#but i think this also applies to just strangers being strangers on the internet

[thedarknesseater]

This is certainly v weird, but I'm realising that I don't really like random strangers on the internet (not my beloved moots) using she/her for me. It's they/them to you.

[ohnoitstbskyen]

I deleted the ask, but someone wrote one basically saying "why do you post reaction videos to Helluva Boss? Don't you know the show exploits its workers and they're overworked and get burned out?"

And, I mean, I love your energy, person who asked, definitely hold on to those values and speak up about this. But also, I am afraid I might have some bad news for you about literally the whole entire animation industry.

As near as I can make out from the sparse journalistic reporting that's been done on SpindleHorse -- and as a sidebar, please for the love of god read actual reporting about these things and not just callout posts and fandom discourse -- as near as I can make out, SpindleHorse as a studio is neither all that much better nor all that much worse than basically anywhere else in the industry on their level. It seems like it is (or was? Hazbin Hotel seems to be run differently) a studio mostly run by contracting people on a project-by-project basis, which leads to a crapton of turnover, and a huge need for organizing and onboarding, which according to the reporting I have read, the producers and freelancers have struggled to balance and manage properly, which has negatively impacted a number of the workers.

Top that with the usual catty, clique-based backbiting, sniping and poorly managed conflict resolution that's just kinda endemic in creative environments mostly staffed by twentysomethings and stressed out freelancers, and you have the recipe for a workplace where a lot of people are going to have a great time and feel creatively fulfilled, and a lot of people are going to come away feeling justifiably burnt the fuck out and exploited.

All of this is... not especially unusual for the animation industry, or indeed for any creative industry. Which is not to say that it is good, or that it should be allowed to be normal, or that it shouldn't be reported on and criticized (and please for the love of god support unionization efforts because that's the only thing that will actually address these kinds of systemic problems). It's just to say that if those kinds of issues are the line in the sand you draw where you refuse to engage with a studio's output...

Then, for starters, say goodbye to basically all of anime, because the Japanese animation industry is actively in a state of crisis trying to recruit new talent because its working conditions and pay are so astonishingly abysmal. And the horror stories that escape from that industry make the issues at SpindleHorse look like summer camp at times.

But you also have to say goodbye to a lot of American and European animation. Please do not imagine that Disney and its subcontractors, or that Nickelodeon or Warner Bros, are benevolent employers. They exploit their staff brutally and are currently trying to crush the labor value of animation with threats of generative AI being used to replace jobs. But those corporations also have extremely well-funded PR departments and the ability to silence employees with NDAs and threats of blackballing, so you don't get to hear as many of the horror stories as you might from a smaller independent studio that's less able to silence criticism by holding people's careers hostage.

All of this is to say that 1) it's valid and important to have criticism of both large and small-scale animation studios, and to keep the well-being and happiness of the workers higher in your priorities than the output of Products™.

And 2) if you're going to have a principle for what kinds of problems make a studio's output morally untouchable for you, and what kinds of problems you think should make a studio's output untouchable to other people, you do need to apply that principle consistently to the entire industry, and not just to the independent animation studio that happens to be surrounded by the internet's most inflammatory fandom discourse.

If you don't apply that principle consistently, maybe don't send reproachful messages to strangers scolding them for not living up to your standards, and even if you do apply that principle consistently, maybe still don't do that, because it's mostly quite annoying, and doesn't really do anything to support animation workers struggling for better working conditions.

The Animation Guild in the US is currently in the middle of a bargaining process with their industry, and they have a social media press kit as well as relevant talking points on their website which you can use to post in solidarity with the workers. If it comes to a full industry strike, consider donating to their strike funds to help them maintain pressure. Outside of the US, try and find out what (if any) local unions exist for animation workers, and maybe sign up to their mailing lists. They will let you know what kind of support they need from you.

[venomvalley]

LIGHTS, CAMERA—

onlyfans!leon kennedy x pornstar!reader // 5.6k words

summary: Leon needs a way to pay off his tuition for the police academy and you, his long-time friend slash rising pornstar, help him start his OnlyFans career. But things get a little awkward when your fans start begging you to collab.

tags: 18+ only! oral sex (m!recieving), safe sex, enthusiastic consent, p in v, praise kink, light corruption kink, reader films a non-leon threesome for plot reasons. continuing my submissive leon propaganda. there are also feelings here.

notes: jesus christ i finally finished this behemoth. based this around my own experience with sex work so it should not encompass the industry as a whole. this is just fiction.

-> read on ao3

The bedroom is bathed in dapples of red and blue when you open the door. Leon stands on a new shag rug just before the couch, arms spread wide when he turns and notices your presence.

“So, how's it look?”

You close the door behind you as you survey the room, eyes darting over decorations old and new.

His bed sits in one corner, sheets recently used, a set of sleep clothes tossed carelessly at the foot. Half-shoved beneath an askew pillow is the stuffed koala you bought him for his birthday last year. Band posters taped to the wall overhead.

Good thing he wasn't asking your opinion on that.

The remodeled filming area in another corner looks the most inviting. His soft, fluffy couch and pillows that quickly became a staple in his videos; two lamps on either side, lights perfectly aimed at the center cushion where he always sits (mood lighting is important, you had told him. an easy way to increase production quality); a small end table to store lube, condoms, toys for the day's shoot—anything you might need for filming amateur porn.

Your smile gleams with pride as you set your bag down near the door. “You've gotten really good at decorating. The fans are gonna love it.”

“You think so?”

You scoff at him in dramatic jest, shirking your coat somewhere near his bed. “Are you questioning my judgement?”

“Never. Couldn't have done it without you, honestly.”

Something sweet and sticky settles at the center of your lungs, and his cheery tone wrings out your breath. You couldn't imagine being anywhere else.

This all began as a way to pay off tuition from his current stint at some expensive police academy. If you're being honest with yourself, you much prefer him doing this. Maybe a bit selfish of you, given the circumstances, but he's good. And here's the thing: Leon paid off his debt months ago. He obviously loves the attention, the praise, the sharp spikes of dopamine each time he gets behind the camera (you get it—why else would you still continue fucking for some strangers on the internet?). He held the perfect recipe for stardom: an early twenties guy in prime shape, inexperienced to the point of blushing around any naked body beside his own, with the prettiest noises of pleasure you've ever heard. Everything fit into place.

Your presence in his life predates the porn. Just two almost-friends from high school who reconnected at a grocery store back home. A star in your own right, with a career spawning from NSFW subreddits you used to post on for fun. And when he came to you with news of his financial issues, desperate and embarrassed and all grown up, you didn't tell him about your job. You knew the risks, the side effects, the potential consequences. The internet—people—can be cruel.

Then he found your twitter (a happenstance, he swears) and the videos you posted. The website you linked in the description of all of them.

I think it's cool, he had said over text one night. At least it looks fun.

And so the floodgates opened.

You ensured the quality of his videos. Took some inspiration from a few guys you worked with in the past—lighting, angles, making noise is a must—and applied your own knowledge to craft Leon into the perfect sellable package. It's all business at the end of the day.

Until it isn't. Porn is one of very few industries that require the mix of business and pleasure for success. And although you play your directorial part well, you'd be a dirty fucking liar if you said that watching Leon jerk off every Tuesday and Friday isn't the highlight of your week.

He's a good boy so he leaves his face out of the shot, whines please and thank you to some invisible voyeur when he cums. Makes you food after a long session because you refuse to take any form of payment, but that first time he looked at you like a kicked dog when he insisted he pay you in a nice meal at least, and how could you resist?

So here you stand, the light casting soft shadows over his body as he plops down on the couch, boxers tight around his hips and thighs, bulge front and center when he spreads his legs wide.

Don't look don't look don't look. You might be a whore, but you can express self-control around your friend.

“What are we doing today?” you ask, turning around to sift through your bag on the floor.

“I got a few gifts in the mail, so…”

"Damn, already?”

He offers up a smug shrug, arms resting on the back of the couch. “What can I say? My fans love me.”

You set up the tripod and the camera (the same one you use for your own videos), as he sifts through the end table with a set of muffled thumps. He then places a bottle of lube and an unfamiliar cock ring on the coffee table, leaves to the bathroom for a moment before returning with the most sophisticated fleshlight you've ever seen. The material is see through, textured to perfection inside the sleeve. It's a work of masturbatory art.

