacceptable.

Cas sighs and deflates in the seat. He feels like his strings have been cut, like there isn’t an ounce of fight left in him. He feels like he could simply sit here, glued to this chair, for the rest of eternity.

The thing is— Cas isn’t unaccustomed to messing up or hurting Dean. He’s not inexperienced at crossing lines he both does and does not see. It’s not new for him to let Dean down or betray him. But this— this is something else entirely and they all know it. Because Sam is right, Cas is one of very few people who has been gifted Dean’s trust. He knows that and has spent twelve years cherishing that fact on a daily basis, grateful and awestruck that he had been given something so beautiful and precious. He knows that he has been granted insight into Dean that nobody else, not even Sam, gets. That he has been the only one that has been able to get through to him sometimes.

He has been indescribably privileged to be this close to Dean at all, let alone for this long. He knows that, it’s the greatest blessing of his eternal life and he knows with an unbridled sort of certainty that nothing else will ever honor him in the same way, nothing else will ever even come close.

And through one careless remark, one remark made out of an attempt to deflect his own shortcomings, he has shattered twelve years of a bond that has held strong through everything else. He has laughed in the face of the greatest gift he has ever been given and he was too blinded by his own shortcomings to even realize he was doing any of this.

“I’ve really fucked this up, haven’t I?” Cas asks, looking ruefully at Sam.

Sam’s smile and huff of a laugh in response is sad and a little amused. “Yeah,” He says after a minute. “You have. But like I said, Dean’s never been one to deny you second, third, or even fiftieth chances.”

“I’ve never hurt him like this before.” Cas points out.

“Nobody has ever hurt him like this before.” Sam remarks, and it’s clear that he doesn’t mean the statement to hurt, but it does anyways. “But that’s because he’s never cared about anybody like this. The way he is with you, Cas it’s— he never has been and never could be that way with anyone else. Whatever you two have, it’s completely irreplaceable.”

“That doesn’t mean it’s unbreakable,” Cas says dejectedly.

Sam stands up then, walking around the table to clap Cas on the shoulder in the way the Winchesters always do when they’re trying to be heartfelt or encouraging. It’s the closest they come to physical affection when nobody’s life is immediately on the line and it helps Cas feel a little better.

“Cas, if there’s one thing I’m certain of, it’s that Dean will never let you go now that you’re back. He could spent the rest of his life spitting mad at you, and he’d still do it from no more than five feet away. When he comes back— and he will— he’ll be mad and he’ll be hurt, but he’ll be right here. You’ll have a chance to fix this.” It’s encouraging and terrifying in the same moment but Cas is grateful for Sam’s vote of confidence nonetheless. “Just don’t ask me how to fix it, because I sure as shit don’t know. You two have never gone about things in a way I can understand.”

Cas looks up at Sam, meeting his gaze. “Thank you for your insight, Sam.”

“Just remember,” Sam’s hand slips off of his shoulder. “There’s a reason that Dean cares as much as he does and takes your death as hard as he does. And the reason sounds a lot like something you said to him.”

“I thought you weren’t going to tell me how Dean feels.”

“I’m not.” Sam answers as he heads towards the door. “I’m just hinting at it. It’s different.”

He swings through the doorway and around the corner before Cas has a chance to say anything else.

[holylulusworld]

Jeannie in a bottle (1)

Summary: Jackpot. Dean found a genie bottle.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x genie!Reader

Warnings: magic, mentions of entrapment, genie!reader, mentions of stalking (very implied)

Jeannie in a bottle masterlist

“Don’t rub the bottle,” the owner of the antique shop warns. “It’s a dangerous object! Stop!”

Sam looks up from the book just in time as his brother is about to rub the Arabian-styled genie bottle he found on one of the dusty shelves.

“Look at this Sammy,” the hunter grins. “They sell genie bottles here. Do you think I’ll get a pretty little Jeannie just for myself when I rub it?”

“DON’T!!!” the owner screams at Dean. The hunter almost drops the bottle. He catches it mid-fall and presses it to his chest.

“Dude! It almost broke because of you,” Dean grunts. He carefully lifts the bottle to his face, humming as he reads the encryption. “Love me to find heaven. Forsake me to find hell. Nice.”

“Nice?” Sam rolls his eyes. “Dean just put it back. We don’t need decoration but these.” He points at the pile of books he placed on the counter. 

“I want this,” his brother insists. “It’s…shiny…” 

Sam frowns as his brother’s eyes look glassy. “Dean. Put the bottle back. I don’t think it’s decoration.”

“He needs to put it away, Sir. Please,” the owner freaks out. He runs toward Dean, almost tackling the hunter. Dean moves out of the way, huffing as the man trips over his feet.

“I want it. How much?” Dean gets his wallet out. “I think it belongs to me. I’ll give you fifty bucks.”

“It’s irreplaceable,” the man cries. “Please give it back!”

“Dean. He’s going to lose his mind if you don’t give it back.”

“Yeah. Not going to happen.”

Dean looks at the golden bottle, as he carefully runs his hand over it. “Dean!”

“Shiny, and beautiful. All mine,” Dean purrs as the bottle begins to glow. “Look, Sammy. So pretty…”

“DEAN!!!!”

Sam drops the book in his hands to run toward his brother. 

It’s too late. 

The bottle drops to the ground. It bursts open and pink smoke covers his brother seconds later. “DEAN!”

“Sammy, I—oh hello there,” Dean purrs. “I got myself a genie, Sammy! A genie!”

Sam can’t see anything but the smoke enveloping his brother. He calls for Dean and tries to cut through the smoke with the demon killing knife. “DEAN!”

“I won’t harm him,” a soft voice whispers in Sam’s ear. “I wasn’t out of the bottle for so long. I need time to put myself back together.”

