#but i dont like feeling like that ALL OF THE TIME... is the problem

[vonbabbitt]

My Final Statement on Discord Drama (Why I'm Not a Mean & Evil For Turning Away Discord Asks)

hello jason. we are going to discuss this one final time and then never again.

from now on, i will be giving zero attention whatsoever to discord drama asks. i will not be posting about them or replying to them in any way. since people are sending me asks now acknowledging that they arent supposed to be sending me discord drama asks but are doing it anyway, i want to make a statement on this explaining myself so people dont just think im being mean and avoiding responsibility for moderating my discord server. please hear me out on my reasoning.

this is my personal blog! this is the first thing i always say when this comes up so lets keep it that way! this is my personal blog, regardless of how much tetro content i engage with here. when im on my personal blog enjoying personal time, i dont want to be dealing with work. you can call that me avoiding responsibility, but i dont think its unreasonable to want time to myself outside of work where i dont have to deal with the tetro discord server. this is exactly why we have a ticket system!

we have a ticket system! the server has a ticket system. this is THE ONLY PLACE to report discord server drama, because this is the only place the whole moderation team can access your complaint! there is no reason that i specifically have to be the one to review your complaint and not a different moderator. we have a moderation team for a reason. you do not know me, i do not know you, and there is no reason you need to bring your complaint to me PERSONALLY. if you think there is, and theres a specific reason it needs to be ME who answers your complaint, there is a solution: ask for me specifically when you open your ticket!

if you go outside of the ticket system, we cannot discuss anything with you. im not having a conversation about moderation on my public blog where everyone can see it, especially if youre naming specific people in your complaint. its unprofessional and invasive. if you go through the ticket system, we can talk! i can let you know what came of your complaint and what we're doing as a team to help. the ask i got this morning was complaining about an issue that has already been discussed with the parties involved, which they would know if they had gone through the ticket system instead of my ask box.

i encourage you to try just communicating with each other. ive received so many complaints in my ask box from people who i know for a fact have made no attempt to discuss their issue with the parties involved. i know im a kindergarten teacher, but we are not toddlers! in fact, even in my kindergarten class, when my kids come up to me and tell me another kid is doing something they dont like, i tell them to tell the other kid they dont like it! and this is the same advice i will give to you! talk your issue out with the parties involved! "but von babbitt, im afraid of confrontation." im sorry to hear that, but im not such a fan of confrontation myself! this is why ive got a moderation team and a ticket system! and when i have to do my job, i do it anyway. with all due bluntness: i think its inconsiderate and irresponsible to come running to my personal ask box and demand i fight your battles for you without making any attempt to do anything on your own, including any attempt to use the server ticket system, which we have set up for the exact purpose of solving your problems for you.

im allowed to just say no! the main issue is the fact that ive already asked people to stop and theyre still doing it anyway. i said no, and that means stop. its a very very very very simple ask. stop sending me discord drama asks. ive asked you to stop. if you know it makes me upset, and you choose to do it anyway while acknowledging it makes me upset, why would i want to help you??? why would i feel inclined to break server rules and go out of my way for you??? youre being purposefully rude and inconsiderate towards me.

i hope this helps to clarify my stance a bit. im sorry if this comes off as harsh but im really really sick of this and id really like it to stop. ive put every measure in place to allow people to easily report things without coming to my personal blog. thank you for giving me the time of day and i hope this is at least something people will keep in mind

[panlight]

speaking of Bella centric, I personally never understood the justification when defending the writing in BD that the reason the Cullen's seem so chill now with their existence is because Bella being so happy and all "I was born to be a vampire wheee!! :D" is what made them rethink their view on their lives or whatever. ESPECIALLY with Edward and Rosalie. Especially x2 with Rosalie.

It's just doesnt make sense when i look at it outside the Bella bubble. Carlisle kinda made do with himself long time ago, and so did Esme. Emmett is pretty much fine with it. Jasper and Alice are the most "vampire" among them, so they dont really feel bad about missing their humanity and whatnot. To say that it took Bella being high off her overwhelming ecstasy in this new life or whatever she said in one of the chapters (i might be misremembering LOL) to get everyone to be all "see, being a vampire isn't so bad!" screams Main Character Energy.

and it doesn't really resolve Edward's issues with them being soulless? Like if you REALLY want to make a reach and say that he saw that Bella was happy being a vampire to convince him, he has family members who he's known for longer have fun despite their vampirism (see: Emmet). And even on a moral issue, which he's looking at it from, it's as if his concern for Rutabaga and her preference for human blood and having a vampiric diet and lifestyle is now a nonissue SOMEHOW??

