#but i don’t think anyone wants that lmao
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lorenzo berkshire: how a relationship would be with my favorite male manipulator <3
(@mattnott this came out of the chat we had the other day LMAO ily zoya)
on the surface, lorenzo berkshire is just that guy. he’s effortlessly charming, polite, intelligent, and the kind of person who could convince anyone he’s the perfect human being. he’s the type who walks into a room and immediately draws everyone in—not by being loud or flashy, but by knowing exactly how to make himself seem approachable, kind, and maybe even a little vulnerable. but all of it is just a mask.
enzo is a master manipulator. he knows exactly how to get what he wants, and he does it by making people think they’re in control. he doesn’t argue or beg; instead, he plants ideas like seeds in your mind. “if that’s what you think is best,” he’ll say with a soft smile, knowing full fucking well you’ll second-guess yourself. he makes you feel like every decision was yours, even though he’s been guiding you the whole time. and the worst part? you don’t even realize it until it’s too late.
emotional manipulation and guilt-tripping
enzo doesn’t argue outright, but he’s an expert at making you feel like everything is your fault. when you expresses your feelings or doubts about your relationship, he deflects and twists the narrative.
“you’re overthinking again, love. you always do this—it’s like you’re looking for reasons to fight.”
“after everything i’ve done for you, this is how you see me? it just doesn’t seem fair, babe.”
the constant emotional exhaustion of always questioning yourself and feeling like the villain slowly pushes you to the edge.
subtle isolation
enzo doesn’t tell you to stop seeing your friends or family straight up—that would be too obvious. instead, he plants seeds of doubt about them, turning you against the people who care about you.
“it’s just… don’t you think your friends don’t really understand you? they don’t see the real you like i do. they’re only here for a good time. they wouldn’t stick with you when things are hard, like i do.”
“your sister’s always been jealous of you. it’s kind of obvious when you think about it. in fact… i think i she was flirting with me at the lake trip last weekend…”
over time, you feel more and more alone, with enzo as the only person left in your corner—and even that’s suffocating.
his temper leaks through
enzo prides himself on being calm and composed, but even he can’t keep the mask on forever. when you push back—when you really challenge him—his anger surfaces.
“you think you’re better than me now? after all i’ve done just to make you happy? you should be grateful i’m still putting up with you. no one else would.”
“you don’t get to treat me like this. i deserve better than your constant doubts.”
while he doesn't resort to outright aggression, the quiet, cutting anger and emotional coldness are enough to make you feel small and utterly helpless against him.
hypercritical tendencies
at first, enzo is the type to shower you with compliments. but once he has you, the nitpicking starts. he frames his criticisms as “helping” you or “protecting” you, but they’re really about control. he wants to cut you down until his words are the only form of validation you trust; the only ones that matter.
“that dress is nice, but it’s not really your color, is it?”
“i just think you’d be happier if you didn’t spend so much time on things that don’t matter.”
it’s not that he truly thinks badly of you; it’s just his way of slowly implementing his control. the constant criticism erodes your self-esteem, making you wonder if you’re ever enough for him.
dismisses your autonomy
enzo frames his controlling nature as “taking care of you” or “looking out for you,” but it’s really about stripping away your agency.
he might make decisions for you without asking, like ordering for you at a restaurant or canceling your plans because he thinks you “needs rest.” you simply don’t get a say.
“i only did it because i know what’s best for you. you’d do the same for me if you cared as much as i do.”
over time, you realize you don’t have control over your own life anymore—and that terrifies you.
you start to feel like you’re losing your identity. the things you love—your hobbies, your friends, even your sense of self—have all been swallowed up by enzo’s world.
his fear of losing control turns ugly
when you start pulling away, enzo’s fear of losing you makes him tighten his grip. he might start tracking your whereabouts, showing up uninvited, or trying to manipulate you into staying.
“you’re not yourself lately, baby. i think you need me more than ever right now.”
“are you seriously leaving me after everything we’ve been through? i thought you were better than this. i thought you loved me—was it all a joke to you?”
his desperation exposes just how deeply insane, how utterly selfish he really is—and how dangerous it is to stay—but you still can’t help loving him.
the breaking point: seeing the mask slip
your breaking point comes when you finally see enzo for what he truly is. maybe it’s a moment of anger where his charm gives way to cold cruelty. maybe it’s realizing how isolated you’ve become or maybe it’s catching him in a lie.
“you know what? you’ll never find someone like me again. you’ll never find someone who loves you the way i do—or touches you the way i do.”
“go ahead and leave. but don’t come crawling back when you realize no one else will put up with you.”
and suddenly, the illusion you’ve clung to—the one where enzo is perfect, where his love is worth the pain—is shattered.
enzo doesn’t beg you to stay. no, he’s far more subtle. he sets the stage so that if you even think about leaving, the world around you becomes a constant reminder of him. your friends adore him. “enzo’s perfect for you,” they say, oblivious to his carefully crafted facade, oblivious to the fact that he doesn’t even want them within 50 feet of you. your family loves him because he’s gone out of his way to charm them. “he’s such a gentleman,” your mom gushes after he brings her flowers for no reason at all.
and when you confront him? he doesn’t argue. he doesn’t yell. instead, he sighs, looking at you with those soft, sad eyes. “i just wish you’d trust me,” he says, and suddenly you’re the one apologizing.
and enzo’s love isn’t love—it’s obsession. he doesn’t just want to be with you; he wants to consume you. he integrates himself so deeply into your life that it feels impossible to untangle yourself from him.
he’ll listen to all your favorite songs and tell you how much he loves them too. “this one reminds me of you,” he’ll say, and suddenly, every melody feels like it belongs to him.
he’ll watch all your favorite shows, quote them back to you, and make inside jokes so that even your comfort series becomes a part of his web.
he’ll charm your friends and family until they’re all on his side. “you’re lucky to have him,” they’ll say when you confide in them. and if you ever leave? they’ll tell you you’re making one of the biggest mistakes of your life.
“i just don’t understand,” he’ll say if you call him out. “everything i’ve ever done was for you. because i love you.”
and here’s the thing about enzo: even when he’s truly, deeply in love, he’s still toxic. love doesn’t magically make him a better person—it just changes the way he manipulates you. instead of using his charm to pull you in, he’ll use his insecurities to keep you there. “i don’t know what i’d do without you,” he whispers, and it sounds more like a warning than a confession. almost like he’s saying he’d become worthless without you.
but love does soften him in some ways. his need for control isn’t about power anymore; it’s about fear. he’s terrified of losing you, so he holds on tighter. he’s still manipulative, still controlling, but now it’s because he genuinely believes he can’t live without you.
enzo’s love is messy and overwhelming. it’s the kind of love that makes you feel like you’re drowning, but at the same time, you can’t imagine living without it. and that’s the tragedy of lorenzo berkshire: no matter what he does, you can’t help but love him anyway. even when you see his true colors, you’re already too far gone.