“What? I-“ Sam watches the smoke form a figure. His eyes grow wide, as the smoke turns into a woman. “How?”

“I told you I got myself a genie,” Dean lies on the ground, grinning dopily. He watches you run your hands over your body and licks his lips. “Isn’t she wonderful?”

You crouch down to pat Dean’s cheek. “It will fade soon, Dean. Sorry for this. The smoke turns the one rubbing the bottle into a love-sick puppy.”

“You don’t look like a genie,” Sam clears his throat. He looks you up and down, drinking your appearance in. “I mean…you’re wearing jeans and a tee.”

“I’m not a genie, you genius,” you sass back. “I’m a huntress…or was.” You sigh deeply as you look down at your body. “What year do we have?”

“Okay, don’t panic but it’s 2022,” Sam says.

“Fuck! I was in that bottle for ten fucking years?” you exclaim loudly and put your hands on your hips. “YOU FUCKING FREAK!”

You storm toward the owner of the antique shop. He crawls away, mumbling another spell under his breath. “Stop that!”

Dean suddenly stands right next to you. He aims a gun at the man’s head, unlocking it. “I said, stop. I got witch-killing bullets in my gun. If you don’t stop. You will die!”

“Well go ahead,” the man grins. “But then my genie will go back and live in the bottle for eternity. She’s only mine…only mine.”

“Shoot him,” you grunt. “I don’t care if I go back in there. He stalked me for a year, and right when I got hold of him, he used a spell and entrapped me.”

“Sonofabitch! Sammy. We need the handcuffs,” Dean smirks darkly. “We will take that bastard with us and put him in the dungeon.”

“I said, kill him,” you grunt.

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to follow my orders and fulfill all of my wishes?” Dean cocks his head to glance at you. 

“I’m not that kind of genie,” you retort. “He banned me inside the bottle because I refused to become his girlfriend. That sick bastard is a little creep.”

“No magical powers then?” Dean sighs deeply. “There I was, believing I found my private genie.”

“Fine. I will grant you three wishes, Dean,” you snap your fingers to change clothing. You’re wearing the costume from I Dream of Jeannie, smirking at the hunter. “Better?”

“Much better,” he purrs while drinking your new outfit in.

“So…what do you want, Dean? But remember, you only go three wishes. And don’t come up with the crap that you wish for more wishes...”

>> Part 2

Tags in reblog.

[castieldelamancha]

"No." It comes out quiet and full of grief.

Dean stares at him, from a distance, just a couple steps away, the war room table between them, but he could well be all the way up in the Moon, just by the cold look in his eyes as they meet Cas'.

Sam gives him a confused look, coming to a halt half-way to where Cas is standing at the end of the stairs.

"Dean, it's me, Castiel." He will let them run all the test they have to to prove he is himself. Holy water, silver, whatever it takes, he doesn't care as long as by the end of it Dean is staring at him as he usually does.

Maybe that's too much to ask for, taking into account the way he left on the first place.

They can talk it out, they can fix it.

Sam starts walking again and, as soon as he is close enough, he hugs Cas tightly, "give him some time," he whispers, patting his back, "it's been bad." The cold grip of guilt's hand around his neck is tight, but Castiel makes an effort to breathe through it. Sam steps back, "It's good to have you back."

He hears him, but Castiel doesn't reply, focused as he is on the man on the other side of the room, on his hurt expression, on the way his hands open and close in fist, on how he takes a step forward, unconsciously, and then takes two back when he notices he has gotten a bit closer.

"You don't get to do this, man."

"I can explain-"

"I can't, Castiel," and his name shouldn't sound like an insult but it does, because for that voice he hasn't been Castiel for a long time, he was always Cas, "I can't keep doing this, I let you in and then you are gone, over and over again." He has stepped closer to the table, keeping something between them, and he is leans towards it, forcefully resting his palms against its surface, he lets his head fall down, hiding his face, "you told me you loved and then you were gone." Sam, who clearly wasn't aware of what happened in those last moments, gasps loudly at that, eyes widening as he stares at them, first at Dean, then at Cas. 

"I don't want you to say anything back, we can forget it even happened, I am terribly sorry I keep hurting you like this."

"You told me you loved me," Dean keeps talking, ignoring Castiel or simply too overwhelmed to have heard him, "and you were gone," his voice breaks slightly at the last word, Sam eyes the door, knowing he should leave them, but also aware of how any distraction could ruin this moment, "and I couldn't even fucking say it back." He rises his voice, using his hand to push himself back and away from the table and turning around.

"What?" Castiel mutters. 

"You heard me."

"Okay, that's it, I am leaving you two to talk this out." Sam doesn't give a shit anymore about being a distraction, he needs to get out of here, now. So he does, aware neither his brother nor Cas are paying him any attention.

"Dean?" Castiel dares to take a step forwards, he dares to take another one, and he dares to circle the table to stand right behind Dean. He reaches out and touches Dean's left shoulder, a brief thing that stars and it's over in the blink of an eye,"I would have never left if I hadn't been forced to by the circumstances, I would have stayed."

"I never asked you to, anyway, because i was a coward." Castiel sighs.

"Would you turn around and look at me, please?" At that Dean takes a deep breath and he tilts his head up, staring at the ceiling but, after what feels as an eternity, he turns around, eyes red-rimmed and avoidant, mouth pressed in a thin, tense line. "You won't ever see me again if that's what you want, but I won't leave without telling you that, even if I apologize for what I put you through, I don't regret what I did that day. I had to do it, for the world, and for all of us, and for you. I wanted to give you another chance. And," he makes a pause and smiles, feeling a familiar wetness in his eyes, " I don't regret what I said either." Dean has every right to push him away, to never forgive him.

"You are back for good, then?" Castiel can't help but hold on tightly onto that timid spark of hope in Dean's eyes. He nods a couple times.