As for Rosalie, wasnt one of her main issues not being able to have babies, not being able to see them grow and having grandkids? imo I call bullshit that she's fine with just being aunt to Bella and Edwards kid. it's still not her own kid, said "kid" is growing too fast so she's not able to have a proper mother experience with her anyway. also does smeyer expect me to believe that Rosalie is just happy now settling for crumbs from the brother she butts heads with the most and his girlfriend who was so dismissive of her pain of having no kids? please... 🙄

OMG, yes, this.

The idea that people who have lived as vampires for decades and even CENTURIES in some cases, should instantly reevaluate their feelings about it because one (1) girl who has been a vampire for literally 3.5 months is having a Good Time will never make sense to me.

Of course she's happy??? She knew what she was getting into, she wakes up in a mansion with the man she loves and his supportive family, she gets to keep Jacob and Charlie, she has a daughter and cool cars and nice clothes and a fairytale cottage. She also hasn't been a vampire long enough to experience the ennui of watching the world grow and change while you stay stagnant, she hasn't watched everyone form her youth grow old and die yet.

No one else had anything CLOSE to that experience. PLUS they all HAVE lived long enough to experience being "frozen, never moving forward." Carlisle can go visit London if he wants, but it's not the London he knew anymore.

And yeah, the souls thing is totally unresolved. I mean I think the idea is supposed to be that Edward now thinks he has a soul because how could a soulless monster have created anything so wonderful as Renesmee? And like, I guess. But Esme's open, loving heart wasn't enough to convince him vampires might still have souls? Carlisle's centuries of working as a doctor wasn't enough? This blood-drinking baby is? Renesmee herself kills things and drinks blood and prefers human blood and will age only for 7 years until she, too, becomes "frozen, never moving forward" and no one has a problem with that? Edward and Rosalie are cool with that? Carlisle, who still wonders if turning the others--who were all dying--was the right thing to do or was dooming them, isn't bothered that Nessie is basically 'doomed' from birth? It really does feel like that since Bella is like "phew! I'll get to have her forever!" about it, everyone else has to feel that way, too. By all means love the kid and be happy she's not going to age up to an old woman in 15 years and die, but you can still be concerned about her quality of life.

re: Rosalie, I agree, I don't believe she's going to be content being aunt to this kid, who isn't even really a kid. She skips all the baby milestones and basically doesn't even have much of a childhood. She just taught herself to talk and read and walk and dance all within 2 months. And Rosalie's thing wasn't "I like babies" it was "I want to be a MOTHER." Those are two different things. Bella continually asserts her place as the Mother, Renesmee recognizes her as the Mother, wanting her upon their first meeting even though other people (like Rose) had been caring for her for two days. Rosalie gets to brush her hair and feed her human blood from a bottle and I just don't think that's going to lead to lasting happiness.

I mean if Bella's still blissfully happy in 50 years THEN the Cullens can reasonably take a hard look at themselves and their views of vampirism but she's literally in the honeymoon stage now and her experience was basically as ideal as possible. She picked up her life where she left off; everyone else had to start over.

[jaggedamethyst]

circuit breaker 🔬🌌 (part seven)

tutor!jayce talis x reader, ekko x reader college au

content: its the day after the kiss and you're not sure how to act...neither does jayce it seems.

notes: i dont think there's any warnings for this, but its a short one so we can get to the juicy stuff soon. i have a plan to combine some chapters so we can get the tea but this one had to end this way...you'll see.

series master list

。·:*:·ﾟ★,。·:*:·ﾟ☆　　 。·:*:·ﾟ★,。·:*:·ﾟ☆

Jayce sat stone-faced, examining the hospital band. The letters seemed foreign to him, displaying the name backward. He repeated the words in his mind—Talis comma Ximena. The text wasn’t new to him, but the sting felt fresh every time.

He felt the fabric of the bed sheets pull at him, shifting under his mom’s movement. 

“Jayce?”

“Hey, mom.”

She gripped his hand, albeit weakly, but the love was always there. “I missed you around here this week.” 

“I know,” he squeezed her hand in response. “I’ve been busy… but I’m glad to see you’re okay.” 

