#but i guess it would be nice to have some.... support? validation?

[traumasurvivors]

hello, do you have resources on recognizing whether or not you're in an abusive/toxic friendship?

I don't, but here's some red flag thoughts I had.

If you try and talk about something they've done that upset you/bothered you, and they turn around and make you feel bad. This might be done by them going "oh, I'm such a terrible person. You shouldn't be friends with me."

They only talk to you or initiate contact if they want something from you.

They "jokingly" say mean things about you.

They compare you to other people. It might be things like "oh, well, so-and-so would do this for me."

They make you feel guilty for having boundaries.

If you're having a bad time, they need to be having a worse time. Nothing can be about you, and the attention always has to be drawn back to them.

They make you feel bad about your interests. "Oh, damn, I guess not everyone has good taste in music.

Constant negativity. They are constantly "raining" on your parade if you're happy about something. Example: You are super happy because you had a great time with your dad. You rave to them about this, and their response is "wow, it must be nice. My dad and I have a terrible relationship." While their feelings are valid, it's really inappropriate if they feel a constant need to bring you down whenever you're happy.

You can't rely on them for support. While it's valid for people to have limits and not be able to provide support all the time because of their own mental health, it isn't okay if a relationship is one-sided and you offer support and they never do.

When you have arguments, they got for "low blows" rather than trying to resolve the conflict. This might mean they scream at you, or throw insults at you, or throw past mistakes in your face.

No one is perfect, and it's understandable that people slip up sometimes and make mistakes. Lash out even. But they should hold themselves accountable for these mistakes, and not make you feel bad for being upset. They also shouldn't laugh off or be dismissive of their own behaviour.

Being passive aggressive.

They pressure you into doing things you don't want to do.

A lot of this falls under manipulation, and I wrote an article about it here.

I want to bring up that nuance is really important. For example: my best friend and I regularly "roast" each other and genuinely find it amusing. But there are certain topics that are off limits, and we'd never do this if it genuinely upset the other.

Obviously, again nuance is important. Sometimes these bad feelings come up for our own reasons and aren't necessarily the other person's fault, but here are some thoughts I had on things you might be feeling if a friendship isn't right for you.

You feel relieved if plans are cancelled.

You feel a feeling of dread when you see a message from them.

You are anxious to tell them things like really good news because they might make you feel bad about it. Or even really bad news, because they might try and compete with you.

You are anxious to tell them if they cross a boundary or upset you.

You withhold telling them the real truth about things. You might be worried they can't be trusted with the information, or that they might use it against you.

You feel trapped or like you have to be their friend.

You feel completely drained by them. Maybe it's hearing their name, seeing their name, or just being around them.

Sorry, I rambled, but hopefully there's something helpful here!

[eir-trixa]

WOTTG SPOILERS AFTER THE CUT

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.

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Can you believe Rick is validating me in my Percy-is-the-most-empathic-character take? I have legal basis but boi does it feel nice to have canon confirmation.

Second that book was short af I got the gist of it all while reading for like an hour.

Third, we addressed everyone else’s trauma. Percy’s still the group therapist LMAO 😭😭😭

Fourth, my son is such a good kid yall, this is why I lose five years of my life when someone insults or when he insults himself jfc my child.

Im honestly still processing and I have to reread the ending. Did it address Percy’s issues? Im going to go with “a bit” and call it a night. I mean, I guess it did? Percy got to unload and help Gale and Hecuba. We got an insight to how he’s managing to stay up and fighting and good despite all the shit he’s put into. Honestly the fact that he saw the humanity in Gale and Hecuba, that he saw their pain and grief and thats what made them trust him, that is so good. And the way he related to them. Goodness. And it highlights again how good a person he is, how much he feels and cares. I mean, he cried cause he had to send Mrs O Leary away, I cant with this kid-

I supposed what Im left unsatisfied with is how he still perceives himself as dumb? Baby, you survived San Fran for two months as a homeless kid without memories and pursued by different monsters who cant die. Youre the furthest thing from dumb.

He cant see this of course and while it was slightly addressed(?) by Annabeth telling him to his face that she doesnt give him enough credit, that he’s pretty smart, I dont think thats enough for addressing this particular issue. There was a time in the middle that he almost snapped because he thought Annabeth probably thinks him too dumb to know what to do next. Which I understand is frustrating to him. But to be fair this book made him look at Annabeth for a solution a lot. Theres also little comments about how when he cant think of anything - which is every 60 seconds apparently according to him- he looks at Annabeth. This doesnt help the co dependent allegations LMAO. Idk, I will die on the Hill that Percy is one of the smartest people in the series, not just emotionally but also in strategy. And theres, of course, nothing wrong with looking at the genius strategist for answers. Ive mixed feelings because definitely this is more of a Percy-insecurity issue than an Annabeth-being-bossy issue. But okay. One more book, heres to hoping we get more heart to heart on that front because Im 999998% sure she doesnt mean to make him feel stupid, Percy’s just got a lot of demons to fight but this in particular they need to figure out together. Still, its obvious how much they care for each other still. If only Dave and Hana did not piss me off at the start Id probably be a little more lenient about this.

Annabeth’s fatal flaw also makes a comeback, we love to see it.

And Sally Estelle Jackson. Now we have to find out wth is Percy’s middle name cause if Sally has one odds are she gave her son too. Trust me. Im Filipino. Iykyk.

Lastly, while I will forever and ever and ever support the trio from pjotv (theyre perfect and have done nothing wrong ever) I can see Rick’s injecting their personalities into the books. Im not sure if he does this on purpose or just subconsciously LMAO. Some of Grover’s dialogue is definitely inspired by Aryan. Percy being Lanky? Walker through and through, especially with his growth spurt lmao, and Annabeth’s confidence? All Leah. I can see what Rick’s trying to do. Ive no opinion on this, just pointing it out. I do love love love the live action. Just. I can see you Rick. You aint slick.

So there. I probably would need to reread the book properly at some point.

[uceyliyahh]

FRIENDS

Summary: “Heart on your sleeve like you've never been loved,” After being in an abusive relationship Imani decided to close herself off until she gets drafted over to the Raw Brand bumping into her best friend Jimmy as she started to catch feelings for him, but will her heart let her fall for him?

Jimmy Uso x Imani Blackwood

word count: 3879

AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.

smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.

comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍

ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.

I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios

Again mdni you have been warned.

TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️ @pinkwithhearts @420days @jstarr86 @empressdede @angiedawn02 @biancasreign @ctinadiva @celesteheartsjey @duhitzkay380 @luuvprincess @bunnnyyys @mzv11 @nbanenefrmdao @xbriexx @prettyfilmz @usoinked

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Ø5

FLASHBACK 5 Imani wrapped up her match, surrounded by the sound of cheers from the crowd. She had initially felt uncertain, wondering if the people watching would support her. To her delight, they did, and that filled her with a deep sense of joy and validation.

After her match, Imani entered the locker room and opened her locker, gathering her belongings. She was eager to head home for the night, as she had no intention of staying for the main event; her focus was on creating music back at the studio.

"You not gonna stay for the main event?" Zilla asked causing Imani to flinch while turning around seeing him standing there.

"Jesus, Isayah you can't be scaring folks like that. I thought about it," She said.

"I mean you can stay and go home afterwards, don't worry about Jordan and his boys trying to get you Imani just know I got your back fasho," he said as Imani smiled at him while nodding her head.

"A'ight, I guess I can stay who's going against who?"

Zilla laughs at her comment about him pursuing the title tonight, and Imani feels a surge of excitement for him, wishing him luck as they both step out of the locker room together.

"I like that moonsault you be doing though Mani, it looks cool as hell,"

"It took a lot of practice to perfect it without feeling like I was going to break my damn neck," Imani replied as she was eating her dinner in the front row seats since the place was small.

"I can tell, have you been keeping touch with Jey and them?"

Imani shook her head in dismay. Ever since her family relocated to a new state because of her father's job, she had lost touch with everyone, including not having their phone numbers anymore.

"Nah, I haven't talked to them in a while. It would be nice though to see them," She said.

"I mean can send out a message to them, we suppose to be having a family outing soon."

Imani fondly recalls the moments when her parents would allow her to visit the Fatu's home to enjoy the company of Jimmy and Jey during family gatherings. Their mother always ensured she had a hearty meal before she left, making those times truly special.

"It's fine I'll probably run into soon or one day,"

FLASHBACK OVER.

JIMMY I was at the gym with my twin brother, working on some bench press reps while he stood by to spot me, ensuring my safety. As I focused on my sets, I suddenly heard him asking me something.

"So, Uce. What's goin' on between you and Imani?" Jey asked.

