#but i love drawing her anyway its great
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every time i draw girl etho it just ends up looking like normal etho but slightly to the left in ways i feel only i can decipher
#nics rambles#look. she's a butch lesbian to me . and she wears baggy clothes that conceal her frame. and she's also transgender. and my own grasp of#gender is strenuous at best#so this is where we end up#but i love drawing her anyway its great
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yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.
Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.
When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.
And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.
With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.
#svsss#mxtx svsss#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#i think him learning how to be a peak lord and cultivation and everything else would help distract him from the internet withdrawal for the#most part. but the moment there's a lull in the day and his mind wanders or he becomes bored or stressed and he instinctively reaches back#for his phone and realizes it isn't there it just sends a spike of panic/frustration/irritation through him because its a familiar comfort#and now its gone. like this is all based off my own experiences from being Chronically Online but i just think its neat to think about#in that same vein i think it also pushes him into getting into the arts on QJP. Like as the peak lord naturally he would be doing this kind#of stuff but hes NOT the peak lord but to keep up appearances he has to know how to do this stuff. and finds it??? actually quite rewarding#even more than getting into an argument online or getting a new merch item. he's making or doing this stuff. he starts drawing and finishes#a piece and regardless of its skill level he feels something unclog in his chest. like sediment being scraped off the bottom of a creek and#being washed downstream. a weight that's been slogging through his veins suddenly untangled. physical proof of his efforts that feels great#starry is incapable of NOT giving her favorite blorbos more hobbies. starry is incapable of not giving her favorites artsy hobbies#this is probably NOT a new or original thought whatsoever but im throwing it out there anyways bc it fascinates me. i love transmigration#and albeit i've only read isekai manhwa/manhua there's a common theme of the people there assimilating into their new lives relatively quic#which i know is for ease of transition and getting to the rest of the story. but WHAT IF.#i have still not read svsss yet and idk when i'll be able to BUT have some thoughts anyways
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(AU)
What if you died and something divine loved you so much it couldn't cope with that fact? What if they tried bringing you back but the result was wrong?
More doodles + rambles below:
Now What if what came back was just off. Looks at the divine without the memories that went back decades. It looks, behaves and works in a way just off enough in a way to make the god unable to look at it. it's not you. it's not. it can't be.
.... but what if what got pulled back was still you, but its- YOU'RE wrong and broken in ways you cant understand anymore.
The apocalypse draws closer and closer and you don't know why every day that passes you seem to be falling more and more apart too. The god is gone. You are alone.
....Anyway yeah i fucked up a perfectly normal Lovestory Au. i gave it anxiety is what i did. sorry for horrid typing in 2nd person trying to explain stuff im bad at explaining <3 i draw, not write for a reason lol.
#great god grove#ggg click clack#ggg thespius#ggg lovestory#dont have a name for this au but its haunted me for a week and i finally relented when i saw the fact gods CAN create sentient things#thanks huzzle for letting me be evil [thumbs up]#ANYWAY I PROMISE THERES A HAPPY ENDING IN MY HEAD IM JUST CRUEL AND EVIL#AND ALSO INCREDIBLY CRINGE. APOLOGIES. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN IM ALONE W MY THOUGHTS W NO ONE TO BOUNCE IDEAS OFF OF.#lovestory except everything went wrong at the last second and now everything sucks. Clicky's alone away from everyone. thespius is JUST GON#Huzzle is absolutely losing it's shit in the corner because it's the one that found out first.#Bauhauzzo is trying to not have the world end#and Missy M is absolutely distraught about how everything's gone sideways so fast and is about to start accidentally flooding the grove#cobi isnt even a god yet. (SAD. I MISS HER ALREADY)#sorry this is probably incomprehensible. oops#i think in images and concepts not words so translating a bunch of those hard.#fun part about this was absoultely drawing faces just ever so off from how i draw click clacks expressions to try and nail it aint right#what being off usually being the mouth#if u have questions feel free to ask. ill just stare at them in fear like a deer in headlights /silly#This is Clicky hes just.... a bit messed up. that *is* him; not a copy to be absolutely clear#...even if thespius doesnt think it is#anyway yeah. purple hyacinths right?#sniles#shrivels up and dies#ggg love and loss au
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@vulpixisananimal
[Soothing Restful Song]
[You hear a bell. Chiming, tolling, calling your name.]