“I’m always okay when my beautiful son is here.” 

He smiled at that, blushing at the endearing and inherent motherly tone. Most of Jayce’s visits went like this—Ximena humoring him, and Jayce appreciating that she still had that life to her. It was often that people would get sick, lose their humanity. Not his mom; she was a fighter. 

“Love you, mom.” 

“I love you, too, Jayce.” 

—

“Do you want to explain what last night was about?” 

You were lost in thought, slowly walking on the path toward the student center. Feeling a hand on you should’ve induced fear but it was familiar, firm with a pinch you’d felt before. 

“Hello to you, too, Viktor.” 

“First you do…whatever it is that had Jayce so frazzled. Then,” Viktor pulled you toward him, ushering you to stop. “Then you skip class today. Is there something I should know about?” 

You stopped with him but avoided his gaze on you. “Nothing of note, no.” 

He smirked a bit, relinquishing the parental tone. “Is that so?” 

You smirked back, matching his more mirthful energy, “Mhm, nothing happened.” 

The sound of his cane tapping on the ground alerted you to walk again, resuming your path to your tutoring session. Truthfully, you tried to put it off. Skipping class, walking slow—all efforts to not see Jayce. You couldn’t handle it, not yet. 

“I know you two kissed.” 

“What?” You shook your head quickly, feigning shock, “We didn’t kiss! It was completely PG, we talked about the quiz, that’s it.” 

You paused, looking both ways before crossing at the stop sign. Viktor arched his brow, looking over to you with a knowing eye. 

“Your lips,” he pointed to his own in a circular motion, “Your lip balm was smeared.” 

A sharp inhale escaped you. Immediately, thoughts of Ekko flashed in your mind—his sudden change in demeanor. 

“Gosh, I,” you fumbled on your words. “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.” 

“It’s okay to not know. That’s the beauty of seeking knowledge, is it not?” 

“I guess so, but isn’t this different? This isn’t like learning some random equation-“

Viktor tilted his head, “I’d like to think that our relationships are like equations—yes—adding and taking away various things until we get an answer.” He continued after a pause, “The beauty is that unlike math, we actually have a say in what those outcomes are. Does that make sense?” 

“I know you’re a genius, but you don’t have to also make insanely good analogies.” 

Viktor shrugged—conveying a nonchalance that you knew was unlike him. He was similar to you in that way; he cared a lot about everything—everyone. You’d often reasoned that’s why you could be friends with him—his quiet passion. 

“Besides good figures of speech…I also find it imperative that you face your problems head on.” 

The student center came into view with a simultaneous wave of deja vu. Somehow you ended up in the same situation as before—reluctantly stepping into the building with a brilliant man by your side. This time, though, the fear wasn’t of asking for help. Now, you were reasonably worried about seeing Jayce after last night. 

Viktor wasn’t one to drag things out, so he left after giving you an encouraging smile. You swiftly made your way to the back, slightly happy at the thought of having a second to yourself. Jayce never got here before you. 

Of course he decided to change that habit today of all days. 

You tried not to pause so noticeably at the sight of him in the office, but you couldn’t help it. As if he felt you there, he turned his head to you. 

He quickly moved to open the door—same as always. “Hi.”

Your reply came out much weaker than you intended, startling yourself. “Hi.” 

Avoiding eye contact felt weird. You often did so in an attempt to seem focused on the material—and it would work surprisingly well. Today, though, meeting your eyes with Jayce’s felt exponentially harder.

Jayce spoke up, “We should talk about yesterday.” 

You moved to sit down, “Yeah, I-“ 

“You should be proud of yourself, you got a good grade.” 

Your eyes narrowed; you didn’t expect to gloss over what actually happened so easily. If he wanted to be this way, you could play along—preferred it even. 

“I am,” You nodded. It was curt, a finality lingering on it. 

A hand found the back of his neck, rubbing his own hair. He didn’t speak but opened the folder that was on the table. “Here’s more reference sheets that will be useful in the next few weeks.” 

He didn’t let you comment, spinning to the whiteboard that stood in front of you. His mind worked at the speed of light—jotting down everything he’d cover today and some examples that would help you later. It didn’t matter. You weren’t focused. The facade you’d put up to match his indifference was rooted in anything but. 

You cared. A lot. This hurts.