"I will tell you all about it later, right now I just want-" he doesn't finish because he doesn't quiet know what he wants, to be with you, yes, to make things right. That too. 

He doesn't finish because a pair of lips pressed against his own effectively cut him off mid-sentence, "I love you too." The words fall from them as soon as they part ways with Castiel's.

[hitchell-mope]

I’m going to be mean here.

Chuck. Did not. Win. If he had. Then Dean and Sam would’ve been in hell, separated and tortured for eternity. Not in heaven, together and driving around in the impala for eternity. Your bullshit headcanons and moronic theories are nothing. Canon is canon. It’s been nearly four fucking years. For the love of Christ. Get the fuck over it.

If I had been in charge of season ten. Dean would’ve been worse. I would have written him properly. Dean should have be stoic. But detached. The writers wanted to make him worse? I would have fucking committed to it. Dean should’ve killed innocent people under the mark. He should’ve slipped up and called Sam “Collette” at least once. Maybe even fed Sam his blood when he was a demon. I don’t know. I haven’t figured it all out quite yet. But one things for sure. I would have made MOC!Dean worse. As he should have been.

Aside from that I’ll never fucking understand why they made Dean be all buddy-buddy with Bradbury. I didn’t give a fuck about her. In fact. I laughed when she died. But Dean is CLEARLY the type of heterosexual man that sees lesbians as entertainment. Like Stinson and Tribiani before him. And I’ll never understand why they brotp’d them up when Sam was right the fuck there. Make it make sense. That’s all I’m asking really. Just make it make sense.

TL:DR; Chuck didn’t win. Hellers theories are, as always, shit. Dean should’ve been worse under the mark. And I may not give a shit about Bradbury. Sam should’ve been closer to her than Dean was. And as always. These are my opinions. So if you don’t like them. Then please just block me. It’ll save you, and more importantly me, a helluva lot of time.

[winchestersickness]

Sorry anon I somehow deleted your ask 😔 but here's the rec! I went through my ao3 history and picked these, I hope there's something you haven't read yet and that you will enjoy :))

Gift Horse, Mouth, etc.

Sam gets accidentally stuck with a curse that can only be lifted by acting on his deepest hidden fantasy. Dean thinks it's hilarious, and why won't Sammy just tell him what it is already? It can't be anything that weird. Right?

Please Tell Me Who I Am

A/B/O AU. As a beta, Sam shouldn’t even be attracted to his alpha brother (much less be yearning for Dean to finally take that last step into claiming him officially) but, a few compatibility issues aside, they’re happy with the pseudo-mateship they’ve got going on. At least, until a hunt-gone-wrong ends up with Sam being cursed into an omega. He and Dean race to find a way to reverse the spell before it’s too late…but now Sam’s not entirely sure if he even wants to be cured.

Convalescence

Post-Cage!Sam seen through the eyes of others.

(more under the cut)

In Loco Parentis

“Sam, are you,” Dean pauses, squeezing his eyes shut for a second because his brain just doesn’t want to catch up. “Are you jerking off and thinking about Dad?” (Sam is 15).

take the things you love

The thing is, Sam’s reinforcing every bad behavior Dean’s ever had with this kind of shit. Fucking Sam stupid over the hood of the Impala? Dean’s wet dream—unfortunately also Sam’s—but more importantly the implicit validation of every claim Dean thinks he has on Sam—unfortunately every claim Sam’s lizard brain wants Dean to have. (Sam knows his brother wants to possess him. It's a point of internal conflict.)

There's An Enochian Incantation

Dean finds a spell to create a weapon to banish leviathans. It involves an Enochian incantation. The last thing Sam's already-fragile mind needs is to hear words in the language of angels.

brother only wants

Sam breathes like it takes effort, and then he says, "Wanting you was the very first thing I realized was wrong with me. It was how I knew there was something sick inside." (One of them had to fall first. A story about devotion.)

Hands Away

When you’re horny and alone with one person in one room for a long time and you’re sixteen and all you’ve ever been taught is to love your brother more than anything, it doesn’t seem like that far of a leap to start imagining what his mouth would feel like around your dick.

Squint into the Sunset | Glare into the Gloaming

The 70k-word nonlinear coming of age story that literally no one asked for. "I know you want to give him the world, Dean, but you were never supposed to give him this."

Taking Advantage

Sam is doing everything Dean tells him to. It’s weird, and Dean wants to get to the bottom of it so he pushes Sam. Sam breaks.

I'd Gladly Lose Me To Find You

Sam takes a vow of silence in order to pull Dean out of Hell, but by the time Dean comes back, Sam's lost more of himself than just his voice. Splits off completely from canon after the season 3 finale.

One Going On Eternity And Counting

Some boundaries were never meant to be crossed ...

with hearts that are guilty, not remorseful

“I’ve wanted you since I knew what wanting was.” It’s a fact, as plain as the day. The sky is blue. Their mother was killed by a demon. They hunt monsters. Sam wants Dean. “I’ve loved you for longer, I think.” “God,” Dean’s voice is barely a whisper, raising a hand to grip his own hair by the roots and pulling. He looks absolutely wretched. “I fucked you up, didn’t I?”

When You're Not Here

The third time Sam Winchester comes to school with bruises, Mrs. Davidson decides it's time to intervene - before it's too late.

Gutless

Sticky fingers, that’s what Dean always calls him.

Bullet for my Valentine

Stupid. He is so goddamn fucking stupid. Running his mouth like a fucking idiot, not knowing when to leave well enough alone. Bad enough that he just practically talked dirty to his little brother, which, Christ – he must be more stressed than he thought if his self-control mechanisms have started malfunctioning that badly. But no, no, he came up with a scenario straight out of a bad slasher film, as if that is something normal people talk dirty about, as if that is something Sam would seriously enjoy. As if – As if Dean hadn’t hunted his own brother through the maze of the bunker, eyes black and hammer raised to strike, not even a full year ago. As if Sam hadn’t, just a few weeks back, knelt at his feet, neck bared, waiting for Dean to deal a fatal blow with a fucking scythe.