#HIIII PIIIIIX DID U MISS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#i have. normal thoughts on mirabelles new attack. anyway did u know the script project refers to the sound of her reflecting—#—the kings attack as a bell sound. bc i do!#smth smth the bell it tolls for thee. u get it#dont worry abt the fact that theres tears in the attack. im sure thats fine and means absolutely nothing#in other news i found it kinda ironic that her attack is full of change circles. bc its the opposite of change. so i changed it!#all the circles are now incomplete! symmmmbolismmmm :3c#i also think its neat that yours doesnt have her actual Craft Shape so i kept that. instead i made the clock hands into stars. :3c#love drawing meeble. i figured her out last week and its great#my art#sifstem#siffrin system au#isat mirabelle#mirabelle isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time#i was also considering showing her danglys but. hides her change symbols. :3cccccccc#im SO proud of how this turned out. god. i literally went into my sketchbook to doodle it and then suddenly this was on my tablet#its got so many goddamn effect layers too...#worth it lol#im sure mirabelles feeling SO normal abt freezing someone in time. yknow. the thing the king did. im sure thats fine.#im sure its not worrying at all that shes capable of doing that. using the Craft That Fucking Kills You.#god i love the sifstem au its SO COOL
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ringo has never ever looked bad in an alt but my god she's hitting never before seen levels of Help Me lately
#puyo puyo#ringo ando#my stuff#i was on call with my friends when i found out the red spotlights had been released. they can attest that i went so insane#i screamed also. when i saw her#i wanna draw smn for rulue and amitie too because theyre sooo.... theyre so!!!#i love rulue's pants i want those pants. rulue in pants is such a rare treat and its always so great when it happens#and ami's polka dots and frills galore and shes trying to talk like a lady and shes got a medal themed after her usual flower charm??? help#ringo in the furisode was something i was not expecting (everyone's been western style so far) but like. im not complaining#look at her. shes gorgeous. i love her HAIR#step over satan's ponytail. uhh witch's... also ponytail#ringo's coming and shes fabulous#also i think. i think do not quote me on this. the medal she has was handmade and given to her by her clubmates right.#they matched it to her outfit. god get you friends who'll match a handmade gold medal to your seasonal fit#anyway its. well i accidentally didnt sleep to finish this so im going to bed probably now#i leave you with ringo looking so so good. take care of her
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this was the most fun ive had drawing something in like a week please enjoy her!! the dress is from this blog here ^_^
#drawing lace is so hard oh my god but its worth it and it gets fun after a while#tgaa#ryunosuke naruhodo#ryuunosuke naruhodou#she turned out so good im so happy w her#i love when i draw a ryuu im truly proud of like Fuck yes there she is! looking like herself#genderbends are fun…. you people are so correct she makes an excellent woman#i think my official hc is still ryuunosuke cis guy who eventually realizes he doesnt really see himself as any gender—#—but keeps using he/him bc its easy and he doesnt really jive with anything else#but also on the side i think transfem ryu or just a genderbend au is so fun#so anyway yea#i realized that i can draw whatever i want whenever i want for any reason so have girlnosuke#woman kazuma also in lolita might come soon. we’ll seeeee#or maybe masc ryuu in one of the fancy suits on that blog#she/herlock sholmes maybe? i have a fem hmmk draft in my docs rn lmao#regardless. i want a chuunosuke headband now#my art#the great ace attorney
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"Wait is that lore?" moments in Antoine's return stream
These ones are likely jokes, but (you can use it in your headcanons):
With Tubbo, explaining his absence by saying "I was dead, I think, but not anymore, I was tired of being dead"
"I couldn't explain to you, it's out of my understanding how I'm dressed. The human mind cannot comprehend how I'm dressed and so the human brain shows it that way, but it isn't exactly like that. It's not powerful, it's just weird"
"You know me well!" "Heh, I know you as if I made you!" *silence* (closest to maybe serious)
These ones are more serious:
He isn't romantically interested by Cucurucho, he just likes his ass (that totally a human is aro that's what I mean)
He really missed Pomme, he stopped coming because without her it wasn't interesting anymore (this one is just cute)
Very invested in knowing what happened to the eggs while they were away
Accidentally gave Pomme one of the books Ourson (I think it's this one?) gave him, immediately panicking when he realized. When Pomme asks what it was, he first tries to pretend not to understand, and is pretty serious when he tells her that it's nothing; he'll tell her about it one day, and it's his little secret garden, everyone should be allowed to have secrets, don't she think? she isn't against secrets, right?
