#but i dont want it to upset anyone who is sensitive to that stuff so i figure better safe than sorry

[frostbite-the-bat]

talked w/ a friend about this and wanted to post something similar yesterday after a convo i saw also

about people criticizing ttcc / ttcc fans for just... being cog fans? being cog centric? usually coming from people who only like the toons.

and everyone likes what they like! it's okay! but saying that people who like the cogs are horrible and support the bad things they do, is just blatantly wrong. i thought we knew that enjoying villainous and morally Bad / grey characters is... okay? it doesn't mean you support what they do. it's interesting to explore these topics.

i've seen many people just... paint anyone who likes the cogs as horrible because they're "apologists of x and y" and... i dunno. rubs me the wrong way! you do have a point and recognize the cogs do bad things, but liking them as characters means nothing about who you are as a person.

and this is not to say that people who are in toontown for the toons are bad. hell! they are right this IS toontown. i may be on the cog liker side but i like the toons! maybe ocs more than the npcs - mostly because i like my friends and the sheer creativity the toons can bring out!!

SO what i wanna say... i dunno. let's not point fingers...? let's have fun in a goofy cartoon game together??? also complaining about people liking VILLAIN ROBOTS on TUMBLR is kind of funny to me. do you realize where you are. but then again a lot of this i see on discord and in-game as well since i avoid things on tumblr... i am a sensitive little fella i avoid misty fight bc of One Really mean "Critic" guy i saw there and i have been shivering in my bootsies since. so you get me

but like yes ttcc is more cog centric but... that's okay? things could be written better and i still wanna speak on it, and i do thing the toons deserve attention and better writing... but the fact it focuses on the cogs isn't... bad? if you don't like how con centric it is you can go play ttr...? god forbid people have fun and explore the villain's side of things...? i'm not saying either toontown server is better or worse than the other... and everyone can like their own things!!

but like... people will just like the cogs and that's okay and it doesn't make you bad. let's all be friends okay? both sides may be going at each other's necks in-game and the cogs in fact do horrible things - but it's what makes them fun, and it gives the toons things to do in the game!! but we don't gotta !!!!!!!! i may be really sarcastic and sometimes mean in private but like that's me just privately sassing, deep down i think people should just... y'know..? enjoy things.

so yea that's the guzma / cathal thought of today. toon people cog people both people are all awesome as fuck and you keep doing what you're doing i love you toontown isn't toontown without you

[bambinification]

Yknow how people say having to live with your parents forever as a disabled adult gives you poison damage? Yeah.

[yizhou-time]

A RANT ON MINORS AND NSFW POSTS

This is a quick one but I feel like it needs to be said because it’s getting out of hand for not just writers but also minors. As much as we don’t want minors reading NSFW content it’s basically impossible for a number of reasons:

1) The ATEEZ writing community is full of it. Whether people write it because it performs well or they enjoy it, it’s everywhere. It’s becoming rare to see SFW posts in the main two tags (ateez x reader, ateez imagines) and when people are trying to look for something to read and that’s all there is they’re going to read it. It’s basically become downright porn plastered everywhere, what else are they going to read?

2) It’s not being tagged as NSFW or MINORS DONT INTERACT. For whatever reason people aren’t tagging it and it’s just really weird. Even as an adult I don’t want to read NSFW stuff and yet when it’s untagged I come across it (the whole reason I decided to write this is because I was reading a fic this morning that jumps into smut without warning). You can say people choose what they read and if they ignore the tags it's on them but when it's not being tagged as such it's not like people have a choice. I’m an adult and I know when to stop, some minors will just keep reading.

3) a) People are tagging it wrong. Calling smut suggestive when they’re having actual sex is crazy. Some people have been tagging it as a SMAU which means social media au, kids will read that thinking they’re going to see some fake twitter or fake messages and they’re met with smut instead.

3) b) People are using other tags (ateez angst, ateez fluff) for smut. Regardless of if there’s plot keep smut out of those tags so they can be used correctly.

4) Some authors don’t block faceless/blank/ageless blogs (even when they say they have a rule for it). On any site (including YouTube when it comes to age restricted content) age can be verified with a press of a button before the viewer can start watching or you can simply change the year you were born in, but it then argues that they can read what they want here regardless of how it makes an author feel because they can do it online. They can talk to an author in DM and through their Inbox, they can’t talk to a pornstar so they’ll never know or have that lurking feeling. Block people that you aren’t sure of, even if they’re a big account or your post is doing well, it’s not worth it when there’s kids reading it.

5) Some authors don’t display their own age. This is a short one but I know so many NSFW authors who aren’t displaying their age and yet other writers still interact with them, going against their own ageless/faceless blog rule, for what I don’t know. That could be a 14 year old or a 40 year old and we don’t even know who’s in their Inbox.

6) There’s no one controlling what content the minor is reading. Although we can’t do anything about that that doesn’t mean we can’t do what we can, they may read it anyway, but if you look at the contributing factors there is something we as a community can do.

I'm well aware this post is giving them the benefit of the doubt but can you blame a kid for acting like one? As much as we get mad at them for reading NSFW posts for whatever reasons at the end of the day we have to be doing something about it too. Both parties should take responsibility and try to combat it.

This is in no way a targeted post so if you choose to ignore it and feel that you’re not part of the problem or you’re just not interested, that’s fine I won't be offended but I strongly urge to think about if you relate to even just one of the point and then do something about it.

I'm well aware that this is a sensitive topic that doesn't get spoken about because it just isn't or when it is spoken about it gets shut down by people who accidently read it the wrong way. This post isn't to hurt or upset people or accuse anyone of anything bad, just pointing out some things we could all collectively do better. If you do believe this post has hurt you or I’ve said anything that has come across offensive to you please message me about it so I can know what I did wrong!

[jjtheresidentbaby]

idk if u still do supernatural but r u open to a fic of little sam and cg dean? (i dont ship them i just love the brother dynamic they got)

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ not true ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

|| dean winchester & sam winchester

a/n: ofc I still do spn!! I still write for all the fandoms listed on my navigation post unless they’re crossed out

warnings: hurt/comfort, swearing, set in season 1, rude people, protective dean, pet names talk of jess’ death/cg!jess

-

Dean feels Sam's face tuck into his neck before he sees his brother walk over, Sam presses himself into Deans side so something is obviously wrong.