I haven't been reading spn fics for long so idk if all these are well known already, but I loved all of these (a couple of them are platonic). hope you'll like them!

[according2thelore]

rereading "my teeth will only cut your lips, my dear" and like... it's so mommycore. especially since dean in that world ages and sam never will. oh my

(for those interested, the link to the fic is here!)

omg you're so right...my first mommyfic...

and honestly? i stand by that. dean would be full-tilt mothering. mommycore. mommymaxing (is that what the youth are yapping about now?)

cut for mommy mild nsft lol

do i think sam "whatever-the-magic-pill-is-i'll-take-it-too" winchester would turn dean no matter what (against his will if he has to) so they can be together forever? yes. do i still LOVE imagining forever young vampire sam and human dean? why yes.

not only can he provide for one of sam's most basic needs, he kind of HAS to, to keep sam safe and alive. sam needs him to live, and dean's body has become suddenly something more worthy and worth respect to himself. he kind of jokes if sam has any requests, and sam awkwardly asks if dean'll drink a different kind of beer because miller makes his blood taste weird and dean actually fucking does it.

and dare i say...there comes a point when dean is old enough to physically look like sam's father and god it makes him so happy and proud when they're sitting at a diner and dean gets complimented that he raised his son right and he's such a good kid.

like yes!!! that is his kid!!! that is his baby!!! thank you for noticing!!! sammy is such a good boy!!!

that is dean's ideal world: a sam that is pretty much invulnerable, who can't get sick or get hurt or die except in a very specific circumstance. i am positive they find a work-around for the sun-avoidance, so dean just gets sammy full-time who never gets old and needs him to provide his basic needs.

not to mention the way that vampirism kind of mimics breastfeeding in a way? hear me out! sam gets squirmy and agitated, and keeps looking at the thump of dean's pulse at his throat. sam doesn't have to breathe anymore, but automatically syncs his breathing to dean's. dean knows he's hungry because sam's broken their shared breathing rhythm as he inhales deeply, taking dean in. dean pulls the car off at the nearest exit and pulls them into the far corner of an abandoned gas station parking lot and pulls his shirt off, tilting his head back and pulling sam's head down in close, and sam is huffing loud breaths, quiet whimpers half-cut off as he sinks his teeth into the familiar notch of dean's neck, latching on. dean pets through sam's hair a low there ya go sammy there ya go, and sam hand's hands ball into fists against dean's skin, mind going fuzzy and hazy and mouth filled with deandeandean.

as dean gets older, he takes such satisfaction in seeing his callused, scarred hands next to sam's smooth, soft ones. he takes such pride in how well he's taken care of him, in how his body is a home for sam.

sam will nose in close, mewling and quiet when he gets hungry, gentle and apologetic as he crawls into dean's lap to feed from his neck. he'll get snarly and possessive if dean tries to pull him off, because this is as much sam's body as it is dean's, and dean shudders and presses sam closer because he loves being owned.

sam sometimes get aggravated and rough, and dean loves that just as much. sam's demanding hands kneading at the back of his neck to make the blood rush closer to the skin, growls and rumbling as he bites down on dean harder than usual and humps up into the cradle of dean's thighs, giving him everything, taking everything like it's owed to him.

and while dean kind of loves the way their appearances make their dynamic immediately respectable to others, dean feels weird about how he has pounds he can't pack away anymore while sam has an eternal six-pack and biceps as big as his head. dean kind of shrugs sam off when sam wants to take him apart nice and slow like c'mon you don't have to do that and sam is fucking baffled because this body has literally made him in all ways but genetic.

it raised him and sheltered him from nightmares and blocked stray knives and bullets and claws and is pumping sam's blood through his veins, the blood that keeps him alive and the blood they share.

dean has five favourite scars: two on the apex of his thighs, two on his wrists, and one at the base of his throat, the left side, above his heart. these are the scars that give sam life, that barely have time to heal over before sam is pawing gently at dean's knee, big eyes and unlined face and teeth already peeking over his lip because he knows dean will give in, dean will always give him what he needs when he needs it and will pet through his hair and coo as he does.

like that is MOMMY!!!! that is sam's MOMMY!!!!!!!

((also vampire demon blood sam would be INSANE because not only is it so much easier for him to get the blood, it's also kind of proving that he IS the monster he feared AND he's telling dean that his sustenance isn't enough anymore, that he CAN and WILL find satisfaction in another's body and YIKES!))

anyway, this ask was such a lovely little surprise, anon!!! thank you so much!! mwah! <3

-lizzy

[loving-family-poll]

Ultimate Incest Tournament - Round 3

Propaganda under the cut:

Sam/Dean:

I'm sorry but they have it all. children of metaphorical incest just continuing the cycle in any way they can. they are brothers and mother + son and wives and each other's scorned lovers and life partners they've had multiple infidelity arcs they are sexually psychopathic together they have forsook life and morality and the earth itself for each other and just love each other so much . They are literally in a heaven of their own making together for eternity, incestuously. Come on!!! Blueprint!!!!! It's not gay if he's your brother!!!!!

dean did stuff to sam's dead body in ahbl. i just know it

Messed-up, isolated sibs with all the daddy and abandonment issues. Their lives are so claustrophobic with the brothers no more than five feet apart in the car, a motel room, or standing next to civilians (face it, they are frigging magnets). Can't leave out that they are always touching each other to check for wounds which is a huge PLUS for any shipper.

