#but i don't want it. don't wanna think about it. crying as i write this. don't wanna face the music. hate how it hinges on that. are all
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AN ANGSTY ASS REQUEST, I wanna cry and I know you are gonna do amazing. Love your writing. Kind of backstory: So.....Reader is the love of Rafe’s life and the only person who has shown him kindness and given him affection. They are kidnapped for some reason, perhaps kept on a boat, and she falls overboard. Rafe escapes. A BODY (not hers, but can’t be certain) gets washed up at some point and she is determined to be dead. So just kind of as back story....you don't need to write that part if you don't want to <3 So present/and well....the request really: Funeral is held and everything. He is walking around for about 2 months, mourning her, being an ABSOLUTE WRECK. He has nightmares constantly about her and when he’s awake, she haunts him still. He is drinking all the time because he can’t cope. UNKNOWN……she survived but was still held captive. She manages to escape and breaks into his house. HE THINKS HE IS OUT OF HIS MIND, DRUNK but it’s such a teary felt reunion when he realizes that she’s real. Maybe he gives her a bath (cus lets be real) and takes care of her (and again, let's be real, she is probably really weak) and is just shaking with relief, happiness and is so soft with her :(
wow, this is such an amazing request, i absolutely love this!!
the salty air was sharp and cold, biting against your skin as the boat rocked beneath your feet. it wasn’t the gentle sway of a calm ocean—it was erratic, violent, as if the sea itself mirrored the chaos that had unfolded in the past few hours.
rafe’s face was bloodied, his lip split and bruises already blooming along his jaw. his wrists were bound behind his back, the ropes digging into his skin as he struggled against them. he was glaring at the men surrounding him, his usual cocky bravado barely masking the sheer terror in his eyes.
“look,” rafe growled, his voice low and dangerous, though it cracked with desperation, “you’ve got me. i’ll get you your money. just let her go. she doesn’t have anything to do with this.”
one of the men, a grizzled figure with a jagged scar running down his cheek, barked out a laugh. “you don’t get it, do you? you think you can screw us over and just walk away? nah.
“you’re gonna feel what it’s like to lose everything.”
the words sent a shiver down your spine. you’d known rafe’s life wasn’t clean—he carried the weight of bad decisions and even worse company—but you never thought it would come to this. the fear in his eyes, barely veiled beneath his fury, was enough to make your heart clench.
“please,” you interjected, your voice trembling as you stepped closer. “please, just let us go. we won’t—”
the sharp crack of a slap silenced you, the force of it sending you stumbling back. rafe surged forward, his shout of rage muffled by the gag they shoved into his mouth.
“enough talking,” the scarred man said coldly. “you want to play the hero, cameron? let’s see how much you care about her.”
before you could react, multiple strong hands grabbed your arms. you thrashed against them, your heart pounding as you looked back at rafe. his eyes were wild, his muffled cries growing frantic as the men dragged you toward the edge of the boat.
“no!” you screamed, your voice raw as the dark water loomed closer. the waves were fierce, crashing against the sides of the vessel, the moonlight glinting off their surface like shards of broken glass.
“rafe!” you cried, your voice breaking.
he was struggling so hard now that blood began to seep from where the ropes cut into his wrists. his muffled shouts were desperate, pleading.
“throw her over,” the scarred man commanded.
“no! please—” you begged, but it was too late.
the cold hit you like a thousand needles, stealing the air from your lungs as you plunged into the frigid ocean. the world above became muffled, the boat a distant silhouette against the black sky as you were swallowed by the waves. you fought to stay afloat, the current pulling at you like unseen hands.
above, rafe was a man undone. he thrashed violently, his screams muffled and his face twisted in agony. “let me go! i’ll kill you! i’ll kill you!” the men barely paid him any mind as they turned the boat, leaving the spot where you disappeared into the water.
“you better hope she’s a good swimmer, cameron,” the scarred man sneered. “and you’d better figure out how to pay us back.”
the funeral rafe held was a quiet affair, not because you deserved anything less, but because he couldn’t bear the thought of it being a spectacle. the small, secluded chapel was filled with the scent of lilies and a suffocating weight of sorrow. he sat in the front row, shoulders hunched, his trembling hands clutching the edge of the pew.
he couldn’t look at the casket, though it was empty.
the minister’s words were hollow, background noise to the storm raging inside him. “a kind soul, taken too soon…” “beloved by all who knew her…” every word made his chest ache. rafe clenched his fists so tightly that his knuckles turned white, willing himself not to break down in front of the small group of mourners.
afterward, when the empty coffin was lowered into the ground, he stood motionless, staring at the fresh mound of earth. a few people offered condolences, their words shallow and meaningless. he didn’t respond, barely even acknowledged them. what could they say? no words could bring you back.
once everyone left, rafe stayed behind. minutes turned into hours as he sat on the damp grass, staring at the grave as though he could will it to undo itself. he whispered apologies to the air, his voice breaking. “i should’ve done something. i should’ve stopped them. i’m so sorry, my baby.”
the days that followed bled together into a haze of grief and self-loathing.
rafe couldn’t stand being at home. every corner of the house reminded him of you. the couch where you’d curled up with a blanket and a book, the kitchen where you’d danced with him to music only the two of you could hear—it was all too much. he turned to the only thing that numbed the pain: alcohol.
whiskey became his constant companion, the burn in his throat a welcome distraction from the ache in his heart. he barely ate, barely slept. the nightmares wouldn’t let him. every time he closed his eyes, he saw you falling, the cold water dragging you under while he screamed your name. he’d wake up drenched in sweat, his chest heaving, the echo of your voice fading into silence.
he stopped answering his phone. friends tried to check in on him, but he pushed them away. he couldn’t face their pity, couldn’t stand the thought of them telling him to “move on.”
how could he move on when the love of his life was gone?
the two-month mark came and went, and rafe was a shadow of the man he used to be. his once meticulously styled hair was unkempt, his clothes rumpled, his face hollow from lack of sleep and too many sleepless nights spent drowning in liquor.
he spent most of his days wandering aimlessly, haunted by memories of you. he would catch glimpses of you everywhere—in the stranger who had your laugh, in the perfume that smelled like yours. his heart would leap, only to crash when he realized it wasn’t you.
one evening, he found himself on the beach, the waves crashing against the shore. he sank into the sand, letting the cold wind whip against his face. he stared at the horizon, the sun dipping below the water in a blaze of gold and crimson.
“i don’t know how to do this without you,” he whispered to the empty expanse of ocean. his voice cracked, and he buried his face in his hands, the weight of his grief crushing him.
for rafe, the world had stopped the moment you disappeared. time dragged on, but he remained frozen, lost in a limbo of regret and longing. he didn’t know if he could survive without you.
he wasn’t sure he even wanted to.
his nightmares were relentless. every second he closed his eyes, he was back on that boat, watching helplessly as you were thrown overboard. the icy waves swallowed you, your desperate cries for help echoing in his ears. he’d wake up gasping, drenched in sweat, his chest heaving as he reached out for you in the darkness—only to find cold sheets and empty space.
you weren’t there, and the realization gutted him every time.
the only way he knew how to cope was to drown himself in alcohol. bottles littered the floor of his house, their contents his only escape from the crushing weight of his grief. the whiskey blurred the edges of his pain, but it never truly numbed it. instead, it left him hollow, stumbling through a life that felt meaningless without you.
the storm outside was fierce, rain pelting against the windows and wind howling like a wounded animal. rafe sat slumped on the couch, a nearly empty bottle of whiskey dangling from his fingers. he stared blankly at the television, though he wasn’t watching it. the sound was muted, the images flickering across the screen as if mocking his apathy.
the sharp sound of glass shattering upstairs jolted him from his stupor. for a moment, he froze, his foggy mind struggling to process it. he shook his head, muttering to himself, “you’re losing it, rafe.”
but then he heard it again—a faint creak of floorboards. His heart began to race, adrenaline cutting through the haze of alcohol. grabbing a nearby lamp as a makeshift weapon, he stumbled toward the stairs, each step heavier than the last.
he pushed open the bedroom door, his breath hitching at what he saw.
you were there.
at first, he thought it was another cruel trick of his mind. you stood by the window, your body bruised, your clothes torn and soaked from the rain. your hair was a tangled mess, your face pale and gaunt, but it was you.
“rafe…” your voice cracked, barely more than a whisper.
“n... no,” he muttered, shaking his head. his grip on the lamp tightened. “you’re not real. you’re not—”
“i am,” you interrupted, taking a shaky step toward him. “i got away. i—i’m here.”
the lamp fell from his hands, clattering to the floor as he stared at you, his chest rising and falling rapidly. when your knees buckled, he lunged forward, catching you before you could hit the ground.
the moment your weight fell into his arms, he knew. you were real.
a sob broke from his throat as he held you tightly, his fingers digging into your sides as if afraid you’d disappear again. “you’re alive,” he choked out, his voice raw. “oh, my God, you’re alive.”