“Holy shit.”

“Cool, right? It even has suction settings.” He slides a finger into the toy, and you watch through a filter of opaque glass as the silicone stretches beneath his exploration. “It's really soft.”

You swallow thick, eyes glued to the movement of his long fingers. “Oh, I gotta see this.”

His boyish excitement rubs off on you. Can't help it when he settles on the couch with a grin, fingers drumming along his thigh as you make last-minute adjustments to the lighting and camera's framing. The final result is beautiful, movie-like. Smooth gradient and hard shadows, showcasing his figure from neck to knee (an upward angle, of course—the most popular, a perfect showcase of the thickness of his thighs, a POV of sorts that places the watcher on their knees before him).

He slips into a role that mirrors much of his real life: curious and inexperienced, an endearing amount of confused. Changes his voice enough that, should anybody familiar stumble upon his videos, they wouldn't immediately recognize him. Makes a show of palming himself through his underwear, hips grinding a slow rhythm against his hand. He asks hushed questions, teasing and bashful as his cock swells beneath the fabric.

It's the ‘you really wanna see it?��� that does you in. Because yes, no matter how many times he's bared himself before the camera, you always wanna see it through the **technical filter **of the viewfinder. Can't bare to sneak a peek with the naked eye. Too afraid that he'll catch you staring.

And when he finally tugs down his underwear, waistband tucked snug beneath the weight of his balls, you curse the natural mechanism of blinking.

The show begins.

He takes time spreading the lube over his length, favors slow, teasing pumps as he tells you (no, not you specifically—the viewer) how good it feels. How he wishes his hand were yours. And it’s so easy to pretend that the camera isn’t there. That this isn’t a performance for hundreds of people. That he’s talking to you, the unseen face behind the lens, the catalyst of this whole affair.

He gets nasty as time goes on. Whines about how needy he is, how good it would feel for somebody to come and sit on it. The squelch of his fist is almost overstimulating. His palm rubs over his belly, follows the path of his happy trail to cup at his balls. It’s the perfect shot, really. The flex of his forearm, the show of veins along the back of his hand, the clench of his abdominals.

For the first time since you began filming his videos, temptation proves too strong to bear. For the very first time, you chance a look over the viewfinder. A simple rise of your head, a hairsbreadth of movement, but he notices. Locks lidded eyes with you and pins you there, the usual blue of his irises now deep as midnight, bottom lip pillowed between his teeth.

Your heart drops, settles somewhere snug between your hips where your pulse thumps heavy. If he said the word, you would crawl over on hands and knees and kneel between his legs and continue where he left off. There’s a pretty curve to his cock that you’d love to follow with your tongue. You wonder how the slick mess of his precum might taste.

Okay. So you’re a whore.

From what you’ve heard from friends in the business, porn isn’t supposed to be sexy for the cameraman. They’re too focused on camera angles and making sure the lighting stays good to worry about the actual sex. But it’s not like that with Leon. He and his pleasure sit front and center at all times. The scene is stagnant, with very few instances of framing or lighting changes. It’s just you and the man in the viewfinder.

You almost black out when he fits the fleshlight over his cock. The first pump leaves his thigh muscles tensing as his head falls against the back of the couch (heat settles in your belly when you realize that you’re the only one allowed to see his face and, by extension, his face when he's jerking off). His hips grind, chasing the suctioning pleasure as his fist builds a steady rhythm. He’s noisy: whining and moaning, cussing under his breath.

It’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and it ends much too soon. After a few minutes of milking vibration, he replaces the fleshlight with his hand, fucking his fist, body tensing as his orgasm looms.

He cums hard and heavy over his belly in pearlescent streaks that wet the line of dusky blond hair you find there. A horrible part of you wishes to lick it up. To clean his cock with your mouth instead of the wash cloth that you promptly run and fetch.

You trap yourself in the bathroom to calm the stampede of your pulse between your thighs. The weight of your need bends you over the sink, and you stick your hands beneath the warm water, gripped tight around the fabric, as you watch your sanity empty down the drain.

You come back with a smile, tossing the rag on his belly. “Good?”

He cracks open an eye, cheeks rosy post-orgasm, body melted into the couch. “You have no idea.”

As he starts to clean up, the red blip of your camera catches your attention. In your haste to escape, you forgot to end the recording. A definite first for you at this point in your career, and you should be way more humiliated than you feel about letting the camera run for five minutes, but you're currently soaking through your shorts and are far too worried about the wet spot you might leave on his furniture.

On cue, Leon turns to you, tying the strings of his jogging pants, and says, “What do you want for dinner?”

.

.

.

The message you receive from a long-time twitter follower on a boring Wednesday night licks heat up the back of your neck:

would love to see u collab with that new guy everybody's raving about. i'll tip extra…. dont make me beg ;)

ps ur so sexy. love that last DP video… blue is ur color

Then a link to Leon's twitter.

You're used to requests and the generous money that accompanies them. From the vanilla to the weird to the dehumanizing, you've admittedly filled each category. Film yourself smoking an entire cigarette? Two hundred bucks, easy. Sticking your feet in a store-bought lemon meringue pie? Five hundred, just like that.

You don't like to think about the last category too often. Luckily, you're well-off enough financially that you don't have to accept those requests anymore.

But this one frays your nerves solely for the fact that you consider it. You exit out of the browser and close your laptop and sit in the dark silence of your bedroom for a long few minutes.

It's not like you haven't thought about it. He's beautiful and sweet and genuine. The sex would undoubtedly be fun.

You imagine yourself teaching him a few things. The blush across his cheeks the first time you swallow down his cock, the high-pitched sigh he would make at the first feel of you around him, buried to the hilt, all clenching muscles and white-hot heat.

But you can't. Could never ask that of him. How much are you willing to ruin for a few hundred bucks?

You spend the better part of the next hour with your hand between your legs. Fantasizing. Nothing wrong with that. Just need a little release to make yourself feel better.

When you finally cum, it’s to the thought of bouncing in Leon’s lap. His hair fisted between your fingers. The thrum of his pulse beneath your lips.

The cleanup is embarrassing. Fantasy is one thing, but the proof of your betrayal spreads sticky between your thighs, on your fingers and lips. It’s the first time you’ve ever done something like this—come to the thought of a fellow sex worker.

But damn, you’ve never been this wet in your life. Never came this hard either.

Suffice to say, you’re considering your twitter follower’s request.

.

.

.

Moments like these are why you love your job.

Your friend’s face smothered by your thighs, a pretty cock deep down your throat. His name is Nate, tall and burly and hairy where it counts, and he knows how to fuck. He does it well.

The scene had been set in the bedroom of a mutual friend’s apartment. Fluffy pillows and soft sheets and ambient lighting. Bee sits in a chair just out of view of the camera, prepping herself with two fingers in her pussy and another circling her clit. She’s a sight to behold: thick at the hips and thighs and waist, soft to the touch, curly hair tied away from her face in an intricate updo.

You have two gorgeous people in the room with you, and yet all you can fantasize about is Leon. How he would fill your mouth, the softness of his tongue on your clit. If he’d be gentle or rough.

(You want him to use you like his fleshlight.)

You pull away from Nate’s cock with a gasp as he sucks hard on your clit, fitting a thick thumb inside your pussy to give you something to clench down on.

This is what you’re used to. This is fun.

And yet—

Bee climbs up on the bed, crawling over to your splayed bodies with a low-lidded grin. She joins you between his legs, kisses you hard on the mouth before licking a wet stripe up the length of his cock.

Threesomes are your favorite scene to shoot, no matter the mix of genders. A good change in routine, a pleasurable overstimulation. The diversity of bodies, of taste and smell and texture.

And yet—

The condom makes its arrival shortly after your first orgasm, and Bee helps you into place, taking her seat on Nate’s slicked-up face. With weakened legs, you seat yourself on his lap in one long stroke, balancing yourself with a hand on each of his thighs. He fills you full, more thick than lengthy, fitting perfectly against your g-spot with each grind of your hips.

And yet—

all you can think about is Leon.

The space he commands inside your head infuriates you. When the fucking is over and you’re all washed up and lounging on the couch, your friends take note of your distraction.

