#but i saw friends !!
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Grief
ref photo by @jawsstone
#artists on tumblr#my friend let me use a really gorgeous photo they took#it made my brain go brrr#and i had to draw this#i usually take my own reference pics so it was cool to work from someone else's#enjoyed drawing this a lot#despite the subject matter#i saw a pretty scene of a narrow alley#with white stairs stained black from people walking on them#and somehow it took my brain here#grief visits every house
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If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)
At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.
Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.
#i think about this story sometimes like yeah I'm proud of them for that too actually. good job baby brothers#they're not babies anymore of course they're turning 20 next year which is crazy#but they're still the type of people who'd do something if they saw something of this sort happen for sure#respectful of women and everyone else too. they're good guys#I'm glad I ended up with them living in my house against my will for like 14 years#anyway i have no idea where i was for all this but my best guess is probably a friends house given the time period#i was always at my besties house lol#i hope she's doing well too actually. haven't spoken in forever...#bestie from greek elementary school... if you're out there... let's get muffins and fanta at the bakery across the street again someday 💜☮️
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EVERY SINGLE DAY there are MILLIONS of characters in their late 20s who get falsely accused of being father figures to teenagers when in reality the description of "weird older cousin" or "step-sibling that moved out before you were born" is 1000000x more apt
#talk tag#IT KILLS ME. REIGEN IS NOT MOB'S DAD. HE HAS A DAD. INGO IS NOT AKARI'S DAD. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CAN ANYONE HEAR ME#(not even necessarily to say that ingo is in his late 20s but still)#(even if he was a 30-40-50 year old no matter how old he is no fucking teenager is gonna call some guy they met as a 15 year old ''dad'')#GAI IS NOT A FATHER FIGURE TO ROCK LEE HE WAS LIKE 13 WHEN HE WAS BORN! PLEASE!!!!!!!!#one time i saw that a person wrote a fic where mario was like a father figure to luigi.#they are TWIN BROTHERS.#not what this about but idk where else i can say anything about this.#just horrible#also sometimes someone is just An Older Friend like no familial relationship just a friend or acquaintance who is a lot older than you
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Springtrap making friends in Dead by Daylight,,
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#springtrap#hillbilly DBD#dead by daylight#fnaf 3#dbd fanart#when I saw this post I knew I’d have to draw something for it#such a bittersweet concept#cause of course with hillbilly’s backstory he would gravitate to springtrap#and tbh William was a genuine child entertainer#I think he would be able to pick up quickly what hillbilly’s deal is#he would be able to tell he’s just a kid#springtrap actually makes friends in DBD who could of guessed that
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one of the differences between good omens the show vs good omens the book that will always fuck me up is the post-bookshop fire scene. crowley goes from picking himself up, dusting himself off, accepting the loss of aziraphale and Just Driving Anyway to completely falling apart. i do get why people have gripes with it being changed so fundamentally, and i've thought about it a lot myself, but i've never been able to bring myself to get mad about it. i always circle back to how the book was written by two best friends. that drunken, wrecked, grief stricken scene was written in a post-pratchett world. he lost his best friend.
#saw that 'i wanna talk to my friend' clip and now i am crying#not to get parasocial but like. you can lose a lot of people in 30 years and i can Feel those years of grief in the show's version#good omens#gnu terry pratchett
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chef with a silver earring
#close friends on the tweeter saw it first#but some nice ppl on the bear tw also liked it so i'm posting it here bc my tw account is going back to private !!#this has been in the drafts since nov 2023 bc im too much of a perfectionist and felt like this was not fully realized. never good enough#it sounds like ive been working on it for a full year but its not the case at all. altogether this was prob 1 week worth of work#but this year was tuff and i abandoned digital art a little bit and didn't work on it at all hsdsafjsdjas#but im setting it free now in hopes so that new art may come. hope some of you out there like it!#also hope in 2025 i can go back to doing a lil more stuff in a more disciplined manner lol#sydney adamu#ayo edebiri#the bear#the bear fx#the bear fanart#my art
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#i saw the tv glow#(not to be Guy Who Posts His Own Letterboxd Review On Tumblr but my friend said I should so)#movies#monty.txt
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i don’t give a shit that he’s 6’2 i want him MOANING and WHIMPERING
#if you saw this no you didn't#me to my friends#i’m sorry but#men whimpering#have me in a CHOKEHOLD#just because you’re tall dumb and handsome doesn’t mean your above getting on your knees and whimpering#he needs to be#submisive and breedable#i hope this reaches the right people#i stg#my thoughts#text post
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did you know if you support merrill in her act 2 mission you get rivalry points with everyone except isabela and varric. anyway merrill support team no one is gonna be mean to her on my watch
extra:
#i love fenris and anders but GOD im gonna throw hands with them everytime they talk to merrill#specially when they are mean when she just saw a friend die LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!!!!!!!#blood magic is literally fine my warden did it my other hawke did it it was all A-Okay#merrill#isabela#varric tethras#hawke#hawk hawke#dragon age#dragon age 2#da2#merrill dragon age#isabela dragon age#merrill da2#isabela da2
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Thank you, Matthew Perry (August 19, 1969 - October 28, 2023)
#matthew perry#chandler bing#friend#mperryedit#byaurore#it's the first thing i saw this morning... literally my entire childhood#f.r.i.e.n.d.s
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sometimes i think im funny
og under cut
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#ive been thinking abt this imgage#mostly cuz i saw someone had redrawn it ages ago with daan and it did say cigaretesssss but my friend said tapes and i thought it was funni#literlallydrew this before work too#tma#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#tim stoker#sort of. hes there for sure#fanart#my art
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hiiii.... been a while since i uploaded anythin... have some daforge ^_^ watching TNG so far has been an Experience for sure
(was gonna color but ive been too lazy nowadays. or i guess busy is the better word. w some personal projects 😏 and work 🙄)
#my art#star trek#daforge#star trek tng#st tng#tng#data soong#geordi la forge#saw an interview clip abt daforge calling themsleves the perceivers... couldve had it all#im a real sucker for friends to lovers what can i say
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww”. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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j… jesus oppa ;____;
#ashsksjsks jesus k-idol era… and when he does his comeback stage…..???#i just want you to know the last thing i saw before my plane took off was an “i’m going to jesus cafe” message from my grandma#and the first thing i saw when i landed fifteen hours later yesterday was 130+ unread messages on kakaotalk#and i opened it and most of it was cutesy photos my grandma had sent me of her and white jesus#also: she is not even christian…. her friends were like wanna come and she was just like WHY NOT?#also… if you’re interested… in japan there’s a manga called 聖☆おにいさん (translated as ‘saint young men’)#which focuses on the lives of roomates jesus and buddha#(also there are fancomics based on this… including. of course. jesus/judas)#christmas
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Unrequited friendship 🥰🐈⬛🦌
#I saw a photo of two friends hugging on Pinterest#and it made me think of these two#because I’m insane I guess????#what’s this??? more toxic yaoi#every time I draw alastor with husk I’m like ‘aha! there’s the evil bastard!’#free husk#hazbin hotel#my doods#hazbin hotel fanart#alastor#radiohusk#husk#human alastor#human husk
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It’s Almost Like This Is all I Do everyday
#merlin#merthur#bbc merlin#Merlin meme#I saw this format and I just had to#My poor friends who have to sit through me yelling about them constantly#merlinbbc#meme
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