“i am,” you murmured weakly, your hands clutching at his shirt. “i am.”
rafe carried you to the bathroom, his arms trembling with relief and adrenaline. he set you down on the edge of the tub, his hands shaking as he turned on the water, testing the temperature to make sure it wasn’t too hot.
“i... i need to—you need to get cleaned up,” he said, his voice unsteady. he avoided your eyes, his movements jerky and unsure. “you’re freezing. God, you’re so cold.”
you didn’t protest, too weak and tired to do much more than nod. he helped you out of your soaked clothes, his touch gentle, his eyes filled with guilt and tenderness.
once the tub was filled, he eased you into the warm water, his heart breaking at the way you winced. he knelt beside the tub, his sleeves rolled up as he carefully washed away the grime and salt from your skin. his hands trembled as they ran through your hair, untangling the knots with a tenderness that brought tears to your eyes.
“i thought i lost you,” he whispered, his voice cracking. “i thought—i thought you were gone forever.”
“i almost was,” you admitted, your voice barely audible.
tears streamed down his face as he leaned forward, pressing his forehead against your damp hair. “you’re safe now,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. “i’m not letting you go again. i promise.”
after the bath, rafe wrapped you in the softest towel he could find and carried you to his bed. he brought you water, food, anything you might need, though you barely managed a few bites. he sat beside you, his hand never leaving yours, as if reassuring himself that you were really there.
that night, for the first time in months, he didn’t have nightmares. Instead, he fell asleep with you in his arms, the steady rhythm of your breathing the only sound he needed to finally find peace.
CURRENT TAGLIST⋆⭒˚。⋆
@maybankslover ��� @diorstarkey
#lizzieswrites𝜗𝜚#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x you#drew starkey x you
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Hellooooooooo
Ok first off I LOVE YOUR WORK THERE SO GOOD AND SO WELL WRITTEN THAT I WANNA EAT THEM TO GAIN POWER
Second I wanna submit a request if that’s ok
An x reader with Vi where the reader is touch repulsed but at the same time touch staved?? How would Vi react to that and how would they as a couple get through it and make reader comfortable with being touched in an affectionate way ?
I have no clue if this makes sense
This is me self reflecting and it shows I’m sorry
If you don’t want to write it I completely get it you don’t have to if you don’t want too.
Thank you
aah thank you so much, lovely!! YOU'RE TOO KIND!!! and this was such an interesting prompt to get, thank you for sending it!! hope you enjoy!
vi notices that you don't like being touched.
she sees how you shy away from her hands, how you can only last in a hug for a second before you need to escape.
it confuses vi in the beginning, makes her wonder if it's her fault somehow. maybe she's too rough, too heavy-handed. maybe you can only tolerate her from a distance; only allowing her to get close for a moment before it's too much.
it hurts; it fucking does.
and it leads to an argument that has both of you screaming at the top of your lungs. she's furious and confused, and you're furious and crying. it doesn’t end until you're storming out of your shared home, disappearing for hours.
you don't come home until it's midnight, and by that point, vi's called everyone that she knows if they've seen you. she's about to go out herself when the front door suddenly opens, revealing a puffy-eyed and sniffling you. you stare at each other for a moment before vi's reaching for you, her own expression crumpling with the weight of her tears.
you allow her to draw you in, only this time you don't pull away. this time, you withstand it until vi's had her fill. until vi's sure that you're alright and safe and home.
one am finds you both on the couch, facing each other as you fidget with your hands. vi watches you carefully, sees how you struggle to form words before you sigh.
"it isn't you," you begin. "it's never been you. it's just something i've struggled with since i was young." you stay quiet for a second. "being touched freaks me out. i don't like being held for too long because it feels like i can't escape. makes me feel vulnerable..." you close your eyes. "that happened once and i just don't want it to happen again."
vi's heart shatters in her chest, millions of pieces raining down on the pit of her stomach. she feels sick; she feels like she wants to throw up. she wants to punch something, scream, hunt down the very bastard who dared laid their hands on you in such a way.
you who is the sweetest, kindest person she's ever known. subjected to be trapped against your will.
vi swallows, feeling tears well up behind her eyes.
"i'm so sorry," she murmurs softly, and you aim a weak smile her way. "i didn't think that—"
you shake your head. "you couldn't have known," you say. "the sad thing is that i love it when you touch me. when you hold my hand or curl your arm around my waist. when you pull me in for a hug...i love all of it." you then pull in a shaky breath. "but my body can't seem to recognise your touch as safe, and it hurt so much because i want to—" your voice chokes up around a sob and vi's flying across the couch, sitting close to comfort but not close enough to startle.
"hey," she soothes. "i love you so much, y'know that? and love goes beyond touching. it's about how we feel towards each other, and that goes above anything else." she takes a gentle hold of your finger, ensuring you can let go if you wish to. "do i love touching you? yes. but do i love you? more than fucking anything. so don't worry about this, okay? whatever you want to do, we'll do it and go at your pace."
at this point, you're freely sobbing now, tears rolling down your cheeks as you take in shuddering breaths. you use your free hand to wipe at your tears, giving a wobbly smile as you say, "how did i get so lucky with you?"
vi huffs a laugh, eyes soft as she squeezes your finger.
"i ask myself that question about you every single day."
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Hii could you write something sweet and fluffy for semi/player380 x fem!reader x min-su/player125? (If you don't wanna write for a three person relationship you can just do semi x reader) Have a good day !! :)
I was grabbing my computer so fast once i saw your request. SO EXCITED TO WRITE THISSSSS
Paring 𖹭 Semi x Fem!reader x min-su
Summary 𖹭 Reader was feeling down so semi and min-su decides to throw her a mini party.ᐟ
𐙚 "Hey, Semi Don't you see Y/n over there sulking?" Min-su whispery yells to Semi while She was peacefully strolling on her phone, looking thru apps.
𐙚"Yeah now that you mention it, she's been looking down ever since this morning, I wonder what's wrong with her?" Semi replies while putting down her phone sitting up straight turning her head to look at Min-su
𐙚"I'm not sure, but I'm going to go check if she's fine." Min-su says back. "Alright" semi says while watching Min-su slowly approach Y/n's figure as she's slumped on the couch watching TV
𐙚"Yn??, Are you okay? Me and Semi are worried about you, you've been acting depressed since this morning..." "Mm 'fine, don't worry" you murmured under your breath slumping even more into the couch.
𐙚 "Well it doesn't seem like it... Tell us what's wrong y/n" "ugh Min-su i just told you that I'm fine. Stop worrying about me. IM going to go take a nap.
𐙚Yn slowly retreats to their shared bedroom Semi shoots Min-su a glare and ask's what was all that about
"She just wouldn't tell me what was wrong?" Min-su says quietly to Semi. "Well now we know somethings up for sure... Man, I wish she would just tell us"
𐙚 "...." "Hey Min-su, Let's do something fun for her. Cleary she's had a bad day. Let's cheer her up" Semi spills "Smart thinking Semi! Yeah, let's do something for Y/n!"
𐙚"Let's head over to the store and get the stuff" Semi say's "Aright"
𐙚Semi and Min-su were now at the store looking for little part supplies for yn's little special party "Hey Semi I've gotten all the stuff we need" Min-su says "Yeah same here, Let's go check out, we needed get home before yn wakes back up."
𐙚Semi and Min-su head back home and quietly opens the front door putting all the bags on the table, carefully to not alarm or wake you up in the process of them decorating the living room. They start decorating by getting small ballons and blowing them up to put on the floor of the living room. They then start putting all of the snacks they have bought onto the living room table.
𐙚"Min-su go get some blankets so we can put them on the couch, We can all watch a movie together once she finally wakes up " Semi goes to the kicthen to get more decoration to hang up.
𐙚Finally done with everything al they had to do was wait for y/n to wake up from her peaceful slumber. "I think I'm going to die, she's been asleep for so long" "Min-su stop being inpatient. You know yn hates that. Just as Semi says something yn walks in the living room.
𐙚 What's all this guys? Did you guys have a party and not invite me? seriously so rude. WTH!!!" "No no no no yn you got it all wrong me and Semi did all this for you!" "Right, we have been waiting 3 hours for you to get up, Min-su almost died just sitting around for so long!" Semi says
𐙚 "WHATTT??? Thats so sweet of you guys. I'm going to cry." "Yeah, Me and Semi wanted to do something about your mood you've had earlier, we hope you like it... "LIKE IT?? I LOVE ITT!" "Thats great to hear , speaking from the fact i spent 200$ for all of this. semi whispers under her breath . "Hm? what did you say Semi? i didn't hear you. "I didn't say anything" Semi says while shoving her hands in her pockets and getting up to show yn all the snacks on the table. "So many options of snacks! you guys went all out! "Yeah heh, we didn't know what you were in the mood for, so we got a bit of everything! "Omg you guys are the best! This honestly makes up from the shitty morning I've had" Y/n speaks
𐙚"Were happy you love everything we did for you tonight, let's enjoy it before the night is over" Min-su says while walking towards the couch and clicking on a tv show to binge watch the entire night "I'm sorry i made a fuss earlier, speaking like that... I don't know what i was thinking. It was rude for me to do that. "Hey...it's alright, we knew you wasn't feeling too good, we are just glad you like what we did for you" Semi says "Yeah, she's right yn, its ok we just want you to feel better. "You both are the best, I love you guys.! " "We love you back" both Min-su and Semi says together.