“Nobody else is gonna notice, but we do,” Bee says, nursing a glass of blood-red wine, cuddled up to your side like always.

She passes it to you with a knowing look, and you take a hefty swig before handing it back. “It’s just this guy. I’ve been helping with his content.” You shake your head, massaging a hand over your cheek. “It’s stupid, and it’s pissing me off.”

A bit of an understatement. You can’t tell them that he occupies every aspect of your waking mind. That every moment of free thought goes to fantasizing about fucking him.

Beside you, Nate dips his head, brows raised in surprise. “Oh shit. You in love, kitty cat?”

“Jesus Christ, no. He’s just—“ you sigh, “different. Cute, like a puppy or something.”

Bee nods. “Yeah, I get it. You’re in loooove.”

Your frustration reaches its peak, and you would pull your hair out from the root if not for the way she grabs your hands in a dramatic show.

“I’m not in love. I wanna fuck him.”

Your friends share an understanding ahhhh, and Nate wraps a comforting arm around your shoulders. Pulls you in close to say, “Listen, he’s forbidden fruit. We’ve all been there.”

The lilt of his tone portrays jest, and the heat in your cheeks makes you want to shrivel up and crawl into the crack between the cushions.

Bee laughs, and your shoulders curl toward your knees in resignation. “I can’t believe I have sex with you two.”

“Shut up. We’re the best you’ve ever had.”

You blink a moment, considering the statement.

Yeah. Can’t argue with that.

She pats your bare leg, pity woven in the lilt of her brow. “Just talk to him.”

“Absolutely not. We’re actually friends, and I don’t wanna mess it up.”

.

.

.

Leon texts you a few days later, well past midnight. A screenshot of a very similar DM to the one you received, quickly followed up by a set of question marks.

leon [2:45 am]

have u been getting these too

You snap out of your half-asleep state and roll over onto an elbow.

me [2:45 am]

yeah. when you get popular enough people request for you to collab with other creators.

leon [2:46 am]

wait they requested u to collab with me????

You adjust your grip on your phone, palms turning clammy at the question. The unknown of how this conversation may go strikes the fear of rejection in you. He’ll either voice his disgust or his excitement, and you—

Who are you kidding? You know exactly which response would be worse.

me [2:48 am]

they’re pretty much begging me actually

leon [2:49 am]

hmmm

The next evening, you show up at Leon’s apartment with your trusty duffel bag in tow. He sits on his couch, dressed down in a baggy shirt and sweatpants. A huge shift to what you’re used to. No sex toys or lube or neon lights to be found. Just Leon and whatever odd reality show he watches on the television.

“Hey,” you say, abandoning your bag and shoes and coat by the door.

You collapse on the couch beside him, a ball of anxiety wound tight in your chest. Not sure why. Things just feel different, off with him today. Like the living room holds its breath in anticipation.

He gives a simple greeting in return then focuses back on the tv, and you dissect the line of his shoulders, his expression, the relaxation of his muscles to give any sort of hint as to what the problem is. If there's even any problem at all.

Leon is one of your closest friends, and you don't want to lose him to some intrusive DMs on twitter. Or to the volatile nature of the porn sphere (you know firsthand how it chews people up and spits them back out).

“I kinda just want to… talk this time.” His voice comes out of nowhere, a loud break from the drone of the tv.

You turn to face him, throwing a leg over his knee. “We can do that.”

Subconsciously, he reaches for your thigh, palm warm through your jeans as he soothes a thumb along its seam.

He clears his throat. Says, “So. Saw your new video.”

Ah. The threesome. Wonderful reception from the viewers (you checked the comments). A lot of orgasms to be had. The first time Bee had ever squirted. Sex with them is always a treat. Comfortable and messy.

“What’d you think?”

“It looked… uh, fun.”

“It was a lot of fun.”

“I…” His brow furrows, head turning to stare at the wall behind you. “I wanna do something like that.”

Your heartbeat picks up in your chest, a thumping that vibrates your throat. “I have some people I can set you up with—”

“No, not like that.” He heaves a sigh, turning to look at you. Frustration clouds his expression, mouth twisting into a pout. “I'm not… experienced like you are.”

You remember him speaking about his ex—his first kiss, his first love, his first everything. A passionate relationship that he thought would last forever, now just a blip in the timeframe of his life.

The sex, however, left a lot to be desired. Expected given their inexperience, but you think it time for Leon to graduate, and given the current state of your conversation, so does he.

“You’ll be happy to know that a lot of people get off to that.”

“I know, but I want somebody I can trust.”

There's a heaviness to his words, a hidden meaning that he nudges you toward.

You think you might faint.

“Like who?”

You need to hear him say it. Couldn't bear the humiliation of being wrong.

He glances away, gaze bouncing over the coffee table. “You can say no, but I'd like it to be you.”

Inside your mouth, your teeth grit to force down a wide, beaming smile. It festers in your chest like a bonfire, the smoke almost suffocating.

“I'd be honored, Leon.”

He looks you in the eye for the first time since you walked through the door, and you swear you see the sun rise. His grip on your thigh tightens. “Seriously?”

You nod. “We gotta do this right, though. I work for a company that has actors fill out forms before every scene.”

“Forms?”

“Consent forms, the kinks you're into, that kinda thing.”

“Oh.”

“It's a formality, but it keeps everybody safe.”

“Okay, yeah. Let's do it.”

It happens on a Saturday. He comes over to your place this time—wants to see where you film your own videos, where you eat dinner in the evenings, where you lay your head down at night. You think a huge part of it is that nobody but you has ever been inside your office. All the videos you film in this room are solos.

Except for this one.

He prefers a submissive role. Light choking. Praise. Pet names.

You've psychoanalyzed him more times than should be healthy to see what makes him tick and now, sat on your lush, comfy bed, you hold the passkey to his psyche. The knowledge is exhilarating, many of your theories proven correct by the heavy ‘X’ of his pencil markings.

Bondage: yes.

Anal (giving/recieving): maybes for both.

You look up at him with a sharp grin, lips spreading wider at the sight of his fidgeting.

“Can I ask why anal is a maybe?”

He shrugs. “I’ve never done it before. Eventually I’d like to, but…”

“But not now?” He shakes his head. “That’s fine. Just checking.”

Specificity is important to you. Asking as many questions as possible to understand where the comfort and discomfort lay, so you know exactly where he defines his boundaries.

Once you’ve checked and double-checked his answers, the scene begins. Soft lighting to blur the edges, to aid in the dream-like nature you try to portray. Setting up the camera is second nature to you, a simple shot without an extra hand wielding it. You choose to go for a more amateur, intimate angle for his first video to make up for the lack of immersion.

Two creators meet up for a shoot, and if they seem like they know each other personally, you can thank chemistry and hormones.

A good cover for any future skeptics.

The video begins with Leon sat on the end of the bed, your form kneeling between his legs. You had promised him that you would hide his face, and the framing reflects that—you in full view, Leon from the neck down.

Your hands massage at the muscles of his thighs, the length of his cock a heavy weight against his belly. He’s bigger up close, the sight of his slicked-up head making your mouth water. Thick enough to provide a stretch. Perfect.

This is it. What you’ve been dreaming about for weeks.

You catch his eye then lean forward to press a chaste kiss to his frenulum, and beneath your hands, his muscles tense then release. The blue of his eyes darkens beneath the furrow of his brow.

So pretty. Always pretty, yes, but even prettier with his dick in your mouth. He tastes masculine, like salt-musk and body wash. Weighs down your tongue like you imagined in your fantasies. You drool over his length and swallow him down in one smooth motion, your throat sheathing around the flared head of his cock.

His head falls back, hips twitching against your mouth, a whine building in his chest. You begin to bob your head, slow enough for him to reach for you—fingers brushing your shoulder, a palm soothing down your back, touch feather-light. Reverent.

And then he pushes you away. Says, “I don’t wanna finish like this.”

When you smile up at him, his thumb plucks the swollen curve of your bottom lip, lidded eyes meeting your softened gaze. Like a sledgehammer to the chest, affection slams into you. The suddenness is enough to take your breath away.