"She's given herself three weeks to figure out if she's going to keep runnin' from me or let me love her correctly," I said while focusing on my reps.

"If she's runnin' from you do you know the reasoning behind that?"

I paused in the middle of my set, setting the equipment on the rail as I sat up on the bench and turned to look at him. "yeah, she told me why. And I told her she can do allat with me you know I'm not goin to hurt her,"

Imani may try to escape from this situation, but I will always pursue her, regardless of the challenges we face. I am determined that she will be with me, and I truly believe that. I understand her fears and her hesitation to open her heart again, but I promise that my love will be a different experience for her.

"I lay it out there for her what it is and what it ain't, so if she wants to keep runnin' I don't mind chasing." I responded while shrugging my shoulders hearing my brother chuckling at me.

"Mane, you a trip for real dawg. Then what about Trin then? You know she's goin to find out eventually about this,"

"Let her find out about me and Imani I don't care, she wasn't making me happy anyways. I always hated playing pretend in front of the fam Uce it started to become draining, and then her wanting sex every single time shit get bad mmcht was so tiring I don't get that feeling when I'm with Imani," I expressed to him.

I couldn't keep pretending about my feelings anymore. The constant ups and downs with Trin made it incredibly difficult to put on a brave face during family gatherings. Whenever people asked how we were doing, we would just say we were fine, but deep down, I knew I wasn't truly happy.

Seeing Imani at our last family gathering was an overwhelming experience; it felt like a jolt of electricity ran through me, leaving me with goosebumps. She looked absolutely stunning and radiant, especially after not having seen her for so long since her move. When we found ourselves alone together, I struggled to contain my feelings—she is far too precious for someone like Jordan to ever lay a hand on her.

"I understand you fasho Uce, I could tell that you weren't yourself until Imani showed up. I saw that spark in your eyes that I haven't seen in a while."

"I don't know what it is but...Imani has that effect on me so bad...like down bad..I'll do anything for her you know?"

"I can tell you can't keep yo' hands off of the poor thing, just dicking her down every single chance when you get to see her huh?" I pushed him while chuckling as we both began laughing with each other.

I really missed her and was wishing she would reach out to invite me over or something. It's been a while since I visited her at the studio, and I haven't heard from her since then. I hope she's doing okay. I think I'll reach out to her soon just to check in.

"But enough with allat, c'mon so you can spot me uce." Jey said as I rolled my eyes at him while we switched places.

After returning from the gym, I was relaxing at home and scrolling through my social media when I noticed Imani had shared something on her story. She looked absolutely stunning, and I couldn't help but quickly react by liking her post. Just seeing her made my heart race, but I managed to keep my composure.

I could hear Trinity's voice echoing as she made her way down the stairs, her footsteps heavy and determined. She approached me, playfully weaving between my legs while I looked up at her.

"What's up Trin?" I asked.

"Where do you be going after work?" She questioned me as I raised an eyebrow at her.

I didn't want to hide the truth from her about my plans after work. I do spend time with Imani, my best friend, and it's natural for me to be with her often.

"I be with Imani, I'm not finna lie to you Trin. If that's what you wanted me to do ." She let out a bitter laugh at my remark, wishing I would fabricate a story about where I had been, just to stir up some drama, fully aware of how exhausting this situation can be.

"That figures because you smell like her every single time you come home, are you fucking her?" And there it was the question about me fucking her which caused me to chuckle a little bit. "No, I'm not fucking her Trin. I'm only spending time with her that's all." I said lying through my teeth knowing damn well I be fucking her shit in.

She crossed her arms over her chest, clearly unconvinced by my lie. It felt as though she had already figured out the answer to her own question. So why did she feel the need to ask me about what was happening between Imani and me at this moment?

"If you're here just to start some shit Trin, I'm not here for it aight? I'm tired of this on and off shi," she had scoffed at me while rolling her eyes.

"I know you're fucking her! I mean who spends a lot of time with their best friend in the middle of the night?"

"She's working on her new singles album and she just wanted some support Trin what else is there to say?"

"Some support or some dick from you?"   I was taken aback by her unexpected outburst. Even though I had been expecting this moment, it still left me feeling uneasy. I stood up from the couch and headed upstairs, recognizing that I just didn’t have the strength to face the situation at that moment.

She trailed behind me up the stairs, her words spilling out carelessly as I chose to remain silent. Entering our shared bedroom, I felt a wave of frustration wash over me, as if I were carrying a heavy burden of unexpressed anger within.

I silenced her by gently holding her throat, pressing her back onto the bed, my legs positioned between hers, fully aware that this was what she desired from me.

"What you want from me huh?" I asked gazing deeply into her eyes.

She had a smirk on her face knowing that she had me right where she wanted me to be, "I want you to fuck me and forget about her you know that we are meant for each other regardless of what people say," I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her comment, but to steer clear of any more chatter or her endless talking, I leaned in and kissed her. Our lips met passionately as we lost ourselves in the moment.

As we were making out with each other I pulled her shorts down along with her panties beginning to rub her wet folds causing her to moan at my touch.

"This is what you wanted right Trin? Lemme' do all of the work,"

ೃ⁀➷

IMANI I recently spent some time with my best friend Kehlani at NXT, wanting to reconnect and share everything that's been going on in my life. I really needed her insight regarding my situation with Jimmy, especially since I felt lost about what to do once these three weeks are over. To be honest, I've been avoiding him because I've never encountered someone like Jimmy before—he just acts so unpredictably, and it's been overwhelming for me.

I sat in Kehlani's locker room, scrolling through my timeline, when I heard the door creak open. I looked up to see Kehlani chatting with Jaida. A smile spread across my face as I watched her break away from Jaida and rush towards me.

"Oh my god! What are you doing here?" Kehlani gasped as we separated from one another.

"I had to come see my best friend whoop some ass tonight right? And besides I got a day off today so I didn't want to miss anything," I said.

"Oh, I love you so much. But Imani this is Jaida and Jaida this is Imani my best friend I've been telling you about," she introduce us as me and Jaida shook hands with each other.

"Girl, you have to tell me everything like now."

I couldn't help but laugh a little as she told Jaida she'd catch up with her later. I began to share everything that's been going on while I've been away for so long, including finally seeing Jimmy and the others, but then I paused for a moment.

"What happened Mani?" She asked.

I sighed softly, " Jon and I are navigating a situation after we shared a kiss during their family outing, and he's someone I haven't encountered in this way before, Lani." I explained before continuing on.

She raised an eyebrow at me in confusion, "so what's the problem bestie?"

"He's with Trinity and I kept telling him that it was so wrong to do this behind her back but he was so adamant about it, and he's different but I don't think I'm ready to handle something like that he makes me so nervous and flustered every single time he's around Lani...I'm just running from him."

"Girl, is this the same Jonathan Fatu we are talking about?" I nodded my head fiddling with my fingers as she patted my back. "Mani, you can't be running away from a good man like him I know he's dealing with Trin but if he's showing you that he wants you then there's no reason for you to be running," she said.

Kehlani had a point in her words. I realized that if I kept pushing him away, he would eventually grow weary of the chase I was putting him through. Yet, I found myself uncertain about whether I was truly ready to let go.

 Navigating my relationship with Jordan and his manipulative behavior took a significant toll on me, especially on my mental well-being. It felt as though he had no genuine concern for me; his primary focus seemed to be exerting control over my life. It was truly distressing, and I found it unbearable.

"I never dealt with someone like Jimmy Lani," I said.

"You've been knowing him since high school Mani, what's the problem?"

I sighed, "I never dealt with a man that wanted me as much as I wanted them and it scares me because he's so different from Jordan and every single time I'm with him it's like my brain malfunction,"

"Mani, you should be able to let new things happen instead of running away constantly and that's your problem you always run away when something good happens whenever things get bad," she said.

It's true what she said; I tend to retreat when things start to go well. I made a promise to myself, and I often wonder how different things might have been if I hadn't moved away as a teenager. Maybe Jimmy and I would have connected instantly, but there were factors beyond my control that shaped my path.

Kehlani knew me better than anyone well except for Jimmy and Them, I wasn't sure if I wanted this to happen between him and I.

"I don't want to look stupid Lani, that's all I'm worried about right now it's bad enough Jordan embarrassed me who knows what Jimmy can do."

I was just about to say something when I received a notification from Instagram. Someone had sent me a message in my DMs. When I opened it, I was surprised to see a picture from Trinity, showing them and someone else in what appeared to be an elevator. It really caught me off guard.

trinity_fatu: this is all mine so little girl you better back tf off of this one 😘

I felt really unsettled by that message. It made me wonder if she was aware of what was going on between him and me. Was she trying to provoke jealousy on purpose? I can't deny that I felt a twinge of jealousy, but I know I shouldn't. The truth is, he isn't mine, and I don't belong to him—it's as straightforward as that.