Im sorry if its bad. It seems very demoted of emotion! I WILL WORK ON THATTT
Also! Thank you very anonymous person who requested that for me <333
I'm really tired now.(it's 9am)
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girlbossed too hard.... unless...
#like a lot of stuff about kh. one thing being its sprawling plot. love it all fitting together like that#anyway wanted to write a story like that. here i am with my ocs. and now im worried ive made it too confusing#1. maybe it's just because I haven't finished fixing plot holes? 2. maybe it's bc im not telling it in the right order? (random comics)#3. maybe it's because I assume ppl know more than they probably remember? 4. maybe im bad at explaining it?#anyway I talk to ppl about it and they're like ???? about things so now im like hm. i done messed up#problem is. it all makes perfect sense in my head#nomura is this how you felt? is this just the consequences of my actions??#anyway rip me. doomed to pain and suffering since the days of my youth#wanna get better at talking and expressing things but ACK. so hard!!!!#august rambles#text#you may be thinking huh?? you're expressing something rn. and yes. you see. my disease is so annoying. it is not consistent#sometimes I think about it enough i think about ways to talk about it. sometimes I think about it enough and it soaks into my life so...#someone else goes 'hey whats that?' and i go 'oh tiny info about it' as if secretly the person knew everything else because uh#i thought about it so hard. it must be common knowledge??? i don't know things other people don't??#anyway screaming crying i feel like I'm not expressing this right. doomed.
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7am, eating cold leftover teriyaki stir-fry for breakfast and crying over blorbos
#normal Saturday morning behavior#redacted spoilers#redacted audio#redacted sam#Seven.txt#rp audio stuff#well. crying over one singular blorbo in particular. Sam's still got me in an emotional chokehold#and i'm too sad to even make a stupid little joke abt how i wouldn't mind if it was a physical one too. ayeee *insert sad eyebrow wiggle*#no but seriously. i have so many feelings abt him and i can't even say it all bc some of it isn't public info yet#eh fuck it i'll just draft this until the audio goes public and then i'll post it once it's no longer Exclusive Info#bc i dont wanna leak Early Access stuff but i have to get this out of my system rn and the new audio is part of what sparked these thoughts#which is funny bc i. literally haven't even listened to it yet. i'm not Ready 😭#where's that tiktok screenshot that's like. 'hyperfixation so bad that i can't even engage with the source material' bc that's me rn#like bro Sam only won the poll like. 2 or 3 days ago and Eric is Already dropping a new Sam audio?? hello? Mr. Redacted i wasn't prepared#anyways i was spoiling myself by perusing the comments last night trying to get a feel for if it's gonna be more angst or comfort#and i saw a comment that absolutely shattered me. and it reignited all my sad thoughts about Sam's eventual. uh. y'know. death.#apparently they plant a tree together or smthn in the new audio (which already has me & my beloved 10y/o orange tree feeling some kinda way#but to the individual in the comments who brought to all our minds the image of Sam sitting beneath that tree in 30 or so years time#when he's decided that he's ready to die and sits out there waiting for the sun to rise..................... 🥲#i'm gonna need u to compensate me for all of that unexpected emotional damage /j /nm#i'm Still not over what he told Darlin' while they had their talk about the future up on his roof together. that audio killed me#then yesterday i was listening to my Sam & Darlin' playlist while cleaning. and Malibu Nights by LANY came on. which i always skip bc Sad#but i let it play and just started crying. standing in the middle of the room all disheveled and holding a broom. as one does.#iirc that song is one that Eric himself said is applicable to Sam which is why/how i found it and put it on the playlist. and god. g o d#hm. i hope that wasn't Patreon exclusive info. i can't remember if it was a public post where he said that or not. hope it's okay to share#but if we can take that song as like. unofficial canon for Sam then that also confirms my idea that he used to drink to cope#which makes the opening lines of Fix What You Didn't Break by Nate Smith even more applicable. i should go edit that post actually#anyways i'm just. feeling a lot. and i love Sam very much and i don't want him to die. but i want him to do what he wants at the same time#Alexis took so fucking much from him. he deserves to live - and end - his life on his own terms. ... i think i need to go write something#*casually fishes this post out of the drafts 3 and a half days later* hi so uh. i wrote a 4k oneshot :) and will hopefully post it tomorrow
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wish i could stop losing stuff irretrievably. some hardware error emptied out my recycle bin a couple days earlier. just to shit on a day i'd spent being genuinely happy about the art i create. i guess. i'm tired of compromises, sick of lying that "it wasn't that important anyway", and throwing up at "oh well, can't be helped".
and yet. and yet. despite every pain, both major and minor, the love is there. the love is still there. guess i've just somehow miraculously hit that point (or gone past it a long time ago) where every grievance beyond a certain amount hurts an unspeakable amount more than it should. and it stacks. probably went overboard a while back. don't know when.
still, i adore my project. still got someone in whose arms i feel safe. hope i'll get out someday. hope i'll get a win.
#i truly do believe that if i get the rest of my work back‚ the important bits#then everything else is gonna be all fine. negligible losses. one more pain on the road to victory.#i learned what digital corpses look like yesterday. zeroes where bs and 4s and Hs should be. it sits badly in my gut. it is difficult to#have hope.#and yet#and yet i will never lose mine until it's all truly over#i'm hoping for a win. it'll be the biggest win of my life at this point. everything else can go to hell at that point.#just give me the news‚ doc. give me the tiebreaker. tell me to live or to despair.#got things to live for beyond that one piece of art i've made. got a few of them‚ in fact.#yet a life without my art seems as bleak as they come. don't know what to look for beyond that. just let me win this one time.#seven years of constant pain is more than enough no matter how you slice it. if i'm not given closure here‚ for this one thing‚ then i'll#give it to myself. will be cruel. will be tough. think it holds less pain still.#but i don't want it. don't wanna think about it. crying as i write this. don't wanna face the music. hate how it hinges on that. are all#artists like this‚ or is it just me who is insane?#i've moved on with the help of my art. without my art‚ i can't move on. can't move on from the lack of moving on‚ either. just loss after#loss after loss. but maybe. maybe not. if i win‚ i'll just cuss out this pain i'm going through right now for the rest of my days and#eventually laugh about it. losses will become scars on living tissue. emphasize on l i v i n g tissue. living‚ as in can create‚ can#continue to love‚ can continue to adore and to help and to play and to smile and all sorts of things. can do all that good stuff that makes#a life worth livin'.#so. dunno if i'm transmitting. dunno if anyone's listening. but i'm hoping for contact.#logs#black blank blah-blah-blah
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you know you're fucked when you start getting fic ideas
#its fun and games when you're just reading it but shit goes down when it starts growing in your brain#anyway i really wanna write bruce wayne i think he looks fun to study#he's the kind of character i kinda want to tear apart and look under a microscope with#the urge to identify the most tough guy character and think about what it would take to make him cry#guy who has unnatural control over his feelings and his expression of those feelings meet my unstoppable force of made up emotional trauma#man fueled by rage with terrifying self control because he refuses to kill even against the worst people you're so silly#i have to make him a good dad though I can't stand the trope of making guys who have strong morals being terrible parents#i think he would try to be a good parent but he's not the most emotionally intelligent so he would really struggle#i don't think he would ever be intentionally abusive just... prone to making bad decisions#he's been emotionally constipated since his parents died give him a break#idk i wanna spray this guy in cuddle pollen and force him to ask his kids for a hug that would be fun for me
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just needed to say but its 100% ok to write characters out-of-character.
if you craft a version of a character that is completely different from the canon character its not necessarily bad writing and that fact alone doesn't make you a bad writer in any capacity.
its ok to use a preexisting character as a starting place to write your own characters even if you're not changing names or changing a lot about them. I've read and adored a bunch of fics where the characters are definitely not like they are in canon and if i saw that version of the character in the show id be so confused. but I'm decidedly not watching the show, im reading your fic and im completely immersed in your version of the character.
using characters as a vessel to make your own story based on your own experiences is not in any way inferior to writing fix-its of canon or adhering exclusively to canon characterizations. not everyone will enjoy it or read it because no tropes or ways of writing will appeal to everyone, but there will always be someone that enjoys your work and appreciates what you do.
writing is fucking difficult no matter which angle you choose to take. and theres no trope or plot or personal experience that you can't write for any character because there are no laws of writing that say you have to stick to your source material.
its still a good idea to tag if you're characters don't adhere to canon characterizations just because like any trope your reader wants to be able to know what they'll be reading beforehand (and it'll help clarify that the mischaracterization is not an accident you forgot to edit but just how you chose to write this character)
basically your writings are still good and valid even if it wouldn't happen in the show. in some cases "they wouldn't do that in the show" is a damn compliment.