"Sammy?" He asks, turning on his feet to look at Sam's face, his eyes glisten with un-shed tears, nose sniffling after a second. Dean feels dread twist up in his gut, this hunt should be an easy salt and burn, they had come to this shop to ask a few routine questions about the owner who had died and since come back to haunt the place that his daughter now owns. Sam shouldn’t be upset or hurt at all.

"Hey, hey, sweetheart what’s wrong?” Deans hand comes to cradle Sam’s cheek before he can stop himself, he knows that Sam has slipped into his headspace, it’s written all over his face.

“Nothin’ just some guy.” He mumbles and a spike of anger flares in Deans chest. This is the fourth hunt in that past however many months that someone’s said something about Sam, whether it be about his “childish” behavior or the rambles he gives on cases that are too intricate for the local pd to understand. Both make Dean angry, protective, but the comments about how “clingy” or “young” Sam is really get to him.

His brother has been through a lot throughout his life, something that Dean is keenly aware of. The latest trauma is Jess dying, it had shook Sam to his core, just like when Mary died and John became a mess. But they’re working through it and Sam regressing has been helpful, it’s only four months into Dean finding out about the coping mechanism and yet he’s fallen comfortably into the role of a caregiver for Sam. A role that Jess used to fill, Dean is always sure to be sensitive when that comes up.

The last thing Sam should have to deal with is a bunch of assholes who have nothing better to do than poke fun at someone they don’t know. It gets to Dean in different ways than it does Sam, the older Winchester wants to hunt the people down and give them a piece of his mind, while Sam would rather Dean leave it and let Sam latch around him a little more than normal.

It’s how Dean finds his hand gripped tightly in Sam’s as they walk down the crooked sidewalk back to the Impala, thankfully not wearing suits as he’s sure it’d be an odd sight for anyone passing by. It’s not a long walk by any means but Dean can feel his mind spiraling the more Sam squishes against his side, whatever was said must’ve been bad, really bad.

“Hey it’s okay Sammy, it’s just us now.” Dean assures as soft as he can. Sam’s staring up at him from where his head is rested on Deans side, his body halfway slid down the bench of the impala so he can be smaller than Dean. It’s something Dean noticed almost immediately, Sam always slumps himself down or curls his shoulders in when he’s regressed, just trying to shrink himself to be physically tinier.

“Can you tell me what they said? You don’t have to but if I know I might be able to help more.” There’s a low rumble as Dean drives down the road, now thankful that their motel is just outside of town and not in the middle where they could run into more rude people.

“I- I was just asking questions about the girl we’re trying to help but this- this guy came in and started to say stuff about how nobody like me could really help her.” He sniffles through the explanation and Dean has to focus half his energy on not turning around to go tear that guy a new one. It’d do no good, sure it’d satisfy him, but Sam would still be upset and probably even more so knowing Dean got into a fight because of him, despite none of it ever being Sam’s fault. The kids got a heart of gold that people love to prey on.

“That’s not true, it will never be true Sammy. You are an amazing hunter and anyone would be lucky to have your help.” The compliments fire off in instinct, of course Sam’s a good hunter, of course he’d be the person you’d want to get help from, Deans never thought anything different.

“But—.” Dean shakes his head firmly, glancing down at Sam’s soft face and hand gripping at the t-shirt Dean has on, Dean wishes he could stay like this forever. Just them, safe, in Baby, only worrying about each other.

“But that guy was a jerk and you don’t deserve to be talked to like that. Now c’mon we’ll order something and watch cartoons.” A tired but full smile spreads on Sam’s face as they both tumble out of the car, Dean already holding his hand out for his brother and a plan forming in his head for what they can do once this hunt wraps up, they could both use a little tlc in Deans opinion.

[beeflibeef]

I was wondering, who would you think be an ideal partner for Idate? That boy needs a whole lot of love for all the crap he deals with, also I wanted to say I LOVE your art! You definitely inspire me to draw and I really am happy to still see active members in the okegom community!

Thank you for your question, it's very interesting to think about

I never thought about whom Idate would date, in the au especially

I don't know about canon version of him, concerning the version with 'angsty lore' I think the worst match would be someone who resembles his family. Which means that anyone who is not like his family would be a good match. Which ironically means that he shouldn't date anyone who is a lot like himself, or someone who'd remind him about his family ("you're a violent guy, you're bloodthirsty, you're stuck up, you're xenophobic" etc)

please dont take this seriously, my thoughts change a lot and it was my current opinion (as of today)

also I wanted to say I LOVE your art! You definitely inspire me to draw and I really am happy to still see active members in the okegom community!

Thank you very much

Satadate (Satanick x Idate)

In my mind, Idate and Satanick are really good together but I don't personally see them as a romantic pair, i dont know why, maybe it didnt click with me. They can hang out together and have fun, they are also very tolerant and lax with each other. Idate is very patient with Satanick's emotions and sensitiveness, and orca doesn't get upset at his outbursts. And Satanick doesnt mind Idate keeping things to himself. I imagine if they were together, they'd be so lax with each other like a couple where both let their s/o date other people. Satanick's brain is on fire 24/7 and Idate is calmer and more organized (Idate is disorganized and unfocused but it's nowhere near as bad as Satanick's lack of focus). Plus Satanick is really active and very very artistic, he likes various things, so Idate could be introduced to new stuff that Satanick gets into.