Certain that the eggs went to some kind of other dimensions/got doubles?? I mean there was a theory inspired by Stranger Things but despite what Pomme is saying he's not letting go of the idea
After asking Pomme if she met dark Cucurucho and she talks about the Watcher: "Je crois pas qu'on parle de la même chose. Là tu me parles de l'oeil, et moi je pense que je te parle de quelque chose d'autre. Je pense que tu me parles du Watcher... là où moi je te parle d'autre chose." ("I think we're not talking about the same thing. Here you're talking about the eye, and me I think I'm talking about something else. I think you're talking about the Watcher... when me I talk about something else" again how does he know the name "Watcher".)
Knows that Maximus is dead, when all the other players seem to have decided to play the "don't know if he's alive or dead" card (bonus: Antoine and Pomme talking about telling Aypierre, and Pomme thinking she won't be able to find the right words "I don't think there are right words..." ok im sad now thanks). Since we're at it, when reading Pomme diary where she worries about Baghera and Antoine being dead, saying they can't be dead, he doesn't share that worry in the slightest, as if he knows Baghera's not dead (this one's dubious and I am very willing to put it as cc!Antoine not thinking rp)
He and Pomme are talking about what she remembers of the Watcher and honestly the whole conversation deserves to be clipped and transcribed. To go with him name dropping the Watcher, he is now only calling it the creature with one eye because that's how Pomme calls it
Pomme explains that the Watcher was observing her and Richas and there was a threatening aura to it, so they immediately fled. Antoine in a very serious voice "You were right to, you were right to, you were right to. Because I think it's this person who was at the origin of your disappearance."
#theres not really lore in his talk with Sunny but they're fun together#completely missed the whole 'you wanna be a star? you're gonna lose your privacy if you do that are you sure?' convo#also the way he's just 'btw have you met my CHILD Pomme? Yeah she's great' you fucking dad#i think antoine will be a sunny defender#him reuniting with Pomme <3#also its fun to rewatch. he's pressing buttons on a snowman decoration. i remember how he loved press the button.#it was foreshadowing.#pomme saying it took her one hour to draw something for Dapper and Antoine jumping to her defense#by saying Leonard de Vinci could take days to make something#qsmp#qsmp antoine#pomme admin must have been so happy for Antoine to be here her lore with her memory loss and what happened to the egg is finally played with#anyway with how antoine was also insistent to learn more about the watcher by questioning pomme#I am betting even more on Antoine knowing things about the Watcher
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silly doodle for my fursona since i made her 11 years ago today :-)
#my art#YAAAAY KADEN BIRTHDAY#featuring her new design bc i keep forgetting to update her ref#ive been a furry for 11 years. isnt that something LMAO#im on fall break now!!! doing a lot of recharging bc the few days before break have been making me wanna eat my keyboard#< nothing crazy bad going on its just the work im doing being super annoying + dealing with a weird bout of imposter syndrome#BUT ANYWAY!!! happy birthday kaden. kissing his big head#i have a couple of things i wanna do for my next tattoo/its just a matter of committing but i Do want to get a cat#< I DO WANNA NOTE kaden and i have dif birthdays :-) mine was at the end of october hehe#but i do draw kaden on my birthday bc he is me but he is also Not Me . but he is. yk LOL#tattoo somewhere to honor kaden. just a standard shorthair/nothing that necessarily reads that im a furry#or the cat having her design bc it changes every now and then bahaha#AND LIKE IM VERY CERTAIN I WANT A CAT TATTOO FOR KADE LOL shes been a staple of my life for Eleven Whole Years#and shes helped me accept parts of myself. bc if i gave her the traits i had/have and i still loved her. then i could love me too#and that has drastically helped with So Much and my therapist says thats actually#a great therapy tool. forget the exact wording but the idea is there#everyone make a fursona now. ur homework is making a fursona and loving them. and then loving urself
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"Apparently I have 'behavioural issues' and am 'a bad influence'? But damn I'm fun!"