#i wrote this with steddie in mind but it applies to most anything methinks#because i canon characterization for steve and fanon don't always line up but that's not a problem#i love that we like exploring different possibilities for his character from what his parents are like to his relationship with the party#and this applies to smut too it doesnt fucking matter how you wanna write it cause we havent seen them have gay sax so its not like we know#and even if we did it doesn't matter! write them however you want dammit#and especially when writing about serious stuff like if you're projecting your experience with eds or chronic pain or abuse or depression#onto a character who doesn't explicitly have that experience#sharing your experience realistically does more good for you and the readers than trying to make the character canon-compliant#and not to say everyone has to like the thongs you write. no writing will make everyone happy. even the most critical acclaimed works dont#make everyone happy (there are people who don't like arcane for crying out loud and thats the most exceptional/adored show I've ever seen)#steddie tumblr#because those are the only fic i read these days#and we have a lot of different popular tropes that aren't canon compliant and i want you guys to know you're epic and cool#fic writing#writing rambles#writing rant#writing positivity#devon thinks sometimes
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#i wish i had any fucking chill at all#i am so fucking aggressive about how i feel and i fucking hate it#every single part of me wants to break everything around me and scream and cry until my throat is raw#over literally nothing.#this time over stupid video game#once over an argument in my head#sometimes over a conversation going poorly#and instead of the catharsis of busting my knuckles and skull open and breaking my teeth on every object in a 10 ft radius#i break one thing i dont have the time or energy to fix right now. and feel like shit about it.#so now im sitting here writing this out and shaking like a fucking nervous mutt trying my best to...what exactly#minimize property damage#try to impose discipline#act like i have any control over how my body functions#the dumbest part of this is now i have a pretty decent idea on how to repair joycons and procontrollers and how to troubleshoot and#what bits need to fit with others and what specifically is annoying to put together. i wonder if i would have more control if i#didnt enjoy putting stuff back together. its almost like a sick incentive. like i act like garbage and then fix it and get dopamine about it#i need therapy. moreso i need someone to talk at i think. i wanna get drunk and complain and not have to act like i have a plan#biggest thing is i cant sleep. but fixing that is the plan i still dont have and at this point may never achieve. i feel like a failure.#fuck#at least I've stopped shaking and now am just depressed. maybe i should just play games i don't think about until side order comes out. idk
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it's all a bit weird and strange
#sfhsdjkhgsdfhsjifhsdifhsdf#it's like fine#i had some water#and it's like fine but also college starts in two weeks i should really do my transfer application but i'm scared i'm also scared that i am#not having the Correct experience#everything is so hard when i think about it for more than five seconds#i'm not really looking forward to my schedule this semester#and i know i'm just a sophomore but i feel like everything i smoving too quickly what happens after i graduate college time is moving so fa#and yet so slow at the same time#i can't hold onto it it's gotten away from me it's like 19 years have gotten away from me#my stuff#and like all i wanna do is write and read and watch the strange planet show and do all my tasks but to do all those things seems to hard bu#i know if i can do all those things i can be a person#and i AM a person it's just#ugh#sometimes i find it so difficult to like myself#and like i get it don't we all#idk but i think when you think about your life you shouldn't just want to cry#take it one day at a time i guess#should sleep it's late i know#everything is too fast and too much all the time#but it's fine
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that was mean- nicholas
summary: nicholas was having a bad week and gave you the silent treatment.
warning: argument, crying, happy ending
a/n: i couldn't stop thinking abt this no joke. so ofc i had to write it out
from late at night till he left early this morning for work nicholas has been either quiet rude or both.
we haven't spoken to eachother or not even silents acts of love. nothing.
he cut his alarm clock off and i tried to give him a hug before he got out the bed and he pushed me off of him "not right now" he grumbled and got out of bed
when he left for work i said 'bye' to maybe break the silence shared between us, but i got no response. it was starting to get lonely. i missed my bestfriend that was also my boyfriend
i had nobody to mess with or someone to talk to about my day.
to stop these lingering thoughts i go back to bed to maybe get my mind off of things.
--
i wake up around 8 am which was later than the time i usally woke up around, but today was sorta a lazy day.
it was gloomy not much sun was shining, it rained a little here and there. it was more of a slow day for me so the extra rest was very much needed
i text my boyfriend forgetting about the whole silent treatment ordeal.
me: how's your day going so far?? :)
and to no suprise i was left on delivered and soon left on seen. i messaged him periodically throught the day; hoping that maybe he would reply
it was almost time for dinner which normally nicholas cooks cause he's just better at it, but i didn't know when he was coming home or if he would even do it, so i look up some quick easy recipes and nothing struck my fancy but the pizza recipe. cause how hard could it really be?
i put a packet of yeast into my bowl along with some flour, water, oil, and salt. i let that sit for 30 minutes then im back to cooking again.
spreading flour onto the counter and placing the dough onto it; kneading it into a circle shape. this was harder than i thought
i look around for the marinara sauce and i put it into a different bowl and add a few light seasonings.
i paste that onto the dough, then i sprinkle some alot of cheese onto the pizza and my additional toppings bell peppers, spinach, and mushrooms.
i was so proud of myself especially sense i wasnt the cook, out of me and nicholas. i was really excited for him to try what i made but again i highly doubt he would even eat the food.
i put the pizza away into the oven completely forgetting to set a timer and put on a movie while i wait.
--
a smell of burning was the first thing that woke me up. "shit shit shit" i repeat totally freaking out remembering i left the pizza in the oven.
i get a rag and ineffectivley wave smoke out the air. when i open the oven it smelled horrible. i was coughing from all the smoke that had entered my lungs.
i take the burning pizza out and throw it into the sink, and hose it down with the water.
thats when i hear the front door open and mentally face palm. "what's that smell?" he asks "i kinda burnt a pizza that i tried to make"
"of course you did" he mutters sounding unimpressed. "and the fuck you mean 'kinda' you obviously did burn a damn pizza" he gestures to the chunk of charcoal burnt pizza
"it's not like i did it on purposes or something if thats what you think" my tone sounding a bit confronting.
"It's smells fucking horrible so open a damn window first off" he took a step closer raising his voice.
"you don't pay for shit so i don't understand why you almost had this place in flames secondly. then you also wanna blow up my phone while im working for crying out loud what do you want from me!" he yelled directly in my face
and im sure he knows by now i hate being yelled at. it's something my parents did and overall doesn't solve anything
i just take it, i didn't wanna fight so i go over to the nearest window and crack it open so the smoke clears.
my eyes watered from all the harsh words he could dish out but not the equal amount of attention "well.. you are- when i was.. ugh s'not my fault" i couldn't get a full sentence out. i felt so belittled in this moment
"im going to bed i don't have time for your stupid ass shit" those words hurt more than he thinks.
he had the most patience for me, always making time for us and now he doesnt.
"that's so mean.. you're being so mean" i wipe some tears that had fallen. i turned away from him silently crying.
the peices of my hair stuck to my tear-soaked cheeks. "wait- I'm sorry please don't cry" nicholas' voice was filled with regret.
i lazily push him away from me but he doesn't budge. his arms wrap around me bringing me into his familiar embrace. "I'm so sorry for being an asshole. I've been having a long shitty week and i know thats not an excuse so you don't even have to forgive me."
"you're everything to me. i swear i didn't mean it." he adds
the unforgettable cruel words he'd said to me earlier shoved ontop of his sweet loving words made me cry more.
i let him hold my trembling body as sobs tore through my chest, each inhale was ragged and uneven.
my hands clutched the material of his shirt "im so sorry sweetheart i never wanna make you cry" he explains in such a low voice, giving my hair strokes in attempt to calm me.
my face still burried into his neck tears now starting to dry away, and my breathing starting to even out. he carried me over to the couch and placed me in his lap
i was drained from all the crying, the tense feeling in my body beginning to melt away when i really started to feel nicholas' touch. my eyes drooped again this time staying shut for longer.
i was too tired to resist the sleep that had tooken over. and being cradled in his arms didn't help.