© leona-hawthorne 2025. please do not copy, translate or repost any of my writing.
navigation. masterlist. lorenzo berkshire masterlist.
#lorenzo berkshire#slytherin boys#lorenzo berkshire x you#lorenzo berkshire x reader#enzo berkshire#enzo berkshire x you#enzo berkshire x reader#enzo berkshire x y/n#lorenzo berkshire fanfic#slytherin#harry potter#louis partridge#character analysis#lorenzo berkshire x female reader
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dude i love jayce so much it’s a problem like AHHH i wanna request sum fluff but i literally don’t care what it’s abt i js want him bro. like it can be domestic shit or like whatever LMAO i’m so bad at doing requests but i love how u write
T-T
I LIKE THE BEARD… - JAYCE X READER
synopsis: your lovely boyfriend Jayce has changed his look as he's gotten older. His hair has gotten longer, messier; and he’s grown a wonderful beard. He wants to get rid of it. You say otherwise.
warnings: Jayce is hot, fluff fluffy fluff, appreciating Jayce, Jayce getting flustered, some insecurities mentioned, pre-established relationship, man I don’t know this is fluffy self-indulgence that this anon and myself are craving, Grammarly is my beta
genre: m/f or m/m
p.s. Y'all don't understand how happy I am that people are requesting things and just talking to me in either my asks or my comment sections in my fics. Keep it up, love ya <3
Dating Jayce is a dream come true. You two have been friends for as long as you can remember. You've had a crush on him since you were both twelve; you're breaching into your thirties now.
He's always been a massive sweetheart, willing to help anyone out, incredibly smart, funny, witty, if a bit naive with a massive tunnel vision when he's inspired.
You love him with all your heart.
This new look has you blushing like a tween again, rather than you being his partner of almost five years.
Jayce isn’t a massive fan of it.
You can see it in the way he runs his fingers through his hair, or scratches his heavily stubbled cheek. You know he's only putting up with it for you. And you greatly appreciate that.
Jayce has always been handsome, but this… this elevated him to a whole new level.
So when you wake up one day, the other side of the bed cold, you know exactly where he is. He's contemplating how he looks in the mirror.
Judging every supposed flaw and imperfection he sees.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
You trudge your way over to the ensuite connected to your bedroom. Your hair is a mess, you quickly threw on one of Jayce's massive button downs, and you think your underwear is crooked.
With a light sniff, as you rub one of your eyes, you enter the bathroom and see Jayce; nitpicking his reflection in the mirror. His shaving kit is out. You feel a jolt of energy enter your body as your eyes widen.
“Sweetheart… what’s that?”
Jayce looks at you through the mirror and lightly shrugs, “My shaving kit. Gotta look presentable at the next council meeting.”
Your eyebrows furrow at that, “You were so proud of yourself when you first grew out your beard, then like a switch you didn't like it. What's going on in that big brain of yours?”
A sigh escapes the handsome man and his shoulders drop, “Some of the council members made comments about my new look. Something along the lines of me looking more like a ruffian than the Man of Progress.”
You want to throttle those council members.
You walk up behind Jayce, hugging his back and putting your chin on his shoulder, “Well I think you look even more handsome! You're not in your early twenties anymore Jayce. How you look and style yourself is going to change, it does for everyone! Do I still have the exact same look when I was in my early twenties?”
“No, you've changed a bit over the years.”
You run a hand through Jayce's longer hair and bring it down to his beard; the back of your hand caressing his face, “Your opinion matters most. Do you want to keep this new look, or do you want to shave it?”
Jayce looks into the mirror in a contemplative silence, before smiling at you and putting the shaving kit away.
“I like this look. Those council members can kiss my ass, they're just too lazy to make new posters and cups.”
You laugh at that, throwing your head back before kissing his shoulder. Jayce whirls you around and gives you a passionate kiss, he wraps his arms around you and lightly lifts you into the air. You wrap your arms around his neck.
“I love you, you know that?”
“I love you too.”
“You better, you're stuck with me for all eternity.”
You beam a grin at him, “I wouldn't have it any other way. Now, when's this meeting? Let's dress you up so nicely that those members choke on their own spit and hopefully die.”
“Babe! You can't say that!”
“Oh yes I can, they sure as shit can't hear me. We’re at home. What're they gonna do? Send in a swat team of enforcers and put me in Stillwater because I'm offended they made my wonderful, beautiful, sexy boyfriend upset! I don't think so!”
Jayce boisterously laughs as you drag him back to the bedroom, “The meeting is in about an hour and a half.”
You smirk, “Time to doll you up then.”
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
It honestly doesn't take that long to doll up Jayce. He's always been handsome.
You pull out his killer outfit. It’s an all-black ensemble with red accents. He's always looked so scrumptious when he wears it, and he knows it.
He gets dressed, puts a small bit of pomade in his hair so it loses its frizz, and sprays on some delectable cologne. There's almost fourty minutes left until he needs to leave.
He should've gotten ready a bit later. He's so gorgeous, you're itching to get your hands on him and ruin the work you two just did.
And he knows it.
He just keeps smirking at you, his dimples popping out each time. He lightly licks his lips, he even subtly poses for you. That bitch.
You walk up to him as he appreciates himself in the mirror (as he should) and squeeze yourself in between him and the dresser, you wrap your arms around his neck and fiddle with the collar of his shirt.
“Would it be so bad if you were… a little late to the meeting?”
Jayce looks at the clock on the wall, “Nah, we got time.”
Before you know it, he's picked you up and tossed you onto the bed. He quickly follows suit as you unbutton his top as he kisses your cheek and goes down to your neck.
Fuck those councillors who talked shit about your boyfriend. He's the most handsome man in the world, and you'll make sure he knows it everyday.
JAYCE WITH MESSY HAIR, A BEARD, AND THE ALL BLACK OUTFIT WAS MY DOWNFALL IN S2. WHY DID HE ONLY HAVE IT FOR O N E SCENE ISTG WHY DID THEY DO THAT?!?? PAPA ME WANT MORE MOVIE 🫴🫴
#arcane#jayce arcane#jayce talis#arcane imagine#arcane x reader#jayce imagine#jayce x reader#fem!reader#male!reader#gender neutral reader#banners by cafekitsune#anon ask#asks open#send asks#ask me anything#bitchface24 7 asks
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tags via @sillystringstar
➥ would y’all believe me if i said i was a kohane oshi
🎤 day 328 🎵
➥ today’s akito is from the project sekai comic anthology chapter 20!!