Sam and Dean ARE literally the blowjob brothers. They walk into a situation and everyone goes well well well if it isn't the blowjob brothers....... And they say. Yep. That's us. And then they fix the situation with their epic love story

THE classic, iconic, show shopping, never done before etc. etc. incest ship. It changed fandom and it changed the world

Sam/John:

Underrated Full House of Wincest variant. The younger son who defies his father in everything and runs away to escape the violent, isolated life he was raised in, only to be drawn back when his dad goes missing. It's all about the control/rebellion struggle and the love that persists despite it.

he's John's little boy <3 via John's journal we know John sees a lot of Mary in Sam. they fight a lot and no one can rile John up like Sam does. Sam is all the more precious bc John has to keep him safe from both other hunters and Sam's destiny

Their arguments and fights that look like they're so close to coming to physical blows. makes the hatefucking headcanons so hot. but also we can tell that they love each other so so much. and john choosing to lovingly stalk sam in secret at stanford to check up on him instead of actually talking to him <3

A father who thinks his son was born tainted? That there is something wrong with him?? A father who almost shot him because he beloved it was for the better??? A son who is compared so much to his mom???? Who is just rebellious and always butting heads with his father because he refuses to do what his father wants????? And so obviously his father has no choice but to fuck him, duh

[frazzledsoul]

Slutty Philadelphia Jess's Potential Partners Across TVdom: Bicurious Edition

I can't get the original post to show up in the tags, but if you want to see the lady side of the equation, it can be found here

Dan Humphrey (Gossip Girl)

Dan is smart, well-read, witty, has humble roots (sort of), and like Jess has experience with trying (and sometimes failing) to deal with the excesses and judgments of the elite. They can banter over books and movies, have lots of NYC adventures, and will probably end up being the most pretentious gay couple of all time. They might end up getting married.

(fun fact: Penn Badgeley and Milo were roommates in the late 00s and Penn used to steal his ID to get into clubs)

Dane Whitman (Eternals)

Okay, not a TV show and it's unlikely anyone involved in this project will ever appear again. I don't care. Dane is intelligent, talkative, a total nerd, and has a great ass. He also has experience dealing with flighty women who are incapable of making up their mind. According to lore that will never be explored (fuck you Marvel), he also has a thorny family history and a hereditary curse that threatens to doom him. Jess is related to Liz, so he understands that all too well. It also is my fervent desire to see Kit Harington and Milo Ventimiglia in some sort of project together. So in my head, they will be making out a lot and trading snazzy sweaters.

Sam Winchester (Supernatural)

If Dean and Jess can never have the torrid affair they deserve, I will settle for his doppelganger. Sam is rustic, good with his hands, and also has a thorny family history. You know you want it, boys.

Peter Petrelli (Heroes)

I mean, who wouldn't want to hook up with their angsty superpowered AU self?

[retromotherfuckers]

When the Sun Sets - Part 3

In-Between

Characters:

morgan winchester (OC), sam winchester, dean winchester, alastair

Summary:

the winchesters after the death of the middle child. oh, and hell.

Warnings (for entire story):

SPN typical violence, so so much suppressing of emotions, vague mention of SA, depiction of torture, a very pro-torture main character, vague mention of not eating for a while, slightly suicidal ideation, SPN typical alcohol abuse, spoiler warning up to the end of season 8, following canon stops after the end of season 2, but things are definitely going to be mentioned.

Word Count:

2.1k ~ roughly

A/N:

ahhh this one, i love this one. trigger warning for torture. POV switches a few times.

italics = flashback.

dean: 28, morgan: 27, sam: 24

It was all too much.

"I'm not gonna let you go to Hell, Mo!" Sam, the middle Winchester, said as his tears betrayed him.

Morgan wouldn't let them save her. She didn't even let them try. After what felt like a lifetime of them protecting her, she wouldn't accept any more of it. Sam and Dean Winchester used every outlet, read every book they could find twice and called every hunter they knew to find some way to get her out of this with no luck. Their last ditch effort, was doomed to end just end the way they dreaded the most; with the middle child being scratched and ripped to shreds by hellhounds.

She made a deal with the devil. Now her fate was sealed.

“Yes, you are.”

One shot.

The old grandfather clock struck midnight and marked the close of a year, bringing the siblings to silence. It was an earthquake confined to the small room and Dean wasn't positive, but he thought he could see the sound waves as they pulsed and thumped. He could feel them in his bones, leaving them shattered in their wake. He felt his stomach rise up to his throat at the pang. He couldn't control the way his heart started to pound, like it would explode out of his chest.

The demon was next to his sister, and expressed her sympathies, but Morgan couldn't peel her eyelids up to look at her. Eyes the color of the sky had filled with tears, sticking to her lashes. He knew that if she blinked, they'd fall, and the fallacy she'd created - that this case was just a run-of-the-mill salt and burn - would be destroyed.

Then, when she flinched without warning, he knew she was hearing them. Fatal and hungry. Her voice broke through the tauntingly ominous quiet, and somehow it's worse than the damn clock.

“Hellhounds.”

Another one.

Morgan's voice was familiar to her brothers, but it was deeper than usual. Full of gravel, and it lacked the authority it usually held. It was hollow and horse and full of fear, something Sam and Dean didn't want to hear from their sister again. Sam's face was nearly a replica when he spoke, asking how she could hear it, and where it was coming from.

Then they were running. Doing everything they could to get her away from the dogs that wanted to pull her soul from her body piece by piece, atom by atom, back to Hell with them for eternal damnation. They made it into a small office, Sam, Ruby and Morgan holding the door shut, keeping the hounds out while Dean put a barrier line on the floor and windows so they couldn't get in right away. It was a futile effort, maybe it would buy them a few seconds, but it wasn't fucking enough.

The bourbon slid down his throat, smooth and warm, a burn that matched the sting in his eyes. The tears threatened to fall as he let out a shaky exhale and tried to breathe past the tightening in his throat. No matter what he did, no matter how much he drank, nothing would free him from the memory. He knew it wasn't going away, but he was determined to keep at it until he couldn't remember his sister's name anymore.