Kehlani noticed the shift in my expression, which turned frustrating. I really didn't want to find myself caught up in drama with his girlfriend.

"Was that Trin? Let me see," she said as I showed her the message that Trinity had sent me.

I saw her facial expression changed into as she looked at the picture then the message that Trinity had sent me. "You see why I'm running away from him, I don't need all of this drama between her and I Lani...it's just too much,"

"Mani, don't run away from him. Just talk to him okay?" I nodded my head listening to her as me and her hugged each other.

Kehlani was heading toward the gorilla for her match tonight, and I couldn't help but let out a deep sigh as I read the message, fully aware of the challenges that awaited me with this man.

I just ignored her message, rolling my eyes as I got up from the couch. I made my way to the locker room, heading to my front-row seat. As I was doing that, I received a text from Jimmy, and I couldn't help but let out a deep sigh, feeling reluctant to respond to him.

Big Jim😩 sent a message

Big Jim😩: You good mamas? I haven't heard from you all day just checking in.

I haven't received any messages from him all day. It's amusing to think he was likely with her the entire time. I just left him on read, shaking my head in disbelief.

ೃ⁀➷

After watching Kehlani's match and the main event tonight, I made the decision to head home. I completely overlooked the fact that Jimmy had texted me, but honestly, I wasn't too concerned about it. He should really be focusing on Trinity instead of reaching out to me.

As I neared my apartment, I noticed a car I recognized parked in the lot. A wave of anxiety washed over me as I silently hoped it wasn't Jimmy, ready to confront me about my lack of response to his texts. I switched off my car and gathered my belongings from the back, the sound of my keys jingling echoing in the quiet as I made my way up the steps to my apartment door.

I was caught off guard when I heard someone clear their throat behind me. When I turned around, there was Jimmy, and I instinctively shot him a disapproving glance, rolling my eyes at his unexpected arrival.

"What you want Jimmy?" I questioned firmly as I opened the door to my apartment, realizing that allowing him inside was my first misstep.

As I closed the door behind us, I walked past him, setting my belongings down on the couch. I made my way to the kitchen, intending to prepare something to eat, while he remained still, his gaze fixed on me, as if he were captivated by my every move.

"What's up with this attitude mamas? You left me on read," he responded as I scoffed at him.

"Nigga, we aren't together so what's is there to discuss right now? Shouldn't you be with Trin right now?" As I seasoned the salmon with a blend of spices, I couldn't help but respond with a bit of sass before placing it in the air fryer.

I felt his footsteps approaching from behind, and suddenly, he took hold of me by the back of my throat, forcing me to meet his gaze while my body was pinned against him. "Fix yourself before I do sweetheart,"

"Jonathan, I'm not dealing with this with you. I told you the last time we seen each other,"

Jimmy shook his head, "why are you being like this with me Mani when I wanted to check up on you?"

I stood there with my arms crossed, glancing at the timer on the air fryer, and then I gently pushed him away as I met his gaze.

"Should've thought about that before fucking her, and then have her ass text me some bullshit," Jimmy raised an eyebrow at me in confusion of what I was talking about at the moment, I let out a deep sigh as I walked over to the couch, pulling my phone from my purse. I turned it towards him to show the message she had sent, along with the picture.

He met my gaze, and I could tell he recognized my frustration. I had tried to warn him about this, but he had chosen to ignore my concerns.

"I didn't know she was going to text you Imani," he said.

As I was about to speak, the air fryer chimed, indicating that the food was ready. I walked by Jimmy, who was eagerly waiting, and opened the air fryer. The delightful scent of spices filled the room as I carefully removed the salmon, placing it on a plate before reaching for some hot sauce.

"It doesn't matter, I don't want this and I don't need this drama between me and her just work things out with shawty," I said.

I passed by him once more as I made my way to the living room. I settled onto the couch and switched on the television, all the while he remained there, taken aback by how I was treating him.

I was just about to enjoy my meal when I felt him pressing me back against the couch, positioning himself between my legs and looking deeply into my eyes.

He gently pressed his lips against mine, and I felt myself surrender to him as I wrapped my arms around his neck, drawing him nearer until our bodies met in a warm embrace.

The kiss lingered, unfolding gently and profoundly.

I could feel his tongue exploring my mouth as my fingers tangled in his curls, craving more of him in a way I had never experienced before.

I felt his fingers entwined with mine as he pressed his lips against my neck, sending shivers through me with every kiss. I couldn't help but moan his name, overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment.

"Tell me that you want me mamas, tell me." He murmured softly while tugging on my shirt.

I found myself lifting my shirt, revealing my black lace bra, completely losing my composure around this man, and it was driving me wild.

But was I going to break my walls down for this man?

Jimmy paused for a moment, gazing into my eyes as our foreheads touched. I noticed his lips, a soft shade of pink and red, stained from kissing my neck, leaving a noticeable mark behind.

"Tell me baby, tell me that you want me as much as I do, fuck them three weeks I want you now all to myself."

And he was serious about it too.

"Jimmy...I'm not—"

"I don't want to hear none of that Imani, when you gon' stop runnin' from me?" He cut me off as my innocent eyes looked at his seductive ones.

"I'm not though Jon...I'm just...."

I hesitated for a moment, trying to keep my emotions in check. Perhaps I wasn't prepared for the kind of love he was offering, or maybe I felt unworthy of it, especially knowing he was with someone else. I didn't want to feel overwhelmed or pressured by the situation.

"You're though, why do you keep fighting this?"

"I don't know...I literally don't know Jonathan." I said feeling him getting off of me.

I propped myself up, noticing him standing there, adjusting himself while casting a glance in my direction. His face told a story of frustration and pain, and I felt a wave of regret wash over me—I never intended for things to turn out this way. As I slipped my shirt back on, I watched him turn and walk toward the door, feeling the weight of the moment.

I caught up with him stopping him in his tracks as he looked at me. "Jon...please,"

He shook his head yanking his arm away from me, "when you figure out what you want, then you can hit me up." Jimmy said while placing a kiss on my temple before slamming the door shut.

I lean against the door, tears streaming down my cheeks as I quietly sob, struggling to stifle my cries with my hand while the hiccups start to take over.

 Am I really throwing away something valuable in my life just because I feel the urge to escape? Was this my one opportunity to experience genuine love?

Did I really just mess this up?

FRIENDS

A/n: do you think Imani will finally let Jimmy love her correctly or keep playing games with him.

But I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments below.

STAY UCEY.

04.

[lemonmatronics]

THE POPPY PLAYTIME CHAPTER 3 TRAILER IS SOOO!,?!.?.!.

What a great treat to wake up to—Excuse me while I go insane and spill some thoughts, reactions, theories, and predictions below please

ahem

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SO LIKE FIRST OFF this chapter is gonna fuck, like this looks SO good holy shit

The setting and environment looks amazing but also the new hands mechanic along with the mask ohhhh this is gonna be FUN

Okay rambling about screenshots I took time

First off the environments look great, holy wow

The house itself looks kinda small so idk if that is the orphanage itself or some kind of set. Cause you can see fake sky walls around it, but like this is Playtime Co they would definitely do that to the orphanage also to give an illusion of outside. Either way it looks GREAT and I’m really excited to explore this setting

Just a nice shot of all the critters

I’m really curious if all the critters are gonna be utilized somehow. We know about Catnap and Dogday already, especially after the trailer itself. Though there was also the footage of Bobby running down the hall, looking like a normal plushie, and possibly seeing Hoppy in the trailer too. (I’ll touch on that later)

New Poster

Definitely looks like some company propaganda to try and keep kids from being afraid of CatNap. Judging by the files we got before looks like the results were a mixed bag. Considering the gas is there in the poster it’s definitely a company only poster, not something they could sell outside. They manipulated this kids so bad man :(

A CLEANER LOOK OF THIS THING,,,

THATS A SKELETON COMING OUT OF PUGAPILLAR’S MOUTH…Like that’s just straight up human remains.

I don’t think we’ve ever seen that before in this game. Like blood yeah plenty but BONES? They’re definitely amping things up for this chapter and I’m 100% here for it.

Besides that there’s a ton of plushies and such stabbed onto this weird thing. Is it a shrine? It doesn’t look like it could really move tbh, and if it was meant to be alive those parts aren’t doing anything to help it.

This poor mf

I’ve seen a lot of people speculate this is DogDay, which is a valid guess, but tbh my first thought was Hoppy. You can tell they have long droopy ears, which lines up with both candidates to me. Though I think the ears look a bit slimmer than what Dog Day’d would be, plus the angle on the head looks more like they’re dropping from the top of the head rather than the sides. I feel like if this was DogDay the whole head silhouette would be different because of the ears, which makes me lean towards Hoppy more.