more edits || character page || x.x
Tag list (ask to be added or removed): @carrionsflower @statichvm @risingsh0t @simonxriley @tommyarashikage @kanos @bbrocklesnar @confidentandgood @unholymilf @florbelles @thedeadthree @shellibisshe @roofgeese @aezyrraeshh @faerune @tekehu @jackiesarch @minaharkers @sergeiravenov @carlosoliveiraa @rosenfey @greenecreek @queennymeria @heroofpenamstan @virginlucanis @jamessunderlandgf @d-esmond @solasan @bigbywlf @delzinrowe @fenharel @imogenkol
#oc stats*#oc: poko rikihisa#my edits#my ocs#jjk oc#jujutsu kaisen oc#anime oc#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#happy birth to this little shit!!#loves causing her sister headaches more than anything#hates being 'normal'#at least shes got people around her that support the latter#i mean most dont like the fact the sisters dont get along#but its not their place to fix it i guess#apart from anzu stepping in lmao#also you may notice this is a continuation of saes bday post#chasing after her sister yet again lmao#this time from pokos perspective!!#should draw her and hideko together at some point#i think theyd get along great#but anyway hope you like and all that jazz#happy birthday again danger monkey
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So ive been playing a lot of elden ring, and i had no inspiration for what my tarnished should look like, so i just made raki. And now i have 3 rakis.
some lore about each raki under the cut
from left to right :
Tarahn, aka the cockroach, aka raki #3, i play her as a faith/dex build and until very recently she had like. 20 vitality so every ennemy would two shot me (but for some reason i always end up with 1hp left and surviving against all odds. hence the cockroach)
i picked the confessor class because the outfit looked cool, but now part of her lore is unlearning the rigid rules of the golden order with the help of miriel, so thats nice. i'll end my current playthrough with the frenzied flame i think and try to get a good (better ?) ending in ng+
she's a very curious person, eager go learn and discover new things, but this side of her has been very repressed, and she comes across as cold and aloof. She's very stubborn and ruthless (as all rakis are)
Raki, aka the original, one of the main characters of my comic project. They're a cyborg bounty hunter, who doesn't really like being around people. His body language is very stiff but his face really expressive. he can move surprisingly silently, and has made an habit of scaring people who are unaware of his presence. She's also very tired. Please get this cyborg a bed.
She doesnt appear in part one of the story so most info about her is a spoiler. Just know that they want something and will stop at nothing to get it.
Mikhail, aka le ouicheur, aka stupid bear cub, my witcher oc. He's from the school of the bear, and uses more brawn than brain. He really really hate being around people, and thus make a very bad witcher as he will not dare go into villages to claim money for his kills. He tends to use more his fists than his swords, and has fully mastered the sign Aard, with his signature move being an aard powered jump that will send him flying over his ennemies (he doesn't remember how to use the other signs). He cheats at cards, loves coin tricks and sleight of hand, and got adopted by Ezé, a wolf school witcher (and my partner's oc). The most chill of all rakis, but still a raki at heart, dont be fooled by his silly smile, he is still a ruthless and cold warrior.