"I'll order pizza for the both of us alright?" he took me off of his lap and placed me on our couch. then lays one of our throw blankets ontop of me. "can we talk in the mornin'?" is the last thing i remember asking before dozing off.
a/n: can yall tell idk how to make pizza
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#i usually put this kind of stuff in the drafts so you don't need to read it. go ahead if you want i don't care just like. don't respond lol#but this is just for me to vent publicly so it feels like the thoughts went somewhere#my sister's best friend's mom just got put in hospice and they say she has about 3 more days#and i could hear my little sister bawling when my mom told her and it's breaking my heart#they're barely teenagers they're too young for this#and my mom's trying to write an email to the father and she can't fucking do it. i wanna help but she doesn't want any which i get#i can hear my sister either giggling or crying in her room right now i can't tell which but it sounds more like laughing. i hope it is#my mom and my sister are going to do to the hospice room to say goodbye to her i think tomorrow#and i really just want to be able to hang out with my sister bc i know it's gonna be really scary for her after but i have to work#if one person complains about their problems to me at work tomorrow i'm gonna get fucking fired for what i do next#that's probably not true but i'm gonna feel like it#i don't know this woman but i know my sister loves her and my mom is friends with the father so i mean i'm not really grieving but they are#and i wish i knew what to do#at least this was somewhat expected like she was in the later stages of her cancer but i don't think anyone was thinking it would happen no#i don't know if i should post this. i want to because i have so many posts like this in my drafts and it never makes me feel any better#but i don't like sharing ultra personal stuff like this especially about other people even if nobody knows who i am#i'll post it for now but i'll delete it later. i just need it to be out there a little bit so there's proof it exists#i think this is something i should be adding trigger tags for?#tw cancer#tw death#tw grief#shut up hanna
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Okay this is going to drive me INSANE. D:>
Dearly beloved, Phandom darlings...
Can DANNY EAT VIDEO GAME/TV FOOD?
I... I NEED to know. You don't UNDERSTAND!? Think about it. No, seriously. THINK about all those HIGHLY unrealistic, too good to be true, PERFECT looking meals. Animated shows n games etc where there are chefs who will "cook for Anybody!"
Now think about being 14 going 20. A teenager. A broke college student. Your fridge is empty and everything you touch? Comes back to LIFE. You're... you're just so hungry. Tired. Your bruises have bruises and you have a paper due tomorrow.
I kinda want to CRY.
Can only eat cup ramen so many times before you DO.
And this show? That commercial? Yonder cooking game?? Well... they did a REAL good job animating it. It looks so WARM. So FILLING and COMFORTING. You can practically SMELL it.
You look down at your sad, soggy, cheap but you can afford it, EZ Noodles and? Feel something BREAK inside. You... you KNOW you can travel inside technology. KNOW this. Have done it before. Why... why AREN'T you? You can't keep living like this.
You gotta TRY, right?
I? Wanna believe it TOTALLY works?? Because Ectoplasm is weird like that? And just shrugs? Says "actual food, the concept of food backed by electricity, what's the difference? Sure, we can fuck with this"? And so Danny? IMMEDIATELY fucking switches his diet.
Like? Dead stop screech, slam on the breaks, u-turn to take that last off-ramp. Type IMMEDIATE.
Grocery bill? No, no, you mistake him! No. NOW it's his "carefully researched for their cooking, games and shows" bill. Touch his collection and he'll FUCKING BITE.
They got sticky notes on the cases. Menus n lil fold out "grocery store" locations. He punched a dragon for this fruit. Mmmmm, home cooked meeeeeals~
Just? Weird Foodie Danny. Yes he DOES know what those steaks taste like. While YOU fuckers were staring at the cat girls bizangas, HE was eating granny cat lady's home made meatball stew! Ha! YOU FOOLS!
More then that? I want him to write reviews. Like "yeah, fight system was OKAY but- *5 hour glowing rant about the food, sounding like a food critic who'd actually fucking gone and loved it* " and people are like?? Who? Is this funky lil madman? This is hilarious?
I want it to be DPxDC JUST? So everyone slowly starts to play the game "Meta or Shtick?" Because no one REALLY knows who he is. This dude gets POPULAR though. For some reason can't be hacked (shame on you guys! Way to try and ruin the FUN!). And like? Eventually? Someone just fucking ASKS?
And Danny is like... " wouldn't YOU like to know, weatherboy?"
So everyone is like:
"Meta."
But hey... since they're already ASSUMING~? >:3c WHOOOOO wants to help him PAY RENT~? Let's VLOG this fucker! Wooooo! Say "hi" Catchef! *feline noises* like? It's like a let's play combined with a mukbang.
Teen Heros everywhere are FACINATED. Game developers are suddenly like? "If there's food. You BETTER make it look amazing. We want that weird YouTube twink to... whatever his powers are, our game! Free viral marketing!" Food channels? Rending their clothes, on their KNEES, please! PLEASE! Just ANSWER OUR EMAIL! Just ONE SHOW! A one off! Guest appearance!
We have MONEY!!!
All while Danny? Is finally happy with his life. Weird as hell. Harrasing the world. Good food on the regular. Gets to travel, kinda. Best of all? He's raising money from it! Can help people! Now... who wants salad?
@babbling-babull @hdgnj @hypewinter @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @dcxdpdabbles @the-witchhunter @lolottes
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Haiii i've never submitted a request so bare with me.
What do you think about a criminal jk who's been in prison for over a year (don't know what crime u can pick honestly) him and y/n are in a established relationship and she's been waiting all this time for him to get out. Anyway he comes home and yk.. i'm sure you can get the rest ;)
𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐘 | J.JK
— pairing | fem!oc x criminal!jjk
— summary | (sorry it took so long!🩷) jungkook’s been locked up for 4 years and he’s finally back to see you !
— warning | bad writing (i’m doing my best)
unprotected sex, cursing, praising, daddy kink, dirty talk, crying, fluff(?)
— word count | 3.5k words
— song suggestion | wrong in the right way — chris brown
It was his first night freed from his 4 year jail sentence. After having a buddy drop off his car on the way to her, he was finally there.
Locked up for assault and battery and countless other charges he was finally free and finally able to see his woman again.
His tatted, muscular body stood at her doorstep, “Fuck,” He exhaled, taking a drag from his cigarette.
He was anxious to see her after endless phone calls and letters for years. He surprised her a day early. He finally stopped thinking about it and knocked at her door.
“Coming!” She hurried down the stairs, not expecting any guests at that hour.
She was in her pajama outfit, hair lightly curled and her face bare beside some eye brightener.
She opened the door, and she had almost gone into shock.
She came to a full body pause, color practically draining from her face when she seen him. “J-Jungkook!”
Jungkook's eyes softened at the sight of her, seeing the tears. He stepped forward, grabbing her in a tight embrace.
“I missed you so fucking much Y/n.” He mumbled into her hair. His hands ran up and down her back, holding her close.
She sobbed, “You bastard! Why didn’t you let me know you got out early?! I would’ve picked you up, done my makeup better, took you to dinner—“ She rambled.
Jungkook pulled back, gazing down at her with a smirk.
“Because I wanted to surprise you, Y/n. And you look fucking perfect just like this.” He ran his hand through her hair, tucking a strand behind her ear. “Finally face to face with my queen.”
“Fucking come in.” She sniffed. “All standing here in my doorway.” She hurried him in.
Jungkook stepped inside, his eyes scanning the apartment.
It looked a lot different than what he had remembered. It was a lot more modern and a bit girly. But it still felt like home.
He took a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of her perfume. He followed her to the living room, his eyes locked on her as she walked away from him. He couldn't help but grin.
He was finally home.
“Missed you so much” She sniffed. “I didn’t fucking plan anything— Shit. You gotta be hungry right? Are you cold?”
“Relax baby. I didn’t expect you to be completely ready tonight,” He wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her close to him.
“But yes, I am fucking starving. Even thought I just wanna sit here and hold you.” He nuzzled his face into her neck, breathing in her scent.
“No baby— Gotta take care of you first. Probably want to eat good. Prison must’ve been so rough.” She pouted, babying him.
“Yeah, it was. But nothing's worse than being away from you, ma. You know that, right?” He pulled away from her, turning her around to face him.
He cupped her cheeks, his thumbs rubbing against her soft skin. “I missed your smile, your laugh, your attitude. Everything Y/n.”
“I missed you more than you could imagine Jungkook.” Her lip quivered. “So much.”
“I know, ma. You always made sure I know. You were always the one person I could count on, even behind bars.” He leaned in, pressing his lips to hers.
The kiss was soft and gentle, but it held a depth of passion that only they could understood. “I love you.”
“I love you more. So much more.” She kissed him back, “I’ll cook for you. I’ll show you to our room— I fixed it up for you!”
She led him upstairs, rushing him due to her excitement. “Are you ready to see it?”
“I'm more than ready, ma. I've been dreaming of this moment for so long. I've missed our bed, our room, all of it."
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. "You look stunning, ma. You've never looked more beautiful to me."
Their room looked more homey and relaxing. She bought him a whole new closet full of clothes and shoes to his liking.
“I bought you some new ashtrays to put on your nightstand.” She told him. “There’s some lighters down there too.”
“You're spoiling me. And I’m more than grateful. I can already smell the smoke wafting through the air. You know me more than anyone." He grinned, running his hand over the new clothes.