9/10, I dont know why i dont ship it, maybe because this looks like BFF dynamic to me

Idarock (Idate and Rock)

Childhood friends is a nice dynamic, I suppose. In my head I liked to headcanon that Idate used to be shyer and less confident and Rock used to be mischievous and active, and Rock's attitude rubbed off on him (I know in canon it was different though). The ship asks are cute and maybe that rubbed off on me and how i see them. Rock being frustrated and annoyed with Idate would feel bad for me personally but I believe Idate is fine with that. As long as Rock just has an attitude and not being actually disgusted with Idate it's a solid match. 9/10

Bonus: them knowing about each other more than others would be an interesting addition to the dynamic between them

Shirodate (Shirogane x Idate)

I wont talk about canon version of this pair-. In non-canon verse, I feel like... it would be a bit awkward, and maybe a slow burn? Shirogane is anxious and tends to assume things about people, plus he is sulky in a way that Idate wouldn't tolerate as much as he'd tolerate Rock's attitude. Idate enjoys being feared but there are times when he's sensitive about it and him being treated with fear would upset him. In a universe where Shirogane tries to protect him i think the ship is cute, but in a verse where Shiro is just fearful of him it'd be bitter between them. 6/10 for the "scared and distrustful shiro x i-hate-being-seen-as-a-monster Idate", and 8/10 for "must-protect-idate Shirogane and can-snap-everyone-in-half Idate"

...i thought about it, and i think, for the soft angst potential, I like them together. Two predator animals, one is terrified of the world, and the other is seen as a terror by the world. There is some melancholic potential here. it's cheesy and overdone but i like thinking about it

Rocmate (Rocma and Idate)

*clears throat* In the universe where Idate has baggage, them together would look awkward to me. Rocma is pretty cold and doesn't show what she feels, and Idate is not the type to spray his energy on others, so they'd just peacefully coexist. They would be a powerful duo who'd rip and tear to save the other, but other than that there would be not much, they'd look like an arranged couple that does their marriage duty but doesn't get lovey and i personally am okay with it, ; 7/10 because I haven't thought enough ideas about this ship tbh, maybe I'll see more in it

I thought more about it , and I think a power duo is good. And Rocma softening toward someone who she'd never think she'd like is endearing. Two scary people growing softer and nicer toward one another is a fine dynamic

Tatsudate (Tatsumiya and Idate)

The pair would be so good and peaceful that I can't say much about it, 9/10. I'm only not sure if it'd work bc i feel Idate wouldn't want to live in the blue sea town, unless Tatsumiya is okay with him travelling around and visiting sometimes. Nagi would be better off with Tatsumiya, but I don't know how to feel about breaking the uncle-niece duo apart.. Darn, I imagined a whole scenario where Idate and Tatsumiya had a whole wedding in a blue sea town near the castle and how pretty it'd look, and I admit the idea of Idate and Tatsumiya being an actual married couple and it being a huge surprise for anyone who learns about it, is fun.

..now I feel bad for Tatsumiya because she'd be a married oarfish who stays at her home and her husband is almost never home. But then again, she values her people above anything else so it's endearing to imagine that Idate respects that

[playroom-sekaii]

you should totally write baby toya hcs… (i say as if we dont talk about him everyday)

-mizu ♡︎♡︎ special signoff for my best friend :)c

Mizu! Mizu Mizu! Your wish is my command!☆

-Goodness he is so tiny, so very tiny, 1-3 age range. The ittiest bittiest little guy, probably the littlest of the prsk kids, goodness don't get me started he is just so small-

-He's not overly embarrassed or ashamed of regressing, it's just a part of him, no reason to beat himself over something he can't control. He does feel a bit bad admitting he's feeling small though, he doesn't want to bother anyone with it or make them mad at him, especially if it's somehow he hasn't been little around before. Thankfully he's surrounded by people who help him feel more comfortable, so he's getting a bit better at telling others if he's regressed.

-Stress is normally what makes him slip, especially things regarding his family. He's also the type to feel little when sleepy, he's practically guaranteed to feel small after a long event with VBS.

-I like to think that the rest of VBS and the Tenma siblings have been working to help Toya experience all of the things he wasn't able to in his childhood, so every so often they'll take him out to do something or buy him something that instantly makes him feel tiny

-Akito and Tsukasa are his main caregivers, he's more comfortable with them than with anyone else. Kohane, An, and Saki take care of him sometimes too, but he's a bit shy with them, clinging to either "Aki" or "Niichan" if they're with him, or his blankie or stuffy. The Virtual Singers act as CGs for him every now and then as well, they make him feel really safe as well ♡

-An absolutely calm and quiet little guy, only speaking in a few words or babbles, it's very rare to find him without his paci and a lovey. Extremely cuddly when compared to his big self, even though he's a bit shy with asking for things he will always be willing to ask for uppies from Tsukasa or Akito!

-Even though he still isn't that emotive, he's a lot more so when he's little, though he's also a bit of a sensitive little guy. The smallest good things will send him beaming and giggling, the littlest bad things could make him tear up, he's a lot more scared of people getting upset with him in this state. However, he's relatively easy to cheer up, just give him cuddles or spend time with him and he'll be a very happy little guy, or reassure him that you'd never get mad at him.

-Still a little bookworm when he's small, sometimes he can read to himself but usually he'll have a CG or playmate do so for him, he's absolutely entranced by the tales they tell. Sometimes he tries to tell stories of his own, and whoever's listening to him will listen to every word (even of most of them are babbles).

-He's a bit nervous about playing, especially with other regressors. He wasn't really allowed to as a kid, what if he does it wrong? (Honey that's not a thing please-) Other little guys always work their hardest to include him in whatever they're doing, Toya's super fun, even if he doesn't realize it himself!

-Those who know about his little side absolutely *spoil* him, anything he wants they'll give him. He only has a very small supply of little stuff hidden under his bed (just a paci, a sippy cup, a little blankie, and a plushie or two from the Tenmas), but they keep a lot at Akito's house or in the Sekai. He's unintentionally very good at puppy-dog eyes, the quietest little "p'ease?" will get him almost anything-

-Unlike his big self, he has a decently big sweet tooth, especially towards cookies. In the very rare chance he misbehaves (it's very uncommon, if it happens another little one put him up to it) offering him a cookie will get him to stop right away.

[altermay]

Tw/ transphobia, discussions of dysphoria, brief mention of suicide, descriptions of child abuse

Getting unbearable. Feeling sick. Started working to afford hormones only to find out the service that is most accessible to me (plume) doesnt offer T in alabama anymore due to changing laws. Fuck all these stupid politicians putting their noses in others lives.