#elden ring tarnished#witcher oc#cyborg oc#original character art#the artowl#radio isotope#ch : tarahn#ch : raki#ch : mikhail#elden ring is so great y'all#the hyperfixation is hyperfixating#be on the lookout for fanart and... maybe.... comics ?#i really love tarahn i want to tell a bit of her story#radio isotope enjoyers do not lose hope#i think about the story a lot but its not one im ready to tell right now (in terms of pure writing and drawing skills but also#because it has become quite a mess over the years and i need to untangle the themes and plot and weave it into something that make sense#also i dont want to say goodby to these guys and as long as the story isn't written they will still be here)#idk whats going on tonight my usual filter is gone youre having all my thoughts raw and unprocessed#anyway see you soon i hope#maybe with elden ring stuff#maybe with radio isotope#maybe withe other projects who knows
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another request from cohost! my friend asked for traditional inuk hairstyle like qilliqti, which is what i ended up going with! looking up the hairstyles sent me on a sidequest of looking at a bunch of fashion designers with modern takes on traditional clothes, so i also used some of those! so credits for that under the cut vv
jacket- https://www.instagram.com/p/C3QiKIdO0Jp/?img_index=5 jacket 2 (full fashion show with more angles, and a lot of super cool designs, also really cool music)- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp_eAzDu8xU patch- https://www.bradorfabrics.com/products/inukchic-iron-on-patches-celestial-narwhal hair originally from the film atanarjuat the fast runner, but the specific screenshot is here https://www.pinterest.com/pin/53480314313400875/
#originally i was going to give her specific earrings too but they were covered by her hair so i couldnt get it to look quite right#of course for the hair specifically it was hard to find a reference that didnt link back to avatar somehow#but the pictures themselves are real so thats fine#i honestly dont think i fully did the hairstyle justice because braids are not my strong suit#even though i gave her braids in her regular design too#anyway i also was like if im putting her in modern clothes lets make it the modern au. and im signifying that by having her play geoguesser#its actually openguesser tho bc geoguesser makes you pay now???#i wanted to play a round to use for the screenshot but i wasnt about to pay money for it so i played openguesser instead lol#also i kinda just wanted to play it too. not gonna lie#but yeah i really hope i portrayed everything well esp since im taking direct inspo from real designers#i wanna make sure everything is credited. so many of those designs are gorgeous and you guys should go look#and while i went with a more casual everyday look here i would love to draw her in something more intricate sometime too#so yeah i hope it all came out well enough 👍 and that i did the req justice even if im not great at braids#its good practice right?#finn's art#finn's ocs
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@catnatch drew whiffy the squiffy for me for artfight! thank you for drawing my girl she is the best 🥺💙
#splatoon#splatoon oc#whiffy the squiffy (oc)#CAT DID SO GOOD DRAWING HER I LOVE MY GIRL SO MUCH!!! SHES A SQUIFFER ICON TO ME!!!#EVERYONE SAY HI TO WHIFFY THE SQUIFFY!!! cat gave me perms to post the attack she did for me since she wont be posting it herself-#and now i have been enabled to say silly things about my girl in the tags (<- guy who would've still typed these even if cat posted it)#in the midst of playing splatoon with my friends i would talk about whiffing my shots... i eventually said something like-#whiffer the squiffer? and then cat told me i should make whiffer the squiffer an actual character and i was like OK#whiffy is supposed to have a twin brother (whiffy) but i havent gotten around to designing him yet 🤧#EDIT: I WHIFFED MY OWN TAGS I MEANT TO SAY THAT HER BROTHER IS NAMED WHIFFER NOT WHIFFY. GIRL HELP#the twins are mascots for squiffer! they're not very good at aiming but they do their best :) they're very loved by the public to me#anyway that's whiffy :) expect more oc posting from me eventually i have decided im not going to be shy about it anymore. hopefully!#and i would say go follow cat but i feel like everyone has seen me rb cat's posts for the past few months at this point LMAOO#BUT U SHOULD !!! its great if u like yochuke :3#for me! thank you so much!