He helps you to your feet, steadies your hips as you straddle him, and then he kisses you. Sweet as sugar. Slow pecks of his lips against yours, the quiet noise of your mouths, the weight of his warm hand massaging over the small of your back.

For the first time in a while, you forget about the camera. You forget about posing and angles and looking your best. The world narrows in on Leon—the tenderness in which he holds you, the softness of his skin, the pretty cock pressed against your belly.

You pull away and lay a hand to his chest. “Lay down, honey.”

He obeys your instruction in silence. Spreads out on the bed as you roll the condom on and soak his length in lube. Your hands shake as you carry out the motions (second nature), excitement heating your blood.

How many times have you dreamt about this?

You part your labia with the plush head, slicking up your clit, back and forth and back and forth until he shudders. Grips hard at your waist. Pleads with you under his breath.

“You want it, baby?” you whisper, voice a messy shudder as your pleasure begins to climb, syrupy and slow. Thawing molasses.

He nods his head, swallows thick when you line yourself up.

It's always the first thrust—thick, stretching heat—that gets you. The way you both gasp at the fresh sensation, and you find it difficult to keep up your porn star persona when his eyes glisten like your pussy hangs the stars in the sky.

You settle in his lap for a long moment, whispering praise as your body stretches to accommodate him.

You're so pretty.

How do you feel so good?

It's like we were made for each other.

He grinds up into you, already bottomed out but chasing more of that plush heat, brows arching when you follow his rhythm with your own hips.

As if remembering the actual reason behind the sex, you arch your back for the camera, slowing the rise and fall of your hips to better present the way your hole stretches around Leon's cock. You even give a fucked-out smile to the lens, head turned to gaze over your shoulder, bottom lip tugged between your teeth.

You hook your feet over his spread thighs for leverage, hands steady atop his broad chest, and begin to bounce in earnest. The harsh slap of skin, the wet squelch of your coupling leaves you clenching hard around him. He whines beneath you, effectively pinned in place, his grip on your hips shifting to your ass.

You circle trembling fingers over your clit, gasping at the pleasure that coils heat in your belly. He fills you to perfection, brushes every nerve inside your pussy as you ride him, and you can't stop looking at him. His face, in particular, more expressive than you've ever seen it. Wide eyes wet with tears, brows drawn, pretty lips open in a silent moan.

He grabs you at the waist, hard enough to bruise in an effort to still you. To pull your chest to his. Traps you there with an arm wrapped around your back.

“Are you—”

He huffs. “I need a second.”

You grin against the side of his neck, nipping at the cute mole just beneath his jawline. “It's okay if you cum.”

“No. Not—not yet.”

During the downtime your mind drifts back to the camera, long enough to question how the shot looks, how long this will take to edit, if people will even like it. It's different than anything you've done thus far. Fitting, you suppose, considering Leon is different than everybody else you've slept with. Something you can't take the time to unpack right now, but you like being with him. The sex feels like your heart might collapse under its own weight.

He kisses you and you melt into him, fingers mapping out the bulk of his arms, the heave of his chest, the stubble along his jawline. You tilt your hips to relieve the pressure building in your belly, grinding your clit against his pubic bone when he parts your lips with his tongue.

The motion sparks an all-consuming blaze, your bodies a forest fire. He rolls you over, face buried in your neck, then seats himself between your spread thighs. Smooths his cock over your pussy, the fat head catching on your clit.

“Fuck, baby,” you sigh, and stretch your arms over your head in offering, thoughts turning to static at the abrupt shift in dynamic. “That's so so good.”

He bottoms out in one stroke, arms flexing at the velvety clench of your cunt. Exhales a steadying breath before finding his rhythm: a steady, rough slap of his hips that jolts you against the sheets. His name rests a searing, heavy weight on your tongue, but you can't risk crying out to him. One issue during editing and you've suddenly doxxed him.

But oh, the temptation rears its head, a silky suggestion at the back of your brain.

You grab him by the nape of his neck and tug him down, until you can whisper into his ear. Breathe his name like a prayer, over and over again, quiet enough for only him to hear.

His thrusts intensify, and your fingers slide between your bodies to rub over your clit. You clench hard around him, a burst of heat singeing the base of your spine, and he groans into your neck with a stutter of his hips.

You cling to him as the pleasure rises, teeth sinking into the meat of his shoulder.

And then you’re cumming. It comes on fast, slams into you with a force that steals your breath, and Leon crushes you against his chest as he weathers the rhythmic fluttering of your cunt. Grinds his hips into yours as you milk him.

When the last of the aftershocks finish, you barely manage a breath before he kisses you again. Devoid of heat, a slowness both languid and loving.

He pulls away long enough to whisper, “Thank you,” against your lips.

You smile.

.

.

.

Your video with Leon is a resounding success, garnering you new followers and subscribers after posting the teaser on twitter. People compliment your chemistry, how comfortable you seemed around one another. Some speculate that you’re dating. Others beg for you to work with him again.

Leon comes over the night after you post the video to read the comments, and you spend the next few hours combing through the best ones.

hybridscreamer07: i could see ur pussy clenching when u came... so hot kitty xoxo

sabrina_daniels73: MORE OF THIS PLS!!! i love seeing couples make porn together :)))

titsandass.fan replying to sabrina*_daniels73**: are u new??? theyre not a couple dumb fuvk*

aquaticcrage: mmmmm idk which person i'd rather be

And then you have a talk, curled up in your comfy bed, some youtube video droning in the background. He had brought over some wine coolers to celebrate, and you're both halfway through the second one before he sets it on the nightstand and turns to you.

“I was wondering something.” His timidness makes a return, cheeks blooming into a deep blush.

“I’m listening.”

“So… was that a one-time thing?”

You curl up against him, resting your cheek on his shoulder. “Did you want it to be?”

Anxiety pierces your chest, strips your soul raw. You liked the sex. A lot. Fantasized so much about it that you feared he could never compare, but being with him was better than any thought conjured by your brain. But most importantly, you like him. Like spending time with him, and seeing him naked, and his smile, and his cooking. Such mundane things, yet you can’t imagine living without them.

He swallows thick. Says, “No.”

You can breathe again.

“Good. I don’t either.”

He blinks down at you, lips parting in surprise. And then, as if the words finally register, his face softens. “How soon is too soon?”

“We can start right now.” You move to straddle his hips, slipping your fingers beneath his shirt.

“You don’t have your camera.”

You press a kiss to the purpled bruise on his shoulder, blotted in the shape of your teeth. “We don’t need one.”

[pro-sipper]

I understand that we should just block content we don't wanna see, but I still think things like proships or ships that are wrong and illegal in irl should be kept private. Because that is exposing kids to the romantization of abuse, incest, and pedophilia. This content may expose them to predators, which could cause them harmful trauma, the type that people claim to use proshipping for. They may think that a person older than them liking a kid is ok, even though the adult has bad intentions. We know that they are fictional characters, but they represent real people and can still affect kids. And if this isn't supposed to affect them irl, why do so many groomers show proship media and illegal art to grow kids?

Don't want to start anything just curious

I think the short version of the argument is basically "the internet shouldn't have to be a 100% sanitized and safe space for children". But getting further into it...

"but I still think things like proships or ships that are wrong and illegal in irl should be kept private."

It's not worth mentioning now but "proships" aren't a thing. Proship doesn't stand for problematic ship, it's not an adjective.

My question is why this line of thinking only applies to ships? Murder and cannibalism are also illegal, but no one's going around saying you should keep your love of horror to yourself, or only watch R rated movies in the privacy of your own home.

"Because that is exposing kids to the romantization of abuse, incest, and pedophilia."

The majority of people interacting with media like this, or making posts about this, DO NOT want kids interacting with their content! They slap every rating, warning label, and trigger tag under the sun onto their work to say that it is not for kids. At the end of the day, that's all you can do. It is not one random proshipper's job to shelter every single child in the world.

Furthermore, kids are exposed to that crap from plenty of other places besides randos on tumblr. Walking into a library or turning on a television can easily expose kids to these topics just as much as going onto ao3 or opening tumblr could. That doesn't mean every professional author or tv writer on earth needs to create art that's palatable for children. Because that's not their responsibility.