#that tag was said completely as a joke bc i thought most people don’t read my tags#i also am not a huge fan of a subsection of akito fans that like to call him ugly / “bully” him constantly#like whatever at the end of the day they’re fictional characters do what you want#there are lots of times akito is made the butt of jokes and i think it’s extremely funny#there are times when i think the artists drew him in a way that does not Look Good#like i absolutely do “bully” my blorbos in the sense that i will project mental illness and trauma onto them and put them in situations#but there are some akito fans / fans of other characters#(and i should’ve said this before but this is a minority of people)#that i question if they like the character and tormenting them is just them having fun / projecting in some way#or if they just like to bully a fictional character because they feel like it can’t be bad if it’s not directed at a real person#<— wow damn i went off sorry yall#anyways i am dead serious kohane is probably my favorite character and i make her most special little guy in my aus#however much like how they treated me in gachas (kohane would not come home; akito would not stop coming home)#akito just broke into my brain and declared he lived there and since there was already a daily kohane i made the blog for pancake boy here#he’s definitely right up there as my second fav and gets special treatment bc this blog (and bc i love his voice / comms)#but kohane is my number 1 lmao#akito posting#anyways probably should have typed this to put under a cut instead of in tags but oh well#i have no clue why this post in particular is getting attention and comments#the power of ena screaming at akito for eating her special cheesecake ig#others posts#sillystringstar#where’s the tag for mod yapping#anyways to anyone who read this far hi 👋 🌌
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𝐀𝐎𝐓 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒!
my fave anime/manga omg I’ve been wanting to write for it for a while but I’ve had no idea where to start but then I was like ‘I should probably start the way I start everything else lol HEADCANONS!!’
so here’s some Relationship + Random hc’s of some of my favorite AOT characters! If you want a part two or a specific character added in the next one, lemme know!
Featuring: Eren, Armin, Mikasa, Jean, Levi, Hange, and Erwin
𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧
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An amazing soldier, but a dumb boyfriend
Like, on the field, fighting, he’s brilliant
its not to say he’d be a terrible boyfriend
im just saying he’d have no idea what to do half the time
like if ur upset he’s just like “um don’t cry 🧍”
*awkwardly pats ur back*
but he’s pretty much clueless otherwise
as you can tell in the series, he’s not good at processing his emotions
and if he thinks he can’t process his OWN emotions, just wait till he tries to process yours
ngl tho it would get to a point where he’s so good at understanding you and how you’re feeling that it’s like ‘stfu Eren you’ve got ur own problems’
like bros so invested in just TRYING that he pushes his own emotions to the side
on a random note
he snores like crazy
if he’s not awake that is bc if he’s awake he’s like being silly at fuckin 1 AM
either talking with Armin, or just yapping
or maybe practicing melee moves in the middle of the floor
or working out
Or snacking
you get the idea
hes also a chocoholic bye-
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𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐬𝐚
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sweetest shyest pookiest gf ever
shes got so much emotional depth, but she has a hard time expressing it
but when she does
shell tell you the sweetest thing ever
or like give you the most thoughtful compliment you’ve ever recieved in ur life
and then she’ll get shy and run away
not only she’s like ‘omg why did I say that’
buts she’s also like ‘oh god I probably made them uncomfortable was that weird?’
and then u reassure her like ‘nah that was actually the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me’
and verbally she’s like ‘oh ok 🙂’
but internally she’s like ‘yay 🙂’
on a random note
when she’s nervous in public cos there’s a lot of people
shell subconsciously hold ur hand
it’s not like she’s like scared, bc u know she’s Mikasa
but big crowds make her anxious and the noise gives her a headache
so most times she just prefers hanging out somewhere quiet
like a boba shop or a library
And I also hc that she’s actually really good at drawing and has this sketchbook that she carries with her and draws in when ur at boba shops
And while you’d think it was full of quick doodles it’s actually all ART. (maybe I should do hc’s on each characters art styles if they have one lmao)
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𝐀𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧
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this Barbie is a sweetie pie bitch
honestly he carries the dates tho
and by that i mean he’s PLANNING THEM ALL MONTHS IN ADVANCE
freakin loid forger ahh
he’s got most of it written down but he’s also still got some date ideas stored in that big head of his
bc he’s an over thinker and an over achiever so he wants to like maximize the experience ig
like a nerd 🤓
(im sorry im bullying him i swear i love him)
so he plans all these dates, and everything is going well until he’s actually on said date with you
bc he rehearsed a few little one liners and flirtations for weeks on end but upon seeing you he immediately forgot them 😅
so he’s a stuttering blushing mess the whole time
freakin cutie
random hcs
he hates spicy food
it literally makes him cry
but he also doesn’t really like sweets much
so he usually resorts to really simple foods or something savory
basic like him (I’m sorry)
I also hc that he’s self conscious about his forehead (same bro)
hence the thick bangs lmao
but yk what big head big think is what I always say
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𝐉𝐞𝐚𝐧
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everyone knows he’s respectful
A true gentleman
but if you recall that scene with Mikasa in the cadet corps
He’d also be super nervous around u
blushing and smiling
(Ohh my god my heart)
he tries so hard to play it cool
but no amount of flirting and smirking can hide the fact that he’s stuttering and blushing like an idiot
and oh god if you flirt back
he’s like actually gonna pass away 🫠
and I am too bc he’s so cute
random hcs
he talks in his sleep
hes a thigh guy
hed walk on the outside of the sidewalk w u unprompted
he’s reaaaally good at impressions
he once did a killer impression of captain levi
and everyone laughed until they spotted Levi a little ways behind him
and then they had to hold back their laughter while Levi yelled at him for it 💀
he once tried to cut his own hair growing up
and it was so bad that his mom ended up shaving his head
He swears he looked handsome w it tho
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𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢
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omg this man
no one would ever know you two were together
except for Hange, Miche and Erwin bc they sniff out this shit like crazy
but when yall are alone
he holds your hand like all the time
hes super clingy
but won’t admit it
like
hes laying on top of you with his arms and legs wrapped around you like a koala
and he’s like “you’re so clingy y/n 🙄”
random hcs!