Thought people at work wouldnt make a super huge deal, as I was selective with who I told, so i thought maybe I could hold out a bit longer and at least i wouldnt have to feel so dysphoric all the time, since all my coworkers knew me as Monte. But then instead of my name, people who would usually call anyone else by their name started calling me “Miss” and “maam”

Even the ones I had come out to, and even the ones who told me they were accepting.

Whatever, im from a small rural area, so transphobia is not new to me, what is new to me, however, is being openly trans in an unfamilliar environment. I thought I could start T quickly and maybe people would ever forget that im trans in the first place, but now its been so long.

Some people call me He, and use the right pronouns, but increasingly lately Ive received a myriad of transphobia.

Being called tranny loudly while my coworker kicks my broom as I try to sweep (kicking hard enough for the broom to almost leave my hands and hit another person behind me) , Getting called “it” behind my back. Stuff like this is becoming more common.

The two coworkers who called me it, have been spreading lies about my work performance these past five days, Ive been told my three different people that every time I leave to go do something they start talking badly of me. So I got to my breaking point, at this point it had nothing to do with the pronouns, I was just upset that two forty+ year old adults were purposefully making my job harder to do while I was also struggling with a ton of other stuff (ptsd, seasonal depression, a family members recent suicide) and so I couldnt stop crying.

Despite this situation having nothing to do with me being trans, they are now trying to spread the narrative that Im just being sensitive because they were misgendering me while they were borderline bullying me.

If I was not trans, people would take me seriously on these issues. But now, because I am upset, suddenly Im just a stereotype. A sensitive trans person who is offended because someone used the wrong pronouns a few times.

I will be one to say, I do not give a SHIT about my pronouns. Ive been called the wrong ones my whole life by a majority of people. That was never the issue. But because Im trans, that is the only issue people can perceive for me to have. The ONE issue I had with them regarding my pronouns was them calling me “it” and thats not because its the wrong pronoun, thats because its DEHUMANIZING.

But now I have other coworkers who know NOTHING about the situation saying shit like “well if she claims shes a man maybe she should suck it up” “well if she wants to be seen as a man maybe she shpuld cut her hair”

Fuck you. How about YOU get beaten for 17 years, YOU watch your siblings get beaten near to death for 17 years. YOU have flashbacks of things you dont understand all day every day and we will see how fucking well youre able to “suck it up” you are WEAK. YOU ARE ALL WEAK. And you dont know what its like to be me. My mother tried to kill me. My mother almost killed my sister, I was neglected, never went to a doctor, and I STILL dont know how to take care of myself. And I still havent recovered all of the memories.

Ive had SHORT HAIR ive had LONG HAIR Ive had a MOHAWK, ive had a BUZZCUT ive been BALD. And people STILL fucking saw me as a woman. Im tired of conforming to this bullshit just so people can treat me the same as they always do

Fun fact though, since Ive had long hair Ive been gendered correctly by strangers MORE than I have with ANY OTHER HAIR STYLE.

These stupid fucking transphobes and their stupid fucking stereotypes im so fucking sick of it all. And corporate wont do anything about it, Im sure of this.

Why is it so hard for me to just live my fucking life.

Im so sick of it all

[your-queer-dad]

hey dad,

rant about treatment of trans people ahead, sorry for how long it is.

im really scared of people finding out im trans and treating me differently, not even being transphobic just. being so overly careful with what they say to not make me upset

im stealth, for reference, not in the closet by any means, there are no spaces I allow anyone to treat me as my birth sex, I'm too old to let people step on me for their comfort.

i just know that if they knew they'd start handling me with gloves and catering their words to my gender to not upset me, they'd probably say the usual "oh you pass so well today" and stuff like that which feels extremely fake, the way i know if i pass is if nobody points out anything out of the norm and feels chill enough to call me stupid meme things that dont correlate to my gender because why would i care if im just a chill dude?

i dont want to be perceived as anything other than a dude, not trans, not afab, nothing, just man.

transphobia doesn't bother me, it comes from idiots who know nothing, it rolls off my skin like rain, but overly cautious wording to ensure my feelings don't get hurt really, really messes with my head, because obviously I'm being perceived as weak and in need of extreme catering to so I don't break down.

I don't care if other people need catering to, I think it's perfectly valid and more than happy to do it (I love finding ways to gender things for a trans girl friend of mine who doesn't get to express her gender much, it's fun and makes her really happy!) but I am NOT like that myself and I don't see why people should assume that of me simply because they suddenly found out I'm trans??? I'm not a different person, I'm literally the same guy you spoke with a few seconds ago, why do you think I need different handling now?

honestly... why can't trans people just be seen as individuals like everyone else? obviously some people will be more sensitive, especially if they have few outlets for their gender, but others just don't care.

aren't we whole PEOPLE???

excuse me, this is the only place i could vent anonymously without feeling judged for my experiences, everyone seems to be really loved here.

Hey kiddo! Thank you for reaching out, honestly I get what you mean. Being trans can be really hard sometimes. We're still people, we're no different than anyone else but we're treated differently. Thank you for sharing your feelings, and if you ever need to talk I'm here for you.

- dad x

[aris-ink]

Ari. Honey. Darling. Love.

I am not joking when I say I will rip into any bitch who is mean to you. Your work is fantastic. You are fantastic. Respectfully and disrespectfully people on the internet are too sensitive and need to learn to takes things with a groan of salt.

You are more than allowed to write darker fics. It’s a writing form for a reason. If people out there can’t look at your work and see it as a fictional creation meant to explore a means of creativity then fuck them. They don’t even have to read it. They can just skip over it or block the tags or you even.

Like. I don’t know how other people read fics or watch movies or the shows but the point of them is to pretend for a little while. To have fun with it. People happily watch horror movies and watch murder documentaries or screwed up stuff like that when some of the events are based on real life going ons. But they can’t handle a little (incredibly well written and thought out) story that they DONT EVEN HAVE TO READ IF THEY DONT WANT!!???