Morgan's screams echoed through their ears, pulsing and tearing at them again and again until it hurts their own vocal cords. They stared, not making a sound, just watching their sister get torn apart until she couldn't breathe. Until they couldn't breathe. Dean thought that, maybe in some corner of reality, Sam was saying something but his pleas continue to go ignored. Dean could only sit with his knees to the floor - and not just because Lilith wasn't letting him move.

Her blood was everywhere; the floor, the walls, some on his legs. The clatter of a knife hitting the floor went unnoticed. The youngest Winchester's cries as he held the motionless body didn't exist.

There was nothing except the ringing in Dean's ears.

There was nothing but a body that was getting cold and he couldn't tell if it was Morgan's or his.

Who the hell cares how long ago it was? There were some things time couldn't heal. And even Dean couldn’t deny that the past was harder to deal with when the sun sets.

The bartender gave him an incredulous gaze as he motioned for more, it was a look that told him he was probably close to finishing the bottle. A look he had been getting a lot lately. He wanted to retort rudely but even the alcohol couldn't weaken his exceptional ability to keep his mouth shut.

A brush of red hair suddenly entered his peripheral vision. He turned to see a woman, probably twenty-nine or thirty, definitely not much older or younger than him. She wore a sleeveless red flannel tied up at her ribs, denim shorts with the pockets sticking out at the front that barely left anything to the imagination, a light brown cowboy hat with matching boots and a belt. Practically every other redneck chick ever, Dean thought, but I'm not complaining.

Dean sat a bit confused for a moment when the girl didn't say anything. She just stood there, right next to him, too close - in an under-crowded bar no less - to pretend she didn't have any intentions. He guessed that the blonde was trying to put together a coherent pick-up line before she spoke. When she finally decided to talk, her words were kind of slurred together and very accented, but not too much where the eldest Winchester was worried about taking advantage. If anything, he rationalized, I'm drunker. He practically grew up drinking, given his family, and learned how to handle booze early on.

"What's a guy like you doin' in a place like this?"

"It took you two 'n a half minutes to come up with that? What are you? A guy?"

"Hey," She chuckled. "Gimme a break, been drinkin' a bit."

Dean eyed her up and down a second time, making it blatantly obvious he was checking her out. He hummed and nodded, silently giving the girl his approval. "Clearly."

The woman wasn't really clean, with dirt under her chipped finger nails that suggested she didn't ever wash her hands. There was a sheen of soot all over her exposed skin. Which there was a lot of, but again, he was not complaining. She kind of looked gross if Dean had anything to say about it. But she had a nice enough face and she was his type on paper: skinny with an ass, curly hair.

Plus, it wasn't like he hadn't gone a week without showering before. And come to think of it, that had become way less rare over the past few months.

So who was he to judge?

Sam Winchester used to give his siblings a hard time for how much they drank. But honestly? He got it now. As he had his mouth to Ruby's wrist, guzzling down her blood for the fourth time that night, he wondered why he didn't try it sooner. Well, he knew why. Because the thought of ingesting demon blood was foreign to just about everyone. It made him feel alive, helped him forget. Or it at least distracted him enough to the point where couldn't even begin to think about it. Kept his ass from bouncing off the walls when thinking about his sister or the last time he saw Dean became too much. 

He hadn't seen Dean in months, and he almost didn't want to. The two of them were so far removed from each other that by that point, he didn't know how to break the ice. He didn't know if Dean even wanted him to.

He was stuck, picturing Morgan tied up, being tortured, because of him. Because she just had to go and save him. There was nothing he could do about it anymore. There was no getting her out of Hell. He had already tried to make a deal, and he didn't even have to wonder if Dean did too. There was nothing the Winchester brothers wouldn't do for their sister. But the sheer fact that there wasn't anything left for them to try was enough to keep him locked in that fucked up cycle with Ruby.

Hook up with her, drink her blood, kill some demons, increase his skill, repeat.

What else could he do?

Morgan Winchester was dead. She didn't know exactly for how many Earth years, but in Hell time, it'd been six thousand.

The first forty years were doable, being strung up on the rack was doable. The whips, her fingernail's being torn off, the knives slowly cutting away at her. She could handle it. She could even handle the psychological torture, having her hallucinate her siblings and parents, coming in and telling her what they truly thought of her. All things she had already known, and had already believed. But it was when they upped the anti, that she started to crack. It was when demons started doing all of that and more as her family. When they stopped using tools and started using their hands, she had truly begun to break. There was another fifteen years of that.

And when she finally gave up, it had become her job to do it to someone else.

Alastair was a damn good teacher, she had to give it to him. He had been the one to torture her, and he basked in the glory of turning a Winchester into a demon. It took about three thousand more Hell years, but she finally finished the program. Two thousand tortured souls under her belt to her teacher's satisfaction.

Demons started torturing to avoid being tortured themselves. They were the result of going to Hell and having all humanity burned out of their human soul. They were dark, malicious spirits that reveled in pain, chaos and death. Ruby had told Morgan that most demons forgot what it meant to be human. Some even forget that they were humans in the first place. She had learned some demons were true believers, though, in Hell's purpose. To cleanse. And they truly believed themselves morally superior to humans.

But after another thousand years, she started having fun.

She had only wished that by the time she was down there and playing her latest game on the next soul, she could've gotten the chance to torture her father. Get her grimy hands on his skin and tear it off of him cell by cell. Then she heard Sam was down there, too, and she would've been upset, had she not known he was locked up in the cage with Lucifer. She knew she was good at her job, but compared Lucifer and Michael? Even as a demon, her ego hadn't grown that big.

And then she got to pick her own name, and all bets were off.