we know he doesn’t sleep
but what’s weirder is when you wake up and he’s just staring at you
”hey”
and scares the shit outta you
like Jean he walks on the outside of the sidewalk unprompted
and he’s also a sidewalk karen
like if someone else is walking by he’s giving them a look like “try and move me bitch”
”you can’t”
My stronk scary boi
And because he’s old as rocks I also hc that he probably knits as a hobby
idk why, but I can absolutely see him knitting scarves and shit for Eren and the others (and u ofc)
like its winter and everyone is training and he’s out here passing out scarves he made 😭
Hanged like ”where’d you get all these scarves Levi?”
and he’s just like “mind your damn business”
and his ears get pink when he’s embarrassed so that kinda answers the question
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𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞
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AHHHHH
as a Hange Kinnie I’m not projecting whatsoever 😌
but they’d totally be clingy
in like the most extroverted way
yapping about you to everyone
till Levi tells them to shut up
They’re out there fighting titans like “you know y/n usually kills titans like this”
and Levi’s like “Y/N IS RIGHT OVER THERE”
Brings u pretty rocks
cant flirt to save their life but it’s the thought that counts 😌😌
random hcs!
asks the most random and way too personal questions
“I’m not gonna dignify that with a response” said a shocked and disgusted Levi
Hange absolutely points out animals they see
like, in the middle of a fight they’re just like “CAPTIAN LEVI Y/N!!”
and you both look over scared bc you think Hange is hurt
and they’re just like “LOOK THERES A SQUIRREL! 🤩”
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𝐄𝐫𝐰𝐢𝐧
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we know he’s a gentleman
and I see so many ppl making him out like he’s “daddy”
to which I say
Nah
hes ‘father figure’ 😌😌😌
he’d actually be an amazing partner though
buys you flowers on a regular basis
dates might not be as often
hes a busy man you know 😏
but he definitely treats you to a date whenever he can
if you’re self conscious
no you’re not 😶
he’s got the most random, deliberate, sweetest, kick your feet and giggle compliments stored up for you
and he’ll tell you all of them if it makes you feel better about yourself
random hcs
another loud as fuck snorer I fear
but that’s heard on the occasion that he actually sleeps
bros obviously a workaholic so
he also forgets to eat
you and Levi have to remind him
when he’s not on the job and completely focused
hes actually kind of scatterbrained and loses random stuff like “where are my glasses” and they’re on his head 💀
he’s so old istg I love him so much
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#eren aot#aot#levi aot#aot x reader#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#eren yeager#eren jaeger#eren x reader#eren jeager#hange#armin#eren headcanons#armin aot#armin arlert#armin x reader#snk armin#eren#jean kirschstein#mikasa#armin headcanons#mikasa ackerman#mikasa aot#mikasa x reader#mikasa x you#mikasa headcanons#jean kirstein#jean x reader#jean headcanons#aot levi
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Offseason Thoughts!!
ok i know a lot of people are dreading this offseason because it’s going to be Long it’s going to be Dramatic, but honestly i’m so here for it. like lowkey i love this time of year because really it’s the time for completely unbridled optimism in a lot of ways. if we do A, B, and C, who’s to say that that doesn’t fix the team and we win the super bowl next year? you literally can’t know for sure that it WON’T work!! (i didn’t say it was a time for realism, i said optimism, perhaps delusionally so 🥲)
plus i’m just genuinely interested in all the roster building stuff. figuring out contracts and how those might work, free agency, the draft and everything that those things entail - love it! all about it! so if you’re a sicko like me who IS into all of this (and i completely understand if you aren’t because it WILL be exhausting) i thought i’d make a little overview about the things we’ll be dealing with over the next several months.
Here is a list of all the internal free agents we are going to have to make decisions on, along with their expected cost and the likelihood of us keeping them
^Here is our expected cap space for the next few years (taking into account expected cuts like Rankins, Hubbard, and Cappa) plus some extra commentary.
as you can see, we have MORE than enough cash and cap space to be very aggressive this offseason. will we be? it’s certainly not in our reputation to do so, but they HAVE been making baby steps over the last few years to catch up to the modern nfl. the most recent example of which is firing coaches like lou before their contracts are up! very uncharacteristic of the brown family. and i think this reflects rumblings you hear on twitter that the organization is frankly embarrassed at how this season went (rightfully so). so i think you can expect they will do SOME things to reflect this urgency, even if it’s not as much as we’d like them to do.
the biggest decisions to be made: what do we do about tee?? what do we do about trey?? and then of course extending ja’marr, which i don’t think is a decision at all for anyone, but they’ve gotta decide how to do it to make both sides as happy as possible, when they struggled with that right up to the first game last season 😭
Tee: obviously if you’ve been following this blog you know i want to keep tee. i think we can pull it off and i think it will be beneficial to the team long term. but there is an argument to be made regarding his durability/injuries and whether the resources we’d spend on him would be better spent elsewhere like on fixing our historically bad defense. however, to that i say that we’re actually already one of the biggest spenders in terms of cap space on defense, and it didn’t help at all lmao. once we get rid of people like sheldon rankins and sam hubbard, who are definitely no longer worth the value of their contracts, we will free up a significant portion of the cap and use it to find better value free agents that can help us. the strategy going from overpaying for bad players to paying average amounts for average players. because with a top 5 offense like we had this year, we truly only need an average defense, unlike the HISTORICALLY bad one we had this year!
(now a caveat to this is if the bengals would actually show they’re willing to go all out and spend BIG on the BEST defensive free agents, then perhaps that’s worth more than keeping tee. but the only thing with that is that i just don’t believe the bengals would do it either way. even in 21 when we fixed our whole defense with free agency, we still did it by acquiring a bunch of smaller name value free agents, who ended up performing far above what the market thought they would. and i imagine that will be the strategy by the FO whether we keep tee or not.)
you can also say that a large part of our FO’s failure the last few seasons has been that we aren’t keeping our Known Talents. we drafted and developed jessie bates into a star, and then we let him go because we thought we could easily replace his value for cheaper in FA and the draft….and three years later safety is still a huge hole on our roster. DJ Reader is another example of a key player for our team that we thought we could replace and we failed dramatically. looking at tee, who is the replacement we have in line? jermaine?? for SO MANY reasons that is no longer a viable plan lmao. Someone in FA? this is a weak FA class. so we’d let tee walk and then probably end up overpaying for a lesser talent? what’s the point of that? okay maybe we draft a WR high to replace tee? well i’m hearing that it’s also not a great WR draft. and to expect a first year rookie to come in and offer even half of what tee does is also not a super sound strategy! (not to mention we’d have to spend a high draft pick that should probably be used on defense!)
tag tee? maybe! but i don’t think it’s as likely as extending him at this point. the second tag will be expensive (i think over 25k? maybe 26k) and that takes up a big chunk of our cap space if that’s what we’re worried about. plus it will piss off tee, to be tagged twice and not given the benefit of being able to get a long term deal? with his injury history especially? players hate that shit. i think it’s more beneficial for both parties to just do an extension at that point if we want to keep him. you can spread the cap hit out easier for the team, and tee won’t have to worry about his long term security as much.