I’m dead ass serious. If there are people being mean to you you need to tell me or even just post the ask with a period as a response and let your wonderful followers come at them with bricks and pitchforks. You may not be mean. But I am for the people I care about.

We protect our own in this community.

I am... just... bear with me for a sec... when I want to put somebody on my rec list, I always ask first. people don't usually do that but I really prefer to, because I wouldn't blame somebody if they didn't want to be publically associated with my blog, you know? that just makes you a target as well if someone is awful enough (especially if you're a writer too...), and I don't want anyone to ever get upsetting messages or asks because of me. I even often end up asking if I should go on anon if a mutual's blog is particularly soft, so that they don't get judged for just talking to me.

but every mutual I asked was like, idc lmao I like your writing and if anyone has a problem then too bad 😭 so my point is... you have no idea how much it means to me that you're willing to put yourself forward and... how much it means that you all chose to stand by me. I am never joking when I say to people that I don't want to involve them in my fights, I don't want them to become a target too. you're such a sweet, kind soul, and you don't deserve to deal with rude comments. and it would kill me if you had to just because you stood up for me.

but the fact that you want to and are willing to means more to me than you will ever know. because I don't feel so alone anymore. I don't know how to thank you properly, I don't know how to thank any of my mutuals really, but I do know that I love you all with my entire heart. 🥹❤️ And I love you, so much.

Thank you for being here, thank you for being you <3 and thank you for being my friend. 🥹 Because you're a wonderful one. I love you <3

[lieslab]

i want to request a drabble but im hesitant to ask for it. I want to make a trigger warning for grooming and pedophila. u can say no bc this is a hard topic to write about. i dont wanna upset you. never. but do u think you can make a drabble for a person who is struggling bc they realized theyve been groomed? im having a hard time dealing with it and i think its my fault it happened to begin with preferably a comfort thing with channie plz. can you make the groomer a teacher?i started high school when it started. if not no worries. i thought id ask bc u seem to do well with dark topics

This has been in my inbox for a bit and I keep going back and forth with it because it is such a sensitive topic and I've never experienced anything like this before. I've watched content about it and read about it, but that is entirely different than actually living through it. Quite a bit of the stuff I write about, I've survived and experienced similar situations.

It's not your fault, not at all, darling. Sometimes people are cruel and take advantage of people. It's disgusting and it's gross. I'm so sorry you went through that. No matter how it started, your teacher shouldn't have started something like that to begin with.

I'll try my best because I know there are people out there besides you that this has happened to. I've always wanted to help people and I don't know anyone that's written about this topic. Maybe they have and I'm unaware of it. However, I want to do it justice and write about the darker parts. So please read the trigger warnings when I post it because I don't want to upset you.

I hope you've been able to talk to someone about this because this is an awful thing to go through. Ugh, I can't imagine it. Please know that it's not your fault. No matter what I say, it won't make the hurt go away. I hope you can find some sort of peace soon <3

[honeylikesyanderes]

Hi! I read through everything about your boyos so I’ll have a few asks coming through if that’s ok? I’ll use 🍒 so ya know it’s me (if that’s alright!)

My first is what if we just straight up quit on Krama, like the dream stuff was too weird and we had a bad feeling so we decided to dip.

ALSOOOOO, him not liking a volatile darling when she’s angry 👀👀. What happens if he tries to bring her back and she reacts as such?

(Sorry, I crave angst and I wanna know if you’re willing to indulge me. If not, thank you for the characters and have a lovely rest of your night/day!)

hi anon! welcome to the family 🍒! i'm so glad to have you on board!

and yes i will indulge your angst ;)

(i'll use she/her pronouns bc it was in the ask)

-------------------------------------------------------

honestly, i feel like dipping on karma would be expected

so he'd have plans in place to prevent that

such as threatening your job or your family etc etc

and if darling really doesn't give a fuck and still dips-

karma is not above kidnapping her.

like he'd have her kidnapped in the most sophisticated way

and honestly you'd be gone into thin air.

obviously, missing persons cases would be filed by your family

and your boss too (*cough* karma *cough*)

but its honestly just for show

cause karma will ensure that this becomes one of the many cold cases the world has seen

(if he's feeling a bit dramatic, he might push (read: pay) for a documentary to be made ab your disappearance)

bottom line: there's no escaping.

''i lost you once, and i'm never gonna lose you again love.''

okay back to the kidnapping:

naturally, i dont think anyone would take well to being randomly kidnapped

and tbh, you kinda knew it was karma behind it

so darling was rightfully seething when she was 'delivered' to him

immediately the blindfold is taken off, she's screaming and yelling to the point of tears

you're calling him crazy, delusional, a psycho, every name in the book really

and if there's one thing about karma, he can't stand noise.

after 5 minutes of darling's loud, angry rantings; (and karma's silence)

a loud, commanding ''shut up'' echoes through the room.

and it literally shuts you up lol

''all i wanted to do was take care of you and love you. to take you away from your hard, mediocre and unsatisfactory life. to have your heart. to give you mine. but if you hate me that much and you think my love for you is that disgusting, then you can leave.''

darling is speechless fr

karma's lowkey trying to hold it together but you can kinda see the tears welling up in his eyes

he literally marches to the door and opens it

''leave.''

you're hesitant.

''k-karma...''

then he snaps.

''i said leave. get out of my fucking house (y/n). you can go back to your life and pretend this never happened."

you can see on his face that there's no room for argument-

why would you even want to argue anyway? you're the one who wanted to be left alone.

so you leave and go back to your life

and your 9-5 job at the Elios Group

back to your default y/n lifestyle.

all your clothing that disappeared are dropped off at your doorstep

no more random surprise gifts

no more security hovering behind you in your day to day

no more seeing karma at work

no more love letters

no more random calls, texts, trips-

no more karma.

just silence

and deep down it upsets you.

but what are you so sad for (y/n)?

isnt this what you asked for?