I know her toy gives her long pointed up ears, but going off art and animation her ears can definitely fold

So I don’t think it’s out of the question that as a Bigger Bodies being her ears could fold over like that, especially while stuck like this.

Now I could be the one wrong here but I really think this is Hoppy. Won’t know until the game itself though so, I won’t treat either as divinities yet. It could just as easily be the case everyone else is right and it is DogDay, there’s evidence for that as well (Again, I’ll touch on that later).

So much happened here where do I even start

Obvious out the bat I guess, Kissy Missy is back!! And looks like Poppy isn’t ditching us alone either! Man I cannot tell it Poppy is good or not at this point, gray area? Trailer dialogue definitely sounded like she was supporting us.

“We’re coming! Just hold on!”

It’s really nice seeing Kissy back, really excited to see how she’s gonna help and play into this. I’ve been on the stance that she’s good ever since she helped in chapter 2 so this is really cathartic for me lmao.

As for what Poppy says here I found it interesting, like really interesting. Like, hearing it the first time made me think she casually confirmed something massive interesting. Granted, actually thinking about it longer, it could mean something else entirely. But was that the whole point?

“What’s happening down here is bigger than all of us. I need you. So we can revenge on those monsters who’ve tortured you, who’ve tortured us.”

“Those monsters who’ve tortured you”

Now, once I thought about it this is most likely referring to the literal monsters in the factory. Huggy, Mommy, CatNap, so on and such. But that’s not what my initial assumption was.

When Poppy referred to “monsters”, by first thought was the people working at the factory. I thought she said people at the factory tortured us.

I thought she confirmed that we’re a toy.

Once I thought about it longer, it doesn’t actually confirm that. But what if that’s the entire point? A double meaning line?

Now the player being a toy theory is something that’s been around since chapter 1, a theory I’ve fully stood by since then and still do. I like to think that’s why our character is completely silent, we’re a toy that can’t speak. Mute toys is something we’ve seen plenty of in the factory, more so than toys that actually talk. (Unless you count stuff like the Smiling Critters cartoon or the cardboard cutouts, but I’m talking purely living beings here.)

So while this doesn’t confirm the theory, this line is definitely throwing wood into the fire for me.

DogDay

Wether or not the chained Bigger Body above us DogDay or Hoppy, we have it confirmed here that DogDay is featured heavily in this chapter as an enemy. Again, I really wonder if the other Smiling Critters will show up as threats as well. Maybe a mixed bag of good and bad critters. If the chained up Bigger Body is DogDay, I wonder why he chases us after we assumingely set him free.

One note I’ll give that is to evidence for the chained bigger body being DogDay is that in the thumbnail you can see a shackle on his wrist

His arms are also long and lanky, which is why I won’t completely rule out it possibly being him there. It’s just as possible that it is him, both feel very plausible to me.

Though looking at the game footage, I’m not sure if can can see anything on his wrists. Additionally his arms look much wider than the one in thumbnail.

Additionally, the DogDay in the thumbnail looks so much like a…mascot suit? You can see seams and stitches all over him. Even other Bigger Bodies don’t look like that. Which is something I wanna give its own post to to figure deeper on.

So is this even the same DogDay at all?

It’s not completely out of the question there could be multiple DogDays, though that begs the question, what about other Smiling Critters? What about other toys as a whole?

Here’s my prediction on it. One Bigger Bodies experiment, and then there’s smaller ones approximately the size of their normal toys.

I think the DogDay in the thumbnail is a result of the Bigger Bodies testing, and the one actually chasing us is just a smaller more “normal” DogDay.

But if that’s true then it begs the question, what about other critters? We’ve seen a smaller Bobby before, does she also have a Bigger Bodies version?

Do they all have a Bigger Bodies equivalent?

Is there still a normal CatNap?

Again, all speculation but this chapter especially is really tickling my brain.

And finally we’ve got the man of the hour

Man he is so much lankier than I thought he would be. That definitely explains why his face was so high up on that one cam footage though. Here I was thinking he’d be bulky!

There isn’t too much to say here other than CatNap is definitely gonna be an imposing threat, and I’m very excited to see him in game. So far we’ve mainly seen him through silhouettes, and light peeks at small portions of his design. Seeing him better is game is gonna be a thrill and I’m so ready for it!

Additionally, just for the sake of adding on, we’ve seen these posters apparently from overseas get spread around lately

Both of these definitely look like they’re meant to be company only posters, ones you’d find in the schooling and orphanage areas.

The left poster telling kids to go inside right away when recess is up, nothing super deep here. Just a peek at the schooling that had here, and that these kids had their lives completely contained within the factory.

The second poster is CatNap telling Huggy to go to sleep, another attempt at convincing children CatNap isn’t dangerous. If Huggy is fine they will be too, right?

Anyways that’s my initial thoughts and reactions right after watching the trailer. VERY excited about this game, it’s been awhile since I’ve been able to brainstorm on my own over a game like this so I’m really looking forward to what this chapter has to give.

[thebisexualwreckoning]

Confessions from a fandom insider; or how people will do anything to believe rich white men who pretend to be 'nice guys' over survivors just because said white guy tweeted 'gay rights' or 'women matter'

Aka: a post revealing the reactions of the good omens fandom when the orignal allegations against Neil gaiman came out.

***Edit: someone pointed out to me referring to those who gaiman assaulted as victims emphasizes gaiman's control over them and keeps them in a state of powerlessness and asked me to refer to them as survivors to emphasize their healing instead of keeping them in the same space that they were under gaiman. I will edit the post to reflect the correct language but for clarity's sake and because I believe in holding myself to the same standard I would others, I'm staying accountable for using harmful language and taking note of the fact that I was wrong and am so sorry for referring to these women as victims when they are in fact survivors

***Edit edit because I forgot this is Tumblr: by referring to these women as survivors I don't mean to erase the experience of those who didn't survive or mean to participate in a society that is uncomfortable with allowing people to be victims so that it can pretend we don't need changing on a structural level. No I don't support the idea that a person needs to be a survivor and is required to be resilient or whatever the fuck else for their trauma to be valid. I am still keeping my previous edits however because a. These women survived. That is factually correct. And b. This post is not about those that did not survive but rather about these specific women. So I will use language tailored to these specific women.

Post under cut

I've been a long time member of fandom communities on the internet. So I'm in general familiar with fandom drama and how people react when their favourite authors get exposed as being awful people. I was there when terf lady was exposed and as you can guess, I was there when the allegations against Neil gaiman came out.

Now, I'm not ashamed to admit I was a fan of certain gaiman made media. I enjoyed the adaptations of good omens, sandman, and dead boy detectives but that was mostly it. We ran in the same circles and I reblogged fanart on Tumblr and went about my merry way. So I was adjacent to the gaiman fandom when all this went down. And my god it was hell opening up under their feet. People were denying the allegations, finding strawman reasons for why gaiman couldn't possibly be a predator or have sexually assaulted those women. They were genuinely running smear campaigns.

People were talking about how the reporter is actually a terf and this was all a smear campaign against gaiman by conservatives who wanted to destroy 'the only genuinely non-disingenuous ally the queer community has'. Nobody was talking about why this behaviour might have been exactly the reason scarlett might have gone to a terf in the first place (note: I am not defending terfs. As a trans person I condemn all terfs and this is not in any way meant to be taken as a pro terf post).

There was more discourse about what this meant for good omens s3 rather than how gaiman must have completely ruined the lives of the survivors. it was some of the most unsympathetic self absorbed behaviour I have seen in fandom in all my years in fandom spaces. People were using neurodivergence as an excuse for both why they couldn't give up the material and for gaiman. People called it an anti bdsm campaign (note: this post is NOT anti bdsm or autistic people who don't understand social cues).

For a fandom that had modelled itself after having an accepting and diverse community that most of all supported women's rights, it was surprising to see people so quickly turn against survivors just because it went against their viewpoint of their favourite author. These very same people who would go to bat against amazon for cancelling their favourite show about white gays would not do the same for actual real life breathing women who aren't fictional characters they can read fanfic about.

What's my point with all this? Im talking about a bigger fandom wide trend about forming parasocial relationships with creators of media, especially when they espouse liberal ideology. gaiman's entire shtick was that he was this approachable goofy dad-like figure who openly supported a marginalised community leading many vulnerable people to think that he was that guy in real life. People searching for any form of connection found it when he lovebombed them before revealing his true colours

This doesn't mean we should be forever paranoid of any public figure we come across on the internet but should learn to form firm boundaries as people and fandom with the knowledge that this person could always be revealed to have been bad actually. And we should do this in a way that doesn't shatter our whole worldviews. If giving up his creations is uncomfortable to the point of making you sick then you need to seek out therapy for these parasocial dynamics you form.