ANYWAY this got long, honestly tee should have just been his own post lmao. but this situation is deifnitely the most interesting to me and seeing how it goes will be FASCINATING.
Trey: he requested a trade last offseason because he knows that his current contract is significantly less than he deserves for the value he offers (and that was BEFORE he got first team all pro and led the entire nfl in sacks this season, oh god 🥲) we have him under contract, but would he be willing to play under it? or would he retire like he threatened to? i’m honestly not sure, and i hope it doesn’t come to us finding out. we need to keep our star players happy, which means we need to figure something out here. do we extend him? he just turned 30, which the FO always frowns upon when it comes to extensions lol BUT he also just had his best year? i don’t think even our idiotic FO could say that just because his age starts with a 3 now means he’ll be washed next season or even the season after. what i’m seeing on twitter is that he’s expected to get at least one more deal of 2-3 years. and looking at the age of elite edge guys in the league, i think that that’s fair! and if you ask me, completely and totally worth it to keep trey. i mean jesus, who do we even have on defense if we lose him?? i think this one is a no-brainer, we’ve gotta offer him an extension for more money and i think he’d still be willing to take a reasonable deal to stay.
Ja’Marr: oh my god. i’m still filled with SO MUCH RAGE when i think back to how CLOSE we were to getting him signed last offseason. we were RIGHT THERE. all the rumors were saying it was basically a done deal!! all the numbers and years were agreed upon!!! but our cheap-ass FO couldn’t just get over themselves and structure the guarantees to match how most deals are done in the rest of the league!! they showed they’re willing to do a modern structure for Joe, they need to show they’re willing to do it with the rest of our stars. especially our first team all pro triple crown winning stars!! jesus christ!!!
the only thing that offers me some comfort is that ja’marr is still on the same path, contract-wise, as Justin Jefferson. they also couldn’t get over the hump before his fourth year even when both parties wanted to, and he ended up signing a massive contract in june the next year. i’m hoping that we can accomplish the same on a similar timeline because oh my god i do not need all the drama of ja’marr missing training camp again! and when you look at all the other WRs up for an extension this offseason (garrett wilson probably the only one who even comes slightly close to ja’marr’s level), i think it’s fair to say that ja’marr is setting the market whenever he signs. then like with justin’s last year, the other WRs will all sign slightly below. so i’m hoping hoping hoping that there’s no motivation on either side to drag this out. but of course, we’ll see!!
and then we’ve gotta think about the lesser free agents like Mike G, Mike H, BJ, Germaine…i have no idea what we do with them. i’d like to retain Mike G…..the three defensive vets i dunno! they’re good locker room leaders…mostly? they’re still solid if not losing a step. should we bring them back for reasonable vet deals? probably?? can we find better value in FA?? i’m honestly not sure. like you don’t want to lose these guys but it’s also hard to say that we should keep them at all costs when you look at the defensive performance last year. i just don’t know here. i’d hope we keep at least one of them? BJ maybe being the most important in my eyes?
there’s so much more to talk about honestly but i’ll stop yapping for now! what do you guys think we should do?? i’d love to hear your thoughts!
#fair warning this is mostly yapping about tee and all the possible things that could happen with him#and i didn't even mENTION the most important thing probably#being that joe has repeatedly explicitly and publicly demanded the FO to sign him#so like. they should NOT want to risk pissing off their star franchise QB!!#the rest of it...man i dunno.#i might make some polls lol?? see what the rest of you guys are thinking about some of these free agents#god this is long i'll be shocked if anyone reads the whole thing but i just wanted to organize my thoughts going into the offseason#who cares about the playoffs we've gotta figure out trey's contract structure!!!#cincinnati bengals
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One element of Aizawa's relationship with L is that Aizawa is really the only person who can call him out and get away with it. If Soichiro says something L can claim he's biased. If Light does it, he can claim that's what Kira would say. If Matsuda does it, he can say he's stupid. Mogi doesn't really criticize L in any instances I can remember, so Aizawa is the one voice of dissent he can't dismiss.
HMMM okay i will disclaim that i’m thumb-typing this at 1 a.m. so please correct me if there are any blatant lies in the following:
while lawzawa is based and possibly the realest death note ship i tend to think of soichiro and L’s relationship better than that. L never calls him biased about his son, and in soichiro’s defense that’s because he isn’t biased! or well, he is, but soichiro’s reaction to his son’s guilt being in question is to ask L to bring out all the big guns and cover the yagami house in cameras (the surveillance is L’s idea but soichiro specifically requests he be thorough). like soichiro wants to see his son’s innocence cleared in the most… i don’t know how else to say this… the most obsessive and compulsive way possible. light’s potential for guilt is literally an intrusive thought for him. he puts himself in jail because he’s so scared that he’ll turn dangerous if he sees light in confinement for a second longer. (and this carries on into second arc, soichiro keeps subconsciously doubting light until he’s on his goddamn death bed, etc, but this isn’t about that.) and L recognizes this about him! L never claims that soichiro is biased, it’s always soichiro literally doing everything he can to prove light’s innocence in the least biased way possible! i know your statement was “L can claim he’s biased” but i truly don’t think L would ever go for that, just because it is blatantly untrue.
also hmm i’m having trouble remembering any times matsuda has dissented to L’s face? (he goes off and does all sorts of wild shit on his own yeah, but i don’t remembering him disagreeing with L’s plans ever.) but admittedly i have terrible memory re: the task force so i’ll let anyone who remembers better than me chime in on that one lmao
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If we reach 8k on tt before the year ends I’ll draw pre crash c/urly thirst art idfk
#tried thinking of art ideas that in no normal circumstance I would ever draw#but i don’t think anyone wants that lmao#most likely the goal is unreachable WAHOOOOO
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if the only time you bring up A Secret Third Thing is when someone has suggested generally celebrating or uplifting platonic/queerplatonic fictional relationships in spaces that ordinarily obsess about romantic ones to the exclusion of all else perhaps consider why you’re doing that and also stop.