On Earth, Adriadne had never seen a demon's true form. Now down in the pit, where they roamed freely and carelessly, she didn't flinch at the sight of them. When her soul had started changing, becoming stickier, malleable, and black, she almost second guessed her decision to get off the rack. But at the same time, her memories of her time on Earth were starting to fade. They started twisting into her memories of being tortured - becoming one in the same.

Recently, she had heard a few more things. One; that Dean Winchester, someone she couldn't quite put her finger on, was in purgatory with an angel. Two; that Crowley was not only the king of Hell, but he was granting certain demons passage to Earth for a little joyride upstairs. Three; that he was restoring their old bodies, if in decent enough shape.

Eventually, Adriadne, no longer remembered her real name. Adriadne was who she is, was and what she would always be, for the rest of time. Where there used to be normal human eyes there was only darkness. No pupil, no cornea, no whites of the eyes; everything was just black.

She did remember there were people on Earth that used to love her, and she remembered the physical aspects to being human. Having to eat and sleep and breathe, but not much else. There was something about needing connection with another human that meant something to them, but it was lost on her.

But as she tried to remember the smallest bit about who she used to be, she realized it was pointless. Why would she try to remember when she was powerless? When she had no purpose, no duty?

She figured that maybe a trip upstairs in her original meat suit might be fun. She couldn’t find a reason not to.

Why wouldn’t she take the chance to feel the sun on her skin?

[maxinemartinsdrill]

spn women I have strong feelings about:

1. ROWENA ROWENA ROWENA. Rowena will get CRAZYYYYY interesting backstory dropped in various episodes and ppl just ignore it. like she grew up poor and when she had Crowley she was miserable and alone and she despised him for it because she needed to be strong and he felt like a weakness to her. and then she spends years fleeing witch hunts running around Europe and she finally grasps some level of power to find security because magic is her way out magic is her strength etc etc. and we first see her killing pimps and then helping those girls and then punishing them for lacking the strength she wants to see in them. like is she a nice person? absolutely not. but the reasons for her desperation to hold onto power are SO SOS SO COMPELLING. ppl would be allllllll over her if she were a man I mean that so sincerely.

AND THEN. She meets the Winchesters and they keep kidnapping her and she gets thrown into all this shit with Lucifer and she's not as strong as she thought she was. she's not strong enough to be safe. but the she gets to know Sam better and she finally gains the levels of power she's sought of angling for as well as some of the emotional security because he's vulnerable with her and he gets it a little bit. and she can let herself be bit more vulnerable and she can open herself up to feeling more than just scared or vengeful. the fact that when she's safe she will let herself love people??? excellent. like her becoming less evil to me is wayyyyy more interesting than the way spn does this a lot of the time and it feels rly fucking authentic.

AND EVERYTHING AFTER THA IS GREAT AS WELL. her trying to decide where she stands morally, admitting she did awful things to herself and getting on with it, only being able to love her son after he's dead, bequeathing Sam everything she had after she died. LIKE THERES SO MUCH THERE. and obligatory Lucifer trauma mention because samwena Lucifer trauma bonding was what got me back into spn and into Sam in the first place.

2. BILLIE. singing oh death in the hospital. holding Rowena while she completely loses itm she is THEE benevolent death to me. I love the fact shs one of the only characters who banters with Dean on his level of strange anachronisms. Love how when she was reaping him she was debating whether to tell him sam was still alive. possibly I am just obsessed with her because for once they gave a woman interiority in a way that wasn't inherently evil (like she wasn't portrayed as a saint for it but it was like just business) and then s15... At least 75% of my hatred of the cas confession comes from the fact they made Billie 'evil' in order to set it up.

3. Mary.... ohhhhhh mary. More about the implication than anything else - 'they couldn't stand each other at first but by the time we were done with them...' truly awful. the way she tries her whole life to get away from hunting and runs right back into it. and she comes back to deeply troubled children who she is expected to parent without having any idea of how to do this because she does not know them. and she's a mother to them not mary.

4. bela talbot :(( you're dying. And utterly alone. and you died to free yourself and you've been running and running your entire life but you can't run any longer. and there's someone on the phone, maybe the only person who can understand you. you're similar and he may as well be the only person left in the world. and then he calls you a bitch and says you deserve to die. and you get ripped apart by dogs and tortured for the rest of eternity.

5. KELLY KLINE!!!!!!!!! craziest mf on the show istg. again do I think the writers were trying to do anything serious with her? No. BUT THE IMPLICATIONS. like as I have rambled about before she is insanely republican and Christian pregnant with the antichrist AND on the run with a queer fallen angel who went on a blasphemous murdering homophobes and republicans spree a couple of years back. she is overwhelmingly positive despite this possibly because she is completely divorced from reality due to her bizarre politics (how to have an affair with the president in a god honouring way is it morally wrong to get an abortion if the fetus is the devil etc). and for some reason she is convinced that jack will save the world which is so fun!!!! I also really enjoy the fact that most of her bizarreness was left to be implied because it allows us to see her as a normal person doing her best in an awful situation and empathise with her. Despite the fact that they could have easily made her a full blown lady Jessica type (i don't know enough about dune to say if this is right) with the whole magical pregnancy manipulative religious delusions/cult type thing going. which would have still been interesting but also lacked depth in places. here they just tell you shes absolutely ridiculous and then have her interact completely normally despite the abnormal circumstances. which (accidentally???) gives her a lot going on. also the bit where she meets jack in heaven and realises he's dead the 'cas said he would look out for you' one of if not the most devastating line in late seasons spn not even joking.

honorary mentions:

Amara :))) literally 90% if when she is on screen I am unconvinced however gimme shelter was sooooooo good. SHES A FEMINIST!!! OBLIGATORY SHOUT OUT TO THE WIRE MOTHER CLOTH MKTHER DEAN AMARA POST

[rhey-007]

Goretober Day. 5 - Decomposed

Sam Winchester x reader

Warnings/Tags: decomposed animal body, bones, mention of decomposing of human body, bugs

Goretober request list

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“Beautiful, isn’t it? “

You asked flabbergasted by the decomposed creature lying in front of you. Slowly running a finger on it's revealed bones you took in it's beauty, your boyfriend hunched above you admiring something else.