"This content may expose them to predators"

It's grim to say, but literally anything on earth could potentially expose a child to a predator. Getting on the bus, going to the park, going to school, going to church, going to a friend's house, going home. Honestly I think it's a bit of a privileged mindset to think that a child would be 100% safe in this world if it weren't for faceless boogeymen online committing the sin of writing dark fic of their Blorbos.

"which could cause them harmful trauma,"

Again, that trauma could come from anywhere. And you're putting the weight of preventing that onto random strangers online, not anyone who's concretely in the hypothetical child's life, or actually responsible for them

"the type that people claim to use proshipping for"

Appreciate the subtleties of invalidating other people's trauma. Just because you don't have the same coping mechanisms doesn't mean theirs are invalid. Especially when countless licensed therapists agree that writing is one of the better ways you can help process trauma.

And to state the obvious, you don't need to have trauma to be a proshipper. Not everyone uses dark content for self reflection, some people just think it's neat.

"They may think that a person older than them liking a kid is ok, even though the adult has bad intentions."

A kid should not be getting 100%, or even most of their life lessons from fictional media. Parents, guardians, teachers, and other trusted adults in a child's life are the ones who need to teach them right from wrong, and how to protect themselves. I remember being a kid and being told by my mom "now if a stranger pulls up to you and says they lost their puppy and they'll give you candy if you help them look for it, do NOT go with them". That was her job as a parent.

Now I know that sadly, not every child has that kind of trusted adult in their life. But it's not the responsibility of a bunch of fanfic authors on tumblr to fill in the gaps.

"We know that they are fictional characters, but they represent real people and can still affect kids."

It doesn't matter how closely or loosely fiction depicts our reality, it's still just fiction at the end of the day. Movies have been using the whole "Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental" disclaimer for almost as long as there have been movies.

"And if this isn't supposed to affect them irl, why do so many groomers show proship media and illegal art to grow kids?"

One, art is not illegal. Unless you get caught graffiti-ing, then you might get fined. And no one is saying this kind of thing can't affect a child. But why, in this scenario, are you putting the blame on fanfic authors and fanartists before putting the blame on the actual groomer??

And again I ask, what exactly is "proship media" anyway? I'm guessing the kind of stuff that constantly appears on people's DNI lists, which could be anything from Steven Universe to Cannibal Holocaust, so who really knows??

Like I said in the short version, the internet should not have to be sanitized for the sake of the children. The entire internet does not need to be one giant safe space for kids. Adults have a right to talk about adult things with other adults. To explore dark topics in fiction, or to have fun with taboos in a harmless way.

I want the world to be safe for kids too. But the way to do that isn't to forbid adults from posting shit online. Instead of trying to shield children from every controversial, difficult, or uncomfortable topic under the sun, give them the tools they need to learn how to process these things.

Be a safe person to talk to if a kid has a question. Help them understand why something might be okay in a fantasy setting, but it's not something that should carry over into real life (like, a fairy tale prince kissing an sleeping princess to break a curse is fine, but in real life where there's no magic you should always make sure someone is okay with it before kissing them. Something like that)

Teach them internet safety, above all else. When I was a kid, you didn't give out any personal info. Nowadays kids have no qualms about giving out their full name, age, list of phobias and disorders, showing their school, their house - the list goes on.

Honestly, I think we need to go back to scaring kids with Stranger Danger, at least a little. But that's starting to veer into a different topic and I think I've said all I need to say about this one today.

[innocuousghost]

Since the article about Neil Gaiman I've seen a lot of people reassessing their relationship with Terry Pratchett. Which to a certain extent does make sense: they were co-authors and as a part of his cult of personality Neil Gaiman frequently presented himself as The Guy Who Knew Terry Pratchett. So in the public consciousness their legacies seem very intertwined.

So I can understand the pivot to asking about Terry Pratchett.

But a lot of what I've seen strikes me as being paranoid and conspiratorial in a way that I do not think is healthy or particularly useful. ("Did he know? Did he not know? Was Neil Gaiman overstating their friendship? Why did Terry Pratchett really have his hard drive destroyed?")

Now, I never met Terry Pratchett. But for my money? It seems pretty likely that he didn't know what was going on. The article itself states that most of Neil Gaiman's living friends didn't know what was going on: "But in my conversations with Gaiman’s old friends, collaborators, and peers, nearly all of them told me that they never imagined that Gaiman’s affairs could have been anything but enthusiastically consensual." And throughout most of the timeline of assaults the article covers Terry Pratchett was largely either in the late stages of dimentia on another continent or dead.

Though obviously we can't say for sure he didn't know something. (Even if he genuinely didn't know it's not like he would have turned to Rihanna Pratchett and said "Just in case anybody ever asks I want it on the record that to my knowledge Neil Gaiman is not and never has been a serial rapist.")

But ultimately. That's not actually the core issue that's keeping people awake at night I don't think. I think it's "How do I continue being fans of creatives knowing that some of them are secretly capable of legitimate evil without me ever being made aware of it?"

There is a pretty loud and unpleasant contingent on the internet whose solution to that problem seems to be "You can't. The only way to eschew blind celebrity worship is to live your life every second assuming in the back of your mind that every creative living or dead could be revealed to be a serial rapist at any moment. Just in case it turns out they actually are." Which. Doesn't strike me as particularly helpful. Or even feasible. And that is certainly not a lens I would recommend universally applying to strangers. Not even famous ones.

Instead I think it's probably helpful to look at famous strangers the way you would look at strangers in your own life - like the barista at your coffee shop: that they are probably flawed but also presumably decent. And much like with a barista, in your limited interactions (largely exchanges of product for money, with perhaps a smattering of surface level small talk. Much like with celebrities) you probably won't have much opportunity to discover if they're secretly a bad person. So if it turns out they are, it really isn't your fault that you didn't notice.

And based on what I saw in his books and interviews and his memoir by Rob Wilkins - though he was presumably decent I also certainly think Terry Pratchett was flawed. He was occasionally rude (based on anecdotes from people who knew him), some of the jokes in his books about the counterweight content strike me as being in poor taste and despite his flashes of acab I'd say the perspective of the city watch books was actually largely police reformist rather than abolitionist.

Yet I continue like his work (and what small slice I know about him as a person) anyways.

And understanding creatives as being flawed doesn't even mean "there's something unequivocally problematic out there! Hiding! In their work! In their interviews! And if you employ enough of a bad faith reading then you'll be able to find it!" No. (I mean, there might be some genuinely ethically dubious stuff in there but there also might not.) In my experience even just seeing the little flaws, like flaws in their craft are enough to knock creatives off of the perfect pedestal in your mind. Like, stuff you don't even have to be super knowledgeable about the craft in question to notice. "Eh that scene really dragged. That joke didn't really land. Anyways" And I certainly think Terry Pratchett had his craft issues. Just look at the first two Discworlds and some of the middle rincewind books for proof of that. And it can even be smaller than that. Tiny personality flaws that annoy you: Terry Pratchett was very snobby about Doctor Who in a way that strikes me as overly pedantic enough to be worthy of an eyeroll.

We should see the creatives who you admire, who make work you love as earthly and human. Not as untouchable gods who can do no wrong. (Clearly that isn't working out for us for a variety of reasons)

And setting aside the total monsters, I think it's a good thing that the stuff you like was made by people who are flawed. Humans are flawed, the people in your fandom are flawed, your friends are flawed, and you're flawed. But look at all the cool stuff you all make anyways.

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

perhaps a bit of an odd question: so, when I'm scrolling tumblr on mobile, I have a habit of downloading most images i come across, so that I can send them to people who don't use tumblr, especially memes and animal photos. however, i also have severe memory issues, and I may end up forgetting where i got certain images. i know for the photo repository one of the rules is to not repost the photos without any modification- which i might forget, or forget which images on my phone fall under that rule. and while i would guess that that rule doesn't apply to stuff like direct messages or texts, i might forget to tell the person I'm sending it to, who might repost it elsewhere without being aware, or months after downloading i will just forget and use one of the photos in a post I'm making because it felt relevant.

this is something i can pretty easily solve myself by just blocking the photo repository blog, or tags relating to it, but I'd rather not do that because i do really like seeing the photos and all the info and stuff. and i would assume it would be an insane amount of work for you to add something like a watermark to every single photo, so I'm not really sure how to go about this. i like seeing the photos, but i don't want to accidentally break the rules.