Having to rearrange your world view to accept that the persona gaiman created (because at the end of the day interacting with fans is a part of his job, a part he abused, but still a job for which he uses a persona and not the real person he is) is not real or that your favourite show might be cancelled might hurt you but I ask that you explore those feelings in private instead of coming online and yelling about it to the point it overshadows the voices of the victims.

Because this is not normal behaviour. Gaiman sees vulnerable fans as people to exploit and perpetuating fan culture surrounding his work just opens the doors to more people falling prey to his insidious charm. Please, think why you feel the need to defend him instead of the survivors, people we should actually empower.

Because it's always about believing survivors isnt it? Well, at least until it's someone you know (who being cancelled will result in you being sad)

[all-pacas]

What if Chase was the one to get sick in euphoria?? What is his internal monologue??

Short version: we know already, it was called Nobody's Fault, lol.

I don't think it would be a drastically different episode, although Chase's reactions would certainly be different and some of the details would change.

Chase didn't have a problem with the cop, although I don't think that would change all that much: he's still going to freak out when the guy dies/is in pain/etc. The scene where the cop asks Chase to pray with him would be fascinating — Chase's entire life flashing before his eyes — and I bet he'd revert hard to his inner Good Catholic: Chase honestly doesn't seem to consider himself religious, or even really believe in God, but we see in S6 that when he gets pushed into a sharp enough corner he reverts back to his old habits. I bet he prays with the cop. I bet he talks about seminary and how he gave up and didn't believe.

He's not going to have family visiting or supporting him, unlike Foreman. I think he puts more faith in House, though, although honestly Chase does tend to push back against him more than he's given credit for, and I think he'd get just as frustrated when House can't seem to figure it out. He'd just give House a little more slack upfront, you know? He's also more isolated, probably leaning back on religious crutches (can just imagine House calling him out on pretending to believe because it's easier than admitting he's terrified and alone; can also just imagine Chase saying yes, but it sucks less than being alone).

I'm not sure he stabs Cameron with a needle. Don't get me wrong, Chase is every bit opportunistic enough to try something like that. Nor is he some super nice person who would never. But… it takes a certain assertiveness and ego to blackmail/extort/threaten someone like that, you know? Chase is sneaky, not overt.

He probably accuses House (and likely Foreman) of not giving a shit about him, just wanting to let him die, etc. We see Chase gets very passive-aggressive and self-pitying when stressed ("I guess I'm not a good doctor!" in The Mistake), he's a bit defeatist and seeks external validation: he doesn't appear to be getting treated or supported, so he's going to be upset.

I don't think he gives Cameron the medical proxy. At the end of the day, down to the wire, Chase is going to put his faith in House to figure it out; he doesn't need a backup plan or to subvert House in the way Foreman did. Overall I think he kind of goes the episode alone, unhappy with House and Cuddy, freezing out Cameron's probable attempts at compassion, Foreman whomst? We see how he shuts down in Nobody's Fault. Of course, in S2 he's not nearly as emotionally shut down as in S8, but I think in broad strokes… he's going to try and go it alone, he doesn't really want to rely on anyone (while at the same time absolutely believing in House… this is also pre-Finding Judas so Chase is at peak lapdog; the shine hasn't worn off yet), he gets frustrated and avoidant and deep down absolutely wants to be helped and coddled and to reach out to someone.

His version of Forever is also different: Chase might retreat to the ICU again, but this time because he really does want space. Or maybe he rebounds really hard on some random girl, as is also his wont.

[elainsgirl]

“if an elriel had posted that snippet it would have received the same isolated treatment.” No it would not have. I have seen plenty of Elriel fanfics with much more degrading language and actions than that little snippet. I’ve also seen plenty that have banter.

You’re being painted as the bad guys because of how y’all are acting. The way fictional characters are portrayed in a fic is more important to you than how a real person is treated.

Yes it would have.

you just wouldn’t see an elriel post such a heavy snippet randomly with 0 warning to anyone about the language or content it contained. Yes, there are R rated elriel fanfics but guess what? They’re handled with care. The authors actually understand the elriel dynamic, this author - who has literally hated on elriel - does not understand that hence why the fic received such bad criticism. Mmm I have not seen any elriel come out and say they had to add banter to make elriel interesting. The “banter” is naturally written in a way that suits elriel. People are allowed to explore characters & couples however they want but it came off as insulting and a little tone deaf to post such a polarising piece in the elriel tag - when the author has said bad things about elriel and even made fun of us stans. And what made it even worse- there was no content warnings.

How are we acting, anon? Im sure the author is mature enough to understand the difference between genuine elriel accounts and trolls that are trying antagonise the fandom. Most elriels ignored it, some had balls to make a separate post and say what we were all thinking. Some wanted to talk about it in private- all valid. Anythinh we’re saying - isn’t hate. Its not insulting to the author as a person. No genuine account came for the author. I said this twice before - I do not agree with calling the authors writing itself terrible or bad as thats not nice especially knowing and understanding the guts it takes to post your work out there. But I do think how elriels reacted are completely valid. The author isn’t a multi shipper when it comes to elriel, has not said positive things about the ship, made fun of the stans etc. This could have been done in a tactful way it wasn’t done so. Elriels should not have to view a piece of work that truly showed elriel in a bad light - in a tag thats meant to be their safe place,

The funny thing is - as a DR reader I understood the concept the author was going for. Elriel simply did not suit it and elriels weren’t the demographic for it 🤷‍♀️

My condolences to the author, no one deserves to be bullied. No one supports or encourages that behaviour here. If they decides to continue writing elriel - as apparently it was in demand, I can only suggest using the vague tags. In the end its upto them.

But elriels aren’t the bad ones here. I think the whole thing could have been done more maturely and tactically.

[sunfl0wersandillusions]

anyway. when is anybody’s guess (i have 4 days off in the next 6 weeks) but. here are three hypothetical kbms fics that i hope to be the guy to bring to fruition. someday

1) thinkin abt this (https://x.com/3sita_yarou/status/1806973032474595766?s=46 idk how to embed links) fanart by 3sita_tarot on twitter. of uncle mithrun holding obrin’s baby. his facial expressions simultaneously so melancholy and reverent here have me thinkin abt like. mithrun’s learning to experience and accept inherent value, beauty, beyond the constraints of elven society’s definitions of such. obrin and his partner’s love for their child and for one another, despite how noble society has shunned him, audaciously pure and genuine. this i think would work really well alongside kabru, his acceptance in stride over time of laios’s unmasked communication and passionate special interest. both mithrun and kabru have baked into them over time this deference to Da Rules of society, whether it’s elven society’s definition of *value* for mithrun, or kabru’s unique upbringing’s definition of interpersonal communicative *validity*. i see here in mithrun’s acceptance of identifying and owning observation of goodness in the everyday mithrun however struggling, but ultimately resolving to just. call it like he sees it and tell kabru how beautiful he is. whenever it comes to mind. and similarly, where i imagine kabru up to a certain point is a major emotional support of mithrun, i see here kabru allowing himself to be emotionally supported by mithrun, identifying and addressing beyond just denying that such needs even exist. kbms learning to embrace the joys of interpersonal connection beyond their temperance by societal convention.

2. little more toxic. but. some of you are aware of how normal i am about the detail of kabru wanting to learn illusion magic (go read my poem about it on my page i guess) and. thinking about cithis teaching him all hush hush the public can’t know about the king’s advisor fraternizing with this foreign criminal etcetc. she’s earnest and an effective teacher bc they have something of a kinship around their shared deep scrutiny and discerning of people, and a kbms truther as the two of them are dancing around the unique brand of intimacy they share at this point in mithrun’s rehabilitation. but she’s also a bit of an instigator, she lives for the drama (a la neoqueenserenity’s take in their fic good and perilous, if you’re reading this i adore your work xx) so she feeds into kabru’s anxious spiraling rumination on mithrun’s potential feelings and lack thereof, and not-so-subtly encourages him to use his newly developed abilities of magically mind control-esque-ly extracting truth from others… on mithrun, to determine the exact nature of his feelings toward kabru. it’s a low point for him, feeling deep regret for invading the privacy of someone with whom he’s worked to build such singular trust simultaneously with understanding his own fraught mental state and why/how it made him feel like he had to. not justified, but explained. but—what kabru learned was that mithrun’s feelings for kabru… are there, and being under kabru’s influence was the first time mithrun had identified those feelings as such. so mithrun comes to kabru, distraught over how to process these newly realized feelings together with the unsettling invasion of his mind that revealed them. for better or for worse, kabru’s actions didn’t outright destroy the feelings mithrun has for him. and the fact endures that nobody sees, believes in, takes care of mithrun like kabru; mithrun’s not just gonna cut him off forever after this. so as kabru works to regain mithrun’s trust and find it in himself to push past anxiety and insecurity to believe the truth of mithrun’s word without magic, mithrun unpacks the relationship between action(kabru’s) and feeling(his own) and identification thereof.