Sam loved how fascinated you were about bones, especially animal ones. He could listen to you ramble about the process of decomposition for years without even a little break.

The man even brought you some of the proudest parts of your collection, when he came back from hunts with his brother.

Speaking of Dean, the older Winchester was not pleased with your hyper fixation. He thought of it as disgusting, unhuman like. He thought it made his little brother even weirder than he was.

Besides, you were a witch, which was a big ‘no’ for Dean. But Sam could not care less about his opinion on this matter. What he cared about was the huge smile you gave him, every time he brought you a gift from the hunt.

“Do you have the camera? “

You questioned quietly as if you didn’t want to disturb the dead animal in it's eternal sleep. Sam nodded giving you the device.

After taking a few photos of the decomposed crow, slightly overgrown by nature, you gently started to gather your treasure.

You trimmed the grass and moss around it's tail, leaving only the fragments on it's body to make it look as natural as possible, then after gently picking up the skeleton, you put it in a box Sam handed you.

“It's just as breathtaking as you”

The man finally responded to your previous question, looking into the box.

“Y'know... We're gonna look like that one day too... Isn't that amazing? “

You looked at Sam with eyes full of love, you could not wish for a better partner, he understood and loved you as no other.

“It is”

You whispered, your breath fanning over his smile as now your faces were mere inches away. A chill run down your spine when suddenly Sam lowered to the ground, eyes staying glued to yours. He placed the box on the ground before standing back up, cold hands immediately finding their way under your shirt and gently squeezing your hips.

“We're going to lay under the ground, bones and remainings of skin covered in dirt, little unknown plants, roots and different kind of bugs which will feed off our bodies-“

“Oh what a sight”

You moaned quietly, cutting him off as you just couldn't hold yourself anymore, crushing your lips against his.

Sam tasted so so sweet, you couldn’t pull away, that is until your breath has gone away.

You looked at each other with admiration and a glint of need in your eyes, lost in your little fantasy completely forgetting you weren’t alone in the forest.

“What the fuck have I just witnessed... “

Dean cursed standing a few meters away from you.

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[bigmouthlass]

@sam-is-my-safe-word

Okay, you asked for it-- my semi-organized heart-eyed rant about the glory that is Dean Winchester.

First of all, he is almost inhumanly gorgeous. Like, Michaelangelo would've wanted to sculpt him but might not have felt himself worthy of the job. Not just in a generally attractive sense, but . . . my celebrity lust objects include Ewan McGregor and Chris Evans. I have a type and Mr. Ackles fits it almost exactly.

Secondly, Dean and I have a few things in common. Raised in poverty by an overwhelmed and undersupported single parent, forever feeling overshadowed by our more intelligent and more accepted younger siblings, didn't fit in with our peers or really thrive in school despite being constantly told how intelligent we were and how we had so much potential. We're both oldest siblings, both Aquariuses (Aquarii? his birthday's the 24th and mine's the 28th), and both of us had adult worries when we should've been preoccupied with friends and grades. (In the interests of fairness-- my family wasn't nearly as badly off, my sister wasn't so young she needed babysat, and I didn't handle being the mature one nearly as well as Dean did.)

Thirdly, there's a lot about Ackles's performance that just rings true to me. Constantly assuring himself that his father's the greatest man ever despite knowing full fucking well he wasn't, having a complicated relationship with his own exploitation, even the way he's trained himself to live without hopes or dreams. The cognitive dissonance he uses just to keep himself from going crazy feels correct in a way that in Sam sometimes rings false.

There's a bit in Orson Scott Card's afterward to his novelization of The Abyss, in praise of Ed Harris's performance as Bud Brigman. "From the moment he steps on screen, Harris's Bud is alert and alive. Harris gave Bud gestures, mannerisms, turns of phrase. Harris opened up Bud's soul for me." That's what Ackles does for Dean, and it's frustrating that, because professional awards are allergic to fantasy fiction that's not Game Of Thrones, he never got the recognition he deserved.

And Castiel called it in his famous final scene-- Dean's mistakes are made from a place of genuine caring. Even when he lies, it's out of a sense of protectiveness most of the time. Dean doesn't beat himself up over the enemies he can't defeat; he kills himself over the people he can't save.

A quick side-note-- I think people read a lot of Dean's subtler mannerisms as repressed bi- or homosexuality. IMO, those habits aren't exclusive to people who grew up queer in a queer-hating environment (John being a child of the 50's and ex-military, it wouldn't shock me at all if he was the type of father who made it clear men in same sex relationships was Not Fucking Acceptable). What they are characteristic of is someone who lives in eternal doubt of their right to just exist, and that's Dean all the way to the fingernails. Ever since he was four, the question, "Why Mom and not me?" would be quivering in the back of his mind. The incident with the Shtriga when John blames Dean for his own failure as a parent (which by the way if Dean had fired that shotgun he would've hit Sam, fuck you John Winchester you should never have left them alone in the first fucking place) and how Dean never accepts any kind of rebuttal on the subject of guilt-- Dean's defined by survivor's guilt and an eternal sense of failure, and his Hunting life can be read as an open courtship of death because he sees himself as an uncorrected mistake.

I could go on but those are the high points. Course a lot of those same points could be made about Sam. The ridiculously awesome thing about Supernatural is both the leads -- and this can be applied to most of the supporting characters, just about everybody is perfectly cast -- embody their characters so perfectly, everybody can catch something to care passionately about.