"I love what you've done here, ma. You really outdid yourself for me and I couldn’t thank you more.” He added, thanking her once more.
“Anyrhing for you. I wanted you to come home and feel comfortable and relaxed.” She smiled.
“Now go shower, change, whatever you need to do to get all that prison time off your skin.” She laughed. “I’m gonna go downstairs and cook you some food that’ll knock you the hell out.”
Jungkook smiled, pulling her into a deep, passionate kiss. "You're the best, ma. I love you so fucking much." He whispered, giving her earlobe a gentle kiss before pulling away. "I'll be down in a few.”
“Take your time baby. Really.” She pecked his cheek, hesitant to leave him while she walked down to the kitchen.
Jungkook grabbed her hand before she could walk away, bringing it to his lips for a gentle kiss.
"Thank you again baby— Seriously." He gave her a reassuring smile, squeezing her hand gently.
She left him and headed back downstairs, prepping dinner for him.
“I’ll miss you!” She called out from the kitchen, blushing and giggling in excitement.
She couldn’t believe he was really out of prison.
For years she spent everyday fantasizing and day dreaming about him finally living at home again. For him to actually be here was ground breaking.
She had devoted herself to that man the entire time he’d been away. Her friends would try to encourage her to see other men to fill in the gaps of his absence but she absolutely refused.
She had many opportunities. She was a beautiful woman.
But no other man could ever compare to Jungkook.
She started preparing a quick yet savory meal for them to eat while he was showering.
She had prepped wonton soup for the actual night of his arrival but she had enough ingredients to make it for him tonight.
Jungkook was upstairs. He stripped down to his white tank, revealing his well-built, tattooed body.
He smirked at himself in the mirror, satisfied with how much he had grown during his time.
He turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature to his liking before stepping in.
After scrubbing and shaving after what felt like forever, Jungkook hummed to himself as he stepped out the shower, feeling refreshed and anew.
He dried himself up before wrapping the towel around his waist, he stepped into the kitchen where his girl was. “Smells amazing baby, what is it?" He kissed her cheek, leaning on the counter.
“I made a homemade wonton soup with a side of rice.” She smiled, “You look clean. Someone’s already comfy back home.”
Jungkook chuckled, “With everything you’ve done, you made it easy.” He grinned as his stomach growled, looking down at himself.
“Go put some clothes on and dry your hair. You’re gonna get sick. I laid out clothes on the bed.” She instructed. “Use my hairdryer in the bathroom. Should be hung up in the bathroom.”
She took care of him and she tried his best to always pamper him. "Yes ma'am." He smiled, standing up and giving her a soft kiss on the cheek. "I'll be right back, baby."
Jungkook went back to the bathroom and dried his hair then put on the clothes she laid out for him.
He took a look at himself in the mirror and smiled. He had been evaluating their home since he arrived, she had really good taste.
He walked back into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around her waist, kissing her neck and inhaling her scent once more.
Couldn’t get enough.
“So much better huh baby?” She hummed, lost in his embrace.
“Definitely, baby. You always make me better." Jungkook whispered in her ear before giving her a soft and lingering kiss.
He reached for the food she was cooking, but she stopped him. “No. I’ll serve you. Go sit down.”
“Body” He obliged, not able to help it but steal another kiss before sitting down to eat with her. "This smells amazing, love."
She served him his soup along with a cup of jasmine hot tea.
She placed his bowl and cup on his side of the table. She served herself after him, sitting across from him. “Let me know if you like it. Too hot, too cold, too spicy, too salty. Anything like that.”
Jungkook blew on his soup before taking a spoon full, burning his tongue a little bit but he didn't care.
He was just desperate for a home cooked meal.
"This is so fucking good, Y/n… like really fucking good." He glanced up at her, giving her a little smirk before taking another bite.
“I’m not just saying that either.” He munched, lost in the taste of his food.
She laughed, “Glad you’ like it.” She enjoyed her soup across from him.
Jungkook finished his soup, but didn't finish his whole bowl of rice.
He sat back and took a sip of his tea. "So how was your day today? Besides making me the best fucking soup I've ever had?"
“I just spent today prepping for you to get here. Cleaned all day.” She exhaled.
“Was the rice not cooked right? You didn’t finish.” She looked at him, concerned a bit at his action.
Jungkook shook his head. "The rice is fine, love. It's just not my favorite thing to eat."
He took another sip of his tea and reached under the table, squeezing her knee. "It’s all I ever ate when I was in there— not really my favorite at the moment."
“Oh my gosh!” Her eyes widened, “I wasn’t even thinking!”
“Baby you make rice with every meal. It’s like muscle memory for you.” He chuckled. “Don’t worry about it. You’re too cute to worry.”
“It’s my man’s first night home from prison. Of course your opinion matters to me.” She sighed.
Jungkook smiled at her and looked down at his empty bowl. He reached for her hand and glanced back up at her. "You don't have to care about anything when it comes to me. I’m amazed by everything you do.”
“Mm so sweet.” She blushed, “Go relax.” She seized their bowls, washing them in the sink.
Jungkook laughed, "I just want to make sure you're happy too. Wouldn’t want my baby like that in her own house" He stood, slowly making his way around the kitchen island.
He wrapped his arms around her waist and moved his lips to her neck, giving her a soft kiss. "Smell so good baby. Can’t get away from you.”
She blushed at the close proximity, continuing the dishes.
Jungkook pulled away from her neck, his eyes glancing over her face. He enjoyed seeing her blush more than he thought he did.
"What's going on in your head? You can tell me you know." He leaned against the counter, watching her intently.
“Nothing.” She shrugged. “I’m just happy you’re here. More than happy I’m just— thankful.”
She started getting emotional, blinking back tears. “I just thought— I thought you’d have to stay longer.”
Jungkook walked towards her, his finger pushed her chin up, making her look at him.
"Don't cry on me now, damn baby. Making me feel guilty.” He wipes away a tear that fell down her cheek with his thumb. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close.
“Sorry sorry” She apologized, fanning herself.
Jungkook smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead, moving her to clear her teary eyes. "Don't apologize for showing your emotions to me. I love how much you care for me."
“You smell so good too.” She hummed against him. “Better than that nasty fresh out of prison smell.” She laughed.
Jungkook grins, sniffing himself to remind her of the smell she meant, his arms squeezing around her. "If you thought it smelled bad..."
He kisses her cheek, “Imagine when I wasn't this clean for four years.” He teased, laughing.
“Ewww.” She giggled, “I’m okay not thinking about that.”
Jungkook chuckles, pulling back to look at her, cupping her cheek and wiping away loose tears with his thumb. "You're so cute."
He was laughing again. "Y/n, I missed you... I really fucking missed you. I don’t care how many times I told you tonight.”
“I missed you too Jungkook— Writing and calling you definitely isn’t as good as having you here at home with me.” She admitted.
Jungkook smiles, his eyes bright with happiness. "Yeah, I know... I fucking hated the phone. But-" He takes her hand in his.
"Being here now, being able to show up in the morning and see you again and again will make up for it all." He flashes her a wide grin.
“Four years was such a long time.” She groaned, walking out from the kitchen and walking up to their bedroom.
Jungkook nods and follows her, watching her hips sway as his thoughts drift to more primal thoughts.
He felt bad for wanting to get straight to it. But she had been teasing him in those
"It was. But hey-" He says from behind her. He wraps arms around her mid-section. "I'm here now. Should we get to it? Break our bed in together?"
“Oh my gosh you’re so annoying” She smacks his arm, “Go put on a movie while I change. You’re gonna be scrolling for a minute. I’ll be back.”
Jungkook laughs and lets go, jumping onto the bed. He grabbed the remote off the nightstand, surfing through the different streaming services.
He hadn’t seen anything like this in quite some time, but he already knew what he was looking for. She was definitely wrong about him scrolling for a minute.
She changed into a pajama set, being sure to show off a bit by leaving some buttons undone.
She knew what was gonna go down tonight, she just wanted him to wait for it.
She made her way back to the bed, resting her body beside him closely. “What’re we watching?”
“Starting tonight we’re gonna watch every Marvel movie made since I got locked up.”
“Are you serious?” She groaned. “That’s an insane amount of movies.”
“But,” He pouted cutely. “Your baby has been locked up for sooo long.”
“I hate you.”
He wraps arms around her mid-section, resting his head on her waist. "You know you love me, ma... and I sure as fuck love you."
“I love you more” She laughed and pecked his lips, playing with his hair as they watched the first movie together.
Jungkook hums in contentment, closing his eyes and letting her play with his hair.
Throughout the movie, Jungkook couldn’t help but grow more and more desperate.
He was on edge for the past few months. In prison they called and wrote letters but recently her letters had been more
Seductive.
Letters that consisted wordy details of her burning desire and unstoppable urge to have him.
“One more? Please? Last time really.” He pleaded.
“Fine.” She pecked his lips.
A few minutes later.
“Please?”