3. i just think it would be nice if part of mithrun’s journey toward reclaiming desire entailed relearning that he himself is still inherently worthy of being desired. like. as his and kabru’s relationship deepens and grows more physically intimate, mithrun and kabru together tackle mithrun’s staunch avoidance of mirrors; after for so long refusing that relic of his past and thus refusing to ever know his own appearance (he’s just been content the last forty years to know that he is “ugly” by elven standards, that’s all there is to it) i think a really constructive intimate exercise for them would be to stand in front of a mirror together, with kabru showing mithrun all the parts of him he finds beautiful, pink wisps of scars across pale skin like brushstrokes, delicate yet precise and strong hands, etc. mithrun becoming reacquainted with his “ruined” body through the eyes of someone who loves it as it is

can’t promise they’ll be full fics anytime soon but lmk if there’s one you’d especially want to read? i guess? talk to me abt these either way tho pls these two are my saving grace when i come home from this job everyday. and i mean every day. i don’t have another day off until october 8th. ❤️❤️‍🔥✨‼️🤭😍🥰

[boatdotrip]

i'm writing a terusai fic and i think i have to cut this part but i thought it was rlly nice and i wanted to post it somewhere

Saiki Kusuo is many things; quiet, introverted, a psychic powerful enough to be God. Okay, maybe not that many things. In all honestly, Saiki did his absolute best to be as little things as possible, which is hard when he was born with his set of powers. And he was mostly succeeding until the most popular girl in the world, beloved by God Himself, took an interest in him. It’s not like he was trying to be interesting! And despite how hard he tried and the lengths he went through, the girl kept coming back. The most annoying part? The part that makes Saiki want to swim through lava? It’s that he doesn’t mind her company as much as he used to. Good grief, how did this happen?

Here's how it happened:

It starts, as one would guess, with the girl. This girl was born as the perfect baby. So perfect that even the doctor who assisted in her birth couldn’t help but give a ‘wow’. The girl grew up with the love and admiration of the people around her. How could they not? She was beautiful, kind, and charming. Even God loves her! It shows in the way she got everything she ever wanted. But the girl was not stupid. The girl knew she was pretty, she knew she was charming, and she knew she was beloved by all. She also knew that to be perfect, she had to be kind, she had to be simple, she had to be humble. And maybe she grew up less than humble and kind as she pretended to be, but when everyone is constantly gasping in her presence, it’s hard to remain indifferent to her perfection.

Then the girl met the boy. Their meeting was decided upon a whim. The girl simply felt like livening up the boy’s day by talking to him. Except the boy barely cared. In fact, he was more displeased. How could he not be? He was trying to live his life as peaceful and carefree as he could manage, and here comes a girl with her crowd of admirers bringing a bout of trouble that he didn’t want.

While the girl was determined to impress the boy, the boy was more than ready to be her match. Sure, the girl has charisma, her beauty, and the support of the entire human population, but the boy has more than enough powers to dodge her and her ensemble. From teleporting to invisibility, to hypnotizing her into thinking some other person was him, he can do it all.

And yet, for all his godly powers, he can’t seem to rid her of her ‘affections’. The boy knew this wasn’t a real crush, he could read her mind after all! He knew that the girl was simply unused to receiving indifference and was using a crush as a way to validate her arrogance. Which makes it all the more infuriating that this girl would not give up! And beyond that, she’s loved by God! Whatever the girl wants, the girl gets, which makes avoiding her all the more difficult. Because for all of the boy’s abilities, even he couldn’t go against pure, unadulterated luck.

[kianji]

So since BioWare (and possibly other studios) have finally gotten the message that fans will appreciate pansexual characters who can romance anyone no matter gender, race or sex (unless there’s a valid reason in their backstory for them to NOT chose to romance someone) can we eventually see an option for polyamory?

And before anyone brings up the “not EvErYoNe Is PaNsExUaL” argument, I would like to remind you that this post is specifically talking about a group of (very well drawn and animated) piXELS THAT ARE NOT REAL PEOPLE AND THAT I AM IN NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM IMPLYING THAT IT WORK THAT WAY IN REAL LIFE.

Again.

This is a cluster of PIXELS that someone animated, input a code, and is a completely FICTIONAL WORK that has no real impact against the world outside of the game. It’s meant to be fun and enjoyable and an escape. If you can’t learn to separate the two you’ve got bigger problems to be concerned about.

We briefly see the potential in DAO with Zevran and Isabela in The Pearl and from research there’s apparently a full blown polyamory option in Hades with Megaera and Thanatos.

Not that I can speak on quality of the romance as I haven’t played the game, but for it to be an option to fully romance two characters, at the same time, and both accept the romance without issue is fantastic no matter the execution. At least at this point.

Personally I think it’s be an amazing addition as an OPTION for someone who WANTS TO PURSUE SUCH A THING. If you don’t like it or aren’t interested it WOULDN’T PERTAIN TO YOU AND COULD BE SKIPPED JUST LIKE ANY OTHER OPTION YOU AREN’T INTERESTED IN. Hence why it is an OPTION NOT A REQUIREMENT.

Are there mods out there that allow you to romance more than one character?

Yes.

But I don’t want to have to download a mod especially when (as well written as the mod may be) it likely doesn’t change dialogue, or other character interactions with one another meaning it isn’t REALLY what I’m meaning when I talk about a polyamorous relationship. Not to mention the fact that not everyone CAN download a mod.

I just think it would be nifty to be able to have that choice. To romance more than one person and at the least be ameniable to it. On that same note it would also be nice if there was an option to also have they also romance each other. Some characters when not romance by the player will seek out others anyways. It wouldn’t necessarily be that much of a difficult notion for some to be interested in BOTH.

In the wise words of a girl in an Old El Paso commercial, ¿Por qué no los dos?

Should it necessarily be an option for every character?

No.

That wouldn’t make sense in a number of situations varying from the way a character is written to a characters backstory and history, to their beliefs and involvement with certain organizations.

Could it work for certain characters?

Without question.

Fenris, Isabela and Hawke in DA2 would have been a perfect example in a BioWare game for an opportunity for a polyamorous relationship. I’m sure there are plenty of other pairings and games that the same can be said for.

It would be a good way to give representation to something that many people honestly still think of as taboo or only in a strictly sexual manner. And while polyamory in a sexual manner isn’t a dirty or bad thing, it would be nice to see it in an almost domestic type of situation as well, I guess you could call it for my lack of better way to explain it.

Side note: apparently Baldur’s Gate 3 apparently has a few options for polyamory but as I also have not yet played BG3 (NO SPOILERS IT IS ON MY LIST OF GAMES TO PLAY AS SOON AS I FINISH DRAGON AGE) I also can’t attest to what is truly included with their devotion of a polyamorous relationship.

Apparently a character you meet in Act 3 will ask you out when you meet and depending upon who your other or “main” LI is they will be open to the idea or support it. Others will allow it but not be pleased and the rest are completely against the notion (WHICH IS FINE AND A REALLY A GOOD THING AS IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE FOR EVERYONE TO JUST BE ALRIGHT WITH IT). However it truly is a nice touch for someone who wants that.

[cheeeeep]

I remember things were slowly getting better, two steps forward one step back but always moving forward.

I live in a conservative area so I'm speaking from own experience.

We had pride parade that went through our town. We had family friendly events during the day. Yes drag is considered misogynistic but there was something nice about taking my younger siblings to get their faces painted (rainbows and butterflies stuff like that) by drag queens, then we'd go do art at the art gallery and then get food from a local restaurants food truck. They had fundraisers for LGBTQ youth shelters, and talks about how we are all one community. Even some progressive non denomination Christian churches were there in support. We had musical performances. It was so fun.

Sure at night the bars got wild but those were adult only events.

But then I had to stop taking my siblings because the kink people started coming out during the day. Men in latex dog masks and doms walking around with people on leashes. Weird shit.

And when you brought it up you were met with bullshit about how important sex is to the community and we shouldn't "shame" people.

The following year less people went.

Then there was the infighting about identity and why were white cis voices the head of everything. This pride we will focus on pronouns and non binary identity. Trans people of color and then trans people should lead the march because that's "how pride started". No police at the events (which is like I understand police are not the ally but large events by law need to have a police presence).