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(not quite logging back in just venting dont mind me <3 ill reply to everyone later mwah)
#i guess the worst thing about allllllll the times my mother tells me im crazy is that i know she's right lol#like the instant overwhelming need to sh whenever she says it or in fact every time we fight should be enough to confirm it 🤡#like i legit wont calm down until i physically hurt myself preferably also drawing blood. this is not Sane Person Behaviour#anyway whatsapp just spent a few minutes crying curled up on the floor in the kitchen pulling my own hair trying to ✨Not SH✨#because its stupid idiot motherfucking summer and everyone will See#and ended up doing it regardless lol#and its so funny cause like literally the moment i do it im perfectly fine and mentally and emotionally stable again 🥰😇#anyway i love my mom she's great but she did ruin my entire life and me as a person too#and basically all my adult problems can be easily traced back to my psychological nightmare of a childhood#except i cant blame her for that either because she didnt have it easy and she raised me on her own (and unmedicated too)#while my dad didnt really even get many occasions to ruin me on a fundamental level (like he sure did use those few chances he had but yknow#not nearly as many as my mom got)#so i cant just blame my mom and let feminism lose like that#anyway. she should never have had children and i there's nothing i regret more than her husband dying instead of me#ok logging back off byeeeeeeeeee
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Started watching a "problem with greek myth retellings" video and it began with a blurb montage like "Condemned by the misogynist guys of history, this is the true girlboss feminist story of [A WOMAN]" and like. brb writing one of those about crown prince rudolf. It's ok he's like a misunderstood girlboss to me<3
#NASJASKSDFKDSLFDGJDFJ#joking. since those retellings seem to be often bad#fun fact i do have ideas for like a black teen comedy series with mary as the protagonist where the ending is like a harrowing twist#like you think it won't go that far but it does and the point is that she had historical agency and her own problems and personal journey#but in the end it spiralled catastrophically due to both crown prince rudolf related events and others#unfortunately writing one would draw the ire of both misogynist rudolf conspiracy theorists (how dare you suggest women have agency) AND a#certain type of feminist media critiquer person: (1) how dare you cover a topic like that flippantly 2) how dare you make rudolf anything#but an inhuman monster of a r*pist murderer gr**mer or whatever in the story#like idk man.. other male characters portrayed as romantic interests in mainstream media are toxic r*pists all the time. like omg i hate ho#'the great' handles p*ter and catherine because i was rooting for them to remain toxic and for catherine to kill him or whatever but then#she starts falling in love with him in s2 and everyone in tumblr is like omg hot sexy toxic romance. like cant we have ONE series where#straight romance doesnt inevitably become the overbearing focus?? i had wlw ships for that show.. they never pulled through...#anyway um yeah. the way i would portray rudolf in that is that mary sees him as this romantic hero which is emphasised in the way its shot#but he's constantly acting in kinda offputting and strange ways and is occasionally pretty pathetic and weird ASHDJFJF#^^ that's never been a deterrent to anyone ever. most rudolf biographers want to [redacted] him this has been proven by the way they write.#the only ones that dont are me (well not a real biographer but a rudolf enjoyer nonetheless) and brigitte hamann /hj#(she actually doesnt salivate over his appearance like frederick morton does xD only quotes 2 contemporary women commenting on it)
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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when they give us the next cyl units i hope they have fun with the outfits bc if i just see mortal savant felix and robin in m!robin’s exact clothes, or like. chrom’s armor. i will be so upset. give bernadetta her cav vengeance build!! let felix drop the sword and let him punch something!! robin has like every single reclass in awakening, you can do something with that!! like come onnn! i feel like alfonse is the only one they cant really screw up, but i’d be a little disappointed if it was just his dad’s armor. now if it was his mom’s outfit…
#freudian slips#idk maybe its j me but im kinda over the ‘wearing someone else’s clothes’#mostly bc as much as i love brave eirika and shes one of my fav units ever it kinda sucks she is was still tied to ephraim#when the cyl she won had nothing to do with him!#though. felix in dimitri’s armor would be AWESOME. but if hes wearing anyones armor its probably rodrigues#but i just hope they take this chance to do something fun!!#and then robin. like ik m!robin got his own outfit but i am a little scared f!robin might take like validars or chroms or something#bc yk. the eirika thing… yeehoo fire emblem misogyny#but i hope she gets something unique im excited for her!! i hope wada draws her too…#but yeah i think felix and bernadetta getting their popular builds referenced like marianne did would be great#anyways i slept on it. cyl units arent that bad i was j so sad about alear last night :(
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