You clearly care deeply about doing the "right thing", so, what that tells me is that you're not actually the target audience for that rule. I appreciate all the thought you put into this message. Let's talk about it!

I've been reconsidering if requiring people to get permission for reposting images is the best policy to have and I'd like people to weigh in.

My original reasoning was this: the more I can ensure that reposts are affiliated with credit, the better I can control copyright on the images on the site, and therefore have more ground to challenge any scrapers/fake accounts/AR groups that yoink them for nefarious purposes. The easiest way to do that seemed to be to have people ping and ask, with the expectation of saying yes almost all the time.

But there's a couple problems with that, I think, in practice:

People don't like emailing strangers (I forget this! I have done it for work for so many years it isn't uncomfortable anymore).

This isn't how the internet works. (Tumblr has a specific microculture that encourages crediting creators and not stealing! Once this is shared more widely on other platforms, I don't expect it'll be the same ecosystem).

It actually undermines organic spread of content! (You're less likely to make an excited post about a cool photo if you have to send a maybe-scary email and wait for a response). And I do want there to be lots of eyeballs on the photos.

Realistically, @nexus-nebulae, with the policy right now? If you slipped up and reposted something without thinking, I'd just ask you to add credit to the post so it directs back to the site. The goal of this whole project is community access and engagement - I want to you to enjoy the photos, and send them to your friends! I'm just trying to also protect it from the awful that a lot of the internet has become.

But, I'm also wondering it it makes sense to swap the policy to say that it's fine to re-post images on socials as long as they're appropriately credited and/or linked back to the repository. This isn't the policy yet, but if you're reading this please tell me what you're thinking.

Non-edited image use (like putting them in a scientific paper, using them to build a curriculum unit, or putting them on board game cards - these are just random examples) would still need to be requested; but that's an entirely protective stance and if you ask, my goal is to always say yes.

So OP, please don't worry too much. Enjoy looking at the animals, do your best, and I'll be happy. :)

[drdemonprince]

hey there! in regards to ur last ask (about adults in kink spaces online having status quo ideas about kids in those spaces and such, sorry this isn’t a great summary), do you have any ideas on how to combat that? this is a genuine question - those disclaimers of ‘no minors can follow’ and such have always made me a little confused whilst i understood the statement behind them objectively you know? and now that i’m adult (legally - i turned eighteen a couple of months ago), i’m having trouble figuring out how to talk about kink and sex online in a way that doesn’t hurt kids or exclude them. like, i want to post some explicit stuff i’ve written on my blog or ao3, but i know that i have kids subscribed to me since i used to post relatively bland kids stuff for years before that. so like… how would one navigate kink spaces online and general spaces with an attitude of understanding that trying to close off these spaces to kids completely is harmful but that kids can also be harmed by people in these spaces? if that makes sense?

I think it is a really challenging thing to navigate. The way that I handle it personally is that I don't regard it as my responsibility to monitor and police the ages of people following me. I want the information that I put out into the world to be freely available to the people who need it most; one of the ways that I ensure that is by not paywalling any of my writing, and another is by not age restricting things except for when circumstances mean that I absolutely have to. for example: during some of our live streams that have been particularly focused on kink or sex, Maddie and I have flagged the stream as 18 plus out of necessity, and if a member of our chat identifies themselves as being under 18 during such streams, we have to ask them to leave. but in terms of my own private attitudes, I recall accessing porn and sexual writing from a very young age and learning a great deal from it, and I don't think there is anything wrong with a young person doing so. and if a young person has questions around sexual health and safety and they direct them to me, I would generally be comfortable answering those questions or at least directing them to resources. I do all I can to normalize talk about these things and de-exceptionalize sex, and I don't let myself get intimidated by puritanical accusations about that being inherently evil and improper. but I also have really firm digital boundaries in terms of not giving a stranger on the internet much access to my life or getting too overly involved in theirs. I do this because I'm a public figure and people can be very inappropriate with me, but another benefit of this approach is that I'm never really having any kind of conversation with an internet stranger that would immediately turn inappropriate if I would find out that they were a minor. strangers on the internet are strangers. I can pass along resources and share my opinion if they ask me for advice, but I am not developing a close relationship with them or developing anything involving emotional or sexual intimacy with them. or with any, like, fan either. obviously some of this is different from your own situation, but you can probably see the logic here and how you might apply it to your own ways of relating to the subject online. I think there is never any harm in making information available, being aware of what a platform's terms of service are just for the sake of protecting yourself, and maintaining good boundaries with people you do not know while still being friendly, helpful, and cordial.

[velvetvexations]

apologies for not having links but i blocked everyone on the whole thread and i don't care to willingly seek it out again but on the subject of dropout discourse – i saw someone say there needed to be a list of which dropout members were white vs poc in a similar vein to the tme vs tma trans people stats list and........ do.... do you not see how that's literally tokenizing real life people and their identities.... do you not see how sorting REAL people into groups to determine if a media company is diverse enough is.... not exactly the leftist praxis you think it is? maybe instead, idk, support & uplift comedians of color instead of argue about identity politics online? maybe do antiracist work in real life instead of just infighting? or even actually write to Dropout and articulate any worries you have with regards to diversity & inclusion?

(and if you want to make it worse someone on the thread said they weren't "sure if some people (specifically Zac Oyama) 'counted' as people of color" like?????? 1) if you admit to not being sure if someone counts as a poc then maybe you, a stranger on the internet, is not qualified to make a list about real people's identities which can be both fluid and personal 2) maybe such a list isn't actually as useful as you think it is 3) there was literally a College Humor sketch about parodying the idea of being Asian 'enough' featuring Zac *years* ago)

it also just feels like such a clear example of taking the latest queer discourse and trying to justify it by going "well WHAT IF we apply this to race??" when 1) it's usually white people drawing those comparisons (though idk if these people were white or not) and 2) as such is usually a gross misunderstanding of racism and 3) often makes the original point *much* worse.

his last name is Oyama what do these fucking people want

no, you know what? I hope they do it, please Dropout fandom, make the racism version of the tee em ay stats, I dare you

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

Genuine question, how does one deal with someone being so insistent on their lack of (self-)worth? Not to vent too much, but I grew up with someone who was at least as bad, if not worse than Ragatha. I developed similar habits (this comic is a painful reminder of that) and my friends also tend to struggle with these feelings. But I never know how to deal with these issues, and it just leaves me feeling helpless.

I believe you‘re not a psychologist and it‘s fine if you don‘t want to answer this. But if you do have some advice or resources on this topic, I‘d love to know about it.

hi !

you're right , i am Not a psychologist ! my only credential is pretty much having it as my special interest of many years , so ... ! obligatory ' take this with a grain of salt ' disclaimer

i'm only answering this ask because i do like talking about these kinds of stuff ( in fact i'm in the middle of writing another psychology infographic with ragatha because of Course i am , ) and it's Relevant right now ... but for the most part i am literally just a stranger on the internet and thus i'll only be giving out general advice !! any specifics of the situation are stuff you'll need to figure out yourself

number one thing is that you should Always Take Care Of Yourself . it may be hard to admit , but these types of people can actually be Emotionally Draining - and i'm saying that as someone who had to deal with those people myself . and well you don't want to accidentally say things that make them feel worse

second thing is that a lot of it is ... really the other person's effort . all you can do is be supportive and gently encourage them . what took me so long to accept is that no amount of words or compliments will lift someone's self-esteem up - while it helps , it really has to come from Within , and that's something that'll take months or Years to build up . you can't force someone to start loving themself - and that's a hard pill to swallow

and the third thing is that ... well . there's a possibility that it could be a symptom of a mental disorder and thus you should encourage them to seek professional help . i am aware that the option is not available for everyone though , but i think recognizing that it might be a mental problem might take the burden off of you a little - as they're not really things a non-professional should handle .

as for resources , this article was extensive about this topic , including recognizing where the low self-esteem comes from , what Not to say to someone with low self-esteem , and tips that'll help the person ! very wonderful to read .

this article is for partners but i think it applies to people you're close with in general . what i like about it is how it Encourages open communication and listening . something you'll realize is that it's Different for everybody and it's good to learn more about the problem than jumping to a hasty solution or making assumptions . also it encourages them to talk more about their Feelings and talking about your feelings is what Very Cool And Hot People Do !

oh God sorry for the long post this should be enough to give me a diagnosis -

[pinkkop]

Day 43 - 15 Days BL Challenge (part 3)

Day 43 - Let’s get delulu, which branded pairing should just get married already? (Note: this is all for fun and giggles, we’re not actually speculating on anyone’s sexuality or relationships.)