The hour passed with an insane drag. In what was usually an educational meeting, you found yourself half-engaged. To every question you’d offer a simple nod, murmur, or slight lip curl—nothing of significance. 

You would allow your eyes to trail over his back and up his neck—remembering the feel of him. A sip of your water, a tingle not nearly as exciting as the feel of his lips on yours. You’d even become painfully aware of the breeze from a vent in the room, and it reminded you of his breath softly swirling around you. 

None of it mattered, though, because he didn’t seem to care. 

At the exact moment your session was up, you slammed everything shut.

“Hey, don't worry.” Jayce stopped you, “You’ll be ready. I’m sure of it.” 

He was being honest, he always was. With the midterm coming up, there wasn’t time to waste���he knew that. The reassurance felt amazing, yet wasn’t what you wanted. His eyes crinkled at your lack of response, clearly stunned by your change in attitude today. You could only scoff at him and his deliberate attempt to disregard your feelings. 

You wanted to believe he was different.

“I’ll see you later, Jayce.” 

He scrambled, stumbling over his own feet, “Wait-“

Mel standing in the lobby made him stop, his words no longer finding him. You stood, looking between his confused face and Mel’s saddened one. He ignored you, ignored what he was about to say…for her. 

“Mel, what’s wrong?” 

Troubling thoughts swirled in your mind, mostly about whether something so juvenile as a kiss would compromise your sessions with Jayce. On the other hand, you considered Mel. You knew so little about her, about them. Part of you felt shame, hated that you weren’t sure what exactly their connection was. 

You refused to be that person—to enable a cheater, by accident or not. With a quick pivot in your feet you left, without a word to Jayce or a look back at him. 

Stepping outside felt like a whirlwind, even more so when you did a double take. A flash of a familiar blue shade hit your peripheral, still yet much more faded than the last time you saw it. You paused, slowly turning your head and letting the tension build in your eyebrows. 

The commotion of the world seemed to become louder, drowning out your whispers to the figure a few feet away from you. 

“Powder?” 

taglist

@juskonutoh @sseleniaa @aerina127 @sleepysoldier @angelicmisty @1800latenitecreep @venus-in-roses @myxticmoon @rando-no-5

[missdrarrydawn]

ngl im autistic as fuck and i dont know if someone wants me to do something unless they explicitly ask me to do it

i keep seeing posts like this and marveling at what people even mean by this (i assume neurotypical people)

like, to my autistic perspective, it seems like you're expecting someone to be a mind-reader and understand what chore you want to be done

and that feels unreasonable? but the autism probably makes it impossible for me to understand what the point of this behavior is

especially cuz ive had situations where, because i have severe anxiety about this specific issue in my contact with neurotypical people who got really angry at me that i hadn't read their mind and done X thing they wanted me to do and called me selfish and self-centered for not performing that expectation, even though i genuinely didn't even know they wanted me to do anything to begin with because they didn't say anything, i tried to overcompensate for the problem by picking up random shit to do myself that seemed like it would be helpful, and i thought it would make the neurotypical happy—

—only to be told in the end i did it wrong and messed up worse and that if i didnt know how to do it right i shouldve just left it instead of creating more work for everyone

and it just gave me anxiety on doing thing myself cuz what if i do something wrong they'll be mad at me but also at the same time anxiety of if i dont do something at all theyll be mad at me anyways

its a death loop

can someone neurotypical define in very literal, very much talking-to-a-5-year-old terms, what you mean by 'do things without needing to be asked' and how an autistic person that doesn't understand what people want/expect unless they tell me can recognize that someone wants/expects something so i can masquerade the part of being normal more effectively so people like me?

[serotonin-dose]

Just watched a video analysis and explanation for the game Mouthwashing

I truly wish I liked interacting with horror more outside of having it shown to me through someone else or experiencing it secondhand, because it definitely seemed like it earned its reputation.

[lizardbrainlabs]

Your interpretation of Hector talking with Bauhauzzo post-game (if you can see that happening) would be neat!!

oh the horrors of knowing no one can fix the problem except for you

[anyataylorjoys]

seeing so many fellow creators' gifsets getting under 180 notes with an average reblog to like ratio of 1:3 is so disheartening. less and less people are putting out content cause it seems that no one cares anymore.