“Okay.” She pecked his lips.
More minutes go by.
“One more? Last time really.”
“Ugh fine.” She groaned, pecking his lips once more.
“Fuck I can’t take it." He groans as she pecks his lips, unable to help but leaning in and making out with her as their movie plays in the background.
“Don’t know how you expected this to go when you look like this.” He mumbled against her lips, mouth getting messier. “Wanna fuck you so bad.”
“Need to make love to you since you got locked up” Her kisses grew more demanding.
Jungkook flips them over, pinning her down onto the bed and kissing her harder in return. "I needed you to fuckin' kiss me that hard when I was locked up.”
His hips buck up against hers, grinding his hardened cock against her thighs. “Dreamt about this every fuckin’ night.”
“I know baby fuck— me too” She grunted.
Jungkook reaches over to unbutton her pajama pants, before sliding them down her legs slowly— trailing kisses down her thighs as he does. "Take 'em off, baby. I wanna see how fuckin' wet you are for me already."
“Wanted dick since you got locked up— Been wet since you got released.” She couldn’t help the bashful expression all over her.
Yeah?" Jungkook grins, slipping his fingers underneath her panties and teasingly spreading her lower lips, his fingers slipping and teasing over her clit. "And how wet are you actually baby?"
“Fuck” She could cum at the contact alone. “S-So wet.”
Jungkook snickers, slipping a finger deep inside of her and pumping it in and out slowly, moaning at the tight and hot feeling around his fingers. "Fuckin' wet and tight girl hm? Huh baby?"
“F-Feels good daddy” The sensual nickname slipped from her lips, making his ears ring at the sweet sensation of her voice.
Jungkook groans at that nickname, thrusting his finger in and out of her faster now. "Shiiit, baby, you know I love it when you call me that."
He then pulls his fingers out, sucking them clean. “Love the way you taste. Needed that for years.”
“C-Can’t take it” She whimpered at the feeling of his retracting fingers.
Maybe it had been too long for her. By herself it took a good amount of work for her to get off but this was ruining her in seconds.
Jungkook smirks at that, pulling his pants down, his already hard length flopping out. "You’re gonna take it good baby?”
“Daddy please—“
“Is that all you got?" Jungkook taunts, teasing her entrance with his tip. "Beg some more, or you ain't getting this dick."
His dominant and demanding voice was coming back into play, almost better than what she remembered.
“Want it so bad. I’ll take it good, I promise.” Her voice cried, “So desperate.”
Jungkook groans at her begging, slowly pushing inside her. "Mmm fuck— so damn tight, just like that baby.”
“Take Daddy's dick." Him fully entering into her in a slow, but deep pace.
Her chest rose as he slid inside her. She swallowed, adjusting herself to his length.
Jungkook smirks at her reaction, gripping her hips as he begins to thrust in faster, a low moan leaving his lips.
“Missed this wet ass pussy” He stared her down. “You miss that, baby? How Daddy fucks you like this?"
“Y-Yes”
“Fat ol’ ass and huge ass tits— And a pretty face. God, you're so fucking hot." Jungkook grunts, picking up the pace, thrusting harder and faster.
The sound of skin on skin filling the room, making sure to hit that sweet spot. "This what you wanted, huh baby?
“All I-I wanted— all I needed.” She whined out. “Fucking amazing.”
“I thought I was desperate." Jungkook growls, slapping her ass hard. “Such a pretty girl. Didn’t try to play me once.”
The room is filled with even louder wet slaps of his hips against her ass and his smacks. His thrusts becoming more erratic, his cock growing desperate for release.
“All for you, all yours. Been with no one but you.” She moaned, truthfully speaking.
"Good girl." Jungkook leans forward, nipping at her neck before whispering in her ear.
"Say my name, Y/n. Who's dick are you on?" He grips her throat.
“Fuck! Yours Daddy! Yours!” She was a mess on his cock, eyes rolling back.
“That’s my girl. All fucking mine.” He was watching as her body shudders from his touch.
He admired the way she was breaking down in front of him, going dumb on his dick.
The way her body twitched, he knew she was growing closer.
He watched her, clearly enjoying her lack of breath. The way she squirms, his to control and use.
"Gonna cum on daddy’s dick baby? Gonna let go for me?" He's almost there, wanting to finish strong.
“Want your cum— Need it.” She whimpered, eyes growing teary from the overwhelming pleasure. “Please daddy.”
“So fucking hard to say no to you." Jungkook snorts, pounding into her mercilessly. He was seeking his needed high so he could cum right with her.
The couple both reached their orgasms, moaning each other’s names before giving in and cumming together.
“Fuck— so in love with you.” Jungkook grunts, emptily filling her up. He catches his breath, panting with her.
She could hardly get out of the bed because of him, she was limp.
She was shuttering from her orgasm. Her legs were a trembling mess.
He watches her collect herself, loving the sight of her. The way she looks so used and satisfied, only at his hands.
Once she was all together, she got back in bed with him, kissing and chucking with him as the two panted together.
“I still got it.”
“Goddamnit Jungkook.” She hid her face. “Yes- you do.”
#jungkook#bts smut#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fic recs#jeon jungkook#jjk x reader#jungkook fiction#jimin and jungkook#bts jimin#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook fluff#bts jungkook#jimin bangtan#bts jeongguk#jeongguk x reader#jeongguk smut#jeon jeongguk#jeongguk fic#sub jjk#jjk angst#jjk x you#jjk spoilers#jjk smut#jjk fluff#jjk fanart#jjk#bts army#bts
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do you do headcanons? if so can I get all the batboys (all of age ones of course + Bruce) just getting the BEST head of their lives? like im talking, legs being held up by their partner as they suck the literal SOUL out of them? (Its 3 AM and I am very deranged) if not 100% okay. I just needed to get this idea out lol
𐕣 ⋮ Soul Mind And Body ⸝⸝ >ᴗ<
⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Hi Anon! I plopped down at my pc to write this the SECOND it came in. This is less headcannoney then I initially wanted it to be. I love writing smut I hope you enjoy ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ SMUT ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Mentions of calling reader 'Wife" AND 'Good Girl' ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Send In Requests!
JASON TODD Head so good he's gotta marry you
'Oh god…' Jason would do anything for that pretty face. You look so goddamn sweet seated in between his bulky thighs, the warmth of your bare hands, heat pulsing through your body into his like a current. His mouth, which would've been busy licking and devouring those pretty lips, falls open with another moan as you swipe a finger over his tip, teasing him. He grips your hair tighter in a warning gesture. Your head drops forward, a satisfied sigh leaving your lips pressing wetted lips to the head of his shaft, your eyes falling shut. He knows that letting his guard down around you is his vice, his weakness, but right now he wants nothing more than to be swept up in the tide of your soft body and sweet soul. His fingers tighten in your hair, not quite holding on enough to hurt you, but firm enough to show authority. The thickness of his cock seems to take up each centimeter of your mouth and throat. "Shit… Birdie…" He mutters under his breath in relief at the sensation of your tongue at the base. Flattened beneath his length almost. He brings your head up letting out a strangled cry of pleasure. "Mmh.. Fuck. Don't look at me with those pretty fucking e-eyes…" He moans, gripping tightly at your hair again, forcing you to look at him. His hand reaches down to grip the edge of his bedding.
"N…nhg.. Shit-- " He grunts out, his whole body tense, every muscle strained, his dick throbbing. The way he's feeling it must be intense. It's a good thing your mouth was too occupied to tease about his sexed-out whines and groans when he spoke. "Fuck you're… fuck." He mumbles, bringing his hand to cover one eye, his other hand grasping your hair harder. His hips buck against you in an attempt to find release, to ease the tension. His voice is a rough rumble, his breath ragged from the exertion of thrusting upwards, the only movement he can manage for the moment, "God I gotta make you my wife.. h-huh? Hahaha.."He laughs, letting out an airy, desperate laugh. You let out a low hum, your throat vibrating against his dick.'Your husband.' You think, looking up into his eyes with lustful admiration and love, your tongue swirling around the head once before sliding back over it, sucking gently. You hear a shaky inhale come from him as he shudders. A loud gasp leaves him when he starts to climax. “Shit…” He pants. Gritting his teeth, letting out desperate little whimpers of frustration, his head falls back as he feels your nails dig deep into the flesh of his thigh as he spills out his seed, his cum hitting your tongue like a hot storm. He continues shuddering against you, panting, his hands dropping from your hair as his eyes flutter closed. He holds his breath for long moments until finally, his breathing slows to normal, the last vestiges of sexual energy seeping from him, his chest still rising and falling heavily against your lips.
DICK GRAYSON Hair puller
This was Dick's idea. The two of you pulled over on the side of the road on the outskirts of Gotham. The night is quiet. It's 2 or 3 am. The sky is clear and moonless, like a silver mirror. You can see all the stars clearly from here. You don't know what to do with yourself for a few minutes.