No more rainbow washing, corporations just want our spaces to advertise. ( Who is going to pay for all this? And while it is valid ,we do live in a capitalist society so we need companies to be outloud that " yes your money is good here, yes you can get loans here." As opposed to before where there was legal discrimination against LGBTQ people at these institutions).

I had already removed myself from those communities by the time I heard that pride was being cancelled by it's own community.

It never came back how it used to. No parade. Maybe some events in the town square and bars would have pride events. Even after the pandemic, nothing really has come back.

I wonder what all the protesters did because their job was done for them.

And I guess that's why I'll always be bitter and angry about this because it's all regressive.

And before I start rambling I really do think the way things are going will back fire.

We went from "we are just like you we are apart of your wider community" to all this weird stuff and othering of people in their own community.

[literali1110]

More 6x01 Chenford Thoughts

So I've had some time to think and read other people's takes on the episode. And I think overall what happened is a little more nuanced than my first reaction so I wanted to share my current thoughts and what I liked and didn't.

Starting from the beginning: When Lucy asks to ride with Tim again, essentially ask him to be TO Tim - this is the beginning of where things start to go wrong IMO. Not only does having them ride together again lessen the impact of their last ride together in 5x12, it completely ignores the fact that they already decided they can't ride together because their personal relationship affects their professional one.

Lucy's first spiral moment: I've seen people say they relate to Lucy's anxiety here, so I don't want to ignore that. But I do kinda wish they hadn't showed her have that spiral out moment while she was on the job, maybe? Or have it be so exaggerated. Although at this point I agree Tim could have said something to help her instead of shaking his head and rolling his eyes (even though Lucy said she knows what he's thinking).

I know they gave excuses for Nyla and Angela (although I think the excuse for Angela wasn't really a good excuse), but I do think they are probably more capable of giving Lucy the professional validation she needs in this moment...

At the actual crime scene: I do think Tim was a little bit in a tough spot... If he gave her the answer, she probably would have been upset anyway. And he did ask her what she wanted him to do and ultimately listened to her. I guess his decision could have led to a murderer getting away, so probably not the best professional choice but again, we already had a whole episode talking about how Tim doesn't make good professional decisions when his girlfriend's reputation is at stake.

I'm not mad at him for how the whole precinct made fun of Lucy, they make fun of everyone. It just would be nice to have some good confident Lucy moments. I want to see her PROGRESS from the TO/rookie dynamic and really come into her own. In fact, one of the good moments was from the episode when Tim was in the hospital and Nyla gives her a pep talk...just further highlighting that in this case, her storyline might have been better if she wasn't riding with Tim.

With the fight scene itself: it seems everyone is in consensus that Tim was trying to be supportive. And on rewatch I still believe this is the case because he starts out by saying she should take the exam and even when he agrees she can wait, he mentions she can still do UC in the meantime. So I do think that in that moment Lucy was reading into something that wasn't there and lashing because of her own insecurities. However, I do see the arguement that Tim could have realized that and tried to react to it better.

And that's why the last scene to me felt very disconnected from the main issue this episode - which was Lucy feeling insecure. She brings up that Tim is being unsupportive because of his own reservations - except, he was trying to be supportive in the previous conversation! So I just don't think this was a way the "Tim's feelings about UC" conversation should have been brought up - even though I agree it is a conversation that needs to be had.

(And I don't really understand what Lucy meant by 'undermining', if she's still referring to his "being unsupportive".)

And Tim is obviously upset by that and walks away, while I think he should have stayed and talked to her about the real issue at hand. I've seen people mention that this also ties back to how Lucy doesn't have support from her parents and that's something that we've never even seen them talk about together on screen (we never saw her tell Tim about the last time her mom came over in S3).

Anyway, I guess what I'm saying is there are two topics here. 1. Lucy's confidence and career path. 2. Tim's feelings about UC and how he is going to deal with what Lucy chooses. And maybe they would have been able to have each of these storylines really shine if they hadn't mixed them all up together in this episode and kept them riding together. Have them work our their professional storylines separately, or with the help of other characters, but come home and discuss how it's all affecting them personally.

(Of course, you could argue that it's all connected for Lucy, she's the one factoring Tim's feelings into her decision, and there's something to that, but still, I just want to see a new and better dynamic for them, together and apart, that isn't the old TO/rookie one.)

My dream for Lucy actually is that she goes into that interview room with Primm and just owns up to what she did: yeah, I managed to manipulate 5 police officers in a trade, so just think what I can do in an interrogation room!

[after-witch]

messages

I got a lot of lovely messages about my back pain at my first day of work so I'm answering them all in one post!

thank you for the kind messages & logical responses, I really really really really truly appreciate it when people take the time out to send something thoughtful to me.

under a keep reading!

Anonymous asked:

I'm not sure if it'll help at all or if you could use one, but there's some companies that make cushions that are portable (or semi portable) for office work and truck driving and stuff, they can help with bad chairs and back pain (I got one for my mom years ago after an injury, she quite liked it) (I'm so sorry if this unsolicited advice is unwelcome)

no it's not unwelcome! I have one for strapping into chairs that I got last year, but tbh I found that a rolled up pillow was better for my back, at least with the chair I have.

Anonymous asked:

hello Theo! it's okay to feel the way you feel after your first day. a new job is a very stressful experience and there's an element of shock, because you rapidly enter a new environment and are required to adjust to it very promptly.

I'm more than sure that neither your boss, nor your colleagues will be against it if you bring yourself a pillow to support your back to work. you can start small with a pillow, if you feel awkward about more significant adjustments, and then later negotiate a question of bringing a more comfortable chair, if you have resources. you need to be a special sort of asshole to start picking on your employee for a back pillow.

this is an immediate health need that should be met and an absolutely valid reason to request making adjustments on your workplace, doctor note or not. 1) the more comfortable you make yourself the more chances are that it will improve your overall performance; 2) from the employers's POV accommodating to the needs of an already on-boarded employee is better than going through the hiring process all over again.

I wish you all the best and I am sure you will do great once you adjust! sending you a mental hug

"shock" definitely fits… it's all very fast and just, jarring I guess?

I brought a cushion today and no one said anything. I did find out what I need to do in terms of requesting accomodations via an online FAQ (I didn't want to ask my manager so early;;) but I will need a doctor to fill out a form, so I have to wait until next month when I have health insurance.

Thank you for the kind words and logical thought process. I sometimes just need people who are not me, currently in hysterical emotional frenzy, to be like no, this is not a big deal, only assholes will care about a pillow and employer's would rather complete an accommodation request then find & hire someone new.

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Anonymous asked:

You absolutely should ask for accommodations this early. They hired you because they know you were right for the job, they want you there, so they will help make it easier for you. They are obviously nice people so ask.

You've been through alot of stress and anxiety recently so having that all build up on you after your first day is normal.

It's hard to not think negatively I know but don't let your brain spiral you until you have talked to them. We are always are own worse enemies!

It will be fine, you will be fine

It turns out I do need a physician to fill out a form so I will have to wait until next month when I have insurance. But thank you for the logical thoughts... I get so wrapped up when I feel negative emotions, I kind of lose myself in them. I brought a cushion today and no one said anything.

I have been really stressed & anxious and it's kind of like the Cherry on Top when something went wrong with my back. I'm always waiting for something bad to happen so to speak, when things go right... so when my back hurt so bad yesterday I was just like "Welp!! here it is!!!! right on cue!"

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Anonymous asked:

First few times I took a flight I dealt with horrible muscular pains the days after, the first few days I could barely walk each time. The reason why that used to happen to me, even though I thought I was relaxed and just sitting, was because I was unconsciously straining my muscles due to stress I wasn’t aware of. Eventually the whole thing became casual to me, so the stress and the pain went away and these days I’m completely unaffected.

Of course a condition such as yours might further exacerbate the pain, but as you get used to the new climate and process I doubt you’ll have to deal with it for months or years. It’ll become like sitting at home.

I think for sure, I was straining when sitting at the chair, because it doesn't have the same type of back (nor is it as wide) as my chair at home... so I feel like my back muscles were straining for hours and I didn't think about it. But also the chair is rather awful (other people were complaining about them, especially with it hurting their thighs!) so I hope I can get an accommodation request.

[leivyathan]

AHEM sorry this is gonna be super duper random, but in note of you (mostly) leaving the TSBS fandom, I just wanna say thank you for sticking around as long as you have!!!

I too pretty much detached myself from TSAMS/TSBS around the time of the Nexus arc, because I really hated how it was played out/everything that went down in it (New Moon was done so damn dirty 💢), but for the longest time I felt like I was a fish out of water when it came to my opinions! But then I found you!!!