Edit: Fair warning, this post got away from me, so here's a tangent about BL pairs first. I won't get offended if you just skip to me talking about BillyBabe.

When it comes to BL pairings I'm very much someone who won't 100% believe that a BL pairing is actually dating as long as there's any financial gain from them pretending to be a couple. (Which is almost all the time for a pairing who's last show was together or that has an upcoming show together or anything vaguely like that)

So as long as there's even the smallest chance that actors are aware of the camera filming or taking pictures of them, then I view their interactions through the lens of fan-service.

This is not to invalidate the love that's between some of these pairings or say that any fan, who does think a pairing is dating, is lying, but since fan-service is a big part of BL, we're always going to have pairings acting it up and I think leaning into the idea that pairings are dating is a slippery slope.

When we decide we think a pairing is dating, we suddenly have a lot more stake in the pairing and it opens up for so many possibilities for people's feelings to get hurt and hurt people are more likely to lash out.

We've already seen it a good handful of times when it comes out that an actor in a pairing is dating someone else or that the actors in the pairing really aren't very close. When that happens fans feel deceived and hurt, get mad and lash out. "Fans" get nasty and start treating the actors and/or their real life partners horribly, because "how could they deceive us like this?"

This could really be applied to anything we believe to be true about an actor. Sexuality, personality, friendships etc. as long as it's something personal to the actor.

And if you're reading this and are thinking "I wouldn't do that!", then I'm sure you're right, I'd like to think this about myself as well, but some fans would and have done exactly that. And it's just hard to know exactly how you'll react until it does happen. Maybe we won't lash out at the actor but we might still turn our back on the actor and help fuel the fire of hurt and anger in the fandom, even if the actor really never did anything wrong, we just assumed.

Bottom line: I'll happily engage in fan-service but as long as a pairing's working together in some way then I'll never be 100% convinced the pairing's actually dating and I think keeping the actors and their personal lives at an arms length is good for both the fans and the actor in the long run.

Anyways, now lets talk about a specific BL pairing because I guess that's what the prompt was actually about...

Billy and Babe!

These two!

I know I already said that I view BL pairings through the lens of fan-service whenever they're in front of a camera but what the fuck are these two doing?! It's like they're doing fan-service on speed!

Making one after the other of really intimate vlogs where they put up a camera and show the fans exactly how close they are. Like some of the things they're sharing in the vlogs are honestly too intimate to share with strangers on the internet if you ask me. Like:

Straight up cuddling in bed in probably just their underwear(?) before getting out of bed in the morning 🤯

Being domestic AF in their hotel room just in robes and underwear (?) 🤯

Whatever it is Billy finds funny about Babe saying that he "Slept so well" 🤯

And finally them being the antitheses to 'two bros chilling in a hot tub, 5 feet away because they're not gay' here 🤯

Apparently their company has come out and said that they don't control any of the things that BillyBabe film in their vlogs and Babe has also recently said he isn't single. Like what the fuck, guys?!

I honestly really hope that this doesn't give any other BL pairings ideas because I don't want this to push the boundaries of what's normal for fan-service. Because this isn't something you just do with your bro and if they aren't actually dating and are instead just playing the part of dating, I think they're taking it too far.

Anyways, I'm mostly just curious to see how this evolve and what happens when they aren't working together anymore.

Maybe they're dating, maybe they're fuck buddies, maybe they're just the best of friends, or maybe they are none of those. Either way, it's none of my business! I just hope they're happy.

The original challenge is here, part two here and part three here.

[alrightbuckaroo]

Favorite Fandom Memories

Oh my gosh, where do I even begin?

I guess I can start with the fact that I can’t help but think we’re our own 126 in a way. A bunch of strangers that found each other and share a lot of love for something (they save lives, we ramble about it <3)

So yeah, I definitely can’t help but highlight all of the amazing people I’ve met in my meager, two-three years, I’ve been in this fandom. I definitely feel like I’ve gotten closer with people in a way I never thought I would, to the point that I’d go as far to say I feel like I’ve made some friends <3

I also just love seeing how this show has spoken to everyone. I know that it’s just a silly little cookie cutter procedural, but seeing not only the characters and actors grow, but all of you! Finding yourself in these characters, gaining confidence in your skill-set, finding friendships/relationships, it’s all been so lovely to see <3

It’s been so amazing, and I can’t help but feel it’s because this might just be the kindest corner on the internet. I’m not kidding, everyone I’ve come across on here is just the kindest, sweetest soul. I don’t tell you all that enough.

Speaking of which, my goodness what a creative, collaborative fandom!! From the writing, the art, the gif-making, the cross-stitching, all the different avenues everyone has loved this show, even with the meta posts! I love that we all celebrate this show in the way we know how <3

Also, I don’t have a license, so I promise I’m not fishing, but I’m so glad I’ve been able to share my writing with all of you because it’s reassured me in ways you don’t even know.

I’m trying to say this in a way that doesn’t sound braggadocios because ew, but I always tell my best friend that up it wasn’t until I found a place in this little corner of the internet that I started to feel confident in my writing.

I always thought I was a very middle of the road, and who knows, maybe I am, writer, but this is such an encouraging, reassuring fandom, it made me feel so much more pride in my work than before. Being able to bounce ideas off and collaborate with other such creative people has only helped me. I don't think I would have written the Time Loop AU without it!

Hell, ya’ll have given me the confidence to apply to grad school!!

Anyways, I can’t wait to see how we only continue to grow. I know I’m personally not planning to go anywhere. I’ve got way too many WIPs (complete Tarlos rewrite where Carlos' family owns a diner, anyone?) and I like you all far too much <3

So anywho, I'm late to this, as always, so here's an open tag for anyone wants to open up their hearts <3

Thanks so much for the tags,

@thisbuildinghasfeelings, @welcometololaland, @reyesstrand, @carlossreaders, @nisbanisba

@tellmegoodbye, @heartstringsduet, @carlos-in-glasses, @bonheur-cafe, @goldenskykaysani

@herefortarlos, @lemonlyman-dotcom and @theghostofashton <3 <3 <3 <3

[northern-passage]

is it weird/wrong of me to always play a lesbian character as a man? like no mater what if game i always try and be female, the man mc i just can fit into as a man myself. i dont think its anything to do with wanting to be a woman (but if i was reborn and able to chose how i looked and what gender i would be i would pick to be a woman) im just a bit confused becuse i have seen people say that im basiclly sexuallising lesbians and its very wrong of me to do that. im just lost becuse it dont want to sexualise that but i just feel more comfrotble being a woman in the game becuse it feels like im able to express myself more/be more emotinal, but if im a man ingame it jusr feels wrong of me to do any of that, like im not soppused to.

well... it doesn't really sound like you're sexualizing anyone. what you've described here doesn't really seem to have anything to do with sex in that way at all. it sounds like you just feel more comfortable playing as a woman and there's nothing wrong with that.

there are definitely some games that do write their male and female mcs differently & force them into a very strict gender role (ie man is always big, strong, stoic & masculine whereas woman is always small, dainty, emotional & feminine) and i can definitely understand that it can be uncomfortable being forced into that little box. as a butch lesbian myself i often don't like playing as a stereotypical "submissive feminine woman" & will sometimes choose to play as a man instead to avoid it.

there is absolutely nothing wrong with playing games or exploring characters that are different from you. in fact i think it's very important to learn about other people's experiences. my other game, blood choke, has a lesbian mc but i have no issue with other people playing it; in fact i encourage it!

and now, to be clear, i absolutely am just a random stranger on the internet and there is no way i can extrapolate anything about you and nor do i want to assume anything. but i really really urge you to maybe do some reflecting about why you may feel this way. maybe you are just uncomfortable with being confined to specific gender roles and that's absolutely fair on its own. we live in a patriarchal society that puts a lot of pressure on both women and men to be a certain way. you can express yourself and be emotional as a man, regardless of what society says, if that's what you want. and you can play games as a woman if that makes it easier for you to do that.