#gav gab#im tired lmao#‘i think platonic relationships are worthy of celebration too’#‘BUT WHAT IF THE NATURE OF THE RELATIONSHIP DIDNT MATTER IT WAS JUST THE DEVOTION WHAT ABOUT A SECRET THIRD THING!!!’#cant help notice you never do this when romance is being discussed#:)#cant help notice you only bring this up when people want to be specific about enjoying SPECIFICALLY platonic or queerplatonic dynamics#wonder why that is :)#wonder what you actually mean is you want to change nothing about how you prioritize relationships#and also escape any kind of challenge to that#rather than just owning that you don’t fucking care about platonic or queerplatonic dynamics#which is whatever just please be straight up about it#let’s not do this wink wink theatre please#TO BE CLEAR this is not about any time anyone uses the phrase ever#please don’t come at me for that im not saying The Whole Phrase is inherently bad#just that ive noticed some patterns in when people use it and what brings it up
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I know The Founders Cut, generally, is the edited scrubbed over version of genloss from Showfall in-universe (as well as a not-8-hour-long-three-stream-binge-night whenever we want to watch it again) but something that struck me as odd and I haven’t seen anyone mention yet, is this warning
It shows up right at the junction where the third act starts, where it appears the Hero is breaking free of Showfall thanks to Hetch. But here’s the thing, while a LOT less than the previous acts the audience still played a significant role in this act, even when really only given two audience interaction choices. Which makes me wonder, how real is this warning, and who is it for? Obviously the audience involved knows what happens past this point, but the audience is also implied to be an integral part of the Social Experiments, which is part of why things start to tweak out when the Founder removes them in the Founder Cut as the Generation Loss generation loses.
My first thought, was that obviously this is another bait and switch, a way to draw the audiences attention, seeing something that’s secret, something that’s not “meant for them”, which is a tactic I could see Showfall using in universe to keep people’s attention and add an air of mystery to their shows.
But
Showfall is doing all their experiments and these shows with a LOT of help from their censors to show it off, displaying a fun silly show that is definitely not uber fucked up and that is 100% just slime don’t worry about it, it’s kid friendly if it’s green! And I don’t think they’d want to bet all their cards on this one experiment doing well enough to their audience to not question the sudden shift in tone that follows this warning. Which makes me wonder.
They did their test, they did their experiment, and the evidence of this last act? I think it was a one time run, they don’t want anyone seeing this, it isn’t for the audience. Act three is specifically to both test and play with their Hero, Hetch’s new lines add a level to this, never once does he call the Hero by their name, just refers to Ranboo as their Role, and he’s not exactly. Nice? About literally any of Ranboos concerns, which wouldn’t really seem conductive to making an audience trust him, especially with his monologue at the end. Ranboo has escaped before, possibly right before act 1 started, they tightened the security on his mask to be unremovably part of them, Hetch doesn’t like the Hero but they’re a fan favorite so he can’t just get rid of them.
Act three is the cumulation of Ranboo being punished for things they don’t remember, for daring to break free from Showfalls control, this is Hetch taking the Hero and essentially majorly fucking and manipulating them to take his frustration out on a fan favorite they can’t otherwise get rid of or give a smaller role like Slimecicle. which is exemplified by the fact that we now know Charlie most likely was never able to actually able to fully snap out of the control, that even in act three in panic and confusion there was at least still a part of him being influenced by Showfall.
So the first two acts are the usual show, they have their posters, they have Squiggles to introduce them, they have goofs and silliness and only a couple slip ups that’re quickly dealt with, the usual rose tinted curtains. Act three?
Do not watch the following material
#or Showfalls just bein silly goofy and pretending they’re letting us in on a secret that isn’t one and playing off the reveal of#what they’re up to as just another plot of a show and hey that isn’t real don’t worry it#but I also think Hetch is really truly throwing Ranboo around like a ragdoll for more than just audience entertainment during act three#I think it could tie in to Chronicle Zero though. if Zeros dreams are connected to what happened to Ranboo then she knows something#Showfall would have a vested interest in her. not in fact. knowing that#and maybe trying to make her not know about any it anymore in a very Showfall kinda way#I’m less versed in what’s going on with Chronicle Zero tbh but I’m tryin. I fuckin love Gen loss#robot rambles#generation loss#genloss#Ranboo#I’m doin the thing where I ramble but it’s my blog I do what I want here#and I’m having hard life stuff happen irl rn so I’m clinging to genloss because it brings me joy and the timing of the FC was super helpful#also if anyone was curious I think Hetch is a bitch but I do acknowledge the possibility of him also being controlled#and I don’t think we’ve seen the last of him#but that’s stuff for not-in-this-post lmao#I had a theory tag at some point but imma be so fr I Do Not Remember what it was
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honestly i just dont get why sometimes people get all weird about quadrants and insist they’re unhealthy always no matter what
like yeah im not stupid i know they CAN be fucked up and can be weird and toxic but so can any romance. human romance has been toxic and fucked up for me many times. tbh if we take a step back and just look at the basic ideas of all of them i don’t think any of those have to be evil and terrible necessarily
like oh no me and my boyfriend have a fun rivalry that we both like being in and both agreed to where we have fun competing with each other and talking shit and then make out! FUCK!!! that’s horrible i would NEVER want that! i would never be guilty of forcing my boyfriend to play tetris with me over and over and insulting him the entire time
oh no my boyfriend has anxiety and i calm him down! oh god we like cuddling and talking about feelings! we both agreed we like this relationship dynamic and feel fulfilled by it! AAA SCARY!!! GET SCARED!!!
oh no sometimes my boyfriends are both annoying and i voluntarily get between that and make people be less annoying! FUCK!!!!!!!! we are going to DIVORCE!!!