(hi hi!! i hope this was good? i really wanted to capture how sensitive karma can be when it comes to his darling! hope you enjoyed! xx)

[selamat-linting]

living after experiencing sa is so weird like, the same piece of writing about assault could do nothing or it could send me into a week long spiral and its just a matter of dumb luck or pure chance that determines my brains' reaction to it. i've had moments where im legitimately triggered in the middle of re-reading something i actually enjoy as porn. over the years i figured it was because i had small triggers that are abstract or wasnt easily noticeable or doesnt feel like anything until its in the spesific context of sa. like being trapped in an enclosed space with strangers, begging to be sent home, being deceived, having your preferences and interests weaponized against you, the really lonely and painful walk home afterwards where no one comes to save you but maybe its better off this way since you dont want to be seen, those are things im particularly sensitive with. for example, a few years ago i got really messed up about this anecdote of a kid who got kidnapped by a neighbor for a few hours. he offered to see his cat and then lock them up in a room while theyre playing with said kittens. nothing actually happens but that made me legit depressed for a few days. while im fine talking with my friend about an incident where she got followed by a creepy guy who groped her while she's walking home. both situations are horrifying and bad ofc, but i cant exactly communicate or find an easy way to filter out the bad. like, i can handle hearing the graphic details, the bare bones account of what happens, but if it touches on how the victim was tricked or deceived or gets taken advantage of, even when its basically the least upsetting part, i just couldnt do it.

idk, maybe its because my experience was more in the mental stuff. yeah sure, it was only some groping, an almost kiss, and some sex talk. but the context was that i asked for help, someone friendly comes along, they say theyre just helping me but turns out they actually have ulterior motives. i was stuck in a car for hours to god knows where, fully knowing i was gonna get raped when the car eventually stops, trying to plead or at least delay it with someone i thought was a friend without being too harsh because i know they could do even worse things if i drop this thin veneer of friendliness we got going on. and all the while this asshole kept touching me in spots i didnt even realize was a sensitive place for me and i had to keep a straight face the whole time because if they see a hint that i liked it, its over. did i like though? yeah. do i want it? fuck no. never in a million years. and i felt betrayed because im supposed to have that moment of discovery with a boyfriend or a girlfriend and it was supposed to be nice and comforting but its not. and i might associate gentle touches with this forever. and there's also a part of me that said, hey somebody wants me. dont you want to be wanted? i might as well enjoy it because no one's gonna offer me hot car sex like this. i should try to get myself wet! this is a new experience that i should just see the bright side of. im supposed to be a kinky slut right? i just turned 20. and after all, i promised myself, after the first time i had my sa as a kid, the next time it happens im gonna fight. and what am i doing right now? i'm just running my mouth. im laughing at my soon to be rapists' joke and i tell him we should meet up later instead of doing everything right now since i had work later in the day. this isnt fighting, its bargaining. and all the while im wondering if i look pretty while im doing this. i hope i look pretty. im just wearing sweatshirt and pajama pants. this is sick, why do i want to look good while im sexually assaulted?

i never told this to anyone except a friend. but even she didnt get the whole account. she just know it happens. its the part that actually upsets me that i didnt tell her. the whole violated trust thing. and how dumb i am for instantly accepting help from an acquaintance i dont even know that well. and what happens after the car stops. all she knows is that when it stops, i pushed him off of me and i left the car and run.

to her it just seems like im valiantly fighting off an asshole. she didnt know that after i ran, a bunch of men saw me running. they asked me if i need help. they were kind. but i thought of the hassle of reporting to the police, being grilled with questions, have my entire behavior scrutinized, and my parents vacillating between unhelpful anger or chastising me for being so trusting and eventually isolating me because i cant be trusted to exist in a public space without being harassed and god i dont want to miss work today and theyre gonna ask why if i had to miss a day and theyre gonna know too. so obviously i shut up. i couldnt say anything. the fuck who assaulted me came, and get this, i went back to his car. i didnt sit next to him, i was sitting at the backseat, and he was angry and yelled at me the entire time while driving me back to the closest bus station. i didnt say anything, and i actually paid him money before leaving. i was a coward.

in hindsight, what happens after the next few month after that was just me trying to compensate for the shame and utter incompetence i felt. i thought i was good at being confrontational and assertive, but when it actually matters, i cant speak. it was awful. i mean, it was a moment of self improvement, i did evolve from being an awkward self-important debate kid to an adult who relies on being good with persuading people for a living. im proud of that. but the feeling of helplessness still remains. im still afraid that when it happens again, i'd just clam up like usual. even though i already successfully fend off several people trying to fuck with me before anything that bad ever happens because im a hot saleswoman now. it felt weird calling myself a victim or a survivor because, it just happens. i didnt survive shit nor do i want to be a victim. i dont want to be pitied. and i dont want to be called brave or anything because im anything but.

except that everytime something reminds me of my sa incident, i kept having this urge to tell somebody, and i'd wrote a long paragraph detailing everything that happened including all of the uncomfortable details that didnt make me look good as a victim. and then i'd delete it before sending because its not good to tell your personal triggers online right? but i have no one i want to talk about this irl. and i cant imagine any well-meaning response that doesnt make me angry. i kept thinking about it. if anyone acknowledged this happens to me, i have no socially acceptable response. im not sure if anyone could understand or be sympathetic. i mean, imagine someone told you a grave secret about them and then they get angry and throw a tantrum when you say youre keeping their secret to the grave. youre in the right to be angry and confused at them. and its one thing to write a retrospective like this, and its another thing talk about it directly. i wouldnt be self aware to control myself. i'd just ruin another friendship because i got pissed off for no discernable reason.

i dont really know where im going with this. i think i just wanted to get this out of my system. its been what? three years? im sick of keeping that shit in. i think i just need to talk about it, sort of like a confessional before moving on for good. anyway, your usual shitposting will resume shortly. bye bitch!