but you also just admitted to me that you feel more comfortable playing as a woman in self-insert games because you feel like you can better express yourself as a woman, and that if you had the chance, you would purposefully choose to be a woman in real life.

i feel like i have to let you know that you can actually be a woman in real life, right now, if that is what you really want instead.

at the end of the day i can't tell you what it is that you want nor can i really give you "permission" to do something. maybe none of this really applies to you at all-- again, i'm just a random person on the internet. i don't know you. but based on what you just told me i think it would be worth it for you to sit in these feelings and really think about them and what they may mean. maybe it means nothing. or.... maybe you learn something new about yourself.

either way, just know that what you're doing-- playing as a woman/lesbian-- is fine. especially if it is something that brings you comfort & allows you to express yourself in a way that you feel you normally can't.

much love to you anon 🫶

[lookismstuff]

On Why Vin Stopped Mary

SPOILERS ALERT

I know many of you want to see Mary in action scenes, but Vin didn't stop Mary's intention to kill Taejin because he was being gentlemanly or because he undermined her strengths. He knows just how formidable she is as a fighter.

Vin just didn't want Mary to become another murderer.

I might be wrong and I apologize for this, but from what I read and watch, basically in Korea if you kill someone the murderer label will stay with you for the rest of your life, especially when the reason is not considered righteous (think defending one's country, or one's family). "MURDERER" might be your only label. It might also be your entire family's only label, whether they're complicit in the murder or not.

People will probably vandalize your house. They will probably write the word "Murderer" on the outer walls or on your front door and the stain will be difficult to remove. People will terrorize and bash you and your family in the streets and on the internet and it may last forever and it will haunt you all. People will take note of your records when you apply for jobs, apply for schools, get married, get a bank account. Even though you committed that murder as a minor, your criminal records as a murderer may leak or be exposed and you're done for.

Look at D.G. How the one murder he committed as young James Lee is basically the sword that hang above his head. Remember that both Charles Choi and Eugene had each been using it to control him. Look at Vin, who had to cut off all contacts and leave town. Remember how random strangers jeered and stared at him during the illegal underground fight club scenes when Workers openly called him a murderer.

Vin would never let Mary go through the same agony he'd been going through.

[supersoftly]

I'm not sure whether I should be surprised or not that the people who let randos on the internet vet or condemn strangers via shinigami eyes, are the same people who let randos on the internet vet or condemn donation scams. They really love outsourcing their thinking, don't they?

They really love outsourcing their thinking, don't they?

Imma be real with you and say this is the root of a lot of these kind of issues where it requires critical thinking skills to be applied vigilantly. In all aspects of life, leaving decision making in the hands of others makes you progressively lazier and more apathetic to what control you have around you imho. I'm not trying to be smarmy, it's just what I've witnessed and what I've gone through when I was surrounded by people like this and also personally heavily reliant on the faith of other people or systems. You simply cannot trust that these things will always function usefully in a living, growing environment that changes everyday, only you can be responsible for your own decision making during your life, and extra specially so when it involves being scammed whether it's through money or ideologically so.

[novvaable]

fur baby + life update 🐈🌱

sometimes it’s fun to use tumblr (ig as its intended purpose) to just blog into the void for random strangers in the internet to read 🫶🏼

it’s been almost 3 months (?!?!) since I moved and I’m already slowly but surely planning out how to decorate each room to make it feel like home lol. easier said than done. the kitties and myself appreciate all the extra space, and arguably, the cats have been getting on a lot better as they’re not ontop of one another.

the new job is going .. okay. im not sure if its for me just yet. the whole reason i so desperately wanted to leave my last job was because of the lack of progression and opportunity to earn more money. unfortunately I brought into the dream i was sold when being offered this job that those opportunities existed, when in matter of fact, I really don’t think they do 🫡 the training for the job is a bit intense, so ive promised myself to persevere until I actually get some physical experience in the job and make my decision then. (also because looking / applying / interviewing for jobs is so incredibly tedious).

but ig in the grand scheme of things, I’m heading in the right direction. i have achieved 2/3 new years resolutions - move into a bigger house and get a new job. buuuutt… the caveat of finding a new job was that I wanted to be happy. so I can’t say that’s fully ticked off just yet. we’ll see how it goes!!

[unreleasedtaylorsongs]

Hey so, don’t do this!

I’m not dropping their URLs for obvious reasons (They’re both clearly newly made blogs anyway, possibly because they knew what they were doing was rude) but this is the absolute WORST attitude to have. There is so much to unpack here. and it’s kind of a bit comical. This got kind of long, so I’m putting the rest under a cut.

First off, just because you used the word ‘please’ does not mean you’re being nice or have any manners whatsoever. Second, asking a stranger you never talked to before for something, giving them a deadline of a few days, then telling them to ‘be quick’ and that you ‘need’ something from them is actually so so so insane. I learned that lesson when I was twelve, the first year I had access to the internet. Technically, I learned it before then, because the same rules apply in real life. You don’t talk to strangers that way in real life. Too many people online have this idea that societal rules, general kindness and basic empathy don’t apply once they go online, and it’s one of the worst things that has ever happened to the internet. Also, what the hell do you ‘need’ unreleased demos for? Like, genuinely. I can’t even come up with anything as a joke. And uh, “Girl I know you’re active.” Huh??? I don’t care that you know I’m active, I’m not giving you anything regardless of how chronically online I am since you came off so harsh and demanding right from the start. For the next message, I’m assuming they meant ‘pick up the pace’ which, again, is demanding something from a complete stranger who owes you nothing. So no, I’m not giving anything to anyone who feels entitled enough to demand something from a stranger so brazenly. No one in the unreleased community, or any community I can think of, is willing to share things that they have spent years collecting to someone who demands like this.

As for the second person, I’ll admit, I at least have to admire their dedication. A few messages (the screenshot doesn’t show all of them) spanning across two and a half weeks before they eventually gave up. Kind of like a crazy guy on Tinder constantly messaging someone who has ghosted them due to their obsessive behavior. And that’s what this is! Obsessive behavior! I get being obsessed with Taylor Swift and her unreleased stuff; I am too! But it is not normal to demand for someone’s entire library that they spent over a decade collecting, especially someone that you have never messaged before.

I’d like to add: I know I don’t own any of Taylor’s demos. None of the live recordings, remixes, unreleased, demos, or anything of the sort are truly mine. But that does not mean I didn’t put effort into getting them. So much of my library is ripped from YouTube way back in 2013 with a YouTube to MP3 converter, then dragging it into iTunes and editing the metadata track by track, then photoshopping and editing pictures so I can make album covers for them. Some of my audios are from Vimeo (does that even still exist?) and converted into MP3s. Some of my library is downloaded from Tumblr also over ten years ago from blogs that have since been deactivated. Some of my library comes from sketchy MediaFire files that I had to go through one of those weird shortened links that redirect you to the actual download page. I’ve used so many ad blockers and malware protection programs over the years to get so much into my library. And it’s not even easy to share either. Obviously it’s copyrighted, and although I have a personal Google Drive I keep a ton of backups in for half of the files on my computer, I don’t want that to get taken down if I share music through it, and it would. Even websites like Mega eventually (slowly) catches on and deletes your files and gives you a warning. A few of those and your account is gone.

I’m not trying to be rude, but I’m not rewarding awful behavior. I’ve done enough of that and have learned my lesson. I hope these kinds of people can learn, too. I truthfully think these kinds of people should spend a year or so doing it themselves: scouring the internet for carefully guarded files, having to go through the trial and error of this sort of hobby, having to go through the whole ‘malware or audio file’ game, possibly having people say they want to be friends with you just for them to leave once you send what you’ve collected. My point is that it’s not effortless. You do not google ‘Taylor Swift unreleased download’ and get everything I or other collectors have. And you do not get anything from said collectors by stalking their account to see if they’re active and telling them to ‘pick up the pace’ when they don’t send it in the time you allocated for them without their agreement. Just be respectful to those you want something from. Don’t use people. Be compassionate and considerate. Don’t be like… this.