#it’s cool if you don’t personally want any of those things#and yeah#alternia is fucked up#big fucked up murder planet#they love insane fucked up rules that are bad for everyone#but idk i feel like all romance is kind of fucked up#and you usually always have to do an insane amount of work to make it healthy and normal lol#and none of these dynamics by necessity HAVE to be horrible#you don’t HAVE to only rely on your moirail and not talk to your friends about your feelings#you don’t HAVE to get fucked up with your kismesis#you don’t HAVE to be a sad unfulfilled auspistice who kinda gets pushed into the relationship#if i’m thinking about the dynamics purely just as concepts#none of that shits a requirement#idk if this makes any sense to anyone else lmao#i just mean like#i don’t think any of those things are uniquely terrible i guess not in any ways that human romance isn’t#and people manage to have ok human romances all the time#not as often as they should lmao#but sometimes#so why not quadrants#i can get being uncomfortable with them#they’re weird#and definitely more complex than i went into in the post#but i don’t think they’re uniquely terrible
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batfam as things i and others have said pt 4
(these make me so happy so id be expecting them for a while)
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dick after getting bit by mosquitoes: it looks like a vampire with bad dental hygiene bit me
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jason after drinking straight from the tap: whys dad offended at what water i use? he’s second hand offended. mates out here making new emotions
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tim: the computer showed me things I didn’t wanna see
bruce: she showed you the truth?
tim: she showed me the future
alfred: do i need to get you two help
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the rest of the family: talking about normal life things
jason, tim and damian: talking about how they’d survive a zombie apocalypse
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jason: im playing with death here
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dick: i got an evi- email today
jason: you got an evil email?
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cass to steph while trying to flirt: you have such eyes
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pt 1 pt 2 pt 3
#jason todd#batfam#dick grayson#tim drake#dc#damian wayne#bruce wayne#also crazy of me but context for the playing with death one i was trying to flirt with thanatos in hades no life or death situations here#alfred pennyworth#stephanie brown#cassandra wayne#stephcass#also tim and bruce are basically me and my dad lmao#and i will answer if anyone ever wants context which I don’t think people will but it’s really funny sometimes#also cass got that tism rizz#i never thought id say that but yes#and me headcanoning jason as having adp is back b!tches
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fat bodies are so fucking beautiful. Like we really are God’s most divine creation I think.
#🪷—faerie whispers#no hate to anyone else#before we get started and get to tussling#I think everybody is beautiful and deserves love#I just really think plus size ppl deserve the world#like I refuse to let the internet and the world’s nasty fatphobia convince me otherwise#idk if any of y’all follow juicy body goddess but I love her channel sm#the way she speaks life into plus size ppl#it’s so beautiful#it’s never been ‘confidence’ that has allowed me to wear the things I do or cosplay as characters who don’t share the same body type#I just legit loved my body and fuck whoever didn’t tbh lmao#i also never felt the need to bash skinny ppl in the process#I just could care less abt them bc I don’t center them at the forefront of my beauty standards#like a chubby fat femme can get whatever they want from me#like have my life if u want it fr#and a plus size man?#yeah 2 sum to do sum with me sorry
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i miss carpisuns sometimes </3
#not necessarily that I regret switching over but i just get like nostalgic for an earlier time in the ml fandom#s3 was soooo much fun for me#and the long hiatus before s4 was also the best. so good wasn’t ready for it to end when it did haha#things just feel so different in the fandom now#both the fandom has changed and I have changed#and of course the STORY has changed#and I like don’t know what to do about that or how to react#cause I am used to being one of the guys who is defending ml’s honor with my life lol#committed to spreading positivity#and I still want to be that guy!#but it’s like. idk. I don’t recognize this story anymore#this isn’t the same story that I fell in love with years ago. but I don’t want to just like Leave??#I do want to see how things play out bc I am still invested in these characters#and I would love to still be part of the fan community and connect with people over a mutual love for this thing#that has been important to me for years and has inspired me to create and learn new skills and make new friends!#but I also don’t just want to shut up and pretend I’m happy about things I am decidedly unhappy about lol#like it’s honestly surprising to me that a only a small minority of the fandom seems to feel the way I do?#and the majority are still super pumped and frustrated at the people who are complaining#and really. I don’t WANT to rain on anyone’s parade. I honestly don’t#I was part of the parade for years! I had the best time in the parade! I don’t want to ruin the good time!#so i try not to be too salty on main ? but i feel like I’m going a little crazy lmao! like I’m just one bitter little miser fhdjjd#i mean i guess it’s kind of a good thing that I moved blogs tbh lol#cause now when i whine only a fraction of the people have to be exposed to it 😂#but man i hate knowing that people might think of me as a salter#I mean it’s valid if people are trying to have fun and do not want to hear my complaining haha#but also do i automatically have to be a salter. are the only options support and defend ml 100% at all times or Be A Salter#or can there be a third category of certified ml lover that is just disappointed in recent events & disagrees with the new writing direction#is that too much nuance for tumblr lol#see maybe that’s why I miss carpisuns. she didn’t have to ask this question. she was only full of LOVE!#but therein lies the irony…like marinette I have made this choice out of love…for what the story once was…what is to become of me now…
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hello :D please tell me more about your mezalian (is that how you spell it??) smalletho I will forever be indebted to you
(they are gorgeous I love them sm)
hey hi !! it would be my pleasure … (and I’ve been spelling it mezalean ??? but i have no idea LOL. there might be a canon spelling but i havent watched joels esmp1 since… probably since it ended. i will have to check sometime)
apologizing in advance because i will probably get very ramble-y!!
ummm. Oh god. How to start. Lets see. WELL. In this silly little au (i guess it has become a bit more than just me doodling designs LOL) in my head they have like this sort of zelink dynamic? obviously without all the zelda lore & stuff, just that kind of … okay forgive me I haven’t brushed up on my zelink lore for a good many years but. Like the princess and her personal knight that doesn’t really talk much sort of thing.
this made more sense in my head. But yeah. They have the vibes of zelink ? At least if i remember zelink right, I have a really bad memory :’) not exactly the same, i do think etho talks to joel (whereas if iirc link never really talks) - especially after getting to know him a bit - but just. they have the Vibes. You know?
I reckon Joel’s definitely very into sculpting in this au, maybe dabbles a little in painting - I imagine mezalea to be very heavy on art and expression in general. think you’d especially see lots of pottery and textiles all around the place. He probably also has an interest in some form of like. um. whats the word. Some sort of … fighting. lmao. Specifically thinking of fencing, i had this idea in my head that he’s watched Etho practice outside the palace at some point and is just absolutely fascinated and enamored. by both the practice and etho himself haha.
and for etho… talented swordsman? he is Not washed. i dont really have many ideas for his character in this au To be completely honest, mostly just of his personality. Although, I alsooo think he’s probably not actually from mezalea? I like to draw him with those pointy elf ears, and i think mezaleans are just humans. I cant remember if thats canon or not but um. mezaleans have human ears, so i’d imagine etho’s probably from like.. rivendelle? Is that. What it’s called. The elf guys? Are they elves??? Goodness I cant remember. Grimlands would make sense too since i THINK they’re kind of like. technical engineer guys? but i dont know what species they are um so ,,, yeah,,,,
i think joel’s probably a bit put off by etho at first, mostly just because he’s not super enthused about the idea of a personal guard, but also because the guys a bit odd, you know? but he’s also probably suuuper intrigued by him. he wants to figure this new guy out, and when they start talking a bit more, i think. They are both incredibly charmed by the other. head over heels? possibly.
most of my ideas of this au are just little scenes that are cute and silly but dont follow any main plot. I would love to write some one-shots of some of the ideas i have in the future, but as of right now im experiencing a bout of creative burnout and am busy with the holidays - spending time with family, so… not right now lol!
hopefully this is what you wanted,,,, i tend to get very ramble-y when talking about literally anything, so i do apologize for that haha, i am Not good at explaining things in simple ways, as i’ve said many a time before.