If you truly care about supporting creators at all, I encourage everyone to have a tracked tag in this economy whether you make content or not, you probably have mutuals who would love to share things with you and can't.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

can i just say. i find it a bit odd that people, even people who dont dislike teruhashi, want her to not end up with saiki because "itd teach her not everyone will love her"

like... half the point of her character is that... NOBODY loves her. nobody knows her and sees her and genuinely likes her, they just like the crafted self she projects outwardly... except for saiki. saiki is the only person who actually likes TERUHASHI, and you guys dont want that??

this scene is literally her realizing "these guys didnt even notice or care about my exhaustion and only cared about me continuing to make them feel good about themselves even after i passed out, but SAIKI noticed and cared"

[nabaath-areng]

I have way too many alts that I keep to myself (which is why I generally refrain from posting them), but I'm going to ignore that habit for a moment just because I'm feeling particularly insane about this guy.

[angelpuns]

pov i did in fact get a (v cheap) cane to see if it helped any but I'm??? apprehensive about using it or telling anyone about it cause im?? Idk if it will improve my life but it's a temporary solution until I can go to the doctor. Anyway this is just me telling someone( the internet) about it cause it frankly should not be this big of a deal. It just is cause that's the type of person I am. I mean- my friends can attest to me not being able to stand or walk for long periods of time, I just don't want them to??? i don't wanna say judge me, but maybe think I am being dramatic?? It really is temporary to see if it helps so. Idk. I know they probably wouldn't but man im just.ragh. I also was under the assumption that canes are just for support when walking but apparently nthey are also helpful if you have trouble standing. good to know cause that's where most of my issues lie. walking sucks too but I can usually deal cause im too focused on other things such as 'dont get hit by car' and 'dont let knees get too straight'

ALSO SIDE NOTE I WILL BE GOING TO A DOCTOR SOMETIME AFTER JANUARY IM JUST LITERALLY TOO BUSY AND POOR RN TO DO SO

[kelocitta]

There is currently a rather large discussion ongoing about the RW fandom behavior, drama, etc. I am not going to talk about the specifics of whats happened for a number of reasons. But what I do want to say is that if at any point you've harassed people over it, whether that be through anon asks or public posts- you did nothing but damage the ability for people to correctly process what is happening. You contributed nothing but harm to an already delicate situation. It does not matter what "side" you were on and I will not tolerate further interaction with me or my work if I found out you did such. If you let your personal hate for anyone boil over into threats, wishes for long term harm and petty comments meant to contribute nothing but slander or mental distress for the individuals involved who were already distressed (or acting irrationally) you did nothing but make it harder for people to process their emotions, thoughts and behaviors constructively. Regardless of who you think was in the right, who fucked up, whatever. It doesn't matter if they deserved it, or earned it, or if its an eye for an eye. Its difficult enough as it is to think clearly when presented with any kind of stressful situation and heckling people does nothing but make it worse and harder for them to explain themself in any capacity. I don't want you anywhere near me if you think that is an acceptable way to act.

[epiphainie]

i can't with all these "the show is highlighting tommy's jealousy, they're planting seeds that it will cause problems" takes like bffr. he mentioned being envious over the 118's dynamic twice, sure, but in what world (literally how?) would that cause a relationship problem? do yall expect him to be in cahoots with gerrard behind their back and murder buck to take over his life or something?? like even with the hyperbole aside, i genuinely cannot see how they can turn this into relationship drama without going against everything they showed us with tommy so far

[halfdeadwallfly]

[minrathous]

it's so frustrating they don't take the necropolis as an opportunity to explore spirits with more depth in veilguard. or even Manfred's whole thing. Manfred being able to learn to speak implies that any wisp is capable of it with time. they have preferences and emotions and comprehend speech but you still shouldn't be concerned that they are used for slave labour in the necropolis. you're supposed to be horrified that Hezenkoss is abusing spirits but not at that. engaging with spirits as people introduces too much nuance to the situation and veilguard is absolutely incapable of dealing with it. otherwise they'd have to engage with why Solas wants to tear the veil down

[tacagen]

one of the things that fascinate me about thawne: yes, he CAN be normal with kids! surprisingly normal!

((not at all times, though. his mental illness still spills through and as usual he, in trying to manipulate or hurt others, spits out at them the exact stuff that would hurt him (or have in his childhood/barry's rejection interpretation) the most in the first place lmao))

but at the same time. his like second instinct when doing his bullshit is FUCK THEM (as) KIDS

(and, well. whatever this classifies as)

[theposhperyton]

All evidence suggests yes