[satoruarchive]

guys is this a safe space for me to announce how i hate on my friend rn she keeps touching me and i want to LEAVE. LIKE I FEEL LKKE IF IT WAS ANYONE ELSE LIKE TOUCHING MY SHOULDER OR MY BACK OR MY HAIR ETC I WOULD BE FINE W IT BUT THE WAY SHE MAKES IT SEEM SO AWKWARD AND ANNOYING IS JUST LIKE KILLING ME RN to keep this story short so i dont complain my heart out i want her to stop touching me and get away but i feel bad cuz shes really sensitive to anything I SAY LIKE HER MOOD DEPENDS ON MY MOOD LIKE HELLO WHY R U UPSET WHEN IM UPSET

oh so in the span of like the 4 minutes ive been typing this she was like “do u hate me?? ik friends joke around by hating each other but do you hate me” and i was like “oh im joking half the time” idk why i said half the time the inner kraken was coming out but now shes lowk pissy mad HELPME LIKE I FEEL BAD I SAID THAT BUT I DONT THINK SHE WAS TAKING ME SERIOUSLY SHES NOT TOO UPSET IDONT KNOW SHES FINE I THJNK ill.. Potentially update…..!!!!! if she msgs me in class after this being like ha octopus do u hate me and im gonna be like Yes. (Joke….. i will say i love her…!!!!)

but honestly guys eye dee kay how to address this to her bc before hand she was making it a really serious ab being like “so for most of my friends i usually slap their ass and stuff and touch them a lot is it ok if i do that to u????” and she kept asking and asking and asking so at some point iwas jsut like Yeah okay sure BC I WAS SO FED UP W HER TAKING IT SO SERIOUSLY LIKE LISTEN IF U WANNA DO IT JUST DO IT IM THE TYPE OF PERSON WHO GENERALLY DOESNT CARE WHAT HAPPENS but iddint realize she would like. Make it. This. Awkward. like when she “slaps” my bum she goes like tap, tap, tap, tap tap, tap… slap. tap tap tap like she genuinely does it in lowercase which makes me tweak out

Anyways i would also like to clarify i do not hate physical touch i think its genuinely just her that makes it feel like im being violated HELPME but i swear i dont hate her……..

- 🐙

WHATTT if you’re uncomfortable with her touching you you need to tell her pookie.. sensitive or not she should understand ur not okay with it bc that is no excuse to be touching you when you dont want her to!! TRY TO SAY IT NICELY LOL??? like.. im not really liking the way ur touching me rn!

stop i get super scared when people ask that like no.. ily!! HELP?? if you didn’t mean it just be like i don’t hate u that was the demons gang 😗😗

oh.. oh.. thats not.. GET BEHIND ME OCTOPUS ANON??? sorry but im so weirded out rn??? cool that her other friends are fine with it but if you don’t like it you need to stand uppp 🤕🤕

feeling violated around a friend esp if ur fine with physical touch is not overreacting or normal so i’d say you genuienly just tell her you don’t like the way she’s touching you

SENDING MY PRAYERS TO YOU NONNIE (sorry if i got too serious but fr u need to set ur boundaries🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️)

[thoughts-and-all-that]

how the fuck do you block someone without blocking someone... someone who makes me deeply DEEPLY uncomfortable either follows my main (i checked after posting this, they do follow my main) or at least checks in on it enough that they liked one of my posts, but the thing is... we are in a very small fandom together, and ive talked to them on discord before, and i am trying so hard to be liked by this fandom despite how much it kinda grates on my nerves, and i really dont want them being like. hey why do you have me blocked. and like. starting drama about it

i guess i doubt theyd start drama but i really dont know them well and i. constantly feel like im walking on egg shells with these people cause theyre the types that are like. more sensitive than me. which sure thats not like inherently bad or negative but it gets. irritating when it feels like i have no idea what i can and cant say that might upset them or get me in trouble. like i cant even joke about cults and cannibalism with these people. like come on, its funny to make these shitty things out to be a joke, it makes it feel like they suck less. i mean, im not making light of them, when it comes to real situations of them im obviously not gonna treat it like a joke, but when it comes to the vague idea of them? yeah its funny. theyre just absurd concepts. i mean, come on man.

like, okay fine, its fine that they dont want to joke about it, but you cant even MENTION that stuff around these people. i mean i guess like. i guess its one of these peoples triggers but. what the hell situation do you find yourself in where cannibalism is brought up and becomes a trigger. like obviously i cant ask them that but like. WHAT. like did your mother eat your brother or some shit like... what the hell situation gives you cannibalism as a trigger. the cult one is fully understandable cause cults are common but you dont hear or see real life cannibalism every day. like does this person just have a horrible backstory or something.

i got very off track. i mean i guess it doesnt matter this is literally just a vent blog

its not like i hate any of these people. i may dislike one or two of them, thats just bound to happen with any group of people, but not hate. but as much as i dont want to say it, theyre not exactly my vibe. i mean... i always stuck out like a sore thumb in this fandom, even back in the day, hell, ESPECIALLY back in the day. i stumbled upon a fandom made by and for homeschooled christian kids and that sure was exactly how it sounds! and i... very much was not that. i was a public school atheist kid and i just simply found the content funny and the characters fascinating. i fell HARD for the characters, they... in more ways than one, lived rent free in my head.

a lot happened, i wanted nothing to do with it after, and then eventually i wanted something to do with it again. but ive been cautious this time. maybe a little too much i dont know. i just cant let it happen again. i know it cant happen again logically, and yet the creeping tendrils it left parasitically suckling on my skin creeps ever upward, threatening my very core.

i swear fandoms have changed drastically since 2016. i dont know what it was. i couldnt tell you if you paid me. they didnt used to be like this, filled with the one thing that makes me question my determination to go on. the one thing i cant even talk to anyone about because it makes me feel like im going to die, and other people treat me like ill die for it.

and its everywhere. its all over and i cant escape it and i try so desperately to.

and you know that its in this fandom. it was the first fandom i saw it in, actually. its the reason i feel this way at all. they haunt me. my every action is tinted with this haunting, it changed me for the worse.

i cant get close to any of them because almost all of them say it. and the ones who dont... definitely arent my vibe. the ones who dont arent even the ones i dislike, surprisingly. i used to hate one of them, hell, i used to hate one of the other people too. but things change. people change.