I fucking HATE Ruin, haha. I despise him, and seeing so many love him- while of course I left them to themselves- it always made me a little mad and upset to see. Then there was you being so openly loud about your hatred for such a popular character, it's admirable as hell, and I super appreciate it!!! The fact that he got away with what he did with basically no punishment aside from Nexus (good on Nexus for all that he did to Ruin btw 💗) makes me so upset, and it's just nice to know I'm not alone in feeling that!

For however long you stay in the fandom, or keep watching EAPS, I wish you luck and a good time! You more than deserve it, friend 💗💗💗

Oh… Wow

I've had to take my time processing these words for a few hours, not because they're a bad thing in any way, on the contrary, I'm not at all used to receiving any kind of validation when expressing my honest dislike towards something, even when that something doesn't exist; at least not from people I don't know. So it feels weird, in a good way.

Thank you for sharing your kind words with me.

I really have no worries about expressing these kinds of opinions as long as I follow some simple rules that at least to me are common sense:

If for some reason, motive or circumstance I have to express dislike/hate towards a character in a place that is not my own blog, I will do so in the most polite and respectful way possible, based on the canonical reasons and facts that support my dislike and not simply writing insults.

I will never go to talk badly in a space for fans of the character I hate, I'm not an idiot, why the hell would I go to a place with people who do enjoy the character just to say why I don't like that character? It's dumb.

My blog is my safe space, it belongs to me, and therefore I consider that I can write my most honest opinions about said character, since that way if someone doesn't agree with me, they simply have to block me. That way they won't have to read it as an insult and I wish eternal suffering to the character in two different languages ​​lol

And I think this is pretty obvious but I guess it never hurts to say it because there are always people with poor reading comprehension: The fact that I hate or detest with all my soul one or more characters, does not mean that this hatred is also directed at the creator or voice actor of said character. Because yes, I hate Ruin and many Eclipses with all my heart, but at the same time I love Solar and respect Sun, and even if Davis didn't have any character that I liked, I wouldn't insult him vulgarly in any way, neither him nor any other member of the Staff. I can criticize them, in an educated way and having reasons for my opinions, but I can never disrespect them with insults.

Anyway, at least for me it is very cathartic to express this kind of things because I feel that without a place to be really honest and direct about my opinions, I would be drowning in poison, and luckily I have my blog and other personal accounts for that. Which again, others can very easily block

I hope that you also manage to have a safe space where you can be honest without bothering others or fearing reprisals for your opinions that do not coincide with the majority.

Because at least in this specific case, it is simply illogical for someone to judge you for hating a fictional character who turns out to be a manipulative, genocidal liar among many other things. Don't feel bad about it. Have a nice day and take care of yourself`~

[youremyheaven]

"(Mercurials are unfairly critical of others, have you noticed?) and she frequently took digs at me and was one of those people who make jokes at the expense of others."

on at least 5 separate occasions throughout the years i, with the help of another friend, have had to sit down and explain to my mercurial friend that she has to think before she speaks and how you can't just constantly insult people 💀 she's genuinely one of the most critical people i know, some examples include her walking around every inch of my island in animal crossing and tearing apart everything she saw for like an HOUR. yes it was in a video game, and yes im still salty!! she also would ask to read my creative writing or essays and then annotate it with her criticisms WITHOUT ME ASKING HER TO 😭😭 i remember the first time she graded my short story i wrote for fun an F and i was just staring in utter disbelief

she also would constantly make fun of peoples looks in a joking way (myself included) and when i told her to stop she'd play innocent like it was just a harmless joke, begrudgingly apologize, and do it again like a week later. i've observed this sort of underhanded behaviour in two mercury women so i think they might have a habit of it? i get complimented a lot and yes i'm tooting my own horn here but i am very good looking however she had an OBSESSION with getting unflattering photos of me and then sending them to our friends "as a joke" and then would play the victim when i got mad. like sorry i don't want our whole social circle thinking i look like albino shrek omg

OMG BESTIEEE I FEEL SO SEEN IM GOING TO CRY,, WE SHOULD START A SUPPORT GROUP FR

the biggest reason why i cant stand Mercurial women is how theyre sooo deeply insecure that they'll tear apart others just to feel better about themselves

yearsss ago I got a really cute bag for really cheap and i was talking about it with my Mercurial friend and she said "it looks ugly thats why it was cheap" and she was carrying around a tattered, worn out, faded ass bag lmaooo

another mercurial girl who was average looking criticized practically everybody we knew for being ugly. she wore the shittiest clothes and criticized other people's sense of style

an Ashlesha Moon girl i knew never said one nice thing about me but often praised our other friends for no reason and made them sound like the second coming of Cleopatra,, i called her out on it and she told me "i thought you heard enough from others, i didnt know you were desperate for validation from me as well" 💀💀

THE BACKHANDED COMMENTS u mentioned??? bestieee we're all victims here 😭😭

so between 8th and 10th grade, i was in an extremely abusive homoerotic friendship with an Ashlesha Moon,,, she was always putting me down for no reason. i kinda sing,, i am not a brilliant singer but i have won prizes in school for singing so i know i dont suck as a singer. one time she asked me to sing for her on call and then she was silent and said "its not exactly brilliant but its not horrible i guess" 10 yrs later, i wish i couldve reached out through the phone to smack her face,,, i was in my poet era back then and tbh my poetry was pretty good if i say so myself and this girl??? always accused me of plagiarism,, i took it in my stride bc i was like "ok if u think im THAT good then what do i do" lol.

i could go on but ill stop here ,,, i hope i never meet another mercurial again amen

[lucky-clover-gazette]

fandom/feelings vent i just really wanted out of my system, seriously not targeted at any one person or thing:

there are few things that make me more uncomfortably aware of my attachment issues than seeing multishipping or polyshipping of fictional pairings i really care about. i think because i put so much of myself into writing about fictional relationships, and one of my greatest fears in a relationship would be my partner wanting to be open, it’s an understandable but not *valid* emotional response. but still, i live in my head, and have to manage it. it sucks.

like, i’ve drafted this post several times. i love fandom culture and shipping communities, and it sucks that a very present thing in those spaces is such a ridiculous sore spot for me. i feel like i’m less able to support people making cool things, who enjoy the same stories i enjoy.

i never want to degrade the comfort and importance stories and relationships like these have in people’s lives. i love creating things that are close to my heart, and the reasons i care about these characters and ships are roughly the same as anyone else’s.

but it’s really bad, man, the way this stuff gets to me. like, i’m sorry to overshare, but the idea of a ship i really care about being open legitimately makes me feel like a cornered prey animal. trouble breathing, tearing up, can’t focus on anything else, heart beating fast. i understand that this is not a normal response to such an inconsequential and somewhat avoidable stimulus. while i’m not about to share the reasons why i have this trigger, i can assure you they make sense as a source of trauma. the problem is that my irrational trauma response is not a valid equivalent to moral disgust or discomfort, and it’s really frustrating that i can’t just be neutral.

rationally, i know it’s all projection, and has nothing to do with these fictional characters or stories, or the people making fan content. but i also can’t deny the very real way my body physically reacts to even the notion of non-monogamy in relationships i care about.

and i’m not just talking fandom stuff here, i live in a city where more than half of the queer people my age seem to self-identify as ethically non-monogamous or poly. both in fandom and real life queer spaces, it’s almost like i’m missing out on the party because the way a lot of people like to party makes me feel profoundly trapped, powerless, betrayed, insulted, and abandoned, which are all feelings i do not handle well.

more than anything, i just wish i could be normal about this very present facet of fandom/shipping culture and even enjoy it on occasion. when it’s not like my “otp” or whatever i really don’t mind at all. i guess i just see so much almost aggressive positivity about like “character has two hands” memes and stuff like that, where it almost makes me feel like a bad person for needing monogamy for a fictional or real-life relationship to feel safe. and while i do believe open-mindedness should be a core tenant of social spaces, i also feel alone with these rotten feelings, and i can’t really channel them creatively in a way that wouldn’t just upset me or make other people feel bad.

there is no point to this post really, just kind of wondering if anyone has felt this way/has advice beyond the obvious and very valid basics like “only interact with content you want to see,” and “what works for some people does not have to work for you, and vice versa.” i seriously have no judgment of fandom friends multishipping or polyshipping, or the idea of those relationships themselves. mostly, the presence of those ideas just cause me an irrational amount of discomfort because of past experiences, and i wish i could fix that part of myself. not saying i ever want to be poly or write those kinds of stories, but not being embarrassingly triggered would be a great first step. and i guess ultimately it would just be nice to feel a little less alone about having this problem.