#sphynx asks!#sphynx rambles#i guess i’ll tag this as#smalletho#and#trafficshipping#for filtering#when explaining my thoughts on smalletho (or any ship for that matter) i always feel the need to clarify that um#being someone on the aroace + probably aplatonic spectrum#i always put a bit of that into my headcanon of characters#like in my brain they are never sexually attracted to each other or anyone else#and the relationships aren’t ever easily describable. they just exist as they are without a label.#maybe they kiss maybe they like each other but i never put them in any sort of established romantic relationship in my head#it Is my desire for connection and intimacy without the “rules” and lines between platonic and romantic attraction making itself known#because i don’t really. feel. either? I want to love someone but i am not sure what love entails. and i’d reckon that probably shows LOL#dude i could go on and on about how being aroace feels for me and how i project that onto characters. its honestly. fascinating to me lmao?#i find the topic of love and attraction and friendship and connection and intimacy just incredibly interesting as a whole though LOL#sometimes i feel like some alien (not in a bad way!! ..most of the time) looking in on human life like… how very curious this is! wow!#Honestly i could probably talk about anything for hours. i just really like thinking about things and sharing my thoughts#unfortunately im also terrified of sharing those thoughts and being perceived in general ! social anxiety at its finest here!#i spent the whole day working on this answer lmao. which really shows just how much i struggle putting things into words#and then POSTING those words? i have to reread what ive written a billion times to make sure i don’t sound stupid or insane#and even then i still worry. so at this point its just become.. post and dont look at tumblr for the next while to let the anxiety subside#anyway um.! Yeah.#im going to sleep now. Thumbs up.
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#linked universe#kinda#loz eow#echoes of wisdom#going with some of the popular ones I’ve seen floating around#wanted to post this early cause I want to see what the consensus is before it gets confusing with people calling him all sorts ghgb#anyway happy 1 week eow#v fun game would reccomend#I’ve seen a few others like abyss but not as commonly as these 4#this is just a bonus poll btw#sorry to anyone who hasn’t played or finished the game#idk if I’d count fanon names as like spoiling anything though?#but like if you don’t want spoilers maybe block the loz eow tag? lmao#personally im partial to silence cause it ties to the same sound based meaning that echo does#I do also like might tho#I think the only popular one I’m not too sold on is rift#I can’t even say why cause of spoilers ghgh#I’m sure people have several other cool name ideas for him I wanna hear
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What's the favourite photo you've taken? - they're all so nice!! 💕
awww thank you sm !! <33 tbh I don’t really find any one photo too significant as of yet, not to say they aren’t nice to have but real life moments are nicer :)
these aren’t necessarily my fav photos but could argue might be my favourite “vibes”
this one was taken with a digital point and shoot — while it may be argued objectively shitty and I’m completely aware a toddler could replicate it, I think this is why I love it. the fact that it just is what it is. the untouched scene naturally tells its own story, rather than needing to curate one yourself. I personally find it’s more than just something to look at. this stripped back style evokes more emotion for me than others and I love how the darker lighting does not dull its life. I mean this is all subjective. I personally don’t think this style is the best for every photo (or maybe it could be) but I really like when it works out. as someone who feels disconnected from my own existence a lot of the time, I like that I can live through it a little, as I believe it to be as close to a reflection of my interpretation of the society we live in as possible. while it wouldn’t really matter if this particular photo got deleted. never to be seen again, I’d never know the feeling of this particular moment, until I felt it in real life again. obviously I didn’t quite know all this when randomly taking it while bored on the train but I think that’s the only reason it turned out this way which is even more warming.
but of course, maybe more so than anything, I love my trusty film <3 point and shoot ofc — these photos alongside the header of this blog, again very little effort but somewhat significant of a story. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I like when I’m able to capture a simple image that tells a story/evokes emotion (again, whether or not it portrays a story may be subjective). Especially with minimal effort, cause in my opinion if it’s perfect as is, then surely it’s worth taking a photo of. Film is more reliable to me at this point of my life, while I’m not very experienced (in any kind of photography really) I think it’s hard to fail, in fact I feel as though it almost exceeds my expectations. As someone who has never been any good at technical aspects of any form of art (or the patience to pursue them), I find film enables me to curate something to a standard of which I couldn’t ask for anything better of myself. Not to mention the process of developing etc. meaning I really have to stop and envision my image more so than with digital, which is basically an act of mindfulness (something I’m also usually very bad at). I’m pretty sure the Coca Cola photo was the first photo I ever took on film in 2020 lockdown (besides a barbie disposal I got for xmas as a kid that my parents were mad at me for quickly “wasting” and never to be developed). what I love about all these photos is that I believe I was able to zoom in on (no pun intended, because actually I didn’t) seemingly insignificant moments in life happening all around me so that they could later be recognised as something more. again, in my mind, my life feels very fragile at the best of times so I like that I can hold onto things a little longer when I’m alone. I’m so so glad film has stuck around and I hope I one day fix my favourite film camera and can take more photos like these!
again, hella subjective and have found most people I know to have very different preferences in what photos they think look and feel best, but as of right now these are mine :)
#idk if anyone cares THAT MUCH#but im distracting myself from the fact I’m ruining my academic life but continuing to do so by writing this instead#also I’m literally not a photographer so like idk wot I’m saying I’m just saying wot I’m thinking#the way I went on a full blown ramble in this post ab my life philosophies and then realised no one asked so deleted it lmao#but I’ll leave u with this instead#ultimate yapper#idk which parts of the words I say are real I’m literally insane#I also wrote this while throwing up in my mouth and dizzy as fuck#and now it’s 3am and I want to die bc every second I don’t do my assignment another mark comes off#but now i really can’t do it bc I feel too unwell#soz I’m a literally broken record lmao#not lmao at all#actually I’m pissed cos why can’t I do my critical analysis report rn but I can write this help
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