i guess i cant, since its been 7 years and this shit still haunts me so bad.

the reason that person makes me so uncomfortable is that thing. the one and i think only call i did in that server (i probably did one other) was with them and someone else, because i was like. why not! it was soon after i joined and i wanted to befriend the current era of this fandom. huge mistake. confronted with them doing the one thing that curses me. i left silently because they were all ignoring me anyway. what an experience.

ive had so many feelings since i joined that server, thats for sure. my relationship with this fandom could fill a novel. i hope it never does. it wouldnt get published anyway.

i just love these characters. i used to love one of the other people in the fandom. thats its own story. i cant even keep a conversation with them nowadays. how can i? the thing we had in common is gone. i cant tell them the truth. i REALLY cant tell them the truth. they would hate me. i cant handle them hating me. we arent codependently attached anymore but that doesnt mean i dont still care way too much about them. they were the best relationship i ever had, and we didnt even date.

i dont know what i would do if they hated me.

i just really love these dumbass characters. i dont know what it is. their own creators treated these characters a bit like crap. but these characters are so real to me. but not in THAT way.

and sadly ive tried to stop caring, but it didnt work. i mean... i did also want to reclaim them. that situation doesnt deserve to hold them hostage. i guess i could use to have that mindset about a lot more about that situation, but its not that easy. its really, really not that easy.

and because i care so much about these fucking characters, i care about having a decent relationship with the fandom. theres only so many of us, and none of these people are bad, i just... dont fit in. i never really did. but i try to. i dont think my effort does much.

i worry that they think im too much. i treat darker and mature topics like casual jokes, i dont share so many of the same ideas as everyone else, i make a lot of things about me because i dont know how not to. i try to keep up conversations by relating, but i fear it comes off as me trying to pivot it to be about me.

i think some of the stuff they do is silly, not that id ever stop them

i miss the early days, before the other shoe dropped. when i actually did fit. when it was so easy. when me and my friends filled up discord chats with back-and-forth prompts and ideas and writing... how i always wanted any fandom to be for me. why did it ever have to change. why did they have to tell me the truth. i was only 14.

i actually did almost have it with another fandom, too. that didnt work out as well after a little while. it was nice while it lasted.

i cant do that with these people. i wish i could. i wish i didnt feel like oil trying to mix with water.

so, anyway. cant block this person. wish i could. i wont though.

this is just the surface of all of this, you know. like i said, it could be a whole novel.

i have to live with this.

[forestryfae]

"can people please be quiet with teh doors" "yeah you can have attention tomorrow" FUCK OFF. DIE. I CAN SLAM THE DOOR AT FUCKING EIGHT PM IF I WANT TO, FUCK OFF WITH THE TALKING TO EVERYONE THROUGH SNAPCHAT CUS YOU HAVE A PROBELM WITH ONE PERSON AND THE SECOND CUNT. man i am SO glad he sSO much better and more mature than everyone else, he totally is so much better than me for not slamming doors and he has SUCH a good handle on his emotions that when hes mad or annoyed or cranky he doesnt just straight up insult people or get bitchy or bite at them or act like a complete cunt, he totally didnt completely stop talking to a friend just cus she didnt liek him romantically, he totally doesnts it in the livingroom being crankya nd sulky and bitchy all fucking day so its uncomfortable for everyone else to sit in there.

not that anyone has any issue with it when this third guy slams the front door and slams the chair when he moves it and all that shit without being fucking angry or upset, he does it just for fun. noone complains when he and this girl literally ran like fucign idiots up the stairs and made a huge fucking racket at nearly 11. the same guy who slams the doors for fun fucking played music at full volume WITH bass for months and noone complained cus hes "sensitive". i can hear someones fucking music right now and its not that looud but its still fucking annoying, and it usually lasts until WAY past 11

but if i get angry its "attention whore" and "dont slam doors" and i dont see ANYONE and if im still angry when they come to talk to me noone wants to be around me. fuck me, im not allowed to be angry ever and when i am and its fucking righteous and fair and welldeserved im still a bitch and i need to widen my tolerance window. FUCK that

and somehow im supposed to make friends and be a productive member of society and live on my own independently?? how the fuck am i suppose dto do that when im not allowed to do shit. i cant try to be social, i cant be sad or upset, i cant be happy or someone will do their best to ruin that, i cant be angry, i cant even be fucking hungry or tired, theres noever any excuse that is good enough and its all my fault because i dont take responsibility, and no matter what im always fucking annoying everyone. noone is ever on my team either cus it entierly depends on whether or not they agree or disagree with me, whether theyre annoyed at me or not, and whether its a neccessity that isnt fulfilled that im not worth enough to be allowed to have. everything is my fault, im not given any grace that is given to anyone else because i dont fucking deserve it, i am awarded nothing for being capable of doing things that are hard for me no matter what because i dont fucking deserve it for doing the bare minimum, i dont deserve to be helped and im not good enough to get help no matter what i do, im inherently THE worst person in the world and no matter how little i care about myself and how little i feel just to make other people comfortable its never going to be enough

youd think not hitting people or breaking stuff and only slamming doors even though youre fuckign furious and could scream and bite people was on some level actually a good thing. and yet here i am being told im an attention whore for slamming a door and hiding in my room and crying as quietly as i can so noone can fucking hear me. cus im not fucking allowed to be upset and removing myself from a situation that fucking infuriates me and makes me want to scream. ud think removing myslef so i dont scream at people cus people dont like that would be a good thing but no. thats also fucking bad. not that anyone fucking cares either, staff doesnt come check on me. staff doesnt care. my parents dont care. friends dont give a shit. noones gonna come comfort me or actually help with the underlying issue or the constant repeating pattern of bullshit. nah fuck that its my fault for being angry at bullshit to begin with. im an asshole for this, noone else is at blame for being shit at communication or treating me like shit, and i just need to stop having any emotions that annoy other people. god fuck off and eat shit. what the fuck.

[doebt]

i am like the bare minimum of a decent person as far as morals and kindness goes but its kind of a miracle that im not like. super... mean