"Hey. Wanna try something?" He asks, grinning at you in the dim light of his car.
You smile back, unsure. "Okay."
He gently guides his hand to the back of your head, lowering yourself until you're semi-crouched above his groin. His fingers run down the sides of your neck to your shoulders before settling there, lightly pressing against your skin as he unzips his pants.
Then it starts. Your whole body relaxes instantly in response. This is not the first time this has happened between you two, but tonight seems different somehow. Your thoughts are a little fuzzy—your body tingles. You feel… safe with Dick.
"Come on pretty…" He cooes, pulling you closer into him as you pull his cock free from his pants. He moans quietly as your fingers brush his length, teasingly. He leans in so his lips touch the top of your had. "So sweet," he breathes, smiling at you through half lidded eyes as he pushes your head down to take him into your mouth. His hand runs up and down your back.
"God-! Yes.. Fuck me-- well.. y-you already got that c…covered.. huh? mng.. fuck." He moans as he jerks back harshly. He gasps loudly as his hips jolt up, black pubes tickling your nose and upper lip. His hands fist in your hair as he continues thrusting himself into your mouth. He lets out an involuntary cry as he feels your tongue swipe against his tip. A shiver runs down his spine as his orgasm builds. His entire body is rigid. "ah… good…… s' good….'" He pats at your head, awarding your actions with praise.
You let out a muffled noise, pleased. You continue to suck greedily at the base of his dick for several seconds. "Oh God…" he groans again, tugging gently on your hair, his hand tightening. "Don't stop…. I'm so close… ah…." He cries out as his hips jerk forward once more. The sound he makes is one of ecstasy as he comes, spilling into your mouth with a warm trickle. You release a small noise of satisfaction too before he pulls away. He smiles at you tiredly as his chest heaves. Your ears are ringing from the lack of sufficient air. "Good job, beautiful." He sighs.
BRUCE WAYNE Rough man mhmhm
Bruce has you, tonight. Sitting on a plushy pink velvet stool infront of his queen sized bed. A robe draped over your body like a goddess a silk sash tied loosely around your hips and secured in the back with a golden pin.
“Come here.” He drawls out your name like a promise that he means to keep. You don’t need to be told twice. Your legs feel wobbly as you walk closer to him, but they still hold firm as his hands cup your hips. “Look at me. Look at me properly,” he commands quietly. His hands slide down your sides to grip your waist. “Be a good girl and release all this stress for me hm?”
You bite your bottom lip and lean into his touch, pressing yourself against his chest. It's not hard to do. The gown is restrictive enough to make it difficult for you to move to touch yourself, but you manage. You are so focused on his every word that you don't even notice how he moves you inbetween his muscular legs, discarding his boxers.
“open your mouth.” It isn't until he speaks again that you understand what he wants you to do. “Now.” His fingers push into your mouth to force your lips apart. “Mmm, just like that.” He pulls your head down onto his cock. Your eyes sting from the sheer length and girth. He pushes you down further, using you like a toy. He’s lost in the pleasure himself.
“Mmh,, fuck—“ He groans through clenched teeth. His legs pinning you down, keeping you there while he rages in pleasure. “Fuckkk. You belong here with me- baby, keep going.. so good..” Bruce's hips thrust up, pumping into your mouth. The pain doesn’t register yet because all you can focus on is the way he’s pistoning. Hes whining, groaning, sobbing in pleasure. You’re doing this to him. He’s yours. His whole body shudders as he comes. His semen drips off of your chin, tears streaking down your cheeks.
“good… girl-..”
psst.. reblog and request for more...
#dcu#jason todd#batfam#batboys#batman#dc universe#dick grayson#jason todd imagine#jason todd x reader#smut dc#dc smut#dc hcs#dc comics#jason todd smut#tim drake smut#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson smut#bruce wayne#bruce wayne smut
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😭😭😭 I ENTERED THE VOID STATE AND IT'S LITERALLY CHANGED MY WHOLE VOCAL CORDS!!! Like, WHOA. 😱 You guys don't even understand. Before all of this, I was a mess. Lemme tell you the full tea.
So like, I used to cry at night, scrolling through Tumblr, seeing everyone else manifesting their dream lives while I was stuck in the same old cycle. 😩 You KNOW the feeling! I even DELETED my Tumblr at one point because I was SO sick of seeing everyone else actually living their dreams, but then I would redownload it like the next day because I couldn't resist!! And then...the whole studying-for-exams thing? LOL don't even get me started. Like, I'd be like "I'll just enter the void state before my exams and manifest straight A's or whatever" (spoiler alert: I didn't.) I'm never really failed any subjects. At least not badly😬
I was starting to get frustrated, right? So then, one day, I was like OKAY, FINE. TIME TO ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING. And that's when I started SATS (State Akin To Sleep). It sounded crazy at first, but honestly, I was down to try anything! (Even while coping with my MADD. Yes I'm one of them. No I'm never getting rid of it.) So I started visualizing my dream life, and LET ME TELL YOU, I GOT SO DETAILED. I was in Velaris with Rhysand (I'm an ACOTAR fan), feeling his WINGS!!! I was literally touching them and just imagining how amazing it would feel to be surrounded by magic and beauty. And I wasn't even thinking about entering the void or anything. I was just feeling the vibezzz. Like, I know that it felt real, and that's what mattered.
Fast forward to a month and 3 weeks of doing SATS (Yes, I skipped some days, but WHO CARES? 😤). And guess what happened? I woke up today, and BOOM! I was in the void! Like, I didn’t even need to know how it happened, it just DID. I just said "Anything i say comes true exactly the way I want it." I said it over and over and over. Until I decided it was enough. Then I thought of leaving, and I was back in my room. Thank goodness I didn't think of leaving when I first entered, because this was literally like a lifetime opportunity I couldn't screw it up.
I actually had to safeguard myself, by saying "I am not impulsive". And the urge to say nonsense just disappeared ✨ That was the first thing I said when I woke up. So I wouldn't say any crazy shit. And so I was sitting there, ready to just start manifesting everything I ever wanted. I even started writing my script. maybe that was just an adrenaline rush.
But here’s the thing...GUYS, NOW THAT I’M HERE....in my room with this "ability"...I’m actually kinda missing my old self. Not the sad, desperate me, but the me who was SUPER EXCITED about just wandering around Velaris at night and dreaming of all this happening. Like, I actually miss that excitement. Looking through Pinterest and seeing the interior of a mansion, and be like "I'll be there soon", seeing pics of tasty food on instagram and saying "I'll eat that soon" I know it sounds crazy, but when you finally get everything you thought you wanted, it’s like...IDK...a little too perfect? 😬
Like, I know this sounds wild— and weird, but it’s TRUE. It's true for me right now. I'm gonna be blunt. The success story is not as exciting when you’re like actually living it, you know? Or maybe it's just me. Like, I’m just over here typing this at 4 AM, feeling kinda melancholic. And kinda (scared). Yes, I wanna enjoy my desires, but... I don't know. I don't want to get too curious and stray from Velaris trying to find out the secret behind ALL of this. For goodness sake, this is crazy!!! My voice is a genie!. It's already bugging me now. I know, I KNOW, this is probably not what you expected from a success story, but I’m being REAL.
I’ve written like 3 pages of my script so far, and I’m just gonna finish it tomorrow. No rush. Because honestly? Rhysand’s not going anywhere. 😉
And YOU can do this too. I know some of you might feel like “Oh, it’s impossible, I keep failing!” but like, just take a second and realize YOU'RE ALREADY GETTING CLOSER THAN YOU THINK. I was stuck too, and look where I am now. Don't look at the part where— I'm kinda ungrateful. But the part where I'm finally gonna meet Rhysand. YOU’RE SO CLOSE. It’s all coming together, trust me! 💖✨
But yeah, it’s 4 AM, I’m gonna go back to bed now, lol. Don’t let the void stress you out, okay? Take it easy. You’ve got this. ✨✌🏼
Also, love you kiwiii💖💖💖💖
SUCCESS STORY
XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GRL
First of all, I’m so happy for you and proud of you. You really put your foot down and gave yourself what you wanted.
I can understand what you mean when you say the success story isn’t exciting when you’re actually living it. But when it’s right in-front of you, it doesn’t feel like this out of reach thing you’ve put on a pedestal anymore. It’s just yours. And it feels normal.
But for some people, I think a big part of that came from the dopamine rush people would feel when they’d tell themselves that they’ll have it one day. And when they have it in the 3D, they just feel peaceful with it because there’s nothing to “chase” anymore.
I agree with most of what you said apart from “you’re so close”. With the law of assumption there is no process. You ARE the void. Anyway enjoy having your desires. I’m really happy for you!!😭 Love you too beautiful ♥️
#void state#void#law of assumption#loa tumblr#loassumption#loa blog#loablr#manifestation#loa#the void state#loa manifestation#void state success stories#void success story#loa success story#void success stories#void state success story
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